#when she starts spotting what appears to be an adult version of her walking around town

[detritusanddross]

okay hear me out. robin tunney as the maddy ferguson of yj

are y’all seeing the vision???

[gracev0609]

I Was Born to Love You - Jake's Version Pt. 2

A gracev0609 / @losfacedevil collaboration

The long awaited second chapter of Jake and Sevda's story.

Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI, Adult Themes, Explicit Sex, Childbirth

The second her eyes opened Sevda felt her stomach flip, nausea quickly setting in. Ripping herself away from Jake's sleepy grasp she rushes to the bathroom, making it to the toilet before the contents of her stomach can make an appearance. Too preoccupied to hear him come in, she jumps when his warm hand makes contact with her cool clammy skin.

“You're okay, my love,” he rubs soothing circles on her back as she takes deep breaths, willing her stomach to settle. Even though he knows this is all a part of pregnancy he can't help but feel a little guilty.

She lifts her head to look at his face, her eyes a little watery from the ordeal,” This is the part I wish I didn't have to do again. My morning sickness is so much worse this time around.”

She watches his shoulders slump slightly,” I'm sorry Sevvie…”

She swipes the wetness from her eyes before standing up and flushing,”You don't have to be sorry Jacob. I knew what I was signing up for.”

Jake pushes the big t-shirt of his she was wearing up over her little bump and places a kiss to her skin,” You've gotta stop making mommy feel so sick, okay? Otherwise we might have some beef.”

Sevda laughs loudly, the shrill sound echoing off the tiles,” Jake you're not having beef with our unborn child, oh my god!”

She looks down at him still on his knees, with a wide goofy smile on his face, she runs her hand through his hair,” You're ridiculous, I swear.”

He stands and wraps her in an embrace,” I love you… I can't wait until we find out what we're having. Ah, I was thinking, if we have a boy, we could name him Les Paul. Like first name Les, middle name Paul.”

Sev blinks a few times fully processing what just came out of his mouth. “Jake…. I'm not… I'm not naming our son after a guitar.”

Jake places his lips to her forehead,” Babe I'm totally fucking with you!”

She blows out a breath, shaking her head.

He giggles, breaking their embrace, “I'm gonna go get some coffee started and get Jade ready.”

She watches as he turns walking away, shirtless with his sweats hung low on his hips. Swallowing hard she wills those thoughts out of her head.

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Jades excitement outweighed her little body’s demand for sleep as she pushed herself out of her twin sized bed and slowly toddled down the hall towards her parents room. Pushing their bedroom door open slowly she found them both still sound asleep in their bed. A soft huff escaped Jade as she crawled into bed between them and snuggled up, pressing her cheek against Jakes back as Sevda stirred and wrapped her little girl in her arm.

“Mama, we meet Halina today, right?” Jade cooed, her little voice giving away just how tired she still was. Sevda nodded gently and pressed a soft kiss against the back of Jades head.

“Yes, we meet the baby today. But we need to get our sleep right now. Daddy won’t be happy if we wake him.” She giggled, reaching up to run her fingers gently through Jades hair.

“Sleep now, Halina later?” Jade mumbled, slowly succumbing to sleep once more.

“Yes, baby.” Sev cooed, pressing a soft kiss to the back of Jades head.

🩷🩷

Jake was in the limbo between sleep and the realm of consciousness as he reached up and stretched his arms above his head. It was then that he felt the warm, small hand resting against his bare chest and the cool spot underneath her smushed cheek; a little puddle of her spit quickly drying in the warm air of the room. Jake brought his arm down and wrapped it around Jade’s little body, pressing her closer to his side and reveling in the sleepy cuddles.

“It’s time to get up, baby girl.” Jake mumbled, gently dancing his fingers along her side, trying to tickle her awake. Jade stirred slightly and nuzzled her face deeper into the dip where his arm meets his shoulder. A tired chuckle slipped past Jakes lips as Jade flexed and curled her fingers, searching for the fabric of the shirt he wasn’t wearing to cling onto. Reaching up she tangled her little fingers in his hair that fell across her forehead.

“Shhh.” She mumbled, twirling and rubbing his hair between her fingers to self soothe back to sleep. A soft sigh slipped past Jakes lips as he shifted and wrapped her little body up in both of his arms, snuggling her.

“We gotta get ready. We’re meeting Halina today, remember?” Jake cooed, pulling his head back to see her sleepy face which was half shielded by his hair. A smile spread across her face and her eyes sprung open at the mention of meeting the baby.

“Can I wear my pretty dress to meet her?” Jade asked, excitement slowly lacing her voice as she wiggled out of his arms and pushed herself into a seated position.

“I don’t know, babe. Why don’t you go ask Mama while I get dressed and then I’ll do your hair, sound like a deal?” Jake asked, reaching up to rub the sleep out of his eyes. Jade's eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically.

“Piggy braids?!” She asked, quickly scrambling off the bed and took off in the direction of her room.

Jake couldn’t help but chuckle at her excitement and reached up, stretching out his stiff back and used the momentum from his arms to pull him to into a seated position. He wasted no time in getting up and made his way to the bathroom, quickly running through his morning routine and threw on a pair of comfy sweat pants and a threadbare T-shirt. The sound of Jades little feet slapping against the hardwood floor alerted Jake to her presence as she popped up in the doorframe of the bathroom.

“Daddy, look!” She squealed, waiting for him to finish drying his face and turn his attention to her before spinning around and watching her skirt twirl. She beamed up at him as she munched on the poptart she held gingerly in her hand.

“Mama caved I see.” He chucked, holding his hands out to her. She nodded eagerly and twirled once more before stepping forward so he could pick her up and place her on the edge of the sink, letting her cross her little legs in the bowl of the sink.

“Now do you want regular piggy braids or Elsa piggy braids?” He asked, holding his hand against her forehead as he sprayed her hair generously with water. Bringing her hand up to her face she tapped the tip of her index finger against her chin as she thought about it.

“Elsa piggy braids!” She declared, tipping her head so Jake could brush all of her hair towards the back of her head. A soft smile spread across Jakes face as he slowly began to pull the brush through her tangled brunette locks. She watched him in the mirror as he placed the handle of the brush between his teeth and used his pinky finger to part her hair as evenly as he could.

“Daddy?” Her little voice chirped, waiting patiently for him to remove the brush and answer her.

“Yes baby?” He looked up and caught her eye in the mirror, watching as a soft smile spread across her face, and she looked down to her princess dress.

“Do you think Halina is gonna like my Else dress?” Jade asked, spreading out the skirt over her little legs. Jake nodded softly and began to braid the right side of her hair.

“I think Halina is going to love your dress. Maybe we can even get her a matching one next time we go over to visit.” Jades eyes grew wide and an excited squeal slipped past her lips. Jake tied off her first braid and quickly braided the other side of her hair, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the crown of her head before lifting her off of the sinks edge and setting her back down on the floor. She took off at a run, going to find Sevda and finish getting ready.

🩷🩷

“Lucy, we’re home!” Sevda called as they pushed their way through the front door of Josh and Y/N’s house. Jake couldn’t help the chuckle that slipped past his lips as his twins head popped around the door jam and he smiled warmly at them.

“Lucy ran to the store for some more wipes, so you’re stuck with Ricardo and thing one and thing two for now.” Josh chuckled, making his way out into the living room. Kneeling down he checked on Halina - who was fast asleep in her swing - making sure she was still in a safe position.

“Uncle Josh, guess what!” Jade giggled, making her way past Sevdas legs. Josh turned his attention to Jade and let his jaw drop slightly, feigning shock as he reached up and placed a hand to his chest.

“You didn’t tell me we were in the presence of royalty! And who have we here?” He asked, holding a hand out for Jades little one. She giggled at his antics and twirled in place, watching as her dress danced on the breeze.

“Nooo, it’s just me, Jade! Do you like my pretty Elsa dress?! Mama brought one for Halina too!” She giggled, turning at the waist and reached up to yank the shopping bag out of her mothers hand. Josh couldn’t help but chuckle as he accepted the bag Jade held out to him and opened it gingerly, taking out the Elsa themed onesie complete with a frilly tutu.

“We can match, Uncle Josh!” She giggled, turning to perch herself on his knee and wrapped her little arms around his neck, nuzzling her face against his cheek. Josh wrapped a sturdy arm around her waist and pushed himself to stand, holding the little girl firmly against his hip.

“And you have the pretty braids to match! You went all out to meet your cousin didn’t you, Gem?” Josh chuckled, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to her cheek.

“Cousin?” Sam’s voice could be heard from down and the hall and Jakes eyes widened. This was not the time or the place for this kind of introduction. Josh turned on his heel and bounced in place, making sure Jade was secure on his hip.

“Yeah, Jake and the family came to meet Halina now that she’s a little bigger and Jade can’t break her.” Josh chuckled, watching as Sam made his way into the living room. A confused expression kissed Sam’s features as he took in the scene in front of him, both of his brothers, Jakes girlfriend and a little girl he didn’t recognize.

“And who’s this little princess?” Sam asked, closing the distance between the four of you. Jade sunk down a little bit, hiding her face in the crook of Josh’s neck.

“Daddy, who is that?” Jade mumbled, clearly unsure of the man that now stood before her. Jake let his head fall, the laces of his shoes now more interesting than anything else in the room. Cleaning his throat he looked up and took in the hurt expression on Sam’s face.

“Well, baby, remember how I told you Uncle Josh wasn’t your only Uncle? That’s Uncle Sammy… he’s daddy’s younger brother.” Pain and anger bloomed across Sam’s face as what Jake had just said sunk in, and he crossed his arms over his chest.

“How about we go get a snack, how’s that sound?” Josh mumbled to the little girl and turned on his heel, hightailing it out of the room with Sevda in tow.

Jake took a deep breath and his gaze found Sam’s as he braced himself for whatever was about to come his way. Sam sucked the sides of his cheeks in between this teeth and nibbled down on them as he waited for Jake to say something - anything.

“I’m sorry, Sam… I really am.” Jake mumbled, reaching up to scrub a hand down his face. Sam scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing Jake up and down as he waited for him to continue.

“That’s… that’s all I get? That’s a I’m good enough for? ‘I’m sorry, Sam.’ There’s a whole ass little baby who calls you daddy and I wasn’t good enough to be informed of that bit of your life? She may not be yours but she calls you DAD JAKE! That should have been enough to loop me in with everyone else. Is… is that Gem? IS THAT WHO JOSH SPENDS DAYS WITH?! And I don’t get to know her? To spend time with her? I’m not important enough to meet your… daughter?”

Jake deflated as Sam’s voice pounded against his eardrums, loud enough to get his point across but soft enough that the babies wouldn’t hear. Sam’s face fell as he realized Jake had nothing to add. He straightened out his back and took a step towards Jake.

“So tell me why, then. Huh? Why was I not important enough to know about Jade? How long has she been a part of your life? Calling you dad? How long have you been hiding a daughter from me?” Jake swallowed hard and took a step back, unsure of what his younger brother was capable of.

“Three years… but she’s only recently started calling me dad.” Sam’s eyes grew wide and he stomped his foot like a child that wasn’t getting his way - anything to not put his hands on Jake.

“THREE YEARS?! She’s been with you three fucking years? You let Josh have full reign in her life and I’m not even allowed to know she exists?! I come here to meet who I think is my only baby niece to be met with another little girl I’ve never seen before. I get that she’s Sevda’s and maybe she was standoffish about your family having a relationship with her but the least you could have done was told me! Send a picture! She’s my niece too.” Jake took a deep breath and steeled himself before tipping his head to find Sam’s gaze.

“She never came up, Sam. There was never a good time to be like oh yeah by the way I have an XYZ year old bonus daughter.” Sam couldn’t help the sigh that slipped past his lips, his broken heart outweighing the logical thoughts in his mind.

“Yknow what? I don’t even care. How’s that sound? I don’t give a shit, she’s more than welcome to be part of this family where I’m not involved than so be it. Keep her away from me.” Sam reached up and placed his hands against Jakes shoulders, giving them a gently shove before he pushed past him.

🩷🩷

Jades attention span on her coloring book was dwindling as the whispered voices of the adults began to put her to sleep. Pushing herself to her feet she slowly made her way over to the break in the door and poked her head around the door jam, watching as her uncle sat on the couch scrolling through his phone. She side stepped her way over to where he sat and reached forward, pressing a little finger into the side of his knee to grasp his attention.

“Hi Uncle Sammy… whatcha doin’?” She asked, pushing up onto the balls of her feet and tried to glance at his phone. Sam watched her cautiously before turning his attention to the kitchen door, looking for the adult that sent her into the living room. Using the hands she now had pressed against his knee, she pushed herself up and climbed onto his lap, leaning forwarding to rest her head gently against his chest.

“I’m watching some videos of the instrument I play. It’s almost like… almost like what your.. daddy plays.” Sam kept his voice soft and fought hard to keep the venom he felt from dripping into his tone, he couldn’t take his anger out on Jade.

“Like the guitar?” Jade asked, and reached up, tangling her fingers in the ends of his hair. He nodded slightly and locked his phone, laying it face down on the couch next to him. Jade pushed herself back into a seated position and tipped backwards slightly, causing Sam to wrap and arm gently around her back.

“Elsa! What happened? You almost fell!” He chuckled, pushing her forward slightly on his knee. She couldn’t help the giggles that slipped past her lips as she began to play with the ends of his hair.

“You did it! Your stinky breath almost knocked me over!” She laughed, the sounds almost like that of a belly laugh as Sam’s face fell and he reached up, pressing his free hand against his chest. A soft gasp escaped her as her eyes landed on his hand and she reached out, pressing her own to the back of his.

“Oh my goodness look!!! Look how big your hand is!!” Her eyes grew wide as he held his hand out to her, palm side up and she placed her tiny one against his, taking in the massive size difference.

Sammy lifted the hand that held hers gently and placed his other hand around it, bringing it to his face he drew in a deep breath and blew gently into the space between his palms, making what sounded like a duck call noise.

“Princess Elsa! What was that?! Do you summon ducks along with ice and snow?!” Jade giggled maniacally and pulled her hand from his, reaching forward she started to pluck at the ends of his hair.

“You have Elsa hair like daddy. But daddy doesn’t let me play with his hair.” She mumbled, pulling locks of his hair this way and that, ultimately turning it into a tangled mess.

“That’s cause your dad is a party pooper.” Sam chuckled, flinching slightly as her sticky fingers tugged on a single strand of his hair. Her eyes grew wide and she stilled as she waited to be scolded for hurting him.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry.” The words rushed out and her and her bottom lip jutted out in a pout as she pulled her hands away from his hair. Sam’s eyes grew wide and he shook his head, not wanting her to have melt down over something so small.

“No it’s okay… look!” He lifted his phone and unlocked the screen, quickly pulling up music video from Frozen. A soft smile spread across Jades face and she leaned forward, pressing the side of her fade against his chest. Reaching up she tangled her fingers in the ends of his hair once more. Sam began to sing along in soft, hushed tones and began to pat her back gently to the beat.

It wasn’t long before she nodded off in his arms, curled up around him with her hand still gently wrapped his in hair. Sam glanced down at her and took in her peaceful little face, mouth hung slightly agape from the way she was resting.

Sevda rounded the corner into the living room, finally realizing that Jade hadn’t come back from the bathroom. Tears sprung to her eyes as she took in the scene in front of her, her little girl wrapped tightly around the uncle she was frightened of just hours before hand and sound asleep.

“So that’s where she’s gotten off to.” Sevda cooed, a soft smile caressing her lips and she made her way slowly into the living room. Sams eyes never left Jades face and he reached up to brush some fly away hairs out of her face, causing her to scrunch her nose in her sleep.

Sevda perched herself on the edge of the couch and reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Sam’s knee. He tore his gaze away from Jades face and an apologetic smile tugged at the corners of his lips.

“I didn’t mean to put her to sleep, I was just trying to combat a meltdown. I’m sorry.” Sevda couldn’t help the giggles that slipped past her lips and gave Sam’s knee a reassuring squeeze.

“You handled it perfectly. It’s past her bedtime anyway, I’m surprised she lasted as long as she did.” A soft chuckle slipped past Sam’s lips as he moved and shifted Jades little body so she lay across his lap, cradling her head in the crook of his elbow.

“She’s so cute. I can’t believe I went from having no nieces to two nieces in one day. No wait, not two nieces… I’m sorry.” Sam’s face dropped as he began to rock her gently in his lap. Sevda pulled a deep breath in through her nose and shook her head lightly.

“She’s your niece too, Sam. No matter how your brother feels about it, she is your niece.” Sevdas eyes welled up with tears watching the way Sam’s face lit up and he lifted Jade up, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

“I do have to get going, do you mind taking her? Or… can I lay her on Josh’s bed? Tuck her in for now?” Sam asked, a nervous tone to his voice. A soft smile spread across Sevdas lips and she nodded, pushing herself to stand she tilted her head in the direction of the girls room.

“She has her own bed in Halinas room, Y/N used to watch her when I was working and you boys were on the road so she’s made herself at home here.” Sevda giggled, pushing open the door to the girls bedroom and threw back the covers on Jades twin size bed.

Sevda watched as Sam leaned down and placed the sleeping little girl in her bed and a soft smile tugged on the corners of his lips as he pulled the covers back over her and placed a soft kiss to her forehead. Sam stood to his full height and stretched out his stiff back before turning to Sevda and nodding in the direction of the door.

Exiting the room quietly, she flipped off the light switch and shut the door with a soft click. Sam had already made his way to the front door and was waving in her direction when she looked up from the door. A soft sigh slipped past her lips as she waved Sam off and slowly made her way back into the kitchen.

“I can’t believe you would hurt him like that. What the hell were you thinking, Jake? Huh?!” Joshs voice was a low growl as he jabbed his finger in Jakes direction. He stood with his shoulder pressed up against Y/N’s back as she slowly wedged her way in between the twins. Sevdas eyes found Y/N’s, a questioning look about her face and Y/N shrugged, still unsure what caused the outburst.

“She never came up, I… I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.” Jake was mumbling, all of the emotions of the day crashing down on him as Josh began to lay into him.

“She’s been in your life for THREE YEARS, Jake. The fuck do you mean she’s ‘never came up’? No wonder they look at me funny when I say I’m spending the day with Gem. They didn’t KNOW HER?! Did you even see the look on his fucking face.” Jake pulled a deep breath in through his nose and held it to the doubt of ten before slowly exhaling.

“There was never a good time to be like oh by the way I have a three/four/five year old.” Jake muttered cowering lower into himself as Joshs voice grew a little louder.

“So you just act like she doesn’t exist? You act like that baby in there doesn’t act like you’re the best thing to walk this Earth? You just so conveniently forget to tell us Sam isn’t aware of Jade? You stole a core memory from us. You took the joy right out of Sam when he was told he had another niece. He’ll never EVER meet Halina for the first time again and you RIPPED that memory from him… FROM US! Sunny may not understand but I do.”

Joshs chest was heaving as his anger rose, spitting every thought in his mind out on a single breath. Sevda shook her head gently as she watched Jake shut down, no longer being receptive to the words being thrown in his direction.

“Why don’t you go get Jade and put her in the car? I’ll meet you there.” Sevda sighed and took a step forward, reaching a reassuring hand out to place against Joshs shoulder. Jake nodded quickly and scurried off to collect his precious cargo.

“I’m so sorry.” Sevda whispered, fighting the tears that threatened to well up in her eyes. Josh shook his head and stepped out from behind Y/N. He reached forward and gently enveloped Sevda in a hug, pulling her tightly against his chest.

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know.” Josh mumbled, letting go of her so she could hug Y/N as well.

“I’m just sorry he ruined your day and stole Halinas thunder. I never would have brought her had I known.” Sevda mumbled.

Her goodbyes were short and to the point, not wanting to make anything any worse. With a wave over her shoulder she slowly made her way out of the house. Jake was just closing up the back door as Sevda slid into the passengers seat.

“You’re an asshole. That’s all I’m saying.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

In recent weeks Sevda's morning sickness had eased up, making each day more bearable again. As her baby grew and she felt like she gained a little more of her independence back, Jake's overprotective nature increased. He felt the need to take over a lot of her usual responsibilities and let her relax. She was growing his baby after all.

Jake worked his way back into their home, he had just taken Jade to school. A job in which he now found himself doing, making sure Sev got as much rest as she needed. He didn't mind, he actually enjoyed himself driving her there while they had a ‘Frozen’ karaoke session. The smile on his face would grow tenfold when he gazed into the rear view mirror seeing her belting along to the soundtrack. He enjoyed the fuzzy feeling in his chest when he walked her into the daycare and she would give him a tight squeeze and an,’ I love you Daddy.’ and the butterflies that he would get in his stomach when her teacher asked how Sevda was doing and how far along she was.

Once home he found her in the kitchen, her pregnant belly wrapped up in a silky robe, making a hot cup of tea. Jake caged her in his arms, placing soft kisses to her neck. He felt Sev shiver in his arms.

She takes a deep breath to steady herself,” If you're gonna keep touching me like that you're going to have to have enough time to fuck me too.”

He chuckles into her bed head,” One little kiss and you're all hot and bothered?”

She gently pushes her back against his chest getting even closer,” I am so wound up right now. I don't think you know how much restraint it took me to let you leave the house looking like that.”

A shit eating grin adorns Jake's face, as he knows he only threw on sweats and a hoodie to take Jade.

“And your hair is back in a bun. Do you know how feral that makes me babe?”

Knowing he only threw his tangled bed head back in a bun to look somewhat presentable makes him smirk,” Feral? Fuck Sev, getting desperate?”

Sevda grips the kitchen counter and pushes her ass into his hips,” Damnit Jake do you have time to fuck me before you have to leave or not?”

Jake glances over his shoulder at the clock on the wall,” Danny's picking me up in a half hour, we can make that work.”

Releasing her from his arms she grabs his hand leading him to the couch. She places her hands on his shoulders and pushes him down into the plush cushions. He grasps at her hips pulling her into his lap,” Gonna have to ride me love, don't want to be too rough with you.”

Sevda unties her robe revealing that she had nothing on underneath. Jake groans, his eyes raking over her body,” God you look so beautiful like this Sevvie.” She pulls him in for a kiss and he lets his hands wander, cupping her plump breasts gently thumbing her nipples.

In between kisses he whispers,” Gonna let me take pictures of you baby? I want to capture just how gorgeous you are carrying my baby. You're absolutely stunning.”

He looked into her eyes, heavy with arousal and she nods her head,” Sure Jakey, you can take pictures.”

Jake leans his head in, placing hot open mouthed kisses on the skin of her chest, his voice deep and gravelly,” I'll grab new film while I'm out.”

She grabs the waistband of his sweatpants and pulls them down to his knees, letting his cock spring free. In her haste she grabs him, running his pillowy head through her slick before sinking down on him.

Jake grunts,” Jesus Sev. Fuck.”

She swivels her hips grinding her clit against the tuft of hair at his base,” I'm so fuckin needy Jake. You look so hot today,” clenching around him,” Did you even realize that you can see a clear outline of your cock in those sweats? Fuck you're such a tease Jakey.”

Jake's eyes clamp closed as he starts to bounce her in his lap. Her hand snakes it's way to rub her clit as she throws her head back. Jake leans forward licking and sucking on her breasts bouncing in his face.

“Yes! Fuck Jake that's it!”

As she comes undone on top of him he hears his phone start to ring in his hoodie pocket, signaling that Danny is outside ready to pick him up. He internally curses Daniel's punctuality.

Suddenly Sev rises off of him, and he whines before realizing what she's doing as she gets down on her knees. She takes him in her mouth, bobbing her head down his length, her hand jerking off what she can't fit. She brings her other hand up, squeezing his balls, and he groans throwing his head back against the couch cushions. It takes everything in him to keep his hips still as she drives him over the edge, exploding into her mouth. Once she milks him for all that he has to offer her she rests back on her heels, opening her mouth and showing him his load. Maintaining eye contact she swallows him, smiling sweetly,” You didn't have time to clean up a mess babe.”

He tucks himself back into his sweats,” I fuckin love you.”

Jake rises to his feet, holding his hands out for her to help her up.

“I love you too Jakey, now you should run along before Danny calls you again.”

He quickly embraces her, giving her a gentle kiss on the lips, before grabbing his wallet and house keys off of the counter. He makes his way out the front door, over to Danny waiting in the car.

Danny furrows his brow as Jake climbs into the passenger seat of his Jeep,” Dude, you're wearing sweats? You never wear sweats.”

Jake smirks, grabbing the seatbelt over his shoulder,” Yeah man, had an action packed morning. Took the munchkin to daycare and all.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

A soft sigh escapes Jake as he trudged up the front steps of his place and turned to wave at Danny before unlocking the door and stepping inside. It was later than usual and Jade was already in bed, most of the house lights turned off save for the soft glow of the television in the living room. Jake dropped his bag next to the door and kicked off his slip ons, slowly dragging his feet as he made his way into the living room.

Sevda was curled up on the couch, her kindle long since discarded on the coffee table in front of her and she had her head resting against the back of the couch, fighting to keep her eyes open. Jake couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face as he made his way over to her and laid across the couch, pressing his face gently against her stomach.

“Long day, baby?” She mumbled, reaching down to thread her fingers gently into the hair at the crown of his head. Jake nodded against her and reached up, rubbing the side of his hand along his eye.

“So long, have I ever mentioned how much I can’t stand my brothers sometimes?” Jake mumbled, letting his eyes flutter shut as he reveled in the feeling of her fingers against his scalp. Sevda closed her eyes and let her body fully relax, any worries of the day melting away as the feeling of Jake's weight on her. He reached up and began to trace soft designs against the exposed sliver of skin on her side, sending a shiver down her spine.

It was then that he felt the flutter and something pressed softly and quickly against his cheek. Jakes eyes flew open and he pushed himself up, his eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly agape as he stared up at Sevda. She couldn’t help the giggles that were spilling past her lips as her eyes connected with his.

“Was that what I think it was?” Jake asked, a tone of awe laced in his tone. Sevda nodded gently and reached around to place her hand on her stomach, poking gently in hope of getting the baby to kick again.

“I felt them kick for the first time this morning. They've been doing somersaults in there for two weeks. It's about time they start making their presence known! I wanted the first time you felt them kick to be a surprise too but uh… baby has decided your face was the best place to kick.”

Jake couldn’t help the overwhelmed giggles that slipped past his lips as he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Sevdas stomach. He kept his eyes trained on her as his mind reeled with so many thoughts. He continued to press soft kisses to her stomach, showering her in love and affection.

“Oh sure, you’re not gonna do it again, huh? Baby, that was daddy’s cheek, you know! We don’t kick people in the cheeks.” Jake giggled, fighting the tears that welled in his eyes as the thought of his baby kicking him settled in to his mind.

🩷🩷

Jades eyes grew wide as she watched Sevda massage her stomach with the special stretch mark lotion Jake had gotten her. She watched as Sevda carefully lifted her stomach, massaging underneath as a sigh left her lips and her hand jumped to her ribcage.

“What’s the matter mama?” Jade asked, pushing herself to stand in the spot she had been sitting on the floor before slowly making her way over to where Sevda stood. Reaching up she pressed her hands against her moms slick skin, pressing softly against her stomach.

“The baby’s kicking me, sweetheart. Sometimes it hurts where her little foot digs in.” Jades mouth dropped open and she pressed a little harder against Sevdas stomach, hoping to prompt a little foot to collide with her hand.

“She can kick you in there?!” Jade asked, her eyes full of wonder as she found Sevdas gaze. With a soft nod of her head, Sev reached down and cupped Jades chin in her hand, squishing her little cheeks together. Jade snaked her tongue out between her pursed lips and scrunched up her nose - something she did when Sevda was getting on her nerves.

“She moves just like you or I do, just in a more enclosed space…ope! Just like that, baby, did you feel that?” Jade pulled her hand back and a soft yelp escaped her chest. Pulling her chin out of her mothers hand she looked down at her hand and back to Sevdas stomach.

“Emma Mae! That was sissy’s hand you know!” She giggled, tapping her hand gently against Sevdas stomach. Sevda couldn’t help but giggle as she bent at the waist as best she could and placed a soft kiss to Jades forehead.

“Who’s Emma Mae, baby?” Sevda asked, fixing the little girls fly aways as she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to her moms belly.

“My sister, duh! The baby mama!” Jade giggled, pressing her cheek against Sevdas stomach.

“We don’t even know if the baby is a brother or a sister yet, sweetheart. But if they do end up being a sister we can talk to daddy about naming her Emma Mae, okay? I like that name.” Sevda smiled down at Jade, not wanting to discourage the little girls creativity and thoughtfulness of naming her little sibling.

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevdas eyes held a look of wonder as she eyed the cake that sat on the picnic table in their backyard. Y/N had been in charge of all things gender reveal after having attended the scan with Sevda in Jakes place. Jake had been bummed to have missed a scan appointment but knew she had been in good hands.

“So.. are you excited?!” Y/N squealed as she wrapped her arms gently around Sevdas shoulders. Sevda nodded gently and pulled out of Y/N’s embrace, turning to face her.

“I cannot wait to know, I’ve been dying to find a crib set and coming home outfit for this little bean.” She giggled, resting her hands gently against her bump. Y/N reached out and placed her hand in between Sevdas, hoping the baby would make their presence known. A squeal from Jade made them turn their heads watching as Uncle Sammy lifted her high, interrupting her dance.

She smiled at Sevda,” We picked some good ones, huh?”

Sevda returned a smile full of warmth,” The best ones.”

Sev pulls her fingers closer to the sudden jab of movement from the baby inside and Y/N murmurs,” These little babies are going to be so spoiled.”

Nodding her head Sevda agrees and she lifts her gaze to the rest of the faces in the backyard, the space littered with friends and family. Her eyes began getting misty at the thought of her and Jake's babies spending precious time with his brothers or his parents. Interrupting her thoughts, Jake and Josh come over joining you both.

