#which is basically to only acknowledge it when i’m about to make a big change and he sends me a text

[trashcandroid]

Apparently my mom shares trans memes on her facebook, which is… cool I guess? But she also still posts old pictures of me all the time

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

Angel Dust Redesign! (7/7)

FINALLY I AM DONE WITH THE MAIN 7 FREAKS.

Depending how I feel I might throw in some bonuses but these guys are your only guarantees! Going to be posting the full lineup separately because I don’t want to clutter this post!!

God okay where to start. I was talking about them in Husk’s post so let’s go with that. Angel’s clothing restrictions are his necklace and shoes. I might go on a bit of a tangent with this so forgive me 💔

For the necklace let me get this out of the way: yes it is a BDSM thing! I’m terrified people are going to take this as me being a weirdo but please as an adult content creator give me some space to explain before anyone jumps on me and hits me with a metal pipe. The intentions behind symbolism matter HEAVILY. I am against Vivzie’s portrayal of Angel’s abuse and the chain/collar imagery because it is blatantly either her being incredibly uncreative or her inserting her kinks into her shows. I think it is completely fine to use suggestive items in this way as long as the intentions are clear and not just there for no reason.

I would’ve probably done something else like a corset as a restriction, but I’d like to stop being so shy about Angel’s actual job. He is a pornstar and removing that outward aspect of him is taking a big chunk of his character away. I need more people to acknowledge that Angel enjoys sex and actively wanted to explore this side of himself. With the slip chain however, I would also like to portray how things Angel enjoys in his job have been used against him and made him come to resent what he does when he is forced into it. I think thats a pretty understandable thing to show.

This is harder to explain but the gist of it is just don’t be afraid to acknowledge Angel’s job. It’s okay to use sexual things as metaphors. Have you heard any christian song ever/hj

Alright with that out of the way, with the shoes. Angel’s feet are a large insecurity and discomfort of his which already makes his shoes some sort of restriction on their own, however if controlled, they can be made to stumble forward, fall over, etc. I wanted to show how Angel has freedom to go mostly wherever he pleases, though once again, that free will can be taken away very quickly.

I hated his suit so all suiting is gone entirely. He’s supposed to look attractive or eye catching at the very least. I’ve also added back the outer fangs he had in my first redesign!

I am much happier with the new one in comparison to this old guy. I know it’s only a few months old but you can really see how differently I draw him and the details I pay attention to more like the shape of his hair. Aside from the old one! I wanted Angel himself to still keep the reddish pink to show wrath and destain being masked as lust, except now his clothing is actually the pinkish-purple lust colour and it covers more eye grabbing parts of his body like the chest, hands, hips, and so on.

I don’t think I’ve ever outwardly mentioned Angel having polycoria but he does and it’s probably my favourite feature to draw aside from his hair. About the hair and fur: Angel used to have spots and basic stripes before his contract with Valentino, where afterwards they began to curl into their cordiform shapes. Most physical overlord changes with hair and skin tend to not go away, so depending on who you make a contract with it’s either a fun perk or a sort of scar.

Once again, not sure if I will be continuing with anymore in this specific lineup, but if I do end up posting more of these I really hope you like those too! 💣

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

hi. alot is happening. bumming off wifi rn. i'm copy/pasting someone from a doc i started in libra office with no internet.

A LOT IS HAPPENING BEHIND THE SCENES AND I’M KEEPING TRACK.

The landlady has made excuses to not give us back the security deposit. She keeps having Dave’s boss call him in a foul mood will all kind of threats and accusations of things we supposedly broke/ruined.

1.) On our first night out of there she has already threatened to call the cops on us by claiming that we filled the house with perfume before we left so it’ll hurt her. What happened was we cleaned it because she demanded that it was clean like it supposedly was when we moved in(it wasn’t clean when we moved in). We used that Meyers shit, which has a pretty muted scent and is supposed to be safe for the environment. And it was just basic sweeping, dusting, and then doing up the ktichen and bathroom just to be safe.

2.) Today she has claimed that we filled the washing machine with motor oil to ruin it as punishment before we left. She swears the whole house smells of oil, after screaming about it smelling like too much perfume that was supposedly used to hurt her breathing. Mind you, mom is an asthmatic so we can’t use things with strong scents because it will fuck her up. If we bought oil, it would be for the van cuz that shit is expensive and we wouldn’t be wasting it on HER of all people.

By now, Dave’s boss is aware that she cannot legally withold the deposit and that she’s trying to use the fact that Dave is a dumbass, against him. Mom however, knows the laws, and the lease said nothing about not using scented cleaners OR perfumes, and she does not have a legit reason to not give us the $1600 back. If she took it to court it would not hold. She has to make an itemized list of her claims, Dave has to acknowledge whether or not they are true, and then it goes to court.

fyi I took videos of everything in the house. Bethy’s Room, Mom’s Room, Bathroom, Living Room, Dining Room, Kitchen. All items that were hers, such as the Oven, Fridge, Washer, Dryer, Toilet, Sinks,Tub/Shower, random Recycle Bin, and Wall Hangings. Inside and Out. All details were recorded before we left. I even recorded us leaving at exactly 11:23 PM Feb 15th 2024, and recorded turning the light off.

Let’s see if she comes up with something else tomorrow. ~5:22 PM Feb, 17th 2024

3.)

Feb, 21st 2024:

I’ve just been informed by Bethy that Dave has gone on to further embarrass us. He insists that he’s got all these racing friends(and tbf they promised to help fund a big event to raise money for us 2 years ago, and then ghosted him AND Bethy when they asked what they had to do to help) who will help and has been harassing them for money.

One of them, an active dirt racer, posted a screenshot with Dave’s full name in a text convo begging for cash. And then half a dozen other dirt racers, active and retired, shared that he’s been hitting them up for money too. How he was in people’s posts about random shit beggn for money and then how he got swindled under his own comment by someone mocking him and posting the same thing he did with a small wording change about leaving an abusive house and Dave not only fell for it but then said he’d try to help them.

And now the greater dirt racing community is aware of this and are mocking him and us and some are making inquiries about Bethy’s well-being in connection to Dave. And their wives are having things to say about how he’s a bad parent and she should be taken away from him.

And I need to remind everyone that this is to pay off a blackmailer who is demanding $300 a week now. Bethy got a bit more info out of him on that and it apparently involves a photo. And there are only 2 types of photos that can get him in legal trouble(since he believes he CAN go to jail over this). So either he sent an unsolicited dick pic, which won’t receive much punishment cuz he’s a man who LOOKS white enough. OR it’s child p0rn, and he’s never given that vibe out of everything fucked up with him so I’m not exactly sure.

But he walks around demanding to know ‘did anyone give us money yet’ and people have donated to the GFM and Mealtrain, and I’ve earned about $100 on Ko-Fi recently, and we haven’t told him cuz he won’t use it for anything good.

He’s been bumming extra money off his boss despite knowing that the van need fixing, we need hot water and heat, and several other problems that need fixing ASAP. And his boss is asking questions and is getting nastier and nastier cuz he doesn’t trust Dave’s intentions and shitty lying.

There is no lease. The owner of this house knows Dave's boss and they supposedly came to an agreement that so long as Dave fixes up this house, we can stay here in the mean time for free. They supposedly made an agreement that Dave's boss will buy everything we need to fix the house up and then send all the receipts to the friend who will then pay him back.

And now Dave's boss is getting so fed up with Dave and his wishy-washy behavior and begging for all this money all the time that he does not earn, that he is now saying he never made any such promises. And he refuses to contact the owner of this house at all. There is no recording. No contract. No signatures. No proof that such a discussion went down at all. It is Dave’s word(unreliable) against the boss’(the one with money and power here) word.

Dave has no way to contact the owner either. Cuz he didn’t think that was necessary apparently. He was perfectly fine making his boss the go-between until his boss got angry.

So our ability to even stay here is hanging in the balance.

Can’t wait to see what other bad news I’m gonna find out.

[awakenedsalamander]

Alright, so I’ve obviously given Mage and Vampire some attention. It’s about time I talk about Werewolf: The Apocalypse, you know, round out the “big three.”

Truth be told, I have kind of a love/hate relationship with Werewolf, though that kinda implies it’s an even split of things I enjoy and things I don’t, but that’s not quite correct.

