#what will the temperature in car for dogs chart be?

[trenchcoatsbi]

this is 🦁🏔️ anon, answering the ask game!! hopefully it doesn't get too long

Share your memories!

Where we live now, there isn't any snow or a big temperature change during the winter, but in my source it SNOWED. SO MUCH. And I remember hitching car rides home from the station with some of my coworkers/partners and hopping in the back seat to turn on the heater... And I miss everyone from the station. No one was perfect and we all kinda got caught up in some crappy stuff but I miss the friendships I had. Also I think a lot of us miss snow in general. - raoir

Is there any foods from your source that you can't have anymore/miss? (Big Q asks for your favourite ice cream flavors)

nope! I think for most of us, everything we liked in source is here. also I LOVE chocolate peanut butter ice cream. dick likes vanilla or pecan stuff, luke likes chocolate, redd likes birthday cake, and ronan likes peanut butter (he is so dog-coded /j) - fritz

What was/is your favorite thing about Minecraft? (If youre from an MC-based source.)

none of us are sourced from minecraft stuff but i really like the farming. like i LOVE farming. start up a server with us on it and there will be a huge wheat farm in no time. i think that ties back to how in both my sources i was raised on a farm??? i'm only making that connection now lmao - macdon

Who do you miss the most?

I miss my partners. Things got really bad in source, and I lost one of them and never got to apologize to the other. I wish I could see them again and make everything right. - raoir

i miss my girlfreind,,,,, so much,,, where is she /silly - redd

i miss my kids!!! my little troublemakers !! i need someone (NOT my husband) to cringe at my dad jokes /j - ro

What’s the best thing about being kin/an alter for you?

i love that we're like a big family. granted that doesn't mean we don't get on each other's nerves a lot lmao. but it's nice to never be alone. there's almost always someone looking over your shoulder or idly chatting with you, and it's really comforting. - m

same as above. also i love buying things i know someone else will like and saving it for them. (our etsy favourite list is a mess LMAO) - ronan

If you could swap your kins/who you’re based off, would you?

uhhhh technically i would. but i would switch my source to like. the version of me that actually ended up introjecting? if that makes sense? because Canon Me is a NIGHTMARE. he's a creep. but i literally only have two things in common with the guy. i look like him and we both played baseball in college. lmao. (also i literally just realized that i was falling back on. old habits in those other asks i sent. source's name is luc. i tried changing my name to luke. aaaugh. fuk /silly) - luke

What’s your favorite music? Additionally, do any songs help you get into shift/front?

completely breezing past the first question sorry fdhgkldfj. gonna dump some of our front trigger songs here (i'm always around so this isn't applicable to me lmao). come get some free music recs /silly - m

TC: BUTCHER VANITY - pann ver. (by pann) (TW: gore/cannibalism)

Dick: Inertia (by AJR) (both the normal and acoustic versions!)

Fion: Lavender Forever (by Jake Wesley Rogers)

Redd: Transylvania Mania (from Young Frankenstein)

Fritz: HEAVEN SAYS. (by chart)

Galloway: Sleeping in the Kitchen (by Madilyn Mei & Addison Grace)

Luke: Literal Monster (from Nerdy Prudes Must Die)

Macdon: Eat Your Young (by Hozier)

Raoir: 25 or 6 to 4 (by Chicago)

Ro: Shivers (by Ed Sheeran)

Ronan: it boy (by bbno$)

Tommy: The Lotto (by Ingrid Michaelson & AJR)

WOW that was a lot lmao. uhhhh (youtuber voice) if you reached the end, drink some water, stay hydrated, take a stretch break if you can (writing this from our shrimp artist position,,, oough. spine.)

also we saw people talking about pokemon and our favourite pokemon is skarmory!! it used to be another pokemon but then we did a shiny hunt for skarmory in ORAS and it took like 600+ encounters. we named it macduff after the shakespeare guy lmao.

- 🦁🏔️ [several of us lmao]

EATS UP THE MUSIC REQS

also skarmory! i dont see much skarmory love around, thats awesome! they suit you guys :3 /pos

also.... snrk..... the name dick... /T /SILLY

[har-rison-s]

coffee stains: 2

request: Happy New Year! I've had a Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield) x Female Reader imagine that's been running around my brain for a while (now with the addition of a coffee shop) and I was hoping you could write it: In another universe, Reader is bitten by a radioactive spider and becomes Spider-Woman. On the days that she's not out patrolling the city, she and her boyfriend Peter (who's normal) visit her favorite coffee shop, whether it be the holidays or to talk about personal matters.

a/n: oh hi! chapter two already. i hope you guys liked that little filler of an intro / chapter one, i hope it was up to the anon’s standards!!! so here’s a next chapter, a longer and fuller one. quite eventful and funny, this one, i loved writing it. something quite unexplored – a female reader getting her powers. for me, at least, and it’s so interesting to take in all the aspects of spider-man’s powers, analyse them, describe them, because in the movies you just see them, they don’t exactly accentuate how peter feels all these weird things, yk. so happy reading! love you all. take care

my paypal (would be much appreciated since i’m saving up for uni next year :))

mcu masterlist

read my other peter parker writings here

read part one of this series here

before you read: mentions of spider-bites, of spiders; mcdonald's ?? not exactly warnings just mentions ig :D

word count: 3.1k

She knew it was illegal. She knew she could face potential jail time for it. What scared her more would be the embarrassment and shame she’d feel when she’d tell her mom that she’d done it, honestly, but all of that was scratched because firstly, no one caught her—except maybe agitated Gwen—and secondly, she was starting to feel like she was dying.

Her body temperature was rapidly changing from high to low, her five senses were more than active, they were extra active, like dialled to a hundred on some chart. And she couldn’t unglue her fingers from her phone. Quite literally.

She managed to send Peter a text “meet me at the coffeeeeeeeeeee house??? soon as you cannnnnnn and bring gloves maybe ??????” that she knew would seem weird and—knowing him—funny, but she was having an emergency. On her way from Oscorp tower to Sir Presso’s, Y/N spotted a McDonald’s, and at the thought and memory of the food there was overcome by extreme hunger. She didn’t know where that hunger came from, what caused it, and why it was there. She didn’t like the feeling of it, but it gave her hunger in such an intense form that made her feel like she’d die if she didn’t eat in the next few minutes.

So Y/N ordered a whole bag of her favourites off the menu—inwardly crying about the damage it did to her bank account—and left quickly for the coffee shop to avoid causing any trouble to the staff or visitors of McDonald’s – though now, one of her hands was stuck to her phone, and the other – to the paper bag. She mannouvred through the doors with her feet, elbows and shoulders, so she wouldn’t touch anything and potentially break it. What if she couldn’t let go of the door knob?

Why was this happening to her? She couldn’t possibly think of a disease that had these symptoms. Only death came to mind, as morbid and absurd as it were. With all these weird feelings also came the loudness of everything. Now, Y/N well knew how loud New York was, she knew it by heart and could never forget it. But this was on another level… cars driving all at once, people talking and yelling and laughing all at once, doors opening and closing, cats and dogs barking and meowing, birds singing and biting on some left bread. She even thought she could hear a noise that resembled a bug walking across a cement road. How? Why? Where? Where was the bug?

Y/N plopped down into her and Peter’s favourite spot—a table surrounded by two high-back sofas, like in diners or fancy restaurants, in the farthest corner from the entrance of the coffee shop. They liked to be tucked away in their own little world in public spaces. She sighed a big sigh of relief and closed her eyes for just a second, laying sprawled across the sofa in an awkward position. She felt exhausted and most energised at the same time, and it wasn’t exactly a pleasant feeling.

“What will you be having today?” The usual barista’s voice startled her out of her slight daze, and Y/N jumped in her seat. She opened her eyes to see Roberto staring down at her, that apron around him as usual, and a smile plastered across his face. “Oh, sorry—”

“You didn’t scare me,” she assured him, “oh, sorry I’m here with this—” she lifted the McDonald’s bag up in the air and uttered a nervous chuckle, “I’m meeting Peter—he should be here any minute—and I was just—” running away from Oscorp tower and that sterile room full of spiders and their webs which probably just infected me with their venom or some kind of virus? Y/N’s lips broke into a nervous smile to Roberto, “I was running late and got hungry on the way.” She finalised. Roberto nodded with a smile.

“Can’t be running late if you’re here before him,” Roberto told her, and Y/N could agree, so she nodded and laughed again, “Cappuccino or Latte today?” He inquired again. Y/N thought a moment.

“You know, I’m plenty energised,” she said, “a hot chocolate will do. Two, actually. Peter’s.” She corrected herself before he moved to leave. “And could I have a piece of your veeeeery delicious cheesecake?” She asked, and Roberto nodded. “And uh—” she chuckled as she sat up straighter in her seat, “weird question, but, um,” she scratched her head with her wrist in an awkward manner, “do you have any gloves? Like any type of gloves—medical or any other ones?” She didn’t really want to eat her burgers and fries and nuggets with whatever gloves Peter could be bringing, and she knew that baristas and people working with pastries and food, anyway, had gloves somewhere or other. Like medical gloves.

“Gloves? You mean those blue and white ones?” Roberto asked for confirmation, and Y/N nodded.

“Yeah, they’ll do fine. Right away, if you can,” she said and caught the barista’s nod and the suspicious look on his face and in his eyes before he walked away. Yeah, pretty, I’m not feeling entirely sure about myself, either, she thought to herself and then looked down at her phone as she waited for the drinks, cake and gloves, most importantly. There was a new text from Peter. A couple, actually.

glovesssssss??? :D

you alright y/n?

are you DRUNK???

nevermind i’ll ask when i’m thereeeeeeeee

okayyyyyyyyy on the bus now, beeeee thereeeeee in a fewwwwww

Y/N shook her head and chuckled at his mimicked response and then raised her head again. Oh, Roberto just placed a pair of blue sanitairy gloves on her table, along with a fork and the cheese cake she asked for. Now she just somehow had to get those gloves on her hands. Y/N moved the fingers of her left hand away from her phone and, while at first it didn’t do anything, slowly, second by second, inch by excruciatingly painful inch, she finally got all five of her fingers off the phone. She grunted and cheered when she did, feeling free, feeling in control again.

She turned her hand over to the side and back, moving it up close to her face to see if there’s anything suspicious or incredibly sticky on it. But no, there was nothing on her hands, nowhere on them, not the palm, not the tips of her fingers. Very strange. But she wasted no more time and got to ungluing her other hand from the McDonald’s bag, which was much harder.

She ripped the handles off the bag and huffed in frustration and slight anger.

But she closed her eyes, shook her head and tried to take the pieces of paper off her finger pads. With little more time, that worked. She had to imprison the papers between her elbow and the table and then pull her right hand back, and the papers came off perfectly. Now was the catch of putting those gloves on.

Luckily, that worked pretty well for her, without any mishaps or the gloves getting stuck to the wrong parts of her hands. It’s almost like her hands were suddenly made for wearing gloves. Y/N examined the gloves on her hands, lifting her palms up in level with her eyes, just as she caught Roberto in the corner of her eye bringing her the hot chocolates she ordered. Has she ever worn gloves before? She had no idea.

“There you go,” Roberto laid the hot chocolate cups on the table and looked over at Y/N and her gloves, “what do you need gloves for, anyway?” He inquired.

“Oh, thanks for these,” Y/N mused, “umm… just… germs.” She responded awkwardly with a shrug of her shoulders. Roberto raised an eyebrow at her. “I just read this documentary recently where they talked about the dirtiest places on the planet,” she mistakenly elaborates, and Roberto chuckled at her mishap of words, “and New York is actually the dirtiest city in the world.” She laughed. “So I… wanna be cleaner.” She lifted her gloved hands in the air and giggled. Roberto chuckled with her and began to take off.

“You’re gonna have to buy more than these two, you know,” he said, “but enjoy your drinks.” Roberto gave her a nod, and Y/N returned it. Suddenly an instinct appeared in her head to lift upwards and in the direction of the entrance door, and she heard the noise of it opening inside her head nearly a second before it actually did. “Oh, hi, Peter,” Y/N heard and saw Peter and Roberto exchange greetings, and she felt relieved that he’s finally here.

But she was just too hungry. So she took out the first thing in her McDonald’s bag and wrapped it open. A cheeseburger. Bah! The greatness of cheeseburgers. She allowed herself to smell it before starting to eat it, and the smell was so inviting and insanely good, better than usual, and she dived into it like the hungry wolf she felt she was.

She watched Peter as he came over to their beloved table, and all his confused and suspicious looks totally flew over her head. She was just excited and glad to see him on the day she could potentially die, when she’s having feelings that she’s never felt before. Unexplainable ones. Well, okay, perhaps they actually were explainable. She just wasn’t sure he’d believe her. Of course, it’s Peter—he always believes her. But this could be different.

“Hey,” Peter greeted her with a chuckle as he still stood by the table, wanting to know / see where he should sit. He looked her over, wondering what’s going on, why she was texting in that weird manner, and why she now had a full bag of food with the McDonald’s logo on it sitting next to her. So he should take the seat across her, he deducted. And so he slid into that very seat, his eyes still trained on her, watching her carefully with a slight grin on his face.

“Oh, hey!” Y/N mused, devouring her cheeseburger with a hunger and intensity he’d never seen before. Peter chuckled and looked her over again. She had gloves on her hands. She definitely must have been drunk, only why?

“What’s up?” He asked her, his feet gently poking at hers under the table. Y/N gave him a wide smile, still eating that burger.

“Something scientific happened to me, I think,” she said finally after finishing the burger, “but you can’t tell anyone, Pete.”

Peter chuckled, shaking his head and hiding his face in his hands. Somehow he loves to see her like this, “I won’t tell anyone you got drunk,” he told her immediately, and Y/N raised an eyebrow, bringing out a box of nuggets, “looks like you’ve got everything you need.” He deducted, looking at their table and what’s laid out on it. Oh, a hot chocolate for him, too! “What are the gloves about?” Peter asked and brought his cocoa closer to himself, leaning with his back into the sofa.

“I am not drunk,” Y/N assured him, “hell, I’d rather be drunk right now than have whatever the hell this is.” She admitted, excitedly opening up her box of nuggets. Peter couldn’t stop smiling at her. “I have gloves because everything I touch… just sticks to me,” she explained, “and I know how crazy that sounds. Maybe even stupid. But it’s true. And I’m not drunk, I’m not on drugs, I…” she shook her head, “you have to promise not to tell anyone. Not my mom, not our friends—”

“We don’t have any friends.”

“Oh, good! Less trouble,” she immediately responded, “but you can’t tell anyone. Like actually.” Y/N looked finally into Peter’s eyes. She held up her blue-gloved hand on the table, her pinky in the air. “You swear it.��� She made him promise. “Or I’ll never see you again and you won’t know the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me.” A grin pulled her lips upwards as she looked at Peter, watched his eyes in a precise way.

He fought the urge to laugh, still convinced she’s some form of intoxicated, and held his hand up in the same manner she’s holding up her own. Their pinkies interlinked, Peter uttered the sacred words as he looked dearly into her eyes, “I promise I won’t tell anyone.” He said and Y/N deemed it a good enough promise and gave him a nod in confirmation, withdrawing her hand. Peter still looked at her in such a sacred, appreciative manner. “Now tell me.”

She chuckled. “So… I kinda sneaked into Oscorp earlier today,” in a quieter voice she admitted the best and worst news Peter had ever heard. His eyes were immediately wide and his mouth was open in shock, and he peeled himself off the sofa to lean closer to her.

“What?!” He exclaimed in a whisper-shout, trying to keep their conversation as private and anonymous as she wished. Y/N gave him a look. “Why? What the hell did you need there? Why didn’t you tell me? You could have gotten in trouble—are you in trouble?!”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to get you into any trouble,” she explained, “and no, I didn’t get caught—well, okay, Gwen caught me wandering off from the group. But that was before I walked into this weird room full of restricted stuff only meant for staff, and there was this one room full of spiders.” Y/N shuddered. “Regular spiders, but they were… I don’t know, like being manufactured or something?” She guessed.

“Gwen? What’s Gwen doing there?” Peter was growing more confused by the second, by each word Y/N has said. Y/N sneaking into a restricted room… Room full of spiders… Gwen in OSCORP…

“Works there, I guess,” Y/N shrugged, “anyway, I think I did something wrong by accidentally pressing some switch on the wall. I wanted to get out of there as soon as I got in. You know how much I hate spiders,” she gave Peter a look and he nodded, giving her a sympathetic smile, “but they all stopped in that weird machine and started dropping down. I swear, I feel like I still have one or more on me right now.” Y/N shuddered with a disgusted look on her face. Peter hid his widening smile behind his hands crossed in front of his face as he still looked at her. That same dear, appreciative look in his eyes. “And I think… I mean, I think one of them bit me and now I’m having, like, an allergic reaction to the bite. I feel like I might die.” Her voice faltered on the last sentence and she looked Peter in the eyes again.

Peter furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait, wait, wait,” he said, “why? What do you feel? Does the bite hurt?” He reached his hands out towards Y/N, but then retracted, deciding to be closer to her than that. Peter rose from his seat and sat down next to Y/N instead, scooting her further into the sofa. Y/N gave him a look, a look of slight fear, but not from Peter. From herself more, because she’s not in total control of herself and her senses. But Peter put his arm around her, pulled her closer and stroked her hair slightly. “You can trust me, sweetheart, what hurts? Do we need to take you to the hospital?”

“No, you can’t. Mom can’t know,” she immediately shook her head and said, “and I don’t know where the bite is, no place hurts.” Y/N looked up at Peter. “I just…” she shook her head, “I hear so many things. Doors, people, cars… bugs.” She shrugged. “I could hear your jeans creaking when you came in.”

Peter raised his eyebrows. What do jeans even sound like? “My jeans…” a clueless look crossed into his eyes before he shook his head and leaned backward to look at her, “what… okay, you’re hearing things and your hands are sticky?” He clarified and Y/N nodded at his question. “Anything else?”

She furrowed her eyebrows. “Are you looking for anything? Do you know what’s going on with me?” She asked and then drew back to take a better look at Peter. “Do you know something I don’t?” There goes that instinct again. That something’s gonna happen. Only what?

“No, why would I?” Peter made a chuckle. “I just wanna know, we can always google those symptoms.” A pause between them. Google definitely gives you a death sentence because you had an accidental sneeze. “What else?”

Y/N shook her head. “My temperature’s weird, I was hungry—still am—but that’s it,” she said, “except I think my food’s way tastier than usual.” She said and relaxed against Peter’s arm, leaning into his embrace, feeling somehow relieved. Peter smiled wide at her, completely in adoration of her and loving the honor to be the one seeing all her expressions, her reactions, hearing her words and thoughts. Peter locked his hand together, both of his arms around her now, and pressed a kiss to her forehead. Y/N settled in even closer to him and closed her eyes when she rested her head against chest. She feels relieved to have told him this, to have got this off her chest, so relieved that she suddenly felt emotional. She faught back the tears and sat in his hold.

“You sure you’re not in any pain, baby?” Peter asked her as one of his hands still stroked her hair. Y/N felt a warm surge through from her chest to her toes at the wonderful nickname and she smiled. She shook her head in response. “Okay, well…” he rested his head on top of hers, “we’ll figure it out together. What’d you get from Mr Ronald McDonald?”

Y/N smiled and pulled the bag from behind her to lay in between their laps. “Bunch o’ stuff,” she said and started pulling the contents out one by one, “bacon burgers, bigmacs, nuggets, fries, my favourite sauces, peach pie, an oreo flurry…” she looked up at Peter, “you want anything?” She asked with the prettiest eyes and the most pure look on her anxious face, and Peter smiled even wider at her. He bumped his nose down with hers a couple times, making her smile and relax her facial muscles, before he laid a kiss on her lips.

“I’ll have one of those peach pies, please,” Peter whispered against her lips, looking at her with half-lidded eyes, and then made to bite the very tip of her nose, but did it only teasingly. She laughed at it, though, and leaned into him as she fished out that peach pie.

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[awheckery]

so. uh.

cut for frank discussion of chronic illness and the serious failures of the american healthcare system. tw for fatphobia and gaslighting.

Last July, I got sick. It wasn’t too bad at first: some fatigue, body aches and a slightly elevated temp, until suddenly it was bad and I wound up in the ER. It took three rounds of steroids, a round of antibiotics and a more powerful inhaler to get my feet back under me, but I never fully recovered.

I didn’t talk about it here, except for answering an ask in October and blaming my lack of creative output on depression. It really, really wasn’t depression; it was my health progressively collapsing, one system after another until the avalanche of symptoms that flattened me just after New Year’s.

For the last four months, I’ve spiked a fever over 100°F nearly every single day. My joints hurt. My knuckles are knobbly and swollen, and occasionally my fingers are so painful and weak I’ve had to literally tape my pen to my hand at work. I get rashes at random that itch so badly I claw myself bloody. I overheat and have hot flashes in temperate rooms. The skin on my face and neck and shoulders turns red and hot to the touch, like I’m burning for hours with no immediately discernible provocation.

Some days, I wake up and I don’t have the strength to get out of bed. Some days I can’t wake up at all. I’ve slept through deafening alarms for hours, long enough for my phone battery to run out and die. I can only stand up for ten minutes a day without being hobbled by the effort, and every extra minute beyond that I pay for in hours spent bedbound by exhaustion and pain.

I keep losing words. I’ll arrive at the middle of a sentence and stumble to a halt, because the word I need isn’t there. It’s not true aphasia, and it’s not all the time. I comprehend written and verbal communication perfectly well, but I can’t get my own thoughts out without tripping over them.

I am, to quote a friend attending school to be a nurse practitioner, “a textbook case for SLE,” and I agree, but somehow I can’t pay a doctor to treat me seriously.

In January, I was referred to a rheumatologist after the bloodwork my PCP ordered indicated I had autoimmune activity of some kind.

To date, that’s my only test for anything that’s come out definitively positive for any kind of disease state at all. Ever. I tested negative for celiac disease on a technicality nine years ago, despite how specifically and intensely sick gluten makes me, so I was dismayed but not too surprised when follow-up bloodwork for lupus came back just barely inside the range of “normal.” Despite that, I wasn’t prepared to be jerked around as much as I have been.

The first rheumatologist I saw, back at the end of January, had barely been in the exam room for thirty seconds when I could see he’d already made up his mind about me. He was dismissive and perfunctory and condescending when he told me that “plenty of perfectly healthy people have positive ANA results,” and he referred me back to my PCP for an exercise program and antidepressants to treat my “fibromyalgia.”

Putting aside that I’m not a “perfectly healthy person,” I’m a Fat Lady living in America, and I’ve experienced medical fatphobia for decades at this point. You learn the key words and phrases pretty quickly, and “exercise program” has never not been a euphemism for “weight loss.” (Which is heavily ironic in this particular situation, because before I was Fat, I walked 2-3 miles a day for funsies and spent 15-20 hours in the gym every week. I only stopped because I somehow shredded both my ACLs in one summer. I’d love to get back to that if a rheumatologist could help me figure out how to be active and uninjured at the same time.)

I was frustrated after that first appointment, enough to request a referral to one of the best teaching hospitals in the country. Why not go to the best, right? There was a five month wait for an appointment, but I am stubborn, and I made use of the time by documenting every bullshit symptom my body threw at me. I have a daily symptom journal, full of subjective entries like my pain and fatigue levels, as well as objective entries like daily temperature changes and photos of my rashes and my burning face and my goddamn mouth ulcers.

I thought I had enough logged to be impossible to ignore, and then I saw the second rheumatologist three weeks ago, and the first sentence out of her mouth was the beginning of an interrogation on my blood pressure, and whether I was taking medication or if I was on a fucking exercise program for it. I tried to get the appointment back on track by sharing my symptom diary, and she turned back to my just-under-the-wire test results, and told me, “many healthy people have positive ANA results, it doesn’t mean anything without other positive test results for specific conditions.”

I said, “Healthy people don’t run a fever for months.”

And then she told me that a "fever is not associated with any of the conditions a rheumatologist treats." I was so startled by the confidence and authority with which she stated the lie that I was unable to speak to rouse a defense or contribute anything else for the rest of the appointment. After an insultingly brief examination, in which I never took my face mask off and she declined to look at any of my photos, she said that she “didn’t see anything that could be rheumatologically wrong with me.”

I asked her what she thought could be wrong with me, and she grudgingly admitted it’s possible, though rare to have an autoimmune disease and test negative for everything, so she would order more tests and refer me to appropriate specialists for my various symptoms. She ordered a referral to an infectious disease specialist for my fevers, and a referral to a dermatologist for my “rosacea” (that she’s assuming I have, because I would like to again note she did not see it, at no point did she actually look at my face or a photo of it), and a referral to an ENT for a salivary gland biopsy for my dry mouth, and a referral to a neurologist for my “stroke-like” memory and speech problems.

It was, all told, an unbearably shitty appointment. I cried in my car for an hour in the hospital parking garage so I wouldn’t do anything impulsive like lying down in traffic, and then I went home, cried some more, and went to bed for three days.

On the fourth day, I woke up enraged. It’s one thing to be blown off by a doctor when you’re just reporting symptoms without proof, it’s a wholly different thing for a doctor to ignore your proof and lie about diagnostic criteria to your face.

It’s hard enough not to think you’re crazy when your test results come back negative over and over; it’s that much harder after being told that your major concrete measurable symptom is diagnostically irrelevant, when it really, really isn’t.

(for the record, just going off the symptoms I can concretely prove I’ve experienced in the last week alone, I land a 16 on this chart, which is the most up-to-date, widely agreed-upon diagnostic criteria)

I have decided, for the moment, to play ball. I don’t have the energy to jump through all the hoops this rheumatologist wants, but I'm angry enough to drag myself through them. Tomorrow I’m supposed to see the infectious diseases specialist. On Wednesday I see the dermatologist. In two weeks I see the ENT, and I’ve got a neurology appointment tentatively scheduled for December.

I’m going to be blisteringly forthright with all of these doctors about why I’m there, and that I’m looking to exclude diagnoses other than the lupus I pretty obviously have. (Except with the ENT. Apparently they treat allergies, and I’d like to be able to go outside long enough to walk a dog, someday.)

I’m supposed to see this rheumatologist again at the end of November. Depending on how this week’s appointments go, I’m aiming to either move up my appointment with her when one becomes available, or just send a firm yet diplomatic email asking why the diagnostic criteria apply to everyone but me.

If anybody else has gotten through this fucking nightmare successfully, I’m open to suggestions, it’s not like it can get worse at this point.

[bcbdrums]

A Day in the Life of Bonnie Rockwaller

What, not a Drakgo fic!?  No...no it is not.  This one is all about Bonnie.

A girl only really seen through one lens on the show, perhaps misunderstood... A cheerleader, twelve-years a ballerina, a good student, the youngest in her family, and dating a football star. The "mean girl."

What is her life really like?

Happy (belated) birthday to the amazing @sharperthewriter!

FFn     AO3

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A Day in the Life of Bonnie Rockwaller

The alarm clock went off too soon for Bonnie Rockwaller on that Thursday morning. With a groan she reached over and slapped the device until the beeping stopped, and then blinked at the bright sunlight creating a glow at the edge of her teal curtains.

She didn't want to get up. But winners didn't sleep in.

She rolled out of bed, untwisting her dark red leopard print pajama bottoms and spaghetti strap top from where they had shifted in her restless sleep. She hadn't slept well, again.

She slipped her feet into her fuzzy slippers that matched the pajama set and grabbed her phone off her nightstand, unplugging it as she hastily flipped it open to check her messages.

There weren't any.

She pushed down the pang that tried to creep into her chest, and instead turned to her wall calendar next to her desk. She paused for a moment to look in the bright mirror above the desk, tousling her hair with one hand and giving a half-grin at the way it fell over her shoulders. She looked incredible even straight out of bed.

The pang tried to enter her heart again, and she frowned and turned to the calendar, confirming the day's events with what she already had in her phone planner. After cheer practice she planned to go to the boutique for the final fitting of her homecoming dress, and that night she had ballet.

After nodding to herself that all was correct, she flipped over to her text messages out of habit. Her thumb hovered over the message at the top that hadn't been replied to from the night before as she considered sending another. But then with a scowl and another pang she closed the phone and tossed it onto her unmade bed.

She stepped over to the barre that her parents had had installed in her room and began her routine of ballet stretches. She forced the distracting thoughts about the lack of message reply away and started going over the new Mad Dogs cheer routine in her head. Ever since she and Kim had become co-captains of the squad, she couldn't help but admit...the routines had gotten better. And harder.

Bonnie sighed.

After finishing the stretches she changed into her black leggings, blue sports bra, socks, and running shoes. With the workout she knew she was going to get after school, she needed to get plenty warmed up ahead of time. Plus, she was worried she might have gained a few pounds in the last month and might not fit into her gown.

After tying her shoes, she grabbed her mp3 player and set it on her workout playlist, which included her favorite upbeat songs by Britina, MC Honey, the Oh Boyz, SmashMouth, and more. She also had some strange rap song that she'd seen once on American Starmaker that had topped the charts, but she could never remember the name of the artist.

She popped her earbuds in and hurried past the bedrooms of her siblings, hurrying out the door of the split-level home into the crisp, cool morning air. She set her stopwatch for seven and a half minutes and began jogging down the sidewalk, the golden light of the sunrise beginning to warm her skin within minutes.

Against her will, her mind fell back to the unanswered text from the night before. It wasn't that Brick hadn't been slow to reply in the past... In fact, his replies were coming slower and slower lately.

Bonnie couldn't ignore the pang in her chest that time, and she took a deep breath and ran faster. There were plenty of logical reasons her boyfriend might not be answering her texts. He was in college, after all. He had homework...which...he had never really done much of in high school, but the fact that he'd made it through one semester of college so far meant he must be doing at least some now.

She told herself again she was worrying over nothing. He had always been confused about things that were important to her, and to girls in general. He would read her text that day and confirm about the dance, and then she would send him a picture of her gown so he could buy the matching corsages.

The alarm on her stopwatch went off, and she turned around and started jogging back in the direction of home at a faster pace than she'd begun. As she felt the adrenaline pump through her from the run, she got an idea. She didn't need to wait for Brick to reply... She could just send the picture of the dress after she tried it on. That would give him the hint. He had probably just forgotten to reply anyway...

Bonnie finished her run with confidence, and when she returned home she hurried past her siblings in the kitchen, grateful for the loud hip-hop music currently playing in her ears so she wouldn't have to hear anything they might say to her. Though it was unlikely they would.

Her older brother by one year, Jonny, was sitting on the kitchen counter with his dirty sock-clad feet on the refrigerator door, playing some hand-held video game. Her even older sisters, Connie and Lonnie, were seated at the kitchen table leaning over a fashion magazine and a laptop computer, shopping online she assumed. They would curb the behavior when their parents came out for the 'family breakfast' they insisted on each day, before each family member would vanish to their various obligations.

Bonnie wasn't upset about family breakfasts really; ever since her dad bought her a car, she barely saw her family, since each member in turn had previously driven her everywhere she needed to go—her siblings with complaints, of course. Now she was wholly independent, so the breakfasts held more meaning to her.

After returning to her room, she glanced at her phone still on the bed. She thought about her plan to text Brick later after she picked up her dress...which would be in about nine hours.

The pang of worry hit her chest again.

She grabbed the phone along with her bathrobe as she went back down the hall to take a shower. She opened the phone and looked at the text she had sent the prior evening before dinner that remained unanswered.

*You're still free next Saturday for the homecoming dance, right?*

Still breathless from the run and with sweat irritating the center of her back, she started the shower and then scrolled through the prior texts between she and Brick over the past couple of weeks, noting the slow times between his responses compared to her quick ones, and his lack of many words. After a moment of tense indecision, she fired off another quick text.

*I'll send you a photo of my gown after school!*

She set the phone down and grimaced as she started to undress. A lack of words wasn't anything new, and she was stunned as she realized she was telling herself not to worry. Why should she worry? She shouldn't even have let that thought in her head.

She frowned and leaned over the counter, staring at her face in the mirror as it started to become fogged with steam.

"I have nothing to worry about," she reassured herself out loud, and after giving herself a crisp nod, she adjusted the water temperature and made haste to shower.

She thought about Brick's class and football schedules, which...she'd had to badger him for back in the fall. They weren't consistent day to day, and he even had night classes a couple of days a week. These offered plenty of reasons why he might not have replied to her text messages. A college boy was busy.

After another swath of reassuring thoughts she felt her confidence returning. And then just as she switched the shower off, she heard the telltale beep of her phone indicating a message received.

She nearly slipped on the tile as she hurried to the phone, only half-drying her hands before flipping it open. The text was from Brick.

*Call me later.*

Bonnie read the words five times as her heart began to race, and then she mentally shook herself and quickly dried the phone off before drying off herself and putting on her bathrobe.

The text was a positive. He wanted to talk to her. Right...? Usually it was she who called him, and he only answered half of the time anyway... Come to think of it, he never said much over the phone. He just hummed responses to what she said to him.

Bonnie frowned into the fogged-up mirror as she began to blow-dry her hair. She didn't need to read any more into the text than was there. He probably wanted to talk about logistics for the dance.

She let the sound of the blow dryer drown out her thoughts, and as soon as her hair was no longer damp at the roots she unplugged the blow dryer and set the appliance on the counter before snatching up her phone again and storming down the hall back to her bedroom.

When she stepped through the door, she hit her ankle hard on something and tripped, plummeting forward with a gasp. Her phone flew out of her hand and was forgotten as she tucked into a somersault and came out of the fall safely and on her feet. She took hardly a second to catch her breath before whirling around and pushing her hair out of her eyes as she scowled. Her full laundry basket on the floor was the culprit, but her eyes narrowed as she realized it was the load she had put in the night before...and it wasn't clean nor dry.

"Lonnie!" she shouted before even leaving her room, turning the short distance down the hall to her older sister's room. "Why aren't my clothes clean? And why did you put dirty clothes back in my room!?"

She had just reached the door when it opened a sliver, and she could just see her sister's blonde hair and smirk.

"Oh sorry B, forgot to tell you I took your clothes out last night to do mine," Lonnie said, her tone rife with sarcasm. "Needed my intimates done before my date later."

"You could have waited your turn! Why didn't you tell me last night?" Bonnie said through gritted teeth, her hands in fists at her sides as she seethed.

"Mmh, guess it slipped my mind. Sorry, B..." she answered as she pushed the door closed, drawing out the 'sorry' in an all too familiar way.

"Rrrgh!" Bonnie snarled, hitting the closed door with a flat palm before turning on her heel to head back to her room.

"Sheesh, Bonnie, take a chill pill."

Bonnie blinked and saw Jonny leaning against the wall, not looking up from his video game.

"Quiet, nerdlinger!"

"Hmph," was Jonny's only reply, said through a smirk with a shrug.

"I have nothing to wear now!"

"Wow, nothing," he replied flatly, clearly disbelieving and disinterested.

Bonnie took a sharp breath in through her nose and was about to retort when Connie poked her head out of her own doorway.

"Nothing that'll help, anyway," she said with a slight giggle and smirk, giving Bonnie a once-over.

"Connie!"

Her eldest sister disappeared into her bedroom, and the sound of another door closing was her alert that her brother had departed too. Bonnie stood alone in the hallway for a moment, seething and feeling irrationally like she might cry before she shoved the emotion away and stalked back to her room.

Winners didn't cry.

She glanced into the laundry basket, noting all of her favorites wrinkled and wet from half a wash cycle, including her planned outfit for that day. She sighed and stepped to the closet, looking at the variety of things she didn't often choose because they were old, out of style, or weren't appropriate for school for one reason or another.

After several minutes pushing through every item and muttering about things being out of season, she grabbed an old favorite crop top she'd forgotten about and probably hadn't worn since freshman year. After scanning the array of bottoms in her closet and not finding a suitable match, she reached into the far corner and grabbed the old, baggy Club Banana overalls she'd used to wear with that top all the time.

When she got dressed she realized two things quickly: first, that sleeveless purple and teal tie dye racer-back crop top was quite snug, rode up higher than it used to, and showed her bra under her arms; second, that the overalls were also just a touch too small. They hugged her hips and her rear in a way she actually found attractive as she spun in front of the mirror, but the straps weren't fitting entirely over her shoulders and even hurt a little.

She frowned slightly as she unbuckled one strap and let it fall over her back, and the bib ever so slightly forward. It relieved enough pressure from the garment that she felt comfortable in the choice, and after looking at the very obvious sides of her bra showing under her arms, she unhooked the undergarment at the back, pulled off the straps, and then took the garment off through one of the arm holes in the style of Raquel Spring from "Pals." She dropped it in the laundry basket with a frown, determining then and there she would have to get back at Lonnie for potentially ruining her wardrobe.

After another quick spin in the mirror and deciding she looked good enough, Bonnie put on her socks and shoes and hurried back to the bathroom to quickly do her hair and makeup. Her parents would be upset, but she wasn't sure if she'd have time for breakfast anymore. The clothing problem had slowed her down, plus she suddenly remembered some math homework she'd left unfinished the night before in favor of working on memorizing the latest ballet routine.

Her focus fell to the unfinished math word problems—why were word problems so hard?—as she fixed her hair with the blow dryer and a round brush into its usual style, and then hurriedly put on her makeup.

After giving a satisfied nod to her appearance, she hurried back to her bedroom again. She closed her homework into her math book and shoved it in her backpack, knowing she'd have a better chance of getting it done and being on time if she did it after she arrived at school, maybe during her first class. It was with that somewhat shaky resolution that she threw her backpack over her shoulder and then grabbed up the laundry basket and headed down the hall.

She ignored the smirks of her siblings as she strode past them and quickly got the load of laundry started. Her mom didn't have to work for a couple of hours yet...

When she returned to the kitchen, she noted her three older siblings expressions had sobered as they sat dutifully around the table eating their usual breakfast meals, and her parents with them. Bonnie took a deep breath.

"Mom, when my laundry finishes can you put it in the dryer? And hang up the other things?"

Her mother looked up from her dish in confusion.

"I thought you did laundry last night?"

"I started to, but somebody decided theirs was more important," Bonnie said, hands on her hips as she glared at her older sister.

Veronica Rockwaller gave a disapproving frown toward the blonde-haired young woman, who merely shrugged.

"She didn't come back to dry it anyway," Lonnie said.

"I fell asleep doing homework!"

Bonnie's father, who until that point had been invisible behind his newspaper, cleared his throat.

"Bonnie..."

Bonnie groaned and rolled her eyes. "Yes, I know I'm supposed to sleep at least seven hours each night. I got them," she assured him. She didn't think it important to add they'd been spent tossing and turning, worrying about Brick. And that the same worry was what kept her from finishing the homework.

She turned to the cupboard and took out a protein bar before spinning around and heading for the front door.

"Bonnie!" her mother sang in a disappointed tone as she walked past. Her father looked up from his paper and coffee again with a raised brow.

"Sorry Mom, sorry Dad, I have just enough time to finish my homework if I leave now," she said by way of excuse.

"But Bon-Bon!"

Bonnie looked from her mother's disappointed face to her father's. Donald 'Donny' Rockwaller lifted his hand in a vague gesture that she could leave, and she grinned and flipped her hair with one hand as she turned to hide her relief.

"Now Ronnie, schoolwork comes first. At least she won't miss dinner," her father said pointedly. "Especially since it'll be the last family dinner before our trip this weekend."

Bonnie froze at the tone in her father's voice and glanced back over her shoulder. He was staring at her over his newspaper.

"Of course not!" she said with a broad, innocent smile. She thought a moment. "...But I do need to pick up my homecoming dress after cheer practice today."

"Oh, I can come with you!" her mother said brightly.

Bonnie's smile faded to a panicked frown and she started waving her hand in a stopping motion. But her attention shifted suddenly as her sisters spoke.

"You mean they found a dress to actually fit that shape?" Connie said.

"Clearly nothing else does," Lonnie said, giving a disgusted look at Bonnie's current attire.

"Ladies," their father admonished, and Bonnie turned to leave in a hurry amid her mother's scolding of her older sisters and her brother's snickering. She wasn't about to let her mother come along to the dress fitting, or anywhere else where they could be seen together by people she knew—not since the ski trip incident.

In the driveway, she dropped her backpack on the passenger seat of her white convertible and sighed as she sank into the tan leather driver's seat. After tuning the radio to her favorite hip-hop station and cranking the volume, she began the drive to school, letting the sound of the wind and the music carry her thoughts away.

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When Bonnie walked through the halls of the school and saw Kim Possible standing in front of her open locker, she actually perked up. She needed to talk to Kim about the complexity of the final sequence in the new cheer routine before practice. She began quickening her pace, but stopped short when Kim's locker was pushed closed by a confidently grinning Ron Stoppable, dressed uncharacteristically in his football jersey.

Bonnie stopped and took a step nearer the other wall of lockers as if it could hide her while the...the loser of a held-back senior Kim now called 'boyfriend' leaned over the red-head at her locker and set his hand on her waist, kissing her in a very suave move. Bonnie blinked at the scene in shock, feeling a sinking in her stomach and an actual camaraderie with Stoppable's hairless pet which was scrubbing at its eyes from the football star's pocket.

'Football star...'

"Whoa, put out the fire you two!" was the declaration of Kim's other best friend, Monique, who Bonnie could find no fault with except for choosing the other two as companions. The girl was confident, trendy, smart, and someone she could have called 'friend' herself. But apparently Kim had gotten to her first.

Bonnie passed the trio without a word as they began chatting and hurried to what was their joint homeroom. She needed to finish that math homework and would need a seat in the back if she was to avoid Mr. Barkin's watchful gaze. And the last thing she wanted right then was to hear about how great life was the world-famous world-saving cheerleader.

She remembered Brick's text and reached in her pocket for her phone, and then froze.

It wasn't there.

She remembered with a fury that she had dropped it earlier that morning when she tripped on the laundry basket, and she mentally swore further revenge against all of her siblings for the crime. They deserved it for the years of tormenting her anyway.

She dropped her math book heavily on the too-small desk and leaned over the homework paper, one hand on her forehead to hide her face as she stared down at the problems in the book.

She stared at the words and numbers while her classmates gradually filed in and took their seats around her. She barely acknowledged Tara's cheery 'good morning' as she read over the first word problem again and again, unable to focus long enough to finish it, and she tuned out the tardy bell and Mr. Barkin's gruff greeting to the class.

All she could think about was Brick's text. She couldn't remember another time he had asked her to call. In fact, their phone conversations usually ended with him interrupting whatever she was talking about and asking if he could call her back another time...which...he never did.

A telltale buzzing made her reach instinctively for her phone, and she frowned when it wasn't there. She glanced over at Tara in the next desk, who was grinning down at her phone in her lap.

Tara saw her friend's attention and after a moment and a glance at Mr. Barkin who was writing on the chalkboard, she passed the cell phone to Bonnie.

Bonnie smirked as she saw it was an update to Stoppable's blog, and she glanced to where the blond-haired boy sat next to Kim in the front row. He had his phone in his lap, and he seemed to be typing blindly with one thumb while his hairless pink pet typed at the same time. She frowned and shook her head in confusion as she looked back to Tara's phone for the latest gossip.

*A reliable source has reported that Dr. Drakken and Shego have been looking at real estate in Tahiti. Is it a new lair, or a romantic vacation home?*

Bonnie rolled her eyes and passed the phone back to Tara. While that pair of villains were among the most interesting, she was tired of the 'are they or aren't they?' that Stoppable kept spinning to keep interest in the blog.

"Well?" whispered Tara, and Bonnie looked at her while keeping one eye on Mr. Barkin. "What do you think?"

"I don't think it matters where they do it?" Bonnie whispered back.

"They're totally a couple!" Tara said with a small giggle, scrolling through the other posts on the blog.

Bonnie shook her head and looked down at her math book again, feeling like she might be able to focus at last. As she finally began writing figures on the paper to solve the first word problem, she realized she'd wasted most of homeroom and hadn't heard even a word of Mr. Barkin's lecture. She tried to tune into it as she wrote, ignoring the giggles off to her right and the grin of her cheer co-captain a few rows ahead.

