#which i know sounds very possible to someone that has not studied these things
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I'm trying not to use "hypothetical" in my peer review of someone's op-ed on nuclear energy but how else do I address: "but how about the elderly person that gets poisoned from growing a carrot in their contaminated ground? Science at this point has not documented the long-term effects of nuclear energy and has left many questions unanswered."
yeah alright. let's go ahead and use the evidence of no evidence ig
#to be clear their implication is that a nuclear reactor that's running perfectly smoothly is contaminating the surrounding area#which i know sounds very possible to someone that has not studied these things#but we literally had a whole lecture in class about nuclear energy that disproves almost everything they wrote here#but uh. not my problem i'll just do my peer review and uh. mention how there's no sources in the second half of a 1270 word op-ed#reminds me of every time someone says 'well we don't know for sure that this DOESN'T cause cancer' like? how do you think science works#you can't disprove shit like that. you can only somewhat prove that shit DOES cause it. and just being alive causes cancer#ik this isn't interesting im just. ranting here
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𝘾𝙧𝙤𝙨𝙨 𝙈𝙮 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩 | 𝙇.𝙃.
Pairing ⇀ Popular Bad Boy! Lee Heeseung x (F) Nerd! Reader
Synopsis ⇀ You were a nerd, always with your nose in a book, acing every test, and keeping a low profile. What comes as a normal life of yours soon takes a turn when your mom finally gets married to a man that you soon found out was Lee Heeseung dad, the school bad boy. Even though Heeseung doesn’t know you, he can’t help but want to corrupt you in every possible way. So what happens when new things start to unfold between you two that he’s never felt before with someone?
Genre ⇀ Smut, Angst
Warnings ⇀ MINORS DNI!!!, Cheating, Karina is Heeseung’s girlfriend, Cursing, Crying, Minor character death, Family issues (on Heeseungs side), Heeseung is mean and toxic to reader a lot of times, Partying, Drinking, Bullying, Jealousy, Kissing, Making out, Biting, Hickeys, Receiving (m&f), Blowjobs, Eating out, Dom! Heeseung x Sub! Reader, Name calling (nerd, princess, etc.), Grinding, Semi public sex, Overstimulation (f), Fingering, Jealous sex, Rough sex, Breeding kink
W.c ⇀ 12.4k (oops)
A/n ⇀ Hi guys :), this fic honestly was fun and long to make. I was gonna make it longer but since I’m making a Sunghoon fic soon Kndecided to just keep it simple (somewhat). If you guys want a request of another fic/drabble I would not mind at all! This fic is based off of this song so take a listen to it! None of these characters act like this in real life! Like, Comment, Reblog, etc.. Not proofread!
Second marriages were a bitch. As much as you loved seeing your mom feeling happy again, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of something missing. Your Happiness. You wouldn’t say you were exactly happy when your mom sat you down at the dining table and saying she was getting married.
You remember how nervous she sounded, her fingers fidgeting in stress. You didn’t know you could make her feel that way over marriage. You’ve always been close to your dad until he died. It was a hard time coping, which is why you bury yourself with books and studies. You were called a nerd by other people though, but that’s not the whole point why you were moving.
Moving into a new house was supposed to be a fresh start for you and your mom. After years of living alone, your mom finally found happiness with a man you didn’t know at all, and their marriage meant a new family dynamic.
You weren’t sure if the mysterious man however had a kid. You were hoping he didn’t, it would mean less problems to you and babysitting when they go out. Only if you knew who would be the person that would be with you and your happy little life from that day on.
“Is he rich?” You asked your mom who was driving you guys to the house. You noticed she was less nervous now, but still had her fidgeting habit going on.
“I didn’t marry him because he is rich sweetie. I married him because I loved him.” You mom replied.
You shrugged your shoulders, “So he is rich.” You mumbled. Your mom didn’t say anything and continued driving with the music low. You didn’t mention anything else after that.
You and your mom drove through the winding roads, the scenery gradually changing from modest homes to grand estates. Your heart raced with anticipation and curiosity.
Once your mom finally came to a stop at a big house, your mouth went agape. The mansion loomed ahead, an architectural masterpiece that seemed to stretch endlessly. The sprawling gardens were meticulously maintained, with fountains and statues dotting the landscape. You couldn't help but gape at the sheer size and opulence of it all.
"Wow," You whispered, more to yourself than anyone else.
Your mom glanced over at you with a knowing smile, "Impressive, isn't it? Mr. Lee has done very well for himself."
As you pulled up to the grand entrance, you couldn’t help but think of the last name. Lee? It’s sounded somewhat familiar to you, but you couldn’t put a finger on it.
As you guys got out the car, Mr. Lee stepped out to greet you, his smile as warm and welcoming as ever, "Welcome! I hope the drive wasn't too tiring," He said. He went over to your mom and gave her a quick peck to the lips. You mentally gag at the way they were already being loved dovey.
He then went towards you, giving you a quick handshake that you appreciated before he ushered you both inside.
The interior was just as breathtaking as the exterior, with high ceilings, elegant chandeliers, and art pieces that looked like they belonged in a museum. You tried to take it all in, but it was almost too much.
“This place is amazing," you said, still in awe. He chuckled softly, a hint of pride in his eyes.
"I'm glad you like it. Come on, let me show you around." He insisted. As you followed him through the grand halls and lavish rooms, you couldn't help but feel a little overwhelmed. It wasn’t something you were used too.
You were used to your cozy house that had a tiny garden on one side of your front yard, the claustrophobic hallway you used to run in when you were little. The small living room that only fitted up to five people. Thinking about your old house already felt nostalgic. Walking through this though, you didn’t know if you were gonna get used to it.
Mr. Lee finally came to a halt at the stairs and stared over at you, “The maid can show you your room. She knows where it’s at.”
You noticed a middle aged woman next to Mr. Lee smiling at you. You gave him a curt nod before following the maid upstairs. As you walked in the halls with the maid you couldn’t help but stare at the photos hung up.
You didn’t see any photos of a women or a kid anywhere with Mr. Lee, so maybe you really were gonna be the only child. Some part of that made you feel giddy. The maid finally stops at a door and opens it. You went inside in awe. Your room was beautiful to say the least.
The room was spacious, with high ceilings and large windows that let in streams of natural light. The walls were painted a soft pastel color, giving the room a serene and welcoming feel. A plush, king-sized bed sat in the center, adorned with fluffy pillows and a cozy duvet.
To one side of the room, there was a stylish desk with a comfortable chair, perfect for studying or writing. Shelves lined the walls, ready to be filled with your favorite books and trinkets. A beautiful vanity stood in one corner, complete with a large mirror and ample storage for all your beauty essentials.
The best part, however, was the view. Walking over to the windows, you pulled back the curtains and gasped. The room overlooked a stunning garden, filled with vibrant flowers and lush greenery. You could already imagine spending hours sitting by the window, enjoying the peaceful scenery.
You couldn't help but smile as you took it all in. This room was everything you had ever dreamed of and more. It was your own little sanctuary, a place where you could relax, unwind, and be yourself.
You turned to look over at the maid who was still smiling, “Beautiful isn’t it? It was my idea since I’m the only women in this house.” The maid chimed.
“It’s very beautiful. Thank you.” You responded. She gave you chuckle and a nod before slowly shutting the door, leaving you alone in the room.
As you started to unpack your belongings and make the room your own, you felt a sense of contentment wash over you. This was your new home, and you couldn't wait to create beautiful memories here.
The sun was setting when you finally finished unpacking a few boxes. You let out a sigh and wiped your sweat off your forehead. You checked the time and saw that it was almost time for you to head to sleep.
As you were about to move a box, you suddenly felt the random urge to use the restroom, “Now that I thought about it I haven’t you used the restroom all day.” You murmured to yourself. You opened your bedroom door and stepped out.
You wandered through the unfamiliar hallways of Mr. Lee’s mansion, trying to remember the directions he had given you to the bathroom. Every door looked the same, and you were starting to feel a bit lost.
Pushing open yet another door, you suddenly froze. There, in the middle of the room, stood a boy you knew all too well. Lee Heeseung, shirtless with only a towel wrapped around him. It seemed like he just got out of the shower since his hair was still wet. His eyes locked onto yours, and you felt your face heat up in embarrassment.
"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" You blurted out, quickly averting your gaze, "I was just looking for the bathroom.”
Heeseung's expression shifted to one of annoyance, "Do you always barge into rooms without knocking?" He snapped, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
"I-I didn't mean to," You stammered, feeling even more flustered. "I just got lost."
He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, making his muscles even more prominent, "Typical. Can't even follow simple directions from my dad."
You felt a mix of embarrassment and irritation at his rude comments, "Look, I said I was sorry. It was an accident. A-And your dad didn’t give me any directions!”
Heeseung scoffed, a scowl on his lips, "Whatever. Just get out of here."
You quickly backed out of the room, closing the door behind you. As you walked away, you couldn't help but feel a strange mix of emotions. Angry, embarrassed, upset, and flustered? You groaned as you entered your room again and slammed it shut. You plopped on your bed.
The thought suddenly came to you. Lee Heeseung owns this house too, and you don’t think he’s gonna be nice to you anytime soon. You sighed and rolled on your bed. You were just hoping tomorrow won’t go bad. And ignoring the fact that you still had to use the restroom.
The next morning, you groggily made your way down to the kitchen, still rubbing the sleep from your eyes. As you rounded the corner, you froze. There, standing by the kitchen island, was Heeseung, chatting casually with your mom and his dad. Your mom noticed you first and smiled warmly.
"Good morning, sweetie! Come here, I want you to meet someone," She said, beckoning you over. You walked over, feeling a bit nervous under Heeseung's gaze.
"This is Heeseung," Your mom introduced, "Mr. Lee son."
Heeseung smirked, looking you up and down. "Oh, so you're the one who lives here? I was wondering why the house felt so... ordinary."
You felt your face heat up with anger. He met you yesterday and now he’s gonna act like he doesn’t know you? The audacity! You forced a smile and replied, "Nice to meet you too, Heeseung."
Your mom looked between the two of you, clearly sensing the tension. "Well, I'm sure you'll get along just fine once you get to know each other," She said, trying to lighten the mood.
You shot Heeseung one last glare before turning on your heel and heading back to your room. You rather eat breakfast at school than in front of him.
You adjusted your glasses and gave yourself one last look in the mirror before grabbing your backpack. Today was going to be another long day at school, but you were ready for it. As you reached for the doorknob, the door swung open, and you found yourself face to face with Heeseung.
Heeseung leaned against the doorframe with a smirk playing on his lips, "Hey, nerd," He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
You sighed, already feeling the tension, "What do you want, Heeseung?"
He stepped closer, his eyes narrowing. "Just a little reminder," He said, his tone turning serious, "When we're at school, don't act like we live together. In fact, don't act like you even know me."
You felt a pang of hurt but masked it with a cool expression, "Don't worry, Heeseung. I have no intention of ruining your reputation."
Heeseung's smirk returned, "Good. Just keep to yourself, and we'll be fine."
With that, he stepped aside, letting you pass. You walked down the hallway, feeling a mix of emotions. Living with Heeseung was already challenging, but pretending like you didn't know each other at school was going to be even harder.
As you walked out the door, you couldn't help but wonder why he cared so much about what others thought. But one thing was clear: you were determined to survive this, no matter how difficult Heeseung made it.
Classes slowly came along, you hated how tired you already were. But one thing for sure is that it was the walking this morning. You had to walk to school while Heeseung just drove right past you with his expensive car, not even offering to ask if you wanted a ride to the same damn school.
When it finally came to lunch you decided to go to the library, a place where you could immerse yourself in books and escape the chaos of high school life.
You were hunched over a thick biology textbook, diligently taking notes when you heard the familiar sound of giggles and whispers. You tried to ignore it, but the voices grew louder until they were impossible to tune out.
"Look at her, always with her nose in a book," One of the girls sneered. "Does she think she’s better than us?"
You kept your eyes on your notes, hoping they would get bored and leave. But they didn’t.
"Hey, nerd," Another girl said, leaning over your table and blocking your view, "Do you even have a life outside of studying?"
You swallowed hard, trying to keep your composure, “I’m just trying to study. Can you please leave me alone?"
The girls laughed, and one of them snatched your notebook, “Oh, look at this! She’s taking notes like a good little student."
You reached out to grab your notebook back, but they held it out of reach, teasing you. Just then, you saw Heeseung walk past the library entrance. Your heart leaped with a strange mix of hope and anxiety. Surely, he would help you. After all, you shared a house, even if he pretended you didn’t exist at school.
"Heeseung!" you called out, your voice wavering slightly.
Heeseung paused for a moment, his eyes meeting yours. But instead of coming to your aid, he simply looked away and continued walking, as if you were invisible.
The girls burst into laughter again, "Even Heeseung doesn’t care about you. How pathetic."
You felt a lump form in your throat, but you refused to cry in front of them. Summoning all your strength, you snatched your notebook back and gathered your things, leaving the library as quickly as you could.
The rest of the day passed in a blur. You couldn’t focus in class, your mind replaying the humiliating scene over and over. When the final bell rang, you headed home, determined to confront Heeseung.
You found him in the kitchen, rummaging through the fridge. "Heeseung, we need to talk," You said, your voice firm.
He glanced at you, raising an eyebrow, “What’s up, nerd?"
You took a deep breath, "Why didn’t you help me today? You saw those girls making fun of me, and you just walked away."
Heeseung shrugged, closing the fridge door, "Not my problem."
Your frustration boiled over, "How can you say that? We live together, Heeseung. You could have at least said something to them."
Heeseung leaned against the counter, crossing his arms, "Look, what happens at school stays at school. I’m not your babysitter. Deal with your own problems."
You stared at him, disbelief and hurt washing over you, "Is that really how you feel? That I’m just a problem?"
Heeseung’s expression softened for a brief moment, but he quickly masked it with indifference, "Yeah, pretty much."
You felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes, but you refused to let them fall, "Fine. If that’s how it is, then don’t expect anything from me either."
With that, you turned and walked away, leaving Heeseung standing in the kitchen. As you retreated to your room, you couldn’t shake the feeling of betrayal.
You had always known Heeseung was a popular person but also bad at the same time, for his rebellious nature, skipping classes, and getting into trouble, but you had hoped there was more to him. Today, he had shown you exactly who he was, and it hurt more than you wanted to admit.
You were glad tomorrow was the weekend which meant you can just sleep all the embarrassment away from today. You quickly changed and went right to sleep, not even bothering to take off your glasses.
The morning sunlight gently filtered through the curtains, casting a warm glow across the room. You stirred awake, feeling unusually refreshed. As you reached for your glasses, you noticed they were perfectly set on the nightstand. Confused, you distinctly remembered falling asleep with them on.
You slipped on your glasses and made your way downstairs, the aroma of breakfast guiding you. Entering the kitchen, you saw your mom chatting with Mr. Lee, but there was no sign of Heeseung.
“Good morning, sweetheart," Your mom greeted you with a smile.
“Morning, Mom," You replied, still puzzled, "Did you take off my glasses last night?"
She shook her head, looking just as confused, “No, I didn't. Maybe Heeseung did before he left with his friends?"
Your eyebrows furrowed more. Heeseung came into my room? You shook your head and gave your mom a tight smile. Whatever she was thinking had to be wrong. Not after what happened last night.
Your mom then got up and exscused herself to the restroom. You sat at the kitchen table, enjoying the breakfast your mom had prepared. Mr. Lee joined you, sipping his coffee and looking thoughtful.
"Did Heeseung ever get a chance to talk to you?" he asked casually.
You hesitated for a moment, the best you could do is lie after anything that’s happening between you, "No, we didn't have time to talk."
Heeseung's dad sighed, shaking his head. "That boy... He never wants to talk to anyone aside from me and his close friends. It's like he's in his own world sometimes."
Hearing this, you felt a pang of guilt for lying. You knew Heeseung was reserved, but it hurt seeing that his father noticed that too.
“I-I mean we say our hi’s and byes. We just don’t really have a full conversation.” You spoke.
His father nodded, “I’m just hoping you talk to him soon. I’m not trying to put any pressure on the two of you, but Heeseung has always done bad things after my divorce with my ex wife. He’d always go out doing bad stuff and getting in deep trouble. Then he’d go partying and drinking and come back home late. I feel like if you guys talked he’d understand on your side that it’s not just about messing up your life for the worse.”
You stared at him pitful. Maybe if you could try to talk to Heeseung about everything with his dad it could help, but then again it’s not your problem to fix.
“I understand where your coming from Mr. Lee. I’ll try to talk to Heeseung more often.” You smiled softly. Mr. Lee smiled back grateful. Your mom soon came back as you all continued eating your food.
The sun began setting when you decided to finally leave your room after studying for so long. You tiptoed downstairs and headed to the living room. There you saw Heeseung playing video games on the big TV yelling at his friends.
“Dude what the fuck? I said left dumbass!” He shouted. You rolled your eyes and went to the kitchen and grabbed a snack. You took a piece of candy bar and chewed on it while heading back upstairs while hearing Heeseung cuss out his friends.
You shut the door and grabbed your phone as you sat on your bed. You scrolled through social media for a while when all of a sudden your door slammed open. Your eyes widened when you saw Heeseung looking angrily at you.
His eyes widened when he saw you holding something, “Hey! Did you just steal my candy bar?"
You looked up, then looked down at the candy that was already almost gone. Feeling a bit guilty but also defiant, “I was hungry and it was just sitting there."
Heeseung frowned, clearly upset, "That was mine! I was saving it for later."
"I'm sorry, Heeseung. I didn't think you'd mind. I'll get you another one." You reasoned, but Heeseungs ant having any of it.
Before he was gonna rant, he suddenly stopped himself, “I don’t want another one.” He suddenly said.
Your eyebrows furrowed, “T-Then what do you want?” You stuttered. You mentally slapped yourself from how nervous you sounded. Heeseung didn’t say anything and suddenly walked to you, pushing you on your bed. You let out a gasp and stared up at him on top of you.
“Heeseung what are you-“
“Shut up.” He cut you off. You felt his breath on your face. You lay frozen underneath him, waiting for his next move. He took one of his hands and rubbed along your leg making you jolt.
“Hee-“
“I said shut up.” He snapped. You immediately shut your mouth. He then lowered his head on your neck. You felt his hot breath hitting your cold neck. Your eyes shot wide when you felt him lay a soft kiss on it.
“What if I wanna taste something sweeter?” He mumbled in your neck. You let out a whimper when he suddenly squeezed your leg tight. You shut your eyes closed when he finally lifted his head back up, staring right at you.
You waited, but nothing came. Instead you felt his weight get off of you making you slowly open your eyes. You saw him on the side of your bed, with his half eaten candy bar in his hand.
“Next time ask.” Was all he said before leaving your room, slamming it shut. You finally let go of the breath you were holding on to and held your chest.
What the fuck just happen.
After that incident you decided to stay in your room for the rest of the night. You didn’t wanna see Heeseung after what happened. You were deep into your late-night study session when a faint noise downstairs caught your attention.
Curious and a bit concerned, you quietly made your way down the stairs. The sight of Heeseung, dressed in his usual bad boy attire and slipping on his leather jacket, stopped you in your tracks.
