#whew. emotions amirite

[sagesolsticewrites]

touchstarved | Austin Butler x gn!reader

a/n: i was feeling incredibly touchstarved tonight and… this was the result dkfjadkfjh 

Word count: 942

Warnings: touch starvation, implications of depression?, reader is Not Doing Great mentally tbh (but it’s okay! happyish ending!!), would this qualify as hurt/comfort?? idk dkjghsdkh, I think that’s it? As always, please let me know if I missed anything!

Please like/rb if you enjoyed! 🤍

Masterlist | add yourself to my taglist!

day 59 since Austin had left for Australia.

nearly two months since you’d felt his arms around you at the airport, warm whispers in your ear of see you soon and i love you and get home safe and i’ll call you the second i land.

and he had. in fact, he had been diligent about calling you nearly every day, even if it was just for a few minutes, just to hear your voice, and sending you good morning, sweetheart and sweet dreams, beautiful texts across the 18-hour time difference between the two of you.

but none of that changed the fact that he wasn’t here to hold you, kiss you, hug you, and you hated it.

if you were honest, you hated yourself a little bit for feeling this way. this was the biggest break of his career, and you were feeling sorry for yourself because you wanted a hug?

but it was more than that. you hadn’t been very affectionate with anyone before Austin, but in the past year or so of dating him, you’d gotten used to having someone to hold hands with as you were walking down the street, to hug when you got home from work, to cuddle with as you watched a movie. you thought you’d be fine while he was gone — you’d been fine before, hadn’t you? — but every time you woke up to his side of the bed being cold, every time your hand dangled at your side, empty, on the way back from your favorite coffee shop, every time you found yourself hugging a pillow during your solo movie nights… you felt like you were missing something essential to you.

touchstarved.

you had come across the term on some social media or other and though you hadn’t quite admitted that that’s what you were feeling, you quietly did some research and invested in a weighted blanket, a body pillow, and some face masks for when you needed a self-care day. 

and they did help, at least for a while. but some part of your brain was frustratingly insistent that nothing was going to help like Austin actually being here was.

he won’t be back for a while, you mentally retorted, shifting under the weighted blanket and hugging the stuffed elephant Austin had gifted you on your birthday even closer, so deal with it.

it was at that moment you heard what sounded like keys jangling at your door.

you froze. you definitely weren’t expecting anyone. was someone breaking in?!

You carefully sat up, dropping the stuffed animal as your hand crept towards the baseball bat you had ready near your bedside table. should you call the police? you wondered, but as you experimentally tapped your phone, it stayed dark. dead.

steeling yourself, you tiptoed out to the living room. better to try to catch them before they took anything, you figured.

you still heard something jangling at the door — had whatever they were using to try to pick the lock gotten stuck? — so it seemed like you had the upper hand for now. adjusting your grip on the bat, you readied yourself as the knob finally turned and—

the bat slipped from your hands, clattering onto the floor as you tried to process Austin walking through the door, the excited smile on his face slipping towards a look of concern.

“hey— woah, honey… Y/N, sweetheart, is everything okay?”

“i… i thought you were someone trying to break in,” you respond numbly, blinking repeatedly as if to assure yourself that this was real, “what… are you doing here?”

“i wanted to surprise you,” your boyfriend replies with a sheepish grin, closing the door behind him and turning back to you with his hands raised in innocence, as if to show you he means no harm. he takes a step forward as he continues explaining, “we were a little ahead on filming, so Baz gave us a little break—“

that one small step, though, was enough to snap you out what whatever spell you were under, and his explanation is cut short as you crash into him, wrapping your arms around him and burying your face into the crook of his neck, breathing in his warm sandalwood scent that had slowly been fading from your pillows.

“i missed you,” you whisper against his skin, so soft that he doesn’t hear so much as feel your lips forming the words on his neck. you feel yourself shaking slightly, and under normal circumstances you’d be more than a little embarrassed, but right now you don’t care because he’s here, real and warm and solid underneath you.

“i missed you, too, sweetheart,” he chuckles in reply, though it’s tinged with worry as he feels you trembling. “hey, you okay?” he murmurs, moving to pull away so he can see your face, gauge how okay you really are.

but you don’t let him, your only reply being a nod of your head into the crook of his neck and a tightening of your arms around him, blinking back the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as it hits you just how much you needed this. he relaxes, seeming to recognize that he won’t be escaping the circle of your arms anytime soon, instead pulling you closer and murmuring soft i love yous and i missed yous into your ear.

he can ask you about how you’re feeling later — because clearly this goes deeper than a normal long-distance trip — but for now he lets himself relax into your arms, trying to make up for the nearly two month’s worth of hugs that he’s missed from you.

[bengiyo]

Last Twilight Ep 5 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Mhok took Day’s teasing that he has no tenderness in him as a personal challenge, and spent the entire episode flirting with Day through all of Day’s other senses.  Meanwhile, we ran into Gee, who was a friend Day had through badminton. Day managed to reconnect with her and hang out with some of his team members (but not August). Meanwhile, Porjai broke up with that cheating fiancé of hers, but not before he and Mhok got into another fight. We also learned that Porjai is pregnant, and is going to be staying with Mhok for now. Everyone kept saying how hot Mhok is, and after flirting with Day constantly, Day decided to sneak next to Mhok at night and look at his face.

It’s early and Mhok is already starting.

Oh ho! We’re playing around with honorifics again.

This breakfast scene is great. Day got himself up, made his own jellied bread, and didn’t balk at posting a picture to Facebook about it. It’s a good sign that he’s moving back into interactions with others.

