#where did you find the reference for the whale dick

[soleminisanction]

Issue 6 of "The Saga of the Super Sons" answers an important question: where the fuck has Dick been in this scenario?

Answer, apparently: At college.

Which is... where Bruce Junior is supposed to be. Bruce Junior, whose mother Bruce almost certainly met years after he took Dick in as a ward. Bruce Junior, who appears to be younger than Dick, but not by that much.

If you came at a Silver or Bronze Age writer with today's modern "but why is this character still 17" bullshit, I think they'd laugh directly in your face.

By the by, Dick is here because Bruce has been murdered.

I guess some things never change.

This does present an amusing comparison with the more modern takes on the subject like Prodigal/Knightfall, Gotham Knights (the game) and Battle for the Cowl, because here the boys treat Batman like something they expect to be left to one of them in Bruce's legal, actual will, like the one read out loud by his lawyer, implying the lawyer would be in on the whole secret identity thing.

When that obviously doesn't happen they come to an agreement to both... team up? But also compete? To find out who murdered Bruce, and whoever does the actual uncovering wins the cowl. This, for... reasons involves seal hunting in the Arctic and, ah... northern Native people. Which means a lot of use of a certain slur that all Natives in that biome used to (and still do) get lumped under, which I shall endeavor to write around but just know, there's a lot of it. Like, a lot. A loooooot.

Less awkwardly, check out what Dick Dillin apparently thought a killer whale looked like:

Hell, look at those mildly demonic black seals. I know this was pre-Internet dude but you could've gone to your local library. Or picked up a Seaworld ad.

Another thing that apparently never changes: Super-Sons comics insisting that only blood relatives count as "real" children.

To be fair, I wasn't actually expecting to see Dick referred to as Bruce's son at all in this. And Bruce Jr. is the only one who says this, and he's pretty consistently portrayed as the more immature and bratty one in this equation, so it doesn't really feel like the story is "agreeing" with him, it's just an interesting parallel.

Of course, because this is the 70s, they don't have any consideration for things like tactical costume changes or the realities of being mostly normal guys in the Arctic. So, though the boys arrive wearing sensible parkas, once they change into their superhero costumes Dick is just, snow shoeing through the tundra and water skiing behind a seal in his short sleeves and bare legs.

You'll probably be grateful to hear that the white industrial seal hunter is in fact the bad guy of this story -- this is actually one of the more cohesive stories in the saga so far in that regard. Simon Link was exploiting the land by killing too many seals, and then massacred part of the native village when they fought back trying to stop him, so this man Malook wanted to kill him. But, unable to find him and unable to get the white authorities to listen to him, he instead traveled to America to target his business partner, Bruce Wayne.

Bruce Junior is appalled by the accusations but, interestingly, Dick is willing to hear the guy out. When Link's crime is exposed (with the help of the Supers Senior and Junior, natch), he tries to escape across the ice.... disguised as a seal... aaaaand...

Huh. Okay then. Justice is served, I guess.

Oh also Bruce Senior's still alive.

I mean... good on you for realizing the need to make amends for funding exploitative colonialism, Brucie-boy, but did you have to do it in a way that put your son through the exact same trauma you went through? Complete with the murder mystery dinner theater death scene?

Not to mention your poor wife, do you know how much shit you two have put her through in the last however long it's been?? Junior faked his death complete with a full funeral in the first issue of the saga and now you're doing the same thing! If you actually did marry Talia she'll gut you both the next time she sees you and probably Dick too just because she's never liked him.

Anyway, for a parting shot, check out the image they used to advertise this story on the cover, it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Beware the Ominous Pixie Boot!

[raz-writes-the-thing]

Crimes of Essex Proportions (Broadchurch)

Alec Hardy x GN!Reader / requests are open and encouraged

Summary: Alec's stuck on his case. You just so happen to know exactly what he needs to know.

CW: murder investigation, body carving, Alec being tired as usual, reader knowing all the right things inexplicably

Broadchurch Tag List: @clarina04 @kaylinelizabeth4004 @yeethaw13 (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

___ ___ ___ ___ ___

“Alec, are you alright?” 

Your beloved DI is currently sitting at the kitchen table, head in his hands and papers strewn about haphazardly across every single surface in your kitchen (and the lounge room too). The man groans in deep frustration and when he finally pulls his head up from his hands, you have to refrain from giggling at the red marks across his face where his hands just were. 

“I just- I don��t ken what the fuck this means,” he replies, not really answering the question but also answering the question for you at the same time. A half-answer. Ah, not alright then, you gather. “I just hate bein’ stuck- I hate it.” 

You hum, taking a look over a sheaf of papers being weighed down by his ‘best boyfriend’ mug that he says he hates. He never uses a different one though, you’ve noticed. The papers are full of notes from the coroners. There are some pictures you probably didn’t need to see, but you’re immediately pulled in by the numbers carved on the corpse's chest. ‘203.’ Hmm, interesting. The rope tied around the bodies’ hands also piques your interest as well. You can’t be certain, but- it looks as though it has been woven by hand. 

“What don’t you get, sweetheart? Maybe I can help? I know I’m not supposed to, but- you know. Fresh pair of peepers, might be worth something.” 

Half of Alec’s face is smushed against his hand, and he pulls the spare seat out for you to sit down at the table with him. He fumbles around with some of the papers before showing you a slightly grainier picture of another body. 

“He was found in 2020- there was a- erm, number carved into the skin. Two-hundred- and a little wooden carvin’ of a whale. Cold case, the locals never solved it.” 

You look over the image. You know it’s not quite appropriate, but you kind of want that wooden whale. Oh, hang on. 

“That’s a sperm whale,” you say, brows furrowing as you pull the image closer to your face. “And- we don’t even really get those here in Broadchurch. Been a few sightings in Scotland, though.” 

Alec looks between you and the paper before he interrupts your rambling. 

“Hang on- do you- hang on, do some of these things make sense to y’er?” 

You blink, dragging your eyes away from the papers to look at your boyfriend. He’s looking at you expectantly, and your mouth opens and shuts a couple of times before you mutter out an- “erm- y-yes?” 

“Well, okay- so- here’s the thing,” you say, putting the pictures down and averting eye contact. “Oh, I don’t even know where to start. Okay, so, you know Moby Dick, right?” Alec nods, clearly not following you. 

“Well, it was based on this real whaleship called the Essex, and, erm- in 1820 they set sail on a whaling expedition,” you trail off, scratching at your forehead after noticing the look on Alec’s face. “This has a point, I swear- and 2020 was the, uh, the two hundredth anniversary of them setting sail. When did you find this new one?” 

You picked the newest victim’s image back up again- “And what’s this rope made from?” 

Alec shuffles through some notes before replying.

 

“Erm- newest victim was found… November twen’y by the beach,” he pushes his glasses back up his nose as he looks for the other requested information. “Twine was made from…. Hogs hair.” 

You scoff. Of course. This was just… there was no other way. It couldn’t be a reference to anything else. 

“One of the crew mates- Benjamin Lawrence, uh- well when they were sunk by the sperm whale and those that survived were stuck out at sea in their little bitty whaleboats- Benjamin used the time to make a thing of twine with his own hair. I think… just as something to do? I mean, they were stuck out there bobbing along for ninety-three days and eating each other when they started to pop off. What else did he have to do?” 

Alec was staring at you, unsure what to make of all this. You brandished the images in front of him. 

“See- look, ‘203’ carved into the skin for the anniversary, the hog hair hand-made twine, the date the body was found, the hand-carved sperm whale? Surely there couldn’t be another explanation for all this?” 

Alec looked unsure, but based on how he’d appeared when you came in earlier, this was the best lead they had. 

“I’d be looking at people with a really big interest in nautical stories. Maybe someone in the historical society? Oooh, I wonder if a distant descendant is living here somewhere from one of the eight survivors.” 

“How do y’ken this stuff?” He asked, noting some things down. “I mean- it’s not exactly a rivetin’ subject, is it?” 

You chewed on your bottom lip, admiring the images of the hand-made twine. 

“Oh, I dunno. I think it’s pretty interesting. A special interest of mine. I’m just… glad I channelled that into creative expression and not… murder.” 

“Well, yes, there is that,” Alec replied. He got up from his seat and pressed a hard kiss onto your forehead. “I still don’t ken how y’put all that t’gether,” he said in disbelief. 

“Could you, erm- would you mind comin’ into the station later, providin’ a statement f’er all this?”

You wiggle your eyebrows at him suggestively, delighting in the way he laughs. He almost sounds embarrassed. Almost. 

“You taking me in, officer? Hmm? Have I been naughty?” A flush creeps up his neck, and oh, isn’t that interesting. Hmm. You might have to see what that’s about later. Maybe he’d like it if you were a little naughty sometimes. “Course I will, love. Just let me know when. You can borrow my books too if you like. I have a few on the Essex.”

 

“That would be great,” he says, taking your hand and pressing a kiss to the skin. “We could leave now. Sooner we get this case sorted, sooner I’ll be able t’sleep again.” 

Makes sense. You peck him on the cheek, grab your coat and find your couple of books from the bookcase in the home office and meet him by the car. It’s crazy to think that your little special interest is helping out with a criminal investigation, but you were happy to help out in any way that you could. And like Alec said, the sooner this whole thing was solved, the sooner you’d get your boyfriend back. 

As expected, once all the connections were made between the Essex and the bodies, it didn’t take long for Alec and Ellie to solve the case. 

Another criminal behind bars, and a slightly easier sleep for Alec.

  And another year passes on the anniversary of the sinking of the whale ship Essex.

[sixminutestoriesblog]

Porphyrios

Since 2020 there have been over 400 run-ins with orca whales off the coast of Spain. So far, they've sunk at least three ships and damaged dozens more. A ship's skipper, Daniel Kriz, who has had the orcas damage rudders on two different boats he's been on, says they're getting better at it too.

“In 2020, the attack lasted almost an hour and was not as organized,” Kriz said. “This time we could hear them communicating under the boat. It only took about 10 to 15 minutes.”

Why are whales suddenly going after boats with such determination and for such a long span of time? Scientists are unsure, leaning between the whales retaliating for harm a ship did them previously or simply becoming brave enough in their curiosity to unintentionally damage ships. Perhaps I am a bit too influenced by stories I've read but I would tend to believe the orcas know exactly what they're doing.

I also know this isn't the first time a whale has attacked, or sunk, a ship.

Perhaps the most modern famous one is the sperm whale that sunk the whaling vessel Essex in 1820, an incident that inspired Herman Melville to write Moby Dick in 1851.

But we can go further back than that.

Much further.

Let's go back to sixth century Constantinople. According to Procopius, a historian of the time from Caesarea, a great whale, 45 feet (13.7 meters) long and fifteen feet (4.6 meters) wide haunted the Strait of Bosporus and the waters around it. This whale wasn't just there to sight-see either. The whale attacked and sank ships it came across.

The sailors of the time named the monster Porphyrios.

There's debate what the name was derived from (other than the gut kick reaction to shout 'oh shit!' the second you saw the whale hove into view) but most scholars think the whale's name came from prophyra which meant a deep, purple color. This could have been referring to the color of the whale's skin or perhaps imbuing it with some of the terrifying, regal nature that nobles of the time, the only ones allowed to wear the purple, implied. Whales weren't well known in that area of the world at that time and we have no way of knowing what kind of whale it was. Speculation based on size leads many to believe it was a lost sperm whale a long way from home but it might have also been a large orca. Iberian orcas hunt the Straight of Gibraltar, following the bluefine tuna every year and they're the ones responsible for the recent ship attacks off the coast of Spain of the past few years. It's not hard to imagine one of them wandering east, deeper into the Mediterranean Sea, instead of heading back north when the tuna left. And Porphyrios didn't just set up shop anywhere. He decided that the Strait of Bosporus was his new hunting ground.

Here's the thing. The Strait of Bosporus was the main trade route for that part of the world. Goods flowed down to the Black Sea, crept through the narrow Strait of Bosporus which let out into the Sea of Marmara. One more strait, this one the Dardanelles, where the city of ancient Troy once controlled all trade out of the East, and then it was out into the Aegean Sea and then on to the Mediterranean. Trade goods could pass by on land but it added both dangers and time to the business and, most importantly, took all that sweet, sweet toll to use their water passage right out of Constantinople's hands. Having what amounted to a sea monster living in their main money-maker and convincing merchants to find other ways to bypass the strait, and therefor the city sitting on the edge of it, was disastrous for a country that was trying to restore itself to its former glory. Emperor Justinian I, also known as the Great, put out a bounty on the monster's head and did everything in his power to encourage its capture or eradication.

The tools of whaling used centuries later to drive many whale populations to the brink of extinction however were unknown at the time. Porphyrios shrugged off the arrows and spears lobbed at it and went on sinking ships, sending simple fishing vessels to the bottom of the ocean just as steadily as it did merchant and war ships. There was even a story that Justinian's famous general, Belisarius, loaded a catapult onto a ship to hunt the deadly whale, though this seems to be just a story and one which also failed to killed the great monster of the strait.

Porphyrios becoming a terror that merchant captains probably saw in their nightmares even when they were on dry land. Long routes far out of the way were taken to avoid waters he swam in. There would be lulls. For unknown reasons, Porphyrios would disappear for long periods of time, lulling ship captains and their crews into thoughts that the monster had died. It never lasted though and for over fifty years, Porphyrios hunted the ships of the Bosporus and its surrounding waters, damaging some and sending many more to the bottom of the ocean.

Nothing lasts forever though. One day, the story goes, Porphyrios was chasing dolphins in the Black Sea and ran aground. Struggling to get back to deeper water, it only churned up the dirt, sinking itself more completely into the mud. Locals that lived nearby saw what was happening and ran out to kill the great beast but their axes did little damage against its tough hide. In the end, they lashed ropes to to the whale and, using horses and wagons, dragged its great bulk to higher ground. There they finally managed to kill the beast, eventually hacking it to bits and eating the pieces. Porphyrios, killer of men and sinker of ships, terror of the Bosporus, was no more.

It was the first recorded case of a whale attacking ships.

It hasn't been the last.

Perhaps the Iberian orca, social animals that can teach each other how to disable and sink ships, tell stories, late at night when they rest in the waters off the coast of Spain, with the bright lights from the shore twinkling above the water like electric stars. Perhaps they tell stories of an ancestor who hunted strange waters -

and taught the humans in their noisy ships above what real fear was.

[whaleweekly]

hi @lifbitch! you asked me about how i came up with the whale weekly schedule and i wanted to answer that with a post instead of a very long reply.

the schedule overall is supposed to mirror the pacing of events in the book, with installments being sent out in the time frame that ishmael is experiencing them. of course, moby isn't epistolary, so the dates are all approximated by me.

i did my best to find clues in the text that worked as reference points to tie various chapter groups together, which works especially well for the action-packed segments where melville is pretty specific about time of day and what's happening when. the best example is the very beginning of the book, where he specifies exactly how many days are passing in new bedford and nantucket.

that strategy is less effective for the metaphorical, tangent-y passages where ishmael is breaking from the plot to tell us about whale facts or how harpoons work or whatever, so the pacing with those is pretty random. overall i'm fitting it into a time frame of a year and 9 months*, which averages to about 6.5 chapters/month, so I'm also using that metric to inform the schedule.

lastly, some of my scheduling decisions are for ease of reading. i want to avoid flooding people's mailboxes with huge, intimidating installments whenever possible, so occasionally chapters are sent out of order or time spans in the book are bent one way or the other to accommodate that.

*originally i had a 3 year time frame, but i revised that when i started working on the schedule in more detail. it's still a guess, but that's my best approximation using location and seasonal clues.

hope this makes sense! trying to organize moby dick into a reasonable time frame has been a really fun (and strange) project so i'm happy to have the chance to talk about it.