It was bad enough she had to watch Kim and Ron making out in the hallway. The last thing she needed was to think about happy villain couples too, when she couldn't hardly remember the last time she'd had Brick's arm around her.

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"And five, six, seven, eight and aerial...three...down...V...and left, right, left, right and to-the-base!" Kim called out the beats of the cheer routine, watching with arms crossed in front of the bleachers.

Bonnie, up in front and with the mirrored role to Kim's, had the most difficult steps and was trying to complete her moves while also listening to Kim's commands to the rest of the squad for her timing. It was going well, exactly like she'd practiced in her bedroom the night before. They had collaborated on this routine and were sure it could win the next competition, but of course, they all had to start somewhere in learning it.

As she felt sweat beginning to form on her brow she remembered the competition last year, when Brick had sat in the front row cheering her on. She'd gotten a major thrill bragging about him to the girls from other squads, who had all been envious of her gorgeous, all-American boyfriend.

"And liberty...to scorpion... Bonnie!"

Bonnie felt the weight shift from Tara below who was her base, and realized she'd failed to shift into the scorpion pose. Which meant when Hope next to her, standing in for Kim, had nowhere to place her foot for the next move when their feet were supposed to touch. She watched in a mixture of annoyance, fear, and embarrassment as Hope went down despite Crystal's efforts, and she quickly lost balance too, landing in a forward lunge when her feet finally hit the gym floor.

When she righted herself she found every member of the squad staring at her. It wasn't often she found herself in this position, as it was usually her leading the glares toward Kim who was often distracted by her 'missions' and more recently, her steady boyfriend.

The heat came to Bonnie's cheeks and she crossed her arms and turned away with a frown.

"I didn't have the balance for scorpion, it would have been worse if I'd tried," she said by way of excuse.

"Maybe if you'd lose a few pounds," Tanzy said not entirely under her breath, earning a few gasps from the long-time members of the squad.

"Why, you—!"

"O-kay," Kim said with authority. "Bonnie, let's swap. You call the routine and I'll hop in."

Bonnie was torn in that moment between arguing that she wouldn't mess up again and taking the pass and actually watching the routine as she called it. She wanted to watch it again anyway, but she was uncertain in the moment which was the less embarrassing of the two options.

As Kim raised a questioning and slightly impatient brow in her direction, she rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"Fine, get up there."

Bonnie watched as Hope and Jessica swapped places, Jessica being Bonnie's stand-in as Hope was Kim's. Then when everyone was back in place in the starting positions, she began calling the counts and moves.

She was glad she'd made that choice, because she had no choice but to focus and for at least the rest of practice, Brick didn't enter her mind at all. Not even when they had played the music and she and Kim had both operated in their regular positions. She hated to admit it, but they were a good team as co-captains.

It wasn't until later after showering in the locker room and waiting for Tara to finish fixing her hair that Bonnie began to dwell on the situation with Brick again. She was also worried that he might have sent her another message while her phone was at home, somewhere on her bedroom floor. What if he had tried to call, and her lack of response made him think she was ignoring him? What if he'd wanted her to call right after school, or after cheer practice?

"What's wrong, Bonnie?"

Bonnie startled from her thoughts and realized her brow had been twisted in so much worry, that it hurt. She uncrossed her arms and pushed off of the wall in the girl's locker room where she'd been leaning.

"Nothing, you ready to go?" she asked Tara, who was fluffing her golden, wavy hair.

"You bet! I can't wait to see your gown! And guess what, the boutique left me a voicemail during practice. Mine came in today too!"

"Yeah that's great. I need to run home first, that all right?"

"Oh...sure, what for?" Tara asked, hurrying behind Bonnie who had slung her backpack on her back and started out of the locker room.

"For my phone," Bonnie answered somewhat impatiently.

"Ohhh right... Do you think Brick might have messaged you?"

Bonnie felt that pang in her chest again and increased her pace. She had confided to Tara about her missing phone, but hadn't fully admitted her fears that Brick was losing interest in her.

"Maybe. He usually waits for me to reply, unless he's asking for homework help."

Tara continued talking, but Bonnie barely listened until they reached her convertible in the parking lot. They tossed their backpacks in the trunk and then Bonnie sat heavily in the driver's seat with a sigh. The fall earlier during practice, though she had landed fine, had definitely been a shock to her system.

"Bonnie?"

"Hmm?"

"I said, do you think the hot pink will be too much?"

"I've been telling you for years to let go of the green."

"Well it's a kind of a—"

"Never-mind, I'll see it when we get there," Bonnie said as she started the car.

She stared straight ahead, ignoring the concerned and confused look she knew Tara was giving her. She grabbed her sunglasses off the car's sun visor and hid her eyes behind them.

She couldn't focus on the conversation about gowns with the possibility of a missed call from Brick swirling around in her head. Not to mention the sudden increased concern that her gown wouldn't fit after Tanzy's comment at practice.

Back in the locker room she had direly wanted to ask Kim if she had gained weight, knowing the red-head would be honest, but she hadn't. Now she wanted to ask Tara, but she wasn't sure if her friend wouldn't sugar-coat the answer just to please her.

Bonnie flipped the radio station to pop, Tara's favorite, and gave her a half-smile that seemed to assuage any concerns her friend may have had. She turned the music up higher to avoid any possibility of conversation and drove the familiar route back home, unable to deny the anxiety now coursing through her as the promise of getting to her phone was near.

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Bonnie parked her car near the house after driving perhaps too quickly up her family's long driveway, if Tara's slightly startled expression was any indication. She kept her sunglasses on to hide her slightly guilty expression as she grabbed her backpack from the trunk and hurried up the steps.

"If my sibs aren't around you can help yourself to anything in the fridge," Bonnie called over her shoulder as Tara hurried behind her.

She didn't feel like stopping at Bueno Nacho or anywhere else on the way to the boutique, but it had definitely been too long since lunch.

The house, gratefully, seemed empty when they went inside, and Bonnie nodded toward the fridge before heading down the hall to her room. It was just a quick stop for her phone and a snack before they would head back to try on their gowns.

In her room, Bonnie took her planner and the books for that night's homework out of her backpack and placed them on her desk, knowing she might forget otherwise after ballet later that night. She glanced at her watch as she dropped her backpack and began calculating how much time she would have, and then frowned. There was really only time to try on the dresses, make the final payment if they fit, and then drive Tara home. Then she would barely make it home through rush hour traffic in time for the family dinner, and then she would have to hurry off to ballet.

She wouldn't be able to start her homework until after eight thirty that night. Or call Brick.

A quick search of the room revealed her phone on the floor near the barre, and she flipped it open to find six missed text messages. Two were from Tara that morning, the second of which asking why she wasn't answering texts. Bonnie rolled her eyes.

She cringed at the text from Kim asking why she was late for practice, and it was with dismay she saw that the other three were from Liz, Crystal, and Hope. Brick hadn't sent any other messages, and there were no missed calls.

Bonnie put the phone in the hip pocket of her overalls, frowning at the discomfort it gave her since the older garment was slightly too snug.

'Or maybe you've just put on a few pounds...'

She shook that thought from her head as she fished in her backpack for her wallet. She glanced at the math book at the top of the pile of homework on her desk and frowned at the memory of turning in an incomplete paper earlier that day, and then she looked up at the mirror. Her hair was more limp for the rigor of cheer practice, but there wasn't time to do anything with it.

Bonnie chose a teal purse from the several she had hanging behind her door and shouldered it after putting her phone and wallet inside. She hurried back to the kitchen where she found Tara eating a pudding cup.

"Those are Jonny's," Bonnie commented, knowing her brother would be upset. Not that she cared... She just knew she would probably take the heat for it.

"Oh, sorry," Tara said with a small giggle as she licked the butterscotch from her lips.

Bonnie opened the fridge and after a sad perusal, she grabbed one of her brother's pudding cups too. She plopped down on the bar stool next to Tara and opened the cup, staring blankly at the cabinets opposite as she dug her spoon in.

"...Did Brick call?" Tara asked after a moment of silence.

"No," Bonnie said, then spooning a larger bite into her mouth. While she could no longer ignore the growing concern that Brick was losing interest in her, she still didn't want to talk about it. Because if Brick was in fact losing interest...she didn't want to think forward to what would come after that conversation.

"Ryan left me a message during practice," Tara commented.

Bonnie nodded approvingly as she licked her spoon.

"Status."

"But he was always trying to cop a feel," Tara continued with a frown.

Bonnie smirked. "And you care?"

Tara's frown deepened.

"Right, I get it. You're waiting for 'love'," Bonnie said, drawing out the last word sarcastically.

"So are you," Tara retorted, "unless something's changed?"

"Nothing's changed," Bonnie said, glancing back at the cabinets and letting her vision blur as she took another bite.

"Look, I like making out but Ryan just doesn't understand where the line is," Tara said thoughtfully.

Bonnie silently ate her pudding as she thought about her physical relationship with Brick. He was a good kisser, and she always felt a sense of pride curled up under his arm, whether they were at the movies or at a party after a game. He'd never given her any indications he wanted more, so they'd never talked about it. But what if...that was part of why he was losing interest now? Had he met someone else who gave him more?

Bonnie considered their on-again, off-again relationship over the past three and a half years. It was always she who had broken up with him when they were 'off,' due to his lack of attention or some rude comment he had made. She'd always just assumed he would be there when she had cooled down, and he was. Even the time he'd seemed interested in Kim during sophomore year, she hadn't worried, because she knew he wasn't Kim's type.

'Her loss!'

As she thought about it further, she realized that the last few times they'd broken up...she couldn't remember Brick protesting. Or even seeming that upset. Or...happy when she'd declared they were back together.

The pang in her chest turned to a swirling unease in her stomach, and she glanced to the side to see that Tara had just finished her pudding. She grabbed the small plastic cup and spoon out her hands, earning a surprised squeak, and carried them and her own unfinished pudding around to the sink where she dropped the spoons in and then tossed the pudding cups in the trash.

"Come on," Bonnie said abruptly, shifting her purse to her other shoulder. It had been on the one with the overall strap, and she realized the garment was a bit uncomfortable over her shoulder after all.

"What'd I say?" Tara questioned. "Look, I'm over that Ryan is a celebrity... Jason's never tried to push the boundaries, and that matters more to me."

"Fine, whatever," Bonnie said as she headed back out the door. "Long as he's got the cash."

"We go out," Tara defended her own on-and-off boyfriend.

"To places other than Bueno Nacho?" Bonnie accused as they got back into the car.

"Yes," Tara said emphatically, sounding almost hurt. "And he even told me he'll take me to Chez Couteaux before homecoming."

"How do you know he's not gonna turn out like Ryan did?" Bonnie retorted as she started the car.

"Bonnie!"

"Just saying," Bonnie responded with a shrug and a frown.

She turned the music back on as she backed the car out of the driveway. The conversation had only increased her worries about Brick to the point she didn't even bother denying them anymore. What if that was the reason he was distant from her? What if he had in fact found someone else who was more the kind of girl he wanted?

What...what was the kind of girl Brick wanted? Bonnie felt the uneasy feeling in her stomach intensify as she suddenly worried that she wasn't it...

----------------------

"I've been telling you for years Tara, jewel tones," Bonnie said, watching Tara look uncertainly at the gown she wore that in Bonnie's opinion was a dream come true.

Tara's choice that year was a dark hot pink strapless mermaid gown, satin until the mermaid flare at the bottom where the material was tulle. The bust was covered in tiny rhinestones that faded away down the bodice, which Bonnie thought were a great compliment to her figure.

"Are you sure?"

"Sometimes your favorite colors just aren't ones you can wear," Bonnie said, leaning back on the bench and crossing her legs again. "With your hair, eyes, and complexion... Jewel tones, Tara."

Tara's expression brightened at Bonnie's reassurance, though her brow still showed uncertainty.

"Look, it's perfect. Just take it off and I'll put mine on," Bonnie said, rising from the bench and moving into the adjacent fitting room. She quickly divested herself of her shoes, overalls, and tank top and then carefully removed her gown from its hanger.

As she stepped into the dress and slipped the straps up over her shoulders, she felt a comfortable, familiar confidence settle over her that she'd lacked that day—the confidence of looking good.

She zipped up the black dress and adjusted the raspberry colored chiffon sash at the waist which folded and had a panel that draped down the front nearly to the floor. The dress had two high slits up each side and a deep V-neck, with straps that thinned over the shoulders. She smiled as she mentally pictured the way it would look with her hair and makeup done to perfection, and black heels to match. Ruby earrings would complete the look...

She straightened up in front of the fitting room mirror as a vision entered her mind of Brick standing at her side wearing a black tuxedo, with a cummerbund and bow-tie to match her sash. They would have to be dyed of course, along with roses for the corsages, but there was still plenty of time.

The excitement that had bubbled up in her chest at how great she and Brick would look walking into the homecoming dance together burst suddenly as all of her insecurities about their relationship suddenly came back. She felt in her purse for her phone and after pulling it out flipped it open. There had been no messages or missed calls in the time she and Tara and been out so far.

She turned to face the mirror again, posed and grinned, and then moved her phone around in one hand trying to get the best angle and also capture the entire dress. It took three tries, but she finally got an image she was okay with and sent it in a message to Brick.

*Match everything to the sash.*

As she looked at the image once more before pushing send she felt her confidence returning. She was the hottest girl at Middleton High, and Brick had never looked at anyone else in the almost three years they had been together. She had nothing to worry about.

She sent the text, put her phone back in her purse, and then exited the fitting room. Tara was dressed in her school clothes again and seated on the bench Bonnie had previously occupied, her folded hands atop the knee of her crossed leg which she was swinging as she smiled and waited patiently. When she focused her attention on Bonnie, her mouth fell open in a gasp.

"Oh, Bonnie that's gorgeous!"

"I know. Doesn't it just scream 'me'?" she said with a grin, slowly spinning and then striking a pose.

"It's perfect!"

"Like I said. Me."

Just then, a wolf-whistle startled them and drew both of their attentions to where about ten feet away a vaguely familiar red-headed teen boy stood. Bonnie realized in a moment it was one of their classmates, but she wasn't entirely sure of his name. She couldn't recall ever actually speaking to him.

"Smokin'!" he said, giving her a thumbs up and a grin that revealed less than perfect teeth.

Bonnie recoiled in mild disgust, though she couldn't argue with the compliment.

"Yeah, way too hot for you," Bonnie said in retort. She meant it derisively, but the look Tara gave her made her wonder if it had accidentally come off as flirty.

The guy continued looking her over without any pretense, and Bonnie racked her brain for his name. All she could really recall about him was that his tired, baggy eyes were always staring at a computer screen and that he had never once been in gym class.

"So, got a date for the homecoming dance?" he asked, his look becoming practically lascivious.

The boy's name finally registered in Bonnie's mind.

"Uh, yeah. And if you come with twenty feet of me at the dance Reiger, I'll tell my boyfriend Brick that you asked me out."

Ronald Reiger seemed to snap out of his hormone-motivated stupor, but it didn't last long as a devious smirk returned to his face.

"I didn't think Flagg liked his babes with so much junk in the trunk. But I sure do," Reiger said, wagging his eyebrows knowingly.

Bonnie sputtered incoherently for a moment before a shrill scream left her throat. Every face in the boutique suddenly turned to look at her, and Bonnie's face reddened in both anger and embarrassment as Reiger left the store laughing.

Bonnie's hands were clenched in fists at her sides as she seethed, the conversation already replaying in her mind. So focused was she on the horrible things Reiger had said, that she didn't notice Tara had been speaking to her until she felt her friend's hand on her shoulder.

"He never even goes to the dances. Just ignore him."

Bonnie took a deep breath and tried to calm down, but she still felt the sting of embarrassment as multiple eyes continued to watch her.

"Tara," she began, not liking how pathetic her voice sounded, "have I gained weight?"

"No! If anything you're slimmer," Tara said, her usual happy-go-lucky smile back on her face.

"Really?" Bonnie asked, starting to straighten up from the hunch she'd not realized she'd fallen into.

"Oh yeah. You look great! Especially in the varsity cheer uniform. You rock it!"

Bonnie looked straight into Tara's eyes and saw the sincerity; she wasn't just trying to butter her up.

She pushed her hair back and fought the twisting of emotions in her chest, glancing away when she finally said a quiet, "Thanks."

"Besides, Reiger's been crushing on you since middle school," Tara continued thoughtfully, "but I've never seen him with anyone. He's probably got his own issues."

Bonnie looked up in surprise. "Since middle school!?"

Tara looked confused. "Yeah. I thought you knew."

"Ew! No, that's the first time I've ever acknowledged that loser's existence!"

Tara looked confused again. "Don't you remember he asked you to dance in seventh grade, at the welcome back dance?"

Bonnie blinked at her. "I thought you said he never goes to dances."

"Not since that one. He asked you to dance and you said no."

Bonnie searched her memory, but all she could recall of that first dance in seventh grade was how hot she had looked in her black and white leopard print skirt and hot pink blouse with the matching collar.

"Ugh, let's just pay for the gowns and get out of here before some other loser shows up."

"Hey," Tara said, and Bonnie felt a hand on her shoulder again, "this was fun. We barely hang out anymore. I'm glad we could fit this in."

"Yeah," Bonnie said with a quick smile before hurrying back into her fitting room.

As she changed back into her crop top and overalls she thought about Tara's words. It was true, they hadn't been hanging out as much since Tara had finally given up on that loser Stoppable part-way through junior year. Once she had stopped pining over him she found she enjoyed dating around, which meant less time for friends. And of course, varsity cheer took up more of both of their free time. They hardly saw each other outside of school activities anymore.

Bonnie considered the things in her own life that were keeping her busy. Ballet was four nights a week now that she was in the highest level, and for the past month she had spent all of her free time...worrying about Brick's diminishing communication. They had only been out on a date once in the last three weeks, but she realized she had been purposely keeping her evenings free just in case he wanted to see her. He was only going to the University of Lowerton after all, so it wasn't that far a drive.

But he hadn't mentioned going out once since their last date. He only responded to her messages, and barely at that...

Bonnie scowled as her mood soured again, but she didn't let it impact her carefully hanging the gown back on its hanger. The boost she had gotten from trying it on had already faded, and she was eager to get home so she could hopefully have a chance to call Brick in between dinner and ballet. A glance at her phone showed he hadn't replied to her message with the photo of the dress.

The overall strap on her shoulder was suddenly bothering her, and after a very brief moment she unhooked it and let the bib fall fully down and the strap down her back, a moment later looping both straps through the belt loops on the garment so they wouldn't flop too much. As she looked at her reflection in the mirror she reconsidered the decision for a moment, noting just how much of her midriff was showing due to the high crop top and how low the overalls fell. But she shook her head and shouldered her purse and turned away from her reflection. Because despite herself, she couldn't even distract herself thinking about Tara's compliment because she was no longer able to hide the worry in her eyes.

----------------------

Bonnie shut off the car and then sank low into the leather seat, exhausted as she stared at the reflection of the golden sunset off her dash. She ran her mind back over the day's events, each recollection interrupted by the harsh, stabbing worry about Brick's text.

She felt a small measure of calm as she remembered how Tara had leaned down into the car to hug her when she had dropped her off at her home. Her friend had thanked her for a fun afternoon and promised to see her the next day with her usual bright smile and wave as she left.

Why couldn't Brick be more like Tara? Bonnie never had to worry that Tara wouldn't answer a text, or be less than honest about their friendship. If Tara was upset about something, Bonnie knew it in a moment from the look on her friend's face.

She also realized with sudden guilt, which she quickly shoved down, that she wasn't always quick to make amends when she and Tara got into disagreements. And yet, Tara...was still there.

She forced away the strange swirl of emotions in her chest and turned her thoughts to Brick again. Had she done something to upset him, and that's why he was distant? He wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, and he had always been extremely easy-going in high school. It was one of the things she liked about him actually... He did whatever she wanted, and she got to show off her man candy wherever she went.

She startled suddenly, her eyes seeking something to focus on as too many realizations hit her all at once. Could Brick be avoiding her because she only treated him like a tool? And...since when did she no longer want that with him, and want to be treated like an actual girlfriend?

Her mind was racing for answers, and when she looked at her reflection in the rear-view mirror she saw the truth in her own eyes. She had wanted more for a long time, but hadn't been giving Brick anything to let him know that.

Another strange mix of emotions hit her as she fought against the revelation she had just had. She didn't need a relationship. She didn't need to give and take, or to care about someone else's needs. Winners didn't need other people, after all.

Even as her head spoke the defiant thoughts, an image of Tara's smile and the memory of her hug before they parted that evening flew across her mind's eye. She sighed and slumped back in the seat again.

Who was she kidding?

She grimaced as she reached into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. Brick had said to call her... It was time to put herself out of her misery and stop living in a high school fantasy. If she really did...want more...she would have to give more.

She pressed the speed dial with an ironic grimace and held the phone to her ear. It connected after four rings.

"Hello?" He sounded confused, which made her stomach twist in unease.

"Hey Brick, baby," she greeted with a smile, though it didn't reach her eyes.

"Oh, hey," was the response in his usual smooth tone, but it was lacking the smile behind it.

"Did you get the photo of my gown?" she asked, avoiding any more difficult topic for the moment.

"Yeah, it's smokin'!" he said, and Bonnie felt some of the unease leave as she heard the smile in his voice. She also recalled that Ron Reiger had used that exact term to describe the dress, and her face fell.

"Do you need me to send you the address of the boutique to get your cummerbund and bow-tie dyed?" she continued in a hurry.

"Yeah about that..."

Bonnie felt her throat constrict and immediately tried to calm her breathing. Before she could speak, Brick continued.

"I don't think we should see each other anymore."

Bonnie's chest heaved as her breaths came more quickly.

"What... You...you...are breaking up with me?" Bonnie sputtered. They weren't the words she wanted to say, but they were the ones that came out.

"Yeah... So no hard feelings," Brick said. It sounded final, and Bonnie gripped her phone hard as she leaned forward in a panic.

"Wait! Can...can we talk about this?" she stammered.

"Talk...?" Brick sounded confused by the suggestion.

"Yeah, like...like...why?"

"Oh, well... I feel like since I went to college we've...grown apart?" Brick answered, still sounding confused. "And like...we didn't really know each other that well anyway."

"What do you mean?" Bonnie gasped, her instincts taking over again. "We talked almost every day for three years, we went out all the time, I even hung out at your house with your lame-o family!" Bonnie cringed at the instinctive insult she'd given and hurriedly backpedaled. "I mean..."

"Yeah, and like...that's just it," Brick continued in the voice she knew so well, sounding much more himself. "We did all those things and I don't...really know you."

Bonnie blinked several times, fighting the onset of tears. Her mind was a jumble of searching for excuses and counter-arguments, as well as the distracting interruptions of how she basically been treating Tara exactly the same way she had treated Brick.

"Well...then let's get to know each other," she finally said. She looked in the rear-view mirror at her stricken expression, and then her eyes fell to the reflection of the short crop top she was wearing. "And like...if you come over Saturday, my parents won't be home all weekend."

She had lowered her tone on the last, hoping to sound seductive. Her heart raced for fear with the implication she had just given him. That wasn't what she really wanted, but she was desperate.

"No thanks... It's just not gonna work between us. I'm sorry, but...it's over."

Bonnie clutched the phone tighter, breathing into the receiver as no words came while tears filled her eyes. A moment later the line disconnected, and she let a sob escape her lips as she listened to the dead air at the other end of the line.

She closed the phone and dropped it back in her purse, then wiping the tears from her eyes.

'Winners don't cry, winners don't cry...'

She tried desperately to force the tears away, but as she replayed the conversation with Brick in her mind they kept coming. She turned her gaze upward as she grabbed a tissue from the box in her center console, but she didn't dry her eyes yet.

The resounding finality of Brick's statement, 'it's over,' kept looping in her mind and causing a torment of indecision. There was a part of her that wanted to call him back and fight to keep him. She even wondered if driving to Lowerton for a salacious meeting would change his mind after all.

That idea made her heart pound in anxiety, and she recalled her earlier conversation with Tara. It wasn't what she wanted... But...she still wanted Brick.

She dried her eyes, and on that thought she shouldered her purse, and then carefully took her plastic-wrapped homecoming gown out of the trunk of the car. The sudden realization that she had no date for the dance started the tears anew, but she didn't stop and headed for the house.

'Winners don't quit...'

When she walked inside, the telltale sounds of quiet conversation told her that her family had already started dinner. She wiped her eyes once more with her free hand and held the gown up so that when she passed through the kitchen it would detract attention from her.

"Bonnie..." was the disappointed greeting from her mother when she turned the corner. Bonnie held the gown up higher.

"Sorry, I had to take Tara home. Her gown came in too."

"Ugh, why do you hang out with such fashion rejects..." Lonnie said.

Bonnie didn't even make eye contact. "For your information she got a hot pink dress this time. And even if she does need a little help with fashion, at least she's a real friend."

"Since when do you have real friends?" Connie said with a giggle.

"Girls," their father admonished.

"Bon-Bon, what are you wearing?" her mother asked, noticing her attire despite the gown she was holding up to block their view.

Jonny leaned forward on his elbows with a smirk and raised his eyebrows, and the three sisters glared at him.

"Gross!" they all said in unison.

"Just looking to see if she actually grew a pair or if it's still just socks," Jonny said.

"Like you've ever seen real ones," Lonnie countered.

"Right back at ya, Sis'," Jonny snickered.

"Ugh!"

"Like you've ever seen more than two brain cells," Connie continued the argument.

"Bonnie, surely you had something you could have worn a bra with..." her mother continued over the adult children's argument.

"I had the overall bib up all day," Bonnie said with a slight scoff, and then added in a mutter, "well, half of it."

Her slight embarrassment and annoyance with her family was overriding the hurt of losing Brick, for at least the present moment, and she hurried down the hall to her room to hang up her gown. After she had done so she leaned on her desk with a heavy sigh, staring down at the mountain of homework.

She looked up at herself in the mirror. Her face wasn't as puffy as she feared, and she hurried down the hall to the bathroom to wash off the tear stains. She made the mistake of replaying the conversation with Brick in her head again as she did so, and her tears flowed again. She permitted herself a few whimpering sobs this time, in hopes that doing so would help purge some of the emotional turmoil and let her get on with the evening.

A harsh knock at the door startled her, and she hurriedly splashed more water onto her face and added some soap to clean off her ruined makeup. She'd gone to ballet without it before, though she hadn't in awhile.

"Just a minute!" she called more loudly than was necessary.

"Take a chill pill, Bonnie," came her brother's mocking voice.

Bonnie felt a renewed embarrassment and annoyance about his earlier comments and scowled as she turned off the faucet and dried her face.

"There are other toilets in this house where you can sit and play video games, you know," she retorted.

"Yeah but I'll be bothered in those," he said matter-of-factly.

Bonnie checked her face again and after hanging the towel she opened the door with a sharp jerk.

"Whoa, fan the flame, Bon-Bon!"

"Don't call me that," she bit back as she stalked past him and back down the hall.

She listened to his snickering and the closing of the door as he escaped the family dinner for at least awhile, and she began changing for ballet. As she did so she told herself she wasn't going to think about Brick anymore. She could easily get a hot date for homecoming, and she could start work on that the very next day. All she needed to worry about for the rest of that night was dinner, ballet, and homework, in that order.

She forced her mind to think about the difficult routine she was going to need to rehearse that evening as she put on her pink tights, black leotard, and ballet slippers. After that she stood in front of the mirror, already feeling more composed for how elegant she looked in the attire that spoke of over a decade of hard work. The word 'regal' even crossed her mind as she pulled her hair up into a French twist.

She considered going back to dinner in just her ballet outfit, but considering Jonny's comments she threw on a baggy teal Club Banana logo t-shirt over her leotard. And then after checking that her pointe shoes were in her ballet bag, she dropped her purse inside and zipped the bag up and headed back out to face her family.

"Bonnie, you missed almost all of dinner," was her mother's sad greeting when she re-entered the kitchen.

Bonnie dropped her bag behind her chair and then grabbed a plate to serve herself some food.

"It was a busy day," she said, again more harshly than was warranted. She swallowed guiltily when her father looked at her over the rims of his glasses.

"Connie was just telling us about the seismology research project she's working on in college," her father said as he cleared his throat.

"Yeah," Lonnie interrupted, "and if we keep listening to it we're not going to have time to talk about my date tonight."

Bonnie noticed her bottle-blonde sister's attire for the first time—a too-tight strapless periwinkle mini-dress, with a sparkling crystal necklace and earrings to match. Her makeup was also overdone, which wasn't atypical.

"So who's this one?" Bonnie asked boredly, moving her spoon through the pasta salad as she sat at the table with her family.

As Lonnie described her 'hot date' who worked for a modeling agency, Bonnie's thoughts instantly drifted to her lack of a date for the homecoming dance, and then beyond. She considered her sister who dated anyone who might be able to give her a jump-start into a film or modeling career. Lonnie didn't seem interested in a serious relationship...

Bonnie realized all of a sudden that she herself was. She couldn't do what her sister did. And while she didn't yet know what she wanted to do after high school (another worrying thought that she would bury until she had no choice) she knew she didn't want to date guy after guy... She had never really enjoyed that. Which meant that apparently...she wanted something steady.

"Bonnie?"

She re-focused as she realized she was being spoken to—it was her turn to share about her day.

"Well I got my gown, not that anyone noticed," she began.

"It's lovely, dear," her mother said.

Bonnie tried not to frown at the aged-sounding appellation.

"Thank you, Mom," she said, tossing a glare at her sisters. "We also made a lot of progress on the cheer routine for regionals. It's too fussy, like all of Kim's routines, but I've got to admit...it'll be pretty cool when we've got it down."

"Have you given us that date for our calendars, Bonnie?" her father asked without looking up from his meal.

"Yes. And the ballet. And the homecoming game, and the dance so you don't schedule anything over it."

"Will Brick be taking you to the dance?"

Bonnie felt her entire frame tense, but she forced her face to calm and took a swallow of her food to both give herself a moment to compose herself and to force down the lump rising in her throat.

"No, he's busy," she lied easily. "Besides, I'll be voted homecoming queen so I should go with whoever is voted king."

"You? Queen?" Connie said, and she and Lonnie began to snicker. The sound of Jonny's deeper voice joining theirs was the family's cue that he had returned from his 'bathroom break' and Bonnie glared at all of her siblings in turn as her brother retook his seat.

"Well of course it will be me. Who else could it be?" Bonnie asked, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms indignantly.

"Probably that red-haired babe you can't get along with, what's her name?" Jonny asked.

"Ugh, that fashion don't dating the biggest loser in the school? As if!"

"Check the facts, Bonnie, she's a world-famous hero and she was on the cover of every fashion magazine that mattered two years ago," Connie said.

"Yeah. Don't you remember when we all wore Kim-style?" Lonnie added.

Bonnie scowled and let her frustration out in a growl. "That was before she had a loser boyfriend, though."

"Are people treating her any differently?" her father cut in.

Bonnie blinked as she considered. People had always liked Kim Possible, ever since middle school when they had met. And that had never changed. Kim wasn't part of the 'in-crowd' or any crowd really, but everyone still liked her and she was—Bonnie mentally groaned—friendly to everyone. And nothing at all had changed since she'd started dating her long-time dweeb of a best friend.

"No," Bonnie admitted.

"Probably gonna be her then," Jonny said, between two large bites. "She's a babe."

Bonnie's face felt hot in a mixture of embarrassment and rage as she saw her sisters nodding in agreement, but she said nothing. To argue would only reveal a weakness on her part.

"Whatever. I'm going to ballet," Bonnie said, dropping her spoon and reaching behind her for her bag.

"But Bon-Bon, you just got home," her mother protested.

"Yeah, and the performance is in two weeks! I want the extra warm up time. I'll see you later," she said over her shoulder as she departed.

She tuned out the continued protests and snippy comments from her siblings as she left the house and hurried down the dimly lit sidewalk to her car. The sun had set and the air had begun to cool, but it had a different feel than that of the morning chill. The morning had felt fresh, almost hopeful, and like she could take on the world. This chill was a descending weight, and felt like it would sap every last ounce of her strength.

Bonnie put up the roof of her convertible as suddenly every conversation she'd had that day began playing through her mind. And try as she might, she wasn't able to stop them.

The blaring of the radio on her drive to the theater couldn't stop them, nor could attempting to distract herself thinking about the challenging steps she would need to complete in the rehearsal that night. Instead, she heard a chaotic chorus of voices that seemed bent on the goal of severing every last thread of what made her...Bonnie.

----------------------

The voices continued throughout her warm-up stretches, and through the initial routine that Mlle. Catriona had the dancers perform in the warm-up room. Bonnie uncharacteristically stood in the back, t-shirt on as she moved mechanically through the familiar steps.

"You mean they actually found a dress to fit that shape?"

"Maybe if you'd lose a few pounds."

"I didn't think Flagg liked his babes with so much junk in the trunk."

Bonnie barely heard the accompaniment of the bright piano rhythms, so loud were the day's memories. Was she actually gaining weight? Was that why Brick had really lost interest in her?

"If anything, you're slimmer."

The recollection of Tara's words didn't do much to calm her fear that she might in fact be heavier. She looked at her distant reflection in the mirror from the back row of dancers, and then started to look around at her peers. She was definitely more shapely than the rest, but...she wasn't overweight; she was just the atypical curvy ballerina, in comparison. Still...she was suddenly glad she'd kept her t-shirt on.

Bonnie focused on Tara's encouragement and let that carry her through the rest of the warm-up until the class moved to the main stage to begin rehearsal of scenes for the upcoming performance of Swan Lake. An unusual self-consciousness hit her as she pulled off her t-shirt after tying on her pointe shoes, but she shook it off and held her head high. She had earned the principal role in the ballet and clearly, her weight wasn't an issue to her teacher or the director.

Across the stage, Matteo, who played the principal male role opposite to hers, grinned and waved at her. She smirked and waved back. Matteo was a winner like she was, and they worked well together. She had been very pleased when learning he had been cast in the role of the prince.

"I don't think we should see each other anymore."

Brick's words over the phone suddenly came back to her like the stab of a knife, and her smirk dissolved. She saw the confusion on Matteo's face, but she glanced away and half-listened as Mlle. Catriona gave some last minute direction before they would begin rehearsal of the pas de deux that ended Act III. Thankfully, she had no feeling that she might cry at this recollection. But the crushing weight and pain of loss were still strong, such that she realized suddenly she had placed a lot more value on the relationship with Brick than she had previously thought.

The rehearsal piano began again, and Bonnie began moving through the practiced steps.

"We did all those things and I don't really know you."

The memory of Brick's explanation for the break-up sent another stab of pain through her chest. How could he say he didn't know her? He knew her class schedule, and all of her extracurriculars...

Her thoughts stopped suddenly as she realized that Brick was right. They didn't...really know each other. They knew their schedules, what kinds of movies they liked, and the local school gossip, and that they both understood athletic discipline. But otherwise...

Bonnie swallowed nervously as she considered the boy—young man—who had taken seven years to graduate high school that she had dated on and off for three years. Brick Flagg...was hot. That was it. She didn't really know much about who he was. That suddenly concerned her as she looked around at the other dancers on the stage. Some of them she knew more about than even the girls on the cheer squad. Yes, with the cheerleaders she could gossip. But the ballerinas talked more about real life—their jobs, their plans for after high school, their families... Some were even already in college.

Bonnie moved to the wings of the stage, catching her breath as the coda of the dance approached. Matteo's leaps were majestic, and Bonnie smiled as she watched the fellow athlete who was very attractive—just not in the bulky way that most appealed to her—and who she realized she also knew better than she knew Brick. She didn't even know what Brick was studying... But Matteo was preparing to audition for the New York Ballet. And as a hobby, he did woodworking.

She had no idea what Brick's hobbies were, or if he even had any.

"It's over."

There was a greater finality as she replayed Brick's words in her mind again, and it was with great annoyance she realized the tears were beginning to flow. She almost missed her cue as the piano changed, but she set her jaw and held her head high as she retook the stage.

She found her mark and set up for the fouettes. She had managed twenty-seven the last time and was hoping to make it an even twenty eight this time. She heard the anacrusis of the music and began to spin, executing the practiced technique with skill. But as she spun, blurred images of faces watching her suddenly brought the fears back to her mind.

Was she too heavy? Did the turns look awkward as a result? Did the other ballerinas gossip about her when she wasn't there, the way she gossiped about each cheerleader in turn when they weren't around?

"Since when do you have real friends?"

The memory pushed her out of the intense focus that her spin required, and with a small cry, Bonnie fell out of her eleventh fouette. She quickly moved back to the mark and resumed, not wanting to stop because it would only bring more negative attention. She caught just a glimpse of surprised faces and heard gasps over the piano before she resumed the turns, counting them even though there was no point in her desperate search for distraction.

She may have overheard the other dancers talking about their lives over the years...but she didn't really tell them about her own. They weren't her friends anymore than anyone at school was.

As she finished the last fouette—twenty-one—she posed and smiled confidently despite the tear rolling down her cheek. She didn't look at Matteo as she passed him while he began his solo.

"You? Queen?"

Her siblings were right. Who would vote for her anyway? She talked badly about those she called 'friends' to everyone, and she didn't even acknowledge people like Reiger who had been in her class since middle school. She had started faltering in cheer practice, which never happened. And now she was even failing as the star of the ballet.

It was with this swirl of dark thoughts that she began the final sequence with Matteo, who broke character to give her a concerned look as her tears continued to flow. When finally the piano held the last chord Bonnie smirked as her character required, and posed while breathing through her teeth, trying to calm down.

"Are you okay?" Matteo asked quietly through the small wave of applause their fellow students gave.

Bonnie held her smile and allowed the eye contact, which only had the tears flowing more.

The moment the music stopped and the director began giving commentary, Bonnie interrupted with a hurried, "Excuse me," as she began rushing from the stage. The murmurs that followed made her feel sick, and none more than one of the other girls commenting: "Maybe she's going to call Brick."

----------------------

The rest of the rehearsal had gone better. Bonnie had dried her tears and shoved the emotions away with her mantra of 'winners don't cry' and had channeled all of her focus and energy into making up for the earlier mistake and emotional slip. People acting differently toward her the rest of the night had only driven her further, and while she might not have given the most artistic performance, technically, she was flawless.

She had left the theater with that small measure of control giving her a touch of strength, and she maintained that feeling for the entire drive home. But once she had parked in the darkened driveway and saw fewer lights on in her family's home, she felt the roiling of emotions start to return.

She shouldered her ballet bag and silently moved up the walk to the house, hoping that everyone had retired to their respective hobbies for the evening. And Lonnie of course was on a date and wouldn't be home for hours. All Bonnie wanted to do was take a shower and forget the horrible day.

Thankfully, she moved quietly enough that her brother—playing video games on the big screen now, since her parents had gone to bed early due to their flight the next day—was unaware of her presence. And as she passed by Connie's room, she heard her older sister gossiping on the phone.

When Bonnie closed her own bedroom door she felt a huge relief come over her at the same time a weight fell. She barely had the strength to pull her purse out of her ballet bag, and her phone of that before dropping the former on the floor and flopping on the bed with the latter.

She let herself rest for just a moment, her muscles tired from their exertion throughout the day and night, and then she sat up intending to get ready for a shower. But her gaze fell upon the stack of books and homework on her desk.

"Unghh..." she groaned aloud, flopping down on her bed again and dropping her forearm over her eyes and plunging her vision into darkness. She began mentally calculating how long it would take to shower and then tallying how many assignments she had due the next day.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a buzz from her phone which was still on silent from rehearsal. She flipped it open, her chest constricting at the thought it might be Brick.

It wasn't.

It was just a silly update from Stoppable's blog. Bonnie sneered in annoyance and almost dropped the phone, when she saw a comment alert pop up on the new post. It was Tara.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she opened up the post to actually read it.

*Drakken and Shego seen dining casually at Croutons. Is it a business meeting or a romantic interlude?*

Bonnie felt a pang as she looked at the photo that Stoppable or someone had snapped of the villain duo... Was Stoppable actually following them for this silly obsession?

She scrolled down to read Tara's comment which was full of emoticons and hearts, enthusiastic about the growing evidence that the pair might be romantically involved. The pang Bonnie felt before grew stronger. Even the villains that Possible fought were going to find their happy ending. While her relationship-which-wasn't had just ended.

With a heavy sigh and a few yawns, Bonnie changed into her pajamas and decided to forego the shower for the evening. It would only make her more tired, and she had a couple of hours of homework at least. And it was already past nine o' clock.

She moved to her desk and sat down, arranging her books in the order in which she wanted to tackle the assignments. Another buzz from her phone caught her attention, and she glanced at it to see that a debate had sprung up on Stoppable's blog about the blue and green-skinned villains. It seemed even Kim was weighing in, in favor of the two being together, which thrilled Tara.

Bonnie considered her friend again, who she'd given so little time to throughout senior year. And who despite that and her general careless and casual treatment of her...was perhaps the only real friend she had.

An emotional tug of war began within Bonnie then, which she finally ceded to as she flipped to her messages and typed a quick text to Tara.

*Thanks for coming with me today. I'm going to be up late finishing homework if you want to join me in snore-ville.*

She sent the text and felt the emotions in her chest start to calm. She looked in the mirror and sighed as she felt some of the tension leave her shoulders.

'Winners never quit.'

Her phone began buzzing with the notification of a call. On the screen was Tara's name, and Bonnie smiled.

----------------------

Days Later...

Bonnie stood on the football field and adjusted her black skirt, knowing she looked perfect, but unable to get Kim's and Monique's words out of her head. So strong was the swirl of nerves building in her stomach that she completely missed Tara's wave of encouragement from the sidelines.

"In case you didn't notice, now Kim is the one dating the star of the football team."

"Ron has broken more school records than Brick ever did."

Bonnie's siblings had been right... In the days that had followed her picking up her gown from the store with Tara, all the buzz around school was that Kim was the one slated to win the title. Bonnie tried to tell herself she didn't care, but the buzz had been equally clear: Ron Stoppable was expected to win king.

Bonnie tried to ignore what that would mean for her. Still dateless, humiliated, and no longer the center of attention...anywhere. The senior table in the cafeteria was meaningless, since they were all seniors. And the only people who cared anyway were brainless jocks, as it turned out. She was an equal with Kim on the cheer squad, but since they had taken roles as co-captains it was becoming very clear who was in fact more skilled between them at the sport, and it wasn't Bonnie. She was even slipping in ballet, and still wondered if her curves and weight might be an issue. And of course, ever since Kim had...saved the world...from those Bueno Nacho toys, everyone treated the red-head exactly like who she was: a hero.

While Bonnie herself was ignored and forgotten.

Soon Mr. Barkin would announce Kim and Ron as the Middleton High homecoming king and queen, and they would get even more attention. While for the remainder of Bonnie's senior year she would fade into obscurity. But without all of the things that cheer and ballet and Brick's status had brought to her...was she still a winner? Who...who was she?

"This year we replaced our old-fashioned paper ballots with our own state of the art electronic voting system, which snagged second place for Ron Reiger in the Tri-City science fair."

Bonnie absorbed Mr. Barkin's words and in a flash an idea struck her about how to get her identity back.

Ron Reiger was seated near the sideline with his whatever-device that everyone had used to vote for king and queen. Bonnie ran out of the row of nominees into Reiger's line of sight, who looked at her with the same leer he had back at the boutique. It turned her stomach, but Bonnie ignored it to give him a flirty smile and a 'call me' gesture. Reiger's leer grew, and after giving her a knowing smile he typed something into his device and a new paper printed out.

Bonnie sighed in nervous satisfaction as she hurried back to her place near Kim. She might not be the best cheerleader. She might not even be the best ballerina or best student anymore. She might have lost her boyfriend. She might be...all alone... But she was going to be homecoming queen. And once she was, she could start getting her identity back.

Because Bonnie Rockwaller was a winner, and she always would be.

[lovelyirony]

Title: I wish i could forget you

Tony Stark was not supposed to be in the car when Howard and Maria Stark attended a Christmas holiday party for another company. In fact, Hydra had wanted him to stay home. 

Unfortunately, Tony had ticked off Howard a bit too much, and so here he was in a tuxedo that was a bit too big, uncomfortably shiny shoes, and a temper that was close to blowing. 

