#when they're usually very animated is terrifying

[promptsforyourwhumpfic]

Whump Prompt #1123

Submitted by Anon - thanks!

Your whumpee is drugged by the whumper, only to be rescued while still out of it.

The whumpee’s team have never seen whumpee look so frail and lax.

The whumpee eventually starts waking up and thinks they’re still in danger and tries pathetically to shove the well meaning caretaker away from them.

[star-ocean-peahen]

After watching Cinderella (the original animated movie, which was my favorite as a child), it strikes me how it solves many common problems people have with this fairy tale. Like:

Why did they try to identify the mystery girl using her shoe size? Because the bullheaded king's only clue to her identity was the shoe the Grand Duke picked up off the steps.

Why didn't the prince recognize her by her face? Because his father wouldn't involve him in the process at all, and wasn't the one going around trying to find her.

Why did the prince want to marry a lady he only met that night? Because his father was going to force him to marry someone, and he genuinely liked this woman.

Why did Cinderella want to marry a man she only met that night? Because marriage was her best and most secure way to freedom. Fucked up, but you can't say it's unrealistic for the setting of a fairy tale. She also genuinely liked him.

If they're using the slipper to find her, wouldn't it be more sensible to search for the person with the other slipper? Yes. The King is purposefully nonsensical and the Duke is purposefully terrified enough of him to carry out his orders to the letter. Furthermore, they end up doing that in the end anyway, because the Duke's glass slipper is shattered, and Cinderella brings out the one she has to prove her identity.

Why didn't the stepmother and stepsisters recognize Cinderella at the ball? Because they were dancing too far away, and then left the party to dance in private, which was possible because the King wanted very badly for his son to hit it off with someone and tried to arrange the best conditions for that to happen.

Why didn't Cinderella save herself? Because in real life, abuse victims should not have to shoulder that responsibility, and usually can't. In real life, you need and deserve an external support system. Asking for help, in this kind of situation, is very important. She is saved by others because she is loved. Because she is not alone. Because she has friends who love her, and want her to be happy and safe and free. Because in real life, people who want to help someone who is suffering are like the mice. We can't pull out miracle solutions, but we can provide companionship and if we're in the right place at the right time, we can help the person find a better life.

Why didn't the fairy godmother save Cinderella from her abusive household, or try to help her sooner? Because she's magic, and magic can't solve your problems. Quote: "Like all dreams, well, I'm afraid it can't last forever." This (and Cinderella's dream of going to the ball) is a metaphor for pleasurable things in bad circumstances. An ice cream won't get rid of your depression, but it will provide you with momentary happiness to bolster you, as well as the reminder that happiness in general is still possible for you. Cinderella doesn't want to go to the ball so she can get away from her stepmother and stepsisters, or so she can meet someone to marry and leave with. She wants to go to the ball to remind herself that she can still have things she wants. That her desires matter. This is important because the movie does a very good job of illustrating Lady Tremaine's subtle abuse tactics, all of which invisibly press the message that Cinderella doesn't matter. While going to the ball and fulfilling her dreams may not be a victory in the material sense, it is still a victory against Lady Tremaine's efforts.

Why is Cinderella's choice to be kind and obedient framed as a good thing, when you are not obligated to be kind to your abuser? This one walks a very fine line, but I think the movie still makes it make sense. Lady Tremaine never acknowledges her cruelty. She always frames her punishments of Cinderella as Cinderella's fault. Cinderella is interrupting, Cinderella is shirking her duties, Cinderella is playing vicious practical jokes. Cinderella is still a member of the family, of course she can go to the ball, provided she meet these impossible conditions. Lady Tremaine's tactics are designed to make Cinderella feel like she must always be in the wrong and her stepmother must always be in the right. If Cinderella calls her stepmother out on her cruelty, or attempts to fight back, Lady Tremaine can frame that as Cinderella being ungrateful, cruel, broken, evil, etc. If Cinderella responds to her stepmother's cruelty defiantly (in the way she's justified to), she's not taking control out of Lady Tremaine's hands. Disobedience can be spun back into her stepmother's control. She wants Cinderella to be angry and sad and show how much she's hurting. So since Cinderella is adapting to her situation, she chooses to be kind. Not only because she naturally wants to be and it's part of her personality, but because it is a form of defiance in its own way, and it allows her to keep a reminder of her agency and value. Her choice to be kind is her chance to keep her own narrative alive: she is not obeying because her stepmother wants her to and she has to do what her stepmother does, but because she wants to. It's a small distinction, but one that makes all the difference in terms of keeping her hope and identity. (Fuck, I wrote a whole paragraph about how this doesn't mean you can't be angry at people who hurt you or that you need to be kind to deserve help, and then deleted it by accident. Uh. Try again.) Expressing anger and pain is an important part of regaining autonomy and healing. Although it is commendable to be kind while you are suffering, it is NOT required for you to get help or be worthy of help. If Cinderella's recovery was explored beyond "happily ever after" she would need to let herself be angry and sad to heal. Cinderella is not only kind because it comes naturally to her, but because it's her defense against the abuse she's suffering. Everyone's story and experiences are different, and one does not invalidate the other.

Bonus round for answers that aren't part of the movie:

Why didn't Cinderella run away? Where would she go? Genuinely, in hundreds-of-years-ago France, where would she go if she snuck out of the window with a change of clothes? With her step-family, she's miserable and abused, but she's fed, clothed, and in no danger of dying or being taken advantage of by anyone other than her stepmother and stepsisters. Even if she escapes and manages to find financial security, her stepmother might be able to find her and get her back.

Why didn't Cinderella burn the house down with them inside it/slit their throats in the night/poison their food/etc.? Because that's a revenge fantasy, and this story is a fantasy about being saved. There's nothing wrong with making Cinderella into a revenge fantasy. That's perfectly fine, as long as you acknowledge that the other type of fantasy is also a valid interpretation. (I mean, the original fairy tale features the stepsisters getting their feet mutilated and all three of them getting their eyes pecked out, so go for it.)

Why isn't Cinderella more proactive in general? Because she's a child who has been abused for the back half of her life, who has had to be focused on survival because. you know. she's an abused kid.

How did she dance in glass slippers? Gotta agree with you there man, that's weird.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

random percy headcanons:

wants to be the photographer friend SO bad and he technically is but like 70% of the pics come out blurry or weird bc there was a monster attack in the middle of them. his instagram is truly so chaotic looking.

literally always has seashells on him someone will ask him for a pencil or spare change and he has to empty all his pockets of shells to find it. drops his backpack and a bunch of shells fall out. kicks his shoes off and sand and shells fly out and his mortal friends are like percy What the Fuck

his eyes glow underwater!! bioluminescent king. no one told him though and he didn't find out until he joined his school's swim team and terrified everyone (he managed to convince them his contacts were having a weird reaction to chlorine lmao)

he really likes art!! he doesn't just pretend to for rachel's sake he genuinely enjoys painting with her. he likes splatter paint, collages and pop art styles the best. one day after splitting some edibles they realized percy could manipulate water colors and went CRAZY with it

will ask to be excused during class and comes back like an hour later with scorch marks all over his face bleeding from one of his ears covered in dust missing three fingernails rips in his jeans and a fat lip and the teacher is like percy what the actual hell were you doing in the bathroom all this time and he's just like uhhhhhh I have ibs

the brand from camp jupiter did unfortunately (for sally) Unlock something in him lmfao he keeps getting shitty little tattoos. usually stick-n-poke but someone's friends cousin's girlfriend's brother has a gun that gets brought to parties every now and then. most of them are sloppy but you can tell what they are HOWEVER he has one that was supposed to be a seal that came out looking like one of those shitty ms paint crying memes. annabeth laughed at him for ten minutes straight when she saw it.

he wanted to dye his hair blue but he was too chicken to bleach his entire head so he just did the tips. his hair is curly though so it looks absolutely ridiculous but he loves it

percy and annabeth get a crusty little yappy white dog in college and he carries it around like a baby lmao

back to his chaotic instagram, he's got so many pics of him like, relaxing at the bottom of the mariana trench or hugging a giant squid or riding on a whale shark and his mortal friends all think he's just really good at photoshop and this is a very specific bit he decided to commit to. they're always like lol percy where do you even FIND these pictures are you subscribed to like scientific journals for the laughs? but no he just took them all on his shell phone

has an ongoing prank war with annabeth's little brothers bobby and matthew but like it's Unhinged. they're playing 5D chess and she has no idea whats going on

weird tshirts!!! he loves them! like

shit like this or those 'women want me fish fear me' shirts, anything with a funny or incomprehensible slogan is going in his closet right along with his band tees lmfao

bought estelle a panda pillow pet when she was born 🥺

can NOT bring himself to eat seafood no matter how many times poseidon has told him its fine. he's like NO these are my FRIENDS JONATHAN WAS TELLING ME ABOUT HIS GRANDDAUGHTERS WEDDING LITERALLY YESTERDAY WHY IS HE ON A PLATTER DAD. they had to give up and just start eating normal land food at the palace every time he comes to visit lmfao

gets into horsegirl antics with hazel she NEEDS to know everything the horses have to say. they spend hours gossiping in the stables.

