#what basis are serving sizes even based on

[s0fter-sin]

since when are there four serves in a single frozen pizza???

[beepboopkek]

— Strip Starchess with Jing Yuan (Female Reader)

Including: Jing Yuan cw: afab!reader, pwp but barely, slight mention of reader having a size kink, unprotected p in v, first time writing a proper fic, first time writing smut (please send help), reader is a little bashful, overall its kind of a self-projection I guess. Jing Yuan is a little bastard (affectionate), stripping (who would've guessed), grammatical errors(I tried), Jing Yuan calls you pet names (dear, love), no use of y/n, light bondage ( reader gets their hands tied with a t-shirt nothing too bad), safe sane and consensual w/c: 3941 (might be a little off since I made a few edits in this post) a/n: I am so sorry for this I am going to die of cringe later but I needed this out of my brain so I made my best attempt at writing. There is a lot of stuff that is bad but I do not have the energy or patience to do it so, you have been warned, this is a first-time smut from an inexperienced writer whose first language isn't english :3 hope someone out there likes this

You were bored.

Extremely bored.

Jing Yuan had promised you he’d come home on time so that the two of you could enjoy dinner together. You had something fun planned for the evening for the two of you. Something you were excited to try out.

One problem though, there were still no signs of your boyfriend’s arrival.

You sent him a few messages asking him where he was but to no avail, you knew for a fact he wouldn’t be able to respond anyway.

The sound of a door opening broke you out of your thoughts as you turned around and were met with an apologetic soft smile on Jing Yuan’s face.

“Yu.”

“My Love.”

You huffed at him in annoyance, realising what he was trying to do. He always knew how to soften you up.

“You’re late.” You said as you watched him unstrap his boots and place them near the shoe rack before he turned to look at you.

“I apologize, I overslept in the afternoon and had to compensate as a result.” Jing Yuan gave you a pitiful look.

“Regardless, I am here now,” He walked over to where you were seated and leaned down to place a chaste kiss on your head. “And I’d love to eat what my dear has cooked for me.”

You rolled your eyes at him a little and turned towards the table again as he took his seat opposite to you. You began eating in silence while Jing Yuan served himself some of the food you’d made.

“C’mon, don’t be like that.” He spoke suddenly as you focused on eating and ignoring him.

“Be like what? I didn’t do anything.” You huffed back to him again while continuing to look at your food when you suddenly heard the sound of a chair being dragged across the floor, you looked up, only to be met with your boyfriend’s amber eyes boring into yours.

“What can I do to make it up to you?”

You grumbled something with your mouth full.

“I didn’t catch that, love.”

You gulped down your food, 

“I said, play Starchess with me”

“Do we not play Starchess on a regular basis already?”

“We do, yes, but I found a new variation of the game that I thought would be fun to try out. Only if youre up for it, though.” You made eye contact with him again as his eyebrow shot up in surprise.

He leaned in on the table and rested his head on the palm of his hand as he tilted his head lazily.

“Go on.”

Your confidence and annoyance all but vanished this exact second, you really hadn’t expected him to be this interested and knowing him , he probably already has an idea simply based off of the tone of your voice.

“...Nevermind.” You looked away, blushing as Jing Yuan continued to watch in lazed amusement.

“Is it-”

“Yes it’s Strip Starchess, okay? I thought it would be fun to play.” You blurted out as your ears turned a light shade of red.

“I was going to say Blitz Starchess.”

Your eyes widened in horror as you turned back to look at Jing Yuan who was now miserably failing at holding back his laughter as his shoulders shook silently and he pressed his lips together.

“I hate you.”

Jing Yuan laughed and you pouted.

“I didn’t do anything, though?”

“You know exactly what you're doing, Yu.”

Jing Yuan smiled apologetically once again as you pouted while avoiding eye contact with him. He sighed fondly and picked up his chopsticks again.

“Strip Starchess, hm? Let’s finish dinner and begin.”

You huffed again and turned back to your food and soon enough, Jing Yuan started some casual conversation and the whole ordeal was pushed to the back of your mind.

. . .That was until after you both finished eating and cleaning up.

Shit.

You suddenly had very important things to do in your library so you quietly started walking towards it, hoping Jing Yuan had all but forgotten about your earlier conversation. Just as you were about to open the door, a familiar voice called out from behind you,

"Dear?" 

You slowly turned around, trying not to look like you were caught committing a crime.

"...Yes?"

"Where would you like to play? I think the living room would be best since it is rather spacious. We can close the curtains but,"

Jing Yuan paused as he looked towards the box in his hands and back to you,

"I'm saying that while assuming that we will be taking off our clothes sooner or later. Am I wrong?" 

He smiled innocently. This bastard knew exactly what he was doing.

"... Fine, let's go to the living room then, I'll explain the rules to you." 

Jing Yuan hummed pleasantly as he walked behind you, setting the board down onto the hard wooden flooring as the both of you sat down facing each other. 

He opened up the box and set up the game and looked at you expectantly.

There was no backing out now, so you might as well give it your best.

"It's in the name, you strip when you lose a pawn." 

"Strip entirely? Or just an article of clothing?"

"You know exactly what I mean."

You gave an exasperated sigh as you stared at him with the grumpiest expression you could muster.

"I'm afraid I don't, love."

He gave you a cat-like smile as he patiently waited for you to explain.

"...Only a piece of clothing. The one who has the most clothes off at the end of the game is the loser,"

You made yourself comfortable, you need your initial confidence back desperately.

"We'll play 3 games and see who wins. I won't be going easy on you."

You smiled at him mischievously as he chuckled and re-adjusted his seating position before looking right into your eyes.

"Very well then, let the games begin." 

You focused your eyes on the board and played your first move, positioning the soldier pawn in front of your king 2 steps ahead.

Jing Yuan’s eyes lit up as he countered it by moving the same piece on his side. He knew exactly how you were going to play and he was going to ensure he won.

The game progressed and you eventually lost your first pawn, you sighed in annoyance at the realization as you looked up to see your boyfriend with his cat-like smile and of course, he had the most innocent look on his face.

Damnit.

You sighed reluctantly as you cursed him under your breath and removed your jacket.

“Happy?” You deadpanned at him.

“Very much so. Don’t be upset, you still have a chance to win.” He smirked lazily as he waited for you to play your turn

You were more cautious now, not letting him take any of your pawns when you realized you had a safe opening to take his pawn!

You took the chance and took his soldier with your bishop. Looking up at him in triumph.

He smiled back at you casually as he raised his hands in surrender,

“You got me there,”

You watchedn him in anticipation as your mouth watered a little, sure you’d been living together for a few months now but, nothing beat seeing Jing Yuan’s body.

He place his hand on his shoulder guard and removed it before smiling at you pleasantly again.

You blinked once.

Twice.

Scanning him to see if he removed anything else while you were day-dreaming.

Nope, nothing.

"I said one piece of clothing, your shoulder brace doesn't count as one." 

"You never specified if accessories were also counted."

You huffed at him, "You never asked!" 

"I don't recall having to ask, I gave you the chance to explain everything to me." He smiled innocently again.

He was right. 

He knew he was and continued to play his next move.

Bastard.

Suddenly, it dawned on you that he was still in his armor and work uniform, meaning it would take at least 15 individual games of Starchess to get even the first layer off of him. Your eyes widened in realization as he looked at you and stifled his laughter.

Well, you certainly weren't in your work clothes and barely had anything on in the first place but you might have a few accessories on your person if you looked hard enough.

Two can play that game.

The game continued as you tried your best to defend your pieces from his attacks but he was too good… much to your displeasure.

By the end of the first game, Jing Yuan barely looked any different from how he was when he entered your shared home while you had to remove your own rings and piercings, putting them away in a corner neatly as to not lose them.

Jing Yuan won the first game by the rules of normal Starchess and the two of began your second round.

You were determined, but so was he.

Time passed rather quickly as you watched your boyfriend remove more accessories and you really wondered how he was able to walk or even fight with that much on his body.

You shook your head. Now's not the time for distractions.

The game progressed as you watched your pawns get taken one by one.

Rook, Bishop, a couple of soldiers and the list went on.

…You realized very late that you were going to lose.

You've never beat him in a game of starches, partially because he sneaks away your pieces but also because he's genuinely skilled at playing the game.

You were down to your last game, Jing Yuan in his shirt and pants along with some random trinkets of his uniform that you didn't even know the purpose of, you, however, were a different story.

You'd managed to get down just to your t-shirt and panties, shivering a little in both anticipation and the chill of the night.

“Do you need a blanket? You won't have anything to cover you soon enough, I'd hate to get you sick, dear.” Jing Yuan looked at you lazily.

Bastard.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

“I'm good. This is the last game and by the look of it, you've lost more pieces than I have.”

He made a content noise in the back of his throat as if agreeing with you before looking down at the board and smiling.

“I'm afraid you are correct, I admire your confidence in the face of calamity. However,”

He moved his bishop in line with your king.

“Checkmate.” 

You glanced around the board, trying to find an escape route but there were none. 

There was no denying it, you had lost the third game as well.

But the rules were about clothes, you looked up at him and back at yourself.

“. . . Fuck.”

You sighed, reluctantly admitting defeat.

“Alright , alright. You win the 3 games and the whole game considering you have more layers on you than I do.” 

Jing Yuan smiled in amusement as he crossed his arms and tilted his head slightly,

“So, what's my reward for winning?” 

You were already packing up the board as you looked at him with a huff and stood up.

“I'll let you nap in the afternoon more tomorrow, that's your reward.” 

But before you could move your half naked self away, Jing Yuan moved closer and swiftly knocked your knees back so you toppled down onto him.

“Jing Yuan! I almost knocked the board on your head!”

You had wrapped your arms around his neck, scared to lose balance and plop onto the floor if he were to drop you.

“I'm interested in another reward.”

“What?”

“I'm the winner so isn't it natural I get to pick my reward? Besides, no proper terms were set for it when you explained the rules to me.”

“You little shit, you knew this was going to happen.”

“Dear, I am the divine foresight for a reason.” 

He chuckled as his hands slowly moved down your torso and to the hem of your t-shirt. 

He grasped the hem as he leaned into your body and spoke lowly in your ear

“Of course, if you don't want this, we could just revert to my original reward.” 

His hold on you was firm but gentle, indicating that he'd let you go if you wanted him to.

“But, something about the way you're trembling in my hold tells me you don't want to stop, do you?” 

Your breath was coming out in shaky puffs now. You simply looked away in embarrassment before he pressed himself closer to you, you could feel the warmth of his body through the clothes he was wearing.

“Answer me.” 

“. . . I don't want you to stop” 

He smiled against your ears and you swear if he had a tail it would be swishing around in excitement by now.

“That wasn't so hard, was it?” 

Kissing the red shell of your ear he moved your face towards him and kissed you deeply before pressing his forehead to yours.

“Now, allow me to claim my reward.”

He peppered kisses along your jaw as his hands finally, finally took your t-shirt up to your neck as you raised your arms to help him get it off.

You were down to your panties and bra now, coincidentally, you were wearing one of his favourite sets’.

His kisses continued downward, unbuckling your bra with one hand while the other appreciatively squeezed around your body.

He leaned down on your chest, taking a nipple into his mouth as his other hand tweaked with the other and you gasped, sparks of pleasure shooting up your spine.

Your hands immediately found purchase in his soft hair as you closed your eyes and whispered his name.

Jing Yuan always , always made sure to lather extra attention to your chest, you never understood why but it had now become a sensitive spot for you.

He kissed and licked around your nipples, leaving little bites in between so that he can see them in the morning and fuck you all over again.

Deciding he'd done enough to your chest (for now) he moved his attention downwards, chuckling breathlessly at the small wet patch on your panties.

His large hand slid down as he started moving his finger up and down on your panties, making the wet patch grow bigger.

“You call me a bastard and yet have the nerve to be this wet for me, hm?” 

“S-Shut up.” 

You panted as your brain became fuzzy and warm, not being able to think of anything else except Jing Yuan touching you.

He smirked as he added pressure with his finger on exactly where your clit is and you gasped loudly. The fabric of your panties providing a weird but not unwelcome feeling.

“Do you think you can cum just from this alone?”

“I don't k-”

You cut yourself off with a loud moan as he pinched your clit and rubbed it.

“You don't know? Well, that's too bad. We'll just have to find out it seems, hm?”

You were gasping for air and moaning loudly at this point, thrashing and tugging at Jing Yuan’s hair like your life depended on it.

“I'm feeling nicer today, let's take this off, dear.” 

He tugged at your panties and your hazy mind cleared for a second 

“Jing Yuan! Don't I-”

A loud ripping sound echoed through the room as you stared in horror at the shredded remains of your panties but before you could utter a word, Jing Yuan kissed you and simultaneously continued to make circles around your clit.

You weakly slammed your fisted hands onto the hard planes of his chest but to no avail, he wasn't going to let up.

He continued flicking your clit at a faster pace before speaking into your ear.

“Be a good girl and cum for me”

You moaned as you clenched his (now crumpled) white shirt in your hands as your eyes rolled back and your orgasm flooded over your body in waves.

The general continued to make slow and gentle circles on your clit as you got down from your high, peppering your body with kisses and bites everywhere.

You were still breathing heavily when you regained your senses again.

“So, my hypothesis was correct.” 

“You're gonna pay for that, Yu.”.

You said, not sure if youre referring to the torn panties or the fact that him massaging your clit was enough to get you to cum.

“Of course I will, and any other matching set you like so I can rip them all off of your body.” 

His voice was so calm while speaking you'd almost think he was unaffected by the situation but that was far from the truth, sitting on his lap gave away that he was extremely hard underneath you.

He kissed you again, gently this time as he pulled back and bore his eye into yours.

“Do you want to continue?” 

You didn't respond, only leaning in to kiss him before bringing your hands to the collar of his shirt and unbuttoning it.

“I'm not the only one that's going to be naked here.” 

He helped you take off his whole shirt, watching you as you admired his sculpted and scarred torso. 

“Turn around for me, love.”

You did as you were told, sitting in his lap with your back against his chest.

His hands suddenly came up on you again, going downwards to your pussy as he outlined your lips. Pressing gently on the soft flesh.

Your hands immediately found purchase on top of his much bigger ones, your breathing picking up again.

He inserted two fingers in you, pushing them in and out and curling them in just the right spot, hitting your already frayed nerves and stretching you open for him. Keeping the rhythm of his fingers up, slowly getting you towards the edge again when suddenly,

You were left empty as Jing Yuan retracted his hand and wiped it onto his pants as he unzipped them, before hooking both his hands under your plush thighs and lifting your slit above his cock.

“Tell me if you need a break.”

Before you could respond, he was already impaling you on his cock, pushing you down slowly as you reached back with your hands and grabbed his neck while arching your back.

“F-Fuck- too much-”

“You can take it, I know you can.”

He whispered breathlessly as he continued pushing you down until you met the base of his cock.

“There we go.”

Jing Yuan waited for you to adjust while rubbing gentle circles on your clit, watching intently as you fought to gain back your breath.

You were struggling at this point, mind in a haze at the feeling of being so full. Not knowing where to place your hands you blurted our the first coherent thought that came to your mind.

“. . .Tie my hands, please.”

Now it was the general’s turn to be surprised, you were not one to beg usually. He smiled coyly as he grabbed your discarded t-shirt and rolled it up to form a makeshift knot.

“If i was aware we were going to this tonight, I wouldve prepared more.”

You pushed your hands out together in front of you impatiently, just wanting to move but not trusting your shaking legs to carry through.

Jing Yuan kissed around your ears again started working on binding your hands immediately. Securing it as tight as he could, he tugged on it before pecking you on the cheek.

“There. Is that better?”

“Yes.”

You were fully panting now, subtly grinding yourself on his cock.

Jing yuan took it as his cue to move and hooked his hands under your thighs again before lifting you off his cock.

The split second where you were left empty was enough for you to whine. He wasn’t a cruel lover, though, he thrusted back in, filling you instantly.

He kept the tempo of fast but deep strokes and before long you could feel your second orgasm approaching.

Suddenly, there was a change as he pushed you down onto the wooden floor face first and ass up, the angle making him reach in different areas.

Your tied hands were above your head as you got rubbed on the floor like a mop cloth from his powerful thrusts. Jing Yuan bent over and draped his larger frame over your back, holding down your shaking hands with one of his own and thrusting faster.

“Come on, come for me.”

He whispered into your ear, again, reaching his other hand down to play with your clit.

And that's all it took for you to orgasm, releasing over his cock as he kept his pace.

For a few seconds, you blanked out completely, caught up in the haze of your orgasm that you didn't even notice Jing Yuan continuing,

That was until you were brought back to reality by a hit of overstimulation, tears already collecting at your lashes as the pleasure soared through your entire body.

