#which is so weird me? it's weirdo shit???
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I don't think I'll ever forgive either the art community on deviant or the tumblr rpc for making me feel like my characters, specifically my fem characters, were "mary-sues," or "overpowered" or boring. Especially as a black person.
#vic speaks his mind#outofmagic#deviantart and this hellsite has done irreversible damage to me#none of ya'lls fault obviously???#epsecially my fellow black mutuals#this site just hates women and fems? and black people?#which is so weird me? it's weirdo shit???
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The other day I saw something that actually made the fandom's complete lack of acknowledgement towards Megatron grooming/brainwashing Tarn make a lot of sense, which was essentially a comment that implied something along the lines of 'Tarn made himself worse.'
Which like, I guess makes sense as a justification? If you just write off Dying of the Light and Tarn's entire existence as him just "choosing" to be "worse" I guess it's easy to just blame Tarn and coddle Megatron as the victim of the whole thing.
As opposed to the actual truth of canon which is that Tarn was not always Tarn, Tarn used to be Damus, Damus was nothing like Tarn at all, and it was Megatron's direct, malicious, targeted intervention that took Damus (normal guy) and made him into Tarn (zealot freak). And that the DJD wasn't Tarn's creation, it was Megatron's creation, because Megatron not only wrote the DJD rulebook but also directly trained them (at least the initial members of the DJD, including Tarn) to be brutal, sadistic killers. And that Tarn's mental breakdown in Dying of the Light and subsequent deathhunt on Megatron was just Tarn continuing to fulfill the role Megatron assigned to him, which was to hunt down traitors to the Decepticon cause and make them pay in pain and death. In other words, that Tarn was literally carrying out the exact purpose that Megatron groomed him for, in service to the ideology that Megatron shaped to be centered entirely around ruthlessness, cruelty, and subjugation. And that everything Tarn did as an evil person was merely a logical extension of the ideology Megatron brainwashed him into carrying out, not him randomly deciding to "make himself worse" one day bc he was angy at his daddy.
But sure. I guess, from a certain, very zoomed in and granular perspective, Tarn is evil because he just chose to be that way and no one could've possibly predicted him turning on his master who reshaped his entire life to serve his will and then abandoned him. It's not like Megatron radicalized him for no reason and then built him to be a ticking time bomb or anything. No, Tarn just... decided to make himself worse. One day, for no reason at all. Mmmkay.
#squiggposting#tarnposting#like admittedly it was an offhand comment so i'm very much reading into it but it did make me go hmm#it was like. the casual disregard for the fact that tarn is the way he is for a specific reason/bc of a specific person#and it made me connect the dots to the fandom's/M stans' general lack of giving a shit about tarn and making fun of him for being a cult vi#victim* and i realized ooooooh that's why ppl find it so easy to blame and make fun of tarn and not megatron#it's bc they literally just blame tarn for everything and act like tarn IS TARN bc he just. chose to be#tarn having free will as an individual to make his own decisions doesnt negate who put him there#and like i guess i was just kind of stunned by the implication that tarn is just naturally evil/weird/gross in that particular conversation#bc tarn was an evil that was engineered in both a literal and figurative sense. by megatron personally#but now i understand why megatron stans find it so easy to just disregard that lakdsfljksdkls#it's literally just the 'well tarn couldve just chosen not to do all that shit' excuse#just ignoring the fact that yknow megatron crafted him to be a zealous vengeful asshole who hunts down any thoughtcrime and traitors#tarn didn't randomly go insane he didn't just become evil out of nowhere#the only way he 'snapped' was in nearly killing himself which was actually a mental health affliction (depression)#tarn was not insane. he was following exactly what megatron groomed and made and taught him to do which was hunt traitors#y'all are NOT gonna go out there talking about tarn like he's just some stupid little freak who just chose to be a violent weirdo
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🤭 having 🍼thoughts🍼 pls enjoy✨
// lactation , adult breast feeding , possible mpreg if you want to think there is ?? / omegaverse also possible??? or just because tbh, Ichigo being a boob man
thinking about Grimm’s milky tibbies 🫢💦 also thinking about Ichigo going feral over them, quite literally. starts as teasing and touching like he always does, until the tiniest drop has him suddenly ravenous.
it’s pretty much the first conscious thing Ichigo’s tasted that’s of hollow nature; the hollow blood in him is singing.
