#which has made me notice all these details and the way they cohere into a really thoughtful commentary on this character

[glitchtricks94]

Senseless

Inguro Obanai and Giyuu Tomioka Sometimes, your love gets carried away and makes you lose all coherent thought. However, after a hard day, it's the least they can do, taking out all your thoughts and replacing them with all their love. This request was made by my dear friend, @desi-the-blue-eyed-kakushi, I hope you enjoy your men! Obanai my beloved Anyways, kick back, relax, mind the banner rule, and enjoy~ -Glitchtricks

Giyuu always knew if something was wrong with you. His quiet nature made him more observant, especially regarding his beloved lotus blossom. Your shoulders were sagging when you drudged through the door, a detail barely perceived before you forced yourself to perk up as you spotted your love approaching you. He noticed the saddened sparkle in your eye, the same he carried for a long time. Forcing a smile, you greeted him, a sharp pain shooting through his heart seeing you try to force yourself to put on a façade to try and hide your pain from him. He didn't want that. He wanted you to trust him to see everything, know everything. It upset him seeing you try and pull yourself away like this. "My love." Giyuu spoke, his voice as soft as a babbling brook. "I can see the sadness in your eyes. Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" You let your mask fall, looking at the ground as you shook your head. He enveloped you in a warm embrace, you melted against him, the scent of irises and freshly washed linen enveloping your senses. Giyuu always loved to soothe you like this. Giyuu was more than willing to help you forget your pain, too. You ended up confiding that you honestly just wanted to forget the world and all that happened to you that day, your beloved nodding in understanding as he took your hand and led you to the bedroom. That felt like hours ago. You were currently laying on your back with Giyuu's cock buried snuggly inside your cunt, moans being dragged out from your parted lips. Giyuu was putting his everything into his movements, your hands pinned to either side of your head by his own, fingers intertwined. He loved this feeling of intimacy, being able to stare down at your face, your body. Seeing the two of you connected in such ways made him feel like he was flying, and it always did wonders for making you focus on him and him alone.

"G-Giyuu! O-oh, fuck, Giyuu- Ah!" You cried out, squealing as the water hashira continued to plunge his cock into you, his tip pressing against your sweet spot relentlessly. "M-my lily, y-you- Shit- You feel so good...S-squeezing ne so tight, s-sucking me back in-Ah! Oh, gods I can't get enough of you..." Giyuu panted, leaning down and pressing his lips to yours, a muffled groan leaving him as you came, the man above you still pressing forward, intending on fucking you until you could only feel the pleasure he gave you, feel the love he held so deeply for you. He needed you to know. Giyuu only wanted you to know of him and his cock for the night, nothing else should be in your pretty head. Not while he has you wrapped around him so deliciously. He flipped you over onto your stomach, pulling your hips up so you presented to him with your ass in the air, the hashira thrusting back into you, somehow reaching deeper than before, whines and cries of delight flooding from your lips. You felt your mind go blank, pleasure being all you could feel, all you could register.

Obanai considered his keen eyes and ability to read others one of his crown jewels of strengths. His protective nature tended to add an extra edge to his skill, and he often exercised it on either the newest weaklings to see if they even had potential, which to him, most do not, and on you, his beloved. You were the serpent of his heart, the thrum of a heartbeat in his very soul. You gifted him the ability to feel as if he was normal and not some monster born of tarnished flesh. He always felt so safe in your care, in your warmth, like a snake sunning itself on a stone. You were his sun, he was your moon. One can only imagine the fury he carried when he saw you arrive home with tear stains tainting your cheeks, eyes red and puffy from crying. "And just who did this to you now, my sun?" The serpent hashira asked, his voice low and dripping with pure malice. His heterochromatic eyes softened when you reached out to him, taking his wrist in your hand. Kaburamaru instantly slithered down from your lover's shoulder, moving to coil gently around your arm. It was his form of a hug. "N-no one, Obanai...I just...it's been a rough day, and I don't wanna talk about it...I'd rather just forget." You sighed softly, your lover humming for a moment, Kaburamaru taking the hint and returning to Obanai's shoulders as the raven haired man led you to your shared bedroom, making sure to place his beloved companion in his own terrarium like cage, the albino serpent swiftly getting comfortable and falling asleep. "So, just to clarify, you wanted to forget, correct?" Obanai spoke, his voice soft, and gaze softer as he looked at you. You nodded, the man before you reaching up to remove his bandages. "Are you willing to try something? I have a plan, but I need input on your end." "I trust you with my life, my moon. I'm willing to try anything you want." You replied, Obanai appearing pleased by this response. "Good. Wait for me on the futon. I recently acquired something I think you would enjoy." He ordered, you following without question as he got to his feet, disappearing from the room for a brief moment. When Obanai returned, his bandages were gone, his scars on display for you to see and a strip of silk cloth patterned with red spider lilies rested in his hands. "I thought we could try blindfolding you." He spoke softly, seemingly amused by how wide your eyes had gotten before he approached you, kneeling down before you. "Do you trust me?" You always did, you told him, your voice hushed yet filled with excitement as he carefully wrapped the silk strip over your face... Obanai's hands felt as if they were everywhere; your hips, your legs, your chest, your stomach, no inch of skin was left untouched by his delicate and calloused fingers. He relished in every soft whine and honey sweet moan you let out. It was all simply magical to him. "Yes, that's it, my sun, lose yourself in this pleasure." Obanai hummed, dragging his palm all the way down from the valley of your breasts to your pussy, which was simply dripping with your need. He knew what you wanted, and instead of making you beg, he'd give you mercy. "H-hah! Obanai!" You moaned out, feeling your lover circling his fingers over your clit, sending jolts of pleasure zipping up and down your spine. You squirmed beneath him, the serpent hashira grinning with sadistic delight at your struggles. "And how does this feel, dear serpent of my heart?" "L-like- Oh! Like- mmmnnn- L-like you're d-driving me crazy....Oh fuck, p-please don't stop, d-don't!" You whined, your lover soon sliding his middle and ring fingers down to your weeping entrance, pressing them in with ease. You felt your mind go blank from the sudden intrusion, instantly screaming as your orgasm snuck up on you when he curled his fingers inside you. "Oh, you've cum already." Obanai cooed, his eyes dancing across your flushed form. "I hope you aren't too tired, we're only just beginning."

[rin-and-jade]

Reflections Beyond One Could See: A Detailed Post on Subsystems

"Just like a mirror, capable of depicting a whole scene.. once shattered, it shows many other angles and views that also made the initial reflection less coherent and fragmented."

Before you proceed, this post is the continuation of the previous post , here we cover many other details and information that people had never talked about for these 4 types. If you had seen it, let's begin!

The purpose it has..

I will be talking about the type 1 and 3 first.

Subsystems can be said as a different variant, though a related form to splitting (where it popped a part off someone) which may or may not be related with the initial alter, usually more distinct/unrelated.

In general means, subsystem is emphasized as a form of splitting for the specific alter to cope from distress, or to keep functioning, that isn't involving the whole collective.

All about type 1 & 3..

A reminder that the frequency and severity of how many facets it can break off, or how easy it can create subsystems come from the alter's own stress tolerance; which means some can form them easier (like me), while some are still holding on and stable.

Type 1 - Polyfaceted Subsystem

This type happens to be inside an alter due to still having reasons of feeling intact or together, usually different sides of the same alter. This is made to understand that there might be conflict with some thoughts or views, or due to instability with no intention of rejecting its own sides of selves.. fragmenting to each facet one has, now more autonomous that makes it easier to organize/understand each facets.

(Selfmade name from Poly in Greek; and facette in French, means "many face")

The common obstacles found in this type:

Switches are not as noticeable, especially in lesser distinctions between each facets

Prone to be blurry, or struggle with communicating as the opinions are not synchronized

often causing confusion or disorientation in decision making, due to having many sides but one body trying to operate its own ways

Type 3 - Monodive Subsystem

This type happens when there has been a rejection of identity/trait, or no longer able to cope with the presence of the problem to the core, trouble moving on or trouble keeping other facets together,, so in order to adapt, it splits distinct alters that separates from the main in order to lessen the burden/symptoms. Now all independently autonomous, it may have a similar appearance or an incredibly different look along with it's personality.

(Selfmade name from Mono in Greek; and Divisus in latin, means "separated one")

The common problems found in this type:

Contrasting views and opinions, which creates difficulties finding the middle ground

Problems with gathering evidence due to compartmentalization of memories, or traits, as it is harder to identify or understand fully autonomous splits

May follow with memory loss or skill for the initial alter, if still existing, and foregoes a personality change which can be confusing/distressing

The other meaning..

Okay, now I'll talk about 2 and 4 here.

Subsystem can also be defined by a group of alters by any means, for the most frequent examples such as having the same set of roles, or origins.

Theyre different from polyfaceted and monodive as these two types of systems can extremely vary from one system to another, there is no 'general' rules or requirements and only by reason of grouping.

All about 2 & 4..

Type 2 - Tersynd Subsystem

This type is about a set of specific alters that can traverse out-of-reach innerworld regions with ease that most people couldn't access, or have a hard time reaching to the destination, even staying for a prolonged time, and especially if it needs that specific alter to bring others there. (Also knew from personal experience)

This can also be applied to communicational barriers as some can talk easier compared to others, as it might sound more distant or blurry or can't 'click' nor mediate.

(Selfmade name from Iter in latin; and Syndedemenos in greek, means "travel and connected")

How tersynd works:

It is based on the level of connectedness to a particular area of interest/origin, which is made to be a home or area for similar kinds of alters exclusively. Be it origin or roles

Other folks may not be able to enter or stay in an exclusive area due to a different purpose or off-synchronized with the intention of the area, as there is no personal significance to connect with

Barriers do not only exist in worlds, but also communication too. There might be ease of conversing with a similar group of alter than to the less connected ones as it might have different jobs/roles, thus lesser importance to interact (This can be practiced to build better communication, as the brain loves compartmentalizing and keeping alters separated for survival)

Type 4 - Neofamile Subsystem

This type is for those out there, who developed a connection, or a familiarity who all belonged from different origins,, for example, elves and vampires may not be directed by the same species but they have similarities that connects them together such as longevity and supernatural/fictional beings.

This one is rather self explanatory too.

(selfmade name from Extraneo in latin; and familia in latin, means "from outside but family")

Last words..

I hope that covers every part of what people rarely talk about in this topic, and has been informative from start to finish!

Also, what do you guys think of the names? Should we keep them or stick to "types" instead??

And thankyou for reading to the end, i tried my best to make it as compact as possible.. let me know your own subsystem experiences, or your thoughts on this topic,, i wish you all a good day <3

I can elaborate in a separate post on how to integrate subsystems for healing, just let me know

- j

[endermaybe]

I loved reading the "From Eden" story, written by @aquaquadrant and the accompanying art by @lunarcrown. I keep thinking about the story/world, so I decided to be kind to myself and write it out, so at least my thoughts will be organized.

Or so I thought. It turned out to be more of a ramble than a coherent piece of text. I'm not gonna do it to myself to check and clear up everything, it's supposed to be a fun write, not a chore. I've made a lot of (obvious) observations and asked a lot of questions, but that's me just 'thinking out loud'. And I knew it would be long, but I hadn't expected it to be this long. I'm not sure if anyone will be interested in reading all of it, but here it is anyway.

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I love it, and everything about it.

I love the whole "Hells to Pay" universe. I love how alive the universe feels while at the same time it still feels very much like Minecraft. I love how it has very much game logic while at the same time having very real stakes and dangers.

I love the characters, both the ones based on youtubers and the original ones. The first category are clearly recognizable with their way of speaking and mannerisms and the latter seem just as well developed. I love how everyone has depth. Everyone has strengths and weakness, even if it's not always obvious. No one is fully good and even the worst characters have some good qualities. And everyone has the ability to change and learn, for better or for worse, but only if they choose so.

I love the writing. The way it's structured makes it fun and easy to read. The wording very much supports the world and it's characters. I love how it lingers on some moments and quickly goes over others, it feels very natural. And though I am the kind of person that wants to know anything about a universe/story they love, I do think that the amounts of exposition and explanation are great. More would probably hinder the telling of the story itself. And I love all the extra bits of the world told through answering other peoples asks.

I love the art. Everyone is unique and easy recognizable. The bodylanguage and faces are really expressive. It's great to see. Beside that, it's also an artstyle that I just really enjoy.

So onto more details of the story. A LOT more details, I basically did another deep read to make sure I didn't miss anything. Spoilers I guess for anyone who hasn't read the story but somehow did find this post.

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Lunarcrown's into comic looks amazing. It also wonderfully shows what kind of world Hels can be and the nightmare that is Tango's life. When I found the story, this intro was enough to get me hooked.

I think it's funny that the first part of an eleven chapter story (of which two are two-parters) is called a one-shot in the authors notes. I mean, I'm not a native English speaker and all that, but I don't think that's correct. Was it intended to be a stand-alone story? Had it been the plan for the AU to be told through short stories?

It's a small thing but I like how every new chapter/place is introduced by "Somewhere in [insert world], a player [is introduced, doing something]", with very minimal variations. It's a nice returning bit, through the whole story.

The way Tango's imprisonment is described is chillingly beautiful. It's horrific, but at the same time almost casual. But that's what is has become for Tango: just another day. In the same way, the manner of escaping is grueling, showing clearly his desperation. Well done.

It's so clearly noticeable, even through the immediate relief of escaping Hells Tek, that he's been through so much and that it impacted him so much. And then he decides to hide it and pretend it didn't happen for another decade. Even if he didn't fool people nearly as much as he thinks he did, it's so sad he though he needed to do that. Not to say that I can't understand it. Sadly, it probably stopped him from openly enjoying what he had: his freedom, all the wonderful experiences of the overworld and his friends. It's an amazing first chapter.