“Are you ready to find out what we're having love?” Jake asks, resting his chin on her shoulder as his hands caress her bump.

Josh interjects,” Can you believe she wouldn't tell me? She thinks I can't keep it a secret! That's ridiculous!”

Sevda chuckles,” Josh, the only thing that's ridiculous is that you think you wouldn't tell Jake!”

Y/N grasps Sevs hand, giving it a light squeeze,” So… Are you ready?”

Sevda looks to Jake, a beaming smile on her face,” Yeah we're ready!”

Sevda watches as her face lights up, before turning on her heel, hurrying inside to gather the supplies for the gender reveal. Meanwhile, she grasps Jake's hand and heads over to the table set up for them to find out the gender of their baby. Y/N makes her way back into the backyard, carrying a cloud shaped balloon and instructs everyone to gather around. She sits the weight down on the center of the table in between them and instructs to pull on the strings when it's time to reveal what color confetti is inside.

Once the chatter and excitement from their loved ones dies down, and a few people have their phones out recording the happy memory Jake and Sevda are finally ready to know, excitement is churning in their stomachs.

The guests chant as Sev and Jake grab on to the pull strings,” Three! Two! One!”

Excitedly they yank on the strings, and their cloud balloon rains down covering the table in hot pink confetti. Gasps and cheers erupt from their families. Jake has the biggest smile Sevda has ever seen plastered on his face, but it quickly fades as he takes in her watery eyes and trembling bottom lip.

“Wha- what's wrong Sevvie?”

She turns away from the crowd of guests and she sniffles. Her pregnancy hormones wreaking havoc,” It's stupid.”

Jake cups her flushed red face in his hands,” Baby it's not stupid, what's wrong honey?”

“I… I wanted a boy, so he could look just like you!” She steps forward pressing her face into his chest as a sob wracks her body.

Jake stifles a chuckle, “ Sweetheart. Trust me, our baby is going to look just like me regardless of its gender.”

“But h-he c-could have looked exactly like you!”

He rubs his hands up and down the length of her back,” She will look just like me. I think you're forgetting that Kiszkas are basically copy machines.”

A laugh-sob slips from her lips as she remembers that his siblings look so incredibly alike, and that Halina is Josh's mini-me. “ Fuck… you're right.”

She lifts her head, and he smiles at her as he swipes his thumbs against her under eyes, cleaning up the mascara that ran. Sevda's mom comes up, making sure her daughter was okay. “Yeah mom…. Baby brain and pregnancy hormones are one hell of a combination.”

Jade drags Sam by the hand, eager to see her mom. Sevda smiles, squatting down to be eye level with her little girl,” Guess what baby? Mommy and Daddy are having a girl! You're getting a little sister!”

Jade cheers dancing around in the circle of aunts and uncles that have gathered, her mouth running a mile a minute rattling off all the fun she's going to have with a little sister.

“Are you alright Sev? That was some reaction!” Josh asks gingerly.

“Oh! I'm fine, it was dumb! I am actually really happy to find out that we're having a girl. I was upset because I kept picturing a little boy who looked just like Jake, but he then reminded me that she will still look like him.”

Sam giggled,” Ya know, you evened out the ratio. Boys used to outnumber the girls growing up!” Sam nudges Danny in the side with his elbow,” Looks like Daniel will have to have a boy soon to even out the scale.”

Danny chuffs,” Fuck no! I'm not having a kid for a long time, I'm very happy being Uncle Danny thank you.”

Sam pouts dramatically,” Well someone's gotta do it! It's not going to be me, I'm still not even sure if I'm totally committed to Madeline!”

Danny rolls his eyes walking away from the conversation, but of course Sam follows, continuing to jokingly badger him,” Oh come on Daniel! A little boy with your dark curls? That's cute as fuck!”

Once the group disperses Jake pulls Sevda into his side,” You sure you're alright? I didn't want to see you cry today.”

His thumb gliding across the soft exposed skin on her back sends a shiver down her spine,” Really I'm okay. It was a dumb lapse of judgment, deep down I knew I was going to be thrilled with either. And I am! Jade's going to have the best childhood with Halina and her baby sister to play with, she managed to get some built in best friends. Honestly, I have no idea what I'd do with a boy, all I've ever known is little girl stuff.”

Jake leans down, kissing the top of her head,” I'm glad… I'm so happy it's a girl, Sev. I'm getting pretty good at taking care of Jade, after all she says I do the best Elsa braids,” Jake chuckles into her hair,” What can I say, I was made to be a girl dad.”

“You're the best girl dad babe.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda could hear Jake rustling around in the bedroom as she places the final curl in her hair. As her waves cooled and set into place she raised her little handheld mirror to her face inspecting her makeup, she swiped a stray flake of mascara off of her cheek before smiling at herself. Setting the mirror down she took in herself in the larger vanity mirror, placing her hand on her bump over her robe, she smiled contently at what she saw in the mirror. Untying the gown she turned to the side, inspecting the size of her bump, her hands gliding over the soft skin.

“My beautiful girl, Daddy's going to take some pictures of us. I'm sure he's going to make us look amazing. Your Dad has many talents babygirl, photography is one of them.”

Sev smiles to herself as she feels her daughter shifting in her stomach.

Jake stands in the doorway, one of his film cameras looped around his neck,” I'm all ready when you are Sevvie.”

She turns to face him, and she can't help smirking when he visibly swallows as his eyes flick from her exposed chest to her face.

“You look stunning, sweetheart. I can't wait to capture you on film.”

“I'm excited too Jake, you have such an eye for photography I can't wait to see what you do.”

Jake steps out of the doorway, motioning for her to follow him. Her jaw drops when she enters the bedroom, utterly amazed at what he's done to set the vision he has in his head. There's string lights on every dresser top and soft warm lit lamps, creating a delicious golden yellow glow. The bedding has been changed completely from dark blue to white. At the foot of the bed rests fluffy white blankets, and a gauzy sheer material.

“Jake… the room is gorgeous!”

“I wanted to capture you the way I see you, glowing. Ethereal.”

Jake removes the camera from his neck, setting it down on the dresser before grabbing a bottle of her favorite lotion,” Can I put this on you baby? I think it'll really make your skin glow in the light.”

Sev nods her head before shrugging off her robe, letting it slip from her shoulders pooling at her feet. Jake pumps some lotion into the palm of his hand before rubbing them together to warm it. He places a gentle kiss to the back of her neck before placing his palms on her shoulders. His hands glide down her back, rubbing the lotion in. Sevda sighs into his touch, the feeling of his warm palms on her skin making arousal pool between her thighs. She attempts to shake off how turned on his touch makes her, but it's no use.

He grabs another palmful and lathers down her arms, the moisturizer making her skin gleam in the low light.

Working his way around her body, his warm palms rub over the skin of her stomach. He places soft kisses to her floral scented skin. Her daughter decides to stretch her feet, poking out above Sevs belly button.

“Jake!” She whispers out.

He already sees his daughter saying hello, he places his lips to the spot she was nudging,” Hi baby. I love you. Daddy loves you so much.”

Sevda's eyes well with tears when Jake meets her gaze with a large smile on his face.

“Fuck, don't make me cry right now. I'm going to ruin my makeup before you even take a picture.”

Jake stands before getting one final pump of lotion,” Ah, I forgot a spot.”

He grins as he places his warm hands on her breasts, her nipples poking his palms. He's careful with her tender flesh as he rubs the lotion all over her chest.

“Perfect love, you're glowing already. Go lay in the center of the bed, I'm going to wash my hands quick before I touch the equipment.”

Once finished washing the oily lotion off of his hands he dons his camera once again. Jake holds it up, looking through the viewfinder, and his breath catches in his throat. Sevda is sitting crosslegged in the center of the bed, her hands caressing her bump, as she smiles down at her active daughter. Her hair looks soft and tousled, her skin reflecting the light. Jake gulps, trying to keep his composure,“Sev… I'm not sure if you've ever looked more beautiful than you do right now. You're absolutely gorgeous, glowing with my baby in your belly.”

Her eyes flick to the camera and Jake clicks the shutter button again.

“Lean back for me love, rest on your elbows with your back arched. Yes! Okay, now cross one leg over the other. Perfect Sev, fuckin stunning.”

He captures her again, before grabbing the sheer gauzy material, draping it over her body. Jake grabs her palm and places her manicured hand over her bump on top of the fabric. Adjusting his shot so he just gets her stomach in frame. He asks for one more pose with the material covering her body. Instructing her to kneel on the bed with her hands cupping her bump, he takes one more picture.

Jake comes up and removes the fabric from her body, causing goosebumps to form over her skin.

Jake whispers into her ear as he clutches the sheers to his body,”Doing okay baby?”

She leans back against the pillows, her legs falling open on their own accord.

“Mmhmm. I just… I can't help imagining you fucking me in here with all the lights.”

Jake chuckles as he feels his skin get hot,” It wasn't supposed to be that kind of photoshoot baby. Just wanted to make you look extra pretty.”

“Come on Jakey, take some pictures with me. You think I haven't noticed the semi you've been sporting since picking up the camera?”

Jake blushes, he can't help the way his body reacts to her. He sighs,” Okay… it's not like anyone but us is seeing these anyway.”

Sev grins, her legs opening wider and she slips her hand between them,” Exactly, we might as well have some fun.”

Jake undresses, his camera swaying against his chest as he removes his pants and gives himself a few tugs.

Hushed he asks, almost breathless,” Can I take a picture of you doing that. Pleasing yourself?”

She nods and he feels his blood rushing to his groin as he gets her hand in frame.

Her voice is low and full of sex as she swirls her fingers around her clit,” You don't have to ask to take pictures baby. I trust you, take whatever you think looks sexy.”

Jake kneels on the bed, crawling between her thighs. Bending down he kisses her belly, trailing up to her breasts. Softly, careful not to hurt her, he sucks her nipple into his hot mouth.

“Fuck Jake, give me the camera baby.”

He takes it off his neck and gives it to her, quickly giving her a brief rundown on how to work the machine.

She gently pushes on his shoulder,” Lean up again for me baby, hold your cock in your hand. Fuck, you look so pretty.”

He pumps himself a few times, keeping himself on edge and he stares down the lense. She swallows thickly as she brings the camera away from her face, studying him in the soft glow. The yellow light illuminating in his disheveled fly away hair makes him look sinfully delicious, his eyes look shadowy and full of lust. Her gaze glides down his torso, admiring the hair that forms beneath his belly button and trails down to his thick heavy member in his hand.

“Jake, you're gorgeous.”

Wiggling her hips to signal to him what she wants he presses his hips forward slightly, and glides his head through her soaked folds.

“Sev you're so wet, god you're soaked. My pretty messy baby.”

She hands him the camera, wordlessly letting him know she wants him to capture this moment.

He hits the shutter button, capturing his point of view.

“G-get some of you sinking in to me.”

He clenches his jaw as he does what she asks, each time the shutter button clicks she clenches around his length. He can feel the heat radiating off of her skin, she's so wound up.

“I think I should put the camera down for a bit.”

She visibly pouts, jutting out her bottom lip.

“At least until my pretty girl cums.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda jolted awake, something in her dreams startling her. She turned over to face Jake's side of the bed, looking to cuddle with him when she found that he was awake. His face illuminated by his screen as he scrolled on his phone. Jake turned his head to look her way,” You okay baby? Really jumped awake there.”

Sevda rubbed her growing bump and sighed,” Yeah, I'm alright. What are you doing awake anyway?”

“Well, first the thunder woke me and I went to go check to see if it woke Jade, but it didn't. Then I couldn't really fall back asleep so I started looking up baby names,” Jake scooted closer to Sev,” Wanna see my list?”

A warm smile appears on her face as she snuggles into his side,” Let's see what you've got.”

She watches Jake switch tabs on his phone from the baby name article to his notes app.

“Okay, first on the list is - and this isn't in order of what I like the most, it's just how I came across them. Okay, first is Nora.”

“That's pretty.”

Jake smiles at his love,”Yeah? I thought so too.”

“Okay, next is Serena.”

“Eh, I'm vetoing that one, a girl from highschool who was mean to me was named Serena.”

She chuckled as Jake backspaced Serena off of his list.

“Okay… what about Lilly?”

“That's pretty too, although I'm not sure about flower names.”

Jake typed in a question mark next to Lilly,” Okay, last name on my list is Maude.”

Sev scrunched her nose and shook her head no.“I have a suggestion. Actually, Jade came up with it. Emma Mae. I think it's really cute.”

Jake furrowed his brow, really mulling it over,” Emma. Emma Kiszka…. Emma Mae Kiszka, you better listen to your mother right now! That's a good one, I like that. It's my favorite actually, you like it?”

Sev reaches her arm across his stomach, snuggling closer,” It's my favorite too…. So. She has a name?”

Jake cranes his neck down kissing the top of her head,”She has a name.”

“Jade's going to be so ecstatic that we picked the name she came up with.”

They were just starting to drift back to sleep when a house shaking crack of thunder boomed. Jake sat up, sliding out from under Sevda,” I know that one woke her up. Fuck that was so loud.”

Jake came back into the bedroom with a shaken little girl tucked into his neck. He placed her in the center of their king sized mattress and laid down opposite of his love.

Sevda pet Jade's bed head, soothing her little girl,” You're safe here honey. I know it was so scary and loud.”

Jake places his palm on her little back,” Hey Jade, you wanna know something cool? Momma and I were talking about the name you picked out for your little sister, and we really like it. Her name's going to be Emma.”

“Emma Mae!”

“Yes sweetheart, Emma Mae.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

The weather had finally broken and it was finally nice enough to get outside again, which meant it was the perfect day to carry out Jake's plan. Josh had come by to pick Jade up early in the morning, her change of clothes packed away in her little backpack. Josh and Y/N were instrumental in making sure the day goes off without a hitch. Tucked away in her little pack was a shirt Jake had gotten customized, as Jade was a big part of the day as well.

A few weeks earlier, while Sev was out with her mom shopping for the baby, Jake had Josh and Sam come over. As Jade was coloring in an activity book at the kitchen table Jake called for her attention,” Hey sweet pea? Can you help Daddy? When Uncle Josh and Uncle Sam get here, can you ask Uncle Sam something for me? He's still kind of mad at me, but you're his favorite 5 year old niece.”

Jade was scribbling away, concentrating on her picture.

“Honey, did you hear me?”

Jade huffs, clearly annoyed that Jake was taking away from her art. She turns to face Jake,” Yes Daddy, you want me to ask Uncle Sam because he's mad at you.”

Jake smiles,” Can you ask Uncle Sam to help with Mommy's surprise?”

She nods agreeing as the doorbell rings and she hops down from the chair, running towards the door yelling for her uncles.

A few weeks later, Jake helped a very pregnant Sevda into the car and started driving her to her favorite cafe. As they sat on the patio of the restaurant, while she sipped on her strawberry green tea and picked at her croissant she sighed,” I know you wanted to have some time to ourselves but I do miss Jade. I mean this is the last bit of time she has until she has to share my attention as well.”

She dabbed the brown napkin on the corner of her eye, capturing the tears before they fall. He watched with a sympathetic gaze as she rubbed her hand over her stomach, the soft fabric of her wrap dress moving slightly.

“I know my love, but we're meeting back up with them as soon as we're done here. Josh even texted me that she has a surprise for you.”

Jake's phone buzzed in his pocket, he pulled it out silently reading the text from Josh.

Josh: We're at the park! All set up by the creek , just the way you wanted.

Josh picture attachment: ½.

Jake smiles at his phone as the pictures come in, first is a picture of Jade striking a pose in the shirt he had ordered, and the second one is a picture of Josh sitting on the picnic blanket with Halina strapped to his chest in a fabric wrap with Y/N and Jade sitting behind him with Sam smiling and waving in the back taking up the rear.

He puts his phone away and looks up at his soulmate. He admires the way she's glowing with his growing baby in her belly. Everyday it amazes him how incredibly beautiful she looks this way, like she was made for this. He notices that she's finished with her pastry so he stands up, grabbing her hand to help her, once she's steady on her feet his hands find her bump and his lips connect with hers in a searing kiss,” Let's go Momma, meet up with your baby.”

Jake pulls his Jeep into the gravel lot next to Josh's, and he smiles as he sees them off in the distance. All four of them are standing on the creek bed getting their toes wet in the stream.

Sev giggles,” He looks like such a dad, it's cute.”

She points to his twin and Jake can't help but agree. Halina is swaddled to his chest, the wrap fully supporting her weight so he can hold her hands free. But of course Josh doesn't, keeping one of his hands on his baby's back at all times. Jake's mind reeled, in such a short span of time, that'll be him. His daughter resting on his chest.

Jake cleared his throat,” He looks good like that. He was meant to be a dad.”

“So are you Jake.”

Jake grasped her hand in his, bringing it to his face so he could place soft kisses on her knuckles. Suddenly, he feels the small box in his pants burning a hole in his pocket,” Shall we?”

They leave the serenity of the vehicle and make their way across the soft lawn to meet them, Jake trailing just a bit behind Sevda. He briefly takes in her image, her blonde hair blowing in the breeze and the skirt of her dress swaying with every step, utterly beautiful.

He sees Jade's eyes light up as she realizes they're working their way towards her,” Mommy!!”

She sprints to get to Sev, a beaming smile on her face. Jake's eyes widen as it doesn't look like she's slowing down to stop,” Hey, hey hey! Cool your jets! Don't run into Mommy, please!”

Thankfully she stops right in front of Sevs belly before gently but eagerly giving her mom a hug.

Sev hugs her tightly,”Hi my baby! Are you having fun with your uncles and Aunt Y/N? Did they get you a new shirt, what does it say?” She holds her at arm's length reading the text, Will you marry me?

She furrows her brow, confused for a moment.

“Sevda.”

She turns to look at Jake and she finds him down on one knee, presenting a beautiful diamond ring.

“Will you marry me baby?”

Her bottom lip trembles as she shakes her head,” Oh my God, yes! Of course I'll marry you Jake.”

He quickly gets up from the ground, slipping the diamond onto her finger before capturing her lips in another searing kiss.

He keeps his face close to hers, intensifying the moment,” I love you so fuckin much. You deserve nothing but the best and I intend on giving that to you Sevda. Our babies deserve it, I'll do everything in my power to shower my family in love for the rest of my life.”

“I love you Jake. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Jake breaks their embrace and scoops Jade into his arms,” Your momma said yes baby! We're getting married, how amazing is that? Mom and Dad are getting married.”

They work their way over to Josh,Y/N, and Sam all of them exhilarated to watch this special moment happen.

“Oh my God you're engaged!” Y/N squeals matching Sevs excitement as she grabs her hand inspecting her beautiful ring.

Josh wraps his arms around his slightly younger brother, congratulating him, Jake smiles and thanks him for helping him carry out the plan .

“Of course Jake! You know I'd do anything to help you.”

After Josh's embrace Jake looks at Sam, staring at each other for a moment before Sam engulfs Jake in a warm embrace.

Jake mutters low just for Sam to hear,” I was hoping you'd come, that's why I made sure Jade asked you.”

Sam's big brown eyes look to the sky for a moment, before returning to Jake's,”I was mad. I was so hurt, it still hurts to think about. But, I wanted to be here, I'm your brother and I don't want to miss out on any big moments in your life. This engagement, your first baby, and whatever lies after… I love you Jake, and I love your family. I want to be here.”

Eventually Sam removes his arms from his older brother, his eyes looking at the twins,” I love both of your families, I love being Uncle Sam.”

After a moment he lightens the mood and yells for Sev,” Come over here! Let me see that big ass rock Jakey boy picked out!”

Sevda dangles her fingers in front of his face, wiggling them so the light catches the diamond.

“Damn girlie, he must love you!”

Sevda looks at Jake, her eyes holding so much love for him,”He does…He really does.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda tossed and turned, her body feeling so achy and uncomfortable. She grit her teeth as her abdomen cramped and Emma kicked her yet again. Looking at Jake's sleeping form she glares, wishing she could sleep peacefully once again. Stiffly she sits herself up in bed, fluffing the pillows behind her before reaching over to grab her phone. It was now 3:27a.m, officially one day past her due date. Sevda had a good feeling that Emma would be arriving soon, she felt like she was making her way into position and her body was beginning to show the telltale signs. She sighed, opening Instagram and began scrolling through pictures from brands and friends. Her eyes began to get bleary and she was about to put her phone down to try to go to sleep again when she felt the smallest internal 'pop'.

“Shit shit shit..” she muttered, struggling to quickly get out of bed, waddling as fast as she could to the bathroom. Once in the bathroom she swiveled her head between the shower and the toilet, before ultimately deciding to sit on the toilet. She sat, removing her soiled pajama pants, and called her mom. After a few rings she picked up,” Hey mom….”

“Is it baby time?!”

Sev laughs as quietly as she can, her mom has been on standby for days. Whispering,” Soon, my water just broke. Jake is still asleep, I'm not sure if I want to wake him yet.”

“He's going to be a wreck!”

“He is!” Letting out a breath of air, as Emma moved around yet again,” Can you come pick Jade up in an hour or so?”

“Absolutely honey, I'll start getting ready now. I love you, and congratulations Sev.”

“Thanks mom, love you too.”

After hanging up the phone and cleaning herself up Jake appears in the doorway, his hair wild and his eyes dark and puffy.

“Are you okay love? I thought I heard you talking.”

Drying her freshly washed hands Sevda replies,” Yeah Jake, I'm alright. Uh, yeah. I was on the phone with my mom… my water broke.”

His eyes widen,”Are you fucking kidding me?! Are you ready to go? Let me go get the hospital bag- Do you feel okay? Uh- I-”

Sevda steps forward, her belly against his, and she weaves her fingers into his hair scratching his scalp trying to soothe him.

“Everything is fine Jake. She's coming soon, but not right now. We still have plenty of time, I promise you that. Hours. I'm going to take a shower, could you lay out my black sweat set? It's hanging in the closet next to the hospital bag. My mom's going to come by in about an hour to pick up Jade.”

His hands shake as he reaches to tuck her hair behind her ear,” I'm so anxious.”

“I know baby… everything will be okay. This isn't my first rodeo,remember?”

He sighs,” I know, but it's my first time. This is it, we've been waiting for this moment for what feels like forever. Trying for so many months, and we've waited 9 months for her to grow so healthy and strong and now…”

Sevda pulls his face to hers, kissing his lips, placing a few more kisses on his mouth before pulling back,”I'm so excited for her to finally make her arrival.”

His hands caress her bump,”I can't wait to hold her.”

Sevda smiles wide,” You're going to look so hot holding our newborn.”

All Jake can do is laugh.

“You want a hot shower baby?”

Sevda hums and nods, so Jake steps away and turns the water on nice and hot for her shower. He helps rid her of the rest of her clothes, placing soft kisses against her shoulders trailing down the valley between her heavy breasts, to kiss her bump one last time.

Sev shudders a breath, heavy with emotion,” I loved us… like this.”

Jake looks up at her, eyes slightly watery,” I did too, maybe one day… we'll do it again.”

Sev reaches down, cupping his cheek in her hand, her thumb softly brushing his cheekbone. Jake stands and sniffs back his tears,”Let me go get your sweats laid out. I'm gonna get ready as well.”

Sevda stepped into the warm spray, letting it help soothe her aching body. She lathers her hands in body wash, freshening her body. Her hands glide softly over her stomach and she grits her teeth as her abdomen contracts.

She holds her hands still over her bump,” I can't wait to meet you sweet girl. You're going to be so loved, your daddy and I are so excited to meet you. You have a big sister and a cousin, and you have an aunt and so many uncles, and they all love you so much.”

She hears Jake come back into the bathroom,” Still doing okay love? I brought your clothes in.”

Reluctantly Sevda turned off the hot water stepping out of the shower and into Jake's arms as he wrapped the towel around her body. He gently dried her body before grabbing her sweatpants, helping her into them. He put her fuzzy socks on her feet before sliding the oversized sweatshirt over her head.

“You look pretty Sev.”

She shook her head in disbelief,” I look pretty?”

“Mmhmm. You're about to have our baby, you look gorgeous.”

Jake cautiously leads Sevda down the steps and to the couch so he can go back upstairs to get the hospital bag and go wake up Jade.A few minutes later he comes back down the steps with a sleepy little girl in his arms as their doorbell rings letting them know that Sevda's mom has arrived.

Jake deposits the little girl onto the couch next to her mom before going to answer the door. Jake opens the front door to reveal Sevda's mom who immediately steps inside giving him a big hug.

“Congratulations honey! Oh, I'm so excited. Are you ready for a newborn?” Her mom asks swaying him in her grasp.

“I hope so.”

She gently rubs her hands down his back, comforting him,” You'll do great Jake, you're such a good dad to Jade already.”

Their hug is interrupted by the sounds of Jade's sleepy footsteps,”Gramma?”

Sevda's mom leans down greeting Jade,” Hi honey bunny. You're gonna hang out with me at my house for a little bit, and when we come back your baby sister will be here. Sound good?”

Jade nods wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“I wanna go talk to Mommy and then we can go alright?”

Jade asks Jake to hold her while her grandmother talks to Sevda, he picks her up softly rubbing circles on her back as she gets comfortable. Every once in a while he presses a kiss to her head, reveling in the last moments it will just be the three of them.

🩷🩷

Jake wasted no time, quickly helping Sevda into the car and sped off in the direction of the hospital. He insisted she sit in a wheel chair so he could make sure she was rolled into triage safely. Once he knew she was in good hands, the triage nurse having wheeled her back to place her into a bed. Jake sent a text to his group chat with his brothers and a separate one to his mom letting them know that the baby was coming.

Time was ticking away slowly, and Jake wasn’t sure what to do with himself. It didn’t take them long to bring Sevda up to the labor and delivery ward, settling her into a private room and let her know the anesthesiologist would be in soon to place her epidural. Jakes phone rang suddenly, startling them out of the almost peaceful silence that had washed over the room.

“Josh… it’s five am.” Jake chuckled, turning his attention to the television that played softly in the background.

“And my niece is about to be born, you better get your ass down to this lobby and bring me up there with you.” Jakes eyes widened at bit at the tone in Joshs voice and he pulled the phone away from his ear.

“Do you mind if Josh comes up?” Jake whispered, not wanting to startle Sevda. She shook her head sleepily and let her eyes flutter shut as Jake pushed himself to his feet and slowly made his way out of the room.

He rode the elevator down to the lobby and, taking a deep breath, braced himself before he slowly made his way to the lobby. A frazzled looking Josh stood in the lobby with his arms crossed over his chest and his sweatpants sitting crooked on his hips.

“What the hell.” He mumbled, walking over to Jake and he threw his arms tightly around his brother. Jake let out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding and reciprocated Josh’s hug, melting into the familiar embrace he was wrapped in. Jake’s mind reeled with a multitude of different thoughts, but the main one being why had Josh shown up.

“You didn’t think I’d let you do it alone, did you?” Josh mumbled, running his hand along the expanse of Jakes back before pulling back from him.

The hours melded together and the anticipation was heavy in his stomach. He paced the room and bounced his knee in his seat as Sevda's contractions came closer and closer together. Josh stood at Sevdas bedside, talking to her as she drifted in and out of consciousness. This was so much different than when Halina was born, he was calm and patiently waiting for his niece's arrival. Now he was excited and so, so nervous. The stark contrast between Y/Ns choice of having a home birth and Sevda's choice of having a hospital birth was sharp. The lights felt bright, and there were wires and machines monitoring his soulmate and his baby girl.

Sevda called for his attention, disrupting his pacing.

”Jakey, can you hold my hand.”

Dutifully he grabs her clammy palm into his own, wiping a bead of sweat off of her forehead with his other.

“You're doing amazing baby, I'm so proud of you.”

Sevda groaned as she felt yet another contraction beginning, this one stronger than the last.

“Jake. I- I think it's time to push, this is so uncomfortable, can you call for my nurse.”

Jake swallows thickly before pressing his lips to hers. He goes to press her call button on the remote as her nurse walks in.

Sevda tells her she believes it's time to push, and her nurse confirms her suspicion.

“Before anything happens… you should sit down, Joshua, I heard all about how you couldn’t hang when Sunny was born.” Sevda chuckled, wincing as the pressure in her pelvic area intensified. Josh rolled his eyes and pulled a chair over to where he stood before wrapping his hand around Sevdas as well.

In a whirlwind of doctors, wires and monitors, cries of discomfort and agony, and some sweat and tears, Jake's baby was placed on Sevda's chest. She sniffled lightly and began placing kisses on the baby’s head that's covered in brown hair.

“Oh! Oh my god, hi. Hi my baby, Hi Emma.”

Jake stares at the scene in front of him in disbelief, his daughter is here, she's healthy and beautiful and perfect. This is what they've been waiting for.

Sevda's watery eyes meet Jake's,” Come here baby, come say hi to your daughter.”

Jake leans down, face level with hers as he takes in her pink skin and smushy features,”Hi Emma, I can't believe you're finally here. Daddy loves you so, so much.”

He reaches his hand out and freezes,” Can- Can I touch her?”

“Of course you can Jake, you're her father.”

His hand gently cups her head, his thumb rubbing back and forth feeling her soft warm skin, instantly falling in love with his baby.

Once everything settles back down and they are moved into a recovery room, Jake holds his tiny baby in his arms. Sevda rests and he studies Emma's features trying to decide if she looks more like him or her mom. He hears his phone buzzing on the bedside table where it's plugged in, he gently lays her down in the bassinet before grabbing it. It was a ‘good luck!’ text from his mom, looking at the time he figures his brothers will be awake in the next few hours. Jake snaps a quick photo of his tiny baby before sending it to everyone, Emma Mae Kiszka has arrived!

Fin.

Tag List 🩷 @lipstickitty @joshsindigostreak @myownparadise96 @stayinginthesun @vanfleeter @lyndz2names @takenbythemadness @sinarainbows

[hippielittlemetalhead]

Inevitable

Slightly updated version of a one-shot found in my Spot-centric anthology thing I have going on AO3. The little one-shots like this will be posted separate from the actual Sparah fic I'm working on as they are technically from different universes. Some notable changes for the sake of plot and story things.