movie nights in the poseidon cabin were 10000% a thing and when he was missing annabeth and thalia and grover (and a few others) would still sleep in there every now and then and talk about how much they miss him :(

percy and beckendorf had the worlds most elaborate handshake

he DOES impulse buy stuff just because they're ocean-themed. stuffed animals, home decor, school supplies, clothes, you name it he bought it if theres like a fish on it

has more scars from crashing off his skateboard than he does from monster attacks

grover is somehow the only person who's ever noticed percy is severely claustrophobic

has a deep passion for adele. I can't explain this one I just feel and know it to be true.

he and annabeth both proposed to each other at the same time and they were SO mad about it they kept yelling over each other's speeches lmao

he can SING but he doesn't know it. sally keeps trying to record him singing to himself but something always happens to the camera and she loses the evidence

called chiron a brony one time and mr d thought it was so funny he was nice to percy for an entire week

the camp keeps trying to convince him to teach sword fighting lessons to the younger kids but he can NOT bring himself to swing a sword at a 9 year old so he keeps getting injured

has the most complicated iced coffee order in the world his go-to local coffee shop finally just put the damn drink on the menu and named it after him

he IS the quiet kid in the back of your math class that always has his hood up to try and hide his headphones and eats increasingly elaborate meals out of his backpack when the teacher isn't looking. one time someone caught him with a rotisserie chicken in the middle of a geometry final.

he argued that he DID have enough to share with the class

currently obsessed with the image of him knocking back a container of sea salt as if it was a shot and his mortal friends being like hey! what the actual fuck! and he's just like uhhhhh anemia kills!

its his birthday<3

[jpitha]

Hunting

It is unlikely that humans are the only predator species to achieve sapience in the galaxy.

In order to be a successful predator one has to be intelligent enough to learn your prey's movements and be able to think ahead to what they're going to do next but also be flexible enough in your thinking that you can improvise if the situation chances. If you don't have this elasticity, you won't be a very successful predator.

Humans are very successful predators.

****

Greg bent down low and spoke as quietly as he could to the worried Sefigan next to him. "I need you to stay as still as you can. I'm going to go around, and try and surprise the Gren guarding the exit."

The three Sefigans, caught between wanting to obey Greg and staying silent but also trying to communicate that they thought it was suicide to do so started shaking.

"No, no, it'll be fine. I've been watching him. He's not really paying attention." Greg stood silently and put one finger to his lips, then smiled.

Moving much quieter than one would think given his mass, Greg crept away, hunched down just a little to keep motion out of the tops of the bushes they used to hide. The Sefigans watched in horrified fascination as Greg would take a few steps and then freeze, not even breathing while he watched the Gren.

As he walked, he made no noise at all over the soft sand, his feet finding purchase slowly. The Sefigans, a small furry prey species from a rocky mountainous world felt very old fears from the most early parts of their brains while watching him hunt the Gren.

The Gren guard was panning slowly as he guarded the exit, his fur flat, his eyes dull and his mouthparts drooping. If one knew a bit about Gren physiology one could easily see that he was bored and tired. His shift wasn't due to end for another 3 demi-cycles and nothing usually ever happened on this exit.

When Greg was no more than 2 meters away, he reached down and picked up a stone, no larger than a comm badge. He raised his arm and in one silent fluid motion, tossed the stone high and far over his head, to hide its origin. It clattered against the wall on the far side of the pen, opposite to where Greg was standing. The noise and motion caught the Gren's eye and his whole body swung over to where the stone landed.

His back was turned to Greg.

Greg bent his legs low building energy and took two steps and lept onto the Gren's back. His higher mass bowled the taller but much lighter Gren over and the Gren's head hit the stone with a hollow thwack.

Greg jumped up off the Gren and checked him quickly. He was dead. Trotting quickly over to where the Sefigans were still hiding he motioned for them to follow.

Still terrified, they followed this... ambush predator they were scared of and by the time they reached him, he had gotten the comm out of the Gren's pack and was fiddling with a ring that had complicated studs all around it, fitting them against the door until one clicked and the door hissed open.

Minutes later they were all running across the desert to the canal below where they had hoped to cling to the side of a barge and float to the spaceport.

"Human Greg! Human Greg!" The smallest Sefigan called as they jogged down the sandy hill towards the canal.

"What is it Li? Can it wait?"

"That was amazing! I've never seen a human hunt before! Is that how they all do it?"

"Not really? Humans developed as persistence hunters, not ambush hunters, but as you well know, skills can be taught."

"Persistence hunter?"

"Yeah, my ancestors would pick an animal out of a herd and run after it. As long as we didn't overexert ourselves we could just... run until it died."

The three Sefigans looked at each other as they jogged. Greg wasn't breathing heavily as they went towards the canal, but all three of them were nearly at their limit and would need a long time to rest when they were safe.

"Human Greg, you scare us." The tallest Sefigan looked back at the holding compound and then back at Greg. "But, not as much as we were scared of what the Gren would have done to us."

Greg smiled showing his wide, large, white teeth. "In this world, sometimes you need to be scary." He looked at the canal. "Come on, the water isn't too cold, let's get in and swim towards that barge. It's not too far."

[banamine-bananime]

Growing up I lived in an area with a lot of cattle farming and I was very scared of the cows. Do you have any cool facts that will make me either more or less afraid of cows?

oh hmm let me think on that!

facts related to how to interact with cows so all parties feel and stay safe:

they have a very prey herd animal mentality. they want to move with their herdmates. they want to watch any potential threats like people and move away from them. they don't like loud or unfamiliar noises (they're sensitive souls. sometimes if i visit a dairy wearing waterproof coveralls where the cows are only used to people wearing cotton coveralls, just the whisper of waterproof pants rubbing against each other can spook them) or abrupt movements or going into areas they can't see well (and they have difficulty with depth perception due to their wide-set eyes for 300 degree vision, and with high-contrast, so going from sun into shade or vice versa can look like stepping into a white or black void for them and they don't like it)

based on this, we know the keys to low-stress cattle handling are consistency in how you interact with them, calmness (small movements, quiet words to let them know you're there), moving cows in groups big enough to have friends but small enough you can control the whole group without them milling around or the ones in front stopping and causing a traffic jam, and slowly moving them by just barely getting in their "bubble" of "whoa, you're a little too close for comfort, i'm going to move in the other direction" without ever getting into their "YIKES RUN AWAY FROM THIS THING" bubble

the last point involves understanding pressure and flight zones and point of balance:

from Mississippi State University Extension:

from grandin.com (highly recommend as a source of information about animal behaviour and welfare!!! temple grandin my idol since i was like nine i love her so. and i tear up when i think about how much she's done for millions of animals ;_; she's a genius and no lie revolutionized low-stress handling):

pet cows that get doted on enough to bond with people may not see people as a threat so the normal ways we use pressure zones to iinteract with cows don't necessarily do anything for them. you would lead them more like a horse, using a halter. or lure them with treats.

beef cows typically have little contact with people, often just processing (vaccines, preg checks, quick exam for any health problems) a couple times a year, so they can be very wild. doesn't mean they're aggressive, the overwhelming majority are non-aggressive but they have very large flight zones, so if you don't recognize that and approach too quickly, getting deep in their flight zone, that can get you into a dangerous situation where they get aggressive as a last resort. that said, they do usually still choose flight unless their calf is with them. "never get between mom and baby" applies as it does with any species

dairy cows are in between beef cows and pet cows. they interact with people regularly, several times per day, and it's respectful but not doting. kind of a business relationship with their handlers. they're not terrified of people by any means, but they haven't been, like, hand-fed treats to get over their instinctive wariness of potential-predator-like animals, and they know sometimes handling results in unpleasant experiences like medical treatment or pregnancy checks, so they avoid touch and have a flight zone, though it's small (and sometimes they'll calmly let you walk right up to them unrestrained, or approach you and lick you out of curiosity). very very rare to have an aggressive dairy cow (as in, one that attacks you instead of moving away when you're bothering them a little. really bothering them and ignoring body language when they can't move away is much more likely to get you kicked)

bulls are not docile. not every bull will be aggressive, but you should assume that every bull has the capacity to become aggressive with little provocation, and always keep a respectful distance and know your escape route if you have to be in a pen or field with them

cows love exploring with their tongues. any time you're in a dairy barn there's gonna be at least one friendly girl mlem mlem mlemming who won't leave you alone

adding on to the above, there is a slight caveat that you still have to be a LITTLE wary of friendly cows. 99% of the time they're just friendly but sometimes cows in heat will try to mount people. you don't have to be scared of friendly cows but if they're right next to you just keep them in your line of sight so you can move away if they make like they're going to mount. again, not common, never happened to me, but something to be aware of

signs of a happy, relaxed cow: lying down, chewing cud or eating, tail hanging down relaxed, moving slowly with her herd

signs of a slightly wary cow (you have entered the "pressure zone"): standing still/stopping what she's doing, turning towards you, ears turning towards you (watching the ears is a very good way of knowing what she's paying attention to), tail swishing or raised a bit away from body

signs of a distressed cow: vocalizing (they also moo for other reasons though), tail swishing, fidgeting/pawing/looking like she wants to move but doesn't know where to, freezing up and intermittently making erratic movements (back away a little)

signs of an aggressive cow: head down with attention on you, pawing ground, turning to show you their broad side. (turn sideways and calmly but swiftly walk away diagonally)

[yamujiburo]

Some of this might sound intentionally hostile in text and I apologize.

