#which would never happen btw but we can imagine it at least.

[sleetkissed]

Her day couldn't get worse.

❝ I take the Netherstones now. Lest you fat-finger that too. Incompetent rat. ❞

@zalimbane

[kyber-crystal]

red thread || jake “hangman” seresin

summary: fate has a funny way of bringing people together, and it’s made no exception for you and hangman. you’ve grown up together; there's not a day that goes by in which you aren't glued to each others' sides. as kids, you promised each other that if you were still single at 30 you'd get married. but when that day finally arrives, you wonder just how much things will change.

words: ~2.3k

warnings: nothing. unless you’re like me and commitment scares you, then yeah lmao. hangman is an absolute gentleman in this though :) biggest TW is my writing...sorry. idk what happened. some slight mentions of angst and injury but nothing graphic :)

a/n: mannn my writing has gone downhill idk how yall other talented writers do it. i wish i could write that well 😭but, i’m proud of this...plotwise, at least! (my fics are doing so bad for some reason while everyone else seems to be blowing up??? idk) btw, the first part of this fic takes place two years before tgm

It was 1:30 a.m, and you couldn’t fall asleep. 

It seemed that Hangman had the same idea as you as he told you to meet him outside the Hard Deck in five. The coastal air and Jake Seresin was the perfect combination to help you unwind, so of course you said yes. 

“There she is,” he grinned as he offered a helping hand. “My favorite fellow insomniac.”

“Nightmares keep you up, Jake?” you teased. “What’s the matter this time?”

“Same as you. Don’t feel like sleeping yet,” Hangman answered. “Can you believe it? We’re awake, and Fanboy and Payback aren’t.”

“Now that’s a first,” you laughed. “Thought I’d never live to see that day, but here we are.”

“We’re making history day by day.”

“You know…sometimes,” you breathed out as you rested your head on his shoulder, “I wonder what it’d be like if we never met.”

“Didn’t you ask that same question fifteen years ago?”

“We were much younger back then. It’s different now.”

“Well, then…I don’t like to imagine it.”

Your brows furrowed. “Why not?”

“It’d be weird. You’ve always been a big part of my life, so to think you almost could’ve not been in it…it’s weird. Uncomfortable, even.”

“Yeah, it is weird…” your voice trailed off as you lingered on the thought. You’ve always done everything together. How different would your lives be now if you hadn’t become friends; hadn’t stayed in touch through college? “But don’t be sad, because I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.”

Hangman gave you a light punch in the arm. “I’m not complaining.”

“Good.”

“You know, Y/N…there’s one more thing.”

“Uh oh.”

“Hear me out,” he started. “Remember that deal we made when we were kids?”

“The one about helping each other bury a body if needed, or getting married?”

“The second one…I thought the first was a given since the day we met. That’s something all friends are supposed to do for each other, right? Bury bodies, hide their trails…all that good stuff.”

“What about the second one?”

“We’re turning 30 soon,” he recounted. Any and all traces of cockiness were completely wiped off his face. “And we said that if we’re both still single by the time our 30th birthdays roll around, we’d get married.”

You smiled as you revisited the memory: wide-eyed and curious, and so blissfully unaware with the only worry in the world was whether you’d grow up together or not. “You still remembered all that?”

“Of course I did. You still in, or what?”

“I guess so…I mean, what else do I have to lose?”

The two of you fall back into your comfortable silence, and he wraps you up into his arms. 

TWO YEARS LATER

As usual, the base is busy and rather chaotic: day after day you’re busy filing reports and training. This causes you to become prone to forgetting the littler things in your life, so you assign Bob to keep track of them for you. He had the best memory of anyone you knew—that man kept mental notes of everything. 

“What do I have to do today, Floyd? Any events…”

“Uhhh…” Bob thought for a moment as you took a long drink of water. “Dinner with Phoenix. Do laundry. Don’t get yelled at by Cyclone for the 19th time (You’re only one point behind Bradshaw, he’s at 20). Grocery shopping. And most importantly…yours’ and Hangman’s birthday.”

“Oh, shit, I completely forgot,” you swore under your breath. “How could I forget…”

“You have some time, so don’t worry. Five days.”

“Only five days?” your eyes widened. “I have to run through four more simulations over the next two. I can’t plan everything in the remaining three.”

“If you pay Garcia in Doordash deliveries, he’ll help out. You know he minored in art.”

“That’s…actually not a bad idea.”

After you finish your final exercise that week, you pass out, but luckily, Hangman’s right there to catch you so you don’t get a concussion. Bless that man—he always seemed to be around wherever you went and you were very grateful for it. 

You were delirious and couldn’t walk straight, so as much as you claimed you were okay, he wouldn’t believe you. 

“I’m taking you home because you’re in no condition to be wandering around by yourself. The birthday planning can wait. You’ve tired yourself out enough as it is and you don’t want to make things worse.” So you let him help you get into his car, then drive you home and lead you inside. Then, he forced you to go upstairs to take a hot shower and relax while he cooked up dinner for you. 

Though Hangman admired your determined spirit, it scared the hell out of him because you wouldn’t know when to stop yourself. 

“I got that from you though! Who’s the one I spend the most time around?” you’d claim in response to that  argument. You weren’t wrong—it was a quality you picked up from him many years ago.

You woke up the next morning to the smell of French toast and jam, which lessens the tension in your shoulders right away. Amidst the early morning light drifting through the windows he stands out like a priceless work of art in a museum. You struggle to tear your eyes off him. 

Rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes, you rested your chin on his shoulder and exhaled. “Hey.”

“Morning. You sleep okay? How’s that headache of yours?”

“I’m alright.” You closed your eyes and inhaled the sweet scent of cinnamon sugar. “This smells nice.”

If Hangman was tired, you couldn’t tell. “Woke up at 6:30 to relearn the recipe for you. It’s been a while, it took three burnt batches to get the hang of things.”

“You woke up an hour early to cook for me?” 

“Why else? Of course I did,” he stated matter-of-factly. 

You sat down at the kitchen island together and ate your breakfast in silence. Something about this moment feels more domestic than all the others you’ve shared in the past, and you can’t help but smile. You wouldn’t mind spending the rest of eternity like this...

“Y/N, there’s some honey on your chin.”

You blinked, trying to find it. “Where?”

“Hold on a sec.” Hangman took his napkin and rubbed gently at the corner of your lip to wipe it off. For a brief moment, you could feel his warm breath fanning across your face. You stayed as still as possible. “There.”

If anyone looked in from the outside, it was another simple day in the life of a longtime couple. But for you and Jake, it’s always been like this. Showing up at each others’ place wasn’t unusual for either of you; if anything, it was quite normal. 

“...Thanks.”

“Yeah. You got any ideas in mind? For the big day.”

“Whatever you want is what I want.”

“Funny enough, that’s what I was about to tell you,” he replied.” 

You locked eyes with each other and laughed. “We’ll figure it out. I’m sure we will.”

Less than three days until everything as you knew it would change forever...if you were being honest, you were absolutely terrified. What if he changed his mind and left you in the dust, all alone? You weren’t ready to face the cold truth. 

Hangman offered a simple celebration: food and drinks at the Hard Deck with the crew, then some karaoke if you were up for it after. He starts it off by serenading you at the bar, reaching a hand out to you as he sang your favorite Billy Joel track. You let him lead you out to the dance floor and spin you around, and he’s equal parts addicting as he is entertaining. 

Thirty candles, and you agree on blowing out fifteen each—somehow, by some miracle, you manage to do exactly that, and it’s perfect. Then Fanboy yells that he and Rooster want a rematch with you in Just Dance…so you go at it for two hours straight, until sweat is dripping down your face and your sweater grows hot. 

You’re burnt out, and he can see the look in your eyes as you step aside to let Phoenix play. “You want to head out? There’s something I want to show you.”

You nod. “Okay.”

He gives Maverick a look, and the captain shoots him a subtle nod in return. He takes this as his signal to put his hand on the small of your back and lead you out the door. 

You can’t help but laugh a little as you get outside. “Is this Mav’s motorcycle?”

“No…” Hangman shifts from foot to foot, feigning cluelessness. 

“Did you steal it?”

“Of course not.”

“It’s his, isn’t it.”

“Look, he let me borrow it for the night. It’s not stealing if he says it’s okay…besides, he never noticed when I did steal from him last week—”

“What did you—do you even have a motorcycle license?”

“Got it a year ago. I thought, ‘maybe I’ll take my best girl on a ride someday, so who knows if it’ll come in handy’. So here we are now.”

“That’s very sweet.”

“Alright, now come on.” He swung his leg over the side and motioned for you to sit behind him. The cushion was not in fact, cushiony, and you found yourself growing colder by the second.

The bike burst forward without warning. You let out a small yelp and immediately wrapped your arms around Hangman’s waist—which was ridiculously firm…had he been working out more lately?—as you went speeding down the road. 

“If I die, I’m gonna kill you and haunt you in your sleep,” you mumbled into the fabric of his jacket. “Even in death, I’ll stick to you always.”

“That sounds both morbid and weirdly romantic.”

“Shut up.”

Several minutes later you found yourselves by the cliffs, standing high over the ocean, and deja vu hits almost right away. After we go on this make up date, he had said, I’m going to find that guy who messed you up and mess him up. Then we’re going to go home, I’ll let you wear any of my sweatshirts you want, and we’ll watch true crime. One where someone like that jerk dies. Okay? Okay.

You’re miles away from Top Gun, miles away from your jet and your uniform and everything you’ve ever known, but you’ve never felt more at home than now. It’s in this moment in which you realize all you really need in the world is Jake, the sky above you, and the sea below you. 

Out of the corner of your eye you noticed that he’s getting fidgety. He can’t stop stuffing his hands in and out of his pockets or running them through his hair—he’s restless. The action takes you by surprise a bit. 

“Why are you all tensed up?” you questioned. “It’s just me and a nice sunset. We’ve done things like this many times.”

“But it’s not just you and a sunset,” he explained. “I’m supposed to be asking you the most important question of our lives. That’s a big deal, sweetheart.”

Your heart spluttered to a stop. “Are you…”

“Let me finish,” Jake cut in. “If you could be quiet for a few minutes…that would help. I’m nervous.”

“Jake Seresin, nervous?” you teased. “That’s a first.”

He smiled and shook his head. “Give me a break.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll be nice…for now.”

“I haven’t slept at all in the past week. I went to eleven different jewelry stores around San Diego but nothing seemed to scream ‘Y/N’. So, I decided to take a trip out of state.” He cleared his throat, and reached into his jacket pocket. You saw his hand shake as he did so. “Out of the country. That mini mission I went on while you were training? I was in Canada. Victoria, to be specific. Maverick and Rooster came along to help out.”

Now in his hand was a small velvet box, and inside was the most breathtaking ring you’d ever seen. “Diamond and ruby. They don’t sell plain red strings for rings…so I had them design this. The red thread of fate…the one that brought you into my life. We were kids when we promised to spend our lives together, if circumstances permitted. And I know we might’ve been young, but I’d be lying if I said I could imagine myself with someone that wasn’t you. There was a part of me that wished you wouldn’t find anyone before this day came along. It’s you, Y/N. It always has been.

“I’m not going to get down on one knee. I’m not going to give you a long, cheesy speech about divine power and soulmates. But I’m going to tell you this: you’re my forever, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. It’s getting cold out so I’ll cut to the chase: what I’m saying here is that I’m asking you to marry me.”

The world fell silent as you replied with a shaky nod, holding out a trembling hand as Jake slid the golden band onto your ring finger. Neither of you made a sound, and you swore you felt time stop and the ground crack wide open beneath your feet.

tags, including those who may be interested: @callsignbarb @sarcastic-sourwolf @totomoshi @sebastianstangirl01 @dilfsandtherapy @purelyfiction @yeehawnana @lunamoonbby @hazelgirl355 @multifandom-fangirl4 @paintballkid711 @lyn-lc @spawn0fsatan @milestomaverick @teacactusworld @newlibrary @cherry-waved @ellabellabus07 @criminalyetminimal @whatlovegattado @thisismypointofview @ice-mans-world @burnedbrisket @fangirlinc @knowledgefulbutterfly @levis-butterfingers @lunamooncole @coastingline @chaoticassidy @hbstre @fantasias-creativebubble @light-the-moon @winteryoungie @aie1840 @midnightdevotion @julia-marshal @anya7802 @bittergomez @and-claudia @cosm1cfae @tallrock35 @uwiuwi @elenavampire21 @aerangi @hoedameronsworld @whotfatemywaffles @littlebadariell

[redxx95]

Exploring Kurosawa's internalized homophobia and compulsive heterosexuality

oh yea baby we bustin out the Big Words for this one 😎

This was supposed to be posted at the end of pride month but Life happened and it got delayed a lot 😩 So yea happy pride month (and happy birthday Kurosawa I guess 😂)

(btw I think I've never mentioned this on any of my other posts but english is not my first language, so if anything I write ever sounds awkward, that's probably why 😅) (also I had to merge a bunch of images to get around the image limit, this post is really long, the word count is at 1930 words 💀)

Hope you guys enjoy the read! 💞

Spoilers for anything up to vol 11

Let me start this by saying that there's no actual textual evidence of Kurosawa being gay (rather than bi/pan), so this interpretation is definitely veering towards headcanon territory. I'm also not trying to establish this as the only Correct opinion and anyone is of course allowed to have their own sexuality headcanons, this is very healthy and valid 👍

Kurosawa's internalized homophobia

The first scene I want to put under a magnifying glass is this one.

