#what we do know is that the target was a cheater that woman wanting him dead makes sense

[sleepyicon]

blitz was selfish af for not letting millie carry out the job just bc it reminded him of his imaginary family with stolas. it’s fucking sinsmas let her get paid.

[sanjisblackasswife]

(FLUFF/NSFW) Let’s Talk About: Gojo Having a Black Girlfriend/Wife

Fluff

This mf loves black women

Look at him

Ultimate light skin

We all know Gege said he wouldn’t be good in a relationship.

However it’s not because he’s a cheater

Why do people aim him to be a red flag do y’all even know anything about this man’s true character

But to circumstance .

But let’s say he can have a partner.

You are the first and only candidate for this man and if you turn him down he may hit on Geto

I HC Gojo as straight but I still enjoy making jokes about him and Geto being a couple

A lot of women threw themselves at Gojo but you didn’t .

Not to say you were not like other girls oh no

You wanted to sit on his cock too, but you had a standard of yourself

Tbh Gojo as a boyfriend would be like having a little brother.

He annoys

Your entire well being.

Takes your wigs (if you wear em) and plays Megan thee Stallion in the bathroom

Bro is the type to use that audio “I was out nigga’d and I will never be out nigga’d again” when he records himself braiding your hair

He braids amazingly btw

Speaking of TikTok yes he is TT Famous and y’all have an account together

Bro does damn near every couple trend just to show you off.

I’d also like to add Gojo didn’t start off showing you off you actually hid y’all relationship from anybody for about a year

He told you off rip he didn’t want many people to know about you just yet becasue he knew you’d probably be a target. If you didn’t agree to that then it’s curtains for your relationship

But since you were so understanding Gojo actually cherished that.

Hiding the relationship wasn’t that hard. He was a busy man and you were a busy woman so if anybody saw y’all together it was pretty rare.

Lowkey killed him though after a few months because he really wanted to do some PDA.

LOVES PDA

Love love LOVE

Lingering touches, butt slaps, kisses, whatever he loves it.

If you’re not into it he’ll try some self restraint but don’t get mad if he loses his mind when y’all get home

Would love to have kids with you!

“I’d call them my 2 piece and a biscuit.”

“The hell is wrong with you.”

“Little mocha babies…”

“CAN YOU—-“

Loves calling you mama(s) or mommy

If you like it it’s fine but if you don’t it’s worse because then he’ll keep going

Despite his confidence he can be very insecure sometimes

You didn’t even know this man could have such a low view of himself but that was about 2 years into the relationship he finally revealed the real him

Yes two years and that’s if y’all already been friends years prior to going out

He doesn’t open up easy but he learns to trust you

Some days he comes back to exhausted and mentally drained but he keeps a fake smile for you.

But you Seen right through his BS.

You don’t try and push any issues too far but you show with action you’re there. Some days you just grab him and place him on top of you on the couch, take off his blindfold and rub his back and hair

He’s gotten real emotional a few times when you did it, mostly because you’ve done it on days he just needed a hug.

You’re his literal teddy bear because of this.

He’s 6’7” so he towers over you when he slings his body on top of yours. He also throws you around a lot

“PUT ME DOWN MF—AH!”

He’ll pull your shorts down and give you brown booty a nice slap before rubbing it a little

“Shut up we’re taking a nap.”

Gojo really loves how you cook btw

Moreso what you bake

Mans has a sweet tooth out of this world so if you are a baker you’re now his personal chef.

Also don’t think the love you have for him is one sided he definitely shows his love for you too. He may be an ass sometimes but he’s an amazing listener.

His advice is usually what’s helps you best. Granted it’s not always what you wanna hear but Gojo is an exceptional listener and observer so if you ever feel bad it doesn’t go unnoticed by him

Can I also add y’all have so many inside jokes omg

The amount of references y’all can do in a conversation is so amazingly scary

Also once a month or so Gojo looks for a new show for you both to binge, and discuss about

Y’all are currently watching Hunter x Hunter together

“Killua would be an excellent student of mine.”

“He’d hate you.”

Dating him is like dating your best friend.

Gojo really likes to just have dates at home, you both cook together, play some video games , and just joke around

Not to say he won’t take you out he most definitely will though.

“I got you this dress be ready by 9…and don’t wear panties.”

“HELLO—“

Nsfw

Gojo is a pervert…he really is.

You didn’t know how bad it was when he was once really drunk and showed you his photo gallery to show you some memes he saved but accidentally showed the album of lewd photos of you on there.

“Oh! Ooooh! Oh this wasn’t the video…haha.”

A whole video of him recording you getting pounded from the back

“SATO—?!”

“Sorry…you look hot though lookit!”

Panty sniffer

Panty stealer

Takes the panties you wear when you’re on your period to replace them with thongs

“My pad wont fit—“

“It’s okay just wear a towel.”

You hate him sm

He casually makes remarks about sex

Like just randomly on a Thursday morning during breakfast

“Baby tonight when you suck my dick can you also sit on my face? I promise you’re not heavy.”

Like mf we are eating French Toast watching Sponegbob what’s wrong with you.

Speaking of being heavy he likes to pick you up and fuck you on the wall

Like

ALOT

He is most definitely the “Gentle lover but fucks you like a beast” trope

Wont admit it but loves eating your ass

He does very long licks when eating you from the back just to lick you ALLLLL THE WAY.

He has asked if you wanted to get your pussy pierced too.

He seen it in a porno and thought it’d look so hot on you.

“But—“

“No.”

Still asks like once a week

Gojo is a Butt man.

That’s why he loves doggy style with you.

The way your pretty melanin is so shiny and wet jiggling off of Gojo’s pelvis makes him so turned on he sometimes can’t last too long

“Fuck baby I’m cuming!” He whines as he slams behind you harder gripping at your thick hair.

His hand is never not on your butt

Ok one more thing on him being a pervert

He really likes taking pictures of you

Like ALOT

Sometimes you’ll know and other you won’t

Which are his favorite.

He has a few videos of you touching yourself without your knowledge and because of this he has 2 phones, one for when he’s out and that other phone hidden where nobody can steal it.

Really wants to make a sex tape with you

Like so bad

He doesn’t even use porn anymore to jack off he’d rather look at a video of you moaning his name

He’ll never admit it but he wants to be dominated by you so bad skshdhdiek

Why do you think he’s so teasing?

Your attitude is the most attractive thing about you and seeing you possibly snap at him one day and have him crying for more is something he hopes for you to do.

Also wanna know what he gave you for your birthday?

A dildo that was molded into the same shape of his dick

“Here! So then when I’m away you can help yourself!…still not as good as the real thing though eh eh.”

This mf is a menace.

[wingedweasel]

Super Weird Dream

This morning I woke up from a super weird dream. Normally, my weird dreams aren’t all that truly weird. Usually a subconscious reflection of something I said/did/want/saw/heard/whatever just distorted in some odd way. However, this dream was like...i don’t even know. I think it was about how humanity started? 

So, you know how there are beliefs of cosmic entities and Greater Gods and godlike but not quite beings that help personify ideas (Death, Fate, Mother Nature, etc)? Well, apparently there were so many of all of these things that they just ran rampant in the void of the universe. They did whatever they wanted, and had no governing structure. It was all just roaming bands of sometimes allies doing their best not to get eaten or obliterated by another roaming band of sometimes allies. Until one ‘day’ one of them got tired of it all and just started killing everything that got in his/its (it was in the form of a male human, so male pronouns going forward) path to bring all the rest under his control. Those that resisted the newly dubbed Order, he destroyed; those that didn’t oppose Order, 50/50 shot he let them live as long as they fit into his grand Structure. He was a tyrant, and if you didn’t follow his Rules, you didn’t last very long. But Order did bring some kind of cohesion to the beings that remained. There was a hierarchy of sorts where all those that supported or were order-adjacent were at the top and those that opposed Order and his regime were forced to hide or be on the run from his forces. One good thing about this though, was that he killed the bloody oozing dragon/snake/spider...thing...so yeah. That monstrosity doesn’t exist anymore because it got caught in the cull. So many legs...

Anyway, the personification of Chaos got tired of having to hide and run away from Order and having to curb his own nature so he could live, so Chaos stole something that belonged to Order (which had the wonderful effect of protecting him from Order’s wrath and outright killing him). Chaos then went around causing, you know, chaos as was his nature, and tearing apart all that Order had structured. Both sides weren’t really happy with what was happening because Order’s side was ‘losing’ but also those opposed to Order were being targeted again en masse trying to flush Chaos out. Order finally caught up to Chaos and was about to do something drastic, but then Chaos was all, “I have the thing that gives you your power! If you hurt me, I’ll destroy it!”

So stuck on what to do, Order was about to just say F it all and kill Chaos, when the personification of Death/Life (at the same time morphing between the two aspects, Death - a dark skinned woman in a white dress and Life - a pale man in a dark suit) proposed a game. “Let the Thing of Power(tm) decide who wins out of the two of you. I’ll put it on this planet here and whichever can influence it the most, wins.” They then took it from Chaos, breathed on it and said, “Since we don’t want this to take forever, I will have some influence on it too. It will live based on the decisions your has on it influence and it will die once I deem them to have been influenced enough. You both have until it dies to work your influence on it.” Then they released it onto the planet, and poof, humanity was created. 

Both Order and Chaos also gave humanity a ‘gift.’ Order gave it a path that it had to follow - rules for how to live. A method for how to create things, how to govern themselves, how to structure their days and time. 

Chaos gave them the ability to break those rules. Creativity. Freewill. Choice and Options and Variations of all things on the planet and what they create, do, believe.

But Death/Life being the tricky cheaters that they are had one final thing to give: the ability to make more of themselves. They figured that if Order and Chaos were perpetually distracted by trying to win over humanity, the rest of everything would be left alone from their schemes. 

So, yeah. That’s how humanity came to be. 

[ur-favorite-queer-queen]

Betrayal

For Maribat March day 7 theme betrayal 

Master List

Adrien didn't understand. Why would his lady do this to him? Hadn't they loved each other? One moment he was trying to convince her that they were made for each other, then the next she’s taken his ring away. And the cherry on top, no matter how much he begged, she hadn’t even revealed himself to her. 

But that was fine, after all she would eventually see reason, give him back his ring, reveal herself to him, so that they could live happily ever after together. 

Only when the next akuma arrived, she did not show up with his ring. She did not show up at all. Instead she came with new miraculous users, and there was someone wearing HIS RING! 

Maybe it was a mistake, perhaps she was just trying to make him jealous. But no, in the interview done by Aurore, not Alya, she said that they were all permanent. Including this IMPOSTER! How could she do this to him? How could she betray him like this?

If this was the game she wanted to play, then he would play. He just needed to find someone to be his pawn. Then she would see, and she would come begging. 

As he walked into class the next day, he spotted his target. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, sitting in the back of class with Nathaniel. Ever since she switched seats with Lila that’s where she sat. Perhaps he could ask Nath to switch with him. 

Marinette was kind, forgiving, and pretty. The perfect person to make Ladybug jealous. He just needed to get her to go out with him. Which unfortunately was easier said than done. 

Nath refused to switch seats with him, which was totally unreasonable. Marinette took whatever means necessary to avoid him, during school, at the bakery, and when she was hanging out with her friends. He even tried to get to the bakery super early to walk with her to class and tried to walk her home. 

But she either had Nathaniel, Marc, Mireillie, Aurore, and even Kagami at times with her. All of whom got very aggressive whenever he got near. 

That was okay though, he would just try a different approach. So he started leaving roses and gifts at her seat. But that didn’t work either, in fact it looked like she was getting annoyed. Like she had a right to be annoyed. 

How was he supposed to make Ladybug jealous if she didn’t go out with him. Now he was getting annoyed. 

It didn’t help that his father and Natalie were arrested for being Hawkmoth and Mayura. His mother was in their basement in a coma and was thankfully revived. So she started taking care of him. 

That was fine, but what was more annoying was that Ladybug wasn’t seen after that. No one from the team was. And she had never come back with his ring. Never come back to apologize or reveal herself. 

The nerve of her! And what was worse was that Marinette was no longer seen at school. It wasn’t like her to ditch school, so where was she? He tried asking her parents but apparently she had gotten emancipated. 

And none of his friends had any clue where she was. And when he had tried asking her current friends, they refused to tell him! 

It wasn’t until years later, married to someone he didn’t love, a woman who only loved his money, that he had stumbled upon an account. Marinette’s tik tok account. 

He eagerly pressed a video, wanting to see how miserable her life was now since she had left. What he saw made his blood boil. 

There she was with the famous Jason Todd-Wayne, looking happy. Having the nerve to be happy while he was miserable. And apparently she wasn’t even Marinette anymore, she was MARGOT TODD! How dare she move on! How dare she be happy dating some secret girlfriend while he was miserable with his lying, gold-digging wife! It wasn’t fair! IT WASN’T FAIR! IT- 

His thought was cut off by a knock at the door. “It’s me Monsieur Agreste.” The sweet voice of his secretary came from the other side of the door. Just what he needed.

“Come in Ashlynn.” As he made his way to the door, Ashlynn walked in. He immediately closed the door, grabbed her waist, and pulled her into a passionate kiss. He would’ve done more if not for her hands pushing him away. 

“Not today Adrien, Lila just got home.” She spoke, slightly out of breath. 

“I see, shall we continue this later, Ashlynn?” Despite it being a question, there was no other choice in the matter. 

“We shall Monsieur.” She replied, walking out the door to go greet his horrible wife. Some days he wished he could get a divorce, but that wouldn’t look good for his already struggling image. 

-

“Chloe! I’m home!” Marinette shouted to her lovely girlfriend. 

“Pixie, come to the living room! You’re gonna wanna see this!” The voice of Jason Todd came from her living room. 

As she made her way to the living room she was met with Chloe and Jason both grinning like maniacs on the couch in front of the TV. 

“What are you both watching?” Marinette asked, before she registered that Jason was in her home, “Wait, Jason what are you doing here?” 

“Just come watch babe.” Chloe whined, making grabby hands at her girlfriend. 

Marinette went and sat down in Chloe’s lap while Jason rewinded the TV. Marinette was about to ask again what was going on when the news person started speaking. 

“Famous model, owner of Gabriel Agreste, and son of late Gabriel Agreste, Adrien Agreste has been divorced by his wife Lila Agreste, now Lila Rossi after having an affair with his secretary, Ashlynn Leroy. So far he has yet to comment on the affair or divorce, but this isn’t the first time that the young man has come under fire…” 

“Seriously, Lila is actually divorcing him?” Marinette questioned, shocked at this revelation. 

“You’re surprised she’s divorcing his money.” Chloe snickered. 

“Yeah, yeah. But Jay, that doesn’t explain why you’re here?” Marinette went back to her original question. 

“I wanted to see your reaction. And I’m not surprised, apparently this isn’t his first time cheating on her.” Jason answered. 

“What poor soul do you think she’ll try to trap next?” Chloe jokingly asked. 

“Well lets see…” Jason trailed off. 

“I never should’ve let you guys meet.” Marinette muttered, narrowing her eyes at the two of them.

“We were gonna meet one way or another Pixie. She’s your girlfriend and I’m your best friend.” Jason easily replied. 

“You two are gonna be the death of me, you know that?” Marinette complained. Jason was about to reply but then the doorbell rang.

“Oh pizza’s here!” Jason raced up to grab the door. 

“You ordered pizza!” Marinette exclaimed. 

“It’s with my money, don't worry!” Jason yelled back. 

“JASON!” Marinette screamed, while Chloe laughed in the background. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’m not sure how many people saw the post I made earlier today, but I’ll say it here. While I was writing psycho Adrien I ended up scaring myself as I wrote him. I told my sister and she laughed at me, she’s lucky she doesn’t have these writer problems. On another not, I bet you weren’t expecting that plot twist. But honestly as long as Adrien isn’t dating Ladybug I totally see him as a cheater. But that’s just me. 

@maribatmarch-2k21

[criminalminds4days]

Family Matters | Chapter 3: Trivia

Hello People!

I hope you have had an amazing week and are going to have an ever better weekend. I am so done with this week. It was really crappy and I just can't wait for the beginning of next, hoping it will be better. The only positive side is that I was able to get over my writer's block and have finished about 3 new chapters.

Anyway, enjoy this chapter of Family Matters and let me know what you think!

Warnings: Swearing, sexual references, violence and murder references, public embarrassment, and very bad jokes!

Word Count: 3.6k

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Tag list: @mcntsee @lets-be-gay-for-the-angel @evelyncade @haylaansmi @paulaern @myfandomlife-blog

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(This gif is not mine)

Chapter 3: Trivia

She closed the blinds and made sure for the fifth time the door was locked. Her breath caught in her throat and the fear and adrenaline that had rushed through her body made even Spencer Reid nervous.

"What's going on?"

"This is bad, I didn't realize the consequences of this until it was too late. I am so sorry I got you all tangled up in this mess."

"What are you talking about? What happened?"

"I-" She turned and took a peek through the blinds, ensuring there was no one around. "I did not think things through. I think it's best if you go home, that way you might be spared."

"You are seriously starting to make me nervous, please tell me what's going on, how can I help?"

"There is nothing you can do; I am basically a dead woman."

"Why? Who's after you?"

"Anna Hemingway."

"Your cousin is after you? Did she threaten you or something?"

"No, she didn't have to." She walked towards the bed and sat on the edge, still glancing every now and then, making sure the coast was clear.

After her and Spencer's victory, they had both decided to go to bed, and while the rest of her family insisted on having another dinner dedicated to the couple, they had both decided best to eat and head back to their cabin. He had finished first and decided to head back, and as soon as he was gone, the memory hit her making her mistake obvious. And the main reason she had resorted to a passive competition with the world's worst cousin was clear once again. In a hurry she had returned to their cabin, ensuring she was not being followed, and locked the door, startling the doctor.

"The last time I beat Anna at something was when I twelve. We were both auditioning for the same role in our school musical. They gave me the part." He smiled, truly excited for her accomplishment, as well as happy to learn this new fact about her. "Don't get too peppy. On opening night, at Grandma's celebration for the play, I fell down the stairs."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Because, Dr. Spencer Reid, as hard as it is to believe, me falling down the stairs was not due to my immense clumsiness."

"Wait, your cousin pushed you down the stairs?!" He exclaimed, truly horrified. How are children so cute and so evil at the same time?

"More like, she set her foot for me to trip on, but you get the idea." She glanced back at the door and then at the man in front of her. "I was lucky, I didn't break anything, but I have a feeling that might not be the case the next time. I also would prefer not to drown or anything like that."

"But we're federal agents, doing something to you or me would be unwise."

"You're speaking of the girl that tripped me down the stairs and thought that stealing my boyfriend and marrying him was wise."

"I'm gonna double-check the door is locked."

