#what is that blatant lie and why do they all lie and be so hypocritical

[autisticlee]

conservatives: the trans are mutilating their bodies in the name of the religion called Wokeism and are indoctrinating our children to force them to be trans! it's all an agenda they're doing together to take over our country!

me, who found out I was trans on my own with no other trans people in my life, while being trans alone to this day, while also hating religions, and not doing Any Of That: What The Actual Fuck™ 😐

[notokbutthriving]

addition to the Castor isn't an astral thing

so I was thinking about how the best person to corrupt right now would actually be Castor cus he can see anywhere in the universe and could act as a spy amongst the astrals.

Then I realized why the hell isn't Castor just telling the astrals where the negative star beings are?! Technically he could find every one of them and boom jobs done!

Castor is not particularly fond of the other astrals, nor are they of him, but even so he still does his job! So why leave such an obvious oversight?

Well, there's a possibility that Castor is already working with the negative entities, the astrals are working with at least Cetus to gain more control, or everything is a lie and the astrals are just some random group lying and manipulating everyone so they can rule the universe.

Kinda just spitballing with the last one there but if Castor were to be working with the negative entities it would certainly explain every instance of Castor never noticing anything wrong until it's too late. [Rez talking to Lunar at any point, the beast attacking Lunar, Dazzle, and Jack, Rez talking to Earth, the corrupted rats in the shipping area, Rez corrupting Razzle, Rez reviving the creator, Lunar using dark star power at any point, Lunar getting broken out of jail, being unable to find Lunar after he was left in Russia, couldn't stop Lunar from killing Eclipse, literally not 'knowing' Rez existed] so Castor doesn't have the best track record with effectively using his powers, but it almost makes sense if he was purposely turning a blind eye. Additionally, Castor has very clearly stated dislike towards the other astrals, blatant distrust towards Taurus, heavy apprehension towards Libra, and an almost stilted way of talking to his sister [this also covers why he can be mean to Nebula, especially at first, due to a need for control] which would explain possible motivations for working with the negative astrals, as well as why he seems more effected by emotions. But that does leave him a hypocrite towards Lunar.

Unless he's scared Lunar will follow his footsteps.

Castor mentioned that Rez lies, manipulates the narrative, but how would he know that? Officially, Gemini has only met Rez once, but Castor seemed to know more than he should. So it would make sense if they'd met before, and if we consider that Castor might be working with Rez, however unwillingly, it'd make sense.

Were the astrals to work with cetus and the others then there's a possibility it's all an act, the negative and positive astrals are two different sides but they're still the same coin, so it could make sense that they were actually working together [the kinda vibe being if we save people they'll like us so let's get the people in trouble so we can 'save' them] this does leave their motivations. Cause as it is, there doesn't seem to be any reason why they'd do this, let alone keep up the ruse this long.

Unless the astrals aren't even what they say they are. Unless they're not actually great beings that are made of the very lifeblood of the universe but just an alien civilization seeking power. But even then, that is a very weak motivation and leaves plenty of iffy-ness with their legitimacy and plot relevance.

Of everything listed the above the most probable appears to be that Castor either willingly works with the negative astrals or was coerced into doing so.

That, or, and this was originally a silly idea I had that was completely unsupported by both tsbs and myth, Castor could be Cetus's son.

[Aliteration go crazy]

[codfanficedits]

Don't fall in love - Part two.

Summary:

You get warned not to fall in love with Ghost, but you did anyways. Turning this into a little series!

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x fem!Reader

Wordcount: 916 | Rating: E (18+ only!)

Warnings: a little bit of angst - swearing

Part One here

‘Don’t fall in love with him.’

And you can’t fall in love with something you can’t see, at least that is what you’re telling yourself as you avoid him. Memorizing how his footsteps sound like so you know when to slip out of rooms, to leave gatherings whenever your ears pick up the heavy steps. But you can’t avoid him forever, not matter how hard you try. The most hypocritical part? You’re hurt when he doesn’t look at you during a mission briefing. And now you understand the women you’ve seen crying about him before, because it seems like Ghost hold your whole being in the palm of his hand, only to crush it when he refuses to acknowledge you’re even there. Why are you craving his validation so much while you’re the person who turned him down, who left first? Why do these feelings have to be so complicated?

It isn’t until the briefing is dismissed that he finally looks at you and again you don’t know how to handle it, why do you want him to look at you and why do you want to look away at the same time. The cold air that he leaves behind when he walks past you without giving you a crumb of attention hurts into the core of your soul and you can feel the hot tears burn behind your eyes, but you refuse it. You refuse to become one of the women who were stupid enough to fall in love with him and cry about it, after all, you did get warned about it.

You feel regret whenever you remind yourself that you were the one who left him that night, because now your mind can torture you with things that could’ve been, but never happened because you decided to leave. You’re so lost in thought that you nearly bump into a large back. One you could recognize from afar.

Ghost turns around, those beautiful brown eyes are cold, harsh behind his mask.

“You’re avoiding me.”

“Am not.” You protest, although the both of you know it’s a blatant lie.

His eyes narrow, before he shakes his head. “Was it something I did?”

It’s a question that caught you off guard. The vulnerability in his voice wasn’t something you expected to hear, you had expected anger, coldness, hate maybe even, but not this. The man who you were warned about, stood before you, a strain on his voice as he asked you the question that had been haunting his heart for days now.

Ghost wanted to pull up the walls again, shut you out, move on to the next. But Simon needed to know, Simon couldn’t take your silence, a rejection that stabbed him through his heart. Because there were two longings inside of him, and one was fighting with the other. Simon wanted to be loved and Ghost wanted to be always alone.

Because Simon dreams of conversations Ghost never get to have. He is unable to take the silence anymore, the guilt growing rapid in him.

“Please. God, don’t tell me I did do anything you didn’t want.”

What? You’re confused. Is that what he is thinking? Now it’s your turn to feel the guilt inside of you grow. You were so caught up with your own feelings, you never took his feelings into account, after all, you were warned about him, to not fall in love with him.

He takes off his mask, the balaclava following after. A look of distress on his face as he runs a hand through that dirty blonde hair.

“Because if I did, I’m so sorry. I really thought you were into it too, and I never meant to push you over any of your boundaries.” The words spill out of him as water spills out of a breaking dam.

“Stop.”

Silence

“You didn’t do anything I didn’t want.” You reassure him.

“Then why?” The same strain on his voice again, a look of hurt on his face. But how can you tell him how you feel without giving him the ability to completely destroy you?

“Why do you avoid me?” He asks again, because Simon wanted to know what made him so unlovable.

“They told me not to fall in love with you.”

 “Why?” The look of hurt changes to one of disbelief.

“Because you break hearts!” A reproach towards him.

“I’m the one breaking hearts? I had to wake up in an empty bed while you promised to stay the night!”

Why did it bother him so much? You had heard the stories about him kicking women out right after he had reached his orgasm. He shouldn’t care at all.

“Why do you even care at all?” You snap back at him, trying to keep your own feelings hidden by going for the attack.

“Because I wanted you to be different.”

Silence.

You don’t know what to say, you’ve been so keen on telling yourself you couldn’t fall in love with him, that you never ever saw the opportunity that the feelings could be mutual.

“Fuck.” His voice is strained at all. “Say something.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?”

“I’m sorry I left that night.”

A pained laugh escapes him. “Fuck. That’s not what this is about.” He shakes his head. “You know what? Forget I said a fucking thing.” He hisses before he turns around on his heels, leaving you behind. And you can’t help but feel as if you showed that you cared too late.

[rachelsshowerthoughts]

Not Aware AU exactly but kinda tangential. I always toyed with this idea of "Kagami was transferred into Adrien's class when she joined the school."

This could be in S2, or be because Tomoe saw Adrien was attending school and she's got those later season machinations & sends Kagami to make sure he's not snagged by a gold digger.

(In the former case its just in S2, while in the latter it starts after Princess Fragrance.)

This was fine and fun at first, but Kagami is more willing to start shit with Chloe & much less patient with Adrien's continued softness.

Plus, Adrien can't really explain why he's fond of Chloe cos its a mixture between he can't imagine his life without her (Sibling coded) & stuff like, "She was there for me when mom disappeared & got me into school".

This leads to her at some point losing her patience and dragging both off to a classroom and basically saying "Either she needs to improve or you need to drop her, because this cannot go on."

You'd expect it to be a two on one but Adrien's efforts to play peacemaker lead to Kagami arguing with him as well.

Then when one of Chloe's major blows lands hard against Adrien, "Our parents harm more people every day than I do in a year and you still love them, hypocrites!"

It does nothing to Kagami, because she doesn't love her mother, she respects her, obeys her and fears her wrath but she doesn't love her even a little and she assumed Adrien was the same.

He is not the same & is in fact kind of defensive of his father at such a blatant rejection of one's own family and how uncomfortable it makes him.

It basically descends from there, cos I love slow burns but sometimes its just like, "Hmm what if they all started screaming their issues that they do not realize are issues at the top of their lungs?"

None of these kids know therapy talk so their languages on it is already going to be shit even before we remember literally not a one of them has much in the way of healthy communication or good social skills outside of formal events so:

So you have Chloe defending stuff like destroying Roses' letter because "That's how Mama handles it when I give her bad gifts, she's telling me to do better and one day I'll get it right!" As well as "Why would Papa want to see me when he doesn't need me for something? He's not a lunatic control freak like your parents."

Then you have Adrien defending stuff like, "I know my dads cold and has impossible standards and barely lets me do anything I want but he is protective and just wants what's best for me!" & "My mom was always kind to me, she was perfect even if she never let me go out or have a birthday either!"

& Kagami defending Tomoe with, "It doesn't matter how I feel about Adrien, or my instructions, I act as I do because it is for the good of my family. My emotions, my life don't matter at all before that duty!"

So its just three incredibly fucked up abused kids steadily airing each others and their own families laundry list of abusive traits and experiences under the pretext of saying "No my family is normal & OK yours is the bad one" and "How dare you call 'that' bad, when your parent does this!"

(Also Chloe may think Gabriel killed Emilie or otherwise would rather have Adrien sealed in amber forever than as an actual living boy,)

With this continuing until it either gets physical or they basically collapse.

Meanwhile the class is just watching in mounting horror and disgust and discomfort. (Nino is likely especially pissed) Like even with Chloe it may not justify her behavior but it puts so much of it in a new deeply messed up context where it kind of makes sense she doesn't even know how to be nice.

To quote a friend of mine:

The rich kids have taken knives to each other. They've cut open their festering wounds. The rot is exposed, scrubbed raw. While they lie angry, bleeding, crying, and dying [inside], they have the opportunity to look upon themselves once more and apply new dressings.

I can see it, but unless Gabriel is ACTUALLY out of the country, all three get Akumatized. My thoughts are a weird mix Grimm Brothers Fairytales - Cinderella, Snow White, Hansel & Gretel, etc. Not in specific, but like. More fairytale tropes?

Adrien is the "Cinderella"-style. Rapunzel, Snow White-style, "One Day My Prince Will Come"-style. The type of character that has to sacrifice and sacrifice, and will eventually be rewarded. If he does one more photo shoot, one more public appearance, *scrubs one more floor*, his father will finally love him. He'll finally have the happy ending he wants. He just has to stick it out - cause his dad DOES love him, right? (As a possession, if at all.)

Chloé is more of the "Trials"-style. Complete this mission-style. Knit twelve sweaters from nettles, and your brothers will become human again. Find the right goose, and get set free. Defeat the evil witch, and the spell is broken. If Chloé tries hard enough, does and says the right things, her parents will love her, show her affection. She'll finally be worth something. (All of it performative and shallow, until they raise the bar to another impossible height. Always keeping her dependant on them.)

Kagami, weirdly, I see as more endurance, or contract style - like a flipped version of Adrien. She isn’t really trying to "change" her situation the way Chloé or Adrien are, (for value of "trying to change it", ie, playing along with their parents games because that’s all they know to do) she's accepted this is the way it is, and is simply trying to endure it. Go through the motions. Hold up your end of the bargain. Work within the bonds of your deal, to do as little harm as you can, while still fulfilling your end. One day, you'll be out. You'll be free. (As if her mother will ever set her free.)

[nevereverthem]

Gotham : Season 1 Episode 3

Earlier than I thought, here I am watching the third episode of the show.

Honestly, I can't wait to see what happens with Oswald because dude kidnapped a guy to ask for ransom... that he did not get. 🤣😭 I'm still not over the mother not believing it AT ALL.

My silly little crush wants to see Alfred so much! 🙄 I'm also all for having Brucey in his emo phase as I like to call it. I know that's not it, but just the 10 seconds frame of Bruce listening to metal-ish singers while doodling on a piece of paper was 🤌.

Selina is going to save her ass, but that sucks for the other kids though! She is one of the main characters, of course, but the other kids got their ass sent upstate! Don't you forget about that. 🥲

Anyway, here we go.

"There's a war coming..." Aaaaahhhhh! Honestly, starting the episode with Oswald's voice as a 'previously in Gotham' sort of thing, warms my heart. 😌

Gotham's streets... A bus... Oswald Cobblepot in a freaking pullover! Man is gonna be wearing a suit most of the time in the future. Let's enjoy these precious moments of him in casual clothing. 😌 The SMUDGE BLACK MAKEUP!! I know the man's got dark undereyes from exhaustion, but still.

Dude sees : Kids stealing a wallet from someone's back pocket. A cop taking money from an old asian guy. A man stealing a woman's bag. Prostitutes proposing their services to a person in a car... And all that Oswald is thinking is "home, sweet home". 🤣🤣😭😭

Okay, the story starting with a rich guy (Ronald Danzer) who did some shit. He's out on bail and plans on paying for his freedom and sneaking out to escape any problems. Like dude! That is sadly a great representation of how it works in real life too... 🙃

Balloons! And did you see that pig mask!? Foreshadowing I guess!? 😏

Oh MY! Cuffed to a balloon and being pulled up in the air!? That's so cool & terrifying at the same time. 😱

💥 INTRO TITLE ��

Not the same punch as Oswald stabbing someone in the neck, but we'll settle for it.

Jim! 😍

"No body. We're calling it a murder?" I mean... If the guy went up until there was no oxygen available and died... I suppose it is. 🤷‍♀️ We'll see. Or, if he went that far up and then fell... He probably died from the fall... somewhere. So, it would be a murder.

For once, agreeing with Harvey. The man kinda got "what he deserved". I mean... It's a bit strong... But he probably ruined lots of people's lives so...

Bill Cranston... Switches so fast to being angry to having a hypocritical smile on his face... Dude. X) Okay, so the guy does interviews by beating people down with a little statue? I... 🙃

Hey, that's what I said! Two people killed themselves because Ronald Danzer ruined them...