Also I love the way you write Xisuma.

And hello Bravo. I don't really like him as a character, too arrogant and snobbish. But at the same time, I love his journey and it's fun to follow him. He didn't deserve to be stranded here. But then again, that was kinda the point of the Universe's little experiment. I wonder, if he would one day learn about that, would it make him feel better or worse?

It's interesting to see his outside view of Hermitcraft. And them being considered a private bunch in this universe, while we see them pretty much place every block of their megabases, through streams and timelapses. Then again, in-story Hermitcraft is only in it's second world/season. I haven't been following Hermitcraft for THAT long, but it probably isn't a fair comparison. I wonder which of the Hermits Bravo was familiar with. Some of the redstoners, probably.

Timmy leaving his save spot to talk to Bravo wasn't something I noticed om my first read, and it's sweet of him. I love Timmy, and at the same time I want to yell at him for taking such poor care of himself. It's nice to see that through all he experienced he hasn't lost his kindness.

I've been definitely overthinking this, but while rereading Timmy explaining what Hels is to Bravo I was wondering how he knew the difference between Hells and a normal world. The logical explanation would be that some other player told him. But I remembered a post were there was mentioned Timmy was a Listener and I am a sucker for any Watcher Lore (and your version is great), so my mind came to the conclusion that a Watcher told Timmy. After all, he seems so lonely and so attention starved, that he would probably love it when the Watchers are around him. Maybe he tries to talk to them, make them stay a little longer. Most Watchers wouldn't be interested in him, since they can't make him leave. They would only be at spawn if someone more interesting has died without a respawn point. But maybe... Maybe some of the nicer Watchers decide to humor him, and talk for a moment. Maybe after a few times, they discover it's nice to sometimes just have a conversation with a player and just... start telling him things. Random bits of trivia, events that they've Watched somewhere else, things about their old lives. They would still be mostly doing other Watcher stuff, but when they are bored, or were about to visit Hels' spawn anyway, they stop by a certain avian.

Like I said, I've been overthinking this. It probably doesn't fit your story, but it has been fun to imagine. I like the idea that Timmy is one of the few players that is completely comfortable with being a Listener. And I like the idea of someone that people don't spend a second thought on casually having conversations with literal deities.

Back to Bravo for a moment. The stretchend out death-loop that is his way out of spawn is interesting to see. He starts out relatively optimistic but get's a hard and painful lesson on what life in Hels is like. By the time he meets the Arena recruiters he seems to understand why Timmy doesn't leave spawn. Bravo is glad with the resources he has, even though in any other world a second-day player would probably put him to shame. His first instinct on seeing players approach him is now to hide. He's already changed a lot, probably without even realizing it. And that is before he snaps.

The symmetry between the ending of one chapter and the start of the other is well done. One duo dies and Bravo finally gets a break in his struggle to survive. Another duo dies and Tango has a big setback in the game he's participating in.

The tone of chapter 3 is very different from the previous chapters. For a big part, it is an adaptation of Jimmy's and Tango's first episodes of the Double Life series. It's impressive how that part is both true to the source and a good adaptation. And then it smoothly transforms in your own work. Well done.

"They have only one bed." Look, I am very new to fanfiction, but even I know that this is a classic. I don't mind. Classics are classics for a reason, and you've written it good. I love the awkwardness here between the two of them.

Somehow the thing that's hardest to believe is that Grian would be the one to propose an end to the death-game, and it's funny that other characters seem to find that hard to believe as well. But it's a fun set-up to change mid-way in a death game to a survival world.

The addition that the soulbound can make you aware of your partners feelings and that it amplifies whatever is already between them. And thank you Impulse, for sharing your wisdom and for talking some sense into Tango. All the things Tango worries Jimmy will hate about him, seem to be the things he hates himself for. No wonder he feels unlovable. And thank you Pearl, for giving Tango some perspective.

So much of this chapter is just lovely and wholesome. After the Ranches have one good conversation, things just organically develop. Their relations grows closer and stronger. Tango learns to love and how it feels to be loved, he learns to be vulnerable, he slowly starts lowering his walls. There are still mountains of old pain, but there are new pieces that are healing as well. Thank you Jimmy, for being the healer that Tango needs. If only it would last.

Back to Hels. It's a nice detail that beds are a high end item. I guess that means making wool from string isn't possible (4 string into wool never felt right anyway). Though an anchor would prevent a long death loop by running out.

The inner workings of Hels Tek are a nice bit of information, though the place itself definitely is not. How does it compare to other redstone labs, like iRaid? Many workers probably only tolerate the restricting of their freedom because it's still better inside than being alone on the outside.

Clear is a fun character, especially when interacting with Atlas. He can get away with almost anything because he is just to valuable to loose in Atlas' eyes. He is a tragic mess but highly intelligent and takes pride in his work.

It's very telling that young Atlas, with just two minutes of life experience, already assumed the worst of others. That is not something he learned. Why would someone bother to plug a hole at spawn? Ease of traveling? And it's wood, valuable and burnable, it could have been part of a make-shift bridge, or something. Atlas really is the worst. Oh, and rule number one of Minecraft: don't dig straight down, smart guy.

It felt strange to me that Timmy lied to Atlas about Bravo, while pointing them in the direction that Tango want, the guy Atlas is actually looking for. But now I realize that Tango could "still see spawn in the distance", just before the portal spawned. Did Timmy in turn actually see Tango leaving and Bravo joining, from his higher vantage point? That would mean he probably did protect Tango, by not telling the full truth. Also, he's seen both of them. Has he noticed their likeness?

I hadn't caught on to Timmy casually lying Bravo in the first few times I read this chapter. It's sweet. And that he is able to do so while sounding casual surprises me. It feels like a stark contrast with his counterpart, who seems to be a bad liar and with an very emotive voice. And Timmy managed to do so in the face of a powerful man who has already subtilty threatened him and his with minions around. A quiet display of (inner) strength.

Timmy has delayed Atlas and Bravo meeting for five years, half the time Bravo spend in Hels. Five years without answers, five years without any hope of returning. If Atlas had found him the next time Bravo respawned (shot by a skeleton, if matched up chapter II and V correctly) Atlas would have put things together. Bravo would probably have jumped at the chance to get to Hels Tek, to civilisation, and he hadn't learned the "healthy Hels skepticism" yet. Atlas would be his savior! And would have been able to fully shape Bravo's image of Hels. Now, Bravo had to build his own image. Would he think it would have been worth those five years? Maybe, after he finally escaped Hels. I hope so, for Timmy's sake.

Tango had five more years on the overworld because of Timmy's lie. Five years of healing, but also five years of hiding and festering. He would have been in the fifth or sixth world of Hermitcraft, which would have had more resources than Double life. But the Hermit are more thinly spread and not focused on pvp. And on Hermitcraft, Tango probably would have been alone, when Hels Tek came for him. Others would have probably too far away to reach him in time, if they even knew were to go. Or maybe Tango would have been lucky and Hels Tek would have entered minutes before the final battle of the season 6 Prank War. Probably not but that would have been funny. There is a chance that the five extra years were unnecessary and only stopt him from fully healing but I think its way more likely that it saved him. On Double Life and with Jimmy at his side it seems that everything was exactly right for Tango being saved and to make sure his past won't come back to hound him anymore.

I truly hope that Timmy's little lie made things better in the end. I didn't realize that I had so much to say about one sentence in the story. I hope you didn't mind the sidetrack.

Atlas looking for Tango in the Arena seems to be the reason that the recruiters that made Bravo snap ran into him in the first place. Credits were it's due, thank you Atlas, for giving Bravo the means to gain things like good food, end-game armor and weapons. I still don't like you.

Considering Alisker has a spy in Hels Tek, and doesn't actually want hybrid farming to succeed, could the failing of respawn anchor be due to sabotage? Or maybe it was just the will of the Universe. Also, Alisker humiliating Atlas is very satisfying.

The downward spiral of Hels Tek is also very satisfying. It seems that Atlas never bothered to make any protocol for things taking a turn for the worst. I guess that just would be unimaginable for him. And then dr. Clear manages to halt that spiral in one lucid peptalk. That makes me sad that his lucid moments seem to be so rare and frustrated that he uses his skills and talents for Hels Tek. Clear Cut's mental health issues could be some form of heavy depression. That would be treatable. Earlier in the chapter it was mention he has to use potions of swiftness to be functional, but that sounds like management to me, not treatment.

The difference between Atlas meeting Bravo, and Atlas meeting a young Tango is interesting. Tango's base is hidden, while Bravo's is not. Bravo asks questions before deciding whether to attack, while Tango does not. Both of them are wary, but Tango seems eager to work in a redstone lab, while Bravo only sees it as a way home. All of these differences seem to be learned, though. And young Tango is cute.

Bravo at the start of chapter VI has plenty of Hels experience, but without Atlas having manipulated his worldview yet. Still, it's not a pretty picture. He thinks Atlas is probably dangerous because "he’s from Hels, after all". As if overworlders can't be dangerous. Does he know how players on anarchy servers can be? Does he know how an UHC works?

Overworld players gain the ability to travel between world as teenagers, and Bravo mentions next chapter that he probably stopped aging while still looking young. Tango was recruited as a teen, and spent only a few years in Hels Tek. He is the same age as Bravo. In other words, Bravo probably didn't have that much of a window between gaining access to multiverse travel and getting trapped in Hels. Maybe Bravo is just naive when it comes to overworld players.

You know, I really thought Atlas was the one to bring out the worst in Bravo, but perhaps all he did was stop Bravo from examining his own biases. I know Hels is a though place but I can't believe Bravo is that special for having a grand total of three pieces of furniture. He also already considers hybrid players part monster. One of his first thoughts on hearing Hels is an actual prisonworld is that the players that have spawned here must deserve it. And when Atlas guesses that Tango managed "to utilize [Bravo's] connection to leave Hels", Bravo interprets that as Tango willingly trapping him.

Bravo's early days in Hels Tek probably mirror those of Tango. A rundown of practices and procedures of the place, other scientist gathering information about him, leaving the communicator with other scientist to let them figure out the data. Probably to work with the same iron farm scientist Bravo talked to. But Bravo is aware what it's actually for, Tango was fed lies. And Tango was a teenager that had probably grown up feral and just entered a community for the first time.

Hels!Keralis is another fun character. I love that one of the extreme traits that he got from his counterpart is more eyes. How does he know that Bravo isn't from Hels? With the number of eyes he has it somehow wouldn't surprise me if he has some sort of special sight. Or it could be corporate spionage.

I haven't mentioned it before but the way you write the passage of time, with short snippits to show significant moments or changes, is very good. It really gets across how not everything happens in short order, how events can have far reaching effects and how change can happen slowly. It also helps you feel that time has passed and the world isn't static.

Once Bravo had his first impression of Patho, he really didn't bother updating his opinion unless other players made him. Bravo wonders what it could take to loose an eye, and there is something that can do that. In some of the worldbuilding posts it's mentioned that Martyn lost one eye, and Grian both of them, to Watchers. It would make sense that an experienced player would be recruited, but it could also just be an coincident. Bravo disapproves of the fangirling towards Patho, but I wouldn't be surprised if he once was a big fan of Etho. Legendary overworld redstoner and all that. (IRL during April Fools 2013, Etho was famous enough to get his own Minecraft block) The manner Patho let's Bravo know that he doesn't like to be touched is way over the top. Patho is another interesting character, but one of those that I'm very glad of that he's fictional. At the same time it's sweet of Patho that he is very much willing to educate others and share his knowledge.

I like the touch that the first two times the portal is lit, it has everchanging colours. Like the Hermitcraft portal Tango went trough. And it's later explained that inter-world portals have unique color-paterns, depending on their destination. So Tango is still on Hermitcraft in the early attempts. After that it switches to the red-yellow-green of the Traffic SMP/Life Series.

Bravo almost shows some critical thinking and empathy when he finds the Tango Tek farm, but it's immediately ruined when Atlas shows up. I hope Bravo gets nightmares about this when he finally learns how to self-reflect. Bravo's sarcastic reply on whether he has said his goodbyes is telling. He could have made friends if he had wanted to, I'm sure. The scientist had been welcoming and curious about him, and as a redstoner himself it's not as if they had nothing in common. That's a good base to build upon.

His first moments in ten years in the overworld are beautiful. Though Bravo has very many flaws, I do have sympathy for him gotten trapped in Hels. But not for anything else at the moment.

Jimmy reflecting on getting to know the Hermits is fun and wholesome. The little things he has learned about Tango, the thing he seems to love most about him, seem to be mainly related to being a blaze hybrid. All the things that are just Tango. That makes Bravo's claim that he should have been Jimmy's soulmate just plain wrong.

The whole conversation between Jimmy, Tango and Bravo is amazing. Jimmy is trying to figure out what is going on and all is knows for certain is that the person he loves is scared and hurting. And once again Bravo almost seem to realize the universe isn't as black and white as he though it was.

And then the fight! Tango's terror and fight response. Jimmy's terror. Tango's shutdown when he realized that he hurt Jimmy. Just wow. And Jimmy's reaction to seeing Tango freezing up is pretty much forgetting he is on fire because Tango needs him! Poor, poor Tango. Bravo clearly sees himself as a good guy by taking back his rightful place and trying to help Jimmy, not realizing that for Jimmy he is the villain and the leader of the group that invaded the Ranch and is kidnapping his boyfriend. And Jimmy placing himself between the invaders and the portal, knowing he can't win is a beautiful show of his care, courage and determination. These guys have very shallow definitions of strength and weakness.

