#when i say i love dean
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Something about the fact that both Dean and Cas think they’ve fucked up too many times to be redeemed, that they aren’t worth saving, and yet they forgive each other.
Something about the fact that both of them, faced with an outside force compelling them to kill the other, pushed past that to save each other’s lives.
Something about Cas dying to save Dean time after time because he can’t stand the thought of seeing Dean dead, not knowing what it does to Dean to see Cas dead, and to feel like the blood is on his hands; about Cas trying to restructure the universe for Dean and Dean just wanting him to stay.
Something about Dean teaching Cas to be more human and then, when he is human, failing to help him and having to live with the regret of that.
Just…something about Cas and Dean and the way that they’re simultaneously doomed and inevitable, always circling around something but never able to land
#on a meta level you could say it’s chuck keeping them apart#on a more meta level chuck is the writers/showrunners#but anyway#rip sam who had to watch this extravagant dance#and all he got out of it was a dead best friend dead brother blurry wife and party city wig#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#spn meta#castiel#cas#deancas#casdean#destiel#destiel meta#dean studies#when i say i love dean#dean winchester character study#dean winchester meta
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Supernatural September - Day 2 | Identity
#spnsept24#destiel#Destiel art#dean Winchester#castiel#spnfanart#wiggleart#this is part of a scene I’ve had in my head for years but never wrote#the scene was post empty rescue and cas had to make a choice about going fully human or angel#and in the scene cas makes the comment to Dean ‘you’d probably hate if it I chose Angel’ or something#not exactly those words but whatever. that prompts Dean to say what I just drew up there#that he loves Cas and Cas is Cas whether he’s human or an angel#and it was all inspired by comments I used to see of people arguing for Angel endgame cas saying he’s always been an angel that’s who he is#that’s his identity etc etc and this show in part is about shedding those predestined roles#and so that argument always bothered me#I’m a human endgame person but I don’t mind angel endgame in some cases but#when the whole argument is that being an angel is who cas is I’m like maaaaaaan shh#wkeljflskdjfkldjvd
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whenever i think abt misha saying he didn't start playing cas as in love with dean until s15 i am like. that man is a Known liar who lies
#looking at those endverse gifs i just reblogged and. thee absolute fondness in cas's eyes when he looks at 2009 dean#like hello that (former) angel is literally in love#also thee fact that he was meant to say 'i LOVE past you' in that scene but they changed it............#but also just. so many scenes over the course of 12 yrs. he was in love !!!#and misha was Aware mr. i-read-destiel-blowjob-fic-after-my-first-episode#he knew what he was doing. for 12 yrs.#vic.txt
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Whenever fanfiction has Dean say he hates Cas’s coat or thinks it's stupid or ugly and he wants to see Cas out of it as soon as possible I simply must disagree. He kept that thing for a whole year full of rank water. He saw Cas back in his usual getup and gotar bonar. Dean loves cartoons. He loves costumes. He loves Cas’s coat.
#he wants to jerk off on it. who said that.#he wants to jerk off on it both on the outside (marking his territory) and on the inside (intimate and defiling.).#he wants to wear the coat and nothing else and jerk off and then give it back to Cas while it's still warm from his body.#idk who said that must have been the wind#this is a passing thought I haven't seen this recently#Dean does ALSO very much enjoy seeing Cas dressed up but he LOVES base Cas who wears the same outfit every day#am i projecting because I always dismiss when cas is described in other clothes and imagine him in the trench coat anyway. yes.#but there is textual evidence that dean likes the coat#also his 'you think it's crappy 🥺' 'eye of the beholder' comment#even if he DID think Cas's coat was lame. which he doesn't!!! he could never say it to him
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how to look at your brother in a platonic and god-honoring way
#'they're just brothers' whats all this#WHATS ALL THIS THEN#if you asked ANYONE who didn't know ab spn#who dean was looking at#approximately 0% would say his brother#and the vast majority would probably say a love interest#what is it like for non wincesties to not see how in love they are when they watch the show?#what kind of peace do they have that i will never know?#how sad must the watching experience be for them without seeing the 15 year love story of sam and dean?#emma rewatches spn#1x13 route 666#spn#wincest#samdean
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hey bro, is it cool if i write and perform a comedy set entirely about our life together that no one else understands just so i can see your beautiful smile
#trobed#troy barnes#abed nadir#community#community nbc#community tv#danny pudi#donald glover#screencaps#s3#jeff winger#this end tag is so special to me#troy already knew all the jokes which werent funny at all and completely sucked because theyre all about living in apt 303#i like to think abed just performs this routine for him when hes sad#this is at the end of the blade ep where troy got upset bc britta called him a loser for being a genuinely nice person#ep before that was pillows and blankets#so#to me this is abed saying hey. dont be sad anymore. smile and laugh instead because i love you#jeff and the dean really dont need to be there. this is all for troy
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Sam, getting to know Dean in season 1.