I'm saying this as an abuse survivor mind you - don't throw "abusive ships" under the bus so easily - at least, so long as they're not actually glamorizing the abuse. I lived that irl and I personally find someone overcoming it, slowly having enough of that bullshit and getting out over time, and the other person having to wipe their own butt for once after they've made the damn mess, very refreshing. Maybe that's not a ship in the traditional sense. It's no happily ever after bc it shouldn't be, but I find stories like mine shyed away from so often because even the portrayal gets considered a "canon ship". ... that's just how media works now, I guess? I very rarely See a fictional relationship not called a ship in literally any context now so that's the definition I'm running on.

I wish more people were willing to portray the hardships of finding acceptance outside of "whoever you can find will accept you" very much, and finding the better things after. I wish people weren't terrified out of portrayimg situations like mine.

Jessie.. is not a good person in canon. You expect me to believe she moved into to hanamusa seamlessly, without falling on her ass? I never see you talk about Jessie's abusive tendencies in canon. You never talk about the inherent meanness she needed to get over to get there. She's quite aml lot like my ex in canon, actually.

What do you mean you're going to just remove from the character that she is abusive to those around her. Jessie hits people. She takes her own junk out on others all the time. Do you even like the character then, are you actually invested in her growing, or are you just making an OC at this point?

Idk. Do you, boo. But you are posting about a character who, whether you like it or not, is canonically abusive. I just don't buy that dating Ash's mom alone fixed her. That isn't... How that works. It would be excellent if it did. Part of my love of hanamusa is that it signals Jessie's change - but she could have changed for anyone before now.

What makes Delia different? How is she specifically a turning point for Jessie? Because Jessie's flaws go well beyond just bossing people around.

I would love if my abuser had the same outcome as your Jessie. I adore your portayals of hanamusa, where she's still flawed but still strives to do better. That's all I ever wanted from my ex.

What the fuck got her there tho.

Anyways I've been watching a lot of Bojack Horseman lately -

I agree with you! I don't think abusive relationships (or any tough subject matter in general) should be shied away from in media. It can be powerful when executed well and written by folks who are equipped to tell those kinds of stories. I do think it's sad when people treat it as off limits. But the ask I got was definitely more about which ships I have where I actually like the relationship between the characters. I think the semantics of the word "ship" are kind of vague or rather, over time, got so specific to only mean "absolutely love together and want them as endgame" (for most people anyways). So that's usually what I take the word to mean when people ask me about it.

I can 100% appreciate how an abusive relationship is written and handled, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna ship an abuser with their victim (that falls into the glorifying you're talking about). Love Bojack Horseman! Big fan! I think the way they handled Bojack and Sarah Lynn was beautifully and tragically well written. But does that mean I ship Bojack and Sarah Lynn? Absolutely fucking not.

I've talked about Jessie's character plenty on this blog and the way she's handled in earlier seasons specifically. This is kind of a summary: If we look at it on surface level, yes we can say she was abusive. But I think it's important to acknowledge and take into account the medium, time period and culture. Slapstick and cartoon violence was HUGE in anime and animation in the 90s (and prior to that too). Characters were always cartoonishly slapping each other around with giant mallets, folding fans, etc. Looney Tunes style. These slapstick bits were always distinct from real abuse and hurt (for Pokémon, Jessiebelle comes to mind). Mean slapstick wasn't a character trait exclusive to Jessie either. We saw it in Misty, James, Meowth, characters of the day and pretty much any character who got mad. It was a visual shortcut to show anger.

This type of slapstick has since (thankfully) died out and it hasn't really been a part of the Pokémon franchise since the early 2000s. However, Jessie was a notably special case. One of my favorite fun facts about the Pokémon anime is that there was a point in the series where Megumi Hayashibara (Jessie/Musashi's seiyuu) told the writers that moving forward, she no longer wanted Jessie to be violent or to be shown hitting James or Meowth (source: her memoir "The Characters Taught Me Everything"). She thought it directly went against the vision Takeshi Shudo had for Jessie, James and Meowth, when he created them, which was that they are good natured villains. If you watch from DP and on, Jessie never lays a hand on either of them. I think it was a such a good move on Pokémon's part to change her character like that and I'm forever grateful that Hayashibara said something! Whenever I write Jessie now, I always keep that in mind. She's mean, shouty and stupid but would never genuinely hurt those she cares about.

From then, her character becomes much more bearable. She's still bossy, mean and vain (typical cartoon villainess attributes) but I'd hesitate to say abusive. She'll still yell at James and Meowth, they all yell at each other, but in more of a sibling way (imo) rather than a "i'm actively trying to hurt your feelings way". The show makes a point especially in later seasons to show that Jessie, James and Meowth are not beyond being redeemed. From conception the whole POINT of the Team Rocket trio was that they are redeemable but their persistence and obsession keeps getting in the way of them seeing that there's a better life for them out there.

I won't deny that Jessie was unsavory in earlier seasons, but when I write her, I choose to write the version that Takeshi Shudo and Megumi Hayashibara had envisioned from the get go. She's still incredibly flawed and makes plenty missteps but wants to be better as you stated! My favorite part about Jessie is that she's a piece of shit LOL and I enjoy writing the changes she goes through to be better (but then still showing her default so some of her evil tendencies). In this AU, Delia doesn't fix Jessie. Jessie fixes Jessie because she is with someone makes her want to be a better person. She's already in the middle of turning over a new leaf before even meeting Delia, after leaving Team Rocket. Writing Jessie as legitimately abusive I think could work, but that's not my story to tell and if someone who were more equipped to tell that story did, I'd be very interested to take a listen!

I hope this doesn't come off as trying to deny or invalidate your experience. If you see that in Jessie, I hear you! This is just how I've interpreted her character over the years, having watched every episode of Pokémon and reading Japanese interviews from the cast and crew. She's such a compelling character and I love how messy she is

[ranticore]

so what exactly is a 'crawling beast of the earth' and why did harpies have to develop such extreme modifications just to defend against them?

nobody really knows what the crawling beasts are except the wyrms, and they're not telling anyone. the beasts take many forms but commonly they are eyeless and worm-like with large jaws but no mouths. they do not eat, they show no signs of intelligence, and it seems that all they do is crawl and bite. their bodies have a high heavy metal content and by their very presence they leach toxic waste into the earth around their burrows that destroys organic life. although nobody really knows what they are or where they came from, it's universally acknowledged that crawling beasts are not monsters or natural animals. monsters - not animals - are able to physically touch a crawling beast without being poisoned and you can kill one by ripping it to shreds, but the easiest way to kill one is to throw their bodies on a pyre.

in terms of behaviour they seem to show no response to injury or environmental stimulus but always crawl or burrow towards the highest concentration of large living creatures they can sense (through means unknown). if one gets within biting distance they will bite.. even if there's a layer of topsoil between you and them. they do not notice others of their own kind and can mindlessly form huge aggregations underneath villages or settlements, fouling one another until eventually the sheer volume and mass of the pile-up spills onto the surface.

the purpose of the beasties, in this setting, is to provide a common enemy that can be a catalyst for human and monster cooperation. they're kind of a macguffin that makes everything else happen, but i like them because they're undefined and terrifying for everybody. one big crawler will destroy a field of crops in one night and make the soil barren, and that can be the difference between making it through the winter and starving, in a small village. crawlers are the reason flighted harpies fear touching the ground. the whole land is infested with them (the sea, too) and their numbers are only growing.

for most harpies, attaining the size and strength (and talons) necessary to fight a crawling beast would reduce their ability to neatly and accurately forage or hunt their normal animal prey. so instead of everyone developing this weaponry, instead only one guy in a flock does, and thereafter he's the flock's bodyguard. kings suck at hunting and foraging. because even regular eagle harpies are naturally pretty big and pointy, they are the first choice for human falconers who want a partner who can swoop down, snatch up a crawling beast, and drop it on a fire. solitary monsters fare the best here since they usually don't attract any crawling beasties, except when they're pressganged by humans (or other monsters) into helping the general pest control effort.

only wyrms are known to hunt and eat crawling beasts.

[fantasy-anatomy-analyst]

I hope I'm not asking too many questions... but I really love the skywhale trope and wanted to hear your thoughts on them?

i think we need more variety of whales in the sky! seems like more people go for a blue whale or humpback whale design on their sky whales, which is fine because they are very iconic whales and i love the way they look. but how about some beaked or toothed whales? flying orcas? a bowhead? i think a sky whale that looked like a bowhead whale would be just wonderful, look at this thing.

