#what the hell do i have to do to have people guess my actual age xD
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mosscrab · 8 months ago
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mgsv has so many literary references to books i have essays abt it kind of makes me.
#i'm sick this is my slightly fever-induced thought stream in the rest of the tags sorry ->#all the 1984 stuff is really interesting. the position of both ocelot and kaz as the people running room 101 is really fascinating.#because it somehow manages to place huey in the position of winston while also having venom be in the position of winston.#<- would that make quiet julia? actually yes it does bc of her nature motifs.#and the whole game seems to doublethink of whats real and what isn't. though it starts to tell you what isn't real its still there.#and then with moby dick you have pequod which is just. the ship. and queegueg who is ishmaels friend. which is why its kind of perfect he i#the other pilot we see who takes kaz places. and theres other stuff with him but i don't want to get into that. i could go on for a while.#but whats interesting is that ahab seems to apply more to kaz than it does to venom. esp because his own deception results in his downfall.#whereas that isn't true with venom if youve played mg1 he just kinda keeps going with it to at least some degree.#and i guess kaz is working for foxhound but you know what i mean.#ocelot even being the perfect counterpart to starbuck who works at kaz's side but disagrees with his methods to an extreme.#he isn't of the same morals as starbuck but its just the oppositional character type.#does that mean cipher is moby dick. yes actually bc of the leg thing with kaz. oh my god.#<- funny enough i am actually getting moby dick back out of the library bc i never finished it and its been ages since i read what i did.#i remember the narration being kind of nuts.#honestly the lord of the flies stuff feels less like a reference and more like eli read that book and decided he wanted to do it irl. lol.#i can't say these books are even close to being favorites but i'm intimately familiar with both 1984 and lotf so those are. those.#and moby dick is genuinely just kind of. what in the hell did i experience. theres a lot to unpack.#and i didn't even finish the damn thing.#ok i'm done now i just needed to get that out of my system. now i'm off to read veniss underground. 👍#.txt
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sonknuxadow · 8 months ago
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I believe that IF Silver IS a descendent of Sonic/Shadow/Amy/anyone else, he's a descendent via adoption because the only Sonic character that I accept having kids is Vanilla.
honestly part of the reason im not a fan of the ideas of silver being a descendant of other characters we already know is because i just dont see why its necessary for them to be related ..? idk i just dont think anything that could be gained from him being shadows kid or sonics descendant or whatever is worth losing part of whats already compelling about silver and also making things super confusing. plus none of the pairings of already existing characters people have suggested as silvers bio parents make any sense, usually because its impossible from a timeline perspective but also because theyre always picking characters who would NOT have kids either in general or with the specific people theyre being paired with
#i also just kinda have a hard time imagining most sonic characters who arent already parents (so. most of them) wanting to be parents#it just does not feel right to me#i guess part of it could be an age thing . being a parent is an Adult thing and most sonic characters are not adults#so imagining them doings things that only adults do by in universe standards just feels strange and foreign to me#even though these scenarios would obviously take place a couple decades into the future#but also even when specifically thinking about it through the lens of ''would this character want to be a parent when theyre older''#the answer is usually no or idk#because there are a lot of characters where it just doesnt feel like it fits them?#sonic and rouge are a couple characters i can name off the top of my head who i know for sure would not have kids.#shadow im not so sure about either. yet he is the most common choice for silvers bio parent. pain#thing about shadow and silver is i think a timeline where shadow is actually around to meet little silver and is like#a mentor/older brother/guardian figure of sorts does kinda have potential to be interesting but i dont really want that to be made canon#but shadow straight up being his dad? idk man. not really into that. shadow being his biological dad? ABSOLUTELY not into that .#people having the present version of shadow whos a teenager barely older than silver being a dad to him?? weird as hell. no#asks#also part of what bugs me about the shadow as silvers dad stuff is people pretending its anything more than a baseless headcanon#like im not saying all headcanons have to have proof behind them but people act like the shadow as silvers dad thing#is an actual plausible theory that could be true and has tons of evidence? when it really doesnt ??#i feel the need to specify that im not trying to police what people do or aynthing just sharing my opinions
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iridescentoracle · 1 year ago
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@eglerieth replied to your post: Hello! I am here to ask about your Dior headcanons…
What’s your Galadriel headcanon?
Oh man, I didn’t see this!! Thank you for asking, i fully did not expect anyone to actually get far enough into the Dior post to see that let alone actually want to know. Sorry I’m two days late!
So! What we know about Galadriel in the Silmarillion:
She hated Fëanor but thought being a queen sounded pretty sweet/desired power
She’s named as one of the leaders of the Noldor across the Helcaraxë
Instead of founding her own kingdom (like she’d explicitly originally wanted) or moving in with her brother she got married and stayed in Doriath and learned a lot from Melian
Eventually Melian was like “hey so you should explain the weird ominous evil metaphysical cloud i can see hanging over the Noldor so i can explain about it to my husband bc he should really learn about whatever happened before it blows up in everybody’s faces” and Galadriel was like “yeah he probably should but i’m not telling”
At some point Galadriel asked Finrod why he wasn’t married yet
One time Melian casually foreshadowed Beren’s existence to Galadriel, who has no recorded response
That’s it. That’s literally all we know about what she was up to. She was super jazzed about the prospect of Ruling A Kingdom and then made friends with a queen and learned a bunch from her and… was still alive after the War of Wrath, and in between we have nothing.
We don’t know how she survived the Second Kinslaying, we can assume she made it to the Havens of Sirion but don’t know how she survived the Third Kinslaying let alone what she did/where she went after that… we don’t know what her reaction was to the death of her only remaining family member in Middle-earth, for which her cousins and the great-uncle in whose kingdom she lived were both partially responsible…
Like, that's weird, right? Galadriel is firmly established as someone bold and interested in being a ruler and stubborn as all get out, and then she… does nothing and everybody seems to forget she exists for several hundred years and some major political upheavals that should have personally affected her? It's not just me? That's really weird?
So, my Galadriel headcanon is that she’s inexplicably absent for most of the Quenta Silmarillion because she was deliberately erased/left out by the scribes writing things down because there was no way to acknowledge her presence in Doriath during and after Beren & Lúthien’s whole everything without getting into the messiest bit of Sindar-Noldor political tension that didn’t involve the Fëanorioni, because (again, headcanon) Galadriel Did Not Respond Well to her uncle getting her brother killed as a side effect of trying to get her cousin’s boyfriend killed and there was A Lot Of Tension for a while there (when you’ve got that kind of interpersonal tension between people who are both essentially Political Figures, i figure it’s probably going to turn into political tension unless they’re both trying very very hard to avoid that and potentially even then)
…and then after Thingol’s death a few years later, I think one of the primary contenders for Next Ruler of Doriath was Galadriel “Well I Came Here For A Kingdom In The First Place” Granddaughter-of-Olwë and also her husband is related to Thingol* and Lúthien’s clearly removed herself from contention so if the Sindar want a monarch who’s actually related to the last one they both qualify, it’s perfect and obviously Galadriel should be the next queen of Doriath (it is not obvious to everyone)
* on a side note, Celeborn is mentioned twice in the Quenta Silm: #1, Galadriel stays in Doriath because she’s marrying a “kinsman of Thingol,” while #2, shortly after Thingol’s death, Celeborn is referred to as a “prince of Doriath.” Not actual evidence, but it sure fits in nicely!
Like I said in the Dior post, I don’t think anything ever came to outright surface-level conflict; a civil war in Doriath is not getting left out of the Silmarillion. Tension between Galadriel and Thingol, though? and then between Galadriel and [various other contenders for the throne after Thingol, potentially including Dior himself when he arrived] that had everyone a little nervous? when she didn’t become queen and did (however begrudgingly) accept that Dior was the closest thing to a consensus pick and did survive the next several thousand years only to finally wind up as functional queen of most of the remaining Sindar despite eschewing the actual title? That I can see getting diplomatically left out of the histories, and explaining why she’s completely during the parts of the story where you’d think she’d be most involved.
#eglerieth#replies#lotr#character: galadriel#the silmarillion#listen i love galadriel more than words can express but so much of what's interesting about her is her character development#we know her best from LOTR as one of the oldest wisest most powerful most respected people in all of middle-earth#and she started as this stubborn willful power-hungry kid?#it's been a long time since i first read the silmarillion but i still remember discovering that and how it blew my mind#so while i do think all of this makes sense as An explanation for her disappearance from the text#part of why it's *my* explanation of choice is that i love that that's where she started and i think it's a shame we don't get to see more#of first age galadriel being this complicated messy figure who makes her third age self look all the more amazing#bc how the hell did she get there from here#so it works out so nicely if part of the reason we don't know more about early galadriel being Complicated™...#is just how Complicated™ early galadriel was#anyway the main thing i have realized in writing this & the dior post is holy shit i think about the silmarillion too much#i have. so many thoughts and opinions that i have never discussed with anyone and i don't even know what i actually need to explain#/what facts & opinions i need to establish as context for the stuff i'm actually trying to talk about#guessing the answer is "a whole bunch that i didn't‚ but not like half the things i *do*'' but i genuinely do not know!
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bonestrouslingbones · 1 year ago
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additionally now that i am dubiously an adult im realizing because of how much time i’ve spent in fandom since my tweens i’ve just kinda always been assuming everyone is older than me. like genuinely i’m only now realizing some of my distant mutuals that i’ve always figured were like mid-twenties at least are only one year older than i am. what the fucking hell where did you people come from
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rottingcompost · 1 year ago
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So the summer workers have started showing uo at work (generally 16 to 18 year olds) and one of them keeps looking at me intensly and im starting to think he's trying to figure out my age. Might ask him to guess since its really fun to hear what people think (I have legitimately gotten 15 to like 19 most of the time) and im always surprised that people think I look so young because personally I think I look pretty much the same age that I am (if not older sometimes) but idk it might be the dyed hair and wacky hairstyle and my height lol
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exopelagic · 6 months ago
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I am baking cake at midnight and it is going to kill me <3
#it’s just gone in the oven which means at least 25 minutes and probably more like 45 bc I made a Lot#am also kiiiinda winging the recipe so my expectations are on the floor#this is. for a bake sale. pray for me#I’m gonna make the icing tonight and leave it in the fridge overnight I think for tomorrow morning#this has gone wrong at every available opportunity it was 100% not worth it#however! given the prices my friend wants to sell this at i May have turned this into like over £100 which isn’t bad#TWO CAKES. WHY AM I MAKING TWO CAKES#I’m procrastinating washing up the stuff I used to make the batter (hell) bc itssosososo messy and I just wanna shout abt stuff#primarily that I am once again so upset that I only get one more week of ice hockey before summer#there are two parts to this feeling: 1. I love ice hockey I’ve been having such a good time this past week while I’ve not had to stress#abt anything else. 2. gay. gay gay homosexual gay#like okay I’ve been worried abt whether this is an actual crush or I just convinced myself I like him bc pretty+queer#(because of course I can worry abt that). BUT yeah sorry no can confirm I like this dumb fuck this is so unfair#we talked a BUNCH last night and he’s just really cool.#ohhhh fuck I don’t think the oven was properly preheated bc I opened it for a while to fit the two tins in. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#anyway!! he’s really fun to talk to someone help like if he does turn out to be single I could in THEORY text him over summer. maybe.#his birthday will be coming up and my friend suggested that. I’m being insane but oh my god this is torture#I ALSO watched the newest dr who episode today and that did NOT HELP. one of the first things in a while that have given me like#this same specific feeling when I get into gay romantic media. the ‘reading gay shit on wattpad at age 14 feeling’ if you will#where there’s like this weight in the pit of my stomach. it’s NICE that doesn’t sound good but it is#is this what straight people get with romance all the time. I know I just don’t watch/read much anymore but also#there’s straight romance in literally everything so.#but yeah basically I need another month of fuck around time minimum when everyone’s in this city so I can get my shit together#ALSO. I ONLY HAVE A YEAR LEFT HERE. THATS TERRIFYING. a year is a long time but it’s also not this one disappeared and this is like.#WAY too early to even consider that but he’s gonna be here probably for a year after I leave and that could suck if anything does happen.#I guess in theory I’m taking a year before phd probably so I could work here. idk man anyway that one is actually insane of me I’m just gay#boy 😔. they shouldn’t be allowed to do this#on Wednesday he’ll be done with exams and so will my other friend who knows him well. so I will be able to 1. subtly see w her if girlfriend#2. potentially. MAYBE ask what she thinks I’m just trying to decide whether that’s too much to put on her. I think I’m being insane there#luke.txt
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leclercwriting · 4 months ago
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age gap | daniel ricciardo social media au
pairing: daniel ricciardo x fem reader
you are an influencer who starts dating older f1 driver daniel ricciardo
masterlist
y/n.user
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liked by danielricciardo, yourbff1 and 567,930 others
caption: my life since the rumours
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yourbff1: the rumours are kinda funny tho
y/n.user: yeah.. "rumours"
user73: DOES THIS MEAN THAT THE RUMOURS ARE TRUE?
user62: what rumours?!
danielricciardo: xx
user83: daniel?
user2: wait... the rumours are that he and y/n are dating, right?
user74: yeah
daniel.jpg
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liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 123,938 others
caption: rumours confirmed
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maxverstappen1: this is how i get to know your girlfriend?
daniel.jpg: sorryy maximilian
landonorris: isn't she too young? you old man
daniel.jpg: she has an old soul
y/n.user: DANIEL
landonorris: hey y/n. I'm lando btw
y/n.user: hey lando
user73: omg they are actually so cute together
user46: lmao she's just using him
user9: weird
user525: she's still a child omg
y/n.user: oh I wish. But thanks for compliment that I look young
user3: she slayed
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landonorris
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liked by danielricciardo, y/n.user and 567,939 others
caption: if you go out with daniel and y/n, be prepared for daniel carrying her around...
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danielricciardo: she's always tired.. not my fault
y/n.user: ME? u always want to carry me
danielricciardo: not true
y/n.user: I'm done with you
landonorris: first couple fight?
danielricciardo: yeah..
user66: I'm starting to like them together
y/n.user: good taste
user3: idk but it's still weird
user2: she's so young
y/n.user: no wayyy
yourbff1: they are so cute
y/n.user: <3
y/n.user
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liked by danielricciardo, yourbff1 and 1,839,378 others
caption: I bought daniel new t-shirts so he can wear them to the paddock (haters will love these)
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landonorris: poor danny boy
danielricciardo: I actually love them
maxverstappen1: no way
y/n.user: @ kellypiquet Kelly buy some t-shirt for max too. Atleast he doesn't have to repeat outfits
user63: poor daniel.. she's manipulating him
danielricciardo: I literally picked those t-shirts
user73: daniel and y/n are the best couple. Argue with the wall
yourbff3: omg i love you for this babe
y/n.user: I ate
user77: u did!
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y/n.user
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liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 578,838 others
caption: enjoyed my first gp, and now it's summer break
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user83: most hated but the best couple award goes to... y/n and daniel
y/n.user: thanks I guess
danielricciardo: our shoey was 🔥
y/n.user: hell yeah
landonorris: what about me and you daniel? :(
danielricciardo: sorry lando
maxverstappen1: why is daniel acting like a teenager again
y/n.user: cause I changed him
user38: you really did
user3: I love this new version of danny
y/n.user: me too
danielricciardo
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 673,939 others
caption: enjoying summer break with the best people. y/n can drink!! I'm not serving alcohol to minors
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user83: daniel and his humour lol
y/n.user: baby u know that I can drink for a long time right?
danielricciardo: uhm of course
landonorris: he probably forgot your birthday
user63: yall stop hating and be happy for them
maxverstappen1: u kidnapped child?
danielricciardo: that's my nephew u idiot
maxverstappen1: oh sorry
y/n.user
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liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 345,388 others
caption: I want to have kids. Look at my man. He's so girl dad coded
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user73: uhm does she know that this is public account?
danielricciardo: Y/N?!
maxverstappen1: lol
maxverstappen1: @ danielricciardo u have a lot of work to do
danielricciardo: mate, kelly wants another kid too so shut up
user3: omg danny ric kid?
y/n.user: I hope
BONUS:
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algae-tm · 5 months ago
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SUMMER LOVIN’
Charles Leclerc x Reader
You and Charles fall in love in St.Lucia (one shot)
Warnings: none?
•••••••••••••••••••••••••
INSTAGRAM
youruser
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liked by yourbffuser, and 124 others
youruser: you think you just fell out of a coconut tree???🥥
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yourbffuser: HELLO??!! Who is the man????
- youruser: what man?
- yourbffuser: now i KNOW you aren’t serious. in the second pic!!!!
