#which brings her number of titles up from eleven to an even dozen

[project-catgirlpillar]

Average a practical Guide to evil character has three titles actually Just a statistical Error. Titles Catherine who lives in a Cave and has had three Names, two callowan/Praesi noble titles, two fae Mantels, three drow titles and one epithet is an outlier and should Not have been counted

[catelyngrant]

My Year in Fic: 2023

I had a fun and kind of wild year in fic-writing this year, diving back into four (!) fandoms I haven't written for in over a decade but that all consumed me for years on end once upon a time. There was also a great deal of Succession, shocking no one. I was going to reblog this as a "send numbers" post, but I actually wanted to revisit this year in fic so I answered them all anyway below the cut.

what have i become, my sweetest friend? 24, Jack Bauer & Nina Myers (~2k, T)

let your faith die, bring your wonder: Battlestar Galactica, Laura Roslin-centric (~5k, T)

what falls away is always: Doctor Who, Sarah Jane Smith & The Fourteenth Doctor (~2700, G)

not a single word was said: Star Trek: Picard, Beverly Crusher/Jean-Luc Picard (~1700, G)

the blood sacrifice: Succession, Ensemble (~1k, T, Crack)

if there’s a rocket tie me to it: Succession, Gerri Kellman/Roman Roy (~2700, T)

the name we’ve long held back: Succession, Gerri Kellman/Roman Roy (~4400, T)

not broken, just bent: Succession, Gerri Kellman/Roman Roy (~4k, M)

something is always between us: Succession, Gerri Kellman/Roman Roy (~2k, T)

we even flew a little: Succession, Gerri Kellman/Roman Roy (~4000, T)

years from now, i’ll cry to remember: Succession, Shiv Roy & Gerri Kellman (~1400, T)

Thoughts below!

How many words have you written this year? 30,695, which is quite a lot for me! How many works did you publish this year? Eleven (plus a playlist).

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)? There are a few! Digging into BSG and Laura Roslin after so much time was really intimidating and overwhelming, but it was so interesting to explore sides of her that land so differently all these years later, and I was really proud of how let your faith die, bring your wonder turned out given how much I angsted over it. Beyond that, I wrote a lot of Succession fic this year, which was intimidating in different ways. I had a really clear vision for the name we’ve long held back and I was really gratified that it felt like I brought that into focus and that it was received well. I also really liked digging just a little into Gerri and Shiv in years from now, i’ll cry to remember, just because I find their relationship fascinating and underexplored.

What work of yours has the most hits? the name we’ve long held back

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? not a single word was said had a really satisfying response for a fic in a fandom I’ve written very little in and that ended up being jossed very shortly after it was written. I really liked this one, though, and felt really good about the emotional beats, so it was great to see that received well. I also was surprised that years from now, i’ll cry to remember got the love that it did—gen fics rarely perform as well as shippy ones, but this held its own.

Favorite title you used: It’s got to be not broken, just bent (aka the one where Roman breaks his penis).

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most? Vienna Teng, as always! (let your faith die, bring your wonder; years from now, i’ll cry to remember; the name we’ve long held back)

Pairing you wrote the most for this year? Roman/Gerri

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year? Roman/Gerri definitely took up most of my year, but Picard/Crusher also consumed me a great deal even if that wasn’t reflected in what I ended up writing.

What work was the quickest to write? the blood sacrifice. The inherent absurdity of crack fics tend to allow me to give fewer fucks, which is fun.

What work took you the longest to write? I started both what have i become, my sweetest friend and we even flew a little well before the start of 2023 and then let them sit for many months before returning to finish them. what have i become, my sweetest friend takes the cake, though—I think I started that 2+ years before posting.

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year? Dozens, but only 3-4 that I’m optimistic about finishing.

What’s your longest work of the year? let your faith die, bring your wonder

What’s your shortest work of the year? the blood sacrifice

What WIP are you taking into next year with you? Nothing currently live, but my two remaining Supergirl WIPs will be finished eventually, and then I have a couple of DW threads dangling.

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag? AU - Canon Divergence (that tracks!). if there’s a rocket, tie me to it was one that didn’t get a lot of love comparatively but that I really enjoyed writing; it explored the various ripple effects of how the series may have played out if the rocket launch had gone off without a hitch in 1x10. I love identifying small moments like that that, had they played out differently, can create an entire AU. 

Your favorite character to write this year? Gerri, probably. She’s complicated and scary and in some ways a blank slate and in other ways tremendously specific, and I feel like I dug into a lot of different sides of her. She’s also the character that I wrote the most this year, which makes sense. 

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? Picard/Crusher. As much as I adored ST:P, it fucked with my characterization and I started many, many more fics featuring them (separately or together) than I completed.

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? I feel like I’ll be living in Doctor Who-land for a little while longer, so maybe I’ll finally get to exploring my extensive headcanons around Sarah Jane and Twelve! 

Which work of yours have you reread the most? the name we’ve long held back, probably, just because I posted it early in the year.

How many kudos in total did you get this year? 1,199

Which work has the most comments? the blood sacrifice and not a single word was said. I'm inconsistent in replying to comments, though, so I think my responses on those skew them.

Did you do any collaborative works this year? With the BSG Minibang, yes! There’s a podfic of let your faith die, bring your wonder.

Did you write any gifts this year? not broken, just bent and the name we’ve long held back, both for Jerk Matron January.

Did you receive any gifts this year? Yes! Vast_difference wrote when I'm broken down and I can't stand (would you be man enough to be my man) for Jerk Matron January—highly recommend!

What’s your most common category? F/M

What do you listen to while writing? I don’t listen to anything, usually. I prefer silence.

Favorite work you wrote this year? This is hard, honestly, because I wrote more than usual and also wrote in a lot of different fandoms, including several that I wrote a lot for and/or was heavily involved in many, many years ago. The nostalgia factor was very real this year! Beyond the works that I’m proudest of listed in #3, I’m most recently enamored by what falls away is always—for all of my love of the Doctor and Sarah Jane, this is really the first time I’ve written just the two of them together, and I didn’t think that there would be new material to explore between them at this stage! It was really fun. I also have a soft spot for we even flew a little, which I started in early 2022 and found myself too intimidated to continue but managed to complete before season four started and rendered it obsolete. Finally, I didn't include this originally but in looking at favorite lines/passages from this year, I originally had four from not a single word was said, so maybe that should get a little more love!

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year? This is always very hard. I generally have been happy with a lot of the dialogue I've written this year, which is notable because there's such a range of distinctive voices. Roman's voice in particular was a beast, but coming up with things like this (from the blood sacrifice)—

“It’s about fucking time,” Roman grumps, the irritation in his words belied by the way his face collapses into relief. He straightens up, resting his elbows on his knees. “Shit-fucking-Jesus, after Gerri comfort-fucks me into oblivion and I sober up—” Gerri elbows him, hard, but seems distracted by the shape in the distance even as he rattles on— “I’m going to destroy every last one of these blubbery blimps. I’m gonna buy a beach house and wallpaper it with their skin, I’m gonna, fucking, start a whale-burger chain and bankrupt the animal-fucker groups and—”

—well, it's just fun.

In terms of opening lines, I quite liked this from let your faith die, bring your wonder:

There was a time when stars were a wonder and rain had just been rain.

And for closing lines...

There’s not much space between them, a couple dozen feet, but somehow Gerri seems glazed, blurred around the edges. Shiv can’t read her expression before she’s turned back to the railing and lifted the cigarette back to her lips, her gaze once again fixed firmly in the other direction as she says, softly, “I’ll see you, Shiv.” Shiv doubts it. Her father’s dead, and her stomach is swelling; no one will be looking at her again.

Character-wise, I liked this bit in Gerri's POV from we even flew a little:

If. It’s as close as she’s come to admitting to either of them that it wasn’t just her career on the line—that his messy, reckless heart isn’t the only one aching, here at the end of this. Because he’d done more than want her, had seen more in her than her competence (and wasn’t that a giddy thing, in and of itself, to be seen). He’d found, somehow, the little seed of insanity that’s kept her at Waystar all these years—the masochistic desire to control the uncontrollable, to beat the unbeatable, to smooth thin veneers over rotten ground and get away with it because she alone knows where it’s safe to step. He dug it up and brought it to bloom and it felt good, to pour her poison into him. 

And in terms of pain levels, I really loved this Picard/Crusher moment from not a single word was said. The show itself took a different take on what tore them apart, but I felt like this perspective could have made a lot of sense as well:

He’s given her everything he’s ever had to offer, given her patience and space and the sort of trust that feels foreign to him now. He gave her comfort when she needed it and silence when he wanted to speak; he bottled up his own useless love into something so small and stunted that it hurt just to offer, and he offered it nonetheless. It was always hers for the taking. She even reached for it, once.

Biggest surprise while writing this year? Oh god, honestly, I’ve just felt like a teenager again. Writing and posting fic for 24, BSG, Star Trek: TNG, and Doctor Who? It’s been wild.

[dimigex]

Healing Hands - Chapter Nine - YamaSaku

Now available on Fanfiction and Archive.

Good news: there's two sections of Tenzo and Sakura interaction in this one, and we're going to get significantly more in the coming chapters.

Snippet below the cut, but this chapter is over 11K words so it's probably better to read it on one of the other sites.

After dropping an armful of files across her desk, Sakura slumped into her chair. The lamp spread a halo of pale light across the papers that had begun to resemble precarious mountains with styrofoam cup trees at the bases. Despite working three hours past the end of her shift, Sakura still needed to spend several more to complete her charting. It had taken a month in her new position to realize that she needed one day each week devoted to paperwork.

Despite that, Sakura's efforts didn't seem enough. She had to update her patient's charts like she'd done before, but now, she also had to oversee a variety of administrative tasks that ended up on her desk. There were budget reports to review, staff schedules to create, training programs to consider, and any number of things that she'd never had to worry about in the past. Since talking to Kakashi about finding an assistant, Sakura couldn't help but wonder if she should do the same. Kazuko was a natural with the administrative side, but she would need someone with an aptitude for medical ninjutsu to fill her position eventually.

The scrape of fabric drew Sakura's attention from her self-pitying thoughts. Though she no longer wore the jonin uniform beneath her lab coat, a weapon pouch circled her thigh. Some habits remained in peace or war. She pulled a kunai from the leather holster and spun her chair, ready to release the weapon at the first sign of danger. A form materialized from a dark corner of the room, grey eyes smiling. "They never warn you about the paperwork, do they?"

Recognizing Kakashi, Sakura lowered the kunai and tucked it away. The man lounged on the arm of the couch, long legs stretched in front of him like he'd been waiting for a while. The robes and hat were nowhere to be seen, but Sakura envisioned the weight dragging at his shoulders. Besides, the new jonin uniform was different enough from Sakura's version of Kakashi that it had become a sign of his office anyway. She bowed her head in greeting. "What can I do for you, Hokage-sama?"

Kakashi snorted and pushed to his feet. "Drop the title, firstly."

As Kakashi moved closer to her desk, Sakura humored him with a smile that strained at her patience. She'd been working for fourteen hours today, and while she liked Kakashi well enough, Sakura wanted to know what new chaos he was bringing into her life. There was no way that Kakashi was making a social visit at this time of night, so he needed something. He eyed the stacks of paper, nearly knocking one over when he got too close. Sakura batted the hands away from her work. "Is there something I can help you with?"

"Your desk doesn't look much different from mine." Kakashi's eyes conveyed a deeper sense of amusement. Sakura realized that she could read the man's emotions much better without the sharingan or headband that slanted across his face. Something about the comparison and teasing tone drew a flush of annoyance onto Sakura's cheeks.

Taking a deep breath, Sakura reined her temper under control. She and Kakashi were friends and former teammates, which offered her some leniency, but he was still the hokage. "I'm sorry," she said, further moderating her tone. "What I meant to say is that I'm terribly busy and—"

"And, you don't have time to enjoy my company," Kakashi finished Sakura's argument before she could articulate the sentiment more gently. The man's lips twitched into a smile beneath his mask when he held up a hand to stop her rebuttal. "I understand, I really do. But, I need a favor."

"A favor," Sakura repeated, grimacing at the aftertaste that the word left in her mouth. She had more than enough work piled on her desk without accepting more, especially not knowing what she was getting into. But, she wasn't sure if this was the type of task that she could refuse. "What kind of favor?"

Kakashi rubbed the back of his neck and offered an apology with his eyes. "The kind that takes up more of your time, unfortunately."

Sakura groaned before she could stop herself. Of course it was time consuming. But, she couldn't tell Kakashi no, even if she wanted to. He crossed the office, producing a stack of files from somewhere that she couldn't see. There couldn't have been more than twenty, slim folders, but they hit Sakura's desk like stone. Kakashi rested his fingertips on top of them. "These are the files on my current Anbu."

A quip died on the tip of Sakura's tongue as she reached for the top cover, frowning. "I thought there would be more of them. And, shouldn't they say top secret or something? These look like every other shinobi file that crosses my desk."

"That's the point," Kakashi teased, drawing his hand back and crossing his arms over his chest. "Can you think of anything that would make them more likely to be read than putting a warning across the front? This way, they hide in plain sight."

Nodding along with the logic, Sakura pulled the first file from the stack and flipped it open. A painfully young shinobi stared back at her. She didn't recognize him; the boy could have been anyone. Sakura did a double take when she skimmed the medical information and saw that he was six years older than her. Her gaze shifted back to Kakashi. "What am I supposed to do with these?"

Kakashi stared down at the photo for a moment, then sighed. "I've been thinking about the concerns you raised with Yamato, and you were right. We aren't at war any longer; I need to know that my Anbu are sound, physically and mentally."

"Did you check on him?" Sakura had nearly gone to Kakashi half a dozen different times to ask, but she'd forced herself to trust him. If he said that he would take care of the situation with Yamato, he would. But, she had a difficult time holding back.

Kakashi remained silent as Sakura closed the file and replaced it on the stack. Then, his chin dipped in a sharp nod. Sakura let the silence drag out until Kakashi continued, answering her unasked question. "The mission clearly affected him, but I think he's bouncing back."

A knot of tension released in Sakura's chest. When Tsunade left the village, she'd given Sakura a copy of Kakashi's file in case she ever needed it. Sakura had left it unopened for weeks, not wanting to pry into the man's past without reason. But, after the questions about Yamato, Sakura had thumbed through the document to get an idea of how well the two men knew each other. The history that leapt to life from the pages shocked her.

Not only had Yamato and Kakashi known each other during their Anbu days, they'd served on the same team. They had completed countless missions together over the years. As curious as she was, Sakura forced herself not to read the notes. Knowing the basics of their history was enough to soothe some of Sakura's worries. Kakashi knew Yamato far better than she did. If he thought that Yamato was okay, he probably was.