(image description: first is an underwater photo of a bowhead whale's face. the top of its mouth is very narrow while the bottom of it is enormous, like a pelican. there is a white patch at the front of its lower jaw with black spots in a line across it. the second image is a detailed illustration of the whale's whole body, comparing it to the size of an elephant and showing the shape of its fins and tail. the elephant is roughly the size of the whale's lower jaw. end description.)

i love this thing. look at that face. the humpback whale may have longer and prettier fins for that sky whale aesthetic, but the bowhead's face shape is delightful. more diversity in sky whale designs!

but of course, the more interesting thought is how exactly to make such an enormous vertebrate work as a flying animal. where is it going? what does it eat? what happens when it dies?

it would be more realistic for sky whales to be smaller, but when people think of sky whales, they want the huge size! it's a fantasy, we want the epic huge flying creatures with their strange singing calls swimming through the clouds. so i'm not going to talk about the more logical small flying whales that go around in flocks to hunt birds (though the idea of smaller flying dolphins is also delightful!) I'm going to just talk about big slow baleen sky whales, the most iconic and desired of all sky whales.

step one: how the heck are these things in the air. it's easier to explain how a dragon can fly, they have big powerful wings. how do whales fly? I think the clearest answer is that they have some form of massive internal air sac full of lifting gas. real life oceanic whales are full of blubber, but maybe sky whales don't have as much blubber and get a lot of their size from their big air sacs instead.

lifting gas is just an umbrella term for any gases that are lighter than the standard atmospheric air. this includes heated atmospheric air, hydrogen, helium, coal gas, ammonia, and methane. (according to wikipedia) and with that list I think we've found our answer. whales are actually even-toed ungulates like cows. they could easily produce a lot of methane with the right diet. they'd just keep it in their air sacs instead of releasing it as a waste material! and for the best production of methane, these sky whales should have multi-chambered stomachs.

This does mean they're probably going to eat a lot of plant matter! so imagine them swooping low to take huge mouthfuls of tree tops! terrifying! maybe their baleen is structured to scrape the leaves off the branches. Maybe they swoop down to kelp forests in the ocean and take huge mouthfuls of that as well. any critters they happen to consume in the process are just bonus snacks full of protein. they likely also consume large flocks of small birds on the go, and probably clouds of flying insects too! locust swarms, for example. watch out for the low flying whales! I think they'd be slow like blimps and mostly use their tails and fins to steer and swoop down for food. they probably also rub themselves on tree branches or mountain sides to scratch their itches. I bet they'd have a symbiosis with many bird species that pick off their parasites.

like cow manure, sky whale dung could be a great source of fertilizer. best to avoid the usual paths of migrating sky whales so you don't end up dead by having giant poop clumps fall on you, but once it's hit the ground, that's free whale manure for every farmer in the area. the lands along the paths of migrating sky whales are probably very fertile, which also serves the whales, since they'll be eating the leafy tree tops! and when a whale dies, falling to the ground, the resulting small earthquake would certainly be startling, and both the impact and the rot process would cause a lot of damage to the surrounding land.

things are not immediately fertilized when a corpse rots. it takes a while! the rot causes more harm at first and then starts to nourish the ground later.

and dead bodies tend to bloat with gases and i have already established that these whales are full of methane. a lot of it would be released at death anyway, and i don't think the whale would drop immediately. or perhaps they fly lower in their old age and just crash land and die slowly. either way, these things are huge and full of methane and then they bloat. which means they might also explode spontaneously as part of the decay process. the air for miles around is going to be so nasty. but i think if you live in sky whale territory, you're just going to have to get used to the stink, because the manure that falls on a more regular basis is also going to be so so stinky.

like real world whale falls, sky whale falls will attract absolutely every carnivorous creature in the area. anything that eats meat will follow that awful stench right to the source and start gnawing away at the thick skin. people will have the easiest time, since they have tools for this beyond just their teeth and claws. the faster the whale is cut open, the less likely there will be an explosive bloat stage, so I'm sure the culture of the region would have some superstitions about leaving a dead whale lying too long. if you don't go harvest that bounty, it will explode and you never know where those chunks will land.

and then when there's only bones, people use em for building all sorts of things! the societies that exist in the paths of sky whales would be very cool to see.

that turned into a ramble and I haven't even designed a sky whale lol. lemme doodle one real quick.

(image description: a sketch of a sky whale, which resembles the aforementioned bow whale, swooping down to munch on trees in a forest. end description.)

[crevicedwelling]

I have a pretty bad fear of wasps. Nothing crippling, I can observe them from a distance just fine, but it does make being outside on warm, sunny days a stressful experience. I want to work on it, because I know they're just like any other animal: they're just minding their own business 99% of the time, they're not out to get you, and they deserve a place on this world as much as any other. And I know some can even learn to recognize/"befriend" people, which I think is super cool. I actually followed your blog partially because you post about wasps and I knew it would help to regularly expose myself to wasps that way.

I still sometimes freeze up or get really jumpy when I see a wasp near me. But I can tell I've been getting better. Just the other day I went to the Renaissance Festival and was carrying around a big cup of mead (a.k.a. wasp attractant) and, yeah, I was followed by a couple wasps. At one point two of them just hung out on the inside of the cup for like five solid minutes licking it clean.

If it weren't for your blog I would've been so terrified I probably would've thrown the cup onto the ground and waited from like twenty feet away for the wasps to leave. But I DIDN'T. I carried it around with me and patiently (and anxiously) waited for the wasps to fly away whenever they did show up.

It's really hard to make myself just stay still when I see a wasp near me. Earlier today I could only do so for maybe 30 seconds before I had to stand up and wait nearby for it to leave. But I'm really trying to get over that fear, and I'm slowly getting better, and I think I owe your blog quite a bit in that regard. So, thank you.

I believe the most common wasp here (at least, the one I was dealing with in those two anecdotes) is some kind of Vespula yellowjacket, probably Vespula maculifrons. So... I dunno, if you have any fun facts or pictures or videos about yellowjackets (either V. maculifrons or yellowjackets in general), I'd love to hear/see those. And if not, that's okay too <3

I think a fun fact that most don’t appreciate about yellowjackets is how much they parasitize one another!

Vespula maculifrons here is a widespread, common species in eastern North America. queens of this species do the usual overwinter under log, find a hole, make a nest deal. they scavenge, they hunt, they feed on nectar. pretty standard Vespula.

V. squamosa is a species that’s very common locally, and when you see workers out and about they act much like other yellowjackets. however, their queens (no photo) are huge, hornet-sized orange wasps quite different from the workers. curiously, V. squamosa don’t make their own nests about 85% of the time. instead, most of those big bruiser queens wait a few weeks longer to come out of hiding, and track down a new Vespula maculifrons nest founded earlier in spring. she’ll march into the smaller species’ nest, chew the original queen to pieces, and bully her daughter workers into submission. she then lays her own eggs in the nest, and produces her own workers who forage alongside the V. maculifrons workers, and over time the colony becomes only made up of V. squamosa. V. squamosa will even take over nests that have already been usurped by another facultative parasite, V. flavopilosa, which usually targets V. maculifrons as well!

in the warmera south, V. squamosa nests can become massive superstructures housing dozens of queens, used year after year. if you’ll allow me a moment of poetic speculation, most of these ancient castles must therefore contain the remnants of a tiny V. maculifrons nest at their core, the gnawed ruins of a conquered house.

[tumb1rprincess]

Random Thoughts About the Magnus Archives

I feel like something's being said about your personality depending on which avatars you like and which ones you want to drop dead, I just don't know what. Like, anytime Peter showed up, I'd be like "You're a bitch ass, go away." But anytime distortion Michael made an appearance, I'd be like "That's my baby boy!" And there are a few that are kind of in between. Like with Nikola, I was like "You freak me the fuck out, but you're funny, so I guess that evens it out."

I think it's so interesting how despite a lot of the characters not getting any physical descriptions, a lot of artists in the fandom draw them the same way. Like, Melanie almost always has colorful hair, usually blue. Jon's hair gets longer with every season. Helen is almost always wearing purple. I just wonder how everyone unanimously agreed on some of this stuff.

I thought the Leitner rant was a canon thing, so I avoided anything about it 'cause I wanted to be surprised. I think near the end of the series though I finally looked it up and I was like "What!? This was a fan thing?" Totally hilarious though, I kind of felt the same way about Leitner.

The inside jokes are fucking hilarious, like the "homophobic vase." Or we have classics like "I just listened to the episode where the guy has sex with a bug." "Oh, which one?" and "Peter and Elias are definitely divorced."

Seeing what episodes scared people and which ones had people going "Actually, that sounds kind of nice" was very interesting. Like, episode 57 where the guy was stuck all alone in space? Emotionally destroyed me. But then others would be like "Yo, being able to be all alone in space with no one to bother me? Sign me up."

Also interesting to see which Fears scared people the most and which ones they think they would end up serving. I think the Buried scared me the most. Episodes 15, 132, and 195 freaking terrified me. I'd probably end up serving the Lonely, I remember thinking "Oh, that's me," with a lot of episodes, particularly episodes 159, 170, 186. It was a weird combination of "I'm in this statement and I don't like it" and "I actually feel seen." Like a weird mix of being called out and also kind of validated because I felt like my thoughts and feelings were finally being put into words and that meant somebody else had gone through the same thing.

What were some popular fan theories that ended up not coming true? I think I saw somewhere that a lot of people were theorizing that Martin would join the Web before he ended up serving the Lonely instead. People often say Gravity Falls fans grew up to be Magnus Archives fans and I remember Gravity Falls fans going crazy with some of the theories. And even if some of them ended up not happening, they're still really interesting.