- youruser: oh him… that’s pookie 😋🤭
- yourbffuser: count your motherfuckin days
yoursisteruser: you collect white men like pokemon smh
- youruser: gotta catch ‘em all!! 😏😤
-yoursisteruser: sigh
charles_leclerc just posted
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liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc and 1,234,432 others
charles_leclerc: St. Lucia 🌊☀️
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user1: why is he so boyfriend coded in the 2nd pic?
- user2: don’t be alarmed bestie but it might have something to do with the literal girl he’s holding hands with in the 3rd pic…
landonorris: is this what the youth call a soft launch?
-charles_leclerc: you are the youth
carlossainz55: ay who’s the girl?
— charles_leclerc: No one and everyone
— user1: wtf does this mean 😭 😭
— user5: why is this simultaneously the dumbest yet most romantic thing I’ve ever read, and I have a boyfriend 😭
— user6: girl- tell your boyfriend to step up or leave him… the bar is in literal hell. — user7: bro releases a couple songs and thinks he’s cool and mysterious
youruser just posted
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youruser: cute solo travel idea- get a man to take you places
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yourbffuser: two posts with the same guy? I fear we’ve lost her
- youruser: NOOOO I’m still a bad bitch, I’m licensed and everything!!
- yoursisteruser: heartbreaker turns into lover girl… story for the ages
yoursisteruser: who is he???? Your fans want to know!!
—youruser: just a cute monegasque
—yoursisteruser: is that a cheese or something?
— youruser: a place apparently… he gets stroppy when I call him French 🤷🏾‍♀️
charles_leclerc just posted
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charles_leclerc: summer lovin’ happened so fast
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user4: two posts with what I’m guessing is the same girl… please twitter users starts sleuthing!!
— user5: or, hear me out, bit of a wild suggestion, just let them be?
— user3: do you think they were together b4, or he found her on holiday??
— user4: wait holdup I didn’t even think of the possibility that this could be just a vacation romance you’re so right @user3
— user5: why do I even bother with these people
pierregasly: day 67895 of asking you to tell me who she is!!
— user53: lmao Pierre is one of us confirmed
— user43: close! He actually knows Charles personally so no he isn’t one of you
— user53: now what did I do to you? 😭
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youruser just posted
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liked by yourbffuser, yoursisteruser and 150 others
youruser: bye bye bye you were bigger than the whole sky…
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yourbffuser: oh pooks
yoursisteruser: glad to know you have a heart
— youruser: bite me
— yourbffuser: time and place, bestie @yoursisteruser
MESSAGES
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SIX MONTHS LATER
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MESSAGES
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3 MONTHS LATER
INSTAGRAM
charles_leclerc just posted
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liked by lewishamilton, arthur_leclerc and 5,234,432 others
charles_leclerc: mine mine mine mine mine mine mine
(tagged youruser)
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lewishamilton: nice to see it brother! You know what they say
— youruser: once you go black!
— lewishamilton: I was gunna say the course of true love never did run smooth…
— youruser: mine works better!!
— user4: lmao she’s hilarious
— user5: and just as chaotic as Charles 😭 they’re made for eachother
—user6: idk I think he needs someone more introverted… she’s attention seeking (this user was blocked by charles_leclerc)
—charles_leclerc: blocked 🤭😙
—youruser: my man, my man, my man!
landonorris: she’s gorgeous
— charles_leclerc: why do you live to cause me distress??
georgerussell63: blimey, was only yesterday you told us you never got her number
— maxverstappen1: very stupid
— danielricciardo: Max be nice
— maxverstappen1: sorry
carlossainz55: well done cabron!
youruser: mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine
arthur_leclerc: she’s lovely
— charles_leclerc: isn’t she just
•••••••••••••
TAGLIST
@forevercaffeinated-lee
@callsignwidow
@a-beaverhausen
@emryb
@c0deincrazy
@dontworryaboutitokie
@c-losur3
@chuxk-lerclerk
@silkenthusiasts
@ietss
@sp1rl
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beardysuits · 18 days ago
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Piece of Jake
Logan has hated his body his entire life. Obese, gay, and a shut in have been a terrible combination for him. He decides becoming his sexy roommate Jake may be just what he needs to build up his confidence.
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I’ve had a crush on Jake for… well forever I guess. I guess that’s one of the perks of being a part of the same class every year since kindergarten; you get to see the cute boys become cute men. Then there was the downside of that, that anybody who bullied you from kindergarten will decide to do it until you graduate. They’ll do it for anything too; being gay, being fat, your race, your wealth. I was lucky enough to get 3 out of the 4 for about 12 years now. However, I’m ready for that to change.
See I was blessed with a fantastic combination of having a slow metabolism, and an anxiety which I decided to soothe with eating. The result has left me to be a 19 year old with a BMI of 42. And yeah, BMI is bullshit if you’re stacked with muscle, but I had the rolls and pudge to prove there was some truth to it. Combine this with the fact that I was more queer than a midnight premier of Rocky Horror, and I came out to be not the most popular guy in school. I thought that would all change once I went to college, but freshman year was hell. I essentially spent the entire time in my dorm room, locked up in the dark and playing video games. But, I guess it wasn’t all that bad.
See, back to Jake. Jake kept his status quo of being one of the top dogs from the ages of 5 to 18. Baseball star, debate captain, and voted “most likely to succeed” by our peers. Top all of that off that he was on of the few people who actually wasn’t a total ass to me, and you can see why I was head over heels for him. He was straight of course, and even if there was a touch of bisexuality in him, he would never be interested in me. Now color me surprised when I found out that not only were we going to the same college, but we got randomly assigned to be roommates in the dorms! I was astounded, it was like there really was an astral force looking out for me. 
So for almost the entirety of our freshman year, we chit chatted here and there, but Jake was almost never home. Instead, he was working to get himself into one of the fraternities and move into the house. While I was sad to not have as much time to admire Jake as I would like, that did give me the opportunity to go through his stuff. Mostly his closet. Jake wore the usual clothes you’d expect, hoodies, jerseys, wrangler jeans and the like. However, being that he was on the baseball team at the college, I found his stash of jockstraps he wore for practice. And good god, thank goodness laundry day was only once a week. The other 6 days I had a full time supply of used jocks to sniff and fantasize with. 
I even tried to put one of them on in a hormone-fueled rage, but my thighs were probably the same mass as his entire body, and I couldn’t get the damn thing on. The longer I admired Jake and saw him for who he was, the more my love for him grew. With that, so did my jealousy. Jake was everything I wanted. He was fit, cool, and could get any guy he wanted if he even batted an eye at them. My time alone did prove to give me an opportunity to do some research however. 
See, I’ve tried for a long, long, long time to get fit on my own. Watching my diet, exercise, starving myself. But, nothing would work. That’s when I started to look for more, creative solutions. I came across a blog hidden deep on the web which talked about taking another person’s form. Most of these seemed bogus, but I had to try. I found one eventually from a user, “Magic_Mann_720” who shared a potion, once which he claimed could turn anybody into a bodysuit. I was about to just toss it aside, but after looking at my desk and seeing the empty bag of McDonald’s staring back at me, I said fuck it. 
In all honesty, brewing a magic potion was easier than I assumed it would be, and after just a few short weeks of waiting for unusual supplies to arrive in the mail, I had a vial of the stuff at my whim. Now, who could I possibly give this to? No, not Jake. But also, maybe? Would that make me the worst person imaginable if I slipped this to him? He was one of the few good people I had come across, I couldn’t betray him like that. However, I saw one glimpse of his jock hanging from his hamper, and doubts crossed my mind. It was staring back at me, taunting me with how tight it fucking was. I had to wear it, and I only knew of one body it would perfectly fit. 
He was like clockwork, especially early in the morning when he made his preworkout and went off to the gym at 6 in the morning. I set my alarm for 5:50, just early enough to slip the potion into his drink before he woke up and set off. It was of course impossible to wake up so early in the morning, but somehow I managed to silence my alarm without waking Jake. 
I fumbled around in the dark and found his shake he made the night before. I had slept with the vial under my pillow, though I could barely sleep from the anticipation of my task today. Being careful to not wake him, I unscrewed the lid, dumped the contents of the vial into the jar, and shook it up. I had just laid back in my bed when his alarm woke him up. I kept my eyes closed, hoping to trick him into thinking I was asleep. I heard him stumble around the room, getting his bearings, getting dressed. I couldn’t resist popping one eye open to see his lithe frame as he found a tank and basketball shorts. 
He was already wearing boxers, but if my plan went accordingly, he never would wear such loose fitting underwear again. I heard him grab his shake, and my heart began to race. The pop of the lid went off, and I strained my ears to listen to him drain the contents quickly and quietly. The lid closed and just as I heard the doorknob turn, there was the sound of heavy stomps. I opened my eyes a bit wider to see Jake stumbling around, trying to get his bearings. 
“Hey… Logan?” Jake said weakly. I pretended to wake up and rose from bed, seeing him lean against his desk. 
“Jake? You okay?” I asked him. He turned his head to me, panting. 
“I d-don’t feel good man,” he said between breaths. “Get.. get help. Help.. me..” He slumped to the ground, and while I anticipated a loud thud as his jock body slammed to the ground, it was a soft thump, like that of clothes tossed to the ground. For a moment, I hesitated to creep any closer, afraid of what I would find. I mustered up the courage to turn on the bedside lamp and found a near horrifying site by the door. 
There on the ground was Jake, but he was flat as a pancake. He arms and legs stretched out, head deflated, and the clothes he was wearing were atop of him in a pile. I tiptoed to the body, already feeling regret in what I had done. Fuck why did I do this to him? Was I really so driven by my own lust I essentially just killed a good guy? 
My own footsteps were much heavier than Jakes, making the floorboards creek. I kicked at the body, the skin feeling as alive as ever, but made no movement of its own. I got on my knees, and with the tips of my fingers, grabbed Jake’s hair and pulled his head up. I was met with Jake’s face, his eyes now hollow sockets and mouth agape. I dropped the skin and scuttled back in fear. Fuck fuck fuck, it’s so god damn creepy! I took a few deep breaths and crawled on my hands and knees to the body once more. 
I tried to be more confident this time, grabbing him by his shoulders, and pulling him up as I struggled to stand. Jake was of similar height to me, so once I was fulling standing, I leaned the face to my mine, the tips of his toes still slumped on the floor. You know, it’s less creepy now. Jake was always a cutie, and even as a husk of himself he was irresistible. It was too late now, and while I felt bad about what I had done, I did it with a purpose. The issue now was, how the hell did I fit inside? Speaking of, would I fit at all?
I pulled at his cheek and found it to be rather elastic. My curiosity piqued, and I pulled at the corners of his mouth, which stretched at least a foot wide when I put some effort in. That gave me an idea. I quickly took off my shirt and briefs, catching my reflection in the standing mirror as I did so. God damn it, I was so fucking fat. My stomach hung out in front of me, almost covering my pathetic cock. Ass was as wide as trailer, neck rolls which made it seem like my head sat straight on my shoulders. Tits bigger than most girls I went to school with. This was my last chance to do something about it. 
I sat on my bed, laying Jake down in front of me like a pair of pants. Stepping one foot into Jake’s mouth, I stretched it further and further until my thick calves were encompassed by his lips. Grabbing at his chest, I pulled him further up my leg, already running out of breath as I did so. This was a workout on its own. I remember watching videos of guys slipping into wetsuits when I was a teenager, it was a slight fetish of mine. I loved seeing the neoprene cling to their slim figures. Those guys would go inch by inch yanking the suit further up them, so I went ahead and mirrored the practice. 
I found doing so actually made the process easier. Soon enough, my foot aligned with Jake’s. I shimmied his calves to match mine, but it was so incredibly tight. It was like my leg was vacuum sealed inside of him, crushing the fat around my leg down to match his. I began to pant, scared I was cutting off all circulation. I was so scared to look down and see something horrific, but shot a glance and was amazed by what I saw. There, my right leg was pristine. It was a mirror image of Jake’s which I had stared at so often when he wore shorts. I wiggled my toes, and Jake’s did the same motion. 
Kicking my leg around, the pain began to subside, and I could see up to my knee, it was like I had worked out my entire life. I could feel the beaming smile creep across my face as I stretched Jake’s mouth open wide again to shove my other foot inside. Now that I had some practice, my left leg was far easier to work with and soon enough, I had two sets of legs which were built from years of baseball practices and running. My thighs proved to be another issue entirely, practically twice the twice of my calves. 
I stood up from the bed, almost falling over from my balance being so off. Grabbing at Jake’s stomach, I jumped up and down a few times, his skin stretching and sliding over me with his lurch. My I stuck my hand down the inside of Jake’s mouth, the feeling of my now erect cock sliding against the inside of Jake. Although I wasn’t generously endowed, it still hurt to have it crushed inside of him. I found Jake’s cock, and while deflated, certainly overshadowed mine in length and girth. With one hand on the outside, and the other inside, I guided mine into his like a sheath. 
It was the most orgasmic feeling I had ever experienced. Jake’s cock went from looking like a flattened worm, to coming to full erection. He was at least seven inches long, and despite mine being half the size, somehow felt like it was filled entirely. It was beet red from anticipation, and while I wanted to cum right here and now, I had to finish what I started. I turned to the mirror once more, and was shocked by what I saw. From the waist up, I was still fat fuck Logan, but from the lower half, I was built like a god damn star. My new cock swung side to side, stiff as a board, and my ass, while squeezed in like a sausage, now was as perky as if I squatted 300 lbs. I turned and slapped Jake’s ass, watching as the taut skin slapped me back. All hints of cellulite gone. 
Finally was the part I was most afraid of, my stomach. It hung over the edge of Jake’s body, the flap of my stomach going over Jake’s lips. I sucked it in, which did practically nothing. Taking one of my arms, I pushed it as far in as I could, and used my other hand to pull the lips of Jake’s mouth up. I groaned in pain, feeling like a rubber band was squishing me in and threatening to cut me in half. Somehow though, his head moved up and moved. It was by inches and incredibly painful. Once I reached my belly button, I found a system to make it easier. Moving him up further and further, I finally reached my chest before I had to fall onto the bed. 
I was breathing heavier than ever, and drenched in sweat from what was left of my original body. I felt Jake’s, and he was as dry as ever, as he would never be worn out from such a task. I counted down from ten and hoisted myself up, catching my sight in the mirror. My moobs hung over Jake’s torso, but it was like I was wearing a skin corset. I rubbed my had over my new stomach, feeling how flat it was. In fact, I would even see the beginnings of a six pack bulging out. It was surreal, I don’t think I’ve been this thing since… ever. I took a deep breath and worked to shove each of my tits down Jake’s mouth. 
Each of them was a chore on their own, but eventually, all that was left were my arms and head. I don’t know how that would work, but if I made it this far, it was certainly possible. It would be tough as I would lose an arm at a time trying to slide them in. Taking my right one first, I wriggled my fingers inside, pushing them down Jake’s like a skin tight glove. With each inch my fingers slid in, it was easier and easier as I gained Jake’s strength. Eventually, the fingers found their way into his. I pulled at his bicep, as stretchy as the rest of him, and snapped it into place, enclosing my arm. 
I rushed to do the same with my left and with my newfound strength, found this section to be the easiest. I was almost done. Jake’s lips were around my neck, and I had to use his fingers to make sure he didn’t choke me. I glanced at the mirror, and found Jake with my head. I turned my body around, admiring his form. I had taken several sneaky glances at him as he changed, but to have full autonomy, to see his tattoo on his thigh, the way his veins popped in his hands, the curvature of his muscles, it was like I was being treated to a feast. 
“Goodbye Logan,” I told myself. I don’t know if I would come back from this. Or, if I would even want to. I took a deep breath and shimmied his head up my own. The same tight sensation took over my entire headspace and it was like a migraine hit me. Using my hands, I smushed my face around, placing my nose into his, eyes, lips. I fluttered my eyelids and had to refocus my vision. Going to the mirror was a picture perfect reflection of Jake. 
“Holy shit,” I said. Oh fuck, that was still my voice. I guess that wouldn’t have changed. I don’t know how I could pull off Jake’s voice, but I would have to practice it. I looked at the corner of my mouth, seeing my original lips peak through Jake’s. I took a finger, stretching and pulling it into place.
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There, I was Jake. Fuck I was Jake! I laughed and rubbed my arms across my body, watching as Jake did it in the mirror. 
I spent a good ten minutes trying different poses and watching as Jake bent to my will. Sniffing his pits, making funny faces, bending over and showing off my new hole to myself. That last one sent me over the edge and I knew I had to blow off the steam which had built up. I sat on the bed and hoisted my legs up, cradling the back of my knees in my hands. I could never have even thought about attempting that in my old body, but as Jake, I felt so lithe. My smile was beaming in between my legs as I puckered my hole. I had to see what this looked like. I wanted to see Jake be pathetic now. I twisted my face to match that of so many porn actors I had watched alone in this room. 