Wait, why are we back to reading the book? I thought we were heading to the badminton match?

Oh, whew, it was a flashback providing some emotional context before we meet more people.

Okay, Day teaching Mhok how to comment on badminton is fun. He’s not an amateur, and Mhok doesn’t know the rules.

Film looks good.

I am a fan of sports. I was moved by Gee’s win and cried a little bit.

I love Mhok beginning to integrate into the banter with Gee.

Our first interaction with August and Day flees.

I’m loving this backstory. I am such a fan of sports drama.

Aof and his double entendres. “If you want to pick it up again, handle it with care.” I will fight him.

Thank you, Pride flag in the locker room, for letting us know there are gay stakes between Day and August.

Ohm Thipakorn is whipping extreme ass here with these eyes. You are upgraded from “Baby Ohm,” sir.

I am crying again because of the bonds between men. Even Mhok approves of August moving to singles rather than compete with someone else.

So, how mutual are the feelings between Day and August, and how much does the other know, because August took his hand in such a meaningful way before asking him out to dinner.

I’m with Mhok; I like him pushing Day to hang out with August.

Oh yes. It’s time for a practice date. We’ve gotten a few of these this year, and it hits every time.

Porjai ain’t shit, and she’s not gonna let Mhok go without getting a dig in.

I love how Mhok responds to all of Day’s teasing by going hard on the flirting.

This whole cake scene was cute as hell.

Oho, we’re getting back to the Night and Day stuff. Day thinks Mhok has also been fooled by Night.

Oh no. Please don’t spill water on yourself immediately and panic, Day.

It’s always 4:20 somewhere, amirite? (I don’t smoke)

Now where the fuck is August?

I’m glad Mhok stuck around to salvage this outing.

They went back to see if August ever arrived? I’m mad at August.

I AM LEANING IN. Day hadn’t confessed his crush on August, and today felt his heart break at some sort of final piece of reality he had to face.

August picked the most dramatic time to show up, and then just walked away after sensing something between Mhok and Day.

There’s so much going on! Mhok was about to admit his own feelings, but stopped because of August.

This was an excellent episode. I’m so proud of Ohm for being able to do more than just be adorable. We’ve got a great form of romantic angst here where the board isn’t completely set, but we know the players. These two definitely practiced a lot for this role. Jimmy has found his smolder.

[eveningspirit]

I love your answer and thank you for taking the time. It is way better. :D

I also wanted to write a detailed meta on the episode, but.. whew, where did this week go? So, well, I'll write it in answer to your meta. [Bear in mind that I've already watched episode two, so there may be mentions, but I'll try not to get too spoler-y (and then, we can talk about episode two in a separate post, amirite? because, in case you haven't seen it yet, it was A-mazing)].

Okay, so I was both excited and disappointed by the season premiere. I'll get back to that.

Last season, like I said -- I can forgive them not digging into the aftereffects of Adam getting shot, especially in light of those two episodes. The season was shortened and, it seems, they wanted to give this storyline justice, so they simply moved it to the current season (and that is exciting!).

The premiere episode was about Voight, yes, but it was also a reminder of all the roots of Adam's trauma. He was held at gun-point, just like in the finale of S10. The scene was very explicit with showing his reaction and me-guesses even casual viewers had to think back to that moment.

Still, if anyone missed it, he later told Martell "Not the first time I stared down the barrell." They couldn't be more obvious, yeah?

In the second episode we have yet another reminder of the scene between Adam and a ten-years-old boy aiming a gun at him, albeit not in as on-the-nose manner (this time someone else is at the fiery end of the gun and it ends well ;).

So, even though it's a season later, the writers have established that Adam was through trauma, and now he has a new, fresh trauma on top of it. Now we can get to the proper story about the aftermath of it all.

And gads, lemme tell you how happy I am about it. I love it, when they let PJ Flueger act. He's amazing (IMO), I have seen, like 95% of his other roles -- I do that for most actors whose characters I like -- and I loved them all. While, with others it's usually the character, that pulls at my strings, and actor's other roles don't do that to me. Also PJ Flueger is the ONLY reason I still watch Chi PD. So. This is going to be my season. ;)

Now, why disappointed? Well, I wrote this post a while ago (before S11). In short, I really, REALLY wanted Adam to suffer a physical injury from the shooting, preferably one that would force him to work behind the desk. I would love a storyline that would tackle the physical, AND emotional consequences of the shooting.

From what we got in the first two episodes of S12 it's obvious they will only go for the emotional consequences of trauma, so I'm like... "we could have had it all".

Well.

Still, what we're going to have may be great anyway, right? They may still pull him through a wringer, they may still have him unable to do field duty and force him to work closer with Trudy.

Or they may do something I don't expect, that will meet my expectations (which are high, lol).

Or. They may recycle yet another time one of those old post-trauma storylines, that had been told over and over again. Whatever. Even if they do, my baby Paddy will blow it out of the park, that at least I am sure of.

It was a great season premiere, right? First Adam was staring down the barrell of a gun, and that was A Scene. I held my breath through it all. Then her and his new partner talked about how she watched her partner die, and then... that ending! I kind of knew she was a goner, considering how much spoilers were about that other actress joining the team and nothing about her. But still, the way it happended, and the look on Adam's face? Brilliant. (btw, I'm still bitter his near-death experience only had a one-episode consequences last season, but it was a weird season, so I can forgive it, if they dig into it now ;)

OH it really, really was !!