Thank god they were almost home. 

When a car crashes, one almost can’t believe it. Tony can see the outside blurring, and he can hear glass crunching, and he hears things that he really doesn’t want to hear. He is fairly sure that Maria screamed. 

A metal arm. 

Huh. 

Well, not the most typical. He also doesn’t think that the man knows he’s here. 

Howard and Maria Stark are killed. Tony feels like shit because he couldn’t do anything. His forehead is bleeding and he didn’t want to move out of fear for himself, which seems selfish, but also maybe a survival instinct? 

God, his bow-tie is still constricting air flow. 

Once the man turns, Tony realizes that he wasn’t the target. They probably had no idea he was in the car, whoever “they” were. 

He gets out of the car. The car door creaks, and the man whips around. 

His eyes widen. 

“You--what?” 

The voice is surprisingly American. 

Surprisingly? He’s not sure why it’s surprising, it’s not like an American can’t kill just look at history, but still, Kind of surprising. 

"What, wasn’t supposed to be here?” Tony rasps out. He realizes now that he’s basically sent himself a death sentence as the man surges forward. 

“What are you doing here?” 

His eyes are piercing. Also very, very familiar with some photographs that Peggy has on her mantle and her desk. 

James “Bucky” Barnes. Son of a bitch. 

“What are you doing alive?” Tony asks. “I thought you were lost in a ravine in Europe somewhere.” 

“What--huh?” 

“Ravine. In Europe. You know who you are, right? Is this some kind of sick...what did they do to you?” 

“I do not know what you are talking about.” 

His eyes get cold again. 

“Who are you?” 

“I am the Asset.” 

It is now that Tony realizes that every single shitty sci-fi book is probably right, and his disdain of “wacky science” and “magic” have all been for nothing, because here is Bucky Barnes, who apparently has no idea who he is. 

Then Tony gets knocked on his ass. His body slams against the icy road, and Barnes is rushing towards a motorcycle. 

And he’s alone. He can’t breathe, all the wind knocked out of his chest. He thinks he broke a couple of ribs. 

- 

No one believes him. At all. SHIELD brushes it aside. 

“There’s no way Barnes could be alive. You were probably just seeing things,” they tell him. “Would you like us to find you a therapist?” 

“No,” Tony says, and they ask why. He laughs, sipping on his water. “SHIELD has so much loyalty to itself, I’m afraid I’d be compromised.” 

“Therapists aren’t supposed to divulge any information,” Nick Fury adds carefully. “And we’re a secret-keeping bunch. Nothing goes out that comes in.” 

“Unless, of course, it’s necessary,” Tony drawls, staring at Fury. God, the leather outfit...that’s weird. “Then I’m out in the open, Nicky. And what fun is that unless I get to show off an outfit in full-coverage?” 

“...I’ll have an agent escort you home. We’ll have guards overnight.” 

“Don’t bother.” 

“And why is that? Think you can handle it by yourself?” 

“Fury, my family has made a career out of thinking a lot of things. You’re not being as detrimental as you think.” 

He finger-waves, grinning and winking at agents on the way out. 

- 

Now comes paranoia. This is welcome, actually, because it’s allowing him to work up new security measures and hack into various security cameras around the world to see if he can find Barnes. 

It’s like he’s a ghost. And fuck, maybe Fury was right. Tony doesn’t like that, but that may be it. 

Merry fucking Christmas. 

- 

Years go by, and Tony keeps a tiny ear to any news about mysterious deaths that can’t be explained. A man that glows in lamp-light, has no identity. He’s not sure if it could be Barnes. God knows he’s no longer seventeen, and Barnes--it if it was Barnes--would be way older. He should’ve been an old man in 1991, but he wasn’t. 

It kind of reminds him of the conspiracy theory that Walt Disney was kept cryogenically frozen, which is just ridiculous, because as far as he’s concerned, you’d need a bit more to you than just regular skin and bones. 

And this is where it hits him. 

Barnes was experimented on when he was captured by Hydra. Peggy told him that Rogers told her that he was repeating his dog tag number over and over, as if someone was trying to take him over. 

Yeah, you’d need a bit more. 

Like a fucking super soldier serum. 

- 

This then delves into Tony realizing that if Barnes is flash-frozen, then...well, could Rogers have survived? He always thought his dad was crazy, but a broken clock is right twice a week or however the hell that saying goes. He never used it, he wasn’t a broken clock. 

(He was broken, but he’s not going to compare himself to a clock. Perhaps  Model-T.) 

- 

They find Rogers. Tony realizes Howard did his math completely wrong for years, and probably never let anyone look at it because he was a World Super Genius. And a Colossal Dick. 

Steve Rogers is one tough cookie to crack. Tony chips off some of the ice and puts it in a glass of scotch. 

“Do you really think that’s the most appropriate thing to do?” Phil Coulson asks. 

He’s shocked, but mainly because Tony has seen his Cap collection, and that man has so many limited edition cards and lunchboxes that it’s a bit crazy. But at least he knows how to decorate with it and not have it look like an absolute nutjob swept into his house and did it all in red-white-and-blue. 

“Phil, my darling, when have I ever done anything the appropriate way?” Tony asks. He stares at the face that’s emerging out of the ice. “Besides, what else are you going to do with this ice, hm? Besides melt it all off?” 

Steve is a miracle. Every scientist on earth wants to poke and prod at him. 

Tony breaks him out of SHIELD in a week, because he swears to shit if one more scientist asks to take blood samples “to see how going under Arctic temperatures affects the bloodstream” (and also take DNA for cloning) he’s going to lose it. 

Fury yells at him for two hours. 

Steve flips Fury off from the couch, where he’s been channel-surfing for the better part of three hours. 

“You’ve already corrupted him,” Fury scowls. “Rogers, we need to talk--” 

“He’s retired,” Tony says. 

(Steve is not, technically. Hasn’t said anything. But Tony is putting him on mandatory retirement for at least a year.) 

“What’s...what the ever-loving fuck is that?” Steve asks. 

An infomercial. For an automated chair. Mostly used for old people. 

Tony grins. 

“You wanna see how fast I can launch you out of one?” 

“I’m going to say yes. Professionally.” 

Ten miles an hour, and Steve goes flying across the room into a pile of pillows. 

It’s not the end-all solution. God knows Steve calls him “Howard” and asks where a lot of nasty food is, and sometimes can’t tell the difference between what his brain is seeing and what is actually there. 

But Tony gets him help. And Steve goes to art school. 

It’s all very funny, actually. Steve rants about “modern art” and how “if he could kill any concept it would be abstract expressionism, what the fuck.” 

Tony buys and then donates a Rothko in his honor. 

Steve fumes, but finds it hilarious. 

Then, there’s the attack on New York. 

Norse god of mischief decides to end New York, blah blah blah. 

Captain America reappears, everyone loses their shit, and Tony almost dies. 

Then he gets four other roomies besides Steve, and he has to make a chore chart. Ugh. 

- 

Barnes reappears in France. Tony gets a fairly good image, and Natasha stills. 

“You know about Winter Soldier?” 

“Barnes? Yeah.” 

“You know who he is?” 

“James Barnes. At least, I think. He tried to kill me, wasn’t very successful at it.” 

Steve overhears. 

This leads to a chain of events that ends in Steve not coming to family dinner because he’d rather sit in his room and listen to Green Day or Glenn Miller or whatever the hell gets him even more upset. 

“Listen, Steve, I’m sorry. But up until this picture? I was only about sixty percent sure I wasn’t full of beans.” 

“Why is that the phrase you use?” 

“What, full of beans? Bruce says I have to work on my cursing. Apparently, children are impressionable. Who knew?” 

It’s not a total success. Steve still doesn’t like that Tony didn’t outright tell him, but Tony isn’t going to tell Steve that he has the mental stability of a single cashew. 

So begins the hunt for Barnes. Which actually isn’t too bad. 

He’s in DC. Not for any political clean-up, unfortunately. He’s trying to kill Fury. Tony doesn’t know why, at least until he looks up Pierce, who’s technically, mostly retired from SHIELD. 

And yet still uses most resources that technically? He needs more than one authorization from multiple people. 

God, people are getting bad at covering their tracks. Used to be harder to catch and see if someone was doing dirty deals. 

(Okay, not like he can talk because Obie was...well, no use in discussing that now. He needs to focus.) 

Nat and Steve are bad at lying. This kind of surprises him, because Steve is usually a successful liar. He’s convinced Clint that it’s not him who keeps eating his peanut-butter-fudge ice cream, but Thor. 

And Natasha used to be Natalie Rushman. Then again, Tony was poisoned during that one, so that might just be on him. 

-

Helicarriers go in the water. 

Tony’s working on making sure most of the information doesn’t reach the general public, although he can’t stop it all. 

Barnes falls off the face of the earth, and Steve wants to go on another treasure hunt. 

“Let him come to us, or figure himself out.” 

“This isn’t a college kid going backpacking in Europe for a year,” Nat snaps. “He’s...you know who he is, who he was, and what he can do.” 

“Counterpoint: we don’t know if he secretly really wanted to see traditional decoration of Ukrainian Easter eggs,” Tony says. “God knows that I want to learn more about that.” 

“Is everything a joke to you?” 

"Only on federally mandated holidays,” Tony says with a shrug. “But let him be. Steve, it’s one thing that he didn’t kill you. It’s another thing that he hauled you up from the Potomac. I’m not sure I would’ve done that because who goes up alone to a helicarrier?” 

“Historically nobody,” Natasha says. “Most people don’t have any helicarriers.” 

“God, this situation sucks,” Tony says. “What if. We potentially. Ignore all of it and have spinach and artichoke dip? Hm?” 

“With toasted bread?” 

“I’m not an animal, Steve.” 

“Your penchant for four a.m. coffee while you don’t realize you’re singing songs from the seventies says otherwise,” he responds. 

“Well well well, if it isn’t the punishment of you getting the aux taken away for a week,” Tony taunts. 

“Oh, come on!” Steve whines. 

“Nope, just you having to listen to more of Bruce’s questionable tastes.” 

“Fuck.” 

- 

Barnes comes stateside. The only reason Tony knows this is because Jarvis says that he may have spotted Barnes, but he’s not sure. 

“J, you’re the most advanced system in the world, not to mention my son, and you like to hack into the Pentagon for funsies.” 

“All of that could not have prepared me for this.” 

Barnes is wearing a neon green tank top that is advertising Coco Beach in Florida. 

“Can I laugh? Or is that sad?” 

“Multitask, Sir.” 

“Oh, true.” 

- 

Barnes is not in New York. Tony has to near-about put an electric fence around the whole state so that Steve doesn’t go on a road trip. 

Hell, Tony doesn’t even trust him to go to coffee alone, but that’s a bit much. 

“We have to wait,” Tony says. 

Sam Wilson is a godsend. Also the funniest man Tony knows. 

He is also emotionally healthy and very perceptive, so he has been noticing that Tony is nervous. 

Because how do you face the man who killed your parents? Technically? 

“Are you talking to your therapist?” Sam asks. “Just thinking you should.” 

“Sam, we’re working on my issues from 2007. Believe it or not, it will be taking a full year.” 

“I don’t like that I can never tell if you’re serious.” 

“I know you remember the tabloids from 2007, I wrote a mesh vest. Clearly, I need so much help.” 

Sam snorts. 

“Maybe. Hey, I’ll catch you later. Clint and I are gonna go try and find some questionable shirts to crop.” 

“Did his little protege convince you? Bishop, right?” 

“Kate, yeah. She’s convinced our public image will go viral or something. Good luck with helping Steve and Nat with your super-soldier hunt.” 

“Thanks. Let me know if you find a shirt with my face on it. I want it.” 

Sam snorts. 

“Will do.” 

- 

Bucky Barnes comes to New York in early May. The springtime is slowly but surely fading off, sun approaching more and more. Tony is enjoying coffee on a veranda, and then suddenly his waiter is nowhere to be found and he’s not entirely sure if his visitor takes credit or debit. 

“Can I help you?” 

“Maybe. Depends on if you’re gonna kill me or not.” 

“I think Steve would be a bit broken up about it.” 

“Do you care what he thinks?” 

“On this situation? Yes. When it comes to culinary choices? No.” 

There’s a ghost of a smile on his face. Tony’s trying extremely hard not to remember shattered glass and a motorcycle on ice. 

“Can we, uh, table this conversation? For later. Espresso and all that, plus the added bonus of our shared history, so...” 

“Shared history?” 

“You don’t remember?” Tony asks. Bucky shakes his head. “Ah. Then this is truly a comedy of errors. Maybe. Um. Listen, I, uh...I gotta go. You need to talk to Nat or Steve or hell, maybe even Thor. Is Thor a good option?” 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

“Barnes, I can’t exactly face you right now.” 

And then he jumps off a balcony. 

A fucking balcony. 

Jesus H. Christ, his therapist is gonna be so excited for their next session. 

The suit wraps itself around him, and he can finally breathe, and he’s thinking about calling Pepper and see if she would like to schedule him a vacation for maybe anywhere but New York and Iowa. 

“Why not Iowa?” Pepper asks. “They have good antique stores. I’ve gotten quite a few good finds for clothes.” 

“I can do shopping retail literally anywhere else, absolutely not.” 

“Spoilsport. Steve know you’re leaving?” 

“I didn’t even really tell Steve what happened with my parents.” 

“Oh, your therapist called. She sounded concerned, but also intrigued.” 

“It’s because Sally almost became an employee of NASA and still has a soft spot for aerodynamics.” 

“What exactly did you do when faced with Barnes?” 

“Check the front tabloid page tomorrow, just tell everyone I’m out of town.” 

“Got it. And Tony?” 

Her voice is soft. 

“Yes, dear?” 

He can feel her rolling her eyes. Affectionately, of course, but rolling all the same. 

“Be safe, and come back. You know Rhodey and I miss you.” 

“I miss you too.” 

- 

A week is spent in Malibu. He really is thinking about selling this place. But for now, it suffices. 

Steve texts him. 

bucky’s back. holy shit 

be back in a week. radio silence. 

got it. no more messages from me. thor tells me to tell you that he broke the sink 

:(((( 

And that’s it. He’s sitting in the house for a week, has already called Sally once and explained how his suit works, and then listened to her talk about how “his reliance on the suit to help him escape unfavorable situations is not exactly the healthiest but also none of my clients have had to face someone who is of weird standing.” 

It’s no secret that Tony doesn’t like Howard Stark. Who would’ve liked that sorry excuse for a father, a man who was so cold-hearted the Arctic looked like a tropical paradise? 

Maria was...Maria was different. 

She wasn’t a good mother. No, she was never a good mother. But she tried, and she didn’t deserve her fate. 

And then there was the question of Bucky Barnes. Who wasn’t Bucky when he was there, but still so damn recognizable. 

It’s kind of like when there’s a movie about a famous person, and another person plays them. Like Tom Hanks, essentially. Bucky played whoever the fuck they get Tom Hanks to play and it’s similar: you see the resemblance, but it’s not it. 

So yeah. 

There’s also the little tidbit that things get complicated when you involve personal feelings and rationality, and really? Tony misses New York. A lot. And he’s not going to let someone else overtake his life just because he’s uncomfortable. 

So he flies back to New York. 

- 

He’s in a bad way, Barnes is. 

“He remembered you,” Steve says. “What he did.” 

“Ah, there’s that.” 

“He doesn’t have to be here,” Natasha says. “I have a couple of SHIELD safe houses to choose from.” 

“None would be adequate to house something like me,” comes the response. 

Barnes looks remarkably shitty, as if he hasn’t slept in eighty years. And maybe he hasn’t. 

“Jail would be more fitting.” 

Tony rolls his eyes. 

“You are literally the most dramatic person ever, and Bruce threatened to take over the government because Thor ate the last croissant. Put those on the grocery list, Steve

“We’re not gonna throw you in jail,” he continues on. “Not because you happened to be used as a goddamned Swiss army knife. I have issues, sure, but I’m not going to be going all Hannibal Lecter or whatever.” 

“Who the hell is that?” 

“Cannibal. I realized that that’s a terrible comparison, please forgive me.” 

“Why a cannibal?” 

“Couldn’t think of anything else but Anthony Hopkins, the actor. My mistake. Point is, we’re gonna have to go through some channels, and I’m introducing you to BARF, as well as a new person who’s gonna rock your world.” 

“I’m pretty much well-acquainted with vomit.” 

“No, not that,” Tony says. “Although we can cover that through my 2005 edition of partying if we really wanna dig up some old magazine interviews. No, I’m introducing you to something that’s going to change your life.” 

-

After that, Tony doesn’t have much to do with Bucky’s life. 

He serves as a permanent guilt trip, nothing says “well, shit” much like being a permanent guilt trip. 

Sally tells him that they should talk it out. Do all that “and how do you feel?” questioning that makes his skin crawl and his eyes ascend to the ceiling. 

I mean yeah, they share a living space. Tony has seen Bucky laugh and smile with Sam, talk with Bruce about a really interesting article about regeneration of plant cells or whatever, and Bucky enjoys videochatting with Wakandan royalty. 

(It also helps that Shuri is blunt as ever, but so blisteringly smart. He’s reading her paper on regeneration of nanotechnology, and it just...it’s the Pieta of research, that paper.) 

But he never speaks to Bucky. Well, he does. But it’s more along the lines of “hey Barnes” and “how are you?” which aren’t exactly the Most Thought Provoking Statements Ever Made. 

Summer comes swiftly, and about near with a vengeance. Tony’s dealing with a heat wave and trying to figure out if going outside is even worth it, and then he and Bucky are alone in the kitchen. 

Tony was debating getting a couple of popsicles from the freezer. Bucky is considering sabotaging Clint’s smoothie that was supposed to be special for tonight, but that he’ll most likely forget. 

“Hey,” Bucky says. “Um, can we talk?” 

Shit. 

He’s been avoiding this, officially, for a month. Potentially more if you’re going to count a few choice events that have been brought up by his psyche. 

“Sure thing, buttercup. What are we talking about. Economy, world crises, the great debate on financial advice?” 

“Isn’t the third thing just the economy?” 

“We can break it down over coffee.” 

“Mm, maybe another time. No, I’m talking about us. About how I--I kind of ruined your life.” 

Tony blinks. 

“You didn’t ruin my life. If my life was ruined you’d be hit with so many lawsuits that I could make the rest of your life look like the third circle of Hell, or wherever it is that people go nowadays in Dante’s eyes. No, you didn’t ruin my life.” 

“I still killed your parents.” 

“If you hadn’t, someone else would’ve. Believe me, there were about fifteen others in line. Sometimes, myself included.” 

“You can’t not take me seriously,” Bucky stresses. “I still did a terrible thing. I just want to make sure you know that you’re being too kind.” 

“I most certainly am not,” Tony says. “Being too kind would have me feeding you grapes.” 

Bucky’s face blanks. 

“Don’t. I...I don’t wanna take advantage of your hospitality. I don’t want to remind you of what happened.” 

“You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t wanted,” Tony says. “Believe me. And if you want to leave, you’re free to leave. I don’t want to make you feel like you need to stay here.” 

“I...I want to make it up to you.” 

“Then use BARF and review it,” Tony says. “I’m serious. I need user feedback, and you’re the best candidate for it. Also, please try to convince Steve to wear neon yellow. I just want to see if he’ll do it.” 

- 

Steve wears neon yellow. Tony laughs so hard he cries. 

Bucky smiles. 

It’s a nice smile, really. It’s wide and happy and wow. That’s all worth it. 

And then BARF. Bucky just gives user feedback, nothing else. Tony doesn’t want to know anything else, but they start talking more. 

Tony finds out that Bucky’s been doing crosswords to catch up on current events, and he’s bought taped recordings of World Series games. 

He loves antique stores. He visits them and brings home little trinkets that he remembers in his own house, or what he remembered. He watched old commercials from the fifties and sixties, laughed as he remembered the Sears catalogs that would come in the mail. 

“Me an’ my sisters would beg my mom for new clothes from the catalog, and she never would. Always sewed our pants and skirts so damn well, I probably could’ve used them for the next ten years.”  

Tony laughs. 

“Well, I can’t promise I can sew. But I could give you some armor that could last you twenty years, if you want. Steve told me you’re thinking about doing some distance missions.” 

“Just observation, no armor required.” 

“Sometimes it’s the simple missions that get the worst hits,” Tony says. “Believe me, I know how it goes. So, do you want some armor?” 

Bucky smiles. 

“Sure.” 

“I’ll need feedback.” 

“I’ll give it all I’ve got.” 

- 

Bucky is a goddamned dream to design for. He knows exactly what he needs, what areas are most likely to be pierced, and also has a flair for the dramatic: he requests an Iron Man helmet be embroidered on the back. 

“You’re really just trying to be sweet on me, aren’t you?” Tony teases. 

“My master plan to gain your fortune,” Bucky teases right back. “I’ll waste it all on champagne pools and the worst-looking but most expensive shoes I can find.” 

Tony laughs. 

“Sugar, that’d be incredible if you could spend all of my money on that. I’d commend you.” 

Bucky smiles, and it shouldn’t be as nice of a smile as it is, but here Tony is with his opinions and his concerning thought that maybe he wants to see more of Bucky. 

- 

In the morning, there begins a routine. Tony is always up at eight o’clock. It’s a rare lull in Avenger-morning-routines: Nat, Steve, and Bruce are all done, and Thor and Clint won’t be in until ten o’clock at the earliest. 

(What can he say? Thor’s a god and Clint...well. He needs a lot of beauty sleep.) 

Tony makes coffee, and Bucky makes them both breakfast. Says that officially, it’s to test and make sure that his prosthetic is still performing under optimal conditions. 

(They both know that’s not it.) 

Tony always says he pours too much water, makes enough for two cups. 

- 

Steve calls them out on it. 

“You two are being weird,” he says. “And not like Thor and Bruce trying to reenact that one show about ghosts and unsolved things.” 

“That’s their form of courtship, don’t be fucking rude,” Clint remarks. Natasha snorts. 

“What, us being weird?” Tony asks, pouring a bit more coffee into Bucky’s mug. He always uses too much creamer and then won’t finish his coffee unless there’s more. “Why do you say that?” 

“It’s because you both do couple shit,” Bruce says, breezing into the kitchen. “Also, Steve, lovely to see that you have volunteered to be the next guest on Avengers: Unsolved. We’re planning on using you as a guilt-trip in order to access files about aliens.” 

“Truth will be found!” Thor adds. “But also, yes. Bucky, I thought you were taking him on a date to the art museum on Saturday.” 

Bucky turns red. So does Tony. It really is quite inconvenient. 

“I mean, we could go on a date there,” Tony says. “If you’re okay with that.” 

“You’re doing this in public?” Natasha asks, eyebrows raised. “Hm. Would not have called that.” 

“You owe me fifteen dollars,” Bucky says. “Not you Tony, quit looking at me like that. Yes, it will be a date on Saturday, I’ll wear a nice shirt. Nat said that I couldn’t do anything that surprised her.” 

“Technically, Tony surprised me.” 

“I thought dates were mutual events, hm? Fifteen dollars. I’ll use it to buy the best bouquet in New York.” 

“The best bouquet costs over a thousand dollars,” Thor answers. 

“Not questioning how you know that, but I’m scared of you,” Bucky says. “Then I will get the best fifteen-dollar-bouquet in New York.” 

Tony snorts, smiling. 

“I guess I’ll spray a bit of my perfume on my pillow then, soldier.” 

“I’ll pick you up at noon sharp,” Bucky says, grinning. He finishes his coffee. “We’ll make fun of Steve’s art exhibit together.” 

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Bite The Hand That Feeds

Summary: When the reader is kidnapped by an Alpha, she thinks that’s her biggest problem to deal with but she soon learns how wrong she is...

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x reader

Square: Alpha/Omega

Word Count: 12,300ish

Rating: Mature (language, death, kidnapping, fires, violence, angst, injury (not the happiest fic there ever was, that’s for sure))

A/N: Written for @spnabobingo​​

_____

A large smack to the back of your head made you flash your eyes open. It was dark, your hands behind you, secured with some kind of leather restraints. That wasn’t good. Swallowing hard, you felt the gag in your mouth, a strip of thick fabric that covered your lips and was tied taught at the back of your head. Your feet felt bound but it was more likely rope or a ziptie based on the give. Your nose brushed against fabric every so often and the barely there taillights told you not only were you in the back of a trunk, there was also a hood on your head.

You took a deep breath through your nostrils, trying to get your bearings when you realized the car wasn’t moving anymore. A loud creek echoed in the chamber as cool night air hit you. The trunk was open and someone was staring down at you.

It couldn’t have been a person. You were a hunter. Too well trained for that and monsters didn’t exactly kidnap people. Neither did the other one’s but the leather restraints should have been the dead give away.

“Move,” said a loud Alpha’s voice. You stayed still. They weren’t common and they weren’t known for their kindness. If he knew you were a hunter, you were as good as dead.

He grabbed your arm and yanked you up easily, far more easily than any human man could. He was going to be harder to get away from than you thought.

You waited until he was picking you up before you pulled the knife out of your boot and sliced behind you. You cut loose your feet and slashed with it as best you could with arms behind you. The Alpha hissed and you knew you got him. You managed to shake the hood off and had just about made a break for it when the restraints on your wrists burned and you dropped to your knees.

“Hunter,” he growled, kicking the knife out of your hands and pulling the hood back on you before you even got a look at him. 

He was Alpha so he had to be big. He ripped off your boots, yanking you to your socked feet and walking you roughly across some kind of stone driveway. You went up a few steps, almost trying for a break away again when he paused at a door but the pain in the restraints started to tingle and you stopped, the pain going away.

He’d infused them with magic.

Oh you were so fucked.

He yanked you through a door and on some kind of wood floor, turning a corner before he pushed you and you fell back on a mattress.

You growled as he ripped off the hood. No way were you letting him do that without a fight. The room was dim but he was very handsome, perfectly human looking but you knew the difference, knew what he was.

He narrowed his green eyes at you, reaching for the gag but you backed up further on the bed.

“We’re in the middle of fucking nowhere, no thanks to your kind, so I wouldn’t bother screaming if I were you,” he said. It took everything in you not to bite him right then and there but you held back as he tugged the gag down. “Turn around.”

“You first,” you said. He stared at you, your wrists starting to hurt. “Neat trick. You think that-”

You went wide eyed, a scream ready to erupt from your throat from the pain that had shot through you before it had quickly disappeared.

“Turn. Around.”

You got up to your knees but showed him your back, his hands gripping your wrists. You closed your eyes, surprised when you felt him untie you, leaving only a small strip of leather on your wrist, no beginning or end to it.

“Humans have a way of dealing with unruly people. So do we. You do as I say and someday that will come off and you’ll be allowed to leave,” he said.

“I’ve been to hell and they couldn’t break me, sweetie,” you said, the Alpha quickly hiding his flash of surprise. “I would chop off-”

He grabbed your arm and yanked you to your feet, pulling you out of the bedroom, the two of you winding up in a small hallway. You went past a kitchen and another hall, going to the other side of what looked like the house.

He glared at you and opened a door.

You were greeted to small voices coughing, three small children tucked away in beds, all of them sweaty and ill looking. You turned back to the Alpha, his chin rising.

“They are ill and I don’t know why. Help them and then you may go,” he said.

“I’m not a doctor,” you said.

“They aren’t human. I can’t bring them to a doctor without getting them killed or stuck in a lab. You’re a hunter. You understand our dynamic. Fix them,” he said.

“What-”

“Fix. The. Pups,” he growled, pulling the door shut after himself, leaving you alone with them. You thought for one that was a stupid thing as he’d just given you potential hostages. But the strap on your wrist was as good as any watchdog you figured and even if they were technically monsters...they were children.

You bent down by the first bed, a little girl probably only four or five years old clutching a teddy bear to her chest.

“Hi sweetheart,” you said, looking around, finding a thermometer on a table nearby. “I’m Y/N. What’s your name?”

“Georgia,” she said with a cough.

“Can you tell me what’s wrong, sweetie?”

You opened the door after half an hour with the three of them, Georgia, Gavin and Gabby, four year old triplets you’d learned. The Alpha was waiting at the end of the hall as you walked up to him and then past, his hand grabbing your arm.

“Well?” he asked.

“I told you. I’m not a doctor,” you said, shrugging him off. “I got symptoms and their temperatures but that’s it. I don’t know how to help you.”

“You’re a hunter. You research all the damn time. Research and find out what’s wrong,” he said.

“You’re their father. You fucking do it,” you said.

“I am not their father,” he said, a dark look in his eyes. “None of them are my blood but I am the Alpha and I will care for them.”

“I can’t help you,” you said.

“Then what’s the point of you,” he said, brushing past you and going out a back door. You looked out the window at him, rolling your eyes as you found some paper in the kitchen and wrote down the symptoms they each complained of and their temperatures. You knew his kind, the Alphas and Betas and Omegas, they ran hot, like dogs did. But the kids temperatures were too high and you were starting to understand why he’d kidnapped you.

If they didn’t start to get better and soon, they’d die.

You sighed as you stood up, going to the back window again and staring out at the Alpha standing in the backyard, tilting his head up at the sky. You sighed and turned to go inside, spotting a well out on the edge of the property. You glanced over at the leaky faucet in the kitchen, an idea sparking in your mind.

“Alpha,” you said, stepping outside, his head whipping around. “How opposed are you to breaking into a hardware store tonight?”

“What are you doing?” he asked, reaching for the glass of water when you swatted his hand away. “I will destroy you.”

“Shut up,” you said, pulling out the test strip from the water and comparing it to the chart. “Well, that’s not good.”

“What’s not good?” he asked, peering over your shoulder.

“The kids, do-”

“Pups,” he said.

“Fine. Do the pups drink water from the faucet?” you asked.

“Yeah, we all do,” he said, glancing down another hall.

“Wait. What do you mean all?”

“...There are two twelve year olds, a fourteen and a sixteen year old here as well,” he said. “We all drink from the tap. Why?”

“Because you have arsenic in your water. A lot of it.”

“Are you sure this will work?” he asked. “Arsenic is bad news, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” you said, pouring some of the mixture into a few small glasses. “Everyone in the house needs to drink this.”

“You first,” he said. You narrowed your eyes but took a sip, wincing as you pulled it away. 

“Go. Do the little ones. Now.”

“It says 100,” said the Alpha, holding up the thermometer to you in the kitchen. “They’re all perfectly fine.”

“Basic healing potion,” you said. “Keep it for when somebody scarpes a knee too hard.”

He nodded, walking behind you and curling a finger under the gag still around your neck. You froze, the Alpha untying it and setting it on the kitchen table.

“Thank you,” he said.

“Can I ask why you took me? Hunters, Alphas, we’re not known for getting along,” you said.

“Y/N Y/L/N. You’re known for your viciousness in your hunting world. You’re also known for letting an innocent monster go here and there,” he said. You raised your chin, the Alpha looking down. “I knew once you knew children were at risk, you wouldn’t go anywhere.”

“So you going to take this off now?” you asked, holding up your wrist. He grabbed your hand and mumbled, the thing falling off and to the ground. “Are we done?” 

“Never speak of this place to a soul,” he said. “Or I will kill you without a second thought.”

“For a guy who claims those aren’t his kids...they’re your kids, Alpha,” you said, giving him a nod as you headed for the front door. “See you never.”

Two Days Later

You were barely out of your car before the four kids stopped playing in the front yard and stared at you, three boys, one girl, all of them looking ready to run.

“Y/N!” you heard Georgia say as she ran over with a smile. “You came back!”

“Hey, sweetie,” you said, giving them all a nervous smile. “Where’s the Alpha? I need to talk to him.”

“Dean?” she asked, your head tilting. She grabbed your hand and took you back towards the house, the older ones following you as you went inside with the little girl. The Alpha, Dean, was sitting at the kitchen table working on something. “Dean! Y/N’s back!”

His whole body went tense, eyes going too many shades dark, one of the older kids grabbing Georgia and taking her outside before Dean was out of his seat. 

“I-” you said, Dean shoving you back against the closest wall, a hand around your throat.

“What did I tell you,” he said calmly. “You threatened my pack by returning. I don’t do well with hunters threatening my pack.”

“Came...help...jackass,” you said. He narrowed his eyes and relaxed his hand. You slid down the wall, coughing as he yanked you to your feet, forcing you to sit down in a chair at the table. “If this is how you treat your friends-”

“I have no friends,” he growled, glancing back at the oldest one, a girl with blonde hair. “Watch the pups. No one comes in the house until this is dealt with.”

You swallowed as they left, Dean stalking in front of you, bending over to get at your level.

“You better have a good fucking reason for coming back and I mean good,” he said. You stared him down, glancing at the sink. “We know about the water.”

“Arsenic isn’t in the soil here,” you said. He tilted his head. “The arsenic in your water supply. It didn’t come from the ground. Someone put it there.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying, Dean, someone knows you’re here and they were trying to take you all out very, very slowly, in a way you’d never even realize,” you said. “I don’t know about your life but-”

“Tim! Tom!” he shouted, two of the boys rushing inside. “We need to leave. Fifteen minutes. Triplets are with you two. Tell your brother and sister. Start packing. Now.”

They took off, all of the kids rushing in the house quickly.

“Beth!” he shouted, the teenage girl, the oldest one, came running into the kitchen. He dug into his pocket and tossed a set of car keys at her. “You drive and make sure everyone’s in the SUV ready to go.”

“You want us all in one car?” she asked.

“You and the kids in the SUV,” he said. “I’ll go separate. Just try not to get distracted by them and you’ll be fine.”

“Dean. Is-”

“I don’t know. I want you to drive you siblings to the campsite. Can you do that for me?” she nodded quickly. “You’re an Alpha. Act like you’re their Alpha and it’ll help keep them calm, especially since you’re blood, understand?”

“Yes, Alpha,” she said.

“Go sweetheart. Go,” he said. You looked up at Dean, getting a stare back from him. “You’re coming with me.”

“Do you have enough hunting crap?” he groaned, half the backseat filled up now after you cleared out your trunk.

“Why am I being kidnapped? Again?” you asked.

“I didn’t kidnap you this time,” he said. 

“You locked me in the car!” you said.

“Oh, you’re a hunter. You could have gotten out if you wanted to,” he said. You held up your bound wrists, Dean raising an eyebrow. “Shut up.”

“This is what I get for being kind to some mutt,” you said. He turned off the radio and you were pretty sure he would have pulled over if it weren’t for the kids driving in the car in front of you.

“I could tear your throat out with my teeth. Watch it, hunter,” he said.

“Sorry but I’m not some dog nanny. I only came back to tell you about the water, that’s it,” you said.

“Well why did you even fucking look?” he asked. You looked out the window, his hand grabbing your wrists. “Why?”

“Because you aren’t the only person that lives out there. I was doing some digging, seeing if I had to put in an anonymous tip you know and then I realized it was only your house and only your water which is weird seeing as you share a water source with your other hick ass neighbors and the levels were extremely high so yeah, I thought you might like to know someone was poisoning your not kids. Fucking asshole,” you said, raising your hands and starting to bite at the ropes on your wrist. 

“You need to leave those on,” he said, pushing your hands away.

“Buddy, I swear-”

“The safehouse we’re going to...it’s a last resort for the moment. There are others that live there already. Alphas. Any hunter that shows up there that’s not a prisoner is killed on site, no questions asked,” he said. 

“I have an idea. Let me go so that’s not a problem,” you said, holding up your hands. 

“No,” he said.

“No? Are you-”

“For all I know, you did this. You could be working with other hunters,” he said.

“If I did this, Dean, I would have poisoned you all with that cure,” you said. “You’d all be dead. So why don’t you come up with a better reason than that, dick.”

He grumbled but reached over with one hand, undoing the ropes and setting it on the bench between you.

“That goes back on when we get close,” he said.

“But why am I going in the first place?” you asked.

“Because,” he said, gripping the steering wheel.

“Oh, thank you. That cleared everything up,” you said. You crossed your arms and looked out the window, trying to figure out your next move.

“Because I need a hunter’s help. If you behave, no harm will come to you there. I’m the Alpha that caught you so my rule goes when it comes to you. Don’t give anyone a reason to do a thing and you’ll be fine,” he said.

“What help could you possibly want from me?” you asked.

“A hunter has been tracking down packs and slaughtering them. I need bait,” he said.

“Dean,” you said. “I’m not going to let you kill a hunter because they killed a few Alphas.”

“Do you know why I’m watching seven kids? A hunter murdered their parents. Not two Alphas that were trouble. A kind man and a kind woman that were out celebrating their anniversary. Kind people. You know two of those kids? Tim and Tom? Not even theirs. They adopted them. Yeah. Sound like a couple pieces of shit that had it coming,” said Dean, giving you a glare. “Family after family. I don’t kill innocent things and I am going to kill this hunter before he gets anywhere near these kids again. So that is why I need you to be bait. To lure him out. I don’t care what side you’re on. Now you can behave and not get hurt or we can do this a whole other way. Your choice.”

You didn’t say anything as you turned the radio back on, letting out a sigh before you went back to looking out the window.

“Winchester,” said a tall man as Dean led you by the arm through what looked like a campsite with little cabins. You tilted your head up, quickly staring back at the ground.

Winchester. Dean Winchester. You’d heard stories of him but he’d died for good about ten years back. Killed on a werewolf hunt. That’s what your parents had told you at least. They warned you to never get too cocky like the Winchester boy had. 

“If that isn’t Y/N Y/L/N,” said the man, bending down and getting in your face. You stayed still, the Alpha brushing his thumb over the bruise on your neck from when Dean had tackled you in the house earlier. “Why’d you bring a hunter here, boy?”

“The pups are in danger,” said Dean, the Alpha going as stiff as a board, a strange power radiating off of him. “I assume Tim and Tom are allowed to stay as well.”

“Of course. The boys will be treated Betas as far as I’m concerned once they’ve grown,” said the Alpha. He turned his head to you, giving you a dark smile. “Was she the one that killed Alex and Allison?”

“If she were, she wouldn’t be breathing,” said Dean. “She’ll be bait. Hunter’s look out for other hunters. The hunter that killed my friends, he was close to us. He was attempting to kill the pups. I needed to move them someplace safer.”

“They’re more than welcome. If this is the same hunter killing around the country, you have everyone’s support here. The children will be watched. Use the hunter to catch the other, then get rid of them both,” he said. You snapped your head up, the Alpha in front of you staring down. “You’ve killed our kind before.”

“I killed the Alpha that came to our house in the middle of the night and killed my parents. I’d call that even,” you said, narrowing your eyes.

“You’ve seen this place. There are only two options for you now. Be killed or be turned and I know how you hunters are,” he said.

“Let’s go,” said Dean, yanking on your arm. You looked back at the Alpha, feeling the gaze of everyone in the place on you.

You swallowed when Dean led you to a barn and opened a hatch to a cellar, walking you down. You wanted to say something but the words stuck on the tip of your tongue, Dean sitting you down on an old blanket.

“You said-”

“He is the head Alpha here but you are my prisoner. No one will harm you. I promise,” he said. You closed your eyes, hanging your head when you felt a gentle touch at your cheek. You raised your head, Dean placing a bottle of water in your hands and a few granola bars. “I will bring you more later. I promise.”

“You better.”

You were almost out of water and it was pitch black when you heard a large whoosh overhead. You tilted your head and went over to the cellar door, shouting when the thing broke open, a heavy log with flames rolling down the stairs and into the room.

“Fuck…” you said, ripping your ropes off and poking your head out of the cellar, the small barn you were in on fire. “Oh shit.”

You ran up and outside as fast as possible, watching as you saw people running around. Looking back at the campsite, you saw a cabin on fire, one you were pretty sure you saw the kids head into earlier. You ran over there, Beth nearly running into you from around the side of the building.

“What happened?” you said, Beth trying to go back in. “Where are the kids?”

“They’re out but Dean’s inside,” she said. 

“Go get help,” you said, Beth taking off as you went to the door and kicked it in, getting a lungful of smoke. You dropped down and into the burning building, crawling along the floor until you saw a leg inside. You coughed a few times and grabbed his leg, Dean passed out with a cut on his head. You yanked on him and managed to get hold of his other leg as you dragged him outside. 

You coughed violently once you were away from the smoke and flames, Dean groaning a little as you shook his shoulder.

“Wake up,” you said, feeling a heavy presence behind you. You spun around, a whole load of pissed off Alphas looking back at you. “I swear it wasn’t-”

You were freezing when you woke up, tied to some kind of fence on the edge of the property. You looked up from where you were sat on the ground, two Alphas with guns on either side of you. You felt a gag back in your mouth and you sighed, hoping Dean would wake up soon and explain everything.

“For fuck’s sake,” said Dean early the next morning when he saw you. “Tell me she was not out here all night in a fucking t shirt. It’s freezing.”

“She’s fine,” said the lead Alpha. “Your prisoner-”

“My prisoner saved my ass. The barn burnt down. Of course she got out. She could have run but she stayed and saved me so I’m tired of the games. Untie her. Now,” said Dean. The Alpha nodded and you were released, your arms moving slowly before you managed to pull down your gag.

“Thanks,” you said, staying seated for the moment, taking a look at your cut up hands.

“Well your bait worked. A little too well in my opinion,” said the Alpha.

“Post guards. He’ll be back,” said Dean, walking over and helping you to your feet. “Last I checked, we weren’t barbarians.”

“She’s a prisoner,” said the Alpha.

“Not anymore,” said Dean.

“You can’t-”

“Mine,” growled Dean, the others instantly backing off. You didn’t understand their dynamic enough to know what was going on but you went with him, following him into a cabin where he sat you down in a chair and started to clean up your hands. “I’m sorry...and thank you.”

“You know it was kind of a stupid plan, putting everyone in danger like that,” you said.

“Was it?” he asked, tilting his head up at you. “Think about it. Think about the places that were hit. What’s your hunter instincts telling you?”

“It was an inside job,” you said. Dean nodded quietly, returning to looking after your hands. “You knew, didn’t you.”

“I suspected. This confirmed it. Hunters and our kind don’t get along but hunters don’t start wars for no good reason. They got their revenge sometimes and okay but this is different. I think one of the Alpha’s here is killing others in order to start a fake war,” said Dean.

“But why?” you asked, Dean wrapping your hands up in gauze.

“Because some Alphas think they’re superior. That humans should be like us,” said Dean. You dropped your head, Dean running his finger over your palm. “You know who I am, don’t you.”

“Dean Winchester? Every hunter knows who you are. You’re supposed to be dead,” you said.

“Human Dean is. Alpha Dean started kicking about ten years ago,” he said, dropping your hands in your lap. “Werewolf got me pretty good. I killed it but I was bleeding out. I managed to get back to my car and drive away until I pulled over, figured it was best not to kill someone on the road on the way out. I must have been driving a bit erratically because the door flew open and there’s this guy there, big guy and he’s just staring at me. I knew he wasn’t just some guy. He was Alpha. He hauls me out of there and onto the side of this middle of nowhere road and his wife comes over. See the thing is, this werewolf I’d been hunting...it took a little girl. It was gonna turn her. I saved her. She was in the backseat. Turned out she was these people's kid and while I was over there dying, she tells them how I saved her. The guy immediately pulls out a knife and cuts his hand, presses it over an open cut I have and tells me we’re even. Next thing I know, I’m waking up in some bedroom and I feel a whole lot different and whole lot not dead.”

“He turned you,” you said.

“He saved my life because I saved his six year old daughter’s,” he said.

“Beth,” you said, Dean nodding. “Wait, you saved a kid that you knew had a dynamic?”

“I’ve done my fair share of things as a hunter but I don’t hurt little kids,” he said. “She turned out to be an Alpha. That’s rarer for a girl but I shouldn’t have been surprised. She can be a ball of spitfire.”

“Your friends that were killed...” you said, Dean sighing.

“I was very angry after I was turned. I was a hunter for fucks sake and then that happened. But they showed me that hunters have my kind so backwards. There’s so very few that are bad. Most are good and kind. Most live normal lives, live in normal neighborhoods. My friends lived in the country but they were as human as you are in most aspects,” he said.

“You gonna kidnap me anymore?” you asked. He chuckled and shook his head, glancing at your nervously. 

“I’m sorry. The past two months have been...stressful,” he said. “I understand if you don’t believe me.”

