#whatever he asks for is done
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Hi Hello can I subscribe to be part of that collective?
Little something I made for the 5 people on Tumblr who are also in love with him
#whatever he asks for is done#he reminds me of an old teacher who terrified me#but he’s still babygirl#reece shearsmith#league of gentlemen#psychoville#inside no 9#such a skrunkly#a scrumblo if you will
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world's longest staring contest GO-
#them. he??? wally plural <3#how are they the same little man....#looking between them in confusion so fast i get whiplash#one half of my brain: huh what huh what huh-#the other half: HOLY SHIT TWO WALLYS!!!!!! <3<3<3<3<3<3#wait would it be wallys or wallies#fr what Is wally plural#existential questions we should all ask ourselves#scribble garnish#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#welcome home fanart#wally darling#i got a little lost in the Sauce making this & finished before realizing i didnt copy it over to a new larger canvas#& do the final layer/colors/bg there#so its a Little Bit Lower Resolution than id like#BUT HEY ITS NOT LIKE THATS EVER STOPPED ME BEFORE!!!!#whatever whatever doesnt matter its done and im satisfied with it#& i fuckin better be bc working on this killed my wrist lmfao#nearly dropped my stylus at one point from the sudden Oofie Ouchie#suffice to say i will be queuing this & then taking a day-long break from my hobbies#which are all hell on the wrist#which means i will probably leave the house out of sheer boredom#maybe ill watch spiderverse. go get a tasty Beverage. take a walk. summon the old gods if im in a silly goofy mood#just now realizing i probably drew wally too small#puppet wally. og wally light of my life. AHAHA OOPSIES TOO LATE TO FIX IT NOW 🥲👍
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we as a collective do Not talk about this line delivery nearly enough and for good fucking reason, i'll kill bradley james for this one line alone. he's just a little boy :'((
#sami rambles#like. he's still the same little kid who didn't really know what it was to be looked after/cared for/doted on#at the heart of him he's still just that lonely young boy who always had to earn people's attention#or just take whatever he got for the simple fact of being the king's son :/#even after so long he's still not used to merlin's love. and now. now he can't see what he's ever done to deserve it#seeing everything all at once and he just. he needs answers before he goes.#he's just a little boy asking 'why' to prolong his bedtime a few moments more#oh fuck. just caused irreparable damage to myself with that last one ahaha#merlin#bbc merlin#arthur pendragon#merthur#bradley james
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I should find another hobby
Anyway, if Merlin was set in modern times, Arthur would have called Merlin his “gay awakening”.
#arthur’s mind in this moment (probably)#‘what the fuck is a stab with a magical sword anyway’#‘let me kiss merlin’#‘let’s smooch’#‘let’s go back to camelot and copulate’#‘why haven’t i done this before i mean WHATEVER I’M JUST DYING SO’#‘let’s make the best of my last few moments AM I RIGHT FELLAS’#‘come on merlin one small peck coME HERE’#and merlin’s thoughts (probably):#‘if you die without kissing me i will sentence you to death’#‘no hesitation’#‘put those pretty lips on minE COME ON ARTHIE’#merlin’s thought as he waits for arthur’s return (probably)#‘i’ll kill him again. what the fuck does thank you even mean’#‘bro be for real we’re just gay’#‘we were supposed to bed each other and you died in my arms instead’#‘pretty dramatic if you ask me’#if you didn’t notice i’m going insane#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin#arthur pendragon#merlin bbc#i’ll probably delete it later because i don’t feel that sure about it but i wanted a laugh#i made this out of desperation for the finale since i finished my rewatch#please send help
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Don't look at me ok ok? This is a so-so warm up that I drew in hopes of working on my other art projects after, but I ended up calling it after this and not drawing KAJSKAJK. Just felt like sharing this, despite it looking so stiff :') I love this fuzzy elf though.
