#what's past is past but cmon man
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I feel like we as a society missed the opportunity to call Byler "Rainbow Ship"
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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im a child of divorce
#the bit is over when i say its over and even when its so joever for these two its not over for me!!! (once again i am on heavy copium)#anyway. thoughts behind the spoiler tags#gempearl#shiny duo#wild life smp#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#i feel like. i actually was expecting that#no but its so funny the one time the negative consequences of something does actually get acknowledged its the SL finale ‘betrayal’/j#like cmon fuck me i guess/j (BIG EMPHASIS. ON THE SLASH J. OKAY.)#but honestly though i did expect Gem to hold a grudge over the 2v1 in SL. and. its good that there are consequences???#it IS a ‘betrayal’ in Gem’s eyes. they were friends. they were murder besties for the last two sessions and then Pearl chose Scar over her#and its awesome man. [through gritted teeth] this is awesome man this will be good for character development ok ok ok. ok?#its also got something to do with Pearl having the red creep in. i think#because during SL Gem was like. nearly idolising the Scarlet Pearl persona while vaguely aware that her own reputation has a similar effect#and yknow. the horrors. the fact that their image is so heavily built on what others deem them to be and they can only play into it#but by the end of SL Gem gets ‘betrayed’ by this persona that she looked up to#and also her own ‘GeminiSlay’ intimidating image is also starting to fall apart. partly of her own will#and now shes watching Pearl slowly turn red again. and this time she knows its not good for her or Pearl#so shes distancing herself from it. shes ‘trying to fix her reputation’. she sees Pearl falling into it again and just. no. i dont love you#you betrayed me last season#but on Pearl’s end of things she’s already deep into the idea that as long as you say you ‘forgive’ someone then everything thats happened#in the past doesn’t matter and they can all be friends. and nooo absolutely no grudges will be held. no emotional repression here#so. because thats happened to her in her own team she thinks the same can happen with her and Gem#and thats so. im going to blow myself up now
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You ever get that feeling like you're f/o-ing characters by proxy? Like, you don't necessarily want to f/o them yourself, but you still want them to be f/os to someone and see other people self ship with them? Well, because I think I do ...
So I started rewatching Star Wars Rebels a few weeks ago and oh boy I think my dormant Star Wars hyperfixation is no longer dormant but instead coming back full force - AND NOW I WANT TO SEE THESE DORKS GETTING KISSES GODDAMMIT
These are just the first few that came to my mind but there's more (it's just that it's half past 5am and my brain is soup), but I'd love to see some self-inserts (or OCs) being shipped with them! And even if you don't like Imperials you could also just make them defect with/for you😌
In oder: Lieutenant Yogar Lyste, Commandant Cumberlayne Aresko, Minister Maketh Tua, Admiral Kassius Konstantine, Agent Alexsandr Kallus, Grand Admiral Thrawn
I wasn't quite sure about including Kallus (bottom left) and Thrawn (bottom right) in this list, because 1. they're not nearly as underrated as the others (although I haven't really seen them around in the self ship community), and 2. I also very much ship Kallus with Zeb (I'm rarely crazy about canon x canon pairings but those two are really cute), and well Thrawn is also on my own f/o list anyway xD (I usually don't mind sharing though)
Bonus: Admiral Yularen, however I prefer his look in The Clone Wars, but he makes an appearance in Rebels too!
