Tumgik
#what would it even be... i use beats for my talk tag....bc thats what hearts do...... art for my art tag.... bc it ryhmes....
sleepyblr-heart · 5 months
Text
at some point im gonna have to start tagging my coding posts with something and i dont think im ready for that.
0 notes
itsyagurlchip · 6 months
Text
٠ ˚ ※ ๋࣭ ᯓ⚝ ⋆ .˚✰Scent Fantasies ٠ ˚ ※ ๋࣭ ᯓ⚝ ⋆ .˚✰
✰⋆⁺warnings: fem reader (!) reader is a cat yokai(!) fluff(!) odd actions(!) if you can call it odd(!) cussing prolly(!) idk i wasn't keeping track!)
✰⋆ I just wanted to be gay for a min okay? (*chokes on raph ice cream thingy*) it's super short, but heartfelt. Btw if you want a better ref, reader is sorta like a golden retriever person; bc thats how i feel everytime i see april on screen. I hope you enjoy ❤️❤️
✰⋆⁺ You reminisce through the smells and sight of that damned thing. Luckily this is a normal thing and you definitely weren't embarrassed by the end of it.
You were searching through April's closet searching for one thing, and one thing only. It was sacred to you, no one knew what power it had over your emotions. This item could- Oh, there it is!
That oversized hoodie. The first one you ever created for her. The fabrics were expensive, the design was a bit cheesy, but April loved it all the same.
She didn't care about the amount of hearts you out on the breast pocket. She absolutely loved that black cat, sown into that forest-green background. She hadn't minded that you changed the boring white hoodie aglets to shiney neo chrome ones.
You carefully brushed your claws over it, minding to avoid creating holes in it.
And the whole thing just smells like the wash and perfume she uses. You snatched the poor thing from its hanger and stuffed it to your face. Using muscle memory, you walked towards her bed and plopped yourself right on top.
You could tell it was worn, by the dingyness at the ends of the sleeves, the pilling around the cuffs.
April, with her beautiful smile, would wear this for her sad days. Or even when she wasn't shy enough, she'd do so on public dates.
God- her smile. It just does something to you that you could never explain into better and enough words. Nothing could ever compare to how that girl made you felt. Your tail swished back and forth, sticking high in the air.
The way she talked, or the way she walked. How her lips quirk upwards at a horrible pun, or how her feet step to the beat of a song as she sits in a chair.
Whenever she talked to you, or when she pecked you to sleep. Where her hands were as you kissed, or when she held your face lovingly. You took another breath in and held the hoodie tighter.
You couldn't help but kick your feet, helplessly falling in love all over again. Your chest thrumbled out a pathetic giggle, your smile getting wider by the millisecond.
Hearing the door open, you slowly lift your head towards the person this whole thing was about! April chuckled at your doped out face, your wiggly smile, the occasional jiggle or kick your body would give.
"Hey baby girl, you okay? ha- you look dizzy" She smiled softly, looking down at you.
All you could do was nod, before promptly failing to keep your head up any longer. You hummed deeply, spoiled by the smell of the hoodie. April reached down to touch your head, helping you (somehow?) relax even more.
Not even a second later your were nuzzling your hand and purring like crazy. Suddenly, you pounced on her, taking her by hip, and nuzzling her chest. Your tail was curling around one of her arms.
April, despite being on her back, pulled you closer. She noticed how blissed out you seemed. The dilation of your pupils, the way you sighed so lovingly, how your fur seemed to relax even further with every brush of her hand.
ah.
"You got stuck in those scent fantasies, huh?" You nodded quickly, a mewl spilling out, looks like you rendered yourself non-verbal. "If you wanna cuddle just ask- okay?"
Its like weren't even hearing her, she could tell. It was always hard to snatch you from those clouds, but April never minded.
After all, she loved you just as much.
Tumblr media
(๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و tags: @kittykittyanon @radicallxser @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl @ziipzeepzop-eez @amorvincitomnia-14 @spongejuice. if you would like to be added, check my blog.
13 notes · View notes
her-canine-teeth · 6 months
Text
cornflower blue by flower face - notes
-interpretations r all mine and completely baseless as im prone to overinterpreting. but its my edit so idc (just a heads up. not like theres that much symbolism here either (yet))-
NOW WITH COLOURS!!
pov jackie is blue, pov shauna is red
I wanna lay on the kitchen floor with you
theyre. laying on the floor
I wanna do all the things that lovers do
idk but her lookkk in the beginning. to me, the neclace is symbolic of their support; a promise that theyll always have each other. something that held value to jackie (always held it when she was nervous/excited/idk) and now its shaunas. 'its a good luck charm' - im giving you my luck, im giving you what carried me through this; id give u anything. the meaning is like the one of a a ring to me. Also its a heart
Bruised on your face like a watercolour bloom
'bruised' reffering to the emotional bruises she shows now. 'watercolour' bc i think it fit sorta and 'bloom' bc. plant
Moonlight paints your skin
it does
Cornflower blue
honsetly just searched for blue stuff
You love me 'til you wear me out
yeah
Then you love me more
technically she doesnt. but jackie doesnt know that
I'm blue to the middle, just like you
=sad. shaunas sad bc she like. lost her friend
Freezing to the core
i thought that was funny. still do
The days, they fly like trains go by
the closest thing i found to a train
I'm on my way home to you
YES bc she is on the way home to her best friend, to her shauna (i think i alr said this in the tags) BCEAUSE the shauna in the death hallucination did never actually exist. Shes what jackie thinks she is, which is different from who she actually is. Jackie is on the way home; here, home simultainiously meaning 'shauna' and 'the place where hallucination-shauna came from' whcih is. non-existance. ignore the random man in the corner
And I think about if they ran me down
obvious i think?? even though theyre more running shauna down though
Baby, what would you do?
nothing
I wanna lay on the train tracks with you
can i just say. i LOVE the like transition of sound. idkkk anyways yeah theyre like together n happy
I wanna tie you down the way that lovers do
shes giving back the necklace that was hers, therefore binding them together (made more sense in my head ill be honest) maan idk how to explain but also it was the closetst thing to tying i could think of. also the eay jackie looks at shauna omg and i think her head idk shake? is sorta on beat. and its a HEART what more could u want
In the morning, I'll love the mangled bits of you
R U KIDDING THATS LITERALLY WHAT HAPPNED OMG cannibalism is a form of love.
I'll love you when your lips turn cornflower blue
makes sense also this was the first time i used a transition slay
I love you 'til I wear you out
yeag
Then I love you more
cannibalism is a form of love. this has been established.
Now all the things that we don't talk about
yeah
Are waiting at the door
guys look shes literally pointing to the door. amazing
I won't let you out of my sight
greatest tragedy is that she did
Even when you're sleeping
sleeping
So baby, take your medicine
think that is obvious too like. medicine
And promise me you're eating
yeassss
Who will I say goodnight to when you're gone?
love this part tbh
you can find the edit here!
0 notes
jungxk · 4 years
Text
just one (viii)
Tumblr media
summary: the only guy on campus who’s track record trumped that of your best friend’s - park jimin - was jeon jungkook. not that that was a problem…until he set his sights on you.
notes: first of all i wanna thank the people who supported me and encouraged me through one of the worst writers blocks of my life. all the messages and comments are the reason why i finally managed to post this. special thanks to @whippedforkook for helping me with the monstrous tagging process as well as giving me so much praise. and also @lonelyending for cheering me on for a literal YEAR bc thats how long i cried over this fic! this story is so special to me. we’re in the home stretch now x
warnings: mentions of illegal drug use and distribution, swearing, brief smut.
genre: drama, romance, humour, college!au
wordcount: 8k
tagging: @cutechim @benz-biarritz @gyukult @bangulin @eatersanonymous @alyssa1926 @skivv1es @a-sucker-for-them-sappy-shit @moonights @jeymuffins @juuneaux @catsukiii @andreaisaac @whatheydontunderstand @sreveles @noruls619 @henryharios @just-a-fuxked-up-kid @befriendswithj @btsbesharam @poemsandpunani @taelha @misosoup-forthesoul @jikooksmut @heart-eyedmf @the-piano-woman @angrysunshine @chaoticpaperfanhoagie @jsungshine @ci-yen @faby-montana @shinypeanutsportshero @jooniestrivia @alucards-s @cynamyngirl @jiminie-angel @myskoova @jkshoneybuns @smokintae @remmykinsff @majinbuwu @jangx2manboongx2 @potatodogs @seul-queen @alpharyth @blenxxxg @plsky @th-singularity @bapbaptothetop @hermiones-enchantment @stomachfilledwithbutterflies @euphorora @supachloe94 @jiminxjimout @ggukkieland @just-another-fic-recs-blog @jalexad​
part i // part ii // part iii // part iv // part v // part vi // part vii // part viii // part ix // part x
x
4 years ago
x
jimin hated yugyeom.
well, maybe hate was a strong word. he just didn't like talking to him, being around him, hearing his name or interacting with him on any level, social or otherwise. he really tried though, since he was one of jungkook's closest friends and still respectfully referred to him as hyung above all else. and if anything, jimin would always have a soft spot for jungkook, the kid he used to coddle when his own brother wasn't around. but having said that, there wasn't really much basis for not liking yugyeom. it was just a gut feeling jimin couldn't explain, a very subtle callousness about him only jimin could pick up on. for the most part he was just like very other mild mannered boy by day and party animal by night, but jimin still ducks when he sees him enter the library.
"fuck," he hisses under his breath, scooping up his laptop to stride behind a book shelf for good measure. because sometimes, contrary to popular belief, jimin wanted to be alone. he didn't want to make small talk or listen to someone tell him about how well they scored on their last paper or complain about their annoying girlfriend. sometimes jimin wanted to have no thoughts and listen to fleetwood mac as per his human rights. which is why he shoves into the first private study room he sees.
and not an empty one at that. there's a girl inside, sitting cross-legged in her chair at a desk with an array of dried up paint tubes and brushes surrounding open sketchbooks. you don't look annoyed or even that phased, just amused as you give him a once over before going back to painting. "on the run from solji?"
jimin blinks, back still pressed against the door. "huh?" he regards you properly. "i'm sorry, have we met before?"
"not really," you admit with a sheepish smile, which is when jimin suddenly realises that you're...attractive. "solji is in my stats class. you hooked up with her last week at some party and she told me about it."
"oh," jimin takes in your plethora of art supplies. "you don't look like a stem student."
there's a glimmer of something in your eyes, and though you hide it well jimin knows he's struck a nerve. "yeah, i get that a lot."
"it's not solji by the way," jimin clarifies. for some reason. "that i'm hiding from. just a bellend i don't have the energy for right now."
you smile. "it's fine. you don't owe me your life story."
"i do when i'm about to impose on your...study time," jimin peers through the window in the door, wincing when yugyeom enters the hallway. "what would it take for you to let me stay in here for a while?"
you pause for a second. "honestly? just be quiet and leave me alone. is that okay?"
jimin perks up, a weight leaving his chest. "perfect, actually."
x
x
x
[jungkook 11:42pm]: why does it say wings on it
[jungkook 11:42pm] where is it flying
[you: 11:43pm] ffs kook
[you: 11:44pm] im still on the toilet can u just hurry up
[you 11:44pm] grab some tampons too pls
[jungkook 11:46pm] fine what size pussy do u wear
[you 11:46pm] i hate u
[jungkook 11:53pm] ???? ? ? well? ????
[you 11:54pm] REGULAR 
jungkook giggles at his phone, already having left the women's sanitary aisle to grab some chocolate. months later and teasing you was still bundles of fun. he knew for a fact that you were sat there with that angry pout on your face, nose crinkled. he had never bought anything like this before, but jungkook had enough brain cells to know that chocolate was another necessity for that time of the month. after grabbing a large hazelnut bar, he pauses beside the oreos before grabbing a packet of those too. just for good measure. he strides to the self checkout - because even he wasn't man enough for the cashier yet - nearly dropping his array of sanitary products and confectionary when somebody calls out his name from behind the queue.
"kook!" the voice is unmistakably yugyeom's, confirmed by the hand that clamps jungkook over the shoulder and swivels him round before he could think about hiding his socially compromising shopping items. it takes a second for yugyeom to notice, doing a double take at the pads atop his small tower of goods. he holds back a laugh, balancing a bottle of gin in one hand while he waves back at some friends to continue. they were clearly making their pit stop before a night out, probably pre's if they still start as late as jungkook remembers. with his hair styled and expensive cologne lingering, jungkook almost forgets he probably looks unrecognisable in his sweats and cotton-fresh hoodie. friday nights weren't for cuddling. still, yugyeom's smile is welcoming and familiar. "got the munchies? and maybe also a uterus?"
"shut up," jungkook grumbles, averting his eyes. he shifts to his other foot uncomfortably. "my friend just needed a favour, that's all."
"uh huh," yugyeom gives him a teasing look. "is this friend the reason why i barely saw you at jin's the other week?"
jungkook blinks back at him. "wait, you were at that party? i had no idea!" a boyish smile breaks over his face. "why didn't you call me? i haven't seen you since-"
"minseok-hyung's new years eve party," yugyeom throws his head back with a laugh. "remember how we ended up on a boat after the ball dropped and-"
"spent all of new years day detained by the coast guard!" jungkook finishes with a mischievous cackle of his own, nearly dropping the tampons in the process. "fuck, that was so much fun! we need to meet up again, i haven't been out with the guys in so long."
"well no wonder," he quips a brow at jungkook's shopping again. "word got out you're a family man but i didn't believe it. until now, that is."
jungkook's smile falls. "what do you mean?"
yugyeom looks at him for a second, confused by jungkook's surprise. yugyeom was never quite as diplomatic as namjoon or yoongi, to put it lightly. and definitely nowhere near as accomodating as jimin. which is why his next words make jungkook's back stiffen. "bro, look at yourself. you got dairy milk in one hand and tampax in the other. on a friday night. the next time i see you i wouldn't be shocked if you had a baby buggy and a mortgage." still, yugyeom throws him an apologetic look. like a mouse caught in a trap. "face it, kook. you're old news."
"what? that's not true," his brows furrow unhappily. "i don't know what you're talking about. it's not like she's my..."
he can't say the word, but it hangs between them like a dead weight.
"yeah, right," the condescending look on yugyeom's face was starting to agitate him. "you totally blanked us at jin's after she showed up. not even just jin's..." he thinks twice about holding his tongue, but as always, decides against it. "i don't know you, jungkook. whoever this new jungkook is. it's been months. you used to hit us up and be independent and spontaneous and wild and now you're just...someone's boyfriend.
"stop fucking saying that," jungkook snaps, all visible signs of friendliness gone.
"why?" a beat. "do you even use a wrap with her anymore?"
jungkook splutters, heat rushing to his ears and hands in a stinging combination of anger and embarrassment. "how is that any of your business? the fuck are you asking me something like that, as if you-"
"thought so," yugyeom looks away from him with a sigh. if anything, yugyeom knew never to overstay his welcome but that clearly backfired tonight. "whatever, jungkook," he looks over his shoulder at him. "guess you're the last one to find out you're officially married."
"you're ridiculous," jungkook scoffs. "all this over condoms? grow up, yugyeom."
"only couples do it raw," yugyeom turns away from him, alcohol in tow as he waves a hand over his shoulder to join his friends like jungkook was nothing but a lost cause. "you would remember that if you still had game."
jungkook stands there, dumbfounded while the group of boys exit the store noisily but he can't hear a thing. the siren that had been itching the back of his mind all this time was suddenly there at full force, right between his eyes. the glaring truth that yugyeom might be right makes his knees buckle. all those rules jungkook once had, all those measures he kept in place to protect his liberty, to prevent this very occurence - where were they? what happened to them? as the sweet and accommodating counterpart to jimin, why had you never complied? though, the blame wasn't on your hands alone. he got complacent, comfortable. lenient. and now without even realising he was here, a scene from a romcom in the middle of the night, with nothing to say for himself but fuck. the realisations wouldn't stop racing, one after another on the conveyer belt of his anxiety.
the photos on his phone; mostly you. time spent, usually with you. the portfolio for his latest photography module also had some resemblance to your interests. charcoal pencils, night drives, orchids. like the ones you always drew on any scrap of paper lying around. now that he thinks about it, he's seen nothing but your orchids for months. and not just that - you wore his clothes sometimes too. his bathroom had your toothbrush, contraceptive pills and coconut shampoo. his closest friends, his hyungs...not one of them was devoid of affection for you. he wasn't even confident that if the choice was presented, they would still pick him over you.
by the time jungkook finishes paying and practically sprints to his truck in a daze, he can hardly keep himself from shaking. he palms the wheel compulsively, he could feel the sweat in his sideburns, hoodie suddenly suffocating him. it smelled of you.
and then, like a final curtain call: was he just your latest fixer-upper project? some good girl wet dream to play out in the wake of your emotionally traumatic past? a slap in the face to seokjin, maybe, and nothing more? when you were done, when he was out of your system, when you knew his taste by heart and had nothing new left to try - would you stay? did you even know how to?
did he?
jungkook starts the engine. he drives to your door, drops your bag of snacks and pads on the porch, and texts you before leaving. he does not go inside.
x
x
x
"you sure you'll be okay with just the boys?"
you scoff at seulgi when she pins you with a worrying look, taking some of her clothes out of her bag to re-fold them just so you had something to do with your hands. jisoo had already left for the long weekend with her family, so there was no one there to fill up the empty space between your awakward reply. you didn't know how to tell the girls that jungkook hadn't contacted you in nearly a month. and even though he was a notable flight risk from the beginning, you couldn't help but feel like there was hostility there. every now and again he'd at least send a nude or have a quick phone call when he was drunk or high at three in the morning, but you hadn't heard a peep from him. you couldn't stand the idea of someone you cared about harbouring comtempt for you, but the fear of reaching out and somehow making the situation worse outweighed it tenfold. 
you look up to see seulgi still staring at you with concern. "of course i'll be fine! they're boys, not piranhas."
"at least piranhas contribute our ecosystem. boys just cause problems for the hell of it," seulgi lays a hand on the crown of your head like a berating big sister, swivelling you to look at her in your fit of giggles. the urge to nestle you under blankets like a baby bird made her chest heave, and you could tell. "i'm serious. if jimin tries anything, call me immediately okay?"
"jimin?" you snort. "out of a room full of delinquents, my ex, and taehyung, you're worried about jimin of all people?"
seulgi wrinkles her nose. "god, when you say it like that its like i'm throwing you to the dogs." she pauses. "something's up with jimin. i don't know what it is, but he's...off."
you tilt your head innocently, remembering the brief interaction you had with hobi at seokjin's party. you had been so caught up in jungkook - or lack thereof - you hadn't thought to press him about it afterwards. in truth, jimin remained as...jimin as ever. if he was acting differently you certainly couldn't tell. "you think so?"
"mmm," she leans on the lip of the open suitcase thoughtfully. "but maybe with jungkook there, he'll behave himself."
you gulp, fiddling with his watch on your wrist anxiously. "maybe."
x
x
x
you nearly yelp when you feel a big hand swivel around your waist, bucking into the kitchen counter reflexively. jungkook always did this before rubbing his boner against your ass, but the light scent of citrus and short squeeze lets you know immediately that its taehyung. hoseok, jimin, namjoon and yoongi were still in the living room playing video games, giving taehyung the perfect opening to intercept you. namjoon and yoongi had insisted that you come over to their place after finding out you'd be alone for the weekend, and you had completely refused before taehyung's coaxing. and of course, jimin's persuasive nudging. even though you felt safe and relaxed here, it felt wrong to be in jungkook's friends' place without him. almost like a breaching of an unspoken boundary.
and clearly, taehyung picked up on your discomfort by the way he stared at you so softly. his back was to the sink, his sillhouette particularly long and lean this evening. "you need to lighten up, princess. you keep looking over your shoulder so much it's making me nervous!"
your visibly droop with a sigh. "i'm sorry tae. i've had a lot on my mind lately, and..."
he claps his hands on your shoulders, teeth peeking through his grin. "you're not doing anything illegal by being here without jungkook."
you wince at his name. "have you always been able to read my mind like this?"
"absolutely," taehyung's brown eyes look so rich up close. "you're allowed to have friends that are also his friends, because - and try to stick with me on this - relationships between people are allowed to be independant from the primary circles they met in. mind boggling concept, i know."
you wack him on the chest until he laughs. "stop making fun of my anxious thought processes! its called mental illness, sherlock! i can't help it!"
his nose scrunches cutely, enjoying your first fiery outburst of the day. "whatever. i call it not getting laid for a month and losing critical thinking abilities from it."
you gape at him indignantly while taehyung roars with laughter. "you're such a dickhead," you hiss through gritted teeth, yanking his hair and jabbing your fingers in his sides the way you would with jimin during a tickle fight. "whores have feelings too, taehyung! whores have feelings too!"
you both fall about with laughter, knocking over half the snacks on the counter in the process which only makes the pair of you laugh even more. it's such childish chaos trying to clean up the mess on the tiny kitchen floor that neither of you notice the front door open, or the gust of metaphorical and literal wind that follows. watching taehyung trying to salvage a bag of broken crisps is just so funny that the presence of an another voice in the living room goes unregistered, as do the footsteps leading up the hallway to the kitchen, so you have no time to brace yourself or properly pull yourself together with you see-
"...jungkook."
yours and taehyung's heads snap to the doorway. jungkook stands there with almost complete lack of emotion on his face to the pair of you kneeling in crumbs and napkins. there's a brief pause where the tension in your eye contact alone was so strong that it felt wrong to breathe. but it is shortlived. jungkook tiptoes over you like spilled milk, reaching for a glass of water. you and taehyung lock eyes while the tap runs in the awkward silence. "hey. you okay?"
"um," you're not sure whether to stand up, hug him, look at him, or even face him. "yeah! yeah, i'm fine."
he nods politely. "hyung?"
even taehyung looks visibly uncomfortable. "i'm good."
"cool. see you later," he says, downing the glass impressively fast before leaving the room just as fast as he entered it.
you and taehyung stare at each other again, not understanding why you both feel like kids caught eating cake before dinner. you could feel the sweat pricking at your back from the realisation. jungkook had no idea you'd be here, and given that interaction he'd probably want to leave now. there was always the inkling woven between his radio silence that he was done with you, but you never let yourself take it seriously out of logic. because how could months of passion and tenderness and honesty be undone so irrevocably like that? it didn't make sense. you hadn't changed. you were the same girl he hit on relentlessly and chased against all odds. so what was different now?
"____," taehyung calls your name gently, and it's only then you realise you're already up and trailing after jungkook into the living room. when you walk in he's already putting his shoes on to leave again, barely making eye contact with you while he chats absently to his hyungs so he can look busy. the four boys on the large sofa can only reply wearily, eyes darting between the pair of you like a firework was about to blow to soon. and it was.
you could feel it in your throat, under your breast bone, bubbling up your stomach. "wait, jungkook. um...h-how have you been? i haven't heard from you in-"
"i've been good," he keeps tying and re-tying his laces without looking up. "super busy. you know how it is."
his curtness makes you flinch. this same time last month jungkook used to kiss you senseless before he had both feet in the door. he'd ring the doorbell incessantly like a child and greet you with the biggest, toothiest grin you had ever seen. he'd make fun of your bed head and squeeze your cheeks until you'd snap at him. and now when he looked at you he hated every second of it. your mother had the same look. your eyes start to burn involuntarily. "yeah, i do. how is uni? your final project is due soon, right? what theme did you pick in the end?"
"the one i told you about," he stands up abruptly. "sorry, noona. something came up. i'll see you arou-"
"something came up?" you step closer to him. "something came up the second you saw my face? or did you really just trek all the way to your hyungs' place for a glass of water, jungkook?"
jungkook stiffens, but is determined not to lose face. and it's difficult to do under your big, accusatory eyes and jimin's death stare at his back. the whole room was waiting for his response, so he just shoves his hands in his pockets resolutely. "i needed to see yoongi hyung, but i can come another time."
you fold your arms. "well it's clearly important, and you're here now. so don't let me stop you."
