#what do the dogs get if they win? this :)
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i wish someone would say that to me one day with just as much sincerity.
#what do the dogs get if they win? this :)#i just had to clip this moment it was so damn funny to me#she's so serious as she says it#crufts25
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I think a lot about Leoâs tendency to push his way into the spotlight despite clearly being a natural in the shadows. Hell, you could argue that his worst moments are when heâs forcing himself onstage, and his best are when he does things no one notices until itâs already been done.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#His aptitude with subterfuge sleight of hand stealth and speed really push how being a ninja really comes naturally to him.#itâs arguable that his desperation for the spotlight and validation is an act of subterfuge against himself#note that when heâs offered a job as a mascot heâs fine being unknown#when he and splinter win the battle nexus Leo immediately says âthey love YOU popsâ#idk I think so much about how good a ninja Leo is#and how much his persona is more an actor#Leo as a tot is shown a natural skill at katana too so hear me out-#every Leo is a natural ninja but every Leoâs route in life is directly tied to their splinter so#since rise splinter is an actor Leo too aims for it#and he brings it into his whole life - masking always because a Leo makes what they do who they are#I think that Leo naturally falls more in line with that of a typical ninja#his eccentric performer self is his subterfuge skill just set to an 11 at all times#not that thatâs NOT him - like I said itâs still undoubtedly a part of Leo#but? idk I think about little moments like Leo being the only one to choose stealth in bug busters#or Leo being the only one to almost get Gusâs dog tags in The Ninja Art of Hide and Seek (he was so close but luck was against him alas)#like- heâs clearly in his element there and he falls into those skills so easily#itâs like how everyone has skills in so many things but some exceed more in some than others do#like Raph? Raphâs the biggest Hero of the bunch of them letâs be perfectly real here. Raph is THE Hero#All the boys are smart in their own rights but Donnie is THE Genius.#and they all have mystic powers but Mikey is THE Mystic Warrior with immense untapped potential#likewise Leo I feel is THE Ninja#but yeah I love how much Leo goes for the spotlight anyway for better or for worse#he IS a performer again make no mistake! but again the way he does it still lines up with his natural ninja aptitude and I love it#Leo loving magic tricks and magicians so much works doubly well here because like#youâd think heâs focused solely on the performance flair - no itâs ALSO and ESPECIALLY the DECEPTION
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Orlaâs liberation comes at the price of the mercâs. The further they entrench themself into being used as an implement for her to use to her ends, the more divorced they become to themself (though, even thatâs a bit complicated. Who is the merc without Orla? Her guiding hand. Her crook shepherding. Her word governing.) Sheâs building her empire; the mercâs shoveling their grave. But at the same time, her empire doesnât necessarily guarantee her own (true) freedom and is, in fact, a kind of gilded cage in its own right. You painstakingly build yourself a palace behind enemy lines, with all the luxuries you can scrounge together. Give yourself every comfort, loud music to drown out whatever ghosts youâre still trying to outrun, good sex, good food, people who will jump to murder for you without blinking an eye⊠yet itâs difficult to truly allow yourself to relish in any of it for more than a couple fleeting moments when you know there are serpents slithering just right outside the gates. Doesnât matter how much you fortify your house of cards, it can still all come crumbling down with a gust of wind. And what then? One king (queen) deposes another, Vapolis continues on. No one will mourn. Orla knows this. Orla is terrified by this.
Anyway.. @vapolis sending you my therapy bill as I type this.