After hours of attempting to stay vigilant, her body had given in and she had fallen asleep. Although Spencer knew the danger, to him it was as simple as closing his eyes. She knew they were trained to deal with a lot of sick people, but he didn't understand the limits his cousin would go to destroy those who she felt wronged by. Although her main target had always been her, she once had basically ended a girl's life by getting her banned from pretty much any respectable college or job position because this one had made fun of her prom dress. Anna Hemingway was one to be cautious with, and they had both just embarrassed her in front of the people whose attention she had snatched years ago. It was worse than she realized.

"Spencer, Spencer." She spoke as she slightly moved him. He growled and moved away from her, attempting to continue his slumber. "Spencer."

"No, let me sleep." He complained.

"Spence, get up, please." After minutes of silence, she devised a new plan. "Spencer!" she screamed, making him jump, falling off the bed and landing between the edge of this first one and the door of the closet. "Oh good, you're awake."

He didn't say a word, for what seemed like centuries, and she wondered if screaming him awake was not the best decision, especially as her next request would not be something he would be inclined to.

"Sorry for that, I just needed you to wake up."

"Is there a fire I don't know about?"

"No, I just thought we could go for a run." There it was, the look Spencer had only given the unsubs he despised the most. She had earned it, but that didn't mean she liked it. "Sorry, I just, Nicole had to leave, and since I have a target on my back and there's safety in numbers... I also didn't want to leave you here alone, and vulnerable. I just felt like, despite your muscles, I am concerned you haven't yet mastered the use of your body."

"I will have you know that by all accounts I definitely know how to use my body. Quite effectively if I do say so myself, and others."

After his words, her mind went to a thought she never imagined having. She wondered if he meant it that way or she was just losing it. "Good, then you can come with me." That sentence following her thoughts was probably not ideal.

"No thank you, you can do it by yourself." She needed to change the direction her thoughts were going; they were definitely not helpful.

"Spencer, please. I am honestly a little terrified, and you should be too."

"Well, I'm not. She isn't worse than any unidentified subject we've dealt with before."

"Oh but she is. She's the worst type of unsub you could think of, but ten times worse."

"What's the worse she could do?"

"Let's not find out."

After whining from him and pleads by her, they both made their way out of the cabin. The shorts he had avoided yesterday were now covering almost nothing as they jogged. This was not a good reminder of their earlier conversation, so she simply focused on something easier: her cousin's imminent revenge. She thought it would come in the form of her accidentally pushing her into the lake, or a repeat of her falling down the stairs. She was even worried this time Spencer would be the victim since he had been the one to embarrass her. Her thoughts were interrupted by deep breaths and a yelp.

"Are you okay?"

"We've been running for hours, how dare you ask me such a question?"

She looked at her watch, "We've been running for exactly three and a half minutes. Actually, we haven't been running, more like jogging."

"How long do you usually do this for?"

"Depends on the day, but from thirty minutes to two hours."

"You need help."

"It won't be as bad, come on."

"You can go on, I am just gonna sit here and have a heart attack real quick."

"How on earth did you pass your physical?"

"I got it waved."

"Cheater."

"If it isn't it the 'it' couple of the weekend!" Suddenly the one having a heart attack was not Spencer, but her. "I didn't know you guys ran together, that's so cute!"

"Yeah, truly the reason I love her," Spencer said, a pinch of sarcasm in his voice.

"How adorable." It's coming, she could feel it. "Anyway, I was thinking, since love seems to be in the air this weekend, why don't we celebrate it by wrapping up the family retreat with a trivia night!"

"What does trivia have to do with love?" She regretted the words as soon as they came out, as Anna looked at her like she might as well be six feet under.

"Silly, the trivia would be about your significant other, of course!"

"Well, that's just-"

"Wonderful, I know!" The blonde smiled, delighted by her idea. "The family has already been briefed and they are all on board, I have started taking in questions and designed the cards, so we'll all meet around the campfire for dinner, and then we'll have trivia night!" She smiled brightly and began to leave, stopping by to appreciate Spencer's figure and palming his behind as she left.

"Did she just-?"

"Yes, yes she did."

"I need a shower."

After both had showered and changed they made their way to grandmas house, alert as to anyone following them. Most of her family had moved on from spying on them, but she knew Anna and Uncle Ernie were not that normal.

"So, what did your grandma do?"

"No one really knows, I mean it had to be good to make her so rich, but by the time my uncle Ernie was born, the eldest, she was already rich enough to sell whatever business she had and become a full-time parent."

"What about your grandpa?"

"He died before I was born."

"Oh."

They sat at the same table he had been at the day before; the chessboard was still in place. She began messing with the pieces, creating the game that always made her win, courtesy of her grandma.

"I didn't know you played."

"I too began at a very young age. I haven't really played since grandma died; she was my game partner. The only one that treated me like I was a human being." She sat down, remembering the hours she spent here when Nicole wasn't around, and everyone pretty much ignored her. "She was the only one that ever consoled me for losing my dad. Losing her was just one more box to check."

"I am sorry for your loss." He placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently, hoping to convey his sympathy.

"Yeah well, by how calm Anna looks right now I guess it won't be long before I join her, so we don't have to worry about that anymore."

He rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips. "So, what should we expect during this trivia night?"

"To lose, that's our safest bet."

"I don't really do losing."

"And all I do is lose, so I will be your guide this time."

The family had made their way inside, their excitement overflowing the room. She couldn't help but wish she could simply run for the hills. She knew the chances of them winning were null, because a) she needed to lose and b) Spencer and her hadn't known each other, really known each other long enough to be able to answer these questions. She wondered if that was the plan all along, that Anna somehow had found out about their lie and was using this as a means to expose it.

"Okay everybody, let's get started." Said, uncle Ernie. He wore the same clothes as their first day here. "Let us start with the competition. Since we have the newlyweds as well as the new couple in the family, I think they should make the honors."

She looked at Spencer and he smiled at her, she leaned closed and whispered. "Remember, to ease the monster, we need to lose, which shouldn't be hard, we're not even a real couple, there is no way we know enough about each other, right?"

He nodded and they both moved to the sofa that was designated as their spot, her uncle who now apparently served as the show host, handed Spencer and Tyler a buzzer, explaining whichever sounded first would get to answer the question. She mentally prepared herself, hoping she could answer enough questions to not raise suspicion but not enough to win the game, what a grand world that would be.

"Ready everybody?" everyone cheered in approval and she prepared herself. "This round is for the guys, once we finish you will pass the buzzer to your partner and at the end, we will have one round where either of you can answer. Now, the first question, what is your partner's Starbucks order?"

Spencer's buzzer went off as Tyler attempted to recall the memory. "It depends on the season. During winter and for as long as she can get it, it will be a Grande Peppermint Hot Chocolate, during the summer it will be no-coffee Double chocolate chip cookie crumble Grande Frappuccino with extra whipped cream, and no straw." She looked at him completely taken aback by his answer, how specific it was, and the fact that he knew she was a seasonal drinks person.

"Yeah, that's it." She spoke.

"Point for team FBI!" Her uncle cheered. "Next question, what is your partner's favorite color?"

His buzzer went off and the doctor spoke again, "Blue."

Ten questions later the scoreboard was 8-2, Spencer's lead, and the two questions he hadn't answered were because he decided that would be enough to lose. She didn't understand how he knew these things, or the fact that she knew what her answer for him would be, but what she did know, was that she had to be really bad in order to allow Anna to take the lead back, what she wasn't sure about anymore, was whether she wanted to let her cousin win.

"Ladies, you're up." Spencer handed her the buzzer and she smiled at him. "First question, how does your partner drink his coffee."

"That's easy. He doesn't drink coffee." She said soon after her buzzer went off. "He drinks sugar with a side of coffee, no creamer. Eighty percent sugar, twenty percent coffee."

"That is so mean to say! But it's true." Spencer agreed.

"How are you a doctor and drink so much sugar?"

"Not that kind of doctor." He clarified to the man.

"I have no idea what that means! Next question, what is the thing your partner is most proud of?"

"His job. Spencer loves helping people and using his knowledge to reunite families, he's the bravest guy I know." She smiled at him and he returned the gesture.

It was no surprise Anna was not content with the results, as the end was a 23-4 in favor of Spencer and her. As soon as the game was finished she knew that she had basically carved her own grave.

"That is not fair, they are not even really dating!" Her cousin screamed, "it's all a lie!"

"What?"

"Yeah, I know your little secret, I overheard you and Nicole talking about how Spencer was not really your boyfriend and how he didn't actually have dyslexia!"

"I-" She didn't know what to say, how had she not seen her? How could she let this happen?

"First of all, I think it is very inconsiderate of you to suggest that my dyslexia is not real. I have fought so hard for such a long time to ensure my condition didn't prevent me from succeeding, going as far as getting a Ph.D. in mathematics, for someone to simply come and question my hard work." Spencer said, seemingly very upset. "Second of all, this woman right here is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I will not sit here and tolerate you calling her a liar. We are in love with each other, and you as her cousin should be happy about it. Yet you seem so upset about her finding someone, it seems to me you're jealous, but what do I know, it's not like I can understand human behavior or anything. Oh, wait." He said, he took her hand and pulled her as close to him as she could. "Just leave my girlfriend alone, you took her sloppy second and married him, so what more can you want from her?"

The room fell silent, everyone eyed Spencer and Anna, trying to grasp what had just happened. "You and I both know you're lying, you two are not a real couple, you are just trying to ruin this weekend for me."

"Really, not a real couple? Then how did we end up destroying you at trivia? You made the questions Anna, I had no idea what was on them, you did. And I am not the one wearing a wedding ring. So my question is, how do you marry someone without knowing their proudest moment, or their Starbucks order?"

"Well, how come no one has ever seen you two kiss? You can learn facts about each other but that doesn't really make you a couple."

"You want to see a kiss? Fine." She turned and pulled Spencer's lips to hers. She let herself enjoy the moment, really enjoy Spencer's kissing skills, not because she wanted to or anything, but rather because that is how she should kiss him, there was no way anyone would have any doubt about them if the kiss looked authentic. Which it did, it also might have felt a little more authentic than it should but now was no the time to dwell on that.

Spencer kissed her back, creating an atmosphere in which her cousin's word didn't matter any longer, in which the humiliation her family had put her through was nothing worth thinking of, and the fact that both of them had such deep knowledge about each other only fueled it, melting her a little in her spot, she felt his teeth on her lower lip applying slight pressure and she couldn't help but wish they were by themselves right then and there.

"We get it! You guys want to take your clothes off, now please stop." Tyler's voice echoed, and the two doctors left each other's lips reluctantly, looking at him. "Now, can we please move on?"

"No! Not until they admit they are not really dating, and all this was a plot to humiliate me!" Anna screamed.

"You know what? I am not going to stand here and tolerate this behavior any longer. Bitchy Anna, you can whine all you want, but that will not change that I am with a man I love, and that loves me. I have let this family make me feel like less for long enough and I am done doing so. You can all go fuck yourselves because I am done with each and every single one of you. You allowed this crazy brat to humiliate me and treat me like I was less for long enough. Let's go home, Spencer." She grabbed him by the hand and exited the house, giving her family the middle finger before she banged the door. She walked to their cabin and gathered her stuff, him following suit. As soon as they were in the car and far enough away, she pulled over and sighed, coming down from her adrenaline rush.

"In the wise words of Penelope Garcia, that was hot," Spencer said.

"What was?"

"Everything." They laughed for a couple of minutes, the scene she had just created replaying in her mind. "I am so proud of you."

"Why? Because I gave my uncle Ernie the middle finger?"

"Because you stood up for yourself."

"Yeah, well even if she was right, I tend to get a little too angry when people call me a liar or get in my way."

"Yeah, I know." He chuckled, "How did it go, oh yes, 'Nu-uh bruh, I know you didn't just interrupt me mid-sentence.' And then you commented how a man who wore sweaters in the middle of July was not going to cut you off."

"I am so sorry about that; I was just so used to being cut off I didn't want it to be a thing at work."

"It's okay, I understand. I began cutting people off because that's what most people did to me when I spoke."

"Well, that's dumb. I love hearing your facts, you have all this knowledge, and you chose to share it, people should be grateful for it."

"Thank you, I appreciate that." He smiled, "Speaking of facts, our chances of getting murdered will increase by the minute if we continue to sit on the side of the road."

"Right, forgot about that!" She turned the car back on. "Let's go home, Spencer." As his apartment complex became clear, she slowed down, making a stop right in front of it. "Thank you for coming with me this weekend, I really appreciate it."

"No problem, that's what friends are for." Before he moved to get out of the car, she planted a quick kiss on his cheek. "What was that for?"

"For being the best fake boyfriend and real friend a girl could ask for." She smiled at him, so grateful for his existence. "I will see you tomorrow morning at 5:45 am sharp. Goodnight Spencer."

"Goodnight. See you tomorrow." He opened the door and walked out, waving to her before he entered his building. She sat there for a couple of minutes, taking in the past weekend. She knew her mother wouldn't let her get away with her actions, but right now that didn't matter, Spencer Reid had told her he was proud of her, he had even used the term hot which in itself was hot because she never even imagined he used that type of vocabulary.

Regardless, she stood up for herself, she let Anna have it, and Spencer was proud of her. It seemed like a win-win. She drove home, a smile on her face.

[takaraphoenix]

Buffy Season 8: Review

It’s bad. It’s just... really... bad. That’s the TL;DR of this review. There was one (1) good thing about this season and that was the return of Oz. So if you’re looking for something that hypes season 8? This is not it. If you are confused, angry or salty about season 8? Hi, yes, me too.

Starting at the beginning. At first, I was really happy that they introduced more characters of color, with Renee and Satsu. And when Renee was then even “promoted” to Xander’s love interest? Nice. The two were even cute.

But no. That was all just the set-up to fridge her. Which, I am so very tired of that trope. And that is what that was. That wasn’t just a slayer dying during a fight. The entire issue of her death focused on her and Xander, building up to their relationship, setting them up for their first date, having her be prominently featured, just to then kill her off and have Xander avenge her.

What made it feel even worse - worse than just the fridging - was that they really had to fridge one of their very few women of color. And, to top it off, spend the entire issue in which she dies having her subjected to racism. Just great. Really, you managed to make an already shitty trope even worse. That’s impressive.

The racism itself too. Dracula. They just decided to make Dracula totally racist now, huh? and it doesn’t get a pass just because Xander points out in the comic that he doesn’t remember Dracula being this racist. Because he wasn’t. This Dracula just throws around slurs left and right in a way that feels more like the writers just really wanted to use slurs. Because the character? He was suave, charming, heck he charmed the straight men and the lesbians too when he was on the show. He was a smooth talker. This Dracula? He just... He was just racist and rude in general. Why.

Moving on from the racism to the next failure in rep. The gays. At this point in time I am simply convinced that Joss Whedon is entirely unfamiliar with the concept of bisexuality.

I know I’ve already made a separate post complaining about this, but it needs mentioning in the review of the season too. Having Buffy hook up with a lesbian twice, but #NoHomo, just a straight girl in her “experimental phase”. That’s just cringey and also offensive. Just... make her... come out as a bisexual? It’s not like the writing in the show hadn’t already set her up with quite the bi vibes.

Instead, the narrative made it sound like the only options would be to be straight or to now suddenly turn “into” a lesbian. Which is also offensive on itself, because - as this very show had proven on screen - lesbians can come out later in life and genuinely, I adore Willow’s arc. For her narrative, it fit to have her come out as a lesbian, the circumstances and her life fit for that. I absolutely agree that it would have been weird for Buffy to have a sudden coming out as a lesbian at that point in her life and after everything, but referring to it as turning into a dyke was just not great.

And lesbian wasn’t the only option. Though, I’m unsure Whedon knows that, considering that 6/6 canon queer characters are homosexual and 4/4 wlw are lesbians. They just keep introducing more lesbians - which, as a lesbian I am always in favor of more lesbians. However, when you have a very small number (2) of queer characters, it figures you can not cover all the sexualities and it’s even fair that even with two, you still choose to have them both be the same sexuality. But... the more you add? The more questionable it becomes that you limit it to one sexuality only.

This arc would have so beautifully set up for Buffy to come out as bi. But no.

And while we’re on the wlw; one of the things I always loved about Buffy was that the lesbians weren’t just there for the male gaze, they weren’t oversexualized. They desired each other, they even had sex. But... in a normal frame work, to a normal amount, meaning equal to how the straights were handled. I always liked that, because especially in early days, lesbians were usually just there to look really hot and have hot sex that straight men could get off to. Well, consider me very unimpressed with the comics, because... man are lesbians sexualized now. Willow gets a hot constantly naked snake goddess girlfriend whom she can only contact by - and I am not making this up - having an orgasm. So we prelude the trip by her having sex with Kennedy, before waking up all nude in snake goddess’ realm and usually having am makeout session or sex with her too while doing whatever business she has with her. So much nakedness, so much oversexualization. Really... disappointing.

Staying on the romance but turning to the other Summers sister, I truly can’t believe they made Xander/Dawn canon. Like, I can not comprehend they decided to make that a canon ship.

Sure, Dawnie’s had a crush on Xander since the literal beginning of Dawn. And that was... cute, honestly. Fifteen year old girls have crushes on cute older guys who are nice to them. Figures. Adorable. But she kind of... grew out of that over the course of the show? Or so it seemed...

And Xander. One of the things I loved about Xander was that Dawn was always a total no go. She was Buffy’s sister, heck, she was kind of every Scoobie’s little sister. He had always had brotherly advise for her. Heck, in this comic he points out that it’s weird since he’s known her since she was little - and yeah it is. It’s not weird when two people were both little together, but when one was sixteen when the other was eleven and one has babysat the other? That’s weird.

Getting infinitely more disturbing by the fact that she... literally... just turned eighteen. If they had put this into a rather later season, or a bigger time skip, had Dawn been A WomanTM for a few years now and Xander had gotten around to separating the idea of kiddo!Dawnie from the woman she has become, but Dawn is only eighteen, she hasn’t become a woman yet. She just turned legal to bang and thus, a switch was flipped in Xander’s mind, putting her on his radar. And just... no. Why.

And even beyond this decision; Dawn spends the first third of this season being slut-shamed in ridiculous ways. Which is also tiresome. I am the last person to defend cheaters, but there’s a difference between “You cheated and are being held accountable for it” and “You cheated so now you are cursed to be a giant, a centaur and then a porcellain doll for weeks at a time, being publicly humiliated and having control over your body taken away from you”. That was... sure a choice.

Moving on to the actual main problem of this season. The plot.

Starting with the incomprehensibly dumb idea of “hey let’s retreat to Tibet, put a huge target on Oz’s new home and get rid of all of our magic. surely that will not come to bite us in the arse when the bad guys find us”. Naturally, it came back to bite them in their collective asses. This was just... No one objected or pointed out how dumb that plan was? Really? No one? Really?

