#expectations are negative
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HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP PLEASE
Hi everybody, how are we doing? I hope you're enjoying the beginning of fall. Now that I'm done just being hospitable, can I just be honest? Can I vent? Can I be heard? Am I allowed to express my hurt? Can I please request for aid?
I am struggling to all hell. On and off the streets and been homeless since June 1st. I don't need resource information- I need immediate relief in the form of financial support. My partner and I are doing our best to be strong but being strong does not help when we're in the position where we're lucky just to eat, or do laundry. Over this summer I have been robbed of my possessions (cards, clothes, cash, toiletries, my phone... all of which I struggled to get to begin with). I have been sexually assaulted and put through violent situations. Detained because people LIED and I guess that means guilty until proven innocent. Woke up undressed for reasons unbenounced to me in a house fire surrounded by flames and SOMEHOW, unfortunately survived. Somehow contracted a disease that has no fucking cure. I have reached out to EVERYONE I KNOW BEGGING FOR HELP. I have taken so much shit in exchange for the smallest amount of help, for food, for access to medical attention or a shower or for privacy. I have been homeless with a 103 degree fucking fever that lasted for days and got no help because I was too sick to move. I crawled to a shower and sat on the floor hoping my brain wouldn't melt (which it begins to at such temperatures btw). All this did not happen because I'm "lazy" or "a bad woman".
I am a woman presenting person who probably should have just been born in the right body or into the right wealthy ass family. I am in my 20s. I have been told I would make a great prostitute but I wasn't even made for of- nor am I interested. My abusive ass neglectful ass family are not helping me through my situation and my mom tells me I deserve it so that she doesn't have to cry while listening to me explain how bad things have gotten. I have a stab wound on my neck. I have burns on my body. I did not put those there myself. How could anybody deserve any of that? How could anybody do nothing to help? How can you just look at me and pessimistically say, "good luck". Or give the apathetic and unhelpful "me too" response.
My partner lost his dog after the fire. Can you imagine having to pretend like that doesn't matter because you have to worry about food? Can you imagine trying to provide emotional support because red cross never called back after you requested for health services? When your school says they can't help you because it's out of the budget???? "LIMITED FUNDS" they say. I was on the Dean's honor roll for TWO semesters in a row, almost close to getting my BA (just a few classes away). I was a student leader. UNTIL I had to finally say fuck that shit and drop. I have enough credits to graduate but I do not see how the fuck I'm going to survive until 2025.
I need help! Please help? Words of encouragement are appreciated but please help me raise enough for a down payment for a car to live in. That is what I'm asking for, at least for winter. I would like an apartment but California is so outrageous with prices, all I can hope for realistically is a car. Anything would help. Nothing is expected.
Please rb this post, if you can, it helps.
Always remember to maintain your humanity and that love persists.
Garlic haters DNI
my paypal is @garyanne
#forreal if you don't like garlic then don't eat my adobo or sit at my makeshift dinner table because it will REEK to you#at least garlic exists#at least there's still squirrels to share almonds with#at least sometimes people give me eye contact lol#standards are low#expectations are negative#help?#crowdfunding
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dont worry about it jason...
#im trying to figure out how to draw them#the brothers ever#jason todd#robin jason todd#discowing#dick grayson#if i get even one negative comment about the discowing suit youre all going in the blender#no.1 discowing supporter#batfamily#batman#dc comics#they are so brothers you cant tell me otherwise#i struggled with this help me#expect more art if i can GET MY SHIT TOGETHER#jason todd robin#my art#dc art#this might have been based on an incorrect quotes generator but SHHH
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Sukuna is Peak Gap Moe. I’ll never be over this. This bastard talks tough, eats people, and kills like a woodchipper and yet…he is a poetic little sap. Getting mad over an improper haikus, the misidentification of flowers…and confessing his feelings to Gojo Satoru under several layers of wordplay no one except those well-versed in ancient Japanese would catch.
I've been over this in greater detail in Sukuna's Negative Rizz, but @tangsakura added more context in the replies to that post, making Sukuna's use of 凡夫 (bonpu) for Gojo even gayer.