“Ohhhh… oh fuck me daddy,” I said, begging, watching Jake’s eyes as they wished desperately for a fat cock to fill him up. I split into my hand and began to pump my new cock, already slick and slimy from precum. I stuck a finger in my mouth and wet it before sliding it over my hole and slicking it up. I had plenty of experience playing with my old hole, but I always struggled to get my arm in a position to really get deep in. Jake didn’t have that problem though. I started to finger fuck myself, watching as Jake became his own bitch. 
“Oh fuck daddy, fuck me. Fuck me!” I yelled, the point of climax racing through my cock before I could even react. Laces of cum shot out and started to drench my body, reaching even to my face and getting into my hair. I pulled my finger out of my hole, let go of my cock, and felt it rest against my thigh. There in the reflection was Jake, covered in his own cum and looking like a bitch. 
I giggled, knowing I should feel far more guilty about what I had done, but too high on my own bliss to care. After bathing in my glory, I decided to clean Jake up and explore his body some more. I grabbed one of his towels and left the room, still naked. Walking down the dorm hall to the bathroom, it was still dead silent. Logan would have been petrified at the idea of being caught naked by somebody, but Jake? Well Jake now hoped somebody would see him and be jealous. 
Getting into the bathroom, I passed by Brad, another guy on our floor, who had a towel wrapped around his waist, still glistening from his shower. 
“Jake, the fuck?” He asked. I couldn’t pull off Jake’s voice yet, but I gave him a pat on the shoulder and winked at him as I pushed past. For a second I caught a glimpse of him checking out my body before he shook his head and rushed out to his room. I went to one of the mirrors in the bathroom and knelt over, posing and kissing at myself. Jake was going to become a lot more playful it seemed. 
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I took my time in the shower, feeling every crevice of Jake’s body and feeling myself up. And of course, stretching out his hole some more to work him up to taking a real dick. Maybe by one of his new frat brothers I need to meet. Once I got back to our room, I knew there was only one thing left on my to do list of the morning. I went to Jake’s hamper and pulled out the jock which was mocking me just hours before. I sniffed at, Jake’s pheromones becoming mine. 
I slipped both legs down and had no trouble at all this time adjusting my bulge and feeling the elastic hug my jock thighs. I snapped one of the bands, feeling a sheer run my spine as I did so. Slipping one of his black shirts on, I went for Jake’s phone, which thankfully could be opened with just his face. I snapped a few pictures for myself to look at whenever I pleased. Now, how about we download Grindr to it and see what this new body can pull?
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kikyoupdates · 2 months ago
Text
Girlfriend-For-Hire ⭑˚🦋⭑ 𝟶𝟷
yandere!ocs x f!reader
yandere, reverse harem, yandere reverse harem, original characters x fem!reader, slowburn, slowburn yandere
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Hoping to try something new and earn a bit of money on the side, you join an app that lets people hire you for your dating services. The idea is pretty straightforward — you pose as the client's girlfriend for a brief period of time, and in turn, you receive payment. But you didn't foresee everyone getting so attached to you, and suddenly, they're no longer satisfied with a fabricated relationship.
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“...you can do what now?”
“Hire someone to date you,” your friend, Ava, repeats. She chuckles and waves you off dismissively. “Come on, [Name]. It’s the modern age. People are always coming up with new things these days. I’m willing to bet there’s an app or website out there for practically anything.”
You blink in disbelief. Granted, there is all kinds of crazy shit going on in the world, and you’ve heard of companionship services before—like escorts or sugar baby arrangements—but to hear that something like this is trending nowadays is still undeniably a shock. 
“Here, look,” Ava gestures, pulling out her phone. “I was curious, so I downloaded the app the other day just to check out.” 
“Uh, don’t you already have a boyfriend?”
“He knows I was just browsing. I showed him too, and we scrolled through some stuff together. A lot of the profiles on here are wild,” she laughs. “It’s crazy what people advertise they’re willing to do. Get a load of this guy. He says he’s down to meet your family and make a total ass out of himself just so that he lowers your parents’ standards and the next real boyfriend you get will look way better by comparison.”
“Fucking hell,” you mutter. “I can’t tell if this is actually real, or just some new meme template.” 
“Of course it’s real! I think you’re underestimating how lonely people these days are. There’s definitely a lot of money to be made in this industry. Just look at how much people are willing to blow on their favorite streamer, even though they’ve never met them a day in their life. Dating’s gotten a lot more complicated lately, so I guess some people just want to skip past the troublesome parts and experience what it’s like to be with someone.” 
You furrow your brows. The whole thing sounds incredibly sad when you think of it that way. People would rather pay for a fabricated relationship than put in the time and effort towards building something real? Loneliness is starting to sound like an actual epidemic nowadays. 
“Well, I guess I shouldn’t judge people without understanding where they’re coming from,” you acknowledge. “It’s not like I know what they’ve been through. Times are changing and all. It sounds like this is actually starting to become pretty mainstream.” 
Ava nods chipperly. “Yep! I mean, I love my boyfriend, so I’m definitely not the target audience, but maybe it’s what some people need to gain a little boost of confidence and get back into the dating scene. I doubt everyone uses it in a romantic sense too. There are people out there that just want a bit of company every now and then. Isn’t it nice that they have someone to spend time with this way?” 
“Yeah… I guess that’s true.” 
Honestly, you’re still struggling to fully wrap your head around this. You understand the premise well enough, but you can’t really get past the part about accepting payment just to provide someone with a fabricated experience. Then again, you suppose that’s the case for most things nowadays. People are willing to spend the brunt of their earnings on in-game purchases for video games and other things that aren’t tangible in the real world, because even though they aren’t necessarily organic, it still provides them with some satisfaction. 
Long story short, it’s not up to you to decide what does or doesn’t make someone else happy, and you suppose as long as it’s executed in a professional manner, there’s nothing wrong with meeting new people this way. 
“Hey, I’ve got a great idea,” Ava suddenly perks up. “You should join this app! You’re super pretty, smart, and nice. I bet you’d have loads of guys lining up to hire you as their girlfriend!”
“Me?” You blink repeatedly, shuffling backwards the closer she leans in. “I mean, I just don’t think I’m the right person for the job. If it makes people happy, then I support it, but deep down, I worry I’d feel like I’m exploiting someone’s feelings just for a few extra bucks. Morally speaking, I’m not so sure I like the idea…” 
“It’s not exploitation,” she insists. “People know what they’re signing up for. At the end of the day, it’s a buyer-seller relationship. Someone pays for the service being advertised, and they receive it. As long as you’re not ambiguous about what you’re willing to do for the amount that you’re charging, people know what to expect. Of course, I’m sure there might be the occasional asshole here and there, but if they do anything inappropriate or violate the terms, you can report them through the app and they’ll be banned from using it.” 
You’re not quite sure how to respond to that. Some extra money would be nice. You’re a university student with all sorts of loans, so it’s not like you’ve got excess cash lying around. And it’s also true that you’ve been looking to apply for a new job lately, since your old manager was a total ass and you ended up quitting. 
Still. A girlfriend-for-hire? Someone like you? It’s just really difficult to imagine. 
“I actually think it’d be a good experience,” Ava goes on. “You’ve never really put yourself out there before. I know everyone dates at their own pace and stuff, but you shouldn’t have to be afraid. Who knows? Maybe you’ll meet some cool people and want to date them for real. And even if you don’t end up going for them, you still make some money, so either way, you’ve got nothing to lose.”
You chuckle weakly. “Yeah, I just don’t know. I feel like I’m better suited for traditional jobs. But thanks for the vote of confidence. I’m glad you think people would actually be willing to pay to date me.” 
“Girl, you seriously need to believe in yourself more,” Ava sighs. “I’m telling you, you’re a catch. But at the end of the day, it’s your call. You shouldn’t force yourself into anything if you feel uncomfortable.”
You smile and nod in agreement, and sensing your discomfort, Ava decides to change the topic.
But for some reason, you feel a twinge in your chest, and it’s hard to keep your mind from wandering.
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Later that same day, you’re lounging on the couch, mouth agape, having just downloaded the app on your own phone. 
“What the hell am I doing…?” 
You tell yourself that it’s just simple curiosity. Yeah. That’s all it is. Ava piqued your interest earlier, and now you just want to scroll through in more detail to get a better sense of what kind of people use this platform. 
The app is called ‘Partner For Hire’. The name isn’t particularly inspired, you have to admit, but you suppose it communicates its point rather effectively and leaves no room for ambiguity. Ultimately, this is a transactional relationship, and it’s probably for the best that clients know what to expect. 
You can use the app as either a buyer or seller. Meaning that you can create your profile and advertise your services, or simply list yourself as a prospective client and what your hobbies and interests are. In that sense, it’s kind of similar to most dating apps, since you have to take a flattering photo to go along with whatever blurb you’re providing. Of course, just because you try to solicit someone’s services doesn’t mean there’s any guarantee they’ll accept. This is an app where you can run everything yourself, and of course the company takes a cut of your profits, rather than an agency that matches you with a client regardless of whether you want to accept the job or not. 
There’s definitely a lot of flexibility, and you can easily choose who you want to pretend to date. If someone is interested in hiring you, they submit a request to be able to contact you, and once you accept, you can message them directly and establish the terms of the dating contract, such as the length and what particular services will be provided. 
You scroll through the list of boyfriends/girlfriends being advertised on the app, and honestly, it seems like there’s a decent amount of money to be made. Of course, a lot of that comes with building a good reputation and improving your ratings and visibility so more people will want to hire you, but it actually seems like a decent amount of people are able to make a living off this sort of thing. 
You bite down on your lower lip. Should you really go ahead and just do it? Like Ava said, there’s probably not much to lose. All the transactions are managed on the app, so you can easily report people who try to skip out on paying. Clients have to link their banking and personal info, so they’d be taking on a big risk by trying to scam people. You’re sure it might happen from time to time, but based on the reviews you’ve read, the company is really good at enforcing their policies and making sure everyone gets paid.
The money seems good, and it would definitely help take some pressure off your student loans, but ultimately, the biggest thing you’re struggling with is your moral compass.
People are willing to spend money for this kind of thing, and that’s entirely their choice to make, so it’s not like you’re extorting them or anything. Still… you wonder if it’s actually okay to profit off of someone else’s loneliness. You’ve never worked the kind of job that requires you to cater directly to another person’s emotions, and it kind of freaks you out.
But maybe Ava is right. There are all sorts of people in this world. Maybe some of them are just curious to try the app out. Maybe others just want to get their families off their back by pretending like they’re dating someone for a little while. There’s no way to discern everyone’s motivations, so perhaps there’s really no point in thinking about it at all. 
Most importantly, this could be a good thing for you. Life has been stagnant recently, and it’s true that you usually hesitate to put yourself out there. You’ll never learn what you do or don’t like if you keep on avoiding everything. This could be a chance to learn a lot about other people, but also, to learn more about yourself. 
Yeah. It’s time to stop overthinking for a change and just try something new. 
Thus, feeling unusually determined, you spend the rest of the day setting up your profile (finding nice selfies was the longest part of the whole ordeal), and with a resolved huff, you post it and officially go live on the app. 
You’re not really sure what you were expecting, but needless to say, there isn’t any immediate feedback. It probably takes a while for people to stumble across your profile, and even then, there’s no guarantee they’ll want to go out with you. 
I guess I was getting worked up for no reason. Certain people might find success with this kind of thing, but it’s probably not as easy as it looks. 
You scratch your cheek, suddenly sheepish over how needlessly excited you got earlier. You’re not used to stepping out of your comfort zone, so you must have gotten a bit carried away. 
For the rest of the evening, you set your phone aside and come back to reality. You get some homework done, make dinner, and by the time you’re ready for bed, you’ve pretty much forgotten about the whole thing altogether. 
That is, until you check and see that you’ve missed a notification.
“Huh? Someone viewed my profile and wants to message me?”
You’re undeniably taken aback. Not just because it’s happening a lot sooner than you expected, but also because it means that contrary to what you first thought, people are interested in you. 
Having minimal experience when it comes to dating and romance in general, you have to admit, the thought of being viewed as desirable is immensely flattering. 
Curious to see who wants to hire your services, you click on the user’s profile.
His name is Isaac, and he’s twenty-one years old, set to complete his undergraduate studies at the end of the year. He goes to a different university than yours, thankfully, because you can’t help but feel like it would be incredibly awkward to bump into him on campus after pretending to be his girlfriend. He’s studying to become a doctor, which means he’s still got a lot of school ahead of him, but you’ve always had a lot of admiration for people who are willing to commit to their goals and work hard. 
Also, even though you don’t want to sound shallow or anything… he’s really, really attractive. 
You frown. Granted, there’s more to a person than their appearance, but based on how he comes across in his profile and what his future career is, he doesn’t strike you as the type of person who would struggle to date someone.
But again, you can never know what’s going on in a stranger’s life. And there’s no real way to find out why he decided to join the app.
Apart from speaking to him directly, of course. 
[𝐃𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐫’𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬?]
>>[𝐘𝐄𝐒]
After a momentary delay, the screen loads into a messaging interface, allowing you to see what Isaac sent you and respond to him directly.  
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You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times.
All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 
More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 
You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times. 
All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 
More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 
[𝐍𝐚𝐦𝐞]:
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You’re admittedly a bit nervous, especially since you want to do a good job and avoid letting him down, but mostly, you’re feeling excited. All of this is uncharted territory for you, after all. Never in a million years would you have imagined taking on a job like this. 
And you really shouldn’t have.
You don’t know it yet, but this will be the cause of many, many regrets. 
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Shit. I’m starting to have second thoughts. 
Even now, you still can’t believe you’re really going through with this. After talking to Isaac and ironing out the finer details, you agreed to join him for a family gathering and pose as his girlfriend. You expected for him to have quite a few requests, but luckily, he seems pretty laid back about the whole thing. The better portion of your conversation was spent on getting your stories straight so as not to incur any suspicion, and since you’ve always been a good student and a hard worker, you promptly memorized everything there was to know. 
And now, it’s finally time to put this plan in motion. 
“Hey,” Isaac greets. “[Name], right?”
It’s the evening, since his parents are hosting a dinner party. The event is supposed to be pretty casual, but you still dressed up semi-formal in the hopes of making a good impression. He never explicitly mentioned how strict his parents are, but since they’ve been on his case about getting a girlfriend, it never hurts to go the extra mile. 
"Hi, Isaac,” you smile. “It’s so nice to meet you.” 
“You, too,” he nods. He’s considerably taller than you, and every bit as handsome as his picture suggested. Unless his personality is god-awful (which you probably would’ve picked up on after messaging him for so long), you’ve got a good feeling that most girls would be interested in him.
Still, everyone is different. He might have really high standards, or maybe he wants to focus on his studies, or perhaps it’s just a case of having never met the right person. Whatever the reason may be, his parents shouldn’t be pressuring him to date someone, and if you have the means to help him out, you’ll happily do it. 
“You look really nice,” Isaac says. He tilts his head to the side. “I hope you didn’t feel like you had to dress up to impress anyone. The most important part is that they believe I’m seeing someone so that they finally ease up a bit.” 
“Oh, I just did this for my own peace of mind,” you reassure. “I made sure to memorize everything you told me in advance, so I’m confident I can convince them that we’re the real deal. Even though this is technically my first day on the job… I promise not to let you down.” 
You blush, feeling rather flustered. The idea of being someone’s hired girlfriend is still a lot to wrap your head around, and you certainly don’t want to make empty promises, but you have every intention of giving it your best shot. Isaac is in a stressful situation, and you’re resolved to do whatever you can to fix it. 
“Can’t wait to get this over with,” Isaac sighs. He opens the passenger door and gestures for you to step inside the car. “Don’t worry. I know you might be feeling a bit uneasy, but I promise I’m not a serial killer or anything like that. I won’t hold it against you if you have 911 ready on speed dial until we get to my parents’ house.” 
“I trust you,” you insist. “I’ve heard good things about this app, and it sounds like they take safety seriously. They’ve got your information in their system, after all. Plus, I can tell that you’re a nice guy. It’s just a gut feeling.”
“I appreciate it,” he smiles. “Anyways… I guess I’ve stalled for long enough. You can probably tell that I really don’t feel like going. But the sooner I get them off my back, the better.” 
“I’ll be the best girlfriend you can ask for,” you beam. 
It’s a promise to him, but also to yourself. You are committed to taking this new job seriously, and for the rest of the evening, you will do whatever it takes to blend into the role that’s been thrust upon you. There’s no reason to get worked up. At the end of the day, all of this is pretend. It won’t be anywhere near as complicated as a real relationship.
Right?
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the-one-that-weeps · 6 months ago
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Most of you don't realize the limits of creating pjsk ocs are literally just "Hatsune Miku has bestowed you with a world from your feelings. Enjoy." So, I've come here once again to remind you guys to be creative.
