#when really they’re just rephrasing shit that’s already been said because they were prompted to talk about people dying or whatever

[legallypumpkinn]

One of my favorite parts of the argument against AI is how little most everybody arguing against artificial intelligence actually knows what the fuck they’re on about.

Artificial intelligence on its own contributes a SHITTON to your daily life online. What is today considered “artificial intelligence” versus what artificial intelligence started off as (being a way to use machines to make scripts more efficient) are two tenuously connected concepts. Does your phone occasionally autocorrect when it thinks you’ve spelled shit wrong, until it eventually gives up because you keep using the “misspelling”? Do you like when your social media feed shows you posts by people you don’t follow? That’s, arguably, AI - the machine is seeing patterns in behavior, so, to save both the user and the machine time, it makes this pattern easier to access, rather than the user having to take possible minutes to search for what they wanted rather than it simply showing up first thing.

AI is not inherently evil, in the same way as knives are not inherently evil. What is evil is when people take shit to input into their scripts or whatever that is not theirs and then essentially clone said stolen artifact with dna from a multitude of other stolen artifacts and then pass it off as their own work. But that is NOT what the majority of machine learning is, and demonizing people who are using this learning to be more efficient (without taking shit that isn’t theirs!!) are not the people we should be fighting.

In case you're still reflexively on the fence when I proclaim that the conversation about AI has progressed to a truly batshit level of reactionary mythology, people on twitter are currently calling out the animators for Spiderverse for using a digital interpolator to assist with lining, because a documentary used the term "machine learning" to describe it.

Apparently using digital tools is taking work away from real artists. I am excited for 6 months time when the discourse has evolved into "all movies should be hand-inked on the inside of Palaeolithic caves to escape the corrupting labour-stealing influence of the pencil".

(Yes this is currently a minority opinion in this instance, largely because people just really like Spiderverse. But the fact that these arguments are being seriously made shows how far off the deep end this conversation has gone. These types of arguments for blanket technology bans already made little to no sense due to the double standard applied, and this demonstrates that by removing the double standard and taking them closer to their logical conclusion - all labour saving tools are bad, especially if they involve a spooky computer algorithm).

[botwstoriesandsuch]

hey Kip! I’m sending asks into different writer’s askboxes, inquiring about cool themes/development facts/stuff the author wants to share about their personal favorite work of their own. What’s yours? :)

Ok so this ask is old and when I first got it I was like “dang I don’t really have a lot to talk about, what should I talk about I could those revalink headcanons the Kip Cut that turned into a working fic uhh hmm maybe I’ll just make something new to talk about real quick” and then I did and now there is a 12+ chapter Revalink fic in my drafts and I’m gonna talk about that now, whoopsie doopsie [click "j" to skip]

aHEM, OK so allow me to break out the primary school white board because yeah, I have a lot of thoughts and the oxford comma has not yet made it’s home into my brain. oh and spoilers for paraphrase. for both all of Chapter one and future events in later chapters, but it’s really nothing you couldn’t surmise from the AO3 tags

so I really wanted to tell the story of Revali and Link learning and struggling to love again after the less-than-fortunate events of Botw, but I wanted a...how you say...fresher, approach on the subject? Like I know we always say that fanfic writers writing the same tropes and stories time and time again is good because we eat that shit up--but at the same time I had asian parenting as was told never to half ass anything ever, no matter what. So now I'm gay and extra and have depression maybe and oh would you look at that @motherhyrule has dropped a beautiful revalink prompt right into my lap

Great so now that we have, that, I shall take you on the step by step process on how to make a :sparkles: story. So step one is to spend at least five to eleven business days for your white board to dismantle your genre and themes and work them around your character arcs. Luckily I have prepared one ahead of time

s*breaks out those laser pointers that uni professors use* So let's start with defining genre. As define because I HATE you, fuck you. I want you to suffer and writhe on the ground, motherfucker. How dare you think that I would give you nothing but pure predictable fluff, fuck you and yours

is the set of expectations that your audience has when consuming a piece of media

And the great thing about fanfiction is that unlike movies or book where the genres are more vague like, "oh it's a noir mystery genre. so there's a crime, maybe a murder, and a detective and a criminal." or "oh it's a teen romance. so there's some white people and a morally questionable six-pack 18 year old love interest that will be painted as desirable for some reason" BUT with fanfiction HALF of the work out the window, because as soon as you see those #revalink #aro sidon #zelpha #revali is an idiot and #found family tags you already know what's up.

Now what's so great about genre and expectation? Well the fun thing about it is that

I will use it to fucking break you.

... ... ...

<3 For example! <3

In Chapter 1: Holes, you already expect there to be revalink, you already expect them to be soulmates with the soulmarks and there's angst and yadayada ya. Revali and Link have to match because thatttss what this is all about, this is about them! This is about cute, little soulmarks and romantic words!

But whoooopsie doopsie [disney channel laugh track plays] they DON'T match anymore! Link's got a different mark! The number one rule of this entire genre has been broken whoooooooooooooooops. *ba dum tiss*

You might notice with a lot of my writing that I do this a lot, this whole..."oop but there's one little thing that's different." TebaSaki sick fic? Ok cool, but what if Teba burns an irreplaceable relic of the Rito champion to fight a wizzrobe first to characterize why his dumbass clicks with Saki. Mipha deciding to persue Link? Ok what if she chases after a dragon to externalize this conflict as she pierces it's flesh for a scale. Link fighting a Lynel? Ok but what if it's actually a sidlink angst fic in disguise and it's also world building on how Link deals with the bloodmoon that erases all of his efforts which is sort of similar to how his existence was erased from Hyrule 100 years ago mwaahahaha! Ok now that I say this outloud I think I just have a pattern of using fight scenes to externalize character growth. I like fight scenes...anyways.

I think another great thing about the realm of fanfiction is that with the tagging system, I can basically use a chekhov's gun sort of deal, without doing any writing. You know I'm gonna use that gun marked "soulmates" but you don't know when I'm gonna shoot it, and you SURE as hell don't know how.

And huzzah! One of the main points of conflict both drives the tension between Revali and Link, solidifies the unique genre and setting of this world, while also creating a new mystery that will carry over for the next few chapters.

Is Revali right in that Link's rebirth makes him destined for someone new now? What will Link do with the information that his soulmark has changed? Why did it change? Did Revali's change as well? How does anything fucking work right now?

And sure, you might be able to tell where things will end with them, but you sure as fuck will not know how because I HATE you. Fuck you. I want you to suffer and writhe on the ground, motherfucker. How dare you think that I would give you nothing but pure predictable fluff. I am not your goddamn fairy godmother, I will do as I fucking please. You will suffer as you fucking deserve, fuck you and your little tiny--

/j

Oh! But you might have noticed on my little planning whiteboard thing that there was a little T-Chart! For Revali and Link! That's because the next important thing besides plot (and in a lot of cases, including this one, it's argued to be even MORE important than plot) is

~CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT~

[to the tune of that history of the world video on youtube]

So yes, it's a little T-Chart outlining their character views in relation to the themes. And the great thing about themes is that they're not something you can necessarily predict in the same way you can with the genre and plot.

But now see, I'm very lazy so I'm just gonna plagiarize @hyrule-kingdom-updates thingy [that you should read btw] because they said my point quite clear enough

Now I don't really need to care about those points about bond and relationships and being understood, because I'm dealing with already established canon characters. I'm not some NERD who dabbles with entire casts of ocs who even cares about ocs not me that's for sure ahaahahaahahahahahaahahahahahAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *cries in my orphaned WTTU fic* AHAHAHA*sobs*DONT FUCKING LOOK AT ME THAT WAY I SWEAR--

/j I love ocs

But the points I do wanna focus on is the idea that characters provide new perspectives on the theme, and that characters growth can be tracked based on their wants, lies, and needs.

So see, themes can be predicted the same as genre/plot because while you can have the same fanfic plots and tropes, theme will always vary!

Sometimes it's a journey of selfworth with Revali! Sometimes it's an exploration of trauma with Link. Sometimes it's about how you deal with the vulnerabilities of love with Mipha. Sometimes there's straight up NOOOO theme, and people just be fucking, and kissing, and baking, and having a good time. And that is totally fine too!

But I'm not a fucking coward.

I'm gonna weave in themes with my plot, because I fucking can.

I'm not a weakling like you.

Do you hear me, 2019 Kip? Do you hear me Demmers? Do you hear me Quill? I'm coming for your ass. You think you're so great, but I'm coming for you. Rest assured that your graves will be as deep as your sculptured pride--

Heeeere is that T-Chart again, plus more!

yyyyyYou might notice that Revali and Link are quite parallel, to paraphrase. Ayoooo, see what I did there? *dabs* I'm a genius. Anywho

They both start off the same way: 100 years ago they were in love and happy. Basically the equivalent of childish naivety. For the first time in their lives, life is whimsical and charming, and they make each other happy. In fact, it's almost a flaw with how they perceive this happiness. But don't worry! It doesn't last long!

You know what happens.

I think the chart is pretty self explanatory. Revali builds walls fast enough to give a republican a wet dream. Meanwhile Link makes every aromantic in the chat groan with his doubled down sentiments in the idea that his chances of being truly happy again are gone.

Now, I can't exactly describe the full on process of the inbetweens, and where Revali and Link are gonna go from here, because...you have to read it for yourself! Heehee...but something I did think was fun was how these character views on the themes are revealed. Because you'll notice that, I never give exposition. Ever.

Ok well, let me rephrase that. I never give exposition scenes. I will never give you a big LOTR fancy wizard scene explaining the ins and outs of a character's question or the world's magic or whatever. I'm a very impatient Kip, and I value efficiency. Nonono, it's all about multi tasking, baby!

Chapter 1: Holes is divided into three parts.

Post 100 Years - Medoh (Establishes Ghost Rev/Bonk Head Link's view)

100 Years Ago - Flight Range (Establishes old Revalink views)

Post 100 years - Mark (Develops Ghost Rev/Bonk Head Link's view in contrast to who they once were)

I think the way that you structure flashbacks is incredible vital, as it's a very quick way to characterize people without having them say stuff like "I used to be like you, until I took an arrow to the knee" or whatever.