Feel free to leave constructive criticism or to just share in the brainrot of these characters with me.

Hope ya enjoy!

Pidge is a term of endearment of the time period usually used between close friends or sweethearts. Rós is pronounced (ro-ous) or alternatively (ro-ou-sh) Roíse is pronounced (ro-sha)

He figured there wasn't much he could do when she started talking about the boy who sold near the shop she worked at. He figured there wasn't anything he could really say that wouldn't give him away when she asked if he knew the boy with the cowboy hat and red bandana. But he figured he could stretch the truth a little, she knew he wasn't Manhattan, she knew he wasn't supposed to be seen on this side of the Bridge. That he broke the few rules the Newsies could all agree on just to see her. He figured he could get away with a little white lie.

"His name's Jack Kelly. Us newsies calls him Cowboy."

"Do your nicknames really follow you to every borough?"

"Some of us they'se the only names we'se gots. Most of us don't keep the names our parents gives us."

"Is Rós your real name then, or just one you've given yourself?"

"Is real enough I suppose."

"I don't think I like that answer."

"That's life, pidge."

He knows his days are numbered when she shows up to their usual spot with bright eyes and a smile he's never seen before lighting up her face. He knows this is probably the last time he'll be able to see her like this once Jackie and his boys make good on their promise of a strike. He knows it's probably time he told her the truth.

"And he's taller than I expected. I thought he wasn't much older than you, Rós."

"I'se always been kinda short fer me age. And most of us don't keep much track o' age past when we'se can't swing it in a lodge no more."

"How old are you then?"

"Maybe sixteen? I was real little when I wound up at the lodge. Lots o' times it all jus' blurs together."

"Are there no records of you coming to the lodge?"

"I suppose, under a diff'rent name pro'lly. The one Blue gave me afore he aged out fer good."

"And when he aged out, Spot Conlon took over?"

"You'se don't gots to say 'is full name. None of us do."

"I've only heard the boys around here say his full name, and even then they're real quiet like it'll make him appear."

"Well you knows what they says about speakin' o' devil's."

"Oh you're terrible."

"So'se I'se heard."

There's no getting out of it now as he makes his way through Lower Manhattan. There's a roiling in his gut as he walks head held high and cane gripped tight in his fist as some of his boys tail him. There's newsies from every Borough and working kids alike openly watching him and plenty of adults being a little more subtle about it. There's maybe half of the older Manhattan newsies watching from the shadows as he makes his way through the midday crowd like he belongs here. There's not a sign of Cowboy or The Mouth as he settles down next to an already sitting Sarah. She hands him half a light buttery pastry and he bites back the comment that their usual spot on the fire escape in the alley behind them had better shade.

"So, from what Jack says, Spot Conlon has done a world of good for the working kids of Brooklyn. And newsies through the boroughs."

"I suppose so."

"I wouldn't mind formally meeting him. Davey said he reminded him of an avenging angel."

"Your brudda said what?"

"Oh he made some long-winded comparisons between the boy who earned the loyalty of an entire Borough -and then some- and came to the rescue of the Manhattan newsies and the angels in the Bible. Beautiful to look at and fierce to behold. Warriors of God meant to protect Heaven and Man."

"Your brudda thinks Conlon is an angel o' da Lord?"

"With everything people say about him, is it so hard to believe?"

"You Jacobs are crazy."

"Why thank you."

"Sarah, I-"

"I get why you did it. Once Jack and Davey found out about Rós it was rough. Davey had concerns for my virtue. I'm sure you can guess how Jack felt about his girl spending time with another fella."

"Jacky boy never was good at sharing."

"Then the picture came out. Jack was larger than life before but now, now he was practically walking legend. And Davey was right up there with him. Davey, Les, Racetrack, Blink and Boots and- and all those boys, they were all part of somethin bigger now. But you, you were somethin' else, Spot."

"Roíse."

"What?"

"Me name, me real one, not a nickname or somethin' I chose to make a new life, it's Roíse."

"Huh, I think I like that."

"Figures you would, pidge."

"This changes everything doesn't it?"

"A bit. I'se Spot Conlon and you'se Jack Kelly's girl. We've got a Strike ta run and I think there's more than just a factory or tha docks waitin for us when we'se age out now."

"You boys are changing the world."

"We're gonna try at least."

Francis Sullivan. Spot knew most of the newsies had fake surnames or used nicknames instead of their Christian ones but he could see why Cowboy had changed everything about his. He had been the one to break the news to Sarah when she met them outside of the courthouse sans her beau. He was glad to see she had managed to make it out safe and unharmed, glad that both 'hattan and Brooklyn had listened when he barked out the order to get her to safety above all else.

She doesn't cry when he tells her about Francis Sullivan and his real folks and his sentence to the Refuge. She doesn't cry when he tells her the cause that Cowboy had gotten himself what might as well be a life sentence to kids like them for was practically ground to a halt since Denton couldn't -wouldn't- publish another article about their strike. She doesn't cry when he finds her not two days later and tells her that the one person he had thought he could stand losing a girl like her to Legendary Strike Leader, Jack Kelly had shown up in a fancy new suit and a whole stack of crisp newspapers, denouncing the very war he started. She doesn't cry when she reaches out to pull him in close and rest her head on his shoulder while they both catch their breath like they used to on that fire escape down the block from her family's apartment but he takes a small step back, more a shifting of his weight to his back foot really, enough to keep the space between them. She doesn't cry when he takes his hat off and calls her Miss Jacobs, wishing her a good day with a bow like those fancy gents give the fancy ladies they will never be.

He doesn't say anything when he hears word that Jack 'Cowboy' Kelly is back with a plan. He doesn't say anything when he hears that Mouth is sporting a shiner from one of the Delanceys, that he got it defending his sister's honour. He doesn't say anything when he and his boys make sure Denton makes it to Roosevelt without any of Pulitzer's goons getting to him. He doesn't say a word when he sees Jack Kelly standing tall and proud and bigger than life in front of thousands of young kids who had never had a voice before now, a Jacobs on each side. He holds Les close between him and Racetrack so he doesn't get swept away in the crowd.

He doesn't look for her when Jack Kelly rides away in Teddy Roosevelt's fancy carriage. He bites his tongue when the damned fool comes back, sweeping up his girl and kissing her for all the world to see. He shrugs Racetrack off when the other boy asks him if he's okay. He pretends not to see the way the other 'hattan teenagers watch him, daring him to give them a reason. He turns away when he sees her searching for him in the crowd.

They had won the day, now he had a borough to run.

[ohmyeyesmyeyes]

hi, i just wanted to say i loved your charles oneshot :) i was wondering if you could do an enemies to lovers w/ daniel ricciardo? thanks!

DANIEL RICCIARDO ONESHOT

TEMPORARY STRANGERS

( WARNING: swearing, alcohol, blood/injury, little bit of fluff/angst? )

word count: 5.4k

< this is my attempted version lol >

You’d debated whether or not to go to Theo’s party. For one, it was on a Thursday night, which, in itself, was rather tragic for a party thrown for an adult because surely he had to have thought that most people would be working on a Thursday night? Secondly, you had an early shift at the hospital in the morning, so you weren't sure if staying at a party fit for Blair Waldorf for a couple of hours was entirely worth your presence.

But, after a persuasive conversation on the phone — in which Theo spent the majority of it begging you to make an appearance — you’d caved and now you found yourself standing in the middle of a kitchen sipping on a lemonade, expertly avoiding everyone’s eyes and wondering why you agreed to come in the first place.

The apartment was a large, luxurious one, decked from head to toe in pricey decorations and with an open-plan layout. You even had half the mind to compare it to what you imagined a Royal Palace looked like.

In other words, it was big and incredibly tasteful and fancy, in the most annoying way possible.

Then again, Theo did own a successful Estate Agency, which specialized heavily in selling buildings in the centre of London. The money pooled from that spoke for itself, and it also meant that since university he’d met people in all aspects of his work, all of which looked like they’d been invited to his party, which unfortunately meant you didn’t know anyone, and the couple that you did, you had absolutely zero intentions of actually talking to them.

The guests themselves were glamorous, dressed to the nines and decked with expensive watches and jewellery, and you felt out of place wearing your best dress with your favourite high-tops and a blazer.

On another note, the lemonade and food were delicious. It was almost as if he’d hired a private caterer and then shoved them out of the back door before people started arriving.

“You know, I didn’t think you meant it when you said you’d come.” A smooth voice knocked you out of your reverie, and you whirled around, hastily swallowing the lemonade when you noticed the familiar blonde that you’d befriended in uni.

“I didn’t think I did either if that makes a difference.” You replied, biting the inside of your cheek as Theo rolled his eyes, making his way around the kitchen island to place a couple of collected empty glasses near the sink.

“Well, are you having fun?” He asked, leaning back against the counter next to you, his shoulder judging yours teasingly.

You hummed, narrowing your eyes, “Not as much fun as when you crashed my Grandparents party and scared away the boy they tried to set me up with, let’s just leave it at that.” You breathed a laugh, swirling the lemonade in your cup as if it had suddenly become the most interesting thing.

“Oh, I haven’t had that much fun in ages.” He said, his attention turning to the other partygoers in the near vicinity, his eyebrow raising as he spotted someone trying to sneak one of his clocks into their bags without being caught. It didn’t work; they saw his gaze and turned a suspicious shade of red and pretended as if they’d simply been admiring the thing before walking away.

Theo cleared his throat, adjusting his tie.

“I think I’m just gonna…” he trailed off, his finger pointing in the direction of the culprit, an apologetic look in his eyes. You nodded, breathing a short laugh in understanding.

“I think I’m going to head out anyway—”

“Oh, please stay.” He held out a hand, silently begging for you to stay.

You hadn’t seen each other in at least a couple of months because of clashes with schedules, and it was getting to the point where the odd texts and phone calls and video calls were starting to feel more like a chore than a privilege. You had been close friends for the best part of ten years now, and you were still close, but adult life was more difficult than you expected trying to balance relationships and work.

You breathed in deeply, eyes flashing around the guests, accidentally catching the eye of Daniel and flicking your attention back to Theo hastily.

“I’ll stay for now but I’m going home in an hour, I have an early shift in the morning.” You promised, offering a small smile as Theo nodded, returning the gesture before disappearing into the throwing of people.

It wasn’t long before you were approached by an unfamiliar face. She was — like all the other people in the room — dressed nicely, and she stumbled slightly in her heels, almost running into you.

“Oh, shit, sorry about that.” She muttered, and you could smell the faint, bitter scent of alcohol on her breath, indicating that she wasn’t completely sober.

“Oh, it’s no problem.” You reassured, asking if she wanted something else to drink, seeing as though you were standing next to the drinks table and the fridge.

She shook her head, instead resuming Theo’s place against the counter next to you.

“Do you see that man over there?” She whispered, pointing her finger in the direction of the crowd out in the living area.

You furrowed your eyes, trying to lean slightly to make sure you could see who she was pointing at.

“I think you’re gonna have to be more specific because there’s about thirty people in that general direction.” You said, resisting the urge to laugh as the woman sighed, shuffling closer to the group and standing in her heeled tiptoes to see over the sea of heads.

“Okay, so he’s about 6 foot, brunette, curly hair…” she snuck a glance at you out of the corner of her eye to make sure you were trying to look out for the person she was talking about, “really fit and has an Italian nose.” She concluded.

You pursed your lips, suddenly feeling quite awkward in the presence of a stranger. You averted your eyes back to the pile of drinks on the kitchen island and halted your actions in searching for who could only be Daniel Ricciardo.

She noticed your reaction and gasped loudly, her hand flying to her mouth as if you just spilled the hottest gossip of the season.

“You know him.” She stated, stepping back slightly with an accusatory shine in her eyes.

“I don’t know him, I just know of him.” You lied, trying to brush the topic off as subtly as possible.

“Nuh-uh,” she said, taking your arm and ignoring the cry of protest from your lips as she dragged you away from the kitchen area and into the heart of the party, where the chatter was significantly louder, “I don’t believe that. You can introduce us.” She insisted.

You dug your heels into the floor as best as you could, trying to push away the wave of panic that surged through your veins.

“Lady,” you started, ripping your arm out of her iron grip, “I don’t know him.” You reiterated.

“If you don’t know him, how can you know of him?” She enquired snarkily, arching a perfectly plucked eyebrow in your direction.

“How can you not know of him?” You returned, shrugging. Her face remained blank, and it occurred to you she really didn’t know who Daniel was. “That’s Daniel Ricciardo. Formula 1 driver for McLaren this year.” You told her, straightening out your blazer uncomfortably, unaware of the eyes on you from the other side of the room.

“Formula 1? So he’s, like…a millionaire?” She licked her lips,sultry eyes slipping over the crowd and fixating on who you assumed to be Daniel.

You cringed, resisting the urge to turn your nose up at her. You suddenly regretted telling her about his career because even a blind man could see that his money was the main thing on her mind at that moment in time.

You neglected from answering her question, instead trying to slink back to the kitchen, but you were interrupted by the scuffle of feet and the sound of something shattering before an obvious cry of pain was heard throughout the room, nearly drowned out in the volume of the music pumping from the speakers.

You swivelled back around, and several people had stepped away from the scene leaving an open gap in the crowd as more people gathered around to see what the kerfuffle was.

The girl had disappeared seemingly into thin air and you were about to take the moment of peace as an opportunity to leave, but Theo’s voice called your name over the crowd, laced with urgency.

You furrowed your brows in confusion, heart pounding with anxiety at the panic in his voice. You made your way to the crowd, apologising to people as you pushed your way through to get to the centre of all the attention.

As soon as you edged into Theo’s vision, he dragged you by the elbow into the centre, pointing to the person who’s cry of pain was heard over the music.

Blood was dripping from a deep gash in the palm of their hand, and the person in question looked a little pale, holding their hand up above their head, a permanent wince etched onto their face. Despite that, they looked rather uncomfortable with all the attention, and it was this that caused Theo to turn to the crowd and usher them away.

“I have a first aid kit in the bathroom.” Theo informed you, and you wasted no time in helping the injured person raise their arm higher above their head, guiding them through the crowd with a secure arm around their waist.

“A cut on my hand doesn’t hinder my ability to walk, okay?” They tried, shifting out of your grip.

“No, but if you pass out, it hinders my ability to patch you up.” You retorted, hurriedly passing your glass of lemonade back to Theo.

The person let a weak, sarcastic huff pass their lips, but they let you guide them to the bathroom, keeping an eye on the blood dripping down their arm and creeping into the sleeve of their blazer.

“Toilet or tub?” You asked, kicking the door shut behind you and casting a weary glance back at their hand.

“Depends on the context.” They answered.

You rolled your eyes, settling them on the toilet and quickly rifling through the sink cupboards, locating the first aid kit with ease.

“I’m gonna need you to take off your blazer.” You said, never imagining that you’d say those words to Daniel Ricciardo of all people.

Your relationship with Daniel was weird to say the least. You first met at — surprise, surprise — Theo’s party a few years ago. You’d gotten along swimmingly, perhaps a little bit too well, and it was safe to say he was incredibly charming and cursed with good looks. You were quite good friends, actually.

Until one day he pulled a face at you when you approached him at an award’s evening of some sort. You’d got no idea what happened to elicit such a negative reaction, or any idea on what you could have done, but he’d sneered at you and turned around, making conversation with the person next to you. He’d never explained why, but ever since that day he’d ignored you as much as possible, and it wasn’t exactly hard not to enjoy his company when he was so obviously disgusted with your presence.

Maybe it was the fact that you only managed to snag one piece of cake that night.

“You want a striptease? At least take me out for a date, first.” He muttered, pressing his lips together in obvious discomfort as he peeled his blazer off, being cautious of the blood. “I don’t even know why you’re bothering with this anyway, I’m fine.” He insisted.

You perched yourself on the edge of the bath, placing your bag on the tiled flooring and zipping open the first aid kit.

“Dan, you’re dripping blood…you’re clearly not fine.” You muttered, carefully rolling his shirt sleeve up past his elbow, ignoring the fact that this was the first time in a long time you’d been this close to him. Ignoring the fact that he looked positively fine in a suit, minus the blood.

He let out a shuddering breath, closing his eyes and shifting uncomfortably under your touch.

You turned his hand over, assessed the gash and winced, trying to ignore the tingling, uncomfortable sensation mirrored on your own palm as your eyes ran over the gash. It ran the width of his palm, and it didn’t take a genius to notice that it was quite deep in some places.

“Can we please be quick?” He sighed, his other hand smoothing out non-existent creases in his dress trousers.

You hated to admit it, but his words stung.

“Can you at least pretend like you don’t hate me, for fifteen minutes at least?” You said, an unintentional fierceness to your tone, one that you’d tried your best to dial down in his presence, but it seemed to no avail.

“Only if you do the same.” He muttered, and you took the liberty of ignoring his comment, reaching to fish an antiseptic wipe from the first aid kit, gently dabbing at the edges to clean off some blood so you could see the extent of the damage. You flexed his hand, ignoring his hiss of pain as the cut stretched slightly.

“What was that for?” He asked, his free hand slapping your hand as he fought to take his cut up hand out of your grip.

You opened your mouth in surprise, the skin on your own hand stinging slightly with the sudden contact.

“Don’t slap me! I’m trying to make sure you don’t have glass in it, you twat.” You said, shaking your head, “Which it doesn’t, by the way, so you’re welcome for checking.”

“How did you even know to check for glass?”

“Because there was broken glass on the floor?” You answered, applying pressure to the wound and lifting his hand a little higher again.

He huffed, turning his face away from you, so he was facing the wall, his lip curling into a sneer.

You rolled your eyes, “What did you mean when you said ‘only if you do the same’, anyway?” You murmured, keeping one hand on the wound and reaching to the floor to pick up your bag and unclip the front.

He narrowed his eyes, watching you root around in your bag for something, and he was about to say something, before he was interrupted by a knock on the bathroom door.

“Everything ok in there? Everyone still alive?” Theo’s muffled voice echoed into the room.

“We’re fine.”

“Yeah.”

Daniel grimaced, brown eyes burning through the door as if he was trying to send a telepathic message to Theo through the door.

“Good.” Was all Theo said before the full sound of his shoes against the wooden veneers could be heard on the other side of the door.

You hummed in delight, producing the very thing you were originally looking for in your bag.

“Haribo?” Daniel asked, raising his brows expectantly.

“To get your blood sugar levels up, you’re still pale.” You answered, ripping open the packet, and just as you were about to pour the sweets into Daniel’s outstretched hand, you paused, recoiling.

“What?” He asked, noticeably frustrated that he wasn’t scoffing the sweets.

“Why don’t you like me?” You questioned, biting on the inside of your cheek anxiously as he stared straight at you, his face expressionless.

He was quiet for a while, and you almost told him to forget you even said anything because the simple question looked like it hit home, but he opened his mouth, quickly closing it again. He looked at you from behind furrowed brows, apparently confused by your question.

“Why don’t I like you?” He repeated the question. “Why don’t you like me?”

You gaped at him, your cheeks flushing with irritation at his words.

“I don’t—I never—” you sighed in frustration, the hand clutching the packet of Haribo clenching unconsciously as Daniel looked at you with mild concern, “Why the hell would you think I don’t like you?”

He blinked, casting his sights back to the wall, ignoring your eye contact.

“Theo told me you, and I quote, ‘hate me’,” he answered, swallowing roughly as you continued to stare at him.

His discomfort under your gaze brought a sick sense of satisfaction, but at the same time you were having difficulty wrapping your head around what he’d just admitted.

“Theo? My Theo?” You clarified, arching an eyebrow.

He nodded.

“When did he tell you that?” Your heart was starting to hammer in your rib cage, the power of which was almost painful to endure.

“When we went clubbing a while back,” he shrugged.

“Why would he—?” You muttered, before turning back to Daniel. “Are you sure he said that?”

“Positive.”

“So you’ve been so hostile towards me for months now, all because of something someone else said to you in a dark, loud club when you were — let’s face it — probably drunk?”

Daniel sucked in his cheeks, now realising how there would have been so many chances for misunderstanding in such an environment.

“Yes…” he replied, dragging the word out slowly, trying his best to take his mind off the way your grip on his wound was slowly increasing.

“I never said I hate—”

“So…you don’t not like me?” He interrupted, his eyes wide.

“No…Yes…I don’t know how I’m supposed to answer that, but I never hated you.” You said, ducking your head down at his intense glare, instead turning your attention back to his bleeding hand, carefully peeling off the gauze to take a peak. You suddenly remembered the scrunched up packet of Haribo still clutched in your grasp, and you shoved it in Daniel’s direction, not bothering to even look at him when he took it, humming quietly in thanks.

He didn’t know how to respond to that, the revelation sending his mind spinning about a hundred different directions.

He was mad at Theo, even if what happened wasn’t entirely his fault, but he was mostly mad at himself for not even bothering to try to talk to you and hash it out. The months he spent trying to ignore you were completely miserable, and the worst part is, he put you through hell without even giving you any reason, and all of that ignorance was not even worth it…that is, if what you said was true.

“Oh.” Was all he said, taking to watching you strap up his hand after telling him he (thankfully) didn’t need stitches, but he did need to rest it for a while, which was probably for the best because the F1 Summer Break was currently in full swing.

Once you’d put the soaked gauze in the bin and tidied everything away to how you’d arrived before the bloodbath ensued, you stood up, brushing nonexistent dirt off your dress, and offered Daniel a rather confused smile.

He bit his lip in thought, your eyes unconsciously zipping to his mouth, before steering your gaze back up to his eyes when he caught you, raising his eyebrow slightly, a pale shade of pink tinting his cheeks as he fought back a smirk.

You turned away, looking at the door, which was very much tempting you at that moment in time.

He cleared his throat once he’d noticed your attention flicker away from him, and it was only then he registered he practically craved you to be looking at him. Whenever he was at functions with Theo, he would always unknowingly search for you, even when he thought you hated his guts, he’d still scan the crowd of unfamiliar faces in the hopes that he’d see you again.

He chewed on the inside of his cheek nervously, feeling your eyes on him. It was as if he’d suddenly melted into a teenager again right beneath your eyes. He cleared his throat again, sinking back against the toilet in an attempt to make himself smaller at the revelation he’d just arrived at.

It was weird, seeing him so shy when he was naturally such an outgoing character.

You found a part of your brain secretly admiring his flustering, but you quickly shut that down, reminding yourself that you shouldn’t be having those thoughts, especially since you’d just had to mop up a slice on his hand.

“I think I’m gonna go grab a drink and join the fray.” You said, hating the way your voice sounded so small against the echoing walls of the bathroom tiles.

Daniel snapped his eyes to yours, holding them intently, slightly alarmed at your words.

The last thing he wanted was for you to leave him; call it soppy, but he wanted to make up for lost time as soon as he possibly could, and he knew there would be very few opportunities considering both your careers were so demanding.

“Um…” he cleared his throat, “Yeah, I just want to say, thanks for all of this.” He gestured down to his hand, and you smiled.

“No problem. Just…stay away from broken glass for a bit and you should be fine.” You mumbled, words not registering in your brain as Daniel breathed a small laugh, looking utterly starstruck and sad at the same time.

“I’ll try my best.”

You offered one last smile, checking you still had your bag, and without another word you slipped out of the bathroom door, hearing the handle click behind you.

You could still hear the thumping remnants of the party in the next room, and without really caring who you bumped into along the way, you made a beeline for the kitchen, filling up a plastic wine glass with the nearest spirit and downing it as quickly as possible. You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, immediately feeling guilty because of the early shift, and hurried to fill the glass back up with water, trying your best to dispel the effects of alcohol before they even had an impact.

It seemed to work.

Your head was spinning, unrelated to the liquids you’d just absorbed, but because of the bathroom fiasco that had just occurred only moments prior.

You were that caught up in your own thoughts, trying to separate fact from fiction and thought from feeling, that you completely missed the very brunette on your mind stride past the kitchen and into the living area, looking like a man on a mission as he tried to seek out Theo.

It didn’t take him long, he just had significantly more trouble trying to shake off a blonde that refused to let go of his arm, and he found Theo leant against a table, looking worn out, his mind absent from reality.

In the time it took for you to patch Daniel up, it looked as if Theo had faced a war and somehow escaped.

“You okay?” Daniel asked, hand clapping into Theo’s shoulder in an attempt to bring him back to reality.

He jumped, immediately relaxing when he registered just who was standing in front of him.

“I’m fine, but if that…person over there takes another step towards my Grandma, he’s not going to know what hit him.” He answered, finger pointing at a rather suspicious looking man.

“I don’t see a Grandma anywhere.” Daniel pointed out, slightly concerned.

Theo rolled his eyes, as if he’d had to answer the question a million times already, “She’s the purple one on the mantelpiece.” He muttered, taking a swig of whatever was in his glass.

Daniel nodded, feeling guilty for even bringing up the topic, but the completely detached behaviour from Theo was giving him a hard time in focusing on what he actually came over to do.

“Sorry about that, mate.” He apologised, breathing in deeply.

Theo shrugged.

“Anyway, does Y/N still have the same phone number or did she change it?” Daniel questioned, attempting to pretend like the question wasn’t that big of a deal by shrugging and avoiding making eye contact with Theo, but the raise of the eyebrow and curious, piercing blue stare proved that his attempt was futile.

“I knew you still liked her.” Theo chuckled.

“Am I that transparent?” Daniel quipped, pressing his lips together in a tight line.

“Only for me.” Theo grinned, patting Daniel’s cheek.

Daniel pulled a face, swiping Theo’s hand away.

“But no, she’s still got the same number. Why’d you ask?”

Daniel shrugged, already backing away, attention flickering around the room, once again searching for something — the action of which didn’t go unnoticed by Theo, who positively cackled inside, “Just curious.”

“If curious means ‘I-fucked-up-with-a-really-good-person-big-time-and-I-need-to-make-it-up-somehow-before-I-ask-her-out-for-real-this-time-instead-of-practicing-it-in-the-mirror’, then, whatever you say.”

“That was ages ago!”

“People don’t forget!” Theo yelled, smirking in triumph as Dan disappeared around the corner, no doubt searching for you.

You were sitting on the cold, stone steps outside the apartment building, your phone in your hand and debating whether or not to call a taxi or walk home before it gets too dark.

Your thumb was hovering over the call button to your local taxi when the building doors slammed open, the sound of shoes slapping against the concrete as a tall figure leapt down the last three steps, running a hand through their curls in frustration as they looked left, then right, and sighed, reaching into their jacket pocket to produce their phone.

You couldn’t see their face, only the back of their head, but you’d recognise that figure anywhere.

You looked down, your heart stuttering at the sudden buzzing of the phone in your hand.

You narrowed your eyes, resisting the urge to laugh at the hilarity of the situation, and answered the call, lifting the phone up to your ear, your eyes fixated on the pacing figure on the pavement, watching him from your spot at the top corner of the stairs.

“Hello?” The person asked, sounding a bit breathless through the phone.

“Hi.”

“It’s Daniel...Ricciardo.” He winced at his own awkwardness.

“I know. You’re still saved in my contacts.”

“I am?” He replied, tone laced with shock.

You were almost embarrassed to admit that you’d held onto a little shred of hope in thinking he’d eventually get over himself, “You had a paddy with me, remember?”

“About that, I’m really sorry. Like, really, really, really,really, really—”

“I get the idea.” You sighed.

“No, I don’t think you understand how sorry I am for it. It was so insanely stupid of me to stop talking to you because of something I thought I heard in a club — a fucking club of all places — without even thinking of talking to you—”

“Why didn't you talk to me?”

He was silent for a while, and you noticed he’d halted his pacing on the pavement. “I know it sounds like I’m making up excuses, but I really thought you hated my guts, and that...it hurt because I kind of had a bit of a crush on you and I pushed you away because I think a subconscious part of my mind thought that if I did that then it would be better in the long run because I wouldn’t be so attached to you if something went weird later on.” He explained, his voice lowering and quieting towards the end, as if he’d just understood what he didn’t understand.

“That’s...a lot to unpack.” You murmured, noticing the way his shoulders had slumped.

“Yeah...we don’t have to do it right now, though.”

“No, I agree, I think we’d need a nicer place to sort though our emotional struggles than outside Theo’s apartment building.”

“Yeah, it’s a bit weird — what?” He caught himself, spinning around on his heels.

You offered a shy wave once he’d tilted his head in your direction, realising you’d been watching him talk to you the entire time.

“I was looking for you.” He said once he’d hung up the phone, meeting you halfway on the steps.

“Why?”

“Can I walk you home?” He resorted to asking.

_____

The journey home took about twice as long as it usually would, and by the time you’d both made it onto your street, night was beginning to creep through, the sky changing to a darker blue, street lamps beginning to turn on.

The conversation flowed remarkably easily, albeit there was a noticeable hesitance in dancing around that subject, but you pretended not to notice it, and you had a feeling Daniel was trying to do the same.

He kept glancing at you out of the corner of his eye, almost disbelieving of that fact that you were in front of him, even after what he’d put you through, and he had to keep catching himself to ensure you didn’t notice him looking.

You did.

“So, how are you feeling about going back after the Summer Break?”

He stifled a smile, “I don’t know why, but I have a really good feeling about going back. You know what? It has to be those Haribo’s.” He breathed a laugh.

“What? I hand out magic Haribo?” You smirked, shaking your head in disbelief.

“Yep.”

“No.”

“You say that now, but you’ll take it back when I get a podium.”

“When you do win, just don’t go around telling everyone about my magic Haribo.”

“Oh, the Haribo are reserved for me and for me only. It won’t have the same effect if you give some to Lando.”

“I’ll just take your word for it, I guess.”

You breathed a laugh, coming to a halt on the pavement, the familiar house standing to your left.

Daniel looked up.

“I thought you had a Fiesta?” He asked, pointing to the blue Hyaundi parked on the driveway.