Let's examine what's going on here: Kurosawa has just tried to kiss Adachi, whose hesitation he perceived as disgust. Then he pretends it was disgusting for him too, because he thinks that is the average reaction anyone would have, extending this to Adachi as well. The way he says "who'd be into that?" is already lowkey homophobic, but the japanese line makes it even more evident: "普通嫌だよな" (= "Normally, you'd dislike that right?"). Keyword here being "普通" = "normal, ordinary", implying that anyone who would like that is abnormal. So what does that say about him then, who was so happy to get the chance to kiss another man? This is pretty much textbook internalized homophobia, where he has accepted what he perceives to be the general opinion on gay people and has made those values his own, hating himself for it (albeit only briefly here), which is why he internally apologizes to Adachi.

This is not the only instance of him feeling like that, although this next part is slightly more speculative than the more obvious example above.

So we all know that Kurosawa is a jealous, jealous man. It's one of his defining character traits and it's often the source of conflict and comedy alike. But he does not express his jealousy equally across genders. With men he has this strong rivalry where he needs to prove himself better and more worthy of Adachi's attention.

But with women he has a different approach: gently coaxing them away from him, lest they realize what a catch Adachi really is.

So, why this difference? The answer I have is that he doesn't actually believe he can compete with a woman. If Adachi wants to be close with a man, Kurosawa thinks it might as well be him, he's the best option after all. But if Adachi wants a woman, he cannot offer anything and is therefore the inferior option. He believes this even after he found out Adachi's not completely repulsed at the idea of being with a man. Even if Adachi's okay with men, he'll always prefer a woman.

And whenever he imagines anyone else with Adachi, it's always a woman, specifically Fujisaki, which he believes is "his type".

And he at least thinks he's very far away from that ideal. (He's not but that's a topic for a different essay.) If anyone's wondering why he even bothers at all then if he's so sure that a woman will out-compete him, I think the lyrics from the anime opening actually put it best, specifically the last verse:

I have these impatient feelings I doubt this love will come to fruition But still I can't give up this happiness There's a feeling here I can't resist A love like a castle in the sky

So basically, his plan is that he might as well ride the high of his first ever crush as far as it will go, intercepting where he can to prolong it just that little bit further, until it all inevitably comes to an end. (a castle in the sky = an unreachable dream) This plan kind of fluctuates throughout volumes 1-3 as Adachi gives him a bunch of mixed signals, but it holds true most of the time.

Adachi's side

Now I'd like to highlight the way Adachi actually thinks about their relationship, because it serves as a great contrast to Kurosawa's assumptions about him.

Throughout the first three volumes we see him grapple with his newfound feelings for Kurosawa, but he (almost) never puts his gender at the forefront of his musings. The manga makes it very clear that it's his lack of romantic experience and low self esteem that make it hard for him to accept Kurosawa's affections, and not the fact that he's a man.

This second page here being his own little gay awakening, where he realizes that he is not, in fact, disgusted by intimacy with a man.

It's also worth mentioning that when he later introduces Kurosawa to his parents (ch 41), they are immediately welcoming of him, suggesting he grew up in a very tolerant environment.

And it's not like he's completely unaware of heteronormativity/homophobia either, especially after he does his research in vol 8, but he is slightly more defiant in responding to it.

(I love how he just buys that bag he probably doesn't need that's supposed to come with all the wedding magazines, just as this very tiny act of rebellion.)

So now that we can see how different Kurosawa's thought patterns are compared to Adachi's, the next question we should ask ourselves is: Why is he like that?

Heteronormativity in Kurosawa's life

(yes we're finally getting to the comphet part of the essay 😂)

First let's look at the environment he grew up in. There are not many scenes with his family, but from those that we do have, we can at least make some assumptions about how he must've been raised.

His mother is clearly the authority figure in his life, judging by how she's described as "strong" and how terrified he is at her merely setting down a teacup (while Adachi has a more mild reaction). Her reaction to the news of them dating and Kurosawa expecting his parents to go as far as disowning him for it would suggest that she might just be generally homophobic.

But when they actually go meet her we see this slightly more nuanced perspective.

She's not entirely against it, but she does believe they are making a mistake by choosing to be together, hence why she thinks they might "regret it". There's many hardships that gay couples in Japan face, some of which we even see discussed in the manga, so it's not hard to see why she would be concerned for her son. The way she talks about Kurosawa never causing any problems, but "changing" ever since he fell for Adachi further supports that conformity is what she believes will ultimately lead to a successful, happy life. And that's also why she accepts Adachi later, when he's made it abundantly clear in his speech that they are happier in this non-conforming relationship than they were without it.

To contrast, her other child Mari is shown to have a very progressive stance (see: her pep talk in ch 47) and it would not surprise me if that is the reason she's rarely in japan and is never seen together with her family, save for the one time they're all at the wedding. She might find the conforming environment too restrictive and preferring to keep her distance. (shoutout to naina for this bit 🙏)

So that's Kurosawa's family situation. Now let's check how his social circle holds up.

From what we see of his friends, they never even seem to consider him possibly being with a man.

And his work environment seems rather toxic to say the least.

It clearly dictates traditional gender roles as the ideal. Nobody except Fujisaki even clocks any of Kurosawa's advances on Adachi as romantic in nature, even though he seems to be quite obvious about it (see: ch 34.5). And it's not like dating in general is discouraged at Toyokawa either, as we can see from all the women constantly vying for Kurosawa's attention.

From all this we can conclude that Kurosawa's upbringing and social/work environment is painfully heteronormative and until he falls for Adachi it seems he never questioned the status quo either.

The famous onsen scene, while funny, also reveals the sad truth that Kurosawa, in his 30 years of life, probably never even had the chance to explore his sexual orientation, rather focusing on being "perfect" in his straight relationships.

Speaking of those relationships...

He apparently had a bunch of girlfriends, who all seem to have dumped him pretty early on. His mother's surprise at him expressing a willingness to commit also makes me think he's never brought anyone home either. He also only seems to have a surface level understanding of what a proper relationship is supposed to entail, if his idea of an ideal date is just "what the average person" thinks is romantic. So why were all of his relationships so short-lived? Before I answer that...

Intermission: Kurosawa's smiles

It has come to my attention that this is not common knowledge, so let me explain: There's a way to tell apart Kurosawa's fake smiles from his real ones, without any context clues, just purely visually.

Real smiles: (ch 23, 24, 37)

Fake smiles: (ch 5, 13, 32)

The difference being very simple: Blush = real, no blush = fake 👍 And before anyone mentions it: No he doesn't just blush when he's around Adachi, that last fake smile is actually directed at him. (ch 32)

Edit from the future: This holds true like 90% of the time, but as Toyota's art style becomes more detailed, this doesn't apply as much in the newer volumes. I think there's also new details added that I haven't quite figured out yet so take this bit with a grain of salt. (The images below are still from her early art style though.)

So now that we have this additional knowledge, let's take a look at every instance Kurosawa is paired with a woman.

He's smiling in all of these. Not a single one has a real smile in it though.

I think he's never actually had his heart in any of his relationships, and the girls probably noticed it and that's why they dumped him.

And, of course, the first time he actually falls in love...

... just so happens to be with a man.

Even his friends comment on this, who have known him since high school.

It's almost funny how perfectly this aligns with real life gay people. Having numerous, short-lived relationships with people of the "wrong" gender is one of the more common traits of compulsive heterosexuality. (source: me oof) (but also shoutout to the "Am I a lesbian?" masterdoc, google it if you don't know, it's truly eye-opening)

After dating Adachi

So we have already established that he's far happier when he does finally get to date Adachi, but do any of his other thought patterns change?

Honestly it seems like he throws every single reservation about being seen as gay out the window.

He starts bragging like crazy about his new relationship to anyone willing (and unwilling) to listen, he has no qualms about PDA, he marks Adachi up and down so everyone knows he's taken and the only thing stopping him from proclaiming his love for Adachi to the whole world is the still very much existing societal homophobia. But he is a lot more easy-going about it now than he ever was before.

And I think the best way to describe this mental shift is, hear me out, the date song from volume 4...

... specifically the last 2 verses as a whole, and this section in particular:

"I won't let anyone divide our fraction! You couldn't pry this thrill from my hands when they're cold and dead!"

Horrible lyrics aside, this perfectly encapsulates how Kurosawa simply couldn't care less anymore now that he finally has what he's wanted for more than a year, maybe even his whole life. All the societal pressure pales in comparison to the sheer euphoria he feels at finally having someone that he loves and who loves him back just as strongly, feeling cared for and seen like no one else ever did.

And, you know, just happens to be a man. 🏳️‍🌈

[bisexualbrainrots]

for my 911 what if, I once mentioned to @a-mel0n how I'd like for bucktommy's first kiss + time to happen in 3x09 because it just fitted with the theme of the episode (fallout) so I came up with this (long) snippet of their scenes from the ep (1/4). i also wrote this while sleepy so sorry if there are any inconsistencies <3

they're in tommy's place btw!

also, with some help I decided to keep the abby thing, but here it's way juicier! also yeah I'd like to tell y'all about andy sometime, he's the best.

The fridge made that sound again as it was opened, two cold beers being pulled out of it “And I’m sitting there thinking to myself “I have to run, I cannot be a second more with this guy”, that’s why I texted you, actually” 

Buck nods as Tommy gives him one of the bottles, open by the time it reaches his hands “Oh so I was just the distraction then” he smirks at the older, tilting his head, giving the beer a sip as the bottle reaches his lips and Tommy rolls his eyes, taking a sip too.

“Pretty much” he said deadpan as he leaned against the refrigerator.

His date had been horrible, and Tommy was ready to curse at one of his basketball buddies who suggested a blind date. The man wasn’t ugly by any chance, even making Tommy feel weak in his knees when he saw him, but it was his personality that made him want to run towards a cliff. The guy was negativity incarnate, complaining about anything and everything: the place was too quiet, the music wasn’t that great, the waiters were too slow, and the food wasn’t so good. But the last straw was something Tommy could never accept on anyone.

“He said he hates sweets Evan, I mean, What the hell?” Tommy moved towards the living room with Buck following him behind.

“To be fair, I don’t think there’s anyone who has the same sweet tooth as you, Tommy” Buck chuckled when the older shot him one of his looks, and shook his head as they sat on the couch.

“And it’s their loss then” he drank another sip of his beer, resting his head on the cushions “Hating sweets… What else does he hate? Rainbows? Fun?” he nudged Buck's shoulder when he heard the, very loud, laugh come out of his lips “Don’t laugh at me Evan!”

“I… I'm sorry” he had to take deep breaths to calm himself down “But you have to admit it's kind of funny that you're so worked up about a guy not liking sweets, I don't even eat them so often”

Tommy leaned in closer to Buck “That’s just because you try to get on ketosis every year, Don't forget I've seen you on cheat days too!” A second of silence happened before the two men were laughing, shoulders shaking as they tried to compose themselves again “Okay, okay… maybe I'm thinking too much about it, but it's just that I wanted my first time back in the dating scene to feel… special? I guess? I just… I wanted something good, not a date from hell” he sighed, taking another sip.

Buck tilted his head, a comforting smile on his lips “Was the guy at least cute?”

Tommy left the bottle on the coffee table to cover his face with hands and groaned as he sank his body into the couch “He was, and so hot too, which I don't know if it makes it worse that he was such a… pessimist, if I want to be nice” 

Buck whistled “Jeez, I don't want to imagine what you would call him if you weren't nice” he snickered when Tommy's fingers revealed his, very, annoyed eyes “But I get it, after Abby…” he stiffened, not knowing if it was appropriate to continue.

They hadn't really talked about Abby yet, besides that one time before Buck moved out of her apartment, and the younger didn’t know how to approach the subject either, not wanting to make Tommy uncomfortable.