(I really want to rewatch TCW as well once I'm finished with Rebels it's always been such a joy to watch when I was younger😭 I hope I can get my sister to watch it together with me like we used to)
#I'm not even sure why but I want those characters to be loved#I don't even particularly like all of them actually; like for example Konstantine is kind of a big idiot sometimes#but I want to see him being someone's cringefail husband#I AM considering f/o-ing Lyste though even though he's like the opposite of my usual f/o type😭 but I just find him so adorable#also I was surprised to find out that aresko actually seems to be slightly popular? like I found a few ppl on here swooning over him#when I saw that I was just 'yas go get yourself your man!!' many of the people who love him seem to be inactive nowadays tho :(#so mayyybe I'll have to jump in there as well xD I found some cute screenshot collections of him over the past days👉👈#I don't even know what this post is but I guess I'm making self ship advertisements or whatever#like cmon I can't f/o the Empire all by myself (or you know what maybe I can though👀)#self ship#self shipping community#self insert x canon#f/o suggestions#star wars rebels#lieutenant lyste#commandant aresko#minister tua#admiral konstantine#agent kallus#grand admiral thrawn#admiral yularen#selniasoriginal#selnia talks
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man i hope i get to feel creative joy again. im so demotivated in general
#like i drew some shit posts but i didn't finish them. i haven't finished anything in a while#i felt some passing joy when drawing but it went off so quickly#reflecting now i think this dejected overall mood is what made me think layton was both a tragedy and a joy#because i want him to be a joy. he is. but my mood made me fixate on the tragedy of his backstory#and what is more!!!#i have been watching a little spider make a spiderweb for a while now#and i felt jealous yknow#like look at her. she's going up and down up and down#doing her thing. working hard on her project and that's beautiful like. nature is happening#and yet i don't have the drive to draw nor write. this spider is my current only source of fascination#man im oversharing on main maaaannnn#cmon say something funny. uuuuhhhhhh bazinga#it's not so bad i know it's just low energy but it's hitting me tonight. this too shall pass#anyway layton is a joy. his past is a tragedy. spiders are scary sometimes but they're cool sometimes too#and one day ill draw again and ill go beast mode on the canvas and i will spill the blood of my enemies#and ill be proud of myself. but right now everything feels wrong so. not tonight#i have this habit of making the tags absolute nightmares while the post is like. tiny. like a spider!!!#thematic cohesion!!!!!!!!!!!
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tbh tho i think my art is fugly af LMFAO
#not in a '>w< eeeek! i wish i could drawww 🥺 i can only cobble such measle crap with my lowly peasant paws.. *unveils mona lisa*'#sense but like a my style makes me want to hurl whenever i look at it bcs it's a constant reminder that it can only be what i can make it be#and bcs it looks bad to me then that means i cant make things look good if u get my sense like#idk man 😭!! im just sick of being scribbly!! and not clean! i wanna ink my art! have crisp lines! dark lines!!#not have to put stupid darkening filters on everything bcs i cant color or shade so my art is just stuck with the blinding white background#well the frustration is more how i CAN color and shade.. i CAN ink my lines with a darker one#lets not excuse my laziness now cmon ted omg dumbass bitch#it's just that doing so makes me . crazy#my attention span like. crumbles when i try to add color or ink over lines bcs thats Such a commitment to me#i HATE leaving things unfinished when it seems so monumental#like unfinished sketches or prompts? fine. those are sketches. little prompts. even if u post it it's shit#but starting big things is a COMMITMENT.. with CONSEQUENCES ! ! i just want to avoid them ig#it's like im stuck between art being a fun lil past time and being a perfectionist actually so no. no it is not#but also i NEED to draw i NEED to write SOMETHING! SOMETHING!! then i realize the weight of things and purposefully hinder myself#then later hate myself for hindering even tho it felt so good and right in the beginning ORGHH or WHATEVER#idk one of my friends told me my style reminded them of the new tmnt movie (which has been praised yeah#for like beautiful ugliness tho) and like. i KNOW it's a compliment... but. why did it make me Feel 😭 like i wanted to rip my art 2 shreds#once i lined my art and my friend (an artist i admire) said smthin like 'omg finally! ted lined art! gorgeous!'#& i KNOW. I KNOW IT'S A COMPLIMENT. BUT WHY AM I THINKING LIKE. SO VIOLENT. NOT ABT THEM. BUT MY SHIT NOW#like UGHHH i just HATE feeling trapped and helpless when actually theres help available but im just DUM!! JUST LINE UR ART TED#art is like playing sport is like making good grades is like working well is like being a good friend is like being a good person#literally. just be GOOD.#it's all a performance to me ARGHARGH! I HATE THE JOKER! I HATE BEING CRINGE@! RAGGHH I HATE THIS SHIT#<- mfs when no basketball#mfw i cannot avoid enlightenment via the meaningless distractions i codepently craveRAGGHG!!!!!!1!
