#what's sams? haven't heard of it
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assorted psychonauts doodles
a close-up of this one, because i think it might actually be my favorite:
#still getting the hang of drawing them... i'm trying to find a good balance between the games' style and my own#i tried drawing them more in my usual style but i didn't like how they came out#and i have been wanting to branch out more with my art style so this is a good excuse to do that i guess#it's been fun! except for that one sketch of dogen. why does he have no legs i hate this#psychonauts#psychonauts 2#my art#guess what i'm actually going to attempt to tag everyone. because i hate myself#razputin aquato#lili zanotto#milla vodello#sasha nein#gisu nariman#<- my understanding is that that's what the art book confirmed? but since most people haven't heard yet i'll also tag#gisu nerumen#lizzie natividad#adam joseph gette#norma natividad#morris martinez#sam boole#frazie aquato#dogen boole
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You know how ahti and darling transcend control by appearing in/being alan wake 2 characters? I think with control 2 the opposite should happen:
Lame option: alan apparition (and alice's mentions) in the awe dlc was this
Neutral option: estevez is there (technically speaking she Is an alwake2 character)
Best option: Sarah Breaker my friend sarah breaker appears as an fbc agent and is a relevant character with dialogue and stuff
Intriguing option: Tim? Don't know.... how or why..... maybe he meets Jesse in the oceanview motel? Unclear
👁👁 option: among all the info of the blessed org you can find barry wheeler's tapes (an interrogation maybe?)
#I mean we're getting estevez for sure but that's a given bc She Works There. I want moooreeeee#tani's personal shit#please.......... we haven't heard barry's voice in 12 years....... rattling the bars of my cage @ SAM. RELEASE HIM#AND SARAH TOO PLS I MISS HER AND WANNA SEE MORE OF HER!!!!!#Tim is the last one I came up with btw bc man. What if we have a follow up on his situation?#Anyway now that I think abt it there are many characters that could appear BUT THE POINT IS. WHAT IF BARRY!#//GOODnight I'm sooooo so tired 😴
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I am (I am, I am at Aldi's) I am (I am, I am at Aldi's) I am (I am, I am at Aldi's)
#sam's talky talks#Sorry I haven't been rhe same after someone said that's what they heard LMAO#Shadow the Hedgehog goes to Aldi's real
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can we talk about the fact that chester started talking Unprompted. like. It's supposed to be that you click an item on their gay little case list right? and sometimes it'll be a talker. Sam was filling out Physical Paperwork and as soon as Celia walks away, Chester starts a-chattering. Sam didn't do SHIT. He even goes "what the hell" because YEAH MAN, WHAT THE HELL. I haven't heard much on That Bit yet. Like hello. Chester. Do you have something you'd like to share with the class that you can only do in borrowed words, king?
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kind of obsessed with the idea of dean and cas getting a house and sleeping in the same bed and building a normalcore life together, without ever officially getting together. cas comes back from the empty and dean hugs him, and after a few days he says they should get a house, so they do. they get a two bedroom and cas assumes it's so they each have their own room, but then dean picks one room as theirs, and says he thinks the other room will make a nice guest room for when sam and eileen/jack/claire come to visit. cas just goes with it. they always sleep in their pyjamas, and dean occasionally in his underwear when it's hot, so cas just figures they're friends who sleep in the same bed. dean has been so lonely his whole life, after all. dean sometimes puts on slow music and asks cas to dance, and cas is hesitant because he can't dance, but he figures dean needs casual touch and softness in his life, so he obliges. and then one day dean says "we should get married", and cas blue screens because he doesn't understand which need of dean's this is covering. his need for stability and family, perhaps, but he thought the house had been enough. so he just says "what?" and dean seems disappointed by that, and asks with a pout, "don't you want to?". cas is confused, but he answers honestly. "i do. i just don't understand why." dean seems confused too, but he presses on. "well, we've been together for almost a year now, and let's be honest we were basically together for twelve years before that, so i think it's time. plus i heard there are benefits, for like taxes and stuff. not that we pay that, but it could come in handy, i don't know." he searches cas' eyes, and cas' brain is going hold on a minute man. hold on a minute. dean asks again, "don't you want to?", and cas has to ask. "dean. when you say we've been together, what do you mean?" and dean is like, "i mean, like, dating? like a couple? right?" and when cas keeps looking at him with goldfish eyes he panics and goes, "oh god. haven't we? cas. we're together, right? i love you, you love me, all that? you haven't changed your mind on that, have you??" and cas about loses it like "what do you mean you love me??? when have you ever mentioned that?? dean, i thought we were just friends who lived together, i thought-" and now it's dean's turn to go "now hold on a minute man... you- what?? cas, we sleep in the same bed! we have breakfast together every morning! we've got a fucking garden!!" and cas just looks at dean stupidly and says, "but. we've never kissed? you sleep in your underwear! you've never said-" and he cuts himself off before he loses his damn mind because what??? so dean goes "oh. but you've been sleeping in pyjamas. and you've never tried to kiss me, or touch me. i tried it, with the dancing, but it was clear you were only doing it because i asked, so i didn't press it..." and cas does the goldfish bit a few more times before metaphorically shaking his head straight and saying "so, to clarify. we're a couple. and you think we should get married. and you want to kiss me?". dean laughs incredulously and says "yeah, pretty much. you okay with that?" and cas says yes. so dean kisses him. and wowza. cas would love to keep doing that forever. and well, apparently he can, because they're getting married.
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We should have gotten an episode in which someone tells Arthur that there was like a cute new barmaid/foreign traveler in the tavern.
Around that time some major events happen around magic which is why Merlin keeps disappearing so much.
Arthur connects the wrong dots and questions Merlin about it. Merlin tells him that it was just a good night with friends (he doesn't know about the new barmaid/traveler at that point). But all those friends say that they haven't been at the tavern that day. Even GWAINE.
So, Arthur goes undercover to spy on Merlin and his little 'date'. It had never bothered him before, but now that Gwaine mentioned something about that new person searching for a partner to settle down, Arthur is worried that Merlin might want to quit his job.
Problem is, the new person also happens to have magic, and Merlin found out and is trying to find out what their intentions are. So, he actually does go out with them once (casually) and they become friends.
Arthur learns that day that he's terrified of losing Merlin.
Arthur: Merlin, I heard you've made a new friend
Merlin: yeah. Sam. They work at the rising sun. I'm trying to help them get settled in. I didn't go there to drink, I promise.
Arthur: hmm... You plan on seeing them again?
Merlin: yeah.
Arthur: Do you like them?
Merlin: you know, I'm not entirely sure yet. Definitely more than you though, haha.
Arthur: *on the verge of panic already* You should be careful. New people in Camelot tend to be sorcerers quite often, you know!
Merlin: ... That doesn't mean they are all evil. Will was a sorcerer, remember? And I liked him very much.
Arthur: *having a complete meltdown* what?!
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DPXDC prompt: Valentine's day spirit. Superbat edition.
When Phantom sets foot on the Justice League base many years later, he expects anything but not Flash pointing finger at him and screaming about "legendary child who made Superbat canon".
~~~~
Being in Metropolis because of a ghost hunt right in the middle of a battle between Lex Luthor and Superman was not the best outcome, especially considering that Jack had his three-year-old son with him. But without such a combination of circumstances, they would never have found out that "Ghost!" "Daddy, no!" Ectoblast that Jack shot at the target of their hunt touches Superman and..really hurts him.
There were two sides to Danny-the ghostbuster's son and the astronerd. It is clear which half of him did not have a chance to win.
Danny threw his space rocket toy aside and grabbed father's arm. In the next second, boy had already sunk his teeth into Jack's fingers, forcing him to drop weapon. Youngling quickly jumped off and picked up ectoblast and then ran towards Superman. "Fly away! I'll hold him!" Danny stood up to try to cover up ghost (or alien?) in case Dad took not one but a whole bunch of shooting things with him again.
Jack: Get away from my son, ghost. Superman: Sir, I'm sure this is some kind of misunderstanding, I'm not a ghost. Jack: Danny, come to me, he's trying to hide his identity and manipulate us. Danny: No. If the heroes are being attacked, then someone must protect them too. Jack: But he's a ghost.. Danny: Alien or ghost is not so important, Daddy. He's in pain, and he's protecting this city, not haunting it. It's wrong to try to catch him for experiments. I forbid you to do that. Jack: Danny, champ, you're wrong.
Lex: Hah, what an interesting substance. Despite the other aggregate state, or rather its absence, it is so similar to kryptonite. Superman: Lex, is this a portable lab? Now is not the time, in case you haven't noticed. Lex: There is always time for science. I think my colleague will agree, right? "Similar to kryptonite?" Jack muttered to himself.
Jack: So Superman wasn't my target. And we are not colleagues. There is only one insanely rich man with questionable moral values with whom I am ready to do work, and your surname is clearly not Masters. Lex: It's a pity, but still, if you want to carry out the delivery of your wonderful weapons or exchange experiences, then call this number. Luther quickly shoves a business card into Fenton's hand. Jack*throws it away*: Come on, son, let's go back to the hotel, you've skinned your knees.
~~~The Evening. The Roof of the mentioned hotel~~~
"My friend Sam is also very frightening. And she also likes dark.“ The boy paused for a minute of thinking. “You want to kiss your goth friend?" "W-What makes you think that, kid. We’re colleagues, I respect him very much and.." "So you want to. It’s okay, I’d like to kiss Sam too but I’m afraid she’s gonna hit me. You have the same problem?" "It’s a little more complicated for adults." Kal begins to explain but stumbles upon Danny’s completely unimpressed look. Yeah, this boy apparently has heard 'kids would understand when they grow up' lectures at least thousand times. "But you’re basically right."
~~~~
When Batman himself comes to their hotel the next day as a representative of the Justice League to make sure that Mr. Fenton has no desire to harm Superman in the future and to tell that Superman is not going to press charges because of the ectoblast that injured him, Danny refuses to leave the room.