“Y-Yu-”

“Just a little more.”

He continued rubbing fast circles over your clit and you could feel the tendrils of your third orgasm creeping up on you as you clenched around him hard.

It pierced through you just as your boyfriend finally released inside you, hot liquid filling you up and you felt so full.

Jing Yuan panted as he rested some of his body weight on you, essentially pinning you in place and having no way to move. Just the way you like it.

He grabbed your hips with both his hands as he gently thrusted a few times to get the last few seconds of pleasure in, wrecking your already overstimulated pussy.

“. . . I think my reward is incomplete.” He said after a few beats of silence.

“Absolutely not.” 

Jing Yuan laughed breathlessly as he pulled you back onto his lap and rested himself against the sofa, wrapping his hands around your waist and putting his head on your shoulder.

The both of you relished in the afterglow for a bit with him still stuffed inside you, just enjoying and soaking each other’s presence, you were the first to speak.

“Horny bastard, you really piledrived me on the floor of our living room.” You laughed while pecking at his cheeks.

“Me? I’m the horny one now? You were the one that suggested this game in the first place!”

Jing Yuan feigned hurt as he tightened his hold on you, eyeing you cheekily as your ears turned red.

“I didn’t proposition sex! It was a game to-”

“To what? Play house with each other?” Jing Yuan asked in an amused tone before continuing,

“You wanted it to end like this, didn’t you?”

“Not on the goddamn floor! I’m gonna have bruises from this tomorrow, I hope you're happy.”

You pouted and held your (still bound) hands close to your chest, hearing Jing Yuan snicker and feeling his chest shake.

“I’ll give you a massage right now, on the bed this time, to make up for it”

“And then what? Escalate it into having sex again? I need to walk tomorrow, Yu.”

“You know me too well.”

You looked at him into his eyes and he simply gave you a crooked smile

“Untie my hands, we need to clean up and get to bed”

“Hmm… How about I let you go now and you let me enjoy my reward in the shower again?”

You sighed before nodding in acceptance, you weren’t going to feel your legs tomorrow.

This is the price you pay for provoking the sleeping lion.

“Horny bastard.”

[sunlightmurdock]

The Odyssey | 0.4 | Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

Previous | Next | Masterlist

Bradley wakes up beside you, tensions boil over.

Warnings: enemies to lovers, power imbalance (professor / student relationship), age gap (22 / 33), will be smut, virgin reader, swearing, infidelity, bickering and teasing through the chapter, mlre warnings to be added on a chapter by chapter basis. 18+ minors dni, wc 4.6k

…

Turning onto his side reminds him that he’s not at home. His cheek meets the edge of the mattress, his arm already hanging freely off of it. He groans softly, then clears his throat, but otherwise makes no effort to move.

Your fingers curl and then uncurl, fiddling with the edge of the bedsheet. You’ve been up for twenty minutes now, staring at the man in the bed opposite you. He has kicked the covers off at some point in the night, discarded his belt too. His khaki shorts are still on, just unbuttoned for comfort.

He’s laying on his front, one arm bent and tucked under his pillow to support his head. Ashamedly, your eyes keep wandering back to the same thing. That long, even line down the stretch of his back. Starting at the waistband of the shorts, extending up along a plain of tanned, freckled skin, onto broad, thick shoulders. Before this, you’ve never thought about what Professor Bradshaw had looked like under those one-size too big button up shirts he wears.

Even his breathing is just so heavy.

Routinely, he’ll shift, pressing his face into the pillow and rocking his hips a little to try to find comfort again. Behind you, the sun has risen, casting a golden shadow over half of the lake, and, incidentally, Bradley too. Before now, you’ve never noticed quite how many freckles he has.

Finally, reminding himself that he’s got a hungover nineteen year old to go and reprimand, he forces himself to blink a few times. After opening his eyes for the first time, he’s somewhat aware of your presence. It isn’t until maybe the third blink that he finally draws his brows together, lifts his head and squints at you.

You stare back at him as he mumbles your name, his voice deep and gruff from a night of sleeping with his lips slightly parted.

“Are you watching me sleep?” He pushes himself up a little more, turning so that he’s sitting up in bed. Curls a mess, still trying to blink the sleep out of his eyes, rolling those thick shoulders to stretch them.

“We need to talk.”

“Jesus Christ,” He scoffs, pressing the base of his palm into his eye socket in an attempt to wipe the blur from his vision. “Can you let me wake up first?”

It’s already dawning on him that he made a dumb decision in falling into this bed last night. He probably shouldn’t have left Luke alone with Robin. Even if he had, he shouldn’t have let himself into your room. Natasha would’ve gotten him a different room in a heartbeat. He had just been so exhausted, and your door was right there.

“You were in the military?” It wasn’t what the topic of conversation was supposed to be about, you’ve just never noticed that silver-balled chain dangling around his neck before. Bradley glances down at the tags resting against his bare chest and rubs at his eye again.

“Navy, for a bit.” He tells you, the sleep starting to clear from his voice. Six years, actually. He shipped out at eighteen and came back a man.

“Did you go to Vietnam?” That’s always the question that follows, and when you’re a man who turned eighteen in 1971, there’s usually one answer.

He turns his head and looks across at you, “Only for a couple months.” Finally, he takes note of his half awake state and lifts a hand to try to tame his curls. Twisting them apart and brushing them back off of his face. “Why are we talking about the Navy?”

“Because I didn’t know that you served,” You reply, lifting your hands away from the covers and instead toying with your nightgown. Bradley watches your hands fiddle in the lemon coloured material, thinking back to the conversation he had had with Luke. He’d been expecting something uglier. It’s old-fashioned, but he doesn’t hate it. “You just don’t seem like the type—“

“I’m not.” Bradley interrupts you. He pushes himself up from the twin bed and stands straight, stretching his arms above his head and craning his neck from side to side.

He looks bigger without his clothes on. All three buttons on his shorts popped open revealing the waistband of white boxers inside. A steady trail of brown hair extending from his bellybutton to that waistband, stretching from the middle of his chest across his pecs. His biceps flexing as he tucks his arms behind his head.

“Do I have something on my face?” It’s more of a groan as he stretches out again, he peeks his eyes open to remind you that you’re staring at him.

“You have a lot of nerve,” You push yourself up swiftly. Here we go. He raises his eyebrows, intrigued but far from intimidated. You walk closer, barefoot and dressed in that cute little nightie. “First you let yourself in here and pass out next to me—“

“I was halfway across the room and in a different bed, it wasn’t—“

“Then,” You interrupt, talking louder to him, “You keep me up with your snoring—“

“I don’t snore.” He tries, still calm as you stomp around the twin bed to get to him, poking your index finger into his toned chest.

“And don’t act like I don’t know what you did last night, Bradshaw. One phone call and I can have you fired.”

Bradley’s lips quirk at the fact you think you have that power, but his brows knit together. “What do you think I did?”

“You! And Natasha!”

“Are friends, yes.” He’s talking down to you, slow and soft like you’re stupid. You smack his chest with the base of your palm, then point at him again. He looks down at the digit pressing into his skin, then back at you seriously.

“Were all over each other on the balcony last night!” You correct him. He glances down at your finger on his skin once again. You consider stepping back a little so that you don’t have to look up at him quite as much, but stay where you are.

He lifts his hand and wraps it over the top of yours, taking it away from his skin, holding it just a little too tight. “I don’t know what you think you saw, or what you think you know, but I can assure you that whatever it is, won’t get me fired.”

“She’s married! Do you have no respect for her marriage, if not her as a person?”

He stares at you. You can see it in his face that he’s trying not to smile. He looks down at your hand in his and examines your engagement ring. It’s a pretty sizeable rock on that band, but that’s no surprise.

“I respect Natasha,” Bradley decides, lifting those big brown eyes to look at your face again. “Enough to know that she's a grown up and can make her own decisions.”

He lets go of your hand and reaches for the buttons on his shorts. Your gaze falls to track the movement of his hands. He buttons them slowly, watching you watch him.

“If the Dean knew that you were—“

“Are you going to tell him?” Bradley prompts, stepping invasively closer to you. His brows seem to be permanently drawn together when he’s talking to you. Your neck leans back further so that you can keep your eyes on his face. “If I go home, so do you. Meaning you don’t graduate, genius. How’s your Dad going to take that one?”

Your eyes widen and then narrow.

“It’s no wonder that all Natasha wants you for is sex — I don’t think that any woman could put up with you for longer than that.” You decide. He stares back at you, lips quirking to let you know that he’s going to be harsh before he even speaks.

“And what would you know about sex?”

He knows. He watches you react to his words try to piece together who told him or why he thinks it’s acceptable to mock you for it. Truthfully, Zoey had drunkenly giggled it last night. He was standing behind her with her hair scooped messily into a ponytail, averting his gaze as she puked into the toilet, when she had sat back and wiped her mouth.

“Hey, Bradley, did you hear that your — star pupil hasn’t even fucked her own fiancée? — She’s — a virgin.” Zoey had hiccuped, grinning amusedly.

You’re quiet for long enough that he stands there and readies himself for you to try to hit him, he knows better than to leave himself open to you.

Then, you exhale slowly and stand up a little straighter, like that makes any difference in the way he stands over you.

“You’re going to start tutoring me, starting tomorrow.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because if there’s any chance that I’m not going to pass this class then I’ll just send the both of us home today, I swear to god.” Your fists ball at your sides. He stares back at you, understanding your rationale for maybe the first time since he met you. “Either you make sure I pass, so this whole circus is worth it — or we’re both fucked.”

His lips quirk. That’s the first time he’s heard you swear. Sounds awfully grown up spilling from your lips like that. He gives you a quick once over, trailing his gaze from your bare feet to the way your lips are pursed at him.

“I’m not going to do the work for you.” He decides. If there was enough room between you, he might’ve crossed his arms over his chest. If it wasn’t so hot from the window being open and the baking morning sun creeping in through the window, he might have stayed longer. His hand cups your waist as he pushes you out of his way and steps around you. “Get Pasquale to give you his book, read chapters two and three before tomorrow.”

And with that, he leaves your room. His belt, shirt and shoes remain on your floor. He passes Robin in the hallway, wearing one of Luke’s striped t-shirts, ignores her completely and swings the door to his own room open.

Robin winces at the sound of Bradley yelling as she renters her own room. She stops, her gaze falling down to the unmade bed and Bradley’s belt, shirt and shoes on the floor. She lifts her gaze to look at you. You scowl instantly.

“Got sick of waiting, huh?” Robin’s tone is dripping with mockery as she steps past you, barefoot and not wearing a single item of her own clothing.

You’re tempted, then for the first time, to shove her, but don’t. You let her walk past, but holding your tongue is too much to ask.

“Not all of us are as easy as you.” You remind her

“Prude.” She spits, shooting you a venomous look over her love-bitten shoulder. She doesn’t even have time to turn before you lurch forwards and grab a handful of her hair, tearing her backwards.

Lake Como begins to rise, peaceful and quiet outside of the open window. It’s going to be a beautiful day. Golden rays of sunlight across the still water of the lake, a gentle breeze and a freshness in the air.

Downstairs, from the breakfast patio, Natasha sips on her espresso as Bradley pulls the two of you off of each other. His voice carries through the valley, disrupting her breakfast guests as he reprimands the two of you for your childish behavior.

Your punishment is to be exactly where he can see and hear you, for the rest of the day. At ten, sharp, you sit on his left while Robin sits on his right. All three of you looking equally miserable.

You’re being spoken to as a group by an older man, he’s grey all over and sun-spotted, but you can tell he would have been handsome in his day. He’s telling you all about Lake Como’s history.

“In 49 BC Como town came into its own under the rule of Julius Caesar,” His accent is thick but his English is good, he has grown around the tourists and knows exactly how to talk to them. “Who populated the town with its first 5,000 inhabitants and named the lake Larius. Como itself was known as Novum Comum and played host to famous authors such as Pliny the Elder and Pliny the Younger during this time.”

Bradley breaks his gaze to scan across his students quickly. Abigail is taking notes, an Italian dictionary poking out of the top of her backpack with various sticky notes poking out of it. Luke’s enthralled, watching intently with his lips parted. You’re looking down. He leans forwards and cranes his neck to get a better look at you. You’re sitting up straight, frowning down at Pasquale’s book.

More notably, the artwork on the left page. It’s a Florentine painting from the sixteenth century of two women. Nobles, both of them. One of them’s sprawled out across a bed, her undergarments bunched, breasts exposed. Her modesty would be too, if it wasn’t for the second woman with her face buried between the gasping woman’s legs. He studies your expression, unimpressed by how you’re scowling at the work instead of just reading.

Reaching over two students, he taps harshly on the back of your head and points towards the front, “Pay attention.”

You look up quickly and snap the book closed. Bradley stares at you. You stare forwards, trying to focus on the lecture after what you had just been reading. You’re certain that if your father had bothered to look over the syllabus, he wouldn’t have cared so much about you taking this class.

“The stunning scenery also attracted artists such as Byron, Wordsworth and Shelley, acting as a muse to many poems including ‘The Daisy’ by Tennyson and ‘Cadenabbia’ by Longfellow.”

The furthest thing from your mind, truthfully, is Alfred Tennyson. If you were really being honest, the one thing on your mind is the image of Bradley standing at the front of the hall, reading aloud what you had just read. Hearing the words pour off of his tongue. Maybe during a morning lecture, where his voice would have been gruff and deep like you had heard this morning.

The lecture continues on and, as much as Bradley wishes he could pay attention, he glances across at you periodically. You’re still making that face. Like a kid with their hand caught in the cookie jar. He doesn’t get it, nor does he get you — you’re acting like the required reading for his class is porn. Turning his gaze to the water behind Guiliano’s lecture, he considers that for you it probably is.

He almost scoffs at the idea. Some sixteenth century painting being radical is such a foreign idea to him. He thinks of being eighteen, and impressed by the nude pictures on lighters and playing cards in the Navy. Impressed by the women he met at ports who liked the look of his uniform. Impressed by Natasha and everything she had taught him.

By the time it came to seeing that painting, calling it explicit was far from his mind.

“Great composers like Liszt and Verdi were also inspired by the lake. Many poems have been written about Lake Como both historically and more recently, but it’s not hard to see why the unrivalled beauty of the lake would inspire even the most amateur to put pen to paper.” Breeze carries forwards and sends Guiliano’s hair brushing back off of his forehead as he speaks. Bradley catches you turn out of the corner of his eye and looks. Meeting his gaze, you swallow and look quickly back to the water.

The morning passes slowly, it feels like Bradley’s eyes are burning into your back but maybe that’s just the warming sun. Lunch is quick, Bradley sits with Natasha and her husband. Her hand sits on top of her husband’s, diamond sparkling in the light.

Bradley stares at it as he eats his salad. The sapphire he had given her half a decade ago was prettier with her skin tone, but that’s at the bottom of the Mediterranean now.

After that, more lectures — then free time around the lake. This time, the students have organized to take a trip up to one of the towns further along the lake driven by Pasquale.

It’s less humiliating that you haven’t been invited now, because at least you’ve got the excuse of being stuck in the library of the hotel with Bradley all afternoon.

Gaze focused down, you watch the way Bradley scrawls across the page, his handwriting legible but not exactly neat. His hand’s just gripping the pen, but you can’t help but think of the way it had curled into her hair. Being six years old and having your ponytail pulled on the playground feels far from this.

You’ve been at this for a while, and it’s clear that you’re both equally irritated by each other. Slamming the pen down, he takes one look at your face and knows you’re about to ask him if he’s sure this translation that he has given you even makes sense.

“Don’t.”

You close your mouth, scowling across at him. He leans across the table and points towards the bottom of the dictionary, where a brief explanation of the Latin term you’re looking for exists.

“Stop getting yourself so mad,” He tells you calmly, shaking his head. “You’re bad at it because you don’t practice. Take a breath, think about it. It’s going to get easier.”

That’s the first nice thing he has said to you since you got here. You press your lips together, sigh, and then wet them with your tongue, trying to focus. He studies you from across the desk, each of you soaked in warm afternoon sunlight, the floor length windows open, the breeze soft. There’s an artificial smell of citrus in here.

You look back down to the work and exhale softly. Your chest rises and falls, the pale blue of your shirt catching his eye, just briefly.

“So, you didn’t like chapter two of the book, huh?” Maybe he thinks that this is an icebreaker of sorts. Your gaze is heavy, lifting slowly from your work to stare at him. He feels the need to elaborate instantly. “The painting.”

Suddenly the translation of the word fortuitous is a lot more interesting than it had been. Bradley taps his fingers against the desk as you avoid the discomfort of meeting his gaze.

“I just mean—“

“I don’t see why it should be in an academic text.” You say simply. He can tell that his question has annoyed you, but most things he says annoy you, so he moves swiftly on.

