trashcandroid

[trashcandroid]

The two most culturally important things from the past few years are Friday by Rebecca Black because we learned we like hating things more than we like liking them and Cookie Clicker cause we figured out the only reason people play video games is to watch the numbers go up and since then we’ve just been applying those lessons to new and better incarnations of those two things.

[trashcandroid]

>two parts oatmeal one part milk

that shit goes down smooth as silk

>two parts oatmeal one part rice

kinda weird but could be nice

>two parts oatmeal one part stew

now it's getting hard to chew

>two parts oatmeal one part mole

um no thanks i'm really full

>two parts oatmeal one part mouse

what the fuck dude leave my house

>two parts oatmeal one part arm

where'd that come from who'd you harm

>two parts oatmeal one part ned

who is that oh god he's dead

>two parts oatmeal one part gourd

oh fuck yeah i'm back onboard!

[trashcandroid]

One of my favorite hoaxes was in early 1962. There was a musical that debuted in 1961 called Subways are for Sleeping that was doing very poorly. For bizarre reasons (ads were banned in the New York subway system lest people take it as permission to sleep there) and normal (the reviews were poor).

But in 1962 an ad came out full of effusive praise from every prominent theater critic in New York. Every single one. From the Times to the Post, all of the famous theater critics in New York LOVED Subways Are For Sleeping

Except...

One of the papers paid to run this ad noticed something...off. Namely, that he knew Richard Watts the theater critic and he wasn't African-American.

It turns out that the producer of the musical had found seven New Yorkers with the same names as the seven biggest theater critics in New York, since while he couldn't lie and say they liked it, but he could pay for *a* John Chapman or *a* Robert Coleman to see the musical and quote them next to their photo truthfully, bc how many people even knew what the leading theater critics in NYC looked like?

Turns out the producer had wanted to do this for ages, but had to wait for the NYT's critic to retire bc he couldn't find anyone with the same name. Anyway it worked: it went from being about to close, to running another couple hundred shows and winning a Tony

Here's the main source for this, btw

[trashcandroid]

No please, call me Homophobia. Mr. IsBad was my father

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

Make sure you say "I wonder what they're doing right now..." about your comic relief friends every now and then so the episode can cut to their B plot

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

This is an important message that needs to get out to Markiplier!

There is a gang war in LA. The first gang to get to 100 kills, gets to take over that part of the city. You NEED to be careful, Mark. You could be at high risk because of your high status. PLEASE be safe, everyone in or around LA, and please reblog this to get it to the youtubers in LA.

I just worry about their safety.

markiplier stay safe! <3

[trashcandroid]

every band name can be ranked on the 'is this a thing i would want in my house' scale between the police and the violent femmes

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

le miserable. there's just one of him

[trashcandroid]

obsessed with this stupid shirt i found at goodwill the other day

[trashcandroid]

[trashcandroid]

extremely funny to me that harley quinns real name is apparently harleen quinzel, a name that sounds less real that harley quinn. they should do that with more comic characters. batman real name batthew manning. daredevil real name darius devilson. doctor strange real name. well okay that one doesnt count.

[trashcandroid]

You have to admit it's funny