#was there even anything he knew about dean. like...#i wonder if it's because dean has changed a lot during the four years they were apart#or if sam was too young/immature to actually see dean past his exterior before stanford#probably a mix of both. but it's so interesting because the idea he had of him doesn't have anything to do with the actual dean!!#sam winchester#dean winchester#supernatural#spn season 1#corespnedit#.anna#also psst this is why it's dumb to call dean a creep just because sam once implied that dean would sleep with minors#like sam at times tends to see him as worse than he is!#like when he can't believe dean actually loved cassie or cares about saving a kid's life#so - don't trust too much what he says about him#in particular because all of the women dean actually slept with were roughly the same age as him or older#(aside from the fact that sam was probably joking that time)
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thinking about how in the siren episode the point is that dean craves the perfect version of a little brother who’d submit to him & adore him
and then we also have dean locking sam in the panic room and being willing to let him die there because he thinks sam is a monster (aka no longer the perfect version of dean’s brotherwife). he even admits it in 5.18 (“i have let you rot in there”)
dean doesn’t love sam unconditionally and it’s canon!
#i always see posts saying dean is such a simp and how pathetically in love with sam he is#yes he does obsessively love sam but he by no means is a simp 24/7. the only times he’s a simp is when sam behaves in a way that dean likes#dean winchester#sam winchester#wincest#samdean#spn
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tbh i think i just find it more interesting to appreciate dean how he is and have zero interest in proving his general goodness. like maybe if i Didnt find that specific type of character so compelling id be more invested in mischaracterisation (though id like to think not <3).
but a lot of hellers/extreme deangirls dont approach spn like a horror show with the thesis 'family is hell' (which is what it initally Is) they approach it like a fantasy-comedy-action show with a funny bisexual mc and his gay angel bf. either because they're not interested or because theyre uncomfortable with the actual show thats there. which is their prerogative! like sure i guess. you do you.
but its interesting bc it means we have 2 fanbases which are rabidly different to each other and get completely different things out of the show and yet keep brushing up against each other. we parcel it into 'samgirl' and 'deangirl' but that makes it sound like its literally just Fans Of The Character when tons of samgirls (myself included <3) love dean. the real dean that is. (also even samgirl fandom is ripe w misinterpretation but all fandoms have that at least theyre kind-of misinterpreting the same show as me. deangirl fandom is something entirely different.)
#of course i would say that the spn that hellers like is entirely invented. but they can do that if they want. love and light. it just annoys#me when i have to see it. which of course would not be a problem if we werent all sharing a fandom.#also samgirl-style misinterpretation tends to be Romanticisation & misunderstanding the power dynamic#goes hand in hand with like a third of wincesties. 'omg sam has sooo much power over dean <3. wow they are both so totally constantly#on the same level. sam is crazyyyy.'#which like... its not True. but at least we're talking roughly about the same source material#i think hellers r mostly interested in something thats. not quite the source material. which is. well. <3#spn#supernatural#oliver talks
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What drew them to each other is that they were both willing to do reprehensible things.
Whether it's to save their own skins, to save their families, to carry out a plan... They're naturally fucked up in the same pragmatic way.
But they can BE their full, "flawed, petty evil creatures" in full light of the other.
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DUNDUNDUN SAM WAS JUST WAITING FOR HER TO TURN AWAY WHAT A BASTARD
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She should've gotten to KILL him at least once, I think. Just to further make their bond weirder.
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"Don't struggle," she says.
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ALSO.
I like to watch the unraveling futility of their ambitions. Rowena, Crowley, and Sam were all united by wanting status and ambition to help them escape "a rigged game."
"And it took everything from me, everyone I love-- my family."