The Cavalry arrives! And the announcing their presence with the horns is very much Double Life. I know that battles are hard to write, but you did an amazing job with it. It's definitely chaotic with much going on, but it's clear to read and good to follow. Every Lifer does their part in the battle and everyone has their own fighting style.

Was Bravo so angry of Atlas that he tried to follow him back to Hels? The place that he tried to leave for ten years? The moment the portal breaks he is surrounded by overworlders. He can blame the battle going wrong and the mistrust of the players on Atlas, but they give Bravo a chance to explain himself and he messed that up all on his own. And Bravo has seen they are pretty much what he thinks overworlders should be. It's a server where they don't grief bases, where they work/fight together, where they defend each other, where they ask questions and don't immediately attack. (Outside the battle, but that doesn't count, they saw their servermates in trouble.) But they don't welcome Bravo as one of their own. They restrain him and mistrust him. They don't see him as different from the other players that came trough the portal. ("What did you guys do to him", emphasis mine) They hear his explanation but don't believe him. They dislike it so much they kill him, meaning this time he is send to Hels and it's not a fluke or mistake. It's overworld players wanting him gone.

I don't think he realizes this, not at first at least, he has his mind on other things. But once he has time to process what happened? It has got to hurt, even if he doesn't admit to himself he was wrong. I think it all does help later with Tango's words finally reaching him.

Jimmy's fear of not knowing were Tango is when the portal is broken is so real. So is the relief on knowing he's still (physically) with them. Scar being the one to shoot Bravo feels right. Scar has a goofy and easygoing demeanor, but he is very capably and not someone who you should cross, and Bravo did that by saying nasty things about his friend.

It's a relief that Bravo has finally up enough to stop working with Atlas. Progress? His fight against the hired muscle parallels the fight Tango had in brutality, as much as he might deny it. and slicing his own neck is brutal as well.

I'm still not sure how to feel about the Bravo/Timmy reunion. I'm happy that Timmy isn't alone anymore, that he is with someone who has been, not quite nice, but at least polite towards him. At the same time Bravo isn't doing this for the right reasons, he later admits as much himself. He is using Timmy as a substitute for Jimmy. Thing is, he doesn't know Jimmy. Is he really so hung op over the whole 'should-be-soulmates' thing over a stranger? I don't get it, and that could very wel just be a me problem. But he does want Timmy around, even if he's not Bravo's first choice. Since Bravo stepped through the portal that was supposingly taking him to Hermitcraft, Timmy might have been the only one that has been there for him. Timmy was the one who explained Hells to him, without trying to manipulate him. He has been welcoming to him. He has been the one who showed sympathy when Bravo died. The only thing Timmy wanted was not to be alone, but he didn't force that. I hope Bravo's biases don't blind him towards all that.

And that final sentence. If he can’t have the sun, he’ll learn to love its shadow. I know I haven't been the only one going crazy over that. That one sentence it saying so much. I've also have been (over)thinking what that makes Timmy, symbolism wise. The sun doesn't actually have a shadow, being a light source. But there is one thing, it isn't a real shadow, but there is something that is a lack of sunlight. If Jimmy is the sun, Timmy is the night sky. Both are beautiful on their own.

Back to Double life and their aftermath of the battle. I like that you fully wrote the aftermath. Things like this often get skipped or summarized. Now things have calmed down a little, the players have room to feel their exhaustion, their fear, their pain, to become more aware of their wider surroundings and to start figuring out what actually happend. It seems that no matter the universe, the Ranch is destined to burn down. It's sad to see, especially with how warm and cosy you had written the place. And ofcourse Etho and Joel have water buckets, with that clutching trick they love doing.

The state Tango is in, is heartbreaking. No one seems to be sure how to handle that situation, except Impulse, but that might just be appearances. Impulse and Jimmy have a very similar comforting warmth around them, I'm not sure how to call it. So, while Jimmy might feel useless (and the 'intrusive thoughts' aren't helping), I don't think he would have done a bad job with helping Tango. But Impulse has known Tango for years, and has some experience. And he didn't just went through the things that Tango or Jimmy just did. Jimmy's comment about the lights show that he does know Tango, no matter what he thinks. It's interesting that the comments from the Watchers right after are ambiguous in whether they are directed at Jimmy or Impulse.

You cannot sleep, there are monsters nearby. That sentence fills me with dread ever time I read it. It's a dread probably every survival minecrafter knows. And for that sentence to be directed towards Tango is devastating. Luckily Jimmy knows just wat to say to pull Tango out of it. The whole conversation after feels beautifully sad and vulnerable and raw. And it's once again devastating that Tango still feels that he has to be strong in front of Jimmy and only let's himself cry when he thinks there's no one to see it. But Jimmy is not doing nothing, he is being Tango's shoulder to cry on, an that is worth a lot.

The game-chat log of the battle is a fun read. It's very bare-bones, due to it's nature but it gives a good overview and a good indication of how the other Lifers reacted. You have a very good grasp of how you can use the chat in the story. Also, good job Bravo, you did the impossible and make Jimmy hate someone.

Tango's desperate attempt to avoid talking about what happend is painful, and it doesn't exactly work when other players were actually there to witness it. He's still afraid of being rejected because of the truth. And when de finally talks about his past he uses the word 'evil' to describe the players of Hells multiple times, he really believes it. Of course, his friends know better. I like how mad the Lifers are about Tango's past, how offended they are for his sake. And Tango's fear of they kicking him out never crossed their minds.

Whether or not it makes sense for this AU to have a concept of years, I'm glad they exists because it makes it much easier as a reader to keep track of time and of a player maturity. Gradual growth isn't really a thing in Minecraft, so it could even work as kind of sub-growth-stages between player children, teens and adults.

Another vulnerable conversation between Tango and Jimmy, with Tango admitting things he probably never said out loud before. But how bad is it really if he found a healthy way indulge in his questionable desires? And it's not like death is permanent. I can't argue with Tango saying he's messed up, but that's the trauma, not an inherent part of him.

I don't think he has deceived and lied as much as he thinks he has. His friends seemed to realize that Tango had a traumatic past and that some things set him of. They knew Tango didn't want to talk about it so they didn't ask. And he may have hidden his past and a part of his personality, but that was mostly lying by omission. Were the parts of his personality he did show false? Did he not want people to have fun with his games? I highly doubt that.

And it's not as if he's the only one with questionable personality traits on this server. In chapter IV Pearl gave him a bucket of powdered snow so she wouldn't succumb to the temptation of torturing her own soulmate, for example. Nobody is perfect, don't try to live up to an impossible standard.

The good thing about Tango saying all his insecurities aloud is that others can point out he's wrong, and Jimmy let's him know very clearly. Tango seems to be so surprised about it. He never considered his fears being wrong.

All things considered the Ranchers seem to handle the burned out ranch well. They're sad about it and Tango feels guilty, and that makes sense, but no anger or panic or deeply repressed feelings. Progress? Jimmy's comment about liking to wear the gloves is cute. Him not giving them back to Tango is also saying that Tango doesn't need to hide his claws, or himself. I thinks Tango is starting to understand that, even if he has trouble believing it. Same with all the players showing up, Tango sees that the truth about him hasn't scared them off.

I guess that there have been times that all the hiding was too overwhelming at times. Those probably moments Tango looked for Hels. If he was there wouldn't have to keep lying to his friends. He would have felt so much guilt, especially after learning that he had a counterpart that was probably trapped there. So it's a good thing it doesn't show up.

The similarities and differences between Patho and Etho explaining the portals stuff are fun. They have different experience with portals and different tools to work with, but they figured it out. And Patho isn't willing to give up one redstone ore block, while Etho is willing to get up and look for one with a friend.

Every time Tango mentions something about his past in Hels, Impulse seems to be in conflict to be a comforting presence or to be in righteous furry. It's hard to blame him. It's nice to see Impulse and Jimmy kind of team up to try to help Tango work trough everything.

I'm not sure how firewalls and whitelists work (or don't work) in combination with hacked portals. I'm also not sure how those exactly work. Then again, I know it's more important that they work than how they work. My brain just wants to understand it.

Tango, I get that you want to protect your friends but going into Hels alone isn't the solution. That way they at least get hurt by your actions and you actually encourage them to make unprepared, desperate attempts to get you back. If Tango had succeeded in breaking the portal, the Double Lifers would still try to follow. Since they know Bravo met Etho's counterpart, they would probably open a portal with his data. That would definitely have been interesting, but that would not have been good.

Thankfully, Jimmy is there to prevent all that. It's good to see that he stands his ground when Tango wants to cut others out, even though Jimmy has his own insecurities to deal with. And he already followed him to Hels, so of course Jimmy wouldn't think twice about following Tango into a trap.

Bravo has so many villainous vibes. It's a miracle he hasn't noticed it yet. He has figured out why they are here, but at the same time doesn't seem to realize they are here to help. And the hypocrite is calling Tango a monster for his temper, while he started the fight because of his anger. Bravo is a very good fighter, we've already seen, he's been in much tougher fights against much more experienced fighters. So it's not that surprising that the Ranchers lose.

Even after they lose Bravo keeps on hurting Tango with actions and words. It's no wonder that Tango realizes that the personality trait he hates so much about himself -a thing that makes him believe that he deserves all the bad stuff- is something he inherited from Bravo. It's something he only has because it comes from his 'better' counterpart. And that realisation gives him wat he needs to get through to Bravo.

Bravo's breakdown is beautiful to watch. You can see his whole beliefsystem falling apart and him having nothing to keep up his mental strength. It's so well written. For all the wrongs he's done, I never saw him as an evil person. Arrogant, biased and misguided, yes. Even so, he came to Hels with a strong sense of justice but he had to spend so much energy on just surviving that somewhere along the way he had to give it up. One can only have a survival mentality for so long before things have to give.

Tango understanding what Bravo must have been trough heartwarming. And I'm very much with him on this. Him embracing and accepting Bravo and Bravo finally accepting him is great. And now it's time for Bravo to begin his redemption arc. I absolutely love redemption arcs and -though I don't think Bravo's finished at the end of the story- this is a good one.

Timmy and Jimmy meeting each other is pretty much the opposite of Bravo and Tango meeting. No mistrust or hostility at all but mostly awe. It's nice how Tango describes it in his point of view. Timmy admitting he understand why he isn't good enough is just so sad. He knew Bravo couldn't fully accept him as he was, and he sees that his doppelgänger looks much better than him (rather objectively, being healthy beats being unkept and skin-over-bones). Jimmy basically goes all 'protective big brother' over Timmy, it's great. It's a relief that Bravo learned to (or at least started to) see Timmy as his own person.

The last scene of chapter X. It was so frustrating to wait to see wat happened next. Bravo seemed to be on Tango's side, so it would probably be a ruse. At the same time, it wouldn't have been the first time if Bravo had lost his temper and stopped being smart. I'm rather new in the fandom side of Minecraft Youtubers, so this was the first chapter I came across and the first time I had to wait for an update. I found it after someone reblogged some of Lunarcorwn's art (along with a tiny excerpt) about this chapter. I was immediately fascinated, and after the intro comic, I was sold.

The start of the next chapter doesn't give immediate resolution to a first time reader. Bravo is definitely convincing. He has to be, Atlas is not easily fooled. But knowing what's going on there seem to be small tells in how Bravo acts. Or maybe I'm just imagining things. Bravo's aggression looks like anger but is probably his newfound guilt and insecurity. He only talks to answer Atlas' questions, his speech seems more to the point while at the same time he uses more filler words.

It's interesting to see Bravo trying to trust Tango and Jimmy, while at the same time having learned to be distrustful of everything. He's really going back and forth between the two. Thankfully, Tango is understanding and shows him grace. Why does Bravo tense up when Tango mentions his friends won't attack on sight? Had he forgotten that overworld players don't tend to do that? It would probably be painful for him to realize there are things he has unlearned or forgotten.

Poor Timmy probably hasn't interacted with more that one person in ages. The Double Lifers must be very much overwhelming, especially since many of them aren't exactly low-energy players.

It's Tango's job to make sure his friends don't go with a bad -but easier- plan? Talk about role reversal.

The conversation between Bravo and Timmy by the portal is nice. I like whatever kind of relation they have, messy as it is. I'm not saying it's good, but it's interesting to read about. They each have many issues. Bravo is now aware of that, but I'm not sure if Timmy is. I'm not even sure Timmy knows what a healthy relationship looks like. They both care about each other and I think they could help each other out. But at the same time, Bravo has anger issues and biases against Hels players and hybrids and Timmy is both and probably wouldn't set any boundaries. At this moment them being together could either be healing or toxic. So I get Bravo's hesitance.

Jimmy's hostility towards Bravo is so odd to see. It's so unlike him, though it's fully earned. Tango and Bravo sharing their braincells while coming up with a plan is fun, especially since Tango has to tell his friends that every time that, yes, he is on board with what Bravo says.

I admire Tango's courtage to enact the plan. Then again it's in a way a variant on Tango's earlier plan to sacrifice himself, now it's only temporary. It's no wonder he looses his nerves and fully panics at the last moment when he is actually faced with the machine that caused most of his suffering. Once again: poor guy.

Bdubs has a point about Bravo calling others bad, but Patho literally disemboweled him so I think Bravo is being fair in his case. As for instinctSV, he barely appears in the story, so that's hard to say. But I don't think you get to lead a company in Hels by being trusting and charitable.

Grian and his Watcher abilities! This is a great moment to use his powers, especially since he so hesitant to use them. And he and Jimmy are right, this is not the moment to explain it all. This is the second time that Grian uses his silent 'Watcher voice' in a group meeting and this time there is an extra Listener around. Grian's secret is all but out.