The older gave him a sympathetic look, gesturing at him to continue “It’s okay, we can talk about her”

Buck took a breath, leaving his bottle on the table before speaking “After her I didn’t feel ready either, and it didn’t get any better when I realised I wasn’t the same guy I was before, like… I didn’t want to have something meaningless just to fill a void” he looked down when talking, avoiding the older’s gaze as he fidgeted with his fingers, “I’d say she was… transformative, in a way” he exhaled deeply, furrowing his brows “If I’m honest, a part me feels like I wasted so much time wishing for her to come back, and I regret it, you… You shouldn’t regret this Tommy, a bad date it’s better than stalling” 

Tommy held his shoulder for a while, squeezing a little to give him comfort “Hey, you’re better now Evan, and I could see back then how you weren’t ready to move on so, I don’t think you stalled, not really and… Thank you, for everything”

Buck lifted his head, a question in his face as he looked at the older “Tommy I… What do you mean “everything”?”

Tommy gave him a soft smile, shifting his body and resting his head on the heel of his hand “You helped me when Andy…” he took a deep breath, looking up for a few seconds before turning his gaze back to Buck “When he left, and you were the only to actually ask me how I was doing when nobody wanted to”

Buck frowned “They wanted to, Tommy, it’s just… they thought it was best for you to come to them when you were ready, Chimney almost caved once too” it was his turn to squeeze the other’s shoulder now, stroking the fabric “The only difference between them and me is that I don’t care that I get into everyone’s business” both men chuckled, the air feeling much lighter.

“Okay, but still, thank you for that I… I really needed someone then and I’m glad it was you, even though at the time it didn’t feel like it”

“Oh I know it, I had to fight the words out of you Kinard” he grinned at the older, who once again rolled his eyes at Buck, pushing his shoulder lightly. He looked at him for a while, a question popping into his mind suddenly, “Hey, can I ask you something unrelated?”

“Yeah?”

“Were you ever uncomfortable with me before I dated Abby?”

Tommy was stunned, not expecting the question, but also not understanding the point Buck was trying to make, or insinuating “Uhm, what do you mean Evan?”

Buck exhaled looking away, knowing the explanation could make it worse “I mean… I know I was a bit of a player before, new girl every night kind of guy and I fear… that it was one of the reasons you hated me so much” he brought his left leg closer to his chest, caressing the knee to soothe himself.

“Evan… I, I never hated you, not really” Tommy moved his body closer, chasing Buck’s gaze to make sure they were eye to eye “I mean, yeah, you were stupid and reckless and I really didn’t like it when you called me Thomas but real hate? I couldn’t really, and about the sleeping around thing…” he looked down for a few seconds before turning his gaze back on Buck, an embarrassed smile accompanying it “I can’t really judge when I used to do the same”

The younger’s eyes were wide open “W-what? How?” 

“Well, there’s something called dating apps, where you—”

“I know what a dating app is Tommy, I just” he exhaled through his nose, a nervous laugh coming out of his mouth “I never thought of you as the type to hookup, not that you couldn’t, I mean… but I just, you seem like such a romantic too”

And he was. Everything about Tommy screamed hopeless romantic.

“Who says you can’t be both?” he let out a short laugh, looking at Buck softly “I’ve always been in love with love I guess, it’s just, after Abby I turned to sex as a sort of self-destructive behavior” Tommy didn’t like to think about that time of his life anymore, the painful realization being too much for him sometimes “I slept with a lot of guys and I mean, a lot, but it never made me feel good or like I deserved to have anything good, it was more like a reminder that I, that I wasn’t allowed to be happy after what I did to her—” whatever he was gonna say next was stopped by the feel of two arms wrapping themselves around him “Evan?”

“I… I’m sorry” the words came like a whisper in his ear, which would make Tommy shiver in any other context but here they were overwhelming him.

“Why are you sorry? You didn’t… You never…”

“I’m sorry you felt that way, Tommy… I know I was a pain in the ass then, and I probably still am” he grinned against the skin of the older’s neck “But you deserve love, you may have hurt people but you are good, Tommy” Buck moved his head back, looking at Tommy deep in the eyes “You are a good person, even if you don’t believe it sometimes”

Tommy wanted to cry, his eyes glistening but not daring to go beyond that. For so long he hated himself so much, and let himself be used to prove that point. One-night stands that made him feel empty, bathroom and alleyway hookups that kept the momentum going, shame overpowering his body. Opening himself to love wasn’t easy, not even with a guy as good as Andy was, but he didn’t want to live in a lie anymore, he didn’t want to let hate burn him from the inside out and consume him.

Tommy gripped Buck’s back, not wanting to let him go just yet “Sometimes I think it’s funny, that my own self-hatred was projected onto many of my relationships, ours included”

Buck arched an eyebrow, intrigued “What do you mean?”

Tommy’s hands left the younger’s back almost as an instinct, feeling a heat reach his cheeks as he pulled away, embarrassment crossing his face “I… okay, don’t laugh please” when Buck reassured him he wasn’t going to he took a deep breath and leaned to take a sip of his beer, pretending it would give him courage “Alright, I… when we met I actually thought you were pretty cute, like I could’ve asked you out kind of cute”

Buck heard the record scratch in his brain, there was nothing else but those words.

‘I thought you were pretty cute’

“And that lasted exactly five seconds until you called me by my name” Tommy hid his face on the back pillows, groaning as his words were muffled by them “I can’t believe I just told you that”

“Tommy, you… you aren’t playing with me, right?” the older looked up, confused at the hitch in Buck’s voice. He looked different, something in him had changed in the way he was looking at Tommy, the older could swear he was seeing a glimmer in his eyes, but shook his head internally, thinking it must be the alcohol.

“No, why would I?”

Buck’s body shifted, his side resting on the back pillows as he leaned closer to Tommy, without invading his space “Okay, this may be funny too but… I sort of got jealous when you told us about Andy”

Tommy tensed up, a million questions popping on his mind as he locked eyes with Buck “Wait, jealous? Why?”

Buck tilted his head, a shy smile appearing on his lips “I… I started to feel like that when you probably started seeing him, y-you changed the way you behaved around me, almost as if… I wasn’t worthy of your time anymore” he remembered how it felt, that strange sensation in his chest the first time Tommy stopped fighting him back, making a passing comment instead “Now I know that’s a stupid way of thinking of course, but, I didn’t realise how much I secretly liked getting your attention”

Tommy looked at him wide-eyed, a thought— a desire crossing his mind “My attention?”

“Yeah I guess so” he chuckled, a soft look in his eyes and a warm grin settling in “I… I was so envious of how easy it was for Andy to get your atten—” suddenly all thoughts were replaced with static when he felt the older’s fingers grab his chin and pull him in.

Tommy was kissing him.

Tommy Kinard was kissing him, on the lips. And Buck was returning it.

It was so gentle and sweet, warmth flowing through their bodies as the few seconds the kiss lasted stretched until it felt like hours, hours none of them wanted to end. Tommy’s hands were in different places, one resting on the younger’s chest while the other landed safely on one of the thighs, simply laying there. Buck’s hands were another story, not knowing where to put them, they gravitate around Tommy’s shoulders tentatively, never landing them anywhere before the kiss broke.

Buck opened his eyes first, looking at Tommy like he was from another planet, and with that a light-switch turned on his brain, a realization with it.

When Tommy’s eyes opened he saw a vision: a pair of glassy blue eyes looking back at him, pink lips agape, and a blush across the cheeks he desperately wanted to kiss now.

“Like that?” his mouth was faster than his head, letting him say things unfiltered.

“Yeah… yeah, that works” Buck was dumbfounded, one phrase crowding everything inside his brain: kiss me, kiss me, kiss me.

Tommy gave him one of his scrunchy smiles, the ones Buck had only seen directed at the older’s ex, and he felt good about it. He felt like he was the object of Tommy’s attention, and that was making him feel giddy inside, yearning to keep that going for as long as the older would want to. Buck got closer, their chest almost brushing the other’s.

“So that was okay?” the older asked, and Buck just wanted to jump him and join their lips again, but he held back even though his skin was itching with want.

“Tommy that was… better than okay, I…” Buck’s brain was officially scrambled, trying so hard to make neural connections and actually work to get the words out “I want to— I need to… God, I can’t think straight” he chuckled, leaning his head on Tommy’s shoulder, who proceeded to sink his fingers into his hair, playing with it. Buck was actually in heaven.

“Metaphorically or literally?” he let out a small laugh when Buck admitted to both, and let him lean back to look into each other’s eyes, Tommy’s hand traveling to cup the younger’s face “Hey”

“Hey”

Tommy nudged their noses together, enjoying the moment without getting to kissing just yet. There was a tenderness in the way he was treating Buck that he had never once tried on him before, and it was giving them whiplash. All the time disliking each other didn’t matter, not when Tommy had just changed Buck’s entire life.

“Tommy…” the neediness in Buck’s voice left the older feeling like all the air was out of his lungs, not knowing how to breathe properly.

“Yes, Evan?” The hitch in Tommy’s voice was making the younger feel like his skin was on fire, desperately wanting the other to put it off.

Buck gave him a peck, and then another, and another one as they leaned on the cushions, Tommy’s head resting on the armrest. Buck deepened the kiss, the feeling of Tommy’s wet tongue driving him to the edge in a matter of seconds, nothing else existing. The younger cupped the older’s face with his hands as the kiss continued, looking more like a makeout session at this point. He bit the other’s lower lip, getting a soft moan out of Tommy.

“I need… I need… more, Tommy, I want more” he said between kisses, and sighed against the older man's mouth when he felt his fingers digging inside his shirt, settling on his waist.

“I want that too, but… Are you sure Evan?” Tommy had to ask, even though he just wanted to have Buck all to himself and touch every inch of his body, a heat settling in his belly.

Buck nodded, a playful smile on his face “I’m sure, I want, I only want you now Tommy” and that did it for him, next thing he knew Buck dived back in, their tongues fighting as the younger started to grind against him, sighing with content.

If there was anything like Heaven, Tommy knew he must be in some version of it. And he was loving it.

[janewayintersection]

the amount of people who are like "omg i ditched kaidan for garrus after he was mean to me on horizon!!" baffle me. shit on bioware's writing for making shep work with cerberus all you want, but kaidan calling shep out on this and not joining them is NOT the issue. in fact, him reacting like this is why i love him??

he specifically states he trusts shep, just not cerberus. which is the only rational response in that whole entire goddamn game!! like?? you spend all of me1 stopping cerberus operations. they kill several alliance soldiers and admiral kahoku, try to make a rachni army -- they are WELL known for cloning and ais... miranda even outright states she wanted to plant shep with a control chip. there is literally zero reason for kaidan to believe the shep in front of him isn't some cerberus sleeper agent. or an ai. or indoctrinated. or being manipulated (THIS ONE IS CANON BTW). even if he trusts shepard, he doesn't trust cerberus not to pull any of this. quite frankly, i'm baffled more companions don't have this exact, entirely justified concern.

loyalty is important, but blind loyalty is dangerous.

honestly, the crew in me2 is lucky that the illusive man was so weirdly and uncharacteristically insistent on shepard remaining untouched. things could have gotten very bad otherwise.

being best friends with someone, or more notably, being in love with someone, isn't the end all be all magic potion in this world. being in love with someone doesn't mean you should blindly trust their actions. if my significant other joined a terrorist group, you can bet my ass i wouldn't join them! sorry! if anything, it's healthy that kaidan has his own sense of morals and priorities he follows over shepard. he's his OWN person, love shouldn't be something that makes you suddenly give up who you are and what you believe in.

not to mention kaidan is entirely out of the loop for the whole game. his intel states that cerberus is behind the abductions (the horizon incident is partially a result of cerberus' fiddling btw), and that shep has been alive and never even reached out to anyone. he doesn't have the information we the players have. he doesn't know that the illusive man insisted on no control chip. he doesn't know about the lazarus project or its specifics.

and as for the "cheating" discourse if you romance someone new in me2, i do personally believe shep getting with one of the me2 love interests is cheating on their me1 love interest. to shep, they skipped those two years. they wake up as they did during the me2 prologue. no time has passed. and then they immediately get with someone else after one (1) argument with their love interest over them, may i remind you, joining a terrorist group. even if you don't think it's "technically" cheating, it's at the very least pretty trashy and flakey.

if anything, i'm gonna say it! kaidan is more forgiving than i'd be! the fact that he even sends an email saying he still cares and that they can see what happens after this is all resolved is WAY more than i would have done. the fact that kaidan will find out shep got with someone else, and STILL be willing to give shep a chance is like. man. it's saying a lot. i am just saying.

imagine losing someone. you see them literally die as your ship explodes and they burn up in the nearby planet's atmosphere. you grieve. you put yourself into your work. then suddenly, two years, later. they pop back up again. ALIVE. and with a terrorist group. and basically tell you the equivalent of "just trust me bro" despite the fact that while you trust them, you don't trust the terrorist group. so you're like hey, what the fuck. why are you with a terrorist group. and they're like i'm not with them, we just have common goals. and you're like. i'm gonna say it again. i trust you, not the terrorist group. okay?? i can't join you for this reason. please be careful out there, seriously.

and then they immediately jump into the pants of that one guy you knew back on a mission from two years ago.

what would you do?? would you not feel hurt? betrayed? upset? confused?? i'm sorry, i'm completely on kaidan's side. i'd go as far to say that he's far more understanding than he should be in me2.

me3 is all about regaining that complete and undying trust back, and that cerberus didn't fuck around w shep. or that being with cerberus didn't change them. his "loyalty" quest is just visiting him in the hospital and showing him shepard still cares. that they're still the same. that cerberus truly didn't alter them. that there was more going on. that shepard was forced to work with cerberus out of complete necessity and only did what they thought was right. and i think that's neat!!!!