#omensarttag#MADE HIM SO FUZZY AND THATS THE ONLY THING I LIKE ABOUT THIS!!#pov you just got done training with kurt or whatever#AKSHKDH#needed an excuse as to why this man is disrobing so i don't look too feral lmaoo#kurt wagner my beloved#why is he doing the limp wrist. you ask?#easy answer.#he's gay#he's so gay guys#really tho...#aksjkjska#i did not want to put in the effort of drawing a decent hand for a warm up so i went the easy route#kurt wagner#x men#artwork#fanart#nightcrawler#digital art#artists on tumblr#x men 97#x men comics#xmen fanart#xmen art#xmen#kurt wagner fanart
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obi-wan, approaching cody who sat, propped against what he thinks is part of the at-te's leg, battered and bloody, placing a gentle hand on his arm: you did well out there, cody.
cody, grimacing but chuckling: ‘e couldn't have done it without you, general.
obi-wan: oh, i did the easy part.. the difference in appearance really proves that, hm?
cody: mmf.
obi-wan: we need to get you to the medic, my dear.. helix won't be pleased to see either of us again, but you won't be getting away with walking this one off.
cody, managing a small pained smile: yes, general.. permission to rest?
obi-wan, fondly, and ever so gently pressing a kiss to the clones forehead: permission granted.. you deserve it.
#commander cody#star wars the clone wars#obi wan kenobi#codywan#obi wan x cody#incorrect quotes#codywan incorrect quotes#i got way to stressed over trying to figure out what to write for today– so you get whatever my brain threw out. tis alright#the rare times cody actually needs/wants to rest– he asks first. hes a good soldier :( wants to make sure he's done everything#obi-wan carries him back#post battle
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I high key like the idea of Batman going after Danny for whatever reason and while getting info on Danny Cujo is discovered and Damian is like "Father I must help you capture/talk to/whatever this guy you're tracking down".
Bruce thinks Damian is finally warming up to him and this is a way for them to get closer. Damian just wants Danny's dog.
#dp x dc#dpxdc#dc xdp#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#dp x dc crossover#the idea has prob been done before but I like it#just Batman finally getting Danny and Damian just shouts out “where's the dog?”#bat: what?#Damian: where's the dog. i want it. I'll pay whatever price you ask#bat: of you wanted me to buy you a dog-#Damian: no this dog is special I must have it#Danny: you really tracked me down to steal a dog?!#Damian: i offered you money#Danny: he's not even my dog!#Batman#Bruce Wayne#Damian#dc Damian#Danny phantom#Cujo#dp Cujo#Danny Fenton#Father son bonding time#Damian wants Cujo#Danny wants people to stop assuming Cujo is his and attacking him for it#Danny can't catch a break#and we love that for him
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Why did Apollo favor the trojans in the Illiad?
So, dear Anon, I've been thinking about how to answer this question since I got it a couple days ago and I think I kind of want to make something clear before I get into it.
The Iliad by itself as a poem only covers some of the events that occur in the final year of a long protracted conflict that had been brewing for at least two decades and was an active war for ten. Within the space of the Iliad itself, the motivations and affairs of the major players are often referenced but there are many, many parts of the story that are not there because they belong to a different story cycle that has been since lost or was never recorded with words. In the space of the Iliad Apollo's motivations are questioned a lot - his pride is questioned by Poseidon who thinks Apollo should be just as angry at the Trojans as he considering Apollo was treated equally as poorly by Laomedon while they worked together. His honour is questioned by Hera who chastises him for taking the Trojans' side when he'd proclaimed that Achilles would live a long life and prosper at Thetis and Peleus' wedding. His own sister calls him a coward for refusing to fight when Zeus gives permission for the gods to go wild on the battlefield. For all that there's this image of Apollo in the Iliad as some staunch and unwavering protector of the Trojans, believe it or not, I largely think of Apollo as neutral in the war.
Which, I suppose, comes back to the question - why did Apollo favour the Trojans? The truthful answer is that I don't know. The Iliad and all its connected stories isn't something I've done enough research on to have an answer or a reference to an answer off the top of my head. The reasoning I'm aware of is that Apollo was a Patron God of Troy and really a god doesn't need any reason besides that to protect his people but it's not like Apollo abandoned the Greeks either. Calchas is the biggest example of that I can point to - descended directly from a priest of Apollo and one who attributed his mantic power to the god, Calchas was pivotal in ensuring the Greeks even got to Troy in the first place.