“I’m sorry, is my car not up to the standard you’re used to?” You questioned, raising an eyebrow teasingly in his direction.

“Oi, I’ll have you know that I learnt to drive in a — I can’t even remember what model it was, but I do remember having to really press down on the brake…and the air con was broken.” He defended, throwing his hands up as if to say he was surrendering.

You bit your lip, “I learnt to drive in a Mercedes.”

His reaction was priceless.

“A Mercedes? You learnt to drive in a—wow.”

“It was just the company car, I didn’t really have a choice.”

“Still…wow.” He paused, feet tapping the pavement agitatedly, “I have a proposal.”

You met his eyes, unable to help feeling slightly anxious by the prospect.

“Go on.” You encouraged, crossing your arms tightly.

“If I win a GP…wait—can we make a deal?” He asked, throwing his hand out.

You nodded.

“If I win a GP, I get to take you on a date.” He offered, raising one eyebrow but somehow maintaining eye contact.

“But…what’s in it for me?” You smirked.

He scoffed, rolling his eyes, “That’s so rude…but, okay…I take you to Monza, and if—when I win a GP, I get to take you out. For my own sake, I’m gonna pretend like I will win one because I don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t.”

“You’ll win one.” You stated simply, shrugging.

“What makes you so sure of that?”

“Because you’re Daniel Ricciardo, when have you ever not been successful in a car?” You asked, pulling a face as if it was obvious from the get-go.

Daniel didn’t say anything after that. He just sort of looked at you, twisting his mouth up in thought. You couldn’t tell what was going through his mind at that moment in time, but you had a sneaking suspicion he was trying to believe your words.

“You really believe that?” He finally said, a hint of what sounded like insecurity laced in his tone.

“You don’t?” You shot back, your heart breaking slightly at his demeanour.

“I never left.” He mumbled under his breath, turning away from you slightly with furrowed brows, seemingly having a conversation with himself.

You knew those words would stick around in your mind for a long time.

But there was something so addictive about ‘Daniel Ricciardo wins the 2021 Italian Grand Prix’.

[akaashisupremacy]

Fated

Summary: You’re dating your ex-fiancee Gojo again, but your relationship hits a crucial crossroad. Do you stay or do you go?

Gojo Satoru  x reader

Multi-fandom Masterlist || HQ Masterlist || Ao3 version

Genre: fluff, angst, exes to friends to lovers   

“You’re hiding something from me.” Gojo Satoru confronts you as you step onto the hallway for spare rooms in Jujutsu Tech.

He is in your way. You try not to get irritated.

“No, I’m not.” you snap. It’s been a long day. You don’t need this. You push him aside and keep walking. Gojo is irritably good at sniffing things out.

He swiftly appears before you again and blocks your way, “What is it?”

“I missed my period.” You stop and cross your arms, “If you really wanna know.”

“Oh.” He mumbles softly. He looks incredulous, as if he is yet to be sure of what he just heard. You walk past him.

“Oh.” he repeats again, eyes widening as the weight of your words dawn. He turns to you.

You leave him standing there, arrested and head to your room. You’re too tired for this.

Gojo watches you enter your room and lie down. He tries to offer you something to eat since you look so pallid under the fluorescent light of the room.

“I’m not hungry. Just sleepy.” you yawn, waving dismissively.

Gojo feels obligated to stay. He looks at you quietly from the door, unable to leave.

“This really isn’t the most opportune of times,” he breathes in, “but are you seeing anyone else?”

“No.” you murmur, “I don’t have the time.”

He walks in to sit beside you, making sure to close the door behind him. You roll over to the other side of the bed away from his gaze.

Gojo knows he is not an easy person to be with. He’s your ex-fiancée for one thing, and he struggles with monogamy for another.

Being able to be intimate with you again was a chance only the gods could’ve intervened. And now that chance is starting to fade. He lies down beside you, his eyes towards the ceiling. At the start of your relationship, it was him who was hesitant. Things are reversed tonight.

“I don’t want to talk. Go away.” you cut in before he says anything, “I’m seeing a doctor soon to make sure.”

He nods understandingly and quietly, but slowly pads out of the room. The weight of the floor lightly creaks under his footsteps. The silence between the two of you dominates the hall.

————————————————————————————

There was a time when you were younger that you would visit Gojo in his family home. After dinner, you’d sneak outside to his family garden to capture fireflies in paper lanterns.

That was a much different time of course. Since then, you’ve been arranged to be married, broken up and begun precariously seeing each other again after ten years.

“Why are you wading around in the darkness?” he asks, sitting on a pile of rocks, his hands inside his pockets.

Neither of you are really kids anymore, but your fondness for fireflies remains. On your occasional stays in Jujutsu Tech for your sorcery job, you like to spend your down time in the gardens at night.

“I need a break from people.” you comment succinctly.

You’re both quiet from a moment. Gojo becomes too impatient for you to start the conversation.

“So what did the doctor say?” Curiosity overcame him.

You lower your lantern by your side, making sure to face away from him as you reply, “She tried to ask if I was married and if my family knew.”

You turn around quickly, waving your hands before he can react, “You don’t need to worry. I’m considering not keeping it...it’s too much time and work…and it made me think about us. I think we should just end things…whatever this is.”

Gojo knew that this day would come. Deep down, he already prepared himself for when your relationship would end. Yet instead of acceptance, indignance rises in his chest.

“How could you let me go so easily? How are you done with us?” he finds himself saying.

He knew his disinterest in monogamy would come to bite him back someday, but he hadn’t imagined himself in a deeply romantic and emotional relationship with you when it happened.

You shake your head. The sounds of crickets and cicadas keep the silences from being too empty.

“Every year I used to wait to see if this was the year we reconciled. If this was the year we would fix things, not necessarily be lovers, but to just be back in each other's lives.” You look to the stars, sitting in a large rock beside him, “I waited maybe 11 years to see it happen even if I didn’t know if it would come at all. And I can wait another lifetime to try again. But I think in this life, our time has to end. This isn’t going to work out, Satoru.”

Gojo feels as if his lungs will collapse. It hurts him even more to know that you do love him but you’d rather he be out of your life.

“Why would you wait another lifetime for me when I’m here now?” he murmurs.

“I can’t have you to myself.” you say simply, “I can’t take this anymore. Even if I’m not pregnant, I want to be the only one in your life.”

“You are the most important person in my life.” he grabs your hand to reassure you. You don’t resist.

You face him, tears running down your eyes, “Then I don’t understand how you can say that and still need someone else.”

Gojo feels his chest crushed with heaviness. The weight spreads to his back, his arms and neck. For the first time in years, he feels helpless.

“We knew this was coming.” you mutter, pulling your hand away to make your exit out of the garden.

Gojo does not chase after you. He notices his bandages are wet.

————————————————————————

Gojo walks around in a daze for the next few days. People always say that he is a man who has everything, but for now he is the man with only questions without answers.

How can he make you stay?

“Gojo,” Utahime nudge, “GOJO!”

She sharply jabs a finger by his side to bring him back to reality. He jerks back, accidentally hitting the wooden walls of the hallway with a resounding thud.

“Are you even listening to me?” she hisses. He hasn’t been paying attention at the school meeting and her temper is rising. How can he go around doing the bare minimum and still be so praised. She was ready to throw a fit.

“Well…we’re kind of expecting…but we might not keep the baby…and ahh…” he uses his full concentration to string together his thoughts.

Utahime stops in her tracks and rubs her temples. Every other conversation she has with him always sends her reeling.

She crosses her arms together, “Let me guess, one of you wants to keep the kid and the other doesn’t?”

“OMIGOSH YES!” Gojo raises his hands as if someone finally gets him, “How did you know?!”

Utahime looks slightly alarmed at his expression. Protective of your privacy, she looks left and right to see if anybody is nearby. She shrugs.

Gojo continues, “These past few days have made me realize how badly I want a family with them. I really want this! Except it made them realize they want a family with someone else…and I’m not sure there’s anything I can do to make them feel the same way.”

His voice softens towards the end of his sentence as he slowly sinks back into his thoughts.

Utahime takes a moment before dispensing her bit of wisdom.

“Having a child with someone is an incredibly huge sacrifice. If you really want this…then you have to make a sacrifice equal in weight. Whatever that will be…” she sighs, adjusting her kimono. “And I have a feeling you haven’t properly explained to her what an open relationship is.”

She peers at him from the side of her eye. His guilty expression confirms her suspicions.

Every now and then, Utahime feels envious of his power. However, today is not one of those days. He has some hard choices to face she would not want to deal with.

—————————————————————— “Hey!”

A week after your last conversation, Gojo spots you in the school and immediately rushes towards you.

In panic, you shove yourself into an empty meeting room and try to shut the door. He jams his foot between the ledge and determinedly peers you from the door crack.

“Oh no, you are not shutting me out. We are going to talk like proper adults.” he insists.

Your instincts kick in. You kick his feet and push him back. You bolt the door shut and slump down behind it. You’re safe for now.

“You can’t keep running away.” he breathes out from the other side, “We need to talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you quickly rebut, “Gojo, I have no family. There’s no one to help me. I’m going to be alone if this kid comes out of me.”

Your voice fades hoarsely as you utter the last few words.

“You have me.” his soothes in a contemplative voice.

You want to laugh. This relationship was doomed from the start. You were such a masochist for even trying. You must have been consumed with your attraction to him.

Gojo was no different though— he couldn’t help himself. You both want each other too much and now you both were paying the price.

You shake your head, “You’ll just leave me when things get tough. I’m tired of cleaning after your mess. Why can’t you just let me have my way?”

Gojo has no time to be taken aback.

“Because I don’t want a family with anyone else. I’m desperate to make this work with you.” he pleads, “ Don’t push me away. I have my own doubts about myself, and I understand where you’re coming from but I wish you believed in me more.”

You pretend not to hear him.

“I’ll be here for you and our baby, even if it's not always romantic.” he adds, his voice pleading, “I know you’re terrified that I’ll just leave you but…”

You interrupt him by opening the door. As if on instinct he hides his vulnerability from you. His posture leans back coolly, waiting on your next move.

“Gojo, I’m just frustrated to always be at the mercy of your choices. Don’t you understand?”

His lips part slowly, “If you’re not ready for a family, it’s fine. But don't you want to make this last longer?”

——————————————————

“Oh, Satoru, what have we done?” you quietly murmur, staring at the ceiling of his room.

It’s your first night in his faculty dormitory. You’ve never really been before. His room is too close to the principal’s for a casual date night visit.

Gojo’s long switched off the lights but neither of you can sleep.

“What do you mean? The baby or the wedding?” he chuckles.

You shrug, “Both?”

You shift around the sheets, the linen ruffling under your movement.

He crosses his arms and turns to you, “Well, we’ve established that the first one was an accident. The wedding—well—it’s mostly so you and the baby will be under the protection of the Gojo clan.”

Gojo promised to close his open relationship status until your kid is one and you take his word for it. It is perplexing that the wedding was his idea too. However there was something about his sincerity that you could not refuse

“How long till we regret all this?” you half-murmur, half-sigh.

“Honestly, probably every time we hit a rough patch. But we’re not meant to always be happy anyways.” he sighs lying on his arm. It’s an honest enough answer.

You sit up and put your arms around your waist, “Such optimism you have there. So tell me, oh all powerful Satoru, why are we here then?”

“For me, it's to be able to find and meet you.” he says simply.

He catches you off guard with the tenderness of his words. You reach out to touch the side of his face and gently rub your thumb on his cheek. He presses your hand on his cheek.

“If things fell apart again and you had to wait another ten years for us to fix it, would you?”

He asks so quietly you almost don’t hear him.

Your face flushes under the cover of darkness.

“…Yes, I love you too much. This was never going to be just an arranged marriage for me even when we were younger…then again, I think you already know that.” you admit in a shaky whisper.

Now that you've married him, you've given yourself permission acknowledge your true feelings to yourself. You have always been in love with him. And being apart did not changed that.

Propping himself up by the elbow, you realize his face is so close to yours. You can almost feel the wisps of his long lashes on your cheek.

“I know this isn’t your ideal wedding, but this is more than just a shotgun marriage for me too. You are my fated. And you are the only being I want to go through this with—sorcerer, curse or otherwise.”

You try not to giggle at the mention of curses.

“Through this life and the next?” you said with a small smile.

“Through this life and the next.” he assures firmly, squeezing your hand.

You smile widely and he looks at you fondly. These are your favorite moments with him, when you’re at the brink of losing each other in your gazes.

Gojo breaks your shared reverie.

“Can you kiss me?” he grins cheekily, “As your new husband…”

You kiss his forehead without skipping a beat. He flips over, still propping himself by his stomach.

“So what shall we do on our wedding night? Try for twins?” he smirks.

You roll your eyes extra hard to make sure he sees it. Gojo only laughs.

He shuffles out of bed and tosses you your coat, “Well if you really can’t sleep, we might as well go out and see the fireflies. They look bright tonight.”

You put on your coat and smile.

Another lifetime is too far away.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

I wrote this as a follow up for another Gojo x reader fic who used to be engaged. Check out the other parts!

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || Part 6 || Part 7 || Part 8 

A/N: When I first wrote the original four chapters, I had already know that this was how the series would end (even though I didn't plan to write it all the way here). I don't know if I will continue writing. I have some extra material, but I don't really know if I'd like to write it out. If I ever make up my mind to do so, you will see me pop up in your notifs. 

If not, I guess this is the end. if you've gone through all 8 chapters, thank you for joining me in this wild, heartfelt ride! Comment or message to be added to the taglist! Or write down some comments about your feelsssss

Series Taglist: @tokyo-love-hotel@samkysnks@herownescape@cherrianne192@shamelessdonutsludgebanana@kageyamakock@shirostrbl@luvang3l@cloudsinthecosmos@httpjungoo @saturnki  @itstheee-ha-chan@gucci-froggy@soy1melk @dora-the-grownup @cherryonigiri @fiona782 @a--nonymousse @naturakaashi

If you’d like to continue being part of my taglist (JJK or Haikyuu), please let me know! I also write oneshots for both fandoms and soon I’ll be doing BSD too!

[watchmegetobsessed]

Hey Daddy - Bucky Barnes

a/n: so this one is a little more... lighthearted? idk but it was based on THIS request!

pairing: Bucky X Reader

word count: 1.9k

summary: You join Peter and his friends for a game of Truth Or Dare but you wish you stayed in your room when MJ challenges you to do a task that will definitely out your secret relationship with Bucky.

masterlist

You totally forgot Peter would have his friends over for the night, so you’re slightly surprised when you find him with Ned and MJ in the kitchen, but it’s a pleasant one. You’ve been spending a lot of time with him, being the youngest of the adults in the tower, you developed a great friendship with the youngster and his friends.

“Oh, hello guys! Good to see you again!” you beam at the three of them, Ned greeting you with a little wave and a stunned smile on his face. Peter has recently revealed that Ned might have a tiny crush on you, which you find cute. Though you’re more than a decade older than him, you find it endearing he is crushing on you out of all the amazing women on the team.

MJ nods in your way as she munches on her sandwich, if you didn’t know her better you’d think she is annoyed by you judging by the look on her face, but you’ve learned by now that this is her default expression, almost a happy one.

“Hi Y/N!” Peter greets you smiling. “How was your day?” he asks lightly. He is such a good kid, knows his manners and cares so much for others. The men in the tower like to tease him about his soft behavior, but you think it’s such a great trait.

“A little tiring. Training kicked my ass today, but it was fine. What are you guys up to?” you ask, grabbing yourself a canned soda from the fridge.

“MJ wants to play truth or dare, but only because she wants to make us do embarrassing stuff,” Peter huffs looking at the girl who just smiles with a shrug.

“Oh, I love that game! Used to play it a lot at parties too!” you smirk, remembering the times you played with your friends in the basement of your mom’s house.

“You want to play with us?” MJ offers.

“If you don’t mind…”

“Not at all!” Peter smiles, happy to have another person join their little group. Glancing at Ned you see that he is now blushing, the tip of his ears turning red as he keeps his eyes fixed on the screen of his phone. Poor kid will have to learn how to function around women sooner or later.

The game starts out quite innocent, it’s not even the wild version where you’re drinking, though it popped into your head to pour yourself some wine. But then you decided to keep it PG rated for the kids’ sake.

But as more and more rounds go down, the tasks and questions are getting a little… spicy. When MJ turns to you and asks you the question of the game and you answer before you could even think about it, you know you are in trouble.

“Dare,” you answer and want to take it back right away, but you don’t want to look like such a pussy. But then MJ smirks at you devilishly and you consider just walking out before she ruins your whole life.

“Alright, text all the other Avengers ‘Hey Daddy’ and read the responses out loud.”

The boys gasp as you press your lips into a thin line, knowing well it won’t end good on your side. Especially because there is one person whose response you would rather not read out loud.

You’ve been close to Bucky since day one and though you both were a little ignorant towards your feelings, a few months ago you finally moved your relationship a little further than just being friends. However you both agreed it’s better kept as a secret, at least until you figure out where you really want to head together as a couple.

Now, if you text that message to Bucky there’s no way he won’t write back something that would bust your asses right away, but you can’t back out now, you can only hope he is busy doing something else and won’t pay attention to his phone.

Pulling your phone out of your pocket you lean onto the kitchen island as the kids start cheering for you being a badass and accepting the task.

“Just hey daddy, that’s all?” you ask as you open your contacts.

“Maybe add a winking face,” Ned suggests and you shoot him a glare that immediately turns his face red as he shuts his mouth.

“The winking face is a good idea,” MJ nods.

“Thanks, Ned,” you mumble under your breath as you start opening the text threads, sending them all the same message. Tony, Nat, Steve, Banner, Clint, Sam, Strange, even Rhodey and at the end of the list… Bucky.

“And what, now we wait?” Peter asks.

“Place the phone here so we see when you get a reply and you’ll read them, we can move on until then,” MJ tells you, bossing you around like you’re not even a highly trained special agent who could take her out in a blink of an eye.

The first reply comes from Nat who just asks if you’re drunk. Then comes Banner, who sounds offended that you think he could be your father, totally missing the point of the text. Tony teases you about always knowing you had a thing for him, Steve kindly tells you he only sees you as a sister, Clint just reads the text and doesn’t reply. Sam just sends a simple “control yourself” message back while Strange threatens you to block you if you send another text like this again. Rhodey doesn’t even reads it.

You start to feel relieved when about twenty minutes pass by and no reply comes from Bucky. The game moves on and you almost start to forget about the whole task when your phone lights up again and your breathing hitches when you see Bucky’s name appear on the screen.

“Oh, another reply!” MJ beams as she urges you to unlock the phone and read the reply. When you do so and see his text, you almost just hop off the stool and run out of the kitchen. You consider saying something else, pretending like he didn’t write what he did, but MJ doesn’t take the bullshit and her patience runs short so she simply snatches your phone out of your hand and reads the text herself.

“I specifically remember you saying you’re not into that stuff. What else are you keeping from me about our sex life?”

You let out a long and tired sigh as the room falls silent and they all just stare at you in confusion before MJ slowly slides the phone back to you.

“Our sex life? There’s… there’s a you and Bucky?” Peter asks quietly, not sure what to do with the new information. An anxious chuckle slips from between your lips as you try to find a way to get yourself out of this massive trouble, but nothing comes to your mind. You’ve fought aliens, assassins, you were captured, tortured, went on a hundred mission in your life, yet now three kids defeated you with a game of Truth or Dare.

“Well, um… It’s a funny story, you know—I don’t… fuck,” you mumble, scratching the back of your neck.

“Are you like… together or is it just a friends with benefits thing?” MJ question, shooting you a curious look.

You don’t get to answer, because just as you are about to open your mouth, the man in talk walks in, a puzzled look on his face, phone in his hand, probably still dwelling on your latest message. His eyes spot you first, but then he realizes that you’re not alone and he freezes. It’s not that Bucky doesn’t like Peter or his friends, he just feels so far away from people these days, let alone teenagers who are about a century younger than him.

“Oh,” he breathes out, slowly walking closer to you. “Hello guys,” he murmurs shyly, trying to put the picture together as his eyes fall back to you and he sees how uncomfortable you are. Before he could get another word out, MJ speaks up and just as always, her raw style doesn’t disappoint any of you.

“Don’t worry, your girlfriend is not really into the Daddy stuff.”

You almost choke on your own breath as you turn to shoot her a glare, your hand moving to grab Bucky’s arm gently, sensing him growing more and more anxious with each second.

“MJ, I don’t think Sergeant Barnes is the right person to joke around with,” Ned mumbles, avoiding to even look at Bucky as you let out an airy chuckle.

“G-Girlfriend? We are not—“ Bucky starts, but you cut him off.

“No use to deny, Buck. They know it.”

Bucky huffs, closing his eyes for a moment before he moves closer to you, his hand coming to rest on your lower back. Despite the absurdity of the situation, this small little gesture makes your heart pitter-patter in your chest.

“Is there any chance this could stay between us, kids?” you ask with a charming smile, turning to the three troublemakers.

“I don’t know, what do we get out of keeping it a secret?” Peter purses his lips, pretending to have the higher ground, but you already know what’s about to come.

Bucky’s vibranium arm snaps to the counter top as he shoots a death glare over to the poor kid and though he definitely looks like he is ready to kill any moment, you know that it’s all just an act.

“How about I don’t rip your guts out, kid? That enough?” Bucky growls and while all three of them take a step back with wide eyes and dry throats, you just shake your head chuckling, placing a hand to his hard chest.

“Buck, no need to go all winter soldier on them. They’ll keep our secret, right?” you ask with an innocent smile and all three of them start nodding wildly, as if they just saw a ghost.

Seeing their reaction you realize it’s better if the game ends here and you let them be on their own. You thank for the fun time before grabbing Bucky’s arm and pull him out of the kitchen, heading up to your rooms.

“You shouldn’t have scared them that badly, Buck,” you scold him, but you still actually find it kind of funny, seeing their pale faces and fearful eyes at your boyfriend’s tough guy act.

“Well, they scare me too sometimes,” he mumbles shrugging. “Especially that MJ girl… she is just… weird.”

You can’t help but laugh at his words, a six feet tall super soldier with a metal arm being scared of a teenage girl with a big mouth, that’s quite an interesting concept.

“Hey,” you stop him before the two of you would part in the hallway. He turns back and his blue eyes soften on you. “Do you want to… sneak into my room?” you ask, biting into your bottom lip as you smirk up at him, sliding a hand up his chest, cupping his cheek in your palm. “We could have some fun… Daddy.”

“Wait, are you really into the daddy stuff?” he asks with wide eyes, making you cackle with your head falling back.

“Just shut up and come to my room,” you chuckle, pressing your lips against his as you pull him into your bedroom, shutting the door closed behind you.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

[nugnthopkns]

i know you get deja vu

word count: 1.4k

warnings: explicit fem!reader, cursing, it's mild angst up in this b

recommended listening: deja vu | olivia rodrigo

a/n: wrote this short little ditty while avoiding my adult responsibilities lmao. it is not great but i really like the premise, maybe one day i'll do something more with it

Your eyes have to be failing you.

There’s no way he showed up, let alone with another girl – who looks shockingly similar to you. She’s a more polished, more refined version of yourself, and anger bubbles in your stomach the moment you see him walk through the door with her in tow.

When your parents informed you they’d invited Pierre-Luc to your graduation party you shrugged it off. Their reasoning was he’d been a large part of your college experience, and it was sound enough logic. You stumbled across him in a coffee shop during your freshman year and quickly fell into a romance that lasted until a few months ago. The breakup was rather brutal, though your family doesn’t know that, so you didn’t expect him to stop by your parents’ house to congratulate you on completing your degree.

Much to your distaste he does make an appearance, with who you presume to be his new girlfriend. You don’t want to stare at the pair, but you can’t help it – they look good together, possibly better than you and Pierre did. However, you notice that the young woman has on a dress that’s identical to one hanging at the back of your closest. Pierre had bought it for you when you accompanied him to France one offseason, and the thought of him replicating the trip with her crosses your mind.

Finding it too much to be in the same room as him, you excuse yourself from a conversation with some of your father’s business partners and grab your sister by the elbow on the way into the sunroom.

“What’s the matter with you?” She grumbles, upset you pulled her away from a conversation with a boy she has a tiny crush on.

“He’s here,” you whisper shout, doing your best to inconspicuously point to the culprit of your dampened spirits.

“Who?”

“Luc.”

Her expression softens, and it’s clear she feels sorry for you. “Shit. I didn’t think he was actually going to show up.”

You let out a rather strangled laugh. “Me either, but he’s here and I don’t know what to do.”

The two of you stay tucked inside for a few more moments, deriving a plan that gets your ex-boyfriend off the premises as fast as possible without him seeing you. She heads outside first, making sure to grab one of your cousins who’s obsessed with hockey on her way. Together they make a beeline for Pierre, who is beyond excited to catch up with your family. You slip through the door and into a conversation with some fellow graduates in the back corner of the yard. It isn’t interesting, just about future plans, but it keeps you occupied. You’re careful to keep you back turned and your voice low – anything to keep your existence inconspicuous.

Your sister keeps Pierre-Luc busy, chatting to him about how the playoffs went and what his goals for the offseason are. A small crowd gathers around him, mostly just extended family members who haven’t seen him in a while, and he indulges their questions with a kind smile. You can tell your luck is running out, that he’s finally going to spot you in the crowd and rush over to say whatever he came here for. The fates are cruel, and at that moment your mother calls everyone into a circle for a toast.

“I want to thank you all for coming,” she says, pulling you to stand beside her. You can tell Pierre is looking at you, but you avert your eyes and look anywhere but him. Your mother continues talking. “We’re incredibly proud of our daughter for completing her degree, and we can’t wait to see what she does next. If you’re here, we appreciate the role you played in her success. To Y/N!”

Your name is chanted like a chorus, and your eyes meet Pierre’s as he raises his glass. The intensity of his stare makes you blush, and you bury your head into your father’s shoulder, playing it off as being overcome with emotion. More toasts ensue, including one where you thank everyone for their continued support, and then the cake is cut. You try to slip inside, praying that Pierre-Luc and his date will leave, but the devil himself grabs your elbows as you open the back door.

“Congratulations,” he says softly, accent thicker then the last time you heard his voice. You can’t lie to yourself – he looks good. The sunshine has done wonders for his skin, and the tattoos peeking out from his shirt sleeve look new.

“Thank you.”

You offer nothing more to the conversation, which clearly upsets him, but he doesn’t do anything other than knit his brows together. It makes sense that you wouldn’t want to speak to him since the last time you did was the screaming match that ended your relationship. You go to make your exit, but the small girl hanging off Pierre’s side speaks.

“It’s so nice to meet you,” she smiles. “I’m Maisie. Luc talks about you a lot.”

“Pardon?” You’re caught off guard. Why would he talk about you to his new girlfriend?

The man in question shifts uncomfortably, like he’s going to get caught in a lie. “Yeah, it’s so nice that you guys are still friends.”

There it is. Saying that you split amicably is probably the only way he could convince her to attend this stupid party in the first place. “Ah,” you sigh, “Well not everyone is afforded the same luxury.”

Against your better judgement, you compliment her dress. Maisie thanks you graciously, explaining that Pierre bought it for her and once he’s cleared to leave Columbus they’ll be taking a trip to France, with a pit-stop in Portugal because she’s never been. Your insides churn, but you manage to keep a glaringly fake smile plastered on your face. The conversation shifts, and you find out that she also studies English Literature and expects to graduate next year. You laugh off all the coincidences, but it’s obvious to you and Pierre-Luc that Maisie is a substitute for the person who came before her.

“Why don’t you go get us some drinks babe?” Pierre asks, and the girl skips away after reaching on her tip-toes to press a kiss to his cheek.

You fiddle nervously with the hem of your dress, anxious to be alone with him. “It isn’t what it looks like,” he starts, but you cut him off.

“It’s exactly what it looks like Luc, and don’t you fucking dare say otherwise.”

He lets out a defeated sigh. “So what if it is? I think it’s glaringly obvious that I still love you.”

No shit you think, but you bite your tongue and say something more respectable. “I’d say so. She’s exactly like me, but hopefully she won’t mind being asked to put her whole life on hold.” There’s a bite to your tone that you can’t help, but it sets Pierre-Luc on edge.

“You can’t still be fucking on about that.”

You’re seeing red now, irate that he is still choosing to minimize your emotions. “I am! Because you asked me not to continue school, which is something I explicitly told you I wanted to do, just so I could be a more conventional NHL girlfriend. And then you broke up with me when I said I wouldn’t do it.” You inhale a deep breath before continuing. “I hope you have fun with Maisie in France. You should take her to that little café we went to, in Bordeaux, where we ate so much food we couldn’t walk back to the hotel. And I hope that every time she looks at you like you hang the moon, you remember that you’re recycling our entire relationship because you let it fall apart at the seams.”

Perhaps your emotions got the best of you, because the look on Pierre-Luc’s face is nothing short of shock. You’re taken aback too – your parents raised you better than to say hurtful things, but seeing him again brought up a myriad of things you hadn't yet dealt with. Without another word, you spin on your heel and head inside, slamming the door behind you. It shouldn’t upset you this much, after so many months, but for a reason you’re unwilling to admit to yourself it does.

You sit in the bay window of your childhood bedroom, wrapped in a blanket even though it’s the beginning of summer, and watch as Pierre-Luc presses a kiss to her forehead before thanking your parents for inviting him one last time. Just like him, every relationship you have for the rest of your life will be an attempt to replicate the love you had for Pierre – a never-ending circle of deja vu.

☼☼☼☼

taglist: @samsteel @kiedhara @tortito @boqvistsbabe @iwantahockeyhimbo @himbos-on-ice @2manytabsopen if you want to be added shoot me an ask :)

[hb-writes]

The Walk-In Appointment

Summary: From the Little Lady Blinder universe. Clara learns to walk a bit later than her twin, but once she does there’s no stopping her from following her big brother around wherever he goes. Set in May 1909.

