#which is sad !! i don’t mind friend groups at all

[coyotecrumb]

i just remembered that i had a tokyo ghoul au fic i was writing and it was kakuja!gojo x human!reader but there was a big focus on gojo's backstory and how he started cannibalizing other ghouls

basically reader winds up finding out about the ghouls at anteiku but you don't report them bc you have a vivid memory of being saved from a binge-eating ghoul by a second ghoul wearing a mask that looked like a white wolf. you never thanked them for getting you home safe that night so it's something that's always in the back of your mind.

the one thing that you find a little odd is that one of the residents of anteiku is a human child. megumi's sweet, if a little skittish, and you're curious about how he ended up being raised by a group of ghouls. that's where gojo comes in.

(way more material under the cut)

he tells you "oh yea i killed his dad and then i found megumi in his apartment so i just brought him here lol" and you're like ??!?!?!? but he explains more later once you've grown closer.

in the past, there was a ghoul named getou who was gojo's closest friend. getou was really passionate about humans and ghouls coexisting, but gojo never particularly cared about the topic. after an encounter with megumi's father, both of them were left traumatized and getou crashed out, started insisting that humans all needed to die, etc. the two of them fought.

“I had a best friend. But we fought.”  You count the stars in the sky, the few you can see; the rest blotted out by light pollution from the city’s lights. Gojo wants you to ask, so you ask. “What happened?”  He is silent for several moments. When you look over at him, he’s staring back, wearing that flat, impassive expression that he wears when the jokester’s mask falls. Except—you’re not so sure if it is impassiveness, anymore. There’s something else there, something you can only see now that you’ve known him for all these months. It might be something close to sadness.  Electric blue, his eyes burn brighter than anything in the night sky above you. His words come out calm, even, as if practiced and committed to memory.  “I killed him,” Gojo says. “And then I ate him.” 

so basically the two of them had a tacit understanding that the only way either of them would concede to die was through being devoured by the other. which is cute and fun. ummmmm and gojo's mask was modeled after a raven. and getou's was modeled after a white wolf !

here are some more snippets from the archives:

what would have been the opening scene.

There’s a strange sort of shroud that hangs around you, these days: a blurring of the senses, putting distance between you and yourself and the world, erasing the boundaries between flesh and earth until you don’t know where you end and dirt begins.  You are half-real. Mostly wanting. You spend your hours saying things to people that you can’t recall ten minutes later. It is not the worst way to live. And then—in some moments—you reenter your body all at once, the world crystallizing into furious, brilliant color. You become something real: another speck in the teeming anthill that is Tokyo, visible yet invisible to passersby. You can feel your own breath.  Your therapist gives you words for these things. Dissociation. Anxiety. When you experience a traumatic event, your mind and body can get stuck there even if you’re not in danger anymore.  Inertia. You walked out of that night—made it home—and with you came the memory of a silvery voice, clinging to your clothes, tinging your dreams.  You don’t fear it. The voice is something that pulls you towards it like it has you on the end of a string: coaxing, kind. But there’s no way to explain that to your doctors, who believe, like everyone else, that pure luck was what saved you from death’s jaws those few years ago.  Luck, you think now, taking the stench of blood into your lungs. It’s always luck. Gray skies stretch out overhead. The wind, on the cusp of autumn, carries the slightest chill. The alleyway behind your workplace might have been clean, once, but now it’s riddled with piles of trash that sully the air with their odor. You smell nothing but filth. Filth—and blood. The ghoul, hunched over and gasping, keels into a row of trash cans. An explosion of crashes hits your eardrums, loud enough to remind you that— Ah, right. You blink, your vision sharpening. This is real. More clatters. What little you can see of the ghoul's face is taut with stress, but undeniably young: the look of someone forced to grow up too fast. He can’t be any older than you. Blonde hair caked with gore falls across his forehead, nearly obscuring the black sclera of his eyes.  A young ghoul, kakugan activated in broad daylight, without any hint of a mask to hide his face. This, you realize, something twisting in your gut, is the look of prey, hunted. In his agony, he has not noticed you. Heart heavy like a sinking stone in your chest, you press against the brick wall behind you, nails digging into your palms. Blood continues to fall. Most of it comes from his shoulder, which— You bite back a gag. His arm is nearly entirely severed, dangling at an odd angle, bone and torn sinew visible where his wound meets rank air.  His kagune wraps around his other arm, spiraling into a shape reminiscent of a conch shell, colored an iridescent ocean blue. It glints in what little sunlight reaches it, keen like the blade of a dagger. Deadly; designed to kill. But it’s beautiful in a way that makes your heart ache, pain shooting through it like you’ve jarred an old wound.  You haven’t seen a kagune up close since— Yellow light, blotting out the stars. Asphalt against your palms.  A white mask. “You’re going to be alright. I promise.” 

shoko's the one to bring you to anteiku after you save nanami.

“Yaga,” Shoko says breezily, “I found them!”  The man glances up, then back down. Does a double take. “What—“  “I caught them up on Nanami and everything.” Shoko slips behind the counter, humming cheerily. “They're cool.”  He splutters. “What—you—Nanami? Shoko, when I tell you to look into someone, that doesn’t mean to tell them things and bring them here!”  “Ehh? But they helped Nanami, so I figured it was fine…” Shoko goes for a sip of his coffee—“Ach, Yaga-san, this has sooo much blood in it!”  If the man’s hair was long enough to grab, he’d be tearing it out in clumps. “You—I can’t even—You know what? No more investigating for you. And no smoking indoors!” 

megumi's introduction.

A faint rustle sounds from the hallway. You barely register it, eyes snagged on the way the snowy-white of Gojo’s hair glows under the overhead lights—but Gojo locks in on the noise like a hawk, head snapping in the direction of the door. His shoulders draw up, his eyes widening in something like anticipation—then he’s darting out into the hallway before you can even think to ask what’s wrong, disappearing silently into the dark.  At first, there’s nothing. Just some rustling; quiet footsteps. But then there’s a thud, Gojo’s triumphant cry, and a child—a child?—is squalling in a high, plaintive voice, “No!”  Gojo tromps back in with the glowing smile of a cat presenting its owner with a dead mouse as a gift. Attached to his outstretched arm is his hand, which wraps around a diminutive ankle; attached to which is a little boy, arms dangling to the floor in defeat, scowl dark enough to rival a thundercloud. [hypothetical material] As soon as his feet touch the floor, the little boy is off. His socked feet patter across the room with determined speed; within seconds, he’s out the door and gone.  Gojo brandishes a hand in the direction of the empty doorway, and says in a proud, indulgent voice, “Megumi!” 

more megumi and gojo's initial explanation.

Megumi, the third child residing at Anteiku (Gojo promises you with what you hope is a genuine expression that he is not hoarding any more children to shock you with) is different from what you’re used to from Nanako and Mimiko.  Like them, he is shy—but even around those he knows, there is no furtive giggling, no brightly-colored toys, no games of tag or pretend. Megumi is a reclusive shadow, spends most of his time observing the patrons of Anteiku in such isolated corners that you have no idea where he is half the time. When he emerges into the light, it’s with great reluctance, face preemptively sullen like he just knows he’s not going to like what’s about to happen.  He does not speak except to answer questions wherein Yaga gives him no choice but to do so: to select one of two choices for dinner without pointing, to reveal to you the name of the little stuffed wolf he keeps with him at all hours of the day. And, of course, to protest Gojo’s affections, which he showers upon Megumi with the grandeur of a philanthropist giving meals to the starving and which Megumi rejects with the fervor of a cat trying to avoid a bath.  He’s tense, skittish, wary of adults with the sort of reactive viciousness that reminds you of a spitting feral kitten.  And he is human.  “I killed his dad,” Gojo tells you gaily, slurping up blood through a straw. He ignores your wheeze as you choke on your cake and the look of abject disdain that Shoko turns on him from where she works behind the counter. “He deserved to die, total asshole, but his kid lived with him, and I couldn’t really leave him there, so, like—“ He shrugs. “I brought him here.”  You recover enough to squint at him. “You kidnapped a toddler?”  “You’re catastrophizing,” Gojo says.

some nanako and mimiko.

In the spring, Megumi is enrolled in a nearby primary school. Mimiko and Nanako are not. What follows is mutiny.  “How come Megumi gets to go and we don’t?” Nanako howls, stomping her foot. “I want to go to school, too!”  Mimiko, standing behind her sister with her doll hugged to her chest, does not yell but does something much worse: lower lip jutting out, she stares up with her enormous brown eyes, glinting with tears that threaten to spill over.  Yaga has taken his sunglasses off and is massaging his temples, wilting with exhaustion. Shoko and Gojo watch from behind the counter, visibly brimming with delight and offering absolutely no help.  “It’s not safe for you,” Yaga says for the nth time, pleading. “Megumi is human. He won’t be hurt there. But you two are ghouls, and you’re too young to have total control over your kagune or kakugan yet. I don’t have to tell you what happens if people discover you’re a ghoul, right? It’s too great of a risk.”   Nanako’s face is red with rage. “But that’s not fair!”  “I know, and I wish you two could go with him, I do. But this is about your safety.” 

maybe i'll write out a full version of this idea someday, but it's been set aside for now. i'm still very fond of the idea of ghoul babies nanako/mimiko and human baby megumi all running around together though

[idontmindifuforgetme]

I'm happy your asking because I had the same realisation and it hurt, still does actually. I've talked to friends about this before and I sometimes still long for this group of friends (I usually picture the characters from New Girl) that accepts each other with their quirks and bad choices but also criticises and calls each other out without their friendship being questioned.

so true anon :’) i have some amazing close friends who’d hear me out always, but beyond that i don’t think i’ve ever been in a friend group where the care was equal across the board. most of the time it’s just one person gluing everyone together (usually me lol) & yeah, some sweet connections form but it’s never this visceral ride or die thing. i feel like it’s this new gen z phenomenon to be isolated & to simply not have the energy for it

[bootsukki]

AITA for saying my 5-year anniversary is just another day, making my girlfriend mad?

aita series masterlist next part

wanings: angst, communication issues, swearing

The restaurant buzzed with the sound of clinking glasses and lighthearted conversation. Tsukishima sat at the end of the table, picking at his food, his usual expression set in a cool, indifferent mask. Across from him, his girlfriend, (Y/N), was laughing at something Yamaguchi had said. The group of friends had gathered for dinner, as they often did, the easy camaraderie between them keeping the atmosphere light. Yachi and (Y/N) were sat side by side, murmuring about something as they picked out pieces of their food.

“Hey, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi started, cutting into the relaxed mood. “You guys have been together for four years now, right? Any big plans for your five-year anniversary coming up?”

The question made (Y/N)’s heart flutter. They hadn’t talked much about their anniversary yet, but after being together for so long, she had imagined something special was in the works.  (Y/N) had been feeling kind of sad the past days, not seeing Tsukishima enough due to reasons he hadn’t explained to her but she still had the hope of it just being a busy time at the museum. Tsukishima had been training a new coworker, Mia, and although she didn’t like her that much, she kind of understood that there were a lot of protocols at the museum that had to be followed. 

She turned to look at Tsukishima expectantly, a small smile tugging at her lips.

Tsukishima, though, didn’t meet her gaze. Instead, he took a sip of water, leaned back in his chair, and shrugged. “It’s just another day,” he said flatly.

The smile vanished from (Y/N)’s face instantly. The words hit her harder than she had expected, like a punch to the gut. Her chest tightened, a thousand thoughts racing through her mind, none of them good. After everything they had been through, everything they had shared, was their five-year anniversary really just another day to him?

She glanced around the table, everyone else had fallen silent, awkwardness creeping in. Yamaguchi shifted uncomfortably, clearly not expecting that kind of response. The rest of their friends exchanged uneasy glances, unsure whether to laugh it off or change the subject.

Tsukishima wasn’t big on surprises and they always made plans for dinner but he hadn’t said a thing yet. (Y/N) had the silly dream of him proposing and she even told Yachi about it. Not only Yachi, but him as well which he answered with a smile.

(Y/N) swallowed hard, forcing a smile, though it didn’t reach her eyes. “Just another day, huh?” she muttered under her breath, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice.

Tsukishima’s brow furrowed slightly as he looked at her, his eyes narrowing just a fraction. “What?” he asked, his voice sharper than usual.

(Y/N) clenched her fists under the table, anger starting to simmer in her chest. “You really don’t care, do you?” she said quietly, but there was an edge to her words that caught everyone’s attention.

“Care about what?” he asked, sounding genuinely confused but annoyed at the same time.

“Our anniversary! Us!” (Y/N) stood up abruptly, her chair scraping loudly against the floor. “Lately, it’s like you don’t even care anymore! You’ve been staying out late, barely texting me, and now this? ‘Just another day’? What the fuck, Kei?”

All of their friends stopped their conversations as they saw (Y/N) standing up.

Tsukishima’s expression hardened, his jaw tightening. “You’re being dramatic. I’ve just been busy.”

“Busy?” she repeated, her voice rising. “You’ve barely been home! You don’t talk to me, you don’t ask how I’m doing, and now you say our anniversary is just another day? What am I supposed to think?”

(Y/N) could feel everyone’s eyes on them, but she didn’t care. This had been building up for weeks, and now it was like a dam had broken. Her heart was pounding in her chest, her emotions swirling between anger and hurt.

Tsukishima sighed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I don’t see why you’re making such a big deal out of this.”

“You don’t see why I’m making a big deal?” (Y/N) couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Tears of frustration were welling up in her eyes, but she blinked them back, not wanting to cry in front of everyone, completely embarrassed about the situation. “You don’t get it, do you? You’ve been so distant, and I don’t know what’s going on with you anymore.”

Tsukishima’s eyes flickered, but his face remained stoic. “You’re overthinking it.”

(Y/N) felt like she had been slapped. His words felt dismissive, like he didn’t care at all about her feelings, like her fears and concerns meant nothing. She grabbed her bag from the back of her chair, her hands trembling with anger and hurt as some tears finally made their way out, coating her cheeks.

“I’m done,” she said, her voice shaking. “Sorry guys.��

“(Y/N)? Where are you going?” Yachi asked her, worried as she looked at their friends, clearly not knowing what to do.

“I don’t know.”

With that, she turned and stormed out of the restaurant, leaving their friends sitting in stunned silence.

Yachi grabbed her bag and coat, sending Tsukishima a glare, saying something under her breath and following (Y/N).

After (Y/N) stormed out of the restaurant, Tsukishima sat there, his hands clenched tightly in his lap, the tension rolling off him in waves. He felt the eyes of his friends on him, but he didn’t dare look up. The heaviness in his chest, the kind he could usually ignore, was now impossible to shake. (Y/N) was not wrong about it, he had been spending nights at the museum, working overtime and taking paperwork home. He woke up during the night to go into his office at home and keep working, completely stressed. 

If she only knew…

Yamaguchi shifted uncomfortably beside him, glancing toward the door where (Y/N) had disappeared. “Tsukki…” he began softly, but Tsukishima cut him off with a sigh.

“I know,” Tsukishima muttered, rubbing his temple. He could already feel the irritation bubbling beneath his skin. It wasn’t like he didn’t care about (Y/N), but how was he supposed to handle all of this at once? Work had been relentless, and every spare moment he had, he was trying to plan their future. He’d never been great at expressing himself—something (Y/N) knew better than anyone—but it seemed like this time, he had really messed up.

The table had fallen into an awkward silence, none of the others quite knowing how to break the tension. Tsukishima didn’t stick around for long after that. He tossed some cash on the table, muttered a stiff goodbye, and headed home.

As he arrived home, he texted her, messages left on delivered. He hated going to sleep without fixing their problems.

Running a hand through his hair, he called her. He didn’t know what he was going to say to her. How was he suppose to tell her everything without spoiling everything he has worked and planned for? Would she even pick up?

"What?"

There was a brief silence on the other end, just the faint sound of Tsukishima breathing before he finally spoke.

"Where are you?" His voice was steady, calm—too calm.

"I’m at Yachi’s." Her words came out clipped, tension already thick between them. "I needed space."

There was another silence, and (Y/N) could practically feel the weight of it pressing down on her. She had expected him to ask more questions, maybe show some concern. But instead, he was quiet.

“You didn’t say anything,” Tsukishima finally said, his tone flat. “You just left.”

(Y/N)’s jaw clenched. She could already feel the frustration rising, boiling just beneath the surface. "You didn’t give me much reason to stay. You didn’t even try to stop me.” she shot back, her voice colder than she wanted it to be.

His sigh was audible over the phone, a soft exhale of frustration. "You’re overreacting."

The words hit her like a punch to the gut. Overreacting? Was that really what he thought? After everything they had been through the past year with moving and the stress of his new job and deadlines of her book, all the nights he came home late or didn’t come home at all, brushing off their anniversary like it meant nothing—she was overreacting?

"I’m overreacting?" she repeated, her voice rising. "Kei, you’ve been disappearing for days, barely talking to me, acting like I don’t even exist half the time. Do you know how that feels? Do you even care?"

"Of course I care about you," Tsukishima snapped, his calm demeanor slipping for the first time. "But you’re making a big deal out of nothing."

(Y/N) let out a bitter laugh, the sound harsh in the quiet room. "Nothing? So me feeling like I’m losing you is nothing? Our anniversary is nothing? Us is nothing to you, is that what you’re saying?"

Tsukishima didn’t respond immediately, and the silence that followed only made her anger flare hotter.

"I didn’t mean it like that," he muttered, but his voice lacked any real conviction. It sounded more like he was trying to calm her down, to brush aside her feelings.

"Then what did you mean, Kei? Because right now, it feels like you don’t care. It feels like you’ve already checked out of this relationship." (Y/N) stood, pacing across Yachi’s small living room, her heart pounding in her chest. She knew Yachi was probably listening to their conversation but she couldn’t care less about it. She sniffed. “You act like I’m supposed to just accept this. Like it’s normal for you to disappear and not talk to me. Like I’m supposed to just be fine with it. We've been together for almost 5 years, we should know by now how to communicate with each other."

"You’re not giving me a chance to explain," Tsukishima said, his voice dropping, more annoyed now.

"Then explain!" she shouted, her voice cracking with emotion. "Explain to me why you’re never home! Explain why you can’t even be bothered to talk to me when you are! Explain why our anniversary is just ‘another day’ to you, when it’s supposed to mean something! Explain why it feels like I don’t matter to you anymore!"

There was a long, suffocating silence.

"You don’t get it," Tsukishima said finally, his voice low and cold. "You don’t understand what’s going on, why I…”

"Because you won’t tell me!" (Y/N) felt the words rip from her throat, raw and desperate. "You won’t let me in, Kei! You won’t let me help, and then you act like I’m the one being unreasonable? I’ve tried. I've tried to gvet you to tell me what is going on, why you come home that late... I’ve tried to be patient, but I can’t do this alone."

"I never asked you to do anything alone," Tsukishima muttered, but his tone was distant, like he was speaking just to end the conversation.

"That’s the problem!" (Y/N) yelled, her frustration bubbling over. "You don’t ask. You don’t say anything. You just keep everything to yourself and expect me to be fine with it. But I’m not fine, Kei. I’m not fine with you shutting me out. We are a couple, we should be there for each other, in good and bad situations but you... You don't care about it."

Tsukishima sighed again, and this time it was heavier, like he was already tired of the conversation. "I don’t have time for this right now."

(Y/N) froze. The words cut deep, the final nail in the coffin. 

"You don’t have time for this?" she whispered, her voice trembling. "You don’t have time for us?"

"That’s not what I meant," he said quickly, but the damage was done.

"No," (Y/N) said, her voice steadier now, but full of cold, quiet anger. "I think that’s exactly what you meant. You don’t have time for this. For me. For us. I guess you have all the time in the world for Mia."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Don’t twist my words," Tsukishima said, irritation clear in his tone now.

"I’m not twisting anything. You’re the one who’s been distant, who’s been shutting me out. You’re the one who doesn’t have time for me, and I’m done pretending like that’s okay. You're the one always doing things at work, spending an absurd amount of time at the museum, spending nights at the office, door closed as if..." She bit her lip, her throat tightening with unshed tears, not daring to say what she was thinking about. About him possibly cheating with the perfect Mia, who had the same interests at him. Mia, who threw herself at him just to get his attention. Mia, who was perfect and could talk about everything Tsukishima loved... She wanted to throw up just by thinking about it. "I can’t keep waiting around for you to decide whether or not you want me in your life, Kei."

Another long silence.

(Y/N) felt her heart drop. She had wanted him to fight for them, to say something—anything—that would reassure her that this was just a rough patch, that they could work through it. But instead, all he gave her was more distance by saying nothing to her.

"Tsukishima, are you going to say something?”

For a moment, she thought he might say something more, but the line stayed silent. The weight of their words hung in the air, unspoken truths pulling them further apart.

"That's my answer then. I’ll come get my things tomorrow," (Y/N) said quietly, trying to keep her voice steady, though her heart was breaking. 

"What? (Y/N), don’t say things like that. Don’t even think about it." Tsukishima muttered, his voice cold and distant again.

“How can I not?” She was now sobbing, Tsukishima’s heart breaking at the sound of her hurting. “You are not willing to even tell me that you want me in your life.”

And just like that, the call ended, the silence on the other end of the line as heavy as the emptiness that now filled the space between them.

*****

“It’s 2 in the morning.”

“I know.”

“You know that I have a kid sleeping upstairs, right?”

“Yes.”

Akiteru tsukishima looked at his younger brother, making way for him to enter his house. Without notice, the younger sibling had made his way towards his brother’s house, not knowing what to do. Akiteru had already noticed the tension radiating from his younger brother and made him some tea.

“You look like hell,” Akiteru remarked, setting the cups on top of the coffee table.

Tsukishima shot him a glare, but it lacked its usual sharpness. “Thanks,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair.

Akiteru leaned back in his chair, folding his arms over his chest. “Wanna tell me what’s going on?”

Tsukishima didn’t respond right away, staring at the grain of the wooden table as though it held the answer to all of his problems. After a long moment, he finally spoke. “I messed up with (Y/N).”

Akiteru raised an eyebrow. “What kind of ‘messed up’ are we talking here?”

“The kind where she walked out and told me she would get her things from the apartment,” Tsukishima admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. He hated saying it out loud, but he couldn’t deny it any longer.

Akiteru’s expression softened, his usual teasing tone nowhere to be found. “What happened?”

