#what in hell is bad 5 kings

[littlestardescendants]

Satan is the type of MF to tear your whole fireplace/chimney off the house because you swooned at pictures of him instead of the real thing.

Mammon is the type of MF to buy a whole beach and then change the whole sand to it because you said you liked pink sand one time.

Beelzebub is the type of MF to use your deodorant or even eat it because it was on your sweaty armpits once.

Leviathan is the type of MF to grief a whole online server because you dumped him in minecraft.

Lucifer is the type of MF to see this ALL HAPPEN then tell you about it only AFTER you hit post nut clarity to ruin the good feelings.

[mv1simp]

inspired by my fav @piastrification thank you for being in my walls 🫶🫶 hope you enjoy!!

Streets ♥️

Max Verstappen x PR Manager!Reader

we play our fantasies out in real life ways, and no final fantasy, can we end these games, though?

6 months ago, F1 champion Max Verstappen traded in his status as "serious cat dad with road rage issues" for "Genius. Playboy. Millionaire. Philanthropist". Since then you've been fighting absolute demons as his PR manager to keep his reputation clean in the media. After you tell him you've had enough, he proposes a very interactive solution to your problem.

Content includes: Humour, crackfic, fluff, so much sexual tension, 18+ MDNI, smut, playboy!max, exasperated manager! reader, a very well rounded fic for once?! 4.7k WC

If someone asked you where it’d all gone downhill, you’d have to say it started because of that greedy paparrazi rat Henri - photographer at the MonacoDaily, otherwise known as every PR manager’s sleep paralysis demon. Because this particular paparazzo had a nasty knack for capturing celebrities just as they made the most atrocious decisions known to mankind. And he had an even nastier knack for threatening to sell said photos to the highest bidder. Truly, it was a dark day for any media team when they were forced to bargain with such a foul demon, who’d be able to go toe to toe with the likes of Satan himself.

So when your phone dinged at 5am on a peaceful Sunday morning, only to reveal the 7th (7th!!) message this month from the very same greedy little rat, you threw it across the room. Only to then remember you devastatingly had not been born into a Dubai oil family and you needed this job to pay Monaco rent. The text turns out to be a photo of your aggravating client - Max Verstappen, F1 champion driver, loving father to two cats, and more recently, certified manwhoreTM. He’s living upto your nickname for him, pictured in some nightclub with a half naked blonde sitting on his lap. Alright, alright, not as bad as you were expecting, you could even photoshop the girl’s hair colour to match his current girlfriend’s one maybe? Well, except the brunette woman glaring behind him is his current model girlfriend of the month. You hear a ding, another text from Henri - this time with just a 😈 and 💸👀. You throw the phone back against wall.

Three hours later you’ve cleaned up the PR nightmare and are banging on Max’s apartment door. He blearily lets you in, shirtless and still looking half drunk, but you don’t hesitate to yank him by his beltloops and drag him to the dining table (after quickly checking out that broad chest of his, though, cause goddamn. You’re just a girl.)

Ow, ow, what the hell, Max groans as he’s shoved into a chair. Please. As if you could do any real damage in your 5 foot frame to the 6 foot driver. Slamming your hands on the table for some dramatic flourish (you’re never beating the theatre kid allegations) you give the Dutchman a piece of your mind, demanding to know what his problem is, does he know how many people you’ve had to bribe this month to stop #SluttyMaxEra trending on twitter?? And yes, you know he broke up with Kelly 10 months ago but can’t he just process this healthily and go to therapy instead of having a hoe phase and hooking up with every third woman in Monaco?

Max looks insulted at this slight to his honor. He retaliates by accusing you of buying into the patriarchy and slut shaming him (-That’s not how that works but pop off king, is your deadpan response), and telling you he’s very much over Kelly, okay, it was an amicable breakup (-Sure, Verstappen, that’s why you’d only played Lana Del Ray for a whole month afterwards, huh?) and well, what’s the issue, he’s a hot and rich guy in Monaco, it’s not his fault women just want him? Would it not be #misogynistic of him to deny women the opportunity to explore their sexuality?! He smirks, pleased with his defence.

You groan, slumping down on a chair and burying your face in your hands, muffling your groan of wholesome cat dad Max comeback whennn. Max rolls his eyes at your theatrics, asking if you’d finally lost the plot.

You try cleaning up the PR messes you’ve been making, Max Emilian, you hiss furiously, remember Ibiza? Santorini? The goddamn yacht party over summer break when he got with the captain and her deputy?! (Even now, thinking of that leaking online gives you heartburn.)

Which yacht, Max says cockily, the one where he got with them one after another or at the same time?

Your jaw drops. You hadn’t even known about the threesome, so you suppose you should be grateful that wasn’t another mess to clean up. But a deeper, insecure part of you can’t help but wonder why the only woman Max doesn’t seem to want is you.

And sometimes you can’t help but wonder what it’d be like to be one of his girls, under his strong body for once instead of on the other side of his hotel wall, having to drown out the very satisfied female moans and headboard bangs with noise cancelling headphones. Like always, you push that thought down quickly.

You, good sir, are for the streets, you announce, standing up and deciding it was time to leave before your delulu, jealous thoughts decided to resurface. Seriously, you mutter under your breath, you didn’t care if his current side quest was to fuck 10 times a week, but could he at least stick to one person for a bit and not make more work for you-

Max’s hand slams the front door back closed as you started to open it. You freeze, turning back to look at him smirking down at you. You hadn’t expected him to follow you down the hallway and you gulp nervously for the safety of your job - you might have taken the roasting a bit too far.

Instead, you get a sly, Oh, so I can do whatever I want, wherever I want, just with one person?

At your awkward nod, because yes, that would significantly ease your workload, he continues, enjoying teasing his uptight, pretty manager - then were you gonna offer yourself up? After all, there’s no PR messes to find out about if it’s you, right?

You blink at Max, completely stunned by the 180 this conversation has taken. Your expression is so adorable that he couldn’t resist a you’re so cute when you’re acting all jealous, you could’ve just asked if you wanted him to fuck you, ya know?

That promptly reminds you you’re dealing with an an absolute manwhore. RIP celibacy era Max, you’ll always be famous.

Um, absolutely fucking not, keep your STDs to yourself, you hiss, flushing head to toe, and furious at the desire in you to give into the devilish proposal. He encourages you to think about it, still smirking, relaxing his grip so you can mercifully flee far away from his intense gaze. Jesus, when did he learn to rizz a girl up like that?!

You don’t take his proposal seriously at all, ignoring his cocky looks at you over meetings all week (also, he’d texted you his clean STD result to assure you he was a #SafeSexKing.) But that weekend, your refusal comes back to haunt you when you’re on a well deserved night out with your girlfriends and your PR manager senses start going off. You narrow your eyes as you spot Max in the dark corner of the nightclub, hands all over a mystery redhead. She’s not going to be a mystery much longer though - if you’d spotted them it was a matter of time before fan’s phones did and then you’d wake up to another goddamn text from your sleep paralysis demon, Henri.

You don’t even have to think about it twice. Saying goodbye to your friends, you’re at Max’s side at a very impressive speed given your 6 inch stilettos and tight sparkly minidress, and once again dragging him off by the beltloops and into an open bathroom.

He lets you yank him away, smirking when he sees you lock the door for good measure. Sweetheart, he greets. So good to see you. Finally realised you couldn’t resist me?

You practically climb him like a tree while telling him to shut the fuck up and pay attention at media training day next time, because what kind of PR crisis did he have unfolding out there? And just this once you’ll help him out, you say breathlessly in between deep kisses, but this isn’t a regular thing -

There’s not much more talking from you because he has you moaning up against the wall next, fingers buried inside your tight little pussy as he talks you through an orgasm, and then another when he splits you in half on his cock. (Once again, manwhore, who carries a condom in their jean pockets?!)

Unfortunately for your self control but very fortunately for your sex life, it is not in fact, a “one time thing”. Your trusty rose vibrator is glad for the break as you’d been taking your year long frustrations at your dry spell out on her. Especially when coming home after staying in hotels where you’d had to book out rooms neighbouring Max’s, so no one else overheard the raunchy vocals of different women every night.

Like Max said, with you, there were no more illicit PR messes to find out about in the middle of the night. You’d redirect him everytime he gave you bedroom eyes (At the pre race debrief. Post race debrief. Weekly team plan meeting. Over zoom calls? Seriously?) - gently taking his large hand and guiding him to a much more hidden, PR crisis-friendly area. To your surprise, Max actually sticks to his word and only hooks up with you - admittedly, multiple times a week (Not that you’re complaining. Turns out he was just as good in bed as he was on the track. Except this time he was definitely not finishing first...)

And for a while, everything is going well. There are no more weekly scandals scattered across trashy celeb magazines about Max. Your boss is gushing with praise, so impressed that you’ve finally managed to talk some sense into Redbull’s problem child (ah, if only she knew, but she never would, because the goddamn CIA couldn’t torture this info out of you) and best of all, you haven’t gotten a text from papparazzi rat Henri in weeks!

So of course, Max Verstappen decides that things are getting just a little bit too quiet for his liking, you had to earn your generous PR manager salary, that he paid for, right? His new, numerous tactics to stir the pot had included:

Going to clubs with no private bathrooms so you’d had to sit on his lap in the VIP lounge as he pulled your panties to the side to slide into you, barely hidden under your flimsy dress. You’d held back your moans and prayed the bass was too loud for anyone to hear

Sitting right next to you at every team dinner or business meeting so that he could sneak a large hand up your thigh and tease your pussy for fucking hours, often just as you were about to speak. And when you’re clenching the table so hard your fingers were white, he’s bending under the table to pick up a pen or something but instead left teasing licks and kisses on your aching core. You'd learnt very quickly not to wear a skirt.

Picking you up in his 2 seater Aston Martin instead of the much more appropriate discreet, spacious, 5 seater Audi he owned - so when he was too pent up after a bad practise session to wait till he got home, he'd get you to go down on him right there in the car, sometimes even as he drove, instead of parking in some hidden backstreet. It was so dirty, that he needed you so desperately that he didn't care about being caught by anyone peeking in through the half tinted windows. Because if they did look, they’d find his head thrown back in pleasure as he moans, his fingers tangled in your curls as he moved your drooling, pink lips up and down his wide cock-

Anyways, you get the picture. And he’d escalated this all the way to the paddock, which was insane because there were always multiple cameras trained on the current F1 champion. It’s the one place you two couldn’t sneak off without a very high risk of being caught, as evidenced by the one and only time he'd managed to get under your skin in the garage. He'd had you pinned up against the wall in some narrow side hallway as he whispered how fucking sexy you’d looked today, wearing his hoodie to cover up the hickies you hadn’t realized you’d woken up with and paired with some tiny denim shorts. Having the 6 foot champion huskily groan that he couldn’t focus on his free practise everytime you bent over to pet a passing dog, or when you innocently sucked on the Redbull flavoured lollipops and then the goddamn ice cream from the truck they’d brought in - was quite the power trip, you admit. So you guided his lips from your neck as he tries to add to the growing bruises on your neck and redirected him to your waiting lips instead, steamily making out as his large hands squeezed your thick ass like he’d been thinking about all day-

Max?!?

You instantly pull back from the driver and turned to see a flabbergasted looking GP - Max’s race engineer. His jaw is wide open as he looked at you two with round eyes. You’re fumbling to explain, trying and failing to push Max back - who looks rather annoyed at the intrusion and semi-glares at GP with narrow eyes. You hiss at the younger man to stop being rude and slip underneath his arms, going over to guiltily apologise to GP only to be met with You too?! How did he get you in his bed, you hated how much of a slut he was! Seriously, does he have a magical dick? Now you stare at GP in shock, unsure of how to respond to his question while Max starts laughing behind you. You make him join you as you promise to GP that he will never have to witness this again, because there will be no unprofessional behaviour of any sort on the paddock after "BootyShorts Gate" as you thereafter dub the incident. Regardless, GP still shoots you both wary glances and begins the habit of announcing his arrival and waiting 10 seconds before turning a corner in the garage, earning him many an odd look. Dramatic, really, was this where Max gets it from?

Max, of course, was very displeased with this new “professionalism” rule you'd set down - on the paddock was when he'd get the most tense, the most horny and desperate to have you underneath him, after all - and he made sure you knew it. You deliberately ignored his heated gaze on you as you interviewed him, or his lingering touches when he helped you hold your microphone up to his much taller frame, large hand wrapped around your small ones clutching the mic. Or his recent favourite, which involved standing next to you to help pick out the insta pics post-race (something he'd notoriously always hated to do) - except now, he conveniently happened to be shirtless, his toned abs and broad shoulders on display, running a hand through his sweaty tousled hair.

This last seduction tactic had sent you fleeing to Checo's garage to seek out the other Redbull driver's PR manager and beg on your knees for a client swap, surely, the sponsor benefits are legendary for whoever Max's PR manager is -

Nope. Nuh uh, no way, Checo is the breeziest driver ever to look after. The other manager pauses. Well, except for the occasional political military coup scandal in Mexico. But still, I'd take that any day over El Manwhore.

You wailed at whatever Gods had decided to curse you and took matters into your own hands, furiously plotting up social media campaign idea after idea that were exactly the kind of thing Max hated with a burning passion - hoping it would get him to back off on his tactics and wave a white flag. From viral TikTok challenges, to making him read all his cringe 2008 tweets, and even making him play fuck, marry, kill with the drivers of the grid. You'd admit, that last one had been rather funny to watch, making you chuckle as you scrolled through the comments, liking "Can't believe we got Max Verstappen saying he would fuck Lewis, kill Pierre and marry Charles before GTA 6" and "does Redbull admin know she posted this on main?!"

But despite your best efforts, it didn't seem to deter Max. If anything, he'd begrudgingly do the task and end up laughing excitedly at you - who was holding the camera - about some joke or the other and make your stupid heart flutter. You knew you definitely should not be catching feelings for your client - who'd made it very clear his interest in you was only physical. But no one needed to know that sometimes you’d log into your fake account to like the "Who got max giggling and kickin his feet and shii?" comments.

Meanwhile, Max had caught wind of your desperation for an escape attempt with Checo’s manager and had upped the ante. He slyly mentioning to Christian Horner than you were doing such a great job as his PR manager, could he pretty please have you promoted to his general manager for his non racing publicity too?

And that's how you found yourself at a Dior Sauvage photoshoot, despite your adamant protests to Horner. You were putting your Masters of Business Adminstration, first class honours, to fantastic use by babysitting a 26 year old child who liked fast cars that went vroom vroom. The only redeeming factor is that you can leave the unflattering Redbull shirt at home since this wasn't for F1 publicity and instead wear a nice outfit for once. Still, you thought it was odd that Max had so easily accepted this campaign, as he wasn't normally one to enjoy doing PR.

A few minutes later you've figured out exactly why your favourite manwhore had agreed to this campaign, because he's grinning at you while posed shirtless, toned abs and broad shoulders all on display as some pretty, busty model is draped over him. The photographer is making this even more painful for you by dragging out the shoot, making Max and the model reposition herself multiple times. You roll your eyes at the scene, because obviously they're two very attractive people who will look good together no matter what, did the photographer really need to be so extra? You stalk off at some point to make yourself a hot chocolate in the hopes it'll sooth the flames of jealousy that are threatening to consume you right now. Max approaches you when a break is called, running a teasing hand along your waist from the back and whispering you looked so fucking hot in this tight maxi dress, making you nervously look around to see if anyone noticed. Luckily, all the staff appeared busy and didn’t look in the dim corner you'd settled into to do paperwork. You hiss at him to keep your hands to yourself, Verstappen making him grin and inform you that's not what you’d said last night, in fact, you were practically begging for him to do the exact opposite-

You're glaring up at him, seriously contemplating if it’s worth breaking your contract clause to "act in the client's best interests" and mauling him with your laptop when the photographer comes up to you both with narrowed eyes. You guiltily step back, thinking he overhead Max's suggestive comments, but instead he just looks back and forth between you two contemplatively. Then, just as you were about to ask him what the issue was, he announces that you'd be replacing the model as the female for the shoot. No questions asked! he announces as you try to protest and snaps his fingers at the makeup and wardrobe artists to demand they sort you out (he gestures rather dramatically to your whole figure when he says this, making you scowl).

So that's how you find yourself dressed in a silky gold minidress with a sultry eye look, pressed up against Max's broad chest and trying not to focus on the intimate position you two are in. Max, however, has no such qualms about the position, using it to tease you further. You've been looking extra tense lately, sweetheart, he breathes, those devilish lips brushing past your ear. I know a great way to make you relax? You growl at him to shut the fuck up because oh my god, did he know how many cameras are pointed at you both right now? Besides, you mutter under your breath, it seemed like he was very interested in relaxing with that blonde model earlier.

Fighting to keep the smug look of his face, Max whispers back that there was No need to be jealous, schatje, you were the only one getting access to his magical dick. So caught up in the game you two are playing, you don't even register the photographer excitedly snapping up pictures, proclaiming that he knew it, the chemistry between these two is unbelievable!

Afterwards, as you're walking off the photoshoot, feeling all hot and bothered from Max's hands running across your exposed skin, shamelessly looking you up and down, the blonde Dutchman catches up to you. He teases you that you were going to get wrinkles at 25 if you didn't stop scowling all the time. I'm older than you, you scoff back, by a whole 6 months, in fact, so maybe you should actually listen to me for once instead of pissing me off? No problem, Max agrees, after all, he's always had a thing for MILFs. You can't help snort at his retort and then start laughing when he tries to maintain an innocent look. At least you were away from the cameras in case someone heard this, you mused.