[youaremycosmo]

《Too good to be true》 taemin x reader scenario

Taemin as the most-loving-cute-affectionate husband&dad nothing else to add enjoy!

cr. for the photos: Jjakgoongie Word count// 2,051 words Pairing// Taemin x you

Summary// Cute moments with Taemin as parents of newborn baby girl, Taerinnie. (btw Taemin would make endless jokes when you call him Tae, showing with his daughter and asking 'what?' in the same time as they both share the same syllabe in names XD)

Genre// fluff

Warnings// talking about lactation, if you don't like pregnancy/ parenthood scenarios just don't read this ^^

MASTERLIST You stirred in your sleep, absent-mindedly searching for Taemin who was supposed to lay in the bed next to you. He was usually there, that’s why you groaned under your breath and opened your eyes slightly, not feeling the familiar source of warmth next to you.

The bedding on his side was a little messy, which made you push yourself up on your hands, looking around. Light from the corridor streamed into the room through the slightly opened door, making you sure Tae hadn’t gone to the restroom.

You were so tired from getting up every two hours that you just put your head back on the pillow, with strong determination to wait until your husband come back. Then you wanted to just lock him into a bear hug and try to get some rest again. However, Taem didn't show up for a while, which forced you to finally get up from the bed.

You frowned as the light hit your eyes, sensitive from the darkness and took careful steps around the apartment. You catched a glimpse of your daughter’s room, sensing it could be the first place where Taemin went.

Taerinnie was born seven days ago, and your entire lives had been subordinated solely to her from the first moment. Your and Taem’s little sunshine needed a lot of care, which, combined with the exhaustion of pregnancy and childbirth, meant that you felt completely worn out all the time. Not to mention stress from being fledgling parents, afraid of every single thing happening around her.

Taemin, on the other hand, seemed filled with energy like never before. Smile never left his face, no matter how little he slept and how much he took over your household chores. Additionally, he never forgot to take care of you as well, praising you at least a few times a day. It seemed as if the expansion of your little family had practically given him wings, and you weren't surprised at all. As long as you could remember, for Tae there was always the right time to get married and have a baby, although seeing you didn't share his opinion, he never pressured you into anything.

You leaned carefully against the doorstep, noticing Taem sitting in your nursing chair with baby Taerin in his arms. You could only see a fragment of his profile, but clearly observe your little daughter, dressed in cute rompers and wrapped carefully in a light pink blanket. Her eyes, huge and dark, stared constantly at Taemin, and her adorable cheeks moved continuously as she sucked on the pacifier.

- Everything’s fine now, right? - a loving and warm voice broke the silence. - Did you just need a hug? It's okay, mommy and daddy will cuddle you as much as you want - he purred, rocking her delicately.

You smiled tenderly at the sight. There were times where you could see him taking care of children and how well he did it. But when it came to Taerin, he was simply the best dad you could imagine. Tae seemed to have infinite patience and enormous amounts of love, pouring it on his long-awaited daughter at every possible moment.

- We can't wake up mom every time, okay? - his fingertip touched her cute, tiny nose. - Mommy is very tired because she's feeding you and needs some sleep... But daddy can also take care of many things - Taemin’s voice sounded utterly satisfied. - You and I are a good team too - he chuckled softly to himself. You could see his cheeks lift into a smile as he stroked her little face gently, like a porcelain doll’s.

Taerinnie's eyes were becoming heavier and heavier each second, opening with difficulty, but she still listened calmly to what her dad had to tell her.

- How on earth did I deserve an angel like you, hmm? - Tae whispered pensively - I always thought that being with your mommy was like a dream come true, then I couldn't believe that mommy married me, and now… there’s you… I always knew you would be the most beautiful baby in the world, after all, you got it from y/n... She was so pretty when I fell in love with her, but why does she seem more gorgeous every day? - he titled his head a bit.

You felt as your cheeks flushed, and suddenly you felt shy standing there and listening to all of it. Taemin was always full of love, as if it was the first year of your relationship.

- You are like my two princesses... And I’m the one who loves you to death -Taem chuckled under his breath - Do you feel like sleeping already? - he asked, probably noticing how Taerinnie's eyelids finally drooped and her face became completely calm and carefree.

- Sleep well, you have to grow a lot - he pressed his lips on her forehead, observing her tiny body for a longer moment.

You moved away from the door, seeing him rise to put Taerinnie in her cradle. He made sure everything was fine, then turned off the light, carefully leaving the room.

- Oh, are you awake? - he asked, noticing you, obviously surprised.

- I woke up because you weren't in bed - you admitted cutely, walking up to Tae and just cuddling into him tightly.

- Taerinnie cried again - he explained himself and smiled fondly at your gesture, his arms embracing you strongly. - I decided not to wake you up because she didn't need to be fed... And we somehow managed to calm down on our own - Taemin said with satisfaction in his voice, and you glanced at him with a wide smile.

However, your eyes immediately went to the ends of his long hair that curled outwards. You reached for them carefully. - Taeminnie, your wings seem to be showing again - you muttered, teasing him a bit.

- Ah, come on -  he rolled his eyes with pink shade coming to his cheeks. He reached his hands to your thighs and lifted you up. - This baby needs to sleep too - he purred lovingly, carrying you to the bed.

You let him make you comfortable on the pillow and cover you thoroughly with the duvet before he laid down next to you. His arms pulled you completely to him, leaving little space, and you could feel his warm breath near your ear.

Before closing your eyes, you tried to adjust your nursing bra a little, annoyed at having to wear it all the time. You couldn’t help but sighed loudly when you saw a small wet spot on your t-shirt. Actually, it was his piece of pajamas as you loved wearing it to sleep.

- I can't deal with this, really - you mumbled under your breath. You rolled up the fabric and struggled to correct the pads, which allowed you to forget, at least for a moment, about the way your breasts leaked milk at the slightest touch. Your body changes were quite hard for you to accept, maybe because Taemin seemed to be doing better than ever and despite passing years, he was still so handsome and hot.

- I need to change - you decided, trying to get up, but his hands didn’t let you do it, keeping you in place.

- Stay, don’t mind it - Taem asked in a low voice, his thumbs rubbing your side soothingly. - You'll still be getting up to feed Taerin - he added, and the tone of his voice suddenly became more worried. - Is it still the same?

- I think as long as I continue to breastfeed, it’ll look like this - you grumbled, clearly uneasy. - It's just... instead of a wife, you're hugging a cow at this moment - you tried to joke, chuckling hesitantly.

Taemin, however, wasn’t amused. - Don't talk about yourself like that - he chastened you in a serious tone. - You are still the most beautiful woman in the world. The most charming person I know. The sexiest one too - his hand slid slowly to your hip, which had been noticeably more rounder for several months now. - It's just… you smell… sweeter - he murmured affectionately, snuggling closer to you.

You gave him a side glance. - You're weird, you know that? - you cracked up at this unusual compliment. 

Taem raised his head from the pillow, obviously outraged. - I'm just stating a fact, it's not weird - he hissed, lying down again immediately. 

- Like asking if you can try my breast milk, not weird at all - you teased him, closing your eyes. 

- Making sure Taerinnie likes it isn't weird either - Tae replied with confidence, but you could hear a slight laugh in his voice.

A comfortable silence fell between you as you tried to rest, knowing in the back of your mind that you’ll be woken up by crying again in an hour or two.

- I'm sorry -  his thoughtful whisper echoed in your ear, making you gently open your eyes. - I know... it's difficult for you and... well, I was the one who wanted to have a baby of the two of us, and the reality is you're the one who has to deal with everything...

- It was our mutual decision - you interrupted him, speaking without doubt. - You just wanted it earlier, but that doesn't mean you wanted to have a baby more than I did.

- Well, yes... - he sounded inconsolable. - But... I guess… I didn't really know what it would look like... I see how tired you are. I wish I could take at least half of this stuff from you, but I can't…- the tip of his nose rubbed your cheek. 

You decided to pull away slightly to look at him. - You actually do a lot of things to help me - you assured, looking into his concerned eyes. - And I'm grateful, really grateful, because I have your greatest support - you reached your hand to his cheek, stroking it tenderly.

- But... you're so damn tired  - he stated the obvious, biting his upper lip gently.

You smiled fondly and closed the space between yours and Tae’s lips, pecking them sweetly. Currently, you didn't even have the strength to kiss each other more passionately, so your affection was limited only to hugging and rather innocent kisses.

- I'm so damn tired, and I love you both so damn much - you admitted with amusement.

- Hey, how could you say something like that to Taerinnie…? - he groaned indignantly. - What example are you going to give if you swear like that?

You rolled your eyes, taking a deep breath. - Okay, then I love you so damn much, and my love for Taerinnie is immeasurable - you muttered, annoyed by his comment. - Better?

- Better - Taem replied, satisfied with this answer.

- You actually have one task, one thing - you pointed your finger at him.

- What is this? - he stared at you with curious eyes. 

- Just try to look for a younger girl without stretch marks and breasts that don't leak milk all the time, I'll strangle you - you threatened him, and Taemin bursted out into laugh.

- Ah, what are you talking about? - he whined loudly. - They're beautiful... just... - he tried to wrap his hand around them gently, but you hit it.

- No touching - you reminded him.

- No touching - he repeated with a mischievous smile, pecking your cheek.- I… just…  kind of look forward to having them back…

You rubbed your eyelids with your fingers, trying not to laugh.

- Not only are you an idiot, you're also perverted - you commented, glancing at him again.

- Pff, if I weren't perverted, you wouldn't have such a little cute daughter  - he kissed the side of your head a few times and corrected himself on the pillow. - I love you…- he murmured, making sure it came out as loveable as it could.

- I love you too - you answered tiredly, slowly falling asleep in the safest embrace of this world.

[fuwaprince]

HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP PLEASE

Hi everybody, how are we doing? I hope you're enjoying the beginning of fall. Now that I'm done just being hospitable, can I just be honest? Can I vent? Can I be heard? Am I allowed to express my hurt? Can I please request for aid?

I am struggling to all hell. On and off the streets and been homeless since June 1st. I don't need resource information- I need immediate relief in the form of financial support. My partner and I are doing our best to be strong but being strong does not help when we're in the position where we're lucky just to eat, or do laundry. Over this summer I have been robbed of my possessions (cards, clothes, cash, toiletries, my phone... all of which I struggled to get to begin with). I have been sexually assaulted and put through violent situations. Detained because people LIED and I guess that means guilty until proven innocent. Woke up undressed for reasons unbenounced to me in a house fire surrounded by flames and SOMEHOW, unfortunately survived. Somehow contracted a disease that has no fucking cure. I have reached out to EVERYONE I KNOW BEGGING FOR HELP. I have taken so much shit in exchange for the smallest amount of help, for food, for access to medical attention or a shower or for privacy. I have been homeless with a 103 degree fucking fever that lasted for days and got no help because I was too sick to move. I crawled to a shower and sat on the floor hoping my brain wouldn't melt (which it begins to at such temperatures btw). All this did not happen because I'm "lazy" or "a bad woman".

I am a woman presenting person who probably should have just been born in the right body or into the right wealthy ass family. I am in my 20s. I have been told I would make a great prostitute but I wasn't even made for of- nor am I interested. My abusive ass neglectful ass family are not helping me through my situation and my mom tells me I deserve it so that she doesn't have to cry while listening to me explain how bad things have gotten. I have a stab wound on my neck. I have burns on my body. I did not put those there myself. How could anybody deserve any of that? How could anybody do nothing to help? How can you just look at me and pessimistically say, "good luck". Or give the apathetic and unhelpful "me too" response.