Jack: Oh, Danny, I thought you dropped your space rocket yesterday, it's a good that Alicia's Christmas present isn't lost. Danny: Well, dad, I left it on the roof of a bad bad man, yeah, but Uncle Kal returned it last night and we talked for a while. Jack: About what? Space, my little star? *Father immediately assumes that Danny would like to ask about everything real alien*. Boy*blushes and shakes his head negatively*: No, not about it.
Jack: Then what it was about? Danny: Secret superhero things. I can't tell you. I agreed to withhold that information as part of a pinky swear. Batman: And what about me, young man? You can tell me, right? Batman couldn't resist talking with such a cute kid. The boy thinks only for a second before hurriedly trying to push his father out of the room. Danny: Dad, come out for a minute and don't eavesdrop. I'll tell you when you can come in. The big man laughingly obeys. Lil child checks the reliability of the closed door and runs up to Batman. Danny: And so, Mr. Batman, first promise not to laugh or hit Uncle Kal. Batman: I promise? Danny: Good. This is very important information. Batman: I'm listening.
Danny: He thinks you're terrifying and wants to kiss you. And since he is afraid that you will hit him for this, I recommended him to appease you with a pie cooked according to his mother's recipe. Well, you know, since you love sweets and his parents' farm has the most wonderful apples in all states. He rarely cooks himself, but he will try for you, so even if he doesn't succeed, pretend that you liked it, please. Batman:...
Batman: Would you like to work in intelligence for the Justice League when you grow up? Danny: Actually, I want to be an astronaut. Batman: Our base is located in space. Danny:
Danny: Hmm, then I'll think about your offer.
Batman: Great. It's a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Fenton. You can count on a job recommendation from me. Do you want anything as compensation for your consultation? Danny: Actually, yes. Mr. Batman, tell me honestly, are you a bat on a frugivorous diet like Giant golden-crowned flying fox or you are a Vampire Bat? Sam says that such a big bat can only be a vegetarian and uncle Kal said your son was more than happy to steal strawberries from his garden with Superboy but..
~~~
Batman tries to behave naturally for a week. However, the sweet tooth inside him still makes him clamp Superman in the corner and question him. "Where the hell are the pies you promised to cook for me, Clark?"
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BUCKY'S SECOND FIRST TIME
bucky x fem!reader (smut with plot) no use of y/n
All of this... Bucky hadn't had time to think about when it would happen again, he didn't even think it would ever happen again. He didn't even think deserve to have that kind of intimacy with anyone, didn't think that anyone would want to be in that situation with him.
It's been decades and now his head was full of bizarre thoughts. He had nightmares every time he tried to get some sleep, so the idea of spending the night with somebody was completely out of the table. He was witnessing a complete stranger take over his friend's shield and identity. He had not crossed a name off his list of amends for weeks, he had not answered any of Sam's messages and his psychologist was putting more and more pressure on him.
But in all that chaos there was you who always showed him a kind smile, who always asked him how his day was when you saw him come into the bar, exhausted. You who had his favorite drink ready before he arrived and who looked at him with hearty eyes. You thought you were being too obvious but it had been so long since anyone had looked at him that way that he didn't even notice it.
The day he took Sam to your bar was when he realized, and not even on his own. You were thrilled that he finally introduced you to one of his friends (his only friend in fact) and Sam was so funny and he was always picking on Bucky which made their dynamic even more fun to watch. They arrived almost at closing time so it was just the three of you. That night you ended up closing two hours later, inviting them for a few beers and being walked home by the two of them since it was already very late at night.
—Dude, she's so into you —. Sam huffed a laugh while they walked back from your house.
Bucky arched his eyebrows in surprise and then frowned. —What?
—Oh come on, you gonna tell me you haven't noticed?
Bucky was getting more and more confused. —Noticed what?
Sam stopped on his feet and looked at Bucky in surprise. —Steve told me you used to be a heartthrob back in the day.
—Yeah, back in the day. When I was seventy years younger.
Sam rolled his eyes. —Two things. First, as much as I hate to admit it, you don't look a hundred and seven, and second, I can assure you that this girl is head over heels for you. —Bucky was silent, thinking, so Sam spoke again. —Ask her on a date.
So yes, he asked you out on a date. Well, if inviting you to his house for a drink could be considered a date. He didn't like to be seen in public places too much and fancy restaurants didn't go with him, so while he thought of something better for the second date, his house would work for this time. Bucky shook his head as he found himself thinking about a second date.
Bucky always tried to keep everything tidy, clutter annoyed him and made him even grumpier. But now as he let you walk into his house first he realized how empty it was. He barely had any furniture, only one chair, a small sofa, and a TV. He hadn't even bothered to buy a bed because he slept on the floor. He wondered what was going through your head when you saw his home.
—This is nice —. You stated. At first, you didn't realize how empty his apartment was, you were just appreciating that he had trusted you enough to take you to a place as private and intimate as his home. Then you did notice that some things were missing but you assumed that's all he needed.
Bucky was relieved when he heard those three words come out of your mouth.
You noticed how he kept his jacket and gloves on while he took out two glasses to pour you a drink. Whenever he came home the first thing he did was to take those two things off but with you there, it was different yet when he thought about it, he realized that it was fair that you knew and ran away if you wanted to. So when he caught you looking curious, he first got rid of his gloves, and you could already see the metallic fingers of his hand. Then he took off his jacket, revealing how the metal shaped his left arm.
—You're not going to ask about it? —Bucky thought he was getting ahead of you, saving you from the awkward moment of asking about what happened to him. He poured some liquor in the glasses.
—Do you want to be asked about it?
Bucky looked at you and shook his head. You nodded, understanding his decission. You figured he wouldn't want to talk about it, much less on a first date. Your question caught him off guard yet his answer came almost automatically. He didn't want to talk about it and it was the first time he had been given the option of not doing so.
The rest of the night went great. Bucky was very interested in everything you said. He didn't talk much yet you managed to get some information about him. He had a sister, his favorite fruit was plums, he enjoyed 40s music, and he was a cat person. Every time he told you something about himself, no matter how irrelevant it seemed, you found it fascinating.
You noticed that he was very observant, his icy blue eyes never stopped looking at you for a second. You found it cute, intimidating at times not knowing what thoughts went with those long, intense stares. His eyes were beautiful, captivating, so you could tell every time he broke eye contact to divert his gaze to your lips and then back to your eyes.
Each was on one side of his kitchen island, that way you could look at each other's faces while talking. You were leaning more and more on the table that separated you, taking advantage of the moments of laughter to get closer to each other until that way you kissed him.
At first, you felt him a little stiff even though the sigh that he had let out when you had finally kissed his lips told you otherwise. You parted ways. —Is this okay?
Bucky nodded and immediately after, he leaned in and pressed his lips against yours again. It had been so long since he had kissed anyone that he didn't know if his lip movements were being too clumsy, if the clash of his teeth with yours was bothering you, or if his tongue slipping past your lips was okay. He did not know how to control his breathing that's why he let out little moans against your mouth, trying to catch his breath without having to leave your lips.
He felt like a teenager again. The tingling sensation in his lower abdomen made him want to run away and hide but at the same time did not want to part from your lips for anything in the world. He was afraid of the way you made him feel but at the same time he didn't want that feeling to ever go away.
Didn't know how or when but he ended up sitting on his couch with you on his lap. Your lips and his had come into perfect synchrony and the kiss was getting deeper and wetter. Oh God and he wasn't gonna complain. Your hands were pulling from the root of his hair, your hips rolled subtly against his crotch, his right hand was resting on your hips. Bucky felt how his jeans tightened right where you were sitting.
Bucky tried to keep his left arm away from you, holding your body on top of his just using his right one. He was aware that the touch of the metal was not the most pleasant in the world. It wasn't soft, it wasn't warm, it was nothing like a flesh-and-blood hand.
—It's okay. You can touch me, James —. You moaned against his mouth. Yet he was still a bit reluctant to do so.
In the end, you would have to be the one to gently grab his metal arm and guide his hand to your waist. You kept your hand on top of his metal one while pressing down so he could hold you as tight as he was doing with his other hand, also to assure him that it was okay. You moved your hand from him once you felt his metallic fingers carefully close and grip your body. You smiled in the middle of the kiss, the firm grip of both of his hands encouraged you to grind harder against his crotch.
You pulled his t-shirt over his head and allowed your fingers to travel down his abs until you reached the button and zipper on his jeans. Bucky hissed at the sudden contact and held your hips tighter.
—Wait —. Bucky said against your lips. He pulled away and you were afraid that you had done something wrong. All you had to do was pull down the zipper, but your hands immediately stopped what they were doing when he spoke. You ran your tongue over your lower lip, already missing Bucky's, and you noticed how pink and swollen his were. —It's been a long time since I —. He confessed.
—Oh. —You said in a sigh. —We can't stop if you—
—No. I just— I just wanted you to know. —Bucky groaned. —I'm sorry. I've ruined it. —He let his head fall on your shoulder.
You giggled and you brought your hands to his cheeks so that he would raise his head and look at you. —It's okay, James. You've not ruined anything. I'm glad you've told me. —You gave a quick peck to his lips. —I was just saying that if you want to stop or need to slow down I'm okay with that.
—I don't want to stop.
—Good. Me neither.
And Bucky crashed his lips against yours again. You finished what you started and unzipped his jeans while he pulled from the hem of your shirt and threw it away. Bucky cursed and brought his mouth to the skin of your breasts, using his lips to suck and kiss on it and his teeth for small bites. You moaned and pulled harder from his hair, making him groan. His hands wasted no time and right after they were unbuttoning and unzipping your jeans while his mouth left a trail of kisses from your boobs to your neck and collarbone until he reached your mouth again.