“Yeah, well,” you said, looking at your hand. “I might be on edge too if someone was killing my family.”

“I was always just Uncle Dean before. Seven of them...it’s a lot to handle,” he said.

“Who do you think it is around here? So I know who to keep an eye on?” you asked.

“The Alpha,” he said.

“Which one?” you asked.

“The Alpha, Y/N. As in, the first Alpha. Everyone is either a direct blood descendant or they were turned. He’s pack leader to us all,” said Dean. “Which makes him extremely dangerous.”

“Why?”

“If a pack leader gives an order, in the right kind of tone, it’s almost impossible to disobey it,” said Dean. “If he wants a war, he has an army like that.”

“Why would the Alpha want a war though if your kind are good like you say they are?” you asked.

“Because he wants you, humans, to become us. We’re gentle by nature, even if we don’t seem it. Angering our kind is dangerous and that’s what he’s doing with these scare tactics,” said Dean.

“I still don’t-” you said, cutting yourself off when the door opened and the Alpha walked inside along with a few others. 

“Is she tended to?” he asked.

“I think so. She still needs to warm up though,” said Dean.

“She can do so after she’s been turned,” said the Alpha. Your eyes went wide and you immediately shot behind Dean, the Alpha smirking at you. “It seems she’s chosen her Alpha already. Good. You can have a mate now. She’ll likely be Omega but in the event she’s not, send her out and we’ll find the best placement for her.”

“You ain’t turning me,” you said.

“Oh I know. Dean will. As she knows too much now and the killing option seems off the table, you’ll be turned. I’ll be back in an hour. If she’s not started to go through the process, we kill her,” he said. You stared at him as he left, the Alpha’s leaving as well but you could see them walking around the cabin and standing guard.

“He’s serious,” you said, staring at Dean.

“I’ll get you out of here,” he said. “I promise.”

Fifty Five Minutes Later

“Dean,” you said, watching him pace around the bedroom again. “Dean it’s okay. I always knew I’d die on a hunt. It’s okay. Just figure out a way to take care of the kids. And...call my parents. Tell them Franklin Street. They’ll help you however they can.”

“I thought your parents were dead,” he said.

“its complicated,” you said. “Just tell them and they’ll help you out.”

“You’re not dying,” he said.

“You can’t take on ten Alphas by yourself,” you said.

“I’m sorry,” he said, pulling out a knife and tackling you on the bed. He cut your arm, swallowing as you stared up at him. “It’ll save your life.”

“Fake it,” you said, Dean tilting his head. “Fake it. Don’t turn me but we fake it. You’re my Alpha in this situation, right? He can’t feel another Alpha’s Omega right?”

“You’re bonded to the Alpha that claims you so technically that’s true,” said Dean. “We’re gonna have to make it look good.”

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“This is gonna hurt,” he said, covering your mouth with his hand. You stared up at him as he tilted your head back and pressed his lips to your neck. “I’m sorry I got you into this mess.”

You didn’t have time to think before he bit into your flesh, a scream erupting from your mouth muffled as you felt him break the skin. He pulled back with a pant, shoving a bandana from his back pocket against the bleeding area, slowly moving his hand from your mouth.

“Fucker,” you whimpered, wiping off your face from the tears that spilled over. 

“This is how we fake it,” he said, helping you clean up your cheeks, peeling the bandana away to see the bleeding was starting to slow. “You’re my Omega now. You play that part until you can get out.”

“You could have warned me,” you said, sniffling again as Dean pulled you into his lap. 

“I had to make it so you’d cry,” he mumbled.

“Why?” 

“Cause he knows you’d put up a fight,” he said. He was quiet as he sat there with you, the front door opening two minutes later, Dean shoving the rag in his pocket before going back to hugging you. You watched the door open and the Alpha step inside. You couldn’t help but glare at him.

“Omega?” he asked, Dean leaving back enough to show off the very fresh mark on your neck.

“My Omega. It’s done,” said Dean as he stood up. “Never force me to do that to someone ever again, is that clear?”

“Don’t bring outsiders here and we won’t need to,” said the Alpha, giving you a nod. “Have your Omega tended to. We need to discuss the killings.”

“I just claimed her. I need to stay-” said Dean, the Alpha narrowing his eyes at him. Dean sighed and looked back at you. “Come, Omega. Beth will take you someplace to get cleaned up.”

You stared at him, seeing his hand fidget and realizing he didn’t have a choice. You swallowed and stood up, following him out the door and feeling the Alpha’s gaze on your back.

“Welcome to the family, Y/N,” he said. “A hunter is always useful around here.”

You shivered and left with Dean, walking with him until he spotted Beth walking around.

“Beth take Y/N to the Omega center, please, and get her warmed up and with some food,” said Dean. Beth looked at you and then at Dean, her face scrunching up before she slapped him. “Beth.”

“Fucking sicko. We’re here not even a day and you’re like the rest of these asshole Alphas around-”

“Long con,” said Dean quietly, grabbing her shirt collar. “As far as everyone is concerned, you are still presenting, understand me? Don’t become another puppet. Keep the kids safe and you help her get fixed up so when we have a chance to go, we go. Sorry, sweetie.”

He shoved her back on the ground, Dean lifting his chin as he spun around and headed back with the Alpha who had a little smirk on his face.

“Are you okay?” you asked, helping her up. 

“We need to get him out of here,” she said quietly as she took your hand, leading you over towards a tent. “The Alpha’s control is proximity based.”

“We need to get you out too,” you whispered.

“Are you really…” she asked.

“No. Don’t tell a soul. We need to get you kids out of here and we can’t do that if he and I are both dead,” you said. She nodded and you looked back once, Dean giving you a sad smile when he glanced over his shoulder. “I have a feeling we’re going to need to move by the end of the day.”

To say things had not gone to plan was a bit of an understatement. The kids were long gone on the road and you knew your parents would take care of them. Dean on the other hand was currently dragging you into the Alpha’s house and not looking too pleased at himself.

“Fight it, Dean,” you grumbled, his hands digging in harder.

“I’m trying,” he said, stopping with you in an office, the Alpha turning around in his chair. 

“You haven’t been a hunter in long time, Dean,” he said as he stood. “You picked a hunter over us and I have to say, I’m disappointed.”

“I didn’t pick anyone,” said Dean. “I was using her for bait to lure in the-”

“Don’t play dumb,” he said. “You already know I’m behind this so why keep up the charade?”

“Why kill your own kind if you can control the Alphas?” you asked.

“Fear tactic,” said the Alpha. “It used to be just me until I started scaring them into coming back, coming closer. Some of them I knew would never get behind such a thing so...those were the ones to go.”

“You killed Alex and Allison,” said Dean.

“They saved a hunter. A hunter. They’ve been on my shit list for a decade, Dean,” he said. “So where’d the kids run off to, hm?”

“They’re gone,” he said.

“I figured as much. Doesn’t matter. I got you in the end. You’ll fall in line just like every other Alpha around here has,” he said, turning his attention on you. “You know, I’m gonna need more Alphas around here. Why don’t you mate your Omega. Now.”

You turned your head up at Dean as he dropped your arm. He lifted his head, the Alpha cocking his before he went wide eyed.

“You didn’t change her,” he said.

“Y/N. Run,” said Dean, shoving you out of the door and slamming it shut after you. You sprinted out of the house and across the campus, making it to Dean’s car by the time you saw more than one Alpha running at you.

“Oh shit, oh shit,” you said, tearing out of there. You drove for about twenty minutes before you knew you were far enough away that they wouldn’t come looking. “Shit.”

Dean was probably in a bad way and there was no way you’d be able to get back there on your own and grab him.

You rested your head against the steering wheel, lifting your head when a sign across the street flickered.

“This is an extremely bad idea.”

“Kid could you just fly it where I said,” you said, glaring at the teenager in the back of the car.

“You’re so buying us another case of beer,” said the one in the passenger seat. 

“Yeah, whatever,” you said, the other one turning his attention back at the screen. “This is gonna work?”

“I’ve used this drone multiple times to drop water balloons on my sister. I know what I’m doing, mam,” he said.

“Mam. I’m fucking 25 and I’m getting mam,” you said. “You see the guy yet?”

“Uh, there’s a lot of guys,” he said. “They look like they’re kicking somebody’s ass.”

You grabbed his shoulders and looked at the screen, looking around until you saw the Alpha.

“That one,” you said. “Drop it on that one.”

“This is really weird,” said the one sitting in the passenger seat.

“Fifty bucks and I’ll get you boys another six pack, alright?” you said.

“Bon Voyage,” said the one in the backseat, dropping the balloon on the Alpha. You stared at the scene as people backed away, the Alpha coughing before he dropped to the ground like a sack of bricks. “Did you just kill that guy?”

“Nope. Knocked him out for a while though,” you said, watching all of the Alphas around start to hit the deck. “And apparently everyone else. Okay. Slide over kid. You’re about to have company.”

“This guy is bleeding on me,” said the one in the back, Dean groaning in his seat next to him, still out of it. “Did you kidnap or save him?”

“We’re so putting this on the inter-” said the passenger seat one before you ripped the drone out of his hands and tossed it out the window. “Hey!”

“I hate when I accidentally throw stuff out the window, don’t you?” you said.

“You owe me like five hundred bucks,” he said.

“That thing did not cost five hundred dollars,” you said.

“Drone. Camera. Beer. Five hundred bucks,” he said.

“Whatever,” you said. Half an hour later you left the teens with some money and got back on the highway, Dean passed out in the backseat. He was quiet, his breathing ragged at times and you knew you needed to clean him up before you met up with the kids. 

You found a motel about an hour away, plenty far off the highway in case someone came looking. You got the room on the end and after checking it out, managed to haul a barely conscious Dean inside.

“Alright, buddy,” you said, getting him on the bed and out of his shoes and jacket. He wheezed, glancing at the sink in the room. “You want water?”

He barely nodded and you jumped up, getting him a glass. You had to tilt his head so he could drink, the water coming back tinged red.

“You got your ass kicked,” you said. He stared at you, taking a shallow breath. “That breathing is starting to worry me.”

You went back to the car and grabbed your duffel and medical bag, setting them down on the table inside. You cut off his flannel and t shirt, staring at his chest when you’d pushed the clothing away.

“Fuck, Dean,” you said. His chest and ribs were black and blue, his whole torso was, but his left side pulsing under the skin was what worried you. You got him out of his jeans while you tried to figure out the best option, Dean lazily staring at you when he was down to just his boxers.

His body was covered in bruises and cuts, Dean not bothering to move at all. His leg throbbed and you watched the skin bubble, moving in time with his pulse, straight up to his ribs.

“Shit. You need a fucking hospital,” you said. He moved his finger to your hand, shaking his head once. “You need a hospital. You probably have internal bleeding and broken ribs and a whole bunch of other stuff I can’t fix.”

He took a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut.

“You can’t even speak. You need an ambulance,” you said. He grabbed your wrist, barely holding on but you knew he’d rather die than have someone find out what he was. “Stay here. Don’t die.”

You went out to the car and dig through the box Dean had tossed your hunting supplies in, finding the little black box. You pulled it out, staring at the motel door.

“I can’t believe I’m using this on you, Winchester,” you said. You took the box in the motel room and set it down on the bed. You opened it up to show Dean the glowing vial. “Here goes nothing.”

You held it up to his lips and he swallowed it down, squeezing his eyes shut as you watched his body turn a soft red for a moment. When the light dissipated, he was still injured but the life threatening wounds seem to be gone.

“Thanks,” he said. He touched his left side, letting out a sigh. “Pretty sure my lung was trying to pop open inside of me.”

“You’d rather die than go to a hospital,” you said.

“I’m sorry I don’t want the doctors to lock up the genetic freak,” he said, trying to sit up but only making it halfway before he plopped back down. “I thought grace fixed you up.”

“It does. I split what I had in half to make it last. Be grateful I had that left,” you said.

“I’m not complaining,” he said. You nodded and went back to your bag, starting to work on cleaning him up. He was tense every time you wiped some alcohol over a cut and eventually you gave him the bottle of whiskey in your bag. He downed a few shots worth quickly, relaxing as you started to bandage him up.

“Come here,” you said, moving him to sit up, cleaning off his face.

“You shouldn’t have come back for me,” he said. You stared at him, wiping off his cheek. “That was fucking stupid.”

“You were half dead. If you took much more, you would be,” you said. He put his hand over your own, moving the rag away from his face. “What?”

“You’re somehow kinder than the stories I’ve heard,” he said. You put your hand back and started to work on the cut near his eye, careful to avoid pressing too hard. “I’m sorry. For dragging you into this.”

“You thought the little kids were sick,” you said, Dean grabbing your wrist.

“I’ve been like this, been an Alpha, longer than I was a hunter. I forgot about hunting. If I’d thought for two seconds to use a healing potion on them, none of this would have happened,” he said.

“Those kids would still be in danger and you probably would have wound up under the Alpha’s control, just like everyone else at that campsite. The kids would have been victims just like all those other Beta and Omegas I saw there. They were scared. You guys would have ended up just like them,” you said.

“I’m still sorry,” he said. You sighed and let your hand rest in his palm, looking up through your lashes, his green eyes on you. 

“Promise to never kidnap me again, Alpha boy, and we can be friends,” you said.

“I promise,” he said. You smiled, Dean allowing a brief one to cross his face. He reached out to your neck, running his thumb near where he’d bit you. “I can fix that.”

“Uh, how?” you asked.

“Healing potion. Learned it from this hunter,” he said, a smirk crossing his face. 

“How about you rest while I take care of that? I’ll whip you up some, try to help a few of those cuts,” you said. 

“No, we ought to catch up with…” he trailed off, your hand pushing him back to lay down.

“Rest, Dean. It’s the middle of the night,” you said. “I already told my parents to let me know as soon as the kids show up.”

“A few hours,” he said.

“Alright. A few hours.”

“Morning,” you said, carrying some coffee and breakfast into the motel room. Dean was awake and dressed in the clothes you laid out for him, looking a million times better than the night before. “How are you feeling?”

“Alright. Mostly sore,” he said.

“You look better,” you said, his face only slightly scuffed up now instead of swollen and bruised.

“Did you get some teenagers to help bust me out of there or was I imagining that?” he asked.

“No. I did that. I used their drone. We dropped some powder I got from a witch friend on everyone. It knocked all you Alphas out like that,” you said.

“That’s actually an incredibly good idea,” he said. “I’ll have to remember that one.”

“It was incredibly stupid and we got lucky,” you said. He nodded, taking one of the coffee’s for himself. “My parents called. The kids got in around four. They’re strangely calm my dad said.”

“Probably Beth,” said Dean, digging into the paper bag and pulling out an egg and sausage sandwich. He unwrapped it and took a big bite, smiling to himself. “I’m starving.”

“Well there’s a bunch. I figured you’d be eager to get on the road,” you said. “Also, I cleaned your backseat. You’re welcome.”

“They say anything more about the kids?” he asked. 

“No. They got them to bed. My dad was gonna make them a big homemade breakfast so he was excited,” you said.

“Your folks know what they are?” asked Dean, chewing and taking another bite. 

“Yeah. Don’t worry,” you said. “What’d you mean about Beth before?”

“Well she’s an Alpha. She hit puberty a little early but she’s their blood. She’s technically the kid’s pack leader. I’m an adult though so I simply am acting the part until she decides she wants the job or not,” he said.

“And the human kids?”

“Scared of big sis,” he smiled. “Come on. I want to get on the road.”

Dean drove for a few hours before you swapped and took over, just breaking into Washington when Dean sat up in his seat.

“He doesn’t know where your parents live, right?” he asked. “The Alpha?”

“No. I promise,” you said. You turned down an uneven road and another, coming to a clearing with a gate across the drive, Dean leaning forward. “What?”

“Your parents live here? Your hunter parents?” he said.

“Mhm. My mom is a stock broker for fun. She’s really good at it,” you said.

“I can see,” he said as you punched in the code and the gate opened. You drove down to the garage and parked inside beside the SUV the kids went in. Dean followed you carefully outside, a few giggles coming from close by. You waved him to follow you to the backyard, your mom on the deck with a few of the kids, your dad kicking around a soccer ball in the grass.

“Dean!” said Georgia when she spotted him, quickly rushing over and giving him a hug.

“Hey, cutie,” he said softly. “You guys doing okay?”

“They’re okay,” said Beth, standing up from the deck chair she was in, giving him a nod.

“You must be the Alpha,” said your dad, walking over and holding out his hand. 

“Greg Henderson?” asked Dean as he shook it.

“I haven’t seen you since you were about ten,” he said. “How’s your brother?”

“Uh, good. He’s a lawyer, got out of the life,” said Dean. 

“Good for him. Sorry to hear about your dad a few years back. He was a good hunter. He cared a lot about you boys, even if he didn’t know how to show it sometimes,” he said.

“Thank you. I don’t remember you having a daughter though,” said Dean.

“Y/N’s not our birth daughter,” said your mom. “She’s about five, six years younger than you I think, Dean. You two just missed each other by about a month a think. Y/N came around the end of that February.”

“You made me a birthday cake that year,” said Dean with a smile. “Mrs. Henderson. I remember you guys now. You watched me and my brother a few times while dad was on hunts. Only a few hours here and there but I remember.”

“Small world,” you said.

“Your other parents were killed, weren’t they,” said Dean.

“By an Alpha,” you said.

“We found her and gave her a place to stay until we decided we’d raise her,” said your dad.

“She was a very quiet child that first year,” said your mom.

“She was halfway through killing an Alpha when I found her. Five years old,” said your dad. “I never worried about that one and boys.”

“A five year old killed an Alpha?” said Dean.

“No, but she injured him enough to hold on while she had to wait for us to get there. Don’t piss that one off,” he said.

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” said Dean.

“So how’d you wind up with the Brady bunch?” asked your dad.

“The triplets were sick and Dean knew a hunter was in the area so he asked for my help,” you said, feeling Dean’s gaze on you. “We put aside our differences to help the kids.”

“You realize we taught you to bullshit like that, right?” said your dad.

“Leave it alone, Greg. We have bigger problems than how they met,” said your mom. 

“I know. Can we get some lunch first? We’ve been driving all morning,” you said.

“Of course. I’ll fire up the grill, get the kids some grub in ‘em too.”

“The Alpha Alpha?” asked your mom after lunch, the kids playing in the backyard aside from Beth who was passed out in your dad’s hammock.

“Yup,” said Dean.

“And you’re saying that the Alpha can control other Alpha’s, against their will?” asked your dad.

“He did it to Dean, right in front of me,” you said.

“The older girl, she’s an Alpha like you?” he asked.

“Yes. The Alpha doesn’t know that though. She along with the rest of them need a place to lay low,” said Dean. “I know hunters and my kind don’t get on but they’ve been through enough the past few months.”

“They’re more than welcome to stay,” said your mom. 

“Thank you,” said Dean. He stood up and you frowned.

“Where are you going?” you asked.

“To deal with the Alpha,” he said.

“I didn't just save you for you to go die on me,” you said. He grabbed your hand and pulled you off the deck and around the corner of the house. “Dean. You can’t go back.”

“I have to,” he said.

“You’re going to either die or you get under his control,” you said.

“He’s hurting people. He-” said Dean, cutting himself off and squeezing his eyes shut. “He killed their parents. My friends.”

“I’m sorry,” you said. “I am. But there’s no way you’re going near that guy. Let us figure out a plan.”

“Who’s gonna help? All of my friends are stuck at that place or the Alpha has him them doing whatever he wants,” he said. “Your parents got out of hunting years ago. Look at this place. They don’t hunt so that gives me what, you? You go in there, the Alpha turns you and makes you his Omega like that. Life over. I’m the best guy to deal with this, plain and simple.”

“No you’re not,” said Beth, walking around the corner. “I am.”

“Bethany, no,” said Dean.

“I’m already an Alpha. He can’t hurt me as long as he doesn’t know,” she said.

“He can hurt you. He will hurt you,” said Dean. 

“But-”

“No.”

“You’re not the leader of this pack anymore. I am,” she said. Dean tilted his chin up, narrowing his eyes.

“You’re gonna stick around until your little sisters and brother and all grown up? You gonna be cool with waiting until you’re my age to have a life?” he asked.

“I’m pack leader,” she said.

“Fine,” said Dean. “Do some chores for these people every once in a while.”

He turned and started heading for the garage, Beth staring at you before she took off after him.

“De-”

“Sorry. I’m not in the pack anymore,” he said, holding up a hand.

“De De,” she said, grabbing his arm, Dean coming to a stop. “You’re in the pack. You’re always in the pack. I’m pack leader so I’ll worry about them and you worry about the Alpha, okay?”

“It’s your pack now, Beth. It was always going to be your pack,” he said gently. “I will deal with this and you teach them how to be good, alright?”

“You’re in the pack,” she growled. Dean stared her down, Beth giving it right back. “Pack.”

“No.”

“Pack.”

“No.”

“Pack,” she said, Dean cocking his head. “That’s an order.”

“We both know you could make me. I could very easily slide back in. But part of being pack leader means you let your pack have it’s own free will,” he said.

“Make him stay,” said Beth to you. Dean shook his head and headed for his car. 

“Stop,” you said, Dean not even slowing down. “I said, stop.”

Dean tensed up, glancing back over his shoulder at you.

“You’re not going on your little death trip. You’re in your pack and that’s it,” you said. “You owe me.”

“Fine,” said Dean quietly.

“Now you two talk about your whatever, leader stuff while I make a few calls.”

“Hey,” said Dean rattling on the door to your dad’s office. “How’re you making out in here?”

“I got a few calls out to some hunter friends. They’re keeping an eye on him. Looks like he moved everyone to some abandoned farm, a bunch of ranchhand homes or something. They’re in Colorado. Apparently he’s claiming that I attacked the camp and killed an Alpha, so that’s lovely,” you said. “What about you and Beth?”

“We will be co-leaders and I have final say,” he said. 

“Good,” you said. “I don’t think you should leave your family just like that.”

“You come up with a genius plan yet that doesn’t involve getting us killed?” he asked.

“Not yet,” you said, scratching your wrist absently. “Wait. When we met, you said your kind had a way of dealing with unruly people.”

“The collar?” he asked.

“Collar? It was on my wrist,” you said.

“It was a collar,” he said. “We call them collars anyway.”

“Would something like that work on the Alpha?” you asked.

“In theory, yes,” he said. “Getting close would be a problem. There would be a lot of problems in getting close.”

“But it’s possible,” you said.

“The collar was invited by an Omega. Basically…” he trailed off, getting lost in a thought. “We don’t collar him. We collar all the other Alphas.”

“Huh?” you said.

“The collar is traditionally used by an Omega on their Alpha. It helps an Alpha think clearer and you know, works a bit like a shock collar if they don’t play along but point is, the Omegas at that farm...they can get the collars on their Alphas and then they’ll help get them on the rest of the Alphas and then the Alpha is on his own,” said Dean. “They’ll still have to fight it but I’m betting they’ll get their free will back.”

“Alright, so if we can sneak in a message to the Omegas, then I can go in and take out the Alpha,” you said.

“I take out the Alpha,” said Dean.

“You’re still an Alpha, Dean. With no Omega to take ownership of your collar. You can’t go,” you said. 

“It doesn’t have to be an Omega to work,” he said. He left for a moment and returned with a small leather strip, handing it to you. “Put it on me.”

“I don’t see how this will work,” you said, barely putting the thing around his wrist before it sealed itself shut. You felt dizzy for a moment, looking back at Dean who was taking a deep breath. “Is that it?”

“Tell me stop at the door,” he said as he stood up. 

“Stop,” you said, Dean still walking past the doorframe. “I said stop.”

He immediately froze and grabbed his hand, coming back to the room and letting out a sigh. 

“Shit, I forgot how much that hurts,” he said. “But see? Now I can go.”

“You realize that you just gave a hunter complete control over you,” you said. 

“I know,” he said as he turned back for the door.

“You don’t have to wear it Dean, not until we head out,” you said.

“It doesn’t hurt me, Y/N. I will try to reach out to some people I know, Betas and Omegas, try to get the message out,” he said. You watched him leave, Dean pausing in the hall and looking back at you. “Don’t worry. It’s a good plan. It’ll work.”

“Bad plan,” you groaned when you came to stop from rolling. You looked back over your shoulder, Dean out cold on the ground nearby. “Very bad plan.”

“You know, I think I’ll just kill you instead,” said the Alpha. “Filthy hunter. Turning a good Alpha against us.”

“You did that on your own, pal,” you said, the Alpha raising his chin as he walked over to you. “You turned them all against you on your own. Why do think they’re all gone? That they listened to the others once they got their free will back. You killed your own people to start a stupid war.”

“I can always start over. Plenty of humans out there to bring in,” he said, grabbing your wrist. He slapped his hand around it and you felt the collar hit your skin, quickly removing his hand as he stood up with a smirk.

Pain tore through you, in every cell, in every nerve ending. Hell hadn’t been as bad as that was. You try to breathe but couldn’t, tried to move but couldn’t. You couldn’t do anything.

It went on and on, your body feeling as though it was literally tearing itself apart.

Until you sucked in a gasp that had you crying out in pain, rolling to your side as you saw what had happened. Dean was standing over the Alpha, covered in blood, the Alpha laying motionless on the ground, the dirt darkening under him.

“Y/N,” he said, watching you roll onto your back and cough up blood. “Shit. Shit.”

You coughed a few more times, Dean squeezing his eyes shut before he cut his palm open and stared at you.

“You’ll die if I don’t do this,” he said. “You’re bad. You still might.”

“Do it,” you said. He nodded and helped his hand over one of your open wounds.

“Welcome to the pack.”

You passed out when you were with Dean, groggily walking up to find about ten people staring down at you in some room. You spotted Dean who gave you a smile, someone saying something to you.

“What?” you asked, getting your bearings back.

“I said, what are you?” he asked.

“Tired,” you said, Dean smirking in the back. 

“What is your dynamic?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” you said. The room full of people looked at you and then back at Dean.

“Maybe she hasn’t presented yet is all,” said Dean.

“Her body healed. She should have presented by now,” said the man next to you. You sat up and took a deep breath. “Why-“

“You’re not human,” said Dean. “You’re one of us.”

“We should talk. Alone,” you said. You grabbed his hand and took off outside with him, pulling him over to a quiet tree.

“What are you?” he asked.

“I’m a human. With an Omega parent,” you said.

“How is that possible?” he asked.

“My mom, birth mom, was Omega. She slept with a human man. She hated the Alpha she was with. An Omega with a human…” you said.

“Makes a human,” said Dean.

“Yes. I have Omega genes but they’re dormant in me. It’s why I didn’t turn,” you said.

“I thought you killed an Alpha when you were a kid,” he said.

“I did. The Alpha my mom was with killed her and her husband. My human dad. She left once she was pregnant and five years later that Alpha caught up with us,” you said.

“So you’re human...but an Omega?” he asked.

“Yes. I haven’t ‘presented’ like I normally would but that’s because my parents put a spell on me so I would never have to worry about turning. I decided a very long time ago I never wanted an Alpha,” you said.

“You were never in any danger of turning,” he said.

“No. You can’t force what’s already there. I...it’s something very personal. I should have said something sooner but…” you trailed off, Dean smiling.

“It’s okay. I get it. No one knows I used to be a hunter,” he said. “I’ll keep your secret.”

“You don’t have to,” you said. “Saving me like that...you kind of turned off the spell. I’ll start going through presentation soon.”

“I don’t understand,” he said.

“I chose to let you do that,” you said. “It was always my choice. I made the choice to become Omega in that moment so now...I will be.”

“I’ll still keep your secret. We’ll just say it was delayed,” he said. You nodded, Dean giving you a hug. 

“What’s that for?” you said.

“Just trust me. You’re gonna want a whole lot of hugs real soon.”

One Day Later

“Y/N,” said Dean as you followed him inside from the deck. “Omega.”

“Mhm,” you hummed, your body loving all of the feel good hormones you got from someone using your title. 

“I know presentation can be overwhelming and you want to stick around the pack leader but try to relax,” he said.

“Okay,” you said, giving him a hug from behind.

“Wait, so are you gonna get a heat?” he asked.

“Not any worse than what human me got for that time of the month,” you said, burrowing your face between his shoulders. “Why do you smell so good?”

“I’m not sure. I know the pack leader’s scent can be comforting when members are stressed,” he said.

“Uh, aren’t you forgetting about the obvious reason?” asked Beth as she came into the kitchen to get a snack. “True mates?”

“I was human and then turned. We don’t get true mates,” he said.

“Yeah but you were human, Y/N was human...true mates…” she said.

“Isn’t it past your bedtime?” asked Dean.

“Greg and Donna said I can stay up however late I want,” she said. 

“Greg and Donna don’t have to get your lazy ass out of bed in the morning,” said Dean.

“Oh come on,” she said.

“We have to move back home,” he said. She stared at him, Dean lifting his chin. “You don’t want to go back, do you.”

“The Henderson’s house is so big and we’re near a town and-”

“And the Henderson’s did us a favor. We are not going to move in because you like it here. Why don’t you want to go home?” he asked.

“I don’t like that house,” she said. 

“I thought we agreed I get final say,” said Dean. “You’re not an adult, Beth. I make those kinds of decisions.”

“Dean, can I talk to you for a minute?” you asked, tugging on his hand to go back to the deck. He pursed his lips the second you had the door closed, looking back in the house at Beth. “She found her parents, didn’t she.”

“Yes,” said Dean.

“...My parents offered to let you and the kids stay here earlier” you said. “It’s not a bad place to grow up.”

“We can’t just barge into their house and take it over,” said Dean.

“Dean...think of how big this house is. Like how big it is, how many bedrooms,” you said.

“You have siblings, don’t you,” said Dean.

“I’m the youngest. My parents had lots of kids. Kids that lost their parents to monsters,” you said. “They took us in, let us know that we weren’t nuts, that monsters were real. They’ll happily be another family to those seven kids.”

“...We’re all in the same pack now,” he said with a nod. “As long as it’s safe.”

“This place is warded up to here,” you said. “It’s safe.”

“You going to keep hunting?” he asked.

“Yes,” you said. 

“Why?”

“Someone has to,” you said.

“I’m a bit rusty but you want a partner?” he asked. You cocked your head, Dean shrugging. “I’m not leaving a brand new Omega on her own, even if she is a badass. You’re vulnerable right now.”

“You don’t want to stay with the kids?” you asked.

“Uncle Dean hasn’t lived with those guys in a while. I stop in every so often but that’s the norm for us. I only stuck around because they needed me. I’m not parent material,” he said.

“I’d disagree with you on that,” you said. “But why would you want to hunt again? Don’t you like being normal?”

“Sweetheart, I’m Dean Winchester. I ain’t been normal since I was four years old,” he said, giving you a smile. “I got complacent and look what happened. I want to try and turn our reputation around with hunters. Only way I do that is to show them we’re on the same side.”

“Alright. I’m not ready to get back out there just yet,” you said. “I need a break after all of this.”

“Trust me, so do I.”

Two Months Later

“Thanks,” said Henry, giving Dean a handshake. “You ever need some help on a hunt, give me a call and I’ll return the favor.”

“Just glad we stopped that witch before things got even worse,” said Dean. You gave Henry a smile and wave as Dean wandered back over to Baby and leaned against the hood with you.

“Making friends?” you asked.

“Slowly. Being a Winchester helps,” he said, tickling his finger under your scarf. “How’s it feeling?”

“Better,” you said, Dean peeling back the scarf. “It’s just a graze, Dean.”

“Let’s keep the neck injuries to a minimum,” he said, moving his finger lower, tickling over a soft spot of skin.

“You keep tickling my bonding gland and it makes an Omega think a thing or two,” you said.

“I’m checking is all,” he said. “You don’t want to damage it.”

“I didn’t hurt it,” you said, pulling his hand away. “I promise.”

“I worry if you couldn’t tell,” he said.

“You? No, you’re super laid back,” you teased, a small wave of Dean’s scent rolling off of him. “Dude. I’m calm. You can relax with the Alpha stuff.”

“I’m not doing anything,” he said. You tilted your head, Dean nodding. “Oh.”

“Oh what?” you asked.

“Beth may have had a point after all,” he said. “I keep smelling you but I thought you’re on edge is all.”

“Explain, please,” you said.

“True mates have a connection whether the pair is bonded or not. The bond cements itself when the mating happens but that before part...mates can always scent each other, no matter what. You’re fully Omega now. I’m just saying, Beth could have been right,” he said.

“You think we’re true mates?” you asked.

“I’m offering up a reason as to why you might be smelling me is all,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets. You reached into your own pocket and pulled out the collar there, Dean making sure you always carried one on you. 

You held it out to him, Dean offering his hand with a curious look on his face. You smiled and slipped it into his palm, Dean cocking his head.

“I don’t need it,” you said.

“You should keep it just in case,” he said, putting it back in your hand.

“Just in case what? The Alpha is gone. No one has control,” you said.

“There will always be bad people. Bad Alphas,” he said. “Keep it. Please.”

“How about you hold onto it for me,” you said.

“Alright,” he said, taking it and placing it in his pocket.

“Dean.”

“Hm?”

“Do you want to take a few days off? Relax somewhere,” you said. “Talk about the elephant in the room.”

“What elephant,” he said.

“The one where possibly we’re true mates,” you said.

“Even if we are, we don’t have to do anything about it,” he said. 

“I know. I just worry about you,” you said.

“Why?”

“Cause someone should,” you said. He looked down, finding your hand and lacing his fingers together with yours. 

“Do you want to get some coffee?” he asked, a soft smile on his face.

“Yeah, Alpha. I’d love to.”

________

[evil-overlord-scriptology]

Dating My Brother’s Archenemy Pt. 2 (ARCHIVED)

CrAzYArtist: Party? Like full out high school party? Drinking and drugs and everything? O.o I didn't know you were into that...

 GreenThumb: Yeah... and my sister is making me go. But it'd give us a chance to hang out.

 MonKeybiz: I'm for it! As long as you don't make me do anything against my will...

 $Cha-Ching$: Fine by me, never been to one before.

 CrAzYArtist: Where's it at?

 GreenThumb: Ermmm... It's Amber's party... My sister is friends with her and she's dragging me a long as her ride back home. Can't see why I can't just wait around in town until she's ready...

 MonKeybiz: ...You're kidding, right?

 $Cha-Ching$: Gives Kori a perfect chance to speak with Nathaniel though...

 MonKeybiz: True...

 CrAzYArtist: Say one more word about that and I'll break the record of my grudges.

 $Cha-Ching$: No idea of what you mean, but I can tell you're serious. Not crossing the line

 MonKeybiz: I second that!

 GreenThumb: Besides, it gives you three a perfect chance to crash Amber's party.

 CrAzYArtist: I'm in!

 $Cha-Ching$: Me too!

 MonKeybiz: Me three! lol

 *RabidsingeR has signed in*

 CrAzYArtist: Clear you weekend calendar, Lexsie, we're going to crash Amber's party!

 MonKeybiz: And do a little matchmaking between Nath and Kori on the side.

 $Cha-Ching$: Hey, this is Penni!

 GreenThumb: Plus you finally get to meet me in person!

 RabidsingeR: You had me at 'crash Amber's party' XD I'm going to thoroughly enjoy this...

 "You are not going out like that." Castiel said, not even looking up from his guitar. I looked down at my pure white flowing knee length dress and sheer tights with snowflakes picked out in silver. Lysander, who was sitting across from him scribbling away, glanced up, raised an eyebrow then looked at my brother, "She's not dressed inappropriately." Castiel still wouldn't look up, "She's going to that stupid party, so she's dressed inappropriately." He stated simply. I rolled my eyes to Lexsie who kept dabbing at her make up while Penni kept slapping her hand away. I wondered how Lexsie could even like my brother, he was just a pain sometimes. Penni smacked Lexsie's hand away again, "If you keep touching it, you're going to smudge my work!" The blonde girl snapped. Savannah sighed, "Really Lexsie. You're the one who wanted Penni to do your make up..." Lexsie's fingers started inching their way towards her face again, but one glare from Penni stopped them.

 Castiel finally looked up, "You look fine Lexsie. Stop fussing." He said flatly. Lexsie didn't really need the bright pink colored blush after that, she was so red in the face that the base couldn't hide it. Savannah, Penni and I giggled. Over the few days that we had to get our costumes ready for Amber's Halloween party Lexsie and Castiel went from Stage 1: 'You're Just My Friend, Whatever' to Stage 2: 'Blushes and Compliments.' It was all according to Tansy's '10 Stages of Relationships' chart. Penni was at Stage 7: the 'Can't be Without You' stage. Savannah was still at stage one with Lysander. Tansy said I was between Stage 5: 'Shyly Skipping Around the Subject of Dating' and Stage 6: 'Small Kisses and Presents.' I thought it was strange that Tansy had this whole thing already worked out, and that it made sense, somewhat.

 I sighed and snatched up my white wedge heels, “Let's go we're going to be late. Hey Castiel, are you using the car?” My brother, squinting at a page of lyrics, shook his head 'no'. I smirked, now came to part of tricking him, “I need the keys really fast, where are they?” Still trying to decipher the Lysander's writing, Castiel pointed to the small bowl sitting on the table, “There, stop bothering me.” He snapped. Before my twin realized he had been duped, I grabbed the car keys and ushered my snickering friends out the door, calling over my shoulder, “We'll be home late, see you later!” Before I closed the door, I could see Lysander smirking at me, he winked. So he knew my plan, but didn't bother to tell my brother. Guess he was on my side again.

 vvv

 So far the party was a total bore. The only thing exciting was when some random couple got into a major fight which ended with a major make out session that made me want to gag. Penni seemed to be enjoying herself though, having never been to a stereotypical teen party. Even I had been before, when Lexsie dragged me to one our freshmen year, that was when we met Savannah. And I met Ty, much to my later misfortune. I kept to the seats, sandwiched between couples who couldn't keep their hands off each other and druggies smoking themselves silly. Savannah had left in search for a soda, knowing it would be a lost cause, while Lexsie was busy warding off guys hitting on her. Penni, however, had headed straight for the dance floor. From my view, I could tell she was owning the floor with her crazy moves. I hadn't even known she was into dancing.

 Savannah reappeared, two Dr. Peppers in her hand, “Guess Nathaniel is cracking down on the beer, I couldn't find any.” She said as she handed me one of the frigid cans. I shot her a look, “Were you looking for them?” I asked suspiciously. Savannah plopped down next to me, not caring if her medieval lady dress was wrinkled in the process, and laughed, “Of course not. But you know how hard it is to find a coke at these parties. I was kinda suspicious when the first cooler was nothing but sodas, so was the second and the third... after I looked around, I couldn't find any beer.” I popped the tap on my soda and took a nice long drink. Something bumped into me, causing me to spew my drink... just as Amber walked past in her skimpy pirate girl costume.

 As Lexsie would say: It was an opportunity worth dying for, and from the look Amber gave me, I thought she really was going to kill me. Savannah dying of laughter beside me didn't help my case of it being an accident. Suddenly I went from being the invisible snow princess, to the girl facing Amber's wrath. I slouched a little in my seat, bracing myself for the hurricane that was about to be unleashed.

 “YOU LITTLE BITCH!! You did that on purpose! Why are you even here, I know I didn't f***ing invite you!” Amber started, her voice shrill to the point that I knew any dogs within a mile could hear her. I slumped down a little lower, my cheeks flaming red. I didn't like being the center of attention and suddenly I was on Broadway. “Uhh... I'm sorry, I didn't-” I started, but Amber didn't even let me explain, “You ruined my $200 costume! You are soooooo paying me back, bitch! Don't think you won't!” Amber shouted then stomped away, her whole right side drenched in my backwash. I buried my face in my hands, not sure if I should cry or laugh. Lexsie came up just as the rest of the crowd started returning to normal, “What happened?” I was still embarrassed to speak, but Savannah wasn't, “Well, you see. Kori decided it would be a good idea to spill Dr. Pepper on Amber and-” “It was an accident!” I practically wailed, both my friends cracked up.

 vvv

 Hours late Jade finally showed up as a green haired vampire. I didn't even have to make introductions, Lexsie and Savannah spotted him the minute he walked through the door, his bright green hair as out of place as Savannah's purple hair or my white locks. When I saw that there would be no awkwardness between the three I went to find Penni. She was surrounded by jocks trying to flirt with her, and she didn't look very pleased at all. I smiled and joined her, “Hey Penni, Jade's here. Do you want to meet him?” I asked. Penni looked at me confused, she had already met Jade before he went back to his own school, and she knew I knew that. I gave her a look, trying to express with my eyes that I was giving her the perfect chance to escape the jock's unwanted attention. She finally got the message and nodded before dragging me away with a force I didn't know she had.

 Of course, we never made it that far. As we walked underneath the upper story walkway, there was a voice shouting, “There she is!” It was followed by a show of ice cold water down on my head. I shrieked at the sudden change in temperature, throwing up my arms to deflect most of the downpour off my poor head. Laughter filled the air, and I was dragged back to the day that Amber had altered the comic I had drawn. Only this was worse, this was physical discomfort.

 Penni was staring at me, mouth open wide and eyes nearly popping out of her head. None of the water hit her luckily. Her gypsy costume was still in tact, but the same could be said for my snow princess dress. It had gone from gleaming white to sheer in .03 seconds, plastered to my body like a second skin. I hastily crossed my arms over my chest, shaking from the cold air that now wafted at my body. Amber appeared before me, taunting, “I told you you'd regret it, little bitch. How does it feel?” Penni glared at Amber and opened her mouth to defend me, but someone else beat her to it, “Amber! That's enough.” Shivering I looked over my shoulder just as Nathaniel wrapped a blanket around my shoulders. His sister backed down with a pout.

 Nathaniel took me to his bedroom. I sat on his bed, the blanket wrapped around me, watching him as he carefully made sure his door was cracked two inches. I couldn't help but smile at that, “I-It won't m-m-ma-matter. The-They w-w-will a-a-a-as-assume the w-w-worst.” I stuttered, my teeth clattering together loudly. Nathaniel didn't answer as he shifted through his drawers and pulled out a pair of grey sweats and a formless white T-shirt. He motioned to a closed door on the other side of the bed, “Bathroom is through there.” I didn't move. I just stared at the pile of clothes he gave me, then up at his golden eyes, “Why do you always help me?” I blurted out.

 Nathaniel blushed a little and looked away sheepishly, “Uh... I guess I feel responsible for what my sister does to you.” He said uncomfortably. I looked back down, disappointed, “...oh...” I stood and moved toward the bathroom to change, but Nathaniel grabbed my arm, “Korianna, wait...” I looked up at him, half hoping half dreading what he would say. Nathaniel studied me for a while before saying, “You know I like you, Korianna. I guess that's the real reason why I want to protect you from my sister's stupid pranks.” I stared at Nathaniel for a minute, my brain trying to catch up to what he just said. Nathaniel blushed even harder and started to let go of me, thinking that I was rejecting him, when I threw my arms around his neck and crashed my lips to his. Surprised he stumbled back a step and I was dragged with him, my feet skittering forward to avoid doing a face plant. Somehow my left foot got wedged behind his right and he tripped over it. To avoid falling to the floor, Nathaniel twisted and we both ended up on the bed, me on top of him, kissing...

 ...just as Melody opened the door.

 The three of us stared at each other for a minute, all of us blushing. Then I bolted off Nathaniel and fled for the bathroom, the clothes he gave me clutched in my arms. I stood leaning against the door, breathing heavily. I could not believe Nathaniel and I had just been caught by the girl who had a crush on him. Castiel seeing us kissing was bad enough, but Melody wasn't one to keep a secret like my brother. She was almost as bad as Peggy when it came to gossip, except when it dealt with Nathaniel. I just hoped her policy of not telling Peggy anything about Nathaniel would cover this incident. I could hear Melody speaking in a chocked tone, “What's going on? I-I came to tell you I was here and she- Did Kori... was she...?” Then came Nathaniel's much calmer voice, “Someone spilled something on Korianna's costume, she came to me for extra clothes.” His voice left no room to question how I had come in his bedroom looking for extra clothes and ended up kissing him. There was a small muffled sob and the sound of a door slamming.