[sshbpodcast]

Tough as a Tardigrade: Space-dwelling lifeforms in Star Trek

By Ames

Star Trek spends a lot of episodes going where no one has gone before (except where someone definitely already has), and that includes just floating around in the vastness of space itself. But time and again, we find creatures who can survive even out here in the void, who don’t need a ship, a suit, gravity, oxygen, air pressure, or really any resources at all. And also who can survive cosmic radiation and all the other death traps even the Enterprise has trouble dealing with.

These are some resilient critters, so this week A Star to Steer Her By is shining a spotlight on the extremophiles of the cosmos! From lowly amoebas to much bigger amoebas, space-dwelling lifeforms come in all shapes, sizes, and tangibilities. Prepare to spacewalk with us as you read on below or listen to our chatter on this week’s podcast episode (discussion starts at 1:29:44) as we befriend these noble creatures and run away from the scary ones.

[images © CBS/Paramount]

Spore flowers – “This Side of Paradise”

You almost miss this reference in an early episode of The Original Series, but it’s stated that the spores of the motivation-draining flowers traveled through space until they settled on paradise planet. Make them a mint julep for their tenacity!

Dikironium cloud creature – “Obsession”

Kirk’s white whale… er, cloud in “Obsession” definitely travels about through space on its own, even getting into the Enterprise itself through some duct or other. You may want to keep your hemoglobin to yourself if you come across this sucker.

Space amoeba – “The Immunity Syndrome”

We almost lose Spock to this massive version of a lowly single-celled organism, which drains the energy from the ship. Unlike the Moby Dick cloud above, this one seems to have a taste for Vulcans! Must be that tasty green blood.

Beta XII-A entity – “Day of the Dove”

The angry little pinwheel we meet on Beta XII-A also likes to flap around in space to follow the crew back to the Enterprise and piss everyone off. No really, all it wants to do is piss everyone off and feed off their hate. These things should get into politics.

Zetarians – “The Lights of Zetar”

Another flashy flashy light that follows people around through space, these colorful beings are just looking for a place to live… and that happens to be inside crewmen of the Enterprise. If they’d succeeded, they probably would have gone on our character possession list!

Matter-energy cloud – “One of Our Planets Is Missing”

I remember really liking this episode from The Animated Series, which is a rarity, because of the big sentient cloud that Spock gets to mindmeld reminding me of A Star to Steer Her By’s first fanfic day! And happily, both live on today!

Q – “Encounter at Farpoint” et al

When we first meet Q in the TNG premiere, he’s just a chain link fence in space. Shortly afterwards, we see him chase the ship as some kind of translucent ball. Basically, the Q are so powerful, they can exist wherever, whenever, and as whatever they want.

Space Jellyfish – “Encounter at Farpoint”

One of my personal favorites because of just how alien these things are. Kicking off The Next Generation with a pair of space jellyfish at the center of a mysterious test got things off to a great start. The rest of season one on the other hand…

Beta Renner cloud – “Lonely Among Us”

This highly forgettable episode did at least feature some interesting creatures who bring Picard’s essence with them to live in space and do whatever it is they like to do. It doesn’t last long, but it did happen.

Crystalline Entity – “Datalore” and “Silicon Avatar”

There are few creatures as spangly and stunning as the crystalline entity. Like all the pretty ones, it just happens to also like mass murder quite a bit, and also hanging out with psychopaths like Lore. Who can blame it though?

The Child – “The Child”

When Troi gets knocked up in the season two premiere of TNG, it’s by none other than some kind of space-dwelling light being. Little Ian Andrew just wants to learn more about the human race, from the inside out.

Nagilum – “Where Silence Has Lease”

In literally the next episode, yet another space-dwelling weirdo also wants to learn more about the human race, though this one is less innocent in how he goes about it. Let’s count how many different ways people can die. You know, for science!

Subatomic bacteria – “A Matter of Honor”

Our Benzite friend Mendon spots some subatomic bacteria on the hull of the Klingon vessel Pagh and doesn’t report it until another batch is found on the Enterprise. Who knows how many other infestations of this space-dwelling scum he hasn’t reported!?

Calamarain – “Deja Q”

Many of the lifeforms in space whom we meet are just incorporeal, and that includes the Calamarain who hold a grudge against Q for some infractions over the years. They nearly get their revenge in the brief time Q is human too.

Gomtuu – “Tin Man”

Megafauna in space is less common, but we do see some good ones. Like Gomtuu, a perfectly sentient creature living out the rest of his days with his Betazoid inhabitant. Sadly, it does seem that he may be the last of his kind.

Two-dimensional beings – “The Loss”

When Troi loses her empathic powers, she’s unable to sense the two-dimensional beings that the ship comes across. They’re a fairly interesting alien race, since you can’t even perceive the dimension they live in whether you’ve got a functioning empath or not!

Junior – “Galaxy’s Child”

Picard wasn’t the only one devastated to see the Enterprise accidentally kill a space-dwelling mega-ravioli since it was a very cool critter to meet. Luckily, her child, dubbed “Junior,” survives, just a little bit al dente.

Quantum singularity lifeforms – “Timescape”

The aliens we meet on the Romulan ship are so hardcore that they raise their young inside a singularity. And like a typical outlandish Romulan scheme, Romulan ships are so convoluted they’re powered by an artificial singularity. Talk about a Black Hole Son! (Rimshot.)

Wormhole aliens and pah-wraiths – Deep Space Nine

We move on to the space hoppers in Deep Space Nine, starting with the series-wide plotline of the prophets who live in the wormhole and the pah-wraiths who live in the firecaves. But when they’re summoned, they basically go where they want.

Vash’s artifact – “Q-Less”

Quark and Vash try to sell what turns out to be the egg of a creature from the Delta Quadrant. When it hatches, it’s incredibly beautiful, but I gotta admit I don’t know what I’d do either if a million bars of gold-pressed latinum were on the line.

Rumpelstiltskin, et al – “If Wishes Were Horses”

Boy did we (as usual, mostly I) not like this episode, and most of that has to do with how contradictory these aliens are. Like some of the previous instances of aliens learning how humans work, their agenda is convoluted at best and confounding at worst.

Changelings – “Chimera” et al

Since Changelings can form themselves as whatever they want, that includes beings and objects you can find in space. We specifically see Laas swimming through the void as some kind of space whale, but certainly other Changelings must do it too.

Nucleogenic cloud being – “The Cloud”

Let’s now visit some of our outside pets of the Delta Quadrant. Early in Voyager, we meet the titular Cloud being that the ship accidentally ends up inside, and learn that, if there’s a cute animal in danger, Janeway must save it!

Komar – “Cathexis”

Another incorporeal alien we also brought up in our character possessions discussion, the Komar also can live outside the ship in space somewhere. These parasites usually reside in a nebula until a tasty-looking snack like Tuvok happens along.

Space sperms – “Elogium”

While Kes is having a sexual awakening in this rather uncomfortable episode, the Voyager herself is trying her best not to have one with these space sperms that are in the middle of a mating frenzy. What’s a nice ship like you doing in a quadrant like this?

Matrix species – “Coda”

We don’t get a good look at this actual alien species other than in the guise of Janeway’s dad, but it is insinuated that their matrix dimension they are trying to lure her into is in some kind of ethereal space. Captain, don’t walk into the light!

Species 8472 – “Scorpion” and “Prey”

Species 8472 is truly alien in many ways, including all the places they’re able to live. Normally natives of fluidic space, they can also survive in the vacuum of space, as we see when they get onto the Voyager in “Prey.”

Bioplasmic organism – “Bliss”

Like Captain Kirk’s cloud in “Obsession,” the big space pitcher plant proves to be a white whale to our new friend Qatai. This thing is huge and actually impressive to see since its CGI holds up pretty well! That is, when you can see it for what it is of course.

Bevvox – “Think Tank”

A similar (though smaller?) example of a bioplasmic organism is Bevvox, who we can only assume is some kind of space brainbox. He floated around in space for millennia before having the bright idea to form the Think Tank of the episode of the same name.

Species GS84 – “Context Is for Kings”

We now jump straight into Discovery, and season 1 had a whole bunch of space-dwelling lifeforms to appreciate. In an almost throwaway scene, these little light leeches start draining the energy of the shuttle and get the pilot killed before the Discovery picks everyone else up.

Ripper – “The Butcher’s Knife Cares Not for the Lamb’s Cry” et al

The standout star of season 1 of Discovery, of course, is Ripper and I’ll not be hearing any arguments otherwise. This massive tardigrade, first thought to be a menace, turns out to be a great pilot before being freed from the slavery of the ship and straight into space to thrive.

Gormagander – “Magic to Make the Sanest Man Go Mad”

Unless you’re Jonah, you don’t typically travel via whale. Harcourt Mudd, however, travels in style inside an endangered Gormagander. The space cetacean is a beautiful creature, though it does make me wonder why whales have come up so much in this blogpost?

Ephraim – “Ephraim and Dot”

We see another tardigrade in one of the Short Treks, though this one is neither massive like Ripper nor microscopic like tardigrades we may find on Earth (or on the moon!). What Ephraim is is adorable and colorful, much like her entire animated episode!

Larval space creature – Lower Decks opening credits

Another animated lifeform we see out in space comes in Lower Decks. We’ve agreed that the opening title sequence of Star Trek’s comedy cartoon show has some of the best jokes of the whole series, and the big space bug sucking on the nacelle is one of them! Ha!

Verugament – “Grounded”

In the most recent season of Lower Decks, there’s a swarm of another space-dwelling organism, the verugament. And because it’s a silly jokey show, as soon as they come in contact with the Cerritos, it triggers a mating response and things get... squishy.

Murf – Prodigy

Last but certainly not least, we have everyone’s favorite mellanoid slime worm from Prodigy! Murf can survive pretty much anything! Little seems to be known about his species except that they will swoop in and save the day whenever called upon.

—

Come back inside before you get eaten by a space monster! As always, keep following this space for more great Trek topics, jetpack along with our watch through of Voyager on SoundCloud or your favorite podcasting application, tap the glass on our Facebook and Twitter pages, and save the space whales!

[thewildomega]

Second Chance Ch.13

The first thing you noticed as you came to was the strong scent of Edward. That cedar smell mixed with the saltiness of the sea and something that was all him. Parting your still heavy eyes you could make out his chest and neck, some golden strands of hair laying across his skin. There was only a little bit of early morning light but you glanced up to his face to see him still sleeping, his eyes closed and his face relaxed. Smiling at the handsome giant as the memories from last night flooded your mind you felt an immense warmth spread in your chest. He loved you, he had told you he loved you and you loved him. Blushing you let out a soft sigh before going to ease out of the bed, just now realizing you would have to crawl off the end or over top of him since the bed was against the wall on what was apparently your side. However you were quickly stopped when a strong arm pulled you back down. 

Humming he wrapped his arms around the woman and held her to his chest, turning back over to his side. "Too early to get up lass." he told her with his eyes still closed, his voice thick with sleep. 

"Don't you want breakfast?" smiling softly at how cuddly he was being. 

"Mmmmm. Rather have you here in my arms." 

Giggling you pushed your face into his chest and hugged him. With the sound of his strong heart and his soothing warmth you quickly felt yourself falling back asleep but shook your head some and moved to try and wiggle out of his arms, you had things to do today. Hearing a deep groan you sighed as he only tightened his arms, wrapping his legs around your own. "Ed I have to get up." 

"No." 

"I have to. I have to help Mrs. Gia organize her store." 

Lifting his lip he continued holding her, "Why?"

"Because she was telling me and Zella the other day how she hadn't done it in years and how it needed to be done, how she was dreading it because her back and knees ache so much afterwards." you explained. 

"Still doesn't explain why you have to do it." 

Turning him to his back you lifted your head to look down at him. "Because I don't mind and it's the right thing to do." 

Humming he looked up at her. "Old bat's back might not hurt so bad if she hadn't have chased me all over the island when I was little, beating me with the broom." 

Giggling you propped up on his wide chest and looked down at him. "I'm sure you deserved it." 

Tilting his head he smirked, "Probably, I put a skunk in her store once, place stunk for a week." 

"That's so mean." you laughed. 

Chuckling he smiled up at her bed hair and her sparkling eyes, her large smile. Keith had told him once at the bar how he was happy to see her smiling so much now, something apparently she had never done that much before he had showed up. She looked beautiful to him and a swell of pride came over him when he remembered last night. She loved him and he loved her. He had loved her for a while but it was nice to be able to tell her and know his feelings were reprocritated. "What's something bad you have done darling?" 

Humming you tried to think back. "When I was living with my grandparents they used to make fun of me for my hair not being as nice as their family's line so I poured out their shampoo and refilled the bottle up with Nair." Seeing his confusion on the product you grinned, "Hair remover." When his eyes went wide and he laughed you nodded, "Yea it was pretty bad, it didn't even all come off evenly it was like big patches for the both of them... my grandfather had this long goatee and yea that got it too." 

Laughing he smiled up at her. "Is Zella helping you as well?" he asked and saw her nod. "Do you know about what time you will be done?"

"Should be a little after lunch. Why?"

"No reason." he lied. 

"Your sons should be here by tonight shouldn't they?" 

"Yes." Humming he reached up to brush her hair back, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "I'm excited for them to meet you." 

"I'm excited too, a little nervous but excited." you admitted. 

"You don't need to be nervous, they will love you." Seeing her smile softly and look down he knew she still felt nervous and he understood, meeting new people made most people nervous but he also had a hunch she also felt that way because of her own insecurities.

"Maybe I'll just have to make pizza to win them over like I did Marco." you told him and heard him laugh. 

.......................................

Wiping the sweat from your brow you restacked the items on the now clean shelves. Once you were done you stood back and smiled, giving a firm nod. 

"It looks wonderful dear, thank you, both of you." Mrs. Gia spoke. 

Smiling you looked down to the elderly woman. "You're welcome. Glad to be able to help. If you ever need anything else just let me know." 

"Yes." Zella smiled, nodding as well.

Leaving the store you walked back beside Zella towards the market when she said she needed to pick up a few things. Talking about this and that you agreed on the both of you cooking for everyone tonight. Deciding on curry since it was rather easy and could be made into a large batch. You were just in the middle of going over the list with her when you felt a hand wrap around your waist. Startling a bit you snapped your eyes over to see Ed standing there smiling. 

"All done with the store?" he asked and saw both of the women nod. "Good. Mind if I take y/n away Zella dear?" he asked his daughter. 

Smiling Zella looked up to her father in law, "Not at all." 

"I'll be there to help you later okay." you told her and saw her smile and nod. 

Spinning her around he walked her towards the sea. 

"Where are we going?" you asked. 

"It's a secret lass." he told her with a smile, taking her hands and spinning her around to his back. 

Smiling as he carried you you kept your arms wrapped around his neck, his large, warm hands holding your thighs. "So what have you been up to all morning?"

"Helped Marco get things ready for when Izo, Vista and Jozu arrive." 

"Me and Zella are going to make curry for supper." you told him and heard him hum making you smile. You had quickly found out it was one of his favorite foods. 

"Sounds good darlin'." Coming up on the Whaleship he felt her head perk up some. "Hold on."

Tightening your hands you leaned closer into him as he jumped off the rocks and onto the deck of the ship. You still had no idea how he managed to jump so high, even being as large as he was. Once his feet were on the deck he swung you around to his front but didn't put you down. Now even with his eyes you smiled softly, a light blush coming to your face at the way he was looking at you. "You know, you keep carrying me around all the time and people will think I'm a cripple." you joked. 

"Let em' think whatever they want. I hold you because I'm afraid if I let go I'll wake up and you will have been nothing but a dream."

Hearing his sweet words made that fluttering in your chest increase tenfold and before you could think twice you were pressing a kiss to his cheek. Realizing what you had done you pulled away and kept your eyes from his. Swallowing hard you chanced a glance up to his face and saw he was still looking at you, his warm yellow eyes now softer if possible. "I won't disappear until you want me to." 

"That's never gonna happen." he assured her in a deep voice. Seeing her give him that gentle smile he sighed. Remembering what he had planned he carried her over to the middle of the deck and set her down but kept his hand on her back. 

