#what louis said WAS the truth

[pynkhues]

A while back Rolin said that they're playing with points of view and are sticking with lestat's. I think it makes sense since the books he mentioned planning to adapt- up to Memnoch- are all from Lestat's pov (with the exception of some chapters from qotd, but even those stories are told to Lestat and he's the one who wrote the book). I think that after TVL, Rolin wants to move completely to the modern timeline, so for the rest of the series we'll be in the third person omniscient/objective pov with some occasional flashbacks.

For me both 1.06 and 2.06 have that weird unreal feeling to them, I remember reading a post mentioning how the train scene and Antoinette's house scene couldn't happen the way it was shown and I agree. Overall, there's too much inconsistency in these both eps for me to believe that things happened the way it was told. I think we'll never know the whole true and tbh i'm fine with that. Personally, I think the only thing that really needs to be revisited is the trial. We've already had Louis, Armand's and Claudia's pov and there's no need for more of it, and there'not enough screen time for the constant revisits and flashbacks.

Rolin also mentioned that after season 2 they'll be done with the unreliable narrator and memory is a monster trope. I really hope that this is true because it's become very tiresome. Some people are already saying that Lestat lied about the two revisited scenes from 2.07 and how all of them are unreliable narrators and we can't believe anyone etc, when for me it's obvious that it was not the show's intention. People may hate it all they want but it was clear that Lestat in the books wasn't written as a deliberate liar, Rolin is sticking with it and the show wants us to believe that 2.07 flashbacks scenes are the truth. And I'm so ready to be done with all this mess.

Yeah, I mean, I do think Lestat will be the primary POV character as I said in yesterday's post, but I do think they're in a little bit of a tricky position to have two seasons with such restricted POV only to leap into a new one for the rest of the series' run. It works for the books because there's a longer break between them being published, but also because they function as standalone novels within a broader series, whereas the show does need to have more overarching consistency in order to manage tone and audience expectations. I think they did a good job of opening up the narrative with s2, and again, I do think they're going to shift towards Lestat, but I just don't think it'll actually work for the series at all to lose Louis' POV at this point, which I think Rolin is aware of given his continued reassurance that Louis' remaining a lead.

It's also interesting that you mention Rolin wanting to shift into the current timeline after TVL, which makes sense given QOTD and Body Thief are predominantly contemporary, but I think that also potentially lends to Armand having some POV sequences in the new season? It doesn't sound like Rolin's planning on adaptating TVA, and he's already threaded some parts of his backstory in too, but the logical place to further weave it in is through Lestat's interactions with Armand and Marius in the past. It does feel a bit like a Matryoshka with it being flashbacks in flashbacks, but they managed that well with the trial (I do think it needs to be limited though).

Also interesting that you think 1.06 and 2.06 couldn't have happened the way that they did! I definitely agree that there are inconsistencies, and that the show doesn't have the time to address them all (nor should they - overexplanation is the death of story, tbh), so I'm curious to see what does end up getting addressed.

As for unreliable narration/memory is a monster -- I still like it, haha, and imagine there'll be threads of it throughout the series' run. The nature of subjectivity is unreliable, and the amount of unmanaged trauma Lestat has inevitably feeds into the monstrousness of his own memories as he steps into the primary POV character, but it makes sense to retire them as the major themes with the IWTV arc having finished up.

[thegirloffans]

It's hilarious to me that Louis thought he was punishing Lestat by choosing Armand over him when really it was LESTAT punishing Louis for choosing Armand over him

[book-tease]

I think some people are way too willing to think of lestats pov as the truth and it's very confusing to me bc what about lestat as a character makes you think he's gonna be more truthful than louis-

[dxxtruction]

its probably meant to be somewhat ambiguous but it seems most likely that armand was gaslighting louis so that he didn't trust himself and daniel didn't trust him. he also seemed to basically get what he wanted by instigating a fight and igniting some passion, we see by next ep's start it probably got resolved with sex and absolution. idk the talamasca angle is not as interesting a story

Ask is in reference to this post: HERE

That's cool. You're able to hold that I'm able to hold mine. Interpretations are just that. I will say it doesn't matter whether Armand planted them, or not, because he still ends up gaslighting Louis in the 2x04 argument anyway. It’s effectively gaslighting even if they are telling the truth here as they see it because of how things stack up and what's said.

It is basically how you said, and I'll just go ahead and expand for anyone who might not see it so clearly. Initially, it seems he's more or less trying to just get Louis off his case for the photos, and is willing to throw him, his mental state, and character under the bus, to do so. But Louis already straight up knows him of doing manipulative things, of this exact sort, in the interview before this event even occurred - Namely that Armand is making himself look far more approachable, and better to Daniel, even after they'd both agreed to basically tear this guy to shreds, which makes Louis look worse by default, and goes against what they agreed to both do. Armand has a repeated tendency to fall through on his promises, or promise things, but then take it his own direction when it suits him. In all cases, he does keep obstructing Louis interview, especially when it comes to Daniel, and won't fully admit to it. - this is why Louis' so reactive, among just the fact he has trauma related to being denied his own interiority, fullness, and freedoms, because he's Black, and in society, seen less human. Armand simply doesn't help his case by denying it, even if it were actually his truth that the photos weren't his doing. (Note; Armand has also faced horrific dehumanizing traumas, but in such a differing way I don't think he's able to empathize with the same way Louis been dehumanized in life. I argue a little if Louis is even able to do more than simply hold a lot of sympathy for Armand, as they really are not a lot alike in both their interior and exterior reality. I don't think that sympathy goes both ways often.)

The way he's also keeps behaving like the bigger person in this reinforces the belief Armand wants out of Louis, making him 'see' it, and probably also to Daniel as well who's definitely overhearing this (this particular part has a chance of being unintentional however, if he was only really intending to deescalate, but it still keeps the same effects).

Not only making Louis look like he's crazy to assume it, but denying he'd been doing anything wrong of the sort (by simply at no point coming forward and saying something reassuring of Louis reality along the lines of, 'I have been doing those things, it's just not this, and those weren't my intentions to hurt you with it, I'm sorry' or simply 'okay, I did it, sorry'). As well, it doesn't matter how much Armand's truthful, Louis is someone who necessarily does need reality checks like that, because he suffers from hallucinations, and as he's finding out, memory lapses, and not providing them will make him jump to presume it could be his own symptoms. Also, at one point in the argument, he actually throws out that Louis is insane, if it needed to be anymore obvious. Which is derogatory, if arguably true, though reinforces that Armand's behaviors to 'stop or aid his madness' in prior instances were all a-okay, and all necessary. There's nothing wrong with him, and what he's doing, its all Louis. (His intentions to deescalate, if anyone wants to take on that idea, would've changed by then. It reads as a pattern to me mimicking of the promises falling through.)

Anyway, I'd be saying in my interpretation that him willing to keep this up, even though the photos had nothing to do with it, just shows how much he'd actually use any situation that arises to manipulate/control Louis, and mess with Louis interview, as opposed to orchestrating or planning situations, so he can then also manipulate with it. With all intentions or not, it doesn't really matter. Which makes his manipulation more realistic, honestly. A better portrait of who Armand is tbh.

I don't claim this transcript as 100% accurate, but it's as close as I can get it:

L: Four Fred Steins in the album, four. You made me look foolish. 

