#when they find out they're like:
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the master (wherever they are) getting randomly turned to dust and then brought back: what did that fucker do this time
#dw spoilers#doctor who#the master#thoschei#when they find out they're like:#you killed the entire universe?! WITHOUT ME?!?!?!!#lmao#my post#empire of death
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free will is drawing ur two favorite characters together and making them gay
#akekita content in this economy? it's more likely than you think#this is like for the three ppl that ship them (me tumblr user haliai and atlus)#also which boyliker at atlus designed yusuke's phantom outfit like WHY is he dressed like a gay hooker 💀💀💀💀#the skintight spandex bodysuit designed to show off the slutty waist?? the exposed cleavage?? the cunty little fox tail?? bro 😭#my hand was shaking while i was drawing the second img it felt so IMMODEST 😭😭😭😭😭#i wish atlus confirmed which highschool akechi went to bc i love the hc that he attends kosei#his tie matches hifumi's ribbon so i think they're trying to tell us smt (im delusional)#ANYWAY akechi and yusuke would match each other's freak lowkey like they're both hardcore yappers that weird everyone else tf out#akechi would find solidarity in the fact that yusuke doesn't shut up abt whatever he's interested in#also also the fact that akechi is a mirror version of him bc they're victims of the same situation#both being exploited and utilized as tools after their mothers death#by the man they called father in exchange for validation or a false sense of place#but ultimately yusuke was saved by phantom thieves while akechi refused any pity and slowly succumbed to fate of his own making#really makes you look at atlus and think whats going on in their buttery smooth brains for not including other character interactions#aside from the social links with joker. the wasted dynamic potential between some of the characters is insane 😭#persona 5#p5#yusuke kitagawa#kitagawa yusuke#goro akechi#akechi goro#akekita#bro me when i stay up until three am drawing persona instead of finishing my lab (i’m beyond cooked 💀💀)#i think i need to switch college majors i can’t keep doing this#lotus draws
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given cass's canonical love of reality tv, I am absolutely certain that every year babs has to go into cbs's recruitment email and delete her survivor audition video
#cass watching people pass out from malnutrition and heat stroke while doing endurance challenges: skill issue#she'd way less good at the social side of things in that a lot of people would hate her for being an asshole#but also she'd always know when they're lying to her and also be 30x smarter than they've underestimated her to be#also I think she'd be good at finding immunity idols#honestly I think people would want her in their alliances for her inability to lose at challenges in the first half of the game#and then be utterly blindsided by how sneaky and clever she is in the back half#and she'd literally always have immunity so like#cassandra cain#this deserves to be in the tag I'm RIGHT#if you saw that I said the cw in the first version of this post no I didn't
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there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)
i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.
i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.
and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.
HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.
now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.
my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.
i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.
by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!
keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"
similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."
the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"
if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.
the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.
godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.
the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.
#this is objectively bad advice#don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this#but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries#.... it IS fun#i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him.#bc i used to get SO fucking upset#i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it#and now i just LITERALLY do not engage#instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation#i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection#they like the rush they get from arguing#but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me#so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru#NORMAL CONVERSATION#he doesn't get it yet#i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?''#'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''
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child menace vs. well of patience
de-age quirk scenarios are always so funny bc little kacchan's such a brat lol
#i think they're like 17 and 7 here btw not that it matters#katsuki finds out deku finally got a quirk and immediately wants to 1v1#dekus like uhh that would kill u kacchan#“try n kill me i fuckin dare u.”#also accidental matching bracelets#it's the same one#izuku found it and took it from katsuki's room one day when he was like yeah have it whatever#lil kacchan sees it and is like ....wait a second...#anyways#my art#digital art#mha#digital illustration#bnha#sketch dump#sketch#bkdk#dkbk
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"HA HA HA HA HA! I'M LITERATELY AIMING MY FINGERS!!!"
"This kid is going places..."
#tes#morrowind#nerevarine#tes oc#oc: sundros#oc: viceeraud#ft the ppl in Arrille's Tradehouse#tesblr#my none primary skills are so weak i can't switch weapon type and expect to deliver a good attack#low skills low agility low luck low fatigue lead to low hit rate#can't believe i swing my huge weapon at a big guy and i miss like twenty times#how can i miss him he's right there!!! i'm definitely standing in his personal bubble!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#so anyway if i can't beat the system. why not join them#sunny shows up in taverns with a big sword and boasting like some overconfident child#these big strong warriors are very kind to amuse her. only to find out she ain't bluffing and they're losing money#and then everything changed when her level up her skill#long blade increased to 6 -> aaaaaaaargh!!!!
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Got a new idea cooking in my head.
Another DPxDC idea.
A reborn into DCverse Toddler!Danny but also Dad!Dick and Talons.
Danny is reborn into the DCverse (either he's a clone of Dick, a created test tube baby, OR a kid Dick unknowingly had during his amnesia year) and wakes up in the Court of Owls who finally have their Gray Son and will turn him into the greatest Talon ever.