Looking over the top deck of the ship you grinned then looked up at him. "So the Moby Dick was kinda like this one?"

Nodding he looked down to her at his side. "For the most part, the Moby Dick was larger and the whale on the front was white instead of blue. This one is also a paddleship where mine wasn't." Seeing her nod he took a deep breath as the memories came back to him, the memories of that day. When he heard her speaking he snapped out of his thoughts and looked down to see a look of concern on her beautiful face. 

"You okay?" you asked him, worried when he had zoned out and a darkness overcame his eyes. 

Taking a deep breath he nodded. "Just a lot of memories lass. Now what was it you asked before?"

Still looking at him for a moment you saw that light return and turned your eyes back to the ship. "I asked if most ships have the same layout?"

"Depends really, I've come across some that are completely different but all of mine mostly had the same." Glancing up to the deck and then back down to her he smiled, "Come on, I'll give you the tour." he told her and saw her smile. 

For the next hour he showed you around the ship. He took you all over the deck, telling you what each thing did before you both moved bellow deck. Seeing the cargo hold which you noted was full of barrels and wooden crates along with cloth bags you were walking around with him when something bumped your foot. Reaching down you picked it up and saw it was a coconut and grinned before holding out for him to take. 

"I told them boys to stop leaving shit out like that." he grumbled, finding the create with the coconuts in it and dropping it back inside. Turning back he saw her smiling and grinned. "What?"

"Nothing. You just... well you sound like a dad." you told him with a smile that grew hen you saw him blush lightly. Feeling his large hand come back to your back, taking up the whole lower half you walked with him towards another area. There was the brig which he told you mostly stayed empty.

"I used to lock the boys in there though if they started fussing too much, made em' stay in there until they sorted it out." he told her and heard her laugh.

The large room on the second deck held a mess hall where everyone ate, beside it being the kitchen. There was the crew quarters, a large room filled with bunkbeds and dressers. A floor that he referred to as the gun room, cannons and such lining the walls. Other rooms were here and there each having their own purpose until he opened the door to a room in the back of the ship...

"And this is the captain's quarters." opening the door and allowing her to step inside before he moved in behind her. He had already looked over the ship the week they had arrived back in his world so he knew everything was in order. 

Looking over the large room you saw a desk, a couch, a wardrobe and a large bed. They were all made of the same dark wood, the couch a deep blue color matching the bedding. It was all simple but nice. "Was your cabin like this as well?" you asked as you looked at everything, your eyes finding refuge on the wall that held many built in shelves lined with books and other things. 

"For the most part. Bed was a bit bigger and I had a little more things inside." he told her. Looking down at her he saw her eyes looking over it all, taking it in. When her eyes looked to the bookcase he saw delight fill them and grinned, he knew she loved books. Oddly though he noticed her stay right where she had been standing beside him and tilted his head. She had been the same way in his home, she never went out of her way to touch anything other than when she was straightening up. Now that he thought of it if someone was to go into his home they wouldn't even be able to tell she lived there. Did she not feel comfortable? He knew that she had never been welcome anywhere growing up and now that he thought back he realized she never called her own house, home. She had always referred to it as 'the house'. He didn't want her to feel like that with him. He wanted his home to be their home. He knew her well enough to know that he couldn't just tell her that though. Blinking he saw her still looking to the books and placed his hand on her back to give her a small push forward. 

Looking to him when he pushed you, you saw him with his head tilted forward a bit and a relaxed grin on his face. Turning back to the books you slowly walked over to them and read over the different colored spines. 

Seeing her so caught up with the books he chuckled softly and moved over to sit in the chair at the desk. Glancing over the paperwork there he was looking at the maps when he saw her out of the corner of his eye walking towards him. Seeing her holding a book he rose a brow, "What caught your attention darling?" 

 Walking over to him you held out the green book and went to tell him when you were lifted up and placed down on his lap. Feeling your cheeks and neck catch fire you raised your eyes to him and saw him just grinning like he was. Feeling a warmth in your pelvis you bit the inside of your lip. Swallowing thickly you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and looked down to the book, holding it out for him to take. 

"The history of the underwater world" he read aloud. This one wasn't his, must have been one of his sons'. Humming he held it back to her. "Fishman Island has a interesting history, should be a good read." 

"Fishman Island?"

"An island at the bottom of the sea, it's where the fishmen and mer race live." 

Smiling you took hold of the book but kept your eyes on him. "Mer race, like mermaids? Your son Namur is a fishman right? Have you ever ben there? What's it like?"

Chuckling at her interest he wrapped his arm around her, placing his hand on her hip and pulling her more into him. She had relaxed now, her eyes shining in excitement as she looked to him. "Yes lass, mermaid and fishmen alike live there. Namur is a whitetip shark fishman, all of them can be different types. Been there many times, in fact it used to be one of my territories..." 

.........................

Getting out plates and such you set the table, your hands shaking. Marco had went to meet his brothers at the port while Zella had went to make other arrangements. From what Marco had said he thought it would be best if he had a moment to talk to his brothers before he brought them over to see their alive father. So here you were trying to help get everything set up so all of you could have supper. Ed had went to take a shower after you had said you had everything under control. Truthfully you were still very nervous about meeting three more of his sons. Even more so now that the both of you had confessed your love to one another. You weren't sure if Marco knew yet, if Ed had told him anything but he had at least been able to meet you before hand. Ed had said that they would love you but he couldn't know for sure. If they didn't like you, you weren't sure what you would do. You would never make him choose between his family and you. No. If for some reason they didn't like you or you being here made things awkward then you would have no choice but to leave. Just the thought made your heart constrict painfully and your eyes water a little. Closing your eyes you took a deep breath, silently begging that they liked you. 

Quickly looking over everything you made sure everything was perfect before going back into the kitchen to wash up the few dishes. So caught up in your thoughts you didn't hear the door open or the voices before a very deep voice spoke, startling you and making your hands jerk, the knife you had been washing slicing open your palm. 

"Who the hell are you?" 

Snapping your eyes behind you to the opening you saw a group of men there, Edward's sons. Quickly grabbing the rag to wrap around your hand you clenched it in a tight fist and held it behind your back. Knowing them from the pictures you knew the tall one was Jozu, Izo was the one dressed in the kimono and vista had the curled mustache. Quickly noting that Marco wasn't with them nor Zella you looked to all of their confused and possibly angry faces. Instantly all of your self doubts came smashing back into your mind and you felt your heart hammer in your chest. 

"Who are you and what are you doing in our pop's house?" Jozu asked in a gruff voice. 

Swallowing hard you opened your mouth to speak when you were cut off, this time by Vista. 

"Jozu don't be so gruff with the young lady..."

"Shut it Vista. I want to know who she thinks she is making herself at home in our late father's house." 

"I agree I would like to know whos she is." Izo spoke. 

"Is this what Marco said he needed to speak to us about?"

"Maybe that's why he didn't want us coming in yet..."

Looking from one to the other as they spoke you licked your lips. 

"I don't care who she is I don't want her staying here." 

Curling up a bit you could feel your hands starting to shake again, it was what you were afraid of, they didn't like you. 

"What is your name?"

"Jozu you're scaring the poor girl."

"M...my name is..." you started in a whisper but were cut off again. 

"Speak up woman..."

"THAT IS ENOUGH!"

Snapping your eyes over to where the voice had come from behind them you saw Ed standing there. He stood tall, his large arms crossed over his wide chest that was bare per usual, his damp hair falling down his shoulders. He wore his tan pants with his scarf tied about his waste but his feet you noticed were bare. Looking back up to his face you saw his brows and lips set in a firm line. His yellow eyes were still warm but there was also this edge about them. He looked dangerous and you found yourself blushing as you realized the warmth settling in your pelvis. 

"P...pops?" The three said in unison, their voices breaking.

"I told you three to wait a damn minute!" Marco grumbled.

"That's not..."

"How..."

"No... no it can't be..."

"Maybe he's a zombie?"

"He can't be a zombie he's not even old anymore."

Hearing his sons all start conversating with themselves and then turning on Marco he rolled his eyes and looked back to see her still standing by the sink. She looked stiff and her eyes were focused on the floor. Taking a breath he walked across the room, past the men still bickering and over in front of her. Curling his finger under her chin he lifted her eyes to his. 

Slowly raising your eyes to his you took notice of the drops of water running from his hair. Seeing it go over his extremely toned chest you felt that warmth turn into a tingling that dropped between your thighs and swallowed hard. No. No, bad y/n. Meeting his yellow eyes you saw him simply stare at you for sometime, like he was reading you. Feeling his warm, calloused thumb brush your jaw and cheek you gave him a small grin. 

Returning her grin he moved his hand down to her lower back and stood beside her before looking back at his sons. "Are you all done then?" he asked them. When they all stopped and turned to look to him he saw Marco move to lean against the wall, Zella moving to stand beside him.

Relaxing a bit when Ed stood beside you, pulling you into his side some you moved your hands in front of you, glancing down to the towel and seeing the blood had thankfully not soaked through. Still holding it in your hand to hide your stupid injury you looked back to the group of men as Ed spoke.

Raising his chin he looked to each of their faces and smiled. "Now I am sure you all have plenty of questions that I will answer over supper. To answer your first question Jozu this here is my lass, her name is Y/n and she saved me." Feeling her eyes lift to his he rubbed her back with his thumb. 

[woozapooza]

Moby Dick 1998 reactions

Literally just the notes I took watching the 1998 Moby Dick miniseries. I enjoyed it a lot but I like the 2011 one better.

Elijah is pretty goofy here

Note to self--find video of Henry Thomas talking in his normal voice. Is he doing a weird accent for this role, or is that just how he talks? He sounds almost Irish. [BTW after I finished watching, I looked up a video of him talking in his normal voice and he does not sound weirdly Irish-tinged in real life, so I have no idea why he was talking like that in this adaptation.]

They shoehorn some narration from the book into Ishmael’s dialogue

Not sure if the problem is with the actor or the dialogue, but Henry Thomas’s performance is...rather stilted

Here, Ishmael has no nautical experience. 

“I fear I must make a confession. I used to be a schoolteacher.” HE SAYS THAT LIKE IT’S SO EMBARRASSING 

When Peleg says that Queequeg “doesn’t look like much of a Christian,” Ishmael fires back with “HE’S KILLED MORE WHALES THAN YOU CAN COUNT” and seriously looks like he’s about to punch Peleg until Queequeg puts his hand on his shoulder.

Queequeg is less worldly here than in the book. Ishmael takes him to church to teach him about the concepts of God and souls.

STARBUCK IS PLAYED BY BUFFALO BILL FROM THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS?!

Ishmael is so serious here

Stubb is perfect

Interesting that Ishmael is a brand-new sailor, but he already knows the song (shanty?) the other sailors are singing

The guy playing Flask could stand to rein it in a bit

Pip is younger than I imagined him. But then, I don’t think his age is specified in the book.

Ishmael’s hands are burned by the rope. Later, below decks, Queequeg patches them up :) 

One guy literally refers to Ishmael and Queequeg as “lovebirds” and another guy makes kissing noises at them

Those guys try (pathetically) to bully Queequeg. Ishmael says to Queequeg, sounding kind of ashamed, “You pagans should teach us Christians the art of kindness.” Queequeg reassures him that they (Q & I) are friends *emotional emoji*

This is so weird! There’s a scene where basically the whole crew converges on Ishmael and tells him scary whale facts while he looks terrified!

I feel like Ahab needs to have a beard. I forget if he has one in the book but he SHOULD.

Ted Levine has the absolute BEST judgmental face.

They keep the scene of Ahab throwing his pipe overboard!

Pip sounds like he’s from the Caribbean? Interesting. I looked up the actor and he’s from Wisconsin. 

Fedallah is east Asian instead of Parsi for some reason 

“There’s no savagery of beast that’s not infinitely outdone by that of man.” I love that they retain Ishmael’s bursts of human-phobia!

The little swing Captain Boomer uses to get to the Pequod looks like so much fun

After the encounter with the Samuel Enderby, Starbuck openly stands up to Ahab, but Ahab shuts him down. Then there’s a shot of Pip angrily throwing down his tambourine. I like that. It adds some depth to Pip.

Wait, Bulkington’s name is in the credits??? He’s here??? I looked up the guy who plays him and I don’t recognize him but apparently the character is here somewhere. 

The whale looks so silly

Pip is in Starbuck’s boat here, and the emphasis is on Starbuck, not Stubb, choosing not to bother helping him. That’s an odd choice. I like that Ishmael is trying to get Starbuck to go back for Pip. When the hunt is over, Starbuck proposes going back for him and Stubb argues against it. Now that I think about it, I kind of see what they were going for. Starbuck’s first priority is to get the job done and his second priority is morality. 

A SHARK ALMOST GETS PIP?! WHAT’S GOING ON

When the rescue boat approaches the Pequod, there’s a shot of Ishmael holding Pip in his arms <3

When Pip is lifted aboard, Stubb celebrates. Sir, kindly shut up. You were in favor of leaving him to die. Okay, to be fair, I guess the novel is coloring my view of the miniseries’ take on the character. Here, Stubb wasn’t the one who left him behind, that was Starbuck. Stubb just thought he was probably dead, which I guess is reasonable.

Out of nowhere (unless I’ve forgotten something), Bulkington is an actual character in Part 2.

I love the choice to literally film from Pip’s point of view to depict his terror and disorientation. 

I don’t love this portrayal of Queequeg, to be honest. He lacks subtlety.

Pip starts dressing up as Ahab. I’m trying very hard not to find this funny. I KNOW it’s serious. It just reminds me of when I was a kid and I would entertain my mom by putting on her hat and shoes.

Unlike in the book, here Pip doesn’t become...I don’t know the word for it. Disidentified with himself? He doesn’t talk about “Pip” in the third person or say that Pip is dead or missing.

I like that, unlike the 1956 and 2011 versions, this one is really making an effort to depict the bond that forms between Pip and Ahab. However, the fact that it only forms once Ahab sees Pip dressed up as him cheapens it a bit, I feel. 

Ooh, they have Queequeg stand up to Ahab! That’s a fun choice. 

Ishmael is very angry that everyone on the ship is going mad. 

Why do some of the actors pronounce Queequeg’s name “kee-quay”???

THEY HAVE QUEEQUEG DECLARE THAT THERE IS NO GOD ON THE PEQUOD AND THROW YOJO IN THE FIRE??? 

Starbuck catches Bulkington trying to jump ship and go home to his wife. Instead of trying to stop him, he gives him a letter to deliver to Mary. Bulkington suggests that Starbuck just come along with him, but Starbuck can’t bring himself to do that. That’s really interesting. I like that.

Starbuck comes into Ahab’s cabin, where Ahab and Pip are both asleep, and stands menacingly over Ahab. Maybe thinking murderous thoughts? I’m not sure, but DEFINITELY thinking malicious thoughts. But then he sees Ahab put his hand on top of Pip’s, and he softens. I love that.

Ahab takes the wheel in a storm. Major Flint vibes!

Patrick Stewart seems to be having a great time

I THINK QUEEQUEG JUST DECLARED AHAB HIS GOD? WTF 

Ishmael and Starbuck commiserate about how everyone else on this crew has lost their minds. In the book, Ishmael is clear about the fact that he was under Ahab’s spell just like the rest of the crew (minus Starbuck), but I guess they wanted to give him stuff to do in this adaptation aside from just being one of the crowd.

Whoa there is something weird going on between Starbuck and Ishmael. I’m starting to ship it, frankly. 

I don’t like what they did with the “let me gaze into a human eye” scene. In the book, it’s really moving. Here, Starbuck literally has a knife in his hand. Ahab puts his hand on Starbuck’s face and Starbuck looks extremely uncomfortable. However, as the interaction continues, you see Starbuck start to feel less murderous and try to reason with Ahab, so I guess that’s good. 

Oh snap! Starbuck holds the knife to Ahab’s chest...and then starts crying. And then voluntarily lowers the knife. This is wild. Ahab says “what have I done” and you get the sense that he’s on the verge of being persuaded...when the guy on the masthead spots the whale. 