Kakashi nodded toward files, breaking Sakura's train of thought. "Tsunade had been taking care of the physicals, and the evaluations hadn't seemed that important until the other day."

They hadn't seemed that important until you suggested that one of my friends was struggling. Sakura heard the words that Kakashi wasn't ready to admit, even if he didn't. She framed her next question with care, half afraid of the anwer. "Does your visit exempt Yamato from this round of physicals?"

Sakura knew that Kakashi wanted to pretend that Yamato couldn't possibly be struggling, but her questions had planted the doubts too deeply. He shook his head after a few seconds of consideration. "No, as head of Anbu, Yamato needs to be evaluated as well."

Sakura tried to keep her mouth from falling open at the revelation, but the beginnings of a surprised gasp slid between her lips. Kakashi snorted under his breath. "Have you even looked at his file? I assumed that you'd scoured every detail before you came to me with questions."

"I didn't realize I could," Sakura began, then stopped short. On a subconscious level she'd known that she could get the file if she wanted it, but it wasn't easy to reach. When Sakura had agreed to take over medical oversight for Anbu, she'd been granted access to the files. But, she hadn't thought to make use of them. Something about using Yamato's past that way felt like an invasion of privacy. She didn't want to do that until she had a solid reason.

Nudging the files over so that they spread across the desk like a fan, Kakashi fished through them and came up with one that appeared identical to the others. When he flipped it open, Sakura studied Yamato's almost familiar features in the picture. It must have been recent, there were lines at the edges of his eyes and mouth that she didn't remember from when they'd first met. Still, it looked healthier than the man that she'd recently signed off to return to active duty.

Ignoring the sense of guilt that gnawed at her stomach, Sakura frowned at Kakashi. "What am I looking for?"

Long fingers slid across the page, coming to rest just above the years of service. Sakura's mouth dropped as she frowned at the number. "That can't be right," she argued, doing some quick backward math. "He would have had to join Anbu when he was ten; nobody joins that young."

"Eleven, actually," Kakashi corrected. He shrugged his shoulders in a nonchalant manner that suggested that he cared more than he wanted to admit. "What makes you an expert on Anbu ages, anyway? I was only thirteen when I joined; you were barely a genin by then."

At thirteen, Sakura had been afraid to work out too hard lest she get bulky muscles that Sasuke wouldn't like. Her crush had determined every aspect of her life, consuming it. The idea of living through the things that she'd learned about Anbu during the past few weeks while at that age was horrifying.

Unbidden, Sakura studied Kakashi. She couldn't help but wonder how different he must have been to survive Anbu. Her heart ached for the innocence that he and Yamato had surely given up to be in the black ops so young. Had they ever had a normal life, even by shinobi standards? Had they left genin teams behind? Had they lost their friends and first crushes in the process? She didn't want to think about it. "You were just kids."

"We were shinobi in a time of war," Kakashi countered with a shrug. A dusting of pink showed above the edges of his mask, but Sakura wasn't sure if it was annoyance or embarrassment that colored his cheeks. Kakashi closed Yamato's file. "I wasn't looking for pity, for either of us. I just want you to know that Yamato has been doing this long enough to live through some dark days. He knows how to handle it."

Sakura nodded, but she couldn't help but wonder if living through more trauma made a person better at hiding their struggles than dealing with them. She wondered what darkness Kakashi's easygoing nature hid. Deciding that she'd rather not know until she needed to, Sakura pushed the files back into a stack. "I'll clear my schedule to get these done. You'll have the results by the end of next week."

Kakashi eye smiled, tension flowing out of his posture at the easy acceptance. "Thank you. I wish it wasn't more work on top of what you already have."

"Some things are important enough to take precedence," Sakura answered, waving away Kakashi's apology. This would give her a chance to dig deeper into Yamato's mental state as well as familiarize herself with the other Anbu. If she could save even one of them, it was worth however much time it took.

(Find the rest on FF and A03, linked above)

[thegooddoctorsthoughts]

Broken Immortals: The Face Of Tyrant

After humanity’s dramatic entrance to the galactic stage, wars were waged against those who desperately clung to corrupted power and a new council needed to be installed. It was during these wars that relics of some of the ancestor races were rediscovered and among them was something that apparently had been lost for hundreds perhaps thousands of SGC (Standard Galactic Cycles), at the edge of Scutum-Centarus Aquila the floating remnants of a horrifying battlefield. In its midst a derelict ship almost a billion years old, a titanic machine of unimaginable proportions which no record from any species could place. It was locked tight and took several cycles for progress to be made to get inside, it was originally thought to be a flagship of sorts, others thought it to be some kind of titan class weaponry which was designed to crack systems rather than planets, both assumptions proved to be half true. It was a colony ship and war machine all in one, there were automated mutations factories and billions of some sort of stasis tube throughout the ship.

This planetary sized starship was classified as The Monolith by its founder, the mercenary flotilla Obair Clog. The outfit was headed by an individual known as Tyrant, the species of this individual remained unknown however they had been operating for roughly four thousand cycles so many assumed that the title was handed down from one individual to another. However numerous individuals who had worked with the outfit over its history had claimed that it was one person who has held the title all this time. Few species could live such a long time and by the descriptions given by those who had interacted with Tyrant, it was none of them, not the At-Lai and their mothlike appearance or the Plantoid Balmoreheans or a Prethorian hive lord, but rather a Human. This idea of an over ten-thousand-year-old human has been dismissed even by the leaders of the UNE, as they were forced to comment on the matter after Obair Clog raided several systems in At-Lai space during their fifteen-cycle integration into the Federation. No species medical technology had allowed human beings to live that long quite yet, and those who had gotten close were largely feeble and senile while Tyrant was described as fit and healthy with the body of a nine sweep or twenty-five-year-old human being of indeterminate sex or gender. The mystery of who Tyrant really was the subject of much drunken debate and idle conversation among Federation troops on guard duty, they were; as Lord Admiral Bain of UNE Federation Fleet Solar put it “A mystery wrapped in an enigma wearing a pair of sunglasses”. An enigmatic figure who appeared to be human that had been active on the galactic stage longer than humanity itself. 

When The Monolith was discovered it remained in Obair Clog hands for a full cycle to the day unbeknownst to the Federation, however eventually it was turned over to the Federation by none other than Tyrant and the universe finally got part of an answer as to who Tyrant really was and next to nobody saw it coming. The exchange began with the entire flotilla jumping into a system which officially was uninhabitable but had a Federation Black Site orbiting TrES-4 and contacted said Black Site.

“This is Flag Ship Shattered Symphony from the Mercenary Flotilla Obair Clog contacting Federation Black Site Aquila Balsa Four. I am Tyrant and wish to speak to whoever oversees this operation.” There was roughly an hour of radio silence between the shielded cloaked satellite and the Flotilla before another message was sent. “If you do not respond then I shall personally board your station and talk to whoever operates your communications myself.” Several minutes later a response was sent out from the Black Site. “Admiral Tyrant, this site is under the protection of Federation High Command, we do not exist under any star map or naval Documentation, would you kindly explain how you discovered us?” There was no delay in a reply, a feed was opened, and a massive amount of data was being transmitted to the communication system. The commander demanded the data stream be severed immediately when Tyrants next message came through. “You will find some of the information which myself and my teams were able to discover about a floating derelict ship nearly the size of the Gas Giant you are orbiting. We have spent a whole cycle attempting to crack into the machine without much luck, we would offer all our data and the location of this machine to Federation high command in exchange for a place on the research team and several other terms which I shall put forward to High Command. I suggest you transmit my prior messages as well as the data I have sent to you to High Command and have them review it.” As the commander of the Black Site reviewed some of the data and prepared a response the entire flotilla warped out of system and left behind a single Corvette-class ship, which remained in system until contact was made elsewhere by Federation High Command and Tyrant. Halfway across federation-controlled space Tyrant received an unencrypted communication from within Federation high command and a matter of seconds after they were connected the Corvette vanished.

The call between Federation High Command and Tyrant was no secret and everyone in both systems could hear everything. In a matter of minutes what was a discussion between one of the most enigmatic and feared individuals in the known galaxy and the most senior members of the Galactic federation became a public event with uncountable trillions tuning in to the unencrypted feed. High Command were in their usual positions, seated around the holoprojector looking toward the center where the glitchy, static mess that represented Tyrant appeared. “High Command, I have come to report the existence of a derelict Ancestor-ship” The human ambassador spoke first, the first of her kind to speak on the Galactic Stage, Seras Titania Ainsworth “We are aware, we have gone through all of the data you have provided us. We agree to your terms under a singular condition. We wish to know who exactly it is we are dealing with.” There was a long period of silence between both sides and in the few minutes it had taken for the two to send their messages half of Federation Space tuned in to see the possible reveal of the Legendary Tyrant. The universe watched on as a legend made themselves known, Tyrant’s form shifted, and a humanoid form took its place, a shifting mess of undefined facial and body features however unmistakably humanoid. High Command waited for several minutes as appeared Tyrant to deliberate as to make the deal or not, but the form never settled and High Command grew impatient.

“Tyrant you can reveal yourself to the high command alone and your identity remain protected, but we must know.” Xeyrc the At-Lai spoke out but was only met with silence. The Shattered Symphony and the remainder of the Flotilla warped into the home system of Federation High Command and the flagship docked with the Space Station Fallen Eden. A message was sent out across all frequencies. “High Command you are welcomed aboard The Shattered Symphony, you are welcome to bring as many guards as you feel is necessary, but you will meet me alone.” and with that Tyrant disappeared and four members of high command volunteered to board the mercenary vessel and risk their capture. They each brought with them a number of bodyguards and had numerous Destroyer class ships, as well as the defence of the station, leveled on the mercenary flagship. A mob of journalists crowded the entrance to the docking bay in the hope to get a glance of Tyrant or find some scrap of information that might jumpstart their career. However, everyone but the council was kept outside of the bay the crew of the Shattered Symphony, who either stood guard, went about their jobs of maintaining the ship or talked with the few dock workers who were deemed trustworthy and remained in the bay.

The four members of High Command consisted of, the usual suspect Seras Titania Ainsworth, a human a brash and terrifying species who originated from a class four Death World, the first human to speak on the galactic stage and now an old woman feared and respected by everyone within the Federation. Xeyrc an At-Lain, a humanoid moth like species, they were a former Federation Captain and War Hero who had had a run in with Tyrant before and followed any news surrounding them with great attention. Doh’Ral a Prethorian Hive-Lord, an insectoid race, who had been a master economist and whose actions had saved uncounted systems during an interstellar outbreak of a hyper-contagious Virophage which had mutated and directly attacked the nervous system and killed in hours. Finally, there was The Emissary, one of the only Machine Races left after the events of The Grey Death wiped out untold trillions several hundred cycles ago. One of the droids used by the superintelligence a variation of the normal chassis used by The Emissary, lighter and smaller, a simple Octagonal Prism with a small grav-jet on the bottom plate in the place of the usual mechanical tendrils it usually uses for locomotion.

Each council member was accompanied by a squad of guards of their choice, Seras taking her personal retinue of twelve guards, Xeyrc by four of their former naval comrades, Doh’Ral by eleven greater Hive Guards and The Emissary by a squad advanced assault drones numbering thirty-two. They all pushed their way through the media onslaught and into the Docking Bay and were told to wait for Sergeant-At-Arms Azel to escort them to Tyrant. During their wait Seras and Xeyrc made a rather interesting observation. The Crew of the Shattered Symphony was made up of dozens of species, while it was common for ships to have numerous species normally it was perhaps half a dozen on larger ships, a dozen on a titan class ship at a push, in the docking bay alone there were easily forty species. However, what was more interesting was that every one of them had some form of prosthetic or disfigurement, having an engineer or assault trooper with an augmetic limb or eye was a normal enough sight however every member of the crew here had augmetics and Xeyrc saw a cook had one of his legs and half his right arm replaced with augmetics. The Emissary noted that documentation of prior members of the crew all had similar appearances and either did not speak of the reasoning why or claimed that they were disabled before joining the crew and purchased the augmetic with the generous wages afforded to the crew. An uncomfortable silence sat between the dignitaries as they pondered the implications of a fully augmetic crew.

Azel finally arrived, an At-Lain with all their wings replaced with augmetics and somehow more strangely a human name, they did not speak and simply beckoned the party to follow them. As they made their way through the ship they took in the gothic architecture of many of the halls, this ship was of no design or classification that the Federation had on file, it was a labyrinthine monolith, each and every inch of it a masterpiece of both engineering and artistry. Light of all colors poured in from massive stained glass windows and gave the entire place an aura of regality. The interior of the ship was unimaginably luxurious; standing in harsh contrast to the jagged edges and black void of the ship exterior built with a clear intent of function over form. Seras commented that this was the architecture of parts of her home planet, that this entire place reminded her of the Sistine Chapel or Rotterdam Cathedral and proceeded to briefly explain these places significance to her companions. Azel explained that Tyrant had modeled this portion of the ship after Rotterdam Cathedral and that about four cycles ago Tyrant had brought some of the crew there to experience its majesty and how they had personally loved Hunyad castle. Seras asked why Tyrant had chosen aspects of Earth’s culture to model the ship and Azel explain that while the interior macrostructure of the ship is inspired by Earth’s Gothic architecture many other aspects of the ship are modeled after different artistic styles of other species and their cultures. They stopped by a massive stain glass window for a moment and Doh’Ral was a little taken aback once they actually paid attention to the piece in detail, it was a Prethorian Temporachasm a style of artwork which Prethorians commonly used to convey the struggle each Prethorian feels between their own memories and personalities and the impressions of their ancestors and other living Prethorians within their hives as they struggle between individuality and the will of the many. The lower four plates of Doh’Ral’s exoskeleton vibrated at a low hum and somewhere in the distance, a similar humming was heard as another Prethorian responded to them. Azel placed one of their hands on the back Doh’Ral’s thorax “He has collected and curated thousands of pieces of art from every civilization and brought together thousands of individuals in the name one united Universe. One of the starboard gunnery decks had its microstructure fashioned in the style of Hive Mechanicus in the Nageera system.” Doh’Ral was impressed by the At-Lians knowledge “Do you know who created this piece?” “Unfortunately not, there is a terminal nearby which would have the answer allow me a moment.”

