#which is the cutest fucking thing in the world

[zickmonkey]

I fucked up the timeline a lil

[bi-writes]

the new baby you take care of is the cutest baby you've ever met. (a lil dubcon, baby trapping, 18+)

he has a big head with a tuff of little blond waves, and he has the brightest brown eyes in the entire world. he smiles at every face you make at him, and he takes a bottle like a champ and will nap for hours as long as you're quiet.

his father has a strict schedule set for him. when you met that big man for the very first time, you were speechless. your teeth had clacked together with how fast you tried to close your gawking mouth, but it was impossible not to with how much he towered over you, nearly touching the top of the doorway.

he is methodical, down to every minute. tacked onto the fridge, he had shown you his son's current schedule, which he emphasized with a dead glare must be followed to a T.

two feedings in the morning followed by a nap. another feeding. a longer nap. another feeding. another nap. all separated in increments of 45 minutes, with instructions on how to use the bottle warmer and how to measure the formula.

his son does not cry. his father had told you, if he cries, y'r doin' somethin' wrong. and he was right. the baby only cried when he was hungry, and he would fall into a dead sleep as soon as you gave him a bottle.

it's odd, to take care of someone else's baby. especially this man's. there's no woman in the house, as far as you can tell. the whole house is decorated very minimally, cozy and in shades of warm greens and cool blues and browns. there are no heeled boots by the door or pretty fur coats, and whenever you pass by his bedroom, only one side of his bed ever looks lived-in. there are no pictures on the walls, no makeup in the bathroom drawers, and no pads or tampons under the sink.

just a big, unfeeling man and his big, adorable baby.

but you think that your actions to get this big, unfeeling man to like you are starting to have the wrong kind of implications.

it starts with dinner. you start to make it, using the ingredients from his fridge to make stews and buttery mashed potatoes and roasted veggies. the image of you stirring a pot with his baby on your hip has not left him, and whenever you don't have some kind of meal cooking when he gets home, you answer to someone curt, annoyed, and cold, even to the touch.

then it's the decorating. you thought his couch was a little bare, so now there's a few throw blankets laying across the back of it. there's a vase of pretty tulips on the coffee table. you're growing herbs on the windowsill, little pots of thyme and rosemary and basil. you leave house shoes by the door now, and even when you're not there, he sees those fuzzy pink slippers in the foyer, and he can't help the way he chubs up just seeing them when you're not around.

you start to bring some extra changes of clothes. after the baby spit up on you more than once in a day, you bring a duffel bag with you once a week with extra changes of clothes. he snarls when he sees your clothes in one of his drawers; pretty black panties and matching bras, all laid out under your lounge wear right next to his fucking socks.

the toothbrush next to his in the bathroom. the multi-colored chapsticks in the drawers. tampons and pads organized in the cabinet, your moisturizer next to his shaving cream. he smacks his fist against the wall when he sees the finished package of your birth control in the trash because wot the fuck are y'doing taking those things when y'know i want another--

he can see you in the baby monitor. swaying in the dark of his son's room, the baby's head on your chest as you rock him softly. you're singing a little, a gentle hum to soothe him enough that his eyes start closing. he groans a little when he sees your eyes shut as you kiss his son on the forehead, cooing at him as you pat his little back and tell him to have sweet dreams.

you're making brownies when he comes home that night. his son is seated in his high chair, clapping his hands, and you're smiling at him and cooing in that baby voice you do as you take the warm brownies out of the oven. when you see him emerge from the darkness of his living room, you smile at him, taking off the oven mitts.

"hi, simon," you say softly, and his pupils dilate when you slip a hand over his son's head to soothe him. "i made some dessert, hope that's okay. thought you might wanna try my new recipe."

simon comes into the kitchen as you take his baby out of his high chair. you hoist him up against your hip, and when simon comes closer, you giggle as tilts his head to the side and stares down at you both. you tilt your head back a little, blinking up at him, and the flutter of your lashes is enough to have him rock hard in his cargos as his hands curl into frustrated fists at his sides.

"i'm gonna put him down for bed, it's a little late," you tell him. you hoist his son up a little higher on your hip, picking up his little chubby arm and waving up at simon. "say goodnight, daddy."

simon grins under his mask at the soft lilt of your voice. you try not to squeak when one of his big hands slides around your waist to hold you at your back, and he bends down to kiss his son's forehead through his mask.

"goodnight, my boy."

you try not to linger on the idea that he may have grabbed your ass as you walked away. no, his arms are just so long, they grazed you while you passed by him.

the baby always goes down nice and easy. one bottle later, with a full stomach, he's rubbing his little eyes and fussing in your arms as he tries to fall asleep. he's a mover, simon's little one--always grasping around with his arms and flopping onto his side in the bed. oftentimes, after a nap, he's facing the opposite direction and on the other end of the crib when you come to get him.

so you shouldn't be surprised when as he's falling asleep, his little grubby hands reach for you and pull.

your eyes widen when you hear the pop of buttons. you look down, gasping, when you see his son has grabbed onto the front of your blouse and pulled the first few buttons out. they clatter onto the floor in a mess, and you're not able to see where they go with it so dark in his room.

"oh, god!"

you try to be gentle as you set the baby down in his crib. he immediately sticks his thumb in his mouth with his head lolling to the side, and you try to pick up anything you step on as you hurry out of the room, trying to hold your shirt together.

it's useless. you're standing there in the hallway, hastily shutting the baby's room closed, tits out at eight in the evening.

"tha' why he so good ta ya, mama?"

your eyes bug out of your head when you see simon there. he's standing at the end of the hallway, arms crossed over his chest, and his eyes are focused on your poor open blouse. the bra you're wearing leaves nothing to the imagination--just mesh with underwire, and when simon comes closer, there's virtually nothing separating you when he reaches up with that gloved hand and cups one breast, thumb smoothing over your nipple before he tugs on it gently.

"wha--simon--"

"thinks y'r his mum, pretty tits out like tha'," simon hisses. "'f ya wanted it so bad, why didn't ya just say?"

"simon--"

he tsks, using both hands this time to grip your blouse by the edges and tug it down your arms. it falls around your elbows, and he takes the straps of your bra with it, until it's pooled around your waist and your tits fall free.

"fuckin' hell," he breathes, and your lips part gently as he hikes up his mask and spits on your nipples before sucking them into his mouth. "mmmph..."

you arch your back as he rips the rest of the buttons off with one smooth tug. your blouse falls, and your bra follows it, until you're in nothing but your skirt, backing up into the darkness of his bedroom as he kicks the door shut. you scramble to get him back on top of you when your knees hit the edge of the bed, and you're laying down--grabbing around his shoulders as you try to guide his mouth back to your breasts where he can suckle on them with that filthy mouth of his.

"knew it--" he rasps. "fuck, i knew it--"

your eyes squeeze shut when he ruts his hips against yours. your panties are ruined, slick wet and digging uncomfortably into your folds, but the scratch of simon's jeans have your back bowing at a hard angle, your fingers sliding between your bodies as you reach for his zipper. you gasp when you feel him under your hand, straining against denim, the girth of him tying your stomach in hard knots as you think about what it'll take to get you open enough for him to slip in.

"keepin' me fat," simon murmurs. "holdin' my baby like tha', wot did ya think was goin' ta happen, eh?"

"h-huh?"

"'m gonna make you fat, too, swee'eart," he says, smoothing his hand over your tummy. "saw those little pills in y'r bag. it won't take today, but we'll try again tomorrow, yeah?"

you're drooling as he fucks you. your hips are hiked up, your skirt flipped up as his thighs smack against your ass. you're not privy to the way the fat of you shakes every time he's buried to the hilt, but simon appreciates it, tongue out as he watches you push back against him to try and get yourself filled quicker. he traces your spine with his fingers, leaning over you as he watches your fingers dig into his dark sheets and grip for dear life as he gives it to you fast and deep. it's a mess of wet between you, and you know the bed underneath you will be soaked by the time he's done with you, but you can't think about that when the very thing you've been wanting since the day you met him is so close, so within reach.

you haven't taken a single one of those pills since the first week you met that fat, beautiful baby. maybe simon didn't take too close a look at the dated little pills in your bag and in the bin, the little calendar you used to mark rotting away in a forgotten pocket, gathering dust.

when simon comes, your mouth is filled with saliva, and you gurgle between barely-lucid giggles as your hips sink into the mattress. he's saying something, but you don't hear it. instead you reach down with your fingers and stuff them inside, trying to gather as much of his cum and keep it. when simon tries to cum in your mouth later, you nearly bite his dick off.

how dare he try and waste it?

[cvntroach5000]

LaDS men - "Would you still love me if I was a worm?"

dialogue only, slight crack, 1 gendered term used ("ma'am" by Sylus)

content warning: swearing, implied vore (Rafayel), suggestive themes (Sylus)

Xavier ✨

"Xavier, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

"..."

"...Why are you hesitating"

"Oh, sorry, I'm not. I was just thinking what kind of worm you'd be and what you'd need to be kept happy and safe. I'd need to build you some kind of enclosure... But if you were a worm, how would I know which things you like and which you don't? Worms can't talk. I guess I'd have to learn how to speak worm and watch you really closely."

"I'm sure if anyone could make me a happy worm, it'd be you."