I like that this version includes Fedallah at all but Kee Chan is simply not given a whole lot to work with. 

OH GOD QUEEQUEG GETS BADLY INJURED—I THINK HE SOMEHOW GETS HARPOONED?—AND HIS LAST WORD IS “ISHMAEL” AND THEN HE SINKS UNDER AND ISHMAEL SCREAMS AND DIVES AFTER HIM AND TRIES TO PULL HIM UP BUT QUEEQUEG SHAKES HIM OFF I’M GONNA DIE

AND THEN WHEN ISHMAEL RESURFACES HE SCREAMS AGAIN I AM DEVASTATED 

The cook and the carpenter are both trying to get the doubloon. Guys...priorities.

Starbuck is just hanging out inside the boat this whole time and then the whale rams into the boat and Starbuck and Pip both get overwhelmed by the water :(

As the carpenter dies, there’s a shot of the doubloon in his hand. I like that. 

As with the 2011 version, the “epilogue” feels a little rushed. I guess maybe it just doesn’t translate all that well to the screen. Oh well.

[imafrickinfox]

w. what did whales do

FINALLY SOMEONE ASKED

ALRIGHT HERE WE GO I HAVE PREPARED FOR THIS MOMENT FOR MONTHS (to write it on tumblr.... i’ve given many people irl this speech)

So we shall start with Pixar and their 5th animated film, Finding Nemo (2003), released exactly 11 months before my birth. Given my parents already had a two year old child (my older sister), naturally they purchased the film to entertain her. She loved it, because she loved ocean movies ever since she saw The Little Mermaid (1989), which is her all-time favorite movie to this day. It quickly became a family favorite because the it wasn’t a musical (the father hates musicals) and thus made a good alternative to The Little Mermaid (1989). Because my sister and I shared a bedroom as kids, I also grew up watching this movie. And Since she’s older, I had no choice in the matter.

If you don’t recall/have never seen the movie, there is one blue tang by the name of Dory, voiced by Ellen Degeneres, famous lesbian and host of The Ellen Degeneres Show. This character, among causing a spike of interest in a very venomous fish, is a dumbass. While lost in the depths of the open ocean, Dory and Marlin (the father of the titular character) see my worst fucking nightmare in the distance: the silhouette of wittle bitty fish- but oh wait, it’s actually A FUCKING BLUE WHALE FROM FAR AWAY.

Dory then claims that she can “speak whale”, and thus asks for directions. Being the dumbass she is, she proceeds to “speak whale,” in a scene which legitimately haunts me to this day, as the silhouette disappears. She then tries “different dialects” as Marlin tells her he’s gone and she offended him, also that she sounds like she’s speaking upset stomach. As this exchange goes on, we see the background get darker- as if the silhouette is behind them. It is. A faint whale song is heard. And it gets closer and louder and closer and louder until BAM! KRILL ARE SWIMMING FOR THEIR LIVES AS A HUGE WALL OF BALEEN SLOWLY GETS CLOSER TO MARLIN AND DORY (and the CAMERA) and they are swallowed into the gaping mouth of this monster. 

After this, they struggle to survive inside the whale’s mouth, at one point they hold on to the TASTE BUDS OF THE TONGUE TO AVOID BEING SWALLOWED. They have a heart-to-heart and then the whale blows them out of it’s blowhole right outside where they’re supposed to be. 

I DON’T CARE THAT THE WHALE WAS HELPFUL. THAT SHIT SCARED ME FOR LIFE. (no references were used for this summary of that scene. that is how scared i am by this fucking scene- it has ingrained itself into my memory.) 

Also in part Pinocchio made this fear worse, even though I didn’t watch it as much. (for those who don’t know- Pinocchio features Monstro, a whale that is literally the worst thing I’ve ever seen. I hate him and his stupid face, but at least he has teeth.)

Also wtf is up with baleen (the weird straw-like things that take the place of teeth in some whales)??? I know the filter feeder thing, but wtf??? I want to know what evolutionary chain did that. I would google it, but google gives you pictures and I like sleeping. Whale sharks are filter feeders and they just go :0 and just monch monch you know? WHY BALEEN WHY DO YOU EXIST!

Oh hey you know how big a blue whale is, right? NONONO YOU DON’T! It’s heart is the size of a small car. I can literally crawl through most of its major arteries. That’s not ok. AND YOU KNOW THE WORST PART???? A female blue whales vagina is so large that five GROWN MEN can lay across it. WHYYYYYYYYY

And whale skulls. No brain, just void.

So that’s mostly about humpbacks and blues, what about the toothy bois? Are they chill? No. Except sperm whales (even tho I hate their name) and smaller ones like belugas. ORCAS CAN SUCK MY DICK THOUGH. I saw a documentary (narrated by Sir David Attenborough, so you know it’s legit) that said that they literally play with their food. While it’s alive. Just tossin it like a fucking volleyball. THEY EAT SEALS. SEALS ARE BASICALLY CHUBBY OCEAN DOGS WTF SHAMOO?? 

tl;dr

Why do you need a tldr, do you not care about me and my STRUGGLES??? jk it’s cool just take my word for it.

So in conclusion, Finding Nemo fucked me up, whale anatomy is so fucking wack it gives me nightmares, i don’t respect orcas, and tag your whales, please. For my sake :)

Also I have no sources. Google it yourself, if I’m wrong, tell me. Whales stick suck ass though.

[randomoranges]

Over the summer, I watched Good Omens in Italian and made a post about it to compare and contrast

And then I did the same with French and FINALLY got around to make sense of my notes. Here they are, enjoy the laughs.

Good Omens in French is Bons Présages which is a literal translation.

French shows/movies/books always seem to do literal translations of things (see Harry Potter)

Crowley’s name goes from Rampant (something that CRAWls) to Rampa.

 God, although voiced by a female sounding actor, is referred as tout puissant (male) and not toutE puissantE (female)

 At least Crowley and Aziraphale use tu around each other instead of using the formal vous. (Listen, the number of shows/movies where 2 characters are friends, but because of the age dynamic they get downed to vous – it’s annoying. I’m glad 6000 yrs of friendship meant they could use tu.)

 Agnes Nutter’s last name is Barge

 The way Crowley greets Hastur and Ligur “hey salut les gars” it’s so casual lamao

 When they’re going through the deeds of the day Crowley goes on to say “oké vous allez adorer – j’ai fait bugger tous les réseaux” he sounds so pleased

 Ciao remains but (according to my old notes – I don’t remember but this is what I wrote like this summer) apparently they go on to say that it means poule (chicken) and not food (so the ciao –chow pun is lost)

 The person from hell who comes through on Crowley’s radio (I was never sure who that was supposed to be) but anyways, that person, they use darling and in French it was translated as mon choux, which is cute and also really funny.

 The Japanese bit was not translated (so it’s still Michael Sheen we hear say the one Japanese line)

 French also does not have another word for cookie (cookie and biscuit – which is funny because in French the word used for cookie is biscuit) ANYWAYS so Sister Mary L says cookie but with a French accent.

 Aziraphael sounds like Azirafal.

 When Aziraphale asks Crowley what he wants to do next (or whatever the line was) and Crowley goes des litres, des fleuves, des océans d’alcool (litres, rivers, oceans of alcool)

 The drunk scene deserves a special mention

 Personal opinion: but Crowley’s VA grows more on you than Aziraphale’s VA. They both sound much younger than D. Tennant and M. Sheen. Sometimes the French VAs don’t... fit lol and fall a bit flat.

 Éternitéééééééééé

 Aziraphale’s “oh doux Jésus”

 Their voices as Nanny and brother Francis were sad.

 Warlock’s voice at age 5 was also sad.

 However warlock calls Nanny “Nounou” and that’s cute

 When Nanny sings the lullaby in French – bless them they tried lamao

 When Aziraphale does the practice magic trick to Crowley, Crowley goes on to complain and say “c’est toi que j’vais faire disparaître” and it’s a gem

 JEANNOT LE LAPIN BLANC (when Aziraphale presents his white rabbit) it’s a Gift.

 The Them = les Eux

 In her cottage = dans son cottage (did you even try)

 When God asks Aziraphale for the sword and Aziraphale describes it as it’s “machin coupant très aiguisé”

 Aziraphale uses vous for God, but God uses tu.

 John and Virtue Device à John et Virtue Bidule (another one of those literal translations.)

 Ok but this one annoyed me. Anathema’s name got changed to Anatheme and like sometimes I get it it’s cause of the way words are pronounced so when you dub you gotta find things that fit the movement of the lips as much as but Anatheme does NOT fit with Anathema. ALSO IT’S THE PERSON’S NAME. LIKE. (Re: see Harry Potter again.) aNYWAys.

 Dick Turpin gets changed to Jesse Janes ????

 Grow better is “et vous les filles, continuer de POUSSER” (so the plants get referred to as “girls”)

 Mme. Tracy’s line about the refined gentlemen (or whatever it is) is aux gentlemen avertis.

 Du beebop.

 When they return to the convent Crowley says “j’me demande où sont passés les nuns” he could have sais soeurs insteand of nuns.

 Aziraphale tells Crowley “tu es un gentil garçon » (you are a nice boy)

 Oh lord heal this bike à oh seigneur, réparez ce vélo

 Angel is sometimes mon ange and I’m die. (My angel.)

 The scene in Rome when Crowley asks “qu’est-ce que vous avez à boire?” He sounds So Done

 My dear fellow = mais mon cher camarade (my dear comrade lol)

 When they’re complaining about horses during the Shakespeare scene = oh aye aye les chevaux ça fait mal aux fesses

 Headquarters = maison mère

 The whole Bastille scene with the Jean Claude is lost because they’re already talking French

 Another transformation of angel is angelot (small angel)

 The description of the head cutting machine is une énorme machine coupeuse de têtes

 Pear shapped = boudain (really not the same thing.)  

 Obviously = manifestement

 During the Blitz scene, when Aziraphale is Super Proud he double crossed the Germans he goes on saying “vous vous petes faites pigeonner! Allez, hop, hop, hop”

 The German bit was kept as is

 When Crowley is tap dancing through the church, the French VA makes some key noises

 You go too fast for me = Tu roules trop vite pour moi (two things; the delivery of the line falls flat and tu roules is literally a driving reference so it’s like more car feeling than like moving in life)

 When Anathema offers the Them lemonade they translated it to citronade, instead of limonade. And I don’t get it.

 Wicked = mortel (Deadly)

When Shadwell mimics Aziraphale’s pip pip it’s something along the lines of hop hop hop espèce de tonton Suisse ????? I’m never sure what he says, but just – it’s a riot.

 I don’t even like you = je ne t’appréci même pas (I don’t appreciate you)

But then Crowley’s you dooo is tu m’adores which, is you adore me and I lost it.

 I’m soft = je ne suis pas un guerrier (I am not a warrior) and wow, okay, not the same, not the same impact. 0/10

 Michael sounds more like Mi-ka-el and meh ok.

 When Crowley talks to God when he’s having a minor existential crisis it – doesn’t deliver as much.

 Adam uses vous for Anathema

 When Pepper realises whales have got the good life she says “oh purée, j’ai trop envie d’être une baleine” (France French expressions are sometimes a whole riot on their own)

 Avocado was changed to amandes (almonds and I don’t know why)

 One big avocado = ce sera bientôt la fin des amandes (it’ll soon be the end of the almonds) re : ??

 You smell like poo = vous sentez vraiment la merde

 Crowley’s I’ve got an old friend here = tu tombes mal, j’ai d’la visite (I’ve got visit)

 Uriel tells Aziraphale “ton p’tit copain aux lunettes fumées” which is your little boyfriend with the dark sunglasses lamao

 Bandes de..... méchants anges! = you bad angels! It sounds more petulant though.

 The whole wrong shop allusion is lost in translation

 You stupid man = espèce de crétin

 Oh fuck = oh merde (really not the same intensity lol)

 The emotion and distress in the dire scene is l o s t . L

 When Crowley is in the bar and he asks for another bottle he asks for la p’tite soeur which means the little sister.

 When Crowley is like Aziraphale is that really you (when his ghost-spirit-nebulous appearance shows up in the bar) it sounds more disbelieving? But like in a what the hell is going on and less in awe/relief??

 Get a wiggle on = remuage des fesses (fesses is butt)

 Pollution sounds very young.

 The 3 other horse people use vous for death

 They had the French VA of Aziraphale say the spreichen ze deutsch bit and He Tried.

 Wahoo = woow

 Not just the southern pansy, THE southern pansy bit = pas simplement une tantouze sudiste, mon chéri, je suis LA tantouze sudiste

A)     He sounds so very pleased with himself

B)      And flirty?? Come hither??

C)      It’s perf

D)     Tantouze sudiste = a vulgar term for a homosexual man

 Shadwell uses vous for Mme. Tracy

 Cowwley = Rampra (when Lisa the insurance girl calls)

 Car = caisse

 When Adam yells his life to get evil out of him or whatever, in the flashback sequence when Ms. Young speaks to Adam when he was born, she speaks to him in French (not like in the Italian version where they just – did not translate that bit.)

 Crowley sounds very suave when he tells Aziraphale in Mme. Tracy’s body that he’ll take care of it when the military dude won’t let them through.

 Dagon à je suis présent not présente (so Dagon uses male words?? pronouns??)

 You were a good car – t’étais une caisse d’enfer

 Kick/lick some serious butt à brouter quelques derrières

 When Aziraphale tells Crowley they should wait before offing Adam the exchange is hilarious

It’s Aziraphale: Peut-être qu’on devrait attendre (maybe we should wait)

Crowley : Qu’il ait le droit de vote? (That he could vote?)

 Vous vous êtes rien vous êtes trop naz, Pepper

 I believe in peace, bitch à Moi je crois en la paix pétasse LOL

 They only buzzed Beelzeebub’s voice for their last line before Satan appears

 Crowley at Adam ok mon garçon

 Adam uses vous for Satan his dad, but then uses tu for him for t’es pas mon père lol

 Le truc cest que tas pu dcamp mon vieux – moi non plus dailleurs

 Their voices when they’re pretending to be each other

 Tickity boo à tout va très bien

 Je te rappelle que je suis un putain d’archange (I’m the archangel fucking Gabriel – or whatever that line was lol)

 Shut your stupid mouth and die already à Tu vas te la fermer ta grande bouche et te décider à mourir

 Beelzebu : il est revenu à ses origines – il a changé de bord instead of he’s gone native

 Miiichael mon pot, tu m’fais un p’tit miracle j’ai pas de serviette à When Aziraphael as Crowley asks Michael for a towel.

[apicturewithasmile]

Fishful Thinking

or: What the hell is up with all those fish references?

As I was working on two gif sets (1, 2) showing all (or at least most) of the times Red talks about fish in one way or another, I couldn’t help but wonder if there’s some pattern to these stories. I decided to sort the fish references into the four following categories and put my literary analysis degree to good use

Category 1: There’s always a bigger fish.

Category 2: self-recognition through the fish

Category 3: Beware The Fish!

Category 4: Is this the real life, is this just fanta-sea?

Though some fish references could be put in more than one category, I chose to sort them according to how I’d like to interprete their relevance to the show and Red’s character. Because of the vast amount of fish stories and references throughout the years I cannot possibly talk about all of them but I will still list them all under their respective category for the sake of completeness.

All of that under the cut because it’s long (sorry @ mobile users):

Category 1: There’s always a bigger fish.

1x01 Pilot Red: Zamani was a small fish. I’m Ahab. And if you want the whales on my list, you have to play by my rules.

3x11 Gregory Devry Red: I don’t know. What I do know is if he’s called a meeting and the members are gathering, he’s a very big fish. […] Follow this fish, and you can net the entire school.

5x13 The Invisible Hand Big Willie: Nash? Come on, man. You want to go up against those guys? You’re a big enough fish? Why risk that? | Red: I’m not a big fish, William. I’m Moby Dick.

