#honestly the lord of the flies stuff feels less like a reference and more like eli read that book and decided he wanted to do it irl. lol.

[mosscrab]

mgsv has so many literary references to books i have essays abt it kind of makes me.

[piracytheorist]

1/4 the thing about Donna is that it was after Claudia died that she was probably vulnerable enough to fall for the 'I adopt you as my child so now you have a family and i'll give you a 'gift'' shtick of Miranda's. Claudia died in 1996 aged 9 and was either her sister or her child. The Gardener says 'Mistress Donna' and 'Miss Claudia' so she was already head/last heir of the Beneviento estate.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that Claudia's death must have been the final hit for Donna. Losing her parents was one thing, but it's something all of us will have to deal with in our lives at some point (hopefully a late one). Losing a younger sibling/child when they're 9 is undoubtedly tragic. Considering Claudia's age I immediately assumed she was Donna's younger sister; I saw Donna as quite young herself, unless she was super young when she had Claudia, if Claudia is her child. But in any case, her death must have caused her even more distress, so it was the perfect situation for Miranda to swoop in and claim herself as Donna's "mother". Especially considering that Miranda's "gift" allowed Donna to create the perfect friend; Angie, the doll that was gifted to her by her father, and whose personality she could shape exactly the way she wanted.

2/4 as for nonaging+alcina, i raise you: her daughters. 3 young women were experimented on w cadou and as a result they were 3 amnesiac carnivorous swarms of flies that went back to looking pre-experiment. Then got adopted. And stayed looking like that for years up to the game's events. As for Heisenberg, he says 'decades of being forced to serve her' so shouldn't he have said 'my whole life' (he's dramatic/showman enough that he would have) or reference to lifelong slavery or 'MM raised us'?

Good point about the daughters! I hadn't even thought of them! But yeah iirc one of the diary notes you find in the game is dated at around 1958 or something, and it mentions Daniela, so all three of them were definitely there at least since then, non-aging and all. And I think though Alcina ended up adopting them, Miranda also oversaw the experimentation on them, so it's a good point towards proving that symbiosis with the Cadou pauses one's aging completely.

And yeah, Heisenberg would definitely be as dramatic as to say something like that, especially considering how oversharing he was about everything. It was like he was seeing Ethan run around his factory, being the only intelligent creature around that wasn't on Miranda's side, and he just unloaded all his burden because Ethan was the very first to be able to comprehend it and not rat him out to Miranda (who, ironically enough, already knew all about Heisenberg's wish to rebel against her). And Ethan was just like "Dude I honestly don't give a shit" XD

But yeah the way he says "She took me. Took us. To be her children." He sounds disgusted and like, he's rightfully so but the kind of disgust fits a bit more the idea of Miranda kidnapping a grown-ass man, experimenting on him with the hope of reviving her daughter through him, and when that failed she just claimed him as her "son". It sounds more like that and less like a rebellious son who, after growing up, realized what a fucked-up caretaker he had as a child.

3/4 MM had established herself/met Spencer/forbade people from going+getting anything from outside the village by the late 50s/early 60's that's why there are trucks and tvs and radios; and the Duke being the one to sell newspapers to villagers + being Karl's informant about bsaa+the stuff that happened in america (this is from the game director Sato who said heisenberg isn't a nazi and the fanservice of 'boulder punching asshole' here polygon . c o m / interviews / 22453564)

4/4 and now that i think more on it, MM just grabbed the last descendants of the most historically powerful houses, literally the founding ones (except alcina) to have even more influence within the village huh. timeline is wonky for sure. but then again all re canon is a bit wonky. Tumblr pls don't eat this one.

I honestly fucking love the design in the village because it's so well made to showcase that Miranda had cut off any connection from outside and inside the village. People on the outside didn't know it existed (aside from whoever it was in BSAA who made sure the mold man and his mold daughter would be relocated in driving distance to it and its leader with an obsession over a certain megamycete), and people on the inside were stuck with technology of mid-20th century and zero contact with the outside world. Even the Duke seems to adapt to it style-wise even though he obviously can contact the outside world.

And yeah, from the very little we see of the villagers, they seem to have felt very obedient to the Lords and Miranda, even though people like Elena were terrified of Castle Dimitrescu (with good reason!). And that probably was because Miranda made sure to have control over the right influences in the village.

Also, I love the phrase "the fanservice of "boulder-punching asshole'". Out of context it just sounds even more hilarious.

Thank goodness that I've taken to saving every ask in a txt bc my memory is bad. Next time I'll send shorter stuff like the friendly reminder+oppy+ethan and the hammer thing tho. You shouldn't have given me permission to ramble, now your inbox is mine, nyehehehe /joking

Honestly, I love getting your messages! I have a quick scroll through my activity every morning before work and I smiled every time I saw the notifications of your messages! Feel free to make yourself at home in my inbox :D

[tornrose24]

EtoCU IN SPACE! Thoughts and complaints (Spoilers!)

So I too decided to watch all the episodes of season 4 in one day. I had... mixed reactions. More so compared to other seasons. Here are my thoughts:

-I KNEW Krupp went to school in the 90s! Even better, they gave us an exact year on his yearbook! (1993 to be exact! That was the year ‘The Nightmare Before Christmas’ came out!)

-Krupp was less of an asshole and more of an idiot the entire season, wasn’t he? There were too many examples to list. To no one’s surprise, he did to take over more than once, but I’m glad it didn’t go anywhere.