"I'm glad you think so. Still, worms are so small and fragile... Please, don't turn into a worm. I don't think my heart could take worrying so much about you."

"Don't worry, I won't! It's just an internet meme."

"Good. Then it's settled. Neither of us will ever turn into worms. If we have to become animals, let's be cats or birds. Together. So we can talk and be equals."

Zayne ❄️

"Zayne, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

"...Sigh."

"Well? Would you, would youuu?"

"Yes. I would become a worm doctor and make sure you are the happiest, healthiest worm. Is that a satisfying answer?"

"Very!"

"Good. Any other hypothetical questions you'd like to ask?"

"Hmm... What kind of worm do you think I'd be?"

"I'm afraid I'm not familiar enough with different worm species to answer that question in a scientifically accurate way. However, I can guarantee you, you would be a worm that is beloved by Zayne."

Rafayel 🪸

"Rafayel, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

"Uhm, duh?? You'd be the cutest little worm, I'd eat you and keep you safe in my stomach."

"...What"

"What"

"You could've stopped at 'yes' and calling me cute."

"Yeah? Well, what about you? What would you do if I turned into a handsome, talented worm?"

"I wouldn't eat you, that's for sure."

"I guess it'd be a shame to waste such a special worm for a meal. You could make me a little worm art studio and then sell my artworks. That way, I could take care of you, even if I was a worm."

"Do you think worms look tasty, Rafayel"

"Of course I don't! But I think you'd be a delicious-looking, tasty little worm."

"...I'm starting to regret asking."

"I literally did nothing wrong."

"You brought vore into this house!"

"Jesus spoke the truth and they hated him for it, too"

"Who the fuck is Jesus"

Sylus 🥀

"Sylus, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

"Heh. What a strange question. Where did that come from?"

"It's an internet meme."

"Well, of course, I would, sweetie. After all, who could resist an adorable worm like you? I'd find an architect and a gardener to design you the largest, most luxurious enclosure, so that you could have the most opportunity to thrive out of any worm in the universe. Every day, I'd tell you how much I love you. And I'd subdue the world, so they'd worship the ground you burrow in."

"...Sylus, I think we gotta have sex now."

"Oh? I didn't know a bit of worm talk could get you so riled up, sweetie."

"You know this isn't about the worm."

"Haha."

"Take off your clothes"

"Yes, ma'am~"

Caleb 🍎

"Caleb, would you—"

"Yes."

"You don't even know what I was gonna—"

"You were going to ask me if I would still love if you were a worm, right?"

"..."

"The answer is yes. Hundred times yes."

"...It'd be nice if you let me finish my question."

"Oh. Okay! Ask me again, I'll wait this time."

"Caleb, would you still love me if I was a worm?"

"Yes!"

"How did you know what I was going to ask anyway?"

"I heard you the other day discussing the meme with your friends. I figured you'd ask sooner or later."

"Hmph."

"Soooo... Would you love me if I was a worm?"

"You're already a worm and I love you just fine, don't I?"

[shawtuzi]

thinkin’ about bfs!nanami & erwin hehe

cw include: some teasing, lots of praising, oral f!receiving, nanami eats it while erwin’s inside her, a wee bit of pussy slapping, choking, double penetration, unprotected sex, they’re so sweet to her :((

“you’re so pretty y/n.”

“cutest lil thing i’ve ever laid eyes on.”

you preened at the two men’s praise, your freshly done lashes fluttering shut as you leaned into their touch. both of their hands cupped either side of your cheeks, their thumbs running over your jaw and lips.

your two boyfriends were sat at the edge of your shared bed while you knelt before them, body stark naked and ready to be ravaged in the sweetest way possible.

erwin pushed his thumb past your lips, his lips lifting into a loving smile when you began to suck on the digit, your pretty pink gloss smearing against his knuckle. nanami trailed his fingers from your jaw to your shoulder, then into your hair to hair to play with your curls and scratch at your scalp.

“hope you weren’t too lonely without us today sweet thing,” nanami cooed, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. the smell of his cologne had you feeling dizzy, your hands itching to grab at him—but you knew better.

your lips popped off erwin’s finger, your lips forming into a pout. “it was sooo boring, i had nothing to do all day!” the two men smirked at your ranting, you were just too cute for your own good. they both worked at the same office and usually one of them was always home to keep you company while the other was away, but unfortunately today they both were called in.

“why didn’t your hangout with your girlfriends?” erwin asked, lifting you into his lap with ease. he could feel the way your clit throbbed over his dress pants, but he had to focus—his sweet girl was ranting to him after all. you lifted your legs to rest them on nanami’s thighs before speaking. “one is sick, the other was busy, and the other two are vacationing with their boyfriends in the bahamas—which i think should be our next trip by the way.”

nanami lifted your foot up to give your ankle a sweet kiss, his lips lingering for a few seconds before turning his attention back to you. “poor baby. well, we missed you just as much as you missed us,” he smiled at you, rubbing your calf tenderly.

nanami always had really soft hands, in fact he took pride in it. every brush of his skin against yours was filled with more love than your little head could even begin to understand. even when he’d be grasping at your body like he hated your guts when he fucked you his touch was still so sweet, so tender.

as the minutes passed, nanami and erwin took their time, praising you and feeling you up until the insides of your thighs were a slippery mess. “this pussy really is slutty, hm?” erwin hummed, dipping his ring and middle finger between your velvet soft folds. his fingers circled your hole, dipping only the tips of them in before pulling out. “poor baby can’t help how responsive she is,” nanami flashed you a grin, a groan rumbling in his chest when your foot pressed on the crotch of his slacks.

“you mind if i have a taste babydoll?” nanami was speaking to you, but his eyes were on your cunt the entire time. erwin’s fingers were drawing slow figure eights around your clit, occasionally dipping into your entrance to spread your essence around. “yes. please touch me, ken,” out of instinct you hips raised, only to be pushed back down by erwin. “patience, baby, patience. we have all the time in the world.”

while nanami got on his knees, erwin maneuvered your body to push your back against his chest, his arms hooking under the back of your knees. “how pretty,” nanami murmured, his gentle eyes admiring the way your pussy glistened in the light. he thumbed softly at your clit before leaning in, he shoved his tongue in your quivering entrance, moaning at the utter sweetness that is your cunt.

you always tasted so sweet, like the finest honey money could buy, and you always got so wet. each lick was a delightful mouthful for him—it was times like these he found it most hard to stay composed.

erwin spread your legs wider, delighted to see that his two partners were enjoying themselves as they indulged in one another. he loved to be involved, but he also really liked to watch. it was always interesting to see how quickly nanami lost himself in you, and you just took it like the good girl you were because you were their pretty lil toy. theirs to love on, spoil, n’ fuck silly.

nanami suckled on your clit before releasing it with a pop! you whined in protest, kicking your feet as a silent way of telling him to come back. to soothe your whines erwin cupped your breasts, tweaking your nipples until your head tilted back against his shoulder. “sorry sweetness, s’getting a little hot,” nanami made quick work to undo the tie around his neck, he pushed up his sleeves, presenting those beautiful, muscly forearms.

nanami’s tongue circled your clit, he sucked the throbbing bud between his lips, sucking hungrily. “oh f-fuck,” before you could even stop yourself from swearing, it was too late. nanami hummed, biting gently on your clit while erwin pinched both of your nipples rather roughly. “watch your mouth. pretty girls like you don’t swear like that, now do they?” erwin’s lips grazed your ear as he spoke, his fingers rubbing over your nipples to soothe them.

“no . . .”

“speak up. i can’t hear you babydoll.”

even though erwin was speaking to you, nanami’s skillful tongue did not let up, in fact he even went as far as pulling the hood of your clit up to expose you more. be squeezed your thigh three times, silently telling you to answer erwin’s question.

“n-no they don’t, m’sorry sir,” your words were shaky as you apologized, hot tears brimming your lash line. erwin kissed the shell of your ear, grinning at your obedience. “ken would you mind kind me belt?” erwin’s tone was low as he spoke, his composure running thin as his cock strained tighter and tighter against his confines.

it took some time, but kento was able to help erwin pull his slacks and briefs down mid thigh. with no warning erwin slammed you down on his cock in one go, his hand wrapping around your throat to keep you flushed against chest, to keep you from squirming. “full—hah! s-so full sir . . .” your thighs trembled from the stinging stench, but never fear, nanami was there to lick and suck at your clit to distract you from the pain.

“now grind that little pussy on me and make her cum,” erwin groaned, giving your throat a squeeze of encouragement. you slowly began to move your hips, a never ending symphony on moans flying past your lips as erwin’s fat tip nudged against your g-spot. he had more length to him between the two, always so deep in your tummy you could barely form a sentence.

“c’mon pretty thing, stretch yourself out for kenny. gotta make room for him too,” erwin cooed in your ear, spreading your lower lips to give nanami and mouth watering view of your stuffed pussy. nanami gave your clit one last sloppy kiss before standing to his feet, his veiny hands making quick work to undo his belt.

having both of your boyfriends inside you wasn’t something out of the norm, with the amount of size training they helped you through, you could take anything from them.