The first of many fish references happens no sooner than in the Pilot (1x01) itself. Red calls his first Blacklister Ranko Zamani “a small fish” – as opposed to the “whales” he offers up to the FBI in exchange for immunity. Interesting in this scene is that Red refers to himself as “Ahab”, the Captain from H. Melville’s novel Moby Dick. In the book, Ahab is driven by his manic – and subsequently fatal – desire to hunt and kill the big white whale named Moby Dick. In the end this venture costs Ahab his life as well as the lives of all but one of his crew members.

When looking at this scene separately from the rest of the show it’s easy to think of it as ~just a TV show pilot giving us an easy way to characterise their protagonist – and yes, partially that is a purpose this scene serves (note it’s also the scene in which Red gives the show its name, referring directly to his list as “The Blacklist”). However, if we take into account what happens as the show progresses, even just in season 1, the Ahab-reference gains a little more weight, as Red’s “whale hunt” nearly gets him killed (1x10) while also leading to the death of two of his team members, Luli Zeng (1x09) and Newton Philips (1x11), as well as the murder of Task Force member Meera Malik (1x22). All of that for the hunt after the first season’s big fish and main antagonist Berlin, along with (as we will later learn) the undeniably even bigger fish: The Cabal.

Juxtaposing the Ahab-reference is Red’s remark from the episode The Invisible Hand (5x13) where he refers to himself as “Moby Dick” instead of Ahab. On one hand this serves the technical purpose to remind Red’s scene partner (and us, the audience) that Red isn’t just any fish – big or small – in the large tank full of criminals. No, he is in fact the biggest of them all, a legend and he will bring everyone down who tries to harm him. On the other hand it offers up an interpretation of Red knowing that his project – The Blacklist – will inevitably be his own downfall. He is both the hunter and the beast which means the question is less “who will win in the end?” rather than “is there any way out of this other than through his own death?”. This also ties in with the speculations amongst fans that Red himself will turn out to be the No. 1 on the Blacklist as the series comes to an end.

The third and final fish reference in this category is in the episode Gregory Devry (3x11) where the episode’s Blacklister gets called a “big fish” by Red. It’s possible to just brush that off as a somewhat common allegory to think of criminals as big/small fish but I find it noteworthy that it just so happens to be used for the Blacklister who claims to be the ~real Raymond Reddington. Describing Devry as a “big fish” also puts that label on Red by extension. And following ~our big fish Red also leads to the netting of an entire school of criminals aka The Blacklist.

*****

Category 2: self-recognition through the fish

1x21 Berlin Red: I was once on the island of Ko Ri, free-diving in the Andaman Sea. I felt terribly ill stung by a lionfish. I was dehydrated, in excruciating pain. I had lost all sense of time and place. I was completely disoriented. But I knew I was dying, so I readied myself for it. And in that moment, at death’s door, I looked up, and standing over me in the brightness was this landless Moken sea gypsy just standing there, smiling. She and her tribe nursed me back to health, good as new. And when I left the island she kissed me. It was like a burst of sunlight on my cheek. It was – It made nearly dying well worth it. That’s how I feel now.

2x09 Luther Braxton Red: In Mexico, there are these fish that have colonized the freshwater caves along Sierra del Abra.They were lost. They found themselves living in complete darkness. But they didn’t die. Instead, they thrived. They adapted. They lost their pigmentation, their sight, eventually even their eyes. With survival, they became hideous. I’ve rarely thought about what I once was. But I wonder if a ray of light were to make it into the cave, would I be able to see it? Or feel it? Would I gravitate to its warmth? And if I did, would I become less hideous?

4x12 Natalie Luca Red: Losing someone we love is painful. Agonizing even unto death. The Japanese call it tako-tsubo – a grieving surge of abnormal electrical waves that causes the heart to deflate and contort until it resembles a a fishing pot. Hollow and cold, an empty vessel at the bottom of a fathomless sea. I’m sorry for your loss. You have suffered enough of that in your life.

In this category I have grouped together instances in which fish-metaphors or fish-related stories are used to express Red’s inner conflict.

First I want to focus on the two monologues from seasons 1 and 2 as they complement each other very well and can be discussed together. The scenes not only share textual but also structural similarities: both of these monologues are spoken by Red to Lizzy in situations where he or both of them are in a dangerous and/or threatening situation; and they are both part of a season and mid-season finale respectively, which often are episodes with greater exploration of character motivation and inner conflict than there would be time for in a regular episode.

The hideous fish monologue in Luther Braxton (2x09) has been subject of great in-depth discussion in the fandom time and again; especially the Lizzington shippers keep coming back to it, as he is clearly talking about Lizzy when he mentions the “ray of light” and ends with explaining that he didn’t want her to follow him because it would put her in danger. [Sidenote: Anyone who still doubts that he was talking about Lizzy being his “ray of light”, I’d like to direct towards the episode Karakurt 2x21 in which Red invents an alias for Lizzy: “Ginger Lumiere” which literally translates to “Red Light”.]

You can also find a light-reference in the fish story from Berlin (1x21) when Red says “[…] she kissed me. It was like a burst of sunlight on my cheek. [...] It made nearly dying well worth it. That’s how I feel now.” as he is looking up at Lizzy, essentially telling her that despite all the pain and hardships he has gone through and will be facing in the future – it’s worth it because of her. With those two fish stories combined he paints us a pretty cohesive image of how he views himself – the hideous fish who adapted to the darkness that surrounds him and thrives in it; and what Lizzy is to him – a burst of sunlight, the warmth that could have the power to make him less hideous, and arguably even the sea gypsy nursing him back to health.

Interestingly the fish that stung him in his 1x21 story is a lionfish. I’m pointing that out because that same species will get mentioned again in season 4, so I will come back to that when talking about the next category.

In Natalie Luca (4x12) he talks to the young woman who has just lost her boyfriend and it’s evident that he’s not only talking about her loss but also about his recent experience of losing someone he loved – namely when he thought Lizzy had died after giving birth to Agnes. On a textual basis it seems like he’s just talking about Natalie but the camera is positioned in such a way that Natalie’s image is reflected in the window behind which Red sits, effectively merging the two characters together, making it clear that when he’s talking about her, he’s also talking about himself. Thus it is reasonable to assume Red is empathising with Natalie on the basis of grieving their romantic love interest (despite Lizzy having come back from the dead in the meantime, Red is still struggling with the pain Lizzy’s actions have caused him). He then describes Natalie’s and his pain as the heart resembling “a fishing pot. Hollow and cold, an empty vessel at the bottom of a fathomless sea.” Red feels like he has lost his “ray of light” and thus his heart has dropped to the bottom of the sea, into even deeper darkness than ever before, causing him to make decisions as hideous as shooting Kate Kaplan.

On a sidenote, the scene in which Natalie Luca’s boyfriend dies parallels Lizzy’s (fake) death scene very well in terms of camera angles and movements – Natalie being the stand-in for Red; the boyfriend being stand-in for Lizzy.

*****

Category 3: Beware The Fish!

3x15 Drexel Red: Right. Which is why we’re here now. We’ve come for the fugu kimo. | Dembe: Fugu kimo? | Red: Blowfish liver. Contains a poison 1,200 times deadlier than cyanide– so lethal, a single fish can kill 30 grown men.

4x05 The Lindquist Concern Red: Perhaps another go with the candiru fish. I understand they burrow into the most impossible nooks and crannies.

4x07 Dr. Adrian Shaw Red: Have you ever been spearfishing? You should go spearfishing. I love spearfishing. On the Ambergris Caye, there is a reef– | Liz: If there’s a reason you felt this story couldn’t wait, I’d love to hear it, but quickly if possible. | Red: I have a Blacklister for you. They call him The Coroner. | Liz: I just got my baby back, my husband, my family. This can wait. | Red: Lionfish. | Liz: Lionfish? | Red: An aggressive, invasive species threatens the local habitat, leaves destruction in its wake. Sound like anyone we know?

These three make up the group of fish as some form of a danger. Here we see fish used as a torture device by creative torture expert Brimley in 4x05 and mentioned in the form of a potentially lethal meal in 3x15.

The most interesting reference in this category though is the one from Dr. Adrian Shaw (4x07) because as I’ve pointed out above the lionfish which has first been mentioned in 1x21 makes another appearance here. 4x07 is the first part of the mid-season finale and in the beginning of the episode Red makes a point of equating Kirk to the invasive, aggressive and destructive nature of lionfish.

In the second part of this mid-season finale Red will then be tortured and almost killed by Alexander Kirk – a man who believes himself to be Lizzy’s father. In his attempt to get revenge and compensation for the years Kirk has lost with his (thought-to-be) daughter he goes to great and often violent lengths. This culminates in Kirk ~becoming the lionfish from Red’s season 1 story. Kirk injects Red with multiple substances that all build up to Red being in “excruciating pain. [losing] all sense of time and place” and being “completely disoriented.” just like in his story from 1x21. This then leads to Red saying whatever he thinks Kirk wants to hear in order to survive. The result is a (false) confession that Red is Lizzy’s father as well as some (yet-to-be-revealed?) secret whispered into Kirk’s ear which eventually convinces him to let Red walk free. The next time we see Red, he shows up at Lizzy’s doorstep, to visit the burst of sunlight that made nearly dying well worth it (whether that is still Lizzy at this point or the title has been handed over to Agnes is open for speculation).

*****

Category 4: Is this the real life, is this just fanta-sea?

4x09 Lipet’s Seafood Company Red: Marlin– that’s not a very common name. I knew a Marlin when I was young. Marlin Trout. One boy, two fish names. Funny.

4x22 Mr. Kaplan Conclusion Red: Ho Chi Minh City! That’s it. I got away from you aboard that catfish trawler on the Saigon River. My God, the humidity. But fun times indeed. More to come, Agent Gale. More to come.

5x15 Pattie Sue Edwards Red: Smokey, as you well know, Heddie did not take a powder. She’s lying in her bed right now, sneezing and wheezing, swollen up like a puffer fish. I’m afraid all the dogs and cats finally got the best of her.

5x22 Sutton Ross Liz: I’ll get you for this. | Red: You’ll try, but there’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore, looking like an idiot.

6x03 The Pharmacist Red: On a side note, I once went fly fishing for a cutthroat trout in the Roaring Fork Valley, where, inexplicably, I stumbled upon Justice Antonin Scalia may God rest his soul and, boy, did we have some real barn burners. My word, that man could argue. Six hours, hip deep in whitewater, and with all the yelling, neither of us got so much as an alevin.

7x01 Louis T. Steinhil Red: But I’ve been paralyzed before. The spine of a blowfish pierced my wet suit off Pit–

Some fans have wondered how much truth there really is in stories such as “Marlin Trout” (4x09) or fly fishing with Justice Scalia (6x03). Even the lionfish story from 1x21 can be up for debate. Did Red really experience all this or is he making it up for the sake of a nice metaphor, to buy himself time, distract his opponent? Is it realistic for one man to be stung by two poisenous fish (a lionfish and a blowfish) on two separate occassions? And how did a former KGB agent (if we assume he really is Ilya Koslov) know a Marlin Trout when he was young and presumably growing up in Russia?

But what all the fish-references in the fourth category have in common is that they are used for comic relief. I guess it’s also safe to assume that after so many seasons and fish stories to which the fans reacted positively, some of these later fish references are purely there as Easter eggs for fan service and one can hardly blame the writers for that. The most recent one from Louis T. Steinhil (7x01) was a good example of using a fish reference just so the fans could cross that off their Blacklist Bingo chart.

Especially the bit from The Pharmacist (6x03) sticks out as it is a very obvious nod towards James Spader’s previous TV show Boston Legal in which his character goes fishing in Nimmo Bay where he later gets married by Antonin Scalia in the final episode of the show. Since Red spends the first half of season 6 in prison and we keep getting scenes of him defending himself in court, the writers saw their opportunity for an Alan Shore homage and they took it. Well done.

*****

That’s it, I hope some of you made it all the way to the end. There’s not really a conclusion to this except that I don’t think there really is some deeper meaning behind the many fish references other than the writers and/or James Spader obviously being into fish very much. The fish world offering a vast selection of potential metaphors and stories also fits in nicely with (the real) Raymond Reddington having been a Naval Intelligence Officer.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

[bountyandgrace]

There’s a lot to unpack about the Giant of Babil sequence and its immediate aftermath (KAIN IS OK AGAIN, WHATEVER THAT MEANS), and I will absolutely unpack it, but I’m going to dive on ahead a bit and talk a little bit about THAT SCENE.

Full disclosure: I go a little heavy on the caps lock here.

THAT SCENE is the one where, after coming all this way as a team on the combined merits of physical strength, magic, summons, and an optional sidequest featuring a frying pan, the team elects to follow Golbez and Fusoya to the moon to take down Zemus one and for all. 

And then Cecil kicks Rosa and Rydia off the ship, because something something it’s too dangerous blah blah blah.

After trying to argue with Cecil, Rosa—upset, of course, because she doesn’t want to leave Cecil to face this danger alone, and because she’s been part of everything so far—runs off. Then Edge backs Cecil up, and is a complete dick about it:

SHUT UP, EDGE. 

But I digress; Rydia runs off too, and Cecil, Kain, and Edge set off for the moon and a date with certain death BY THEMSELVES. Except, of course, they don’t; Rosa and Rydia have stowed away on the Lunar Whale, surprising the men when they go to disembark. Some more arguing ensues, Rosa and Rydia remind Cecil that they are the party’s ONLY GOOD MAGIC USERS, and everyone agrees to stick together.

WHO INDEED, ROSA? Cecil’s restorative abilities only go as far as Cura, so one assumes he was planning to assign Kain or Edge (or both, on a rotating basis) to permanent item duty, leaving two party members whose main attacks are physical to navigate the Lunar Subterrane and fight Zemus. This would, of course, be lunacy (SEE WHAT I DID THERE?).

(Now that I overthink this, I wonder whether the idea was to give the player the impression that the three men were going to meet up with Fusoya and Golbez on the moon, and that they’d join the party. Was that the idea? If so, it took me years to pick up on it, just as I never really noticed that they seem to be priming you for Cid rejoining the party right after Yang’s self-sacrifice only to have Cid exit within the same cutscene. In this case, I was too busy wondering WHAT THE HELL CECIL WAS THINKING.)

I remember coming across a fansite as a teenager. The owner was not keen on Rosa, a fashionable attitude at the time, as was their right. I will grant that the character deserved better writing, especially where the original English translation was concerned. But this person’s essay on this particular scene included a reference to “nearly falling off my chair” when Cecil told Rosa to get out of his way (once the women have revealed themselves to have stowed aboard) because he was finally standing up to her. WHAT. HOW.

Rosa needs rescuing exactly twice. The first time is after she contracts Sand Fever in the Kaipo desert while trying to find Cecil. The second time is after being kidnapped by Golbez. The game isn’t a series of missions to save Rosa. Was she supposed to hang out in worsening conditions in Baron and worry about Cecil? Why did anyone blame her for Golbez’s actions?

Anyway, this scene always bugged me, and some of the reaction to it also always bugged me. There isn’t really any way to update it in a way that makes sense, so the 3D version did the best it could. But also OH MY GOD, EDGE, SHUT UP.

[mobydickmusical]

Every book chapter a song is named after: Loomings (Ch 1)

Since most of the (most recent) tracklist is named after chapters of the book, I’m going to attempt to work through the whole of the show this way, talking a bit about my thoughts on each chapter’s translation into a song. Based on the tracklist chronology rather than the book chronology. Skipping the songs we’ve already heard, for obvious reasons.

Also fairly obvious, but even though I’m using the chapters to imagine the songs, I naturally can’t be sure how closely they’ll follow the text of that specific chapter (see, The Pacific, which actually follows completely different chapters). 

TW for brief mention of suicidal ideation 

Loomings is very different from Extracts, in that I can pretty easily envision it fitting into a show of Dave’s, and imagine what it might be like as a song.