A: You just assume it was me. 

L: Well, it wasn’t me. 

A: You sure about that? 

L: Excuse me?

A: I take it back. 

L: Take it way fucking back. 

A: It was probably an honest mistake from the staff.

L: You think I need to be coddled, hyped up, lied to? 

-cut-

A: You’re being Lestat! 

L: Go call on him, see what happens. 

A: A little ridiculous… It's the staff, dear.

L: I’m being ridiculous? You wanna see, you wanna see ridiculous? 

A: No, Louis, it was an honest mistake. You knew it.

L: AAAH

A: You weren’t here- 

L: LA LA LA LA

A: -And more and more of them-

L: LA LA

A: They got through! 

-flashbacks-

A: This isn’t about Lestat! 

-more flashback-

L: You lobbed at Daniel, and disrespected me. 

A: no no no no no no.

-flashback-

L: and over and over and over it’s always the same damn thing. 

A: You trying to trick me?

L: I don’t know I’m just your God now. The abandonment, and aren’t we both cut throat? 

A: You won’t believe me, when I was here. I’m the one who can see! 

L: Alright, first off, first off. 

A: You are insane! 

-fb-

L: You always do this! … We’ll be done with Daniel any day now. Now, knock it off. Its about the record, this is my interview. You hear me? The whole interview that will be heard by me. 

A: In a future that you won’t see!

-fb- 

L: No more! Will you go to speak without asking first. No more! Will you ever flirt around on your years. 

A: Oh, come to Dubai, Louis says, but not me. 

-Then I can’t make out anything-

Sex and absolution I do agree with as well. Like they did do that. I don't think either were expecting it to go that way from the beginning, though, as in neither started or orchestrated a reason for argument just to have makeup sex. That being somewhat normal for them after a big argument like that would not surprise me however. A certain interpretation I take of them having sex after (given the argument) was more that (it seems to me) part of the accusations here is that Armand is 'flirting' to win over Daniel's favor, and trying to get with him? Maybe even back together with him? (Centered a lot around Armand telling him his little love story with Lestat.) If not, just turning him against him. So having sex could reinforce Armand had/has no intentions of leaving, further obstructions wrt Daniel, and/or infidelity. That it's 'me and you' and not 'you and him'. (Which could be the real lie depending on how you want to take it here lmao. And is so bound to fall through because... Armand doesn't keep his promises, not even to himself it seems since he turned Daniel).

Again all interpretations are just that, so long as it can be legitimately supported by the text, and isn't grossly insensitive. The Talamasca just adds to the whole scene to me more than it detracts from it. The outside world necessarily has influenced both of their inside worlds, and further how they interact with each other in both, and is the cause behind of a lot of their behaviors and reactions. Talamasca causing those to erupt sort of points to that. It's real. The whole narrative actually feels more concrete and like there's a world outside who can still influence them if they were the one's doing it. Sometimes I feel people want to center Louis a bit too much in the story, which is fair, it is his story, he has a narrative that should be centered, but it is also other people's story as well. They are playing roles here in it.

Also this is why I really wonder if they'd ever revisit this? I'm a little peeved about it being so hidden tbh. There seems like so much added context and we're denied most of it from the music and constant flashbacks. Fingers-crossed maybe Daniel was recording it? IDK.

[mycenaae]

it's so interesting going into the iwtv tags and seeing people be like "oh but when lestat gets involved then the REAL TRUTH will come out!!!" as if he isn't a fucking liar / exaggerator too

[paddington-two]

revisiting the turning claudia scene AND showing us the rest of the s1 fight in one episode. this show is crazy

[salmoncakepls]

...🦌?

[persepinas]

What truly touches my heart and makes me love Loustat as much as I do is that, on the show, they were friends.

They were friends while Louis was human and genuinely enjoyed each other's company. They would go out, have fun, and laugh. They would sit on their bench and talk for hours. Louis would likely mention a book he'd read, and Lestat would listen despite wanting to talk about music or art. He would listen to Louis and take in all he said and not only from his thoughts, which was an advantage, but Lestat would listen to his voice.

Lestat saw Louis, really saw him, and fell in love with him. With his human heart. With his beautiful brown eyes, the flush of his cheeks, and the sound of his human heart faintly joining Lestat"s in song.

And Louis fell in love with Lestat, too. He fell in love with his silly accent and his strange, foreign ways and would convince himself that despite all the odd tricks that Lestat could perform, he was worth the time spent getting to know. Louis would look forward to all those nights with Lestat. Louis allowed Lestat to see beneath the facade of who he was to the public and see the truth of his heart and soul. Louis was able to be vulnerable and he trusted Lestat with all of this.

They were friends. They loved one another and then fell in love, and that's so beautiful. Their connection existed before the change and before the blood connection. Only Lestat is left in the world to remember the gorgeous brown eyes and the sound of Louis' human heartbeat. The touch of his warm, human skin and Louis' voice in his head from so long ago. He was so desperately in love with Louis the moment he saw him, yes, but once Lestat was able to know him? And Louis was able to let go and be himself around Lestat finally? They were both done for.

There is so much to Loustat and their love, but this is something so important and moving and truly is one of the biggest reasons why I love them.

[sheerfreesia007]

Fitted Love

Pairing: Lee Felix x Reader

Word count: 2,385

Content warnings: Soft smut, MDNI, Fluff, insecurities

Summary: Felix has invited you to be his plus one for a Louis Vuitton event and you need to be fitted for a dress for the event. When Felix notices that your mind is starting to grow dark with your insecurities he reminds you how perfect you are for him in the best way possible.

Yeobo: Honey

The room is busy with activity as you stand on the large white pedestal in front of the Louis Vuitton designer and her team of assistants and jewelry designers. Felix is going to be attending an event that’s hosted by Louis Vuitton and has asked you to join him for the event. Louis Vuitton had personally told Felix that he’d love to design a dress for you so the two of you were currently at the design studio for Louis Vuitton trying to find the perfect dress for you to match with Felix for the event. You nod your head at the assistants as they move about you while you stand on the pedestal in front of the large mirrors. The design manager is standing to the side with her hip cocked out and a deep furrow on her brow as her eyes trail up and down your body that’s displaying one of the creations. She moves closer to you and smooths down the fabric at your side and you watch her silently hoping that this would be the last dress that you try on today. It has been hours since Felix brought you to the design studio and you’ve lost count of how many dresses you’ve tried on now after the design manager asked for the fifth dress to be brought out. You hold your breath and widen your eyes slightly hopeful that your torture will finally end but the manager sighs softly before shaking her head and you’re let down once again.

“It’s not right.” she says woefully before turning to her assistant. “Bring out the emerald green one please.” She instructs and the assistant nods before rushing out of the room. You try not to sigh too loudly but a soft one slips out of your mouth and the manager looks up at you with an apologetic look. “I’m sorry sweetheart. They’re just not sitting right and I don’t want to give you a dress that doesn’t fit you well and make you feel good in it.” she apologizes and you shake your head as your insecurities start to rise up inside you.

“No, no. It’s not your fault.” you tell her with another shake of your head and she smiles brightly at you with a determined look.