A more accurate breakdown of my feelings would be something like:

- 60% stuff I really love and appreciate

- 20% stuff I go back and forth on

- 15% stuff I dislike but can tolerate (pretty standard for WoD)

- 5% stuff I really, truly, passionately loathe

And it’s honestly that last 5% that I struggle with most. To be clear, a lot of the WoD games have things in them I don’t just dislike, but find sincerely objectionable or harmful. (A certain Vampire sourcebook, the title of which I can’t even comfortably write out, immediately comes to mind.) But I get past those things, because 1) no work of art is morally flawless, and your tastes as a hobbyist or audience member are not your ethics as a human being and 2) a lot of that stuff is from the older editions and has largely been divorced from the game.

So what’s different about Werewolf?

Well, some of it lies in point 2— there are things in Werewolf that are bad and (barring the controversy of 5th Edition’s lore changes, which is a whole other kettle of fish that I’d rather not dive into right now) are still part of the game. Improved somewhat? Absolutely. But the ugliness of some choices still haunts the game.

The ways Werewolf: The Apocalypse talks about native peoples, from Indigenous Australians to First Nations Americans, is a big example. I don’t feel it prudent for me to go into those details, if only because I think it’s not my lane and voices from those cultures should really lead those discussions, but the game has a very weird attitude toward indigenous groups— at one recognizing their history and the atrocities they’ve come through with respect, while still finding ways to exoticize that history, and appropriate much of it. To say nothing of the ways in which it feels comfortable speaking over indigenous groups, even in matters of their rights.

That’s just one example. There’s the way Werewolf conceptualizes ethnicity and ancestry in general, which is weirdly archaic in places despite seemingly trying to criticize that view. There’s its approach to disability and bodies that differ from an assumed norm, which as many have observed can sometimes come across as genuinely eugenicist on occasion.

And of course, the game is about monsters— you’re not meant to agree with the Garou on much of their beliefs, and you’re meant to engage with those very real issues and wrestle with the right way forward.

And honestly? That last part— the reality of the issues at hand— that’s what makes the bad parts of Werewolf so hard to look past. You know, the other games in the World of Darkness deal with real world issues, but they do so in a fairly abstract way. Like, sure I can and do identity the Technocracy of Mage with destructive and cruel systems of power in the real world, but like… there isn’t actually a league of hypereconomists using secret math to influence the fate of the world. That’s just an exaggerated and metaphorical way to engage with the problems at the heart of a late-capitalist world.

But Pentex? Pentex is basically real. The Apocalypse in Werewolf: The Apocalypse is climate change. It’s happening now. When the game tells you that you need to Rage against the dying of Gaia… that’s almost as literal as it gets. And that makes its fumbles, its mistakes, and yes, its deliberate offenses, harder to swallow. The stakes are high enough that when things are wrong, it really hurts.

But… let’s also acknowledge: The reality I’m talking about it? It’s what makes that 60% stuff I like so amazing. The lows of Werewolf are hard to stomach, but the highs are just… exhilarating.

Like, Werewolf is a game that says, “You see the state of the world? You see its monstrous past? Its insidious present that only hides the horror? Do you see the doomed future its on a crash course with? Let’s take it, and let’s rip it to fucking shreds. It these tyrants and thieves want to kill the world, then we’ll kill them first, if that’s what it takes. If the Apocalypse happens, it happens on our terms, on the terms of the people being victimized and shoved to the margins. You and I? We’re gonna build a better world or die trying. All our anger might ruin us, but we have to try. The consequences of our actions are dire, but we don’t go down without making the bastards work for it. Not without a fight.”

And fuck, when the game is saying that? It’s priceless.

In fact, this has all been too down on Werewolf as a whole. I want to get my problems with the game out front, just to acknowledge them and keep space for the critique and change that they demand, but at the end of the day, I am a Werewolf: The Apocalypse fan (if one with a lot of notes). I want to do something a little unusual and show you an outline for an Apocalypse chronicle I haven’t yet had the chance to run, to show you what I love about the game.

So, stay tuned for a glimpse into that later— a glimpse into “Blood Ripples Out.”

[smallandalmosthonest]

considering that they said they dont wanna make a guy queer and then have him crush on his best friend immediately (cause cliches or whatever) i think eddie is going to be the one to take The Step which makes buddie canon. do you have any ideas or wishes as to what he could do or what could happen?

i mean if i’m being perfectly honest i think being in love with your bestie is a quintessential bisexual rite of passage and the whole ‘cliche’ thing always seemed a silly argument to me.

my wish would be that eddie’s “this doesn’t change a thing between us” come back to haunt him. i’m a playwright/new play dramaturg for my day job and that line feels like such a loaded gun — if this were a script i was developing i would IMMEDIATELY flag that line. he could have said anything else to the same effect (“you’re always gonna be my best friend,” “i’m proud of you,” “i love you no matter what,” whatever) but that line plants a seed for the audience; THAT LINE is what introduces us to the IDEA that anything between them COULD change. because before eddie said it, I Highly Doubt anyone watching the show was like “ohhhhh he’s gonna have a problem with buck dating dudes.” other than his bitch4bitch bickering with josh while at dispatch, we’ve never been given any indication that eddie could or would have any ~discomfort around queer men; that line might feel necessary if eddie were a different character, if the show had fewer queer characters, or if it wasn't LA in 202?, but it went off like a siren when i first watched the scene.

they’ve also just set up a beautiful context for eddie to have a queer realization arc:

eddie diaz was basically a teen dad; shannon was "the first woman he slept with"/dated, and he's been Shannon's Husband/Christopher's Father/Shannon's Widow ever since. but NOW christopher is temporarily out of the picture, and eddie has to confront what his life looks like when he's not being a father first and a man second. unless the writers really fumble this plot point going into s8, eddie is all tee'd up for some major self-reflection revelations/forced exploration of the self

we've established the boy has catholic guilt out the wazoo. he acknowledged a "reservoir" of this guilt that lies dormant; he basically admitted to being Deeply Repressed About Shit onscreen while talking about how he couldn't get it up for his gf

beyond "my gf was a nun and now i can't fuck her and this has nothing to do with her moving in with me whatsoever" we also have "someone assumed my gf was my wife/my son's mother and i had a panic attack so severe i ended up in the hospital"

i'm not even gonna talk about the kim thing

plus, buck is bi!!!!!

buck "checking out a hot guy's ass is normal ally behaviour" buckley is one of the most important people in eddie's life. i think it would make perfect sense for eddie to see buck's coming out journey, to see a masc dude have a queer realization in his thirties, and have some feelings about that.

"so, you always knew?" "no, man, not at all. it's more like NOW that i know, everything else makes sense." <- you know what i mean???? scenes i would write if i were in the writer's room tim if you can hear me

PLUS, eddie is friends with tommy! they canonically instantly became super close! so not only could we see eddie's queer awakening through scenes with buck, we could ALSO see them through scenes with tommy! we've seen it in the fanfics, my siblings in christ: eddie goes from loving tommy and hanging out with him always to suddenly being Weird about it.

at the end of the day this is an ensemble show and i think i would want to see eddie having big conversations with either bobby or hen about it and i do solidly vote for the whole third-party thing (i can totally see chimney can't-keep-a-secret han losing his patience and basically telling eddie "you're in love with buck" like the gif)

this ask got away from me. i want it to be mutual. i want to burn for a whole season or more, where they're both slowly realizing they're in love with each other, until finally one of them grabs his keys to go to the other's place and just tell him but when he opens the door to leave the other one is standing right there, and they just say each other's names and it's awkward and stilted but they're both there to say i love you

[sadly-in-active]

Hey Dazai abuser

It’s me.

Can I request Sablé Cookie x a fallen angel reader???

🌝

(I know damn well that this situation would never be canon but I can dream)

Sincerely, 🌸 Anon

I’m going to throw you off of a cliff (again) because you keep reviving 💔 and you’re also my buddy on this blog why don’t you write it yourself I literally gave you my email 🤦‍♂️ /silly /affectionate

Sablé Cookie x Fallen Angel Reader

Summary: You, a fallen angel, were cast out by the Divines, your wings scorched and damaged by their punishment. When you landed in the mud of the Lower City of the Créme Republic, Sablé, a powerful politician, found you. Concerned for your well-being, she called for guards to get you treated. Afterward, she took you to her home, where you woke up from a month-long coma.

