#which yES MATTERS TO ME
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sigh I wanna start a new blazing blade run...I had one going but I love nothing more than starting new runs of fe games, and the further away I get from a particular run the more likely I am to scrap it...y’know I’ve never finished Sacred Stones? I think I had like two maps to go, and for some reason I lost interest for a year or so and when I came back I restarted instead. I kinda get it, for me the fun of the fe games is making all the decisions about how to level your units, how to build supports and how to clear maps without losing anyone, and the further along in the game it gets the less potential there is for those decisions. And yeah the allure of just finishing the damn thing is still there, but it’s less of a draw than the start of the game where anything is possible. And with Blazing Blade I haven’t played Hector’s mode yet, so I wanna give that a shot (I think I was still in Lyn’s section on my second playthrough). And I still say Blazing Blade is my favorite fe game ever even tho I’ve only ever beaten it once. A lot of it comes down to convenience, it’s much easier to boot up 3H on the switch than basically any other fe game.
of course what I should really do is make another stab at Chapter 3 of Genealogy. Psh, as if.
#catfishchat#I don't remember when I started fe4 but fortunately I logged it on my blog so I can see that it was...#11 months ago.#at least for my current run my first attempt was before that#I scrapped it partway through chapter 2 because I realized I'd missed recruiting someone#which yES MATTERS TO ME#like I said I like playing these for the potential if I miss a character I feel#very much like I'm missing out on something#oh yeah I haven't finished binding blade either lol#that one I might actually go back to my old playthrough#(which I've abandoned for over a year)#I think the gameplay on that one was more clunky so the prospect of restarting is less fun
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i've been so used to the online space where if you like a series or fictional character that someone else hates they will openly berate you and cut you out of their life and tell you to Go Die so when i got into a thing that a friend really didn't like and their only reaction was "i do not like it" and left it at that with no over the top reaction or lecture on Why The Thing They Don't Like Is Bad, honestly i felt like i met god
#i am often reminded my irl friend group is made up of people who act like actual mature adults and every day i am so fucking grateful for it#when i see people going on like: if you like xyz fandom or character you are blocked on sight yes i will kill a friendship over this#my reaction is always something along the lines of: well okay let me just preemptively make sure you and i don't interact ever again ???#and it's NEVER THE TEENS MAKIN THESE POSTS!! WHICH IS WHAT TERRIFIES ME#it's always grownass adults that should be more concerned with idk!!! taxes!! work!! the news!!! LITERALLY ANYTHING THAT ACTUALLY MATTERS
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DCxDP AU: The Ultimate Enemy + The Flash
One of the speedsters (doesn't matter which really) is one of the few survivors of the apocalypse and he just figured out who Phantom is. He can save the world, all he has to do is go back in time and kill Danny Fenton.
Which seems like a great idea, right up to the point where he finds Danny and realizes he is just a 14 year old kid......
#kill your greatest enemy? No no ADOPT your greatest enemy.#Which Flash? Idk the plot works no matter who honestly#And if you are thinking 'he would never plan to kill Danny!'#Well sure under normal circumstances but quite literally the WHOLE WORLD ended. No one is thinking straight after that.#He changes his mind quickly enough.#And yeah the speedsters know better than anyone how dangerous time travel is but desperate times and all that!#dc comics#dc#the flash#danny phantom#danny fenton#dp#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc crossover#dc x dp crossover#dp x dc#barry allen#wally west#my post#if this already exists i am begging you to send me the link#and yes this is more or less boxed lunch's plan but the flash would be way more competent about it#clockwork in the background like 'ahhhh yes all according to plan'
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Redraw of the cape post, because that entire concept deserved better than the illustration I gave it.