Anyway, let’s talk villains. And work our way up there. The return of Amy and Warren. Once again, I ask why. I’m still salty about the 180° Amy did from sweet Wiccan to wicked bitch after her stint as a rat, but having her now... hook up with Warren, the second biggest misogynist on this show, who is also skinless. She used a spell to keep him alive but she couldn’t... give the spell a color? Anything? Anything to not make him look flayed? Because this was just unnecessarily gross body-horror.

Not to mention the... lack of reaction? Sure, some spoke grumpily against working with Warren. But... this is Warren. The guy who killed Tara when he was trying to kill Buffy. There really should have been more breather-scenes of the Scoobies talking about this, digesting the fact that the guy was still alive and more so when they worked with him.

But nevermind them, because they’re working for Angel. Because Angel’s the villain behind this season. I mean, he was manipulated into that by Twilight, but manipulated means he still chose to do it.

Now let me preface that I might not ship Angel/Buffy, but that really only factors marginally in here, because this plot would be bullshit even if it were my OTP.

We now retcon the creation of the Slayers as not just being something dirty old men did in a cave, it was now all the greater plan of the universe. Which. Might have worked had Slayers been... naturally occuring. And not created by men, forcing this upon a young woman. Sure, what people do can be seen as the greater plan of the universe too if you will, but that seems like a cop-out that absolves bad people of their bad choices and deeds.

Anyway. The universe created Slayers and vampires and the ““balance”“ between them (which is bullshit anyway because 1 Slayer vs thousands of vampires... not balanced at all), including the now supposedly destined romance between Angel and Buffy.

Both get rewarded with super-powers now so they can super-fuck and thus give birth to a new universe. That universe is called Twilight and manifests as a burning, winged, green lion who can talk (because that sure is how I always headcanoned Angel/Buffy’s children to look like /s) and who, through time-travel shenannigans, has been manipulating Angel into his own creation.

The magic pull between them is so strong that it overrides the “Angel just caused the death of over two-hundred Slayers” so Buffy fucks him.

At which point I just... this season was flat-out character assassination of Angel? He was manipulated by the bad guy. Not controlled, manipulated. He caused the death of hundreds. He threw everything he stood for and believed in out the window for the promise of a paradise where he could be with Buffy, when the real Angel has chosen other things, higher goals, over being with Buffy over and over again, because that’s what they do. That is their whole thing, they choose the good of the world over being together. They have always been a “will they/won’t they?” where the answer is they won’t, because they know they are needed elsewhere, by others. But now Angel just... doesn’t care about all that anymore, or heck about his own son and his friends, ready to abandon everything for this.

And then when Twilight is born and consequently abandoned by Buffy, who still prioritizes her friends, family and the world over being with Angel, Angel actually... needs convincing in the abandoning? Because, again, character assassination. Ultimately, Angel gets controlled by Twilight and used to kill Giles and try to kill Buffy.

But thanks to the Deus Ex Machina of Spike dropping in in the final arc, they know how to stop this. He hasn’t been in this season so far, because - truly in line with this season - he was off being the king of a race of alien bugs, traveling in their space-ship.

To stop this all, they go back to Sunnydale, where of course the “heart of the Earth” is located, the seed that contains all magic, and destroy it, and with it all magic. Also, the Master was apparently always just there to guard that seed. He is now back from the dead!

Let me summarize that once more, just for emphasis: The universe wanted Buffy and Angel to fuck so they can give birth to a new universe that personifies as a green, winged, burning lion but before it can destroy our universe, Spike, now king of an alien bug race, delivers the solution to go back to Sunnydale and destroy the seed of all magic that is being guarded by a resurrected Master.

How do you read that with a straight face? How do you pitch that? This is just so incomprehensibly stupid.

We end the comic with Buffy as a waitress, hated by many, Xander and Dawn now have an apartment and are playing house, Willow broke up with Kennedy because she realized she is in love with the snake goddess she will now never get to see again, Giles is dead, Faith somehow inherited everything from Giles and she is also the designated Angel-sitter now.

[rainy-day-gracie]

Old Friends 5

Chapter 5!! Sorry I was busy today and didn’t get a chance to post it

Spencer Reid x Reader

Spencer helps Reader deal with nightmares. 

Chapter 5:

Coffee was an everyday thing for me. But recently it has become a necessity.

The nightmares started after the case in my hometown, and I’ve barely slept since. Not for lack of trying. 

I had my second cup of coffee before noon, and Morgan gave me a face. “Did the pretty girl get laid last night?”

I laughed bitterly. “Far from it I’m afraid.”

“Are you sure? Those bags under your eyes tell a different story.” Morgan continued to pester me all until I sat at my desk. He just chuckled and walked away. 

JJ came by to drop a stack of files on my desk, and she gave me a look too. “Did you get laid last night?” 

I dropped the pen I was holding. “Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“Did you?” JJ persisted. 

“Sorry to disappoint you JJ, but no I didn’t.” I faked a sad face. “Just a late night, that’s all.” Or a couple weeks worth of late nights. 

In the desk next to me, Spencer gave me a look but didn’t say anything. 

Hotch suddenly ran out of his office and knocked on Rossi’s door. They spoke a few words, and turned to look at us. “Everyone, grab your go bag. We’ll brief on the jet. Wheels up in 10.”

---

“Holden Baxley, a friend of mine from the Boston field office called me an hour ago. He couldn’t go into details, but long story short, a suicide bomber that hasn’t been identified walked into Boston PD with a bomb strapped to his chest.”

“Oh god,” JJ breathed. “What happened then?” 

Hotch closed his eyes. “The bomb went off, and half of the Boston police department blew out with it.”

The jet was silent. 

“How many casualties?” Morgan asked. 

“17 and counting, 23 wounded.”

“Do they think it’s a one time explosion?” I could only imagine the kind of panic this would have in the city. 

“No, because a note was left at the press two minutes before the bomber even walked into the station. The note read ‘God’s wrath will be unleashed on all who disrespect the word of the Lord.’”

“Old Testament much?” Rossi looked around the jet. “The fact that the news station is across town from Boston PD makes me think there’s more than one or two unsubs.”

“Guys,” I started. “What if it’s a cult turned terrorist cell?” 

“That is possible, especially if the leader is a psychopath that suffered a loss and blames Boston PD.” Spencer furrowed his eyebrows. “The leader could’ve involved others that feel the same and want revenge against law enforcement. By taking on the persona of the wrath of God, they likely aren’t going to stop until they wreak ultimate havoc on the city in the name of religion.” 

“We have to find them before they strike again. YLN, Reid, go to the explosion site. Prentiss, Morgan, set up in the Boston Field Office. JJ, Rossi and I will interview families of the victims and witnesses of the explosion. Try and work quickly. Something tells me we don’t have a lot of time.” Hotch didn’t miss a beat. “The wrath of God is about to be unleashed upon Boston.” 

---

The entire right side of Boston PD was blown out into the street beside it. Crowds of citizens and TV news channels flooded the streets, barely being kept back by the lines of yellow tape. 

“Spencer, how are we going to respond to the press?” I asked as we pulled up in the SUV. 

“No comment, for now.” 

As soon as we stepped out of the SUV, reporters and citizens alike screamed and shouted questions. 

“Is this the work of terrorists?” “How do we know if we’re safe?” “What do you have to say to the victim’s families?” 

“No comment.” Spencer and I held up our badges and ducked under the yellow tape. 

“The psycho that blew the place up was blown to smithereens as well. We didn’t find any kind of ID on him.” A Boston FBI agent approached us. “Larry Dillman, Boston FBI.” He offered his hand to Spencer and I took it before it got too awkward when Spencer didn’t shake it. 

“I’m SSA Dr. YFN YLN and this is SSA Dr. Spencer Reid. Where was the approximate location of the original blast?” 

Dillman walked us through what was left of the front door. “About right there, when he walked into the main hall. It was noon, so there were more people busying about. That’s partly why the body count is so high.” 

“Do you know if he said anything when he walked in?” Spencer asked. 

“Witnesses have said he just yelled ‘Matthew 10:34’ and boom.” 

“‘Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.’” Spencer recited. 

“He is literally using the Bible as his scapegoat to commit terrorism.” I looked up at Spencer. “We need to get to the station.”

---

After checking out the explosion we hurried back to the station. “Hotch!” I called out. “He’s using God as a scapegoat to terrorize Boston. The massive rage confirms that they aren’t going to stop.”

“Excuse me, Agents,” a woman stood up from her desk. “There’s someone on line 1 wanting to talk to an agent from the BAU.”

Hotch pulled Rossi up to the phone and gestured to Morgan. “Call Garcia to track the call.”

Rossi slowly picked up the phone. “Hello, this is SSA David Rossi with the FBI. To whom am I speaking?”

“Is it too pretentious to say your worst nightmare?” The voice said. Obviously using a voice modulator, classic paranoid narcissist by building himself up to be some almighty being. 

“Are you responsible for the attack on Boston PD?” Rossi asked. “Michael Devons incited massive panic with a small IED.” 

“Boston PD? You mean that building full of liars, cheaters, and sinners?”

“God speaks of forgiveness, but you seem to carry a lot of hatred.” Rossi looked over all of us. “Are your friends listening to this phone call as well?”

The caller was silent for a while. “You may think we see this as a game, but we don’t. God plays no games with the people he creates.” The line goes dead and I release a breath I’ve been holding since he called. 

“Garcia couldn’t track it, probably using a disposable cell phone,” Morgan pointed to the crime scene photos. “These guys are smart, using voice modulators, ensuring their members die for the cause, so why would they call us for no apparent reason?”

“A game...” I mumbled. “You make think we see this as a game...”

“What is it, YLN?” Prentiss asked me. 

    I gasped. “What if they’re testing us? That’s why they called, to see if we could figure out their next target... Fenway Park. Are there any baseball games today?” 

“Slow down, brainy lady,” Morgan said slowly. “What are you thinking?”

“He said, ‘You may think we see this as a game, but we don’t.’ What if he wasn’t talking about the bombings but the baseball games? That’s all about choosing sides and that’s something God forbids. They would see every person in that stadium as a sinner.” I looked Hotch in the eyes. “The next target is Fenway Park, it has to be.” 

Hotch pointed to the head of the field office. “Are there any baseball games at Fenway Park today?”

“Yeah, Sox versus Yankees.”

“We gotta get over there,” Hotch said and we all ran out the doors. “Swat will meet us there.” 

---

“We can’t evacuate the stadium, that would set the bomber off early if they see people leaving,” Hotch explained as we got on our tactical gear. “Search the stadium, most likely they’re under the stands.” 

“What do we do if we find the bomber?” JJ asked. 

“Try to talk them down, if you can’t... shoot straight. Let’s go.” 

The nearly empty corridors of Fenway Park were eerie as I walked by myself. Every now and then I would hear noise from the fans, and the smell of cheap nachos filled the air. 

As I approached concessions, I looked at all the people in line. A young couple giggling at each other, a man probably in his 70s, a pregnant woman pushing a stroller. 

And an isolated young man with a giant overcoat. As soon as he caught sight of me, the guy bolted. 

“FBI! Out of the way!” I yelled. “Stop right there and put your hands up!”

To my surprise, he actually stopped. 

“Put your hands on your head and turn around slowly. Everyone else, clear out of here.”

The man turned around, a smug smile on his face. “Romans 1:18!”

He started to unbuckle his overcoat. 

He didn’t get the chance when I shot him between the eyes. 

I took a shaky breath and called into my comm. “Suspect is down. Get bomb squad in here to take care of the explosive. Fifty feet away from concessions.”

The smile was still frozen on his face, even though half of his head was blown out.

---

I was quiet on the jet ride back. He wasn’t my first kill, but my first one with the BAU, and that was sure to ensue even more sleepless nights. 

Spencer sat across from me. “You were even more impressive than usual with this case. Somehow you always raise the bar.” 

“No kidding,” Rossi said in passing. 

“So are you going to tell me about this nightmare you’re having or...” Spencer gave me a look. “You know talking about it will help.”

“Spencer-“

“Talk to me.” I could see in his eyes he wasn’t going to give up. 

“Well, it starts out with me sitting with a teenage girl. She’s a patient, and she was talking about how her teacher was... messing with her. Slowly she disappears, and the room transforms into... my mom’s bedroom. She’s standing there, yelling at me. Except the louder she yells, the more blood comes out of her mouth.” I shake my head. “I try and help her, but no sound would come out. She wraps her hand around my throat, screaming at me and spitting blood in my face. I wake up before she brings her fist down on my jaw. 

Spencer was quiet for a while. “...Could it be the apartment making the nightmares worse? Sometimes a change of scenery helps distract the subconscious from the nightmares.” Spencer twirled a pen through his fingers, and his eyebrows furrowed. 

“Maybe, whenever I’m lying awake in my bed I’m looking around my bedroom instead of relaxing.”

Spencer thought about something. “Well... you could stay the night at my place if you want. I could sleep on the couch and you can take the bed.” I could see his nervousness in his darting eyes and twitchy hands. 

I smile. “Spencer, that’s really nice but you don’t have to-“

“No, no. I want to help.” And I could tell he was serious. 

“Okay sure, but on one condition- I take the couch and you sleep in your own bed.” 

Spencer huffed a laugh. “Fine.”

---

The plane landed at 10:12 at night. Not super late, but after this case, everyone wanted to go to bed. 

Hotch had made an announcement on the jet that we could take a half day tomorrow and come in at noon. 

“Can’t wait to sleep in until 11:45,” Morgan joked on the elevator.

Since Spencer takes the train to work everyday, he hopped in my passengers seat and immediately made a face. 

“What is it?” I asked, confused. 

“Your car is disgusting,” Spencer said. “I’ve seen shantytowns cleaner than this.”

“Oh, shut up Mr. Cleanliness. A couple food wrappers does not make me a slob,” I lightly punched him in the shoulder as I pulled out of the parking garage. 

“It’s more than a couple,” Spencer muttered. 

“I’ve starting to regret agreeing to a sleepover, pretty boy.” 

---

Sitting on Spencer’s couch eating popcorn and watching Doctor Who felt so much like college that I completely forgot about the fact that I could’ve been blown up today. 

We were still watching Doctor Who on the couch when my eyes fell heavy. Slowly, my head rested on Spencer’s shoulder and started to doze off. 

I was barely awake when I felt Spencer press a light kiss on my forehead. 

His lips felt the same as they did in college. 

[bookdragonlibrary]

Miraculous Ladybug New York

The voices sound normal in French but seem so wrong in English and I don’t know what gives me this impression :/

There are a lot of things I loved in this episode/film:

First I’m glad the comic seems to not be canon anymore since it is Ladybug and Chat noir’s first trip to New York and they never met the US heroes before.

Cosmo Bug and Astrochat! I hope we will have a closer look and a longer utilisation in season 4 because this transformation looks so cool but was too short!

Miss Bustier being pregnant! So was she calling Miss because she is young and not because she is not married yet?

Marinette being to short to unlock the automatic door. 

Marinette in denial with Adrien is just a friend, meaning Adrien was also in denial of his feelings for Marinette this whole time :D 

A Black woman for the President of USA, the creators literally saying fuck the current timeline.

A black and a Native american girls as main US heroes (I mean they have most of the screen time of US heroes + about our heroes age) and a multiracial homoparental family. When Majestia says “it’s time to be our true selves” she isn’t only talking about Knight owl being a woman, but also about the both of them being a couple right? Maybe the Americans know Knight Owl and Majestia are going out but since they don’t know Knight Owl is a woman…

Adrien, aware or not, trying to be close to Marinette and knowing she did everything for him: making him come to NY, making the banderole when he left, etc. What if he changed target from Ladybug to Marinette?

Ladybug smiling fondly at Chat noir’s explanations at the beginning and accepting the flower. 

Aeon stepping in front of Ladybug to save her from the Cataclysm. Imagine how Chat noir would have been devasted if he killed his lady D: 

The Miraculous of the Eagle is the Miraculous of Freedom. Its power is to unlock whatever is holding back someone to reach their true potential, like fear, morality, etc. It’s like a big power up of what you would look like at 100%. Imagine Marinette if she is touched by this! :o no more clumsiness, only her confidence all the time! 

I’m glad the Americans Miraculi are based on American Native culture. Meaning the Miraculous spread across the world are the sources of the local myths, legends and symboles. Ladybug’s box is from Asia. So maybe we will have a European guardian, a Greek one with Miraculous based on the Zodiac signs, as they are based on Greek mythology and constellations’ names. But also boxes based on Celtic and Viking myths! We will have a Shanghai special soon, so maybe the third World Special will be with the European box. I mean with Miraculous World could be film length special about other boxes just like New York and Shanghai are. Maybe they will make more like those, maybe one per continent (the crew talked about Brazil so a South America episode, so we would have an episode in Africa and Oceania! :D)

Adrien transforms in Chat noir just to protect Marinette. He makes his presence known in NY, with the possibility of Ladybug knowing of this, to protect Marinette.

Sabrina finding a life outside Chloé and maybe having a crush in USA :) Plus, it’s an interracial couple :)

Barbara x Olympia, the Supermoms of the ML universe :) So Jesse and Eon are sisters? Since they both called Barbara and Olympia moms? And that they seem together?

The little kitty to make Ladybug know if there’s a problem in Paris. I hope Marinette will make a ladybug version just so Chat noir can know if something is wrong in Paris so he could transform. You know, since they can communicate only if they are both transformed…

Did you notice the irony of Marinette makes Adrien coming in NY and then being mad at Chat noir for being in NY >< The reveal when they’ll realise all the quiproquos from the start xD

Other things I think wasn’t understood by most of the fandom and my opinion:

Mayura making an sentimonster looking like Robustus in Paris to make it seems Hawkmoth was still in Paris. But I don’t understand Hawkmoth’s plan to give a Miraculous to the villain. He never made a stupid move like than, excepting when he made a Miraculous the akumatised object for Queen Wasp.

Yellow roses symbolising friendship is a new symbole, but they do symbolise jealousy in the past. On the Internet, it explains it was to sell more of these roses they changed to meaning. So Ladybug and Chat noir were both right about it. Chat noir is trying to show platonic affection and support to Ladybug

Marinette going back to her antics like in season 1. Well, it’s not easy to move on from someone and Marinette never had closure to help her doing it. By that I mean a clear no from Adrien because she never succeeded to tell him what she felt so of course, she still have a little hope. About her antics, she tried so much to flirt with Adrien or to confess to him since 3 seasons/a year, she doesn’t know how to act as a friend with him, so she panics and here we go. Marinette has anxiety easily. So she has to plan every scenario/the worst scenario to reassure her. But being friend with Adrien is new territory. So Marinette becomes error 404 ^^ I mean, before she would have be thrilled to spend time with Adrien, especially sitting next to him on the plane like she was where they were on the train. But now that’s too overwhelmed for her. 

Adrien wanted to tell Ladybug he’s going away too right away, but Plagg told him not to, because he wants his friend to have free and good time too because Adrien deserves it. Maybe they would have find a solution like the Horse Miraculous or going back to Paris thanks to the astrosuit. 

