#which makes so much sense

[apricusapollo]

me and my best friend (who has never seen teen wolf) were talking and we have decided that liam is rapunzel, theo is flynn, corey is pascal and mason is maximus

[astuteobservations]

Lorde on her website

[soobiesworld]

watching grease and all i can say is daniel - sandy and johnny - danny

[melien]

[theirony-of-choking-on-this-dick]

so i had to call my doctor

so i can get a note

so i can submit it my job

so i can use my sick time

so i can take a couple mental health days

[maxtothemax]

okay i'm reading something for my literary theory class rn and it's giving me Thoughts about why the passage of time in max ride is so fucking jarring. i don't think that what i'm about to say is anything that others haven't pointed out about MR before, but i do think that it situates james patterson's writing within a larger literary tradition, SO!

the russian literary scholar mikhail bakhtin uses this term called "adventure-time" (i know, bear with me) to describe a particular style of time passage in novels (particularly in the genre of the greek romance, but it's applicable elsewhere). basically, adventure-time is a form of story-time outside of the "realistic" passage of time, where a bunch of different things happen to the characters that 1) have no impact on their character development, and 2) would realistically take up the duration of years in their life, but by the end of the story, the characters basically haven't aged. a good modern example of this concept is pokemon: ash ketchum has been ten years old for 20+ years, but because the story of pokemon takes place in "adventure-time," he experiences several lifetimes' worth of adventures and never ages.

similarly, maximum ride seems to take place in adventure-time. over the course of nine books, max and the flock only age roughly about one year. their adventures happen in this compressed story timeframe that has no relation to real-world time. others have noticed this; it's not a particularly new thought. adventure-time isn't uncommon in literature, though - these days, a good number of stories for kids in particular take place with this kind of nebulous time-frame (see again: pokemon). since it dates back to greek antiquity, it's a common way to conceptualize story-time.

HOWEVER. another attribute of adventure-time, as it's used in the greek romance, is that it lacks any references to real historical time. basically, any greek romance should be able to be read as though it's taking place in the reader's time, even if it was written 300 years earlier. nothing should jar the reader out of the sense that the story is taking place in adventure-time. (this used to be a lot more common in storytelling, and i feel like it's fallen out of favor because of the specificity of technology in different eras these days - it's hard to write a story now with any technology that feels truly timeless, but i digress.)

as others have pointed out, max's narration mentions markers of time and pop culture references that date the books very specifically. for example, in the second book (published around 2006), ari steals a gameboy from a department store; then, in the 7th (?) book, it mentions that it's 2010, but the flock have only aged about one year since the beginning of the series. by 2010, you likely wouldn't be able to buy a gameboy in a department store, and those are the types of chronological dissonances that readers absolutely latch onto (see: the entire history of the maximum ride fandom).

SO BASICALLY: maximum ride is doing this really weird thing where it's trying to take place in adventure-time (which requires readers to not think too hard about the passage of time), while also inserting very specific references that almost force readers to think about chronological time. if these specific references were taken out, i'd bet that readers would have an easier time excusing the sheer amount of events that supposedly take place within a single year of the flock's life, because nothing in the narration itself would prompt them to think about it.

anyway. james patterson doesn't understand adventure-time. thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

[onebizarrekai]

so like it was a universal experience to play ocarina of time as a kid and meet ruto and think "she's lying about having not left a bottle letter to help her because she's embarrassed about asking for help or rescue" and then never think about it again, right… right

because like, how could that letter have realistically ended up at the place you found it? what reason would ruto have to deny it considering the circumstances and her explanation for why she doesn't need help? did ganondorf himself put that letter there in order to set you up personally already knowing you'd get the spiritual stone from ruto because my brother just suggested that theory and oh my god that would be gold

[yvmoveon]

.

[coolfoxykitkat]

“Honey, this is basically a build-a-bitch workshop.”

-The Machining Guy at work when I asked if he could make a fixture with a magnet for me.

[transgender-catboy]

the music that plays when you're on the sky islands in totk. ... oooouuugghhhh

[frankcastled]

thinking about the time i got so sucked into the backrooms lore

[egophiliac]

So.... what are your thoughts on Ace's UM, if you haven't been asked this already?

sneaky magic for the sneakiest boy

no but really, I think it fits him really well! I had thought his UM would probably involve something kinda sleight-of-handy or pickpockety! and I looooved that it made such a nice loop-around back to episode 1. ❤️ I was. kind of half-expecting him to just run out and punch Riddle in the nose again. but instead this time 'twas he who offed the queen's head! it was great! and he did it while stone-cold terrified out of his mind! because Ace is the only remotely normal or well-adjusted person at NRC and therefore the only one who is like "we're going to literally die, this is super effed up". but he did it anyway!!!! I AM SO PROUD

[voiice-of-the-soul]

It irritates me alot when people say that making medic more compassionate is ''missing the point of his character'' when he is literally shown to be in the comics.... did you miss the part where he showed concern for both sniper and miss pauling's well being in comic 5 and 6.

His actions are a combination of genuine attachment + clinical interest and these things do not cancel out one another. He is always pushing boundaries and going against the grain and i think this is what led to him losing his license in the first place. He felt stifled by the rules imposed on him.

He is shown to be extremely passionate so it makes sense that he would use his endless fascination with medicine as a way to show his affection. He loves his friends so he will find a way to make them borderline indestructible. Malpractice is his love language.

[fantastic-mr-corvid]

so turns out my experience isnt normal and i have something severely wrong with me that i completely overlooked.

for the millionth time.

[lackpenny]

a broken man's last effort, all for nothing

[thebibliosphere]

Me and about four other people will care about this, but it has taken me this long to realize that in season 2 episode 9 of Pennyworth (shut up, it’s enrichment in my enclosure) when Alfred is posing as Tommy’s driver and waxing lyrical about how, when he’s in America, he’s going to have a car just like this one. And the car, is a Ford Lincoln Futura.

A Ford Lincoln Futura.

Aka— the original Batmobile as driven by Adam West.

He’s driving the original Batmobile!!!