#just give 12 a cape it's all I ask#yes I was watching Musketeers again#doctor who fanart#twelfth doctor#clara oswald#whouffaldi#twelveclara#guess who watched Heaven Sent + Hellbent again#I only cried half a tear but I did get Really sweaty#which is an improvement from last time#it took me about 8 years to getting round to watching those 2 episodes because Face the Raven destroyed me so hard#I'm pretty sure I couldnt eat for a whole day after FtR aired#although at that point I had been steadily absorbing Clara's personality into my own for a few years#I don't have a personality I stole it from Clara Oswald#read all of the 12clara books. listened to the audiobooks. Running out of content at a concerning rate#had to buy another comic#one day I'll have consumed all 12+Clara content. Then I'll just have to take matters into my own hands (make it myself)
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ep 43 had me tearing up in a fucking shopping centre ‼️‼️
b+w alt version that I truly couldn't decide if I liked it more . Also I included a lot of thoughts in the tags but they're somewhat incoherent<3
#i dont know what i expected but i was waiting for a friend and too excited to wait until later#malevolent podcast#john doe#john doe malevolent#john malevolent#malevolent fanart#grimm art#ep 43#ep 43 left me with a lot of thoughts ... i didnt quite like how much of a recap it felt like at times but that might#be because ive been relistening and like yeah everyone knows that john 🙄 but that's not the case for everyone and with monthly uploads#things get forgotten easily#i find the discussion of “humanity” so interesting because John has shown that without someone that he has forcibly grown to value as an#equal... something he cannot do as the king of yellow as he is superior to all of his realm and presumably stays out of other elder god's#anyway. without that equality and enviroment to grow he fails to reach his goal of compassion and falls onto old ways.#John. The King in Yellow. shown by both times each has found themselves in human form do not just crave power and influence!!!#THEY CRAVE COMMUNITY!!! an endrich being not born or raised with nothing but power and ego#CRAVES COMMUNITY.#His goal of “humanity” is not a selfless goal like John projects - it is ultimately somewhat selfish as he does not want to be alone!!#which makes this desire so much more human#i don't know maybe this is just me spelling out whats already there but the way john and the witch argued about humanity frustrated me#it felt like they were missing the point or that perhaps the “good/evil” “black/white” retoric was already realised by me and john needed#realise it himself . which is fair !!!#i dont know!!!!#the witch was talking about how bad everyone was and how humanity is cruel and john was talking about Lily (#who also frustrates me how shes used in the plot somewhat she was literally just a nurse doing her job bro#) but to John - yes internally he is struggling with his moral greyness and im so proud of him for growing being himself SO PROUD#JUST.!!! he wants community. he needs community. he loves his friend. 'humanity' at its core does not matter as long as you try to be bette#and i think thats awesome and i really enjoyed the episode#guhh im rambling enjoy my tag rambling i dont know i want john to have more friends :(#yorrick can be another friend godd i love you yorrick so silly
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#united states#us politics#me#vote#voting matters#shoutout to everyone liking and reblogging my terrible photo#very sepia#anyway this is the california “I voted” sticker if you're curious#I had to look to double check but yes the stickers are done by state#which is what I thought
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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Hellsing 2002 calendar illustration.
Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen
A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death
#hellsing#alucard#kouta hirano#translation was found in a comment by u/lazyfoxheart on r/Kurrent#fun fact this is the highest quality version of this image that exists online#i know because i've been looking forever for a version that's clear enough to actually read what hirano wrote under '1443'#but there weren't any so i had to take matters into my own hands#the real image on the back of the guidebook is only 2 inches tall so i had to take this with my smartphone and will my hands not to shake#anyway i'm pretty sure it's supposed to say Eğrigöz (the location vlad was imprisoned) so yeah. thank you hirano very cool#if i might rant for a sec it took me an embarrassingly long time to figure that out because i didn't have the guidebook at first#and in the images i could find online that part was just a blur that looked suspiciously like a person's signature and i was like. who tf#i was thinking matthias corvinus since he issued some political propaganda against vlad iirc but it didn't match his signature on wikipedia#then i thought it might be vlad II dracul's since he probably had to sign an agreement to send his sons over as hostages at some point#but that didnt seem right either so i kept skimming vlad's wiki page#and then i was like goddammit...hirano.....you just misspelled Eğrigöz didn't you.. ....#i maybe should've made a separate post dedicated to this instead of writing a novel in the tags but eh#the hellsing brainrot runs deep#also- i put it in the source link at the bottom of the post but the german inscription is copied off a real woodcut of vlad from 1491#except instead of depicting him as an adult hirano drew him as a child which gives the inscription a very different feel imo#the one final thing that interests me about this is the fact that hirano published this calendar in 2002#which is REALLY early in the series. like this was before volume 5 came out??#i have no idea why he decided to do a massive spoiler drop in a random piece of japan-only merch#sandwiched between a drawing of alucard as john travolta from saturday night fever and integra as a fish no less#it makes me really curious to know what the fan response to this was back then. like did people even know who this was#maybe im just an idiot and everyone back then was like 'ah yes its alucard as a 12 year old. how very informative'
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[click for better quality]
Every now and again I have fun being very dragon obsessed and challenge myself with a side project-- This time, it's Stardew Valley characters as Wings of Fire dragons! Starting with one of the first people you meet :)