Oh! Jim bringing up the Mario Pepper case! Ah!

Selina! 😌

Did she really steal Harvey's PEN!? 🤣🤣

Selina "I can see in the dark" Kyle. x) Kitty cat Kat

I don't know why, but Jim and Selina facing eachother with both hands on their own hips just makes me laugh. x)

Selina cuffed to a staircase. Legit... She's using the pen she stole to free herself from the cuffs? Damn! Plus, payoff!

Jim in the sewer. Yuk! Shoes in dirty water.

"Son of a bitch! She was telling the truth." 🤣 (Reminds me of Dean from Supernatural iykyk)

"Oh, Detective!" in Selina's sing-song voice. 🤣🤣 How she throws him back the cuffs in the sewer!

Jim's groan of frustration. 🙄

Fish! Oh no, Lazlo got beaten hard damn. 😮

Fish directly telling Montoya and Allen that Jim killed Oswald. Bitch! 🤣🤣 I mean, great move though. That's technically what happened, although he didn't actually do it. I love when the 'bad guys' tell the truth and it does serve their interests.

"Jim Gordon pulled the trigger, but who gave the order?" Yeay! Mama tryna bring Falcone down!!

"I just want justice for little Oswald." 🤣🤣 I would believe the earth is flat more than that blatant lie! 🤣🤣

Speak of the devil... 🙄

Oswald counting coins... What did he do with the guy he kidnapped? For real, are we ever gonna know? I suppose he killed him, but I would like to get some real answers. 😅

Pocket knife. 😭😭 For food at least...

"Hey, Cobblepot! You're supposed to be dead." Fuck! I wasn't expecting that.

"I'm afraid you have me confused. My name is Dimitri-" Still, the way he talks... 🥵 Plus, did he try to pull off a fake accent? x)

Oh no! Each time Oswald pleads not to be killed is... 😮

"I couldn't stay away. Gotham is my home. It's my destiny. You don't see what's coming. I do. Gotham needs me. I'm its future." Dude sounds like a cult prophet. 🤣😭 He's right though. Foreshadowing at its MAX. x)

Ouch! Achilles tendon! 😮 Killed. By the way, how Oswald manages to get rid of guys who should have physical dominance over him always impresses me.

His teeny-tiny walk! 🐧

"Can I have a tuna sandwich please?" Aw, he can be so soft... when he's been so violent ten seconds before. Bro! 🙃 I love the callback to episode 1. The first time he slits the throat of a stranger to steal his sandwich. The second time, he kills a bad guy, takes his money and actually buys the sandwich. 😌 Can someone draw Ozzie eating a tuna sandwich? 🥹 I just love seeing characters do every day activities. 😌

Waynes' manor! 😍 Okay, I might just like little Brucey ☺️ and crush hard on Alfred. 🙄

Alfred teaching Bruce fencing? Aaww.

"En garde." Aaaahhhh! I know it's the actual term for the sport practice, but each time a character says a french word, I just melt! 🫠 I am french, so just hearing my language makes me somehow proud! And boy... I'm wet. 🤣🤣 Kidding, alright. But it's AWESOME!! Plus, that's Alfred who says it. 🙄🥰

And how is the actor so good at manipulating that cane (used as a replacement for the foil)!? I'm so impressed!

By the way, that scene must have been so much fun for Bruce's actor at the time. 😌

Alfred apologizing to the armor he accidentally hit. 🤣

*Alfred hitting Bruce on the thigh or butt, not sure* "That's gotta hurt." BITCH. 🤣🤣

How did Bruce got the police file of his parents' murder? Okay, he said it wasn't hard. I suppose he just payed them. But how? I don't know if he has access to his money on his own. He's 11. Doesn't he have to get Alfred's authorization or something because he is his legal guardian? Anyway. 🙄

Bruce "If I find a clue, I am" Wayne. 🥲

Jim scrapping mud from his shoes with a paper knife? x)

Montaya straight up asking Jim about him killing Oswald. Not wasting time with innuendos. Effective.

"I didn't kill him." Which is the ACTUAL TRUTH! That's the best part. x) He is both praised and condemned for something that he did not do! I like that SO MUCH! x)

Oswald searching for a job.

"You don't even have the right shoes." Him directly looking down behind at one of the staff's shoes and grinning evilly... Is he planning on killing for SHOES now!? 🙃🙃

By the way "Here, you're on your feet all day." Me, thinking about his bad leg. 🥲

Jim and Harvey arguing about the whole situation of the Waynes' murder...

"For the last time Gordon, let it go."

"Or what? Am I gonna be the next person taken out to the pier to get a bullet in the head?"

AH! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

OSWALD!! You actually really... The shoes. 😭😭

"What size are your shoes?" Blabla "What a coincidence!" 😭😭 His laugh. 😭😭

I CANNOT.

That reinforces the feeling that I have about the fisherman's sandwich scene... That was not Oswald's first murder... Surely not... And if it was... Dude's taking a long way down... 😭🙃

Right now, I'm just thinking about Oswald telling his story to Edward, like the very first steps he took into his villain career... That would be something. 🤣😭

The interview.

Oh, 4 balloons... Who are gonna be the three other supposed-to-be victims then? 🤔

"47$?" - "You're a disgrace to drug dealers." Okay, chuckled a bit. 🙄🙃

Cranston!? OMG, I did not even recognise the guy. 😱 Honestly... I don't really mind... We saw him once... But I don't think he really deserved the balloon thing... Man... That's tough...

Attached by the ankle is worse though.

In the night with a lot less witnesses too!

ALFRED! 😍😍 No, I won't shut up.

Bruce reading the newspaper. Yeah, totally doing that at 11. 🙃

Bruce, GIMME YOUR BREAKFAST! 😋 The lil' flower though. PLEASE!

"What's the new program? Trying to see how long you can go without eating anything? If that's the case I should save myself the trouble of making it." 🔥 DAMN! 🔥 I love how he doesn't miss a moment to shoot! x) By the way, Alfred... You can make breakfast for me. 🙄 Breakfast in bed? Breakfast in your bed... in OUR bed... 🙄

Alfred is trying SO HARD. 🥲😭

Gun holder, the gun, the tie, Jim's gaze straight into the camera aaaahhhh!! 😍 Man's going into battle!

Barbara! 🥰

"[newspaper talk] It says he killed a cop. You're not in danger, are you?" GIRL! Your man is a cop... in GOTHAM. He is in danger every second of his life!

"Everyone has to matter or nobody matters." -Jim Gordon. That did something to my heart. 💔❤️‍🩹

Barbara calling Jim a "hero" because he caught Mario Pepper for the Waynes' murder... That hits hard...

Jim talking about the fact that the balloon man's targets are dirty public figures... And Harvey going "Basically any elected official should stay indoors." is so legit. 😭😭

"Listen, one thing I know is how to find someone." Harvey chatting with prostitutes... I mean, he's not wrong! They can have a lot of informations. Tough job it is! Then he beats a guy down... Typical Harvey. 😅 Stopping to get food. TYPICAL HARVEY! That was the fastest summary of his character. x)

The SHOES. 😭😭 Oswald...

Him realising that he's been hired in a Mob boss owned restaurant! 🤣🤣 His FACE. 🤣🤣 Sorry Ozzie, but you deserve it a bit. "Don Maroni!"

"Great opportunity indeed." Oswald... I can't with him. x)

Harvey got so much informations about the guy they're searching for... Okay, I have to admit that's a damn skill! Respect.

DAMN! Harvey 'woman-handled', thrown around. I appreciate that. Sorry. 🙄

Lazlo being actually worried about Fish is so cute. 🥺

What!? Bitch is getting rid of some girl I didn't understand... AND Lazlo. I... 😭

Barbara. Oh hi Montoya!

Montoya HAS THE KEY!? DAMN!!

OMG yeah, Barbare is smoking... weed I suppose. Okay okay... 🤔

Talking about Jim...

"When we were together I did lie to you." I KNEW IT!! Former lovers! Aaaaahhhh

She's talking about being sober for a year etc... What she did blabla... What did Montoya DO!? 😮

Failed attempt at a kiss. I saw that coming. RIP.

Barbara being with another person (Jim) who might also be lying to her... The pattern is repeating itself... Girl must be feeling so down.

OMG the balloons are gonna pop? It's gonna rain bodies? 😭😭 Imagine you're going about your day and then a dead body falls from the sky... 😨

Totally what happened. The woman who died though. RIP for real... 🙏

A church guy being the third victim? Not surprised... 😅🙃

Maroni talking about Arkham!! I'm so excited!!

Obviously, Oswald listening in the background...

New name : Paolo. He's really trying, but he gets it wrong. x)

He's lying about being Italian on his mother's side, "the side that he claims", but the truth is that he actually does love his mother. Half lies. x)

Maroni just gave him money out of the blue?

The little talk about starting from nothing and making yourself by working hard etc... FORESHADOWING!! 😌

"Gotham is the city of opportunity." Hum... Shouldn't it be 'Gotham is the city of crimes'? x)

"Honestly sir, I didn't hear anything at all." "Atta boy." YES!! That's actually the ONLY way to react when you are asked if you heard ANYTHING! 😌

"Go take care of your mother, Paolo." That would be so sweet... but you know... x)

The walk! I like the fact that even when we just see his upper body, Oswald's actor actually always does the walk! I mean, that's part of the character so you HAVE to do it, but like, you notice it, you actually do notice it, and I love that about him! 🥰🐧

The guy actually hiding in the former juvi facility. Meh, can't be smart about everything. Gotta catch the guy 9 minutes before the end of the episode ya know. x)

Is it a TRAP!? Like for Harvey, or Gordon? 😮

Oops. Harvey's been caught.

Harvey pleading his case to the killer saying that he's thankful, that he's doing them a favor. Great defence. 🤣🤣

Oh my God... The killer's talk though... He's so right... Public figures almost never pay for their crimes... So he did justice himself... I feel that man...

Jim's conflicted because he knows that the man's right...

FUCK!! The whole man's speech!! This is the premise of Jim's morality path... Damn it!

NNNNNOOOO! Harvey cuffing the guy to the balloon was a fucked up move! Jim grabbing the man! Please I hoped he would, but damn he's flying in the air with him now. 😭😭

Jim didn't want to let go and begged (ordered?) Harvey to shoot the balloon instead! THANK GOD! Jim, you're doing so good there. I know you're gonna go somehow dark later, but for now... freaking thank you!

The landing on the top of the pickup must have hurt though. 😅

Falcone!!

OMG Natalia was Falcone's "girl"... �� That's the one Fish ordered to get into an "accident". 😭

Arkham again... Damn.

Btw, Fish's makeup. 🤌

Damn. Who's the guy's last target?

Bruce's "He killed people too. That made him a criminal." Okay, let me get this straight. I don't condone murder, but I get the idea that sometime you need to be a bad guy to do good. Imagine if killing that guy now would prevent a hundred innocent people to be killed. Killing is not something right to do, but in that context, you kill one to save the others, you know? What I mean is... It's a tough subject, but if killing one person saves a lot of others... And I mean one actual bad person against kind of good people... and I don't really mean "good people", just people who actually did not do terrible things, you know. I don't even know if I would be capable of doing something like that, but the self righteous belief that killing is bad in every context... I don't think it's true. Anyway.

Alfred with his APRON. 🫠 Make me dinner too. 🥰 Please. 🙄🥰

Alfred witty remarks. x)

Bruce is EATING, finally dude.

Jim, home, must be full of bruises, damn. The man struggles to sit down. He didn't break a bone because it's a tv show, hum. 🙄

Barbara concerned again. 🥲

Seeing Jim's face... It's like he's really been 'moved' by the balloon man's speech. It's like an electroshock. I feel like he's about to tell Barbara about Oswald. 🤔 (he did not, oops)

"I want you to know that you can tell me anything." BRO! She's giving you a chance to come clean. I mean, technically you are clean, but ya know.

"This city's sick. Sick in a way I hadn't realised." For real though. 🙃 Harvey told you in the first episode. 🙃

"Doesn't matter" That's the 'last target'? Disappointing, but I get it. That also genius 'cause basically the guy only had 4 balloons, but there's way more people that would 'need' to be cuffed to it...

Jim's speech on people, justice, the law... 👌

Barbara wants to believes him so bad! Girl's crying!

OOOOHHHH, the knock knock knocking... Tell me... I think I saw that... That's him right? HIM!?

OSWALD!! 🎉 In a SUIT!! I told YOU!! (Btw, did he buy a new suit with the money Maroni gave him ? Or did he take his suit to dry-cleaning to get rid of the blood stains? Just wondering 🤔) He wanted to look good for Jim. 🙄 Let me fantasize. x)

"Hello, James. *huffs* Old friend." AAAAHHHH!!

He's already calling him 'old friend'. 🙃🙃🙃🙃 I guess throwing you into the water, instead of shooting you, makes him somehow closer to a friend than an enemy, but... 🤣🤣😭😭 The AUDACITY!! x)

Jim's face. Oswald's smile. AH!

Jim had a freaking day... and it's not over. 😭

FUCKING HELL. MY GOD. I... AWESOME.

I don't even know what to say... Just... My brain's not working anymore...

[Okay, a tiny bit disappointed that we didn't see Edward this time, but I know there is going to be a lot of him in the future. So that makes up for it.]

1. Alfred did not say "bloody", not even once, in the whole damn episode!! 😮 I'm utterly disappointed!! 😔 But I still like him, of course. 🙄🥰

Late additions, two hours later, when my brain decides to function again :

Like, comment, loose your shit with me... It's your choice!!

2. Barbara will at least be relieved that her boyfriend is NOT a liar (not really yk) nor a murderer. Because here he is : Oswald Cobblepot, flesh and blood!! 😌

3. The fact that Barbara is BI, BI, BI! 🎶

Looking forward to the next episode!! 🫶

[thegreymoon]

Till the End of the Moon

Time to exercise my masochistic tendencies and see if this is the episode when I finally quit this disaster. The blatant unacknowledged rape in the last episode has brought me to the edge and I need only one firm push to abandon ship.

Before anyone accuses me of being a hypocrite, no, in-text rape has never stopped me from watching something before, and, yes, I have enjoyed plenty of non-con in my drama-watching/fic-reading career, but there are at least two reasons why it disgusted me here. 

It was NOT ACKNOWLEDGED for what it was. Instead, it was portrayed as  a) “romantic” and b) a girlboss power move where I was supposed to be cheering for Sang Jiu finding her ~agency~ and ~getting her due~, which would never have been allowed to fly without it being clear that it was a VIOLATION if the genders had been reversed. Imagine if a woman had asked for a divorce (regardless of whether her reasons were stupid or not), told her husband to leave their marital home, proceeded to get drunk in the privacy of her own bedroom, and he snuck in when she was incapacitated, drugged her some more and “took what was owed to him” while she couldn’t even speak to tell him no? I have been thoroughly spoiled for this drama and have seen gifs of this particular scene so many times and yet NOT ONCE have I seen people mention the rape or warn for it in any capacity! Which brings me to my second point.