And with the main structure of the chapters and the fic as a whole is focus on their characters, that means I can hide whatever other stuff I want in those scenes, becuase you're too busy absorbing the fun character stuff to realizing I'm giving you boring exposition. Like for example:

Post 100 Years - Medoh and Mark

Foreshadowing for the end of the fic

Set up connection to Medoh with Revali

Link has defeated Windblight

Link has been visiting Revali every night for the past few days

Link has already met Kass and presumably Teba

Link doesn't have the Mastersword

Revali's Gale is still an ability that needs master and practice on Link's end

And that's just some of the stuff.

And see, the only reason I can efficiently give all of this information regarding character, and even exposition, is because of the theme. The themes make everything relevant, and everything circles and encompasses one another, so there's absolutely no wasted space. I mean don't even get me started on how it's gonna be to characterize the other characters around this

I don't wanna talk about the other characters too much either because that's spoilers, but you can probably take a gandar based on my notes.

And oh my god this is just on the theme of the faults that come with "soulmates" and "true love" and all that, and how even magical destined relationships still require work and effort, and that no one thing or person solves all your problems. And that's not even TOUCHING the shit on trauma and scars. I didn't think it was even possible for me to talk about botw without touching on that, ha. Ah well, I've been talking for too long.

Revalink has a lot o' writing potential so das pretty cool yeah, I am excite

[marvinswriting]

Jason

hey, you guys remember jason from the movie? the one gretchen hooked up with but he didn't actually care about her? yeah :) ALSO REGINA POV?!?!? tw: bullying, suffocation, manipulation, shane omen mention g/t mean girls

I wasn't controlling.

Well- let me rephrase that.

There were rules for being plastic. I made sure Karen and Gretchen followed those rules. That wasn't controlling. Just, guidelines. They're rules in place to help the other plastics. Dress codes, what clubs you can and can't join, you can't buy a dress without the others approval, don't date your friend's exes-

but totally new boys were fair game. 

So before you ask, no, that's not why I'm against Gretchen dating Jason. 

On surface level, Jason seemed like a nice guy.

But he constantly blew off Gretchen, he flirted with other girls, and overall was totally using her.

And that's not even getting into how he treats tinies.

That's right.

Jason is a two-faced fucking asshole.

And none of the giants can see it.

I mean- I'm sure they're suspicious. I know Damian notices when Janis stiffens the second Jason walks in the room. And, Cady has probably picked up on the way Aaron gets quiet. If Gretchen has caught on to anything, she totally ignores it. I mean- Janis, Aaron, and I tried telling our friends in the begging. Gretchen didn't want to hear it. She's got a huge crush on the guy and totally ignores all red flags. 

So we gave up getting through to her. 

Besides, who would believe us? Jason was so sweet whenever our giants were around.

I guess when we collectively decided we couldn't get through to Gretchen- all the other giants were a lost cause too. And that was months ago. We're in too deep now.

"Allow me to take it back to the drawing board and suggest the best idea we've had since day one," Janis huffed. We were in an empty hallway after school for 'english help'. We've been staying after a lot more recently. 

It's been getting worse.

Jason isn't trying to be sneaky anymore. He'll pick up Aaron without asking, conveniently drop his textbook on the cafeteria table right next to Janis, wrap his arm around Gretchen when I'm on her shoulder. 

Yet nobody has caught on.

Janis continued. "Why don't we just tell our giants what he's doing?"

"Because Gretchen won't listen to me."

"Good thing there's three other friends." Janis points out.

I rolled my eyes, waving my hand dismissively. Of course, Janis didn't understand how it felt not to have her giant listen to her. Her and Damian practically share a mind, if anything it's a shock he hasn't started asking questions. "Fine, if you know what's best for everyone, go talk to Damian. I'm sure you two will solve everything with your buddy buddy perfect communication skills. Janis has a giant who actually listens to her! Wow! You don't have to rub it in." I cross my arms over my chest, leaning back against the wall.

Aaron blinks, his gaze bouncing between both of us nervously.

"I wasn't-" Janis pauses, letting her hands fold in her lap. "I wasn't rubbing anything in. Listen- Regina, I'm sorry Gretchen won't listen. Truly. I'm being genuine right now. But don't make me feel guilty for trying to come up with a solution to something affecting all three of us."

"Right," I mumble, guilt rising in my stomach. "Sorry. I just-"

My voice trails off but neither Janis nor Aaron push for me to continue talking. Gretchen was somebody I could always trust to be there and listen to me. Now she didn’t. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to make her listen. We're silent for a while while I regroup my emotions, not wanting to snap for no reason again. 

"I have tried talking to Gretchen recently."

"And how did it go?" Aaron prompted.

"Well, it fucking went." I shrug. "Gretchen isn't used to having boys like her. I love her but crushes directed to her don't happen often. So of course she accused me of being jealous a boy finally liked her and not me."

"Maybe it had to do with how you worded it?" Janis suggests.

"Well, how else do I word 'hey maybe you should break up with the boy you're not even officially dating yet because he's toxic, a cheater, not actually in love with you, also harassing your tiny friends'?"

"Literally any way but that." Janis mumbled.

I shrug again, pulling out my phone. "Well, I did my best. You know emotions aren't my thing." I want to cry a little just thinking about the talk last week. But I don't. Crying won't fix anything. 

"Regina, why can't you be happy that a boy likes me for once?! I know you're used to all the boys falling head over heels for you, but this is the first time a cute boy has put in the effort to care and call back and-"

"But he doesn't, Gretchen! He doesn't call back. He. Doesn't. Care! I'm doing this for you because nobody else is gonna tell you. Jason is bad news. He doesn't care about you, or Karen, or Cady, or Damian, and he really doesn't give a shit about Janis, Aaron, or I!"

"Just let me be happy, Regina." Gretchen says dismissively, ignoring everything I just said.

There's a hand on my shoulder, jolting me out of my thoughts. Aaron looks at me worriedly but retreats his arm. "Gina, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just-" I wipe away a strand of hair that's been matted to my face by tears. Wait-

-tears?

I use my sleeve to dry my face quickly. I didn't even realize I started crying. I was just so tired. I was supposed to feel safe around my friends. Even when the rest of the school sees me as an emotionless bitch I should be able to turn to my friends and be okay. I couldn't do what when my current number one source of fear has intruded into our group.

"So," Janis says awkwardly. "We don't tell our giants directly. How do we get them to see the side of Jason we're seeing?"

"We catch him in the act." Aaron suggests.

Janis shakes her head with a sigh. "I am tired and quite frankly sick. I don't want our plan 'a' to be; lets put ourselves in danger in hopes that our friends stop by to witness. Let's make that plan 'y' or 'z'."

"Well, we already have plans 'b' through 'z'. We need and 'a', I'm just spouting ideas." Aaron points out.

Janis sighs, shaking her head. "I should have stuck with Damian. I need a nap and maybe an Advil."

I chuckled dryly at the girl sitting across from me. "Always have your priorities sorted, huh Janis?"

"If my priorities include being sick and not wanting to deal with Jason ever again then yeah."

"It's getting harder and harder 'not to deal with Jason ever again'," Aaron pointed out. "Remember lunch last week?"

"Don't remind me." Janis huffed. 

Last week Jason decided to be a lot more careless with how he treated us around our giant friends. 

I cringe just thinking of the memory.

"All I'm saying is the tiny soccer team is so underfunded. We're even better than the giant soccer team but you wouldn't know it because we've set up to fail."

I raise my eyebrow as Aaron sits next to me, passionately explaining how he swears the tiny soccer team is not a total failure. 

I sat in front of Gretchen and across from Janis, who was flopped against Damian's forearm clearly struggling to stay awake.

I grin as she yawns. 

"Am I boring you, Janis?" Aaron teases.

"A little," Janis says with full honesty.

Before Aaron can remark, a stack of textbooks is dropped in between him and I, narrowly missing me as I push myself backward.

Jason.

Janis's eyes widen and I instantly rush around the textbook to make sure Aaron is okay. He is, just looks equally as shaken up as I do.

Jason sits in the seat between Damian and Gretchen without bothering to great the tinies he just nearly crushed. It's where Cady normally sits, but she isn't here today.

"Jason!" Gretchen grins, pecking him on the cheek like I didn't just almost die.

I throw and exasperated look to Janis who laughs at my expense. 

She wasn't the one almost fucking crushed.

Janis pushes off Damian's arm, making her way over to Aaron and I.

Or tries to.

She doesn't make it very far before shes intercepted by a hand scooping her up.

Janis makes a noise of surprise as Jason lifts her off the table without asking.

I push myself closer to Gretchen as Janis instantly tries to get back down to the table. Jason's thumb knocks her down and I cringe because- that looked like it hurt.

Damian eyes Jason wearily but doesn't vocally say anything. But neither does Janis so why would anyone worry? It's just Jason. Sweet Jason. The boy who's probably gonna ask Gretchen to spring fling. Innocent Jason.

Janis sits up again, clearly uncomfortable, as Damian speaks. "Maybe I should hold Janis?"

"No," Jason says simply before Janis can even open her mouth. "She's fine."

"Janis," Damian ignores the boy next to him. "Do you want Jason holding you?"

Janis is silent for a while, and I don't blame her.

She's in Jason's hands.

One wrong more and shes getting hurt-

badly.

"I- I uh, kinda want to be with Damian right now? If that's okay?" Janis speaks slowly, picking her words wisely.

"That's okay!" Jason reassures her sweetly, passing the girl to her giant. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." Aaron and Janis make an identical face of discussed at the sickly sweet tone and I can only assume my face is similar.

"It's okay." Janis says softly, visibly more relaxed in Damain's hands.

Jason forces a frown. "Well- I'll go give you space. Gretchen, I'll see you next period."

He gets up, walking away but I don't feel very bad for him. If anything, I feel safer. And if the collective breath of relief from Janis and Aaron was an indicator- they felt the same.