"Heeseung, where are you going?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Heeseung glanced at you, his expression unreadable, "It's none of your business," He replied curtly.
You frowned, sensing something was off. "I know you're going to a party. You shouldn't go. What if your dad finds out?"
Heeseung scoffed, shaking his head, “I don't care what he thinks. I need to get out of here."
You stepped closer, your concern growing, "Please, Heeseung. It's not worth the trouble. You know how much your dad worries about you."
Heeseung paused, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment. For a second, you thought he might reconsider. But then he turned away, determination in his stride, "I'll deal with it," he muttered before heading out the door.
You stood there, feeling a mix of worry and helplessness, hoping that Heeseung would stay safe and that one day he might understand how much people cared about him.
You didn’t get how he turns so fast from you. The mix emotions he gives you that leaves you a mess. Has he always had that impact on someone? You went back upstairs deciding to just leave it alone. Besides, he’ll never listen to you.
After few hours of thinking and worrying for Heeseung you finally were able to go to sleep. The house was silent and dark, when you heard the creak of your bedroom door. Groggily, you opened your eyes to see Heeseung stumbling into your room. He reeked of alcohol, and his eyes were unfocused.
"Heeseung? What are you doing here?" You asked, sitting up in bed.
Without a word, he collapsed onto the bed beside you, his head resting on your pillow, "I just... I needed to see you," He slurred, his voice thick with alcohol.
You frowned, worried about his state, "You shouldn't be here. You need to sleep it off."
Heeseung ignored your concern, his eyes half-closed, "You know, you're always so... so smart. I wish I could be like you. Those fuckers.. don’t know what their talking about," He mumbled, his words tumbling out in a disjointed stream.
Before you could respond, he leaned in and pressed his lips to yours. Shocked, you froze for a moment before instinctively slapping him.
Heeseung pulled back, a hurt look in his eyes. "I... I'm sorry," he muttered, getting up and stumbling out of the room.
You sat there, your heart racing, trying to process what had just happened. You didn’t know what came over you to slap him. You then touch your lips. His faint soft lips printed on yours. It then hit you, he was your first kiss.
The next morning, you woke up feeling groggy and disoriented. The events of the previous night played on a loop in your mind, making it hard to focus on anything else. As you walked down the hallway, you saw Heeseung approaching from the other end. Your heart raced, and you felt a wave of panic wash over you.
Heeseung walked past you without a second glance, as if nothing had happened. Confused and hurt, you turned to confront him, "Heeseung, about last night..."
Heeseung stopped and looked at you, his expression blank, “What about last night?" he asked, genuinely puzzled.
“You- don’t you remember?" you said, your voice trembling slightly.
Heeseung frowned, shaking his head, "I don't remember anything from last night. I was pretty out of it."
His words felt like a punch to the gut. You had been so affected by what happened, but to him, it was just a forgotten moment in a drunken haze. Feeling a mix of frustration and sadness, you walked away to the restroom, trying to push the memory to the back of your mind.
How could he forget that? Now you're the only one to remember the mess he had made. You did your usual in the bathroom and came out. You didn’t Heeseung anywhere and went back to your room. Maybe going on a walk would be fine to clear the head. As you finished getting dressed, you opened your door and headed downstairs.
You didn’t noticed Heeseung anywhere and put on your shoes before heading out the door. As you stepped outside, you saw him playing basketball in the driveway.
Heeseung glanced up, noticing you, "Where are you going?" he asked, pausing his game.
"For a walk," You replied, trying to keep your voice steady.
He simply nodded and went back to his game, the sound of the ball bouncing echoing in the quiet morning. You continued walking, but your mind kept drifting back to the way he had kissed you. The memory was vivid, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't shake it off.
Each step you took seemed to bring back a fragment of that moment, making it harder to move on. You felt a pang of longing mixed with the hurt of knowing he didn't remember. The walk, meant to be a distraction, only made you more aware of the emotions you were trying to escape.
You came back a few minutes later, it was just a walk around the neighborhood anyways. Heeseung was still playing, not paying any mind to you. You walked past him and went inside. You decided to do your studies in the kitchen.
You went upstairs to grab your essentials before coming back down and sitting at the kitchen table, buried in a pile of homework. Heeseung soon came inside and sauntered in the kitchen. He grabbed an apple, and sat across from you. He watched you intently, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
"Why do you always have your head in a book? Don't you ever do anything fun?" he asked, taking a bite of the apple.
"Studying is fun for me," you replied curtly, not looking up.
Heeseung laughed, "You really are something else."
You rolled your eyes, “At least I don’t go out partying and getting drunk and coming back and doing the unthinkable.”
Heeseung stopped chewing and stared at you with an unreadable expression. It was silent for a few minutes and that’s when you were gonna apologize but he beat you to it.
“Did I bring my girlfriend over yesterday?” He whispered. You paused and looked at him. He has a girlfriend? You felt your mouth go completely dry.
Heeseung has a girlfriend. When the hell did he had a girlfriend? That’s when it finally came to you. Heeseung has a girlfriend, and he kissed you. Heeseung noticed your shocked face and waved his hand in front of your face, “Nerd? You there?” He said.
“Y-You have a girlfriend?” You questioned.
Heeseung frowned before nodding, “Haven’t told my dad though since he would freak out, but now that I’ve brung her over it’s fine.”
He thinks he brung her over last night. He really doesn’t remember anything, you thought.
“No you didn’t bring her over Heeseung, “ You didn’t know if it was even okay to say anything at this point, “I-I was talking about what you did with me-“
“Y/n sweetie were heading out can you lock the door?” You mom yells from the living room. You gasped, completely forgetting that your mom and Mr. Lee were even home.
“Coming!” You yelled back. You ignored Heeseungs look and went to your mom in the living room. She kissed your cheek before shutting the door. You locked it and headed back to the kitchen.
You noticed Heesueng looked deep in thought. You slowly walked over to him, “Heeseung-“
"Forget about last night," He said abruptly, his voice lacking its usual edge.
You blinked, taken aback, "What do you mean?"
Heeseung's eyes shifted away from yours, "Just forget it happened," he repeated, more firmly this time. Without waiting for a response, he got up from his seat and walked away, leaving you alone with a whirlwind of emotions.
You decided to shake it off and bury yourself in your homework, but his words kept coming back. Each time you tried to focus on a math problem or a history chapter, your mind wandered back to the way he said it so causally. It was impossible to concentrate, and your frustration grew with each passing minute.
As night fell, you heard the familiar sound of Heeseung's laughter outside. You looked out the window and saw him heading out with his friends, the streetlights casting long shadows on the pavement. You didn’t even hear him leave. The sight of him leaving made your heart sink. A mix of anger and sadness welled up inside you, he really doesn’t learn.
The next morning, something felt off. You woke up and immediately went to Heeseungs room. You knocked on the door about five times before opening it, that’s when you noticed that Heeseung's bed was untouched. Panic started to creep in as you realized he hadn't come home. You tried to rationalize it, telling yourself that he might have crashed at a friend's place. But the nagging worry wouldn't go away.
As you made your way downstairs, you were greeted by Mr. Lee. His eyes were filled with concern, and you could tell he had noticed Heeseung's absence as well. "Did Heeseung mention anything to you last night? He didn’t come home last night or today." he asked, his voice tinged with worry.
You hesitated for a moment, your mind racing. You knew you should tell him the truth, that Heeseung had gone out and hadn't come back. But something held you back. Maybe it was a sense of loyalty to Heeseung you didn’t know of, or perhaps a fear of getting him into trouble, "No, nothing happened," You lied, forcing a smile, “He probably just stayed over at a friend's place."
Heeseung's dad didn't look convinced, but he nodded, seemingly accepting your explanation. You quickly grabbed your bag and headed out the door, eager to escape the tense atmosphere.
School felt like a blur. You couldn't focus on your classes, your mind constantly drifting back to Heeseung. You scanned the hallways, hoping to catch a glimpse of him, but he was nowhere in sight. Each passing hour only intensified your worry.
By lunchtime, you were a bundle of nerves. You sat alone at your usual spot in the cafeteria, poking at your food without any real appetite. The absence of Heeseung was worrying you like crazy, and you couldn't shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.
As the day dragged on, you found yourself checking your phone repeatedly, hoping for a message or a call from him. But there was nothing. The silence was deafening, and the worry gnawed at you like a relentless beast.
You knew you had to find him, to make sure he was okay. But where to start? Heeseung was a master at keeping his whereabouts a mystery, and you had no idea where he could be. The uncertainty was suffocating, and you felt utterly helpless.
As you walked home that evening, the weight of the situation settled heavily on your shoulders. You couldn't shake the feeling that something had happened, something that had kept Heeseung from coming home.
Heeseung finally stumbled through the front door late at night, his usual nonchalant demeanor firmly in place. You had been sitting on the couch, unable to focus on anything but the worry gnawing at your insides. The moment you saw him, relief flooded through you, but it was quickly replaced by a mix of frustration and concern.
"Heeseung, where have you been?" You asked, your voice trembling slightly.
He shrugged, kicking off his shoes and heading towards the stairs, "Out with friends. I'm going to bed," He said casually.
Before he could take another step, Mr. Lee appeared, blocking his path. "Heeseung, we need to talk," Mr. Lee said sternly.
Heeseung rolled his eyes, "Not now, Dad. I'm tired."
But his dad wasn't having it, "No, we're talking now. You can't just come and go as you please without any explanation."
The tension in the room was palpable as the argument escalated, “And who are you to stop me?” Heeseung snapped. You gasped at the way Heeseung said that to Me. Lee.
Me. Lee let out a deep breath through his nose, “I am your father Heeseung.”
Heeseung scoffed, “You lost that status the second you told mom you wanted a divorce.”
Everything else just felt faint to you. Voices were raised, accusations were thrown, and you could see the hurt and anger in Heeseung's eyes. Finally, he stormed off to his room, slamming the door behind him.
You hesitated for a moment, watching as Mr. Lee went to sit on the kitchen table. You decided to follow Heesueng. You found him sitting on the edge of his bed, his head in his hands. Without a word, you sat down next to him and gently placed a hand on his back. Heeseung looked up, his eyes glistening with unshed tears.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice cracking.
You wrapped your arms around him, pulling him into a comforting embrace, “It's okay, Heeseung. I'm here for you," you murmured.
Heeseung finally let the tears fall, his body shaking with silent sobs. You held him close, offering what comfort you could. Gradually, the tension began to ease, and the exhaustion of the day caught up with both of you.
Eventually, you both lay down on his bed, still holding each other. As the night wore on, the steady rhythm of his breathing lulled you into a peaceful sleep, the worries of the day fading away in the warmth of both of your presence.
The next morning, you woke up early, the events of the previous night still fresh in your mind. You got ready for school, the house unusually quiet. As you walked into the kitchen, you were surprised to see Mr. Lee and your mom sitting at the table, sipping coffee and chatting.
"Good morning," you greeted them, trying to keep your voice steady.
"Good morning, dear," your mom replied with a warm smile, "Heeseung's in the shower. He'll be out soon."
You nodded, feeling a mix of relief and apprehension. You quickly got dressed and gathered your things for school. Just as you were finishing up, Heeseung emerged from the bathroom, his hair still damp and a towel slung over his shoulders.
"Hey," he said, his voice softer than usual.
"Hey," you replied, trying to read his expression.
Heeseung hesitated for a moment before speaking again, "Do you want a ride to school?"
You blinked in surprise. Heeseung offering to drive you to school was unexpected, especially after the tense night before. "Uh, sure. That'd be great."
As you walked to his car, you couldn't help but notice how different he seemed. The usual edge in his demeanor was softened, and he seemed genuine. The ride to school was quiet, but it wasn't the uncomfortable silence you had feared. Instead, it felt comforting.
When you arrived at school, Heeseung turned to you, "Thanks for being there last night."
You smiled back, feeling a warmth spread through you. "Anytime, Heeseung. Anytime."
Students watched as you and Heeseung got out of his cars. Whispers and chatters were heard around you, but you didn’t seem to care. Heeseung walked you to your class and bid you goodbye.
You didn’t know why Heeseung decided to change like this, but at the same time you weren’t complaining.
The school day went by fast to you. You didn’t see Heeseung at lunch, but decided to ignore it. You stepped out of the school gates and saw Heeseung. He made eye contact with you. You slowly walked over to him confused.
“Are you waiting for someone?” You asked him. He nodded his head and tilted it.
“I was waiting for you.” He spoke. Your eyes widened.
“Me? Why?” You mumbled. It was more like a question to yourself than him.
“Cause I can? Come on I’m getting tired. Feels like I’ve been standing here for ages.” He said. You guilty got into the car.
The car ride was silent when you guys got back. You and Heeseung both got out of his car, shutting it with slam. As you were gonna go to the door Heeseung suddenly grabbed your wrist. Your eyebrows furrowed as you look at him.
"I need your help," he said, his voice uncharacteristically soft. "My dad owes me an apology, and I think you can help me get it."
You were taken aback. Was that why he was being nice to you? You didn’t know what to feel.
“Is that why you were nice to me today?” You mumbled, feeling somewhat offended.
Heeseung shook his head confused, “Of course not. I was being nice because of what you did yesterday. No one has ever done that before.”
You hummed in acknowledgment, you began to think that maybe, just maybe, Heeseung was more than his bad boy facade.
“Okay, I’ll help you.” You said. Heeseung gave you a sweet smile that made your feel some type of way. Nonetheless, you gave him a smile back.
Over the next few days, Heeseung's behavior changed. He started doing small, nice things for you—making you coffee in the morning, helping you with your chores, and even engaging in conversations about your interests.
You couldn’t help but notice how when he listened to you, he had a look in his eyes that made your heart race. How he listened to every last detail you’d tell about anything. How he makes comments about little things about you that you’ve never mentioned to him or anyone else. You felt like Heeseung was actually making a change towards you.
On the other hand, you gave out advice for him to follow to make his dad apologize, like suggesting he have an honest conversation about his feelings. Surprisingly, Heeseung took your advice to heart.
Finally, the day came when Heeseung confronted his dad about everything. It didn’t come as easy though.
“Heeseung, I want you to understand the importance of this family. I know we all don’t understand you the way your mom did, but I’m willing to make an effort to show you to see the good side of life.” Mr. Lee said. You noticed Heeseung was a lot calmer than the last time. While on your end, you were praying to god nothing breaks out into fits of anger.
“I know, I just couldn’t stop thinking about how our family used to be. I miss how we we used to be.” Heeseung whispered the last part under his death.
You watched how Mr. Lee's face went from upset to sad. You felt bad that you couldn’t step in and comfort. The moment those two words fell out, Mr. Lee lips, for the first time you saw a glimmer of vulnerability in Heeseung's eyes. They hugged and departed from each other. Mr. Lee gave you a knowing nod with you smiling back.
Heeseung looked over at you and gave you a small smile. That was the first time he ever smiled at you. You gave a him a big smile back with a thumbs up. Just as you thought everything will finally get better, you soon found out how wrong you were.
Later that night, Heeseung, having achieved his goal, didn't stick around to celebrate with you. Instead, he grabbed his jacket and headed out to a party, leaving you standing alone in the house, feeling used and betrayed.
You sat on the couch, staring at the door he had just walked out of, wondering if any of the kindness he had shown you was real or just a means to an end. The realization stung, but it also made you stronger.
Instead of letting him leave like that, your only thought was to follow him. You knew where he was going after hearing a phone call with his friend about a party that was happening later today. You grabbed your moms keys and left the house. You knew the address since you also overheard when his friend was on speaker.
You had never been to a party before, and tonight, you decided to see for yourself what drew him away so often. The party was at a house a few blocks away, already throbbing with loud music and laughter. You hesitated at the doorway, but your determination pushed you inside.
The atmosphere was overwhelming, a stark contrast to your usual quiet evenings. You scanned the room for Heeseung, hoping to catch a glimpse of him amidst the chaos.
As you navigated through the crowd, you accidentally bumped into someone. You groaned and looked up. Your eyes widened when you saw it was one of Heeseung's friends, Park Sunghoon. He was tall, with a smug smile that made you instantly freeze, "Hey, aren't you that nerd that was with Heeseung that one day? What are you doing here?" he questioned.
You straightened your posture, trying to muster some confidence, "It's none of your business why I'm here," you replied, your voice steady despite the knot in your stomach.
Sunghoon let out a deep chuckle before leaning on the wall. You weren’t gonna lie and say he didn’t look attractive doing that, “Right. None of my business. So did you just come here to get a quick fuck?”
You gasped at his sentence, “W-What? No! I-I was here just because I can!” You stuttered. Sunghoon smug smile never left when he suddenly leaned towards you. Both of your face close to each other.
“You know, if you ever wanna have fun, you know where I’m at. Heeseung doesn’t need to know.” Sunghoon whispered. Even though the music was booming loudly, you could still hear him from how close he was to you. His breath smelling like alcohol and somewhat of a minty smell.
Just as you were about to walk away, Heeseung suddenly appeared beside him. His eyes locked onto yours, and for a moment, you thought you saw a flicker of recognition. But then, his expression turned cold.
“What are you doing Sunghoon?" He coolly asked, acting like you aren’t there. Sunghoon backed away from you and gave Heeseung a pat.
“Nothing man. Just talking to this nerd. You know her right?” Sunghoon teased. He knew the answer, but to your confusion he still asked.
Heeseung shrugged nonchalantly, "No idea who she is," he said, his voice devoid of any warmth. The words hit you like a punch to the gut.
Feeling a mix of embarrassment and hurt, you turned on your heel and pushed your way through the crowd, desperate to escape.
Thats when the tears stung your eyes as you made your way back to the apartment. The night air was cool against your flushed cheeks, but it did little to soothe the ache in your chest.
You reached your car, fumbling with the keys. You finally managed to unlock the door and slid into the driver's seat, resting your head on the steering wheel. The sound of the passenger door opening startled you. You looked up, eyes widening as Heeseung climbed in beside you.
"What are you doing?" You asked, your voice trembling with a mix of anger and confusion.
Heeseung leaned back in the seat, his expression unreadable, "Why were you at the party?" He asked, ignoring your question.
You looked away, not wanting to admit the truth, "I just wanted to see what it was like," You muttered.
Heeseung sighed, running a hand through his hair, "You don't belong in places like that," He said firmly, "Why didn't you just stay home?"
You clenched your fists, frustration boiling over, "Because I wanted to see you," You blurted out before you could stop yourself, "I wanted to understand why you always leave. How parties can make your worries disappear! Why you always switch out on me.” You voice cracking at the end.
Heeseung's eyes softened, and he reached out to gently cup your cheek, "You don't always need to know everything about me," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
Before you could respond, Heeseung leaned in, capturing your lips in a tender kiss. Your heart raced as you melted into the kiss, feeling the barriers between your worlds begin to crumble. When he finally pulled away, he rested his forehead against yours, a small smirk playing on his lips.
You suddenly remembered about his girlfriend and pushed him away, “Heeseung your girlfriend-“
“I don’t wanna think about her right now.” He said. You gulped hard. You knew what you did was wrong, but seeing Heeseung so calm made you relax a bit.