When we got Adam staring down the barrel of a gun, I was like damn this season is starting off HOT and I thought that would be the peak of the amazingness of the episode. But no... we had THAT ending as well which was just...so fucking good for an ending.

I too knew something would be up with her, depending we had heard nothing about her, but damn, I did not think death (my brain also did forget reading the press release for ep2, otherwise it probably would've lmao) but even if I did, it DEFINITELY did not think like that.

That was cold, shocking to the system in such a very real fashion and oh so devastating for our poor boy Adam.

I really loved how they managed to settle her in within the episode, establish enough backstory and connection (especially to Adam) AND weave in the foreshadowing with the near miss and the talk of her old partner enough to actually make the death hard hitting even though we, the audience, only just met her but without overdoing it and making the episode really clunky, especially as the connection establishment was the b plot to the voight a plot.

And YES I am also still salty his shooting only got briefly touched upon last season but I'm thinking we're going to get something like we got for Kim -- a season later and the long term consequences are showing up, and I'll be really interested in seeing how the situation affects Adam differently.

And I love how the premiere already touched upon the affect of seeing your partner shot, through Adam's facing the gun (which the way he squared up to it even though now he KNOWS what it's like to feel your life fading?? Oof) and him checking on Emily after and now we get to see that becoming Adam's reality, with an extra helping of guilt because he got her into intelligence.

I am a little sad we don't get any Kim during episode 2 to see her being there to be an emotional rock for Adam, even if it's in the background (likewise that we didn't get to get a quick few seconds scene of Kim checking if Adam was a-ok himself after facing the gun this episode) but I think it's pretty clear this will be, or will lead into, Adam's storyline angst this season so hopefully while we won't get her this episode, we will get her later.

(Plus we've seen in the past with Adam that when things like this happen, in the immediate aftermath he likes to throw himself all in and just rage and dwell in his guilt and feelings so I kinda like we'll get to just focus on him this episode feeling all that to really explore how it feels to have your partner shot in the head right next to you).

But I do hope we at least get a mention of Kim (like Kim being that emotional rock for him despite being apart; which she still is because she knows the first hours are just going to be so hectic for Adam and he can't rest until at least initial justice is served for Emily and he'd want her to finish off because she can do all she can from there (except physical intimacy but yes it's different but he DOES still have Kev, and Trudy (and Mack) so he's not going to be deprived of a hug if he so needs it and he's going to be around people he has and can cry around if needed) and her coming home early may just add an unnecessary burden of guilt onto him some more - because we know our boy can really feel that guilt when he gets rolling.

And it's almost more powerful seeing how deep and secure and just loving their relationship is now that they can be there for each other without being in physical proximity. That Kim trusts him to not completely spiral, that they have a support system, that Adam KNOWS he'll get love and affection from Kim just the same even if it's days after the initial trauma so it's not a take this now or not get it at all situation.

I mean, that is, if they have Kim stay at the conference. They could just end up making her get stuck on her way home which is fine I guess.

ANYWAY sorry this took literally a whole week to get around to, I wrote up most of this last week but life really has gotten ahold of me and I didn't have the energy to complete it and I really wanted to make this a detailed answer to you, not just an 'i agree'. Better late than never?

Thank you for asking!!! 💞💞💞

[kingkatsuki]

Have you seen this comic before? I’m not entirely sure if it’s canon or not, but it cracked me up

Katsuki can act judgy all he wants; all I can think of is the recent marriage talk on your blog here recently. Like Mitsuki seems to be more comfortable/confident when it comes to emotional intimacy with others but could you imagine?

Katsuki’s head over heels for you, and he finds out you feel the same way?

Just the overly aggressive flirting. Whether he’s actually all that good at it or not, whew…that passion has gotta be intense.

Apparently it was successful on our ass, because it’s like we blink and we’re walking down the aisle towards him. And he looks way too fuckin’ smug. Our 0 to 100 boy amirite? 🙄 Always determined to win, and that includes winning us.

(Probably super OOC but just the possibilities have me giggling.)

Yeah!! It’s an official Omake, I’m not sure if it’s from the character analysis book or the weekly manga chapters but I just love the way Bakugou is like “so you suck at saying no” because he’s constantly saying no to the Bakusquad and they never take it as an answer? 😂😭💕

But his mum literally aggressively flirted with his dad to get him to go out with her so I feel like you’re right Bakugou would totally do the same sort of thing when he’s sure that you’re the right one for him? Plus, he’s probably awful at flirting which just makes it all that much better. Like, just imagine he’s doing what he thinks as flirting but it just comes across so overly aggressive and hostile but in his head he thinks it’s working😭

But on the other hand I can also see Bakugou liking someone that does the same thing to him? Like overly assertive women? So when you go over to him and you ask him if he wants to go for coffee and his immediate answer is “no” you’re like “great! Lemme grab my purse” and he’s just sat there like confused and flustered while he waits, and he can’t stop his body from following you to the coffee shop and taking a seat.

[eolewyn1010]

Second part of disgruntled Dracula recapping / commenting for today. Shit's about to get gory.

Jack, Arthur and Quincey went home together last night and had themselves a nice, traumatized little threesome. Or at least I assume so because my queer dreams joke is the only way of keeping me involved. By midday, it's back to the fuckery. They're all appropriately clad in black and return to the cemetery with a little more resolve, repeating their spiel of letting themselves be locked in after a funeral. Lucy is sleeping in her coffin and GAWD I wish Jack would stop talking about her "voluptuous mouth". It was already annoying when Jonathan did that with Dracula; now it's grating. Van Helsing gets on with prep and explains the methods he's using to the dude squad; at least all the research trips have paid out. I'm not sure where in Eastern Europe the "nosferatu" bit comes from as Stoker doesn't care to specify because he doesn't do research; I'm pretty sure it isn't Romanian though.