“Don’t worry I’m pretty sure this next dress will be the one. I’m sure of it. I think I’ve finally figured out what looks best on you. I’m sorry for it taking so long.” she said with a hopeful smile on her face while you nod your head at her. Your eyes dart over to the mirrors and you begin to critically gaze at your body as you stand in the beautiful dress. Your mind begins to whisper dark hurtful words that make you frown softly as you feel that they’re only the truth that you don’t want to believe. Just as you’re beginning to spiral in the dark thoughts you spot Felix sitting in a chair behind you not far from the pedestal, his legs are crossed at the knees and he’s resting his elbow on his knee while his chin rests on his fist. You can feel his eyes taking you in silently and you shift slightly at his attention which causes his eyes to dart up to yours. A gasp is punched out of your chest when you see how dark his eyes have gotten after watching you get changed into the different dresses since you got here and you know exactly what that look means, he’s ready to pounce on you as soon as the room clears. You’re trying to catch your breath as you take in his stoic expression while his stormy heated eyes make your pulse raise like that of prey being hunted. Your mind instantly empties of any dark hurtful thought about your body and you’re reminded of how his body moved against yours last night in bed, the way his hands gripped you tightly and held you flush against his body as he worshipped you with his mouth and body. Lust and desire spike within you and you’re suddenly drowning in the lustrous memories of how Felix made you reach your high three times last night.

Suddenly the assistant came walking back into the room holding a dress bag, and you’re slammed back into reality as your thoughts and memories popped like bubbles in your mind. You distracted yourself by watching her hang the bag up and unzipping it to show the stunning emerald green dress to the room. It’s absolutely beautiful and you’re feeling slightly unsure as your eyes take it in, would it fit you right? Would it look as good on you as it does on the hanger? Another assistant began helping you out of the dress you were currently wearing and as you stepped out of it your eyes caught onto Felix’s heated stare as he gazed at your exposed body. He shifted in his seat a little bit and you knew he was getting more comfortable. No doubt he was hard after watching you get undressed. You shifted on your feet feeling exposed and at his mercy while all he was doing was sitting there looking at you. Your body flushed with heat and you watched as a soft knowing smirk slipped onto Felix’s mouth before his eyes captured yours in another heated stare through the mirror.

“Alright, I think this is the one.” the manager said pulling your attention away from Felix, allowing you to begin breathing again without feeling the pressure of Felix’s attention. You step into the dress and the assistants help close it at the back and you sigh out in relief. The dress feels luxurious against your body and your eyes darted to the mirror while your mouth fell open slightly at how beautiful you looked in the dress. “Yep, this is the one.” the manager said and you nodded your head happily in agreement with her. Your eyes then darted over to Felix and saw him staring at you with lust filled heated eyes as he hid his mouth behind his fist.

The manager continues to adjust the dress on your body only pinning certain places so that the dress hugged your body perfectly effectively showing it off in the best way possible. You shifted from foot to foot as you felt Felix’s eyes raking up and down your form before the manager clapped her hands together loudly.

“I think that’s it. We’ll make the adjustments and deliver the dress to Felix as soon as it’s done. On the day of the event we’ll have a whole team to help you dress and get ready.” the manager informs you while the assistants help you back out of the dress and into a silk robe. You nod your head at her thanking her and her team before they all file out of the room leaving you and Felix alone together. Your eyes find his in the mirror and he’s suddenly standing at a glacial pace before stalking towards you. His gaze keeps you pinned in your spot on the pedestal and your body shivers under the silk robe.

“Do you know how absolutely beautiful you look?” he asks softly as he comes to stand in front of you holding his hand out for yours. He helps you down off the pedestal and guides you to stand in front of him as he positions the two of you in front of the mirrors. His hands slowly glide down your sides and you’re suddenly shaking in his arms knowing that this was going to be a repeat of last night.

“Felix.” you say in a whisper and he tuts out in sharp staccato beats before one of his hands comes up to rest against your neck guiding your head to stare into the mirror.

“I need you to watch Yeobo. I’m going to show you how stunning you are and I need you to watch.” he husks out to you as his mouth places open wet kisses against the back of your neck. You gasp as the hand that’s not resting on your neck slides up the front of your body and tugs the knot of the belt on your robe, the fabric hiding your body loosens and then his hand is sliding underneath the silk material to cup your breast in his large hand. You moan brokenly as your head tips back against his shoulder and your back arches prettily for him thrusting your breast into his hand. “No, no Yeobo. You need to watch.” he scolds you gently, gripping your neck a little tighter in his hand.

Your answering gasp is loud in the empty room as you drop your head forward to stare into the mirror as he continues to grope at your chest under your robe. The hand around your neck falls away to grope and cup your other breast sliding the silk off your body exposing more of your skin and lingerie as you whimper at his ministrations.

“Look at this body.” he instructs you and you try to focus your eyes on where his hands are gripping you. “So perfect for me. You fit in my hands like you were made for them. Made for me.” he husks out as he grinds up against your ass. You groan when you feel his hardness pressing up against you and make a conscious effort to keep your eyes on the mirror as he moves his hands against you. His hands glide up to your shoulders and gently slip the material from your body to let it pool at your feet before his hands are moving once again, one goes back up to your breasts but this time to pinch and flick against your straining nipples while his other travels down to slip into your underwear. “Oh Yeobo, have been this wet for long?” he asks huskily while nipping at the skin on your make making you keen and cry out loudly.

“Felix, please.” you whine out to him as your hands come up and slam against the mirror in front of you. He chuckles low in tone as he crowds you further against the mirror pressing his front flush against your back and grinding upwards into you.

“My poor Yeobo. Wet and needy for me even when your mind is trying to tell you lies about your body. Don’t worry Yeobo I’ll make sure to chase all those lies away as I show you how much I worship you. Just like last night yeah?” he coos at you and you cry out loudly once more as you press back against him.

Suddenly you’re gasping as your bra loosens against your skin and Felix helps you take it off letting it fall to the floor with your robe before his hands slip into your underwear and guide it down your legs. You step out of them and he’s back on you, his clothed body flush against your naked one making you moan for him. You can hear the sound of his zipper sliding down and then the weight of his hardness against your ass makes you whimper.

“Tell me Yeobo. Are you perfect for me?” he asks you and you stare at him dazedly through the mirror while nodding your head quickly. You’re consumed by you lust and desire for him and only want him to ease the ache inside your core. “Tsk, tsk. Use your words pretty girl.” he coos at you scolding you.

“Yes, yes I’m perfect for you. Please Felix, make me feel beautiful.” you moan out to him and he smirks at you through the mirror.

“I could never say no to you Yeobo.” he tells you before he’s suddenly slamming into you. You gasp and choke on air as you feel him stretch you out as you fingers curl against the mirror. You shift back against him trying to get him to move but he stills your hips for a second taking a moment to breathe with you. “My perfect little Yeobo. You feel like home to me.” he tells you and you cry out at his sentiment just before he pulls out and slams back into you. His hips thrust and cant up against you while he leans over you, his hands gripping your hips tightly and his eyes boring into yours through the mirror.

The two of you are a mess of hurried desperate thrust, high pitched whines from you and low deep grunts from him. His mouth is hot and wet as he kisses your neck and shoulders licking against your salty sweat slicked skin as he moves harshly against you.