 I finished tugging on the white shirt and tying the sweats tighter around my waist before leaving the bathroom, my wet dress flung over one arm. Nathaniel was standing in the middle of his room, staring down at something in his hands. I peered around him to see a pair of yellow cat ears attached to a head band teetering over his palm. Melody must have given them to him before she left. I gently touched his shoulder, startling him. Biting my lip I looked down, “I'm sorry... I-” Nathaniel pressed a finger to my lips, “You shouldn't be sorry. It's not your fault.” He said softly. I tried a small smile and took the cat ears from him, “These are nice. You should wear them.” I said timidly, trying to change the subject to a safer track.

 Nathaniel snorted, “I don't celebrate Halloween. I think it's stupid.” He said dully and I rolled my eyes, “You would.” I muttered then shoved the car ears down on his head, laughing at his expression of surprise. “There! You know, the ears really look good on you, I think you should wear them from now on.” I said between giggles. Nathaniel frowned at me and tried to pull the ear off, but I swatted his hands away, “No I like them. Leave them in.” Slowly he lowered his hands and didn't try to take them off again. I grinned at the thought that Nathaniel would wear something even if he didn't like it, because he knew I did. Mentally I made a note to tell Tansy I had gone from between Stage 5 and Stage 6 to fully on Stage 6 of her 10 Stages of Relationships. I knew she would be thrilled.

 *CrAzYArtist had signed in*

 $Cha-Ching$: Hey so what happened after the water accident yesterday? No one saw you after that.

 MonKeybiz: Seriously, girl. I know you want to be with your boy, but spend some time with your homeys!

 RabidsingeR: Savannah, don't try to be gangster. It's just atrocious.

 CrAzYArtist: 8 points for Lexsie!

 RabidsingeR: We're not playing Scrabble, Kori...

 GreenThumb: Back on subject... where did you go? I didn't get to even say hi before you disappeared.

 CrAzYArtist: No reason... I just didn't want to be in that house anymore

 $Cha-Ching$: So either you got into a fight with Nath or kissed him again...

 RabidsingeR: I'm going with kissing... At least here's hoping ;P

 CrAzYArtist: Since you'll drag it out of me anyway... Yes, Nath and I kissed again, and Melody walked in on us.

 MonKeybiz: ...Oh snap... doesn't she have a crush on Nath?

 $Cha-Ching$: Yep... ladies and Jade, prepare for World War 3

 CrAzYArtist: Oh come on! Melody and I are rational people, it's not like we'll end up cat fighting in the middle of the hall.

 RabidsingeR: When it comes to guys, all rationality goes out the window.

 $Cha-Ching$: Yeah, I mean look at how Lexsie first treated me for the whole Lysander mess... and she doesn't even like him (not like Savannah)!

 RabidsingeR: THAT WASN'T THE REASON!

 $Cha-Ching$: *read in sarcasm* You're right. It was because Kori forced Castiel into the whole mess, since that makes a whole lot more sense.

 MonKeybiz: Penni you're hilarious!

 RabidsingeR: Grrrrr...

 CrAzYArtist: Get over it, Lexsie.

 GreenThumb: Back on topic girls.

 MonKeybiz: lol, what are you the Topic Police?

 GreenThumb: Yes... don't make me write you a ticket! ^^

 MonKeybiz: I'm shaking in fear, Jade.

 CrAzYArtist: Has anyone seen Violette? She hasn't been on.

 GreenThumb: She was on briefly yesterday while you were getting ready for the party.

 RabidsingeR: Oh... and what did you two... discuss...? Hmm?

 GreenThumb: How nuts you are.

 $Cha-Ching$: 'You' as in all of us, or 'you' as in Lexsie?

 GreenThumb: You as in Lexsie.

 RabidsingeR: Love you too Jade! X(

 MonKeybiz: Okay guys, we have a crisis on our hands. Kori is possibly facing a cat fight with Melody...

 CrAzYArtist: I can handle myself, Savannah...

 RabidsingeR: We all know you can't, Korianna.

 CrAzYArtist: ...

 MonKeybiz: Nice going, dummy.

 RabidsingeR: ...Oops...

 *CrAzYArtist has signed out*

 I glared at the log in sign for ChatRoomzNet, normally I was used to Lexsie's hurtful comments, knowing she didn't really mean them, but that was just too far. Crossing my arms I slouched in my computer chair, but the more I thought about what she said, the more I realized... Lexsie was right. I couldn't take care of myself. It was always my brother or my friends who stepped in when something didn't go right. Now Nathaniel did the same. I closed my eyes wondering if I surrounded myself with people who had an instinct to protect me, so I wouldn't have to do so myself. Did I make friends or bodyguards? I shivered, scared of the answer. Maybe I wasn't so innocent as everyone made me out to be, maybe I was just a manipulative girl and a coward.

 My cell phone buzzed, bringing me out of my self depression. I answered it without thought, “Hello?” “Is this Korianna?” Someone, a guy by the deep tone of his voice, asked. I frowned, wondering who could have gotten my number. “Yeah, who's this?” “Nathaniel... You gave me your number last night, remember?” I shot straight up in my chair, I had forgotten that we had exchanged numbers when he walked me home. I leaned back in my chair, my right hand pressing into my forehead, “Sorry... I didn't add your number in yet, I was too tired last night.” I shut my mouth, knowing I was about to start babbling. There was a pause on the other side of the line, “Korianna... are you alright? You don't sound very happy.” Nathaniel ventured. I mentally cursed, why did Nathaniel have to be so good at guessing someone's emotions? I stayed silent, debating if I should tell him or not. I sighed, unable to lie to the guy who had been nothing but nice to me since I came to Sweet Amoris, “I'm not. I-” Nathaniel cut me off before I could explain “Don't say anything else. I'm coming to pick you up, then you can tell me what's bothering you.” I couldn't help but smile.

 vvv

 “Alright, now what's the matter?” Nathaniel asked after he returned with two ice cream cones, handing me the chocolate one. I licked the frozen dairy, taking my time in answering. When I didn't answer for a while Nathaniel shrugged and leaned back on the bench, eating his own ice cream contently, waiting patiently for me to answer. Crunch! I pulled back realizing I had just ate all my ice cream and was working on the cone now. I was stalling. I sighed and turned to Nathaniel, “Do you... think I'm helpless?” I asked him. The student council president blinked several times, his blonde eyebrows pulled low over the bridge of his nose. Nathaniel shot me a funny look, “What makes you say that?” I sighed and looked down at the remains of my melting cone. “Something Lexsie said earlier, about how I can't take care of myself.” I saw Nathaniel's gold eyes narrow and hurried on before he could say anything, “I think she's right. Looking back, I've never been able to get out of a mess by myself. Lexsie and Castiel were always taking care of my problems. Then Savannah and now you. I can't think of any time I solved a problem by myself.”

 It took forever to Nathaniel to answer. I could tell by his frown that he was still trying not to get angry at Lexsie and failing miserably. Finally he exhaled deeply, his head bent so that his bright blonde hair covered his face, “Do you... want... to not be protected?” I tilted my head, “Huh?” I asked him confused by the question. Nathaniel looked at me, “Do you want your friends not to care about what happens to you?” He asked, his expression unreadable. I shook my head, still confused at what he was asking. Nathaniel closed his eyes and smiled, “Then you have nothing to worry about. We all love you Korianna, that's why we step in, because no one wants to see you hurt.” My eyes widened a fraction at the word 'love' but I shoved that thought out of my mind before it could fully form; now wasn't the time to be thinking like that. I stared at my lap, dimly feeling the cold sludge of chocolate ice cream sliding down my fingers. I hadn't thought of it that way. I pushed a smile on my face, "Alright if you say so..." I murmured. Nathaniel grinned and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer. I blushed, but didn't pull away, I could get used to this...

 vvv

 *CrAzYArtist has signed in*

 RabidsingeR: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! FORGIVE ME! I'll never say another word again!

 CrAzYArtist: Just drop the subject Lexsie...

 $Cha-Ching$: Please! You've been going on and on about this for hours.

 RabidsingeR: You would too if your best friend is super mad at you!

 $Cha-Ching$: First off I wouldn't have even said it. Second, Ken would never be mad at me, it's against his nature.

 MonKeybiz: Well we all thought it was against Kori's nature to get mad enough to LOG OFF!

 GreenThumb: You three are terrible friends. Kori, are you okay?

 CrAzYArtist: Yeah...

 RabidsingeR: It doesn't sound like it! TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG!!!

 MonKeybiz: Seriously? You're the one asking that?

 CrAzYArtist: Nothing's wrong. And Lexsie...

 RabidsingeR: *gulp* ...yes...?

 CrAzYArtist: I'm only forgiving you because it got me a date with Nathaniel.

 RabidsingeR: WHAT?!?!

 $Cha-Ching$: O[]O

 MonKeybiz: GIMME DETAILS WOMAN!!

 GreenThumb: Well what do you know? There IS a silver lining to every thundercloud! CX

 “So then my mum was all for sending me across the Pond to my uncle's home, studying abroad as it were. That's why I'm here.” Tansy explained before class that morning, twirling a strand of her springy brown hair around her finger. She was nodding her head to a song only she could hear, her teeth latching onto her bottom lip, her rabbit earrings bobbing at the motion. Lexsie nodded eagerly, determined just to keep the girl talking so she could listen to Tansy's accent. I would feel sorry for the British girl, if she wasn't so talkative to begin with. Savannah yawned and laid her head on my shoulder, “Wake me when the bell rings.” She mumbled, closing her red eyes for a few extra minutes of sleep. I glanced at my sleepy friend then returned to my sketchpad. It had been a while since I had drawn, not since Amber got a hold of that cursed comic. It was only because Ms. Orion, the art teacher, was determined to make me enter a drawing in some annual art exhibit that I was even drawing. I would have said no, but then the miraculous thing happened and both Nathaniel and Castiel said I should enter something.

 I had decided to continue working on the piece I started when I first moved to Sweet Amoris, the one with Ken and Penni smiling at each other. I filled the blank spaces with pictures of Savannah and Lexsie with their arms around each other's shoulders, both laughing. Opposite of my two friends I had drawn Tansy, her face aglow with the light of her laptop. I erased Nathaniel in the library and replaced it with another picture of him bent over a filing cabinet, leafing through some papers. I also erased Amber and her crew and replaced it with the principal when she was calm and grandmotherly. Now I had a problem of small spaces in between the drawings, too small to be of any use, but big enough that they were noticeable. Tapping my pencil against my lip I tried to think of a way to fill in the spaces. Shading them in would be tacky and would ruin the drawings, clashing with the light shading. Maybe I could smudge the drawing around the edges to get rid of the white spaces. Tilting my head I scanned my drawing, trying to imagine what it would look like. If done correctly the pictures would appear to be coming out of a fog, but it would be hard to get the smudges exact. If I did smudge the drawing, it would probably take up more time than drawing actual pictures.

 “Wow. You're really good.” Penni said behind me, causing me to startle. Savannah grunted and sat up, giving me a bleary-eyed glare. The blonde behind us was still staring at my drawing, more specifically Ken. I shrugged, “I've had a lot of practice.” I said, but I knew she wasn't listening to me, her stormy grey eyes were still on Ken. Tentatively her fingers reached out to graze her best friend's penciled cheek. I watched her, amused. “You know, if you want, I can copy the drawing for you so you can have one of your own...” I offered. Penni gave me a wide eyed look, “Really? Yeah, I'd love one!” She said in a rare show of excitement. I smiled at her and flipped the cover of my sketchpad back over the drawing, “I'll give it to you tomorrow then.” I told her. Savannah leaned against me again, “What about Lysander? Will you draw him for me?” She asked in a sugary sweet tone. I glared at her, “No.”

 vvv

 “I'm eating here.” I said to my friends at the beginning of lunch, pointing to the Student Council Room. My decision earned knowing looks from the girls and a glare from Castiel. Lysander just smirked, he had forgiven me for crashing the date with Penni, but we were just overly polite now. At least he helped Lexsie drag Castiel away, so I could avoid the drama of Nathaniel and Castiel butting heads. Nathaniel looked up when I entered, smiling when he saw who it was, “Hey Korianna.” He said before popping a carrot stick in his mouth. I gave him a flat look, “Carrot sticks? Really, Nathaniel?” I asked. Nathaniel shrugged, “My mom always packed them in my lunches when I was younger. I like them.” He stated nonchalantly, nibbling at another carrot. I shook my head and sat down in the chair to the right of his. “Well, my mom packed brownies. I think I got the better deal.” We both laughed.

 Nathaniel raised an eyebrow at my lunch; a roast beef sandwich, iced tea in a thermos, and a wild berry muffin. I chuckled sheepishly, “I like to cook...” I said sheepishly. It was Nathaniel's turn to shake his head, “Is there anything you're not good at?” I answered him quickly, “School.” It was true. Castiel didn't apply himself at all and managed to make As, I studied hard and still barely made Bs. Nathaniel seemed surprised, “Really?” He asked. I nodded glumly and waited for Nathaniel to start comparing me to my brother, but instead he said, “If you ever need help studying, I can help.” He offered. I shot him a surprised look, seeing that blush of his that I loved. Reaching over I swiped one of his carrot sticks, “Alright, thanks Nathaniel.” I said, biting the stick in half with a Cheshire Cat grin. Nathaniel shot me a dirty look, grumbling something about thief under his breath. I only smiled and finished off my stolen carrot stick.

 vvv

 A hand appeared in the middle of my face, waving. I jerked back, blinking and glared at Penni. The blonde was glaring back at me, “You should really get your hearing checked, girl.” Penni snapped. I began to turn back to the book Nathaniel had loaned me, but Penni snatched it out of my hands before I could focus on its words. “Oh no! You're going to put this book down and converse like a normal person.” Penni said. I crossed my arms, “Study Hall is supposed to be for studying, not talking.” I retorted. Penni scoffed and waved her hand around the room, “And how many people are actually studying? Zero.” I opened my mouth, but my blonde friend cut me off, “You were reading for pleasure, it doesn't count. Besides... if you read you can't read the letter Ken sent me...” Penni finished with a sly grin.

 I suddenly forgot the book, “Give me!” I yelped reaching for the crumbled paper that Penni was waving around. Penni rolled her eyes, “Geez, you're just like a three year old.” She said as she dropped the letter in my grasping hands. I stuck my tongue out at her, but my eyes were already on the scrawling handwriting:

 Hey Pen!

 Got your letter, finally (you wouldn't believe how long the mail takes getting here...). I'm glad I'm still your bestest friend! XP Can you believe how long it's been since we last saw each other? Too long in my opinion! And don't worry, I'm sure we'll see each other again before we're both sixty, maybe fifty-nine, lol. So you finally met Kori? I never got to talk to her in person, but like I said she sure seemed nice. Glad you could rectify that! See what MS is teaching me? 'Rectify' such a wonderful big word. Man I hate it here, it's all 'do this, do that, listen to the Sergeant or get your butt handed to you.' That's a direct quote from one of my MS friends. Her name is also Lexie, like the girl who's a friend of Kori- the one who seems to have it in for you. I've made a total of two friends at MS. Lexie, who is sarcastic and stubborn as a mule at times, but she's a good kid (lol I sound like an old man). Then there's Carson. Ooo Carson... that guy is

 Hey. I'm Lexie. Kentin isn't here right now, and he left this letter in plain sight, he should know better by now that if anything is left in the open, I'm going to be all over it! I'm a raccoon in a sense... MUST. HAVE. SHINY!! lol but it doesn't have to be shiny, just interesting. So, Pen... are you a guy or a girl? To be honest the name doesn't really give anything away, no offense. Kentin really doesn't talk about his life before he came to MS, but then I don't know anyone who does. Sergeant Krisp would probably go on and on about how wussy it would be if someone shared their sob story BC. Sorry, using MS lingo here. BC means 'Before Camp' kinda ironic, no? Ha ha, I sound like a frenchy. So, Pen, have any dirt to share on our good friend Kentin? That kid is as solid as a steel wall when it comes to BC life. I mean, even I'm more open then Kenny-boy and I've had a hard life. Not that I'm going to tell you, I don't even know you! Oops! Gotta go, Kenny is comin' back!

 Sorry about the paragraph above, I'm too lazy to rewrite this letter, and too lazy to scribble out what Lex wrote. Anyway, before Lexie got a hold of this I was talking about Carson. Well, I have to say if you weren't my best friend already, Carson probably would take that title. I think he might be a long lost brother or something... but we look nothing alike so it couldn't be that. Maybe a distant cousin. And yes, I wrote to my mom like you asked *cough cough ORDERED cough cough* I haven't received a reply yet. I wonder if my 'wonderful' father/master burned the letter, he probably did considering contact with someone's mother makes the person a wuss. Sorry, Pen, but MS can make a person bitter. Only the thought of you keeps me me. I know that sounds extremely cheesy, but it's true. You're the only person who ever thought of me as Kentin and not who I should be. That's why you're my bestest friend!

 Say hi to 'Cuddles' for me!

 Kentin Pierce

 P.S. What's this about Kori drawing us? I want to see! Can you send me it? And tell Korianna thanks for doing that.

 4rm Lex: Hey, Pen. So after reading Kenny's letter (behind his back I might add) and concluded that you were a girl (at least I hope), I have to know. Do you like like Kentin? Or are you just 'bestest friends'? Not that I'm trying to move in on your space, girl, just want to know. Cuz if so I'll be keeping the other ladies off Kentin's back. Not that he needs any help, but Kenny-boy is a real catch in MS. Probably the cutest guy here. All the girls swoon at the sight of him! Anyway, send me an answer! Us girls have to stick together and protect our men! ;3 (Kentin's probably going to kill me for this, but I don't care!)

 I set down the letter very slowly, then turned to Penni. “So what did you write in return?” I asked, carefully keeping my tone nonchalant. Penni glared at me, probably mad that I could read her mind so well, and pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper. I unfolded it and turned my back to Penni so she wouldn't see what I was doing.

 Dear Ken,

 I'm glad things are going so well, and that you made friends. Does Lex really call you Kenny-boy to your face? O.o And Lexie, I'm not tell you if I like like Ken or not, I don't want to create any confusions as to how I feel for Ken, besides that information is between him and me alone. But if you feel it necessary to keep other girls off him, go right ahead. Ken, I'm not going to send you the drawing Kori did of us, because I can use it as another incentive to come home, you know... blackmail. X)) Besides seeing me again of course. And also, when did you get so popular? WHERE'S MY DORK AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HIM!?!?!?! lol XD Anyway, me and Lexsie are now relatively good friends, we still have our hard times, but that's because she's a hot head and has a crush on Kori's twin brother (you remember Castiel, right?). Well... I guess that's another long story to save for WHEN you come home, there's a lot of long stories. Like how Kori has a crush on the student body pres Nathaniel Powers and visa-versa (they're such an adorable couple!!) or how there's now a British techie girl going here. Oh! How about the Amber's Halloween Party Mishap? Starring Korianna, Amber, and an accident involving soda... that one is a doozy! I swear, if you put Kori and Amber withing five feet of each other, there's bound to be some interesting (and very amusing) events that will- whatever I completely forgot what I was going to say.

 I scooted a little farther away from Penni and started writing:

 Hiya! This is Korianna West, and this is to Lex (I'm just going to call you that since my own best friend is names Lexsie- with an 's' though): Penni likes Ken. I repeat, Penni likes Ken. She likes him just as much as I like Nathaniel, which is a lot, just sayin'. And since I'm sure Ken is reading this... if you break my friend's heart I'll track you all the way down to Military School and castrate you with a rusty spork. Don't think I won't, after all my twin brother is Castiel! But other than that you're good! ^^ But I still have to approve of you before I give my consent for you to date Penni. Otherwise you're out of luck. So when are you coming back, Ken? Cuz I'm tired of having to chase off idiot boys who thinks they have a chance at our lovely Penni (one of which being my own friend; and boy was Lys pissed at me! O.O). You had better come back and claim what's yours cuz

 The letter was snatched from my hand before I could finish. Penni was standing over me, red in the face. I could almost see the steam coming out of her ears like a cartoon. I smiled at her, “I've got his address now, so I'll just send my note to him if you don't.” I told my friend, knowing how much it would frustrate her. Penni turned even more red, if that were possible; for a moment I thought she would hit me.

 *$Cha-Ching$ has signed in*

 $Cha-Ching$: KORIANNA!

 CrAzYArtist: Really? I thought you already blew all your anger off at me in Study Hall.

 MonKeybiz: Now I'm curious what you did, Kori.

 RabidsingeR: Who isn't?

 GreenThumb: If it has anything to do with boys, then I'm not. Why can't we have a NORMAL discussion?

 MonKeybiz: Because you happen to be the only guy here.

 XxSilentBlossomxX: It is true Jade.

 GreenThumb: Kori! Make Nath join!!!

 RabidsingeR: Really? Then they can just flirt over the internet too.

 CrAzYArtist: Thanks for talking about me like I'm not here. AND WE WOULD NOT!!

 $Cha-Ching$: Hey, I have a crisis here!

 XxSilentBlossomxX: Oh no! What happened?

$Cha-Ching$: Kori wrote to Ken that I like him and then blacked mailed me into sending it.

 CrAzYArtist: Guilty as charged!! X3

 RabidsingeR: ROTFL!!!!

 MonKeybiz: Oh so cruel, Kori. I commend you!

 XxSilentBlossomxX: That wasn't very nice, Korianna...

 GreenThumb: I agree with Violette.

 RabidsingeR: WOULD YOU TWO JUST DATE ALREADY!?!?!?!

 GreenThumb: LEXSIE!

 CrAzYArtist: BTW, did you know Ken apparently has a friend also names Lexie? She doesn't spell it with an 's' though.

 $Cha-Ching$: Kori...

 MonKeybiz: You know, I think Violette fainted...

 RabidsingeR: That could be a valid reason why she's not answering.

 GreenThumb: ...I'm going to murder you one day...

 RabidsingeR: But you won't! ^^

 $Cha-Ching$: Back on topic...

 CrAzYArtist: Oh please, I know you played matchmaker that day you and Nath took me to the mall. Pretty convenient for your parents to show up JUST THEN.

 $Cha-Ching$: …

 MonKeybiz: 1 point to Korianna.

 RabidsingeR: Tell me one person who can out-argue our friend.

 GreenThumb: I can name two- Castiel and Nathaniel.

 MonKeybiz: Oh, touche. :{D lol mustache!

 RabidsingeR: I seriously question your sanity, Savannah...

 MonKeybiz: Why do you and Kori always say that?

 CrAzYArtist: Because it's true!

 RabidsingeR: Like that time you made us perform live in the courtyard of the school! I told you we weren't ready for publicity!

 GreenThumb: Oh geez, here they go again... talk of the old days.

 $Cha-Ching$: You have to admit it is amusing to watch them...

 CrAzYArtist: I don't even know why you made me play along, I can't play an instrument or sing worth a flip.

 RabidsingeR: You're still the prettiest of us three. Plus you were popular back then.

 CrAzYArtist: I'm not the prettiest!!

 MonKeybiz: No I really think you are. Your silver hair and purple eyes really works, makes you look exotic. As opposed to Witch Eyes over here.

 RabidsingeR: Or Goth Girl. Admit it Kori, you're the prettiest!

 CrAzYArtist: AM NOT!

 MonKeybiz: Oh really, then why are you the one with a semi-boyfriend and neither of us have even a smidgen that our crushes even notice our presence?

 RabidsingeR: You might as well agree, when Savannah starts actually making sense you know that she's right.

 CrAzYArtist: I. AM. NOT. THE. PRETTIEST!!

 GreenThumb: She's right. I'm the prettiest, can we change the subject now?

 $Cha-Ching$: XDDDDDDDDDD I think I'm going to die of laughter!!!

 MonKeybiz: ...I don't even know how to respond to that...

 CrAzYArtist: I think Penni has the good idea.

 RabidsingeR: *cough cough* Kori's still the prettiest! *cough cough*

 CrAzYArtist: LEXSIE!!!

 “Ouch!” I yelped and stuck my jabbed pinkie into my mouth to try and suck away the pain. The couple in front of me shot me a strange look, but didn't pay me any other attention. I glared at the pencil that I had pricked my finger on, if it wasn't so important I would have snapped the drawing utensil out of spite. When I was sure that the pencil didn't have any other evil plots up it's sleeve, I grabbed it again, careful to keep the point away from my fingers this time, and started sketching a rough outline of the couple. I had originally meant to spend the day at the park, just drawing scenery, but then someone saw my drawings and asked if I did portraits. I was about to tell him no when the man shoved a ten dollar bill in my hand and sat his girlfriend down in front of me. After that I started up a little business of drawing people for ten dollars a drawing, twenty if they wanted it colored.

 As I began finding the right curve of the woman's cheek, a shadow fell over my drawing pad. I looked up to see a sleazy looking teen, the kind normally found smoking pot down shadowy alleyways, leering down at me, “Hey there... haven't seen you here before.” He sneered. I scrunched my nose up in disgust at his breath, no wonder Castiel didn't like me coming here. The couple frowned at the guy, but didn't move. I was glad, I had already sketched them out and didn't want to ruin the pose. Besides, I could handle one druggie teen. My ex-boyfriend, Ty, was an addict as well, so I knew how to deal with drug heads. “Excuse me, I'm trying to concentrate, can you wait?” I asked politely, though I knew he wouldn't do anything. The sleaze cast a bloodshot glace at my drawing, “You're good... what do you say of drawing me?” He asked, smirking. I wanted to gag. I shot him a look, “Do you have ten bucks?” I knew he didn't, there was no way, and even if he did he probably wouldn't want to pay for a picture.

 Before he could answer someone sat down beside me and threw an arm around my shoulders, “Sorry to keep you waiting, babe. This guy bothering you?” A new guy asked. The couple sighed and I gave them an apologetic look before turning to my rescuer, “Yeah...” I mumbled. The new guy shot Sleazy Druggie a cocky smile, “Begone, and stop bothering my girlfriend.” He ordered airily. Sleazy Druggie gave me a glare, as if it was my fault he had to leave, and slunk away, his greasy dreadlocks dangling low over his face in defeat. False Boyfriend grinned at me when Sleazy Druggie was gone, “So... my name is Kyle, what's yours?” The couple I was drawing groaned, exchanging knowing looks. They thought I was about to hit it off with False Boyfriend, as if. I did smile at him, knowing it would be rude not to at least thank him. “My name is Korianna, thanks for saving me, but I didn't need help.” I said. Kyle seemed to ignore that last part, “Korianna, huh? Nice name. So what are you doing right now?” I gave him a look that said 'I'm on to you', “Being paid to draw. Can I finish this couple please?” I said flatly. Kyle gave me a winning grin, “Sure, I'll go get you some ice cream while you are!” He hopped up before I could tell him no. Sighing I returned to drawing the poor couple, making sure I made it perfect, they deserved to have the best drawing I could give them after waiting patiently.

 Kyle came back just as I handed the couple their finished drawing, two ice cream cones in his hand. He handed me the vanilla one, much to my dismay. At least Nathaniel knew I liked chocolate. Kyle sat down again, too close for my comfort, but considering my side was already pressed against the arm rest of the bench, I had no where to go. Kyle gave me an appraising look, “So, Korianna... where do you go to school, I think I would have noticed your white hair if you went to my high school.” I took a cautious lick of the vanilla ice cream and had to suppress the grimace, I really didn't like vanilla. “I go to Sweet Amoris.” I said nonchalantly. Kyle laughed, “Really? That place is the most drama filled school in this town.” I frowned at the guy, that comment was making him lose points, not that I cared; I was still sitting there because I was too polite to blow him off, especially after he rescued me from Sleazy Druggie. Kyle seemed to catch on to what I was thinking, he faked a cough, “Sorry...” He mumbled, looking sheepish.

 I pretended to check my watch, “Excuse me, but I'm supposed to be meeting my boyfriend for lunch.” I said in a false cheerful tone. Kyle's face fell, leaving no doubt that he had been trying to flirt with me. “Bye!” I called as I walked away, waving over my shoulder as I headed for the cafe across the park. I hadn't ever eaten there myself, but it seems I was the only soul in town that hadn't, even Savannah and Lexsie had been. I was seated almost immediately, given a small two-party table in the back corner of the cafe, near the kitchen. I set my drawing supplies on the table in front of me and ducked behind my menu, lest some other creepy guy decided to hit on me today.

 I hadn't even scanned the first column before my waitress was at my table, asking if I was ready to order. Talk about super service. When I didn't answer right away, she began blathering about today's special and what her favorite meal was. I ended up choosing the special, something called Slammer's Choice, which turned out to be nothing but a fully loaded hamburger, and a chocolate milkshake topped with whipped cream. I was hoping that the milkshake would help tone down on the super sweet vanilla taste still coating my tongue. I opened my drawing pad, intending to work Castiel's birthday present, a drawing of Demon, while I waited for my food.

 “One Slammer's Choice and milkshake.” Someone said a little later, while I was coloring in the right eye of Demon. My head jerked up at the familiar voice and I found myself staring at Nathaniel, looking very odd out of his crisp white shirt and blue tie he always wore at school. “Korianna?” He asked, startled, proving it wasn't just my imagination. I shook my head in disbelief, “You work here? I didn't know that.” Nathaniel blushed and looked away, "Yeah... My father wants me to have a job, and this was the only place hiring." He said sheepishly. I smiled and shook my head again, this time with amusement, "Only you, Nathaniel..." The blonde's eyebrows drew together and he opened his mouth to speak, but I continued before a word could pass his lips, "I used to work at an art supply shop, it's what got me hooked on drawing. Who knows, maybe you'll become a great cook!" "I don't cook the food." Nathaniel said flatly, I shrugged playfully and grinned at him fluttering my eyelashes, "Then you'll be a great host, for when your all rich and famous and host all those fancy parties with your spoiled wife and bratty kids." The look on Nathaniel's face could curdle milk, I hid my milkshake from view just in case he ruined it.

 Just as Nathaniel opened his mouth to speak, a boy our age pokes his head out of the kitchen, “Hey Nate, stop flirting with the pretty girl and come get Table 7's order!” Nathaniel rolled his golden eyes and called back, tucking his serving tray underneath his arm, “Alright, TC, be right there.” The boy, TC, grumbled something under his breath that I didn't catch and disappeared back into the kitchen. Nathaniel looked back at me, “My shift is almost done, do you want to wait around...?” He asked hesitantly. I smiled, “Of course.” I said, I could wait for Nathaniel forever, but I kept that part to myself.

 vvv

 I eagerly licked at my second ice cream cone of the day, this one chocolate. Nathaniel walked beside me, still laughing over my story of the flirting fiasco I had suffered before I ran into him, “I knew you were pretty, Korianna, but-” Nathaniel broke off laughing again. I rolled my purple eyes at him, “I'm going to take that as a compliment and ignore the 'but'. Also, if you ever buy me vanilla ice cream, I won't speak to you ever again.” I said snippishly. Nathaniel started to crack up again. After a while I nudged him in the ribs, “Okay, your turn to tell a funny story.” Nathaniel shrugged, “My day isn't as... interesting as yours.” He said nonchalantly. Having already suffered through one of his failed attempts at a joke, I conceded the point; Nathaniel was too serious to have funny days.

 “Fine, tell me about TC, what's those initials stand for?” I asked, changing the subject. Nathaniel made a face, “Why are you thinking about getting him to flirt with you too?” He teased. I mock glared and swatted his arm, “Speak!” I demanded playfully. Nathaniel laughed and threw his arm over my shoulders and drew me closer, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, “Well, TC's real name Tyrone Cyril, so you can imagine why he goes by his initials.” I snorted, “And I thought Lexsie's full name was bad!” I said between giggles. Nathaniel smirked, “Yes... what is her full name?” I turned my nose in the air, “She made me promise not to tell. A secret is a secret and nothing, not even a kiss, will pry it from me.” I said airily, Nathaniel smirked, “Oh come on, Korianna. I told you TC's real name, and he made me promise never to tell either... I won't tell a soul.”

 I looked my boyfriend up and down, pretending to consider if he was trustworthy or not. Finally I stage whispered, “You promise?” He nodded, trying to act serious, but his lips kept twitching. I glanced left and right and dramatically waved Nathaniel down. Grinning he leaned down until our faces were inches from each other. The air suddenly got a lot tenser and more serious. We stared at each other, aware how close we were. My tongue darted out to wet my lips, and Nathaniel's gold eyes zeroed in on my mouth. I couldn't believe how much I wanted him to kiss me, how much I needed him to. Nathaniel leaned even farther in, so close that I could feel the presence of his mouth, just millimeters from mine. One tiny movement and we would be kissing.

 Nathaniel's eyes flicked back up to my wide ones and he smirked, “I'm not kissing you until you tell me Lexsie's name.” He said, pulling just a little farther away. I glared at him, darn his everlasting sense of cruel jokes. I think he was learning too much from the villains in those mystery books he was always reading. With one last look of surliness, I leaned up and whispered Lexsie's name in Nathaniel's ear, nipping at his earlobe just to get revenge. Nathaniel jerked back, his golden eyes wide with surprise, then he crashed his lips to mine. I guess I lied when I said a kiss wouldn't be able to pry the secret from me, because when Nathaniel finally pulled away from my tender and kiss-swollen lips, I was ready to spill any secret he asked, just so he could kiss me like that again.

 I was trying to concentrate on my English paper due next week when my cell phone buzzed on my bed. It was Savannah, *U better get on ChatRoomz.* I sighed, I had specifically told my friends last night before I logged off that today I wasn't going to get on so I could finish my homework. *Homework, remember?* I texted back. Savannah's answer came quickly, *K, I just thought u might want 2 defend urself. Jades gettin pretty tired of doin the job 4 u* I blinked at the text, was it just me or did Savannah sound mad? I minimized my essay and pulled up ChatRoomzNet, dreading what was going to happen.

 *CrAzYArtist has signed in*

 RabidsingeR: YOU!

 GreenThumb: Finally!

 *GreenThumb has signed out*

 RabidsingeR: HOW COULD YOU?!?!

 CrAzYArtist: Whoa, whoa what did I do?

 $Cha-Ching$: You staying on Savannah?

 MonKeybiz: Yeah... someone needs to be the mediator.

 $Cha-Ching$: Alright then I'm out, text me when the chat room is safe again.

 *$Cha-Ching$ has signed out*

 MonKeybiz: Will do!

 RabidsingeR: Korianna Rillei West, who did you tell!?

 CrAzYArtist: WHO DID I TELL WHAT?!

 RabidsingeR: My ****ing name!

 MonKeybiz: Hey hey, let's keep it PG.

 RabidsingeR: Butt out, Savannah! It's none of your business.

 MonKeybiz: Are you sure Kori is even the person who told?

 RabidsingeR: Because she's the only person who actually knows my full name besides my PARENTS!

 I gulped staring at the screen and suddenly understanding what Lexsie was so upset about. I quickly swiveled my chair around so I wasn't facing the computer and texted Nathaniel *Please tell me you didn't tell anyone Lexsie's full name...* It was a long moment before he answered *No, why?* *Because someone must of overheard us and told everyone else. I'm dead* Nathaniel took a while in answering, *I doubt Lexsie will kill you.* *Well if I don't show up Monday you know who to blame. I have to deal with this mess now. Bye* *Good luck O.o* I turned back to the computer screen and grimaced. I hadn't spent more than a minute texted Nathaniel but Lexsie was already shouting at me again

 RabidsingeR: KORIANNA YOU COWARD, COME BACK AND FACE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE!!!!!

 MonKeybiz: Castiel might have had something for her to do. She hasn't logged out.

 RabidsingeR: KORIANNA!! Get your butt back on and take it like a woman!

 CrAzYArtist: I'm back. Geez I had to ask Nathaniel something, sorry!

 RabidsingeR: What did you ask him? If he told anyone my name?

 CrAzYArtist: ...yes...

 MonKeybiz: Kori! O.O

 RabidsingeR: WHAT?!?!? You actually did tell your boyfriend my topmost secret in the universe?! You promised never to tell!

 CrAzYArtist: It's a name, Lexsie.

 RabidsingeR: SO? You made a promise never to tell, and guess what, *****, you did!

 MonKeybiz: Hey hey, PG remember?

 CrAzYArtist: It's Nathaniel I told, do you really think I would just share with anyone? You can trust Nathaniel, he can keep a secret.

 RabidsingeR: Yeah sure, that is why Amber texted me about my name this morning? Because your boyfriend can keep a secret?

 *SBPrez has joined the Chat Room*

 CrAzYArtist: She must have overheard us!

 RabidsingeR: Uh-huh, sure. You told her AND Nathaniel! I know you did.

 CrAzYArtist: Are you even listening to yourself? I hate Amber, why would I ever tell her anything besides 'get lost'?

 RabidsingeR: Because you are always defending her when I try to talk bad about her.

 CrAzYArtist: That's because I hate gossip and you know it!

 RabidsingeR: I don't know anything about you Korianna West. I thought you were a promise keeper, but obviously you're not!

 CrAzYArtist: You are over reacting, Lexsie. It is a NAME!

 RabidsingeR: That you know I hate!

 CrAzYArtist: You know what I find amusing? You have no qualms of spilling other people's secrets, say... Jade's crush on Violet, but I dare whisper your real name and suddenly I'm the most horrible person on Earth!

 RabidsingeR: Well, if the shoe fits.

 CrAzYArtist: Alright, hypocrite. I'm the most horrible person on Earth. I should just bow down to you and beg for forgiveness for all eternity, because it's obvious that I will never be able to redeem myself.

 RabidsingeR: What did you call me?

 CrAzYArtist: Are you so incompetent that you don't understand the word 'hypocrite'? I'll try to spell it out so you can understand: It means that you can do anything you want but God forbid someone else do the same thing. Do you understand now?

 MonKeybiz: Kori... calm down.

 CrAzYArtist: You asked me to defend myself, I am. So BUTT OUT!

 RabidsingeR: Geez, aren't you defensive when your little innocent image is at stake. You know I'm glad I found out what you were really like so now I can just avoid you.

 CrAzYArtist: I guess you'll have to give up your foolish dreams about Castiel then, since he is my twin.

 SBPrez: BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!

 MonKeybiz: Hey who are you? This is a private chat room, how did you get in here!?

 SBPrez: I'm Nathaniel.

 RabidsingeR: Great, did you tell your boy to come and defend you, Korianna? Two against one is it? You're a coward.

 SBPrez: Korianna didn't invite me. Penni did. She thought I could give a better explanation.

 RabidsingeR: I'm all ears, traitor.

 SBPrez: Alright. I blackmailed Kori to tell me. She tried to not tell me, but I got it out of her. She also made sure no one was around before she told me and whispered your name in my ear.

 RabidsingeR: So how did that *****y sister of yours know my name?

 SBPrez: -_- When I asked her about it, Amber admitted to breaking into the Student Council Room and stealing some student files. She happened to grab yours, Lexsie.

 *RockStar has signed in*

 RockStar: So Penni told me to get on and break up a fight between Lexsie and Kori... My solution: Stop butting heads and forgive each other already. And Kori, it's your turn to make dinner.

 SBPrez: Oh great...

 RockStar: Please tell me that isn't who I think it is.

 MonKeybiz: *gulp* Why am I suddenly in the middle of two fights?

 CrAzYArtist: Lexsie?

 RabidsingeR: What?

 CrAzYArtist: Call a truce so we can watch Nath and Castiel fight? :)

 RabidsingeR: ...alright...

 SBPrez: Sorry to disappoint you, slacker.

 RockStar: Say that to my face, Goody Two Shoes.

 SBPrez: Gladly. You're reading the computer screen, so I said it to your face.

 RockStar: I MEANT IN PERSON!!!!

 SBPrez: I'm typing this in person, slacker. So I'm saying it in person.

 RockStar: Stop being a ****

 SBPrez: Gladly, when you do the same.

 RockStar: GRRRRRRRRRR!!!! You're dead tomorrow Mr. Goody-goody!

 SBPrez: You've been saying that for years, West.

 RockStar: Well this time it's real, Powers.

 CrAzYArtist: Ah, be silent both of you before I come after you!

 SBPrez: Fine.

 RockStar: HA! You're whipped, goody-goody!

 I glared at my brother's response, he was going to regret that. I dug around my drawing until I came up with a small silver whistle. Sticking it in the corner of my mouth I began blowing with each breath as I continued to watch Nathaniel and Castiel fight between them. Demon began barking like crazy and I could hear loud crashing downstairs. My brother started yelling at me, but I was too busy blowing on the whistle to answer. Finally he typed on ChatRoomz:

 RockStar: KORIANNA RILLEI WEST!!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!

 MonKeybiz: Huh? She's not doing anything.

 CrAzYArtist: I'm blowing a doggy whistle. I thought I told you to stop fighting.

 RockStar: **** it, Kori!

 SBPrez: Hey, watch your language.

 RockStar: Oh I remember when you used to say that, goody-goody. Don't deny it.

 SBPrez: Shut up...

 CrAzYArtist: Do I smell a back story?

 RabidsingeR: Tell tell!

 RockStar: Never.

 SBPrez: For once I agree with West, I'm not telling. And you were stupid, slacker, to believe her over me.

 RockStar: Oh was I? I saw you, Goody Two Shoes!

 SBPrez: Ever thought that it was her fault?

 RockStar: She wouldn't ever do anything like that!

 SBPrez: You obviously didn't know her then.

 RockStar: I'm sure you knew her.

 SBPrez: As much as I would say I did just to annoy you, that would be lying.

 RockStar: Yeah, right.

 RockStar: KORI STOP BLOWING THAT **** WHISTLE!!

 CrAzYArtist: Then stop arguing with my boyfriend. And Nathaniel, stop arguing with my brother.

 SBPrez: You don't have a whistle to bother me with.

 CrAzYArtist: I'm not kissing you again if you continue.

 SBPrez: ...fine...

 MonKeybiz: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you got him there, Kori!

 RockStar: *gag* I think I'm going to vomit.

 RabidsingeR: I'm still mad at you, but I have to say that is perfect blackmail.

 CrAzYArtist: I should know, that's what Nath used to get me to tell him your name.

 RabidsingeR: In that case... I guess I forgive you. Kisses are hard to abstain from.

 “So... how bad do you think it will be?” Lexsie asked me and Castiel as we started up the stairs towards Sweet Amoris. My brother shrugged, not commenting. I tried to keep an optimistic view on it all, “Well, not many people really like Amber, so they will probably zone her out if she tries to talk to them and-” I cut off abruptly when the three of us entered the main hallway, my mouth dropping open a little at the sight of the redecorated halls. Everywhere there was papers taped to the lockers and walls, scattered over the floors, and in neat stacks by the doors. Every last one had Lexsie's student ID photo and her full name printed in capital letters across the page in red ink. If that wasn't injury enough, drooping from the ceiling was a white banner that said LEXSIE LIARD IS LEXSINGTON CONCORD LIARD!!* Castiel and I exchanged worried looked over Lexsie's head then looked down at our friend. She actually looked like she was going to cry.

 Some jerk spotted us standing there at the entrance of the school and shouted, “Hey! There's the Walking History Book!” Everyone standing in the hall started laughing. Castiel glared and stalked towards the source of the jerk, murder written clearly on his face. Everyone made a clear path for my brother, giving me a clear view of the idiot who opened his mouth and signed his death warrant. I only knew it was him because Lysander had the guy by the collar, the usually laid back musician looking about as murderous as Castiel. Seeing that the boys had it handled, I nudged Lexsie towards the Student Council Room, knowing that she would be able to escape the scrutiny there. This reminded me too much of my own problem when Amber decided to doctor my art and show her work to everyone else.

 Nathaniel glanced up when we entered the room, his gold eyes serious. He didn't say anything as I forcibly sat Lexsie down in one of the chairs, since she was too stunned to do so herself. I walked over to my boyfriend, “Is there anything you're doing?” I whispered, with a cautious look to Lexsie. She just sat there, her green eyes hazed over as every nightmare over her name probably came to life. I felt sorry for my best friend, nothing could compare to having your worst nightmares realized. Nathaniel looked at Lexsie as well before saying quietly, “I already had my sister suspended. Someone went to get a ladder to take that stupid banner down and Savannah, Penni, Iris and Lysander are collected the fliers as we speak.” I nodded and sat down beside him with a sigh, “Man... I don't want to deal with this.” I grumbled to myself. Nathaniel reached out and took my hand, “You need to be there for Lexsie. She was there for you when Amber bullied you.” He said. I nodded slowly, he was right of course. He always was when it came to things like this.