According to van Helsing, the kids haven't been drained to the threshold of vampirism and will heal once Lucy is dead for good (and her soul "with the other Angels", wtf, Stoker? that purity complex tho), so hurry it is. Now. Wasn't two nights ago, amirite? And van Helsing, resident shithead, actually makes Arthur do the thing. And convinces him that he'll fondly remember mutilating his fiancée's corpse, because, after all, this gruesome act was rescuing her soul and therefore the violence can't cause anything but happy, joyful memories! Fuck van Helsing. And fuck Stoker. What kind of logic is that? As van Helsing reads out a prayer for the dead, Arthur stakes a screeching, writhing, blood-frothing Lucy. This is terrible. Arthur did not have to go through this. None of them did, save van Helsing. It does turn Lucy back into a normal human corpse, but God, this scene. Good that Jack and Quincey take care of Arthur afterwards because van Helsing basically just goes "told ya so!" Yeah, and then Arthur is allowed to kiss a body that has been dead for nine days and has in the meantime drunk human blood and been frothing from the mouth a minute ago. Yummy.

Then it's sawing off the stake while leaving the point of it inside Lucy's body, chopping off her head, filling her mouth with garlic, re-sealing the coffin. Whew, this was a ride. We could have done this way back the night after she died. All of nature rejoices at this lovely morning, aaannnnd van Helsing signs the dude squad up for more trauma; he wants them to join the Harker half of the polycule and also the hunt for Dracula. He actively pressures them. Cool. Mina has wired van Helsing who has to drive home once more Stoker's point that Mina is the only woman in this world worth a damn. Since I have revoked his blorbo status on my blog already anyway, he gets a new nickname as author's avatar: van Hellstoker. He also gets to boss Jack around (sleep? emotional recovery? who needs those?). Jack is to study Jonathan's transcribed diaries to know what they're getting into. But first, he picks up Mina from the railway station. She gets a bedroom and an office at the asylum prepared for her, how lovely! Jack does what van Hellstoker couldn't be arsed to with the dude squad: He worries about potentially traumatizing Mina. Here's to some more wholesome interaction.

[swiss-army-wifes]

SASHA EPISODE!!! Thank you dads

“You lock up my goddamn family.” 🥺 Juno has a FAMILY guys 🥺🥺🥺🥰

I refuse to believe Nureyev is betraying them, not after all this #NoBetrayev

“What’s a war crime between friends, amirite?” The US government lmao

SORRY IS MICK DEAD WHAT. “Anyone still alive”???

Juno saying “whatever” after agreeing to a very serious deal is. extremely funny to me. I love this lady so much.

Also, I appreciate that everyone knows how good of a detective he is.

“She is something else.” Yes ma’am that’s my milf (lovingly) 😍😍

Also Sasha is so smart I’m SORRY

“Police state looks good on the old girl, doesn’t it?” God, I’m gay for Buddy Aurinko

MRS!!!! MRS AURINKO!!!!!!

Okay buddy is stressed and it stresses ME out

The way Juno softens when he says “Is he okay?”

Juno Buddy favorite pair

“She says the booze ruins the taste.” rita, ma’am,,,, please make me a cocktail

The way Sasha strategizes and utilizes her own emotions only to make her a better weapon.... 😳

“Some people never change.” SIKE (I’m calling it). you don’t even know the half of his change 🥲 (I love you Juno Steel)

Juno knows them. I’m soft.

Juno working through his emotions about Sasha and the layers of their current dynamic out loud is making me feel some type of way. She might have become manipulative and untrusting, but he’s not and determined not to be.

The way he says “class x radical” I’m-

(Once again, I know she’s not a good person, but damn if she isn’t good at her job.)

“I’m trying to keep you alive.” “Yeah, okay that’s a decent reason.” The fact that Juno didn’t make a quip about not needing to stay alive... he sees the value in being kept alive... god

Is Nureyev the radical.

Sasha I do not trust you.

“I’m thinking I should have left you in desert where I found you.” FUCKING OW.

Yo, Juno what the fuck. Why are you pulling on their insecurities. Madam...

GOD I LOVE THIS CRIME FAMILY 💞💖💓💗💗💘

Damn, I’ve spent this entire season getting pissed when characters underestimate Juno but I literally did that. I. love. This. Crime. Family.

This conclusion is so satisfying.

JUNO THEME 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

“I am still his family.”

Oh god oh god oh god my heart

I’m just so *clenches teeth* proud of him. All of them.

To have an episode showing Juno’s growth by someone who has gone the opposite but parallel-ish direction of his path by someone who knows him... whew

In conclusion: I am having a lot of feelings. I am so happy he’s still alive and, in turn, I’m so happy you all are still alive. Thanks for being here on Earth (or Mars).