I think Ladybug say she can’t trust Chat noir anymore out of anger and doesn’t really mean it. We know she cares about Chat noir 

About Chat quitting. It’s not because he came to NY without telling Ladybug, I think the main reason he wanted to quit because he could have actually kill someone. We’re talking about Adrien the cinnamon roll. Do you think about how traumatic it would be to kill someone? By accident, yes, but the consequence is still here and the person would have been an innocent. He would have kill Ladybug if Aeon didn’t intervene and if she wasn’t a gynoid, she would have die for real. Maybe she knew she’ll be fine thanks to the Miracle cure or she just wanted to save a human life. So it’s the combo of nearly kill someone + Ladybug won’t trust him anymore that makes him think he’s not worthy of being a hero anymore.

I read people complained about Ladybug being perfect and awesome. Just wanna remind it’s from Adrien’s point of view, just like Adrien is perfect from Marinette’s one. Not that they’re perfect as people, but the other see them at such for them. When you’re in love you don’t see the person as perfect as a person, but as your partner because they are what you’re looking for in a partner. Adrien likes strong girls, with confidence, who want to fight for others and help them. Marinette likes boys who are gentle, sweet, generous, romantic, calm and relax to counterbalance her ball of energy. That’s why they see Ladybug and Adrien are perfect according to their standards. 

I’m not sure where Adrigami and Lukanette are… The second one seems to be in standby, Luka giving Marinette time to move on from Adrien and I stand that. Maybe the first one is processing thing, Kagami also giving time to Adrien to clear his heart. We didn’t hear Adrien’s clear answer since the finale. Or are they secretly dating because of their strict parents? The kiss seems to be on the cheek (pretty close from the lips from our point of view, but still not on the lips) so I don’t think they are dating yet, so the Adrinette was cheating? I don’t even think Nino and Alya know about them or Adrien knows he’s in love with Marinette or that his behavior makes it appears like such. He wants to spend time with her, to be with her, he’s thankful of her, wants to protect her, but still processing his feelings. Kagami and Adrien never had friends before, least of all a girl/boyfriend. I’m not sure they know what dating supposes to look like. Maybe Kagami confused feeling closed to Adrien because they live the same situation and being in love with him? I love Kagami and Luka but I know Adrigami and Lukanette won’t be endgame anyway so I try to not bring myself to much in those ships… But I hope they will end up with each other! 

Adrien isn’t a cheater. First, we don’t know yet if Adrigami is dating or not. Plus we see Adrinette interactions are romantic because we know they’re endgame and we know Marinette is in love with Adrien. (I’m not even sure Adrien is conscious that his behaviour could be interpreted as romantic.) So it’s just our perception that makes those moments romantic. Otherwise, Adrien did nothing wrong! What did he do? He was happy to be sitted next to a friend so he won’t spend a 12 hours flight alone (not like he can talk to his bodyguard or Mendeleiev...), thanked Marinette for made him come to NY, hugged her, helped her with automatic doors, hided with her because they were sneaking out, share a hot dog and they have been locked in a room. Yes, they danced but it was Alya who asked Jess to turn it into a slow. And dancing with someone else isn’t cheating anyway.

About Alya and Nino… Alya knows Marinette is in denial of her feelings and she might be frustrated because to her point of view, Marinette is giving up without a clear answer from Adrien. She didn’t know Adrien told her he’s in love with a girl (Ladybug, in Pupeteer 2) and from Marinette’s POV it’s Kagami who is also in love of Adrien. That’s why she stepped back in the S3 finale without knowing Adrien might have giving up on Ladybug (because she told him a clear no) and is trying to be closer to her. Alya doesn’t understand why Marinette is giving up on her feelings and from her and Nino’s POV Adrien is also crushing on her but isn’t aware of it and/or doesn’t know it’s reciprocal. From their POV, it’s like Marinette’s one on Adrien and Kagami: they both think Marinette and Adrien are in love wih each other but not aware of it. Alya isn’t giving up on Marinette because she think she is so close to hapiness and reciprocal feelings to give up just now.

New York being romantic… Well maybe it’s Hollywood’s fault and since a lot of French never went to USA, their only views of this country are films and series so their opinion might be biased? (Just like people think Paris is romantic when… it’s maybe not true anymore… It’s not the City of lights from before…) Same for USA being the country of freedom. It’s just become US save the world in every of their movies, against terrorists or aliens or whatever.

About Nino calling Adrien a baby chick, a little cultural explanation is needed here :) Chicks have not the same meaning in French than in English. While in English it refers to girls in a sexual/flirting way, in French it’s a cute pet name you call your child or a cheesy one for your boy/girlfriend. So Nino refers to Adrien as being innocent, like in a naive and oblivious way. 

Too many heroes in NY. It seems Hot Dog Dan and the firelights heroes are recurent NY heroes. But the other ones could live elsewhere and just come to NY because there were a big threat wih Techno Pirate. Since United Heroez are based on Justice League and the Avengers (or other groups of heroes, but I would say mostly the JL), they could have way to communicate and to travel fast across the USA right?

Questions: 

Where are the power of the US superheroes come from? From the bracelets?

Why Jesse and Eon have to supervise the Miraclass? Does Olympia and Barbara know Marinette and Adrien are Ladybug and Chat noir? Nope, they were surprised they are in NY. So why? To be sure they’ll be safe since they are a lot of supervillains in USA? (Since you know, they’re not a one-time villain because of an akuma here)

Was it Aeon’s fault if the door didn’t open for Marinette and Adrien? Or it’s really because Marinette has the size of a child? xD By the way, do the US door retract when they meet an “obstacle” or it was just for the comedy?

Am I the only one who think Aeon look like an Egyptian goddess in her hero form?

Tsurugi-san (forgot Kagami’s mom’s name) should know Gabriel is Hawkmoth, or at least he’s in NY because he is driving in a autopilot car from Tsurugi’s label. There is something going on between her, Gabriel and Audrey (see the end of the episode Feast).

We see Adrien protecting Marinette a lot during attacks. Is this a building or a foreshadowing of him realising he’s in love with Marinette (I mean being conscious of his feelings) because he will see her hurt during a attack? (Marinette could be fine, transforming in Ladybug just before being really hurt or killed by something but Adrien won’t know Ladybug next to him is also Marinette so… angst and tear?) could be Adrinette or Marichat but this scenario could also be a reverse with Ladynoir. Marinette seems to be more and more fond of Chat noir with time passed.

With the special, I think the love square would be changed in S4. Chat noir still cares about Ladybug but he’s not pursuing her anymore. So still banter but not flirting for ladynoir? But Ladybug makes heart eyes when Chat noir gabble about flowers and their symbolism :3 I don’t know if Ladybug will see Chat noir romantically but they may have an even stronger bond after all they have been through! So reverse Adrinette like in the special? So maybe... more Marichat? :D

Well that’s all I thought at the moment. Maybe I’ll add new things when I rewatch it for the x times. If you have language or cultural questions, don’t hesitate! I will add the answer to this post! ;D

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression Ep 9 - Housewives living in Yamagata prefecture referred to prosecutors for insulting Kawasaki Nozomi.

K: Hi, This is Dir en grey's Kaoru, getting started with another episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san,Tasai san, welcome.

J, T: Pleased to be here.

K: Ok, so today's theme, Joe?

J: Yes, lets take a look at this news. 'Insult to Kawasaki Nozomi. "She gives me the creeps". Housewives in Yamagata prefecture referred to prosecutors....

A 39 year old woman from Yamagata and a 45 year old female medical worker from Osaka are being referred to Tokyo area prosecutors by Harajuku police station. According to staff at Harajuku police station, the pair are suspected of exchanging insults like "She gives me the creeps" about Kawasaki on an online public parenting platform between the 8th and 9th of April. They both admit to the charge.'

Just from reading this, being referred to prosecutors for saying 'she gives me the creeps' is a bit..

T: Well, yeh, but if you look in more detail, over three years they actually wrote on this parenting forum stuff like, 'She should miscarry' or ' 'she's creepy', also 'she's insolent', 'lets set fire to her house', *1, quite extreme things.

J: So we don't actually know thier reason for writing this stuff do we?

T: They wanted to send a message to Kawasaki Nozomi's husband's blog, but they were blocked, or unable to do so for some reason, im not sure. This made them angry and they directed thier rage towards his wife.

J: They probably shouldn't target his wife, and getting that upset because they couldn't send a message..I don't really know.

K: Its not very clever, right?

J: Yeah, its really not.

T: Also, 'defamation', I havn't heard this in a while.

J: Yeh, well Kawasaki san probably felt some damage to her honour, and in reality, if they come near her house, its coming close to interference in her business. The police probably thought this kind of 'defamation' was grounds for referrering the case to prosecutors. Another possibility is that  Kawasaki san hired a lawyer, who may have said they same thing....So, this happened on an online forum? I think we talked about this happening with someone else before, but how far can slandering be forgiven? I mean, in this case its being reffered to prosecutors, so, well, when does it become a crime? I think this is a really difficult point. This kind of thing hasn't been made clear in detail, but it may have similar requisites as harassment. But like, how far do you have to go for it to be sexual harassment?, how far to..???*2. This type of thing isn't specified in criminal law. I think this is a problem that will have different interpretations, that will change depending on the information. So, Kaoru, as an artist with your name and face in the public eye, you must get lots of supportive messages. But at the same time, you probably also get some not so supportive messages. How far can you tolerate those? Of course, even one nasty thing can hurt, but what what would you consider worth talking to the police about, for example?

K: Well, I havn't had anything as bad as this, but...???*3 seems creepy to me.

J, T: For sure 

J: And in this case, Kawasaki san hasn't even done anything! She's just in the wrong place. Right from the start its like, 'Why me?!'

K: Yeh, cause she's pregnant isn't she?..with that..its scary isn't it?

J, T: It is.

T: So, Kawasaki san is a former AKB 48 member, and after she quit, she started up her own company and was quite successful, she's been categorized as a winner, there might be people who are jealous of her. But to this extent..?

K: Well, they wrote it thinking that they wouldn't be exposed, didn't they?

T: Do people get exposed?

K, J: They do.

J: But why would they intentionally write this on a public forum? Wouldn't you normally spout your jealousy at a bar or something, after a few drinks?

K: But this is the same as that.

J: They simply write it?

K: I think so.

J: Like a kind of public execution?

K: No, I don't think they are thinking that much about it.

T: I think people need to be more aware of how scary SNS can be.

K: People are writing stuff with no thought, so i also think its ok to ignore it really. Its a person writing wierd stuff off the cuff, its all over...I mean, recently.???? There are tonnes of people writing stuff without thinking. And then people see all these comments just like that...writing just like that, and seeing just like that. Strangely, you need to be able to ...???, and you need to be able to brush it off . You'll still always encounter SNS or online info, thats how I feel about it *4.

J: I see.

T: There have been sucides in Korea, famous people have committed suicide, because they got affected by what people wrote online. So it happens in other countries too.

K: Well, it does affect you, the first time you see it.

J: Well, yes. When I do radio I get called all kinds of names *the others laugh*, recently, ive gotten, '????', to one of my shows. And these people get carried away, right, so it just increases more. They just come out with insult after insult*5, like 'are you still at it?!' ...well, i think, at least they are listening, so im kind of thankful.

K: Yeah, yeah.

J: Like, im just always talking, it could be kinda annoying, so if theres someone out there listening, im grateful. *T laughing*

T: Doesn't it bother you, Joe?

J: Not usually, no. But sometimes they hit in a sensitive spot, right? *K, T laugh*

J: It shouldn't be a big deal ...but....right? Some people will even cry on the train home. Even though it hasn't been a big deal until now, some people will cry about it. Especially if im also having a tough time with work or personal life, it stings.

K: Well, you are only human.

J: Right.

Kami: It happens to me too.

J: Oh, Kami's here.

Kami: Yeah, that happens to me.

T: You're not bothered by that though are you?

J: Yeah, you're a god.

Kami: Well, they say im no big deal, unreliable, or useless or something like that, loads of things are said about me...'you cheater ' and such.

T: *laughs*

J: You cheater?

K: Cheater..? What did he do?

J: Yeah!

K: No, I havn't done anything! I havn't done anything. Maybe its because, they'll give thier shrine donation but I don't do anything in return.

J: Oh, that more like a case of money trasfer fraud in the end?

Kami: Well, yeah.

T: Are you doing well at your part time job   Kami?

Kami: Yeah, im doing well.

J: Are you?

Kami: Yeah, I am, i am.

T: A pseudo account...

K: He's writing on one, right?

Kami: No, if stuff happens to my displeasure, I'll give out bad luck..as a fortune.

K: Did you say, 'I'll give out..' *laughs*

J: Kami, you're scary.

T: He is.

Kami: The people who insult me will go home with bad luck.

J: But there must be people all over the world saying stuff about you..

Kami: Yes, yes, yes.

J: It must be tough to search online for yourself?

Kami: Yes, that is tough.

J: Right?

K: He said once before that he searches for himself online, didn't he?

J: He did..I wonder how many hits you get per day with the god hashtag?

Kami: There are people saying this god is good, or that god is good, or there is only one god, or stuff like that. I don't even know which one they mean.

K: But aren't there many gods, but one in charge, right?

Kami: Who's in charge..im not sure.

*everyone laughs*

J: He doesn't even know?! Maybe you're a cheater because you're not even real?!

Kami: Some people say that about me.

J: Ok, prove to us now that you're real. At least, show us something that you've achieved. If not...if i mention it now, we've never seen you in person since the start, you just came down from the sky, and we just thought you were a god.

K: He just came all of a sudden, right?

J: Right! We've don't even have any proof that you're a god. We've had no choice but to believe you.

Kami: I'll refer it to prosecutors.

J: Eh? What do you mean?

T: Scary!

Kami: As defamation.

*laughing*

J: Oh, if we say stuff about you?

Kami: Yes, yes, its defamation. Bad luck for Joe.

J: Eh? Really? ...by the way, how for would you tolerate people badmouthing you, Kami?

Kami: Badmouthing?

J: Are there any insults where you think, 'This is really awful!'?

Kami: No, the things that are said about me are, im no big deal, that im unreliable, not in existence, or useless. That type of thing..'he's a cheater' and such. 

J: I see.

T: Now that you mention it, thats sometimes said about Tokyo Sports too.

J: Yeahh

T: 'Go under'.

Kami: Yeh, its like Tokyo Sports.

J: Do people really say that to you? But you said before, right? Apart from the date, everthing is false. *everyone laughing*. Thats amazing, you can sell papers and make money like that? Is Tokyo Sports originally just like fake news?

T: Well, people all over the world like a good story don't they?

J: I see. Well, it excells in the field of sports newspapers. Tokyo Sports has tonnes of fans, doesn't it?

T: Yeah

K: Tokyo Sports is like, the different one.

J: Yes, its different.

T: Well, im grateful..

J: Really!

T: On the other hand, we aren't respected. The level of respect we get is really low. *the others laugh* But I want to keep eating, so I'll recommend it.

J: Ah, ok. Are you hiring..at Tokyo Sports?

T: No, not really.

J: You're not?

Kami: A normal newspaper puts articles out, right?

T: Yeah.

Kami: But Tokyo Sports is creative.

J: Ahh, yes. They are stories, right?

Kami: Very much like a god.

J: Tokyo Sports like a god?!

T: Will you come and work for us, Kami?..hourly rate 25% bonus.

J: Ohh, 1250yen!

K: What will you make him do?!

Kami: Hmm, hmmm.

T: He could start with cleaning the toilets.

Kami: A night shift would be more money. *laughs*

J: Kami, how about cleaning Tokyo Sports' toilets?

Kami: It would be an outrageous guy who makes a god clean the toilets.

J: No, that would be the real Toilet God*6.

K: ?!...You were aiming with that!

J: Err, yeh...kinda.

*everyone laughing*

K: It seemed on purpose

J: No, no, it just came to me. I thought it would be too good.

T: You sounded serious.

J:I've been exposed...I took a deep breath before I said it. My shoulders moved.

K: His face looks so camp now....Ok, well, lets finish up here. Err, everyone, please subscribe  to this...show?

J: This channel.

K: Please subscribe to this channel..See you next time.

*1 Im not massively good at Japanese slurs.

*2,3 Couldn't catch these bits.

*4 He spoke so fast it all kind blurred onto one, difficult to understand.

*5 He's running off a list of slurs which his listener sent to him. Im not advanced enough in Japanese slurring to grasp each individual one.

*6 There is a toilet god in Japanese folklore, have a google :)

[notgonnarememberthis]

find your way (back to me) - chapter three

Not quite sure how I feel about this chapter but it is just a bit of a turning point for the next 2 chapters coming so I promise y’all that the next 2 will be better than this. Initially I had a scene going into this but I had to split the chapter when it just got too long and my brain was like “nah”. Ended up working for the better and I’m super excited about the next. Hope y’all are staying safe and enjoy this update

The morning comes with a pit of dread in Gil’s stomach. He was awoken by an early call, dragged out of the restless slumber of accidentally fallen asleep on a stack of case files. There was the body of a man discovered in a park this morning by a jogger. He didn’t match the M.O. at all other than the location of disposal. Still as he pulls up he can feel the tension pulling at him.

Something isn’t right.

He can make out Malcolm’s pacing form as he approaches. He lingers close to Edrisa who’s examining the still form on the bench. The corpse was dressed for the snow that accumulated overnight, eyes closed and arms crossed over the chest.

“Cause of death is a single gunshot wound to the back of the head.” Edrisa states, he assumes they proceeded without him when Colette arrived on the scene. That’s good, the less time they waste the better. He can have Malcolm fill him in on the extra details later.

“That doesn’t make sense. None of this matches the M.O. This screams remorse. Our killer isn’t remorseful, he’s cold and calculated. He’s accounted for every possibility. He targeted my mother in the middle of the day and stole an ambulance. He doesn’t do remorseful.” Malcolm rubs his hands over his eyes and Gil wonders for a moment if he even sat down in the past 12 hours. The boy already looks drawn thin, exhaustion battling with the caffeine in his system.

“I don’t think this is our guy.” Agent Swanson speaks up moving from her spot to the victim. “The only thing that matches up is the location. It was convenient to pawn it off onto a serial killer and get away with the crime.”

“What’s convenient about cops patrolling parks all over the city?”

“Bright.” Gil’s tone is a warning. He doubts it’s by Colette’s choice that he’s here rather than stopping him from doing so anyways. The last thing any of them need is to be at each other’s throats, but he is right. With cop cars patrolling all over the likelihood of getting by without being spotted is small.

It’s clear the scolding only makes him more agitated, Malcolm rocking back on his feet with a frustrated huff. He pulls him aside placing a supportive hand on his shoulder. This is hard on all of them but Malcolm, especially. He’s seen first hand what this killer does to his victims, hell he doesn’t blame the kid for feeling irritated by the slow proceedings. It doesn’t help that Dani lingers behind his every step.