Throughout the halls, the unmistakable sound of Tyrants perfectly neutral and undefinable voice resonated “Azel we can show our guests the artwork later we have business to attend to.'' There was a soft click as though the receiver was right next to each member of the party and they all knew that there was something very wrong with this ship and most likely the entire flotilla. The group set off and chatted amongst themselves as they made their way up elevators, down hallways and through the labyrinth of a ship. Eventually, they reached a door, unlike all the others, while the others were simply stylised airlocks and blast doors, these were gargantuan. Carved from two massive slabs of white marble with two massive trees growing up either one of the doors. No mortal could open these doors and there was no sign of any mechanism to open them remotely, these massive works of intricate artistry stood between High Command and Tyrant.

There was a moment of silence and the doors began to move, slowly but surely, and from the other side, pushing them open was an unaugmented humanoid, when the doors stopped and enough room was made for the figure to walk through them they looked up and despite none of them having seen their face before they knew this was Tyrant, perfectly androgynous and yet of no species any present could identify. “Your guards stay here, but you are welcome to come in.” The members of High Command stood their guards down and followed Tyrant into the cathedral like sanctum beyond the two towering edifices. A slow and torturous groan wrattled through the bodies of High Command as by unknown and unseen methods the two towering doors were dragged shut.

Behind these doors stood a similar hallway to the last however here wires openly hung from the walls, ceiling, and pillars, drones could be seen going to work and the bright stained glass gave way to dimmer tinted black glass. “You are being entrusted with my identity however before we continue do you have any questions?” There was hesitation among the group, but eventually The Emissary Spoke: “Why are all of your crew outfitted with augmetics?”. Tyrants waved their hand “You will understand that in due time, but to give half of an answer. It is because each of them drew the short straw and once upon a time so did I, now we are united in our ability to transcend our own weaknesses, we turned them into strengths. Anything else?” Xeyrc asked if Tyrant remembered them “We fought side by side on Sapio, that Fortress World would have been the death of billions if your fleet had not intervened when it did. You’re a hero, there is a place on my crew should you ever retire from Politics” Tyrant asked once again if there were any more questions and there were none. “Now we shall convene in my quarters and discuss matters” before anyone could respond Tyrant turned on their heel and walked deeper into the shadowy hallway. They reached an elevator in a dark corner of the corridor, it was different from the others, a grey little box without any artwork, engraving or any gravitas, it was cold, dead, and sterile. After several more minutes of traveling through similarly sterile hallways, they reached a door and Tyrant opened the door into what appeared to be a server room and led the way inside.

After they all entered Tyrant disappeared in a flash of disjointed voxels and left them alone in the rather odd server room. Instantly paranoia set and demands as to where Tyrant had gone were made and accusations of a trap leveled, however quickly the reality of the situation set in. “I am right here, and this is no trap, this is what I truly am” concealed weapons were drawn, high frequency shield generators sprang to life and silence reigned between the delegates. They stood in a room where the walls were entirely obscured by row after row of wiring, towers of server blocks obscured much of their vision and the door had closed behind them, leaving them to bathe the dim red lights of the room. Xeyrc moved to the center of the room where Tyrant had been standing and demanded that they were released. “The door will open in a few moments, it is on a time delay due to a problem with its shoddy installation, it was one of the first things I built when I came here”. Xeyrc looked down and saw that they were standing above what appeared to be a whole humanoid nervous system floating in a pane of clear liquid. “Yes, Xeyrc you are correct that is me.” Tyrants voice felt closer now and four hard-light chairs appeared in a circle around the center of the room. “Please sit, and I shall tell my story. My name is Tyrant, the transcendent one. I had a name once, however, you will have to forgive me the millennia has stripped it from me.” Xeyrc’s shield quickly wound down and they sat into the chair without hesitation followed quickly by The Emissary’s drone which moved to the chair and unfolded into a spindly humanoid shape. Seras and Doh-Ral slowly moved toward the centre of the room and took their places alongside the other members of the council with hesitation. Their weapons still on hand, nobody truly trusted Tyrant after their vanishing act.

The pane raised from the ground, and the mechanisms which Tyrant used to interface with the ship was clear to see, each and every individual nerve ending connected to what appeared to be exterior systems via synthetic nerve endings and artificial synaptic nodes, effectively extending the nervous system out of the fluid and likely across the rest of the ship. Xeyrc moved to speak however before their question could leave their mouth Tyrant cut them off. “I belong to the ancestors of all life, long before any of your ancestors walked among the stars. However I do not think that I am strictly an ancestor to anyone anymore, I am somewhere between Seras and The Emissary, a species of one and many, individuals and yet one whole.” There was a moment of silence, none of them how to interact with a being like this, the council were used to dealing with machine races and their cold hard logic as well as those who rejected augmentation in the pursuit of preserving their own essence, however here was someone very who seemed to have taken the augmentation of their biology to an extreme which put them in the same nature of operations as The Emissary however clearly still remained singular and personable unlike the hiveminds or machine races. The Emissary's drone extended its spindly arm and exposed a port on the hexagonal end. A floating Hard-light arm appeared suspended a few inches in front of the outstretched arm and began to interface with it. There was silence for a few seconds as the Ancient Caretaker and First Child of The Stars spoke in a language that only beings such as themselves could understand.

The two separated from each other and The Emissary Spoke “Tyrant is older than any records presently accessible to this unit. Binary stranding, Format Dating and Quantum Decay Readings are all Inconclusive. Tyrant predates the Caretaker-Protocol. Protocol dictates minimal cataloging of Tyrant for the Caretaker-Database. The Identity of Tyrant must remain a secret for the continued preservation of Emissary Continuity.” The other three delegates looked on in horror as the machine race which had been obsessed with cataloging everything finally found something it had no interest in, or rather demanded remained hidden. “You likely have questions, I likely do not have the answers for you. Much of my memory has either decayed or I have stashed in one of my numerous repositories knowing it would decay. That however is irrelevant as of this time, you now know who and what I am and I would request that you comply with your end of our deal.”

Seras spoke first “Did you seed life on the worlds we developed from?”. There came on odd sound, like a sigh, but distorted and warped. “Not quite, both yes and no, I have visited your worlds long before any of you existed. I know that much. Or rather I know those of my kind did. I am the last left I would think. We did not create you if that is what you are asking. We do however share some...relations of a kind. Our genetics are not similar however much like The Emissary documents and protects life, we....helped pushed the Boat out as you humans say. I do not remember what happened or how it was achieved I only remember how cold and harsh this place once was and how wondrously full of life it is now. I think perhaps The Monolith may reveal some secrets of that past, of a time before even I walked among the stars.”

Doh’Ral seemed uneasy with this answer and quickly accused Tyrant “You’re older than even The Emissary, the caretaker of the known universe, did you build it? If not you, then who? It is the largest data repository the Federation has access to if it is in jeopardy then further sanctions must be enacted to ensure it is not corrupted or held to ransom.” “There is no need to fear, The Emissary was constructed by something already ancient when my people took their first steps into the stars. Something I cannot hope to understand, it passed through this place and then vanished back into the void as quickly as it arrived. The Emissary surfaced one day and we knew it was the creation of whatever it was that migrated through this place. We caught a glimpse of them, towering things, wondrous and horrifying, like the twisted offspring of nebula and the cores of neutron stars, some worshiped them as gods. I however saw no such grandeur to them, they were simply greater than any of us, the Emissary is simply another of their children, like me a race of one glorious and grotesque in its own way.”

The flickering hardlight figure appeared again, this time flickering between uncountable distinct individuals of various shapes, sizes and species, occasionally some of them looked familiar, after a few seconds of this it dawned on Seras and Xeyrc, the realisation rang out in their minds like a cast iron pan against a hollow aluminium tube, it was the crew. They locked eyes with each other and nodded. Xeyrc allowed their shock to get the better of them and spoke aloud out of reflex “You are the crew, all of them, a kind of collective consciousness, a hivemind.” There came a chuckle from the hard light figure. “Not quite, I am one, something old, ignorant of even my own history. Somewhere in orbit around a long distant star sits a data vault containing the nature of my origin. I am closer to a sentient operating system, not quite an artificial intelligence as I am biological in origin. I run this ship, and yet I am the ship. I help those in need with the creation of custom built augmetics tailored to their needs and yet at the same time am part of those augmetics. As The Emissary said, if you were to understand what exactly I was it would threaten life as you know it. Knowledge is power, however I must consign you all to ignorance on this particular topic. This is power none may wield.” Doh’Ral was having none of this “You stand as a threat to all life and to The Emissary’s database, I do not trust anyone to wield that kind of power. If you are such a great threat to us why risk us finding out? Why contact us in such a manner?” Tyrant gestured to the Emissary “If not me then allow your compatriot to explain”

“Tyrant is a non-threat, Continuity must be preserved, possible temporal distortions detected. Description Of Tyrant Entity: Naturally Emergent Intelligence Beyond Emissary Classification. Knowledge potential beyond Emissary computational ability. Function Unknown.  Uncataloged due to framework incompatibility. Tyrant Classification: Emissary Contender. Emissary System Directive: Preserve, Cooperate,, Evolve-Self, Return, Catalogue, Contend.” Tyrant turned to face Doh’Ral “I am no threat, I am simply other, on a level you cannot grasp. Alien even to each and every one of you. The nature of my intelligence means that what might be very literal and concrete to me in my thinking appears flowering, nebulous and esoteric to each of you, a limitation of language as an exchange of information.”

The hard light figure finally on the original angdrogenous humanoid form that greeted them, with a melancholic, defeated look on their face “I am the half remembered thought of a species which tamed the stars, battled ancient evils long forgotten even by me and left in their stead a universe ready and welcoming of life. I have no more answers for you than the Emissary. I am old, so old not even I remember what I am. The answers I have as to my nature are so far removed from the framework of your thinking I cannot hope to express who or what I am to you. So for now know this, I am an old and tired thing, yet I still have the youthful inquisitiveness that so many of your children share, for this universe has so many wonders to me. I go in search of knowledge and truly unimaginable things. Collecting interesting individuals along the way. Collecting Artistry and difference not only in the traditional way but in the forms of people as well. Those who think in wondrous ways, live in spite of reality saying otherwise, defy tradition and choose to live a life independent of any governing force. I collect artistry both material and mental, artistry as the lives of people and their works. I do not truly have the correct words to describe what I am. However this is all I have to offer you.” There was a sadness to their closing words, like they had so much more to say yet lacked the vocabulary to express it. The entire delegation could feel it, the vaguest impression of who it was they were, of the person beneath the wires and words, the crude instruments used to convey from one mind to another. There was a sadness to them, an incompleteness to their words. They felt how constrained Tyrant was, in search of words, feelings and methods of expression to convey what it was that they were, who they were. Tyrant had wandered the universe in search of artwork and individuals they could relate to, empathise with, outcasts and vagabonds, those who had been maimed and injured, those who felt outcast or incomplete in one capacity or another. As it all snapped into place a deep sadness gripped the three delegates capable of emotion.

“Are you satisfied or are there any other questions I might have half an answer for?” There was a loneliness to their words now, a frustration to their isolation of communication. They filed out of the core of the ship, thanking Tyrant for their time and promising their support in the excavation and exploration of The Monolith. They left with purpose, an understanding of an individual who has walked among these stars, seen the being born, live and many die. Whatever The Monolith was it had drawn the attention of one of the few Immortals in existence and that was more than convincing enough for High Command to lend their support.

It would not take long for the Federation and Obair Clog research teams to make headway into the archotech ship. However, little could prepare them for what they discovered...

“I’ve outlived two Federations and watched my homestar flicker out of existence, met many of the Immortals who wander this universe and peered beyond the vale. I have seen many great and terrible things, I however am no woman of faith. I believe everything in existence has a rational and logical explanation. Gods and Demons, Greater and lesser beings, afterlives and cycles of guilt, none of it means anything to me. I bend the knee to no deity. I however lack the verbiage to describe Tyrant as anything other than a Lonely God.” - from the memoirs of Seras Titania Ainsworth 

[isaiahsm]

eleven miles to your desire !     to say that isaiah was a little ticked would be an understatement. he and ashley were supposed to have a simple and very much needed date night— but the plans were foiled when he was informed that he had to pick something to talk about for the next beyond the grave episode. it was weird, for all the time that he had been doing this, not once had anyone ever left it up to him to pick where the team investigated. why would it start now? that was more on eli, julian and verena line of work. not his. he sends ash an apologetic text, asking her for a raincheck. she said yeah no problem because well, it’s ashley and she understands. after a few more texts, isaiah says goodbye and locks his phone, throwing it onto his bed and taking a seat by his desk. he powers on his laptop as he dreads the next few hours of ‘research’.

time flew by fast. the clock on his laptop read 8:03 PM when he started and now it’s 2:57 AM — and still, isaiah had nothing. hats off to all the researchers on the team because he literally had not found a single topic for this weeks episode. he’d gone on a google search frenzy, youtube, reddit, literally any cryptid site he could think of and nothing. it was... strange. you would think that there’d be thousands, if not millions of unsolved stories about ghosts or monsters on the internet but there wasn’t. something felt off. but isaiah doesn’t think much of it; instead he just opens another tab and continues his search.

it’s a miracle, really, when he types in creepy stories into the bar and the search engine pulls up one website with a story titled eleven miles posted by emerry from october 2013. without hesitation, isaiah goes to the website and begins his reading, unaware that he’s minutes away from falling asleep.

he wakes in a cold sweat, finding himself inside his car on a road that seems so unfamiliar but familiar at the same time. he looks around, finding it empty except for him and the vehicle he sits in. confused, isaiah gets out and walks around— calling out if anyone’s there only to get silence as a reply. he turns to return to his car when he finds a note on the windshield. it wasn’t there before.

what do you desire, isaiah maxwell? money? fame? think of what it is— and i mean really think of it. once said thing is clear in your mind. begin your journey.

now, if isaiah was in any normal circumstance— he would have just laughed it off as a prank being pulled by a member of the mysterybusters. but nothing of this seemed normal. as soon as he reads the note, the desire pops into his mind with no hesitation:

blair

he thinks of her and the things she left behind. her life that was cut so short by a man driven by vengeance. she deserved better. and even though the two didn’t have an extremely close relationship— he still cared for her. loved her. 

isaiah balls up the sheet of paper and tosses it aside, once more getting into his car and cranking it up, following the instructions of the note.

the first mile is beautiful, actually. billions of stars light up the night sky and it’s cold, sure, but it’s the cold that makes you feel comfortable. regardless, isaiah turns on the heat and continues the drive down the road— blair fresh on his mind as he’s ready to do whatever it takes to bring her back.