"but you will stop me," jungkook snaps. "that's the problem."
"kook-ah," yoongi warns quietly, but he took one look at your face and knew the damage was done. jimin was already standing up, circling around the back of the sofa towards you. the red lights were all there; your watery eyes, your trembling hands. every breath you took looked difficult for you to complete and only jimin noticed.
"what are you talking about?" you squint. it takes you a second to understand; yoongi's guilty expression, jungkook's indifference. "oh, you're fucking kidding me." your resolve breaks for a second turning away only to glare back at jungkook with so much fire you can hardly stand it. "you're selling again? are you insane, jungkook?"
"see," jungkook's eyes are stony. "i knew you'd get this way."
"what other way am i supposed to get?" his lack of response only infuriates you more. it felt disrespectful. "jungkook, you're not a kid anymore. if you get caught with drugs the consequences are serious! forget the potential jail time, you could get kicked out of university, it would go on your record forever and-"
"stop talking to me like i'm a kid!"
"then stop acting like one!" you hate raising your voice, but it keeps climbing without your approval. "did you think about this for even five minutes? this isn't like just going to juvie like before and being done with it jungkook. your hyungs can't bail you out of everything."
"this is a lot of talk for someone who lapped up those fancy paints without a second thought," jungkook says darkly. his eyes aren't like you remember, his face solemn and near unrecognisable. "or did you think that getting that kind of money overnight is only something that's possible through daddy's credit card?"
dread blooms like a garden inside you. "that's...that's how you bought the paint set?"
"welcome to the real world," he quips. "as if selling overpriced weed to a bunch of pick-me-freshmans is considered a crime against humanity to anyone but you."
"you think that's why i'm yelling at you right now?" your voice was growing hoarse, desperate. "you think that's the problem i have with you being literal drug dealer, jungkook?"
he hates it. the sweltering silence, the judgmental eyes digging into his back, the slow realisation that the tears in your eyes were not at him but for him. jungkook's ears ring enough to make him sway on the spot if his feet weren't planted so firmly on the dingy carpet, this metaphorical ground. he couldn't shake the feeling that his lifestyle was only an issue now because of you, how he never felt a shred of guilt about any of this shit until he met you. and if there was anything that jungkook never responded well to, it was pity. and he could feel it from every person in the room, all people that that once cherished and coddled him until you came along. he swallows, throat dry from the way he couldn't look at you knowing what he was going to say next.
"you're embarrassing yourself, noona. you're not my girlfriend and you never were, so stop acting like it."
cotton. it's very faint, under the layers of conflicting cologne and beer and smoke, but jungkook still smelled of cotton while he spat acid. nobody could speak, even though jungkook never raised his voice let alone a hand to you, it still hit like a slap in the face. it sunk into the walls, your clothes, suddenly every hair on your body felt heavy with it. dirty. the shame came first, the humiliation next. and then the sorrow, the dread, and finally the defeat. you knew the stages well by now, and they were cycling through you like clockwork. how foolish you were, to make the same mistake again. nobody dared to move, everyone but jungkook staring at you in denial and horror. they couldn't believe their eyes when you nod steadily, bowing your head to the floor.
jimin is already slotting himself between you, his jaw tight. "that's enough, kook. just leave already."
"no," you stop him, unnervingly resigned. that single word cuts through all six men with ease. "he's right." you step around jimin, closing the space between you and jungkook. for a brief moment he wonders if you'll actually hit him, but somehow watching you unclasp his watch from your wrist and drop it on the coffee table in front of him is far worse. the sound seems to ring like church bells, definitive and umistakable. "you're right, i'm not your girlfriend. you win jungkook."
they all watch you leave in dismay, listen to the door closing softly behind you. within a second jimin sprints after you, calling your name, leaving everyone else dumbfounded. jungkook's stare could bore a hole into the abandoned watch on the table, still ticking away like nothing changed. like his eyes weren't burning, lightheaded at the realisation that he would never wear a watch again let alone the one he put on you.
x
x
x
to an outsider, you looked like you were coping well considering you just got dumped in front of all your friends. but jimin knew that face. your stony eyes, lips pulled thin as if to seal inside the collapse of a monument. you took the tea he offered, and then his arms, your face finding his chest with ease. muscle memory. his torso was a tad shorter than jungkook's, his heart closer to your mouth as if the steady thumps were asking for a kiss of acknowledgement. every time you close your eyes you could see jungkooks face, hard and unforgiving and nothing like the man you trusted all this time. but it wasn't a new expression; you parents looked at you similarly the last time you saw them. it was the look of someone who had no regrets cutting all ties. and now, jungkook was behind them in a lost list of people who chose to be strangers over loving you.
jimin sighs when you cry into his chest, brushing the back of your head gently. he had been ready for this for months, but he still hated to see you this way. again. it made his bones itch, his skin crawl uncomfortably every time you weeped. the only time he considered violence was when you were crying. but he knew what to do, laying down across the sofa so you could curl up into a ball next him, head on his bicep and face smushed into the crook of his shoulder. you used to cry like this for hours and hours, his arm familiar with the prickle of pins and needles. but it was the only place you felt safe. tucked into jimin's side is where you would always belong, and that truth was more glaringly obvious than ever now.
"lets get something to eat," he offers eventually, hand craddling the crown of your head like a child. jimin's other hand on your hip is warm and heavy when he pats you soothingly. in your episodes, you responded well to touch. "what about thai food?"
"not hungry," you grumble against him.
"we could make something together?" he peers down at your lack of response. "come on, babe. you gotta eat something. you didn't even have breakfast-"
"why am i so stupid?" you whisper, a fresh bout of tears welling up.
jimin rubs your thigh. "it's not your fault."
"yes it is. jungkook gave me plenty of red flags, and i ignored all of them-"
"oh, i meant you being stupid."
you scoff. "cheers."
"what?" jimin cocks a brow when you lift your head to look up at him. he wets his lips and you follow the swipe of his tongue thoughtlessly, distracted enough by his touch and proximity that you take a second to digest his words. "it's not like any of this exactly came as a surprise. you ignored me, remember? wanted to flex your big girl pants."
you pull away from him and sit up, forcibly shutting out the daze that jimin routinely puts you under. "what's wrong with you? can't you be polite and wait for a couple hours before laying into me like a normal person? jesus, jimin."
"so let me get this straight," jimin sits up, watching your back as you sit away from him. "you're mad because i'm not telling you what you want to hear?"
"no," you say, head shaking. "i'm not mad. i'm upset because i came here to be comforted by my friend and you're just making me feel worse."
"what do you want me to say, ____? that i had high hopes from the start?" jimin pushes his hair back, brows now at a sharp incline from frustration. "i told you starting something with jungkook was trouble but you didn't listen. why should i feed your victim complex when all i've done is try to help you?"
"victim complex?" you repeat, standing up slowly. the sudden steadiness of your voice causes jimin to panic.
"not like that. don't take it like that, it's just," he's suddenly before you, his warm hands palming up your arms warmly. "i didn't wanna see you get like this and it happened anyway, is all i'm saying." he sighs when your scowl doesn't let up. "if hobi hyung hadn't have given up so easy, then maybe…maybe this would never have happened. maybe if i had been harsher with him then you would have-"
"what are you talking about?" you ask quietly, searching jimin's face. "give up so easy? what's that supposed to mean?"
he looks away, hands slipping off you. "it's nothing."
"jimin."
he struggles to look at you, tongue in cheek. his lips purse for a moment, pink like roses. he's wearing that navy jumper you like. "look, it's not a big deal. he wasn't supposed to fuck you or anything, just take you out for a while. get your mind off kookie, show you a nice time."
your blood runs cold. "what?"
jimin's expression softens. "it's not as bad as it sounds-"
"really?" your voice is sharp, sharper than he's ever heard it. you recoil as if you had been struck for the second time today. "because it sounds like you asked some guy to keep me occupied like i'm a fucking dog. all because you can't stand the idea of me being within a meter of jungkook-"
he steps in, but you step back. "you know that's not true, _."
"don't i?" you scoff, covering your face in disbelief. "jimin, you've been hellbent against me even looking at the guy since day fucking one."
"because i didn't want you to get hurt!" jimin counters, eyes downcast. "i know, okay? i know how much of a dick it makes me sound, but its not like it hurt you when you had no idea! hoseok broke it off before you even knew about it so why-"
"because it's worse," you turn away from him. "you tried to control me. choose what's best for me because you think you know better than i do. sound familiar?"
his jaw sets, and it's like you can hear the twine snap in his head, the percussion of his heartbeat above yours even though he doesn't close the space between you. jimin stares at you for a long minute before drawing in a thin breath. "fine," he steps in, and you can't look away. "you want me to say it? fine. i'll say it."
suddenly the air is lace thin around you as you stare at him, waiting. jimin looks off somewhere else, somewhere you can't reach. "don't tell me you haven't thought about it, because i know you have. if i have you must have too. and lately its all i can think about - being with you, holding you, being the one who gets to touch you. and yeah, maybe it took having to see you with jungkook for me to realise how much i want all that, i put my hands up. but you have no idea what's it like to watch the person you love most get toyed around with by a time bomb like that. i've seen jungkook go through girls like underwear and i love him, god i love him, but even the idea of you being one of those wasted girls sitting outside a party crying over his sorry ass makes my fucking ears ring."
"j-jimin…" you whisper, but you have nothing to say. your hands shake.
"you deserve more than that, ____. you deserve more than waiting around for booty calls or living up to what the next guy wants. from jungkook, hoseok, anyone. you deserve someone's devotion and yeah, maybe all this time i've been too much of a pussy to give it. maybe all this time i was tiptoeing around my feelings for you because i knew if i admitted to myself that i loved you - if i admitted i was just like every other guy - i'd actually set the bar for something other than disappointment. id actually have to step up, and i didn't know if i could do it. i still don't. but if it has to be someone…it should be me."
suddenly he's holding your hands, calming the tremble that rattles them. his words bunch up together in your ears, the meaning lost amidst your awe. "jimin….jimin what are you saying? where is all this coming from, i don't...i don't understand wh-"
"i'm saying," he cups your face. "choose me." he pulls you in. so, so close. "choose me, not jungkook. not anyone else. me."
and there's a part of you that has already caved. that's already kissing him, melting into his arms like you've wanted to for so, so long. you're falling back onto the couch with him in a fit of giggles, curling back into his chest to hide your watery eyes, asking him why the fuck he took so long. you chat together between teasing kisses, pour your hearts out, maybe cry a little. later you would make tea and order pad thai and watch the office all night and fall asleep together in the living room well past dawn and then-
you close your eyes. "i can't."
"you can," jimin says, so passionately you shudder. his brown eyes are teaming with too much determination and ardour for his own good, and you both know it. its difficult to grapple with how huge a risk he's taking, because jimin never takes risks. it made the whole situation seem dire. "you know you can, ____. it's us. there's no one like us."
you don't know how you're not crying yet. you only have jimin to hold onto, hands balled in his shirt without knowing if you're about to push him away or pull him in forever. "maybe back then. maybe if you'd have said all this before," you feel empty, the beat of your pulse suddenly strong in your fingertips. "but it doesn't matter anymore."
he shakes his head in denial, his determination palpable. "of course it does-"
"i'm in love with him," you say. to jimin. to yourself. to the world, finally. "i'm in love with jungkook." holding jimin's stare isn't as difficult as you thought it'd be. "you know if you'd have done all this a few months ago…if you'd have just...i was always yours without question, jimin. and you knew it." it's his turn to bristle under the strain of your voice. "jungkook isn't perfect. i'll be the first one to admit that. he's made me cry, he fucks up, he makes mistakes. but he's never lied to me. he never made decisions for me. he never passed judgement on what i should or shouldn't do with my life. something that i never thought i wouldn't able to say about you, too."
there's a brief moment where everything stops. neither of you can believe what you just said. jimin watches you, frozen in his place as you take your bag, eyes glittering with tears when he calls for you. suddenly he's the time bomb he feared becoming, the panic in his eyes lighting them up like fire crackers. for the first time in his life, he stumbles over his words, and then his feet when you reach for the door, all composure lost. he was unravelling like a tapestry in front of you, never to be repaired, and he could feel it. "____. ____, please," jimin chokes, his cheeks blotchy. "i wanted to protect you, i was just trying to help. don't go. please don't go. i was trying to help you."
"no. you were trying to have me." you say, closing the door behind you.
x
x
x
you have no idea what time it is when you hear the bell ring incessantly.
it had been hours since you'd returned home from jimin's, but there was no way for you to keep track when your only priority was just keeping yourself afloat. you turned your phone off, drew the curtains, and resolved to alternate between sitting in seulgi and jisoo's rooms until they came back. you didn't know what else to do. when you weren't crying you were hyperventilating, and when that stopped the absence of emotion was so powerful you could barely keep your eyes open. you were exhausted but could not sleep. starving but could not eat. it was a miracle you even made it down the stairs, using what little strength you had to yank it open without even thinking about who could be on the other side in the middle of the fucking night. but at this point, you would gladly take a serial killer over jimin or jungkook.
"taehyung," you breathe when you take in his face, relieved. you must look like absolute shit because he scans your face and winces. 
"jimin told me," he says, the apology in his voice and expression was almost painful to register. "he told me everything. ____, i'm so sorry. i should have told you about the hoseok thing, i just thought it would be worse coming from me, and then i tried to force jimin into confessing but then he didn't because he's jimin, and now-"
"you're only allowed to come inside if you stop apologising," you say weakly, voice haggered from the hours of crying.
taehyung's pouty expression almost makes you smile with how cute he looks, gingerly stepping over the threshhold. "i really am sorry though."
"for what," you say monotonously, closing the door behind him while he takes off his shoes. "my inexplicably terrible taste in men? my uncanny ability to get manipulated by literally anyone who shows me a scrap of affection? or my absolutey shredded-to-shit attachment style thats barely intact let alone functioning healthily? after hoppping between the first two for a few hours i'd personally go for the latter. but whatever."
"please shut up," taehyung sighs, bringing you into his arms before you could have a second thought about it. "you need to amp up the misandry in this context. a lot of this had nothing to do with you and everything to do jimin and jungkook."
you're too tired to open your eyes, snuggling into the softness of taehyung's chest. you’re too exhausted to argue. "where did you learn the word misandry? have you been reading?"
"yeah," you can hear his big, pleased grin. "i know you and the girls have been calling me a himbo behind my back."
"affectionately," you add, peering up at him. he wipes the wetness off your cheeks, moving upstairs to your room with your hand in his. he fetches you a glass of water before putting you into bed like he's paid to do it. taehyung was the cuddliest person you had ever met, but you had rarely seen him dote on anyone. "girls love himbos. it's a compliment."
"not all girls," he mutters when he returns from the bathroom with a glass of water. "drink this, would you? you look so dry it's making me itchy."
you do as he says with a roll of your eyes. "what do you mean?" you finish your water with a big gulp. "jisoo loves dumb guys, what are you talking about?"
taehyung looks away from you, bottom lip rolling up under his teeth so fast you barely catch it. he pulls up your desk chair next to your bed, thinking long and hard before meeting your eyes again. "i don't mean jisoo."
you don't understand at first, but after staring at his face for a long minute your stomach drops. "don't. don't you fucking dare," another beat of silence. you rip the covers off you to scamble to your knees, grab your pillow and hurl it at taehyung's head. "taehyung, please don't tell me that the one remaining, healthy relationship i have with a man has also been shot to shit because i swear to god i'm gonna-"
"it's not a big deal," he says firmly, and he really does mean it. taehyung catches your wrists when you lunge at him, effectively ending your outburst before it can begin. he keeps hold of them while he stares into your eyes, watching the way they fill up with a fresh bout of tears. "i've had a crush on you for a while, so what? it's not anyone's business but mine so don't worry about it."
you try not to scream at him. "how long?"
"...since the start." he shrugs. "it's not like i could have done anything anyway. with jimin around. he’d never have it."
"but...! but..." you splutter, the highlight reel of your friendship suddenly marred before your eyes. "but you let me talk to you about boys! you gave me advice with hobi and jimin and jungkook and...! you encouraged jimin to confess to me. and the whole thing with jisoo?"
he wets his lips guiltily. "jisoo is a nice girl. i like her, but...not like you. i've always liked you."
you shake your head in horror, your face crumpling. bile rose in your throat. "so all of that...playing with my friend like that. was just to get to me?"
"listen to me," taehyung says firmly, gripping your wrists to make you look at him again. he's so close you can feel the warmth of his breath on yours, and you never realised how large taehyung's torso was compared to yours before. he could have smothered you, but he didn't. in all senses. "the way jimin and jungkook handled their feelings is on them, just like how this is on me. it doesn't matter if i'm fucking you or not, you're my friend and i'll always want people to do right by you. and that includes me."
there was nothing else to say, so taehyung wordlessly wipes your face again and fetches you more water before retreating to sleep on the couch downstairs. all the while you sat there in your bed, confused and bewildered and thoughtful. the same bed jungkook fucked you on. the same bed jimin held you in. out of all the men in your life, taehyung was the only one who treated his feelings for you with reverence. there wasn't one interaction you could think of where he made his feelings clear, where he even hinted towards wanting something more. if he hadn't have said anything tonight, in the wake of one of the most emotionally tumultuous days of your life, you would still be in the dark about it all. and that was the scariest part. you didn't know anyone else who hadn't let their feelings for you effect how they treated you. so ultimately, it was possible.
and jimin and jungkook chose not to do that. but taehyung did.
taehyung did.
when you finally pad downstairs after hours of ruminating, jisoo's bedroom door is wide open. and that's who you should be thinking about now - your friend and sister jisoo - as the sky begins to lighten with the signs of morning. you hadn't slept for over twenty four hours, you were hungry and thirsty, delirious from the whirlwind of losing the two most important men in your life in one day. but still, you are drawn to taehyung. taehyung, who never asked anything of you. taehyung, who was as silent as he was selfless this whole time. taehyung who routinely put what he wanted aside in favour of what was best for you. taehyung, who protected you without needing credit or recognition for it. taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung-
"taehyung," you whisper scraping your nails through his hair. his eyes fluttered open, twisting his head to face you as you hovered above him. he could barely see you in the darkness. "taehyung, wake up."
"what is it?" he croaks, sitting up with half-lidded eyes and a yawn. he doesn't know how to read the expression on your face. he swings his legs off the sofa in a sitting position, wearing nothing but his boxers and tee, visibly alarmed. "what happened? are you okay?"
you take his face in your hands and kiss him. 
taehyung stiffens against you, breath drawn thin. you pull away to gauge his expression, desperately searching his eyes in the darkness. for discomfort, disapproval, anything negative at all. the absolute ardour you find instead could knock you down if taehyung didn't reach for your neck, kissing you again. you whine at the feel of his tongue, having no idea where such sudden and intense arousal was coming from. when you pull away with shaky limbs, you climb onto his thick thighs so he can feel your wetness through his boxers. taehyung grunts at the sensation, and again when you kiss him passionately and without abandon. the sweet girl every guy he knew was agonising over, suddenly in his lap. he's barely had his tongue down your throat for ten minutes and you're already rocking into him, his erection betraying his resolve.
it's better than he dreamed. 
"taehyung," you gasp, palming him now. he groans when he pulls away to look at your mouth, glistening with his saliva when you take his hand and guide it down to your arousal. "please."
619 notes · View notes
tobi-momo · 4 years
Text
Cuddling With Them While They Game PT 2
Tumblr media
a/n: kasjsdhakdjs pls- when i got this req i sqealed srsly i love it ty for this :p
Type: Headcanons
Genre: Fluff, crack???
Warnings: none :)
i made a part one with bakugou, kirishima, and todoroki!
Tumblr media
he doesnt usually play games but when he does he tries his best and its so cute🥺
feel like he has game rage, but its like him trying to smile through the pain and act like he isnt mad💀
HE PLAYS CONSOLE KASKDJSAKD BUT NOT LIKE THE BEANBAG LIKE KIRI ITS CONSOLE WHERE HES ON THE FLOOR RIGHT UP CLOSE TO HIS TV SITTING AT THE FOOT OF HIS BED
KASSDSKHGDAK THATS SO CUTE PLS-
so imagine: you walking in his dorm room, expecting him to be studying or working on his technique, but instead you find him on the floor in front of his bed, a blanket covering his head as he presses the buttons ruthelessly while he whispers little curses at himself starting to get mad
you closing the door got his attention, so he invited you to sit next to him, so you do
at first it was a little awkward bc he wasnt sharing the blanket (you cant convince me he isnt a blanket hog you cant) and his eyes were glued to the tv screen like he forgot you were there
you started to get tired, your head drooping on his shoulder- his body goes absolutely stiff- like- midoryia.exe has stopped working youre gonna have to wait for him to windows 8 reboot
once he finally looks at you and youre like this close to falling asleep he turns your body away rq to move the blanket off his shoulder so your head can rest on his actual shoulder and the blanket is around you too
he usually doesnt have his mic on at all, and if it is he usually doesnt talk unless hes going along w a joke? iykwim?
i feel like he plays games like call of duty and halo (he loves animal crossing and sucks at among us) but he doesnt like when he sees them actually die? like the gore and stuff? idk he just gives those vibes yk? i feel like hed feel really bad kaskjdshad hed get over it tho
i cant really see him play minecraft, tho, i mean unless youre playing w him, i dont think he would play it by himself unless he was like building a fucking castle for you or sum-
but ya you start to go to his room more when he games to hang out and every. single. time. you. fall. asleep. he isnt complaining tho he loves your sleeping face :p
when you sleep on him he usually wrapss an arm around you and when he can presses little butterfly kisses on the top of your head and takes his hand to rub your arm up and down oml kdajsd pls-
Tumblr media
he plays both computer and console i just think he plays he console a bit more?
ok this is a lil soft and maybe a bit ooc but i like if you were to come in while hes playing games you would sit down between his legs, your back to his chest while he plays
he would either rest his head on whatever is behind him or he would rest it on your shoulder (if youre more on the taller side)
and okokok i feel like if you were curious ab how the game works he would def let you play for him for a sec, he would guide yu on what the buttons do and what your tasks are yk? (again w the soft shi im sorry kasjhsdfjf *cri*)
he would keep an arm around your waist while letting you play or he would rub your thigh (maybe both kasdjshd) while he watches you play
if you get a lil frustrated he would totally tease you ab it then tell you how to do it right oml
if you get tired he would take the controller from you and let you sit back on him chest, resting on him while he games
he might turn the volume down a lil, but i also think he doesnt care that much LMFAO
i feel like he would rub your side a lil its almost tickly but hes a lil more firm than that yk?