As soon as Jason was out of earshot, Gretchen turned to Janis. "Jason was just trying to be nice, Janis. You need to be willing to welcome him into our friend group."

Janis' jaw slacked. The 'are you kidding me' went unsaid. Instead, Janis forced out an "Of course, it's my fault." 

"I'm serious, Janis. Be nice." 

"I'm serious too." Janis shot back.

Aaron and I shared a look of helplessness. We couldn't just tell them. Our giants would never believe us.

To them, Jason could do no wrong.

"The only solution is to never go to lunch again." Janis speaks up, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Mhmm, sure. That's a reasonable solution." Aaron teases.

"You got something better, soccer boy?" Janis raises her eyebrow.

Aaron shakes his head. "We've reached a dead end. Gina? You got any ideas?"

I shake my head with defeat. "Unfortunately, no. All I know is Jason hates us and his goal is to make our friends hate us too through lying and manipulation."

"Go girl, give us nothing." Janis rolls her eyes. "We already knew that Regina."

"Okay, I get your sick and cranky, Janis, but I don't need you-"

"Okay!" Aaron interrupts me. "The three of us are stressed! We're worried. We're scared. But we're also all on the same page. Let's not go at each other's throats right now. We're the only ones who understand each other's struggles. Please stop fighting."

Janis and I both mumble a weak sorry. 

Aaron was right. We were all scared. Can you blame us? Jason was doing everything in his power to isolate us from our friends. For no other reason other then we're tinies and see-through his act. Why he wants Gretchen so bad is beyond me. But hell am I gonna let his toxic ass have her.

"Do you guys remember that scarf Gretchen wore last week?" I ask.

Janis tilts her head. "Yeah?"

"I don't pay enough attention." Aaron shrugs.

I grin. "Well, it was a baggy infinity scarf to refresh your memory. There was enough fabric that I could sit on Gretchen's shoulder next to her neck and not be seen. So I obviously skipped my boring history lecture. But also- Gretchen talked to Jason. He didn't know I was there."

"You're like a spy!" Janis grinned, invested in the story. "What happened?!"

"Hey, Gretchen!" Jason smiles, slipping his hand into Gretchen's as they walked down the hall.

I sunk lower into the pool of fabric, hopping Grethen didn't point out I was here.

"Hey, Jason!"

I let out a breath of relief when she doesn't.

"I have to ask you something," Jason asked.

My ears perk up as I wait for him to continue.

"Is that Janis girl always so- unfriendly? I get the feeling she doesn't like me. I just don't know why. Like Regina clearly doesn't like me very much but she might just be jealous you've got a boy and she doesn't-"

So that's where the seed of jealously in Gretchen's head was planted from. It takes all of me not the stand-up and call Jason out on his bullshit.

He continues.

"But I don't understand why Janis or Aaron wouldn't like me. Aaron just gets quiet and hey- maybe he's shy. But Janis lashes out every time I try and talk to her."

"Janis can be like that sometimes." Gretchen says, nodding in agreement.

Jason could tell her the earth is fucking flat and this bitch would nod in agreement.

I wouldn't be surprised if Gretchen is even really listening to what Jason is saying.

All she's thinking is 'hot boy's lips are moving'.

Ugh.

"At least he's caught onto the fact that I don't fucking like him." Janis crossed her arms.

"Janis, he's painting you to be the bad guy. He's trying to turn Gretchen against you, what don't you understand about that?" Aaron asked.

"Oh no, I understood. I just don't care. I hate Jason and I'm glad he's caught on."

"He hates you more." I point out.

"Impossible." Janis shook her head.

We go back and forth about who hates who more before settling on the fact that our collective hate for him outweighs anything he feels for us.

"Let's go meet our giants, it's getting late." Aaron said standing up. He holds out his hand, helping Janis up first, then me. 

Janis groans holding her head. "Still feel sick as fuck and standing up so fast did not help."

"Woe is you." I roll my eyes. "Let's go."

We walk through the school, making our way to the tiny pick up zone. We're halfway there as Aarons phone dings.

Its a text from Cady.

Aaron reads allowed: "Gretchen went home early so Karen is driving Regina home. Damian and Karen are still in after school help and I might be a bit late to pick you three up. Wait there for me, I swear I didn't forget about you guys."

I laugh. "Cady could never forget about us."

"I mean-" Janis starts. "There was the one ti-"

"Shut up." I cut her off. "Cady would never forget about her tiny friends."

We make it to the tiny pick up zone and sit against a wall to wait. It's no surprise that the hallway is empty. It's late after school on a Monday. Who would willingly still be in school?

There's footsteps down the hall and we all look up, expecting Cady.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Janis groans.

"Ever the pleasant one, Sarkisian." Jason jeers. 

"I'm tired, and sick, and will literally cry if you even touch me. I will bawl. And maybe bite. Don't come the fuck near me." Janis threatens, holding up a sharpened pencil like its a knife.

Jason doesn't seem intimidated by this action. "Whatcha gonna do? Nibble my finger?"

"Fuck off!" Janis whines, throwing her head back. "Literally any day but today."

"Listen whiney and friends. I just hear to pick you up for your friends. So stop being such a bitch Janis."

The friends that told us to 'wait here for Cady'?

Riiight.

I share a knowing look with Aaron while Janis gets up, making her way back into the tiny halls.

"Not fucking dealing with this. Good day asshole."

"Nope." Jason reaches forward, picking Janis off the platform. "You're coming with me bitch."

"This is kidnapping," Janis says flatly. She doesn't fight Jason or thrash. She looks tired, like death is appealing at this point. "I'm being abducted."

Jason's fingers tighten around her. "Thought you were the fisty one? Huh? Shane said you put up a pretty good fight. Where's the fight, Sarkisian?"

"You talked to Shane?" I gawk. I don't know why I'm surprised. They definitely seem like best friends.

"Can you put me the fuck down?" Janis huffs. "Kinda hard to breath."

"Oh, is it?" Jason said with feigned worry. "Shame."

Janis cried out as the hand around her tightened, and Jason grinned at the first real signs of fear Janis has shown yet.

"Put me down- asshole!" Janis wheezed. 

"Let go of her!" Aaron yelled.

It was moments like these when you really realize how helpless you were as a tiny. 

All I could do was sit and watch as Aaron yelled and Janis squirmed. All I could do was pray Cady or really anybody would walk past and see what's happening. 

Yeah, we've been threatened with death before.

Every tiny in Northshore has at least once.

And yeah, we've been pushed around before.

But I've never legitimately feared for my life of a friend's life.

I know maybe that's just a perk of being Regina Geroge, but this was new territory. And scary as fuck territory at that.

Jason seems pretty fucking pleased with himself and it makes my stomach twist. It's never gone this far before. 

Somebody is going to get really hurt.

And I can't do anything.

I can almost feel my heart stop as Janis goes limp. I can't see her face. 

But she's not fucking moving.

"Oh whoops." Jason shugs. "You tinies really are weak."

Aaron looks like if he could he'd fucking kill Jason.

Wouldn't we all.

"Put her down!" I yell, snapping out of my helpless funk.

Jason loosens his grip on Janis but she doesn't move. My breath feels caught in my throat. 

My eyes were trained on Janis and I didn't see Jasons another hand till his finger flicked into my side, sending me falling backward.

I felt like I was living through one of those dramatic fight scenes in the movies.

Expect isn't it the villains who are supposed to be defeated?

I'm curled into myself on the floor, Janis is knocked out in the literal hands of the enemy and Aaron looks ready to kill or cry, whichever is possible first.

Never thought I'd die in high school.

"Hey, Jason, is that you?" A voice calls from down the hall.

"Cady!" Aaron runs to the egde of the platform. 

Jasons condescending nature and snarl disappear. "Hello, Heron!"

"Is Janis asleep?" Cady asks as her eyes fall to Jason's hand. "She only ever falls asleep with Damian, either shes exhausted or really trust you."

The bitter laugh is out of my mouth before I can stop it. 

Cady looks at me and tilts her head. "Regina, why do you look like you've been crying on the floor?" She pauses, her eyes trailing back between the four of us. I can almost see the doubt set in her mind. Yes! "What's really going on here?" She asks. "And uh, I'm gonna take Janis-"

Jason shakes his head. "She's fine, it won't be necessary."

"No, I wasn't offering." Cady's voice is an unfamiliar cold. "I'll take Janis."

I stand up and make my way closer to Aaron as Cady takes Janis away from Jason. "Now, what the fuck is going on.

"Literally nothing, we're just talking and-"

"No! He's a fucking asshole and he-"

"Regina, what did I ever do to you?!"

"Are you kidding me?!" 

Cady looks between us nervously. "Uh, Aaron? Wanna tell me what's going on?"

"Gladly."

Cady steps over, picking both Aaron and I up. My mouth is still open from shock. 

What did I ever do to you?!

Fucking bitch, want me to list it?

"So uh," Aaron starts nervously. Cady cups her hands so I'm next to Janis who looks like she's beginning to stir but uh- I've never been suffocated before, maybe she's just sleeping at this point.

But she's breathing. It's reassuring enough for me.

"It started a couple months ago." Aaron continues. "Jason actually isnt very nice? To the tinies at least." He laughs nervously, leaning closer into Cady's hand and away from Jason, who isn't bothering to keep the nice facade up anymore. "He's actually like- Shane Omen but worse?"

"Worse?" Cady's jaw drops slightly in disbelief. 

"I mean- he held Janis so tight that she passed out so I'd fucking say so." I snark. 

Aaron nods. "Yeah, heh- like, I dunno. Just- not nice? He uh, flicked Regina, which is why she was laying down when you walked over. And like its not the first time he's done this? Especially when we're alone."

There's an unreadable look on Cady's face as she looks up to Jason.

It almost scares me.

"I'm gonna walk away. Just-" Cady gives a low laugh. "Jesus, I almost feel sorry for you, Jason. You deserve everything coming to you. Starting with Gretchen and Damian when they find out."

Despite everything, I can't help but smile at the way Jason's face falls with realization.

It's not a big secret that Gretchen loves an excuse to slap someone.