I WAS EXPECTING FLUFF!! As much as appreciate non-con when I willingly seek it out, I do not appreciate being blindsided by it. Just no. 

***

He remains beautiful, though. As always.

***

Girl, just kill him.

Sometimes, divorce is just not enough. 

***

Nobody does the tears in his eyes as well as he does 😭

***

Aww, Ji Ze, noooooo 😢

***

I do love the Eye of Sauron 🔥🔥

Though I prefer when LYX is the one wielding it! 

***

Aww, Chu Huang, no 😭

There goes the only female character in this garbage heap that I actually liked. 

***

Oh, go fuck yourself. 

***

LMAO.

A traitor remains a traitor. Go fuck yourself some more. 

***

Is it. Is it really 🤔

***

LMAO. Of course not.

***

The Devil God has his face!!

Also, let’s not lie, the actor playing him until right this very moment was definitely not LYX 🤣🤣 I can tell  by the ears! 

***

THIRD ATTEMPT OVER MULTIPLE DAYS TO FINISH THIS DAMN EPISODE 😭😭

All of this dramas crimes not withstanding, the one I will not be able to forgive is the fact that this is so fucking boring. LYX and his gorgeous costumes are doing a lot of heavy lifting, but everything else is so nonsensical and bad, it just isn’t enough. 

***

LMAO, they cooked him 🤣🤣

***

The things I will watch for his face 😭😭

***

She’s supposed to be so cute, but I can’t stop thinking about how much of a creep she is. Such a waste of Bai Lu on this awful character. 

***

Chu Wanning will always have his face for me 😭😭

***

Because you are very beautiful 😊

***

Every time I decide that I am so done with this drama, he goes and does something like this and I am stuck for yet another episode 😭😭

The hyperfixation is real 😭😭

[fukuwatchesbl]

OFTS thoughts (- I don’t have a title)

Here, I’ll talk about the characters and their relationships. I’m not really trying to analyze them, it’s more about how I perceive them so far (as of episode 3).

First, let me get it out of my system, but I don’t think there’s a clear villain in this show, nor a mastermind. I think we’re supposed to take the characters (mostly) as they’re presented, with blatant flaws. If these characters are dishonest, it’s mainly with themselves or with each other, not with the audience.

1. The core friendship

From the start, Cheum, Boston, Ray and Mew’s friendship felt off to me, but in retrospect, more than off, it’s imperfect. While this can read as a euphemism after last Saturday, there are scenes with both working and broken bonds between them. The good: making sure everyone gets home, Boston and Ray's go-to person being Mew (in ep1: Boston gives his number to Nick for his phone repair, Ray calls him right after exiting Sand’s flat), Mew 2nd go-to person is Ray (but only after he met Top), the way they know who will not do the assignment and who is good with each part of the job. The bad: Boston throwing under the bus both Ray and Mew to get Top, the peer pressure to lose one's virginity, their teacher foreshadowing comments…

Honestly, if it wasn’t for Boston’s unhinged behaviour, their friendship might have a chance to last. (it still might)

2. But that’s not Boston.

Boston looks everyone down, and what he wants, he gets. He doesn’t mind twisting the truth (Top) or gaslighting people around (Nick). He’s also someone who sees everything through the lens of sex. His value is established by the number of partner he has, by how they want to come back for more, and how he had them first and can get them back whenever.

It looks like this lens might also impact his assumptions about others’ relationships. While we now know for a fact Mew and Ray kissed, I highly doubt they had sex. But, at this point, I feel Boston sincerely believe they did. Maybe he saw them getting together in a room. And what else could they have done together if not fuck? This is why Boston keeps looking at them with suspicion. He thinks they’re lying/hiding/hypocrites, but HE sees them, HE is no dupe.

3. Mew the virgin

I wouldn’t be surprised if Mew ended up being demisexual. But, let's talk about how so many of us see him as mastermind, and... I don't. Or, at least, not yet.

Did he make sure their school project would secure his future? Yes, I agree with this. It's his idea, and he's aware how much Ray cares for him, and, to some extant, he's profiting from it. Did he take top's 3-months-limit as a form of challenge? Probably (unless he's demi, then the scene take a slightly different tone). BUT, that's it. I strongly believe the rest can be taken at face value.

Well... until he'll decide to confront Top about cheating on him. Because, then we get to this (I think):

And I still don't know if that smile is Mew feeling reassured, knowing he has the upper hand in their relationship, or planning revenge.

4. Top, a much frailer top-tier

Not gonna lie, I love his character. He looks like a basic (wo)manizer at first, but he's showing some cracks that make me want to know more. Of all the characters, he is one of the most adjusted when comparing who he thinks he is and who he says he is. But that doesn't always mean he lets others see all parts of him.

He had zero problem sharing his childhood trauma with Mew or openly taking sleeping pills, but whatever that dude, Beam, is to him is out of line. And Beam stating he knows Top both in and out of bed? What do you mean OUT?

Also, that clip of his confrontation with Mew (see above), shows Top crying. Do I think Top and Mew are opposites? Maybe. I mean: Mew is reserved, sexless, composed, while Top is in-the-open (mostly), sexfull, emotive. And gosh are we going to see emotions from Top next week. His carefully worked façade is falling in favor of anger and jealousy. Mostly (and wrongly) directed at Sand.

5. Sand, the only really adjusted person?

Well, adjusted only if you consider the men, because so far the women are rocking it better than everybody else. But he has his shit together at least. No trauma in view, very done with bullshit in general, discreet where needed (did you sleep with Boston??), know his own value...

Honestly, the only mystery is what happened between him and Top. Like some others, I feel there must be another person in between them. My wild theory is it's Cheum's lil bro 🤡🤡🤡

6. Atom, who the fuck are you?

Atom, played by Title Kirati, is Cheum little brother. He just got introduced in the last episode, but I have no idea how he connects to the rest of the story (thus my wild theory). We know he's a comm arts student (a link to Nick?). The reason I think he'll impact, in some way, the story is his presence in the opening credits and 1 micro-second in the trailer.

7. Nick, stalker with gentle heart

To be fair, Nick is not the only character with stalker behaviour. Boston shows it with his habit of taking pictures of his lovers in intimate moments, and the picture of Ray/Mew's kiss. Ray also who follows Sand, and Mew who admits he could very much go pry in his lover's phone given the chance.

But Nick is not the poor bunny we thought he is. His stalker behaviour is present from the start with the invasion of privacy on Boston's phone, which would be illegal in many countries, and now the taping of Boston's car (illegal too). But there's also the cameras he suggests to Boston for their pool party. No one was asking for video and sound recording, but he suggested it as if it was perfectly normal. (btw, did Drake use this kind of camera? Could we get both revenge porn and/or commercial sex tapes?)

8. Ray, he'll break some heart, his or yours, or both

So, where do I start here. By the obvious? Falling out of love is complicated, it’s a process partly built on bad habits. Sometimes, you might even start falling in love again before being fully done with said process. I think this is happening to Ray. But I also think Ray has been lying to others for so long to hide the true extent of his pain, that he has difficulties acknowledging the burgeoning feelings he has for Sand. There’s a reason why both Mew and Yo perceive them better than he does.

There are other things to mention about him. The drinking issue, the call to mental health lack of care, his blackouts habit. And that one is really an habit that has found him waking up in random people beds with no memory of what happened in the night. He didn't go presuming he and Sand had sex that very first night out of nowhere. I'm not gonna lie, it scares me that this can be someone's real life experience. It brings back that time when a coworker told me that really I should have a blackout once (on purpose): "it's a great experience". "Great" said with no sarcasm nor joking tone. It still gives me the chill.

Anyway, I'll stop here, sadly I have not much to say about the women in the series. I wish they were more present, and as messy as their male counterparts, but that doesn't look like it'll be the case. The writers and directors are focusing specifically on mlm experiences, something as intimate to them as to the main characters.

[infinitelytheheartexpands]

acts one and two:

-i love ballroom dancing in a play

-this dude just completely ruined the vibe by screaming in the middle of the ballroom dancing way to go dude

-angelo is a suck up

-giving someone unchecked power is always good :/

-wait is angelo the random scarpia ultimatum guy

-HE IS

-i love me some audience interaction

-“well, what has he done?” “a woman” LMAOOOOOOOOOO

-medical humor?

-oh no not another claudio

-literally what? this dude is getting arrested just bc he got some girl pregnant? that’s not how that works

-stop sex-shaming them oh my god

-i want all of their outfits

-okay so they were literally engaged come on angelo

-so angelo was like “i’m gonna be petty and dig up this law literally no one cared about”

-so the duke didn’t leave at all but he’s like “idk if i fucked up by allowing this law about extramarital sex to go unenforced but i don’t want anyone to get mad at me for enforcing it again so i’m having angelo do it and i’m gonna see how it goes” i guess??? i could be misunderstanding???

-and here’s where we get the monk disguise

-well that’s one way to walk into a convent lucio

-well that was blunt

-isabella cool

-“‘tis one thing to be tempted, another thing to fall.” that may be true but angelo you need to stop being so judgmental

-at least he’s not a hypocrite i guess?

-elbow lol

-this is just like that one scene with dogberry in act 4 of much ado

-also: it’s interesting to me that escalus is played as a woman

-this scene is so funny for no reason

-angelo said “this is boring i’m out” lmao

-why is this accent the same as the one from the “life it never die” meme

-okay this might just be one of the funniest shakespeare scenes i’ve ever seen

-go off provost!

-dispose of juliet? that girl is litchrally pregnant angelo

-“let it be his fault [condemned] and not the brother.” “and neither heaven nor man grieve at the mercy.” okay pop off isabella

-“i would to heaven i had your potency, and you were isabel.” yeah because he’s a dick

-YES YES ISABELLA

-lucio is just rooting on isabella now and i support him

-stringing together some pieces of this for a contrasting monologue from act 3 miranda? 👀

-“i’ll bribe you?” “with what?” “…with prayers” lol that’s not bribery isabella

-angelo is horny uh oh

-dude it’s literally not her fault that you’re horny

-i mean it’s not a crime to be horny but she did not cause you to be horny

-angelo’s having a breakdown

-“never could the strumpet with all her double vigor, art and nature, once stir my temper, but this virtuous maid subdues me quite.” ewwwwwwwwwww

-the classic “no one can recognize me in different clothes” thing i so love

-“so then it seems your most offenseful act was mutually committed?” “mutually.” “then was your sin of heavier kind than his.” okay that is just BLATANT misogyny. like literally they both consented and yet by some magic the woman is “more sinful”. the math isn’t mathing there duke!

-i just wanna give juliet a huge hug

-oh this guy is having catholic guilt BAD

-SCARPIA ULTIMATUM TIME

-isabella is just confused

-oh she realized

-there are no good options so while part of me disagrees with her reasoning, i get it. also: consent is important people

-YEAH ISABELLA YOU BACK HIM INTO A CORNER

-“who will believe thee, isabel?” can someone pls let me go punch angelo in the face on behalf of all of us who have been told this

-GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF OF HER

-my heart is absolutely breaking for isabella and i think i need to go lie down now

so partly bc i have a day off and partly bc it looks like i need to go back to square one in terms of picking a second audition monologue, today is looking like a play-watching day

first up is measure for measure (specifically rsc 2019).

what i know about this play:

-this girl named isabella is about to become a nun and she’s cool

-random politics guy decides he wants to tap that and basically gives her the scarpia ultimatum

-people are horny (obviously)

-someone gets disguised as a monk

-i think this is one of the bed trick plays????????? (ugh)

anyway stay tuned for updates i guess

[beevean]

I am sooo sick of hearing the "It's for kids!" excuse. I get that children aren't going to notice or care about minor animation/art errors, overthink the complexities of politics or real life issues, or loose sleep over every single plot thread not being tied up or every corner of lore being explored. But it's not an excuse to make your characters look like complete idiots, or not try to tackle more mature subjects with some class. I don't want to hear it when fucking Big Bird learned about death all the way back in the early 80s. Metal Sonic and Eggman are repeat offenders who WILL come back to start shit, and Sonic just letting them go without even keeping an eye on them makes him look really fucking stupid. And that's not getting into the creepy implications of Sonic wanting Eggman to stay as Mr. Tinker.

It's antiquated, because by 2022, we had plenty of cartoons aimed at kids that dared to tackle complex issues. Why did Friendship of Magic gain such a massive fanbase and pretty much revolutionized cartoons after the late 2000s slump? You think they were all horny for the horsies? Or maybe it's because Lauren Faust fought against the idea that things aimed at children or girls didn't deserve as much effort as other media?

It's ageist, because you're implying that children are too stupid to understand anything more complex than black and white morality.

It's insulting towards your critics, obviously, but also towards your fans - whether you mean it or not, you're implying that they're also stupid for caring so much about something aimed at children. And if you're not, if they get to praise the "depth" of your writing, then you're a damn hypocrite.

It's insulting towards the games, the series you're now working for, sneering at them for being "simple" and for not growing together with its audience (nevermind that the Sonic series has wide appeal and it's not strictly for kids).

It's insulting towards yourself, because really? You are more willing to admit that you're writing a stupid story rather than conceding a point? How fucking petty do you want to be?

It's cowardly, because nobody asked you to insert Mr. Tinker's subplot, or turn Sonic into a priest, or create Surge. Since Mr. Tinker was introduced, you communicated that you wanted to write a deeper story. Don't you dare backpedal from that.

It's a blatant lie, because I've read IDW since Issue #1, and I did not dream the horror show that was the Metal Virus arc, and I did not dream Surge and Kit whose backstories are rooted in realistic, nauseating abuse. That's what you consider a "children's fantasy"?

All of this because Flynn couldn't consider the idea that people had problems with his writing. Much like he seems to think that the only people who aren't happy with Starline's anticlimatic death are stans who wanted him to have a happy ending. He had to make a complete fool of himself and insult everyone involved with his stupid comic (heh, I get to call it that and know it's Word of God <3), because he's a mediocre writer who only had the biggest, most unfair stroke of luck in existence to get to the place he's in now, and he's not used to people not getting in line to prostrate at his feet.

This asshole brushes off Sonic and yet is working on the next big game.

I hope he gets burned out as soon as he's done with Frontiers. Or better yet, that he does something so indefensible that his fans will start to treat him like they treated Pontaff.

[destinygoldenstar]

Dhar Mann's Karate Kid Rip Off

Three videos in a row, guys. 