From a personal perspective however, I think Apollo was more dedicated to the house of Priam than he was the city of Troy itself. Apollo's affection for that house and all its members ran deep - from his admiration of Hecuba and Hector to his love and attempted courtship of Cassandra to his blessings given to Helenus, Deiphobos, Cassandra, Troilus and even his partnership with Paris - Apollo loved the house of Priam. When you think about the times Apollo lashes out against the Greeks, it's generally because they've done some nonsense to earn his ire. The plague was caused by Agamemnon disrespecting his priest, his aid in the slaughter of Patroclus was because he didn't respect him, his minor grudge against Diomedes too was because he tried to test Apollo's mettle and well, the less said about Achilles the better. Apart from his obvious favouring of Hector in the skirmishes, Apollo doesn't really oppose the Greeks. He has a ton of reasons to by the time the Iliad rolls around, including avenging the death of two of his sons, but he remains mostly satisfied with conducting his father's business and overseeing the war from a somewhat professional perspective. To me, it's always been less about Apollo caring about the fate of Troy as a city itself and more about him just really wanting to protect the people in the city that he's come to love and respect.
Of course, I encourage you to take my words with a big tablespoon of salt - like I said, I don't really know enough about the facts in particular to give a solid, confident answer but I can give you my interpretation of it. Maybe consult someone like @littlesparklight for a more comprehensive and grounded response 🤔
#ginger answers asks#Thank you so much for the question even if my answer was somewhat lacking lmao#For the record btw Apollo doesn't stay mad at Diomedes forever either - he pretty much drops it after the Funeral Games#and helps him get rid of the cursed ass Palladium when he goes to consult an oracle about it lmao#Apollo just generally doesn't fuck with people who have too much hubris for their own good#Like he r e a l l y hates that#But Apollo more or less went wherever he was called and did whatever needed to be done#to keep the war flowing and progressing the way it should#I always find his lack of retaliation against Achilles to be a point of extreme interest#Yes he eventually aids in Achilles death together with Paris but Apollo refrained from getting vengeance against him for years#Depictions of Apollo being held back when Achilles assaults and kills Troilus always ALWAYS intrigue me#And it's always what I think about when I hear people talk about Apollo hating the Greeks or favouring the Trojans#Apollo didn't have any beef with his family at that time and he certainly didn't care enough about any particular human to go against his#family - he says so himself when Poseidon is goading him to fight and yet I cannot help but think about how he kills Neoptolemus#Interesting man indeed#apollo#the iliad
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I think it’s so ironic that the Pony Express escapes a lot if not all blame in discussion. I can’t even say I am excused from it but it’s just how hard people circle back to the characters alone without considering the environment they were made to be in.
Why would they design a ship where only two of the rooms lock? Not the bathroom? Not the sleeping quarters? We assume that all the companies in the universe are this shallow and careless to their workers but we explicitly know the Pony Express in extra vile. They are fed processed slop pack they can’t even really cook and the ration of those pack is meager at best. They hired and made people with a plethora of conflicting demeanors and beliefs work together on a mission where cohesion is important if not an outright necessity and punish them for not being happy about it. There’s no social protocols, not chain of command other than Captain’s word/choice and the only way to enforce that is with a literal firearm. They don’t allow them to celebrate freely and even took away leisure activities that would make them less stir crazy. They are only allowed a few hours of sleep despite their being no other real responsibilities or work on the ship, no matter the position or its importance. With any crew, with any level of synergy, this was a powder keg waiting for a spark.
I’m not saying characters that made mistakes didn’t make huge ones, but I think part of the horror is that at least for some (this is targeting Jimathan) those mistakes are partly made by a force of the hand. There’s a running theme of lack of choice and being forced into something and the very nature of how The Pony Express expected them to function plays a big part.