He quietly notes to himself to get something nice for JT and Dani both. With watching Ainsley and Malcolm both they’re going to be on the end of more snide comments and snappings than either of them deserve.

“You don’t have to be here. Go back with Ainsley and work the press. This is not going to get easier.”

“I can’t. You know that.” His eyes fall on the body again. “It doesn’t make sense but I know this is our killer.”

“I believe you.” He offers Malcolm a sad smile. “Go back to the precinct, and gather all the connections you can. Swanson is going to be a hard sell. You gotta make this one believable.”

“I need help.” Gil frowns, understanding settling into him. “I have to go see him.” He immediately defends upon seeing his expression.

“Swanson won’t allow it.” He glances over Malcolm’s shoulder and the woman watching them with narrowed eyes. “It was her condition of you staying on this case, that you stay far away from Martin.”

“If I can shake Dani for 20 minutes.”

“It won’t work Bright. She’s got 3 other cops watching you.” Malcolm nods with a humorless smile. He can practically see the boy unraveling in front of his eyes. Hell, he feels it a bit himself. “I’ll go.”

Concern and panic flashes over Malcolm’s face. “You can’t.” He protests. He’s not visited Martin since Malcolm was taken but he feels the same panicked pull. If he can help them find Jessica in some way, any way he’ll do it.

“I’m the only one that can.” Malcolm tips his head back again, shaking it. Hesitation radiates from him, and he understands why. Part of Malcolm wants to protect anyone he’s close to from Martin. The other half knows that he might be crucial to the case.

“I’ll go back with Dani and Edrisa. There might be something we missed in the previous autopsies that can connect this victim to them.” He turns to walk away but stops himself. “Be careful.” 

Gil pulls him in giving a short hug. “We’ll find her, I promise.” He feels Malcolm hold tighter and his heart breaks a little. He remembers carrying him into his home after he’d fallen asleep on his couch. Just before he passed Malcolm to Jess he gripped onto him a little tighter, refusing to leave his side. When he finally untangled himself from the 12 year old’s grip he took to wrapping himself around Jessica instead. The look on her face had him smiling for a week.

He has to find her, for Malcolm.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jessica’s throat feels raw from screaming when she wakes again. Her head cranes, searching for the sound that woke her. She spies someone lurking in the shadows and she almost relaxes.

“Can I have some water?” She gauges carefully. The shadow stops moving but he doesn’t speak. The radio doesn’t turn on either, so she continues. “What’s your name?”

“Shut up.” Just like she suspected, he sounds young. If she had to guess, he was no older than in his early 20s. “He’ll be back soon.”

“Why did you kill him?” She presses. He freezes again, she waits holding her breath for the answer.

“I was following orders.” Jessica takes a breath trying to quell the panic building in her. She tries to remember all of Malcolm’s talks about killers and the psychology that he often rambled about when he found a topic that particularly interested him. Right now it feels like all of it is escaping her, replaced with a voice screaming to run.

“Where did you take him?” She bites her bottom lip when he turns towards her slowly. The mask obscures all but his eyes and even the darkness of the room prevents her from entirely making out those.

“Where he could be found.” He almost sounds sad. She straightens up leaning forwards. Her head still aches but it’s no longer the piercing pain it was before.

“Who are you?” She asks again. “What do you want from me? Anything, ask for anything and I will get it to you. Money, a plane ticket, I could get you out if you help me.”

“He doesn’t want anything from you.” Her eyebrows furrow.

“What do you want?” He stops again. She thinks he might answer when the sliding of metal cuts them off.

“Why the hell didn’t you pick up?” She recognizes the voice from the radio. Anxiety grips her when she hears another, this one muffled. Her worst fear comes to fruition when the man drops another person into the chair across from her.

This one is older, salt and pepper hair falling in front of his eyes. His mouth is duct taped, one of their kidnappers leans over ripping it off harshly once his wrists are secured. “Please, where is Michael? I just want to know he’s ok.” He begs.

“Shut up!” The older one shouts.

“Where is he, please. I’ll give you anything just tell me where he is. I need to know he’s safe.” The sound of the slap resonates off the walls. She winces in sympathy as tears stream down the man’s face.

“Andrew Rankin,” The older man circles around him. “Father, husband, and cheater.” The man, Andrew, bows his head, his shoulders shaking with his cries.

“You don’t understand.” He sounds strained. “Where is Michael, please, tell me where my grandson is.”

“Jessica, I think you can sympathize with his poor wife. Afterall, isn’t that what you thought your husband was doing for months?” A lump forms in her throat. How the hell did he know that? Those videos were never released to the press. Not even Malcolm knew until just last year.

“We fixed things. Our marriage is stronger than it’s ever been, please.” The man begs.

“What’s your choice? His life or yours?” Andrew’s head snaps to her, panic in his eyes. She knows his fear, the fear of dying not knowing where your loved one is. When the junkyard killer took Malcolm she would’ve burnt the world down to find him. She swallows heavily, turning her head towards the older man.

“Tell him where his grandson is.” She demands.

The laugh booms off the walls sending ice down her spine. “You are in no place to be making demands Ms. Whitly. The sound of a gun cocking makes her straighten.

“Tell him where and I’ll make my choice.” Her voice doesn’t waver, it’s more confident than she feels. She can see the cheshire grin even through the mask. The gunshot is less expected, pain blossoming in her side where she was shot. The shout of pain is drowned out by the younger kidnapper’s protests. Her head spins, adrenaline making her heart race.

“I’m going to ask you one more time, his life or yours.” The gun cocks again.

“Kill me.” She relents. If anything, this man should have the chance to see his grandson again. She allows herself a moment of peace to imagine what a life like that would be like.

A little granddaughter with Ainsley’s blond curls and a grandson with Malcolm’s piercing eyes. The sound of small feet warming her home again, filling up the corners with rapturous laughter rather than the hollow silence of 23 killed.

Another shot breaks her fantasy.

A sob leaves her throat as the man in front of her goes limp. Her side aches with the movement. She can’t hear the two men arguing over the blood roaring in her ears. All she can see is the man in front of her, only wishing to know if his grandson was alive. He died without peace. He died without knowing.

She bows her head crying for yet another family she doesn’t even know. Her side screams with every shake but the tears don’t stop coming. She can’t seem to get enough air in her lungs, each breath shorter than the last. Even when the metal door slams shut again and the room is silent apart from her, they don’t stop.

She cries for the man, who died scared and alone. She cries for his children, losing their father in a violent and abrupt way for no good reason other than he was in the wrong place. She cries for the grandchild, she hopes against everything in her screaming otherwise that he was found and taken to the police. Simply lost in a park, not somewhere taken by these men.

The shaking only gets more violent as she thinks of her own family. Of Ainsley, with her normally perfectly groomed hair frayed and messy from late nights. Of Malcolm’s eyes hollow from lack of sleep. Of Gil, hunched over his desk searching for answers that aren’t there.

It’s not until she has no tears left, her eyes puffy and sore. A grim anger settles over her as she makes her decision. She’s going to get out of here and back to her family. No matter what she has to do.

[oikawas-bae]

OHMYGOD I need a part two for Target with Akaashi!! It’s so beautiful and I need to know please? Like does he confess? Do they start dating? Does Bokuto suspect something!? Does she(?) like him back?! I NEED ANSWERS PLEASE 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Here’s the part 2! Ahah thank you for literally being my #1 hype man/woman/person since I started this blog like a week ago!! I’m really feeling the love :,) also here are answers hehe

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOKUBABEY!!” You whooped when you slapped the front door open. Bokuto came running down the stairs in only boxers with a paranoid look on his face.

“Calm down, we’re not burglars.” Akaashi walked ahead to set the snacks down on his credenza.

“HEY, don’t rule it out. I was watching this documentary the other day-“ You cut him off by grabbing his hand, earning you a surprised yelp from the owl boy.

“You really need to stop watching the videos Kuroo sends you, they all make you act some kind of way and we get to deal with the aftermath.” You frowned for a millisecond before flashing him a toothy grin and looking at Akaashi for reassurance. The latter nodded.

“It’s your birthday Bokuto! We’re doing whatever you like, we brought you snacks right at 12 o’ clock to experience your birthday for as long as it lasts.” Akaashi sighed, bracing himself for the incoming storm of excitement that would explode from Bokuto’s mouth in a minute.

“ALL 24 HOURS? WERE STAYING UP?” Yep, Akaashi was right. “I’ve always wanted my birthday to be longer...how did I not think of this sooner? Ah! What should we do? Good thing I took a nap! I LOVE YOU BOTH SO MUCH.” Pulling you both into an agressive hug, there was a synchronized groan.

“Well (y/n) and I didn’t nap all day so you’re in charge of keeping us awake with all that energy of yours.” The black haired boy grumbled into the hug. Bokuto let go and placed a hand on his hip, “Deal.”

“Speak for yourself, Akaashi. I’ve done countless all nighters.” You boasted, locking elbows with Bokuto and walking toward the kitchen.

“You’re literally a baby. You nap in every car ride where you’re not the driver.” Akaashi followed.

You stuck your tongue out at him and he simply rolled his eyes. Bokuto looked to you then to Akaashi, sighing but shrugging off the mini argument. His owl eyes shrunk in concentration as he tried to figure out what to do for the next 24 hours.

“Okay!” Akaashi and you turned at his call for attention. “I’ve decided that the best plan of action is to start off with the light stuff like watching movies or homework if you guys have any and then we’ll do the intense stuff when we’ve been awake for a couple of hours and feel the sleep kicking in.”

“It’s smart to do more interactive activities when we’re tired but I’m afraid to ask what you mean by ‘intense activities’’” Akaashi mumbled, Bokuto chuckled ominously.

“I have twister! And we’ll make an obstacle course...” He continued to ramble on about the ideas he had and Akaashi and you knew it was going to be a long day.

Hour 5

Bokuto put on a movie for and you pretended to be critics and pointed out all of its flaws. Bokuto and you chortled at how serious Akaashi got about critiquing the movie- he really should’ve majored in film.

Hour 10

The drowsiness began to kick in for you but you refused to show any sign of weakness. Your eyes were peeled and you blinked constantly to keep the dryness from reddening your eyes. Akaashi, being as observant as he was and just looking up to admire you every once in a while, noticed but kept it to himself since he had to admit that it was amusing to watch you battle with pride about being a ‘professional staying awake person’ as you put it.

Hour 13

Twister time! And Bokuto was feral. He pushed you out of your place, making you lose, when his hip was beside your face and he bumped you intentionally (and he lied about doing that when you accused him). Akaashi lost on purpose and went to use the restroom but not before mumbling incoherently about Bokuto being a cheater.

Hour 15

At this point, Akaashi and you were begging Bokuto to do something not so physically demanding so that you could sneak in at least a few minutes of sleep. Your head was on Akaashi’s lap and he was so frazzled by it that he stuttered while lecturing Bokuto about the dangers of driving with zero hours of sleep.

“AHAHA you stuttered, Akaashi!” The owl boy teased and Akaashi’s face heated up, even more so when you nuzzled on his lower thigh to get more comfortable. A wave of relief washed over him as he thanked the forces of nature and whatever was out there that Bokuto was so simple minded, “the sleep deprivation must really be getting to you.”

You shot up at Bokuto’s words, “IM NOT SLEEPY AT ALL. It’s Akaashi, like you said, Boku.” You were not about to even be vaguely assumed to be tired.

“If we can’t go out, let’s do karaoke!”

You and Akaashi looked at each other and breathed in like exhausted parents trying to appease their hyperactive child. And at this point, that’s what you were. Only nine more hours.

Hour 20

“Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. “ Bokuto alternated from you and Akaashi as he watched the two of you nod off every few minutes while he was bringing out his birthday cake from the fridge.”

He served the two of you your pieces and didn’t bother with the candles or the song. You had already sung a dubstep version of ‘Happy Birthday’ and awkwardly inserted Bokuto’s name in during karaoke.

“Eat. Sugar will keep you awake.” Akaashi heeded his friends orders and lifted the form up to his mouth but sleep sounded much more enticing. You and Bokuto both watched Akaashi’s head flip back and his mouth open just a few centimeters wide, his breath coming out slowly.

Chuckling evilly, you took a bite from the cake, “Weak.”

“I honestly thought you would be the one to go down first.” Bokuto said in between mouthfuls. It was really a mystery how this boy could have so much energy with so little sleep.

“Huh? I’m literally a god when it comes to not sleeping.” You slurred. Bokuto grinned, it wasn’t long before the sleepless drunk (y/n) emerged. You were fun when you were fueled by sleep but he could really mess with you when you were in the vulnerable state of almost-sleep.

It only took about half an hour before the two of you headed to the dining room to leave Akaashi alone in the living room to sleep.

“I’ve got a question.” He set his palms down flat on the wood.

“Yes, birthday Bokuto? Ahh I mean birthday boy...oh wait, it still weeerks...it’s even bettturr.” Your words tripped out of your lips and he couldn’t help but stifle a laugh.

“How come you haven’t made a move on Akaashi?” The question came at you like a canon ball. Your cheeks flare up and usually you and the wit to counter Bokuto’s ridiculous remarks but this was sleepy (y/n).

“Huh? Akaashi is lame, he’s literally a sleepyhead...” you denied.

“Cmon, (y/n). I’m dense but I know my best friends and you like him and he like you.” You wanted to smack the smirk off his face but you were just so lethargic.

“Yeah, he’s a cute sleepyhead.” You drew circles on the table with your index finger and Bokuto couldn’t help it compare you to a little girl with a crush. He smiled at the thought while you continued to breathy commentary on Akaashi. “He’s not even just cute, he gorgeous like I had a dream we were married and I woke up soooo happy , I cried. But it’s weird, no?”

Bokuto asked ‘what?’ With a flick of his eyebrows and you sighed and continued to exhaust yourself by talking. “Well, we’ve been friends since forever and it’s weird because he treats me so well and I love this him, I don’t want him to become someone else if we’re together. And don’t assume he likes me.”

“Are you kidding me? He’s love struck on you, he stares at you and he takes you places even though he hates driving. He keeps every dumb selfie you take on his phone. When he talks about you, it’s like he’s lost in his own world. And I get it, you’re really great, (y/n).”

“B-Bokuto...” You breathed out. The drowsiness was out of your mind and the only thoughts flowing through your head were those pertaining to what Bokuto was saying.

“Yeah, (y/n). Akaashi sees you just like I do but for him there’s just something extra there. Like he doesn’t just want to be with you, he wants to take care of you and for you to take care of him.”

“That sounds so-“

“Chummy, I know.” The black-white haired boy chuckled, his head falling on his wrist. “But it’s true and it has been for about...3 years now?”

“Three? HUH?” Your eyes opened wide. 3 years and you didn’t notice? Or maybe you chose not to see it because you were afraid of mistaking it for something it wasn’t.

Bokuto nodded, looking over to the curled up Akaashi on the couch. “You should tell him. If you wait for him, you’ll be waiting for six more years.”

“Maybe I will.” You confidently stood up, chest puffed out before grains of static filled you vision, that was too quick of a movement for someone who hadn’t slept in nearly a day.

“Actually, tell him after you get some rest.” Bokuto shuddered before getting up to help to balance yourself.

“But it’s your birthday...I’m not sleepy...” He lightly shoved you next to Akaashi on the couch and you r head fell to the armrest and almost instantaneously, you fell asleep.

Bokuto stood back and gave a satisfied nod at his sleeping friends. “You two made it farther than I thought you would.”

He looked down a his phone at the sound of a ding from Kuroo.

Kuroohohoh: I’m outside. Birthday dinner is on me!!

“Okay, gotta go!” He snapped a quick photo of the two of you sleeping beside each other before slipping on his shoes and continuing his birthday celebration. Akaashi’s eyes twitched at the sound of the door and he caught a glance of you next to him but he would save his freaking out to after he got his 8 hours.

[angelofthequeers]

Hold Me By Both Hands: Chapter 29

Disclaimer: I don’t own ML.

Chapter 28 | Chapter 30 | AO3 link

“– rinette! Marinette!”

“Hmm?” Marinette is forcibly yanked out of her thoughts by Alya’s snapping fingers in front of her face.

“Finally!” Alya says. “You didn’t hear a word of my rant about Mr Alternative News blogger. Man, wherever you were just now, you gotta take me there too.”

“I wasn’t anywhere. I was just…thinking.” About her date with Chat Noir. But Alya doesn’t need to know that.

“Mhm. If you say so.”

“It looked like you were halfway across the solar system!” Lila says. Why she’s here, Marinette has no clue, but either Rose or Juleka or Alix or Mylène had invited her along to their Saturday hangout at the Louvre, and it’s not like Marinette and Alya can refuse to include her without getting labelled raging bitches.

“I really am fine,” Marinette says. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately.”

“Like your crush on Chat Noir,” Alix teases. Marinette’s cheeks start to boil.

“What? No!” Had someone seen them on their date? No, of course not, the girls already know she’s crushing on Chat Noir.

“That’s so cute!” Rose says.

“If you two get together, tell me!” Mylène says with a mischievous smile. “I want to be sure I win a bet against Ivan, since our Adrienette one was a bust.”

“Mylène! You cheater!” Juleka says. Mylène’s cheeks pinken.

“What?” she says. “I just…have inside information.”

“I hate you all,” Marinette mutters. “And even if I did get together with him – which is not happening –” Lies, but necessary. “– why would I tell anyone? He’s a superhero. I’m a civilian. Hawkmoth would love that.”

“True, true.” Alya raises her hand, like she’s going to clutch at her chest, but then aborts that movement and lowers her hand. Marinette resists the urge to smirk, since she’s not supposed to know that Alya is Rena Rouge and wearing the Miraculous under her shirt.

“You and Chat Noir would make the cutest couple!” Lila coos. “It sucks that I wasn’t here for the Adrienette hype!”

“Does everyone call us that?” Marinette throws her hands in the air. “What are we, fictional characters?”

Before anyone can reply, Rose and Juleka scream. The reason for this becomes apparent when they try to jump away from each other but can’t due to literally being attached at the hip, with Rose’s pink dress melting into Juleka’s black one.

“What the –?” Marinette leaps away from them, immediately scanning her surroundings for any sign of the perpetrator. “Akuma!”

“Where?” Lila immediately leaps behind Alya.

“Alya Césaire!” An orange blur soars off a building and lands in front of Alya. “You think the Ladyblogger can compete with Faux News?”

“Faux – wait, Lars?” Alya’s eyes bulge. “Lars Vos? The Alternative News dipshit?”

The orange man – Faux News – snarls at Alya. He’s…a fox. Or, to be more accurate, a guy in a fox costume, just like Rena Rouge. Unlike Rena Rouge, however, his orange suit is skin-tight, with a white torso and white down his inner upper arms and thighs. He also has short, chunky black gloves and boots, an orange and white bushy tail that looks like it sprouts out of the back of his suit, thick black rings around his grey eyes, and short fox ears poking out of his pale blond hair. Also unlike a Fox superhero is the lack of flute on his back and, instead of a Miraculous around his neck, there’s a little black cravat like a high collar. It’s like someone had tried to create a Fox wielder but left out just enough that it feels…wrong.