…the hollow that’s outwardly interacting with the world is growling possessively around his teat when Grimmjow asks what the fuck he’s doing.
Ichigo pawing at him as if Grimmjow’s both prey and mate after the first accidental taste, is not a feeling he’s ever considered, or believes he can enjoy for that matter.
but there’s no taking Ichigo away from his meal right now, is there? suckling away with dazed, inked, eyes that are almost glowing golden; sharper clawed hands half kneading, half pulling at Grimmjow’s whole ribcage.
Grimmjow would be pissed if only the feeling of him didn’t stir him so; if only the little pervert wasn’t absentmindedly humping away at his groin as he fed.
all he can really do is awkwardly pat Ichigo’s head with annoyance and the most uncomfortable arousal he’s ever felt;… and bark a warning growl of his own at the aggressive little shit his mate has turned into on top of him when he growls again under his touch.
he might just start scruffing the fuck out of Ichigo, he might allow this, for now— but the feral Vasto is on thin fucking ice.
#grimmjow jaegerjaquez#ichigo kurosaki#ichigrimm#nsft#一グリ#smut#weird smut#which is even better imo uwu#smut that makes you go 😳🥵 ‘wtf was that tho😀’#look I just like throwing this shit onto Grimmjow#and also Ichigo with a Mommy kink so far up his ass he doesn’t even realize he has it adsgdg#grimmichi#lactating kink#hollow ichigo#feral Ichigo#mild noncon#?? ig? 🤔#I just kept thinking of those weirdo ass cats that go on and nurse on their cat baby mammas as I wrote this afsgdgdgdg#fckn orange cat energy is what Ichigo has#it’s adorable to me ok 😂💕💕
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Not to be rude, but I just read your bio, and did you not draw Chasriel nsfw? I checked and it seems as though you've gotten it taken off of e621 in the last few months, which is good, but I'm a little curious if you're hypocritical now and just trying to hide it, or you've stopped drawing such things entirely.
WTFFF BRUHHH I HAVE NEVER MADE NSFW IN MY LIFE!!! BUT ALSO CHASRIEL IS FUCKING GROSS!!!!! EWWW THOSE ARE SIBLINGS AND ALSO KIDS,,,,, WITH WHO TF ARE YOU CONFUSING ME WITH TOO???HUHH??? AND WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS e621????
ALSO WHY ARE YOU CALLED LIKE THAT, IM NOT TURNING EVER ANON BACK ON IF IM GOING TO GET THINGS LIKE THIS LMAO
#like huhhhh#i think my art style is also like unique enough so im so confused on who are you even confusing me with#are you blind?#no way someone has a close enough art style to mine to get confused like thatttt#but also ewwwwwww ugh#this annoys me to hell bro#I HATE THE PEOPLE THAT DRAW THINGS LIKE THAT#ask#FUCK YOU ANON ALSO DO YOUR RESEARCH BEFORE CALLING ME THESE THINGS EW EW EW#edit:#okay anon said that they saw that drawing very quickly and instead focused on the name it was credited for#aparently it was credited to me for whatever reason and aparently is no longer up#which is good never credit me wrongly me in weird shit like that ew i hope the worst to whoever did that shit#i still think anon should have asked me personally instead of straight up assuming i would make something like that#anyways#i hope this does not happen again and also just as a reminder i would NEVER make weirdo shit i truly hate that stuff so much#oh and also i only post in the socials in my carrd i still have no fucking idea where anon saw that art that supposedly was credited to me
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just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.