-I liked that Moxie was the most realistic adult on the show to date. I also liked how she could barely stand Krupp and not even Fitzgibbons cared for him.

-I feel that George and Harold’s enthusiasm and history with adults did make things a lot harder when it came to listening to Moxie and Fitzgibbons.

-CU is WAY more competent in this season! Holy crap that was nice!

-Also the boys cried when they thought he died! That was sad, heartwarming, and harsher in hindsight all in one (These incarnations would NOT take it well if they had to go through book 12 or the movie).

-Melvin’s rapping was both hilarious and awesome!

-Him and Erica REALLY don’t want to be on the show anymore due to being fed up with the toilet humor, LOL. Oh boy I think they’d prefer She-Ra or Kipo and the age of Wonderbeasts in that case.

-I want to see Erica and Moxie hang out more. She seems like someone Erica would more than look up to.

-So does Sean Astin actually have a daughter?

-When they were dissing shows that took place in Space, I was thinking ‘Doctor Who is good’ before I saw that it was a fourth wall joke.

-That Hamilton reference was hilarious as is, but then someone hating the actor enough to hurl a fruit at him made me think of why its controversial at the moment (coincidence?)

-Having Krupp be part of the Misfarts was... unexpected. Funny, but unexpected.

-I KNEW we’d get a Planet of the Apes reference! But it went so fast.

-Oh George and Harold... if kids ruling things is a bad idea, wait until you read ‘Lord of the Flies.’

-We ended up getting a Passengers reference of all things. Unlike Passengers, it’s actually entertaining and not creepy. (Don’t watch Passengers–look up the plot to know why). I can’t believe Krupp thought that waking up the boys would be a good thing–he should have known better by that point. I would have been down for JUST him being awake, but what we got was funny.

Ok now for my complaints.

-SO MUCH WASTED POTENTIAL! Where were the aliens from the last few seasons?! And I don’t mean for that one gag! I thought they were going to play a part! What where the producers/writers thinking?!

-I was expecting Dupe Plicitous to be an alien in disguise. Sadly that would have made the show far more interesting compared to some of the things we got instead.

-Oh great, another new science teacher we get to know little about.

-It’s cool that we got to see Dressy as a bad guy, but not only did they make it way too obvious, but the boys drew her as the monster in the comic before they even knew. 

-So... Krupp actually.... he really did go in his space outfit, didn’t he? They ACTUALLY made that joke. 

-I have a few reasons as to why I think they cut this season short. But I now think that they could have done more episodes because we could have gone to another planet or two.

-Oh hey, it’s another ‘let’s show how much Krupp desires having a girlfriend while still refusing to bring in Edith’ gag in episode 3.  *SCREAMS INTO OBLIVION* I WAS PREPARED TO ACCEPT HER BEING AN ALIEN IN THE SERIES!VERSE THIS SEASON FOR A REASON YOU COWARDS!

-I had a feeling I wasn’t going to like the ‘kids rule everything on this planet’ episode. I was right in a few ways. For one thing, this is the closest we’ll get to having CU and Krupp together and it wasn’t how any of us would have wanted it. ALSO this was another example of ‘this could have been book 8 COMPLETE with an evil version of CU’ but we got denied YET AGAIN!

-Oh yeah, if you read books 2, 3, and 11, you’ll know what could have been adapted too.

-When I saw episode 4 and saw Krupp being with his blue counterpart, I KNEW we’d get fan stuff of those two later on. Honestly, I’m not thrilled about it.... ugh... yeah. No.

-Oh great, Melvin is evil again. Sarcastic whoopie.

-So we SAW Krupp turn into CU right in front of George and Harold’s friends. The fact that he went with them should have tipped some of them off. So do they know now or....? ANSWERS DANGIT!

-The last episode having that big fight was cool, but then the space cops turned out to be real and I just... ugh.

-The planet of the Apes references was... too fast. I thought the monkeys being part of P.O.O.P.S.I.E. would tie into it. And then the Back to the Future reference at the very end felt squeezed in. Also–HOW THE HELL DID CU GET A TIME TOAD ON HIS OWN?!

-So... did season 4 NOT happen at all? If the boys undid the entire season at the very end, then that was a huge let down for many reasons.

So overall, this season had it’s merits, but it COULD have been better with better writing in a few episodes, a couple more episodes, etc. Its never a good sign when you think back and know that the fandom could have done it better. I highly doubt the Coronavirus played a part, considering how long it must have taken to make this half of the show.

I’m guessing that we’ll have to wait until February (or longer, considering what happened this year) for the next season since they didn’t confirm or deny a season 5. If season 5 is the last season, it better be more than six episodes and it better be an improvement to season 4.

[lokilickedme]

Part 2 of Read By Loki Laufeyson - High Rise

By request

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own in 2016 (no longer available there) 

Rating:  Mature

Archive Warning:  No Archive Warnings Apply

Category:  F/M

Fandom:  Loki - Fandom, High-Rise (2015), Tom Hiddleston - Fandom

Relationship:  Loki/His Book

Character:  Loki (narrator), Robert Laing, Richard Wilder

Additional Tags:  Explicit Language, Loki Has Issues, Spoilers, Loki Does What He Wants, stick to the damn book Loki, lewd passages quoted from the book, references to bestiality and incest (thanks a lot for that, Ballard. You’re a dick)

Series:  Part 2 of Read by Loki Laufeyson

Stats:  Published: 2016-02-21   Words: 1220 (original version)

Part One: Loki Reads Chapter 9 of The Night Manager

  High Rise, Read by Loki Laufeyson 

by lokilickedme 

Summary:  Loki narrates another audiobook.  Apologies to JG Ballard, though not very sincere ones.  In fact I take it back, I’m mad that I ever had to read this.