Tsukishima explained everything—about the dinner, his cold response to the anniversary question, (Y/N) accusing him of not caring, and how he had been spending nights working late. 

When he finished, Akiteru let out a low whistle. “Sounds like you’ve been under a lot of pressure,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “But… Kei, you can’t just shut her out like that.”

“I didn’t mean to,” Tsukishima snapped, frustration leaking into his tone. He regretted it immediately, but Akiteru didn’t flinch.

“I know,” Akiteru said calmly. “But what did you think was going to happen? You don’t talk to her, you’re distant, and then you dismiss your anniversary in front of all your friends? Of course she’s going to feel like you don’t care.”

“Akiteru, I…” Tsukishima sighed. “I’ve been working late to get a few days off of work, so I can take her on a trip and propose.”

Tsukishima’s shoulders sagged. He had been so wrapped up in trying to plan the perfect proposal, trying to juggle work and life, that he hadn’t considered how it all felt to her.

“I’ve never been good at this stuff,” Tsukishima admitted quietly, his voice raw in a way that it rarely was. “I thought I could just… handle it.”

Akiteru smiled softly, “Propose? Are you serious?” The younger man nodded, placing his forehead on the table.

“I fucked up.”

“Kei, relationships aren’t something you just ‘handle.’ They’re messy, they take work, and sometimes you have to talk about the hard stuff, even if it sucks. But if anyone’s worth the effort, it’s (Y/N), right?”

Tsukishima’s heart clenched at that. (Y/N) was worth it. She was worth all of it—the frustration, the awkward conversations, the vulnerability. He had never cared about anyone the way he cared about her, and the thought of losing her because he had been too proud or too stubborn to open up made him feel sick.

“You need to talk to her,” Akiteru said firmly. “Skip the proposal part. Tell her everything. Tell her about the trip. I promise you everything will be alright.”

Tsukishima nodded, closing his eyes for a moment, sleep catching up to him.

*****

AITA for saying my 5-year anniversary is just another day, making my girlfriend mad?

Hey, Reddit. I (M23) have been dating my girlfriend (F23) for almost 5 years. Our anniversary is coming up soon, and it’s kind of a big deal since it’s our 5-year mark. I have been working overtime to get money and time for an surprise anniversary trip for us and I haven't been home that much and when I came home, I kept working during the night. My best friend (M23) and some others friends, including my girlfriend, were out for dinner, when he asked me about my anniversary plans. Without thinking too much, I shrugged and said, “It’s just another day.”

My girlfriend started to freak out to the point of leaving the restaurant and the apartment.

AITA?

User 1:

YTA!!!!!!! OF FUCKING COURSE she would freak out about something like that! Anniversaries are important and more so when they are about milestones such as this one. You need to fix this ASAP.

User 2:

Dude, I can't defend you on this one, YTA. That was a shit show. You could have told her that you weren't in the mood to celebrate or something but instead you said it in the worst way possible and in front of other people. That would probably broke her heart.

User 3:

YTA. you could have told her you had a surprise planned or something.

User 4:

Bro...

author's notes: this will have a 2nd part, out in a few days! :)

[swordsandholly]

Little Death

Incubus!Soap x fem fat reader | Ao3

NSFW | MDNI | cw: dubcon, noncon, drinking, biting, afab reader, blood, PiV sex, cunnilingus, anal, monsterfucking, size difference, kidnapping, dead dove

Word Count: 4.5k

You sit in your apartment on your worn out couch, sipping a glass of shitty gas station wine at some godforsaken hour in the morning. Just like you do nearly every night these days. Love Island plays loudly on the TV while you try to drown out the overbearing silence that seems to cling to you. It surrounds you at all times, everything just a little too quiet. A little too distant.

You knew getting divorced would be lonely. You didn’t expect it to be this bad.

Your eye connects with a piece of paper that’s been living on your side-of-the-road coffee table for the past… who knows at this point. The friend that gave it to you meant well. She intended it to be a funny, light hearted gesture. Instead, you just feel pathetic. The pitiable fat girl that can’t get a date. Not that she’d be wrong. Out of drunk boredom, or maybe sheer desperation, you grab the stupid cut out article. It’s some plasticky, cheap print with the title ‘How To Summon A Lover’ which is probably the laziest headline in the world for a supposed spell.

Are you lonely? The summary asks, Do you need some special company? Just follow these steps and get exactly what you’re looking for!

It’s stupid. It’s corny. Luckily - or unfortunately - you are just drunk enough to take part in stupid and corny. Your eyes graze over the materials list - paper, a red marker, a metal baking sheet, and a stick candle. Your brow scrunches. You suppose you can sacrifice one of your outdated, unused decor candles that sit on your mantle. You gather the supplies with clumsy, uneven steps.

Fuck your ex. Fuck him for making you this sad and pathetic. Fuck him for piling on the insecurity, for isolating you and taking nearly all your friend group. For all of it. You plop down on your rug, items in hand and thoughts swirling angrily.

Step 1: Place the paper on the baking sheet

Step 2: Draw a pentagram

You roll your eyes. Of fucking course it’s a pentagram. You do it, still.

Step 3: Write “I Light The Flame of Desire” on each side of the page

Step 4: Place the candle in the center of the paper

Step 5: Light the candle and concentrate on your intention until it burns out.

You regret picking up such a big candle.

When you wake your mouth is dry and your back aches. The sunlight offends your eyes when you attempt to crack them open. You must have fallen asleep on the floor at some point. You look down at the mess in front of you. The candle burnt the paper into almost nothing at some point. Thank god the article told you to put it on a baking sheet.

You feel so fucking stupid.

You stumble into the shower, allowing the hot water to help rouse you from your hungover, groggy state. That feeling of stupidity tickles the back of your mind. It’s not like you expected it to work - really, what’s making your heart twist and shame crawl up your back is the disappointment, is that it didn’t. At least you don’t have to work today. You don’t particularly feel like being around people. Not that you do the rest of the time.

As you turn to get out, fear strikes through you at a shadow in your periphery through the fogged shower glass. Just as soon as you see it, it disappears. You shrug it off, heart still thumping wildly as you towel off. Something in your gut churns as you do your best to get ready for the day. An unease that won’t leave as you make yourself at least appear like someone with their life together. A feeling that someone is watching makes your hair stand on end.

You send up a thank you to the universe that you managed to get up early enough to make it to the grocery store during quiet hours. While buckling your seatbelt, that shadow comes back. Right behind you, in the back seat. It’s gone as soon as you check the rearview mirror. You let out a shaky breath. It keeps happening. While you get your shopping cart, while you choose produce. Every time you turn an isle, it’s there. It sends shivers down your spine. Some black, effervescent shape that follows you worse than a shadow. That catches your eye even when you consciously try to ignore it. You really need to lay off the drinking.

As soon as you get home, you toss everything from the night before - including the baking sheet. Some superstitious part of you rears its head, telling you to walk the damn thing all the way to the outside dumpster rather than leave it to fester in your personal trash. You don’t believe in ghosts or spirits. You’re sure you just drank too much, that you slept strangely and it fucked with your head. That not speaking to anyone besides brief interactions with coworkers and customers for weeks on end has left you jumpy and off. Maybe you really should see that therapist your lawyer talked about. She’s expensive though, and not covered by your insurance…

You turn over another bottle of wine in your hand, wrinkling your nose. Not tonight. Not when you turn to put the bottle down and nearly jump into the ceiling at some shape moving to the living room from behind you. Only in your periphery, only vague images, leaving you uneasy. You toss and turn when you finally get into bed. It still feels like you’re being watched. Like there’s a camera just over your shoulder, or in the ceiling fan, staring down at you. For the first time since you were small, you bury yourself under the covers and screw your eyes shut, hoping it will save you from the monsters under your bed and in your head.

You stir at a weight dipping your bed. It’s slight, so slight you almost miss it entirely, until it isn’t. Until whatever it is moves again and you feel something brush over your legs. In a panic, still half asleep, you turn onto your back, fists flying through the air only to be caught by inhumanly large hands. You flail, kicking as a scream catches in your throat.

“Shh, sh, yer a’right.” A distinctly Scottish brogue coos, pinning you to the bed without so much as a grunt. You finally manage to open your eyes properly. He’s big - eyes a bright, unnatural blue with a wild light in them. When he grins at you it exposes long fangs where his normal canines should be. Two horns poke out from his head, the shorn sides of his haircut further exposing them. There’s an unnatural red tint to his skin, darkening to nearly pure crimson at the ends of his exposed limbs. A shiver runs down your spine.

“Wh- who the fuck are you?” You squeak, far less threatening than you might have liked.

The beast’s grin only widens. “Donnae ye know? Ye called me, after all.”

Your eyes widen to saucers as you stare up at him. Did- there’s no way that stupid spell worked! It was a cut out from a damn off-brand Cosmopolitan. It was stupid sleepover bullshit. It was - It’s wasn’t- You couldn’t have summoned a real, actual factual demon into your apartment. No, this has to be a prank or intruder or - or hallucination even.

You try to shove at his chest as soon as he retracts his hands, a weak attempt at escaping. Part of you expects to phase through him - to wake up in your quiet, dark bedroom. Except his hands are very much real and warm as they pin your wrists back against the mattress. The silhouette of massive wings block out the little bit of moonlight that might have otherwise drifted through the slit in your curtains. You can barely make him out, now. Those too-bright eyes glint like a cat’s as he stares down at you.

“Now, why did ye call me, little one?” He leans in, nose brushing against yours before ducking his head down to lick a long stripe up your neck.

Your face heats, mouth struggling to form words. “I… didn’t think it was real…”

“Tha’s not a reason.” Too-sharp teeth nip at the shell of your ear.

“I just… why do you want to know anyway?” You spit defensively, thrashing under him in a sudden burst of confidence - or desperation. You’re not sure. It does fuck-all for you, the beast pinning your thighs under his weight. A deep, warning growl rumbles in his chest. You freeze at the sound - some ancient instinct telling you to stop all action and pray it saves you.

“It’s no’ polite t’dodge my question, bonnie.”

You whimper involuntarily, his sharp teeth grazing the soft skin of your neck with just enough pressure to threaten a bite. The words tumble from your lips near incoherently, “I haven’t- I’ve only been with one person… for a long time. I’m nervous… about a second…”

He hums. Something brushes your shin - a tail, you think. You can’t make it out in the dark. “Whit’s yer name, doll?”

You blurt it, a little horrified at giving that information to some supernatural creature. For some reason you find yourself following it up with, “What’s yours?”

He laughs and mulls it over, jaw clenching briefly, as if he can’t make up his mind about what it is. “Call me Soap, aye?”

You snort despite yourself and he - Soap - quirks a brow. “Weird name for a demon.”

“Incubus.” He corrects.

You have half a mind to complain when he tears your nightgown off before you can react. The cloth rips fast, practically disintegrating in his rough hands. That’s until he climbs down the bed, taking one nipple between his lips and flicking the other. Your back arches, hands fisting the sheets. You let out an indignant ow when he bites down on the fat of your breast, leaving a mark just shy of drawing blood. Soap ignores it, continuing to lavish them with attention as he sees fit. Your thighs press together and you can’t help but squirm, becoming desperate for more in spite of the voice in your head telling you to run. He senses it, you think, moving down your body leaving nips and bites in his path before settling between your thighs. He takes your underwear off in much the same fashion, turning them to shreds in barely a moment. His wings disappear into the shadows - there but not simultaneously. Shifting in and out of your vison.

“Look a’ tha’.” He sighs. “Whit a pretty pussy. Cannae believe yer lettin’ her go unused.”

You whimper and attempt to close your legs, failing when those massive hands hook under your knees and push them up to your chest as far as they can go. His nails - near claws - dig into the flesh of your thighs. A gasp tumbles from your lips as his tongue drags through your folds. Soap places a light kiss your your clit before following with a harsh suck that leaves you twitching and whining. Part of you feels ashamed for enjoying this as much as you are - for lapping up the attention from this stranger like a starved dog - but it feels too unreal for you to really care. Too fictional to apply your real world morals or sensibilities.

You yelp in surprise when his tongue flicks over your back hole, causing him to chuckle and mutter, “Tha’s for later.”

He doesn’t leave you time to think on that promise. You throw your head back as he slips his tongue inside. Fuck, it’s deep. Unnaturally long - built to systematically pull pleasure from you just like the rest of him. You find yourself grinding down onto it despite yourself, pent up body giving into instinct and abandoning rational thought. You grab onto his stupid hair to further press him into you. He doesn’t seem to mind as a low guttural sound rumbles through his chest.

A thick finger circles your entrance, replacing his tongue in one swift motion. He doesn’t wait to add a second - the stretch causing you to hiss. His fingers are big. His proportions just on this side of incompatibly large. You wonder briefly, distantly, why his claw-nails aren’t hurting you. It’s hard to care much when the pad of a thick finger presses roughly against that spot that leaves you gasping. His lips wrap around your clit again, sloppily sucking and licking at the little bud as you careen closer and closer to the edge. Your back arches harshly, almost painfully, as you tumble over with a choked moan.

“So easy.” He chuckles. Your face gets hotter, an indignant pout forming on your lips. Rude. Your eyes drift over his body and, somehow for the first time tonight, you realize he’s already naked. Not a single piece of cloth in sight upon his arrival. You let yourself take in his strong torso, the thick dusting of hair from his chest all the way down to a healthy happy trail, down to-

“That’s not gonna fit!” You squeak, clumsily trying to back away. His cock hangs heavily between his legs; thick and veiny and already leaking. His hand on your sternum stops you in place. You’re sure he can feel the way your heart hammers away in your chest - practically beating against your ribcage. For a moment, you think you see sympathy in his eyes. Rather quickly you realize that warmth is, instead, hunger. An eagerness to swallow you whole dances across his sharp grin.

“We’ll make it fit.”

That’s all the warning you get before he’s bullying his cock inside you, inch by inch despite your shaky pleas to slow down. It burns, just crossing over the threshold into too much. Your teeth grind, a deep whine resonating in your throat. Your fingers claw at the sheets below you and your body jerks with odd shocks of pleasure and pain all tied up into one.

“Fuckin’ tight…” Soap groans.

“S’too much!” You practically sob, hips squirming to get away from the intrusion.

“Y’can take it.” His other hand grabs onto your waist to still you. You can’t stop the moan that forces its way past your lips as his hips meet yours.

You expect it to hurt when he fucks you - he doesn’t allow you time to adjust, each thrust practically punching the air from your lungs. Instead, it sends electricity up your spine. Your brows knit together, eyes screwed shut as warmth pools at the base of your spine. Soap hooks one of your legs around his hip, the other over his shoulder. You watch him through bleary eyes, the strange red of his hands contrasting with your natural, human skin. The way his hand nearly wraps around your thick calf. The way his core flexed with every thrust. The pleasured knot in his brow.

Soap lets your raised leg drop, pressing his weight down onto you and bracketing your head with his forearms. He smells so good - spices and trees. It invades your senses, leaving your mind somehow foggier than it already felt. He pulls you into a kiss. It’s not romantic, not emotional, just a searing exchange made up of messy teeth and tongue. He tastes like cinnamon. His fang catches your lip and copper coats your mouth. A light whine escapes him as he licks it up and sucks at the small wound.

“Please, please, please.” You pant rhythmically, chest heaving.

“Please, please, please.” He mocks, chuckling at your begging as he presses his thumb to your clit.

You practically seize, already overdone and so close to another. You’re babbling, you know that much, but the contents of your words are lost on you.

“Gonnae cum f’me?” Soap presses his nose to your temple. “Gonnae cum on this cock?”

You nod vigorously, nails leaving half-moons his strong shoulders. His thumb swirls your clit as he continues to spill filthy words into your ear. Things you’ve never thought of, otherworldly promises no man could keep, and groaned nonsense to match your own. Your climax slams into you. You practically howl, whole body shaking. Soap’s tongue drags up the side of your face, licking up sweat and tears. He’s not far behind, a growl rumbling through his chest; his hips stutter as he spills inside you.

You think, for a moment, as you desperately try to catch your breath, that it’s over. He’ll disappear off into the ether and you’ll wake up tomorrow from this strange dream. All of it a lonely, mentally unwell delusion that you can tell your therapist. After you book her. You really should if your brain is coming up with shit like this.

Except, he doesn’t stop. The slowed rocking of his hips immediately picks up again. He leans up, hands gripping your waist as you let out a long, keening whine. You try to shove at his hands, to kick your shaking legs. They’re clumsy. Weak and used and uncoordinated. The sweat on your palms leaves you slipping, unable to get a grip around his wrist. Soap just laughs - dark and unnatural. Far too entertained by your panic. A malicious spark lights his eyes as he stares down at you.

“S-soap!” You gasp, mind and body going into overdrive. “P-please! You don’t have to - you can - fuck - just stop!”

He laughs again, only speeding up - using the hold on your soft waist to fuck you back onto him. An anger flares up in you and you reel back, slapping your open palm against his face as hard as you can manage. It doesn’t do anything to deter him, his hips still slam full force into yours without so much as a stutter. His chuckle cuts off into a gravelly groan. “Do tha’ again.”

As much as you don’t want to give in to him, you do. You batter your fists against his chest, his arms, anywhere you can even slightly reach. You dig your nails into his hands. He just speeds up, lewd, wet sounds an loud slaps echoing in the room along with your moans and shouts. Soap pulls out just long enough for his arm to encircle your waist and flip you over as if you weigh nothing to him. You hardly get your bearings before he’s forcing his cock back in your cunt. His hands latch onto your hips so tightly you’re sure they’ll bruise, if not be crushed completely.

“Please! Fuck - Soap - please - st-” You choke out, barely able to lift your face out of the sheets to breathe. Your whole body tremors violently. You try to reach behind yourself for him - to get some purchase, but all you’re met with his a hand firmly planted between your shoulder blades to hold you in place.

“Whit? Ye think tha’ was all? Jus’ one round an’ yer done?” The beast condescends, voice rough. “Nae, we’ve go’ forever. Well, until yer body gives out, at least. Gonnae shove my cock down tha’ pretty throat next, I think.”

The hand still on your hip lets go. Gathering slick from between your thighs, Soap pushes his thumb against your back hole. You gasp and attempt to lurch forward, to get away, but it doesn’t work. You can’t move out from under the weight of him. You feel a glob of something land there, quickly realizing he spit on you just to gasp as his thumb pushes inside. Part of you hates that it feels good, hates the words spilling from his lips about your unused ass. The rest of you succumbs to the fullness as his thumb is replaced by a finger, then another, working you open.

You whimper, fear mixing with the ongoing growing pleasure in your gut. It’s all too much. You’re overstimulated, soft body bruised and exhausted. Filled to the brim. Soap drapes himself over you, removing his fingers with almost a pop, and sinking his sharp teeth into the crook of your neck. His arms bracket your head once again, nearly flattening your against the mattress underneath him. You cry out, tears streaming as you feel another climax approaching, your pussy drooling down your thighs.

Something deep in the back of your brain snap as you cum. You lose yourself to base instinct. The heat in the room and anger in your chest consumes you. The air burns as it enters your lungs, sparking and electrifying your skin. Your head turns, eyes locking on the strong forearm anchored just above you. On impulse you lurch up, sinking your teeth in as far as they’ll go. A dog with prey caught in it’s maw. Soap growls in your ear - deep and animalistic. His blood isn’t quite coppery, not like yours, it’s far too sweet. It only spurs you on, your fingers twisting so tightly in the sheets you hear threads pop. Your other hand reaches back to dig your nails into his upper arm, to scratch at wherever you can reach. The sounds tearing through your throat aren’t right. Aren’t human. His arm muffles them slightly, the grunts and growls becoming borderline screams as you cum again so soon.

Soap flips you again, tearing his arm away from you and planting his feet flat on the bed, using his inhuman strength to help bounce you on his lap. You snarl, nails digging into his pecs to draw more blood. It drips down your lips, onto your chest, it covers the pads of your fingers. It’s animal. You’re just an animal.

“There ye are.” He grins, eyes practically glowing.

You don’t think much of it, you can’t think at all, really. Not in words, or even images. Pure instinct drives every action, your nose flaring at the scent of sex and blood that’s filled the room. Your skin is feverish, limbs shaking. Frenzied. That’s the word. Frenzied and rabid as you reach for strength you don’t have an meet his thrusts.

The two of you keep going that way - for how long, you aren’t sure. At some point you end up on the floor, at another he holds you against the wall by your throat. At another you hear the bed frame crack in two. Claw marks and bruises litter your body - litter his, as well. He pushes his cock into your back hole, not caring about the minimal stretch. You don’t need lube, you’ve drenched the both of you enough. The last thing you’re conscious for is Soap moaning in your ear as your hands wrap around his horns, holding on with all you have as your lips meet.

When you wake, your body feels heavy. Buried under something - blankets, you think. Though, your blankets at home have never had this weight to them. It’s more than quilts - your fingers tentatively running over both the texture of soft cloths and thick furs. It feels luxury, buttery smooth under your touch. Briefly, you shut your eyes again, content to drift back into blackness out of this cozy dream.

When you do peek your eyes open, a shudder runs down your spine. This isn’t your apartment. You shoot up, looking around the odd bedroom. It’s strangely decorated. Modern but with hints of something more scattered about. The smooth, painted walls of a modern home and ornate, lit fireplace of a castle mixed with current and antique furniture alike. A large couch sits in front of the mantle with embroidered, thick blankets hanging over the back. There’s a cracked door that seems to lead into a walk in closet. The area rug covering the far half of the room is a rich emerald green embellished with flowing designs in various golds and darker tones. Drawings and random scrawl are pinned to the far wall. There’s an open sketchbook on top of an old, hardwood desk with similar designs carved into it as the mantle.

Panic begins to surge as you open the massive curtains on the wall opposite the mantle to reveal floor to ceiling windows. They’re heavy like tapestries. You realize quickly that two of the panels are sliding doors onto a balcony, though you hesitate to step out. It would only corner you further. The sky looks like fire - waves of clouds lit in orange and yellow hues. It moves to fast. Streams of flames twist and run across the sky, overtaking one another.

You swing open the only other door that doesn’t appear to be the main exit. All it leads to is a bathroom. Large and expensive but nothing abnormal. Except for your shampoo inside the shower upon further inspection. Memories flood you, the night before comes in flashes. Was it the night before? Time feels wrong. Everything feels wrong. You’re sore, eyes heavy and body weak. You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, dressed in some gauzy, black floor-length thing that leaves little to the imagination.