In summary, 凡夫 (bonpu) can be translated as painfully ordinary or unenlightened. But in the individual kanji readings, 凡 is mediocre and 夫 is husband. You could read this as Sukuna calling Gojo his mediocre husband. And that's just the modern readings! The ancient readings...
So you can read this line from Sukuna as the following:
“You were born in an era without me and hailed as 'The Strongest'
1) And yet you turned out to be…painfully ordinary.”
2) And yet you turned out to be…unenlightened.”
3) And yet you turned out to be…a mediocre husband/wife/spouse.”
4) And yet you turned out to be…the ordinary one who could stand by my side.”
Sukuna seems to be saying these things all at once. (It’s no different than the Megumi Activities wordplay he uses with Enchain. Alt. link if the Twitter dies.) Gojo apparently makes him feel very conflicted. He’s boring, he can do better, he shouldn’t even call himself the Honored One, he’s his equal, they’re married. The irony here is that no one except Sukuna can understand this.
#cactus shut up#Also he said this live on TV and the chapter ended on ''the one who will teach you love is…''#I’m isolating this from Sukuna’s Negative Rizz because I want more people to see and understand Sukuna called Gojo his wife.#Well his girlhusband boywife spouse who is also totally mid and ordinary and the one who could stand by his side.#When the ''Sukuna is having dead wife flashbacks'' is no longer a joke.#I am once again asking. When the everloving fudge did Sukuna decide they were married.#I understand wedding ceremonies weren’t really a thing in the Heian Era. But what the hell Sukuna.#What a fudging sap. I hate him. I’m going to call him slurs.#When I say this motherfudger is Beatrice I’m serious.#He killed Gojo by making him the center of his world and expected this physics major to understand the abstract symbolism of the violence.#Sukuna doesn’t know what to do with his feelings for Gojo and he made it everyone’s problem.#Gege’s toxic doomed yaoi has me Obsessed.#sukugo#ryomen sukuna#jujutsu kaisen#jjk spoilers
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Yuki Tsunoda as The Moon Tarot:
The Moon is a card of illusion and deception, and therefore often suggests a time when something is not as it appears to be. Perhaps a misunderstanding on your part, or a truth you cannot admit to yourself. Night is the time when dreams and fantasies rule.
The moon also represents instincts that we have buried in our own unconscious - they come out to play in the moonlight. But the reflections that we see springing forth can also be illusions, it is easy to lose your way in the dark.
Embracing the Moon tarot card meaning allows us to face our fears and uncertainties, trusting our instincts to guide us towards the right path.
Tag list: @st-leclerc @rubywingsracing @saviour-of-lord @three-days-time @the-wall-is-my-goal @albonoooo @ch3rubd0lls
#this one is kind of a bummer#but it fits :-/#idk!!#I just feel that no only do people not read yuki correctly#but they like … fall for an illusion I.e him being smaller ? and putting him under Asian stereotypes?#like bc of that he isn’t allowed to be as temperamental as the other drivers and they always expect him to be a little meeker? or quieter?#and also now that hes matured more and isn’t as temperamental they still treat him like a ticking time bomb?#he is also being dealt false promises of advancement to the main team#I think this one just fits#even though it’s typically a more negative card#yuki tsunoda#yt22#red bull racing#vcarb#alpha tauri#f1 tarot#the moon#the moon tarot#f1#formula 1#f1blr#f1 fanart#formula one#f1 art#annie’s art#formula one fanart#formula 1 fanart#formulanni
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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im a child of divorce
#the bit is over when i say its over and even when its so joever for these two its not over for me!!! (once again i am on heavy copium)#anyway. thoughts behind the spoiler tags#gempearl#shiny duo#wild life smp#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#i feel like. i actually was expecting that#no but its so funny the one time the negative consequences of something does actually get acknowledged its the SL finale ‘betrayal’/j#like cmon fuck me i guess/j (BIG EMPHASIS. ON THE SLASH J. OKAY.)#but honestly though i did expect Gem to hold a grudge over the 2v1 in SL. and. its good that there are consequences???#it IS a ‘betrayal’ in Gem’s eyes. they were friends. they were murder besties for the last two sessions and then Pearl chose Scar over her#and its awesome man. [through gritted teeth] this is awesome man this will be good for character development ok ok ok. ok?