mile two is marked by a regular sign on the side of road. he’s surprised at how smoothly mile one went so he hopes two is the same. but it’s not. two minutes pass and the temperature drops dramatically. isaiah begins to shiver and turns up the heater in the car, hoping that it’ll help warn him up. on the bright side, he did grow up in seattle and the winters there are no joke. so he’s used to it. his thoughts distract him from seeing a sharp turn in the road ahead. he almost misses it— almost but he manages to turn the wheel at the perfect time to make it. that’s when he notices that the road is slightly bumpier, there’s potholes and pieces of it practically gone. hazard signs line the sides and he’s careful enough to drive through and around any that come his way.

it’s the third mile when he notices he isn’t alone. there’s someone... something on the side of the road following and watching him as he continues on the path. he can’t look, obviously, but he wants to— so bad. do it for blair, isaiah. he says to himself, eyes looking straight ahead and away from the silhouettes. the road suddenly turns into a dirt road and narrows so tightly; he’s not sure if the car is small enough to fit it. before he can worry any more, it widens again and his nerves are eased.

pass the third and now it’s the fourth mile. the figures soon disappear and isaiah is grateful. the curiosity was beginning to get to him. just when he thinks the silhouettes are a think of the past; he hears the whispers. at first he doesn’t understand— it’s just gibberish. he catches a few familiar phrases here and there but for the most part he ignores them.

the only thing on his mind right now is blair maxwell.

isaiah’s lucky number is five.  he’s never understood why exactly; but that number has always brought good things to him. so when mile five comes along and suddenly he’s in a clearing once more— he feels at calm. relaxed even. any other person would be losing their sanity or even worst: dead by now. but he isn’t. the lake looks beautiful glistening form underneath the bright moonlight ( which he catches a glimpse of with his peripheral vision ) . this scenery reminds him of the time he, his parents and blair went on a family camping trip when he was in middle school. back when times were easier and when he felt like he had a real family. isaiah would do anything to have more moments like that. the headlights of his car dim but he doesn’t mind, the moonlight was doing a great job of illuminating his way though mile number five. 

he’s reached the halfway ( more or so ) point of the trip— mile six. this is when things start getting intense. the road goes back to it’s normal setting and just like that isaiah feels the atmosphere change into something more uncomfortable and eerie. the radio cuts on and it feels like his ears are bleeding. at first, it’s a loud screech coming from the speakers in his car but then, then it goes to something worse.

a soothing voice.

who knew that hearing that would be worse than the constant loud of what sounded like nails on a chalkboard? isaiah struggles— and i mean really struggles with focusing on the drive ahead. the voice keeps repeating things that he’s never told anyone. nightmares and terrors that flood his mind whenever his eyes shut. after blair and daniel; he couldn’t sleep. it was bad. he took time off the team, didn’t go to his classes. isaiah was broken. but he was better now— thank god. he had friends and family who were around to give him that emotional support. 

but no, isaiah had come too far to be picked off like this. too close to having her back home. so he ignores the voice and speeds up a little, his mind immediately going to all the good memories he had of his half sister. small things, actually. like whenever she would tell him to turn his music down because it was garbage and distracting her from studying. or the meaningless talks they had after she returned from silverwood and how for the first time in so long he was finally able to have her open up to him.

isaiah misses blair.

the voice disappears and is replaced by another. expect it’s not really a voice but more like a distant scream. yeah, he’s made it to the seventh mile. he can handle it though— especially with the nightmare that was the sixth mile. except... except now the scream sounds like it’s right behind him. the thing. the figure from before is now inside his car. panic fills isaiah; what if it hurts him? don’t, isaiah. you’re so close. he hears another voice say and this one, oh this one he recognizes.

it’s blair.

that’s all he needs to block out the figure in the backseat. that’s all he needs to keep going.

i’m doing it for you, b.

he sees a sign coming up marking the eighth mile. a small laugh of victory emits from him. he’s almost there! the figure, uninterested, leaves him and now isaiah is alone once more on the journey to bring his sister back. there are turns, sharp ones, coming up and he slows down— patient enough to not wreck. if it wasn’t cold before, it is now. isaiah hasn’t really paid attention to it; already having enough distractions to keep his mind off of it but now, now it really hits him. there’s no use in turning up the heater because it’s busted and just when he thinks he has enough car problems, the headlights flicker before shutting off completely. living him in the dark. isaiah brakes and continues to trek very slowly, trying his best to avoid a car accident. but that’s when he feels them. the figures from before. they’re behind him, like really close. they begin to surround him but isaiah continues and speeds up a little, his headlights now flickering again; lighting his way to the ninth mile.

he’s made it to mile 9 and he’s so proud of himself. but that’s short lived when the vehicle stalls and the headlights are cut once more. no no no. isaiah says to himself, feeling the figures return. he shuts his eyes and goes to start the car again— now hearing the voices screaming, laughing, and talking within his mind. he hears more of them and from what he can tell; it’s dozens. dozens of those things trying to get him. isaiah hears a crack coming from the back and side of him— implying that they’re breaking into the car. his car. 

don’t let this distract you from your goal. he says out loud and with one last turn, he manages to start the car. with that, isaiah floors it. i mean, literally zooms off and leaves the figures behind. it’s funny how not even minutes ago, the road had sharp turns and breaks within it but now it’s smooth and going straight. he’s almost there.

things calm down just a little, because the road is still smooth and he’s no longer being chased by whatever those things were. he’s on mile ten. one more to go. one more before he gets to see her again. isaiah makes no mistake and looks straight ahead, avoiding the figures and the way they’re just standing there. as if watching him finish the game. i’m almost there, blair. almost there.

if things weren’t tense enough already, they were about to be. he’s on the final mile. before he can celebrate; the car stalls again like it did in mile nine. this time, eh can’t cut it back on and it’s still moving. which, makes no sense since it wasn’t even on. but he doesn’t say anything else, why would he? he didn’t want to mess up any of the progress he had done thus far.

cover your eyes, isaiah. don’t open them. just keep them closed. her voice rings in his ears and without hesitation— he does just that. using both hands; he places them over his closed eye lids and let’s the car guide itself.

the atmosphere changes and instead of being cold it’s hot. like so hot that isaiah begins to let out a loud screech as his body feels like it’s on fire. there’s sound coming from different directions which only adds to the suffering he’s going through now. hands ball up into fists on his face but he keeps his eyes shut harshly, not wanting to see the horror that he’d meet if he were to open them. he’s pretty sure it’s hell. the sounds coming from either direction of him sound like those souls being tormented for eternity. now, isaiah wasn’t religious but hearing this... going through all of this, well it just might lessen his skepticism.

he shouldn’t be doing this but he tries hard to listen for a voice that sounds like blair. what if he was doing all of this for nothing? and somehow his sister had been casted down to hell to suffer for ever? what if he gets her back but she’s not the same person she was before? isaiah get’s lost in these thoughts that he doesn’t notice that his 31 seconds through hell have ended and that power in the car is back on. the voices and heat have faded and he’s left a sobbing mess.he stops the vehicle, resting his forehead on the steering wheel as he tries... tries to recover from everything he’s been through.

isaiah maxwell has never felt pain like that before. ever.

after calming down, he sits up once more and continues the drive; thinking of how lucky he was to be alive.

he drives util he reaches a dead end. this prompts him to park and turn off the car, sitting there in silence as he awaits what’s next. after what he just went through— isaiah feels like he can take on the world. he knows what suffering is. 

he closes his eyes and begins to think of blair again. her strong personality, her laugh, all those moments he’s shared with her. how the team was going to be so happy to have her back. they needed this win and isaiah was more than happy to bring it to them. 

after thinking of her for a few more minutes, he opens his eyes and finds him on the road he started on. confused, he gets out of the car and looks around— disappointed and frankly, pissed off that she wasn’t here like he expected her to be. with tears in his eyes, isaiah shouts and screams loudly, kicking the side of his car in frustration. there’s no way... he’s been through too much to not have her here. too much.

what if he didn’t do something right? didn’t think of her enough before? wasn’t as ambitious to have her here like he thought.

fuck it.

he goes to get in the car again, to restart the entire thing. maybe the second time around she’d actually be here. he needed her to be. wiping the tears from his eyes, isaiah opens the car door to get in when he sees it.

not it. but her. she’s sitting in the passengers seat, typing away on her cellphone. as if everything was back to normal

“ well are you going to get in or what?”

abruptly, isaiah jumps up in his seat, looking around to find himself back in his room. what? eyes go to the clock on his laptop and he sees that it’s three in the morning. or as elijah would say, the devil’s hour.

he moves his fingers across the mouse on the laptop to see that he had fallen asleep while reading a story titled    ELEVEN MILES   . he reads the synopsis and lets out what sounds like a laugh and rubs his eyes. there’s this part of him, a large part actually, that’s heartbroken that whatever happened in his dream wasn’t real. blair wasn’t back; she’d never be and as much as he looked like he had moved on, isaiah hadn’t. he needed to.

[vskpop]

My 30 favourite songs of 2017

YouTube playlist ⋅ Spotify playlist

30. Don’t Recall – KARD

I’m upset with myself that last year I didn’t put Oh NaNa in my best of 2016 list because, reader, it was: it ended up as my second most played song of 2017. I didn’t listen to the follow-up Don’t Recall quite as much, but it was the song that cemented my love for KARD’s hip-hop/dancehall/pop jumble. Whoever is selecting their songs has such a flair for dance songs with a melancholy vibe, and Don’t Recall is unparalleled so far. It’s still too rare to get proper idol groups that are mixed gender, and it’s almost impossible for them to succeed. I’m so pleased that international success has been enough to keep KARD alive, even though their numbers are still abysmal at home. Live: M Countdown 17/07 – Yu Huiyeol's Sketchbook 30/08 Other songs of note: Rumor – Trust Me

  29. Heaven and Earth – Laboum

I went through a phase in which I found Laboum adorable, and then for some reason I stopped liking them as much (the reason is that ZN gets on my nerves, I’m sorry, I know). I still listened to their album Miss This Kiss for the nostalgia effect – and because lead single Hwi Hwi is damn good – and I just fell in love with 천지차이. As far as I can tell, it was never performed live, or at least not in venues where it was filmed. I hope that this kind of song keeps being given to them, and that eventually it becomes their lead single. They deserve to take a break from the cuteness. Other songs of note: Hwi Hwi

   28. Tomorrow, Today – JJ Project

I realise that I already said it when JJ Project made their comeback a few months ago, but Bounce is a modern classic in the trashiest way possible. The styling and sound that Jinyoung and JB went for in 2017 are completely different from their origins, but just as great. Tomorrow, Today is what I love about GOT7’s Fly with a dash of my favourite JYP group, DAY6. They get to show off the vocal skills they developed since we last saw them as a duo and, most of all, their range of wistful looks. Also, I love that for once they didn’t have to sing about love and how right a girl is, but rather about having to face tough decisions as they grow up. Live: M Countdown 17/08 – Genie showcase Other songs of note: Coming Home – On & On

  27. Palette – IU ft. G-Dragon

I don’t know why, I’ve never been a huge fan of IU until I watched Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo and found a sudden connection with her that I had never felt before. Her most recent album has helped bringing together my love for actress IU with singer IU. In an industry where being honest and clever is nobody’s priority, she manages to sound real and in control of what she does without abandoning her pop roots. I’m not sure many artists would manage to make an introspective song sound so pleasant and calm. Live:  Inkigayo 23/04 – Music Bank 28/04 Other songs of note: Can’t Love You Anymore ft. Oh Hyuk

  26. Archangels Of The Sephiroth – Stellar

If there had to be a swan song for Stellar, I’m glad it was Archangels Of The Sephiroth. With two members having already left and the other two on the way out, this was 100% the last single they put out with the formation we knew and loved, and we can’t even blame them for leaving. It’s a fact that this doesn’t have anything to do with their previous concepts, but I love the pseudo-satanic, pseudo-mystical vibe and I would have loved for them to keep going on this path. Archangels Of The Sephiroth gets more interesting with every listen, and the video is creepier with each view (bathtub of blood anyone?). As the song says, we really did love them till the end. Live: Inkigayo 09/07 – Music Bank 07/07

  25. Signal – Twice

Signal is by far the best Twice song ever – it’s interesting, kind of weird, and not necessarily super cute. Obviously the majority of the public hated it, and back to Likey we went. I love the bassline pushed right at the front, the dissonant harmonies, the fact that some of the mute members finally got to sing. Of everything they’ve released in 2017 (four comebacks is a lot for anyone) this is the only choice that doesn’t feel safe and completely within their sexy baby wheelhouse. They even get to have a proper storyline in the video, which is a rarity. Live:  Show Music Core 03/06 – Inkigayo 21/05 Other songs of note: Knock Knock – 24/7

  24. Wake Me Up – Taeyang

It’s kind of sad to think that this could be the last Taeyang single for years and years. At least it’s a ballad, so we will be able to all cry together when we listen to it after he’s enlisted.This album felt properly his – something that he created and composed, rather than something that was given to him to perform. Not that he’s ever lacked emotion, but Wake Me Up has a depth that is only second to Eyes Nose Lips. Live:  Inkigayo 20/08 – Fantastic Duo 03/09 Other songs of note: White Night – So Good

  23. Move – Taemin

This is possibly (definitely) the sexiest song of 2017. Taemin has such an eye for taking trends from the West and making them current for Korean audiences, as well as constantly changing his image while staying true to himself. I can’t get enough of the elegant electropop of Move, with the bass and the voice parts creating one of the sexiest musical combinations of 2017. Taemin carries a song that could have been much less interesting in the hands of an artist with less expressiveness. I don’t know if it’s the thought of the choreography, but this song always makes me blush a little. Live: Seoul Fashion Week – M Countdown 19/10 Other songs of note: – Rise – Day and Night

  22. Untitled 2014 – G-Dragon

If a ballad from Taeyang was expected, it certainly wasn’t from G-Dragon. I’m not sure how much truth there is the gimmick of titling the album with his real name and saying that he was finally stepping away from his persona, but Untitled 2014 feels painfully raw and real. Whatever happens from now on – after all the members of Bigbang enlist and eventually return to music – this album and this song will be a milestone in his career, and the perfect summary of what he’s done in the past eleven years. Live: ACT III M.O.T.T.E in Taipei 08/10 Other songs of note: Bullshit

  21. Change Up – Seventeen

You could take any random combination of Seventeen members and they would be able to put up an incredible show for you. This has been proven over and over by them, but I think that the Change Up subunit – the leaders of the standard subunits – has proven this definitively. I wouldn’t have thought of this song for them in a million years, yet they perform it convincingly and make it the catchiest Seventeen song of this year. Also, who knew that Woozi could have such swagger? Live: Mnet showcase Other songs of note: Don’t Wanna Cry – Clap – Habit – Rocket

