#which i think is a really weird thing to say. bc no one ever said he was only 6 ft 4 inches
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james-spooky · 2 months ago
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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orcelito · 28 days ago
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This morning, my therapist called me to let me know she's setting up her own practice via telehealth (which is what we were using Anyways) & asked me whether I'd want to follow her there. She still has to set stuff up with insurance stuff But her out of pocket stuff is like HALF what I've been paying out of pocket for the company she was in. So I was like, Hell Yeah let's do it
So im gonna keep up with appointments, maybe once a month or so, just so I have the accountability + the ability to ramble about what I've achieved. Bc that's been rly nice for me. I'll have my therapist back!!!! And better than ever, if only because I have to pay so much less for it 😂😂😂
And ALSO, today I put in my course request for the orchestra into the form. So different from just two weeks ago, where I was practically begging to be given a chance to audition. I was sitting in the same spot of the lobby even, but putting in my official orchestra request instead of sending an email as I vibrated in hope and anxiety. I Got It tho. And the class won't even be that late in the day. It's really exciting.
#speculation nation#also general bonding with friends etc etc. very nice.#it's like. my day took a real turn for the better. my gender communication class was covering relationships today#including abusive relationships and how people express love.#the abusive relationships one had me like. actively a little uncomfortable hfkshfkd not like it was BAD bc it's important to teach the signs#but especially when it came to the Volatility sign i was just like. yup. uh huh. yeah. yup. hfksbfmsbc#because it. hit Real close to home for That One shitty relationship way back when#most days i forget i was in an abusive relationship And Then I Remember.........#anyways thankfully we didn't have a discussion over that. but we Did have a discussion over how often we say 'i love you'#professor was asking for a numerical estimate. and some people were saying like 5 or 6 times a day#meanwhile me realizing i only ever really say that to family (human-wise). and i only see or talk to family every so often.#but i say it a lot to my cats. a Lot. theyre my babies. i love them so much.#so i got kind of stressed and overwhelmed thinking about how the most i say is like 'ilu' but only to like one friend and only rarely.#even in romantic relationships i havent said it for the most part. bc it's mostly not been true and i Dont Like To Lie.#so i got to thinking about Why and had a thing of 'am i heartless??' etc etc. but i think i really am emotionally distant#which i think stems from the fact that i dont trust much of Anyone to be in my life long-term besides family#and the only non family i feel comfortable Sometimes saying this kind of thing to is someone ive been friends with for nearly 8 years now.#so i guess i trust that theyll be here longterm. so i feel less anxiety about expressing it.#my friends told me that they see i still care tho in the ways i act and try to take care of them.#so. not heartless. i just struggle with telling people how i feel.#hfmahfmshfms so yeah bit of a weird day but it got better!!!! and now i am. chilling.#gonna play more sims 2. yes.#abuse ment/
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scionshtola · 1 year ago
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i always get annoyed when i’m reading romance novels and it’s like “he was so tall and she was so small. just so tiny and he is so huge. she’s so short and he’s so tall. did you know that he’s over 6’5 and she is so tiny?” but then i look at cori and shtola and i’m like. she is so small and they are so tall 🥹
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pinkseas · 8 months ago
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girls who have all their lives struggled with worthiness and have spent a solid decade convinced that they were undeserving of love fighting desperately to be good enough to be loved in any capacity by anyone at all, constantly failing constantly being left behind, when someone they dearly care for and genuinely trust just Very Casually tells them that they are easy to love
#diary time sorry this is kinda :// im just like. REELING#'damn shocked you into silence' GENUINELY YEAH ���😭😭#like okay. okay. okay. okay. cool. take a belief ive held onto my entire life and flip it on its head with no effort at all. yeah thats fin#it feels SO silly to say im like Shaky bc of this but i have a whole ass complex built around it ive worked thru sm in therapy for years no#but this is one of the only things left that still (consistently) REALLY fucks me up and that i cant get through my head#and not for lack of trying its a work in progress if u will but. god.#genuinely one of the kindest things anyone has ever said to me i think this is going to live with me for the rest of my life#or at least for the next decade#u know when someone says smth or tells u smth and u just Never Forget It like its too meaningful for you to let go of?#whether good or bad?#this is obviously Very Good which is strange in of itself but also holy shit. holy shit. holy shit#and idk i try to surface level be. Like This? silly goofy kind etc? but to hear that from someone who knows me PRETTY damn well#and who i have sm respect for and put sm trust in#like okay. okay. okay .okay. okay. okay. yeah. sure. yeah. mmhmm. alright. cool. okay.yeah. alright.#one million explosions#alyalyoxenfree#cant decide if i want him to see this or not#thats always a weird moment of someone saying something genuinely life-changing and then its like oh shit#do i suddenly dump all this baggage on you for the sole purpose of making you understand how meaningful this is to me#or do i do. Not That. and simply carry on forever changed for the better
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years ago
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...
#weird day. really weird day#i couldnt sleep v well bc my brain was fucked up and i was prob dehydrated so im like extremely out of focus#i did go to the health and wellness center and am now back in therapy which is why my day was so fucking wild. like im too tired so im not#opperating correctly but it was real weird. like last time i got assessed by someone who basically sorted me to a therapist according to my#problems. this time i just kinda stumbled into a 1st session with someone and i dont kno how to feel abt how it went. it was odd#like we didnt go thru like an entire thing of like what r all ur problems? it was more i started talking abt things and he got stuck on#some specific things i said and we talked abt that. which im of 2 minds abt bc he did instantly latch onto the root of some of my issues#which is that i feel fucking dumb all the time bc my brain works a little different but it also wasnt helpful bc like theres a stereotypic#verson of my experience and then theres what i actually went thru and those things dont align in the way he was talking abt it. like i#think were were just talking past eachother a bit. like he wasn't exactly wrong but i do feel a bit like i walked in with an open wound and#and he decided the best course of action was to pat me on the head and tell me im v smart so i walked out still bleeding. but i dont think#its was all bad bc it got under my skin so much. i react like a cat thrown in a bath if u try to call me smart. like fuck off. yes ok im#smart. i have a certified document saying that i have above average intelligence. big fucking whoop. im too fucking dyslexic to do anything#right and my brain is constantly trying to strangle me to death. he called me a gifted kid. fuck u i was too fucking dyslexic to b a gifted#kid. stop talking abt the positive aspects of the compulsive way i live my life when its literally strangling me to death and i want it to#stop. acknowledge my pain old man. also i hate thst therapists hate the word weird. its not a bad word i like that word. i disagree#fundamental with the assertion that its bad. also he pointed out that i talk like a freak. like a person with high intelligence. fuck u i#like words. i will peel my own skin off if u call me smart one more time. lol i was so mad. i argued with him like the whole time. also he#mentioned horoscopes which was weird but whatever. we'll see how the next one goes. i told him to his face i i didnt kno if what we talked#abt was helpful. possibly the rudest ive ever been to a stranger lol. well see how the next session goes. at least it was interesting#god. im fucking so tired and wrung out.#unrelated
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entropyvoid · 13 days ago
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Hey can someone who’s experienced jealousy tell me what it feels like? I’ve always wondered about it and I have trouble wrapping my head around that one
#ch.txt#i don’t tend to understand emotions in general but I’ve at least experienced most of the other ones at least once or twice#even if I can’t really remember or picture what they were like bc I have the emotional object permanenc of an actual rock#merely one of the uniquely impressive feats my autistic as hell brain is capable of#but jealousy seems like a weird one to me bc it’s like. only some people ever seem to get it?#but if I’m right I haven’t been able to identify what quality sets jealous people apart#like is there a specific personality prerequisite#i’d like to know so I can understand my cat Jazz better. he gets jealous of the other cats A LOT#can i tell you guys a thing#sometimes when ppl said good personal news I used to go ‘oooo I’m so jealous’ bc that just sorta seemed like the human thing to say#i stopped doing that after a couple friends gave me weird looks one time and it made me ask myself why the hell i did that#i think i automatically say a lot of things I don’t actually mean w/o thinking bc that just seems like it’s how humans ought to work#based on my observations of everyone who isn’t me anyway#which is annoying bc I’ve always been purposefully resistant to just doing shit bc it’s a social norm if it doesn’t have a good reason#12 y/o me would perhaps strangle current me#although I can think of a few things 12 y/o me hated and always thought I’d be above that I ended up not having a lotta choice in in the end#but that’s besides the point#i’ve been trying to undo that in myself lately#anyway that’s my malfunction can someone tell me about theirs#specifically involving jealousy
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hauntingblue · 3 months ago
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Pluton lore: it can be used to make islands disappear. But why would crocodile want that
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Zoro no learning that a swordsman is worth nothing if he can only attack and can't protect... yeah yeah yeah
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Water luffy is so silly but makes so much sense like this is how we got to gear 5... also robin laughing.... this is where she thought she might join... like at least she will laugh with them. Also crocodile gets mad right after so it works to rile him up too!! Magnificent plan luffy
#omg robin teaseeeeee#sanji telling vivi she will never again fight alone.... omg...#robin laughing at what luffy says... they are already having autism communication... magical#he said you are stupid bc nobody has beaten your ass yet and robin is like yeah.... and also you called me by my name betrayal is imminent#luffy fucking chomps crocodile AJSJAHSKAJAKA if forgot!!!!#porbable news of luffy being defeated and zoro is already training.... yeah...#vivis faith in luffy.... like she doesnt even believe it but its okay.... its the thought that counts#also possible marimo and weird brow introduction here... its like witnessing the first stone being put in the pantheon#the crab is named scissors.... nami named him after her favourite activi- [GUNSHOTS]#also really inch resting... random people that save luffy from death because he is a d: robin. law.#khoza crossing vivi and not hearing her is so heartbreaking akdhakbssk.. the drama#usopp denying luffy is dead saying he is gonna be pirate king and getting the motivation to fight... yesh#exactly.... chopper asking for a doctor... 🚬 comedy#also did sanji evade a swan feet shot bc bon clay said that one is female?? am i getting this right???#sanji making friends with bon clay..... yeah...#zoro fighting mr 1 believing he will be able to cut metal at the end of it.... crazy#OMG CAMIE!!!!! SO SOON???#zoro saying he will not wait for death yeah yeah....#i didnt comment on namis fight bc i was so into it akdjsksj... what can i say she fought for vivi... and also the fight was LONG#not a bad thing but the humor in it... poor girl.... usopp got your ass#imperialism in my one piece?? how a foreign evil infiltrates the state and incites a civil war by infiltrating both sides to ensure mutual#destruction and amidst the chaos extract the state's resources??? its more likely than you think#luffy saving vivi is so :“) also first luffy hug ever??? technically... also we will all hear your voice??? is the translation okay?#namis injured foot being on the panel before vivi sees her.... yeah exactly yeah yeah#vivi is going thru it she has been crying for like 20 minutes poor girl#just realised that robin is kinda oppostie of luffy bc she uses her powers to break peoples bones and she cant do that to luffy ahdkahsk#luffy how are you beating your poor father like that.... goddamn#robin wasnt expecting this??? now what girl?? i think she thinks she might not get to pluton now so she is like fuuck.... why did i save hi#which i do wonder why she saved him did she know about saul being a d? is that in the poneglyphs??#reading one piece
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mywritersmind · 1 month ago
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LOOKING GOOD - LN4
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summary : fewtrell!reader <3 her brother leaves her alone with lando for less than five minutes and she manages to make her childhood friend blush.
listen up : no warnings!! a small blurb to get me back into writing bc i stopped for a day and am now lost.
word count : 634
⋆。‧˚⋆
My brother doesn’t usually annoy me this much, but today he’s really making me angry. He said we would have a brother-sister day (aka we go out for lunch and shit talk while he pays) but I’m standing in a studio instead.