TW: Mentions of religion, abuse, blood (I’m not calling it strawberry jam no more it’s too much), I write like I’m playing project sekai, suicidal thoughts

While you were in your coma, Sablé always talked with Baumkuchen about your recovery, since she was quite fascinated on how you even came to be. Angels weren’t a big topic in the Créme Republic, but any paintings or statuettes of these winged beauties always caught her eye. She managed to make time to visit you while you were still gravely injured, examining you. Heck, she even sketched you in her notebook at times while you were unconscious.

Surprisingly, your recovery was speedy, but you were still unconscious. When Baumkuchen noticed that, he was a bit shocked, to be honest. No normal being should’ve been able to recover in under a week. Those were severe injures, as severe as the ones he got. He wanted to study you, but in more of the medicinal aspects. However, Sablé insisted on taking you back to her mansion, which the other Elder reluctantly agreed. They both kept a vow never to tell anyone about you, not yet of course. There would be too much questions. Too much risk.

—

Once you woke up, she was sitting right beside your bedside, sketching you once more. But don’t worry, she stopped once she noticed you were awake. She answered most of your questions, so you basically got the gist of what happened in the past month while you were recovering. She was smart enough to know that asking you questions would just make you more stressed, and she didn’t want that to happen to a wonderful beast like you!

But over the next week or two, as you continued to get better, the two of you started talking more. However, you seemed quite detached and quiet, as if you didn’t have a purpose anymore. Sablé questioned why you looked so solemn, but she wasn’t expecting that her suspicions were correct.

Ever since you were cast out by the Divines, you didn’t have any sense of purpose anymore. Your devotion disappeared, the only reason you lived was to serve. Now that you can’t, things have been getting worse. You questioned whether continuing to live was even worth it. If the Divines wouldn’t accept you, then who would?

Who could ever compare to such beings?

—

Since that conversation, Sablé has tried to make you her muse. Always painting you, making you model for her as she sculpts you…she just wanted to keep you close. Sure, you still felt like it was kind of a waste of time, but in those moments, you did have a purpose. Being a muse. Sometimes…you actually felt joy. Not from being carelessly and foolishly devoted to one who couldn’t even bother to acknowledge you, but joy from being regarded. Joy from not getting punished every time you accidentally messed up or moved around.

Oh, speaking of your wings, they’re much more healed now. Not well enough to fly, but enough to where the wounds you got before are practically gone, now replaced by a new set of black and light grey feathers. Hm. So they really did change from being white as snow to grey as ash. It made sense, well, a little.

She loves touching your wings, if you allow her to. She thinks they’re both beautiful and extremely soft, and seeing a slight blush on your face and little widened eyes as she combs her finger through them made her chuckle softly. Despite saying how emotionless and detached you are, you still seemed to process physical touch and feel some kind of emotion. Sablé also got a bit surprised when she tried to pet your feathered back and you had such a surprised and embarrassed reaction.

And yes, she did read about birds soon after. Well, she knew that your back was now a bit of an off-limits area…for now, at least. 😀

—

The day that she kissed you was the day you truly gained a purpose. It was completely normal, you were being told to pose for a painting, but she had to get something. Sablé told you to keep your eyes closed, which you did, and went to grab her stuff. After doing so, she walked up to you and pressed a kiss against your lips, quick and sweet, before telling you to open your eyes.

But honestly? Your eyes were wide open the moment she kissed you, so many thoughts and sudden emotions running through your head. Sablé could see that, but she tried to playfully brush it off. (She knew damn well how you were feeling in that moment)

You couldn’t help but reach your arms out to pull her in, pressing your lips against hers as you hugged her closely. She smiled.

[pretend-erin]

Stray thoughts on Kururi & Mairu

So I am probably one of the very few Kururi & Mairu fans and I want to talk about them. They are, unfortunately, victims of being anime girls from the 2000s - there are a lot of problematic things in drrr that we, as a fandom, should acknowledge and discuss. Simon, Namie, the treatment of characters like Vorona and Anri, I could go on. But right now, I want to talk about the twins.

We don’t get a lot of information on the Orihara family as a whole. All we know is that Izaya was very isolated as a child, and seemed to resent his sisters for being carbon copies of each other. So the girls decided that they would be opposites. They picked their personality traits, splitting them evenly. That’s why they act opposite in the chat room - they do it all on purpose.

I can only speculate here, but it seems like the Orihara parents may not have been around a lot. Actually nobody seems to have parents in drrr. Why was Masaomi able to do all that while he was in middle school???? And the only parents we see are awful - like Shingen?????? He’s our parental figure in this show????Anyway. It’s a pretty common headcanon that Izaya’s parents were not very present, so we can only assume the same for the girls. Izaya, due to his own issues, resented them. All they had was each other. And that is not good!

If you think about it, their codependence is really sad. They’ve had to rely on each other for everything. Even though they purposefully act different from one another, they need the other one in order to feel whole. Izaya said they were basically the same person, and they changed that. But in the process, they cut themselves in half. They’re still operating as one.

When we meet the twins, they seem pretty comfortable around the people Izaya frequently interacts with - mainly Shizuo. He clearly knows them, and knows them well enough to evade them gently. He’s a lot kinder to the girls, even if they get on his nerves.

They quickly befriend the van gang, Mikado and Anri, Shinra and Celty, and Akane. They are present at the contentious Hot Pot Party. And Izaya knows that. He knows his sisters are hanging out with all the people on his chessboard.

Suddenly, they’re part of the chatroom. They’re directly interacting with Aoba (which, are they not kinda parallels to Anri and Masaomi to Aoba’s Mikado??). They have their dojo. Akane Awakusu looks up to them. And even though they get bullied, they have a community to fall back on. They’re not alone anymore.

It kinda seems like everyone who knows Izaya stepped in as big siblings to the twins. They continuously reject him, and he rejects them back. But they have something he doesn’t. Something he’s clearly jealous of.

They’ve never really been alone, they’ve always had each other.

And yeah, the canon portrays that in a super weird way. Sometimes they take the “twisted love” concept too far. But these characters are a lot more interesting than the jokes made at their expense. Sometimes I just pretend the canon isn’t true. I don’t like it! I wish they didn’t do it!!! That’s why I never used to talk about how much I like the twins - people will always fall back on the same joke like it’s 2009. Sometimes you just have to snatch them out of the canon. Take them out of their shitty narrative, they’re mine now >:3

Unfortunately, a lot of the female characters in drrr get ignored or misrepresented by the fandom. Even Celty! Hell, the anime goes out of its way to not make Celty the main character. We get stuck with Mikado for most of the show’s run.

I guess I just find it odd that the fandom doesn’t give the same grace and understanding to the girls as they do the guys. Izaya is everyone’s poor little meow meow (and I’m including myself in that statement) but what about the TWINS???

Idk I think their parallels to Izaya are really interesting, they have everything he doesn’t have. They’re still strange, and may not fit in with their peers, but they’re treated with respect by the very people Izaya focuses most of his time and energy on.

I also think it is so funny that Izaya had two little freak sisters the entire time and we find out about them in an OVA lmao

Like the funniest thing you can do to Izaya is give him annoying little sisters and then not mention them until it’s funny to do so

It’s like when Roger Rabbit can’t take his hand out of the handcuff until it’s funny, it is so funny to introduce these two after you’ve built Izaya up so much. Like he’s just a weird guy with weird sisters. He gets mad when they join his chatroom where he pretends to be a teenage girl. They’re a cringefail family and we simply must respect that.

[solarpunkani]

Sonic the Hedgehog and Solarpunk Ideals

Alright, it's June 23rd which means not only is it Solarpunk Aesthetic Week, but it's also Sonic the Hedgehog's 32nd birthday. Let's all say Happy Birthday Sonic the Hedgehog.

Overall, that means it's time for me to do something I usually don't do on this blog--talk about Sonic the Hedgehog, one of my favorite series of all times. Specifically, how I feel it embodies Solarpunk at least a little bit. Hopefully you'll see where I'm coming from by the end of this.