“you ready for me, my love?” nanami cupped your jaw in his palm, his thumb running softly over the apple of your cheek. god you looked so fucked out. your lips were all drooly, and your pupils were the size of saucers—you looked so precious.

a glob of spit fell from nanami’s lips and onto your clit, dribbling down to where erwin was still sheathed inside you. “she’s fuckin’ soaked, y’should slip in easily,” erwin hummed, patting your clit with his hand, the action making your breath hitch. nanami nibbled on his bottom lip as he traced circles around your clit with his tip, “perfect.”

you’d never fully get used to the stretch of having both of them inside of you, but it’s okay because the amount of praise you received from trying was all worth it.

“such a good girl for us y/n ❤︎”

“you look so cute struggling to take us both, cmon let me see those tears ❤︎”

“you look pretty when you make that face, look at those pouty lips ❤︎”

as praised were flying left and right from them, erwin was putting both his hands to great use. one was rubbing tight, little circles around your clit and the other was pinching and tugging at the nipple. nanami had his hand wrapped around your throat, adding a little pressure each time he slid in an inch.

���almost there anddd—goddamn honey, there we fuckin’ go,” nanami hissed as he pushed in to the hilt. the sight of your stuffed pussy struggling to hold them both had him ready to bust right then and there. speaking of busting—

“i-i’m sorry, i’m cumming! i’m sorry, i’m s-sorry,” you sobbed out, your eyes squeezing shut in embarrassment. you tried to shut your thighs, but erwin just forced them right back open, him and nanami laughing together at how fucking adorable you were.

nanami squished your cheeks together, forcing you to look up at him, “normally you’d be punished for that, but since we left you alone all day we’ll let it slide. don’t let it happen ‘kay babydoll?” his thumb traced over your plush lips, shoving the digit between them a second later. you moaned around his thumb, nodding at him with fat tears in your eyes.

“use your words.”

“yeth sir, thank you,” you squeaked when nanami pushed down on your tongue, opening your mouth wider. he pulled his hips back before thrusting forward, your broken moans sounding like music to his ears.

“such a good girl princess. now sit back and let us breed this cute cunt, yeah?”

[love-belle]

every dead end street led you straight to me !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which no one knows how they're both each other's daylight.

or

for when you find the one you were meant to find all along. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // f1 drivers x platonic!driver!fem!reader // milo manheim x fem!reader

warnings - language

author's note - i am SO sorry for leaving u all but i had my finals going on and now i am DONE with school i just have my college entrance exams left and then im free free FREEEEEE !!!! i love u all sm thank you <333 i hope u like this !!

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yourusername me n baby boy

edit : he says it's baby MAN i disagree ☝️‼️

11,528 comments

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milomanheim ur in her dms i'm on google searching nutrient rich soils i'd keep her in if she was a worm

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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by milomanheim, maxverstappen1, lilymhe and 2,517,986 others

yourusername there are things (inappropriate stuff) i wanna say to u (my BOYFRIEND) but i'll just let u (my COLLEAGUES) live

11,962 comments

username she's so real for this

username speak ur truth queen 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

username her pr team is trying so HARD like i feel like they don't get paid enough to deal with all this

-> yourusername i'll take that as a compliment thank u

username the power couple and we don't even know who he is

-> username mama y papa

-> username honestly they eat up everyone with these pictures

username hidden and secret and private??? girl really picked out her battles

username LOVE LOVE LOVEEEE this for her

landonorris thank you because i saw what you texted him this morning and osc had to physically stop me from bathing with bleach

-> yourusername why are u acting as if u literally didn't just straight up ask us if we "needed a third"

-> landonorris LIES SHE LIES SHE'S A LIAR

-> oscarpiastri mate the entire paddock was there

-> landonorris details but like..........do u

-> yourusername do we what.

-> landonorris ............need a third

-> mclaren oh hello ! guess who just lost their phone PRIVILEGES

username screaming bc they're already parents

-> username he's an absent father but ok

username babe come home the kids and the cats and the cow and that goat miss u ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

username mother never misses

username lewis WISHES he was her

-> yourusername RIGHTTTT

-> lewishamilton roscoe's godmother privileges REVOKED

username f1 grid will never fail to make to laugh bc what do u mean lando asked y/n and the bf if he needed a third and what do u MEAN that y/n is roscoe's godmother

username live laugh toaster bath sayonara 😞

-> username felt this in my bones

milomanheim speak out ur truth queen !!!!!!

-> yourusername i did

-> charles_leclerc is that why he's redder than my car righOH MY GOD PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU

-> yourusername charles LOOK AWAY !!!!!!

-> username no bc

-> username oh

-> username she bout to be yelled at by her manager i can FEEL her anger rn

username that man better know how to fight bc the grid can and WILL come for him if he does something

-> milomanheim i am scared

-> yourusername uh

-> milomanheim for him i mean haha autocorrect

-> username did he just

-> username oh yeah

-> username all that build up and for milo to just

-> username guess who's sleeping on the couch

milomanheim before u say anything

-> yourusername i am SO disappointed rn

-> milomanheim I'M SORRY

-> yourusername :(( i had 3 months of soft/hard launch planned with annotations and notes

-> milomanheim we can still do that!!! anything u want!!!

milomanheim i love u

-> yourusername ok

-> milomanheim girl

-> yourusername wow ok damn i love u more then ig 😒

-> milomanheim ❤️

-> username fuck u both STOP RUINING SINGLE PEOPLE'S LIVES

-> username crazy about them

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, charles_leclerc and 2,317,637 others

milomanheim something about how taylor swift said every dead end street led u straight to me 💘

tagged yourusername

11,628 comments

username I SCREECHED OH MY GOD

username we knew but OH MY GOD THE REVEAL

username and everyone cheered

username roman empire or roman empire

username THAT DOODLE IS SO CUTE WHAT THE FUCK I WILL CRY RN

-> yourusername it's how he won me over

-> milomanheim wait actually

-> yourusername yes 🥰

-> milomanheim i thought it was me saying PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE till u agreed

-> yourusername that probably sealed the deal 💘

-> username i love how he's so "golden retriever" bf and she's "just proud of him in whatever case" gf

-> username truly mom and dad

username i don't wanna hear bitches say love ain't real anymore bc how do u explain THIS

username taylor wrote that song for them trust she told me herself

username WHAT THE FUCK THE LEGO FLOWERS IM CRYING

-> username he set the bar so high it's a dash at this point

username in love with both of them honestly

username crying LOOK AT THEM!!!!!

landonorris how you've both grown up! i still remember the first time she saw you and cried to me about how fucking pretty you are :)

-> milomanheim OHHHH ????

-> yourusername im gonna jump u this weekend WATCH UR FUCKING BACK

-> username nah bc y/n is so real for this

username milo with that drawing is so "what if i told u i'm a mastermind"

-> username NAH HONESTLY

-> username bro prophesied his relationship

username if my relationship isn't like this then i don't want it 💔💔💔

username lord i see how kind u have been to others

username and adding onto my 252719262 reasons we have THIS

username all the love songs in the universe are about them fyi !!!!!!

username AHHSHSHSHDHSJJDJDNX 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

yourusername also about how she said i wanna teach u how forever feels

-> milomanheim nah bc u will like where r u gonna go 🤨

-> yourusername baby we were having a cute moment there

-> milomanheim BABY 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️‼️😬😬😬😬🤞🤞🤞🤞🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯

-> charles_leclerc give him some time he's buffering

-> username something tells me that this is a very regular occurrence

-> oscarpiastri it is

yourusername my baby's fit like a daydream

-> milomanheim 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️❤️❤️❤️❤️‼️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯🥰🥰🥰🥰☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️

-> username what is happening

-> oscarpiastri just give him some time

yourusername not to be a hopeful romantic loser on the main but i find u in every love song i listen to so yea

-> milomanheim look at u being nice for once

-> yourusername boy i will block u

yourusername love u

-> milomanheim who love me

-> yourusername *i* love you

-> milomanheim ilyt

-> username NO HE DID NOT 😭😭😭

-> username bro needs to learn how to hesitate

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by milomanheim, francisca.cgomes, alexandrasaintmleux and 2,785,159 others

yourusername if the whole world was watching i'd still dance with u

tagged milomanheim

12,628 comments

username GOODBYE

username this post right here your honour

username the way i teleported to the railway track

username SCREAMING SJSJTRBCUCJ

username pls block me b4 posting happy stuff (im so happy i cry)

landonorris you can't even order on your own sir DOWN

-> yourusername FUCK UUUUU OMG

username i just ascended to the pearly gates

username DRIVE HIGHWAYS AND BYWAYS TO BE THERE WITH U

-> username OVER AND OVER THE ONLY TRUTH

-> username EVERYTHING COMES BACK TO YOU

-> username i shed tears

username they're literally winning in life BOTH OF THEM

username NOT HIM PEELING ORANGES FOR HER IM GONNA SCREAM

username the orange theory is true and it's real because y/n and milo just proved it argue with air

username is no one gonna talk about how his name is saved as "mylo(ve) <3333"

-> username i had to take SEVERAL deep breaths so as to not break down in front of my family

-> username no one's doing it like them

username IN A WORLD OF BOYS HE'S A GENTLEMAN

*liked by yourusername*

lilymhe with me obviously 🙄

-> yourusername obviously

-> milomanheim 😧

-> alex_albon 😧

username if he doesn't stand outside my window with a sign asking when can he see me HE IS NOT THE ONE