He then looked at you again, “Let's go home," He said softly. You slowly nodded and started the car, exiting the driveway and leaving the loud house. The car ride was silent, with Heeseung staring out the window.
You averted your gaze to him from time to time, however not saying anything. When you guys finally got back you got out the car and headed to the door. You unlocked it, letting yourself in before Heeseung came in.
Just as you were about to say something Heeseung suddenly pinned you on the door, “Heeseung what are you-“
He cut you off and kissed you harshly. You let out a gasp when he nibbled on your bottom lip. He then entered his tongue in your mouth. You squirmed feeling his hot tongue swirling with yours. It all felt too hot. You moaned when he roughly gripped your hips.
The thought of his girlfriend completely washed away when he broke the kiss with both of your salivas connecting at your lips. He didn’t waste a second, grabbing your wrist and taking you to his room. Heeseung's eyes glinted with mischief as he led you to his room, his grip firm yet oddly gentle.
It was the second time going to his room, this time with him with you. The contrast between his tough exterior and the care he took in guiding you made your heart race. As you stepped inside, you couldn't help but notice how surprisingly neat his room was.
Your eyes wandered over the shelves lined with books, some of which you recognized from your own collection. A small, framed photo of a younger Heeseung with a genuine smile caught your eye, and you felt a pang of curiosity about the story behind it. The room was filled with little details that contradicted his bad boy image – a neatly made bed, a few potted plants, and a desk organized with precision.
Heeseung caught you staring and smirked, "Surprised?" He asked, leaning casually against the doorframe. You nodded, unable to hide your amazement. "There's more to me than meets the eye," He said, his voice softer than you'd ever heard it before.
You sat on his bed with him still standing in front of you. He then leaned down and pecked your lips before going on top of you as you lay on the sheets. He started trailing kisses along your neck. You let out a quiet moan when you felt him starting to suck on your neck.
Heeseung grinned at your sensitivity and playfully bit your neck, making you squeak. You wrapped your arms instinctively around his neck. You mewled when you felt him grind on your cloth core. Everything felt too unreal to you.
“Fuck. I can practically feel your wetness.” He groaned. He took his hand and rubbed against your leg like the last time, but this time he slowly crept towards you core.
“H-Hee.” You whimpered. Hearing you already making a nickname for him made him hard. You let out a relief sigh when he finally rubbed against your heat. The pressure of pleasure floating in your body.
Heeseung bit his lip, suppressing a groan when he finally felt your wet shorts.
“Hee please.” You groaned. Heeseung smirked and stared at your facial expression. Mouth agape, eyes rolled back, hair messy, Heeseung knew he was gonna be a goner.
“What do you want princess?” He whispered. His voice husky and filled with lust. You felt yourself already creating a pool with the way he sounded.
“I-It feels weird Hee! Please do something.” You weakly stated. Something inside lit up in Heeseung hearing you say that.
A virgin is probably his most favorite thing when it comes to sex. He didn’t waste any time taking off your shorts. He let out a breath when he saw the wet patch on your underwear and lowered his body down.
Before you could ask what he was doing you suddenly felt a wet sensation on your underwear, “Oh god Heeseung!” You let out a cry and arched your back. Heeseung hummed and licked up and down on your slit. The feeling of pleasure was too much for you.
He stopped and looked up at you, “I wanna see you begging.” He breathed out. He slid off your underwear effortlessly revealing your glistening pussy. You tried covering yourself up but Heeseungs wasn’t having none of that. He pulled your legs apart roughly making you whine. You felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment. The way his hard stare was on you.
“If I would’ve know your pussy looked this good I would’ve fucked you sooner.” He said. Your eyes went wide. Now your cheeks were definitely a crimson red. He lowered once again and didn’t give you a chance to say anything before he dipped his tongue inside.
You gripped the sheets at his sudden urgency and let out a loud moan. You didn’t know if your guys parents were home, but it was too late now. He licked your folds up and down, swirling his tongue around your bud. You gripped his locks and wrapped your leg around his head.
“Hee! Oh fuck!” You squealed. He cursed in your pussy and finally dipped his tongue in your hole. You couldn’t control any of your moans anymore. The sound of slurping and moaning bounced around his room.
You felt a weird pit in your stomach and thrashed around, “H-Hee I think I’m gonna- ah!” You moaned and jerked forward. Your orgasm coming quickly and hard. Your mouth went agape as you let out hard breaths feeling Heeseung lick everything up.
You squeezed his locks, feeling overstimulated. You tapped his head weakly, “H-Heeseung no more.” You rasped out. Heeseung finally stopped and licked his lips. Your cum on his chin, his eyes hazy and unfocused.
“How am I gonna fit?” He asked you. Your eyes widened. Shit, he really wanted to have sex with you. You started stammering random words while Heeseung stared at you. If he was gonna fuck you, you have to enjoy it too.
He cut off your rant by kissing you again. You immediately kissed him back, not feeling his fingers near your hole. You let out a scream when you felt his finger slowly enter you.
“Shh it’s okay. It’ll hurt for a quick second.” He muttered. You tried to get used to it, however the pressure was too much.
“H-Heeseung I can’t! It hurts!” You sniffled. Heeseung pampered you with kisses, trying to distract you. You looked so pretty when you cry.
“I know princess. It’ll feel good. I promise.” He reasoned. You panted hard when you suddenly felt your hole slowly getting used to it. Soon enough you were a moaning mess all over again.
“Another one. P-Please.” You dictated. Heeseung grinned and added his other finger. You let out a moan in pleasure feeling his long thick fingers stretching you out.
You felt another orgasm coming again, but Heeseung took his fingers out making you whine. He ignored you, his grin never coming off his face.
He took off his shirt revealing his body. You bit your lip seeing his toned body. You felt something poking you and looked down. There was his hard dick poking out of his pants. You whimpered when he moved it towards your pussy.
“You like what you see?” He teased. You slowly nodded, unsure what to say at that moment. He chuckled at your cuteness and kissed your temple.
You reached your hand unsure if you could touch him. He didn’t seem to mind and leaned in more. You rubbed his cloth dick slowly causing him to hiss. You felt a sudden confidence coming over you and stroked his dick faster. At this point you were practically jerking him off and he seemed to like it, or even loved it.
He pulled away suddenly making you furrow your eyebrows, “Is something wrong?” You mumbled, your brain in a haze.
“I don’t wanna cum like this.” He said. You blushed when he started unbuckling his pants and taking off his pants and boxers at the same time. Your mouth went dry seeing his dick for the first time. It was big.
Is that even gonna fit?
He groaned when he touched it and stroked it slowly. You watched him stroke his dick slowly, blushing and panting. He looked down at you, “Are you ready?”
You impatiently nodded, making him chuckle darkly. He lined his dick at your entrance before slowly pushing in. You felt the air knock out your lungs and gripped him tightly on his arms. He moaned at your tightness. Your whimpers and sniffles made him want to go right at it and fuck you hard.
“Fuck, can I move now princess?” He hissed. You shut your eyes and slowly nodded. He started at a slow pace, watching your every expression to make sure you're not hurting anywhere. Once he sees your face turning from pain to pleasure he picked up his pace faster.
The sound of hard skin slapping heard in his room. You felt dizzy with pleasure with the way he pounded in your pussy, “Oh fuck.” You whimpered.
“Feel good princess?” He asked. You frantically nodded your head. He sighed feeling you clench around him.
“M’gonna cum Heeseung.” You panted out. Heeseung hummed and buried his face in your neck, the feeling making you ticklish. You felt your orgasm coming and scratched onto his back. You bit Heeseung neck feeling your orgasm hitting you. Heeseung let out a pained moan and came after you.
You both panted unevenly and hard. Heeseung slowly pulled out and fell right next to you. You stared up at the ceiling rethinking everything. You had sex with Lee Heeseung, the schools bad boy. The one who made you feel like you were worthless.
Your thoughts were cut off when you felt a strong arm wrap around you. You looked up at Heeseung and saw him also in thought. The silence was somewhat comforting while also heavy. Heeseung nuzzled against the top of your head and sighed.
You slowly felt your eyes get heavy feeling his warmth accompanying you into slumber.
Heeseung looked down when he suddenly heard little snores coming out of you. He stared at your lips and leaned down, giving them a soft peck. Besides, it was gonna be the last time he would feel them.
You woke up to the soft morning light filtering through the curtains, feeling disoriented. As you slowly sat up, you realized you were in an unfamiliar bed. Panic surged through you until you recognized the room – Heeseung's room. The events of last night hit you like a truck, but you distinctly remembered the heated moment that had led you here.
Looking around, you noticed Heeseung was nowhere in sight. Your heart pounded as you spotted a neatly folded note on the pillow beside you. With trembling hands, you picked it up and read:
Had to head to school early. See you there. - Heeseung.
You sighed, a mix of relief and frustration washing over you. Gathering your things, you quickly got ready and made your way to school, your mind racing with thoughts of what had transpired.
As you entered the school grounds, you spotted Heeseung almost immediately. He was leaning against a locker, surrounded by his usual group of friends, exuding his typical bad boy aura. His laughter echoed down the hallway, and you felt an inexplicable pang in your chest.
But what shocked you the most was the girl under his arms, giggling as she whispered something in his ear making him smile. You stood there watching the scene unfold. Your eyes met his for a fleeting moment. His expression shifted from amusement to something unreadable as he watched you.
Suddenly, the memories of last night came flooding back – the new side he shown you yesterday, the intimate moment you guys had together.
Feeling overwhelmed, you quickly looked away and walked past him, determined to ignore him. You could feel his gaze burning into your back, but you kept your head down, focusing on getting to your locker.
Throughout the day, you couldn't shake the feeling of Heeseung's eyes on you. Every time you glanced his way, he was watching, a mix of amusement and something else in his eyes. It was as if he was silently pleading for you to acknowledge him, but you couldn't bring yourself to face him.
During lunch, you found a quiet corner in the library to gather your thoughts. The events of last night played over and over in your mind. Heeseung had been so different – so real. But now, in the harsh light of day, it was easier to retreat behind your walls and pretend it hadn't happened.
As the final bell rang, you gathered your things and headed out, hoping to avoid any further encounters. But as you stepped outside, you saw Heeseung waiting by the gate, his expression serious.
"Nerd," he called out, his voice coming out more firm than usual, "We need to talk."
You hesitated, torn between your instinct to flee and the curiosity gnawing at you. Finally, you took a deep breath and walked over to him, bracing yourself for whatever came next.
“what do you wanna talk about?” You questioned, knowing full well what he wanted to talk about. He knew you weren’t stupid.
"Do you regret it?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
You took a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest. You wanted to tell him that you didn’t and that you would do it again if you could. To tell him that you feel something for him that you’ve never felt with anyone else, but reality came to you that he still has a girlfriend, and that your parents are getting married soon, "Yes," You replied, your voice trembling, "I regret it."
Heeseung's face fell, and he looked away, running a hand through his hair, "I figured," He muttered, "I agree... I just needed to know from your point of you. No hard feelings?”
You nodded your head, holding your tears in, “Agreed.”
After that conversation, you made a conscious effort to avoid him. It wasn't easy, especially when you saw him with his girlfriend, laughing and holding hands. Each time, it felt like a knife to your heart, but you kept your distance, knowing it was for the best.
Despite your efforts, you couldn't help but notice the change in Heeseung. He seemed more distant, more withdrawn. His usual bravado was gone, replaced by a quiet facade that you couldn't ignore. He stopped speaking to you for once, walking right past you whenever you’d see him anywhere in the house. He wouldn’t add sarcastic comments towards your way anymore. He still went to parties and hang outs as usual, but he was a lot more aggressive than usual when he came home drunk.
Days turned into weeks, and you tried your best to avoid him. You buried yourself in your studies, hoping the memory would fade. But every time you saw Heeseung with his girlfriend, a pang of guilt and regret twisted in your chest.
Or when you would hang out with your mom and Mr. Lee it reminded you exactly why you’re there. Because they were getting married. How would they react when they would’ve found out there kids fucked each other? You didn’t wanna know.
It was like any other day with you reading in the living room. You were almost done with a chapter when you suddenly heard a knock at the door. You didn't think much of it until you heard voices—familiar voices. Curiosity got the better of you, and you opened the door revealing Heeseung's girlfriend, Karina, and his friends Sunghoon, Jake, and Jay.
"Hey, can we come in?" Jake asked, though it seemed more like a statement than a question. You nodded, stepping aside to let them in.
You heard footsteps coming downstairs and was greeted by Heeseung, “Baby!” Karina smiled and went to hug Heeseung. He hugged her back just as tightly.
“Hey baby, I didn’t know you were coming too.” Heeseung chuckled. Karina gave him a teasing smile in return.
“Well I haven’t seen you since yesterday so I decided to come over!” She chimed. Heeseung seemed to be ignoring you completely, his attention focused on his girlfriend.
You were cut off with your thoughts when Heeseungs friends all greeted you with a mix of politeness and indifference, but Sunghoon gave you a knowing smirk.
They made their way upstairs, laughing and chatting amongst themselves. Heeseung didn't even glance your way, and you felt a pang of something—was it disappointment? You shook it off, returning to the living room with your book.
A little while later, there was a knock on the wall. You looked up to see Sunghoon standing there, leaning casually against the wall like he did the last time at the party.
"Hey," He said, his voice smooth and friendly, "Got a minute?"
You didn’t like where this was going. You nodded, putting down your book, “What's up?"
"There's this party later tonight," Sunghoon began, stepping closer to the couch you were sitting at. "It's gonna be pretty cool. I was wondering if you'd like to come with us."
You blinked, taken aback. A party? You remembered the last time and gulped. You hesitated, unsure of how to respond.
"I don't know," you said finally, "Parties aren't really my thing, especially from last time.”
Sunghoon smiled, his eyes twinkling with mischief, "Come on, it'll be fun. You might even enjoy yourself."
You bit your lip, still uncertain, "I'll think about it.”
"Fair enough," Sunghoon said, giving you a nod, "Just let me know."
He left, and you were alone with your thoughts. A party? With Heeseung and his friends? It seemed like a bad idea, but a part of you was curious. What would it be like to step out of your comfort zone again, even just for one more night?
As the hours passed, you found yourself thinking more and more about Sunghoon's invitation. Finally, you made up your mind.
You rifled through your closet, looking for something to wear. You settled on an outfit that was a little out of the ordinary for you—something that made you feel confident and a bit daring.
When you were ready, you took a deep breath and headed downstairs. it seemed as if Sunghoon was waiting for you, his eyes widening in surprise and admiration when he saw you.
"Wow," He said, a grin spreading across his face, "You look amazing."
You felt a blush creep up your cheeks. "Thanks."
He offered you his arm, and you took it, feeling a strange mix of excitement and nervousness. As you walked out the door, you didn’t notice a certain someone watching the scene unfold in front him.
You decided to drive with Sunghoon since he insisted and made your way to the party.
The night was electric with the buzz of excitement as you stepped into the party, your heart pounding with a mix of anticipation and nerves. You adjusted your glasses and smoothed down your dress, feeling slightly out of place among the throngs of people. Sunghoon was by your side, his easy smile putting you at ease.
"Come on, let's dance," He said, taking your hand and leading you to the dance floor. The music was loud, the bass thumping through your body as you moved to the rhythm. Sunghoon's presence was comforting, his laughter infectious as he twirled you around.
As you danced, you couldn't help but notice Heeseung across the room. He was leaning against the wall, his arm draped around Karina’s shoulder. His eyes, however, were fixed on you and Sunghoon. There was a dark intensity in his gaze that sent shivers down your spine. You tried to ignore it, focusing on the fun you were having with Sunghoon.
But the more you danced, the more you felt Heeseung's eyes on you. It was unsettling, and you found yourself glancing his way more often than you intended. Karina seemed oblivious, chatting animatedly with her friends, but Heeseung's attention never wavered.
"Hey, you okay?" Sunghoon asked, noticing your distraction.
"Yeah, I'm fine," You lied, giving him a reassuring smile. "Just a bit hot in here."
"Let's get some air," He suggested, leading you outside to the patio. The cool night air was a welcome relief, and you took a deep breath, trying to calm your racing heart.
Sunghoon leaned against the railing, looking at you with concern, "You sure you're okay?"
You nodded, but your mind was elsewhere. You couldn't stop thinking about Heeseung. The way he looked at you, the way he seemed to be watching your every move. It was driving you crazy.
Before you knew it, you found yourself leaning in and kissing Sunghoon. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision, a desperate attempt to get Heeseung out of your mind. Sunghoon was surprised but didn't pull away, his lips soft and warm against yours.
But the kiss didn't have the desired effect. Instead of forgetting about Heeseung, you felt his gaze burning into you even more intensely. You pulled away from Sunghoon, feeling a mix of guilt and confusion.
"Sorry," you mumbled, not sure what else to say.
Sunghoon looked at you with a mix of surprise and concern, "It's okay. Are you sure you're alright?"
Before you could answer, you felt a strong hand grab your arm. You turned to see Heeseung, his expression dark and angry, “We need to talk," he said, his voice low and dangerous.
He didn't give you a chance to respond, pulling you away from Sunghoon and into the house. You stumbled after him, your heart pounding in your chest. He led you upstairs to a quiet room, closing the door behind him.
"What the hell was that?" He demanded, his eyes blazing with anger.
You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself, "What are you talking about?"
"You know exactly what I'm talking about," He said, stepping closer, “You and Sunghoon."
You looked away, unable to meet his intense gaze, "It's none of your business."
Heeseung grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him, "It is my business," he said, his voice low and dangerous, “You think you can just kiss him and I'll be okay with it?"
You felt a surge of defiance. "Why do you care? You have a girlfriend."
Heeseung's grip tightened, his eyes flashing with anger, “You think I care about her? The only reason I'm with her is because I can't have you."
His words took you by surprise, and you felt a mix of emotions swirling inside you. Anger, confusion, and something else you couldn't quite identify, "Then why didn't you ever say anything?"
Heeseung let go of your chin, running a hand through his hair in frustration, "Because I'm an idiot. All these fucking feelings I’ve been feeling pisses me off. Were too different for each other. Which is why I also thought you'd never be interested in someone like me."
You took a step back, trying to process everything, "And now?"
Heeseung looked at you, his expression softening, "Now I can't stand the thought of you with someone else."
You felt your resolve melting, the anger and confusion giving way to something else. You couldn’t hold it in anymore. Fuck it. "Then show me," you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
Heeseung didn't need any more encouragement. He closed the distance between you, his lips crashing against yours with a desperate intensity. You melted into the kiss, all the pent-up emotions finally finding release.
You moaned into the kiss, letting his tongue entering your mouth. You didn’t know how much you missed this when he finally lay you on the bed. He didn’t waste time stripping off his clothes, still leaving you cloth. Before he could take your clothes off you stop him, “Wait a minute.”
Heeseung frowned. Did you wanted to stop already? He didn’t have time to think before you suddenly got up and kneel down. Oh shit. Heeseung stared at you in shock.