(Bonus: damien’s bubble butt I’m-)

[thefudge]

i'm sure you *loved* this episode lol amirite

oh you know it lol

i’ve seen two very dumb takes so far:

1. “guess you haven’t been paying attention sweatie ;) ;) dany’s *evilness* was set up all the way in season 1…but some of yall stan a white lady too hard” 

i would like to disabuse some folks of the notion that the rest of us were blind to dany’s evolution. we weren’t. the problem with this evolution was that it was handled poorly. very poorly. dany always “failed up” on the show, meaning that the show runners never let her dip her toe too much in being unlikable during her adventures in Essos. that moment when she comes out of a burning dothraki hut like some ethereal goddess? i remember rolling my eyes hard at the imagery back then but in the context of the show it was framed as absolutely awe-inspiring and heroic, while the dothraki men in question were portrayed as backward hicks who couldn’t appreciate Female Power™. was there a frisson of “uh-oh” in it? sure, but always back-pedaled by dany’s overall “good intentions”.

this has been the show’s agenda with dany since day one: little accountability, big wins, sweeping mythology. instead of letting this grandeur really get to dany’s head (as it kind of does in the books), they’ve always made her hyperaware of her power and have emphasized her “mercy” and “good heart”. hell, back in S7 this is one of the reasons jon “falls” for her. she seems much more than another conqueror. and she is. but the internal conflict between “targaryen and yet not like my ancestors” is/was never properly addressed. remember those couple of scenes in S5 where barristan tries to talk to her about her family? yeah…me too. 

SO. let’s recap. in order to get to 8x05, the writers needed WAY more build-up than “she burns the tarlys”. as late as 8x03 dany was charging into battle trying to save people. remember their initial plan was to wait for the NK. jon wants to “stop” her from going to save the fighters. let me repeat that: dany is the one who decides enough is enough, she is going to try and save the northerners even if the NK never shows up. jon is content to watch ppl die.  to go from this to what we saw in 8x05 is deeply flawed, amateurish writing. these putzes (d&d) were offered 10 episodes by HBO, at the very least, but they are clearly so fed up with this project they decided to streamline it. 

again, the problem was never dark!dany but d&d not being comfortable or competent enough to explore it believably. earlier seasons indulge in her triumphalism and bank on her unquestioned “humanity” to the detriment of her nosedive in season 8. in other words, d&d wanted to stretch her heroic status for as long as possible. the folks who are claiming “women can be villains too! uwu! this is feminism!” ignore the fact that d&d couldnt be arsed to build dany’s descent because they never really thought about her as a true female villain/antihero to be reckoned with. ALSO they really put their foot in it with missandei and rhaegal, because it painted dany as a woman who is lashing out out of pain, and the audience responded to that. like, they made it easy to root for her when we are supposed to see her hubris. she is supposed to tragically echo her father and viserys, but instead she resembles rhaegar fighting for the woman he loves (in this case missandei, and by extension all the ppl dany lost). i do think they’re still sticking with “dany’s story is a tragedy” from grrm’s outline but it’s just….a mess. i wouldn’t have minded an episode like this with proper build-up and with more interesting stakes. that moment where dany tells tyrion that the ppl of KL are to blame for “standing with cersei” does not gel with her attitude in the north. there should’ve been more time between her arc in the north and the one in KL. they should’ve cared more about this character. and i am a person who was never terribly invested in dany, though i followed her journey with interest, but am going to be no. 1 stan out of spite lol 

second take that’s very VERY dumb

2. “this isn’t misogyny. other female characters on the show had a tough life too! and didn’t lose their mind! look at sansa!”

have yall really forgotten that in 8x04 sansa literally told sandor that rape made her strong and that welp, i guess women need that shit in their life, otherwise they’ll never grow? Hardened Woman! Sansa Stark has managed to fool ppl into thinking she has been given dimension when in fact, a lot of her attitudes and goals from season 6 onward make little sense. 

other ppl gave yara as an example. yara who is so emotionally stunted on the show she has to treat theon with disgust and contempt because he doesn’t have the “balls”. yara/asha in the books is a tough cookie, sure, but she is allowed to show emotion and be a human being instead of a walking stereotype. 

other ppl gave lyanna mormont as an example. the “cute” no nonsense little girl who is tough as balls! what a badass! died like a bamf! what did we know about her? every single one of her scenes was her spouting some watered down version of “Grrrl Power” straight from d&d’s unread copy of “the female eunuch”. i distinctly recall her being part of a discussion where she scoffs at knitting socks as a war effort. she wants to fight! making sure ppl are clothed in winter is a joke!! girlie girls have cooties and any kind of “feminine” pursuit must be discredited. yes, what a feminist hero. 

let’s not even talk about arya-bot-9000. or brienne of tarth telling jaime he complains “like a woman” and on and on. 

all these women are Strong because they are basically Robots. 

the minor female characters who shine on this show do so because d&d haven’t bothered to give them any Cool Dudebro Lines. basically, they have been ignored, which was their saving grace. 

what i’m trying to say is ppl have to stop drinking the kool aid. 

you enjoyed the episode? fine. it’s a visual feast (although i think that so many panoramic set pieces drain the show and cheapen it, and also hide a lot of bad writing because hey, pretty spectacle!). you want to convince others this was masterful storytelling? or worse, you want to condescend and tell us we did not watch this show “right” and you know better? 

(also, istg i saw a “hot” take on quora about how viewers who don’t accept this piss-poor writing for dany are like “season 1!sansa” clinging naively to joffrey, unable to see the cracks below the surface. whew chille, people are really unleashing their inner dumbass.)

[dhajetii]

The Mandalorian Season Finale

MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW THE “ READ MORE”. My thoughts on the season finale of The Mandalorian. Reactions and comments as I went through the episode. But my overall spoiler-free evaluation: amazing, very pleased.

Onto the reactions! I also get pretty thirsty for a second.