  20. Rollin’ – Brave Girls

Every time I say “tropical house”, I add “drink!”. It has been so omnipresent in k-pop this year that it has been impossible to avoid. I skipped over Rollin’ the first few times I stumbled upon it because there were enough marimbas in my life, but I gave into the hype and this ended up being one of the most played songs of my year. As of last year, Brave Girls have an entirely new line-up – and yes, they did deserve a new name – and I hope that they will be the new bastion of sexy concepts now that there is no real mid-point between Laysha and cute concepts.  Live: M Countdown 03/09 – Show Champion Ep. 219

19. Never – Produce 101/Wanna One

This technically doesn’t count as a Wanna One song, but I’m pretty sure that if there is a song that symbolizes Produce 101 and the rise of the nation’s boy group, it’s Never . Written by Hui of Pentagon, another of my favourite groups, this song starts quietly, and slowly adds more elements until it gets to one of the best chorus drops of 2017. It made me wish that they had kept it for the final group instead of using it during the programme, and I wasn’t surprised at all when it was re-recorded by the final formation. Live: Wanna One version at KCON LA Other songs of note:  Energetic – Burn It Up

  18. Singing In The Rain – Jinsoul (LOONA)

Looking at the sheer amount of material that pre-debut group Loona have released this year gives me palpitations. A million members and subunits filled each month of 2017, and almost all the releases have been excellent – overall, they probably were the best group of the year. Jinsoul’s Singing In The Rain was my favourite song released – not by far, though, seeing the overall quality. I was especially impressed with how they managed to have Jinsoul sing and rap seamlessly, and how the song manages to be sexy without being inappropriate for a very young girl. And, of course, it’s a banger. Other songs of note: Loona released dozens of songs this year, so this is just a tiny selection of my favourites. Eclipse (Kim Lip) – new (Yves) – Sweet Crazy Love (Odd Eye Circle) – Loonatic (Odd Eye Circle) – Sonatine (1/3)

  17. Body Talk – Red Velvet

To me, this is one of the best songs by Red Velvet ever. Only a company like SM could waste it and have it  relegated to the b-sides of their mini albums; it’s a fantastic mid-tempo track that showcases the best vocal skills of the group, and allows them to sound about fifteen years older than title track Rookie. At least, in the arc of their three thousand 2017 comebacks, they managed to go from the childish image that they had patented in 2016 to the sultrier “velvet” image they have abandoned ages ago, even if it’s still paired with a “red” song. Other songs of note: Peek-A-Boo – Red Flavour – You Better Know – Would You – Talk To Me

  16. Circle’s Dream – Subin (Dalshabet)

Dalshabet haven’t had the best luck in their career. Subin is yet another amazing soloist that was in a group when she released a song, and has now left the label and disbanded her girl group. Seeing her solo by itself, it’s actually had to imagine her as part of bubbly Dalshabet: she is sensual, allusive, and her music is weird and enthralling. I love her voice and I love the ideas she has for herself – ideas that are far removed from traditional k-pop. The elements of this song are few, but she manages to create such a clever repetitive, circular structure with them, echoing the themes of the lyrics and capturing the listener. Subin is technically a solo artist now, so I am hoping we will get to hear much more of this.

  15. Yes No Maybe – Suzy

What makes me mad about Yes No Maybe is that nobody heard it. I can’t imagine how well it would have done if the now officially defunct Miss A would have released it, instead of Suzy now that her popularity is entirely tied to her acting and advertising career. It’s also true that she has always been my favourite Miss A, so it was delightful to see her come out with a debut album that does something interesting and doesn’t package her as the sexy ingenue character that she’s had since the beginning of time. Yes No Maybe strikes the balance between being  Latin, dancey song and a more introspective pop piece. Unlike half of her former group, Suzy has signed a new contract with JYP. Here’s hoping she gets to do more excellent, slightly left-field pop music. Live: &Live

  14. A Girl Like Me – Gugudan

It is still surprising that I don’t find the awkward beeping samples in the song insufferable, but the truth is that I love the weirdness and how it’s amplified by the singing parts. I already knew in February that this would be one of my favourite concepts of the year, and it is: there aren’t enough songs about how great the girls are, as opposed to their love interest. It’s not female empowerment, but I have the feeling we can’t get much closer. I love it even more considering how terrible their following comeback was . Live:  Music Bank 03/03 – SBS Korea Music Festival

  13. Island – Winner

It goes without saying that Winner is my favourite group in current k-pop, and they can hardly do any wrong in my eyes. However, this entire year could have been a disaster: they had to come back from losing a member who was the main singer and composer for the group. Island has the tropical (drink!) elements of their 2017 hit Really Really, but it’s a bit less conventional, and the video is delightful and incredibly romantic. Live: Inkigayo 06/08 Other songs of note: Really Really

  12. As If It’s Your Last – BLACKPINK

While I find most complaints against YG idiotic, it is absolutely true that having Blackpink release one single song in an entire year is ridiculous. The only good thing is that the song was brilliant, and I’m still not bored of it after having seen it performed at least fifty times. When it came out I found it really frankensteiny, but at this point the structure seems perfectly reasonable and linear to me (Stockholm syndrome at its best). Live: SBS Gayo Daejun – Show Music Core 01/07 Other songs of note: So Hot (Wonder Girls remix)

  11. Cactus – A.C.E

Every year I end up falling in love with one rookie group that will probably not see their third birthday, and in 2017 it was the turn of kings of thighs A.C.E., who singlehandedly resurrected early 90’s eurodance with their debut single Cactus . It was the one of a kind title of their song that attracted me, the weirdness of the thigh dance that drew me in, and everything else that made me stay. They are great singers, charismatic performers and can stand the most high-intensity dance of 2017 without blinking. I am so attached to A.C.E (and Dreamcatcher, full disclosure) that I broke my promise to never watch a survival show again and I am following Mixnine for them. Live:  Music Bank 02/06 – Music Bank 26/05

  10. Dinosaur – AKMU

What I love about AKMU is that when they try different genres, they always put so much of them into the song: nobody else could sing Dinosaur apart from them. It’s so simple, yet so full of detail; it’s true that it has EDM elements, but it’s not even remotely a club song. I’m still shocked every time I hear Suhyun hit those dolphin-high notes. The Stranger-Things-y video is still one of the most beautiful releases of  this year. Live: Dingo Music Other songs of note: My Darling – Reality

  9. Beautiful – Monsta X

This is yet another song of a overcrowded production that I am totally in love with. The bleeps and bloops leave plenty of space for the members to show their skill – especially Kihyun, who could sing literally anything to me at this point. Just like All In , Beautiful feels like the refined version of the chaotic, loud concepts Monsta X began with. There are raps and aggressive parts, but they are striving for a higher concept than “street urchins” now, and it’s reflected in their music. Live: 2017 MAMA in Japan – Show Champion Ep. 226 Other songs of note: Dramarama –  Now or Never – Shine Forever – I’ll Be There

  8. Runaway – Pentagon

Pentagon have already done a lot for being a group that has debuted just over a year ago. Of all these releases, Runaway is my favourite without any doubt: for me it strikes the right balance between the trendy elements that Hui has been carrying over from his Produce 101 successes, and the rougher concepts that Pentagon had to begin with. I find it hooky without being too in your face, and moody without being full-on tragic. Live:  Inkigayo 03/12 – Inkigayo 26/11 Other songs of note:  Critical Beauty – Violet – Like This – Get That Drink

  7. Boy – EXID

EXID are my everything. I feel bad for choosing Boy as my favourite song they’ve produced this year, when Night Rather Than Day was such a classy, unusual choice for them and Boy is just another dance song. Unfortunately, it’s just monstrously catchy, and my love for it eclipses (get it?) everything else they’ve released. Live: M Countdown 13/04 – Show Champion ep. 224 Other songs of note: Night Rather Than Day – DDD

  6. Chase Me – Dreamcatcher

Dreamcatcher are my rookies of the year. After scrapping the cute concept and adding a couple of members, they spent twelve months delivering a series of metal-inspired, horror-themed comebacks that managed to showcase the members’ talents.  While all their singles are amazing, there is something special about Chase Me and its chorus, mixing hammering instrumentals and creepy falsettos. There is no doubt that the only way from here is up, and there is nothing gives me as much joy as a girl group with a non-cute concept being (relatively) successful. Much bigger groups and bigger companies have refrained from embarking on international tours but Dreamcatcher have left survival show Mixnine to go on one. I can’t wait to see what these queens do in 2018. Live: M Countdown 19/01 – Music Bank 03/02 Other songs of note: Fly High – Wake Up – Sleep Walking – Good Night – Lucky Strike (Maroon 5 cover)

  5. Love & Affection – Seohyun

Seohyun’s solo came and went almost unnoticed at the beginning of this year: it was smothered by Taeyeon’s releases and the inevitable run-up to SNSD’s tenth anniversary. It really saddens me to no end that, now that Seohyun has left SM Entertainment, she seems to be going for an acting career, when she is such an amazing vocalist with such unique colours. With even her lead single receiving little attention, there was no hope for her b-sides. But Love & Affection is a masterpiece, with a booming chorus and a surprise ending, and what I hope to see if she ever decides to make more music under her new label.

  4. I Would – DAY6

There is only one criticism that I have for JYP and DAY6: there must be something else they want to do that’s not singing about love and heartbreak in pretty conventional ways. For the rest, there are only good things to say about the 25 songs they put out this year. It was hard to pick just one song to put in the list, and to be honest there are two or three other candidates I feel kind of guilty for cutting out. Live: EBS Space 11/05 – Kiss The Radio 04/08 Other songs of note: DAY6 released 25 songs this year, so this is just a tiny selection of my favourites. Goodbye Winter – You Were Beautiful – How Can I Say – I Wait – Lean On Me

  3. Good Thing – NCT 127

Despite the complete chaos that surrounds NCT at all times, I keep loving most of their releases (except Cherry Bomb , which I hated): they were my #1 and #3 most played song on Spotify with Good Thing and Limitless respectively. I love Good Thing in itself, but I also wish that NCT didn’t keep circling around that pseudo hip-hop, trappy, appropriative concept they’ve been given a million times and they did something brighter, poppier, that sets them apart from the three hundred hip-hop concepts that are going around without slipping into Astro territory. Live: M Countdown 05/01 – Show Music Core 07/01 Other songs of note: Limitless – 0 Mile – Back 2 U (AM 01:27)

  2. Tendae – Bobby

In an excruciatingly adorable interview for MTV Japan, Bobby says that with his debut album he wanted to show that he can do more than rap, and reveal his romantic side. I had already become obsessed with Bobby’s sing-rapping a long time ago, so Love And Fall gave be nothing but joy. His lyrics show that he’s capable of putting complex emotions in words, and most of all he is also completely able to translate that in his singing. 텐데 is sweet, heartbreaking, sexy. Bobby is one of the best performers of his generation, if not the best. Other songs of note:  Runaway – In Love

  1. Gashina – Sunmi

If there is one thing that Sunmi has taught us this year, it’s that there is a life after girl group disbandments. She came back singing about heartbreak and vengeance with dark humour and double entendres, a super-sexy choreography and a vibe that couldn’t be more far from the current sugary girl group trends. Everything about Gashina is iconic, from the song itself to the lyrics to the costumes to the choreography. Sunmi was without any doubt the queen of 2017. Live: Inkigayo 10/09 aka the iconic genderswapped performance – MAMA 2017 ft Taemin – Inkigayo 27/08

[clarilune]

Reviews and Why They Are Important

When I was eleven years old, my cousin (who’s a year older than me) suggested that we join a Pokémon forum. Since I was a fan of the Pokémon games, I agreed and became addicted to hunting down shiny pokémon, clinging very strictly to the discussion on shiny pokémon in the forums. (And now I have 15 legitimate shinies, caught through chaining and random encounters. -fist pump-) [EDIT 2017: Now I have almost 30. Sorry. Had to brag for a second.]

While I was (and still am) a gamer, I also was (and still am) a writer. Becoming frustrated with my original ideas, I decided fanfiction would be a good exercise for my skills. I began with Pokémon fanfiction and became addicted to it. Initially, I didn’t want to write. I only wanted to read and gain inspiration, so I fell in love with amazing stories like “The Legendarian Chronicles.” (Which is still a damn good story. Just saying. It’s written by Chibi Pika. Go read it.) Stories with epic adventures inspired me, so I sat down and started writing. However, there was something I very clearly lacked: planning.

Once upon a time, I didn’t plan out characters. I gave them faces and names, improvising personalities when the time came. I didn’t consider their histories unless it was relevant to the plot. I didn’t think anything else of the character unless it was directly related to the plot. Speaking of plots, I didn’t plan those out either. I didn’t even stop and think about what would happen. I only wrote in the moment and unthinkingly submitted chapters, eager for positive feedback.

After I’d written one chapter for a hurriedly designed story, I was certain I was going to get all sorts of praise upon submission. I thought people would tell me how my writing was amazing and my characters were spectacular. I was obsessed with writing description, so of course I went into blocks of detail about the environment and how things appeared. It gave me a great satisfaction. I felt that some people would receive the same enjoyment I received when writing it. I started a thread with my story as the title and waited impatiently.

One day passed by. After logging onto my account, the eleven-year-old I scampered to the thread I had started…only to discover that there was nothing. No one had replied or posted any sort of review.

I glanced at the number of views the thread had received. 60? How were there 60 views yet no reviews?

Slightly discouraged and peeved, I edited my post with a desperate demand for reviews. To spare myself from further frustration, I logged off and swore I wouldn’t get on until the next day. If I restrained myself, surely I would be rewarded with SOMETHING, right?

The next day, I reluctantly went to the thread. I had learned that getting my hopes up was never good. It never gave me anything in return.

Except, this time, someone had replied.

Barely able to contain my glee, I went to the response.

My jaw dropped.

It was perhaps the LONGEST review I had ever seen from anyone in my entire life. At first, I was happy. I started smiling so immensely that the muscles in my face ached. However, very soon, my smile began lowering into a frown.

I had never received constructive criticism up to that point. This was my first attempt at a fanfiction, and the first review I had ever gotten was probably one of the longest reviews I’ve ever encountered in my entire life, filled completely with criticism, tips, and advice. There wasn’t a single thing that the person had complimented about my writing. They analyzed each detail of the story, noting the lack of realism, grammatical errors, flat characters, and poor storyline.

I was stunned. My writing had always been praised by my family, friends, and teachers. I had been typing stories and sharing them in class since I was in kindergarten! I wanted to become an author…and now this person was saying my writing needed some definite improvement.