-> username FRRRRR like stop‼️settling‼️for‼️less‼️

username going crazy over these photos like there's SO MUCH content

username y/n feeding us those milo crumbs

-> username nah she gave us whole PLATES with utensils and all ☝️☝️☝️

username i truly cannot wait for milo to be in her garage bc we all know that they're stupidly in love with each other and watching them giggling and smiling and laughing will be much more entertaining than racing

-> username nah bc bro doesn't know how to function with her around

-> username i don't even blame him bc that's Y/N Y/L/N

charles_leclerc how is this relationship gonna work when none of you has the guts to go and say that they got your order wrong

-> yourusername ur saying this as if alex hasn't been the one to go up and say that u asked for no pickles

-> charles_leclerc that was classified information

-> yourusername not anymore 🤗

username i live for y/n terrorizing the grid fueled by nothing but coffee and/or spite

username they're soooooooooooo disgusting im just gonna cry in a corner bc i do not have someone to peel my oranges for me and i have to do it myself like a common peasant

milomanheim i would peel oranges for u forever dw baby i got u 🍊🍊🍊

-> yourusername this is so sweet i cried stfu

milomanheim cannot believe i get to tell everyone ur my gf like OH MY GOD 😭😭😭

-> yourusername bf

-> milomanheim gf

-> landonorris bf AND gf ?

-> yourusername STOP ASKING

milomanheim wdym i cannot love u more than life itself 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 lies bc i do love u more than life itself

-> yourusername i would sacrifice max for u

-> milomanheim doesn't mean that much bc i know u would sacrifice him for a juice box

-> maxverstappen1 OH REALLLLLLLLY

milomanheim angel 🍒

-> yourusername no u

milomanheim u make me feel all golden like daylight

-> yourusername u make me feel all i like shiny things but i'd marry u with paper rings

-> username bye y'all this was fun

-> username brb i need to test if my toaster is waterproof or not

[onlyangel4]

the life i deserve. part six. LN4. OP81

in which reader unexpectedly falls pregnant but her current boyfriend can't say no to his party lifestyle so he leaves her. who better to fill his place than his teammate.

warnings- angst.

faceclaim: hailey bieber

author's note: guys i am getting so close to 1k followers, i shall be doing a 1k event if you have any ideas for what i could do please send them to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

part one // part two // part three // part four // part five

final part

y/ninsta posted a story

written: safe to say luka loves storytime with oscar

op81sightings posted a story

written: oscar spotted out in new york with y/n y/ln

f1wags

liked by user29, user30, user31 and 68,283 others

f1wags: could y/n be back in her wag era. lando's ex girlfriend was pictured cuddling up to oscar piastri on a balcony in new york

view all 10,291 comments

user29: i hope they are together because y/n deserves a real man

user30: they both have publicly friend zoned each other in the past they are not dating, just close

user31: now this couple would be so fucking hot

y/ninsta posted a story

written: luka just bossed his first ever flight

rileywhittall replied to this story: HOLY SHIT ARE YOU IN AUSTIN

y/ninsta: yes we are, can't wait to see you

y/ninsta posted a story

written: fit check

oscarpiastrifan

liked by user32, user33, user34 and 23,198 others

oscarpiastrifan: oscar in the paddock this morning with y/n and baby luka. i know oscar is not luka's dad but he might as well be and that is the cutest thing ever

view all 3,484 comments

user32: twitter said that lando is actually meeting luka today

user33: that is so insane to me because we know pretty much everyone on the grid has already visited him APART FROM HIS OWN DAD

user34: and she is wearing papaya today

user35: i bet in lando's delusional little mind he thinks that she is wearing it for him

op81lover posted a story

written: guys i got paddock passes for my birthday, i just met y/n and oscar they are genuinely the cutest

ln4fan posted a story

written: war is over, lando has finally met luka. oscar was there making sure y/n was okay. i'm just glad lando is making a step in the right direction

y/ninsta posted a story

written: thank you mclaren for kitting baby luka out in full gear

y/ninsta posted a story

written: this man gets p5 and then worries that he embarrassed himself in front of my baby (who slept the entire race)

@bibissparkles

@milkysoop

@hadids-world

@callsignwidow

@barcelonaloverf1life

@queen-of-the-hunt

@piastrams

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@dullypully

@awritingtree

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@pippyth3hippy

@hc-dutch

@whosra

@lancestrollsgf

@dying-inside-but-its-classy

@vulkaari

@minkyungseokie

@random-human02

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@novelswithariana

@exotic-iris13

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@colmathgames2

@ajordan2020

[aerithsfair]

more fluffy langdonmel headcanons because why not

okay we love protective langdon but what if it’s the reverse? they don’t tell anyone aside from the people who absolutely need to know (robby and hr). it’s a crazy saturday shift when the chairs are pact, tensions on the er floor and at chairs are astronomical—langdon takes a fist to the face when a fight breaks out, resulting in a broken nose, a possible concussion from hitting his head on the way down, and a black eye. samira asks if she should call his emergency contact (his ex-wife? maybe? she thinks just because they’re not together doesn’t mean she’s out of his life.)

and despite langdon’s efforts (“i swear to god, i’m fine. she doesn’t need to worry anymore than she already does.” “don’t call her. she needs the day off today.” “robby—jesus christ it fucking hurts!”), robby does it anyway.

“i told you i was fine.” he mumbles to no one in particular when he hears mel’s voice ten minutes later, frantic and asking dana what the hell happened.

“i’m fine, angel.” he tries to pacify but flinches when she touches his nose. “you don’t look fine, frank.” she retorts. it’s cold and passive, but the look etched into her eyes: of worry and concern and oh so much love says otherwise. he almost forgets the many pairs of eyes in their direction. almost. he sees the grin on whitaker’s face, mateo passing a twenty to perlah, a high five shared between santos and mckay. (“since when was mel his emergency contact?” langdon hears samira whisper to robby. “since uh, about six months ago..” he confirms.)

frank hates the healing stage because he can’t kiss mel for longer than a couple seconds and makes it everyone’s problem.

they’re good—great—at what they do. almost too good. knowing what equipment each other needs without having to speak, finishing each others thoughts like they share one brain. it’s magical when they’re paired together but a nightmare for literally anyone else who is with them. one time whitaker got roped into working a case with them and the whole time they spoke in half sentences he almost left the room. (“dr. king, can i get—“ “on it.” “dr. langdon, there’s bleeding in the—“ “i see it.”)

they’re also super professional. for the most part. little touches here and there are saved for moments in passing when they think no one is looking, but the air during a valentine’s day shift catches up to both of them. mel, usually hyperaware contact she’s giving, can’t seem to keep her hands to herself. brushing the hair out of his face, or wiping the sweat off his forehead during downtime spent at the nurse’s station. and langdon is ten times worse than any other day. (“look at my mel, isn’t she beautiful?”). all the staff are tired of him by the end of the shift. like he brings her up to every single patient for no fucking reason other than he can. he also leaves a rose in her locker every hour with little notes because he’s just that obsessed with her.

mel tried to bake him cupcakes which she also left in his locker but she’s terrible at cooking so it doesn’t come out as pretty as she’d like and langdon thinks it’s the cutest thing in the world.

“the least you could do is keep the eye fucking away from patient view.” santos tells him ten hours into the shift. he simply grins, stealing one more look at her. “if being in love is a crime, baby i’ll do the time.” santos leaves to find the nearest trash bin to hurl into.

[avocado-writing]

a short fic from a conversation with @belilwen so thank her for the 'jizz receptacle/dispensary' ideas. she's very fucking funny and I love her.

Peter has given Wade a label maker, and it is the single worst idea anyone has ever had.

Wade is a menace around the apartment at the best of times, and you say that with absoloute love in your heart - but this is a whole new level of maddening. He is a man incensed. You hear the tik tik tik as he punches out a new label every time you close your eyes, and you're not sure if it's real or just started haunting your nightmares.

It was a gift given with no ill-intent. You know this. Peter is a good dude, and when he heard that Wade been having issues with remembering what was in all the tupperware in the kitchen he wanted to help. But Wade has a way of taking even the most inane item and using it to become the world's most annoying motherfucker.

Mayonnaise. Yoghurt. Moisturiser. All of them have been labelled as "jizz dispenser", much to your horror (you only found out when your parents came round for dinner, and in a panic had to throw your Dove handcream out of the fucking bathroom window to stop them from seeing when it wouldn't peel off). Mary runs around with a little "World's Cutest Most Disgusting Dog" affixed to her face. Blind Al even has a "Blind Al" on her glasses.

Then Wade gets brave. He starts labelling Logan.

He seems surprised - if grumpy - as Wade gives him a huge hug that morning, the two of them not really indulging in physical affection outside the bedroom.

"There's my peanut! Good to see you bright and early this morning, sugartits."

Logan grunts as he lets go, heading to grab some cereal. You groan as you see what Wade has slapped on his back. Jizz recepticle.

"Wade, don't label our boyfriend. It isn't nice."

"Label him? Honey, I'd never. Except as bisexual, which is something he really needs to finally start voicing, considering his dick has been inside both of us.”