no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this
#which is imo how a fandom space should be#i'm old fashioned and it breaks the fandom etiquette rules i stand by#i ship and stuff and absolutely NO cc needs to be subjected to that please and thank you even if it's a non-ship post#not saying hermits and others cant hang out and interact if they wish hell no but like....#if you as any person with a following willingly go into a fandom space you have to expect to see some things you find weird#doesn't even necessarily mean ship just stuff the cc finds weird :v idk im not phrasing this right but like#the rule with shipping around any sort of media has been to keep it away and not show the creators anything !!! and thats fallen out#of practice the past few years with ppl getting more and more comfortable demanding boundaries and personal info from creators#which isn't right imo bc its like you're trying to see how much you can get away with. u want a guide on how to interact and social skills#which is... huh??? just be polite and keep anything weird away from them like what we were doing#some folks nowadays need “permission” to ship stuff even from SHOWS and shit with no real people and its like wow... huh....#u need it to be canon?? u need everything told to u by the show?? wheres the imagination. the spirit.#the making of everything so far removed from what it once was#like that guy that played nick from heartstopper that had to be outed to play a gay guy. like#idk im so sick of the boundary fandom ppl in mcyt 'what if they saw and made it uncomfortable!! im going to show them!!!!'#you are making them MUCH more uncomfortable than i am by GOING INTO THEIR FACE AND DEMANDING THEY LOOK AT IT!!#AND DEMANDING BOUNDARIES N SHIT... CRAZY.... idk the hermits especially its weird to me bc clearly they understand fandom etiquette#and the dynamic im talking about. most of them understand that by going into fandom spaces they will see things they dont like#which is why a lot of them only like fanart and answer questions asked by fans. even on tumblr !!! where the weird ppl are!!!#they also all seem to understand they are playing characters (citing joel cleo and grian as examples) for their audiences#which is. smth the audience itself doesnt understand most of the time anymore. oh my god they all died in real life in hermitcraft season 8#idk hermitblr used to be a lot more okay with hermitshipping n then a bunch of ppl from other fandoms moved in and its all more negative#and makes me sad. idk...#i never meant for this blog to gain almost 500 followers i just wanted to make silly little ship posts and now im scared to#bc ive gotten hate and its.... bwugh.... tempted to remake blogs and make one thats very clearly just for me and a few weirdos#whatever i went off on a tangent in the tags as usual just pls dont show creators my posts even non-ship ones for this reason#jamies bad posts#talking in tags#serious posts#<- ig??? idk
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the moment people stop being comically against courtney is the day i stop making fun of them for being weird and wrong. stop being weird about a fictional character in ways that are hilariously stupid and ill stop calling you hilariously stupid
#people see my posts and vauge post about it saying UM WELL I DONT HATE COURTNEY SO WHY DID YOU SAY THAT#im not fucking talking about you oh my gOD IM SO TIRED OF SEEING IT. sorry i try to be normal but why have discussions around her regressed#like its gotten so much worse WHYYY OH MY GODDD. “omfg courtney fans always jump to courtney haters being misogynists”#no i jump to you being a fucking weirdo for caring so much which makes me raise my eyebrows#i literally enjoy other people having different opinions about characters i like and dislike bc everyone echoing me would be so boring#but people never like her for the valid reasons there are to dislike her and jump on her in crazy fucking ways. BEEE NORMALLL BE FUCKING N#ps talks#jesus fuck i try not to say shit like this over and over and over again because; again; i dont like seeing my own opinions everywhere#i dont want people to see my opinions and repeat it every 5 seconds even though i dont think i have that much influence#its just when i see people posting about my posts saying that im weird for defending a character so hard it drives me nuts bc#it feels like people lost the damn plot so hard. you have to reach so far to think i fucking care if people dislike courtney BECAUSE I DONT#IVE SAOID THIS 5 BILLION TIMES I ENJOY SEEING CHARACTERS IN DIFFERENT LIGHT. AS LONG AS YOUR OPINION ISNT FUCKING WEIRD#sorry im getting so annoyed i need to go to sleep i havent eaten anything in like 20 hours
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the funny thing about my relationship with my boyfriend is that, outwardly, people would never think he's a freak. they look at us and see the most regular, unassuming, jock-looking, handsome guy in the world dating this dyed-black-hair, beetlejuice-ass-character bitch that i present myself as and logically think "ah yes, she is clearly the domesticated gremlin of that particular situation"
they would, of course, be painfully wrong, because that man is as much of a weirdo as i am. his mind palace is much more strange and disarming than anything i could come up with, and i'm half convinced he just put on an extra 60 pounds of muscles to throw people off his freak-scent
last night for example, he calmly relayed to me that sometimes when we're making out a bit more intensely, he likes to think of how we're actually just one big digestive system, connected through our mouths, which he thought was a very romantic thought.