he would keep his curses at a minimum although he doesnt have that much game rage at all bc again, he doesnt care, but ppl are stupid so he might get frustrated sometimes
once you fall asleep and hes been playing for a while he might just leave the game hes in and carry you to bed and get in with you
i dont think hes much of a cuddler at all but a little bit of contact is ok w him
but then you start to shift and scoot towards him in your sleep
until you are either completely ontop of him or your head is in the crook of his neck and hes just sitting there like 😐😤😒
but he warms up to it bc he wuvs you (read: hes fucking whipped)
ao he lazily puts an arm around you and bears it for a couple more hours
but when yall wake up he finds himself literally clinging to you KASDJHSALKDJ
Tumblr media
he. plays. computer. end of conversation
he got the wasd game iykwim😩 (ill shut the door on my way out)
he absolutely loves it when you come to sit on his lap while he just- he loves it sm
he plays all types of games (except overwatch. you will not catch this man playing overwatch pls-)
i feel like you wouldnt run into him playing games he would always play them once youre with him in the room
he wants you to be w him while he games, he wants you to watch him or just be there
youd be laying on his bed, hust doing whatever, scrolling on your phone while you hear him set up
you love to cuddle him- i just KNOW hes amazing at it
so when you hear him clicking away and see him sit down you stand up and walk to him
he doesnt even have t look at you before he opens himself up to you to sit on his lap
you watch him play (and his hands kasjlsdh) and sometimes you ask him questions ab it- hed be happy to walk you through it and explain
if you wanna play he'll let you play, teaching you everything ab the character and shit
he is the most patient person on earth i KNOW
he doesnt get game rage
he is literally so stoic- so calm i swear
he doesnt use his mic like at all
HE LOVES PLAYING WITH YOU
teasing to the max th- its cute tho he isnt being a meanie
loves playing among us and animal crossing (he def plays)
yall usually go to your island bc he likes it more kasdslahd
and when hes the imposter? hes like fucking corpse i swear
if youre sleep he's literally a perfect pillow, plus the sound of him breathing while he rubs your back is-
momo.exe has stopped working
Tumblr media
HE PLAYS BOTH COMPUTER AND CONSOLE EQUALLY
he uses the mic constantly and is kinda loud- but you dont hate it
he laughs a lot, and gets some game rage but its pretty controlle, he just gets butthurt sometimes :/
when you walk into his room he is getting so into it like he doesnt even notice even notice you come in
he only notices your presence when when you put your hand on his shoulder- he literally jumps
when he plays console he's on his bed, just laying there chillin so when you walk in and say hi he is sooo happy youre there w him omg
he just loves you presence
i imagine you climbing into bed w him and he continues to play his game although he loves it when you touch him (not to sound sexual at all he genuienly loves your touch)
and you up to his side- he wraps an arm around you, telling you how he missed you how mych he loves you (ksadksjhaksd)
when you fall asleep he turns the volume down and probably tones down his voice, although sometimes he jolts bc of some kind of mess up
but he manages to keep you asleep on him until he gets tired too- turning everything off and just wrapping you in arms (he'd prolly end up on your chest ngl)
on the computer when he plays you hesitate o cuddle ONLY bc od how much he moves, like you arent gonna be there comfortable for a while but eventually he calms down
he just gets nervous- his heart starts to beat rapidly and his leg bounces (same kaskh) espECIALLY when you straddle him oml he BREAKS
but he eventually calms down so its more comfy
when you fall asleep he will constantly press kisses on your head omggg
so soft kasdjhksajf pls-
i feel like he plays longer when hes on the computer so he would prlly still be on there when you wake up- looking absolutely dead insode aksjdshadl but you convince him to go to bed, bribing him with a 'i'll go too'
hes literally whipped for you :)
~.~.~.~
hope yall enjoyed a part 2-
taglist: @combat-wombatus @toosharkinternet @alpha3113 @flattykawadoorusmilkbread @zerohawks @hitosushi @katsuhera (sry my tags are being weird)
282 notes · View notes
lovesanmotion · 3 years
Text
Light - Jeong Yunho
summary: cool uncle by day but mafia boss at night, jeong yunho is ready for anything; except for falling in love.
tags: @couchpotatoaniki (yes i am tagging you bcs you blossomed this idea to me hihi)
A deep sigh left Yunho's lips, lighting up his cigarette and sticking it between his lips before releasing pearly white smoke. His once neat suit was now covered in sweat, dust and a trickle of blood from earlier events, singlehandedly killing a mafia group from the neighboring city. He lifted his wrist watch and checked the time - 10:01pm. Sandwiched between his middle and index finger, Yunho raises his cigearette stick onto his lips and puffed out a smoke.
His once cool composure broke when around the corner, the slim but curvy figure of his neighbor - y/n y/l/n came into view. She had her head hung low, shoulders drooping down and walking gloomily home. But Yunho stared at her. Around y/n, he felt like a high school boy who has a crush on her. He didn't also missed the fact that it was too late for y/n to go home. Work hours ends at 5-6pm, but 10? Yunho wondered if you took an overtime.
As y/n passed him by, he couldn't help but smile to himself. Feeling his face heating up. Getting up from the bench, he dropped his stick and stepped on it before following you home. With his hands tucked inside his pockets, Yunho wondered why you ever chose to live in a dangerous city like this. Was it because the rent's cheaper? Or to live close to your office?
He stopped his tracks and hid behind a pole, watching you get inside your home building safely. Watching you get home safely is what Yunho's been doing ever since you moved into the area and with a smile on his face, Yunho walks back home.
As the sun sets into the blue sky, Yunho packs up a lot of candies in his pocket before leaving his home and strolling to the neighborhood park. Clad in a bright red and white striped shirt and pants a bright smile on his face, Yunho would never be mistaken as someone who killed a group of guys last night. The cool breeze swept past him, causing his bangs to fly away.
As he found the children playing merrily and happily in the park, his heart swelled with an overwhelming feeling. How he wished these children would grow up into kind and humble adults. When the children saw him coming up to them, a chorus of "uncle Yunho!" greeted him, followed by all of them running up to him for a hug, some even hugging his legs.
Sitting down on the wooden bench, he gave each child a piece of candy and chocolate. Their little smiles upon tasting the fruity and sweet treats brought a smile on his lips too. However, Yunho mentally did a head count on the children.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. One was missing, and the one missing happened to be his favorite. He was about to open his mouth and ask them where y/s/n when a small but cheerful "uncle Yunho!" greeted him from behind. Turning around, his eye's widened.
His neighborhood crush, holding an ice cream cone with one hand and the other holding hands with his favorite child from the playground.
"Mommy this is uncle Yunho! He's the one who always watches us and gives us candy when we play here!" A deep shade of red plastered on Yunho's cheeks. Slowly he turned away and sunk a bit lower on his seat, feeling himself getting shy. But he was a little surprised to know that y/n has a son.
Yunho watched as y/s/n joined the other kids in the slide and on his left side became occupied by you.
"Doesn't it get a little sad when you watch them slowly grow up? One day they are only crying for attention and the next thing you know you walk with them to preschool." Y/N spoke, taking a lick on the vanilla cone.
"Do you have kids at home?" Yunho shook his head. But he would very much like to have one with y/n.
"I'm y/n by the way!" He looked at the hand extended out for him to shake before looking at your smile. Yunho's heart beated loudly inside his chest, not missing the sight of the ice cream on the corner of your lip. He slowly leaned in and raised his hand, wiping the cream away with his thumb.
"Nice to meet you, y/n. I'm Yunho." He smiled at you, seeing that pink tint across your cheeks. Yunho thanked the gods that this might be the chance for him to properly talk to y/n. He turned to his side and striked up a conversation with you, slightly getting distracted with the way how you lick your ice cream.
"Uh..hello? Earth to Yunho?" Yunho snapped out of his trance and shook his head, batting his eyelashes. Yunho stared at you. "What was that again?"
"I was asking you earlier if you wanted to have lunch with me and y/s/n. Think of it as a thank you for watching over my son." Turning his head, he saw the children leave one by one until it was your son left sitting in the swing.
"I-I would love to!" He blurted out, maybe a little too loud. Yunho suddenly backed away, suddenly feeling shy but he only found y/n chuckling at him.
"That was cute. Anyways, let's me show you where I live." As Y/N got up, so did he. He took the pleasure of carrying y/s/n in his arms as he followed you to your place, he had to pretend he didn't know where you lived. How was he going to explain that he has been following you for months already?
"Welcome to our place!" Spoke Y/N in a cheerful tone. The place didn't look half bad. As he sets y/s/n down and removes his shoes by the doorway, he took in the appearance of your place. It isn't big nor small, perfect for two people living, light wooden floors, cream colored walls, yellow and green cupboards and a mini bookshelf thats occupied by books about numbers, letters, alphabets and story books.
"This is a nice place you've got" Yunho says, sitting down on the couch only to be sunk lower as he didn't noticed how the couch was small.
"I guess I was lucky to find this one. More greenery in the province than just seeing buildings in the city." Y/N spoke, Yunho watched her enter the kitchen. He got up and excitedly followed her like a high school boy following his crush around school.
"What are you going to make there?" He asks as he stood behind Y/N making her jump a little. Yunho didn't realized how close he has gotten to her, but he felt like his heart would burst at how small she is close to him.
"Does pasta sound nice?" Y/N tilted her head to the side. If only his mornings were spent this close to y/n, Yunho would be in heaven already.
As Yunho was about to say something, in came little y/s/n holding his school bag.
"Mommy, can you help me with my homework?"
Two heads snapped to look at y/s/n who stood by the doorway of the kitchen.
"Your mom would love to!" Yunho smiled at y/s/n, held y/n by her shoulders and pushed her out of the kitchen despite her many protests against it. Yunho opened the fridge to check what ingredients were available, he grabbed whatever he needed and placed them on the counter and started cooking.
It was only like last night, he was using the very same knife to slice throats and now he's slicing meat with the same knife. But Yunho was only occupied by the merry thought of cooking for his crush.
After half an hour passed, Yunho beautifully plated three pasta bowls on the table. He gave himself a pat in the back for doing an excellent job and was about to call y/n and y/s/n to eat when he heard some talking.
"Mommy do you like uncle Yunho?" A small voice, y/s/n, as Yunho thought. His heart raced upon hearing this kind of conversation. There was a moment of silence, Yunho was fidgeting to know your answer.
"Mommy can uncle Yunho be my dad?" Yunho clutched his chest dramatically, pretending to wipe a tear from his eye. But there it was again, that silence.
"Let's see, y/s/n. Want to see uncle Yunho if he's done?"
Yunho started to get up from his spot but hit his knee in the process, an inaudible sound came out of his mouth and suddenly the door swung open. Y/N and Y/S/N stared at him with a blank yet confused looks on their faces.
"Uh..lunch is ready!" Yunho smiled and instantly stood up from the ground. As he lead them to the kitchen, he was proud to see their expressions and sat down, paying attention to y/n's reaction before eating.
"So what do you do, Yunho?" Y/N asked while twirling pasta with her fork.
Yunho racked up his brain to think of what should he say. But he choked up in between.
"I'm unemployed at the moment" He says. There was no way he is ever going to tell that he kills people, raids warehouses and factories and regulates drug deals within in and out of the country. "What about you? What do you do for a living?" Yunho gulped the food down his throat before facing you.
"I, uh...I just work at, at a very boring corporate office. They don't pay much."
"Is that why you do overtime and get home late at night?"
"What?"
"What?"
Yunho stared at y/n wide eyed. That was wrong of him suddenly mentioning it to you. He shook his head and carried on the conversation by changing the topic.
For the whole afternoon, Yunho stayed with Y/N and Y/S/N, watching kids movies while having a snack. Y/S/N falling asleep in the middle of the movie. Yunho took the pleasure of letting y/s/n sleep on his chest, he could get used to being a househusband. With the sun setting, Yunho thought it was best for him to go home. But was stopped by y/n to join them for dinner. On the outside, Yunho thanked you. But on the inside, Yunho was giggling.
He cooked once more in the kitchen, clogging out y/n's protests. Dinner became a happy meal as all three of them became full. While y/n was cleaning up in the kitchen, Yunho asked permission if he could take y/s/n out for a walk, promising he'd be home by 8pm.
Yunho took y/s/n to the convenient store, handing him a whole bar of chocolate in his small hands. But the little boy stared at him.
"But mommy says I can't have too much sweets" the small boy pouted.
"But your mom isn't here right? This'll be our little secret. You and me." Yunho grinned at the small boy who flashed a toothy smile in front of him.
"Uncle Yunho do you like my mommy?"
"Very much." Yunho suddenly stopped as he looked back at the child with him, now grinning at him.
"Okay, that's another secret between us. Don't tell your mommy about that too okay?" The small boy nodded his head quickly, Yunho held his hand and walked back home with him. Unaware of two eyes following them as they head back.
Tumblr media
(gif is not mine! credits to the rightful owner!)
149 notes · View notes
hwangsies · 4 years
Text
LIMERENCE
Tumblr media
(n) the state of becoming infatuated with another person
Tumblr media
pairing: hyunjin x female reader
summary: you haven’t spoken a word to hyunjin since he ghosted you after a fun new years eve together, so what’s the worst that could happen when fate (or chaeryong,...well, same thing) pairs you up for a road trip across the country?
warnings: e2l (ish), university student!au, non idol!au ,a lot of swearing. alcohol consumption,long flashback, mentions of infidelity, hyunjin is a giggly sweetheart, smut as in: dom!hyunjin, unprotected sex (wrap it up luvs),fingering, oral (f recieving), slight choking, praise kink, hand & strenght kink (manhandleing oopsie), slight overstimulation, hyunjin is really enthusiastic about consent (as you should be, periodt), reader is nervous and scared of hyunjins big pickle (ew i hate myself), motel sex (but it’s not trashy i promise!)
8.6 k words ,meaning grab a snack and a drink,
and enjoy!<3
---
"alright everyone" your professor rubs his hands together "that was it for today... i hope you all have a great break and i'm very exited to see all of you again next semester. hopefully in person again" he chuckles.
You and your classmates exchange goodbyes with him before one after the other exits the zoom call.
"fuck" you sigh after closing your laptop and lean back on your bed.
"you did it girl" your dormmate chaeryong claps, at which you giggle before shifting your eyes to her on the other side of the room.
She's sitting on her bed, folding her clothes before putting it in her suitcase thats placed in front of her.
"finally" you sit up and watch her roll up a pair of socks.
"my last class was yesterday and mrs kim teared up" she giggles "it was kinda cute not gonna lie"
"oh god" you snicker.
"hey did you find someone to take to yongin?" you ask, remebering chearyong talking about wanting to find someone to share gas expenses with in exchange for a ride to her hometown.
"oh yea, i did" she turn to you "i think you know him, seo changbin?"
You furrow your brows in thought, you feel like you've heard of the name.
"he's a music major, one year above us, hes also from yongin" she continues folding a pair of jeans "funny you'd ask actually cause he told me one of his friends was looking for a ride to seoul, isn't that where you're going?"
"Yea i was thinking about finding someone honestly because gas is really fucking expensive if you aint rich" you say, placing your laptop onto your nightstand.
"Mm you aint gotta tell me girl" chaeryong mumbles, folding a sweatshirt.
"so who's that friend?" you ask, stretching out on your bed.
"he's in his grade, hyunjin"
Your neck almost cracks from how fats you whip your head “hwang hyunjin?”
"Oh yea" she points at you "you know him?"
"unfortunately" you huff.
"o-oh, what"s the tea?" your roommate wiggles her brows at which you shake your head.
"nothing much really" you sigh, leaning back again "he's just like the most arrogant and stuck up fuckboy ever"
"wow, well thats not nothing" chaeryong laughs "any reason as to why you think that?"
"you could probably ask any girl on campus and she'll tell you the same" you scoff.
"really girl?" chaeryong squints an eye at you playfully "cause i've only heard of him being hot but never of him being a hoe. And you know i'm the first to know the hot gossip" she winks.
Laughing defeatedly, running your hand through your hair.
"it's just- we hit it off at the campus' new years eve party, like really hit it off- at least thats what i thought"
"oooh spill it spill it" chaeryong leaps over to your bed to sit at the end of it.
"well there's really not much to spill, i gave him my number and he was talking all that smack about taking me out and stuff aaand to make a long story short i never heard from him again"
"well" chaeryong speaks slowly, biting her lip guiltily "i dont think you'll be very happy about me giving changbin your number for him, then?"
"you did what???" your eyes almost pop out of your head.
"sooorryy" she jumps up from your bed, clutching her hands apologetically "i didnt know"
"aaaaarghh" you whine, burying your face in your pillow.
"maybe he won't even text you though" chaeryong tries to console you, but the damage is already done...
-
unknown number - hey i got this number from changbin, i heard you're driving up to seoul, i'd love to tag along if you're looking for someone to share expenses with -recieved at 9:12 am
You huff looking at the message on your phone.
After chaeryong had left last night you really convinced yourself that he couldn't possibly dare to reach out to you.
But here you are reading his message after just waking up, and your day is already ruined.
you - who is this? - sent at 9:56 am
You know who it is, but you're not going to give him the satisfaction of thinking that you do.
Scoffing when he answers almost immediately.
unknown number - this is hyunjin, did i reach the right person? - recieved at 9:57 am
You have two choices at this point.
1. be petty and bitter about a boy who probably doesn't even remember you.
Or 2. move on and help someone who is also just trying to get home and also maybe get some closure.
So you curse your mother for rasing you so well and suck it up.
you - yea sure, i planned on leaving tomorrow at around 6 pm - sent at 10:02 am
Damn you and your common human decency.
he sus - oh okay great :) i only have one suitcase and a backpack btw so i wont take up alot of space or anything - recieved at 10:05 am
he sus - also i feel weird bc i dont know ur name or anything changbin literally just sent me the number and nothing else lol, also 6 sounds good should we meet at the main building then? -sent at 10:06 am
You're quite honestly not shocked that he seems nice over text because he was the same when you met on new years eve.
you - sure lets meet at the main building, my car is white and my name is y/n - sent at 10:09 am
Cringing as you press the send button because you are 99% certain he won't answer anymore; not that you'd care, obviously.
he sus - alright y/n see you tomorrow at 6 then :) - recieved at 10:14 am
You raise your brows when your phone lights up with his message, does he really not remember you?
Was he that drunk?
Well, it doesnt matter because you don't want to pay for all this gas alone and he seems to be the next best option to fix that.
So you shrug it off and get out off bed to run some last errands and start packing.
-
Your heart is beating unreasonably fast when you take a turn towards the main building at 5:55 pm the next day.
Calm down y/n it’ll just be 5 hours and who says you have to talk to him?
However you do know deep in your heart that you only wanted to arrive just a little early so you could complain about him being late.
That plan got cut short because your eyes fall on him as you pull up to the main building.
He’s- oh my god he’s blonde. You stop your car and he looks up at you.
“it is you!” hyunjin smiles at you when you step out of the car.
“who else would it be?” you ask, a little irritated at his reaction.
His face drops a bit when he sees you clearly annoyed by him, but the doesn’t blame you; he’d be mad too.
You open your trunk for him to put his weirdly small suitcase into, looking him up and down as he lifts it inside.
He’s wearing dark baggy pants and a windbreaker jacket, the top part of his chin-length blonde hair is pulled back into a messy ponytail.
He seemed to have bulked up as well, shoulders looking broader than what you remember.
The hair is different than the jet black hair that you remember on him, but it suits him very well; to be honest he would look good in any hair colour, not that you’d care though.
The first thirty minutes of the ride go by agonizingly slow and in complete silence.
When you drive onto the freeway you can’t take it anymore and mumble something among the lines of ‘wanna listen to some music?’.
You don’t wait for an answer, pressing the radio button right as you finish your sentence.
“uh, actually” hyunjin starts, his hand lifting to turn the radio back off, your eyes snap towards him, is he serious? Turning off your radio in your car?
“I wanted to address this situation” he says rather quietly.
You scoff “what? You realized that this is awkward just now?”
“no- I mean- yes I understand why you would think that but I just really want a chance to explain myself” he stutters.
“explain yourself” you repeat after him before mumbling “sure because there’s so much to explain”
“listen, I know you think I’m an asshole who just ghosted you b-“
“listen, I can handle rejection, you could’ve just said that you weren’t looking for something serious and I would’ve accepted that. The thing I’m mad about though is you literally making false promises and shit” 
Hyunjin blinks at you “can I please just explain to you what happened?”
You let out a long huff “sure” you wave your hand “go ahead”
“when you and your friends left at around 4, you wrote your number on my arm with your eyeliner, correct?” he asks.
Glancing over at him, you nod.
“after you where gone, I was already pretty drunk but then my friends decided to drag me with them to a different party that was still going” you see him fiddling with his hands in your peripheral “well I got super fucking shitfaced at that party and ended up puking on this one guys shoes”
You raise your eyebrows and hold back a laugh, which he notices.
“its okay you can laugh” he chuckles as well.
“anyways that guy was not very happy about it and busted my lip before kicking me and my friends out, so then back in the dorm my roommate sat me in the shower because I was full of alcohol, blood and puke”
“ew” you chime in.
“and when I woke up the next morning your number was gone” hyunjin looks over at you “we don’t have any mutual friends, I didn’t know what your major is so I couldn’t even asks for you in the administrating office, and then the covid lockdown happened and here we are”
“you called the administrating office?” you look over at him, he nods a little smile on his stupid pretty lips.
“yep, so, sorry to tell you but your eyeliner is not waterproof” he jokes at which you playfully knit your brows at him.
“believe me, I wanted to text you. I really wanted to take you out; and when you sent me your name yesterday I didn’t know if this was a lucky coincidence or if you’re a different y/n, that’s why I didn’t say anything” he explains.
You take a deep breath as you realize you have to apologize for going off on him just now, you believe him but you hate apologizing.
“well, I feel like an ass for going off on you like that after hearing all this” you chuckle “I’m sorry” you eye him shortly before looking back on the road.
“it’s okay, you don’t have to apologize I get how it looked, very much sus” he laughs with you.
-
Coming back to your car after you took a bathroom break on a highway rest-stop, you see hyunjin sitting in the drivers seat.
“what do you think you’re doing?” you smile as you sit down on the passenger seat.
“I thought maybe you’d like to sleep since its dark already and you’ve been driving for almost 3 hours” he suggests while putting on his seatbelt.
“well, I wont say no to that” you shrug and put your seatbelt on as well.
“so when did you go blonde?” you ask curiously.
“uh- around end of june” hyunjin chuckles “it was a dare if I’m being honest but I ended up liking it and got it redone”
“oh okay” you check out his profile once more and follow his hair with your eyes “I like it”
“yea?”
“yea, which is weird cause I’m usually not into blondes at all” you wonder.
“hm” he grins “must be me then” he says before winking at you.
“pfff, in your dreams” you rebuttal playfully, at which he laughs and mumbles a ‘true’.
You don’t react to it because you think your ears are playing tricks on you.
“hey I have a question too” hyunjin says.
“what’s up” you lean your arm against the window as you look over at him.
His face is slightly lit by the lights of the other cars, no seriously, how can a side profile be so perfect?
“why did you even agree to take me with you if you thought I ghosted you?” he grins.
You laugh “well, I’m a nice person and I know not a lot of people there are from seoul and my mom raised me right, okay?”
“okay okay” he giggles, the way his eyes crinkle when he does makes you smile everytime.
“or…did you have such a good time with me on new years that you just had to jump on this opportunity?” he quips, carefully stealing a peek at you.
“sure, why do you think I was so upset when you didn’t text” you feign sadness.
The both of you laugh before falling into comfortable silence.
When looking outside your window, you think back to said new years eve.
-(flashback)
“oh my god” you said, stepping into the big hall that usually is the universities gym. But whoever planned this outdid themselves.
A dj was placed on one of the tribunes and a whole buffet of drinks and punches on the other, as well as a big disco ball hanging from the ceiling, making the room shimmery and shiny.
You could see people coming out of the doors that connected into the universities hall on one side and into the locker rooms on the others, as if it wasn’t already packed.
“this is fucking insane” lia, your roommate from last semester, squeaked while grabbing your arm and jumping a little, her voice overpowering the blasting music..
“I wanna get fucking hammered tonight” you turned to her.
“oh babe don’t worry,  we didn’t come here to drink soda” she laughed before spotting some of your other friends.
About five minutes before midnight you and some more girls gathered at the buffet of drinks and started doing shots.
You all had decided that instead of kissing someone at 12 o’clock you’d ring in 2020 with a shot, because alcohol can’t cheat on you.
You were laughing at something when some people started the countdown.
10!
9!
8!
7!
6!
5!
4!
3!
2!
1!
“HAPPY NEW YEAR”
Every one shouted and celebrated in union as you downed your shot.