#its also got something to do with Pearl having the red creep in. i think#because during SL Gem was like. nearly idolising the Scarlet Pearl persona while vaguely aware that her own reputation has a similar effect#and yknow. the horrors. the fact that their image is so heavily built on what others deem them to be and they can only play into it#but by the end of SL Gem gets ‘betrayed’ by this persona that she looked up to#and also her own ‘GeminiSlay’ intimidating image is also starting to fall apart. partly of her own will#and now shes watching Pearl slowly turn red again. and this time she knows its not good for her or Pearl#so shes distancing herself from it. shes ‘trying to fix her reputation’. she sees Pearl falling into it again and just. no. i dont love you#you betrayed me last season#but on Pearl’s end of things she’s already deep into the idea that as long as you say you ‘forgive’ someone then everything thats happened#in the past doesn’t matter and they can all be friends. and nooo absolutely no grudges will be held. no emotional repression here#so. because thats happened to her in her own team she thinks the same can happen with her and Gem#and thats so. im going to blow myself up now
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Even Cahara agrees
#It’s not a Bauhaus it’s a Bauhome#I got with Chambara let’s gooooo#I’ve been putting together music headcanons I’m glad Cahara is with me on this#Enkis such a goth elitist guys trust#Ik he fw type o negative tho#I was NOT expecting the nickname tho my friends and I were actually cackling#I love dungeon nights idc#fear and hunger#funger#enki ankarian#cahara#not art
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more pics of the moomin nendoroid
#I mean he's cute but he only comes with a shell and an angy face...#I feel like a snufkin would be more interesting to me. he's also just more detailed as a character anyway#merch#sorry come back cause my previous tags sound so negative lmao he's ADORABLE#I was just hoping he'd have more extra stuff not just a shell lol#v v cute tho I love the pic of him sitting angy in the hand#edit: OH HE'S NOT EXPENSIVE AS I THOUGHT HE'D BE LMAO?#why was I expecting him to be like £100 or something aldjfksl he's super cheap#...oh but they can't ship it to the uk. womp womp#oh there's a goodsmile europe! yay!
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The issue with the live action taking out all the gender-based conflict in season 1 isn't that I think Sokka needs his sexist arc to be Sokka, but it's that Sokka is a deeply insecure character and one of the ways that manifests in the start is him basically playacting what he thinks a confident person looks like--eg, a manly man. In the same vein Katara being forced into a mother/caretaker role at way too young an age is integral to the best part of her character, which is being a pissed off angry force of nature who will wreck your entire day when properly motivated. By stripping those two aspects away, the characters are fundamentally different people and cannot have as in-depth or fully realized arcs as in the OG cartoon. In this essay I will
#natla#atla#sokka#katara#I will die on this hill#It's better than I expected but I had negative expectations SO
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#29.06.23#3399#jean d'heure#negativity#none of this is a judgment or a statement on what should be expected from transition or what should be done about it#thats just me slapping down some of my frustration about feelings of stagnation and aimlessness about it all
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also i think people should stop using ace as a synonym for sex repulsed actually
#archi screaming#asexual#like. just say sex repulsed/sex negative/don’t like sex#it’s so irritating that everyone expects asexuals to fucking hate sex and i’m sick of it actually
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> open up twitter
> be told there’s a dsmp renaissance happening
> ask if it’s a dsmp renaissance or a c!sbi renaissance
> twitter doesn’t understand
> pulls out illustrated diagram explaining what is dsmp and what is just c!sbi
> twitter laughs and says “it’s a good renaissance sir”
> scroll down my timeline
> it’s a c!sbi renaissance
#icarus speaks#neg#sorry due to stuff going on in my personal life rn#i am in a Hater Mood#i ain’t expecting it until i see 300 tweets about catmaid h on my desk#chop chop bitches#to clarify i don’t think ppl posting about just ctommy phil and techno#are in the wrong#but acting like we’re so back when i’ve barely even seen CTUBBO posting over there is insane
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what if mira's parents were like... "oh our precious darling baby, please never grow up!" sort of parents.... not cruel, but stifling. deciding what she'll do, and then doing it for her. not letting her learn and try and fail and grow into her own, independent self.