There’s a long pause between the two of you.

“Okay, you should know that I’m asking this seriously — so don’t bite my head off,” Bradley rests his palms flat on the aged, rust coloured wood, then leans forwards. His face is serious, his eyes big and round. “But, do you even know what my class is called?”

Sunlight peeking in from behind his shoulder, bathing the room and everything in it in a honeyed gold. The heat from the day starting to ebb away, a breeze from across the lake blowing at the curtains just slightly. No birds, no bustle outside — everyone’s either at dinner or getting ready for dinner. Everything in this valley is calm except you.

“Yes,” You bite, scowling across at him from over the top of the far too detailed painting in front of you. “Classics. You keep saying it.”

“Yeah, classics is the subject. But do you know what my class — the class that you picked, and enrolled in, is called?” Bradley asks slowly, like he’s just trying to be patronizing.

“It’s about Roman literature.” You answer, knowing that you’ve failed to produce a title, but are along the right track anyway.

“My class is called ‘Sexuality in Roman Culture and Literature’,” Bradley shares finally. You sit across from him, blank-faced. He taps the table softly, staring back at you, enjoying this probably a little bit too much. “That’s why the book is so ‘graphic’.”

Catherine — your maid-of-fucking-honour — enrolled you in a class on sex. You’re going to murder her. This cruel joke might have been funny if it hadn’t cost you your summer.

“But, then again, you would know that if you had bothered—“

“Oh my god, will you shut up about my attendance?” You grumble, slamming your pencil down onto the table. He stares at you, unimpressed and clearly biting his tongue. “We both know I’m here for credits and not because I care about the way people had sex a couple hundred years ago. Just do what they pay you to do and teach.”

Bradley’s brows draw together as he leans closer, his frame dwarfing the table. There’s a lingering silence as he stares across at you.

“Excuse me?”

“Look, I just—“

“No,” Bradley holds a hand up and pushes himself up from his seat. Standing, the table seems even smaller. You feel even smaller, tipping your head back to look up at him. His eyes darken as he squints. “You either learn to watch your mouth around me or you head home and admit that you fucking failed. You hear me?”

You stare up at him, swallowing thickly as shame burns through you. The smell of dust hurts your nose, the warm, dust-covered lights make your eyes tired. You want to go home.

“Tell me that you understand. In Latin.”

Another beat of silence. The look on your face tells you that he’s far from joking. Sighing quietly, he watches as you bow your head and open the dictionary.

He gives you a moment, just hulking over you as you search for the right term. Finally, you lift your gaze and spit it out, quietly. He glances down at the page.

“Work on your grammar.” Bradley tells you, slowly relaxing back down into his seat and tucking it in. “I’m going to give you a play. I want you to read it, I think it’ll help you with some context clues.”

Just like that. He relaxes — well, relaxes as much as you’ve ever seen him be capable of — again.

You exhale. Without realizing, you had been holding on to that one breath the entire time. Your gaze drops, falling down to his rolled up sleeves, the veins snaking out from under the white linen and down across the backs of his hands.

You wonder if Natasha gets him wound up like this.

The second that the thought crosses your mind, you squash it. Staring wide-eyed at the page in front of you, you’re at war with your mind. And he’s just sitting there, head leaned back, palms flat, staring at the ceiling. He has no fucking idea.

Staring at the ceiling is truly the only way forward. He can’t stand another minute of having to watch your lips purse when you’re staring at him.

It’s so difficult, trying not to hold something that you don’t even remember against you. He knows how blacked out you were that night, you barely remembered your own damn name.

He remembers that stupid, blue fucking dress. It came in around the waist and had these thin straps, more of a powder blue than any kind of stronger color. He remembers the snow on his car windshield, still falling. He remembers his heaters up as high as they would go and his coat around your shoulders.

Finding you sitting on the side of the road, in the fucking snow, and bundling you into his car, trying to keep you awake.

And then, the two of you sitting outside of your childhood home and your freezing cold hands wrapping around his palm, pleading with him not to make you go inside. He had only seen you a handful of times at this point, but he was sure you weren’t a bad kid. You just had shitty friends.

He lifts his gaze now and studies you as you card through the information before you. Lips pursed.

“You can’t sit in my car all night, kid.” Bradley said quietly, watching you like you were something foreign to him. You blinked back, saying nothing, but looking so sad.

“I just — please don’t make me go in there.” Your voice trembled. Maybe from exhaustion, mostly from fear. Bradley knew what fear sounded like. His face creased with concern, but he hadn’t budged. You frowned at him, eyes wide and pleading, “Please.”

You must have been able to tell on his face that he was about to disagree with you. You sat forwards, reaching out to rest your manicured palm against his thigh. His gaze hadn’t faltered from your face. He had been here before, with love sick girls who seemed to think he was going to be their saving grace.

He was nicer about it back then. He was trying to be nice to you. With your smudged mascara and your missing boyfriend and your quivering bottom lip. He should’ve kicked you out of that damn car and marched you inside right then. You were still too drunk to sit still, swaying just slightly — he wanted to give you a minute to collect yourself before your parents saw you at least.

He sat there for a moment, just trying to think about what to do with you. And then, seeming to think that this would get you your way, you had sat up and you’d kissed him. Turned your head twenty degrees to the left, lips just slightly parted, pressing softly into his. Pillowy and purposeful.

He swallows, glancing down at the page in front of him. God, he wishes you hadn’t done that. But, he can’t help but wonder where that odd little impulse had come from. What had driven that shivering girl to drive forwards and kiss him, clinging onto his shirt like it was some kind of life preserver — and where was she now?

Certainly not sitting in front of him and too timid to look at a painting.

You continue on with your studies, pretending like you aren’t thinking about him back in that lecture hall, his voice dripping like honey as he tells you every intricacy that that painting detailed.

Bradley crosses his arms over his chest and looks up at the details chiseled into the ceiling. He can’t help but wonder where those impulses go when you’re with your fiancé. You’d been damn near climbing into his lap after an hour alone with him — and yet, Malcolm has made it through four years of high school and three years of college without fucking you.

He curses himself. He shouldn’t think about it that way. He shouldn’t think about it at all. He glances down quickly as your foot knocks into his and withdraws as quickly as it has inched forwards.

Looking back up, you’re looking at him again. Just fleetingly, and you’re back to your work, and he’s back to thinking about you fucking kissing him. He just doesn’t get it. He doesn’t understand the knee length nightgown, or the weird reaction to the painting — or, you at all, really.

So, the two of you let the silence linger between you. Even as he shifts, pushing his leg forward and slotting his foot between both of yours under the table, letting it linger there.

…

Tags: @thedroneranger @batdanceq @wkndwlff @cassiemitchell @himbos-on-ice e @bradshawsbaby @damrlova @fudge13 @xoxabs88xox @mak-32 @sihtricswife @callsignvenus @callsign-joyride @harper1666 @krismdavis @sheisanangell @thecitysgraveyard @cherrycola27 @sugarcoated-lame

[minecraftbookshelf]

Weapons of Choice

@justanaveragelizardperson has spoken! (Thank you so much, not being able to decide was driving me up the wall)

We'll hit this in alphabetical order, my headcanons for these are a combination of canon inspiration and pure, world-building results. Also this is not 100% accurate to how swords especially work in real life, this is a fantasy genre story and we embrace the "But It Looks Cool" here.

-

Fwip: His preferred weapons are potions and explosions, he always has a fireworks crossbow to hand. As far as bladed weapons go he has a long dagger that doubles for chopping potions ingredients when he doesn't have his actual tools to hand.

Gem: Primarily uses her staff in combat, but if the occasion calls for it will just haul back and punch her opponent in the face. Is scrappy and level-headed, which is a dangerous combination.

Joey: Primarily fights with a smallsword when he has to fight but is the least martially minded of the rulers. Keeps totems of undying on him at all times.

Katherine: Her sword is a light-weight saber, her fighting style relies on her being light and quick on both her feet and her wings. She can also call the Overgrown to defend her and itself if the occasion calls for it.

LDShadowLady: Fights with a trident. She has a sword but doesn't really use it. The trident is the traditional weapon of the Oceanic royalty, thus both hers and Jimmy's. Will also sic axolotls on her enemies without hesitation.

Mythical J. Sausage: The Blood Sword is a zweihänder. He also carries a short sword to wield with a shield. His grip is half-open, giving a bit less flexibility but greater power to his blows. He acquires his sorcerers staff at one point and then favors that about equal with the Blood Sword.

PearlescentMoon: Equally proficient with her sword, axe, and scythe, as well as hand to hand. Is also skilled with the bow but prefers close combat methods. Her sword is a longsword that she wields both two handed and with a shield. She has a very rooted fighting style, her footwork is minimal, but when she does go more mobile she is very well balanced. She relies somewhat on her ability to tank hits, which serves her well, as her endurance is incredibly high, as demonstrated by her ability to go toe-to-toe with semi-immortal beings on a regular basis and hold her own. Shes very adept at using her elytra in combat, to the point that multiple rulers with natural wings have commented on her flight proficiency.

Pixlriffs: His preferred weapon is a Channeling Trident, his second choice is his basket-hilted sword (a schiavona) or recurve bow.

Shrub Berry: Joey gifted them a smallsword which for her functions as a broadsword. She's relatively new to combat but is proficient with a hatchet and a recurve bow. Their greatest weapon is the wolf pack.

Smajor: (There is no war rune blade in Ba Sing Se.) We're sticking with the LotR aesthetic for weapons as well, so that is what his sword looks like (A long-sword after the style of those used by the Lorien forces at Helm's Deep in the films) Also proficient with a longbow. At the time of the story beginning is not even close to considering using his ice magic in combat.

SmallishBeans: Equally favors a Mezalean shortsword (based off a xiphos) and a battle axe. He does have a trident and is fairly proficient with it but prefers to use it for travel rather than combat.

Solidarity: The Codfather Sword is a two-handed sword, closest to a claymore, he wields it with an open grip. (Which allows for more flexibility and control of the blade but the strikes are less powerful) When he's in Fish Mode it is more of a bastard/hand-and-a-half sword. He also uses a trident, mostly for aquatic combat.

Xornoth: Two swords. Has never willingly used a shield in their life and isn't about to start now. Is either dual wielding elvish-style short swords or has a full-size battle axe. Will sometimes throw fire and lava but tends to be cautious with it.

-

AU Masterpost

[theoryofweirdness]

What if Deku Link was in Super Smash Bros.?

My Gravity Falls Smash movesets seem to have done reasonably well, so I thought I'd also post the other ideas I've had.

We all know that the Legend of Zelda series is in desperate need of more representation in Smash; even though there's six characters, three of them are just minor variations on the basic Link moveset and Ganondorf's moveset is famously still mostly the same as it was in Melee, that is to say, a copy of Captain Falcon and therefore not remotely representative of anything he does in any of his canon appearances. While there are plenty of fan projects focused around correcting that travesty (Project M comes to mind), there's still plenty more potential for Smash characters within Nintendo's third-biggest franchise.

Initially, I had conceived of the three main non-Hylian races in The Legend of Zelda (Gorons, Zoras, and Deku) as a single fighter that would transform between the three forms like Pokémon Trainer does, in an homage to the transformation mechanic from Majora's Mask (which should have 100% been the basis of Young Link's appearance in Ultimate; he'd look way cooler with the Gilded or Razor Sword and Mirror Shield than the Kokiri Sword and Deku Shield, and Fierce Deity as his Final Smash instead of the Triforce, since Young Link is literally the only version of the character who's never had it).

But I digress. After some work on that initial design, I realized that it would be much more fun to make each race a fully independent character, with moves and features pulled from across the whole Zelda series.

General Overview

The basis of this moveset is Deku Link from Majora's Mask, which serves as the character's default model. Though Deku Link is not a typical-looking Deku Scrub, he's the only one we ever see fight. Deku Scrub is the lightest and fastest of the three Zelda races, but doesn’t deal very much damage. Many of Deku Scrub's moves are similar to Lucas and Villager, though that’s just a coincidence. I only noticed those similarities after the fact. You’ll need to be quick and agile with this character, as they're very light and will be easily launched. Deku Scrub also has good ranged attacks that work very well for slowing enemies down and landing smash attacks or starting combos. As always, I haven't yet ironed out all the details, so any suggestions are welcome!

Size (Height/Weight stated as approximate comparison to existing fighters)  Height: Small, similar size to Villager or Isabel. Weight: Featherweight. Since Deku Link is light enough to (briefly) walk on water, it’d be one of the lightest fighters in Smash. Likely comparable to Kirby.

Special Moves

[B] Neutral Special - Magic Bubble: [MA] Hold [B] to power up a bubble projectile. Smaller bubbles just pop and deal small flinching damage, but the fully charged bubble will also paralyze other fighters (like Z-suit Samus’s stunner). Enemies with higher damage will be paralyzed longer.  Damage (min): 3% Damage (max): 5%

[B + </>] Side Special - Deku Nut: [PH] Spits a Deku Nut forward. It acts just like the item (bursts on contact with fighters/ground/items/etc., stuns grounded fighters, damages and launches airborne fighters), but with a lot less damage. Has an 8-second cooldown until you can use it again. You can use this Special Move while flying with Deku Scrub’s U-Special by pressing [A], in which case it will fall straight down. Damage (to airborne): 11.5% Cooldown: 8 seconds 

[^ + B] Up Special - Deku Flower Flight: [EA] Use two Deku flowers to fly through the air with a lot of control. If started on the ground, you’ll burrow into a Deku Flower first, then burst out when [B] is released. Bursting out can deal damage and launch enemies until you reach the peak of the jump, though it’s strongest at the base. The flight part of the move is much the same as Villager or Isabel’s balloon flight. Your flowers can be hit; lose one and you can’t gain height, lose both and you’ll go into freefall. Damage (max, flower burst): 23%

[v + B] Down Special - Magic Beans: A 3-step move, like Villager’s Garden.  1: Plant a magic bean (trips enemies)

2: Water it from a bottle (pushes enemies)

3: The bean sprouts into a leafy platform item. It will rise into the air when a fighter stands on it. You can use this to move upward, or throw enemies onto it to mess them up and possibly KO off the top of the stage. Also, Deku Scrub and Villager can water each others’ sprouts!

Ground Moves

[A] Jab: [PH] 2 quick punches. Very short ranged, but good for jab-locking.  Damage (per hit):

[>>, A] Dash Attack: [PH] A multi-hitting hat spin, much like Megaman’s Dash Attack. Damage (per hit): 1%

Smash Attacks

[A + <</>>] Side Smash: [PH] A powerful swing with a Deku Stick that can reflect projectiles. Has a strong launching sweet spot at the tip. Nearly identical to Lucas’s S-Smash. Damage (max, sweetspot): 

[^^ + A] Up Smash: [WI] A bubble blast overhead. Charging increases the size of the blast. It isn’t particularly powerful, but has very little end lag and charges quicker than most Smash attacks. Damage (max): 

[vv + B] Down Smash: [PH] Smash a Deku Nut on the ground. Low damage, but can stun ground-borne enemies. Similar to Villager’s D-smash. Damage (max): 

Tilts

[<A>] Side Tilt: [PH] A shorter hat spin than the Dash Attack that moves forward and hits once on both sides. Damage:

[^A] Up Tilt: [PH] Spin a Deku stick overhead, just like Villager’s U-tilt, though this one only hits once, but launches farther. Damage: 3%

[vA] Down Tilt: [PH] Spin the wood shell that Deku Scrub is hiding in once. Hits enemies up in front of you, so it’s good for combos. Also hits in the back, but it’s stronger in front. Damage (front): 4.5% Damage (back): a

Air Attacks

[Jump, A] N-Air: [PH] Midair spin. Can be a good combo starter. Damage: 

[Jump, > + A] F-Air: [PH] Spit a Deku seed forward with good range. Very similar to Villager’s F-air. Damage: 3%

[Jump, ^ + A] U-Air: [PH] Headbutt. Quick, decent damage, good for juggling. Damage: 

[Jump, < + A] B-Air: [PH] Spit a Deku seed backward with good range (same as F-air).  Damage: 3%

[Jump, v + A] D-Air: [PH] A spinning drill kick that multihits and spikes enemies downward on the final hit, similar to Kirby’s D-air. Damage (per hit): 1%

Grabs and Throws

[Grab] Grab: Traps the enemy inside a large bubble (based on the manga, where Link traps Tatl in a bubble shortly after being transformed into a Deku Scrub).

[Grab, A] Pummel: Bounce on top of the bubble.