“happy new year babe” lia hugged you after downing hers.
“happy new year!” you shouted into her ear, full of relief that this stressful year was over.
“lets do another one” she grinned widely after your whole friend group had shared their wishes with each other.
A girl you didn’t know very well handed you another shot, just as you emptied your glass you heard a guy yell something before stumbling into your back.
“jesus” you stumbled forward a bit before turning around, ready to throw someone a dirty look.
“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” in front of you suddenly stood a tall dark haired young man with almost too perfect facial features, frowning a little out of concern.
“nothing happened” you smiled, taking a step towards him so he’d hear you better.
“I’m glad” he replied, a grin slowly stretched across his handsome face
“I’m y/n” you giggled as you held out your hand.
His eyes crinkled with his smile as he took your hand in his “I’m hyunjin” he said before pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.
“okay guys let her have her fun lets go over there” you hear lia usher your friends away from behind you.
“happy new year y/n” he said before instinctively pulling you a little closer to him when a group of people passed behind you.
“happy new year hyunjin” you replied, a slow blush creeping on your face from how intensely he was taking in your appearance.
“well yea happy fucking new years to me for running into you” he joked before taking a sip, your brain wasn’t able to function anymore so you just giggled and nervously pushed your hair behind your ear.
It had been way too long since you’d talked to a guy, especially someone as attractive as him
“you’re fucking stunning” hyunjin complimented you and lifted your hand with his to make you spin for him, to which you complied because you took a long time getting ready and always appreciate being appreciated.
“thank you” you were crimson red by now but hoped he wouldn’t see because of the dimmed lights.
“how come I’ve never seen you around? I would’ve remembered you” he tilted his head.
“oh this was my first year here and I live on the other side of campus so…” you nodded slowly “but yea I would’ve remembered you too”
He grinned before downing his drink and putting on the table next to the both of you.
“wanna dance?”
That’s how you found yourself on the dance floor with hyunjin pressed against your back.
Slowly but surely the alcohol made you braver; and it didn’t take long for the dj to play perfect songs to grind yourself against his toned body to.
His reaction was instant, hands gripping even harder at your waist and his own movements matching your own.
You looked back at him just to have the air knocked out of your lungs, a barely there sheen of sweat was covering his forehead; his pupils were dilated and his lips were slightly parted before his tongue swiftly swept over his lower lip.
He looked like sex on legs and moved like it too.
His plump lips formed into a grin when he noticed you staring, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol running through your system but you so desperately wanted to kiss him.
“can’t stop looking at you either, pretty” he lowered his head to mumble against your cheek before pressing a kiss there.
“you’re so goddamn sexy” you blurted out as you turned around to face him, running one of your hands through his dark hair before positioning them on his firm chest.
He threw back his head as his chest vibrated with laughter.
“don’t laugh at me” you laughed as you locked eyes again.
“you’re cute when you’re drunk” hyunjin brought one hand to your face to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
“you dont even know me sober” you giggle “also i’m not drunk!” you protested playfully, his hands found your waist in the meantime to pull you flush to his body; at which you gasped almost inaudibly.
“oh really?” he looked down at you, clearly amused “didn’t you drink like 5 shots half an hour ago?”
“well well well, I didn’t know I had an audience” you countered, looping your arms around his neck.
Hyunjin prodded at the inside of his cheek with his tongue before looking away for a swift second, slightly embarrassed because he just exposed himself.
You felt yourself gush a little when he licked his lips again after bringing his gaze back to you.
“so you almost knocked me over on purpose?” you grinned even bigger when he shook his head laughingly.
“listen” he chuckled, leaning down unnecessarily close because you could hear him perfectly fine but you weren’t going to complain.
“I actually didn’t run into you on purpose, that was my friends doing after he saw me notice you” he said.
You mouthed an ‘ahh’ while nodding, feigning disbelief.
“I’m serious” hyunjin laughed “I still have to thank him later; I would’ve probably chickened out”
He got quieter at the end of his sentence, his eyes jumping to your lips when you wet your lower lip with your tongue quickly.
“i-m glad he pushed you then” you replied, trying to hide the fact that your heart was pumping your blood in record time.
“yea” he inched his face closer to yours as you tilted your chin up to meet him in the middle “me too”
His eyes switched from your lips to your eyes one more time before closing the gap between the both of you.
His lips were firm but soft at the same time in the way they moulded against yours, you swore you could hear lia squealing from somewhere but maybe you were just hearing things.
But when his tongue touched yours in the most tentative way you lost contact to what was going on around you, slinging your arms tighter around his neck and deepening the kiss.
A tiny groan escaped hyunjins throat when you carded your fingers through his hair to tug on it and release some of the adrenalin that rushed through you.
He was slow and explorative and let you take control from time to time before sucking on your lower lip and making you loose it.
You didn’t know how many songs had passed; to be honest you didn’t even remember what song was playing when you started kissing.
All you knew in that moment was hyunjins lightly flushed cheeks, swollen lips and dark glistening eyes.
“let’s go somewhere else?” he questioned in a whisper when you bit your lip, nodding at his question.
He grabbed your hand in his before manoeuvring the both of you through the dancing and celebrating crowd.
Before you knew it, hyunjin pulled you into the entrance hall of the university where multiple people had the same idea as you.
Couples scattered across the big room, some just talking, most of them however making out heavily.
“come on” he softly tugged at your hand, smiling when your gaze falls on him.
He lead you up the big flight of stairs onto a floor of the building you’ve never been to, stopping in front of a random room before pulling a small set of keys out of his back pocket.
After unlocking the door, he opened it to let you step inside.
It was a dance studio, the wall right across from you was just one huge mirror through which you could see the big couch in the back of the room and the water dispensers next to it.
“why do you have the keys for this room?” you asked, giggling.
Hyunjin grinned as he closed the door “I’m a dance major, we all have keys for the practice rooms”
“that’s so cool” you beamed “I wish I could dance” you looked around the room, walking towards the mirrored wall a little bit.
“you were moving just fine earlier” hyunjin came up behind you, nimble hands finding your waist as he looked you up and down through the mirror intensely, now that you were under the bright lights of the room.
You couldn’t help but to smile a little at that, the tight little glitter dress that you had chosen really did accentuate your curves in the best way possible, paired with the cute black heels which made your legs look way longer than they actually are.
“but that was like club sexy dancing, you know?” you elaborated.
“hm” he hummed amusedly “whats wrong with sexy club dancing?” you turned around to him.
He didn’t look to shabby himself, all in black, a chic button up with some jeans and a belt; accessorized with rings on his pretty fingers, a  dainty silver necklace and some small earrings.
Some might say he was underdressed, but the way he carried himself with such confidence, and that face of his must for sure be a panty dropper, you thought.
“nothing but… I don’t know, teach me something” you pleaded.
“what do you want me to teach you?” he laughed.
“I don’t know a pirouette or something” you suggested, laughing as well.
“okay” he grinned “this is like the base stance” he positioned himself correctly before looking at you to see if you were following his instructions.
“mhm” you hummed, replicating what he was doing.
“and then you get momentum with one leg to be able to swing yourself around, like this” hyunjin explained before executing a perfect pirouette and ending it back in the base stance.
“that was fast” you chuckled.
“your turn” he grins before moving behind you “try to keep your eyes on yourself in the mirror otherwise you’ll loose balance”
“okay” you said unsurely.
“I’ll catch you if you fall” he winked at you, at which you scoff playfully before carefully swinging yourself into a pirouette.
You landed on wobbly legs but before you could tip over hyunjin stabilized you with a firm grip on your hips.
“you’re a natural” he grinned at you through the mirror.
“well thank you” you playfully feigned cockiness before he spun you around himself.
A few seconds pass of the both of you taking in each others features in silence, the only thing you could hear was the faint music of the party downstairs, before hyunjin spoke up.
“can I kiss you?”
You fell into giggles again as you let your forehead rest against his collarbone before looking up again “we’ve kissed before”
“yea but that was like a moment and I don’t want to catch you off guard or anything” he mumbles cutely.
“mm” you nod “ you can kiss me”
And with a smile, he does.
You weren’t surprised when his first gentle ministrations turned into more desperate ones rather quickly because you could feel the warmth spread in your lower regions as well.
He walked the both of you over to the couch, only parting from your lips when he sat down on the black leather material of the couch.
“come here, pretty girl” he took your hand to help you straddle him, your dress riding up but you couldn’t care less if he saw your safety shorts, and he didn’t seem to care either by the way he feverishly connected your lips again.
His hands travelled down to squeeze at your waist before smoothing over your ass and grabbing a handful of each cheek, you moaned into the kiss when you realized how big his hands were.
Your own hands were squeezing at his shoulders before one moved into his soft hair while the other softly rested on his cheek.
The kiss was messy and desperate, teeth clinking together and tongues licking at each other.
The things that riled you up the most however were his groans and praises.
“you’re so fucking sexy” he groaned before moving down to kiss at your jaw and down your neck.
A needy whimper escaped from your throat when he started suckling the sensitive skin at the base of your throat.
“fuck-hyunjin” you moaned when his teeth grazed over your clavicle.
Your hands fumbled before landing on his belt, at which he pulled away from your skin, gently taking your hands off of his belt.
“I’d love to take you out first, actually” his pretty kiss swollen lips twitched up into a shy smile as he pants.
“oh” you were taken aback, you were almost certain that this was something regular for him “I thought-“
“I mean if you just want to fuck we can fuck of course” he chuckled “but- I actually think you’re really cute and fun and I’d love to get to know you better”
Your mouth stood a little agape “uh- I mean-I” you stuttered, your brain not functioning properly because of the alcohol running through your veins but also him!
“its okay if you just want, you know-“
“no!” you blurted out all over sudden, making him flinch a little “sorry, uhm- its just been a while since I had a date” you smile apologetically.
His expression visibly brightens “that’s okay” he giggled “so is that a yes?”
You grinned, leaning in to just barely brush your lips with his, his head twitching upwards in an attempt to connect them fully.
“yes” you whispered, at which he smiled brightly before pulling your in for a kiss by your neck.
-(flashback end)
“y/n”
“hey, y/n” you grumble when you feel someone gently rocking your shulder.
“mmm-what?” you peek your eyes open just to see hyunjin smile at you.
“good morning sunshine” he teases as you sit up in your seat when you realize you aren’t driving anymore.
“just kidding its not morning” he says as you look around your car, realizing your on a parking lot.
“where the fuck are we?” you whip your head towards him “did you bring me here to kill me? kidnap me?”
“wha?- no” he laughs “no, I’m sorry. Right after you fell asleep there was this huge traffic jam because of an accident and we stood there for almost 3 hours so I drove off and found this” he points out the rear window, where you see a small motel building.
You look back at him before checking the time on your phone, seeing it was indeed almost midnight.
“fuck” you swear to yourself.
“I didn’t know if you wanted to keep driving because I was getting tired so I thought maybe-“ hyunjin starts rambling guiltily, not wanting you to thing that this was an attempt to get in your pants.
“hey” you put your hand on his shoulder after taking off your seatbelt “this is good, you made the right decision I think we both could use some sleep” you say.
You each take your suitcases and walk inside, it’s an old building but it looks pretty clean for a motel off of the highway.
“good evening you two” an old lady sits behind the, probably just as old, reception.
“good evening, could we get 2 single rooms, please” hyunjin speaks up politely.
“I’m afraid we only have 2 double bed rooms available, if you’d like to take them, they will however be more expensive than the rooms for one” she explains politely.
“its okay, we’ll take one of those, please” you decide, hyunjins head snapping towards you.
“is that okay?” you ask him.
“yea- sure” he nods.
“alright, room 301 it is” she hands you the key before stating that you’ll have to checkout before 12 pm and what the room costs.
“do you accept card?” hyunjin asks at which the friendly old lady nods before taking his card and swiping it through her little machine.
“I’ll venmo you half of what you paid” you say after unlocking room 301.
He tsk’s at you before shaking his head “don’t, it was my idea so I’ll pay”
“are you sure?” you ask closing the door behind you when he turns on the lights.
“yup-oh” he exclaims.
“this room is cute” you say, it’s small but the walls are a soft sunflower yellow, decorated with paintings of autumn leaves .
The bed looks clean, and when you smell the mouse gray blankets and pillows, they smell fresh as well.
“stop smelling the pillows” hyunjin laughs.
“I’ve never been to a motel, I thought everything would be dirty or ancient” you confess comically.
He chuckles as he comes out of the small bathroom “the bathroom is clean too, don’t worry” he says when you look at him expectantly.
“I’ll sleep on the floor if you want” he offers as you open your suitcase to get out your toothbrush and pj’s.
“it’s fine, hyunjin I’ve slept in the same bed as a male before” you joke.
“well how am I supposed to know that?” he counters, at which you throw your pj shorts at him out of reflex.
When you realize what you had done it was too late, he was already holding them out in front of him before giggling.
“very cute choice” he mocks the small white shorts with red hearts all over it.
“stoop” you whine, trying to fish it out of his hands but he holds them over his head like a kindergartener.
“I remember why I don’t like you” you pout, crossing your arms.
His face drops alongside with his arms “I thought we were past that”
You use his moment of weakness to snatch your shorts out of his hands “gotcha”
-
“see I told you I was gonna take you out” hyunjin beams at you before looking down at the various snacks he took from the motels vending machine, which were laying in between the both of you on the bed.
“and so luxurious too” you joke, crossing your legs.
“only the best for you” he grins when you open a pack of fruit jellies.
“you know, I was thinking about new years” you say “ and I realized that it was your fault!”
Hyunjin throws his head back as he groans playfully “why?”
“if you hadn’t lost your phone when we got back downstairs, I wouldn’t have had to write my number on your arm; or you could’ve just given me your number and I could’ve text you. But you didn’t even know your own number!” you laugh in reminiscence.
“listen” he laughs “I was drunk and you’re hot! I couldn’t think” he defends himself before taking a bite off a chocolate bar.
You blush a little but play it off with a laugh.
“but yes, I admit, it was indeed my fault” he dramatically holds his hand in front of his eyes.
“yeeees!” you exclaim victoriously.
“I’m kidding though” you pat his knee “I forgive you”
“I’m glad” he smiles.
After the both of you are done eating way too many sweets, you find yourself being really comfortable when talking to hyunjin.
He’s funny, doesn’t seem like he’s full of himself and just in general seems like a very kind person.
“I thought you were a fuckboy when me met” you confess, looking at him.
Propped on one elbow looking down at you, while you lay on your side towards him, his face illuminated only by the little lights on each of your nightstands.
“you did?” he asks confusedly.
“yea” you chuckle “you were so confident and…sexy I don’t know” you place your hand over your face in embarrassment.
“oh that was the liquid courage talking, I’m usually pretty shy” he shakes his head smilingly when you peek through your fingers.
“don’t lie” you push his shoulder softly.
“I’m serious!” he laughs.
“you were the first guy to approach me at a party” you pause “like ever”
“no way, you’re lying now” he furrows his brows.
“nope” you shake your head.
“but I was really close to not talking to you as well, I’m sure there were many guys before me that just didn’t have the liquid courage, like I did” he speculates.
“maybe” you say.
“have any exes?” he asks after a few seconds.
“yea, one”
“well how did you meet him?”
“he showed me around on my first day of freshman year, I transferred like in the middle of the first semester so I wasn’t with any other freshmen” you tell him.
“why’d you break up if I may ask?” hyunjin asks carefully.
“oh we were only together for like three weeks, you can’t even call I relationship. He used me to make his hot ex jealous and cheated on me with her” you say “but hey they’re back together at least” you scoff.
“i’m sorry” he mumbles at which you look up at him.
“it’s not your fault” you chuckle.
“well, still no one should feel that way” he says “you know that you were way too good for him right?”
You nod.
“what about you? Have any exes?” you ask back.
He snickers “only one in seoul”
“why didn’t you last?”
“it was a long distance situation, she was super jealous and couldn’t trust me. which I can understand to a certain degree but everytime I went out she wanted me to facetime her and show her what kinds of people were there with me. That was just too much” he explains.
“wow” you chuckle “that doesn’t sound fun either”
Hyunjin shakes his head “nope, but hey we got rid of ‘em, didn’t we?”
“yea” you giggle “plus if I hadn’t broken up with him I would’ve probably never gone to the new years eve party”
“I guess I owe him something then” he grins as you scooch up on the bed.
“can I kiss you?” you ask after a few seconds of silence.
“hm?” hyunjins eyes almost spring out of his head.
“I don’t want to catch you off guard” you grin as you repeat his words from the night you met, sitting up.
He licks his lower lip as a grin stretches over his face as he sits up as well “do your worst”
You get up on your knees to shuffle over to him, when you get close enough hyunjin grabs one of your thighs and lifts it over his legs so you’re straddling him.
Once you sit down on his lap, your eyes lock again and you’re once again baffled as to how someone can be so god damn attractive.
His eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips expectantly, a shaky breath leaving his lips when you lean in.
Your lips connect and it feels like all the pent up energy of liking him since that night finally gets set free, sparks glowing behind your lit and his hands leaving a trail of fire where ever they go.
They squeeze at your thighs and waist, pulling you impossibly close to himself.
A whimper tears from your throat when his tongue licks at yours, he tastes like chocolate and what could only be described as him.
He moans into the kiss when you tug at the blonde locks that weren’t pulled back into the ponytail; before pulling the hair tie out of his hair to free it and finally card your fingers through all of the blonde glory.
Before you realize what’s going on, hyunjin lifts the both of you before dropping you on your back and crawling above you.
The fact that he just lifted the both of you from a sitting position as if you weigh nothing makes you feel all types of hot.
“you’re so hot holy shit” you pant as you push his long hair out of his face.
“ditto” he only grins before attaching his lips to your exposed collarbone and sucking a bruise into the skin.
“take it off” you moan as you tug on the dark blue calvin klein shirt he’s wearing.
His lips release the skin of your collarbone before sitting up to pull the shirt over his head.
If your mouth wasn’t already open from your heavy breathing, you would’ve opened it now because his body is more sculpted and toned than you had expected.
Your hand lifts to smooth over his abs, muscles flexing as he connects your lips again.
His one hand slides from your waist up to cup one of your breasts, gently palming the soft flesh.
“I know I said I wanted to take you out first but-“ he mumbles against your lips.
“you bought me a lovely dinner” you interrupt him, threading your fingers through the hair that’s falling down into his vision.
He grins, dropping a short peck to your lips before his the grin gets wiped off his face “I don’t have a condom with me”
“I’m on the pill” you let him know “I got tested before the lockdown and I haven’t been with anyone since soo…”
“yea, me too, I was tested a few months ago” he nods.
You nod back, biting your lip as you absently play with his hair.
“do you trust me?” hyunjin asks, observing your demeanour.
“yea- yea I do I’m just nervous” you smile awkwardly.
“no” he coos before kissing you “why are you nervous?”
“just haven’t been with anyone for a while” you confess.
Hyunjin nods understandingly “if you don’t want to do this we’ll stop”
“no I really want to” you look into his eyes as confidently as you can.
“okay” he smiles, planting his lips on yours again.
“can i?” his voice gives you goosebumps when he mumbles against the sensitive skin under your ear, his fingers slowy undoing the loose knot of your heart shorts.
“yes” you say when he locks eyes with you.
“I love these shorts” he softly presses a kiss to your knee, trying to calm your nerves a little, before he gently rocks your hips to pull them off of you.
You blush a little out of embarrassment but smile when you lift your hips to help him.
“cute” he whispers when he see’s your panties have a little bow on the front.
He chuckles when you hide your face in embarrassment, pulling you closer to him again by your thighs before you let him kiss you again.
“can I take this off too?” hyunjin whispers, softly pulling at the fabric of the tank top you’re wearing, at which you nod.
You are still wearing a bra when he pulls it off so you take it into your own hands and unclasp your bra.
Your nipples stiffen a little at the sudden exposure to air, as well as to hyunjin’s admiring gaze.
“fuck” he muses when palming your breasts in his big hands, gently pushing them together an running his thumbs over your nipples.
A whimper involuntarily leaves your lips when he wraps his plump lips around one of the perked up nubs and sucks gently.
“so fucking pretty, princess” you feel yourself pathetically clench around nothing at his praise.
You feel one of his hands wander downwards to provide some friction for you, he slots his lips against yours when you tentatively roll your hips against his hand.
Hyunjin feels his cock get even harder when an almost desperate moan tumbles from your lips against his. So he ads a little more pressure and starts circling your clit with two fingers, your sighs of pleasure mixing into the kiss.
“you’re so sensitive baby” he whispers as he parts his lips from yours “can I go down on you?” he grazes his lips over your chest, looking up at you seductively.
You nod as you bite your lip, hyunjin placing a few kisses on your tummy before shortly sitting up to also free you from your soaked panties.
The first stripe he licks up your slit, and how he swirls the tip of his tongue around your clit expertly sends you to heaven.
His hands are gripping your thighs to prevent you from closing your legs, your hands are tangled in his hair and the sheets.
“hyunj-fuck” you cry out when his tongue enters you.
He carefully prods one finger at your entrance “is that okay?” he asks, his voice hoarse and dripping with lust.
“yea” you sigh.
Once you adjust to one finger, he adds a second one, curling them upwards to search for that specific patch inside of you.
“yes-fuck right there” you moan when his fingers press onto the sweetest spot inside of you, tugging at his hair a little harshly. But you feel him moan against you, getting lost in your taste as he sucks your clit in between his soft lips.
Your hips buckle against his mouth as your eyes roll backwards, feeling the warmth of your orgasm approach rapidly.
“fuck fuck yes-hyunjin” you cry out just before he tipped you over the edge with his skillful ministration, your orgasm rushing up your spine and into your head, endorphins spreading everywhere.
A cry of pleasure fills the room as your thighs starts trembling with the aftershocks, clamping around his head when he drives you into overstimulation.
“oh-shit-“ you pant as you softly pushed on his forehead to get him away from your clit, his fingers still inside you, guiding you through your high.
He nibbles on your inner thigh apologetically. You can still hear your heartbeat in your ears after hyunjin removes his fingers from you and sits up, gently holding your legs together to help you calm down.
“fuck” you mewl, a soft smile tugging at his lips.
He’s wanted to do this for so long and there you are, with all of your naked glory in front of him.
While he’s daydreaming about you, you sit up and start fiddling with his sweatpants.
“you want more?” he quips, once he realises what you’re doing, leaning in to kiss you.
“mhm” you humm into the kiss affirmitavely when his hand holds you close to him by your jaw.
With a quick last peck to your lips he simultaneously shimmies the soft black sweats and his boxers off of himself.
You apparently visibly gulp at the sight of his cock because hyunjin smirks cockily “like what you see?” as he crawls above you again, his lips finding yours again and not waiting for an answer.
“I don’t know if you’ll fit” you mumble when he suckles at the soft nook of skin under your ear.
“we can stop here” he offers softly before locking eyes again.
You shake your head as you reach down to fist his length, slowly pumping it and smearing the few drops of precum around.
“no, you’re just really big” you huff with a shy smile on your lips at which hyunjin groans.
“you’re gonna be the death of me, you know?” he mutters against your lips before kissing you deeply, his hand smoothing over the slope of your waist before coming up to gently pinch at one of your nipples.
Eliciting a soft high pitched moan from you, this only spurs him on.
Rolling his tongue against yours desperately and making you taste yourself before sinfully sucking at the wet muscle.
All the while you’re stroking him with your small hand before cupping his balls, as if he didn’t already feel like he’s gonna blow his load way too early.
“please” you whine, guiding his reddened tip towards your entrance.
Hyunjin releases a shaky breath before replacing your hand with his, rutting his hips against yours a few times, coating his length in your wetness.
This already had your toes curling, suppressing a whine as you lock your legs around his waist.