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wait a damn minute...
Peek-a-bangs trope.
The chef.
Book-smart / does their research.
Dedicated to save those most important to them.
Sad & lonely childhood (let me hug them please.)
Serious mommy issues.
#the promised neverland#tpn ray#ray#pokemon#arven#tpn memes#my edits#chido-comments#its no surprise i fell in love with arven so much. yeah the cutscene after the 2nd titan is what got me and i really enjoyed everything#about him/his story after but cmon man.. you had to be such a perfect ray clone huh? i honestly didnt even notice most of the similarities#at first while playing. it all hit me after all that area zero stuff with his past and sada. i was like 'aw he really hated her at first but#started to accept her and move on in the end. thats very ray of him' THEN i slowly realized everything else. like their cooking skills and#their long bangs which are so freakin obvious!! eventually i thought about the boys more and was like FUCK! i always fall for the same damn#characters somehow! aahh..i seriously love these boys y'all. theyre so precious to me. & say what you want about S&V but theyre great games
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my demons.
#aaaaaaaahfhhgg#whats that one post#if you think everyone hates you go to sleep oor whatever#yeah. yeah i should#really do that#stops me from making more stupid fucking posts on here and annoying everyone#heaby fucking sigh i thought we were past this man cmon#me.txt
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I think that comic creators should be forced to read the entirety of Ostrander & Yale's Suicide Squad run before they even THINK of using Amanda Waller in anything actually
#its like oh my god. read that book#i swear to god she is complex and has so much going on ans just like you NEED to read that book if you want the slightest CHANCE of doing#suicide squad justice#but then ofc ppl just care abt having a mean boss character they dont actually care about HER#i said comic creators bc its the writing and the art both#bc they dont do her character justice with the writing but then they also dont draw her anything like she looks like#like she is called 'the wall' for a reason guys she is NOT skinny as a twig like cmon#and shes not young either the woman is middle aged shes like 40s/50s#anyways. forcing ppl at gunpoint to read good suicide squad comics. instead of just slapping harley quinn on a team with some random#villains and calling it a day#also the suicide squad is supposed to be a MIX of heroes and villains!!! theres supposed to be varying moralities there! and waller isnt#evil guys istg- shes ambitious and kind of mean and p much ALWAYS stuck between a rock and a hard place but shes not evil!!!!#like cmon guys. its a book about heroes and villains on a team together doing off the books missions. its gonna have nuance esp in the#central kind of figure#godddddd ive been wanting to reread suicide squad SO bad these past 2 days#ever since plastique and waller showed up in nu52 jla im just like ahfiahdsuehdvdjc SUICIDE SQUAD#but i must stop myself. bc whenever i start reading multiple things at once THATS when shit hits the fan#and i go into a slump where i don't read comics for like 8 months and never finish the books im reading#so we're not going to do that but man am i tempted#maybe what i should do is watch the suicide squad movie. the james gunn one. maybe that would fix me actually#viola davis amanda waller goes sooooooo hard actually. casting choice of the century imo#and also they had rick flagg leading the team there which i respect. hes no ben turner but its something#especially since nu52 jla tried to turn steve trevor into a bargain bin rick flagg jr which was... certainly a choice#anyways <3333#also rip my stats this is a loss for feminism geoff johns just knocked kim yale out of my no 5 comic author spot on the tracker app 😔😔😔#im so sorry kim i didn’t mean to do you dirty like that ma'am#blah#suicide squad#dc comics#amanda waller
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( tempted to move blogs because TWO of my ship tags never saved and i'm annoyed as fuck. )
#ooc.#( the one i made today for kamui and namida )#( and the one for kamui and dez )#( cmon man what the hell tumblr )#( i don't wanna move blogs GROANSSSS )#( might have to if i don't wanna copy paste ship tags constantly )#( whatever not doing that today )
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man having grown up in an abusive household makes it so hard to tell when something is a normal disagreement a normal family would have and what is a fight that is absolutely something a normal healthy family would never ever have… like…. 😐