[Grab, >] F-Throw: [PH] Use a Deku stick as a bat to hit the bubble forward. It pops after a short distance, but until then it can hit other fighters. Damage (to grabbed):  Damage (hit by bubble):

[Grab, ^] U-Throw: [PH] Go underneath the bubble and spit it upward, where it pops overhead. Can damage other fighters when the bubble pops. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others when popped): 

[Grab, <] B-Throw: [PH] Use a hat spin to hit the bubble backward. It can hit other fighters and pops after a short distance. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others):

[Grab, v] D-Throw: [PH] Jump hard on top of the bubble and pop it, landing on top of the enemy. The pop can hit other fighters. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others):

Movement (Speed and jump height stated as approximate comparison to existing fighters.)

[</>] Walking: Due to its short legs, Deku Scrub is a slow walker, probably not the slowest in the game, but definitely not fast either.

[<</>>] Dash: Fortunately, running is much faster, since Deku Link appears to run very fast (though looks like he’s going to fall over). Like Luigi, Deku Scrub will slide when changing directions or stopping while running.

[Jump] Jumps: 2, with the second one being considerably higher, but not a “flying” jump like Mewtwo or Yoshi.

[v] Crouch: hide under a wooden shell (Deku Link's shield from Majora’s Mask)

[Shield + v/^] Spot dodge: Basic background dodge.

[Shield + >] F-roll: Roll forward (looks like head is rolling).

[Shield + <] B-roll: Basic backward roll

[Jump, Shield + Air dodge: Basic air dodge.

Miscellaneous

Up Taunt: Plays the in-game note sequence of the Sonata of Awakening (the Deku Scrubs’ key song) on the Deku Pipes.

Down Taunt: Spins around, staying in place.

Side Taunt: Hold up a Deku flower like an umbrella (inspired by the Deku Butler).

Idle Animation: Looks around, sneezes.

Stage entry: Pop out of a yellow Deku Flower.

Origin Symbol: Triforce (same as the other Zelda fighters)

Kirby Hat: Wears the Deku Mask from Majora’s Mask (Magic Bubble).

Victory 1: Same as U-taunt, but plays the entire song, not just the in-game input segment.

Victory 2: Fly in on Deku flower copters, then dive into a large Deku Flower on the ground and pop back out facing the camera.

Victory 3: (description)

FINAL SMASH: Lost Woods 

Deku Scrub plays Saria’s Song on the Deku Pipes and the stage is transported into the Lost Woods. Enemies are randomly teleported around (though not over pits) while Deku Babas and Mad Scrubs appear to attack them. Lasts 15 seconds. All other stage effects are disabled or halted during this Final Smash.  Mad Scrubs will pop out of the ground to fire barrages of nuts, and with so many of them, enemies will be hard-pressed to avoid taking heavy damage. Deku Babas will lunge at nearby enemies with surprising reach, delivering strong launching bites. Damage (Deku Baba bite) [PH]: 12% Damage (Mad Scrub shot) [PH]: 8%

Alternate Colors 1) Default Deku Link colors (brown wood, green hat and tunic)

2) Blue Deku Link (tunic & hat)

3) Orange Deku Link with green leaves/hair

4) Dark Link inspired (black tunic and hat, red eyes, dark gray wood)

5) Alternate costume: Deku Princess (red and white dress, leafy green ponytail with a pink flower at the tip)

6) Purple Deku Princess (purple dress, yellow flower)

7) White Deku Princess (white dress and ponytail, yellow flower)

8) Yellow Deku Princess (yellow dress, blue flower)

[deke-rivers-1957]

Ross Carpenter's Rank

Disclaimer: For my tier list I’m basing this off of a one on one fight with no weapons and no outside interference. If a character has to rely on a weapon they’re ranked lower. If a character has to fight more than one person at a time, I’d look at it on a case by case basis. Age, size and general background are factors that will be taken into consideration. Since a lot of those details are going to be up to interpretation as these are characters and not real people, feel free to share your own thoughts.

Girls! Girls! Girls! most likely takes place during the Spring of 1962. Blue Hawaii was still in theaters based on the posters you see in the background. Even though it was released in November of 61, movies back didn't release in every theater at once. Based on the movie being filmed in the Spring of 1962, we can assume that this was the case with Blue Hawaii. Ross being on a fishing boat and specifically wants to catch as much tuna as possible indicates that this is Spring since in Hawaii the best time of year to catch tuna is about March to August. May in particular seems to be the best time to catch skipjack tuna when fishing just offshore.

We don't know Ross' specific age but we can make assumptions based on what we hear in the movie. Ross works at a nightclub that is known to serve alcohol. While no nightclub would hire someone under the age of 18 it's also likely that this owner would not hire him if he was also under the legal drinking age. In Hawaii at the time the drinking age was 20, meaning Ross is older than that. Since we can assume that he's been going to this nightclub for some time, I think we can assume that he's no younger than 25, making him in his mid 20s.

I can't even consider this a fight but since a punch is thrown it's worth mentioning. It's especially worth mentioning when you consider the fact that Rusty from Girl Happy lost against some drunken frat boys. Granted this movie depicts this fight in a more realistic way since there's no way someone he's fully sober and aware of an oncoming fight wouldn't be able to dodge a punch thrown by a completely wasted person.

So how do I grade this? Well at the very least Ross can dodge a punch and not lose to a drunk man. That would put him above Rusty in the overall ranking, but it doesn't really say much about his fighting ability. It would've been interesting if he showed up again when he was more sober so we can see exactly how Ross would compare. But as it stands, it's a win by default for Ross.

The only other two fights are against the same person. I'll break down how he matches up against Johnson here. Johnson is essentially described as being older than Ross. Jeremy Slate, Johnson's actor was in real life around 10 years older than Elvis. Since we already established that Ross is no older than his mid-20s let's just assume Johnson is an even 35. That would give Ross an age advantage and a physical advantage since he's still actively doing manual labor.

As for the skills shown during this fight, it's average. Typical street fighter level, but his age and strength are factors that can't be ignored. Then again, Johnson does look fit for his age so it's likely that Ross isn't at as much an advantage. Still it's a confirmed win for Ross.

This is where we have a more legitimate fight. Johnson at least suspected that Ross would find a way to save Laurel. Even though his guard was up, he still loses to Ross. At the same time, I'm not sure how much of this is a skill issue or Johnson simply not feeling as heated. Either way we do see that on a boat Ross has the advantage.

I do give him points for being able to maneuver on an uneven, constantly moving surface. It shows that he has a great sense of balance that comes from years of experience working on a boat. He still technically wins since Johnson yields.

Ross being physically fit enough to work on a boat and having a great sense of balance definitely gives him promise as a fighter. Given that he doesn't have a car and is seen walking everywhere when he's on land, I'd say he would have high levels of stamina.

Therefore I would put him in high B tier. His age and skillset would set him apart from other street fighters. He just doesn't have the training to outright win against characters who do. Also I'm not sure how he would do against an opponent that isn't drunk or older than him. I can only assume based on what I see in the movie so I can understand if others think that these 3 scenes aren't enough to be considered fights.

[seldaryne]

3, 9 and 10 for Haelryne(for the tav asks)!!

3. Did your Tav receive any formal or informal education? If yes, how well did they learn? If no, why not?

Not exactly. Both of her parents were part of the merchant class, and so while she definitely learned the sort of things you would in a formal setting via her interactions with the family business, school was more of a secondary concern. She also picked up a fair bit of knowledge on jewellery & watch crafting, which is still an interest of hers but not something she'll ever pursue professionally. It does help when it comes to not getting scammed in markets, though. She's pretty good at eyeballing the weight of an item and guessing value based on materials, and don't even try to fool her into thinking a piece of glass is a genuine diamond (also, she's convinced that there's nothing wrong with faux gems, but you need to be honest about your wares!).

She's got a fondness for pretty, delicate metal work in her jewellery purchases, since it's reminiscent of what she grew up seeing. It reminds her of sitting beside the workbench after the storefront had closed, watching her father's skilled hands decisively create something beautiful for the hundredth time, still completely bewitched by the process. She could never get quite as good, and perhaps that has something to do with him having nearly a century more of practice under his belt. She prefers to laugh it off, blaming it on a lack of patience & a heavier hand. But every so often, she'll find herself with time and a set of tools, and she'll give it another go.

Of course, despite being surface-raised (Haelryne doesn't count the time she lived in the Underdark as a literal infant as part of her life experience) it was important for her & her sisters to learn some combat skills. This is largely where her mother stepped in, and where her talent for two-handed weapons quickly emerged. She sees the greatsword as an extension of her person, an old friend who constantly has her back, and her movements are shockingly graceful despite its size. Combining that with magic had been an obvious next step. You don't have an extra hand for a shield, so you'll simply have to keep one up with concentration. It's served her pretty well, in her own opinion, only rarely faltering when she's truly caught off-guard. As an adult, you can count on her to be the person who never gets tired of saying 'show me how to do that, please?' when she spots a new technique. She doesn't expect she'll ever be at an expert level when it comes to the hand-to-hand skills of a monk or a rogue's duel wielding, but there's always something she can gain from the lessons (even if it's sometimes just a fond memory).

9. What was your Tav doing when they were taken by the mind flayers?

Travelling, moving around between jobs. She might have been able to make a decent living for herself, had she stayed with the family business. But it was abundantly clear that her sisters were more suited for that position. Not only were they able to produce products of a higher quality (a fact that had long since been set in motion by the reality of them being significantly older and in command of better fine motor skills by the time Haelryne was old enough to give it a go), they also just generally had better heads for business. Not a huge feat, given that Haelryne would give them that based purely on her tendency to underprice & get haggled down out of pity on a regular basis.

So for herself, she decided to strike out on her own for a bit, taking on mercenary work as she travelled the continent. She does her best to keep this ethical, avoiding sticking her nose into dicier situations as much as she can. She typically enjoys the escort jobs where she finds herself helping a family or merchant secure a safe travel route. Darkvision is certainly an added bonus, and she knows a handful of the roads intimately well. She's fond of being able to play something of a tour guide, if the client allows it.

But when abducted, she didn't have any work on her plate, and didn't have any set schedule for accepting something new either. She's pretty glad for this, as she knows she would feel terrible for leaving a job incomplete, especially without being able to give any sort of notice.

10. What would your Tav consider to be their greatest skill? Is this accurate?

While you probably wouldn't guess, Haelryne actually does a lot of critical self-comparison against her sisters. It's not so much that she feels a failure for not being able to stay in business or having to choose her own path, she was simply unfortunate enough to be the last born after a decade-long gap in children. Most of her childhood memories involve looking at their backs in some form or another, struggling to keep up & desperately wanting to be more like them. Now, most older children don't particularly want to play babysitter, even if the baby in question promises they won't be any trouble or mess things up this time. They probably didn't go out of their way to bully her either, but the exclusion and the teasing could only ever have amounted to that. Haelryne was also a bit sensitive to start, prone to easily tearing up and feeling everything far too deeply. In the end, every slight, no matter how minor, left a stain on her heart.

Consequently, she actually doesn't think much of her good qualities. It's always a 'Yes, I'm good, but this person is far better.' A yes, with an asterisk, some condition that makes sure to keep her humble. She's quick to accept compliments so long as she can brush them off with a variant of oh, but it's not a big deal, really! And owing to her typically cheerful, sweet demeanour, this habit tends to go unnoticed, or explained away as an expected social grace. There's plenty of things she's skilled at, she's just incapable of actually recognizing them.

She does, however, like her ability to get close to people. She doesn't count empathy as a skill, since she doesn't feel as though it was something she had to work for or learn, but it very much is. Her soft heart drives her to reach out to everyone she can, searching for a foothold so that she can ensure they feel properly seen. She can't solve the world's problems on her own, but she feels it's important to at least do what she can to make people's lives easier on a small scale. She's never been so lucky as to hear the voice of Eilistraee, but the idea of someone looking towards her people and extending a merciful hand strikes her very being. Eilistraee saw the fear and suffering, and said no, there's another option. Not just for the Drow, but for anyone who feels they need it. That's the sort of ideal Haelryne tries to emulate, that fierce, resilient type of love & understanding that can only ever exist in the face of unfathomable agony. Helping one person isn't as grand, and perhaps it won't even make a difference to the overall state of the world. But if it makes a difference to that person, she's more than content with herself.

tav asks.

[reblip-reblog]

The Evolution of Link by Dan Ryckert

Scan of pages 38-39 from Game Informer Issue 222: The Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword

‎

Transcript & Close-Ups:

‎

The Evolution of Link by Dan Ryckert

‎

The Legend of Zelda (1987)

Link's debut introduced many of his trade-marks — a green tunic, his silent manner, and iconic items like the boomerang, bombs, and bow. When gamers saw him in-game, many wondered what the odd green pixels above his eyes were. We still don't know for sure.

Zelda II: The Adventure of Link (1988)

Zelda II: The Adventure of Link shifted our view of the hero thanks to its sidescrolling nature. We saw him from the top-down on the over-world map, but most of our time with him was running from left to right in XP grinding runs.

A Link to the Past (1992)

With Link to the Past, the Christian cross imagery was replaced with the iconic Triforce and other designs. While the character's art has almost always portrayed him with blond/brown hair, his in-game sprite appeared to have pink hair.

‎

Link's Awakening (1993) • Oracle of Ages / Oracle of Seasons (2001)

Link's three installments on the Game Boy didn't take the look of the character in any unexpected directions. With the system's limited screen resolution, Nintendo developers didn't have much room to work with when it came to the character's in-game model.

Ocarina of Time (1998)

In previous titles, Link's age was never clearly defined. With his 3D debut, we got to see two distinct versions of the hero — Young Link and Adult Link. The latter is the model that became most recognizable, serving as the basis for his appearances in Soul Calibur II and Super Smash Bros.

Majora's Mask (2000)

Majora's Mask may have featured gameplay mechanics based on time, but Link remained young throughout. This disappointed some who enjoyed the more mature Link from Ocarina of Time, but the 24 masks in the game guaranteed he'd have more abilities than ever before.

‎

Majora's Mask (2000)

Other masks in the game granted him new abilities, but the Deku, Goron, and Zora masks turned Link into new creatures entirely. These allowed him to navigate around Termina differently, and even changed the instrument he played.

Majora's Mask (2000)

Once all the other masks were collected, Link could turn into his most intimidating form ever — Fierce Deity Link. This form was only available during boss fights, and allowed Link to shoot beams out of his curving sword.

Wind Waker (2003)

With his GameCube debut, Link was reintroduced in his most controversial form yet. Thanks to the cel-shaded style of Wind Waker, Link appeared more child-like and cartoonish than ever. While some gamers cried foul over this new direction, the game and art design are generally looked back upon fondly.

‎

Four Swords Adventure (2004) • Minish Cap (2005) • Phantom Hourglass (2007) • Spirit Tracks (2009)

After Wind Waker, Link's portable adventures stuck with the Toon Link design. From the size-changing Minish Cap on GBA to his two DS titles, the expressive and simple design worked well on the small screen.

Twilight Princess (2006)

Link's return to form was so well-received that longtime Zelda fans openly wept in the audience when he was shown off at E3 2004. His final GameCube game (and Wii debut) featured the most adult-looking Link to date, as well as an alternate wolf form.

Skyward Sword (2011)

With his newest adventure, Link is looking decidedly classic. No drastic changes have been made to his iconic design, but Hyrule looks different thanks to the game's watercolor-like visuals.