#should also mention that the nightwing in the comic is NOT Demetrius! that's my farmer Jet#I promise there's another reason why she's a rainwing and it's funny#to me. which is what matters ultimately/j#yes art#sdv fanart#sdv#stardew valley#stardew valley fanart#wings of fire#WOF#WOF rainwing#WOF nightwing#wings of fire art
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And never let you go ♥
Bonus without the overspill lighting:
#💟#Digital art#Full Art#Art#Edgar#Scriabin#It's that time of year again where I get real sappy about Vargas ♥ Because yes! Once again it is my own personal Vargasversary! 🎊 Yaaaay#Seven years now - I don't know what to do with seven years it feels like a hard to define number haha#Right in the middle between five years and ten years! A while to be certain but hard to define as a Long Time either hmm#Well whatever it doesn't matter <3 The important part is that I still love Vargas and them very much ♥♪#I actually didn't really have any specific plans for this Vargasversary :0 I haven't been drawing them much again#Other things have drawn my focus and attention hehe ♪#So I just kinda set my hand loose - no sketches on paper no defined idea - this is just what my hand/brain came up with in the moment#I'm pleased :) I think it accurately expresses how I feel about them hehe <3#I wrote down what ended up being the text/caption a couple months ago while I was in Big Love in their direction#I don't remember what inspired it anymore other than just - They ♥ Themst ♥ Do love them <3#I've planned my next reread now ♪ Barring anything drastic (like an update lol) I know when I'll be rereading next#I'm looking forward to it! :D As always hehe <3#It's still a bit a ways off which works well for recharging :)#And of course I'll be doing my usual in the meanwhile - this and the main anniversary and my sketchdumps and Requestober haha#The caption is as much me as it is Edgar after all <3#Even quiet and sleeping I still find them as a comfort - a place I find rest and joy in ♥#Inspiring and lovely and wonderful - pretty and tender and dear!#Oh and#Always finding a way to flip up the bottom of the shirt#Hehe <3
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grif's surgery but just a little more... obvious?
I actually rly rly ADORE frankengrif but I don't have an in-show reason why he'd have extensive long-term allogeneic skingrafts on his face 😔
#rvb#red vs blue#dexter grif#grif#*24#mine#art#cw wounds#Look I love biology stuff like this so I like researching what would be at least semi-plausible even if it's just for a dumb halo show that#makes 0 sense where CPR cures a headshot but i cant help it!!! and like the 'lazy' reason for it would be sarge is just crazy like that but#its not a good reason imo. and like the things he lists needing replacement are mostly internal and body parts which makes sense#considering how grif got injured by sheila like I could 100% see that rupturing organs and crushing his hand and there being burns etc#but like nothing points to grif needing any surgery above the neck and i dont think anyone mentions his face being different? i could#make up injuries for him but nothing in the show actually supports that he'd need grafts for anything but his body..#I'm SOO ready to be convinced otherwise btw like I said I want an obvious frankengrif to be true so bad !!#AGH would it be too insane of me to make like a surgery/injury overview thing for grif just so i can convince myself abt this idea...#i can bend to some fun stuff tho im not a total joykill u know! thats why i give his body the mismatched donor skin look despite allogeneic#grafts not being permanent w/ current tech. like it really doesn't matter if it's realistic or whatever but also Yes It Does.#and like during/after chorus would grey offer to 'fix' it? i imagine the feds could mesh a skin so they could use grif's own skin..#or like during rats nest when they got reassigned?
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This isn't, like, the biggest deal, but I do find it funny when people are almost... surprised or shocked that converts unironically believe in judaism and also unironically align themselves with jewishness. It's just something I've seen a small handful of times and it's like... of course I (and others!) unironically believe in this stuff. I'm not putting in this work because I don't have enough going on in my life
#jumblr#jewish conversion#jew by choice#personal thoughts tag#the shock is mostly (ime) 'wait you actually believe that??' in a weird tone#like! yes! i find fulfillment in... much of judaism!! that's what drew me in#it's like some people expect us to be like... secretly xtian or secretly not believe in judaism for nefarious reasons??#like frankly if i wanted an easier time of it i'd just go back to being an ex-xtian agnostic (which i obviously am not)#but judaism fulfills me. i know the happiness i feel is genuine contentment and the feeling of home#but yeah. i do unironically think of jews as my intrinsic equal *and* a people i want to be part of#if i didn't see them/us as equal i wouldn't be here. i do my best to deepen my... allyship?? alliance??? with the people i want to join#and that's something that takes a lot of time and effort and it's something that's important regardless#i often don't find this stuff offensive but it makes me wonder what they think converts are... converting to? why wouldn't we believe this?#like ik it's complex but at the same time it's a matter of... i'm aware of my own intentions for conversion and it has nothing to do...#...with my past as an 'xtian.' it has nothing to do with tricking people or being bored or whatever else might be nefarious like that#xtian in quotes because i don't think i ever was one though i was raised in that environment by people who *were* xtian
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i know i didn't used to tag fics as 'one shots' because i remember i started doing it after what felt to me like an increasing number of "is there more of this?"/"what happens next?" type comments, and prior to this i'd thought that unless something was marked as unfinished it would be assumed to be complete, but also i feel like it actually was? we didn't even have to call things 'one shot' they were just fics and the outliers were the 'longfics' (which everyone complained about the lack of). and people subscribe now to what i think of as obviously finished fics. (this did a number on my brain for a while as i thought i had somehow just forgotten how to end a story.)
i don't know if anything did actually change (in the past 3-4 years?) in Fandom In General but it feels like it did.