“tell me if it hurts, yea?” he breathes, only pressing inside you after you nod, dropping a kiss to your swollen lips.
“fuck” he swears softly, tucking his face in the crook of your neck when he breaches your tight walls for the first time.
Your fingers tighten in his hair at the back of his neck when a subtle sting flares up inside of you.
“ah-“ your body flinches a little when he presses further inside, hyunjin notices, observing your expression before kissing your cheek and sitting up slowly.
“you’re doing so good, baby” he lifts his thumb to his lips, swiftly kitten-licking the digit before bringing it to where your bodies join.
Gently rolling your clit under his thumb to distract you from the pain.
“you look so perfect like this” his other hand travels over your stomach to gently squeeze at your breasts “all spread out for me”
You whimper, arching your back when hyunjin thrusts into you carefully; the pain slowly subsiding and the ache to be fully filled up by him growing exponentially when his cock rubs against your g spot.
“hyunjin” you moan, gripping onto his hand, which is resting atop your breast.
“yes baby, I’m here” he groans at how tight you feel once he’s balls deep inside of you, abandoning your clit to grab you by the hips for leverage.
His other hand resting on your cheek now, after a few trusts you moan “harder, please”
Hyunjin groans and fulfils your wish, at one particularly harsh thrust, you latch your lips around his pointer and middle finger, sucking at them.
“oh my god-that’s so fucking hot” he grunts through clenched teeth.
His cock dragging along your walls deliciously, filling you up to the brim as you hum around his slender fingers in pleasure.
“you like my hands that much baby?” his jaw is clenched and the grip on your waist is rough , the contrast to how sweet he was just a few minutes earlier had you clench around him furiously.
“fuck-“ he breathes when you nod to the best of your abilities, eyes wide open and holding his gaze.
You only release his fingers from in between your lips in favour for a loud high pitched moan when his other hand finds your clit again, rubbing harsh circles into the bud.
“-gonna cum-huynjin” you dig your nails into his biceps, eyes squeezing shut.
“yea?” he grits through his teeth the fingers that were previously trapped in your mouth now wrapping around your bared throat.
Not squeezing tightly, just resting there as if to show you that you’re his now.
Your thought gets confirmed when he rasps “you’re gonna date me after this, right pretty girl?”
You do look so pretty right now, tits bouncing and skin slapping because of the fast rhythm that he’s snapping his hips into yours, not to mention the subtle sheen of sweat that’s coating the both of you.
A desperate breathy chuckle tumbles from your lips “ yes-yes fuck” you feel your second orgasm creeping up on you.
“cum for me princess, all over my cock” he urges you on, his tip hammering into the sweet spot inside of you repeatedly before you crash into your second high of the night.
Your body convulses in pleasure as you call out his name mixed with profanities, your toes curling so hard you’re not sure if you can ever uncurl them again, and your nails probably leaving painful indents in his skin.
His thumb on your clit slows down until you grab his hand for him to stop, his hand around your neck grabs your free one, holding both of your hands over your head now.
“so good, baby” he mumbles, kissing your lips; mostly just breathing into each other as he rocks you through every wave of your orgasm.
Hyunjin looses himself in you not long after with a guttural moan and his eyes squeezing shut.
You coax him through it when he rests his face against your neck again, running your fingertips through his damp hair and over his broad back, muscles tensing under your gentle touch.
i“don’t fall asleep on me” you whisper sneakily, grinning when he chuckles against your neck, tickling the soft skin there.
He props himself up again to scan over your features, pushing some hair out of your face before kissing you tenderly.
“you okay?” his hand resting at your temple as he gently runs his thumb over your hairline.
“more than” you assure him, cupping his cheeks to pull his lips onto yours again.You think you can never get enough of his lips, anything about him for that matter; not when he makes you feel so cared about and safe.
“so does this mean we’re dating now?” he whispers after he has cleaned you up and tucked the both of you in bed.
“hmh” you nod your head sleepily, positioned on his bare chest.
“so I can spoon you once we fall asleep?” he asks, grin evident in his voice.
“you can spoon me but you can’t wake me up in the middle of the night if you get horny” you mumble jokingly, enjoying his fingers running down your spine as your eyelids get heavier.
“okay” he giggles softly, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head before you whisper your good nights to each other.
And as promised, he doesn’t wake you up in the middle of the night because he’s horny.
It’s you who wakes him, because after 10 months of wasted time, you have a lot of catching up to do.
-
a/n: oml this is my first ever long fic so pls pls pls give me feedback, i had so much fun writing his even though it made me feel even more single but hey :))))
allsooo i waited til after work to publish this and i just saw i hit 500 followers?!?!?! thats crazy to me omg i started this like 2 months ago and so many ppl liked my stuff so much that they decided to follow me?? so i just wanna say thank u thank u thank u for hitting the follow button even though im very unorganized and everything i do is spontaneaous and not thought out well. but hey i guess there is a reason that u followed me so thank u!
(i’d love if u sent me an ask with the first one of my writings that u stumbled across, and how <3 ...only if u want tho no pressure) 
anyways thank u so much for reading if you’ve made it this far! i hope you have a great day/ night! much love
-aj
(this is a work of fiction and does not represent the real actions of stray kids or hwang hyunjin)
737 notes · View notes
nikrangdan · 4 years
Text
cafeworker!ni-ki
Tumblr media
pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader
genre: fluff, comedy
description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him
**did not proofread
————
contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person
whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there
like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!
anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor
everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know
but to all the strangers? no
they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert
which was so, so wrong
but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020
(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)
moving on......
so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence
you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3
and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school
and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house
u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!
but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings
you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..
u have to talk to the cashier :/
who’s a stranger! even more ://
it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers
you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it
its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to
and now that you think about it
this is the first time you have gone out by yourself
you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”
LIES!!!!
but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it
time to face your fears!
you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies
you loved it already
glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—
hold on
you had to do a double take because WOAH.....
the cashier...
he....
wow..
you have never seen a boy like that in your life
you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu
that was infrONT OF HIM
“hi, what can i get for you?”
HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!
“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”
“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him
hes so nice u almost cried
your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options
its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!
um um um *internally keyboard smashes*
you couldnt even think
the words on the menu were like gibberish
the ONE time u go out by yourself
this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(
picking a random drink you gave him your order
“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”
ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM
u cant help but think hes judging you
he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt
“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine
god you felt your heart stop
his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful
“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile
hopefully it looked like one
“okay that’ll be $5.12.”
you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him
he gave u your change and gave u a small smile
“your drink will be out in a minute”
AAAAA
he went :)
he is so CUTE.....?!?!
he looked around your age too
sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though
you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer
while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone
and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat
‘GUYS’
‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’
‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’
‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’
‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’
you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand
“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there
wow... hes so mesmerizing
you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink
you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink
you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was
it was good by the way
sadly it was your time to leave
taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door
wow
u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever
in your small town?? crazy
you were sitting in your car just thinking
WAIT
U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!
you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing
what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway
LOL
*sad emoji*
but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back
and not just because of the cute boy
...unless....
*time skip*
the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift
AND HE WAS!!!!
score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess
the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city
so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers
“welcome, what would you like to order?”
NOT THIS AGAIN
he looked even cuter today
his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes
you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time
you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name
hmmm
“um y/n” you answered
your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him
he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time
looking at him is literally the highlight of your day
the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance
>:((((
boooo look at me cute boy
nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week
literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen
u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you
hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move
ever
but
he should know u by now
hopefully..
*time skip again*
it was a saturday
at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee
not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday
“hey, what would you like to order?”
woah WHAT
you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time
and you also noticed something on this new cashier
a name tag
how come your old little crush didnt have one????
this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too
looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too
you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register
his name was ‘heeseung’
after taking in these new additions you answered to jay
“oh um.. can i ge-,”
“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”
??!<_|#%[>~€\£~
you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you
was it who you thought it was ??!??!
YES IT WAS!!!!
OH MYGOD
ITS HIM
you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform
instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie
wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better
BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U
“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him
“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you
NI-KI
HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD
u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE
“are you gonna get something too?”
this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on
your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it
“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”
WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|
ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets
u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up
“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you
he kind of had a smile on his face
“i want to.”
there is no way this is happening
“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register
“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung
WHAT??!!??!
your jaw almost dropped from shock
millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything
u cant believe this was happening
it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate
your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table
no way...
you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down
you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart
“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled
“im ni-ki by the way”
“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry
“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off
*passes out*
IM JOKING
Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY
“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon
“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”
HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER
“no its okay!! im glad actually...”
“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly
u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...
“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile
“its okay, i think i am too”
you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school
turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason
u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks
“hows it going guys?”
“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed
you giggled at the sight
jay looked offended and came right back
“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed
ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you
“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked
“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”
ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried
he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks
jay obviously did not care
“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed
u were blushing so hard
NI-KI LIKED U????
this felt like a dream
ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks
awe
but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever
u and ni-ki were so cute together <333
you’d always visit him during ur free time
it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho
and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever
235 notes · View notes
sunsinrinn · 4 years
Text
Secrets Part 11.
Bakugo x reader, Bakugo x Uraraka, Kirishima x Reader
Fluff- ish, language, angst
Word Count: 1,177
Idea: Y/n has a secret to share with bakugo not expecting a secret from him. She leaves heart broken and attempts to move on. But how will she move on if her secret can no longer be hidden? She fakes a relationship hoping its enough to not expose the true origin of the secret. (This is a terrible summary but I cant say much without spoiling future parts. 🙃)
Bakugo rushes to the Hospital and somehow manages to carry you in while you are still crying in pain. He yells for nurses to help and nurses come rushing to your aid
“Sir, what happened?”
“She’s going into labor! But she’s early”
“Okay sir, sit her down on the wheel chair and we will take her to a room where she can began labor.” Bakugo is hesitant to let you go alone but finally sets you down when you yell in pain, “BAKUGO SO HELP ME GOD, IF YOU DON’T SIT ME DOWN I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOU” ‘You’re scary rn’ he thinks and follows the nurse as you’re being taken away. Not long after they have you situated and ready for labor, Kirishima bursts through the door glaring at Bakugo, “YOU! I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOUR ASS-“
“NOT MY FAULT KIRISHIMA I JUST WANTED THE TRUTH.”
“Excuse me gentlemen, if you guys cannot shut up, I will have to kick you both out until Ms. L/N is finished giving birth.” The nurse glares at both of the men. Kirishima looks down, “I’m sorry ma’am.” And walks over to you. You are just attempting to keep calm but feel a contraction, “AHH”
*okay, we are skipping the birth part bc I’m not good at this :P hehe*
“It’s a beautiful and healthy girl! Congratulations Ms. L/N, what would you like to name her?”
“Um.. I’m not completely sure yet. I’d like to talk about it with my partners.”
You look over at Kirishima, and see he is tearing up at the sight of your baby and then you glance at Bakugo, who was sobbing at how beautiful she was.
The nurse nods and leaves you alone with the knuckleheads. “So, what are we naming her?” You ask both of them. But they ignore you as they watch as your baby was being taken away to get properly cleaned up. You roll your eyes and ask again, “What are we naming our baby girl, Dumbasses?” They look at you and Bakugo answers, “Ours?”
“Speaking of that...” Kirishima says right before he smacks Bakugo upside the head, “YOU EVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT AGAIN BAKUGO I WILL PERSONALLY MURDER YOUR ASS. GOT IT” Bakugo nods quickly scared at how Kirishima suddenly became scary-like. “Good, now my angel, what do YOU want to call our kid?”
You think about it for a second, “What about, Nao?”
They both nod and agree with the name. Bakugo stays quiet for a second before speaking up, “What about her last name?”
You and Kirishima stay quiet thinking about it. Bakugo speaks up again, “I understand if you dont want her with my last name...”
“Its- its not that, we were actually thinking of hyphenating both of yours and Eijirou’s last names...” you respond quietly. Bakugo smiles, “That’s a good idea.”
You smile at that, “Bakugo... There’s something we want to talk to you about-“ Kirishima widens his eyes and shakes his head.
“What’s wrong?” Bakugo says confused.
You clear your throat, “um... so... Kirishima and I were talking...”
Bakugo glances at Kirishima and Kirishima pretends to read the wash your hands flyer on the wall,
“Go on Y/N.” Bakugo says impatiently but before you respond the nurse walks in with your baby in tow, “Finally decided on the name, dearie?” You nod.
“Yes Ms., We want to call her Bakugo-Kirishima Nao.”
The nurse hums, “Ah, Nao means honesty such a pretty name.” You nod and think of the irony behind the name. “And two last names? Well that is not common.” You smile and shrug,
“We couldn’t choose a last name so we did both” the nurse nods, “Well, we will have that set up and here is your baby again.” She picks up the baby and hands her to you,
“She might be hungry so you should probably try and feed her.” With that the nurse leaves the four of you alone. You hold your baby close and smile at her. Kirishima and Bakugo crowd you as they try and fight over who gets to carry her first.
“Move out the Shitty Hair, I’m the father I should go first.”
“A dead-beat father, I should carry her first”
“I AM NOT A DEAD-BEAT FATHER, ESPECIALLY IF IM RIGHT HERE!”
You glare at both of them for scaring Nao but notice she did not even flinch at his voice. ‘Wow, used to his voice already.’
“None, of you are carrying her until Nao finishes eating” and with that both men pout like babies and sit down as you begin to feed her.
After a minute of silence, Bakugo speaks up remembering you had to talk.
“Oh yeah, Y/N, you said you needed to tell me something?”
You and Kirishima tense up. ‘Well damn.’
“Oh yeah.... heh, so, uh, its about us.”
“What about us?” Bakugo asks hopefully.
“So me and Kirishima... talked... about how you will fit into our lives now that you know...”
“Do... do you not want me near the baby?” He asks sadly.
“WHAT- no no no... its more about how me and Kirishima- Kiri-baby, why don’t you explain?” You ask him
Kirishima sends you a glare before clearing his throat.
“Bakugo, what she was trying to poorly explain is that- I cant fucking do it babes,”
“Just fucking tell me already.”
“Alright alright Bakugo. Meandy/narelikeinlovewithyoubutwedidntknowhowtosay”
“What the hell did you say Kirishima?”
Kirishima sighs, “Look bakugo, Y/N still has feelings for you. And I have feelings for you to. We are willing to let you be part of our family.”
Bakugo stares in shock unable to say anything.
You and Kirishima look at each other nervously.
“Is this a sick fucking joke?” Bakugo asks angrily.
You flinch, “No... We are being serious. We both like you.”
“YOU BOTH NEED TO STOP FUCKING PLAYING WITH MY EMOTIONS.” He says almost tearing up.
“We are not Bakugo. We are serious. But we have a condition.”
Bakugo sniffs, “You guys love me? Like even after what I did?”
“Bakugo, we know you didn’t mean to but you did hurt me. Uraraka was to blame here... overall we want to give you a second chance.”
“What’s-what’s the condition if I accept.”
“It’s not a hard one. There are only two things you need to do, go to therapy and anger management classes.”
“Thats all?” He asks nervously.
“Yes Bakugo. That’s all.”
“This isn’t a sick joke right?”
“No Bakugo, we are serious.” Kirishima responds for you.
He sheds a tear, “I- I can’t thank you both enough for giving me a chance... I swear to go to therapy, and that class, and thank you for letting me be in my daughter’s life. Thank you so much.” He reaches over to hug Kirishima and lets out a sob. Kirishima pats his back and smiles at you. You smile back and hold Nao tighter as she finishes eating. “You are lucky to have two loving parents little one.” You whisper to her.
Suddenly Kirishima’s phone rings, he looks down and pales, “It’s Mina.”
“Ah crap.”
Tumblr media
SERIES MASTERLIST — Part 12
A/N: an update??? Jeez, sorry about not updating sooner but I got distracted :) I hope you enjoy this chapter! It seems a bit rushed but lmaoo. Anyways Bakugo didn’t get killed yet.
If you’d like to be tagged in future parts or future works dont hesitate to dm, ask, or comment! I hope you guys had a lovely day today! Also if you asked to be tagged and I didnt tag you send me a dm so I can fix it :) also any tags in italics and bold, I couldn’t tag you :/ I’m sorry </3 but I’ll work on it <3
Secrets Taglist: @hero-ink-pillar , @silentw-lkr , @ushiwakatrash , @purple-rabanito , @chaelysian , @puppycat714 , @fake-id-69 , @adaydreaminganon , @jessie9008 , @sam-i-am-1025 , @purple--nebula , @curiouslilbeast , @httpswwwtbhkcom , @setup-the-ace , @chanultis , @kit-kat428 , @thatonefangirl722 , @fxirylightsx , @katsuki-bakubae , @sakurakatsuki , @whatishappinesswhatislove , @wannabedaphne , @casey0407
137 notes · View notes
theouterbankpogues · 4 years
Text
after sarah doesn’t invite kiara to her birthday party (a jj x kiara fic)
author : theouterbankpogues aka vi
fandom : jj x kie, jiara | outer banks on netflix
tags : the angst, the fluff, the hurt, the comfort y’know!!
warnings : none
i love writing for this ship bc it has a chokehold on me and i just... i’m so helpless lmao. i read this hc set by @lemon-patches​ (which you should definitely go and read bc it’s amazing and all the feelings) and it talked about how jj and ki were each other’s first kiss and no one else knows. this is basically how i imagine it happened. enjoy!! as always the validation feeds me so yeah if you like it pls share it and stuff (i love reading tags on reblogs so lmao do with that what u will). i imagine they are 15/16, about 6-8 months before s1 idk if that adds up but lol thats what i went with. sorry for any errors u may find xx
a little preview so u know what you’re getting into hehe: “They stood like that for a while, long and quiet breaths synced, arms entangled in waist and shoulders, hearts rhythmically beating, just enjoying the warmth of the best friend they dearly missed.”
Tears streamed down Kiara’s face. She knew that calling the cops was petty, she knew it was the worst of her manifesting itself, but tonight Ki couldn’t bring herself to care. She found herself toppling some books off of her bookshelf. She had always known that she wasn’t good enough for Sarah. The Sarah Cameron. God, she felt so stupid.
Another wave of regret coursed through her. The pit of her stomach hollowed when she re-remembered that she’d actually listened to her parents and decided to give her kook year a genuine try. She had distanced herself from the cut and the pogues, her best friends, the people that she could always count on, the people who always cared. She gave it all up for the superficial bullshit she knew would eventually fall apart.
That entire evening, the anger and regret approached her in harsh and unforgiving turns. She couldn’t escape her own thoughts, she was so mad at herself. She had let herself become vulnerable, given herself up for someone to use and dispose. She felt so weak. All she really wanted to do was fit in, to have a normal year where she wasn’t disappointing her parents, where she wasn’t out at unreasonable hours getting her friends out of messes, watching their string of luck grow thinner and thinner with every prank and practical joke. She was tired of being the middle between the kooks and pogues, she loved the latter and she could’t escape the part of her that was the former. She just wanted to resign to one side, she just wanted things to get easier. Kiara had decided to leave everything for some peace of mind, and now she knew she’d made a mistake. She hadn’t even checked in with John B, his dad was missing and she hadn’t even checked in with him. God, she felt so stupid. Her sobs overtook her as she sat at her bed.
She was so exhausted from the crying she could scream, it had been a few long hours. And Ki, in a moment of clarity, convinced herself that she was too strong for that. Even though she felt horrible, she reminded herself that she was too careful to let this anger get the best of her. Instead, she resorted to taking a few deep breaths and cleaning up the various books and stationary strewn across her bedroom floor as a remnant of her anger. What had happened had happened, she was just going to have to figure out how to cope on her own.
Yeah, I just have to figure it out on my own. I’ll be fine.
That’s when she heard it.
Thud.
Thud. Thud.
Thud.
‘What the-’
She realised that the sound was coming from her window. Stepping toward the side of her room facing the balcony, she realised that pebbles were currently being thrown at her window by a silhouette below it. She couldn’t tell who it was because the backdoor lights had been switched off for the night. It was well past midnight and her parents were soundly sleeping in the next room, she swore she would never forgive the person currently trying to break her window if they woke up. She didn’t want anyone to see her as the mess she was right now. So as quickly and as safely as Kiara could, she opened the balcony window, “What the actual— JJ? JJ is that you?” Kiara couldn’t really understand what was going on, she had stopped talking to the pogues months ago.
“Yeah, hey Ki! Come down!”
“What?”
“You heard me bro, get dressed and come down!”
After a curt nod, she went back into her room, changed out of her PJ’s into some joggers and a hoodie and found herself sneaking out the back door out of genuine curiosity. When she was outside, she realised that neither Pope nor John B were with JJ. Along with that, she realised that he had two boxes of pizza and some beer cans set down on the grass next to him.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
“I was scrolling through Instagram, realised you weren’t at the party, thought you might need a pick me up,” He seemed to register her tired face and puffy eyes under the dim starlight because he continued, “guess I was right!”
And that’s how, twenty minutes later, JJ and Ki found themselves in a clearing near her house. They sat down opposite each other, the pizza boxes separating them.
“Got your favourite, double cheese, double pepperoni and half the jalapeño.”
Except for the occasional direction here and there, Ki had been quite their entire walk. She couldn’t really even process what was happening. How was JJ here? Why was he talking to her after she’d treated them him like shit the past few months? None of it made sense to her, least of all why this was all from JJ. With all of it perplexing her, the only thing she managed to say was, “You remembered.”
‘Yeah of course I did Ki, just because you stopped talking to us doesn’t mean we stopped caring about you. Come on, dig in, it’s getting cold.”
She didn’t know how to respond to him so she just followed him in picking up a slice from the box. Warm pizza , cold beer and melted cheese heavily complemented the gentle breeze that surrounded them. They fell into a comfortable silence as they ate.
“I’m so sorry.”
“I know Ki-”
“No, everything I did these past few months, the way I cut you guys off, the way I left y’all when you needed me I-”
“Ki we know-”
“God, I’ve been so stupid, I left you guys, like y’all were nothing, y’all needed me and I-”
“Ki, Ki-” Ki just continued, she felt horrible, “KIARA!” JJ saying her full name was so foreign to her, especially since he hadn’t even call her by her nickname these past few months, it undoubtably got her to stop talking.
“I know the pressure your parents put on you to start at that kook academy. Look we all know how hard it is for you to manage these two parts of your life. I know Ki, you don’t have to keep apologising, I know. We know! Why do you think we didn’t try to talk to you when you told us last summer? We want you to do what’s best for you Ki, you are better than us.” At that, Kiara got up and paced back and forth a few steps, remorse hitting her unbearably. 
“I’m not better than any of you. A part of me wanted to leave you all behind.”
JJ’s response was almost instantaneous, “I don’t blame you for it!”
“Well you should! I left you and Pope. I left John B for god’s sake. His dad is most probably dead and I wasn’t theRE.... I-I’m not there.”
At this point the tears had returned to her and she broke on her last word. Her voice wasn’t steady anymore. “I left all of you... I left you.”
JJ couldn’t stand hearing Ki like this, there’s nothing he hated more than having to let down his guard and get real. But JJ, when she said that, realised that this wasn’t about him. 
“Yeah Ki you did, but fuck that. We know you love us, we know that it was a difficult call! You have to forgive yourself. The reason I came tonight was to let you know that you have the people that care about you Ki.”
He stepped toward her and looked her right in the eye, Ki had never seen someone so determined with compassion before, “Whatever you do Ki - if you wanna go to the kook academy, if you wanna be friends with Sarah Cameron, if you wanna cry about how horribly she treated you, if you wanna listen to your parents and not talk to us, if you wanna leave the cut- we’re never not going to have your back. You’re a pogue. You’re our pogue! And if Sarah Cameron can’t see how kickass you are, she doesn’t deserve you and she never did. You got us Ki, we’re always right here. No matter what.”