Logan flips him the bird as you peel the sticker off. Wade opens his mouth to keep talking and you shove it onto his lips, a far more fitting place in your opinion, especially considering what happened in the bedroom last night.

“Stop harassing us. I love you but rein it in a bit, sweetheart.”

“Or I’ll snap the damn thing in half,” Logan grumbles, and you’re both unsure if he means Wade or the machine.

“Ugh, fine,” Wade pouts. Grabs the label maker again. Types out a “sorriest, sexiest boyfriend” and sticks it on his head. You roll your eyes, fondly.

“That one can stay.”

[kings-highway]

also in honour of my new phone, here are some phone based haikyuu headcanons for the bastards. usual ships apply. below the split bc its l o n g !

- Daichi resists getting a new phone like his life depends on it. he will repair, refurbish and reuse the one he has for as many years as humanly possible. when he does eventually get forced by time or circumstance to get a new one he is incredibly contrary to anything with new features and would like one that was like his old phone, thank you

- contrarily, Sugawara needs to be talked down from getting every new phone that gets released and voiding his 2 year contract. he's not even a brand loyalist literally just any new phone.

- yamaguchi is an iphone loyalist and has unironically said the "idk man the layout is just so easy :("bc he's clinging to the idea that there's some kind of social clout with iphones

- tsukishima fcking hates this and its one of the only real arguments yamaguchi and him have. tsukishima has some weird obscure phone brand that's apparently way higher tech but isn't compatible with most mass produced equipment

- noya has a cracked phone screen and has always had a cracked phone screen and sugawara is concerned about him because he's pretty sure he got a new phone recently, but the screen is cracked...

- asahi has the highest quality phone case you can get. he's not concerned about being clumsy, he's concerned about noya getting to his phone too.

- kiyoko has the cutest fucking phone case you can imagine. it's so pretty and artsy and nice

- yachi put cute stickers on her phone case

- kageyama has never thought more than eight seconds about his phone and just buys whatever the hell the guy at the kiosk tells him to.

- Oikawa likes nice phones and likes having something he can show off passively so he's always offering to take selfies/pictures because his phone camera is incredible

- iwaizumi also has a very cracked phone screen and he pretends like he has no idea how this happened but the truth is he knows exactly how it happened, he dropped it off a second floor balcony and doesnt want to admit it

- makki once lost his phone down a sewer grate

- ushijima had been using his parents old phones most of his life, so when he needs to get a new one, Leon, Tendou and Semi all fight over trying to help him and pitching their own preferences for what's "best"

- Tendou buys ushiwaka a little volleyball phone charm that he thinks is the funniest thing in the world. Tendou will catch him just, like, flicking it around in great amusement and nobody can figure out what about it he finds so entertaining

- Tendou has a French interface/language setting that is his default and literally nobody on the team who saw him using this assumed he spoke the language they all just thought he was Like That

- Semi has a broken phone screen also.

- Goshiki also has a broken phone screen. He saw a spider and panicked and dropped it.

- Bokuto doesnt have a cracked phone screen and this consistently surprises people

- Akaashi does have a cracked phone screen and he gets mad if someone asks about it

- Akaashi also always has a very nice phone and tends to upgrade pretty frequently. He's got all the fancy pieces too, wireless headphones and brand name charging cable.

- Kuroo has a phone so old it should be a crime to keep it alive

- Kenma's phone is his least favourite piece of tech he carries. it doesnt even have any good games. He sort of hates dragging it around because all it can do is text or call other people and why would he want to do that? He does have a cute case though.

- Fukunaga has a broken phone and when someone asks how it happened he just giggles.

- shocking everyone, Sakusa actually is pretty interested in updating his phone and having nice things. He just doesnt bother advertising his nice stuff/which brand/what features

- Kita is infamous for not replying to texts. It surprises people because he's so consistent in everything else, but because of those routines he doesnt get easily distracted and doesnt check his phone while on tasks. So if you need something from him between the hours of 3-7 you're out of luck because those are the hours he's doing homework, yardwork, and cleaning, and he simply will not think to look at his phone. It sits on his bedside table in his room, forgotten.

- Atsumu once broke his phone screen and tried to pass it off as Osamu's and this didnt work for literally just any of the million reasons it wouldnt

- Aran still complains about flip phones going away.

- Suna has some fancy phone thats super high powered and high tech and the twins still make fun of him for not having whatever phone is most popular at any given time. Suna is incredibly protective of his phone and won't let other people use it for anything.

Phone Background Headcanons! - ships included here!

- Daichi had one of the random free backgrounds for like two years until he started dating Suga and switched it to a picture of them (at suga's behest he do so)

- Suga has some really old selfie with Asahi and Daichi from their first year in which they all look terrible but it always makes him smile so he keeps it

- Asahi has a picture of the sunset he took

- Noya has some stupid motivational quote

- Yamaguchi and Tsukki have matching phone screens, two halves of the same photo. Tsukki got heavily coerced into this, but really doesnt mind

- Hinata has some weird volleyball moodboard he found online he thought looked cool

- Kageyama has the preset background. Hinata changes this to one of them after they start dating. Kageyama cant do anything about it because he doesnt know how to change it.

- Kiyoko has a picture of her family

- Yachi has a some pretty aesthetic patterned background

- Oikawa has a team photo of the seijoh 4 as his lockscreen, but his phone screen is just iwa making a goofy face (He hadnt known a photo was being taken)

- Iwa has a very, very nice photo of Oikawa. He had always insisted 100% that he would never do it, but the photo was just so perfect and he looked so nice he broke his rule

- Makki and Mattsun have matching phone screens that put together make their hands make a heart. The weird thing is they did this when they werent dating.

- Tendou changes his phone background often to whatever photo he thinks is funniest or cutest at any given time. Changes pretty much once a week.

- Ushijima has a picture of him and Tendou that often shocks people because it's very cute and romantic and then he'll just be staring back at them irl with his characteristic impassivity and people arent sure if the photo is really him or some weird doppelgangar.

- Semi has some cool aesthetic music background people make fun of him for

- Leon has a picture of his dog, probably

- Bokuto has a picture of himself

- Akaashi is too anxious to personalize his phone so he keeps it preset. Eventually Bokuto sets it to a picture of himself. (Before they started dating. Akaashi oddly never changed it...)

- Kuroo has a very bedhead-early-morning picture of Kenma

- Kenma has the main character from one of his favourite games. Kuroo cannot convince him to set him as his screen. The more he insists, the stronger Kenma gets

- Lev probably has an anime girl for his background. I love him but.

- Sakusa has that auto rotate feature for a collection of stock footage of landscapes

- Atsumu changes his background pretty frequently because he cant decide. half the time he puts the most terrible photo he can find of his friends

- Osamu just has some old photo from a family vacation, probably including a dog that has since passed away he cant bear to change

- Kita had a team picture set as his lockscreen - he has a picture of Aran for his homescreen, but nobody knows this since he never uses his phone in public.

- Aran set a picture of Kita the second they started dating. He rotates it out based on his favourite picture of the month.

- Suna has some stupid "warning" to whoever is reading it to put his phone down if they havent been given permission

---

my new phone has ! in the place my old phone had , so this post really wanted to be very excited. petition to put headphone jacks back in phones. got myself some unpopular phone the guy had to call his supervisor to learn how to sell bc it was the only model with a headphone jack and he'd never process the sale for one before. I'll die on this hill.

[scissorcentral]

Abby with a reader who's just •_• bug eyed and silent lmao, very oblivious to everything, always in their own world, but very endearing and sweet to abs <3

Abby with a more silent reader-

warnings- (there aren't really i don't think)

-Abby literally thinks you are the most adorable human being ever. Whenever you space out during group discussions, she literally can't help but laugh to herself before slinging her arm around you and holding you against her until you come back to reality (because of course you're always directly next to her).

-If anyone tries to make little jokes or tease you about your speaking habits or anything about you, she will shut them up so fast you literally won't even have time to notice. It gets a point where nobody even thinks about trying because Abby will either clap back, aiming to destroy their ego, or give them the most insane death glare. Like the type of look that could kill, and it probably could if she tried hard enough.

-You can't help but mess with her fingers and drift off sometimes and she literally will have like hearts in her eyes as she watches you. You're completely silent just running your fingers all over her hands and she will just watch in awe with a soft blush on her cheeks. She's literally enamored by you and whatever you do.

-Whenever you are out on patrol together, she ALWAYS makes sure to keep an eye on you no matter what. She knows you can get a little off track, your mind sometimes wandering causing you to wander a bit to. After her dad's death she refuses to lose you so she makes sure to never let you out of her sight as long as she can help it.

-Sometimes you guys will sneak off and find a building with an accessible roof and you will just sit for hours. Sometimes you guys won't even speak, and other times Abby will talk for the entire time as you listen to every word she says. Sometimes its rant and other times it's some stupid store that sends you both into a fit of giggles. Her main goal is always getting some laughs out of you which she always does, rant or not. She lives for the sound of your laughter.

-Her dream is to be able to see the world through your eyes. How you are able to get through most of your days without talking or talking so little. How you can be so oblivious to things but also so insightful to other things. She is so obsessed with you and how you go about your life. She wishes she could know what it's like, but even though she really can't she does everything in her power to understand you.