“C’mon Yeobo, show how much you love it when I worship you. My pretty little Yeobo, no one can compare to you. You’re the only one for me. So beautiful, so sweet.” he coos at you lovingly and you’re gasping for air as your orgasm starts to rise up within you like a hot tidal wave of lava ready to singe and burn you with it’s magnitude.

“Felix, Felix, Felix. Please, oh god. Please!” you cry out and he groans softly at your words as you clamp down on him. Your orgasm suddenly drags you under its hot grip and you’re screaming loudly into the air as your back arches and your knees lock while your body begins to shake uncontrollably. Felix’s hands come up to cup and grip your breasts before he’s slamming into you once, twice, three times before he stills and you feel his release spurt into you. You whimper at the heat of it all and begin to melt against him as his arms wrap securely around your body holding you close to him.

“That’s it Yeobo.” he coos at you while holding you up. “Look how beautiful you are. My stunning gorgeous Yeobo.” he whispers to you as you both stare at each other in the mirror. He kisses your cheek sweetly and you giggle softly at his actions and how contrasting they are to what you both just did. “C’mon let’s go home. I’m not done showing you how perfect you are for me.” he instructs you and begins to help clean you up and dress you to head home.

SKZ Taglist: @kayleefriedchicken, @babigriin, @inlovewithstraykids, @channiesrightasscheek

[lizardkingeliot]

This moment cannot be captured in gifs. You can feel the madness in Lestat's mannerisms and hear it in his voice. He is not even a little bit okay. This early part of the performance is based on the biggest lie of the trial: that Lestat was the one who was hunted by Louis. And I imagine that was the hardest thing to sell for him. The idea that he hasn't always wanted Louis from the very moment he laid eyes on him. It's understandable that he almost lost himself a second later. That he dissociated and forgot his lines. That standing there and lying about that truest truth of their early love story—that Lestat wanted him so much it was agony—was nearly an impossible task for him...

I'm going to need to digest the episode a bit more and rewatch the whole thing to fully grasp what I think Armand the coven was doing when they forced him to lie about this specifically when so much of the rest of the performance was based on truth (and Louis confirmed as much when he said Lestat's recounting of Claudia's turning was accurate). But I think it's probably just that it plays into the whole Lestat The Victim narrative they were trying to sell much better...

[lanf1an]

DREAMS lando norris pt.7 When your childhood bestfriend Flo had convinced you to get the fashion design job at her brother's company Quadrant, it finally paid off when Louis Vuitton was announced as the new sponsor for F1.

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 pt.6 pt.8

Next race weekend you walked on to the paddock unsuspectingly. But you couldn’t not notice multiple press taking your photo. Someone had shot a photo of you or your outfit before, but never this many.

You were barely five minutes into the paddock when the first question came—not for a quote, not about his suit or his styling, but about you.

“Excuse me—” A reporter stepped into your path, microphone in hand. “Can we get a quick comment?”

You blinked, caught off guard. “I—uh, I don’t really—”

“You and Lando Norris seem close. Should fans be reading into that?”

Your stomach tightened. “I’m just here for work.”

“Come on,” the reporter pressed, a smirk playing on his lips. “No truth to the rumors? No secret romance?”

Before you could respond, a familiar hand landed on your lower back, a firm presence against you.

“That’s enough,” Lando’s voice cut in, smooth but commanding.

The reporter’s smirk faltered. “Just doing my job.”

“Then ask about racing,” Lando replied easily, guiding you past them with a subtle grip. He didn’t drop his hand until you were inside the McLaren hospitality, away from prying eyes.

You exhaled sharply, shaking your head. “That was ridiculous.”

Lando leaned against the counter, watching you. “You okay?”

You nodded, even though your pulse was still racing. “I just—ugh. This is exactly what I didn’t want.” You really wanted to be professional, working at LV.

He studied you for a moment before sighing. “Just stay in hospitality for the rest of the day.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but the look he gave you made it clear—he wasn’t asking.

“I’ll get them to back off,” he added, jaw clenched. “But just stay in here.”

So, you stayed.

Hours later, as you were going over some last-minute details, Max leaned against the counter beside you, an amused smirk on his face.

“You know why they’re all watching you noe, right?”

You glanced up. “Because reporters are vultures?”

Max chuckled.“Well, yeah. But also because Lando’s stopped screwing around.”

Your blinked. “What?”

Max shrugged. “Think about it. Lando’s always had random girls floating around, models, party girls, but for the past couple weeks? Nothing. Just you. They noticed.”

You stared at Max, throat suddenly dry.

He shrugged. “I just think it’s funny you haven’t noticed.”

-

That night after the race, you were at the club with the McLaren team, Lando and you had discussed a plan.

“You sure about this?” he asked, tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Positive,” you replied. “Let’s give them something else to talk about.”

The plan was simple: flirt with other people, redirect the media’s attention, kill the narrative before it got too real.

You spotted a Red Bull engineer leaning against the bar and made your way over, offering a bright smile and just the right amount of laughter. Lando, meanwhile, let himself get cornered by two models who clearly didn’t care about F1.

From across the club, your eyes met. And held.

His jaw tightened.

You quickly turned back, not wanting to see him with the girls, focusing on the guy in front of you, lightly touching his arm and whispering something in his ear. 

Ten minutes later, your phone buzzed.

Lando: Come outside. Now.

The moment you stepped outside, the cool air hit you—followed immediately by Lando.

“Bad idea, we’re going home” he said, voice low, shaking his head. 

You nodded, the car ride back to the hotel was tense. Silent.

Inside your room, he shut the door behind him with a soft click. You turned to say something—anything—but he was already crossing the space between you.

Lando pressed you against the wall, mouth crashing against yours, all frustration and tension and unspoken words. His hands roamed over your body, gripping, claiming, desperate.

“I hated that,” he breathed, kissing down your neck.

“You told me to flirt,” you whispered, tilting your head back.

“I didn’t think I’d hate it this much.”

Your hands were already tugging at his jacket, your voice breathless. “I didn’t think I would either.”

His voice was low in the dark. “Is this what it’s going to be like?”

You swallowed. “What?”

“The press. The attention.” His voice was softer now, more serious. “Flirting with other people just to prove a point.”

You hesitated. “I just… I don’t know how to handle all of this.”

Lando exhaled, pressing his forehead against yours. “Then let me handle it.”

—

Except, it was Louis Vuitton who handled it when she got called in a few days later.

The rumor buzz hadn’t died down.

If anything, it had only gotten louder since the club night. The media had latched onto her like hungry wolves, headlines speculating everything from secret relationships to "McLaren’s mystery girl." She avoided the comments, scrolled past the tagged photos, but they lingered like smoke.

You walked into the office. The room was cool and modern, sterile in that corporate-chic way, and your boss was already seated, tablet in hand. Another woman you vaguely recognized from PR was leaning against the wall, arms crossed casually.

“Take a seat,” she said said, not unkindly. “This won’t take long.”

You sat, knees tightly together, palms on your thighs. Trying not to look like you were bracing yourself.

“We’re moving you,” she said. “It’s a good thing.”

“Moving me where?”

“To the new Real Madrid partnership team. It’s a big rollout, very high profile. We need sharp people on it.” Her tone was firm but complimentary. “You’ve done good work. This is a step up.”