“Are you, doing what I think you’re doing?” He said, unsure if you were actually gonna do it. You nodded and bit your lip. His hard dick leaking precum. You slowly grabbed it and stroked it slow. Heeseung threw his head back feeling you squeeze around the tip and went faster.
“Shit! Wait.” He muttered. You ignored him and put the just the tip in your mouth. You hummed finally being able to taste him. Heeseung let out a drawn moan feeling your hot wet tongue.
He grabbed your head and gently pushed your head deeper down. You obliged obediently and went back and forth. You felt his dick tense slightly, letting it rest on your tongue.
“Ah hell. Why are you so good at this?” He questioned. You took his dick out your mouth and stroked it.
“Google.” You simply said. Heeseung couldn’t help but let out a breathy chuckle. You smiled and went back to sucking his dick. He soon felt his climax coming and made you deep throat him.
You gagged a little but recomposed yourself and let him use you. You moaned when you felt his hot spurts of cum going down your throat. You made sure you swallowed every last drop before letting go with a pop.
You got back up and kissed him. He sighed into the kiss and pushed you back on the bed. He helped you take off your clothes and kissed along your chest. You whimpered when you felt him suck on one of your breast while fondling with the other.
You grabbed his hand and lead it down to your wet pussy, he rubbed it in circular motion.
“Please Heeseung put it in now. I can’t wait.” You ranted. Heeseung chuckled and slowly lined his dick at your entrance. He rubbed his dick alongside your folds making you mewl.
He finally entered inside you making you both moan in unison. He didn’t wait a second to let you get used to his size and went full speed. You moaned uncontrollably, not being able to hold back. Heeseung kissed you to make you a bit quiet.
“You’re so tight princess. Fuck, gonna breed this pussy dry.” He moaned. You nodded your head, long gone to even cooperate what he was saying. He grabbed both your legs and pushed them against you shoulders, having better access to fuck your hole.
You let out a cry when he hit your spot and arched your back. Heeseung smirked, not stopping his brutal pace on you. You felt your orgasm coming and bit your finger to stop yourself from being loud. Your orgasm came out long and drawn while Heeseung watched you unfold.
He gave out a few more thrust before cumming deep inside you. You let out pants and watched Heeseung take out his dick. He got up from the bed to the restroom and came back with a wash cloth.
He wiped the both of you off and helped you get dress. As you guys finished you finally looked at him.
“Heeseung, what are we?” You finally asked. Heeseung stared at you before giving you a small smile.
“Whatever you want us to be.” He replied. You bit your lip uncertain. He still had a girlfriend.
“Your girlfriend. What about her-“
“I broke up with her. Right when I saw you and Sunghoon leave to the balcony I knew you were the one.” He admitted. You felt your heart swell up and smiled.
“Then I want us to be together then Hee.” You whispered. Heeseung nodded and cupped your face.
“Whatever you want princess.” He said before giving you a peck. You then went back downstairs to the party and walked towards the exit. Before you left you saw Sunghoon talking to one of his friends.
You both made brief eye contact, but what surprise you was when Sunghoon gave you a smile and wink. You quickly felt yourself smiling back at him and waving bye.
You went inside Heeseungs car and buckled your seatbelt. Heeseung started the car while having his other hand on yours. You didn’t know what you guys were gonna do when you get home, but you knew you will sort things out tomorrow.
For now, you’ll enjoy this moment with his comfort surrounding you. And the love that was finally growing that you guys held out for so long.
#lee heeseung x you#lee heeseung x y/n#lee heeseung x reader#heeseung x reader#heeseung x you#heeseung x yn#enha heeseung#enhypen heeseung#enha lee heeseung#enhypen lee heeseung#lee heesung smut#lee heeseung#lee heeseung enhypen#enha#enha smau#enha smut#enha x reader#enhypen#enha fluff#enha imagines#enha scenarios#enhypen smut#kpop smut#heesung enhypen#enhypen scenarios#enhypen masterlist#heeseung enha#kpop fluff#kpop x reader#kpop x y/n
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Dating A Foreign Partner
Ot7 x Reader
Summary: How the members would handle being in a relationship with a foreign S/o.
Warnings: brief mentions of racial/cultural discrimination,
A/N: Thank you to @bethanysnow for requesting this, I hope you like it!😘💜 I tried to keep these a bit lighter, but if there’s something more specific that any of you would like to see, lmk!
Masterlist
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Jin:
Sounds cliche, but I think he would really enjoy trying foods from where you're from, especially some of the more ‘unusual’ ones(I literally found out the other day that pb&j sandwiches are considered weird in Korea??)
I think you two would accidentally confuse each other with lesser known cultural differences, like when he first asks you to be official after only like two dates(which is normal in korean culture, but not so much in western dating)
Would become very aware of the prejudices and discrimination that foreign couples deal with in both your countries. Like, obviously he was aware it was an issue before, but dealing with it first hand made him realize just how much of an issue it was.
It would make his heart soo happy to see you learning how to speak Korean or embracing different parts of his culture.
(Secretly studies your native language to surprise you for your birthday or anniversary)
Yoongi:
I might be projecting a lil bit, but I can honestly see him having a foreign partner. Idk, I just see him not really paying much mind to things like race/nationality, he likes who he likes and that’s it.
Might be a little shy about how much more comfortable you are with things like casual skinship tho, but he also kinda secretly loves it.
He would really love that you’re so direct sometimes, rather than trying to ask for things in a more roundabout ‘polite’ way that is considered proper in Korean culture. He would love that you’re to the point, like him.
Would be so flattered if you made the effort to learn Korean, grinning so big the first time he hears you use even something little like “Hajima” correctly.
He’d do the same with your language too. Learning about your culture would be really important to him, he wants you to know that he appreciates you and where you came from.
Hobi:
Tbh, I totally see him with a foreign partner, he would love the variety and unique energy that you bring to each other's lives.
I think he would tend to forget some of the differences in how you both grew up until you mention something more drastic like school safety drills and he has to do a double take like “wtf?!”
I think he would love how open and expressive you are about your home and culture, and loves learning about where you came from. You’re his favorite person, he wants to know as much as possible about you!
Would have soo much fun teaching you about all the different holidays and traditions in Korea that differ from where you’re from.
Would be soo surprised if you learned to speak Korean, even if it’s just a few phrases at first. He just gets so happy and giggly hearing you speak.
Namjoon:
I think most people consider him the most likely out of the group to have a foreign partner, and tbh I kinda agree.
He would make a serious effort to learn as much about your country/culture as he could, possibly even wanting to visit there sometime with you.
Despite being pretty well versed in a lot of other cultures, he would definitely still have little moments of culture shock over random things like educational systems. Like I can imagine his surprise/confusion over the more lax approach in some schools or someone being homeschooled(hi).
Would be super impressed if you already knew some korean when you met, but if not, he’s more than happy to help you learn.
Lowkey quite protective over you, bc he knows how harsh Korean media can be towards celebrities having foreign partners.
Jimin:
Thinks your Korean is super cute! He finds it absolutely adorable the way you say certain words, and he loves the way you speak slowly and softly when you’re focused on pronouncing certain phrases correctly.
If you’re new to living in Korea, he would do his best to help you settle in and adjust to the differences in day to day life, as well as comforting you on the days when you feel homesick.
Loves learning about your culture, tho I think he would prefer learning from you than on his, just so he can watch how excited you get talking about your home.
Would be soo excited if he finds any similarities between your cultures, whether it’s how you celebrate certain holidays, or a similar dish. He loves finding those little connections.
Another who would be rather protective over you, especially if he knows you have anxieties about certain things due to public safety issues where you’re from. He just wants to make sure you to feel safe
Taehyung:
I know a lot of people see him as rather traditional when it comes to things like dating/relationships, but I could very much see him with a foreign partner, especially since he talked about wanting to live abroad at some point in the future.
I think he would find your different perspectives really refreshing, you really help broaden each other's horizons.
I honestly think he would be another who would sometimes forget the differences in how you both grew up until he brings up something and you’re like “We never did that??”
Lowkey brags about you every chance he gets like “Oh ,Y/n’s from (country name), and they were teaching me about-”
He never treats it as if you’re some sort of novelty tho, he just really loves you and wants to show you that he supports you and shares your pride for who you are and where you’re from.
Jungkook:
I think he would have a lot of fun with a foreign partner, learning about each other's cultures and sharing stories about your upbringings.
Might take him a while to adjust to things like your relationships/dynamics with other guys, just bc that’s not quite as common in Korea, but I could see him actually really enjoying it if you fit into his friend group bc of that.
Another that would feel rather protective over you for similar reasons as Joon. If anyone so much as looks at you weird, he’s gonna shut them down soo fast.
He loves hearing you speak in your native language, there’s something about it that’s just so soothing and melodic about it to him. But it’s only when you're speaking, it’s not the same with anyone else.
Would ask you to teach him so that he can hear you speak it more(study dates where you help each other would be super cute and cozy)
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @comingupwithacoolnameishard @bo0o0o0ooo @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz
#bts x reader#bts x y/n#bts requests#bts scenarios#bts reaction#bts reactions#bts headcanons#seokjin x reader#seokjin x y/n#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x reader#hoseok x y/n#hoseok x reader#namjoon x y/n#namjoon x reader#jimin x y/n#jimin x reader#taehyung x y/n#taehyung x reader#jungkook x y/n#jungkook x reader#7ndipity
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The thing I love about Hbomberguy’s latest video essay on plagiarism is it really gets to the root of why someone plagiarises, which in turn reassures the audience of the soundness of their own creative process and that of the creatives they love. He spends so much time praising and analysing the difference between derivative works (non-negative) and plagiarised works that it reassures and broadens the knowledge of other creatives and of the audiences consuming their works, which in turn helps assuage any unconscious reactionary feelings of “But this other creative I love does something slightly similar”.
As someone who writes, and as someone who went through the churn-em-out of the modern university degree system and all the plagiarism anxiety that comes with that, the topic of copying and mimicking other creatives is a heavy and ill-understood topic in so many spaces. The education system, at least in my country, went from encouraging rote-learning and copying by rewarding those who best memorised answers previously learned (e.g. exam answer schedules, memorising the wording of pre-practiced essays) to encouraging original thought in extensively-written about topics for essays. It’s very hard not to feel like you’re plagiarising when you’re one of 300 first year law students writing about a a topic from one very in-depth source that you’ve studied in class and three smaller ones, and Turnitin has put in your mind that the MOST important thing you can do for this essay is not to pass it, but to reword it well enough not to get caught up in this plagiarism detector. And I can recognise my behaviours in what Hbomberguy identifies - I remember minute-before-the-deadline essays where I was guilty of padding out my biography with sources from my sources, and can think of phrases or techniques of writing I’ve read in books that I sometimes worry might come through in my writing in a way that feels like stealing.
Plagiarism anxiety is real, and it’s fed by a lack of understanding around what plagiarism is and where it comes from. Hbomberguy is so right for complimenting a bunch of lame youtubers for the enthusiasm with which they openly bounce off of other people’s ideas. This collaborative method of creating where ideas are taken and passed on due to love of the craft can feel derivative eventually - but taken within a body of work where the creator is riffing or paying homage to and not merely regurgitating others success is at the heart of where any meaningful success and love for the medium lies. Creators need to be coming from a place of genuine enthusiasm and respect - it’s when they dont, when they’re looking down on others, that we see these behaviours emerging.
And that helps identify the urges within ourselves, and know more firmly whether what we’re doing is tribute or theft, including the many not just acceptable but positive ways of referencing back to sources and inspiration. It helps us tell when we ourselves are genuinely trying to pay homage and when we are treading the more murky waters of unfair attribution. So thanks Hbomberguy for dumbing down this topic in the most relatable but inaccessible-by-length way possible, as per usual.
#continually impressed with the way he manages to add to conversations tbh#hbomberguy#breadtube#video essays#james somerton
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I was just reading up on ink’s faq on comyet’s tumblr and two parts stuck out to me; his rainbow tongue and their tendency to draw outfits on people. and like a quick tw for possible body horror and experimentation for the tongue part I think.
The last one made me think of how I, and a few others, share a HC that killer tends to be more fashion forward than most sanses. that he even starts exploring different outfits and fashion in his good ending with color. I thought it’d be a wonderful idea if it was ink who helped inspire and encourage killer towards that idea.
even if killer decides its ultimately not safe to risk while still held captive by nightmare, i thought itd be rather sweet if his interactions with ink during the darkest periods of killer’s life actually inspires him towards things like self expression and creation—a sense of hope for someone like killer, who has spent his life believing he existed to destroy and be destroyed. and ink seems very good at inspiring others, just by being themself.
my first thought about ink’s tongue, though, created a very vivid scene to me. where like its one of killer’s rare off days, hes exhausted. ink’s sitting nearby, info dumping about an au—killer’s having a hard time keeping track of which one it is today, ink’s words sound like they’re coming from underwater—when a sudden flash of color (hehe) catches his attention.
Rainbow. Inkblot has a fucking rainbow tongue. Killer’s never seen that before!
And before ink knows it their poor tongue is being grabbed between thumb and forefinger and guided out of his mouth by killer and ink’s just like “???” and then killer gives him a dead eyed look and asks, “does this regenerate?” cuz he wants to cut it out and study it lmao.
#killer sans#ink sans#ink!sans#ink!tale#tw body horror#tw experimentation#killer!sans#undertale#utmv#sans au#sans aus#utmv headcanons#killertale#killertale sans#killersans#something new#something new sans#something new au#undertale something new#undertalesomethingnew#undertale aus#undertale multiverse#utmv au#utmv fandom#star sanses#bad sanses#‘a flash of color caught his attention’ omg can u stop being queer for 1 second killer#color sans#< implied#empty duo
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FAVORITE ANON IS BACK
I didn't expect to be back so soon and to have to jump to the other side of the supporting character spectrum butttt here we are...
As we all know by now, A has made her return to the Insta grid and it was a doozy. 48 days after Luke posted his Spain photo dump, A pops out with the "Last bit of summer" which of course includes a picture of her "sunbathing and reading" on what appears to be the same balcony as Luke's from Spain. The 6 photo carousel also includes 2 photos from Cyprus. To many on the internet, this was another "launch" just like the recent London pap pictures.
This is the point where I would like to remind everyone to TAKE A MOMENT AND BREATHE BEFORE YOU REACT.
Now that you've done that, please remember the individual we are talking about. It is important to study patterns and this girl be patterning. Whenever the spotlight turns up on Nic and Luke, she always seems to jump in and tear things down and she is living up to her reputation. Let's add to the fact that Nic is getting torn down from this recent pap and press article incident so why not throw some gasoline on the flames. This is her time to SHINE.
Now I have a couple thoughts on the Spain of it all:
I think it's highly possible this trip happened in mid-late July (when the resort posted the Bridgerton themed post) and right before the birthday trip to Sorrento. It is highly likely that it was also a group trip and I'm not even saying these two were romantic on this trip (similar to my thoughts on Italy). She honestly could've just gotten into his room to take a couple pictures.
Her and her friends on a separate trip and maneuvered their way into the same (or similar) room and recreated the scene. It sounds wild and crazy and wayyyy out of the realm of reality but to be honest, I wouldn't put it past this individual.
My big question is where were any pictures that alluded to Luke being on the trip? The only picture is the balcony picture with her lying on the lounger and it doesn't even include a lot of possible items that would match the photo to being an identical match (the table settings or his underwear on the chair). If you went on a trip with your boyfriend - WHERE IS THE BOYFRIEND? Many are saying she got permission from Luke to post now but if he gave her permission and they are still together then why isn't he in the pictures?
Also, I find it convenient that she has C & S coming out of the woodwork to like and hype her up in the comments almost immediately (her and S have been almost radio silent to each other since Italy). As someone pointed out to me, the comments look like something planned in a group chat.
And to anyone who wants to say it - no I do not believe Luke is mad about Nic and Jake and is lashing out by telling A to post. If you even believe that about him, why are you in this fandom?
What do I believe? I believe we are seeing one of the final acts of a very desperate woman. She has been holding on to these pictures as her "smoking gun" to use one day when the timing is right. Nicola mentioned "Luke" and "marriage" in a Time article and she posted a picture with Luke publicly on her instagram. Once the pap photo controversy went down, A grabbed her chance and ran with it. (The irony of it all is that I think Nic's team may have let the article situation yesterday play out the way it did because they were expecting a grenade from A and she took the bait.)
In the end I will tell you the same thing about Luke that I told you about Nicola - ONLY LISTEN TO THE STORY LUKE IS TELLING YOU. The story Luke told you in his Spain post was that he was a man who was there alone and not on a romantic getaway. Don't listen to the story that psychotic side characters are trying to paint. The reason she's still around and creating this drama is because you all encouraged her all summer. Listen to Nic and listen to Luke and the rest is just noise you need to tune out.
My favorite anon is back so soon.
But I think we needed you, so much appreciated ☺️
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the one thing I am full-bore conspiracy theorist about?
daily contact lenses
or, well, not their existence, period. they're a valid health option that is best for some people, medically. but the sheer aggressiveness with which they're being pushed nowadays
the last few times I went to the eye doctor for my annual check-up, she was HEAVILY on my case to switch to dailies. like, to the point of arrogance and condescension when I said I preferred to stick with monthlies (I've worn contacts since I was 12, for reference). I also posted about it on a forum and got massive negativity in response, as well as being talked down to by someone claiming to be an optometrist himself
now if this were like...anti-vaxxer sentiment I'd understand that reaction. but from what I've heard, while monthlies do carry a higher risk of eye infections and such, they're not medically unsound or unsafe across the board. I'm willing to accept that risk, and since science has not found that they're terrible and should immediately be discontinued, I feel like my wishes should be respected and not belittled
point two: plastic waste. they say it's somehow less than using monthlies, but frankly I just don't see how that's possible. 365 of those little eye chips- times two! -and their packaging, add up to less than a case and a bottle of solution every few months, plus 24 contacts and their packaging? it doesn't make sense to me, and it doesn't help that I mostly see contact lens websites repeating this "fact." of course all contacts produce plastic waste, and I'd be perfectly willing to accept this as one of those You Have To Consume; You Just Decide What Areas Of Your Life Are Optimal For Minimization of Waste And What Aren't things, if dailies weren't being pushed so hard
(also I found two studies showing that monthly-replacement soft lenses produce less plastic waste than daily disposables. which, like. yes, this should be obvious, but here we are. granted, that's only two, and both studies emphasize that dailies and their accoutrements can be recycled, but see below)
some big companies have "contact recycling programs" but like. who's to say that's not greenwashing? where's the oversight? where are the investigations into what these programs actually DO? god knows we've been there before with recycling and corporations trying to pull the nylon-poly-blend Vegan Wool(TM) over our eyes
they're also more expensive than monthlies, which like. does not lend a positive slant to optometrists pushing them so stridently
on top of that, I and some other monthly users have noted that our contacts aren't lasting as long as they used to. for me, it was 17-18 years of smooth sailing with barely any problems, and as of like a year ago my contacts barely last two weeks without clouding up, ripping, chipping at the edges, causing my vision to blur, becoming uncomfortable...my brand did change around that time, so I hope it's just that, and the sample size of other monthly users I've pooled is VERY small. but it sure seems interesting that they suddenly started pushing a product that doesn't last long enough for people to notice low quality, around the time that at least some users of the longer-lasting version start having problems
you're pooh-poohing all of my concerns- which are indeed backed up by science, it seems! -with a "fix" that relies on big companies being honest about recycling, to push me from a non-ideal but still medically sound option to another that makes you more money?