 My brother burst in at that moment and Nathaniel dropped my hand quickly. I schooled my face so not to show the hurt as I turned to my brother. Castiel was glaring at Nathaniel, for whether he saw us holding hands or for another reason (which was plausible), “I'm taking Lexsie home.” He growled, it wasn't a question. Nathaniel narrowed his own golden eyes, “You don't have guardianship over her. She cannot leave without parental consent.” I sighed, of course the two boys in my life would find something to argue over in the midst of a crisis. Lexsie didn't even seem to acknowledge that she was being talked about, she sat in her chair as still as a statue. As I watched her, my friend drew in a shuddering breath, like those when you were crying, and burst into tears.

 Nathaniel and Castiel halted in their argument to stare at Lexsie, both looking extremely uncomfortable to be in the presence of a girl's tears. I glared at them both for being idiots before I sat down beside Lexsie and pulling her into my arms. Lexsie didn't notice, she just continued to sob. Fat tears rolled down her face, leaving black trails from her mascara as huge gasping wails shook her body. Her hands were curled up in front over her, as if trying to hold her heart in. I shushed her, petting away her shoot green highlighted black hair away from her wet cheeks. Lexsie continuously shook, like a small dog in the cold. her face turning blotchy red. Crying was never beautiful, no matter how many movies made them. It was an ugly business, to be seen only by those closest to you. But even I had never seen Lexsie cry, she was an impenetrable wall, holding all tears inside to be saved for a later time.

 I shot a nasty glare over my shoulder at Castiel and Nathaniel, who still stood there dumbly, staring at poor Lexsie. Guys should never see a girl cry, it was an unwritten rule. Especially when one of the guys happened to be a crush. Nathaniel was the first to recover, probably used to seeing Amber cry over nothing, he practically had to shove a still stunned Castiel out of the room, shutting the door behind him. The faint click of the door shutting sent Lexsie into a full out bawling fest, it was as if she had been waiting for the boys to leave so she could let her reservoir of tears loose. I just held my friend tightly, knowing that no words or friendly gestures could stop such a flood.

 ...

 $Cha-Ching$: So... you think she's getting on?

 MonKeybiz: Probably not.

 CrAzYArtist: Castiel took her out for ice cream, because ice cream makes everything better.

 MonKeybiz: I worry about your philosophy sometimes, Kori.

 CrAzYArtist: It's not mine! It's a West family belief!

 $Cha-Ching$: All of you West's are strange.

 GreenThumb: Remind me never to meet your parents...

 SBPrez: I wish I could say the same.

 CrAzYArtist: If you want to truly date me, Nathaniel Powers, then you have to meet my dad. It's the law.

 SBPrez: It is not the law.

 CrAzYArtist: It is in the West family. My father has to approve of every single guy I ever date.

 MonKeybiz: So how did Ty pass the Great Test of the Century?

 CrAzYArtist: Don't get snarky with me... and that little prick could charm a homeless man into giving up his last pair shoes.

 SBPrez: So why did you two break up?

 MonKeybiz: Oh you know, cheated on Kori then tried to make it as if she was the reason he cheated. The usual stuff.

 GreenThumb: Ouch.

 MonKeybiz: Yeah, Lexsie knocked a few of his teeth out when she heard about it.

 SBPrez: Should I be worried?

CrAzYArtist: Just don't screw up and you'll be fine. But Lexsie would be the least of your worries if you ever did anything to hurt me. I know Castiel is looking for a chance to lay into you.

 SBPrez: WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON?!?!?!?!

CrAzYArtist: My side. CX

 MonKeybiz: Okay lovebirds, we have a serious crisis on our hands. What are we going to do about Lexsie?

 CrAzYArtist: I'm sure if something evil happened to you the best thing to cheer you up would be to go get ice cream with Lysander. Trust me, it's being handled.

 MonKeybiz: ...I hate you...

 $Cha-Ching$: Is it bad that I'm laughing so hard?

 GreenThumb: No... So Penni, any news from Ken?

 $Cha-Ching$: o///////o HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT?!?

MonKeybiz: Kori have you been spilling secrets again?

 CrAzYArtist: I take offense to that.

 SBPrez: I thought we cleared this up last night.

 MonKeybiz: Nath stop standing up for your girlfriend! Let her answer the question.

 CrAzYArtist: I did Savannah. I said I take offense to that, meaning NO!

 SBPrez: Nath?

 $Cha-Ching$: You're name takes to long to spell out, so we shorten it on chat.

 SBPrez: Savannah's name is only a letter shorter than mine...

 CrAzYArtist: But her name shortened sounds weird. Savan doesn't have a ring to it.

 MonKeybiz: Plus it sounds like a guys name...

 SBPrez: So... Savannah is the only person who doesn't have a nickname?

 CrAzYArtist: And Castiel and Jade and Ken.

 $Cha-Ching$: Actually Ken's real name is Kentin, so yes he had a nickname.

 SBPrez: I wasn't counting Castiel.

 CrAzYArtist: You might as well start, buster. He's my brother which means your going to be seeing him a lot.

 MonKeybiz: Careful what you say, Nath, Kori loves her brother.

 SBPrez: Don't call me Nath, please.

 MonKeybiz: Why not?

 SBPrez: Reasons I don't wish to share yet.

 CrAzYArtist: You're just as closed off as Castiel sometimes.

 GreenThumb: Oooooooooo, burn!

 SBPrez: Shut up Jade...

 MonKeybiz: Well I'm not going to stop calling you Nath until you tell me. So there!

 *RabidsingeR has signed in*

 CrAzYArtist: LEXSIE! How are you feeling?!

 RabidsingeR: better... you're right, Kori. That ice cream philosophy works wonders.

 CrAzYArtist: HA! Take that suckers!

 MonKeybiz: We never said you were wrong.

 $Cha-Ching$: Just strange.

 GreenThumb: And that we never wanted to meet your parents.

 SBPrez: *eye roll* All of you are nuts. Why do I get on is beyond me.

 *RockStar has signed in*

 SBPrez: Bye, Korianna! See you at school!

 *SBPrez has signed out*

 RockStar: At least I don't have to deal with that goody-goody tonight.

 CrAzYArtist: You do realize how stupid you sound when you call him a 'goody-goody' right?

 RockStar: Shut it, Kori.

 CrAzYArtist: NEVER!!! Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!

 RockStar: I'm not related to you.

 CrAzYArtist: So... you don't want to be with your non-related family when Nathaniel meets Dad?

 RockStar: I'm related to you again.

 CrAzYArtist: Too bad! You're not going! XD

 MonKeybiz: Hey, let someone else have a chance to speak, CRH!

 $Cha-Ching$: CRH?

 GreenThumb: What does that mean?

 RabidsingeR: Oh, you two aren't new to the chat room atmosphere. CRH means Chat Room Hogs. It's for people who take all the spotlight

 CrAzYArtist: I think they got that without the explanation, Lexsie...

 RockStar: KORI! Stop being a prick.

 CrAzYArtist: A. Who are you and what have you don't with my brother? B. Who are you and WHAT ON EARTH HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY BROTHER!? C. I'm not going to be pussyfooting around her. That is the last thing she needs.

 MonKeybiz: Awwwww, Castiel is so cute when he's all protective.

 CrAzYArtist: Castiel stop cursing, you're burning my ears.

 RockStar: I'LL STOP WHEN YOU STOP BLOWING THAT **** DOG WHISTLE!!!!

 CrAzYArtist: It's the only way to make you behave. Besides, it keeps Demon happy.

 MonKeybiz: It is effective.

 RockStar: Kori, go to bed before I call Mom and tell her you're still up.

 GreenThumb: You still have a bed time? Even when both of you live without adults supervision?

 CrAzYArtist: There's a flaw in your plan, Castiel. When on earth has Mom EVER enforced our bedtime? And I know you won't call Dad, because you'll both just start arguing.

 RockStar: STOP BLOWING THAT GOD**** WHISTLE!

 CrAzYArtist: Then stop being stupid. I have homework anyway, good night everyone! (except Castiel)

 GreenThumb: You don't think she's mad right?

 MonKeybiz: Kori? Naw, the twins just like arguing for fun. It's actually kinda funny.

 RockStar: Shut up Lucky...

 MonKeybiz: YOU PROMISED NEVER TO USE THAT NICKNAME AGAIN!!!

 *CrAzYArtist has signed off*

 I shook my head and shut down my computer. As I pulled out my math textbook to work on the problems due Friday, my phone buzzed. I glanced at it then smiled when I saw what Nathaniel sent me. *Sweet dreams, Korianna* I unlocked my phone and texted back: *Don't let the bedbugs bite ;)* Though I had only been dating him for a few weeks, my relationship with Nathaniel was already better than that of Ty. I hoped it continued that way.

 Monday we were back at school, a mass of yawning zombies just wishing for those ten more minutes in our heavenly bed. Everyone except Nathaniel of course. He was bright eyed and energetic when I came stumbling in the Student Council Room, groggy like always. My golden haired boyfriend raised an eyebrow as I plopped down in the closest chair, “When do you go to bed, Korianna?” He asked as he returned to his task of filing away a file. I raised my head a little from the table to glare at him, “Less talking, more sleeping.” I spat. Nathaniel, bless his soul, didn't respond. I laid my head down on the table again, letting a small happy sigh escape my lips. There was fifteen minutes to the morning bell, maybe I could get at least ten minutes of dozing if I just laid there, thinking of how tired I was...

 The door burst open, “Nathaniel! You wouldn't believe- Oh.” I twisted around to glare at Melody. Lexsie, Penni, and Iris all stood behind her. Lexsie was the only one who wasn't surprised, she just giggled behind her hand. Lexsie knew I wasn't a morning person, and she found great amusement when other people discovered how grouchy I could really be. I saw Nathaniel roll his eyes in my peripheral vision, “Korianna, try going to bed earlier if you can't get enough sleep.” He said. I shot him a glare as I laid my head back down, grumbling, “Tell Castiel that, then maybe he would stop playing the stupid guitar at midnight.” Luckily Nathaniel didn't hear me. No need to give him another reason to hate my twin.

 vvv

 “And so... if you carry the two, you will get that the function of the graph equals...” Mr. Gordon said monotonously. Half of the class was already nodding off, their eyes drooping closed, while the other half of the class were keeping themselves entertained with whatever. Only the geeks who found mathematics fascinating were actually paying any attention to Mr. Gordon. Even Nathaniel, sitting a row over and a seat ahead of me, was only half listening. He held his pen in one hand, but his eyes were on the book he was reading, hidden carefully behind the student sitting in front of him. I dug my fingers into my white hair and yanked subtly, trying to wake myself up, as I continued to doodle all over my math notes.

 Charlotte, Amber's friend, leaned over to whisper to me, “Hey, did you get question five on the Physics homework?” I glanced at her, Charlotte was actually okay when she wasn't with the two other members of the Terrible Trio. Although, Penni was convinced Li was the nicer of the three. Still, neither couldn't be as bad as Amber. Charlotte had been a little nicer to me since the cruel prank Amber pulled with the artwork. I pulled out my homework and quickly passed it to Charlotte when Mr. Gordon wasn't looking. I knew helping Charlotte would be helping Amber in a way, but I didn't care. “Here, I don't know if it's correct or not, though. I haven't had a chance to ask Nathaniel.” I whispered to Charlotte. She smiled her thanks and snatched the paper quickly just as Mr. Gordon was turning around.

 “Korianna West. What is the answer to the problem?” The teacher asked. I felt something shrivel up and die, “Uhhh...” Was the only sound that came out of my mouth. Of all my subjects, I was worse at math more than anything. Instinctively I glanced at Nathaniel. My boyfriend was half looking over his shoulder, the corner of his mouth that I could see was tilting up in a pitying smile. One of the geeks was waving his hand wildly in the air, his eyes wide with determination to answer the question. Mr. Gordon ignored him, no one but the person he called on could ever answer the question, his beady little eyes glaring at me, “We're waiting, Miss West.” “X equals x squared over four x to the fifth.” Everyone turned to see who dared disobey Mr. Gordon's orders. Not only was Mr. Gordon the most boring teacher in the history of school, he was also the evilest.

 Mr. Gordon glared at Castiel who was hunched over in the back of the room, lolling across the desk. It was obvious he had just woken up. Lexsie, sitting to the right of him, had her eyes glued to her notebook. She didn't like being called out by teachers, having a fear of speaking in front of a crowd greater than ten. “Castiel West, have you been sleeping in this class?” Mr. Gordon asked my brother. Castiel, being Castiel, smirked, “Yeah... could you tone down on the talking? It's disturbing my sleep.” In one movement everyone turned to look at Mr. Gordon, who was looking very red. I could almost see the steam rolling off him. Nathaniel didn't look very pleased either, I knew he had a big thing about respect. Right then, I didn't care. I wasn't in the spotlight anymore, my twin had taken the hit and that's what twins are for.

 vvv

 “So where were all of you this weekend? You didn't even get on ChatRoomz!” I asked over lunch. Savannah shifted in her seat, her face downcast. The picture of guilt. Penni quickly shoved another slice of roast beef into her mouth, preventing her from answering. Lexsie was the only one who looked me in the eye, “We all went to Melody's birthday party.” She said flatly, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. And it would have been, had Melody not have a crush on my boyfriend, “Wait, what?” I asked, not sure I heard her right. Savannah pipped up, “We didn't go because we wanted to! We thought we would find out why Melody liked Nathaniel or whatever.” She looked frantic, her purple hair actually frizzing out of her braids as she spoke. Lexsie shot her a look, “Savannah's right. We only went to tell Melody that her little crush was useless.”

 I blinked and sat back, “Let me guess, the reason why I didn't even know of the party was because Melody didn't want me to know... right?” I asked. My three friends exchanged looks. I rolled my eyes, “You could have told me you were going. It makes you look stupid that you didn't.” Penni ducked her head, “I know... we weren't thinking. Forgive us?” I stared at each friend for a long time, until all three were uncomfortable. Then I grinned, “I will... if you have anything interesting to tell me.” “Lysander has a tattoo on his back! Rosalya told me!” Savannah blurted out. Lexsie smacked her upside the head, “Dummy, we're not supposed to tell.” I shook my head, “Not interested anyway.” “Capucine said some very rude things about you.” Penni added. I rolled my eyes, “I don't care what that wannabe thinks of me.” I said then turned to Lexsie sitting directly across from me. This was their last chance to redeem themselves. I would forgive them anyway, I just wanted to tease them a little. Lexsie smirked, “I know why Amber has a crush on Castiel. And it has something to do with Nathaniel.”

 I perked up and leaned forward, now that was interesting. Lexsie giggled, “First of all, explain how Castiel and Amber could know each other when they were younger.” I sighed, “My family is actually from here, but we moved when Castiel and I were about four.” Savannah conceded the point, “That would explain why Castiel chose to live here when your dad kicked him out...” She muttered to herself. I ignored her and pointed at Lexsie, “Speak, firecracker.” My black haired friend glared at me, but said, “Now I don't know the full details, but apparently Nathaniel and Castiel are like polar opposites of what they are now. Nathaniel was supposedly the bad boy and Castiel the perfect angel.” I rolled my eyes again, “Well duh, you grew up with us, remember? Castiel was really nice when we were younger. It wasn't until junior high that he went all crazy.” Lexsie waved her hand and continued, “Well the story goes along the lines of Nathaniel broke Amber's doll or whatever and Castiel fixed it. She's had a crush ever since.”

 Penni snorted, “If she wasn't such a bitch, I'd say it was cute...” She grumbled. I didn't bother to snap at her for her swearing. What she said was true. Lexsie huffed and crossed her arms, “Besides, it's cruel to support Amber being with Castiel when one of your own friends has a crush on him.” “Who has a crush on me?” Castiel asked from behind me. I nearly jumped three feet in the air and turned to see Castiel staring down at us girls, eyebrows raised curiously, with Lysander watching behind him looking extremely amused. Lexsie miraculously didn't seem fazed by it, “None of your business, West.” Castiel smirked at her as he sat down beside me, across from Penni, “Someone has a crush on me, I think it is my business.” I tuned the conversation out as the two started debating if it was Castiel's right to know who was crushing on him or not. Lysander sat down in front of Savannah, “Nice dress.” He commented. Savannah, going all shy once more, eeped and blushed. My eyes darted between the two as a sly grin pushed up the corners of my mouth, this was getting interesting.

 …

 *$Cha-Ching$ has signed in*

 CrAzYArtist: Savannah and Lys sitting in a tree!

 RabidsingeR: K I S S I N G!

 CrAzYArtist: First comes love!

 RabidsingeR: Then comes MARRIAGE!

 MonKeybiz: SHUT THE HELL UP YOU TWO!

 CrAzYArtist: THEN COMES BABIES IN A BABY CARRIAGE!!!!!

 RabidsingeR: One with white hair and one with black,

 CrAzYArtist: And two adopted aunts who've got your back!

 MonKeybiz: ...jerks...

 $Cha-Ching$: Uh... what did I miss?

 RockStar: Oh, Kori and Lexsie are just teasing Savannah about Lysander. Ever since we all logged on.

 SBPrez: It's starting to get annoying.

 RockStar: For once, I agree with you Powers.

 GreenThumb: The universe must be ending...

 RockStar: Jade, I will end you.

 CrAzYArtist: Hey! Stop terrorizing my friends, Castiel!

 MonKeybiz: Oh he can't, but you can?!

 RabidsingeR: What you didn't like our song? I'm hurt

 MonKeybiz: Not yet you're not... when I get through with the both of you you'll know what hurt really means!

 RabidsingeR: RUN! Lucky is making threats!!

 MonKeybiz: LEXSSSSSSSSSSSSIE!!!!!!! Stop using that name!

 CrAzYArtist: What name, Lucky?

 RockStar: Alright you two, as amusing as it is to see Savannah angry, dial it down.

 RabidsingeR: Phooey, I hate it when you get all responsible, Castiel...

 MonKeybiz: He needs to be if he ever marries you...

 RabidsingeR: SAVANNAH!

 RockStar: What?

 GreenThumb: I shouldn't be laughing so hard...

 $Cha-Ching$: You're not the only one... XDDDDDDDD

 CrAzYArtist: Lexsie and Castiel sitting in a tree!

 MonKeybiz: K I S S I N G!

 CrAzYArtist: First comes love!

 MonKeybiz: Then comes MARRIAGE!

 CrAzYArtist: THEN COMES A BABY IN A BABY CARRIAGE!

 MonKeybiz: And one of the hip!

 CrAzYArtist: And one pulling Castiel's hair!

 MonKeybiz: And one running naked through the streets!

 SBPrez: Now I'm worried...

 RabidsingeR: SAVANNAH KNIGHT! KORIANNA WEST!

 I was just about to type out my answer when I heard Castiel roaring my name as his footsteps thundered up the stairs. I winced, maybe it wasn't just a good idea to tease someone when they were under the same roof.

 CrAzYArtist: NATHANIEL! I need a get away! Castiel's coming to kill me! Meet you at the park!

 SBPrez: *sigh* the things I do for you... fine

 *CrAzYArtist has signed out*

 *SBPrez has signed out*

 After snapping my laptop closed I grabbed a pair of sandals and climbed out of the window and onto the fire escape just as my brother began beating against my locked door, “Korianna Rillei West! You are dead, do you understand me?! Say your last prayers, pest, because I'm going to kill you and send you back home in a box!” I laughed as I started for the fire escape ladder, “You're just repeating yourself Castiel. Can't you make up a better threat. By the way, I'll be home whenever!” I didn't hear his response as I quickly descended the ladder, barely escaping with my life.

 “I wish you would put something on that covered you more.” Castiel muttered for the hundredth time. I rolled my eyes, “Look buster. You're not my father so you can keep your comments to yourself.” I snapped, not bothering to look up from the book I was reading. Castiel glared at me, “No, but I am your older brother and the one responsible for you since Mom and Dad live in another town.” I pushed my sunglasses farther up my nose and ignored him. He was only older by two minutes, so it really shouldn't count, but I knew if I told Castiel that he'd start getting logical on me and I didn't want that. It was summer vacation and after much begging I finally managed to drag Castiel down to the beach. I was starting to regret my decision since all he did was throw a tantrum over my bikini bathing suit.

 The false red head opened his mouth, no doubt to start another round of bikini lectures and the danger of lustful teenage boys, when I ripped my sunglasses off to glare at him, “Look, before you say another word, just think of your reaction if Lexsie would come marching up here in a even skimpier black bikini.” I snapped, shoving an accusing finger at my brother's bare chest. Castiel glared at me, but shut his mouth. So he knew that that would be a pointless argument to get into. I smirked, “Good, cuz here she comes.” I said slyly and pointed over my twin's shoulder to the black haired girl sauntering up to us. I don't know who's reaction was more amusing when Castiel turned around: Lexsie's bright blush or Castiel's mouth dropping open. I cackled, “Need to step into the cold ocean for a moment, Castiel?” I asked sweetly and got two equally dirty looks from both Castiel and Lexsie. I just smiled as I returned to my book. And here I thought I wasn't going to get a chance to play matchmaker.

 “I thought you went home with Savannah.” Castiel commented to Lexsie as she sat down at the edge of my beach towel, her back facing me. Lexsie shrugged, “I was, but I figured it would be more fun here then at home with my parents nagging at me to get a summer job.” I sighed exaggeratedly, “Poor Savannah... she doesn't get to be around her crush all summer.” “KORI!” Lexsie screeched and turned to me, her face red. I grinned up at my best friend, “What? I was just commenting that she won't be able to hang out with Lysander, is all.” I said innocently. Lexsie glared at me, she knew what and who I really meant. Castiel, being the blockhead that he was, looked confused, “Savannah likes Lys?” He asked. I rolled my eyes at him, “Well duh, why do you think Lexsie and I made up that song to sing to her on ChatRoomz?” I asked. Castiel shrugged, “Because you two are idiots. I'm going to walk Demon.” My brother said as he stood, the dog's leash already in his hand. Demon pranced around his master's legs, panting happily. Castiel started walking away before something made him stop, he turned back to Lexsie and I, “Oh and... I'm not going to help you crash another date for him, got it?” Castiel growled. I smiled happily and waved my hand, “Don't worry, I want them together. They're perfect for each other. Go, walk your slobber monster, and try not to get dragged in the dust.” I said. Castiel gave me a sour look before walking off, Demon already pulling hard on his leash, wanting to run.

 Once my brother was out of earshot, Lexsie turned on me, “I can't believe you did that!” She hissed. I smiled as I turned over on my stomach, and opening my book, “Oh boo-hoo, he didn't notice I was talking about you. Castiel is a hard head, remember? And very dense when it comes to girls that like him. Remember Amanda? Or Christie?” Lexsie humphed and crossed her arms in a pout, “Yessss...” She ground out, no doubt trying to forget those awful snotty girls who thought they were in love with Castiel. Their mistake was they were cruel to Lexsie and me, whom Castiel was very protective over, and thus ruining their chances of every landing a date with the 'hottest guy in school'. I grinned and continued listing off names, “Or Georgia? Or Jessica? Or Sarah? Or Renee? Or-” “I get it!” Lexsie snapped and I broke off with a giggle. My friend was so fun to tease. I opened my mouth to tease her some more, when Lexsie sighed, her shoulders slumping, “I get it... I don't have a chance with him. I'm just another girl who likes Castiel...” She said dejectedly. I blinked at her, did she really think herself like that?

 I smacked her up side the head. Hard. Lexsie startled and turned to stare at me, her green eyes wide while I glared at her, “None of that self-pity, missy. A lot of girls like Castiel, sure, but do you know what he thinks of those girls?” I asked. Lexsie shook her head slowly. I smiled evilly, “He thinks they're all shallow insects that care more about the fact that their in a relationship than who they're in a relationship with.” Lexsie was starting to look down again, so I hurried and added, “And do you know what he thinks of you?” Immediately Lexsie perked up, her attention zeroing on me. I silently prayed that Castiel forgave me for telling Lexsie something that was supposed to be kept between the two of us, “He thinks you're, and I quote, 'an original who knows who and what she is.'” I poked Lexsie in the cheek, “Now, are you going to tell me that you don't have a chance with my brother again? Cuz I have plenty other proof that says you're the best pick.” I said teasingly.

 Lexsie giggled like a normal girl, “Does he really say that?” She asked, a blush riding up her cheeks. I rolled my eyes, wondering what monster I had created, “Yes, but if you dare mention I spilled, Castiel will murder me and then you'll be without your best friend. Plus Nathaniel will murder Castiel and then you'll be without your future hubby.” Lexsie's happy little blush when darker with anger, “KORIANNA WEST!!” She snapped and I burst out laughing, glad she was back to normal. Fortunately, before Lexsie could get a hold of my neck, someone behind us asked, “Uh... why would I kill Castiel?” Lexsie and I both turned to see Nathaniel standing behind us, his golden head tilted curiously. I brightened, “Hey I thought your family was still in the Caribbean!” When Nathaniel told me that his family was vacationing on some island in the Caribbean, something they did every year, I thought he meant he would be gone all summer.

 “Obviously not.” A voice I really didn't want to hear said behind Nathaniel. Lexsie groaned, “Great. Just when I thought I could get away from you.” My friend said, glaring at Amber who was standing there haughtily. I kicked Lexsie's foot, “Be nice.” I said through clenched teeth, I really didn't want to reprimand her, but Amber was Nathaniel's sister so I might as well try to be nice. Not that Amber was making the job easy for me, “Yeah, Lexington, be a good puppy and obey your girlfriend.” The blonde haired girl sneered. Nathaniel took a deep breath, his golden eyes looking heavenwards as if to ask for help. Meanwhile I was too busy trying to keep Lexsie from tearing Amber's throat out. Amber, apparently not realizing her death was emanate, laughed, “Geez, Korianna, I didn't know you had such a hard time keeping your girlfriends. Maybe you should let her go, she obviously doesn't want to be near you anymore. Can't really blame her.” I was awfully tempted to do what Amber was suggesting and let Lexsie murder the girl.

 Luckily for Amber, her brother finally turned to her, “Amber, stop it.” He said lowly. Amber frowned at Nathaniel, “I'm only playing around. I don't see why none of you can get jokes.” She said in a fake hurt voice. Nathaniel gave her a look, “You're jokes are hurtful. Stop it.” Amber's blue-green eyes filled up with crocodile tears, “Why are you being so m-mean to me?!” Amber wailed, bringing almost everyone's attention to us. My boyfriend looked like he was at the end of his rope. He turned to us, “Sorry, I'll be back.” He apologized before dragging his sister off. Lexsie and I glanced at each other, the black haired firecracker looked like she was about so say something when Castiel came back... with a new friend.

 “Kori, do you have a first aid kit?” Castiel asked as he practically shoved the girl down on his towel. Lexsie and I blinked at the newcomer than at each other. Castiel glowered down at us, Demon's leash clutched tightly in his fist, “Do you?” He growled. I rolled my eyes at my older twin and yanked my beach bag closer to me, digging through the massive thing to find the small first aid kit I had brought. Lexsie looked surprised, “Wait, you mean you actually brought that a kit?!” Even the new girl looked shocked. I snorted and jerked my thumb at the happy slobbering Demon, “With that monster out in public, of course. Trust me, this isn't the first time he's caused a riot.” Castiel looked offended for his dog, who just barked. The mysterious girl flinched away from Demon, her sea green eyes fearful of the animal. I smiled at her as I produced the little white box from the bottom of my beach bag, “Don't worry about him, Demon's all bark and no bite... with the occasional accidents.” The girl didn't answer me as she put her wrist out, showing the sand scrape from wear she hit the ground.

 Lexsie winced in sympathy, “I know how that feels. First time I ever held his leash, Demon yanked my feet out from under me and made me scrape my knee. But the Slobber Monster is just a big softie.” The black haired girl told the ginger. Castiel glared down at Lexsie, “He's a guard dog, he's not supposed to be a 'softie.'” My brother snapped. Lexsie rolled her eyes at him, “Well then you might want to talk to him, because Demon is the wimpiest dog I know.” I rolled my eyes at the two arguing, “Oi, lovebirds. Take the argument, and the Slobber Monster, elsewhere.” I snapped and earned two glares. I grinned, “Why don't you go get ice cream to cool off?” I asked innocently then tossed a few bills at Lexsie, who snatched at them hurriedly before they got blown away by the breeze, “Go on then. I'm busy.” I said, shooing the two away before they could argue with me. Shooting me sour glares the two hotheads left, Demon prancing between them, his stubby little tail waving madly.

 With them gone, I smiled at the shy girl, “Hi! Don't mind those two, they're just blockheads. My name is Korianna West. That guy is my twin, Castiel, in case you didn't know. And the black haired girl was Lexsie Liard. What's your name?” I chatted away. The ginger silently watched me as I applied disinfectant spray, not even flinching at the sting, and putting on a large cotton bandage. When I was finished she retracted her hand, cradling it against her chest, “Eva... Eva Biaglow.” She whispered so lowly I almost didn't hear her. I smiled, well at least she was talking. I settled down on my towel, turning so I faced the ocean. “Yeah. Hey are you new here? Or do you just go to another school. I go to Sweet Amoris.” Eva shook her head, “No... I just moved.” I glanced at the quiet girl. She was more shy than Savanna and Violette combined! “Oh, do you know where you'll be going to school yet?” Eva nodded, “Sweet Amoris.” She said quickly. I sighed, this conversation was feeling more like an interview. I hoped Castiel and Lexsie got back soon with that ice cream, and I hoped they were considerate enough to get me some!

 I heard rustling and glanced up to see Eva standing, “I have to go. Thank you.” She murmured and left without another word. I watched her go, her head down as she scurried across the beach as fast as she could without running. I raised an eyebrow before turning back to face the ocean, well that was odd.

 vvv

 It turned out that Lexsie and Castiel not only forgot about my ice cream, but they seemed to forget that I existed altogether. Both disappeared on me like they were never around in the first place. I scoffed and laid down on my towel, leave it to those two that the time they decided to go all doe eyed and finally admit to their feelings (at least I hoped) was when they had someone else with their party. Oh well, at least they weren't making out in front of me and making me feel like the very awkward third wheel. I reached into my beach bag of wonders and pulled out a novel. Just as I was turning to my dogeared place someone cleared their throat behind me. I laid my head back so I was looking at the person upside down. “Yes?” I asked politely.

 The guy smirked, his chest, and a very fine one I had to notice, puffed out, “Hey, I'm Dake and you're hot.” My polite expression fell flat as I stared at him, was he really that obtuse? Did he think a name and one stupid compliment would get him anywhere? I turned my gaze back to my book, resting my right arm under my head to serve as a pillow, “That's nice. Now go away.” I said flatly. Scratch just forgetting about me, I was going to murder Lexsie and Castiel for forgetting about me and not saving me from obvious flirts like this guy! The guy wasn't so easily deterred, “Aw, come on, babe. I know you're not that cruel. You stole my heart, being as lovely as you are.” Dake said as he came and sat down beside me. Flat Look numero dos was sent his way, “So, you're saying that beauty is the only thing that matters to you? Can you be more shallow?” I snapped. The guy didn't take it as an insult, “When it comes to you, I'll be anything!” The flirt declared. My eyes gleamed, “Oh really, can you be nothing but a bad memory?” I asked sarcastically. Dake chuckled, “Come on, sweets, I know you're playing hard to get. You want me, I can tell.” He said confidently. I wanted to hit him, “You're right... I want you gone.” I growled and turned my eyes back to my book, determined to ignore him. Mildly I hoped I didn't set the pages on fire with my glare.

 Suddenly the book was gone from my hands, I shot straight up, “Hey! Give that back you jerk!” I yelled and reached out to take the book Dake was dangling from his fingers. “First, a kiss.” He said and leaned in his cheek ready for a peck he obviously thought he was getting. I would love to disappoint him. As my fingers curled into a fist and my arm went back, ready to knock a few teeth out of this idiot, someone grabbed my elbow, “I do believe she asked you to leave her alone.” Nathaniel growled harshly. Dake blinked up at the golden haired guy then down at me, as I tried to scorch him with my glare. He was soooooo lucky Nathaniel came along when he did, otherwise Dake the Flirt would be a few teeth shy of a full smile. The guy scoffed and stood, “Fine fine, I can see I'm not wanted... see ya, baby.” Dake said airily, trying to brush off the fact that he had just been rejected. I rolled my eyes as he walked away, muttering, “Apparently you can't...”

 Nathaniel sat down beside me, giving me a strange look. I smiled brightly at him, “Thanks for saving me!” I said then leaned in to give him a little kiss on the cheek. Nathaniel raised an amused eyebrow, “Where's Lexsie?” He asked. I shrugged, “Eh, her and Castiel went to find ice cream a while ago. They better have a good 'we had a frank discussion of emotions and we're now dating' story if they want me to forgive them...” I grumbled. Nathaniel laughed and sat back, his hands propping himself up. I leaned against his sun warmed side, smiling, “What happened to Amber?” I asked curiously. Nathaniel shrugged, “She had an allergic reaction to some nuts and had to go home.” I blinked, “Oh.” I really didn't know what to say. Yeah I was glad she was out of the way so I could spend some time with my boyfriend, but- “Is she okay?” I asked. Nathaniel nodded, his eyes closing as he turned his face to the sun, “Yeah. She's not that allergic. Not the way I am to pollen, or my mom to cats.” I giggled, “What's your dad allergic to?” I asked teasingly.

 Nathaniel cracked one eye to glare at me, “Ha ha, very funny.” My boyfriend said sarcastically before grabbing me by the waist and letting us both flop back, my torso securely pressed against his chest. I blushed madly, “Nathaniel...” I said and tried to ease up from his chiseled chest. Mildly I wondered why on earth a student body president would have such a nice body. The boy beneath me gave an amused snort and tightened his arms around my waist before tilting his head up to nuzzle my neck. My breath hitched when I felt his smiling lips press into the soft skin under my jawbone. I tried to push away again, but Nathaniel stopped me by latching on to my earlobe with his teeth. A tiny gasp escaped my mouth when he tugged, my heart fluttering like some flighty bird in a cage. Before I had time to respond, Nathaniel flipped us over so I was on bottom and he was laying halfway on top of me. Slowly Nathaniel traveled up and down my neck, taking his sweet time to explore ever inch of skin with his mouth. He buried his nose in the defined hollow of my throat, kissing the skin just below it periodically.

 With a barely suppressed groan Nathaniel finally leaned up to capture my mouth with his. His tongue probed against my bottom lip, asking for entrance. My lips seemed to part on their own accord and Nathaniel's tongue dipped in, giving me a whole new sense of the word 'kiss'. My mind drew a blank on everything; where we were, what day it was, the fact that Castiel could walk up on us at any time, even my own name slipped away briefly. I seemed to forget that Ty used to kiss me like that all the time, that every time the jerk kissed me he would forcibly shove his tongue down my throat. Nathaniel's kiss was more, so much more, in ways I couldn't begin to explain. I moaned into his mouth, my hands running over his bare chest to his golden hair, my fingers tangling in those locks. Nathaniel seemed to enjoy my reaction and stroked the roof of my mouth with his tongue as a reward. I groaned again. Nathaniel retracted his wet muscle from my mouth and sank his teeth gently into my lower lip, drawing back slowly so that his teeth scraped against the tender flesh. “Nathaniel...” I groaned, my breaths coming in at shallow pants.

 Hearing his name must have shook some sense into him, for Nathaniel leaned back, looking about as breathless as I was feeling. “Korianna, I'm... going swimming.” My boyfriend managed to get out before scrabbling off of me. Though still a little giddy from that make out session, I couldn't help but grin, “Why, Nathaniel? Need a nice long cold bath?” I teased. Nathaniel shot me a nasty glare before grabbing my wrists, pulling me to a stand, “No... come on your coming with me.” He said determinedly. I laughed and shot forward out of his grip, “Last one in pays for dinner!” I yelled. I could hear Nathaniel's shout of cheating behind me, but ignored it, laughing the whole way.

 Of course, Nathaniel beat me. He had managed to snag my waist just feet from the water and spun around so that he was the one closer to the waves than I before letting me go. I was still trying to find my footing when Nathaniel dove head first into the brine, earning first place and getting a cold soak all in one. I laughed at him when I finally gained balance and pounced on his back, causing both of us to go underwater. When Nathaniel finally surfaced, one eye closed as the other narrowed dangerously at me, I just continued to laugh, my white hair plastered to my body. “Korianna... you're going to regret that.” He growled playfully and started towards me. I 'eep'ed and dove under the water in an attempt to get away from my boyfriend. He just grabbed me by the ankle and dragged me back, catching me up against his chest. I squealed and struggled, but not too much. It seemed that Nathaniel's form of punishment was a quick nip at the neck, that wasn't something too bad. I giggled and tried to get away playfully, until I noticed that my bikini top was strangely loose. Tilting my head in confusion I began to reach backwards to see if the knot was loose or something when I felt something along my side that definitely wasn't my hair.

 It was my bikini strap.

 I went red and pressed myself further against Nathaniel's chest as my arms crept up to keep my top in place. Of all the things that could happen to me, having my top come off in front of my boyfriend, in a public place no less, was one that I didn't want to happen. Somehow I would have to think of a way to get it tied again without Nathaniel knowing. If only Lexsie were here, she could do it for me and none would be the wiser. “Hey what's this?” Nathaniel suddenly asked and I felt a small tug on my top. I mentally groaned, now karma was just trolling me. “Uh... Korianna, I think your...” Nathaniel trailed off when I nodded, “I know. C-can you... tie it back?” I asked awkwardly. Without a word Nathaniel took a step back, the water sloshing around us, lapping coldly at my hips, as Nathaniel took the two untied straps between his fingers. There was a few sharp tugs and I felt the relief when my bikini top once again laid snug against my skin.

 All in all, I'd say it wasn't that bad a day at the beach.

 *MonKeybiz has signed in*

 CrAzYArtist: Heeeeeeey~! How's your summer coming?

 MonKeybiz: Fine... except for the fact that all my friends are a state away, and so is my crush.

 CrAzYArtist: Awwwwww, poor Savannah! You need a hug!

 RabidsingeR: lol, Kori have you been eating sugar again?

 CrAzYArtist: I'M STILL NOT TALKING TO YOU!!

 RabidsingeR: …

 RockStar: By stating that you're not talking to her is talking to her, Kori.

 CrAzYArtist: Did I ask you?

 MonKeybiz: Okay, what did I miss?

 SBPrez: Well... West and Lexsie abandoned Korianna at the beach last week.

 RockStar: Butt out, Powers! It's none of your business!

 SBPrez: You left your sister, whom I am dating, alone. I say it is my business.

 RockStar: Kori is perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

 SBPrez: I don't doubt that, but it's still rude and careless to leave her to fend for herself.

 RabidsingeR: See what you did, Savannah?

 MonKeybiz: I think it's kinda sweet! ^^ Nath is standing up for his girlfriend!

 CrAzYArtist: While Castiel is covering his butt.

 RockStar: HEY!

 RabidsingeR: Kori stop being mean.

 CrAzYArtist: Okay... as soon as you admit what the heck you two were doing when you were abandoning me!

 SBPrez: Oh this should be good...

 MonKeybiz: I am super duper curious now.

 RockStar: We didn't do anything!

 RabidsingeR: Yeah! We went to get ice cream, that was it!

 CrAzYArtist: Nice excuse. Except I could see the ice cream stand from the ocean. You weren't there.

 RockStar: What were you doing in the ocean? You said you didn't want to go swimming.

 CrAzYArtist: Nathaniel wanted to go swimming. And stop trying to change the subject. I'm not letting this go.

 RockStar: NATHANIEL POWERS!

 RabidsingeR: Kori!

 SBPrez: We are dating. It's perfectly acceptable to swim together. -.-

 VictorianPoet: Among other things.

 CrAzYArtist: SHUT UP LYS!!!

 MonKeybiz: Wait! When did he get here?!?!?!

 VictorianPoet: I joined shortly before you logged on. You had just missed the conversation.

 MonKeybiz: Oh... well then, HI LYS! Welcome to ChatRoomz!

 VictorianPoet: Thank you, Savannah.

 RockStar: WAAAAAAIT a damn minute. What do you mean 'among other things' Lysander?

 CrAzYArtist: Say one word, Lysander, and I'll ban you from my chat room.

 RabidsingeR: You can do that?!

 CrAzYArtist: As the administrator and creator of this chat room: yes.

 VictorianPoet: I do believe that is blackmail.

 RockStar: I don't care if you ban him, I want to know what you and Goody-goody were up to!

 SBPrez: Nothing more than what you and Lexsie were up to.

 RockStar: KORIANNA RILLIE WEST! You. Are. Grounded!

 CrAzYArtist: What?! You can't ground me!! And what were you and Lexsie doing anyway, if I was grounded?

 RabidsingeR: Nothing!

 MonKeybiz: lol a little too fast there, Lexsie... you just made it obvious.

 RabidsingeR: Where are Penni and Jade?

 CrAzYArtist: You're subtly is very lacking. (They're both on vacation)

 SBPrez: Just admit you two were making out already!

 RockStar: NATHANIEL!

 MonKeybiz: lolololololol I think that's the first time Castiel has every called Nath by his first name. XDDDD

 RabidsingeR: We weren't doing anything!

 CrAzYArtist: Then where were ya'll and why won't you tell the rest of us since you're SO innocent?

 RockStar: ...You're sarcasm is not appreciated...

 VictorianPoet: They were making out... more so than Nathaniel and Korianna.

 CrAzYArtist: LYSANDER!

 RockStar: Traitor.

 RabidsingeR: Imma going to KILL you!

 MonKeybiz: I'm going to die of laughter!!!!!!

 SBPrez: ...I think you are enjoying this, Lysander.

 VictorianPoet: Very much so.

 RockStar: Kori will you ban him now?

 CrAzYArtist: I'll ask him one question before I do...

 VictorianPoet: Hm?

 CrAzYArtist: ARE YOU A BEACH SPY OR SOMETHING?!?!?!

 VictorianPoet: Yes.

 CrAzYArtist: …

 VictorianPoet: And I commend you on how well you handled that Dake character.

 SBPrez: lol how long were you watching us, Lys?

 CrAzYArtist: Regardless of what he answers, he's dead anyway...

 RockStar: Who's Dake? And what was he doing?

 SBPrez: Flirting nonstop with your sister shortly after you and Lexsie abandoned her.

 RockStar: ARGH! I'm going to kill him than you, Powers, for messing with my little sister!

 CrAzYArtist: I'm TWO minutes younger than you! And you're not going to kill my boyfriend unless I get to kill you for messing around with Lexsie!

 RockStar: I didn't do anything!

 CrAzYArtist: Yeah yeah... keep talking. Denial is strong with you, but I'll break it eventually.

 VictorianPoet: ha ha

 MonKeybiz: *sigh* Why am I not there to enjoy all this drama?

 RabidsingeR: If you were I'm sure we'd be having this discussion about you and Lys.

 VictorianPoet: Hm?

 MonKeybiz: BAN HER KORI!! BAN BAN BAN!!!!!!

 SBPrez: I'm hungry. When are you taking me to dinner, Korianna?

 CrAzYArtist: Shut up you cheater.

 SBPrez: You cheated first~! ^^

 RockStar: No one is taking anyone to dinner!

 VictorianPoet: I thought you were taking Lexsie to dinner tonight...

 CrAzYArtist: YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO PRACTICE WITH LYSANDER!!!!!

 RockStar: Damn you, Lys...

 MonKeybiz: lol, Lysander I never pegged you as a troll.

 VictorianPoet: Is that internet lingo? I'm afraid I don't understand.

 MonKeybiz: I'll teach you if you want!

 CrAzYArtist: Great, now that everyone has a date tonight, bye! I gotta go get my wallet...

 MonKeybiz: KORIANNA!

 RabidsingeR: I'm going to murder you the next time I see you!

 SBPrez: Better make sure you have a lot of cash. I have expensive tastes, honey.

 CrAzYArtist: ...I hate you...