I think Dhar Mann’s trying to make me do more posts because of the videos I (mostly) tackle. His titles are showing school topics far more often, even if the actual video has NOTHING to do with school at all. (Or, maybe it’s just because school is starting up for the kiddos again, despite it being July, and Dhar Dhar’s gotta cash in on teaching kids the Dos and Don’ts of the school system)

(Btw if there’s any video you want me to cover, let me know, and I’ll check to see if there’s enough immoral stuff that I can cover in a post)

So apparently, if you hack into your grades at school:

The punishment is that you have to upgrade thousands of computers, go broke, become your principal’s slave, and get robbed by your bullies, who will get no consequences.

But if you attempt to poison someone to ruin your parent’s love life:

Zero punishment. If anything, you get rewarded with a new sibling that’s your friend.

I’m sorry, but for me, trying to RUIN SOMEONE’S LIFE deserves punishment. I know I said that ‘parents should listen to their kid and take to consideration how they feel, and reassure them that their feelings matter and that they’ll help them’ So what the hell should I complain about?

I never said ‘don’t punish your kid ever.’ In situations like THAT, you need to put your foot down, no matter who’s doing it. 

I said ‘punish your kid wisely, in a way that’ll help them learn their mistake.’ That’s a completely different thing than not giving your kid any consequence at all.

I don’t disregard consequences, or say they should. I say that Dhar Mann handles consequences extremely poorly. 

Now, I ignored a video a while back about kids BREAKING INTO A BUILDING to put up a thank you poster for a teacher. And the illegal act goes completely unpunished because it was a thank you poster. The lesson there was that the teacher was a hypocrite who immediately judged kids by their ability to answer questions and get As, and deemed genuinely good kids as lazy and uninspired when they clearly are. 

I know teachers exactly like that, so I appreciated ENOUGH that the behavior was called out. Even if the kids should have at least gotten a small consequence for BREAKING INTO A BUILDING. So that’s why I didn’t cover it.

You see, Dhar Mann, despite the bad messages in the videos he makes, can SOMETIMES, bring up a decent enough point that I can let it slide. Does this happen occasionally or half the time? No, of course not. But hey, Dhar Mann can SOMETIMES make some valid points, even if they’re underneath some terrible writing. 

So, why not just RIP OFF a famous movie that has a GOOD MESSAGE? That should shut me up!

And the recent video (inspired by Karate Kid by the way, a movie that Dhar Mann is CLEARLY trying to copy the magic of, with no understanding on how that movie worked) has a karate teacher bailing on his students because they’ve been failures at everything, even insulting children for their poor efforts. (Again, I know teachers like this in real life) 

But the students decide to fight against the bullies in a karate tournament because OF COURSE the opposing team is a bunch of bullies! 

(Anyone else thought the bully was gonna kick down and break the trophy shelf on first watch?)

Yeah, this video is BLATANT COPYING of the movie.

There’s a different between inspiration, and blatantly ripping off.

“I mean, the dude thinks he’s Mr. Miyagi or something.”

“We don’t need a Star Wars/Karate Kid wannabe trying to-” -Yes, this is a REAL LINE from the video

The sensei’s name is “Mr MIYODA” COME ON

In case you couldn’t tell, YES, I have seen Karate Kid. I totally love watching a rip off video poorly copying it when I could just watch the movie instead. (The ‘fights’ aren’t even fights, they’re just tapping and crashing in unrealistic fashion as to how beat up people usually fall.) (Fun fact: Punched people don’t roll over when crashing from a hit)

So yeah, the entire video’s title IS A LIE

“Rival Gangs Face Off In School”

A Karate class is not a gang.

School has NOTHING to do with the video.

Okay look, I DO NOT MIND if something is similar to another something, IF it can stand on it’s own two feet. Obviously I’d point out the similarities, but that’s not enough for me to say that it’s a rip off. Heck, I get inspired by a lot of stuff for my writing, and follow other stuff closely to rework in my own writing. It’s not a bad thing, as some wise people in my life have taught me. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.

It’s like the second and third Danganronpa games. Their chapters are VERY similar to each other in a lot of areas, but they aren’t rip offs of each other. These games have widely different themes and tones to each other that makes them feel like their own thing. The second game is about crafting a future and focuses more on character interaction and depth, while the third game is a brutal truth bomb of a fever dream (not sorry). 

BUT there’s a LINE with that. 

If you blatantly use a character’s name from another property but change the words around, that’s ripping off.

If you follow the exact plot points of another property, from beginning to end, that’s ripping off.

If you have the exact same themes of another property with little to no distinguish, that’s ripping off.

This is NOT ‘inspired’ by Karate Kid Dhar Mann. This is a RIP OFF of Karate Kid. And in that sense, why wouldn’t I just watch Karate Kid if I want to see this story, but told in s better, more compelling way?

[oriigami]

we slept on the ocean last night

(My gift for @cozza for the @setsailexchange! Strawhat feel-good fluff, feat. nightmares, love, and platonic intimacy. Also on ao3 here!)

It starts like this: Luffy can’t sleep alone. 

Zoro discovers this about six hours after they set out to sea from Shells Town, just the two of them in Luffy’s little dinghy and no destination to speak of. The sun has sunk past the horizon, and the water all around their tiny boat is pitch black, scattered with the shimmering reflections of stars. 

Luffy yawns, stretching his jaw open wider than a human’s should rightly be able to go (and maybe the rubber thing still freaks Zoro out just a little bit, okay, he’s working on it) and then, without a word of warning, crawls over to where Zoro’s sitting and drops bonelessly into his lap, sprawling against his chest with his head pillowed over Zoro’s heart. 

Zoro goes tense immediately, only barely resisting the instinct to shove him away immediately; in a boat this size, that would definitely send Luffy over the edge, and his new dumbshit captain can’t swim. “What. Are you doing.” 

Luffy yawns again, and snuggles closer. “Mm. Sleepin’.”

“Okay,” Zoro says, with what he decides is a truly admirable degree of forced calm. “Why on me.” 

“Comfy,” Luffy mumbles into his shirt. “‘nd warm.”

“Well, get off,” Zoro says, and then, when there’s absolutely no response, “Luffy? Hey-” 

He looks down at Luffy’s face, already slack with sleep and dead to the world, and the rest of the sentence dissolves into a sigh. “...Nevermind.” 

Because- see, Zoro’s not a touchy kind of person. It’s probably been more than a year since he was last hugged, and even that was just because Johnny tended to get kind of over-affectionate when he was drunk. Sometimes he shakes hands when handing over a captured pirate for the bounty, and that’s about it. And that’s fine. 

Luffy’s whole weight is on top of him, warm and heavy and snoring softly against his chest, and Zoro’s pretty sure he can’t even remember the last time he was in this much contact with another person for this long. Luffy’s hair is unwashed and salt-encrusted, and it tickles his chin.

But. Well. It’s not bad. It’s definitely weird, and something about it makes Zoro feel oddly warm, but it’s not bad. So he just sighs again, and leans back to look up at the stars, and absently reaches up to rest an arm around Luffy’s shoulders. 

He falls asleep a lot faster than usual, that night.

-

It goes like this: Nami has nightmares. 

She’s good at hiding them. Her sobs are nearly silent, muffled into her pillow and rendered all but inaudible by the doors between her room and the boys’. But Usopp is nothing if not observant- and besides, he doesn’t sleep all that well either. When he closes his eyes he’ll see his mother’s face, too still and too pale with a cloth draped over her kind, sightless eyes. More recently, there have been fresher terrors filling up the inside of his head when he tries to sleep; chief among them Kaya, carved to pieces by Kuro’s claws. 

The point is this- when Nami slips out of her room in the middle of the night, her breaths uneven and stuttery from crying, and pads almost soundlessly up to the deck on unsteady feet, Usopp is already awake. He lies still for a minute or two, worrying his lower lip and deliberating on whether to follow her. It’s obvious she’s trying to keep to herself. If it’s something secret, he doesn’t want to bother her. It’s not like he knows that much about her, or about any of them, really.

But at the same time- they’re crew now, right? Even if they’re only been sailing together for a few days. And crew look after each other. Usopp might not have much experience with being a pirate yet, but he has spent years crying into his pillow, so that makes him qualified to deal with this, maybe. He cautiously maneuvers his way out from under Luffy’s arm and tiptoes to the door, careful not to wake his other two crewmates up. 

He finds her at the bow, sitting with her back against the railing and her head resting on her knees, shoulders shaking. She startles a little when he steps up onto the deck, jerking her head up and glaring over at him, but her shoulders slump again after a moment. 

After another moment of indecision, he sits down next to her. He’s never been good at staying quiet- his mouth has a tendency to open up on its own whenever he’s nervous- but he manages it this time, and just sits there with his arm pressed against hers as she cries.

Once she’s worked herself down to what seems like relative calm again, he offers, “Do you, um. Wanna… talk about it?” 

“No,” she says immediately, and then, quieter, “I… no. It’s fine. There’s nothing to talk about.” 

It’s one of the most blatant lies he’s ever heard, and he’s been responsible for some real whoppers, but he’d be a hypocrite to point it out. Instead, he says, “Okay, um… do you wanna hear about the time a giant eagle carried me away to its nest, and I had to climb all the way down a tree that was so tall it touched the clouds?” 

Nami chokes on a laugh, and it’s an ugly, wet sound, half a sob, but she leans her head against his shoulder, all the remaining tension running out of her body. “Y’know what? Sure. Tell me.” 

Usopp’s just reached the part of the story where he finds a whole village of people living in the tree’s roots when he realizes she’s fallen asleep, and he trails off. The ends of her short orange hair poke at his skin, and her cheek is pillowed against his shoulder. 

He guesses he’s not moving for the rest of the night, so he carefully wraps an arm around her narrow shoulders and lets his head tip against hers, and closes his eyes. 

For once, he doesn’t have any nightmares.

-

It goes like this: Sanji doesn’t sleep.

“Oi, dumbass,” Zoro says, leaning against the kitchen doorframe and folding his arms across his chest. “Why are you still awake?” 

It’s well into the dead silent hours of night, and even varying as bedtime tends to be on the Going Merry, everyone else is already long since asleep, aside from Usopp, on the lookout in the crow’s nest. It had been a long and tiring day, and most of them had hit the sack immediately after dinner- except for Sanji, who’s still mindlessly moving around the kitchen, like he’s killing time until daybreak. 

It’s a measure of how exhausted Sanji must be that he barely even bristles at the insult, only blinks a little and glances over at Zoro. Even with his stupid bangs hiding his face, the sleeplessness is still plain to see in his visible eye. “Hm?” He blinks again, then says, “Oh. It’s you.” 

“Why are you still awake?” Zoro asks again, because he still hasn’t got an answer.

“Couldn’t sleep,” Sanji says, and it’s not a lie, but it’s not the whole truth, either. “So I came up here to…” he trails off, makes a vague gesture at the pot bubbling on the stove. “It’s fine. I’m not even tired. I’m used to waking up early, for the breakfast crowd, so.”

There’s a lot of retorts hovering on Zoro’s tongue, but he bites them all back and just says, “Fuck that,” and reaches out and grabs Sanji by the wrist and drags him out of the kitchen without a backwards glance.  

“Jackass, what are you- let go of me- what the fuck, I said I’m fine- at least let me turn off the stove-” (Zoro does grant that one. Wouldn’t do for the kitchen to burn down.)

He’s probably lucky Sanji is so out of it, he muses as he hauls the cook belowdecks to the sleeping quarters- if not, he probably would have taken at least one bone-shattering kick to the skull by now. But then again, if Sanji wasn’t dead on his feet (and wasn’t a fucking idiot), Zoro wouldn’t be having to do this in the first place. They’ve just entered the most dangerous sea in the world. They need to get their sleep when they can get it so they’ll be ready for trouble when it comes.  

As usual, the shared bedroom is piled with pillows and slightly ragged blankets, transforming it into a comfortable little nest. Luffy is sleeping half-propped up against one of the walls, Nami napping with her head on his lap, and Sanji’s cursing goes quiet so as to not wake her up as soon as Zoro tows him inside, which Zoro is grateful for. It was starting to get kind of repetitive. 

He drops Sanji down directly next to Luffy, half on top of him, and nods to himself when a rubber arm almost immediately tightens around the cook’s chest, gently but firmly trapping him in place, and the captain snuggles up against Sanji’s side in his sleep. 

Sanji glares up at him and hisses, “I hate you,” or tries to, but he interrupts himself in the middle of the sentence with a yawn, which diminishes the impact considerably. 

“Yeah, yeah.” Zoro rolls his eyes and then drops down on Sanji’s other side, letting his head flop onto Sanji’s shoulder and letting his eyes slide shut. “Just go to sleep.”

-

It goes like this: Robin doesn’t touch people. 

It takes a couple days for Chopper to notice, because she does tickle his sides and ruffle his ears, but… she only ever does that with the false hands she creates with her devil fruit, the ones that dissolve into cherry blossoms that tickle his nose. She keeps her real hands close, only touches out of necessity, never when she doesn’t need to, and even then it’s always fleeting. 

And she sleeps apart from everyone else, too. 

Theoretically, Chopper knows, there’s a boys’ room and a girls’ room. In practice, though, there’s really one room for everybody, and another room where Robin sleeps and Nami changes and keeps her things. 

(He asks Zoro, one of the first nights, why Nami often doesn’t sleep in the girls’ room, why the crew instead sleeps all piled up and tangled together when he hasn’t ever heard of humans doing that before. Zoro just shrugs in response. “It’s a comfort,” he says simply. “Won’t air out secrets that aren’t mine, but people don’t become pirates just for fun. Most of us have trouble sleeping.”)

Chopper finds Zoro is right. He likes sleeping together with the others. It’s just easier, when he’s got Luffy’s fingers tangled in his fur and Usopp’s head pillowed on his side, to stop the Doctor’s last words from echoing in his head. 

(Luffy also declares him the second-best pillow on the crew, after only Zoro, which absolutely doesn’t make him happy at all.)

It happens just after Skypiea, when they’re all still just beginning to recover, sheltered in the sky while they heal from the battle against the mad god. Robin easily concedes when Chopper asks her to come to the sickbay so he can check for lasting damage from the lightning bolt, and lies down on the cot to let him check her ears, her eyes, her heartbeat. 

He’s finished his checkup (no apparent lasting problems, miraculously) and is noting down her baselines in his notebook for future reference when he glances up and realizes she’s slipped into slumber, her eyes closed and her breaths slow. It’s not a surprise; they’re all exhausted. 

But… maybe it’s because Chopper still doesn’t have that much real experience with humans, but he can’t help but think the way Robin is sleeping doesn’t look all that restful. She’s kind of curled up, her arms folded up against her chest, fingers digging into her forearms tight enough to bruise. 