Your stomach fluttered. This should’ve been a dream. A high-profile campaign. A nod from the top. 

You nodded, forcing a small smile. “Thank you. I appreciate the opportunity.”

The woman from PR spoke then, casual, almost teasing. “Just, a word of advice, at Louis Vuitton we do not mix our personal interests with our clientele.” Her smirk didn’t quite reach her eyes. “You’ve got real talent. Would be a shame.”

It was framed as a reward. And it was, in a way. But the subtext was loud and clear.

“We’ll loop you in with the Madrid team this week,” Marta said, already looking at her tablet again. “Exciting times.”

“Absolutely,” you murmured, already halfway out the door.

You didn’t let herself breathe until you were outside. 

You realized how lucky you were you got a promotion instead of being fired at your dream job, and you hated the fact you had almost messed it up.

—

WN: Im back???!!! I still have many chapters for this story in my drafts so i would like to finish it, so sorry for the long break!! Might even finish my other story or write one shots/shorter stories, requests welcome xx

tl: @freyathehuntress @linnygirl09 @sarx164 @joannaln4 @widow-cevans @444-leqz @laneyspaulding19 @mayax2o07@n3versatisfied @anayaverse @tvdtw4ever @honethatty12 @meyla123x @liz140569

[m0chisenpai]

lestat x black female reader

inspired by ep 1 where lestat invites louis and lily, but here it would be reader and lily where they are friends and lestat just uses lily to finally have reader 🤭

fascinating

˚｡⋆ lestat de lioncourt x black!fem!reader

in which you are the most fascinating being of the night

You were a fly on the wall when it came to Lily and her business. And you intended to remain the same, though you boarded in the same home as she, and the rest of her working girls did. You refused to partake in the business.

You were a…muscle of sorts. Though you could hardly overpower the men who she saw all you needed to do was scream for someone and the men would be sent right out without question.

You could never partake in the business of pleasure, it was not something that drew you in.

Truth be told the touch of a man made you feel ill. Not that you preferred the company of women, but the men who came in for Lily wanted one thing merely and that was to waste their seed and forget about their problems at home.

You could see right past their imported rings, their custom tailored suits. It was all a ruse to mask the broken little boys deep in their souls, but tonight Lily insisted you enjoy the music out on the patio while she handled her ‘business.’

This was typical, you kept her clients company while she got ready or wrapped up a previous one. She offered a portion of her earnings to you but you declined. But tonight you were in need of the funds for a new new novels you'd had your eyes on.

“I need you to keep an eye out for my next appointment love please?”

You hum turning your head rested in the palm of your hand to look at her.

And from the look in her eye you grumble like a child. “Not Lawrence again he is such dull company.”

“No now if he were coming I’d tell you to pick your book up and come. No this ones a French white,” she whispers it like a scandal and you will admit your interests are peaked.

“A french man Lily. What’s his name and what’s he look like?”

“Oh he’s got these dreamy blue eyes, golden locks. He knows to meet me up here, but you'll keep him entertained for me love won’t you?” When she holds your hands and pouts her lip you sigh and agree and she’s squealing and promising a treat on her next night.

You'll hold her to it.

When she’s gone your eyes return to the book, the light music spilling from the night sets the perfect ambiance for you to read from the tattered pages. You enjoy your little bubble in peace, oblivious to the man who now sits in front of you. Watching, drinking in your calming aura. It brings peace to his own mind.

It isn’t until his cane knocks into the table that you pick your head up to meet the most beautiful of eyes. This man is unlike the others. No, he is special. When you tilt your head ever so slightly he mirrors it back.

“I hope I am not of a disturbance, madame.”

“No,” your wet your lips finding your voice. “You must be looking for Lily. She should be ready for you in a moment I can alert her-“ When you go to stand his hand comes down upon the hand atop your book. But it is gentle, and it stops you.

“No please, I would prefer your company tonight.”

Oh now this was new, your eyebrow raises but your hand does not move from beneath his own. It is cold, but it is comforting in the humid evening. “I do not warm beds sir, if you’d like I can find you another woman to provide you the company you desire?”

“I think the company you offer surpasses any woman’s here, please sit. I will even pay you for your time.”

You hesitate for. A moment, but the extra money could provide you just enough for the new novel you’d been in search of. So you sit, crossing one leg over another.

“Where are my manners, what am I to call you madame?”

You offer your name and he whispers it back. “Lestat De Lioncourt, but for you my dear, Lestat.”

His answers are vague to your questions. She comes from France, from money passed on from a father. His mother travels the world since the passing of said father, and he finds himself in love with New Orleans.

“But enough about myself what-“

“Mr Lioncourt!” When Lily comes the tiniest bit of disappointment fills you. But Lestat’s eyes do not move when you dearest Lily returns by your side.

“Lily you did no tell me you had such interesting company around here.”

“I told you she is, she would rack in a fortune-“

“But I do not like the feeling of a man. It makes me…” you shake your head but Lily’s hand on your hand provides you comfort. Cause she knows, a secret that built the bridge of your sisterhood.

“Well I will leave you both to it, I’m gonna check in with Madame, Lily, you fine by yourself?”

“Of course, Mr.Lioncourt is my last of the night then we can go to that new cafe.” You stand, book in hand to walk past but Lestat’s hand holds your elbow. Had it been any other man your instinct would be to step aside out of their grasp.

But his hand does not feel like fire on you. And he drops a ring in your hand, a fortune which he lays his hand atop.

“Will this suffice?”

“Yes, thank you Lestat.” You smile and move to leave his hand dropping from your hand. Yet his gaze does to leave until you are completely out of sight.

Lestat begins to buy up Lily’s time, to the point where she hardly can see others. She wasn’t comparing the man paid her extremely well from what you could tell, enough that she was giving you a portion her earnings.

“I just feel bad, dragging you to and from. But I think he is sweet on you love.”

“He is not.” You giggle as she bumps into your side as you walk to the mans home, your elbows linked and walking slow enjoying this rare moment of peace with one another.

“He is! You know….” She leans up to speak into your ear, “I think he pretends it is you some nights.”

“You and your imagination Lil,” she giggles right until he is meeting you at the iron gates and letting the both of you in. It was always the same, he offers you both a drink, you speak for a bit, the two go upstairs while you drown the noise out with a song on the record or one of Lestat's novels from his collection, then Lily walks you both back home.

But tonight it was as though the two knew something. Because when she passes Lestat the gaze they exchange is....mischievous? Perhaps she has found a new trick for him. Lily pauses in the doorway cursing beneath her breath when you are shedding your coat.

“I left my compact at Lawrences love I’ll be right back!” And she’s dashing out the door before you can run after her. Lestat closes the door just when your hand reaches for the knob and your looking at him, chest to chest, eyes wide as a does in embarrassment.

“I hope I am good company,” he holds his hand to you. And you lay your hand in his, letting him lead you into the parlor. Two glasses await you before the lit fireplace.

”When have you ever proven to be dull company, Les?”

The record plays the softest of music, dare you say romantic.

The setting feels too intimate, especially as he places his hand now to the small of your back nudging you to join him on the couch beside him where he sits close, closer than most do. But you attribute it to his heritage. He was always more touchy, cold skin was something you were used to and never flinched at when you felt it.