And this is hell of an excuse.

I look at Janis who is still laying next to me, breathing shallowly. 

We might have to bail Damian out of fucking jail.

Cady turns on her heels without saying another word to Jason and walks down the halls. Once he is out of earshot she looks down at us. "How long?!"

Aaron shrugs. "Since Gretchen first met Jason."

"That's like three months guys!" Cady looks genuinely heartbroken. "I can't believe we didn't notice."

Janis stirs next to me, weakly propping herself up. "Huh?"

There are tears in Cady's eyes as she stops walking. "You guy have been enduring this for three months?"

"No," I say. "Well- yes but not really. It was a build-up. He didn't just start attacking us to the point of death one random day. It started with little things. Like pushing us around and knocking us over."

"That shouldn't happen anyway!" Cady says sadly.

"But it did," Janis mumbled. She seems to have caught onto whats going on. "My chest hurts."

"I'm so sorry you guys," Cady whispers sadly. "I- how did we not notice?"

"Not notice what?"

I turn around to see Karen and Damian walking over. For a second my eyes trail behind them in search of Gretchen but- she went home. Of course.

"Cady, are you crying?" Damian asks, instantly worried. "Is everything okay? Where's Janis?"

"Right here, dude." Janis mumbles. She's looking down at her lap, her arms wrapped loosely around herself. She's still wheezing slightly and tears threaten to spill over her eyes. I don't blame her. That was almost death.

Janis almost died.

My breath hitches at the realization.

As a tiny, you almost die a lot. But- it's accidental. It's falling or almost being crushed. Never malicious actions of bigger peers. 

Cady offers her hands out and I step backward, letting Damian gently scoop up Janis. 

 "What happened?" Karen asks, peering over Damian's shoulder at Janis.

I look back to Cady trying to figure out if she's gonna talk or if Aaron and I have to explain. She's staring at Karen with a crestfallen gaze, tear tracks down her face. "Guys-" She starts. 

I know this is hard for her because she's taking it personally and blaming herself, but we really don't need the fanfare. 

Not that I'm gonna step up and tell the story. 

Karen steps towards picking up me and Aaron. Cady doesn't fight it, she just lets her hands fall to her side. "Y'know, Jason?"

"Yeah of course. Smile emoji." Karen says from above me.

I look over to Janis, who has her arm around Damain's finger. She's doing pretty well for passing out. God knows I'd be sobbing if that were me. Hell, the ache in my side is enough to make me want to cry right now.

"Not smiley face emoji, Karen," Cady explains softly. "I don't know the full thing, you're gonna have to ask the tinies but-"

Cady explains what she walked over to see and the minimal information she got out of us earlier. She left out a lot, but she didn't know a lot to be fair. The look of utter horror on our friend's faces almost made me feel bad. We barely scraped the top layer.

Damian is looking down at the girl in his hands who at some point in the bad retelling started crying again. Karen had held Aaron and I even closer and Cady looked ready to sit down and cry. Me too, Cady.  

"Three months?" Damian whispers weakly. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"Why would you believe us? Jason's fucking great." Janis said bitterly, still clinging to his finger.

"Of course we would believe you, Jan."

"Gretchen didn't." I say softly.

I didn't really think about what I was saying. I was just mumbling to myself. But Karen heard. 

"You told her?"

I shrug. "Tried to. She didn't listen."

"Well, she's gonna listen when we tell her tomorrow," Cady says. "I can't believe you didn't tell us."

I shrug dismissively, not wanting to talk about it. "It's not a big deal."

I didn't mean it. Of course, it's a big deal. But I said it wasn't anyway. 

"You're telling me Janis almost died today and it's not the first time you guys have been through something like that, but don't worry it's not a big deal?!"

I pause, looking at the three giants. This was Aaron, Janis and I's normal. It's what we went through every day. Yeah, it's shitty but we're used to it. I forget sometimes the giants don't understand the fact not getting shoved around is normal for us. Being threatened and made fun of for our size is just part of an average day.

"Can we continue this with Gretchen at lunch tomorrow? I don't want this conversation twice. I feel even crappier than I already did before and I just want to sleep." Janis speaks up from where Damian held her protectively close. 

"You all better tell us everything tomorrow." Cady says. 

"Cady are you taking Aaron or should I get these two home?" Karen asks.

-

"This was a really funny joke guys." Gretchen says from above me. Despite her words, her voice is void of all amusement.

"Yes, because we're the type to make jokes about our tiny friends almost dying." Damian deadpans. Janis is sitting on the table in front of him looking like she'd rather talk about anything other than this.

I don't blame her.

But this could finally be my chance to get Gretchen to listen and believe me.

"Gretchen." I turn around to look up at her, but I'm on the table I need to crane my neck. "I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you have to believe us. Cady witnessed it with her own eyes if you don't believe me. Janis sure as hell can vouch since she nearly fucking died yesterday."

Gretchen doesn't respond for a long time. I feel like I can see the seed of doubt settle in on the situation. She reaches forward, scooping me up and bringing me to her shoulder. 

"I- I'm not sure what to believe," She admits. "but I'll listen. I'm sorry I didn't do that before."

That one sentence felt like so much weight being lifted. Jason had Gretchen around her finger. His word was law and everyone else could fuck themself.

But not anymore.

I open my mouth to speak but get cut off by a familiar and unwelcoming voice.

"Hello everyone!"

Cady's eyes widen in disbelief. "You aren't actually stupid enough to think about sitting with us today, right Jason?"

"Aw, why not?" He asks, sitting next to Gretchen and slinging his arm over her shoulder.

I gasp as I'm knocked forward, gripping onto Gretchen's shirt underneath me as I try to stay on. 

Gretchen bats Jason's arm away and scoops me up. "Jason we were talking about something private maybe it's better you join us again later."

Jason's eyes narrowed, as he looked across the table. I sunk lower in Gretchen's hand as his eyes landed on me but he moved on without trying anything. I mean- obviously, Gretchen was right here but still. 

Cady's hand was resting wearily by Aaron if Jason tried something and Janis had been transported to Damian's pocket when I wasn't looking. How could Gretchen not pick up on how stressed we all are?

"What's wrong?" Jason asked, turning to Gretchen.

"It's nothing for you to worry about. I just-"

"Did I do something wrong?" Jason's face fell and I almost felt bad for him. Almost. He should pursue an acting career.

Gretchen looked at loss for what to say for a second before speaking up. "Where were you yesterday after school?"

Jason scoffed. "Whatever Cady said was a lie, Gretch."

"I-" Gretchen froze. "I didn't mention Cady."

Jason's eyes widened as he began to backtrack but- it was too late. 

"Jason I need you to leave, please." Gretchen's hand was shaking as she placed me gently on the table. "There are some things I need to rethink."

"You really believe those tinies?" Jason's face morphed into utter disgust.

The mask was off, the act was over. Karen reached over, tugging me away from Gretchen and Jason and closer to her. 

"I should have believed them a while ago, apparently." Gretchen snapped.

Jason rolled his eyes. "Please. They're just tinies. What makes them so trustworthy? Actually- what makes them worthy?"

Karen lets out a legitimate gasp from above me. Gretchen looks to me with an expression I can't read. My breath feels caught in my throat. I can't shake the feeling that this may be where I lose my best friend. 

But she looks back at Jason. "I can't believe you really just asked that. Did you think that would help your point? What made you think- oh this will totally get Gretchen on my side? What is wrong with you?"

Jason looks dumbfounded at Gretchen's outburst. "Gretchen-"

I knew it was coming, so it was no surprise as Gretchen raises her arm, and a loud smack echos through the cafeteria over all the oblivious conversations. Jason gasps, his hand shooting up to his cheek. "You fucking bitch-"

"You have treated my friends awfully for too long. Go fuck off and find somewhere else to sit for lunch." Gretchen says simply, turning away from Jason.

Jason doesn't say anything as he looks across the table one last time. Aaron was still on the table but Cady had her hand cupped around him defensively, Damian's hand rested over his chest pocket and Janis gripped onto his finger. Karen had pulled against her arm where I sat pushed away as far away from Jason as possible. It was pretty clear he wasn't wanted here.

"Whatever." He bitterly admits defeat, pushing away from the table and walking away. Gretchen watched him leave before turning to me, wide-eyed.

"I can't believe I didn't believe you." She said sadly. "I can't believe I didn't believe any of you." I hold my arms out and Gretche complies, reaching over to scoop me up. "Regina, I'm so sorry."

I don't try and stop the tears that burn in my eyes as Gretchen holds me close to her.

We still have a lot to talk about after this but-

I've finally won after a long and painful battle. All our giants are awake and no longer oblivious to the suffering. 

I'm safe.

I cling to Gretchens's shirt as the tears poor over my eyes. Gretchen shakes and I realize- she's crying too.

I wouldn't be surprised if I turned around and the whole table was.

Jason was an asshole. He manipulated his way into the friend group and made my life miserable. Plus Janis and Aaron too, I guess. But he's gone now.

We don't have to worry anymore.

We're okay.

It will be okay.

2.5/10 not my best work but fun to write @realmisspolarbear @smallsoysauce @musicallygt

[writing-radionoises]

attraction

ship: shin soukoku / akuatsu, kunikidazai 

genre: slow burn romance

prompt: akutagawa is pining and has no idea what to do about it

notes: ada akutagawa, sequel to satisfaction 

It’s been at least a month since the announcement of Dazai and Kunikida’s wedding, a month since Ryunosuke left that dreaded anonymous love letter on Atsushi’s desk.

And yet, Atsushi has not figured out who wrote the love letter. Or maybe he did, and Akutagawa just didn’t know, or maybe Atsushi is even avoiding him…

God knows, all Akutagawa knows is that he’s locked in the bathroom on his former mentor’s wedding day while Atsushi bangs on the door.

“Ryunosuke, you are coming to the wedding, you fucking lawnmower!” He yells from outside.

Akutagawa puts his head into his hands. He’s ready, he changed up his normal top to a short sleeve white blouse without ruffles, it revealed all his scars and bruises, but it was a cute top that Atsushi picked out. Atsushi even tied his tie, fixed his hair, and everything, but here he was, insecure once again.