Your lifted your hips from his lap so your hand could sneak inside his underwear. Bucky did the same with your panties. Your fingers wrapped around his hard dick and Bucky's found their way to your clit. You moaned and closed your eyes shut when he started rubbing your bundle of nerves and Bucky's lips parted and let out all the air that he had in his lungs when your hand moved painfully slow from the tip of his cock to the base of it.
You pressed your foreheads together. Your thighs closed around his hand but he continued drawing circles on your clit and his mouth reached for your lips again. Bucky's hips thrust into your fist while some of his moans died in your mouth. He felt a wave of heat running through his body and that sweet knot formed in his lower belly.
—I need you inside, please —You whined.
You didn't have to beg anymore. You moved from his lap so you both could get rid of your jeans and underwear. You straddled him again, using your hands on his shoulders for stability when your fingers brushed the scarred skin that connected with the metal of his arm.
You noticed the worried expression on his face. He was looking at you with his eyebrows raised as if he was waiting for a reaction from you. A reaction of disgust. He could feel his chest rise and fall slowly because of his deep breathing and he was wondering what was going on in your head at the time.
You pressed your lips against his one more time, your hands moved to cup both of his cheeks. —It's okay. Just focus on me —. You mumbled into his mouth and he hummed in response.
Without stopping kissing him, your hands began to travel down. First his neck, then his broad shoulders, feeling again those scars he was so insecure about, and then his arms. His right one was strong, with perfectly defined muscles and the softest skin. His left one was cold and hard, not at all unpleasant to the touch. Your lips moving on his kept Bucky from overthinking.
He gasped when you reached his well-defined abdomen. You would have spent the whole night caressing and feeling his body under your fingertips but you were getting impatient. Your fingers wrapped around the base of his cock to line it up at your entrance and gently lowered yourself. Bucky's mouth opened in a perfect "O" form as he gripped your waist tightly. You had to wait a few seconds to get used to the sensation before you started moving, he needed those seconds as well to get used to your tight walls squeezing him.
You started by rolling your hips against his, it was the best way to adjust to his size. Despite how wet you were you could feel that sweet sting caused by his width. You rested your forehead against his, you both were panting when you began to lift your hips and drop them back onto his cock. The sounds that came out of his mouth were music to your ears, the grunts coming directly from his chest made you vibrate.
You hugged him to feel him even closer. Bucky tried to hold on as hard as he could, he kissed your shoulder and softly sank his teeth into your skin there, getting a whine from you, but it was too much. Every time he felt his dick going fully inside you, the knot on his stomach became tighter, every time he heard you moaning his name in his ear he did his best to last a little bit longer but in the end, he found it impossible.
Bucky emptied himself inside you while he dropped his forehead on your shoulder and apologized for coming so quickly. —Don't worry. We have all night —. You played with the hair on the back of his head and allowed him to come back from his high.
And you spent the whole night until you heard the birds chirping. The stamina he had thanks to the super soldier serum was truly something else and he made it up to you until you felt completely disconnected from your own body and Bucky had to snuggle you next to him on the couch to let you sleep.
Bucky didn't sleep that night. He was afraid that if he did, he'd hurt you or scare you with his nightmares so he stayed awake all night, but he didn't mind either. He had his right arm around you and he held you against his body, your head was on his chest as well as one of your hands. He felt the warmth of your naked body against his under the blanket.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x reader#james bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#bucky fluff#bucky smut#bucky angst#bucky barnes fan fiction#bucky x you#sebastian stan#marvel#the winter soldier#winter soldier#winter soldier smut#marvel smut#marvel angst#marvel fluff#marvel fanfiction#tfatws#tfatws bucky
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BBB
Natasha Romanoff x Beefy!Sergeant!Reader*
18+ only read at your own risk
Word count: 3248
Requested by anon: Hi i love your work..you don't have to do this request if you don't want.. i was kind of was wondering since we haven't heard from Sergeant Nat and reader. If we could hear from them? I was thinking since Nat is always the confident reassured one in that universe like maybe something happens where shes not sure where she stand with reader? Like jealous or maybe reader lets one of her military friends borrow her laptop and they use it to watch porn...and nat finds it and thinks its reader. And nat kind of loses her mind in a way that we havent seen. (Not like crazy but for the first time shes like am i enough). And reader is high key oblivious bc she worships nat. Some communication to sort out and then smutty times. Only if you want. If not i look forward to whatever you post yay.
AN: *Reader has a penis, no pronouns used.
Thanks for the idea, anon! This was a lot of fun to write. :)
This is Part 5 in my Sergeant Beef series. Read the first one here.
“Hey, can I borrow your laptop?” Sam asks, poking his head into your room.
“Why?” You don’t even look at him, focused on you video game on the tiny television mounted to your wall.
“I dropped mine in the lake, so I had to buy a new one but it won’t get shipped off until later this week,” Sam explains.
“Okay,” you say, hardly listening to him as you race your little car across the screen to bump the giant soccer ball towards the goal. “It’s in my room on the–”
“I know where it is. Thanks.” Sam whisks in and helps himself.
“Close the door on your way out!” you call, just in time to hear the door slam behind him. Turning your whole focus back to your game, your fingers mash the buttons to a triumphant win.
***********************************************************************
A few days later, Natasha is over at your apartment. While the two of you had discussed a thousand times moving in together, you had always stalled or walked around the subject. Natasha wasn’t sure if it was because you were nervous what the public’s perception would be of your relationship, or if you preferred your own private space too much to give it up. Ever since the deployment, you had been more likely to retreat and hide away (even from Natasha) when you were upset or moody. She wondered if it was a side effect of your PTSD, but you never seemed ready for that conversation so she left it alone.
For dinner, you grilled some steaks (setting off the smoke detector in your apartment) while Natasha made a side of mashed potatoes and green beans. Afterwards, you went to take a shower while Natashas lounged around and found a movie on Netflix for the two of you to watch. She sits on the couch, opening your laptop and finding the web browser. She looks up Netflix and then browses through the recommendations on your home page, but none of them pique her interest.
She goes onto Google to search what other people are recommending and wades through a sea of titles and descriptions to find one. Swapping back and forth between tabs, she finds a website with a host of titles and flips back and forth until she finds a movie that is both on the list and currently on Netflix. But in the process, she loses track of the tab and accidentally closes it, silently cursing to herself, before going to check the history to find it again.
But what she finds in the history is not what she had been looking for.
Natasha feels almost scandalized when she sees the words “big busty blondes” in your search history, followed by a list of pornsites. While she knew you watched such videos in her absence, she didn’t know what genre you were into, and now a deep sinking feeling of insecurity fills her. She was not blonde, nor was she particularly busty after the years of hard workouts had shrank some of her assets a little. You always told her she had the perfect body, but now she wasn’t quite sure if she should believe you.
“Nat? Did you pick a movie?” You poke your head out of the bathroom. You’re not wearing a shirt and your wet hair is dripping water down your chest, emphasizing the lines of your muscles. Natasha can see the bullet scar on your ribs from the deployment that almost ended your life. But you walked away with every member of your team alive, and your tale of bravery had become something of a living legend in the community.
She knows you could have any woman you wanted. She had seen the way the recruits eyed you and how bold the other brass were with you. Before your promotion to sergeant, you were often overlooked and completely ignored. Natasha, perhaps a little selfishly, always considered herself the catch in your relationship: she was one of a handful of female sergeants with outstanding credentials, and looked great in and out of a uniform. But maybe she thought too highly of herself. You had developed into a very competent sergeant, were extremely good-looking, and had the most lovable personality anyone could ask for.
What if you didn’t want her anymore? What if you wanted someone younger, or someone you could start a family with? Natasha hadn’t yet disclosed to you her inability to have children, but if the subject ever came up, she knew you’d need no other excuse to walk away.
“Nat? Did you pick out a movie?” you ask again.
“Yes,” Natasha says. “We can watch Trolls.”
“Okay. That sounds fun.”
You come out in a sweatshirt with matching gray sweatpants and join Natasha on the couch. Instinctively, you put your arm around her shoulder and she snuggles against you, letting you rest your head against hers.
You seem to enjoy the goofy children’s movie, laughing out loud at the jokes and cheering when the main characters hug by the end. But Natasha can’t focus for a second, still thinking about the search history on your laptop. She didn’t even know if it was something she should bring up, but it was already eating her alive to think that she wasn’t good enough for you.
Natasha didn’t know if she would be able to survive without you. She would have to do everything she could to keep you by her side.
***********************************************************************
“Give me a sec,” Natasha calls, hurriedly slipping her boots on. She checks herself in the mirror one final time before opening her apartment door to see you.
“Hi, Nat–oh.” Your expression goes flat.
“What’s wrong?” Natasha asks, her stomach twisting in knots. Maybe this had been a bad idea.
“You dyed your hair,” you say, blinking at the short blonde hair she was now sporting.
“You don’t like it?” she asks, her worry growing by the second. She had dropped a significant sum at the salon on base to cut and dye her hair. Perhaps this had been a severe overreaction on her part.
“Oh. No, um, it looks very nice,” you stutter.
Natasha is not convinced in the slightest. Her face flushes red and she bites her lip to stop herself from crying in frustration. “That’s okay,” she mutters more to herself than you. “Where are we going again?” she asks, even though she knows every detail of the outing she had planned with you.
“The gym first, then we can get lunch and go grab groceries,” you list off, seemingly oblivious to her awkwardness.
“Yes, that’s right. Okay, let’s go,” she replies sullenly.
***********************************************************************
Natasha isn’t sure what else she can do to hold your attention after the hair dying incident. She tries to be extra doting with you, but all of her efforts seem to go completely unnoticed. You only say “thank you” once when she gets you your favorite chocolate bar from the commissary. The next time the two of you are in bed together, Natasha feels like she has to guide you through all the motions and you fuck her with a concerningly low level of enthusiasm. Natasha is convinced you’ve found someone else and just the thought of losing you makes her sick.