Characters: Tommy Shelby, Ada Shelby, Arthur Shelby, Polly Gray, and Clara Shelby

Warnings: Swearing

Hope you enjoy this little piece since the next chapter isn’t coming yet. This was inspired by the lovely @cecii22me​’s ask and I’m so absolutely softened by the idea of Clara learning to walk and chasing around her ‘Ta’ / ‘TaTa’ as that’s what I’ve decided she’d call Tommy before she could get the whole name out properly.

-----

Ada stood her little sister up on her feet, holding her small hands as she encouraged a bit of walking. Clara humored Ada for a few steps, always did so, but lowered herself to the ground as soon as Ada tried to pull her hands away.

Finn took his first steps a few months before his twin sister, toddling around on the first floor and out into the shop if they left the doors open with little care for his own safety. He’d taken the first steps while walking towards his mother’s outstretched arms, the baby’s smiling face as he moved towards her a bright spot in what had come to be some tiring and difficult days for the woman. 

But five months later, Clara still hadn’t shown an interest. Since their mother’s passing, the baby had become more clingy, more likely to request a sibling’s or her aunt’s arms, searching every adult face around her for that of her missing mother. She’d crawl, when necessary, but more often stayed put, playing quietly by herself while Finn made a mess of things around her.��

Polly told her niece and nephews to not worry about Clara’s lack of steps. One toddling Shelby was more than enough to handle and each of them had walked at different times. Clara was the latest of the six Shelby children though, now three months past her first birthday. 

“Let her be, Ada,” Polly chided as Ada tried to force her younger sister up again, the toddler putting up a great protest and pulling against Ada’s hold as she tried to get back to the ground. 

Ada stopped fighting with Clara, instead pulling the girl up to rest on her skinny hip. “Finny walked ages ago, Clara. Don’t you want to walk?”

“Your sister will walk when she’s ready,” Polly answered. “I can’t imagine why you’re surprised she’s just as stubborn as the rest of you.” 

Ada kissed her sister’s cheek and Clara settled against Ada’s chest for a moment, her little version of a hug.

“You’re not stubborn, are you, lovey? You’re just a sweet little thing.” Ada rubbed her sister’s back. “A sweet little lovey who wants to try walking for sissy one last time.”

Ada set Clara on her feet at the moment Tommy walked through the front door, disturbing the peace of the front room as he let it slam behind him. 

Tommy passed his aunt and sisters without a word on his way to the shop, ignoring the baby’s incessant repeating of his name, a continuous stream of ‘Ta Ta Ta Ta’ growing louder as he disappeared from her view. 

Ada released her sister’s hands to cover her ears, anticipating the unrelenting shriek that had become commonplace when the baby didn’t get what she wanted, but it didn’t come. Clara continued chanting after Tommy, taking her first steps as she shouted after her brother.

Polly glanced up from the paper at Ada’s excited squeal.

“I told you she’d walk when ready,” she offered, setting the paper aside and standing up.

Clara tumbled at the threshold to the shop, falling back on her bottom. Ada stepped forward to help her sister only to be stopped by Polly’s hand on her wrist.

Clara’s face scrunched up as she tugged on the thick curtains using them to stand up and gripping them until she was safely over the threshold. 

Clara’s shouting for Tommy grew louder as she stepped into the shop, her little voice trying to overcome the volume of the scattered conversations taking place. Despite not clearly seeing Tommy, she took no deviations in her route as she headed towards Arthur’s office, the only place she’d ever come in the shop, always carried there on someone’s hip to visit the oldest Shelby brother. 

Tommy caught sight of her steps only because a lull in the noise of the shop caused him to back out of Arthur’s doorway and look around, his sister’s shout perfectly timed to the sudden silence of the room. 

He’d come home annoyed about some decision made about the horses, about to tell Arthur off, but he felt that anger leave him as he registered what was happening, the baby toddling towards him, her fair curls bouncing with each determined step. There was something new in her little gap-toothed smile, something in her serious uttering of the name she’d bestowed upon him months ago, the sound interspersed with her self-satisfied giggles, and it all made Tommy forget what he’d come in for in the first place because it was the most animated he’d seen the baby in months, the closest to happy he’d felt in months.

Arthur, Ada, and Polly were all watching by now, too, an almost foreign feeling which felt decidedly close to bliss swelling in them as Clara reached Tommy’s side. The baby gripped the fabric of her brother’s trousers in her small hands, tugging as she looked up to him.

“Up, Ta, up!”

Tommy leaned down to pull the girl into his arms, kissing her head. “Hello there, Clara girl.” 

“Of course her first steps would be following after you,” Ada said, her arms crossed over her chest as she leaned against one of the tables.

“Oh, don’t be jealous, Ada,” Arthur said, rubbing his finger along the baby’s cheek. “I had your first steps. It’s only fair Tommy gets Clara’s.” 

Clara put her palm to Tommy’s cheek, turning him towards her when his eyes moved to follow the conversation of their siblings.

“No, TaTa, no,” she said, her little voice sharp. “No. No. No.”

She grasped Tommy’s hand and swatted it. “No, Ta!”

Ada snorted, giggles escaping her lips as she watched the baby, her brow still furrowed despite appearing to be finished with her chastising.

“You’re in fucking trouble now, Tommy,” Arthur said, chuckling.

The handful of times the twins had picked up something they weren’t supposed to, done some little bit wrong, or put themselves in some unsafe predicament, they’d gotten a little warning tap on the hand. 

“What’s that for, my girl?” Tommy asked, trying to keep a straight face. 

“You’ve been bad, Thomas, ignored her when you came through just now,” Polly answered. “And Arthur, find better words, please. I don’t want the baby repeating that one.” 

Tommy shifted the toddler in his arms. “Is that it, my girl? Ta didn’t say hello so you decided to walk in here to let me have it?” He kissed her head. “I’m very sorry, sweet girl. I should’ve said hello.”

Clara was already cuddling into his chest, giving a hug, her little hands gripping his shirt and Tommy waited, resting his chin on her head and letting her cuddle a bit before placing her on the floor beside him. 

“Alright, you go off to Ada now or she’ll pout the rest of the evening,” Tommy encouraged, wishing he hadn’t yet started the conversation with Arthur. He’d much rather pass the hour before supper with Clara, but he had little choice in it now. 

“C’mon. Show us those big girl steps and I’ll see you for supper.” 

Clara took two steps towards her sister’s outstretched hands, turning back when Tommy stepped into Arthur’s office. 

“Ta!” she said, holding a hand out to him. 

Tommy took a deep breath, unable to hide his smile as he looked down at her.

“TATA!” she yelled, walking back to him. 

“Give me a minute, Arthur,” Tommy said, taking one of Clara’s hands, stooping a bit to one side as she led him from the shop and back to the sitting room with Ada and Polly. Tommy settled her on the floor and played with his sisters for a few moments before standing up. 

“I’ll be back,” he promised. “You stay with Ada.” 

Tommy was grateful for Ada’s distraction, grateful that they didn’t have to suffer a tantrum because he wasn’t sure he’d be able to not give in to her on it.

Tommy and Arthur were just settling in to talk when there was a banging at the office door, a firm repetition of knocks.

“Christ, can’t even have a fucking conversation in this place. Get that, Tommy, won’t you?”

Tommy stood up and pulled his brother’s door open, glancing down at the threshold to see their visitor.

“We have a walk-in appointment, Arthur.”

“A what?” Arthur asked, unable to see a thing beyond his desk. 

“A walk-in. Our Clara’s here demanding an audience.” Tommy lifted the girl into his arms.

“Well, best let her in, then,” Arthur answered. “No hope in her staying where’s she’s told now. We really are fucked.” 

“Fuck!” Clara said, the same self-satisfied grin on her face as when she’d walked towards Tommy, her giggles filling the room as Tommy and Arthur both started laughing. 

“I won’t tell Aunt Polly if you don’t,” Arthur said. 

“I don’t think it’s me you have to bargain with to keep the secret, Arthur,” Tommy answered as he settled the giggling girl on his lap.

“Fuck,” Arthur said again, covering his mouth as the three siblings dissolved into laughter once again, Tommy and Arthur finding themselves entirely incapable of returning to their previous discussion with the little girl shouting out her new favorite word every time their laughter subsided.

———

Little Lady Blinder Masterlist.

------

🏷: @midnight-dreams-23 @cecii22me @pollyrepents @mo-onstarrs

[fific7]

Ticket to Ride - Part 5

Billy Russo x Reader

A/N: Inspired by The Beatles song of the same name. This takes place in my S1 Punisher AU with Arrogant!Billy in attendance, in which he gets a taste of his own medicine.

Warnings: 18+ NSFW due to sexual content, including oral and unprotected, between consenting adults* in some chapters. Drinking and swearing.

*Irl, please don’t go wild in the country without protection.

(My photo edit)

𝕄𝕪 𝕓𝕒𝕓𝕪 𝕕𝕠𝕟'𝕥 𝕔𝕒𝕣𝕖

𝕄𝕪 𝕓𝕒𝕓𝕪 𝕕𝕠𝕟'𝕥 𝕔𝕒𝕣𝕖

𝕄𝕪 𝕓𝕒𝕓𝕪 𝕕𝕠𝕟'𝕥 𝕔𝕒𝕣𝕖

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy had begun to doze off in the warmth of the gathering dusk, so when he heard her voice saying his name, he was startled. He swung round to where she was standing behind him then leapt up and went to her, folding her into his arms and just hugging her, saying nothing.

After a few short moments, she pushed back from him and stepped away, began walking towards the hotel. “I’m going to take a shower, Billy. Then I think we should go somewhere and eat. And talk,” she said over her shoulder.

“Okay, sweetheart, I’ll be here waitin’ on you.”

At least she let me hug her, he thought.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Walking out of the hotel and across the courtyard after your shower, you saw Billy lying flat out across the park bench, boots on the ground and long legs bent at the knees where the seat ended. His eyes were closed and you realised he’d dozed off.

“Billy.” No response. “Billy!” slightly louder. Still no movement. You reached out a hand, shook his shoulder and jumped slightly when his hand shot out and grabbed your wrist. His dark brown eyes were wide open now and staring up at you, and he immediately let go of you. “Ahhh… sorry sweetheart, didn’t realise it was you.” “Spidey senses not working any longer, Marine?” He grinned up at you, before moving and standing up next to you. “You’re to blame, kitten. I’m losing sleep over you.”

You scoffed, “Uhuh. Sure you are. Well, let’s get this show on the road. I’ve got a rec from the reception guy for dinner.” You turned and started walking quickly towards the alleyway, Billy taking only two long strides to catch up with you. “Where we headed?” “Just a little way along the waterfront, past that big church - Il Redentore. There’s a restaurant with tables right next to the water, called ‘I Figli delle Stelle’. Means ‘Children of the Stars’.” You’d turned your head towards him as you spoke and he smirked at you, “Sounds romantic, angel.” Eye roll from you, “That wasn’t my intention, believe me. The reception guy said it would still be pretty quiet at this time of the evening, later on it’ll get busy as the locals eat dinner around 9.30 or 10 pm.”

“Oh, okay,” he said, sounding a little despondent, “I hear ya.” The two of you walked in single file as you made your way through the alleyway, and Billy hurried to get back next to you as you turned right at the waterfront. There was a tense silence as you walked, and you surely weren’t going to be the one to break it. You could tell that Billy was antsy as hell and you were glad… he should be, the big douchebag. After a few moments, he asked, “How much further is this place?” like a kid on a day trip. “I think it’s that group of tables along there,” you answered, “so only a couple of minutes.” Billy wasn’t the most patient of men. “Okay,” he mumbled.

Lordy, he was getting more tense by the minute, you could feel negative energy coming off him in waves. You knew Billy, knew he’d be dreading talking about what he’d done, his feelings, having to (no doubt) apologise over and over. Serves you right, you big bastard, you thought.

Arriving beside the restaurant tables, you noted that only two tables were occupied so you should be able to have a certain amount of privacy in which to hear Billy’s confession. Checking for ‘reserved’ signs, you chose a table in the row right next to the water, well away from the other patrons. The maitre d’ appeared next to you holding two menus, and you asked in Italian if it was okay to sit at the table you’d chosen. Assured that it was fine, he asked if you wanted to order drinks and you asked for a large glass of rosé Prosecco and a Peroni for Billy. As he nodded and walked away, Billy asked, “Whaddya order for me?” You started laughing and he stared at you, puzzled. “Billy… with a last name like Russo I cannot believe you don’t know that Peroni is an Italian beer!”

He looked shamefaced, “Yeah, yeah, okay! So I’m a terrible Italian-American. Thanks for orderin’ a beer for me, not in the mood for wine.” You and Billy began reading through the menu, suitably impressed by the delicious-sounding dishes on offer. The drinks appeared shortly afterwards, and you made your choices - Billy had decided on a steak, and you’d chosen seafood linguine. You clinked your glass to Billy’s beer bottle, “Salut.” Billy grinned, “Yeah, so here’s me - the Italian-American - and there’s you, the all-American girl, Italian rollin’ off your tongue. I didn’t know you spoke it, sweetheart.” You smirked at him as you sipped your chilled Prosecco, “Seems like there’s a lot of things you don’t know about me, Billy. Like… how I will not tolerate cheating in any way, shape or form.”

A pained look crossed his face. Yeah, Billy… time to spill.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy took a long swig of his beer and cleared his throat. Here goes nothing, he thought. She was studying his face like it was a painting hanging in a gallery.

“I’ve been an asshole.”

She nodded, “I know you have, Billy. Cheating 1.01 - don’t lie about working late and then come home smelling of booze and another woman’s perfume. Oh… and a big smear of her lipstick on the inside collar of one of your shirts.” He winced, looking away, not able to meet her eyes. He twirled the beer bottle round a few times on the table top and finally met her gaze again. “Yeah, not smart, I agree. But… angel, I didn’t actually cheat on you. Not as such.”

She laughed, but it was not a happy sound. “Not as such?! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He reached across and put his hand over hers, but she pulled hers away. “Frankie and I got into some shit with Homeland - to do with Afghanistan back when we were servin’.” He saw her eyebrows rise, and hurried on, “We sorted alla-that out with them, but had to agree to carry out a joint operation with them on somethin’ related to it. We found out that our liaison agent - Dinah Madani - was holdin’ back some critical information from us and we needed to know what and why, and make sure she didn’t do it in future.”

Taking a sip of her Prosecco she laughed, again without humour. “Don’t tell me, she wears Eternity.” He looked at her, confused, “What?” “Her perfume, Billy, her perfume.” He shrugged, “I really dunno.” “That’s not good, Billy. She’ll be expecting you to buy her some for her birthday.” He’d been drinking his beer and he brought the bottle back down with a bang. “No! I won’t be buyin’ anything for her anytime, okay?” he hissed at her, aware that the other diners’ heads had turned towards them at the loud noise his beer bottle had made on the table top. He leant in further towards her but then spotted the waiter heading their way with their plates, and moved back in his seat.

Silence fell again, even after the waiter had gone. Napkins unfolded and placed on laps, cutlery picked up, sips of drinks taken, first forkfuls of food eaten, gazing at Venice across the canal.

Billy cut another piece of his fillet steak, looking down at his plate while saying in a low voice, “I knew Madani had the hots for me. An’ I… I used that to my advantage.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

You were thoughtfully chewing your mouthful of linguine, swallowing it before picking up your flute of Prosecco and sipping from it. He was silent, also chewing, still not meeting your eye. Let him pick this back up, you thought and sat back slightly, silent.

His eyes slowly raised to yours, apprehension apparent in them. Another throat clearing, another swig of beer…. a big one. Oh ho, you thought, whatever was about to come out must be really bad. You were mad at him but at the same time couldn’t deny you were dreading what you were about to hear.

“I… uh.. took her out a few times for drinks after work. Made out with her a couple times after we left the bar…” he gulped visibly, “Uh… felt her up, let her feel me up.” He broke eye contact, grabbed the beer bottle again and took a huge drink, muttering “Sorry, I’m really sorry,” before looking fearfully at you once more. You stared back at him and hoped your face was expressionless. You actually wanted to smack him in the face and stalk off back to your hotel, but that masochistic streak goaded you to say, “Oh yeah? ….And?” He narrowed his eyes, “And what?” “Exactly, Billy - and what? You’re seriously telling me that was it? It stopped right there?” He nodded vigorously, “Yeah! Yes, sweetheart - it did, I swear!”

Picking up your glass once more, you said in a low voice, “Sorry, Billy, I don’t believe you. I think you took her to some shitty motel and the two of you fucked. Maybe more than once.” His face flushed but then you realised he was angry, not caught out in a lie.

“No,” he said between gritted teeth, “I. Did. Not!” emphasising each word with a thump of his hand on the table. He leant across the table until his face was very close to yours, “It was my stupid fucked-up version of a honey trap, okay! I hated lyin’ to you, angel, and I’m so, so sorry I did that, but I was between a rock and a hard place. I had to find out what her game was. I don’t trust her an inch and I think she’s still after me an’ Frankie for somethin’ else that went down in Kandahar.”

You watched his eyes become distant, and you knew in his head he was back in that hellhole. “Seems like a helluva lot went down in Kandahar,” you said quietly, and his eyes refocused on yours. “Oh, sweetheart, you have no idea,’ he said softly, and chanced placing his hand on yours again. This time you didn’t draw away. “I don’t want you to have to hear all about that shitshow, but I’ll tell you another time… if you want me to.” He laced his fingers through yours, and squeezed your hand, “I promise you, on my life, that I’ll never lie to you again. Total honesty, I swear.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

You sighed, “Billy… I appreciate the sentiment, I do… but it doesn’t matter because we’re not together any more.” Billy rocked backwards as if you’d slapped him, and he stuttered, “But.. but we.. I… no! We are! We are still together!” You shook your head, “Maybe you don’t think that what you did with - what was her name again, Madani?” (you absolutely knew what her name was) “yeah, Madani - was cheating but Billy, you kissed her, you got up close and personal with her. You let her think you were interested in her, that she had a shot of getting with you. Okay you say you didn’t sleep with her, maybe you didn’t - but you still went behind my back and acted like you wanted to be with her. How can you expect me to be with you after you betrayed me like that? I don’t share, Billy - even if it’s fake.”

His eyes were wide, filling with tears. “No…please. Don’t say that, please. I… I can’t be without you, you’re the only one who makes me feel safe and… loved.” He placed his other hand on top of your joined hands, and his voice was so low you almost couldn’t hear it, “I love you, angel. So much.”

Now it was your turn to sit back abruptly in your seat. You and Billy had never had that conversation. You loved him but you’d made sure never to tell him that, as you didn’t believe he’d ever reciprocate the feeling. And now he’d said it. First. Before you had.

But did he mean it? Or just saying it to try and stop you breaking up with him?

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

He saw her taking in what he’d just said. He’d known that he loved her for some time but couldn’t get the words past his lips, he’d been shit-scared to say it out loud. Just let the status quo prevail, until she’d left him.

He was not going to let her break up with him. He just wouldn’t allow it, he needed her. She still had not said anything so he laid a finger on her bottom lip and gently ran it back and forward. He sensed he needed to say something more.

“I’m not just sayin’ it for effect, angel. I’ve been in love with you for a while but I’ve been too scared to say anything, I… I wasn’t sure you felt the same way.” She was still gazing at him, her eyes wide and looking a little teary. He felt a tear running down his own cheek and wiped it away abruptly. “Please don’t break up with me, just…. don’t, please. Give me another chance, I promise I won’t screw up this time.”

He heard her draw in a big breath and his stomach knotted. What was she going to say?

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

“Oh Billy….” you raised a hand and wiped away another tear from his cheek, “I… need a little time to take all this in, okay? I thought it was quite straightforward - you’d cheated on me, end of story. And don’t think that because you tell me you love me I’m gonna forget about what you did, because I can’t. Not just like that.” You snapped your fingers in the air. “But you’ve really muddied the waters for me now.”

Billy grinned tearfully at you, “Well, I’m glad I’ve managed to do that at the very least. Means I might still have a chance.” You must’ve looked sceptical or something because he rushed to say, “A very slim chance, I know.”

Sighing, you extricated your hands from his and picked up your fork. “Let’s finish our dinner before it gets totally cold and inedible and we can talk more later.”

He nodded, “Okay, sweetheart. Must admit, I’m starvin’.” You couldn’t stop yourself smiling at him, “When they say that an army marches on its stomach, they weren’t kidding, were they?” “Hell no they weren’t,” he grinned back at you.

You moved on to small talk and once dinner was finished and paid for a short while later, the two of you strolled back to the hotel. Billy had tucked your hand into the crook of his elbow, and you’d let him. Your brain wasn’t really functioning at normal speed at that point and you were looking forward to getting back to your room; you wanted to think very carefully about what you were going to do about Billy.

Back at the hotel, you made your way past Reception and headed for the stairs, Billy following close behind you. Reaching your door, you didn’t unlock it but turned to face him. You could see the hopeful look on his face but he was going to be disappointed. You weren’t going to take that step tonight, no matter how much you missed Billy, his arms around you, his body next to yours, legs tangled together. You gave him a small smile, and you saw the hope fading out of his eyes.

You put a hand on his arm, “Let’s spend some time together tomorrow. I want to visit the Lagoon islands.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

The Lagoon islands? He had no idea what or where those were, but he’d go to the moon if she wanted to because she’d said they could spend some time together. “So, no more running out on me, angel?” She smiled more widely at him, “No, not for now, Billy.”

He took a chance and pulled her into his arms, his mouth finding hers in a heated kiss. She didn’t stop him, so one hand made its way to the back of her neck and the other down onto her waist. He pushed his hips into hers - he knew she felt his arousal - and he was still holding out a tiny bit of hope that she’d invite him into her bed.

But now she did pull away, laughing up at him and giving him a quick soft kiss on the cheek, “G’night, Billy, sleep well.” He shook his head, smiling back at her, “You know I won’t… not in this state,” gesturing at his zip area and the tightened fabric of his jeans. She waggled her right hand at him, “Isn’t that what this is for?” He grabbed it, guiding it immediately to his zip, “If you’re offerin’, sweetheart, I’d be more than happy to take you up on that.” “Your hand! Not mine, you cheeky devil!” she laughed, pulling her hand away from him, “Now, goodnight! I’ll see you in the morning, downstairs for breakfast at about 8 or half past, okay?” He nodded, pushing his luck again and stroking her cheek, kissing her once more but more reserved this time, “G’night, angel, have sweet dreams…of me.” Rolling her eyes, she unlocked her door and disappeared into her room.

Billy walked jauntily along the corridor, throwing in a couple of dance moves as he went, feeling elated. He was feeling really optimistic for the first time since the day he’d seen her ‘Goodbye’ note and the torn photo.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

(My photos - June 2012)

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

@blackbirddaredevil23 @omgrachwrites @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @ourloveisforthelovely @swthxrry @odetostep @supernaturalcat7 @obscurilicious @strawb3rrydr3ss @bruxa0007 @aleksanderwh0r3 @theshadowkingsqueen @bat-luna-cat @carlywhomever

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

[rogue-durin-16]

THINGS NEVER GO AS PLANNED (Part VI/VII)

"the downfall"

Summary: After Fred's death, George and Y/n lean on each other to carry on. This wasn't the most brilliant idea, though; George was pretty much in love with the girl, and Y/n— well, she had been dating Fred prior to the Battle of Hogwarts.

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader

Genre: angst mostly

Tags:

Suggested by: @crispykittywitch

Things never go as planned: @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @beautyschoo1dropout @s1ut4georgeweasley @sunshineandshadows @missmulti @accioweaslcy @andreaareynoso @georgeweasley16 @dianarte @skarlettmikaelson

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality

Warnings: language, allusions to sex

A/N: my apologies for keeping y'all waiting for this one darlings, but here comes the next part YAYY! Enjoy <3

Prologue: the aftermath

Part I: sleepless nights

Part II: candy floss

Part III: shock therapy

Part IV: wrong name

Part V: the perfect excuse

Part VII: apart

Epilogue: I still love you

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

He had left me in the room that morning, alone, with regret and guilt straining my chest, with embarrassment and panic heaving over me, my only company being a terrible headache and a sore body.

I was still waiting for him to come back. Of course, he still lived in the apartment, but the day after, he slept at Shell Cottage because Bill needed help with the chores, and the next night at the Burrow because Molly had asked to keep an eye on 'the kids' —the kids being Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione— while she and Arthur were off to visit Andromeda, and at Lee's because Angelina was away and they were going to have a boys' weekend; in summary, he managed to avoid stepping into the flat while I was in there for an entire week.

I would be lying if I said the idea of moving out hadn't crossed my mind, but I knew I was being dramatic— we were being dramatic; we were adults, even if we forgot about it more often than not, and adults talk things out, so I decided to confront him at the only place I would manage to corner him; the shop.

When I descended from the office on the second floor, I spotted the ginger turning the 'CLOSED' to face the glass door. "Oi!" His head snapped to me as I climbed downstairs and he instantly walked to the shelves on the opposite side. "Can I have a word?" I requested, following him, only for George to move on to another shelf.

"Right now I'm quite busy." He replied, seemingly absent-minded as he pretended to check the products in front of him.

"This is important." I insisted, moving to stand besides him.

Not fast enough, though, because he was off to yet another part of the shop as soon as I got close. "I'm sure it can wait."

"You know it can't," I assured intently, stalking after him, only for him to speed up his own pace, moving from product to product without stopping too long in front of him. "George I'm- Oi, stop! We need to talk about this!"

"Well maybe I don't wanna talk about this!" He exclaimed, taking big steps under one of the stairs in order to shamelessly dodge the hand with which I had reached out to stop him.

"George Weasley don't run away from me!"

"I'm not running away from you!"

"You're literally RUNNING AWAY!"

He stopped circling the counter and stood across from me, slamming his palms over the till. "ALRIGHT, LOVE!" for the first time, I didn't like the way the name dripped off his tongue. "Let's talk about how we accidentally FUCKED! That's what you want so badly, isn't it?!" Flush crept up his neck and ears, and I couldn't tell if it was from anger or from timidness. "Go on, darling, lead the bloody way!"

I felt my own cheeks going red, partly because of his straightforward statement but also because I genuinely had never heard George raise his voice like he had just done.

"Cat's got your tongue now?!" My stuttering seemed to fuel his anger more. "C'mon, Y/n, talk! You wanted to talk!"

"SHUT THE HELL UP, GEORGE!" He clenched his jaw as his freckles drowned in a sea of pinkish red. "Yeah I want to talk! 'Cause that's what grown-ups do! We don't know how to act around each other so we just don't spend time together anymore— Fuck, I've barely seen you! AND WE. LIVE. TOGETHER!" I emphasised each word with stomps. "We can either pretend it didn't happen or talk it out to make sure we're on the same page, you choose but for Merlin's sake, don't avoid me!"

"OKAY!" His eyes widened, surprised at his own tone, and then he repeated in a softer, self-conscious one, "Okay." He breathed deeply and then added. "We're on the same page, right?" His eyebrows raised as he looked into my eyes. "It was... A mistake."

I should have noticed the uncertainty and hope in his voice, but I panicked and was too quick to respond, "Yeah! A massive mistake." My words stung my heart and, to my dismay, his own just as much. "Can we go back to being friends? Because I'm going crazy without you." I blamed our watery eyes to the argument we had had, and not to the fact that it had been a mistake.

He circled the counter and walked to me, hesitating before pulling me into a hug. "Can I...?" I tugged him closer, wrapping my arms around his middle. It took a moment for him to ease into my embrace, and I could tell we had fucked up our friendship for good. "It's alright, we'll make it right again." His words made me squeeze him tighter, as if he was about to vanish from my side.

And from then, we tried to make it right, we tried so hard, because it seemed so easy to make it wrong again.

Everytime we stood too close, everytime he leaned on to whisper something, everytime I helped him with his tie, our eyes would fall on each other's lips; I would sometimes drift off the conversation, staring too much at his mouth and hands, wandering if they would feel just as amazing as they had done while we were drunk.

"Y/n are you listening?"

"Uh yeah- I mean, no- sorry, what?"

I was so focused on trying to hide it that I didn't notice George was in the exact same situation, meaning that neither of us could give in, because we would go down together. In all honesty, it was doomed to happen at some point, we were just delaying the inevitable.

The moment came the last night of January, when George showed up in my room due to a really rough nightmare, and I, as always, invited him in so we could lay down together.

"Isn't this... Weird?" He murmured as we scooted closer. We had kept physical contact at bay for obvious reasons, and cuddling had been off the table since New Year.

"It doesn't have to be." I replied, my voice as quiet as his. "We've done this a thousand times."

"Right." He cleared his throat, averting his eyes from mines as we shifted in our places ever so slightly, trying to find a position where the situation turned less awkward.

And it happened, my mind got lost on the way his neck tensed, on the damp locks hanging over his forehead, sweaty due to the nightmare; on his plump lips, which he had just wetted with his tongue in the most subtle way. It was a nervous habit of him, something he would usually do, but that didn't make it any less hot.

"George..." I called his name without noticing, my heart hammering violently against my chest when his gaze landed on my eyes, quickly falling on my lips.

The next thing I knew was that he was holding my thigh over his hip, his other hand on the back of my neck while we shared a hungry kiss that, as soon as my hips involuntarily rocked against his, turned into something more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

The next morning we swore to each other that it was just another accident, that it would happen again.

And the next one too.

And the following.

The fifth time that happened, we agreed to call the situation a 'friends with benefits' kind of thing, well aware that it was an euphemism for the downfall of our friendship.

I had longed to be hers for so long, and it that moment, as I lay by her side in her bed, that wish seemed so close yet so far; I could reach out and my fingertips would touch her skin, yet I had never felt that distant towards her.

The moment my eyes were averted from her form, her gaze was laid on me. "You don't have to go."