Notes:  See the end of the work for notes 

  Later, as he sat on his balcony eating the dog... 

Well shit, lets just not waste any time at all getting to the good stuff, shall we?  When a book has the unmitigated balls to start off with a barbequed canine for the first course, you know you're in for an entertaining evening chock full of questionable culinary choices written in dirty grey prose, which we all know is just a gateway to every sort of perversion familiar to man and a handful or two heretofore known only to the Aesir - and I’ll tell you right now they get up to some kinky shit that’d make you want to tie your ballsack to a goat.  That’s not a metaphor, they’re known for literally tying their ballsacks to goats.  Okay, one of them is known for it.  Okay, I’m known for it.  It was me.  So once one has committed to snacking on the family pets, what comes after the appetizer, sex with a budgie?  What sort of sauce is the fellow using?  Did he sautee the dog or is that fucker deep fried?  Or am I missing a particularly rude innuendo here and he's actually giving the beast a blow job?  If that's the case then this might end up being a worthwhile read after all, and I can’t think of a much more romantic place than the balcony if you’re actually going to commit to pleasuring the wife’s poodle.

 ...Dr. Robert Laing reflected on the unusual events that had taken place within this huge apartment building during the previous three months.  Now that everything had returned to normal - 

Hold up.  NOW everything's returned to normal?  You're eating a fucking dog, sir, either that or you're fellating it.  In what twisted realm is either of those scenarios considered normal?  We’re not counting Asgard, by the way.  And I'd rather like to know which part of the beast we're talking about here, I mean if it's the drumstick or the tenderloin then I hope you basted it with some herbs and a bit of olive oil before you slapped it on the hibachi.  If you're committing cunnilingus, then I'm presuming you know which part you're dealing with and I'll leave you to it, though the olive oil could serve dual purpose here.  But it does beg the question - is the beast male or female?  Not making a judgement, just getting the visual.

While we're pondering that, I'm going to do us all a colossal favor and skip ahead a bit.  This book really is difficult, and by difficult I mean I've had torture sessions on asteroids that were less annoying.  The story itself is good, heaven knows I enjoy chaos and mayhem and bestiality as much as the next power mad despot, but word for word this tale reads a bit like Lewis Carroll and Roald Dahl having the slowest orgasm in history during a mutual masturbation session while smoking Edgar Allen Poe’s gym shorts.  I actually think I might be having the slowest orgasm in history.

 'Come whenever you want to.'  Laing put his arm around her shoulders, steadying her in case she lost her balance.  In the past he had always felt physically distanced from Alice by her close resemblance to their mother, but for reasons not entirely sexual this resemblance now aroused him.  He wanted to touch her hips, place his hand over her breast.  As if aware of this, she leaned passively against him. 

And there it is my friends.  All good stories need an element of the forbidden, and it looks like sister-diddling wins the perversion jackpot for this evening.  This Laing fellow has the whoo hoos for big sis.  And you people give me shit over my "alleged" deviant relationship with my brother?  Last I recall adopted siblings were free to black hole it all they want, yet here we have a pair working out a tag-up without the benefit of notarized adoption papers.  Since we seem to be condoning this, lets all remember our hypocrisy the next time I'm catching grief for banging Thor, shall we?  And while we're at it, are we all just ignoring the Oedipus train wreck this man just owned up to driving straight into the wall?  'Big sis you look like mummy, here let me drug you and keep you as a sex slave while this whole place goes to hell around us.'  I may or may not be skipping ahead but I'll save you a little time and drudgery - it goes there, people.

 He pulled the drawers on to the floor, heaved the mattresses off the beds, and urinated into the bath. 

Ah, Wilder.  I do love a good silly mustache-twirling villain with self aggrandizing dreams of conquering worlds several floors above his own social status.  Because in the end we all want more than what we’ve got, don’t we?  Thrones, love, respect, use of the penthouse, a herd of stoned females.  At least he didn't piss on the mattress.  Nobody likes a bedwetter, even in hell.

 His burly figure, trousers open to expose his heavy genitalia, glared at him from the mirrors in the bedroom.  He was about to break the glass, but the sight of his penis calmed him, a white club hanging in the darkness. 

Yes my good man, welcome to the fellowship of the knob, our universal handshake is to sit on the sofa with one hand down the front of our pants.  Our penises calm us all.

 He would have liked to dress it in some way, perhaps with a hair-ribbon tied in a floral bow. 

Huh.  Just when I rather think I like this Wilder fellow and his obvious off kilter mental status, he shows us his wiener.  Which was more than enough in itself, thanks so very much for that.  Elegant move there, dipshit - whip it out and slap a bow on it, for times when you really want to class things up.  I for one can't think of anything more entertaining or intellectually fulfilling on a Friday night than tying a pretty ribbon on my schlong and running about with it hanging out of my trousers while I harass and terrorize feral women in derelict apartment buildings.  Sometimes I like to really mix things up by borrowing a pair of mother's clip-on earrings and dangling them from my testicles.  It makes me feel so fucking manly.  You know, for those times when you really want to bang your sister who looks like your mom and you know you stand a better chance of scoring if you really put in some effort with the self decor.  Or you could go all out impressing the masses by tying your ballsack to a goat, but granted, it’s not for everyone.