understandably, i had to prod his brain a little, so i asked "honey. honey. why are you regularly daydreaming about us being human-centipeded together" and he asked me what the plot of the human centipede was, because, again, he likes to pretend he is a regular person and doesn't watch a lot of horror movies. i tried to explain to him what the story of the movies was about, while largely trying to emphasize how it was a little unusual that our most passionate moments of intimacy would unpromptedly conjure in his mind the same thought process as that of a psychotic german doctor who wanted to kidnap people and sew their mouths to each other assholes
and then he, with the biggest, shiniest, bluest eyes in the world, frowned at me and said "well, but they weren't in love", firmly establishing that he thinks that the main problem of the acts committed throughout the human centipede trilogy were upsetting solely due to the lack of true love between the humans who were centipeded
so yeah i'm planning to father his children
#when you find a bigger weirdo than you you gotta keep them#he also doesn't think the shit he says even registers as weird which is just. the funniest part#he ALSO ALSO somehow only manages to say that shit in front of me#which leads me to believe that he either a) has that shit running through his subconscious 24/7 and only let's himself get comfortable#enough to say it when i'm around#or b) does actually know how fucked up he sounds and is in fact going for the long con of only showing that shit in front of me#so nobody will ever believe me when i tell them the insane situations this man comes up with#either way i cant not fuck him#human centipede#the human centipede#idk what to tag this lol i dont write posts
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good luck w the testing and a happy early new year!!
thank you it's already happened when this was sent but we all did get one free point for the listening section bc the audio fucked up and we didn't get to hear the part with the last question's answer. but I will now think this is luck borrowed from the future when this ask was sent
#bakuspeech#ask#I tweeted a storm inbetween the written competencies (morning) and the speaking test (afternoon) lmao#but its on my wretched personal acc so it's for me. it's just for me#I dressed. and this is not me being unkind to myself. like a mister bean character to that test. like I got a woolen suit jacket on#with the dress shoes of mismatched laces. AND Ive been bald recently#honest to gods can Not tell how well I did in the written tests. like I finished all of them with at least ten minutes to spare#but it's because they kept putting a giant timer on the projector screen and it scared me so bad. delf trauma#the content of the test itself I straight up. dont know if its any good#the thing with me. that u can probably tell by idk looking at me and hearing me talk and stuff. is that I speak english but I am#VERY bad at tests#which makes any formalized english testing for me extremely fucking funny#and like it's supposed to be in the same structure as an ielts set of questions and apparently that means#they kept asking me to confirm or deny that the author of the text agrees with the statements they got in the questions#and I was sitting there like okay you made me read about weird phrenology shit and then you ask me this?? like are we asking#textual or contextual or. how deep into the rhetorics are we talking here. cause two of these three authors are certified weirdos#(yes the reading segment had three texts. one was about physiognomy and how there was definitely a grain of truth in there#one was about tea - this is the inconspicuous one - and the last one was about the potentials of toxinology#with a general vibe of pseudomedicine zeal to its writing. it's probs from a family magazine or something)#so straight up yeah I can defend my quiz answers to a judge but that does Not mean it's gonna be the one on the answer sheet yknow#kinda the same with the writing segment. where like they gave me an extremely easy to expand on subject and then a piece of paper#the length of a receipt. and that just. I could NOT parse the expectation of that setup#like I saw that and was like. so do you want me to do it badly? or do it so excellently I deliver all I think in like 100 words or less?#cause I'm capable of one of those things and the distinction is important here#and like. yes I know it's a language aptitude test. they're looking to know if I speak english#and I Have done something like this before multiple times just with a different language. but that was. idk I have never had a ladder here#I know I speak the language. YOU can probably tell I speak the language. would this test's result reflect that? I don't know!#it's a baffling experience. I'm still thinking about it the day after. tldr it's really not about the english for me it's about the testing#it's so. it's reflected so clear in the listening test where I missed an entire question (other than the one they gave us for free) bc#my brain just noped out of my body for three seconds and when I yanked it back the tape's already moved on
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think i kind of hate m/cr now actually.