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BOOM. There it is.
See, Rowena sees the lengths Sam will go, and she actually RESPECTS it.
Their relationship is built on the comfort of understanding WHY they're willing to gut each other AND each other's loved ones. Strong feelings that they try to dissociate themselves from.
They use their smarts and ruthlessness to protect themselves and their loved ones at all costs.
And they both want to change.
"You were never gonna kill him. There was a time you would've. But not now."
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There is such an--an OPENNESS about the bad things they've done, and Sam needs that in his life.
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And in season 15, Rowena knows that Sam wouldn't have been able to kill her at the end there... not unless she guided his hand and helped him.
#sam has tried to shoot dean (gun wasn't loaded)#he tried to shoot crowley with the colt right after crowley handed it to him#he shot emma#he had you sacrifice oskar#that's just the quirks of being sam winchester#this was THE moment for me guys seriously#funeralia is THEEEEE episode i went full hog#and in theory i like eileen but#there's such friend vibes between them like they're trying to give dean a templated mix of john mary dean jody....#but sam pairs SO well with such a posh girly girl who's a loser and so so fucked up it's beautiful#and i think they thought maybe it wouldn't but bela wasn't the same kind of rich girl as rowena tries to be right?#bela wasn't tied to ambition like rowena was... getting power to escape her fear... bela was already doomed#and like sam and rowena just FEELS less templated#and i LOVE eileen and what shosannah says about her at the time time#you see my dilemma#cause sam is the REALER sam when he's wil rowena#spn funeralia
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✨7x03 || The Girl Next Door✨
#I LOVE THIS SCENE SO SO MUCH YOU DONT UNDERSTAND#dean being high on morphine saying hey look a monster broke my leg is actually the cutest thing he's ever done#and when bobby pats his cheek 😭😭 i love them so much#also don't mind me completely removing the ablest comment from dean. not a fan of that#spn 7x03#spnedit#deanedit#cowboycoven#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#dean and bobby#usermoogs#tusersana#jenna.gif
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Listen, Billie said “You wanna die.”
Not “you’re okay with dying,” not “you’ll face death,” not “you’re willing to sacrifice your life for these people to find peace,” but “you wanna die.” And Dean doesn’t argue with it, because she’s right.
It’s on the level for me of Famine telling Dean he’s empty in terms of “Oh I could pick this apart and draw so much about him out of it” and I just,, really love Dean Winchester
#i didn’t watch spn for years but even before i started i knew enough that i assumed i would be a dean girlie and i was so right#i didn’t choose this life#it forced me to live it#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#spn meta#deancas#casdean#destiel meta#dean meta#when i say i love dean#i also hate him#hes so dumb#and also so messed up#this is actually tragic#but what can you do
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Destiel Pride - Day 5; Cursed or not
#destiel#dean winchester#castiel#Destiel pride#Destiel art#destiel fanart#spn fanart#spn art#spnfanart#wiggleart#ETA: i jsut realized it's the 5th of a month and it's pride#i'm so sorry lol#the cursed or not line comes in response to cas saying in 7.23 that he’s not good luck#and following the cursed or not line dean asks if he seems like good luck as well#and that got me to thinking about the curses these boys are constantly under be it overarching ones like ‘deans boyfriends#always die some how’ or more literal ones like spells and possessions and what not#but no matter what they always find their way back to each other like when Dean was grieving so hard in#season 13 that Jack who barely had consciousness that that point managed to break through the empty and wake cas up#so I wanted to draw 1518 which is the last curse that I know will be fixed in the continuation#don’t @ me on that it’s a major plot thread that needs addressing lol#and it can almost seem like love is a curse in this show but they’d rather have that love than not so#…also black goo lol
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Hinny ♥️ - The Chronicles of Harry J. Potter's mind
She's Ron's little sister 😡
She's Ron's sister.😠
She's Ron's... 🫤
She's... 😵💫
She's so beautiful. 😍
Shit, she's looking my way. WAIT. DID SHE JUST WINK AT ME? 😳
Stop staring. Look somewhere else. Fuck, I think Dean noticed... Awkward... 😬
Okay, try to act cool. Stand against the wall, cross you arms, and look nonchalant, like you don't care. 😎
*stubbles with hand placement and footing* 🫨
Ginny: "Hi Harry"
tries to cover his dopey smile but ends up swooning instead. 🥴