I'm normally a pretty grounded person but I'm full-on tinfoil hat about this one
#contact lenses#conspiracy theories#I mean is 'corporations will screw you over for more money' really a conspiracy theory at this point?
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Can I make a request with smut and angst and a happy ending???
Reader has a crush with jk since they were young (they were neighbors growing up). Now they are 26 yo.Taehyung throws this party and they both attend.
She hears him talking with his friends about how he never liked her and was just close to her because he helped him study and their parents were friends. But in reality he likes her, he was trying to play it cool.When oc hears that she runs off.
A few days later she meets with Yoongi (an old friend, they had a fling a while ago) at her house and he holds her in his arms.
One thing leads to another and they fuck (could you please add some nasty smut?????) While they are doing it, Jungkook barges in (he has her house keys and was worried because she doesn't reply to his texts) and sees them, but they don't stop.
happy ending with Yoongi????
The new and the ex
a/n: First of all, I want to apologize if the smut is not as nasty as you thought, I have never written anything like this before. Second, thanks for sending your request, I really got excited when you put that you wanted a happy ending with Yoongi, I wanted that too lol. Warnings: MDNI, fingering, hair pullling, a slightly jealous/possessive Yoongi, Jungkook being an idiot for wanting to make himself look good, a casual joke during sex (sorry, I swear it's unintentional), choking. wc: 5k
"Have you guys really never had anything? I always thought you were a couple, or at least liked each other," Namjoon muttered, sipping some of the cheap alcohol from his plastic cup. His brow was furrowed and his head was barely tilted to one side.
"Of course not" laughed Jungkook, shaking his head, "Y/N and I have always been just friends, what's more, if it wasn't for our parents I wouldn't have even approached her, we don't have similar tastes, you know?".
Namjoon and Hoseok shared a look. Neither of them understood the situation between the two of you very well, but it definitely didn't seem like nothing. The two of you were inseparable. You always hung out together, always walked hand in hand, even on more than one occasion you were seen almost kissing, so why would Jungkook say that?
Well, you were asking the same question.
You squeezed the two cups you had in your hands, not caring if your hands would end up sticky and smelling of beer. You walked to the nearest dumpster you could find, threw them there and stared at the one with Jungkook's name on it. You had even put a bunny on it. It took you a few seconds to react and realise how strange it looked that you were standing in front of a trash can looking at its contents. You probably looked like you wanted to throw up, which wasn't far from the truth. Your stomach felt upset and your eyes stung enough to make you blink faster.
“Y/N” Taehyung approached you with a big smile on his face. He was holding a girl by the hand. You'd never seen her before, and you couldn't care less.
"Taehyung" you muttered, shifting in your place. You wanted to get out of here as soon as possible, but you also didn't want to ruin his party.
"I was looking for you, I wanted to introduce you to someone" he smiled big, pulling the girl to his side and putting her almost on top of you. You were a little surprised at how small she was. "This is my girlfriend, Soomin, she also comes from Daegu, I was so surprised when she told me".
"It's a pleasure" she smiled, offering you her hand. You didn't hesitate to take it. She was as well not to blame for your desire to disappear from here as soon as possible. "Have we met before? Your face looks so familiar”.
"I'm sorry, I really don't remember seeing you before," you smiled through tight lips. You looked at the exit door out of the corner of your eye. It wasn't that far away, maybe, if you told him you were going to the bathroom, you'd have a chance to get out of there. Yeah, it sounded like a good plan. "Excuse me, do you mind if I go to the bathroom?", you shifted your gaze from Taehyung to Soomin, waiting for a response from either of them.
To your surprise, Soomin covered Taehyung's mouth just as he was about to reply, "No problem, take your time."
"Thank you" you smiled weakly, camouflaging yourself among the sweaty, joyful bodies dancing to a shitty song that didn't even seem to be made for dancing. It took you a while to get to the yard of Taehyung's house, there were a lot of people in the way and it was too difficult to pass without touching anyone.
A shiver ran through your body as you felt the cold winter air hit your bare arms. Usually Jungkook was the one who brought a jacket for you, and if he didn't, he'd give you his. Fuck Jungkook, you thought, you didn't even need him that much, the car you had come in was yours anyway, and you had the keys to it.
You were walking around for a good few minutes trying to find your car. You almost cried with excitement when you saw it on the other side of the street. You ran towards it, unlocked the door and got in as fast as you could. You let out a sigh of relief when you were finally out of the cold.
The first thing you did was turn on the heater, blowing air into your hands in an attempt to warm them. You turned towards the passenger seat, and it wasn't until you noticed Jungkook's jacket that you burst into tears.
You felt so stupid, how could you think you could ever have anything? Just because he was nice to you? Surely he had many girls much nicer than you by his side. You were just his childhood friend, that person he would never consider as a woman.
You felt like you threw away more than 20 years of your life.
You cleaned your cheeks with your forearm, starting the engine so you could go home.
You were taking the third tub of ice cream out of your fridge when your phone started vibrating. The thought of Jungkook texting made you nervous. Had he noticed you were missing from the party?
You picked up your phone carefully, turning on the screen and checking your inbox. You were surprised to see that the person who was writing to you wasn't even part of your contacts. You decided to check the messages without opening them.
xxx: "Hi, this is Soomin, we spoke a while ago, remember?”
xxx: "Sorry to bother you again, but I really needed to talk to you urgently."
You opened the messages. Your curiosity won out over any other emotion. Besides, maybe she had something to tell you that would distract you enough to forget how bad you were feeling right now.
When you opened the messages, a photo was the first thing that appeared on your screen. You'd be lying if you said you weren't surprised to see it. How did she get it?
xxx: "I had a music tutor in Daegu, he taught me how to play the piano”
xxx: "His name is Min Yoongi, he had some pictures with some of his students on a shelf, that's you in the picture, aren’t you?”
You were a little hesitant to respond. You hadn't spoken to Yoongi in months, you were surprised that he still had that photo in his office. It had been taken after you won first place in a piano competition. You were so proud of that achievement.
"What difference does it make? It's just a picture," you whispered to yourself. According to what the girl had said, the two of them weren't friends, so they had probably cut off contact, just like you did with Yoongi after you moved here.
"Yes, it's me, I can't believe I still have that picture lol 😂"
You sent the message, feeling your heart in your throat as you saw the three dots.
xxx: "I knew I'd seen you somewhere else 🙂"
You took a second to think the situation through, why would Taehyung's girlfriend talk to you? The topic was important, right? It was the first thing she wrote in her message, so why was she asking you about a picture from a few years ago?
xxx: "Yoongi is coming to Seoul on holidays, why don't you two get together and talk? If you are who I think you are, I'm sure he'd love to get together with you and catch up!".
You went blank. Although at least now you understood why she was texting you. Would Yoongi have told her about his relationship with you? No, you couldn't even call what you had a relationship, it was barely a few months, most of the time you just had sex and then went back to their normal lives. Maybe you went out on a date or two, but nothing beyond that.
xxx: "It's probably strange what I'm telling you, I'm sorry 😣"
You bit your nail as you noticed that Soomin had sent you a phone number.
xxx: "That's his number, in case you want to talk to him!"
You weren't quite sure how you ended up crying on Yoongi's shoulder as you told him how your childhood love and ex-best friend had just broken your heart a week ago and was still going about his business as usual while you sank into your misery, and a ridiculous amount of ice cream and sweets, but that was exactly was going on.
"I swear, he said it so obnoxiously," you sobbed, taking one of the tissues from the box in his lap and blowing your nose, "And in front of our friends! How am I supposed to look them in the face now? They all knew I liked him, or at least I think they did, I don't know".
You threw the tissue on the table, where another overwhelming amount of papers were lying.
"Y/N" he muttered, pulling out another tissue and using it to gently wipe your cheeks, "You need to calm down a bit, unless you have another box of tissues to spare."
"No, this is the last one" you looked at Yoongi, "I'm sorry, am I being too annoying? This is exactly why I didn't want to call you" you shook your hair, avoiding looking at Yoongi, "You always look at me with that look that makes me want to spit out all the shit that happens in my life. I really hate that, you know?"
"It's fine, I don't mind" he shrugged, setting the box down on the side of the couch you were both sitting on, "Just like I don't mind listening to all the shit that goes on in your life" he smiled briefly at you, his eyes locked on yours, "I missed listening to you in general."
"Really?" you muttered, feeling your heart pounding against your ribs hard.
Jungkook was your childhood love, but Yoongi? Yoongi was something else entirely. You couldn't say for sure that what you felt for him was love, but it would definitely be a lie to say that you never felt anything for him.
At first it was just physical attraction, on both our parts. Yoongi was so quiet and mature compared to what you were used to seeing, he seemed to know so much about everything, it was impossible not to be at least curious about him. You, on the other hand, were much more outgoing than he was; you were definitely like a breath of fresh air in Yoongi's life, someone he knew he could trust and tell things to without filters.
Even though the whole time you were together you were never sure how you felt about him, he always knew how he felt about you. He loved you then, he loved you in the time when you disappeared, and he loved you right now, even if you had only called him to vent about your broken heart.
"Of course I do," he said as he moved closer to you. It was only a few inches, but it was enough for both of your shoulders to touch. "How could I not? You're so... so you" he laughed softly, caressing your cheek with his knuckles.
Almost unconsciously you leaned into his touch. You were surprised that, despite how long it had been since you last saw each other, his touch still sent an electric current through your body. You were unaware of how much you missed him until this moment.
"What kind of answer is that? Is that supposed to be a good thing?" you laughed teasingly, leaning a little closer to him. You could have sworn there was some kind of string drawing you to him.
"It's a hell of a lot better than good," he moved his hand down to stop at your neck, stroking the skin behind your ear with his thumb.
You smiled helplessly as you noticed how his eyes had dropped to linger on your lips.
"Do you want to kiss me, Yoonie?" you asked, running your hand up his arm until you reached his shoulder.
"I want to fuck you" his gaze returned to your eyes, this time it seemed darker, more intense. You shivered a little at it.
Has he always been this direct?
"Here?" you murmured, feeling Yoongi's nose brush against yours. You couldn't help but hold your breath for a few moments.
"I can take you to your bed if you want, or would you prefer the kitchen?" he replied teasingly, kissing the corner of your lip. You closed your eyes, leaning even closer to him.
"I prefer my room, maybe next time it can be in the kitchen," you laughed softly, pulling Yoongi up to kiss him.
Kissing with him had always been rather slow and gentle, lazy even. He liked to savor every corner of your mouth, leaving you breathless and wanting so much more. That was how it had always worked so far at least.
You moaned softly the moment Yoongi slipped his tongue into your mouth, kissing you as if he was desperate. And he was. He hadn't had any contact with you for over four months after having a relationship that was too intimate to be forgotten overnight. Shit, he was still dreaming about you being under him, moaning and begging him to move harder because you were desperate to come.
He hadn't lied when he said he missed hearing you, he just left out the part where he made it clear that it was your moans that he had missed the most.
"Hold tight," he whispered into your shoulder, grabbing your thighs and lifting you into his arms. "Where's your room?"
"Second floor, back door" you took advantage of your position so you could kiss his shoulder, leaving a mark or two on his skin. You smiled as you noticed that his skin was still as sensitive as ever.
Yoongi climbed the stairs as carefully as he could, trying not to let you bump into anything.
You probably would have appreciated the detail if you weren't too busy nibbling on his neck.
It took him a while to open your door while you were still in his arms, but eventually he did. He came in as fast as he could, throwing you onto the bed as soon as he set foot in the room.
You squealed as you bounced on the bed, propping yourself up on your forearms to see Yoongi. He had started to take off his shirt. You were a little offended to see that he had no intention of letting you help him take it off.
For a second you thought you heard the sound of the front door closing, but the fact that Yoongi was shirtless in front of you was enough to make you let it go. It was probably the neighbors, you thought.
Yoongi threw his shirt back, not realizing that one of the pictures you had hanging on your wall was in the way. You both turned to look in its direction as you heard the glass shatter.
"Sorry, I didn't see that," he muttered, trying to get closer to it to pick it up quickly so he could continue without interruption. You stopped him, grabbing his wrist tightly.
"Leave it, it was getting old anyway, I've been wanting to change it for a while". You tugged at it until it was over you, completely covering your body.
"If you say so" he laughed softly, slipping his hands under your shirt and pulling them up until they were on your breasts. "I'm not stopping now, honey, so I hope what you said is true."
Jungkook took one last glance at his phone before he looked back at the door of your house. He bit his lower lip, hesitating whether to knock on the door or just open it with his keys. He looked at his cell phone again. You hadn't answered any of his messages for a week. At first he thought maybe you were a little sick, so he decided to give you space, but a whole week without talking to him? Whenever you got sick you always sent him a message asking him to buy you medicine, now you hadn't even done that. He was too worried.
He took a breath of air, reminding himself that he was only doing this to see if you were okay and if you needed anything. He pulled out his copy of your house key and opened the door. The first thing he noticed when he walked in were shoes that were much bigger than yours. They were black and looked fairly new. He frowned, trying to remember if you had any relatives or friends with such big feet.
He shook his head, reminding himself that this was not the important thing at the moment. He advanced into the living room, grimacing at the sight of dozens of tissues strewn everywhere. For a second he thought he was right and that you were just too sick to speak or write. His doubts were soon answered just after the sound of glass breaking against the floor alerted him.
He ran up the stairs, approaching your room.
His pace slowed as he got closer, remembering the shoes from earlier.
His heartbeat began to ring in his ears, booming so loudly that it was almost the only thing he could hear.
"I'm not going to stop now, honey, so I hope what you said is true," he heard a man say.
He had to swallow the knot in his throat to keep from making a sound. He took just a few more steps, just enough to see into your room. The nausea was almost instantaneous as the guy with the big shoes kissed your neck and slipped his hands under your shirt. Nor did it go unnoticed as you arched your back to get closer to his touch, as your lips parted, letting out soft whimpers and moans.
He ran his hand over his face, rubbing his eyes and stepping back clumsily. He wanted to erase that image from his head, but it was so hard to forget, especially when he could still hear you moaning for that guy. He turned around, walking down the stairs much more cautiously than at the beginning. He didn't want you to know he was here, that he had just seen you in a situation like that.
He turned around one last time, looking at the stairs in silence. He needed some air, and lots of beer.
"Yoongi" you gasped, gripping his shoulders tightly. At this point you cared little and nothing about hurting him.
"What?" he laughed teasingly, settling his fingers inside you. He'd forgotten how tight you were, how you'd made him in the past to take his cock? "Is that too much for you? When was the last time you fucked anyone? Was it me? Was it your little friend there?"
You weren't listening with full concentration to what he was telling you, you were too busy trying not to think about the stinging you were getting from feeling his fingers moving in and out of you in a slow but rough rhythm. You almost screamed when he separated them while still inside you.
"Why don't you answer? It's just my fingers," he murmured, his voice a little deeper than usual. His free hand took care of removing your shirt to free your tits. You couldn't help but lick your lips at the sight of them. "They're so beautiful" he whispered to himself, squeezing your right breast tightly, smiling as he heard you squeal, "and so sensitive, do you still play with them like you used to when we were together?"
"Y-yes" you groaned, clinging to Yoongi's wrist. He seriously knew how to use his long, cool fingers to his advantage.
"Who do you think of when you do that?" he moved down until he was face to face with your tits, starting to give little licks around your nipples.
"Does it matter?" you buried your nails in his wrist, trying to move your hips against his hand. It was starting to make you desperate how slow he was.
"Of course" he stuck a third finger inside you. From then on his pace only increased to the point where you needed to hold on to something to stay conscious. "Would you like me to fuck you thinking about someone else? I know you haven't done this with him before, he hasn't even kissed you, you may have touched yourself while thinking about him, but remembering the sensations I gave you," he bit one of your nipples, tugging at it with his teeth. It was much less delicate than you were used to. "And you don't know how annoying it is to think about you just using me, so yeah, I'd seriously like to hear who the fuck you were thinking about when you were touching yourself like I was."
You looked down, trying to see what Yoongi's expression was. You couldn't see much beyond his hair slightly stuck to his forehead. You thought about asking him about it, about trying to understand why he sounded so jealous, but it was hard to talk when his fingers kept moving inside you mercilessly.
"I did it with you in mind," you finally answered his question, feeling the knot in your stomach grow more and more unbearable. Yoongi might be being a little more rude than usual, but that didn't take away from the fact that he was still making you feel just as good as all the times before.
"Fuck" he growled under his breath, pulling his fingers out of you. you took that moment to try to calm down a bit.
You almost choked on your saliva when you saw Yoongi lick his fingers covered in your juices. "You're making it hard for me to control myself."
"Then don't" you whispered, taking Yoongi's hand and kissing his knuckles. This time it was he who was surprised to see you sucking on the same fingers he had dipped into you and licked. "I don't mind."
"Shit," he mumbled through his teeth, rubbing his member over his pants. You'd just given him a free pass to do whatever he wanted, hadn't you? or had he just misunderstood? "Are you sure?"
You leaned closer to him, taking his belt between your hands and removing it easily. You knew that specific one very well. "Very sure," you smiled at him, unbuttoning his pants and holding the waistband of them to pull them down.
"Wait," he held your wrists carefully, slipping a hand into the back pocket of his pants. You were quite surprised to see that he had a condom in it. "Now, where were we?" he finished removing his pants and underwear, leaving you in the same state as you.
Sometimes you seriously forgot how big this man was.
"You had a condom on? Really?" you teased him, lying down on the bed as he settled on top of you, "did you come with intentions of catching up or to fuck me?".
"I can do both at the same time" he opened the condom, taking it out and placing it over his member carefully, "Don't you think it's sexy to ask you how your work has been going while I pull on your hair and shove my cock all the way in?"
You laughed loudly, slapping his waist playfully, "I thought I was the only one who had that wet dream, I'm glad there are two of us."
You watched as a small smile formed on his lips as he rolled your body over until you were face down. You felt a shiver run down your back the second Yoongi began to leave marks on your shoulders and back.
"I missed you" he whispered against your skin, pressing his member against your entrance. You moaned softly as he ran his tip all over your femininity. "I missed hearing you scream my name." You thought maybe he would enter a bit at a time, just like all the other times you'd had sex. To your surprise, he didn't hesitate for a second to thrust his entire member in one thrust.
You didn't need any more to scream his name.
"Yes, just like that" he smiled, sticking his chest against your back, starting to ram into you hard. Each thrust was even deeper and faster than the last, and each one hit your sensitive spot. He knew your body so well, perhaps even better than you did. "I love the sound of your moans."
"Th-thank you" you laughed between moans, squealing as you felt Yoongi's hand pull your hair tightly. Your head was now resting on his shoulder and he had full access to your neck. He didn't hesitate to take advantage of that.
With the hand he still had free he decided to tease your sensitive clitoris, squeezing and pulling on it mercilessly. You trembled violently in his arms as he did so.