 This ultimate role had helped him on one occasion, when a marauding band of women led by Mrs Wilder had entered the apartment.  Seeing Laing being abused, and assuming him to be Eleanor's and Alice's prisoner, they had left.  On the other hand, perhaps they understood all too well what was really taking place. 

Yes, what was really taking place was this fellow Laing got himself a couple of kinky babes who were willing to tie him to a chair and beat him with the hind leg of an Alsatian.  I mean, who doesn't get off on that?  I tip my cap to you, Sir.  Never go fifty shades with one woman when you can go full-on Marquis de Sade with two.  And seeing as this merry band of female visigoths was led by that Wilder chap's wife, one can only assume he pilfered her pretty hair bows one time too many and the poor woman felt compelled to start tucking the ginsu’s into her gingham apron and go on raiding parties with her Wednesday night book club group.  Or perhaps it was the 'heavy genitalia' on display out of the front of his pants that drove her over the edge.  I understand leaving one's trousers open while traversing rapidly declining self-contained bastions of reverse civilization is valid grounds for divorce in some states.

 First she would try to kill him, but failing that give him food and her body, breast-feed him back to a state of childishness and even, perhaps feel affection for him.  Then, the moment he was asleep, cut his throat.  The synopsis of the ideal marriage. 

What - all marriages aren't like that? 

I’m going to stop right here so we can all go take a break, order in some Alsation, chase our sisters and next door neighbors around the room with gardening implements and figure out where we hid our morphine stash - which sounds disconcertingly like a typical Saturday evening in Valhalla to me, quite honestly - and summarize the rest of the book, which goes a little something like this:  Madness, mayhem, perversion, murder, violence, death, and why the fuck don’t these people just walk out of the damn building?  Yes I know, it’s an allegory on class warfare and societal prejudices and the shitty tendency humanity has to turn on each other and finally itself when faced with a breakdown in the decency and polite behavior that tentatively holds people at arm’s length until the shit hits the fan and everyone starts coming at each other with golf clubs.  Humans have a disturbing desire to go all Lord of The Flies the moment order breaks down, and this book casts a bloodshot eye on the fucked up results.  I’m telling you though, it’s nothing a good tug’o war match with a goat couldn’t have fixed.

All in all I would say this book is a challenging read, but worth it in the end if for nothing other than the visual of that guy with the bow on his schnitzel.  Best read while mainlining household cleaners directly into your lungs blindfolded and waterboarding yourself while listening to Raul Julia sing the Ave Maria on 45 rpms.  Trust me, you'll understand once you get to the part where the old ladies in cocktail gowns are brawling over use of the elevator. 

 End Notes 

Passages in italics are the property of J.G. Ballard from the novel HIGH RISE, copyright 1975.  I don’t own them, I didn’t write them, and dear god please don’t ask me about the dog.

[homeiswherethestuckis]

4 1 3 21 16

Oh boy that’s a lot this is going to be super freaking long I hope you know that…

4. Do you like your name?  Is there another name you think would fit you better?

I am really glad you asked this because…I want to fill you in on a little secret.  My name sucks.  When I was born, my mother looked down at my tiny baby face and said (this is a near direct quote from her): “I should give this baby a genuinely unique name, something with personality, because lord knows she’s definitely not going to have one.  Not with that face.”So she picked a name that probably by itself would have been fine, but then she decided that not only did she also wanted to be a “cool ‘90s ” mom on top of that, so she switched some of the letters around and called it good.  Granted, there’s not too much of a difference, but when you name a baby after a word that’s in the dictionary that everybody knows because it’s also a common concept (Destiny- the hidden power that is believed to control what will happen in the future) and then switch two letters around (Destyni) you’re not being “edgy” you’re just making things awkward for your child in the future because the kid (me) has to constantly tell people that they’re spelling their name wrong even though they’re spelling the word right and honestly it’s so awkward because…everybody knows how to spell it, so they never ask me how it’s spelled so I have to go and be the jerk with the misspelled name and I feel bad whenever I have to correct them…

The weird thing is though, I can’t think of a single name that would fit me better, probably because I’m so accustomed to this messed up, stupid one. 

1. If someone really wanted to understand you, what would they read, watch, and listen to?

Part of me really wants to say Homestuck, but almost none of my friends read any of it and I still feel like they get me, so that’s not exactly mandatory reading, that’s more extra credit right now… They should definitely read some manga.  At least the basics, like Fullmetal Alchemist or Fruits Basket or something, definitely Ouran High School Host Club because it’s really good and funny and I (and all my friends) loved it. But for reading not involving pictures…Harry Potter for sure!   Lord of the Flies is also good, so are 1984 and Animal Farm…I have a weird variety of taste when it comes to this kind of stuff.  For watching stuff?  I’d probably say Durarara and The Devil is a Part Timer. My entire childhood was pretty much Invader Zim and Disney movies, which is probably explains my weird sense of humor and love of science fiction (Invader Zim) and my Disney references (less prevalent, but they’re there sometimes if you squint real hard). They should definitely definitely DEFINITELY watch some Starkid musicals.  Those things are beautiful.  I’ve seen all of them at least three times (I cried the last time I watched Twisted, it was so good but parts of it were so sad.  If you like Disney movies I recommend that one go watch it right now whenever you have a spare 2+ hours).  Listening wise, I would probably say something like Panic at the Disco, Placebo, and The Airborne Toxic Event are a good enough indication of my taste in music?  I don’t know.  But listening to Welcome to Nightvale is a must.  I love that podcast so MUCH!  It’s beautiful and funny and weird and dark and…it’s just the best I can barely describe it.  I love it so much I named my kitten, Khoshekh, after the cat that floats at a fixed point four feet off the floor in the men’s rest room at the Welcome to Nightvale Radio station.  Anyway, it’s good, give it a listen.