Grian getting Mumbo to come with him with some crazy but true explanation somehow sounds like a very Grian thing to do. I love your portrayal of Mumbo. It's been a lot so it's no surprise that he needs a moment to wrap his head around it. Mumbo is a good friend, keeping how he helped/helps with Grian's eyes a secret. And Grian turned up on his redstone world? Wouldn't that be single-player? How did Grian manage that? And it's good to know that Grian told Mumbo what happend over time.

Something that stood out was that Mumbo stopped himself from tugging his mustache. The way it was worded was like a habit he tries to unlearn. It was also something Clear did but didn't seem to mind.

Tango finally understands he doesn't have to do this on his own and that he can rely on his friends. The warmth he has for the people around him here is so sweet. And he finally doesn't just want to confront his past, but actually wants to put it behind him. He still thinks that the "entire mess is solely his fault" (as if he asked for it) but he knows they will do whatever it takes to help him. "Is it really any wonder he learned how to be a good person just by knowing them?" Just beautiful! Though, is he seriously gonna give Jimmy a lecture about self-blame? That's just funny.

It's promising that Bravo corrects himself about the burned Ranch. Especially since nothing about it is even spoken out loud. He might have had a change of view, fully ingrained change requires more than that. But Bravo is willing to work on it. He does note himself that he wouldn't have been able to see Tango's influence on the interior.

It's entertaining to see how Bravo describes the Lifers, and Mumbo. The sentiment of wanting to kill Atlas is very understandable. Though Bravo is the Plan Guy, Jimmy is the leader here. He listens to Bravo because Bravo has the most expertise. But Jimmy is the one who the rest listens to, the one who keeps the conversation on track and the one who validates the plan.

Tango and Bravo realizing how much they both have changed due to were they have been living feels like something they needed. I like how they are now that they're not hostile towards each other. Bravo and Timmy's realisation neither of them is a builder is a fun parallel of Tango and Jimmy, and I'm glad Tango is there to watch it. It feels promising somehow.

Once again, Jimmy is being a leader here. Checking in, helping, dispelling fears. I highly doubt that Jimmy sees himself as a leader, though. The talk between Jimmy and Bravo is amazing. It just radiates growth and caring.

Tango in the farm. Oof. It's amazing how he is so close to drowning in despair, but still manages to find something to hold on to. And then he realizes he was strong enough to survive it all before, and that he is stronger now. It's wonderful how he let his good memories strengthen him, and that while he is currently living through his worst nightmare.

Clear not realizing Hels Tek is being invaded and said invaders being fine with Clear just continuing to do his own thing is really amusing. Clear 'recognizing' Grian is so sad. But Grian doesn't seem to have the instinctive recognition of his counterparts name, and later when said counterpart realizes Grians name, it's not his player name. That's interesting. I appreciate that Grian stays with Clear and I wonder what is said between them off screen. I hope Clear eventually realizes Grian is not Scáil.

The invasion of Hels Tak is a fun read. Overpowering the first guard went so smooth! Then the ravager just had to shake things up. It's nice that during everything, Pearl and Scott seem to have patched things up and are flawlessly working together now. Jimmy seems to notice a 'intrusive thought' cutting another off, noticing how odd that is, even if he doesn't understand wat it means. Bravo and Jimmy fighting in sync is awesome! What's also a difference between this fight and the previous is that Jimmy uses his wings while fighting. Something that wouldn't be fair in a friendly fight. Tango notices later that he fights way better when he does use his non-human-side, for Jimmy it might be the same.

It's so nice that Jimmy notices that Tango lost the fear he always carried with him. He handled the last hours in the farm well. The first time I read this part I was so worried that there wasn't any mention of breaking the respawn anchor. I couldn't imagine that they would forget while standing right in front of it. Luckily there was no need for a respawn. I had also been a little nervous about Timmy and Bravo, had they made sure they would respawn at Double Life if their spawn point got reset? (Is that even possible for Timmy with his Hells-comm?)

Sweet Jimmy does not tolerate his boyfriend being name-called. And sweet Tango won't stand for his boyfriend being hurt. They're cute like that. It's good to see that Tango being called a monster has lost its power to hurt him, no matter how hard Atlas tries. He's finally able to fully accept his mob-side. It feels good that the three of them manage to piss of Atlas so much that he finally cracks, giving Tango the closure he needs. And then what's probably the most satisfying punch in Hels' history, even inflecting permanent damage.

This is the first time Tango consciously reached out for his own fire, isn't it? His own firestorm is a beautiful thing. And powerful. I'm so happy for Tango! Atlas having to helplessly watch how Tango casually strolls to the portal is extra satisfying.

Atlas just sitting outside and letting his laboratory burn really shows how defeated he is. If he was any other person I would probably feel sorry for him. And why is he so surprised that Tango and Bravo are the ones that beat him? They're both smart people that know how he works and with plenty of reasons to hate him. Are they really that unlikely to bring him down? Or did he underestimate them because they don't have the authority to boss others around? Good thing Tango had his friends on his side and that Bravo understood the power of friendship.

And then bX has the pleasure of kicking Atlas while he's down. Must have been a great relief too, to let the hybrid-farmer know his life's work was done for.

Even for the Hermits that had known something was 'off' about Tango, finally hearing what happened must have been a shock, for the ones that didn't know yet. And for Tango it must be nice to be able to tell it on his own terms, this time. He probably knew by now that the Hermits wouldn't abandon him after telling the truth, but having conformation must still feel great. It's also great that talking about it is becoming easier.

Alisker and xB are very sweet together. Very different from how they interact with other people. I admire Alisker's long term plan and how successfully it played out. He really made sure Atlas' damage stayed limited. I just wish his plans hadn't required for Tango to be locked in the farm in the first place.

I think it's a wise choice for Bravo to take some time for himself. Processing and healing from everything that happened can be nasty, and at those times it's nice not needing to mindful of others. At the same time, part of me is worried he's gonna overcorrect himself or close himself off. I'm not sure how excluded different worlds are, and how much contact players can have through the multi-net, but I hope that Bravo stays in contact with at least Timmy. It's sweet that Bravo clearly cares about Timmy's progress as well and that he regrets they both have to take different roads to heal.

The progress Timmy has already made is wonderful to see. Not only physically, he questions Bravo's decision to go and voices his discontent. Gently, but still. It feels like he's learning how to stand up for himself. Timmy himself really wanting to grow as a person is very promising, especially as someone who represents his counterparts (*checks external authors posts*) passiveness and victimhood.

Dbubs first appearance in the main story! His and Patho's relationship is both so warm and unhealty. I love complex people and I love complex people being even more complex together, and this story is full of them! I also love it every time when players are having that instinctual recognition at the proof of existence of their counterpart on page, whether is just the name or meeting face to face.

I wonder why exactly Patho wants to leave. It's not he didn't know about them having counterparts. Why does it suddenly matter? Is it because they visited Hells? Because they visited Hells together? Because of the recognition Patho felt? Or is it something else?

False, seriously? I don't think having someone chained up like an animal is keeping you in Tango's good graces. And you basically told him it could wait until he got back, while you're holding your twin prisoner! There might be something wrong with Sym, but what's wrong with you? It sounds like an interesting story, and I definitely have questions.

Poor Scáil. His suffering might actually surpass that of Tango in the farm. And if he's been like this since he left Hels Tek, it's been more than a decade, considering they never met. How did he become like this? I know it's related to Grian almost becoming a (full) Watcher, but this can't be how this is supposed to go. And even Grian has control of his abilities. Scáil using Grian's Watcher name makes me wonder how how much player vs Watches they actually are. Grian, please check in on your counterpart.

Stress' way of talking is always fun. Her and Doc's origin is cool. And I'm curious what your interpretation of the Hivemind is. Doc not having a Hels is a big relief, considering Doc himself already loves creating game-breaking machines. That trait would be terrifying on someone with a Hels mentality, let alone an amplified version of that trait. I understand why they are conflicted about it, though.

I'm glad we finally see Instinct in person. I like him and the vibe he gives off. Atlas working for him is amazing, how far he has fallen! I hope Instinct enjoys bossing him around.

Tango making the video about Hels and how to get there surprised me when I first read it, even though it makes sense. A lot of Hels players will probably change for the better because of it. It might also wreck the Hels economy. Overworld players could give their counterparts a way out, or provide them with resources that are easy to get in a normal world.

I have so many questions about it all. Can mobs travel through portals? How would it work when someone creates a portal in a creative world? Could they just spawn in rare items (elytra's or even things like spawn eggs) and bring them to Hels? Can counterparts create hacked portals when both of them are at different places in Hels? If so, that would create fast-travel. That would be especially valuable in such a giant world.

It would probably kind of sting for Bravo to see the video. Everything he needed to know and took him a decade to figure out, quickly explained in one video, uploaded not long after he finally escaped. Not that I think he woud disagree with uploading it, it's just, where was that when he needed it?

The idea of Bravo seeing Tango's video is interesting. Bravo could see all the videos Tango made while he was trapped in Hels. All the inventions and games (first Decked Out) that Tango created, all the projects he worked on with other Hermits. Tango could see the ones that Bravo made before they switched places. He could see how Bravo acted before Hels crushed him, the friends he had back in the day and how young he was when he got trapped. I wonder if they do that, and how it influences how they see each other.

It's very nice how you worked Steve, Herobrine and Alex in this universe. Does the Hels firewall being down also mean that overworld comms now work there properly? Herobrine being Hels former admin makes sense, as the first counterpart, though I hadn't expected it. It's nice that there won't be new player condemned to spawning in Hels.

The scene with Jimmy and Tango is just lovely. The cuffs and everything they stood for were so loaded for Tango. I'm glad he's finally able to take them off, and that Jimmy understood how much it meant for his soulmate.

I love how the last paragraph is inspired by the end credits poem. And I love how it both does and does not breaks the forth wall, and the things it explains. It's a nice touch that it's in-story explained by Aqua and Lunar.

-----

And that was it. For the main story anyway. I've also read the short stories from the Hels To Pay universe, but I leave that for another time. Maybe. I liked writing this but I've had enough for now. If you actually read all of this, you have my uttermost respect.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

If you had to pinpoint the main issue of MLB, the root of all evil if you may (aside from Astruc), what would it be?

If we're going super high level, it would be narrative consistency (I believe this is a synonym for "narrative coherence" or, at least, I've always used them pretty interchangeably and googling one finds you stuff on the other). I wanted to get an official definition of this term and wikipedia gave me this from a larger article on the theory of narrative paradigm:

Narrative coherence is the degree to which a story makes sense. Coherent stories are internally consistent, with sufficient detail, strong characters, and free of significant surprises. The ability to assess coherence is learned and improves with experience. Individuals assess a story's adherence by comparing it with similar stories. The ultimate test of narrative sense is whether the characters act reliably. If figures show continuity throughout their thoughts, motives, and actions, acceptance increases. However, characters behaving uncharacteristically destroy acceptance.

I also found a pretty good overview of the topic on the blog of a random editor. You can follow that link to read the whole thing, but I wanted to highlight this section on characters as I thought it was particularly relevant to the stuff I talk about on this blog:

Your characters will have their own personalities and behaviours that the reader will become familiar with as the story develops, so if you deviate from these patterns, the reader will notice. That’s why it’s important to maintain character consistency – that they would act in a way that is right and in keeping with their personality, rather than making them act out of character to make elements of the story fit.

As you can hopefully see from the above sources, the stuff I've talk about on here, and just generally thinking about the show, most of the issues with Miraculous have to do with the show being narratively incoherent. Characters do whatever the writers want them to do. Plot lines get dropped and picked back up then dropped (Lila) with no rhyme or reason. Big, meaningful setups lead to nothing (Gabriel learning all the temp heroes identities). Twists come out of nowhere (Kagami being a senti). They all indicate that something is majorly wrong here.

I am not involved in the production of this show, so I cannot tell you where all of these issues come from. It may be that the writing staff doesn't know what they're doing or it could be that unknown forces like marketing are driving the writers to do things that they'd rather not or it could be a mix of the two. For example, I'm pretty sure the magical charms we get in season four were only added to sell stuff like this and this, which is why I try to approach this show without pointing fingers at anyone too specific unless there's some hard evidence to back up what I'm saying. All I know is that this show has a massive writing problem and I'll end with a little advice on how I avoid this issue. It may or may not work for you. It all depends on your writing style.

When you sit down to write a story, it's very normal to not have a clear path for how to get from story point A to story point B. You don't need to find that path before you start writing. You just need to keep in mind that B is your goal and start figuring out how to logically get there.

I often describe this process as taking a journey with a known destination, but no planned route. However, just like with a road trip, the further you go, the more limited your options become because of the choices you made. If you skipped stopping at an interesting city or landmark, you can't change that fact and we're not turning the car around just so you can get a picture next to the big ball of string. You had your chance and you missed it. Accept that and move on.

Similarly, as you write your story, you have to own the choices you've already made on your journey. If you choose to let a character in on a massive secret (Alya learning Ladybug's identity), then you have to fully own how that choice would impact all elements of the story (Alya's opinion of Lila) not just the short sighted elements you wanted it to impact (note how Lila's not a thing in season four? Almost like they didn't plan out how to handle her and Alya at the same time?) Own the route you committed to and find a way to tell the next part of the story in a way that feels like it's on the same route and you'll be fine.

Does that mean occasionally having to give up on cool ideas that you really liked? Yep, but that's the nature of story telling. It's part of the reason why people are told to "kill their darlings." That's just a thing you have to learn to do if you want to be a good writer.

[knickynoo]

Back to the Future Part II, The Novel by Craig Shaw Gardner: Thoughts, commentary, and general ramblings

Part 4: Someone buy Doc a gym membership

Previous posts here

• The McFlys are drinking KELP TEA with their pizza dinner. That is some Keaton family behavior. Elyse and Steven would 100% drink kelp tea.