of course she would love the religion of change! of course she would believe so passionately in the importance of discovering and reinventing yourself. of course she would have been missing basic life skills when she first came to the house, and enamored with whoever patiently taught them to her. of course she would take every class available, try everything she was denied.
and of course it would feel awful, when she kept failing. she started out at a deficit and has felt two steps behind ever since. and every time she tries a new skill and makes a mistake, she hears her parents say, just let us do it for you. and every time she compares her same-old self to the unique and talented people around her, she wonders if maybe her parents were right about her. maybe she wasn't meant to have her own interests, to make her own choices. maybe she can't learn. maybe she can't grow. maybe she'll be a useless child forever.
it's hard to decide how she feels about her parents. they never hurt her, so why does she feel so hurt when she thinks about them? they loved her, so why doesn't she love them?
and it's hard to admit the faults of the change belief. it saved her from stagnation! and yet, here she is. smothered again. expected not to stay the same, but to become someone else.
why can't she just be who she is?
#isat mirabelle#mirabelle#isat#in stars and time#i bet she was lightly admonished for being negative or rude#and now it's so hard to say she dislikes someone#hard to stand up for herself#no gifted kid style 'can't try bc what if i fail' anxiety patterns#since she was never allowed to try lol#so she was able to enjoy throwing herself into new skills and trying and failing#but then she realized no one else is doing that forever :( but she doesn't want to stop :(#and THEN with saving the country. a whole new set of smothering expectations.#the perfect darling chosen one#why can't she just be who she IS!!!!!#thoughts#thoughts about mirabelle#silver's greatest hits
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as an eddie girl who loves buddie and enjoys bucktommy, one of the best things to come out of the tommy and eddie hate is how many of you have exposed yourselves for being homophobic, misogynistic, racist, classist, elitist, and bigoted motherfuckers ✨🫧
#no but for real. calling tommy the walmart eddie? let’s break this down first#claiming tommy is the walmart eddie to express your hatred for tommy is also expressing your distaste for eddie#using walmart as a negative description is classiest and elitist and racist#but i don’t expect any of you privileged fucks to think about the connotations of your words#we know you hate poor people. we know you hate poc. we know you hate tommy. we know you hate eddie.#we know you hate women. we know you hate kink. we know you hate stuff that makes you uncomfortable.#this is another example of the shit you say about fictional characters#carrying over into the real world and impacting real people#are you an ally and a friend or are you trying so hard to prove you aren’t conservative that you’ve gone far right again?#just some questions for questions for everybody to get their cobweb brains working <:#amanda talks
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This pissed me off so much when I was younger that now it's flipped on its head to being funny because...
People to me when I was younger having gone, "You can't possibly know you want hormones! Don't you know anything?! You can't just make decisions! You don't know health, you can't diagnose yourself as being dysphoric and needing that!" quickly turned into my medical teams frequently saying, "oh I didn't know that," and even confiding in me that I was their first trans patient they ever saw, much less learned about. How the fuck are you expecting a medical professional to diagnose an issue they haven't even heard of. Trans people really are expected to have a PhD in Being Trans just for the chance to be listened to (without the pay that comes with that education!).
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#transphobia#transphobia tw#the only thing that gave me a true ego boost was knowing how little medical professionals are expected to know#one of my past therapists almost... proudly (?) proclaimed she had to look through the DSM-V for gender dysphoria#needless to say my confidence in her was... significantly altered in a negative way#honestly the lab rat treatment i've gotten for... Being Trans has made it so much harder now to go to doctors though#i know i've talked about this before but this STILL astounds me and makes me laugh
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damn u on the edge of the bed..!
#HES FR GONNA STAY WITH TAKAAKI 🙏‼#obviously bc idk where else he would even go but still preview image saved my life#negaposi angler#negative positive angler#takaaki tsutsujimori#tsunehito sasaki#I LIKED THE FIRST EP A LOT MORE THAN I EXPECTED!!!#like i assumed i would enjoy it but i reallyyyy enjoyed it#it was a lot more comedic than i expected it would be given the premise LOL#why do i keep choosing the most random shit to watch each season#like yaa let me tune into Fishing Anime... thats gonna be a certified hit 💯💯
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