#sorry Iâm going through it#orlaaaa my light my life my whole day longgg#I want to know her every thought and emotion this is very serious for me#finally got over being annoyed at PayPal being the only option for ko-fi payment and got a membership because I needed more orla and wellâŠ#Iâm not feeling very normal about her. but when am I ever#AND THIS ISNT EVEN GETTING INTO THE FACT THAT SHES A WOMAN! FUCK!!!#like something something trying to carve out your own space in a world full of men who probably see you as no different from the women#they use and discard#whatever.#the idea of ruining orla by fully devoting yourself to her. hold on.#like yes I am going to be the most useful and obedient dog youâve ever had. when you shut your golden cage behind you itâll ring#like a bell and not the clang of a cell.#does this make sense? am I making sense?#something something mutually assured destruction#you donât gain freedom by doing what orla does. not in any real meaningful sense.#the only way to win is to not play#but when you come from where sheâs come from⊠youâve gotta gamble#but itâs such a Faustian deal#anyway itâll probably be the death of both her and the merc. let me shut up the thought of her dying just made me ill#whatever. whateverrrr#vapolis makes sinners of us all - if you arenât there yet youâre certainly on your way!#**these are just my own personal thoughts and interpretations**#also apologies mara if you donât care to be tagged in things like this! Iâll remove it if so#if: rywd#+ orla đ« (rywd)#meta
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as a true geto hater it brings me immense joy to remember that he got packed up by a suicidal anxious loser w/ the power of true love who hadn't even learned his own cursed technique yet and had been studying jujutsu for less than a year
#honestly getting packed up by yuuta pre or post-ct is so embarrassing bc u let a 5'9 loser boy put you in the ground? GET REAL#this isn't yuuta slander btw its just like. he's such a loser its unfathomable to me yk. like i love him so bad his scary dog privileges#are gone. like wdym the greatest kindest most anxious dude of all time killed you? you sound like the boy who cried wolf#was he even 5'9 in jjk 0 he honestly looked about 5'7 at best#how i feel when i see yuuta win a fight is how i feel when i see naruto win a fight yk#like that's my man ofc he won but also ... thats my man and i know him so how did u lose lol get ratioed#like either (a) how bad did u fumble or (b) what did u do to piss him off damn#anyway real talk why was geto a special grade... seems like gege was glazing to me imo#like we were just supposed to accept that eating curses and controlling them is special grade activity like.... ok.........#fraud watch for life im afraid
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#vent post#vent blogging#Sevenâs Public Diary#motivating myself to study for my driverâs permit by thinking of the Freedom and independence a license would grant me? â 1/10 ineffective#motivating myself to study for my driverâs permit by imagining all the new & different possible ways i could become injured in a car crash?#â
7/10 it just might fucking work!!!#the only true cure for OCD is to face oneâs fears. but i just might be able to find a loophole via my ever-worsening mental health#because you donât have to Face your fears if you donât Have any fears#and in order to rid myself of my fears regarding harm coming to myself. i simply have to stop fearing being harmed#and what better way to stop fearing it than to actively crave it!#or at the very least become so overwhelmed that i lose the capacity to feel any particular way about it#iâve found a new OCD cure everybody - Just Stop Caringâąïž /sarc#well. sarcastic or joking for everyone else. but im serious when it applies to me#bc so much of my anxiety comes from feeling unsafe. so i just have to reach the point where i stop caring if im safe or not. easy peasy#like yes i know this is flawed and unhealthy logic but iâve resisted more compulsions via this method lately than i have via anything else#and even outside of OCD stuff even just for all my other anxiety disorders itâs also worked. im actually making a modicum of progress now#need to make a scary phone call? just get into a 3-hour family argument and then youâll be so upset that you donât feel fear! :)#genuinely worked very well. scared of a home invasion? well at least itâd mean youâd have some different company for once!#you might make a new friend! or if they **** you at least youâd have some Real trauma for once. itâs a win-win honestly âŠ/hj#so. scared to drive? well even if you Do crash at least it might lead to a hospital visit and then youâll finally get that attention you-#-want so fucking badly! youâll finally get a break from everything while you recover. or even if you donât survive- well. i shanât say.#anyways. the âyouâ in those tags is me talking to myself for the record. i wouldnât speak to anyone else like this. i just speak in the-#-wrong tense/person sometimes. donât know whatâs up with that. just another reason i need to stop speaking altogether. as iâve learned#iâve been trying So fucking hard to be nice lately. letting them walk all over me. and itâs still not enough. cause iâm always-#-âusing the wrong toneâ and âif all im gonna do is say smthn negative i just shouldnât speak at allâ ..okay! gladly!!!#sorry for being autistic and unsocialized and under immense stress and being unable to keep my âtoneâ under control. my bad.#i just need to get blackout drunk with Venti at Angelâs Share. that would fix me.#that or heading down to the bottom of the Fortress of Meropide and curl up like a dog under Wriothesleyâs desk. head empty no thoughts#not sexually. just. in a pet-regression sense. i canât stop thinking abt it. i wanna write a oneshot for it but i canât focus these days#anyways. the delusional maladaptive daydream dissociation will continue until morale improves. and brother itâs only getting worse.