Unfortunately, you both don't notice MonacoDaily's ratbag paparrazo, Henri, hiding in nearby shrubbery with his camera. It had been far too long without a Verstappen news scandal, he thought with a satisfied smirk as he clicked away.

And later than night, after you'd eaten the chicken stir fry he'd cooked and rewatched Cars 2 (a surpassingly more regular occurrence, these days, to unwind with him at the end of the day instead of immediately being mauled the second you stepped foot in his apartment) you made sure he followed your orders for once. Sitting him back, telling him just how bad he'd been today with all his teasing (-well, it worked, didn't it, sweetheart?) you showed him just how good you were at playing the game, too. And soon, he was breathlessly moaning underneath you as you rode him for the first time, gripping his cock like you were going to milk every last drop, teasing him with just enough pace to get him worked up but not enough to send him over the edge. And you only let him cum inside you when he begged you sweetly, making you go fuzzy at the sight of the infamous Redbull playboy being so desperate for you, and only you.

Afterwards, once you've shampooed each other's hair in the shower while gossiping about how catty that makeup artist had been, really, to imply that your pretty curls had been the problem and not her shitty styling? and Max has got you spooned against him, warm in an old hoodie of his, pressing a goodnight kiss to your forehead, you can't control the warmth blossoming in your chest any longer. And as a content sleep takes a hold of you, you can't help but wonder if Max's affections went beyond physical attraction, just like yours’ were now doing.

It turned out the opportunity to find out this answer would come the very next day, when the ding of your phone wakes you up in the early hours of the morning. It’s a very specific sound that you've set for a certain ratbag - and you get war flashbacks, hearing it now after so long. Scrambling off the bed, ignoring Max's muffled groans as you shove his heavy arm of you, you unlock your phone and gasp in horror as your suspicions are confirmed. Henri has arisen from the ashes and this time it's to deliver his sauciest scandal yet. Because a picture tells a 1000 words, sure, but he has the two of you on a goddamn video, flirting and giggling at each other as you exited the studio yesterday. There's no chance of you talking your way out of this one, as Max's large palm wanders to give your thick ass a firm squeeze as he guides you into his passenger seat. Goddamn, you knew you shouldn't have worn that tempting skims maxi dress - Max was an ass (and tits) man who couldn't be trusted to control himself in public. BTW already sold this 🥸 Henri texts. Just a courtesy FYI cuz I brought a boat with the bag from this one ✌️

You contemplate if it would be better to disappear off the face of the planet, or get plastic surgery to become unrecognisable as you chug your morning Redbull while moodily looking over the Monaco sunrise. Max joins you after a few minutes, looking extremely cute as he rubs the sleep out of his baby blue eyes and asks you what's wrong, schatje.

Taking a deep sigh (like you said, #DramaKid), you break the news. I’m going to hold your hand while I say this (- that’s really not necessary, Max interrupts) - but you know celibacy exists, right? As does having sex in a private location without the risk of being arrested for public indecency?

True, Max agrees, but what was the fun in that? Besides, you were just too hot to resist. Ignoring the butterflies at his cheesy flirting, you hold up the incriminating video on your phone as proof that it was not all fun and games, as Henri had already sold this to multiple news outlets this morning, you inform glumly. Max is strangely silent, looking intently at the video and even replaying it a few times, his eyes crinkling as a soft smile appears on his face when he hears the sound of you two laughing. Then - in a truly unbelievable redemption arc plotline from the Monaco playboy - he asks if it would be so terrible, to have this made public, to let the world know that you were together?

Well, I - you stumble over your words, - I dunno, I thought you liked that? Keeping it secret cause you just wanted a convenient hook up?

Max is silent again. Then, looking uncharacteristically nervous, he says that's not what he wants, not really, not anymore - not since he'd fallen in love with you, somewhere along the 3 months of the friends with benefits/PR manager and her problematic client situationship you’d had. And like at the very start, you don’t even need to think about it twice. This time when you shyly smile and kiss him, you make sure he can feel your love through it and know that you wanted more, too.

So you walk into work that morning, holding hands in open defiance, ready for the world to see. You’re rather confused when no one seems to be paying much attention, instead frantically trying to get the set up ready for the pre race testing. Maybe you two had not been as indiscreet as you thought and people already suspected? Or maybe you both had a penchant for drama and thought you were the main characters when you clearly were not?

You look at each other, shrug, and you give him a kiss on the cheek and tell him you’ll see him for lunch at the kebab shop on the corner, before he wanders off to the garage. Maybe Henri had a change of heart and decided not to exploit innocents for fame and money, you ponder hopefully. Maybe there truly was good in the world, after all.

And then you hear your name being called and turn to see your boss standing behind you menacingly, hands on hips. Care to explain why #MaxLovesMILFS is trending right now?

Somewhere along the Monaco waterfront, a paparazzi rat skulking in the bushes sneezes.

—————————————————————————

A/N: again thank you so much to @piastrification for inspiring this piece!! So sorry for the delay and I hope you enjoy my attempt at branching out to other fics xx tysm to you all for the requests, I am working them into my upcoming fics!! 💖

[long-live-astronerd-ghost-king]

DPXDC Prompt. Dead on main with priest Jason: Father Todd brings the Ghost King’s cult into the World of the Living.

So, when Jason dies and returns, the League of Assassins fails to hold him for long because spirits from Far Frozen pick him up after seeing teen through the Lazarus pit.

Jason quickly realizes that, well, they’re kinda obsessed with their cult of the Great One. And yeah the cult of the ruling Ghost King was very popular during the reign of the Pariah Dark but back then the rituals were carried out more out of fear. Now things are different. The population of the Ghost Zone has become interested in the activities of Frostbite and his loyal spirits because of an attempt to understand what kind of ghost the new ruler is and how best to thank and appease him. So Jason had no shortage of stories about the teenager's deeds.

~~~~

Jason to Frostbite: Well, you guys and your lil hobby are nice but I don't understand at all what's so cool about this guy, even if he defeated Pariah Dark and gets along with most of the Ancients…

Danny: *comes to visit Frostbite*, *slips and falls three times, sets the kitchen on fire in an attempt to make coffee then sheepishly smiles at Jason*.

Jason to Frostbite: ... Okay, Understandable, I Hope Danny Has a Nice Day and Some Sleep.

Tucker: Congratulations, you've acquired another Paulina. Great job. Danny: I'd rather he just asked me out instead of worshipping me. What the hell? I'm just a semi-ghost.

Tucker: Maybe things would be easier if you just gave him your phone number, you know? Danny: But he didn't ask. Tucker: Why didn't you ask? Danny: I couldn't! He's Robin himself, you know? Tucker: Well, good luck to you idiots to grow old alone near the altars of each other's name. Danny: Actually lil altar in his honor is not such a bad idea. Maybe this way he'll understand that I like him too.. Tucker: Danny, no!

~~~~

New in Gotham robbers break into Jason's place: Hey, father, God ordered you to share with your neighbors, so bring us some money or we.. Jason, who is talking on the phone with Danny: In fact, he just said that if you don't get out of here now, he will turn a blind eye to the fact that I will use my guns.

Danny*screams internally*: Oh Ancients, he's sooo cool!