Here are some parameters I rarely see being played around with while creating pjsk ocs:
Age: project sekai was created for a younger audience. However, characters in project sekai are a representation of the music producers (as in they create songs for Virtual Singers to sing), and a composer can be any age desired. This is not a limitation.
Character nationalities: yes, it would make the most sense for your setting to be Japan. However, seeing as vocaloid are international idols, that is not a limitation. 99% of those that read this have listened to vocaloid, only 1% if not less are Japanese. This is not a limitation.
Speciality: a common misconception is that, in order for Miku to become interested in you, you have to be a singer/composer. This makes sense, but had been proven wrong by canon itself: Rui is a director, Ena is an artist, Mizuki is a capcut editor. Heck, it's never even specified anyone outside of Nene sing in wxs. This is not a limitation.
People per unit: FOUR IS NOT A LIMITATION. PLEASE. If you're a perfectionist, you might want to have your card sets make sense, but I've seen people figure it out with groups of 3 or even 6. This is not a limitation.
I'm so tired of you guys saying it's not possible for an Urdu 70 year old lady to discover Hatsune Miku and go "oh! I like this :)" and then wake up in a parallel pocket dimension with a Japanese man pretending to be a cowboy, a Samoan Mozart-in-the-making twelve year old and Kagamine Rin.
It IS possible and if it's not, it would be FUN AS HELL, and that is PRIORITY.
Fuck shit up. Go crazy. Cringe is dead and you'll be too in a few years. Carpe diem til it kills you.
We don't know what a Sekai is, and we don't know what a fragment is. How are songs made? We don't KNOW! And even if you would like to abide by the pjsk worldbuilding rules, there's still so much you can play around with!
And don't even get me started on what you can do with SEKAI!! It's a world created from your feelings, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE, especially because we don't know ANYTHING about them!
By the rules we're given in pjsk, Sekai could solve world hunger. By the rules we're given in pjsk, you can technically bring an unlimited amount of cats into your world. And if you take in the Miku Lore about her being from the future, A TIME TRAVELING SEKAI IS SOMEWHAT POSSIBLE.
This post you might know me for was actually a recycling of my own ocs! And guess what, by the rules we're given in the game, THIS COULD VERY MUCH WORK.
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aryxchse · 9 months ago
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percy doesn't know.
— leo valdez x daughter of poseidon! reader.
inspired from the song ;; scotty doesn't know by lustra
summary ;; percy is oblivious about leo fucking his sister at every chance he gets.
warnings ;; nsfw stuff i guess, no full smut though. percy is being oblivious as hell, reader is sneaky and leo's a little bastard <3
a / n ;; wish my english was good enough to actually write some good smut, but please don't kill me because i just implied it 👐🏻 OH and they're aged up, obvi.
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Percy doesn't know that y/n and me
Do it in my cabin every Sunday
She tells him she's in lake but she doesn't go
Still she's on her knees and Percy doesn't know
y/n l/n, percy jackson's precious little sister. she was only a year younger than him, but he still acted like she was a baby. he tried to protect her at all costs and sweared that he would kill anyone who looked at her wrong.
and when she told him that she was dating with leo, he couldn't help but get even more protective. but he did not have the right to say something, because he was happily in love with annabeth. and y/n just wanted to live that kind of love too, she deserved it.
so when she told him she was going to lake, to swim and meditate a little, he believed her. she was too soft and naive to do something secretly behind him anyways. at least, that's what percy told to himself.
little did he didn't know was that y/n, was going to bunker 9.
"finally," leo breathed out when he saw his perfect girlfriend y/n. "thought percy didn't let you be alone."
y/n smiled mischiefly as she approached to him, already seeing him hard. it looked like it hurt, and she would do anything to make her sweet boyfriend satisfied. "doesn't matter, i'm here right? let me help you with that." she said, pointing his arousal.
leo only smirked when she got down to her knees.
I can't believe he's so trusting
While I'm right behind you thrusting
y/n's got him on the phone
And she's trying not to moan
"h-hi, perce. what's up?" she said, trying to hold her voice stable.
she wasn't going to open the phone, really. but leo, being a little shit he is, insisted. appearently he wanted to see how much his girlfriend was capable of holding herself.
besides, leo was too heated at the moment that he didn't even cared when percy called. she was close, he was close, they were so close to having the feeling of paradise. percy would enter the room and leo would still keep pounding into her, that's how hot he was. he couldn't stop.
leo bited back a laugh, thrusting into her more. he bended her over at his working table, the metal stuff throwed on the ground long ago. she tried to scratch the table but of course, failed.
"no, thank you i don't want anything." she said, arching her back more as leo kept his speed. she was so close to exploding that she was afraid she wouldn't be able to muffle her moans like she did now.
percy was on a date with annabeth at the amusement park and he was catching some plushies now. and he knew how his sister loved plushies, especially sea creature themed ones. "well, m-maybe you can get the shark one, thanks perce." she said, tears rolling down as her voice shaked a bit.
"okay, love you too. kiss annabeth for me." she said before hanging up, and releasing herself with a loud cry. she screamed all of the voices she kept inside while she hit her orgasm, panting on leo's desk. it didn't take much longer for leo to cum after her, a breathless chuckle leaving his lips.
"you did so well, princesa." he panted, kissing her back.
I did her on his birthday
percy doesn't know
percy doesn't know
percy doesn't know
it was august 18th, percy's birthday. everyone of their friends were invited, so it was normal for leo being there too.
the house was full of people, that percy couldn't even look or talk with his sister more than two minutes. everyone congratulated him on his new age and how handsome he turned out. bla, bla, bla.
y/n wore a white skirt with a blue crop top that leo got her at her birthday. he didn't said anything while he handed it to her, but the low neckline was making her boobs look gorgeous. and he don't even mention of how hot that top looked with that skirt.
leo held her hand as he whispered in her ear. "i need you, right now." he whispered in a desperate tone, a tone she couldn't say no to.
"leo we can't— the house is too crowded and-" leo kissed her neck secretly, only making her squirm under his touch. "that's why no one would notice." he whispered in her ear.
percy was talking with annabeth when he saw y/n taking leo's hand and dragging him to somewhere. "y/n!" he called, making the couple turn around.
"w-what's up?" she asked, trying to sound not too panicked. percy didn't noticed, thanks to gods. "where are you two going?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. which annabeth was going to be mad at him for it later.
"i gotta pee man, and she's leading me to the bathroom." leo explained, hiding behind her so that percy won't see his boner. percy was going to say something, but was intrupted by annabeth.
"okay then, we wouldn't want leo to pee in his pants on your birthday, right babe?" annabeth asked, not caring if percy was going to answer or not. and not waiting for it either. "but-" percy tried to say.
"great! be quick though, we're about to give him his presents." annabeth said like she knew, she winked to the couple. y/n gave her a warm smile, in a way only she could understand what she meant behind it. thank you, you're the best!
annabeth dragged percy to the kitchen while the couple got upstairs, making out the moment they entered the bathroom.
a / n ;; thanks for reading, you really survived to here fr 🫶🏻
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a-dauntless-daffodil · 6 months ago
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Emily: “I’m really sorry Vaggie didn’t feel comfortable coming back here. If there’s anything I can do to change that-”
Charlie: “Probably not! It was kinda a sign of her endless love for me that she visited haven again at all!”
Emily: “Oh! Oh that’s nice!!”
Charlie: “Which I NEVER would have asked her to do anyway, if I’d KNOWN the truth about her history up here!”
Emily: “Right. I’m so sorry about that too, by the-”
Charlie: “I mean, I’m not the kind of girl who askes her girlfriend to go spend an afternoon sitting across from the people who ripped off her wings! And her eye! And left her slumped against a dumpster looking half dead!”
Emily: “A… dumpster?”
Charlie: “Making the woman you love relive all that without even rEALIZING it would be pretty fucked up, wouldn’t it??”
Emily: “V- very.”
Charlie: “IT HYPOTHETICALLY COULD MAKE SOMEONE FEEL KINDA TERRIBLE AFTERWARDS, DON’T YOU THINK?”
Emily: “I’m sure it did!”
Charlie: “H Y P O T H E T I C A L L Y”
Emily: “Could! I could see that, yes, if it HAD happened, that would’ve been…”
Emily: “…”
Emily: “Are you- um, is she, errr.. doing better now?”
Charlie: “SO much better she’s doing SO great these days!!!!”
IN HELL
Vaggie: (lying face down on the hotel lobby floor) “I promise I won’t stop helping you morons when she dumps me. I won’t let her dream die just because I was dumb enough to think I could be part of it.”
Angel Dust: “That’s nice toots.”
Vaggie: “Thanks.”
Angel Dust: “Not sad or stupidly gay or anythin’.”
Vaggie: “Thanks.”
Cherri Bomb: “Sad? Angie, it’s perfect!” (takes picture) “I’ve been thinking this place could use a new rug…”
Niffty: (stepping on vaggie) “Squishy!”
Husk: “Get the fuck off her.” (at vaggie) “You, get the fuck UP.”
Vaggie: “Why.”
Alastor: “Hmmm, because this is PAINFULLY pathetic to watch, even for me?”
Vaggie: “Guess I’ll be here forever then.”
Angel Dust: “Vag-GAY c’mon, ya girlfirend’s not gonna dump ya. What’s the competition even!?”
Vaggie: “There’s an angel up in heaven who's helping Charlie work towards her life long dreams as we speak, and she's taller than me, got more wings than me, not as stabby as me, and also not a mass murderer or a liar or missing an eye.”
Cherri Bomb: "Hey!"
Vaggie: "No offence to the other one-eyed ladies here, but it's different when you've got a fucked up empty eye socket."
Niffty: (sighs dreamily) "I bet losing it hurt soooo baaaaad..."
Vaggie: "Never telling my girlfriend why I'd actually lost it or how it made me look like the deranged murder angel I was, even while she tried kissing it better for me, ended up hurting way worse."
Angel Dust: “That's a point….”
Angel Dust: “...alright, so Charlie’s PROBABLY not gonna dump ya-”
Niffty: “Oh that’s a weird sound!” (giggling) (bounces on vaggie) “I think she’s dying~”
Husk: “If you fucks kill her, I’m telling her demon princess girlfriend and pouring myself a drink to go with your fucking tormented howls.”
Vaggie: (muffled) “what if she’s my ex-girlfriend”
Husk: “…I’ll pour you a fucking drink and listen to your tormented howls.”
Niffty: “ME TOO I’LL LISTEN TOO!”
Alastor: “Dear one, perhaps if you were NOT standing on her skull and compressing her WRETCHED cries into the floor, we could be hearing them already.”
Niffty: “Whoops~ Heheheeh~”
Cherri Bomb: (recording it) “Damn, that groan’s been going on for ages… Bitch has some lung capacity on her.”
Angel Dust: “Point one for Vag-gay! Probs as good eating out as ya are at HOLDING out on ya girl!!!”
Vaggie: “uuuughhh…uaauuugghhaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaahhhhrrrgh..” (whimpers)
Niffty: “Okay.” (GIGGLES) “NOW she’s dying~” (bounces)
IN HEAVEN
Charlie: “Everything’s totally fine I have NO idea why you’d even ASK!”
Emily: “You’ve spent the entire time up here staring at pictures of Vaggie on your phone?”
Charlie: “I’m allowed to look at my girlfriend!”
Emily: “While crying and sniffling into your sleeve?”
Charlie: (sobbing) (desperately patting down her jacket) “SHE’S THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS WHICH OF MY POCKETS HAS THE HANDKERCHIEF IN IT, OKAY??”
Emily: (smiling) “I think you two are going to be just fine.”
Charlie: (BLOWS NOSE LOUDLY INTO JACKET SLEEVE, which catches on FIRE)
Emily: “…..not your clothes, though. You might need a new set of those.”
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godfistgonnalive · 8 months ago
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ultrakill dashboard simulator 2
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🐉 grounded Follow
this grey bitch has no idea whats coming lol
1,271 notes
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♦️ flesh-n-teeth Follow
Contrary to popular belief, I actually do not bite people.
592 notes
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🍵 benign-rodent Follow
Can we talk about how incredibly problematic the Lust Renaissance was? I personally believe the Council had every right to send Gabriel to strike Minos down. It's appalling to think people come on this website and say that Minos was in the right. Do some research.
🌷 strayandferal Follow
are we seriously having this discussion in this day and age? not only is this just an evil thing to say, but saying "do some research" afterwards is just blatantly ignorant.
🍵 benign-rodent Follow
As you can see here, here, and here, these are some proof that the Lust Renaissance was actually super problematic for both Hell and Heaven. To have the gall to call me ignorant when you probably only know very little about this topic is embarrassing.
🌷 strayandferal Follow
those are all obviously extremely biased articles. i wasn't damned to hell yesterday. there's no sources on them, either. come back to me when you have actual proof.
‎‎‎‎‎ ‎ Expand‎
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💣 skullonmysleeve Follow
CAN THAT FUCKING SENTRY OVER THERE KNOCK IT OFF
1,197 notes
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🔥 throughthefireandflames Follow
warning to all limbo-goers: watch out if you go any higher than the first part of the layer. i wandered into this air shaft (was curious if i could clean anything up there) and it's extremely dark. i feel like something is watching me
📎 wicked2 Follow
🔥 throughthefireandflames Follow
what. was that
2,765 notes
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🟥 teeth-n-flesh Follow
i bite people
11,089 notes
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💫 gabriel-judgeofhell Follow
Please do not contact me to strike down sinners you dislike.
🔘 meowrice-deactivated22340521
isnt that what you do for the council tho lol
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🩸 bloodpowered Follow
fuck v2 😞😞😞 #allmachinesarethesame no one talk to me 💔💔💔 #deactivating #abandoned 😢😢😢😢😢😢
🛒get-whiplashed Follow
i go fishing without you one time and this is what happens
4,522 notes
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🌵 sandfan59 Follow
today i saw some biogenic sand!!! i think is super cool how its all tiny sea creature skeletons... i collected some in my container to bring home and examine im so excited to get a better look at them
🪨 rockenthusiast234 Follow
if you come to my part of greed i can share my sand i have and you can share any rocks you find
🌵 sandfan59 Follow
hell yes. can we make out
2,002 notes
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🌟 heavenly-council Follow
6,345 notes
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⚰️ gutterthem Follow
i just crashed my fucking tram listening to HELL'S GREATEST COUNTRY HITS VOL. 35 on the cd player and when i got off all the guttertanks and mannequins were laughing at me
#is it over for me
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dotster001 · 2 years ago
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For Tuna; The Search Continues
Summary:gn!reader Grin has begun round two of his search for his your sugar daddy. Luckily, this time he got a babysitter for you, so no interruptions!
This is such a crack fic...And I deeply love it 😂
A/N: It's in my pinned post, and I've mentioned this in a couple posts, but if this is the first of my stuff you've read, I view NRC as an actual college, so reader here is 18+. If it makes you more comfy, imagine it as grad school age.
Part One Part three choose your ending...
"Thank you all for meeting me here," Grim said to the crowd of people. "And thank you all for the gifts. They shall be taken into consideration. Now, today will go as such."
He looked around the room in confusion. "Wait, it appears we are one person short, I guess-"
"Yeah! Me!" Floyd bursted into the room, revealing Jade clutching his cheek, and sitting on the floor.
"What the hell, Sealie! We had a deal! You promised I was in!"
"I don't know what you're talking about," Grim shifted in his seat nervously.
"Then I'm gonna squeeze you so hard you have to remember!" Floyd made to rush Grim, as Azul wrapped his arms around Floyd's middle, not even seeming to break a sweat as Floyd "ran" in place.
"Jade, please come get your brother, before he kills Grim and ruins it for everyone."
"I tried to stop him," Jade hummed as he retrieved his brother.
"Sure you did," Azul sighed, casting a quick stun spell so Jade could  get him out of the room. Once things had settled down, Grim called for silence again.
He put on a wig styled in your style and color.
"You will court me as though I am Y/N. You will only move on to the next round if you prove yourself here today. Any questions?"
Idia raised his hand.
"Yeah, who are the normies?"
He pointed at the two random Octavinelle students sitting at the table.
"Ah, yes. Two of our applicants couldn't be here today. They have special circumstances surrounding their absences, so they will be doing their tests at a later date. These two are here to remind you all to step it up."
Rook raised his hand. "Not a question, I just want to say your fur is looking soft and luscious today, monsieur Fuzzball."
Leona, Riddle, and Malleus all groaned and mumbled to themselves, while Vil massaged his temples in pure exhaustion.
"Thank you, Rook," Grim said with a smug smirk. "An anonymous donor has been providing me with a new fur product." Rook winked at him before grinning at Vil.
Silver raised his hand. Lilia attempted to shove it down, but it was too late.