I love how a lot of the characters do shitty things, but you completely understand why. Like, Melanie's wrong for blaming Jon for a lot of things that go wrong, but you understand that she feels trapped like an animal in a cage, so she's just lashing out. Or Tim is kind of an asshole in season 3, but you understand because he went through a lot of the same trauma that Jon did, he's just reacting with anger instead of paranoia.

I've been watching a lot of fan animations for this show and a lot of the comments are like "I checked out the Magnus Archives because of this video!" And the same thing happened to me too. Did you guys see any fan animations that made you decide to give this show a go?

When people draw Jon with long hair, they draw him like he’s the prettiest man alive and I love it. That or ends up looking like Jesus or Bruno Madrigal

I see every day things like a spiral shaped object or a spider and I jokingly think “Is that a Magnus Archives reference?” Or I’ll be listening to a song and think “Hmm, that could go in a Lonely playlist” or “Ooo, that so fits with the Vast.”

[caineinthecorner]

Hi. I binged like 80 chats in a row and I have opinions(tm) about physical strength and general power stuff of the brothers. Mostly just strength related things, but I tried to cover most of their battle stuff.

Yes I know, yes I know, "they're ranked as siblings by power blabla", but that's LAME. So here are my personal takes mostly for fun. Canon is dead and I ate it.

Also I finished the dividers and general aesthetics of this blog woo

★ Lucifer.

Generally the strongest, period, can and WILL kill almost anyone without much issue or even second thought

Physical strength, however? He’s not the best, as he doesn’t rely on it at all for battle / conflict

He didn't need it in heaven, after all

(Beel was his brawns and he was already a powerful angel so it never was a requirement)

I don't see him actively working out (anymore, at least), so most of his strength is merely his baseline

His main tactic conflict wise is intimidation.

Cough giving MC death threats cough

Very prideful of himself in battle, obviously

Rarely would ever use any sort of dirty tricks

Would probably prefer to go down the "honorable way"

Target his brothers though and he WILL play every trick in the book with little regard to his pride or his own life

This fuck looks like he knows swordsmanship and is probably the only of the brothers who does so

(except maybe Satan who is learning just to copy / be better than him)

Either that or he knows fancy sword dances for angel rituals he cannot partake in anymore (and doesn't do them anymore)

Diavolo has photos of him doing said dances but his lips are triple sealed since it is a heavily touchy subject

★ Mammon.

Canonically this man is physically weak (or at least has a weak complexion / scrawny arms)

Probably the most disappointing in terms of strength because he is literally the second born

His saving grace is his unholy speed and dirty tricks, using it to cover his weaknesses / lack of physical strength.

A LOT of dirty tricks and bs magic stuff. So so many. Never ends

He’s the living embodiment of the “random bullshit go!!!” meme

You know Looney tunes? Yeah this man has the Bugs bunny's levels of bullshit

But he has the best stamina out of his brothers (so he can run away from his debts)

Doesn't train because he's already perfect as it is (<- that's his ego talking he can barely pick up the weights at Beel's gym)

Honor is for the dead type of person. Nothing is out of the table in battle

(^ that makes him terrifying to fight against btw)

He either tries to intimidate (imitating Lucifer) or sweet-talk his way out of conflict

It usually just pisses off his adversary more which actually leads to the fights starting, but hey, he tried 乁⁠(⁠ ⁠•⁠_⁠•⁠ ⁠)⁠ㄏ

★ Leviathan.

Physical strength is shit.

he will get his shit kicked if he tries to brawl with almost anyone

Except maybe the lowest hanging fruit (humans)

Magical or general strength is decent, but he's definitely not the greatest in battle out of the brothers

^ he's kinda insecure about this and he wishes he were stronger (he sulks about it)

Wishes that actual irl battles were like Fire Emblem or strategy games bcs he's actually good in those

Update: I didn't make it clear (mb lol) but I see him as the best strategist of the brothers by far, he just isn't good at front-line action

^ Being away from the front lines keeps the pressure away from him for the most part, and it avoids him getting riled up and acting rash

He once tried to workout with Beel but quickly got overwhelmed because Beel shoved 200kg weights onto him thinking it was an reasonable starting point

So he kinda has trauma(tm) about it

Despite his garbage physical prowess, he WILL start fights and get riled up easily

He goes onto his demon form immediately when he wants to fight

^ bcs his strength isn't great, and he needs any boost he can get

Plus, awful anger management

My man will get onto a fist fight with the demon equivalent of a redditor over anime waifus and he will lose

★ Satan.

As the literal embodiment of Wrath, he does pack quite a punch and will maul you to death with only his fists. No problems at all

But that's merely his baseline strength (which is a lot) since he doesn’t really train physically

Probably focuses on other areas (read: intelligence) instead of physical strength.

Which is ironic because he could kick Lucifer's ass in a fist fight if he actually trained more

But oh well. Books do be booking

Surprisingly strategic while in fights, although not above Going Apeshit

Funnily enough the least likely of the brothers to enter a fight

Has read The Art Of War and will quote it just to be a smartass

★ Asmodeus.

Physically? Weak.

Probably the weakest of the brothers, having more or less the strength of a human (and on the weaker side of that).

He doesn’t train whatsoever; Likes his slender figure and muscles “ruin” that.

However, he makes up for it on the "trickster" scale.

As the Avatar of Lust, he will probably go the charm route instead of wanting to directly fight his enemies, or he make someone else do the dirty work for him.

Think of Mammon but make it a bit less scummy, tricks wise.

His go-to is sweet talk.

Something something the Avatar of Lust being physically weak since sex is considered an act of vulnerability and therefore the lowering of one’s guard something something

Something something the poetic narrative of the Avatar of Lust having only power through Communication something something

★ Beelzebub.

Contrary to Asmo; he does lift for days and can pack quite the punch, being one of the stronger brothers physically despite being one of the youngest.

I don't see him caring much for magic or other types of strength, he is content in packing the punch and has the capabilities to back him up.

Fight wise he will probably punch the problems away

Maybe use one or two tricks he’s learned

Mostly relies on his intuition and gut and it surprisingly works out

Nothing fancy; Dictionary definition of all muscle no brain battle wise

Literally one of the scariest brothers to ever fight he will actually beat you to a bloody pulp

And make a smoothie out of it

★ Belphegor.

This fucker doesn't lift at all you can't tell me shit

At MOST he'll accompany Beel to the gym and would sleep at the benches

The strength he has is the strength he was born with

Which isn't a lot, but still above human average by quite a lot

More or less demon standard of strength. Maybe a slightly below it

But he's still above most demons by a mile in other regards, mostly magic prowess

He's stronger than Levi because I think it would be hilarious that the dude who sleeps all day is stronger than him

(or you can make him really physically strong just because it'd be funny to see the sleepy dude kick ass)

(either way is funny as shit go ham)

★ Physical strength chart

Behemoth type strength :

Beel (only barely)

Lucifer

Satan

High / Low above human average :

Mammon

Belphie (low diff w/ mammon)

Levi

Asmo

★General strength chart

Can kill hundreds no effort :

Lucifer

Satan (If apeshit)

Are not as strong but still terrifying :

Mammon

Beel

Belphie

Levi, Asmo (Tie)

[artist-issues]

You know... it also just seems really weird that Disney has been going out of it's way to subvert everything from its past.

If I put myself in the mind of "everything we were founded on, and everything we create before ~2016 was bad" I don't see why I'd keep going. Like... if Disney thinks Disney sucks, why be Disney? (money IG)

You're right! It must be a very discouraging thing to work for Disney nowadays, if you're the kind of person to think about legacy, or occupy your daily thoughts with some degree of foresight.

The truth is, there is a part of Disney that is successful because it was innovative--it raised the bar and set the culture.

But there's also a part of Disney that is trying to guess what the culture likes, and capitalize on that popularity--the culture tells it what to do.

That's all organizations. Some are brave and say, "no, this is who we are and what we believe, and you can take it or leave it." And usually the culture takes it, because the culture is inspired by strong leadership and clear identities.

But then they get a big following. And it's almost impossible for the organization that used to shape the culture to do anything but become terrified that they'll lose that culture. So then they start making decisions based out of fear, and self-glorification, and insecurity--the total opposite of the confident, bold, innovative identity it used to have.

Disney used to say "oh you think cartoons are just gags? Let me invent the first ever animated feature film--in color! See you in the National Film Registry, skeptics."

It used to say, "oh, you critics think all my fairy tale and animal movies are too light? That they've got no weight to help the kids face real life? Let me make a smash-hit about a Nanny who convinces a work-and-harsh-realities-obsessed father that what his children really need is a spoonful of sugar. Because yeah, life's hard, but that's why we make the job a game."

It used to say, "you think the animated genre died with Walt? You think everyone would rather watch George Lucas movies than a cartoon fairy tale? Let me introduce you to an Academy Award-winning Princess story we call the Little Mermaid. You can stop digging our grave; we just saved animation."

It used to say "you think it can't be done? Hold my mouse ears." And it just did it. And didn't care if audiences said silly, shallow things like "girls don't need to be rescued by a prince!!1!" Or "grown-ups don't watch cartoons lol!!"

Nowadays, though? They're so big they don't know who they are anymore. And they're so big they're scared to lose anything, or take risks. I'm sure there's a lot of political pockets involved, too. They don't dare say anything but what the loudest, most complaining members of our society tell them to say.