-Before you guys got together, Abby had been literally in love with you, but you never noticed her advances. She would get so angry, like screaming into her pillow angry. It would make her so embarrassed how pathetic she'd get but she still continued to try. Eventually you caught on after she had to be so extremely blunt. Now the whole thing is something she just teases you about, but your obliviousness is something she has grown to completely love. It's so cute to her now(it wasn't cute when she was putting her reputation on the line with her extremely obvious advances(well obvious to everyone but you))

-If you ever get lost in your head she's always there to try and ease you out. It becomes a thing she is really good at. Holding you close to her, her thumbs rubbing softly over your skin, light kisses on your temple. It's sweet and something you become incredibly grateful for. You will always show your appreciation by leaving a new coin on her nightstand that you had secretly found on a patrol.

-Abby makes it her fucking mission to see you smile. Whatever she has to do she will do (which can be a little concerning). She thinks your smile is the cutest thing in the world and would literally die to see it once more.

-If anyone in the stadium says legit one negative word about you, she will lose it. Nobody is allowed to talk bad about you. Ever. She is so extremely protective of you. You're her everything. She knows you aren't classified as a "completely normal person" by everyone's else's standards but that's why she loves you so much. The way your eyes will glaze over slightly when you space out, the way you'll just stare at people when they send you a backhanded compliment, and the way she's the only person who gets to hear you speak and even then, it's usually quiet whispers. You've got her completely whipped. You got the Abby Anderson completely and utterly whipped.

notes- Hi. I am actually horrified to post this as I haven't written and posted on Tumblr in multiple years so it's weird to be back. This is such shit, but I hope you do enjoy. To me this writing feels like a fourth grader who just learned a few new vocab words but whatever. I'll probably go back and fix it and add more but I'm still having a crisis from just writing this so we will see. Hope you like it.

(also i didn't know how to word the title but i tried.)

[mymoshangthoughts]

more of my mobingshang agenda lolol

but oki to keep from complicating matters, this is an au where shen yuan never transmigrates. so he's off living his happy cucumber life and buying his binghe merch while cursing that hack of an author.

MEANWHILE that hack of an author got grand-slammed into the story he wrote, as per canon, and he is Trying His Fucking Best To Survive Okay. And he thinks he's doing an okay job of it too! He avoided interacting too much with the protagonist during his disciple days, but when they did run into each other he made an effort to make a good impression on his future emperor.

things were going Just Fine until the day that binghe accidentally found out there was a demon sleeping on an ding peak using his dream demon powers. w/o shen yuan to distract him, he's already been gathering intel on all the peaks AND BOY IS THAT SOME INTEL. but now binghe is big curious about this demon. is the demon like him? someone who joined the sect without knowing what they were? or were they a demon spy? what were they doing on an ding of all places?

so binghe decides to take a good long peek into this demons dreams, just to get a feel for what sort of person he is and theres mobei jun in all his booby glory, the sexiest man binghe has ever seen in his entire fucking life.... who is dreaming about napping? literally. thats the dream. mobei jun is taking a cat nap in the snow by a tree with a satisfied expression on his face. clearly the demon likes the cold.

it's a really stupid a simple dream but its just... cute? binghe is kinda dying over how cute it is. how much does this guy like napping? but also this tells binghe next to nothing about the identity of the strange an ding demon so he really should prod the dream to gather intel. but he kinda cant bring himself to? and he winds up letting mobei just dream bc he's so cute, determining that he can prod the dream next time

binghe watches a few of mobei's dreams that way. sometimes mobei is fighting in his dreams, sometimes he's napping or reading, and sometimes peak lord shang appears in the dreams, just kinda scrambling away in that undignified way that he does. which isnt actually surprising, mobei is on an ding so of course the people around him might appear in his dreams and the peak lord is the person who sticks out the most. binghe has certainly had more than one terrible dream involving shen qingqiu. at least peak lord shang seems to just be an inept peak lord and not a cruel one, binghe can respect that

binghe's irl investigations of an ding arent proving very fruitful tho. he cant find a disciple with mobei's appearance anywhere on an ding and he is LOOKING, but perhaps he has some sort of appearance distorting magic? he does have some undeniably demonic features so that would make sense

anyway, binghe doesn't end up interfering in the dream until he winds up in a nasty one from mobei's childhood and he is PISSED bc he now has a fair idea how this guy wound up stuck in the human world, but also who could dare be cruel to baby mobei?! he's literally the cutest thing on the planet!

so binghe shows up in the memory dream and scoops up child mobei, carrying him away from the danger and transforming the dream around them to be something pleasant that mobei would like. snow and creatures and books and hoenstly binghe is getting the best kind of power trip from watching mobei's face just light up as he's saved from his terrible dream

and okay, binghe is very invested now. what's the harm in just... showing up in mobei's dreams? ya know, just on and off. he's another face in the sect. it's easily explained away as "oh a random shidi appears in my dreams lol dreams are so weird" and binghe takes to interacting with mobei in the dreams. just small things. sitting next to him while he naps or asking about what he's reading or helping him in fights and it's just Really Nice to be with him

mobei doesnt talk much and he's either terminally awkward or super shy, or maybe both, but binghe gets really happy over every time he's able to get mobei to talk to him

except

except the most fucking common topic is shang fucking qinghua.

look, binghe has nothing against the an ding peak lord. he really doesnt. qinghua's been nothing but a good shishu to him. but it's just... really annoying to him somehow that he spends so much time and effort to get mobei to open his mouth to talk about what he's reading and what comes out of his mouth is something inane like "qinghua's writing is better" and what's with that? 'qinghua'? not shizun? not shifu? not even shixiong or shidi? QINGHUA?

WHAT IS THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND CAN QINGHUA PLEASE JUST DIE THANKYOU

binghe isnt quite blackened yet so he's still feeling a lil ashamed over being so possessive and cruel in his thoughts but fr, if he has to hear another "the pelt will be for qinghua" after they hunt a beast together in the dream world, binghe might actually do something very unfilial to his dear shishu

hedging, binghe decides to prod the dreams so that he can understand the relationship between mobei and qinghua better. directing it to a random dream about their past together. he's expecting something about maybe them being disciples of the same generation but what he is NOT expecting is to find himself in a cramped inn where qinghua was circling mobei like a fucking octopus and nearly licking him where a younger (and INJURED) mobei is looking quite flustered and unsure what to do before shoving qinghua off the bed

and what exactly the fuck was that? binghe needs CONTEXT. but the dream ended before he got more because mobei woke up and oki, now binghe is going to investigate the fuck out of his damn shishu. HOW DARE HE HUG MOBEI LIKE THAT BEFORE BINGHE GOT AN OPPORTUNITY TO HOLD MOBEI LIKE THAT, HE IS DROWNING IN VINEGAR RN THANKYOU

and now qinghua is freaked the fuck out bc his protag son is Paying Attention To Him. making an effort to make conversation and make excuses to run errands to an ding and Yep, that Cannot bode well actually. it doesnt help that his king has been acting a bit strange lately as well.

not necessarily angry or mean. just kinda... distracted. like his attention is elsewhere. and ya know what? qinghua kinda resents it oki. bc even tho his king is mean and grumpy and a spoiled tyrant and a total jerk, his king usually pays more attention to him? and this split focus is stressing qinghua out a lot. so he's doubling his efforts to please his king while trying to dodge the protagonist and His Life Is Stress

and then the immortal alliance happens and qinghua thinks its mostly gonna go as planned, except NOT bc mobei jun shows up in person and looks noticeably shocked when he meets binghe. and binghe looks shocked too?? and the system is freaking out and shen qingqiu shows up to be scummy so things SHOULD be back on track except--

except mobei jumps into the abyss after binghe?! WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING EXACTLY AND WHEN EXACTLY DID IT HAPPEN AND FUCK QINGHUA DOESNT KNOW WHY HE JUMPED IN AFTER THEM BOTH, HE REALLY HAS NO FUCKING EXPLANATION, ITS THE STUPIDEST THING HE'S EVER DONE

cue abyss arc but it's qinghua and binghe passive aggressively fighting each other for mobei's attention all through the abyss 🤣 just the cattiest of fights between them that also results in Tension between them bc theres also attraction there pfff but they're both too fixated on how badly they want mobei to really pay attention to that

[munsonismymuse]

Steve had a very heated argument with his parents who arrived home unexpectedly. It was an argument filled with crying, anger, and a lot of pain.

So he made a decision that was unreasonable and not at all safe. But a world full of strange creatures had taken away his last years of adolescence without being able to enjoy them and he still had to deal with those arguments with his parents, if life could not give him a break, he had the right to commit some stupid things.

So when he managed to calm his crying a little, he asked Eddie to sneak in through his window. Which Eddie did.

If his parents found them, it would be the end. Robin definitely would kill him but none of that mattered when Eddie was between his legs, moving slowly and silently, Steve was ecstatic, with saliva building up in his mouth, he was making the cutest moans just to show his boyfriend how much he was enjoying it, he could feel Eddie all over his body, because he was hitting the exact spot of pleasure even though he was doing his best to be as quiet as possible.

"My little princess so spoiled and so needy" Eddie whispered. "What would you do if mom and dad found you like this?"