My partner lost his dog after the fire. Can you imagine having to pretend like that doesn't matter because you have to worry about food? Can you imagine trying to provide emotional support because red cross never called back after you requested for health services? When your school says they can't help you because it's out of the budget???? "LIMITED FUNDS" they say. I was on the Dean's honor roll for TWO semesters in a row, almost close to getting my BA (just a few classes away). I was a student leader. UNTIL I had to finally say fuck that shit and drop. I have enough credits to graduate but I do not see how the fuck I'm going to survive until 2025.

I need help! Please help? Words of encouragement are appreciated but please help me raise enough for a down payment for a car to live in. That is what I'm asking for, at least for winter. I would like an apartment but California is so outrageous with prices, all I can hope for realistically is a car. Anything would help. Nothing is expected.

Please rb this post, if you can, it helps.

Always remember to maintain your humanity and that love persists.

Garlic haters DNI

my paypal is @garyanne

[emelinstriker]

Macaque ♡ Private Play

I can't help but imagine Macaque using his Shadow Play skills to get money- now imagine the reader, his lovely spouse, being a regular of his shows and boom :D

Pre-Shadow Play episode btw cuz he do kinda be needing that lamp still

The pain of having to write this level of wholesome fluff when you've never been in an actual romantic relationship yourself- So I had a lot more fun telling the tale at the end and making it all more dramatic- omegalul

♡ ~ Fluff ~ ♡

It was yet another night at the theater, and a certain shadow monkey was doing his usual routine of retelling tales that he knew of from his own perspective and memories. Nothing out of the ordinary happened of course. He didn't get many people to see his performance, as usual, due to his plays' times and because of people not usually being interested in the concept of shadow plays as they preferred movies.

Such a shame, really, they were missing out on a great show! At least that's what you thought everytime you would see only a portion of the audience seats having been filled. Your husband did such an amazing show and you would be awestruck each and every time at the visuals he was able to create. Not to mention, his soothing voice was a nice bonus no matter which tale he told. He even used his powers to spice up your private wedding a few years back, using his shadows to calm you down from your nervous high, as well as putting on a shadow play for the few guests you had.

Once the play you were currently watching was over, you and the other people in the audience clapped, delighted at the performance. Some even stood up while the demon man on the stage bowed at the applause.

It didn't take long for the last people to leave the room while you simply sat in your reserved VIP seat as usual. And it didn't take long for your shadow to become a portal for the hooded monkey either as he emerged from it, wrapping his arms around you from behind.

"Hey there, sugarplum, how was work?", he said while nuzzling the crook of your neck. He was still in his human disguise, so unfortunately you were unable to appreciate his fluffy fur. But that didn't make you appreciate him any less as you leaned back into his hold.

You actually showed him your workplace before, which is a rather small thrift shop. Macaque needed some human clothing because the red and black cloak he's using during his plays would not suffice in certain areas of the city. Him in a hooded cloak, being all dark and mysterious, would most certainly garner unwanted attention from demons and humans alike. That's when you showed him some stylization options. Everything you showed him was extremely casual and he loved it.

"It was alright. Not much happened today, besides one customer who didn't understand how a warranty works", you muttered. The monkey let out a low chuckle as you could feel his chest's vibration on your back, leaning further into you. "Anyway, once you're free we can go take a stroll. There's this new 24-hour shop we haven't been to yet." Finally, you decided to turn a bit to give him a quick peck on the lips, making him smirk.

"Well, you're in luck. This one just so happened to be my last play for the night. Just gotta clockout at the counter and we're off", he said as he removed his disguise with his ability, revealing his demon form. He was still wearing his hooded cloak however, nuzzling you with his fur now.

And as he said, he clocked out at the counter... Or rather a shadow clone did while he himself carried you bridal-style outside the theater and onto the dark streets. He didn't let go of you until you were in the darkness of an alleyway, embraced by the shadows. You knew he specifically did this to make you feel safer. Because something he told you early on into your relationship: 'You're a lot safer in the shadows. So don't be afraid of them, especially when I'm here.'

The two of you walked hand-in-hand down the alley, talking about whatever else happened at each of your respective workplaces. Apparently the theater had a major fangirl come in who couldn't stop squealing at Macaque's voice, overall mysterious demeanor, as well as shadow abilities.

You laughed a bit at the image of a random girl in the back of the audience having a fangirl meltdown. "She did stay behind after the play to ask me for my number. Of course I said no and showed her my ring, but can you believe that?" He rolled his eyes at the memory.

"Yes, I can believe that would've happened eventually. After all," you started as you made your shoulder bump into his in an affectionate manner, "you do have an irresistible charm on the character you're putting up while in disguise."

You could've sworn his tail wagged underneath his cloak from the faint movement of fabric your eyes were able to catch behind him, giving you an amused smile. He pouted at your word choice.

"Just while in disguise? Damn, guess I'll need to step up my game as amazing husband to top that character", he chuckled before pulling down his hood. "How about I top the 'mysterious storyteller' right now with a tale I know you'll love?"

You simply stared at him in awe before excitedly nodding your head to give him the 'go'. In response, he let go of your hand and pulled out his lantern from underneath his cloak, twirling it in a fluent motion before it abruptly stopped and lit up in all its purple glory. He then winked as he handed it to you for safekeeping before taking a few steps back towards the opposing wall.

Macaque used both his hands and body to make the shadows behind him move in the usual shadow play fashion you knew from his public plays. Despite being fully aware of his abilities, knowing he doesn't need to do such thing to create those visuals, you appreciated his need to be a bit more dramatic than necessary. It simply added a bit more flare to the experience and made it a lot more enjoyable. But this time he actually incorporated his tail into the play too.

He started out with his eyes closed and his hands behind his back, using his smooth voice to his advantage, "Welcome my loveliest viewer, to a shadow play. The likes of which have never been seen." The simian's eyes opened as he threw a loving glance at you before raising his hand to the night sky. His arm's shadow formed a monkey man behind him. You knew that was him from his previous plays.

"The tale follows up on a warrior's story told not so long ago... There was a lonely warrior, wandering the most darkest corners of an unknown town. Cast aside by his former source of light, the hero, he sought out to find another source to feel whole once more", he started as his shadow now depicted himself and Sun Wukong. The Monkey King seemed to vanish as if turned to dust before being blown away by the wind. Macaque's expression held a sliver of hatred, but was quickly replaced with a gentle smile as another memory resurfaced.

"One day while roaming the town in the dead of night, a thunderstorm approached. Desperate to find shelter, he came across a different kind of light. A light so powerful, its source did not seem to mind sharing it with everyone they met." His eyes dilated a bit as he turned to face you, seeing you hold onto his lantern with extra care, making sure not to block its light. You didn't even notice your own lovestruck smile until he smiled back. "That light was a generous and kind mortal human, who offered him their home to shield him from the cold and damp. They even offered him silent comfort from the sounds outside as lightning continued to strike."

The shadows now depicted a human holding their hands over the warrior's ears, making both gaze at one another in close proximity. Then it switched to a scene with both holding hands while looking at what could only be described as sunrise.

"As the storm faded into the night, so did the moon. The sun started to awaken as its rays made the warrior realize that this human was his new source of light. And yet he told himself he had to leave, for he did not feel worthy of their compassion." The shadow of the warrior let go of the light's hands, but then was quickly stopped by the light refusing to let go of one hand, lightly tugging him back towards them.

"However, the light proved him otherwise. They did not agree with his mindset and instead asked him to stay longer." The human now pulled the warrior closer to them before giving him a hug. Macaque couldn't help but let out a little chuckle as he recalled the memory. "And eventually, the warrior seemed to have been put under a spell so strong it sent him into a spiraling trance. One that would bind him to the light for the future to come." Your husband then slightly leaned closer in your direction with his signature grin. "It was a spell of love."

The scene shifted once more to show both of them kissing while sitting on a bench under a tree, one familiar one you recognized with ease. "Over the coming months, their love for one another grew, and so did the shadow's courage to propose marriage to his beloved light. He came up with a plan to meet up under the tree's branches once again, and he expressed his devotion to the loving light of his life..."

Suddenly, the lantern became dimmer by the second as he approached your now blushing form with his arms crossed, clearly hearing your heartbeat. "I believe you already know how this story ends."

And as the lantern's light faded away, you launched yourself forward to capture him in your embrace, giving him a passionate kiss on the lips. You were still holding onto the lantern with one hand behind his back. He wrapped his arms around you in return and leaned more into you. Once you pulled away for air, you gave him a bright smile as a few tears formed in your eyes from the joy you felt. Despite the dark that surrounded you two, the simian was able to see your happy response to his small, private play. Macaque knew how to pick his words far too well.

"You dork... I love you, Mac", your mumbled voice said as you nuzzled your face into his chest. His lips made contact with the top of your head as he pulled you closer to him, letting out what sounded like a low purr.

"I love you too, sugarplum."

> Link to Masterlist <

[secondratefiction]

Hi there! Hope you’re doing well! Kicking that funeral services degree’s ass with any luck!! I was wondering if you would be up to writing a drabble for Jason or Tim (whoever you think fits the scenario best) as the boyfriend of a law student. Maybe where they’re living together and she’s just barely getting 3-5 hours of sleep a night while trying to study for finals, writing a full legal brief, practicing for oral arguments, getting ready for her summer associateship, and applying for moot court and law review. (Is this based on some poor law student’s real life? We may never know!) And just like her needing someone to be there and take care of her, but also her wanting to take care of him too even though she is very much Trying Her Best to Survive™? (Btw thank you so much for blessing us with batfam content galore, absolute ICON <3 )

Oh good lord… bless you and this ‘hypothetical’ poor law student. I know my degree is kicking my ass all across the state and back, so I can only imagine… They keep telling me the degrees are worth it… we’ll ride it out and see. Good vides, and better times love 💜

—

Now I fully believe that Timmy would be wonderful at this in his own right… but every single thing about this request violently screams Jason Todd to me…

There are only so many hours and so many spoons in a day, and unfortunately a law degree takes up almost every single ounce of both of them

However, Jason has this innately ingrained need to take care of the people that matter to him, so this is exactly where he shines

He was always Alfred’s best protege, so the man cooks and cleans house like a pro. Not only that, but it’s something that he genuinely enjoys because they are simple and repetitive tasks that let zone out and go through the motions to decompress from his ‘other job’.

While he’s happy to take care of all of that and leave you to focus on the proverbial, ever-growing mountain of work you have - He’s not above making you stop to take a break.

It is not an uncommon occurrence for this man to literally close your laptop, throw you over his shoulder*, and haul you out to the kitchen table to sit down and have a meal with him.

((*I do not care what size you are, or what hang ups you might have about your weight, if this man can hold up a collapsing ceiling, he can carry you across y’alls apartment))

“Ok, I have physically seen you putting food and water into your body, you can go back to your cave now.”

This happens at least 2-3 times a week

He is concerned. Just humor him and let him love you.

Jason is 100% the type to be actively learning from anything you tell him

Some nights, when the insomnia and the nightmares decide to double team him, he’ll even sit up browsing through your textbooks just to try and understand everything you're doing more.

Tim get’s labeled the nerd of the family a lot, but really Jason would have been the family scholar if he’d had the chance

The second bedroom in your apartment is both your office and his library. That shit is floor to ceiling.

With that in mind he is always more than happy to be a sounding board when you need him to. Listen to what you’ve got, argue the other side if necessary

Dear god, just know what you’re getting into there… he lives for that kind of stuff, and he will come prepared. This is one of his all time favorite games, that comes second only to aggravating the living shit out of you (which, if he’s lucky, will be a bonus here)

95% of the time, Jason has got this, got you - focus on your school babe, I’ll take care of it… but that 5%? That bit where he’s not actually infallible? He so very desperately doesn’t want you to see that.

What you’re doing is important, and he doesn’t want the fact he had a rough night to be a distraction for you. This is where you enter a bit of a balancing act…

As much as you may want to put everything aside and take care of him, that is the fastest way to make him shut down.

Instead, grab a textbook and a highlighter. Go ‘make yourself some tea’ and pour him a mug too. Set everything up in the living room and drag him onto the couch with you.

Put his head in your lap, and just run your fingers through his hair while you do some reading.

Bonus points if you put a blanket over him

Poor baby is gonna melt in an instant and be out cold before you know it. Just keep playing with his hair and let him sleep.

And do not mention it if he is emotional when he wakes up… he’s never going to be good/get used to receiving love and affection. Do it anyway, and don’t make a big deal about it.