3. List your fandoms and one character each you identify with.

Harry Potter- I wish I could say Hermione Granger, but I’m not that super smart or cool and my real answer has a dorky reason behind it…So, my best pals and I were talking about a year ago about which characters we were and, since there are four of us, we decided to group ourselves into the Marauders (aka James Potter, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, and Remus Lupin).  Anyway, after not much debate and several surprisingly thorough personality tests in which none of us got the same character, I got Remus Lupin.  So yeah, Remus Lupin, werewolf/ lover of chocolate.

Welcome to Nightvale-The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives In Your Home.  No more explanation than that. 

Homestuck-I’ve had moments where I’ve identified with everyone, but I’m going to be basic and say I identify with my sign girl, Terezi Pyrope because I love her and pretty much always got her character the best, plus my number one best friend is a Scorpio, so it’s only fitting.

21. Do you love easily?

Yes and no?  I mean, I love people as friends pretty easily.  Pretty much you just have to talk to me and not be terrible or just laugh at something I said and boom I count you as at least an acquaintance.  Romantically, though?  No, not at all. 

16. If you’d grown up in a different environment, do you think you would have turned out the same?

That’s an excellent question.  I would love to say no, but I know that’s false for the following reasons:I used to go to this really tiny, really expensive private school.  It was kindergarten-12th Grade, and there were about 90 people there including the faculty.  There were six people including me in my entire grade, and I was as social then as I am now, so I wasn’t even really friends with anyone.  Everyone there was Lutheran and Conservative and extremely athletic, all of which are things that I am not.  I don’t want to say I was depressed or anything, because I was about 11 and I don’t really remember a lot, I just remember not really being happy about anything and wanting attention and validation and all that jazz.  Until I switched to public school before sixth grade, I only thought there were that many kids my age in the whole town and that I was just too weird to have a real friendship with anybody.  Then sixth grade came, I switched schools, and I met some of my best friends and found out I’m not as weird and lame as I thought.  So I’m pretty much the same person as I was in sixth grade, just less sad and attention seeking (I hope) and with a bigger, brighter sense of the world.  If I’d stayed where I was, though, there’s not a doubt in my mind I would have eventually given in and tried to conform with my (literally five) peers and probably still have zero deep, real and meaningful relationships. 

Sorry about how long these answers were…

[midsummerreads-archive]

Author & Event Spotlight

The Event: Nemesis Book Launch

Where: Barnes and Noble at the Arboretum, Charlotte NC When: Tuesday, March 21 Who: Brendan Reichs and Renée Ahdieh

This was by far one of the most original panel discussions I’ve ever attended for a book launch, and it might be one of my favorites!  Brendan came prepared with a list of random questions for him and Renée to start off the event.  Those in attendance were treated to a lively conversation where we learned that Brendan’s least favorite word is Pamphlet and Renée’s is one that rhymes with “oist,” although I think everyone dislikes that word (not just you, Brad!).  Both authors told about their Hogwarts houses, Brendan apparently tried to rig the quiz to get Gryffindor, but still ended up a Ravenclaw (Yaaaaas!) with an Eagle Owl patronus (#Same).  Renée is a proud Slytherin, who used to lie about being a Gryffindor, apparently a very Slytherin thing to do and the patronus of a rat, which she is fine with because Ratatouille.

My favorite part of this part was that after asking the audience to choose a number between 1 and 50, they took turns reading a small snippet from each other’s newest releases to the crowd. Someone hollered out 23, so I got this part on video for everyone! They then followed up with a brief summary of their inspiration for these books and what they are about. You can definitely tell these two are good friends and are hilarious together.

After asking each other a few rounds of questions about their books, Brendan was equipped with a Polar Express Conductors hat full of random rapid fire questions for himself and Renée, and coincidentally, those of us in the front row. Some of these conductor questions included Magic Wand or Light Saber, Hogwarts Headmaster or Starfleet Captian, Ghost or Ghostbuster, Prehistoric Times or the year 3010, and on and on.  It was pretty fun and I think it allowed the audience to feel more engaged, although I’m a bit partial since I was able to do the participating.

Brendan and Renée then signed books for the crowd (and there was an impressive one!).  Check out more photos below sprinkled between my interview with the star of the evening, Brendan Reichs!

Midsummer Reads (MSNR): Thanks so much for sitting down with me, are you excited?

Brendan Reichs (BR): I’ve very excited, tonight is the first night I’ve ever done a book event for Nemesis, so it’s a big deal.

MSNR: Yes! And it’s in your hometown.