#once again this has nothing to do with my beloved mutuals who can do no wrong i love you xoxoxoxo#idk something in me has really soured over the last several months when it comes to them#its not really about the music at all or much of the band (tho some of that)#some of it i think might just be kind of a reminder of a lot of thibgs i dont want to think abt which isnt anyones fault#but MOSTLY. mostly its been fans and shit. obvs theres gonna be select weirdos in every bandom but like. got you fuckers are SO INSUFFERABLE#and theres SO MANY OF YOU good god learn how to shut the fuck UP#the way that they treat band members/other fans of both The Band and other musicians…. egregious#still not over that patrick nonsense that happened over the summer. god#its really just. every time i see smthg abt them or hear them i kind of feel weird in my gut and/or a visceral rage and im just. over it lol#ik its not really important or whatever like oh u dont like a band anymore. whatever. but like. idk im nust fustrated#esp bc they were one of my favorites for a really long time and some of their stuff was/is rlly importsnt to me. but it kinda feels like#someone poured a vat of acid into everything snd fucked everything up#.txt
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Tbh 90% of the weird mean spirited posts i see on here are authored by tphobes/cryptos i think people need to think a little harder on what most of these people actually mean rather than the surface level understanding of it
#For example lrb. ''People are only FAKE WEIRD'' most ppl think of the tiktokers that make autism/dissociation/etc a silly relatable thing#Rather than what op actually meant which was ''trans people are obviously just pretending to be like us Actual weirdos'' which would b funny#If it werent so abhorrently evil to even think#Like i dont blame ppl for just reblogging and moving on with life but the second i saw that post smth didnt sit right with me#99% of the time i trust my gut instinct with these kinds of posts and lo and behold im usually correct in that its cruelty to be cruel#IDK once again im not faulting anyone for interacting with that post at all but people need to recognize crypto shit when its there#Its so easy for someone to say something on surface level thats easy to agree with but the underlying meaning is much worse#emf
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#GIRL THIS IS TWO DAYS IN A ROW#WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING POKEMON GO AROUND 3-4AM AND KNOCKING MY FULLY HEALED 3K CP POKEMON OUT OF GYMS?#WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOUUUU#GET A FUCKING LIFEEEEEEEEEE 😭😭#like lowkey ty ig bc i have coins for remote raid pass if i need it (do dialga/palkia start today idk bc#half the “tips for into the wild”/pokemon go nov are like. palk/dial are 18 and onwards#but half r like. theyre only on their raid hour days. like huh which one is it)#ig ill see it today but graaghgh i really have to wake up earlier so i can go outside and play!!!!!#but also cold. and i dont wanna keep walking in and out of the mall like a weirdo. but i dont wanna sit in the same spot for hours either.#ive done both. both feel weird :/#but also! zamazenta is almost best buddies w me :D i got zacian and apparently i didnt use the buddy system well before bc.#zacian is my first best buddy... which is cute!!! i love shiny zacian! and zamazenta!!! my lovely shiny doggos :)#anyway i went off topic umm#excited to try gigantamax again w slightly better dmax pokemon... torn that i didnt get kanto starters OR gengy but its ok it is what it is#oh my god the first raid is at 6am and im awake to see what the pokemon is 💀 OKAY#IMA FUCKING IDIOT I LEVELED UP MY DMAX EXCADRIL BUT ITS GOT A FUCKING STEEL Q ATK? FUCK#I USED MY LAST Q ATK TM ON SOMETHING ELSE LITERALLY MINUTES BEFORE I SAW THIS FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK ME#44597#OH SHIT IT WAS TAPU KOKO BUT ALL OF THEM R SPAWNING WTF#GIRL im so tempted to remote raid a dialga RIGHT NOW. very bad decision but I WANT.... but if i go out tmr or today ill probs get it...#BUT I WANT IT RN 😭😭#caved and got myself a dialga remote raid but. ok ivs. not shiny. no legacy move.. 2.8k base w the weather tho ok damn#i do have a charged tm.. but i might run it back like w origin giratina and try to get a bunch...#difference is i dont have coins stacked rn and i just used em on remote but i do have 2 daily and 6 premium soooo...#hopefully one will have really good ivs and legacy move!!! shiny isnt that pretty but its bragging rights 🤷♀️#want the legacy move and candy tho 🤔