He deposits a glass, half filled into your hands and clinks your glasses together. You take a slow sip. It’s a smooth red that warms your bones and you set it back down. When you look up at him, his gaze is settled on you, almost loving. Too kind for your linking to you settle on looking at the spot between his eyes.

“Do you find my company a nuisance?” He tilts his head, and a furrow creases the perfect marble of his skin. “Because I can’t offer you what Lily has. I’m sorry.”

“Au contraire,” his hand slips into your own, lifting it to press a kiss to your hand. “ Your company offers me something hers does not.”

Now it is your turn to be confused and you tilt your head. He continues, “Your questions. Your thoughts. Your hunger and desire to know the things beyond man and God. You hunger for something more.” As he speaks his hand rests across your bare chest, where your heart beats beneath his cold palm.

”It is here. And I too had such desires. Until it brought you to me. My answered prayer. The one who alone can satisfy this hunger.” You don’t realize how your body seems to draw closer. Your own hand resting where his heart should beat.

You should feel sick, you should be broken. No man can fill the void of your heart. “You were never broken, your soul knew what your flesh knew not. It needed me.”

When you go to move back his hand rests at the back of your neck, but it is gentle. His hand are always so gentle. “How did you know.”

”Because my love. We were meant to be, to be companions for a lifetime, no, for lifetimes to come.”

You don’t know why it feels so hard to breathe. But he is sliding another ring from his pinky, and he drops it into your hand, curling your hands around it to hold between both his hands.

“Be my companion, my love, let me fulfill every desire these mortal men have neglected. Please,” he whispers your name like a prayer. He's not like him, the one who left you broken. No. Lestat does not look at you in such a way. You are not damaged goods, no. You are the pieces of a broken promise.

And he intends to fix it. He intends to remedy every single thought, every way those mortal boys have misused you. Tears fill your eyes, sliding down the slopes of your cheeks. You can only slowly nod.

And he is devouring your lips, the flames burn higher.

”Oh love!” Lily squeals seeing you at your normal spot. Your back is to her, hair pinned up in a gorgeous crown braid with silk ribbon. It had been some time since you returned. Whispers spread that you eloped, that you ran off to France, hopped a train to New York with some man.

but Lily long since told you needed a break. Though her heart did drop when she returned one day to a simple letter of your departure, she was reassured by the set date of your return for the fall.

And here you sit unbothered by the chill.

“Lily,” your voice is so smooth, had you always sounded like that? When she is able to see you, you look up at her.

Golden eyes, stare into her brown ones.

[ssa-dado]

Breaking down Hotch's apartment layout until someone from Criminal Minds slides into my DMs with the damn floorplans

- CASE BRIEFING: HOW HOTCH'S APARTMENT GASLIT US ALL

As an architecture student, I have a very strong (borderline obsessive) interest in analyzing spaces and locations... especially when they don’t quite add up. And one that has always messed with my brain (sometimes in a good way, but mostly in a frustrating way) is Hotch’s apartment from seasons 4–11.

The transformation from the bare, depressing space in s5 to the warm, cozy atmosphere with antique furniture and clever spatial tricks later on… it’s fascinating.

But also confusing as hell.

Because one question has always haunted me:

Is the apartment we see in Season 4/5 (where Hotch was stabbed and possibly SA’d) the same one he’s living in by Season 10?

(And since I’m a visual learner, here are the pics, because this mystery needs solving... I'll try my best)

(05x01 ; 10x05 don't zoom in, you freaks)

Seems easy to solve, right? The civil number is the same! Great.

121

...But hold on - what’s this?

(07x23)

...Damn, Aaron, your mailman must be going through it - 121? 123? Pick a struggle.

So… is it the same apartment or not? Because at this point, I’m losing my mind.

- VICTIMOLOGY (TYPOLOGY)

As you all know, the starting point is always victimology—but in architecture, my go-to is typology.

So, what kind of apartment building does Hotch live in?

Because once we figure that out, we can finally make sense of all the architectural crimes committed in his apartment.

We get a glimpse of his building in 5x02, and - without dragging you through a full historical deep dive (unless you want me to, in which case, buckle up) - here’s what we do know: it looks like this...

The building looks pre-WWII, likely built in the late 1920s–1930s, or designed more recently to mimic that era.

My guess is primarily based on the architectural detailing of the ground floor - the stonework, arches, and classical elements that give it a grander, more “expensive” look - and the distinct visual separation from the upper levels.

Spencer Reid moment - you can skip it if you'd like -> This actually follows a common design principle (partly influenced by Louis Sullivan’s theories) where different sections of a building reflect their function. The ground floor, being more public-facing, is more decorative and inviting, while the upper floors (where the apartments are) are plainer, emphasizing privacy.

However, the upper levels look stripped down, almost too plain, like they went through a more recent renovation that removed some of the og character. While it was normal in the 1920s/30s to emphasize the lower level, the upper floors would still have had some kind of textured finish brick, terracotta, or even decorative stone accents. Instead, here, it looks like someone just painted over everything... a bit sad, honestly… much like the man living in one of these apartments. Sorry Hotch but it is the truth.

That said, based on the photos, I hypothesized a possible volumetry diagram and main floor plan of the apartment building, including its functions and layout.

Knowing that Hotch lives in 121 (or 123… whatever it is today), he could very well be on the first floor. Old man isn’t about to risk climbing seven flights of stairs, understandable.

(Or, if we lean into the conspiracy theory that he has childhood trauma related to fire, it’s very telling that he chose a first-floor unit, making for an easier escape in case of danger…)

Our lovely Emily Prentiss gave us a sneak peek at the ground floor interior in 5x01, which - combined with a study of the window placement on the facade - helped me piece together a small section of the central layout.

From what we see, I feel even more confident about the building’s era - especially because of the beautiful wooden decorated elevators (yes, those are elevators, not doors... check the buttons on the side)

And now, for another Spencer Reid moment, part two -> In the early 1900s, when elevators were first being introduced in residential buildings, they didn’t look like the modern ones we see today.

Why?

Because men fear change.

Just like with any new technology, people were hesitant, so architects and designers made elevators blend in by disguising them as something more familiar - often looking like grand wooden doors or classic entryways rather than the industrial metal boxes we think of today.

This same pattern happened with building structures - steel (and concrete too!) was widely adopted in the early 1900s because of its strength, allowing for taller buildings, but architects still hid the steel frame behind stone or brick facades to maintain the look of traditional palaces. Even early cars looked like carriages because people weren’t ready to embrace a completely new form.

So, Hotch’s apartment building? It’s yet another classic case of early 20th-century architectural reluctance to embrace modernity - which, honestly, fits him a little too well. The man bottles up his emotions behind the calmest face just like his home hides its innovations behind classic detailing.

I see you, Aaron. You’re not fooling me.

Now, you may be asking - "Phi, weren’t you supposed to expose all the inconsistencies in Hotch’s apartment and finally solve whether it’s the same place or if they changed it?"

To that, I say… we’re getting there.

Because before we dive into the madness, there’s something that really messes with my brain - the window placement in Hotch’s apartment.

But to even begin analyzing that, we first need to understand how a typical floor plan in a building like this would be structured. And once again, our queen Emily Prentiss in 5x01 unknowingly led us straight to the answer.