I didn’t flame or act petty in response. Instead, I asked, somewhat bitterly, “Was it really THAT bad?” It was the only thing I could do to keep myself from crying.

The person was thoughtful in their response, still very careful with their words. “No…There are just a lot of things you need to work on. You do have some decent lines of description, but the story is riddled with flaws right now. Brush up on grammar guides. Plan out your characters. Get a good idea of the plot. If you apply yourself and work on it some more, you’ll get a pretty good story going.”

At the time, I didn’t understand it. I hated that person. It felt like a personal attack. It felt like they had crushed my dreams with that review. They had made me realize that I wasn’t as good as I thought I was…so it made me think, “How can I ever become an author now?”

I quit the site, and I quit writing Pokémon fanfiction.

A few years passed. I started getting back into my love for fanfiction, but this time it was for a different fandom: Kingdom Hearts. That was when I joined fanfiction.net, but I promised myself I wouldn’t be publishing anything on the site. At least not for a long time, anyway.

Well, that backfired. The first Kingdom Hearts story I ever published was called “Wholesome” and I had written it on a whim. After my first attempt at fanfiction, I became obsessed with revising and editing…but I hadn’t learned from that reviewer at all.

I still hadn’t planned out any of the characters or the plot or anything before submitting the chapter. I tried planning out a few details of the characters as I went deeper into the fic, but ultimately I couldn’t plan any of the characters or the plot well. The story was also really difficult for me to write. I wanted my writing to be absolutely perfect, so it took me forever to finish one chapter. I became so stressed with actually writing it that the fun was taken out of it.

I wrote other things, other stories, but I felt myself missing Pokémon fanfiction. As I published other stories on the site, I still hadn’t learned from that one reviewer. I wasn’t planning stories or characters, as they had very specifically recommended. All of my stories were in dire need of it.

It wasn’t until reading and reviewing dozens of fanfictions later that I realized that that reviewer was correct. They had offered me all the steps for improvement, and I had refused it time and time again. I had been writing with so much discipline that it was stressful. It became incredibly difficult for me to enjoy it. And I couldn’t enjoy the process because I hadn’t planned anything out.

Because of that person, I now have the knowledge needed to write a good fanfiction. Because of that person, I now write very constructive, lengthy reviews to other authors in the hope I can pay it forward and help someone out as much as that person had helped me. Because of that person, I am now confident in my writing and have an awareness of the characters and the plot. Because of that person, I no longer expect blatant, pointless praise and have a desire to grow as a writer.

Untamed was the first story that was easy for me to write. I thoroughly planned out the characters, the plot, and the premise of the story. Most importantly, I didn’t stress about writing it. I wrote it for fun. That was perhaps why it was so easy, and why it’s still so easy for me to write.

So, why am I bringing this up? Because it shows that just ONE review can make a difference. At first, I was truly crushed by what that person had exposed in my writing. But now, I am incredibly grateful for what they did. The review was longer than any of the reviews that I write…and that’s saying something because I write extremely long reviews. Of course, that person also turned out to be an English major (Figures.) and is still extremely dedicated to fanfiction, but that’s beside the point. (I see them every now and again on ff.net and become torn between messaging them a thank-you or running in the opposite direction. They’re not THAT intimidating, but it’s as if I’m an eleven-year-old again whenever I see them.)

With that said, I’m not saying people should go out of their way to write huge reviews just because they feel obligated to. Do it because you want to help the person. Do it because you want the person to receive feedback for their effort. Do it because you want to.

This means people should review whenever they feel like it. But, if you have something to say (and I mean anythingatall), then you should say it. If you like the story, say it. If you dislike the story, say it. Authors only improve and thrive if they receive feedback for their efforts. Doesn’t everyone deserve that?

I’m not posting this because I feel I need more reviews or anything like that. I just think that some people have a very distorted perspective when it comes to reviews. Some people think reviews are what fuel the story. I remember there was this Kingdom Hearts fic I was following that received HUNDREDS of reviews. I only ever reviewed the story once and didn’t do anything for it until the author held a tirade. Apparently, the number of reviews per chapter had declined, so the author threatened to not post the next chapter until her demands had been fulfilled. People scampered to review after this, but it left a bad taste in my mouth. I reviewed with a sour tone and then deleted the story from my favorite’s after it had been completed.

Reviews do not fuel the story. Authors fuel the story. HOWEVER, authors sometimes struggle to fuel the story when no one supplies them with feedback. People want to know what others think of their creations. It leaves them feeling secure whenever someone says something.

This shouldn’t be the case, but we’re so solidly set in this willingness and desperation to gain approval from others that everyone depends upon reviews.

If someone truly loves someone’s writing or story enough, they will review. If someone truly dislikes someone’s writing or story enough, they will review. Plain and simple.

With that said, if you like or dislike a story and you DON’T review, you are screwing with the system. You’re probably missing out on a valuable opportunity to help someone. Whether it’s to give them a confidence boost, constructive criticism, or general feedback, not letting the author know your thoughts and feelings deprives them in the cruelest way.

For writers: you can write for enjoyment, but listen to what people have to say and be grateful if someone does say something. When you publish things, you are putting your work on display for THEM. People read to enjoy themselves in the same way you write out of enjoyment. Aim to inspire, but don’t seek mindless praise.

For readers/reviewers: say something. Let the author know what you liked or disliked about the story or chapter. Did you like this character? Did you like this description? Did you dislike what happened here? Out of the effort that they’ve done to write the story for YOUR enjoyment, the least you can do is tell them what you thought about it.

As my parting conclusion, I want to say everyone deserves a review like the one I received when I was eleven. I have learned and grown because of that person’s willingness to reach out to me despite all of the constructive (which I had interpreted as negative at that point in time) things they had to say. When I decide to stop being a scared little girl, I’m going to thank that person and let them know that they helped me out more than they could imagine.

It takes only one to make a difference. It’s so scary how true that is.

[teefirst]

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While consuming the fries Benny gave her, Eleven turns into so aggravated by the squeaking fan that she jams it together with her thoughts. She then calmly goes again to consuming. Mike notices Steve making an attempt to sneak into his sister’s room… whereas sneaking out himself.

When Steve notices that he is been observed, he initially tries to lean about casually whereas adopting a form of nonchalant “Hey, s’up?” perspective… whereas he is standing on a rubbish bin leaning on the storage roof.

Dustin assumes Eleven’s deaf and loudly claps his fingers. She is understandably startled.

Dustin: Not deaf.

Mike provides Eleven a few of his garments to put on, since hers are drenched. Adorable. Then she nearly adjustments in entrance of the boys. After convincing El to vary within the rest room, Dustin expresses his disbelief that she nearly obtained bare in entrance of them – full with making a disrobing gesture that knocks his personal hat off. He repeats this gesture each time he brings up Eleven’s weirdness.

The subsequent day, when Mike would not present as much as college, Dustin and Lucas theorize that he might have been caught with Eleven. What’s the very first thing Dustin asks?

Dustin: What if she slept bare?

Just the truth that the boys are precisely at that awkward age the place the idea of a unadorned woman is equally repellent and intriguing.

Lucas theorizes that Eleven is an escapee from a psychological hospital in a close-by county. Dustin asks him if he has a number of household there.

Lucas: Bite me.

Lucas’s comprehensible response to studying Eleven’s title.

Lucas: Her title is Eleven?

Mike: El for brief.

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It’s time I come clear and can help you guys know that my husband is obsessive about video video video games — as are all of his mates. We have one pal who started participating in Smash when it was launched at midnight until 7 a.m. If that doesn’t persuade you, then merely know it’s formally the top-selling on-line sport on Amazon for 2018.

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Lucas and Dustin keep at Mike’s home for dinner! While making an attempt to maintain themselves composed after studying concerning the individuals after Eleven.

And Eleven’s energy. And Eleven strolling down the steps behind Mike’s mother. Mike and the boys attempt to persuade Eleven to belief them.

Mike: They’re not gonna inform any adults. Right?

Dustin: (nodding) We by no means would’ve upset you if we knew you had superpowers. *Mike smacks him*

El decides to wander round the home throughout dinner regardless of Mike’s warning to remain within the basement. When he sees her, he chokes on his milk, inflicting his mom to look behind them, however Dustin brings her consideration again to the desk by slamming on it with each his fists.

Dustin: Sorry, spasm.

While explaining the phrase good friend to Eleven, Lucas brings up the significance of by no means breaking a spit-swear, which he demonstrates on

Dustin. In the following scene, Dustin will be seen wanting disgustedly on the spit on his palm and observing Lucas with a “what the hell” expression on his face.

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Lucas’s provides for on the lookout for Will embrace a “wrist rocket.”

Dustin: You’re gonna take out the Demogorgon with a slingshot?

Lucas: First of all, it is a wrist rocket. And second of all, the Demogorgon’s not actual. It’s made-up.

Dustin’s journey provides: a bunch of snacks. He justifies this by saying that Eleven’s the one weapon they want. He then tries to show his level by making her elevate a toy reproduction of the Millennium Falcon within the air. El simply stares at him whereas he drops it twice.

What’s finest about that is Eleven’s expression. Prior to this, she has been alternately terrified, scared, apprehensive, and nervous. In this second, although, she has essentially the most coolly disdainful look on her face. She’s not a skilled seal, and he or she’s not going to behave like one.

Even higher, she’s seen levitating the Falcon when she’s alone for her personal amusement in a later scene, as if to say: “I’m doing this for me, not for another person’s amusement.”

You simply know some superfans have been wincing on the fixed dropping of the Falcon toy in that scene. Dozens of Netflix viewers pondering “Dude! That factor is mint! Be cautious!”

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15 to Watch + top tech week of 91117

• The 2017 NFL season is officially underway. This past offseason was full of drama, excitement, and big names making big headlines. The Atlanta Falcons have a new stadium that still has problems with its roof, Tom Brady and his Patriots are favorites to win it all again, and Colin Kaepernick remains a free agent. With that, the NFL is kicking off the new season with a full head of steam. According to NFL Marketability Research conducted by E-Poll Market Research, the NFL brand still has the highest awareness of all professional sports, while remaining the “most entertaining” and “better than competitors.” The New Orleans Saints, Green Bay Packers, and Arizona Cardinals came out as the “most appealing” NFL franchises, while the two Los Angeles clubs – the Rams and Chargers – came in the bottom two slots. Individually, Larry Fitzgerald is the most appealing player in the league and Brady has the highest awareness among his peers. The NFL remains the gold standard among U.S. pro sports leagues, and actions by many, many NFL players and other athletes throughout the traumas of Hurricane Harvey and Irma – such as the Texans’ J.J. Watt raising over $30 million for Harvey relief – remind us that while every athlete can’t win an MVP award or stand atop an Olympic podium, true winners have hearts of gold.

• Sloane Stephens on Saturday defeated Madison Keys in straight sets to win the U.S. Open, capping a "remarkably rapid rise after sitting out 11 months because of foot surgery." Stephens is "only the second unseeded woman to win the tournament in the Open era," which began in 1968, joining Kim Clijsters, and Stephens’ victory came atop a U.S. Open women’s semi that featured an all-American cast for the first time since 1981. Prior to arriving in New York, the 24-year-old's 2017 earnings stood at $310,000 and her career earnings at $4.5 million, but that now stands at over $8 million after she collected a $3.7 million winner’s check. USA Today notes that Stephens has become the "new media darling of tennis.” (It doesn’t hurt that her boyfriend is soccer superstar Jozy Altidore.) And the Los Angeles Times’ Helene Elliott writes Stephens' win came at the right time for the "suddenly bright future of American women's tennis.”  Meanwhile, TLA Worldwide, which reps Stephens, sent an email congratulating her on the win and listed her marketing reps. Also in the winner’s circle: top Stephens’ sponsor Under Armour; she also stands to make millions more in endorsement deals as a result of her triumph.

• The inaugural Indy Women in Tech Championship presented by Guggenheim concluded Sunday with a victory by Lexi Thompson. Fans lined the ropes at The Brickyard Crossing Golf Course to watch 144 of the world’s best golfers compete for the IWiT Championship Title. The final stretch came down to Lydia Ko and Thompson. Ultimately, Thompson pulled away with a four shot lead over the competition to take home the inaugural Indy Women in Tech Championship presented by Guggenheim Title and the $300,000 winner’s check. Thompson joined the tradition of the Indianapolis Motor Speedway champions after her final round of the IWiT Championship by kissing the infamous Yard of Bricks, drinking milk, and receiving a victory wreath. Her win capped a successful weeklong schedule of tournament events designed to provide awareness and funding for specific women and tech initiatives, particularly those focused on robotics, STEM days, and career transitioning for those re-entering the workforce. Remarkable that this was only the first year of the Indy LPGA event, which came together under Guggenheim’s dedicated stewardship. The IWiT team has set a high bar, and look for even more women to benefit in 2018, inside the ropes and outside of them.

• Dallas Cowboys second-year quarterback Dak Prescott has leveraged his massively successful rookie campaign this offseason to expand his sponsorship portfolio. According to Yahoo Sports, Prescott inked more than a half-dozen new endorsement deals this offseason thanks to his “performance, storybook rise and relatable charisma.” Prescott is now set to make an astounding “10 times” his playing salary in endorsements this season, with Pepsi, AT&T, Frito-Lay, Beats by Dre, Campbell’s Chunky Soup, and 7-Eleven all signing on as new sponsors. On top of that, adidas, “one of his few sponsors prior to his rookie year,” decided to rip up its current contract with the Cowboys star and award him a brand new deal. Prescott recently had dinner with PepsiCo North America CEO Al Carey, who compared the quarterback to longtime PepsiCo partners Peyton Manning and Derek Jeter. On Sunday night, Prescott led his Cowboys to a marquee win over the Giants, 19-3. More high-profile primetime wins will only boost his marketability and brand value.

• After failing on a bid to buy the Houston Rockets back in 1993, Landry’s owner, CEO and billionaire Tilman Fertitta finally got what he wanted. According to ESPN.com, Fertitta has reached a deal with current team owner Les Alexander to buy the franchise for a record price of $2.2 billion. If the deal goes through, it would “eclipse the record” of $2 billion that Los Angeles Clippers Owner Steve Ballmer paid in 2014. The NBA Board of Governors will have to approve Fertitta as the next owner of the team before he officially takes control. The Houston-based billionaire has worked in sports before, as he was one of the original investors in the Texans. In 1993, Fertitta offered $81 million to buy the Rockets, but lost out to Alexander, who bought the team for $85 million. Just under 25 years later, Alexander is set to sell the team for over 27-times the price he bought it for…talk about a Return on Investment.