Just as you exit the bathroom to look for somewhere else to hide or run, the main door opens. Soap steps in, adjusting the sleeve of his t-shirt. You freeze, as if he won’t see you as long as you’re still.

It doesn’t work, of course. Those bright eyes lock onto you, thick brows raising. “Bonnie? Yer up!”

He looks… different. Less demonic. Not that anything has visibly changed much besides the fact that he’s wearing actual clothes. He simply fits into the scenery better - the room made to accommodate him. You realize part of the strangeness of it is the furniture size; meant for someone much taller and wider than you. The light helps as well, defining the contours of his face that you couldn’t make out in the dark. You back away from him as he approaches, pressing yourself against the wall as tightly as you can.

“So glad yer up. Are ye hungry? I can-“

“Where am I?” You cut him off meekly, eyes darting around the room.

“Och, my home of course.” Soap grins as if that explains anything.

“Why?” It doesn’t come out like the demand you want it to, more like a plea. Your voice cracks and you can’t meet his eye.

He tilts his head, eyes watching you, raking over you from head to toe. A predator observing it’s prey - deciding how best to catch it. “Ye live here, now.”

“What?” You gasp, trying to back further into the wall as if you could phase through it should you just try hard enough. “No- no, please! You have to let me go home! I need to go home!”

Johnny shrugs far too casually for your liking. “A soft little thing like ye? Nae, think I’ll keep ye fer the time bein’. Never met someone who could keep up like ye can. Go’ a lot of pent up energy in there, hen.”

“I don’t-“

“Yer gonnae feed me fer years tae come.” He continues as if you didn’t say anything at all, “Besides, I’ve go’ some friends tha’ I think would like ye.”

[obssessivethorn]

More Yuu Headcanons

Here are some more TWST headcanons of our favorite little shrimpy prefect that I pulled from the depths of my mind which needed to be freed. This mainly builds off of my first Yuu hc, so take a look at that if you'd like!

[Yuu Makes Constant References No One Else Gets]

[Masterlist]

Yuu humming/singing Two of Hearts if they’re in a relationship w/ Ace or just hanging out with him as a friend

Yuu refers to the cast as handsome as a casual fact and is surprised when most of them are confused/surprised/flustered by this 

“What? The guys in this school are handsome. That’s kinda just a fact.” 

Yuu being nostalgic on their Birthday 

Deuce: “I bet your family’s celebrating your birthday even if you’re not there.”

Yuu: (hopeful) “yeah. Or, who knows, this could be a whole Narnia situation and no time has passed there at all.”

Ace: “Narnia?”

Yuu: (somber) “oh, just some popular story back home. Maybe I’ll tell you guys some time.”

Ace and Deuce always wanting to hear about stories from Yuu’s home world but being too scared that it will make them sad 

Fem!Yuu being really excited to meet Deuce’s mom because they’ve been surrounded by  only guys at an all boys school for months 

Bonus: Dylla absolutely adores fem!Yuu and is more than willing to help fashion some more feminine clothing for Yuu if they ever wanted.

Bonus +1: fem!Yuu wanting to meet the cast’s moms and sisters whenever the boys mention them.

Bonus +2: All the boys’ families just accepting Yuu as their child regardless of whether they’ve met or not simply because of how often the boys talk about them 

Yuu getting really giddy and excited when they’re able to travel to a new place in twisted wonderland other than Sage’s Island (i.e. cast’s hometowns, etc.)

Yuu asking Crewel for help whenever/if they want to dye their hair 

Based on a voiceline, Crewel canonically bleaches half his hair white and maintains that to keep with his style (the dedication of that man is inspiring)

The moment Yuu realizes they’ve fallen too far down the rabbit hole and are now attached to everyone in twisted wonderland, meaning their leaving will hurt more and more with each passing day. 

The feeling of being incredibly torn between their previous life they were forced to abandon, years of work they had put in to reach the goals they wanted to accomplish, and the new friends, experiences, and opportunities before them in this new world. So they push the feeling down further with each day. Force themself to ignore the inevitable. 

They don’t want to think about the idea of who will take care of Grim when they’re gone? Or how Ace will get his assignments done if they’re not there to force him to do it. Or or who will calm deuce down enough before he gets into a fight and ruins his goal of being a perfect honor student? 

Who will be there if someone else overblots?

This one I kinda stole from Private Thoughts of a Moray Eel by @mochinomnoms, but I love the idea of Yuu, Ace, and Deuce being so close and completely comfortable with each other. I mean, they’ve gone through literal life or death situations together from the start, so it makes sense that they would be closer than most. 

But not just the closeness we see in game with them being a main friend group who always hangs out. But close physically, in the sense that there are few boundaries left between the three. 

For a few examples, I like the idea that the three will commonly be seen cuddling together or leaning on one another when they’re lounging in the courtyard or around Heartslabyul/Ramshackle. 

Ace often times has his arm around the shoulders of Yuu or Deuce. Sometimes leaning in to whisper something stupid or gossipy in their ear. 

Yuu has taken to giving the Adeuce duo kisses on their foreheads and cheeks as thanks or as a goodbye when they head back to Ramshackle with Grim. 

Deuce grew a habit of holding Yuu or Ace’s hand when he gets ticked off by some oaf he wants to punch. The two will respond by giving his hand a squeeze or rubbing a comforting thumb across the back of his hand. It’s a silent thing, no one outright acknowledges it, because it’s become such a common practice for the three. 

Another habit Deuce has developed is that he’ll face-plant directly into the lap of whoever is sitting down after a long day. The first time he did it, it was Yuu’s lap and it spooked them so much they accidentally threw their phone at Ace’s face. Deuce felt horrible after that, but after some reassurance, he started doing it more often. Albet, making sure the landing was softer than the first time. 

In response to Deuce planting his face on their thighs, Ace and Yuu both took to immediately playing with his hair and massaging his scalp with their free hand. 

Yuu’s way of asking for comfort when they're stressed or scared (which they will always refuse to admit, they swear, they just need them as a human shield! It’s just for defense!) is by hugging one of the two around their torso and ducking their head into the crook of their neck to hide their face. Most times, the hug from the back so whoever they’re hugging can’t see what they’re feeling. But they of course still love hugging from the front because the two will always respond by immediately wrapping their arms around Yuu and rubbing their back. 

Because of this slightly abnormal friendship, (I failed to describe the abnormal part here but I can always write more) there have of course been some rumors started about them being in a romantic relationship. Are they polygamous? Are Ace and Deuce fighting over Yuu in an epic and dramatic love triangle? Is Yuu playing both of the boys? Are there hidden feelings between the three they all refuse to talk about? 

While most of the school and some of their friends wonder this, the trio completely ignores it. As if the rumors don’t exist at all. When asked about their relationship or if anything being said is true, all three of them look at each other, shrug, and say completely different things. 

Jack: So, are you guys in a relationship?  Epel: Yeah, you’re all awfully close for just friends.  Sebek: Please, the details of their relationship have nothing to do with us! But if you three are romantically involved in a relationship with each other then I will support you entirely as long as it does not affect my lord.  Ortho: Well, let’s hear them out first, are you three dating each other?  Ace, Deuce, and Yuu: *tangled in a cuddle pile on Ramshackle’s couch with Grim asleep on the arm of the couch next to them* [simultaneously] Ace: Maybe. Deuce: No? why? Yuu: Only on Tuesdays. 

The main part taken from Private Thoughts of a Moray Eel is the idea where Ace and Yuu visit Deuce’s home one summer and Deuce’s mom Dylla immediately believes the three are an adorable couple. 

Regardless of whether they are, aren’t, or are secretly pining, Dylla would decide in that moment that she had two new children she would die for. (Whether through adoption or as an in-law, should secretly hopes she can have Yuu as her child) 

AdeuceYuu is probably my favorite ship in all of Twst but this concept of them being physically affectionate and comfortable with each other transcends simply being a romantic headcanon and something I personally believe to be true as platonic and any other relationship dynamic you can imagine. Because let’s be honest, all three of them need comfort from others after going through so many overblots. And who better to comfort you than the ones who stood beside you through most of those experiences.  

Yuu being seen by the cast as a very passive and soft-spoken individual who couldn’t hurt a fly even if they tried. Only, the projected image of the protag they’ve come to accept is shattered when they witness Yuu tearing a random student a new one after said student had pushed them over the edge after a very stressful day. (Separate HC post for that concept coming soon) 

Yuu, who stood against beasts, overblots, and literal titans and gods, being too scared to ask for extra ketchup in Mostro Lounge. 

Additionally, Yuu who lives with a direbeast, being afraid of squirrels (don’t ask me why, this just feels correct, so we’re going with it)

The first idea that got me to start writing twst headcanons: Yuu having a very different way of speaking in Twisted Wonderland than they do back home. Because many of the references and slang they typically use in everyday speech doesn’t make sense to anyone but them in TW, they talk less and have a very plain way of speaking compared to most people their age. Here’s how I imagine this specific scenario goes:

When hanging out with Adeuce and Grim one day, Ace brings up (jokingly) how boring the prefect sounds when speaking. 

Yuu makes a comment about how they speak very differently from how they do back home.

This piques Ace and Deuce’s interest. 

While Deuce is more reluctant to ask, Ace begins asking questions and hounding Yuu for examples and for them to say things in ways they normally would. Deuce and Grim eventually join in on the barrage of questions. 

Finally, and a little hesitantly, Yuu decided to give them one day where they talk in the way they normally would back home. 

In this case, that means a lot of references, stupid internet jokes, and generational slang.

While the majority of it goes over the heads of Yuu’s friends, prompting more questions than it does answer, it’s still a day in which they see a whole new side of Yuu. One that’s evidently more relaxed and natural for the beloved prefect. 

It’s a confusing day for most, listening to Yuu speak as if they’ve lost their mind and started spewing nonsense, but it also became one of the highlights of the school year for the cast.

I have plenty more headcanons i can rip from the crevices of my mind, so if you would like to see more let me know! I love thinking of these silly little moments and dynamics and overall making the main character feel a little more real and personal for myself and hopefully others.

@thisisafish123 (you asked to be tagged for a part 2, not exactly sure if this counts for you but I hope you enjoy!)

[littlelamy]

Maybe a Reader/Rafe scenario of that whole ‘’One likes public affection and the other does not’’, with Rafe being the one who loves it being very affectionate and Reader is perhaps a bit more shy/reserved, only clinging to him like a koala at home. But maybe they haven’t had a talk about it ever, so when Rafe is super touchy – she is very distant/uncomfortable – and he gets super moody/sad because he thinks that she is loosing feelings for him and gets in his head <3333333

a/n: hi! ugh, i love this request. rafe definitely would get confused and borderline embarrassed, but mainly because he thinks you’re rejecting him, which is something he definitely doesn’t like! i hope you like it! 🎄

it’s one of those nights where everything feels lighthearted but slightly off. you’re at topper’s place, the living room packed with friends lounging on the oversized sectional, the tv playing some action movie that nobody’s really paying attention to. you’re tucked in beside rafe, his arm slung casually over your shoulder, his presence grounding you in the midst of the chaotic chatter and laughter surrounding you.

but even though you’re sitting close to him, your body feels stiff. his fingers graze your arm absentmindedly, a motion that usually soothes you, but here, with all the people around, it feels different. too exposed.

rafe doesn’t notice—at least not right away. he leans closer, his lips brushing your temple in a soft kiss before murmuring something about the scene on the tv. it’s the kind of easy, affectionate gesture that usually makes your heart flutter, but instead, your stomach knots.

you shift slightly, trying to focus on the screen, but the warmth of his hand on your shoulder feels like it’s drawing every pair of eyes in the room. you know it’s irrational; nobody’s actually paying attention to you two, but the thought won’t leave your mind.

rafe leans in again, this time resting his hand on your thigh. the weight of it, combined with the sounds of the room, makes your skin prickle with discomfort. you freeze, trying to will yourself to relax, but it’s no use. you gently pull away, leaning forward to grab a drink off the coffee table.

“you okay?” he asks quietly, concern lacing his tone as he pulls his hand back.

“yeah,” you reply quickly, forcing a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “just thirsty.”

he doesn’t push, but you can feel his gaze lingering on you, his confusion palpable. the energy between you shifts, his usual relaxed demeanor growing tense.

the rest of the night feels awkward. rafe doesn’t touch you again, his attention divided between the movie and whatever’s swirling in his head. you hate the way things feel so out of sync, the way you’ve put that look on his face—the one that makes your chest ache.

when the group starts to wind down, rafe offers to drive you home, but instead of heading to your place, he takes you back to tannyhill. the ride is quiet, his knuckles tight on the steering wheel, and you know he’s holding back whatever’s been brewing since the couch.

once inside, he leads you to the living room, the familiar space feeling both comforting and heavy with unspoken tension. he doesn’t sit, just stands there, running a hand through his hair before finally turning to you.

“y/n,” he starts, his voice careful, “did i do something wrong tonight?”

the question makes your chest tighten. “no, rafe,” you say quickly, shaking your head. “it’s not you.”

“then what is it?” he presses, his blue eyes searching yours. “because it felt like you couldn’t wait to get away from me back there.”

his words hit you harder than you expected, and you feel the sting of guilt rise in your throat. you take a shaky breath, trying to find the right words.

“it’s just... i don’t like being that close in front of people,” you admit, your voice quiet. “it’s not that i don’t want you to touch me. i love when you do. but when we’re around others, it feels like everyone’s watching, even if they’re not. and it makes me uncomfortable.”

rafe’s brows knit together, his expression shifting from confusion to realization. he doesn’t say anything at first, just lets your words sink in.

“so it’s not me?” he asks, his voice softer now, almost hesitant. “you’re not pulling away because of me?”

“no,” you say firmly, stepping closer to him. “it’s not you. i just didn’t know how to say it. i didn’t want you to think i didn’t want you.”

his shoulders relax slightly, the tension in his posture easing as he takes a step closer to you. “you could’ve told me, y’know,” he says, his tone a mix of relief and a little frustration. “i thought... i thought you were getting tired of me or something.”

“never,” you say, reaching for his hand. “i just didn’t want to ruin the moment. but i should’ve told you. i’m sorry.”

he squeezes your hand, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “i get it now,” he says, his voice gentle. “i just... i like being close to you, y/n. and sometimes i forget that you don’t always feel the same way i do about doing that in front of people.”

you nod, your eyes meeting his. “i’ll try to be better about telling you when i feel that way. just... promise me you won’t think i’m pushing you away?”

“promise,” he says, pulling you into his arms. his embrace is warm and steady, and you feel the weight of the night finally lift.

for a moment, neither of you says anything. you just hold onto each other, the quiet between you filled with understanding.

“thank you,” you whisper, your voice muffled against his chest.

he kisses the top of your head, his arms tightening around you. “always.”

taglist: @namelesslosers @maybanksangel @averyoceanblvd @iknowdatsrightbih @starkeysprincess @sixrosberg @anamiad00msday @ivysprophecy @wearemadeofstardust0 @kissrotten @rafesangelita @sstargirln @rafedaddy01 @soldesole @bakugouswaif @skywalker0809 @vanessa-rafesgirl @evermorx89 @aariahnaa @outerhills @ditzyzombiesblog

[starzify]

DRUNK - tara carpenter

PAIRING tara carpenter x fem!reader

WARNINGS smut 18+

MASTERLIST

↓ MDNI ↓

You and Tara despised each other and you had no idea why. Ever since your friend group introduced you to her, she looked at you as if you shot her family.

“I don’t wanna see her, she’s so scary.” You whined about Tara, fixing up your makeup in the car as you were on your way to a frat party that Mindy begged you to go to. “Womp womp, you’re gonna have to see her everyday anyway.” Mindy shrugged, not caring for your complaints. You sighed in annoyance. “Cheer up, sad girl. You’re at your first frat party!” She yelled, lightening up the mood. You laughed, shaking your head.

You entered the party, music blasting in your ears and your nose scrunching at the scent of alcohol and sweat. “I’ll be right back.” Mindy whispered to you and you nodded. You looked around, trying to see if you could another one of your friends until spotted Tara at the counter, taking shots of tequila. You stood next to her, filling up a shot glass with tequila. Tara looked you up and down, plastering a smirk on her face. “I’ve never thought of you as the tequila type of girl.” She said. “Not like you would know.” You bit back. The smug look on her face immediately turned into a scowl. “Okay. Since you’re such a smartass, let’s see who can down the most tequila shots. You in?” She challenged. “Bet.” You accept.

Next thing you know, you two are drunk out your minds and giggling like maniacs. Tara gulps, looking at you with hooded eyes. “Wanna make out?” She slurred. “Huh?” You yelled, not being able to hear her voice over the loud music. “I said do you wanna make out?” She yelled louder. “Okay.” You slurred, giggling like crazy until she shut you up with a kiss. Her soft lips hooked with yours as you ran your fingertips through her wavy hair, moving down to her soft skin. She pulled away, running upstairs with you and locking yourselves in a random room before pushing you on the bed as she got on top of you.

Her lips attached to your neck, sucking and biting which left bruises on your neck, eliciting a moan from you. Tara took off your top, revealing your perky breasts. She stared at them in awe before wrapping her lips around your nipple while rolling the other one between her fingers. She got lower, gently placing her hands on your belt as she looked at you with hungry eyes. “Can i?” She asks. “Please.” That’s all it took for her to unbuckle your belt and pull down your denim skirt and panties.

She licked a long stripe up your slit, making you gasp. Little lickings turned into sucks. “Tara…” You moaned, your hands grabbing onto the roots of her hair. She looked up at you with her big brown eyes and giggled which sent vibrations straight to your pussy. Tara replaced her tongue with her fingers. “Fuck!” You cried out, the pleasure being too much for you. “You like when I fuck you with my fingers, hm?” She teased, making you almost impossibly wet and you nodded. She thrusted her fingers in and out, fast and hard and your brain went mush.

“I- I’m gonna…” She was fucking you so dumb that you couldn’t even properly form a sentence. “You’re gonna cum on my fingers?” Tara asked with a smile. “Uh huh.” You nodded. “Cum for me, love.” She demanded and you let go, your eyes rolling back as you mumbled incoherent words. As you came down from your high, your eyes met Tara’s, sinister smile on face. She leaned down to you, her lips just a few inches away from your ear. “We’re not done yet.” She whispered.

[awordsmith]

where you came from 𝜗𝜚 s.r

۶ৎ in which you receive a letter detailing the death of your grandfather, head back to your hometown, and wonder if you ever should have left.

katcember

who? spencer reid x bau!reader when? s8 category: angst to fluff (comfort) content warnings: proofed! not much sad angst (more sad angst if that makes any sense), death of a family member/funeral, reader's hometown is in Europe (purely for aesthetic), more plot than spencer (kind of idk) reid with warmth word count: 11.2k a/n: this was my one of my first ideas when first posting on tumblr so i really do hope you enjoy it! there are a few words not in english, but sometimes when writing in english it's easier to say something in another language because english can be really...corny sometimes...anyway ily cari !!

The loops and curves connecting the words in that elegant font you grew up learning stuck in the back of your mind like a non-removable tumor. You could feel it. You had a time limit–but not to live. Two days. In two days you would go back to Europe, back to a continent you had thought you’d left behind years ago, a place you had thought you held no attachment to… no emotion.

Maybe, though, it was the fact that you had been gone so long, had not once gone to visit in all your time in America, and now–now your time had run out–or rather, another, no longer invisible hourglass had lost the last of its sand and someone had flipped it again, setting a new timeline in motion.

Your grandpa, your beloved nonno*–oh how you just couldn’t believe it. 

It had hit you so suddenly, your mother normally sent you letters, you didn’t mind her old ways, she was raised by the man who taught you cursive and calligraphy–with craft you thought ancient, and technology was still rather new, and she wasn’t one to conform to change.

You sighed, shifting in your seat as Hotch and the rest of the team gave the profile. The lights were too bright; you stared at the floor, one leg crossed over the other, and your arms folded. You tried keeping your focus. Yes, you were dealing with your own problems, and yes, you had just gotten the letter yesterday, but these children needed you now–and if you couldn’t be at your best with a personal issue weighing on your shoulders, could you even call yourself an FBI agent?

Emily had just left the team a month ago and her replacement wasn’t bad, but she wasn’t Emily. You desperately needed your friend right now, your soul sister. She could tell you what to do and how to handle things like this, she’s been doing this a lot longer than you, has more experience–and she understood you, at least where family matters were concerned.

“You okay?” Spencer whispered as the officers went back to their desks or collected in groups–some even leaving–probably to talk about the best course of action. This guy was going to strike again, every indication of it was there on the board.

“Yeah,” you sighed, feeling your stomach growl.

He furrowed his brows, “when’s the last time you ate?”

“Uhm,” you stood, rubbing your wrist, “I’m not sure, but I’m fine, really,” you gave him a tight smile walking over to the board, “We know he’s targeting school busses on their drop off, he’s insecure about something, his physical strength? That’s the only reason he’d subdue the bus driver in a blitz attack.”

Spencer called your name–almost as a whine–and you paused. “Look,” he said, “I don’t think the rest of the team’s noticed, so if you eat, I won’t say anything…”

You frowned, rubbing an eye, “fine.”

You’d think a look of triumph came over him, but you’d be wrong. He looked resigned, but not indifferent, it was more of a soft relief. Spencer had no idea what you were going through, you hadn’t told anyone–and you weren’t really planning on it. You liked to keep your personal life separate from work as much as possible, that’s one of the reasons you and Emily had clicked so well–you were nearly identical in that department, and, well, you both could agree Clyde was a little bit of an ass. You’d never worked directly with her during her Interpol days, but when she left, Clyde became your team lead, and–well, actually, that’s, pretty self-explanatory.

A few years in, you were able to transfer to the BAU, you’d performed considerably well and Clyde had recommended and vouched for you and–well, Emily knew Clyde, okay perhaps your connections helped a little, but was it really your connections or your skill because without your skill, you wouldn’t have been recommended now would you have?

Regardless, you had known how massive the opportunity was, which is why you’d said yes without a second thought. You joined the team two years ago, when Emily had shown no sign of leaving. You sighed, rubbing your hands together, they were sweaty and you felt sick, maybe you should try eating something.

“Alright,” you affirmed again, “come on you’re driving.”