The bastard even has a vaulted ceiling - right where I believe the main distribution area (aka elevators and stairs) is located. You can spot it in the pictures near the exit signs.

Also, just a heads-up... in the diagrams, the apartments look smaller than they actually are because I was too lazy to make multiple detailed drawings. (But hey, if someone paid me - hi, CM - I absolutely would) So, for now, I’m using that as a quick reference.

Now… the interior! Or should I say… the everchanging interior.

In this issue, I’ll be analyzing the Season 5 version - I even sketched out a small section of the floor plan (which could be completely wrong, because things change every episode).

From these pics, we can see that his windows are on the opposite side of the entrance - which, so far, checks out.

But wait... look down here! Check out the window placement in the kitchen. Thanks to that little detail, we can hypothesize that Hotch’s apartment is located in what I’ve labeled as "Unit B" - aka the unit with double exposure (great for ventilation, Aaron, solid choice).

From this pic down here from the s4 finale, we also get a fun little bonus detail - there’s what looks like a tiny dryer (or washing machine?) just sitting out in plain sight. And right behind Hotch, there’s a door that, based on the dimensions, I suspect leads to a bathroom.

Enough details to sketch out a partial floor plan… and there you have it!

A (partial) floor plan of Hotch’s apartment in its saddest era: bare, empty, and drowning in case files from seasons 4–5

And seeing more of his apartment in later seasons should be a blessing, right? It should help us map out the whole thing, right?...

Right?

...Wait.

Is that... a full-ass door on the right that totally wasn’t there before?!

Aaron, you hypocrite - you shut down Spencer Reid’s physics magic, yet here you are summoning entire new rooms into existence in your apartment.

(05x02 ; 10x05)

Alright, fine... where does that door lead?

(10x20)

Hot damn.

Referring to the home office, of course… and here’s some solid proof of its placement. Now, I’m gonna… step away for a minute… process... this... architectural betrayal… but YOU - you make sure to study these pics. I’ll be quizzing you later, got it?

Alright… and now… now that you’ve hopefully been studying (and totally not getting distracted by Hotch’s shirt hanging on for dear life - OMG LOOK AT THE [REDACTED])… focus.

You nasty.

Window placement.

Where’s the home office window? Exactly... on the same side as the others in the living and dining area (you can tell by the way the light enters the room in the pic on the right)

And since you’re all very interested in the architecture (and definitely not drooling over a certain Unit Chief), let me ask you this:

WHY THE HELL IS THERE A WHOLE FIREPLACE IN HIS HOME OFFICE?!

Don’t worry - I’ll answer for you. Since y’all are nasty.

Can I just say that it UPSETS ME to the point where I’m considering a 30-day diet of just drywall that THAT MAN - THAT FEDERAL AGENT - HAS A FIREPLACE. IN HIS HOME OFFICE.

(HELLO?!?!?!?!?? Whore.)

Unhinged. Because:

1. A fireplace is quite literally a symbol of family and warmth (fun fact: Frank Lloyd Wright always designed homes starting with the fireplace! Oh, wait. You might not know who that is, so now this just sounds confusing. My bad. Anyway, he designed a lot of cool stuff... moving on). A fireplace belongs in a living room or dining area, where people actually gather. And considering Hotch’s building is old, there is no way it was originally designed to have one in a private office. That placement is categorically wrong. You’re a terrible designer if you stick a fireplace in an isolated office but not in the main living space where it actually makes sense.

2. The writers could try to lie to my face and say, “Oh, maybe the room was repurposed into Hotch’s home office.”Wrong. His apartment has a big open-concept living/dining area with the kitchen on the side. And unless his place is secretly Rossi’s mansion (spoiler: it’s not), there’s no way the original layout had a separate formal dining room. And even if it did, the fireplace is still in the wrong damn place because formal dining rooms are typically closer to the entry.

3. They could lie even harder and try to argue that Hotch having a fireplace in his office is some deep, symbolic artistic choice - like, oh, he’s so devoted to his job, he’d rather warm his ass doing paperwork than sit by the fire reading Jack a bedtime story like a decent human being. Like. Come on. He’s a family man, for god’s sake. Either give him a properly placed fireplace or JUST DON’T GIVE HIM ONE AT ALL.

(Less is more, people!!! Unless, of course, we’re talking about Hotch’s [REDACTED]... oof. Damn censorship. Right when I was about to say something deeply unholy. )

Goodbye. See you in the next issue.

Hopefully by the end of this series we'll manage to sketch down the entire floorplan

Phi.

[twopoppies]

“Me best mate,” you say?

x

IIRC, the first time Louis mentioned ABBA was during his promo with Steve Aoki for JHO. He was asked what his guilty pleasure music was and he said ABBA. Jay had just passed the month before, and the thought of Harry singing these lyrics to Louis is so tender it makes me want to die.

Chiquitita

[Verse 1]

Chiquitita, tell me what's wrong

You're enchained by your own sorrow

In your eyes, there is no hope for tomorrow

How I hate to see you like this

There is no way you can deny it

I can see that you're oh, so sad, so quiet

[Verse 2]

Chiquitita, tell me the truth

I'm a shoulder you can cry on

Your best friend, I'm the one you must rely on

You were always sure of yourself

Now I see you broken and fettered

(How it hurts to see you cry)

(And how it hurts to see you sad)

I hope we can patch it up together

[Chorus]

Chiquitita, you and I know

How the heartaches come and they go

And the scars they're leaving

You'll be dancing once again

And the pain will end

You will have no time for grieving

Chiquitita, you and I cry

But the sun is still in the sky

And shining above you

(Even though you cry)

(The sun is shining in the sky)

Let me hear you sing once more

(So let me hear you sing some more)

Like you did before

(The way you used to do before)

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

Try once more, like you did before

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

[Verse 3]

So the walls came tumbling down

And your love's a blown-out candle

All is gone, and it seems too hard to handle

Chiquitita, tell me the truth

There is no way you can deny it

I see that you're oh, so sad, so quiet

[Chorus]

Chiquitita, you and I know

How the heartaches come and they go

And the scars they're leaving

(You and I, we know)

(How all the heartaches come and go)

You'll be dancing once again

(You’ll be dancing once again)

And the pain will end

(And all the pain you take will end)

You will have no time for grieving

Chiquitita, you and I cry

But the sun is still in the sky

And shining above you

(Even though you cry)

(The sun is shining in the sky)

Let me hear you sing once more

(So let me hear you sing some more)

Like you did before

(The way you used to do before)

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

Try once more, like you did before

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

[Outro]

Try once more, like you did before

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

[gum-toe-and-sole]

i have to speak my truth. as someone who has watched iwtv from the moment it came out in 2022 and has convinced 4/7 of my friends to watch as well…if jacob is not in AT LEAST 25% of the show i wont be watching. i know that the creators of the show have said louis will still be in the show but given what mark johnson has said recently and there being no black writers anymore, i do not have much hope. i love lestat/sam and im super excited to learn about lestat’s backstory. however, the most compelling part of the show TO ME is jacob’s portrayal of louis and the dynamic between loustat. even though i know the story is shifting, i really hope they remember why people started watching the show to begin with.