She’s nearly sent over the edge when she finally gets a text from you:
From Y/N: Can you come over tonight? I want to talk
Natasha feels like the rug has been pulled out from under her feet. Sweat breaks out on her forehead and her stomach starts to hurt like she had a bad meal. What if she just didn’t go to see you? Would you really still break up with her over text?
Her body seems to have a mind of her own as she responds:
To Y/N: Ok
***********************************************************************
“Thanks for coming over,” you say, welcoming Natasha into your apartment. She steps in guardedly, wondering if you’re hiding your new girlfriend under the couch. Or maybe she’s already in your bed. She shuffles down the hallway to subtly peer into your bedroom, which is empty.
“What did you want to talk about?” Natasha isn’t one to dance around the elephant in the room. Besides, she doesn’t want to draw this out any longer than it needs to be.
“Oh. Um…” You sound caught off guard. “Well, I was thinking that–”
“You want to break up with me.” Natasha can’t stop the tears forming in her eyes. She wipes them away, angry at herself for showing such weakness already.
“What? What makes you think that?” Your shock is so genuine, Natasha almost wants to believe you.
Natasha hides her face behind her hand. “I saw it on your laptop last week. The kind of porn you were watching–”
“Porn? I use incognito,” you say. “Unless that doesn’t actually hide things…” you add in a mumble.
“Your search history said you looked up…” Natasha takes a breath. “‘Big busty blondes,’” she repeats, hating the way the words sound off her tongue.
“What?” You sound confused now. “That’s…I don’t watch that kind of stuff. Wait, is that why you dyed your hair blonde?”
“No,” Natasha lies. “But I saw it on your laptop!” she insists, hastily changing the subject.
You pause for a moment, then start shaking your head with a chuckle. “I’m gonna rip him a new one,” you mutter. Then louder, you explain, “Sam borrowed my laptop last week because his was broken. I’m guessing he used it to…you know…” Your expression turns into one of disgust, and Natasha matches it.
“Oh. So, you’re not into big busty blondes?” Natasha is embarrassingly desperate for clarification.
“No, I’m not.” You take a step towards her and hold out your hands. “But I do have a thing for hot redheads who could totally kick my butt.”
“I know,” Natasha says, taking your hands and leaning up to kiss you. Her lips lift into a smile when you return her kiss with more passion than you had all week, wrapping your arms around her and pulling her flush against you. You dig your fingers into her thighs, lightly rolling your hips, and when she feels your hard bulge against her stomach and all of her doubts are cast away immediately. Her face burns in shame when she realizes how quickly she had jumped to the wrong conclusion. You weren’t going anywhere. You were totally in love with her and wanted no one else.
“Wait, so what did you want to talk about?” Natasha asks, trying to ignore the arousal building in her core as you hump her.
“Oh! Um…” Your face reddens, as if you’re so turned on yourself you forgot why you asked her to come. “Uh…I wanted to ask if…you would like to move in with me? Or if I could move into your apartment? Or we could find a new place together…”
Natasha feels like she’s gotten whiplash from the subject change. She had come here thinking you were breaking up with her, but instead you actually wanted to move in with her? Just when she had thought it was never going to happen.
“Why the change?” she asks.
You shrug your massive shoulders. “We spend so much time together as it is. And I was mostly nervous because you know I have those night terrors a lot, but…” You sigh. “I realized I get them a lot less when I wake up next to you.” Natasha wants to melt in your arms. “And it would be really nice if I got to wake up next to you every day. And eat every meal with you. And–”
Natasha cuts you off with a hard kiss. “Yes,” she pants, groping for the tie on your sweatpants and pulling them down. “Of course I’ll move in with you.”
“Nat,” you whine when she grabs your cock. She feels it throb in her hand and her arousal spikes. As high as her own sex drive was, there was little else that turned Natasha on more than to see how excited you were for her. She pushes you towards the bedroom and you understand without needing words, obediently sitting down on your bed and pulling you on top of her. You grunt when her weight lands on your thighs and Natasha immediately props herself on her knees; sometimes she forgets about the injury on your right thigh that still causes you pain sometimes.
“Sorry baby,” she whispers while leaning in to kiss your cheek. It had been a long and sometimes frustrating journey to get back to the same level of intimacy the two of you shared after the deployment ambush and your recovery. The medicines you were on had drastically affected your mood (and performance) and there were still some positions you could no longer do because of the strain it put on your body. But Natasha had been patient and gentle with you, even when all she wanted to do was fuck you senseless. Over time your strength and stamina had come back, and Natasha was thrilled you could still please her in bed.
She leans back and takes her shirt off while you mirror her. You’re almost back to your weight as before the deployment, but the physical therapy has encouraged you to work out even harder, so you are more muscular and toned than before. Natasha eyes your body hungrily, her hand reaching out to trace the scar on your ribs. While she hates the memory attached to your scar, she can appreciate how much more badass it makes you look.
“Nat,” you say, and she breaks out of her thoughts. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes.” She pushes you to lie on your back, rolling her clothed lower body against yours. “Everything is very okay.” Her hands skate across your warm skin, squeezing your biceps before resting on your chest, balancing herself as she rocks back and forth. Even though you’re still wearing boxers, Natasha can feel the hardness of your dick pressing against her butt.
“All ready for me?” she hums, digging her nails lightly into your chest.
“Always,” you respond, rolling your hips to match her rhythm.
“Hmm.” Natasha contemplates how she wants you today. You almost never call the shots in bed, but you have no problem with Natasha taking control most of the time. She likes how submissive you are to her and your willingness to please her even at your own expense. But she isn’t feeling selfish today and wants you to relax and enjoy too.
Her body seems to have a mind of its own as she humps along your abs, eventually pushing her panties to the side so you can feel her heat on your stomach.
“Nat,” you whine, gripping onto her waist to guide her movements.
“Just let me ride you,” she says, lifting off of you for a moment to remove her panties completely, and the two of you moan when she settles back on you. You flex your abs until Natasha swears she could grate cheese on them. She angles her hips back and widens her legs so she can drag her pussy along the ridges of your abs, smearing her wetness everywhere. “Fuck, you feel so good, baby,” she moans.
“So do you,” you say, your hands tightening around her waist.
Natasha moves her hips faster, sliding back until she can feel your cock practically poking a hole through your boxers. She’s just warming herself (and you) up and doesn’t want to rush to the main event. But as she hears your whines and feels the tension in your body, all she wants is for you to flip her over and fuck her until she can’t walk.
“Can you do exactly what I ask you to?” Natasha pants, the building arousal in her stomach almost painful now.
“Yes,” you gasp. “Yes, Sergeant. Whatever you want.”
The use of Natasha’s title makes her pussy clench around nothing. Her body aches for you and she’s done playing around.
“Good. I want you to get on your knees and fuck me,” she demands, abruptly climbing off of you and presenting her backside to you. You scramble to obey, wasting no time lining up your cock with her soaking pussy and pushing in eagerly. Natasha inhales sharply when your length stretches her out, filling her perfectly and reaching places she could never reach with her hand or a toy. When you start moving your hips, she whimpers and moans, gripping handfuls of the bedsheets so you don’t slam her into the headboard.
She spasms around you with every stroke, clenching tightly and trying to draw you in as deep as you can go. Natasha loves to hear you moan, knowing she was the cause of them, and more of her slick leaks out around your cock.
“Fuck, Nat,” you grunt, your thighs slapping against her butt with every thrust. “You always feel amazing.”
“Harder,” she begs. “I want you to cum when I do.”
“I’ll try,” you respond, your breathing ragged as you start to falter in your rhythm.
“Fuck, you’re in me so deep,” Natasha moans, wishing that despite your already above-average size, you had more to give her. She lets go of the bedsheets and slips her hand down between her legs, rubbing her clit for added stimulation. “Don’t you dare stop,” she warns, noticing the way your legs are shaking and your thrusts are losing their power.
“I won’t,” you whimper, and Natasha is not convinced you’ll be able to last much longer. Her hand glides back up to her stomach, where she can feel the bulge of your cock through her skin. That alone nearly sends her over the edge, but she has one more request from you.
“Bite me,” Natasha pants, motioning to her right trapezius muscle. Normally, she is very against you marking her during sex because she doesn’t want to worry about hiding them, but now she is panting at the thought of you finally staking your claim on her.
“Bite you?” you say, sounding extremely timid.
“Yes!” she growls, not wanting to repeat herself. “If you don’t bite me, I won’t let you cum.”
You moan and tighten your grip on her waist. Natasha feels your cock throbbing inside her, but she knows you won’t finish without her permission. The bed creaks as your weight shifts and she feels your chest press against her back as you lean over her. She hums in anticipation, feeling your breath across the back of her shoulder. Your teeth graze her skin lightly, your hesitancy obvious.
“Y/N,” she moans, pushing back into you and squeezing your length. “If you don’t fucking bite me–”
Your teeth suddenly clamp down sharply and Natasha keens, gushing around you and not even noticing you finish inside her. White spots of pure pleasure burst behind her eyelids and she feels cum drip down her thighs. It feels like she’s riding out the high forever, but when she finally unwinds, she feels your weight pressing into her back and a dull stinging in her shoulder. She twists her head to see the clear imprint of your teeth in her skin, the flesh reddening already.
“Sorry if that was too hard,” you say softly, as if you’re embarrassed by following her instructions.
“Nonsense,” she says, reaching behind her to cup the back of your neck. She pulls your head down against hers and nuzzles against your cheek. “Next time, you can bite me harder.”