"See how you tremble," he growled teasingly, tugging at your hair again. He was fascinated by the sight. He loved seeing your tear streaked face and saliva running down the corner of your mouth. He knew that meant he was doing it right. "You've gotten so much more sensitive," he kissed your shoulder, letting go of your hair and resting his hand on your lower belly, smiling proudly as he felt his member bump against his hand across your skin. "You're so cute, drooling at the way I fuck you, I love it."
You moaned softly, squeezing his cock unconsciously. It felt so good to have him inside you again.
Yoongi grunted softly in response, lifting you off the bed and resting you on his chest. You gasped as you felt his hand gently squeeze your neck. He hadn't applied pressure, but you still felt yourself running out of air.
"Did you like that, honey? Is that why you squeezed my cock? Or is it because you want to come?" whispered Yoongi in your ear. You couldn't help but squirm. You felt so sensitive that just the brush of his lips against your neck made you drip on his cock. It was really embarrassing.
"Both of them" you looked at Yoongi from the corner of your eye. Shuddering as you felt his member bump more uncontrollably against your sensitive spot. "It felt so fucking good and..." you closed your eyes, resting your head on his shoulder, trying to regulate your breathing. "I seriously feel like I'm close. Shit" you moaned as soon as Yoongi pulled on your clit hard again.
"Then just come" he gently bites your ear, moving the hand he had on your belly up to your chest. At no point did he separate it from your body. "I've got you."
You relaxed a little at hearing him say that, but that moment of peace didn't last long.
His grip on your neck became slightly tighter, as did his thrusts. They were getting messier and rougher.
"Yoongi" you moaned, clinging to his wrist. You bite down hard on your inner lip, feeling your legs tremble uncontrollably.
He seemed to get your message. His finger began to roll over your clit, crushing it hard. The movement was pleasurable enough to cause the knot in your belly to untie and you cum hard on his cock.
You almost cried when you felt Yoongi keep ramming even after you had just had your orgasm.
"Just hold on a little longer, honey, just a little longer, you're doing it perfect" he whispered in your ear, moaning more and more desperately.
You were shaking uncontrollably as you felt his cock touch your G-spot again. You were still too sensitive, it burned to feel his member hit so deep. At least it was a pleasurable pain.
Yoongi's arms came down to wrap around your waist, clinging to you as if his life depended on it. It was only then that you noticed his cock twisting inside you as he released his cum into the condom.
Yoongi pulled out of you a few seconds after he finished. You were both panting, and you barely managed to stay upright when Yoongi let go of your waist.
"I can't feel my legs," you laughed between breathless gasps, closing your eyes and letting the exhaustion slowly consume you.
"I'm sorry," Yoongi said, leaning back against you and resting his head on your chest.
"You're not sorry" you murmured with a smile, stroking his hair lazily.
"I'm not" he nodded, leaving a soft kiss on your collarbone.
You moaned with satisfaction, resting your head on Yoongi's chest.
"Buying a house with a bathtub was the best decision we've ever made," you took the sponge off the table, poured some soap on it and started rubbing it against your boyfriend's skin, "don't you think?
Yoongi just nodded, letting you clean his arm with the sponge. "I think next time we should get some candles. I walked past a shop the other day and saw that they were selling strawberry scented ones".
"Yes!" you turned to look at him, giving him the biggest smile you could. "I saw them too, but I wanted to ask you before I bought them."
Yoongi's hands floated to your waist, drawing invisible circles on your bare skin. "Let's go buy some tomorrow."
You nodded quickly, turning around so you could sit on his lap. "You're really sweet, you know that?" you giggled softly, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling your face close to his.
"I really don't understand why you think that," he murmured, resting his forehead against yours.
He closed his eyes as the smell of your shampoo hit his nostrils. He loved that smell, it was so good on you.
You kissed him softly, stroking his wet hair with your fingertips. "You know exactly why I say that, Yoonie," you hummed against his lips.
He just smiled, bringing his nose to yours, "Whatever you say," he whispered, kissing your forehead.
You couldn't help but feel an immense warmth flood your chest. You would definitely never regret contacting him a few years ago. It was the best damn decision you'd ever made in your life.
Materlist.
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EDIT: please see @cliffsideview's replies for more info! Tragically it is sounding more probable that it was a suicide spurred by a long period of bullying. Every person who participated, every teacher who stood by, every legislator who is a proponent of the anti-trans bills – every one of them is complicit in Nex's death. Ryan Walters specifically has blood on his hands.
They're ruling Nex Benedict's death a suicide. Death due to "combined toxicity" of fluoxetine (Prozac) and diphenhydramine (benadryl). Let's explore this.
Fluoxetine is known to cause seizures at very high dosages but rarely causes death. In one case study, 1.4 grams of Prozac likely caused a seizure but not death in an adult woman. "A dose as low as 520 mg of fluoxetine has been associated with a lethal outcome, but there’s record of someone taking 8 grams of fluoxetine and recovering," according to Healthline. ("Associated with" does not necessarily mean the sole cause!) Diphenhydramine overdose has been known to cause death at doses of 20mg/kg or greater; in the USA in 2017, it was involved (but not necessarily the sole factor) in 3% of OD deaths according to the CDC. I've no clue how much Nex weighed but I based my math on a 100lb person. A lethal dose of diphenhydramine at that weight would have been approx 900mg. There is no known lethal dose of fluoxetine for humans. It can vary greatly but is generally safe and generally requires very large doses to cause seizures let alone death. There are no known serious drug interactions between these two drugs.
But let's say there is some interaction at unusually high doses that I don't know about because this is an extremely unusual combination for a suicide attempt. We know that Benadryl is much easier to OD on than Prozac is. So let's pull some numbers out of our asses and say 750mg of diphenhydramine plus 3g of fluoxetine equals lethal dose for a 100lb teenager.
The typical upper range of fluoxetine dosage is 80mg/day. If we assume that Nex was taking 100mg of fluoxetine/day and he had access to a full 30 day supply, that's 3 grams. Add confounding head trauma and diphenhydramine toxicity and...maybe???
But we're talking about someone downing a full or nearly full 30 day supply of high doses of fluoxetine AND about 30 tablets of Benadryl. And there were no signs until he entered the living room and collapsed? Fluoxetine toxicity can cause rapid heartbeat, irritability, nausea, vomiting, dizziness, etc. Diphenhydramine toxicity can cause confusion, irregular heartbeat, agitation, nausea, vomiting, etc. This combo seems like a very uncomfortable and unpleasant way to go and I'm meant to believe he was quiet, not vomiting, not agitated, not terrified – just walked into the living room and collapsed? Unless he was exhibiting those symptoms and Sue didn't say anything about it which doesn't add up either. She said Nex went to bed with a headache and we have audio of the 911 call. She mentions their eyes rolling back and their hands "posturing" (both those things could be related to brain damage or a seizure).
With the added complication of head trauma (blacking out due to head injury = concussion = brain injury), I guess death is feasible but this just doesn't feel right. I don't know. Maybe it was a perfect storm of circumstances but those two drugs are so hard to OD on, not to mention unpleasant to OD on, and this state is so hostile to trans people it's hard not to approach this with a TON of skepticism.
I hope the Benedict family had their own toxicology and autopsy done.
ETA: for the record, im not saying I agree with the suicide decision, I'm saying "I mean I guess technically it's possible but it seems highly unlikely and incredibly sus and I am not convinced"
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Moments Before Dinner Time
pairing: sanguinius x reader (fem.)
warnings: none
notes: possible ooc. sequal to this english isnt englishing today im eepy and sad over sanguinius being dead instead of studying for my chemistry quiz
His dreams failed to do you justice. Your laughter sounded even more beautiful in reality.
Your laughter was neither soft nor sounded like the elegant chime of bells, instead, it was loud, brash and unrestrained. Some would deem it improper and unbefitting of someone of your status but to Sanguinius? It was perfect.
It was you, the real you, the one you've hidden so well and the one he wants to know better.
But he has not seen you since the… incident at the bath.
And it has been days.
As hopes of a conversation waned by the hour, he eventually found himself standing at the front of your door, unsure whether or not to knock. The flowery skull carvings at the door burn holes into the Primarch as if to say ‘You fool.’ and he realises he has not been in this area of the ship since the wedding.
The wedding.
It had been months since then.
His heart sinks.
Months have passed since your union, since your soul was tied to his and he had not visited since. Sanguinius had known that he would not be the best husband the moment this marriage was thrust upon him. His status as a Primarch entailed a heavy responsibility and an authority that guaranteed that virtually any relation he should pursue would never be on equal terms. Not to mention that opening his heart to another is a separate can of worms on its own and—
“My Lord?”
The door is now open.
He looks down and sees you dressed in linen robes and with your hair styled in a simple braid. It’s the simplest thing he’s seen you wear since your first meeting.
“My Lord?” You call out again with the barest hint of impatience in your tone.
“Ye-Es?” His voice cracked pathetically.
“Is something the matter?”
“No. Nothing.” Other than him being terrible at marriage that is.
“I see. If that is the case, can you please move? You…have been blocking the doorway for quite some time now.”
Awkwardly, he complies.
You exit your room, head held high and exuding the grace of a noblewoman. From his left, he hears the telltale hiss of the door being shut and out scurries a woman, face hidden by the hood of her servant’s robes. Hurriedly, the servant trails behind you and eventually slows down to match your stride from exactly two steps behind.
As your footsteps echo around the hall his mind screams at him to do something, to walk, to follow, to do something, to –
“Where are you going?”
–And that…that sounded rude. Great going Sanguinius! You are slowly proving Magnus’ theory that you are somehow part avian!
Turning to face him you crane your neck to meet his eyes. “To the dining hall, My Lord.” You state taciturnly, “It is dinner time.”
“Then I will join you,” he offers and quickly adds “…if you do not mind that is.”
You all but raise your brow at the incredulity of his words, but nonetheless, you reply, “Very well,” and look to your maidservant, speaking to her in your mother tongue. The woman whispers something in return, to which you shake your head no before she continues walking down the hall, this time in a speedier manner.
Sighing, you explain. “I assumed you would be joining me so I sent her to the kitchens to have something prepared for you. I hope you do not mind eating a similar meal.”
“I do not mind.” He confirms with a small smile as he manoeuvres himself to stand by your side, careful to avoid accidentally swathing you with a wing. “What are we having for dinner?”
“A…simple stew. It is my homeworld’s equivalent of hunter’s stew and it is…my favorite.” One of your hands fiddles with an intricate gold ring on your finger, “I am aware it is considered peasant food. I–”
Sensing your nervousness Sanguinius interrupts, “I do not mind, still.” Mentally, he takes note of your favorite meal, “I, myself have grown up on simpler meals.”
“Really?!” You exclaim. It’s the most unrestrained he’s heard your voice get.
“Yes,” Most of the imperial nobility would hardly call dried meat, dates, the occasional edible plant and whatever else they could find on the wastelands of Baal ‘meals’ but the Blood made do. Wistfully, Sanguinius remembers how the elders in the tribe had insisted he ate more. “I grew up among nomads.”
“I…I did not know that. I–”
“Please don’t apologise.”
“Still–”
“You were not aware.”
“Being unaware is no…” you pause briefly, trying to find the right words in Gothic. “No excuse to make assumptions about a person!” You continue in the most restrained rant Sanguinius has ever bore witness to and as you spoke your accent slowly revealed itself, becoming thicker and thicker by the syllable.
And for the second time in this hour, Sanguinius realises something—well, two things.
One is that he’s married a stubborn woman and two, she could be briefly placated by putting a hand over her head.
“Then, would you like to know more?” He asks It’s both a question and an offer, one that he hopes you would say yes to.
“What?” Confusion is more than evident in your eyes so he reiterates.
“You appear in distress in knowing little about me and I know as much about you so would you like to know more?”
“I–Yes but it would be unfair if you are the only one sharing, yes?” There’s a look in your eyes, the same one he’d caught a brief glimpse of when he first saw you, when he had yet to put a name to your face.
It was a challenge.
“Yes,” He grins, “it would be unfair.”
“Then I would like to share too. However, I will only share as many facts or stories as you would.” Of course. Sanguinius might have known little about you but he knew that you were not the type to make deals without a compromise favorable to you.
But that is something Sanguinius doesn’t mind.
“Deal.”
You could say it is something he looks forward to
And with that the Bride and the Angel, side by side head to dinner. The stew was barely warm by the time husband and wife sat down but the couple were too entrenched in conversation to notice.
This would be the first of countless dinners of the same nature forever preserved by Remembrancers.
#warhammer x reader#wh40k x reader#warhammer 40k x reader#sanguinius x reader#primarch x reader#sanguinius#ngl gang i feel like i just drank up all of nurgle's weird soup rn#3 hours before the exam im so cooked
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I have this problem where I am hyper aware of the smell of specifically my mom’s sweat/discharge. It isn’t like this for anyone else, but to me I can always smell it whenever I am around my mom or if she has been sitting somewhere for a while and it really reeks to me, like to an unbearable level. Nobody else in the house has complained about this and I’m made out to be this hateful spiteful bully for always telling her she smells and that she leaves smells wherever she sits. Idk what to do anymore, help??? Why am I the only one who can seemingly smell it? Why is it only hers that I smell??
So, this is really far out of my wheelhouse and has nothing to do with my field of study but I still feel compelled to answer this.
My first thought here is that constantly telling someone that you think they stink, especially in front of other people, is very rude and hurtful. Even if it's true.
I think the way you're going about this, "always" telling her you think she stinks and around other people is actually very unkind and that's probably why people think you're trying to be a bully. That can be very humiliating and awful to constantly hear.
Even if someone stinks, that's often not something to comment on. It can be okay if you're with a family member, or someone you're close to, and you think they'd want to know, so you pull them aside and tell them maybe they need some deodorant.
Even sometimes, especially during puberty, a sibling might not smell the greatest. That doesn't mean you can tell them that all the time. Sometimes it means you give them some hygiene tips but often it means you wait it out, maybe spray some cleaning stuff sometimes. Sometimes people stink.
But the way you're going about it isn't like that in the least and you're describing how awful this is for you and how you're being blamed for saying these things but what you're describing is also happening to your mother. You don't mention once how she's reacted, how she feels about this, what she's said in response, etc, at all.
It sounds like this situation might be far worse for her to be experiencing, Anon.
It might not even be sweat you're smelling. It could be a soap or perfume she wears that smells bad to you.
Regardless of what it is, the way you're going about it sounds hurtful and it also sounds like you're not being very thoughtful about how this might be affecting her.
I think this could be solved much better if you try to figure out when this issue started, figure out if this is a hygiene issue or just a perfume type issue-
If it's hygiene, it's possible it's a health issue, which is not necessarily something that can be helped beyond you not shaming her constantly for it. If it might be perfume, ask if you can check out what soaps and possible perfume or whatever she uses.
That doesn't necessarily mean you'll be able to "fix" it, given she's allowed to wear what she wants, even if you don't like the smell, but it would clear up the mystery.
But if you can't figure it out respectfully and while being kind, then its an issue where you just need to mind your own business. Either way, it sounds like you really need to apologize to your mom.
I can't tell you exactly what's going on here but that's my thoughts. Not sure how helpful they are tbh, like I said, this is not my wheelhouse.
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Bloom's Taxonomy: A 6 step guide to improve your learning
I am so excited to be back!!! I hope you all enjoy this because it has been helpful in my self-development journey.
Remember: When reading a paragraph, a chapter or even a book. It is important to know why you are reading it and if you were assigned this reading, you need to know what is expected of you. With his in mind, endeavor to read, retain and recall the information. This looks like take a pauses to recall what you have learned. You will not remember exactly what you read but you will notice some gaps, so back to you reading and figure what the missing parts.
Understand: Try to make meaning of what you have remembered. Explain it to yourself, write it in simpler terms, ask yourself questions on this. if you memorized the definition of photosynthesis as "the process by which plants and certain bacteria use sunlight, water, and carbon dioxide to create oxygen and sugar (glucose). Try to describe this definition to a sibling or someone who has no idea what it means. if possible watch a video that visually describes the process. Understanding goes beyond regurgitating. Because you can only begin to apply what you have learned only when you understand. It is also at this point that you will encounter difficulties especially if the subject is dense and complicated. Use the resources at your disposal and ask questions.
Apply: Use what you know already about the subject in this new context. Back to my photosynthesis example, what do you already know already and pose that as a question. Does photosynthesis have anything to do with the color of leaves? If it needs sunshine, then what happens when there is barely any sun? Let's try this for a subject as esoteric as physics. "Electromagnetism is the physical interaction among electric charges, magnetic moments, and electromagnetic fields." I do not know enough about electromagnetism but I know that Tesla is an electric car. Wouldn't it be fun to quickly google whether electromagnetism is applied to Tesla's engineering? This step is crucial because you are using a familiar object in an unfamiliar territory. (This is very simplified and studying physics isn't as easy as I portray it. This is only a guide )
Analyze: When analyzing, you want to explore the similarities and differences you have noticed in your readings. How do two seemingly different authors give a unique perspective to the subject you are reading? Can you categorize which information is relevant or not? Can you organize your thoughts and ideas into relevance parts, assuming you'd have to one day share what you have learned? When contradictions can you spot? What outliers exist in some the data you have analyzed, and can you come up with some hypothetical answers?
Evaluate: This is the time to look at two differing sources to support your argument. It is also the time to build the skill of critically reading a book or an article to figure out the author's main idea and evaluate their supporting arguments. Now, this sounds very academic but you can do this even when you are reading a novel and you want to get a grasp of life in that time period. Pay attention to the events, this will give you an idea of the cultural and political climate of that time period. You further may your own judgement. For instance "I think character A in book X was married off as a 14 year old because mother's were accustomed to get the their daughter ready for marriage once the hit puberty in X country."
Create: This is the right time to use all you have learned to create something new. Perhaps a personal philosophy? An article explaining why you think ketchup is the best invention of the 19th century? By creating, you also go through the process of self evaluation. You ask yourself "did I really learn enough?" Often times we get stuck trying to find the perfect thing to say, the right topic to discuss, the right response to give your professor, or the right book to right. Often times, the right creation is anything that you found interesting. it is you ability to frame that interest of yours that sets you apart and inevitably brings you both success and critiques. Keep creating in your own way.
Enjoy!!!
#self improvement#self love#mindfulness#growth#self development#classy#educateyourself#education#biography#books#self control#self discipline#self worth#emotional intelligence
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[part thirteen] to build a home - gojo satoru
word count: 5.6k warnings: !!manga spoilers!! swearing, jjk-verse style fighting series summary: when (y/n) (y/l/n) catches wind that the notorious sorcerer killer, toji fushiguro, has children, she makes it her personal mission to find them. the catch being she couldn't tell a soul about them- the risk of the zen'in clan learning about them was too great. keeping the secret isn't the hard part, it's lying to her friends, shoko ieiri, geto suguru, and of course gojo satoru, that she struggles with. especially when satoru has suddenly become so keen on keeping an eye on her lately.
series masterlist
[part thirteen] : “Melt My Soul” ___
How long after a traumatic incident does your body begin to process it? A minute? A day? Or was it the very moment the incident took place?