‎

‎

[hellhathfrozethover]

why

is Metal Man described as having a design flaw that makes him vulnerable to Rock's buster when he only takes one damage from it (as opposed to Air Man, Quick Man, Flash Man, and Heat Man, who all take two)? shouldn't the issue be that he's horribly weak to his own weapon?

does Air Man take damage from the Leaf Shield because its leaves jam his fan, but deflects the Metal Blade entirely, when the saws are of a stronger material (ceratanium, apparently) and probably around the size to achieve the same effect?

is Air Man able to jump so high despite being so large, when Wood Man is just as large if not moreso, and can barely get off the ground; how is he propelling himself upwards? are there jets in his feet?

is Quick Man able to deflect the Metal Blade, but not the Shadow Blade?

does using the Time Stopper HEAL Flash Man? what the actual fuck sense does that make? also, why does the Item 3 reverse course when Flash Man uses the Time Stopper? shouldn't it just halt in place?

does the Quick Boomerang not do shit to Wood Man, despite being a cutting weapon just the same as the Metal Blade? is it too flimsy? it looks like it's made of energy, and would thus be hot, but is that not the case?

doesn't Mecha Dragon have any invulnerability to the Atomic Fire, and is in fact weak to it, despite using fire as a weapon?

does Snake Man take more damage from the Needle Cannon than the Shadow Blade, despite the Shadow Blade being the overall stronger weapon that serves the same purpose (sharp and stabby)?

is Needle Man invulnerable to the Hard Knuckle, but not Hard Man, when he is supposed to be the most durable robot of his line?

is Drill Man stated to be haphazard/計画性 and dislike doing calculations/computations/doing math when that is more than half the job of mining? measure twice cut once? especially when drilling around pre-existing construction? why would Mikhail make him like this?

does Ring Man dislike children when the man who created him quite notably has a child? is this not a conflict of interest?

is Dive Man prone to seasickness when he is meant to traverse the seas on a regular basis? why would Mikhail make him like this? also, he's much bigger and heftier, so why is Drill Man more durable than him?

is it that Uranus is defensively superior to the literal destruction god, Sunstar? and that Enker is more well defended than Uranus?

does Dr. Wily have such an infatuation with space and aliens? in Mega Man 2, he cosplays a space alien. in every Rock Man World game except 3, his fortresses are all space stations and space battleships (with 5 having him partner up with proper aliens). in Mega Man 3, he recovers Shadow Man, a robot of dubious extraterrestrial origin. he built Star Man, reprogrammed Astro Man AND Galaxy Man. in Mega Man 8, he somehow manages to harness alien matter (the evil energy) to power his robots. he once again partners up with another alien (Ra Moon) in Super Adventure Rock Man, and AGAIN in Rock Man Strategy with the constellation droids. he invented the Time Skimmer to warp through spacetime. his damn main mode of transport is based off of a stereotypical UFO. why? why space?

is Dr. Wily so obsessed with Guts Man? in Mega Man 1 (sadly redacted in MMPU), he has a hall of golden Guts Man models in his fortress. he built the Guts Tank. Gamma's design borrows elements from Guts Man. he built Stone Man (who befriended Guts Man, even), and the Power Musclers (I'd argue Search Man too, has the Gutsy look to him). in Mega Man 7, he built Guts Man S based off his husk in the Robot Museum. he's probably the reason Uranus has a bishie sparkle on his stage selected portrait, what is wrong with him.

is it so hotly demanded we have Roll as a playable character, on the front lines of defence, when she is overtly described as "cowardly/恐がり"? why would she ever want to do a thing like that?

are some against the idea of other humanoid robots besides Rock and Roll being of a childlike disposition, just because their intended ages aren't outright stated? even when voice casting would imply otherwise? (Cut Man, Ice Man, Clown Man, Aqua Man, Bounce Man, etc.) i'm not saying you can't say no. but why?

does Rush dislike "remodeling/reconstructions/改造手()術" when his entire Thing is to adapt into different utilities? is he just plain miserable every time he has to go through an update or undergo a shift in mode? why would Dr. Light make him like this?

is Bass distinguished from the Mega Man Killers in serial code when his purpose is ostensibly the same? were they not all designed with the express purpose of killing Mega Man? why does it matter that he was built with Bassnium?

is Bassnium lauded as this incredibly strong material when whatever Enker has going on with his armour is far harder to penetrate?

did Shadow Man not get revived with the rest of the 3rd line during the temple fight in Super Adventure Rock Man? did Ra Moon simply choose not to revive him? was the extraterrestrial material he was made up of somehow not accessible by this all-powerful god-mode supercomputer?

does the Mega Arm work? if it's true no Earth weapons can touch the Space Rulers, then what the hell is the Mega Arm actually made of? those power crystals the 3rd line were farming out in space to help power Gamma?

did anyone fall for the Mr. X trick in Mega Man 6?

does Dark Man 4 cosplay as Blues without having taken out the real Blues first, surely knowing that if he were allowed to live, it would throw a wrench in the "have the hero believe in you" plan?

isn't everyone in the known universe weak to the Black Hole, or Black Hole Bomb?

isn't Quick Man's rivalry with Rock given more spotlight? with how much preferential treatment Rock gave him in Super Adventure Rock Man (a favour returned, no less, the guy's just happy to spend time fighting with him "victory or defeat"), combined with the fact that Quick Man was willing to peacefully race with him in Battle & Chase, PLUS the juxtaposition of equipping his weapon during the spring season in the ending of Mega Man 2? why isn't he more important in Rock's narrative?

isn't Ballade the same way? for someone who resented his purpose so strongly that he paid the ultimate price, why does he just go back to fighting you in the Wily Star? how is that fair?

were there complaints about Oil Man when nobody complained about Ripot, or the later Metools for that matter.

do certain bosses with a weakness to blunt force or fire weapons also have immunity to bombs? combustion with a wide range is two for the price of one, isn't it?

does Jupiter not have back talons? and why are his front ones so fat? is he not expected to grab onto or perch on anything with them?

has Capcom forgotten that there are other final boss fights that don't have to include the Wily Capsule?

aren't we informed of what happens to civil service robots that come under Dr. Wily's control through theft and forceful reprogramming? do we help them? are they stuck with Dr. Wily indefinitely?

is Monsteropolis/Megalopolis/Symphony City/Mega City so fucking stupid as to not enact capital punishment on the ONE source of ALL their problems once they had him jailed? the world would quite literally be a better and more peaceful place without Dr. Wily, and you can't just hand down a verdict to kill him?

does Dr. Wily bother with earning money honestly as a career criminal? why has he got Gyro Man out here collecting ticket fees at the Sky Gardens, or Crystal Man selling counterfeit crystals when he has enough muscle to just steal everything he needs forever? when no-one in government is strong enough to stop him?

are the armed forces/navy/marine corps/air force/literally god damned any military branch you can think of in this universe so anaemic and feckless? particularly America's. you've got 800+ different bases all over the world, nuclear arms, and yet this man's bullshit cannot be stopped?

is the world so overreliant on Rock to solve all their Wily-related problems? isn't this dangerous, to leave every arm of counterterrorism to one man?

is Rock's maturity so understated by the fandom? why isn't it acknowledged that, although not physically, living the way he has is affecting and changing him?

why

CAN'T I BEAT THE FUCKING KING PLANE WHY WOULD YOU PUT THIS GOD DAMN IMPOSSIBLE THING AFTER THE HERCULEAN EFFORT IT TOOK TO BEAT THE KING TANK WHO THE FUCK DESIGNED THIS THING I'M GONNA PUKE

why is Shark Man so cute. i just want to squish his face he's such a little baby. look at him

[thenexusofsouls]

Private Muse: Nuada Bethmoora

[Bio and other information below the cut!]

Type of Character & Fandom/Source Material: Fantasy canon character from the movie Hellboy II: The Golden Army (I used to write him over at @fallxnprxnce​).

Disclaimer: All the information in this post is a mashup of canon information and my own headcanons/fleshing-out/OCs, etc. I’m not going to bother to mention what’s what for most of it or I’ll be here all day, heh, so I’m just going to lay it all out as one narrative. If you have any questions on whether something is a headcanon or was actually in the movie, or you want further explanations about anything below, please don’t hesitate to ask. I have been developing Nuada, his friends, and his world for many years, so although this post is long, it is only a fraction of the info crammed in my brain about this muse, haha. So yes, feel free to ask about anything you wish. Please do. =)

What I Mean By “Private Muse”: This muse is only open to mutuals and people I already rp with, so no new partners with this one for now. I have my own mental health and time constraint reasons for limiting him, and I only want to write him in a limited capacity and on a trial basis right now. Anyone can send him or me informational asks (ones that aren’t starters or rps, but that just ask questions about him), but for actual rps I’m keeping this mutuals and regulars only until further notice. If you aren’t sure if I would be willing to write Nuada with your muse(s), you can always ask me through the inbox or messager.

FC: Luke Goss as Nuada

Species: High Elf (collectively refers to ancient lines of full-size, humanoid, bipedal Elven races; seen as sort of nobility among Elvenkind... as opposed to smaller, non-humanoid-shaped, quadrupedal, shapeshifting, cryptid, or aquatic races of elves)

Race / Ethnicity: Sun Elf (a race of High Elves associated with the sun, fire, heat, gold metal, gold and yellow and cream colors, and the growth of plants as nurtured by the sun; these elves are distinguishable by their cream skin, golden hair... unless white from age, ochre colored eyes, and ochre colored blood; they are known for their battle prowess, musical ability, intelligence, dexterity in many trades, and their resistance to fire)

Bloodline / House: Bethmoora (the longstanding ruling House of the Sun Elven race)

Age: Ancient (2K+) (Sun Elves are immortal but not invincible; they can still die of injury, illness, broken hearts, and they can “fade,” which is a graceful way of saying they lose the will to live and die of what they call “natural causes”; they consider fading to be nature’s way of returning them to the earth and allowing their spirits to rest when they have served their purpose in life; fading is cause for grief, to be sure, but it is also seen as something natural and better than living with bitterness, anger, or sadness in one’s heart, or outliving one’s usefulness in life)

Gender: Male

Romantic Orientation: Demi-biromantic

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Occupation: Prince; Warrior

Family: King Balor (canon father, deceased or not based on verse); Queen Elunae (OC mother, deceased, but her ghost still hangs around him, unbeknownst to him; I used to write her under the url “queenofbethmoora,” but the blog was deleted because of T.umb.lr derp); Princess Nuala (canon twin sister)

Potentially Triggering Material in Threads: Violence; g.enoc.idal tendencies (against humans as a race compared to elves); toxic thinking and relationships; sibling rivalry; patricide; sui.cidal ideation 

Negative Personality Traits: Arrogance; anger; impulsivity; shortsightedness; stubbornness

Positive Personality Traits: Bravery; fierceness; loyalty; passion; perseverance; and a surprising amount of love even though it’s been tainted in some ways over the years

Important Personality/Nature Aspect - Nuada’s “Wild Heart”: This is something that I’ve spent a long time thinking about and detailing, and it is crucially important to Nuada as a person, as it influences his thinking and actions in many ways. I call it "croí fiáin," which in Nuada’s native language means “wild heart.” With Nuada, it’s not just a case of being hard to catch and hold onto, being a free spirit, or being a restless person with a lot of energy. It’s much more than that, and it is a condition that is so much a part of him that he cannot escape it. It functions almost like a medical or mental health condition. It’s the essence of the difference between a domesticated animal and a wild one, on a mental and spiritual level. In this post, I explain all about it and give links to other posts that go into some analyses or talk about it from Nuada’s point of view. There is a good chance it will come up in threads, so you may want to read some of it over. Or you can just ask me for a quick rundown, that’s fine too.

Nuala was not born with this same "croí fiáin" condition. Even though they are twins, Nuala is very much Nuada’s opposite in personality, demeanor, emotional/mental inclinations, and temperament. She balances him out. So in contrast to his wild heart, she is serene, calm, practical, and measured. Their people believe that they are very literally two halves of one soul. The two of them together make one whole person, so each of them are incomplete without the other. This is a rare but known phenomenon that occurs among Nuada’s people, and it is the reason why they are physically and mentally linked to each other as well. Their people believe such occurrences of this split-soul phenomenon are indicative of some kind of special destiny for one or both of them, and that they are both cursed and blessed.

Important RP Note: I DO NOT ship Nuada and Nuala romantically or sexually. I know this is canon, but I’m just not doing it at all, sorry. My twins have a very negative relationship, with each believing they have been wronged/neglected/unappreciated by the other. Nuada is possessive of Nuala, and he does get jealous if she takes romantic interest in others, but that doesn’t mean he’s in love with her or wants her for himself. His jealousy more stems from his desire to mean as much to her as their father and others have, since he believes he doesn’t. It’s... a whole big mess and a longstanding feud of resentment between them. Nuada was closer to their mother but she died when they were younger, and Nuala was closer to their father. He resents Nuala for being their father’s favorite while also being jealous of others she gives her attention to. But yeah... I absolutely don’t ship them with each other.

Important Potential Medical Condition, the “Iron Malady” (tw: depression and suicidal thoughts/actions): The Iron Malady is an illness I created for one of my fictional medieval fantasy worlds that afflicted my own original races of elves, the Silverwood and Purplewood Elves. But I’ve also developed it for Nuada’s people as well, and this is actually the illness his mother died of. You can read more about it here. At its core, it is a lot like dying of grief or a broken heart, but there are some very specific causes, symptoms, and cures for it.

Background and General Information: I... don’t even know where to begin with this, heh. I’ve fleshed out parts of his childhood, his mother and his relationship with her, how his mother died, his early relationship with Nuala, his interactions with magical creatures that are now extinct, what his adolescence was like... There’s just so much. I feel like things will come out as they come up in threads? I’m just way to lazy to write out everything I can think of, haha. Feel free to ask me anything you’d like about him, though.

But very generally speaking, Nuada was born a prince to King Balor and Queen Elunae, along with a younger twin sister, Nuala. He’s a Sun Elf, meaning elves that are associated with warmth, sunlight, plants, forests, dawn, and the color/metal gold. They are naturally resistant to fire, cannot be burned, and unaffected by high temperature climates, but vulnerable to injury from freezing and hindered by cold climates. They are one of the older and more major races of elves, and one of the few with surviving members in the present day. Bethmoora is a well-known and longstanding House within Elven culture, whether you’re a High/Sun Elf or not. It was also a well-respected House, but news of Nuada’s break from the family and self-imposed exile put a tarnish on his reputation, and partly on Balor’s as well.

I keep pretty much everything from the movie as canon, I just add in a lot more to fill in the blanks, so if you’ve seen the movie, you’ve already got a good jump on Nuada’s story. Anything in his past that needs explaining or that comes up in threads, I will try to give enough context to understand it.

As far as the story of the movie if you haven’t seen it, Nuada is angry at humans for destroying the earth and causing the dwindling and extinction of numerous races and species, most notably his own. Non-human races have been relegated to the dark corners and underbellies of the Earth, being forced to live in fear and confinement out of sight and with the safety of their own kind. Instead of living in vast forests, Nuada’s people live underneath human cities, among brick walls, dark sewers, and metal pipes instead of trees, lakes, and mountains. They’re dying off, giving into what they feel is their time to “fade,” but Nuada, as one of the last real warriors of his race, refuses to fade, refuses to abandon the earth to human destruction, and refuses to accept that the future has a strictly human face.

His cause and his arguments are just and sound, but from there, he embarks on a cruel and misguided campaign to eradicate all humans from the planet using a weapon called the Golden Army. It is an army of magical, indestructible clockwork soldiers of goblin make that can almost instantly repair and rebuild themselves the moment they are damaged or destroyed. They are deadly, possessing immense strength and sharp blades. Whoever has the gold crown that conveys ownership of the Army controls their agenda. Nuada sets out to obtain that crown, which has been thirded to prevent anyone from taking control of the Army for the wrong reasons.

One piece says with Balor, one with Nuala, and one was given to the humans as a gesture of peace. Over time, humans forgot the treaty and the story, allowing their Elven friends to fall to ruin and treating their crown piece as a trivial piece of art. Nuada kills his father to obtain his piece, crashes an auction at which the humans’ piece was to be sold, and then goes after his sister for her piece. Nuala does everything she can to keep Nuada from getting the piece and reassembling the crown, but he does anyway, gaining control of the Army. Hellboy challenges him for control, being demon royalty himself, and Nuada has no choice but to accept. They duel, and as Nuada is about to win in a rather underhanded way, Nuala stabs herself, kill herself and her brother, since they are linked. Hellboy, now in control of the Army, ponders all the power it could afford him, but his girlfriend Liz melts it, destroying it forever.

I usually write Nuada before he thinks about gaining the other crown pieces, or I write him as not being able to find the human piece, kindof to stall the canon story in the movie so I can have more time and freedom with him in threads. I keep his basic agenda and opinions, but just pause the main story of the movie for threads to happen, heh. But I’m open to whatever people might like to explore at any point in his timeline.

Magical and Supernatural Abilities: 

Fire resistance and heat tolerance (e.g. holding the glowing hot map case without burning his hand)

Empathic and somatic link to his sister since birth (they are mentally linked over long distances, and their bodies mirror wounds and ailments between them)

Potential for empathic link creation with others by touching with his hands (Nuala and Abe created a link between them by touching their hands together, so Nuada can do this as well with other empathic individuals if an emotional connection is there)

Supernatural empathic capabilities: gleaning information from individuals, creatures, surfaces, or objects by touching them with his hands (e.g. knowing who touched an object last, learning someone’s name by touching them, or seeing what recently happened in a room by touching the walls)

Magical energy infusion: granting qualities, characteristics, or abilities to weapons or individuals by infusing them with magical energy (e.g. his spear lengthening and retracting; flawlessly regenerating the spear head)

Magical compulsion: compelling individuals and creatures to do something by lacing his speech with magic (e.g. whispering “kill him” to the forest god)

Friends: These are characters that tend to make somewhat regular appearances in threads with Nuada, depending on the location and nature of the thread. (See below for details and lots of links to posts with headcanons! Just be advised that these are from Nuada’s now-inactive blog and many of these posts are very old. Some of the info and links contained within them may be outdated.)

MR. WINK (a rock troll, also known as a rock ogre to some): Nuada’s righthand man, no pun intended. XD Also his close and dear friend. He is strong, brave, loyal, and shares Nuada’s hatred of human beings.