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AN: Sorry to Sam lol
Please like, reblog, and comment! Follow for more content. 🥰
#natasha romanoff#black widow#natasha romanoff smut#natasha romanoff imagine#sergeant beef au#natasha romanoff x reader
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the thing about Dropout's transmisogyny problem in particular is that it seems to stem from the people at all decision making levels not having trans women as part of their worldview, literally forgetting we exist until we come into their vision actively.
like, let me put it this way. if i sat down to have lunch with brennan lee mulligan, i don't think he'd misgender me once. i think he'd be nice, and respectful, and listen attentively when i tell him what its like living as a trans woman and the difficulties that come with it. i really do! and then as soon as the conversation was over he wouldn't think about trans women again until the next time he saw one or heard about us. he wouldn't think of us when planning his games, when building his stories, or when casting his shows. so at the end of the day, yeah he'd be nice to me, but when he imagines the world, ANY world he can create, people like me do not feature in it unless we are already there for some other purpose, like to be someone's girlfriend, or to make a dick joke.
same with sam reich. when he goes into a casting phase, he and his team's rolodex (or perhaps i should say contact list to be more modern) is full of diversity! we can see it spanned across all the shows! except its strangely empty of one demographic and one demographic only. and when he does cast trans women, they're always drag queens first and trans women second.
there's something matt colville says when he finishes out some videos and livestreams, and while it may be pithy and chessy i think its relevant in this case: "imagine people complexly".
these people dont even imagine us, or consider us. to them, we don't exist, not because they don't believe in our existence, or they haven't seen it, or even because they actively hate us, but they simply dont consider it in any way until it is already presented to them. we are, quite literally, not a part of their vision of the world. how can we get them to imagine us complexly when they can't even imagine us in the first place?
#transmisogyny#not tagging dropout tags cuz ive heard how the fandoms respond to these discussions#bad. they respond bad.
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₂The Cameragirl² || snc
After an eventful night in the haunted asylum, you and the guys began looking at the footage, only for you to start making cocky remarks that might've set a spark you weren't expecting.
contains: just fluff and reader trying to be funny (but failing miserably), cheeky comments from reader, cursing, slight flirting? idk i suck at it
a/n: "part 2" of The Cameragirl, no need to read the first part though! but for context: you got choked by a ghost and you almost died but colby saved you by giving you mouth to mouth
[part 1] [part 2] [part 3]
word count: 2.3k
[u n e d i t e d]
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
You don't exactly remember when you fell asleep, you're just sure that right after you fell on your bed you were knocked out.
It wasn't something that happened often, but boy you were tired due to last nights events. Beause of that and because of your commonly terrible sleeping habits, Sam and Colby didn't even want to bother you much.
They did however check on you after they woke up hours later, making sure you were still breathing. The experience has somewhat made them paranoid about what could happen to you.
Although they cleansed you before returning, they'd much prefer to be one hundred percent sure you were alright.
The problem was, you were a light sleeper. After they finished checking up on you, your eyes opened up slightly. Groaning a bit from the ache in your body from the fall you had a couple of hours prior. You stretched yourself nonetheless.
Yawning, you sat down and rubbed your eyes. Taking your phone from your nightstand, you looked at the hour. 01:17 PM. Sighing softly, you stood up and fixed yourself up before walking out of the room.
Looking around, you heard mumbling from the other room. It was the office. You walked inside and saw them both looking back at the footage.
You furrowed your brows. Usually, you were a part of this process. Why did they begin without you?
Since they haven't noticed you yet, you started walking closer without making any sounds. As quiet as you possibly could, you basically stood behind them, watching the footage.
"What're you doing?" You asked, gaining a scream from Sam and a jump from Colby, almost falling off the chair. A smile grew wide on your face after that reaction.
"Fuck! You scared me!" Sam exclaimed, putting his hand on his chest.
"Oh my god, my heart." Colby said, hiding his face in his hands.
"That's for beginning without me." You said, crossing your arms on your chest.
"You were sleeping so soundly after all that happened, we didn't want to disturb you. And... we were curious... sorry." Colby admitted. You sighed.
"It's alright, I guess. What's this part?"
"We just started watching the part where... it happened." Sam said, looking at you.
"Ooh, okay. Then go back, my head's a little fuzzy, I can't remember clearly what happened, I want to know." As you said that, they nodded and ran back the video.
You didn't miss much anyways. They rewined right when they began arguing about it not being a good idea and whatnot. They haven't seen the whole night or anything, they just skipped right to the end.
After the arguing and the preparation for everyone to go into their respective corridors, the challenge began.
They paused the video. "Even though it made sense, it was still strange for you to be so persistent about it, was it not?" Colby said, looking at you. "Also, can you please sit down? There's a chair right there. You're stressing me out."
"No." You quickly answered.
"Why?" He asked.
"I don't want to, it's my fight or flight mode. It's easier to run while standing up." You giggled softly, which gave them both a sense of peace that you couldn't even imagine.
You were their everything, and thinking that their everything could've ended up like that made them so overprotective that they would've absolutely slept with you that night... to keep you protected, of course.
"Also, my legs feel numb, I don't want to cut the circulation again, it felt weird last time." You admitted.
Sam quickly stood up, concerned. "Are you okay? Do you need an oxygen mask again or something?? Water?"
"Wha- no. Calm down. Jeez." You said, grabbing his shoulder and making him sit back down. "Anyways, about the video. Um... I do remember having this urge to do it. I don't think it might've been anything bad, but I did have this... feeling, I guess."
"Maybe it wasn't you?" Colby said, raising a brow. "Maybe something was making you feel that way, just so that you were left alone... like it happened." You thought about it.
"I... guess it's an option." You shrugged.
"It could've also been a possession. It is said that people tend to quickly switch emotions when one is possessed." Sam continued. "Or... it could've also been the fact that you were so indifferent about it all."
"I'm just used to it, it's not like I don't believe."
"Yeah, but since we were making our reactions so... extra in comparison, maybe the spirits were trying to target you?" Colby added.
"...yeah, it does add up. Well, continue. Let's see what truly happened. I genuinely can't remember." They nodded and the video rewined.
As you began walking through the corridor, you began to speak on the video, it was almost automatic when you heard your voice that you started whining. "Oh, fuck no. Nevermind. This is so cringe. I remember this."
They started laughing and kept on watching although you pleaded for them to skip it. You tried to stop it yourself but Sam quickly held you back, hugging you and your arms, unable to move.
You didn't have the strength at the moment to try and get out of his grasp, but you tried anyways.
Not like it mattered. Not like you minded, actually. In the way he was holding you back, he basically let you sit on his lap while watching.
You didn't mind at all.
"You guys know I suck at youtube, I was trying to be funny, it didn't work." You laughed a little bit while your voice also seemed on the edge of breaking, mainly fake crying.
"What do you mean? You did great." Colby said, hiding his smile underneath his hand. Listening to your cute attempts on making jokes. It melted him.
"I can see you trying not to laugh, Colby." You fake cried again.
"Whaaat? I would never." He said. Sam didn't hide anything. His smile only giving away how much he was actually enjoying this version of you. If only you were open enough for them to be able to record and replay more of this.
A couple of minutes into the video, you started panting, heavy breathing could be heard. It was when you began to explain that you could barely breathe. "It feels... hard to breathe." You said in the video, your lips visibly shaking.
As you began walking faster, you could see through the video that you stopped on you tracks. Blinking your eyes as you looked at, what you remembered to be, a figure.
You tried to breathe.
"Holy shit. Holy shit! Did you see that?" Sam said, letting you go and pausing the video and quickly going back a couple of seconds. You stood up from his lap to let him search quickly.
"What?" Colby asked. Confused, you got closer. He started playing the video once again, this time, slower. You could see the light on your neck moving.
"Holy fuck. Look at that. It looks as if something is like, pushing on your neck. Like pressing onto as if you're getting choked." Sam explains, pointing at the marks on your neck where there seemed to be a dent suddenly forming.
"Oh my god." You said as you touched your neck, remembering what happened barely a couple of hours ago. Colby had his mouth wide open after watching that.
"That's... that's poltergeist activity right there. It's undeniable." He said, looking at the both of you. You nodded, shocked at how much power this entity seemed to have. "We need to get you properly cleansed, we can't be having another demon up someone's ass." He contined, looking directly at Sam, who seemed offended. You chuckled.
As they continued the video, they heard the soft 'help' that you could barely spit out, your voice breaking in the midst of it. The quick movement of the camera as you turned around only to be thrown to the floor. Seconds later, watching as you tried to crawl back but your body seemingly giving up as quickly as you tried to do so.
It broke their hearts, even more so knowing you tried to scream for help. And so, the camera kept rolling for what felt like an eternity.
"How long did it took for you guys to come look for me?" You asked, seeing as the video kept going.
"So far, it's been five minutes..." Sam said softly, painfully watching the screen.
"Oh my god, I was dead for five minutes?"
"Don't say it like that." Colby looked at you, almost sad. Fear went through his body at the thought of not have gotten there on time.
"It is true though... oh, there are my heroes." They smiled softly as you said that. As you heard the conversation they had while you were unconscious, you scoffed. "You guys thought it was a joke?"
"Hey, listen. We've had our jokes and giggles with extreme pranks before, it could've been a possibility." Colby put his hands up in defense, looking at you truthfully. "Honestly, I was wishing it was."
"Sam. Call 911. This is real." Colby said on the video. Before you could completely understand what was going on, you saw him kissing you.
Well, saving your life, but touching lips nonetheless.
Your cheeks started switching colors. You obviously don't remember much, but your brain didn't thought about the fact he had to give you some oxygen back.
Your fingers touched your lips softly as you were watching. They seemed to be immerse on watching what happened, thankfully. You don't think you could handle their stares right now.
Trying to calm yourself down, you saw yourself waking up. No further from that, you saw as Sam helped you up for a split second before the camera was turned off.
"And that's the footage alright. Wow." Colby sighed and looked at Sam, and then at you.
"That was... something. I can't believe we caught that on camera... it's proof, yeah, but... you were seriously hurt." Sam says, looking at you. "Are you... okay with this?" He asked, you looked at him, confused.