"Again, this feels wrong to me. Firstly because Y/N has no idea about any of this, and secondly, because Y/N should pick their lover! I mean we've all known the prefect long enough to know that-"
"Look!" Grim slammed his clipboard on the table, calling for silence. "I've had enough of you and your goody two shoes ways! The only reason you made it through to this round is because the prefect says you're "baby girl", and I want to say I at least tried to think about Y/N in this process, but if you don't get it together, I'm cutting you completely!"
Silver looked at Lilia in wide eyed confusion, and saw Lilia was grinning. He wasn't sure which was scarier. Not knowing what the hell Grim was talking about, or the fact that his father seemed to be very pleased by it.
"If there are no more questions, then I will give you all the scenario. You are to act as though this is your anniversary dinner. Some of you have already lost points, because you forgot a gift," Grim pointedly glared at Silver.
"Oh! I almost forgot. Silver entrusted me with his gift," Lilia said, excitedly pulling out a gift bag.
"No, I didn't."
"Yes. You did."
Silver shrunk into his chair, as Grim happily accepted the present.
"Alright then. Now," Grim cleared his throat, then in a horrendous mockery of your voice, "Let us begin."
….
"Yo! Y/N!" 
You heard Ace's voice shout behind you as you kneaded the bread dough Trey had asked you to help with.
You turned over your shoulder, in time to miss Trey's expression darken.
"What's u-"
"Ace!" Trey shouted, startling both of you into silence.
"Perfect timing, I need to speak with you. In private," Trey said through gritted teeth, attempting to cover up his earlier blunder with a smile.
"What? No don't distract me, I'm here to-" but Ace was cut off as Trey not so subtly shoved him out of the kitchen, telling you they'd be back in a minute.
"Trey, with all due respect, what the fuck? You know full well that right now, Grim is running a practice date with-"
"Ace, shut up for just one moment, I'm trying to help you!"
Ace's mouth snapped shut in shock.
"My first question is, did you have to take out a loan to be able to afford to come here?"
"Yeah everyone has to-"
"The kind of numbers we are fighting against is people who have so much money, that they might as well not have even come here, because they definitely don't have to work a day in their lives."
"But Y/N doesn't care about-"
"Ace, seriously. I need you to think this through, or I'm leaving you here to rot," Trey said tiredly. "No, Y/N doesn't care about money. But they care about Grim. Grim, if he's as smart as I'm starting to suspect he is, is going to make his final pick, then spin it as a fairytale choice for Y/N. He'll wait long enough that they have forgotten about him interviewing people, and he'll come in with a sad little face and be like, 'Y/N, you're my family, but I'm worried that I can't give you everything you need.' And he'll continue to say stuff like that, and lay the ground work, until one day he sets up a cutsie spontaneous date in the living room with his chosen suitor."
Ace frowned for a moment. "That's…that's actually pretty smart. But Y/N says Grim's a dumb ass all the time. Why would they listen to his arguments now?"
"Ace, sevens, I shouldn't have to spell everything out for you. There's a difference between "my dumbass friend" and "my dumbass roommate, who is wholly reliant on me, who is also my cat, and who is my only family in this world"."
Ace pouted for a moment, before spitting out, "It's not fair! How are we supposed to even compete then!"
Trey grinned. "Well, we're here, and they're there. The plan doesn't work if Y/N has already picked someone before Grim has."
Ace broke out into a grin. "Trey, you're just as devious as the rest of us!"
"I don't know what you're talking about. Now, do you want to help Y/N and I make bread? This is a one time offer, after this you're on your own."
"Absolutely. Nothing like making bread amongst friends."
….
"Riddle, it was so very wonderful that they allowed you to have our anniversary dinner off," Grim hummed as he cut a piece of meat. "Unlike last year…" he sighed whistfully.
Riddle gritted his teeth. "I'm sorry, my rose, but it was unavoidable. I had to perform life saving surgery."
"You always say that. I'm starting to think you are avoiding me…."
Before Riddle could come up with a response, Malleus had risen from his seat and knelt before Grim.
"My treasure, our lives these last few years have been so wonderful, especially since we have been able to provide the Great Grim with his own estate, and a lifetime supply of sea meat. But I feel I cannot truly continue to share anniversaries with you, unless," he looked at the floor bashfully, "Unless they were with you ruling by my side."
Suddenly, a shimmering ring appeared in his hand.
Grim gasped. "Darling!"
"No fucking fair!" Idia shouted.
"Agreed, this stinks of deceit, lizard," Leona spit out angrily.
Rook subtly returned the ring box he'd been holding to his pocket.
"All's fair in love and war!" Lilia said with a boyish laugh. "But I suppose it is time for my move now."
He stood up from his seat, composing himself, before putting on a face of pure horror.
"My little bat, I beg you not to accept his proposal! You see, as his longtime attendant, and closest adviser, and general of his armies-"
"General?" Vil muttered under his breath, as he furrowed his brow in utter confusion.
"Aim high, I guess," Riddle muttered back.
"I have come to the terrible knowledge that, his highness, king of those who worship darkness, and highest of all draconic fae, has been seeing another on the side!"
"No!" Grim gasped.
"That's a vicious lie!" Malleus spit out, a green thunderbolt striking the ground behind him.
"Is it? Then why did I see you roaming the grounds in a lover's embrace with Silver yesterday?"
"What!" Silver shot up from his seat.
"No, that wasn't what it looked like!"
"Malleus! How could you do this to me? And on our anniversary no less?" Grim sobbed.
Malleus rushed to explain himself, while Lilia handed Silver a notecard.
"No! I'm not…I'm not reading this!" Silver exclaimed.
"Just do it! It's fun!" Lilia laughed, completely ignoring the sobbing Grim, and terrified Malleus.
"No! Fa-Lilia, how does this not seem weird to you in any way? How are you okay with any of this?"
Lilia stared at him blankly, before understanding dawned on his eyes. "Oh, right, see because I raised you so well, I sometimes forget you are human. But we do this all the time back home. I've hosted three of these for you already." 
Lilia shrugged, totally ignoring Silver's jaw dropping. 
"Obviously, no one has been worthy of my precious Silver, but I figure if anyone is it's Y/N. See if you win, you get Y/N, and I've raised the perfect son. If I win…well your odds are high of also someday finding a kick ass person."
Silver would have yelled at his father about the Insanity of his thought process, except he collapsed back in his chair and was asleep.
"That's it!" Grim shouted. "I'm clearly not enough for you! It's over!"
Malleus started sobbing. 
"For seven's sake," Vil groaned, before standing up, and stepping around Malleus' fetal positioned body. "Darling, I decided we're finally going to go on that vacation we've always dreamed about. And Grim will obviously come too, with all the gold and food  he could ever wish for. Happy anniversary, my apple blossom."
"Oh Vil, how romantic!" The betrayal from earlier completely forgotten, Grim sighed happily.
"But how are we able to afford it?"
"Sorry?" Vil choked.
"Your manager called this morning. She says no one wants to cast you anymore because you're too old."
"Excu-!"
"Vil, you're almost 25 now," Grim said pointedly. "You're practically dead in the industry, and those looks are only going to hold up for so long."
"I bought you an island!" Idia shouted over the table.
"Oh?"
"I bought you an island, and the ocean around it," Azul said with a smirk.
"Oh yeah? And how is Y/N supposed to get there, if I bought all the yachts, and patented all travel technology for myself?!" Idia shouted, hair turning a deep crimson.
"I will turn Y/N into the siren they were always meant to be, and they will swim to our island and oceanic home, far away from the dystopia of you running everything!" Azul hissed.
"Capitalist dipshit!" Idia yelled, before launching himself at Azul, both of them soon wrestling on the floor.
In the chaos, Rook, had snuck over to Grim and wrapped an arm around his shoulder.
"Mon amour, let us escape this room to explore parad-"
Leona yanked him by the collar, looking him right in the face.
"Back away from my mate, hunter."
"Oh Rois des Leones. I shan't surrender to you."
And now Leona and Rook were wrestling.
"Look, darling, I meant to get last year's anniversary off, but-" 
"Save it, Riddle," Grim somehow managed to get his sniffle to carry over the fighting. "All you care about is work!"
"It's the only way to afford the lifestyle I want to give you! I want to clothe you in finery the Queen of Hearts could only dream of!"
"If only I could believe that was true, you're only doing this to please your mother."
"I'm not old!" Vil suddenly shouted, as one of the wrestling duos hit the table too hard and caused it to collapse.
Grim pushed back a lock of Vil's hair, and smirked. "Is this a gray hair I see?"
"What?" Vil panicked and pulled out his mirror, before tripping over the still sobbing Malleus.
"Little bat, our romance is forbidden,"Lilia whispered into Grim's ear. "But now that you know Malleus is cheating on you, we can run away together! Start our own kingdom elsewhere! We'll be so happy together!"
"Lilia, I am flattered, but I think I should try to make it work with Malleus…"
"What? After all he's done to you? He tore out your heart and gave it to Silver!" Lilia shouted, before pointing at the seat Silver was passed out in. Or used to be passed out in.
"Where did Silver go?" It was the last thing Lilia got out before getting knocked over by a wrestling duo.
….
Silver wandered aimlessly through the NRC halls, trying to clear his head. 
"Silver?" He heard from behind him. He turned and saw Jamil, holding a bag of ingredients.
"If you're looking for, well, everyone, they're baking in Heartslaybul. I'm headed there right now with more flour of you want to come."
Silver nodded, figuring some baking would help him relax. When they arrived he saw you, the first years, Trey, Cater, Ruggie, Kalim and  Ortho, all baking in harmony.
"Trey, I brought Silver and the flour you texted for- Kalim! What are you doing here!" Jamil's calm voice turned into panicked yelling.
"What do you mean?" Kalim's asked, all confused. But Jamil was already shoving him out the door.
"You're supposed to be at…that thing. Remember? We talked about it?"
"Oh yeah! The thing where grikahzj" Jamil covered Kalim's mouth as they both stepped out the door.
"Well, since Kalim is gone, you can help me with kneading the dough, Silver," you said with a bright smile.
Silver smiled softly, and nodded, before joining you at your station.
….
Epilogue
One week later 
"Darling! I'm the headmaster, I can't just take off because our anniversary happens to be in the middle of a school week! You said you understood that when we got married!"
"You told me you were fine that I had a career in fashion! You know I think you are more beautiful than any model, why are you jealous now?"
Grim simpered in his seat, taking a sip of his apple juice, before saying in his Y/N voice, "I think we should see other people. Happy anniversary."
"No!"
....
Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic @supertmntgirl @cxsmicdustdreams @aethermostbeloved @krystalkiller25 @asmallbean3 @theneurodivergentdummy @candlewitch-cryptic @smilingfox22-blog
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lostfracturess · 21 days ago
Text
remedies and reasons | ch. 03
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pairing — professor geto x law student reader
summary — this wasn’t supposed to happen. not that miserable internship at the law firm you hated, not him becoming your doctor, and definitely not that drunken night at the bar. but he helped, and god, you needed a friend. and he did too. except it's never just friendship with him, is it? it could be perfect—messy, complicated, but perfect. if only his heart wasn’t already taken.
word count — 11.8 k
warnings — 18+ ONLY. contains explicit sexual content, age difference (10 years), doctor-patient relationship, smoking, alcohol use, mature themes, and depictions of illness. reader discretion is advised.
author's note — hey everyone! i'm back with a new chapter, and i know it's been a while. this time, we're diving back into suguru's head to explore his conflicting feelings. as always, this story is a spin-off of symptoms and causes, starting after chapter 12, but it can be read as a standalone. this chapter takes place during the events of chapter 14, where things were pretty intense, so get ready for suguru's perspective on those events, plus some extra bonding time with a certain law student.
series masterlist + playlist + ao3 + wattpad
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(note: r&r reader)
What a strange fucking day.
The coffee from the hospital cafeteria tasted like burnt rubber, leaving a bitter aftertaste that matched my state perfectly. Everything felt slightly out of sorts, like the world had shifted two inches to the left while I wasn't looking, and I was the only one who noticed.
I'd put on mismatched socks this morning, didn't notice until I was already at work. Stepped in a puddle that somehow soaked through my supposedly waterproof shoes. Small things, really. Inconsequential. But they piled up like evidence that I wasn't quite myself lately.
And on top of that, my mind kept drifting back to the sports bar, to easy laughter and surprisingly good conversation. To someone who actually managed to make me forget about work for a few hours. It was... nice. Different. Unsettling. Probably why I let things get carried away. 
What the hell had gotten into me?
I wasn't the type to hook up in bar bathrooms. I didn't do reckless. I was the responsible one, always cleaning up other people's messes — usually Satoru's. 
Yet here I was, distracted and unfocused because of a law student who somehow got under my skin without me even realizing it. Frustrating. That's what it was.
I stared at the ruined samples in front of me, the third batch I'd had to throw out this morning. A stupid beginner's mistake — mixing the reagents in the wrong order like some first-year med student. The solution had turned an ugly shade of red instead of the pale blue it was supposed to be, completely useless now.
I slammed the test tube rack down harder than necessary, making the glass containers rattle. A few drops of the failed experiment splashed onto my lab coat. Perfect. Just perfect.
I glanced at Satoru across the lab bench. He'd been staring at the same equation for twenty minutes now, his leg bouncing that infuriating rhythm that made me want to stab him with my pen. The same nervous energy that had been radiating off him all morning. Neither of us was really focused on work it seemed.
"You going to tell me what's wrong, or do I have to guess?" I finally asked, perhaps partly to distract myself from my own thoughts.
He blinked, as if just remembering I was there. "Nothing's wrong."
"Really? Because you've been glaring at that formula for like an hour."
"Maybe I just enjoy looking at my own handwriting. It's pretty, isn't it? Unlike yours."
"At least the nurses can read my prescriptions without three callbacks."
"That was one time." He spun in his chair to face me. "And the pharmacy figured it out eventually."
I need a cigarette.
No, I need several cigarettes.
I was about to retort when a soft knock echoed through the lab. We both turned toward the door, and suddenly all my annoyance vanished. It was her.
Standing there in the doorway, clutching a folder to her chest, looking almost nervous. Her eyes darted between Satoru and me, and I could see the moment she registered the awkwardness of the situation.
She was wearing a crisp blazer, her hair pulled back neatly — every inch the professional law intern. Maybe it was the confused sleep deprivation talking, but I swore I caught a hint of pink creeping across her cheeks when our eyes briefly met before she looked away.
"Oh," she said. "I didn't expect to find you both here."
Satoru straightened up, his demeanor shifting instantly to doctor mode. "Everything okay? Is it your medication?"
"No, no," she quickly assured him. "Actually, I'm here about the... um, the legal consultation from the other day?" She held up the folder. "Mr. Higurama asked me to get both your signatures on these forms."
"More paperwork?" Satoru groaned theatrically. "They really love their forms at that firm, don't they? I bet they have forms for their forms."
She laughed — not the bold, uninhibited laugh from the bar, but something smaller, more contained. Professional. It was strange seeing her like this, all sharp edges and formal wear, when just days ago we'd been trading stories over beer and darts.
"Well," she said, stepping fully into the lab, "we do love forms, yes." Her eyes landed on the mess of failed experiments on our benches, the chaos of scribbles on the whiteboard. I just now realized how utterly chaotic the whole lab was. "Bad time?"
"No," I said, maybe too quickly. "Just a rough morning in the lab."
"Rough morning?" Satoru raised an eyebrow. "This is the first time I've seen him mess up this experiment since university. Usually he's annoyingly perfect."
I shot him a look that promised murder. Or at least severe bodily harm.
She glanced between us, a hint of unease, her fingers tightening on the folder as she took a small step back. "Should I come back later? When there's less...chaos?"
"No, it's fine," I said, reaching for the folder. Our fingers brushed as she handed it over, and I found myself wondering if she was still thinking about that night too. Probably not. She was just here doing her job.
I opened the folder, scanning the documents inside. More forms about professional conduct and boundaries. The irony wasn't lost on me.
"These need both our signatures?" I asked.
She nodded. "Mr. Higurama was very specific about that."
I grabbed a pen and signed where indicated, then passed the folder to Satoru. As he signed, I caught her stifling a yawn.
"Long night?" I asked.
"Just law student things," she replied with a tired smile. "Coffee and case studies until 3 AM."
"Sounds familiar," I said, thinking of my own sleepless night, though for very different reasons. "Though I prefer my all-nighters with better coffee than whatever they serve at that firm."
"Our coffee is not that bad actually—"
Before she could finish, Satoru thrust the folder at her. "Here," he said. "All signed and ready to go back to the fun police." He glanced at his phone, then suddenly stood up. "Speaking of which, I need to go. Got a... thing."
A thing? I raised an eyebrow at him, but he was already halfway to the door. "Don't mess up any more experiments, Suguru," he called over his shoulder, and then he was gone, leaving us alone in the now quiet space.
She stood there, folder clutched to her chest, looking unsure. "Is Dr. Gojo okay? He seems a bit on edge."