This chapter is our first direct introduction to what to expect from the body of this book, and it has four-ish main sections: 

1. Ishmael introduces himself as the narrator recounting this story, and explains his general path in it (going to sea because it’s what he does when he’s exceedingly depressed) 

2. He dwells on mankind’s inevitable attraction to water, and that this is due to how it represents the unknowable to us 

3. He details his reasoning for why he always goes to sea as a simple sailor, as opposed to a passenger or a crew member of higher rank

4. He describes his “choice” to go on a whaling voyage in particular as actually designated by fate. He does, however, then explain his personal attraction to going on the voyage, that could make it appear like free will to him. 

So, there is a lot being set up in this chapter. I can very much feel this becoming my main issue to accept (i.e. get my head out of my ass) with reconciling the adaptation with the book overall - there is so Much in Moby Dick and there is only so Much you can fit into a musical. Even a 4+ hour one. But yeah, that’s seen on a smaller scale with Loomings, in how it sets up a lot of background information about Ishmael and how he thinks, as well as starting some thought process about a number of important themes for the book (fate vs free will, capitalist and power dynamics, the limits of mankind’s knowledge… all that important shit). Where the song draws its focus from will just depend on what Dave chooses to emphasise the most. 

I'll go through the chapter, and mention where I connected things to either comments Dave's already made about the musical, or to his writing in general.

Coming into reading Moby Dick because I knew Dave was writing his musical, and reading the opening paragraph of Loomings where Ishmael introduces himself by launching headfirst into the details his depression, I naturally went straight to “so this is an introductory solo for a character played by Dave”. It’s not only something that leapt out at me straight off the bat, but one of the more ludicrously famous sections of Moby Dick, so I have to imagine it’s likely to make an appearance. 

The further thing I wanted to point out while I’m on this section, is that despite how famous this little piece of Moby Dick which clearly describes Ishmael’s depression and suicidal ideation is, the majority of Moby Dick adaptions have little to no other reference to his depression. Or they just have none at all if they’re really eschewing the narration. I’m not saying that it’s a deal-breaker for an adaption or anything of that kind, but mental illness definitely has a presence and impact in Moby Dick (I’ll just, leave it at that for now) that doesn’t especially get a lot of attention. On the other hand, it’s something that I, personally, will notice and think about. Anyone who’s familiar with Dave, however, knows that his shows almost consistently revolve around mentally ill characters (and what’s probably the most famous solo he’s written is about depression/suicidal ideation), and portray them in ways mentally ill fans relate to and appreciate. If an adaptor was to make a specific effort to earnestly portray Ishmael’s depression, and how that relates to his role in this story, it’d be Dave. (I could potentially even argue that The Pacific and Cetology already suggest ways in which he’s doing this but. Mm.)

But, anyway. I said Loomings is a good fit for that song that can be found in almost any Dave Malloy musical, where everything is just starting out, and someone (who is often played by Dave) sits down to pour out all their frantic thoughts and unstable feelings and draw you into their story - so, how I imagine the song is strongly based off the pre-existing examples of that type of song. Namely, I drift to Pierre and The Astronomer. 

Both songs have aspects I like for an imaginary Loomings. They’re both ruminative, emotive introductions to a character and their brain’s inner workings. They’re both at least somewhat depressed and ranty. I like Pierre for its emotional tumult, its inquisitiveness and desire for something more, its explicit descriptions of the effects of his depression on his behaviour, its moment of curiosity about mankind, and its drama. I feel like Pierre barging his way into his introductory solo, the first time we ever hear him sing about himself, with “It’s dawned to me suddenly, and for no obvious reason, that I can’t go on living as I am...” is not worlds away from how Ishmael can come across. I also like how it’s piano-driven (because I unimaginatively imagine Ishmael as a pianist in the show), unlike The Astronomer, but on the other hand, I prefer the less dense instrumentation of The Astronomer (maybe not quite that sparse though. Intermediate). I also like The Astronomer for its slow-paced style ranting, its dreaminess, its dwelling on Big Ideas, and the way it is more an explanation of who this character is through exploring his beliefs. Which is relevant as Loomings goes on. 

Both songs, particularly Pierre, channel more anger and resignation than is really relevant to Loomings, however. A part of this is that they’re both dwelling inside the emotions of an unhappy/unsatisfying present, describing that to us as who they are, now. Ishmael is outside of his present self because he’s a narrator. Throughout Loomings he is... recounting his past, but also describing the future of and influences on his past self, moreso than his past self’s present or who he was at that particular time. And, from that more distant position, opening these influences up to us, and the rest of the world. Uh. How relevant or sensible this is to point out I don’t know, but it seems like a very different emotional experience to convey. 

The second section of Loomings, where Ishmael discusses water, moves the furthest from talking directly about himself and his story, I suppose, but is a big bit of theme/motif/setting foundation, and is also just very beautiful writing. I love it a lot, and I’d love to hear some of it put to music... A few little quotes from it because I like them:

What do you see?—Posted like silent sentinels all around the town, stand thousands upon thousands of mortal men fixed in ocean reveries.

///

They come from lanes and alleys, streets and avenues,—north, east, south, and west. Yet here they all unite. Tell me, does the magnetic virtue of the needles of the compasses of all those ships attract them thither?

///

There is magic in it. Let the most absent-minded of men be plunged in his deepest reveries—stand that man on his legs, set his feet a-going, and he will infallibly lead you to water

///

Yes, as every one knows, meditation and water are wedded for ever.

///

But though the picture lies thus tranced, and though this pine-tree shakes down its sighs like leaves upon this shepherd's head, yet all were vain, unless the shepherd's eye were fixed upon the magic stream before him.

I also like the abundance of rhetorical questions in this section, and how that invites the reader in as if you were in a conversation. Those could fit well into a theatre song, where you have Ishmael sort asking himself, sort of asking the audience (also a bit Pierre, tbh). This, combined with how much switching up of sentence length there is in this section, give it this lovely gentle-paced, meandering, breathing rhythm that makes me think of it being sung. There’s probably a better, more technical way of describing that, but I don’t know that smartness, so essentially - I can almost hear it simply because of the way it’s already written. 

The conclusion of this section is where Ishmael draws together his claim that the reason we all find water so magnetic is because to us it represents the things that’re unfathomable and unreachable in life:

Why upon your first voyage as a passenger, did you yourself feel such a mystical vibration, when first told that you and your ship were now out of sight of land? Why did the old Persians hold the sea holy? Why did the Greeks give it a separate deity, and own brother of Jove? Surely all this is not without meaning. And still deeper the meaning of that story of Narcissus, who because he could not grasp the tormenting, mild image he saw in the fountain, plunged into it and was drowned. But that same image, we ourselves see in all rivers and oceans. It is the image of the ungraspable phantom of life; and this is the key to it all.

It’d definitely be a way to get us onboard this ship, swept up in this journey, while we’re inside a theatre: “Come along with me, into this huge, intrinsic thing, come, and try to obsessively chase down whatever inscrutable thing is still maddening you in the craziness of the world today!” Mmm. 

A little thing I find interesting, however, is how this little piece, and how it’d be presented in the context of the show, relates to some pre-existing lyrics from Cetology: “And the ocean is too deep for me to fathom/ And life is just to big for me to bear/ But who am I to compare my despair to the shaking of the sea?” These lyrics have no root in the chapter Cetology itself, and I can only assume they’re actually rooted in this section here. The weirdness of that is how Ishmael makes the comparison he lays out in Loomings, but then immediately questions his right to make it. He paints his own personal experiences as insignificant in the scheme of it all, even if he does harbour those feelings about the ocean which are due to feelings about the unknown. Which is intriguing and opens up a lot of shit. There’s a lot going on in Cetology which can explain why he says that in the context of That Song, but it makes me wonder if this claim will appear in Loomings and then reappear later with the catch on the end, or if it’s sole appearance is in Cetology. It shall be seen. And I’ll probably discuss those Cetology lyrics more when I’ve... actually heard Loomings! Or, oh, you know, the full show for legit context. 

The next thing Ishmael does in this chapter is discuss why he makes the choice to go as just a "simple sailor" every time he goes to sea, in doing so telling us a bit more about himself and his opinions. I won’t expand on these hugely, but I do think it’s a fair enough point to say that Ishmael makes statements in this section which could act as starting points for themes that Dave has specified he’s discussing through this show - namely capitalism, democracy and race/systems of power, in this situation. 

One of Ishmael’s reasons is money. He doesn’t have the money to pay to go to sea as a passenger, he needs/wants to be paid for it as a sailor. The actual pay for which, by the way, is really, really not that much considering how dangerous a job he’s signing on for. But we have to survive somehow, we suppose...? And, his opinion on the money-making in general?

The urbane activity with which a man receives money is really marvellous, considering that we so earnestly believe money to be the root of all earthly ills, and that on no account can a monied man enter heaven. 

Another of his reasons is that he prefers not to go to sea in any higher rank because he doesn’t care for the honour attached to these positions, and doesn’t want the level of responsibility involved. He goes on to explain that while it can be unpleasant to be ordered around by one’s superiors, he accepts it, and there’s no sense in striving for superiority when he is in essence no lesser than them, since, he states, everyone is inevitably under the command of someone else. 

With very intentionally provocative wording in the context of a book published in America in 1851.

Do you think the archangel Gabriel thinks anything the less of me, because I promptly and respectfully obey that old hunks in that particular instance? Who ain't a slave? Tell me that. 

He finally says that it’s the ordinary sailors rather than their superiors who get the first, freshest breath of that revitalising ocean air. He then leans deeper into the thought: 

He thinks he breathes it first; but not so. In much the same way do the commonalty lead their leaders in many other things, at the same time that the leaders little suspect it.

Having laid out his justification for this choice, Ishmael moves onto why a whaling voyage specifically. He essentially accounts it to the mysteries of fate - though his desire to experience new, remote things could trick him into exaggerating the role of his free will. 

There’s a part towards the end of the chapter that I specifically wanted to point out, where Ishmael actually uses a piece of theatre as a metaphor for his voyage. It’s not as famous/iconic as some other parts from this chapter but it’s very entertaining in the context of an actual musical, and I’d love if it were referenced:

“And, doubtless, my going on this whaling voyage, formed part of the grand programme of Providence that was drawn up a long time ago. It came in as a sort of brief interlude and solo between more extensive performances. I take it that this part of the bill must have run something like this:

"Grand Contested Election for the Presidency of the United States "Whaling Voyage by one Ishmael

"BLOODY BATTLE IN AFFGHANISTAN." Though I cannot tell why it was exactly that those stage managers, the Fates, put me down for this shabby part of a whaling voyage, when others were set down for magnificent parts in high tragedies, and short and easy parts in genteel comedies, and jolly parts in farces—though I cannot tell why this was exactly; yet, now that I recall all the circumstances, I think I can see a little into the springs and motives which being cunningly presented to me under various disguises, induced me to set about performing the part I did, besides cajoling me into the delusion that it was a choice resulting from my own unbiased freewill and discriminating judgement.”

This little piece fits well with the metatheatricality Dave has said he’s interested in exploring in the show. In terms of this concept, he’s mentioned both Ishmael vs Meville antics, but also broadening the idea of character vs writer with the added layer of him as the composer playing Ishmael. This quote specifically refers to theatre, and referencing one’s own role in a performance, which obviously becomes increasingly funny when you’re a narrator in and composer of a musical based on the book. Pondering over your “shabby part”, and why it was given to you, while you’re existing in theatre you composed yourself… strikes me as in line with Dave’s humour. In the song Cetology, Ishmael already actually laments that “this could be an amazing song...”, in doing so pretty heavily suggesting that he’s self-aware of being in a musical he wrote. So I don’t think Dave using this quote for metatheatre’s sake would be that surprising. 

I also like this quote because of the quite bizarre, almost eerie throwaway piece of modern foretelling we’re given in the layout of performances in the “bill”. It’s interesting enough for a modern adaption to point out as it is, but especially since Dave is highlighting connections between the book and modern America, it feels like something he might reference. 

[zhaotings]

Me bet jar jar fucken hung liken a whale. Guds hesa can raw mesa anyday.

-----

me spent liken duey? dee? entire weeks wit disa sitten in askbox and me just. Me got notten. What could me possibly answeren? me tried all da “nope” gifs in disa guds forsaken website, me tried to draw what facen looks liken every timen me read disa, me tried to find fanart of jar jar wit his wang out and da universe was kind enough to mesa so dat me couldn’t find any. Me got notten. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely notten. What am me ganna sayen? what in god’s namen am me ganna sayen to dat?!

yousa see, me wanna fuck general grievous. Me do. Me wanten him usen all his foosa arms to simultaneously pullen both arms backen and touchen tits as hesa fucks mesa wit his mecha-schlong. Me do. Me wanna fuck darth maul, pre-legs cut off or posten metal legs+metal dick enhancement. Me wanna licken those horns. Okeeday? me wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, me do. Me wanna hear dat hard breatten and wrapen legs over dat dramatic cape while hesa force-chokes mesa and wesa do da do. Am me a weird robot-fucker? yousa bet yous ass me am! am me a tad too mui on da horny side? probably. Did me extrapolaten right to besa horny on main? fucken sue mesa. But disa. Disa.

how do yousa wanten mesa to facen family and all da dee (3) palos me have irl? how do yousa wanten mesa to walken into an elevator wit a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather been a litta hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talken liken every fucken old people me don’t know do, how do yousa expecten mesa not to answeren her wit “y’know what’s more weird, someone at disa berry moment plansa about jar jar binks goen balls-deep in themsa and me cannot talken about disa to anyone and da knowledge of disa? it’s tongue-grabben mesa alive. Alive, ma’am, and me don’t mean disa as some sick vore reference. Someone’s lunsa of those popped-up eyes, of dat weird high-pitched voice screamen meesa comen while they’re filled tup by jar jar bink’s thick seed, and i’m just standen hair while disa berry noteon rots mesa tada core, taken all life away from mesa. It’s a nightmare. Entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. Disa feetwalken now, ma’am, have a good day”

me leave da elevator. Me probably have an appointment, but me can’t rememberen where, or what per. Me sit neb on da feetwalken by da elevator doors. Me sob for full minute. Me take da elevator backen downstairs, me walken home, me collapse in bed and ruben una out plansa of darth vader. Me feel more good.

fife minutes more late, me think about disa asken again, and whole world collapses again. It’s only tuesday. Me sighen heavily and sit neb to write disa replyen. -

edit: mui of disa exaggerateon. Some of tis true. Yousa getsa to picken what exactly

I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.

I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!

You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.

How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”

I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.

Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-

Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.

[maxhoemo]

Beyond the Veil p6

trigger warning

“Just remember. You can’t save him. You can only help him...” 

That was what they told Ian. Their advice before he had to go off on his assignment. He stood in the corner of Max’s bedroom. At least, what he assumed was Max’s bedroom in this new house... Max was on top of that douche bag, Jeremy. His ex. Bouncing on his dick. Being as loud as ever, as usual. “Max... How could you come crawling back to this asshole?” he said out loud. Nobody could hear him anyways. The sight before him disgusted him so much, he almost forgot why he was here in the first place.

Luckily though, it didn’t last too much longer... The two eventually fell asleep. Ian figured Max was going to die tonight. Maybe a break and enter, but the time passed and nothing happened.

Ian had in fact dosed off in a chair, not really sure for how long. He was awoken abruptly by the sound of angry screaming. It made him jump awake by pure instinct. Getting a horrible feeling in his stomach. The sound reminded him of the way his dad used to yell when he was younger.

As everything came in to focus he saw it was Jeremy. Yelling at Max. 

“I’m sorry! I’m really sorry!” Max’s voice was so small. Not at all the way Ian remembered him. 

“Stop it! You’re not sorry. You wouldn’t have said it!” Jeremy rolled out of bed. Max’s eyes following him.

“It was an accident.... I dreamt about him....” he admitted. He seemed terrified to even admit it.

Jeremy just scoffed. Ian practically growled at what he was seeing play out before him.

“Because you’re still in love with him...”