"What? You mean for posting it? Oh yeah, I don't mind. Don't worry about it. I'm safe and sound anyways." You said, smiling as you put your hands on your hips.
"Just making sure you're okay with it." He said and you nodded, understanding his kind gesture.
"So..." You began, gaining the attention of them both. "Are you gonna keep the part where Colby kisses m- uh, gives me mouth to mouth?" You quickly correct yourself, trying to act cool. Not leaving your stare from the screen.
"What?" They smirked at your sneaky comment.
Fuck.
"What?" You asked back looking at Sam, seemingly ignoring their cocky smile as much as you could.
"What did you say?" He asked.
"If you're gonna keep the mouth to mouth on the video."
"Not that, when you stuttered." Colby obliged, making you nervous.
"...I said Colby?" You raised an eyebrow, looking confused although you perfectly knew what they were talking about. They shook their head.
"You know what we mean." Sam says, reclining back on his chair, getting comfortable as he looks at you, amused by the situation. Mimicking Sam's actions; Colby lied back, a hand underneath his chin, smirking back at you.
Like Gods. They looked like Gods.
It was driving you insane.
You sighed, "I'm just saying. A bit upset that that was my first kiss with any of you- I mean, not like I was... waiting for one anyways, of course. Ahem." You started mumbling at the end, looking away while scratching the side of your neck.
It wasn't anything strange for all of you to have some sort of stupid flirting in between conversations, but usually they were extremely noticeable jokes.
These? Oh. These weren't jokes. These were genuine mistakes.
And a part of you hated these silly accidents. Mainly because they knew.
"There seem to be a lot of mixed signs in what you're saying." Colby said, smiling at Sam then looking back at you. "I'm a bit confused in what to believe here."
You shrugged. "Believe what you want to believe, good sir."
"It's just that I don't know if we're on the same page, you know?" Colby continued, looking at Sam. "I only know he's with me."
"Oh, for sure." The sexual tension only filling the room even more. Usually, the jokes were seemingly too overboard and hence, you could tell they were that, plain jokes.
Usually.
Just like your silly little mistakes, these weren't jokes.
"And what does that mean?" You raised an eyebrow.
"Oh, we know what we want. We don't know if it is what you want though."
You sighed heavily, seemingly loosing yourself for a moment as you whined. "Dear God, why are y'all so hot?" You looked up, dozing out of existence after thinking about their looks, their positioning, their everything.
.
.
.
Wait.
Wait.
WHAT DID YOU JUST THROW OUT OF YOUR MOUTH?
You accidentally said your thoughts out loud.
How does that even happen?!
When you realized what you've done, your eyes went wide, quickly looking at them. "Oh. Fuck. I didn't just- oh God." You didn't even wait to see their reaction as you began walking away. They quickly stood up, and you quickly sped up.
You started laughing but you were absolutely dying inside out of embarrassment. "Come back here!" Sam yelled as he got a hold of you and hugged you from behind, quickly throwing you over his shoulder.
"Let me gooo!" You yelped, moving your legs as you laughed purely by reflex. He held your legs in place. You were blushing hard.
"Nu-uh. We're gonna have a chat, young lady." Colby said, crossing his arms as you looked at him with a pout on your face. Sam turned around and slapped your ass, walking back to the room. You yelped, not expecting the sudden movement.
"A nice, long chat." Sam said as you sighed.
Oh boy. It's gonna be a long night.
✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹 ⋆。°✩
how do you guys like the banner? i got creative(ish)
also pls tell me what you thought about the fic, cause i don't really know if i did good with the idea, i did want them to review the footage but i also wanted a bit of tension or something extra to make it spicy, i'm not sure if i did a good job tho...
thank you for reading!
-nikkõ
smol taglist: @lemonnightmare @yourfavoritefangirl @stardollswrld
#they're basically gods#colby brock#sam golbach#colby x reader#colby brock imagine#colby brock one shot#colby brock fanfic#colby brock x reader#colby brock x you#imagine#fanfic#fic#one shot#sam and colby#sam and colby one shot#sam and colby fanfic#sam golbach x reader#sam golbach x you#sam golbach one shot#sam golbach fanfic#sam golbach imagine#angst#sam and colby fluff#sam and colby imagine#fluff#flirting
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This is my saga. (Transcript below images, behind the cut)
Transcript of a text message exchange between me and a few friends.
Me: My local Domino's sucked so bad last time they delivered to me that I stopped ordering from them like a year ago. Decided to get a pizza tonight and give them another chance…they no longer exist.
I then share a screengrab which states that my order was placed at 4:13pm today, but that Google's little preview window lists it as "Expected by January 9, 2024". This will be humorous later.
Me: Ordered from Little Caesars instead. They say my pizza will arrive sometime in the next four months. Also my delivery driver has been waiting to pick up my food for over 30 minutes. So they might not be wrong.
Friend K: Are you…cursed, Sam?
Me: Delivery driver bailed and was replaced with a new driver but when that happens the tracker doesn't understand what's going on, so now I'm watching my old delivery driver just drive off towards wrigleyville.
Friend K: NOOOOOO MY PIZZA
Me: As far as I know they still haven't made it. Nobody's picking up at the restaurant.
Friend C: You're gonna get a random pizza in four months.
Friend K: You'll be on your 734,845th driver by then.
Me: So the first driver was there for 30 minutes, got fed up, told the app the store was CLOSED, and left. Second driver heard the store was closed and didn't check, just left himself as the driver because he couldn't cancel an order at a closed restaurant. THIRD DRIVER has just arrived and confirmed the store is open but in the weeds. The pizza I ordered at 4:15 is arriving at 6pm, but I did get a refund because of the late delivery.
I then share a screengrab which shows the Doordash "tracker" map with a bold text header reading Your Order Was Cancelled. There is a large "top hat" emoji covering downtown Chicago so you all can't see my address in the app.
Me: …or this could happen.
Friend C: No pizza for u.
Me: I literally haven't ordered any food delivery in months because it just wasn't worth the hassle every time. This time I was like "maybe if I just chill it'll be fine." This is like the time I ordered Papa John's and they called me to break the tragic news that they were out of pepperoni.
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Inside and Out...*starts sobbing*
#sam's talky talks#Not one of my favorite songs from the Danganronpa Musical. But it definitely got the tears flowing#I haven't heard that song since the one time I listened to it when I was listening to the entire thing#I forgot what rating I gave it#hope despair musical
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Hi, I was thinking Jacob Black x Reader. Where Jacob was waiting for Reader to come out of school till he heard commotion in front of the school and saw Reader fighting a bully who is a guy. She has a bruised lip and bleeding nose. Jacob hurriedly pick up Reader and take her to Emily’s so she can chill out and so Emily can patch her up. The pack saw her and they started asking questions till Emily started lecturing her.
Jealousy and Pack Scolding's
Pairing: Jacob Black x Uley!reader
Characters: Jacob Black, Uley!reader, Paul Lahote, Jared Cameron, Embry Call, Leah Clearwater, Seth Clearwater, Quil Ateara V, Brady Fuller, Collin Littlesea
Warnings: Angst, fluff, Paul being an idiot, Sam not liking the imprinting, this was actually kind of cute, I think I made Jake a likable character (for me), Emily is an angel, Sam and Emily are my fav, reader has avoided making eye contact with Jake bc she has a crush, Sam knows whats up, Embry just wants his imprint, Paul is such a big brother here, love writing for the wolfpack, it's so much fun, reader knows about imprints
Word Count: 2,431
A/N: Ask and you shall receive... this was fun and totally not inspired by Jake fics where he's a little jealous shit
I've aged probably everyone sooo, Sam is 26, Emily is 25. Leah is 23. Jared and Paul are 19 (in a nearby community college) and just one semester from graduating. Jake, Reader and Embry are 18. Quil, Seth, Brody are 17. Cam and Seth are 16
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He kicks his bike stand up, so it stays upright while he waits for you to exit the school. He crosses his arms, not wanting anyone to talk to him, hoping he looks “menacing” enough for his classmates to get the hint and steer clear of him.
He knows Quil and Embry made their way back to Emily's since Sam wants them to do their patrol shift as soon as they can once they finished with their last class.
He couldn't complain much considering he was able to go home and change before heading back to pick you up so he could successfully switch shifts with Embry, which annoys him since Sam basically ordered him to pick you up.
He’d be more okay with it if you two were friends- or even talking; he doesn’t know why he was put to the job since you two aren’t close- or at least, compared to Jared and Paul.
Jake did recently find out (after complaining to the guys when their alpha wasn’t around) you’re Sam's niece and Emily has taken a light to you, thinking of you as her own daughter.
And the only reason he thinks that is because of how she treats you; it always reminds him of the way his mom took care of him and his sisters when they were younger.
Don't get him wrong, he has no problem with that or the way she treats you, he's more curious than anything since you haven't been talking to him.
It kind of bugs him that you talk to Paul and Jared more than him and isn't sure why. He gets the two shifted before everyone, but you've started talking to Embry and Quil so why not him too? Hell, you’ve even started making small talk with the newest shifters Brady and Collin.
He thinks this is why Sam sent him here, so he'll stop moping around about you and not just because the pack is tired of hearing how sad he is with you not talking to him.
The chanting, "fight, fight, fight," overtakes his sense in waiting for you and he steps closer.
He stops behind the wall of people, checking on who's fighting, curious as to who's stupid enough to fight on school property.
The fist flies to your face and he starts fighting his way to get past the people blocking him from getting to you.
You spit, not wanting the copper taste to remain in your mouth. You turn your head back to David, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of feeling like he won.
You kick his upper thigh, right above his knee and knock him down before pulling your arm back and drive your fist as hard as you can into his cheek.
He falls and cups his cheek, whining about the pain and the fact that he's bleeding.
"Talk about my family again and you'll be bleeding more."
Jacob finally breaks through the crowd and pushes David's friend away before the guy could grab you. "Back off," he growls.