And throughout all of that, he hadn’t stopped looking directly at her. She was enamoured to say the least, she couldn’t remember the last time JJ talked about something that real, let alone carry an entire conversation himself. Knowing her words wouldn’t suffice, she hugged him. She smelt the sea salt in his hair and pizza grease on his shirt and it was the epitome of comfort to her. JJ hugged her right back, it meant the world to him that he could make her feel at least a bit better. They stood like that for a while, long and quiet breaths synced, arms entangled in waist and shoulders, hearts rhythmically beating, just enjoying the warmth of the best friend they dearly missed. 
Before they could completely untangle from the other, Ki looked back at JJ, god, how did she get so lucky to have someone like him in her life? The air lightened around them as she looked at him, his eyes regained the mischievous glint they always had. It might’ve been because she was slightly tipsy, or because he was staring so intently at her, but for some reason, it felt right. There was no waiting or thinking, she rested her hands on either side of JJ’s face and kissed him. His lips were chapped and they tasted like beer but she loved it. A rush of adrenaline ran through her, it was new and exciting. 
When JJ processed her soft lips on his, and her hands caressing his face, he pulled back. Along with confusion and surprise, there was something in his eyes that Ki couldn’t recognise. But before she decided on asking him what it was about, he was already kissing her again. 
And this time there seemed to be nothing holding him back. His hands were wrapped around her waist, she was grabbing fistfuls of his hair in reciprocation. They knew that they would never be able to do it again so they just gave in. His hands travelled to the small of her back and her neck and she swore that she had never felt something more intoxicating. 
Ki had forgotten where they even were when they broke for air. They were both just breathing, eyes closed and foreheads touching, it was the closest thing to perfect the either of them had ever felt.
When they opened their eyes and looked back at one and other, they were surprised at how comfortable it felt. How... un-awkward, it oddly felt right. But they knew what the rules were, they knew that when Ki got home, they would never talk about it again, and they were fine with that too.
As they approached her doorstep, JJ couldn’t help himself but ask, “Was that your first-” “Yeah.” “Yeah, mine too.” “What?” Kie thought he was joking, JJ had flirted with every other tourist at the boneyard since they were like ten, “Mine, too.” He repeated. There was an honesty to his response that stopped Ki from asking any further. 
She hugged him again. “Thank you for this. I missed you.” He hugged her right back.
“I missed you too. When you come back to us, more beer will be waiting for you no questions asked, don’t ever doubt it.” With that, he placed a soft kiss on her forehead and left. 
Ki had a small smile playing on her lips; she had never felt lighter in her life. 
158 notes · View notes
Text
I Love You (3/14/2021)
Buddy I don’t even need to summarize this thread, I can just tag it with tropes like it’s a fic, here watch me go: #angst #hurt/comfort #anguished declarations of love #tw depression #tw suicidal ideation
Immediate sequel to this thread but reading it is optional. Basically, it’s nearly impossible to spend very long in Hell without developing a guilt complex and fantasizing about whether it’d be better to stop being; Alastor and Telly @usedhearts open up to each other about theirs.
Frankly it’s a startling display of mutual emotional vulnerability and I’m proud of them both.
Sir Pentious
whenever he came back from that, what did he do
cause it said he went right to telly so 👀
Alastor
Initially? Probably just tracked him down in whatever he was currently doing and went “can I hold you”
Sorta, holding it together by a thread barely
Sir Pentious
telly probably noticed but just 'yes' and let him Hold Him no matter how grimy he was at the time
Alastor
And he’ll be content with that for about three minutes before that one thread starts fraying and he goes “... can you hold me”
Sir Pentious
thats all it takes for him to coil around alastor and hold him Tight
Alastor
Curls up tight in him and sobs on his shoulder.
Sir Pentious
telly just holds him TIGHTER
makes little comforting/soothing sounds
he doesnt know why he's upset but he will be there for him
Alastor
They’re just both gonna be grimy and that’s Fine.
Sir Pentious
so very grimy
they can take baths later
Alastor
When he’s finally capable of attempting coherent speech again the first thing he’s gonna get out is “I never, ever, ever want to leave you.”
Sir Pentious
telly just takes his face in one hand and cradles it so gently and just 'ok, alright, you don't have to.'
give him a kiss
forehead kiss bc he's probably snotty
Alastor
He’s definitely snotty. He’s full on ugly sobbing.
Sir Pentious
oh hes probably not smiling huh
i think thats probably the first time telly sees that
Alastor
NOPE, he lost that sometime while he was hiding in Telly’s shoulder.
First time Telly’s seen him with the mask off
Sir Pentious
god thats got him WORRIED and he just HUGS HIM AGAIN NICE AND TIGHT AND COILED
telly: ive got you. ive got you, im here, it's alright...
Alastor
He’s just gonna keep clinging as hard as he can, he got out One sentence and now he’s sobbing too hard to talk again.
It’s a lot of radio static and feedback noise
Sir Pentious
telly is just going to KEEP HOLDING HIM god himself couldnt pry this snake off this deer and would get bitten and injected with venom for trying
Alastor
He’ll gradually stop sobbing and the shaking will decrease to shivering
Sir Pentious
telly's just going to hold him through it all, pet his hair, massage at the base of his ears, everything he can do to soothe him
Alastor
Mumbles his gratitude and an apology for interrupting telly’s work
Sir Pentious
telly: no no don't apologize. i love you and i want to be here for you. my work will still be there. id much rather know that you're alright and have it be interrupted than you be upset or hurting and you not come to me for fear of interrupting me.
Alastor
Mumble mumble he could have handled it himself
Sir Pentious
telly: i don't _want_ you to have to handle it yourself. i'm here for you, alastor. i want you to know that you can come to me whenever you need me and i'll be here.
Alastor
Tries to say three different things but chokes on them all and just wheezes out another thanks.
Sir Pentious
he just gets a squeeze and a kiss to the nearest him surface
Alastor
He keeps holding on until he can get a small, tired smile fixed back on his face, and then he pulls back to say “Thanks” again.
Sir Pentious
he gets another forehead kiss and then telly gonna lead him to the bathroom and they are taking a BATH they are now both covered in grim AND snot
Alastor
You know, that’s fair. Bath time. Strips down to boxers, climbs in with Telly, and Clings again. ... and sorry about Telly’s clothes, he’ll clean them before the snot fossilizes
Sir Pentious
Those were his dirty work clothes, it's fine, the Eggs will wash them. But it is BATHTIME, and they are both getting a scrubbing. Moreso Telly than Alastor tho.
Alastor
... can Alastor get a scrubbing too
Sir Pentious
Absolutely!
A softer scrubbing than Telly gets
Alastor
He’s going all jelly-eyed again. It’s ok he’s fine.
Sir Pentious
He gets a nice wash cloth and a nice gently scented soap, and a boyfriend to hum to him as he kinda reverently cleans him.
Alastor
He gets self-conscious SO fast, he’s gonna hold his breath and slide under the water. It’s fine he’s fine
Sir Pentious
Telly just smiles and giggles bc that's cute, you're cute Alastor. Probably wraps his tail tip around Alastor's ankle to gently and playfully tug him thru the water.
Alastor
!!! Grabs Telly’s wrists to pull him down into the water.
Sir Pentious
Now they're both underwater!! Gonna tussle with a sea serpent in his natural element, huh, Alastor!! Play time, silly mode ACTIVATED
Alastor
GOOD he’s ready to wrestle. He’s trying not to laugh, he doesn’t want to inhale water.
Sir Pentious
Time to PLAY and WRASSLE!!
Tumbling and splashing and a big grinning snake!!
Alastor
Alastor’s got a surefire way to win this wrestling match! He’s gonna GRAPPLE THE SNAKE COMPLETELY. ... basically he’s just hugging him. Hi.
Sir Pentious
Grapple the snake and the snake grapples back. Now you're wrapped in a tail Alastor, and getting a mermaid kiss.
Alastor
Oh no, what shall he do. This definitely wasn’t his plan. Totally wasn’t. Not at all. Nope.
Sir Pentious
Kiss kiss fall in love, and he's rising up out of the water, because he wants that mouth OPEN for TONGUE.
Alastor
When they get out of the water, Alastor breaks the kiss—sorry, not going for tongue this time
Sir Pentious
Telly blinks and just brief pouting, but holds him close all the same. Kisses cheek instead.
Alastor
“Sorry. Just... tired.” Considering he sobbed about half the liquid out of his body earlier,
Sir Pentious
Wipes the wet hair off his forehead and then kisses it. "That's fine. Come on then, lets get out and dry off. Would you like a snack before bed?"
Alastor
“I need a drink. Not a drink-drink, just a drink. Fluids.”
Sir Pentious
"Of course. I'll get you some water, once we dry off."
Alastor
A nod. He’s still in a quiet mood.
Sir Pentious
Telly gonna carry him out of the bath and set him on a rug. Get towel and start drying him
Alastor gets dried first because Telly Must Care For Him.
Alastor
He puts up a token struggle against this but okay as long as he goes next.
Sir Pentious
He will. Alastor gets handed a Towel and offered his pick of head or tail.
Alastor
Head this time.
Sir Pentious
He Offers Himself on Alastor's drying alter.
Alastor
Alastor Shall Dry This Offering. And while he does he says hesitatingly, “You don’t have to ask if you don’t want to. But you can if you want.” Because it’s been weighing heavily on him as Really Fucking Weird that he just unloaded a hurricane on Telly’s nice jacket and at no point did Telly ask what that was all about
Sir Pentious
He considers it and shrugs a little. "That depends: Do you want to tell me, or would you rather not tonight?"
Alastor
He has to think about it a moment. “I think you should know.”
Sir Pentious
"Alright. Then tell me."
Alastor
Thinks about it; but then just keeps drying.
Sir Pentious
Telly just looks up at him and blinks. "Well?"
Alastor
Stops drying again. “You’re sure?” Listen, this is hard to share,
Sir Pentious
"Yes. If it had you that upset and you say that I _should_ know, then I would like to know."
Alastor
He shouldn’t have said that. He wraps the towel around Telly, hugs him, and sighs. Okay.
Sir Pentious
He's just going to lay there on the rug with Alastor, and the towel wrapped around him. And state with his big ole eyes.
Alastor
No... Not the big ole eyes... That makes this harder. He’s gotta look away. “I... don’t want to be... here.” YEAH ALASTOR GREAT START, SUPER CLEAR, RADIO HOST OF THE YEAR
Sir Pentious
A very confused furrowed brow. "Meaning what?"
Alastor
“In Hell. In—existence.” He swallows hard. “Hell wears you down. It—rubs your soul raw. It sandpapers you off a bit at a time. And I’m—I’m tired.”
Sir Pentious
A soft, concerned look and a hand cupping his face. "Oh, love...I can understand that feeling. I'm...I'm tired too. It is very tiring. Before I met Hel, I'd been close to giving up entirely. And then before I met you, I'd been ready to check myself into that hotel, just to see if it was possible. Something to change the tedium...."
Alastor
“I spend so much of my time going on walks. I don’t have anything else to do but go on walks.” He covers Telly’s hand with his own so he can press into it and shuts his eyes. “Almost every year, I wonder whether this is going to be the year that I decide to go for a walk when the angels come.”
Sir Pentious
And his heart clenches so tightly in his chest. "Don't." The word is soft and unbidden, desperate.
"There have been many a year where I've felt the same...where I thought it would be better to just end it. But I didn't. Mostly out of spite, but that can only get you so far. I like having love to live for better. Or exist for. Neither of us are living." A dry, bitter, short chuckle.
Alastor
His heart skips a beat at the word, so pronounced he flinches at the odd th-thump. Still not used to those. “I won’t. *I never want to leave you.*” He pulls Telly close. “And you’ll stay here?”
Sir Pentious
"I will." It's a promise, a swear, and he can't help but sit up to kiss him, at least once. "Don't leave me and I'll stay here, too."
Alastor
Alastor returns the kiss; it’s not a formal pact with magic and all, but it feels like one. “Then we’ll both stay.” He presses his forehead to Telly’s, eyes still shut. “It’s... heavy, though.”
Sir Pentious
"I know. Damn it, do I _know_. Humans like us, we weren't meant to be eternal. It _fucks_ with us, especially knowing that we've already died. But you have me now. And I have you. And if we share our loads, it won't seem as heavy." He may be crying, just a bit, and luckily only from the face eyes.
Alastor
“Knowing we’ve died—and knowing we aren’t *worth* eternity. I know I’m not. I know Hell is a punishment, but—sometimes it feels so *generous.*”
But he nods, slightly, with their heads still together. “But—I have you and you have me. And good God, am I glad I do.”
Sir Pentious
"I understand. I know exactly what you mean." Sighs and wraps his arms around him.
"I'm glad to have you too. I...I love you." A small kiss.
Alastor
"I love you, too." And it hurts like hellfire to say. It's the thing keeping him chained here, and it's also such a part of the reason why Hell hurts at all.
He presses his face to Telly's shoulder; this time, at least, his crying is quiet.
Sir Pentious
His breath catches and the tears come again, more freely. He can feel the eyes on his tail beginning to leak as well, can't control it in the moment. Telly's arms wrap more tightly around Alastor, and one of his hands moves up to stroke and card through his hair. He squeezes his eyes (on his face) shut again, he shakes with quiet sobs, holding Alastor to him as if everything depended on keeping him close.
Alastor
He holds Telly just as tightly, an arm around his back and an arm around his shoulders. Guilt twists in him at being the one to make Telly cry; but Alastor’s not crying hard, this time around he can support Telly through his sobbing.
Sir Pentious
They're not hard sobs, instead soft little things, hiccups more like, and along with them comes a soft chorus of "Love you, love you, love you." The amount of emotions that are roiling around inside of him, who knows if the crying is sadness, happiness, or something else. But there is an overabundance and he is letting it out.
Alastor
And Alastor will keep supporting him until it’s all out, the same way Telly did earlier. He briefly lowers one hand to Telly’s tail and gently tugs, encouraging him to coil around Alastor if he wants. He can deal with a dozen eyes crying on him.
Sir Pentious
The tail barely needs any encouragement, it is up and coiling in an instant, squeezing Alastor's lower half. Not hard enough to hurt, but definitely very tight. Telly doesn't take too long to calm, the tears stopping and his breathing evening out. Then he's just breathing deeply against Alastor, still holding him tight, but with less desperation.
Alastor
Alastor rubs Telly’s back as the tears slowly stop coming. Once Telly’s breathing has steadied, Alastor murmurs, “How do you feel?”
Sir Pentious
"I'm not sure. I'm happy, but tired, and sad that you felt so tired, too."
Alastor
“I don’t want you to be sad on my behalf.” He sighs quietly. “But if there’s happiness in there too...”
Sir Pentious
"I can't help it, I love you, and knowing that you hurt, it hurts me too. But that's not to say 'don't tell me when you're hurting' because I _want_ to know. So that I can help if I can. Or just hold you, if that's what you need. But I'm happy because you love me, and you're here with me, and we can help each other. And that is what's most important, more than anything." A soft sigh in return, and a gentle kiss to his shoulder.
Alastor
“That’s the worst part of this whole thing, isn’t it? We’ve got to carry each other’s pain on top of our own—and then we feel guilty for paining each other.” Alastor laughs ruefully. “But I’m here for you. For whatever damage control we can do.” He returns the kiss.
Sir Pentious
"It's quite something: you want your love to not hurt, but then your hurt hurts them, and they don't want you to hurt, but their hurt hurts you, and it's just another fucking ouroboros." He laughs, a bit of a hysterical tinge to it. "But I'll endure it. For you."
Alastor
“I’ve always thought there was something beautiful in the image of devouring oneself alive.” There wasn’t anything beautiful in *this,* but maybe he could find it. “I will, too. As long as I give you more happiness than unhappiness.”
Sir Pentious
Telly pulls back just a tad, enough to see Alastor's face. He cups it and kisses him, pressing their foreheads together again. "You already have."
Alastor
“Make sure I keep it up.” He cupped Telly’s face as well, running his thumbs over his cheeks. “We’ve only just gotten started, and there’s a long eternity ahead of us.”
Sir Pentious
"I will. I hold you to that." A bit of a smirk, and he's uncoiling, and grabbing the towel again. "I'm mostly dry but still a little damp. Let's finish up and get some water, _I'm_ thirsty now too."
Alastor
Huff. “*Right.* Of course.” He retrieves the towel he’d wrapped around Telly’s shoulders and helps, taking special care with the tear streaks around his many eyes. “We can try out another one of your herbal teas, see if this’ll be the one I like. I can whip up something or other to go with it.”
Sir Pentious
Telly smiles and finishes drying, before taking Alastor's hand. He kisses it and then wraps it around his arm to start slithering towards the kitchen. "Anything in particular you want to try tonight? Or should I just try and pick something that I think you'll perhaps like?"
Alastor
“Whatever you want. It still all tastes like fruity tea to me.” He laughs self-consciously. “I’ll get there.”
Sir Pentious
"Maybe something with some citrus? For a zest? I have a few mixes like that." They are now in the kitchen and Telly's going to get the kettle on and then dig around for the teas.
Alastor
“Sure, I could use some zest.” He starts rummaging around to see what he can make that goes with something citrusy. He’s got this place pretty well outfitted by now, if he says so himself.
Sir Pentious
"Alright, I have a green tea with orange, clove, and ginger. It's very tasty, has a good bite." He hummed as he got out the clear pot that he'd used before, and two cups.
Alastor
Green tea, what goes with green tea? He’s got no idea what goes with green tea. He can slap together some tea sandwiches that go with orange, clove, and ginger, though. “How does chicken sound?” And perhaps a more important question: “When did you last eat?”
Sir Pentious
Cue him pausing as his brain starts to work, trying to remember. "Ahhh...this morning? Breakfast, yes, I think that was when." Oh look how concentrated he is on pouring the water into the pot he is now.
Alastor
Maybe something a bit more substantial than a rinkydink tea sandwich, then. ���Would you say that tea’s more clove-y or ginger-y?
Sir Pentious
He lifts the dried tea to his mouth to blelele and hums. "More clove-y."
Alastor
“Then let’s make that beef instead of chicken. Compliments it better without having to toss in a dozen other spices—and we don’t want to overpower the tea, do we...” He presumes they don’t want to, anyway. He checks the fridge to see what they’ve got on hand. Watch out, he’s switching into Cooking Mode.
Sir Pentious
Telly loves when he switches into cooking mode. He's just going to move the cups and the pot to the table and then settle in to watch.
Alastor
Okay, keep it simple—he grabbed some roast beef, onions, watercress, mayo, and some odds and ends to mix into the mayo that will *hopefully* compliment the tea, passing each ingredient one by one to his shadow to find a place for on the counter. Alastor swoops by Telly to give him a quick squeezing hug on his way to start prepping sandwiches—maybe a slightly longer hug. Maybe he’ll linger here a moment.
Sir Pentious
Oh! A hug, yes, a hug is good. Get that snake purring like an engine. He's very tempted to coil but he won't, he's getting hungry just watching.
Alastor
Okay, no, no getting emotional. Twice in one day is enough. He’s got fancy mayo to prepare. He lets go and hurries to the counter. “So. What’s... What were you working on earlier?” Don’t mind if his voice is a little rough, it’s fine.
Sir Pentious
"Oh, just more repairs. Installing new parts and making some delicate calibrations that the Eggs can't handle." He's watching Alastor and not even paying attention to the tea, that's gonna seep for a good while.
Alastor
“I ought to take an evening or two to help out with repairs.” He’s talking as much to himself as to Telly. “I keep coming over and *watching,* there’s no reason I can’t pick up a wrench or screwdriver and pitch in.”
Sir Pentious
"I'd love for you to help, I can get instruct you what to do just fine, I know how capable you are." A smile, and then he's re-noticing the tea and pouring a cup. Adds a little honey for sweetness and takes a satisfied sip.
Alastor
He passes over the first sandwich. “If it goes horribly with the tea: I’m sorry, forgive me, I did my best, it’s not my fault.”
Sir Pentious
Telly laughs. "I'm sure it will be fine, Alastor." He takes the sandwich and bites, and then takes a sip of tea, and then makes a very surprised and delighted noise. "Oh, that tastes wonderful."
Alastor
“Good!” He finishes his own, takes a bite—good—and pours some tea for himself to try—well, it still tastes like tea, but like, at least a tea that pairs well with the sandwich. “The good news is I think I’m starting to differentiate the taste of green tea from other teas.”
Sir Pentious
A smile. "Good! I'm glad. Maybe you're acquiring the taste for tea, at least a bit." A wink, and then he's back to eating. He finishes it far, far too fast-- Telly really does just inhale his food when propriety isn't a factor-- and then he's just sipping his tea. His tail slides over to curl around Alastor's calf.
Alastor
Alastor's taken two bites. He pauses before the third. "... Do you want another sandwich?"
Sir Pentious
Oh, shy snake look, and then a little nod. "Yes, please." And his tail retracts to let Alastor move.
Alastor
He waves his shadow over to do it and nudges Telly's tail with his foot. He's staying put.
Sir Pentious
Oh! Good, the tail is curling back around and holding him, and he smiles just so fond and bright. And another sip of tea.
Alastor
Alastor returns the smile—it still looks tired, but it’s just a little warmer when he meets Telly’s gaze. “I’m sorry I threw you off your schedule today.” Such as it was; Alastor was getting the distinct impression that Telly’s schedule was *however much I can get done today in as many hours as I can keep working.* “I’ll help you get back on track. And next time it’s your turn to have an emotional breakdown, all right?”
Sir Pentious
He laughs softly, and reaches over to take Alastor's hand, thumb stroking gently. "Alright, but you have to mop up after." A snicker.
Alastor
Alastor squeezed Telly’s hand. “It’s a deal.”
Sir Pentious
He hums and takes another sip of his tea, not letting go of Alastor's hand. "Is my other sandwich done?"
Alastor
Alastor glances over.
His shadow is just, sorta, standing there, awkwardly, holding a sandwich, watching this tender moment. Heyyy.
Alastor gestures. Go on, put the man’s sandwich down.
Sir Pentious
And he is devouring the sandwich, very happily. A contented snake.
Alastor
Well, for all Alastor’s flaws, at least he can help keep one snake fed—and that’s something, isn’t it? He continues eating his own sandwich. It’s a little awkward with one hand, but right now nothing could make him let go of Telly.
6 notes · View notes
carpsurprise · 4 years
Note
this isn’t really a request but if you want to do it anyway I think it’s fun:^) so we know sunshine boy sam is one of your favorites but can you rate the bachelors and bachelorettes together from most to least favorite and why?
thank u for sending this in!! its always refreshing to do non-imagine/writing stuff for da ol’ noggin!! dlkskd but truly thank u and im gonna put this under a cut and not tag it bc i can foresee there being some issues with this list <3 i do love all of these characters in their own way ofc
1. sam: like u said a given :^) i think sam is dumb and a lot of fun!! i love super happy/caring guys bc i am super bad w/ second guessing myself so!! a guy thats really straight forward and shows how they feel when they feel it is my dream! also the pop punk aesthetic <3 i like that he’s the direct opposite of me!! why would i want to date a dark/brooding guy when im already like that?? i want someone super happy thats gonna radiate that!!