Zoro’s voice rings in his ears. It’s a comfort. People don’t become pirates just for fun.

He slips down from his stool and shifts into his full reindeer form, and carefully climbs up onto the narrow cot beside her, folding his legs up underneath him and letting his side press against her back. He can feel the miniscule trembles running through her body, tight with tension. 

He rests his head on the pillow next to hers and closes his eyes, and slowly, slowly, she stills, relaxing into his side, her tremors calming little by little. 

He thinks he hears her murmur something that might be, “Thank you, Doctor-san,” just before he drifts off to sleep, too. 

-

It goes like this: It’s a comfort.

They’re all hurting after Enies Lobby, all aching and grieving and above all tired, a bone-deep weariness borne of running and fighting and crying and nearly dying over and over again. They can barely stay on their feet for the boat ride back to Water Seven. Robin can’t seem to stop smiling, even through the painful abrasions around her wrists and the tear tracks drying on her cheeks and the ache that digs down to her bones. 

Iceberg gives them a whole suite of rooms to use in Galley-La’s temporary headquarters, all comfortable, all with their own big soft beds to sleep in. He means well, she’s certain, but he just doesn’t know how the Strawhat Pirates do things. But, then, there’s nobody else who does things quite like them.

Iceberg is barely out the door before Robin is folding her arms across her chest, ferrying mattresses and bedding and pillows and comforters into the main lounge, gathering them into a piled-up nest of comfort. The shared bedroom on the Going Merry had been outfitted much the same, she remembers, and the warmth of familiarity is the least she can offer them after all they’ve given her. 

(Later, Franky will see this, and make a bed big enough to hold all of them, soft and comfortable and warm; but for now, they’re all safe and all alive, and so pillows on the floor are plenty.)

They don’t lie down so much as they all fall together at once in a tangle of limbs and pillows, now that the adrenaline has long since faded away, leaving only exhaustion in its wake. Robin finds herself with her head on Nami’s chest and one of Luffy’s arms slung across her shoulders, and Chopper cuddled against her stomach. 

It shouldn’t be as easy as it is to melt into the embrace, to let go of the constant vigilant caution that’s kept her alive for so long, but she trusts these people, like she’s never trusted anyone in her life. She was ready to die for them, and they responded by telling her to live for them instead, and remembering that fills her heart with such soft fondness it nearly hurts. 

But they’re not quite all together. Not yet.

She shifts to cross her arms again, careful not to disturb any of the crewmates already fast asleep around and on top of her, and lets an arm blossom from a doorframe in the hall outside to catch Usopp by the collar before he can slip away. She hears his yelp of surprise from just outside the door, quickly muffled, and smiles to herself. 

A moment later, he peers inside, hiding behind the mostly-closed door. She meets his eyes and smiles with all the gratitude she can’t begin to put into words, and nods towards an unused mattress and pillow at her side. He hesitates for a moment, clearly uncertain, caught between anxiety and hope, so she takes his hand in a succession of hers and tugs him over. He stumbles, but doesn’t resist, and she can see the exhaustion in him when he practically topples over onto the mattress. 

Within minutes, he’s asleep too, face buried in the pillow, snoring softly, one warm hand still clasped in Robin’s. She knows he still has things to work out with Luffy, with the rest of the crew, and there’ll be time for that later. Right now, though, they’re alive, and she’s free, and it’s time to rest. 

She falls asleep smiling for the first time in years. 

-

It goes like this: Luffy can’t sleep alone. 

So Rusukaina is… it’s hard. He’s not alone, Rayleigh’s there, and sometimes Hancock and the others visit and let him hug them as long as he wants, and that’s nice, but it’s not the same, not really. He misses his crew, misses Zoro’s solid warmth and the fluffy cushion of Usopp’s hair and the fleecy softness of Chopper’s fur and Robin’s low, rhythmic breathing. 

(He’s never slept better than when he was seven, piled together with Ace and Sabo and some ratty stolen blankets on the rough-hewn floor of their treehouse, with the crickets singing outside and the stars shining bright through the window.)

(But now there’s no Ace and Sabo, not ever again, and no crew to keep him warm and chase away the nightmares in their absence, and so he doesn’t sleep well.) 

He fights through it, because that’s what he always does, what he’s always done- press through. He has to get stronger for the people he has left. 

Going back to the Sunny is nothing less than going home. 

When night comes, they’re deep underwater, en route to Fishman Island, the sunlit waters of the surface long since gone. Past the railings of the Sunny, the world is nearly pitch black, lit only by the occasional bioluminescent creature wriggling past.

Luffy couldn’t care less, because right here and right now, the Sunny is the world, and nothing past their bubble of light and warmth and safety matters at all. He grins, and throws his arms out to drag his whole crew together into a messy pile in the middle of the deck- Sanji swears and Chopper shrieks and so does Nami, but not one of them tries to dodge- before flopping into the midst of the chaos himself. 

He winds up sprawled half on Brook and half on Sanji, who complains but doesn’t kick him off, his head on Robin’s thigh and his arms tangled through all of them, holding on tight to every member of his crew, the most important treasures in the world, the touch promising him they’re there, really there. 

He’s not letting go of any of them, not again, not ever. 

He’s reaching the crown with all of them or not at all. 

Someone runs a hand through his hair, and it feels nice. Someone says, “Get some sleep, captain. We’ll be here when you wake up.” 

He knows they will be.

[onlyhereforangst]

WWR

The Talk™️

lololol just kidding sorry Laura I love you here’s the real thing just in time 😘😘

We start with Ellie being veeeeery sus 👀 checking out Eastern Europe and the various countries, I mean yes there are plenty of nice, beautiful places there but this is a procedural aka obviously that area can only be shady. I also love that Nick came up silently and waited, watched what she was doing very intently, before announcing his presence. Almost like he’s been suspecting something is up with her for a little while now and seized on this perfect opportunity to do a little digging. But at the same time he doesn’t let it go on too long, and he almost gives her an out- he doesn’t accuse her of being shady AF, instead he’s like oh clearly she’s planning a trip because she’s always talked about loving Eastern Europe not the Bahamas like we’d just gotten jealous over a year ago…right, Ellie? A trip? And then her response ooo girl. She starts to get uber defensive and then realizes that oh wait, he handed me an out on a silver platter so yeah let me take it real quick. AND HE DOESN’T CALL HER ON IT. That’s the real good stuff in this scene- he’s a trained federal agent with years of undercover work, he can tell when someone is outright lying *especially* when that someone is Ellie. So he takes her defensive hesitation and than blatant lie and rolls with it. Beeeecause he trusts her. He trusts her to tell him when she’s ready. He saw how hurt she got when he kept bothering her after the kidnapping, and also saw her tell him once she was ready to. So yeah, he gets it now. He may be seriously concerned for her underneath that joking exterior, but he trusts her to tell him when the time is right, and also likely feels she wouldn’t keep anything huge huge from him. *cue getting ready for heartbreak in the finale it’s fine everything is fine*

Of course we move on to the flirty stuff because we avoid serious talk here 🙄 Ellie still sus though don’t get it wrong, shutting that laptop real quick when he rounds the corner taking no further chances. And her crossing her arms while he offends her choice of “vacation” hahaha she’s so obvious, honey you got the hots for him it’s ok. Little middle school flirting like oh yeah you can do better? Prove it jerk. And Niiiiiick 🥵 I wish you could see the screenshot I’m paused on right now after he says it depends on who he’s going with before he asks her who she’s going with because DAMN that look. He can think of one (1) person and one person only who he’d go on a trip with. Her little smirk back before she decides to throw all pretense to the wayside and says fuck it I don’t care that we’re in the bullpen out in the open lemme flirt with you ~*Agent Torres*~ AND HE’S LIKE TWO CAN PLAY AGENT BISHOP PLEASE INVITE ME ON YOUR TRIP THAT I KNOW DOESN’T EXIST BUT I’D LIKE TO KNOW I’D BE INVITED IF IT DID. And please her giddy smile afterwards and then she goes from leaning back in her chair to leaning forward towards him because these two are absolutely drawn to each other bitches and I can’t get enough of them and their little playful smiles and body language. AND NEITHER CAN JIMMY. 

Jimmy is the ellick fandom. Because yes, keep going this is ✨just delightful✨ and I never want it to stop unless you’re kissing. Thank you. And pleeeeease them stumbling over their words when they realized they’ve been caught I CANT. They both look *so* uncomfortable and it’s hilarious, and then Ellie can’t help but laugh at Nick’s dumb joke making fun of Jimmy because it’s her man and he’s so *funny*. 

Bring us to Jimmy redeeming himself. But also yes this just confirms to me that he told Nick what he needed to hear back when he said zero chemistry. And now Jimmy’s observed silently, see where Nick has come in the last year and everything the two have been through and knows he ready to hear it for real. Well Jimmy was ready a while ago for them to move it along so yeah he’s like where’s my spoon I’m gonna STIR THIS POT. And then it is born, the slogan of the episode, the point of the WWR (please don’t have PTSD Laura), The Talk™️. Nick’s face oooo man, he initially tries to deflect like no we aren’t talking about that cozy scene nuh uh and then it turns into his worst nightmare- being called out by James Palmer of all people with Ellie literally five feet away. (ALSO MCGEE IS LITERALLY A FOOT BEHIND THEM. He 1000% heard this entire conversation if Ellie heard it. Bro better not try to deny a single thing later I’m watching you sir 👀) Nick’s expression is screaming what the fuck shut UP Jimmy this can’t possibly be happening so let me try to joke and deflect again (small smile because it was still a little funny) and then back to what the fuck he’s undeterred shit shit shit oh thank god McGee has started talking yes we have a goddamn huge problem autopsy gremlin won’t take the damn hint. 

And woooooow the first time I’ve seen Nick at his desk in a while 👀👀 he said shit people are on to me let me put ✨space✨ in between us for like five seconds while we still shoot each other cute smiles. 

Oooooooh now we here for the evisceration. The Here Lies James Palmer moment of the episode. Catch me dYING in the club, not crying. Because holy shit Ellie this was not only brutal and Brian absolutely killed it during this scene with his reactions to Ellie ripping him apart. His “oh…Oh…oooh.” Had me cackling. And Ellie you are the poster child of defensive, pulling out all the stops. Let me deny everything, let me then be a slight hypocrite because people shouldn’t be talking about me (because I’m terrified about considering broaching that topic too) but I can talk about Gibbs and Sloane previously, and then also like sort of admitting to it by asking Jimmy what people think is going on because that’s the question she would *love* to know the answer to but hasn’t gotten yet. All the while cue me laughing hysterically at jimmy, top tier scene right here lets be honest. Because then Kasie comes in and it’s just perfect 🤣🤣🤣 this was his sister, Painful. Couldn’t have said it better myself Kasie 😭💀

Lol at McGee telling Ellie not to tell Nick he was right about it being a coincidence 😂

HOW CLOSE DO WE NEED TO STAND TOGETHER Y’ALL. HOW CLOSE. THERE’S A WHOLE GODDAMN BULLPEN. Remember when I said Nick wanted space for 5 whole seconds, yeah this is why. They’re straight magnets - drawn together indubitably 👀

Quick detour for the continued storyline of sus!Ellie and it makes me even more and more excited for the finaleeeeee. Because honey why do you know it takes 10 pounds of pressure to rip a trachea out and yes we all know it’s Odette and I can’t wait for the aaaaaangst. Also Kasie always coming in clutch with the humor, I live for it. “No you right I got nothing” 🤣🤣

Once again, Nick forgot about his desk, it was short-lived wasn’t it? 😅 

Now to another fun scene, and I feel like there’s a little double meaning to when Nick talks to Ellie about Phineas going through a lot this year, “more than most of us, which is saying a lot this year” - obviously covid but also maybe a callback to the kidnapping/jail cell stuff they dealt with?? Maybe?? Anyways, them being so awkward cute together because there’s a slight lull in the case so they revert back to their middle school selves, “so” “so…” I can’t with them omg. And then, and THEN of the two to bring it up, it’s Nick!!!! Yes!!! The GROWTH. This man used to be so emotionally closed off and now he, HE is bringing up The Talk™️ and he almost chickens out, he almost says haha you’re right we don’t have to have The Talk™️ after Ellie has a minor freakout because good god this girl is on *edge*. Her mind has probably been going a mile a minute the second she heard Jimmy call them out at the crime scene because she’s been living in blissful ignorance the past months/year whatever and now everything is smacking her in the face. But Nick, ugh I love the growth. He brushes it off and then has a moment where his face is like, no, no I’m not a wuss and he admits that yes he’s thought about it (the way he pauses when he says “not that it hasn’t been on my mind…us…” and I’m like yeah you two as a couple has been on your mind hasn’t it Nick 👀) and yes I want to have The Talk™️ with you Ellie Bishop. And not only does he admit this he’s also the one that’s like ok yeah cool BUT WHEN. Let’s nail this down please, I need it in my planner asap. And then she gets all giggly again “I don’t know when do *you* think?” Like omg I’m literally in middle school again. They’re so fucking cute and awkward it’s precious. Especially when they have to end their conversation and suddenly act normal when talking to McGee 😅😍 then they go separate ways and the look Ellie shoots Nick ahhhhhhh it’s almost like a let’s table this but also shit we really did half open that can of worms in the middle of a work day. Nick sighs and looks briefly to the sky like shit what did I do in a good way and bad way haha. 

Back to Kasie with the ✨iconic✨ lines I love herrrr. Ellie being sus again with being resistant to change. I can’t decide if she’s not only talking about the possibility of dating Nick (once again defensive because Kasie about came for her throat hahahah) but also maybe about whatever is going to go down with Odette 👀👀

HERE WE ARE. THE MOMENT WE’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. Back to being cute little awkward idiots in love that need to have The Talk™️. I mean come on they’re trying so hard to avoid the actual talk and just dancing around it “so” “so” “talk a roo” “talk a reeno” excuse me what the fuck are you saying just SAY IT. And Nick is still ready and rearing to go but also wants to respect Ellie and give her space if needed so he offers to just agree The Talk™️ needs to be had. And of course she counters with “need is a strong word” because damn this girl is spiraling. She’s so terrified of the outcome of this talk she wants to deny it needs to exist but still she can’t help it at the end of the day. And Nick is still like ok BUT WHEN. I WANT TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU AFTER YOU TELL ME YOU LOVE ME. SO LIKE WHEN ELLIE WHEN. And he once again plays off her deflection (a theme of this episode) with yeah yeah they’re super tired not at all wired just thinking about this talk that is at the tip of his tongue. At least Ellie is finally seeing the light and realizes that they should promise to have The Talk™️ but as she sits there staring at the elevator in front of her she’s like oh fuck, it can’t be soon can it. Fuck fuck fuck I can’t hold this in longer, we can’t keep dancing around it. fuck. So when Nick once again tries to press her to nail down a time she’s like well fuck it let’s do this shit now. Then she can’t realized that shit I actually said it, I actually said that. I said we should have The Talk™️ now. And Nick’s genuine surprise mirrors hers because she’s been the one half-denying The Talk™️ all day and now she wants to do this right here right now??? But at the same time he’s got a little smile to his face because he loves the idea of her being on board and finally getting this done. Finally getting to hear how she feels. 