Those two troopers in the beginning, just... LOL Troopers with bad and worse aim, fantastic.  And my favorite part of this scene: “he killed a guy for interrupting him so this could take a minute” Comic relief at the very beginning of an episode makes me nervous because it’s probably going to be all downhill from here. 

___ Badass nurse droid is badass. Taika Waititi FTW.

___ “The Mandalorians can help us escape” Yeah, but didn’t they all bug out after they exposed themselves when they helped you escape the last time? I don’t think he’ll find them.

___ Classic escape via sewer. Fails before it even starts. Glorious. 

___ I love Cara Dune. Please be my wife. 

___ *spits out my water* WAIT WHAT DID WE FINALLY GET HIS NAME??? *rewinds 10 seconds and turns on subtitles* Din Djarin, I love you. Please be my husband. 

___ “Reasonable negotiation,” more like aggressive negotiations amirite?

___ At least Moff Asshole is honest and fully embraced the fact that he’s an asshole. I appreciate that in a villain. “You can’t trust me. I will act in my own self-interest.”

___ Totes enough room in that cellar for young Din and his parents but okay. And oh, this is why he hates droids. They killed his family and his whole village. 

___ Violence happening all around, baby yoda laughs. 

___ YYAAASSS BADASS FIGHT SCENES

___ The episode went downhill for my emotions. I am not ready for this.  Damn your warriors death, Din Djarin. How about survival instead? A face reveal and a name reveal, Merry Christmas y’all. Also, thank you Badass Nurse for making him see sense and healing him. Best Nurse. 

___ Wait, what? Did all the mandos die??? Nope. No no no, I  do not accept this.  Whew, oh thank god, not *everyone* died. That was a very tense very awful two minutes. But, a lot of mandos still died and that’s very tragic and I’m still Not Okay. 

___ Din Djarin is a dad, the Forgemaster says so. Also, jetpack yay.

___ Down the river and across the planes to grandmas house we go. 

___ I really like this Forgemaster. She’s amazing, badass, showstopping, outstanding, terrific. Please marry me.

___ Sacrifices wreck me. I don’t like them. Do the harder thing and survive. Fuck its a dramatic sacrifice I’m really not okay. RIP Badass Nurse. 

___ “Baby, do the magic hand thing.” *baby Yoda simply waves* Me: *heart melts* magic hand thing

___ The Dad is strong with this one. THE BABY IS SO HAPPY TO BE IN HIS ARMS I CANT my heart is so full right now.

___ Of course Moff Asshole survived. Always confirm your kills. Always confirm the enemy died. Don’t assume. If characters could follow this simple rule the would save themselves so much trouble down the road. 

___ Very pleased that the story was left open for more seasons :D

[xkcorg-blog]

Brian’s Johto Jury Responses

Kendall

First off, I want to say thank you for not like shitting on me.  I really appreciate this approach to the game, and so yeah, thank you.

Okay, so I think ethics played a big part in my decision making, especially after the rat game I played in Malibu.  I think it’s very apparent that I am emotional, despite my attempt at being strategic.  My blow-up at the final 9 tribal council shows that I just can’t sit there and vote off people I grew close to.  It’s so hard for me to do.  Some people are like, “It’s just a game, take your feelings out of it,” but it’s SO hard to do.  Mitch and Duncan didn’t deserve that round, but it happened, and as it was happening, I just felt terrible about the whole situation, especially because they were going to be loyal to the end.  I did end up telling Duncan the plan like an hour or two before tribal, and that’s something I did a lot this game.  Some rounds, like the Jay vote for example, I couldn’t be like, “Oh, yea, I’m voting for you,” but when the votes were more simple, I was very upfront about what was happening.  Most of the votes weren’t simple, unfortunately, but... overall, I think ethics were a big part of my game.

I did betray my ethics at final 5 when I voted for Duncan, and I did go in-depth with the reasons for that in both my answers to Duncan and Mitch, however to quickly summarize it here, I did that simply because NO MATTER WHAT, Duncan was going home, and I just decided to rip the band-aid off.  I couldn’t tell him to his face because I just felt too bad doing what I was doing.

Rites of Passage… hm… Instead of the normal rites, I’m going to give everyone a gif of the Survivor they played as and the Pokemon they used because I really don’t know what to say about everyone that won’t be perceived as fake.  Also, sorry I’m so bad with Tumblr, so it’s all a bunch of links djkhsajkds.

Kendall

http://i.imgur.com/Wr4As.gif

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyc22cur1q1qd87hlo1_500.gif

Ash

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ntNwnP0GjVQ/Vk4UxWlIdzI/AAAAAAAAANo/kjtk7fRN0WU/s1600/stephen.gif

http://www.nerdsdoingstuff.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/ampharos2.gif

Jay

https://media.giphy.com/media/l0HlOx88CRG75o6ly/giphy.gif

https://archive-media.nyafuu.org/vp/image/1433/52/1433523977199.gif

Mitch

http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20140331195015/survivor-org/images/a/ad/89.gif

https://68.media.tumblr.com/356b33df92ab2f851dc0f103578fdb80/tumblr_nhmiimQnvp1rjenv2o1_500.gif

Jordan P.