Pandora: Honey, we're happy for you but stop flooding us with spam. You have already told 5 times during prayer how good his abs and chest look and how perfect Todd is when he reads aloud. We get it, okay? Clockwork: Well, I actually enjoy it. It's so much more interesting to watch while listening to the internal dialogue. Show must go on~ Danny: ...Get out of my mind! Nocturn: Thou shalt not take the name of the Lords in vain if you don't want to share with us, lil blob. So rude.

~~~Team Song: You Are My Religion · Firehouse~~~~

[jyoongim]

Based on ep 5 

ALASTOR

ALASTOR

BARKK BARK AOOOGAAA

Love a caring, defensive, sadistic, cannibilistic daddy demon

Title: Acts of service

Themes: slight submissive y/n, protective, blood, demon form, fluff, relationship dynamic, implied married couple, human life mentioned

Alastor can take a lot of shit…but even he has a breaking point….

(hehehehehehe)

Charlie’s hotel was not making the progress she wanted and so one day she shocked everyone with four words;

“My dad is coming”

The hotel was in a state of frenzy.

Everyone seemed excited to meet the King of Hell.

For once everyone was on one page and getting the place in tip top shape.

You had finally calmed Charlie down from her nth breakdown and had started primping yourself for the big man’s visit.

“Honestly its about time Luci showed his bright ass around here” you said as you patted some blush on.

Alastor was standing in the corner of your bedroom; oozing darkness menacingly.

He had been rather quiet and for once not making a fuss.

You almost smirked, whether or not he admits it

He adored Charlie 

And HATED being bested in anything.

“Youre glowering dear” you say as you finish applying your flawless makeup.

“I just dont see what all the hoopla is about. So what if the Morningstar is coming…its just charlie’s dad” Alastor grumbled in a rant.

You giggled “Yea but this is important to Charlie so no funny business mister”

His big smile tightened and his eyes narrowed “no promises”

You and Charlie greeted Lucifer

“Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!”

He damned near choked Charlie in a bear hug before turning to you

“Long time no see Sis” you hummed and gave him a big squeeze, but not before hissing lowly in his ear “do not fuck this up Luci”

He swallowed and you grinned before walking to stand by Alastor.

You nudged him towards Lucifer and reluctantly he introduced himself.

“Alastor sir pleasure to put a face to the name”

Lucifer shot you a look before eyeing Alastor suspiciously

“Uuuhh and you are?”

Alastor eye twitched “i’m the host of the hotel…you might know me from my radio broadcast hmm?”

Lucifer shrugged “nope guess thats why Charlie named it the HAZbin hotel”

You facepalmed and charlie was visibly getting nervous as you could literally see Alastor’s ego flare

“HA HA HA actually i came up with that”

“Ha Ha Ha well it wasnt very clever!”

They were in each other faces now

Alastor growled “ha ha HA fuck you”

You interjected, getting between the two, mostly Alastor

 “Boys Boys reign it in PLEASE” you threw a look at Alastor, who straightened his suit.

You sighed and turned your attention to Charlie 

“Dear why dont you tell your dad the whole point of your hotel” you gave a tense smile.

“Y/n is right dad! Alastor here has been tremendous help with the hotel…i wouldnt have made it this far without him” lucifer made a face.

You could see the wheels turning in Alastor’s head

He was up to no good.

“Yeeeeessss we are all very proud of Charlie. I am honored to fulfill any wish this lovely young lady has” 

He hugged Charlie and it took all of your willpower to not laugh at Lucifer’s annoyed look.

You giggled as he completely ignored Alastor and in turn to the others.

Charlie introduced her girlfriend and you could literally see his shoulders ease.

“OH thank Hell youre a lesbian! Cool cool i totally approve of THIS!”

Lucifer went on to give luxurious suggestions to Charlie, which Alastor shot down.

You sighed lovingly at Alastor’s antics.

He might have been the big bad Radio Demon, but he really was a softie when he wanted to be.

Definitely would have made a great dad…

You blushed at the thought.

Lucifer and Alastor were currently bickering with each other about who was the better father figure.

When suddenly the door flew open and a short, voluptuous, 1920 styled woman bursted in.

Your eyes widened “Mimzy?”

She squealed and embraced you in a tight hug, you kissed each other’s cheeks in greeting

“Ooooh y/n darling how you’ve been? Its been too long” she asked.

You grinned and gave a shrug “ooh it hasnt been that long has it?”

She greeted Alastor and gave you an astonished look “Y/n darling you still with dollface here?” you felt everyone eyes shift to you and you felt your eye twitch a bit but said nothing.

She begged to have you chat with her but you told her youll catch up her later, as you were helping Charlie and Alastor with Lucifer.

Not many people knew what your relationship with Alastor, hell not many people knew about Alastor life in general.

And you kind of liked to keep it that way but Mimzy was a talker if you ever saw one.

But Mimzy was not was one to just show up just out of nowhere…

She wanted something

You and Alaster were trailing behind Charlie as she explained the purpose of the hotel when Husker appeared to the two of you, addressing Alastor

“Boss a word with you” you quirked a brow when Alastor kindly shooed you off to have his discussion. You walked a bit aways before morphing into the wall and listened in on their conversation

“What is it?”

“You and I both know that Mimzy only pops her ass up when she needs somethin, that bitch is trouble and who knows what kind of shit she got into to come running to you”

True. 

“Dont worry so much Husker, its nothing i cant handle, besides who in their right mind would cross me?” 

“I mean…youve been gone a while and it aint like no one knows why-”

He was cut off

“And they dont need to know” that sharp smile was tight

Alastor patted Husker’s head condescendingly; like a pet.

Husker shoved his hand away angrily.

“Big talk for someone who’s also on a leash”

You saw Alastor glitch, eyes turning to black and glowing dials

Uh oh.

“What did you say?”

Your eyes widened as contract chains shot out at Husker, wrapping around his neck

Alastor was menacingly toying with the chain as he growled

“If you ever say that again i will tear your soul apart and broadcast your screams for every disrespectful wretch WHO DARES TO QUESTION ME!”

Husker was shaking like a leaf and you were stunned; Alastor rarely ever lost his composure.

When Alastor disappeared down the hall you morphed to Husker to ease his nerves

“Oh Husker are you ok?” you asked as you tried soothed his nerves.

He shook it off (not really) and grumbled “fucking asshole”

You headed back to the lobby with Husker when a loud BAM was heard.

What the fuck?

“Mimizy you skank c’mon out here!”

You see Mimzy hide behind the bar and raise a eyebrow.

You frown, going to heave her over the counter

“Mimzy care to enlighten me about what the actual fuck is that” 

She sweatdropped “i-i may or may not have borrowed some money from a loan shark”

Your frown deepened “how. Much. money?”

“O-o fifty…grand”

You hissed.

The hotel was shaking and was being heavily damaged

You pulled charlie out of the way as some debris fell from the ceiling and hissed at Lucifer “arent you gonna do something!?”

He was trying to make this a life lesson and now was NOT the time.

You growled and went to march right outside to give those goons a piece of your mind when a clawed hand settled on your shoulder.

“Dont worry dear ill handle this”

“But Alastor…”

His smile turned wild “its about time i reminded everyone why i am here…a reminder to not fuck with the Radio Demon!”

He transformed. Antlers out and black tentacles flaring.

You watch him grow big in size and rip the gangsters apart, eating a few.

You smiled wickedy, hells he was hot

After he had his fun he shrunk back to normal and you launched yourself at him

Lovingly you purred into his neck “you ok now?”

He grinned, nuzzling you “i missed blowing off some steam”

Mimzy approached the two of you and you frowned, opening your mouth to say something but Alastor beat you to it

“I think you should go Mimzy. Now”

She was shocked. Usually Alastor let her off the hook and it was you who normally told people off.

“Y-you cant be serious…”

His eyes narrowed “I mean it. You brought danger to this place just for me to clean up your mess. I wont allow that here”

He was putting his foot down. You leaned into him, happy.

You flashed her a sharp grin “i agree Mimzy, you should go”

She blinked “you backing up your hubby over ya own friend? y/n!”

She hissed at Alastor “you think i dont know you? You cant really give a shit about this place”

You crossed your arms, giving her a pointed look, hissing as you felt your eyes glow in anger “leave Mimzy. While i’m the one being nice”

She huffed and turned to leave, but not before flipping you both off.

You relaxed and turned to Alastor, who was looking smug.

Tugging on his bowtie you craned his neck to your level, purring

 “Bedroom now dear”

His ears perked and his smile grew wider “feeling big emotions doll?”

“Ooh you have no idea”

With a flick of your hand the hotel was restored and you were whisking the lanky red demon upstairs to blow off some steam of your own

….

extra:

"what y/n and Alastor are married?!"

charlie blinked "yea i thought you guys knew that"

"WHAT THE FUCK!"

[nebulaafterdark]

The Succession (Pt 5)

Summary: After the battle of Rook’s Rest, Queen Y/N is forced to rule alongside Prince Regent Aemond, in an attempt to keep her children safe and eventually seat her mother, Rhaenyra, on the throne. While attending her husband, on what appears to be his deathbed, she begins to unravel the dark truth of his near passing.

Warning: Suggestive language

Aegon Targaryen x Velaryon (Strong!Reader)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

“You do not understand,” Y/N protests. “I need to see my brother, he must be tended first. If he dies, my mother will kill me.”

“If you die, the King shall kill us.” The grand maester taps her chin. “Let’s see the damage.”

Y/N moves her hand from her shoulder. “How bad is it?”

The maester begins cutting away surrounding fabric to reveal the extent of her wound. An open, oozing gash, torn clean from one side through the another.

Alicent rushes in, “what have you done?” She demands.

“Aemond is dead.” Y/N whispers, “I killed him.”

“I meant to yourself, what have you done to yourself?” Alicent demands.

“He stabbed me, and he fell.”

“What of the dragons?”

“Baela and Moondancer are searching for Jaecerys and Vermax. Vhagar is dead, as best I can tell.”

Alicent holds a hand to her head.

“Mayhaps you might look in on my husband?” Y/N says, “tell him I am well and that I love him.”

“You expect me to lie to my injured son?”

“Only the first part would be untrue.” Y/N arches a brow.

“Drink this, your grace. For the pain.” The maester presents her a black vile, milk of the poppy. “We’re going to pack the wound.”

Y/N’s eyes widen, “why?”

“I fear the blade must’ve twisted, your grace. The area has been gouged clean. There is not enough flesh for a stitch to hold.”

“Seven hells,” Y/N grimaces, chugging it down.

Even milk of the poppy does little to dull the pain as they begin pressing against the wound. Her screams can be heard echoing the Red Keep for less than a minute, before she faints.

————————————————————————-

“And now I need you to wake, sister.” A voice says, reaching Y/N in her dreamless sleep.

“Jace, she needs time.”

“There is no time.”

Y/N groans, willing her eyes to open.

Jacaerys pats the side of her face, “there you are.”

“You’re alive?” Y/N croaks out, blinking at him in the dim light.

“As are you.” Her brother says, simply, “at present Daemon’s army is marching on us from Harrenhal and mother is on her way for the throne.”

“That is no matter,” Y/N says, “we were only ever holding it for her.”

Baela looks to her betrothed.

“Sister,” he takes her hand, “what is expected of our mother now…to truly seize power, you understand what it would cost?”

“Aegon is in no state to bend the knee, I’m sure if I could speak with her-”

“I fear there may be no chance, if you, yourself, do not provide a show of strength.”

“Helaena has Dreamfyre and I have Stormborn, my children’s dragons are small. Sunfyre is gone.” Y/N reminds them.

“You’ve Vermax and Moondancer.”

Y/N looks to her brother.

“We will stand with you.” Baela assures her.

“Against our mother, you will stand with me?”

“Surely you have not done this for a crown, which would’ve been yours in time. You have done it for Aegon.” Jace sighs, “he is an idiot, but from what I understand, he loves and cares for you.”

“He does,” Y/N nods.

“He has been in talks with our mother for some time, attempting to make terms. That is why he lies injured.” Jace tells her, “his raven did not arrive in time and Rhaenys thought it an attack levied against her. Still I do not wish for his head.”

“Do you think she would do it?” Y/N wonders, “kill him in front of me?”

“You have not seen her these past weeks, since Luce’s death, I cannot say what she’ll do.” Jace loves his mother, fiercely, but he loves his sister too.

“We can anticipate even less of my father’s movements,” Baela admits. “He’s not returned to Dragonstone in nearly as long.”

“I hope to resolve this peacefully.”

“I do not believe our mother thirsts for Aegon’s blood, this is merely a precaution.” Jacaerys tells her. “You must dress, prepare the dragons and the King’s Guard, we do not have much time.”

“We will also raise the smallfolk, they will stand with us.” Y/N says, crying out as she sits upright. “And Aemond’s body, make sure it’s found. I plan to make a gift of it to our mother.”

Jacaerys nods, taking Baela’s hand and setting off to their tasks.

Chérie comes to dress her, pulling out the red dress Rhaenyra gifted her daughter as a symbol of solidarity on the day of Lucerys’ petition. A show of force against the Hightowers, even as she stood beside them.

Y/N shakes her head. “Bring me the green dress.”

Chérie swallows hard, “at once, your grace.”

The green dress is arguably the most beautiful gown she owns. A gold hand embroidered tapestry over emerald green satin. A wedding gift from Aegon. She’s never worn it, save for his rooms upon request, or to have it fitted after the births of their children. This day she stands for her husband and his house. This day she wears Hightower green.

She passes her husband’s apartments on her way to the throne room, turning the knob with familiarity. “Where are the children?”

Aegon looks to her, “in with the maids, shrouded by guards, my darling. I’ve just had the wounds dressed, I did not want them to see.”

Y/N nods, “of course.”

“You are a sight for sore eyes,” Aegon smiles.

Y/N shifts between feet. “Thank you, my love. I am headed to the throne room to meet with my mother and discuss terms of the succession.”

Aegon holds a hand out to her, “come.”

Y/N closes the distance between them, lacing their fingers together as she stands at the side of his bed.

“If her only want is my head, let her have it.”

“What?” Y/N reels back, “no.”

“Hush now and listen,” he insists. “My body is broken, the maesters say I will never be whole. You will be free to remarry-”

“Stop it.”

“A fitting father for our children.” Aegon continues, “so long as I live, I will only stand in your way.”

“No,” Y/N tears her hand away from him, “you’re wrong.”

“I say this out of love,” he insists.

“No harm will come to you. Those are my terms, I present my mother with the throne, and the body of the man who killed her child. I offer her the peace I have made and all the good with it. It is nonnegotiable.”

“It needn’t be this way,” Aegon tells her.

“You’re mine, Aegon.” Y/N insists, “my husband, my confidant, my dearest friend. You are still all of those things to me, however many times I need say it, however many years it takes for you to believe me, I have time. We have time.”

Aegon sighs, “I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve you.”

“A punishment for something, surely.” Y/N lets out a laugh.

Aegon shakes his head, “a gift from the gods.”

Y/N presses a quick kiss to his lips. “I’ll be back.”

“I will be here.”

Y/N closes the doors to her husband’s chambers behind her. “Stay with my husband.” She orders Cole, waiting to collect her in the hallway.

“Your grace, I am needed at your side.” He says.

“No, you will stay here and defend my fucking husband as though your life depends on it, and best believe it does.”

————————————————————————

Rhaenyra meets Daemon along the gates of the Red Keep. The streets are lined with smallfolk and the occasional yellow cloak, clearing a path for them.

Aegon the fourth begins to fuss in his grandsire’s arms.

“I’ll take him,” Rhaenyra offers. The babe quiets almost instantly.

“He well and truly does not like me.”

Rhaenyra only laughs. “It happens that way sometimes, I’m afraid. Though it may help if you smile.”

Daemon scoffs.

The line of bystanders continues down to the throne room, where Jacaerys and Baela stand on either side of Y/N, at the iron throne.

“This is quite the battalion you’ve assembled, daughter.” Rhaenyra remarks, “do you plan to challenge my claim?”

“Not in the least,” Y/N assures her. “I should like nothing more than to see you sit this throne. But I do have terms of my own.”

“Let’s hear them.”

“First and foremost, the guaranteed safety of Aegon and our children.”

“And what of Aemond?” Rhaenyra wonders.

“Bring him,” Y/N says, to the guards.

Daemon watches as a large black sack is carted in and laid at Rhaenyra’s feet.

“I slain him myself, with the help of my brother and his betrothed.” Y/N tells them, “you may see for yourself. Though I must warn you, he fell from the sky. The sight is not a pretty one.”

Daemon is the one to tear back the fabric and confirm that it is, in fact Aemond. Nodding to his wife.

“What other terms do you have?” Rhaenyra asks.

“Alicent, Helaena and her children.” Y/N swallows, “I wish for their safety as well.”

Rhaenyra pauses, as if to consider.

“You should also know that these guards and the smallfolk which line our halls are here for me. In my name, for my claim, not Aegon’s. The White Hart appeared for me; they follow me.”

“And who do you serve?”

“You, mother. Same as I always have.”

“You will bend the knee?” Rhaenyra purses her lips.

“Now, if it pleases you.” Y/N assures her, “so long as my terms are met.”

Rhaenyra nods, “very well. I should like to be crowned in the dragon pit, where I will reaffirm your title as my heir.”

Y/N takes a deep breath as she rises, approaching her mother and taking Aegon IV in her arms. “Thank you, my Queen.”

“Mother.” Rhaenyra corrects her, gently.

————————————————————————

Over the next weeks, Aegon grows tired of lying about. His unlikely budding friendship with Lord Larys seems to be the culprit.

Y/N is halfway to Aegon’s bedchamber when she hears his pained cries. Rushing in to find him collapsed on the floor.

“I can’t, I can’t.” Aegon protests as the grand maester attempts to bring him upright.

“I am so sorry, your grace.” Orwyle apologizes.

“Leave him.” Y/N shoos him away, “leave him.”

“Your grace,” the maester sighs, allowing Aegon to rest against the floor, “I must get him back to bed.”

“I will do it.” Y/N shakes her head.

“My Princess, surely with your injuries you cannot.”

“If I should need your assistance I will call upon you, Grand Maester. At present, I require a quiet word with my husband.”

The maester nods, “yes, your grace.”

Y/N waits until the doors close behind him to address her husband. “Aegon, I know how dearly you desire to walk again. But it has been but a moon turn since you arrived here in such a state they could not say if you would live. You must remain abed.”

“You did not marry a crippled man.” Aegon bites out, bitterly. “I did not father children as a crippled man.”

“You did not marry me with one arm that may never rise above my head or a scar across my face.” Y/N reminds him.

“My cock is ruined, did I tell you that?” Aegon laments, “it is burnt and disgusting, they do not believe it will rise.”

Y/N sighs, lying down at his side, “allow me to worry about that.”

“It is not you.” Aegon explains, “my love, I cannot bear to look upon my own reflection. I do not know the man staring back at me.”

“I hear your words, husband. You are entitled to this grief. But you needn’t punish yourself for it, nor face it alone. We will fight this battle together, as man and wife.”

“It is difficult for me, allowing you to see me in this state of disrepair, I am…they tell me I will never be whole.”

“My heart aches for you,” Y/N tells him, “but I do not pity you. I believe in you.”

Aegon nods, “you’ve no idea how much it pleases me to hear you say this.”

“You are different, I will not deny this. But different needn’t always be a bad thing. However different our circumstances, I can appreciate the distaste for one’s own reflection. I have felt it most my life, I do not look the part of a Targaryen Princess.”

Aegon exhales, looking to his wife. “You are devastatingly beautiful, the fact that you cannot see it is a tragedy all its own.”