Thing is, Danny still has his ghost powers (King Danny? Idk leaving it open, either that or just able to control clean ectoplasm) and knows whatever fruitloops have him, this will not be fun. So, when none of the Owls are watching him, he uses his abilities to influence a few Talons and they all book it out of the place.
Danny later finds himself walking the dirty Gotham streets with a few Talons, one holding his hand while the others hide in the shadows in case they need to protect the baby Talon they all care for.
Of course, the sighting of a Talon holding a toddler's hand catches the camera's and Oracles attention very very fast.
One of the Batboys is sent out, not Dick he's on a space mission right now, and whoever it is, is shocked to see a toddler that has a LOT of similarities to Dick.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#Dick is a reborn Danny's dad in this AU#He wont know until he returns from space though#also Batman isn't in Gotham right now either#hence why one of the Batboys was sent out#Danny leaves the court of Owls like that one peace out meme#with a bunch of Talons in tow#they're his now#he is the prophesied Gray Son#cause he can influence the Talons#BUT he doesn't wanna be under the thumbs of fruitloops#he also isn't gonna leave those poor liminals either#Do I have the image of tiny toddler Danny holding the hands of a Talon while other Talons watch from the shadows as a Bat finds them. YES#Do I also want Dick and Bruce to return to Gotham and find tiny Danny playing with an army of Talons in mansion. Also yes#Dick decides to no longer take Space mission btw#THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN WHEN HES OUT IN SPACE. NO MORE!#also he has to come to terms hes a dad now#and keep the Court of Owls AWAY from his son#toddler!danny
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sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go
#the locked tomb#harrowhark nonagesimus#john gaius#harrow the ninth#this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL#this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships#(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think#the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real#but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed)#there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone?#yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't)#the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god#when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care#(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution)#and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on#it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there#while john is -- well he sure is being john huh#this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end#(with john slam dunked right into hell that is)#it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up#john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too
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do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.
His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.
His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.
Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.
Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.
Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.
But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.
But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.
He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.
And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.
And the truth is worse than all of the lies.
How horrifying.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#danny fenton is a clone#clone danny fenton#clone danny#thinking about the inherent trauma that comes with growing up as a clone and not knowing and questioning everything about yourself#thinking about the amount of effort and lying that Jack and Maddie would've had to to do if they wanted to pass Danny off as their bio son#the MEDICAL RECORDS#danny's medical history is completely different from theirs. any generational health problems the waynes have would/could be passed down to#danny and he's completely oblivious to it up until the reveal. he'd have no idea about any medical risks until they hit him before that.#so many little things and inconsistencies that would just build and build and build until it finally came to a head and the truth came out#forever and ever and ever fascinated by the underlying horror of being a clone. there's a horror in being cloned but there's also a horror#in BEING a clone. like yes he could've always known from the start and that comes with its own set of issues BUT. just. him not knowing#for the longest time. the lies and deceit and betrayal. you know how adopted kids come out and talk about how they didn't know they were#adopted for the longest time and how traumatizing and betrayed they felt when they're finally told 15-20 years down the line? yeah that#i imagine finding out you're a clone is a lot like that.#i read a book in middle school once abt a girl moving to a new town with her family and getting these horrible nightmares and noticing how#everyone was acting strange around her. one of her nightmares was about the 30yo police officer being a shambling corpse talking to her#and at the end of the book she finds out she's actually the clone of a dead older sister and the police officer was her sister's boyfriend.#and she was in gymnastics but quit and her parents were so disappointed bc the og sister was a champion/award winning gymnastics player#and i never did finish the book but god am i reminded of that.#i love reading the dpxdc clone danny posts and they usually have him brush off being a clone which is literally totally fine but duUUDE#just imagine his own horror over it. its SOOO good
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4 MINUTES (2024) I 1.01 "I'm sorry. My dad wants me to go home now. For dinner."