BR: It is, it’s fun to do it at home. It’s actually a little nerve wracking to do it at home just because you know a lot of people in the audience, so it’s not like having that distance you have with a normal crowd, but it’ll be great.

MSNR: Are a lot of people you know coming?

BR: Uh, they better.

MSNR: That’s how I would be; Uh, I’d better see you or someone’s going to get hurt.

BR: I’m taking names.

MSNR: So this book is super complex.

BR: It is.

MSNR: I was reading it and I was like, SO MANY THINGS HAPPENING. Could you describe it in one sentence to a reader?

BR: I actually try. That’s why it was so hard to actually sell the idea because trying to describe it was too crazy to get it into one sentence. Basically…

MSNR (interrupting because I’m rude): You can describe it in a run-on sentence

BR: I would describe Nemesis as Min is a girl at 16 years old and every two years on her birthday she is murdered by the same person except she doesnt die like a normal person, instead she wakes up about a half a mile away without a scratch on her every single time. So on her 16th birthday after she’s been murdered for the 5th time she’s finally had enough and decides she needs to figure this out.  No one is really paying attention to her because there’s this world wide calamity going on where there’s an asteroid heading towards the planet and no one knows when it’s going to hit. And there’s this bit national/international human existence story going on. So there’s very little attention being paid to the trials of a teenager in Idaho.

MSNR (Interrupting, again, because I’m the worst): Right, because no one pays attention to teenagers.

BR: Right, exactly. And there’s another character, and this book has been fun because it’s the first time I’ve written a male point of view in my career, so Noah is having the same things happen to him except that he’s a little bit less stable than Min.  He’s a – kind of one of those guys that on the outside he – he’s a rich kid and she’s a poor kid – he’s trying to keep everything together but really he is a mess. Because he’s been having the same thing happen to him but he doesn’t trust himself to know that it’s even real. So these two things are happening and they eventually decide and they start to investigate that everyone around them starts to be suddenly implicated and you can’t trust anyone. And they find out that they might be at the center of a vast government conspiracy that may implicate all life on Earth.

MSNR: That is a big run on sentence. I’m okay with it.

BR: Yes, it is.

MSNR: So when I was reading it, I found it to be kind of a commentary on human emotion and the way that human nature really plays into the certain aspects of the two characters, specifically, and how they react to this outside force that’s coming onto them.  Very much like Lord of the Flies, like, they are put in this situation, how are they going to react?

BR: That is an essential influence, and I think the publisher likes to use the tagline of “Orphan Black meets Lord of the Flies,” which is an interesting combination, but there’s no good parallel anyway. But that’s what you want and I appreciate that you say that, because you want the story to be about the characters. Ultimately there’s a lot of plot going on in this book and if you stick with it it will all unwind itself, but it winds up pretty heavily at the beginning where you’re not really supposed to know what the hell is going on for a large portion of the book, and then it’s really good that it’s supposed to be centered on the characters because ultimately that’s where every story either fails or survives is on how good the characters are, because the best plot in the world doesn’t survive if you don’t care what happens. So I spent a lot of time trying to put the characters together, I hate the term strong female protagonist because that implies that your female antagonist has to be masculine or different in a way, you know, I just like to think of her as a strong person, and it shouldn’t be noteworthy that she is female, and it was interesting to get to write a male character’s perspective, although I’ve not read the entire breadth of YA, but I’d never read a YA where the male lead was basically kind of a mess.

(Literally this whole time I’m nodding my head and agreeing, because Brendan has taken over the interview **in a good way**) 

BR (continued): So i thought that would be fun because that’s normally assigned to a female character, so you get to overcome their internal difficulties, which can be boring, but what if this is a 15 to 16 year old boy who is putting the good face out there but doesn’t really have an idea of what he is doing with his life. I mean what is happening to him and stuff. So that was the motivation for that. If you like the characters then that’s exactly what I’m about.

MSNR: I actually assigned them songs: Um, I put Min as being very much like Titanium by David Guetta and Sia.

BR: That’s very good.

MSNR: And then I put Noah as more of the Bleachers, I don’t know if you’ve heard of them, um, Jack Antonoff, and it’s called I Wanna Get Better. It’s about mental health and screaming at himself “I wanna get better,” I want to be better than this, and that’s kind of exactly how I see Noah.

BR: Somewhere in the blogosphere (*waves* hey everyone!) there’s a, and I believe it’s for YA Highway, I’d have to look it up, but I did make two playlists. On the Min Playlist, the first song is a Halsey song, because when I listened to her album that just clicked to me, I was like, this is that kind of angry but not a pushover type vibe that I was getting. Like she was pissed off and isolated, but she’s also not asking for favors.

MSNR: Which I really like. Because sometimes girls are perceived as being, you know, weak and asking for help a lot. At least in the South, which is what I grew up with.

BR: And there’s some great YA being written right now with female lead characters, so this is in no way sort of any genre defining effort, just that in the beginning the came fully formed to me, and that she would be isolated and damaged by what had happened to her, but NEVER broken by it. Just that she’s a fighter and she stays that way even though it does have it’s affects. YOu know she acts like she has no friends..

MSNR: Awe, but I like Tack though. Even though he never knows when to shut up.

BR: No, he doesn’t And Tack is sort of my character, and every one of my books that I write, there’s basically one character that’s sort of me talking through the book, you know what I would say in each situation, because I’m kind of a smart ass that doesn’t know when to be quiet either, and that’s sort of Tack in this book.  He’s basically saying the things that I would be saying when I shouldn’t be, you know, running my mouth.