"I know." I replied in a mumble, already sitting up and reaching for my pants. "But soon we'll have to get up, so I might as well do that and let you sleep." I didn't want to turn around, I didn't want to see her beautiful irises pleading for me to stay by her side, because I knew I would.

I saw on my peripheral vision her fingers attempting to carefully wrap around my wrist, and I was quick to stand up and walk to the door; sadly, I did not miss Y/n burying her face into the pillow, her hands fisting on the fabric ever so subtly.

She tried to hide her tears like that, and I agressively wiped mines as soon as I reached the corridor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Morning, lady!" I light-heartedly greeted Y/n without turning my back to the making of our breakfast when I heard the steps approaching the kitchen.

In the morning it was easier to pretend everything was back to normal; usually, the refreshing sunlight and the drowsiness provided by a night of sleep were enough to wash away the sad truth of our relationship.

"Good morning, sir." She responded with a yawn, rubbing her eyes as she walked to stand besides me, leaning against the counter with her arms folded. "Smells good." She commented, leaning on to take a peek at the scrambled eggs.

I was about to make a cocky, playful comment when it dawned on me what she was wearing; it was my jumper, one of the old ones that I exclusively used for pyjamas.

I knew she didn't do it intently; I had left it on the floor the previous night, and it was probably the first thing she grabbed, but it struck a nerve.

I had seen a similar scene way too many times before; a sleepy, dishevelled Y/n entering the kitchen with an ugly Weasley jumper as only clothing, ready to start the bickering with an almost identical version of me who would be making breakfast.

My head then travelled to the thought that lately crossed my mind more often than not and my heart clenched; In Y/n's eyes, I was, most likely, just a poor replacement for Fred.

"You alright?" That worried furrow appeared between her brows too often lately. We were both walking on eggshells, and it got me on my nerves.

"You don't have to ask if I'm alright every time I'm quiet." I hadn't meant it to come out harsh or curt, but it definitely did.

"You're not quiet, you're overthinking." She responded with a tinge of hostility.

"What's to overthink?" I fought the need to raise my voice.

"Dunno, you tell me." She squinted her eyes with a scrutinising gaze directed to me.

"Can we not do this?" I almost pleaded; heated arguments had become a usual thing between us —yet another sign of the unfixable problem we refused to address.

Y/n was about to reply something that would lead us into a fight when the doorbell rung. "Mister Weasley?" I took that as a cue to go open the door to Verity, already dressed on her uniform. "The Valentine's Day products arrived, should I unpack them or..." Her eyes flickered behind me and her cheeks heated up. "Y/n—" When I looked over my shoulder, I felt my own face flushing out of embarrassment. Y/n was still my employee and Fred's ex, so Verity catching a glimpse of her dressed in my jumper wasn't the best thing for any of us. "I— am I— sorry, am I interrupting?"

"You're not interrupting." I assured her with a reassuring smile. "Leave the boxes on the puking pastries section, we'll be down in ten."

"Alright, sir." Her curious gaze travelled to Y/n one last time, and with that, she was rushing back down to the shop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

READER'S P. O. V.

The ache that had appeared on my chest the day after New Year would end up killing me, or at least it felt like that.

I had a dreadful gut feeling of knowing what caused that pain, but my mind refused to believe it was that, and kept pushing the sensation back into my heart day by day.

George had gone to relocate the puking pastries in the upper level of the shop so I could prepare the section with the Valentine's Day products.

My eyes dawned on the small packages of Amortentia. I knew it was a terrible idea but I needed to know.

I took a look around, making sure Verity wasn't near and George was up still, and brought one of the Amortentias under my nose. It didn't take long for the scents to besot me, and I had to put all my will on not to fall under the potion's spell.

The first smell to reach my nostrils was gunpowder; my heart skipped a bit when the next scent was vanilla.

Then strawberry and chocolate; candy floss cupcakes and George's cologne.

The tiny, heart-shaped bottle fell from my hands, scattering all over the shop's floor. "Shit!" I rapidly kneeled to pick the shattered glass when I realized it had echoed in the empty establishment.

"Oi! What was that?" George descended from the second floor, using the ladder. "Oh shit—" his hands took a hold on my bicep and pulled me away from the pool of pinkish pearl liquid that seemed to be attracting me. "Don't!" He warned Verity, who had attempted to jog in the potion's direction too. "Verity, can you bring me my wand?" The girl complied running up to the office.

In Verity's absence, George took the chance and cupped my cheeks, tilting my head up to check my eyes. "You alright?" I managed to give him a slow nod, my mind buzzing with the newly acquired information. "Getting the Amortentias was a bad idea, wasn't it?" I nodded again, producing a frown between his eyebrows. "No 'told you so'? Are you sure you're alright?" He chuckled nervously, his hands falling to his sides right in time for Verity to rush back to us.

"Here, Mister Weasley!"

"Thank you, darling." He politely replied, taking the wand and restoring the potion bottle in a swift movement. His eyes peeked at me again; I could see the worry growing on him. "Y/n-"

"I'm gonna go wash my face." The words hastily left my mouth before I dashed off to the restroom.

I closed the door behind me and took a look at the mirror; my pupils were blown and my cheeks pink. I ran the tab and splashed the water on my face a few times until the potion's mild effect was gone and my mind clear.

It was in that moment that it dawned on me that I was in love with George Weasley.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed - Episode 02

Warning: Spoilers for all 50 episodes!

(Masterpost ) (Previous Episode) (Next Episode)

Donkey Riding

way ho and away we go, donkey riding donkey riding way ho and away we go, riding on a donkey

Wei Wuxian and Apple are doing their best for the Ministry of Culture and Tourism. 

Xiao Zhan had trouble riding the donkey sitting side-saddle, so the Department of Questionable Practical Effects made him a fake leg to wear while riding regular style. 

Can you spot it? It’s very hard to spot. It is very convincing.

Simple Pleasures

Wei Wuxian takes his time wandering up the nearest mountain, and half of the cultivators in the land also wander up this mountain because...Night Hunting! The cultivators are hot and thirsty from walking because they forgot that they all know how to fly. 

Wei Wuxian relaxes by a well and listens to people stanning him. 

Also

I’m going to say it: Wei Wuxian never met a drinking vessel he couldn’t blow.

Everything is Beautiful at the Ballet

The actress who plays A-Yan is named Zhang Linran. She probably has studied dance since she was 4 and now she gets her big break which turns out to be feeding an apple to a donkey. So let’s pause for a second to look at how beautifully she moves.  

Reunions are Awkward, Part 1

Wei Wuxian meets up with one of his family members and it goes super well. 

I...like Jin Ling? He’s much less of a douchebag than his dad, his uncles Jin, Jiang, and Mo (the three stooges), and every damn one of his Jin cousins. He’s genuinely brave (his Dad’s primary good quality) and his hair is on fleek. He’s still a whiny diaper baby, but I like him. 

(much more after the cut!)

Then Jiang Cheng shows up, looking fine as hell and radiating peak arrogant-prick energy.

When he discovers that ‘Mo Xuanyu” stuck a piece of paper to Jin Ling, he tells the child to literally murder him. Excellent uncleing! A+++++ would recommend.  

“In fact, literally murder anyone who uses Yiling Laozu’s tools, like talismans, lure flags, or spirit compasses - basically murder everyone in the Lan Clan plus those other fanboys we saw coming up the hill. Then get out there and make some friends, goddamn it!”

These nets full of cultivators on this daytime night hunt are the only time we ever see anything in a net during a night hunt.  In fact dudes constantly go night hunting and the only prey we ever see is rock lady, murder turtle, and a couple of rag mops in the lake. 

You Are Not Qualified to Speak to Me

Also radiating arrogant-prick energy on this occasion is Lan Wangji. He has been using pettiness as a weapon since long before he met this Jiang Cheng turkey, and he *brings it* when Jiang Cheng tries to have a conversation with him.

Letting your eyes wander everywhere except to his punchable face while you ignore his passive-aggressive questions? Quality work. 

Dropping a silence spell on his child and then letting your own child explain it to him? Golden. 

Lan Wangji is never ever going to forgive Jiang Cheng for what he did on cliff day, and his silence here is as pointed as an ice pick. I suspect the last words Lan Wangji actually spoke to him were “Jiang Wanyin, stop it,” sixteen years ago. 

Jiang Cheng is actually the bigger person in this particular interaction, visibly mastering his temper and telling Jin Ling to take his medicine. 

Reflecting

Wei Wuxian hangs out by a beautiful river and hallucinates for a while. River Jiang Yanli is nurturing and River Jiang Cheng is pissed off, so there are no surprises there.  River Jiang Cheng thinks that Wei Wuxian is a promise-breaking douchebag. He’s not exactly wrong. 

Courtesy of convenient gossiping cultivators, Wei Wuxian discovers that the 16 year old arrogant kid from the Jin clan who his brother from the Jiang clan has custody of is actually and quite obviously Jin Rulan.

Well fuck I guess now I care about something, that’s inconvenient. 

Needing to help parent the child of the sister who parented him is what draws Wei Wuxian fully into his new life. 

As soon as he has this realization, Apple comes back from roaming around, and never gives him any trouble after this for the rest of the story. Which...probably doesn’t mean anything. 

Wen Gravesite

Does Wen Ning hang out here because it’s where he and his (dead) people came from? Oh great, now I am sad. 

Judging by all the leaves on this grave thingy I’m going to say that this grave tender dude is, ah, not very good at his job. 

Get him, Jingyi!

I feel like maybe we all focus too much on how Lan Jingyi is so hilarious and sardonic and not enough on how he is a such a biscuit. 

Soul Grass

As mentioned in the previous post, Chinese spiritual concepts don’t always translate well into English. Soul grass? Sure, why not. 

This is where Wei Wuxian’s Sherlock Holmes brain starts to work, although he still doesn’t remember really basic stuff about Dafan Mountain. Dying and changing bodies is rough on the old neurochemistry. This creates more opportunities for flashbacks, however, and if there’s one thing The Untamed deffo needs more of, it’s kissing flashbacks.

Temple Statue

Presumably grave-tender dude is also in charge of clearing away spiderwebs at the temple, because it’s not getting done. 

Jin Ling walks into the temple blaspheming at full volume. 

Since this isn’t a Greek story, he isn’t immediately struck blind for this. Then when he wishes for the statue to come alive, it obligingly does.  Everything’s coming up Rulan!

Wei Wuxian shows up to rescue all the kids by throwing talismans at the monster which does not tip anyone off to who he is. 

Baby Cultivator Babysitting

Lan Wangji chills out in the cultivators’ pavilion with Jiang Cheng and their mutual hate boners.

Meanwhile, Wei Wuxian forgets all about his nephew and turns into cool professor guy, explaining the basics of soul-eating to the baby cultivators and gleefully encouraging their fear of Hanguang-Jun’s punishments. 

Because the Lan babies are good filial children they are super respectful and engaged with this random adult who is lecturing them. They also - like their own Hanguang-Jun at their age - see and admire Wei Wuxian’s intellect. It’s easy to forget how extremely smart Wei Wuxian is, because of how extremely dumb Wei Wuxian is.

Lan Jingyi suddenly figures out Wei Wuxian is not crazy. 

Bis. Kit. 

Then Rock Lady shows up and Jin Ling sticks 6 arrows into her while Lans Jingyi and Sizhui stand around not bothering to draw their swords.

I see a lot of comments about the bad effects in the statue sequences but I think Rock Lady is all right. The figure animation is decent and the lighting is no worse on her than on everything else in the scene. Her hair is nice, for a rock person.

Admittedly I just finished watching Guardian which has CGI monsters so bad they may have injured my retinas and possibly also my DNA, so the bar, for me, is pretty low. Rock lady clears it with room to spare.   

Note: Wei Wuxian’s flute playing does zippity towards controlling the statue. Not sure what his plan was here.

Wen Ning Kicks Ass

Now we get to meet Wen Ning, who appears to be a stone-cold badass. Later we will discover how hilariously inaccurate that assessment is. 

While all versions of Wen Ning are delightful, this version of Wen Ning is also...strangely attractive? He’s got a Patti-Smith-Horses-Era vibe here, instead of his more usual lost-baby-dork vibe. And his dreamy “I have nails in my head” expression is intriguing. 

I mean, he’s not a total snack like zombie Song Lan or pre-zombie Song Lan or blind Song Lan or post-zombie Song Lan, but this look is a good one for Wen Ning, is what I’m saying.

Reunions are Awkward, Part 2

Lan Wangji, who has 99% already recognized Wei Wuxian because of the haunted sword and the fierce jawline and beautiful neck and tiny tiny waist, is summoned by his flute playing as inexorably as the Ghost General was. 

Jiang Cheng also recognizes Wei Wuxian and goes into full beatdown mode, thwarted (silently) by Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian attempts to preserve his incognito by sassing Jiang Cheng in as sibling-like a manner as possible. 

Hanguang-Jun’s Pro-Ghost Agenda Has Been Clear for Some Time

This Jiang/Lan fight is hilarious when you consider the implications.

Macroexpression vs. Microexpression

Mo Xuanyu brought Wei Wuxian back using sacrifice summons, a dark ritual invented by Wei Wuxian that he, most likely, did NOT show to Lan Wangji back in the day. So it’s a pretty safe bet that Lan Wangji doesn’t know that Wei Wuxian was gifted a body, rather than stealing one.

when your brother turns around, you must whip him you will never live it down unless you whip him

When Jiang Cheng lets loose with Zidian, it’s not just because he’s angry. He’s using purple power to force Wei Wuxian’s ghost out of the body he’s apparently possessed. And Lan Wangji instantly STOPS him from doing that.

Clan Leader Jiang: this person has been possessed, against their will, by an evil ghost

Future Chief Cultivator Lan: Counterpoint: I am banging the ghost

Flashback Time

Welcome to your 30-episode flashback!

Once I used to join in Every boy and girl was my friend Now there's revolution, but they don't know What they're fighting

Let us close our eyes Outside their lives go on much faster Oh, we won't give in We'll keep living in the past

Road Tripping to Summer School

Gosh I’m looking forward to younger, kinder, more relatable Jiang Cheng.

...prick. 

Incidentally, until now this episode didn’t know that Jiang Cheng has smile muscles, and neither did the person who glued his wig on for him.

I Like Rabbits

Here we have our first rabbit in a large collection of rabbit iconography that appears in The Untamed. 

Instead of sending everyone to the Wikipedia page for Tu'er Shen I’m going to take this opportunity to rec the short film Kiss of the Rabbit God by Andrew Thomas Huang (tw: blood, tw:body-mod cutting) which you can read about and watch over at  Nowness.com 

Particularly if you are a queer person of Chinese heritage, check it out. 

So. What the fuck are these? Are they food? 

Are they made from wax? Or corn starch? or pig intestines? 

Wei Wuxian runs off to get laid drunk and Jiang Cheng grumps about it. Jiang Yanli reminds him that being free is a Jiang Clan Rule, so really Wei Wuxian is following the rules by not following the rules. Does that mean he’s not free? My head hurts. 

Jiang Cheng: yes but grump grump grump

Jiang Yanli: Nothing bad will ever happen because of A-Xian’s choices, trust me

Outro

Wei Wuxian faint tally: one  Caught by: the cold hard ground

Soundtrack: 1. Donkey Riding by Great Big Sea 2. Living in the Past by Jethro Tull 3. Whip It by Devo

Fic prompt:  Lan Wangji’s internal monologue while he sits in the pavilion with Jiang Cheng 

If you write a fic from this prompt and want to share, please post a link in comments!

Bonus: Wang Zuocheng, macro-expression king

Episode 03 Restless Rewatch coming soon!

[watermelonlipstick]

Dreams, Chapter 7

If you haven’t read this series before, you might want to start on Chapter 1, or check out the Dreams Masterlist! Here’s the series description:

When Dean dies for good leaving Sam and his girlfriend (the reader) behind, they must figure out how to carry on without him. Alone, reeling, and unsure what to do next, trying to honor Dean’s memory and follow their hearts gets even more complicated when their nightmares become dreams that feel a little too real.

Title: Dreams, Chapter 7

Pairing: (past) Dean Winchester x Reader, (eventual) Sam Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 4184

Summary: Life moves toward normalcy for Sam and the reader, regardless of emotional turmoil.

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, s l o w  b u r n

          A few days later the Kaisers came into the bar for a nightcap and asked you and Sam to come to their house for dinner. You couldn’t think of a reason not to, and honestly thought maybe it would be nice to have something to structure the week around. It had been quiet, just barely beneath solemn while the dust settled and Sam stayed mostly silent while you moved around each other throughout the day. At least at the Kaisers’ Sam would have to talk to you, maybe even sidle up close to you during waking hours to keep up the couples’ charade. A little zap of guilt moved through you as you politely agreed to a time, that the second thought you’d had was about getting closer to Sam under this guise. In any case, the Kaisers were kind, it wouldn’t hurt to have a nice meal with someone else, and if you were going to stay here, it would be a good idea to avoid appearing standoffish. You bought their last drink and were waving after them when Sam came upstairs from changing a keg.

           “We’re going to the Kaisers’ for dinner tomorrow,” you offered, trying to keep your voice even and making a point of not staring at Sam too long. It was a challenge; since Sam had kissed you and even more since he’d divulged that longing was part of the tangle of emotions he was feeling, it was on your mind nearly constantly, adding a murky stripe to the ever-present grief.

           “Oh, uh, okay.” Sam jammed his hands into the pockets of his jeans like he didn’t know what to do with them. “What time?”

           “They said 7:30. Don’t let me forget; I think we should bring a bottle of wine or something, so I can grab one tomorrow.”

           “Yeah, that works.”

           You wanted to drag out the conversation but couldn’t think of any way to that wasn’t cloying or desperate. If this (hopefully temporary) emotional distance was what Sam needed, it was unfair for you to try to take it from him. A quick nod and you returned to washing glasses.

           The rest of the shift passed agonizingly slowly. Sam put on a podcast about Jonestown for the drive home.

           You’d decided to walk over to the Kaisers’ with Sam the next day, bundled up on top of a presentable sweater that you hadn’t worn in a few years. Biting wind sliced through your jeans and seemed to creep into your coat even as you dug your chin inside the collar like a turtle, and when Sam noticed he threw an arm around you. His side blocked a bit of the wind and he rubbed your shoulder to warm it with friction. The impulse to curl up into his ribs was fierce, but you fought it down to wrap your forearms around the bottle of red wine that looked the fanciest of the midrange bottles at the grocery store. Where seconds before you had been wishing the walk were shorter, now you could’ve stayed out in the ice forever if it meant Sam would allow himself to be close to you again without being asleep. You’d made peace with the want, trying hard to decide that feeling crazy on top of your grief wasn’t helping anyone.

           “Ready?” Sam asked with a tentative smile at the doorway. The Kaisers lived in a version of your cabin, in the sense that many of the houses in the area were log-hewn and rustic. However, they were clearly here to stay. Window flowerbeds filled with pinecones for the season and delicately carved shutters framed warm casts of light streaming onto the snow through gauzy ivory curtains, and their door opened to a tiny front porch where yours simply had a small ungraceful cement platform. For a moment, you thought about how comforting it would be to come back here at the end of a shift. It didn’t feel like somewhere as darling as this could have a half-broken boiler that rattled all day or plastic-coated countertops. This was a home and not a hideout.

           You gave Sam what you hoped was a reassuring grin and watched as his long finger pressed an old-fashioned doorbell encased in wrought iron.

           Mike answered the door. He had on a fuzzy pullover that made him look even more like a teddy bear than he normally did, nubbly wool spanning his belly like fur. He had the kind of rosy full-cheeked smile some jolly men combined with their booming voices to seem like the Ghost of Christmas Present, and a well-groomed beard with two starkly delineated streaks of gray-white dropping straight down from the corners of his mouth. From previous neighborly hugs, you knew he smelled like piney aftershave. He was a little taller than average, and built former-linebacker solid. You would’ve bet anything he was the perfect dad to call to help move you into a college apartment or scare an ex-boyfriend, and the thought of it made you cheerful and sad all at once. The hand not holding the doorknob had a pint of dark beer. “Great, you’re here! Babs, they’re here,” he added over his shoulder, gesturing an arm to welcome you into the home.

           Sam waited for you to go first, shuffling his feet along the doormat in tandem with you as Mike closed the door. You followed Mike’s socked initiative and gently toed your boots off while you handed him the bottle of wine somewhat shyly. For all the years you’d been on your own, there was something so decidedly adult about bringing wine over to the dinner party of a middle-aged couple that felt like those first few meetings of your parents’ friends after college, when you’re not sure whether to call them by their first names or resign yourself to a life of Mr This and Mrs That. Mike seemed to pick up on it, thoughtfully appraising the bottle and squeezing your shoulder, humming about how you didn’t have to bring anything. He clapped Sam on the back and asked him how he was doing before teasing gently about how long his hair had gotten, and you took in the house.

           It was bigger than the cabin you were staying in, the staircase to your left suggesting an upstairs that yours didn’t have, but what was far more striking was how warm it felt both in mood and literal temperature. A fire crackled straight through the main room in front of you, surrounded by giant river rock stonework that offset caramelly beige walls. A deep, plush canvas sofa faced the fireplace, flanked by two equally overstuffed armchairs upholstered with burnt sienna stained leather. Quick visual survey gave you a count of 4 throws in the room of various weights and patterns.

           The kitchen was over to the right through the dining room. Barbie was wearing an apron covered in piglets and appeared to be basting something in the oven, turning toward you and absentmindedly wiping her hands. Fluffy, soft-looking hair was held back from her face with a pair of no-nonsense tortoiseshell barrettes. “Oh, perfect! I thought I hadn’t left enough time for the roast, but it looks about done. Can I get you two a drink?”

           Sam’s soft, encouraging smile was enough to make you feel a little weak in the knees. “Sure! It smells great in here.”

           “How about an old fashioned? We’ve been working through a great bottle of bourbon.”

           “Works for me,” Sam agreed, and you nodded as well.

           A few moments of small talk later, Sam offered to help Barbie with the food. She graciously accepted, giving him some job you knew she could’ve easily done herself as a way to make him feel more comfortable. Mike noticed you looking at the variety of pictures on the wall and started talking about their kids, putting names to each cheerful face. They were a good-looking family, the Kaisers, all big beaming smiles and limbs protectively wrapped around each other over the course of different seasons and major events. You’d had to let go of this idea years ago, long before Dean was gone, but it still made you ache in a nondescript way to see a family so happy and so each others’, not only in the way they loved but also in the way they so obviously belonged. Mike and Barbie were good people, and they deserved this. You tried to focus on the affection in Mike’s face as he talked, asking a few clarifying questions as he went. A few moments later, Sam came up behind you.

           “Barbie says we should go sit down.” There was a pinkness to his cheeks and you couldn’t tell if it was the warmth of the kitchen or residual windburn from your walk over.

           The table was one of those single-plank, live-edged ones you’d always coveted and knew were far more expensive than they looked. It fit the elevated rustic feel of the Kaisers’ house and the delicious, rib-sticking meal you were eating off of it. As you fawned over the roast and Barbie did the requisite Midwestern dance of ‘oh it’s nothing I’ll give you the recipe’ it was easy to fantasize about belonging somewhere like this, having parents like this, pictures of your cousins and nieces and nephews lining the walls of your childhood home. Indulgent, clearly, even more so than the rich food and smooth liquor, but you couldn’t bring yourself to feel guilty about it.

           “So, have you two always worked in the bar industry? That always seemed so fun to me—but I’m too old to do anything like that now,” Barbie asked.

           “Oh, come on, you’d be a great bartender,” Sam insisted, always coming down on the exact right spot between flattering and politely flirtatious. “But uh, no. This is the first bar I’ve worked in for more than a few weeks, actually.”

           Mike raised his eyebrows in an indication to continue but Sam artfully avoided his gaze. You couldn’t tell what the cue was—how honest was Sam planning on being? An old classic, the technically-true, seemed like the best option. “I worked as a bartender through and a little bit after college.”

           “Silly me, I guess I had always thought that’s how you two had met; you seem like such a good team there! How did you meet, then?”

           You artfully popped an entire fingerling potato in your mouth to force Sam to take over. “Uh, our, ah, families were friends.” In the sense that Bobby had been like an uncle to you both, maybe. A complete non-answer that sort of encompassed the barebones of the situation if you squinted at it right, but neither Mike nor Barbie seemed to recognize the opacity of it.

           “That’s great. I bet your parents were excited then, seeing you get together,” Mike suggested before taking a sip of bourbon. Both you and Sam smiled affirmatively—not together, many of those parents long dead before we had even met—and hoped the moment would pass. “How long has it been, then? Since you got together?”

           That one you couldn’t even guess what the right pretend answer would be and prepared to joke ‘too long’ before Sam said, “About two years. We knew each other for a long time before that, though.” It made sense, as far as answers went. ‘About two years’ since Dean was gone, since your lives changed, but it still ripped through you like an electric shock and sent you reeling. You could have spent an hour looking at that statement from every angle but snapped out of it when Barbie gave you a basket of rolls to pass to Mike.

           “So that explains why she doesn’t have a ring,” Mike winked, playfully knocking Sam’s arm with his fork still in his hand. “Two years isn’t that long.”

           Two years is a lifetime. Sam blushed and looked down at his plate. “Be nice. Kids don’t get married at 20 like they used to,” Barbie teased from across the table, smirking at her husband with so much love behind her eyes. You couldn’t help but wonder if you would’ve looked at Dean like that across some dining room table if things had been different and your mind flashed on the kitchen counter a few nights before, silently clinking rocks glasses together over pie and wanting to hold Sam until the world got more fair.

           The plates were cleared and an amazing, sticky bread pudding was brought out. Mike and Barbie coaxed each other into telling stories that made you genuinely belly laugh until finally you couldn’t suppress a tiny yawn and the final drink was poured with a joke about how it wasn’t like you were driving home, so what was the harm? You all moved to the living room in front of the fire, sitting next to Sam on the couch when Mike and Barbie took what must’ve been their normal spots in each armchair. Old cushions folded up around you comfortingly and rolled you slightly into Sam’s weight next to you, lining up the firm stretch of his thigh along yours. Warmth from the fire and Sam, the pleasant sounds of your hosts’ voices and Sam’s answers to them rumbling through you as vibrations when he spoke were so sweet and heavy under the bourbon, and your eyelids began to droop.

           Sam’s hand gently covered your knee. “Ready to go?” he asked, low with a private smirk.

           You made a conscious effort to sit up straight. “I’m so sorry, I can barely keep my eyes open! Where are my manners?”

           Mike laughed a big belly laugh from his armchair. “Babs, we’re outlasting the bartenders!”

           Everyone chuckled as you all got up from your chairs, Sam accepting a Tupperware of leftovers before the at-the-doorway conversation of people who didn’t want to go and hosts who didn’t want them to either. You’d been so nervous about the dinner and now you didn’t want to leave, honestly hadn’t really wanted to leave the sofa, just doze against Sam in the heat and company like a child. It had seemed before like maybe Mike and Barbie were just asking you for dinner because it was the thing to do, but they had been genuinely welcoming and you realized that these were the first non-hunter or hunting-related relationships you had made in literal years as you zipped your coat up all the way to the top and followed Sam outside into the quiet night.

           “Man, they are really nice,” he remarked, walking closely enough next to you that your sleeves brushed together.

           You could barely see his face when you looked up to him. “Yeah. We should have them over sometime.”

           “Our place looks like a flop house.”

           You giggled, the sound falling softly on the snow around you. “We can fix it up first.”

           “No real point in fixing it up if we’re not staying here for a long time.”

           “Maybe we could stay a while.”

           Sam looked down at you, slowing to a stop even as the icy wind whipped around you. “You want to stay?”

           “I mean, I—yeah, I think I do. Unless you think we should go somewhere else.”

           “No, I just…I guess I hadn’t really considered it here, the whole “roots” thing.”

           “It’s fucking freezing, can we talk at the cabin?”

           Sam’s laugh rang out across the woodsy surroundings as he clapped an arm around you and shuffled you both home.

           That night you tucked your cold toes between Sam’s flannel-clad legs and tried to imagine Dean as an old man.

           If you’d thought December and January were bad, the intense cold snap of February sent you for a loop. Something about the months of darkness and frozen fingers was making you more stir crazy than normal; the idea of coming home to the cabin seeming less and less enticing as the days went on.

           And then the boiler broke.

           Well and truly broke, not just making the horrible clanging sounds it was prone to, but no heat at all. It had only been a couple weeks since going to dinner at the Kaisers’ and the experimental conversation with Sam about investing time into the cabin which had since fizzled out. A lack of heat at the border of the Upper Peninsula in winter was obviously untenable, and it forced the topic again as you grumpily helped carry in the remnants of another dead tree Sam had felled to heat the home with firewood.

           “Is it worth fixing or is this a sign?” you huffed through the tiny clouds of steam coming out of your mouth. “How much would it cost?”

           “I don’t have a ton of experience with boilers, but I’m pretty sure it’s the heat exchanger. And I have no idea how much it would cost to fix, but I can try to do it myself if the parts aren’t too much.” Pragmatic, genius Sam with the patience for machinery that you didn’t have. He snaked a long arm out from the bundle of wood he was carrying to open the door and hold it for you to scurry under his arm before closing it after both of you.

           Generally, you thought a landlord would probably fix this kind of thing but it always felt a little scary asking him for anything, knowing you paid cash every month and the owner had never asked for a background check. It could have been fine, but every potential conflict seemed like it might be an opportunity to be unceremoniously evicted. Better to either leave before it could happen or solve the problem yourselves. You put a hand on Sam’s chest before he could go back for another bundle of wood. “Let’s talk about it for a second.”

           Sam put his hands on his hips and it accentuated the broad span of his shoulders in his thick jacket. “Okay, right. What do you think?”

           “Well, I mean, do you want to stay here? Or do you want to go somewhere else, or start moving again or something? We haven’t even really talked about it.”