“You think you’re the best just because your little blog’s so popular?” Faux News growls.

“Uh, no,” Alya says. “I think I’m the best because unlike you, I actually get my own footage. I don’t jack it from someone else and then whine that it’s shitty quality.”

“At least I don’t harass people for the fun of it!” Faux News says.

“Harass you? How? All I did was leave a comment asking you to shut the fuck up and stop taking jabs at me for actually doing my job! And at least I post the truth!”

“What the heck did you do to Rose and Juleka?” Marinette demands. Oh, how she wishes she could get away to transform, but she’s right next to Alya and Faux News will most definitely notice her trying to slip away.

“I guess they’re just such good soulmates that they’re joined at the hip,” Faux News shrugs.

“You’re twisting reality!” Lila gasps. “Faux News! Alternative News!”

Faux News’ grin is more like a shark’s than a fox’s. “Exactly. Whatever I say is true! And I think that little girls such as yourself should be seen and not heard.”

Lila opens her mouth to say something else…but no sound escapes her. Her eyes widen and she once again tries to speak but again, she can’t. While Faux News is distracted by Lila’s predicament, Marinette grabs Alya by the hand and hightails it the hell out of there before he can remember that they exist.

“Marinette!” Alya tries to yank herself free. “You can’t – I need to –”

“Césaire!” Faux News bellows. Marinette ducks into the first store she encounters.

“Go and hide!” she hisses to Alya. “I’ll go and see if I can find Ladybug and Chat Noir!”

“But what if he gets you?” Alya says, grabbing her upper arms.

“It’s not me he’s after,” Marinette says. “I’ll be fine! Just go and hide!”

Alya bites her lip and her eyes flick down to her own chest for a split second. Then she nods and pushes Marinette away before weaving through the racks of clothes in the direction of the changing rooms. Reassured that her best friend is now able to transform and is therefore safe from Faux News’ hunt for Alya Césaire, Marinette barrels out of the store and down an alleyway to transform.

“Tikki, spots on!”

.

“Chat Noir! Down here!”

At the sound of his name, Chat Noir automatically leaps off the rooftop to the street below. Ladybug’s waving at him from inside a store, and he takes a quick look around before sprinting inside.

“What the hell kind of an akuma is this?” Chat Noir says as Ladybug shuts the door behind him and beckons him further into the store, away from the windows. “Some guy was barking up a tree! Literally! And a woman tried to talk my ear off about how climate change wasn’t real!”

Ladybug snorts. “His name’s Faux News and he can warp reality. He attached R – uh, two girls at the hip because they were “soulmates” and he took another’s voice because “little girls should be seen and not heard”.”

Chat Noir wrinkles his nose. Ick. One of those people.

“It’s my fault.” Rena Rouge emerges from one of the changing rooms. “He’s this Alternative News blogger who I told off for not telling the truth.”

“And for taking cheap shots at you,” Ladybug says.

“Yeah but –”

“Hey. We talked about this when I found you in here, remember? You’re not responsible for his akumatisation. Hawkmoth is. And if he hadn’t been targeting you and your blog, you wouldn’t have attacked him.”

“I still might have,” Rena Rouge says. “If he reckons he’s a “real journalist”, he can’t go around telling lies. I mean, saying that you hate cats? All we need is for one person to grab that lie and blow it up, especially because he had no sources!”

“I don’t think that’s the point right now,” Chat Noir says. “How powerful is Faux News? Can he just take our Miraculouses with his powers by making it the truth?”

Ladybug purses her lips. “I’m not sure. And I’m kind of hesitant about finding out. But we can’t just sit in here forever.”

“He might not be able to just will them to him like that,” Rena Rouge says. “Otherwise, Hawkmoth would’ve made an akuma like that ages ago. Every akuma you’ve faced with control over something has had to brainwash you, but they still didn’t figure out who you were or get you to reveal yourselves. Like Dark Cupid, remember? He totally could’ve made Chat Noir take the ring off. But he didn’t.”

“Hmm,” Ladybug says. “You know…I think you’re on to something. Wait here.” She ducks into the changing room and there’s a bright flash of pink light as she detransforms. Chat Noir and Rena Rouge exchange awkward grins as Ladybug talks to her kwami in a hushed voice, both very much aware that all they’d have to do is slam the door open to see who’s behind the red and black spotted mask, and then Ladybug’s once again transformed and is pulling the stall door open.

“Tikki says that part of the Miraculous magic means that we can’t compel each other to give them up,” Ladybug says. “If we get immobilised or brainwashed into standing still or whatever and they physically take them off us, sure. But an akuma can’t force us to take them off ourselves or to reveal our identities if we’re transformed. The only one of us who could directly affect a Miraculous is Chat Noir with his Cataclysm, but then it’d take my Miraculous Ladybug to fix it. And Tikki says that the Butterfly can akumatise a Miraculous, but it still can’t make that person reveal themselves unless they want to. Hawkmoth’s kwami must have told him all this because Rena Rouge is right: he would’ve made an akuma like this one ages ago if that worked.”

“That also means that you can’t just Lucky Charm Hawkmoth’s Miraculous straight off him,” Rena Rouge says. “Aww, man. But that’s a relief, knowing that Faux News can’t make us give our Miraculouses to him.”

“And we also can’t be exposed through, say, mind-reading akumas,” Ladybug says. “Although there’s nothing stopping a brainwashing akuma from forcing us to physically out ourselves by, you know, outright saying who everyone else is or ordering all Miraculous holders to come to them, which is why I’m so insistent that Chat Noir and I don’t reveal our identities. It would be bad if Hawkmoth learned who Rena Rouge was, yeah, but figuring out me or Chat Noir would be a disaster.”

“My life would be over if Hawkmoth knew who I was.” Chat Noir closes his fingers around his ring, as though this is enough to shield it from Hawkmoth’s greed. “Now that I’ve had this taste of freedom…”

“Well, Hawkmoth won’t figure out who any of us are,” Ladybug says firmly. She rests a hand on his shoulder and squeezes, and soft warmth seems to radiate from her hand through Chat Noir’s suit. “Anyway, come on. We have to stop Faux News!”

To find Faux News, all they have to do is follow the trail of sheer chaos throughout the city, from a group of floating men shouting about defying the laws of gravity, to a child who’s screaming and running away from a life-size, nightmarish teddy bear.

“This is sick,” Ladybug growls once Chat Noir’s torn the bear apart with his claws and Rena Rouge is comforting the little girl. “He can make anything a reality and he does that?”

“I told you he was an arse,” Rena Rouge says. She pats the girl on the head and directs her to hide in the nearest building, then turns to Ladybug and Chat Noir with her arms crossed. “I just didn’t know he was this much of one.”

“Ladybug! Chat Noir! Over here!”

Chat Noir whirls around, raising his staff. The speaker is a middle-aged man who’s got his phone trained on them and a wicked gleam in his eye.

“That’s it!” the man says. “Only the best footage for Faux News!”

“Uh, excuse me?” Rena Rouge says. “Faux – uh, Alternative News is shit. Everyone knows the Ladyblog –”

“Ladyblog? What’s the Ladyblog?” the man says. Rena Rouge’s eyes widen.

“No,” she breathes. She yanks her flute off her back and swipes to extend a little screen out of the end, just like with Chat Noir’s baton. “Are you fucking kidding me? That son of a bitch – all that work –”

“What happened?” Ladybug says. A fuming Rena Rouge thrusts her flute out at them to show her search results for the Ladyblog…which is nothing. Well, there’s technically one result, but when Chat Noir taps it, it brings up an extremely poor-quality webpage with one pixelated, clearly amateur video. In contrast, when Rena Rouge takes her flute back to search for Faux News and shows Ladybug and Chat Noir again, they’re taken to a crisp, professional webpage with scores of posts and videos and comments.

“That – he stole my work!” Rena Rouge’s eyes fill with tears. Thankfully, the man nearby doesn’t hear, or it would be bye-bye Rena Rouge and her secret identity. “All that effort – I’ve put so much work in – and he just – he just spoke a few fancy words and now I’m the amateur knock-off! He even stole my superhero look!”

“Hey.” Ladybug grabs Rena Rouge by the biceps and squeezes gently. “We’ll take care of it, okay? We’ll defeat Faux News and the Ladyblog will go back to normal.”

“What milady said,” Chat Noir agrees. “Like we’re gonna let some ugly Rena knock-off win. Hawkmoth deserves our Miraculouses if we lose to this guy.”

Rena Rouge snorts and wipes her eyes, even though her mask conceals any traces of tears. “Thanks, guys. I just…god, I can’t stand people who steal others’ work.”

“You hear that?” Chat Noir calls at the recording man. “Faux News is going down like the fake he is!”

The man’s jovial smile darkens into a horrific scowl. Before any of them can react, he’s scurrying off down the street and around the corner.

“Well,” Ladybug says. “I can’t say that was the smartest move, but at least now we can find Faux News, assuming that guy’s gone to tattle. Let’s go!”

Faux News does turn out to be in the next street over, with the tattletale man next to him and at least a hundred other people who don’t seem to be affected just yet. Of course, ‘don’t seem to be’ isn’t the same as ‘aren’t’, as they demonstrate moments later by turning around and staring straight at the superheroes like one many-headed, many-limbed being.

“Don’t worry!” Chat Noir puffs himself up. Time to show Faux News who’s boss! “We’ll save you –”

“It’s them! The criminals!” A woman points at Ladybug, Chat Noir, and Rena Rouge. “They’re trying to destroy the mighty Faux News and Hawkmoth!”

“Ah,” Rena Rouge says. “When we figured out that he could bend reality, we should have suspected he’d do this.”

“Go and spread the word, my loyal fans!” Faux News announces, and half of the crowd around him starts to scatter in all directions. “I bestow the gift of gospel upon you all!”

“Gospel?” Chat Noir scoffs. “This guy’s pretty up himself.”

“Uh, yeah,” Rena Rouge says. “It’s not like I just told you that before.”

Ladybug frowns. “He’s making them go and twist reality to make others believe that we’re the bad guys? Does that mean that he can only directly affect his surroundings, and he has to imbue his minions with the power to twist the truth for others?”

“What about the Ladyblog thing, then?” Rena Rouge says.

“With a phone or something connected to the internet, it’d technically be in his surroundings,” Ladybug says slowly. “We have to keep him occupied to limit the damage!”

“That’s something we can definitely do, milady,” Chat Noir grins, then hefts his baton and shakes it to its full length. “Hey, Rena, wanna legally beat the shit out of this guy and not get in any trouble for it?”

“Chat!” Ladybug protests, but even she doesn’t say anything when Rena Rouge’s eyes start to gleam rather terrifyingly.

“For truth and justice!” Rena Rouge bellows and charges at Faux News, flute ready to strike. She’s met with a wall of brainwashed bystanders forming a shield around Faux News, but this doesn’t curb her enthusiasm one bit.

“Hey, that should be our catchphrase!” Chat Noir says. Ladybug rolls her eyes while simultaneously taking out two minions at once with a flick of her yo-yo.

“We are not having a catchphrase, you silly cat!” she says.

“Aww but why not?” Chat Noir throws his staff at a minion creeping up on Ladybug, then deftly dodges one behind him, kicks her to the ground by her back, and rolls under another minion’s outstretched arms to retrieve his weapon.

“There’s too many of them!” Ladybug says. “And Rena’s too angry to focus on a proper Mirage!”

“You no-good fake!” Rena Rouge shrieks in the background, inadvertently confirming Ladybug’s assessment. “Stop hiding behind your little fans and face me like a proper fox!”

“Rena, take a chill pill!” Chat Noir calls. Naturally, he’s ignored. “Okay, uh, maybe it wasn’t a good idea to let her take this one?”

“We should’ve made her sit it out,” Ladybug agrees while elbowing a young man in the solar plexus and dropping him like a sack of bricks. “Too personal. I think I’ll have to…Lucky Charm!” A little red and black candle falls into her hands.

“We’re gonna throw him a party?” Chat Noir says as he ducks to let two minions slam into each other in their haste to grab him.

“No…I can’t see what to use it for…” Ladybug frowns and turns on the spot, while Chat Noir covers her from the advancing minions and Rena Rouge continues to wreak havoc in her attempt to get to Faux News.

“Maybe you can smoke signal for help,” Chat Noir jokes. Ladybug’s eyes widen.

“Of course! I mean, it’s not ideal…I’d prefer not to throw them into a battle with no training…but we need a shield!”

“Rock, paper, scissors to see who goes?” Chat Noir says. Ladybug shakes her head.

“Not necessary. I trust you to pick the right ally. I need to stay here and keep Faux News from getting away and turning all of Paris against us…and keep an eye on Rena Rouge. It wouldn’t be a problem if she wasn’t so angry at this guy.”

Chat Noir winces when Rena Rouge bashes someone across the head with her flute. “Totally with you there, milady. I’ll be back. Try not to miss me too much!”

“Finally, a break from you!” Ladybug calls at him as he bounds away. He flips her off over his shoulder with a cheerful little smirk, then leaps up to a rooftop and turns his sights in the direction of Master Fu’s place.

[writers-advocate]

✰♡Masterlist♡✰

Steve Rogers

♡ Your Turn

✰ Y/N woke up feeling like the world was on her shoulders. She didn’t want to bother her boyfriend but soon enough, he comes looking for her

♡ Happy New Year Doll

✰ Tony’s throwing a New Year’s Eve party and you decide to stick behind the bar tonight. Wherever you go, the Captain follows.

Arthur Morgan

♡ I’ll Love You Forever

✰ The reader confesses their love for Arthur even though everything is falling apart and they’re running out of time.

Diana Prince

♡ Sun

✰ Reader wakes up before Diana for once and admires their beautiful warrior

Peter Quill

♡ Dance Practice

✰ A tip leads to a target. That target leads to dancing. And dancing leads to something sweet

♡ Cheater

✰ Reader and Peter have been friends since they were kids. They’re both definitely sweet on each other but they refuse to confess. Until Peter says something after the reader saves his ass

Bucky Barnes

♡ Love Of My Life

✰ Reader thought Bucky had kissed the woman despite Steve -and pretty much everyone else- coming to his defense, and Bucky swearing on his life that he loves them more than anything

♡ Different

✰ Bucky is known for being pretty grumpy or quiet around the rest of the team but when he’s with you, things are different…

♡ Take A Chance

✰ Goodbyes can be so sudden…

♡ We’re Safe

✰ This is the second part to Take A Chance

♡ Werewolf!Bucky HC’s

Dean Winchester

♡ I Need You

✰ You and Dean have been together for a while, and you have never gotten too hurt in that time. But when it finally happens, you finally get a look that others have.

Jason Todd

♡ For Him

✰ Reader is her own hero who works with Batman and Robin. She manipulates earth and metal, and she’s definitely in love with the current Robin, Jason Todd

♡ For Us

✰ This is the second part to For Him

John Wick

♡ I’ll Do Anything

✰ You’re quite bored. John helps you find something to do. And then your competitiveness takes over…

♡ Restless

✰ John has been acting a little off. He swears he’s fine so you leave it alone, until he comes looking for you to show you what’s going on…

♡ What We Wanted

✰ This is the second part to I’ll Do Anything

♡ Mine

✰ This is part two of Restless

♡ The Little Things Count

✰ Description: Reader had a rough day at work and John does his best to make it better

Johnny Utah

♡ Beach Vacation

✰ You decided to give Johnny a little beach vacation since he’s been stressed about work for a while now

Tommy Shelby

♡ Your Touch

✰ Tommy has one of his nightmares, and you bring him back

If you don’t see a character that you want to request on here or in the tags of my first post, send it to me anyway and I’ll let you know if I can write for who it is ✨

[bigskydreaming]

thatninja replied to your post:

I know I’m usually that guy who’s always...

Gambit is 100% riding on his charm and looks. Plus Rogue could punch a hole through just about anyone that could argue that, which is prolly some kinda factor.

someothermonstra replied to your post:

I know I’m usually that guy who’s always...

isn’t… isn’t that canon?

LOL it actually varies pretty wildly depending on who’s writing him. I mean, good luck finding consistent characterization with any popular comic book character that’s at least three decades old, but all kidding aside, I do love the guy and Gambit in particular is a frequent target of character assassination. There’s even a trope named after him, though I forget its specific name at the moment. 

But its basically the idea that certain male characters who end up more popular with women than male comic book writers expect, or understand - like as in they don’t understand what about them appeals to female readers so much, or misunderstand the basis of that appeal - there’s this weird trend where some of them basically take it out on the character and kinda...do their best to sabotage them? Idk, its like, it frustrates certain dudes who have rigid expectations of what women want in a ‘ladies man’ type character, that when faced with characters who get that reception not because of how these writers WOULD write them, but for reasons they just...can’t put a finger on.....they basically get butthurt about it and are like ‘well what’s so great about this guy anyway.’ 

I mean for sure, being jealous of a comic book character - let alone one you yourself are getting paid to write - is pretty pathetic, buuuuuuut lbr, that describes a lot of dudes in that industry and I mean....there’s a pretty obvious and proven track record of characters like Gambit and Nightwing and the other well known ‘lotharios’ of the Marvel and DC universe regularly getting tanked in various runs and written as vapid airheads or thuggish jerks (not to mention cheaters), in ways that really don’t make any kind of sense from even a basic storytelling perspective and really seem to only exist to make them look bad. 

One writer that always stood out in this regard for me with Dick Grayson was Chuck Dixon, who wrote his Nightwing solo comic for a long time in the 90s, as well as adjacent titles. And to be clear, it was always pretty obvious that Dixon WANTED Dick to be received by readers as a ladies’ man.....but for reasons and ways that Dixon wanted. Like Dixon was a pretty right wing, conservative d-bag at the best of times, (and also the one who made Dick a cop, which tells you all you need to know about what I think about him, lmao)....and so its not hard to guess what he THOUGHT an ultimate man’s man, macho but suave lady-killer James Bond kinda guy SHOULD look and act like, and how female readers were meant to like...swoon at his take on him.

Except....that’s not remotely Dick’s appeal, and why he’s so popular with female fans. If anything, that’s pretty much the exact OPPOSITE of the times he’s most popular with women, and like....you can kinda see throughout the course of Dixon’s Nightwing runs where that just baffles and frustrates the hell out of him....and with him then all of a sudden throwing curveballs into his OWN long-term character work and storylines, just to be kinda like ‘well what do you think of him NOW, huh?’ In particular, I’m thinking of this one infamous stand-alone issue, I think it was an annual or whatever, and it was a flashback issue that was written late in the 90s but meant to take place right before Dick was supposed to get married to Kory back in his Titans days. And it involved Dick going to see Barbara one last time before his wedding, and talking about their romantic history together and hand delivering to her the invitation to his wedding with another woman....and then she’s like wtf....and that somehow led to them sleeping together.....and then him waking up the next morning in bed with Babs and being like, well that was great, I’m off to go marry Kory now!