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what answers give you the matthew result :)

i got his result 3 seperate times and these were the answers as listed above. the commonality between all 3 are dog, night, music, beach, pizza, and trucks but that doesnt mean much if we dont exactly know what constitutes as a point in favour of maffhew but is fun to look at and seeing which one youd /think/ would be something that seems like him
#ask#i think the funniest thing is that my original results where i tried to answer as honestly as i could i got benny#which was me trying to answer as honestly as i could so:#cat/introvert/night/cook at home/music/sneakers/beach/pizza/sports/cycling/trucks#and went huh what if i put dog instead and run it through would it change anything#then got maffhew#and went yeah lmao that checks out ofc#id assume the scoring system is majority cat point total (tigerbeat style) wins#do with this what you will#but if anyone remembered what answers resulted in other cats that arent nate forsy swaggy or benny id like to know#or hell even if you did get them id still like to know to figure out what the point total is#id love being insane about the equivalent of a team mandated quotev quiz
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it really is frustrating when people don't take your favourite character seriously and that's my curse, being a fan of silly little guys. only i see their depth. only i do not automatically pick the funniest option in any poll just because the character is funny only i actually think the options through this is a CURSE.
#sorry i'm still thinking about a poll about what pet pippin would have! the winning option was FERRET.#because isn't that silly? and isn't pippin silly? and yes he can be but he also is loyal and kind and energetic and fun-loving#and his father owns a farm. he would have a dog you dumb bitches.#his father would buy a dog to help out on the farm a big ole shaggy sheepdog and pippin (probably a small child at this point) would fall#deeply in love with the dog and suddenly the dog is no longer a worker he is a pampered member of the took family. duh.#no one understands this because no one but me thinks about him on a level deeper than 'haha silly dumb hobbit'. and even that's wrong!!#when i say no one else gets him like i do i am being so unbelievably serious you have no idea
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ngl i think i kind of was a genius for being like 'yeah this character is a scary killyou cannibal scary killer who scary kills you' and then realizing that the way my worldbuilding works out is that there's a nonzero chance that if you leave literally any body parts over they can just come back, depending on what they believe in their heart of hearts can kill them. Of course she'd start eating her kills. She probably tried normal stuff first and then realized it didn't work and she had to try harder if she wanted to actually keep them dead.
#red rambles#im working on a character who i made up years and years ago and wasnt even happy with then because he didnt seem to have enough like#interior thoughts he was just like a guy who killed people when he was stressed and his life was constantly stressful and then he killed on#person too many and they were like 'this is fucking untenable and he has to die' and then they killed him#which is soooooooooo absolutely nothing honestly. Like it works as a barebones summary but i want to stress there was actually straight up#nothing else there. the entire rest of his whole whatnot was just being entangled with Haven who is a different character who at the time#ALSO felt unsatisfyingly lacking in interiority but at lesat he had really complex motivations and action flowcharts. that werent just 'i#get grumpy and i just go kill some random person with no regard for what the consequences will be and then i am so mean and i kill you'#now theres a lot more happening. i really didnt. like.#okay so i had a Backstory worked out but it was vague because i didnt know what the fuck he WANTEDDDDDDD right like. i had no motivations a#literally all except 'oohhh i kill people ooohhh i like killing people ooohhh im erratic i kill people' and the background i HAD was like.#Upper class scion of some rich family whose family honest to god just did not like him very much and also [gestures vaguely] i guess he#maybe kicked dogs or something and then he ??nebulous timeline meets haven and then kills his sister or kills his sister and very quickly#thereafter meets haven but i usually lean toward the former because haven LOVES convincing people to kill their whole families its like#cathartic for him because he would love to kill his entire family but physically cannot do it. but like kind of the implications of this#as far as i was concerned given this is set in the mid 1800s was like. ehhh he's getting away with this because he's rich white and male an#it pays to turn a blind eye to his indiscretions or w/e. a genderswap means that she'd be subject to a lot more scrutiny on basis of like#misogyny. LOL. and i already had the preexisting 'hates half sibling' (i genderswapped the sister into a brother because why not) and 'hate#parents' and 'parents strongly dislike her' and 'unsettling' and it worked nicely to start giving me actual fucking. Literally anything to#work with there. because it means that by going off with Haven she walks out of one situation where she has like 0 agency into another one#and like to be clear i respect anyone who is sitting around in haven's general vicinity for snapping and just starting to kill people. me t#but this works. SOOOOOOOOOO much better for real#im still working the kinks out but like also this means that she wins. she wins like multiple times actually. she comes closer to killing#haven than anyone since he learned what fucking species he was and causes him more trouble in the interest of getting the FUCK out of there#than anyone else has and then she fucking gets what she was going for against literally every effort haven could've made over ~five decades#get owned loser.#every time i draw her i cant help it i write some shit like PLEASE JUST GET DIVORCED on it even though i wrote the fucking narrative i know#it will never fucking happen and thats why she does all this shit instead#in another world she'd be like the wildly capable owner of Raytheon 2 or some other shit like that. like she'd never be a nice or good#person but she wouldn't be dead. god she could be in charge of a country or some shit. Alas. Please get divorced.