They're no longer trend-setters and trail-blazers. They're a monument that is whatever the loudest people tells them to be. Has to suck, when you're the company that followed Walt's "Keep moving forward" motto.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

Someone uses the spell that turns them into an animal for a day. What are they and how do they react?

Undertale Sans - He's a blobfish. Welp. That happened. He can't really do anything about it. He's just... there. Strangely, though, he thinks it's not that bad. He's even a little sad when he has to go back to his normal form. It was an experience.

Undertale Papyrus - He's a goose. He's even more loud now, and scaring everyone around. To help Undyne realize he's Papyrus, he actually picks up a knife, to show her he's civilized. Undyne takes that as a threat and now Papyrus is running for his life, screaming, terrified she's going to roast him or something.

Underswap Sans - He's a sloth. He's so frustrated about this. He wants to do things, he really wants to! But everything is just... SLOW. SO SLOW. He wants to scream, run, and jump everywhere but just moving an arm is killing him. He's not going to survive. Please someone save him!

Underswap Papyrus - He's a Tenessee Fainting Goat. You know, these goats who faint at any source of stress? Welp. That doesn't change too much from usual. Except now Blue is having the fun of his life scaring the hell out of him just to watch him fall over, paralyzed. That's actually not funny :( He doesn't like it.

Underfell Sans - He's a very pissed-off hippopotamus. He can't think clearly anymore, all he knows is that he's angry and that he feels like he has to charge anything moving too close. He sent a lot of people to the hospital that day, including his brother and Undyne, then the King and the Queen they called in despair for help to control him. Red is the strongest monster ever created like that. But, as soon as he's returning to normal, he's in big trouble.

Underfell Papyrus - He's a shoebill. He has an angry face, he can makes gun noises with his mouth and he can stare right through your soul for hours. Everyone hates that. At least, it's fitting. Edge feels so powerful. He made three kids cry already and he intends to make many more run in fear before the end of the day.

Horrortale Sans - He's a big round panda. He doesn't know what to do with his body and won't stop knocking on everything in the house, despite Willow begging him to go outside. He just wants to curl up somewhere and sleep but he's just so big that nothing is comfortable. After some time, desperate, he goes outside and grabs a terrified cow to make a pillow.

Horrortale Papyrus - At this point, he thinks the universe hates him. He's a giraffe. Somehow, he's even taller than a normal giraffe. Obviously, since he can't hide because of his size, he got captured and pushed into a zoo, where an old giraffe matriarch didn't stop to parade to breed with him. He prefers to not talk about all of this anymore. Worst day of his life, he even got fined in the morning for entering the giraffe enclosure without any authorization, despite him screaming he was the giraffe all along. Hard day.

Swapfell Sans - He's a peacock. He was fine with it until Rus harassed him to fan his tail again and again and start making random people pay to enter HIS house to see him parade and take pictures. He's not against easy money, but he knows he won't see the color of that money and that's basically abusing his situation. So, after two hours, Nox decides he has enough and starts attacking the children, making them run in fear and terror. Once they're all gone, he attacks his brother lol. Rus has to hide in a tree to escape him. Nox waits for him silently on the floor, staring into his soul.

Swapfell Papyrus - He's an elephant seal... His nose is way too big and he can't do anything except rolling on himself and be loud to complain about the situation. He's too big to fit into the house, but he transformed there. He's literally stuck in the bathtub as Nox threw him there with blue magic to get him out of the way. He's splashing water pathetically, waiting for this nightmare to end.

Fellswap Gold Sans - He's a llama. He's mad. And he won't stop spitting at anyone really. Unfortunately, Coffee saw you can ride lamas on Minecraft and now they're wandering in the city because Wine can't say no to his brother, and certainly not like that. A police officer asks Coffee to put him on a muzzle because he's too dangerous and bite three people in the park who tried to touch him lol. Wine can't believe Coffee agreed. He feels so humiliated.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He's a fly.... Wine is so scare he might die he locks him in a jar for the day. Poor Coffee is flying in circles all day long, bored. It's not like he can even say he's bored so... Eventually, he falls asleep and spends the rest of the day. The only problem is that his foot stays stuck inside the jar when he grows up again and he has to go to the hospital to take it off lol.

[sketch-guardian]

Is it alright if I ask for all the RAD classmates with a child reader who’s kind of creepy

Like child mc wears maybe morute or Shiro Lolita and just doesn’t respond much, like everyone barely hears their voice because all they do is just stare and watch you with this creepy bear in their hands. It’s kinda like those creepy kids in horror movies

Of course it's alright✨there's no problem with such ask☺As usual, although I don't think there is any need to specify since it should be obvious, the headcanons with child MC are platonic and contain family dynamics, so the OCs in question are like child MC's legal guardians. Now let's start:

"RAD CLASSMATES+NEW EXCHANGE STUDENTS WITH A CREEPY CHILD MC"

DEMYA

I'm not sure how to explain this without trigger warnings, but Demya in the past, and even currently depending on the case, has devoured both humans and other demons, she was also raised in a tribe of bloodthirsty and flesh-eating demons, therefore she can be defined as...occasionally cannibal and it's very unlikely that a mere creepy child like MC would actually manage to disturb her, indeed Demya would even find child MC cute like a doll or they would remind her a bit of herself when she was welcomed by Azul and Domnra a long time ago, barely able to speak, with disheveled hair, deadpan eyes and mouth dripping with blood. Furthermore, Demya would instinctively understand what child MC would try to mean even if they don't communicate much, having personally experienced a non-verbal phase for a period of her life. Demya would also believe that child MC's staring is equivalent to studying a prey before attacking, a little like an animal, behavior that makes sense to her, even if Demya is more impulsive. If child MC would like to, Demya could teach them how to run on all fours or train them to be flexible, which for her would be pretty fun, in fact it would be hilarious to see people like Mammon or Levi terrified running away from child MC who chases them like a spider-

DOMNRA/MOBIM

Domnra has a fairly gothic/emo look so to speak, so although in terms of style it might seem at odds with child MC, he would appreciate the horror air that surrounds them, even if it would take him a while to get used to child MC's intense staring, which would sometimes make him uncomfortable. Domnra would have no problem understanding child MC's quiet way of communicating, used to Mobim expressing itself solely with gestures and squeaks, sometimes the three of them could even not speak at all and simply enjoy time together listening to some music or perhaps with some workouts, but very light things, like Domnra doing push-ups with Child MC and Mobim on his back. Furthermore, Domnra is still friends with Azul and Demya, which makes him automatically a dumbass, so in a rare playful mood, Domnra might find funny letting MC walk around with Mobim in their arms like a teddy bear, only to scare other people as soon as they realize the little curse moves and is alive. Speaking of which, Mobim would love to cuddle with child MC, not finding them creepy and it would play with their toys

AZUL

Azul floats around, walks through walls and some of his acquaintances are literally ghosts, plus he raised Demya when she was in her most uncivilized and feral state, so the silence wouldn't be a problem (he talks enough for both-) and child MC could never result disturbing for Azul, in fact since their clothing styles are similar, it could seem that they're trying to match or they could be really mistaken for a father with his child, which Azul wouldn't mind at all, he would find the opportunity to show off their family photos that he has in his wallet. Azul and child MC would go on little trips to haunted houses, he would also make their toys dance or float, and paint Victorian-style portraits of the two of them together. Would Azul make the pictures move to scare those who come to visit for shits and giggles? Obviously-

ZURI

Zuri would immediately notice child MC's peculiar behavior and that most would find it creepy, especially due to the intense staring and silence, however as long as child MC is healthy and happy, Zuri would pay no mind to it, she would also provide a plausible explanation to impertinent questions regarding MC's behavior. Zuri would be able to appreciate child MC's style and would contribute to the buying or weaving of clothes of their taste, then walking together through the streets of Devildom like two fashion icons. Zuri is the type to spoil child MC with gifts and trinkets, without exaggerating of course, but she would also make sure to decorate child MC's room to their liking. Moreover, Zuri would buy a notebook for child MC with which to communicate through writing or drawing

ODON

Odon involuntarily terrifies almost everyone they meet and their wide smile has often creeped out those around them. Odon has also been compared to the boogeyman several times and their past precedes them, instilling fear in beings who remember them, even though they have changed for the better, therefore a disturbing child MC would not even appear as such to Odon, on the contrary they would simply be surprised by the fact that child MC wants to spend time with them and that they aren't afraid, in a certain sense Odon could understand being judged for their own ways of acting. Odon likes to observe people as well, so them and child MC would share such hobby, spending time together. Odon's eye-like creatures would act as little bodyguards, understanding what child MC needs even before they attempt to communicate. Also Odon's style seems similar to dark cottagore, but they don't have a clear opinion on styles, whatever child MC likes is fine