#it's okay son we get it we'd be swooning too#in inability to put a coherent sentence together while talking to the loml is a trait he inherited from his dad#he is james son after all#it's in his genes#my son is such a cute lil dork and i love him so much more because of it#i don't care what anyone says ginny NOTICED harry NOTICING her#that top was strictly for harry when she noticed him counting the freckles on her shoulder during practice#she loved that she could make him blush with just one look#tbh she kind of forgot about dean lmao#she broke up with dean within the hour#hbp missing moments#harry potter#ginny weasley#harry x ginny#ginny x harry#hinny#harry potter ai#ai generated
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I made my post about Dean Highbottom and then as I was writing my tags realised that his Hunger Games counterpart is Haymitch. and now my head is in my hands and I don’t think I’ll ever recover
#IM GOING TO CRY. I am part of the system I never wanted anything to do with it#I killed so many people without laying a hand on them. I never ever asked for this. I tried to say no. my hands are still bloody.#both turned to drugs to cope. both had a mentee who reminded them of someone they hated so much#(snow reminded the dean of his old friend. katniss reminded haymitch of himself)#both knew exactly how the games worked and all of its consequences because one made it and the other lived it#both lived in the shadows of the past and never really got out from it#but in the end one of them chose to be cruel to the children who they were asked to mentor#and the other loved even when it was killing him#god. twenty three years and they never managed to drown the fire out of him. his heart broke again and again#but he held onto those shards even as they made his hands bleed. and then one day two children appeared and pieced it back together#and some of it was missing and always would be. you can’t undo twenty three years of alcoholism and pain and grief and self loathing#but a lot of it was still there. far more than he ever even believed could have survived#Haymitch I love youuuuuuuuu I will always love you#and Dean Highbottom you were kinda cringe and lame. guynobody ass bitch. do better#haymitch abernathy#dean highbottom#thg#the hunger games#a ballad of songbirds and snakes#abosas
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i can't stop thinking about the first episode of season 6, when sam tries to convince dean to come with him, to come back to hunting. he says "it's just better with you around, that's all." it's an interesting line because sam is soulless, obviously. and even though he doesn't understand the details yet, he knows something's wrong with him.
"it's better with you around" he says, citing dean's compassion and care for others as the reason why. and how interesting is that? sam's working with plenty of other hunters who still have their souls—they're all more than capable of caring about the people they save. but sam needs dean specifically. he knows he's missing something, and he sees dean and recognizes that something in him. even cold and calculating and unrelentingly logical, sam recognizes that dean, alone, can "complete" him, give something back to him that he's supposed to have.
in episode 8 he tells dean he "needs his help." he doesn't elaborate; he never explains what he means by that. he has a whole family of hunters who'd be willing and able to help him, but still he needs dean. even without his soul, his hyperrational mind knows he needs him.
soulless sam isn't capable of caring about dean. but he doesn't need to care to know they need to be together, no matter what—to know dean is good for him, dean completes him, dean needs to be there for him.
it's like a sick reversal of season 1. sam drags dean back into this life because he can't keep going without him. because he needs him. because when you think about it logically, and sam has no other choice, there was never any other option for them.
#supernatural#wincest#i mean i'm absolutely looking at this through wincest-colored lenses but this isn't even a romantic observation#and i think that makes it so much worse#every time soulless sam gives an indication that he needs dean in his life even when he's incapable of caring about him. that's so fucked u#like what the fuck do you mean sam's dependence on dean isn't even irrational. that it's so normal to him that it's completely logical#to need him. that sam needs dean the way humans need air to breathe: an unalterable fact of nature and reality#'there are also things about it i remember that i... let's just say i think i should probably go back to being him'#What The Fuck Do You Mean By That Sammy#having a soul hurts but he should 'probably' go back to having one#he says in a conversation about how he knows he should care about dean but doesn't#like there's something inside him screaming for dean. and it's trapped and trying to claw its way out#he needs to care about dean no matter what the cost is. he needs to love him again#it's unnatural and wrong for him to exist without loving his brother. is that what you're saying. is that it#i just can't stop thinking about soulless sam. sorry. what's wrong with him seriously#besides not having a soul#.txt#sam#the winchester gospel#spn posting#6.01#6.08#spn6
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