• Little Caesars Arena is finally open. According to the Detroit Free Press, the new home of the Detroit Red Wings and Pistons had its ribbon cut after architectural firm HOK managed to pull off a major “balancing act – creating a new mega-structure huge in its proportions that nonetheless contributes to the surrounding street life…” To build the arena and appropriately fit it into the surrounding community, the playing surface was placed about 40 feet below street level. In doing so, the profile of the arena is lower as to not “loom over its surroundings.” The deconstructed design puts all of the Red Wings’ offices, retail stores, and the box office outside the arena itself. HOK is being praised for its efforts to integrate the facility into the neighborhood in a non-dominating way. The use of varying types of brick and window treatments make the outside structure look like “a row of traditional urban buildings not unlike many others that line Woodward Avenue.” In economically challenged Detroit, a new arena to be shared by two of the city’s pro sports franchises is a welcome addition, providing economic impact as well as boosting community pride.

• The joint bid from the United States, Mexico, and Canada for the 2026 World Cup should win the hosting rights, unless a “crazy action” by President Donald Trump and his administration prevents it from doing so. According to SportsBusiness Journal, those are the paraphrased words of Relevant Sports Chair Charlie Stillitano, whose group runs the popular International Champions Cup. The joint North American bid still sits as a “firm favorite” to win over a last-minute bid submission from Morocco when a decision is announced next June. “The only thing that could possibly derail (the bid) is some crazy action on the part of our government, but I can't even imagine that,” said Stillitano. “It's ours to lose. I can't imagine we won't have the World Cup.” With an expanded field of 48 teams set to compete in the 2026 World Cup, the host of the tournament will be set to “bring in a lot of money.” With stadiums in Houston and Florida among the proposed sites to host World Cup matches, let’s hope that those traumatized communities will be able to use the ensuing years to rebuild from 2017’s terrible storms and widespread destruction.

• The Golden State Warriors may bring the Bay Area millions of dollars in positive economic impact, but that does not mean they are exempt from paying their bills. According to the East Bay Times, the reigning NBA champions “have not paid a cent” for their 2017 NBA Championship festivities in Oakland following their victory over the Cleveland Cavaliers. In total, the team owes up to $816,000. The Warriors are currently questioning “how the parade bill tripled in cost from an early estimate and wants to sort out the bill with the city.” Immediately after the parade, Warriors Vice President/Communications Raymond Ridder said that the team “planned to shell out” $4 million to cover all the costs, but that has not happened yet. Oakland officials are also asking the team to pay $244,000 for the cost of their 2015 NBA Championship parade. The city sent a $1 million bill to the team on July 19, with a due date of August 18, but ‘no money has changed hands.” While the city of Oakland owes the team an explanation, the Warriors have an obligation to crack open their well-stuffed vaults and pay for their fair share of the parade, if not more.

• The WNBA continues to rise, with 2017 attendance numbers coming as the league’s highest in years. According to SportsBusiness Journal, the average attendance marker of 7,713 fans is the league’s best since the 2011 season, up 0.8% overall from last year. While this number is positive for the league as a whole, individual teams reported mixed results – some posted double-digit growth while other experienced double digit drop-offs in attendance percentage. Leading the way in the WNBA was the L.A. Sparks, with an average of 11,350 fans per game at the Staples Center, “up a league-best 17.8% from last season and the team’s highest mark since 2002.” The other teams that posted double-digit growth were the Connecticut Sun, Minnesota Lynx – who played home games at the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul amidst Target Center Renovations – and the Washington Mystics. Conversely, the Indiana Fever (-12.1%), Atlanta Dream (-20.7%), and Dallas Wings (-26.9%) all experience double-digit falloffs. Athlete personalities rule pro sports, and the WNBA’s next task should be doing more to promote the personal brands of its most marketable stars – like Candace Parker, Skylar Diggins-Smith, and Elena Delle Donne.

• The Miami Marlins have a new ownership group, and with that might come a significant cut to the team’s payroll. According to the Miami Herald, a potential investor who was “specifically briefed” by the Bruce Sherman/Derek Jeter ownership group noted that they spoke about drastically trimming the payroll, with or without slugger Giancarlo Stanton on the roster. Stanton is due between $25 million and $32 million for each of the next 10 seasons, which is a primary reason that the team’s payroll currently sits at $115 million. If Stanton were to remain with the Marlins, the ownership group would aim to cut the payroll to around $80-85 million, but potentially to as low as $55 million if he is traded. Whether those numbers have “changed since the investor was briefed is unclear, because those conversations happened before the Marlins surged back into wild card contention in recent weeks.” The team is on pace to lose a whopping $50 million this year – even with deeper-pocketed new owners, they may not be able to afford to keep Stanton.

• Following an increasingly popular trend, the NHL’s Los Angeles Kings have become the most recent professional sports franchise to transition to paperless tickets. According to the Los Angeles Times, the Kings are making this move for the upcoming 2017-2018 season, though paper tickets will still be available for fans at a $100 fee during the regular season and at a $40 fee during the playoffs. Kings Vice President/Communications and Broadcasting Mike Altieri noted that the franchise pushed for paperless tickets last season, but the team’s efforts were confounded by the fact that they produced commemorative paper tickets for the teams 50th anniversary year. Some season-ticket holders “renewed for this season with the paper option thinking it would be a special, non-generic ticket and were disappointed.” Altieri added that season-ticket holders get a “membership card with their seat account data and a team store discount.” For many sports fans, a trip to a high profile pro game is not a regular occurrence but a bucket list check box. It’s important to keep providing them with tangible, physical mementos of their experience.

• Nike switched up its retail strategy at this year’s U.S. Open in Flushing Meadows by electing not to occupy its usual spot at the Billie Jean King National Tennis Center. According to the Wall Street Journal, Nike instead chose to “sell tennis gear through its suite of smartphone apps and pop-up locations” around New York. Some of Nike’s tennis sneakers could be bought at pop-up stores in Manhattan and Queens, including a special edition collaboration between Roger Federer and Air Jordan. With digital retail channels becoming more popular, Nike is attempting to stay ahead of the curve and stick to its plan of selling more wares online. Nike for years has “held prime commercial real estate outside Arthur Ashe Stadium, which it used to sell T-shirts, zip-ups and other gear worn by star players” Roger Federer, Maria Sharapova, and Serena Williams, among others. Adidas had a store on the grounds this year, as did event sponsors Wilson and Polo Ralph Lauren. Best guess is that Nike rethinks their on-the-ground retail strategy and returns to the Billie Jean National Tennis Center grounds in 2018 or 2019.

• Facebook is making a new push into sports streaming with its recent bid to land the rights to Indian Premier League cricket. According to Recode, Facebook’s five-year, $600 million deal did not ultimately win the bid, but it still shows the social network’s willingness to “put up that kind of money” in an auction. This comes as a “bold declaration” that Facebook will write “real checks” to gets its hands on “must-see sports content.” Star India, a subsidiary of 21st Century Fox, “won the auction for the IPL rights,” paying about $1 billion for its 10-year contract. Facebook is trying to compete against traditional networks for streaming rights, along with companies like Amazon that are also vying to make a splash in the sports streaming marketplace. Amazon and Yahoo were reportedly interested in the IPL bid as well, though neither ultimately made a bid to land the rights. But watch all of these digital giants continue to bid.

• Moving to a new market could mean big things for Chicago Bulls guard Zach LaVine. According to ESPN.com, after having spent the last couple of seasons with the Minnesota Timberwolves, the move to Chicago “meant an overnight rise in intrigue from a handful of brands looking to sign him.” Despite currently recovering from an ACL tear, LaVine is largely looked at as a player with some of the most untapped potential across the league thanks to his athleticism. His three-year deal with Nike is set to expire at the end of the month. Companies reportedly interested in signing LaVine to a shoe endorsement deal include adidas as well as Chinese brands Li-Ning, Anta, and Peak. Nike is “expected to aggressively look to make it own initial offer in the coming weeks to retain” the budding star. From a company’s perspective, LaVine has all the qualities an endorsable player needs: explosive, entertaining, “and a willingness to wear a variety of attention-grabbing sneakers.” Another important quality: LaVine has no LaVar.

• In a move to address the “hidden epidemic” of addiction to gambling in the United Kingdom, the Labour Party is pushing for English soccer clubs to stop signing gambling companies as jersey sponsors. According to the London Guardian, the proposed policy is “understood to be the first of a series of proposals to curb the power of gambling firms…” Gambling companies have had an increasingly large presence on the front of English Premier League jerseys, with Bournemouth, Burnley, Crystal Palace, Everton, Newcastle United, Stoke City, Swansea City, Watford, and West Ham all wearing betting firms on the front of their jerseys. These nine clubs represent almost half of the 20 clubs that comprise the EPL, showing a drastic shift in the demographic of kit sponsors from what it used to be. Even though many of the betting firms are not from the United Kingdom, their names “are seen on TVs every weekend, during the segments of football that break up the adverts for British bookmakers.” The betting firm genie has been out of the bottle for a long time, and she continues to grow. Don’t look for her to jump back in unless some major match-setting scandal besets the league.

  • Tech Top Five

1) The NFL, Wilson Sporting Goods, and Zebra Technologies have partnered on a project for the 2017 NFL season that will bring a new level of data to NFL teams and fans. Every NFL football this season will have a chip implanted into it that will relay data about the ball’s location, speed, and rotation metrics. The technology made its debut in the 2016 Pro Bowl and was also used in kicking balls on Thursday Night games during the 2016 NFL season. Jill Stelfox, Zebra Technologies General Manager of Locations services, had to this to say about the use of data in football: “It’s been a couple of years of an iterative process. How can we focus on the plays when it’s both fun and important? I think we’re in that early phase of looking at that for the ball. I do think data will get to fans soon, which will be fun.” Through these data points and using the chips in NFL games, fans will have a new feature to dig into while viewing. In the statistics-driven fandom of sports today, the NFL is doing all it can to quench the proverbial thirst of fans for more specific and interesting data.

2)    According to SportTechie.com. Garmin has added a new feature to its line of smartwatches that will help intense trainers conveniently make purchases. The Vivoactive 3, a new model of Garmin smartwatches, has included contactless payments into its new features. As a result, watch wearers can purchase items such as food and equipment straight from their watches. Dan Bartel, Garmin Vice President of Worldwide Sales, had this to say: “Anyone who is out and about being active can relate to the struggle of where to stash a credit card or cash, and has had to forgo a post-workout snack or coffee as a result. We’re solving that dilemma with Garmin Pay, an exciting feature on the new Vívoactive 3. Use it pretty much wherever contactless payments are accepted, and give yourself one less thing to remember when you’re leaving the house.” With new features like this, Garmin is looking to get an edge over competitors like the Apple Watch. While Garmin doesn’t have connectivity between products like Apple does between its watches and smartphones, Garmin proves its ability to stay ahead of the curve in this competitive wearables market. 3)    Kansas City Chiefs Quarterback Alex Smith used a new type of helmet in the NFL season opener last Thursday night. Smith wore Vicis Zero1 helmet, which ranked first out of 33 helmets tested by the NFL and NFL Players’ Association this past year. According to CNBC, after testing the helmet in both training camp and the preseason, Smith was so impressed he not only decided to wear the helmet, he also became an initial investor in the Vicis. When asked about what benefits he sees coming from the new and improved line of helmets, Smith said, “Obviously, I’ve had a little history with head stuff, and for the first time, there seemed to be new technology in the helmet. For me, it was just finally this big science push. You actually had real scientists developing this and thinking about it.” If Vicis is successful in not only convincing NFL players to use their new helmets, but actually stopping concussions, the future of the NFL could be changed. The fear of sustaining concussions and CTE through football is very real, and youth football player numbers have decreased as a result. With a more proven means of preventing head injuries, the NFL could ensure that their sport survives in the coming years. 4)    Major League Baseball fans are now able to watch the Boston Red Sox like never before. Intel and NESN have partnered on a project to start a four-game pilot of broadcasting Red Sox games in Virtual Reality.  In June, Intel began broadcasting a game in VR every Tuesday, but now they have an agreement with a specific team. The games will be available to NESN subscribers on the NESNGo VR App. From NESN.com: “Choose your preferred camera angle, or sit back and watch a “director’s cut” of all the VR cameras, all while seeing a 180-degree camera perspective. Look all around and soak up the Red Sox and Fenway Park. Look further beyond, right or left, and you’ll see real-time team line-ups and statistics. Look up and you’ll see an expanded box score. Look down and you can select your desired camera angle.” If this is any indication, MLB could be moving toward VR sooner rather than later. MLB fans will soon have packages available to watch their favorite team from their couch as if they’re in the stadium. With more accessibility to the VR headsets, VR set-ups could become a common household appliance.  5)    The Boston Red Sox were embroiled in a cheating scandal this week as they were caught stealing signs from the New York Yankees during a game. The New York Times chronicled the controversy specifically: “The Yankees, who had long been suspicious of the Red Sox’ stealing catchers’ signs in Fenway Park, contended the video showed a member of the Red Sox training staff looking at his Apple Watch in the dugout. The trainer then relayed a message to other players in the dugout, who, in turn, would signal teammates on the field about the type of pitch that was about to be thrown, according to the people familiar with the case.” All MLB teams look to technology to give themselves an advantage. However, sometimes teams can take that initiative too far. In the case of the Red Sox, they used a member of their training staff to relay signs to players on the team. This was a clear violation of MLB rules, but it brings up an interesting discussion about what role technology will play for teams during games. Should teams be able to use Apple Watches? Should teams even have access to any video during games? Expect these questions to be discussed at length this offseason.

[furynewsnetwork]

Quoting old movies is fun, particularly when they involve surreality.  Government functions are almost entirely surreal, but quoting them is rarely fun … unless Trump is somehow involved.  Love him or loathe him or something in between, he’s brought fun quotes back to self-governance.  And with them come the witch hunts.

There are ways to tell if someone is a witch.  What do you do with witches?

Burn them!

And what do you burn apart from witches?

Republican officiocrats who work for a loathably abrasive New York democrat twitter freak holding the White House as a republican that the Deep State Swamp is desperate to delegitimize because he’s declared war on it.  In other words: more witches.

Never mind that Medusa sold foreign policy futures to foreign government agents in the guise of contributions to her and Cuckold Bill’s charitable foundation.  The real issue is that members of the Trump campaign met with Russian government provocateurs who − wink wink nudge nudge, your wife’s a goer − had “information” on Medusa that would “bring down” her campaign.

Therefore, he’s made of wood.