Does the soul know that this event was going to change the body forever? Or is it the body that processes the trauma the quickest, in order to protect the soul from the impending pain and grief?
It feels as though someone had drilled into (y/n’s) bones, and filled them with metal. Quick hardening, heavy, toxic metal. It keeps her trapped in place, stuck.
So stuck, she glances down to study the concrete of the sidewalk, just to see if there was a curse there keeping her put, or cement being poured over her feet.
But no, there was nothing holding her in place. It was simply her own mind, processing the scene before her too slowly for any of her other bodily functions to operate.
She’s standing outside of a KFC, of all places, close to Shoko’s side, and just barely hiding behind Satoru. She doesn’t exactly mean to be hiding, but again, she can’t bring herself to move. Her hands are curled into fists so tight that they’re shaking- or was that just me? She wondered, and hoped at least no one could notice.
Shoko did. She hadn’t taken her eyes off of (y/n’s) trembling hands since she’d arrived.
Neither of them had said a word, but even if they weren’t frozen in shock, there wouldn’t have been a chance to. Satoru hadn’t offered even a moment for someone to cut in with their own piece of mind.
“What’re you getting at!?” He snarled loudly, not caring about the non-curse users passing by, just trying to go about their days.
(y/n’s) eyes landed on a particular disgruntled couple, who hastened their steps upon seeing the public display. How she wished to be them, at this moment. What a luxury, to find this scene annoying, maybe mildly entertaining.
To think the world as she knew it was crashing down around her, burning up into a crisp. If only she could walk away and roll her eyes.
“If I could be you…” Suguru speaks and it sounds rehearsed, calculated, as if he’d had this conversation before. “Wouldn’t my impossible ideal become possible?”
“You can’t be serious” Satoru’s voice finally drops in volume, and (y/n’s) eyes dart from one friend to the other.
She stares at Satoru hard, trying to read him, trying to figure out what was going through his mind. It’s useless, because she already knows. She already knows exactly what he’s thinking, because she’s thinking the same thing.
Satoru’s hand curls into a fist, and when (y/n) notices it, she relaxes her own hands, which suddenly feel sore from how long she’s kept them tensed. Her palms feel raw as the cool breeze hits them.
For the first time since she’d arrived, she opens her mouth.
“Don’t do this, Suguru,”
All eyes are on her now as she steps forward. Her entire body is aching, maybe from the intense workout she’d done before warping here, maybe from the way the heartbreak is killing her soul.
But then again, what was one more heartbreak?
“Just- just come back, okay? Come back home and we can- we can talk this out”
Satoru and Shoko stare at her, surprised by the offer, wondering if she meant it, that she’d forgive him for his heinous crimes against non-sorcerers, against his own family.
What they don’t know is she’s speaking without thinking. The words that fall from her take a piece of her heart with them, making them sound like the most sincere thing she’s ever spoken, but truthfully, she just doesn’t want to accept that this is who Geto Suguru was now. She wanted to give him a chance to prove it all wrong. She wanted to give them all a chance to forget the last few months and go back to normal.
Suguru chuckles, shaking his head and plastering on a smile.
“Ever the hypocrite, (y/n),” He says, tucking his hands into his pockets.
Her posture stiffens, and her features harden too. Forgiveness was only Plan A. Her fingers twitch at her sides, and she fights the urge to curl them back into fists.
“Your exhaustion becomes you,” Suguru continues, with a smile on his face that doesn’t reach his eyes, which are pointed at her with a venom (y/n) can recognize even from the distance she’s at. “I see you’ve made your choice”
It’s a comment that doesn’t make sense to the others, but (y/n) knows fully well what Suguru was getting at. Her teeth grit together.
“Don’t you speak to me about choices!”
On it’s own angered accord, her arm shoots over her shoulder, fingers wrapping firmly around the hilt of one of her swords. Before she can unsheath it, Satoru’s hand is around her wrist, halting her.
Her head whips towards him so fast she hears a joint pop in her neck, but she’s not bothered by the unsettling crack, consumed enough by her rage to glare at him, silently demanding to know why he was stopping her. Satoru doesn’t say a word, but when he slowly releases his hold on her, she doesn’t try to draw her weapon again. The fire in her eyes doesn’t die as he holds her glare.
Suguru laughs to himself, shrugging his shoulders.
“I suppose this is goodbye, to all of you”
Satoru and (y/n) look back over to him, neither of them knowing what to say. Shoko is wilting behind them both, not having said a word since Satoru and (y/n) had shown up.
Suguru raises his hand, giving what appeared to be a friendly wave. It feels like a finishing blow. With that, he turns around, and walks away. He doesn’t run, he doesn’t summon one of the many curses he could have used to carry him away at high speed. He simply strolls away.
Satoru raises his arm, and (y/n) watches with baited breath as he positions his middle and forefinger to his palm, tucked there by his thumb, and keeps it aimed directly at Suguru.
It’s only for a few seconds, but with her breath caught in her throat, it felt like ages.
Did she want him to do it? Her heart pounded in her chest, getting quicker with every beat. Did she want to stop him, just as he had stopped her? Did she want to beg him not to kill him?
The question hits her, and her breath is finally released, a heavy, shaky exhale that makes her entire body deflate.
Did she want Suguru to die?
Satoru lowers his arm, although his eyes are still trained on the spot his best friend once stood. He was gone now, lost in the crowd of people. Leaving the three of them to stand together, staring at that spot, at a loss for words.
What was there to say? Their best friend had defected, he wasn’t the person they knew, he was a murderer.
(y/n’s) the first to move, although it’s staggered, she takes a step back, putting distance between herself and the others. Satoru and Shoko look at her with worry, and Shoko even reaches out a hand, as though to help stabilize her. (y/n) takes another step backwards.
“(y/n/n)...” The girl whispers, but (y/n) can’t even meet her eyes. Her own eyes are glazed over, locked in a fixed position on the ground.
I can’t dwell on this, she thinks to herself rationally. Her heart begs her to let go, to sit down, to breathe, but she ignores it. I need to move on. I need to focus on Megumi and Tsumiki. I can’t let this distract me.
“(y/n), slow down,” Shoko’s voice is closer to her now, and (y/n) barely registers how her hands set on her shoulders with a feather-light weight. “Breathe”
She doesn’t notice her breathing has gone ragged, uneven. She’s panicking. This is a panic attack.
Move on, she wills herself to get over the incident like it wasn’t her present situation. Think about the kids, and move on, she tries anyway, because she has to.
The funny thing about trauma was that you couldn’t bend it to your will. It hits her now that her chest is heaving, her mouth is dropped open as she gasps for air.
Shoko’s trying to get her to focus, something about matching her breathing, and looking at her, but (y/n’s) vision was blurry, and she couldn’t hear a thing over her pounding heart and her own thoughts.
You only have two days left to prepare, she reminds herself. In two days, the Zen��in Clan is going to come for Megumi, she repeats it like a mantra, a toxic coping mechanism to combat the panic threatening her body.
She had no time for things like panic and fear.
If you don’t get it together, you’ll lose them. And if you lose them, what will you have left? You’ve pushed everything away to protect them, you put your life on pause, and you’re about to risk what’s left of it by challenging one of the most prominent families in Jujutsu Society.
Finally, her head snaps up, wide eyes meeting Shoko’s, who flinches upon the contact, and then she turns to Satoru, who was now also standing before her. (y/n) doesn’t say anything as she looks between them both, and neither do they, at first, but their concern is evident.
“Are you alright?” Satoru asks, leaning in closer as he speaks. She holds his eye contact, but it doesn’t look to him like she’s processing a word he’s saying. “(y/n),” He says her name, catching a flicker of recognition in her eyes. “Can you breathe?”
You don’t have time for panic, the voice in her head reminds her ruthlessly. You don’t have time for any of this.
She looks back to Shoko, whose tears are spilling onto her cheeks, after too long of holding back her emotions. Her lip quivers, and her hands tighten on (y/n’s) shoulders, gripping the fabric of her uniform shirt.
You need to leave, the voice commands, and she doesn’t give it a second thought.
She draws her hand upwards, not noticing the violent tremble of her entire arm, she brings her middle and pointer finger to her forehead, closing the rest of her hand. Satoru recognizes this motion instantly, and jumps forward to rip her hand away from her head.
Using Hexing Eye so recklessly couldn’t be good for her right now. She hadn’t perfected it, hadn’t learned to use it as a means for teleportation, and without a hex in place, she was bound to lose consciousness as soon as she warped.
(y/n’s) faster, throwing herself backwards just as she closes her eyes and focuses her mind on her dorm room.
“Don’t-!” She barely hears Satoru’s voice before she’s warped away. It’s distant, almost an echo, almost dream-like.
Her body lands hard on the floor of her room before she even has the time to open her eyes again. With a groan of pain, she tries stretching her already aching limbs.
I guess that’s why you don’t teleport while mid-fall, she thinks bitterly, pushing herself off the floor on a shaky arm. Her legs aren’t any better, wobbling like jello as she half-drags herself onto her bed.
She’s going to be bombarded by Satoru and Shoko later, for this defiant act, she knows. And even as her strength is giving out and her vision is blurring in focus, she thinks it was what she had to do.
She tries to plan on what she’s going to do tomorrow when she sees the Fushiguro kids, but she loses consciousness just as their faces flicker in her mind.
Using Hexing Eye without a hex on the place she was warping to still wasn’t a viable form of transportation.
A tear slips down her cheek as she passes out, still in her uniform, mind still swarming with half-baked strategy plans, and fear.
Despite finally getting a few hours of sleep after two days, it wasn’t a night of rest. ___
When (y/n) picks up the Fushiguro kids from school the following afternoon, they can see her weariness right away. Even though she smiles, and excitedly asks about how their last couple days had been, they can see through it all.
The bags under her eyes are dark and heavy, and she’s moving slower, almost stumbling over her own feet. Tsumiki and Megumi share a look of concern, neither of them knowing how to approach the subject. As involved as (y/n) was in their lives, she hadn’t been very open about her own life outside of them.
Tsumiki takes her hand as they walk home together. She knew she wouldn’t be strong enough to catch her if she fell, but she hoped that it was enough to bring her some sense of comfort.
Megumi tangles his fingers together, picking at his skin nervously. He’s reminded of the day in the park, when he’d seen her talking to a supposed friend from her school. He remembers how she’d looked when she’d told him that a fellow peer of hers had passed away.
She has that same look in her eye now, he notices.
(y/n) feels him staring at her, and when she looks down at him, she gives him a smile.
It looks genuine enough, but he knows it isn’t. It doesn’t reach her eyes.
Once they get back to the Fushiguro house, (y/n) is quick to whip them up an afternoon snack while they get started on their homework. Tsumiki and Megumi get right to work, quietly focused on their assignments.
(y/n) sets down the plate of snacks between them, quietly praising them for working so hard.
As she takes a seat next to Tsumiki, Megumi notices the way her body seems to slump into the chair, as though melting into it. He quickly lowers his gaze back to his homework, but the sight troubles him.
She looked like she was going to drop and pass out any moment.
He tries not to worry about it, because she might not be a real grown up, but she was older than he was, and she was always put together like a real grown up. Megumi knew that he looked up to her like a grown up, and grown ups didn’t look like this.
He didn’t know what he was looking at, really.
Both kids finish up their homework quickly, and are quick to gather on the sofa to watch tv and relax for the evening.
(y/n’s) slower, still sat at the kitchen table while they dove into their program. She was still mulling over her options, trying to figure out if it was wrong to hide the letter from them, or if it would be more wrong to tell them about such an adult matter.
Which wasn’t fair, she cursed herself, hanging her head in her hands. She wasn’t an adult either, she shouldn’t have to deal with all of these decisions either.
Despite her better judgment, she decides to put it off for just a little longer.
She gets up from her seat, and slowly makes her way over to the living room sofa, plopping herself in the space between both kids.
“So, what are we watching? Catch me up” She tells them with a smile, and Tsumiki happily fills her in on the drama in her favorite characters’ lives.
(y/n) tries to sink back into that familiar, domestic feeling she’d grown accustomed to when she’d first joined their lives. That sense of normalcy that she’d tethered herself to. But even as she engages with Tsumiki, asks her silly questions about the show, she can’t help but fear this may very well be the last normal night she spends with them. Tomorrow was Friday, so she wouldn’t see them, and the next day… well, the next day she’d have to face the Zen’in Clan.
Before her mind can derail further, (y/n) feels eyes burning in the back of her head, and she turns to see Megumi staring up at her, completely turned away from the tv.
His expression is neutral, but his eyes are hard as he holds his stare on her. She almost feels uncomfortable, but she covers it with a small chuckle and a quirked brow.
“Somethin’ wrong, Megumi?” She asks.
His eyes shift to his sister, who gives a small shake of her head, warning him not to say anything about (y/n’s) troubling demeanor. Megumi sighs, and sinks back into the couch, focused on the tv again.
“No” he mumbles back to her.
He’s not a good liar, but he’s eight, so (y/n) lets it go. He seems to relax as he watches the show, anyway, so she figured whatever it was, couldn’t be too big of a deal.
The rest of the night continues in the same way. Until eventually she’s bringing them both upstairs to put them to bed, just like she always does on nights she spends with them. Except tonight, Tsumiki hugs her for a little longer than usual, and Megumi lingers in front of his bed, unwilling to get it.
“Megumi,” (y/n) calls softly from his doorway. “Are you alright?”
He turns around to face her, revealing the book in his hands. Charlotte’s Web.
He hesitates before speaking.
“I’m not tired…” He says, but his voice sounds slow and sleepy. “Will you read to me for a bit?”
(y/n) smiles, nodding her head back at him.
“Yeah,” She agrees, not thinking twice about the time, or how she should be getting back to Jujutsu Tech soon. “Yeah, of course”
“Can we go back to the couch?” He asks.
(y/n) wants to ask why she can’t read to him while he’s tucked into bed like she usually did, but she quickly assumes he’s just being a kid that wants to fight sleep, so she nods her head.
“Sure” She agrees with a smile, and steps out of the doorway so he could lead the way down the stairs.
Megumi climbs onto the couch with his book in one hand, his other hand reaching for the ratty old throw blanket on the cushion beside him. (y/n) takes a seat beside him, taking the book and flipping to the page that he’d last marked.
“How many times have you read this now, anyways?” She asks.
Megumi ducks his head shyly, shrugging his shoulders.
“I dunno,” He admits. “It’s my favorite”
She smiles as she looks back at the page before her.
“It’s becoming my favorite too” She says, before she starts at the top, and begins reciting the story she’s told him many times before.
She gets through about a chapter and a half, with Megumi curled up in his blanket beside her, his eyes following along as she reads. He’d had most of the story memorized by now, it really was his favorite, but he couldn’t get enough of it.
“Hey, (y/n)?”
His voice is quiet when he cuts her off mid sentence, but (y/n) stops speaking instantly, turning to give him her attention.
“What is it?” She hums, her finger holding her place in the book.
“Tsumiki said it was rude to ask,” He began, his eyes focused on his lap. “Are you okay?”
(y/n’s) brow furrows in concern, but Megumi doesn’t look up, too busy playing with his fingers.
“It’s not rude…” She says slowly, trying to find the right thing to say. “And I’m okay”
It’s not very convincing.
Megumi looks up at her, blinking his wide eyes as he stares at her in disbelief.
“You don’t look okay,” He says, and it’s blunt, but it’s the truth, and he doesn’t know how else to make her be truthful with him, too. “You look tired. And sick”
(y/n) chuckles at how intuitive he is.
“I appreciate the concern, honey,” She says, trying to play it off. “But don’t worry about it, I’m just fine”
“Did you have another mission?” He asks.
(y/n) winces, shaking her head.
“No, not exactly,” She says honestly. “I’ve just been… busy… that’s all”
Megumi frowns, not caring for the bullshit answer. It wasn’t like her to lie like most adults did, when they thought they were being smart and misdirecting. (y/n) almost laughs at how such a young boy can tell when she’s beating around the bush.
“Megumi, you don’t need to worry about me-”
“But you worry about us all the time,” He mumbles defeatedly. “And you don’t look very good so… so we’re worried about you,”
He blinks, and (y/n) swears she even sees tears in his eyes. Fretting over him, she closes the book, and brings one leg onto the couch so she could face him properly.
“Can you just tell me the truth?” He asks quietly.
(y/n) sighs, but nods her head. When he asks her so sincerely, she can’t bear to lie to him again.
“Of course,” She says, because if he’s telling her it’s what he needs, then it must be the right thing to do. “Megumi…” She starts, but the words fail her as soon as she tries.
How does she explain her situation to an eight year old?
“I… I had a friend. A close friend,” She begins.
Megumi’s eyes widened.
“A boyfriend?”
“No,” (y/n) scoffs, pushing his shoulder gently. “I’m too busy raising kids, I don’t have time for a boyfriend. But this was my best friend. And he… well he recently left the school”
“The one from the park?” Megumi tilts his head.
(y/n) frowns, before turning her face away to quickly hide the sadness of the whole situation she’d been trying to bury. It appeared she had quite a friends that weren’t around anymore, for whatever their reason. Megumi also frowns at this.
“No… no this is a different friend,” (y/n) says quietly. “Do you remember when I told you about the sorcerers who… who don’t want to follow the rules?”
“That they defect?” Megumi asks.
If it didn’t break her heart, (y/n) would praise him for his sharp memory.
“That’s right,” She murmurs. “Well… that’s what’s happened to my friend,” She tells him. “He didn’t want to follow the rules anymore, so… he left”
“Oh…” Megumi looks back down at his lap. “Did he die?” He asks quietly.
“No, no he didn’t die,” (y/n) said.
She lays her palm between his shoulder blades, rubbing his back comfortingly. Even as she censors some of the truth from him, she feels like her words are still putting a weight on his shoulders.
“I’ve been sad because he left,” She tells him. “I probably won’t ever see him again”
I hope I don’t see him again, she thinks.
“That’s worse,” Megumi says sadly. “I’d rather know that they’re gone forever for a reason”
(y/n) feels her heart leap into her throat, and she can’t help but wonder if he’s thinking about his dad. She’s surprised a child so young could understand how she feels. It hurts her more, knowing he’s experienced this same heartache.
“I think I’d have to agree,” (y/n) hums, raising her hand to mess up his hair. Megumi looks up at her with a frown. “It’s not easy being a Jujutsu Sorcerer,” She tells him. “I never said it was easy, never thought it’d be easy…”
Megumi pulls her hand out of his hair before she could mess it up further, before he fixes the messy locks himself.
(y/n) looks at him, and swallows the lump in her throat that makes her want to cry. If only he were older and she could explain all of this to him.
“But listen, Megumi,” She leans forward, and hopes he can take her seriously, even for just a minute. “You don’t have to worry about me, okay? I’ll be just fine,” She gives him a smile. “I’m sorry I made you worry, but you don’t have to worry that little head of yours about me anymore, alright?”
Megumi isn’t sure if he should believe her, but she ruffles his hair again with a laugh just to mess with him, and when he swats her hand away she only laughs more, so he thinks she’s okay, for now.
“You know you don’t have to raise us, right?” He asks.