MSNR: Honestly there’s a little bit of all of us in Tack, probably, especially when we were teenagers and never knowing quite when to be quiet.

THIS IS THE SPOT WHERE WE TALK ABOUT SPOILERY THINGS. 

PROMISED BRENDAN IT WOULD BE OFF THE RECORD *SINGS* LALALALALALA

BR: This was the last piece that fell into place for the book. I’m a big planner and when you write books like this that are so plot oriented they have to make sense and you have to keep track of what’s happening.

Matchy-matchy!

MSNR: So let’s just refer to it as “The Twist,” so where you plotting the book and then “the twist,” fell in or you were influenced by outside research?

BR: Most of the time the best ideas that come to me when I’m writing come to me about 2/3rds of the way through the first draft. This is when I’ve been living with the idea for about two months, and I’ll wake up one day, and typically in the shower, it will come to me and will have connected overnight. And this was one of the last pieces to come in and it was really three book ideas that all really came together in this crazy boo, which is why it’s so overbaked in terms of that there’s so much in it and because I had all this stuff and I managed to slot it all in together.

MSNR: I know, but I like that it has so much in it because it keeps you on your toes. I literally had to put it down to go to sleep, and I was so concerned about trying to figure out what was happening!

BR: And this is the stuff that I like to read…

Renée Ahdieh (RA)  shows up being adorable: Totally crashing!

MSNR: Hi, how are you!

RA: Good, how are you?

MSNR: Good!

RA (to BR): What’s up, how are you feeling?

BR: Good, good.

MSNR: This is weird, but you smell really good. (I still think this is weird but I had to keep this in haha)

BR: She always smells good, it’s a signature.

RA (wanders away, being fabulous): *laughing at us* I do like that.

MSNR: So, I’m not going to lie. The guy in the black suit? I totally pictured him as Agent Smith from the Matrix the whole time, and maybe that’s because I grew up with the Matrix, but yeah.

BR: No, that’s fair. And for our generation it would be an Agent Smith type- I mean- for me he looks a little different. Although for me, and this is probably not something I should admit to an audience, but I find the way the character looks, and in the book I’m consistent in the way the character looks but in my head that’s never how the character looks.  it’s just a weird dissonance that no one’s ever called out before because no one knows what things look like in my head.

MSNR: In my head he looked like Agent Smith.

BR: Right, for me he’s more of a Guy Pierce, but yeah you know it’s like a flat hair, flat face individual. And I just finished drafting the second draft of the sequel…

MSNR: So we are going to learn more about the project?

BR: It gets darker and deeper and a lot of the Lord of the Flies aspects are really going to come to the fore, because one of the questions I was dealing with was, the main premise, which was that I wanted to fight the finality of death, and what if death was not final; but not in like a zombie way or a ghost way or a resurrection way, but legitimately if it just didn’t work. Like, you died but you didn’t.

MSNR: As long as Tack isn’t Piggy the whole time.

BR: Right. Well, there’s a lot of, and you know I read Lord of the Flies, and you realize only two people die in that.

MSNR: Yes, but you get it.

BR: But they played it and it’s so beautifully written and you get their dissent. And with my book, I’m hoping to get that same thing, but also that a lot of people die. Because you know with Min’s experience in this book, death has not been permanent and that is such a central question. How would you deal with that? How do you deal with the idea that something that you know should be the end of something isnt? And you can’t really control it?

MSNR: I think the last question I have for you, because I don’t want to keep you too long, is that why you decided to do it on their birthdays, and you know not on…

BR: That is a question that will be revealed, and there’s a lot of little detail strings that are still out there and that’s because you don’t really know at the end of Nemesis, what is next. This book leads you to a point, but it doesn’t take you past that.  And a careful reader would ask themselves, “wait, why was this happening,” but I haven’t gotten to that yet.  That’s a great answer. You know if I didn’t answer it, “Oh, it’s in book 2!” And then I’m like, will you write that down and send it to me? Just in case I made a mistake.

MSNR: When can we expect book two?

BR: Uh, it should be a year. I mean I’m putting in the drafts now so I expect roughly the same time next year.  You know, we don’t have much say. I really like Spring releases, which you never know, but I assume it would be next spring.

MSNR: Well, thank you so much for talking with me!

BR: No, thank you so much.

MSNR: It was so good to meet you in person!

BR: Good to meet you too, and I’ll see you..

MSNR: Yep, you’ll see me in a few minutes!

  A huge and special thanks to Brendan Reichs, Penguin Teen, and Renée Ahdieh for the event on March 21.

Nemesis is available NOW! Go pick up a copy.

    Author & Event Spotlight was originally published on A Midsummer Night's Read

[abnahaya]

How was your heartbreak?

Heartbreaks are always interesting story to tell, not because bad incidents are more attractive, but for many perspective they can be seen yet still interesting. Most people see heartbreaks as an end, but they also can be brand new beginnings too. Heartbreaks mostly refer us to think of lovers, but they occur between other people and things too. So as thebeginning of the month of love, let’s talk about heartbreaks.

(I think I am too influenced by the heavy rain and the gloomy mood and unable to stop thinking how miserable I will be on the upcoming Valentine day, but please ignore it.)