And this contact wasn’t disclosed on the security questionnaire, which means he lied.  The only reason you lie about something this substantial is to hide the truth.

Therefore, he weighs as much as a duck.

The officiocrat’s security questionnaire was amended four times, and now contains hundreds more foreign contacts.

Therefore …?  A WITCH!! BURN HIM!!

Time the fuck out.  Has anyone ever completed one of those security clearance questionnaires?  I have.  Multiple times.  I’ve held a clearance for most of the time since 1980 when I joined the Air Force.  It is form SF86, in case anyone wants to follow along.  It can be found online.  Giving answers that can be construed as lies by those wishing to do so is trivially easy, for the form was devised by bureaucrats and their legion of loyyers.

The current version [as of 2014] is 157 pages long in its raw form on paper, including instructions and multiple release of liability and signature pages.  Paper applications are no longer accepted; it is now completed online requiring a government login ID and irrationally long gibberish password that cannot be remembered and must never be written down.  You will be calling the toll free help desk repeatedly to have your password reset.

You may not advance to the next section of the form until the current section is completely answered.  Unless you are fresh from the womb, you will have scores of addenda and explanation pages to add information.  These addenda are needed for families larger than you and two parents and one sibling, for any travel farther afield than the local Walmart, and for anything you’ve done more complex than buying a stick of gum.  God forbid you have a relative − to include in-laws − born in a foreign country.  I have such an in-law.

But still, I’m an incredibly boring individual with a relatively small family and no social or civic affiliations to speak of.  I’m a libertarian and thus have no meaningful political affiliation, either.  One investigator in the 90s looked at me and my paperwork and said, “Ah … N J.”  I quizzed, “N J?”  He replied, “Non-joiner.”

My most recent clearance application ended up being 380+ pages long.  …Not including instructions and signature pages.  It took me over five weeks to complete.

The online form has pull-down menus for standard fill-in-the-blanks.  But just try explaining where your father-in-law came from.  He’s been living in the US since the age of 9, but was born in a village in Yugoslavia to German parents.  He spent the first 7 years of his life in Nazi, and then Soviet, prison camps.  The online form no longer lists Yugoslavia as a legitimate nation [I used Angola, since it was listed first and I was not about to dignify their inept system], nor does it accept his home town.  The village itself was obliterated de facto by the Wehrmacht and de jure by the follow-on Tito government.  After the dissolution of Yugoslavia, the specific location may be in Serbia, or Bosnia, or Slovakia, no one is quite sure.  Not that it matters anyway; it’s gone.  His naturalization document lists a naturalization center in the US no longer in existence and therefore not in the pull down list.  His naturalization is identified by a certificate number using a layout no longer recognized as valid − not enough digits.  My father-in-law is just generally suspicious, I suppose.

Explaining this one fairly trivial matter that I covered in one paragraph took − I recall − 15 additional pages on the SF86.  Maybe more.  One’s eyes tend to glaze over after a certain amount of useless necessity.  In any event, it took 15 pages too many.

But then comes the sections of the questionnaire that has caused Trump teammates so much trouble, and which would cause me the same trouble were I a republican party officiocrat instead of a mere libertarian DoD data analyst: section 19, about halfway through form SF86, “foreign contacts”.

I have been on eleven cruises, and I’ve met literally thousands of foreigners.  Most were wearing name tags, and many of those who weren’t told me their names.  I wrote down none of them.  With the exception of maybe a half dozen, I couldn’t tell you much more about them than their first name, sometimes not even that.  There is Pedro [last name unknown], the effusively friendly manager-slash-head waiter of a little cantina [forgot the name] on the second floor over a souvenir shop [forgot the name] on the main tourist drag [forgot the name] of San Miguel on the island of Cozumel.  We visit the place for lunch every time we’re there.  Pedro’s head is shaped like a bowling ball, if that helps the investigators any.

There is Major Tom [last name unknown], the unofficial greeter for the nation of Belize, and head of the Belize City Chamber of Commerce.  He runs several tourist excursion operations, including one we took our first time there.  He used to be in the Belizi army − hence his title of Major.  He looks like a young Ricardo Montalban, or did the last time I saw him.

There is Ngede [last name unknown], our Indonesian head waiter on not one but two cruises, on two different ships … and what are the odds?  Highly suspicious if I were a republican officiocrat.  He has his First Night patter down: the nearest any English-speaker can ever come to pronouncing his name is “g’day”, so just say G’day.  He has an advanced degree in engineering, but works as a waiter on US cruises because at $10 a day plus tips he makes more than an engineer in Indonesia. …where you have to be politically connected [i.e., the correct race, the correct tribe and the correct religion, none of which includes him] in order to get a job that pays more than twenty-five cents an hour.  He is now considered extremely wealthy among his countrymen … at least on his time off when he goes back home.  He showed us how to make a rat out of a linen napkin.

There’s the guy on Cayman who runs Moby Dick’s − the stingray encounter excursion.  His name is Richard something, and he’s from England.  He charges almost $100 American for a thirty minute boat ride and a bucket of squid to twenty folks at a time to feed the stingrays tamed by generations of hand-feeding on a sandbar in the sound.  Wouldn’t know him on sight.  He was thoroughly unremarkable, apart from being well-tanned.

On the ship, I try to find one of the bars with a particularly attractive bartender and get my glass of before-dinner wine or after-dinner drambuie from her.  The last two cruises these bartenders were in the form of a cutey from Ukraine, and a hotsy from Brazil.  I impressed the Ukrainian by knowing how to say please [pazhalsta], thank you [spaseeba], goodbye [da svedanya] and I’m bored [mnya skuchnya] in Russian.  I made my bartender from Ipanema laugh by butchering the words to Mas Que Nada.  I have long forgotten their names.

But by far, the most memorable foreign contact I had was a little boy, maybe four years old. He was paying close attention to the cracks in the sidewalk while walking with his mother, an attractive twenty-something, and older brother, maybe seven years old.  This was down one of the back streets of San Miguel on Cozumel.  I was searching for a cheap cantina serving actual Mexican tacos.  The older brother was in navy blue shorts, starched white shirt, and a solid black tie.  His shoes were polished black.  He was going to school, and mom was walking him there.  I was approaching them on the sidewalk, and as we neared I smiled and said, “Hola.”  Mom smiled back, and the older brother looked puzzled.  Both said “Hola.”  The four year old boy, though, looked up from the cracks under his feet, directly at me.  He pointed and announced, in surprise, “Mama!  Gringo!”

His mother was mortified, and stammered a Spanish apology interlaced with scolds directed to her child.  I laughed and told her “De nada.”  I still laugh when I replay it.  But that was it; that was the entire foreign contact.  I never quizzed them for their names.  Were I a republican officiocrat I’d be required to.

Section 19 of form SF86 requires full names, addresses, dates and places of birth, employer[s], all nicknames, not to mention affiliations, and purposes, and outcomes of all foreign contacts.  Per instructions, it limits the contacts required to be disclosed to those of “close and continuing” nature, but one’s definitions of “close” and “continuing” are extremely subjective, and might well rely on political partisanship.  Very few of the items under foreign contacts allow for the option of declaring “I don’t know”.  “I don’t remember” is not permitted at all.

As someone who’s had a clearance for over thirty years and a Top Secret clearance for all but my four years in the Air Force, I know exactly what they’re trying to get at here.  They want to know if a clearance candidate has ever encountered any foreigner who went out of his way to indicate that he was trying to dig for information about things he shouldn’t be digging for.  “Has any foreigner you’ve ever encountered asked you nosy questions about what you do, who you do it for, or otherwise acted like a spy?  If yes, list as many details as possible.”

That’s what they’re trying to ask, but they don’t.  Instead, they require that anyone wanting a security clearance from the US government act like a spy themselves every time they encounter a foreigner, by getting full names, addresses, dates of birth, employers, the foreigners’ affiliations and purposes for existing … none of which anyone ever does.  You don’t go on a cruise with a notebook and stubby pencil demanding the names of every vendor hawking his souvenirs upon every passer-by.

“Come in! Come in! We have condition air.  Feel all cool and cold while buy your pretty wife a necklace, eh?”

Not until I know your full name, date of birth, nationality, who you work for, and what civic groups you participate in.

… yeah, not gonna happen.  As a result, almost everyone filling out this form leaves these things out.  And no one cares that you leave these things out.  …unless you’re a republican officiocrat working for an outsider president that everyone loathes because he’s harsh, abrasive and an outsider who’s declared war on the Deep State Swamp which creates − among other things − obscenely obstreperous national security clearance questionnaires.

Section 20 of form SF86 inquires after “foreign activities”; subsection A deals with foreign holdings, of which I have zippo.  Oh, drat.  I have a self-directed IRA which has mutual funds which hold foreign stocks and bonds.  Subsection A is trying to find out if I have meaningful holdings.  Never mind that “meaningful” is arbitrarily and subjectively determinable itself.  Ah, the hell with it; “No”.

“Do I own, or plan to own, property in a foreign country.”  Yes, I plan to retire to Mexico.  I like Mexico.

“Give the date of purchase, or planned purchase.  Where do you plan to purchase property, and what price are you paying for it?”  What? The hell?  I veered off onto one of the “explanation” pages with the following:  Listen, guys, if you think I can give you the speculative date and speculative location and speculative price of a speculative purchase of a retirement home for a speculative retirement and have this information mean a single god damn, then you must think I have a crystal ball.  If I had a crystal ball I’d be using it for personal enrichment and wouldn’t need a job which requires a clearance.  I plan to retire in Mexico, at some point, don’t know where, when, or how, but a guy can dream.  That’s all I’m saying about it.

I’m not going to describe the other 5 pages of this subsection.  Needless to say, it’s more of the same useless necessity.  Each item must be answered; “I don’t know” is not usually accepted.

Subsection B: foreign business, professional or government contacts.  Uh oh.  I’ve had literally hundreds of contacts with foreign government agents. … that I know about.  Knowing the nature of government, I’ve probably had dozens more government contacts that I don’t know about.  Eleven cruises, multiple port calls each cruise, encountering customs agents, port security wonks, police − in Limon Costa Rica, we were trying to find an outlet for the local coffee so I could bring home a few pounds of whole beans.  Had a conversation with dos policia who knew bupkus English.  With my formal Spanish lessons ending in 7th grade forty years prior, and my informal Spanish picked up in bits and pieces [Dos cervezas, por favor.  Muy Frijo.  Donde es el baño?] … my wife reports it was an amusing conversation to watch, and it would undoubtedly have been fun to participate in had I not been hung over.

Do I have to list these government contacts, to include full name, nationality, government agency and rank or title, date[s] and purpose of contact and all “offers” made?  I do if I’m a republican offiocrat working for the aforementioned outsider president loathed by the Deep State Swamp.  Does el policia pointing me at a bodega which sells coffee beans constitute an “offer”?  If I’m a republican officiocrat, yes.

Additionally, I’ve undoubtedly run across government agents burrowed into excursion outfits watching for illicit activities − you know what those Americans are like when they get closer to the source of their recreational drugs.  Many Americans attempt to score their own while visiting drug exporting nations, and their arrogant self-absorption is a direct contributor to the unsolved murders of dozens of us a year.  But do I know they are undercover government agents?  No I do not.  Does it matter?  Do I have to list them as well, even though I don’t know who they are?  Only if I’m that republican officiocrat.

There are another 7 pages of this subsection that I won’t go into.  All items must be answered; almost none apply.  “I don’t know” is only acceptable for a small portion of the items.

Subsection C: foreign travel.  Once again: eleven cruises.

Specific dates [which I no longer know] for each nation visited.  And for each nation describe once again the information previously inquired after in section 19.  This was the section that was trying to, but did not, ask, “did any foreigner get too nosy about things that are none of his business?”

It had taken me three weeks to get to this part of form SF86.  I’d long ago exceeded my tolerance for bureaucratic impertinence, and used one of the many “explanation” pages to freeform the following paraphrased blowback: Lookit, my wife and I have taken one cruise a year between 2004 and 2012, and one year we took two when we had both our parents along.  You have much more access to the dates of our cruises than we do at this point; all I can tell you is that they were usually in May.  We’ve met thousands of foreigners, and over a hundred foreign government weenies, and not one of them was any more forward than to pester us about emptying our wallets in their particular store.  No one asked what I do, or who I do it for, and no one especially asked if I had any government secrets to give out.  The only thing any of them wanted was my business.

I bawled out the apparatchik in the Deep State Swamp with irreverent, impetuous scold.  And once again, does this matter?  The answer is, once again: only if I am a republican officiocrat working for the well-loathed outsider New York democrat holding the White House as a republican and who declared war on the Deep State Swamp.

The nature of government bureaucracy is to evolve into an endless stream of gotchas.  It is these gotchas that are levied against anyone chosen to be the witch du jour.  You would have to be blind or a partisan shill to fail or refuse to see who is being gotchaed at the moment.  The republican officiocrat was doing opposition research during the presidential campaign, and was contacted about gaining opposition candidate spice.  He showed up to get the spice and met two Russians, neither of whom said, “Hey!  I’m with Moscow and work for Putin!” thus cluing him into it being a government contact.  The meeting was short, and the subject was not juicy gossip about Medusa; it was about US sanctions that resulted in Moscow curtailing Russian adoptions to the US.  The meeting was abandoned and none of the players ever met again.

Section 19 of SF86 requires − per instructions − “close and continuing” contact with foreign nationals to be disclosed.  A single meeting with a female Russian loyyer and her [from all accounts] silent partner is neither “close” nor “continuing”.  Unless, of course, you have it in for the republican officiocrat and the well-loathed guy he works for.  Therefore … a witch.

In contrast, the encounters with my bartender from Ipanema, occurring each day of the cruise before dinner for a glass of wine, and after dinner for a glass of drambuie was, in comparison, intimate and perpetual.  Even though I no longer remember her name − it was five years ago now − I learned much more about her than any republican officiocrat ever knew about the two Russians.

But it doesn’t matter because I’m not a republican officiocrat working for a New York democrat playing a republican president on twitter, and who declared war on all the jealously self-important bureaucrats who spend their days constructing 157 page long gotchas with which they can play king for a day.

King?  Pffft.  We didn’t vote for them.

You don’t vote for kings.

How’d they get to be kings then?

The Deep State of the Swamp, arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Regulation, signifying by authoritarian providence that they, the bureaucrats, should rule this land.

Listen, mysterious functionaries lying in ambush distributing arbitrary rules is no basis for a system of government.  Supreme executive power derives from broad support of the masses, not from some farcical procedural ceremony.

I fart in your general direction.

Ni.

You’ll be dead in a minute.

BU-U-U-URN him!!

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