"Not more than usual, I guess."
"So that failed experiment over there?" She gestured past me with her finger.
I glanced at my failed experiment, which had now turned an alarming shade of green that definitely wasn't in any textbook I'd ever read. Either I'd just discovered a new chemical compound, or I was about to violate several safety protocols. Possibly both.
"Observant. They teach you that in law school?"
"No, that's just natural talent," she said, some of that bar night ease creeping back into her voice. "Though I have to say, watching things change color isn't usually part of my job description."
"Consider it a bonus lesson in chemistry." Before I could overthink it, I heard myself asking, "Have you had lunch yet?"
She hesitated, shifting the folder in her arms. "I should probably get these back to Mr. Higurama—" Just then, the folder slipped from her grasp, papers scattering across the lab floor. "Oh god," she muttered, immediately dropping to her knees to gather them.
In her haste to collect the papers, she bumped into the lab bench. The rack of test tubes rattled precariously. I lunged forward, managing to catch the rack just as it started to tip, but not before one of the tubes spilled its contents onto the counter.
"I'm so sorry!" She scrambled to her feet, papers clutched messily to her chest, her cheeks now bright red. "I swear I wasn't trying to sabotage your experiments. Though they were already ruined anyway—not that that makes it better! I just meant—"
I watched her frantically trying to collect the papers, a small smile tugging at my lips despite the chaos. "I'll pay," I offered, cutting off her rambling. "Besides, we should probably get going, that failed experiment's probably going to turn purple next and who knows what happens then."
She paused mid-reach for another paper, looking up at me with wide eyes. "Are you threatening me with your failed experiment to get me to have lunch with you?"
"Is it working?"
She glanced at the door where Satoru had disappeared, then back at me, fidgeting with the crumpled papers in her arms. "You know what? Yeah. If you really want to—I mean, after I almost destroyed your lab—"
"Well, you're certainly making my morning more interesting."
She tried to smooth out the crumpled papers, only managing to wrinkle them more. "Oh, I mean—Is that a good thing? Because I can't tell if you're complimenting me or—"
"Come on, Attorney, let's get you away from any breakable objects," I said, already shrugging off my lab coat and heading for the door. "I know a good place and trust me after that, you'll never defend that law firm sludge again."
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(note: r&r reader)
The café was tucked away in a narrow alley, the kind of place you'd walk right past unless you knew what you were looking for. Inside, the air was thick with the scent of freshly ground coffee beans and something sweet baking in the back.
She looked around, taking in the worn leather chairs and mismatched mugs, the walls lined with old medical textbooks and vintage anatomy charts. "So this is where all the doctors hide out?"
"Best kept secret in the hospital district," I said, leading her to a small table by the window. "Though I'm pretty sure I'm violating some sacred code by bringing a lawyer here."
The owner, an elderly man who'd been serving coffee to sleep-deprived medical staff for longer than I'd been alive, brought over two cups without us having to order. The coffee was served in glass cups, the dark liquid nearly black, with a perfect crema on top.
"What is this?" she asked, leaning forward to inspect the cup.
"Just trust me."
She raised an eyebrow. "The last time a doctor told me to 'just trust them,' I ended up with a prescription that made me sleep for sixteen hours straight."
"Satoru's work, I assume?"
"Maybe."
I watched as she lifted the cup, inhaling. Her eyes widened slightly. "Oh."
"Try it," I said, finding myself oddly invested in her reaction.
She took a careful sip, and I couldn't help but smile as her expression changed — surprise, then joy, then something close to awe.
"Holy shit," she whispered, staring at the cup like it held the secrets of the universe.
"Better than the law firm sludge?"
"Okay, fine, you win." She took another sip, closing her eyes. "What is this?"
"Family secret, apparently. The owner won't tell anyone, not even me." I picked up my own cup. "Though I have my theories."
"Care to share?"
"Doctor-patient confidentiality."
She kicked me lightly under the table. "I'm not your patient."
"No," I agreed, the words carrying more weight than I'd intended. "You're not."
She looked away, suddenly very interested in the anatomy chart on the wall, a slight flush creeping up her neck. I caught myself enjoying her reaction more than I probably should.
"You know," I said, breaking the silence, "you still haven't shown me your paintings."
Her eyes snapped back to mine. "What?"
"At the bar, you promised to show me your work someday." I took another sip of coffee. "Unless that was just the alcohol talking."
"I did not promise anything," she protested, but her fingers fidgeted with the handle of her cup. "And I don't really show my work to people."
I leaned back in my chair, studying her. "Not even to doctors who hold your hand during MRI scans?"
"Especially not to doctors who do such unethical things, Dr. Geto." But there was a smile playing at the corners of her mouth.
"I seem to recall you saying my hands were very good or something."
Her cheeks flushed pink, and she fumbled with her coffee cup, nearly sending it sloshing over the rim. "I did not say that."
"No? Must have been another patient then."
"Can we please pretend I never said anything about your hands?" She shifted in her seat, clearly flustered. "Or anything else that happened that day?"
"Show me your paintings and I might consider selective amnesia."
"Are you actually blackmailing me with my own embarrassing moments?" She leaned forward slightly. "I should sue you for violation of doctor-patient confidentiality."
"Please don't. I have enough lawyers breathing down my neck as it is."
"Oh, I know." Her lips twitched into a smile. "Your case files take up an entire cabinet at the firm."
"Now who's the unethical one?" I couldn't help but smile. "Pretty sure those files are supposed to be confidential."
"See the positive." The corner of her mouth quirked up, and she propped her chin on her hand. Her sleeve slid down slightly. "I can help you. Though my rates are quite steep—one painting viewing equals one legal consultation."
"Brutal negotiation tactics. They're teaching you well at that firm."
She bit her lip, fighting back a grin. The gesture was distracting in a way I didn't want to examine too closely. Then, she wrapped her hands around her cup, leaning forward slightly. "Speaking of teaching, how's that research project going?"
I groaned, running a hand through my hair. "Can we not? I'd rather hear about your law stuff."
"Oh god no," she groaned in return, slumping back in her chair. "Let's not talk about that either."
"That bad, huh?"
"You have no idea. Just endless stacks of papers and Chad being... well, Chad."
"Chad?" I raised an eyebrow.
"This awful intern who thinks he owns the place because his dad's some stupid partner. Like, today he tried to take credit for my research on the Yamamoto case, which, by the way, I spent three nights working on. And then he had the nerve to correct my citations in front of everyone, except he was wrong. He was completely wrong, and everyone knew it, but nobody said anything because, you know, his dad and everything—" 
She stopped abruptly, her eyes widening as if just realizing she'd been rambling again. Her hands fluttered nervously around her coffee cup. "Sorry, I'm talking too much, aren't I?"
"No," I said, surprising myself with how much I meant it. "I like hearing you talk."
Her eyes met mine, startled. "You do?"
"Yeah. It's... refreshing, I mean hearing about anything that's not related to someone's blood and lab work." I traced the rim of my cup with my finger. "Is this Chad giving you trouble? Because I could always stop by the firm, maybe have a word with him."
She let out a startled laugh, then immediately looked embarrassed by how loud it was. A few other people glanced our way, making her shrink slightly in her seat.
"What, are you offering to intimidate him for me?"
"I can be quite intimidating when I want to be."
"That's a weird thing to say about oneself."
"You say way more weird things." I glanced at my watch and couldn't help but sigh. "Speaking of intimidating, I've got a class of overconfident med students waiting."
"Oh." She looked up. "Right, of course."
I should leave it at that. Get up, go back to work, stop whatever this is before it gets complicated. I have enough on my plate with the research, with Satoru acting weird, with everything else. The last thing I need is to get involved with—
My hand brushed against the crumpled paper in my coat pocket. That flyer some art student had thrust into my hands this morning at the campus entrance, just like they did to everyone else rushing past. 
"Actually, there's this art exhibition next weekend at the city gallery."
What the hell am I doing?
She blinked at me, her coffee cup frozen halfway to her mouth. "Are you... are you asking me to go to an art exhibition?"
This is stupid. I don't even like art exhibitions. They're crowded and pretentious, and I have better things to do with my weekend. Like work. Or sleep. Or literally anything else. I'm really not quite myself lately.
"I mean, if you want to. I don't understand much about art, but—" I rubbed the back of my neck. "If you show me what to look for, I'm sure I'll like it."
That sounded so lame. Why am I even doing this?
"You mean that?" she asked. "Because you don't have to pretend to be interested in art just because I—"
"I want to," I cut her off. "Besides, maybe you can explain to me why people pay millions for paintings of soup cans."
She laughed, that genuine, unguarded sound from the bar, and I was glad I hadn't thrown the flyer away. "Those are Warhol, and they're actually a commentary on mass production and consumer culture in—" She stopped herself, cheeks flushing. "And I'm doing it again."
"Saturday at 6?" I asked.
"Yeah," she said softly. "Saturday at 6 sounds good."
As I stood to leave, the absurdity of the situation hit me. Here I was, voluntarily signing up for an afternoon of art appreciation. What was wrong with me? 
The closest thing to art in my apartment is that anatomy poster Satoru got me as a joke last Christmas. If he ever found out about this, I'd never hear the end of it. But somehow, I couldn't bring myself to care.
It wasn't until I was back in my office at the university, staring at a stack of research papers, that I realized something strange — I hadn't smoked since morning. My usual lunchtime cigarette break had come and gone without me even noticing. 
My pack sat untouched in my coat pocket. I pulled it out now, turning it over in my hands, and somehow I found myself oddly looking forward to learning about soup cans.
─────── ౨ৎ ───────
(note: s&c reader)
The lecture went fine. It always did.
Talk about neurons, synapses, action potentials. Watch sleepy med students pretend to take notes while secretly checking their phones. Answer the same questions I'd answered a hundred times before. Rinse and repeat.
Now, hours later, I was back in the lab. The chaos from this morning had been methodically cleaned away. New solutions mixed, properly this time. Everything in its place, color-coded and labeled with my precise handwriting.
The lab was quiet at this hour. Just the soft hum of equipment and the occasional footsteps in the hallway outside. It was peaceful, in its own way. Or maybe just lonely.
I checked my watch — 5:47 PM. I should probably head home, but then what? Watch some mindless TV show? Read another research paper? Order takeout that would sit in my fridge until it went bad? God, when did my life become this predictable?
The solution in front of me turned the correct shade of blue this time. Finally. I made a note in my lab book, but my mind wandered. About Satoru's strange behavior. About her. About how she looked at Satoru like he hung the moon and stars just for her.
I pushed away from the bench so forcefully my chair squeaked against the floor. My hands were already reaching for my cigarettes before I made it to the window. The night air was cool against my face as I lit up, inhaling deeply.
This was exactly what I didn't need to think about. Not now. Not ever. Focus on the research. On the failed experiments. On anything else but the ache that threatened to consume me whenever I let my mind wander in her direction.
The cigarette burned down too quickly. I lit another one immediately. What kind of person fell for their best friend's girlfriend? What kind of friend was I to even—
No. Stop that train of thought right there.
The smoke curled up into the night sky, hoping it would carry with it all the things I couldn't let myself feel. All the words I couldn't say. All the moments I'd had to watch them together, pretending my heart wasn't being torn to shreds. I'm pathetic.
I exhaled another cloud of smoke into the night air. Maybe that was why I asked about the art exhibition. God knew I could use the distraction. From the research, from Satoru, from her.
And she — there was something in her eyes. That familiar look of someone drowning in circumstances they couldn't control. She needed a break too, probably more than she admitted. Maybe this Chad was partly responsible. Speaking of Chad—
I tapped my cigarette against the windowsill. It wouldn't be hard to figure out his real name. Law firms kept records of their interns, and with his father being a partner. One quick search in the hospital database and I could probably find something interesting in his medical history. Everyone had secrets. Maybe something embarrassing. Something that would make him think twice about—
What the hell am I thinking? I stubbed out my cigarette, leaving a black smear. Great. Now I'm contemplating abusing my position to dig up dirt on some spoiled law intern. Real professional, Suguru. Really living up to that ethical conduct seminar.
Though the thought of his smug face when he tried to take credit for her work—
No. Absolutely not. I'm better than that.
I lit another cigarette, trying to ignore how satisfying the idea was. I leaned back in my chair, staring at the ceiling. Saturday at 6.
At least that was something to look forward to. Something normal. Well, as normal as anything could be when you were a neurosurgeon voluntarily going to an art exhibition with a law student who was also your patient, technically. What did people even wear to art exhibitions?
My pen tapped against the lab book as my phone buzzed.
[2:34 PM] s&c reader: Need any help in the lab today? I can come in if you want.
[2:35 PM] Me: Just boring prep work left. Take the day off.
Three dots appeared, then disappeared. Then appeared again.
[2:37 PM] s&c reader: You sure? I can help with the prep too.
[2:37 PM] Me: Rest. Doctor's orders.
[2:40 PM] s&c reader: I hate when you say that.
I found myself smiling at my phone, picturing her frustrated face as she typed that. She was probably pouting right now, hunched over her textbooks in the library, annoyed that I'd pulled rank. That stubborn set of her jaw when she tried not to admit defeat. Just like him.
The smile faded as quickly as it had come. I immediately set my phone down and took a deep breath. I should be thinking about the research. About tumor markers and treatment protocols. Not about my student who was probably still in the library despite my orders to rest.
No. Not about her at all.
I glanced at my phone again, fighting the urge to text her back. Focus, I told myself. Work. Don't do anything stupid. God, this day really couldn't get any more fucking frustrating. 
─────── ౨ৎ ───────
(note: s&c reader)
The lab was quiet.
I'd been at this for hours, my eyes straining in the bright light of the laminar flow hood, my back aching from hunching over the bench. The familiar chemical smell of ethanol lingered in my nostrils from the endless rounds of sterilizing equipment. 
I straightened up, rolling my shoulders in a futile attempt to ease the knots. A glance at the clock told me it was late, far later than I'd intended to stay. 
The steady hum of the cell incubator behind me had become white noise hours ago, punctuated only by the occasional click of the temperature regulator. I was exhausted, ready to call it a night. But I couldn't leave, not yet.
There was still work to be done, still samples to process. The micropipette tips rattled in their box as I reached for another one, the sound sharp in the empty lab. My stomach rumbled in response. 
I sighed, tugging the elastic from my hair and running my fingers through the dark strands before twisting them back into a loose knot. A few pieces escaped, falling around my face as I looked over to the window, staring out at the darkening sky. 
The sun had already dipped below the horizon, the last streaks of orange fading into deep purple. The campus was quiet, most of the other staff and students long gone for the day.
My stomach growled again, reminding me that I hadn't eaten since lunch as I returned to work. I weighed my options—power through these last samples and face my empty fridge at home, or brave the vending machine downstairs for stale coffee and a questionable sandwich—
Then I heard the door open behind me. I didn't turn, couldn't turn, my hands still buried in the fragile work, the pipette cool in my gloved fingers. But then I heard her voice, and my heart stopped.
"Suguru?"
God, how I wanted to turn to her, to drink in the sight of her. But I couldn't, not yet.
"Hey," I replied, my gaze still fixed on the vials before me. "Didn't expect you here today. Sorry, the fun part's already over." I completed the transfer, then turned to face her, a easy smile on my lips. But the smile died as soon as I saw her face.
I didn't respond immediately, too startled by her appearance. Even in the dim light, it was impossible to miss.
She looked small, fragile in a way I had never seen before. Her eyes were red and swollen, her cheeks pale. She had been crying, that much was clear. She hugged herself tightly, as if she was trying to physically hold the pieces of herself together. 
Seeing her like that, so broken, tore at something deep inside me, something I hated, something fierce and aching.
"What happened?" 
The question was inevitable. But I already knew. There was only one thing, one person, that could make my pretty girl cry.
Her eyes were fixed on the floor, but I could see the tears welling up, threatening to spill over. "Can we work on something?" she finally asked, her voice small. "Please."
I hesitated, torn between the need to comfort her and the knowledge that it wasn't my place. "Do you want to talk about it?" I offered, even though I knew the answer before she even shook her head.
"No," she choked out. "I can't. I need—I need to focus on something else. Anything else. Or I think I'll fall apart."
I understood that feeling all too well. The need to lose yourself in work, to bury yourself in the familiar of the lab until the rest of the world faded away. But I hated that she felt it too, hated that he had driven her to this point. Hated him, with a fury that burned white-hot in my veins.
And the worst part was that I knew there was more, more that he was hiding from her. More lies, more secrets, more ways he was hurting her without her even knowing. And it made me want to scream, to rage, to tear him apart with my bare hands for daring to hurt her like this.
But I couldn't. All I could do was be here for her, in whatever way she needed me. 
"Please, Suguru." Her voice was pleading, desperate. "Can we just work?"