So they walk into the elevator with a MUCH better vibe than the last time they walked in all serious at night (looking at you dumb Nick with Elena) but I guess the Elena Elevator Talk walked so the Ellie Elevator Talk could run 👀

And Nick while yes he’s ready for this shit to finally happen he’s still vulnerable, still terrified of opening himself up because he’s seen his dad (recently) and how commitment and relationships run in the family 🙄 plus this is all very new to him outside of Sofia and this is definitely not new to Ellie (Jake, qasim). He needs to hear she’s all-in too, needs to know he hasn’t built something up in his head for something serious when she views it as just a flirtation between friends. So he nervously says ladies first and while Ellie gives him a look of protest and wtf man, I think deep down she knows this is all so difficult for him despite how much he’s pushed it over the course of the day plus SHE is ready to get this out in the open. The moment she decided to stop denying and spiraling she went full force head on let’s talk about us. She hedges for a second and Nick continues to be nervous as she’s clearly building up her own nerve. Then she says probably the exact same moment he’s thinking of- or at least one of them- the jail cell. The defining, triggering moment that set this thing at full speed. He can’t believe she’s really saying the words, about to hear what he hopes is his feeling of that jail cell reciprocated in her words and his head turns quickly to look at her, unable to believe his ears that what he’s been dying for all along is going to happen. The Talk™️ is happening and damn it seems like it’s happening in the right direction. 

Of course we have no damn clue what was said and I’m jaded and don’t think they’ll ever tell us- RIP the note. BUT I’m so glad it actually happened (and the cinematographic parallels of course), a STEP towards canon!Ellick I’m fine. 

Now to see where they take this from here in the last two episodes and I can only hope an angst filled canon!Ellick because duh. 

[ereawrites]

Tim Drake x Reader - Envy

The first time he realises it's more than a stupid crush is mid-summer, sweat across the back of his neck, ice in his drink. Bruce has had a tough few weeks, and he's learning to surround himself with the people he cares about in times like these: besides, the weather is gorgeous, a rarity for Gotham, and so Bruce throws an extended family barbecue. 'Family' has always been a little tough to define, for Tim and for many others who share the Wayne name. Some - Dick, Jason, Damian, Cass - feel as though they could be his blood siblings, like they share more than a name and a vigilante identity and a proclivity for violence. Duke, Kon, and Jon have somehow become his annoying cousins who say, let me play the games on your phone, Tim, I know you get the unreleased ones, don't lie, but he loves them all the same.

It's when he sees you talking to Steph, the distant ex who he now considers one of his closest friends, that the depth of his feelings really hits him. You're in a swimsuit - he shouldn't stare, he shouldn't, it's summer and it's hot and it's perfectly normal for you to want to enjoy the pool while you're at the manor - with a cocktail in hand, golden sun catching in your hair, a warm smile lighting up your features, eyes crinkled up at the corners with laughter. Maybe Steph is telling an anecdote about the family; perhaps you're just enjoying this perfect day.

A giggle spills from your lips, shiny with the cherry-flavoured lip balm he knows you use, right as your gaze wanders across the pool and meets Tim's own. Although he's quick to react, transforming his face into a friendly smile and giving you a small wave, he has to fight back a blush from the shame of almost being caught staring. He isn't a creep. He isn't.

"Tim!", you exclaim, as he crosses around the pool and makes his way over to you and Steph. "I didn't know you could even come out in the sun! I hope you're wearing sunscreen."

Steph smirks. "You're all... milky. How long has it been since you left your computer screen?'

Tim feels your eyes drag down over his body, probably only because Steph's just pointed out how pale he is, but he's in a swimsuit too and he can feel your gaze burning hot on every inch of exposed skin. He huffs out a sarcastic laugh. "Funny, both of you. Duke attacked me with a bottle of SPF twenty minutes ago."

You and Steph dissolve into another fit of laughter: clearly the image of his assault is amusing to you. Tim would pretend to be more annoyed than he really is, maybe play it up a little to make you both feel bad, but he knows that you're only in a good mood. Why wouldn't you be? This is the first day you've had fully to yourself in weeks - he makes a point to stay updated on your activities, but he's not a creep, it's normal to take an interest - between your schoolwork and your internship. The hard work has paid off, though, and you've just graduated at the top of your class with a path straight into a major company. He can cut you some slack for now.

"Do either of you two know where I can find Damian?", Steph pipes up suddenly after a sip of her own drink. "I've gotta talk to him."

Tim exaggerates a disgusted tremble, which only earns him a playful slap from Steph and another little giggle from you. "Poor you. He's probably walking the dogs on the other side of the garden, or something - antisocial little shit."

"Damian, antisocial? I haven't heard from you in almost three weeks, Timothy Drake! You hypocrite!", Steph cries. Three weeks? He could've sworn it was only a week ago, at most; he FaceTimed her for a catch up, and she was talking about her crush on Kon's dad, and he'd explained he'd been busy because he'd been helping you write your thesis - but, wait, it hadn't even been the final section, so it must have been longer ago than he thought, because you submitted your final draft five days ago - shit.

Tim sighs. "Sorry, Steph. Actually, sorry to both of you. I... lost track of time, I guess?"

"I'll let you off this time, Drake-", Steph narrows her eyes at him, and tips back the last of her cocktail. "But you better repay me by having another drink ready for me when I come back."

She grins widely, and heads off to find Damian: God knows why she wants to talk to him when he's being so antisocial, but she's always had a way of drawing the young boy out of his shell. Tim chuckles under his breath, and turns to smile sheepishly at you.

"And you? What do I have to do to make you forgive me?", he offers. He's half-teasing, but there's a part of him that feels guilty. It's selfish. He knows it is; he's the one who finds himself wanting to spend so much time with you, not the other way around, and he sees you more than enough. You probably haven't even realised it's been four days since you last spoke to him.

You swirl the last dregs of your drinks thoughtfully, smiling at him - God, your smile is perfect, so soft and warm and kind - and then reach out to pat him on the shoulder. "I think I'm the one who owes you, you know."

Your touch lingers for just a fraction of a second and Tim is forced to suppress a shiver. "Meaning?'

"You've spent most of your free time for months helping me with schoolwork, Timmy! There's no way I would've been able to - actually, no, I would have managed fine without help - but you made it so much easier. I wish I could do more to thank you."

Tim waves away your gratitude with a small smile. "You've done plenty - besides, I enjoyed helping you."

"Why?", you grin, and the previous playfulness you'd exhibited with Steph is beginning to spark back up in your eyes. "Because my area of study interests you so much? Or is it just because I'm your favourite person?'

There are a million ways he could play this. This stupid, summer crush has been eating at him for weeks now, and Tim knows all too well that he's bad with emotions. He has no idea which course of action he should choose: flirt, or tease, or act aloof? Dick would dazzle you with a charming grin and a compliment - Jason would make a ridiculous, suggestive joke that somehow would be flirty instead of creepy - Damian (and Tim feels indescribable shame at the fact that his younger brother would be better at this than him) would brush the teasing off in a way that only drew you in.

"...Spending time with you isn't the worst thing in the world.", Tim settles on, and he mentally kicks himself as soon as the words leave his mouth. God, he isn't a creep, but he's stupid. So stupid. Almost as stupid as he is for developing a crush in the first place.

By some saving grace, your smile only widens. "So I am your favourite person?'

He needs another drink.

"You're in danger of losing that title.", he shrugs, and begins to head for the drinks table that Alfred so thoughtfully set up - you follow without question. "But, well, I wouldn't have spent all that time with you if, you know, I didn't like you. It was actually... kind of fun."

You fix yourself your own cocktail at the same time as him. It must be your favourite, since it's the same as the last one you were drinking, and Tim has to remind himself again that he's not a creep as he wonders how it would feel to kiss the taste of sweet alcohol off your lips. It's just a crush. He's going to get over it.

"Aww - I knew you loved me! Seriously, though - I did really enjoy spending that time with you. Even if you did spend half of it vibrating from caffeine overload, and the other half shouting at me for drinking caffeine myself.", you say.

He shrugs. "It's bad for you." Hypocrisy normally gets to Tim, but he can excuse the bad habit for himself. He can't help but worry about you.

The words that spill from your fruit-stained lips in response - teasing, as always, no more than that, stop it - and the glint in your eye and the little quirk of your mouth upwards; something about it just feels different and it makes his stomach lurch. "You're a bad influence, Timmy. I like it."

Fuck. He sips at his drink, too much vodka for his liking and too little ice, but oh well: he's got bigger things to worry about, like hiding how thickly he swallows. Like pretending he doesn't notice the faint sheen of sweat coating your collarbones, and the dip of your throat, spreading across your shoulders and down, down, dipping to your stomach - he pretends he doesn't notice. It's hot. You're warm. And a bit of sweat shouldn't get to him as much as it does.

"Every person here is a bad influence. You asked me for help, anyway. I'm starting to regret doing it.". That's a blatant lie and you both know it, but Tim doesn't know quite how to react other than with sarcasm. He feels like he's dancing with you every time he speaks to you, skating on paper-thin ice but loving the thrill - don't be so fucking dramatic, it's just a crush, stop it.

You roll your eyes and place your glass down onto the table. "I'm sorry. You're a fantastic influence, and you've made the last few months far more bearable. Thank you. I mean it."

And then you bring one hand to his shoulder, a feather-light touch that still sends him practically careening into ecstasy, and before Tim quite realises what's happening, you're pressing a friendly kiss to his left cheek.

You pull back with a smile. "I'll stop giving you shit for today, but only because I'm so grateful."

You just fucking kissed him. You were barely an inch away from his lips, close enough that he could almost smell your drink on your lips, and it was only a friendly gesture and he knows you do it with everyone and he knows it doesn't mean anything, to you, at least - but, to Tim, you've just punched right through his chest and grabbed his heart and squeezed, tight, snatched the breath right from his lungs and all rational thought from his brain; he wants, so badly, to lean forward and kiss you for real this time. He would, if he had the courage. He would, if he knew you felt the same way.

This is more than a stupid, summer crush.

Tim wants you to kiss him again. He wants to take your hand and parade you around the barbecue on his arm. He would lick the sweat off your fucking collarbones, if you would only let him. Maybe he is a creep. He doesn't care anymore.

Another sip of his drink. He's so fucked.

You don't notice the way his jaw tenses, or the way his breathing quickens; why would you? You're not looking for any kind of reaction, because, for you, it was just a kiss on the cheek, nothing more, nothing worthy of a revelation of his feelings.

"Oh, Tim - look, Kon's coming over!", you nudge him with your elbow, drink back in hand. Tim's too shellshocked to do anything other than follow your gaze, right over to where Kon's walking over to the two of you. He must have been in the pool with Jon and Dick, because his hair is wet and rivulets of water are running down his chest - Tim doesn't think he'll ever really get used to his best friend being so absolutely ripped. He hates it.

Kon fixes you with a beaming grin. "Hey, guys! What's with all the drinking? I though barbecues were for having fun and eating, not an alcohol club."

Tim forces a smirk: Kon will see right through him if he isn't careful, figure out what’s going on. The smile on your face, though, is wide and genuine, almost as big as Kon's.

"Says Aquaman over here.", you giggle. Kon shakes his head, flicking water at you, and you squeal and dash behind Tim.

Droplets of pool water land on Tim's face, filling his nose with the scent of chlorine instead of the scent of your drink, and he mourns the loss. "Careful, Kon. Chlorine can burn our skin right off. You wouldn't want to hurt us, right?"

The other male's eyes widen comically, and he mouths a seriously at Tim, concern evident in his gaze. Having a half-alien best friend has its drawbacks, but it's worth it for the tricks Tim gets to play.

You peek over Tim's shoulder and, upon determining that the coast is clear, step out and pout at him. "Don't tease - Kon, don't listen. He's stringing you along."

Tim scowls at you. "Fuck - you couldn't have played along for a few minutes? Seriously?"

Kon lets out a hearty chuckle, and out of nowhere he reaches his hand out towards you - for a moment, Tim just stares at it, wondering why his best friend is offering his hand to you. Then, you take it, that soft smile on your face, and Kon's pulling you into his chest and you're squeezing his hand and he's kissing you gently on the forehead.

"I knew I could rely on you.", Kon smiles, brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face. The penny begins to drop for Tim, but it's as if it's in slow motion - he sees the grand reveal coming, but he it doesn't quite sink in just yet.

You turn back to face Tim, keeping your fingers interlaced with Kon's so his arm wraps around your body and settles on your waist, pressing you into his side. "I - uh, sorry, Tim. Kon's still... getting the hang of how much PDA is acceptable."

Oh. Tim should have seen this coming. He should have noticed the signs; they all spring up in his mind now, the way Kon only ever seemed to blush around you, and the way Tim's noticed you checking Kon out during training a few times (he'd not thought much of it, you'd be blind not to), and the way both of you have been so suspiciously quiet about your love lives lately - maybe to protect his feelings, to make him feel like he's not the odd-one-out of the group, to avoid excluding him.

"It's fine,", he lies. "But, well - PDA? I didn't realise you two were... close like that."

Why is he torturing himself by asking for details?

You offer him an apologetic look. "I know you've been really busy, lately - you know, with work, and stuff. I thought it would be best to hold off on telling you about anything going on until you had less on your plate."

You don't say it with pity, like you know that he's been harbouring feelings for you: no, it's just friendly concern, knowing that he would want to know about your new crush and help you navigate it, because Tim is shit with his own feelings but he's got a penchant for helping others with their own.

"Thanks for being considerate. I wouldn't have minded helping you, you know.", Tim says. Another lie. It would have absolutely fucking killed him to help you, but at least he would have seen this coming. At least he could have prepared.

Kon squeezes you into his side, and then releases you so he can pour himself a drink. His bright blue eyes, kind and piercing, prompt Tim to speak again. "And, Kon - come on, buddy. Why didn't you say anything to me?"

Kon chuckles warmly. "I guess I didn't really realise what I was feeling, you know? I mean, I knew that it was different, but I didn't exactly know what it meant... or how to explain it."

Another piece of the puzzle falls into place. There's a domino effect in Tim's mind and right now he hates how intelligent he is, wishes he could turn it off for a second if only so that he would stop making deductions about this relationship that's sprung up right under his nose.