Appreciation post

How Mr. Wink met Nuada and how they became so close

Mr. Wink & sweets

Mr. Wink & tea

Mr. Wink hates sneezing

How Nuada sees Mr. Wink

THE BARK CHILDREN (small earth fae): The little two-headed creatures seen scampering all over the Troll Market. They act as messengers as well as eyes and ears for Nuada throughout the Market. They are innocent, intelligent, timid, playful, helpful, and curious.

Appreciation post

How Nuada sees the bark children

Nuada musing on the bark children’s treatment of him

Headcanons based on canon, part 1

Headcanons based on canon, part 2

Bark children and naming/identity

Jix & the bark children

TOOTH FAIRIES (small sky fae): Tiny, cute, but ravenous little fairies with an appetite for biological calcium, e.g. the calcium found in bones and especially teeth. They are one of the most intelligent types of fairies, able to speak and learn. They are playful and mischievous, as well as frenetic and talkative.

Pictures of the fairies

Gifs of the fairies

Nuada befriending a poisoned fairy

“CATHEDRAL HEAD”, A.K.A. THE ARCHIVIST: A wise old cartographer and archivist who makes and stores maps, scrolls, formal documents, and important letters in his library/shop. He lives and works in the specific Troll Market that is located underneath the human city of New York City, under the borough of Manhattan. He is well respected and trusted by many.

Appreciation post

The most interesting thing about this fellow is that his race are typically colonized by very tiny beings who build on top of their heads! They build from biological material (bone, keratin, sebaceous material), so the cathedral on his head is actually made of living material, an extension of his head. Tiny members of this wee race live inside the cathedral, and if you look closely, you might see lights going on and off in windows, or even the tiny creatures walking around on ledges and walkways.

The tiny race that lives on the Archivist’s head are actually involved in a mutually beneficial symbiotic relationship with him. They gain nutrients and building materials from his body as well as protection from the outside world, and he gains a very valuable protective covering over his brain. Otherwise, his kind are born with very soft heads and frequently suffer brain injuries without the benefit of the hard, keratin-based (the same material that fingernails or horns are made of) material shielding them.

When someone of his race is born, tiny colonists from the diminutive race are introduced onto the baby’s head. As the individual grows, the colonists build and multiply, protecting the baby’s brain from harm. When an individual dies, their colonists are transferred to infants, very often within their same family/bloodline.

The relationship between the wee race and the Archivist’s race is considered a very sacred trust, with each race benefitting and protecting the welfare of the other. The Archivist loves his head colonists dearly and takes very good care of them. His race considers it a solemn honor to be colonized.

Potential Starter Ideas:

Maybe not a starter, but if you want to ask Nuada about his family, friends, life, etc., I have spent an inordinate amount of time fleshing him out over the years. I’ve expanded his family, detailed a lot of inhabitants and aspects of the Troll Market underneath which he makes his living space, and have elaborated on things like his fears, triggers, likes, dislikes, customs, habits etc. He’s my oldest T.um.blr muse that I really took seriously, and back when I wrote him (2015 to 2019) I had a lot more free time than I do now, so I had the time to spend delving into the minutia of his life and world. Feel free to ask him (or me) about anything, as I would love to get back into this muse I put so much work into in the past.

The bark children see Nuada as a protector of them, of their community, and in general someone to go to when something is... going down. They will inform him of threats, curious things they find, things that scare them, and intruders. Very often bark children will show up in threads with Nuada because they are such a part of his life. This presents a number of starter opportunities... A pair of bark children could be captured and put in a pet store, and your muse can set them free and let them lead them to their home. Or, your muse could be wandering near to a Troll Market entrance and encounter a pair, and decide to follow them. In other words, bark children can either directly or indirectly lead your muse to Nuada for various reasons.

If your muse is non-human or would be able to access the Troll Market with magic and gain entrance, they could hear about Nuada from the bark children or the Archivist. Maybe they go looking for him for some reason?

He could be injured and need help. If you’ve written with me at all, you know how I love the classic “I could die if you don’t help me” starters for threads, heh. Being shot by police in the city is a very likely thing that might happen to him. Or whatever injury situation we could think of is also fine. Fair warning that he would be grumpy in this situation. Or... your muse could be injured and if they’re of a race Nuada would be sympathetic toward, or he’s just having a bout of rare empathy for a human. He would likely take your muse to his home beneath the Market to watch them. He can’t heal, so he’d have to treat the wound and then just... wait. Makes for interesting conversation, heh.

Fun facts & Colorful Information: 

Nuada’s and Nuala’s facial scars were given to them as infants. They designate them as royalty. Nuada was actually going to receive them first, since he is the eldest, but then they manifested on Nuala’s face automatically as a result of their supernatural somatic link. That was how Balor and Elunae found out their twins were two halves of one soul, or one soul split into two bodies. Them being born with this rare condition was seen as a potential curse or blessing from the gods, yet to be determined.

The darker coloration around Nuada’s eyes and lips compared to Nuala and others of his kind is indicative of the corruption that has taken hold of him. He is literally being poisoned by the negative energy of the dark path he’s chosen to go down. Negative emotions, evil, cruelty, a lack of mercy, and lapses in moral judgement are slowly poisoning him, both mentally and physically. This corruption affects his physical health as well as his personality and decisions, and is very similar to that experienced by Wanda Maximoff (1, 2) in the MCU.

Nuada was very close with his mother. When he left in exile, he took with him his mother’s wedding necklace, once a gift from his father to his mother on their wedding night.

Three reasons why Nuada might be pushed to violence.

I once did a rudimentary analysis of Nuada’s living space underneath the Troll Market, looking at everything he keeps/stores there. You can find it here.

If you want to know what Nuada thinks about fictional depictions of elves by humans in popular media, or his opinion on wandering about on Halloween, you can read about those topics here.

On the subject of human items being sold in the Troll Market and the general diversity to be found there: 1, 2

Nuada and Mr. Wink looking at human billboards

Nuada and Mr. Wink taking in the sight of the elves’ “home”

Muse Playlist: These are songs that I have used and turned to countless times for writing inspiration, many of which I’ve been associating with Nuada for many years. Some of them are related to the movie in some way or have had music videos set to clips of it that I’ve linked to, but most are just songs with lyrics that fit his mindset, the mood, or various situations perfectly. 

Hellboy II Trailer Song / Reminds me of a quote from Nuada: “Let this remind you why you once feared the dark.”: “Mein Herz Brennt” - Rammstein (it’s in German, so here are the translated lyrics)

Main Theme Song: “Mordred’s Lullaby” - Heather Dale

The Golden Army: “Invincible” - Two Steps From Hell

Determination: “I Will Not Bow” - Breaking Benjamin / H320 dubstep cover version

Ancient Battles: “Heart of Courage” - Two Steps From Hell

Exile / Savior Complex: “Torn” - Creed

Pride: "Live Free or Let Me Die” - Skillet

Arrogance: “Fireproof” - Pillar

Anger At His Father and Sister: “Numb” - Linkin Park

Relaxed: “Kindred” - Jillian Goldin

Thinking/Meditation: “Nothing Else Matters” - Metallica

Pensiveness: “Winternight” - Visions of Atlantis

Sadness / Brokenhearted: The Old Ways - Loreena McKennitt

The Old Religions: All Souls Night -  Loreena McKennitt

Heritage: “Ancestors” - Albannach

Wildness: “Beat the Speed of Sound” - Emmelie de Forest

United/Determined Twins: “Awake and Alive” - Skillet

Divided/Adversarial Twins: What Have You Done? - Within Temptation

Breakdown/Downward Spiral: “Let Go” - Frou Frou (Imogen Heap)

Failure/Defeat: “Failure” - Breaking Benjamin

Final Battle: “Blow Me Away” - Breaking Benjamin

[ink-and-flame]

Kinktober Day 1: The Violet Snail

Kinktober Day 1 Prompts: Cum Inflation (fantasy)~Gang-bang~Prostitution (actual)

Fandom: Warcraft

Tags: Prostitution, Gang Bang, Cum Inflation, Size Difference, weird dicks,  slight m/m, anal sex,

Pairing:  OrcM/GoblinM/DwarfF/WorgenM/NagaM

[Author's Note: I don’t really play Hearthstone anymore and do not have anything from the Mean Streets of Gadgetzan collection, but I like the idea of the premise. I see it as a sort of semi modernized noir sort of setting within Warcraft, so that is where this little story is going to be based. If I get anything wrong about the setting it is not intentional, I just haven’t read everything from the wiki on it yet.]

Nestled back on a dark street surrounded by bars and shops was a large almost unassuming building with a bright glowing purple sign. The Violet Snail was a popular tavern, mostly because it was also a brothel and had some of the best brews and entertainment to be had this side of Gadgetzan. The owners of the the tavern were a goblin and a dwarf. The goblin ran the brothel side of things, and the dwarf kept the tavern running and always stocked with brew.

Tonight's crowd was rowdy as always, but it was rare for fights to start here. There were strict rules and no one wanted to get banned, not even on a temporary basis. If they weren’t addicted to the entertainment, then it was the unique brews and snacks the bar offered. Tulvir, the dwarven owner, went out of his way to source unique brews from all over Azeroth, having many imported from far away isles. Standard dwarven brews were a staple on the menu, but the exotic brews were what kept people coming back. Always curious what would be new on the menu.

Tulvir did the same with food. Sourcing recipes from all over and working with the cooks to determine what would work and what wouldn’t. Not all food made good bar food and even some of the most delicious recipes didn’t make the cut just because they were too complicated to serve to drunk people. It also came down to ingredients, if it wasn’t something that could be reliably sourced, it wasn’t considered. 

Maggie, on the other hand, dealt with the entertainment and ran the brothel portion of the tavern. The whole upstairs was dedicated to it and she had her work cut out for her most nights. The set up was clever. A patron could put in their requests downstairs, pick from a book if they were inclined to something specific. Prices were negotiated, and when the room was available they were escorted up. No one got upstairs without an escort. This kept the talent and the patrons safe. 

Business was good, the crowd was a bit loud but joyful. They were being entertained by some dancers as booze was sold in bulk. The kitchen was not quite overwhelmed but working at a steady pace. It was nice to see, and Maggie knew it would be a profitable night. She eyed a couple of the tables, wondering which groups would end up looking to buy some company and head upstairs. If she were a betting woman she would be certain the table of orcs would be the first to ask for the book. To her surprise, it was the mixed table that requested it. An odd group to be sure, but there really wasn’t anything she hadn’t seen here in Gadgetzan. The naga was a little different, but he wasn’t the first she had seen in their tavern, it was just a rare occurrence. 

Stepping over to the table she addressed them “Finding anything you like, we are running a couple of specials this week. We have a deal where if you book two girls the second is half rate, and we have a 25% discount on group scenes. Let me know what you are interested in.” Maggie stepped away to let them converse amongst themselves. The specials never impacted the talent, anything taken off came from the house side and rarely did it affect profits. 

Glyx glanced sideways at Corbin while Vosh continued to flip through the book. "So, just wanna get two girls to double team?" he said to what was a near uncomfortably long silence. It was a stark contrast to how they were in the tavern a few hours prior.

"I'm fine with whatever. One gal, a couple, one for each." Corbin finally answered to break the pregnant pause, looking over to the orc who still thumbed through the pages. He went through it twice, and now was on his third. If there was ever a more selective person than Vosh, Corbin hadn't met them yet.

"It would be easier if I was paired with someone less… easy to unnerve." Nalzas said, his eyes sitting on Corbin with a not so subtle implication. "Will you be staying as a human, or shifting?" The naga asked curiously. Corbin was probably the most relaxed individual Zas had ever known. A very go with the flow type, but he was dangerous when his mood shifted, as rare as the situation was.

"Vosh. Vosh, pal, buddy, Vosh. Dude. Pick. Please. We don't have all night, I definitely don't got all night, and I'm pretty sure we don't have the coin for one of each." Glyx' large green ear flicked, annoyance clear on him as he was about ready to to swipe the book from their very picky friend, and pick at random.

The orc glared at the goblin, and as his hands lifted, the book was shoved over into the hands of Corbin. "Here, you can choose. We aren't exactly a normal group, and I doubt you could ask some gnome to take what we have going on."

Corbin just took it with little more than a hum, flipping pages faster than Vosh was doing. Unlike Vosh, he actually had considered their differences, and what would be exciting for them. It was easy enough to pass over several options, and with a few details to look through the profiles, it took him a great deal quicker to settle on a woman that looked interesting to him. "So." He finally said looking up. "How do you all feel about a dwarf?"

Glyx got a little gleam in his eye “Oh, I do like dwarves. They fit the whole ‘taller’n me’ thing without bein so tall that it’s a pain in the ass. She cute?” The goblin tugged the book away from Corbin and glanced at the picture. Oh yeah, she was cute. Just the kind of girl he would have hit on naturally. Clearly his friend knew what he liked. It was Vosh, the ever picky one, that needed to agree. 

“What say you Vosh, ya like?” Glyx pushed the book towards the orc and glanced over to Zas. “you good with a dwarf lady, not gonna be a problem fer, eh, yer junk?” Nalzas narrowed his slitted eyes at Glyx. “Oh honestly Glyx, so crass. I am fine as long as they are. Dwarvish women tend to be rather sturdy, so I haven’t really had any issues, though it was only the one time. I am sure we can all make it work as long as Vosh is interested.”

“Yeah, it works. She looks fun, profile fits our needs. Nothing popping out at me that could be an issue. I like her red hair.” Sometimes being picky paid off, and sometimes it caused situations like this. Vosh knew it drove his friends nuts, but it was just how he was. When it came to non orcish women, he was exceedingly picky and refused to apologize for it. 

Turning around he waved the goblin lady over, it would suck if they went through all this and she wasn’t even available. “Her, uh, Branwen? Yeah, her name shows as Branwen. She free? It would be all four of us.”

Maggie took the book back and nodded.  “Yes, Branwen is available. I will have security take you up to the room and she will be brought in after you read over the rules for the room. Enjoy your time gentlemen.” Maggie gestured for them to follow the large serious looking orcs standing near the stairs. 

Corbin picked up the little booklet with the rules and began reviewing them as the others got settled, reading aloud anything that he thought the others needed to know. It was standard stuff really. Mostly to protect the talent and to prevent harm to everyone involved. “Seems basic, I mean if I was looking for some of the more extreme stuff I certainly would not have come here. Glyx, that means you are going to have to reign it in a bit until we know how much this girl can handle your mouth.”

“I am hurt and offended Cor, that you would besmirch my very character with such slander.” Glyx stated in the most clear and enunciated speech they had ever heard, his accent completely gone for that moment. He was, of course, being sarcastic, but it did hit home as the others began laughing.

“Just, tone down the dirty talk until we know she is into it ok?” Corbin rolled his eyes and got comfortable with the others as they waited for the woman to arrive, which she did in short order, and she was far more beautiful than her picture had shown. 

“Well, look at this lot. I’m Branwen, looks like I have quite the selection tonight.” She smiled at the men and was intrigued to see such an unusual group. The orc and goblin she expected, but the human and naga were curious. Still, you got all types here and she wasn’t going to question it. As long as they followed the rules, this was going to be fun. “So, who’s first, or all at once?”

Corbin stepped up, wanting to take the lead to make sure everyone got what they wanted from the evening. “Whatever is going to be easier to start with for you. I know Glyx is quite excited, but Nalzas here is a little nervous.” He gestured to the goblin and naga in turn. “Also, full disclosure, but I am a worgen. I can stay in human form if that is less strange for you. I know not everyone is, well, into it.”

Branwen looked a bit confused. Worgen were rare in these parts. They showed up, but tended not to be seen much on this side of town, so this would be a first. She wasn’t sure what he was getting at until something tickled at her thoughts. “Strange? I, hmm, ye wouldn’t mean that somethin is different?” She had heard rumors that some worgen not only were incredibly hung, but had odd shaped or knotted dicks. When the man flushed she smirked and decided to test the waters with how playful she could get with this group. “Are ye insinuatin that yer a bit… knotty?”

At this, Corbin was bright red, his face in his hands, and both Vosh and Glyx were howling with laughter. “Oh, oh I like her, she is a keeper!” Glyx chimed in and sauntered up to the dwarf. “Sweetie, I promise we are gonna make yer night it ya let us. With humor like that, this was meant to be. So, who first?”

“Why don’t we start on the bed. All holes are available as long as yer willin to use lube. No slidin in the back door dry loves, we’ll have none of that.” Branwen stripped off her simple dress. She hadn’t worn anything underneath, she assumed with a group session they would want to get to it and not waste too much time.