#i'm told tiktokers talk about “full fics” and “complete stories” but sorry it *is* complete if the author's told what the wanted to tell.#yes even if it was only 100 words long!#or “only” 10k words (which used to be Unusually Long Fic to me no matter who wrote it)#i don't like having to tell people that there's no more of the fic they liked :S it feels like i'm being rude or denying folk for no reason#but! also! sometimes the story was good *because* it stopped after 2000 words! short stories don't all expand seamless and *well*!#my fanfiction insecurities: part 798343233#fandom#ao3#(cos thats where it started so maybe the site does play a role)
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Felt like doing fanart so I gave Jiro a sword
#oh my gods the front leg damn near sent me into an early grave#I saw the reference and I was like “ooh that’s so cool I wanna draw that!’’#and then I started drawing and was like “oh. oh NO’’#so yeah this is as good as that leg is gonna get#the whole thing should be curvier but whatever#I’m still happy with it#which is what matters#it’s also probably the fastest I’ve ever drawn a complete body with clothes!!#only took me like….#idk 5 and a half hours or so?#usually takes me multiple days#could I clean it up some more and actually draw the hands? yes.#will I? no. I don’t feel like it.#randum thots#some art i made#jirou kyouka#bnha#mha#mha fanart#my art#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#fanart
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The most infuriating form of sanism is this idea that mentally ill people/people with mental disorders are just too stupid or too unenlightened to know how to be a proper, well-adjusted person
So many therapists have ignored signs of my unwellness simply because they assumed I was just... being stupid, and I just needed educating about why I'm acting disordered (apparently, mental disorders stop disordering you once you are condescendingly told why you're just disordered and dumb, who knew (sarcasm)).
Like, I could tell them that I knew my behaviour wasn't "rational," wasn't "reasonable" to do or believe and I'd still be treated like I was so dumb I needed hand-holding and scolding about why I'm acting disordered.
I truly wish that people would be able to take the idea of guidance and stop twisting it into "I am superior and enlightened and the people I am trying to help are stupid and wrong and beneath me!"
#mental health#mental health advocacy#ableism#ableism tw#sanism#sanism tw#yes therapist i was aware that using 1/3 of a bottle of detergent for a medium-sized load of laundry isn't rational...#...and that it could wreck my clothes and my washer (which is why i brought it up in the first place. because i knew it wasn't right)...#...like that's an example and it's SO infuriating just how high of a horse some professionals (and even laypeople) put themselves on...#...like when you stop viewing patients as PEOPLE who need guidance and start viewing them as essentially helpless idiots you have a problem#and that problem should either be addressed or you should leave the practice utterly if you're a licensed professional#call me crazy but i don't think this attitude is conducive to the PATIENT'S well-being#the PATIENT is the person who matters. the PATIENT is the most important part of this ENTIRE interaction#the instance i was thinking about in this tag rant fucking *destroyed* my trust in that therapist#because it just told me that i wasn't being seen as a *person* but as an *issue*#and regardless of if that was their intention i still don't think it was appropriate#you can have the *best* intentions and still be ignorant and say/do ignorant things. even with the best intentions#having 'good intentions' does not absolve you of harm or absolve you of the capability TO harm#another reason i Do Not Like CBTherapy
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reddit:
literally every other WOT viewer in the world:
#they've been saying this ever since the finale aired and it drives me CRAZY#have your personal opinions all you want but to say that 2x08 was objectively a weak episode is simply not correct#cinematography acting vfx choreography music EVERYTHING was at the absolute top of its game#and despite being an Exciting Battle Episode it was completely anchored in character moments & emotional resonance which is no easy feat#so much going on yet there was time for every major character to get a huge developmental/emotional beat#(yes even those like nynaeve whose beat was a loss rather than a victory)#every season arc was either wrapped up in an immensely satisfying way or was set up for a deeper examination next season#and 90% of the general audience absolutely loved it#and yet reddit acts like it's an Accepted Fact that it was poor quality#just bc the book-to-show changes in that episode weren't to THEIR PERSONAL taste#touch grass#wot#seeing as season finales will always have the biggest moments it's kinda inevitable that hardcore book fans#will always be the most sensitive to any changes made in those particular episodes#not to mention that the changes made in eps 1-7 will snowball and culminate in the finale#so i feel like finales are always gonna be judged the most harshly by readers#like if dumai's wells isn't an exact 1:1 recreation of the book version#readers are 1000000% going to flip their shit no matter how objectively good the show's version actually is#wot book spoilers#for the replies
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