He’s talking to Lando who’s having photos done for a new LN4 drop or something. I check my phone again but am soon looking up again when I realize Lando and Max are now standing in front of me
“I’m gonna go change!” he throws me a hoodie, “I told you i’d get you free shit!” Max walks away as I eye the hoodie.
It’s the same dark green that Lando has on, but mine has a 4 on the chest and various little patches on the arms. I raise a brow at him but he talks first.
“Thought you’d like that one. You look good wearing my number.” I suck in a breath at his flirtatious tone. He’s got a mischievous smirk painted on his face as I rest my hands on the jacket.
“Did you do this to make up for not having the frat boy life you were destined for?” His smile doesn’t falter, just sits down next to me and rests his arm around the back of my chair.
“Sorry I've stolen Max away, today.” I can feel his fingers tap against the chair.
I sigh and shrug, “I get it. Best friend over his loving, stunning, iconic, caring, younger sister.”
Lando laughs a bit, turning his head away. When he does, it makes me realize I haven’t heard him laugh in a while. In fact, I haven’t seen him for months.
His tan is the same which is ridiculous and I fight the urge to ask him if he spray tans. But as my eyes catch on his hair, I swallow.
His curls are defined and cut into a mullet. I’ve always thought I hated them until I saw Lando’s haircut. He’s got his usual bracelets on and when I’m looking at them I get distracted by his hands.
Sometimes it’s really hard to ignore the fact that this man is the same absolute nerd I grew up with. He and my brother used to terrorize me and now Lando’s words are more teasing if anything.
I know he likes the way we talk because everytime I see him, he willingly starts a conversation with me even though I take every chance to bully him.
He blinks and my gaze is pulled back to my lashes, then his eyes. Fuck, those eyes. They’ve always been my favorite part of Lando’s appearance. Is that weird?
You could argue that they’re brown in the dark, but as soon as the sun hits you realize that they’re not specifically one thing.
Right now they look green as ever, the color in his hoodie bringing it out. I don’t realize he’s looking at me until he blinks again.
“Look,” Lando sighs, “If you’re gonna make a jab at how I have my name embroidered on my hoodie-” I let out a small scoff and he stops. “What?”
“I was gonna say you look really good.” I say simply as his jaw basically drops.
I think I've finally found a way to silence Lando Norris, and get his cheeks pink.
Max walks back in, his new Lando swag on display as I stand.
“I’m gonna wait in the car.” I smile at him and as I walk past my brother, I look back to Lando. “Thanks for the hoodie, Norris.”
He’s watching me walk away, a confused look still on his face. I bring my hand up and wiggle my fingers at him. I hear my brother start to yap loudly as the corner of Lando’s mouth quirks.
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bananami · 11 months ago
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STFUATTDLAGG
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character/s: choso kamo x afab!reader
SYNOPSIS: meangirl!reader x loser!choso is a pairing that lives in my head rent free so when you all voted for choso to be the next hot man i wrote for i knew this was what would come out of it so let’s get into it whores
WARNINGS: this is college based bc u know why. 18+, nsfw, mdni, the whole shebang, kiddos avert ur eyes IT'S ALL SMUT / also just be aware i did use fem language for reader. as always, i did not proof read xxx
A/N: delusion is like drugs for simps, and i am the crackhead
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Choso isn't like a nerdy loser, more like he’s just an emo boy, he’s got that alternative look going on and in a school full of preppy rich kids he stands out like a sore thumb. Of course this leads to some not so nice kids being not so nice to him, to which like he literally could not care less. He pays no mind to what anyone thinks of him beyond of course what his brothers think of him.
And as much as people aren’t nice to him, they do not fuck with him directly, lowkey scared of his reactions. Especially following a specfic incident in which someone tried to pick a fight with him. At first he was going to just let it slide but then they said something rude about Yuuji and this man laid them out. People were sent to urgent care and everything. Choso was put on suspension and almost kicked out, but their family friend is a lawyer and threatened to sue the school and anyways (if you know who you know who) so he was allowed back at school and everyone’s a little weary of him. This doesn’t stop the mean comments from coming.
And you. You’re no exception. You made fun of him every chance you got. The way he always did his hair in that weird double bun updo, or how he had his nails painted black, his various piercings and tattoos, the way he dressed so much different, was so much different, than any of the other guys you knew at school.
And you were so disgustingly attracted to him. While everyone would sneer and make fun of him and you played along, in reality you were internally berating yourself.
Choso did his best to ignore you but to be honest in the end you were just too fun to mess with. He thought it was cute how you thought you could hurt his feelings, how you really tried, and didn’t realize that he had a thing for brats and that’s just what you were. Everyone else was too afraid to say it straight to his face ever since the fight except for you.
One time he caught you staring at him and he couldn’t help himself, leaning over with a careless smirk. "If you spent less time staring at me and more time paying attention to the lecture maybe you wouldn’t be failing the class."
"Fuck you, Choso.”
"You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
You hoped he’d mistake your embarrassment for anger. He didn’t. You snapped back, as usual. "Maybe if you didn’t dress like such a freak, you’d actually have some friends.”
"Maybe if you weren’t such a bitch your boyfriends would actually stick around for longer than a few months."
The one stung, and you tried not to let it show. Thrown off your game, all you could bring yourself to reply back was: “don’t call me a bitch.”
He shrugged, as though he were bored with the conversation already. "I never said it was a bad thing, just that you keep dating dudes who can’t handle you."
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
He doesn't answer though, and you spend way too much time thinking about what he could've meant. Was he implying that he could handle you? Was that why he constantly found ways to poke at you? Did he like when you were a brat? Did it matter if he liked it? It led your fantasies down a deep and dark rabbit hole that you spent weeks harping on.
Things get even worse after you realize that Choso might’ve been right about your grades slipping and staring at him in class and whatnot. And (for plot reasons of course) that would mean your professor paired you up with him for the final project so that you’d stand a better chance at passing the class.
Which is how you find yourself standing outside of his apartment door, debating how much you need to actually pass the course for your degree. You kept coming to the same conclusion. You definitely needed to.
"You just gonna stand at my door like a creep or can you move so i can let you inside?” He stood at the top of the staircase up to his apartment, watching you with another bored expression.
You're reaction is second nature. "I’m the creep? How long were you just standing there watching me? Maybe I’d already knocked and you didn’t answer so I was waiting. Let’s get on with it, I don’t need anyone seeing me hanging around-”
"Alright relax, princess. No one’s around to hear you act like you hate me. Come inside and I’ll grab us something to drink.” He opened the door to let you both inside, holding it open for you to enter first.
"First off, I do hate you. And second, how do I know you’re not going to poison me?”
"Don’t worry, I wouldn’t poison you. The plan was going more in the direction of choking.”
"Choked to death? Good to know.”
"You implied killing. All i said was choking.”
"Oh, gross.” You groaned. You pushed away the images that were brought to your mind. Choso's hand around your throat, fingers in your mouth, his breathy whispers telling you what else he'd have you choking on by the end of the night.
It's not too bad for the first few hours. You start out working on the project in the living room, but Choso’s neighbors are loud as all hell and you eventually ask if you guys can move into a room away from that shared wall. And (of course for plot purposes) that would be his bedroom.
"Your bedroom is exactly as I pictured it would be."
"This is the part where I make fun of you for picturing what my bedroom looks like."
"Yeah weird and creepy, just like you.”
"Your insults are getting less and less creative.”
"Yeah well….shut up.”
He’s surprised at that, usually you’d come back at him with something witty and clever and he actually enjoyed it.
It’s quiet and he’s sitting at his desk while you lay casually on his bed when he decides now’s as good a time as ever, and he might never actually get you alone again to say it.
"You ever gonna admit that you find me attractive or keep lying to the both of us?"
You wince. "I don't find you attractive. Stop flattering yourself."
"You flatter me enough with all the staring and drooling you do over me in class."
"You're obsessive," you snap at him.
"At least i can admit it."
You're caught off guard, stuck between wanting to ask what he means and not wanting to give in to the obvious baiting he's doing. When he throws the study material down on to his desk and plops down in front of you on his bed, it seems like he's resigned to not giving you that choice.
"Tell you what, I'll tell you all of the dirty and depraved things I think about on a daily basis, and you can decide after whether you'd like to share those same thoughts of yours with me or not."
"Why would I want to hear any of the thoughts in your head?"
"Because a lot of them revolve directly around you." He's leaned so close you're almost touching one another. Your silence is enough to spur him on. "I think you've never been fucked properly before."
You can't contain the look that falls on your face. "Seriously? This what you think about? My sex life is none of your business, but I'm doing just fine in that department, thank you very much."
He ignores you. "I don't think you've ever been told to shut the fuck up and take it like the good girl I know you can be." That shut you up real quick. Choso is on his knees in front of you, hands cupping around your neck, his thumbs running across your cheeks. "You're whiney little fucking attitude not do it for your boyfriends?" He teased. "They not know how to deal with you when you're being a brat, huh?"
You're head moves without conscious effort, nodding to agree with him.
"You just want some attention, don't you?"
Another nod.
"You want my attention, don't you?"
Hesitation. But you can't help yourself, his presence looming heavy over you, pushing you to admit what you'd kept in the dark for so long.
One of his hands slithers from your throat, down your chest, under the sweats you threw on in a rush to get to his apartment. You're so distracted by his fingers that you don't notice his face moving closer until his mouth is prying yours open. That's all it takes from him to have you stroking your fingers through his hair, pulling it out of the buns they typically are held in.