#like even I forget that all actions taken in the game were people trying to remain in protocol outside of Jimmy#Anya couldn’t have jus stolen the scanner and got the gun cause she’s a sensible person and knows she’d be in legal trouble#or get everyone’s credits docked or just hoping that there’s some chain of command for this sort of thing#Daisuke only really acted in accordance to his direct superiors because he’s an intern he wouldn’t know the first thing about protocol or#what to do in any situation. like this is essentially implied to be his first real job#Curly may be the captain but he still has to follow rules and procedures and we see with the letter the Pony Express likely has very shady#and shitty ones. he gives the best not depressing or totalitarian options he can otherwise everything is just his word which aren’t even his#or like him just asserting his position with the gun which he wouldn’t do#Swansea follows the book begrudgingly because he’s trying to stay right and not fall back into who he once was#I feel like it’s not incorporated nearly enough that the environment they were dropped into heavily affected their actions#say there was a single person higher than Curly or a plan of action when a crew member is considered a danger to himself or others#I think it’s fascinating how people will stick to protocol and break when they get scared or to their limit#cause the game shows how normalcy deteriorates and I think discounting what the characters where put through by the company takes a way a#real and scary aspect of what happened to Anya because as a friend Curly didn’t do enough for her at all his comfort was there and he#appreciated but it was a distracted sort of care but as a Captain he didn’t protect her but he’s was a Captain of the Pony Express like what#if they told him to wait to? he still should’ve done something because Anya was actively suffering and Jimmy should’ve been reprimanded but#he’s a captain with orders like the Tulpar isn’t his ship in the same way like#god I wanna explain this in a way that makes sense but the Tulpar is like designed to breed animosity and work on the bare requirements one#needs to get things done that’s not how people work and if anyone deviates or interrupts that it literally has nothing to handle it#it becomes clear that if any social unrest happens why they just say fuck it and give the Captain the gun because if something happens the#blame can easily be placed on the person they put in charge despite what they put them#in charge of like this is just like work place harassment irl because often the perpetrators are not punished but the supervisors for not#stopping them with meetings or cuts or whatever but the environment the company fostered is rarely fixed or blamed#like why was this allowed to occur? and honestly that is because Jimmy did what he did#ask me about this if this is confusing cause I worded it crazy#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#the pony express
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oh boy !! ! ! ! !!! ! thANK y0u all for the kind words on my last art posts. you all get it and i was/still am so happy about it
as promised, here's some close-ups of the comic for image quality's sake, and other screenshots i rescued from the community whiteboard (and something else)
first up another sketch of mystery gender-ambiguous being. (please send me more name ideas for them if you got one- i like to hear em! (reminder it's the side character that appeared for <10 seconds in AvM Ep. 30))
a few fav scenes
emotional support cwab
they weren't meant for this purpose exactly, but i do have countless "fluffy sticks" loose in my notes and homework sheets from the school years.
papery critter.
even when i wasn't confident in fur or feathers, they helped me practice posing and create some satisfying gradients/flowing poses. (im a sucker for good tail poses) (oh yay! i found a good pic...)
and finally, little sneak peak for you for reading so far ;3
i realized that whiteboardfox is pretty great for my working needs. simple and to the point and all. feels nice with the mouse and the tablet.
so i started hashing out a big project idea just to see if it holds up and
[
several hours later ...
]
oh
oh man
it's a little bigger than i expected
<next>