"You made the first move, then?", he asks, directed at you, and he can feel his smile starting to slip. There are beads of water on your waist in the wake of Kon's touch.

You let out a small, almost embarrassed laugh - Kon returns to your side, not touching you this time, but still standing in a way that makes it seem as though he's protecting you. "You could put it that way. I mean, nothing's official yet - no one even knows other than you and Steph and Jon, we're still figuring it out. We don't wanna make a big deal, you know?'

Tim doesn't know. He nods anyway. "I'm happy for you both."

The smile on his lips - vodka, ice, fruit - falters just a little too much and he knows Kon notices it. Bright blue eyes soften in worry, his mouth moves to ask if Tim's alright, but Tim just glances back at you; small smile on your lips, golden sun in your hair, happy.

"I'll have to go make sure that Bruce and Jason aren't in danger of blowing us all up in a gas explosion. I'll catch up with you two after.", Tim says, just before Kon can get any words out. He gestures aimlessly in the direction of the barbecue, and you and Kon nod in unison - together, a couple - and Tim throws back the last of his drink before he leaves.

He should be happy for you - he is, in a way, glad that Kon's found someone he can be vulnerable with and you've found someone who makes you happy. He should have been more convincing - he doesn't want either of you to worry. He should have seen this coming. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He should never have let himself start feeling anything for you in the first place.

Maybe, Tim thinks as he heads into the cool air of the manor and slips into a quiet room, closing the door behind him - maybe, if you hadn't have kissed him on the cheek, it would've been easier. He could've kept telling himself that this was just a stupid, summer crush, and it would've went away by the time the first snow fell in Gotham, and if worst came to worst he could've called Steph and distracted himself for a few nights. The thought of that, of touching anyone else, makes him feel sick now.

Tim runs his hands through his hair and tugs desperately at the ends. He has no idea how he's meant to come back out to the barbecue, watch Kon kiss the taste of sweet alcohol off your lips, think about Kon's hands on your body - he can't do this. He can't.

[nightswithkookmin]

IS JIKOOK REAL?

In light of everything that's happened over the course of the month: Taekook in the Soop, the missing birthday post on Jimin's birthday and the following silence that's ensued in its aftermath- we are all still waiting for Jimin's birthday VLive; every Jikook fan past and present, deep and shallow, I feel, is left wondering whether Jikook was ever as real as bigfoot and the Easter bunny, a figment of our imagination. Is Jikook real, we all wonder.

Now, I can't answer the later with Vim and Vigor without opening myself up to all kinds of law suits under the sun- I don't care much for the skepticism and ridicule that usually follows. Nor can I in good conscience come out here and outrightly out these two that I feel are in fact a couple and dating. That would be very hypocritical of me.

The best I can do in this instance is to stream my consciousness and share with you why I believe them to be a couple? Let the records show, I am full on delusional. *smiling.

I think when it comes to Jikook the universal consensus within the fandom is that they have a really special bond. We can all agree on that much. Their bond is unique and just plain beautiful; the days of disclarity and obscurity over whether they even like each other long gone.

Thus I refrain from indulging in any conversation that calls to question the intentions of either party towards the other when either act in a certain way that most find displeasing. Such as, questions about why JK didn't promote Promise or Friends, why he didn't wish JM a happy birthday. Is Jk envious of Jimin or vice versa, etc.

Such questions as simple and as innocuous as they may seem are always hard for me to answer. JK promoted Promise, had the funniest reaction video to it. He promoted Lie, every chance he got with teasing Jimin's dance moves in Lie, literally had a gun to Jimin to perform Lie in run and that hand on his heart said it all. Is that not promotion enough?

We heard serendipity, you are me, I am you and the many tireless times JK has talked about it- he won't shut up about it. What more does he need to do to show he loves and supports Jimin's career?

I find when people ask these kinds of questions that they are operating on the mentality that JK doesn't love Jimin *enough* or worse that Jikook ought to love each other in a certain kind of way, their own arbitrary ways and to their own satisfaction.

I keep reiterating that this is their love and their relationship. Ours is just to observe how they are choosing to express that love for eachother and uWu while we are at it. Lol

That's not to say that we shouldn't have certain expectations of them if we believe them to be a couple. Expectations are important and necessary to sustaining our belief in them as a couple. But that expectation should be reasonable and should be determined by the patterns of behavior we see in them towards eachother, towards the group and with consideration to their values, culture and beliefs- stay with me.

If our expectations of them is that they are not loving eachother enough or in a way that satisfies and appeases our spirits then that's no longer expectations. That's projecting.

Thus, I'm often discombobulated by the questions i recieve on the quality of love they express towards each other because quality is relative and highly subjective.

Jikook only have so much room to express their love and affection for eachother since they are not out yet and so we may not fully be privy to the extent of the love they express for each other much less to ascertain its quality.

The space they inhabit is a working space and when the cameras turn on it is work and business...

That being said, what they are not doing within this constricted space they have is equally as important as what they are doing within this space. Whereas questions of the quality of their love is irrelevant, to me as an Alt shipper at least, I find questions of the degree of love between them highly important.

Jikook's special bond is indisputable. The conflict then has always been about labels, whether or not that bond they share is purely platonic, romantic or something in between- the degree of love between them.

And I see there are different schools of thought on this matter. There are those who operate on the assumption that Jikook are just special friends and reserve the possibility that they could be something more to them.

Then there are those who believe they are real or could be real but reserve the possibility that they could also not be real.

These are the conventional shippers. They play it safe. Good for them. But then there are the full on delulu folks such as myself who are risk takers and go all in or nothing- alternative shipping.

To me Jikook is real or I am not shipping them in the way that I ship them at all. Lol. Chileee, I prefer Yoonmin, Minimoni, Jihope, Vmin, Jinminkook, Vminkook as conventional ships for fun and what not. Jikook has always been that alternative ship for me.

And as an alternative ship, what Jikook do for eachother is equally as important to me as what they do not do for eachother. If Jikook are real then I think it's imperative that we have reasonable expectations of them in the way that they behave with eachother, enough to distinctify them as a couple within the group.

Couples are expected to behave in a certain way marked and defined by the couples themselves but that also set them apart nonetheless. Some people choose to be in an open relationship, may be friends with benefit etc but will still exude certain patterns of behavior definitive in itself that it distinguishes them from mere friends.

If Jikook are a couple they will define their relationship in a way that sets a standard for them such that this standard sets them apart from the rest of the group. And I think I have mentioned some of those standards as intimacy, speaking eachothers love language, exclusivity and the right to claim amongst others.

Yes JK loves JM and vice versa but are they loving eachother as friends or lovers? What are the patterns of behavior they put up or not put up to distinctify themselves as a couple within the group if they are one?

Yes Taekook are friends, but are they putting up distinctive characteristics that set them apart from Jikook? The answer is a resounding no- atatattatatatat, no buts. I'll bitch slap you. Lol

Tae cuddles Jimin and shares a bed with him but that is ok because they are besties soulmates. Vmin cute. Tae cuddles JK and suddenly the fandom is in uproar? Chilee, what's y'all on?

This is why I shy away from conventional shippers- well, some. The tendency they have to dismiss certain certain moments when they happen or import standards into Jikook's dynamics based on their own understanding of intimacy and romance without taking into consideration what Jikooks understanding of romance and intimacy is baffles me.

These are the people who would scream why is Jimin blowing kisses at Suga here, why is Jk cuddling Tae there without considering whether skinship with others is a deal breaker for Jikook. JK does skinship with Jin, Tae and suddenly they are questioning whether Jikook is real- I really can't relate.

If skinship is not a deal breaker for Jikook then such reactions to moments like these are nothing but censorship of JK and Jimin's behaviors and goes to question the quality of their love which as I said is irrelevant to the determining of the realness of Jikook.

If you think these skinship they do with others are disrespectful towards eachother then indirectly you are saying Jikook's relationship is toxic- but toxic relationships are still relationships and so that doesn't invalidate Jikook's relationship or disprove it.

If you expect JM to behave in a certain way because you think he is in a relationship with JK or vice versa that is no longer reasonable expectations of them but blatant censorship.

Put censorship aside, the question of the quality of their relationship aside, our own personal idiosyncrasies aside and hopes- what do you see?

REASONABLE EXPECTATIONS

I mentioned above how it's imperative to have reasonable expectations of Jikook if you believe them to be a real couple because without these expectations Jikook is no different from any other ship in BTS.

I talked about what constitutes reasonable expectations though and attempted to outline what doesn't count as reasonable expectations but allow me to shed more light on it for the sake of dissolving any ambiguity around the term.

Unreasonable expectations are those expectations we have that result in us questioning the validity of Jikooks relationship without cause. They often result in us assuming something is wrong between Jikook because we feel there is something we ought to see in their interactions because we are used to seeing them in Jikook dynamics.

Unreasonable expectations is drilled in us by false conditionings. Some of these false conditionings are external to Jikook, such as our exposure to analysis videos or edited videos. They often condition us to think Jikook are in BTS to screw eachother seven ways through the roof all year round. We tend to forget quickly that when the cameras turn on it's all work for them.

The worst part is, we get used to the slowed down gazes, the two seconds lingering stares and touches that go on for minutes in these edited videos and so whenever we are exposed to actual content from BigHit in real time we feel JK didn't stare too long, JM didn't laugh at JK's Jokes therefore something is wrong.

Some false conditionings are induced in us by Jikook themselves.

Take for instance, Jimlous and Jeonlous. Are these something to be considered reasonable expectations for us to have of Jikook because we see them do this all the time? Absolutely not.

While jealousy is an integral part of the Korean dating culture- allegedly, it is subject to the mental state, personal values and growth of Jikook.

As they mature, they may outgrow certain behaviors not limited to Jimlous/Jeonlous. It is thus unreasonable to expect these of Jikook all the time.

Coupled with long exposures to edited videos, we soon become conditioned to expect Jk or Jimin to react strongly to when the other seemingly crosses boundaries with others- aka skinship.

If you expect JK to pout each time Jimin smiles at another member and they don't, it simply means you are stuck in the past and aren't growing with them on their love journey. It doesn't mean something is wrong with Jikook or that Jikook is not real.

That doesn't mean Jeonlous is not important. It is a distinctifier. In my opinion.

Jikook are able to enforce boundaries with each other because they have the right to. I keep saying they are the only pair in BTS that has and exercise this right of claim over eachother. Jimlous/ Jeonlous is how we know they feel a boundary has been crossed and depending on the situation or environment they would often exercise that right of claim.

I have said, the only times I feel they don't and can't exercise this right of claim is if they are not a couple and just friends- when they are broken up. I saw this because even in official settings they seem to have this right of claim even if they are not exercising it.

What I'm trying to say is certain behaviors and patterns of behavior in Jikook are distinctifiers in that they set them apart from the other pairs and those distinctifiers can be reasonably expected of Jikook and so if we don't see those in them- over a period of time mind you, then questions and brows ought to be raised as high up as possible. If Jikook is not real then frankly I want to know. I'm not about to believe in bigfoot.

What I'm saying basically is, whereas Jeonlous and Jimlous are not a distinctifier perse as such shouldn't be reasonably expected of them, right of claim is a distinctifier and should be reasonably expected.

Skinship is not a distinctifier- if I have to repeat this one more time I swear to god imma wield JK's pan on y'all. Lol but deadass.

Now, is JK wishing JM a happy birthday openly on social media reasonable expectation? Come now, Y'all don know I had a complete meltdown over this on my TL. Of course I'm gone bring it up. Lol

Jikook wishing eachother a happy birthday on social media is reasonable expectations to have if it is a distinctifier or something that sets Jikook apart from the rest of the members. Is it? The answer is a flat ass no.

I mentioned that one of the reasons I believe Jikook is real is because I feel out of all the pairs in BTS they are the ones that speak eachother's love language.

Jimin loves to be made to feel special. Jk makes Jimin feel special. I mean he did gift JM a present without doing same for the others so it's safe to assume he gives Jimin special treatment on his birthdays- as should he. Mr Park set the standards high for his man.

Y'all know I was on my personal agenda with this whole JM birthday thingy. I was hoping Jk was going to post but only for Jimin and make a statement with it- a girl can dream.

The fact that he didn't post doesn't mean he didn't make JM feel special on his birthday. Had JM and BTS not talked openly about JK buying JM a present when he didn't do that for the others, frankly we wouldn't have known he ever did that for JM.

It sort of leaves you wondering what goes on behind the cameras. I mean if memories 2019 is anything to go by, Jikook is closer than we think.

Jikook show us a lot but there are a lot more we don't see.

In their early dynamics he used to do alot for JM that he seemed uncomfortable showing openly. We only knew of those moments through Jimin who seemed giddy and excited about them and would often overshare those information.

Personally, I feel whatever they did for Jimin on his Birthday is going to show up in a Bangtan Bomb or something in the future.

Due to BTS' inability to hold physical concerts due to the virus, I feel BigHit are on an agenda to increase demand and patronage for BTS content online by creating scarcity and making BTS less available and accessible- demand and supply, economics 101. They ain't slick. Bless them.

Social media is an outlet for Jikook. In my opinion. It is one of the means through which they express themselves individually and as a couple. But it's my understanding that Jikook use these outlets in different ways.

While JK uses it as an outlet to express his feelings because of his introvertedness, Jimin uses it as a means to connect with his fans and build their platform.

What I mean is, if JK is feeling happy he is going to come on here and tweet, cup of milk let's rock and roll. When Jimin doesn't pick up his calls, he's gonna come here and tweet it's hard to love. And when JinMin leave him out of a VLive he's gone drag his man's ass to film an impromptu live with him- bless him.

Jimin I find doesn't show up on social media on impulse as JK does- we all know what happens when he does. Thats when the multiple tweets and misspelled names roll in.

Jimin's presence online is often curated, in my opinion. He will often make time to talk and share his thoughts and feelings with Army to connect with them. It's the quality time love language bit in him.

Together, they use social media as an outlet to tease their relationship as a means to relieve the stress that comes with hiding their relationship. Their relationship. They do this through the flirty banter thingy they do on line- posting after eachother, responding to each other's messages etc.

An example is the recent Weverse thingy JK did which I posted about. And more recently, the D5/D4 posts they shared on Twitter where JK posted a picture of his mic on stage, an Army Logo and a purple heart. Which together read, JK purple's Army.

Jimin responded with a complimentary post of himself performing in a black and white photo with the hashtag Jimin, I miss Army. Now you don't need me to tell you what that means and if you think it's a coincidence- sorry to you.

When JK does these things, he is often connecting with Jimin, reaching out. Not every post he sends is about Jimin or intended for Jimin. I find usually the ones that are about Jimin, Jimin responds to them through his own posts or that they will have something in them that indirectly points to Jimin.