“He probably doesn’t even want me there…” Akutagawa responded from the bathroom.

“Then why would Dazai-san invite you?” Kyouka said from outside the bathroom, her tone much softer than Atsushi’s.

Ryunosuke had actually forgotten she was there…

Atsushi sighed, “Even if he didn’t want you at his wedding, which he does, I would want you there. Ryuu-san, pleeease!”

… The truth is, Akutagawa could never say no to Atsushi, especially when Atsushi uses his personal nickname for Akutagawa.

The sound of it alone brings color to Akutagawa’s sickly pale face.

“... Okay,” Akutagawa hesitantly agrees, fixing the little cat hair clip in his hair before unlocking the door to the bathroom and opening it.

Atsushi is in a similar outfit to his agency wear, a short sleeve white button up with the addition of a bowtie instead of a typical tie, as well as tan suspenders instead of black.

Kyouka, on the other hand, is wearing something a little more fancy than Akutagawa and Nakajima, simply because she’s the flower girl. Her dress is a tank top, knee length white dress with a dark blue lace collar, a dark blue ribbon around her waist as well. Atsushi has placed a flower crown of blue hydrangeas on her head, as well.

… She’s quite adorable.

“Are we ready to go?” Kyouka asks.

The trio leave the apartment, and make their way towards Fukuzawa’s house.

--

It’s awkward. It’s horribly awkward for Akutagawa. It’s such a small wedding, it’s really only the agency there, with the addition of some guild members, Gin, Higuchi, and a small appearance from Chuuya before he quickly leaves.

Akutagawa had never felt so much relief seeing Chuuya leave.

He ends up sitting next to his sister and Higuchi, Gin wearing a dress Akutagawa had bought her for her sixteenth birthday a few months ago, and Higuchi wearing a simple suit as they watch Kunikida and Dazai.

Fukuzawa got ordained specifically for this wedding, and probably only this wedding. So, up at the altar are Fukuzawa, Dazai, Kunikida, Atsushi, and Ranpo.

There wasn’t a need for a whole set of groom’s men, so the two best men were picked out and left at that.

… Akutagawa found it hard to look at anything but Atsushi. Looking at anybody else made him feel awkward and out of place.

… But Atsushi was a safe ground, the reason Akutagawa went to this event in the first place.

If it was hard to not look at Atsushi, it was even more difficult to not imagine being up at the altar with him. Declaring vows, holding hands, kissing… It made Ryunosuke giddy, feeling his face heat up.

Kyouka poked fun at him earlier about it, saying that him and Atsushi were probably going to be married next.

It’d be so nice… Akutagawa thought, But I don’t think he thinks of me in that way.

Pining is awful, so Akutagawa has discovered. It’s fucking painful.

When the reception starts, Akutagawa makes a run to the bathroom and locks himself in a stall for at least 30 minutes.

He washes his hands and hand at least ten times, as if trying to wash away the thoughts of Atsushi.

They don’t leave.

--

Akutagawa is sitting at a table at the reception awkwardly, watching Kyouka and Atsushi dance from a distance with some others when Dazai approaches, taking a seat beside Akutagawa.

“You don’t look like you’re having a lot of fun, huh?” Dazai starts.

“... I’m having a hard time with feelings, but congratulations on your marriage. Please don’t let my feelings concern you,” Ryunosuke replied, looking back over at Dazai, “It’s supposed to be a happy day for you.”

Dazai smiles a bit, shaking his head. His attire isn’t much different outside of the flowers in his hair, and a new brooch on his chest. His coat has been forsaken somewhere, probably Kunikida’s car.

“Thank you, but your feelings won’t upset me. I know they don’t have a whole ton to do with me,” answered the brunette, “Your feelings have to do with the kitty cat over there, huh?”

Ryunosuke blushed, looking away from Dazai, “Don’t tell him.”

Dazai lets out a fake gasp, putting a hand to his chest, “Ah, I would never! For this is a Romeo And Juliet tale, a beautiful romance written by Shakespear himself! And yet, I am just a supporting character for sir Romeo.”

“If it wasn’t your wedding day, I would kick your ass.”

Dazai chuckles, “You should, anyway. But anyways, I hope things go well for you, blah, blah, blah, all the other shit you’ve probably already heard. You need anything?”

Akutagawa fell silent, shrugging as he looked back at Atsushi, smiling and laughing with Junichiro.

“I think I know what you need,” Dazai responds, standing up from his seat as he holds his arms out to Akutagawa, “A good, old fashion Dazai hug!” Akutagawa smiles a bit as he stands up, taking the hug from Dazai as he rests his head on his former mentor’s shoulder.

… Dazai’s hugs aren’t nearly as nice as Atsushi’s, but it feels nice to finally get attention from Dazai after all these years.

--

Fuck it, tiger lilies, Akutagawa thought, quickly pointing to them on the menu for the cashier to place the order. He paid for the flowers, and was given a date to pick up the flowers as Akutagawa left the flower shop, pulling out his phone and beginning to dial a familiar number.

“Kunikida Doppo speaking, what can I do for you?”

“How did you tell Dazai-san you liked him?

Kunikida sighed from the other end of the phone while Akutagawa starts his walk down to the train station, “Not even a hello?”

“Hello, Kunikida, how did you tell Dazai-san you liked him?” Ryunosuke quickly rephrased.

“Well, it’s difficult to say because I truly didn’t end up telling him.”

“So he was the one who confessed?” “In a way, yes. We are talking about Osamu here, he already figured out that I loved him through his connections to just about everyone in Yokohama. So what happened was Osamu invited me to dinner, told me he knew about my feelings, and that he returned them. We started dating shortly afterwards,” Kunikida explained.

“Ah, you had it easy... “ Akutagawa replied, nervously tapping his fingers on his knee, “... I can’t seem to get my love interest to pick up on my feelings. They’re oblivious.”

“Hmm, you’re in a tough spot, then.”

“I don’t know who to go to anymore… I’ve spoken to Dazai-san, Higuchi, my sister, now you…” Akutagawa sighed, “It seems like no matter what, they can’t seem to figure it out, and I don’t want to be super blunt about it either… That’s just embarrassing.”

Kunikida fell silent, “I have an idea. To understand someone who is oblivious, you should talk to someone who was oblivious. You should talk to Poe, Ranpo’s boyfriend, they were in a similar situation. Poe might be able to give you some advice.”

Akutagawa smiles a bit as his train arrives to get back to the agency, “Thank you, Kunikida, I’ll get to it. I have to go, have a good afternoon.”

--

“Jinko, please think about this for more than five seconds. Please,” Ryunosuke says sadly, watching Atsushi pause from walking into their shared kitchen with the tiger lillies Akutagawa had just bought for him.

Atsushi turns back to him, “Think about what?”

Ryunosuke feels himself freeze up, trying to quickly come up with a response before eventually stuttering something out, “N, nevermind. Don’t think about it.”

Atsushi gives him a strange look, and then shrugs as he goes to put the flowers in the vase, and Ryunosuke goes to make some tea. His heart aches as Akutagawa pulls down a tea bag, then coughing into his hand.

“You look upset,” Atsushi comments, standing besides Akutagawa. Akutagawa hadn’t even noticed that his face was scrunched up into something of hurt. It’s understandable, but now was not a good time for that.

“... Do you have any idea how long I’ve been trying to tell you this? You just keep brushing me off, if you don’t like me, please just say it,” he replied, the words fell out of his mouth without a thought. The moment he said it, Ryunosuke felt a wave of regret wash over him as he quickly tried to distract himself, continuing to make his tea.

There’s a moment of silence. Akutagawa can’t bear to even look at Atsushi, so scared of his response, scared to burst into tears just by looking at the other.

“... Ryunosuke. I like you a lot, you are my very best friend. I don’t know what you’re trying to say, though, and I can tell it’s hurting you,” Atsushi replied, his voice is calm and full of worry, “What are you trying to say?”

“Think about it. Just… Think about it, please, Atsushi. I’ve been so obvious, practically the whole agency knows,” Akutagawa pauses to rub his eyes on his sleeve.

Atsushi reaches out and places a hand on Akutagawa’s shoulder, spinning his friend around to look at him. Akutagawa’s eyes are watering as he holds his entire cup in his hand, then setting the cup down on the counter.

“Do you just… Not get it? What else do I have to do? Jinko, this is fucking ridiculous, we’ve been doing this for months now. Are you really this dense?” Ryunosuke said, to which Atsushi fell silent, not responding.

Akutagawa didn’t know what to say, just staring intently at Atsushi with his heart pounding when Atsushi reached out for Akutagawa, cupping his face in his hands and bringing their lips towards in a swift motion.

Ryunosuke is left in shock for a moment, he had never really kissed someone before. Higuchi kissed his cheek once, though that might be the most he’s ever gotten.

… Regardless, it’s nice. Akutagawa quickly relaxes against Atsushi, moving his hand over the one Atsushi has on his face.

And when Atsushi pulls away, Akutagawa has to resist from pulling him back into the kiss. Atsushi smiles at Akutagawa, he is still holding the other’s hand as he speaks.

“Was I right?”

Ryunosuke nodded, “Yes, you were.”

“I didn’t think you actually liked me back,” replied Atsushi.

“... Please say you’re joking.”

“I wish I was.”

Akutagawa chuckles, hiding his smile behind his hand, “Jinko, you are dense.”

Atsushi smiles once again as he pulls the other into a hug, “Yup!”

… They are not going to hear the end of this from Dazai.

[veliseraptor]

one of several prompts from @the-mundivagant for Tony’s POV of his deteriorating Loki feelings, and dang this one was fun. 

this is war (a warning to the prophet, the liar, the honest), 1.5k, tony stark pov, remember this cold verse

He was standing on a shattered rock in space. His right arm was broken, his armor dented so it was hard to move. Dust - ash - choked him, but what held him frozen were the bodies strewn around him, lying like broken dolls. All of them. Thor, Natasha, Clint. Steve, Bruce. Rhodey.