You threw the keys that had been lying on the table next to the board at Spencer, he’d been close to Emily too, you assumed they still spoke sometimes when they got the chance as you did with her. Your mutual bond was probably–at least you considered it the most probable–reason for why you grew so close in such a short amount of time.

You were close in age, too, which you assumed added to the comfort.

Spencer took you to the closest fast food and you ate in the car devouring each bite. He asked for coffee and “real” sugar on the side, and then he sat there and watched you eat, and when you were finished he drove you back to the police station. 

The case took you to Santa Monica, California. Penelope had ushered you all into the room as soon as you’d got into the office this morning, honestly, you were expecting it, and with the hurriedness she had, you knew it couldn’t be anywhere near good–though you considered none of the cases you received “good”, this one involved children, and it seemed they were the prime target, but what you couldn’t figure out was why.

He didn’t kill all the children–in fact, in both cases, the unsub only killed three kids; it seemed as if he was targeting specific children, but they all came from relatively different backgrounds, and both schools–when considering the environment and looking at it from a geographical perspective–weren’t at all in near-to-similar neighborhoods. Even the two kids that were killed on the same bus had no connection, they weren’t friends, the witnesses said the boys stayed away from each other unintentionally, they just never seemed to cross paths and it just did not make sense.

You wanted–no needed–to figure this out, for the next potential victims–but the team had no clue as to which school he’d hit next. For this reason, Penelope was emailing schools at the masses to keep them on high alert.

“He’s targeting school buses,” you said, taking a sip of your water. “Not schools…” Spencer nodded and you asked, “Why?”

“Perhaps something happened to him on a school bus?”

“It’s important,” you agreed, “but wouldn’t that make him–like–fifteen?”

“No,” Spencer shook his head, “a fifteen-year-old wouldn’t have this much time, he’d have been caught by now.”

“The survivors say he wore a mask, he called the students by name–”

“But not their name–maybe he’s living in a delusion?” Spencer’s speaking sped up, “maybe he’s not fifteen but he’s reliving his teenage days. Maybe he was bullied and now he wants revenge?”

“Okay, but that doesn’t explain going after high school kids now. Why not just go after the people his anger is directed toward?”

“Because he can’t? Maybe they’re substitutes?”

“We need to tell the others.”

Spencer nodded, you rushed out of the car and into the police station, catching Morgan, Hotch, and JJ leaning over a phone, talking to Penelope. You explained your theory and funnily enough, Penelope had just found school records that supported it. Each victim had been suspended within the past year, accused of bullying or inflicting some type of physical or mental pain on another student.

Complaints about the victims were filed by students, so now you knew your unsub had access to all this information, the question was what title did someone need in order to garner this details.

“That has to be how he’s choosing his victims,” Morgan said.

Hotch thought for a second, then nodded, “All alright, call Rossi and Blake, tell them to get here, Penelope, are you still on?”

“Running and ready, sir,” she confirmed, “All alright, give me a list of the next potential targets, all kids who have been suspended or complained about in the last year due to bullying, narrow the search to males, fifteen older.”

“Sir, do you want me to narrow the search between the two schools?”

“No,” Hotch sighed, looking each of you in your eyes, “I want the entire city–”

“Hotch–” 

Spencer’s eyes narrowed in confusion, but Hotch cut him off, “you really want to sit around waiting for another body?”

Everyone went silent and Spencer’s eyes flitted to you for a moment, almost as in reassurance.

“He’s right, Hotch,” you stepped forward, trying to push away all thoughts of what was to be expected of you in two days.

“You,” Hotch narrowed his eyes as if just now suspecting something was up with you. 

A silent staring contest ensued, though it was quickly broken when an officer burst into your makeshift bullpen. “Another body was discovered.” Your heart sunk and you glanced to Spencer for comfort, his eyes drifting to yours for the same thing.

It always just seemed a little bit more painful when children were involved. Your stomach lurched and you felt sick, wanting to throw up the food you’d just eaten. You just wanted this all to be over so you could focus on your family issues. It might have been selfish, but wasn’t that your right? You couldn’t think about this right now, you needed to find this guy before he murdered another innocent kid.

“Give Garcia the geographical point and have her narrow the search.”

Hotch directed at Spencer, turning to JJ, “Stay here, help him and Rossi figure out what career our unsub might have. Morgan go Blake to check out the new crime scene, and,” he turned to you, “Come with me.”

You turned to Spencer one last time, not wanting to leave him. You were always together, working together, that is. Hotch never split you up so you thought there must be a reason for it now, but why, well, you couldn’t know for certain. You shook your head and followed him out the door. He seemed to wait for you with pause, his expression unreadable, almost like he was analyzing you. You tilted your head in warning and he finally relented.

“Let’s go.”

From that point forward, there wasn’t really much of a struggle, it just sucked you had been called in so late, and that another kid had died before you caught the guy. Four kids in total, three crime scenes. The ride back on the jet was tense.

Everyone seemed to need their own space whenever you dealt with a case like this, you, well, you’d play with Spencer’s hair, if you were really tired, he’d let you lean against his shoulder or use his lap as a pillow and sleep. This time, though, you were restless and you couldn’t find the need to sleep anywhere. You knew you probably should,but…it was just too much.

You couldn’t stay seated, you paced back and forth, your mind fleeting from the case to the letter you’d received yesterday. You’d brought it with you and you hesitated only for a second before pulling it from your bag and sitting in one of the empty rows. You could feel eyes on you, though they were trying to pretend they weren’t looking.

You wanted to say you could see them, say you weren’t in need of monitoring, but you were the youngest on the team, and despite your closeness, with Emily particularly, they all cared for you, which is why when JJ slid into the seat across from you you resisted rolling your eyes.

“Are you okay? You’ve been kind of… not yourself.”

“I’m fine, JJ, thanks.” You returned your eyes to your mother’s letter.

“You sure?” she asked, “is it your mother? Has something happened?”

She motioned toward the letter. They’d gotten accustomed to seeing you read over the renaissance looking artifacts throughout the day. That wasn’t the unusual part, no JJ was talking about how you weren’t attached to Spencer’s hip, how you avoided them all almost the entire day, and how you had been so focused on the case as if you were trying to make something else dissappear.

“We’re all here for you, you know.” She reached her hand out, rubbing her thumb over it.

“Yeah,” Morgan motioned for JJ to scoot over, “we’re a family, you know.”

“Aww, I wish I was there,” Penelope said from the other side of Morgan’s phone. You wanted to scoff, but a sad smile pressed to your mouth instead. They were cornering you as if they’d planned it.

Your eyes flitter over toward Rossi and Hotch who were pretending not to listen and Blake, who was evidently really not, then they landed on Spencer’s who stood suddenly from his normal spot in the front of the jet and began walking toward you. “See, even pretty boy’s upset.”

“I am not upset,” Spencer scoffed, sliding into the seat next to you. But then he held your gaze as if trying to communicate with his eyes, “but we are here for you, you know I’m always here, and…I’m sure if you called, Emily would be too.”

You took a breath, and when it came out it was shuddering, and that was the first time crying had crossed your mind. So, you said–first in general, “My grandfather just passed, I’m supposed to leave in two days for his funeral.” You let them take it in, then, “I need time off, Hotch.”

A snort came from Rossi and the team frowned at him, but you smiled, why was he so unserious all the time? You rolled your eyes, but then Penelope spoke up from the phone in Morgan’s pocket, “if you need someone to go with you, I’d be willing.”

Your eyes swelled at her offer and you opened your mouth to say ‘Really?’ but Spencer said, “I’d go too–you know, if you wanted that is,” before you could open your mouth.

“Thank you,” you nodded, “I’d like that…and you know…it wouldn’t hurt if the rest of you came as well,” your admission scared you, what were you doing? This is the exactly the opposite response Emily would have given, but maybe you weren’t as strong as Emily, and maybe…maybe that was okay.

“When are we leaving again?” Rossi sighed, pulling out his phone, “I’ll have to check my schedule.” And with that you let loose a snort, appreciating the kindness of your team.

“Jack, Will, and Henry are welcome to come as well.” You said, “And that girlfriend of yours, Hotch,” you added, “I think I’d be able to brave my family again if I had the Guardians of the Galaxy with me.”

“What about Strauss?” JJ suddenly asked, “What are we gonna tell her?”

“Oh you let me worry about her,” Blake smiled, though you had been sure she wasn’t even listening.

“You’re from Europe right?”

You huffed a sigh, “Yes, Rossi, I’m sure we’re not cousins.”

A few chuckled as Rossi responded with a nod and a smug grin,  “Just checking.”

You claimed the window seat, forcing Spencer to sit in the middle, though you had to climb over him multiple times to use the bathroom, you didn’t care, and neither did he…much. You thought you’d be able to sleep, but just like on the jet, you found yourself restless, and Spencer, well, he couldn’t help but ask.

The first question was simple, “how do you feel about going home?”

You laughed, a bitter expression framing your face, “I don’t know.” You were lying, though he wasn’t sure if you knew that fact yourself as you seemed genuine. The only way he knew for sure your response wasn’t what your subconscious truly thought was was by the way your lips pressed together right before you spoke, that was your tell.

He didn't know if you knew you did it, but he’d caught on to it pretty quickly when you’d first met, it had been something small, but he remembered it as clearly as if it were playing out right now in front of him. It had to do with your favorite food. Morgan had said he’d overheard you talking to Emily about how you wanted a certain order from this new restaurant because it tasted like the one you had back home, and to surprise you, he had brought it in one day and set it on your desk, brimming with energy to see your reaction.

You were confused at first, but when you saw him, you’d grinned, prying to box open, then your eyebrows had shot up and he’d asked you if it was your favorite food. You’d pressed your lips together and nodded, grimacing with the first bite, “I love it, thank you.”

Later on, he’d smacked Morgan for the first time upside the head, running away quickly after, Morgan had chased him for some time until Hotch had told them to stop acting like, “idiots,” and thst, “Jack acthas better self control than you two most days.”

“Do you have any pets at home?” He asked, watching you stretch out your arms above your head, deflating against your seat.

You smiled, “I used to have a dog, but she died before I left for university.”

“I’m sorry,” he frowned.

“Don’t be, she wasn’t really mine, but my sister’s.”

He nodded, it was early morning, everyone had gotten up way before they’d wanted to, except him. He was ready to go a bit too early, and when he’d picked you up at your apartment, it seemed as if you hadn’t slept much either.

“Hey, Spencer?” You suddenly whispered.

“Yeah?” He stared down at you as you began to move, causing him to shift until his body aligned with yours and your back hit his chest.

“Do you want to hear a boring story?” He quirked a brow, brushing a few strands of hair out of your face. To the normal eye, you seemed incredibly close, strangely close–a couple kind of close, but to the team and between the two of you, it was more like the relationship Penelope and Dereck had, although instead of heaty words, it was comforting gestures like this, that, and you were always attached at the hip, you were partners with each other before anyone else, work partners that is.

“What’s a boring story?” He asked and you didn’t know if he was trying to be poetic, but it brought a smile to your face.

“My grandfather,” you focussed your eyes on the window, finding warmth in being pressed against him, his arms acting as a blanket that wrapped around you. “He was old in age, I mean, I knew that even when I was a kid, but there were times,” you shook your head recalling the moments in your mind.

Spencer kept quiet, listening intently as he rubbed circles on the exposed inner corner of your elbow.

“He would take me on adventures and back then, he seemed so young, so exceptionally immortal. It was otherworldly,” your voice got quieter as you continued, “I don’t know how to face him,” you sighed–God it seemed like all you could do for the past 45 hours was sigh.

“Tell me,” he whispered, “tell me about the adventures.”

You paused, turning your head slightly to see him, you’d done this countless times, but for some reason, it seemed more pertinent now. More….significant, “my grandad,” you murmured, “he was my captain. That was the game. We’d go to the pier sometimes, or the forest, and he’d always have these elaborate scavenger hunts set up in advance. He really–” you blinked and breathed, “...he was really good at things like that.”

“Setting up games?” Spencer asked incredulously, but you knew it was good-natured, meant to bring the smile that had so evidently fallen off back to your face.

“At crafting and cultivating imagination.”

“Ah,” Spencer nodded, “yeah how did I miss that?”

You smacked is chest playfully.

“How do you feel about seeing your family, how long has it been?”

You gazed out the window again, there was low chatter around the plain, it was dark, the lights were off, and most people were asleep. You pondered briefly about why Spencer was still up and deigned to ask him when sunlight shone through the window, blinding you momentarily. It wasn’t a lot nor was it as bright as you were used to, and it was quickly hidden behind the clouds once more, but you smiled at it anyway.

“A new beginning,” you raised your hand, blocking the slight sunlight that filtered in now and then, not really sure what you meant.

Spencer chuckled, reaching out to grab your wris. He held it, waving it around as if you were casting a non-verbal spell.

“We don’t have to talk about it now,” he whispered, “but whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here.”

“I know you will,” you replied as easily as if you hadn’t said anything at all. “You always are.”

And again, for a moment, you pondered why that was, why Spencer always seemed to be the only person–other than Emily–who was always there for you when you needed someone, why he was the only person you wanted there when things went wrong. 

It was a question that had bubbled up over the last month since Emily had left. You’d begun to lean on him a lot more, yes, but you could very well just have as easily called Emily. Spencer wasn’t lying, you knew she would pick up no matter what, but oddly, you found you didn't want to call her because–you already had the person you needed with you. And he would always be there, even if you stopped working together, Spencer would always be there.

You were sure you could call him in the middle of the night and he’d come running. But why would you want to? You shook the dangerous thought away. 

“It’s sunrise,” he said, pulling your attention back to the window. Slowly, he brought your hand to once again rest on your stomach.

“We still have about 5 hours,” you sighed, noting the time.

He leaned back, shifting in his seat, “Then we better get comfortable.”

You wondered what you’d do first when you landed, would you have so much jet lag you wouldn’t be able to see your family for some time? Would you be able to sleep? Finally? Where would your grandpa be? Probably at the funeral home. Would other family members be traveling into the city for the funeral? If they were they’d have to stay at the main house, there wewould be no other space available in the others.

You were only staying three days, and if Stauss called you in early, you’d have no choice, but to leave before that. You were able to solve one more case before you left, though you had still strained for sleep, everyone else seemed to be a little overly excited. Blake stayed to help other teams, she was new and you weren’t that close, though she didn’t seem to mind.

She was like Rossi in that department, unable to take days away from work as she ran on catching these guys. But for you, and everyone else on the team, you were sure, you couldn’t wait for your days off.

They were the closest thing you got to normalcy, that and time with Spencer outside of work, it was time in your world, one where bad guys didn’t exist, one where you could escape into the realities of a Charlotte Bontë novel, one your grandpa had gifted you before you could remember a life without it.

You wanted to thank Spencer, but you didn’t know how. You wanted to thank everyone, really, but Spencer most of all, and instead of thinking about why, of letting it plague your thoughts, you leaned further into him, rubbed your face into his soft sweater vest, and closed your eyes.

Penelope threw her head back as she grabbed her suitcase, “where to now?” Spencer pushed her sunhat out of the way. She was in for a rude awakening, it was winter in Europe, and though most people were on holiday, that only meant the airports would be extra lively.

“First, let’s make sure we have everyone.” You began counting of heads, narrowing your eyes, “where’s Hotch?”

“We’re here!” Jack came running, Hotch sprinting after him. It was not too odd a sight, for you to see Hotch in dad mode, he normally had that look on when Spencer did something stupid or Penelope said too much on speaker–but this, oh this was gold.

Rossi snapped a photo with an old camera he’d brought along, chuckling when Hotch glared at him. “Alright,” you nodded, noting Hotch’s girlfriend slowly filling the space beside him. “Now, my immediate family isn’t that big, but the rest of the family does live in the same town, so you’ve all been assigned housemates.”

“Housemates?” JJ raised a brow.

“I’ll,” you checked the time, “explain on the train, come on.”

You were honestly surprised everyone had come, you’d invited them because you truly had thought them being here would lessen the pain, but to think that they all wanted to be here for you as well, even Rossi had come–and he hated taking vacation time. Though, the most surprising had to be the fact that Blake had actually succeeded in getting Straus to let you all come.

You stayed together, it was easy for some, though others kept getting sidetracked. You stopped a few times to look at a few shops and monuments, though you kept explaining to Penelope she’d have more than enough time later to go on her mini explorations.

You supposed it was normal though, that was how you were your first time in America–your first time in any new country or state, really. Most everyone had never been to Europe, even for you it felt like stepping into a storybook. You hadn’t been home in so long, it was like a lost memory.

Though afternoon, the day was getting dark already, and people were milling about, readying for Christmas–your heart lurched, and though you tried not thinking about him too much, you couldn’t help but wonder if your grandfather had been alone during his passing, what were his last words? His last thoughts? Rainclouds not only drew to the sky but your mind as well.

You felt more than guilty, that was the only way you could describe the horrid emotion twisting in your gut ever since you’d received the letter. You hadn’t seen your parents–your sister–face to face in a long time. It was part of the guilt of moving to America without giving them a heads up and for leaving when you knew they wanted you to stay.

Your older sister had stayed, why couldn’t you have? There really was no explanation other than you just couldn’t. It felt small, suffocating. You loved your hometown, but eventually, you knew there had to be something more out there, something more calling your name, and the longer you stayed, the more you buried that feeling, the less motivated to do anything you got.

So, you saved up during your uni days and took the first position in America you’d found, which is how you ended up at Interpol, climbing the ranks slowly but surely and eventually working with Clyde.

You reached the train station, the cool weather making everything around you a tint of blue. The benches that sat in front of the train tracks were taken up by Jack, Henry, and Will, who’d been carrying a ton of baby supplies. You paused, checked your watch again, nodded, and turned your face toward everyone again, “Alright people, here’s the plan. My family knows you're coming, one of the reasons they were okay with it is because we own a few properties and can house you all, hence your housemates, or if you prefer, hosts.” You glanced at JJ, “You, Will, and Henry will be staying with my sister and her husband. She has two kids so she’s used to the noise.”

You had thought about letting Hotch stay with your sister, but that would have just been too weird. No, instead you’d paired Hotch up with one of your cousins, who was married, but had no kids. Jack was older, no longer in diapers, and had a controlled temper, so it seemed perfect.

You relayed this information and moved on, “Penelope and Morgan, you’re staying with my aunt and uncle on my dad’s side, trust me, you’ll be thanking me–and Rossi, you’re with my aunt an uncle on my mom’s side Is that everyone then?” You looked around, nodding.

“Hang on,” Rossi held up a hand, “I don’t like the way you said that last part.”

“That’s everyone then?” You ignored him, “All alright, the train should be here–” You cut off your sentence as the train pulled into the station, “...right on time.”

 Waiting your turn to step onto the train as people made their way off, you felt around in your pocket for the letter one last time, sighing in relief when you it was still there. You grabbed your suitcase and began pulling it aboard the train when Spencer grabbed your arm and held you back. You glanced at everyone else boarding the train, making sure you had time before turning back, “Uhm,” he frowned, looking awkward, “where am I staying?”

“Hmm?” Your eyebrows furrowed and you looked at your watch again, “with me and my parents.” You said it so simply, as if it were an afterthought–as if it was so incredibly obvious that you didn’t think you had to mention it.

“Oh,” he didn’t know how to feel, he was a little embarrassed, but there was something else…sick? He didn’t know, but it made him bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling.

“Come on,” you latched your hand onto his wrist and yanked him onto the train, “before it leaves without us.”

You honestly wanted to go straight to your parent's house, but you knew you had to introduce your co-workers/friends to your family so when you left it wasn’t so weird, though the only one who complained was Rossi, you couldn’t blame him, but at the same time you found it funny. He swore up and down you had put him in this position on purpose and he didn’t find it funny–“Not one bit,” he’d said right before you left him in his room. “I’ll get you back for this,” he’d warned.

Once you’d left JJ, Will, and Henry at your sisters–she hadn’t been home, thank God, as you didn’t think you could face her just yet–you and Spencer hailed a cab and had all but drifted off to sleep during the ride to your childhood home. Your mom had been the firstborn, so she’d gotten the main house, though your grandparents never left. They had kind acted as your second parents growing up and you were incredibly close, especially you and your grandfather…and now he was gone. You bit the inner corner of your cheek, feeling like you wanted to cry but just couldn’t find the comfort to do so.

Spencer noticed, of course, that you were leaning on him, and had been the entire cab ride. When the it came to a stop in front of a large, three-story Victorian house, he hesitated before shaking you awake. He wouldn’t have done it if he knew what to do, but this wasn’t his house and this was the first time he was going to meet your parents, though it excited him, he couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason why.

You were like–his platonic soulmate, nothing had ever happened between you two and just because you were going to be sleeping in the same house, probably a few feet apart, didn’t mean anything was going to start now. Morgan slept at Penelope’s all the time and though Spencer always suspected they were more, nothing had ever happened, which meant it was possible for a guy and a girl to just be friends–and yet, here is was, palms sweating, mind running, mouth drying as he walked up the trail leading to the front door of your parent’s house.

A knock, and hushed whispers, and then the door opened, your mother standing in the doorway with a bright smile on her face. She called your name and wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into a hug. You wondered if your grandpa was at the funeral home still, if he was cold, which was a stupid thought, he couldn’t feel anything, he was gone, no longer here roaming the earth, telling his outdated jokes and taking you on secret journey’s, and you were no longer that little girl who laughed at his outdated jokes and believed in the magic of his secret journeys.

When you pulled away your mother, with her now thinning, grayed hair pulled into a tight ponytail and the wrinkles lining her frail face–said, “Oh, let me get a look at you.” 

She took a step back and that’s when your father came into view, “Dad,” you smiled, the feeling almost overwhelming.

He pulled you into another hug, and just when you didn’t know if you could handle seeing one more relative you hadn’t seen in ages, your grandmother shouted from somewhere on the first floor, “Is that her? Is she here?”

Your heart seized itself and you took a step back, unknowingly stepping into Spencer’s personal space. You turned to apologize, but your grandmother had already wobbled in on her two dainty legs, as quickly as she could have if in her prime. Her old crone eyes narrowed, “nice of you to grace us with your presence.” She sprinkled salt on the floor as she glowered.

“Mom,” your mother groaned.

“What?” She crossed her arms and turned her head as if she had things better to do than welcome the granddaughter–who’d left everything behind–back into her life.