Real quick though, special shout out to @modern-solarpunk for being my beta reader 100/10 owe you my life.

Alright let’s make one thing clear. I’m a Sonic nerd. I’ve been a Sonic nerd since at least the 5th grade. Sonic the hedgehog is one of My Things. IDK if I’d call it a hyperfixation, but it’s definitely one of My Things, and it’s been one of My Things longer than gardening or even Solarpunking and all the other stuff y’all know me for has been. I am about to talk y’alls ears off. Buckle up.

With that in mind, I’m not going to pretend that the Sonic franchise is a perfect franchise made by perfect people working under a perfect corporation. Even ignoring the timeline disasters, retconning, and rushed projects (*cough cough Sonic 06 and Sonic Boom cough cough*), Sonic the Hedgehog is made by a corporation in a capitalistic world who has done some… iffy things in the past, present, and likely the future. We are, here, today, strictly talking about two things--the creation of Sonic and the creation of Dr. Eggman. There will be a super special third topic I bring up later, but that's gonna be its own post. I’ll bring up a handful of things from the shows, comics, movies, etc. If I finish writing and editing and posting this whole lengthy diatribe and someone ignores this paragraph and brings up some inane unrelated shit that the Big Corporation Guys did That One Time Months/Years Ago I might snap. Yes, corporations are bad. Yes, I like Sonic. Let’s establish that.

Ok let’s actually get started.

Sonic the Hedgehog the Dude, Tiny Rebellions, and Freedom

Alright, so Sonic the Hedgehog is a series of games, movies, comic books, TV shows--it's a whole thing, it's an entire franchise. The basics of what you need to know here is that a little 3’3” superpowered anthropomorphic blue hedgehog dude and his array of equally-animalian and equally-colorful friends are ruining the robotics-based evil world takeover plans of a 6’1” egg-shaped human dude on the regular. Occasionally, there are other villains, and other storylines, and sometimes the motivations change, but that sentence boils down the Sonic the Hedgehog storyline to its base essentials. 

The Sonic franchise was dreamed up in 1990 when SEGA needed a new mascot to compete with Nintendo’s iconic Mario. Personality-wise, he’s said to have been inspired by “a modern sensibility of wanting to get things done right away, righting wrongs as they presented themselves instead of letting them linger.” As we currently know him, with Sonic “What you see is what you get--just a guy who loves adventure.” He’s a free-spirited drifter who goes with the flow, valuing freedom above all else and wanting nothing more than to live by his own rules and whims rather than bowing to the expectations of others. He loves interacting with the many cultures on his planet (which we mostly see in Sonic Unleashed, but still), trying local dishes with friends frequently. Overall, Sonic is driven by a strong sense of justice and fairness, fighting for the ideal of freedom rather than the name of the law--and he always fights for the underdog. He likes to handle things on his own, but he isn’t above looking to his friends for help when needed--and acknowledges their role in his life and achievements regularly (if he can be a bit smug at times). He appreciates scenic views and nature, with a special fondness for places filled with plants--we see him do this lots in the series--and he hates when people destroy it for their own gain. He doesn’t hate cities, though, and finds they have their own beauty.

So what’s Solarpunk about this? In my eyes, a good bit. If you don’t know what Solarpunk is, it’s described on Wikipedia as ‘a literary and artistic movement that envisions and works towards actualizing a sustainable future interconnected with nature and community.” Aesthetically, I like to describe it as a mix between sci-fi and cottagecore, with a particular leaning towards some steampunk and some cyberpunk elements, but in a brighter, cleaner, more hopeful way. It's important to note, however, that Solarpunk is also a practical and political action mindset--as much as Solarpunks dream of a hopeful future and work to visualize it, we also work to learn the concepts and take the actions needed to make it a reality. I’m not going to sit here and pretend that Sonic is super politically revolutionary, I’m here to talk about how Sonic fits into the aesthetics of Solarpunk.

As such, lets get into the point--I feel like Sonic is pretty Solarpunk, personality-wise. He just fits a lot of the core tenants--wants to right wrongs ASAP, whether they’re his wrongs or wrongs of the past. He values freedom, traveling, and beautiful natural places--a big chunk of Solarpunk is learning to appreciate and protect the natural species around you, and plenty of people have dreamed up nomadic Solarpunk societies. Even Sonic living by his own rules instead of bowing to expectations fits in Solarpunk--A Solarpunk Manifesto states that “the ‘punk’ in Solarpunk is about rebellion, counterculture… and enthusiasm. it is about going in a different direction than the mainstream…” People in the Solarpunk movement care deeply about freedom, justice, fairness, and fixing the broken systems we deal with today--and often start the legwork by forming or taking part in community-based movements and initiatives. We lean onto those around us for strength and courage, to work as a group to think of solutions to problems, whether that be something small like trading DIY patch instructions to bigger things like planning and creating community gardens to even sharing news about unionizing and more. There’s acts a Solarpunk can do alone--like guerrilla gardening, or moss graffiti, or drawing and writing concepts of a brighter future--but we all know we’re at our strongest when we’re not just one, but many. 

But one of my biggest arguments to Sonic being Solarpunk actually centers around his nemesis--Doctor Eggman.

Doctor Eggman as the Antithesis of Solarpunk

After all, it’s pretty hard to talk about how a hero of a series is Solarpunk without discussing the people and forces he fights against, and most of the time that’s Doctor Ivo Robotnik--better known to most as Dr. Eggman. He was developed more or less directly alongside Sonic the hedgehog, and as such the notes about his creation not only influence his character, but the character and vibe of most of the franchise so far. So who is Doctor Eggman?

Doctor Eggman is often described as the World’s Vilest Person--he’s evil, mean, cruel-spirited, and a self-proclaimed genius scientist who only really thinks about what he wants and what he needs to do to get it--getting pleasure in crushing anything that gets in his way. His main goal is to establish his Eggman Empire across the entire planet and build his own version of a utopia, Eggmanland--usually taking the form of a polluted, smog-filled city or a robotic theme park. His plans have varied from excavating natural spaces and turning woodland creatures into robotic slaves (Sonic 1, 2, 3), using doomsday devices to threaten nations and blow up the moon (Sonic Adventure 2), tie down planets for his own purposes (Sonic CD, Sonic Colors), or even using cosmic forces beyond his comprehension to flood metropolises or literally rip the planet apart (Sonic Adventure, Sonic Unleashed). In the comics and some shows, he even takes it a step further--a common theme with him is Roboticization, wherein people are forcibly turned from organic beings into robot slaves. Sometimes its a machine fulfilling this sometimes-irreversible process (Archie Comics, Sonic the Hedgehog Cartoon, Sonic Underground), while other times its an all-consuming virus that grows out of his control and turns almost the entire planet into raving robotic zombies (IDW Sonic Comics issues #12-29). He’s fueled by delusions of grandeur, believing that all of the world’s problems would be solved if he specifically were in charge of everyone all the time and had things his way, and makes robotic inventions and weapons to obtain power. He’s overflowing with self-confidence and pride, highlighting his ‘scientific genius’ whenever he can. He’ll leave temporary allies to rot if it gives him a chance to take all the credit and power for  himself, he looks down on everyone else and sees them as insignificant, only interested in what benefits him. Fairness and community? With Doctor Eggman? Forget it, he’ll steal candy from a baby and then turn it into a robot if given the chance. And even with robotic helpers he makes himself, he quickly gets sick of them--Eggman doesn’t do friends. 

I’d compare him to Elon Musk, but at least Dr. Eggman is actually a genius.

A Solarpunk Manifesto was published in 2019, describing Solarpunk as “A movement in speculative fiction, art, fashion, and activism that seeks to answer and embody the question ‘what does a sustainable civilization look like, and how can we get there?’”. Eggmanland is not how we get there--Doctor Eggman is an embodiment of everything the Solarpunk ideology stands against, and not entirely by accident. Here’s a quote from Yuji Naka, one of the creators of Sonic the Hedgehog.

“Robotnik was created to be the opposite of Sonic, and to be the bad guy. At that time, there was opposition between "developers" and "environmentalists", and Robotnik was created to represent machinery and development.”