And one person still standing, head cocked to the side and one eyebrow quirked. Half smiling, greyish-green eyes cold.

“Always the last one standing,” Loki said. “While better men die.”

“You,” Tony snarled, and brought one arm up to fire a repulsor, but Loki flicked his wrist lazily and his armor just - shut down. Like it had in Naples.

“You broke so easily, in the end,” Loki said almost lazily. “You thought you could tame me.” His eyes flicked toward Steve, the shield shattered, his eyes staring blankly at the sky. “He did. But I never was.

“All I ever wanted was to watch the universe burn.”

Tony woke up gasping, his heart racing. He glanced to the other side of the bed, but Pepper was gone; she was gone a lot lately. He rubbed his hands down his face. The same nightmare. It kept coming back.

He rolled out of bed and went down to the lab.

It hadn’t been some kind of vision or foretelling. Tony wasn’t stupid, and he didn’t believe in fortunetelling. But. But.

Loki had always been dangerous. He’d known that from the get-go, like all of them had known it, except maybe Steve who had too big a heart for his own good. But then it’d sort of...faded away into the background, the longer Loki lived in their midst seemingly doing nothing but keeping to himself and seducing Steve Rogers. The constant vigilance had eased and they’d all started acting like it was just...normal. They’d all bought into it, that Loki’d turned over a new leaf, made a change.

What was that saying about leopards and spots?

Tony remembered looking at the first report of a HYDRA base, everyone in it dead. He’d looked through the photographs, and all right, he wasn’t going to cry about a bunch of crypto-Nazis getting what they deserved, but as the reports rolled in and the body count rose Tony was very suddenly staring at the realization that they had no idea what Loki was capable of. They’d never had any idea what he was capable of. They didn’t know a single fucking thing about what Loki could do.

In New York, Tony realized, they’d barely scratched the surface. For whatever reason, and it was a question Tony had periodically worried at over the years, Loki had barely even tried. He could’ve killed Tony on the spot using his bare hand rather than throwing him out the window. He could have torn Steve to shreds in Germany.

Very suddenly, Tony had remembered when HYDRA had gone after Steve in D.C. and he’d been trying to stop Loki from going after him, the way that for just a second Tony had thought Loki would attack him. If Bruce hadn’t been there…

The ease in Naples when Loki had shut down his armor like swatting a fly.

All the nightmare had done was remind Tony of what he should’ve thought of before. The first time around, Loki hadn’t attacked them head on, not at first. No, he’d weaseled his way into their midst and tried to rip them apart from within. It hadn’t worked, but then they’d known not to trust him. Now…

And now they knew there was some other player. Something bigger and nastier, and Loki’d been working with him before, and how did they know, how did they know that he wouldn’t do it again to save himself?

They couldn’t. They didn’t.

Tony unlocked one of the storage lockers with his fingerprint and pulled out the device inside. There hadn’t been much left of Doom’s castle when Thor was done with it, and originally Tony had just gone looking to make sure there was nothing anyone else could use, because Doom was psychotic and they didn’t need another one of those picking up where he’d left off. Some things he had gotten rid of without saying anything.

Other things...something had held him back, and Tony thought now it’d been some instinct, you might need this. He’d modified it, adapted it. The first real trial had been with the scepter, seeing whether he could keep it hidden because damned if he was letting Loki get close to it again. It wasn’t like he could test it in the other direction, the one they might really need.

He hadn’t told anyone. Maybe he could trust Natasha to keep it to herself, to understand, but even she’d been softening. It seemed better to keep it secret, keep it in reserve, a weapon he’d hopefully never need.

If Steve knew…

No. Much as he wanted to, Tony couldn’t trust Steve. Not with this.

Lately he wondered if he could trust Steve with anything. He wanted to, but between Barnes and Loki…

Too big a heart for his own good. And Loki had slithered his way into it.

Tony looked down at his work and thought again the question he always had when he woke up from that nightmare.

If it came down to it, would we be able to stop him?

**

It was amazing, really amazing, how quickly everything could go to shit.

Twenty-four hours and Steve had gone rogue, the Winter Soldier was on the loose - with Loki, to boot, Tony didn’t know anyone else who could break metal like that - and the Avengers had splintered into fucking factions. Oh, and apparently the wonder twins had beaten up Vision and bolted, too. With Clint’s help.

Yeah, this was just going great.

It didn’t get better from there, in part, thanks, Ross, to the untimely intervention of soldiers interrupting his attempt to talk Steve off a ledge. On the bright side, his anti-magic weapon worked, and Vision knocked Loki flat. On the less bright side, Steve and Barnes slipped away in the confusion. Oh, yeah, and Natasha had Tasered the King of Wakanda so they could.

Three-quarters of the (former) Avengers in custody. Ross called to congratulate him, and Tony just felt vaguely ill.

“What’re you going to do with them,” he asked, rubbing the massive bruise on his chest where Loki had punched him. “You’re just holding them, right?”

Ominous silence.

“Let me rephrase that,” Tony said. “You’re just holding them. For trial. They’re US citizens, Ross, you can’t just-”

“Barton, Wilson, and Lang are,” Ross interrupted. “The Maximoffs aren’t.”

“They’ve got visas. They’re here legally.” Sort of. “And they’re Avengers, too.”

“Not anymore.”

Asshole. “They’re not threats now. You can keep them contained without hurting them.” He paused. “Sokovia loves them. Word gets out that anything’s happened to them…”

Ross grunted. Good enough, Tony thought. Maybe optimistically.

Oh, yeah. And then there was the other thing.

“And what about Loki?” Silence, again. “Jesus. You haven’t already killed him, have you?” Fuck. That would be - really bad. Wherever Thor was, if he got back and found out Loki’d been executed…

Tony wouldn’t bet on Ross living for long.

He didn’t think Thor would stop there, either. He’d go looking for whoever’d sent Loki to his death, and yeah, Tony was pretty sure he knew who that’d be.

“No,” Ross said.

“So what are you planning to do?”

Quiet for a moment. “I understand,” Ross said, “that the research potential-”

“Oh, fuck no,” Tony said. Loki was dangerous, Loki was bad news, but Ross said research potential and Tony was back in Latveria with Loki looking like he’d gone three rounds with a freshman anatomy course.

“You don’t give me orders, Mr. Stark.”

“No,” Tony said, talking fast, “but I can give you suggestions, and let me tell you before you start sharpening your knives that the last person who tried that? Name rhymed with ‘boom’ which was about the noise it made when Thor demolished his castle and smashed his head in. And yeah, say whatever you want about Thor being bound to the Accords, but he hasn’t signed yet and he’s not exactly the most restrained person, so unless you really want to get up close and personal with that hammer of his, I’m going to recommend you stop thinking about ‘research potential.’”

“I don’t appreciate being blackmailed,” Ross said after a long moment.

“It’s not blackmail. Just honesty.” Tony tapped his fingers on his leg. “Do whatever the hell you want with him otherwise, I don’t care. But don’t kill him. I’m thinking of me as much as you, here.”

Ross hung up without agreeing. Tony stared out the window.

Goddammit, Steve.

“Tony Stark,” said Vision’s voice, and he turned around hard.

“What,” he said, maybe a little bitterly. “Are you leaving too?”

“No,” Vision said after a moment. It was hard to tell, but he seemed miserable. Guess even androids can feel like rotten traitors.

This isn’t your fault.

“Then what,” Tony snapped.

“There is...something I need to tell you,” he said. “I should have told you before, but...Steve Rogers asked me not to.”

Tony narrowed his eyes. “Did he now.”

“It has to do with Loki.”

Oh, Tony thought, listening. Oh, fuck.

Anger boiled up. Steve, you selfish fucking idiot.

At least he didn’t feel guilty anymore.

[smolfangirl]

Where hitting a wall takes you

First and foremost, a huge Thank you to @ac-ars for kickstarting my inspiration and the dialogue and to @sky-girls for more shameless teasing ideas and just for being my first reader!

This was a lot of fun to write and also got a bit long with 4.5k words but oh well, who cares anyway? I hope you enjoy this!

Prompt: “I’m your roommate’s friend and I have an extra key but clearly my friend did not tell you about that so now I’m pinned against a wall because you think I’m a murderer and holy shit, where do you take martial arts?” (seen during Simbarficweek planned by @sky-girls)

Matteo expected a lot of things to happen. For example, serving as Gastón’s delivery boy at some point, because his best friend was in love and therefore not as accountable as he used to be. In return, there were things Matteo never expected. Like ending up against a wall, consumed by complete darkness in a situation that couldn’t be further from any romantic context.

He had no idea who his attacker was.

Their arms blocked his shoulders. His back was jammed into the cold wallpaper, supported by the weight of a body. Adrenaline rushed through his blood. The pressure on his chest made it hard to breathe. He wanted to get out, get away. Desperately. But he didn’t know how to do it, not even how to think clearer.

“Who are you and what do you want?”, a female voice cut through the silence, sharp and confident.

“I’m Gastón’s best friend, he wanted me to pick up some text books for him”, Matteo panted, already losing breath.

“How did you get in?” Yeah, that girl, woman, whatever, didn’t sound as if she would let him go anytime soon. Who was she?

Matteo tried to remember anything that helped him figure out who she was. And what she was doing here in a presumed empty flat.

The roommate! It took him a moment to remember that both Gastón and Nina had brought up another girl who lived here.

Great, he thought, was this how he’d meet Nina’s best friend? First impressions were important and of all things, he apparently had messed this one up. “Spare key”, he coughed.

Finally, her grip loosened. Oxygen flooded his lungs and he let out a relived sigh. “Ugh, that’s so much better”, he murmured. The lights flickered on with no warning, freezing him for the blink of a moment. Next thing, he saw her.

By the stars, she’s cute.

Big green eyes. They drew him in, deep, deeper, until he shook his head and broke away. Soft brown curls fell over her shoulder, framing her cheeks that were tinted with a notion of pink. And her lips. Her lips sparked an idea where he casually picked her up and found out how she liked being up against the wall.