“It’s fine, Mom,” you reassured as your father went to close the door behind you’d walked in, Spencer gled to your back.

Your grandmother stomped out of the room in old lady fashion. “How are you dear? Have you been getting my letters?”

You cringed, “Yes,” though you never sent one back, you did always text a message, thanking your mom for writing you, she’d only heart it, though, which left you wondering if maybe you should’ve picked up a pen and paper. “I keep them all secure in a drawer.”

She nodded, a placid smile falling to her lips, “Well, you must be tired and–” she glanced at you, then at Spencer, then at your father and held his gaze for a moment before returning her eyes to you, “who’s your…”

“Oh, this is Spencer,” you patted his chest as if that was explanation enough.

Your mother nodded, not really sure how to take it, she turned to Spencer, hoping he’d offer a little more information, “It’s nice to meet you.”

Spencer stared at her hand, contemplating and you were just about to say something about it when he reached out and shook it. Slack-jawed, you eyed him suspiciously, turning away in a huff. When you’d first met him, he’d refused to shake your hand, sure he had come a long way since then, but it still annoyed you for some reason.

“Come, let me show you your rooms.”

Your mother led you up the starcase than faded into a small stairwell, leading up to the second floor. The wood was old mahogany, though you weren’t paying much attention to it. At the end of the left hall was another staircase that led to the third floor, but even half awake you knew it was probably locked. It always had been. 

You recognized the wallpaper, a deep, forest green and you half wondered if the wallpaper in your bedroom had changed, if it had been converted into a guest bedroom. Your mother gave Spencer the guest room down the hall. You waved goonight to him before heading into your room. He paused his eyes taking in your childhood home.

It was so incredibly different from his, but it also felt…small. You were this giant, bubble of energy and a quiet town in Europe just dind’t seem to add up to your personality. He sighed and pulled open the door, you weren’t a few steps away like he had hoped, but you were close enough. He stopped himself–this was completely bizarre, even for him. This was more up–well, he didn’t know, but it wasn’t up his alley.

Tired, you’d turned in for the night, though your eyes caught on all the things you’d left behind, you told yourself you’d look at it in the morning. You were glad everyone was here supporting you, you were especially glad to have Spencer–were glad he came, but then of course he came, that was just the kind of person he was.

You turned off the lamp on the bedside table, burying your face in the sheets, finding yourself still unable to cry, but whispering, “You would have liked him a lot, nonno*.” Which was madness, firstly, why did it matter if you grandfather would have liked Spencer or not. Secondly, your grandfather was gone, and the whole reason you were here was because of that fact. Maybe you just couldn’t accept it yet and that’s why you were thinking all these weird thoughts, why you couldn't cry.

You sighed, shutting your eyes, hoping you wouldn’t dream; to face tomorrow, you would just need sleep. Sleep and a lot of quiet.

You cracked open one eye, light trickling in through the curtains though it wasn’t bright. You left your door ajar as you headed toward the bathroom. There was soft chatter on the first floor, and you were sure your grandmother and parents were awake. The faint aroma of coffee wafted through the air and you wondered if Spencer was up too.

You didn’t have to wait long to find out as he stepped out of the bathroom just as you went to open the door. His hair was wet and he was wearing a white collared shirt under a brown sweater vest. He smiled when he saw you, though your eyes were drawn to the water dripping down his forehead. He was holding a towel, you assumed to try and dry it, though it looked if he hadn’t had much success.

“Morning.” You murmured.

“Good morning,” he echoed, stepping out of the way. “You’re parents said I could,” he motioned behind him, pressing his lips together when you raised a brow. He nodded, “hurry? I am kind of nervous.”

You snorted and shook your head, “sure thing, piccolo*.”

You shut the bathroom door behind you, feeling an airy sensation float through your body as you began pulling your clothes off.

Half an hour later, you found Spencer in his room still trying to dry his hair. “You should just let it air dry.” You voiced, tucking a lock of your own wet hair behind your ear.

He looked up when you opened the door, sighing, and setting the hand towel to the side. His hair was nearly dry, though he was trying to get the wet bits in the back. 

You huffed, climbing on the bed and sitting behind him on your knees, “let me see it.” You began massaging the now-damp towel into his hair, trying to use the little dry parts it still had left. He chuckled, jerking his head slightly when the towel rubbed a sensitive spot. You smirked, “that tickle?”

He huffed another laugh, “stop,” he called your name in warning, “I’m serious.”

You laughed, running the towel teasingly up and down his neck. He jerked and eventually jumped up, pushing you backward on accident. He launched a tickle attack, fingers jabbing at your sides, your neck, under your arms, and when you thought he couldn’t get any worse, he sought your feet, your sockless feet.

“Okay!” You snorted, “Okay, you win!”

“What?” He asked, staring down at you with triumph.

“Oh, don’t be an ass.” 

He grinned playfully, but relented, “Alright, come on, your parents probably want to see you.”

You huffed a sigh and threw your head back, the pillows coming to its rescue as you let your hands come to rest on your stomach, “do we have to?” His grin eased into a gentle smile and you gave in, jumping up, “Yeah, fine.” 

You headed downstairs, passing picture frames from past relatives. There were so many ancient trinkets that your generations had left behind, Spencer said it was like walking through time, and it honestly was. Not just because the house was built in the middle 1800s, but because everything from the wallpaper to the furniture, and right down to the people still living in it–had that reminiscent aura about them.

“Nice of you to join us.” Your grandmother said as you walked in, “And who’s this, a boyfriend?”

Your mother sent hers a warning glare before turning back to you, “good morning, please sit,” she motioned toward the breakfast table.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Spencer said taking the seat beside you, “again.”

Your mother laughed and waved a hand, “There is no need for formalities, but I do want to thank you for coming.” She glanced at you momentarily, but you avoided her eyes. You knew you would eventually have to speak to everyone again, but you weren’t ready for that yet.

“So, how long have you been dating my daughter?” Your father asked. You would have choked on the tea had you drunk any prior. Your eyes widened instead and you turned to Spencer apologetically, but he didn’t seem at all fazed, “we’re just friends.”

His smile seemed content, but your grandmother scoffed. You turned to her, almost already fed up with the little attitude that’d been present since your arrival. You knew she had always preferred the company of your sister, and she detested you for leaving without a word–not to her, but to your grandfather.

You frowned, wanting to ask about it, but you couldn’t find words that would bring the least amount of sadness to the room. 

“Are you going out today?” Your father changed the subject, turning toward Spencer. He seemed to catch on to the fact that you were uncomfortable, so he directed all his questions at your beloved pretty boy.

Spencer answered them with ease–to which you knew you’d be in debt. An hour went by and Penelope was blowing up the team group chat, asking when you were meeting up. Eventually, you knew you’d have to take her around town and to be honest, you could use a little distraction from the looming presence of being around the rest of your family when they got in this afternoon.

“When will you be back?” Your mother asked

“Not sure,” you replied, more clipped than you meant for it to be.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on her,” Spencer reassured, trying to ease the tension.

“Oh, I’m sure you will,” your grandmother poked her head out of nowhere.

You shot her a glare and said, “Is this your way of seeing me off?”

Shocked by your reply, she tutted and jerked her head away, with closed eyes and crossed arms. You rolled your eyes, whispering, “see you later,” in the softest voice you could manage.

“That was…”

You huffed, wrapping your arms around yourself, “tell me about it.”

“So…your grandmother…”

“She hates me because I left, deep down they all do.” You frowned, but no tears came, they seemed to evade you.

Spencer pressed his lips together, normally he had the perfect response for anything you said, but you never spoke about your family. You were always sure to draw a boundary, you were very much like Emily in that sense, or at least he thought so.

You took a cab to the pier, agreeing to meet at the beach seemed simple. There were a few people, mostly locals though, your hometown wasn’t a place tourists normally visited. The main reason this town was able to survive was because a lot of the residents were wealthy, and that wealth stayed in the family and–well, the families stayed here.

“Woah,” Penelope yelped at the fourth store you stopped in, “we have to look around,” she said, eye-widening. Jack and Henry were milling about together, looking at little trinkets. You recognized the shop, it was an antique toy store–your grandfather had bought all your gifts over the years from this one in particular, some were secondhand, but they were sentimental to you and you had taken a few with you when you’d moved to America. 

“Babygirl, calm down.” Morgan laughed, following her down an aisle.

“How’s everyone settling in?” You asked, turning to Rossi when he huffed and muttered something under his breath. “What was that?” You leaned in, grinning.

Spencer pulled you back just as Rossi glared and called you a sadist. “We’re doing fine, your sister is nice.” JJ smiled, “she was asking about you,” she paused, waiting to see if it was an alright topic of conversation. When she realized you were waiting patiently for her to continue, she did, “she said she was sorry for not being home when you dropped us off. She wanted to catch up.”

You took a breath, your cheeks seemingly hot in the cold weather. “I know it’s not my place,” Will started, catching your eyes, “...but I…I think you should talk to her…”

You frowned at him, contemplating, then you nodded, sigh slipping past your lips, “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“Oh!” Penelope shouted, “Gelato, my phone says there’s a gelato place right around the corner!” 

You noticed Morgan walking up behind her when a laugh–though it sounded more like a croak–rang through your ears. “Your phone would be correct,” an old woman rounded the counter, short as could be. Her eyes bounced from face to face, settling on yours, “I told your old wench of a grandmother you’d come back. Were it for anything it’d be for him.” She sighed, “Come here, let me have a spin, my God how long has it been?”

You wanted to say eight years, but you neglected that subject and instead focussed your memory on figuring out who this woman was. 

“Hmm,” she hummed after a moment, taking a step back, her arms so incredibly bony they looked as if they might snap with the slightest pressure. Her pallor was somewhat tanned, and there were a few black spots up and down her exposed skin.

“You’re nonna’s old classmate.” It clicked, she was always stopping by the house in your earlier days, and she’d sometimes sit on the wraparound porch, sipping wine with your grandmother.

“Did you forget me already capretta*?” She chuckled as if she’d made a joke.

The rest of your group had deemed the conversation not there’s to listen in on, so they’d taken to wandering around the shop, the only one who stayed–partially because he wanted to and partially because you’d grabbed his wrist when he had tried walking away–was Spencer.

“I’m not a little girl anymore,” you murmured, “you shouldn’t call me that.”

“Oh, you’ll always be capretta* to me, you and all the others.” She smiled, her beady eyes watching you for a moment, as if expecting you to do something brash. Eventually, she said, “his funeral is tomorrow, yes?”

“Yeah,” saying it brought out a wave of pain. Your mouth felt heavy and your stomach dropped to your feet.

She nodded, “have you decided what you’re going to say?”

You shook your head, “I won’t be speaking.”

She paused, disappointment flashing across her face, “well, I’m sorry to hear that.” You pressed your lips together and began turning away, ready to get out of this uncomfortable situation, but she wasn’t finished, “you know, I’m sure he’s happy you’re here.”

Spencer watched you close your eyes, take a deep, shuddering breath, and open them carefully. He watched them gloss over and without thinking about it, snaked a hand behind your back, as if holding you to this earth would help you in some way, unbeknownst to him, it did. His touch grounded you, and you thought, another debt to be owed.

“You’re amante*,” she said right before you walked back outside.

“He’s not my–” you waved your hands but your your words faltered as she shook a cloth at you, a knowing smile adorning her face.

“Maybe not yet, capretta*.”

You sighed, yanking Spencer outside. “What did she say?” He asked as if he couldn’t use damned context clues.

“Nothing,” you responded, but Rossi raised an eyebrow, holding up his hands when you shot him a look, your eyes flashing in warning. 

The other’s finally joined you outside and you spent a few more hours acting as a tour guide. When you deemed it time to go home, you told everyone to be ready in formal attire around 8, the rest of your family would be coming in, staying at the main house as it was the last place that still had room, and a small party would ensue. Everyone only came together for weddings and funerals so they tended to make the most of it.

You weren’t really looking forward to seeing the rest of your cousins, hell you could barely face your immediate family, extended seemed a little too much too soon.

You thought about hiding up in your room, you hadn't had much time to take it in yet and you thought it might help.

Relatives started arriving around 7:30. Spencer had wandered down to your room and knocked, though you could hear the hesitation in it. “Come in,” you said, sitting up.

He walked through, shutting the door softly behind him. “So this is where I find all your secrets.” He chirped, an easy smile settling on his face as joined you on the bed, leaning back. “It’s pink,” he noted.

“Hey,” you said, “the wallpaper came with the room.”

He huffed a laugh, his eyes catching on a few blankets stacked neatly on a shelf linear your bed, “are those your baby blankets?”

“No,” you laid back down, the lamp at your side dimming slightly. “I think I stole those from my sister.”

He smiled, “I wonder what it’s like to have a sibling.”

You smiled, recalling all the idiotic fights you’d get into, how your parents would send you two to your room until you, “learned to love each other”. “She’s older by a few years,” your voice carried through the silent room, though it was lively on the first floor. You suddenly remembered you had a third, but you couldn’t recall a single memory of you being allowed there as is had always been locked.

“Do you want to talk about her?” He asked after a while.

You debated, on one hand, it might be good practice for when you spoke to her, on the other hand, what would you even say? You had no idea how she’d been these past eight years, what her life was like. What could you say and so you said, “ask me about her.”

He hummed for a moment, falling on, “why’d you steal the blankets?”

Your lips pressed together and you tried piecing together an accurate depiction of the event. “Well, she’d got them on a trip with our grandmother. My grandfather and I had been on an adventure, I think we were in the forest, I can’t remember,” you sat up and pushed yourself off the bed, walking over to the dresser and bending down to the shelf that held the blankets.

Spencer sat up, letting his eyes follow you, he felt warm, not anxious. Though his mind was working slowly, he found he didn’t mind. You seemed to calm everything down for him, it was a sense of comfort he hadn’t known he’d needed until you came into his life, and his headaches from before had slowly ceased the closer the two of you got.

“This one,” you held up, “was originally hers.” You brought it to him as he pushed himself to the edge of the bed, his feet sprawled around you. You didn’t think twice before stepping in between him, but you had never done that before and it caught him off guard. You had never been in such proximity when you were both wide awake, and you certainly had never faced each other like this.

Nevertheless, he didn’t mind–in fact, he was finding it increasingly obvious that he preferred you to be as close to him as possible. He ran a hand over the smooth ruffles of the white blanket. It was pleaded with light pink embroidery. “You should give it to your daughter.” He heard himself say, though his throat went dry right after. 

“You think so?” You found yourself wanting to be closer to him–as if I’m not close enough, you scolded yourself.

“Yeah,” he looked up at you, and gosh–it looked like he wanted you, and gosh–you felt your heartbeat speed up.

Your body moved on its own, stepping forward, loving the way his legs close together to entrap you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, dropping the blanket down beside him. You lifted your knees onto either side of his waist and sat in his lap, his arms snaking around your hips. “Hi,” you murmured, a nervous–almost hesitant–expression falling over your features.

His eyes flitted between your lips and your eyes, but he managed to force out a, “hi.”

You bit your lip and it drew his gaze instantly, you could feel his heart palpitate in his chest, almost as fast as yours. His eye fluttered close and his head fell back when you ran your hands through his hair. You didn’t know what you were doing, you told yourself multiple times, unsure of why this was happening–now of all times, oh your sweet nonno! Forgive me, you pleaded.

You angled your head forward, ready to do the one thing you’d knew your subconscious had been wanting for God knew how long, but then a knock sounded on the door and Spencer’s eyes opened once again.

“Who–” you cleared your throat, “who is it?”

“Uhm,” a nervous chuckle came from the other side of the door, “it..it’s me.” Your sister. You cursed, glanced at Spencer, then with an apologetic look, unraveled yourself from his embrace.

You walked toward the door, trying to fix your nettled clothing in the process. You took a breath and paused, then opened the door. Your sister stood there, tall, lean, and elegant, as you remembered her to be. “Hi,” she smiled, tilting her head.

You smiled back, trying your best to not give away what had just been going on–what the actual hell was just going on? You wanted to contemplate it more, wanted to ask yourself what the hell you thought you were doing–but refrained from doing so in the moment.

“Can…can I come in?”

You tensed, your eyes darting behind you and Spencer stood, throwing you an understanding glance. Your sister took a step back as he left the room, eyes following him as he disappeared somewhere down the hall. You swallowed and shifted out of the doorway, “come in.”

She raised an eyebrow but kept quiet upon you lifting a hand. 

“How have you been?” She asked once you shut the door. 

You thought about your answer, settling for, “good,” because you had been good, you had been very good, up until you got that letter.

“That’s good,” she responded, looking around the room, smiling, “you know, mom kept it just the way you had it when you left.”

You nodded, yes, you had noticed that, but you weren’t sure how you felt about it just yet.

“What’s this?” She walked toward your bed, where Spencer had been not a minute ago. She picked up the dainty blanket and sat down, steering clear of the part that had been undoubltey rumpled by Spencer. “Oh,” she said as if just recalling, “it’s the blanket I gave you.”

Your eyebrows scrunched together, you distinctly remember you stealing it from your room and hiding it when she had come asking if you’d seen it.

She laughed, apparently recalling the same thing, “I knew you had it back then,” which came as a surprise to you. She bit back a smile as she began folding it again, “nonna told me to let you keep it.”

Your eyes widened slightly, “did she?”

“Yep,” your sister popped the ‘p’.

“Hmm,” you hummed.

“What?” She asked, setting the blanket aside.

“She’s become batty.”

Your sister’s eyebrows rose, “how do you mean?”

“She’s been nothing but brutal to me,” you frowned, crossing your arms.

Your sister’s eye crinkled like she was about to laugh, “wow,” she said instead, “you’ve been gone so long you must have forgotten.”

“Forgotten what?” You scoffed.

“That’s how she’s always been,” your sister shook her head, mumbling your name and something else incoherent before turning to look back up at you, “I hope you visit again, that this isn’t some one off thing.”

You pulled away, your walls instantly going back up and your sister sighed, clearly noting the mask of an expression. “You always did that when you were a kid, you know.”

“Did what?” You furrowed your brows.

“Fold into yourself,” she waved her hands, “I don’t know how else to explain it.” She huffed, “you know, we really miss you, everyone. My kids,” she started, tears thrreatening to break loose, “you nieces and nephews–they don’t even know you.”

You looked down and for a second you weren’t sure what she was talking about, but then you remembered that yes–you were a zia*, your sister had children, three of them, and you hadn’t met them once.

Guilt wrapped itself around you like a veil, “I’m sorry,” you heard yourself saying, your face contorting as if you wanted to cry, wanted to express how remorseful you felt, but didn’t know how to.

“You’re just like her,” she threw her head back as a few tears ran down her cheek, “I think that’s why you were closer to Nonno*. You and Nonna* are too alike, you’re both so damn stubborn.” She huffed a laugh and for a moment, a sliver of a smile tugged at the corner of your lips.

“I think love my best friend,” you found yourself admitting, maybe it was your way of trying to reach out, to tell your sister you were still you.

“That guy that was just here?” She grinned at you, “yeah, the family has been talking about it, Nonna* said to expect a wedding within the next year.”

Your face fell, embarrassment taking over, “what? Why? That old bat!” You scoffed, standing, “I can’t believe her, I’ve only been here–what? Two days? If that? That crazy old woman,” you marched toward the door, “Well?” You called to your sister, “are you going to back me up or what?”

She stared at you for a moment and then slowly, but surely, an calm smile crept onto her face, but her eyes were ones of storybook villains,“yeah, sure.”

The day started gloomy, though when you met Spencer in the hall, it became just a little less than that. You weren’t feeling like yourself, though you weren’t actually sure what self you were referring to. 

JJ had messaged the group chat that she’d be late because Henry had an accident right before they set off to leave. You thought about messaging your sister, but it felt weird, you weren’t used to initiating conversation with your family, so you didn’t, although you did plan to speak before the funeral.

You wore simple black attire, as did everyone else and you caught yourself holding onto Spencer’s hand tighter than usual, almost as if he’d leave you too, and you couldn’t have that. Your heart studded in your chest once you saw the coffin, it was closed, of course. It had been open for the hearing, but that had occured before you’d landed.

You couldn’t move forward. You told the others to go on and after making sure you were okay, they did, “but you’re not allowed to go,” you’d whispered, almost to yourself.

Spencer had squeezed your hand, whispering back, “I’m not going anywhere.”

Your family gathered around the casket and the sacerdote* stepped forward, reading off a few of the retellings your grandmother had no doubt written down with the help of your parents. You noted a few other, non-related spectators, probably friends.

A few of his favorite songs were played and then your mother said a few words, followed by your grandmother, and finally your sister. “Are you okay?” Spencer pulled you closer by your arm.

You pressed your lips together, watching the coffin being lowered into the grave. “I don’t know…” and when you swallowed, you found your throat dry and for the first time since the letter, you not only found yourself wanting to cry, you found it was almost within reach.

The ceremony ended and relatives began dropping dirt into the grave, you thought to say one last prayer before leaving, but you didn’t want anyone to see you. You turned to Spencer and let go of his hand, “I just…” you turned away, pressing your lips together as you eyed the fresh grave.

He smiled sadly, but he nodded; he always seemed to be able to understand you no matter how silent or how loud you were. Maybe that’s why you loved him, you couldn’t be sure. There were so many things you loved about him–gosh you loved him. The revelation was like a wish from a birthday candle being answered.

You stepped away and Spencer watched as you pushed through the crowd. Hotch and the others surrounded him, questioning stares ever-present. “We should give her some time,” he said after seeing you hesitate, then sit near the makeshift headstone.

“What’s she doing?” Penelope frowned, watching you shift in your spot on the wet grass.

“Saying goodbye,” Spencer was the only one to respond–he was also the last one to retreat.

You didn’t know how to begin, you hadn’t spoken to him in eight years. You were scared that he was angry at you, but then again, you knew that couldn’t be the case, yes you knew he was gone, but what if his spirit was still here? What if he couldn’t move on because he had unfinished business and it was your fault?

You stopped yourself, since when did you believe in superstition? That was your parents…and Rossi; not you.

You sighed, running your hand through the grass, deciding to start as if he were still there, trying not to sound too guilty.

Nonno, you began, I–I’m sorry, you shook your head, I know, I know I should have visited. I know– a single tear fell down your cheek and you paused to wipe it away, shocked by your own emotions. “Forgive me,” you whispered.