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youâre a big âmori is a horrible person but that doesnât mean he isnât a good villain and interesting to analyzeâ person which makes me wonder: what do you think of fukuchi?
Oh I hate him XD
#hi grandpa warcrimes please stop talking#lemme make it clear though asagiri 100% wanted us to hate him in the way i hate him#which is#why does he keep getting away with being so op#why does he just keep winning#man talks big and yet betrays all his subordinates at the drop of a hat#like to be fair we dont know yet what his big reason for doing so is yet#only that it made atsushi hesitate#but BOY OH BOY does he make terrible evil decisions and then justify them#i think the big difference between him and mori and why mori is a more likable character (aside from like#the fact that mori technically an ally#is that mori rationalizes all of his decisions and puts his feelings on the backburner for his goals#fukuchi meanwhile. his feelings ARE whats driving his decisions. he did fucked up shit and then started blaming the world for it and doing#MORE fucked up shit#anyway cant wait for someone to kick his ass finally#bsd#asks#bungou stray dogs
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youtube
i'm still there
#what a mf has to do to see alex win a race#can you believe i was at the nĂŒrb THE DAY BEFORE#he crashed I NFRONT OF ME#the next day i watched quali at home and saw him get pole but i had to keep the dogs i couldn't leave#but otherwise i would have 100% driven there#to watch the race#Youtube
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All this time and I still don't understand why people hate Roman for his actions in Too Much Birthday. They made complete sense to me.
#succession#roman roy#why should the losing dog be nice or humble when he finally wins?#like i don't get the viceral anger at him there he's just doing what bullied people do when they finally win#but idk i don't tend to get Roman hate in general#he's a tramp but i love him
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i am having such a wonderful & lucky day & also i am limping everywhere
#foot injury be damned the sun is shining#halliwell did amazing at the vet and we had such a positive experience. the vet REALLY worked with his anxiety & also was cool#and she really trusted our bond and it was so cool he got pretty nervous but like didnât snap and once we tried some things based on what i#said he found soothing or familiar he let us check his breathing and heart and did a blood draw and got 2 shots!#& i got him ice cream after and he honestly seems like. idk! in a good mood despite the stress#heat set a TON of stuff#iâm vending on saturday and i actually feel prepared haha#i did good cleaning progress. more to do later but yknow#hung up some lost dog fliers and got a free rose vanilla coffee!#and set up my tattoo machine! so i will get to use it for the first time later!#oh and won some money on scratch offs. so i have like a pile of winning scratch offs rn
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i have had the most beautiful day today đ
#woke up at reasonable time day is bright sunnt beautiful and warm (rare) i wash my hair and blast music (immediate ego boost) i dress up#in fav fit do some makeup accesorise get my ass to campus bc whats the point of looking good if i don't see ppl ik AND WHO DO I SEE#but the girl i made out with at a party the other week and have been thinking about!! i was sadly sitting inside the hot stuffy full study#room bc all the outside tables wers taken & whaat did she do but appear after 5 minutes and invite me to sit at her table outside with her?#and whooo is now coming to my bday party in a couple weeks? and there was a puppy outside there the whole day i played with so much blessss#i miss having dogs. and i watched 3 and a half lectures which is the first time ive actually done schoolwork in ages lmao. & then i called#my long distance childhood bestie who's moving in w me in 3 weeks for then bumped into my other good friend at the supermarket#THEN my bestie whose also moving in next year told me her frjend would sell me some weed which is GREAT bc my plug fell of the face of the#earth 2 weeks ago :( so i got blazed w my OTHER bestie and played a literal perfect game of mario kart. win after win baby. bowser forever#jay rambles#drugs tw#i love using tumblr as a diary
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i hope i die before my father bc i want him to be pall bearer at my funeral so he can let me down one last time đ©