"Such a little brat." He's hovering over you, pushing your hips into the soft cushion of his bed with his. "Feel how hard it makes me?" He teases as he grinds his hips down, his clothed cock sliding against your center. Your eyes flutter and he grips onto your face with one hand, squeezing firmly. "You're gonna fuck me tonight. Nod if you understand."
You can't believe how quick your head moves up and down. "You're gonna take off those pretty little panties you wore hoping I'd get to see and slide up and down my dick until I tell you to stop. I don't want you cumming until I feel you've begged enough."
It takes no time at all for him to flip the two of you and prop himself up on his forearms. His pants are shimmied off and thrown to his bedroom floor alongside yours.
Your hands are desperate to line him up, anticipation building to have him deep inside of you, but his shoot out to pull them up and place them against his chest. "No, no, no. You don't get me inside you yet, not until you prove to me you deserve it." He urges you along his shaft, flat against his stomach. "That's right, be a good little slut for me and let me feel that pussy slide against my dick."
You watch him from above, his face contorting from concentration to pleasure to near desperation. You've never felt as powerful as you did riding him. Not a single one of your boyfriends ever turning you on as much as Choso was right now. He made you work for it, praising you when you did what he asked, and you chased that praise.
"Shit, look at that baby," he grabbed your hair and yanked your face down to watch yourself slide against him. "Need to feel you squeeze that pussy around me. Fuck, slide me in, slide me in-" his loud groans matched your high pitched sound of relief at having him seated inside you. "Fuck this."
He flipped the two of you back over, gripping each of your legs and forcing them up. "Hold right under your knees for me. Good girl, keep yourself open for me, let me just use you." He fell to his forearms as he plowed into you, giving you no time to get used to any sort of pace.
You tried your best to hold your legs, but you wanted so badly to touch him. One of your hands wandered back up into his lose hair.
He could barely keep his eyes open, mumbling all kinds of truths you were sure he would've kept locked inside had he not been so drunk on the feel of being inside you. "So fucking pretty," he kissed you sloppily, "such a stupid fucking brat, just needed my cock inside you. Feel like heaven, baby. Gonna let me cum inside your little cunt, right? Made me wait so fucking long to have you, I deserve it. Don't I deserve it?"
You can barely form any coherent words, setting for nodding and breathy uh huhs.
"So fucking mean to me, and look how good I'm being to you, huh?" You feel the light slap of his head against your cheek. "Say your sorry, beg me to cum inside your pussy."
You do beg, your apology comes out in between the stuttering and slurring of your words, but you beg and plead with him until he concedes. It his own orgasm that pushes you over, his groans and relentlessness that follow, pushing himself passed the point of no return. You can see the beginning of what looks like tears in his eyes, and he has to force himself to stop, his hips jerking from the overstimulation.
He kisses you ruthlessly, letting his tongue claim your mouth in a manner more harsh than it is anything else. And when he pulls away and his eyes settle back on yours they're equally as harsh.
"No more shitty little boyfriends that can't handle you. I'll handle you. You want my cock, you ask nicely. Understand?"
"Yes," you let your lips peck his, surprising him, "what if I don't wanna be nice about it?"
He smirks, "try it and find out. Now get on your knees and suck my cock like the good girl I know you can be."
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st0ryf1lms · 5 months ago
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home, that's a weird word ➳ ken sato
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pairing: ken sato x reader
word count: 1.5k
genre/warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, undertones of xenophobia, basically how i interpreted the last thing kenji said to ami on their first interview, grammatical errors (most likely), no beta we die like men, personal assistant!reader
synopsis: the word "home" always left a weird taste in kenji's tongue when he said it.
a/n: AAAAAAAA I'VE FINALLY WRITTEN A THOUSAND WORD FIC AFTER 2 YEARS IM SO HAPPY!!! and i'm really hoping u guys like this bc i really am so proud of this sooo enjoyyy!!
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It had been a long day, as far as Kenji is concerned. Way too long for his liking. All the cameras and microphones pointed at his direction, all those flashing lights-- a man could only take a few for so long, and Kenji has had enough of his share for the day. As he gets off his bike, all he can think of is the comfort of his own bed, how his pillow would feel against his head and how the duvets would feel covering his skin.
He opened the door to his house, surprised to see you sitting on the couch with the living room lights turned off. Your back was facing him, and with your laptop's glaring LED screen being the only source of light in the room, all he could see was your crouched silhouette.
"Already settling down, huh, Y/N?" He spoke, breaking the silence in the room. "Oh, Mr. Sato, you're home," you say unfazed, as if the only thing that was powering you right now was your laptop's battery. "Just wanted to stay for a while to catch you so I can brief you for your schedule tomorrow." You stated, closing your laptop and standing up to turn on the lights on the dim setting. Kenji sighed and closed his eyes as he plopped down on the couch in front of you, serving as a signal for you to start.
"Okay, so, first thing in the morning, Mr. Sato, you have baseball practice which Coach Shimura insists you attend, an interview scheduled…" Your voice becomes buzzing in his head as he looks out the window, a view overlooking the city. The sound of laughter and joy drifting out from the street below, making him feel very alone in this somewhat new town. "…Sato. Mr. Sato. Are you even listening to a word I say?" You say exasperatedly, not sure if your asshat of a boss actually understands that you came from a 12-hour flight, too, and want nothing to be in the comfort of a nice and comfortable bed. You follow where his gaze is at, looking out the window where the busy streets of Tokyo are hustling and bustling as the nightlife slowly rises. You look back at your boss, sporting a solemn yet longing look on his face- earning a tilt of confusion from your head.
"Can I ask you a question, Y/N? Off the record, please." He asks, eyes remaining trained on the window. "Have you ever felt like you've never belonged? Like, no matter where you go, no matter who you are, you'll never find yourself home?" He finally looks at you, noticing your once tense figure now replaced with a relaxed yet calculating stance, figuring out what to say to him. The silence feels like forever as he awaits an answer from you, Kenji letting out a sigh as he hangs his head down low.
"Ever since I had moved to LA, I lost all sense of the word 'home.' Hah, even saying it right now leaves a weird taste in my tongue. All those kids back there, they always told me to 'go back home,' and when I did go back to the house where my mom and I lived, she'd always tell me that we were right at home. Now that I'm actually back in my 'homeland', it feels so weird to even call it that now." He blurted out, his previously relaxed figure on the couch is now one of a crouched one, his head still glued facing down on the floor. "In LA, I felt too Japanese to fit in. The culture shock hitting me every single time I try to do something I was used to. Now, here in Japan, I feel too American now to even call myself a local. Even speaking in my own tongue feels weird to my mouth and my throat."
He finally looked up at you and saw a blank yet somehow shocked expression adorning your face. His eyes slightly widened and his breath hitched in his throat as he quickly realized the gravity of his words and who he was speaking to about a sensitive topic. You, on the other hand, was internally slack-jawed. What the helllll, is this really happening???? You rhetorically think to yourself as your boss, The Ken Sato, the egotistical baseball superstar, literally just spilled his guts in front of you, his personal assistant whom he keeps at an arm's length.
"I- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" he stuttered as he racked his brain, trying to make up an excuse for what he said. You still stayed silent and eerily still. "A–are you still there? Hello? Earth to Y/N?" He asked, cautiously waving a hand.
"Yes," you cleared your throat, "yes, Kenji." You say, his contorted face relaxing as he hears his name slip your mouth. You clear your throat once again before starting.
"You know, if I may, I'd like to believe that home is a construct you make and that a place doesn't really define it. Sure, in kindergarten, we get taught that the definition of home is a place where you live in but as we get older, don't some things actually change? And I'd like to say that the word 'home' is one of those things. As a child, we would say home is where our parents live. As teenagers, we'd say home is with our friends as we laugh and joke with them on various different occasions of our lives at school. As adults, I believe we can be left to define 'home' what we fit it deem to our liking. After all, home is where the heart is, am I right?" You ramble on, pacing around the living room as you animatedly explain with your hands as Kenji follows your every move.
Realizing your mouth once again moved with a mind of its own, you straightened up and cleared your throat. "Ahem, sir. Right, well, I better get going. Long day tomorrow." You nervously chuckled, refusing to look your boss whose privacy you've seem to have invaded as you spoke without filter. You tentatively grab your things and slowly head to the front door, feeling your boss' eyes on you follow your every move as if saying you've overstayed your welcome.
As Kenji trains your every movement, he realizes what you're about to do and stands up abruptly from his place in the couch.
"Y/N, wait."
Your hand hovers above the door handle, eyes closed as you brace for the impact of what your boss is about to say. Please don't fire me, please don't fire me, please do-
"Do you mind if you stay the night?" He says and your head snaps back to look at him, as if he'd grown another head.
I- I mean, not like that, b- but, well… Well, you know what I mean." He sheepishly clarifies, his hand bringing up to scratch the nape of his neck. The silence is awkward and deafening, and he was about to open his mouth to take back what he said but you beat him to it.
"Sure. I'll stay the night, Mr. Sato." You face him with a soft smile.
"Please, Y/N, Kenji's fine."
He leads you to the spare bedroom he has in the house and asks Mina to deliver a fresh set of clothes where you'll stay.
"I just want to say thank you, Y/N. I know I don’t say it enough and I'm sorry for that. I appreciate everything you do." He sincerely told you, looking into your eyes with nothing but pure admiration and gratefulness. "It's all in the job, sir." You say before realizing, wincing as the honorific accidentally leaves your mouth. You open the bedroom door before saying,
"Good night, Kenji."
"Good night, Y/N."
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BONUS:
Kenji wakes up to the noise of cooking downstairs, with a pair of voices talking back and forth. He rubs his eyes free of sleep and lifts the duvets off of him, getting up from his bed and out of his room.
The voices become clearer as he goes down the stairs on the way to the kitchen, where he makes out your voice and Mina's, seeming to be guiding you as you follow a recipe she reads out. "Y/N, he's awake." Mina alerts you as you turn to face him.
"Oh, good morning, Mr. Sato. I hope you don’t mind, Mina told me you barely use the kitchen anyway." You nervously chuckle as you focus your attention back on the stove. "Please, Y/N, what did I tell you?" He visibly cranks up at the mention of his last name early in the morning.
"Right, Kenji, I mean." You quickly recall, still stirring the pot. "That smells amazing, what's that?" He says as he walks over you, looking over your shoulder.
"I know it isn't really for breakfast but Mina told me how it was your favorite, so I made curry. Or, at least, attempted to make it." You explain cautiously, slowly looking over to your boss who's currently sporting a look of surprise.