“You sound like a crazy person,” you jerked your head to the side, eyes landing on your grandmother.

You huffed, eyes narrowing as you sniffled and wiped another tear that had fallen. “You’re one to talk.”

Your grandmother shifted, as if uncomfortable, and then she moved forward, more brittle than you had noticed the first time. “I’m not going to sit down,” she said after a moment, “don’t let my looks full you, I’m not how I once was.” She grunted as she stood beside you.

“Yeah, well, your looks aren’t fooling anyone, so.”

“Ouch,” she laughed, but it sounded like a wenches cackle. “Oh nipotina*,” she clicked her tongue and shook her head, a complacent smile making its way onto her wrinkled face.

You sat in silence, comfortable or not, you were glad she had stopped talking, you didn’t know what to say to her. In your opinion, you had never really gotten along with your grandmother, this wasn’t reconnecting with your parents or sisters or even your zia* and zio*, this was…new territory altogether.

You frowned, “listen, child,” and you did, you perked up, you could listen to her talk, that would be easy, you just hoped she didn't expect a response. “Your grandfather loved you, he never stopped talking about you.” You smiled, but then it faltered. You had abandoned him, hadn’t even deigned to visit because of how guilty you’d felt…

“He knew,” you whispered, heart racing. 

You heard your grandmother sigh. “I thought as much,” she frowned, staring at her husband's grave as if she could bring him back by will alone. 

“You did?” You hadn’t left without saying goodbye, not to him at least, that was one thing everyone had gotten wrong, your grandmother knowing had never occurred to you because you were sure your grandfather kept it a secret. Why else would the entire family have blown up when they’d realized you had left? When they’d realized it was too late to stop or convince you otherwise–because by the time everyone else had found out, you were halfway across the North Atlantic already.

“I always thought it was strange how he never said anything about it.” A grim smile tugged her at her red-painted lips.

“Nonna*, did I make the right decision?” You asked, surprising even yourself.

She sighed and you thought she might say ‘I can’t tell you if it was right or wrong’ or something a normal grandmother would say, but your grandmother wasn’t normal, she was an old bat, probably the same one you’d turn into at her age and she said, “You’re damned right you were wrong.”

Your mouth dropped, taken aback, and then you burst into laughter, throwing your head back as you tried wiping your tears, “oh you’re such an old bat,” you sighed.

“I knew you always called me that behind my back,” she harumphed, jerking her head away and crossing her arms like a child.

“Oh come now, Nonna*,” you stood and reached out the touch her shoulder.

She huffed and dropped her arms, eyes darting around your face in what seemed to be concern. “You were wrong for not telling the rest of us, you had your parents worried sick, and your sister too.” Her frown deepened, “even me.”

You nodded, “I know, but nonna*,” you sighed, wanting to explain yourself, but she held up a hand. You raised a brow, almost saying huh, so that’s where I get it from, out loud.

“Your grandfather always said you were meant for something greater, that your heart wouldn’t allow you to stay in this town the way ours allowed the rest of us.

“No, no nipotina*, you were not wrong for leaving. This town, this family? Yes, you come from here, but there,” she nodded her head toward your co-workers, (or friends, you were honestly still deciding), “with them, that is where you belong now.”

You smiled, finding acceptance in her answer.

“And your friend,” she rolled her eyes when she said it, “well, I expect the wedding to be here.”

You huffed a laugh before turning, catching Specner’s eye, and when he waved your heart swelled. “We’ll see,” you started walking away.

Your grandmother trailed after you, throwing her hands up and shouting, “incovalato*! You insolent child!”

a/n: ahhh i can't wait to write my next fic because i already know waht it is. i don't want to give spoilers, but just know you're going to see dad!spencer !!

@darkmatilda @theylovemelody

[amirasainz]

Hi literally get so excited when you update! Can you write one where charles x alexandra x reader where charles and alex are away for an event and forget that it's the reader birthday ans only remember when someone tells them birthday it and they try and make it up to her.

Hi loves. I hope you enjoy this little piece. Let me know what you think. Comments are always apreciated!I'm sorry,but the Sydney Sweeny picture was perfect, so I had to include it😉

Also, question (and please answer me that in the comments), does anyone read what I write before the story? Like the little message here? I'm just curious❤️

Enjoy reading and send me requests!!❤️

-XoXo

The Birthday disaster

You couldn’t believe it. They weren’t here. They didn’t call, text, or even send you a freaking letter. Your own boyfriend and girlfriend forgot your birthday. And not just any birthday, it was your 21 birthday. Instead of celebrating with Alex, Charles, and all of your friends in a vibrant club, you were sitting on the balcony of your apartment. Despite the cold wind hitting your bare skin mercilessly, thanks to the cute short dress you wore today, you couldn’t bring yourself to walk back inside.

Of course, your friends tried to get you to come out with them to celebrate your birthday properly. But it just hurt too much, and to be honest, your mind was too tired and sad for any kind of festivity.

When Charles and Alex first informed you about the event hosted by one of Alex’s friends, they eagerly asked you to join them. Unfortunately, your job didn’t allow you to tag along, which both of them understood. However, they promised you that they would return today at around 5 o’clock. To be honest, you thought they had something special planned for your birthday. But last night, at around 11 pm, you received a text from Alex, informing you that they would be staying longer in Venice, where the event was held.

At first, you thought this was some kind of joke. Maybe they wanted you to think that they weren’t able to celebrate with you, only to surprise you with a birthday party. But sadly, when you woke up this morning, nothing happened. Throughout the day, there was complete silence between you and them.

Your group of friends, who had been with you a few hours ago to at least celebrate your birthday a little bit, tried to convince you to go out and party with them. Before you could agree, you got a notification from Instagram. You were tagged quite often in a post showing Alex and Charles at the event. They looked so happy and carefree, making you feel even more numb.

Despite their best efforts, your friends left after half an hour, after you reassured them with phrases like “Yes, I will take care of myself,” “Yes, I will call you if I need anything,” and “No, you don’t have to worry about me. I’m completely fine.” They knew you were anything but fine; however, they also knew that you needed to be alone right now.

So here you are, sitting alone in the cold with your only companions being the vodka bottle you brought with you and the relentless wind hitting your skin. “Happy fucking 21st birthday to me, I guess,” you muttered to yourself, staring out at the sea.

“Oh my god, Lisa. You truly outdid yourself,” complimented Alex, her friend. And it was true. The event was filled with beautiful flowers and lights, giving the room a fairy-like appearance. The soft glow of the lights reflected off the petals, creating a magical ambiance that made everyone feel like they had stepped into an enchanted garden. Charles, who stood next to his girlfriend, only brought her closer to him and said, “Yeah, I have to agree. I’m 100% sure YN would have loved it.” “You are so right, love. I wish she was here with us,” agreed Alex, her voice tinged with a hint of sadness.

“Wait, I’m confused. So there is nothing wrong between you guys and YN?” asked Lisa, her brow furrowed in confusion. Alex and Charles shared a look with each other, both of them equally puzzled. “No, why would there be anything wrong with us?” Alex replied, her tone defensive. “Oh, I just thought you had a fight and this is the reason why you are here and not with YN today. But I must have been wrong…” Linda’s voice trailed off, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment. She shared a look with her partner Mary, both of them realizing the gravity of the situation.

“Wait, stop. Pause. Why would we be with YN tonight? You invited us to your event and we are here. I don’t get what’s going on right now,” said Alex, her frustration mounting. It felt like Mary and Lisa knew something she and Charles didn’t. Mary, who was now also becoming more annoyed with how the two of them acted before them, didn’t take any nonsense from Alex.

Without hesitation, she looked straight into Alex’s eyes and told her with an ice-cold voice, “Well, we weren’t expecting you to show up today because we thought that you would be busy celebrating YN’s 21 birthday today. But from the looks of it, it seems like you forgot your own girlfriend’s birthday. So don’t talk to us with that rude tone of yours. At least we remember each other’s birthdays.” With that, Mary took Lisa by the hand and left, leaving Alex and Charles standing there in stunned silence.

Alex and Charles were left behind, both staring at the space where the couple used to be a few seconds ago. Both of them felt a wave of guilt and shame wash over them. How could they forget their own girlfriend’s birthday? Turning on their phones, they saw the flood of messages they had received from not only their fans but also their friends, YN’s friends, and their families. Each message was a painful reminder of their oversight.

“We messed up so badly,” muttered Charles, looking at Alex with a pained expression. The woman could only nod, still speechless. Charles took her arm and gently but firmly led her out of the room. “We have to go to her. ASAP,” Alex told Charles, who was already a step ahead of her and had their jackets in hand. With that, the couple left the event, both feeling a deep sense of remorse. How could they forget their girl’s birthday?

As they hurried to their car, Alex’s mind raced with thoughts of how to make it up to YN. She knew it would take more than just an apology to mend the hurt they had caused. Charles, too, was lost in his thoughts, thinking of ways to show YN how much she meant to them. They both knew that they had a lot of making up to do, but they were determined to do whatever it took to make things right.

At around 1 am, the couple finally arrived home. The ride back had been silent, the air in the car feeling oppressively thick, making it hard to breathe. They parked their car in the garage and, without hesitation, jumped out of the vehicle, racing towards the elevator. The few minutes it took to reach their front door felt like an eternity, each second stretching painfully.

When they entered the apartment, everything was shrouded in darkness. A figure sat on the balcony, barely visible in the dim light. Charles immediately sat next to YN, while Alex kneeled in front of her. YN didn’t even look at them before taking a gulp from the nearly empty bottle of vodka. “Hey love, I think you’ve had enough for tonight,” whispered Charles, gently trying to take the bottle away from the now 21-year-old girl.

YN shook her head, her voice trembling as she reminded them, “No. NO, you do not get to tell me what I can and cannot do. Not after you forgot about me.” “Baby, we didn’t forget about you,” Alex tried, her eyes already filling with tears. YN only laughed, her own tears streaming down her face. “No, Alexandra. You do not get to tell me that after you forgot my birthday, and you certainly don’t get to cry.” “Ok, let’s all calm down,” Charles attempted again, his voice soothing but firm.

“No Charles! I don’t want to calm down. You both forgot about me. You two promised me that something like this would never happen to us. You promised me that you would always love me. You promised me that the age gap didn’t bother you when we started dating when I was 19. But look at us. You already broke one of your promises. How can I be sure that you won’t break another one?” With that, YN broke down in tears. Her whole body shook with the force of her sobs, her head held in her hands.

Charles and Alex immediately moved to comfort her. “YN, breath. We are so freaking sorry. I guarantee you, we didn’t mean for something like this to happen. We were all so busy with our jobs and social lives that we didn’t mean to forget something so important,” Charles began, his voice filled with regret.

Alex took YN’s head into her hands, gently wiping away her tears. “We love you more than anything in this world. You are our air and our heart. And we will apologize for the rest of our lives if we have to,” she said, her voice breaking with emotion. YN only whispered, “I love you guys too.” Alex didn't hesitate before kissing her girlfriend. after a moment the they pulled apart.

Charles turned her face towards him, speaking softly, “And we didn’t lie when we told you the age gap didn’t bother us. And we certainly didn’t lie when we promised you that we would always love you, ok?” After YN nodded, Letting Charles also kiss her. This kiss was filled with as much love as Alex, just a bit more urgently but still gentle. After their kiss, the three of them cuddled close to each other, finding solace in their shared warmth.

It would take some time before everything was alright between the three of them again. But for now, sitting together and watching the city lights flicker in the distance was the perfect way to start healing.

[anashins]

So this just happened to me but I found out my bf doesn’t have my contacts saved with any kind of emoji or cute nickname. Maybe a suggestion for a Drabble? Feel like a child writing this but idk how this has me so bummed and sad

Pairing: Jaehyun x You

Genre: fluff, romance

Word Count: 1.1k

Summary: As you find out that Jaehyun doesn't have your contact saved on his phone under a cute nick name, you start comparing your relationship to others. After all, that must mean you're not special to him - right?

A/N: I hope everything went well for you, dear! My bf always says, “I don’t know, you have to tell me!” - so just tell him! Because men are simple but their partners' feelings matter to them, even if they seem childish to you 💞

“Under which name did your boyfriend save you on his phone? You know that?”

You looked at your best friend who tilted her head as though in deep thoughts. For a moment, you hoped she wouldn’t know, wouldn’t care, and that you were overdramatic after all like you had feared all along, but almost instantly, she replied,

“When we started dating, he had me saved as ‘my girl’ without any kind of emoji. When we officially decided to get together, he saved my contact as ‘baby’ with a pink heart, and it remained like this until now.”

Your best friend wasn’t the first one who you had asked and whose answer was almost identical to your other taken friends you had questioned about this topic: Their boyfriends all had them saved on their phones with either a cute nickname, some meaningful emoji or both.

Your own boyfriend had you saved on his phone under your government name. 

You usually never looked at his screen as there were always so many things going on with different people from his group, from his management and from people in the industry in general, so it was always buzzing anyway. 

But when a week ago you had been lying next to him, sending him pictures from the activity you had done together shortly before, your name popped up in his chat history.

Your full name.

You had been bummed, and he had happily continued on as if he hadn’t minded you seeing this, as if this was the most normal thing in the world and didn’t make you feel less special among all his other contacts - and there were a lot for an idol.

After all, even when you didn’t have as many connections as him, you had your boyfriend saved as,

‘Yuno-ya’ with a pink heart.

It wasn’t the most romantic nickname as you weren’t calling each other pet names at all, but still cute and emphasized his contact to filter his name out of all other people.

Now, hearing all the other boyfriends having your female friends saved as something special, it made you feel even sadder as if the entire thing hadn’t been bothering you for a week already. 

“Under which name has your boyfriend your contact saved on his phone?” your best friend questioned back.

You sighed out loud.

-

“I don’t like it when you make that face,” Jaehyun immediately said to you instead of a greeting when you came over to his house later that day. “And you have randomly started making it the last time we met. I’ve been worrying all week, but on the phone you always say everything is fine when it’s clearly not. Tell me now, did I do something wrong?”

You bit into your bottom lip. You felt that now was the chance, now or never before it would eat you up from the inside and you would never be able to let go of it. “Under which name do you have me saved on your phone?”

Jaehyun widened his eyes, completely blindsided by this unexpected silly question, apparently. “Pardon?”

“My contact,” you described it better for him. “Under which name can you find me in your contacts?”

He confusedly proceeded to speak out your full government name.

“Exactly!” you called him out.

“I don’t understand.”

“You have me saved in your contacts under my full name!”

“Well… isn’t that your full name? Under what name should I save you then? Should I make one up or…” He shook his head. “I don’t know what’s going on! What’s the problem here?”

You folded your arms in front of your chest. The longer you went on to explain this situation to a very oblivious Jaehyun, the sillier you started to feel. Were you exaggerating? But none of your friends had said so and claimed your feelings were valid.

Suddenly, your voice was very low when you poured out your feelings to him as there was no turning back anymore. “My friend’s boyfriends have them all saved on their phones under some cute nickname. Or with a cute emoji at least. I also have you saved as Yuno-ya with a heart. It makes the other person feel special and makes the contact stand out from everyone else. It gives you a little surge of excitement whenever that person’s name pops up. As you have me saved with my full government name… it makes me think if you see me as everyone else and I’m not that special to you.”

Your breakout followed a few moments of silence in which you kept your gaze locked to the ground as you were now kind of too embarrassed to face Jaehyun. Hearing these words… you felt so childish.

The pat you felt on the top of your head only shortly later convinced you of the opposite though. When you lifted your head, Jaehyun wasn’t laughing and he didn’t look like he wanted to make fun of you or didn’t understand your feelings at all.

“I’m sorry,” he said with genuine concern. “I�� didn’t know. I have everyone saved on my phone with their full government name as there are just so many people that it really gives me a hard time to separate them all or even remember who they are. Even the members aren’t an exception, only my parents. It was just a habit I followed when we exchanged contacts and I was never bothered enough to change it. If I had known it was this important to you, I would have done it right away.”

Was it really this simple? Some men like your boyfriend just didn’t know, were totally unaware of such things and you simply needed to tell them to change whatever bothered you, no matter how silly and childish it might sound?

He was a perfect partner for you and you couldn’t believe you let such a futile thing question his feelings for an entire week.

Jaehyun smiled at you and pulled out his phone. “Don’t ever think again that you’re not special to me and I never feel excitement rushing through me whenever your name pops up on my phone. Your chat is pinned at the very top and your number saved as favorites. Among everyone I regularly keep in contact with, even if I don’t answer for hours, I always answer you first. I always recognize your picture, no matter how many times you change it. Upon first glance, I always recognize it’s you. My beautiful girl.”

He gave you a kiss on the cheek and then proceeded to type something into his phone with a wide grin, obviously changing your name name.

“What did you save my contact under now?” you asked and wanted to catch a glimpse, but Jaehyun quickly pulled his phone away from you.

“Text me now and you’ll see.”

[bruhstation]

steam team's seniors during their baby years

A friend group so weird and toxic to people they dislike it could rival It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia’s. They're not immune to the "I came to Sodor to avoid my problems and wanted a fresh start" trope many Sudrians also follow

Edward Pettigrew

Age: 31 as of 1984

A kind, friendly NWR railwayman who didn’t mind a lot of things and was popular amongst younger folks for his looks and demeanor. He likes showing newbies the ropes of the NWR and Sodor as a whole because he just loves infodumping. Despite being made fun of by some railwaymen for his “weirdness”, Edward worked hard and was known as the jack-of-all-trades by his peers, usually treating younger and newer railwaymen to drinks after work to get them accustomed to Sodor (he did this to Henry, then Gordon, then James). Originally from the village of Pezë in Tirana, Albania, 1940s. Due to his beginnings in a small rural village and the Albanian government’s censorship of outside influences and heavy restriction of traveling outside the country, Edward’s hunger for knowledge about the world grew more and more. His family had connections to the Lëvizja Nacional-Çlirimtare and Edward’s particularly bright and good at talking, so he became a diplomat to travel outside Albania – a step into his plans of learning more about the world. After landing himself in the United Kingdom and studying everything he wanted, he believes it’s still not enough. He found out about an island infamous for its supernatural occurrences and cases of people missing just off the coast of the UK – Sodor. Being the curious man he is, he discarded everything that’s needed for the LNÇ to locate him and landed on Sodor, gorging himself with every mystery the island has to offer. Impulsive? Yes. But for the first time, Edward felt true freedom. However, Edward got too curious and nosy and became a casualty in an accident fueled by supernatural hysteria related to Lady of the Legend and was transported around 40 years into the future, landing in 1983 with his memories all over the place. Despite losing his sense of self and having no idea what he is, his thirst for knowledge still lives on inside his head. His cheerfulness, amicability, and kindness are extensions he formed to make up for the hole inside his heart. Edward does love his friends, but he believes that if he can withhold information from them and make them all live in blissful ignorance, they can be truly happy – this all stems from his fear of exceeding his limits and being discarded (which he later copes by being a typical wise friendly old man in 1999). He often sees visages of Lady in his dreams.

Gordon J. Gresley

Age: 26 as of 1984

Joined after Henry. Looked like he was fresh out of a funeral. A young hotshot who was more polite, quiet, and reserved compared to his 1999 counterpart. Gordon started out as an apprentice fireman for the Wild Nor’Wester’s previous driver. He treated his arrival on Sodor as a desperate last resort to escape his issues and grief and pitifully believed he was “lumped with the social pariahs in the boonies”, but he’s gotten better and believed that this is where he can truly outshine everyone, much to the annoyance and chagrin of his seniors. Gordon acts like he knows what he’s doing in order to build up his image as someone who’s dependable and strong and revels in small basks of limelight. However, he was constantly uncomfortable with how Edward treated accidents as normal due to their survivors being in tip-top shape the next day and how Henry is so distrustful of and odd about everything and everyone and sweats 24/7, but he’s been masking and convincing himself that he’s not like the rest of them. He’s normal. He’s normal! Let’s all hold hands. Don’t be fooled by his sad face. Young Gordon can be arrogant and think he knows everything for being a youngin.

Henry Stanier

Age: 27 as of 1984

Joined after Edward, so he’s quite close to him. Gordon’s “senior” by 6 months. He’s always, ALWAYS scared endlessly about anything “out of the ordinary” and beats himself up over it, much to his own disgust. Henry had a deep rooted hatred and jealousy towards his peers for pitying him after a coworker revealed to other railwaymen that he’s narcoleptic without his permission. He’s been masking his disabilities despite it being detrimental for his well-being, but as long as people treated him “normally”, Henry would endure (dreadfully). He did this especially with Gordon, the newest addition to the Northwestern Railway at the time, because he didn’t want anyone else to treat him differently when they find out about his health issues. As an extention, Henry developed a vitriol towards Gordon too – he’s particularly jealous about how he’s so “ungrateful” of everything’s given to him like his fair looks, clothes, and position as the to-be face of the Wild Nor’Wester. They did become friends though despite the process not being easy. It’s okay. They became besties that were mean to old nosy folks. Initially wanted to pursue arts, but due to circumstances from his past related to his health and paranoia fueled by his past failures and “jinxes”, he came to Sodor as a half-hearted last resort to get a job. He wasn’t hopeful of having anyone respect him for who he is, but things do get better, much to his surprise.

James A. Hughes

Age: 25 as of 1989

Joined the NWR 5 years after Edward did. At that point, Gordon already discarded his GNR Green look and went for the blue attire (minus the big coat). Flaunts his beauty almost at any given time, especially when someone mildly complimented him. He’s more of a nerd (word used loosely because he acts like a know-it-all when he actually has no idea what he’s doing) compared to his canon, 1999 counterpart. James came to Sodor for a fresh start and believed he deserves more than what he’s given. He thinks he’s so tough and hard as nails – in fact it became his source of hubris because he gets into accidents and was scolded by his seniors for being so vain and stubborn. He doesn’t want to get dirty, he doesn’t want to shovel coal, he doesn’t want to get wet from the washdown suds – he only wants the good out of the work and doesn’t want to accept the “bad” sides as well, so James was branded as the “problem kid” of the NWR by older folks. James, who can’t handle harsh criticism and labels well, grow even more distant with them. He primarily hangs out with the RWS trio because they seem to understand his situation and the feeling of being “outcasted” (despite Gordon’s annoyance at his boastfulness). 