Frankly, I wanna write about a heartbreak today for some of the people who are close to me went through it recently. not to mention that I too, still recovering from one. So since I have asked about yours before (from the title, yes) therefore I will slightly tell you about mine.

My heartbreak was sophisticated. Literally.

The latest massive heartbreak I had was almost a year ago when I was dumped. yep, you didn’t read it wrong. I had this boyfriend whom I dated for almost two years, and I actually believed him when he said: “It’s not about who is the most perfect, let’s stick around each other no matter what happens and protect what we have. (re: the relationship)” It was one of the most beautiful things someone ever said to me, really, only if he actually meant it -which he did not.

Anyway, I was so in love with him that the breakup -although I knew best that it was the only and best way for me- fucked me up pretty bad. Still-haunted-by-the-same-person-for-a-year bad. No matter how much he hurt me that time, and me being completely aware that it’s so much better for not having him around, I will not lie, my mind flies to his image whenever I hear a love song; if you know what I mean. And there are points when I feel really tired of it, I mean, come on, heart, it’s almost a year and we all know that he never worth it. My friends keep telling me to stop thinking of him and stuffs, but seriously, I wish I know how. I too, feel stupid when a hot guy tries to hit on me but I cannot feel anything towards him, not even a glimpse of attraction, but in the contrary I keep on dreaming of the same jerk.

I mean, I know, technically I just have to focus on whatever I’m doing now, building my career and new social life, upgrading myself and shits. And I’m trying to do it now, I work hard and enjoy life on my spare time, what can possibly go wrong? Why have I not in peace? Well, one thing was wrong. I believe in myself too much I forgot that there’s a greater power that I can always rely on. 

So one night, I kneeled down and prayed. I asked God, how?

The next day I went to church and got this readings from Rome 12:

Love in Action

9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.[c] Do not be conceited.

17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;   if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[e]

21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Did you see the italic lines? My tears almost bursted out when the priest actually reading those. Those words penetrates my soul. 

Once again, Jesus answered my prayer.

The passage lead me into thinking of how I have been managing my heartbreak for the past year.I was deeply hurt so that I am blinded to other things, I keep playing victim, and therefore I keep being hurt. It’s like I closed the door, but let the windows open. 

So how did I manage my heartbreak all this time? 

When I am down. I share with people. First mistake, I hardly share with God on the first place. Second, was it really all sharing to lessen the burden? was it not to justify myself and make me feel a bit more at ease, (just a bit, since it will come again) and create the feeling as if I have forgiven him and move on?

Honestly speaking, I haven’t forgiven him. I know I have to and I think I have been trying to, but I have not. Another mistake.

It’s like when someone tells you that they fell from a bicycle. Which one is more effective? Asking how they fell or telling them how to treat the wound (or even better, help them!). And vise versa, I won’t get better from telling everyone how I got heartbreak, no matter how much satisfying it feels.

It is SUPER HARD to restrain myself from not talking about how cruel he was towards me for all this time (I lose myself most of the times, too), like so hard until I need to write it on capslock. But then I realize I just spread hatred, maybe now too what is left inside of me for him is not love, it’s just hatred. We all know love and hatred are thinly separated, anyway. But hey, it’s been a year and talking about how shitty my ex bf is proven as ineffective alternative. 

I prayed for him, many times, but did I really mean it? How can a real prayer come out from a heart full of hatred? I really don’t have the answer for that.

In case you can not grasp what I’m implying, to put it simple: to overcome a heartbreak, you need to LOVE MORE. Because when you love like Jesus does, there will be only goodness, as you can read again from the passage. Those are what we do when we love, especially when what we love is something (or someone) evil. 

Finally, I understand what the quote was all about.

The first time I know this quote was from another heartbreak of a good friend of mine, when she was betrayed by her 10-yrs relationship-boyfriend yet she couldn’t come to say goodbye. She thought it was the reflection of the quote, when we love someone so much untill it hurts, then we become unable to feel the hurt again and only keep loving. Yeah, I know, stupid, and wrong too! LOL

But I did feel the same way when I thought I could not come to hate my ex. Another mistake to the list. When you love someone or something so much but somehow whatever it does only causes you pain, love more. Why? Love does not hurt. If you really love, only goodness comes out from you, whatever happens, you will be able to smile and say, “I still love you.” If you don’t, you haven’t loved enough.

Need an example? Sure.

I once was told about how afwully annoying I was and got asked, “how can your mom stand with you all along? how can your friends bear to be with you all this time?” Well, they love me. Truly love me. I lied to my mom, I fought with my friends, we’ve been through bad times, but here we are, we keep up with each other.

And again, I feel so blessed to know Jesus as my Savior, for not only He leads us with true example, He literally tell us how, in a very educative way. He does not give a list of Dos&Don’ts but He lists the essence of His teachings, for us to be interpreted an applied according to our situation, problems, and faith. And today, I learnt how to deal with my heartbreak. 

If this does not make sense to you, no problem at all. I used to be called ‘too naive’ whenever I try to explain how I wanna be fair or keep on seeing the positivity out of the bad people/things, like “you need to see how cruel the world can be and it does not work by kindness at all.” I might not know the world as much as you do, but I know everyone in the world needs kindness, and love. I know it sounds lame and not cool, but hey, it works for me, so why don’t you try it too?

So how was your heartbreak? Because mine is just hard enough to push me loving more. I hope I don’t annoy you with this post, tho, lol. Keep on loving! Cheers!