I hesitated for a moment longer, my gaze lingering on her face, taking in the vulnerability etched there. The urge to pull her into my arms, to hold her until the pain faded away, was almost overwhelming. But I knew I couldn't cross that line, not now, not like this.
Finally, I nodded and peeled off my gloves, setting them aside. I reached for her, gently undoing the tight knot of her crossed arms. Her hands were like ice in mine, trembling and fragile. I took one hand in both of mine, wishing I could take away her pain.
"What do you want to work on?" I asked softly, my thumb tracing soothing circles on the back of her hand.
"The nanoparticles," she said, her voice a little steadier. "We still need to narrow down the potential materials and targeting ligands, right?"
"Yeah," I said, forcing a smile. "Anything you want."
Anything for you. 
The words echoed in my mind, a bitter reminder of the truth I could never speak aloud. I loved her, had loved her for longer than I cared to admit, but she was with Satoru. And no matter how much it hurt to see her like this, to know that he was the one who had caused her pain, I couldn't let my own feelings get in the way.
So I pushed them down, buried them deep, and focused on the work. On being the friend she needed, the partner she could rely on. Even if it meant ignoring the part of me that screamed for something more. Even if it meant watching her break, again and again, and being powerless to stop it.
We worked in silence for a while, the familiar routine of the lab providing distraction. For her. For me. She focused intently on the task at hand, her brow furrowed as she carefully prepared the samples. Like everything she did, with unwavering precicion.
I watched her out of the corner of my eye, my heart aching at the tension in her shoulders, the tightness around her eyes. 
Time seemed to slip away as we lost ourselves in the work, the outside world fading away. I caught myself stealing glances at her, watching how her hair fell forward when she leaned over the samples. Every little gesture a knife to my heart. 
These moments were the hardest — seeing her so close, yet having to maintain this careful distance. Watching her push herself to exhaustion, knowing I couldn't hold her, couldn't comfort her the way I desperately wanted to.
I averted my gaze and glanced at the clock, just now realizing how late it had gotten.
"Hey," I said softly, breaking the silence. "It's nearly midnight. We should probably call it a day."
She looked up, blinking as if coming out of a trance. "Oh, no I have to finsish this first." She looked over to me and my stern gaze must have silenced her objections.
I hesitated for a moment, then reached out and touched her arm gently, ignoring the way my skin burned at the contact. "Come on. I want to show you something."
She followed reluctantly as I led her to the far corner of the lab, where our old microscope sat — the one we rarely used anymore since getting the newer models. I pulled out a worn slide from the cabinet.
"Remember this?" I asked, setting up the microscope. "From your first week here?"
She leaned in to look, and I had to force myself to step back. "Oh god, my first attempt at cell staining. It's horrible."
"Actually," I said, adjusting the focus, "look at this part here." I pointed to a small cluster of cells. "See how you managed to isolate that specific population? Most students take months to get that kind of precision. You did it on your first try."
She was quiet for a moment, studying the slide. A look I adored so much. And for a moment, the pain and hurt seemed to fade away. 
"You've got instincts that can't be taught," I continued. "That's why you're going to crack this nanoparticle puzzle too."
"You really think so?"
"I know so." I pulled out another slide. "Here, look at your work from last month. See how far you've come?"
She studied it for a moment, then shook her head. "It's still not perfect, the staining could be cleaner, the resolution better. I should be doing better by now."
"You're being too hard on yourself." Always chasing perfection, just like him. "You can't expect to master everything in a few months. Even Satoru took years to—" I caught myself, watching her shoulders tense at his name. Wrong thing to say. "What I mean is, you're already exceeding everyone's expectations. Except maybe your own."
She fell quiet, turning back to the microscope. I watched as she adjusted the focus. Finally, she straightened up from the microscope, turning to face me, and there it was — that spark in her eyes I'd grown to love, the one that made my heart stutter every time.
"We should try adjusting the polymer composition," she said suddenly. "Maybe if we modified the surface charge—"
I smiled, relief flooding through me at seeing that spark return. "Whatever you want to try. I'm right here with you. But tomorrow, okay? After a bit of sleep."
"Thank you," she said softly, leaning back in her chair and stretching her arms above her head. A small yawn escaped her. "Sorry for taking up so much of your time. You must have been here for hours."
"No, not at all," I lied, watching as she rolled her shoulders to work out the stiffness. In truth, I'd been at the lab since dawn, but she didn't need to know that.
I swallowed hard, my heart suddenly racing. "You know I'm always here for you. No matter what."
We remained silent for a moment, the weight of everything unsaid crowded in my throat — how much I cared, how seeing her hurt made me want to tear the world apart, how every smile she gave me was torture.
"Come on," I said finally, breaking the spell before I could do something stupid. "Let's get out of here. I think we both need some sleep."
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(note: s&c reader)
Cold autumn air burned in my lungs as I pushed myself harder, feet pounding against the leaf-strewn path. A thick blanket of mist hung low between the trees on my usual morning run, though nothing about this morning felt usual.
I hadn't slept. How could I?
Every time I closed my eyes, I saw her face. The way she looked so small, so broken. The tears she tried to hide. The trembling in her hands as we worked. The memory of those words made me stumble, my running shoes skidding on wet leaves, made my chest tight with something painful.
I picked up my pace, as if I could somehow outrun the guilt of my own thoughts. Because every time I saw her like this, a treacherous part of me whispered, I would never make you cry. I would never give you reason to doubt yourself. I would cherish every brilliant, imperfect moment.
Damn it.
I'm a terrible friend. To both of them.
The park was almost empty at this hour — just a few other early risers and their dogs. A jogger passed, giving me a brief nod. It was my routine, something that usually helped clear my head, but not today. Not when I couldn't stop thinking about how she looked last night, working herself to escape whatever he'd done this time.
What kind of man watches the woman he loves hurt like this and does nothing? Someone so passionate, so full of life, slowly dimming because he can't get his shit together—
Stop it. Stop thinking about her like that.
I stopped abruptly, hands on my knees, breathing hard. A cloud of vapor formed with each exhale, disappearing into the cold morning air. My t-shirt was soaked with sweat despite the chill.
This isn't my business. I've told myself this a hundred times. Their relationship, their problems — none of it concerns me. I'm just her professor. Her research partner. Just his friend. But friends don't let friends destroy the people they claim to love.
And I can't keep pretending I don't see what's happening. Can't keep watching her slowly break apart while he—
Before I knew what I was doing, I was heading back to my car. To hell with my day off. To hell with staying out of it. I've watched this play out for too long, kept my mouth shut for too long. Sorry, Satoru. But we need to talk.
I stormed through the university hallways, my footsteps thundering off the walls, still in my damp training clothes that clung uncomfortably to my skin. The lab door was ahead, and through the window I could see him.
Satoru was sitting in his chair, staring blankly at the whiteboard where incoherent scribbles were scattered, just like yesterday.
In two strides, I crossed the room and grabbed the back of his chair, spinning it around to face me. He looked awful — pale, unshaven, his hair a mess. The sharp scent of coffee couldn't mask something else on his breath. His eyes were bloodshot. I didn't care.
"What the hell did you say to her?" I snapped.
Satoru didn't even seem surprised by my presence. "Wow, that's a pretty broad question, don't you think?"
"Cut the bullshit, Satoru. You know exactly what I'm talking about."
He glanced up then, one eyebrow arched, that infuriatingly casual look I'd seen a thousand times before. "Damn, Suguru. Who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?"
Something snapped inside me. Before I could think better of it, I was there, hands gripping the arms of his chair, caging him in. Close enough to see the muscle working in his jaw. "I'm gonna ask you this one time and one time only. What happened between you two?"
"Wow, you're really close." He glanced pointedly at the narrow space between us, but I caught the way his fingers tightened on the armrest. "We had a disagreement, that's all," he added, his tone dismissive.
"A disagreement?" The laugh that escaped me was harsh. I pushed away from his chair, turning so I wouldn't have to look at him. My hand scraped roughly across my face, trying my best not to take a hit on him. "She was in tears, Satoru. She could barely get the words out."
He didn't answer. Just straightened up, brushed imaginary dirt from his lab coat. Then he was on his feet, moving past me to the whiteboard as if I wasn't even there. As if we weren't having this conversation.
He picked up a marker, adding to the chaos of scribbles already there — equations that went nowhere, diagrams that made no sense.
"God, would you just—" I ran a hand through my hair in frustration. "You can't just ignore this, Satoru."
His knuckles went white around the marker. For a second, I thought he might actually turn around and hit me.
"How long are you gonna keep doing this to her?" I pressed. "Until she breaks completely?"
"You think I'm not aware of that," he muttered, still facing the board.
"Then fucking stop. If you can't treat her right, just let her go."
That got him. He spun around, eyes hard. "Oh, you'd love that, wouldn't you?"
I blinked, taken aback. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Satoru laughed, but there was no humor in it. "Come on, Suguru. Don't act like you haven't been waiting for this. Waiting for your chance."
"That's not—" The words stuck in my throat. "This isn't about me."
"No?" He took a step closer. "Then what is it about? Why do you care so much?"
"Because she deserves better than this. And you know it."
"Better? You mean like you?" His lips curled into something cruel. "Too bad she's not yours to care about, huh? Even though you think you'd be so much better for her than me." He tilted his head, eyes cold. "Funny, isn't it? She doesn't want you, even knowing how bad I am for her. What does that say about you?"
The words hit like a physical blow, each word a serrated edge twisting in my gut. It took everything in me not to grab him by the throat. "You're being a dick."
"And you're being a lying piece of shit. When were you gonna tell me?" His voice dropped dangerously low. "About how you feel about her?"
"This isn't about me," I repeated through gritted teeth. "This is about what you're doing to her."
"You don't know anything about us."
I stepped closer, close enough to see the shadows under his eyes. "What happens when she finds out the truth, huh? When you're passed out in some hospital bed? That how you want her to learn about it?"
Something flickered in his eyes — pain, maybe guilt — but it was gone in an instant.
"Stay out of it," he said, his voice cold. "Just... stay out of it."
He turned back to the board. I watched him, this man I'd known my whole life, suddenly feeling like a stranger.
"What happened to you?" I asked quietly.
He didn't turn around. "Yeah," he said, his voice heavy. "Guess we'd all like to know, wouldn't we?"
I watched him scribble new, illogical equations on the whiteboard, this stranger wearing my best friend's face, and for a moment I saw echoes of who we used to be.
Late nights in the university library, surrounded by towers of medical textbooks. Satoru falling asleep on his notes, drooling on diagrams of the nervous system while I threw paper balls at his head to wake him up. The way we'd quiz each other until sunrise, high on caffeine and the shared dream of becoming surgeons.
Our residency years, which were nothing but brutal and endless. Sleeping in on-call rooms, stealing each other's coffee, covering for each other when we were dead on our feet. Learning to navigate the maze of hospital politics together. 
The rush of our first successful surgeries, the crushing weight of our first losses.
Even when things got bad, when the pressure started getting to him, when the pills became more than just a way to stay focused during exam season, he never shut me out completely. He'd show up at my door at 3 AM, shaking and sweating, and I'd let him in without a word. We'd sit in silence until the sun came up, until he could breathe again.
I was there through all of it. The interventions, the relapses, the promises to get clean. The nights when he'd call me, voice slurred, talking about how he didn't know how to go on. I'd talk him down, drive across town to pick him up from whatever hole he'd crawled into. 
We were brothers in everything but blood.
But now—
Now he stood there, shoulders rigid, adding meaningless equations to an already chaotic board. The gap between us felt wider than the few feet of lab floor. When did that happen? When did we stop being able to tell each other everything?
Was it when she came into our lives? When he fell in love with her? When I—
No. It was before that. The distance had been growing for a while, so gradually I hardly noticed. Like watching someone drift away on an outgoing tide, too slow to notice until they're already too far to reach.
The marker squeaked against the whiteboard. The sound grated on my nerves, like everything about him did these days. His secrets, his dismissive attitude, the way he kept everyone at arm's length while slowly self-destructing.
"Do you remember," I found myself saying, "that night in our second year of residency? When that kid crashed on my table?"
His hand stilled on the board.
"I was a mess afterward. Convinced I'd missed something, that it was my fault. You came to my place and we sat on the floor until morning, going over every detail of the surgery until I finally believed that I couldn't have saved him."
He didn't turn around, but I saw his shoulders tense.
"What happened to us, Satoru?"
The marker dropped from his hand, clattering against the metal tray. The sound echoed in the quiet lab.
"I don't know" he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper, "I'm tired of it all."
We stood there, two people who had once finished each other's sentences, now unable to find the right words. Silence stretched, thick and suffocating, filled with twenty years of shared history that suddenly felt meaningless.
I wanted to grab him, shake him, make him see what he was doing to himself. To her. To us. But I stayed where I was, the distance between us feeling more insuperable by the second. 
This strange, hollow feeling in my chest — was this what growing apart felt like? This gradual realization that the person standing before me, had become someone I didn't recognize?
But the details were still there—the slight crook in his nose from that basketball accident in high school with him, laughing it off even as blood dripped onto his jersey—the white line across his knuckles from that fight behind the gym, my own fists aching as I pulled him away—the small scar above his eyebrow from when we tried to climb that tree in sixth grade, both of us sworn to secrecy, telling our parents we fell off our bikes. 
Every mark told a story I could recite in my sleep, yet somehow, they all added up to someone I didn't know anymore. Like looking at a familiar photograph that had been subtly altered — all the pieces were there, but the picture was wrong.
My best friend, my brother, the person who knew me better than anyone — when did he become such a stranger? When did our comfortable silences turn into this suffocating void? 
The thought sat like lead in my stomach, bitter and cold, as I realized that sometimes knowing every scar on someone's skin doesn't mean you know what's beneath it anymore.
─────── ౨ৎ ───────
(note: s&c and r&r reader)
Days blurred together in a haze of surgeries and lectures. 
I went through the motions, my hands steady as ever in the operating room, my voice clear during presentations. To anyone watching, I was the picture of professional composure. But inside? I don't know.
I thought I was doing a decent job of holding it together until one of my students approached me after a practically grueling morning lecture. The young man clutched a stack of papers, a sheen of sweat glistening on his forehead.
"Dr. Geto, about my thesis proposal—"
I cut him off with a wave of my hand, not even looking up from gathering my materials. "Email me to request thesis mentorship. I'll review your proposal and get back to you."
"Oh... you're, ehm, already my thesis advisor. We had an appointment scheduled for today."
I froze, finally looking at the student—really looking at him. Recognition dawned slowly, followed by a wave of shame. Takada Jun, one of my most promising students. We'd met twice a month since the semester began. Damn it.
"You're right," I said. "Sorry, can we reschedule?"
I was better than this. More professional than this. But lately, everything felt like it was slipping through my fingers.
The research lab was closed for the week—a "cooling off period," Yaga had called it. I knew what it really meant. We were all too volatile, too raw from recent events to work together effectively. So I went home early, something I never did.
My apartment felt emptier than usual, the silence pressing in from all sides. I tried reading, but the words swam before my eyes. I attempted to eat, but everything tasted like ash. Even my usual evening cigarette was bitter and harsh in my lungs.
My thoughts kept drifting to Satoru, wondering what he was doing, not if he was using, only what cocktail of pills he'd chosen this time. The math was easy enough—one to stay awake, two to fall asleep, three to numb the edges, repeat as needed. I'd seen it too many times before.
I crushed out my cigarette, watching the ember die. I reached for another only to find an empty pack. Figured. I should go buy more, knew I'd need them if I let myself think about her, about them. But I didn't want to leave the apartment, couldn't put on real clothes.
My only glimpse of light was the art exhibition on Saturday. The thought of it made something in my chest loosen, just slightly. I pulled out my phone, staring at our last exchange of messages before typing out a new one.
[6:45 PM] Me: Should I pick you up for the exhibition?
Her response came quickly.
[6:47 PM] Attorney: Let's meet there. I might be running late from a study group.
[6:47 PM] Me: Sounds good.
I hesitated, then added.
[6:48 PM] Me: Looking forward to it.
[6:49 PM] Attorney: Me too :)
A small smile tugged at my lips. For a brief, ridiculous moment, I wondered if I should bring flowers. The thought made me pause, my hand reaching automatically for my cigarettes before remembering the empty pack. What the hell was I doing?
This was wrong on so many levels.  She was my patient. Well, technically Satoru's patient. And young—god, she was so young. And I was... what? A mess of a man carrying a torch for someone I could never have, trying to fill that void with someone else? I was not sure.
My mind kept drifting back to that night at the bar. The way she felt pressed against me in that dimly lit bathroom, her skin warm under my touch. The soft sounds she made when I slipped my fingers inside her—God, I shouldn't be thinking about this.
This was getting pathetic. Still. Saturday couldn't come fast enough.
─────── ౨ৎ ───────
(note: r&r reader)
I was late. Damn it, I was so late.