[planetpedri]

Hello I've been reading your work and it was AMAZING. And I would like to request a Pablo Gavi x reader where they are friends with benefits and the reader falls for Pablo and one day when the reader start to gain her confidence about confessing her felling for Pablo but only she found out that he date your best friend.

*idk if your comfortable or not but thank you, your choice if you want to end it happy or sad AHHA🧚

Casual — Pablo Gavi.

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Fem!Reader

Summary: After half a year of casual hook ups with one of your closest friends, you realize what you felt for him was far beyond casual and you couldn’t hold it in any longer. Your world comes crashing down on you the day you decide to finally tell him, because now he’s asking your permission to ask our your best friend.

Word count: 821

Disclaimer/s: no actual smut!! slight mention of hook ups but nothing more, angst aswell! part two

A/N: Idk if I did this justice but!!🫶🏻

You sat on the comfort of your friend, Pablo’s couch. Patiently tapping your index finger against your right bicep, which you’d been clutching ever so tightly. He’d told you to wait there while he finished getting dressed. You didn’t know why he was in such a hurry today, he’d hardly finished saying ‘hello’ before he was rushing back to his room.

Your eyes wandered around the large living room, far too spacious for your liking although you’d gotten used to it throughout the years of friendship and group hangouts that took place in this very room.

White walls with white furniture, black decorations, the occasional blue. It was bland. He was definitely a man. You smile at that, how simplistic he was, he always had been.

Your mind fills with memories of the two of you alone, stumbling over the carpet till you landed on the couch, too lost in each other to bother making it to the bedroom.

Shaking the thoughts from your head, you notice the light pattering of feet making their way in your direction. You don’t bother turning around, already knowing who it was.

“I’m glad you came, I needed to ask you something.” Pablo smiles boyishly, plopping onto the couch a few feet from you.

Your heart leaps in your chest at the endless possibilities that question could mean, none of which were correct in the end.

A small, subconscious grin makes its way onto your face, “Oh? Then I insist you go first!”

Pablo runs a hand through his light brown hair, something you’d grown to adore. “So, Lucia..”

Your grin falters, “what?” You choke out, caught off guard by the mention of your best friend.

“Yeah, we’ve been talking.” His smile widens while he speaks, pure happiness evident in his voice. “I was wondering, and I know this is an awkward situation, considering..” He motions between the two of you, making your stomach drop. Oh God no. “I wanted to see if you were okay with me asking her out.”

Lucia. The perfect blonde haired blue eyes beauty. Your best girl friend. The one person you knew you should’ve told about your’s and Pablo’s.. situation. Maybe if you’d just told her, you could’ve avoided all this. Why hadn’t she told you about them?

But you didn’t. And now you were facing the consequences.

He says your name, trailing off at the end of it, “Well?”

Blinking once, twice, thrice, you swallow. Hard. Fighting the bile rising in your throat. “Don’t you think that i’d be.. I dunno.. Weird? With what we’ve been doing?”

Waving your concerns away, the brunette shrugs. “But it was just a casual thing, no? Why would that matter?”

Idiot.

You only ever wanted him to be happy of course, so why was this such a hard pill to swallow? This would make him happy, therefore you would be.

Then you realize, you wanted him to be happy.. but with you. You wanted him to be happy as long as he was happy with you.

“Sure.” You utter. There was no use fighting the inevitable. “You’re right. It was casual.”

Saying that word. Casual. It felt like knife pressed to a barely healed wound. It’s every essence, it’s every meaning, left an acidic taste on your tongue.

Pablo wasn’t stupid, or, that stupid. He caught the moment your demeanor shifted, so suddenly, so drastically, how could he have not noticed it?

Confusion flashes across his face, “why did you say it like that?”

“Like what?” You fight a scoff, your eyes flickering to the side, refusing to meet his harsh stare.

“Like you’re not telling me the truth?” He furrows his eyebrows, his eyes boring holes into your head.

Walls build on your face, stoning him off from reading into it anymore. “I just—“ You lick your lips, “this whole time we were fucking you had a thing for my best friend? Do you not see why that would make me a little fucking bitter?”

Now he was just baffled. “You knew it meant nothing! Didn’t you?” He sounded a lot harsher than intended, but he genuinely meant it. You had to have known that, right?

Standing abruptly, you nod. “No, yeah, I did. Whatever. Ask her out, I don’t care.” But the way your voice wavered gave you away instantly.

Pablo went to stand as well, but you stop him with a glare. “She like’s tulips, yellow ones specifically. And she’s a sucker for walks on the beach, and big acts of affection. Don’t screw things up, she doesn’t deserve that. And you have a knack for ruining good things.” You add the last part out of spite. A final dig, the final word.

Turning on your heels, you make a bee line for the front door. Ignoring the way he called out your name, ignoring the way he cursed, ignoring the way you felt tears pooling in your eyes.

(DTS) @halfwayhearted ^_^ and to whoever requested this, sorry I lowkey gave up at the end… lmk if u want a part 2 i suppose!

[sunrisesfromthewest]

First Encounter Part 8

Warnings/Summary:Slight Angst|Armando flipping the switch all the sudden|Everybody ready to whoop his ass|Y/N and Rita having much needed girl talk| Mando reflecting on his assassin days |Y/N making him work for it if you get what I mean😌

Previous Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Receiving an amused expressions from the group and a stressed out one from Mike, you attempt to shut down your fathers' comments. 

“Dad for the last time I’m not pregnant....and plus it doesn’t work that fast!" you exclaimed crossing your arms annoyed that he keeps trying to speak a child on you. 

Pursing his lips in disagreement your dad, sends Mike a look, "She's in denial but don’t worry Mike, this is your chance to get reconnected with your son and future grandchild.” 

Closing his eyes Mike lets out a frustrated sigh, "Marcus, I don’t need to be thinking about a nonexistent grandkid when I’m still trying to get used to having a son and a wife!"  

Shaking his head, he looks at Armando who has been silently listening to the conversation, mind seemingly lost on the possibility of bringing a child in this world. 

“No Mike this...” pausing Marcus gasps loudly in realization, which startled everybody, "THE VISION! OH, how could I be so stupid.” Without any explanation Marcus walks away mind now occupied with this new spiritual hint he has received. 

“Okay...should we go ahead and head towards the location.” Kelly says bringing the conversation back to the mission. 

“Yeah, there should be a safe house not too far from the meet up spot, lets gather what we can and load up." Mike replied to Kelly with an exhausted tone. 

With that everyone proceeds to make their way to the lake house, except for Mike who ask if Armando could stay behind for a second. 

Hearing this you glance at Armando who has a contemplating look on his face, sighing he gives your hand a small squeeze, and makes his way back to his father. 

Sending Mike a smile you continue walking with the others, allowing them to have a private moment. 

Reluctantly Armando brings his gaze to his father, "Did you need something?” 

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

While everyone collects things for the mission you go through your medical bag, double checking your supplies as Midnight lays on your lap sleep. 

“Hey,Y/N I meant to ask you to check out Rita, she got into a scuffle with Lockwood before we had reached them." Kelly says while zipping up a duffel bag. Glancing up at the mention of her name, Rita shakes her head in disagreement, "I’m fine, we should save the supplies for when it’s needed.” 

Standing up you lay Midnight by your bag, as you make your way over to Rita with concern, "I got plenty of supplies and you should let me determine if your fine or not.” 

Sighing she says, "You're not going to leave me alone, until you check me out aren’t you." Running your eyes over her, you let out a small laugh, as you reach her tense form, "You know me so well. Are you hurting anywhere?” 

“Leaving the elevator, it was hurting at first but the pain is dull now." she says pointing to her head, while glaring at Lockwood. Pressing your hands down softly on her head, you asked if she felt any pain, while you palpate and look for any bruises. 

“No, mostly mentally hurt than physical." she says removing your hand from her head, looking up she gives you a sad but reassuring smile.  

Leaning down near her ear you asked her if she wanted you to prescribe her some “Medical” Hemp, on the low. She turns to you with an amused expression, "Are you trying to sell a police officer weed?” 

Raising your hand up, in defense, you say with a smile,” Hey, you said it, I’m just trying to help a friend relax and take her mind off of a useless asshole.” Walking over to your bag, you glare at Lockwood, who glares back at you. 

“Some men just don’t deserve a woman's love, especially from a caring woman like you Rita." you say still glaring at Lockwood as you rummaging through your medical bag, for some ibuprofen.  

Lockwood looks like he wanted to reply but with the duct tape over his mouth and hands   handcuffed behind him all he could, do was roll his eyes and huff noisily through his nose. Giving Rita the pills she takes it nodding her head at your words, but making a skeptical expression, while looking down at the pills in her hands. 

” Take them pills Rita, ain’t nobody tryna slip you some weed." you said watching with a big smile as she debates about taking the medicine or not. Rolling her eyes, she takes them while glaring at you playful, "If you gave me some weed Y/N, I swear...”  

Cutting her off you say, "Girl that was pain medicine, you weren’t hiding your flinching very well, when I was examining your head for any swelling.” 

Shaking her head at your words, she points at you with a knowing look, "Can't get nothing past you, Huh?”  

“You already know, you want me to get you some water.” you said heading to the kitchen. Hearing a ‘please’ you make your way to the fridge, smacking Dorn shoulder playful, while passing by him. 

Unbeknownst to you Mike enters the house with a solemn expression, while Armando trails behind him, eyes narrowed as he traced the room for you. 

Moving around Mike, he heads further into the house, briefly looking in the living room before turning his head towards the kitchen, where he sees you grabbing some water. 

Sighing he walks over to you almost hesitant, as he watches you glance away from the fridge. 

Seeing Armando approaching form you smile, but it immediately drops when he doesn’t return it with a playful smirk. Concerned you close the fridge door, setting the water on the counter as you walk towards him. 

“Hey...is everything okay?" you said blinking up at him as he looks everywhere but at your worried expression. After not receiving a response, you grab his hand bringing him further into the kitchen, so you can talk to him without any curious eyes watching y’all. 

Feeling him snatch his rough hand out of your soft ones made you turn to him with raised and curved brows. 

“Mand-” before you can question him, he cuts you off, "Don't call me that,Y/N!”  Even more confused you try to reach out to him, but he just steps away from your comforting hands, while frowning at you. 

Defense immediately coming up, you pull your hands back opting to wrap it around yourself as you look at him completely lost on why he was acting like this all the sudden. 

“Mando....baby what’s wrong.... did I do something?" you said chewing at your bottom lip nervously as you wait for his response. 

Brown eyes glancing down at your lips, he shakes his head eyes flickering back up to yours while he lets out a frustrated sigh, "No... I did...whatever was blossoming between us, it stops here.” 

Letting out a stunned laugh you say “What?” fully hearing him but lost by this random change of heart. 

“You heard me, Y/N.....and plus this was just a one-time thing, like you said.... Shit we both just needed to scratch an itch.” he says watching as you wince at his words, while avoiding his gaze. 

Blinking your tears away you laugh bitterly, "Wow, after all that defending I did for myself...and you... is that what you thought this was.... the need to scratch and itch!” you said with a clenched jaw while glaring up at him. 

Pursing his lips Armando goes to speak but you cut him off, "You know what Fuck You Armando! and to think I was starting to have a change of heart about you......I should’ve listened to Kelly!” 

“Yeah, you should’ve and you already did the first part!" Armando says as he watches your face flush with anger. 

Shaking your head in disbelief and hurt you shove pass him hard, as you make your way to the restroom, not wanting to face the embarrassment or the looks you’ll receive from the other, as you had no doubt that they heard you guys' arguing. 

As you walk away Armando’s angry facade slips away as he drops his head into his hands, with regret.  

He knew that what he did was for the right reasons, even before his conversation with Mike, even when he had first met and seen you, he knew that something was different about you. But the life that he had lived so far has been so devoid of love.... not just affection but real love, that he jumped at the opportunity to experience it with you once it was finally offered.  

And now as he leaned against the counter with his head in his hand, he wiped away at his tears of frustration, while staring blankly at nothing. Did he fuck up the only chance he had at happiness? 

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Everyone could sense the tension between you two but chose to ignore it ,as you all gather up your things and load into the van. Seeing that the back was going to be crowded you choose to sit in the front with Rita, not really wanting to be in Armandos presence, as y’all make your way to the safe house. 

Noticing this Marcus closed the back of the van doors, confused on why his daughter wouldn’t want to sit next to the boy in front of him. As the van begins to move Armando could feel everyone stares, as he leaned against the van walls, eyes closed as he attempts to relax. 

Sighing when he starts hearing slight muttering to his left he opens his eyes, "Speak up, If your gonna talk shit about me, at least have the balls to do it to my face.” 

“You know you're a fucking asshole,right!” Dorn says face red with anger from the way Armando spoke to you. 

Humming in agreement Armando stares emptily at him, "Heard that one before.... anyone else got something to say." Tilting his head to the left he see Kelly glaring at him with the same angry expression. "She genuinely started to like you even when I tried to warn her, she chooses you of all people to show love and affection; just for you to act like that asshole Rafe!” 

Sitting up at this, Armando furrows his brows at her words, "Who's Rafe?” 

“Y/N ex-boyfriend and an ex-member of the AMMO Squad, you ran into him a couple of times when you were still working under the cartel." Marcus says crossing his arm as he watched the scene unfold in front of him. 

Rolling his eyes as he remembers that smug member of the group he scoffs, "I'm nothing like that asshole,get your facts straight before comparing me to him.” 

“Nah the comparison is pretty accurate, and you both done her wrong." Dorn says looking like he’s ready to launch at Armando. 

Becoming frustrated he shakes his head in disagreement, "You don’t have a fucking clue about the way I feel about Y/N,so mind your fucking business!" Armando says feeling anger flare inside of him. 

“Oh Yeah! If you felt so strongly about her, why the hell did you treat her like that in the kitchen!" Kelly says with frustration, seconds away from pulling her gun on him again. 

“Y’all just drop this convo-” Before Mike could defend his son, Marcus cuts in "No! Mike you been defending this boy all day, I need to know the reasons behind his actions, especially when it comes to my daughter!” 

Groaning in frustration Armando glances at his father debating if he should tell the others or not. Staring his son down Mike shakes his head in disagreement but after seeing his son almost pleading stare he sighs, "Tell them what you told me.” 

Everyone looked at the two confused as Mike says this, "What have y’all been keeping from us!", Marcus says with worry written all over his face. 

“Before I completed any assassination, I liked to study my victims, you know learn their habits and hangout spots....” Armando says face harden as he reflects on his memories and actions. “During that time, I learned how you all worked and function, even knew that you two were fucking even, before I completed my observations." Armando says pointing at Kelly and Dorn who become flush at his words. 

Sighing he rubs at his eyes, "I was supposed to execute each and every one of you, the night after I shot Mike.”  

Everyone froze at his words except for Mike who grimace from the memory of being shot. Armando shifted in his seat as he watches the unsure gazes of the people around him. 

“I know you killed Captain Conrad....but why didn’t you go after the rest of us." Marcus says wondering what stopped him from continuing his assassinations against the squad. 

Closing his eyes for a split second, he runs his hands through his hair before looking up at Marcus with a shaky smile,” Y/N. ” 

Not expecting that everyone stares at Armando confused and surprised as he says your name. "She wasn’t even involved with the case, when you were after the squad!" Kelly says thinking that Armando was lying. 

“Yes, she wasn’t involved in the case but I always keep an eye on the family members just in case something goes sideways, but one night when I was scoping out the station, I wasn’t watching where I was going and I ran into her." he says smiling softly at the memory. 

“She seemed upset and tears was clouding her vision, so I can see why she doesn’t remember me.” Pausing Armando look at the others before continuing, "It was the way she franticly apologized and made sure I was alright... that had me second guessing my orders......how could someone who was clearly experience the worst pain in their life, disregard her feelings to make sure a stranger was okay." he said glancing around at the team. 

Everybody just sat there and listened about how your one act of kindness, potential saved them from knocking at deaths door. "That's why when she walked through the door this morning, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.” 

Leaning over to Mikes ear, Marcus whispers, "Looks like it’s the LOWREYS who can’t keep away from us BURNETTS.” 

Rolling his eyes Mike ignores Marcus comments, as he continues to listen to Armando explanation. "But that doesn’t explain why you said those things to her." Dorn says making Armando drop the small smile he had on his face.  

Blinking he looks down at his hands, "I just snapped...I didn’t mean for my words to come out that way, I never felt like this for someone....ever, it's like every cell in my body went into defense mode, when they realized that my heart was beating quicker for a different reason other than protecting myself....” 

Sighing his eyes squeezed shut as he muttered words that shocked everyone, "I think I’m in love with, Y/N.” 

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 

The drive to the safe house was surprisingly peaceful as you and Kelly talk about your bad taste in men. It’s funny how crying helps relieve the pain, in your chest temporally after being hurt by someone. 

“I just don’t understand what happened it was like his whole attitude towards me just shifted......maybe he was finally showing me, his true colors." you said wiping at your eyes. 

Pulling into the driveway Rita, puts the van in park before turning towards you, "I wish I could give you an explanation for his actions but men are weird when it comes to dealing with their emotions," Sighing she leans against the driver seat eyes moving to look at the dashboard, "it's like their fight or flight kicks in....and the men I chosen so far always pick the fight, then flight after getting what they want.” 

“But the heart wants, what it wants.... right?" you say still apprehensive about the emotions you were feeling at the moment. 

Turning towards you she gives you a small smile, "Your young you still have the chance and opportunity on finding someone who truly cares for you....and yes, the heart wants what it wants but don’t forget about this one either." she says pointing to her head while making direct eye contact with you. 

“Be smart Y/N,I’m just giving you advice from someone who has let her heart decide on what she needs multiple times......and let me tell you how wrong it’s been." she says laughing slightly, while blinking the tears away that threatens to fall. 

“Oh, I know, I've had problems with that too." you said laughing along with her. 

You two sit in comfortable silence, allowing the a/c to be heard as its humming noise filled the empty noise around you two. Lost in thought you sit in the passenger seat reflecting on everything you two talked about but before you can completely space out, someone knocked hard on your window. 

Jumping from the abrupt noise you turn to see, Kelly standing by the door with an apologetic smile. Rolling down the window you give her an annoyed look, “You ain’t on duty, why you knocking on my window like you trying to give me a ticket?” 

Shaking her head at your comment, she laughs while leaning against the passenger door, "Just wanted to see if you had completely left mentally, and everyone already went inside the house,they wanted me to check up on you two.” 

“Really, I didn’t even notice." you said unbuckling your seat belt, while Rita turns the van off and complete the same motions as you. 

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Upon entering the safe house, the men seemed to already have set up a sleeping arrangement as everyone turned in for the night. Glancing to the side you make eye contact with Armando for a split second before shifting your gaze to a different area of the house. Setting your bag and Midnight down you asked your dad where you were sleeping. 

“There are only 4 rooms so we decided to sleep in pairs." Marcus says while digging through his bag. Tensing up you look around unsure before Dorn gives your shoulder a light squeeze, while slipping by you, "Don't worry he wanted to sleep on the couch.” 

Sighing in relief you nod, as you walked towards what you assumed was your bedroom for tonight. The room was only lit by the small lamp on the night stand, which provided only a little light but other than it looked quite cozy.  

Walking back out you go to pick up your duffel bag but freeze, at the sight before you. Midnight must have wonder towards Armando while you explored your room, you had to admit the sight of him playing with your little black fur baby was cute. Watching as his brown doe like eyes move up to meet yours with a hesitant smile, had you roll your eyes as you snatched up your bag, and quickly returned to your bedroom. 

Feeling the physical and mental toll of today finally kick in you hurriedly complete your night routine, and quickly get in the bed, opting to just sleep in your shirt. Turning the light off you lay in bed, as you watch the natural light from the moon shine through the windows. 

The funny thing about being tired is that the minute your head hit the pillow, you have that random burst of energy that keeps you from falling asleep too quickly. You tossed and turned for a good ten minutes before, letting out a loud sigh as you sit up. 

“Midnight usually sleeps with me.”you said figuring out the problem, groaning you throw the comforters off of you before, returning back to the living room. You quietly make your way to the living,and become confused when you don’t see him or Armando on the couch.Hearing quiet meows and a quick shushing from the kitchen makes you walk over wondering what they were up too. 

“She’s mad at me...I know.” Armando says staring down at the kitten as it stares up at him. Amused by the sight before you, you continue watching the interaction between the two from a distance. 

“What can I say to her...your mama kinda hard headed so she wouldn’t want to listen to me......but I don’t blame her." He sighs as he rubs the skin between his furrowed brows. Staring up at him Midnight tilts his head in confusion, as he watches the man before him. 

“Why the fuck would I say those things to her!" he exclaimed quietly as he lays against the table. Midnights lets out a few meows as he rubs his small frame against Armando, in an attempt to comfort the man in front of him. 

Sitting up Armando pets the kitten softly, "My bad little guy.... she would've got onto me for cursing in front of you.” 

Smiling to yourself at the interaction in front of you, you decided to come out of your little hiding spot. Midnight perks up as he sees you approach letting out happy noises, as he turns his attention to you. 

Confused Armando looks up but sucks in a breath as he sees you approaching them, but your eyes only remain on Midnight, as you pick up the small kitten. Laying the kitten against your chest, you give Armando a brief glance before returning back to your room. 

Slightly hurt by the way you barely acknowledge him; he gets up and follows you quietly calling out your name so he wouldn’t wake up the other’s. 

Hissing out a quiet What, you turn to face him, biting the inside of your cheek as you stare at him expectantly. Admiring your annoyed expression for a second, he asked if you two could talk. 

Rolling your eyes, you smack your lips quietly at his response, "You talked enough earlier remember and at this moment I have nothing to say to you." Turning back around you hear the quiet shuffling of his feet against the wooden floor as he followed you. 

 Before you could close the door on him, he pushed his way in closing the door behind him, while staring at you apologetic. 

“Armando, I really don’t have time for your BS tonight, I just want to go to sleep." you say becoming agitated at his persistence. 

“Y/N... please, all I want from you is to listen after this, I will leave you alone." he said not really believe that last part but he really just needed to explain himself. 

Sighing you sit on the bed, staring up at him quietly as you wait. He couldn’t help but let his eyes wander down your body, as he just realized that you're only wearing a shirt. 

Clearing your throat, you bring him back to reality, as his gaze return to your narrowed ones. "I'm not very good at expressing my feelings...so bare with me.” he says nervous as he feels your intense gaze on him. 