He represents it pretty well--his common motifs are imperialism and pollution, and his version of a utopia is often reminiscent of pre-EPA photos of US cities. Sometimes its done to a cartoonish level--but the point still stands. Whenever we catch glimpses of Eggman’s ‘Home Bases,’ whether its Scrap Brain Zone in Sonic 1, Chemical Plant in Sonic 2, Metallic Madness in Sonic CD, or elsewhere, we’re always seeing tons of mechanization, smog, pollution, and death robots.

Solarpunks aren’t opposed to technology--not in the slightest. But I feel its safe to say that any Solarpunk would be opposed to the over-industrialized, hyper-mechanized, pollution-riddled empire hellscape that Eggman would call heaven. (And you know damn well he'd be all over those Boston Dynamic robot dogs if he were real). To me, Eggman represents the grim-dark futures that apocalyptic stories tell us we’re barreling towards--the darker, less sunny side of the already dystopian cyberpunk genre. Solarpunk is the sun that burns away at smoggy futures, the light that reveals what we can have instead, the ideas that lead to actions to secure it. Its hope in a bottle--hope that we can enjoy and add to, a dream that we can help make into a reality. The ideals are chock full of resisting the real-life Eggmans who want to send humanity into a nose-dive of mechanization and energy-burning self-destruction for the sake of short-lived profits and smug ego-trips. 

Is Sonic a strictly Solarpunk series? I wouldn’t necessarily say so. But I think if the themes and terms had existed in 1990, it certainly would have been cited as a bit of an inspiration. Whether the Solarpunk community would have been chill with a corporation citing the term as inspiration is a whole other deal.

Stay tuned for this posts' sequel, where I talk about how I feel my favorite game in the series--Sonic Colors--is Solarpunk.

[evertidings]

big brained anon here from a's most recent analysis. i have smth for rylan. rem when i said 'comfortable sharing trauma in jokes rather than in serious situations because they dont wan to face those feelings for a second time', well based on Rylan's lines on the game "if i told you all of my secrets, I wouldnt have any part of me left." my girl/boy/person has trust issues 100%. they think that if they smile, and are able to make jokes about certain situations that make them uncomfortable, they can grow comfortable with the situations, meaning that they can hide who they are from the public, after all "give them enough to form a relationship with you, but never enough to hurt you". They're exhausted by their own game that they're the only ones hurting themselves (self sabotage) at this point, but they're either not self aware enough to acknowledge that or bury their feelings so far down that they dont have to acknowledge being self aware enough. that's why they play the game they do, how far they can flirt with someone or make someone hate them before they pull away, as stated in the book. it's because they dont know how to be in tune with their own emotions, that playing this game with other people's emotions is the only way they can indirectly handle their own. playing this game with emotions is the only way they allow themselves to feel, but it ends in more self sabotage because they bury it again. also, you mentioned they havent let themselves cry in a while. probably because letting themsleves cry means they have to let out all the emotions they've been hiding over the years, but thats so scary for them, why should we confront something when we've been avoiding it for so long? this is so long, and i was gonna try to write more, but idk maybe not. hope im somewhere on the right path lmao

okay this one’s so interesting to me because like, it’s half right and half wrong. and maybe i’m gaslighting myself but i’m kinda happy you didn’t guess it all because it means Rylan’s still kinda a mystery, which, is what i want them to stay as. at least for now.

i’ll say that it’s the ‘playing with emotions’ bit is what’s wrong here. i’m sure it wasn’t your intention but it kinda makes Rylan seem like sadistic haha which, they’re not. they don’t enjoy hurting other people. if anything, they almost take pleasure in hurting themself? or, how do i explain this. you could almost say it’s their version of a test. they like seeing how far they can go as a way to see how far they’ve come in blocking off their emotions. they’re nowhere near emotionally constipated as K, but after being hurt in the past, they perceive caring for people as a crux, so they basically want to see if they’ve ‘improved’ on that front.

but yeah, it’s definitely self-sabotage. and they realize this, but they’ve accepted that’s what they need. they’ve trusted people and been betrayed—it’s not something they want to go through again. and these aren’t, like, small betrayals like hanging out without you. to Rylan, they’re life-changing and they’d rather run than go through that again.

but yes !! if you have more analyses i’d love to hear them <3

[sullustangin]

SWTOR 7.3 Feedback

Non-spoilery stuff first

No technical glitches that I experienced on two playthroughs on Pubside.  Minus one or two moments with Odessen NPCs wandering around, nothing broke the game or immersion.  All the quests worked for credit; I had the weekly for Ruhnuk not work the time round, so this was nice. 

I am aware that there are some financial changes they’re trying to patch back.  Basically, too much is being charged between trades with other players directly and when mailing to alts.  Also!  There is now a 30-day cooldown period between joining a guild and being able to access the guild bank. So get those alts in sooner rather than later, especially if you plan on raiding/doing group stuff with them.

On the Gunslingers and Snipers you now have a 2% per 3 seconds passive heal while in cover  -- level 64 option.  This is a big deal for survivability for these two classes.  I ran dailies and set my companion to DPS.  I had to pause and heal the comp after combat, not myself.   No more glass cannon, but this might be nerfed soon, since it’s a little op.  I’m going to have fun with it while I can.

If you love the Mantellian Privateer or Mira’s Armor from KOTOR II but can’t afford either on Cartel Market, good news:  the Mira set from Bounty Association (the event that comes around every 1-2 months) is now unlockable in collections.  So if you have a Mando char that goes hard on Bounty week, you now have a new cert sink + unlock with Cartel Points for the whole account.  There are some subtle differences in the outfits for the discerning Space Barbie player.

The Date Nights don’t happen in this patch; I would guess it will probably be activated during Night Life in July. Speculation on my part, though

Non-Spoilery Plot Stuff:  A lot of characters that we had the previous option to kill are present in this patch.  This really gives me hope for future content; I previously complained that Bioware was writing to the deadest version of the game (where they assume everyone is dead and only work with Lana).  We got A LOT of coverage with ‘optional’ characters, so this does give me hope for the future writing: assume everyone is alive, and some people get less content.  I’ll talk about what that means later for this patch.

Onward to spoilery stuff.

Torian does get an Alliance alert, which his ba’vodu Eva answered; this is unromanced I feel good about the Torian piece I just reblogged, because it seems consistent with what we see here.  Torian thought the drama over his father was over, the shame was done, the name redeemed -- and there is all is, resurrected from the dead.  Even more content with our neighborhood Mando really does make me want equivalent content with Vette; given that (shitty) decision was almost 7 years ago now and we JUST got a storyline with payoff for that choice, Vette needs some love now, romantic or platonic, beyond Date Night. 

The only downside to letting Torian live at the moment, especially if you’re a smug or bh, is that you lose quality screen time with Akaavi Spar on Ruhnuk. She comes to your rescue in the final fight.  I also feel as if this scene should have been back with the 6.2 content drop, when the banner is first stolen, but it does work here as well, with the burning of it compounding all of Torian’s feelings about his history. 

While Eva does hate that burnt tater thot, the content for Arcann was really good.  I actively wonder if they are pulling things from the aborted third KotXX expansion.  THIS is the character development many of us wanted to see before romancing him: we wanted to see the realization of what he’d done, the desire to fix things, the acknowledgement it may never be enough for some people.  Ding Ding Ding!  I did view both versions of the Darth Nul investigation -- I killed him on DS Eva and let him live on my sunshine and Rainbows LS smug Dyo -- and the version with Arcann in it is so much better.  You also get an additional scene with him; romanced folks get a hug! 

Like the Torian scene, this Arcann development probably should have been earlier in the plotline, but WAAAAY earlier -- like 6+ years.  I think before the romance trigger, most definitely, but at least by the time of Nathema, especially if the Commander takes any of his advice to heart regarding Theron.  I think this falls to fan fic writers to fix, in terms of char dev. 

As I mentioned above, both of these guys are killable.  And they got some great content this patch.  The story feels better with both of them in it. 