#it happened so fast too I can’t even process how it set off#context being my mom got really dizzy which happens because of her condition#and so we asked her to lay down#about 30 min later she’s back up again making sandwiches for my dad#we all start like calmly kinda teasingly being like cmon dad#she should be laying down why did you have her get up for that#and then my sister said something and then my dad got louder and she got louder and I was like why are we yelling#and so I had to get loud and it was just a whole mess#and my dad got really really fucking mad#and was being a total dick in my opinion#over like… nothing#and my mom sounded all scared and idk man it was a very weird interaction#and I was really shocked up about it because my brain just always goes back to when we used to get hit#but we’re adults now so I’m sure that won’t happen again but sometimes the way my dad gets pissed off#like it feels like it still could happen again one day ykno….#idk#I know so much is in the past#but it still feels like it happen again every so often and it’s very very very scary lol#anyways I can’t wait to leave <3 hahaha#but seriously like is that normal idk probably not I wish I had some sort of reference to what a healthy parent is supposed to be like#i don’t know a single person with a good relationship w their parents at least not both of them#it’s always just like one or none of them lmao#anyways#</3#abuse cw#also to make matters worse this all happened during our movie nights we’ve been having#to make my sisters boyfriend feel welcome in the family#since he moved in#like I can’t imagine moving into my partners house#and just hearing like constant screaming fighting matches randomly throughout the week like ok 😐😐😐
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I am still not over the level cap thing what do you mean level fucking 10
#rat rambles#like do they not realize how fucking pathetically low that is?#like it is So easy to get a follower to level 10 especially late game#like in every playthrough of this game Ive done I always have at least one follower whos past level 40 usually several#Im glad they didnt retroactively lower existing followers levels but it still sucks#it just makes leveling them feel kind of pointless when theyre likely going to passively max out after a certain point anyways#like genuinely I dont even understand what the point of this change is#because its not like getting broke. high level followers is much of a concern early game#and mid game is usually only a potential issue balance wise if youve been putting in a stupid amount of effort since the start#and by the time you get to the late game I. genuinely dont think it matters.#like in early late game again youll only have genuinely broken high levels if youve been going hard at leveling followers#and by the end of the late game its like ok and. let ppl be powerful cmon man.#like theres So many things they could have done to adjust the balancing that wasnt this#like if theyre concerned abt faith generation then make a cap on that or make it not a one to one level thing#if theyre concerned about demons then they could again adjust the scaling slightly or simply make it harder to level followers#they could have even used the deciple thing to help with that by having it be a prerequisite to higher levels#like maybe you could have a couple rings of inner circles with each tier unlocking another ten levels#and they could even add a lower cap at like 50 or smth just dont make it fucking 10#that might genuinely be the worst part of this update and Im not even joking when I say this just killed my motivation to play more#its one of the few things that you were able to keep working on and expanding after unlocking everything else#I genuinely really hope they change this because if not then I think Ill have to drop the game thats how bad it is to me
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Nagoshi is Such A Guy. He appointed Yokoyama to his positions literally just based on "vibes" alone. That's why a number of staff can be described as Characters in their own right.
He's also one of Mine's two dads, if you think about it, so I have to respect that (Mine's backstory and The Knife Scene were both written by him, and he very, very rarely messes with the scripts)
some would argue that hiring based off vibes alone is irresponsible, but i think when it comes to something like rgg that's the only way to go about it. it's like an after school club with qualified people except they're all to the left of being normal game developers
would jo even want to date a woman... questions i throw into the washing machine in my head.....
#snap chats#i respect any man responsible for The Knife Scene... nagoshi has a place in my heart.. what's going on in that dome of yours sir...#anyway im gonna be insane down here dont look. or do idk i wont control your peepers#not to worsen the AraSawa Is Minedai But With Dads allegation but do you think. arakawa ever asked jo bout his past..#'are you seeing someone' ass question and i KNOW arakawa would be SILLIER bout it..#if arakawa told jo about akane... bro i KNOW that was a topic of interest one day between them....#cmon jo... spill the beans.... how come you never go out to the clubs with the other arakawa family members...#where's that. where's that 'why does the office man stay after hours' post. you guys know the one#im not saying anything however. yokoyama you arent giving me enough jo material to psychoanalyze alright i gotta do a lil work here
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this video got me thinking….its kinda giving choso so walk with me real quick besties
˚ʚ♡ɞ
“fuckkkk,” the back of choso’s head knocked against the headboard, his chest heaving with a thin sheen of sweat covering it. the poor boy couldn’t form a single thought—the only thing swirling around in his empty mind is that he needed more.
his breath hitched when he felt your tongue wrap around his nipple once more, flicking the sensitive bud with your tongue. you didn’t bother saying much to him, it’d be pointless being the only word he could respond with was a breathy ‘fuck’.