“I love this body because you are in it, not the other way round. When you are no longer in pain, we’re going to train your cock, like a dragon to heel.” Y/N points a finger toward it. “Dohaeris, Rȳbās,” serve, obey.

“Ow, fuck,” Aegon protests clutching his side as he laughs.

Y/N covers her mouth to stop her own outburst.

By the time the Grand Maester rushes in, they are curled up on the floor, cackling like animals and holding their wounds. “Your graces!”

Aegon mutters to his wife, some form of gibberish, only she seems to understand.

Nodding as she chokes out, “lykiri.” Be calm. Sending them into such a state the Grand Maester simply excuses himself, without another word.

“Is everything alright?” Alicent asks, standing with a hand to her heart just beyond the door.

He smiles, “the road ahead is long and painful, but his grace laughs. He has joy.”

“And Y/N?” Alicent wonders, “how is she?”

“The wound is clean but slow to heal.”

“Is the arm lost to her?” Will it move?

“There will be pain, but it moves even now.” He rests a hand on Alicent’s shoulder, “better days in due time, your grace.”

Series Taglist: @oh-you-mean-me @barnes70stark @lovelyteenagebeard @niyahnotnia @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @callsignwidow @hyde-jpg @novelswithariana @klutzylaena @ynbutbetter @ravenqueen27 @danart501 @woodlandwrites @saraiadg @tempo-rary-fix @lxdyred @supernaturalstilinski @httpvomitello @dd122004dd @shadowrose13-blog1 @dracaryxzs @magictrump @vee-mage @mrs-starkgaryen @labellapeaky @multifandom-loser @minttea07 @blackdiamond2317 @baybaybear1 @tea-effect @heavenly1927 @sabyreads @champomiel @8812-342

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

can I possibly ask for a Lucifer x gn!reader drabble where it’s super fluffy and cuddly?

Like maybe they just woke up from Lucifer’s alarm and he turns it off and instead of getting up to start his work as king of hell he turns back over and just hugs y/n closer to him and she tries to tell him that he has to get up then fails

I’m bad at requests (this is my first one 🤧) but I hope that’s a good amount of information :))

A/N — I LOVE THIS IDEA. It's so sweet 😭💖 sorry it's so short, I hope it's good regardless!

As always, my requests are open and since as of 5/22/24, I reached 50 followers, I will be doing a writing spree for Hazbin and Helluva requests. Refer to this post for more information (if you're interested). I've since reached 55 fantastic followers! <3

Mornings In | Lucifer x Gn!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, procrastination (guilty!)

Word Count: 346

Summary: With your partner being the literal King of Hell, he had duties he had to attend to. That didn't mean he wanted to, especially when the bed was so warm and you were right there.

Peaceful quiet.

It was unheard of in a realm like Hell.

The only sounds in the room were two different breathing patterns and the occasional rustling of the sheets as one of you adjusted in the temporarily unconscious state. 

Even in sleep, you could smell Lucifer's sweet scent that enveloped you like a warm hug, influencing your dreams of a future filled with nothing but love. 

Though soon enough, the peaceful quiet was interrupted violently by the sound of Lucifer's alarm going off. 

Between the sound of ducks mixed with a circus song, you were quick to wake up. 

Before you could pull yourself from the warmth of the shared bed to start on your morning routine, the alarm stopped abruptly and you felt Lucifer's arms wrap around you, pulling you into him with his head resting atop yours. 

“Luci, Honey, you have to get up.” You said into his chest, sighing contently at the feeling of his arms tightening around you. 

“No.” He whined, burying his face in your hair. “Don't wanna.” 

You laugh lightly and kiss his shoulder. “You're the King of Hell, and as much as I would love to lay in bed with you all morning, you have a realm to rule. There's that meeting with Asmodeus—”

“Mentally canceled. Now hush and cuddle me, dammit.” 

You laid in silence for a solid minute before thinking of what to say next. He was being stubborn, but you love that about him. 

Defeated, you nestled into his hold, wrapping your arms around him in return. 

“What about the other meetings?” You whispered, listening to his heartbeat. 

“I'll reschedule. ‘M spending the day with my love.” He pulled you closer, as if it were possible, and wrapped his wings around you to act as an even softer blanket. 

You hummed in reply, unable to form words as tiredness overcame you once more. 

Just before you fell back asleep in your lover's arms, you caught the words he whispered into the silence: “I love you.”

And you knew that you loved him too. More than anything. 

[klintoris]

Jschlatt x Fem!Reader Smut

When I started streaming, I never thought it would get me to where I am today. That's how everyone thinks, no one truly fathoms the huge increase in followers when collaborating with a huge streamer. 

For me it was Jschlatt. 

-

“YOU LITTLE FUCKING SHIT”  Schlatt screamed over the call after I just murdered him in Minecraft again, stealing all of his things. “My bad” I cackle over the line, “toots’ you are so fucking lucky you live in another state” he threatens, “fuck does that mean???? Are you threatening me, big man?? I will clobber you.”, I hold my streaming camera and stare directly into it. there's a small silence before he speaks up, “Don't, don't look at me like that”, “Like what?” still making direct eye contact with the camera, “I’m-”. I cut him off “Anyway, while you weren't looking I blew up your dog.” I pull away from the camera. 

Eventually after multiple matches of bickering, I grabbed my suitcase and made my way to the airport. 

-

Schlatt was streaming, as planned. Ted was visiting and knew about my drop-in. 

I pull up to the house in the Uber, getting anxious I look at my phone, I have the stream pulled up to see what the boys are up to. I get out, and standing near the door I message Ted that I am here, I watch as he tells Schlatt he's going to the bathroom. Soon Ted comes and lets me in. “ok so, I'm going to go back up and in like 5-10 minutes come into the room”, I nod, setting my suitcase near the door, along with my bag. Ted closes the door behind me and walks up the stairs, I follow him up through the hallway near the door of Schlatts streaming room. Ted walks in and closes the door behind him, assuming to keep jambo and soup out. Contemplating my entrance, the 10-minute mark hits and I open the door without my body in the doorway, schlatt and Ted both turn slowly to look at the door open. I walk into the doorway, as schlatt sees me and he turns to Ted speechless, “No fucking way”. he gets out of his chair, flinging it to the floor and throwing his hands on his head. “Hey, monkey man!!” I gloat and open my arms for a hug, “no no no how did you get here,” he says, obviously joking. “A plane, how else,” I say bringing my arms down, “aren't you excited??” I look at him, and he sighs “Only a little” he cracks a small smile. 

-

“Alrighty big man, I gotta head out,” I say after we've been streaming for over 3-4 hours.

“What? Where are you going??” he questions me after ending the stream, I stretch “To my hotel?” I question his antics, “why not stay here? Why waste the money?” he says to me as he stares at my exhausted state.  “Schlatt you don't have a spare room, ted isn't even staying here” I stare at him in confusion glancing at Ted, “Sleepover!” Ted says from the hallway as he prepares to leave for his hotel. Schlatt looks at Ted and then me raising his eyebrows, “You're funny schlatt but where the hell would I sleep?” I cross my arms looking down at Schlatt in his rolly chair, “I have a bed, I can sleep on the floor like a gentleman”, “That's silly I wouldn't make you sleep on the floor in your own house.” I stare closely trying to see his reaction. “Well” he pauses for a second, I can hear Ted stop moving to listen intently, “we could always share a bed, it's a king so we have our own postal codes almost” he grins leaning back with his hands behind his head. I internally scream, I find Schlatt very attractive but to sleep in the same bed would probably kill me. I stare, thinking,  if I ever have a chance it would be now, “finnee” I cave. “there that's my girl!” he squeals like a little school girl, almost making me forget what he said. “Alrighty kids'm off” Ted speaking up from the doorway in a sing-songy voice pulls me away from my thoughts. “awwhh bye Uncle Ted,” I say hugging him, Schlatt gets up from his chair and says his goodbyes and looks at me “Okay where’ your bags?” schlatt turns to me, the doors shut downstairs as ted leaves, “by the door but I can get them its fine”. “Alright if you insist on lugging a suitcase up the stairs, knowing you it's probably heavy too, be my guest.” I sigh, “Fine, Mr. Schlatt, could you please carry my bags up to your room for me pretty please” I blink rapidly looking up at the tall man with my hands clasped as I swayed, “perhaps.”.

-

Crawling into the bed after doing all of my nightly routines, it's rather fucking cold. I shiver as I regret the choice of clothing, shorts and a t-shirt, only if I knew schlatt kept his room at arctic level cold. “Everything alright toots’?” he looks at me, realizing he's wearing the grey sweatpants girls fawn over, I groan “Nothin’”, he shrugs and climbs under the covers far away from me. I shiver as my teeth start to clatter, almost nothing is helping, not even Schlatts thick blankets. “You sure you’re alright?” he asks from across the bed,  “Why is it so cold in here?” he chuckles as I feel the bed shift, as the bed creaks I feel schlatt pull me up against him, “there you can be warm now,” he says sliding a hand around my waist. Almost on cue, a shiver ran up my spine and my ass pushed into his dick, I froze in position after hearing him grunt. “what was that?” he says in a low voice, “not a clue” I manage to let out trying to sound as if I don't have a massive lady boner right now.

I try to shift to get comfortable, along with try not to push into him again, I graze his cock again. He holds my hips, “If you keep doing that I swear” Wanting to push his limit I speak out without thinking, “You will do what?”, there's a pause before I grind intentionally this time against him. He groans, he slides his hand from my hips to lower, his hand above my pussy, I breathe heavily anticipating his next move. He glides his hand down again cupping my clothed heat, I breathe in, sucking all the air in my lungs. Schlatt puts his head in the crook of my neck, he proceeds to start kissing and nipping at my neck slowly as he starts to practically massage my clothed pussy. I moan out, still lying on my side I turn to face schlatt, staring at him I look at his lips as he does the same. We pull each other into a heated kiss. He moves his hand from in between my thighs and gets on top of me. He lays in between my thighs, grabbing at my chest as his big hands roam around my body almost claiming it. I groan into the kiss as I feel his cock grind up against my covered pussy, schlatt notices this and grinds into me more, still gripping my chest.

He moves his lips from mine to my neck again, his mutton chops tickling at my neck as he sucks and bites at my sensitive area. “Fuck schlatt, please” I plead, not even sure of what I'm asking for.

“What is it princess?” he pulls away from my neck to look at me, “you want me to fuck that pussy of yours? Hm?” he taunts almost pouting at my state. Nodding eagerly he speaks up, “Use your words, what happened to that loud mouth of yours?”, “Please, please fuck, fuck me schlatt”. “That's it” he bellows as leans back as he practically rips my shorts down my legs, seeing the wet spot on my pink lace panties he teases me, not just with his words but his finger, grazing the spot as he says “she’s practically drooling for me, huh toots’”. I try to squirm away from him toying with my bud, but he grabs my hips and slowly hooks his finger on my panties pulling the skimpy article to the side leaning down and giving it a long lick.

He pulls away licking his lips, “She tastes almost as pretty as she looks” I moan in response, wanting to beg again he pulls his shirt over his head. I revel in the patch of chest hair before looking at his hands pulling his sweats off, I inhale sharply before he leans back down to kiss me, taking my shirt off during the kiss he breaks to look at my tits. “Fuck princess why were you hiding these from me”, schlatt starts to lick and suck at my right nipple while kneading the other tit, attempting to give them equal attention. At this point, I love the foreplay, though, the anticipation is killing me. I whine at the contact, “Please schlatt” I beckon pulling at his hair, he pulls away from my tits, “Fine fine”. Schlatt pulls back, taking my panties off he throws them somewhere behind him, attempting to close my legs he slaps them open. Schlatt takes his boxers off, and as his cock hits his stomach, the fear of god strikes me. It would be assumed schlatt would have a huge dick but I feel like ill be the next Mr. Hands. Schlatt resumes his position in between my thighs, moving his hands from beside my waist to guide his cock to my entrance, teasing it slowly before sticking the tip in. “shit, you're already so tight”, I moan a little in pain at the expected stretch, eager for him to put all of his cock in I buck my hips, he grabs my hips, almost enough to bruise them.

“M’ tryin' to hold back toots’ you aren't helping my case” he grumbles, “What if I do not want you to hold back?” I say not even thinking, he looks back and forth between both of my eyes for a second before shoving his whole cock in. I gasp at the stretch, and he begins to thrust at a normal pace, “f fuck schlatt” I suck in through my teeth before throwing my head back, “more please” I bring my head back looking at him. He's so focused on my reactions to him that he doesn't comprehend what I say until he pulls all the way back out and slams back in, his balls hitting the back of my ass hard.

“Holy shit,” he says before grabbing at my hips, leaning back on his feet he uses the fat from my hips to yank my body back onto his cock. “Oh my god”, I say clawing at his hands holding my hips, “he can't help you right now princess” he states after chuckling and then groaning. Schlatt slaps at my tits before grabbing at my neck, now using it as leverage along with my hip still, slamming me onto his cock.

As he pounds into me he makes eye contact with me before reaching down to my clit with the hand that was on my neck, rubbing at the bundle of nerves I go to throw my head back.

“Don't you fucking dare, I want you to look at me when you cum on my cock with that pretty pussy” he says through gritted teeth. I whimper at his words feeling white hot pleasure start to build up, “please please please please” I beg, “come on pretty girl let it out” as he fucks the spot in me that many have had trouble finding. “I'm, ah” I cum, and I cum hard, “That's it, that's my girl”, but he still keeps going. Not stopping. “Schlatt” I manage to get out between moans, “I'm not done with you yet”, flipping me onto my stomach he lifts my hips as he pushes himself back in. “oh my fucking-” I get cut off when he starts slamming into me again, slapping my ass roughly he holds the fat on my hips again, leaving bruises. “She takes me so well princess” I whine, starting to drool from over-stimulation before he yanks my head by my hair pulling me flush against his body.

He grabs my waist, and snakes a hand down back to my clit, “schlatt I can't, I can't”, “Yes you fucking can”, I clench on his cock as my second orgasm builds up. “F- fuck” he moans out, “cum with me pretty girl”. I moan at his words as I feel his cock twitch in me, clenching down I cum and fall against the bed. He whimpers noises I never thought I'd hear from his mouth, “Take all of it, good girl, gon’ fill you up s’ nice”, I feel him paint my walls white as he slows to a hilt. He pulls out as liquid gushes out of my abused hole, “gotta get you cleaned toots’” he says out of breath. 

this is my first post AHHHHH!!! let me know if you guys enjoy and if you want more!!

[alexwilltellyouthings]

Ok I have so many thoughts about painland ending up canon or not and I. Just.

Listen I AGREE that their bond goes beyond being romantic or not. It's obvious, it's beautiful, I love it and I love them and their friendship and I truly do think it is important that media has this kind of relationship portrayed.

But.

But.

I would be lying if I said I wouldn't be disappointed if it doesn't turn romantic. It involves a lot of things.

1: I want Edwin to have that. He'll still be happy without it, yes, but god can't he have that? He's been through so much. He had a speedrun through his sexuality issues and confessed in hell. Like wtf. Can't he have that???

2. Bisexual Charles would actually be so important to me. And yeah he can be bi and not in love with Edwin but come on lol. The thing is, there's not many bi men in media. Even less bi men figuring out their bisexuality. Even less bi men figuring out their sexuality when they were raised in the 80s and knowing their best friend is in love. Do you see how many layers exist here? How amazing his story could be? Charles has so much we still don't know about him. And yes, I would like that one of those things could be something I relate to. Besides trauma. Call me selfish. And like he's so bisexual coded it would be offensive for him to be straight I'm sorry.

3. They exist in other universes. Let them be platonic there. Let them be romantic this one time.

4. I know falling in love with a straight person is a very common story and I don't think it's wrong for it to happen in a show, but honestly, it's not what I sign up for when I'm watching queer stuff. Think Our Flag Means Death. It probably changed my brain chemistry because anything less than that gets really hard to swallow. I know, we all have queerbaiting trauma, and I know this wouldn't be the case, and it never claimed to be something as queer as OFMD. But I got so attached that... Well, I wouldn't stop watching if this happens, but it wouldn't sit well with me. It's a bitter feeling, you know?

5. They didn't have anything be explicit, but come on, they did set us up. Charles got jealous at Monty, and only Monty, for that matter. I wouldn't say his thing with the Cat King is necessarily jealousy, more like protectiveness, but that can be disputable. And both George and Jayden said more than once that Charles' response to the confession let things open. So I mean if that door wasn't closed, then please don't close it now! The road until things happen can be long, dramatic, tortuous, whatever, there's many ways to tell a love story. But if I'm sitting for it, then I don't want to get shot in the face later on (unless it's for plot reasons which ok).

6. Have I mentioned that bisexual Charles

Anyway I feel kinda bad for wishing so much they get romantic because I see and agree with the whole platonic discourse. But yeah those are all the reasons why I can't stop myself. Have a good day everyone

[base0h]

Yo I got this idea from your pickle fic you did a couple months ago.

Monster trio,law and kidd super gluing a pickle jar and ask their s/o to open it and to their surprise their s/o opens it without any problems

I love your crack fics so much

Please and ty

a/n - I’m so glad you like my humor because sometimes I feel like I’m so unfunny 😂💜 oml kidd would break the jar (also I can’t fit all of the characters so I had to omit Sanji 😭😭)

Warnings ⚠️ - I bully Kidd, crack, g/n reader

- Bro thought that maybe he could troll you back since he couldn’t open the pickle jar a couple days ago (he’s still depressed, so no one talks about it) y’all just pretend it never happened

- zoro: hah! Remember that time when you couldn’t open the-

- everyone: SHUT THE FUCK UP.

- luffy: huh?

- poor zoro 💀 he didn’t know he wasn’t supposed to talk about it since they left him at the previous island

- He was all tightening the pickle jar with the glue, giggling and kicking his feet just imagining you not being able to open it like him, so you’d be embarrassed like him. (He’s evil, beware)

- he skipped over to you and handed you a pickle jar, “Hey y/n, can you open it for me while I go grab something to eat?”

- you nodded, grabbing the pickle jar and opening it with ease. Huh, that’s weird, why would Luffy ask you to open it?

- he had such a big mischievous grin when he came back and then when he saw the pickle jar sitting next to you, the cap right next to it, oml he freaked out

- “HUH? HOW DID YOU OPEN IT-?!”

- “What do you mean? It was super loose.”

- ….

- nah he’s dead now watch him go sob in the corner

- man was sobbing for about an hour or two before Sanji was able to feed him some meat to make him stop crying. Has ptsd with pickle jars now- and you felt bad so you gave him a jar for him to open (you could’ve opened it but you wanted to make him feel tough and strong 💜💜)

- “Luffy, I just can’t open this thing, can you open it?”

- The way his eyes lit up and he just RAN to help you, “MHM! Sure!”

- opened it without a problem and puffed his chest out, crossing his arms, “Shishishi~ I’m strong!!!!”

- “You’re the strongest captain ever! King of the pirates! Roger wishes he was you!!!” -you

- He was giggling, flexing his muscles and all lmfao