           He seemed to be weighing the options before biting his lip. “Here seems as good a place as any in a lot of ways, you know? Off the beaten path, probably not going to get spotted by anyone we know—knew—and the money is honest.”

           You cut him off with a flippant wave of the hand. “Right, but I’m not talking strategically. Do you want to stay here? Do you like it here?”

           A moment of silence fell as you searched his face for clues. “I—yeah, I do. I like being in the woods, I like the bar, I like people like the Kaisers and Steve and Jake. Maybe I’ll feel differently in the summer but right now I do.”

           The grin cracked open your face slowly. “Good. I like it here too. Do you think the hardware store would have the stuff you need to fix it?”

           “Definitely the first place I would check.”

           After getting the rest of the wood inside and leaving it next to the small fire already burning to dry out, you started to follow Sam to the car before he turned around a step before the door. “Where are you going?” he asked as you almost bumped into him.

           “Hardware store, I thought?”

           “Nice try, we can’t both leave with a fire going.”

           “Oh, I get it. So you get to go sit in the warm car and hang out in the warm hardware store while I turn into a popsicle over here.” You were half-joking, but it was genuinely freezing in the cabin, even with the fire going. Sam rolled his eyes over a smirk and strode around you, pushing the couch tight to the fireplace before retrieving the down comforter from the bed and throwing it on top. He grabbed a rinsed plastic bottle from the top of the recycling bin and filled it with water hot from the tap before throwing it in the microwave for a second.

           “Unless you feel like learning a lot about boilers today, then yes.” He gingerly pulled the bottle out of the microwave and tightened the cap back on, deftly shifting it between hands before tossing it under the comforter on the sofa.

           You were having a hard time holding onto your anger as you watched him make a cup of peppermint tea, still wearing his boots and coat as he moved around the tiny kitchen. Reluctantly, you shuffled over to the couch and removed only your boots and gloves before getting under the blankets, tucking your socked feet around the poor man’s hot water bottle and finally smiling only when Sam brought over the steaming mug of tea with more than a touch of affection under the exasperation coloring his face. “Fine?”

           “Fine.”

           When he came back, you were well into a worn paperback and had put two more logs on the fire already. “Do you need help?” you called over your shoulder from within the comforter cocoon.

           “I think I’ve got it, thanks.” His words came into the room on a gust of cold air while he tapped snow off of his boots.

           “Think you know what you’re doing?”

           “Actually, yeah. The woman at the hardware store—you’d recognize her, Diane I think—knew a fair amount about it. I’m pretty sure I have it under control.” He brought a paper bag weighted with supplies over to the utility closet you knew held the boiler and got to work.

           It was nice watching Sam in this element, always had been. As much as Dean had loved doing little projects and fixing things, both Winchesters were far handier than your average bear and Sam’s natural interest in learning lent itself well to tinkering with all kinds of things. Evidently boilers were not an exception. He shucked his coat off to lie flat on his back, looking up  at something you couldn’t see with his hands gently resting on his ribcage before reaching to grab a wrench. The twisting motion raised his elbow and tugged his shirt a bit up his torso to reveal a few inches of Sam’s lower abdomen, the trail of hair tracing to his belt buckle in slightly sharper contrast to the taught skin around it given the consecutive months spent without sun. It made you blush and you quickly looked back to your book, grateful for the heat that the fireplace was bringing to your cheeks as cover.

           About forty minutes later, Sam tapped your shoulder and startled you out of the goofy historical fiction of the paperback. “Wanna see if it works?”

           He had a stripe of oil or something on his cheek but you resisted the impulse to swipe it off, instead nodding and extricating yourself from the heat of the blanket and couch around you. When you turned it on, the boiler clicked loudly twice in a way you thought might be a bad omen before going silent again. You let an extended beat pass and placed a palm on the side. It was already on the edge of being too hot to touch and you momentarily forgot that you and Sam had decidedly not been continuing your new normal level of comforting affection lately before throwing your arms up high around his neck excitedly. He chuckled into your ear and closed the embrace, forearms crossing your ribcage and hoisting you off the ground as he stood up in your hug. You could feel the fingers of one hand splayed out over your back and side through your jacket, the other still holding the wrench tightly.

           “Okay, no promises it’s going to last, but I think that was it,” Sam offered as you released each other.

           “Crank it! I want it to feel like the Caribbean in here.”

           “You say that now, and in 3 hours you’re going to be whining about how hot you are,” Sam grinned, clearly feeling a little proud of himself even if he wouldn’t admit it. He tapped the wrench absentmindedly against his palm for a moment, considering whether he wanted to say something. “When I was at the hardware store she said our landlord might be open to cutting our rent if we offered to fix up the place.”

           “Who’s we?” you teased, holding your frozen fingers close to the boiler like it was a campfire.

           “I thought you might say that. But seriously, I know you don’t like the color of the walls or the shower pressure or whatever, could make it feel a little less…sterile.”

           You tried not to remember that the last time you’d picked out paint was for a bright pink bedroom at age 12. Sam was right, it could be nice. Even more than that, it would be great to have some leftover cash around, and an extra project to kill a few hours of daylight wasn’t a bad idea.

           “I kind of like the sound of that. I’ll talk to him about whether he’d be game.” Sam squeezed your shoulder before massaging your neck, admiring the boiler distractedly when you continued. “And seriously, thank you for fixing it.”

-

Continue to Dreams, Chapter 8

Thanks again for reading! If you liked it, check out my Masterlist or send me a request!

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[caesaryoulater]

Dangerous Woman (Oberyn Martell x F!Reader)

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Rating: This chapter is quite tame, but future chapters will be explicit.... 18+ only.

Word Count: 2.8K

A/N: This is a modern day version of Oberyn and there will be very little tie in to Game of Thrones. It focuses mainly on the character.

Summary: You aren’t excited to go to your friend’s house rager, but you have to be there for her. Things change when you spot a mysterious man who may or may not run a sex club.

Content: Brief mentions of a sex club, drinking. 

Playlist: Dangerous Woman on Spotify

Masterlist | Series Masterlist 

 You stand outside your best friend’s door, taking deep breaths in preparation for what was inside. You didn’t really want to go to a party tonight, you much preferred the idea of heading home and getting lost in some TV show you basically had memorized. But you had promised you’d at least make an appearance; plus, you were already a bit late.  She had finally bought her own home and wanted to throw a big celebration. As a friend, you had to support her with whatever crazy idea she came up with, even if it was out of left field for both of you. “You can stay an hour, you’ll be fine,” you mutter under your breath to yourself. You take one final breath and open the door, turning on your fake enthusiasm.  

“You made it!” Stephanie screams from across the room when she sees you walk in. She runs over and wraps you in a big hug.  

“Are you drunk already?” You smirk at her. She didn’t get drunk often, but when she did, she went all out. You weren’t expecting her to be this drunk this early, though.  

“We did tequila shots,” she giggles, still using her outside voice. “I’m still yelling, aren’t I?”  

You nod. “Let’s go get some snacks, it’s still early.” Without questioning anything, she starts dragging you to the kitchen. The island counter is covered in random bottles of booze and all kinds of party snacks. You grab a plate, filling it with whatever you could grab and shove it at Stephanie. “Here, eat.” You’ve always been the mom friend, choosing to cover up whatever social anxiety you had with a task by babysitting grown adults. “Who are all these people, I don’t recognize anyone.” You look around at the crowd of people, you thought you might recognize a handful of them. Even though she could be an introvert, she was definitely much more social than you.

“I invited a few friends from work, then they invited some people. I think those people invited people, who invited people... and so on.” The early drunkenness made a bit more sense now. As much as she liked meeting new people and having acquaintances, too much at one time got overwhelming. “It’s fine. I’m fine,” she notices the look you're giving her. “Seriously.”

You roll your eyes, eyeing her again before surveying the room. Your eyes stop at a man dressed in yellow surrounded by a crowd of people, all intently listening to whatever he was saying. Even without hearing him, you understood why people were hanging on his words. There was something about the way he stood, confident and charismatic. You’d never seen him before, but you had this sudden urge to get to know him. You normally weren’t the type to be stopped in your tracks by another person, but there was something about him.  He must’ve felt you staring, turning his head and catching your eye. He smirks and winks before turning back to his group. You turn back towards the island, grabbing a cup and a bottle of whiskey, pouring it into the cup. With the sudden urge to get to know this strange man came the need for liquid courage.  

Stephanie turns back towards you, having started a conversation with another partygoer while you were staring. “Alright! Now we can party!” A smirk spreads across her face as she gets a better look at you. “Why are you blushing!?”  

“I’m not,” you take a big sip of your whiskey. You look up to see the man looking over at you, still carrying on his conversation. He smirks again, his eyes almost undressing you. Normally you’d be uncomfortable, but for whatever reason, you didn’t want him to stop looking. His attention was brought back to someone in his group, you sigh.

“Who is that?!”  

“He’s in your house, Steph, you tell me...”  

“That’s Oberyn Martell,” the partygoer she had been talking to interjects.  

Stephanie tilts her head in thought. “That name sounds familiar.”

“He owns the Red Viper Room.”  

Your eyes widen. “You mean like the sex club?” The club had a reputation around town. You had heard a lot but weren’t really sure about what was true. A very loud portion of people in town weren’t happy with it, and you took what they said with a grain of salt. They were the same people that looked down on anything that didn’t fit their extremely small, vanilla worldview. It’d be a lie to say you’d never thought about what it might be like, but you never had the desire to actually go check it out. Or maybe it was a lack of courage. Either way, you didn’t look down on anyone that went. Consenting adults can do whatever they want.  

“Yep, that’s the one,” the girl answers. “You seem to have caught his eye, so let me give you a warning: steer clear. As if the whole club ownership wasn’t a clue, he’s a total womanizer.” She thought for a second, “that’s probably not the right word. I’ve heard he’ll fuck anything with a pulse. People have seen him with men too.”

You stare over at her, suddenly extremely uncomfortable with the judgement. “Is that an issue?” There was so much to unpack with what she just said. You couldn’t understand why anyone took issue with what another adult did in the confines of their own bedroom. You couldn’t tolerate anyone who took issue with who another adult found attractive. Honestly, you’d be lying if you hadn’t thought of at least one other woman that way. To you, sexuality was on a spectrum and people should allow themselves to feel whatever attraction they felt without the confines of what society told them was normal.

The girl rolls her eyes, “Don’t get all sensitive, the guy is a weirdo. If you want to get involved with someone like him, that’s your problem.”  

Stephanie glares over at her, “I think you need to leave,” she shouts a little louder than she probably intended. The girl rolls her eyes again and walks towards the door, grabbing the guy she presumably came with before walking out. “This town is full of judgmental homophobes and I’m sick of it.”  

You smirk and put your arm around her. “Maybe stick to inviting people you actually know to your next party, babe.” You run your hand up and down her arm and squeeze her into a side hug, pressing a small kiss to her head. “Go out to the balcony and get some fresh air?”

“I’m going to go to the bathroom and get some water first.”

You nod and head out to her balcony. She actually had a great view of the city in the nearby distance. She lived close enough that it wasn't inconvenient going to the city to do anything, but far enough away that she didn’t have to deal with as much of the noise and traffic. It was a really nice spot. You didn’t live too far from her, but definitely not in as nice of a neighborhood. You lean against the railing, taking in the view, enjoying the cool air. You take a sip of your whiskey and sigh. 

“Beautiful night, isn’t it?” A slightly accented voice says behind you. You turn and see the man from earlier. He stops just outside the door, noticing he’s startled you and not wanting to scare you more. This small gesture isn’t something that goes unnoticed. Most men at parties attempting to pick up a woman wouldn’t be so mindful of the woman’s comfort level.  

You turn to fully face him and take a small step forward. “Yes, it’s very beautiful.” He continues eyeing you, waiting for permission to make a move towards you. You extend your hand and introduce yourself.

He saunters over to you slowly, taking your hand in his once he reaches you and brings it up to his lip, gently kissing it. “Oberyn Martell. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” His hand lingered on yours for a few seconds longer than would typically be acceptable or comfortable. “I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable earlier. I couldn’t help but stare; you are absolutely breathtaking.”

You feel your cheeks burning. “Not at all. It wasn’t as if you didn’t catch me staring at you.”  

He smirks, appreciating the quip back and leads you back over to the edge of the balcony to enjoy the view again. His hand lightly touches the small of your back, sending shock waves you weren’t expecting though you. Part of you wished that his hand would travel lower, but once you made it to the edge, he moved it towards the railing. You had a strong urge to grab his hand and put it back on you, especially watching it fidget on the railing. “What the hell is wrong with you, get ahold of yourself” you internally will yourself to calm down. Without really thinking about it, you inch closer to him, your hand practically touching his on the railing.  

“You know, I almost didn’t come tonight, my friend convinced me. I was sure that it’d be a rather boring evening. But I’m glad I’ve been proven wrong.”

Your cheeks burn again, and you can’t help the grin that spreads across you face. “I almost skipped out too, I had some ice cream waiting for me. But I felt I had an obligation to show up. At least I’ve gotten something out of that obligation.” You peek over at him and see him smirking again. His pinkie brushes against you. You wanted to think it was on purpose and that he felt the same sparks through his body as you did.

“Do you know the host, then?”

“Yeah, she’s my best friend.” You sigh and turn to stare into the house, realizing Stephanie should probably be out here by now. “And yet, I don’t know the majority of the people here.”  

“I get the impression your friend doesn’t really either,” he turns his attention towards the house as well. You notice Stephanie talking to someone, based on her expression she had no idea who the person was, and she didn’t want to be talking to them. Her polite but uncomfortable smile said it all.

You give him a small smile and continue watching your friend, trying to think of an excuse to pull her away from her current situation. You could just pull her away, but you were afraid you’d have at least one person hanging on and following. Faking an emergency probably wasn’t a great idea. You weren’t always great at judging at how far to take it and causing a panic probably wasn’t the best idea.

“Would you like me to clear the crowd a bit?” He smirks over at you.  

“And how would you do that?” You’d never seen a party clear out early, not without the cops involved at least.

“I have my ways.” He turns and walks back into the house, approaching one of his friends you recognize from the group he was in earlier. He whispers something into the guy’s ear and the guy nods. Oberyn steps up onto the coffee table. If Stephanie were sober, she would have some words for him. He raises his voice, “Who wants to go to a real party at Starfall?” The crowd erupts in cheers. The club was basically impossible to get into unless you knew somebody. Did he own that one too, you wonder. You don’t know a single person that has ever even attempted to get in. “Alex over there will let you in free tonight only, just let him know you were here at this party.” He jumps down and you both stand back and watch the majority of the crowd file out the door. The only ones left were some of the people you recognized from Steph’s job. You stare at Oberyn. “Alex owns the club. He owes me a million favors,” he shrugs.

Stephanie comes over to join you, slightly more sober than before and definitely less stressed. “I would want to yell at you for having your feet on my new coffee table but thank you.”  

Oberyn nods. “You’re very welcome. I heard you were in over your head,” he motions to you.

Steph looks between the two of you skeptically. “And how do you know each other?”

He smirks and looks over at you. “We don’t. Yet.”

“Anyway, I think the important thing here is, Oberyn got the place cleared out, so we can have some non-stressful fun, right?” You pointedly look at her, begging her not to keep questioning him to the point of embarrassment. Sober Stephanie would have a million questions for any man attempting to hit on you, talk to you, or even be near you. Drunk Stephanie would be a lot more protective; you were sure of it.  Steph shrugs and lets it go, but the look she gave you told you it wouldn’t be let go forever.

A few moments of silence are broken up by the sound of a light buzzing. Oberyn reaches into his pocket and sighs. “I should probably go help Alex with the crowd.”  You nod, trying not to give away your disappointment. You knew the likelihood of him staying in a stranger’s home after the party died down was low, but you still wish he would.  

“Hey, Steph. You had some cheesecake in the fridge, right?” One of her coworkers, Natalie, walks over. Stephanie nods. “Come help me, we can get that ready and get a movie going.” Natalie looks back at you and winks as she leads Stephanie to the kitchen.  

Oberyn is still lingering, he’s made no real attempt to walk towards the door. You had to take advantage of what little time you had left before he disappeared. “Uh, let me walk you to your car, make sure you get out safe,” you joke knowing that you were in probably the safest area in town and that even if you weren’t, he was most likely more than capable of taking care of himself.  

He nods and lets out a small chuckle. “I was pretty afraid, thank you.” You follow him to the door and out to the driveway. You knew nothing about cars, but you could tell at least whatever it was that he drives is nice and probably cost more way more than anything you’ve ever owned in your life. “I hope this isn’t too forward, but I would like to take you out sometime. If you’re interested.”  

You notice a quick glimpse of uncertainty on his face before it shifts back to the confident look he’s had all night. “I might be interested in that,” you smirk and hold out your hand for his phone. He hands it over after unlocking it. You input your number and save it as a contact. “Text me sometime.”

He nods and leans in, kissing you on the cheek. “Enjoy your cheesecake.”

You watch as he drives off before making your way back in. As you’re opening the door, there is some shuffling and hushed voices in the background. You see Stephanie and her coworkers failing to pretend to be watching the movie on the screen. “Enjoy the show?”

“It’s a really great movie so far, I think you’ll like it.” Stephanie responds looking up at you, acting like you interrupted her enjoyment of the movie.

“It’s still on the previews, sweetie.”  

She rolls her eyes and shrugs. You knew she had no shame and didn’t really care that she had been caught. It wasn’t the first time, or the worst time, she had spied on you with a guy. You remember one date with a guy that she “just happened” to be at the same restaurant at a nearby table. To her credit, the guy ended up being a major douche and you had an out to end the date. “So, what happened?”

“I gave him my number. It doesn’t really mean anything. He might not even end up texting.” You sit down and join the group to watch the movie. They had ended up choosing some cheesy romantic comedy. Despite your best efforts, your mind keeps wandering to Oberyn. About halfway through the movie, your phone starts buzzing on the floor next to you. Before you can even check it, Stephanie’s chin is resting on your shoulder, trying to get a peek.

“Is it him?”

You teasingly push her away. “I’ll let you know.”

You open your phone and see a new text. “It was great meeting you tonight. Coffee tomorrow? Oberyn.” Stephanie smirks noticing how flustered you look. You notice all eyes on you, waiting for an update. You sigh and try not to laugh. “I think I have a date tomorrow.”

[cl-01-kestis]

The Proposition

Dismay - Grand Admiral Thrawn x Rebel!Reader | Part 10

Summary: You seem to be growing closer to Thrawn with each day that goes by as you’re kept prisoner on Lothal, and after spending a late night with him, you receive an interesting invitation.

Warnings: this is a pretty long chapter, alcohol consumption

Cheunh Translations:

Nah = No

Mar = Yes

It was day 4 of being Thrawn’s ‘guest’. You’d grown accustomed to the monotone colours and lack of untidiness in the chamber you were cooped up in. Your holodevice had been repaired, you got it back last night and left it on your nightstand so you could use it in the morning when Thrawn woke up and went to do his job as Grand Admiral.

The feeling of waking up beside Thrawn every morning was something you had adjusted to very quickly whilst being held by the Empire. Neither of you would be touching, you’d be in your own sides of the bed, but your bodies would still be fairly close. He held you whenever you had a nightmare, or couldn’t get to sleep (mostly any chance he got to).

Today was Benuday, you knew because you were trying your best to keep track of the days that went by and the limited time you had left with Thrawn before the rebels made an attempt to rescue you. This morning, he made you breakfast but unfortunately didn’t have time to wake you up due to how busy his schedule was for today, so you woke up alone and in a cold bed. But hey, you got breakfast.

Thrawn wasn’t in his chambers when you showered and done your usual routine of walking around aimlessly and scrolling through your data pad. He left you a note in Cheunh saying that he was requested at the cock pit and wouldn’t be back for a while, so you had no other choice but to lounge about.

You thought a lot about how much you missed your daughter, and as well as Kallus and all the other rebels back on Yavin. It hadn’t even been a week and you hated it, you hated the Empire. But Thrawn’s company was the only medication to distract you from all the negativity you were experiencing. He comforted you when you were feeling upset, laughed with you at corny jokes, uttered a smile whenever you done literally anything, stole glances from you every chance he got, and treated you as an equal rather than someone below him.

The only thing that brought you peace at this moment in time was the fact that Thrawn hadn’t changed one bit. The only difference was his ageing appearance and wiser-sounding vocabulary. Aside from those things, he was the same boy deep inside you always knew and grew up to love. Now that was comforting.

As well as spending time with each other whenever he didn’t need to work and catching up on the 14 years the two of you were apart, you truthfully opened up to Thrawn about Omani. You told him her interests, stories you remembered of her whe she was a baby, the things she hated, what she wanted to be when she became an adult, and all the small details Thrawn had missed out on for so long. In a sense, you felt like you robbed him from fatherhood, he was so fond of having a family, only to miss out on his daughters entire childhood. It felt wrong.

He didn’t seem to show any signs of anger or disappointment towards that, but then again, he was excellent at hiding things, especially his emotions. Either way, he was infatuated by your stories of Omani’s birth, the things you went through during labour, all the hardships and trauma, but she was a healthy baby girl. When you told him that, his eyes sparkled. You could tell he already truly loved her, and he hadn’t even meet her yet. You hoped he would get the chance one of these days.

The little squeaky gurgles of a 6 month old Omani blasted out of the speaker of your holodevice as it projected a video you had kept for years, one of many that logged videos and photos of Omani’s growth and all the things she was up to throughout her childhood. In the video you were watching, you, looking much younger, had her perked up on your hip and swayed about as a song echoed in the background. You looked at the camera which was set down on a table in the cantina on the rebel base at Yavin 4, bouncing her on your hip and holding one of her tiny blue hands, her fingers wrapping around one of yours, proving how small she really was.

Ahsoka was in the background, not in the video much but you spotted her laughing and encouraging Omani to dance as she wriggled in your arms. At this time, she would’ve been talking by now. No other words apart from ‘Mama’, ‘Nah’ and ‘Mar’. But she laughed a lot in the videos, her cheeks bright and her face glowing as she looked up at you and tried to grab your hair with her small hands.

Thrawn sat beside you in his bed, his shift was finally over and he joined you in watching the videos on your holodevice. So far, he was absolutely loving it. His smile outshone everything in the room as he watched a younger version of yourself dance with your, then, 6 month old daughter. His smile seemed to widen every time you or Omani laughed, and whenever you took her hand and waved it at the camera.

The two of you watched a few videos of Omani’s childhood, heartfelt laughter and stolen glances rippled between you and Thrawn as you watched each video with a sense of comfort. There was currently one of Omani as a 7 year old, holding your device and walking around your apartment with a big smile on her face. You remembered this video well, it was for your 35th birthday and she surprised you that day by waking you up with a surprise. Her small giggles echoed from the speaker as she started jumping on your bed, and in a flash she was tackled to the mattress and you were blowing raspberry’s on her neck and cheeks, your hands tickling her sides which caused her to drop the camera at a perfect angle where the both of you were seen toppling over the bed and into the floor, you taking the impact of the landing and making sure she didn’t get hurt as you cradled her in your chest.

“You’re truly protective over her” Thrawn comments with a light tone, leaning on his elbow as he relaxed on his covers. He was still wearing his Admiral uniform, he was too curious to see what you were watching than to change first.

“She was so clumsy as a kid, I always had to watch out for her,” You smiled. “Scraping her knees was a constant” You commented, feeling your heart swell with sadness as you remembered how upset Omani got every time she tripped up and fell over. You and her were very similar, you fell over a lot as a kid - Thrawn could confirm - and one time you even face planted and left a small scar on your upper lip, one that isn’t even visible but if you pointed it out, someone would notice.

“I understand that, was she an active child?” Thrawn asked curiously. In reply you rolled your eyes and let out a chuckle.

“Active is an understatement, she was uncontrollable in some aspects. There were times she got stroppy though, if she didn’t get her way, and those were the times it was hard to be a parent,” You sighed. “She was a very fragile kid, if she didn’t get her way she would start getting angry and kicking her feet” You paused the video playing on your device, looking to Thrawn who was staring up at you from his position on the bed. He had his head tilted to the side very slightly, an eyebrow raised but not in an insisting manner.

“I think she gets that trait from you” You smirked, intending for the comment to be brushed aside but Thrawn huffed once he heard what you had said. “I admit I was a stroppy child, but I grew out of that phase quickly” Thrawn defended himself, leaning his head back on the mattress and moving his elbow away to cross his arms over his chest, looking up at the ceiling and immediately contradicting his words as he pursed his lips. You didn’t say anything, laughing instead and biting your tongue to make sure you didn’t say anything that would make him more agitated.

“Aside from that though, she grew up a lot quicker than I anticipated. One day, she’s this little bundle of joy in my arms, the next she’s a fully grown woman with her own blaster in her hands” You sighed in a mellow manner, hanging your head and doing your best not to let the facts upset you. Thrawn sat up from his position on the bed and hesitantly rested his hand on your shoulder.

“Childhood always slips by much quicker than everyone expects. Adding onto that, she’s a Chiss as well, and our childhood is shortened by 4 years compared to yours” Thrawn explains. You know about the Chiss ageing system, you’ve always known it, but something about Thrawn saying it made you calm down and come to terms with the fact that Omani was a different species compared to you, she was half human but her genes were dominated by Thrawn’s, there was no denying it. She aged the same as him, spoke the same as him and looked exactly like him, but her face structure and habits were all taken from you. That was about the only thing that made you two related. But either way, no matter how much she looked different compared to you, she was still your little girl.

Both you and Thrawn agree - and have spoke about a few times - is that Omani was unexpected in the best way possible. You certainly didn’t plan on being a mother for a long time, or ever. Thrawn wasn’t in a good position to be a father and if anything, you shouldn’t have been parents at all. But because of your escape, and because of your decision to have a child, you’ve grown into the best version of yourself that you could ever be. Omani’s brought out the goodness inside you, she made you forget about the person you used to be back in the Empire, back when you tortured and killed people unapologetically. She made you see things clearly, and because of that you were complete. You didn’t fear anything, not after giving birth and raising Omani up until she was 14. You hoped Thrawn felt the same.

“What time is it?” You asked, closing over your holodevice and setting it down on the bedside table before looking back to Thrawn with a tired gaze. He looked over at the alarm on his table and sighed.

“17:45, we should probably get ready for bed” Thrawn yawned, running his hand through his hair and immediately messing it up. He ruffled his navy strands, ruining the sleek gel look he always wore. You felt privileged to see it in all honesty, no one else saw him in this type of way apart from yourself. Well, back at the academy Eli saw him like this as well whenever you three sparred in the training rooms, but you didn’t have a problem with that.

Coming to think of it now, where was Eli?

You frowned as the thought came across your mind, and all of a sudden you couldn’t stop thinking about it. You had been so focused on building up a sturdy commonality with Thrawn once again that you didn’t even realise who else was missing. Eli.

“H-hey, quick question” You spoke up as Thrawn stood up to head to the refresher.

“Yes?” He raised a brow, his back turned to you as he took off his Admiral top, revealing his thin black vest that hugged his muscular form beneath.

“I meant to ask this sooner, but where’s Eli?” You felt nervous about asking, but you were eager to know.

Eli was such an important part of your time at the academy. Yes, Thrawn was very important to you back when you trained there but Eli was your best friend, through thick and thin. He was a human that spoke Cheunh ontop of that as well, and he became a massive part of your life back at the Empire. You didn’t see him much after you graduated because you had your own squad but there was the occasional time when the both of you caught each other at the cantina and stayed there, talking till you were both kicked out.

Thrawn stayed quiet for a while, his body going stiff but eventually he cleared his throat and let out a plain, emotionless sigh.

“He was transferred many years ago to another commanding officer” Thrawn’s voice was oddly upsetting, he seemed depressed by just talking about the issue, you ended up feeling bad about even asking about it.

“The Emperor felt that he was distracting me too much from my duties as Admiral, at the time, and Eli was transferred, I’ve never heard from him since” Was all Thrawn said before walking out of his bedroom and leaving you alone to bask in your thoughts and brainstorm his answer.

“The... Emperor?...” Your voice trailed off, hand reaching out but eventually coming back down as his words dawned on you.

The Emperor.

-

When Thrawn came back to his bedroom, you were in the kitchen preparing yourself a drink, an alcoholic one. Thrawn didn’t have many spirits in his cupboard, he mostly had Caf pods, milk, tea bags, and Dasani water. But you managed to find an expensive bottle of Spotchka at the back of the cupboard, hidden away for no one to find, but due to the glow of the blue neon beverage, you spotted it immediately. You poured yourself a small glass, making sure not to spill any considering it looked and smelled like it costed more than Thrawn cared to admit, but you didn’t pour too much in case he was saving it for a special occasion.

Putting the lid back on and screwing it tightly to make sure no spillage would occur, you turned around and leaned lazily on the kitchen counter, holding onto the half full whiskey glass. You carefully sipped at the blue liquid, the sharp taste hit your taste buds but you didn’t cringe or spit it out. Spotchka was a drink you weren’t very familiar with, you hardly ever drank considering you were Imperial in your younger years and done nothing but work, and then after that you were a mother, so there was no time to sit around and get drunk. You weren’t saying you’d never had a drink before, you did. You just never really got drunk.

“I see you’ve found the spotchka” Thrawn’s voice startled you, almost causing you to spill the drunk but thankfully it didn’t tip over the edge as you regained your posture.

“You need to stop sneaking up on me” You chuckled, placing your free hand on your chest and taking another sneaky sip of the Spotchka in your glass. Thrawn smiled, removing the wet towel which was hanging over his neck and bundling it up in his large hands. He was now in his lounge wear, black vest and joggers with wet hair and tired eyes. Even you couldn’t deny, the man looked like a kriffing god. He could do nothing and look absolutely incredible, even at his age of 47. You admit, you were jealous he even looked that good, you wish you looked the same as you did 14 years ago but motherhood wasn’t kind to you.