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lj9usab2Rr1qay09m.gif

https://68.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lubv8yxBbv1qd87hlo1_500.gif

Karen

http://31.media.tumblr.com/582b5f8289ceb71d1c5fec79c55392db/tumblr_mput2uGllq1s70wqxo2_250.gif

https://media.giphy.com/media/mEvp544gdO4rC/giphy.gif

Isaac

http://i.imgur.com/ee2W6lz.gif

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/3c/54/ea/3c54eaca844201ef2a3c12db109387a1.gif

Duncan

https://u.cubeupload.com/caramoangifs/Qe39K4.gif

https://68.media.tumblr.com/94ab860b6fd513bf8b1ce1190eb65c53/tumblr_myfqaujUlo1qmd3sto1_500.gif

Jordan M.

http://i.imgur.com/AH2PYJr.gif

https://68.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lppxdvz5e81qcm0wfo1_500.gif

Anyways, thanks for your time, Kendall!

Ash

Thanks, Ash.

Jay

Hi, Jay.  It sucks that we barely talked in this game because after you hosted me in Lazio, I was super excited to see you in this game, but I guess since we only had one round together, there was nothing we could really do.

I think you should vote for me over Billy and Drew because I feel I had the best game.  Like I mentioned in another of my responses, I wasn’t the mastermind behind votes or the challenge god or whatever.  I didn’t have these cool powers because, frankly, the Pokemon system and I did NOT click.  Honestly, all of the cool fun things Billy and Drew did were something I was apart of.  I was in the know 100% of the time, even when I wasn’t working or talking to certain people.  I positioned myself as the weakest Hero link going into the merge so I could honestly squeeze through unnoticed.  I worked on strategy with Billy, and I had worked my ass off to save Duncan multiple times because I knew he was going to want me and him at the end.  I helped to expose certain people early on, like Jacob, who were telling me a lot of things that wouldn’t have worked in my game.  Even through the lies I had to tell, I always wanted to make sure I was on people’s good sides, too.  The blow-up at final 9 made it harder to do, and I was frequently brought up as a vote because I was against people.

I’m not here to claim my game was perfect and I was in charge or that I did anything alone.  Billy and Drew were both apart of a lot of things I did, too, they were just more vocal about it.  It painted targets on them and not on me, and that helped me to navigate the game.

This may be an inadequate strategy for you, but I respect that you are giving me the chance to explain to you.

Thanks, Jay!

Mitch

Hey, Mitch!  I just want to address your first little thing: communication is a two-way street, so don’t blame yourself for us not being that close.  I do understand my social game was lacking, and I just don’t want you to feel like you are to blame for our non-closeness.

Next, I’ll quickly discuss the Duncan situation at final 5.  At this point in the game, I knew I was making final 3.  The only one that never confirmed wanting me there was Jordan Means, but I knew all of the other Heroes wanted me there.  Duncan had stated that he didn’t care if he lost to me, but he wanted me at 3 and hopefully with him.  I had agreed to this because I had constantly been working my ass off to save Duncan from multiple potential vote-outs.  Come final 5, unless Duncan had won immunity, I knew he was going.  He had kept loyal to the Heroes, but both Drew and Billy wanted him out.  Means was going for Billy or me, so I had 2 options.  I either A) voted Duncan, making it a 3-1-1 vote or B) voted Means, making it a 2-2-1 vote with Duncan going home in a 2-1 revote.  Either way, Duncan was screwed, and so I felt the best strategic decision was to vote him off and keep the trust of Billy and Drew.  It was void of any emotion because had I been emotional, I would’ve done exactly what Billy did the two rounds prior (knowingly voted against someone else while another person is going home).  I do regret not facing Duncan with this situation prior, but I ultimately did what I did and can’t take it back now.

As for the more loaded question as to what my game was, I’ll try to summarize it up all short and sweet.  My game was strategic, but looking back, there were definitely hints of emotional gameplay in there (such as the final 9 blow up and then working to save Duncan each round).  Now how was I strategic?  Well, I wasn’t the mastermind behind votes, and I wasn’t the big macho man winning immunities or using powers to keep my allies in, but I kept my options more open.  I had kept Billy close knowing he would always want me around and we made many decisions together (which included many fights about keeping Duncan).  I had always tried to push to keep bigger threats around because I wanted to be in the merge as the “weakest link” of the Heroes.  You, Duncan, and Drew all posed physical threats and Billy was a strategic threat.  I had been apart of the know in every round because of my connections with certain people (namely Billy, but also Duncan and Jacob).  My one “emotional” move was also strategic (although some might consider it a blunder, I saw a lot of success in the move) as calling Billy and Drew out helped to cause multiple rifts within the game.  I do believe everyone takes some sort of emotional face in the game, but I ultimately think that my game was strategic.

Thanks, Mitch!

Jordan P.

Okay, whew.  Jordan Pines, I’m doing yours last (not that you’ll see it last lol) because save the best for last, amirite? :P

So, I’ve explained this a few times in other responses, but I will try and do it all again right here for you.

My game, although not as flashy or as strong as Billy’s or Drew’s, was the behind-the-scenes guy.  It had strategy, such as saving people that wanted me around like Duncan (kept the vote off of him for multiple rounds, informed him of this split vote between him and Mitch, and ultimately opting to vote him out at 5 because the vote wouldn’t have worked in my favor anyway and it was better to just rip the band-aid off), being a member in controlling alliances (not necessarily the brains of the operation, but it gave me a lot of information to work with every round and I used it to the best of my advantage), working hand-in-hand with Billy mainly (this helped me to get in many groups due to Billy’s more aggressive social/strategic game), and much more.

In the early portions of the game, I was developing relationships with people like Jacob who would tell me every thought in his mind and Duncan.  Billy didn’t trust Duncan, however I gave him the shot and it ultimately worked to my benefit.  Come merge, I was in both the Heroes alliance as well as the messy ass Karen-Isaac-Billy-Drew alliance.  I had multiple people that wanted to go to the end with me no matter what I did in the game (unless it was against them).  My approach to the game, while quiet, was the one that got me to the end without having to lie to everyone’s faces, and although it may not be the best one ever, I do feel like it is deserving of the title of Sole Survivor.