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sometimes i remember other people are Different From Me and i want to die. not in like a race or gender or whateve way but like someone just posted about not liking fantasy novels and now for some stupid reason im genuinely upset. because she isn't wrong. she is perfectly justified to have her opinion and shes not even shitting on fantasy novels its very explicitly just a personal taste thing and like. that makes it worse?? why does that make it worse. why am i having a meltdown about a person who i dont even know having a different opinion than me on something so trivial. if it was like a super thought out argument then even if i disagreed id be like oh interesting you think this way i think this way let me explore how you think for awhile but its just this gut level difference and it makes me feel so weird and alone and its a person i dont even know.
#please for the love of god if people know who im vagueposting abt do not inform her#i dont think any of my followers would do that thats a specific type of weird i dont tend to cultivate but idk#anyways this basically has nothing to do with her#its been really rainy and dark the past few days which has been seriously fucking with my sleep#and my banana this morning had a nauseatingly absurd bruise that made me throw the whole thing out so im underfed#so all my sadboy weirdo shit is coming out#original content#vent
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apparently there's a tag limit?
#okay so#im just flattering myself#thinking too much about it#and#i make all these scenarios in my head that i dont want#but theyre still there#hes nice?#like im genuinely glad he thought about me and realized he was being 'weird'#so he fought hard or some shit#so he wouldnt be one more weirdo ig?#BUT WHY#genuinely#i dont get it#you listen to me talk about how fucking stupid i am and that i cant say no that dont fight back and what do you do?#fuck#you dont do anything#you#change?#you decide to be a good fucking person?#why#i mean#you said youd kill me#like youd murder us#but now youre nice or something#now you wont harm me?#you could have#you came here and we were alone and you did nothing#which is good#but still infuriates me
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Ughhhhh ever since I woke up from my nap I've been in such a bad mooddddd
#my mom said some absolutely wack shit to me earlier#it's crazy bc I've been defending her to friends and such for months now being like#'oh she's actually not that bad'#turns out she's not that bad when I'm#preforming exactly how she wants me to#sighhh#turns out being scared and traumatized from ongoing medical trauma isn't acceptable for her#which is ok#whatever atleast she acted like a weirdo about it while I have a lot of support from friends and other such loved ones#and not like. days before surgery#or while I'm recovering from surgery etc etc#so now I have ample time to prepare for recovery without her bitch ass#she really sees any member of the family as someone to perpetuate her trauma it's wild#I have no beef with her in the slightest either#ive directed no malice to her or anyone im literally just suffering for my own reasons#the reasons being the fucked up matter of my health and trying to get care#it mainly just sucks bc I let my guard down enough to be like oh she's ok and I don't want to go no contact right when I'm able to#so she reminded me why I still want that lol#it's weird etc etc
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I wonder if my dad is fucking dead rn
#delete later#I feel indifferent yet curious#went down a rabbit hole#very complicated feelings about that man#last time we talked (messaged) each other was last june#I wonder if I'd cry... maybe#he was there in my life and childhood for the most part he did try and he did okay#but learning and finding things about him has really put a bitter taste in my mouth#I'll miss that weird guy from my childhood#not the guy in my teen/adulthood#my parents are just... both something else huh?#they tried and I feel ungrateful sometimes but others I'm just like “wtf is wrong with both of you respectively??”#but one is clearly a worser human being than the other for sure (so deceitful)#when we were still in contact I always thought “what if I brought *it* up? what would he say? would he lie? would he own up to it?”#god I hate that he was an okay and caring dad... makes me uneasy#sorry I don't usually give this much thought but when I do... man#BUT HEY! He might not actually be my father! which is a whole other can of worms#if not... that “dad” was never in my fucking life so why would I even give a shit to even do a dna test?#pretty sure my dad knew because he sent a dna testing kit to me a few months prior to that discovery#never gonna take it for that reason#I'm stuck with that piece of shit weirdo that was there for me (well not really stuck since he's faaaar away from me)#man... I got issues (so do both my parents *ba dum tss*)
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If your vision for the deradicalization of right-wing men begins and ends with "other men telling them that that's gross and to stop it" then I'm sorry, you do not understand how masculinity works.