As for our dynamic duo, Lana and Theron do show up and play a vocal role with Shae in regard to the interrogation of Malgus.  Theron does get to call Shae out on her working with Malgus to sack Coruscant 2x years ago (I have no idea what year we’re in since COVID screwed everything up).  We also get wonderfully protective partners in Lana and Theron.  Theron makes a comment that the work among other “benefits” keep him young if you’ve romanced him -- poor Lana.  There is noticeable smoldering going on between him and the romanced PC.  Theron does provide significant dialogue content and reaction shots, even though he’s killable.  And of course you get a Theron letter, which alludes to Date Night.  In sum, I don’t think Theron was at all side-lined compared to Lana.

The one weak part of all this is the tenuous connection between the Voss and Malgus’s plans.  In part, it’s becacuse Sana Rae had to be on Voss and decided to kill a few birds with one stone (or one Commander).   It boils down to a vision in which the PC saves the galaxy again.  We do get the tidbit that if we outright kill Malgus, things happen faster, but ‘things’ are ‘inevitable.’  Some of the ‘mundane’ quests verge on the ridiculous, but Star Wars always stomps on character hubris when it can. 

Did I enjoy going back to Voss?  Yup.  Did it make sense, given the nature of the Arcann content?  Yup; if you didn’t spare Arcann, this feels more contrived than if you did, in my opinion.  If I recall correctly, Voss was supposed to be visited in an earlier expansion but that was also canned. 

The transition from Bioware to Broadsword may be bringing old things back to life to ‘finish’ the game -- or start a new beginning.  I remain optimistic.  I will say that the old story of Voss and the new story post Eternal Empire does spin together well.

Good patch, in my opinion, minus the issues with the economic system that are ongoing.

[kenjakusbraincum]

I’m currently crafting an OC that is Sukuna’s wife!

Her name is Furukawa Fumiko, but is referred to as and is called ‘Ayuna’ meaning ‘blood red’ she refers to her love for the color red when she was human and when she became the Queen of Curses; the color for markings, her eyes, hands and feet, and horns.

First thing about her? She is so goddamn autistic. Granted, she was born in the Hein era so her ‘quirks’ were either noted as peculiar or endearing in some shape or form.

- She and Sukuna met when they were still human, and she wasn’t scared of him and while she acknowledged that he was a strong sorcerer, she didn’t overly praise him or cower in fear like most people.

- She has mastered the art of ‘masking’ aka putting on a front that is deep socially acceptable to neurotypical people, she keeps her expression neutral and mostly expresses herself through her eyes and tone.

- Has a logical way of thinking, being strategic with every choice she makes but isn’t completely void of emotions, she just doesn’t let them rule her.

- LOVES her Jūnihitoe, they’re basically her equivalent of our modern day weighted blanket that bring her comfort and security and wears either 12 or 20 layers.

- when she was human she had black hair so long it reaches her calves (kind of hates it and wants to cut it) but it turned white when she changed, along with her eyes that were once green and turned red.

- Hates the tradition of dyeing teeth black (stopped doing it when she left the imperial court and officially joined up with Sukuna).

- She is a Jujutsu sorcerer but I’m still working on what her cursed technique is along with her backstory; but the main premise is that she was born into a noble family and was apart of the imperial court for a long time before finally freeing herself from her personal hell.

- I’m teasing with the idea that Kenjaku is to Fumiko what Yorozu is to Sukuna; a massive pain in the ass. However, with Kenjaku it’s more of a twisted ‘Notice me, Senpai!’ as Kenjaku and Fumiko both were apart of the imperial court as Jujutsu sorcerers but she rarely interacted with her fellow sorcerers as she wasn’t a socially person (and most of them were sexist assholes anyway) but was a genius when it came to understanding and dissecting Jujutsu and could apply it to anything and everything and Kenjaku’s narcissistic ass took that as a (one-sided) slight and challenge.

- Fumiko calls Sukuna, ‘Ryō’ and only calls him ‘Ryōmen’ when he’s either treading on thin ice or pissed her off.

- The women’s yukata that Sukuna is sometimes seen in is one of Fumiko’s.

- Fumiko is a sadist of the psychological and mental variety. She enjoys giving her enemies hope only to viscously snatch it away and see the light leave their eyes.

- In the Heian era, there was a courting process in which the suitor would have a secret sleepover with the person that they were interested in for three nights in a row before leaving at dawn and marriage would be arranged. This is what Sukuna and Fumiko did.

- Sukuna and Fumiko enjoyed taking the piss out of each other, one being amused at the expense (but not total displeasure) of the other like most married couples.

- Uraume is THE fly on the wall when it comes to these two, they have scolding hot tea for days.

- They did have a child, a daughter. In a sort of trade of roles, Sukuna taught their daughter calligraphy and poetry and Fumiko taught her the fundamentals of Jujustu and strategies.

- Regarding their child, don’t piss off her daddy, but definitely don’t mess with her mommy, as the two are brutal and merciless when it comes to any sort of antagonism towards their child.

I love certain elements of this like imagining Uraume having ao much gossip and so little people to share it with is so funny 😭 And Sukuna and her switching roles when it comes to children, love that. Totally one of my hcs for dad Sukuna.

Me personally I'm not a big fan of adding my own ocs to the story, but this is so intricate! I can tell a lot of thought and love went into building this character 😌✨

[phantomoftheorpheum]

i am just…. floored by how the writers misread how the audience would respond to jen x noa x shawn. it honestly felt so rude to make us sit through that mess the entire season but then not even resolve it in a meaningful or satisfying way? criminal. i thought we would get some villainous reveal about jen (not necessarily related to Bloody Rose) and Noa would realize how poor her decision making has been, then she would end on this low note feeling remorseful and guilty. Then we would catch up with Noa in season 3 dealing with the aftermath of it all. we never get any more info on Jen’s mother and what exactly all of this money she’s stealing for is going to. We never see Noa be self-reflective at all. Just a quick little phone call to ask Jen how to hot wire a car :)))))) this is my villain origin story. spoiler: i’m going to be the big bad next season.

You and me both!

I have seen some poor readings of the audience before in my day, but this one is way, way up there. Like... why did they make Shawn so nice until the "he punched the wall" thing? I mean, they made him absurdly nice and supportive all season. I really thought "Okay, this is either to set up a legit villain reveal for him, OR it's to dig the knife in deeper with how horribly Noa's treating him and we're supposed to be upset about it, OR it's so that when Jen is revealed as an antagonist it makes Noa's choices look even worse." But it was just... none of things? They just really didn't see how Shawn being so sweet would make audiences mad at Noa for how she treats him?

My only guess on this one is that they wanted it to be a "Shawn's really sweet, Noa's heart is just elsewhere," kind of scenario, which is FINE in theory, but because she was continuing to use him (quite literally, for money, for sex, etc.) that just feels absolutely heartless. And no one ever calls her out for it! I mean, she calls it cheating a couple of times, but everyone around her is just like "Aw, cute!" In the past, I've felt that they've handled some bad behavior by the girls poorly (like just dropping the "Tabby was filming a locker room which is super illegal and a massively violating thing to do" storyline, but at least she got yelled at by her mother. I think they didn't ever adequately address how bad that was, but at least they didn't have everyone else find out and just be cool with it), but this doesn't even feel like that, it feels like they didn't even want to acknowledge that it WAS bad behavior.

I had scenarios on top of scenarios in my head which I thought could explain this love triangle situation and give plot relevance and everything, but they took none of these paths. In my head, I thought- 1. Jen met BR online (Wes, basically) and was paid to return to Noa's life gather information/steal the phone numbers etc. (we know he was hiring "lost souls" and a girl with a record, a stealing habit, and a mother dealing with addiction could definitely apply!) 1a. She is completely financially motivated (we get a little more explanation of her relationship with her mother and the pressure she is under), and is completely using Noa to get paid. 1b. She was completely financially motivated, but now that she's back with Noa, she regrets her involvement and is trying to cover it up. 2. She is not in any way affiliated with BR, but we get some reveal like "her mom isn't really an addict and she usually does live in that big mansion and she's basically just a rich girl "slumming" it with Noa for fun." 3. She's honest (I mean, except about the stuff we know she lied about), but Shawn is working with BR or has, in some way, betrayed Noa, and they want to flip the situation on its head. 4. They kill Shawn in the finale, so even though Jen is honest, this is an issue for their relationship moving forward because of Noa's guilt about how things played out. 5. BOTH Jen and Shawn are affiliated with BR (perhaps loosely, but they are) and she has changed her mind about wanting to be involved, but since she knows Shawn is, she feels like she needs to stay in the loop to try to protect Noa- she and Shawn are basically holding each other hostage over it, because if she tells Noa he's involved, then he tells Noa about Jen's involvement and ruins their relationship (which she doesn't want to happen), and vice versa. This would explain why she is so hostile to him and is constantly undermining him with Noa, because yeah she wants to be with Noa, but she's also worried about what might happen if Noa trusts Shawn. And there are easily a hundred more scenarios! What we got is just so underwhelming and didn't address any of the questions about her character and also felt absurdly out of touch with the audience base.