“i’m ’bout to—hmph! nut again, it’s coming baby,” his head lolled onto his shoulder, his hips now bucking up to create a rhythm with your hand. you hummed around his nipple, squeezing his angry red tip, the clear pearls of precum leaking from his tip had you dying for a taste. “be louder…w’nna hear you cho,” you whispered in his ear, licking at the shell of it.
choso shuddered rather violently at the feeling, but nonetheless he got louder for you—a tad bit louder than you had expected. choso’s mouth dropped opened, a symphony of whiny moans following right after.
if he had any energy he’d fuck your fist himself, but alas after 3 consecutive orgasms all he could do was pathetically roll his hips. “so fuckin’ close, cmon baby make me cum,” choso nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt your soft hands begin to play his balls, squeezing them ever so softly.
choso’s entire body went limp as his orgasm hit, moan after pornographic moan spilling past his kiss bitten lips. the first shot of cum landed on his chest, some getting on his chin, which you greedily licked at a second later. his thighs shook in overstimulation, nearly closing because now it was really starting to become too much.
“baby baby baby wait—hah! you’re gonna f-fuckin’ kill me,” his larger hand wrapped weakly around your wrist, but it stopped nothing. you kissed you way up his chest to his neck, sloppily kissing, licking, and sucking any bit you could get. he just smelled so good—like vanilla and cinnamon, you just wanted to eat him up.
you brushed his hair out his face with your free hand. you looked into his tired, yet oh so lustful eyes, “you good?” you asked, halting your hand’s movements. choso sniffled and gave you a weak nod, “want you to drain me dry angel, even if i start crying.” it’s funny because just as choso finished his sentence a stray tear slipped from his eye, landing on his already messy abdomen.
choso stuck out his tongue making you giggle. you knew exactly what he wanted. you leant over, wasting no time shoving your tongue in his mouth, swallowing up his whiny moans. you resumed your hand’s movements, squealing when you felt choso’s teeth sink into your bottom lip.
he truly didn’t know if he had another orgasm in him but he didn’t care, even if he blacked out. why do you ask?? because soon he’ll be receiving the best aftercare known to man. cuddles, kisses, BACK SCRATCHES!!! he was as content as could be.
#ending kinda rushed but i had to get these thots out.#choso smut#choso kamo#choso kamo smut#jjk choso#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut
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ok to completely retread already well-walked paths but he/artstop/per was so boring to me i started hearing brutus
#granted. i only read up to like. 3.12#i wish everyone could just somehow look at me and know™️ that i only like vile weirdmedia. that recommending me or asking me#to enjoy 'soft romance' stories is the hardest thing to do.#I'll try!!! I'll fucking try!!!!! but i suck!!!! and i will have a bad time#anyways its a good comic for like. an intro to the concept of 'the lgbt' for like. tweens.#i can totally see it in a school cirriculum setting.#especially with how much time is spent asking 'what if ur only a little gay? what do u call that?' 'what do gay ppl look like?'#like cmon man.#i thought we were past this stage why are long-time gay ppl recommending me this. i know these terms you dont have to teach me#but i get it. some kids media is very comforting. i doing that too.#ppl looking at my beloved abstract media: this is bad bc there is no plot.#me looking at ppls beloved romance media: this is bad bc there is no plot#dummy posts#i dont understand the appeal and i think thats just my brainstructure
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Me watching the cop that came to let me into my locked car call for backup: 😐
#how many cops does it take to unlock a car#cmon man#i told him to go in through the top bc the seals broken already#he still did not#ive locked myself out of my car 3 times in the past 2 months#i know what im doing#i should have called someone else to do this
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