The friend raises his hands in defense and backs away, noticing how buff he'd gotten and knows better to not fight Jacob.
He turns to you, smelling blood on you and cups your face, searching to find the damage, ignoring your eyes as the blood from your lip drips further down your chin. "Come on."
He puts you on the back of his bike and starts it before kicking the kickstand.
-
You unwrap your arms and get off the bike, trying to put distance between you, Jacob, and your home.
He grabs your wrist, "where do you think you're going?"
"Away."
"Just because you want to hide your face from Emily and Sam, doesn't mean you can run away."
"I can still try." You tug on his arm. "Let me go."
"No, you need to go in there and face them."
You stop fighting and he lets go of you, trusting that you won't leave. "I don't want Sam to be disappointed."
"Did you pick a fight with David on purpose?"
You shake your head, "of course not."
"Then he won't be disappointed... as long as you talk to him."
"Says the guy who fights him every chance he gets."
That earns a chuckle from Jake. "Says the mousy niece."
You scoff, shoving his arm. "Hey, I'm not mousy."
"This is the longest conversation we've ever had."
"That's your fault, you're always mopey."
"I am not."
"Are so."
"Am"- You walk through the door.
Emily's voice interrupts yours and everyone else's conversations. "I'm happy to see the two of you are talking." She smiles with a twinkle shining in her eye that quickly dies as soon as she catches sight of your face.
"Oh my- what the hell happened to you?" She grabs your chin, tilting so she can look at your face. "Who did this?"
Paul tenses, Jared tries to see over her shoulder.
Embry and Quil walk through the back door and glance at one another with concern evident on their faces once they realize what’s happened.
"Don't tell, Sam," you reply, staring into her eyes, practically begging her not to tell him.
"Don't tell me what?"
You grimace and then wince because your adrenaline has worn off and the pain has surfaced. "How much I love you?" You say without turning.
"I don't buy it." He wraps an arm around Emily, pecking her cheek. "Did you cut your finger again?" He asks with the scent of blood wafting through the room.
"Uh-" She catches your eye as she glances down at her hands. "Maybe, I don't know."
You attempt to sneak away while he's distracted and fail.
"Turn around."
You pout, keeping your head low as you turn.
"Lift your head."
"I like staring at my shoes while they're clean."
He grumbles your name under his breath.
You lift your head and sigh. "I may have gotten into an altercation at school."
"What the hell happened?"
"That's what I was asking before you got here?" Emily chimes in. "And I was avoiding it then."
"What did you do?"
You scoff, "I didn't do anything, you dick."
"That is no way to talk to your uncle," she tells you.
You stare at her, "I'm going to give him the same respect he gives me," and turn to him. "Which is none."
You exit the room when you realize none of you are going to be able to have a proper conversation and make your way to your room, slamming the door behind you.
-
"What happened while you were waiting for her?" Sam towers over Jacob, attempting to search through his mind to figure out what could have happened.
"I don't- I don't know. I was waiting and then I heard the other kids chanting, fight and then I saw her get hit and then take down David-"
"Wait- she was fighting David?" Jared chimes in with a smile.
"He deserves it," Paul adds.
"Guys a grade A asshole," Embry says before snacking on a muffin.
"So, this fight was valid?" Sam asks, wanting to understand everything he's learned within the last five minutes.
"No, it wasn't valid because fighting isn't the solution, is it boys?" Emily turns to the boys at the table.
"No," everyone answers.
"Good," she smiles.
"But this hasn't happened before? What's happened? This David- or whoever clearly said something for her to act out."
"He was talking about my family," you tell them, leaning against the wall with your arms crossed.
"That doesn't give you enough reason to fight," she tells you.
"It does when they start making fun of your dead parents and uncle who's running a cult."
They purse their lips.
"How do you feel?"
You shrug, "my fist and face are aching, so I'd say I did something right."
She sighs. "Fighting isn't the answer."
"I know that!"
"Then why did you do it?"
Your emotions cause you to snap. "I was tired of him thinking he could still bully me!"
She takes a few steps closer to you. "This has been going on for a while now. Why didn't you tell us?"
"I didn't want either of you to walk into the principal's office thinking you could stop it when it'd only make things worse," you grumble.
"We could have found another way to stop him from making comments."
"I took care of it the only way I could."
"There's always more than one way-"
"I know," you run your fingers through your hair in a frustrated manner. "I wasn't thinking but he wouldn't shut up. He waited a few months, giving me a grievance period but then he started talking shit again and today he wouldn't leave me alone."
"Why didn't you tell us?" Jared asks.
"Yeah," you scoff, "because I wanted you guys to help when the hothead is one fight away from being expelled. Everyone still thinks those two," you point to Embry and Quil. "Are weird because they suddenly got buff and had a haircut. Don't even mention the fact that Jake along with Brody and Cam are the new talk of the pack."
Sam sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. "Just, go clean the blood off as best you can, and Emily will wrap your wounds."
"I already did."
"Then go get the first aid kit and bring it in here."
You walk back into the bathroom throwing everything you’d laid out on the counter back into the bag and aim for the kitchen. "Heal me with your magical powers, Em."
She smiles and wraps an arm around your shoulders as she guides you to the island so she can use the natural light to check over you. "Does this hurt?"
"Not yet."
"Okay, let me know when it-"
You suck in a deep breath through your teeth.
"Hurts. You okay?"
"Peachy, Em."
"I know you had to defend yourself today, but fighting isn't always the answer."
"Yeah, I know," you reply with an attitude.
"I'm just reminding you, so you don't continue hurting yourself. You're not like the others, and I don't like seeing you get hurt."
"Thanks, Emily," you wrap your arms around her and pull her in for a long hug.
She smiles, returning the hug. "Don't go getting into fights again or else I'm going to bubble wrap you."
You chuckle. "As long as you save me from a Sam lecture."
"Deal." She slides the plate with muffins, closer to you. "Eat something first."
The guys shake their heads at your behavior.
"Does this mean I can hang out with you guys?"
"You hang out with us already," Jacob points out.
"Cliff diving." You unwrap your muffin.
"Absolutely not," your uncle tells you.
"Come on."
"No,” Sam shakes his head.
"Guys," you beg, turning around to look at the others.
"We're not getting involved in that," Paul raises his hands, heading towards the couch.
- Extra -
"Wha-"
"I'm with Paul," Embry tells you, pulling Quil with him as they sit beside Jared.
You turn to face your knight in shining armor. “Jake-”
He turns away from the others and glances back at you, the humor falling from his face.
“Oh, shit,” Jared mutters.
“Are you serious?” Embry whines.
You owlishly blink trying to figure out what’s happened when he falls to his knees. You set your muffin down and push yourself off the stool to stand in front of him. You poke his shoulder. “Are you okay?”
“It’s you,” he mutters.
You raise your head and face the others with a scared and confused expression. “Guys, what the hell just happened?”
Paul smirks and looks away.
Jared buries his face with a muffin.
Embry and Quil face the tv, not wanting to see how things plays out.
Brady and Collin walk through the door.
“Holy shit,” the former says.
“Congrats, Jake. You finally got your imprint,” the latter adds.
“What?” You spin around to face Emily. “Imprint? That’s what just happened?”
Sam rubs a hand over his face. This was the last thing they needed.
“Did we- did you not know?” Brady asks you.
“Does this look like the face of someone who’s in the know? Does it. Brady?”
Collin pulls his buddy away before you can rip their heads off.
“I think we need to talk,” Sam says, pulling Jacob off the ground. “Outside.”
You three stand on the porch, trying to wrap your heads around the whole situation.
-
“I don’t know what this means,” you tell them.
“This means, no being alone in your room. No sneaking out after curfew. No-”
“Sam, we’re not dating. This doesn’t apply to us.”
“It could,” he says, finally snapping out of his mind.
“What?”
“It- the imprint bond doesn’t happen by accident, it’s the joining of when two soulmates find each other.”
“So, we’re soulmates?”
He nods.
“I thought you were in love with Bella?”
“I was.”
“And now you’re not? You couldn’t have moved on that fast just because of this bond.”
He sighs, “I know this is going to be a lot of work, but I want to get to know you whether we go out or not… even though dating you-”
The clearing of someone’s throat cuts him off.
He sheepishly smiles, rubbing the back of his head. “We’ll talk more later.”
You can’t help but giggle and wince soon after.
He’s kneeling in front of you in seconds, searching for any sign of pain. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. My lip is going to be the kill joy of my existence for a few days but I’m fine.” You place a hand on his shoulder, “thanks for pulling me out of there when you did.”
He shakes his head, “it was nothing.”
“It was more than you know, and I know you were only there because Uncle Sam made you, but I still wanted to thank you.”
He can’t help the wide smile that stretches across his lips. “I’ll always be there for you.”
-
Sam throws you over his shoulder. “Babe, where’s the extra wood I keep for the winter?”
“Back room, why?” She asks, watching as you beat on his back.
“I’m locking some doors.”
“Sam, no!” You screech. “Boys, help me.”
“He’s the alpha, what he says go,” Paul tells you.
“You suck, Lahote.”
“You’re gonna be swallowing, princess.”
Paul has never shifted and ran out of his alpha’s place as quickly as he did today.
The others lose their minds as he runs all around, nearly bumping into the clearwater siblings as they head towards the place.
-
Tag list (if you'd like to be added or removed, don't hesitate to ask)
@kmc1989 @gilbertgirl13
#twilight#twilight wolfpack#twilight fanfiction#twilight fic#twilight fanfic#twilight x reader#jacob black#jacob black x reader#jacob black x you#jacob black imagine#jacob black imagines#jacob black fanfiction#jacob black fanfic#jacob black x uley!reader#jacob black x fem reader#jacob black x fem!reader#jacob black x female reader#jacob black x female!reader#twilight x you
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Resuested by @outof-spite : was wondering if you could do a winchester bros & little sister! reader where theyve been arguing constantly lately, and reader is usually combative and always argues back but, this time shes just over the arguing so she just gives up trying to argue with them and kinda goes mute?