#--/ art#alan becker#animator vs animation#animation vs minecraft#Minecraft bed#ava the dark lord#ava the chosen one#me when the project that obviously wasn't going to be done in one night isn't done in one night: D: !?!?!?!?#kudos to whoever routed the Speedrun actual short because that one is so fun and clean and savvy#clever made up time-savers? includes orange's TNT shield-jump?? nonlethal dragon dispatch??? sweet#ithink you can see where i tried to head with this#turns out that turning up the complexity 98 notches higher makes things trickier to parse hmmmmmm?#in fact i might need some help with this one ;>v>' like a lot.#i had a bit of a story and route set up already i just... wanted to make sure everything was at least kinda there...................#we'll see#the pie joke. i was trying to categorize which foodstuffs chosen should be able to make on the fly. with their flame hands.#ex. cooking meats makes sense because flint and steel works for the same purpose (you can kill a burning animal to get cooked meats)#but baking bread or drying kelp seems way more involved or whatever -> needs a proper furnace environment#HOWEVER... i noticed that Steve can just summon pumpkin pies from his bare hands if he wants to without even a workbench. so. sure! lol.#this is scraping the surface of the minutiae i want to consider#(ALSO KUDOS to everyone who RUNS/works on all-advancements. of course. riding on your shoulders here)#final joke is that chosen didn't know how crazy this undertaking would be to learn#but dark is very literally programmable. so you could maybe just plug some TAS instructions into him and off he goes#or even more open-ended than that just give him the list of advancements + stipulations + the wiki and similar result#it'd get done but. i dont think he'd find that fun at all. prefers to write his own instructions if you see what i mean#i might be forgetting some context. it is rather late you see. please ask me questions about this! ;P#tco aa
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marching forward through the Gates of Hell
#code geass#suzalulu#code geass lelouch of the rebellion#lelouch vi britannia#suzaku kururugi#lelouch lamperouge#god....tagging lelouch is literally so annoying#cg wld have been great if CLAMP said 'damn sunrise u comm us for our art style but cant animate for shit. hbu let us draw it instead#like deadass hwo u go out of ur way to ask CLAMP for designs then animate them AWFULLY BRO!!!!#i love love the character sheets they r beautifully done#all the offical art by CLAMP is stunning too but the anime is like. mf have nvr drawn in their lives I think....#esp Lelouch like CLAMP's art of him its like ooh yeh ofc he gets bitches. then u watch the anime n ur like ain't no way...#whatever anyw this is inspired by a CLAMP illustration where they wear these suits.#i tried to use very desat colors but. idk. also they look wonky but idk call me Sunrise Animation I refuse to do lineart nowadays#listened to TONS of old Coldplay thats the vibe I'm going for...#i love toxic star crossed lovers....latina sterotype 1 : me 0
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this is somewhat of a vent post & something i said i would not do again but has been plaguing me enough that i think getting it out might feel better. so. has anydoggy else been. Baffled and upset by nora sakavic’s refusal to speak on how terribly aftg has treated its characters of color? with the author of the series coming back with a new book and starting up on her online activity again, and questions of what she’d change about aftg bubbling up, it’s particularly glaring to me that we are all playing this very long game of pretend where we ignore how badly the non-white cast has been treated & her lack of thoughts on it
and i understand not wanting to bring up nicky and thea because people pick on her for it. i’m not trying to discredit nora sakavic’s terrible history of getting harrassed online by aftg fans. but i think it is very cynical, and it is very juvenile, and most of all very cruel, that she gets to ignore the very real ways the books have set up these characters to be hated. i think it’s obvious why the characters who get the most hate are the only canonical characters of color, and i think we do not get to treat this like a deliberate decision on the fandom’s part when the books have put these same characters in degrading and embarrassing and terrible positions in the first place. aftg is not a story about nice characters with clean pasts, but there is a very specific nastiness to the only characters of color being a brown man who sexually harasses and later assaults the main character, a black woman whose only scene is her lashing out at her love interest after being ignored for the first two books, and the japanese villain who gets maybe two lines of complexity before he goes back to being a terrible person. the white cast, in comparison, while not at all free from flaws, are never shown to commit mindless evil; all of their actions are ultimately justified. the book goes out of its way to give them concession after concession. we know exactly who to side with, because aftg tells us who these people are. does nicky’s assault ever get addressed in the books? does riko’s reasoning to be the way that he is ever gets more than briefly aluded to? is thea reserved even a shred of humanity or grace in her one scene?