REMIEL

Remiel, as an angel of death with little experience with the world of the living, has no idea what according to human custom is normal or not for a child and is hardly impressed by what people would deem scary, in general she's still slowly learning feelings and how to experience or show them, so she would treat child MC as she would any other child. Child MC's habit of staring at people would be fine for Remiel, because she also likes to learn how the world works and to do so sometimes you have to limit yourself to observing. Not gonna lie, a creepy child MC with Remiel, who looks as a corpse-like angel of death, would be disturbing to almost anyone, a real shame since both Remiel and child MC are innocent precious treasures. Despite her somber and gloomy nature, Remiel is very empathetic, although blunt, therefore she would understand when child MC tries to communicate. Remiel and child MC could occasionally be seen together wandering around libraries or graveyards to check if there are lost souls to help

NATHANIEL

Nathaniel in some ways wouldn't be too different from this version of child MC, both being taciturn and seemingly stoic enough to give off creepy vibes. Nathaniel would have boundless patience with child MC when they try to express themselves in words and if someone dared to interrupt them in the process, Nathaniel would politely but firmly remind that child MC was talking and would let them continue with some soft encouragement and reassurance. Nathaniel would probably teach child MC his way of communicating through gestures and nods, going so far as to understand each other even with just a glance, making others wonder if they are actually having a conversation telepathically. Nathaniel would also find child MC's style curious, almost reminding him of how some young angels dress

URIEL

The warrior angel would have no idea whether child MC's behavior is normal by human standards or what is typically creepy, however the question she would ask herself most frequently would be why child MC bothered to become attached to her, someone who doesn't have a very understanding attitude, but Uriel would be able to live with the idea with time. Uriel wouldn't care if child MC stares at her or other people, she doesn't know that it's usually rude and she honestly thinks it's just child MC's way of admiring those they deem worthy of esteem and their way of dressing would remind Uriel of the concept of purity, which she would approve of. Uriel might seem harsh sometimes as she would try to push child MC to speak more often, since she wouldn't know how to interpret all their actions, however if she notices that child MC risks withdrawing even more, then Uriel would swallow her pride and make an effort, taking advantage of her years of experience with Nathaniel to communicate better. It would also be quite funny to see Uriel believe that child MC's teddy bear is a strange unpractical soft shield at first and give them a wooden toy sword after, because it's unsafe to go unarmed

[localcanadiancreature62]

Woe,GF fanchildren be upon ye.

Fiddlestan au but Fidds has children from both Stan and Ford. Lemme explain. Fidds ends up creating a robot child out of his and Ford's dna after losing the custody battle with Emma may and Tate,since it devastated him that much which is why instead of going insane with the memory gun he ends up grabbing hair from Ford while he's asleep and creates a robot clone child from their shared dna. He's already starting to use the memory gun at this point as this is after he quit the project and thus he's beginning to become unstable although he's still sane enough to take care of a child so he figured that he should just replace Tate if his ex-wife won't let him have his Tater. Thus,F-1N53AS aka Finneas "Finn" Mcgucket was "born". Meanwhile the Fiddlestan kid was "born" after Fidds ended up helping Stan with the portal and he suddenly decided to make a kid for them too when they got into a relationship n' the con was talking about wanting to have children lately. And so,F-R4NCH3SKA aka Francheska "Fran" Mcgucket-Pines was born. More under the cut cuz the info for this au is Longgg.

Finn acts a lot like Ford,being bright and passionate as well as in love with life. Finn is basically Ford but if he was untouched by the Horrors (Bill,portal,brother issues, etc). He is a very lively and enthusiastic boy,he's also into the sciences/research like Ford but instead of anomalies he studies regular plants and animals as he also has Fidds' anxiety (he's terrified of anomalies and monsters),he wants to be an Ecologist when he grows up as he loves how the animals plants and people work together to create such a wonderful,thriving environment. Finn may be a lot like his genetic templates,but he's also drastically different from them as he's shy quiet to the point of being nonverbal most of the time and also really jumpy as well as anxious 24/7.

Ford and Fidds may be generally introverted,but Finn is withdrawn to the extreme,he doesn't talk to anyone but his dad Fidds as he's otherwise pretty silent,so silent that his father usually doesn't hear him or notice his presence. Meanwhile Fran acts exactly like Stan but worse. She's a little shit bully that always blatantly insults adults and children alike, she's brilliant like her dad Fidds but also a delinquent like her papa Stan which often leads to her using her smarts for pranking people rather than for useful things like world changing inventions,she is feisty spunky and always confident but she's also lowkey feral. feral as in she's batshit insane and always uses her inventions to hurt people such as using her makeshift taser on the unfortunate children that annoy her or making a hyperrealistic spider robot army to scare her teachers. she ended up getting Fidds' pettiness,she commits crimes but at a smaller scale than her papa Stan. she isn't really into the criminal thing except for wanting to get into arms dealing one day,and Fran's specialty is weaponry rather than machinery. she often creates makeshift BB guns death rays and flamethrowers for fun. Also this is called the Mommy Mcgucket au (because Finn thought that since Fidds "gave birth" to him by creating him,he must be his mother after the hillbilly explained the birds and the bees to him when he saw a billboard of a pregnant woman in town. Fidds tried many times to correct him,but the kid's code is faulty and he wouldn't listen so he just let him call him "Mom". out of universe reason though,i thought it would be funny if Fidds a man was called Mommy loll and the term rhymes with his surname too sooo). Fidds ends up getting married to Stan after the grifter falsified documents of him as a woman and they pretended that "Stanford Filbrick Pines" was married to "Fidelity Mcgucket" since gay marriage wasn't legal yet,so even when it's under a fake name and identity,they're still technically married (Fidds was perfectly fine with everyone thinking he was married to Ford,as he knew that he married the con and not the insufferable bastard). Being with Stan was the happiest Fidds has ever been,he was married to a wonderful man and had two amazing children. He had finally achieved stability after that whole fiasco with Ford and the memory gun as well as Emma may,he was finally happy after so much suffering. Or was he? 😏.

While Fidds may have been a great husband,he was.. lacking as a father. Finn had various defects as a result of him being a quick snap decision made by Fidds' in order to save his sanity soon after the portal testing and him losing the custody battle with Tate,thus he wasn't given the careful planning and blueprints that a regular robot would have which meant that he malfunctions often and he has various disabilities (creating a child out of your and your ex's dna to cope with shit obviously ended up horribly). He's literally blind in one eye,his right leg gets stiff a lot due to the scrap metal used for it being very old and rusty,fingers from both hands fall off a lot as the screws were also rusty and didn't fit his model,he is Very sensitive to touch and both cold/hot temperatures as his sensors are fried from overuse (testing. too much testing) which is why he flinches at the slightest poke or warmth,and he gets tired very easily and thus he needs a constant battery change (physical disabilities,autism,and chronic fatigue syndrome allegories..). Due to how much attention Finn needs with his fragile condition,Fidds ends up spending more time with him instead of Fran. This leads to Fran acting out and being more chaotic than she usually is just to get her dad's attention. Plus Fidds thinks that Finn is Ford,as in he views his own son as an idealized version of Ford that is perfect and has never betrayed him ever nor will ever have the capability of doing so (he may have gotten over his feelings for Ford. But he never got over how Ford betrayed his trust as a friend,as a partner with him making it clear that the portal and the darn triangle are more important to him than the one person who has supported him since day 1). Whenever the boy acts negatively,he is verbally abused and given the silent treatment because "My Ford wouldn't do that",Fidds is entirely deluded by the fact that since his son acts like Ford he could shape him into the idealized version he has of his best friend/first love who would never betray him and always be nice to him. Finn is simultaneously degraded while also being praised for being a better man than Ford ever was,and Fidds outright discourages him from having any dreams or ambitions as he figured that if he got rid of the root cause of "Ford's" betrayal of him i.e his lofty ego and ambitions then he could live peacefully with his new genius.

Except the worst part is,Finn never wanted any of that whole "achieving a great destiny" thing that his other genetic template/daddy Ford sought after,he just wants to live a normal life while pursuing his passions and leaving a mark on the world instead of being an overachiever. Fidds never knew about this,or more like he did know but he ignored his son's explanation in favor of his idealized view on things. Fidds is actively encouraging the glass (disabled) child and normal child/golden child and neglected child dynamic with his insane view on things. He may not be insane from the memory gun as he quit soon after getting into a relationship with Stan,but he's insane from his trauma with Ford. Finn and Fran become distant from one another because of Fran secretly being jealous of her older brother (older cuz he was born a year before her) being their dad's special little boy while Finn thinks that Fran is useless cannon fodder just like Fidds does despite being close with her as kids as the hillbilly figured that the "lazy delinquent" was less important than his little Finny (also the fact that Finn is technically a replacement of Tate as well makes this worse. he constantly coddles and spoils Finn the way he was never able to do so with Tate due to the whole "leave your family to study cryptids in the woods" thing),congrats Fidds,you became an even worse version of Filbrick.

Also the other horrific part about this is that,BOTH Finn and Fran are brilliant like their father Fidds except Fran doesn't use her genius properly due to her being a little shit who favors making killer weaponry instead of helping people and making money with normal gadgetry while Finn is a total nerd that wants to study most of normal non anomaly flora and fauna (he loves animals plants and bugs. he's a real hippie-esque nature boy) in order to help the environment and deal with things like climate change when he's older. Also it's so painful that Fidds' new family was made through choice instead of it being forced on him (i hc that Emma may and Fidds were an arranged marriage by their parents) yet he destroyed it with his obsessive behavior,he chose happiness and didn't let others dictate his life this time yet he also chose to ruin it for himself. Fidds is a loving father,he cares about both of his kids deeply yet he also fucked up a lot.