Matteo undeniably liked what he saw, without even knowing her name, knowing anything.

However, what he said was something entirely different. “Wow, that must be the most embarrassing moment in my life, you are so tiny.” The girl raised her eyebrows. “Isn’t that a bit presumptuous for you to say?”

“Presumptuous? Isn’t that a big word coming from someone as small as you?” He had no idea what he was saying, or how his mouth worked faster than his brain. 

“Already talking big again?”, the girl countered with both eyebrows raised, “Do you like being slammed against the wall or something?”

“Well, first of all, that really was kinda hot, and yeah, I do. Though under different circumstances if I’m being honest.” Okay, he should stop. Now. He didn’t need her to defy him a second time. Yet, something about her fried his thoughts and took away his self-control. Or was that just the left-over adrenaline?

She blushed. This time, he got to watch the color spreading out beneath her skin and all he wanted right then was to see it over and over again. Not long and he’d need a pinhole to look at… what was her name? How hadn’t he asked her yet but already teased her as if his life depended on it?

He searched for a memory of the few times Nina mentioned her. Nothing, not even a hint. By the time he decided to ask her straight away, she had recovered from her unease: “Do you always break into other people’s houses and then act like the biggest snob who ever walked on this earth without even introducing yourself? Or is that just for today?”

“I wasn’t breaking into your house, I had a key”, he protested. She grinned at his offended tone. “But if you are so keen on getting to know me, I’m Matteo. Matteo Balsano.”

“Okay, well, just to make this clear, Matteo” – he took in a deep breath when his name came across her lips. She gave it a new sound, one he never knew he was searching for. 

He coughed. 

How ridiculous. She shouldn’t have such an effect on him, especially when he met her, like what, not even five minutes ago. “I was not keen on getting to know you. I just don’t like rude people, and even less when they’re in my home.”

“Let me rephrase that: you tell me I’m rude for trying to do my best friend a favor but if I recall correctly, you’re the one who nearly strangled me and hasn’t apologized? Or told me her name yet? Again, I’m the rude one?”

Matteo leaned back against the wall, satisfied with himself. It was the perfect setup to ask for her name without seeming suspicious or worse, desperate. The growing intensity of her widened green eyes on him was a nice bonus. 

“I’m Luna”, she stammered. Her fingers messed with her hair, tugging and fidgeting. His attention jumped from the strand falling in her face to her eyes, only to get caught up on her mouth. Luna. How beautiful.

“And I didn’t mean to strangle you, you just scared me. A lot. I didn’t want to hurt you, like, on purpose!”

“It’s okay, Luna. I guess at least now I know who Nina is living with.”

“Wait!”, Luna interrupted and by the grin on her face he already expected nothing good, “So, you said Gastón is your best friend?”

He felt like he should run away as fast as possible because she didn’t look cute anymore, but outright mischievous. “Oh no”, Matteo whispered in his realization, more afraid than when she had pushed him against the wall. “Don’t tell him, please, he’ll never let me live that down!” The corners of her mouth only curled up further. “I… I’ll do anything you want, anything, I’m begging you, just please, please don’t tell him!”

She laughed. Or giggled, in any way he wondered how someone so adorable could pose this much of a threat. Twice even, in barely a few minutes. How did she do that?

Her hands supported her chin and with her gaze wandering through the room, she pretended to consider his offer: “Anything, wow, that’s really generous, give me a minute, I have to think about this…” Then she turned to him. “Well, I haven’t had dinner yet and Gastón did mention your self-made-pizza is great.”

“I guarantee you it’s not the only great thing about me.”

As soon as the words were out in the air, Matteo wondered if his mouth would ever have mercy on him or if Luna kicked him out first. Maybe he should punch himself and see if that helped. He shouldn’t lose control like that, and surely not around a girl he just met.

“Right now, I just want pizza”, she replied with a wink. Damn, this girl is something else.

“Smart”, he heard himself say, “Saving the rest for later.”

First, her expression shifted. Not smiling anymore, not somewhat relaxed but focused. Serious. Her body tensioned up. She came closer, captured his attention. And yet, it took Matteo painfully long to realize she threatened to repeat the first minutes of their encounter. He stepped back, hands lifted in surrender. What if he had gone too far?

To his surprise, Luna immediately relaxed to let out another laugh. “Aww, you’re afraid of me!”

“I’m not!”, he argued. It was a losing battle, of course. “Well, eh, I could start with the pizza now? If you show me the kitchen?”

Luna stood on her toes, arm stretched all the way to her fingertips as she reached for the baking tray hidden on the upper shelf. The view fascinated Matteo, to say the least. Her top shifted, which gave him the perfect perspective on the soft curve of her waist. An image formed in his mind, of his arms wrapped around her, of his hand exploring her skin and of finding out how to awaken this beautiful smile of hers.

She seemed oblivious to all of it, not that it bothered him.

“You know, you could just ask for my help.” Now jumping up and down, she sounded a bit out of breath: “I’m good, nearly got it!” An amused snort slipped through his lips. “Yeah, I can see that. Hey, it’s okay, really, just say the word, even if you’re kind…”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence. With a blaring rattle, the tray found its way down the shelf – to the ground. “See?”, Luna exclaimed. “I told you I don’t need your help. You were saying?”

“Well before you decided to give me a heart attack with that move, I was about to say you look cute when you jump up and down like a yo-yo.”

She didn’t disappoint him when she picked up the tray with her cheeks heating up. “It’s not my fault you’re easily startled.”

“Me, easily startled?”, he laughed, “You wish. I’m just saying you were the one who freaked out and slammed me against a wall.” He checked the ingredients Luna had gathered on the table, so when her eyes found her again, the phone in her hand surprised him. The spark in her eyes too. “Just so you know, I could call Gastón right now…”

Matteo gave up. “Okay, okay, I got it, I will shut up.” Unfortunately for him Luna saw how his lips moved as he started to prepare the dough. “What did you say?”, she demanded.

He lifted his head, discovering her directly next to him. It should make him uncomfortable, at least a bit, no? Instead he felt like he’d been making his pizza while teasing her to no end for all his life. Like this was where he was meant to be.

He cleared his throat. He obviously lost his mind. “Nothing.” However, one look at the determination in Luna’s eyes, her raised eyebrow and her unlocked phone changed his mind. “Fine, I said you’re like an angry puppy.” She nodded. “Good. Because I am. And remember: angry puppies bite.”

“Would be my pleasure.”

Silence.

“You know, I liked you better against the wall”, she rolled her eyes. “Trust me, I’m certain I’d like you more against the wall too.”

Matteo stole a quick glance at Luna. Her eyes twitched, but the corners of her mouth did too. If he had to guess he’d say that she realized no matter what she replied now, it would inevitably give him another opportunity to tease her. Have some mercy on her, Balsano.

“How come you know martial arts?”, he changed the topic, holding back the smirk that tried to get a hold on him. With a sigh of relief, Luna hopped on the counter, soon with her legs dangling back and forth.

“You said it yourself, I’m small. I need to know how to defend myself.” A little break in which she followed his every move. “And how come you know how to make pizza from the scratch?”

“I’m Italian, it was kinda inevitable. Do you want me to show you?”

Midway through he realized his mistake. It was a family recipe, not meant to be shared with anyone else. Not even with Gastón, who begged Matteo every single time, for years and years, never successfully. Yet here he stood, about to tell this girl every little detail. This girl, Luna. What happened with him?

Luna brought him back to reality when she clapped her hands: “Yes, please!” But within a few seconds her face fell, the smile disappeared and she got back on her feet. “Wait, no, actually I can’t.”

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“I forgot I have this assignment I still need to finish, so I’m gonna let you and your pizza alone. My pizza? Ours? Whatever, I’m in the living room.” Just like that, she stormed out, leaving a baffled Matteo behind.

He decided that he needed to calm down. Get back to normal, clear his mind from the weird effect Luna had on him. During the last half an hour he discovered a side of him he neither knew nor could control. And the routine of focusing on the pizza – taking care of the dough, handling the tomato sauce, cutting all the ingredients spread out in front of him – helped him.

Slowly, his heartbeat turned back to normal. Now, that’s better.

A groan ripped through the silence. Out of nowhere, followed by a second one, even more loaded with frustration. Matteo let the knife in his hands fall on the chopping board. “Luna, are you okay?”, he yelled, already washing his hands to go check on her. A half-heartedly “Yes” followed, which didn’t convince him.

He found her on the couch, multiple textbooks and notebooks in front of her. She had tied up her hair into a messy ponytail, while she chewed mercilessly on a pencil. Somehow, the pout on her face made her look even more adorable.

“What’s the matter, munchkin?” He cowered down, trying to figure out what she was reading.

“Why do you call me that?” Matteo shrugged. “Well, because I’m still not over how small you are.”

He smirked at her annoyed look, although he was wise enough to cover it up before she noticed.

“I was tall enough to fix you against the wall”, Luna clarified, “So if I were you, I’d watch that attitude.”

Before he could answer – That reminds me, one day you need to show me these moves – her stomach growled. Loud. And a second, longer time. “Okay, message received loud and clear”, he laughed, “You said you had to do an assignment? Give me five minutes to put the pizza in the oven and then I’ll help you, okay?”

When he walked back into the living room, her eyes stuck on him like glue.

“Did you set the timer?”, Luna wanted to know. He snorted in response, as if it was the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard. “I don’t need a timer. I feel it. And I never burned a single pizza in my life. So, why don’t you tell me what you need help with?”

There was a first time for everything, right?

“Matteo…”, Luna softly tapped him. He leaned against the couch, focused on the notes she’d handed him, not fully aware of their knees slightly touching. “Hm?”

Her fingers on his arm again, wandering over his skin. Promptly, all his attention shifted to her. When he looked up, he found the green sea in front of him.

“Am I wrong or does something smell burned to you?”

One second, two, three. Matteo blinked, confused. Then it clicked. “Oh no, no no!” He jumped up and sprinted to the kitchen, nearly tripping over his own two feet.

It was too late. What he got out of the oven wasn’t a perfectly baked pizza but a pathetic, crusted shadow. A disgrace.