• Ok, I’ve gotta talk about this scene where Doc is struggling to carry unconscious Jennifer to the car: “Doc stopped to catch his breath. Jennifer weighed down Doc’s arms until they were almost numb, and he had barely managed to drag her twenty feet!”

Doc. Are you for real right now, my friend? In part III, Marty slings you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and carries you from the car and into the mansion ALL BY HIMSELF in the rain. Up several steps, even! Five foot, four inch Marty. Carrying a six foot one, probably close to two hundred pound man.

And you, sir, just having had a natural overhaul that made you look and feel younger, and being as tall as you are, cannot carry a 5’3” teenage girl across the street??

Perhaps you should set aside some time to start lifting weights, Doc. Not super heavy ones, little ones. Just enough that you eventually reach the point where your tiny little buddy Marty no longer has to be The Muscle in your relationship.

• I must bring attention to the fact that Marty has said, “You’re the doc,” three times, and it bothers me that it’s different from the movie. Where’s that extra “Doc” that’s supposed to be tacked onto the end?? You’re the doc, Doc. Sounds silly without it.

• When Marty climbs in through what he believes to be his bedroom window in 1985A,  and the young girl starts screaming, Marty takes a quick moment to stare at the room in confusion. Among the changes in the room, one of the main things he notices is that his model airplanes are gone, which is a detail that I am currently holding tightly to my chest in a hug.

Marty builds model airplanes! I love that for him. Does he build them alone? With Doc maybe? Dave?? Are they from when he was younger, or is it a hobby our 17-year-old Marty engages in? You know, Marty has to deal with so much and be so mature about things, (and also MJF was in his late twenties by part II) that it’s easy to forget he’s a kid. But then he looks around his bedroom and goes, “Hey, where are my planes??!” and you remember that he’s just a little guy who has been tasked with dealing with a lot of Horrors.

I have to find a way to work the model airplanes into a fic now  thanks.

• The sad, drunk Dave scene that was cut from the movie (but is in the deleted scenes) is in the book. Marty spots Dave stumbling his way through the town, and it’s really a bummer of an interaction. Marty’s pretty horrified at the state his brother is in and tries to get some answers as to what’s happened, but Dave isn’t really coherent enough to help at all.

At one point, Dave tries to convince Marty to go have a few drinks with him, which horrifies Marty further. After pointing out that he’s underage and can’t drink (good boy, Marty), Dave says this

•When Marty tells Dave that he has to find their parents, Dave is disgusted. “Dad? You gotta find Dad? That’s sick, Marty. That’s really sick. What’s the matter with you, anyway?”

He also says, “And since when are you and Mom on speaking terms again?” which is a pretty wild revelation. ‘85A Marty and Lorraine aren’t talking to each other?? This does not fit in with my headcanons of alternate Marty at all. I shall disregard it immediately. :)

• Book Lorraine’s demeanor is noticeably different than Movie Lorraine. She’s speaking to Marty “cheerily”, and as she shows him the newly decorated penthouse, it’s said that she “waved happily at their surroundings.”

What a different introduction from the Lorraine in the movie, who is broken and defeated from the start. I wonder if she’ll continue to be like this as the scenes with her go on.

Still thinking about Marty building model airplanes.

[bittersweetresilience]

WAIT FUCK SHIT just realized that you actually commented on my fic oh my god. oh my god

i'm having a complete fangirl moment rn AAAAAÀAAAAAAAAA you're a literal legend i can't believe you read that word vomit but also i am over the moon.....senpai noticed me fr 😭

i adore the way you write. i don't even know how to describe it but it's in the emotions, how palpable and visceral they feel....just wow i'm absolutely in awe of the way your prose flows. it's so witty and beautiful and i can only hope to write like you one day

your writing genuinely has me choked up rn i feel crazy.....also as a fellow lore nerd it made me feel so seen that you noticed all those little renjing details :D god i love your jing yuan's inner voice he's so fucking old and tired and burdened by the weight of all his responsibilities yet the yearning hasn't waned one bit.....it comes across in all his interactions with other people....(the conversation w yukong killed me) he is never moving on, is he?

the letters to yingxing wrecked me each time. so painful but so artfully done. to be honest, i have always struggled a lot with writing jy and striking the correct balance between the wise, experienced general of the hunt that he is vs the sopping wet mess he becomes when it comes to Emotions and his friends and yingxing/blade. you captured that perfectly and i already know that i will be thinking about this fic for a long, long time

i am really sorry for this long ass ask 😔 i wanted to leave you a comment on ao3 but it is currently 7 in the morning and clearly i am barely coherent...i want to reread your fic and then try to gather all my thoughts for a proper comment but for now just know that you've saved my life with this fic

weirdly enough, i don't peruse the jrj tags much on ao3 which i now realize is quite stupid of me. this is the first time i've read one of your fics and i'm so glad that i stumbled upon it. for some reason i really missed blade and jy today and this fic truly made everything better (even tho i had tears in my eyes) uni is beating my ass rn but i'll def make time to read all of your fics now ty for your incredible service <3

SORRY FOR THE MINDLESS RAMBLE ;_;

AHKLBJADKFJALFDA DID I COMMENT ON YOUR FIC????????????? ANON WHO ARE YOU... WELL I KNOW YOUR TUMBLR USERNAME NOW BUT WHO ARE YOU ON AO3... could it be the incredible and lovely dustedpink who i met during renjing week...

I'M AJAKJDJKFKDHGHJD NO NO I'M BLUSHING SO HARD AND I AM SO HAPPY YOU'RE HAPPY BUT ALSO I'M NOT ANYONE SPECIAL I'M JUST A LITTLE GUY!!!!!!!!!!!! a little guy on the internet who really likes renjing 😳 and your fic, if i am thinking of the right fic, was absolutely wonderful and thoughtful and funny too 🥺 i don't normally read jingren things but i wanted to get to everyone participating in the week and now i'm even more glad that i did!!!!!!!!! i'm giving you flowers... 💐💐💐💐💐💐

i'm screaming about how sweet you are about my writing AAAAAAAAAAAAA... i'm SO SO glad you enjoyed it and YOU!!!!!!!! YOU ALREADY WRITE BEAUTIFULLY!!!!!!!!!!!! AND LORE YESSSSSS omg i love gnawing on tiny pieces of canon i will do that forever it's so fulfilling

JING YUAN IS SO TIRED 😭😭😭 HE REALLY IS 😭😭😭😭 his conversation with yukong is one of my favorites next to the one with fu xuan so I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT...

"the wise, experienced general of the hunt that he is vs the sopping wet mess he becomes when it comes to Emotions and his friends and yingxing/blade" JLAKJMFKLAKLFAKLDFJKDJFHJDFhdS no no you're so right about this 🤣🤣🤣 HE CONTAINS MULTITUDES. and we love to see it...

🥺🥺🥺 I'M SO HONORED TO RECEIVE SUCH A THOUGHTFUL ASK PLEASE DON'T EVER APOLOGIZE FOR THIS!!!!!!!!!! AND ALSO!!!!!!!!! OMG PLEASE GET SOME SLEEP!!!!!!!!!! i cannot judge you for i have also stayed up forever in the name of renjing but I AM TUCKING YOU INTO BED AND WRAPPING YOU IN WARM BLANKETS

i'm giving you a big big hug and i hope everything is a little softer and sweeter for you tomorrow and there's!!!!!!!!! never any rush to do anything!!!!!!!!! anxiety and ennui about writing have been beating MY ass the past few weeks but i'm 😭😭😭 WAAAAH I'M HOLDING YOUR KIND WORDS SO GENTLY...

thank YOU for being so kind and NO APOLOGIZING!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE!!!!!!!!! MY ANSWER IS EVEN LONGER AND MORE MINDLESS!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAJKFSJKFKSDF GIVING YOU ANOTHER HUG BECAUSE I'M SNEAKY 🫂💓❤️💛❤️💛❤️💛❤️

[elderwisp]

me trying to think a coherent question:

favourite album of 2024 so far?

PFFFFT me thinkin of an answer:

There are like so many albums I listened to this year and I noticed that this year, a lot of music has been much more upbeat whereas I feel like the last few years there were more ballads and such. Both are great in moderation but idk, this year I’ve found myself listening to things from start to finish and really trying to understand themes and the art behind it. IDK WHY I’M YAPPING I’M STALLING! OKAY BUT! I’m gonna pick three and a runner up I’M SORRY-

Hit Me Hard and Soft YOOO I haven’t listened to Billie as much in the past so this is like my introductory album to her and HOLY- I think Bittersuite is my all time favorite song by her, it’s clever in the lyrics but also the shifts in beat are just… Genius ! Blue is also emotionally packed and I almost forgot! Billie utilizes color in her lyrics which was SO COOL! I find that this album, Billie put herself out there emotionally and we get to see her process some feelings which is powerful!

Brat is genius in the use of lyrics backed up by the melodies it uses throughout. While this album is upbeat, I love how Charli explores these feelings most wouldn’t dare to bring up. Like Girl So Confusing brought tears to my eyes because there’s just so many moments that I’ve experienced like that and to see two people literally work things out on a freaking song is amazing. I also watched an interview where she like appreciates artists for their ability to write poetry in their lyrics but for her, it’s best when she says it straight up and I like that!

Romance on the other hand has lyrics that read like poetry, truly an album made for love and the multifaceted concept it is. Always a fan of stringed instruments being utilized and I believe it backs up the album perfectly. I find that the vocalist brings a level of intensity/personality in the way that he sings their lyrics and it adds a whole other element to the album. Like in Death Kink he laughs in the song and in Starburster, he uses panicked gasps in the chorus and I just think that’s neat!

Imaginal Disk reminds me of something they’d play out of Meow Wolf. I love the utilization of synths backed up by the angelic vocals. On top of that there was this really neat detail in Image where the chorus goes “oh my god only 22 more minutes” but when a minute passes in the song, she switches up to “oh my god only 21 more minutes” and it’s just little details like that!

[historicallyaccuratecheese]

So...I have an update I'd like to give on my big tma analysis posts.

As I'm sure anyone who's been following them have noticed, these posts have been on hiatus for quite a while now, and...there's quite a few reasons for that, which I'd like to finally share. I'll go into more detail below the cut, but...it is for these reasons that I have ultimately decided to quit putting these posts out in their current form. I'm not going to stop sharing my thoughts, feelings and analysis on tma alltogether, far from it, but...I am going to drastically change the way I share those thoughts, feelings and analysis with others. Here's why.

Also, I’m going to make this my new pinned post, so here’s a link to the old one containing all of my previous tma analysis posts.

I want to start off by saying that...overall, writing these posts over the past seven months or so has been a wonderful experience, seriously. With massive hyperfixations like this, it can usually be hard to properly express everything I think about them, especially given how I usually have very little people to talk to about my interests in the first place. But writing these posts...has honestly kind of fixed that. I've been able to say almost everything I want to about this amazing work of fiction, document my experience listening to it for the first time, and meet some really kind people who are into the same thing as me, and are always offering lovely support for my writing. It's one of the most emotionally validating experiences I've ever had, and I cannot stress how grateful I am to everyone's who's offered me support and encouragement. However, while I have no intention of throwing this all away...the way I've decided to write these posts has admittedly led to a number of not so great things for my life and psychological state, and I would rather do away with those.

Firstly, it's no secret to anyone who's been reading these that they have been getting progressively longer and longer, to the point where my previous post on the final 10 episodes of Season 2 was the length of a goddamn novel. But...as much as I've tried to deny it, that ever expanding length has been making it more and more of a slog to write these. Like...the currently work-in-progress post on the first 10 episodes of Season 3, which isn't even halfway done, is already at roughly 60k words, and...I feel like that's a bit too much. And the thing is...I absolutely love tma, truly, but...listening to it has basically become a chore due to the monumental task I've put upon myself, and...I don't want it to feel like that. I want listening to tma to be something I can do for fun, and this...isn't always fun.

The feeling I get when I complete a part of the post on a certain episode, or read a lovingly made reply is still one of the best feelings I've ever had, but...I really want to go back to being able to listen to tma as a leisurely and pleasurable way of spending my time, rather than a duty I'm obliged to. I want to be able to catch up and get the chance to listen to The Magnus Protocol alongside the rest of the fandom as new episodes come out, a goal that is becoming more and more unrealistic as time goes on given the amount of time it takes me to write about an episode, let alone mentally unpack it with how much is happening.

It...might not come as much of a suprise that as of now, the most recent episode of tma I have listened to is MAG 85: Upon the Stair. An absolutely brilliant episode that I loved for its amazing storytelling and use of The Spiral, but...also one where it feels like an impossible task to write something coherent about. I spent literal weeks trying to write something that I felt expressed my thoughts on this episode in a clear way, but...I just couldn't do it, and it became harder and harder to write the more I put it off. I haven't even felt like I’m able to listen to the podcast I'm writing about in the first place ever since, all because I've been trying to jump over this very mentally taxing hurdle. Now, I assure you that I am not canning this entire project simply because of one intentionally impossible to comprehend episode. If I wanted to, I could very well just...skip writing about the episode and then continue onwards. But...I mention this because ultimately, the episode highlighted a lot of problems with my way of putting these out for me. It made me reach a point where I could no longer deny the fact that...writing these posts was not something I was doing for fun anymore. Not because of the quality of the show or because of pressure being put on me from others, far from it. Let me be perfectly clear when I say that tma is just as good as it has always been, if not the best it's ever been, and all of you have been nothing but extremely polite and ridiculously patient any time I've mentioned my struggles with writing. Rather...I think that by chaining myself to a responsibility I created, I have made this task less fun for myself, and...I don't think I can make it fun again without heavily changing the way that I approach it. This is all a very long-winded way of saying that...I want to enjoy myself. I want to get back to listening to tma for fun, I want to at the very least be able to listen to the final season of tmagp for the first time alongside other people, and...I just want to feel a bit more free.