 “I thought you said you had expensive tastes.” I said as Nathaniel lead me into a restaurant that wasn't too fancy; it wouldn't suck my whole savings dry. Nathaniel smiled at me as he held the door open, “I do, but I decided to be nice. Besides, most fancy restaurants make you reserve ahead of time.” He said cheerfully. I glared at him, “Nice to know you're so worried about my wallet, Powers.” I growled sarcastically, my boyfriend's smile only grew wider. My eye twitched as a funny thought came to me, “You know... you're last name makes you sound like some type of lame superhero.” I pointed out. Nathaniel's grin turned into a smirk, “Oh? So can you imagine me in a cape and tights?” He asked seductively. I blushed brightly and pressed my fingers into my temples, closing my eyes tightly, “Ahhh! The mental image! It burns!” I squealed. Nathaniel just laughed, not at all offended like most guys would be.

 After the tired looking hostess showed us out seats and took our drink orders, Nathaniel turned to me. “So, what's my price limit?” He asked teasingly. I glared at him, “Nothing over forty bucks, got it?” He gave a mock salute, “Yes, ma'am!” He said before turning to the menu. I studied him, intrigued by his sudden display of cheerfulness. At school, Nathaniel was always so serious and focused, he rarely ever got distracted from school stuff. The guy sitting across from me wasn't like the Nathaniel at school at all. He was cheerful and more relaxed than I had ever seen him; he actually made jokes that were funny. I mean this was the guy who kissed me in public at the beach, at school Nathaniel was too busy with student council stuff and academics to barely even walk me to my next class. I liked the Nathaniel at school, but I was starting to like this Nathaniel a little more.

 My boyfriend seemed aware of my gaze, his golden eyes looked up from the menu to meet my own, “Yes?” He questioned, his mouth turning up in an easy smile. I returned it, “Nothing... just noticing stuff about you.” I said in an almost dreamy tone. Nathaniel's eyebrows started reaching for his hairline, “Oh? What kind of stuff?” He asked as he set the menu down, giving me his full attention. “You don't act the same in school as you do out. You're not so... serious.” I said. It surprised me that Nathaniel frowned and shifted in his seat, looking extremely uncomfortable. “Yeah well... my dad is very strict when it comes to school.” He said, sounding like the School Nathaniel I knew. I tilted my head, confused at his sudden change in personality, “Most dad's are, mine is too.” I tried to tell him, but Nathaniel just shook his head. I shrugged and looked down at the menu, determined not to ruin the night over something Nathaniel clearly didn't want to talk about.

 vvv

 “That was nice. We should do this more often.” I said as we walked out of the restaurant. Nathaniel smiled and snatched up my hand, entwining our fingers together, “Sure, and I promise I'll pay next time. Do you like sea food?” He asked. I stuck out my tongue, “No thanks. I don't like fish at all.” From the look on Nathaniel's face, I might as well said that I enjoyed kicking kittens or something. I laughed at his expression, “You should see your face.” I giggled. Nathaniel looked away with a pout, “How can someone not like fish?” He asked. I stuck my tongue out at him, “The same way you don't like sweets. I just don't.”

 Nathaniel glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and let go of my hand to wrap his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to press a kiss into my temple, “You're cute,” was all he said. Suddenly I felt extremely shy, as I remembered making out with Nathaniel on the beach for some odd reason. Lately he had been acting more like a boyfriend and less like a... friend, even though we had technically started dating back during Halloween. Nathaniel chuckled at my blush, “You're even more cute now.” He commented and tightened his hold around my waist. I was starting to feel as shy as Savannah when she was around Lysander. “A-are you ready for school to start?” I asked, stuttering only a little.

 The golden haired boy laughed, “Not really.” He admitted. I stared at him, honestly I had thought he would be happy that school would be starting. Nathaniel seemed to be that kind of person, the one who looked forward to school for whatever reason. I on the other hand could stay in my room drawing or hanging out with my friends for the rest of eternity and never go to school again. If I could get away with it, I might actually have considered dropping out; but since no one ever succeeded as a high school dropout, I continued to go to school. Nathaniel smiled at my shocked expression, “What? I'm a normal teenager, Korianna, I hate school as much as anyone.” He said amused. It was my turn to turn away with a pout, “You could have fooled me...” I said. I only got an eye roll from my boyfriend.

 “Kori...?” A boy called. I frowned as I turned around, that voice sounded oddly familiar. My jaw dropped when I saw who was walking towards Nathaniel and I, “T-Ty?!” I sputtered when I saw my ex-boyfriend walking towards us with a quick stride. He had changed drastically from the last time I saw him, before I moved to Sweet Amoris. Back when we were still dating, Ty managed to keep that 'All-American boy' look and hiding his less than stellar activities. Now his plain blonde hair, which used to be so wavy, hung limply over his washed out blue eyes. Bags sagged under his eyes, dark against his pasty skin. Looking at Ty, I could hardly believe that the boy who looked like the typical football jock had turned into such a sleaze.

 Completely ignoring Nathaniel, Ty wrapped his still muscled arms around me and squeezed tightly. I gagged at the rancid smell of his shirt pressing into my face. Was this the only shirt he owned?! “Kori! I can't believe it's you! When I heard that you moved into this area I was ecstatic! Babe, you don't know how much I missed you, I even moved here to find you!” Ty pulled back and gave me a grin that I once melted for before ducking his head to kiss me.

 Instead of my lips, his mouth met Nathaniel's fist. Ty stumbled back, letting go of me in the process, and cradled his jaw, “What the f*ck was that for?!” Ty garbled as he glared at Nathaniel. My golden haired knight in shining armor stood in front of me with his arms crossed. What was with boys trying to flirt with me out of the blue all of a sudden? It was like they were all waiting for me to enter a relationship before they decided to crash things! Ty glared at Nathaniel, “Dude, who the hell are you?” Ty snapped, blood dribbling down his chin a little. Nathaniel didn't look amused in the slightest, “Korianna's boyfriend.” He said flatly.

 Despite the situation before me, I couldn't help but do a happy dance on the inside. Nathaniel admitted it so easily, as if it were only natural that he was my boyfriend. When I had been dating Ty, he always laughed it off and changed the subject. If he actually did admit that he was dating me, Ty would always seem reluctant to admit the fact. I glanced between Nathaniel and Ty. I hadn't realized how bad a boyfriend Ty had been compared to Nathaniel. They were practically on the opposite spectrum of boyfriends. Ty laughed harshly, “So that little bitc-” Nathaniel slammed his fist into Ty's face again. I was honestly surprised that he was so violent. I never expected Nathaniel to be violent prone. Sure, he and Castiel almost got into a fight when I first moved to Sweet Amoris, but I had thought it was a one time thing. Guess I was wrong.

 “Refrain from calling Korianna that.” Nathaniel actually growled. I had seen enough. I tugged on Nathaniel's sleeve, “Come on, he's not worth it.” I said softly. Nathaniel glanced at me out of the corner of his eye before nodding and turning his back on the still moaning Ty. I smiled as I looped my arm through his. Other than the incident with Ty, which I hoped never happened again, tonight was a good night. I got to see a part of Nathaniel that no one ever did and I knew that he wasn't ashamed of me like Ty had been. I had gotten a better deal with Nathaniel than I'd ever get with Ty.

 RockStar: WHAT?!?!?!?!

SBPrez: You heard me. I want to know all about Ty.

 RabidsingeR: Why? And how do you know about Ty? We've never mentioned him by name... that I know of.

 SBPrez: ...he tried to kiss Kori...

 RockStar: WHAT?!?!?!

 SBPrez: Is that the only word you know?

 RockStar: Shut up, Powers. What happened with Kori and Ty?

 SBPrez: We left the restaurant, some guy called out to her. She called him 'Ty'. He started babbling about how much he missed her and tired to kiss her. I smashed my fist into his face. When he called her a bitch, I punch him again.

 RabidsingeR: Nath... I love you. Don't ever change.

 RockStar: HEY!

 RabidsingeR: I love him like a brother!

 VictorianPoet: You know... he might be your brother-in-law one day.

 SBPrez: You're matchmaking is not appreciated, Lysander.

 RockStar: *gag* LYSANDER! Stop trolling.

 VictorianPoet: No.

 MonKeybiz: Stop it! Oh dear heaven and earth! For all that is holy, STOP! I'm dying of laughter!!! XDDDDDD

 MonKeybiz: Where is Kori anyway? She hasn't logged in at all.

 RockStar: It's Saturday before school starts.

 MonKeybiz: Ohhhhhhhhh...

 VictorianPoet: What does that have to do with anything?

RabidsingeR: I shall explain for you newbies to the mysterious ways of Korianna West. Come in closer, little children, as I spin a tell of woe and misery.

 SBPrez: Cut the dramatics and speak plainly.

 VictorianPoet: You fail at theatrical speech anyway.

 RabidsingeR: ...jerks... Anyway, we all know Kori hates school. So she has a tradition of sleeping in extra late on her last true day of summer. The record is sleeping for eleven hours straight. She didn't get up until 5 pm.

 RockStar: Yeah, and that was when Dad flipped her mattress over and dumped her out of bed. If he hadn't interrupted she'd probably have slept all day, literally.

 SBPrez: Why are you always more talkative when your girlfriend is speaking?

RockStar: Why do you even care?

 SBPrez: I don't.

 RockStar: THEN WHY DID YOU ASK!?!

 SBPrez: To see you get defensive. It's amusing.

 RockStar: …

 SBPrez: Also, it's nice to know that you admit to dating Lexsie. I'm sure Korianna will be happy.

 RockStar: NATHANIEL POWERS!!!!

 MonKeybiz: lol Lys, I think you're rubbing off on Nath.

 SBPrez: Don't call me Nath.

 MonKeybiz: Tell me why you don’t want to be called that name and I'll stop calling you that.

 GreenThumb: Since Kori isn't here to keep you on track... we WERE talking about Kori and Ty.

 RabidsingeR: ...oops. It's amusing to see Castiel and Nath dish it out, why don't they do that normally?

 VictorianPoet: Because they're both whipped by Korianna.

 MonKeybiz: lol that's true! XD

 RockStar: ...I'm not even going to respond to that.

 SBPrez: I still want to know about Ty.

 RockStar: You'll have to ask Kori. It's her story, not ours.

 SBPrez: You couldn't tell me that to begin with?

 RockStar: No.

 SBPrez: ...you're a dick.

 RabidsingeR: ...O.O Did...He...?

 MonKeybiz: HE DID!!! NATHANIEL JUST CUSSED!!!!!!!!!!!! THE WORLD IS ENDING! THE WORLD IS ENDING!! Lshdklgjakdlgjlaksjdfl!!!!!

 SBPrez: -_- ...You two are weird.

 VictorianPoet: You can't really blame them. I've known you almost as long as Castiel and this is the first time I've ever heard you cuss.

 GreenThumb: It is strange hearing that coming from you, Nathaniel.

 SBPrez: *sigh*

 RockStar: Ha ha! Everyone thinks your a Goody-goody!

 SBPrez: Shall I go into how you were as a child?

 RockStar: Lexsie already knows, and of course Kori does too. So your plan is flawed.

 SBPrez: Then how about why you became a jerk?

 RockStar: Stop right there, Powers.

 SBPrez: ^^ I wasn't going to say anything.

 RabidsingeR: Okay, this is too muck OOC in here. NATH GO BACK TO BEING A SERIOUS STICK IN THE MUD! CASTIEL START HATING NATH AGAIN, STOP WITH THE POKING FUN AT EACH OTHER!!!!

 GreenThumb: I agree with Lexsie, it is a little weird.

 SBPrez: I'll be a stick in the mud when school starts.

 RockStar: I DO HATE HIM!

 SBPrez: The feeling is mutual, West.

 RockStar: Shut the hell up, Powers.

 GreenThumb: *sigh* Here we go again...

 MonKeybiz: Ring around the rosy, Pocket full of posy! Ashes ashes we all fall down!

 SBPrez: You do realize that song is about the Black Death right?

 MonKeybiz: Really?! Cool!!

 RabidsingeR: *cough cough* NATH IS A NERD!

 VictorianPoet: Knowing trivia doesn't make someone a nerd.

 RockStar: Says the guy full of useless trivia.

 MonKeybiz: Hey! I love trivia! Don't spoil my fun, Castiel!!!

 RockStar: Don't worry I won't!

 MonKeybiz: ...I hate you... Nath and I are going to start at Castiel Hate Club.

 RabidsingeR: Hey! Don't hate on my boyfriend!

 MonKeybiz: You were the president of his fan club back home, it's only right that I be the president of his hate club here!

 RockStar: ...What?

 VictorianPoet: ...

 GreenThumb: XDDDDDDD

 SBPrez: lol

 RabidsingeR: SAVANNAH KNIGHT, I'M GOING TO MURDER YOU!!!!

 MonKeybiz: *sigh* just like old times.

 “Kori, I need your help, get down here!”

 I paused in shading the last bit of my art project and called out. “Why? You said you didn't need any help.”

 “Get the damn dog outta here! He keeps getting in the way!” Castiel snapped back.

 Sighing I set aside my drawing pad and wondered into the kitchen where my brother was, “You know… I don't think Lexsie will really care if you-”

 My brother cut me off, “Take Demon for a walk!”

 I rolled my eyes as I whistled for Demon to follow me. The slobber monster practically knocked my feet from underneath me in his hurry to get to the door. Instead of reaching for the leash, because not even Castiel could hold back that dog sometimes, I grabbed the dog whistle and a baggie of treats.

 First holiday this school year, and I was spending it walking my brother's uncontrollable dog. I hadn't had any downtime since the summer ended, what with my AP classes that Nathaniel convinced me to sign up for and more extracurricular activities like the art club and Theater. And even though it was Thanksgiving holiday, I still had to write a five page essay over Hawthorn’s 'Scarlet Letter', finish my still life for the art club before Christmas break, and finish painting the props for Theater’s spring play.

 Tansy had convinced me to get into Theater, saying that I would be just the girl for it. She didn't tell me that they only needed my artistic skills for painting the backdrops and props. Oh well, at least I was needed somewhere. Lately it seemed like I was just getting under everyone's foot. Some people I could understand, like Nathaniel who took nothing but AP classes as well as being the student body president, were very busy; but ever since Lexsie and Castiel started officially going out she never so much as said 'hi' to me, even though she was in our apartment almost everyday.

 I didn't blame her of course, Castiel had only asked her out three weeks ago so I knew that Lexsie was still getting used to her 'in a relationship' status. Nathaniel had been the only thing in my radar when I first started dating him and even before that. But it still hurt that she only had eyes for my own brother and I was forced to be around her constantly anyway.

 Demon suddenly took off, probably after some stray cat. I wasn't too worried about him, Demon was a city dog; Castiel had told me that the first and last time Demon had ran into the streets he got hit by a car and broke his right foreleg. Since then the giant slobber monster avoided walking even near the curb. It was one thing neither my brother or I had to worry about.

 Jumping up on people and knocking them over was still a problem, unfortunately.

 Demon disappeared around the corner of the bank and not five seconds later a girlish shriek resounded. I groaned and quickened my pace, I just hoped that whoever Demon 'attacked' wasn't some uppity snot who was going to file charges or threaten to call animal control.

 I didn't know who the girl was, but I did recognize the boy who was helping her up.

 Jade grinned when he saw me, “Kori!”

 I blinked at my green haired friend before smiling back, “Hi, Jade. Uh, sorry about Demon. He's kind of… uncontrollable.” As if to prove my point, the slobber monster took off again, this time barking after a skateboarder who had just shot past us. I helped Jade pull the girl to her feet, “I really am sorry, are you alright?”

 The girl stood up, dusting off her floral print skirt and held out her hand, “Oh I'm fine! My name is Ruby, and you're Kori, right?”

 Ruby, huh? I glanced at her bright red hair, her parents name her right at least. I shook her proffered hand, “Korianna, but my friends call me Kori.” I glanced between Jade and Ruby, “Are you… related by any chance?”

 Ruby laughed, “It's the names, isn't it? That's how everyone else always guesses. Our mother wanted to name her children after jewels. Something about how precious the 'family jewels' were.” I smiled again, if there was one thing to be said about this strange girl, it was that she was a lot more outgoing than her brother.

 I glanced at Jade to see him rolling his eyes fondly. They seemed to get along at least. He turned to me, “So how have you been? You haven't gotten onto ChatRoomz in forever and everyone always says you're busy.”

 I smiled sheepishly “Sorry. I signed up for more extracurricular activities this year and they're really taking it out of me.”

“Yeah I know, when I went to Sweet Amoris to help out with the garden again this year you didn't even drop by.”

 “You were there? You didn't tell me that!” What else have people been neglecting to tell me? Lexsie didn't even tell me when she started going out with Castiel, it was my brother who told me about an hour before their first date! And Penni never told me she started taking dance lessons until she asked Castiel for a ride to the dance studio one day.

 Jade shrugged helplessly and rubbed the back of his neck, “I'm not allowed in the school since I'm not a student. Why do you think I always made you run errands for me?”

 I hung my head in defeat. Some vacation this was turning out to be. All my friends were turning up and doing things without telling me, which made me feel incredibly left out. Hopefully it wouldn't be so bad when I went to have dinner at Nathaniel’s house tonight.

 Ruby giggled and patted my shoulder, “Don't worry about it, Korianna! Jade here is just a fuddy duddy,” The red haired girl leaned in as if she was going to tell me a secret, “I think it's because he won't tell anyone who he has a crush on! It's effecting his life, ya know?” She said loud enough that Jade heard her.

 He turned bright red and sputtered while Ruby and I laughed. Smirking I tilted my head to the side and raised a hand to shield my mouth from Jade as I said back, “Oh? Do tell~” I hadn't talked to Violette in a while, but from what Savannah told me she still had a crush on Jade. Could he have a crush on her? It would make my matchmaking job much easier.

 Ruby gave me a one armed hug that was more like a strangle hold, “Oooo I like you! Jadey-boy why didn't you tell me your friends were so fun?”

 “Jadey-boy?” I snorted as Jade's blush turned darker. If I ever got back on ChatRoomz I was going to announce his silly nickname to everyone.

[dceshims-blog]

↳ damn, is that MOON DAESHIM ? the IM CHANGKYUN lookalike gotten quite the reputation around here. the 23 year old RAPPER / PRODUCER has been in london for ONE year now. people say they are only HEDONISTIC + SELF DESTRUCTIVE, but they’re actually CHARMING + ADVENTUROUS once you get to know them. don’t get too comfortable, though, no one knows HIS AGENCY / COMPANY PAID TO HAVE SOMETHING HE DID HIDDEN FROM THE WORLD.

 HIYA  HEY  HELLO,  i'm  gem,  i'm  21+,  i  go  by  she  her  pronouns  &  live  in  the  cst  !  i'm  also  a  hot  mess  who  likes  hurting  my  characters  ...  hence  the  reason  that  dae's  life  is  as  big  of  a  mess  as  it  is.  he's  a  new  character,  which  means  not  everything  is  fleshed  out  like  i  would  like  it  to  be  but  you  can  find  his  basic  information,  stats,  bullet  point  bio,  personality  &  a  few  wanted  connections  ideas  under  the  cut  !  

tw:  mentions  of  alcohol  abuse,  drug  abuse,  car  accidents,  hit  and  run  scenario,  death  &  injuries  !

                                         basic  information.

full  name:  moon  daeshim. nickname(s):  moon,  dae,  shimmy,  daedae.  (  the  last  one  is  use  by  his  mother  &  mother  ONLY  ) age:  twenty-three. date  of  birth:  tbd. birthplace:  daegu,  south  korea. gender:  cismale. pronouns:  he  /  him  /  his. orientation:  pansexual. occupation:  rapper,  producer,  composer. language(s)  spoken:  korean,  english,  japanese,  chinese,  thai,  french  &  spanish.

                                    physical  appearance.

faceclaim:  im  changkyun  (  i.m  )  of  monsta  x. hair  color:  changes  pretty  frequently,  currently  black. eye  color:  brown. height:  6  ’  0  ". weight:  175. build:  athletic. tattoos:  quite  a  few,  far  to  many  to  name  ...  mostly  black  &  grey. piercings:  7  in  his  left  ear,  8  in  his  right,  tongue  piercing,  eyebrow  piercing  on  his  left  brow  &  scars  from  old  snake  bites  under  his  bottom  lip.

                                                    health.

physical  ailments:  alcohol  abuse,  drug  abuse. neurological  conditions:  n/a. allergies:  seasonal  ailments. sleeping  habits:  3-4  hours,  restless,  tosses  &  turns. eating  habits:  lives  of  of  fast  food  &  take  out  usually,  sometimes  goes  to  'fancier'  places. exercise  habits:  has  personal  trainers  who  he  works  out  with  three  times  a  week. body  temperature:  hot  natured. addictions:  alcohol,  tobacco,  drugs,  sex. drug  use:  frequent. alcohol  use:  frequent.

                                       personality. (  pt  1.  )

label:  tbd.

positive  traits:  charming  &  adventurous. negative  traits:  hedonistic  &  self-destructive. fears:  tbd. hobbies:  cooking,  video  games,  shopping,  board  games,  swimming,  poker,  going  to  the  movies,  traveling,  exercising,  eating  out. habits:  jiggles  leg  up  &  down,  taps  feet  on  occasion,  runs  fingers  through  hair  often,  constantly  glances  at  his  watch,  rolls  his  eyes,  cracks  knuckles  /  bones,  shifts  in  his  seat  when  nervous  /  irritated,  clenches  jaw,  gestures  when  speaking,  props  feet  up  on  desks  /  tables,  constantly  checks  his  phone. quirks:  wears  a  lot  of  jewelry,  good  with  technology,  paces  back  &  forth  when  in  deep  thought  or  when  nervous,  mumbles  to  himself  on  occasion,  constantly  on  social  media,  bites  &  chews  on  lips,  night  owl,  addicted  to  texting,  can  play  musical  instruments,  dyes  his  hair  a  different  color  constantly,  addicted  to  caffeinated  drinks,  always  has  to  have  the  'best’  of  everything  he  owns,  has  to  have  a  fan  on  to  sleep,  chews  ice  cubes.

                                              favorites.

season:  fall,  winter. color(s):  matte  black,  chrome,  army  green,  gold  &  silver. music:  will  listen  to  anything  as  long  as  he  likes  it,  doesn’t  matter  what genre. movies:  watches  pretty  much  everything,  mostly  enjoys  suspense,  action  &  comedy. sport(s):  doesn’t  really  care  for  sports,  watches  it  if  it's  on  at  bars. beverage(s):  anything  and  everything,  other  than  sparkling  water. food:  anything  from  luxurious  5  star  meals  to  instant  ramen  cooked  at  home. animal:  dogs.

                                                  family.

father: tbd. mother: tbd. sibling(s):  n/a. children:  n/a. pet(s):  tbd. family’s  financial  status:  upper  class.

                                                  extras.

zodiac sign:  tbd. mbti:  entp-a.  (  the  debater.  ) enneagram:  type  eight. (  the  challenger.  ) temperament:  sanguine. hogwarts  house:  slytherin. moral  alignment:  tbd. primary  vice:  tbd. primary  virtue:  tbd. element:  fire.

                                             biography.

born  in  daegu,  south  korea  to  two  extremely  wealthy  parents.

his  father  was  a  very  well  known  idol,  his  mother  a  fashion  designer.

meaning  that  dae  was  in  the  spotlight  since  BIRTH,  he's  never  known  anything  other  than  fame  &  fortune.

that  of  course,  went  to  his  head  from  a  very,  very  young  age  &  it  caused  this  sort  of  god  complex  in  him.

his  nannies  HATED  having  to  work  for  his  parents  &  take  care  of  him  because  he  made  their  lives  a  living  hell  basically.  not  because  he  was  MEAN  or  something  like  that  but  because  he  was  just  picky  &  was  used  to  getting  what  he  wanted.

which  did  cause  him  to  be  bratty  &  he  did  have  the  tendency  to  throw  fits  when  he  didn't  get  what  he  wanted,  always  going  to  his  parents  whenever  the  nannies  wouldn't  give  dae  what  he  wanted  &  they'd  end  up  either  quitting  or  getting  fired.

things  didn't  really  change  through  the  years,  to  be  honest.  he  got  less  'whiny'  about  things,  but  was  still  use  to  just  asking  for  whatever  he  wanted  &  getting  it  as  soon  as  humanly  possible.

he  was  fourteen  when  he  first  started  showing  interest  in  music,  though  he  didn't  follow  in  his  father's  footsteps  by  becoming  a  trainee.  he  was  more  into  producing  &  composing  than  anything.

it  wasn't  until  a  few  years  later  that  he  started  rapping  to  the  music  he  was  composing  in  order  to  try  &  get  them  bought  by  companies.

people  thought  that  he  was  actually  wanting  to  be  a  rapper  instead  of  just  a  producer  /  composer,  so  when  the  companies  kept  asking  him  if  he  was  interested  in  being  a  rapper,  he  figured  why  not.

that  was  the  start  of  his  career,  his  first  mini-album  skyrocketed  his  name  further  into  fame,  quickly  becoming  the  most  talked  about  rookie  in  the  business.

things  only  got  better  from  there,  each  album  he  dropped  debuted  at  the  top  of  charts,  keeping  his  name  in  the  spotlight  CONSTANTLY.

after  years  of  that,  things  started  getting  to  him  ...  the  stress  of  always  having  to  drop  something  new  and  fresh  caused  daeshim  to  start  to  spiral,  drinking  &  doing  drugs  almost  every  night  as  a  way  to  get  away  from  all  of  it  even  if  it  was  just  for  a  few  hours.

this  started  the  rumor  mill  to  begin,  articles  of  his  partying  ways,  the  clubbing  &  everything  like  that  starting  to  pile  up  one  after  the  next.  as  well  as  the  rumors  and  scandals  of  his  nudes  being  leaked  &  him  taking  home  as  many  people  he  wanted  to  because  he  truly  just  didn't  care  about  his  image  or  anything  like  that.

it  was  his  twentith  birthday  that  would  change  EVERYTHING  for  dae.  he'd  decided  to  go  out,  celebrate  by  drinking  &  going  wild  for  the  night  ...  stupidly  driving  home  from  the  club  that  night.

mid-way  home  he  happened  to  get  into  a  crash,  car  getting  totaled  as  well  as  a clipping  a  few  passer-bys ...  causing  one  to  pass  away  &  the  other  to  get  severely  injured  as  well  as  dae  getting  a  laundry  list  of  injuries  as  well.

he  was  okay  enough  to  walk  away  from  the  incident,  though  not  without  some  problems  of  his  own...  walking  back  to  his  agent's  home  as  it  was  the  closest  thing  he  could  get  to.

he  wasn't  expecting  his  agent  to  instantly  try  and  cover  everything  up,  calling  doctors  to  come  visit  daeshim  at  his  home,  sending  people  out  to  clean  up  the  scene  of  the  accident  &  make  sure  that  the  people  who  were  witnesses  or  involved  were  paid  off  to  keep  their  mouth  shut.

that  guilt  weighed  on  him  pretty  instantly,  his  injuries  being  hidden  from  the  media  while  they  healed  and  the  other  people  involved  continued  to  be  paid  off  so  that  no  one  knew  what  had  happened.

he  dealt  with  all  of  that  for  a  few  years  but  after  a  while,  he  couldn't  do  it  anymore.  deciding  to  publicly  declare  he'd  be  taking  a  break  from  making  music,  producing  &  composing...  taking  time  out  for  himself  &  his  own  mental  health  &  wellbeing.

it  was  only  a  week  after  that  when  dae  found  himself  in  london,  hoping  to  be  able  to  start  over  the  best  as  he  could.

                                    personality. ( pt 2. )

literally  the  Worst.

is  a  rich  bitch  and  makes  sure  EVERYONE  knows  that  even  if  he  doesn’t  speak  it… comes  in  the  form  of  his  clothing,  sports  cars,  accessories… literally  everything.

has  kinda  made  a  name  for  himself  in  the  london  that  isn't  to  far  off  from  what  the  media  constantly  talked  about  and  that's  him  being  a  Party  Animal.  goes  to  clubs  /  bars  every  weekend  (  sometimes  more  frequently  depending  on  his  mood.  )  as  well  as  a  bit  of  a  'player’.

extremely  hedonistic  and  a  bit  of  a  shopaholic.  is  always  seen  with  the  latest  &  greatest  makes  and  models  of  things.  always  has  designer  clothes  on.  always  is  out  shopping  for  something  new  at  least  three  times  a  week,  sometimes  more.

can  be  pretty  cocky  at  times,  he  knows  how  he  looks,  he  knows  how  much  money  he  has  and  sometimes  he  lets  that  go  to  his  head  &  his  ego.  though  he  TRIES  not  to  be  like  that  just  because  he  honestly  can’t  stand  when  other  people  boast  about  their  wealth  or  looks  on  a  daily  basis.

is  actually  really  relaxed  when  it  comes  down  to  it,  as  much  as  he  loves  to  party…  there’s  a  part  of  him  that  just  loves  lounging  at  home  watching  movies  just  as  much.  but  usually  refuses  to  do  so  alone,  will  invite  someone  to  come  over  just  so  he  doesn’t  have  to  be  in  his  (  cough…. giant …  cough  )  house  alone.

tends  to  hate  being  told  what  to  do.  comes  from  having  to  conform  to  what  his  agent  /  company  wanted  him  to  do  &  say  for  as  many  years  as  he  did  so  now  he’d  rather  just  do  what  he  wants,  when  he  wants  to  do  it  and  because  of  that  he  can  be  a  little  bit  selfish  sometimes.

he  wants  to  be  able  to  LIVE  and  have  fun,  do  what  he  wants  on  his  own  terms  and  go  from  there.

genuinely  not  a  bad  person,  though  his  ego  &  cockiness  sometimes  tend  to  cover  that  side  of  him  up. as  well  as  the  grief  &  guilt  of  what  he’s  done  in  the  past  causing  him  to  be  extremely  guarded.

loves  to  SPOIL  the  people  he  knows,  if  he  goes  out  shopping,  he’s  probably  buying  something  for  his  friends  in  the  process.  

is  the  type  of  person  that  just  loves  to  give  people  shit  but  does  so  in  a  loving  &  caring  way.  aka  will  roast  you  but  then  offer  to  take  you  to  dinner  or  something  like  that.

he’s …  trying.  not  trying  his  BEST,  sure.  but  he  is  still  trying  and  ig  that  counts  for  something,  right  ?

                                                plot ideas.

flirtationship.  he  absolutely  LOVES  to  flirt  his  ass  off…  with  whoever  he  can  because why  the  hell  not  ?

enemies.  whatever  the  reason  might  be,  they  just  don’t  get  along.  maybe  they  just  bicker  back  and  forth  or  perhaps  they  actually  just  despise  each  other  in  general.

hate  sex.  lsn… i’m  a  sucker  for  this  and  there’s  a  lot  of  reasons  someone  could  dislike  or  hate  dae  &  well  he  also  like  sex  so  why  not  pair  the  two  things  ?

best  friends.  he’s  never  really  had  anyone  he  fully  thought  he  could  rely  on  or  lean  on,  so  someone  he  met  here  who  he  bonded  with  instantly  would  be  gREAT.

will  add  more  as  i  think  of  them  !

[bloojayoolie]

Candy, Doctor, and Facepalm: 15 Dumbest Patients That Doctors Have Had To Deal With. Faith In Humanity Lost. 1. "I'm never going to have a baby because the hospitals don't wash them anymore." She's 30. 2. Ionce had a 20 year old female patient who didn't know that having sex would lead to pregnancy. She had no idea. 3. After looking at the patients chart and seeing she had diabetes- Me: Do you have any medical conditions? Me: Are you sure, you've never been told you have any diseases? Me: What medications do you take? Patient: my diabetes 4. A middle aged lady in the operating theatre once told us at the last minute (as she was being wheeled in) that she's allergic to latex Everyone freaks out cos so much of the stuff we use in theatre has latex in it, so we take her to the latex free theatre and do her there. When she's in recovery and awake I enquire as to what reaction she has to latex. "I just don't really like the sound the latex gloves make, dear". I just turned around and walked out. 5. "No, my fiancée and I don't want our daughter to have any of the vaccines, vitamin K shot, antibiotic eye ointment, or PKU testing. It's poison. Poking her with the needle is worse than the 'cold' she'd get He then drove his newborn daughter and fiancée home in a car that absolutely reeked of weed and cigarettes. 6. year old chief complaint on the board is "private." This should be good. Go in, he is visibly depressed and sad. Tells a story about how he slept with a woman, didn't use protection, and after he noticed she had a "plastic box on her." When she told him it s an insulin pump mortified. Came in immediately to be tested for diabetes he was 7. "I had asthma when I was a child, so stop to raise my daughter just because you think you're smarter than me". Leaves hospital. Back in hospital two hours later; six year old daughter in respiratory failure and admitted 8. "Don't eat or drink anything after midnight the While s 3 year old daughter's next his r the next morning, she vomited scrambled eggs, causing her to aspirate them into her lungs. Her heart stopped, and I did chest compressions orn her for 25 minutes. We got her back, aborted the surgery, and transferred her to pediatric icu on a ventilator. Her father's response..." She said she was hungry. I thought you were being too hard on her. It must have beern something you did to her." 9. Patient had to be told that the reason her son was getting sick at school every day was because she was packing him peanut butter sandwiches and he was allergic to peanuts. She honestly didn't know that was an ingredient, and he was in middle school and wasn't bright enough to realize it himself 10. Had a lady measure her baby's temperature oven and p hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby's forehead. She told the nurse her baby's fever was about 250 degrees. 11. The best was the woman who was feeding her 3 month old dog every few days for no other reason than she thought a dog should only eat that often. Came in for The nurse who spoke with her has no patience for this kind of jacked ignorance, and actually shouted at her "DO YOU EAT EVERY THREE DAYS!?" 12. Once had a patient who was prescribed an inhaler for his cat allergy. He came back a week later saying he was none the better Turns out he was spraying the inhaler on his cat. 13. My favourite was when someone was prescribed estrogen patches and told to stick one patch on herself every other day. At the next follow-up she said she didn't like the patches because she'd been "running out of s I didn't think to clarify to her that she should have been placing a new patch and removing the one from yesterday each day. Very amusing. She indeed was covered in sticky 14. Mom brought her kids to the ER after they ate all of their Halloween candy because they had tummy aches. They were still eating Reese's peanutbutter cups when they were in the exam room. I had to explain to her that they need to cut back on the candy and she looked at me like I had three heads 15. There was this lady who had diabetes and her foot was necrotic. The doctor told her she was going to have to have it amputated, and she said "No, Jesus will heal it for me" (or The Doctor looked at her and said "Maam, you have maggots eating your foot. Jesus wants you to get it amputated."

[astrogeoguy]

Pointing at Polaris, Bright Pre-dawn Planets, and an Enticing Evening Moon!

(Above: Polaris, the Pole Star, is an easy double star visible in backyard telescopes. Look for a small companion near Polaris (yellow arrow) and then trace out the rest of the dim diamond ring asterism. Since the sky revolves around Polaris, the ring of stars can sit in any direction from Polaris.)

Hello, Stargazers! 

Here are your Astronomy Skylights for the week of March 10rd, 2019 by Chris Vaughan. Feel free to pass this along to your friends and send me your comments, questions, and suggested topics. I repost these emails with photos at http://astrogeoguy.tumblr.com/ where all the old editions are archived. You can also follow me on Twitter as @astrogeoguy! Unless otherwise noted, all times are Eastern Time. Please click this MailChimp link to subscribe to these emails. If you are a teacher or group leader interested joining me on a guided field trip to York University’s Allan I. Carswell Observatory or the David Dunlap Observatory, visit www.astrogeo.ca. 

I can bring my Digital Starlab inflatable planetarium to your school or other daytime or evening event, visit DiscoveryPlanitarium.com and request me. We’ll tour the Universe together! 

My latest Mobile Astronomy column for Space.com is about opportunities to see all the spectacular objects in Charles Messier’s list during a single spring night. You can read it here. 

Public Astro-Events

Taking advantage of the moon, Mars, and other bright objects in the sky this week, the RASC Toronto Centre astronomers will hold their free monthly public City Sky Star Party in Bayview Village Park (steps from the Bayview subway station), starting around 7 pm on the first clear weeknight this week (Mon, Tue, or Thu only). You don’t need to be an RASC member, or own any equipment, to join them – looks are free! Check here for details, and check the banner on their website home page or Facebook page for the GO or NO-GO decision around 5 pm each day. 

Every Monday evening, York University’s Allan I. Carswell Observatory runs an online star party - broadcasting views from four telescopes/cameras, answering viewer questions, and taking requests! Details are here. On Wednesday nights they offer free public viewing through their rooftop telescopes. If it’s cloudy, the astronomers give tours and presentations. Details are here. 

At 7:30 pm on Wednesday, February 13, the RASC Toronto Centre will hold their free monthly Speaker’s Night Meeting at the Ontario Science Centre, and the public are welcome. This month, the speaker will be Brittney Cooper, MSc student from York University’s Department of Astronomy. Her topic, Scattering Throughout the Solar System, will cover how light reflects off objects like Saturn’s rings, planet atmospheres, and more. Check here for details. Parking is free. 

On Friday, March 15, starting at 7 pm, U of T’s AstroTour will present their planetarium show Grand Tour of the Cosmos. Tickets and details are here. 

Saturday, March 9 marked the opening of a six-month exhibition at the Aga Khan Museum entitled The Moon: A Voyage through Time. The museum will feature installations of art, culture, history, and science pertaining to the moon. A public talk, The Moon: Mirror of Faith, Science, and the Arts will be delivered by Dr. Christiane Gruber on Saturday at 2:00pm. Details are here. 

Walking the Big Dog

If you missed last week’s write-up about the night sky’s brightest star Sirius, and its constellation Canis Major (the Big Dog), I posted it with sky charts and pictures here. 

(Above: The northern sky from mid-Northern latitudes, viewed here at 9 pm local time on March 11, features the Little Dipper / Ursa Minor and the Big Dipper / Ursa Major. The tail stars of Draco separate the two bears. The outer two stars of the Big Dipper’s bowl can be used to point to Polaris.)

Pointing at Polaris

Polaris, the North Star, is the star at the tip of the handle of the Little Dipper, the asterism we also know as the constellation Ursa Minor (the Little Bear). Contrary to popular opinion, Polaris is not a prominent star at all. It is ranked only 48th in brightness – but nevertheless it can easily be spotted with mere eyeballs in a moderately dark sky, if you know where to look. Polaris is located about 430 light-years from Earth. Its surface temperature is similar to our sun’s, but the star is much larger, and it emits 2500 times the light of our sun. 

Polaris’ fame is due to its steadfast position over the northern horizon. While the rest of the sky revolves due to Earth’s rotation, Polaris remains anchored in place because it sits less than a finger’s width from the North Celestial Pole, the imaginary point in space that the Earth’s axis of rotation points at. Due to Earth’s precession, the slow wobble of the Earth’s axis, Polaris will slowly drifting closer to the pole until the year 2101. The star Thuban in Draco (the Dragon) was the pole star when the pyramids were built. 

You can measure your latitude on Earth by counting how many degrees above the horizon Polaris is. Combine that knowledge with the fact that Polaris marks where the compass direction of north is, and you’re well on your way to figuring out your location on Earth - at least, that’s what folks did before GPS! 

The easiest way to find Polaris is to use the outermost stars in the Big Dipper’s bowl. Join an imaginary line from Merak (the bottom of the bowl) to Dubhe (at the rim of the bowl) and keep going. Polaris is the next obvious star you’ll come to. It’s about three fist diameters from Dubhe. Don’t forget that the Big Dipper, like everything else in the sky, circles around Polaris continuously. Sometimes you’ll be drawing that line upwards, and sometimes to the left or the right. In March annually, you’ll find Polaris it downward and to the left of the dipper. Merak and Dubhe are often referred to as the Pointers. I’ll put a sky chart here. 

If you have a telescope, aim it at Polaris and look for a dim, white-coloured partner star sitting near more yellowish Polaris. Once again, the little star can be anywhere on a circle surrounding Polaris. On mid-March evenings, the companion will be to the lower left, but your telescope’s optics will probably flip it to another orientation. That little star can be joined up with more stars to form a small, roughly circular ring of dim stars on the side of Polaris opposite to the Little Dipper’s bowl. It’s called the Engagement Ring, and Polaris is the diamond. Let me know if you see it. 

In mid-March at around 9 pm local time, the rest of the Little Dipper extends sideways to the right from Polaris, and curves strongly upwards towards the Big Dipper. The two dippers fall on either side of the tail stars of Draco. The magnitude 2.06 star at the outer edge of the Little Dipper’s bowl (and closest to the Big Dipper) is slightly dimmer than Polaris. This medium-cool, reddish star is named Kochab. The other five stars of the constellation may be too dim to see from the city, but binoculars will reveal them. Good luck! 

The Moon and Planets

This week, the moon will entice you to gaze upon it after dinner. It will spend the week waxing fuller while it climbs the western evening sky. When the moon is at this stage of its monthly journey around Earth, the sun is slowly rising over the moon’s eastern horizon. The slanted “dawn” sunlight casts long, deep black shadows to the west (our left) of any elevated feature on the moon – including crater rims, mountain chains, ridges, and fault scarps. For the best views, point your binoculars or telescope along the strip flanking the pole-to-pole line that divides the lit and darkened hemispheres. And remember, when the majority of the side of the moon we see is dark, the far side is mostly lit. In other words, it’s wrong to refer to the part of the moon we never see as the dark side, because it’s only dark half of the time! 

(Above: On Monday evening, the waxing crescent moon will land a palm’s width below Mars, as shown here at 9:30 pm local time. Much dimmer Uranus is in nearby Pisces. The star Menkar, to the left of the moon, is Ceti Alpha of Star Trek canon.)

On Monday evening, the waxing crescent moon will be positioned a palm’s width below Mars. The duo will set at about midnight local time. At the same time, you might notice a rough circle of medium-bright stars to the moon’s left. That’s the head of Cetus (the Whale). The brighter, warm-coloured star positioned a fist’s diameter to the left of the moon is named Menkar. That star’s formal designation is Alpha Ceti, “the brightest star in the whale”. In Star Trek lore, Ceti Alpha V was the planet around that star that James Kirk marooned Khan Noonian Singh and his group on in the Original Series episode “Space Seed”. It was later featured in “The Wrath of Khan”. Take a look! 

On Wednesday evening, the moon will land just below the triangle of medium-bright stars that form the face of Taurus (the Bull). Stargazers in western North America will see the moon approach close to the bright, orange-ish star Aldebaran (the eye of the bull) before both objects set in the west. Wherever you live, look a fist’s diameter to the right of the moon for the Seven Sisters, the small, bright cluster of stars that form the logo for the Subaru car company. The sisters were the daughters of Atlas and Pleione in Greek mythology. We also call this object the Pleiades cluster and Messier 45.  

On Thursday morning, the moon will reach its First quarter phase, when it will sit at a 90° angle from the sun and will appear half-illuminated. First quarter moons rise around noon and set around midnight, so they become visible starting in the afternoon. The term quarter moon refers not to its appearance, but the fact that our natural satellite has now completed the first quarter of its orbit around Earth since the last new moon. 

(Above: On Thursday evening, the First Quarter moon will tickle the toes of Gemini, as shown here at 9 pm local time. Orion’s raised club is at bottom centre.)

On Thursday evening the moon will tickle the toes of Gemini (the Twins). On Saturday night, the waxing gibbous moon will be positioned about a palm’s width to the right (west) of the large open star cluster known as the Beehive or Messier 44 in the constellation of Cancer (the Crab). The moon encounters the cluster frequently because the Beehive is located only 1 degree north of the ecliptic, the great circle around the sky that most solar system objects orbits are close to. To see the cluster’s stars, try placing the bright moon just outside the field of view of your binoculars. The following evening, the moon will hop past the cluster to sit a similar distance to the lower left (east) of the “bees”. 

As I referenced above, Mars will be an easy planet to see every evening this week. When the sky begins to darken, look for Mars as a medium-bright, reddish pinpoint of light less than halfway up the western sky. The Red Planet will set at about midnight local time. Mars has been slowly shrinking in size and brightness as we increase our distance from it little-by-little. 