I find myself looking at this plot point and it's screen time and thinking "Why, though?"

[13thdoctorposts]

I’m just gonna say it… I really enjoyed Legend of the Sea Devils (LotSD). I wish it was longer, or that it wasn’t the only Sea Devil episode in the 13th era, but I would say they are positive criticisms not negative ones. This is because I enjoyed the Sea Devils, I enjoyed Thasmin, I enjoyed Dans ridiculous pirate costume, probably more then I should have, lol. I like the guest cast, and really enjoyed the look and feel of this episode, who doesn’t love pirate stories? And of course 13s and Yazs costumes, *chefs kiss* I like the whole episode. Maybe I’m far too basic for the scholars of Doctor Who Fandom on Twitter and that’s why I like this episode when dwtwt (Doctor Who Twitter) clearly doesn’t and can’t help but harp on with their negative opinions. I get it some old Sea Devils episode was released today but why can’t you say how much you loved that with out bringing down LotSD?

Maybe someone should let them know 13s era is over and they have 2 shiny new doctors to play with, so just move on from everything you hate about 13 like a normal person would do who didn’t like something. Considering it’s done and none of them have to rewatch any of the episodes again, like maybe let it go so the people who liked it don’t have to avoid posts not even about 13s era because you have to make sure you get in your quota of negative 13 tweets for the day on all posts about Doctor Who.

For me it was a great episode because I felt like I could read between the lines. To me the Doctor was trying to work through her thoughts about Yazs feelings, her feelings and the situation they were in. She was clearly interested, again to me that’s what the flirting, or attempt at flirting, lol, was about, she was exploring her thoughts and feelings. It is hard when your head and your heart want different things. By the time we get to the end she’s decided to follow her head instead of her heart because she knows she doesn’t have time to work through this with Yaz, her time is limited and she’s trying to minimise harm. Sometimes following your head instead of your heart is the most selfless thing you can do. But she still lets Yaz know her feelings which is huge for her because let’s be real she’s told Yaz very little of the things that haunt her. Making this quite a big deal that she not only acknowledges yazs feelings, she acknowledges her own feelings, she acknowledges what she wants, and she acknowledges why they can’t have it.

Now this episode may hit different for me because I come from a time of Xena, Warrior Princess, where everything was subtext, and granted more subtext then we got from Yaz and 13, but being sapphic at that time you had to develop the skill of reading between the lines. I think people are far more use to people being super out and proud in shows these days and so this episode may have been lacking in comparison for some people. But Yaz was 19 when she boarded the TARDIS and she’s been through a lot, her feelings changing from idolising the Doctor to loving the Doctor, it’s not surprising she doesn’t know when that transition actually happen because it probably wasn’t a light bulb moment. And you know what? That’s ok and that’s valid, you don’t have to be out and proud and confident at 19 or 22 or 25 or however old Yaz is at that point she can acknowledge how she feels. So going into the Sea Devils to me were just a fun background story to the main event which was the Doctor working through her feelings and Yaz finding the courage to ask why they couldn’t be together.

And you know what Jodie and Mandip were fantastic in this episode, I was completely sucked in by their performances, the way they looked at each other during that underwater date/non date, they both said so much without a single word. it felt honest and believable, gut wrenching and because I didn’t feel lost in understanding this episode I felt like a lot of things were put into place and resolved. Even if I personally would have like them to have chosen to be together, I get the logic as to why they can’t. It’s heart breaking but when is a Doctor Who love story not heart breaking?

You may have a different opinion of this episode and that’s completely fair, but the people on dwtwt being snarky and crappy just make the dw fandom not a fun place to be because you’re not really welcome there if you don’t have the group think of 13 bad. And since this is a family show where Jodie might be a kids first doctor and they might love her, it’s really a crappy place for a kid to come if the want to be apart of the doctor who fandom.

It’s ok not to like something, but once it’s gone and you have your fav doctor, companion, and show runner coming back why not concentrate on that instead of bringing down something you never have to watch again.

If you have reach the end of my ridiculous verboseness thank you and if you like LotSD don’t listen to the critics cos I don’t think that episode was made for them.

[radkindoffeminist]

I have a lot of issues with your pinned post and if you are willing to have a respectful discussion in dm's or whatever I will gladly explain my rationale on several of the points you made but I think you are really missing the point of inclusive language.

Yes, there are people who attack individual women for calling themselves "pregnant women" instead of "pregnant people." The reality is that there is always someone out there arguing for the stupidest possible version of any belief in existence. But that isn't the point of inclusive language.

The reason it's actually important isn't about validating people, it's about people getting access to the healthcare they need. If you, as a woman, go to a gynecologist looking for help with birth control, or pregnancy, or menstrual issues, etc etc you're not going to be turned away because "you're a woman, not a person." (This is NOT the same as not being taken seriously btw. Before you bring up that argument.) But trans men can and have been turned away from those procedures because "this treatment is for women/you can't possibly have [insert issue here], you're a man." Basically, read Stone Butch Blues I am begging.

Individual women can call themselves women as much as they want, but in medical settings it's important to use inclusive (and accurate!) language. "People who can get pregnant" acknowledges that there are women who are too young or old to get pregnant, or lack certain organs necessary for it, while including people who aren't women that can. And by the way, there are plenty of trans people who do encourage the use of inclusive language when it comes to male healthcare and are frustrated by terms like "womxn" being popularized.

You say you don't hate trans people or want us to come to harm? Help us protect our access to basic healthcare.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Medical inclusivity? Really? What makes you think that just turning from ‘pregnant women’ to ‘pregnant people’ is going to make people recognise that there are female people who don’t identify as women who can still get pregnant? Like, is that really going to be such a big problem in the medical community that actually we need to change all of our language because that alone will make doctors recognise that trans men can also get pregnant?

Moreover, even if I accept the above -that the language needs to change to accommodate trans people, especially as it seems like disagreeing with you about this makes you think that I want trans people to be harmed but I’ll deal with that later- why should it mean that I’m not allowed to be offended by this language change when it forces me to address myself and other women by our organs? This is especially offensive towards women who have a long history of being treated as a walking baby-maker/uterus/vagina. You only picked pregnant person in your example, but there are so many other terms I’ve seen: uterus owner, vagina haver, menstruator, etc. Why is my offence taken as hate on trans people? There are so many other terms which could be used which are significantly less offensive but those ones aren’t chosen, just the ones where we’re forced to refer to ourselves by our organs. Women, AFAB non-binary people, and trans men, for one.

Finally, if the actual argument that you’re going with is because it’s necessary for medical reasons then why is it only women who are targeted with this language? I literally don’t care that some people are encouraging the male equivalents because the reality of the situation is that these terms are directed almost exclusively towards women. There are so many examples of sites which use this language for women while men are still male! It just goes to show how deeply misogynistic this all is and how it was always meant to dehumanise women and separate us from our sex and our sex class.

You’ve basically just said ‘it’s better and more inclusive to trans people so shut up about being offended about it because if you disagree then you want harm to come to trans people’. You’re never going to care about my arguments or my feelings on this subject because all you’re going to do is say that I just hate trans people and want them to be hurt if I disagree. You don’t care about the fact that this language is deeply misogynistic and targets women. You just want us to shut up, accept it, and feel bad for being offended.

[zilabee]

A massive long post only I will care about, the best kind of post \o/ A meme about my fic, the wild and windy night.