However, it's not just my self-destructive behavior that's making it harder for me to write these. As I've mentioned before, it's quite frequent that I'm prevented from writing these...simply due to general life circumstances, some more negative than others. Right now, I'm...at a point in my life where I'm figuring a lot of things out, both in terms of how I feel about myself and in terms of how I'm going to approach life going forward. . You see, if I'm being completely honest, the reason I've been able to write posts these long in the first place is because...well, for one thing it's my autism and likely ADHD that I'm trying to get diagnosed and medicated for, the latter of which is...one of quite a few big stressful things that have been going on these past couple of months. But that aside...I've been a mostly shut-indoors person with a lot of free time on their hands, both of which are gradually waning over time. Right now, I'm trying to get out in the world a bit more, make some new friends and try some new things, and the preparation I'm doing for my exams is getting more and more serious and time-consuming by the day, and...hopefully, if I can get through these exams, I'll be able to leave the currently online-only school I'm at and finally get back out into the open world. ...Ok that got personal real quick, but my point it...there's a lot going on in life for me, and as much as I really do cherish all of this writing and rambling about this thing I really like...even I can realize that there's a point where the line is drawn, and I have to set my priorities straight. Right now, I'm discovering my place in the world, moving on to the next part of my life, even trying out some new hobbies when I get the chance, and...that might just mean I have to put these posts to the side.

Overall...I really do hate to do this. Like...a lot. I understand that this is probably pretty disappointing, especially after nearly two months of complete radio silence, and believe me, it's disappointing to me as well. I...felt really confident that I would be able to do this for...what will one day become 290 episodes of Magpod. But...I think I've needed to realize for a while now that...the way I'm writing these posts isn't doing me many favors. With how full my plate is going to become over the course of the next year or so, and with how I've been feeling about this whole project...I think I have to unfortunately give it a premature death.

....Well...not exactly. ...Come on, you didn't REALLY think I was going to put my spooky podcast hyperfixation in the garbage like that, did you? No way. Not a chance in hell. As I've said, listening to this podcast and being able to talk about it with all of these amazing people is one of the best things to ever happen to me, and I am not about to throw that experience to the wayside just like that. I still want to find a way to post all my thoughts and theories on this lovely work of art, and talk about it with other people, just...maybe in a way that's not nearly as much of an expense of my time and energy. Because, like...as cathartic as it is to gaze upon my 80,000 word long wall of text, it...really doesn't give me much more than an ego boost and bragging rights, and...those are not nearly as valuable to me as all of the stuff I just mentioned. Hell, I don't think the overall format of my posts is necessary to get my points across...at all. Like, yeah, I think it has a pretty nice structure, but...I don't think I need to re-itterate myself nearly as much as I do, and...be honest, are the recaps of episodes REALLY all that needed? Because...like...I know that they can be helpful to anyone reading them who hasn't listened to tma in a while, but...sorry if this is blunt, but if you REALLY can't remember some miscellaneous detail I mention...honestly just google it. Like...I swear I am not going to try and gaslight you in my tma analysis posts, unless it's in a funny Michael-core way. Basically, all of this is a...fittingly long-winded way of saying that I'm still going to be posting my thoughts on tma, just...in a different form. Here's the plan.

Rather than release super comprehensive gigantic essays every ten episodes, I think I'm going to just opt to release short little...collections of bullet points, which will put out my thoughts, feelings and theories on the episode I just listened to (most of the time anyways, if I for whatever reason don't have the time to make one then I'll just put my thoughts alongside the post for the next episode), albeit in a much more informal, insane brainrot, freaking out all over the place sort of way. ...Ok, that's hyperbole, I'll still try my best to sound coherent. It might not be nearly as structured as my previous way of writing this, but it'll be way easier for me to write and much less time-consuming, while still hopefully managing to get everything I want to say out there for other people to see. Hell, doing it like this might make it so that it's easier for others to digest, and might display thoughts that are even fresher in my mind as well.

And...even then, I still want to put out the occasional big essay post here and there. Probably not as big as something like my last Season 2 post, but...just a lot more of a structured and well thought out script if you catch my drift. These won't be coming out on any sort of clear and discernable schedule mind you, just...whenever I both feel like it and have the time to write it. If there's an episode, character or concept that I feel really deserves a deep dive, or a big grandiose theory that I want to explain in great detail, then...that'll get its own dedicated post. I already know that I want to make a big post all about Michael whenever his character finally gets some more explanation, along with a post detailing my overall thoughts and feelings on the podcast both after I finish MAG 200 and for when The Magnus Protocol finishes, probably some retrospective stuff much later down the line, and likely a bunch of other stuff that hasn't even crossed my mind yet. Rest assured that...I am not stopping any time soon. I still want to use this blog to talk about this podcast in some way, shape or form as I make my way through it, I just...might need to change my method of doing so into something that's...a little bit nicer to myself. And hey, if you have any suggestions as to how I continue this going forward, please let me know. If anyone wants to see what I had initially planned for my first post on Season 3, that's still in my drafts and I'd be more than willing to post it, even if it feels a little bit anticlimactic. I just hope that the people who have enjoyed hearing my thoughts will be willing to stick around, even if I express those thoughts a little bit differently. :) ...And before anyone says it I am more than aware of the irony of writing an essay about why I refuse to write essays.

Well...thanks to everyone who read this. I hope that everyone's ok with my decision here. Ultimately, there is a part of me that will miss the feeling of being able to marvel at posts so big that I made, but...at the end of the day, if I can find a way to finally feel unconstrained by self-inflicted tasks every day without guilt, and make greater progress in my social, personal and academic life, AND still be able to share my thoughts on tma with others despite all of that, then...I think the essay format is a sacrifice I'm (mostly) willing to make. Maybe doing this might also allow me to share other creations of mine on this hellsite if people are at all interested. I'm trying to get better at drawing and would love to post some art for both tma and other hyperfixations when I'm feeling more confident, and maybe write things for other topics as well. ...I don't know how many people who follow me are familiar with Hollow Knight lore, but I've been replaying the game for a Steel Soul run after a good while of not having touched it, and...let's just say that I have made some interesting discoveries that I haven't seen anyone else talk about before. But...that's a topic for another time. Anyways, I'd just like to put out some special thanks to some of the biggest supporters of this whole project, even if it's earlier than I expected to do so.

@b100k, for introducing me to tma in the first place and being an overall great friend who always lets me incoherently ramble about an episode immediately after I finish it.

Both @theguiltinessisyours and @spookygiantturtleshoe-blog for always having left lovely replies on my posts ever since they discovered them

And finally, anyone who has taken the time to read, like, reblog or reply to even one of these posts at any point in time. As corny as it sounds, all of you really do make my day a little bit brighter every time I see one of you :)

Well...that's all from me. Once again, thanks so much for reading, and...I hope you'll enjoy whatever I make next.

[roamingtigress]

Yet more observations playing Dutch in Red Dead Online (I couldn't find something for today's Yeehawgust prompt so you'll be hearing another one of my hopefully coherent ramblings on the mustache):

-He doesn't just turn and run, he often does this over the shoulder and looks at you and does his kinda awkward u-turn thing before breaking into his run. You're a dude, not a deer, silly. It's a bit of breaking the fourth wall with eye contact, watch-my-back sort of thing which is cool. I feel he did do this in Storymode with Arthur but trying to remember what chapter/scene. It's actually a bit hard to 'steer' him into running because of this and he's been hit by a wagon.

-He can get SCRAPPY if there are players melee'ing nearby and if they happen to jump into him, he'll join in on them. While realistic It's EMBARASSING and I try to pull him out of it fast. Gets EXCITED and REACTIVE and SHOUTY in crowds. Maybe he just DOESN'T DO CROWDS. Much like me, so no judgement

-Seemingly random things will cause him to unholster; such as sudden swerving of the wagons. A wagon going by too fast. A passing NPC got startled by this and shot his hat off. It's a bit EMBARASSING around other players.

-He seems to have a limp? The left leg seems to have a tendency to just really swing over his right; really noticeable when watching him from behind (which I see most of him that way so it really sticks out to me), I have seen him do this in Storymode as well. I'm trying to get good shot at it.

-Most awkward parkour participant in the West. The grace of an elephant. I need to do a photoshoot of it and video if I can find a good, easy program for capturing the action. He lands like an octopus falling out of a tree.

-His coding seems that they've made him camp centric; his stamina/health will drain even when he's in the saddle and I feed him dozens of the stuff. Once I return him to camp for a bit, he'll be good to go after a refresh. If he's been away for camp for some time (or if I haven't used the Wilderness Camp), I'll be prompted to REST him.

-99.9% sure I caught him DOZING IN THE SADDLE until Sienna shook and woke him up. That was cute.

-HE PLAYS WITH THE REINS LIKE WE USED TO (OR STILL DO) WITH THE TELEPHONE CORD. You just know he twirls his hair like that too.

-Because he doesn't have a satchel, EVERYTHING GOES IN HIS PANTS or PANTS POCKET or GUN BELT. Imagine having 30 pieces of beef, 10 frogs, 10 squirrels idk how many fish, all in your pocket. Or pants. And Dutch wonders why wolves come out in droves when he steps out of camp.

Hosea has a different rein holding STYLE. Dutch holds his hands closer together on the reins, Hosea holds his hands out further.

I highly recommend the experience if you want to play a character that needs some maintenance and care and adult supervision, doesn't care about the waypoint to their destination but the journey, and don't mind being kept on their feet :) I love documenting and sharing these bits of detail and what he gets up to!

[pippuns]

Youve made me curious, what's Tai Sui about? What's the appeal 👀👀

LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT THE APPEAL ANON!!

tai sui is an absolutely fantastically written steampunk xianxia novel that acts as a deconstruction of the xianxia genre!! if you like detailed world building, questions about the cost of immortality, what makes a god, and identity, themes about environmentalism, class, autonomy, the power of names, and just incredible levels of emotional damage (broken up by the funniest and most annoying (/affectionate) protagonist around), tai sui is for you!!

which is to say. this novel was engineered to make me specifically absolutely lose it LOL

i kept on trying to make this post both coherent and not long and i have given up. here is a bunch of words of me yelling about how much i love tai sui below the page break.

TAI SUI IS SO!!! MY BRAIN!!! ITS BEING REWRITTEN!!!

there is literally no one in the main cast i dont like. they're all so funny in their own ways and so likeable!! I genuinely have such a difficult time picking my favorite character in tai sui because they're all so interesting and well-written, and i love seeing them interact with each other

part of this absolutely has to do the protagonist, xi ping, who is just the funniest man around. he's also the most annoying and i want to see him crushed like a bug (/affectionate). he's really good at bouncing off of other characters, and i love seeing him drag other folks into Problems and Situations and just being a general force of chaos and mayhem in the world

it's also really good that he's so funny and lighthearted because tai sui has some really tragic moments!! it gets fucking sad!! i've cried multiple times and i don't usually cry at media!! i only just finished book three!!

tai sui is also really good at writing women!! i love tai sui women so much. i don't really have much more to say about this but like. gender and wlw win <3

another thing tai sui does that i like a lot is zoom out to focus on the ways the events of the novel are affecting ur average day folks. when i say ''tai sui is about class and environmental issues'' i mean they don't just like, say it in the narration and then not elaborate on it. we explicitly see how people are being affected by the way the world is governed and the hardships they are forced to live through. it's not really left to your imagination.

but something i also really really like is that while priest does show the hardship that characterizes the lives of the people, they also show the ways in which people struggle to live on regardless.

tai sui is about tragedy in a lot of ways, but it's not a tragedy they take lying down, and it's not like people don't find their own moments of happiness in spite of the hard lives they live. which is really important to me!! its something i genuinely appreciate from the narration so much!! yes, life is hard. yes, things are difficult. and yes, people find a way to continue on regardless!!!!

PUNCHES A WALL. IM SO EMOTIONAL ABOUT TAI SUI.

ALSO THE NARRATION IS SO GORGEOUS??? LIKE HELLO??? IM LITERALLY OBSESSED WITH THE PROSE. EATS IT WHOLE LIKE IM A BURMESE PYTHON. or uh. like im going out to a gyro place with my friends and i get so focused on eating the food that i don't notice that i'm eating the sandwich paper wrap until a fair amount of it is chowed down haha :')

i also mentioned this a little on my side twitter but the way tai sui is formatted is also really fun to me. like. it feels like a tv show with the way the scenes change and the cliff hangers the chapters end on sometimes. which is why it really doesn't feel like its 900k words. you just keep going and then BOOM ur done with a book. the real reason im doodling my way through this novel is to force myself to go slow. bc otherwise i would have finished it in a week (there is something wrong with me).

anyways please read tai sui

[starpros-sunshine]

also i think that after seeing that Something is going out with his eichisama tori should also sneak into town to go and see what's the deal with this wataru guy. and he inevitably gets lost but meets hajime and they have a bonding moment barbie movie-style and him and tomoya help tori meet wataru. and then wataru sees tomoya and goes "oho! interesting child!" which once again leads to eichi unreasonable jealousy against this poor random kid

Okay so I've been thinking on this and I've been trying to get something coherent and bear with me right right.

(this got so long again I just started going into detail and detail and detail and oh god I am so sorry)

So Tori, poor, innocent Tori, has to come to terms with the fact that Eichi is hiding something from him (that "Something" being a tall blue-haired extra of unknown origin) and he knows that, technically, the mature thing would be to leave it alone. Eichi will have his reasons for being a little secretive about it. He has his own life and if he doesn't want to be open about...whatever it is that seems to be going on there.... then he doesn't have to be because the man has a right to privacy.