anyway. it’s been years of talking about this and the fandom has been constantly hostile to criticism in this regard, and more recently any criticism at all, and it’s Grating to be on the other side of this discussion. it’s exhausting to know that in ten years we do not get even an acknowledgment besides the author saying she will not answer questions about nicky and thea anymore. it’s upsetting and it’s ugly and i wish no one had to talk about this again, but we do because what i thought was common sense has been washed away by a sudden influx of no-nuance adoration for the trilogy. basically i hope we all explode
#this has been so upsetting to notice but 🥹whatever#there is a different kind of bitterness to thinking about how ten years have passed#and we are getting new content that changes and maybe even rectifies many of the ways we see and interact w aftg#and none of it not a bit of it addresses the racism#how it’s been ten years and the only thing we really get to show it is a book about a ship between two white men the fandom came up with#after seeing them be Suggested to interact in canon#i understand not wanting to hurt nora sakavics feelings by asking her about this#but imagine how tired we are. Imagine how tired we are#do you know how bad it feels to read through nicky’s worst moments in aftg#and know that he was written this way because he looks like me?#do you understand how exhausting it all is. can you imagine?#the fandom has been so quick to undo the criticism fans of colors have been making since day one#and for what. for what! my doves. for what?#have we come out of it any greater? have we done anything but lie to ourselves?#and anyway this is not some mindless pessimism#this is not me telling you that aftg is bad and you cant love it; cant have it mean anything to you#this is me saying that when we acknowledge these things it makes us better readers and better people#nora sakavic if you are reading this from whatever hellhole america you find yourself in#grabs you by the shoulders. This is not the end#this is not something to sit back and feel bad about#you have opened the floodgates of hell with tsc. kick the door in and release a revised version of aftg#there is a real material way for you to make this better. it is possible and it will not kill you#i would read a revised aftg. my mutuals would. many many many many fans would#making mistakes is not just a human right its a human inevitability#but we do not have to let ourselves get defined by them. We can do hard things#lets go of nora sakavics shoulders. anyway. where were we#aftg#txt#tsc
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So it turns out there's a big craft guild organization thing only a few hours from where I live (I saw an ad for their craft fair), and I got like half my holiday shopping done on their website, and the box arrived today! The thing I was most excited to see in person is fragile, though, and it's really well wrapped in bubble wrap and I don't want it to break when I mail it to the friend it's for, so I am not unwrapping it, but oh man the temptation is there lol I also got myself a little metal bug made of a bottle cap and some wire. It lives on my little corkboard where I put postcards and thank you cards now
#the person behind the yarn#I have gotten a little sewing done today during my lunch break#but not much! not much#these unprecedented times sure are not good for my stress levels lol#but the indoor wasp is outdoor wasp again#and I managed to successfully request prescription refills from two of my doctors this week#(for different medications) so that was good! I'm allergic to an inactive ingredient used by most pharmacies in one med#so I have to get just that one medication from a different pharmacy chain and it throws doctors for a loop every time#other good things: I had the answers ready for a question my boss unexpectedly asked during a meeting today#when my dad last went shopping he got more kleenex and the boxes have flamingoes on them so that's cool!#uhhh my dad is volunteering more which means I get to help out more with some prep things for volunteering#which is great I miss volunteering but I can't do what I used to anymore#for the record I did make this post almost entirely to convince myself not to unwrap the super cool thing for my friend#the other small percentage is because I really like the metal bug#I want to make some metal bugs#I don't think I have any of whatever the artist used for filling the bottle cap but I have hot glue that'll probably work#...I think I'm going to make some metal bugs
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h-how do you ever finish any of your work? genuine question because you seem to be productive despite your agreste syndrome and I need to learn your ways. but also how do you ever finish any of your work
unclear. last night i stayed up and finished a report worth 25% of my grade at about 5am, arrived on time for my 9am lecture, and spent about half of it zoned out while thinking about seventeen year old emilie agreste. and i was one of the most active participants in the class discussion
#in some ways it IS the move to go to grad school right out of undergrad#because your body can still sort of operate like a college kid#i’m on about 3ish hours of sleep rn and this morning it felt SO over but now i’ve eaten something and we’re so back#i also don’t really do caffeine. except sometimes i’ll go get one of those panera death lemonades#i might be able to snag a short nap before work#but anyway about seventeen year old emilie. i was thinking abt how she was in that movie solitude and adrien said she was seventeen#WAIT. NO. HE SAID SHE WAS SEVENTEEN IN THAT PHOTO ON HIS DESKTOP NOT IN THE MOVIE#well. okay whatever i’m gonna tell you what i was thinking about anyway#OKAY i’m back i just checked the wikipedia page and then i watched the end of gorizilla. to make sure i’m not lying. because i’m normal.#anyway i was thinking about the solitude film and how it’s super rare and old and obscure and whatever. and how apparently#emilie wrote it herself and andre produced it#and i’m thinking about how gabe was discovered by audrey and that’s how he got his start in the fashion industry#so now i’m like?? did gabe and emilie first meet on the set of solitude? because gabe was designing costumes or whatever?#and that’s how audrey found him? have people already thought about this??#also i just checked and it doesn’t say emilie’s last name in the credits and also it’s ‘graham films’ with the twin rings logo m#so i’m assuming she’s still emilie graham de vanily at that point#anyway it comes back to seventeen year old emilie because i started imagining seventeen year old runaway emilie having her new life in pari#after escaping her british nobility life#and the first thing she does is write and star in an original movie. of course.#and she meets this repressed bisexual punk upstart costume designer who is so the opposite of everyone she’s ever known#and he’s immediately so unhealthily obsessed with her. which she appreciates.#and then they proceed to have the most toxic doomed evil relationship of all time#also she gets cheated because once gabe gets money he represses himself SO hard that he is now exactly like all the people emilie grew up w#but at least he’s still obsessed with her#this is what i was thinking about during class today. i don’t know how i get anything done either.#ml#anna rambles#asks
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Lasombra fashion show?