Him fucking up his kids so bad is the reason why after college,Finn and Fran stay in Gravity Falls but they don't contact their father ever again. They only ever talk to their papa Stan and arrange hangouts with him because he was the only parent out of their two dads that actually felt like a parent and did his job of raising them instead of whatever insanity Fidds subjected them to,Stan often tried to stick up for Finn and make Fidds stop being so strict on him but he stopped trying after he concluded that his hillbilly husband is insanely stubborn while he also tried his best to support Fran and take care of her when Fidds failed in doing so. Stan realizing that Fidds is basically doing the same thing that Filbrick did to him and Ford to their own children made him become distant from the hillbilly as well,but he didn't once try to divorce him. He stayed throughout everything,as he knew that the southerner was doing this because he was hurting although he didn't know how to help when the man was so deluded by him thinking he was doing the right thing.

Everything else basically goes exactly the same as canon,except Fidds never went insane from the memory gun (although he still went insane but for a different reason) Stan has two robot children that often visit him stopping by at the Shack a lot plus the twins have a robot aunt and uncle as well as a third hillbilly Grunkle. Also Finn and Fran have to deal with Weirdmaggedon as well,but it's worse for them as they end up discovering that the man that their father destroyed their family over also ended up making a deal with a demon that caused the apocalypse. Fidds has a lot of explaining to do,and apologies are long overdue (woah that rhymed).

Bonus - The kids technically still "grow up" but via Fidds making new models every year and then transferring their code within the new bodies,thus they still technically go through puberty. Finn and Fran used to act like exact copies of kid Ford and Stan respectively the moment they were created as a 5 and 4 y/o since their code was made to replicate the Stans on purpose but after two years,they started to gain sentence and thus develop their own personalities. Finn and Fran are NOT twins,they were "born" a year apart from each other,they only have matching names because Fidds wanted to make it clear that they were his children (F letter names like him). The Mcgucket Siblings still look human despite being entirely machine,this is because they have silicone "skin" that feels and acts exactly like normal human skin with it being soft being able to get punctured etc and their hair is made out of fine wires that are made to look and feel like normal human hair. Finn and Fran are only as brilliant as they are because Fidds programmed his 30 years worth of studying the sciences into a 5 y/o and 4 y/o in order to make it clear that they're his children. Finn is the only one that calls Fidds "Mom" as Fran calls him "Dad",and he stops calling him that by the time he starts getting verbally abusive and switches to calling him "Fiddleford" although he returns to calling him "Mom" by the time they reconcile,by the time Finn is older at about 12-16 he actually recognizes the man as his father and not his mother but the nickname sticks. Finn and Fran are actually half siblings,as they have the same father but a different other parent. Stan is technically Finn's uncle,but growing up with him and being raised by the con instead of his own father throughout the years made him see the grifter as a father figure,Stan is proud to have him as a nephew since he greatly reminds him of Ford when he was younger but unlike Fidds he doesn't twist it into something messed up.

[thephantomthiefneito]

My Neito Monoma Headcanons..

His body is literally covered in beautify marks. he has one on his cheek, they're all over his back, there's a few on his chest and neck, he has some on his arms, legs and even between his fingers. Literally everywhere

Absolutely insane social anxiety. Especially online. But he powers through it like the sigma he is, putting on a brave face for the world. He thinks he's beat his anxiety because he just ignores it but he still feels a pool of dread and terror in his stomach whenever he unlocks his phone

Neito loves anime. He's not afraid to admit it and he shames those who hate on the media. He especially watches cheesy romance ones but he enjoys Haikyu and Mob Psycho 100. He started JJK but dropped it because he hated it

His fashion sense consists of a lot of vests and cardigans. He wears button ups with sleeves that go just a little over his arms but he usually rolls them up. But he also wears more dramatic clothing. Ouji fashion is something he's inspired by a lot. Either he wears something very comfortable or something very.. not comfortable and there's no in between. sweatshirt or complex layered suit..

He used to wear braces but had them removed before he went to UA. He hated them. He absolutely hated them and was so embarrassed but everyone told him they made him look cute so now he has mixed feelings on them. Talking about it would totally make him freak out though. It's like a little secret he likes to hide

He doesn't know what his music taste is. He listens to both VKEI, Vocaloid and also enjoys classical music. He wants to label himself as an enjoyer of One specific genre but there's so many that he listens to

his playlist

(I don't listen to vkei, my friend helped me with this. I chose the songs but I don't know a thing about vkei)

He really loves Malice Mizer trust me and his favorite vocaloid is Rin

He's on the aromantic spectrum. He doesn't know WHERE he lies on there and he doesn't even realize he's there

He's never been to a waterpark. He barely knows how to swim and is terrified of water because of it. you will NOT catch him at a pool

Neito's real into writing. It's a need since he goes on never ending dramatic ass monologues. You have to have some interest in literature with the way he talks

He loves cats. He has three back at his house and didn't bring them to the dorms only because Mr. Kan told him he couldn't. But he's a huge cat person. More than you'd think. He talks about his cats like they're equal to him (because they are.) When he refers to his cats, he always makes his words so ominous. They're great powerful beings that are deserving of a royal castle. He's the phantom thief that serves their every desire. Talk shit about his cats and he'll hate you for the rest of your life

He's terrified of dogs. He actually freaks out when he sees one. He was bit on the ear by a dog when he was younger. He was just chillin and then BAM! big ass chomp. Now he doesn't fw dogs. Big dogs, small dogs, it doesn't matter if they're cute. He'll be absolutely petrified. Especially when they bark. and JUMP. Oh my god he'll scream and run away

Neito has sibling banter with the rest of his class. All.The.Time.

He talks very high of himself but he talks even higher about his class. He puts them on a higher pedestal than himself (which is really high since he's incredibly insecure.) Class A compliments a classmate, he'll compliment his classmates even HIGHER

This is canon but I'm amplifying it. Very sarcastic. And he says everything with his big, crazy smile, wide eyed. He even smiles widely when he's typing a sarcastic remark. He might even say it out loud AS he types.

He loves tea. one of his favorite drinks. Especially sweet tea. He LOVES sweets. Cakes, candies, ice cream. All sweets

He has no spice tolerance… but he eats spicy foods anyways and pretends like it's no problem for him. His eyes will be streaming tears and he's like "Nooo reaction.." like the tiktok spice kings. He also eats it A LOT. So you'd think he'd build up his tolerance but it just never happens. And his signature wide grin remains. He's crying, trembling, steam rushing out of his mouth as he turns to kendo "This is a breeze. I'm just fine! This is perfect!" and he like passes out a second later, face first into his plate of unfinished buldak ramen. Hopeless

Neito finds dad jokes absolutely hilarious and laughs big and loud at them. He's just a silly guy

Terrible at dancing. So terrible. One time he twisted his ankle while doing a move that doesn't even involve his feet. To make it worse, Mina was watching as he did it and she couldn't help but laugh but he had no visible embarrassment at all. He was just like "YOU WON'T TAKE THE SPOTLIGHT FOR LONG, CLASS 1-A!" or some bullshit.

He loves tomato sandwiches…. They're so good he loves them BELIEVE ME. He actually just loves sandwiches and tomato's and he thinks combining it was the best achievement the human race has ever made

Bipolar disorder. Sorry I don't make the rules. As someone who suffers from bipolar disorder, he has it trust me. Rapid cycling bipolar. His classmates were absolutely freaked out when he went into a depressive episode for the first time after they moved into the dorms and he had to explain to them he's just like that

Autism.

He wears girls perfume. He's not afraid to embrace femininity at all. He thinks perfume just smells way better than cologne too

He knows how to play the piano and violin. He's better at the violin because he's played it for years but he's just a beginner on the piano

Perfect nail care. He doesn't paint colors on his nails but he gives himself manicures and is great at it too. But if you ask him to paint your nails, he'll be the messiest at it ever. He can't paint others nails for the life of him

Favorite fruit and way to eat it is strawberries in sugar. He doesn't like strawberries on their own because sometimes they're a bit tart and the overwhelming tartness makes him BUG OUT

In middle school he really wanted to dye his hair a crazy color but his mom never let him

Absolutely a middle child. Kinda adds into his whole want for attention (it's not JUST because of class 1-A)

Perfect skin routine. He takes hours in the bathroom before bed and in the morning. When he gets a pimple, he's literally attached to Rin's leg, crying, sobbing about how his life is over

He hates soda and prefers juice but still drinks Ramune

Can't cook eggs right no matter what. He's great in the kitchen but whenever it comes to eggs, it's like the whole world is working against him

In an alternate universe, he's a pro hero that kills giant alien flies and his hero name is fly swatter and he has support weapons that are large fly swatters with an electric current and he has support wigs that are also giant fly swatters. In universe he doesn't have a quirk but still managed to become a pro. He's ranked the lowest

ugly doodle

ALL THE ART HERE IS MADE BY ME!! PLEASE DON'T STEAL!!!

I've seen a few rp blogs share their headcanons so I thought I'd do the same because I love them so much

i wanted to make him such a loser i hope it worked