Hopping up on the bed she waited for them to finish talking amongst themselves and was not shocked that the goblin crawled up on the bed first. He was quite handsome. Dark hair, bright eyes, light green skin, and more well hung than she was expecting. He winked at her as he grabbed the lube. “Hope ya don’t mind me knockin on the back door ta start?” 

“What position would make this easier?” Branwen paused as the orc slid onto the bed and lifted her in the air, turning her to face him and placing her on his lap. 

“Ride me? That way Glyx can stand up and we don’t have to worry about hurting you.” Vosh pushed some loose strands of hair from her face, stroking her cheek with a knuckle. “That, and I want to see your face. Condom or no?”

Branwen flushed at the attention, she was not expecting this. The orc was the one she was worried about. He looked so angry, but now, there was this tenderness in his eyes she had not expected and she found herself feeling some sort of way about it. She shook her head. Condoms would not be needed. She had taken her preventatives so pregnancy shouldn’t be an issue and they had a healer on staff just in case someone caught something. She had charms as well to help prevent anything unwanted getting into her system.

“Beautiful. We’ll start slow, but you never answered our friend Corbin over there. Human form or full worgen?” Vosh wanted to make sure that consent was clear before things started and the heat of the moment could change minds. He wanted her clear headed for this choice.

“I’m curious, so let's go worgen.” Branwen smiled over at Corbin who was still flushed. Though, she had not expected for him to shift right then, and oh was he quite large. Though his blue eyes still seemed so kind even if his face was now a little more frightening. 

Vosh ended up distracting her when she felt herself lifted into the air and something nudged at her entrance. She locked eyes with his as he pushed in, her’s closing first. The stretch was something, it burned just a bit, but in a good way. That good feeling just kept coming as she slowly took more and more of him in. She wasn’t sure it would fit at first, and now she was hoping to take all of him. That stretch started to feel a little too good and it was taking a lot of will power for her to sit still.

Branwen opened her eyes when she felt the bed move and saw that the worgen had joined them, off to the side a bit. It was a good thing all the furniture had been double reinforced last year. After a selection of furniture had broken, the bosses paid more to have better stuff built. Hopefully it would hold up with this group. “You ok there lovely?” Vosh asked in a deep rumbly voice, it was quiet, not quite a whisper, but close. He had turned her face to his and was looking at her with concern.

“Yes, just staying relaxed. You are bigger than I thought, trying not to get too excited. Wouldn’t want this to be over before it starts.” She smirked at the orc as she felt large hands on her hips and a warm slick nudge between her cheeks, glancing back over her shoulder she nodded at Glyx, letting him know he could go ahead. She wasn’t sure if he was hesitating for any particular reason, but sometimes reaffirming her consent helped.

“Ya got a great ass beautiful, just want ta make sure yer ready for it.” Glyx pushed his hips forward carefully, keeping the lube nearby to add more as needed. He wasn’t all that into causing pain. Yeah he was kinky, but this wasn’t really the time for it. Adding a bit more lube the goblin pushed just a bit more til he felt her relax a bit as was able to get a couple inches in. Biting back a groan and forcing himself to pause he just stood there for a moment to center himself and calm just a bit. 

Corbin and Nalzas watched as their friends found a nice rhythm. Zas slithered over to the bed pushing up on his coils to be taller. Both of his cocks were out, slick with arousal and he caught Branwens curious eyes. Smiling gently at her shocked expression. He wasn’t sure how this would work out for him, but even just watching was enough sometimes. 

Branwen glanced towards Corbin and saw that he too was erect and he indeed did have a rather large dick with a noticeable knot in it. It wasn’t too large one she was certain she could take if she tried, but she was curious how he tasted. “If’n ya lean up here, I could suck ye off.” She offered and caught the glances between the orc and worgen. If they were communicating she was unaware but something must have been agreed upon as she felt a gentle hand on the back of her head as he lifted up on his knees. 

“Only take as much as you feel safe doing. Trust me, it will feel good regardless.” Corbin teased her lips with the tip of his cock and sucked in a sharp breath as she eagerly took him into her mouth. He had anticipated that she would be nervous, hesitant even, but no, she was already almost to the knot and he was finding it difficult to keep control.

Nalzas watched as the group found their rhythm, moving as one. It was strange and beautiful at the same time. His friends knew his proclivities and had not expressed any problems with them in the past, so he helped himself. Leaning down he wiggled closer, his long tongue flicking out to tease Branwen’s clit. He tasted both her and Vosh, it was delightful. Snaking his tongue out farther he teased and flicked along her slit and back to her clit. Vosh didn’t indicate any discomfort so he continued, his tongue teasing both on occasion, but mostly focusing on Branwen. She tasted lovely and he considered paying for a private session with her if she would allow it.

Branwen was almost delirious with pleasure. She felt incredible. Every part of her body was tingling. She was almost overwhelmed with it all. The snake tongue had been a surprise, but a welcome one and she had all intentions of exploring that more later. For now she was getting close to that edge, the only thing helping her stave off an orgasm was her focus. The cock in her mouth was just a little too big and she had to concentrate on her breathing to make sure she didn’t get too light headed, oh it was glorious though. So thick and musky, she wanted to take that knot, but simply wasn’t able to. Not yet, maybe she could convince this group to become regulars. 

Glyx was the first to reach orgasm. Crying out sharply as he fought the urge to bite Branwen. She felt so good, so tight, and he continued to thrust through his orgasm, drawing out every bit of pleasure he could. They were going to go broke, he just knew it. She had enchanted the whole group, he was certain of it, and honestly wasn’t going to complain, at least not yet. 

Corbin followed with a sharp moan that started to transition into a howl. He pulled back, not wanting to accidentally choke or drown Branwen with his cum. He barely managed to miss her face and his friends, who would have been annoyed but most likely would have forgiven him. Stroking himself the rest of the way through his orgasm, squeezing his knot in a way that made his toes curl. If she was up for more, he very much wanted a ride. Panting he backed off a bit to give the others space. 

Branwen came hard, her core clenching around Vosh’s cock, as the orc followed close after. Nalzas pulled back allowing them to cum together. It was almost sweet, they looked like they belonged. He was a softy and a bit of a romantic at times, but there was something about this woman that seemed to have enchanted all of them. He helped brace her and pulled her gently off of Vosh, settling her safely in his coils to rest. 

It took Branwen a few minutes to come back to her senses and she found herself enjoying the feeling of scales against her skin. She looked up at the naga curiously. “Ye know, yer the only one that didn’t get a happy endin, it would be a damn shame ta leave it like that.”

Zas laughed, a slight hiss in his voice. “Only, if you are certain. One or both?”

“Oh, it had better be both ye sweet serpent. I got two holes.” She glanced at the bed, “Oi, be a sport and toss us the lube will ye?”

Glyx chuckled heartily and shrugged before tossing the lube. “A’ight. Lemme get my pants on, I’ll go pay fer another hour. Eh, lets make it two.”

[mrultra100]

Johnny Test: Primal Eternity: Show Concept

What’s the Story about?

Johnny Test: Primal Eternity takes place on an Earth that is inhabited by not only mankind, but also monsters; Vampires, kaiju, werebeasts, yokai, mutants, and other such creatures share the world with humans, and have been for centuries. As the basis for various myths and legends all over the world, many of these supernatural beings have either been feared, awed, or loathed by man, and vice-versa. This general connection between the two factions would led to not only a closer understanding between the two, but also a shared co-existence. The world at large is full of monsters, and one of the biggest melting pots/ hotspots for the supernatural to pop up is the main setting of this show; Porkbelly, Oregon.

Nestled within the primordial wilderness of the Pacific Northwest, Porkbelly has always been a town steeped with history, nature, and culture shared by both man and monster alike, resulting in a beautiful, yet dangerous and wild world to live in. In order to maintain that balance between the two races, a team of heroes known as The Beastly 4 (Johnny, Dukey, Maryanna, and Susanic) protect Porkbelly from any threat, man or monster. While the show is mostly episodic, showing off the various missions and shenanigans that The Beastly 4 get into, there is a central lore within the world, showcasing the history of Porkbelly in all of its detail.

Who are the main characters?

The show, while having a big cast of characters similar to the original Johnny Test, is mainly focused on 4 main characters; Johnny, Dukey, and the Vampire Twins. These 4 are the heart of the show, focusing on their personalities, backstories, flaws, etc.

Johnny- (Played by James Arnold Taylor) The leader of The Beastly 4, and the main character. While the rest of his team (along with the town in general) are monsters, Johnny is the only human of the main group. A human with super soldier-like qualities, sure, but a human nonetheless. Thanks to being a willing test subject for his sisters’ experiments for years, Johnny has developed his own powers, and right in his college years too. From having incredible resistance to the elements, agility, strength, and even the ability to be a living lightning rod that’s powered by electricity, Johnny is no normal guy. And he uses it well in the form of his superhero alias; J-X. Unlike the original incarnation of Johnny X being some basic superhero, J-X is based on Kamen Rider, Ultraman, and other tokusatsu heroes, having not only a suit similar to the likes of Armored Rider Gaim, but also wind/storm-based powers and equipment. Spunky, a bit extroverted, and ready for anything, Johnny is always ready for anything, but his main flaw comes in the form of his recklessness and being inpatient, sometimes doing things before he thinks. He also has to deal with his insecurities of standing out in a world of fantastical beings, along with taking on the responsibilities of being a good leader.

Dukey- (Played by Trevor Devall) The muscle of the group, and Johnny’s best friend. Dukey was once a normal dog that was scientifically modded by the Vampire Twins in their younger years to not only talk, but also serve as a test subject for the military to make their own weapon against rogue kaiju. After he was suddenly thrusted into a new and dangerous life, Dukey was adopted by the Test family, where he serves as a protector. Despite his massive size, Dukey is a kaiju that likes the finer things in life; coffee, steak, an appreciation for musical theater, and being rather flamboyant at times. Dukey is based on a few kaiju, with King Caesar, Baragon, and Singular Point Anguirus being the most prominent examples. The list of attacks in Dukey’s arsenal include super strength and durability, a powerful beam attack from his jaws, razor sharp claws and a powerful bite, a sort of sonic howl-like roar, rolling into a spiky ball, and can even dig underground to deliver devastating ambush attacks. Despite his love of fighting, Dukey has a history of trauma back when he was first mutated into a kaiju, having to suddenly fight against some nasty beasties who are the opposite of his classy tastes and mannerisms. Hence why he can freak out when an especially strong opponent that even he can’t overpower shows up.

Maryanna- (Played by Natasia Demetriou) The paleonerd of the crew. Averaging at around 7 feet tall, along with having an alluring physique (Large hourglass figure, along with a chubby belly), Mary is one of the most beautiful vampires in Porkbelly, and she knows it. Often levelheaded, yet sassy, frisky, chaotic, theatrical, and even a bit lewd at times, along with being a confident bisexual, Mary is a fun lady to be around. Being big on horror and paleontology, Mary has developed a love for nature and things that go bump in the night, which extends to her pride and joy of being a vampire. The vampires in Porkbelly all have a shared honor of their monsterhood, but Mary takes that to eleven, often colliding with her love of singing, and even coming up with a fun nickname for her in the form of “Queen of the Vampires”. Just like the rest of her species, Mary and her sister have a variety of powers which include flight, bat transformations, hypnosis, turning people via biting them, super speed and strength, prehensile hair, living shadows that are extensions of their primordial souls, etc. The most insane ability in Mary’s arsenal is her control over electricity. Powers like electrically-charged hip checks, claw slashes, and bites, electromagnetic telekinesis, and using her own ponytail as an electrified kanabo are all examples of Mary’s power. Mary’s main flaw, aside from her ego, is how she can be too excited and nymphomaniac, resulting from how she was a shy and quiet girl in her childhood, taking on the wonders and thrills of the world the first moment that she got.

Susanic- (Played by Cassandra Lee Morris) The brains of the operation. While she’s not as tall or curvy as her twin sister, Susan makes for that by being very buff and athletic. Aside from putting it to good use during missions, Susan has a whole career of being a beloved heel wrestler, The Infernal Star. Similar to Mary and her electric powers, Susan’s element of choice is fire, which such attacks including will-o-wisps, causing whole explosions with her mere fists, clocking herself in flames to make herself faster while in flight, and even firing a superheated beam of heat from her jaws. Unlike their original incarnations, which were extremely shallow and one-note, the PE Vampire Twins are full of personality, with Susan being a stern hothead. And also unlike the original series, Susan and Gil’s relationship with each other is alot more stable, with the latter being madly in love with the former. Susan’s most prominent flaw is her temper, having to control her emotions when someone ticks her off, including Bling Bling Boy. Both Susan and Mary belong to a species of vampire referred to as the Northwestern Strigoi (or Nocturoptitan sanguinarius, the species’ scientific name).

What are the themes and goals presented here?

The main goal of Primal Eternity is to create a far-better version of Johnny Test than what the original series and its 2021 revival were. In the case of the former, that was nothing more than a cheap, stretched-out, boring, generic, by-the-numbers, action cartoon from the mid 2000’s that was promising when it first aired on Kids’ WB, but gradually devolved into bland slop over the years, with the 2021 revival being silently swept under the ground by Netflix and canceled only after 2 seasons. The biggest improvements that this franchise needs are better-written characters, a much more detailed, creative, and expressive world, and especially better writing. The exact kind of writing that I imagine that this reboot would have would be a mix of both episodic and serialized shows. JT: PE would be episodic for the most part, similar to the original series. However, unlike the latter, the former would have a strong continuity holding everything together. Another good example of these goals are how the characters are written, especially the main four. The original versions of Johnny, Dukey, and the Test Twins can only be written in the following way back in the original show. Keep in mind, the notes presented below mainly apply to how the 4 were in later seasons, with Dukey being the best written throughout the entire run of the series.

Johnny- While he is a decent hero in his own right, Johnny is oftentimes a textbox example of a bratty and annoying nuisance. A designated “Totally Rad” type of character meant to appeal to kids without doing anything creative to make him stand out.

Dukey- Admittingly, Dukey was the best example of a character in this series who was written very well, aside from a few hiccups here and there.

Test Twins- Frankly the characters who were the biggest victims of the original show’s poor writing. They only love Gil because “He’s hot!”, and nothing else. They’re bland and one-dimensional at best, and just straight-up unlikable on the other end of the spectrum (Sonic Johnny, anyone?). Mary is especially relevant on this, as Susan was the only one to get most of, if not all of the attention in the original show. Going back to their appearance as vampires in Fangs a Lot Johnny, they were nothing but a couple of Twilight knock-offs that barely ever changed from their original forms.

Aside from Dukey (and a few other characters), the cast of Johnny Test is mostly flat, being nothing more than basic cartoon character archetypes that the showrunners just refused to work on in terms of character development and growth other than the bare minimum. And this extends to how the show, especially during its later seasons, just FELT cheap and generic. The toys and the 2011 DS game can certainly share that part ALONE. And this extends to things like character designs being uninspired and stupid-looking, the music not having any creativity and charm to it (Think of this part like how the show keeps playing the same repetitive cues over and over again), most of the characters being bland and unlikable caricatures, and episode ideas being used over and over again. It’s gotten so bad, the 2021 revival was silently canceled by Netflix shortly after its second season. Could it be possible that it would’ve gotten another season? Sure, it would, given how JT was, surprisingly enough, one of the top 10 most watched cartoons of 2020 on the service. But, for everything that it did right, the revival was doomed to fail, because of how stretched-out and cheap its predecessor was.

With all of that in mind, the goal of this reboot is to completely overhaul Johnny Test as a franchise, making it better with stronger writing, more expressive and complex characters, and a grander view and feel for what their world is like, which is where the 3 major themes of this show come into the fray.

Nature (The characters living in an really ancient part of the world, with a good portion of the villains and other threats in the show being a problem to said ancient part of the world)

Love (Learning to love the weird and unconventional parts of who you are as a person, which is something many characters either know or have to learn)

Unity (No matter the race, people have to work, stand, and fight together as one whenever a threat rears its ugly head)

With all of that said, not only would this reboot have themes that help flesh it out, it would also relate back to The Beastly 4, as they have traits that correlate back to the themes presented here. The Beastly 4 being a group of different beings working and living together to protect the home that they love, along with how the residents of Porkbelly treat nature with respect,  and the Vampire Twins loving and embracing their vampirism with pure joy are all examples of those themes. And going back to them, the main 4 presented here have plenty of characters from other media that I’ve used for their designs, personalities, etc.