Seriously. That actually happened. That issue was thankfully considered non-canon by most readers and other writers and never referenced again (outside of occasional references to Dick being a cheater, but as I’ve talked about before, that BS existed long before that story and stems from the crap with Mirage).

But like....it made ZERO sense. In story, in context of the characters, in terms of how Dixon HIMSELF usually wrote both Dick AND Babs, which he’d done a LOT of....like he also wrote Birds of Prey for a long time? With Babs front and center in that? And forget about Dick even for a second, in what universe would SHE sleep with someone who was about to go marry another woman?

Like, it came absolutely out of NOWHERE, and made zero sense whatsoever, and tbh, Dixon didn’t even really try and justify it within the actual narrative, it was kinda a wham bam, well here you go, this happened, DEAL WITH IT. That story’s only purpose really was to make everybody in it look bad, b/c Dixon’s the kind of dudebro to throw a temper tantrum within his own work b/c his female readers don’t like Dick for the reasons HE thinks they should like Ultimate Ladykiller Fantasy Man Dick Grayson, but for reasons that don’t make sense to him and he CAN’T replicate because of that.

Its the same trope with Gambit. And it actually kinda originated with him, even though Dick is a vastly older character, because don’t forget, a good fifty years of Dick’s history was as a preteen and a teenager. He was only growing into that persona of the character with mass romantic/sexual appeal at the time that Gambit was created.....and right from the bat, Gambit’s creation and reception kinda threw writers for a loop.

B/c Gambit, as Claremont initially conceived him, was not SUPPOSED to be sexy. Like, he had really longterm, complicated and convoluted plans for Gambit originally, and how he was connected to Mr. Sinister and other characters, but like....in Claremont’s own words in past interviews, he’s basically said that like....Gambit was supposed to be more obnoxious than charming. Like, he kinda meant for him to be taken as this greasy, weaselly kinda sleazebag who was only ‘charming’ because of something to do with his mutant power, that much referenced but little canonized ‘charm’ ability he’s always been rumored to have in addition to his kinetic energy powers.

Except....between how artists throughout Gambit’s early years actually portrayed him, and the ways Claremont and other early writers wrote him and the things they had him saying all being taken entirely differently than they intended....Gambit was pretty much an instant hit, with female readers in particular....and just like Nightwing in later years to follow, this frustrated the SHIT out of certain writers, because they just DID NOT GET IT.

And so with Gambit, just like with Dick, half the time you have writers who are total fans and just want to show off those characters (and other characters that fit this particular niche archetype) to the best of their abilities, highlight just how competent and skilled and intelligent they are....with fans of course usually being very receptive to this and upholding these particular runs as iconic and fave portrayals, enjoying the characters here for the reasons they’re ‘naturally’ appealing to a lot of fans, etc. 

Which of course, in turn, just kinda frustrates and annoys that Certain Dudebro Writer Type all over again. And thus the next time one of THEM gets their hands on these characters, there’s all these little digs built into the stories and the characters making mistakes that ‘reveal’ them as the kinda insensitive assholes they are, the jerks who don’t deserve the kind of acclaim they get, just like....Those Popular Jocks That Don’t Know How To Treat Women Right, Not like A REAL Nice Guy Like Me Would, and are really just kinda dumb airheads anyway and why do people even like them, ugh.

Anyway. So yeah. That’s definitely a thing that’s stood out for a lot of fans and readers over the years and been noted and talked about pretty extensively, with again, there even being a trope named after Gambit because of it. This weird, self-defeating obsession some guys have with making sure that like ‘Well if women aren’t going to like these Male Power Fantasy Characters for the reasons WE think they should like them, then we’re gonna make sure they just don’t like them at all.’

[prorevenge]

Psycho Ex gets my egoless revenge with a side of heavy-duty karma.

The following story occurred over the course of 13-8 years ago, and I apologize preemptively for the length, because it is a bit involved.

I was in a relationship for 9 years with a girl I met in college. We broke up on the cusp of my 29th birthday. While breakups and divorce are never trauma-free, this one was as close to that as I believe is humanly possible to get, there were no fights and minimal drama, and I moved to a new city to get a fresh start and be nearer my dad/stepmom/half sisters, as I'm close to them and it was nice to have family during this. Get an apartment, start over, everything's good. Then I meet "her."

Things with her seemed good at first. She was the polar opposite of my ex. She's quiet yet nice, had her life relatively together (my first wife was very unfocused and horrible with money), physically a complete contrast, wild in the bedroom--I thought I had hit the jackpot.

Anyhoo, I fall for her hard. We have a whirlwind romance, move in shortly, and we have this glamorous life where we make good money (she was a corporate accountant, I had a decent small business, we're pulling in 150K+ combined), renting a luxury apartment, one car paid and the other brand new, no kids. Things are great, except that we drink too much together and some other underlying issues I'm blind to at the time. We get soused one night and drive to Vegas, and get married on the strip after 6 months of dating and 9 of knowing each other. The ink is barely dry on my divorce papers from version 1.0, but no matter, I'm in love. My family likes her overall. Her family loves me. We adopt cats. We talk about trying to have a kid.

We upgrade our life and take on more debt, just as the housing bubble bursts and the economy tanks, she loses a couple jobs due to her inability to show up on Mondays, and I start losing clients as the ones I have start cutting their advertising budget (my field). Things start to get pinched, and she first starts complaining, then gets petulant, because now we can't spend the way we used to, the quarterly mini-vacations dry up, plus we're cooking at home instead of going out to eat 4x a week. We basically stop having sex a little more than a year into the relationship (didn't realize it then, because I was dumb and love-blind, but she cheated on me during this period).seRealizing what we're up against with our normal bills plus our credit cards, I go out and get a job bartending at a posh resort, the only other real skill I have at the time that's marketable. I get two other part time gigs to help make ends meet. She still complains, and throws me an ultimatum before I even start getting paychecks, laying the blame at my feet. I say fine, screw this then. Had we stuck it out even a few more months, things would have started to turn a financial corner. Instead, she goes full two-faced, mean-spirited bitch on me. The night we first fight, she "attempts suicide" by scratching her wrist with a leatherman, then calls 911, gets admitted to the hospital (I arrive home to cops telling me this), and has the security guard toss me when I show up to see if she's okay because she doesn't want to talk to me. I use the quotes because there was a small collection of firearms nearby I bought for her target shooting hobby which were untouched, so it was obviously just a ploy for attention.

We basically fight for the next week, I give her everything she wants, which includes leaving the house, signing over my new truck to her, and only taking stuff I brought into the relationship, basically enough to fill a small storage space. She's financially pinched so I sell my office furniture for cash and don't even touch the bank account, just take my biz money and one CC I got separate from her. I go to the Bay Area for a few months, financially struggle, don't get the job I was sure was on lock. During this time, I have this revelation one evening--I drink too much and that it's caused a load of problems in my life, so I quit, and I haven't touched a drop since.

Broke and realizing nothing I try is working, I come back to town, live with my dad for a month, find a roommate, then a shit retail job (my business has dropped from 7-8K per month at its height to now around 500/mo), I bike everywhere bc I can't afford a car, and my credit is toast partially due to her love of spending on plastic, so I'm facing bankruptcy. I'm 31, and this is really humbling, but whatever, I'm alive, have dealt with hardship before, this won't last forever. She has kept her house, declared personal BK on her debts, keeps her car, and has been dating a series of men starting a couple weeks after we split. While I never asked the details, apparently she's also reached out to a few of my friends and badmouthed me a bit. This would be mildly annoying, but add in two factors--she's dragging her feet on the divorce due to not having money to file, keeps up contact on the pretense of us needing to talk, but plays emotionally manipulative head games during the whole sequence ("I've realized I still love you, that's why you can make me cry so easily," and other bullshit Hallmark movie lines like this). Also, we live in a suburb that's smaller and tightly knit, so multiple places I go to like my church, the bookstore I frequent, and the coffee shop right by my place, she talks endless shit to people. Says I was a cheater and physically/emotionally abusive (complete crap, but whatever), I'm stalking her, I supposedly stole tens of thousands of dollars from her, the whole nine. Some people actually believe her, I even get threatened by a wannabe biker one night that's literally twice my age with violence, itself a funny story but not the point.

Finally, after some more bullshit and back and forth, she leaves town (more falsehoods around this, including her borrowing a bit of money she didn't end up paying back, and sticking me with a massive overage on our cell bill right before we split the account). My dumb, trusting heart hurts but I'm mostly relieved to see the last of her, realizing she's only nice to me when she wants something. She goes to NY to shack up with another guy, gets pregnant 15 minutes later. Finally sends me divorce paperwork. I sign it and send back quickly, all notarized docs, everything organized and flagged. She attempts to be "friends" and I want no part of this BS. I'm businesslike, she gets upset. She screws up filing, blames me. I say "whatever," straighten out the court issues. One week after the divorce is finalized, the kid is born. No word from her after that for two years, thank god. I get a new career, start advancing in it, and start dating a new woman that I'm still with 10 years later. Weirdly enough, they knew each other, and she didn't like her, partially because one of my ex's infidelity partners was her ex-husband, during a time they were exploring patching things up for the kids' sake (though there were multiple reasons for her distrust, apparently she always gave my wife an icky intuitive feeling).

So flash forward two years. I get a call from my current squeeze. She's just talked to a friend who was also a very brief roomie of "her" after our split. She's breaking up with the baby daddy. There's a custody fight. He's saying he doesn't know if it's his. Will I help her? Well, it's the right thing to do, so even though I don't trust or particularly like her, I say yes. I get the call, and a sob story. Most of it doesn't add up--he took the kid, but thinks it's actually mine, to prove paternity I'd need to come to NY and take a paternity test at one of their facilities, also he hit her, put a GPS tracker on her car, brother is a Russian mobster who threatened her, all very far-fetched. Needless to say, even without this fanciful tale, I generally assume if this woman is talking, it's a lie, so I'm suspicious. Her lawyer calls me, and seems like a clueless shmuck. I get a letter from him, very unprofessional and not even on a letterhead (every other legal doc I've seen has "from the law offices of blah blah" on it, but this is literally just off a laser printer), and says, verbatim "I, M___ K___, am the ex-husband of J___ K___, and was married to her from 6/07-8/09. I have no legal interest in the child." Super shady.

Not wanting to end up in a situation where I've allowed myself to be legally fucked over, I make my own lawyer consultation appointment. Before I can even go, the baby daddy finds me on Facebook and sends me a message. Between calls with him, his lawyer, and the impartial lawyer NY state appoints for the child's welfare, I get a very different story. He knows it's his, he had a paternity test done on the sly at birth because she had been promiscuous before they got together, and she was pregnant so quickly he was concerned. They broke up because she was drinking too much, he busted her with a bottle of vodka as she was driving with the kid in the car. She stood up in court, claimed I was actually the father, and she had no idea where to find me (he found me in 10 seconds online, I'm a tech guy with massive social media presence, a tech blog, multiple writing credits on publications, my frigging name as a domain, plus I've had the same cell phone number for 14 years). Also the other BS was just that, he's an IT guy for a university and his brother works for a carpet cleaning chain, plus just like in our relationship, he never hit or stalked her, etc.

So she, not knowing what I know, starts sending me text messages. I say "Filled out and on its way back to your lawyer," and toss it in the trash. I'm so tempted to send her some poetic message about how the truth is coming back to haunt her, but I resist, because I'm not doing this for her, but rather for the sake of their son and his father, so let's keep my ego out of it. I provide legal statements to all in the court. Tell them I know it's not possibly mine because I hadn't been with her since April 15 of '08, kid's birthday is in Sept of '09 (I remember the date because, due to taxes, I got fucked twice that day). Explain when she was in NY, which is the likely dates of conception, prove I was thousands of miles away on the west coast. Tell them to look through her social media, where she meticulously tagged herself and took tons of pictures of even their mundane locations. Provide a blood sample to a local lab. Tell them salacious details about her drinking and occasional drug use, including her abused prescriptions and a previous hospitalization where she was held for psych eval due to taking way too many pills.

Court comes, and she gets blindsided. Stack of depositions and a collection of statements from me were what sealed the deal, apparently, and the incredibly stupid game she was running is fully exposed. Gets no custody, no support, supervised visitation once a week. I run into her ex-roomie, upset, but instead of giving her attitude, I just calmly tell her the scam J__ was running, then let her "pull out of me" the truth about our split. She's flabbergasted, but also a horrible gossip, so it gets around town like wildfire. People I barely know, including the aforementioned biker, all come up to me and apologize for misjudging me. I'm years past the stage of having any morbid curiosity to check her social media, but every few months she pops up as a "suggested friend," and I notice bemusedly the number of mutual friends plummets from triple digits to eventually 3. Baby's father sends me a massive Amex gift card for Christmas, as much as I make in a week at the time. I call and tell him I don't know if I can accept it, I don't want him or anyone to think I did this for a reward. He virtually begs, saying "you helped save my family. This is nothing in comparison. Thank you." We break down crying on the phone, and eventually form an odd, distant friendship based on mutual respect for each other. I even had dinner with him a couple times when I had to go to NY for biz over the years, and I always buy, because the poor guy has done enough and gone through enough having to coparent with this train wreck.

To this day, she's apparently struggling to stay sober (alcohol and other substances), and has minimal involvement in her child's life due to her inability to show up when expected. Baby daddy tells me she's been in legal trouble, financial issues up the ass, and a string of boyfriends that never last more than a few months. I'm doing well, got married again three years ago, raised step-children, am reasonably financially successful, and rather like my life. Granted, a large part of this story is just karma in action, but I feel like I did the right thing, wasn't petty, and what I did do hit her where it hurts.

TL;DR: Ex-wife fucks my life, destroys me financially, tries to trash my reputation, then tries to use me as a scheme in her custody battle years later. I talk to the court directly, work with the baby daddy's lawyers, and get her exposed for the psycho, lying wench she is. She loses custody, struggles, and the good people live mostly happily ever after.

(source) (story by heymomo7)

[aidanchaser]

Harry Potter and the  Half-Blood Prince: Everyone Lives AU

Table of Contents beta’d by @ageofzero, @magic713m, @ccboomer, @somebodyswatson, and Aubs

Chapter Eleven Hermione’s Helping Hand

Hermione Granger was easily stressed, and this year’s lessons were exacerbating that particular flaw of hers. Each day felt as if she was cramming weeks of content into her head, and the subject matter itself was more complex than she was used to. Transfiguration theory was growing far more challenging than her Arithmancy classes, which were already complex enough. Nonverbal spells were expected in all lessons, which while challenging, was not as frustrating as Harry’s new-found success in Potions.

Hermione believed in concrete, factual, evidence-based research. It was why Divination had been such a struggle for her. Divination created patterns where there were none and broke rules it created itself. It was why Hermione loved Arithmancy, because all theories were observable and provable. Potions was supposed to be more like Arithmancy. She followed the instructions, she learned about ingredients, their properties, and how those properties interacted with each other. To find that this Half-Blood Prince, and by extension Harry, suddenly knew more than she could learn from her textbook did not make sense to her. This was why Harry’s success bothered her. It had nothing to do with jealousy nor frustration that her usual position as top of the class was crumbling beneath her.

At least, despite her struggles to keep up with Harry in Potions, Slughorn had easily picked her out as one of his best students. It felt nice to be recognized for her hard work in Potions, for a change. The tradeoff was that Defense Against the Dark Arts was more challenging than ever, but Hermione was slowly getting a grasp of nonverbal spells, and a lot of her success was a result of Harry’s teaching. It was surprising to see Harry struggle in Defense, a subject he was usually at the top of. Hermione was certain that it had less to do with a nonverbal spell-block and more to do with a Snape-block.

Snape wasn’t the only professor they were having issues with. Hagrid was no longer speaking with Harry, Ron, and Hermione. At least, he pretended not to hear their greetings at mealtimes. None of them had yet gathered up the courage to tell Hagrid they hadn’t had an interest in taking Care of Magical Creatures at the N.E.W.T. level, and it had clearly upset Hagrid.

“We’ve got to go and explain,” she said at breakfast that Saturday morning.

Ron made a noise of protest around his orange juice. He swallowed and said, “We’ve got Quidditch tryouts this morning. And we’re supposed to be practicing that Aguamenti Charm from Flitwick! Anyway, explain what? How are we going to tell him we hated his stupid subject?”

It was Hermione’s turn to whine in protest. “We didn’t hate it!”

“Speak for yourself, I haven’t forgotten the skrewts. And I’m telling you now, we’ve had a narrow escape. You didn’t hear him going on about his gormless brother at the Welcome Feast — we’d have been teaching Grawp how to tie his shoelaces if we’d stayed.”

“I hate not talking to Hagrid,” said Hermione, looking upset.

Harry, eyes focused on his plate and studiously ignoring Ron and Hermione, managed to interject with, “We’ll go down after Quidditch.” He put his fork down and ran his hands through his hair suddenly. “But trials might take all morning, the number of people who have applied. I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden.”

Hermione, though she could tell how nervous he was, rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on, Harry. It’s not Quidditch that’s popular — it’s you! You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable.” She glared briefly at Ron as he choked on a foolishly large bite of his kipper. “Everyone knows you’ve been telling the truth now, don’t they? The whole Wizarding World has had to admit you were right about Voldemort being back and now that they’re calling you ‘The Chosen One’ — well, come on, can’t you see why people are fascinated by you? And you’ve been through all that persecution from the Ministry when they were trying to make out you were unstable and a liar. You can still see the marks on the back of your hand where that evil woman made you write with your own blood, but you stuck to your story anyway —”

“You can still see where those brains got a hold of me in the Ministry, look,” Ron interrupted.

“And it doesn’t hurt,” Hermione pressed on, “that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer either.”

“I’m tall,” Ron said.

Before Hermione could remind Ron that it was Harry who needed cheering just now, the post arrived. Two square brown packages thudded to the table in front of Ron and Harry while a rolled up copy of the Daily Prophet arrived for Hermione.

As she unrolled her paper, she saw Ron peel back the brown paper to reveal, Advanced Potion-Making.

“Oh good!” said Hermione. “Now you can give that graffitied copy back.”

Harry laughed. “Are you mad? I’m keeping it! Look, I’ve thought it out.” He pulled the wretched and abused cheater’s guide to Potions out of his bag and tapped the cover of his book with a muttered spell. The cover fell off neatly, and Hermione strangled a gasp. Then he did the exact same thing to his new book. He swapped the covers, said a quick, “Reparo!” and had two books sitting neatly in front of them, undamaged. One with a pristine cover, straight from Flourish and Blotts, but with insides scribbled on and marred with ink, and the other looking worn and battered, but with freshly printed insides.

“I’ll give Slughorn back the new one,” Harry said, tossing both books into his bag. “Now he’s got a brand new copy to lend to students, and I can keep this old thing.”