(y/n’s) eyes widen at him, stunned to silence.
“It’s okay, if… if you have to go. You have a lot to do, don’t you?” Megumi drops his head again. “We would understand. We would be okay”
Her heart breaks, and before thinking, she reaches out and wraps her arms around him, hugging him tightly.
“Megumi, I’ve told you before,” She has to focus on keeping her voice even. “I’m sticking around whether you want me to or not”
His hands cling to the back of her shirt.
“There’s nothing that would make me leave you guys. I knew what I was getting into when I met you both. I knew what I was getting into when I started looking for you. And I’m still not going anywhere”
She rubs his back and keeps hugging him until he pulls away. Her focus remains on him, and she frowns when she sees tears on his face. Her fingers gently reach out to brush them away.
“I know you won’t just leave” Megumi sniffles.
(y/n) takes his little hands, smiling at him fondly.
“I won’t ever leave,” She whispers. “I’ve put a lot of trouble into watching out for you two. You’re important to me. And I’m going to make sure you guys can have everything you want”
Megumi musters up a small smile.
“Okay,” He mumbles, pulling his hands away to wipe the rest of the wetness off of his face. “Can you read a little more?”
(y/n) smiles warmly, and nods her head.
“Of course,” She says, picking the book up again, flipping through the pages to find the spot she lost.
Megumi gathers himself up in the blanket once more, and when she finally finds their place and begins reading again, he leans against her arm. He might have an eight year old’s willpower to stay up late, but the tiredness had finally caught up to him.
It didn’t take long before he fell asleep against her. (y/n) stayed still for a while, marking her place in the book and setting it aside while she sat quietly with the sleeping boy.
She petted his head gently, untangling the knots in his hair with careful fingers, and making his body relax more as he drifted deeper into his slumber. Even long after he’d fallen asleep there, she remained by his side.
I hope you believe me, Megumi, she thinks as she lays her own head against the back of the couch cushion, suddenly finding the old thing the most comfortable place she’s ever rested. And I hope you forgive me.
She drifts off to sleep with her hand on his head, and hopeful thoughts that she can do right by him. ___
With a jolt, (y/n’s) body is thrown forward in bed, tears streaming down her face and her hand outstretched, reaching for an imaginary figure, one that had been suffering before her in her dreams, but now was nowhere to be seen.
Panting to catch her breath, she tries to tell herself it was just that, a dream. Well, a nightmare. It was over now.
“(y/n)?” A tired, raspy voice rang out, before a warm hand smoothed over her shoulder. “You alright, sweetheart?”
“Satoru,” She breathes out his name as she turns to face him, a relief spreading through her chest upon seeing him there. “You’re here”
Her breathing steadies as she looks at him, his sleepy eyes and disheveled hair a sign that he’d actually been sleeping comfortably. She was surprised, considering he’d spent most of his nights in her room to dote on her, to ensure she was the one that slept well. Since Yu’s death, she’d been plagued with nightmares, the reminder that even jujutsu sorcerers face their mortality had been brutal.
“Well ‘course I am,” Satoru mumbles, giving her a small smile. “Where else would I be?”
She’s not sure why, but when she’d first laid eyes on him, his presence had shocked her before it had relaxed her. Her brows furrow as she wonders why that is, but she quickly brushes it off and lets herself relax.
The nightmare was over. She was here now, and so was he.
With languid movements, Satoru props himself up on his elbows, his eyes flickering over her curiously.
“You wanna talk about it?” He asks, pulling his hand from her shoulder to rub the tiredness out of his eyes. “Your nightmare?”
(y/n) pulls her knees to her chest, keeping her arms wrapped around them so she could comfortably rest her chin there. The longer she was awake, the more the horrors of her dream seemed to fade away, until it was just a few flashes of images that barely made sense.
“I think I’ll be alright,” She replies, laying her cheek against her folded arms so she could look over at him. “Satoru,” She hums his name softly. “Thank you, for staying with me,”
He gave her a look, displaying his confusion with her sudden sentiment.
“I don’t think I ever thanked you,” She says. “And I should have, a long time ago. So, thank you. For everything”
Satoru sits up, mimicking her position as he rests his arms on his legs, staring at her with an intensity behind his cerulean eyes that only she seemed to be able to take on directly.
“You want to thank me…” He says slowly, before his brows furrow. “When all of this… has been your doing?”
The chill that shoots down her spine seems to spread over her heart. The relaxation that had settled into her bones now replaced with freezing cold fear. (y/n) lifts her head up, unblinking as she stared at him.
“What?” She mumbles, her voice barely audible.
“You couldn’t track down Toji, and I almost died” Satoru spits out.
“No…” (y/n) shook her head in a small but trembling motion. “No, I… I followed him for days I- I did everything I could to-”
“Tch,” Satoru scoffs, the disgust evident in his face now as he glares at her. “And then you don’t even have the guts to fess up,” He mutters. “You sneak around and lie and cheat. What makes you think it will be any different?”
As he snarls at her he shoots forward, and she flinches, hard enough she had to steady herself so she didn’t tumble out of her bed.
“You think that you can protect them? You?”
She’s still shaking her head, unable to find her voice, or any words to defend herself. Where was this coming from? Why was he doing this?
“You can barely operate your own cursed technique, you have the ability of a first year, and you’re spineless, (y/n). It’s pathetic that you consider yourself a jujutsu sorcerer”
“‘I- I’m doing everything I-” She tries to speak, but it’s useless. Her breath had gone ragged and the panic inside of her was bubbling up too much for her to focus on speaking.
Satoru leans closer, and even though they’re both sitting, he towers over her as his glare hardens. She’s never seen him so filled with hate, and the fact that it’s directed at her makes her heart drop to her stomach.
“Your ‘everything’ isn’t good enough,” His voice is a low growl.
Tears burn in her eyes.
“How can you be the only one that doesn’t see that?” He laughs bitterly. “How are you the only one left that can’t see how weak you are?”
“I- I’m sorry-”
“Even your apologies mean nothing!” He yells now, and she squeezes her eyes shut so she doesn’t have to look at him any more. “You’re destined to fail, you’re weak, just like the rest of them. You can barely protect yourself, you think you can protect Megumi? Tsumiki?”
“I have to try!” She wails, but it’s drowned out by his vicious laughter.
“And when you fail, their blood will be on your hands!” He’s practically roaring over her.
She’s cowering, sobbing into her hands as she desperately attempts to wipe the tears from her face, but it’s no use. They won’t stop. Satoru scoffs at the sight, disgusted by what she’d been reduced to.
“Face it,” He mutters. “You could have stopped Toji, and you failed. You could have stopped Suguru, and you failed. Now you think you can take on the Zen’in Clan?” He scoffs and shakes his head. “You’ll die in vain” ___
“Stop it!”
(y/n) shot outwards, her strained voice leaving her throat in a pained cry, but as the blur in her vision clears away, and she gains her bearings, she realizes she’d just awoken.
A dream? She thought distantly, looking around herself, finding she was still in the Fushiguro’s living room.
That’s right… I fell asleep here… reading…
But she finds that Megumi is no longer sleeping at her side, and the blanket he’d had was now thrown over her lap. He must have woken up and gone back to his room. The realization that he’d given her the blanket to keep her warm brings her a moment of peace. Picking up the ratty material that was barely enough to keep her legs covered, (y/n) begins to calm down.
Her breathing calms, and she closes her eyes to focus on bringing herself back to the present. It was all just a cruel dream.
However it’s not as easy when she’s alone, she realizes. There was a time, although short, where when the nightmares would rob her of her sleep, there was always a comforting presence right there, ready to lull her back to sleep with a warm embrace.
And sometimes he’d read to me, she recalls.
Although the plaguing images of her nightmare had worn away from her mind now, she still feels a wetness pool in her eyes.
She missed him. Dearly so.
A tear drops to her cheek against her will, and soon she was quietly weeping into her hands.
Deciding to lay back on the couch, she gives in to staying the rest of the night at the Fushiguro house. She’d never stayed the entire night, but she was long past curfew now, and she was in no position to walk or warp back to Jujutsu Tech. She carefully pulls the small blanket over herself as she settles into the cushions. Her tears wet the place where she lays her head.
If she survived this, she’d have to thank him, for all the nights he stayed by her side, she recalls the short period of warmth that her dream had brought her. She hopes she can drift back into it’s sweetness. And then she’ll have to get on her knees and apologize for the rest of her life.
She knows she won’t earn Satoru’s forgiveness.
If I survive. ___
(a/n): wow that kfc breakup do be hurtin but it hurts so goood. reblog to dry ur tears <3 taglist: @whats-humanity-lol @malinq-ashida @mor-pheus@bekahtaylorgriggs@pookiea@megumimind@thealchemical@pearlstiare@niallerhere@96jnie @purpleguk @peqch-pie@yukinemaroop@makis-girl@sadtoru @kamikokii @nerdiel-has-no-braincells @googlesheetshoe @vzleria
xoxo ~ jordie
#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#satoru gojo#satoru gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader friends to lovers#friends to lovers#gojo satoru x reader series#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru imagine#gojo satoru fanfiction#gojo satoru scenario#satoru gojo imagne
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↻. GENSHIN IMPACT
↻. EYES ON ME .
in which [name] can't really handle eye contact very well, can they handle scara's gaze on them? ( they can't . /j )
pairing : scaramouche x reader
warning/s : lowercase intended, not good very cringey!
word count : 714
note : not really my best work but i'm doing this for the sake of keeping this blog alive and active, i have sm pending works istg i've been trying to finish them all at once 😭
you have a habit of staring everywhere except to whoever is talking to you. every time someone speaks with you, you're looking in the other direction and aside from that you will only look at them if necessary. several of your friends also noticed that if you're talking to others, your gaze seems to avert and look elsewhere.
they asked you about it and it appears that you're unable to hold eye contact for too long since you weren't used to making eye contact with other people and got used to working alone or with only a few people you had known like family.
by the time you have finished your work, you find yourself having a drink and a chit-chat with scara. it was only supposed to be a small chat with how your work and his work is but seems like scara has other plans. he made you his drinking buddy.
you weren't really a fan of drinking yet you accepted the offer since you don't wanna be rude and now, you're here drinking with none other than scara as you avoid looking at him as possible. everything around you now looks interesting to you. it now appears that each thing has a deep meaning that it should have. with your eyes glancing almost everywhere you still managed to catch everything he says word by word.
he notices that your eyes have been glancing everywhere but he never saw you glance at him even for a second. tilting his head to the side, his arms crossed near his chest.
“ are you listening? ” that didn't sound like a question to you yet it is a question. you're just interpreting it differently. “ huh? yes, of course. i'm listening. ” answering his question only looking at him for a few seconds and then smiled before looking away again.
the indigo haired man smiled. it wasn't visible but you can see it if you look closely. he stopped discussing things with you besides everything that was coming out from his mouth was complaining.
in exchange for the silence, his eyes linger on you, you can feel his eyes on you as if he was burning holes into your sitting figure in front of him. your [e/c] slowly side eye scara's own orbs. he was definitely just looking at you and by the looks of it he doesn't have any plans on looking away soon even if you aren't staring at him.
“ you genuinely can't keep an eye contact, huh? ” he questioned as if it wasn't obvious enough by how you tried to avoid his gaze. he knows that you aren't that used to looking at someone in the eye and also knowing that it's disrespectful to not look at the person who's talking to you.
you didn't even notice there was a lump forming at your throat if you haven't gulped. everything looks so interesting right now, you just want to run away from here and look for something that looks interesting and pretend to study it. “ i should really practice on holding eye contact.. ” you thought, you can even do it by looking at the person in front of you but that doesn't seems like a good idea.
the person in front of you is scaramouche. everything about him feels intimidating for you. building up the courage you finally give in and looked up at him. he was taken back when you looked back at him, his eyes widened for a second before he smiled smugly at you.
that lasted you well, not that long but you're proud of yourself for that. you hear him chuckle as he uncrosses his arms as he puts his hand on the table.
“ very well then, can't really keep your pretty eyes on me for so long? ” he teased with a saddened tone when he said the words so long as your cheeks heat up.
you didn't even answer it as you just left him alone there, not wanting to embarrass yourself any further as scara just watched you walked away.
he noticed the tip of your ears were red when you stand up and he couldn't help but smile by just how adorable you are.
maybe teasing you more often, will make him see your other side?
date posted 052024
#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact imagines#genshin impact scenarios#genshin impact#scaramouche x reader#scara x reader#scara fluff#genshin fluff#genshin fanfic#genshin drabbles#genshin impact drabbles#genshin imagines#genshin scenarios#im putting all the tags idk why .#𖦹.aeruwrites
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Hello,
I just read your posts about JK future spouse and I have never seen such in-depth details using astrology 🤯. Vedic astrology is truly marvelous.
I have been meaning to ask you, if you can discuss what could be her career (will they both be singers) or her wealth status or could she be famous etc.
If yes then how? And do you give personal readings?
Thank you 😊
So in his D9 chart Venus is in the 2nd house in Magha, this can indicate that she or her family works in a sector related to food and drinks. It could be a restaurant or a cafe or they run a business related to food and beverage products. Since it's in Magha, it could be very well that it's a family business in which she's also involved in, because Magha can show a person being a business owner/CEO, someone who is put on a throne and expected to take charge, that's why it can indicate a family business. And Magha also shows that their business/restaurant/cafe could be quiet well known in their surrounding. Or if they have some sort of a brand it could be something of high quality or prestige, the brand name could be something in the theme of historical, cultural or prestigious/royal. But Mercury is also conjunct Venus in Magha, so it could very possibly be a family business in the marketing sector, because Mercury deals with marketing and sales businessess and in the 2nd house it can be food and beverage related.
Then in his D1 chart he has both his spouse indicator planets in the 9th house of higher learning/studying. One of them is his Darakaraka Moon is in Magha. This could mean she might have studied anything related to history, cultural sciences like anthropology, anything history research related like archeology (I know this sounds crazy right, like what???), or even anything related to children, because Magha and Purva Phalguni in the 9th can give something related to children and education, it can make someone a tracher. Now his other spouse indicator planet is his 7th lor Mercury in Purva Phalguni, this could indicate that she might have studies something related to languages or philosophy, because Mercury rules over languages and the intellect, but here again since it's Purva Phalguni is still has that relation to children and the 9th house theme of education, so this could very well make her a teacher of some sort.
Either this woman is just personally very interested and well educated in these fields or she has seriously studied some of these fields in her academics.
That's not all, we also have his Venus in Chitra in the 10th house of career. But Venus is on the Virgo side, so this indicates that she's working behind the scenes, and has a job which requires her very precised skills and talent, very detail oriented, it could be anything related to designing, fixing things, making things look aestethically beautiful, something where she can collaborate with people or work in a team. Could she be famous? If she presents her craft publically then yes, she could gain lots of attention and popularity but it depends on her, because Venus in Virgo Chitra really indicates someone who works behind the scenes and is doing all the magical craft, If it was on the Libra side it would definitely show someone who likes to present themselves outwardly.
So with all these aspects... no, she most likely is not going to be a singer/musician/actor (nothing in the performative field). She will be very intelligent and highly educated in various fields related to history, cultures, languages, (child-)education but professionally she will be in a field where she can perform her skills and talents in beautifying things behind the scenes. And additionally she might be involved in a family business in the marketing sector related to food & beverage, in which she might also make use of her diverse language skills from D1 Mercury 9th house going into the D9 2nd house.
Have a nice day.🌺
#sidereal astrology#vedic astrology#future spouse#navamsa#darakaraka#jungkook#jeon jungkook#bts jungkook
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Good Omens: on fate and reality
In season 1 of Good Omens, The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch play a vital role in helping to avert the Apocalypse. Anathema dedicated her life to understanding Agnes's prophecies and thereby helping to fulfill them. But in the final episode of season 1, when the package with the follow-up collection of prophecies arrives, she decides to burn them, because she does no longer want to live her life according to the writings of her ancestor.
This is interpreted by many as Anathema taking her fate in her own hands instead of subjugating herself to something that was foretold. But the fact that she burns the prophecies instead of studying them does not necessarily mean that she changed her fate. It is entirely possible that her life will still take the road that Agnes foresaw for her. Agnes probably even predicted the burning of the new prophecies.
The only difference is that now, Anathema knows that all the decisions she makes are of her own free will, while otherwise she would have always wondered what she did because she wanted it and what she did only because Agnes had prophesied it.
A further indication that people acting according to their free will does not contradict the idea of fate is God's Ineffable Plan itself. At the end of season 1, when the Apocalypse has just been averted, Crowley asks Aziraphale: "What if the Allmighty planned it like this all along? From the very beginning?" Aziraphale agrees that this might very well be possible.
So even though all the people involved made their own free choices, they could still have been acting according to a plan God laid out very long ago.
Conclusion No. 1: Free will and fate are not mutually exclusive.
However, it seems that some things can be altered. Adam as the Antichrist has the power to bend reality. He uses it to change the fact that Satan is his father and to bring back people from the dead, for example Lesley. When Aziraphale expresses doubt about Mr. Young really being Adam's father, Crowley says: "It is. It is now. And it always was. He did it."
So Adam did not only change reality for the present and the future, but also for the past. He was able to make things that had already happened undone.
Conclusion No. 2: In the Good Omens universe, reality can be altered, even retroactively.
And the ability to change reality does not seem to be limited to Adam. Another example, as Goldfarb Styrt (cf. p. 127; cited below) points out, is Crowley being able to get himself and his Bentley through the burning M25, while Hastur gets discorporated. Crowley simply imagines that everything is fine, and by imagining it, it becomes real. Goldfarb Styrt (cf. p. 123, pp. 126-127; cited below) also suggests that it might be the individual's interpretation of reality that matters.
That sounds really fitting to me. Because the Bentley is burning, no matter how Crowley imagines otherwise, and it explodes as soon as Crowley isn't concentrating on keeping it together anymore. And, as @indigovigilance mentions in this post, the people who witnessed the incidents during the attempted Armageddon, like Atlantis rising from the sea, still remember them, even after Adam undid everything again.
But Crowley and the humans interpret the aforementioned events in a different way than you would expect, and their interpretations have an impact.
In any case, reality and the ways in which it can be altered are important themes in season 1 of Good Omens. And season 2 contains hints that they might play a big role in the finale as well. The most prominent example of these hints is the recurring mention of the Book of Life.
I will go into more detail about the Book of Life in my next post, but the important bit for now is that by erasing someone's name from it, you create a version of reality in which "they will never have existed". So the Book of Life is another tool to effectively alter reality.
Conclusion No. 3: Reality and the possibilities to alter it are important themes in Good Omens and will be relevant to plot of the finale.
That's it for now. What are your thoughts on fate and reality in Good Omens?
Work cited: Goldfarb Styrt, Philip: Sola Fide. Ineffability, Good Omens, and the Reformation. In: Giannini, Erin and Taylor, Amanda (Eds.): Deciphering Good Omens. Nice and Accurate Essays on the Novel and Television Series, pp. 120-132.
@kimberleyjean
#good omens#good omens meta#the nice and accurate prophecies of agnes nutter#good omens 3#good omens movie
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