"M-may I?" He gestures to the spoon. You nod and hand it to him, scooting over to give him a taste. His eyes close and you start to feel anxious, building up an excuse in your head to tell him.
"Tastes just like home."
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withleeknow · 6 months ago
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whiskers.
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pairing: minho x reader genre/warnings: established relationship, fluff; reader has whisker dimples bc this is self-indulgent as hell, written in one sitting and v unedited lol it is once again 2am and i am half asleep. the fake cut mimo has on his cheek in the pics is kind of exactly where my whiskers are lmfao word count: 0.6k
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
navigation / masterlist / ko-fi
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"whiskers," minho says, pulling your gaze away from the laptop in front of you.
you roll your eyes half-heartedly, though you do put the device to the side to give minho your undivided attention. he's looking at you expectantly but patiently, like he's just asking you to give him a little love.
this isn't something that you've always liked about yourself, your whisker dimples as the internet has so lovingly deemed them these days. they would come out when you smile, or when your face twists into an unpleasant scowl. as a kid, people often found it odd how you had dimples so high up in your cheeks when others had them around their smile lines. you always felt a little different, a little weird whenever someone pointed this out even if it was only in harmless fun.
when minho first became aware of it, he was absolutely fascinated. he'd made you laugh so hard that you couldn't contain the bright grin that spread across your face as complete and utter joy took over you. you were clutching his arm, giggling at the story he was telling you when the dimples showed themselves, the cute indentations settling on top of your cheeks as if they were the physical manifestation of the happiness you felt inside.
you remember what minho did. he had cupped your face gently in his hands, then traced the soft lines with his fingers as he marveled at you. "you look like a cat," he had said, and you didn't really know what to make of it. it was so early in your relationship that you weren't sure if he was complimenting you or making fun of you like the others had.
but then the stars in his eyes twinkled a little brighter, the delighted quirk of his lips expressing his wonder better than words could. he had kissed you right there, softer and sweeter than he ever did in the short time that you had known each other back then, and you quickly learned that oh, maybe this little detail about yourself that you were embarrassed of your whole life was a good thing after all.
you still don't know the reason minho likes them so much. to you, they've always been something to ignore as best as you can, something to not draw attention to because you don't want people to highlight that maybe you're a little different from everybody else.
even as you sit here, years later with the love of your life who's got a very particular request for you, you're still not entirely sure why he's obsessed with your odd dimples enough to want to see them almost every day. it's a mystery to you and yet, it makes you feel all warm and bubbly inside whenever he sends this simple demand your way.
you adhere to his request nonetheless. when the dimples appear, you watch as a smile blooms on his face, growing bigger and bigger until it makes his eyes crinkle. like an instant boost of serotonin, you think.
minho traces them with gentle fingers, gazing at you in awe as if it's the first time he's seeing you like this. when he leans closer, you can't help but meet him halfway until his lips are tentatively brushing your cheeks. you can't help your own smile either, when it deepens and only accentuates the small moon-shaped dents which he kisses. five times on each side, and then he's peppering kisses all over your face while you laugh and accept the sudden burst of love.
sometimes he calls them whiskers, sometimes he calls them moons.
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 31.05.2024]
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flowersdiceandlove · 2 months ago
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I’m a subscriber of the Luo Binghe has curly/wavy hair and Bingge straitens it bc it’s not the cultural beauty standard and it makes him feel inadequate whereas Bingmei keeps it curly/wavy bc when he was a teen, Shen Qingqiu-Yuan expressed a like for it so he’s comfortable with it even if it’s not the societal standard. In this vein I want to see a Binggeyuan fic where Shen Yuan gets transmigrated as just Some Guy and catches the attention of Bingge (because of course he does. It’s Shen Yuan) and in one of their encounters where Shen Yuan is driving Bingge just a bit insane with his brand of both obliviousness and all-knowingness, Bingge’s hair gets wet due to something Shen Yuan did. Luo Bingge is pissed at getting soaked and glares at Shen Yuan while simultaneously pushing his hair out of his face and drying it with cultivation magic gearing up to bite into Shen Yuan about getting him wet when Shen Yuan gasps and stares at him in awe. Bingge was so caught up in his anger that when he was drying his hair, he forgot to also redo the spell that keeps his hair straight so it’s reverted to it’s natural curly/wavy state. Just as the self-consciousness that he hasn’t felt since he was a teen and being bullied for his hair Qing Jing Peak is setting in, Shen Yuan surprises Bingge once again by making an aborted movement forward and muttering a “beautiful” under his breath. Bingge, with his enhanced hearing, hears it and pauses in his hastily conjured hair straightening spell, stunned. Never in all his many, many years has anyone called his natural hair “beautiful.” (Not that he really lets people even see it like this. Only a very few have seen his hair in it’s natural state.) And Shen Yuan looks so sincere too.
A deep blush starts to rise on Bingge’s cheeks. It is (unfortunately in Bingge’s opinion) something Bingge is getting very acquainted with in Shen Yuan’s presence. It is something that has only happens when Shen Yuan says something absolutely absurd and what should only be said in a groveling type of flattery as if it is just a truth of the universe and completely true. He has not blushed this much since he was a virgin over 200 years ago!! And even then it wasn’t this bad!
Bingge then stutters (actually stutters because by this point, Shen Yuan has already gotten to him even if he’s still in denial) a reply feeling far more flustered than he thinks he has any right to be.
Then Shen Yuan has the gall to say “Ah! Sorry! I forgot. You’re self-conscious about your hair. Do you want me to turn around while you straighten it again?” with wide, caring, and achingly sincere eyes and his face completely open, only wanting Bingge to feel comfortable after suddenly having an insecurity (which he really shouldn’t know about but somehow does, and Bingge will later add it to the list he’s keeping of such instances when he can think properly again) exposed.
Bingge is so stunned by this that he’s unable to respond and so Shen Yuan continues, “…Actually…It’s really nice like this. I mean, of course, it is. It’s you after all. You’d look good with anything. But like this it looks even more lustrous than usual. Like your hair always is so nice, but like this it catches the light more which adds to its dimension… it’s like something out of a shampoo commercial… I wish I had hair this nice. Mine is so flat and dull looking. Just leave it to you to have the best hair ever. It’s so fluffy… like a sheep… Oh! And it’s so soft too! Like a cloud!” Yes he drifted forward and started petting Bingge’s hair without thinking, too caught up in his admiration of it. Bingge is still too stunned to react and is just watching as one of his biggest insecurities is being dismantled by this random guy he found one day who knows far too much and might actually be a god or something considering the extent of his knowledge, how flippant he is about it, and the weird things he says sometimes (what even is a “shampoo commercial?”).
Bingge eventually gets enough thought back in his pretty, flustered, gay head and flees. Very gracefully he would like to be known. Very befitting of Emperor of the Three Realms.
Very.
Very.
Shen Yuan is left to just stand there and wonder if he finally pissed Bingge off so bad that he’s going to get killed soon. Bingge’s face was very red and he seemed so mad that he couldn’t even speak properly in Shen Yuan’s opinion. After thinking it over for a minute he shrugs and thinks it’s fine. At this point, Shen Yuan is pretty sure that Bingge won’t kill him unless he does something truly outrageous and unforgivable. And while petting the (very soft and fluffy) hair of The Luo Bingge, Emperor of the Three Realms, without permission could be considered highly outrageous, it is not actually the most outrageous thing Shen Yuan has done to the man and lived to tell the tale. Not that he’s going to actually tell people about it. He’s not trying to push Bingge’s buttons and get himself killed.
Shen Yuan just shrugs the encounter off as he does so many others, but does file away the memory of how soft, fluffy, beautiful, and just incredible Bingge’s natural hair is.
Bingge is unable to sleep that night, his mind constantly replaying Shen Yuan’s awe and sincerity over one of his greatest insecurities. Not for the first time since meeting Shen Yuan does he feel cracked open and exposed, yet also somehow safe and warm and like he might cry his eyes out but in a good way.
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sweatervest-obsessed · 9 months ago
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okay so i'm thinking post!prison reid and reader break up bc he's not ready to be in a relationship after everything that happened in prison. they just don't get back together bc when spence is finally ready it's been a while and they both think it's too late and no one makes a move and they remain as friends UNTIL jj's love confession brings some feelings back onto the surface - reader finds out about it and (cue jeid and their weird, longing glances🥲) has a whole it's all really over moment and then there's distance between her and spencer until there's a confrontation about it and BAM a love confession and second chances😁😁
THIS IS SUCH A MESS but i hope you get my point</33
Um yeah so, absolutely. Some angst for you indeed. I love a convoluted and angsty fight, especially whenever someone is arguing in circles with someone else because they're both just so passionate but angry, anyways, heheh, enjoy!!
WC: 1.5k
TW: Arguing, mentions of violence, mentions of prison, mentions of guns, honestly if you watched CM then that is your TW.
“I just want to know why you’ve been so distant lately. I mean, this is the first time I’m speaking with you one on one in over a week, and it’s because I manage to catch you in the office at nine fucking pm Y/n.”
"So what do you want me to say, Spence? What could I possibly have to say to you? I'm pretty sure Jennifer said everything there is to say."
This caused Spencer to lose all of the oxygen in his body. It froze up. You weren’t supposed to know what JJ had said, no one was supposed to know what JJ had said. 
You and Spencer were in the bullpen of the BAU. Luckily for both of you, since it was so late, no one else was there. Neither of you were extremely public when it came to your relationship, which meant neither of you would have chosen to have this conversation fight in a public place, but no one else was around.
I want you to say something you're afraid to say. Something you'd never tell anybody. And you better make it good. Cause if it's not, it's going to be the last thing you ever say. What's it gonna be?
“How did you know about that?” He whispered. 
“JJ asked Garcia to go through the footage, apparently she wanted to make sure no one could ever access the audio from it.”
"Y/n I--" Spencer closed his eyes, his jaw set. He didn’t even know what to say at this point. You had both clearly made up your minds about this, yet neither of you wanted to see the carnage, the outcome of it all. So, instead, you chose to stand in the middle of the bullpen, fighting against one another.
Fighting for one another.
"I just don't understand why you're so upset about this."
“Spencer–you didn’t even tell me about it, I had to find out about it from Penelope, and who knows who else she told. You were afraid to tell me, yet that giant genius brain of yours can’t, oh I don't know, comprehend just a teeny tiny little bit why this makes me upset?" For the millionth time this evening, you scoffed. 
Something you would never say aloud, not even to your partner. Your deepest, darkest secret. Impress me, or I'll kill him.
"Y/n--"
Spence, I've always loved you. I was just too scared to say it before, and now things are really just too complicated to say it now. I'm sorry, but you should know.