The emergency surgery had gone longer than expected—a complex arteriovenous malformation that refused to behave. By the time I closed, my hands were cramping and my neck was stiff from hours of hunching over the microscope. But the patient would live, and that's what mattered.
Still, as I rushed through the hospital parking lot, yanking off my scrub cap and shoving it in my pocket, I couldn't help but check my watch again. Two hours late. Shit. I'd texted her updates throughout, but still. Two hours.
The art exhibition was being held in some converted warehouse space downtown. Even from outside, I could see the warm light spilling onto the street through the large windows, hear the soft sound of voices and clinking glasses. I paused at the entrance, trying to catch my breath and compose myself.
That's when I spotted it—a small splash of red on my shirt sleeve, barely visible but unmistakably blood. Perfect. Because showing up late wasn't bad enough, I had to show up looking like I'd just walked off a crime scene.
I quickly shrugged my jacket back on, tugging the sleeves down to cover the stain. It would have to do.
She was standing alone near a large abstract painting, wine glass in hand, studying the canvas. Even in a room full of people, she seemed somehow apart from it all. The sight of her there all by herself felt like fingers wrapping around my heart.
"I am so, so sorry," I said as I approached, placing my hand on her lower back.
She turned, and the smile that lit up her face made my stomach flip. How could she look at me like that when I'd kept her waiting for two hours?
"Hey, you made it!" She didn't sound angry at all. If anything, she seemed genuinely happy to see me. It only made the guilt weigh heavier in my chest.
"I'm really sorry," I repeated, because apparently that's all I could say. "The surgery took longer than expected. There were complications and—"
"Did you save them?"
I blinked, caught off guard by the directness of her question. "Yes."
"Then stop apologizing." She took a sip of her wine, her eyes twinkling. "Besides, fashionably late is totally in right now."
"Two hours isn't fashionably late, it's just rude."
"It's your job," she said simply. "Saving lives tends to take priority over art exhibitions."
I watched her for a second longer, unsure how to react. "Have you been here alone this whole time?"
"Yeah, but it's fine," she said, waving off my concern. "I've actually had time to explore everything properly. Plus, the wine is decent."
Guilt twisted in my stomach. I pictured her wandering these halls alone, checking her phone for my updates, making awkward small talk with strangers. For two hours.
"I really am—"
"If you apologize one more time, I swear I’ll spill this wine on your jacket. And you know me—I don’t need much of an excuse to be clumsy." Before I could respond, her eyes narrowed, focusing on something near my collar. "Is that?"
I followed her gaze to where my jacket had shifted, revealing the telltale red stain. Damn it. I quickly tried to adjust my jacket, but she caught my arm, stopping me.
"Sorry," I muttered. "I'm a mess. I should have gone home to change first, but I didn't want to be any later than I already was."
"Hey," she said, leaning in conspiratorially, "if anyone asks, we'll just tell them it's paint. I mean, we are at an art exhibition. Who's going to look too closely?"
Despite myself, I laughed. "You'd make a terrible witness in court, you know that?"
"Good thing I'm going to be a lawyer then, not a witness." She grinned. "Come on, I want to show you my favorite pieces. And maybe we can find you a painting with enough red in it to stand near. You know, for cover."
I let her lead me through the gallery, and I found myself placing my hand on the small of her back. It was an unconscious gesture, one I immediately second-guessed, but she leaned into the touch slightly. So I let my hand stay where it was.
"You're not still feeling guilty about being late, are you?" she asked suddenly, glancing up at me.
"Maybe a little."
She rolled her eyes. "Well, stop it. Although—" She pretended to think for a moment. "You could make it up to me by buying me another glass of wine."
"Done," I said immediately. "Although maybe I shouldn't be encouraging drinking."
"Oh, now you're being a doctor again?"
"Force of habit."
She laughed, the sound warm and genuine, wrapping around me like summer rain. Dangerous, how easily I could get used to that sound. She led me further through the gallery, linking her arm through mine, chattering away about everything and nothing. 
It was fascinating how much she knew—not just about the art itself, but about the whole scene. She'd point to a painting and launch into stories about the artist's infamous feuds with gallery owners, or how someone's entire series was inspired by a bad breakup with another artist three rooms over. 
She knew every bit of gossip, every drama. Which curator was sleeping with which artist, which pieces were painted during mental breakdowns, which collections were secretly commentary on messy divorces. She made the plain white walls of the gallery come alive with her stories.
"Oh, and that guy over there?" She nodded discretely towards a man in an expensive-looking suit. "He's actually—"
I caught myself staring at her again, watching the way her eyes lit up as she spoke, the subtle changes in her expression as she moved from one story to the next. The way she'd lower her voice when sharing particularly bits of details, leaning closer to me like we were sharing secrets.
It was strange. I never knew that art was so... fun. Her excitement was contagious, and I found myself being pulled into her world without resistance.
"You're not even looking at the painting anymore," she accused, catching me staring at her instead of the canvas she was discussing.
"Sorry," I said, trying to focus on the painting she'd been discussing. "You were saying something about the use of negative space?"
She launched back into her explanation, describing techniques and influences I barely understood. But there was something captivating about her, the way she could find something fascinating in every piece, even the ones she claimed to hate.
I couldn't help myself. I had to ask.
"Why law?"
She blinked, caught off guard by the sudden change in topic. "What?"
"You're clearly passionate about art. You know all these techniques, all this history. Why aren't you studying art instead of law?"
Her smile faltered slightly. "We've had this conversation before, remember? Stability, good career, making my parents proud—"
"But that's what your parents want. What do you want?"
She was quiet for a moment, her fingers playing with the stem of her wine glass. When she finally spoke, her voice was soft, almost resigned. "It's not that simple."
"It could be."
She looked up at me then, something flashing in her eyes that might have been anger. "Says the successful neurosurgeon who followed his passion."
"That's different—"
"Is it?" She took a sip of wine and pulled her arm away from mine, the loss of contact unexpectedly cruel. "You chose medicine because you loved it, right? Because you couldn't imagine doing anything else?"
I thought about Satoru, about following his lead into neurosurgery, about all the complicated reasons behind my choices. "It's... not that simple either."
"Exactly." She gave me a knowing look. "Life rarely is."
We stood there in silence for a moment, both lost in thought. Around us, the gallery filled with the white noise of clinking glasses and polite laughter.
"I'm sorry," I began. "I shouldn't have said that."
She shook her head, loose strands of hair catching the light. "No, it's... you're not wrong to ask. It's just complicated." She paused, staring into her wine glass. My parents worked so hard to put me through school. Dad worked double shifts at the factory, Mom cleaned houses on weekends. They saved every penny they could."
"They were so proud when I got into law school," she continued, her voice softer now. "You should have seen their faces. Dad actually cried—I'd never seen him cry before. They threw this little party in our apartment, invited all the neighbors. Mom made this huge spread of food even though I know they couldn't really afford it."
She smiled at the memory, but there was something bittersweet in it. "They see law school as this—this ticket to a better life, you know? This chance for their daughter to have everything they couldn't give themselves. How could I tell them I'd rather spend my days covered in paint?"
"They sound like good parents."
"The best," she agreed. "That's why it's so hard. Every time I think about changing paths, I remember how much they've sacrificed. The hours they worked, the things they went without. Dad's still picking up extra shifts to help with my expenses, even though I tell him not to."
She turned to look at a nearby painting, but I could tell she wasn't really seeing it. "Sometimes I calculate how much they've invested in my education, down to the last yen. It feels like a responsibility, you know." A pause. "So I'm—acting. Playing dress-up in these fancy suits, pretending to care about corporate law and international trade agreements. But it's okay."
Her story settled like lead in my stomach. Here I was, someone who'd never had to watch his parents sacrifice anything, presuming to give advice about following dreams. And suddenly, I felt almost ashamed of my own privilege. 
I grew up never wanting for anything. My parents had well-paying jobs and valued education above all else. Private tutors, college prep courses, academic summer programs—they spared no expense in paving my path to success.
When I decided to go into medicine, my biggest concern had been whether I was doing it for myself or just following Satoru's lead. Not whether I could afford it. Not whether it would drain my family's savings.
I'd never had to work during university. Never had to count pennies for textbooks. Never had to weigh the cost of pursuing my dreams against my family's needs. The academic world had been my playground, every door already half-open. I feel so dump.
Sure, medical school had been demanding. The long hours of study, the grueling residency, the constant pressure to excel—but I'd never had to wonder if I could afford to chase my passion. Never had to choose between my dreams and my family's financial stability.
I lived in a nice apartment, drove a decent car, could afford my vices without a second thought. And here she was, brilliant and passionate, having to bury her dreams because she couldn't bear to waste her parents' years of hard work.
Looking at her now, in this gallery surrounded by art she understood so deeply, I could see the weight of those unrealized dreams in the way she held herself. In how her eyes lingered on each painting a bit too long, like she was trying to capture a piece of what could have been.
"I hope you get to paint someday," I said finally, the words feeling inadequate. "The way you want to. Not just alone in your apartment, but really paint. Show your work. Be the artist you clearly are inside."
She looked up at me, surprise flickering across her face. Then her gaze dropped to her wine glass, her fingers tightening around the stem. A strand of hair fell forward, and she pushed it back with unsure fingers.
"I mean it," I continued, resisting the urge to brush that stubborn strand of hair back myself. "Besides, who says you can't have both? Practice law until you're stable enough to pursue art. Or find a way to combine them—art law is a thing, isn't it?"
"You're awfully supportive, for someone who barely knows me," she said quietly, the words half-muffled by her wine glass.
"Is that such a bad thing?"
She shook her head, blinking rapidly. "No, I just... I'm not used to people understanding. Everyone else just talks about being practical, about growing up and facing reality. Like art is somehow childish."
The last words came out bitter, and without thinking, I reached out to touch her chin, tilting her face up to meet my gaze. Her skin was warm under my fingers, and I could feel her pulse flutter at the contact.
"Art isn't childish," I said firmly. "Neither is wanting to pursue something that you're passionate about. That's actually pretty brave."
Something shifted in her expression then, a softness I hadn't seen before. We stood there for a moment, her eyes locked with mine. That's when I finally realized I was still cupping her chin, my thumb absently brushing against her skin. I quickly dropped my hand.
"I really want to see them." The words slipped out before I could stop them. "Your paintings, I mean." 
It felt too intimate, too presumptuous. Like I was asking to see more than just her art, but something deeper, more personal. But she just smiled, a real smile this time, reaching up to tuck that persistent strand of hair behind her ear.
"Okay," she said. "If you promise not to judge too harshly."
"I already know they're great," I said softly, surprising myself with how much I meant it. "I don't know much about art, but I know they're great because you painted them." Then my phone buzzed in my pocket. My heart nearly stopped when I saw the caller ID.
I took an instinctive step back from her. "I'm sorry, I need to take this," I said, already bringing the phone to my ear. "Hello?"
There was silence on the other end, just soft breathing that I knew too well. Then, "Suguru?"
Something in her voice made my chest tighten. She sounded—lost. Different from her usual self. Gone was that fierce confidence, that spark that made her so much like Satoru. Instead, she sounded small, fragile.
"Hey," I said softly. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah, I just—" A pause. "I don't even know why I'm calling."
Someone laughed loudly behind me. She must have heard it through the phone because she hesitated. "Sorry, are you out somewheret? I don't want to—"
"No, no," I said quickly, probably too quickly. "It's fine. Really. Talk to me. What's going on?"
I was painfully aware of the her standing nearby, pretending to study a painting while obviously trying not to listen. I caught her eye briefly, gesturing that I needed a moment. She nodded, with an understanding in her eyes that somehow made it worse.
I quickly made my way to the entrance where the coats hung, seeking somewhere quieter. She was quiet for so long I thought she might have hung up. Then, in a small voice that didn't sound like her at all, "Is he okay?"
I didn't need to ask who she meant.
"He's okay," I said, even though I wasn't really convincing either of us. "You know Satoru. He's managing."
A soft laugh, maybe a sob. "That could mean anything with him."
"No, really. He's okay," I lied. "I'm keeping an eye on him."
A pause then, "I'm being stupid, aren't I?"
"No," I said. "You're not being stupid. You're in love." The words hurt to say, but they were true. "That's never stupid."
Another shaky breath. "I shouldn't have called. You're out, and I'm here just—"
"Hey, do you need me?" I cut in. "I can bring you something. Coffee? Food? Those terrible convenience store onigiri you pretend not to like?"
That got a real laugh, albeit a watery one. "No, I'm... I'm actually at Maki's. She dragged me out. Said I needed to stop rotting in my apartment."
"Good. That's... that's good." I ran a hand through my hair, not quite believing her. I knew her too well by now, knew she was probably curled up alone in her apartment, just as I knew she knew I was lying about Satoru being okay. Strange, how we'd both gotten so comfortable with these little deceptions. "But the offer stands. Anytime."
"Thank you, Suguru." Her voice was softer now.
"Yeah," was all I could manage. I closed my eyes, pressing the phone harder against my ear as if I could somehow keep her there longer.  Each second of silence felt like another chance to say something, anything, to make this right. But what could I say? That I was sorry? That I missed her? That I thought about her every damn day?
"I should let you get back," she said. "To wherever you are. Sorry for—"
"Don't apologize. Not to me. Never to me."
I took a deep breath, briefly pulling the phone away from my ear because I couldn't trust my voice not to say what I desperately wanted to. Don't go. Stay on the line. Let me fix this. But I had no right to ask that of her. Not anymore. Maybe never did.
After we hung up, I stood there in the gallery's entrance, frozen. Around me, couples laughed and gathered their coats, heading out into the night. The door kept opening and closing, letting in bursts of cold air inside, reminding me I needed to move, needed to go back.
When I finally made my way back to her, she was studying the same stormy seascape from earlier. She didn't turn around immediately, giving me a moment to compose myself. Maybe it was some sort of kindness on her part.
She didn't ask about the call. Didn't question my sudden disappearance or the tension I knew was in every fiber of my being. Instead, she just glanced at me with a small smile that somehow made everything both better and worse, and said, "I think we've seen everything. Should we head out?"
The relief nearly knocked me sideways. "You sure? There's still the upper floor—"
"Please," she said. "I've been here for hours. I could probably give tours at this point."
I watched her gather her things, struck by how carefully she was moving around the weight of what had just happened. Like she understood something about me that I hadn't expected her to grasp. 
"You're awfully understanding, you know that?"
She looked up at me. "Something we have in common, it seems."
We walked to the exit in silence. I helped her into her coat, her fingers brushing mine as she adjusted her collar. Outside, the night air was sharp with the bite of early autumn. She pulled her coat tighter around herself.
"I can call you a taxi," I offered.
"Actually," she said, "I think I'll walk." She looked up at the sky, where a few stubborn stars managed to shine through Tokyo's light pollution. "It's not far, and it's a nice night."
"Not a chance," I said, already pulling out my phone. "It's late."
"I'm a big girl, you know. I can handle myself."
"I'm sure you can," I replied, already dialing the taxi company. "But humor your doctor, will you?"
She rolled her eyes but didn't protest further. While we waited for the taxi, she stood close enough that I could smell her perfume, something light and floral, while I tried to ignore the guilt for leaving the exhibition early, guilt for being late, guilt for enjoying myself despite everything else.
"Thank you," I said suddenly. "For tonight."
"No problem, doc," she said with a warm smile. "Next time, maybe we can finish looking at the art."
"Next time," I echoed, like a promise I wasn't sure I should be making. The taxi pulled up, its yellow light cutting through the darkness. I opened the door for her. 
She turned before getting in, looking back over her shoulder. "Oh, and Suguru?" The use of my first name sent an unexpected shiver down my spine. "Don't overthink everything tonight, okay?"
I watched the taxi disappear into the flow of traffic, its red taillights blending with all the other lights of the city. Only then did I pull out my cigarettes, lighting one with slightly shaking hands. The night felt colder without her presence.
I took a long drag, watching the smoke disappear into the night air, then started walking in the opposite direction, no real destination in mind, just a vague hope that if I walked long enough, the conflicting feelings churning inside me might fade away. 
The city lights blurred around me, and somewhere in the distance, I could hear the last trains of the night rumbling through their stations.
Next time, she'd said. 
God help me, but I was already looking forward to it.
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author's note — hello again! i hope you enjoyed this chapter from suguru's pov. i'm sorry for the lack of updates lately, university life and low motivation can be a real challenge. but i'd love to hear your thoughts, so feel free to leave a comment or send in a message. i love to read them <3
& i hope his pov didn’t break your heart too much, especially with his and satoru’s spiraling friendship. also, this chapter ties back to ch 14 of symptoms and causes, for those who are following along.
pls consider subscribing to the story on ao3 or turning on notifications for my blog for furute updates (i've given up on taglists, to be honest).
and as always, thanks for reading, and i wish you all the best, whether you're reading this in the middle of the day or late at night :))
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