Footsteps followed him. Next, he felt Luna lurking over his shoulder while he stared at his failure. “An Italian burning pizza, can you believe it? This is definitely not my day.”

“Oh, Matteíto, if it makes you feel better, I won’t mock you for that. Or tell Gastón”, she comforted him, “However, there is a question I need to ask before your grief won’t let you think straight.” He turned his head, still somewhat in shock, only to find her face, her lips, unexpectedly close. She nearly hugged him, that’s how close she stood. Her perfume lingered in his nose, adding to the incoherent mess in his head.

He snapped back. He needed to concentrate on the matter at hand. “What question?”

“What about our deal? You promised me pizza?” Matteo sighed, taking one more look at the burned pizza. “Looks like delivery pizza has to be enough for today… but next time I’ll make you as much as you can eat, I promise.”

“How do you feel about pineapple on pizza?”

They were back on the couch, the menu of Luna’s preferred delivery service in front of them and Matteo wondered how this girl managed to continuously surprise him. Just not for good this time. “I don’t care what you eat when I’m not around, but under my watch no one abuses pizza like this. Fruit on pizza, tzz.”

“Tomato is a fruit too.” 

He shot her a glare. “I take that as a No”, Luna smiled, making it hard for Matteo to be seriously mad about her question. Instead, he fought the impulse to stick out his tongue at her. “What kind of pizza was yours supposed to be? So I can order that one.”

“They won’t have this one”, he explained, pride resonating in his tone, “It’s a special family recipe. Pizza Balsano, so to speak.” For some moments, Luna simply looked at him, this cute smile on her lips and Matteo wondered how he ended up being so fond of it so soon.

In a swift movement, Luna sat up, causing her ponytail to loosen until some strands fell back into her face. “Oh, they have a Pizza Mexico!”

“Isn’t that a bit too hot for you?”, Matteo snitched the menu out of her hands. “I’m Mexican, we love hot things. Also, I dealt with you too so far.” As soon as Luna realized what she had said, she clasped her hands over her mouth. The subtle pink reappeared on her cheeks.

Forgotten was the piece of paper in his hands. Matteo leaned closer, making sure she returned his look. Then he winked, “Fair point, munchkin”, and increased the space between them again when her cheeks turned into the color of ripe tomatoes. Satisfied, he studied the menu.

Lights. Flashing spots in front of his eyes that blinded him, pulling him out of his sleep. Then, just brightness, constant and harsh and impossible to ignore. With a groan, Matteo blinked. The view to which he opened his eyes confused him, didn’t make sense. Two pizza boxes on a table, a DVD cover next to them and when he turned his head to his left, there was a small body curled up against his shoulder.

Luna.

With her name, his memory came back. They had been watching a movie while they ate their pizzas. They had talked too, a lot, about everything. At some point after that, they must have fallen asleep. But why were the lights turned on now?

An “Aww” from the other side of the room interrupted his thoughts and this time, he recognized that voice. Nina. Or, as he found out, Gastón and Nina. Crap.

His best friend held a phone in his hand, a big grin on his lips as he took yet another photo. Nina simply stood next to him and sent a fond smile in their direction. “Look at them, it’s so cute”, she whispered.

“What are you doing here?”, Matteo asked, immediately softening his voice when he felt Luna moving.

“Oh, look, Sleeping Beauty is awake”, Gastón commented, “That’s why you didn’t answer your phone. Also, quick question for you” – his grin got even bigger and Matteo knew his best friend, he knew he was about to get dragged – “Where are my textbooks you wanted to get?”

The textbooks. Right, he had entered the apartment for a reason. Matteo felt his cheeks heating up, how did he forget about it completely? (The answer to this question laid next to him, of course.) “Eh, your textbooks…”

“Well, they weren’t on my desk at home roughly twenty minutes ago, so let me guess, they’re still in Nina’s room?”

“Gastón, be easy on him! And by the way, I believe you owe me 10 bucks now”, Nina interrupted to Matteo’s relief. But also… “Why does he owe you 10 bucks?”

“Uh, nothing”, they stuttered in sync, unable to look at Matteo anymore. He raised an eyebrow. “Okay, what is going on?”

No answer, only more fidgeting and awkward silence. “Nina, why does Gastón owe you money?”, he gave it another shot, hoping his instinct was right and she’d cave in. Indeed, said girl glanced at her boyfriend, sighed but in the end murmured: “Gastón said you two wouldn’t get along, or at least not right away, but apparently, you do, so well, yeah…”

Gastón cut her off, and his flushed cheeks didn’t go unnoticed by Matteo. “Yeah, Nina, I am super tired, I think we should go to bed now and leave these two alone. Have fun on the couch, good night!”, he babbled and before both Nina and Matteo got the chance to say a single word, he pulled his girlfriend out of the room.

After Gastón and Nina disappeared into her room, Matteo carefully shifted around, until he got a better look at the sleeping girl next to him. If it was for him, he’d let her lay like this forever. But sooner or later Luna would wake up and go to her room, even when she seemed comfortable for the moment.

Matteo exhaled. Maybe he should go home, allow them both to get some rest. Gently, he reached out to her arm and patted it. “Hey, Luna, wake up.”

“Ugh, just five more minutes”, she grumbled, crawling even closer to him.

Why did she make it harder than it already was? “If you go to bed now, you can sleep as much as you want, munchkin.”

“Wait, what?” Luna shrieked up, eyes wide open. “Oh my, did I…? I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to, well, eh…” She blushed often, he thought, before he decided to jump in: “Hey, it’s all good, but really, you should go to bed.”

She rubbed her eyes and when she yawned, that’s how he knew he had made the right decision. “So, uh, are you leaving?” She turned her head away from him, yet disappointment tinted her voice, causing him to smile. “Well, it’s already past midnight.”

“Why don’t you sleep on the couch?”, Luna offered, staring at the mess on the table, “I mean, it’s not your bed, but it’s so late and… wait, Gastón keeps stuff here, you could borrow something of that!” How could he possibly have the heart to say No to that?

The next time he woke up, darkness surrounded him. No sound reached his ears but the endless ticking of the clock and his breath.

No, he heard someone else breathing too. “Matteo? Are you awake?”

“Luna? What’s… why aren’t you in your bed?” Without the lights, he found it hard to tell where she stood, not that it stopped him from trying. “Did something happen?”

“No”, she replied, “I just got some water and then I heard you say something.” He felt the couch sinking where she sat down. “Don’t worry, I tend to talk a lot in my sleep, apparently.”

“Oh, okay, well then. Is it comfortable enough?” Matteo hesitated. Then he slightly nodded: “Yeah…”

“Doesn’t sound like it, actually. You know, we never had anyone over who slept on the couch, because Gastón always sleeps in Nina’s bed, so I have no idea if it’s comfy.”

Slowly, his eyes got used to the darkness, so he indeed spotted her silhouette next to him. “Well, it could be better, I can’t lay on my back, my shoulders are a bit sore.” “Why?”, she asked, to which he didn’t answer.

“Oh”, Luna stammered, probably blushing again, “I’m really sorry.” Matteo grinned. “It’s okay, we all want to make a lasting first impression, don’t we?” He expected her to laugh, to shoot back with a witty remark or at least shake her head. Anything really. Instead, Luna started shifting around and only stopped when the sofa creaked. “Okay, you know what, follow me.”

“What?”

“I said follow me, and now get up before I change my mind.” She laughed, but it sounded nervous and he didn’t need any lights to imagine her playing with her hair.

He met Luna a few hours ago. A few hours, which was nowhere near enough to build any meaningful relationship and still, the moment he walked into her room he thought how well it captured her. Warm and bright colors, pictures on every wall, and her skates she had mentioned next to her desk. And right in the middle, Luna, arms crossed, tapping her feet in a distressed rhythm.

Matteo turned to her. “You don’t have to do this just because you want to be nice, I’ll be fine, really.” Her hair whipped up and down when she shook her head, “No, you’re the guest and anyway, I owe you.”

“Are you sure you are okay with this?” It wasn’t like Matteo didn’t want to share this bed with her. In fact, right now, he couldn’t think of anything better to happen to him. After all, Luna was incredibly cute and funny and he liked how she stood up to him and he knew he had to get to know her better. But she still looked nervous and he hated to think he was the reason for this.

“Yes, sure, just lay down already, I’m tired.”

She crawled under the blanket after him. “Please don’t strangle me in my sleep”, Matteo commented before she turned off the lights and in return, finally again, received a laugh. Why was it such a pure sound that filled his chest with a tingling sensation?

“I won’t”, Luna giggled, “I promise. Good night, Matteo.”

“Good night, munchkin.”

When his eyes fluttered open the next morning, he faced her. 

A strand of her open hair tickled his nose until he carefully brushed it away. As he took in the view of Luna sleeping, he was unable to stop the smile on his lips.

Had he ever seen something more beautiful? Sunshine fell directly on her face, painting it in shades of gold. Her brown curls shimmered in the soft morning light and she was close enough for him to smell the last hints of her perfume.

All he wanted was to pull her closer, into his arms where he could feel her warmth. When he recalled the last evening, it felt like an explosion of color in a same old grey sky. How was he supposed to go back to the routine of his days after this? After grasping the concept of being drawn to someone, right at first sight? Not that he had been unhappy before, not at all, but Luna reached to his senses, woke them up to a new reality. No way could Matteo allow this to be a one-time experience. 

He would totally ask her out before he left this apartment.

“So, what do you think about Nina’s roommate?”, Gastón inquired the second the door to the apartment closed behind them. “Because to me it looks like you are over the moon for her. Also, you need to tell me what happened last night! I mean, you nearly gave me a heart attack when I didn’t find you at home. Where have you been? Landing on the moon?”

Matteo glanced over his shoulder to find his best friend with an impossibly big smirk on his face. “Very funny, Gastón, really.” He rolled his eyes, already aware his best friend would never let this go. Gastón loved puns way too much for that. But when Matteo thought of Luna, that she had said yes, that he’d see her again, the jokes were almost bearable.