"Fuck Spencer I have been in love with you since I first fucking joined this team." You gasped out. The air around your head got thinner and felt dizzying like you were floating through the air now that this was off your chest. "And I loved you when you asked me on a date. I loved you through Emily's death. I loved you when you asked me to move in with you. I loved you through when Morgan left the team. I loved you through Hotch leaving. I loved you through fucking Cat Adams. I loved you even after I came home one night and you were making out with her against our fucking door. I loved you through every single case and every single flaw. I loved you when you fucking relapsed a few years ago. I even loved you when you went MIA for weeks and then found out you were in a fucking Prison. And I still fucking love you now. But, instead of being together, you asked for a break."
"That's not fair..." He whispered.
"What? Respecting you and your boundaries? Knowing that you needed time to readjust after you had been released, and believing in your promise that once you felt ready to try a relationship again you'd come to me and talk to me about it? And then watching as you fall for JJ all fucking over again? With your stupid fucking glances. This isn't a goddamn tv show Reid, I can see when you both stare at one another across the room, I can see it."
"We don't.."
"You do. You both do. And then, you tell me that Jennifer fucking Jareau is willing to make her last words the fact that she has always loved you and has always been in love with you, and you---" Your voice froze, the sound cutting out. You looked straight at Spencer, not caring about the tears running down your cheeks. You watched as his hand twitched up. When the two of you were dating, Spencer used to wipe away every single of your tears. But now he wouldn't even lift his hand.
"I--what."
You took another breath, trying to calm down, and really think through your words. "This woman who has been your best friend for over a decade just fucking confessed her love for you, in a life-or-death situation, and you're telling me, that she just fucking made it up, pulled it out of her ass, or at least is telling you that she did and now the two of you are going to act like everything is normal and okay?"
"Y/n..."
"You were in love with her for years Spencer. And now, all of a sudden she confesses her love to you, and that changes nothing?"
"No, Y/n, it doesn't. It changes nothing. Does it hurt a bit? Yes. Does it change the fact that I love you? No." Spencer was trying to keep his voice level, hoping you'll continue to match his volume since he didn't want anyone to potentially stumble by and hear your argument. His hand reached for your wrist, but you couldn't bear to feel his skin against yours.
This caused you to let out a water laugh, tears sliding into your mouth, ugly but pouring down your cheeks. A waterfall of grief in all of its rawest forms.
"You still love me."
"Why-Why is that funny."
"I have been waiting to hear those words since you walked out of that fucking prison and the first time I hear it in years, it's because you're trying to justify loving someone else."
"That's not true."
Make it a million and one, you scoffed.
"I have loved you since the moment you first walked through those doors. You were in a pale blue pair of pants, and a black sweater--I remember it because Emily complimented the pants. I spend my whole life loving you and manage to never fully give you every single piece of love I have because there's simply not enough time in the world. I would kill for you. I would go to prison all over again if it meant you would be okay in this world." Spencer ran a hand through his hair, his voice strained. But his eyes never left yours. "Last week, when that unsub had his gun against your head, I fired before he even spoke, not because I assessed it was the right time or whatever fucking excuse I gave to Emily. I fired that bullet because if you died in front of me, I'd......The only thing I was thinking about the entire fucking time JJ and I were stuck in that room was how the fuck I was going to be able to tell you I love you one last time because I wasn't fucking smart enough to take my chance and say it to you every single day."
Your chest was heaving, but you didn't move towards him. It didn't feel right, it didn't feel real.
Spencer was able to take your hand in his, enclosing it between both of his, trying to get you to look at him. "I should have told you the moment I was ready to try a relationship again, but I thought you...I thought you had moved on because I wasn't worth waiting for."
This caused you to laugh again, eyes red from crying. "Don't fucking start with that shit Spencer.''
"I'm telling the god's honest truth."
"I waited for you throughout all of Prison. I waited for you through Maeve. I am still pathetically standing right fucking in front of you, waiting for you to hopefully realize that you still love me."
He kissed your hand. "And I don't deserve you at all for it."
"Do you still love her?"
"Y/n."
"Answer the question, Spencer. Or I'm done. I-I can't do this any longer, watching you....the way she looks at you just--"
Spencer pulled you into his arms, enclosing your body in his arms and kissing the side of your head. "I have always, and will always, love you Y/n Y/l/n. And I want to spend the rest of our lives proving to you that I would choose you, I want you, over and over again."
“That’s not an answer Spencer.” You whispered, rigid in his arms.
“I-I.” He closed his eyes. “I did. And I still do love her, but not like that. I haven’t been i-in love with her since the moment you walked through those doors.”
Spencer felt the weight of your head against his shoulder as you finally conceded and hugged him back, tightly. “Let's go home.” He muttered into your head, waiting patiently for you to hum in agreement. 
Neither of you moved though. You both stood there, locked eternally in the other’s embrace, enjoying the peace you felt for the moment, even though tomorrow was a new day, where you would have to sort through how you really felt about all of this. 
But tonight, you stood with your arms around your love, forever.
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samandcolbyownme · 5 months ago
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i forgot to reupload this - enjoy again!
Summary: Anon request - "Heey, i hope u're good and i hope u're accepting requests. I'm in love with ur works and i was wondering if u could write a very smutty piece about Sam and the reader being best friends (she's living with snc, bc they've been best friends all their lives). Maybe lately both Sam and the reader start noticing each other a lot more than before, like y/n is studying one night and Sam comes back from his run, they have a late night snack and it's all blushy and cute. But the upcoming days there's a lot of sexual tension between them until Sam just decides to put an end to their friendship to become more. I hope it's ok ♥️" 
Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, unprotected sex, angst, hair pulling, choking, scratching, oral (f rec), fluff with filth 
Word Count: 5.7k | Not Edited Yet 
─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───
You sat on the couch, lap top on your lap as you typed up your paper for school. It was quiet since Sam and Colby went out to meet someone about a possible exploration, so you put your headphones on to drown out the silence. 
You were too zoned out on getting this thing written that you completely missed the text Sam sent which stated that they would be home soon. 
After ten more minutes of typing, you close your lap top and stand up, letting out a scream as they laugh, "Honey, we're home." Colby says with a laugh and you sigh, "I see that." 
Sam smiles at you, and you hated when he did that, mainly because it made you fall more in love with him, and you couldn't do that.
You guys were best friends. 
Emphasis on the friend's part. You knew them, pretty much your whole life, and even though they haven't ever really said it, you knew that it would even be weird to talk about it, or so you thought. 
"How was the meeting thing?" You ask as they walk over towards you. Sam shrugs, "They're going to let us in, it's just a matter of finding out when exactly." He plops down onto the couch, "Get that paper done?" 
You sit back down, opening your computer back up, "Almost. I need like two more paragraphs." 
"What's it on again?" Colby asks turning your computer towards him, "Geoengineering technology? You are way too smart for your own good." 
You laugh and you can see Sam staring at you lovingly but you don't want to get your hopes up, "Yeah, sometimes I wonder if that's why I get headaches, too much knowledge up here." 
Colby laughs, "You know you don't have to go to school right? You can just fully commit to joining the xplr squad." 
You roll your eyes, "We've been friends for how many years? I've been a part of that squad before it was even thought of." 
Sam laughs as Colby nods while laughing, "You got me there. I'll give you that one." You smirk and look over at Sam, "Did you beat your time this morning? I wanted to ask but I had to leave before you got back." 
Sam sighs, "yes and no. I did but not by much, so.." 
"You'll get there. You have plenty of time." You smile at him and stand up, "I have an evening class tonight so I'll see you guys after five or so." You walk up to change, and right before you enter your room, Colby speaks, but it's not as quiet as he thinks, "You gotta tell her, bro."
You perk up, curious as to what they're talking about. 
"There's no way. No, Colby. I can't just spring that on her." Sam argues back and his voice goes quiet, making it hard for you to hear. 
You shake the thoughts out of your head and continue in to get dressed. You throw on a pair of jeans, sneakers, and one of the new hoodies from Sam's collection.
You grab your backpack and head back downstairs, "I'll see you guys later, do you want me to grab dinner on my way back?" 
"Yeah, that'll be good." Colby looks at you and nods, "Get whatever, you know what we get." You smile and nod, "Okay." 
Your eyes meet Sam's and he smiles at you. He loved seeing you in his own merch. You are his favorite model, but you didn't know that, for sure. 
Sam's eyes stay on you as he watches you search for your keys,"by the microwave, y/n." You look over and lo and behold they're there, "Thank you!" 
He yells out a quick, "Welcome!" as you leave the house. You make your way to your car, the thoughts running rabid through your mind, 
He's got a girlfriend and he's going to ask me to move out because he knows I like him and it's weird. 
You get in, sitting there for a moment before starting your car and driving to campus. 
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
"It's not weird at all." Your friend Lacey says leaning back in her chair, "You've been friends for a while, and I always say the friendship stage is the most important thing before dating someone. And you my friend, have it perfect." 
You sigh, "But the way they were talking I just... I feel like he's going to tell me he is talking to someone and he knows I like him and- Gahhhh." You groan quietly and take a deep breath as she leans over, "I've witnessed you and Sam together in a room full of people, and I can tell you that he doesn't look at anybody the way he looks at you." 
"Really?" You ask, her words giving you a little bit of hope and she nods, "Really. And just a little f.y.i, best friends don't look at each other the way you and Sam do." 
You smile slightly as you think about what she said, "I just don't know how to tell him, like.. my anxiety about the friendship ending gets the best of me because I don't want to lose him, and I know him and Colby are a package deal, so I'd lose them both and it just-" 
"Take a breather. Why don't you talk to Colby about it? I'm sure he knows a lot of their end." 
You shake your head, "I couldn't do that. I feel like Sam is the one I need to talk to or not at all.. I just.. I just have to get over myself." 
As your professor starts talking, you keep thinking about everything, but little did you know, Sam and Colby weren't editing videos like you thought, they were having almost the same conversation you and Lacey were having. 
Growing up, the adults would pick on you and Sam for claiming to be just friends, and for a while there, it was really true, but as you got older, the truth was covered up.
Each video you have done with them, the fans have pointed out things about you and Sam. Some would be simple comments, basically what Lacey said, about how you look at each other.
Then others would be making a big deal out of you picking to run to Sam after something scared you during the investigation. Most of the time it's because Sam is right there, you'd run to Colby too if you needed to, but who are you kidding, Sam is your safe place so of course you'll run to him first. 
You never commented back to it, because that would just lead to more confusing things, so you just brush it off most of the time. You've never say anything to Sam about it because you know more than likely already seen them, and if he hasn't said anything, why should you? 