“It shouldn’t be that hard seeing that.... you were able to talk to Midnight truthfully.” you say watching as his eyes widened at your words. 

Nodding his head he sighs as he slowly begins explaining his actions from earlier, and the reasons behind his responses and words. His worried eyes shift between yours and the floor as he explains and apologizes for the way he spoken to you, nerves flaring slightly as he watches you listen to him without a hint of emotion on your face. 

After he finished, he stared down at you hoping and praying for any reaction, instead of the blank look that seems to remain on your face. 

Anxious to what you’ll say he huskily says your name as his eyes,franticlly move to meet yours. "Was that all?” you said blinking up at him a few times, eyes tracing his form as you wait for his response. Pausing at your words you watch in amusement as he stares at the ground, in thought before nodding his head. 

Walking past him Armando watches with confusion as you grab a small pillow from the chair in the corner of the room, and walk over to the bathroom. Placing Midnight on the pillow you leave the light on, as you walk back over to the front of the bed...calmly to calmly for Armandos liking. 

Laying against the bed you stare up at him with half-lidded eyes, "I don’t think I’m convinced just yet.....Mando.” Running his eyes down your relaxed form he swallows slightly at the sight of your thick brown legs teasingly opening before closing and the way that your taunting voice calls out to him, makes him blink a few times. 

Stepping towards you he hesitantly reaches out a hand to touch your leg only for you to smack his hands away. Confused he looks up at you with hunger but he waits for your response. 

“You think I’m going to let you touch me, after all that shit you was talking." you said grinning widely as his eyes move up to yours, watching his expression darken as it seems like he was having an internal battle with himself.

“Shit princess,I already said I was sorry…what else do you want me to do?”he said glancing at the way your harden nipples press against your shirt.

“I think you need help fixing that filthy mouth of yours Mando, and it looks like you're in luck cuz I have a perfect way of doing that." you say beckoning him over with your index finger, as you open up your legs for him. 

Shivering slightly at the sight of you, his dilated eyes shifted up to yours as he approached you, "Your sure, Nena?” 

Maintaining eye contact with him you nod, as he goes to raise your legs over his shoulder, but you press your foot against his firm chest. 

“What’d I say...put that pretty mouth of yours to work...and maybe I’ll forgive you.” 

Smirking as he hears the words he said to you earlier be used against him now,made him lick his lips while chuckling slightly.Laying against the bed in front of you,he quickly mutters yes ma'am before spreading your legs wider and diving straight in.

Even though tomorrow was a serious day, you two didn’t get much sleep as Armando showed you just how sorry he really was. 

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Authors Note:🎙️Y’all thought this was turning into a smut,don’t lie😏🫵🫵,and I know for sure he a eater so don’t fight me on it🧍🏾‍♀️ .

Anyways stay tuned for Part 9,Let’s see who survives 🙂

[qtkat]

being childhood friends with the main four would include..

gender: female (she/her)

warnings: none, other than it’s south park

request: no lol

a/n: this is my first time posting my fanfiction, so please be kind with any criticism! x <3

- being one of the only people eric can genuinely get along with

- because let’s be real, if he were to let a girl in his main friend group he’d definitely have to actually like you

- and if even eric likes you, the others definitely love you

- you’re really close with all of them, picking up kenny and karen with your shitty car every morning, slacking off and talking about whatever with stan in first period, rating the day’s school lunch with eric (you both take this very seriously), and letting kyle coach you through your biology homework after school

- you’re really the glue to their broship, because without you there kyle would’ve definitely dropped eric at some point and they would’ve split up the whole group

- but don’t worry, they don’t argue as much as they used to in elementary and middle school

- ironically you all have one period together, ap history with mr. garrison

- it’s definitely your favorite time of the day because you get to see all your favorite people at once

- it’s also definitely not mr. garrison’s favorite time of day, he’s hated you little gremlins since fourth grade (and you can’t really blame him)

- outside of school you try to see them as much as possible

- you definitely see kenny the most, he loves just hanging out at your house so he doesn’t have to be at his own

- he even takes karen with him sometimes, and you love babysitting her together and going out to hang around south park

- if you smoke you guys get blazed together all the time (it’s tegridy weed he steals from stan’s house when he’s there)

- whenever you’re just chilling with your other friends (like bebe or wendy) he comes up to you throughout the day to ask if you want to have a smoke break with him

- if you don’t smoke he definitely tries to blow the smoke away from your face as much as he can

- you’re his trip sitter

- he’s also visited you as mysterion, kind of like how they do in miraculous (if you catch my drift)

- you’ve definitely bragged about being friends with mysterion before, much to eric’s dismay

- speaking of eric’s dismay, he’s the most jealous friend you’ll ever have

- “who took that picture of you” “why aren’t you free this weekend?” “why won’t you go to casa bonita with me” “why do you hang out with that loser anyways” ALL. DAY. LONG.

- he loves hanging out with you alone the most so no one steals your attention away from him

- he likes people knowing you guys are friends since he thinks you’re cool (and honestly he just wants people to think he’s cool too, he cares)

- you don’t call him fatass and he really appreciates it, he doesn’t say it though

- you need to pick up a lot of the love you get from eric like context clues since he doesn’t ever really say it out loud

- also liane LOVES YOU

- she sees you as a good influence on her son

- she’s also the type to try and get you to eat over every time you come over (which i also see sheila doing)

- speaking of sheila she’d definitely invite you to celebrate hanukkah with the broflovskis, it became a yearly thing

- kyle and you are study buddies since he doesn’t want you to fail and stay a class behind

- he gets angry when he gets sad, and you can deal with that really well, you calm him down really easily

- you guys have deep conversations whenever you’re alone together

- you hang together on the roof of your house and watch the sunset while talking about the meaning of life or some shit LMAO

- if you also have textured hair you guys would have joint wash days and it’s so cute

- and 80% of the time you’re with kyle stan is there too

- not that you mind

- if you play and instrument you have definitely written music together with stan

- and even if you don’t you love hearing him play, you’re his number one fan

- jam sessions in his barn >>>

- i feel like i’m one of the only people who isn’t a football stan truther, like he’s literally a little nerd who plays guitar

- he plays warhammer with you if you’re into board games, and you guys get really into it together

- that first period chat i mentioned earlier? yeah definitely filled with your character lore and shit

- stan loves hanging out at your house to get away from his dad, honestly yours and eric’s houses are just the general hang out spots for the gang

- whenever you guys hang out with the five of you it’s mostly video games and chilling with food

- subsections of the group are definitely you/stan/kyle and you/kenny/eric (even though eric doesn’t like sharing you he gets really bad FOMO anytime he’s not there)

- whenever you hang with kenny and eric it’s filled with immature jokes, and probably weed too

- idk i just see kenny getting high 24/7 and i feel like eric would try smoking at least once

- kyle and stan won’t try weed, since stan hates it and kyle promised not to try weed to stan when randy bought tegridy farms

- and because butters is basically a bonus member of the group you’d definitely also be friends with him

- you, kenny and butters make the best trio ever, you guys have so much fun

- butters deserves someone sweet in his life and you two are definitely that to him

- whenever he’s working you and kenny just hang around the whole day in a booth, sometimes kyle comes over too to help you study a bit

- willy chilly’s is a hang out spot too, it seems so nice in the summer

- in conclusion you and the boys have a great friendship, and you have ever since you were young! it’s so cute honestly

[such-expensive-mistakes]

Superpham AU (part 7)

Masterpost

A short one today, but I thought this section was funny (until it got sad again).

-----

It’s a quiet evening in the Lane-Kent household: Lois is trying to turn her notes into an article, Clark is going over Jon’s math homework, and Jon is watching a show Lois is only half-following.  It features lots of gunfire and explosions, though Lois’s— unfortunately extensive— experience with witnessing real violence makes the version on TV look cartoonish.  She suspects that is part of the show’s appeal.

Danny is paying about as much attention to the TV as Lois is, engrossed in something on his phone.  At least he’s in the same room as the rest of them, instead of sequestering himself away.

“Hey Lois?” Danny suddenly asks.

Lois looks up from her work.  “What’s up?”

“Did you know the internet thinks you’re Superman’s girlfriend?”

Lois knows that if she looks at Clark, he’ll be turning red, the way he always does whenever this particular subject comes up.  Lois herself is barely holding back a laugh.  Jon’s wrinkling his nose, looking thoroughly embarrassed by his parents.

“Well, I am,” she says, barely keeping herself composed.

“No, I mean—” Danny begins.

“You mean people say that I’m dating Superman and married to Clark?”  Lois glances at Clark, who is now hiding his face in his hands.  “Someone forgot to check for cameras after rescuing me a few years back, and we got caught kissing on film.  It was let people think Superman is a homewrecker or let them think I’m in a polyamorous relationship with my husband and his alter ego.”  

“That’s… really weird.”  Danny is giving her the kind of judgmental look only teenagers can give.  

Lois does laugh at that.  “It is, a bit.  But it helps protect Clark’s secret identity, so I don’t mind.”

“Don’t listen to her,” Clark finally says.  “There were other ways to handle that situation; she just thinks this is funny.”

“Even your parents think it’s funny,” Lois says.  Clark just sighs, faux-aggrieved.  

“It’s not even the weirdest thing on the internet about Superman,” Danny says.  “It’s just the weirdest thing everyone agrees is true.”

“Please do not tell me what else you’ve found,” Clark says.  

“You can tell me,” Lois says.  “We can just make Clark leave for a bit.”  Reading conspiracy theories about Superman is her guilty pleasure, though if anyone asks, she does it to keep tabs on anyone who might have a viable way of hurting him.  

Danny just laughs, and something in Lois’s chest seizes up.  Is this the first time she’s heard him laugh since he came back?  She thinks it might be.

She doesn’t want to call attention to it; like as not, that would just make him pull away again.  Instead she says, “Superman doesn’t even get the best conspiracy theories.  Those are all Batman.”  That’s because Bruce purposefully cultivates them, of course, but that’s not important.

“Which one is he, again?” Danny asks.  

It’s not that Lois ever forgets that Danny has spent most of his life in another dimension.  But little offhand comments like that… they really drive it home.  There are plenty of superheroes, even Justice League members, that most of the general public has never heard of— but Batman is not one of them.

She's saved from answering by Clark.

"You'll meet him eventually," Clark says.  "He's a good friend of mine.  And Jon and Kon are close to his two youngest sons, Robin and Red Robin."

Danny nods thoughtfully.  "Right.  I think Red Robin's in the group chat Kon added me to."

Lois reminds herself to thank Kon next time she sees him.  He and Danny seem to have connected, and Kon seems to have made it his personal mission to keep Danny from slipping too far into one of his funks again.

"Speaking of Kon," Clark begins.  "Ma and Pa want to know when we'll be able to make it to Smallville to visit."

They've been trying not to overwhelm Danny by introducing him to too many new people at once, but maybe that was the wrong choice.  Maybe they should be pushing him to get out more, to connect with this dimension.  Besides, Kon spends most of his time in Smallville, and they already know that he and Danny get along.

Lois re-evaluates the article she’s been working on.  Perry would probably appreciate it sooner rather than later, but if she turns in a smaller article this week, she can probably swing a weekend off.  If not, she can always work on it from Kansas.

“This weekend should work,” Lois says.  “If that’s alright with you, Danny.”

Danny looks a little surprised to be consulted.  “I— yeah, that works.  Not like I have anywhere else to be.”  He laughs a little, but the joke falls flat, and Lois resolves to double down on helping Danny connect with more people here in this dimension.

[lefteagleblizzard]

𝕴𝖘𝖑𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖔𝖋 𝖘𝖊𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖙𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖉𝖊𝖘𝖎𝖗𝖊

Sean Anderson x gender neutral reader

Summary: you feel insicure and out of place inside of this group of people and Sean does all that he can to express to you how much wrong you are.

It’s so sad that there are no fics for him :(. I felt the need to write one for him considering he is the first one I watched. He is so underrated.

Warnings: no pronouns used for reader. Insecure reader. Best friends to lovers. Soft smut. Soft dom Sean. Sean and reader are 18+ in this one.

Can also be found on wattpad and ao3

The fire crackled, casting flickering shadows on the ancient trees that surrounded us. The mysterious island had drawn all of you together. You sat cross-legged on a rough-hewn log, your fingers tracing patterns in the dirt as you listened to the crackling sound of the campfire.

Sean sat beside you. His eyes were fixed on the flames, their golden glow reflecting in his eyes. Sean was brilliant, his mind a labyrinth of knowledge and curiosity. You’ve always admired his intelligence, the way he dives headfirst into puzzles and riddles. But lately, there’s something more, a warmth that settles in your chest when he smiles, a flutter when his hand brushes against yours.

He'd been the one to decipher the code that led us here, and now, with his ankle wrapped in makeshift bandages, he leaned heavily against your shoulder. His pain was etched in the lines around his eyes, but he refused to complain.

Hank, Sean's stepfather, knelt by the fire, tending to the flames. His hands were gnarled from years of hard work, but they moved with a gentle grace as he adjusted the logs.

When Sean had twisted his ankle on the treacherous path, Hank had popped it back into place without hesitation. They never got along that well, but you could see both of them slowly warming up to each other’s.

Now, he strummed a ukulele, its sweet notes weaving through the night air while he tried to cheer him up. The melody was haunting, a balm for your weary souls. You don’t know if Sean felt the same way, however, as he pressed his face on your shoulder, groaning from embarrassment as you laughed together with Hank.

Gabato, the stranger who'd washed ashore with you, Sean and Hank, sat across from Hank. His skin was bronzed by the sun, and he looked deep in thoughts.

Then there was Kailani, Gabato's daughter. She perched on a moss-covered rock, her dark hair falling in loose waves around her shoulders.

She was everything you weren’t: bold, beautiful, and unafraid.

Kailani's fingers brushed Sean's as she reached for a piece of fruit, and your heart clenched.

You and Sean had always been close. He was a mix of handsome and nerdy, the kind of person who could talk no stop about something for hours only to stutter an excuse for annoying who was around him.

You had been there, by his side, helping him, supporting him. Hank had even mistaken you for a couple at first, which had left both of you blushing and stammering awkward denials.

Despite your close bond, tonight, you felt out of place, a shadow among these vibrant people.

The conversation around the fire blurred into a background hum as you retreated into your thoughts. You couldn't help but compare yourself to Kailani. She seemed perfect for Sean: adventurous, beautiful, and able to match his curiosity and excitement for the unknown. What did you have to offer in comparison?

You see the way Sean looks at her: admiration mixed with something deeper.

You glanced down at your entwined hands, a gesture that you two made without even realizing it many times but that you now have become accustomed to it.

Sean's grip was warm and steady, but you felt the weight of inadequacy. What did you have to offer in this strange company? You weren’t brilliant like Sean or strong like Hank. You couldn't spin tales that made everyone laugh like Gabato or beautiful like Kailani. You were just the quiet observer, the outsider.

Sean deserve someone who could match his intellect, who could share his passion for unraveling mysteries.

His gaze lingered on you face.

“You’re okay?” he murmured, his grip tightening slightly on my hand.

You forced a smile. “Yeah, just tired.”

His eyes narrowed, and you knew he saw through my lie. But he didn’t push. Instead, he leaned back against the log, his expression thoughtful.

“Hmm.” Sean’s voice held a hint of skepticism. “You know you can talk to me, right?”

“Yes, I know”

Then Sean squeezed your hand, and you looked into his eyes. They held warmth, understanding. You blinked back tears, your heart swelling.

⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈⎈

The night was a velvet shroud, cradling the island in its cool embrace. The fire had dwindled to a mere whisper of its former glory, and the forest rustled with secrets. Everyone else slept, their breaths soft and even, but your mind churned like the restless waves beyond the shore.

You laid on your makeshift bed of leaves and moss, staring up at the canopy of stars. Sean's breathing was steady beside your, his face relaxed in slumber. But you couldn't find rest. The weight of your insecurities pressed down, threatening to suffocate you.

And then, as if sensing your turmoil, Sean stirred. His fingers brushed your cheek, gentle as moonlight. He murmured your name softly, his voice a fragile thread. "Are you awake?"

The night air was cool, carrying whispers of pine and moss. Sean stood up from his position, his expression both nervous and determined. You blinked at him, your heart doing a clumsy pirouette.

“Hey” he said, his voice soft yet resolute. He hesitated for a moment before speaking again. "Do you want to take a walk? Get some fresh air?"

He chose you and not her

You started to get up from your position. “Where?” Your heart was beating faster the more your brain started to understand the intimacy of the situation.

Sean’s eyes sparkled. “Deep into the woods,” he said. “I found a spot earlier where I saw something beautiful that I wanted to show you”

He stood before you, his hand outstretched, inviting you into the unknown.

“But your leg,” you blurted out, noticing his leg free from the bandages you used on him.

He waved off my concern. “It’s fine now. Hank worked his magic. I feel hardly any pain now. Besides, I want to show you something.”

Your heart fluttered. He wanted to share a secret with me. You pushed aside your insecurities and took his hand.

Outside, the forest enveloped you two. The moon peeked through the canopy, casting dappled patterns on the forest floor. Sean led you deeper, his steps sure. You stumbled once, but he caught you, his touch warm and steady.

“Where are we going?” You asked again, voice barely audible.

Sean's eyes sparkled, and he pressed a finger to his lips, urging silence. You were like two conspirators, sneaking out for a midnight rendezvous.

As you ventured deeper into the woods, Sean's steps were catlike,each one calculated to avoid twigs and fallen leaves. You tried to mimic his stealth, but your foot caught on a stubborn root, and you stumbled. Sean caught you, his lips curving into a half-smile.

"Graceful," he teased, and you swatted his arm playfully. "You're lucky a giant lizard didn't hear that."

You shuddered, remembering this morning's close encounter. In a way it made Sean remember that close encounter he had with that dinosaur when he was alone in the center of the earth, a story that you loved to hear from him from time to time and that he loved to tell you whenever you asked.

You were so cute to him whenever you showed curiosity towards him.

And now, in the heart of the forest, Sean stopped. His gaze fixed on a cluster of vibrant blue. Butterflies, dozens of them, flitted among the ferns, their wings shimmering like shards of sky.

"Look," he said, his voice hushed. "They're like living gems."

You watched, mesmerized, as the butterflies danced. Their flight was erratic yet purposeful, weaving intricate patterns in the moonlight. One landed on your outstretched palm, its wings brushing your skin. You held it gently, your eyes alight with wonder.

You reached out, your fingertip grazing the butterfly's iridescent wing. "They're breathtaking."

Sean leaned closer, his breath warm against your cheek. "You know what else is breathtaking?" he murmured. "You."

Your heart stuttered. "Me?"

"I've always liked you. More than liked you. Given the place where we ended up thanks to me I thought it would be better to tell you.“

"But Kailani—" You begin, your voice faltering.

His gaze lingering on your face. His fingers brushing yours.

“Is that why you’ve been quiet tonight?” he said softly.

Your gaze dropped to the ground, unable to look him in the eyes “I just… I feel inadequate sometimes.”

“Inadequate?” Sean’s voice held a mix of confusion and concern.

You nodded, your throat tight. “Yeah. Like a ghost that nobody notices” His thumb brushed your knuckles. “Why would you think that?”

“Because you’re amazing, Sean. You’re smart, funny, and everyone loves you. And then there’s me, just ordinary.”

His laughter was soft, a gentle melody. “Ordinary? You’re extraordinary.”

You scoffed. “Right. I’m not as smart or outgoing as you. I stumble over my words, and I’m not exactly the life of the party.”

“You don’t need to be.” His eyes held mine. “You’re enough. More than enough.”

You leaned into his palm, your heart aching with gratitude. “Why do you say that?”

“Because you listened when I kept rambling about that coded signal my grandfather left. You remember all the time that we spent together trying to decipher it? You always cheered me up when I was about to give up from frustration. You notice the little things like the way I take my coffee, the songs that make me smile. And you make the best hot chocolate on chilly nights.”

“That’s just—”

“No, it’s not ‘just.’ It’s everything.” His lips brushed mine, a soft promise. “You’re my anchor. The one who I want to be with all the time”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “I love you, Sean.”

“And I love you.” He ducks to kiss you. It's gentle and sweet and romantic, a kiss that tasted of moonbeams and promises. His mouth moved against yours, gentle yet urgent. It was a kiss that held all the words you needed to hear, the reassurance, the longing, the desire to banish your insecurities.

He nudges you to walk backwards until your back hits a tree. Your lips remained sealed in this kiss that was tentative at first but grew deeper and more fervent. Sean's hands moved to cradle your face gently, his thumbs caressing your cheeks. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

The kiss deepened, fueled by a passionate urgency. The wild world around you completely vanished, leaving you two enveloped in your own cocoon of warmth and longing.

Sean trailed kisses down your neck, and sucked on a sweet spot which caused you to let out the sweetest moans Sean has ever heard.

"Tonight's all about you”

Sean loved the way you gasped, the way your fingers curled in his shirt as you pressed yourself into him, hips dragging down onto him.

Your laughter, your scent, the feel of your hand on his upper arm, he had become utterly smitten with you and he knew there was no turning back, nor did he want to.

Lips seeking skin, tongue flicking out to pull little gasps from your lips. Soft and yielding as he pressed between your legs, pulling them around his waist. His name torn from your lips as he whispered against them, “precious, wonderful, so good,” he moved slowly, taking his time as he told you just how good you felt.

Loved slowly exploring your body with his, finding new ways to make you gasp his name, new ways that would cause you to arch into him, dragging him closer, his curiosity was insatiable.

As he started pushing in, your eyes filled with tears, of love and euphoria. You whimpered from the intrusion and he just kissed you sweetly to distract you from the pain. Sean noticed the wetness flowing down your cheeks, and kissed them lovingly.

Heat rose to your cheeks, you moved a hand covering your face, stifling an embarrassed chuckle. Sean tutted, pulling your hand away and pressing his lips against yours, hips never ceasing as he felt you tighten around him.

Gods, he was addicted to your small whimpers, the taste of you, all of you.

He smiled, hand catching your jaw, “ready?” you nodded, the coil in your belly tightening, snapping as he went in harder, faster.

It ended like this, you first with him losing his rhythm, driving into you until he let out a groan that he suppressed by biting his face in your neck.

“I love you.” He grinned as you responded with giggles, the sound that always made his heart flutter.

Thank you for reading and for all the likes on my other stories <3