2. haley: haley’s an angel late game! and she’s pretty! im pretty mean myself so i was never driven away from her but was more like damn we’d be powerful together and then she ended up doing a 180 personality wise and i love her even more!! shes so sweet and so helpful during marriage too love her
3. emily: ok emily is like a dream best friend for me!! i love how creative she is and we have a lot of similar interests. she seems like a good mix of the mom girl at a club taking care of all the drunk girls, the girl that u can easily go up to and talk to if u need a partner in class, and the cool older sister. love love love her
4. harvey: sweetheart... angel man. so shy and sweet!! i dont like mean men so him being outright kind and such a good guy is so heartwarming for me!! i feel like he would be respectful at all times and is not a man i’d need to worry about *intentionally* wronging me with intent to hurt <3 
5. elliott: i did theatre in high school and am a creative writing minor. i more wish i was him bc if i could live by the sea and write all day... yes. and speak like someone that would’ve gotten beaten up by a shakespeare character? yes. once again, a man that wouldn’t be mean to me & would make me feel safe
6. maru: also someone i would love as a friend! she’s so kind and always so welcoming my social anxiety would be nonexistent around her <3 i know she’d tell someone my order was wrong for me despite her also being nonconfrontational. seems like a sleepover queen and someone i could go to for anything without being judged love her to death 
7. penny: i also do love penny!! i think she’s def one of the better people in the game what with her aspirations and motivations but!! we r both too shy but i do love reading so i think we would get along there!! she’s v sweet but also her trope is not my fave!! i see a lot of similarities within us 
8. abigail: i do like abigail but i do not see the hype imo. she’s def got more character to her than some of the other women (once again, mr. ape) but she’s just not my type of girl !! i think we’re.... too alike probably. same thing w/ my thing w/ himboish guys.. i try not to surround myself w/ ppl that remind me of myself very often. still lov her tho i promise
9. leah: i feel like leah couldve had more potential in game imo, i dont really think there’s that much to her (thanks mr. ape) but i KNOW she’d beat someone up for me and i love that for both of us. she seems sooo chill and nonjudgemental. she’d buy me food if i couldn’t pay for it at the time </3 i do love her a lot
10. alex: oh boy hot stupid boy but misogynistic comments. granted! high hearts he’s much better but its the getting past that. i like his character at high hearts (also its just funny to headcanon him reacting to other characters) but.. alex i lov u but jesus christ. wouldn’t feel safe around him early game but later on i kno he’d beat up another guy for me <3
11. sebastian: him pushing the farmer (me) away at any chance is a huge turn off for meeeee and i just dont like!! men that are rude. obvi higher hearts hes not anymore but if not for completion sake i wouldnt have gotten to know him. i dont really like edgy guys bc i feel like there’d be more gaslighting and instability. also pelican town only has room for one goth seb stay in the basement </3 sdlkslkd
12. shane: once again mean if i wanted a man to be mean to me i’d walk outside my house. i don’t even reallyyy like his high hearts character (esp w his drinking after marriage) i just lkdlsdk drinking is a big turn off for me (family issues) and i understand why he’s like this i just. it doesn’t excuse it. i’m not his mother i refuse to cater to him bc of his issues. we all have issues.. u cant just treat people bad bc of them!! 
8 notes · View notes
ziracona · 4 years
Note
And I hate to do this- So on that thread, not that he's as bad, why do you think Michael is redeemable? (and also Frank) Especially by his main victim? :? I hope that isn't as bad or as judgmental as I think it sounds... - Sleepy (its like 5am here :3 living up to my name i see)
So, these I gave a short and a long answer for under cut, but forgot I’m on mobile and can’t do that. I can tag it “long post” but uhhh, sorry about this. Anyway, thats why Frank comes in two chunks. I wrote it expecting to be able to use a read more. :’-] also ya fine. And I hope you’re in bed 🤣 now. Okay so. Here’s my reasons:
For Michael, to start, Halloween is complicated af. You have to know what timeline people are talking about, because there are like 8+ and Michael has been written as a wildly different character by wildly different content creators, and I would not feel the same ways towards them all. They’re not the same character. When I talk about Michael, unless I’m going on about a specific other film, I mean either H20 canon, or DbD canon, which are in line with each other when it comes to characterization. (This also includes Halloween’s 1 & 2 in the H20 line, and Halloween 1 at least in DbD). In those timelines, Michael has like at best 2% agency and choice in his own life and what he becomes. That’s why I am sympathetic. I still root for Laurie to nail his ass to the wall of course, and everything he has done to hurt someone isn’t okay just because his life is unfair & awful & out of his control, but I still find him a very tragic character. He was canonically suffering violent psychosis his parents refused him treatment for, isolated with a monster as his doctor & only human contact for 15 years from age 6 on, overdosed on medications that when OD’d worsen psychosis symptoms and can cause permanent brain damage, and stuck like that until escaping briefly when he turned 21.
In Halloween canon, Michael tells his parents he hears voices telling him to do bad things like hurt people, but they tell him he is imagining stuff, and ignore his attempts to get help. The voices say they will be quiet, which is what he desperately wants, if he kills his sister Judith. So he does, at age six. Scientifically speaking, that’s literally too young to really have a complete grasp on death and mortality itself, let alone complex ethics. He immediately goes to his parents after doing the deed, so they can do whatever they need to do. Instead of getting him help, he is sentenced to 15 years in a 1960s American sanitorium (hell), until he turns 21 and can be tried for murder as an adult (fucking ridiculous and unfair?? Tried as an adult is for like, upper teens who commit heinous murders. How tf you justify trying a six year old literally too young to really understand murder as an adult for murdering someone??). They give him to Dr. Sam Loomis, a fucking horrible person, who says he spends 8 years trying to help Michael (a fkn lie), but canonically by only a few months of meeting the kid is thoroughly convinced he is evil, the devil or a demon in human form, faking his psychosis and side effect symptoms (trauma induced mutism from killing his sister, onset of catatonia/motion loss symptoms, etc, all of which are common with his disorder & trauma), desperate to kill again, and an evil mastermind doing the devil’s work, and says so. Spends four hours every day accusing Michael as a six year old child on, of planning to do horrible things and faking his illness and being a demon and not a human, and Loomis, from age 6 to 21, is this kid’s only human contact. And the staff knew it and how wrong and disturbed Loomis was, but did nothing. So from age 6 to 21—barring one or two visits from his mom & Laurie before his dad beat 4 year old Laurie for saying Michael’s, who he hated after Judith’s death, name—until she trauma blocked out having had a brother or sister at all, and then both parents died in a car crash—his only human contact in complete isolation was an adult man who told him for four hours a day he was an evil lying demon faking his symptoms and plotting murder and not a human and promised he would kill Michael and stop him, from childhood on, and that was it. He was never given an understanding of what was medically wrong with him, or that anything was at all. He was threatened and abused and kept overdosed on drugs for 15 years since early childhood, and his only understanding of the world taught in that absolute isolation, was that he was a demon who wanted to get out and kill again. And the violent psychosis, telling him if he killed both sisters, they would go away and leave him in peace with no more constant noise. With no normal understanding of the world or people or life like he was owed ever given to him, no understanding at all of what you were going through or were aside from the promise drilled into your head you were a monster who wanted to kill every day for 15 years while drugged up? Like, I’m a firm believe people are responsible for their own actions, but in a case as extreme as that, honestly, how else was that ever going to even be able to end? You forget, as a child. Who you used to be. That’s beyond grooming even, it’s being grown in a lab for the sole purpose of someday walking out, taking a large kitchen knife, and killing Laurie Strode. And it’s tragic. It’s unfair. Halloween is a tragedy, not a horror film. It didn’t have to be that way. He wanted help. He asked for help. Loomis is directly and pretty much solely responsible for the lives lost in 1978. You know he won’t even call Michael “him”? The only human he contact he had since age six on called him “it.” And no one stopped any of that. And even then. Even then, even with all that. With the drugs, and the lab grown killer, and all of it? Michael is pretty much the single least sadistic slasher killer there /is/.
Everyone he kills in Halloween? He kills fast. It’s actually kind of boring if you’re expecting a scary slasher, because there’s no chase until Laurie. He just appears, runs you through, and you die. Very fast. And if there is any emotion expressed towards the act of killing or aftermath, it’s not pleasure or hate or happiness, it’s curiosity, because literally everything is something he wasn’t allowed to experience growing up and just has no practical experience with yet. And on top of all that, he also just doesn’t kill people he doesn’t have to. He kills one man for clothes, kills Annie to re-do Judith’s murder since it didn’t work the first time and he needs both sisters for the voices to stop, and he kills Bob and Lynda becuase they stumble onto where he is & are a threat to success. (This + Judith 15 years prior is all the deaths in Halloween period, btw). Michael routinely only kills his target, and anyone who is a threat to success. Literally doesn’t even jump out to kill Bob or attack until Bob opens the door to the closet he was hiding in, and he has been seen. Walks past a security guard and lets him go in H20 becuase he doesn’t see him, steals keys from a mom with her 4 year old kid and doesn’t even hurt them because they don’t see him really either, steals a knife from an old lady making a sandwich who is one foot away but looking the other direction, so he lets her go. Even with all the possible stakes against him, really, Michael is like, the least cruel and most sympathetic and merciful version of that lab grown killer possible, which can only be a testament to the person he was initially/still somehow has managed to keep faint traces of alive inside.
As for Laurie finding him redeemable, answer is threefold I guess, and I’ll start with the most important. 1: in Halloween canon, Laurie cares for Michael and is incredibly sad about what he turned into and wishes he could be different (once she remembers who he is). That’s established canon, not a choice of mine. In Halloween 2, she tries to talk him down before shooting him, and he hesitates when she says his name and lowers his weapon for a moment. In H20, she talks about him a lot & even asks her boyfriend (a psychologist) if he thinks something so traumatic can happen to someone that they can never recover, bc even though she hasn’t seen him in 20 years, he’s still on her heart. She hesitates to kill him once she has him helpless in the finale, and when he reaches out for her hand, she almost cries and starts to reach back because it’s what she has truly wanted for so long. 2: Michael & Laurie are siblings, and that’s a very important relationship to me. Obviously, there’s lines where you cross, it’s fkn over, but it is special, and I’m weak for it. They were both cheated of the good family life they could have had, and I like characters I care for getting recovery and rehabilitation, and I would like them to be able to recover and have whatever fragments of the lives they wanted which are still possible. And then 3: Laurie is his victim, but they’re also both victims of Loomis, and the system, and her parents, and if she does /wish/ for him to be okay and things to be like they were, which was canon before me, so she does, then I think them finding happiness and her relief and new hope in regained family and him redemption and rehabilitation through the quite literally only person he has /ever/ known who treated him well or like even a human at all & is still living, that’s so good. It’s sweet, and it makes sense. I like broken people putting the pieces together and finding ways to be okay. None of the shit that happened to either of them was okay, and Michael sure did fucking do it, but it’s about as “it’s complicated” as literally possible, and Laurie wants him to be her brother again, and Michael deserves a chance to experience personhood enough to want anything like that again too, and I think it’s sweet. To be able to find happiness and peace and a new life in that rubble. It shouldn’t be possible, because Halloween is a tragedy that never gets a happy ending, no matter how many timelines they create or versions they tell, but I wish it could have one. It needs one. At least one, among all the fated tragedies for those two cruelly cursed siblings. They both had their lives stolen. Michael by Loomis, and Laurie by Michael. And I want them to find those stolen lives again. And if they can do it together, that’s a very odd and unusual set of circumstances for that kind of thing, but it’s a very complete way to tell the story. He tried to kill her, but if she asked him to stop and he stopped, if he himself chose to change on his own, when it really, really mattered—decided that it was what he wanted more than all the things he was before, and she decided that was enough, and they could both have a future as family? I like that. It’s a happy ending stolen back.
Long Frank Answer, in case you /have/ read ILM & thus short answer did not answer your question: So. Again, for me, I always talk about Frank as in the version of him I myself write, and I wrote ILM before the archives retcon, and also just ignore them because they’re usually dumb and blatantly contradict well established and longstanding canon. Even then, I usually don’t like Frank though—didn’t like him when I started writing ILM. But Frank has very little established canon character. All there is for sure is he was a foster kid that went through some bad stuff, he met Julie and changed his mind about desperately trying to be homed somewhere other than with Clive bc he liked Julie a lot, he met Susie and Joey, they became a gang chilling in Ormond’s abandoned lodge, then tried to rob a store Joey was fired from, were surprised by a cleaner who grabbed Julie, and Frank impulse stabbed him, freaked, and ordered the others to finish it with him and be in it together. Then before they’d even really finished burying the body, they got snagged. That leaves a whole lot of personality and thoughts and motivations and future choices and person wildly undetermined. Writing, sometimes characters just do their own thing completely out of my control, and I have to adapt. Frank chose not to kill Meg at the end of Tenacity, Adrenaline, & Grit, which surprised me, because he’d been nothing but a dipshit asshole bastard till one minute ago, but I knew it was because he recognized what she’d tried to do at great pain to herself because she wouldn’t bow down and die, and he connected/empathized or sympathized on some level. He also couldn’t go through with killing Quentin immediately after being helped by him in Distortion/Iron Maiden. Neither was like, planned. It’s just who the character was. I was frustrated. I did not want to like or feel sympathy for Frank at all. Then in The Lost, Jeff just fkn hijacked the whole plot and added 20 pages not in the outline because he wanted to be kind to Frank & it’s not like I can stop characters when they do whatever they do. And while writing it, I got to know that the version of Frank Morrison in the world I was writing—which is always the version I refer to/think of him as & write now myself—was not somebody past saving. He’s a piece of shit and he’s done fucked up and inexcusable stuff, and he pays for it. In many ways, Frank gets away with a lot over the course of ILM, but it’s always because characters choose on their own to forgive him, not because they or he doesn’t think it was fucked. And Frank suffers—a lot—for his choices, and has to live through appropriate and large amounts of regret and remorse about stuff he did before the end. He gets the chance to make better choices several times, and mostly he doesn’t. He continues to fuck up. But right near the end, he makes a couple good decisions when it’s down to the wire, sees where his bad choices got him and what he has to live with, and then he does live with it. He almost dies, and then ends up falling on Jeff’s mercy, which he knows he doesn’t deserve and doesn’t expect to get, for a last chance to make it, and because Jeff is an ungodly kind and forgiving soul, he makes it.
Frank isn’t a good person, and he does a lot of stuff that isn’t remotely okay or justified or excused, but he /is/ a kid—the upper end of it, but he’s not a full grown adult. He has every reason to believe nothing of himself or others, a fucked up childhood and life which isn’t his fault, and the Entity got all four Legion kids before they’d even had time to process the one and only violent crime they did (which was unplanned), and it is historically running a PHD in psychological warfare vs everyone. Absolutely none of that excuses or justifies him, but it is an explanation for some of it that is not as bad as say, doing that shit for fun or cruelty or hate or what have you, which makes him a bad person, but one with a lot more humanity left than say, Kenneth. Who is at -100 or something. If he’s still got a lot of humanity left, that means he could be redeemed, and he eventually chooses that path for himself and hits the appropriate “I did something horrible. Fuck. It was really bad. I should not have done it.” “I am really sorry I did this. I feel awful. I’m sorry.” “I cant change it, but I can try to do better and make whatever reparations I can.” “I want to be better, and I am going to try.” necessary stages of actually trying to improve. So, I like him. He did a lot of really awful shit that wasn’t okay, but he was never without sympathetic elements. He does love his friends and his girlfriend, he is a good boyfriend to Julie and selfless towards her and his crew (overall anyway—has even risked death for them very willingly, even the one who was fighting with/kinda hated him), will keep his word in deals and has some semblance of both sympathy and honor, feels guilt, is a kid, did not choose this life but was rather catapulted into it and too weak to climb out once he landed in the mud. All of that together makes him someone I feel sympathy towards and find quite redeemable, so long as he will decide he wants that, which, in ILM, he does. If you just meant Frank in general then idk how to answer because there’s not much established Frank period it’s kinda a shell like all original dead by daylight characters, and I have no thoughts on it by itself because it’s not a whole person, and so I really only think of Frank as ILM verse Frank now.
12 notes · View notes
Note
Prompt: Eddie and Richie separate for college and they’re both devastated but won’t admit it and one of them surprises and comes to see the other bc they can’t take it and they need to Congress they’re love
THANKA FOR THE REQUEST
ONLY A FACETIME AWAY
Eddie was so excited to be going to University, he was finally going to be away from his mother. However, there is a down side to that, he would also be away from the losers, from Richie. He doesn't know why but he got really close to Richie this year (as if that was even possible). He thinks that deep down they both knew they suddenly had limited time together and decided to make the best of it. Richie slept over a lot, they cuddled under the covers, it was their little secret, they wouldn't dare talk about outside the confines of Eddie bedroom. They both knew it was a temporary thing, something they shouldn't get attached too but they both did. 
The first week of University was hard on Eddie, he was extremely nervous about being completely alone for the first time, he had a really hard time adjusting to the shared showers in his dorm and his roommate was a very obnoxious fuck boy who brought chicks home almost every night. To say that Eddie was feeling homesick was an understatement. The only thing that made him feel better was the out of the blue, facetime call he got from a certain Trashmouth. 
“Hiya Eds, how New York treating ya?” Richie said as he plopped down on his bed. 
“It’s okay I guess, my roommate is kind of a dick though and I really miss all of you guys. So actually not that okay after all.” Eddie said with a sad grin.
“Aw Spaghetti, i'm sorry to hear that, I miss you too, uhm, all of you.”
“ Thanks, how about you? How’s California?”
“It’s really greats Eds, you would love it here. I’ve already made friends so that’s cool, plus my roommate isn't a shit so everything is pretty darn good.” Richie said with the biggest smile.
“Oh you already made new friends? Thats cool…” Eddie looked away, trying to stop the tears forming in the corners of his eyes.
“Hey Eddie, don't be upset. You’re still my number 1 best friend, nothing is going to change that. These people aren't as cool as you and the losers, they’re just university friends. Temporary replacements until I get my Eds back.” 
“They better be, if not i'm going to fly to California and beat you up.” Eddie said grinning. 
“If that what it takes to make you come to California, then they are definitely better than you. Come beat me up now, please. “ Richie started to laugh at his own joke, while Eddie’s heart started to beat faster.
“You miss me that much Trashmouth? Wow didn't think you would be that clingy.”
“Of course I miss you that much, your my little Eddie spaghetti. How can I live without my favorite carb.”
“Okay Beep Beep Richie. I have to get going. I wanna take a shower before they stalls get crowded. Talk to you soon?”
“I’ll call you tomorrow, promise”
“Good.” Eddie put his phone down and smiled into his pillow, he couldn't wait until tomorrow. 
The boys talked everyday for months, both of them making plans to visit and both knowing it wouldn't happen anytime soon. 
One night Eddie was woken up by a call from Richie, he looked at the time. 4h27 in the morning. What the fuck? He looked over at his roommates bed and was happy to see an empty bed. 
“Hey Richie, what's wrong? Why are you calling me so early?”
“EDS! Look omg its eds, he’s *hiccup* cute, oh eds you’re so cute. Cute!CuteCute!” Richie said as he slurred his words. 
“OH god Richie, are you drunk? Really your drunk calling me right now? I don’t have time for this, i have a big day tomor-”
“Shut up Eddie, i wanna tell you a secret.” Richie said, trying to act serious
“Okay, what’s the secret”
“I miss you, i miss your cuddles, those are the best” Richie started looking in the distance, forgetting he had a phone in his hands. “ I never kissed Eddie, I should have kissed Eddie, his lips look so soft. He's like a little koala, ahhh so cute, little koala bear Eds. ah I love him so-” the phone then feel and seconds later Eddie heard snoring coming from the other end. He hung out as quickly as possible.
What the hell was that supposed to mean? Richie loved him? Wanted to kiss him? No, no its just because he's drunk, right? He called Bev right away.
“Eddie, what the fuck dude, its so fucking early. This better be good”
“Oh trust me it is. Richie just drunk called me and told me he loved me and wanted to kiss me.”
“Holy shit, this is good. What did you say?” Bev said as she sat up in bed, eager to hear the rest.
“ I didn’t say anything, he fell asleep before I could process everything. I probably isn't real right? I mean he was drunk, that doesn't mean anything.” Eddie said biting his thumb.
“Well Eddie, most people say what they really mean when their drunk. I think he meant every word.”
“Fuck this cant be happening!”
“ Why not? Don't you love him back? Bev said confused
“Shit, how do you know that?” Eddie looked worried
“Me and the rest of the losers kinda figured it out, wasn't very hard you both look like lovesick puppies.” 
“Well, that's great. Listen Bev, thanks for listening. I have to think about all of this mess now.”
“Okay Eddie, let me know what happens. Love you”
“Love you too bev” He said as she hung up the phone. 
Eddie didn't sleep the rest of the night. The next morning, he just went about his day and tried to stay focused on his classes. It was no use, the only thing he could think about was Richie. 
Eddie was in his room doing homework he kept looking at the time pass by. Still no call, he thought. Gosh, what if Richie realized what he said and didn’t want to speak to Eddie ever again. He slowly started to panic and ended up sobbing under the covers until he heard his phone buzz next to him. 
Open the door
He saw Richie’s name and thought he was having a hallucination. Why would RIchie text him that? He went to open the door and a tall  mop of curls waited for him. 
“Hiya Eds” Richie said as he combed his fingers through his hair. 
Eddie just leaped forward and  wrapped his hand around the taller boys neck. 
“Omg Richie i can’t believe you're here” Eddie whispered into his ear.
“I couldn't deal with being this far away from my eds. I'm sorry about last night, that not exactly how I wanted to tell you all those things. I hope I didn't scare you or anything, its okay if you don't feel tha-”
He was cut short with lips colliding on his. For a second he was shocked but soon melted into the kiss. It was the most magical feeling in the world, finally being able to kiss his Eds. 
“I love you too, ‘Chee”  Eddie said with the brightest smile on his face.
They ended up staying in bed for the rest of the week, just spending as much time as they could together. Long distance wasn't going to be easy but everything was going to be okay. 
Perm Tag list: @eddiefuckinkaspbrak , @thepurplepanther , @topsyturvytabby, @callmechee
175 notes · View notes
Note
oh my god. Ok so I just scrolled through your blog and my heart hurts because there is so much love and just so much stuff I can relate too and I just ahhh damnnn it I cant even but like can I please have the story of your relationship with this girl your with? please? i'm a hopeless romantic I feel too much I love so hard my own love life is complicated but i know the kind of love you talk about thats exactly how i love the love of my life too so yours is a story I need to hear
ok so. it all started on April 31st, 2018. i reblogged one of those ask games and she sent me an emoji that said “i’m too scared to talk to you but i think you’re great” and i was like do it!!! and she did!!!! she texted me after i had already gone to sleep tho, so i only answered the next day. but then we talked all day. and the next. and the next. and we never ran out of things to talk about and even only knowing her for a few days i already felt comfortable enough with her to talk about anything?? it was wild. since day 1 we’ve had this connection that i’ve never had with anyone else and its my favorite thing in the world. after like a week we already had a bunch of inside jokes, something that i’d never had before, and i was already crushing on her. ok so we became very close friends like immediately, and i mostly ignored my crush on her bc i thought she didn’t like me back and usually i’d get meaningless crushes on everyone at first before i met her. but then this other girl and i started flirting and i realized i didnt like her bc i liked c too much, so i broke things off and kinda went like “oh shit this is real” and decided that i’d just stay friends with c until i eventually couldnt take it anymore and had to tell her abt my feelings bc thats how i am. anyways ok cool meanwhile i made her watch the good place on rabb.it with me which will be relevant later.
ok so fast forward to may 21st or something around that time. its time to sleep bc i have school the next day so we say goodnight, but then i guess she says something or reblogs something and i get sad bc i realize she doesnt like me back. so i make some hashtag sad posts abt yearning and then i realize i told her i was going to sleep and i didnt want her to think i didnt want to talk to her so i text her again and say like “ok i was going to go to sleep but then i got sad abt my crush” and SHE GOES “you have a crush????????” and im there like. what in the hell bc not only did i not try to hide it At All, i constantly posted about it and had an entire tag about her and i thought it was pretty obvious. so anyways i go “yes?? i thoought you knew that?? im literally always posting about it??” and she asks me to talk abt the crush and who it is. i say “just stalk the tag if u want, im going to sleep” then shes like “nO WAIT WHO IS IT” and im like. blatantly ignoring that and my heart is already beating out of my chest but she Really wants to know and then at one point i say “please dont make me answer that” so shE SAYS “you’re making me think that its me” and i say “i dont know what you want me to say” and SHE GOES “I WANT YOU TO SAY THAT ITS ME BC I HAVE A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU” so i just. die. right then and there. also yknow we talk about it and its like after 1 am and im just happier than i’ve ever been. ok so 2 days later she asks me out Officially and its great and shes the cutest gf ever and she made me feel more wanted than i’d ever felt in my entire life. then 6 days later she sends me a big big big text on tumblr and long story short (bc it was kinda personal), she would be deleting her all social media for the summer.
so she was gone. and we had only dated for a week at this point, but we’d known each other for 2 months, and i already loved her. i already knew she was the love of my life. i didnt even try to move on, i’d tell people i didnt wanna move on cuz i knew i was meant to love her. i had another blog like this that i used to talk about how much i loved and missed her (so like. exactly like this). i literally reasoned with myself that like. that happened because before i met her i was in a really bad place after a terrible relationship and i was almost giving up on finding someone who actually made me feel loved bc i thought it would never happened, so i was like “ok so i was in a really bad place, so the universe brought my soulmate a little early just for a while so that i would know i had to hold on, and when its actually time for us to be together, it will bring us to each other once again” like i actually told myself that, in those words. and yknow what? i wasnt even wrong. on july 15th she texted me from an empty tumblr with her old url and at first i literally couldnt believe it but we talked for hours and hours and i asked her what happened bc i thought she was disconnecting for the summer and she said “i was. i am. i just couldnt not talk to you anymore” and she said that she thought about me every single day, and i told her i missed her and she said she didnt text sooner bc she thought i’d be angry at her and ofc i wouldnt, i could never be angry at her and besides, she was just taking care of herself and i said i dont think i could be anything less than head over heels for for, and she said she felt the same way, but wasnt ready to be more than friends yet. but that had always been more than enough for me. just having her in my life would always be more than enough for me. so we stayed friends.
then, on august 9th i got this ask.