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
You pull your phone out as you walk to your car, texting the group chat, I'm just going to go somewhere close, I have to study for a stupid test tomorrow and I don't want to be up all night. 
You toss your backpack into the passenger seat and get in, reading Colby's reply, that's fine 
Sam replies after, whatever is easiest for you.
You set your phone down and start driving, going where you need to go before heading home. 
You see someone walking towards your car which makes you kind of skeptical about getting out. You reach up to lock your doors until you see the big X on the front of it, letting out a sigh of relief. 
You push open your door and lean your head out, "Don't scare me like that." 
"Like what?" Sam asks as he pushes his hood down, giving you a smile. You get out and stand up, "Walking towards my car when it's almost dark out with your hood up." 
"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I just threw it on, I figured you'd need help carrying stuff in." He takes your backpack from your hands and slings it over his shoulder, "Anything else?"
You shake your head, "No I can get the rest. Thank you." 
He nods, smiling at you for a few seconds before cleaning his throat, "Colby is hungry so we should probably get back in there."
"Of course he is." You laugh, grabbing everything else before walking inside with Sam. You wanted to blurt it out on your way up to the house, but it was like you couldn't speak at all. 
"Finally." Colby teases as you walk in through the door that Sam held open for you, "Thanks." You mumble quietly, going back to normal volume when talking to Colby, "There was a line, I'm sorry." 
He laughs as he points to you, "Don't let it happened again." 
You salute him, "Yes sir, Colby sir." 
"Yeah that's right." He laughs, making you laugh and Sam smiles as he enjoys how comical you and Colby are. 
After dinner, you find yourself on the floor of the living room with your books spread out across the rug, "I'm so screwed." You mumble to yourself, "I should know this." 
"Have trouble there Einstein?" Sam asks as he walks over to the couch and sits down. You look up at him and nod, "This stupid surprise test, that actually isn't a stupid surprise because I knew about it, I just forgot.." you laugh slightly, "Will be the death of me." 
"Just relax, don't overdo it. When was the last time you took a break?" 
Him being so caring makes it harder, no one has ever cared about you the way Sam does, "dinner."
"Y/n that was two hours ago." Sam laughs slightly and sighs, "Take a break, go shower or something. Reset and come back." 
You push yourself off of the floor and sit, "Maybe you're the one who's too smart for their own good." You stand up, stretching and Sam can't help but notice your shirt ride up your stomach a little bit. 
He shakes his head as his voice is low, "If that was the case then.." he trails off as Colby comes down the steps, "you're having a party and didn't invite me?" 
"Yeah, you can help me study. We'll call it a study buddy party." You laugh as Colby stands right back up after sitting down, "No thanks. I'm out." 
You laugh and toss your pen down, "I'm going for a shower anyway. I need a break." You hike it up the stairs and when you look back, Sam looks away from you quickly.
You look away smiling and make your way to the bathroom. 
After a while of being upstairs, finding things to do to avoid going backstairs to your books, you sit down on your bed and lay back. 
You think about what you want to say to Sam, or more of what you need to say. 
You decide you're going to talk to him. Right now. You get up, and walk down the steps to find Colby sitting alone on the couch. 
"Where's Sam?" You look around as you walk over to Colby. He looks up at you, "Said he was going for a run." 
You look at the clock, "it's almost ten pm?" You furrow your brows, Sam usually never goes on late night runs like this, "Is he okay?" 
A smirk grows on Colby's face and you point, "No. no. Don't even." 
He holds his hands up, "My lips are sealed." You roll your eyes and look at your books, hoping to change the subject, "Can you just help me study for a little bit?" 
He sighs and sits up, "Fine." 
An hour goes by and Colby went up to work on some editing, leaving you alone in the kitchen as you worked on making yourself a snack. 
You whispered questions to yourself, answering them, then celebrating when you got the right answer. 
You hear the door open and Sam walks in, freezing slightly as he wasn't expecting you to be up, "Oh, hey." 
"Hey." You smile and turn back towards your book, "How was the run?" 
He shuts the door, shrugging as he sets his phone and headphones on the counter, "Not what I expected really." 
"You want to talk about it?" You go back to putting peanut butter on your banana slices and he walks over, looking over your shoulder as he reaches around and takes one, "i don't know how to talk about it." 
You nod slowly, "I know that feeling." 
He leans against the counter, "We've been friends for a while, y/n." 
You glance over at him, a small smile resting on your lips, "Longer than a while, Sam." He chuckles and nods, "a lot longer than a while." 
You set your knife down, licking your lips as you work your the courage to ask what you want to ask most. 
"What's going on in that head of yours?" Sam asks, reading you like an open book, "You can always talk to me. Or Colby. You know we both care so much about-"
"Do you have a girlfriend?" 
He's taken aback slightly, "What?" He laughs and shakes his head, "No, no. I don't." He looks up at you, crossing his arms, "What makes you think that I have a girlfriend?" 
You turn towards him slightly, "When I went up to get ready before my class.. I heard Colby tell you that you have to tell her, and I didn't.." you trail off, sighing as you close your eyes, "Nevermind." 
Sam stares at you for a few seconds, "Oh.." he chuckles, "That.. yeah no.. that was about a girl who I've been talking to.." he follows up quickly, "..but not in the way you think." 
You nod, your heart sinking slightly, "Ah, I see." 
"Yeah, I have to tell her that I'm not interested in her." Sam tilts his head towards you, "She hasn't gotten the hint yet, and I don't want to be douche about it." 
"Yeah, no of course not." You smirk slightly, "You're only mean to me." He laughs, "Well yeah, but you know what they say.." He sighs and leans over, taking another banana slice, "if a boy picks on a girl?" 
You try to fight a smile, but you fail so you look down, "I've heard that saying before." 
"Then you can probably put two and two together." He smiles at you as you look up at him, "I'm going to bed, we have to meet someone in the morning about the exploration." 
"Maybe don't be up so late."
"Could say the same to you." He winks and jogs up the steps, leaving you to ask yourself, does Sam like me back?
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
Over the next few days, the energy between you and Sam was different. 
You felt drawn to him. 
And he felt drawn to you. 
You looked at him with so much love, and lust. You needed Sam, now. It felt like you were aching for him, but after the kinda, yet not-so cryptic conversation you had with him the one night, you just weren't sure what was in store for you and Sam. 
You've been flirty, almost feeling like you and Sam were closer. You would pass each other and his hand would land somewhere on your body, usually your lower back, and it would send a shock up your spine. 
"Morning." You say walking down the steps, "How'd your investigation go?" 
"Sam, why don't you show her the footage?" Colby says nudging Sam's arm. He takes a deep breath, "I don't think.." 
"You're coming back with us tomorrow night. That's all I'm saying." Colby holds his hands up, shaking his head and you look at Sam, pointing to Colby, "What's he talking about?" 
He licks his lips and sighs with a smirk, "Come on. I'll show you." You nod, following him back up the stairs, "Did it go good?" 
You follow him into his room and sit on his bed as he sits in the chair infront of his computer, "It was a loving spirit, basically, so yeah, it went good." 
You lean forward slightly, eyes on Sam as he clicks on things. A shy smile grows on his face, "I know you're not looking at the computer." 
He slowly turns his head towards you and you keep your eyes on him, "So what if I wasn't?" He cocks his jaw to the right as he smirks, "Never said it was a bad thing." He nods towards the computer, "Come here." 
You stand up, moving over to stand next to him. You press your hand on the desk and lean down slightly, watching as he presses play. 
You can tell he's watching you, but he's waiting for your reaction. 
"Can you repeat that for us please?" Sam asks on the video. After a few moments, you hear your name, clear as day and it wasn't from either one of the guys, "What the hell?" 
You look at Sam and he holds his hand up, "Just wait." 
You look back at the screen, "Something moved in that doorway." You lay your finger on the screen and Sam leans forward, "What? No way." 
"Rewind it... yeah.. there stop." You glance at Sam and nod towards the screen, "Now watch." He presses play, eyes on the screen and he leans back, eyes wide, "How did we miss that?" 
You laugh slightly, "I don't know."
He watches in shock, "Why don't you ever come with us anymore?" 
You hoped this question wouldn't ever be asked. 
"School, you know that Sam." You look at him quickly before reaching for the mouse to hit play, but he stops you, "That's the fake, I don't want to talk about it reason. Tell me the real reason." 
You stand up, letting out a quiet sigh, "I just didn't want to get in the way." He tilts his head, "In the way of what?" 
You shrug, unsure of what to say. 
"Is it the comments? About us, and what people think we are?" Sam crosses his arms and looks up at you. You laugh nervously, giving him a nod, "I guess so." 
He chews on his lip, "Uh huh." He smirks and leans forward, "Well they'll have a hay day with this." He clicks play and pulls you to sit on his thigh. 
You lean forward, listening to Colby speak on the video, "What does y/n have to do with this?" 
".. Sam .. it's time .." 
You furrow your brows, continuing to listen to the video, 
"Sam.. Sam.." you see Colby grab Sam's arm and Sam looks terrified, "Colby.." 
"Sam.. she's a good spirit.. she's made it known she doesn't want to hurt anyone." Colby assures him, "you think she's telling you that you need to tell her?" 
"Tell who what?" Sam shoots back and you look back at him. He's resting his chin on the palm of his hand and you look back at the screen. 
"Y/n.. tell y/n that you like her more than you're letting on, man." Colby's voice is low, almost like they tried to keep it a secret but forgot the camera was rolling? 
"Yeah, yeah. You're probably right, Colby.. I just.. how do they know that?" Sam is confused, "I just don't.. oh my god.."
"... together..." 
"Should y/n and Sam be together?" Colby asks, "If you say yes, make that little light go off for us." Instant light and Sam pauses the video, "Lady Zeroni was known as a match maker back in her day but it turned deadly when a man who wasn't happy with the person she chose for him came back and went on a total murderous rampage throughout the entire house." 
You lean back slightly, "So what you're saying is..." you laugh slightly and rest your hand on the top of his chair, "A ghostly matchmaker is saying we should.. what? Be together?" 
Sam stares up at you, "The whole time, I kept thinking about you. Here alone. Like we don't know what we deal with sometimes and when your name is said, my immediate thought was you in danger and I just.." 
You listen as he trails off, "When I asked about you having a girlfriend, I was scared you were going to ask me to move out because of how I feel about you." 
"Wait.. how do you feel about me?" He tilts his head and tries not to smile and you laugh, putting your hand over his face, "Shut up." 
He takes your hand off his face and holds it gently in yours, playing with the ring that's on your middle finger, "I'm scared as hell to want you.." his voice is quiet, "But here I am.." he looks up at you, "..wanting you anyway." 