Now how did you know I've been meaning to draw fashion 'shows' for all the clans…?
But! Here's some Lasombra fashion stuff for you!
+ bonus because I love bullying Lasombra abt their tech issues (:
#vtm#vampire the masquerade#clan lasombra#lasombra#outfit design#mine#*24#ask#lasombra is kind of interesting/difficult imo in terms of making a fashion 'style' for them bc they're very varied internally#from corp goth shadow ceos to religious leaders to streetwise survivors. theyre unlike their counterpart ventrue in that their appearance#isnt rooted in sociological reasons as much as theyre personal ones imo. if that makes sense lol. but i tried to do a few different things!#something classically lasombra and then some more modern discreet + showy stuff. hope you like em? <3#for me lasombra is like dark fuschia-violet-purple and gold. silk velvet and dark lace. and ofc religious symbols#none of these guys have backstories or names or anything btw i just threw shit together. its easier to make up styles for chs#that have a story or a personality but like. i cant put rafael in this stuff or whatever lol he's kinda boring fashion wise#i thought abt doing shadow fashion too but i was like. thats way too impractical.#i kinda wanna finish those tremere fashion 'sketches' too. and maybe do some of deja's outfits bc she's a fashionista. there's also my#outfit wips for rose who's a ventrue... but also i wanna do freaky sabbat outfits... and a toreador look book... and finish the new#nikifor tzimisce fashion looks... help mee. at least the tzimisce one is like 85% done i just gotta work on the extra stuff a little -_-
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Thinking again about just how MUCH "I didn't know what to say" gives us and how it can change the whole deal. Because it is the only line that explicitly tells us that he is, as of the time of saying this, still not capable of saying "I love you".
She told him directly in the moment. So he knew what SHE wanted him to say. So how, then, is it possible that he "didn't know what to say"? Unless...
Unless he's saying that telling her was always completely off the table.
Unless he's saying that he knew what she wanted to hear and he knew that he would under no conditions be saying that. "I didn't know what to say". That statement is much closer to "I didn't know how to say it" than "I didn't know why I couldn't say it".
He doesn't say that he doesn't know what would have fixed the situation. He says that he didn't know what to say.
Which means: they are not. the same.
In that moment, with stakes of emotion and heartbreak and not life and death, he would never have told her he loved her. Something in him considers that an awful thing to do. Breaking a commandment he's made to her as a friend before all else. Something in him says "Telling you I love you would hurt you more long-term than letting you believe that I don't." (hmm I wonder why. which possible commandment could that be)
In episodes 4 and 5 of season 4, he does not say "I should have told her" "I should have told her". He says "should I have told her anyways?" "But what else could I have done but what I did?"
And it's the very prioritization that contributes to his guilt now. OH.
THAT'S SEASON 4 FOR HIM:
He spends the season asking himself the question: if I knew she might die if I didn't say it, would I say it, knowing it would break her heart if she survives?
And then she might die if he doesn't say it. And he knows it. And this is the climax. The moment of decision. The "what would I have done if I'd known".
Now he knows the answer, I suppose.
#I GET IT NOW#that's becoming a tag progressively#mike's arc isn't will or el#it's dilemma#and he gets new information and he sits with himself and thinks and maybe he changes#but he asks himself 'what would i have done if the situation repeated itself?' all season#and then the situation repeats itself#and he says 'this is an awful thing to do. but all i know is that she needed me and i wasn't there. and she needs me now. okay. i'm here.'#whatever he did he would have to live with#he just chose which guilt#mike wheeler#mike wheeler i love you#mike wheeler analysis#the ily speech#mike wheeler arc#stranger things#narrative analysis
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