- man Luffy is lucky to have you as his personal best cheerleader 💜💜😭

- oh nah, the prank you did on him did not end well 💀 man literally blew up and poor killer had to just sit there in the midst of his explosion (his mental health was harmed in the process of this)

- things chilled out after you managed to give him a hug and some cuddles and coaching him through calming breaths (he does yoga to relax you can’t convince me otherwise)

- Kidd the yogi 💀💀💀

- So he decided that it’d be absolutely hilarious to do the same pickle jar prank on you bec he’s an asshole and a dumbass

- Idk how he did it, but he spent all night formulating and researching which glue was the best until he just decided to weld it shut

- “Kidd what are you doing?” -killer

- “Go to bed killer.”

- stfu Kidd don’t be mean to your best friend 💀

- fast forward to the time of the prank, he handed you the jar with a literal shit eating grin on his face, bro could not stop giggling (sounds like a fucking clown. And I don’t mean in a good way.)

- “Why are you giggling..?” -you

- “No reason >:)”

- You opened it, continuing to watch your show on the tv, handing it back to him. There was a moment of silence that lasted about 5 minutes. He was not moving, blinking, nor breathing for that matter. Killer walked by the room, and took a picture before walking away 💀

- man just started yelling outta nowhere, scaring the literal shit out of you

- “WHAT THE FUCKING HELL?!” -Kidd

- “WHAT THE FUCK KIDD?!” -you

- “HOW DID YOU FUCKING OPEN IT?”

- “IT WAS FUCKING LOOSE.”

- “WHAT DO YOU MEAN I WELDED THE FUCKIN THING SHUT!”

- “…..”

- “Why the fuck did you weld it shut you dumbass?” -you

- he beat you up (correction) you beat him up for even trying to beat you up

- he didn’t seem that affected by your prank earlier but trust me, he’s crying on the inside, praying to corazon and asking: why tf am I so fucking weak

- after you told him it was just a joke he was pretty mad and ignored you for about a day (before he just couldn’t ignore the love of his life anymore😂)

- but yeah lesson learned, don’t do it again

- well he thought it’d be funny to do it to you since it made him so irritated (he will not admit that and will tell you that Bepo made him do it or something like that)

- the hardest part for him was asking you for help because anytime he does you get all smirky and say: “ooooo you need my help??? 😏”

- “never mind I don’t.”

- “NO- IM SORRY ILL HELP!”

- so yeah he was a bit nervous about asking you- but he had to do it lmao

- “Y/n-ya, can you open this for me?”

- “Sure.”

- you literally opened it in seconds, you didn’t even struggle.

what the fuck?

- “Y/n. How did you open that?..”

- “It was loose, did you loosen it?”

- “…….I’m gonna go to bed now.”

- “it’s 2pm!”

- “I’m. Going. To. Bed.”

- went straight to his computer to look up

- “Is my s/o a demon?”

- “what is the strength level for opening glued shut pickle jar”

- “911 marine hq”

- “counseling hotline”

- “can glue expire?”

- “am I weak?”

- Zoro was still pretty mad that he couldn’t open the jar last time, so he’s added, “opening pickle jars for y/n, 20 reps, 2 sets, give pickles to Luffy.”

- his workout page looks like a Barbie notebook you cannot tell me otherwise

- everything is pink and neon green 💀

- anyway, mayyyyybe Luffy convinced him to do the same prank on you because Luffy kept laughing at him about it, poor moss head’s self esteem was a bit low now 😭

- So he grabbed a jar, glued the damn thing shut and went over to you (took a while because he could not find you)

- “hey y/n. Can you open this for me? I’m gonna go train.”

- “Sure.”

- he hid behind the corner, watching as you took the jar and paused, continuing to read your book before opening it with ease, putting it back on the table next to you

- man was flabbergasted.

- how the actual fuck did you do that?????

- “Zoro??? What do you want me to do with the jar?!” -you

- His plan to hide out behind the corner was ruined the moment Luffy came over and fucking said hello to him

- “Oh hey zoro!! Whatcha doin?”

- “SHUT UP!”

- “huh?”

- You turned around to see Zoro trying to shut up poor Luffy who literally wanted to just say hi 😭

- “Zoro what are you doing?? I opened the jar, is it for Sanji’s meal?”

- “….Yeah just- give it to him.”

- he looked sad, it was painful for your heart

- imagine getting stabbed, then reading something sad, listening to sad music, and then realizing. You’re sad.

- that is what this felt like

- you tried your best to comfort him (even though you didn’t know why he was sad) so you watched him train and you sat on his back while he did pushups. Seemed to make the poor guy feel better, but you still didn’t know why he was so sad in the first place :’)

a/n - poor zoro

[littlestardescendants]

So yalls were curious how Munira would interact with her Potential Half Demon Sibling so I decided to write another long ass essay for yalls to get into it.

(Warning it may get a touch dark but let's go!!!)

First is Sathara:

How Munira Takes the News: Now to preface this, yall should remember Mirjami and Satan probably were super affectionate and loving to each other so hearing the news makes Munira timid or scared that Satan won't want her when her little sister is born (Which we all know Satan would be there to assure her, I imagine he's the most affectionate/present dad she's had in a long time). However after this she takes the news pretty well and is excited to be a big sister, I imagine she helps Mirjami with everything or constantly asks the other nobles/Satan how she can be a good sister and the whole process runs smoothly. When Sathara is born, I imagine those warm feelings get exacerbated as she's so happy to have a little sister. They just immediately bond.

Their Childhood: And come childhood, Sathara and Munira would be very close. Sathara is probably the more emotional/reactive sister but she looks up to Munira and is always attached to her constantly being like "My sister!!" Whenever anyone gets near her. Sathara is like her dad she just loves hard and is so passionate about it. Of course they're sisters they're gonna have their squabbles but Munira looks out and protects Sathara from everything. Honestly Sathara probably thinks Munira can scare the Angels because of it.

Upbringing and Adulthood: Of course as they grow up I imagine they stay close. Sathara is the first person Munira tells about her asexuality and Sathara safeguards that secret to the grave even fighting with Satan if he tries to inquire about it (Because I mean on one hand he doesn't like Munira's suitors but on the other the 'No sex' thing freaks him out because he doesn't want her dying. They get to an arrangement eventually but Sathara was hissy about it the whole time). Munira is Sathara's rock. She loves her sister immensely and Sathara is at the point where her Wrath can be worse than Satan's if Munira is hurt. All around the girls got each other's backs no matter what.

Ranking their Closeness: Out of 5 blue circles I'd have to rank them: 🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵🟡🟡🟡 - This many out of 5.

They're just super close and always best friends. Like tbh they got the unbreakable sister bond and I imagine it makes Mirjami and Satan thrilled because their kids are happy. Even if Gehenna's chaos took a bit getting used to.

Next is Munira and Maymum:

How Munira Takes the News: Now for Maymum, it was a bit different. Munira was already won over by Mammon spoiling her but when she finds out Mirjami is pregnant she's scared. It's sort of the same fear, she thinks Mammon would prefer her younger Sibling over her but as we know Mammon wouldn't be like that too much. Once she's assured she is very supportive of Mirjami constantly wanting to help her and when Mirjami stresses about the pregnancy and has difficulty carrying Maymum, she's the one to help ground her mother, giving her the strength to carry to term and do everything she can so her new brother is brought into the world. It works and Munira is so proud to hold him after.

Their Childhood: So growing up, Munira and Maymum were fiercely close, I imagine Maymum was a very fragile baby but Munira took alot of care and helped with raising him and as they grew Maymum became attached to her, following her around or always following her move good or ill. Both were spoiled but I imagine Maymum was greedy for his sister's time and only calmed down when she made him that bear, a toy he'd carry everywhere to feel close. The two were just best friends with Maymum always looking up to her.

Upbringing and Adulthood: Of course, as they grow up, the closeness is still there but I imagine Munira had to set boundaries because Maymum was just always wanting to be with her, never time for herself. It took them a bit to get it down as Maymum was terrified of loss in any way but the two are still very attached and Munira gets very audibly pissed whenever she hears anyone take advantage of Maymum. Especially since he's still a bit naive on reading between the lines.

Ranking their Closeness: Out of 5 they'd have gotten a well meaning- 🔵🔵🔵🔵🔴 - They're close I imagine the only issue is Maymum's overattachment but all around they just get along.

Now is Livya (Warning it gets a touch dark from here)

How Munira Takes the News: So I'm not gonna mince words. The only way Mirjami would get pregnant with Leviathan's child is if he cornered, coerced, and baby trapped her and now stuck with him, Munira would see Mirjami's mental state isn't great. Mirjami would sort of withdraw as a mother and it'd leave Munira in the care of Hades Demons and Leviathan which she Dislikes so throughout the pregnancy Munira is helping Mirjami but also begging for her mother to come back. It doesn't get easier however as Mirjami has postpartum depression and sort of detaches from life sort of just going through the motions and sitting there leaving Munira to raise her new sister.

Their Childhood: Now in childhood it gets harder for Munira; Mirjami is still depressed and sort of gave up on life just staring out the window, Leviathan gets jealous of any time Munira spends with Livya and Munira has taken the role as "mother" for her as Livya grows up aware that Mirjami doesn't want her. It's very difficult as I imagine Leviathan raised Livya mostly and before long Livya also becomes depressed because in a way she knows she's unwanted, and is so desperate for Mirjami's attention, she accidentally almost drowns in her bathtub desperate for attention. Munira saves her but this is sort of the mark that shows how much Livya needs her and Leviathan eventually allows them to be close since Livya almost died for her mother's attention.

Upbringing and Adulthood: Following this incident, it doesn't get easier. Mirjami either dies from strangulation or just continues to withdraw and in that time Munira raises Livya, their closeness becoming a dependence as Munira cannot live her life without Livya with her and Livya's mental state is still very fragile, the girl often scratching her face or breaking her horns out of anxiety and unhappiness. She feels so much Envy and it's suffocating as she envies Munira but also doesn't want to lose her and being raised by Leviathan and following his perfect footsteps makes her constantly insecure and anxious of herself, only able to calm down being with Munira. It's sort of like the cycle gets repeated with the two: Leviathan ensnared Mirjami and Livya ensnared Munira, there is no escape from this codependence.

Ranking their Closeness: Out of 5 circles they get a: 🔵🔵🔵🔵🔵🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡🟡 - But the yellow isn't like Munira and Sathara. The two are enmeshed together, Munira is so protective and had to grow up fast for Livya and Livya is heavily dependent on Munira to survive. There is no life without the other.

Next we got Baal:

How Munira Takes the News: Now just gonna preface this one with the fact that after knowing Beel a bit Munira doesn't like him; She thinks he's weird and his smelling Mirjami freaks her out so hearing Mirjami is pregnant with his son she's confused while her mother would do that. She still supports Mirjami but I imagine when Beelzebub wanders off or leaves and checks in she gets progressively irritated the 5 yr old snapping at him as she tries to take over the role of caring for Mirjami with him so in and out.

Their Childhood: Now with Baal born Munira promised to take care of him but it's hard to do so because he's hyperactive playful and gets her in trouble, Munira taking the role to help Mirjami with him even with the difficulty. The resentment for Beel festers but Munira is really considered the "good child" always doing good and making things right while Baal is the "wild child" often running around and getting in trouble. Their Childhood is filled with Baal getting in trouble while Munira gets him out of it and it doesn't get easier.

Upbringing and Adulthood: Now growing up the two grow up very different. Munira is the person who's responsible with good grades and a set plan while Baal grows up wandering like his father with no care in the world except for Munira and Mirjami but that's it. Both actually bond on their resentment to Beel and it becomes a sort of dynamic where Munira is constantly criticizing Baal for his lax life while Baal hates that Munira is always a "hard ass" for his lifestyle. The two live very separately but are also close where it counts. It's just their lifestyles are different.

Ranking their Closeness: To rank their Closeness, I'd have to say they're a: 🔵🔵🔵🔴🔴 - Not exactly close but they're not too bad. I see them as the most neutral since it's hard for Munira to get close since Baal is so irresponsible and carefree. Different energies honestly.

And lastly Noctiel

How Munira Takes the News: Now I've always read the dynamic as Mirjami being more in love with Lucifer than he is with her. Not to be mean just how I've always seen it but for Munira I imagine she was scared of Lucifer so finding out Mirjami was pregnant made her scared. She tried to support her mother but it was difficult as whenever Lucifer walked into the room she squealed and hid from him which made the pregnancy interesting. I think Munira didn't mind the news but was nervous through it all and for good reason since a child between a human and an angel like Lucifer would probably too intense. Even with Gamigin reviving her I don't see Mirjami able to survive having Noctiel. So Munira gets a brother but loses her mother.

Their Childhood: Following Mirjami's passing and Noctiel's birth I can't help but see their Childhood as nothing short of tragic. Munira is devastated to lose her mother, in grief and I imagine Lucifer is just disillusioned making Noctiel's childhood very lonely. I imagine he attaches himself to Munira but Munira is in grief and homesick. She now lost her mother permanently and wants to go back to the Human world with her father while resenting Noctiel partly for stealing her mother away. Their Childhood is pretty much spent with Noctiel desperately wanting to know about Mirjami and be close with Munira and her wanting him to stay away while mourning and missing her life in the human world. She's the last human descendant of Solomon and both just have a very lonely existence.

Upbringing and Adulthood: Growing up it gets easier but is still not the same, Munira stops blaming Noctiel for their mother's death and realizes she needs to be there but struggles because Noctiel grows up with no place. He's not heaven, hell, nor human and he feels like a Nothing. I imagine Lucifer had disassociated but his care for his children sort of helps them as Noctiel just isn't sure of his place and for a long time Munira is spending her time helping him since she realizes Mirjami would want her to help her Sibling and not be attached. They both are still learning to be close after years of isolation and misplaced emotions.

Ranking their Closeness: Unfortunately their Closeness is a low; 🔵🔴🔴🔴🔴 - They're just not there. They spent years where Munira isolated and pushed Noctiel away and now as adults they'll try but I imagine it's hard because Noctiel still feels out of place or like he belongs nowhere. Munira's support helps ground him but honestly they're a long way from feeling like a family

Anyways there we go any questions lemme know!

[stvolanis]

BIRTHDAY BOY

(one shot)

PAIRINGS: Elvis Presley x wife! Reader

WARNINGS: tooth rotting fluff! Not proofread, clingy reader, no use of y/n, slight angst (Elvis thinks reader forgot his birthday), surprise party, kissing, pet names, the Memphis mafia been goofballs

NSFW WARNINGS: p in v sex, oral (m receiving), slight ball play ig?, light choking, hair pulling, daddy kink (duhh), cream pie, breeding kink, lingerie

sorry if I missed anything!! And happy birthday to the king of rock n’ roll<3

˚ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ˚

The entire day you and Elvis’ Memphis mafia have been planning is birthday party. His dad even started helping out.

It was going to be spectacular. You’d ordered a large 5 layered cake with buttercream frosting and strawberries, and written on top in cursive was ‘long live the king’ with a little 25 under it.

The house was decorated in head to toe with gold and white streamers, balloons, confetti, and any other kind of decor you could imagine fit for the king of rock n’ roll.

Elvis Presley had been gone for a week, taking on an acting gig in Florida, Miami. You missed him dearly, but you knew he was coming home today. Every time he called one of the house phones who would always chat your ear off on how much he wanted to see you. You’d think he had separation anxiety (he does).

The warmth of his voice on the line brought endless smiles to your face, and his amazing voice made giggles erupt from your throat. Everything about him shined, inside and out. He was beautiful, and a very charismatic man.

He had a certain feel about him. In a way where everyone would stop what they were doing just to catch a glimpse of him. He could hold an entire rooms attention and keep it, and sometimes he didn’t even realize it. People looked at him as if he were a god, and hell, maybe he was.

Elvis was a giving man. If you knew him, then you’d know that he shined so bright, he made the people around him shine, too. And to Elvis, you shined the most. He adored you. Every little thing about you was imperfectly perfect to him in just the right ways.

Elvis was a good husband, despite what people in the press have said. He takes care of you more than he takes care of himself, and he does it with a smile on his face and love in his heart that he only holds for you.

Elvis always told you that you were his angel. You were sent by the heavens to watch over him, guide him and love him for all he is after his mother died. You healed him and changed a broken, distraught man into the brightest star.

But you knew it was the other way around.

You found each other in a hopeless state, but together you overcame it and helped each other. Elvis was always kind to you, even if you two had petty little arguments, he’d always make it up to you by showering you in kisses with little ‘I’m sorrys’. How could you not forgive him when he was the sweetest man you’d ever met?

He remembered every anniversary. Every birthday. Every Valentine’s Day. He showered you in gifts, attention, dates, and never shut up about you in the press. You were sure interviews were sick and tired of him ranting on about how ‘good of a wife’ you are like a lovesick puppy, but it filled you with butterflies knowing he held you in such high regards.

Elvis was your person, and you were his. You’d known that since the day you met, and the day he popped the big question on a Thursday night in Hawaii confirmed it. It’s been bliss since you’d known him, and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

But now, you sat nervously on the couch, biting down on your manicured nails nervously.

You hadn’t answered any of the 4 times Elvis has called you, and you knew he’d be worried by now. It was his birthday, and you felt bad because you didn’t want to upset him—but the surprise will be all worth it.

You wore his favorite outfit. A light blue, low cut dress that ended mid thigh, paired with black marry janes and white socks that sat a few inches below your knees. You also wore a white pearl necklace that acted as a light choker, and to top it all off, a silver chain sat secured gracefully on your neck that read ‘E.P’. A beautiful necklace your lover gifted to you for your 2nd anniversary.

But you wore a secret under your pretty little dress that Elvis would surely adore later tonight.

“Everyone, I just got word that Elvis is down the road, get in your places!” Gunner, a mutual friend of you and Elvis, shouted. You quickly took your place around the corner from the door, so you could be the first person he sees when he walks through the large entrance.

The lights were turned off and the room was silent as you heard booming footsteps come up the familiar stairs of Gracelands’ entrance.

You sucked in a breath of air as the door swung open, and you could already feel his suffocating presence in the house.

“Baby?! Where ya at?!” He yelled out, his voice laced with concern as he began to move towards the stairs, assuming you were in your shared bedroom. You giggled a little, and Elvis’ head snapped to your direction. You’d been caught.