"Men who hold patriarchal status" and "men who are feminists" are two groups who overlap less than you want them to. I'm sorry. That's not solely because men are so happy with patriarchal status that they don't want to risk it by policing misogyny/queerphobia/racism, It's because being misogynistic, queerphobic, and racist, end expressing other forms of toxic masculinity(and often abusively so) are part of how people establish and maintain patriarchal status. The men who have the ability to stop this via nothing but peer pressure are the very people who are doing it. That's by design. And engaging in feminist intervention is, in and of itself, usually the abrupt end of that status and its associated power to persuade misogynistic men.
Like, I have worked in blue collar jobs as a notably queer person. It was pretty much a constant deluge of verbal abuse. In my experience, most blue collar work environments are exploitative, abusive, and bigoted, and very gleefully so. On the occasions I have spoken up about someone saying something that was super fucking out of line (asking me which of the girls walking by was hottest. We were installing a portable classroom at a middle school), believe it or not, they completely failed to be shamed! Because nobody else on the crew gave a fuck. *I* was the weird one. They ghosted me. A full blown company ghosted me. I suddenly didn't have a job anymore because they just straightforwardly stopped telling me where the next job site was.
Like, this doesn't mean that it's your job to do it, but this vision you have of these big groups of men where everyone is on the fence and there is precisely one shit stirrer who can be shut down by a brave feminist man who can single handedly set the example for all these other guys...you are high. You are describing an "everybody clapped" level absurd scenario. Most of these truly virulent misogynistic guys either have zero friends, because, you know, our society is atomized to fuck, or they are in a group where the feminist guy is actually the weirdo who can be shut down and ostracized much, much easier than the misogynists, because there is no such thing as a man misogynists respect who stands up for women.
You might be saying "well, we're talking about longstanding personal relationships, actually. Like, they need to have to want to spend time with you and then, as a side effect, you can mind control them out of being a threat to us."
Problem with that being:
1: Many feminist men also have no friends, see the atomized society above.
2: Feminist men already stopped hanging out with men who make rape jokes because why the fuck would we want to spend time with them.
3: That isn't just because we respect women so hard. We are in many cases talking about men who are also deeply queerphobic, heirarchical, violent and abusive to other men. What initially drew me to feminism and women was a lack of heirarchical squabbling and constant bullying, and the ability to be openly queer. A lot of men who came to feminism did so because they knew that the patriarchy was not a place they would find success or acceptance. These are not the men who are gonna be able to change right wing minds.
4. Men do not view themselves as a monolith. There is no universal brotherhood of men. The actual meaning of the term "Fragile masculinity" is that men are constantly expected to prove that they are deserving of the status of being a member of their own gender. There are large swathes of men--including most of the men who you'd look to as examples of good, feminist men who you want to undertake this project--who are considered failed men, sissies, f****ts, soyboys, ect. They are. Not. Going. To. Convince. These. Men. Of. Jack. Shit. Much less successfully *shame* them. Jesus.
I know all of this sucks. I know it would be cool to be able to just point at a group and have them be responsible for the work. But nah. It's gonna have to be a societal project, one that will probably outlast all of us. Sorry. The thing you want these men to do is, absolutely, the morally correct thing to do. But presuming that it would be effective is, and once again I am so sorry about this, just ignorance of how these social groups function.
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