#4 minutes#4 minutes the series#userfaiza#userrlaura#uservix#fuaiz thanawat#tonkla#thai bl#bl series#he's so pretty and yet so sad#loved the choice to focus on his reaction to korn leaving him high and dry#he looked like he wanted to cry#i have million of theories for their dynamic#firstly im still conviced that tonkla is gonna be with jjay's character win#i don't know if they're together already on the side or not#i think that they're not together yet and still have to meet#secondly the whole love scene between tonkla and korn HAS to be a set up to draw a parallel between win and korn#meaning: how will win treat tonkla is such a.... “situation” in comparison to korn#korn is very sweet with tonkla but keeps him at a distance#for example when he left him hanging here in this scene#also i noticed that korn didn't even help him undress#EVERYTHING has a meaning RIGHT!!!!???#another theory is that tonkla is some sort of secret agent that has to get close to korn to find out some info or something#anyways.... THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK#mywork
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saiki k cat tank episode is so funny. imagine you get kidnapped by an evil scientist who brainwashes you to hate your powerful psychic friend (so that you'll attack him). and then the friend in question shows up to rescue you and there's a big dramatic showdown where the scientist tries to kill him with a tank. he ultimately fails but then your friend decides he didn't deserve the win (???) and makes a huge personal sacrifice, complete with a heartfelt goodbye to you. but actually the scientist lied about the stakes (?????) so the whole thing was pointless (so he tried to kill him with a tank for no reason????????). and then it turns out they were brothers the whole time. insane
#literally this is the first and only interaction toritsuka has with kuusuke and he doesnt find out they're brothers until the end#honestly his reaction when he found out wasnt nearly dramatic enough because like. what the fuck lmao#saiki k#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo no psi nan#biggie tumbles
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twin sirius & regulus, and remus & lily & james all work in the same store or shop or wherever, and they're all crushing on this one customer, but they're kinda confused bc he flirts with all three of them, but sometimes he only flirts with remus and calls james mate, or he flirts with lily and james and just nods his head at remus, and they're not entirely sure what's going on
#one day lily flirts with sirius and he's like. listen i'm flattered but i'm gay lol and lily is like then why do you flirt with me???#when they find out that they're actually two people they sort of expect there to be a third twin and are kinda disappointed when there isn't#esp lily and james since remus is already far gone for sirius and vice versa#anyway#remus lupin#sirius black#regulus black#lily evans#james potter#marauders#wolfstar#jegulily
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the haters are trying to get me to care about canon. they're trying to get me to only fuck with canon. newsflash you stupid bitch if you are in a fandom space you are consuming fanon. i don't CARE that it's canon that bruce wayne has hit his kids in canon. i make my own world where it's common fucking sense that heroes are good people who would not be abusers. "human flaw" this my ass that motherfucker drives a Batmobile and wears a Batsuit and throws around Batarangs. live in a suspended belief and have fun before you dry up and die a sad raisin of a being
#while i'm at it i am so fucking tired of power scaling#“ok these two characters in a fight” how about anything else for fucking once#these 2 characters but they both have to talk to each other while waiting for the train because they accidentally initiated conversation#these 2 characters but they find out they're cousins and are like “how tf did that happen”#these 2 characters but one of them just watched the other trip and fall at Walmart#like yeah sometimes it's annoying when fanon spaces completely misinterpret a character#but sometimes fanon is just more fun or makes MORE SENSE than a canon choice#and i would prefer reading or seeing that#guess what my guy the world is not black and white it has so many colors#open and use the eyeballs in your skull#unless you're like actually blind#then i guess feel every emotion all at once and that would describe a color#erinwantstowrite#dc#batman#robin#canon vs fanon
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teen wolf meme: [2/4] families -> the hales
Killing doesn't run in a family. Maybe it does in mine.
#teen wolf#derek hale#talia hale#peter hale#cora hale#malia tate#twedit#twgifs#mine#my gifs#twmeme#we should have gotten more malia and derek antics i truly believe that#i know tyler left the show but like one or two scenes of them together after malia finds out they're cousins is all i'm asking#also making the colouring of this almost the exact opposite of the argent one feels very right to me#they're insane in suuuch a different way to the argents but still insane nontheless#they're su's teen wolf family hysteria which tracks given or cooper/blossom affiliation when it comes to riverdale#now they don't make me feel as insane as the argents do personally but that's a me thing i KNOW most people prefer the hales a lot#and i do still really enjoy them there's just not enough fanaticism to make me start biting
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crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.
i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.
in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.
i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.
i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.
plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.
the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.
we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.
i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.
a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.
today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.
loved beyond thinking.
#spilled ink#writeblr#personal#please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it#i really try not to write so specifically about it#bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child#i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years#i might delete this. feels big.#the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum#and if u say ur autistic#inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms#please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do#and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort.#but it still feels like...#when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing.#they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly?#and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find#the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go)#and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW."#''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.''#and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic#someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.
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i'm no film or visual arts expert but ☝️ one little detail i like in dead poets society is how often there are shots of todd looking up at neil. often in admiration, i'd assume--
--which is of course mirrored in the shot of neil looking up at todd after he does his poem;
also,
looking up towards the sky after The Incident. what does this say? i don't know actually. but it feels like something. don't know what
not to mention when neil is finally on stage. everyone in the audience is looking up at him in that case, but i'd say it still makes sense?
they hjust admire each other so much i think. Ouuhg
#im reaching in this whole thing but it's about the principle of it. the framing. the positioning. the art of it all#<- probably here too but i also appreciate when they're at the same eye level... like when neil sits next to todd when he's inviting him to#the first dead poets meeting. like saying you will be an equal in this group#does that make sense?$?#see: i constantly think i am misinterpreting and also finding creative choices where there aren't actually any#'what if the curtains were just blue' made me intentionally go the opposite route in my media consumption just to piss everyone off#Anyway. did i cook or should i stay out of the kitchen#dead poets society#dps#dead poets fandom#my only credential? i took photography in high school
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