#just for old time's sake#one more for the road and all that#i actually feel a lot better already lol#i just really wanted to make this joke#i got over it quicker than i thought i would tbh#didn't even get that ill over it!!! which is a win for me!!! well done birb!!!!!#my expectations for the man were on the floor so obvs he had to dig a hole and tunnel under them lmaooo#but actually he's better now than he was ten years ago#he even has gay friends now!!! i was very shocked!!!! but it's true!!!!!#they walk their dogs together all the time!!!!! đ±đ±#he is such a confusing person lol#ah well what can u do???#ppl are just themselves aren't they???#nothing to be done for it đ€Łđ€Ł#birb still says#ignore meeee i'm just venting
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When I came out, I was SO scared I was gonna get disowned. I wrote a letter to my parents, sent it to their emails, put a physical copy on the counter, and left the house for a few hours to give them time. In that time I tried coffee for the first time, which was a dreadful idea, and got all jittery. I kept waiting for a text or something but nothing happened.
After a few hours, I didnât hear back from them so I went home. My parents were home and had stacked a bunch of groceries on top of the letter without opening it. They said âhiâ and I said âhiâ and went down stairs to the basement. I held my dog and panicked about what to do. My sister, who knew that I had written them a letter of great importance, told me they hadnât read it yet. She also told me she could ask them to do so. I consented to this and stayed in the basement. A few minutes later my dad knocked on the door and poked his soft smooth little nerd head in and said âhey buddyâ and I started crying so hard I almost vomited. He came over and gave me a BIG hug and said that it was gonna be OK, he was OK with this, he knew it must have been hard but he was here for me. He told me he and my mom had already talked years before they had me about how if they had to pick between their faith and their child theyâd pick their child. It was a very sweet moment. I came out to my mom later that evening and we were both bawling the whole time.
The day after I came out to my parents, I came out to my brother @inbabylontheywept at a Mexican restaurant and he took it like a champ. That evening my mom took me for a walk and looked almost angry - she said she wanted to make sure that I didnât use being a woman as an excuse to not go to grad school. I told her I wouldnât and she instantly looked relieved and happier.
My dad, on the other hand, seemed to struggle with it. He kept asking me if I had a boyfriend, and I told him I did not. He kept asking me if I wanted to go clothes shopping with him and I did not. He kept asking me if I would let him go to some of my shows, and I had NO idea what he was talking about.
Finally, 6 months after coming out, of awkward misgendering and questions that didnât make sense from my dad, he excitedly pokes his soft smooth little nerd head into my bedroom again and says âI found a movie about Your People.â My people. I was absolutely bewildered, but he was so excited and I knew he had been trying SO hard so I watched it with him. It was The Birdcage, and it was amazing. It also was revelatory in that I finally realized why my initially-supportive father seemed to be having such a hard time with my pronouns and stuff - he didnât know what the difference between trans and doing drag was. After the movie he again asked if I would invite him to one of my shows, and I said, âHey dad, you know how about half the world is women?â And he said âyeah,â and I said âWell, see, Iâm on that half now. Iâm not doing drag.â And it was like a switch flipped in his brain. He was like âomg thatâs so easy? I was so confused about what to call you when?â
Anyway, my parents are charming and my family has been so kind and patient with me, I like sharing the stories of my little wins with them.
#tgirl swag#mormon#ex mormon#exmormon#worm#gay#tgirl#trans humor#transfem#trans pride#trans stuff#transgender#transgirl#sillyposting#silly little guy#dad#stories#family#short story#story
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the way the chiefs are playing the next few games are going to be nasty, they're so lucky to be 3-0 rn like so fucking lucky
#do not even get me started on what's going on w mahomes n kelce#can this team get it together i beg#it is a true testament to how good they are they've played dog shite 3 games in a row#n each time have walked away w the win so there's that
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