Tumblr media
and she saw it after i said i was gonna go to bed (bc again, i had school the next day) and she texted me a whole thing about how that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said about her and that i should be asleep but she had to get it out of her chest and that her anxiety made it hard for her to show how much i meant to her so she was sorry if i didnt know and this would probably make no sense but she was tired of keeping it to herself bc shes the luckiest person alive for having met me and that it was gonna be so hard because shes so difficult (shes not) and her anxiety is difficult but that she literally spent every night thinking about me and of buying plane tickets to come see me so that she could be with me. then she was like “im sorry if this is uncomfortable to you and you can just ignore it but i think im in love with you and this is over text and not romantic at all (it was the most romantic night of my life) but you’re asleep (i wasnt) and we arent together but i want to be one day” and until this i was Trying to fall asleep and then i checked my phone that kept RINGING and died a thousand times over and started to answer and she sent other texts saying “i’ve never felt this way about anyone before i’m so in love with you its fucking ridiculous and this is gonna be so complicated but fuck i want this so bad / i’m sorry it took me so long / would you move to new york with me?” and i was This Close to literally fucking exploding like. how the hell was this happening how was it not a DREAM. so we talked and i obviously said i loved her too and eventually she asked me out and thats still probably the best night of my life. other highlights: “i’ve loved you way before august 9th so jot that down” and “off topic but i love you / you’re honestly my other half” and, after i said “you cant make me laugh its 2am”, she answered “i’m going to make you laugh for the rest of your life so help me god” and thats my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me probably and so far she’s kept her word.
anyways we got back together and then she told me that she never even told her friends she broke up with me??? bc that way she could keep pretending we were still together???? literally like sjdksndk imagine being this loved. i dont have to. anyways she wrote poems abt me sometimes and her christmas gift for me was gonna be a book with all her poems and she called it “what we owe to each other” because of the good place (remember how i said it’d be relevant later? its later) bc like she said that when we were watching tgp together on rabb.it thats when she realized that she Really Truly liked me like For Real. and the inscription on the book was going to be “to the girl i love / and what i owe her” and. yall. i cry. anyways one of the poems had a huge impact on us. heres the story:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
and she got them but we broke up before she got to mail them to me. what happened was she had some mental health problems and she said she couldnt give me what i needed at the time but knew i’d still give her my all bc thats just how i am and she thought it wouldnt be fair so she broke things off to work on her mental health. she said she would need some time before we could be friends. the last thing we said was that we loved each other. this was in like november 2018, and we didnt talk for months. i actually tried to move on this time after a while, but it didnt take. and then i gave up for good. havent tried since. but anyways, then, on march 11th, 2019, i had my first day of college back in my home country, and we have this “pranks”/games that seniors get to do to the freshmen, and one of them required eggs, and they asked us to paint them, so i panted mine as iron man bc it was easy, but c LOVES iron man. like. LOVES. like in a Whole New Level of loving. once when we were dating she said she loved me more than tony stark and i was like. shook. like she tattooed “T.S” on her ankle after him. u get the point. she loves him very much, its adorable and endearing and i love it. anyways. so i sent her a picture of it saying like “you dont have to answer this but i made this for my university and i thought you would like it” and she answered and IMMEDIATELY something clicked and we talked and talked and talked and it was never weird or awkward or uncomfortable. it never is with her. its incredible, i cant explain it. i Know shes my soulmate like thats the ONLY possible explanation for this kind of connection. its unreal. anyways. we became friends again! all was well.
then one beautiful night she drunk texts me sndjkajs she sends me so many texts and says it sucks that we live so far away and that she saw my posts (in this particular case, one that said something about like. when she talked about love now, was it about someone else?) and she said that it wasnt. and then she went to sleep and i only saw the texts when i woke up and i was DYING bc we had a 4 hour difference and it’d take a while for her to wake up. when she did, we talked and she said she wasnt over me and was scared she might never be, and even though we were still gonna stay friends, it was nice to know that she still loved me. ok so fast forward a bit more and i was starting to wonder if she’d moved on again, when she finds out her best friend had a crush on her, and that conversation ends up with her saying “it was 100% platonic for me / sorry if thats weird i just wanted you to know that” and it was NOT weird it was GREAT NEWS bc i was Hella jealous of her best friend and at first i wondered if they were dating and anyways the fact that she wanted me to know that was a pretty good hint that she still had feelings for me. ngl im still somewhat jealous of h (c’s best friend), but thats just bc im an insecure lil bitch and also bc they get to go out and do stuff together that i cant do with c bc of the distance, yknow? but anyways. then she went on a graduation trip in mid to the end of june and she bought me a magnet. just. out of nowhere. i cannot stress enough how Incredibly unexpected this was. so much so that i actually convinced myself that it meant she was over me????? literally. what the fuck. anyways we named him together and coincidentally (or bc of soulmate powers. who knows) we both had the same favorite names. i still love that.
okay so then we go to july 29th, 2019. first of all theres one of my favorite interactions Ever which was like after i was venting about something and i was thanking her and i said “you’re always here for me” to which she answered “nowhere else i’d rather be” and i still think thats peak romance and i will take no criticism on this. anyways so then she sent me a poem that she wrote based on a song i’d sent her (the song i called “heaven is a place” and its the BIGGEST mood for being in love and i sent it to her bc it was how i felt about her so her writing a poem about it?? literally the best thing ever. love it) anyways it was a beautiful poem and i cried and got very emotional and kinda went too far in my compliments (aka being very obvious about my romantic feelings) and then i was like oh no sorry if i made u uncomfortable and she was like. “you have NEVER. EVER EVER EVER EVER made me uncomfortable” “you’re the only person on planet earth i am comfortably myself around” and “there’s nothing you could ever say that i wouldn’t wanna hear” and anyways it was just very good and romantic conversation even tho we were just cough cough platonic hashtag gal pals hashtag no homo ✌️ and then she was like ok wait. i need to talk to u abt something. and in short she said she was waiting for us and i was like well what are you waiting for exactly? and she was like idk?? for us to accidentally bump into each other in new york in a few years?? WHICH WAS LITERALLY WHAT I’D DAYDREAM ABOUT BACK IN JUNE 2018 BEFORE SHE CAME BACK OKAY so anyways we had a Great conversation and said i love you about a thousand times each and she decided she was gonna buy tickets to come see me. and then she dID like TWO DAYS LATER. lichrally. queen of impulsivity but in the best way possible.
—————
ok quick edit here cuz i forgot to say that when i found out she was coming i asked for my mom’s help to make a necklace pendant for her from scratch. my mom works with prosthetics so she has the material to make jewelry and back when c and i were dating in 2018 i had made this lil design for a necklace that had the moon and the ocean (bc duh) and i was gonna give it to her for valentines day in 2019 but we broke up before that so i didnt get the chance, but when i found out i was meeting her i knew i had to. so i made the necklace in wax, like this:
Tumblr media
and my mom took it to her work and heated it up to melt it and keep the shape of it to fill with silver, and this was the result:
Tumblr media
i gave it to her when she got here and she wore it while she was here and it made me so happy. ok edit over
—————
ok so we kept being like couple-y but not officially in a relationship bc we didnt want to make her anxiety worse. also at one point she was like “so about the ‘i love you more than the moon/ocean’ thing, since we BOTH love BOTH of the moon AND the ocean, i think its only Fair if we update our love declarations to ‘i love you more than the mocean’ bc its mix of both but thats not a word, buT its pronounced exactly like ‘motion’. therefore we should both start saying ‘i love you more than the motion’”. so now we have both the wonderful, romantic, original version, and the NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL DO U HEAR ME C??? version :) and after this day she always started with the WORST!!!!!! version, and i always started with the Only Valid Version, but we’d still answer each other’s ofc because. well. thats love i gues?? it sorta goes like this though: her: i love you more than the motion / me: i hate u / me: i literally hate u so much / me: i Also love you more than the motion
but anyways she was coming to visit me but the plane ticket wasnt for my home country it was for where i was going to university at (a new university, i was starting over) and when i first got here on this campus, i didnt have a working phone number for this country, and i wouldnt be able to access the wifi for 3 days, so i had no way of talking to her. it was TERRIBLE and i missed her more than anything in my LIFE but when i got wifi (after CRYING to the people here bc theyre the most unorganized uni ever and i was already very overwhelmed and stressed) i immediately called her and she’d sent me over 100 text messages dkfjssjks it was amazing, there were two (2) videos of her singing (which is like. objectively the best thing in the world, and the song was rlly romantic and i love it sm when she showed it to me for the first time she said it made her think abt me), a poem, AND a HUGE text with “i love you” written like. a THOUSAND TIMES. seriously i have a gif of it opening and scrolling bc it was so long that the text wouldnt show up directly on the chat screen and u have to click on it to see the rest. i’d never felt more loved in my entire life by anyone ever. anyways so then it came the day for her to get here and i had to wake up at 5 am to go get her at the airport and the uber was like $40 but who CARES it was the best day of my LIFE and i got there 20 minutes earlier bUT GUESS WHAT SO DID SHE (hashtag just soulmate things) then we facetimed the entire time while she was walking through the airport and getting her luggage and then she hung up to walk to the door where i was and we hugged for like 5 minutes and we were totally in people’s way and also almost fell but it was the best thing in the world and i never should’ve let her go. but, we had to go home, so i did. and we spent 4 days together and im not gonna go into details bc this is already too long but u can always send me another ask about her visit if ur not a coward. also i bought her a hoodie from my uni and whenever she wears it i just. die. in short, those days were the happiest i’ve ever been. this campus res had never felt like home before that friday and it hasnt again since that monday, but i swear to god, during those 4 days, this was the only place i could possibly belong.
anyways then she left and i cried for the entire uber ride home and then i cried all day. lmao. also when she was here she gave me the poetry book, the magnet, and the bracelet. still wear the bracelet every single day and i love it more than anything. but then personal stuff happened and we kinda stopped being couple-y again and we’re just friends now but before new years i asked her if she still loved me and she said yes and she said she’d tell me if it changed so ✌️✌️ im assuming it hasnt. even tho my brain is a bitch and everyday its like. today. today is the day. this is when its gonna happen. buT yknow we’ve spent months before without even talking to each other and we got through that still in love, so i mostly ignore it. and tbh i know that actually like, even if we grow apart now (god forbid, but still) we’ll find our way back to each other eventually. like, i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: nothing, not even the universe itself, can convince me that shes not my soulmate. and even if it turns out i’m not hers, loving her is still the greatest honor i can think of.
another edit: also i started drawing recently and the first person i’ve ever finished drawing was her and also (surprise surprise @c since you’re already seeing all my feelings anyway) bc of my second drawing i almost missed the deadline for one of my midterms (which was a take-home test) bc instead of writing it i spent the entire day before the deadline finishing the drawing which was a secret valentines day gift (secret as in she didnt know it was supposed to be a gift, she thought it was just a drawing inspired by a quote that she loves) and i finished at 2 am but shes 3 hours behind so for her it was still 11 pm which MEANS it was still valentines day so it still counts, i win, lesbian rights!
2 notes · View notes
jichew · 6 years
Text
college!hyunsuk au♡part two
a/n: the long awaited part two is here!! thank you all again for the love on part one :((( idk how to make links so you if you haven’t read that, just go through my ygtb imagine tag to find that. I thought this was much needed considering all the hate suk is getting lately :/ feel free to leave any questions/asks/comments in my inbox! mwah ♡ 
so it’s been a while since the night of the party
first things first, mina and gon are a couple nowヽ(*^ω^*)ノ
you really never thought you could see any of your friends in a romantic relationship but these two go so well together uwu
they’re kind of like the resident mom and dad couple
and because of that, your two friend groups have officially been adopted by them!!
and at first you were lowkey scared of his friends ,,, esp seunghun
but when you found out he’s actually just a puppy in a buff man’s body , shit got LIT
idk what i meant by lit, it just seemed to fit
anyway
so you guys basically hang out every day, usually congregating at the boy’s place bc they’re sophomores and have their own apartment
and u and hyunsuk are basically besties now
now,,, you can’t deny you were very attracted to him before
lol don’t tell anyone but u still kinda are(๑>◡<๑)
but you just assumed it was surface level and decided he was better as a best friend anyway
so basically you guys found out you share a bunch of the same classes
and now you guys walk to all ur classes together!!!
and suk brings u iced coffee in the morning
and walks you back to your dorm at night
and sometimes you guys hold hands
╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
you’re also his calculus tutor now
and in return he buys you food!!
usually that would be a pretty good tradeoff but tutoring hyunsuk is so,,,hard
“so can you complete this problem using integration by parts?”
“if you give me a kiss on the cheek, yes”
(O_O)
this man is really after your heart isn’t he
hyunsuk flirting with you is kind of a common occurence
“fuck you suk”
“fuck me yourself you coward”
(´⊙ω⊙`)
anyway,,,,,
usually it’s just harmless pickup lines
but sometimes,,,, you’ll be doing homework or listening to lecture, and he’ll just stare at you
“what r u looking at”
“how pretty you look today”
HOW DARE HE
\\\٩(๑`^´๑)۶////
and you can’t help how your heart flutters when that happens
but also, you have to force yourself to snap out of it bc this is hyunsuk we’re talking about :///
he’s just so ,,, out of your league
not only that, but you were sure he had this flirty nature around everyone
and even if he did magically end up liking you, you didn’t want to risk losing him as a friend
(◞‸◟)
sad hours: activated
so it’s been a few weeks and the guys decided to throw a party before everyone left for thanksgiving break
obviously the whole gang™ is invited
tonight,,, you are NOT drinking
bc you are a responsible individual who has decided to be the designated driver for the night
\\\\٩( 'ω' )و ////
but some other people have different plans
right as you guys walk in the door, your eyes are immediately drawn to hyunsuk
perhaps it’s because he looks so completely ethereal with the top few buttons of his dress shirt undone, smile glowing under the dim lights of the living room
or perhaps its because he’s taking shots like there’s no tomorrow
hhnnggggg
and your inner mom is just like
“HYUNSUK NO”
“HYUNSUK YES”
and then he downs his fifth shot of the night
so now you’re hyunsuk’s babysitter for the night
y/n, you really outdid yourself
so after maybe two hours of smacking solo cups out of suk’s hand and watching him try to wall twerk to eyes noes lips,,,
he’s FINALLY gotten tired
\( ˆoˆ )/
so now you guys are just chilling in the living room
most people have left so its just the og gang
and hyunsuk’s just laying on the sofa with his head in your lap
(^-^)
and normally you would find that cute, but you’re still kind of mad at him for getting so drunk
\\\٩(๑`^´๑)۶////
but you can’t help yourself from playing with his hair bc you’re whipped lol
anyway,,,you’re kind of zoned out of the conversation and you’re pretty sure hyunsuk is falling asleep
until you feel his hand grab yours while it’s still in his hair
which kind of brings u back to reality
and u look down at suk
and he’s just looking up at you with his eyes all crinkly and a goofy smile on his face
and he’s just like
“y/n you’re so pretty” (´∀`)
and you’re kinda like (^.^) but also ur like
“lol suk ur drunk”
and then he’s like
“NO”
and suddenly he’s sitting up and hugging you super tight, his face buried into your chest
at first your like (o_o)
because this is hyunsuk and his face is literally in your boobs hhngg
finally you snap out of it and you’re like
“THATS IT, IM TAKING YOU TO BED”
and suddenly everyone’s just looking at you two like
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
and you’re like
(・・?)
and you realize hyunsuk still has his face in your boobs
and suddenly he properly sits up
and brings his face really close to yours
and you’re just frozen like (°_°)
but you can’t help but notice how soft his lips look right now
and the way he’s staring at you, you just know he knows the effect he has on you
and you’re wondering how socially acceptable it would be if you just closed the distance with your lips
and you suddenly realize how frantically your heart is beating
“you want to take me to bed?” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
this HOE
FINALLY u snap out of it
“t-that’s not what i meanthhbbdjnj”
and you’re just stumbling over ur words
and suk has that drunk dopey smile on his face again
and everyone’s still looking at u two like ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
and you just take his hand and drag his short ass up the stairs and make him lay in his bed
“i love a woman who’s domineering in the bedroom” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
“shut the FUCK up” (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾
but once suk is finally tucked in his bed
he calms down
and as ur about to leave
he grabs ur wrist quickly
and u weren’t expecting it so you kind of stumble on to him
and you guys are really close in proximity again
and he whispers in a soft voice
“y/n, you know i like you right?”
you can’t lie that your heart stutters for a second
but you smell the alcohol in his breath
so you heave a sigh
and gently kiss his forehead
“sweet dreams hyunsuk”
and you leave the room
uhhh so like fast forward two days to the monday after the party
you,,,, have kinda been ignoring everyone
ESPECIALLY hyunsuk
you’re just so
hnbbggggghhhhhdhhdhbdh
\\\٩(๑`^´๑)۶////
so here’s the thing
you like hyunsuk
you KNOW you like hyunsuk
you’ve basically admitted it to yourself that your head over heels for him
and you KNOW he doesn’t feel the same for you
but the way he acted with at the party the other day made you think different
and you’re so CONFLICTED
i mean he was drunk????
if he actually liked you, wouldn’t he act that way when he WASN’T drunk?
and it just makes you sad more than anything
so you stay in your dorm all day
and you ignore suk’s calls
because he’s been calling you since the next morning
but you can’t bring yourself to hear his voice, let alone TALK to him
and you know there’s no way he can get to you bc you’re in your dorm all day
until you hear a knock on your door
and you look through the peephole and see mina
and you’re debating opening the door or not bc you really look and feel a mess and you’re just sad and embarrassed
“I KNOW YOU’RE THERE OPEN THE DOOR OR I’ll KICK IT DOWN MYSELF”
and you lowkey believe her
so you open the door
and you look at her
and she looks at you
and then you just start SOBBING
as if you weren’t already a mess, you’re even MORE of a mess now
so mina has closed the door and guided you to your bed
and she’s just letting you cry, patting your back and whispering comforting words
and when you finally calm down
you look up at her, tear tracks marking your cheeks, your nose red and runny
“mina, i really like him” (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥`)
“i know”
...and you’re sobbing again
and then when you calm down again you’re like
“i don’t even know why i like him!! like sure he’s good looking and sure he has great fashion sense and sure he’s nice and cares about me and takes care of me and ...”
...surprise! you’re sobbing again
and mina just lets it happen
she knows you’re going through it
and when you’re finally out of tears
she looks at you and she’s like
“it’s ok to like him. it’s ok to like a guy. so what if he may not like you back? not that that’s true, but you never know until you try! and if he doesn’t, so what? you know your worth! and you are worth so much! don’t let a guy stop you from living your life, because you are so much more than that.”
mina for president 2020
and you look up at her
(´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥`)
you’re so lucky to have her as a friend hhnng
so you’re feeling better now
and you skipped your classes on monday, because you were still getting it together
and you didn’t have any classes with suk on tuesday
and you think he knows you just need your space
bc he’s stopped calling you
but he’s still texting you
and you may have checked them and you may have squealed bc he called you babe
anyway
it’s wednesday
you know what that means
it has come full circle... the dreaded 9 am chem lecture
so you leave your dorm extra early
because you know you need the time
and you get to your class at 8:50
and right as you’re about to enter the building, you feel a hand grab your wrist
and by now, you know who it is
so you let him lead you a little away from the building where no one was
and he finally turns around and looks at you
and you can’t find it in yourself to look him in the eye
so you just look down at his hand that is still holding onto yours
and you gently pry his fingers from around your wrist
and you let your arms rest at your sides
“y/n....why have you been ignoring me”
you already feel tears coming on
but you bring your hands together in front of you, still staring at the ground
“it was only three days” you mumble
and he’s quiet for a sec
“i missed you”
lol ur rlly whipped and you know it
you finally look up at him
and he just has the most devastated look on his face
and you can’t tell if it’s the glare from the sun, but his eyes look watery
and he his lips are pouted
and he just looks like a kicked puppy
and everything in you is just SCREAMING to hug him and apologize and tell him everything will be ok
but,,,,you have to do this ... for yourself and mina \\\٩(๑`^´๑)۶////
so you take a deep breath and look him in the eye
it takes a while for you to formulate words but
“why do you always flirt with me like that?”
“wha-“
“when you know i like you, why would you play with my feelings like that? i thought you had some respect for me, but it’s so degrading when you lead me on just to reject me later! this isn’t some game suk...”
you finally take some time to breathe and take a look at him
and his face is just blank
and his mouth is kind of open
and he’s staring at you ~like that~
and you’re about to snap at him again
but then he opens his mouth to say something
“...you like me?”
you’re kinda confused
“obviously, you know this already???”
he just stares at you for a little longer
and he kind of looks like he’s about to cry again
“...no i didn’t”
uhhh huh
now you’re the one who’s speechless
he takes a little step closer to you
your heart is starting to beat really fast again
“you know i only every flirt with you right....and it’s not because i think it’s funny, well i mean it is kinda funny -“
you: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
suk: ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ
“anyway.... i only ever flirt with you... because i like you too”
he kind of whispered the last part
but you heard it
and you’re looking at the ground but you can’t help the smile growing on your face
so you just close the gap and hug him
and he’s kind of unresponsive at first
but he lets his arms wrap around your waist and pull you closer to him, his head falling into your hair
and you can’t see his face but you know he’s smiling bc u are too
you lean back a bit to look at him
and you notice the way his eyes keep flickering between your eyes and lips
and as much as you would love to kiss his pouty lips, you have to put ur foot down
“NOT IN THIS HOUSEHOLD WE ARE LATE FOR CHEM LECTURE”
and that’s the beginning of a beautiful relationship
・:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+
228 notes · View notes