Like the 123 song recommendations or even recently the pinky ring, sky and cup of milk photo he posted after his birthday VLive.

A lot of people kept saying perhaps the chrome heart ring he wore on his pinky was a gift from Jimin. It could be. But I think the pinky was reference to the pinky ring Joke he shared on stage when he took Jimin's ring and put it on his pinky.

The blue sky reference, well... you know. But I was more concerned about the blurred out yet visible tags on the buildings in the background- this is weird for me to say out loud but I felt the message of that post was we are not hiding. Don't mind me.

Jimin loves to flaunt their bond and flex it on social media. He gets giddy and excited when Jk shows his affections, interest and attraction to him.

I have said JK and JM have two different personalities and while often Jimin is loud, open and overwhelmingly affectionate, JK is equally intense with his affections but at his choosing. They both have intense feelings and passions for eachother but they express it in different ways due to their different personalities.

Jikook are together but they are on their own unique personal journeys of growth as well. And as much as they start certain traditions, they also end certain traditions. This is especially true for JK.

He is the one who started their 123 coded flirty banter and he is the same person who ended that tradition with the ending scene post he shared on Twitter.

Because JK likes to retract and conceal aspects of himself, often I value and pay more attention to the things he does share than the things he don't.

And because Jimin is very loud and forward with his expressions, I value and lay attention to the things he does not share more so than the things he shares.

Often I hear people say Jimin acts the same with everyone, he is so openly affectionate so certainly his love for JK doesn't go beyond platonic feelings nor can it be exclusive to JK.

That's just the thing with JM's persona. It is so loud it blurs the line between his true self and his idol self.

The boy in love with Jungkook is a facade. That is the role Jimin took on at debut. If you don't know this you've been played. If you dislike JK's brand of love, his way of expressing his love for Jimin because of this persona Jimin has you owe Jk an apology.

That one person who loves Jungkook unconditionally in BTS is just a performance. All BTS were given roles, a marketing role to sell the bromance and sell the fans. Most of them have since out grown those persona's and those kinds of performances- especially JK.

JM still holds on to his persona compared to the others in my opinion: that hypersexualized, aigyo cute persona, a bit brazen, confident, shameless etc. He projects a lot of himself into this persona but I feel often he injects bits of this persona into his real identity as a way to break himself out his limitations as Park Jimin-That never mind tattoo is there for a reason.

And so when he is being loud and daring and a tease that's not when I find his love for JK. His love resides in the calmness of his storms. In his moments of quiet when he isn't screaming and disappearing while he laughs; when he is staring at JK, taking in his visage as if he is the most beautiful thing on earth- that's when you see all the love he has for him in his face. He never does this with any of the members.

When JK is injured and he switches off his loud persona, that's when you see the real park Jimin.

I don't know which is worse, people who believe this sick persona of his is real or the people who see this persona for what it is but fail to look deeper than that.

Then there are those who believe they are dating but then dismiss certain questionable things when they happen in their dynamics. Isn't that why some people believe Taekook is real? in spite of Jikook? How can you believe a ship to be real when the existence of another ship calls into question the entire ship and not just aspects of it? It beats me.

Are they any ship in BTS that calls Jikook into question? I'll leave you to answer this.

If your answer is wrong, I'm blocking you.

Signed,

GOLDY

[brave-clarice]

“Clarice” Liveblog: Episode 2

Again, some extremely unfashionably late hot takes.

(Special thanks to @kathrynethegreat and @special-agent-pendragon​ for encouraging another liveblog!)

Clarice is working out! And eating junk food! I love it.

and cleaning her gun!

hey, Ardelia is drinking what I’m going to assume is her grandmother’s “smart people tea”.

Krendler disciplining Clarice already is infuriating but appropriate.

“I lost control.” Oh no, I don’t like that. Don’t make Clarice unstable. Her mental and emotional state never had anything to do with her failing career.

getting weird mixed signals from Ardelia. Last week, she obviously didn’t want Clarice to lie/stick to the script Krendler gave her, but now she’s telling Clarice she messed up by not doing so...?

“I better know you if you’re calling this early.” Amen, Ardelia.

I’m in love: this cinematography is straight out of the film (when she’s flying to WV with Crawford)!

“When’s the last time you went back to Appalachia?” “It’s been years.” What??? It has NOT been years--Clarice was JUST in West Virginia last week as well as in Silence, and she arguably attended college there as well. (UVA is at least nestled in the mountains, and you don’t have to drive far outside the Albemarle Valley to hit Appalachia proper.) After all the details about her character they’ve been nailing, they miss this glaring error? 

I like the tiny details she’s noticing (like the guy biting his nails). Not only because she’s an investigator, but because it’s reminiscent of Hannibal’s influence (imo).

Clarice Is Short: The Saga continues

still not getting any creepy vibes off Krendler. He’s going to be much less effective as an antagonist if he isn’t lewd as well as a dick.

I really don’t care for the way the opening “credits” fade out from the death’s-head moth to Clarice’s face. There are MANY animals that represent her, or parts of her, in the books--lions, lambs, horses, and of course birds--so this choice feels empty and lazy to me.

also lazy: having a fellow agent straight-up tell her in episode 2 “you shouldn’t be in the Bureau.” Maybe in two or three years, after some further “Death Angel”-type incidents, I could see this blatant rudeness, but not yet.

“Reesey”? Thanks, I hate it.

this flashback must be of Clarice’s little brother. That answers one question I had last week. That said...Clarice’s brother doesn’t play the same role in her story that Mischa does in Hannibal’s--but this sure feels like a Mischa-esque flashback.

good: they’re finally getting to the source of Clarice’s actual trauma!

bad: this is NOT how Clarice found out about her father. In fact, that whole incident is laid out in detail in the novels, and there’s nothing overly literary/un-cinematic about it, so this feels unnecessary. “The police are here! Something happened to Daddy!” No, bad! Show, don’t tell!

she would’ve known better than to introduce herself to that kid as “Clarice Starling, FBI,” come on now.

were they regularly able to wire tap hair clips in 1993? 

actually, nothing in this show looks very 90s to me so far. I’m sad about it.

so in eighteen months, Ruth Martin has gone from a junior Senator to the Attorney freakin’ General, and now she might run for governor?? At least let her get settled in one position of power first, why don’t you!

yet more Buffalo Bill flashbacks...alas.

are they trying to make this guy another surrogate Hannibal character? He’s commenting on Clarice’s accent and the dryness of her skin, asking about who she “left behind”...it all feels very Hannibal. (I know he’s a Charismatic Cult Leader trope, too--but when played off of Clarice...)

“Ew.” “I hate this guy.” I laughed.

I understand that Clarice probably feels conflicted re: her siblings in the book, but I’m really not digging the flashbacks of this Tim Burton character her brother.

@ the writers: Clarice already has the lamb backstory/symbolism, too. We don’t need this Little Brother stuff.

*shrieking* Mrs. Starling! At the sink washing the blood out of his hat!!! 

...aaand they had to ruin it with the brother’s painfully bad dialogue. Will still be good for gif-making, though.

are we supposed to interpret all these flashbacks as Clarice being incapable of controlling her emotions/state of mind? She keeps losing herself in memories and emerging all doe-eyed and panicky. I don’t like it.

not to be a broken record but...Clarice should be TOUGH. Again, Ardelia only saw her cry once in seven years. But she’s more worked up in this scene than Jodie was in Memphis!

when Mr. Cult Leader shouts “Agent Starling! Agent Starling!” he sounds exactly like Hannibal calling her back to his cell in the asylum. That has to be intentional. 

damn, wish that I could look as good five minutes after I’ve been crying as Clarice does.

I LOVE that Ardelia gets to be the crucial behind-the-scenes book-smart partner to Clarice’s action heroine.

AG Martin’s just playing politics by turning a blind eye to the crooked sheriff. But when her own daughter was just kidnapped and almost killed, she looks like a real hypocrite.

gosh, Rebecca Breeds is great. I already hope she gets nominated for an Emmy.

so Krendler is...doing the right thing???

Clarice’s father was definitely not a sheriff. I hope she’s just exaggerating for dramatic effect. (Maybe this will be clarified later.)

she couldn’t just sit with a manipulative guy without getting emotional, but she’s cool as a cucumber while telling an extended story about her father? HmmMM.

sometimes her mannerisms and facial expressions are so much like Jodie’s that it’s uncanny, like here when she leans forward to confront the Cult Leader.

“She did it.” Damn straight!

another great callback to Silence. this show’s camera crew knows its stuff!

“He’s concerned I have some residual trauma from Bill.” I. Hate. This. Subplot--and all its OOC implications.

“Catherine was close to her father, too.” Ooh, a nice allusion to the novel! Clarice makes note of their “common wound,” the loss of a father, when she’s in Catherine’s apartment in Silence.

she is just SO pretty.

little Clarice looks a LOT like Rebecca Breeds. I hope we see some more of her. 

The Good:

the continuing visual nods to the Silence film via cinematography

Mama Starling!!!

Clarice’s “The World Will Not Be This Way Within the Reach of my Arm” attitude, refusing to leave without helping the victims.

Ardelia Mapp coming in clutch! 

Clarice being, generally, a badass

and using psychological tricks/mind games to pin the antagonist...that’s the woman who disarmed a monster with just a few words.

Rebecca Breed’s acting has been phenomenal so far.

I like Clarice’s haircut a lot better when worn down (though it’s not very practical for fieldwork, so we probably won’t see it much).

The Bad:

the continuing Buffalo Bill-related Trauma Subplot. Ugh.

all the flashbacks to Clarice’s brother (and the not-so-subtle suggestion that her brother is, symbolically, another lamb).

will the real Paul Krendler please come forward? this guy is so TAME.

the other agents’ hostility towards Clarice needs to be toned down slightly so that it can escalate. Otherwise, where’s the tension?

is this actually 1993? I’m not feeling it. Shouldn’t it have a little of that Season 1/2 X-Files aesthetic? Please give me more than once-an-episode references to pagers and fax machines!

that glaring Appalachia continuity error...it’s still bugging me.

I missed the overt Hannibal references, even though they’re not necessary to any part of this episode. A lady can dream!

Overall, I really liked this one despite my various issues with it. It started shakily but built to a great finish. The emphasis across both episodes on Clarice being in the FBI not just to “get out, get anywhere,” but out of a genuine desire to help victims has been wonderful. I just hope they don’t swerve too far into the “too traumatized and emotionally compromised to function” lane. It would be a disservice to Clarice’s character and to her journey (and would smack too much of “Hannibal really did prey on her weak mind/brainwash her”.

Things I’d still like to see: More of her personality. Her hobbies and interests. That she’s cleaning her gun is great! Now let’s see “Poison Oakley” practicing her sharpshooting skills. Or car shopping. Or clothes shopping to show off her “developing taste.” (Ardelia can come!) I’ll take literally anything. Give us more of Clarice’s sense of humor as well. She had some subtle funny moments in the pilot, and it’s nice to see Rebecca smile for a change.

And Krendler? Smear that man in grease! I appreciated a happy ending even though Clarice’s career is, as we know, already in a downward spiral--the last thing we want is for every episode to be a slog, especially when a good chunk of the audience hasn’t read the book and doesn’t know Clarice is doomed to fail in the Bureau.

However... Krendler’s not a “redemption arc” kind of character. Or even a “run-of-the-mill sexist asshole” character. This is a man who spent seven years systematically sabotaging a young woman’s career because a) he was jealous that she solved the Gumb case before him, and b) she wouldn’t fuck him. He was a Justice Department official working fist-in-glove with a serial child molester who was planning some of the heinous vigilante justice imaginable. THAT’S why his very gruesome end at Hannibal’s hands felt deserved--even Clarice thought so! In short, he needs to get nasty.

Anyway, thanks for coming to another long-overdue TedTalk. Fingers crossed that the next one will be more timely (aiming for Sunday night)! 

[fatoudixon]

Bruh you're so annoying always trying to police what everyone enjoys or watches. Just let people enjoy what they want to enjoy it's not that hard. You want more wlw? Then ask for it, fill Netflix comments asking for more wlw shows, don't get mad because a small production with a low budget is doing fine, that's so stupid. Young Royals is one of the only shows who doesn't try to make teens act like adults, it has great characters and the cast is amazing. Don't project your anger in this show when there's million others shows you could criticize that ACTUALLY make teenagers act way too sexual and contribute to fetishism. This is not one of them.

lmao i just wanna laugh because this message literally said i have no clue what i'm talking about, so let's dissect every point.

how am i trying to police what people watch when i literally said I AM NOT SAYING DON'T ENGAGE WITH THIS CONTENT AS THAT WOULD BE HYPOCRITICAL SINCE I WATCHED IT. nor did i say don't enjoy it. what i did say was that we need to address this show suffers from blatant fetishisation. which is clear to see but that clearly went over your head.

also, i have never seen such a dumb take. just ask netflix?? sure jan. like people haven't been asking netflix to keep wlw shows/introduce more all this time. netflix as any other capitalistic entity cares about a) money or b) capitalising on something when it's viral (doing a bunch of blm related content when blm was trending etc). if they see wlw doesn't sell, they won't invest in it as much. and why doesn't it sell, do you ask yourself that question or are you not smart enough to understand that if we are in a position where a mlm and a wlw can be picked, the mlm will always be the first choice for the main couple as it can appeal to both straight and men loving women, as well as gay men and lesbians since they can at least identify with the queer aspect of it. with a wlw, the story varies.

or can't you see that most of the stories we have that include wlw are in shows that have a lot of other arcs happening. in mostly main character focused shows, mlm tend to be more visible.

now, let's go with the next one: young royals is a small production with a small budget???? this one actually made me laugh for a good 5 minutes not gonna lie. you clearly understand very little about tv/film and it shows. and let's assume for the sake of your argument that netflix wasn't involved for most of it, only got involved at the end. having netflix to promote your show when they decide it's profitable to do so, means you will reach so many fucking people. same can't be said with actual wlw shows netflix produced, where they barely promoted it. the fans were the ones doing that job.

last but not least: i did say the show was tame. i see the appeal of the show, of the characters and i legit never even commented on anything else besides the fandom. once again, your defensiveness just shows you are bothered about the fetishising comment without actually trying to be critical and seeing why i said what i said. but just in case you are still confused, yes, this show is yet another confirmation that having attractive male leads is enough to fuel people and elevate shows to stardom. the show includes one of the biggest AU tropes ever so of course. all of it ties together in a little bow that leads to fetishisation and self insertion in the story. if you are not a fetishiser you literally don't need to be pressed about my opinion. you just kinda have to be blissfully unaware to have the audacity to say it isn't happening. have a good' day noonie, and legit don't bother replying because i will not read or engage on this topic anymore. i say my peace and i am okay with what i said.