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

It was meant to be a super quick fives times h/c fic to get all my favourite h/c scenarios into one fic, and the first chapters I wrote like that, super short easy sketches, and then I tried to write the last one just the same, but I realised something big needed to happen to make them actually see each other... and so I did a Terrible Thing to Paul.  And I did it without thinking, and then I realised that I didn’t know how to fix it, and having John show up and take care of him was basically useless because he wasn’t going to be okay and it was awful.  But I also couldn’t think how to change it, so I wrote eight longer less easy chapters trying to make him be okay, and then it was set in shape and I let it exist. 

2: What scene did you first put down?

The first one. I write things in their order. I mean I leave hard bits badly written and go back to them, but I write them badly before I go forward because otherwise I genuinely don't know what happens next.  How do you know what they’re going to do until they’ve done it?

3: What’s your favourite line of narration?

They are worn and grubby and beloved of the earth.

I don't know why but I really like it. I'm aware there are much more meaningful bits in my fic, and more poignant, but all the same.

I'm also fond of:

He is sitting on the floor and the floor is imaginary.

4: What’s your favourite line of dialogue?

"You're the one that broke it." "Ah, but it's your window." "Ah, but I haven't got any hands, you see."

I think being able to say that is why Paul needed John, more than any of the other things he needed him for.

5: What part was hardest to write?

The bit that I didn't write, where they talk about Klein and Apple and why it had all hurt so much. I stopped writing the fic for about three months when I got to that scene, because I kept writing myself into a corner where they actually had irreconcilable differences and kind of hated each other. Which was not my hope.

You know in the real world where they said they would have phone calls and it was fine until they would talk about business and then they hated each other? That. It made me doubt the existence of love or the possibility of reunion.

In the end I did get something I vaguely liked, about how it had been the first time they wanted different things, and acknowledging the pain of that on both sides, but I had to cut it out because it bogged them down further than I could deal with. I also think not really addressing it is more realistic than finding the words when they were both drunk and exhausted.

Of what stayed in, the hardest part was the ending (penultimate chapter, not the happy add-on) because I knew Paul wasn’t just going to be completely okay within a few weeks or something, and it’s odd writing fic that isn’t slash because the ending is usually just ‘THEY ARE TOGETHER AND HAPPY NOW’ but in this I just got them as close to committed to each other as I could, and was vaguely honest about the fact that they would probably fuck it all up as soon as we left.

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?

It’s longer than all my other fic by about 20000 words.

7: Where did the title come from?

I think subconsciously I might have written the entire fic to fit inside a long and winding road, but honestly it was just a lovely surprise when I went looking for a title and realised that Paul wrote me a song! 

8: Did any real people or events inspire any part of it?

Only the real people and events that are in it.

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

Nope. What is this? Do people write ten versions of their fic and then pick the best?

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?

Because they were in it.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

I like the rhythm of it, and the stillness. I like that it’s finished and whole.  I really like that after George tells Paul the thing about how John is going to fall apart, they NEVER SPEAK AGAIN and Paul doesn’t even really explicitly think about George again.  I kept thinking I should fix that but it’s honestly one of my favourite bits, and closure would ruin it.  The way that Paul's messed up relationship with George isn't even something he thinks of as needing fixing, is so special to me.

12: What do you like least about this fic?

It’s odd because if you’d asked me at the time, I would have had a huge list of things I flat out hated about this fic.  HATED.  I can’t overstate how much I hated the entire thing when I was posting it, like I would post new chapters to tumblr and write huge essays in the tags about how awful it was and how much I hated it and how nobody should look at it - and then I’d delete them all before posting, because I know that’s annoying, and it never sounds sincere, it sounds like you’re begging for reassurance.  And I didn’t want reassurance.  I honestly just wanted to post my fic without anyone looking at it.  Although at the same time I genuinely really appreciated the comments because I could feel like even though it was an awful dreadful thing, people couldn’t tell.  So it was okay.

I think I’d read it and edited it so many times that I was pretty sure it didn’t mean anything at all any more, it had no emotion in it, and I’d cut out any of it that ever made any sense, it all seemed forced and stupid and bare and I couldn’t stand looking at it. I literally posted it because I knew that if I didn’t I would edit it forever, and I never wanted to look at it again.  I clearly remember thinking to myself: ‘well it’s never going to be good, you should just post it and then at least it’ll be dead’. 

But now I read it back and I really love it, I’m kind of proud of it, I think it’s quite sweet.  I guess... there are still small parts where I think the rhythm’s wrong, and I got stuck in John's headspace for a huge chunk towards the end and couldn't find a way around that which still annoys me.  But not enough to care or fix it.

13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

"Bill Haley's whole back catalogue is running through John now"

I don't really listen to music when writing usually, but with this Two Hound Dogs was in my head from the moment they got drunk and it was late and cold and there was this whole feeling of so much weather outside that it almost feels like weather inside, and Bill Haley's music was running through all of it, so I left him in it, because he seemed to want to be there. And I listened to Two Hound Dogs every time I touched it.  It's music from the years when John found Paul, so it fits that way - I'm aware John was not fond of Bill Haley, but I kind of liked that. And I didn't know at the time, but there's also that thing where Paul says he went to see Bill Haley once, and people read it as saying he met John there, so that makes it more nicely meaningful and less random.

14: What happens after the end of this fic?

I think John needs countryside as much as Paul does, so I think he settles into being a part of their life pretty well, and then when it’s too quiet spends weekends with the others or down in London, and eventually he probably comes back from one of those trips with his new fancy posh gallery owner boyfriend in tow, and introduces him at dinner and both John and Linda get to watch Paul navigate John having a boyfriend \o/  Happy days.  And then... I think they’re just sort of happy enough.  Paul would learn to make music using one finger, like overdubbing little bits of piano with each other, and creating acapella albums, and generally finding new ways to do whatever occurred to him.  And then electronic stuff would come in and he’d be all over that. 

15: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

No. Was my big angstfest of platonic soulmate reunion supposed to be secretly educational?

16: What did you learn from writing this fic?

That I should finish editing a fic before I start posting it. And that people who comment on chapter by chapter fic are just insanely kind, like wow.

[cordycepspog]

Hey! Would love to know your thoughts on TLOU 2. And on Abby's character ? I know the game got a lot of mix reviews I personally thought it was really good. I'm so curious on how they are going to do the next season and if they will change anything.

Hi! Just gonna put my response under the cut bc I’m talking about big spoilers for tlou part two and the show and also I tend to ramble about things I’m passionate about so this is kind of long lol 

It’s honestly been a while since I played through part two (I should really do that when I get the time since I just finished part one) but I do remember loving it. It made me cry so much, especially over Joel and Ellie’s relationship and how things ended for them, but I really did like it for what it was; a tragedy. 

I’ve grown to like Abby’s character the more time I spent with her. I understand where the dislike is coming from, but I think the hate surrounding her character got blown waaay out of proportion. And I think a thing a lot of people missed, or refused to acknowledge, was that the way her character was introduced was entirely intentional. It’s supposed to make you conflicted! The same way that Joel’s choice at the end of the first game is supposed to make you conflicted!! That’s the whole point !!!  

You want to think of Abby as the Bad Guy(tm) of the whole story, because we’ve spent so much time with Ellie that we can only see it through Ellie’s perspective. 

And then they make you spend time with Abby, and you learn her story. 

When it boils down to it, Abby and Ellie are almost mirror images of each other. Abby’s father was killed by Joel, she had no one there to fill that role, and so she was consumed by revenge. She got it, and in doing so she set up Ellie for the same fate, a girl who lost her father figure set on revenge. It’s a ruthless cycle that ends up nearly killing them both. 

In their quests they lose those closest to them, both by pushing them away and by the other monster they’ve created. It’s a sad, tragic story, and neither of them get what they wanted in the end. But they can walk away from the cycle, try and find something else to keep going for. Abby choses Lev, and Ellie can choose to go back to Dina and JJ. She just takes a little longer with getting there. 

It’s a heartwrenching tragedy, and that’s the entire point of it. And I think it was done really well, despite other reviews. 

As for the show, I think they are already setting up themes for part two! Ellie’s already shown that affinity for anger and revenge that’s been simmering inside her ever since Riley died. And even with the episode with Henry and Sam, Kathleen’s whole entire speech was basically, “hey, are you sure you were morally correct to damn someone else’s loved one for your loved one who happens to be a kid?” which is pretty on the nose lol. Either way I’m very, very excited (and also full of dread) to see where it goes!