Steve responded by moving his body, fucking himself against Eddie's body, taking what he needed from him. He had been with many girls while their parents were home but this was the first time he had been on that side of history and he was loving every second of it.

"That's it, princess, you gonna show them how good you are taking me, right?"

"Mmm huh, yes Eddie, please"

"Shhh, babydoll, be quiet, show them I've made a good boy out of you"

Eddie put a hand over Steve's mouth because he knew he was getting close and he knew how loud it was, the adrenaline was pushing them to the limit, with his free hand he pressed hard on the boy's hips to keep him on his dick, to keep him still, to avoid the noise of the bed and to be able to use him as Eddie wanted. He began to move faster, Steve began to cry, his face was flushed, his hands were trying to take pieces of Eddie's body, his hands were moving in the air helplessly as if he wanted to get away from the pleasure Eddie was giving him but at the same time chasing that pleasure and craving more and more.

If anyone approached Steve's room, it was impossible for them not to notice what was going on.

"That's all, right love? All you needed to behave was a good cock inside you"

"Yesss, Eddie, please"

"See? I have made you a good girl, a very polite girl who knows how to ask for what she needs, im so proud of you darling"

Steve's mouth opened in a silent scream, he began to cum, squeezed Eddie and began to move slowly. Steve was shaking non-stop and the tears on his face wouldn't stop flowing, his eyes were closed and his mouth moved with Eddie's every movement.

"I love you" Eddie whispered as he kissed his cheek, still moving, he was pursuing his own cumming, slowly, unhurriedly. "You're mine, mine, just mine, not theirs."

Steve felt his body melt, he feel loved.

"You'll be my husband one day, i will take you far away from here, baby. I promise, just be patient"

Eddie cums inside him, Steve smiled with his eyes closed as he felt it.

Eddie slipped his fingers into Steve's mouth, who slowly opened his eyes. He soon got the message and began to wet the older man's fingers, a few seconds was enough, Eddie kissed his nose to let him know it was enough.

Eddie moved his fingers closer to Steve's entrance, asking for permission.

"May I?"

"Of course, Eds." Steve whispered.

Eddie inserted his fingers inside Steve and using his cum and Steve's saliva to move them quickly and easily. Steve bit down on his lip to keep from moaning loudly, Eddie quickly moved to his prostate, using it as he pleases. It was easy to make Steve cum once again, Steve felt himself really wet.

Eddie lay there for a few minutes hugging Steve, who slowly began to fall asleep. Before sleep overcame Eddie too, he slowly got up and quietly got dressed, he couldn't stay in Steve's room.

"Be a good boy and take care of yourself until we see each other in the afternoon" Eddie whispered.

At 3:54 a.m. Eddie kissed Steve's sleeping face and climbed down the window.

[archangeldyke-all]

ANGELBEARRRR!!! IM GLAD YOU’RE FEELING BETTER MY BABY 🤎🤎🤎 i’ve had this thought floating around in my head for months but i can’t be arsed to write it so it’s yours now 🤭

imagine sleeping over at sevika’s place (probably before you move in together) and it’s getting late so she’s like “alright… well… lemme go get my jammies on…” and she comes back wearing FULL bear pjs, like she has a sleep shirt with a bear on it, bear pants, a bear ears headband to keep her hair out of her face, those ugly bear slippers, and she’s holding a teddy bear or two… and you just take a second to realize that THIS is the scary lady of zaun….

hehehehe i love youuuuuu

ENNABEAR I PASSED OUT FROM CUTENESS OVERLOAD OH MY GOD also this reminds me of some fantastic @dykesevika fanart that i will reblog so u guys can soak up the bear sevika vision. ooh ooh also shoutout to @fyeahnix as always for creating the adorable, perfect nickname for sev: sevi-bear. EEEEK

men and minors dni

you and sevika have been dating for about half a year now. you've spent the night at both your places, but those have always been sleepovers after sex, rushed and unplanned.

tonight, for the first time, you're having a sleepover. sure, you might end up having sex at some point, but that's not the point of tonight. the point of tonight is for you and sevika to just spend the evening together, giggling and gossiping and watching movies.

sevika ordered pizza, you built a nice little nest on her couch, and you've been each other's arms since then.

"where're you going?" you pout as your girlfriend tries to escape your arms. she chuckles.

"i wanna get my jammies on before the food gets here. you look so cozy in yours." she whines. you chuckle and shoo her away.

"fine, but hurry. i'm cold without you.

sevika grins and darts to her bedroom. you're curious to know what her jammies are-- she's only slept in boxers and socks beside you.

you're expecting her to wear a t-shirt and flannel bottoms, or something simple like that.

you certainly aren't expecting the full-body bear onsie, with a hoodie included, two little brown ears popping up on her head. her feet have little cloth claws embroidered into them. you almost pass out.

"oh. my. god."

"what?" sevika asks, frowning and crossing her arms over her chest, grumpily.

"sevika. did you buy that for me?" you ask.

sevika huffs and rolls her eyes. "no, these are my winter jammies."

you finally let out the squeal that's been bubbling up inside you, falling onto your back to kick your legs. sevika glares at you the entire time. you pull a pillow to your face to muffle your squeal.

eventually, sevika storms over and pulls the pillow away from your mouth. "don't suffocate yourself, jackass."

"sevika, this is the cutest fucking thing i've ever seen in my entire fucking life! you coo, pulling her down to rest on top of you. sevika grunts. you just giggle.

"they're... cozy." she tries to defend. you cackle.

"i'm sure they are, sevi-bear."

sevika groans at her new nickname. you pull her hood back so you can plant a wet smooch on her forehead.

"bears are my favorite animal, y'know." she pouts. you nod, your excited smile not fading in the slightest at the new information.

"any specific species?" you ask.

it's the right question. sevika perks up in your arms, and her embarrassment melts as a sparkle glimmers in her eye. "y'know there's only eight species of bear in the world?" she asks with wonder. you raise an eyebrow at her.

"no way, there's gotta be more."

"no! polar bear, brown bear, american black bear, asian black bear, sun bear, panda bear, and andean bear. that's it."

"what about koala?" you ask. sevika snorts and bites your neck. you cackle. "so, which one is your favorite?" you ask, nudging her butt with your heel. your heart does a somersault when you feel a plush little tail sewn on the back of her jammies.

"brown bear. obviously." she huffs, gesturing at herself.

"obviously." you giggle, kissing her. "and which one am i?" you ask.

sevika studies you for a second before speaking with a mischevious smirk. "panda."

you giggle. "why panda?"

"'cause they're useless on their own in the wild."

you gasp and kick her harder. sevika bursts into giggles. "i'm not useless!"

"well, you're not exactly brown-bear-ferocious."

"oh please. brown bears hibernate through winter and eat honey and salmon in the summer. deep down you just wanna be spoiled."

sevika sputters and glares at you, but before she can argue further, the doorbell rings with your pizza.

you giggle as you watch her shoulders fly up to her ears. "will you get it?" she asks meekly-- not wanting to be seen by a stranger in her cute pajamas.

you giggle and kiss her nose. "'course i will, sevi-bear."

you roll your eyes as you turn to answer the door. ferocious brown bear my ass. she's more like a teddy bear.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner

@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther

@lavenderbabu @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart

@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette

@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp

@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner

@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke

@strawberrykidneystone @vkumi @fict1onallyobsessed @dvrkhcld @sweetybuzz25

@sluttysierraaa @snake-in-a-flower-crown @ruiwonderz @littlemisszaunite @biblicalcrybaby

@blackgaladriel @nightlyconfusion @dancingqu33n17 @losernb @p1nkearth

taglist!!

@sevikas-baby @ghostscandys

[holybibly]

Hello my favorite bunnies. I won't let you relax for a minute.

These are my unholy thoughts

The Park twins were definitely something very special.

When you first met Seonghwa, it was hard to believe that he could be the twin brother of someone like Hwaseong, and vice versa.

They were the hottest topic in the office, and as the children of the CEO of the company you were working at, they were frequently spotted around the office.

Seonghwa was the cutest person on the planet. God, you could have sworn there was an angelic halo around his pretty head, and those big innocent eyes… Damn it, all you wanted to do was ruin him. There was something so sweet about him that it made your teeth ache with the desire to sink into that delicious caramel skin of his.

At the same time, Hwaseong was his complete opposite - brash, belligerent and vulgar to the point of disgusting, you couldn't be around him for more than a minute without your panties getting uncomfortably wet. And unlike Seonghwa, you were desperate for Hwaseong to destroy you.

You never thought that you would be in the middle of it when the boys started their internship at the company. Mr. Pak was personal request that you take care of them and help them in any way possible.

And as it turned out, "all their affairs" also included the satisfaction of their insatiable libido.

It was a bit of a push-pull for you three. The desire to push Seonghwa into a dark closet and show him what heavenly blowjob meant became stronger and stronger. Especially when he looked at you with those sparkling eyes and batted his long eyelashes.

At the same time, you wanted to smother that arrogant bitch face of Hwaseong with your own pussy. The whole situation made you feel as if you were between heaven and hell at the same time.

Neither of you dared to make the first move, despite the intense tension and the almost painful sexual desire between you.