You look up at him quickly and your eyes meet his, "I know that feeling, too." He smirks slightly, letting out a breath of air, "We've been friends for a wh-" he stops himself, smiling as he corrects his words, "We've been friends for our whole lives basically, and I just.." 
"Don't want to ruin the friendship?" 
He nods, "Exactly." 
You nod, "Since we're being honest.. I don't know when it happened, but all I know is that you're the first person I run to when I'm scared, happy, sad, anything." You tilt your head, "I mean, when we're doing a video, I run to Colby too, but mainly because he's close, but everything is just.. it's just very different with you." 
"You look at me way different than you look at Colby, I know that for a fact. Actually, Colby was the one who brought it to my attention and I honestly tried pushing it off because I wasn't sure if it was too weird.. like we've known each other for so, so long and we've reached that max level of comfortability with each other... it's just.." 
"It's a real amazing thing, Sam. Not many people, or should I say, many people would kill to have the type of relationship we have." You run your hand through his hair, and he closes his eyes, "Lacey told me that best friends don't look at each other the way we do." 
His eyes flutter open and he smiles, "Colby told me the same thing." 
"And I read the comments on our videos, and I just didn't want you guys to stop getting views or have your name being drug through the mud because we were being too touchy with each other." 
He pulls you closer, "Your safety is my number one priority during those and if me keeping an arm around you while we're in some sketchy ass haunted house makes you feel secure, then I'm going to do it." 
You smile, laying a hand on his chest, "I may have overthought a lot of it." 
He nods, "Oh me too, one hundred percent." 
He runs his bottom lip under his teeth, "I've been waiting years to do this." He slides his hand up, pulling you in so he can press his lips gently to yours. 
Your hand moves to his cheek as you deepen the kiss and he pulls back, scanning over your face as a smile forms on his lips, "Now that I think about it, we'd make a great couple." 
You tilt your head and scrunch up your nose, "You think so?" He pulls you in to kiss you, mumbling against your lips, "Know so." 
You hum against his, "You know what else?" 
"Hmm?" He tilts his head back to rest against his chair, looking up at you as he waits for you to tell him. 
You stand up, his hands still on your hips, "We know everything but one thing about each other."
He raises an eyebrow, "Oh yeah? What's that?" 
You slide your hands to his, "Come on." He stands up, following you over to his bed, instantly picking up what you're laying down for him, "Mm. Are you sure?" 
You turn around, slipping off your sweatshirt, "You have no idea how long I've thought about getting you into bed, Golbach." 
He chuckles as he slips his own shirt off, "I think I have an idea, y/l/n." His hands lay on your hips and he gently sits you down on the bed. 
You lay back as his body moves over top of yours, his hips resting perfectly between your knees. It's like you were made for each other. 
"Tell me what you want, babe." Sam's voice is low as he moves to kiss down your neck, "I'm all yours now." 
You felt a wave of calmness wash over you before you take his hand and slide it to your throat, "Prove it." 
He smirks with a slight hesitation before slowly tightening his grip, "As you wish." His lips crash into yours, kissing every once of skin he can as he makes his way down to the top of your sweats. 
He bites your waist band, looking up at you as he lets them snap against your skin with a smirk following the release, "Can I take these off?" 
"You don't have to ask." You go to sit up and take them off, but he presses a hand flat to your chest, "Let me, do it baby." 
You bite your lip, nodding as you lay back down. 
His hands slide up your clothed thighs, squeezing them before slipping his fingers between the band and your skin, "I want to take my time with this." 
You needed him now, but you understood. 
"Okay, baby." You whisper and smile down at him, lifting your hips as he tugs your sweats down. His lips part slightly, leaning little open kisses up your legs.
He moves back up, hovering over you he grinds against you, "You have no idea how many times I've thought about you.." he leans down and kisses you, "Thought about you." 
You smile, "I relate."
He kisses down your neck, "When you came down wearing one of my hoodies, I wanted to make you so late for class." 
"Would have been worth it." 
He smiles and brushes hair from your face, "Fuck, why'd we wait so long?" You shrug, "Good things take time, Sam." 
He smiles and looks from your lips to your eyes before leaning down to kiss you. He rolls over and you follow, straddling him as your lips reconnect with his. You grind down on him, low moans escaping the seal of your lips on one another.
"Please." You whimper out, "I need you." 
Sam grips your neck, squeezing slowly, "Say it again." 
Your lips form into a smile, and you whimper. "I need you."
He sits up, wrapping his arm around your back, "You're so fucking beautiful." His lips press to yours, moving slowly as he uses his arm to make your body move. 
You wrap your arm around his neck and grind down, moaning his name quietly. He leans back, "lay down for me." 
You move and lay on your back, watching as Sam strips the rest of his clothes off, "Take them off for me." He nods towards your panties that are still on your body and you comply by taking them off and kicking them off the bed. 
"You know, I've also thought about being between those legs.." he gets on his knees, moving towards the middle of the bed by your feet, "multiple times actually.. I was so close to pulling you into the bathroom at that party we went to last week and getting on my knees for you.." his eyes move up your naked body with a smirk, "You looked so fucking good." 
Your heart skips a beat, remembering that, even in your drunken state at the time, Sam wouldn't stop looking at you. 
"You should have." You whisper watching as he kisses up your legs, alternating sides with each kiss, "I wouldn't have minded." 
"Trust me, the next party we go to, I'll make it happen." He winks before dipping his head down and taking your clit between his lips. You let out a gasp, laying a hand on the back of his head, "Sam!" 
Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling slightly as you arch your back, "Oh god, yes." You moan as you grind your hips against his face, whining out how good it feels. 
His tongue sinks into you and you pull his hair, causing him to groan against you. Your other hand searches for something else to grab for leverage. 
His hand throws your leg over his shoulder and your heel instantly digs in to pull him closer, "Fuck, Sam. Sam. I'm so close."
His fingertips dig into your skin, pinning you down as his tongue works its magic inside of you. 
Your eyes roll back and your back lifts up off the bed as he brings you to orgasm, "Shit shit shit." You moan out, "Fuck." 
He pulls away, immediately coming up to kiss you. His cock rubs against your pussy and you reach down, rubbing it up and down your soaked slit a few times before he pushes his hips forward, his cock slipping inside of you for the very first time. 
You both moan, clinging to each other in anyway you can. 
He slowly pulls out and slowly slides back in, taking in the feeling of you, "Fuck, you feel so good." 
"S-Sam.." you press your chest to his, "Fuck me. Please." 
He smirks and tilts his head, watching your face twist with the best pleasure you've ever received, "Fuck, yes." Your nails dig and drag up his back, "I love you." 
Sam leans up, stopping his thrusts as he looks at you. Your face goes shocked, "I-I don't know where that ca-" 
"He smiles and leans down to kiss you, "I love you more than words can say." 
"Then show me." You say quickly before you press your lips to his, "and you don't have to be gentle with me anymore, Sam." 
He smirks and shakes his head, "You're fucking perfect." His lips crash into yours and he pushes his hips all the way into you, moaning lowly against you. 
He slides a hand down your body and hooks his arm under your knee. He pulls it up and the new angle causes you to gasp, "Fuck."
He starts out thrusting slow, but quickly builds up to a faster, punishing pace. He tilts his head back, moaning before looking down at you. 
He sits up slightly and reaches his hand down to cup your chin. His thumb slides across your bottom lip and you part them instantly. 
He watches as you take his thumb between your lips, hallowing out your cheeks as you suck. He groans lowly, "I'm never going to get tired of you in this position."
You smile, teeth gently biting down on his thumb and he takes a sharp breath, "Oh yeah. Never getting tired of you in general." 
He pulls his hand away and lays beside you. You automatically roll over, straddling him to ride him. You tilt your head back with a moan as his cock slides back inside of you. 
His hands immediately grip your hips and help guide you up and down, "Fuck." His eyes are glued to his cock disappearing inside of you, "Doing so good, baby." 
Your eyes light up at the praise and he raises his eyebrows, "Like a little praise do we?" He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, "You're full of surprises aren't you?" 
"You have no idea, Mr. Golbach." 
He sits up slightly, "But I will." 
He bends his legs up and your hands press to his knees as you bounce up and down, "Gonna cum." You whimper out as you slide all the way down and roll your hips, cursing out as you cum.
Sam is in awe of you, his eyes are moving all over your face, your body, "That's it, baby. Good girl." 
Your eyes snap open and you lean down, kissing him as you move your hips up and down, "Only for you." 
"Say.. say it again." He drags his fingers up your leg, "Please." 
"A good girl, but only for you." 
He flips you so you're back to being on your back and he's on top, thrusting into you, "Fucking right." 
You smile, moaning out as you wrap your legs around his waist, "Fuck, fuck yes." 
"M'so close." He mumbles into your neck, "Fuck. You're so good to me." 
His thrusts slow down and turn kinda sloppy as he gets ready to break the grasp of your legs locked around him. 
He pulls out to cum on your stomach and you lay there breathing heavy. He lays beside you, kissing your shoulder for a few seconds before standing up to grab you something to wipe off with. 
He comes back, hanging you a towel with a smile. You take it from him and smirk, "What?" 
"You're my girlfriend." He smiles and bites his lip, quietly celebrating. You tilt your head, "And you're my boyfriend." You smile at him and wipe up, tossing the towel on the floor before being met with a Sam laying his body over yours, "Should we go break the news to Colby?" 
You sigh, "I can picture his celebration dance already." 
Sam peppers kisses all over your face, getting you to laugh, "You're so cheesy." You turn your head, pecking his lips, "One of my favorite things about you."
He smiles and tucks your hair behind your ear, "You.. are my favorite thing about me." 
─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───
Thanks for reading! I love you all so much! 🖤
Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!
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busket · 3 months ago
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What… was the finding dory debacle… ?
omg ok it's a riot. funniest and creepiest thing to ever happen to me on tumblr.
in 2018 after seeing finding dory I made a short little review post. I said it was OK, but some parts could have been better, and modern Pixar movies feel more like kids movies whereas older ones feel more general family oriented
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pretty bland, right? I got some folks agreeing with me, and some folks asking my opinions on other Pixar movies. I specifically remember someone asking me about Inside Out which I ignored since I haven't seen it. then come The Weird Replies.