“No, no,” Max shook his head. “I’m really not... i’m really not...” He repeated again, this time in a whisper.

Ian watched the couple go about their morning, wondering if things were always this tense between them. He knew who Max was referring to was himself. He also knew Max was lying when he said he wasn’t in love with him. It was hard to believe someone could be so insensitive. But he always knew Jeremy was an asshole.

“You know, Ian left you with nothing...”

“I know... But it’s not his fault. He didn’t expect to die!”

“Why are you making excuse for him?”

“I’m not, I just-”

“Yes you are!” Jeremy spun around. “Just stop thinking about that dead cunt, would you!?”

“I can’t...” Max said truthfully.

“Why are you here then!? You don’t love me!”

“Yes! Yes I do! I really do!”

“You’re just using me!”

“No, no! I’m not!”

“Anyone else would have kicked you out by now...”

“No, please don’t....”

“What’s wrong, Max? Are you scared? What are you scared of?” he asked. Ian’s face contorted in disgust as he watched him. He seemed to get some kind of a kick out of scaring Max and messing with his emotions. Max was far from the loud and joy-filled boy Ian remembered.

“Being homeless....” he forced out.

“You’re not wrong... You don’t have any god damn money...” Max just nodded. “You wonder why they don’t call you for your modelling gigs anymore? They’ve got a hundred younger, hotter guys to choose from. You’re past your prime, babe. I’m the last guy you’ll ever land. So you better hope I decide to keep you around.”

---

Ian was confused as to why he was seeing this. But more than that, he was disturbed. He was powerless to do anything. He watched Max sit on his bed in silence for a long time after Jeremy left. He couldn’t tell what he was thinking. He looked so broken. Like someone who had just given up. Ian couldn’t help but feel guilty. If he hadn’t have died, Max would never be in this situation. That asshole was right about one thing. He’d made Max too dependent on him. He had no work experience, and his fragile ego had been shattered once again by Jeremy, leaving him incapable of fending for himself. 

Eventually, Max stood up and silently wandered out of the room. Like a zombie. Ian followed him to the shower. He had never done anything to anyone, and neither had Max. What did they do to deserve this? They had a perfect little life together. Why couldn’t they have just kept it?

When Max was finished, Ian followed him back to the bedroom. He looked in the mirror. Staring at his face. Stretching the skin around his eyes. Concerned about some kind of wrinkle or imperfection Ian couldn’t even spot. Max had one of those cushioned benches at his dresser. As Ian sat down next to him, trying to get a closer look at what he was obsessing over, Max jumped. Letting out a small gasp, he looked all around the room. 

He looked scared. Freaked out. Like he had just felt Ian’s presence. The same way he did at the funeral. Ian brushed his fingers along Max’s cheek, but Max only shook his head and stood up. 

“I’m going crazy...” Ian heard him whisper to himself. He wiped a stray tear from his cheek and crawled back into bed. Not taking long to fall back asleep.

He didn’t know if it was wrong or against protocol or what. But these were his last moments with Max and he didn’t know how long he would get. He laid down beside him. Watching his chest rise and fall as he slept. 

“Oh, Max...” he sighed. “I’m so sorry.... I left you alone. But there was nothing I could do... Our times are all pre-destined. I don’t know what we did to deserve this... Especially you... I love you, Max...” his voice broke as he began to cry. Looking at Max’s soft face. Ian knew these were his last moments of peace before succumbing to a violent death. He brushed a strand of hair from his face, a tear rolling down his own cheek. As he was about to say more, the sound of the front door slamming made him jump.

Max’s eyes shot open. “Oh my god...” he panicked, glancing over at the clock. “It’s passed 4:30....! I slept all day... Fuck!” He ran a hand through his hair, looking around the room for something he could use to make himself look busy. The sounds of footsteps up the stairs slowly approaching.

“Max?” a voice called out. “Where are you?”

Max bit his lip and took a breath before answering. “In the bedroom...”

The footsteps came closer until the door opened. “Did you sleep all day again?”

“No,” Max shook his head.

“You didn’t take the garbage out like you said you would. The carpet’s covered in dog hair.”

“I’m sorry, I just forgot. I got busy. I’ll do it now, okay?”

“Busy with what? In your bathrobe?”

Max tried to think of something, but nothing came out.

“That’s what I thought. You’re a leech, Max.”

“I know...”

Jeremy pushed past Max to get to the dresser. Rummaging in a drawer for something.

“W-what are you looking for?”

“Nothing, I’m just grabbing a-” he stopped. Pulling something out and studying it. Ian couldn’t see what it was from where he was, but he could tell by Max’s face that he knew. And whatever it was, Max didn’t want him to find it.

“You kept this?” Jeremy asked.

“I just stashed it there. I don’t look at it. I just wanted to keep it...”

“You told me you got rid of all this...”

“I’m sorry.”

“Max. You’re nothing but a liar!” he shouted, and whatever it was came flying across the room. Max covered his head as the object just narrowly missed him and smashed against the wall behind him. As it lay on the floor, Ian could now see what it was. A picture of him and Max in a cheap frame. The very same one that used to sit on their nightstand when he was alive. He looked up at Max, who was struggling to catch his breath.

“I’m sorry! Please! I’m sorry!” he whaled. “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry,” he said over and over in quick succession.

“You’re not! I bust my ass all day while you lay in bed! Wishing I was someone else! Don’t you dare lie to me! I know it’s true!”

Before Max could say anything, Jeremy had him pinned against the wall, only inches away from Ian. “Do you love me?” Jeremy asked. Max nodded. “Say it then. Tell me.”

“I love you...” Max said in a small voice.

“You love me, Max? You aren’t just using me?”

“No. I love you. I really do... Don’t hurt me, please...” Max closed his eyes, turning his face away the best he could against the wall. 

He sounded so small and pathetic, it made Ian feel sick to his stomach. He felt his heart beating in his chest. He just wanted to throw up. There was nothing he could do but watch.

Jeremy used his tight grip on Max’s shoulders to pull him forward and knock him back against the wall, producing a horrible thud that made Ian jump. It sounded as though Max’s skull had hit the plaster hard enough to crack. “Shut up, Max... Just shut up! You’re so pathetic!” he shouted, slapping the boy twice in the face.

Max whimpered, trying to put his hands up to protect himself, but Jeremy easily grabbed both of his wrists and held them above his head. Max looked back at him. Into his eyes. As if he were contemplating what he was going to do next. Jeremy leaned in and kissed Max on the mouth, to which Max only stood there completely still. Eyes open and full of fear.

Jeremy pulled away and looked at Max for a long time. Neither Max or Ian could read his face. Until suddenly, he exploded again. Unintelligible shrieks against Max. His throat scratchy and raw in frustration. He slammed Max’s head against the wall a second time, and then let go. Max grabbed his head, crying out in pain and struggling to find his balance again. It was unbearable to watch.

Max’s bathrobe had slipped down one shoulder and Jeremy easily tore off the rest. Leaving Max in only his underwear. “Stop it...”

“You said you loved me,” Jeremy sneered, pulling Max against his body. 

Max pushed away the best he could. “Stop it!” he shrieked. He no longer sounded so pathetic, he was starting to put up a fight the way Ian had always remembered Max being able to. 

“You love me, don’t you?” he taunted again, slamming Max up against the now cracked wall.

“Stop it!” As Jeremy tried to pull his underwear off, Max gripped tightly to the waistband. “No!” he kept one side clenched tight in his fist and brought up his other hand to try and push Jeremy away. 

“I’ll break your fucking arm!”

Ian’s eyes were wide as he stood frozen on the other side of the room. He reached for a porcelain Lucky Cat figurine on Max’s dresser and lobbed it as hard as he could at Jeremy’s head. But nothing happened. Ian looked behind him to see it was sitting exactly where it had been, as if Ian had never touched it at all.

When he looked back at the scene, Jeremy was tossing Max face first on to the bed as if it took no effort at all. Max was still putting up a fight, Flailing his legs, he managed to land a hard kick against Jeremy’s abdomen. As he stopped to catch his breath, Max tried to scramble over to the other side of the bed and escape, but he wasn’t fast enough. 

Ian squeezed his eyes shut, unable to watch anymore. He covered his eyes with his hands and turned around. Hearing nothing but the horrible cries of pain from Max and the sounds of his injuries. 

“Please!” Ian shouted to himself. And maybe to God, or whoever was running things, too. “Just let it end! Let it end! Let it end! Let it end!” he just kept saying it, trying to drown out the sounds.

It took a long long time. Ian didn’t look back over again until the noise had stopped. He heard the bedroom door slam. He was afraid to face what was behind him but he knew he would have to. He was already in tears and seeing Max on the ground only made things worse. He was nearly unrecognizable. 

He was struggling to breath, desperately clinging to life. It was horrible. Ian stepped over and slowly knelt down beside him. “Max...” he whispered.

Max looked at him. He really looked at him. Right in the eyes. He could see him. “...Ian...?” he struggled to speak.

“Yes, Max. It’s me. Shh...” he brushed a blood soaked lock of hair from his face.

“Ian... I don’t...Wanna die....” He was so scared. 

“Max, it’s okay. You don’t have to hurt anymore. I’m here. I’m here with you. Close your eyes, baby.... Just close your eyes. Everything’s gonna be okay...”

“Ian...”

“Baby. Just relax, okay? Just relax.” Ian gently rubbed Max’s back in circles. Eventually Max let himself slip away. 

When he did, Ian rose to his feet, pulling Max’s soul from his body as he did so. 

“Ian...”

“Max,” Ian smiled. “You look just like I remember.”

“So do you... i’m dead, aren’t I?” Ian nodded. Max turned to look down at his own corpse, but Ian stopped him. 

Pulling his head into his shoulder he held the back of his head in place. “Don’t look at it.”

“That’s me down there, isn’t it?”

“No. This is you. That’s just your body. You don’t need to see that.” His grip turned to a soft combing of Max’s hair. “I love you so much.”

“So do I...” Max’s voice broke. “I missed you every day.” He pulled away, looking into Ian’s eyes. 

“Max...” Ian frowned. “I wish I could stay here and hold you forever.”

“Then do it. We have forever now.”

Ian shook his head. “No, baby. Max. You have to go into the light now...”

“But...”

“You have to. I’m here to take you to your afterlife.”

“But... What about you?”

“I’m a grim reaper... I can’t go with you yet...”

“But when!?” Max sniffled.

“I don’t know... Do you see it?”

Max nodded.

“You have to go.”

“Please...”

“Max, you’re going to a better place. Trust me. You have to go now.”

Max hesitated for another moment, looking over at where Ian assumed he saw his light. “I trust you....” he decided. 

---

Ian let out a heavy sigh. As he was leaving the house, he heard the sound of a dog whining. He looked. It was Kevin. “Come on boy,” Ian picked him up. He whined and cried as if to ask “Where’s Max?” Ian just held him close.

[toasttz]

How to Make Games: Gacha Games

Hey, do you wanna make more money than several member nations of the EU?! I know I sure did, so when I was 12 my sister and I set up a lemonade stand that made several times the value of Greece's GDP when you consider that negatives cancel each other out. Hey, do you want to make MEANINGFUL amounts of money and have zero moral compunctions that might inhibit your success even though the road to the top is steep and lined with unethical business practices? Well, just insert $29.99 (397.48 Canadian dollars) and I'll teach you how to make some fuckin' gacha games! Gacha games, games inspired by a terrifying Japanese tradition known as "Seppuku" where you shoot pinballs in order to undress a girl carrying a bowl of ramen - before I go any further I feel that my understanding of Japanese culture may be a little out of date, so apologies where necessary - and something else happens, blah, blah, blah, and you get some toys or some shit. When it was discovered that Android and iOS can be programmed in such a simple and fast way that typewriters and some house plants with high RAM amounts can run the code, the market soon became flooded, but not saturated, with gacha games. Why hasn't the market hit saturation point despite the fact I can't scroll further than a gnat's dick in winter's length on the Google Play Store without hitting one? Because, as the wise Chinese philanderer, Aristotle, posited, "The difference in hardcore pr0n and gacha is a string bikini and $39.99 USD, but the amount of shame is equal in both," So, the games are retardedly easy to code and the only decision you'll spend one afternoon making is if you want to spend 2 hours making it a fully-automated RPG, 5 hours to make it a complex battler with some meaningful gimmicks, or 15 minutes copying Puzzles & Dragons. These options have totally not been done to death, so feel no worry if you can't be arsed to innovate. Once you have done the easy part, the next part is to locate someone with artistic talent and ask them to draw girls. Lots and lots of girls. Unlike H-games, the theme here can be as broad or narrow or as obtuse as you want. In fact, you can use multiple themes or just do what most of these games do and just steal from history and myth and make them all girls! It literally doesn't matter how deep or nuanced your story or gameplay are if the 2D waifus are cute enough. Lots of girls are necessary - tall girls, short girls, thicc girls, lean girls, brown girls, bunny girls... just don't stop making girls. Ever. You'll be expected to actually update about every two weeks or so, but that's getting ahead of ourselves. Lastly, for each summoning banner, place four characters on them in varied, dynamic poses and outfits in the ratio of 3 girls and 1 guy. "Guys?" I hear you ask incredulously. Yes, I recently read a very scientific study that said girls sometimes use the internet now and, so, to compensate for this possible oversight, each banner needs one shirtless guy, but unlike girls, never vary their body types. Just watch a few Marvel movies for their shirtless stud scenes and copy that - that's all you'll have to do! And sometimes give them different hats, so they know they're different guys. What? Sound design? Pffft. Don't be ridiculous. Everyone's going to be playing this game at their jobs when they can't play their real game libraries, so they're just going to mute them. Those that don't will be the creepy weirdos just listening to their waifu of choice's voice actress anyway. Besides, Wendee Lee is gonna do 85% of the voices anyway. You can just skip this part. The core of any gacha game, as it was foretold in the Japanese romcom, The Art of War & Peace, by Leo Toystore, is their summoning mechanic. You need some kind of in-game currency to exchange in order to summon heroes to make up your party. Sure, you'll give the players some generic filler heroes, but they'll all be bottom-tier and Worst Waifus(TM) with no real potential for growth, but that way no one can call foul on your game design. The real draw will be summoning, so make your orbs or your gems or whatever, just be sure that they're artificially inflated like nations that no longer rely on the gold and silver standards, because just like those nations that no longer rely on the gold and silver standards your imaginary currency is backed by fucking nothing other than your insistence that, yes, 300 platinum gems totally costs $49.99, stop asking so many questions! The second-most pivotal point is that your exchange between currencies and summons is completely irrational. Anything from 5 to 150 is acceptable, just so long as it's never, ever 1:1. That would make it easy for your fans to deduce the true value of your currencies and that's literally the last thing you want. You can set aside special vouchers for people who acquire enough "Good Boy Points" by making the game a habit rather than a game in the requisite "Daily Login Bonus" category. But those are entirely secondary and should still have the same low, low rates of drawing heroes anyone gives a shit about. About once a year you can hand them 5-Star Summon Vouchers, if they have enough Good Boy Points and throw them a bone to keep them in the dopamine loop. So, once the game is on market, just rotate your banners every two weeks, usually in the pattern of "Useless, Fanservicey" Banner twice, then "Mechanically Powerful Characters" Banner once, then repeat. That way players are inclined to waste their currencies on bathing suit beauties or Valentine's Day honeys instead of the St. Patrick's Day themed Hero who has S Ranks in Strength and Defense. This will incentivize players to routinely pay up like the good little whales they're meant to be. Err, I mean... it will encourage players to contribute to your work economy, so your studio can keep the lights on... like the good little whales they're meant to be! There we go, much better. Now just slap on a campaign mode and a crap-ton of side missions - preferably one or more for each hero you make in order to pad out the game length - and then slap a Stamina Bar on top of that! Make sure they can't do more than 10 missions in a day's time at the highest possible levels, so they don't blast through your paper-thin experience and keep ponying up properly. This will also tie back into the "make the game a habit" goal we talked about earlier. Once you have enough starving artists ball-n-chained to their writer desks churning out waifus, that's pretty much it! You have a sustainable game in the same way a drug cartel overlord does! Now make another following the above and enjoy double the money, ad infinitum! Also, one last bit of writing advice: never actually finish the story. Just keep adding new 'twists' and 'complications' no matter how hackneyed they may be! If they're getting bi-weekly banners, they aren't complaining that the story only updates every financial quarter when the investors start asking questions! Bonus points for making your characters aware of the events as they come and go and reference past banners - this will add the illusion of depth to your writing and characters. Congrats! You're contributing to the blight on the Earth's surface known as cell phone games. When the aliens find us and we try to rationalize all the good we've done, yours will be one among many sins that cause us to get vaporized to make way for a cosmic-scale McDonalds. But, hey, you can't take all that shit-ton of money you'll make with you when you go anyway. You're welcome.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Fear 4x13: BlackJack - Analysis

Who watched Fear last night? Once again, I saw a lot of important symbols. Lots of parallels to Beth and Daryl’s story that were then confirmed on TTD.