“Surprise! Happy birthday, honey!” You yelled out, along with everyone else. Elvis let out a breath of air he’d been holding in for what felt like all day. No matter how many times he’s left home, weeks on end, you’d never gone not one day without calling him and tellin’ him all about your boring day without him around.

He drug a hand down his face with a groan, followed by a deep chuckle as your body collided with his in a tight hug. He kissed the top of your head, and finally, you’d felt his arms around you again. And it’s was as if all of his love visibly seeped into you.

“Was so worried, satin. Thought somethin’ bad happened to ya.” He huffed out with furrowed brows. You laughed as you cupped his face in your dainty hands. “Nothin’ bad happened, Elvis. Just wanted to give you a lil surprise is all.” You muttered as you brought his face down to your level, giving him the tenderest of kisses.

You tasted like vanilla on his tongue, mixed with cherry from the cherry lollipop you always had in your mouth. Elvis wasn’t sure how you hadn’t gotten a cavity from it yet. Your hair smelled like fresh rose water, and he knew it was from your annual bath-soakings full of the best rose petals money can buy and scented bath bombs.

You were warm against him, your small body molding and fitting perfectly against him. He loved you. God, did he love you. His baby. His love. His wife. The woman he plans to bear his children. He couldn’t get enough of you

“I got you a cake, Elvis.” You smiled up at him. You were the cutest thing he’d ever seen. Your smile was contagious to him, as he felt a grin spread across his face. “Yeah, lemme see it, baby.” He said.

You clapped your hands together, exited to see his reaction of the large cake, decorated to perfection. You took his large hand in yours and dragged him to where everyone else was in the dining room. On the table sat the cake, and Elvis felt his eyes widen at the mere heigh of it.

“Woah, that’s a lot of sugar, honey.” He chuckled out as he walked closer to take a good look. “Look at the top, El.” You urged. Like a good husband, he obliged and a chuckle rumbled in his chest.

“I love it, baby.” He said as he walked over and tightly hugged you, slightly lifting you off the ground in the process. “I’m glad! I hoped you would.” You said happily.

He didn’t have a chance to respond before the Memphis mafia swept him away from you. “Sharing is caring!” They yelled with loud boyish chuckles as they went to the pool room. Elvis mounted an ‘im sorry’, to which you merely giggled.

All throughout the night Elvis was occupied with his family and friends celebrating. You knew you shouldn’t, but you had to admit that you felt kind of neglected. In more ways than one.

He’d looked so unbelievably handsome all night, and you couldn’t help but become all hot and bothered as the night continued. You watched him play pool with his friends, his arms were exposed and fit. Elvis was no muscle maniac, but he had just the right amount for your mouth to start watering like a bitch in heat at the sight.

You finally built up enough courage to speak up about it as you walked over to where he stood in all his glory. His back was now facing you as you lightly gripped his arm to grab his attention, making him spin around to look at you.

“What’s wrong, baby?” He asked, his accent thick. You grew shy as his friends grazed in on the interaction, being nosy. You chewed on the bottom of your lip, and Elvis understood as he slightly leaned down is you could whisper into his ear. “M horny, Elvis.” You muttered, barely just loud enough for him to hear.

Elvis lightly hummed. “S that right?” He asked, and you nodded in confirmation. “Alright, don’t worry, sugar, I’ll take care of ya.” He stated.

“I’m done for the night, fellas.” He said as he tangled his fingers with yours, pulling you away from the group of men. They whistled knowingly, followed by a few hollers, making your cheeks flush red and bury yourself in Elvis’ side. He chuckled as his arm wrapped around you, walking up the stairs to your shared room.

He opened the door for you and flicked the lamp light on. “I got another surprise for you.” You muttered, shy under his gaze. He peered down at you. “Yeah? What is it, baby?” He asked, his breathing heavy.

You began to slide your dress off of your shoulders, below your breasts and down your hips before letting it fall to the floor beneath you. Elvis’ mouth watered at the sight and he felt his pants tighten uncomfortably, his slacks suddenly becoming too tight in his crotch area.

There you stood, in a baby pink lingerie set. Floral and lacy, nipples and pussy barely covered by flimsy fabric. Your thighs covered in garters with little pink flowers embroidered onto them delicately. What made Elvis go over the edge though, is when you turned around to show him your perky ass.

In cursive, sat nice and pretty was ‘Elvis Presley’.

He felt like he could cum in his pants right then and there.

“D-do you like it?” You asked, nervous at his silence. He scoffed. “Like it? Baby, i fuckin’ love it.” He said, spinning your around to face him before sliding his hands past your waist, down to your ass, tightly squeezing both of your ass cheeks.

You bit your lip as you looked up at him. “Yeah?” You whispered as his leaned down. “Fuck yes.” He muttered before his lips crashed down onto yours in a heated kiss.

It was sloppy as your tongues tangled with each other, you fighting for some kind of dominance that you knew Elvis wouldn’t allow. You sucked his bottom lip into your mouth, making him groan, biting your lip in retaliation. His hands squeezing the fat of your ass tighter, gripping you impossibly closer to him.

“Let me make you feel good, Elvis.” You breathed out against his lips. He merely clicked his tongue. “Hm?” He asked again. Your legs rubbed together, slick coating both of your inner thighs.

“Please let me make you feel good, daddy.” You repeated, more desperately this time. He groaned in satisfaction. “Good girl, go ahead, baby.” He urged.

You dropped to your knees and watched as he unbuttoned his pants, letting them drop to the floor. You licked your lips at the sight of his leaking cock, standing hard and ready for you in any way you can take him. He was long and girthy, balls hung, seemingly painfully full. Your core ached to relieve him.

You licked around his tip before licking his slit that leaked slaty pre-cum, and his hiss was enough for you to suck his tip into your mouth. “Fuck!” He yelped out as you sucked harshly, before taking him deeper into your mouth.

You bobbed your head up and down, your hands reaching to fondle his aching balls. If there was one thing you knew how to do, it was giving mind blowing, other worldly head. Your little mouth drove Elvis beyond crazy, wether it be for talking shit or having his cock in it.

His eyes rolled to the back of his head as you effortlessly deep throated his cock, and you felt him throb in your mouth. You gagged around him, making him throw his head back and let out a desperate moan.

“Yess, fuck! Just like that, honey. Suckin’ your husbands cock so well. Takin’ such good care of me.” He breathed out. You knew he was about to cum as his fingers found their way in your large hair, gripping tightly. “M gonna cum, baby. Shit.” He moaned out.

Your mouth moved to suck one of his balls into your mouth and your hand moved quickly to stroke his needy cock. Your hand moved fast, your fist tight around him. It was all too much, the way your mouth sucked his balls in like a vacuum and your hand stroking his hand at a quickening pace.

His cum spurted from his cock, and your mouth shot up just in time to get it in your mouth. You sucked his tip, milking him of all the cum he had stored away in his heavy balls. “Holy fuck, you’re so fuckin’ good, soso good f’me.” He said, mouth hung agape as you released his tip with a loud ‘pop’.

You opened your mouth, sticking your tongue out to show him the cum that rested on your tongue. He licked his lips and felt his cock harden again. “Swallow.” He said. And like the good little wife you are, you listened..

“Good girl. Now, getcha’ lil ass on the bed n’ bend over f’daddy.” He said as he helped you to your feet, slapping your ass playfully as you passed by him to the bed, making you giggle.

You bent over, legs spread enough so he could see the thin string covering your pussy that was now a darker shade of pink from your juices. “Look at you, all nice n pretty. All this for me, sweetheart?” He asked as he slipped the thin string to the side.

You nodded your head feverishly. “Yes, daddy. M’only wet f’you.” You muttered as you teased your ass into the air, pushing it towards him. He swatted your asses harshly, once, twice, before he lined himself to your entrance.

He teased his tip into you, making you groan. “Please, please, please—“ you chanted like it was a prayer. His hand snapped to your hair, leaning your head back. “You take what I give you, wife.” He muttered as he tenderly kissed your forehead.

“Yes, daddy, m’sorry.” You muttered out, gasping as you felt his cock enter you without warning. His tip kissed your cervix, and your mouth hung open, throat going dry. “Shit, so tight. Grippin’ my cock so good.” He huffed out.

“E-Elvis!” You whimpered out, the sting making your eyes water. His heart ached at the sound of you in any kind of pain. He peppered sweet kisses along your spine and on your shoulders in reassurance. “S okay, m’ gon’ take care of ya, don’t worry.” He whispered into your hair as he kissed your head.

Your stomach felt like it was doing summer salts and butterflies exploding in it all at once. You loved him more than words could ever describe and nothing in the world would ever change the way he made you feel, even 5 years deep into marriage, he still makes you fall in love with him all over again.

A wave of pleasure consumed you as you felt him re-enter you, picking up his pace at pounding into your throbbing cunt. “Elvis! Fuck! Just like that!” You moaned out.

Every time his hips slammed into yours, you released little ‘ahs’. The sound was like music to his ears. Knowing he was making you feel good, made him feel at least 20x better. If there was one thing he took pride in, it was pleasing his woman in every way he could.

“Gonna fill this lil pussy, you want that? Hm? Want me to fill you with my babies?” He asked, his hands gripped your hips. “Yes, yes, please! Need your cum in me, daddy!” You groaned.

He pulled out of you, flipping you around before re-entering you. “Wanna see you when we cum, yeah? Gon’ see ya beautiful fuckin’ face, honey.” He moaned out as he leaned down to press a kiss to your lips.

He was pussy drunken and his mind was fuzzy as your walls squeezed him in a vice grip. He didn’t know how much longer he would last. “Daddy! M’gonna cum, fuck m’gonna cum!” Your voice high pitched, and your head thrown back. Elvis brought his hand up to your neck, squeezing your throat just enough to make you see stars when it was paired with his piercing cock.

“Need you.” You whimpered out, grabbing at his free hand. A thing you did that Elvis thought was the cutest thing, and adored so much, was that every time you came on his cock, you made sure to hold his hand. It comforted you and Elvis loved it as he reached his high. “I’m right here, satin. Gon’ fill this cunt.” He said, biting his lip.

“Oh!” You moaned out as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, covering Elvis’ lower abdomen in your vile juices just as he painted the inside of your walls white with his seed.

He fucked you through your orgasm, and you could feel each time his cock spurted out a new round of cum inside of you. His balls tightening as your sweet pussy milked him, and all he could think about was how nice and round you’ll be with his babies. The perfect wife.

Your hand reached up to lovingly cup his face, leaning up to press a sweet kiss to his bitten lips.

“Happy birthday, baby.”

˚ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ˚

don’t be shy, ask to be a part of the tag list and request things!!

tag list: @elvisalltheway101 @epthedream69 @claire-elvisgirl @elvisrealgf @littlehoneyposts

[ggukkieland]

📕BTS Fic Reads - 2022 July - Oct

I’ve been getting messages about my reading lists (because I haven’t been posting monthly and I really don’t have any excuse for not posting for four months lol). Though most of these have been reblogged, commented on, mentioned, etc. and that anybody can just check my archive and tags for the fics, I compiled them all in this list for easy reference (I refer to these lists too 😊). I also notice that it is easier to find fics when they are logged/documented somewhere and when described or properly tagged in the post. I hope this will help readers and potential readers find the fics they like.

💌 Again, these are not mine and we have all these authors to thank -  I really appreciate all of you. I may not get to reach all of you but I hope this can serve as a multiplier and reach other readers to discover your gift of stories and for them to find their favorites  💌

Note: if link doesn’t work, click on author link and go to their masterlist

🥕 Ongoing - most recent chapter [as of date this list was posted]

🥕 Completed - drabbles | one shots | series

🥕 S - smut | F - fluff | A - angst

Mostly Mature, 18+ only please

I read different members, different genres so please take note of the tags, description per fic

Don’t forget to reblog/comment on author’s work, too 😊

No AO3 Fic Recs because I have a more organized system on ao3 and putting it here will take time 😭 sorry.

[around 120 fics] I should really go back to posting per month to avoid this buildup

🥕 [Ongoing Series]

↬ Namjoon

And They Were Roommates @joonsrack​ - two shot [1/2] | 8.4k+ | roommate!taehyung who suddenly left for the summer and had his room rented by Namjoon, strangers to lovers, temporary roommate!Namjoon, unrequited love (OC to Taehyung), unrequited (namjoon to OC), namjoon is so endearing (but destructive lol), humor | f, a

↬ Seokjin

The A-Listers @httpknjoon - drabble series [3/?] | 4.3k+ | actor!seokjin x famous!reader, crack/humor, actors au, rumored relationship but kind of a mystery/guessing game if they are together or not (fun!) | f

To Kill a King @foxymoxynoona - series [7/?] | 100k+ |  historical fantasy, political themes, royalty au, Prince!Seokjin | a, s, f

↬ Yoongi

Control @hxseok-honee - series [00/09] | teaser/background | demon king!yoongi, blind!reader, twin brother!hoseok, royalty au, supernatural | a, f In which a hidden princess, much to her twin brother’s dismay, concocts the most unimaginable of plots for the sake of escaping her world of pain and suffering. OR a demon king meets his maker and learns that the one person who can see right through him is a girl who can’t see at all. | a

Match Made in Hell @ughcore - series [7/?] | 23k+ | enemies to lovers (rivals), arranged marriage, doctor!yoongi, unrequited? (it begins as a mystery what their past was) | a, f

Twirl for Me @gimmethatagustd - series [3/?] | 19k | stripper au, single dad!yoongi, a bit of Jungkook, ballet instructor!reader (yoongi’s daughter takes ballet classes), secret identity (i guess?), strangers to lovers | s, a

↬ Jimin

Doctor Dreamy @jungblue - series [2/?] | 15.7k+ |  exes au, ex!jimin becomes sperm donor, expecting parents | s, f, a

Rumor Has It @jananakookie - series [5/?] | 29k+ | college au, fake dating, “infamous” OC due to bad rumors, Jimin recently broke up and proposed the fake dating | a, f, s

↬ Taehyung

All of our Lifetimes @bangtan-madi​ - series [9/15] + interludes | 34k+ | boyfriend!Taehyung, husband!Taehyung reincarnation au, lovers to strangers and to lovers again, established relationship, implied soulmate au, kind of crime au, “After all these eons, all these lifetimes, is it possible to find each other again—even when neither of you awakens with your memories?” | f, a

Magic Shop @seokjiniwithluv - series [2/?] | 3.4k+ | club singer!taehyung, daughter of rich CEO arranged to marry CEO!Jimin, enemies to lovers | a, f

Stars Above @crystaljins - drabble series [4/?] | 9.4k | Alien!Taehyung, roommate au (intergalactic exchange program 😁)

Temptation @j-ungkooky - series? [1/?] | 3.1k | CEO!Taehyung, Office AU, Secretary/Assistant!Reader, sexy + humor, intimidating taehyung but he’s actually sweet, he crouched under her desk to hide from someone but this made everything so darn hot 🥵 (no smut yet) | s, future a

Toxic @jeonsjiddies - series [4/?] | 7k+ | stalker!taehyung, hacker!taehyung (using it to stalk and manipulate OC), coworker au | a

↬ Jungkook

All I Want @sxtaep - series [5/?] | 36.9k+ | bestfriend au, fuckboy!jungkook, nerd!reader, FWB au | s, a, f

Bedeviled @writemywaytoyourheart - series [2/?] | 9.1k+ | enemies to lovers, demon!jungkook, human!reader making deals with the devil - gets accompanied by jungkook to the underworld | a, f

Carved @haliiimede - series [3/?] | 39k+ | demon!jungkook x angel!reader, urban fantasy, dystopian au, enemies to lovers | s, a with Taehyung drabble Dominus

Colour Me In @taegularities - series [5/?] | 71.4k+ |  fwb au, fake dating au, artist!jungkook, college au, rich au (oc/reader) | s, f, a

Free Use @littlemisskookie - series [6/?] | 13.6k | fwb au, unrequited crush (oc to taehyung), bdsm, childhood friends/neighbor, college au, “Your long time crush agrees to be your dom.” | s, f

Hurtin Me @lookingforluna - drabble series [1/?] | 570 words | ex-FWB, fuckboy!jungkook, roommate au, friends to lovers? | a, s

Idol Jungkook Headcanon @magicshopaholic - series (of one shots but can be read standalone) [4/?] | 42k+ | idol!jungkook, staff!OC (named Lia), strangers to lovers, bad dates, idiots to lovers, eventual dating | f, s  The Fifth / Part 2 The Sixth Honey

In Your Eyes @prodgguk - series [00/?] | 1.3k+ (teaser) | widow!reader, detective!jungkook x doctor!reader, past: yoongi x reader (but he passed away) | a, f

Little Baby Bear 2.0 @xddaengx - two shot [1/2] | 5.4k | hybrid!jungkook (he’s a bear hybrid and he’s so cute 🥺), , ex-boyfriend!hoseok who originally owns jungkook but dumped him onto OC, hybrid!taehyung (tiger), hurt/comfort, beginning might be confusing so I read the original version too | a, f

Long Way Home @sparklingchim - drabble series [24/?] | 40k+ |  single dad!jungkook, bestfriend!reader, unrequited love, idiots to lovers, feat. Jimin as OC’s fwb | a, f, s

Maniac @strawbearytae - two shot [1/2] | 3.3k+ | exes au, mutual pining, mutual break up, but not kind of ignoring each other, got assigned for a project/Music Festival | a (so far)

Milestones @valorkook - series [00/?] | 900+ | hospital au, doctor!jungkook, nurse!reader, tsundere!jungkook, enemies to lovers | f, a

↬ OT7/Multi

Double Trouble @bangtanstanst​ & @jooneos - Jungkook x Reader | Christian Yu x Reader

series [3/?] | 59k+ | tattoo artist!jungkook, tattoo artist!christian yu, flower shop staff!reader, roommate au (jk x oc), friends to lovers, bet/dare au (JK bet he’d be better than CY), some jealousy involved | s, a, f  

🌷So I read this years ago and I wasn’t that aware of Christian Yu but then this fic blew my mind and I’m so into this pairing/love triangle/poly relationship even though I still don’t follow CY that much at present time. This is just crazy hot. It doesn’t help that there’s this post years ago predicting that Jungkook’s future state is Christian Yu (tattooed, hot but cool).

Office Hours @softiegguk​ - OT7 x Reader

series [2/7] | 12.2k+ | office bangtan, office au, bts x finance manager!reader, pwp, coworkers au, staff accountant!jungkook, admin assistant!taehyung, project manager yoongi (coming soon), business analyst jimin (coming soon), sales representative hoseok (soon), executive assistant!seokjin (soon), CEO!Namjoon (soon) | s

↬ Themed Series

The Nanny Diaries @btsgotjams27​ - OT7 (individual drabble series)  bts themed series, single mom!reader, accidental nanny!bangtan, humor | f

namjoon | au: neighbors ➥ the reluctant nanny (tba)

jin | au: friends ➥ the accidental nanny

yoongi | au: housemates➥ the i-had-no-choice nanny

hoseok ~ ?

jimin | au: co-workers

taehyung ~ ?

jungkook | au: strangers to friends➥ the unexpected nanny➥ the blind date➥ the weekend trip

🥕 [Completed Fics/Series]

I Love You @ughseoks - drabble } 1.8k | slice of life, strangers to lovers, established relationship, boyfriend to husband, expecting parents au, tooth-rotting fluff, snippets of important moments with Namjoon | f (i love this! I still cry thinking about this drabble)

The Interpretation of Dreams @ppersonna - one shot | 13.8k | PhD Mentor Namjoon, Post-grad, OC/Reader crushing on Namjoon | s, f

Fool Me Once, Fool Me Twice @dalamjisung​ - series [3/3] | 11.9k | unrequited au (oc to namjoon), best friend jisoo went after namjoon too, self-discovery fic (for OC), more on OC and her relationship with Jisoo and discovering her true friends/true self | a, f

Lost in the Funhouse @dovechim - one shot | 9.7k | thriller, prisoner!namjoon, asylum, psych patient, psychological, criminal au, psychiatrist!reader | s

Mission @dreamscript - one shot | 3.2k | spy au, team leader!namjoon, established relationship, coworker, action (slight),  hurt/comfort (oc comforts him when he felt he messed up leading a mission and OC got hurt) | f