Tori knows that. But Tori also knows that being mature doesn't matter if, technically, his beloved Eichi-sama could be at risk of giving his heart away to a scoundrel that only wishes to play with him until he's bored and then throws him away, breaking Eichis heart in the process. We couldn't have that! And what if he's a criminal? Can you really trust someone who snoops around on other peoples property without their knowing? No you can't! So really it's only natural Tori wants to know what that guys deal is. Out of a genuine concern for his friend. Of course.

And so obviously it's a completely acceptable and normal and rational decision when he sees that Yuzuru isn't there for a moment to keep watch over him like the guard dog that he is (really Tori isn't a child anymore there's no need to be so overprotective) and the other staff members also don't seem to be around and Eichi is also nowhere to be seen, that he decides to take his coat and pack his little bag with some money (read: more money than just "some" money) and tries to sneak out of the house and down the path across the small meadow and the bit of forest that separates their not-so-humble abode from the small town where the other people live.

His inital plan simple. Go there; ask around a little, maybe try some tailing (after hearing stories from the other aristocrats about how one is able to hire people to follow their spouses around without them noticing - and that apparently being an actual thing people earn their money with - he's decided that it can't be that hard and he should try his luck.) and then leaving as quickly as possible, lest Yuzuru die of a heart attack after finding out Tori dissappeared. It would be quick and easy and nobody would ever find out. That was the original plan. But Tori very soon comes to find that that could prove harder than he thought when he notices he actually really really enjoys the feeling of not having anyone hover over him like some sort of falcon watching their prey.

The little river running by the path through the meadow is still frozen (It is winter after all) and the snow on the ground almost reaches his ankles. The 15 minute walk takes him 30 because he keeps jumping around in the snow (He's made three snow angels by now. For a second he has to think of his sister and of how nice it would be if she were here with him too and how they could make snow angels together were it not for her having to stay with their parents, but he pushes that thought to the back of his head again and decides to move on with his way).

When he eventually arrives at the town - and after just wandering aimlessly through the rather empty streets - there are three major epiphanies.

The first one is that he doesn't have a clear destination. He has no idea where to look for the blue-haired weirdo. The second is that, seeing as it is a forenoon in january, most people probably aren't spending their time outside. And if they are then they are at a different place than where he is. And the third and final one: He is completely and utterly lost.

It should be regarded as an accomplishment really. Getting lost in a town with a population of barely 300 locals living there. Indeed Tori would think it impossible. Yet here he is. If anything he's sure he's at least the only one who can claim this feat for himself. This is fine. He has this under control. If he just keeps walking then he's sure to come out somewhere (No there are no tears in his eyes anyone who says otherwise is just imagining things (he decidedly ignores the little voice in his head that tells him "Who's gonna say otherwise. Look around yourself, have you forgotten that you're all alone here?")). So the big brave boy that he is he marches onward, ignoring the way his fingers have started to feel numb from the cold and his eyes have not stopped watering and the little voice in the back of his head that tells him he should've just listened to Yuzuru (He banishes that one to the deepest depths of his subconscious very quickly. There are blows that his pride can take in these situations and then there's having to agree with "You should've just listened to Yuzuru". If There is one thing that can be said about Tori then it's that he is not one to simply give up. He has come this far and he'll be damed if he backs out now).

Lost in thought and not paying much attention to his surroundings (he has more important things to think about right now), he only manages to register a flash of blue in his peripheral vision. And because this could be what he's come here for in the first place but more importantly because this is a person and that is where the bar is set, Tori immediately tries to follow them. If Lady Luck is especially nice to him this time she lets this person be the mysterious stranger he's been looking for, but what feels like a day of walking through empty streets in the biting cold of a noon in late january have humbled him enough to not push it with his luck.

And when he turns the corner, calling out for the figure to wait, insted of the strange man he was expecting he comes face-to-face with a meekish looking boy with blue hair and big violet eyes and next to him there's a second boy, this one able to be described in all aspects with only one word: average. And for a solid ten seconds they all just stare at each other.

Tori doesn't really know how, he really has no idea, but somehow he ended up following the two home. Or, well, more or less. Following isn't really the right word here. After their almost-staring-competition on the street the meekish looking one with the blue hair asked him if he was alright because "he seemed lost" (he absolutely did not.) which then prompted an entire series of events that ended is Tori sitting in this strangers families home - with an entirely different stranger also there - getting a serving of what he assumes to be radish soup. Tori feels a little sorry for the boy, Tomoya, as he said his name was, who seemed like he was previously engaged in a conversation with the other boy, who later introduced himself as Hajime and who had spent the entire way asking him questions about how he ended up here and what someone like him was doing all alone in a sleepy village neighbourhood like theirs and if he really didn't need a tissue (He hadn't cried while explaining how he was lost. He totally hadn't) and on and on and on as Tomoya had to awkwardly walk behind them.

So now, sitting at this table with these two people who he has only met today and who have given him a bowl of soup to warm himself up with, he has to tell everything about how he ended up in this situation in the first place. At the end of his recollection of this oh so wonderful day he is met with two pitying looks an a laugh - apparently one of Hajimes younger siblings had joined them at their little impromptu gathering (he wonders, distantly, how his own sister is doing right now).

And as he's about to say that he should probably make his way home and resume his mission another time when he has a map, Hajime mentions that he actually knows the guy Tori is talking about and that he lives at the local inn and that that isn't that far from them and that he and Tomoya can walk him there if he wants to. Tori agrees immediately. He is so over trying to be discreet about it at this point he really just wants some sort of success in this kind of ridiculous endeavour he's set out on.

So after the soup is finished and his limbs don't feel like they're about to fall off anymore the trio goes on their merry way and Tori feels a little silly because for all the walking around he did before they reach this inn really pretty quickly... maybe he should've thought to bring a map... The three of them venture further into the inn, and Tori only overhears Hajime talking to an older woman, but he's more occupied with looking around the place. It's father homely and rustic, a completely different atmosphere than at their place. There are noises from the few patrons sitting at the tables and chatting with each other, but it only add to the cozy feeling of the entire place.

When Hajime comes back he leads Tori up a little stairway and down a dimly lit hallway. They stop in front of a door at the very end of it (in my head there's a bit of a terasse thing happening there like. you can look down into the part where the tables are and such right right) and Tori barely has time to mentally prepare for the fact that this really is happening now before Hajime knocks and the sound of muffled steps approaching the door can be heard.

When the door finally opens (it's been a few seconds at best but it feels like an eternity), Tori is greeted by the lovely view of a pair of pale clavicles, barely covered by a black linen blouse. He has to actively look up to look at the face of their owner and when he is met with a pair of sharp, purple eyes he feels like his throat just sew itself shut. Hajime explains to Wataru that Tori was looking for him and suddenly a light seems to go up above Watarus head as a look of recognition flashes over his face and he turns around to Tori again and asks him if he's "the princess that Eichi's been telling him all about". Tori is confused. Hajime decides that this is his cue to leave and he slowly backs away to go back down and collect Tomoya, who's been roped into helping out with the catering by some elder gentleman (Wataru watches Hajime as he collects Tomoya and they leave, intrigued by this strangely average boy, as Tori just stares in horror as the realisation dawns upon him that he is now completely alone with this man whom he didn't even intend on speaking to in the first place).

So now he is here. In this very awkward situation. Sitting on a chair in this strangers room (for the second time today! Did he ever have a day this eventful? Who knows! Tori for sure doesn't.). He wants to talk, but Wataru is faster and asks him what he's doing here. Tori doesn't really know how to reply. How do you talk your way around having to tell someone that you actually got lost on the way to spy on them. That's right. You can't. Well, Eichi could. But Tori is Tori and he never wished for that to change more than he did now.

He looks out of the window and it is at that moment that another three major epiphanies reach him. Firstly that he doesn't know what to do now that he's here, secondly that he's going to get murdered by Yuzuru (and if worst comes to worst also Eichi) once he gets back because he's been gone all day without telling anyone and they're probably all worried sick, and last but not least: it is dark outside. He can't go home like that. He is virtually stuck in this predicament he found himself in.

Wataru seems to have a similar thought, because the immediate follow up question after not really getting a coherent answer from Tori is if anyone knows he's gone. Tori shakes his head. If Tsukasa ever finds out about this mess of a situation he will have to die because he would never let Tori live that down.

He gets ripped out of his incoming spiral by the bird that takes a seat on his head and Watarus over-the-top contemplative sigh and the slight lilt in his voice when he voices the next issue that's in the room. He isn't even speaking to Tori anymore, but to his bird that sits on Toris head, Jeanne, and Tori is starting to get annoyed by the way he jokes about this entire thing, calling Tori a "a little bird that escaped its nest", as if he isn't stuck having to prepare for his untimely demise. And by the way this guy hasn't put down his cryptic smile and teasing voice ever since he entered the room. When he thinks things can't get any more awkward for him Wataru proposes two options. Either he walks him home, or Tori has to stay at the inn for the night and he brings him back in the morning. Tori decides he'd rather go back home sooner than later (he'll have to take the lacture either way and he's probably caused everyone enough worries by now anyways. And also he misses his bed.). So Wataru grabs his coat, quickly goes to tell the inn-keepers he's "bringing retuening the princess to ger people" (Tori doesn't know if he liked the bird comparison better or not).

The way back is still very tense because Tori does not dare to walk next to Wataru (he's sketchy it's not Toris fault it's a normal reaction) and so he just awkwardly walks behind him, He doesn't really watch his surroundings - it is dark and the only nice thing is that it's snowing and there are animal sounds and they are spooky and he needs to watch the way and it's easier to think that way - until suddenly he gets hit by a snowball right in the head. And he is so baffled by this that he just stares at Wataru, and Wataru grins at him with his stupid stupid grin and somehow they end up in a snowball fight on this meadow where the only reason you can see anything is because of the snow and when they finally arrive at the mansion they both have so much snow in their hair and their clothes are wet from the melted snow and when they knock on the door and wait for someone to open Wataru gets some of the snow out of Toris hair and says that that snowball fight can be their little shared secret and Tori grins back at him and agrees and when the door opens and both of them are frantically ushered in by a maid that tells another one to get Yuzuru and Eichi Tori decides that maybe this guy isn'r so bad after all. Maybe he's actually quite nice.

[foultastemusic]

EP Review - Here, Hear. IV – La Dispute (2024)

This EP was the best gift that 2024 could give me, and we're still only in March. A game between the traumas in the stories recounted in La Dispute's first "great" albums - Somewhere at the Bottom of the River Between Vega and Altair (2008) and Wildlife (2011) - revolutionary for the experimental world of midwest emo, post-hardcore and the underground community in general, and the latest works of art that are most listened to and reflected on, which tell us through the details of everyday life, feelings, landscapes and images open to the listener's imagination - Rooms of the House (2014) and Panorama (2019) - when recitation becomes part of the post-hardcore trends.

Despite the pained voice and the contrasts that create the perfect synthesis of the guitars and bass, the rhythmic coherence of the drums and the literary personality of the band that has always been faithful to us from the beginning until today, elements that have created the "brand image", I notice that these geniuses of emo music don't mind experimenting with new electronics, the absence of screams and distortions, love, new ways of saying things. The fact that we can't catalog and put aesthetic labels on certain artists, because they are constantly metamorphosing and contradicting themselves with the genres given by fans and record companies, certain types of festivals and events, algorithms of streaming platforms, etc., is a proof that the post-hardcore of these bands that continue to record over the years is maturing as a movement. And this EP has made me reflect on my generation, which adapts to trends by not adapting to it at all. Perhaps silences and improbable harmonic resolutions are the oxygen pump for artists and listeners of music created in a studio as if it’s a laboratory.

Here, Hear. is a collection of four volumes, the first of which was released in 2008, the band's big bang year. In the four volumes, we can see that La Dispute exploded at the beginning and took their own advantage of the sounds in a very genuine, pure and direct way, unashamed to use unconventional instruments such as pianos, maracas and “folklorized” melodies - always recognizable on a timbral level, anyway - but it was in this last one, sixteen years later, that we see the band flourish, not in an explosive way as before, but always pure and honest. They reinforce simplicity and the timeless stories. Sixteen, the fourth song on the EP, and one that had been released before on Spotify, marks a new life of La Dispute: it reminds me of the walks I had to school when I was fourteen and of my first crush had dedicated the song Such Small Hands (2008) to me in anonymity; of the song Woman (In the Mirror) (2014) when I was always at home trying to discover my own way of (always hidden) teenage happiness. Today I've discovered how happy I can be and that the nostalgia for the sadness, heartbreak and melancholy that went on in the corners of my neighborhood while I listened to La Dispute's entire discography for most of the years I lived there is part of it. We were sad listening to sad music, and happiness, today, is based on that. This single, according to my empirical experience and to the community of fans writing online as well, reminds us of those nostalgic times.

And the group's aesthetic minimalism continues. Not just in the music, but in the band's overall image. And I'm enjoying watching it. The lyrics and stories increasingly make sense, since the instrumental part of the EP makes them prevail. In the song Reformation, which concludes the EP in a mode of ecstatic tranquillity, we have a beautiful guitar that harps along with Jordan Dreyer's unsung and unshouted voice. Just like that. Everything that the music of sensitive people needed to offer about the art of growing up and noticing life's little symbols, even when you drink your coffee in the morning before facing the life of an adult who is emotionally trapped by the years that have passed.