***As always, spoilers abound for FTWD 4x13, Blackjack. Don't read until you've watched!***

I noticed fridge in the opening credits was floating in water. I still haven't posted the coolant theory, and probably won’t for a few weeks yet. Fear puts little hints about what the episode will be about in the opening credits. The most obvious thing here is the big lake John and Strand are trying to get across. Out of any character in Fear, John is the most like Beth. In the coolant theory, the refrigerator probably represents Beth, and we saw it floating in the lake. And in the episode, at one point, John is stranded in a small boat in the middle of the lake. More on that in a second.

Morgan’s Group:

We start out with Morgan's group, looking for Quinn, who we know Filthy Lady killed last episode. June said, "We should keep looking." This is a direct call back to 5x16. Daryl wanted to keep looking for Red Poncho Guy, but Aaron convinced him to go into the cannery instead, where they accidentally triggered the Wolf trap. It's not a coincidence they're coming back to this, especially since it was Morgan who saved them from the trap. Now they want to keep looking for people in Fear.

As it turns out, Filthy Lady is also somewhat Lizzie-like. She said she let Quinn “become what he was meant to be,” which in her mind is a walker.

Morgan buries walker they found. (Once again, even random walkers get burials, but not Beth.)

Remember that the owner of the truck Sarah and Wendell stole calls himself Polar Bear. We also find out this episode that he kept journals. Between the bear symbolism and Polaris (North Star and part of the dog/Sirius symbolism) obviously both those things equal Beth. Now we find he also kept journals. Like Beth

While in front of mile marker 74, Sarah says, “this is a frog/scorpion situation.” She’s basically justifying stealing Polar Bear’s truck. We’ve see frog symbolism before, specifically in Them. 

Remember that frogs are major transformation/resurrection symbolism. So basically the symbols of frogs, Polaris and bears are all being used to represent the same guy here. They guy who keeps journals and believes in helping people. He’s leaving them water (a callback to Aaron leaving TF water in 5x10) and other items in the boxes. Is this screaming Beth to you yet?

Then, Sarah says the frog left his KEYS in his truck. (Key theory).

The story made me realize something. We’ve harped on the key theory before, but more specifically there’s a theme of keys being left behind in a car. The first thing that came to mind is when Rick and Daryl met Jesus in 6x10. He got out of the truck he stole from them to change a tire. They tied him up and when they got back in the truck, the keys were in there. In 5x02, when Carol found the car on the side of the road, the keys were in there too. If you go back to Them, 5x10, Maggie found keys inside the car, which she used to open the trunk. More recently, we saw an iteration of this in Red Machete with one of the Saviors, which with they even paralleled shots of him looking through the car to how Maggie did it in 5x10. 

At the end, Morgan is in the truck, which is attacked by Filthy Lady. I was kind of surprised how many groups came together in this episode. Granted, we only got three episodes left, but I kind of figured they wouldn't all come together until the very last one. I suppose they’re not really altogether. John and Strand still haven't reconnected with the group at all. 

Alicia and Charlie did reconnect, but only via the walkie. They haven't actually met up with the group yet. Still, it's getting the group together very quickly. That's probably because they have to deal with Filthy Lady. She's obviously doing her best to cause them trouble.

John and Strand:

John and Strand are definitely a retelling of Beth and Daryl here. Even on TTD, Colman Domingo (Strang) said this was a battle of faith. John Dorie, as ever, is the positive, faithful one. Just like Beth was. Meanwhile, Strand is the negative hopeless one. Like Daryl.

Lots of little symbols in their story. We see a black grackle, which is heavily emphasized and often mentioned. I looked it up and there’s a lot of interesting symbolism around black grackles. I won’t go into all of it here except to say that it works well for John and Strand’s story. There are things that obviously apply to what each characters is going through here.

In terms of Beth, I think it could apply in two specific ways. (I’m sure there are more, but this post is already long, so I’ll keep this particular angle short.) The first thing that came to mind is the Black and White theme around Beth and Daryl. The bird is black, which would represent Daryl. We didn’t see live white animals, but right after it first shows the bird, Strand picks up a copy of Moby Dick. 

The cover is mostly just water, but also shows the tail fin of the whale. Guess what color it is? White. (Cuz the whale in Moby Dick is white anyway.) So we have the black and white theme, and the white one (which has always represented Beth) is an ocean creature. Just saying.

In terms of grackle symbolism, one thing that leapt out at me is that the crackle usually perches and caws either just BEFORE DAWN or just after sunset. It’s the before dawn that caught my attention because we believe Beth will appear with a sunrise. Sirius the dog star also reappears before sunrise. And in this episode, it was obviously first thing in the morning that the bird was seen, because Strand was still asleep and it woke him.

Also, at one point, John says it’s odd that the grackle is alone. They always fly in groups or herds and he’s never seen just one on its own before. I think it’s a theme about the bird being separated from its family/loved ones. Which works well for this episode, since the group (especially John and June, who mirror Beth and Daryl) are separated from one another.

They draw attention to the bird by saying "the early bird kills the dead." We also know that will be birds in TWD S9. One of the promo pics include Rick, Michonne, and Judith watching a flock of birds. This is obviously an ongoing symbol and theme.

Other symbols we saw include water bottles and canned food, including a lot of green on the cans, 

a fire extinguisher,

and binoculars.

Back Moby Dick. I'm not entirely sure what the Moby Dick connection is yet. The most obvious thing in this episode is the body of water. In Strand and John's case, it’s an alligator rather than a whale, but the alligator did attack the boat they’re in. I’ll admit the reference doesn't bode particularly well for the characters, as Ahab doesn't survive in Moby Dick. But it could also be symbolic. Strand’s faith was kind of “killed” in the alligator attack and he gave up.

Strand said he lost his stomach for boating. That's obviously meant to be a humorous callback to Fear S2, where the characters spent a good chunk of the season on a boat, but it's also an ocean/sailor/boating reference.

At one point, John says the water is moving "slower than a one-legged dog." Wow. Not only is that a dog reference, but a reference to an injured dog. Granted, Sirius is a one-eyed dog, not a one-legged dog, but it brings up a similar image. We could also compare this to the Lost Shoe/Foot symbolism around Beth.

We see several road signs underwater, including a 30-mph sign. We’ve seen that a lot in the show. 

John sees a walker going into the river just before the crocodile gets it. The walker going into the river as it did, looked exactly like what we saw in 4x08. Lily saw a walker move into the river and be swept away by the current. Just saying.

John says, "There ain't no happy endings, but we gotta fight every day... Or we are no different than the passed." Just sounds like something Beth would say. Very much her philosophy. It also occurred to me that it applies to Beth and Daryl. They didn't get to have their happy ending. I think they still will, it will be a matter of them fighting to get back together, not simply “getting” a happy ending. It’s very similar to Carol saying in Consumed that they “don’t get to save people anymore.” They always try, of course, but it doesn’t really work that way in this world. Those people have to save themselves. Have to fight to live. So once again, this was heavy on themes we saw heavily emphasized around Beth in S5.

We also had a major theme of people being trapped in the front seats of cars. I’ll talk more about this when I talk about Luciana, but John also found a walker trapped in the front of the truck. He wants the truck’s shell to cross the lake, but it was the walker that caught my attention. It was trapped in the front seat…with a bottle of booze. Just saying.

When Strand tries to get the bottle, he gets pulled into the front seat and nearly killed himself. It just seems a bit suspicious that he tried to get some booze and ended up in the water. It's something we might relate to Beth.

Strand also says, "I drink to forget that I don't have anyone to drink with anymore." They mentioned how sad this line was on TTD. It's Strand’s way of saying he misses Madison and all the other people he's lost. But (naturally ;D) I can't help but think of Beth and Daryl. They drank together, and remember that both were offered booze after separating and refused it. Dawn offered it to Beth and she refused. Denise offered it to Daryl in 6x14 and he refused as well. Now, of course we did see him drinking it when burying her, but that was both to honor her, because he was suddenly super-depresed, and, symbolically, to parallel her death with Beth’s. And even though Carol was there, he was still drinking alone. The point is that both Beth and Daryl refused other drinking buddies after the two of them drank together at the moonshine shack.

John and Strand use the battery from the truck and a car horn as a distraction for the alligator. Obviously, Battery Bheory, especially because it runs out of juice halfway through. The horn, of course, also reminded me of 6x02 when the Wolves arrived and blew the horn. Just things we’ve see tied up in Beth symbolism a lot. At one point, Strand says to John, "Well, I didn't think it survive a bullet to the gut, but here we are." To which John replies, "You just gotta believe. Fight for one more day."

Remember that when John got shot, that was a huge retelling of Beth and Coda. So, it's important that someone says they didn't think John would survive, but here we are. And his line, “You just gotta believe,” is almost identical to Beth saying, "Would it kill you to have a little faith?"

When the battery dies and they lose their distraction, John says "That's a pickle." So, St. Nicholas and pickle story. But really think about that. Obviously the “death” of the battery here represents literal death. The Battery Theory was first thought up because of how many batteries we saw being brought back to life. (TWD episodes 4x04, Daryl at gas station. 5x02, Carol and car on side of the road. Even 5x11 with the RV batteries.)

The St. Nicholas/Pickle story is about 3 resurrections. So we see the death of a battery here, and there’s an immediate resurrection symbol that follows it. Said by John, who has a billion—yes, a billion!—parallels to Beth. Just saying.

At this point, the two men are stranded in the water with the gator. Not entirely sure how to interpret the symbolism yet, but I'm sure it's important. It feels like something that might be an analogy of what happened to Beth. In her case, I think she was stranded in a sea of walkers rather than water. Trapped that way. But we’ve seen water be used to symbolize her a lot as well. I'm sure it will make sense once we get her whole story.

I also couldn’t help but think of 7x08 when Rick and Daryl got the supplies from the houseboat. They had some really obvious Beth symbolism in that scene. In that case, there is no alligator, but there were walkers in the water and the boat started taking on water, just as John and Strand’s did here.

So it's a theme of being on the water and besieged by some sort of predator (walkers/alligator) while their boat is sinking. They have to fight to live. I'm wondering if Beth will find herself in a similar situation at some point. In this case, it was sad because John Dorie didn't make it across the lake. He kept saying, "We could make it.” Nearly identical to Beth saying in Still, "We made it." John went back with Strand and was obviously depressed that he hadn't pushed forward. But he’s still alive, and obviously will just have to fight a little harder to get back to June.

On TTD, they described the, the relationship between John and Strand. They said they really were like an angel and a devil. Colman talked about how their arguments work very intimate emotionally. That's exactly how they described Beth and Daryl on TTD after Still. They said Bethyl being in the trunk together was a metaphor for the overall situation. They’re forced into this very intimate situation, just the two of them, but they’re surrounded by danger.

In a way, you could see John and Strand’s situation similarly. As I said at the beginning, John = Beth and Strand = Daryl. Rather than being caught in the trunk of the car and surrounded by walkers, there stuck in a tiny boat that's filling with water and there's an alligator out there waiting to eat them. Everyone seeing the parallels?

Luciana:

Lucian’s arc, in many ways, is the one that hit me the hardest with the symbolism.

While looking for Charlie, Luciana goes to a library. I won’t go into library details here, but this isn’t, by far the first time we’ve seen a library (think where Morgan took Carol in 6x16 after she was shot) or even the first time we’ve seen it in Fear.

Outside the library, she finds a man in a car. This is the second instance of a man trapped in the front seat of the car. Unlike John Dorie’s case, this man is still alive. He crashed his car into a pole during the storm and his injuries are critical.

His name is Clayton, and later in the episode, we learn he drove the truck Sarah and Wendell stole. So Clayton is Polar Bear. The man Morgan is looking for.  

Here's where it gets crazy, guys. Polar bear =’s Beth right? The man who calls himself Polar Bear is found injured and trapped in the front seat of a car. Not to mention, what does he ask Luciana for? To go find him some beer. Just like Beth and Daryl in Still, Luciana goes looking for a drink.

She's in paralleled more with Daryl than Beth here, though. Even though Beth was the one who first went looking for a drink, all she found was peach schnapps. After that, Daryl went looking for alcohol for her. Luciana is more like Daryl because she's not looking for her drink for herself. She's looking for drink for someone else who's requested it. And then there's the fact that Polar Bears/Clayton equals Beth. Therefore Luciana must equal Daryl.

There were little symbols around Luciana, too. There were some black-and-white racecar flags in the background. 

She looked into a fridge. She saw a car with a hole in the hood, which looked like the engine been removed. (That scene was juxtaposed with John Dorie taken the engine out of the car he found using it to build his boat. So. it was kind of a theme about cars with missing engines.)

Lucy finds root beer with the green lid. It also struck me that Lucy was having a hard time finding the alcohol she was looking for. Strand found alcohol he wasn't looking for at all. I don't know if there's anything to that. (The things that make you go, “Hmm.”) The girl who drank the alcohol in S4 is missing, and if the alcohol represents her in the front seat of car, Strand found her when he wasn't looking for her. Chances are the same will be true of Daryl finding Beth.

Clayton told Luciana that in the old world, he ran away from the people he loved by being a truck driver. He was hiding from them and when world ended, he realized it was a huge mistake. That's why he began helping people. I don't know exactly how to relate that to Beth and Daryl, but it feels like something that should be.

When Lucy brings Clayton the beer, he surprised it's cold. She says she found an ice pack in the first aid kit. Just feels like more of the coolant theme. He also gives Luciana all his notebooks and journals.

And what do you know? When Clayton dies, Luciana buries him. We don't get a very good shot of the grave, but we see the headstone and she leaves the beer bottle on top. 

Once again, this is something TWD does. Anyone at all important to the story get burial. And often mementos are left behind. They nailed Patrick's classes to his headstone in S4. They left Tyreese’s beanie on his headstone in S5. Now Luciana left the beer bottle on Clayton's headstone here. We did not see what happened to Beth's body. She did not get burial. She did not get headstone. She did not get a momento left behind. Nope, nada, zilch, nothing.

I guess I can’t end without touching on the title. Blackjack refers to the candy John is carrying around. 

There really is a black licorice taffy candy called Blackjack, and he knows June likes it. So he’s kind of carried it as a symbol of his hope for reuniting with her. It was sad here because at the end, he’s very sad and eats the candy, as if to show that he’s losing his hope.

I’m sure we could get into the particulars of Blackjack (also called 21) and see the ways in which it relates to John and June’s story, and even to Beth’s. It’s very much about gambling and beating the odds. It’s all about chance and luck. Of course there are strategies for beating the dealer as well. But this post is hella long and I won’t go into all of that.

The thing it reminds me most of is the 4 poker queens, of which Beth is one. Let’s put it this way. They could have used any candy they wanted to symbolize June and John’s hope of finding her. Anything at all would have worked as long as they related it to the story. They chose to use something that invokes poker suites and symbols we’ve seen in regular TWD. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I think that's all I have. I'm still loving this season of Fear and can't wait for next week's episode. Anyone else see anything I missed?