Sail @sunshinejoon​ - drabble | 1.6k | strangers to lovers, idol!namjoon, staff!reader, eventual established relationship, boyfriend au, tattooed!reader (which Namjoon got curious of), hurt and comfort too | f

Show me How @imaginationofacrazyfangirl​ - one shot | 3.9k | virgin!reader who decided to hook up through tinder, dating app, strangers to lovers, not sure if this is ongoing but it ended with a vibe that it has a continuation(?) | s

Straps & Chokers @joonsrack - drabble | 2.1k | CEO!Namjoon x Assistant!reader, boss-employee relationship (reader finds him stressful at work), BDSM Club, Meeting your boss in a BDSM club is probably the last thing you were expecting coming here. | s (nothing graphic but very mature themes)

The Body Through Time @yeoldontknow​ - one shot | 10.9k | exes au, falling out/break up, post-grad, professor!namjoon, OC offered graduate assistant position (Art History Dept) and needs Namjoon’s signature but he’s still hurt 🥺| a, s, f

The Wedding Arrangement @sugaurora​ - one shot | 44k | enemies to lovers, turned FWB, neighbor au, medical/health professional (physician’s associate!reader), construction contractor!namjoon, wedding au (seokjin’s), unrequited love (oc to seokjin) | a, f, s

Til Death Do Us Part @justimajin​ - series [11/11] | 49.2k | arranged marriage, enemies to lovers, assassin au/agent au, heirs, action, themes of revenge, some minor ☠️| a, f, s

All an Act @tteokggukk​ - one shot | 10.6k | acting major seokjin and oc/reader, enemies to lovers, college au, humor | f, implied s

Timelines @doyouknowbts - series [8/8] | 27.1k | soulmate au, time travel au/teleporting, time slip, doctor!seokjin, journalist!reader | a, f

Amour Propre  Blind Spot @randombtsprincessa​ - two shot [2/2] | 8.9k | idol!yoongi, break up au | a, f

Bubbles @dreamcatcherjiah​ - SMAU | neighbor au, mutual pining, producer!yoongi x writer!reader, parenting au (they are the usual babysitters of their neighbor’s baby Yoonji), something happened to to Yoonji’s Dad and they got appointed to be the guardians | f, a

The Couples Package @pars-ley​ - one shot | 2k | friends to lovers, fake dating au, vacation au, asked yoongi to join for the couples trip but there is couples therapy in the package (that ended up being too real) | a, f

Dawning Revelation @artaefact​ - drabble | 522 words | police au, supernatural, detective!yoongi, devil!reader | a

Fixer Upper @gukyi - drabble 1.5k | established relationship, slice of life, humor, tooth-rotting fluff, yoongi keeps asking you to fix things in your new apartment, and it’s getting ridiculous.| f

Post-prank Smutty Drabble @btsqualityy​ - drabble | 500 words | pwp, husband!yoongi, just filthy, based on a request “...continuation of a smut drabble of YG and mama min of that bad prank that she pulled on Yoongi” | s

Recompense @vminity21​ - drabble | 2.9k | college au, used to be childhood friends but grew apart after OC moved away, kind of enemies to lovers (just bickering), tsundere!yoongi, themes of grief, hurt/comfort | a, f

The Art Critic @mooniyooni​ - drabble | >1k | established relationship, husband!yoongi, dad!yoongi, parenting (yoongi babysitting the babies)  Idolverse, tooth-rotting fluff | f

The Devil Skates on Thin Ice @vankoya - series [3/3] | 60.3k | slow burn, exes, figure skater!reader, hockey player!tyoongi, enemies to lovers, college au, sports au, falling out +  mutual pining (so I guess this makes it idiots to lovers too), we discover their history and I love the slow burn, a fandom classic really | a, f

Vows aka 10 ways to win your husband's heart @hamsterclaw​ - two shot + drabbles | 28k+ | arranged marriage, enemies to lovers, sort of fwb too, rich au, heartwarming really I just like this Yoongi, bratty!reader (and oh I wanna tag him as the doting husband), Yoongi was dating someone when he was “forced” to marry OC, OC tried to atone for the times she embarrassed Yoongi, seriously one of my favorite OTPs | f, s

Catch Your Death @dovechim - one shot | 5.1k | hybrid au, arranged marriage, proof of consummation, snow leopard!hoseok, general!hoseok, princess!reader, royalty | s

Checkmate @sunshinejoon - drabble | 743 words | fuckboy!hoseok, unaffected OC (in the beginning), I guess playing with hearts, this was supposed to have a continuation (but this is the last) | a

Feral @lovesickjoon - one shot | 4.1k | best friend au, unrequited love, werewolf!hoseok, supernatural, pwp | s

Head Over Heels to Hell @jimlingss - one shot | 27.5k | soulmate au, reincarnation au, enemies to lovers, college (in the present time) to post-college, childhood friends/acquaintance (present time), star-crossed lovers (past lives), past lives themes of: war, historical, thievery, pregnancy, an amazing PLOT TWIST, humor #holygrailfics | a, f

Make a Move @alpacaparkaseok​ - one shot | 4.6k | humor, tooth-rotting fluff, roommate au, strangers to lovers, mistaken identity (OC thought roommate Hobi is a girl) | f

Simmer @gimmeyoon​ - one shot | 17.1k | exes au, falling out, mutual pining, OC came back to town, summer au, coworker au, summer job at a restaurant, eventual angst (why we broke up moment), kind of star-crossed (person with a future vs someone who will hold her back) | a, s, f

Ubiquitous @sunshinejoon - drabble | 1.9k | some parts epistolary, exes au, break up au, OC/Reader discovered a stash of letters by Hoseok when they were still together | a, f

Adonis @xjoonchildx​ - one shot | 3.4k | humor/crack (this is super funny), paramedic!jimin, nosy meddling lady/neighbor who decided to play matchmaker lol, meet cute, strangers to lovers | f

Best of Me @xotoosweet​ - two shot [2/2] | 21.6k | slow burn, slice of life, hurt/comfort (themes of depression), fratboy!jimin, college au, strangers to friends to lovers, meet cute (basically saw her diving into a river), one night stand, adulting themes | f, a, implied s

Cathexis @jkeuphoriadreamland​ - series [3/3] | 27k | thriller, supernatural, firestarter!jimin, OC/Reader used to defend Jimin when he was getting bullied, Jimin comes back to town, a bit mystery (jimin’s powers), slight yandere behavior | f, s

Falling @jvngkook97​ - drabble | 990 words | exes au, reunion -  catching up over coffee, idol!jimin, mutual pining | a, f

Hooked @parkdatjimin​ - series [7/7] + drabbles | 56k | nerd!jimin, college au, fwb au, mutual pining | s, f, a

Insatiable + Illusion @artaefact - drabble | >1k | fantasy, angel!jimin x demon!reader, star-crossed forbidden romance, “when he still comes back to you” | a, bittersweet f

Midnight Munchies @yoongihime - one shot | 2.2k | humor, strangers to lovers, college au, delivery boy!jimin, customer!reader, from the prompt: “i made my special request for my pizza for them to send their cutest delivery person and you showed up and apologized that you were the only one delivering tonight and i blurted out that they still got my request right”  | tooth-rotting fluff

Rhythmic @darlingwoes - drabble | 2.2k | established relationship, boyfriend au, dancer!jimin, practice room setting, oc/reader hates the song and Jimin danced with OC to make a new memory (uWu) | f, s

The Girl Next Door @alpacaparkaseok - drabble | >3k | strangers to lovers, amusement park, mascot!jimin (he’s chimmy T_T) | f

Jimin Birthday Reblogs

a reblog of my favorite Jimin fics with this hashtag #Happy Jimin Day Fave Fics 2022

about 40+ fics 🙀

5 Times He Said I Love You @n3onguts - one shot | 5k | different versions of ‘i love you’ told throughout the course of a relationship, established relationship, break up or dissolution of a relationship, angsty | a

Armful @ughseoks - drabble | 1.2k | werewolf!taehyung, hairy arm taehyung (something I didn’t know I’d find hot but thank you dear writer), established relationship, boyfriend!taehyung, pwp | s

Broken Rings & Queens and Things @gukyi - one shot | 24k | arranged marriage, kind of fuckboy!taehyung, royalty au, enemies to lovers, prince!taehyung x princess!reader | f, slight a, slight s

Cipher @alpacaparkaseok - one shot | 14.1k | supernatural-ish, mystery, humor too (the two characters have funny exchanges in the beginning), so kind of enemies to lovers vibes too,  some plot twist, fairy tale/folk tale reference (Peter Pan & Pied Piper), fortune teller!taehyung, it’s also thrilling though it’s not the usual thriller | f, a

Cold Husband!Taehyung + Kissing each other breathless drabble @leefics​ - drabble | 1.3k | CEO!Taehyung, arranged marriage au, first kiss prompt, taehyung picking up drunk wife who got emotional thinking taehyung doesn’t like her | f (super cute)

Dickless @monimonimoon - one shot | 11.1k | OC with a boyfriend who can’t satisfy her in some ways, fwb taehyung, cheating OC (unapologetically) | s

The End of Us @angelseokjinnie - drabble | 3.4k | sugar daddy au, four years as sugar baby (by contract) - starts to develop feelings for Taehyung, just  graduated!reader  | a, s

Good Girls Go Bad @jkstompers​ - series [3/3] + drabbles | 46k+ | slow burn, hurt/comfort too for Don’t Watch Me Cry drabble, mutual pining, strangers to lovers, then friends to lovers, bad boy au, college au, intimidating taehyung x chirpy cute!oc who asked taehyung to teach her how to be bad, makeover au? | a, f, s

Higher @ppersonna - one shot | 3.8k | strangers to lovers, mile high club, airplane setting, pwp | s, slight f

Locked & Loaded @justimajin​ - one shot | 10k | action, secret agent au, coworkers, unrequited (for OC), oblivious taehyung (jungkook had to spell it out for him ugh), humor/comedy, boss!yoongi | f

Lost @salvejoon​ - one shot | 4.7k | enemies to lovers, fuckboy!taehyung, only one bed trope, getting lost, vacation au, stranded au, their best friends are dating (Jimin x OC)  but Taehung x Reader don’t like each other (or don’t they? 😉) | a, f, s

Moneyball @oshbluepacific - drabble | 2k | mafia!taehyung, husband!taehyung, arranged marriage, casino setting, some girls thirsting over taehyung and being rude to OC (not knowing she’s the wife), gambling | f

Only One Bed E2L Taehyung drabble @taestefully-in-luv​ - drabble | 3.3k | humor, e2l, only one bed trope, coworkers, rivalry since college | s

The Only One @jjungkookislife​ - one shot | 8.7k | best friend au, fuckboy!taehyung, fwb, Taehyung is from the You Up? universe (JK’s story) | s, f

Picture It @dalamjisung - one shot | 4.9k | strangers to lovers, coffee shop setting, photographer Taehyung who job hops, hurt/comfort (adulting & surviving despite parental expectations), mutual pining (they are each other’s muses and OC would write about this Taehyung she just sees at the cafe) | f (really cute and heartwarming too)

Poison Apple @jooniyah - series [3/3] | 82.36k | thriller, mafia au, yandere and psychotic behavior from Taehyung (he’s just…insane), happy ending for OC (or, for now), OC originally married to Yoongi, MIND THE TAGS!!! (not for the faint of heart) | a, s

Restart @yuudetama - drabble | 740 | break up, divorce au, taehyung and soon-to-be-ex-wife talking about turning back the clock over coffee | a (angsty but beautifully written)

Sea Star + Beside You @koyamuses​ - two shot [2/2] | 6.4k | pirate king!!taehyung, established relationship, LDR (he’s away at sea), kind of historical, childhood friends, fantasy, sex on a ship 👀, eventual proposal au, husband au | f, s

Trace the Colours of Our Skin @youmistme​ - drabble | 2.5k | artist au, blind date where they go naked and paint each other while interviewing/getting to know each other (like one of those Youtube, hurt/comfort fic | f

Under the Cloak @jungblue - one shot | 7.7k | Hogwarts AU, enemies to lovers (one-sided from OC), quidditch player!taehyung *gryffindor, tutor!reader, bet/dare themes (if he gets an A, agree on a date), use of the invisibility cloak for smutty purposes 😉 | s, slight f

Verboten @97erstan - one shot | 3.6k | cop!taehyung, best friend's boyfriend, twisted characters, themes of manipulation, plot twist | s

Your New Boss @dreamescapeswriting - one shot | 5k | CEO AU, Exes au, VP!Reader (but she doesn’t know about the new CEO which is really rare in reality but let’s assume Taehyung didn’t want the VPs to know about organization changes first), stuck in the elevator, kind of bad break up (accusations of cheating on her) | s, f

Waterloo @kinktae​ - one shot | 13k | slow burn, meet cute, strangers to lovers, artist!taehyung, art student!oc/reader, college au, vacation au, Paris setting, kind of tsundere-ish taehyung in the beginning, tourist au (oc toured him around so he can find inspiration) | f, a, implied s

(Un)welcomed Addition @joonscypher​ - one shot | 9k | neighbor au, one night stand, noona!reader, some form of bet/dare themes, college au, fuckboy!jungkook, OC/Reader already working, humor, really cute | f

A Night and a Year @dulce-jpm - one shot | 3.6k | briefly ex!yoongi x reader, arranged marriage au, past business scandal that led to cutting ties with Min family, Yoongi also broke up with her, arranged marriage with Jungkook to save “family” rep, ex-girlfriend!Sana, accused Jungkook of cheating, talks about this business/marriage | a, slight f (I still think these two deserve a drabble to see if they end up falling for each other 👀)

A Nugget of Comfort @madbutgloriouspond​ - drabble | 2.1k | established relationship, hurt/comfort fic, OC grieving over their pet hamster | f, a

Aftermath @whatifyoulivelikethat - one shot | 12.2k | exes au, stages of post-break up, accidental stalking from jungkook while OC is on a date, sub!jungkook | s

Anti-Romantic @chemicalpink​ - one shot | 4.7k | childhood friends, unrequited love (jk to oc), but his bestfriend *Sungho) ended up with oc, sungho actually cheating, oc revenge sex (with jungkook), bad decisions (like why OC why did you go through the wedding T_T) | s

Azaleas @randombtsprincessa - one shot | 9k | enemies to lovers (rivals), coworker au, lawyer au, hot intense lawyer!jungkook | f, s

The Bad Guy @ggukachuwu​ - drabble | 671 words | tattoo artist!jungkook x CEO!reader, bad boy!jungkook, secret identity (though we never know his work or why he is the bad guy) | a

Bittersweet @citrustan​ - one shot | 2.8k | ex-fwb, unrequited (oc to jungkook), falling out (oc didn’t know jk started to have serious relationship w someone else) | a

Castaway @hamsterclaw - one shot | 8.3k |  enemies to lovers in the beginning, stranded au, beach au, survival au (plane crashed on a deserted island), strangers to lovers, humor, super cute ending | s, mild a, f

CEO Junior @mooniyooni - drabble | >3k | humor, strangers, son of CEO!Jungkook, office au, meet cute, music/artist but got stuck in office work, boss-employee | f

Comfortable, Bare, and Hungry @jinkookspencil​ - drabble | 2.6k | established relationship, boyfriend au, hurt/comfort fic, they ate pizza while naked | f, suggestive s

Denial = Desperation @adonis-koo - drabble | 3k | drabble from the series Wicked where Jungkook is just fantasizing about OC, series tags/genres ➡️arranged marriage, enemies to lovers, historical, royalty au | s

Drive @sunshinejoon - drabble | >1k | FWBs who are pining for each other, idiots to lovers, angsty beginning | a, f

Duty Before Love + Part 2 @blue-jade - two shot [2/2] | 10.4k | royalty au, agreed infidelity (jungkook’s wife chose OC/reader to be the child bearer), pregnancy au, historical, forbidden/star-crossed (royalty x servant!reader), unrequited love | a, s, f

Echoes of Love @moonlightchildz - one shot | 2.5k | exes au, break up au,  jungkook broke up with OC and we don’t know why T_T, feat. best friend!taehyung | a, s, f

Exposed @getitinbusan - drabble | 2.1k | photographer!reader, dispatch photoshoot, idol!jungkook, tattooed!jungkook, pwp and really filthy | s

The Hardest Part @kimnjss - one shot | 2.5k | bestfriend au, unrequited (for OC), jungkook is getting married, extra angsty, something I probably read 3x now T_T | a

Heat Rises @dreamyjoons - drabble | 1.1k | boyfriend au, established relationship, pwp, hair pull + shower sex, that curly Jungkook from 5th Muster | s

Kinktober 2022: October 1 corruption kink with jeon jeongguk @seokgism - drabble | 3k | corruption kink, virgin!jungkook, experienced!oc, happens during the family dinner lol | s, pwp

Late Night Assignment @writeformesinpie - one shot | 2.7k | CEO!Jungkook, boss-employee, office au, OC/Reader has a date and Jungkook couldn’t function a bit at the thought lol, very funny banter and JK with wild exaggerated imagines about OC and her date, humor | s

Like Stars in a Constellation @taegills​ - one shot | 20.9k | sci-fi, star-crossed love, time travel au of sorts only they are meeting in reverse (one timeline is forward while the other is backward), strangers to lovers at one point, established relationship at one point, kind of bittersweet | a, f, s (implied)

The Love Bug @jungkxook - one shot | 20.6k | neighbor au, childhood friends (more on acquaintance), college, secret identity (duh, he’s spiderman), adaptation: spiderman au, superpower/superhero au, spiderman!jungkook | f, s

Lover Boy @ughseoks - drabble | <1k | humor, heartwarming, established relationship, lots of dick jokes lol, boyfriend!jungkook x oc in a romantic bath together (tub scenario) | f

Nanny @jjungkookislife - drabble | 700+ words | nanny!reader, single dad!jungkook, pwp| implied s

On Camera @agustdiv1ne - one shot | 3.1k | established relationship, boyfriend!jungkook, gamer au, youtuber!jungkook, pwp about jungkook recording their smutty moments | s

Ours @v-hope - drabble | 2.3k |  best friend au, also childhood friends, now roommates in college, tooth-rotting fluff, domestic vibes, living with your best friend turned longing for exclusivity (just read my reaction I poured my entire giddy heart into it) | f

Pardon the Interruption @strawbkoo - one shot | 4.4k | established relationship, coworker seoyeon keeps interrupting their sexy time/moments, pwp | s

Perfect Coincidence @smilingleoo - one shot | 4.7k | DJ!reader, football team captain!jungkook, popular jungkook who was having an affair with the Math Teacher (uhm police alert 👀), party au (they did it on Hoseok’s couch), Hoseok is OC/Reader’s best friend and it’s his party | s, pwp

Picture Perfect @upinthestarsx3 - one shot | 879 words | best friend au, photographer!jungkook, needs to take photos of her nude for a magazine but turned smutty | s, pwp

Risk it All @httpjeon - series [5/5] | 14.1k | hybrid au, wolf!jungkook, I included this in the werewolf fic rec list though he’s not really a werewolf lol (he doesn’t shift), alpha!jungkook, a/b/o dynamics, predator-prey dynamics in this au, OC got thrown in a warehouse filled with predators and there’s also jungkook | f, a, s

Save You @mimikookie​ - drabble | 4k | supernatural, fantasy, post-apocalyptic, a bit of action, star-crossed vibes, archangel!jungkook x human!reader, it’s just intense and feels like some epic scene, war? (the angels were fighting and some creatures attacking humans), badass OC | a, f

SPF 50 @gimmeyoon - one shot | 10.6k | coworker au, strangers to friends to lovers, summer au, lifeguard!jungkook, slow burn, kind of bittersweet (because summer love stories usually are) | a, f, s

Strangers to Lovers @kissmetae​ - one shot | 3.2k | uhm strangers to lovers, gym crush!jungkook, gym setting, role playing | s, f

Symmetry @adriftmoonchild​ - one shot | 10k | enemies to lovers, fwb au, hogwarts au, mutual pining, secret relationship, rich!OC/reader, magic, kind of forbidden relationship (pure blood!oc x half-blood jungkook) and OC arranged to marry someone else | s, a, f

Vampire’s Kiss @immabiteyou - one shot | 4k | bartender!reader, bar au, vampire!jungkook, jk in all black | s

When We Were Sixteen @seokjiniwithluv - one shot | 10.3k | moments with jungkook told per year, best friend au, parts namjoon x reader & jungkook x hana, a bit taehyung x reader, high school to college to working, unrequited, falling out of some sort,jungkook leaving the country and friends jimin/taehyung checking on OC, angst with happy ending for OC | a, f

posted: 2022 Nov 5

link to other reading lists

other fic rec lists (by theme)

feel free to message me about fics! (leads to @ggukkiereads 🌷)

.

[l0sercat]

Yandere alphabet with King Baldwin IV

MDNI because this is dark content!

Affection — how do they show their love and affection?

He shower's you in gifts and love. Anything you want or he thinks would look good on you he would buy you. He doesn't know how else to show how he loves you so he just spoils you.

Blood — how messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

He will make sure anyone who disrespects you, looks at you funny, or talks bad about you will die. He won't kill anyone for just anything he is a king with a reputation after all.

Cruelty — how would they treat their darling once abducted?

He would treat you like a goddess. Your his everything and even though it's selfish to keep you and wrong before he dies he just wants to experience love and comfort.

Darling — aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

He doesn't like to do things your not comfortable with. But he sometimes just can't help it and forcibly holds you down and cuddles you. He likes to feel your warm embrace, it makes him sad that you fight him, but he understands he did abduct you.

Exposed — how vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He is pretty vulnerable especially because of his disease. He shows his soft side and loves you with everything he has. He wants you to to feel comfortable and safe with him. Even when he feels weak he comes to see you even if you might attack him while he's weak.