Warnings : family fights, yelling
Pairings : Sam/Dean Winchester x sister!reader
A/N : Sorry for the late postt ❤️❤️
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Things happen, right? Misunderstandings, judgement, reproaches and blame, all of them, the worst thing that could happen to a family, more importantly-right now-to yours.
Back from a hunt gone bad, you heavily lay in the backseat of the impala, your feet hung over the left window while your head rests over the opposite side of the car.
"Hey-get your feet off my damn leather." A complaint you've heard one too many times, and one you usually fight but- this time, as a sigh leaves your lips, you uncross your legs and bring them down, consequently lifting your upper body to sit up. An avertion from your side that's different from your usual habits, causing the car to fall into heavily loud silence.
And although it is loud with almost audible thoughts and anger, you still enjoy that while it lasts.
And it fucking doesn't last, in fact, just as soon as you entered the motel, another sentence commenced by Sam sent Dean into a fury, and just as things heated up, you found yourself in the middle of it all-again-
"Hey!!-" The shout is directed at you, this you know and choose to disguard. You would answer but- your body is fatigued and so is our mind, answering seems to lead to no vail. You answer, he fights you, you all go to sleep and wake up forcebly normalizing things, as if your throats aren't sore and your brains aren't fried.
"Hey-i'm talking to you-"
The words sound more bitter this time around, and you find yourself reluctantly lifting your gaze up . You look at Dean, slow and undetermined, exhausted.
"I asked you why you did that-You could've waited for us. I know you said there was no time le-" Dean pauses. "And fucking answer me when i talk to you-"
You shrug, causing a choking gasp out of Dean. His eyes widen and he leans forward. "Are you-Is she provok-are you-"
You throw your jacket over the bed, disdain discerned in your every move and you flop on the bed, unaware of the sudden tension that-again- suddenly settles in.
But the thing is--You don't care anymore. You haven't enough energy to get you to fight them once more, neither to explain or defend yourself. Too damn fucking tired is what you are at the moment-Too damn tired of it all.
"Kid?"
You rest your hand over your forehead, closing your eyes in an effort to soothe your aching muscles, and maybe suck in a little more patience.
"Kid."
Your stomach tightens and soon, you'll recess into a bawling mess, so you get off the bed and pick up your jacket.
Please don't lead to another fight, please..You just want it all to be ov-
"What's wrong?"
You shrug once more, shaking your head to motion that all is fine before heading for the door. But Sam comes your way, blocking the door and you blow a long sigh.
"Come here"
Sam grips both of your arms and swiftly-you find yourself glued to his chest. But all happens all too fast-why would he suddenly get all feely- and before you even realize it, you find yourself pushing against him.
"'im sorry-i'm sorry."
A lump builds up in your throat and as flashes of the past few weeks occupy every single space in your brain, your breathing increases-just as it gets harder to breathe. Just the thought of it all_
Your eyes are slowly flooded with warmth, announcing the tears gathering at your eyes. You need to leave. You need to go.
You choke on a sob.
You can't do this anym- "I know, honey. I've been there. I know." And with that, another sob loudly escapes your throat and a whimper follows.
"i've been there with Dad, i didn't realize we were doing that to you-i'm sorry. I see you. I really am sorry."
You shake your head as your cries fill the room, getting increasingly louder the harder Sam rubs your back. But that's not what you need. Not for them to see you-but for them to fucking stop.
"We'll stop. We'll talk. I promise."
You pull away from him, skeptical of a promise you doubt he can hold. And just as you're about to process that, Dean speaks.
"I'm sorry too." His honest tone makes you sigh. This isn't.what.i.want.
"Sam and i are sort've used to it- we lost sight of the fact that it wasn't affecting just us, but you as well. I really am sorry." Sam looks into your eyes and you slightly lean back, averting your gaze.
"It must've been really stresstful for you the past few weeks." Taken aback by his words, you pull your chin away from his hand and turn around, wiping at your tears before resting your hand against your forehead.
"we're sorry, kid."
You shrug, still mistrusftul. Mistrustful but hopeful. Because Sam and Dean are different, fights and bad things might accure but no matter how disconnected from each other they might be, they always come back to each other. And you are no different. You know them well enough.
Your silence is apprehended as anger. "Okay..We understand, we'll leave."
But it's not anger and it's most certainly not hatred. So you envelop Sam again and bury your face in his chest.
Maybe that'll be enough for him to understand?
His surprise manifests through his still figure. "Thank you, honey." That surprise quickly dissipates and he hugs you back. "It..."
"it's going to be okay, honey. We'll make it okay."
------
I hope it isn't too cringe or too cliché because like-who would say sorry in under a minute. But yeah anyway much love sorry byyiii 🍁🍁🍁❤️❤️❤️
#sister!reader#sibling fic#sister x brothers#winchester sister#daughter x father#dean winchester x sister#dean winchester x sister!reader#adoptive father troop#daughter!reader#father figure fic#sam winchester x sister!reader#sam winchester x sister#sam winchester x sister reader#baby winchester#sister reader#sister fic#spn fics#protective brothers#overprotective brothers
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Shana, your tags on this post ...I need to know more! What exactly was the plan for Supernatural season 3 if it hasn't been for the writer's strike??? And how haven't I heard about this already?? I need the deets!
i'm so glad you asked :)
the original plan for season 3 was for sam to descend into using his demon powers to get dean out of the deal, and for dean to never go to hell. then the writers strike happened, the season got cut from 22 eps to 16, with only 4 after the strike, and that wasn't enough time to establish sam's spiral and powers, so changed the ending. it's on the wiki and there are some articles around about it
this was, in my opinion, the worst fucking decision they could make
it ruined the characters in a lot of ways and really unbalanced everything in a way the show never recovered from
the thing is that this arc is so well set up!
literally at the end of season 2 we get
"You're my big brother, there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. And I don't care, I'm going to get you out of this. I'm going to save your ass for a change."
sam has evaded azazel's every attempt to corrupt him. his shitty home life, all the demons he's exposed sam to, killing jessica, taking away his father, putting him in a literal life or death hunger games scenario. each time sam refuses to play ball
(sam's incorruptibility is what makes him qualified to be king of hell, but that's a different post)
he's the moral compass between him and dean. always has been. there is nothing in sam's messed up, twisted life that has pushed him pass mercy
but dean could do it. there's nothing sam wouldn't do for his big brother
john told dean that he had to either save sam or kill him. except he's never needed to save sam, because it's literally always sam making the measured, compassionate, merciful call. he's the one holding dean back, not the other way around
and sam straining towards darkness for the first time, for dean, would kill him. we'll come back to this
mystery spot, as an episode, is actually pointless if the plan was for dean to go to hell. because sam's sneak peek into what his life is like after dean doesn't do anything. i love this ep, but it's narratively pointless now
however
with the og plan, mystery spot is the turning point. it not only tells sam how miserable he'll be after dean is gone, but it also establishes what he's willing to do to get him back - pretty much anything. it's not theoretical pain, it's not theoretical grief. mystery spot is the thing that pushes sam towards being hard, away from the moral sweetness he's embodied for the past two and half seasons.
the next ep, jus in bello, shows this. sam is considering doing the terrible thing. he's now capable of considering the terrible thing in a way he wasn't before mystery spot. this is when his descent starts, when sam decides he's willing to trade his humanity for his brother's life
and then the writer's strike happened
right when it's getting good, right when sam's arc is ramping up, we lose it. and instead of picking it back up, pushing dean's deal to next season and giving it the weight it deserves, they say fuck it, and send dean to hell
but this fucks it all up. we have sam's "descent" with ruby and demon blood. except not really because he's not even hurting anyone. and dean's back, but not because of sam. sam didn't save him
this fucks it all up
because deans anger and fear and desire to save sam should have been tempered with the knowledge that he did that to save dean's life. that once more someone dean loves has made a terrible sacrifice for him, which he can't stand, which he hates. he has the self esteem of a gnat and the best people he knows keep destroying themselves for his benefit
i think the og build up was sam strengthening his powers to kill lilith, doing it, and then releasing lucifer at the end of s3. sam unwittingly starting the apocolypse to save his brother (does he regret it, dean wonders. it would be easier if he did)
and now everything is shit and dean's drowning but here and his brother has turned himself into something that's not unlike the kid dean loves so much it almost killed him, but not exactly the same. and now he understands john, because this is the sam that dean has to either save or kill, except he could never kill him. he loves him (and how can he kill sam for doing this when it's dean's fault, when dean made the deal that doomed his brother when all he wanted was to save him)
this is the flip that the show has been building towards. dean having to be the moral center for his brother for once. dean being the one saved. dean finally having to face his father's words and deciding once and for all if he's john's son or sam's brother
but instead dean goes to hell. and he's no one moral's center. because he broke in hell, he tortured people and he enjoyed it. they ruined dean with this. because instead of fighting and growing from his violence, they push him into it, and then they call him a righteous man. dean was the one harming people, he's the one that descended into darkness, not sam. sam and his demon blood had still only been trying to good, and in the end did do good, far more than anything dean did in hell, or has done since. his moral outrage, his anger, his disgust towards sam isn't only wildly out of character, it's hypocritical as hell. sam remains the moral, compassionate one, even through this. it never slides to dean. neither of them are really forced to grow or change, only to become twisted into each other in ways that hurt them both
this should have been the story of what sam would do to save his brother (anything) and what dean would do to save his brother (anything)
they should have saved each other
#instead we get dean as an abusive asshole and sam the perpetual victim from him from lucifer from everyone#in magicians julia has a line after her sa about how shes not a delicate flower or a fragile piece of glass that she's a person and ppl hea#they never let my boy heal#either of them#something something everyone is sam's family making deals that he has to pay for#supernatural#asks#flamingwell
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