[radioroxx]

hi pluto i’m here to ask if u have any isat headcanons. about anybody! hope u have a good sunday :))

HAPPY SUNDAY VIA can i call you via. hello

ive mentioned my tattoo hcs before but im gonna expand on them as best i can rn because i think about it occasionally (i am making a lot of this up. right now! for you!)

ok so odile has a lower back tattoo she got in her 20s and i feel very strongly about this one 1. because i think its funny 2. because it makes her 10x cooler. the other day in my moots disc we talked about the idea of odile having a past polycule that she broke off from and so ive adopted that idea and decided the tattoo is a matching one. she does not regret it at all and is still (somewhat) in touch with her ex’s. siffrin was the first person she told about this, drunkenly btw, and for months afterwards he couldnt remember if it was Actually Real or just something his brain made up (and they were too scared to ask lol)

siffrin has star tattoos on his back and shoulders! i was considering giving him sleeves but i changed my mind,, he got them while he was still travelling on his own. possibly theres a region that is more well known for tattooing (havent decided what this would be though)! he was interested from a ‘learning about new culture’ perspective, also just because Why Not. he chose to get stars because it felt right. he somewhat regrets it. (maybe, post canon and later on their journey, he would try out something else. different designs. things inspired by his family! or things he wants to remember)

isabeau has no tattoos. not from not wanting them, but from just never really having the interest. UNTIL travelling with the party. until staying up late with sif in their shared tent and finding out that, on his travels, he learned how to (very basically) give people tattoos. and begs him for one. its like 2am and neither of them are thinking clearly so they agree. they ‘borrow’ odiles ink pot she uses for writing, a sewing needle that isa happens to have on hand, aaaand it. goes very poorly. as youd imagine. he is lucky to have the long sleeves to cover it up. whatever design theyd been going for was absolutely not achieved. but! he cherishes the memories regardless. (incredibly, they would try this twice. the second time would be after bonnie joined the crew, who would catch them awake, beg siffrin for a tattoo of their own, be told ‘no’, but would still be allowed to watch as long as they PROMISE not to tattle to madame and mira in the morning. bonnie absolutely tattles).

mira! does not seem like a tattoo person to me. i think she would be intimidated by the idea- partially in relation to the change belief, partially because she wouldnt know what to get. i like to think tattoos are probably pretty controversial to the religion… some people think they are a very powerful form of change! something you cant take back. others disagree for the same reason, that its permanent. so pre canon no tattoos for her. but!! but! as i mentioned before with siffrin getting tattoos for his family, i think mira might consider something as well (confidence boosted by the fact that the others will be matching). other than that though, it just doesnt appeal to her much.

bonnie has no tattoos also aaand it will stay that way for. a little bit. this is something that upsets them greatly because i also like to believe that nille has PLENTY of tattoos! possibly some she even got when she was much much younger! irresponsibly, of course, and many of them are regrettable. so she steers bonnie away from making that same mistake too young (tries to encourage them to wait until they are 18 at least). maybe bambouche as a whole is a very tattoo-supportive town, which is where bonnie got their interest. this does not stop them from making little paintings up their arms and having the others help out as well, to make up for it, in a non-permanent way.

i havent actually designed what any of their tattoos would look like… thats gotta be something i sit down to think about,,, one day maybe ehe

[transraptortrainer]

I'll speak to specifically the trauma of them losing Brooklynn to a dinosaur !!

Kenji obviously became extremely avoidant which I think was perpetuated by a lot of trauma he experienced just dealing with the dad stuff. It's not easy for him to talk about his feelings or address them directly, and I think he knew he'd be hurtful to Darius - someone he really cares about - if he saw him again after Brooklynn's funeral, which is why he dropped contact with him and the others. He didn't want to hurt his brother but he needed space and a lot of time to heal from what had happened. That being said I don't think he would've ever broken that silence if it wasn't for Darius showing up on his door.

Darius isolated, and as he's always done, he blamed himself. Darius has suffered from survivor's guilt even since his father passed. It's never been easy for him to move on or forgive himself. But he also became a bit obsessive, and knowing that there was originally this plot for Darius to just hate dinosaurs because of the event was passed around in early screenings of season 1 is soo much but it really indicates how much Brooklynn's death meant to him. He couldn't view dinosaurs through the same passionate lense he always did. I think that is extremely representative of his feelings.

Similarly to Darius, Ben also became obsessive in a different kind of way...? Idk if anyone's noticed that his anxiety has kinda evolved into a what appears to me as a kind of paranoia disorder , which. Same queen I get it. He even went as far as to consider his friend Sammy may have been involved! He admits he had to rule out all possibilities which I can only imagine made him feel incredibly guilty. I think he also had to detach, probably mostly because the event caused a split in his friend group. He's become extremely self-reliant but his disorders are manifesting in fun and interesting new ways LOL.

Sammy copes through keeping busy. Obviously. I wouldn't be surprised if this is somehow related to the fact her family decided to end contact with her. But btw can we talk about how much that must've been the straw that broke the camel's back? We know family is the most important thing in the world to Sammy. Not only did she lose her family, but her camp fam haven't been together in 6 months and it's broken her heart. But she keeps busy. She cooks, she cleans, she cares for bumpy. She tries to do anything but think about what's happened to her.

For yaz.. well she's the only one actively receiving therapy. So she's coping. I would bet she thought about quitting therapy and school to support Sammy after everything happened but Sammy refused to let this happen. Yaz is very pragmatic and probably fell into a mindset once or twice that something like this was only bound to happen eventually...Yasmina seemed maybe the least effected by the loss and I think that's probably entirely because she was actively speaking about the trauma and working through it with a support group on the island. Love you girl.....

[wuxiaphoenix]

Headcanon: Kabane

First off, if you haven’t seen Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress, I highly recc’ it. Despite the kabane it’s a monster apocalypse, not a zombie apocalypse. We all know monsterapocs give main characters much better survival chances than zpocs. Yes, gore, horror elements, some horrible deaths, but our good guys never give up. Not easy, when you’re up against hordes of kabane.

BTW, the etymology on that name is interesting. The Japanese word for “dead body” is shikabane. Leave off the shi for death, and... you have a body that is Not Dead.

Canon evidence supports this. Kabane breathe. They bleed. They have (sometimes visible) heartbeats. They respond to what they see, mimicking people’s actions if they aren’t attacking in a bloodthirsty frenzy. They are, in short, living creatures aware of themselves and their surroundings, even if they appear to have taken over dead human bodies.

“Appear to” being the operative phrase. We see through the episodes that every body that revives was bitten/infected before death. (Or in one specific case, shortly after, but I haven’t seen the Battle of Unato myself.) The point being that the majority of the body’s organs would be still alive when the kabane gets it breathing again. In particular, the heart.

To kill a kabane, you have to destroy the heart. To prevent a body from rising as a kabane, you have to destroy the heart. Both of which are best done with shaped charges, because even before an infected person dies the kabane may have formed its iron cage, making ordinary weapons... ineffective.

Now we get into headcanon and speculation. Warning, there be spoilers (and weird biology) here!

You may be wondering if the kabane are an unprecedented monster. Zombies! Black smoke/fused colonies! Surely there’s nothing in nature that acts and feeds as a mob of individuals, then gathers into one massive form to travel to new hunting grounds?

Yes. There is. We call it a slime mold.

Now, slime molds aren’t psychokinetic, they don’t create iron cages, and they don’t break back apart into individuals once they’ve formed their “slug”. But they do have chemicals to order individual cells to “group together”, which would fit neatly with the “black blood” in canon. Inventing “white blood”, a chemical to split everything back into individuals again, is just a step of SF farther; justified by kabane being actual different bodies instead of single cells. Also various slime molds can be parasites (though mostly of plants) carried through liquids or spores if they land in an appropriately moist place. This fits well with being bite-spread (saliva to blood) or some unlucky souls getting infected through an open wound or scratch without getting bitten.

Now let’s get into the Stargate stuff. Ma’chello warning here!

(Yes, he deserves his own warning. Fridge Horror at the very least.)

Ma’chello, in the eps we see him or his influence, has the main goal of wiping out the System Lords. To that end he produced... various not at all ethical things, including a device that switched people’s minds between bodies and wouldn’t switch them back, and a page-turner infested with parasitic creations that targeted Goa’uld and drove anyone who wasn’t carrying a Goa’uld crazy. Apparently the better for them to encounter a System Lord or Jaffa and pass on the parasite. You can imagine for yourselves what was likely to happen to someone having a psychotic fit near a System Lord. We know the page turners were found in a sealed room that had dead bodies who had been a group of Goa’uld... and we can deduce their symbiotes were killed, and then the suddenly freed hosts couldn’t get out through the door that required System Lord tech to open from the inside, and died of thirst.

So. Yeah. Ma’chello... while apparently an unparalleled weapons-crafter, doesn’t really get human or animal behavior, and is exactly the kind of guy to find or create something that will wipe out Goa’uld and blithely let it loose without regard for the consequences to anyone else.

Consider if he found something kind of like a slime mold. (Kind of like army ants too, more on that later.) Probably an alien parasite/predator of alien animals, no interest in humans at all, originally. Infects something frog-oid, or rabbitish, or what have you. Takes out the higher brain, creates a new brain for itself by infecting the heart neurons (yes, those exist, look up sensory neurites), and protects that new brain with some kind of internal “skeleton” cage. Spreads and feeds, and when prey grow thin on the ground and hibernation isn’t enough to keep them from starving, all the individuals ball together as a lumpy, mildly psychokinetic beastoid like ants creating a bridge out of their own bodies, that crosses long distances and falls back apart in a fresh hunting ground.

Ma’chello would love this. The original critters wouldn’t be that smart, so he’d think unaffected humans could easily take them down. And the kabane infection, from what we can observe, kills almost all of the brain, and would definitely kill the Goa’uld in the process. Or it would, if Goa’uld didn’t usually destroy just about all parasites and diseases in their host.

Well, he has a way to get around that! Just tweak it so that “skeleton” makes a kind of biological equivalent to naquadah, which the System Lords have engineered their own biology to not attack. It probably wouldn’t even take much tweaking; you simply cannot get that much life-sustaining calories and “iron” from just blood, they have to be creating both of them somehow. (Also it can’t be iron and stop bullets to the heart, the physics doesn’t work. It has to be something nastier.) Weird alien fusion? Who knows. They’re doing it, it can be tweaked to do even more exotic things.

...Are you getting a Bad Feeling About This? Good.

Tomorrow: Unintended Consequences.

[chloesolace]

False God - Patron!Raphael x Warlock!Reader

summary: Raphael has been your patron for quite a while, yet you have always tried to avoid him as much as you could. He has somehow always intimidated you, while you tried to block out your growing attraction to him. It certainly doesn't help that you seem to be his favorite client. When he catches you inside the House of Hope archive, tired from having studied a tome all day, he decides to finally give in to the tension between you and help you release some of it, too.

pairing: Raphael x reader

word count: 3.8k

warnings: smut with devil form, penetration, Raphael has a lil crush on you

a/n: Part of my Swift series, where I write one shots inspired by Taylor's songs. This one is based on the song of the same name <3 and btw, I think we all are kind of ignoring the canon when it comes to Raphael fics.... right? I'm thinking of making this into an actual fanfiction (the patron x warlock thing). Lmk if this is something you'd be interested in. Please also remember I'm asexual so pls excuse any mistakes with the smut!!

Masterlist - Discord Server - Request Info - Taylor Swift Series

Hell is when I fight with you But we can patch it up good Make confessions and we're begging for forgiveness Got the wine for you

The smell of sulfur invaded your nostrils as you entered through the large, heavy door, held open for you by two damned souls, their expressions void of emotion. You had long grown accustomed to them, but some still managed to send shivers down your spine when you looked at them: their empty eyes, as if made of cold glass, their sunken mouths, and their bruised limbs showcasing the labor they were damned to perform for all eternity.

You did not often imagine yourself in their stead, but you could not deny that the voices that had warned you against making a deal with a cambion ghosted through your mind at times. Mostly at night, when everything was quiet, and you had nothing to drown out your thoughts.

Sometimes, you even had nightmares, though you would never admit to it. They were frightening in ways a mere broken contract could not cause; a mirror of your soul, and deepest desires. You knew better than to talk about it, even though you sometimes felt like he could smell them nonetheless.

Your steps echoed through the foyer, your gaze fixed on the path before you as you tried to tune out what was happening around you. Erratic whispers and aimless gazes followed you as you made your way to the feast hall, the smell of freshly cooked food replacing the stench of sulfur in your nose. The table was eternally set, and the food would never spoil.

Without giving it much thought, you walked past it until you reached the archive, a place where you spent most of your time whenever you visited the House of Hope, as rare as those occasions might have been. He had offered you the use of some artifacts and books, but you had always felt a sense of dread when you entered his House. And then there was of course the boudoir, which you avoided like the plague. You knew what was behind that door, unfortunately. It was hard to visit the House of Hope at least two times and not know about Haarlep. It was a thorn in your side for reasons that flustered you when you did as much as think of them.