Fight — how would they feel if their darling fought back?

He's understanding but it still makes him sad. He would've hoped you would warm up to him with his he spoils you. If you keep fighting back and are a risk to his safety he will have to begrudgingly tie you up in his chambers.

Game — is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

He does not like to see you fight and struggle. When you kick him and dash out of the room and into the halls trying to flee his guards. He already told the guards before hand that you are not to leave the palace. So they surround you and wait for him to get you himself. Baldwin is deeply hurt and upset and stumbles his way towards you. Your sobbing and screaming, you apologize and then curse at him. Your a wreak and Baldwin just slaps you across the face. His one eye is glaring at you and that shuts you up. You've never seen him like that and he doesn't feel like arguing with you. Your stumbling behind him with tears running down your face. You thought you could've gotta way but you were apparently wrong. (Sorry for this long ass paragraph lmfao)

Hell — what would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Similar to the experience I just wrote above lol. But this time they try sneaking out in the dead of night. He's tightly gripping you and having you pressed against his chest. You sneakily get out of his grasp and try to leave. But there are guards posted outside your bedroom, so they catch you immediately. Your kicking and screaming and Baldwin is just shaking his head. He decides to tie you to his bed. Your hands above your head and feet bound together. Your gagged and crying and Baldwin is just glaring at you, deeply upset. You'd be bound for a couple days only being untied for necessities like bathing, eating, and bathroom. He'd ignored you only giving you passing glances or untying you.

Ideals — what kind of future do they have in mind for their darling?

He wants a family but he doubts it'll go well because of his leprosy. He wants at least 4-5 kids and to live a long life but he knows he only has a couple years left to life. So he will settle with just you by his side and ruling Jerusalem.

Jealousy — do they get jealous? How do they handle it?

He hardly ever gets jealous because no one will ever get close to you. Maybe if you get to close to some of the ladies and your attention is taken up.

Kisses — how do they act around or with their darling?

He is always holding onto you. Wether it's your hand or waist. He's clingy especially when you guys are alone. Even during sex he is in the most intimate positions. He just loves being close by you.

Love letters — how would they go about approaching their darling?

He would court you as if you refuse he'd be sad, but then remembers he's king so he just takes you as his.

Mask — are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Yes. You'll be treated like a god(dess) and he's happy with you. But in front of others he s fearless powerful leader.

Naughty — how would they punish their darling?

Ties you up in his room and kills anyone who tries to help you. He'll have them excuted and make you watch. He doesn't like seeing you gagged and crying but it's what'll happen if you try to leave him.

Oppression — how many rights would they take away from their darling?

Not many. He'll let you roam around but only with him around or one of his most trusted guards.

Patience — how patient are they with their darling?

He's a very patient man. He will wait for a long time for you to warm up to him. But he doesn't have long so he can't wait forever. If he has too he will force you to do things.

Quite — if their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

If you die he would mourn u til the day he dies. He'll never get over you and he's actually glad he'll die young so he can see you soon. If you escape he'll be crushed and have some of his men search for you. He'll be looking for you til he dies and he'll never get over you.

Regret — would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling?

Yes but in the end he'll block it out and pretend like you wanted him and everything is normal.

Stigma — what brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Probably childhood. Never truly sharing a bond with anyone but his sister. He's lonely and need someone by his side.

Tears — how do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

He hates it and will try to soothe you and make you calm down and if that doesn't work he'll give you space.

Unique — would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

He actually takes you out in public. Go to the local markets and stuff and you'll be able to talk to people.

Vice — what weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Yes. He's very fragile because of leprosy. But because of that he will always have guards outside of his room because he knows you'll try to exploit this weakness.

Wit’s end — would they ever hurt their darling?

Yes but on accident. You'd get hurt from the ropes he tied you with or accidentally gripping your arm to hard. Nothing serious.

Xoanon — how much would they revere or worship their darling?

He worship's his darling so much. Like your his everything and he loves you so much. If you treat him the same way he treats you he will literally melt.

Yearn — how long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

He'll long after you for about a year then take you. During that year he'll court you but if you don't return the feelings he has no choice but to take you.

Zenith — would they ever break their darling?

No because he treat's you so good and actually doesn't abuse you like most yandere's would.

[melefim]

Swearing in Dead Boy Detectives: Fuck

Overview:

Fuck was said a total of 90 times, in all 8 episodes and by 15 different characters.

Uses Per Episode:

Fuck is said in all 8 episodes of the show, one of only 4 words to do so.

Episode 1: 7

Episode 2: 5

Episode 3: 13

Episode 4: 5

Episode 5: 8

Episode 6: 13

Episode 7: 16

Episode 8: 23

Uses Per Character:

Fuck is said by 15 different characters, more than any other word.

Edwin: 2

Charles: 5

Crystal: 20

Jenny: 18

David: 12

Esther: 6

The Cat King: 6

Tabby Cat: 2

Calico Cat: 1

Litty: 8

Kingham: 5

Brad: 2

Hunter: 1

Twitchy Richie: 1

Girl in Crystal’s Memory 2 (Club Fight): 1

Percent of Total:

Fuck is used 90 times, which is 27.9% of cursing in the show.

Variations:

There are 7 variations of the word used in the show, with the most popular being Fuck, which was used 42 times.

Fuck: 42

Fucking: 37

Fucked-up: 7

Fucked: 1

Fucker: 1

Fuckboy: 1

Mindfuck: 1

Rankings:

Total Uses: Fuck comes in first for total uses, being said 90 times.

Number of Episodes: Fuck is one of only four curse words that is said in all 8 episodes- the others are Shit, Ass, and God.

Most Uses of a Word in a Single Episide: Fuck holds 5 of the top 11 spots.

Most Uses of a Word by a Single Character in One Episode: Fuck took the title here as well, being said 10 times by Jenny in episode 8.

Total Characters: Fuck comes in first for number of characters to say it, with 15 using it throughout the show.

It is one of only two words said by the main trio of Edwin, Charles, and Crystal, the other being Damn.

It is one of only four words said by both Edwin and Charles—the others being Damn, Bloody, and Bloody Hell.

Favorite Word: Fuck is the favorite word of 7 different characters: Jenny (18), David (12), Litty (8), The Cat King (6), Kingham (5), Tabby Cat (2), and Brad (2).

Curse Word Variations: It comes in first for most variations, with 7.

Lines:

Episode 1:

Charles: Edwin, hurry the fuck up!

David: I'll fucking gut you! (x2 while possessing Crystal)

Crystal: It's just a stupid fucking name.

Tabby Cat: Fuck you. I'm not telling you nothing about that house or the witch inside.

Crystal: So maybe he's our fucking demon now!

Edwin: Police don't know what to do with a fucking witch!

Episode 2:

Litty: Little ghost fucker!

Litty: I'm gonna tell you something, because I think you really need to hear it, okay? You should go fuck yourself.

Litty: You know what? You can take that sweater and you can shove it up your ass. Do you have any clue how powerful we are? We are fucking gods!

Kingham: You better hope we never get out of here or we are going to fuck you up, like 'brass knuckles and mace' fuck you up!

Episode 3:

Jenny: It's a super fucked-up story so I'm gonna need some coffee

Crystal: What the actual fuck?

Calico Cat: At least we don't have to go inside. This house is fucked up.

Crystal: Just what the fuck is it?

Litty: Looks like they left you behind because you fucking suck.

Litty: They're all gonna fucking die.

Litty: We were fucking kidding, can't you take a fucking joke?

Litty: Stupid fucking bitch!

Charles: I'm just sick of watching this asshole kill his family a million times for no fucking reason. Tried it your way, and it did nothing. Sod it. Let's try mine. (x2 due to time loop)

Charles: His dad was bad, Edwin. Royally fucked-up bad.

Crystal: I am done wasting my energy on your fuckboy bullshit.

Episode 4:

Jenny: Ok, so you're what? You're just, you're not gonna leave until I explain this even though it's private and go the fuck away?

Tabby Cat: Fuck off. The kid had a sardine.

Crystal: You fucked with my head, I'm gonna fuck with yours.

Charles: Every day, I'm fucking smiling.

Episode 5:

Twitchy Richie: The fuck is this?

Jenny: Oh my fuck.

Crystal: You walk around acting like the sun always shines, and then you lost your shit while beating the Night Nurse. Edwin and I are walking on eggshells around you instead of just saying 'what the actual fuck?'

Jenny: What the fuck, Maxine?

Hunter: Oh, fuck that, you whiny little bitch.

Brad: It's a fucking tragedy that we died, okay?

Brad: What the fuck does that mean?

David: I'm a demon! And I always get what I fucking want!

Episode 6:

Crystal: I want to keep this demon the fuck out.

Jenny: Just like whatever the fuck I am doing is none of yours.

Crystal: It's like he's fucking haunting me.

David: Oh no, I'm so fucking scared.

Charles: Don't listen to him Crystal, it's just some sort of a mindfuck, innit?

David: Why the fuck do you smell so weak?

David: What the fuck did you do?

Crystal: I gave up my powers, OK? I got you out of my fucking head.

David: Now, she's just another fucking terrified lump of human flesh!

Crystal: I am nothing special, So why don't you just leave me the fuck alone?

David: Did you really think that you could beat me with a fucking cricket bat?

The Cat King: Do you hear me? I will stop fucking playing nice!

Esther: Teeth Face, what the fuck?

Episode 7:

The Cat King: Why the fuck are you here?

Esther: I know you blew up Monty's spot, you little fucking snitch.

The Cat King: I don't give a fuck, OK? End of audience.

The Cat King: That was my third life, you bitch. I only get nine. Would you fuck off? Fuck!

Crystal: Fucking bullshit, like I can't help.

Crystal: God, that's fucking insane.

Jenny: Fucking kid.

Jenny: What the fuck?

David: Why the fuck would you even want that?

David: What the fuck did you do? Where are we?

David: Maybe I was just fucking with you.

David: Fuck! Fine, you got your memories back.

Jenny: What the fuck was that?

Esther: You, you.. you think that you're the only one who's ever been screwed over? You're not. I fucking deserve this!

Edwin: That is so fucking stupid, It's unbelievable!

Episode 8:

Girl in Crystal’s Memory 2 (Club Fight): Get your fucking hands off my boyfriend, you slut!

Crystal: Oh, my God. Oh, I'm a fucking awful person. Oh, God, I'm the worst.

Jenny: What the actual fuck?

Jenny: And why the ever-loving fuck is my hair braided?

Jenny: Fuck that! That is bullshit!

Jenny: No fucking way.

Kingham: "No fucking way" to you. "No fucking way" to that side braid. What the fuck is that?

Jenny: Fucking fuck!

Jenny: Screw it. I'd rather know my own life, no matter how fucked-up.

Jenny: Jesus, fuck!

Crystal: Fuck! (Esther has the boys)

Jenny: I figure a meat cleaver can cut up a witch, but what the fuck do I know anymore?

Crystal: Because whatever fucked-up little thing you have going on with Edwin, you must care about him a little.

The Cat King: Fuck me. Did you even listen to my story?

Esther: Oh my God, my own sacrificial knife? I'm impressed. But I'm not fucking around that you're also gonna patch that wall before you die too.

Esther: Who the fuck are you?

Esther: What the fuck? Hey hey hey no! What did you just do?

Jenny: God, that sounds so fucking procedural.

Crystal: I don't have to give up my new fucked-up life while I'm trying to sort out my old fucked-up life.

Notes:

Not included:

In episode 1, Crystal flips off Edwin in the malt shop.

In episode 2, Litty flips off Charles, Edwin, and Crystal with both hands, and then later Kingham and Litty both flip off Edwin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

More Dead Boy Detectives Swearing Posts:

Masterlist

Swearing by Episode

Swearing by Character

Swearing by Word

All Swearing Posts

And if you like lists of things like I do, you can check out my other Dead Boy Detectives ones here!

When Charles’ Shirt Colors Change

George Rextrew’s Edwin comic inspo board

Full soundtrack with timestamps

Moves, Incidents, and Cases Masterlist

First pass at finding where the songs in the score are used- full post with timestamps in progress

[allastoredeer]

Hello I had this dream last night and I need to share it with you!!!

We know the whole crew is invited to the Cannibal Cookout for the weekend.

So I imagine Al is gonna let cameras take pictures of him and Lucifer, that way the headline of his relationship with the king of hell will reach the seven pentagram faster(it was showed that he can take pictures when he wants to, since vox kept one). But that also mean he is gonna be exposed for the first time in probably forever. Like he is known for his terrifying radio podcast, which means that not many ppl know about his true form, especially new born sinners. So I can only imagine the surprise of those people to see the radio demon , the scariest overlord of them all, being a cute deer with a a fluffy tail and all the package that comes with it. Also Alastor mentioned to Lucy to ‘Wear your Sunday best.”, which might imply that he is gonna wear something nice as well…

It would be hilarious if Half of hell will start simping for Alastor and downright ignoring Lucifer.

I can imagine the internet exploding with Alastor pictures and people going like 'aww his ears are moving’ or something, sinners go as far as make fan club about him, meanwhile a certain picture box is having a mental breakdown…

~Valentino: “u know u can just say it that u want him”

~Vox: “Alright alright fuck yea I do and so Does half of hell. God damn it”

Meanwhile Angel reading through the chaos Alastor just unleashed

“oh he is so stealing my job already”

Lmao

OFC In all of this Al is completely oblivious about the situation he caused, so the crew tries to keep him out the flow, to not freak him out, which it’s not hard at all, since the dude doesn’t have a phone, but he does get a bit suspicious when Lucifer makes him wear something to cover his upper body, almost as far as making him wear an hat and glasses lol(I don’t see Lucifer as being who enjoys losing himself on new trends and gossip on the internet, so Angel probably showed him a innocent picture of them, but Lucy made the bad choice to go read through the comments. Nonetheless to say he was scarred for life, and decided to take it upon himself to protect Alastor’s privacy)

Also Alastor can probably sense when someone takes pictures of him, twitching his eyes and tail but otherwise leaves it be for the sake of maintaining the charade.

This was it ehehe, I kinda felt bad I woke up from that dream, I honestly wanted to know how it ended.

Either way I can’t wait to see how u are planning to go with it. Cause I just know u are gonna make me love every second of it😆👌

thank you for listening

Ps I wrote this at 5 in the morning a week ago, and I am not sure if I already sent it to u or my mind is playing tricks to me…so I am sorry if u already got the message.

Heheheheh I love this! You have the BEST dreams. I'm so in love with most of Hell not knowing Alastor, or not really remembering what he looked like, since he's been gone (and Hell is expanding by the thousands every day, so of course there would be people who don't know him).

And so they see him for the first time and it's such a stark difference to what they were expecting XD He's developing a fan-base and Lucifer has to scare them all of (otherwise Alastor WILL murder. He will).

And no worries! I did get the ask from earlier! Sometimes, if it takes me a long time to get to an ask, that's because I want to draw some doodles for it like the pics above ^.^

[s1llysmut]

NSFW Alphabet for Lucifer

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He is immediately asking you if you need anything, getting you water, snacks, running you both a bath, cuddles. Surprisingly if you take a bath with him it won’t lead to more sex unless you initiate it. Don’t get me wrong, he loves having sexy time with you but he also loves those intimate moments after sex.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite body part of himself is probably his tongue. He considers himself quite talented when it comes to oral. His favourite body part of yours is definitely your thighs. He LOVES to squeeze them and have his head between them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He LOVES to cum inside of you. He literally begs you for it every single time.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He loves to be pegged. Honestly is that really a secret though?

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He is extremely experienced. I mean come on this is the king of hell we’re talking about, of course he knows what he’s doing! How else did he pull Lilith AND Eve?!

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He loves missionary because he can see your beautiful face but he also loves being ridden. He just loves when you use him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He definitely allows himself and you to be goofy. However if it’s your first time together and you laugh at a mistake he makes he might get a little insecure.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He doesn’t shave but he does keep it well trimmed. It’s blonde like his hair.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

He is extremely romantic. He is such a sap I swear to god. He would unironically do those cliche rose petals and candles. Don’t laugh at him okay? He’s trying to be a good partner.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I have a feeling he gets morning wood like every single damn morning so I feel like he masturbates mostly in the mornings. Only if you’re not there to help him though.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He loves being praised. He’s a sucker for it. Tell him he’s making you feel good and he’ll fold entirely. BUT he also likes being degraded to a degree. Call him a good little slut and he’ll die.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere literally anywhere.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Praise, teasing touches, slight degradation, whispering in his ear, etc.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Knife play. He doesn’t wanna hurt you ever. No matter how much you reassure him it would still make him way too anxious.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He loves when you suck him off but he also loves eating you out/sucking you off. He loves your thighs wrapped around his head and as I said before he’s very skilled with his tongue.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

That depends on what you want. He however prefers to go slow and sensual. He wants to feel every inch of you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn’t mind them however he does prefer to take his time with you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yes he will definitely take risks. He’s a sucker for you so he’s willing to try pretty much anything if it’ll make you happy.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can go probably quite a few rounds. I’m thinking maybe 5? He likes being overstimulated.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He probably owns a dildo and a fleshlight for himself when you’re not around.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He might tease you a little bit but like I said, he’s down bad for you, anything you ask you will receive.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

If he’s dominant he’ll be moaning and grunting , some panting here and there too. However, if he’s the submissive, he is full on whimpering and whining.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He would 100% let you step on him. He loves when you’re dominant so much.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s thickkkk. He’s about 7 or 8 inches long too. You’re in for a longgggg night.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He has a fairly high sex drive. He likes doing it daily soooo good luck.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

As soon as he’s sure you’re comfortable and content, he’ll cuddle up and sleep with you.