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very tumblr. feeling a little saucy about this very extreme reaction to me saying I didn't particularly like a children's movie, I made another post and got yet another WILD response from the same person
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then came the asks. again from this same guy. this was a few days or a week or two after the finding dory post so id forgotten about it lol. I think after this point I blocked them bc obviously I would
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then I got some asks from someone different. note how the username is different but still has the same cadence, like they were generated from the same random username generator. older screenshot so they look different, the bottom ask was posted first, chronologically so read bottom to top:
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at this point I'm getting bored of this, but the asks don't stop. in case it wasn't clear, this is the same person, making new sideblogs and sending me CONSTANT messages. I would come home to like, 20 to 50 messages in my inbox, goading me into responding to them and talking to them and to stop ignoring them. now I'm getting creeped out so I just block all that I get. then they start sending me dms on Twitter. ignoring isn't working so finally I respond and say something like "dude you're really creeping me out now. what do you want? what can I do to make you leave me alone?"
their response was that they had sent me the Inside Out ask, and got offended when I didn't answer it. they told me that they just wanted to make a friend online and it was really disheartening to reach out to someone to strike up a conversation and to be ignored. that all they really wanted was to talk to me and be my friend.
I reminded them that they told me I should have gotten mangled and disfigured in the car accident I was in the year prior and that they wished death on my family and why the hell would I ever be friends with them
thankfully they apologized but said "can I just ask that you don't block me anymore I would like another chance to talk to you"
I said no. absolutely not, leave me alone. I blocked them one final time in Twitter and that was the end of it
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amourtoken · 6 months ago
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so I literally cannot stop thinking abt this here u go
god kink Noah and softie Christian reader
I already know I'm going to hell so no need to remind me ik this is filth but that's what's fun abt it also basing the looks of the building off of this big ass church I used to go to and it's very weird and industrial so apologies if it's confusing
*NSFW below the cut, MDNI*
cw: sacrilege lmao, degradation, raw sex, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, Noah kinda thinks he's better than everyone else, maybe bc he thinks he's God idk, corruption, loss of virginity, experienced Noah, dirty talk, slightly public, belly bulge, dacryphilia
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♡ Noah's only at church cause he has to be, otherwise why the fuck would he waste his morning here. He sits through the awful music and wonders how all of these people live such a lie, its pathetic to him. The only thing that makes it bearable is the pretty little thing in the little white sundress that never fails to show up every Sunday.
♡ he thinks you're so cute. Brainwashed, but cute. All he ever thinks abt is how he could desecrate you and how you'd look so much prettier worshipping him.
♡ Noah is damn near your exact opposite, covered in tattoos, always wearing dark colors. He never really talks to anyone either, keeping to himself. You'd say he was miserable if you didn't see his face soften a little every time you catch his eye. You try to make a point and interact with him every chance you get, maybe he's lonely? You can't let that happen. He's the worship leader's son, you'd think he'd be having a better time but who knows what's going through his head.
♡ Noah almost feels bad that he can't keep his thoughts in order when you walk up to him, pretty smile plastered on your face. You're chattering about today's service and he's picturing his hands on your hips, fingers digging into the soft skin while he bucks up into you and gets to hear those pretty little noises he's sure you'd make. All he'd have to do is pull your dress up too, it'd be easy. He's nodding along with your conversation and trying to seem interested but it's getting harder and harder to pretend he's listening.
♡ his eyes drifting to the neckline of your dress which is pretty modest but God he'd be able to pull it down so easy, tease your nipples while you grind yourself on his thigh and whine for him to fill you up. His eyes snap back to your face which is etched with concern.
"Noah, are you feeling alright? You seem out of it."
♡ he could lie, but what's the point. Isn't lying a sin?
"I'm fine. Just thinking about how pretty you'd look split on my cock."
♡ did he really say that??? You weren't sure how to even respond. Or if you should at all. You were flushed down to your chest and Noah admired the pretty pink tinge to your skin. He was almost nervous he'd fucked up but he knew what to say to have you following him like a little sheep. If you can sit through service every week and genuinely believe the shit his father is saying, you'll do anything if it's said in the right tone.
"Bet you've never even fucked before, have you? Saving yourself for marriage and all that bullshit. You know I could make you feel good, you should let me show you."
♡ you're still stunned, standing like a little deer in some headlights. You'd be lying if you said you didn't find Noah attractive but you felt like he wasn't in the cards for you. He's everything you're not, but maybe that's what's so enticing about him. How he talked about your beliefs stung a little but you couldn't help the way your thighs pressed together at the thought of him and his suggestion. He'd never hurt you, right? You can trust him, why would he wrong you?
♡ Noah nodded toward one of the exit doors, turning to leave and hoping you'd follow. You nearly tripped over your own feet trying to catch up with him. Your brain felt fuzzy and you knew whatever he was gonna put you through was horrifically sinful but you can be forgiven for being curious, right? Noah locked the door behind you, leaving you both in an empty stairwell. Hopefully no one tried to interrupt the two of you, because Noah was immediately to work. He walked you backwards until your back was pressed to the concrete wall and he tangled his fingers in your hair, pulling until you whimpered and keened against his hand for some relief.
"The only fucking God in this building is me. I expect you to treat me like such."
"You answer to me, and you follow my fucking directions, yeah? Gonna be a good girl and do what I say?"
♡ you felt your heart race terribly in your chest from how close he was, you felt like a prey animal being stalked by a predator. You really didn't know what to expect, you've never done this before. You shouldn't be doing this at all...what have you gotten yourself into...
♡ Noah surprisingly sinks to his knees in front of you, hands brushing at your knees and sliding up your thighs, hiking up your dress as he goes. His long fingers hooked under the waistband of your panties to tug them down and he threw one of your legs over his shoulder, without warning burying his face in your pussy making you yelp and tangle your fingers in his hair for some balance.
(Something like this yk)
♡ you pulled his hair tightly between your fingers, whining while he lapped at your pussy and groaned against you when you pulled a little too hard. You felt pricks of pins and needles all over your body, it felt like a swarm of butterflies populated your lower stomach. Oh god...one of his hands steadied itself on your thigh but the other slid up to glide between your folds, gathering the slick mess before prodding at your entrance making you squirm. He was right, you hadn't done this before. He wanted you to enjoy yourself though, that's why he was taking the time to stretch you out and make you cum, so you could actually take his cock afterwards.
♡ the fingers at your entrance slid in slowly, stretching you out and scissoring slightly to spread you further. Your legs were shaking and the swarm in your belly felt 100x worse. You were worried you couldn't hold yourself up much longer...Noah pressed his fingers as deep as he could fit them, brushing your cervix and curving up to press right into the most sensitive spot he could. He laughed against your pussy when he felt you clench around his fingers, teeth brushing your clit and making you whimper pathetically above him. He was the one on his knees and you were unraveling. Pitiful.
"You gonna cum for me? Can't let you take this cock till you cum, won't fit."
♡ when he nudges a 3rd finger in you completely come undone, tugging his face closer to you and nearly crying while you grind into him through your orgasm. He speeds his fingers up inside of you until you're squirming and begging him to stop. He withdraws and stands back up, reminding you he towers over you at his full height and he licks your slick off of his fingers right in front of you. You're still panting and your legs feel shaky, this isn't helping.
♡ Noah thinks you look adorable so shaken up, he can't help but admire how your chest is rising so quickly and your face is flushed. He did that to you. He's gonna do so much more too. He backs you into the wall again and runs his hands down your thighs, picking you up and pressing your back into the wall for extra support while your legs wrapped around his waist. You threw your arms around his neck to steady yourself but he wasn't gonna drop you, he could hold you up for hours if he needed to. Again though, he thinks you're adorable and lets you think he could drop you just to get your heart racing again.
♡ he holds you up with one arm while freeing his achingly hard cock with the other. You didn't even really get a chance to see it, but when he drug the tip through the slick mess between your legs you could describe the feeling as dread. He felt huge. Noah leaned his head against your neck, pressing soft kisses up to your ear and nipping at the soft skin.
"Gotta relax for me, promise I'll make you feel so good...trust me"
"Can't wait to feel how tight this pussy is, can't believe I'm your first. Bet I'll be the last too."
"Gonna fucking ruin you for everyone else, gonna be mine forever, yeah?"
"So much for staying pure, hm? All it took was one little comment and here you are letting me fuck you raw in a stairwell. Wonder how your god feels about that."
♡ he'd planned on taking it slow but after sinking in just a few inches he couldn't help himself. He trusted up into you, hilting himself in one move and sank his teeth deep into your shoulder to try and muffle the groan that escaped his chest. He slapped a hand over your mouth as he sank in and thank God he did because the sound you made was nothing short of a scream. Big tears welled in your eyes even after all the work he did to prep you, the stretch of taking his cock felt almost too much. Noah was loving every moment, watching you fall apart for him. He pressed a large hand to your stomach as he started fucking himself into you just to feel how deep he fit in your poor body.
"O-oh god-"
"The only fucking god you should be praying to is me."
♡ your whimpers and moans were nonstop but thankfully muffled against his palm, he didn't want anyone interrupting you. You gripped his cock just fucking right and he doubted he could really last long but he needed to have you unravel on his dick before he could finish. Noah reached up and tugged the front of your dress down, leaning to absolutely cover your chest in hickeys and lick at your overly sensitive nipples, your whines pitched up when his teeth got a little too rough but he couldn't help but admire his work. Your pretty soft skin marred with teeth marks and bruises. There's no way you could walk back out there and have no one notice, everyone would know exactly what you did, and who you did it with. Perfect.
"bet you've been thinking about this just as much as I have, huh bunny? Needed to get fucked, needed to get filled up by some fat cock, yeah? Tell me."
"Your little god was keeping you from this, does he really feel better than me? Wanna hear you say it."
"Gonna cum again for me, bunny? Need to feel you squeeze this cock, you can do it. I got you."
♡ your head fell back against the hard wall as he fucked into you, the coil in your stomach tightened unbearably. Every thrust sank as deep as he could possibly get and made your legs shake in his hold. Noah was chasing your pleasure as much as his own, he loved seeing your pretty little pathetic expressions. He slid a hand between your bodies and barely even had a chance to brush your clit as you came. His arm around you tightened to keep you still as he fucked you through it, tears spilling from your eyes and ruining your pretty makeup.
"S-shit- that's it- good girl, feels good yeah? So good for me-"
"That's it, tell me who's making you feel this good baby say my fuckin' name- n-need to hear it"
♡ his thrusts picked up in intensity, fingers sinking into your hips hard enough to leave Bruises and he sank in impossibly deep as he shuddered through his own end, you whined at the feeling of his hot cum filling you up and the extra dripping out of you making a mess on the floor under you. It took a second for Noah to set you back down on shaky legs, he helped you straighten your dress back out before pulling you in for an uncharacteristically gentle kiss. He felt like he was a little harsh on you but he was happy you actually would do something like this with him finally.
"So pretty...we should do this again sometime, yeah?"
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