(Above: The eastern pre-dawn sky, shown here at 7 am local time, features three bright planets. Very bright Jupiter rises first and moves into the southern sky by dawn. Brighter Venus is low in the southeast, and dimmer Saturn sits midway between them.)

The remaining bright planets have been hanging out in the eastern pre-dawn sky, and they’re putting on quite a show. Bright Jupiter will rise first, at about 3 am local time. By 7 am local time, it will be a beacon in the southern sky. Yellowish Saturn, which is somewhat dimmer due to its greater distance from Earth and its slightly smaller diameter, will rise at about 4:45 am local time and will be lost in the twilight by 7 am. 

Our sister planet Venus is now getting markedly closer to the sun and will soon disappear into the dawn twilight. Venus’ blazing brilliance will grace the lower part of the southeastern dawn sky after 6 am local time, and remain in view until sunrise. In a telescope, Venus will exhibit a gibbous (more than half-illuminated) phase. If you have trouble seeing Saturn, search about midway between Jupiter and Venus. I’ll post sky charts for the observable planets here.

Keep looking up, and enjoy the sky when you do. I love questions and requests - so, send me some!

[techcrunchappcom]

New Post has been published on https://techcrunchapp.com/whats-next-devastating-fires-are-latest-challenge-in-west-national-news/

What's next? Devastating fires are latest challenge in West | National News

The dry, windy conditions that fed the flames were likely a once-in-a-generation event, said Greg Jones, a professor and research climatologist at Linfield University in McMinnville, Oregon. The warmer world can increase the likelihood of extreme events and contribute to their severity, he said.

There was some good news Saturday: The same smoke that painted California skies orange also helped crews corral the state’s deadliest blaze this year by blocking the sun, reducing temperatures and raising humidity.

Smoke created cooler conditions in Oregon as well. But it was also blamed for creating the dirtiest air in at least 35 years in some places, “literally off the charts,” the state’s environmental quality spokesperson, Laura Gleim, said.

In Portland, smoke filled the air with an acrid metallic scent like dull pennies. It was so thick that Ashley Kreitzer could not see the road when she headed to work as a driver for a ride-hailing service.

“I couldn’t even see five feet ahead of me,” she said. “I was panicking, I didn’t even know if I wanted to go out.”

People stuffed towels under door jambs to keep smoke out or wore N95 masks in their own homes.

Meanwhile, there was political turmoil as Oregon’s fire marshal was forced out while a half-million state residents were under evacuation warnings or orders to leave. Details were scarce on why he was put on leave then resigned amid a nearly unprecedented disaster.

Oliver, 40, who fled her Portland-area home, has an autoimmune disorder. She was nervous about going to a shelter because of the coronavirus, but her other option was sleeping in a car with her husband, 15-year-daughter, two dogs and a cat.

[lilibug--xx]

I Never Knew

Read on ao3 here

Based on the prompt by @jokerscrown on @bughead-fanfic-wishlist 

Despite her pale skin, frumpy hair, and hospital gown, Jughead thought she was beautiful. She must have thought the same of him, even in her post anesthesia state, because she had just asked him to marry her – even though they had just met.  

Jughead is a nurse! Betty is a patient – She’s a little OOC due to drugs after surgery. But I thought this was a cute little AU idea! 

I’m actually a night shift nurse on an orthopedic unit, so I’m sorry if there’s boring or technical bits! I couldn’t help but have it be a little accurate. Though obviously I would NEVER get involved with a patient.

Should I write a 2nd part? Let me know!

Thin, long fingers smoothed over navy fabric. He brushed some small white hairs to the ground. There were still some persistent ones sticking to the bottom of his scrub top. He didn’t bother with them, instead shooting a glare to his dog that was curled up on the couch sleeping. The shaggy dog blowing out a soft snore, as if he knew he was being watched. He really needed a new lint roller.

He pulled his work beanie on over his dark hair, tugging it down and tucking in the end of the strands hanging in front of his eyes. He pulled his red flannel jacket on, zipping it up and grabbing his gloves. He checked that Hot Dog’s water bowl was filled and left the light above the stove on for him before locking his door to his apartment. It was cold out, enough that his breath was visible, and his throat ached from the cold air. Snow was still sprinkling down after their big flurry yesterday.

The drive to Mercy Hospital, in Riverdale, wasn’t very long at all. He lived on the edge of town in a quiet apartment complex by the river, and it only took him 15 minutes to get there. He was still driving his old beat up truck his father gave him for his 16th birthday. It was about on its last legs, but he was really stretching it. He was working on paying off his student loan before he took on a car payment.

With the hospital coming into view, Jughead grabbed his ID badge out of the center console and flipped it to slide through the card reader at the entrance of the parking garage. The perks of working nightshift, he didn’t have to park in the lot and walk. After going around up to the third floor of the garage, he parked his truck and clipped the badge to the front of his scrub top. He slipped the mirror down, glancing at himself. The name reflected back from the badge always made him frown.

He was still bitter about the fact they wouldn’t let him put Jughead on there. No, had to be his godforsaken actual name. He huffed a sigh, stuffing his keys into his coat pocket and trudging over to the steps and falling in love with the other nurses and aids heading in for their shift. The sun had already set, the orange glow just starting to fade behind the building. He stopped at the Starbucks inside the hospital, grabbing a coffee to drink. He liked night shift, he was a night owl anyway so this worked for him.

He took the elevator up to his unit, orthopedics, and dropped his coat and gloves off in the locker room. He sipped his coffee, gathering his pens and then slinging his black stethoscope around his neck. Since Jughead worked at night there was no management around, so he was able to continue wearing his beanie. He went to the break room and looked briefly at his assignment for the night. Then he sat down on the old flowery couch they had in there, pulling his phone out. They always did a safety huddle before the next shift to discuss the patients on the floor.

Blue eyes scanned his phone, answering a text he had missed from Archie earlier in the day. Jughead was scrolling through Facebook when someone plopped down next to him.

“Hey Jug, you ready for tonight?” Veronica Lodge, one of his co-workers and also friend outside of work. She also happened to be dating his best friend, the aforementioned Archie. Coincidence? Yes, he introduced them after Veronica had stalked his social media pages and found Archie in his photos.

He gave a shrug, “Never really ready. But yeah, I’m ready to get it over with and go home and go back to sleep.” Jughead looked watched her roll her eyes, his own tracking the way she was paying with the string of pearls she always wore. Her hair was up in a bun tonight, with a flowery headband to perk up the navy she was forced to endure.

“Lucky. I have to stay up today. Me and Arch are going out of town this weekend to see his parents. Maybe I can sleep in the car?” she scrunched her face up at the idea. He gave a chuckle, sliding his phone back into the pocket of his shirt. He drummed his fingers against his pants, fingers scratching his knee.

He liked working with Veronica though, so it would make the night go faster, having someone to talk to. They were some of the youngest working on their floor, most of the other nurse’s were more middle aged or in their 30’s.

After their meeting he printed his report sheets and looked over his assignment, waiting for report from the day shift nurse. Jughead had three post up patients, two from a knee replacement and one from surgery on a shoulder fracture. He also had someone waiting for a repeat surgery on their ankle, and one who was a couple days out from a partial hip replacement. He gave a lot of pain medication to these types of patients, as anything to do with bones were generally painful.

He went through his list of patients with the day shift nurse, stopping outside of each room and then going in to meet the patients and check if they needed something. They were on their last one, the most recent post op, the shoulder fracture.

“Elizabeth Cooper, 24, suffered a fall on some ice and fractured her proximal humerus. She had an ORIF done, I’ve only had her an hour so she’s still pretty out of it. She’s got a sling and swathe on, with coverlet dressing.” He looked at his sheet as the nurse spoke, nodding along. He underlined a few of the words so his eyes could find them quickly when needed. He wrote down her pain medications and then they stepped into the room.

The lights were turned down, and he wrote his name on the white board under the ‘nurse’ section. Jughead looked over to the patient and felt his mouth go dry. Even with her eyes closed, blonde hair messy and fanned out on her pillow, and chapped lips he couldn’t help but find her beautiful. He busied himself checking out her oxygen levels and pulse on the machine next to her. They didn’t wake her, Jughead saying he would wait until her meds were due.

After report he went through his patients notes on the computer, looking at what meds they had due, their pain med options, and their lab values. He decided to stop and see room 18, the shoulder patient who was only a year younger than him. He always felt slightly awkward when taking care of younger patients, he always felt more at ease with his older ones.

He entered her room after knocking gently on the door, she didn’t arouse to that. He checked her oxygen and pulse on the monitor, and checked her IV fluids. Pulling her blankets down, he glanced up to her face, she seemed to still be sleeping.

“Elizabeth, I’m just going to take a look at the dressing on your shoulder, and feel your pulses.” He narrated what he was going to do, should she actually be awake. They were always supposed to describe what they were doing.

Jughead unbuttoned the shoulder of her hospital gown on her right side, taking a look at the dressing there. He felt around it, feeling the temperature and noting the swelling. He buttoned her back up, fingers traveling down to where her wrist was peeking out the sling. He felt her pulse with his  fingers, and checked the capillary refill on her fingertips.

“Alright,  Elizabeth, I’m going to listen to your heart and lung sounds now, okay?” he positioned his stethoscope in his ears and held it over her gown in all the spots he needed to assess her properly. Once he was done, he took a peek at her IV site in her left arm to make sure it was working properly and then walked over to the computer in the room. He charted a few things, checked her diet orders, and then went to fetch a cup of ice chips to put on her table.

When he came back he had leant over her to place the cup on the table to her left, rather than walk all the way around the bed. Suddenly her hand shot out and fisted in his scrub top, yanking him down towards her. “You.. have GOT to be the sexiest.. man I’ve ever seen,” her voice was wavering in and out of quietness and above appropriate volume, her words slightly slurred. He chuckled at her, the glazed over look in her green eyes telling him all he needed to know.

“Now, Elizabeth, while that might be true you can’t talk to your nurse that way,” Jughead covered her hand with his, unclenching her fingers from the material of his shirt. She shook her head quickly at his words and then clenched her eyes shut tightly, bringing her good hand up to her forehead. “Ohhh.. dizzy,” she moaned, head pressing back into her pillow.

He rolled his eyes at her and put the head of her bed back a little. “Do you know where you are right now?” he questioned, crossing his arms over his chest. Her eyes opened again and he couldn’t help but glance towards them. Bright, wide, mesmerizing – were just a few words that popped into his head. His lips tightened in a small frown.

“Uh, yeah, duh.” She snorted, trying to wiggle around in the bed.

He raised an eyebrow at her, one hand gesturing for her to continue. “And where is that?”

“The hospital, silly.” she whispered at him, giggling.

“Which hospital?”

“Umm, Greendale?” Jughead shook his head at her, lips quirking up a little.

“Not quite, you’re still in Riverdale.”

“Shit, don’t tell my mother that I’m here,” she groaned, bringing her hand up to her face and swiping it down dramatically.  

“Elizabeth I think you-“

“Don’t call me that.” she shouted over him, her hand reaching out and grabbing one of his crossed arms. He grabbed her hand with his, folding it back to her side.

“What should I call you then?” he asked simply, as he himself didn’t like his name, so who was he to judge?

“Call me Betty,” She licked her lips, eyes drooping a little as her voice got softer.

Jughead’s tongue reached out, licked his bottom lip. “Betty,” he tested out. Her face lighting up in a small smile. Her hand reach out to him again, clawing weakly at his crossed arms. “You can call me Jughead.” He offered in return.

“You’re so nice, will you marry me Jughead?” she proposed, her eyes slipped closed. Fingers falling from his arm, her lips parting and breathes evening out. He shook his head at her, wondering when the anesthesia was going to be out of her system. People did and said weird things after surgery, so he was pretty immune. However when a beautiful young blonde says stuff like this? He couldn’t help his heart racing a little.

He left the room with a promise to check on her falling on deaf ears.

He saw his other patients and dished the rounds of evening meds before grabbing a drink of water and sitting at the nurse’s station. He sat across from Veronica, booting up the computer.

“So, I just had one of my patients ask me to marry them,” just casual conversation, right?

Veronica snorted, the coffee she was sipping on settled back on the table. “You get marriage offers like, once week Jug,” her eyes were still glued to the computer screen, blue light reflecting off the reading glasses she wore when working with the computers.

“I’ll have you know that this wasn’t an old lady,”

A perfectly arched brow rose, her eyes then lifting and looking up at him across the desk. “Color me intrigued then,”

“It was this young patient I have, around our age. She’s really attractive, despite laying in a hospital.” He was a little smug, however he left out the part about her being high off meds.

“Well, well, well. What an interesting development.” She seemed to ponder for a moment, finger tapping her lip as she looked up to the ceiling.

“How can we hook you up without it being totally weird?”

Jughead rose his own eyebrows in response, reaching a hand up and scratching at his hair under his beanie. “Uh, no right answer there, Ronnie.” It was never good to look up patients after they left your care – and certainly not to give them your number.

She shook her head at him, eyes turning devious as she smirked. “I can.. look her up on social media because she’s not MY patient and then we can find out-“

“I don’t think that’s-”

“-though she might not be working for a while now since she had shoulder surgery,”

“- not a good idea.”

“Maybe I can ask for her number? Or maybe we can send Archie in there as a visitor or send her flowers-“

“Okay, enough, Ronnie.” He raised his voice a little to get her attention, lips dipping down into a frown at her. She tended to go a little crazy when it came to this kind of stuff. “I don’t even know if she’s single-”

“Yes she is, says it right here.” She had shoved her phone in his face from across the desk. He leaned back a bit, glaring up at her, but he couldn’t help but take a peek down to her phone. There was Betty’s Facebook profile, including picture which she looked like a model in – all tanned skin, pink glossy lips, hair falling in waves about her shoulders. Her smile was so beautiful, she was beautiful. He felt this mouth go a little dry and he cleared his throat, shaking his head at Veronica.

“It’s not gonna happen Veronica.” He used her name in warning, going back to his work on the computer. She let out a ‘tsk’ and sat back down. He knew this wasn’t likely to be the end of It though.

He finished his charting, crossing off the meds he had given and tasks he had done on his sheet of paper. He folded it up and put it in the pocket on the front of his scrub top. He decided to go check on Betty again.

Luckily he did because she was already halfway out of bed, still attached to her leg pumps, the IV line, and oxygen monitor. “Woah, woah, lets sit you back down.” He rushed over to her putting a hand on her good shoulder and holding her steady as she plopped back down on the bed sheepishly. He stepped back, untangling all the cords attached to her. “What were you doing getting up by yourself?”

“I’m sorry, I have to pee..” Betty’s pale cheeks were now flushed red and she was chewing on her lower lip. Her free hand was clenching the edge of her gown by her knees.

“That’s okay, you’re allowed to have to pee. I guess I didn’t get a chance to explain the call button before you passed out.” He pulled the wraps off her legs, and noticed her bare feet. He walked over to the linen cabinets in the room and grabbed a pair of the hospital grey non-slip socks. Bending down he grabbed her ankle, lifting her foot up a little, fingers sliding over the delicate skin there, cool to the touch. He slipped her socks on, trying not to think anything else about her legs or ankles and how they might feel locked around his hips.

“Alright, I’ll help you to the bathroom and push your IV pole for you.” He wrapped his arm around her left one, hauling her up. He had either underestimated his strength or her weight because she came up quickly and hard into his chest. He righted her position, letting her gather her balance.

“Feel okay?” he looked her over, making sure she wasn’t going to pass out or fall. She nodded at him, stretching her legs a little before starting to walk to the bathroom across the room. Jughead tugged the IV pole along behind her, holding the back of her gown closed for her privacy. They made it to the bathroom and she slipped inside while he slid the door closed standing just outside.

He let out a slow sigh, leaning his head against the wood door. Closing his eyes he tried to get rid of thoughts clouding his vision, the glimpse of her naked back before he quickly pulled her gown closed.

Jughead heard the toilet flush and he waited a moment, stepping back from the door. He heard the water faucet turn on and then a moment later, the door slid open. She was throwing a paper towel away and peeking through the opening up at him. She was chewing on her lip again.

“Could you…” she paused, the words seeming to fail her. She cleared her throat, touching the base of it before running a hand through her hair, pulling some strands behind her ear. “Could get into my bag and find my underwear?” her cheeks were a pretty flushed red, dipping down to her chest and underneath the gown.

He chuckled a little at her embarrassment and smiled at her. “Of course,” he walked back to the bed, a green linen bag sitting on the bedside table. He looked through it, hands ruffling the different fabrics inside until he found a scrap of light blue lace that had to be underwear because it surely couldn’t be anything else. He held it up stretching it out between his fingers just to check. Yep. Cheeky.

He shuffled back to the bathroom and knocked on the partially open door. Betty turned back from where she was trying to finger comb her hair in the mirror. He held the underwear out to her, dangling from the tip of his index finger. He rose his eyebrows, leaning against the doorway. She snatched them from his hand, avoiding his eyes.

She looked at then in her grasp and then down to her socked feet. Her green eyes found his, her head tilting a little. “Could you just.. hold onto me while I put these on? I don’t think I can balance myself just yet.”

He nodded, “Sure, “ he then placed a steadying hand on her upper arm, fingers curling around her bicep and applying some pressure. She seemed a little dazed for a second before bending down a little and stepping  into the underwear, slipping the fabric up her legs. As she pulled herself upright, she dipped forward and Jughead tightened his grip on her arm, pushing her upright. “Careful,” he reminded her, as her hand disappeared underneath her gown, the fabric shoved up high on her thighs.

He couldn’t stop himself from looking.

She was finished a second later, the fabric fluttering back down around her knees. He let go of her arm then. She then turned her back to him, no longer holding the gown closed. He could see the whole of her back, all smooth skin peppered with freckles, only a couple inches hidden by the sling and swathe that held her arm close to her chest. He could also see that her underwear could barely be considered such.

“Would you tie me?” he looked at him in the mirror, a small smirk on her face now. She had seen how he looked at her.

Fingers darted out, tugging the strings on each side of the gown to meet together, overlapping so that her backside wasn’t on display anymore. He gave a little cough, guiding the IV pole behind her as she walked back to bed. Once he got her settled in and comfortable sitting upright he gestured to the ice chips. “Thirsty? Hungry?”

She looked at the cup, tongue darting out and licking her lower lip. “I mostly just have a dry mouth,” Betty was reaching out for the spoon, taking a spoonful of ice and crunching down.

Jughead crossed his arms over one another, a hand at his mouth. He observed her, the way that the walk back and forth to the bathroom made her even more tired. As if on cue, she yawned.

“Are you having any pain?” he questioned, glancing to her shoulders, which she were holding tightly. Her eyes flicked up to him, mouth around a spoonful of ice. She seemed to think about his question, dropping the spoon to her bedside table with a sigh.

“Yes. It’s not terrible, but it does hurt.” She seemed guilty, like she didn’t want to complain.

“Do you want to take some pain medication?” she frowned at his words, fingers of her left hand fingering the ones on her right that she said were still a little numb. The actual shoulder is the first part to wake up from a nerve block, so he knew it was likely to only get worse.

“I guess so.. just some thing small though, I just want to try and go back to sleep. Forget this day even happened,” she trailed off. Leaning her head back against her pillow. Her eyes fluttered closed and she rubbed the side of her forehead.

Jughead was glad that it seemed she was over that med high phase, and agreed that something small would be a good idea, they could always take something more later.

He gathered up a cup of jello, some water and a packet of saltine crackers along with a pain pill. He encouraged her to eat both as they would help with any nausea with pain meds might cause.

She managed to eat both while he was scanning the med in and doing a little charting while he waited. She downed the pill and then he laid her head back some, fetching a warm blanket to throw over top of her. He had given her the call button this time with a promise to come check on her in a little while. As he was turning to leave, her hand caught his arm, stopping him.

“Thank you, Jughead.” She said, testing out the name he had given her earlier despite his badge reading ‘Forsythe’. He was a little surprised that she remembered their conversation from earlier at all. Maybe that was why she had been so embarrassed, because of the things she had said. “I really appreciate everything you’re doing.”

He gave her a little smile, pulling his arm away and giving her hand a small squeeze before backing up towards the door. “It’s my job, Betty.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Thank you,” she repeated, more softly this time. Her hand falling to her chest and clutching the warm blanket against her chest. Her eyes closed and he turned the light in the room off, cracking her the door to her room.

He stopped in the hallway, the smile on his face reflecting the happiness in his heart. He never knew he could love his job so much.

Maybe he would see what Veronica could do to help him after all. He could tell Betty was the kind of person he wanted to get to know.

[jessicaxnicole]

November 15, 2012

I have wanted to write about this night since it happened, but yet here I am, almost 5 years later trying to figure out where to even begin. To protect myself from purging my emotions all at once, I have had to write this bit by bit. I haven’t allowed myself to think deeply about that night, let alone write about every detail. Part of me feels like I have put it off for so long because in a way, once I write it, reality will painfully set in even more. Another part of me feels like once I let it all out, I will finally get rid of this anchor sitting on my chest. I guess I will find out as I type and at this moment, i’m at a loss for words.

Something about that day, from the moment I woke up, didn’t feel right.. I should have been ecstatic because I was just getting ready to sign a lease for a beautiful townhouse with my friend but everything about the day just felt eery. The weather, my mood, everything just felt gray and I couldn’t put my finger on what it was causing me to feel this way. Driving home, I called my mom briefly and talked to her about the plans for the townhouse. At the time, I was already dealing with depression and happened to be seeing a counselor the following day in harrisonburg. So it made sense to also finalize everything with the townhouse since it was right down the road. Mom and I had a whole day planned out - go to my appointment, finalize the lease, and then a chipotle date since mom had never been. I was so excited because we never got to spend this kind of time together due to her job. Little did I know that my world was about to be completely rocked in a matter of 8 hours. The oncoming hours, are moments that I will always regret for the rest of my life. I felt depressed and all I wanted to do was get in bed and sulk in my emotions. At the time, I was taking Xanax (something I personally don’t recommend) because I just wanted to go to sleep and forget about everything. Mom had just gotten home from work and was getting ready to start her nightly ritual - cook me something for dinner, finish her charting from patients she saw that day, and watch a movie. She came upstairs to say hello and love on me per usual but I just pushed her away. I told her I just wanted another xanax so I could go to sleep. She tried cuddling up to me and again, I was just cold and distant. After a few minutes she got up and told me to come downstairs to watch a movie if I wanted, then left my room. If only I knew that was the last time I would get to talk to my mom, cuddle with her, see her beaming smile, and feel her unconditional love, I would have done it all so differently. But thats the shitty thing about life, you take for granted the most important moments and then its too late.

Mom went downstairs to finish her charting and a few minutes later my boyfriend at the time arrived and came upstairs to my room. One of the first things he said to me was that my mom was acting strange and didn’t speak to him much which was the complete opposite from her normal loving self. I didn’t really think much of it at the time because I literally just saw her moments before, so I completely ignored it.

The following events are honestly somewhat of a blur so bare with me if there are little gaps. I don’t know how to explain where my brain went during everything. I just know it all happened so quickly and oddly at the same time it was like I was watching my entire world fall apart in slow motion. We were getting ready to leave when I heard a huge crash. It reminded me of the time my moms beautiful picture hung up in the kitchen came shattering down to the floor. The only difference between both times is that when I yelled for mom, I didn’t get a response this time. My heart immediately started racing and I bolted to go run downstairs. That’s when I got to the top of the stairs and saw her laying face down on our kitchen floor. Her phone was thrown half way across the room, there was glass everywhere from a drink she was holding, and then I saw blood start to appear. I just remember screaming “MOM” and running down the steps. By the time I got to the bottom of the steps, there was a pool of blood filling so quickly and at the time, I didn’t even realize where it was coming from or what had happened. I started shaking her gently to see if she would wake up and again, no response. Her breathing was so strange, I still to this day can’t describe it. I started screaming at my boyfriend to find my phone and call 911 and of course, for whatever reason, my phone would not connect to 911. We finally were able to call on his phone and within minutes a cop was at my house. I just remember running outside screaming at the cop. I don’t even recollect what i was saying, I just know she kept telling me to calm down and tell her what happened while she followed me inside. As soon as she saw my mom she immediately began asking me if my mom was on blood thinners and a number of questions. Dad was not home but I had already called him at this point and then began calling everyone else I could think of that needed to know. The next few moments are honestly a complete blur to me, I just know my dad and the ambulance arrived at the same time. There was so many people, so many flashing lights and sirens, so many questions projected at me, all at once. I overheard one medic say they wanted to try to land Pegasus in our back yard, heard another say her eyes showed signs of a stroke. The next thing I know they’re landing the helicopter on 262 and mom was being flown to UVA.

As we’re in the car on the way to the hospital, I honestly thought she was going to be fine. I don’t know why I thought that considering the state she was in. When we arrived, we were immediately escorted into a “family room” and that’s when I knew something wasn’t right. I remember thinking why aren’t we being taken to her room? Where is my mom at? What the f*** is going on? The room just felt cold, not as in temperature cold, but the feeling it gave. It was just plain, with tissues on every single table. Nothing about that room gave me a good feeling and all I wanted was to get out and find my mother immediately.

That’s when the doctor walked in…I could tell by the pained look on his face that something really was not right. He then sat down next to dad and I and began telling us that mom must have had a fall that caused severe, irreversible brain trauma and that there was nothing they could do for her. I don’t remember anyone else’s reaction in the room and honestly its probably better that way. I do recall practically attacking him with so many crazy, ridiculous questions like i was some doctor. Honestly I wish I could apologize for some of the stupid shit I said but in those moments I had no control over my reactions. For instance, I asked him if they could drill a hole in her head to relieve pressure/blood but then he had to explain just how severe the trauma was, and how drilling a hole would only make it worse. My dumb self even began to ask if he could do a transplant but then thats when common sense kicked in and I realized how stupid I sounded and shut up (and btw, of course I know you cannot do that).

Part of my brain completely shut off any memory of what happened when they took us to her room. The parts I do recall are just of me running frantically back and forth between her room and the hallway. I couldn’t handle seeing her like that so I’d bolt out the room, just to turn right around and come back because I didn’t want to leave her side. Mom was always the one taking care of us, so knowing I couldn’t do a damn thing to help her was and is still the most helpless feelings in the world.

The doctors began talking about the decisions and plans we needed to make because time was a factor. If we wanted to donate her organs, we would need to pull her off life support within the next few hours. If we didn’t want to donate, we could keep her on life support but that was the only thing keeping her alive. My mom never wanted to live life if she couldn’t do what she loved and help everyone around her. Like I mentioned before, she was always the one providing care, and she never wanted anyone to have to care for her. To be on life support and have everyone taking care of her was something she did not want. Her and dad apparently had a conversation about if something were to happen and he ultimately made the decision to honor her wish by choosing to donate her organs. She without a doubt was the most selfless human beings I have ever met and I’m so glad I could help chose to let her “give back” one last time by donating.

The following day, November 16, 2012, was when she was officially pronounced dead. For me though, I will always consider the 15th the day she really left us. Dad and I were already home during the time she passed and we believe she decided to give us one last “goodbye”. Dad was downstairs when he heard someone open and close the door to let my dog in. When he went in the living room to see who it was, no one was there. I, at the time, was trying to sleep and drown out everything that just occurred when I had the strangest dream. I dreamt dad and I were standing in some field, talking to mom, except we couldn’t physically see her. I just remember her saying “I’m okay honey, I love you so much”  over and over. The harsh reality of course would set in the moment I woke up.

To this day, we do not know what made her fall the way she did. She was only on the second step heading upstairs when she fell. The doctors say that she practically did a head dive into the floor and more than likely she had suffered from an aneurysm or a stroke before the fall. Unfortunately, we will never know exactly what happened because the autopsy wasn’t able to determine due to the severity of brain damage. Except, I know for a fact that if my mom was conscious or able, she would have attempted to catch herself. That is something I am still trying to find peace in.

To say the past 5 years have been hard, would be an understatement. Although, I can honestly say I am finally happy with where I am in life now. Everyday I try to remind myself of what my mom would want and how I can strive to be just like her. She would want me to be happy and successful in whatever I am passionate about. It may have taken going to hell and back but again, I am finally where I need to be in life and that is all that matters. I still have a ways to go and more growing to do but honestly, I am proud of how far I have come. Everything I do is for you, Mom.

[theoneandonlysaucymo]

Once Upon a Dream

Prompt: Steve Rogers X Reader oneshot

Words: 1,500

A/N: Im working on these fics heres a little oneshot ive been working on for a few months now......school is a joy kill for writing then getting back into it is tough too lol. Well enjoy!

Tags: @hymnofthevalkyries @mylittlefandomfanfictions @feelmyroarrrr  @angryschnauzer @hellomissmabel @hollycornish

My MasterPost

               He didnt remember falling asleep, he remembered the burst of  cold, glass shattering around him gasping for air at the shock, his body hurt but then in a flash went numb. He couldn’t remember anything else just easily falling asleep the freezing temperatures taking over.

           Then it was like he never went to sleep. He was in a small cafe, sitting right outside looking at what appeared to be New York? It sounded like New York, cabs honking away, cars idling far longer than drivers would’ve wished to, sound of different shoes all walking down the street. The streets looked different, however, large screens displayed ads, the buildings were mostly made of glass and metal, the bricks replaced with stronger material. There he sat looking around glancing to his right as a woman with Y/H/C and bright Y/E/C worked over some books. She had a strange device she was typing away at then flipping away at a large book. He at least knew a textbook when he saw one but even then...that book was massive. She was lost in her own little world and something about that mesmerized him, she was beautiful messy bun, no make up, tired eyes and all, he could've stare at her all day. She had seemed to notice the time, closing her strange device she was typing at, gathering her things, and it all seemed to fade away to black.

           It didnt stay black for long. The next place, he was in central park sitting on a bench near the statue of two eagles and a ram. This place at least had not chanced from his memory, he remembered coming here walking the park and seeing that statue many times. It wasnt the statue that caught his eye, that woman was here again this time sitting on a blanket in the grass, warm sun shining down to help light the pages of her book again. It was another textbook, she must've been a very dedicated student but a bark caught his attention as he saw a small corgi running towards her being led by another. The womans face sitting down, lit up as she greeted the dog her textbook closed and forgotten for the time being. He watched her hair shining in the sunlight throwing a ball for the dog who happily bounced back with it. It was her smile he couldnt take his eyes away from, it was bright taking up her whole face as she looked relaxed and happy.

           That world faded out again, next it was an apartment dimly lit, he could see the woman again this time at a kitchen table still dressed in what looked like scrubs. Papers were thrown about, crumpled sheets lined the floor around her as she wrote another word before crumpling that paper as well. She was so focused on the work infront of her it seemed she barely noticed how late it was. She let out a cute yawn sitting back finally and rubbing her eyes looking up at the clock sighing in defeat for the moment before he saw her close a book and head off down the hall. He waited not sure if he should follow but before he could move her phone went off and she was rushing back down the hall grabbing her jacket and keys and quickly leaving the house. He was suddently in a hospital busy night from the looks of it and there she was running around with medical charts, bags heavy under her eyes but she still had a smile as she went from room to room.

           The fading seemed to come quicker now, he didnt spend as much time as the first time. He couldn't hear noises anymore, the things arounud him started to blur and he heard a faint sound of a radio. He was at the cafe again, this time sitting across from her. She had headphones in tapping her foot in the air to the song. She just had a cup of coffee in front of her, no books, no massive amounts of paper, just a woman relaxed. Well mostly relaxed, she was still in scrubs so whatever she had been studying for she apparently had passed. The normal calm of a busy city was quickly interrupted when he heard screaming, he didnt know exactly what was happening. Buildings were being blown to bits, debris falling below, cars over turning as what looked like gunfire was the cause. He wanted to look around but it was all a giant blur, only thing he could see was that woman again, same small café this time she was trying to help someone. Everything around him continued to fall into chaos this woman continued to try and help. Then he saw something he tried to react to, he tried to stop getting in the way of the flying debris but it went straight through him hitting her. He turned around but didn’t see her at first, panic set in as he couldn’t find her and as hard as he tried to stay in this moment everything was turning black.

           The next time his eyes opened...Steve was in a room a baseball game playing on the radio and the sun shining through a window. Something wasn’t right, he had been to that game sat in the nose bleeds but....he had been there. A knock at his door startled him, he was starting to process this time....this time wasn’t a dream. He could smell the woman’s perfume, feel the stiff sheets below him, he could vaguely hear  other sounds....not the radio but other things muffled. His mind went to that girl again, just everything here felt so wrong he had to get out. Little did he know...that room had been the most normal thing. When he ran out of the building the whole city had changed his senses were overwhelmed....this was certainly not a dream anymore.

           It took awhile....a very long while for Steve to even slightly adjust to his home city again. Everything had advanced he was still excited about seeing Stark technology now.....that was something he couldn’t even begin to comprehend. Everyone carried around a phone in their pocket...not on a wall...no more chords attacked, accept to power it up again, and they were addicted to them. This world had advanced so much he just felt like a man out of his time. He sat at a coffee shop notebook on the table sketching trying to remember what this city used to look like. People a bit more friendly, not as much of a tourist spot, and  more green space too. He had been visiting every coffee shop around New York he could. He knew all that before was a dream but....he could hope anyways, hope to see that girls smile again. He was just about to give up when close to Tony’s building he managed to get a glimpse of her. It was brief and he had almost missed it, dressed in scrubs name badge he could finally see, he had held the door open for her as she carried a large order of coffee. She smiled thanking him looking up at him with bright and shining Y/E/C eyes before heading back down the street disappearing in the mass of people. Steve could have kicked himself but at least now he had a name, Y/N.

           Trouble seemed to always find Steve and sure enough another part of his dream was starting to come true. He could now see those blurs flying around were these aliens from another world. People were fleeing from every corner trying desperately to get away from the chaos. An all too familiar scene was starting to play out as he darted through the streets trying to get people off them and into the underground. He stopped dodging a crashing  ship before he looked over spying the Café. His eyes went wide when he saw her just as before helping someone getting them out of harms way before going back for someone else. His body reacted rushing for her events playing out just like that dream a large piece of debris falling right above her, she was clueless again too busy worrying about others. He reached out this time he could touch her as he pulled away from where she was behind him, his shield coming up as he took the brunt of the weight of the falling debris protecting her from him. This time when he turned around she was safe, her Y/E/C looking up at him with a bit of shock not sure what had just happened and where this guy came from. Steve held out his hand to help her off the ground.

           “Thank you...have we met?” She asked looking at him with a bit more detail now. His face looked familiar.

           “Steve Rogers, and I don’t think so,” Steve lied through his teeth but smiled at her blocking a blast from a ship whizzing by. “Let’s get you and these people off the street.”

           “I'm not sure how I can thank you,” She smiled as Steve followed her in helping the last person to the subway entrance and she paused looking at him before she too was to head down.

           “How about  coffee with me after all this?” Steve smiled, “May need to pick a new place.” She smiled up to him and laughed with a nod

            “I think coffee may be a fair enough trade Mr. Rogers.” 

[noisykate]

Afloat, Atlantic

22 May 2019

We found Simon, and Carl, picking them both up in Lindbergh Bay, a short walk from the airport, beating a hasty retreat both times to get away from parties on the beach. Billed as “calypso” music, it sounded more like mostly rap and banal auto-tuned dance music, stupendously loud. We were 200m off the beach, but could not hold a conversation over it.

We retreated to Honeymoon Bay, and sat about enjoying their excellent fruit smoothies, and the beach vibe, a particular shock for Simon who was still only hours away from a damp and grey UK.

A frustrating time trying to use the beach internet for some last communications – sorted eventually, then went for another swim.

Last preparations next day took us back into the main bay off the Crown Dock, nearer the supermarket. No onions or potatoes, uninspiring meat selection – supply boat ‘due in’, apparently. Mike took a separate trip to another shop for the onions and potatoes.

Filled up with water, petrol, gas, and diesel, and waddled round back to Brewers bay for a quiet night before setting off. Holding tank blocked. Exciting ‘bonding’ exercise for crew, diving under the boat with the dinghy pump, to unblock it. Deck showers all round, to clean up after.

Left the following morning on 14th May, in light to moderate winds, and made reasonable progress for a short while before the wind settled down to less than 10 knots, where it has stayed, barring one or two modest squalls, ever since. It is currently the middle of the night, and we are gently bobbing along at about 2 knots, in almost flat water. We have been motoring a bit, but clearly cannot motor all the way, so provided the motion of the boat is ok, we are sailing. 1500 miles to go.

All is well aboard, although the desperately slow progress is disappointing, and frustrating.

The holding tank blocked again, and took another few squirts from the dinghy pump to clear it. This was accomplished swinging in the bosuns chair suspended from the main halyard, held forward by another line off the bow. The sudden gush of released holding tank content is largely avoidable to the swimmer, although the overflow spray from the tank vent above the head is not. Water surprisingly warm.

We have been discussing recipes for pasta-with-tinned-pears and similar, against the possibility that we are still out here, subsisting on rice and pasta and the last few tins, in three months’ time. The chart plotter does a simple calculation of estimated overall journey time based on current speed and distance-left-to-cover, and at one point yesterday flashed up a predicted 230 days, before giving up and putting flashing dots in the space. We were hoping to be in Horta by early June. May be a bit longer, although we hope not 230 days.

We are in touch with other boats and the Seven Seas Cruising Association Net every day, reporting our position and catching general news from others. Most people are reporting similarly light and slow conditions, although those further north (who left a week ahead of us) are now in better winds, confidently pronouncing themselves ‘7 days out from Horta’.  The SSB has been great, now that we have realised reception is improved if we do not use the radio-wave-producing generator while trying to communicate.

29 May 2019

We are bobbing along, still beset by weak winds, jogging along at 1.5-3 knots. The predicted time-to- target at one point flashed up 1403 days, or something around 4 years. I think that means it had us doing a complete circumnavigation via both poles. Over 22000 miles. At a toddler’s walking pace.

We have had some stronger winds, for a single day pushing us along at 7 knots. Now heading further north, hoping to miss a windless area currently sitting south of the Azores. Currently running at about 4 knots, with 8 knots of wind over the boat, spinnaker and mizzen staysail all up.

Carl managed to lose one of our decent bowls overboard, the wind catching it while he was skiffing out some chicken bones.  His meals are now being served in the ‘dog bowl of Shame’.

Food seems to be holding out ok, nobody complaining at least. The cake mixes are working well in the new omnia; still getting used to the controlling the temperature of the thing, as it tends to burn if left too high.

Last night was almost entirely windless, and we ran the engine for a few hours to make some progress. Otherwise, the boat is surprisingly noisy when the wind drops – the rig flops around, banging hard against the stops, everything clattering around. Impossible to sleep.

On the plus side, the night was exquisite, the sky clear and bright with stars, the sea glowing and sparkling with fluorescence in the wake of the boat, occasional ghostly passes by one of our resident shearwaters, which have so far followed us for a thousand miles. They are so graceful, skimming the water, absolutely in tune with their environment. They must nest ashore somewhere, but they are absolutely at home here miles from land.

31 may 2019

Still jogging along, now with twin headsails, making about 5 knots, pointing more or less at the Azores.

The SSB net advises that Horta is ‘heaving’, with the ARC boats all assembled for their last leg on to the UK. They plan to leave on Saturday, apparently, so we should miss them.

Simon has been fretting that he might miss his flight on 11th June – now looking reasonably hopeful that we might make it.

4 June 2019

All getting pretty fed up. The wind has turned against us, and is predicted to stay this way for a couple of days. For a while it was looking as if we might make it for Simon’s flight on Sunday, but that chance slipping away, with us now jogging along 60o away from our target at 4 knots, which gives us less than 2 knots towards the target. The total distance left to run is now less than 300 miles, but it is creeping downward so very, very slowly. We will motor if and when the opportunity presents itself, but there is no point while there is a sea running against us – we would be making perhaps 3knots towards Horta, not enough to justify the fuel. The wind is predicted to veer further north by Thursday, but that does leave it incredibly tight for Simon’s flight – we may not make it.

We have plenty of tinned and dried food aboard, so are some weeks away from starvation, but we have now run out of potatoes, vegetables, meat and butter, and are low on cheese, milk and eggs.

The rig is holding up ok, although we do have some minor breakages. The cast fitting which holds the outhaul and the topping lift on the end of the boom has broken. We have fashioned a temporary repair, but to fix it properly we would need to replace the broken fitting, not a job we can do while under way. The other problem is the mizzen sail – the new sail has been working well, but for reasons which are not clear, the batten cars are coming undone, scattering little stainless components over the deck, not all of which we have managed to recover. It seems the assemblies are held together with a split ring, and for some reason these are coming undone although they are not under direct load, allowing the main loadbearing pin to work its way out. The main sail has the same design car, but for some reason these have not been affected, at least so far. We will be in touch with the sailmaker when we arrive, hoping to get some spares.

Otherwise, nothing much to report. Conditions aboard are ok, although we are all looking forward to clean bedding and some fresh clothes. Deck showers were a treat, but the weather has turned colder, and that is now not a viable option. We are bouncing around a bit, too, so being on the foredeck starkers and covered in soap is not ideal.  

Sargasso weed has pretty much gone – we were seeing rafts of it, some quite large. Instead, we now see jellyfish – we think they are Portuguese man-o-war, extraordinary things, looking like glass ornaments. There are a lot of them – swimming is not an attractive option.

Carl and Simon are taking it in turns to sleep in the main salon, as both forward cabins are bouncier than our cabin in the back of the boat, under these conditions. It has been ok up to now, but heading into the wind makes it all more lively.

It is also noticeably colder – we are all in long sleeves and long trousers, hats and gloves for night-watches, and have put the duvet back on the bed for the first time in many, many months. Up to now, we have been sleeping under a lightweight cotton throw, if that.

Dandelion has arrived in Horta, and although we can just make them out, the SSB is not working so well – apparently other masts nearby bleed the signal. We catch some of what they say, but conversation is difficult.

We did pass another boat the other day – a little 9.5m Maxi with two people on board. We were dribbling along at about 3 knots, but they were even slower, and we passed them as if they were stopped. Said hello, and established that they too are headed for Horta, so we’ll look out for them when we get there.

The plan was to stay in the Azores for perhaps 10 days, but this trip has been so very slow, I think we all just want to get the next leg over with. Maybe come back out to the Azores another time. Maybe.

6 May 2019

We saw two humpback whales! Not close, but very clear, saw their fins and regular blows. Carl spotted them, and I woke Simon up so he could see them as well – not sure this was wholly appreciated, but seemed like the right thing to do at the time!

We’ve seen dolphins several times – not sure what sort they are; smallish, dappled grey. Not the large ‘Atlantic’ dolphins we saw off Brittany, or the small, plump Baltic dolphins. These are sleek, agile and incredibly fast. The ease with which they keep up with the boat shows just how far we still have to go in developing efficient watercraft.

Bread on the stove again this morning – I mixed it up last night, and put the heat under it this morning.

Now less than 155 miles to run – all keen to get this over with, now. Weather is now grey and overcast, the wind 15-20 knots from just west of north. We are, at least, pointing straight at Horta now, after several frustrating days tacking towards it and making very little progress. Our track looks like the trail of a drunk – at one point, we sailed three sides of a square for several hours.

Tinned chilli, with additional tinned beans, topped with tinned potatoes, makes a passable dinner.

10 June 2019

So we did get here eventually – John and Sue met us outside the harbour in their dinghy, and we tied up alongside a large (60’, £2M) plastic bendytoy to check in. Unfortunately, the complement aboard this boat were unwelcoming, unhelpful and arrogant, so it was with some relief we moved on to an assigned berth elsewhere, alongside a French boat – turned out it was the same French boat we met in Clarence Town, weeks ago. They left later that evening, en route for Gibraltar.

Horta is lovely, the food wonderful - and cheap - after the nasty and comically overpriced rubbish in the Bahamas.

We have spent a couple of evenings with John and Sue and various of their friends; last night aboard Kealoha V, Carl and John serenading us with an eclectic mix of songs on John’s guitar, including a hilarious version of Stairway to Heaven. A good time.

Photos - always a trial to load - may follow...