Focusing on the book you came for, you entered the archive, offering the fiendish librarian a faint nod as you walked around him to reach one of the bookshelves. Not wanting to spend more time here than necessary, you quickly browsed through the leather-bound spines, reading the letters on them so fast that you sometimes had to go back and reread them.

“A rare sight, I must admit.”

You had not spent fifteen minutes looking when you heard Raphael’s voice behind you, turning your head to look at him. He stood before you in his human form, arms crossed, and eyes studying you quietly. Clasping your hands behind your back, you replied, “Hello, Raphael. I didn’t know you were home.”

“I do not exactly share my schedule with you, (y/n),” he replied matter-of-factly, walking over to an armchair with calculated steps before letting himself sink into it.

“Yes, I did not mean to imply otherwise,” you said, cheeks flushing a bit.

Raphael stroked his chin with two fingers, eyes settled on you as you turned back to the bookshelf and your quest to find a certain tome. An awkward pause followed, and as much as you tried to keep your attention on the books, feeling his presence behind you was overwhelming.

“I am glad to see you are finally taking up on my offer to make use of my library. Your growing powers are beneficial to me too, after all.”

You heard him shift in his seat; he had crossed his legs, but you did not turn to face him since you finally found what you were looking for. The tome was very high up, but you could clearly read the golden letters on its spine: Grimoire of Arcane Aegis.

Embarrassed, you stretched your arm to reach for the book, visibly struggling. Why did these books have to be so heavy and so high up?

Steps sounded behind you, and you froze as you suddenly felt him standing right next to you, arms crossed. You swallowed, turning your head to look up at him. He smelled like an even more intense mixture of sulfur and leather and the moment you met his eyes, you were reminded why you usually avoided eye contact with him. It was very hard to look away.

Keeping his eyes locked with yours, he reached out for the tome and let it slip into his hand effortlessly before holding it out for you to take.

Your gaze dropped to the book momentarily before resettling on his eyes. Muttering a ‘thank you,’ you took it, quickly raising your other hand to help support its weight. You had expected it to be heavy, but certainly not that heavy.

“You're quite welcome,” he said, a hint of amusement in his voice. “Enchantment is a useful skill. Though it is one I did not expect you to want to learn.”

Pressing the book to your chest, you shrugged your shoulders, letting your eyes wander around the archive aimlessly. “I figured taking control over an enemy’s body would be beneficial in one way or another.”

He narrowed his eyes slightly, the smile still playing on his lips. “That does not only apply to enemies.”

You were just about to open the tome when you froze, the color in your cheeks deepening as you swallowed. Clearing your throat, you turned on your heel and walked over toward a desk far to your right, where you laid the open book down.

Briefly, you looked at Raphael over your shoulder while your hand rested on the open page. “Well, thank you for allowing me to make use of your archive.”

“I am quite surprised you have never made use of it before,” he remarked, pacing behind you as he watched you read the letters written in elegant handwriting on the worn-out pages. There were stains here and there and sigils you did not understand yet. But you would learn.

Raphael tilted his head to the side, coming to a halt right behind you. He gazed over your shoulder down at the paper, his breath hot in the nape of your neck.

“Are you avoiding me, (y/n)? Because I would expect a little more gratitude for lending you my powers and knowledge.”

You gulped, pressing your lips together as you placed your hands on the desk, using it to support your weight a little. Your knees suddenly felt very weak.

“I remember when I met you first,” he said, his voice lower than before. “You were an interesting case. Powerless in a world filled with magic and creatures stronger than you could ever fathom. Yet your determination to save your beloved persisted. A shame he took it for granted.”

Tears stung your eyes as you stared at the pages before you, not even reading them. Partially because of how your mind wandered, and partially because of your blurred vision. You really did not need to be reminded of how the person you had sold your soul for abandoned you the moment his life was safe again.

“Revenge is a powerful motivator to harness new abilities.”

You sucked in a breath as you turned to face your patron, taken aback for a moment by how close he was, trapping you between himself and the desk behind you. Only now did you notice how the other souls and fiends who had been here when you entered must have left now, perhaps intimidated by their master’s presence.

“I feel nothing for him anymore,” you finally stated emotionlessly, your expression neutral as your eyes jumped between his.

“That is not the truth, is it?” His question was sarcastic, if anything. “You feel hatred for him. And regret. I can see the burning anger behind your eyes.” He suddenly inched closer, grabbing the edge of the desk behind you with his hands, fully preventing your escape now.

“And what would you have me do about it?” you whispered, tilting your head up so you could keep looking at him, while you leaned away from him, your hands threatening to touch since they still rested on it for support.

The corner of Raphael’s mouth twitched as he cocked his head, his eyes twinkling. Your nervousness seemed to be very entertaining to him, and you cursed yourself for the way your heart began to race as his gaze dropped to your lips for just a second.

He was toying with you; you were sure of it. It was the reason you avoided visiting his House of Hope anyway, and why you dreaded when he decided to visit you. However, it was in your contract. Raphael was allowed to pay you a visit whenever he pleased to ask for a favor if he needed one, in exchange for your magical abilities.

“Perhaps, for a start,” he said, and you could feel the vibrations of his voice on your skin, “make more use of my library. I do not have to offer it to you, but I am choosing to. And I would certainly appreciate it if you would not take it for granted.”

You swallowed, shifting slightly, which caused your hand to brush against his. Sucking in a breath, you quickly pulled it away.

“Think about it, (y/n),” he said, straightening his back again, releasing you from the entrapment, which allowed you to finally relax your muscles. You looked at him for a moment more before he disappeared behind a whirlwind of flaming hot air.

—

You had spent the past days studying tomes in the House of Hope’s archive, diving deep into the knowledge they offered. It was not because of him or his invitation, but you knew he wouldn't believe it, so there was no use in arguing.

He did not check on you once, much to your relief, but still, you could not ignore the hint of disappointment hiding deep inside you. If someone had asked you whether you even just liked your patron, you would have said no. He owned you, or at least your soul for that matter. The difference was almost nonexistent.

You had put your hair up in a high ponytail, bound by a black piece of leather. Still, after hours of studying and burying your hands in your hair when you felt stuck, a few strands had loosened and were now framing your face in a quite inelegant manner.

With sleep-drunken eyes, you traced the edge of the tome in front of you with a finger. You had pulled a chair in front of the desk, but after having sat on it for hours, your back ached.

Rubbing your neck, you lifted one side of the open book and let it fall shut with a loud thud, louder than you had anticipated. It startled you, momentarily waking you from a state of half-sleep.

The House was quiet. Although time passed differently here, there were still moments when activity inside of it decreased, and it felt like a proper day-night cycle, at least for Hell standards.

“Still here?” You turned your head, startled, to find Raphael standing there.

“It would be nice if you stopped sneaking up on me,” you said, stretching your aching muscles a bit. You would have stood from your chair, but you were too tired for formalities. Raphael had never minded much, to your surprise. You believed it was because he knew that you were afraid and wary of him anyway. He did not need proof of it. Though despite your relaxed stance, you were very much on your guard.

“I was told you have been here for hours,” he said, ignoring your remark purposefully. “A tired mind cannot comprehend newly learned information that well. You should rest.”

You scoffed. If you did not know better, you would have thought he was genuinely worried about you, but you were sure that the real reason for this was purely a logical one. Namely, the explanation he had just given you.

With your hand on your shoulder, you looked up at him, smiling faintly. You hoped he wouldn’t see that it was not a sincere smile, but he must have been used to your feigned politeness by now. After all, it was something you had been taught from childhood.

“Sorry,” you replied, rubbing your neck. “I’ll leave. I didn’t mean to overstay my welcome.” The words came out automatically, as if memorized and said a thousand times before. Raphael raised a hand, gesturing for you to remain seated. 

“No need to apologise, (y/n).” He approached you, eyes locked with yours until he came to a halt right in front of you. The flame dancing inside the fireplace to your left crackled; the only sound filling the archive now. The fire cast shadows on his face, while he raised his hand and let it linger between you in the air, as if he was not sure whether to proceed. 

You looked up at him, lips slightly parted as you held onto the backrest of your chair. Your breath was shallow, the intensity of his gaze resting heavily upon you. 

“You don’t need to leave, either,” he added as he finally closed the distance and trapped your chin between his index finger and thumb, turning your head up so you had to look at him, whether you wanted to or not. You swallowed and blinked at him, your cheeks hot. 

Your heart was hammering in your chest as you felt him trace the edge of your jawline until he reached your cheek, cupping it firmly, yet not strong enough for it to hurt. 

The implication in his voice made it hard for you to breathe, partially due to anticipation, and partially because you were scared of what would happen if you refused. He had never been rude to you, or threatened you in any truly concerning way. After all, your loyalty and soul were worth something to him. And still, you had never put your guard down before. 

“What are you saying?” You asked breathlessly, gripping the backrest of your chair so tightly that your knuckles turned white. You did not want to risk a misunderstanding. 

“You could stay in my bed tonight. I've seen the look in your eye. I've heard the way your heart beats when I'm near.” His hand slid down from your cheek, briefly touching your bottom lip with his thumb, before he reached your chest. He pressed it against you, right between your breasts where your heartbeat could be felt. It quickened again, which made him smirk faintly. 

“There.” 

You swallowed, wetting your dry throat as you tried to keep your mind clear, but it was hard when his presence was so mesmerizing. 

Jaw clenched, you narrowed your eyes slightly and said, “I thought your bed was occupied by Haarlep.”

It was not a question, but an observation.

You did not know where the courage had come from, most likely the lack of sleep, but you could see that something in his gaze shifted at the mention of the demon’s name. 

Raphael crouched down beside you, pulling his hand away only to offer you his open palm. Now you were looking down at him, resisting the temptation to bury your hand in his brown hair. 

“I dream of you, (y/n),” he whispered, his fingers curling as he looked up at you. “I had not thought it possible for a mortal to occupy so much space in my mind, following me even to my dreams. Haunting me with words that linger in the air unspoken.” 

“Are you mocking me?” Your voice was an octave higher than usual, your hand shaking slightly as he traced circles over the back of it. Then, he shook his head faintly, hand tightening around yours.

“I am confessing.” 

You inhaled sharply, seeing no sign of deception in his eyes, but beings like him excelled at it, so you could not trust even the sincerity in his eyes. 

This was a dangerous game you were playing, and you knew it. How could this ever work with a contract quite literally binding your soul to him? But you were in no state to make judgments, let alone good ones. 

You raised your hand toward him, brushing a strand of hair from his temple. He reacted, closing his eyes at your touch as if he had in fact been anticipating it for a long time. You left your hand there, gently touching his cheek when he opened his eyes again to meet yours. 

Lips slightly parted, and with newfound confidence, you let yourself slide from the chair down into his lap, straddling him on the cold stone floor. You saw him suck in a breath, eyes flickering between yours. 

Behind him, the flame was dancing to a rhythm not yet set, illuminating your face for him to see each scar that marked it; one on your forehead, two on your cheeks, and a small one on your chin. Without the light, most of them would not have even been visible. 

Raphael reached out, letting his index finger run over the scar that stretched from your eyebrow to your cheekbone. You had to close your eyes when he reached your lid and opened it again only when he stopped at your cheek. 

“Where did you get it from?” He asked, sitting up a little straighter so that your breath mixed between you. You smelled of forest and morning dew, almost entirely muted by his scent of smoke and leather. 

“Bandits,” you replied, your noses touching as you rested your hands on his shoulders. “I was lucky to get away with only this scar.” He hummed in response, his hand finding its way into your hair. 

“No need to ever fear mere bandits again,” he said and your lips briefly touched as he spoke. Raphael’s gaze dropped to your mouth, and before you could even say anything in return, he pressed his lips to yours. 

You pulled yourself closer towards him, feeling the growing pressure against you from underneath. You smirked, liking the effect you had on him. It was then that you realized how Raphael, a powerful being in his own right and heir to Mephistopheles himself, was mere butter in your hands. Perhaps you had been wrong to be so afraid of him the whole time.

You pushed him to the ground so that he was lying on his back with you sitting on his waist, hands pressed against his chest. The fear, if you could even call it that, which you had previously felt was gone now. Fingers brushing against his cheek you said, “You can turn, Raphael. You don’t need to hide.” 

He looked up at you, his expression unreadable. You already thought you had said something wrong and felt panic build up in your chest when you saw his horns and wings materialize underneath you. His skin was flaming hot in color now, his eyes burning like two orbs of fire against an endless void. 

You brushed across one of his horns, feeling the hard material on your fingers as his wings gently enveloped you, the leathery material tingling your shoulders where they were exposed.

Then, you grabbed his horn and pressed yourself against his body, uniting your lips in a hungry kiss. You, too, had dreamed of him on multiple occasions, a mixture of nightmares and wet dreams, and though you were still wary of the cambion underneath you, you could not help losing yourself in the process. 