Thanks for your time, Jordan!

Also, I know I’m not good at sorting but you asked and shall receive.

Kendall - Loyal player.  Basically said, “It’s okay, guys, don’t worry,” when y’all when to tribal and seemed rather calm and collected with her jury speech, and so based on what little I know about Kendall, I’d say Hufflepuff.

Ash - I didn’t really get to know Ash but Hufflepuff?  Based on blog tbh.

Jay - Ravenclaw.  Another witty player, with the brains to back up his furry personality. ;)

Mitch - I think Mitch is a Hufflepuff.  A loyal soul till the end, I also think Mitch’s dedication and hard work are qualities fitting of a Hufflepuff title.

Jordan P. - Slytherin.  A very resourceful and determined yet cunning player.  I’d also like to think that you are very about self-preservation in games, and that’s also pretty Slytherin.

Karen - For some reason, I see Karen as a Ravenclaw.  I think that she’s a very intelligent and witty player, and I think she’s all about individuality and standing out.

Isaac - Slytherin, 100%.  Isaac is all about being cunning, and he’s got this antagonistic appeal to him.

Duncan - I think Duncan embodies Gryffindor.  He’s a brave soul who was willing to take a stand against whoever whenever, and he’s definitely a courageous fighter.

Jordan M. - I think Jordan is a Slytherin.  He’s got a silver tongue, and is a very cunning player, and he clearly was able to use his resources to his advantage as he was the final villain remaining.

Karen

Hi, Karen!  During the tribal that I exposed you and Isaac, I think I was more-so just kinda annoyed with Billy and Drew.  I had talked to Drew just a bit before tribal council and he seemed to understand that you and Isaac were sitting in a nice spot, but he was also thinking that there would be no better option.  Billy was out the latter half of the day, so we didn’t really talk much either.  I told the plan to Duncan just a bit before tribal.  As a result, I did expect to become more of a target tbh, but I also expected to become a ton closer to Duncan or Mitch (whoever stayed).  It wasn’t because I was like emotionally manipulating the situation because I was genuinely annoyed that Billy and Drew were taking you and Isaac all the way despite your threat level, but it was because I wanted to make sure that in the coming rounds, I still had someone on my side who wanted to work with me till the end, and I knew Drew and Billy would still have my back, but I wanted to make sure Duncan and Mitch did, too.

Thanks!

Isaac

Thanks, Isaac.

Duncan

“Brian, ill delete you from snapchat and continue to think of you as being someone who take vacancy 4 inches inside of billy’s rectum as well as someone who i could’ve always had the potential of being great friends with but turned out to just be another fake in the community. Like I know it’s just a game, but don’t pretend to be something you’re not. “

This is all so funny tbh.  Wanna know something funny, Duncan?  I was the only one that wanted to play with you till the end.  I always got yelled at because you became my Allison.

Context: Back in Malibu, I had both my best friend (Tyler F.) and Allison in the game.  I had fucked over Allison once prior, and I never wanted to do it again, so I did everything in my power to make sure Allison lasted as long as possible.  She ended up winning the game, and I’m so happy for her for doing so.

Billy and I had come into this game with this perception that you would be upset with us after Lazio, but I trusted you.  I put so much trust in you.  Every SINGLE time your name came up, I adjusted the vote in a different direction.  Like I said, Billy was the vocal one of the duo, and so whenever I worked to save you, he was the one spreading it around to people like Sara and Ash, who he had better relationships with.  Duncan, you were supposed to be the first boot, but everyone was so iffy about it, and I was SO vocal against it.  I didn’t want you going.  Billy was upset, but he went along with not voting for you.  Wanna know how many times this happened?  So many fucking times.  SO MANY.  You were constantly just someone we could get rid of, but I never wanted that.  You and I had grown so much, and I wasn’t letting go of you.  It might’ve been fucking up my game, but I fucking loved you to pieces.  This is the mess I tried avoiding but ended up getting trapped in again.

Duncan, you don’t have to vote for me, but just understand that throughout this ENTIRE game, I was always your biggest supporter.  I was ALWAYS the person pushing against a vote at you.  No matter what I did at final 5, though, you were going.  I should’ve talked to you first, I do agree, but the fact that you feel so hurt and betrayed by me after I threw away my game for you?  It’s a little sad.

Thanks.

Jordan M.

Hey, Jordan!  I think I need to clarify that I believe of the 3 in this tribal, my game was the most heroic.  You’re right to say that there definitely was some villain-y in my gameplay, especially after the Mitch vote, but I can name a heroic thing I believe I did throughout the entirety of my game and that was play a loyal game to my day 1’s.  I had been with Billy and Drew since day 1 of this game, and I knew they wanted to go far with me.  Despite our rocky relationship, especially after I called him out, Billy and I had promised each other final 2 and I had told him everything going on the game that I knew, as did he.  He always knew what I knew because I was loyal to him and I never considered cutting him because I had promised my loyalty and I wasn’t going back on that word.  The same occurred with Drew.  Duncan and Mitch both became later game allies, and so I do consider that a breach of my word and anti-heroic, but I specifically stayed true to the people I promised my allegiance to on day 1 above all else.

Thanks, all!  Time to go kick away the rest of my responsibilities like my iconic fave, Noctowl!