Everything changed at a company dinner. Seonghwa was lightweight and quickly got drunk, getting clingy and overly tactile with you, while Hwaseong seemed to get even cockier, starting to touch you unprofessionally and not innocently.

You had to drive them home before Hwasung performed a striptease on the table. God, he was literally five minutes away from taking his clothes off. And Seonghwa started to whimper about how much he wanted to go home to his soft bed. The boy was literally the sweetest creature that could have ever existed in the world.

But you were a damn fool to fall for their blandishments and take them home. And you were an even bigger fool to think that they believed that their typical behaviour characterised them in the bedroom.

Things did not turn out as you had hoped when Seonghwa literally fucked the life out of you in the middle of the hallway of their luxurious penthouse and Hwaseong obediently sucked your fingers while waiting for his turn. The huge innocent eyes were black as night and full of lust, while the bold lips that had curved into a devilish grin had become soft and gentel.

The night was going to be long, exhausting and hot, judging by the eagerness with which they tried to get enough of you. Biting, licking, kissing, scratching and fucking you as if their lives depended on it. For you, the morning came just as suddenly as the change in their behaviour last night, but what drove you even crazier was how gentle Seonghwa was with you again, and the way that annoying arrogance once again coloured Hwaseong's beautiful features.

Anyway, you were right about one thing - the Park twins really were something special.

[mymarifae]

these two are linked in some way. 100%. i'm hesitant to add mem to the theory board because idk if they'll be related to march too or just cyrene (being an entity that sort of embodies cyrene's... essence? like ELF elysia in hi3) but the similarities they have with Both are too big to ignore completely

unsure if they're about to go the route of cyrene and march being the same person or if march is simply like... a fragment of cyrene that was sealed and sent away to maybe give her a chance to live on since this girl is doomed to die in virtually every universe and iteration. amphoreus's time and space displacement is fucked up and it seems like we're going to be spending a lot of the adventure split across concepts of "past," "present," and "future." so that mayyyyy be why we were able to see cyrene interacting with and talking to stelle in the nameless faces video, if she's no longer "whole"/dead/...whatever.

she does appear to be emerging from a place of... non... physicality. also it's worth noting that in the first picture of her i included, she's sinking - into water or a water-like substance. that can presumably freeze over...... and become the ice block himeko and welt found march 7th in....... hm? 🤨

it's hard to say how much cyrene will have in common with elysia - it's unfair to expect them to be the exact same character, and maybe these points i'm about to bring up mean little in the end because we don't know for sure where the story is going to go, but

elysia was "born from nothing" which doesn't quite have the same connotations as march 7th's "birth" but you know. they both found themselves in a sudden state of existence with next to nothing to fall back on and they defined themselves

elysia is not humble about her beauty and speaks often of it (as she should; she is very pretty). similarly, march frequently boasts about her cuteness and describes herself as the cutest girl in the world (as she should; she is very cute)

"never forget your roots" is one of the mantras elysia lives by. this stands out to me because despite not... really needing those memories, march is pretty insistent on remembering her past. the lesson that the garden of remembrance and just the universe and her adventures in general have tried to teach her ("your present defines you; so long as you're happy here, you don't need the memories of your past, and retrieving them might destroy what you've come to love now") just doesn't appear to be sinking in. perhaps because she subconsciously has a core belief stating the opposite

as for how mem would fit into this i have nothing for you because we don't have anywhere near enough info on them for me to begin thinking about that. but it seems like they'll be a pretty big deal.

like i'm spitballing more than anything here. if march IS a fragment of cyrene i think it's also obvious that she has grown into her own, entirely separate person and her origins are inconsequential - though she might not think that if/when she learns this about herself. that might also offer an explanation for why the garden of remembrance won't let her have any part of her old memories, not even a hint. because learning that she's technically a piece of someone else might be too heavy a blow to her sense of identity and she'll be entirely too focused on all the wrong things. uncovering her past will slow her down at the most inopportune moment... make her vulnerable in all the worst ways. which might be why she appears so absent from the adventure.

it's also possible that like. all three of these guys - march, cyrene, and mem - are fragments of a titan (don't ask me which). or that march was given cyrene's coreflame (don't ask me which) before being catapulted into space. or march was the previous owner of the coreflame cyrene has now - if they can be passed on to other people - before being catapulted into space. or i mean, the coreflame cyrene HAD because i'm not convinced this girl's fully alive and well. mem IS the coreflame, brought to life/imparted with cyrene's memories and will.

do you see... there's just so very much to think about... looooots of story spoilers got thrown at us if we can just... untangle the mess... can anyone HEAR me

[cieloclercs]

congrats on your 1K you deserve it‼️‼️

when you have the time could you write for lewis hamilton + nepo!reader ( male or female ) who is an actress / actor?

king of my heart — lewis hamilton

pairing. lewis hamilton x nepo baby!actress!reader

genre. social media au

face claim. gigi hadid

warnings. mentions of age gap, swearing, some online hate, lewis and reader are literally the hottest couple ever, daniel lowkey trolling lando, sex jokes ??, mixed up met gala years sorryyyy, some inaccuracies with race outcomes shshsh

author’s note. hello anon! thank you for being my first request for my 1k event 🥰 i wasn’t sure if you wanted an imagine style thing or not so i’ve gone for a social media au. hope that’s ok ! if not just let me know and i can redo this for you <3

liked by kaiagerber and 4,739,725 others

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username imagine being able to say you’re dating THE y/n y/l/n i’d never fucking shut up about it

username it’s a good job lewis doesn’t shut up about it then 😭

liked by yourusername and 59,136 others

themetgalaofficial This year’s hottest couple, award-winning actress Y/N Y/L/N and seven-time Formula 1 World Champion, Sir Lewis Hamilton, grace the Met Gala red carpet 🤍

username she’s everything. he’s just ken.

username you did not just call LEWIS HAMILTON ‘just ken’ 😭

username she doesn’t deserve him 🤢🤢

username seriously what does he see in her?? she’s completely talentless. the only reason she’s managed to land ANY acting job is because of her father. she’s a fucking fraud. 🙄

username no need for the negativity honey, lewis still isn’t going to fuck you x

*yourusername liked this comment

username SHE DID NOT 😭😭 WHAT AN ICON

username omg y/n looks like a goddess 😍 and lewis is there too i guess…

username fucking nepo baby. fuck off and blow daddy’s money somewhere else u whore 🖕🖕

username i smell jealousy…

username 😂😂 what’s there to be jealous of?

username maybe the fact that y/n is a thousand times richer and more successful than you will ever be OF HER OWN MERIT…oh and the fact she’s fucking lewis hamilton every night, which you so clearly want to do from the BLATANT jealousy your comments reek of 😘

username ATE AND LEFT NO CRUMBS

username ma’am, you dropped this 👑

username SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK 🎤🎤

username oh, y/n’s stylist has outdone herself with this one 🤩

username MOM AND DAD

username they’re so 😩😩😩

username i want them both so bad 🫠

username who’s the arm candy in this relationship? 🤔

username i’d say y/n because she’s prettiest…but lewis. it’s definitely lewis.

*yourusername liked this comment

username somehow i just know she walks him like a DOG

yourusername thank you for having us ☺️🤍

themetgalaofficial It’s our pleasure 🤩

username yourusername HEY QUEEN

username even the met gala is an y/n fan

*themetgalaofficial liked this comment

liked by yourusername and 7,241,936 others

tagged: yourusername

lewishamilton The happiest 4 years with my Queen 🤍 Here’s to forever x

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yourusername the last picture was uncalled for 🥲

yourusername but i love you with everything that i have to give, my champion ❤️

lewishamilton I’m the luckiest man on earth to call you mine 😘

landonorris this is the sappiest shit i’ve ever read.

yourusername stay salty, lando 😚

danielricciardo landonorris it’s ok, mate, we know you’re doomed to be single for life. here if you ever want to talk x

yourusername danny 😭

landonorris ouch.

username SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP WHEN IS IT MY TURN

username they’re so in love it makes my heart hurt

username the third picture is proof Y/N WALKS HIM LIKE FUCKING ROSCOE 😭😭

username ok but WHENS THE PROPOSAL COMING???

username lewishamilton WHEN??

mercedesamgf1 Happy anniversary to our golden couple 🤩

yourusername thank you admin! 🤍 can’t wait to see you in singapore x

mercedesamgf1 We’re looking forward to it 🫶

username i still don’t like y/n but…this is kind of cute

username now that’s character development 👏

username glad you’ve finally realised !!

zendaya happy anniversary, my loves 😍

yourusername thank you sweetie 😘 come visit soon !

sebastianvettel Happy anniversary! 🤍

lewishamilton ❤️

username omg seb interacting on instagram? what is this parallel universe 🫨

username yourusername lewishamilton YOU GUYS LOOKING FOR A DOG BC I CAN BARK

username girl wtf 😭

username when they have kids they’re gonna be the ultimate milf and dilf 🤩

username STOP i need dilf lewis rn 😭

username MY FAVOURITE COUPLE I LOVE YOUUUU 💕

username it literally feels like yesterday that they first got together 😭

username i knowwww how has it been four years already?

username i want what they have 🥹🫶

liked by lewishamilton and 10,256,947 others

tagged: lewishamilton

yourusername king of my heart 👑

…

lewishamilton 🤍🤍

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