Trousers were unbuckled, and he dug his clawed fingers into your side when you lifted your hips a bit to throw your clothes away, your eyes always staying locked with his. 

“You are eager, aren’t you?” He said, his hands playing with the hem of your undergarments while he smiled, amusement marking his features and voice. “Days ago you could barely look at me.” 

Rocking your hips back and forth you stared down at him, bottom lip trapped between your teeth. “Because it was hard not to imagine this each time I did,” you whispered, leaning forward so you could wrap your hand around the erection.

He gasped, exposing his sharp canines as you guided him to the wetness between your legs. With your hand wrapped around his horn, he wrapped his wings tighter around you, holding you in place, as he rolled over so that he was now on top, majestic wings spread out before you. They were large and reminded you of those of a bat. 

You had still wrapped your hands around his horns, now both of them, which forced him to keep his head close to yours. He picked up where you left off, matching the rhythm you had set before as his hand came to cup one of your breasts. His sharp nails dug into the sensitive skin around your nipple, causing you to gasp for air, before it settled between your legs, gently playing with the sensitive piece of flesh there. 

With each thrust that he did, you felt a stronger need to hold onto him. You let go of one of his horns to wrap your arm around his shoulders, only opening your eyes when you felt his on you. It felt as if his flaming irises could see deep inside the soul you had sold to him, your eyes held captive by them. 

You did not know whether this was too personal, whether you were crossing a line, but you leaned forward and pressed your forehead against his, feeling the thin layer of sweat that had formed on his skin, around his horns, and the hard bone that grew from his head like a crown. 

When you finally felt like you were close to your climax, you kissed him again, silencing a loud moan that would have otherwise been heard even outside the archive, you were sure.

The thrusting stopped and you held each other for a moment, catching your breaths. He had propped himself up, his hand resting on the ground next to your head as he sat up straight, exiting you in the process. Sweat glistened on his red torso, highlighted by the fire still burning behind you and you smiled softly as he offered you a hand. 

You took it, momentarily startled when he pulled you towards him with force, using his wings once again to hold you in place. 

“That was a good start,” he whispered, brushing a loose strand of hair out of your face. “But perhaps we should take this to the boudoir now?”

A hint of hesitation crossed your face and you averted your gaze, but he placed a hand under your chin and forced you to look at him again. “Do not worry, my dear. Haarlep is of no use to me anymore.”

We might just get away with it The altar is my hips Even if it's a false god We'd still worship this love

[dennydreadful]

HI THANKS FOR ANSWERING MY UNHINGED ASK THIS WILL BE VERY LONG BUT I READ THE COMIC IN ONE SITTING. im now going back and forth between imagining what kind of deeply toxic pseudo-vigilante shenanigans bunny (and caleb by association) get into post epilogue and thinking up scenarios where before shit got really real they both get soooooo much good therapy and heal together and end up toxicly codependent and kinda bad for each other still but in a way that doesn’t involve murder. like one of those aita posts where the general consensus is the couple should stay together bc even tho they’re both just exacerbating each others Issues at least nobody else is getting hurt. also i think dave and juicybaby hook up at some point.

have you ever seen that post that’s like “media in which it’s so very obvious all the problems could’ve been avoided if this guy got some therapy and a consensual bdsm relationship but that is very much Not What Happens in the story”? bc i feel like that applies to caleb. rip caleb you would’ve loved being a more well adjusted girl’s puppy and being led around the mall on a leash until security kicked you out. maybe next time king.

none of this to say i didn’t enjoy the comic as presented immensely btw. despite my ramblings here i think the comic ended in the most satisfying (for the audience at least) way possible. we love to see a dogboy beg for his own demise <3 we love to see a pretty girl go from justified anger to righteous rage <3 we love when characters have a deeply unhealthily fucked up perception of love and care and mental stability <3

like imo psychological horror is at its best when you take relatively normal people facing relatively mundane horrors then letting the aftermath of those horrors warp them beyond repair. in a good psych horror (at least when it’s like ii is and based on deeply human characters dealing with stuff in the most unhelpful way they can) you should be able to understand why and how things turned out like they did. you can think of a million ways it could’ve turned out differently if only the characters had seen the end coming, but the end they met was inevitable bc they *can’t* see it coming. the red flags aren’t obvious bc they increase so gradually. the bones of the building were there from the very beginning, but how were the characters supposed to know whether it’d be a home or a slaughterhouse? there were no plans, just bricks to lay and a storm coming. and that’s exactly how i felt finishing ii.

anyways. a caleb shaker charm would be so awesome i would love to go darla from finding nemo on his ass. thanks for the incredible comic my brain chemistry is different now and i’m kissing u on both cheeks in thanks MWAH MWAH

Cut because this post ended up really long, but here's Dave and Juicy:

idyllic island is a big old vent comic in a lot of ways. i drew on a lot of my own emotions and experiences to make it. i was in a very dark place for a very long time. i could have very easily gone down an even worse path, and very easily have been taken advantage of in a very dangerous way. but "guy goes to therapy and learns how to stop climbing into a wood chipper" is not a terribly interesting story imo, even if it's obviously the better outcome in real life. much more interesting to read about characters hurtling headlong towards certain doom lol

that said i always enjoy a good tragedy that leaves me feeling like "it didn't need to be like this..." (even though I know it was always the only way it was ever going to be) and imagining a happy world where everything worked out as best it could, so it's really cool to hear about someone doing that something I made!

before you read the next part just know that i LOVE hearing people's headcanons so feel free to disregard anything/everything i say here. death of the author and all that lol

imo he would have needed to never meet bunny for him to actually heal, and for her to not charge ahead on her path of destruction. even if he had gone to therapy and straightened himself up, bunny is so toxic she would have found exactly the right way to break him again (and honestly she would enjoy the added challenge). and couple's therapy would be SO BAD for him because she'd learn how manipulate and gaslight him even harder.

honestly I can't see a future for bunny where she DOESNT commit murder. she's a scorpion. it's simply her nature. it's not her fault we live in a society. perhaps she could have become a doctor and euthanized her patients discretely. i think she'd enjoy forensic science as well, but that would literally make her girl Dexter lol. maybe she could work for a three letter agency.

but yeah I absolutely agree that caleb would have LOVED to be in a 24/7 lifestyle BDSM relationship with a girl that did not want to grind him down to dust and scatter him on the wind. being a kinky freak with a loving partner would have fixed him 100%

[sgiandubh]

Do you think he does different types of promo to attract all the different crowds?

Dear Promo Anon,

Not only I think he does that, I also happen to think he (or anyone seriously hoping to sell anything other than snake oil) should do exactly that.

The problem is not the logical correlation between what you want to sell and the people to whom you want to sell it. The first problem is the lack of balance between your way of interacting with your different target groups, which could lead to a very fuzzy brand image. Both of your products and of yourself, who are their creator and main promoter.

Promoting a brand without a clear set of main ideas and values is very likely to have a negative impact on your sales. Show them biceps, sea, sex (?) and sun galore is all fine and dandy for the younger crowd (and the LGBT+ one, btw). But showing at the same time that you can be a gentleman (please, for the love of Saruman, get rid of those rings! that woman doesn't know what she's talking about!) should be at least on par with the Lustfest promise you ventilate to your other segment. Possible message being: working hard and playing hard - you can have the best of both worlds (or at least try).

The second problem is that S's brand is.. ehrm... way too personal. Too approachable (I already mentioned the Costco Hugfest) for a rabid fandom. That goes both ways, btw, because many (on both sides of the Great Divide) honestly feel they own a bit of S. At the same time, he is also JAMMF to many people in here, who imagine he has almost superhuman qualities (most probably not the case). That is exhilarating and empowering, until it's not. One or three or twenty faux-pas later, people will feel the savage urge to spit on the idol. A simple matter of collective instinct, but a very tricky situation for S.

The third problem are the side players. I am not talking about AN or CB or TMcG or the Fitness Harem. I am talking about the Trolls, who really don't do him any favor. Nothing worse for his brand potential than lascivious comments - let's suppose you are a major distributor's marketing expert and you land on That Blog, where the owner shares publicly her dream of licking her way from (how was it?) LHR to GLA to the Highlands to the ends of the known Universe, for a chance of God knows what. What would you write in that memo to the CEO? 'Yes, please: immediately place ALL his booze upfront near the cashier, because the man is an idol to a bunch of fifty-something women who dream the impossible dream?' You think I am exaggerating? Try googling for SRH tumblr and see the first results (😱). These people are visible and that visibility directly informs the interaction between SS and its potential business partners. Especially when your Partner Everyday thought blasting a sizeable chunk of OL's Tumblr fandom in Vanity Fair was a clever strategy for The Win - things like this invite (unwanted) attention.

I pleaded for diversification of the marketing strategy and for a more sophisticated approach and I welcome the change, Anon. The only thing I would like you to take home from this very long answer is simple:

Social Media is just Social Media. The glitz, the glam, the superficial stardust, the Truman Show where it never rains.

Real Life is Real Life. We only see glimpses, speculate on it, have a more or less educated guess and if we are lucky enough, some tidbits to chew on.

Progressively, the very unprofessional (bantering) Social Media strategy has been replaced with an account strategy based on product promotion. Convenient, when you do not (for reasons X, Y and Z) want to discuss what you feel is private and likely to remain so, for a while.

That's about it, Anon. If you still have questions, you can always pop in here. I promise I won't charge a retainer, out of my good heart.

[soaps-mohawk]

hi!! It’s been sad seeing u have to deal with so much recently :(( both irl and anons being assholes on here so here are some musings that will hopefully cheer u up!!!

I know u said no pregnancy was gonna happen in the doc BUT when I first got into this doc (binged it in like 1 day btw) I also went thru and looked at almost ALLLL of your extra posts, lore, FQA, etc. And one that stuck with me a lot was explaining what would happen if reader was to accidentally get pregnant and who would retire and I. I have not been able to forget this fic is literally my Roman Empire on my mind literally 24/7 let me tell u

I just feel like there are so many good opportunities for it to be sweet but also angsty as hell. I imagine after some time Price actually becomes rather suited to being a father. He never really thought he had much going for him besides the military but now he has this little bundle who looks up to him for everything and it all just sort of clicked for him. I imagine after some time too, Gaz wants a little one of his own……one from the alpha and one from the beta y’know……now u just have another little carbon copy of Gaz running around

also ofc Simon and Johnny are there to visit at any and all times they can. Holidays, week-long breaks between deployment, etc. the pups love them so much and all their attention is stolen by their two uncles where they’re here. I feel like when they come to visit the pack might sort of be how it used to? They’re definitely still very affectionate like they were in the old days and it’s just easy for everyone to slip into the habit of kissing each other or scenting.

But I feel like after some time, Johnny would definitely yearn to have a similar lifestyle to what price and gaz retired to. He sees you as a family so happy (they get PLENTY of pics and videos too ofc) and he kind of wishes he’d retired and got you to have another little MacTavish himself. He doesn’t regret staying with Simon by any means, but he misses his pack the way it used to be, and he’s getting older, after all. It’s only natural.

AAA I DIDNF MEAN FOR JT TO BE THIS LONG KM SK SORRY BUT I HAD TO FET THIS OUT LFMSOO hope ur feeling better soon!!! Don’t listen to stupid anons >:00 drink water eat food and sleep we love u!!!!! 🫶🫶

— 🌘 !

Aww it's okay anon!!! I love seeing people's thoughts and ideas about my fic!! One of my favorite things, actually. So share away!! I don't mind 💚 I am feeling a bit better. Taking it easy and taking care of myself too. Don't forget to take care of yourself too!!

Price definitely has the most potential for picking up fatherhood easily. He might be the most nervous at first, but he said in the fic he had considered settling down with an omega at one point, so his sudden fatherhood wouldn't be that big of a shock for him. He's definitely the most experienced, perhaps not with actual children, but he can lead a squad of soldiers through what are essentially suicide missions. He can handle a baby.

Gaz definitely is the most excited out of everyone for the baby. Reader definitely has to give him looks sometimes because he's reading the parenting books and looking up which furniture is the best and researching milestones. He's the most prepared out of all of them, or at least as prepared as one can be for a baby. And of course as soon as he sees the baby he's going to want one of his own. That's a given lol.

Johnny is definitely the fun uncle. The pups all love when he comes to visit. Gets them riled up and wears them out so they finally sleep 😂 That's definitely the only reason they don't complain about him getting them too excited. He'd definitely yearn for the quiet life after a while. He'd want to be there and be with his pack. He loves Simon, but he'd get tired after a while. He'd be welcomed back with open arms, just as Simon will when he eventually retires too.