“I think I’ll join you” He said, walking up beside you and getting himself a glass of his own, opening up the bottle and pouring himself some Spotchka. Turning around and leaning on the counter to match your position, he raised his glass close to you. In return, you raised your own and clinked it softly with his, offering a small ‘cheers’ before sipping at the blue drink. Thrawn took a generous sip before clearing his throat and rolling his head around his shoulders, sighing in relief at the sound of popping as his tense muscles relaxed. You copied his actions with a smile, using the base of your palm to push your chin to the side and crack your neck.

The two of you shared a moment of blissful silence, happily drinking at your Spotchka as your shoulders touched. Neither of you moved away, occasionally sneaking glances at each other but not enough to make the moment awkward. Nothing was ever really awkward between you both, everything always happened naturally and nothing was ever forced.

“You know, I have a proposition for you, if you’d like to listen?” Thrawn spoke after Maker knows how long, swirling the remaining Spotchka in his almost empty whiskey glass as he turned his head to look at you. In return, you nodded whilst finishing off your own drink, hiking it back before placing the glass on the counter and looking up to Thrawn.

“There’s an event, tomorrow night at the Imperial Palace. Many people, including myself, will be going,” He started, crossing his ankle over the other as he finished off his drink and placed it next to yours.

“Many Senators and other parties will be attending- I- I was thinking maybe you might want to go with me as my... partner?” Thrawn sounded so nervous, you weren’t even sure it was him you were speaking to. You spent a few seconds thinking about it. An Imperial Party, with Senators and full of people You loathed. But ontop of that, you’d get to go with Thrawn and maybe make a statement about being a rebel and also being his partner for the night. But then again, you couldn’t be too sure that being a rebel would be your role at the party. If that were the case, an assassination would surely take place.

“It sounds good to me, but aren’t I your prisoner?” You raised a reading brow, nudging his side softly as he looked away and blushed very slightly.

“You were a prisoner when Pryce was in control of you, but with me you’re a guest,” Thrawn answered.

“I’d never see you imprisoned like that again, Rcati, seeing you like that in the prison cell made me angry but also scared” Thrawn was genuine with his words, but you could tell he was careful with the way he constructed his sentences. He was more than angry and scared, you knew it, he was just too hesitant to admit it. Either way, you didn’t force him to open up about anything and by the looks of it, he knew you knew he was holding back with his words.

“In that case, sure, but what happens when I meet people and they ask me my occupation? Haven’t I been missing for 14 years?” You chuckled dryly, still looking at Thrawn who sighed and turned to directly look at you.

“The people attending the ball aren’t part of the team on Lothal, so no one will know who you are apart from me, and Pryce if she’s going” Thrawn explained with a calm exterior, gesturing words with his hands and rubbing the back of his neck as he cleared his throat.

“Hmm... okay...” You hesitantly agreed. “But what about an outfit? I’m not too fond of showing up in an Imperial uniform” You frowned, fiddling with the hem of your shirt which belonged to the man standing beside you. He rolled his eyes and nodded his head, arms still folded as he blew a loose strand of hair away from his eyes.

“I’ll have a tailor come down and get your measurements now, we’ve got little time to get everything organised” His arms fell back down to his side as he sat up from the counter and walked out of the kitchen to fetch his coms device. Sighing, you took both of the empty whiskey glasses and cleaned them out, leaving them on the dryer as you let out a small yawn and left the kitchen to see where Thrawn had gone.

By the time the tailor had arrived, you had washed up in the refresher and had your hair up in a bundle as you stood in the middle of the room with barely anything on. Thankfully, Thrawn had his back turned to you, sitting in his chair and analysing work from days prior as you got measured for your dress. You were wearing nothing but a pair of briefs and a bra that Thrawn managed to get for you. The tailor was a woman in her mid 50’s, greying hair and very delicate fingers as she wrote down each of your measurements with intricate detail. You held in a gasp every time the cold sashe of tape wrapped around a part of your body, from your hips, to your arm, to your legs. She measured absolutely everywhere, but you didn’t say anything.

“So, what design are you looking for, my dear?” The tailor asked, you were almost startled by what she called you but then you remembered she didn’t know you were a prisoner.

“J-just a simple gown thank you, I’m not too fussed” You reply shakily, rubbing your upper arms at the cold as the tailor started sketching ideas on her notepad whilst switching her glance from the paper to your body shape. You felt very exposed, shivering in the cold as you done a little awkward tapping motion with your feet in an attempt to warm yourself up.

“I’ll work right on it, my dear, what’s your shoe size?” The tailor asked. “Oh, I’m a (S/S)” You replied with a smile, picking up the black T-shirt from the ground and slipping it back on.

“Is there anything else you request, Grand Admiral?” The tailor asked with a clear, confident voice. You shuffled in your spot and crossed your arms as Thrawn turned back around in his seat, looking prepared to cover his eyes in case you were undressed, but relaxing once he realised you were dressed again.

“That’s all, thank you” He dismissed the tailor with the wave of his hand and in a flash, she was out of the room without another word with her tape and scribbled notes.

“Well that was riveting” You joked, your teeth chattering as you tried warming yourself up. Thrawn closed his data pad and stood up from his seat, making his way over to stand at your side and smile.

“Is it always this cold here?” You complained, frowning slightly as you continued rubbing your arms and clenched your jaw unconsciously. Thrawn rolled his eyes instinctively at your comment, unexpectedly scooping you up in his arms and, without a word, carrying you to his bedroom and dunking you on the mattress. You didn’t say anything, too taken aback by his actions as you lay on his bed with a shocked expression. Thrawn hid a smirk as he looked at your face, placing the covers over you and patting your shoulder before exiting the bedroom.

“Aren’t you coming?” You yelled out to him with a confused frown. “I’ve still got work to finish!” He replied from the main office.

“But You finished work two hours ago?!” You yelled back, sitting up in his bed and cupping the sides of your mouth so your voice could project further.

“You keep forgetting I’m the person in charge of this facility, Rcati!” Thrawn said, this time a chuckle in his voice as he replied to your eager sounding question. Sighing at his answer, you lie back down on the mattress and close your eyes, eventually slipping into unconsciousness as the silence surrounded you.

Thrawn listened carefully from his office, his eyes looking at the open door even though he couldn’t see you. He heard soft snoring a few minutes after your loud exchange of words and he smiled to himself, pausing his work to admire you, and just you. He didn’t want to move from his spot in case you heard his footsteps, but he wanted to see your face.

Thrawn was in a dangerous position. Each and everyday you were with him, his feelings for you grew uncontrollably. Everything you did drowned him with undeniable affection and he knew that it wasn’t a good thing. Loving you came at a price, if someone from the Empire or New Republic found out about the way he felt towards you, his career and life would he on the line. It wasn’t that he prioritised his work over you and Omani, he was just scared in case either of you bit the dust undeservingly.

For the time being, he had to keep his distance.

-

It was the day of the party. After 11 hours of sleep, you woke up to find Thrawn packing clothes for the trip ahead. He didn’t have work today due to the party and the limited time both of you had to get to Coruscant on time.

“Are you sure this is appropriate for a woman my age?” You asked the tailor who suited you in a black dress. You couldn’t believe that she had made this dress in under 24 hours, it was so beautiful and elegant, but you felt like you were looking at another person as you stared at yourself in the body sized mirror in front of you.

“Nonsense, my dear, you are going to a ball after all” The tailor replied, tightening the thread on the corset that wrapped around your waist comfortably, but at the same time you felt very sucked in.

Thrawn was out of his chambers, fetching his medals to wear on his Admiral Uniform at the party to obviously show to others that he was important. The thought made you roll your eyes. Typical Thrawn.

The tailor sorted your hair out naturally, placing a black headpiece on your head and adjusting it until she was happy. You looked like a Senator, but you were comfortable with that. She fitted you with jewellery and two long, black gloves that reached your upper arm, as well as a pair of black heels.

You looked and felt different, this was different than all the other Senator outfits you wore throughout the past years, you no longer felt like a New Republic Senator. You looked like an Imperial, and you hated that. Your worse fear was for someone from the Rebellion to find yku looking like that, and also being with Thrawn. You’d be considered a traitor and no one would trust you anymore, that frightened you. This whole ordeal made you uneasy, you weren’t sure why you agreed to do it in the first place, maybe boredom? A need of new enviromnent? You couldn’t exactly remember.

You flattened the material of the dress skirt with your palms, avoiding the chance of your nails catching the material as you sighed at yourself in the mirror.

“Thank you for everything, this is truly beautiful” You thanked the tailor as she finished up on your dress, smiling at you through the reflection before taking a step back and bowing politely to you. You unconsciously done the same which earned you a large smile from the tailor who seemed impressed at your kindness towards her. No more words were exchanged as she took her belongings and had a stormtrooper escort her out of the room. The soldier clad in white armour looked at you for a brief second before clearing their throat and excusing themselves out of the room and the door sheathed shut.

You looked around Thrawn’s office, pulling the dress skirt up and trying not to trip over yourself as you walked over to his office table and pulled out one of the drawers. Your assumption of him keeping a blaster under his desk was confirmed and you didn’t hesitate for a moment as you hiked the skirt of your dress right up to your hip, with great difficulty, and tucked it into the stockings you were wearing. Once you were all set, you checked your appearance before Thrawn returned and escorted you to the ship which would be taking the two of you to Coruscant.

[socalwriterbee]

Confessions Part 4

Catch up on Confessions

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Book: The Nanny Affair

Characters: Marie Castro x Sam Dalton, Jordan Le, Jenny

Rating/Warning: Teen+, Some Adult Language

Word Count: 2,339 +

Song Mention:

You Oughta Know By Alanis Morissette

Si Una Vez By Selena

Summary: After a breakup, Marie seeks her best friend out.

A/N: Songs that were mentioned are in italic. Tried to my best to translate the part of Si Una Vez as best I could.

Tag: @thenannyaffair-fanfics

Characters belong to Pixelberry

********

Marie patiently waited for her friend to respond to her message. If anyone can help make things better it was her best friend.

Jenny squeals as soon as she swings the door open, really finding her best friend standing before her with a new look.

“Marie, how is it possible for you to look like a thousand times better in person?” Jenny hugs her tightly, gently pulling at the ends of her hair, not knowing if she really just a chopped off a good amount of her hair.

“You can stop pulling my hair. I really did cut it.” She laughs at her friend. “Are you gonna let me in? The champagne is waiting.”

Jenny releases her, pushing her to arms length, really taking in her friends new look. Skin tight black pleather pants paired with black Louboutin pumps, a revenge red colored crop top and her newly cut hair.

Jenny drags her by the hand and leads them into the apartment, slamming the door behind them.

“Don’t kill me Marie, but you didn’t happen to bring any orange juice?” Jenny asks, making her way across the island.

Marie shakes her head at her best friend, she wasn’t surprised Jenny didn’t have anything in her apartment. She had been the one who would stock up the fridge and cabinets with food. If it had been up to Jenny, they would only have vodka in the freezer. One she would bet a good amount of money on that being the only thing in the freezer right now.

“Jenny, do you at least have something to nibble on while we drink?” Marie asks.

She places the two bottles of champagne down on the counter, watching Jenny open and close the cabinets, then moves to the fridge.

“Here put this one in the fridge while I open this one. We’ll just order something to be delivered.” She tells Jenny, handing her one of the bottles.

“I have apples.. well an apple.” Jenny points to her sad looking fruit basket.

“One that seems to be well past being edible. it’s beginning to shrivel up.”

The popping sound of the cork makes Jenny jump, pulling out two glasses and handing them to Marie. After pouring and ordering some food, Marie kicks off her heels and takes her usual spot on the sofa, when one of them is going through a breakup, tucking one leg under the other. Jenny takes the opposite side of the sofa.

“What do we toast too?” Jenny asks.

“The future.”

Marie raises her glass to meet her friends, clinking their glasses together. Jenny eyes her with some concern, wondering what her friend had been through in the last twelve hours or so.

“To the future.”

Jenny takes a good drink of the champagne, while Marie tosses her full glass back, the bubbles tickling the back of her throat, leaving it empty and reaching for the bottle to pour more.

“So Marie, what the hell happened? Wasn’t everything going well between you two?” Jenny asks while tapping her well manicured nails on the fluted glass, impatiently waiting for her to answer.

“Is this situation fit for just drinking champagne? Or do I pull out the Vodka from the freezer?”

“It’s a start. It’ll get the job done.” She gives Jenny a wide grin. “Like I told you, it’s over between me and Sam.”

“How? Why?” Jenny sits up a bit straighter, again waiting for an explanation.

“Sam caught me kissing Jordan.” Marie tosses another glass back. “No.. No..” She wiggles her finger at Jenny “Sam walked in on Jordan kissing me.”

“Why would Jordan do that?”

“He confessed he has feeling for me.”

“No!” Jenny mouths drops open at the revelation.

Marie just nods her head. Last night coming back to her, making her head spin. “That’s not all, he told me Sam was seeing Lana behind my back.”

“That uptight blonde from the house warming party, the mother of one of Mason’s friends?” Jenny asks.

“The one and the same.”

“I’m gonna need you to start from the beginning and everything in between that led you to..to this new look and you chugging champagne like its grape juice.” Her friend said.

Taking a deep breath, Marie began the events of last night from Jordan surprising her at work to him telling her how he feels about her. The moment Sam walked in on them, him storming out, not waiting to hear an explanation of what he saw. It felt like she had been talking for hours, the one break Marie took was to get the other bottle of champagne while Jenny got the food they ordered.

“You need to try this hash..it's amazing.” Jenny hands her the container, as she takes the one Marie had in her hands.

“He just walked away. Left me there standing like a fool. All because he wants space. Because I believe or believed he would cheat on me. But look at how we started, Jen. He was engaged.” Taking a spoonful of the corned beef hash, the different textures from soft to crispy pieces to the exploding flavors of the salty, spiced and sour make her moan in agreement with Jenny.

“Sweetie, don’t get mad at me but.. are you sure he wanted to end things?”

Marie notices a shift in her friend, shaking her head at Jenny. She played Sam’s words again and again last night.

“I’m positive. He wanted to slow things down, wanted space. As far as I know we’re done.”

Jenny stayed silent.

“You don’t understand, wanting to slow things down from a relationship in the dark, a relationship a handful of people knew about. That’s what he meant Jen.” Marie snaps at her.

“Ok.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to..” Marie trails off.

“Don’t worry about it. Besides I got something, that always works.”

The look that appeared on Jenny’s face was a mischievous one, one she knew all too familiar, it was the same one she would give her when Jenny was going through a rough time with a guy.

Getting up from the sofa she walks away, coming back in a few seconds with a full bottle of vodka. She grabs her phone, connecting it to the sound system.

Marie hid her face in the palms of the hands, knowing what was about to come. “Oh no!! no..no..no!” She shook her head.

“yes…yes.. yes” Jenny begins to dance before the music starts. “Come on Marie, this song has gotten us..ok mostly me through breakups.”

The beat of Alanis Morissette’s ‘You oughta Know’ fills the apartment..

An older version of me

Is she perverted like me

Would she go down on you in a theater

Marie began bobbing her head to the beat as the song went on, until she jumps up and stands on top of the couch with Jenny, the both of them singing at the top of their lungs.

And every time I scratch

My nails down someone else’s

Back I hope you feel it

Well can you feel it

Well I’m here to remind you

Of the mess you left when

You went away…You

You..oughta know

As the song comes to an end, adrenaline runs through Marie, ok mostly the alcohol they had been drinking. But at this point it’s what she needed to get every feeling out of her system. Jenny’s breakup playlist continues to play and after finishing the second bottle of champagne, they made it to the bottle of vodka

They didn’t care how loud they were singing or the noise they made from dancing and the things that hit the floor after bumping into them. It was something they did, two best friends trying to help the other navigate through this moment in life.

“There’s a song.. a song.. I want to add..add..yeah” The words coming out of Marie’s mouth a bit slurred.

She grabbed the phone from the coffee table, trying to focus on searching for the song. Swaying back and forth, she jumped with drunken glee once having found it. The Marachi/Cumbia infused ballad came through the speakers, her hips moving to the Cumbia beat.

“Yass.. Get it girl.” Jenny encouraged her as she sat down, taking a little breather.

Marie did her best Selena impression, twisting and doing flamenco moves. She began singing.

Yo, Te di todo mi amor y más

(I gave you all my love and more)

Y tú, No reconoces ni lo que es amar

(And you won’t recognize what it is to love)

Si una vez dije que te amaba, hoy me arrepiento

(If I told you once that I loved you. Today, I regret it)

Si una vez dije que te amaba, no sé lo que pensé, estaba loca

(If I told you once that I loved you. I don’t know what I was thinking, I must’ve been crazy)

Si una vez dije que te amaba

(If I told you that I loved you)

Y que por ti la vida daba

(And that I’d give my life for you)

Si una vez dije que te amaba, no lo vuelvo a hacer

(If I told you that I’d loved you. I won’t do it again)

Ese error es cosa de ayer

(It was an error that was made in the past)

Jenny cheered her on until the end, not knowing what her best friend just sang and danced her heart out too.

After a moment of trying to catch her breath, she watched as Marie fell to her knees and began crying, her body shaking as it released every emotion she had bottled up. The act of trying to be strong came crashing down around her. She went to her and hugged her, whispering that it’ll all be ok.

******

Once she had sobered up somewhat, Marie called an Uber to take her back home, against Jenny’s best efforts to try and make her stay. They had come to an agreement of her moving back in. She wasn’t going to live in a place Sam was paying for besides she couldn’t afford the rent on her salary.

Making her way to her apartment, her vision a bit impaired, she fumbled through her bag for the keys, jingling as they fell to the floor.

“Shit.”

Bending down to get them, she stumbles a bit to the side, balancing herself against the wall before she could trip and fall over her own feet. The vodka and champagne still running through her system, she could make it, once she got up it was only a few more steps, she told herself.

Marie noticed a pair of shoes making their way towards her, her gaze began to travel until they stopped on grey eyes, his lips a thin line. He was reaching down to help her.

“I don’t need your help!” She put a hand out, stopping him before he could touch her. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Come on Marie, let me help you up.” Sam voiced calmly but filled with a bit of concern for her well being. “How did you get here? How much have you had to drink? And your hair, it looks..”

“What’s it to you? I’m a bit more sober then I was earlier. I’m perfectly..perfectly fine.”

Marie stood up too quickly and stumbled, she felt Sam wrap an arm around her waist, supporting her weight against his body. Grabbing her keys, he leads them into her apartment.

“Just stand there for a moment while I lock the door. I’ll take you to bed..I mean..uh help you into bed.”

“I’m fine Sam, I’m inside this beautiful penthouse you got for your mistress.” She twirls around, showing him the space around her. “So, you can see your way out. You can stand on the other side of the door to make sure it gets locks.” Marie hiccups, maybe she wasn’t as sober as she thought.

“I’m not going anywhere until I know you’re ok.”

Sam makes his way past her, grabbing her by the wrist and leading her towards the bedroom. Letting her go, he begins tossing pillows off the bed keeping just two. He pulls back the comforter to allow her to crawl in.

“Oh that’s real nice of you Mr. Dalton. Do you do that for all your employees?” Marie asked staring at him as he reaches for her.

“Get into bed, you need to sleep your over-indulgence off. I’ll be here when you wake.”

Marie starts to undress, pulling her top over her head.

“What are you doing?” The words coming out as a raspy whisper from Sam.

Marie stares at the man that left her. She was going to show him what he was going to miss. She began by taking off the heels that had been killing her since putting them back on. She unbuttoned and unzipped her pants, slowly lowering them and stepping out of them. Marie stood there in a see through black lace bralette and matching thong.

She could feel Sam’s burning gaze taking her in. She heard his breathing hitch and a smile came across her lips.

“I’m just getting ready for bed, Mr. Dalton. Just like you said.” She says coyly.

Walking pass him, running her finger tips across his chest. She climbs into bed, the softness of her sheets envelope her semi-naked body.

As she begins to doze off, the side of the bed shifts under her. “What are you doing here?” She asked him again.

She didn’t hear Sam respond, so she kept going.

“You shouldn’t be here. It’s over between us.” She yawns as her eyes begin too close. “Sam? Are you still here?”

Marie could feel her back pressing against the side of his leg. Sam caresses the newly cut strands of her hair.

“I’m still here. I’m not going anywhere..” He whispered.

“Can you do one last thing for me?”

“Whatever it is, I’ll do it Marie..I’m sorr..”

“Don’t fire Jordan.” She said before her eyelids became too heavy to keep open and slips into a deep slumber.

[rmtndew]

All I’ve Ever Known

Summary: Fiona’s life is a shattered fraction of what it used to be. She’s trying to navigate her new normal when she meets Detective Marshall, who gives her something more to look forward to.

Pairing: Marshall and OFC.

Rating: PG

Warnings: Mentions of death, cancer.

A/N - This was intended as a short drabble but it got out of hand and became a multi-chapter story instead. It’s my first Marshall fic and the first fan fic that I’ve written in over a decade. The title comes from the song ‘All I’ve Ever Known’ from Hadestown: ‘I was alone so long, I didn’t even know that I was lonely. Out in the cold so long, I didn’t even know that I was cold. Turned my collar to the wind, this is how it’s always been. All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own, but now I want to hold you, too.’

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5

The first Wednesday in October was the first day that truly felt like fall had arrived. There was a chill in the air that morning and the fallen leaves had taken on a lovely earthy smell after the rain from the night before had blown them off the trees and pummeled them to the ground. I made a mental note to ask one of the neighbor boys to clean the leaves off the driveway and stone path through the yard so Mom didn’t accidentally slip on them. She’d been so cooped up that summer, I didn’t want anything to be in her way of finally getting to enjoy the weather.

The drive to work was quiet and lovely. The sun warmed my car and when I reached the catering shop where I worked, I sat there for a few minutes, drinking my coffee and soaking up the feeling on my skin. I always got to work early so that I could have those few peaceful moments before the chaos of the day started.

Once inside the shop, I started working with my boss Darcy on filling the boxes for the day's orders. We had two major deliveries that day - a work conference at a hotel, and a training seminar being held in the public library late that afternoon. Other than that, we had our standing order for the homicide unit of the police department. At the beginning of the year, a man had been murdered and according to the news that covered it, there was next to no evidence and the case was sure to go cold. But a couple of the detectives wouldn’t let go and against the odds, they found the murderer and got a full confession out of him. The victim’s wife had been so grateful that she decided to have an ongoing order every Wednesday to buy lunch for the detectives who’d solved the murder, as well as their colleagues. She had received quite a bit of money after her husband’s death and decided to use some of it to pay them back in a small way. That order was always mine. It was fairly small and I could carry it in my car. The detectives were always polite but never tried to make small talk, which I enjoyed. The chatty orders went to Darcy’s nephew Nick, who could hold a conversation with a brick wall and enjoy it. 

Once the boxes for the detectives were filled and loaded into my car, I drove down to the station. I took the dolly from my trunk and strapped down the two insulated containers that had the boxed lunches packed in them. The wind whipped around me as I worked, blowing my hair in my eyes. I pushed it away and held it back with my free hand as I wheeled the food behind me. When I got into the building, an officer went through the containers, as always, to make sure I wasn’t bringing in any weapons, or whatever. The first few times he checked them, I was nervous that he’d find something, knowing full well that there was absolutely nothing illegal in them. Then, once I got to know him a bit, I had considered bringing him a cookie from the shop since I saw him every week, but then the irrational fear that he would think I was trying to bribe him to overlook the non-existent illegal materials I wasn’t trying to smuggle in took over. So, like with everything else in my life, I pushed away any urge, no matter how small, to socially interact with anyone longer than absolutely necessary. That’s why, after delivering there for several weeks, I knew he was Officer Bates (he wore a badge) and I was just ‘Waverly’, as in Waverly Box Catering, my company's name. 

Once Officer Bates checked to make sure everything in my containers was safe, he walked me to the elevator and hit the button for me. Thankfully the elevator was empty so that I wasn’t forced to make small talk with the officers or detectives outside of the homicide unit that always questioned why none of the other units got free lunches. The first few times I’d been asked it was awkward, all the other times after those were both awkward and annoying. 

When I reached the homicide unit floor, I made my way to their break room, where some of the detectives were waiting for me. I started unpacking the boxed lunches, placing them on the table, making sure that the names were clearly visible. As I placed the empty insulated containers back on my dolly, my phone rang. Normally I didn’t take calls on the job, but it was from Mom’s doctor’s office. 

I left the break room and found a quiet hall to answer the phone. It was a nurse called Karen confirming Mom’s appointment the following week. We’d made sure to write it on the calendar to remember it, but I thanked her for the reminder anyway and told her that we’d see her next Wednesday. After hanging up, I went back to the break room to collect my equipment. I was surprised to find that every single box had been claimed but one. I glanced at the name: Detective Marshall. Normally I didn’t keep track of who ordered what after the boxes had been filled and labeled, but I knew Detective Marshall’s order by heart. While every other detective switched their orders up, trying different things on the menu, Detective Marshall’s had remained the same every week. A cuban sandwich - whole, plain chips, and a peanut butter cookie. There were times when I’d be doing mindless tasks - washing the dishes, brushing my teeth, filling Mom’s pill box - when their order would randomly play through my mind, like some strange mantra. It was an odd thing to find calming but it reminded me of one of the exercises my therapist had me do as a teenager when my anxiety attacks would get bad. She had me multiply numbers, or mentally list every detail of my bedroom that I could think of, or recite the alphabet backwards. It was simple, mundane, ground exercises and without ever knowing me, Detective Marshall had become my adult version. 

I was about to leave when a uniformed officer came in. He went to the coffee pot but kept eyeing the box. It was nothing to me, really, if he took it. Detective Marshall could probably handle themselves against a lunch thief, but my gut wouldn’t let me let it go. So instead of leaving, I decided to take the box and hand deliver it.

I left my dolly behind and made my way back down the hall where I’d taken my call earlier. I’d noticed several detectives had private offices there and assumed their office would be there, too. I was right. I found Lieutenant Detective Marshall’s name engraved in a gold name plate mounted on a closed door. I took a deep breath before giving a hard and loud but short knock. 

“Yeah,” a man’s voice called out. 

He didn’t say anything else but I took it as an invitation to open the door. When I did, I was met with my first sight of Detective Marshall: A tall man with a short beard and a head of messy brown curls. He was wearing a forest green sweater, the sleeves pushed up to show his forearms. A gun and badge were clipped to the side of his jeans that hugged his muscular thighs. He was holding a folder, looking at it intently. After a moment, he looked up at me. He must have expected it to be someone he worked with because his expression went from neutral to confused in less than a second. He tilted his head, a crease appearing between his eyes - his beautiful blue eyes - as his brow furrowed. 

“Can I help you?”  

“I, um…” I swallowed hard. “I’m from Waverly Catering. I brought you your lunch,” I said, frozen on the spot at the entrance to his office. 

He looked more confused. “Don’t you usually leave them in the break room?” he asked. He sounded like he had a British accent.  

“Yes. And I did. But you didn’t come to get it. I was about to leave and it was the only one left and an officer came in, eyeing it, I was afraid that they would take it.” I suddenly felt my face get hot as this handsome man stared at me while I mumbled out some weird explanation for why I was interrupting his work. “Sorry,” I said, holding out the box. “Here.”

The slightest hint of a smile tugged at one corner of his mouth as he walked towards me. “Thank you.” He took the box from my outstretched hand, his fingers lightly brushing mine as he did. I was sure it was an accident and yet it instantly made my pulse race. “I appreciate it.” 

“You’re welcome,” I said, then turned to get out of there before I could embarrass myself further. 

“Do you make the cookies?”

I stopped and looked back at him. “What?”

He held up his box. “Are you the one who makes the cookies in here or do you just deliver?” 

“Oh. Yeah, I make them most of the time.”

He gave me a short lived, closed lip smile. “They’re very good.” 

My brain reacted as if I’d never heard a more flattering compliment in my life and I had to physically restrain myself from giggling. “Thank you,” I managed to say without betraying my giggling brain. “Have a good day.”

I left his office feeling like a teenage girl who’d just said something embarrassing in front of her crush and I couldn’t figure out why. The feeling lasted until I was back in my car. 

“Come on, Fiona, you’re a grown woman,” I whispered to myself, massaging my temples. “Don’t do this. Don’t do this.”

The last thing I needed on top of all of my responsibilities and already emotionally complicated current life situation was an unnecessary crush on a man just because he had pretty eyes and liked my cookies. But good heavens his eyes were pretty.

    _____________________________________

When I got home that afternoon, I found Mom in the living room. She was watching a cooking show. I went and gave her a kiss on the top of her head. Her hair was growing back just enough to feel like soft baby hair. I jokingly called it her duck feathers.

“How was your day, sweetie?” she asked.

I sat on the arm of the couch, facing her in the big recliner that swallowed her up. “It was good. Not too busy. I had my delivery to the police station again,” I said, letting myself grin. “I met one of the detectives, too. He was very handsome.” 

She looked at me, her cheeks a pretty pink color. It was such a wonderful sight after months of her being pale and gray. “Oh! What does he look like?” 

“He looks...manly,” I said. She laughed. “He was taller than me, which is always rare and attractive, and he has curly hair, and a beard, which I’m not usually attracted to but it really worked for him.” I sighed. “And his eyes. They were such a lovely blue.”

“Is he single?”

I shrugged and laughed. “I don’t know. I didn’t check for a ring. It wasn’t really that type of interaction,” I said. “I was just giving him his lunch and was surprised by how gorgeous he was.” I stood up. “Oh, and I think he’s English. He sounded like it anyway.”

“Honey, look for a ring next week!” 

“I won’t deliver next week, Nick will. You’ve got your appointment with Dr. Turner,” I reminded her. “I’m going to start dinner. Do you want anything special?”

She pointed at the TV. “They’re making chicken carbonara, it looks awfully tempting.”

I smiled. “I think I might be able to rustle some up for you. I’ll let you know when I’m done.”

“Thank you, Fi.”