«You awake at 3AM to the soft voice of her dream, saying

"These are the people who said that you like him would never die

Until you do and you will and I will too

Just like this, baby, but longer, forever

And there's nothing past that door, I know it"

Before she drifts back to sleep where you can't now and it's okay

Peace be with you»

Reformation, La Dispute (2024)

[yeyinde]

Lev!!! you cannot just post that masterpiece and dip. I cannot breathe. I'm grinning like a fucking baffon in my room and thank god it's sunday or else I sure would've call in sick. I'm not kidding. I have no self control and I would've read this at my workplace and God, I don't want to picture me squirming in my seat with a 60yr old woman sitting 2 feet away.

the way you write, smut or not, you include these tiny little details that people wouldn't notice, not even in real life, not even during that particular moment of ecstacy and somehow make it even more smuttier(?). it's never in and out with a grunt here and growl there with your works. it's a whole fucking experience and I have to have a mini freak out and mentally prepare myself before I read any of your work. your single fic is better than many published books I've read.

God, I would love to sit inside your brain and intercept every single one of your tho(ugh)t processes, analyze why you decided to put one particular word over another and such (also I was picturing Price on all fours until you mentioned that he was on his back. what's your thought process there?).

anyway, I'll rb your fic after I have an another proper meltdown so that I can get access to some coherent thoughts and the ability to string words together.

p.s:(I would very much like to deck that one editor that told me fanfic is not real writing and shove this masterpiece down their throat)

p.p.s: I get anxious when I send ask without anon ( don't know why) but I really wanted to send that pic cause that's what it looked like when you posted it.

p.p.p.s: (this is the last one promise) were you listening to purity ring when you wrote it? why that song? sorry for the long ass ask.

OMGGGGGGG for some reason, this does not show up on tumblr mobile - which is what I primarily use unless I'm posting a fic! So I am so so so sorry it took so long for me to reply!!

And AHHHHHH!! This is too much for me, honestly! You're way too nice about the rampant filth I write!!!! I had so many emotions reading this that I can't even begin to process ANY of them!! THANK YOU!!!

As for some of the questions posed:

With Price, I tried to be as true to his character (or the way I perceive his character) as I could be when I wrote this. I know it's just smut, and pegging smut at that!, but I like realism in whatever I read and since I usually write stuff that I like, I needed to include it. It had to make sense to me. I don't think Price would do this with just anyone, but if he mentioned it - he wants it. He was fairly confident through the whole thing, whereas MC was freaking out. I liked the contrast between their characters.

I don't think he'd be inclined to be on his knees for the first time. It would be something he needs to build up to before he gives up that aspect of himself. This was already quite a heavy experience, and so. It just made sense to me that he'd be on his back, with MC over him so he can watch their expressions, and take in the experience as it flickers over their face.

It's also infinitely more intimate, which is what - in Price's head - was the goal?? Like, it was a hot moment, but it was also fostering more trust, and taking a deeper plunge into their relationship. It delves into this a bit more at the end when MC finally has a moment to step away from "JESUS I AM "BALLS" DEEP INSIDE CAP PRICE RIGHT NOW" and look at things with a wider perspective.

It also gives him a modicum of control as well. Which, I think is the basal aspect of his character.

That's quite wordy for what this fic is, OMG. That's sort of what I volleyed back and forth in my head before writing this one.

And I was listening to Purity Ring!!! I rediscovered them through Letterkenny and this song is quite intense to me. The lyrics are just so PERFECT. All of my fics have connecting songs to them that either set the tone when I was writing or explore a different facet of what I want to convey through the lyrics. Usually, it's just atmosphere, but for Fineshrine - it was both!

Ahh, I get so nervous when stuff gets so wordy!!!!! Sorry for the spiel!

This was such a lovely message, and I am so gutted I only found it now. Thank you so much! It genuinely baffles me when people take an interest in my thoughts behind the smut, but this absolutely made my entire week. I will not stop thinking about this - I just know it. AHHHHHH. You're way too sweet!!!!

[ari--anon]

Hi! Big fan of your writing! If it’s not too much to ask:

How do you keep track of the small details you add in your writing? Especially the mega master writings. I find myself not writing for a while and struggling to remember or find the small infinitesimal detail I may or may not have mentioned - in order to keep coherency.

Hi, thank you :D

There's two way I keep track of details. First off, (and this saved me many times), I have a beta reader (friend of mine) who will often remember stuff I don't, and point it out in scenes where bringing that detail up would be plausible, or even if I completely contradicted something I've written before

Then I usually make a note of things that I should keep track of in a separate document, which is sort of a place where I dump all my chapter ideas. It doesn't have to be anything complicated, just a quick mention like "remember x!"

For example, me and my beta reader will often make rudimentary floorplans for rooms the characters will spend a lot of time in. These are made in ms paint and are really ugly, but I always come back to them to see where the characters are in relation to the room. (Plus this is a good way to initially really visualize the room!)

Or before I'm writing, I will make a really simple list of information to every character, and I will update it as I go. This includes stuff like age and important bits of appearance that stray from the norm, and then a sentence that describes the core of their character. You could do something similar with the chapters as you're writing them, so you'll always have an up-to-date list.

I know that taking notes is not for everyone, though, so this might not be good advice. Everyone has their own system that they need to crack, and I'm certainly still trying to settle into mine. Maybe, if notes aren't working for you, you could try to do it in a more visual way.

Like, if they pick up an item in chapter 4 that you want the character to use from then on, but you have trouble remembering, you could take a sticky note, write 'chapter 4' on top, and draw that item, and keep it close to your computer/laptop/writing paper. (Or if you write on your phone, I know that many notes apps have a function to draw on them too. It doesn't have too look pretty, you just have to know what it is! Like drawing a letter on your hand to remember something you need to do later)

If it's more abstract things, like a string of thought a character had that you think a character should hold onto for the story, this might get a bit more difficult, but I think that if you draw something related to it (even if it's just a thought bubble or something), you will most likely remember what it meant, even if vaguely.

But this is all stuff you do before, or during writing. I know this bit is difficult, especially when you've written A LOT but I guess the easiest way to keep track is to just read through it again.

But it's really important to remember that it's fine to go back and fix stuff! That's the fun part of posting online. If it's a matter of if a dress was white or red, and nothing you considered worth writing down (we can't put everything down after all) then I assure you, the minority of readers will catch if you change that up.

I'm currently going through iawwc again before posting the last chapter, because I'm looking out for exactly those type of details that might've gone under as I've been writing. Especially in those mega works that take a while to read and write, readers will often not notice if you changed a past chapter up so that it fits your current stand of things. So don't worry too much about this. Oftentimes when a detail went under, it probably wasn't that important in the first place, and can easily be cut out/changed.

I hope this helped, and thank you sm for your ask!

[lampmanliveblogs]

His Hollow Mind...

Here is the post I promised I’d make talking about some of the details I missed in the paintings. A huge shoutout to @thequietmanno1 who sent me all of these higher-quality images. As it turns out, there were quite a few things I missed. So let’s go over some of them. 

These are not all the images I was sent, these are just the ones I thought were notable enough to talk about.

Starting out with one that I think I missed altogether because I don’t remember seeing this one. Well, we see Philip and Brother playing. Philip is wearing the wooden mask and using the toy sword Brother made for him. Brother is wearing a classic witch hat, which leads me to believe that Philip is playing the role of a witch hunter. Combined with the following image…

In the painting, we see the brothers Wittebane playing, with people in the background holding pitchforks. I think the implication here is that the brothers saw or heard about the witch trials going on around them while they were growing up and as kids do, they were playing it… even if they didn’t fully understand what was going on.

I had such a difficult time getting a good look at this one when doing the liveblog. I could never quite pause at the right time, Hunter kept blocking the view. After a while, I gave up and resigned myself to a fate of a half-obscured painting.

Now that I can get a good look at this one, I can see Philip looking disapprovingly at his brother holding hands with a witch.

Speaking of things I didn’t notice on the first time through… how about the fact that there are three people in this painting? Yeah, I’m not sure how that happened, she (assuming it’s the same witch from the other paintings) is wearing a bright red cloak. My eyes must’ve tricked me.

Anyways, this combined with the previous painting is starting to paint a clearer picture of what happened…

I bring this one up because in my liveblog I said that it looked like Philip might’ve been in his monstrous form here. Upon closer examination, I don’t think so, I think it’s just because Philip is covered in shadows here. Oh, and Brother is holding a knife of his own, which I didn’t notice before.

This is another case when there was a big part of the painting that I just didn’t see; Philip didn’t tattoo the glyphs onto his arm, he cut them with a knife. The same knife he used to kill his brother with by the looks of it, though I’m not 100% if this would take place before or after that event.

Speaking of the things Philip has done to himself, one reader brought up that in this one, the implication is supposed to be that he cut his own ears to be pointy. Which honestly makes me think of Opal Kobi from the Artemis Fowl books, except, you know… the other way around.

(there are some interesting parallels between Philip/Belos and Opal now that I think about it… or maybe I’m just in an Opal mood since she made a cameo in my latest fanfic)

I also got some better images of the paintings of the previous Golden Guards. In my liveblog, when I first saw this one, I said it looked like a triumphant pose, but on closer look… no, he was petrified. Right in the middle of standing up to Belos, by the looks of it. I also got to see that two other previous Golden Guards met their ends by being blasted with red magic and one was (possibly) buried (alive).

So about Brother Wittebane…

Now, based on these paintings I’ve managed to put together a sorta coherent story.

Once upon a time, the brother’s Wittebane lived and grew up in a newly founded town in Connecticut called Gravesfield circa 1635. This was at the time the Connecticut Witch Trials were going on, so the brother grew up hearing stories of witches and those brave who hunted them. They often played games together based on these stories.

At some point, they encountered togehter a strange woman in the woods, one with marvelous powers from out of this world. A witch. As we see, Brother Wittebane was fascinated and excited by this, while Philip… was not so much.

Somehow, they end up in the Demon Realm. The exact sequence of events at this point are not entierly clear to me, but we know for a fact that Philip was looking for a way home. It’s possible that his brother too sought a way home and followed him on this journey, at least for some time. 

However, there was a rift growing between the brothers. Brother was, ah… fraternizing with the witches, which Philip disapproved of. Brother seems to have made very good friends with one witch in particular, Possibly the same one they met in the woods who brought them to the Demon Realm.

At some point, Philip began experimenting with magical powers he ought not to have. By consuming the life force of palismen, his body begins to mutate and he turns into a monstrous form, though his brother still loves him.

Philip on the other hand… does the unthinkable and kills his own brother. Brother’s awesome girlfriend blasts Philip with a magic spell and that’s the last seen of her (for now…?).

(see what I did there? I’m drawing parallels between Brother and Luz as they were both humans who came to the Demon Realm and made friends with the people there and got awesome witch girlfriends. Unlike a certain someone I could name)

At some point, Philip gets the idea of the Day of Unity and starts working on it. He meets Luz and Lilith on their time travel excursion and he gets the scar on his face.

After that, he dons the identity of Belos and begins campaigning across the Isles, trying to sell his Coven system, which he needs for his Day of Unity plans to work. He also creates the first grimwalker.

That’s roughly the timeline of events. There are a lot of unanswered questions still that I’m looking forward to finding the answers to. Maybe I’ll find out in the next episode, whenever I get around to it. Until then, take care of the planet Earth and remember that anything can happen in space!

[imperial-nuisance-rudje]

Chipped away a bit more at chapter 4 since I now have a device that doesn't crash half the time in multipart fights, and while I had to lie down (unfortunately I think Limbus (Bigsize) effects trigger my migraines 😔) I am absolutely fascinated by the implications so far.

Discussion of spoilers up to chapter 4-31 under the cut, along with more general story ramblings. Not super coherent, as a warning, just getting thoughts down.

So I've made myself marginally more cultured by looking into the source material for the Sinners whose references I'm wholly unfamiliar with—not deeply, unfortunately I find it really hard to focus on reading without meds, but like, basic summaries for some of the ideas behind the choices (which at least let me appreciate Ryōshū more, though I still don't particularly like her), and while that doesn't super help for our focus of the hour just because Yi Sang's source is super abstract in a way I am given to understand translates extremely poorly, it piques my interest for future sinners who previously mostly passed under my notice because they're relatively low-key (Mersault. It's Mersault.) or bc I was so utterly unfamiliar that I missed thematic implications from their source (Hong Lu, Yi Sang (kinda, a bit, again it's apparently incredibly hard to translate), Ryōshū, Sinclair).

...I'd joke that I at least knew Gregor and Heathcliff but its been so long I don't remember actual details from Wuthering Heights or Metamorphosis. (Okay, technically I know Faust and Donqui too, but they're cases of not actually being familiar with the source so much as the source being literary background radiation.)

Anyway.

I am just utterly fascinated by all the implications by Yi Sang being the creator of the mirrors, and also by the implication of a monochrome photograph with Yo Sang in it. (I am once again asking ProjMoon to tell me how old literally anyone is, though I can at least discount the narrator calling everyone children as indicative of age on account of that's probably Carmen.) I'm also wildly curious as to what the effect of being Fucking Stabbed by a golden bough is, I don't know if the scene with Dante after the stab was metaphorical or on some level literal and the nature of the Golden Boughs makes me reluctant to just go "yeah it's metaphor" since they themselves are on some level metaphor made physical.

I am extremely suspicious of the scientist guy, he's definitely planning something and I just cannot fucking tell what—I don't know if it's because I've missed something/am reading too much into it due to how slowly I've been taking this chapter or if it's just that the dude has vibes more rancid than StarscreamOutis (I will eat my nonexistent hat if she doesn't traitor Dante ok), it's very engaging and I'm enjoying it a great deal.

(I am curious about what the deal is with the woman who stabbed Yi Sang, but I'm certain we'll see more of her, given she has a portrait.)