[sugurugetoshairbrush]

playing match-maker with professor!gojo satoru—”we can’t mind our business!” [nxt]

teaching is incredibly rewarding. nothing beats the sense of fulfillment that comes with educating the next generation—it gives you a sense of purpose and makes you feel like a contributing member of society. but recently, you've developed a guilty pleasure, an unhealthy vice. 

because, in truth, what you really find rewarding isn’t teaching. it’s the juicy gossip you share with your colleague, gojo satoru. 

it started innocently enough—quick whispers and passing speculations about students during breaks. then it escalated to frantic texts about classroom dramas. now, it’s a full-blown routine: coordinating your lunch breaks to debrief over an aptly chosen herbal tea at the café across the street.

gojo, the physics professor, is an instigator by nature. unfairly brilliant and chronically bored, he’s always looking for ways to entertain himself. you, an english professor with a manageable workload, were the perfect partner in crime. together, you’ve meddled in your students’ lives, and your escapades have become something of a shared hobby.

his preferred method of meddling is match-making, and to your credit you guys have had one successful match:

juniors, kasumi miwa and kokichi muta.

sweet, hardworking miwa was one of your favorite students, always putting extra effort into your creative writing assignments. muta, (aptly nick-named mechamaru) is a genius with mechanics and the president of the robotics club. gojo taught him quantum physics and claimed he was one of the sharpest students he’d ever met.

it started with a haiku.

you’d assigned miwa’s class a poetry assignment, and her submission, though simplistic, immediately caught your attention:

I may not love science, I can’t bring machines to life, yet I yearn for you.

if that wasn’t enough, there were faintly erased doodles of robots holding hands in the margins of her submitted assignments. around the same time, gojo noticed muta sitting strategically in his class so he could be visible through the window into yours. he angled his notes just enough to display his complex equations—clearly trying to impress miwa.

the moment you pieced it together, you texted gojo:

dr. gojo satoru: no way, her haiku is basically screaming I love him

you: lmao I asked her about the inspiration, and she said, “just a friend”

dr. gojo satoru: she’s gonna move on if we don’t act now!

you: what if we double-book office hours for them? “accidentally,” of course

dr. gojo satoru: omg brilliant, drafting the email rn XD

the plan worked. you and gojo “accidentally” scheduled them for office hours at the same time, then conveniently left them alone. miwa, stumped by an intentionally tricky writing assignment, was soon receiving help from muta. numbers were exchanged, tutoring sessions turned into hangouts, and four months later, they were officially dating.

now, every month, gojo extorts a cream puff from muta as a “thank you” for the setup from the pricey bakery downtown. you pretend to disapprove but always end up splitting the treat.

which brings you to your current predicament. you and gojo are locked in a heated debate about which first-year students to set up next. gojo insists itadori yuji and kugisaki nobara are the ideal pair, but you’re convinced yuji and fushiguro megumi are better suited. gojo’s conviction runs so deep he swears it’s ingrained in on an atomic level.

so to raise the stakes, gojo has wagered his louis vuitton messenger bag (est. value: $3k), while you’ve offered up your earnings from the third installment of your self-published ya novel (est. value: $4k). and yes, the fact that those numbers are so close in value is embarrassing.

desperate to prove each other wrong, you agree to consult your colleagues.

gojo’s first choice? philosophy professor getou suguru.

dr. gojo satoru added you and prof. getou suguru to a group chat

dr. gojo satoru named the group chat cupids <3

dr. gojo satoru: getouuuu dr. gojo satoru: getougetougetougetougetou

prof. getou suguru: this is highly unethical.

prof. getou suguru left the chat.

though getou pretends to be above your antics, he shows up to join you in gojo’s office later, coffee in hand and smirking. he brushes a finger across the desk and frowns at the dust.

“if I were willing to entertain your ridiculous game—which I’m not—I’d say megumi and yuji are the better match,” he declares, smugly.

he strolls to the whiteboard, sliding his glasses down from his forehead to settle over his eyes, his black bangs falling neatly into place, and begins sketching a diagram:

utilitarianism: will the act ultimately result in the best overall results—maximizing utility?

• megumi x yuji: opposing personalities balance each other out, ultimately improving their weaknesses. ↳ e.g. megumi silences yuji when he talks over the lecture, while yuji incites megumi to participate more during group projects, increasing his participation.

• nobara x yuji: similar personalities embolden bad habits, ultimately leading to chaos. ↳ e.g. nobara and yuji are rarely late individually, but when they hang out, they end up coming to class late, usually carrying coffee, and snacks.

getou pops the cap back on and crosses his arms, “I rest my case.”

you cheer while gojo groans, insisting getou’s biased.

determined to recruit an ally, gojo drags you to statistics professor nanami kento, the epitome of calm professionalism. confident in his plan, gojo smirks and declares, “once nanami agrees with me, the resident genius, your theory will come to a grinding halt—no momentum, no inertia, just friction stopping you in your tracks.”

nanami’s sitting at his desk engrossed in grading assignments when you all appear in the doorframe. his brown oxfords shined, speckled tie flung loose over his shoulder.

when he notices your presence, he pointedly checks his watch before stating, “you’ve got ten minutes, for,” he gestures, “whatever this is, I leave at six.”

you explain the predicament and nanami rolls his eyes, rubbing at his temples like he’d just got a headache. “sounds like simple probability, for example,” he rises to pick up a piece of chalk from his blackboard:

p (a) = # of favorable outcomes / # of possible outcomes

p (a) represents the probability of event “a”, megumi and yuji coupling up

he draws a number here, a letter there—the equation is getting increasingly hard to follow, even gojo looks dumbfounded. 

“two, carry the one. and you get…” he starts completing the result:

p (a) = f(u)<k 0ff

he deadpans, the mirth visible in his eyes, “you guys really thought I’d help you with your childish endeavor, has anyone ever told you to simply just mind your own.”

you huff out offended, “we can’t mind our business! come on, don’t be like that. aren’t you close with yuji, being his advisor and all, you should want the best for him!”

nanami sighs, glancing down again at his watch. five more minutes. he approaches you and flips open his phone, scrolling for a couple seconds. 

“here look,” he tilts the screen showing a text thread with yuji:

itadori yuji (freshman): sensei can I ask you something?

nanami k.: what can I do for you itadori? 

itadori yuji (freshman): you know how I’m undeclared? well, I love spending time with friends. is it okay for their interests to influence my major?

nanami k.: while the choice should ultimately be your decision itadori, it is only natural that your environment and experiences influence the line of thinking that leads to that decision. which of your peers have you found most influential? 

itadori yuji (freshman): I don’t wanna say because I don’t think they realize how much I look up to, and respect them. I’m scared I’ll psyche them out. but they’re terrific: driven, independent, and forthright.

nanami k.: well if those traits are any indicator they seem like a strong, positive influence to your academics.

you finish reading and you all share a look. you start, “okay so, I think I’m confident that with yuji’s messages in mind, we all think, no, are certain, that yuji’s ideal match is…”

“megumi!”

“nobara.”

“megumi!”

“nobara!”

and so, you once again, begin considering who might be the next best person to consult for an additional perspective.

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊ back in their dorms, megumi, yuji, and nobara can’t stop sneezing, the sheer weight of being so heavily discussed tickling their senses.