Hermione wished that she had power as a prefect to take the book away, but short of telling Slughorn — which she would never do — she could not stop Harry. With as much distaste on her face as she could muster, she disappeared behind the Daily Prophet.

“Anyone we know dead?” Ron asked, as if he were asking her to pass the pitcher.

Hermione hastily scanned the front page. Only one name jumped out at her. “No — but there have been more dementor attacks. And an arrest.”

“Excellent,” said Harry. “Who?”

“Stan Shunpike.”

“What?”

Hermione read the article to them. “‘Stanley Shunpike, conductor on the popular Wizarding conveyance the Knight Bus, has been arrested on suspicion of Death Eater activity. Mr Shunpike, 21, was taken into custody late last night after a raid on his Clapham home.”

“Stan Shunpike, a Death Eater?” Harry’s voice was still full of disbelief. “No way!”

“He might have been put under the Imperius Curse,” Ron suggested. “You can never tell.”

“It doesn’t look like it,” Hermione said, though she wished she could deliver Harry better news. “It says here he was arrested after he was overheard talking about the Death Eaters’ secret plans in a pub. If he was under the Imperius Curse, he’d hardly stand around gossiping about their plans, would he?”

“It sounds like he was trying to make out he knew more than he did,” said Ron.

“I dunno what they’re playing at,” Harry said, his disbelief taking on a darker tone, “taking Stan seriously.”

Hermione chewed on her lower lip. “They probably want to look as though they’re doing something. People are terrified. You know the Patils’ parents want them to go home? And Eloise Midgen has already been withdrawn. Her father picked her up last night.”

“What!” Ron gaped at her. “But Hogwarts is safer than their homes, bound to be! We’ve got Aurors, and all those extra protective spells — and we’ve got Dumbledore.”

Hermione, though she largely agreed with Ron, glanced at the staff table and Dumbledore’s empty chair. “I don’t think we’ve got him all the time. Haven’t you noticed? His seat’s been empty as often as Hagrid’s this past week. I think he’s left the school to do something with the Order. I mean… it’s all looking serious, isn’t it?”

Harry and Ron looked down at their plates, and Hermione wished she’d chosen different words. Of course to them it had been serious for much longer, hadn’t it? Their parents were in the Order. She may have spent a summer at Grimmauld Place and a summer with Ron, but she didn’t spend her year worrying that Death Eaters would attack her parents in the middle of the night or while they were out shopping. Caught in a Muggle attack, perhaps, but not targeted. It would be nothing like what happened to Mr Weasley last Christmas or to Mr and Mrs Potter last summer. Or to Hannah Abbot, who had just been pulled out of Herbology because her mother had been found dead.

Their meal was quiet after that. Hermione decided to abandon her homework and support Ron and Harry at Quidditch tryouts that morning. She felt it was important to stay with them, even if she would end up sitting in the stands alone.

On their walk through the light rain, they passed Lavender Brown, who paused her conversation with Parvati to give Ron a wide smile and a wave. The dour mood of breakfast hardened into sharp relief and Hermione glared at the stadium ahead of them in lieu of glaring at Ron’s foolhardy strut or Lavender’s overly giddy smile. When they reached the Quidditch Pitch, she left the boys for the stands without comment.

Hermione did not count the number of applicants on the pitch, but it seemed to her that at least half of Gryffindor had turned up, and even a handful of non-Gryffindors. At least this year the Slytherins hadn’t turned up to heckle the players.

Harry quickly whittled through the hopefuls by giving them a basic flying test. First years, a few Hufflepuffs, a pair of Ravenclaws, a group of giggling girls comprised of all three houses, and a handful of incompetent fliers were sent from the pitch without getting their feet up off the ground.

The stands, which had been occupied by just Hermione, the Patil twins, Lavender, Sophie and Sally, and a few seventh years who might have been friends with Katie Bell, quickly filled with the removed competition. The giggling of girls each time Harry blew his whistle never ceased.

Those who had been deemed flight-capable stood on the edge of the pitch, just below Hermione’s bench. She could hear each of their hopeful comments and a few gushing comments about Harry’s brilliantly green eyes. She had her own opinions about who was right for Harry, but she at least trusted that Harry had the sense to know who was wrong for him.

She also overheard Cormac McLaggan make several comments about Ginny as she flew in the first group of Chasers that made Hermione’s ears red. They were mostly connected to how she rode her broom, and other things she might ride. He wasn’t terribly kind about Ron, either, nor the Weasley’s reputation for sympathizing with Muggles and struggling with money. Hermione thought that if Harry was sitting beside her, he would have hexed the mouth off of McLaggan.

It took Harry nearly two hours, but he managed to work his way through the group of players with relative efficiency. He took them in groups: first the Chasers, from which he selected Katie Bell, Demelza Robins, and Ginny Weasley; next the Beaters, which he narrowed down to Jimmy Peakes and Ritchie Coote; and finally, the Keepers.

Hermione wished Harry had done the Keepers first, but instead the stands had filled with not only the dismissed applicants but also plenty of other students who had found that they had nothing better to do after a late Saturday breakfast than heckle the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

To make matters worse, while each of the other applicants saved perhaps two goals out of the five chances they were given, Cormac McLaggen was on track for a perfect record. Ginny, Demelza, and Katie lobbed Quaffles at the hoops and McLaggen blocked the first, the second, the third —

When he saved the fourth, Hermione decided to lend Ron and Harry a hand. For the sake of her friends and for the sake of the Gryffindor Quidditch team she was not about to let someone like McLaggen through the tryouts. The trouble was that she wasn’t great at silent spellcasting, not yet. Perhaps it wouldn’t even work. But she was at least going to try. She put her hand on her wand, aimed as subtly as possible, and concentrated.

McLaggen shot off in the opposite direction of the Quaffle.

Hermione let out a sigh of relief and tried not to look like she was cheering too hard as she clapped along with the crowd who laughed and booed in equal measure. She leaned forward as Ron took his turn. He looked so pale and unsteady on his feet, she was about to call out some encouragement to him, all coldness forgiven, when Lavender Brown, in an overly-cheerful voice and a dramatic wave shouted, “Good luck!”

Hermione buried her face in her hands.

She lifted her head just in time to catch Ron saving the first goal. She was on the edge of her seat for each one, praying, hoping, desperately for Ron to save all five. She knew Ron would be utterly miserable all year if he did not make Keeper, but more than that she wanted Ron to succeed. She may not have understood Quidditch or appreciated it the way Harry and Ron did, but she knew it was important to them, and she wanted them to be able to enjoy it, especially since last year had gone so dismally.

When Ron saved the fifth goal, Hermione was so relieved she rushed onto the Quidditch pitch.

“You did brilliantly, Ron!” she shouted.

She reached a very proud Ron, just as Harry, after a brief confrontation with McLaggen, was confirming with all of the team that their first practice would be the following Thursday. Then, as Harry had promised, the three of them headed down to Hagrid’s.

While they walked, Ron had a bounce in his step, and seemed, somehow, taller than usual.

“I thought I was going to miss that fourth penalty,” Ron said. “Tricky shot from Demelza, did you see, had a bit of a spin on it.”

Hermione could not help but grin with him. “Yes, yes, you were magnificent.”

“I was better than that McLaggen anyway. Did you see him lumbering off in the wrong direction on his fifth? Looked like he’d been Confunded.”

Hermione tried to maintain her smile, but her cheeks grew very warm. She let Ron carry on about each of his saves, just as he had after his successful Quidditch match at the end of last year. She’d known what she was getting into when she’d helped him get on the team.

Ron was still describing his fifth save when Hagrid’s boarhound, Fang, let out a loud bark that carried across the grounds and bounded over to them. His enormous paws nearly knocked Ron to the ground, and Hermione had to use her scarf to wipe his slobber from her cheeks.

“Oi!” shouted Hagrid, coming around from the back of the hut. He wore a flower-print apron over his rugged groundskeeper robes and his thick, dark beard was full of stray leaves. “Yeh mangy mutt — oh. It’s you lot.”

Hagrid took in the sight of the three students approaching his garden, then strode into his cottage without a word. He let the echo of his door slamming shut speak for him.

“Oh dear,” Hermione said. She knew Hagrid was upset with them, but she had hoped he’d at least hear them out.

“Don’t worry about it,” said Harry. “If I can talk Sirius round from one of his tantrums, I’m sure I can manage Hagrid.”

He strode up to the door and knocked as hard as he could. “Hagrid! Open up. We want to talk to you!”

Hagrid did not answer, not even as Fang barked.

“If you don’t open the door, we’ll blast it open!”

“Harry!” Hermione said, shocked to see him actually pull out his wand. “You can’t possibly —”

“Yeah, I can! Stand back!”

But before Harry could throw a spell of any kind at Hagrid’s door, Hagrid yanked the thick wooden door open. He towered at least five feet over them and glared down at them from beneath thick, bushy eyebrows

“I’m a teacher!” he shouted, though they were right in front of me. “A teacher, Potter! How dare yeh threaten ter break down my door!”

“I’m sorry, sir,” said Harry, throwing an unusual emphasis into the “sir.” Despite his cheek, he did put his wand away, to Hermione’s relief.

Hagrid was as still as if Harry had cast a Stunning Spell. “Since when have yeh called me ‘sir’?”

“Since when have you called me ‘Potter’?”

The growl in Hagrid’s chest was deep, low rumble, like distant thunder. “Very clever. Very amusin’. That’s me outsmarted, innit? Alrigh’ come in then, yeh ungrateful little…”

Whatever he was going to call them was lost as he turned away from the door to give them space to enter. Hermione’s lip trembled as she hurried in after Harry. She’d known Hagrid would be upset with them for not taking Care of Magical Creatures, but she had not expected this kind of cold treatment.

“Well?” Hagrid said as they sat down in the oversized chairs that had been squeezed into the one-room cottage. “What’s this? Feelin’ sorry for me? Reckon I’m lonely or summat?”

“No,” Harry said. “We wanted to see you.”

“We’ve missed you!” said Hermione, and she could hear her voice crack as she did.

“Missed me, have yeh? Yeah. Righ’.” Hagrid continued muttering to himself, but despite his irritation with them, he was the same host he always was. He grumbled as he took the kettle off of the fireplace and poured dark, bucketfuls of tea into enormous mugs. Hermione knew from experience that it was exceptionally bitter, but she sipped it to be polite, especially because she knew she would risk breaking a tooth if she tried one of his cakes.

“Hagrid,” she said, “we really wanted to carry on with Care of Magical Creatures, you know.”

He snorted, loud enough that Fang lifted his head from Harry’s lap to see what was the matter.

“None of us could fit it into our schedules!” she insisted. Which was, at least for her, very true. And Harry and Ron were terrible enough with time management, especially with Quidditch in their schedule.

“Yeah. Righ’,” Hagrid grunted

Hermione wanted to protest again, but a strange squishing sound in the corner distracted her. When she saw the giant barrel of slimy, wriggling, enormous pale maggots she could not help but scream. Even Ron jumped from his chair and moved to the other side of the table.

Harry was the only one who did not seem bothered. “What are they, Hagrid?”

“Jus’ giant grubs.”

Ron raised an eyebrow. “And they grow into…?”

“They won’ grow inter nuthin’,” Hagrid grunted. “I got ‘em ter feed ter Aragog.” And then he burst into tears.

“Oh! Hagrid!” Hermione hurried to his side and put an arm around him. She hardly could reach around his shoulders, but she patted his back. “What is it?”

“It’s… him…” Hagrid said between large, gulping sobs. “It’s Aragog…. I think he’s dyin’. He got ill over the summer an’ he’s not gettin’ better…. I don’ know what I’ll do if he… if he…. We’ve bin tergether so long….”

Hermione had never met Aragog, but she’d heard about him and his children from Ron and Harry, who had braved the Forbidden Forest while she was Petrified in the hospital wing. Aragog may not have tried to kill Ron and Harry, but he hadn’t done anything to stop his vast numbers of enormous spider children from trying to kill them.

“Is there — is there anything we can do?”

Ron, terribly pale, shook his head, desperately trying to avoid a commitment to helping Hagrid. They’d smuggled a baby dragon for him, raised Blast-Ended Skrewts, and tried to reason with his giant brother — not just giant in size, but a literal giant. Hermione did not blame Ron for not wanting to help with this, but Hagrid was their friend, and it seemed the polite thing to say.

Thankfully, Hagrid did not ask for their help.

“I don’ think there is, Hermione.” He wiped his cheeks with his floral print apron and blew his nose into it. “See, the rest o’ the tribe… Aragog’s family… they’re gettin’ a bit funny now he’s ill… bit restive…”

“Yeah, I think we saw a bit of that side of them,” Ron grumbled.

“... I don’ reckon it’d be safe fer anyone but me ter go near the colony at the mo’. But thanks fer offerin’ Hermione…. It means a lot….”

Hagrid blew his nose again, and they chatted about their lessons. Hermione was glad to know that there were some students at N.E.W.T. level, and Ron was eager to recount his success at Quidditch tryouts. Harry was quieter than usual, even when Defense with Snape came up. He did not mention to Hagrid that he’d earned himself a detention on his first day of lessons.

When they left Hagrid’s that evening, Harry moaned that he was starving. “And I haven’t got much time for dinner, before detention with Snape tonight….”

They walked as quickly as they could, hoping Harry could stuff something into his face before heading down to the dungeons. As they walked through the enormous castle doors, Hermione caught sight of Cormac McLaggen attempting to walk into the Great Hall. He ran into the wall on his first attempt, stepped away, puzzled, and reoriented himself to walk in. Hermione’s face grew warm and she looked at Ron, but Ron only laughed and headed into the hall himself.

Hermione, relieved, went to follow, but Harry caught her arm.

“What?” she snapped, perhaps more sharply than she’d meant to.

“If you ask me, McLaggen looks like he was Confunded this morning. And he was standing right in front of where you were sitting.”

Hermione considered lying to Harry, but though Harry was a terrible liar, he was rather gifted at knowing when he was being lied to.

“Oh, alright then, I did it,” she hissed. “But you should have heard the way he was talking about Ron and Ginny! Anyway, he’s got a nasty temper — you wouldn’t have wanted someone like that on the team.”

“No, no I suppose that’s true. But wasn’t that dishonest, Hermione? I mean, you’re a prefect, aren’t you?” But his tone wasn’t accusing. His grin said he was teasing.

“Oh, be quiet,” she snapped.

Ron reappeared in the doorway, none too happy with being ditched. “What are you two doing?”

“Nothing,” they said at once, and hurried after him.

They were nearly at the Gryffindor table when Professor Slughorn appeared so suddenly that it was as if he had Apparated, though Hermione knew he couldn’t have done.

“Harry, Harry, just the man I was hoping to see!” he said. “I was hoping to catch you before dinner! What do you say to a spot of supper tonight in my rooms instead? We’re having a little party, just a few rising stars. I’ve got McLaggen coming and Zabini, the charming Melinda Bobbin — I don’t know whether you know her? Her family owns a large chain of apothecaries — and of course, I hope very much that Miss Granger will favour me by coming too.” Slughorn even gave her a polite little bow, though he ignored Ron entirely.

“I can’t come, Professor,” said Harry. If he had meant to sound regretful, he had failed spectacularly. “I’ve got a detention with Professor Snape.”

Slughorn’s pleasant smile turned crestfallen. “Oh dear! Dear, dear, I was counting on you, Harry! Well, now, I’ll just have to have a word with Severus and explain the situation. I’m sure I’ll be able to persuade him to postpone your detention. Yes, I’ll see you both later!”

Harry shook his head as he, Ron, and Hermione finally took their seats in the hall. “He’s got no chance of persuading Snape. This detention’s already been postponed once. Snape did it for Dumbledore, but he won’t do it for anyone else.”

Hermione could not help but whine. “Oh, I wish you could come. I don’t want to go on my own!” She did not know Melinda, but she knew McLaggen, and she was not interested in spending an entire supper with him.

“I doubt you’ll be alone,” Ron grumbled. “Ginny will probably be invited.”

Hermione thought about saying something comforting, but the Evening Prophet arrived. She quickly buried herself in its contents while she ate.

“Anything new?” asked Harry.

“Not really…. Oh!” she flattened the paper out on the table. “You’re dad’s in here, Ron — he’s alright — It just says he’s been to visit the Malfoys’ house. ‘This second search of the Death Eater’s residence does not seem to have yielded any results. Arthur Weasley of the Office for the Detection and Confiscation of Counterfeit Defensive Spells and Protective Objects said that his team had been acting upon a tip-off from the Auror Department.’”

“So she did say something!” said Harry. “I told Tonks about Malfoy and that thing he was trying to get Borgin to fix. Well, if it’s not at their house, he must have brought whatever it is to Hogwarts with him.”

“But how could he have done, Harry?” Hermione folded up the newspaper. “We were all searched when we arrived, weren’t we?”

Harry raised his eyebrows. “Were you? I wasn’t.”

“Oh — of course you weren’t — I forgot you were late. Well, Flich ran over all of us with Secrecy Sensors when we got into the entrance hall. Any Dark object would have been found. So you see, Malfoy can’t have brought in anything dangerous.”

“Someone’s sent it to him by owl, then” Harry suggested. “His mother or someone.”

Hermione resisted the urge to roll her eyes at Harry’s persistence. “All of the owls are being checked, too. Filch told us so when he was jabbing those Secrecy Sensors everywhere he could reach.”

Harry looked to Ron for help, but Ron still looked sullen, and when Hermione followed Ron’s gaze, it ended on Lavender Brown. She buried herself back into the Evening Prophet.

“Can you think of any way Malfoy —?

“Oh, drop it, Harry,” Ron snapped.

“Listen — it’s not my fault Slughorn invited Hermione and me to his stupid party. Neither of us want to go, you know.”

“Well, as I’m not invited to any parties, I think I’ll go to bed.” Though it was ridiculously early for such a dramatic pronouncement, Ron abandoned the dinner table and left the Great Hall.

Hermione considered, briefly, going after him, but if he wanted to be hurt by something she and Harry had no control over, that was a choice he could make for himself. She and Harry ate in silence, her poring over the paper and Harry, she assumed, still trying to puzzle out how Draco Malfoy was planning to do the Dark Lord’s bidding here at Hogwarts.

When they finally got up to leave, they ran into Atalanta Shafiq, a third-year Slytherin and former member of Dumbledore’s Army.

“Harry?” she said, a little shyly.

“Yeah?”

“I’ve got a message for you.”

“From Professor Slughorn?”

Though Harry had said he didn’t want to go to the party, Hermione noticed the hopeful note in his voice.

“No — from Professor Snape. He says you’re to come to his office at half-past eight tonight to do your detention — er — no matter how many party invitations you’ve received. And he wanted you to know you’ll be sorting out rotten flobberworms from good ones, to use in Potions and — and he says there’s no need to bring protective gloves.”

“Right. Thanks.”