Johnny- Leonardo (Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles), Ben Tennyson (Ben 10: Omniverse), Armored Rider Gaim (Kamen Rider Gaim), Kyojuro Rengoku (Demon Slayer)

Dukey- Grimlock (Transformers: Robots in Disguise), King Caesar (Godzilla), Anguirus (Godzilla: Singular Point), Seismo (Mixels), Baragon (Godzilla) Onua (Bionicle G2), Donkey Kong (Donkey Kong Country)

Maryanna- Bayonetta, Godzilla (Monsterverse canon), Wilhamena (OK K.O.! Let’s Be Heroes), Nurse Worse (Dr. Crafty), Morrigan Aensland (Darkstalkers), Charlie Morningstar (Hazbin Hotel), Shantae, Miia (Monster Musume)

Susanic- Juri Han (Street Fighter), Vaggie (Hazbin Hotel), Shin Godzilla, Blaze the Cat (Sonic the Hedgehog), Missi Spiderwebs (The Vampair)

Another point about the themes of this reboot that should be brought up is the setting. Porkbelly is set in Oregon, which is a part of the greater Pacific Northwest. Being one of the oldest coasts in the world, the western coast of North America has had plenty of rich history throughout the eons. Alongside the mountains of history and culture that the Pacific Northwest has, it was also home to various creatures, habitats, and other natural phenomena over millions of years. Things like shark-bitten camels, gigantic ammonites and other marine megafauna, polar dinosaurs, various Cambrian weirdos, and other such beasties have all been found in rocks ranging from California, right up to Alaska. And modern-day Oregon is home to plenty of diverse environments too. Things like temperate rainforests, sand dunes, swamps, caves and lava tubes, mountainous regions, and various deep-sea trenches are all examples of the ecosystems that Oregon is home to. And given how the original Johnny Test actually showed locations like deserts, forests, mountains, etc (The former being shown in Johnny B.C.), it wouldn’t be much of a stretch to suggest that Porkbelly is located in the Pacific Northwest.

All and all, the themes and ideas that this reboot has would help Johnny Test, as a franchise, improve for the better. This is nothing more than ideas for a reboot of a cartoon that doesn’t actually exist, but it would be neat if something like it did happen in real life. And my horrid lil’ head still has some many ideas that I wanna put in for JT: PE. The main cast has almost been fully realized, but I need to get my mind mentally prepared for when I get around to drawing them. I still have Johnny and Dukey’s designs to look forward to, so expect to see them soon.

I really have no idea on how to end this thing, so I’m just gonna add this dumb meme of mine here.

[beepboopkek]

— Strip Starchess with Jing Yuan (Male Reader)

Including: Jing Yuan cw: !! NSFW !!, amab!reader, pwp but barely, n1pple play, slight mention of reader having a size kink, unprotected p in a??, first time writing a proper fic, first time writing smut (please send help), reader is a little bashful, overall its kind of a self-projection I guess. Jing Yuan is a little bastard (affectionate), stripping (who would've guessed), grammatical errors(I tried), Jing Yuan calls you pet names (dear, love), no use of y/n / m/n , light bondage ( reader gets their hands tied with a t-shirt nothing too bad), safe sane and consensual w/c: 3914 (might be a little off since I made a few edits in this post) a/n: the same as the fem reader one, it's just poor writing to let my demons out, this was originally planned as an m!reader fic but I changed it to f!reader but now I'm back here again haha.. anywyas I hope someone out there likes this !!

You were bored. Extremely bored.

Jing Yuan had promised you he’d come home on time so that the two of you could enjoy dinner together. You had something fun planned for the evening for the two of you. Something you were excited to try out. One problem though, there were still no signs of your boyfriend’s arrival.

You sent him a few messages asking him where he was but to no avail, you knew for a fact he wouldn’t be able to respond anyway.

The sound of a door opening broke you out of your thoughts as you turned around and were met with an apologetic soft smile on Jing Yuan’s face. “Yu.” “My Love.” You huffed at him in annoyance, realising what he was trying to do. He always knew how to soften you up. “You’re late.” You said as you watched him unstrap his boots and place them near the shoe rack before he turned to look at you. “I apologize, I overslept in the afternoon and had to compensate as a result.” Jing Yuan gave you a pitiful look. “Regardless, I am here now,” He walked over to where you were seated and leaned down to place a chaste kiss on your head. “And I’d love to eat what my dear has cooked for me.”

You rolled your eyes at him a little and turned towards the table again as he took his seat opposite to you. You began eating in silence while Jing Yuan served himself some of the food you’d made.

“C’mon, don’t be like that.” He spoke suddenly as you focused on eating and ignoring him. “Be like what? I didn’t do anything.” You huffed back to him again while continuing to look at your food when you suddenly heard the sound of a chair being dragged across the floor, you looked up, only to be met with your boyfriend’s amber eyes boring into yours. “What can I do to make it up to you?”

You grumbled something with your mouth full. “I didn’t catch that, love.”

You gulped down your food, 

“I said, play Starchess with me” “Do we not play Starchess on a regular basis already?”

“We do, yes, but I found a new variation of the game that I thought would be fun to try out. Only if youre up for it, though.” You made eye contact with him again as his eyebrow shot up in surprise.

He leaned in on the table and rested his head on the palm of his hand as he tilted his head lazily. “Go on.” Your confidence and annoyance all but vanished this exact second, you really hadn’t expected him to be this interested and knowing him , he probably already has an idea simply based off of the tone of your voice.

“...Nevermind.” You looked away, blushing as Jing Yuan continued to watch in lazed amusement. “Is it-” “Yes it’s Strip Starchess, okay? I thought it would be fun to play.” You blurted out as your ears turned a light shade of red. “I was going to say Blitz Starchess.” Your eyes widened in horror as you turned back to look at Jing Yuan who was now miserably failing at holding back his laughter as his shoulders shook silently and he pressed his lips together. “I hate you.” Jing Yuan laughed and you pouted. “I didn’t do anything, though?” “You know exactly what you're doing, Yu.” Jing Yuan smiled apologetically once again as you pouted while avoiding eye contact with him. He sighed fondly and picked up his chopsticks again. “Strip Starchess, hm? Let’s finish dinner and begin.” You huffed again and turned back to your food and soon enough, Jing Yuan started some casual conversation and the whole ordeal was pushed to the back of your mind.

. . .That was until after you both finished eating and cleaning up.

Shit.

You suddenly had very important things to do in your library so you quietly started walking towards it, hoping Jing Yuan had all but forgotten about your earlier conversation. Just as you were about to open the door, a familiar voice called out from behind you,

"Dear?" 

You slowly turned around, trying not to look like you were caught committing a crime.

"...Yes?"

"Where would you like to play? I think the living room would be best since it is rather spacious. We can close the curtains but,"

Jing Yuan paused as he looked towards the box in his hands and back to you,

"I'm saying that while assuming that we will be taking off our clothes sooner or later. Am I wrong?" 

He smiled innocently. This bastard knew exactly what he was doing.

"... Fine, let's go to the living room then, I'll explain the rules to you." 

Jing Yuan hummed pleasantly as he walked behind you, setting the board down onto the hard wooden flooring as the both of you sat down facing each other. 

He opened up the box and set up the game and looked at you expectantly.

There was no backing out now, so you might as well give it your best.

"It's in the name, you strip when you lose a pawn." 

"Strip entirely? Or just an article of clothing?"

"You know exactly what I mean."

You gave an exasperated sigh as you stared at him with the grumpiest expression you could muster.

"I'm afraid I don't, love."

He gave you a cat-like smile as he patiently waited for you to explain.

"...Only a piece of clothing. The one who has the most clothes off at the end of the game is the loser,"

You made yourself comfortable, you need your initial confidence back desperately.

"We'll play 3 games and see who wins. I won't be going easy on you."

You smiled at him mischievously as he chuckled and re-adjusted his seating position before looking right into your eyes.

"Very well then, let the games begin." 

You focused your eyes on the board and played your first move, positioning the soldier pawn in front of your king 2 steps ahead. Jing Yuan’s eyes lit up as he countered it by moving the same piece on his side. He knew exactly how you were going to play and he was going to ensure he won. The game progressed and you eventually lost your first pawn, you sighed in annoyance at the realization as you looked up to see your boyfriend with his cat-like smile and of course, he had the most innocent look on his face. Damnit. You sighed reluctantly as you cursed him under your breath and removed your jacket. “Happy?” You deadpanned at him.

“Very much so. Don’t be upset, you still have a chance to win.” He smirked lazily as he waited for you to play your turn You were more cautious now, not letting him take any of your pawns when you realized you had a safe opening to take his pawn! You took the chance and took his soldier with your bishop. Looking up at him in triumph. He smiled back at you casually as he raised his hands in surrender, “You got me there,” You watched him in anticipation as your mouth watered a little, sure you’d been living together for a few months now but, nothing beat seeing Jing Yuan’s body. He place his hand on his shoulder guard and removed it before smiling at you pleasantly again. You blinked once.

Twice.

Scanning him to see if he removed anything else while you were day-dreaming. Nope, nothing.

"I said one piece of clothing, your shoulder brace doesn't count as one." 

"You never specified if accessories were also counted."

You huffed at him, "You never asked!" 

"I don't recall having to ask, I gave you the chance to explain everything to me." He smiled innocently again.

He was right. 

He knew he was and continued to play his next move.

Bastard.

Suddenly, it dawned on you that he was still in his armor and work uniform, meaning it would take at least 15 individual games of Starchess to get even the first layer off of him. Your eyes widened in realization as he looked at you and stifled his laughter.

Well, you certainly weren't in your work clothes and barely had anything on in the first place but you might have a few accessories on your person if you looked hard enough.

Two can play that game.

The game continued as you tried your best to defend your pieces from his attacks but he was too good… much to your displeasure.

By the end of the first game, Jing Yuan barely looked any different from how he was when he entered your shared home while you had to remove your own rings and piercings, putting them away in a corner neatly as to not lose them.

Jing Yuan won the first game by the rules of normal Starchess and the two of began your second round.

You were determined, but so was he.

Time passed rather quickly as you watched your boyfriend remove more accessories and you really wondered how he was able to walk or even fight with that much on his body.

You shook your head. Now's not the time for distractions.

The game progressed as you watched your pawns get taken one by one.

Rook, Bishop, a couple of soldiers and the list went on.

…You realized very late that you were going to lose.

You've never beat him in a game of starches, partially because he sneaks away your pieces but also because he's genuinely skilled at playing the game.

You were down to your last game, Jing Yuan in his shirt and pants along with some random trinkets of his uniform that you didn't even know the purpose of, you, however, were a different story.

You'd managed to get down just to your t-shirt and boxers, shivering a little in both anticipation and the chill of the night.

“Do you need a blanket? You won't have anything to cover you soon enough, I'd hate to get you sick, dear.” Jing Yuan looked at you lazily.

Bastard.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

“I'm good. This is the last game and by the look of it, you've lost more pieces than I have.”

He made a content noise in the back of his throat as if agreeing with you before looking down at the board and smiling.

“I'm afraid you are correct, I admire your confidence in the face of calamity. However,”

He moved his bishop in line with your king.

“Checkmate.” 

You glanced around the board, trying to find an escape route but there were none. 

There was no denying it, you had lost the third game as well.

But the rules were about clothes, you looked up at him and back at yourself.

“. . . Fuck.”

You sighed, reluctantly admitting defeat.

“Alright , alright. You win the three games and the whole game considering you have more layers on you than I do.” 

Jing Yuan smiled in amusement as he crossed his arms and tilted his head slightly,

“So, what's my reward for winning?” 

You were already packing up the board as you looked at him with a huff and stood up.

“I'll let you nap in the afternoon more tomorrow, that's your reward.” 

But before you could move your half naked self away, Jing Yuan moved closer and swiftly knocked your knees back so you toppled down onto him.

“Jing Yuan! I almost knocked the board on your head!”

You had wrapped your arms around his neck, scared to lose balance and plop onto the floor if he were to drop you.

“I'm interested in another reward.”

“What?”

“I'm the winner so isn't it natural I get to pick my reward? Besides, no proper terms were set for it when you explained the rules to me.”

“You little shit, you knew this was going to happen.”

“Dear, I am the divine foresight for a reason.” 

He chuckled as his hands slowly moved down your torso and to the hem of your t-shirt. 

He grasped the hem as he leaned into your body and spoke lowly in your ear

“Of course, if you don't want this, we could just revert to my original reward.” 

His hold on you was firm but gentle, indicating that he'd let you go if you wanted him to.

“But, something about the way you're trembling in my hold tells me you don't want to stop, do you?” 

Your breath was coming out in shaky puffs now. You simply looked away in embarrassment before he pressed himself closer to you, you could feel the warmth of his body through the clothes he was wearing.

“Answer me.” 

“. . . I don't want you to stop” 

He smiled against your ears and you swear if he had a tail it would be swishing around in excitement by now.

“That wasn't so hard, was it?” 

Kissing the red shell of your ear he moved your face towards him and kissed you deeply before pressing his forehead to yours.

“Now, allow me to claim my reward.”

He peppered kisses along your jaw as his hands finally, finally took your t-shirt up to your neck as you raised your arms to help him get it off.

You were down to just your boxers now while Jing Yuan remained fully clothed. Bastard. Your naked chest heaved as Jing Yuan continued to feel around your body, his kisses continuing downward and his large palms squeezing around your body.

He leaned down on your chest, taking a nipple into his mouth as his other hand tweaked with the other and you gasped, sparks of pleasure shooting up your spine.

Your hands immediately found purchase in his soft hair as you closed your eyes and whispered his name.

Jing Yuan always , always made sure to lather extra attention to your chest, you never understood why but it had now become a sensitive spot for you.

He kissed and licked around your nipples, leaving little bites in between so that he can see them in the morning and fuck you all over again.

Deciding he'd done enough to your chest (for now) he moved his attention downwards, chuckling breathlessly at the small wet patch on your boxers.

His large hand slid down as he started moving his finger up and down on your boxers, making the wet patch grow bigger.

“You call me a bastard and yet have the nerve to be this turned on for me, hm?” 

“S-Shut up.” 

You panted as your brain became fuzzy and warm, not being able to think of anything else except Jing Yuan touching you.

He smirked as he added pressure with his finger on exactly where the head of your cock is and you gasped loudly. The fabric of your boxers providing a weird but not unwelcome feeling.

“Do you think you can cum just from this alone? My hands rubbing your nipples?”

“I don't k-”

You cut yourself off with a loud moan as he gently squeezed your pecs.

“You don't know? Well, that's too bad. We'll just have to find out it seems, hm?”

You were gasping for air and moaning loudly at this point, thrashing and tugging at Jing Yuan’s hair like your life depended on it.

Jing Yuan kissed you and simultaneously continued to rub circles around your perked up nipples.

You weakly slammed your fisted hands onto the hard planes of his chest but to no avail, he wasn't going to let up.

He continued flicking your nipples before speaking into your ear.

“Be a good boy and cum for me”

You moaned as you clenched his (now crumpled) white shirt in your hands as your eyes rolled back and your orgasm flooded over your body in waves.

The general continued to bite and mark your chest as you got down from your high, peppering your body with kisses.

You were still breathing heavily when you regained your senses again.

“So, my hypothesis was correct. You can come untouched, hm?” 

“You're gonna pay for that, Yu.”.

“Do your worst, dear.” He smiled coyly at you,

His voice was so calm while speaking you'd almost think he was unaffected by the situation but that was far from the truth, sitting on his lap gave away that he was extremely hard underneath you.

He kissed you again, gently this time as he pulled back and bore his eye into yours.

“Do you want to continue?” 

You didn't respond, only leaning in to kiss him before bringing your hands to the collar of his shirt and unbuttoning it.

“I'm not the only one that's going to be naked here.” 

He helped you take off his whole shirt, watching you as you admired his sculpted and scarred torso. While he helped you step out of your boxers.

“Turn around for me, love.”

You did as you were told, sitting in his lap with your back against his chest.

His hands suddenly came up on you again, going downwards to your cock as he gently wrapped a single hand around it while his other hand moved down to finger your asshole. “Wait! We need lube, let me go get it-” “Always two steps ahead of you, love.” Jing Yuan smiled at you pleasantly like he didnt have stark naked splayed out on his lap. “When did you-? Nevermind, I’m not going to ask.”

Your hands immediately found purchase on top of his much bigger ones, your breathing picking up again.

He inserted two fingers in you, pushing them in and out and curling them in just the right spot, hitting your already frayed nerves and stretching you open for him. Keeping the rhythm of his fingers up, slowly getting you towards the edge again when suddenly,

You were left empty as Jing Yuan retracted his hand and wiped it onto his pants as he unzipped them, before hooking both his hands under your plush thighs and lifting your asshole above his cock. “Tell me if you need a break.” Before you could respond, he was already impaling you on his cock, pushing you down slowly as you reached back with your hands and grabbed his neck while arching your back. “F-Fuck- too much-” “You can take it, I know you can.” He whispered breathlessly as he continued pushing you down until you met the base of his cock. “There we go.” Jing Yuan waited for you to adjust, his head directly hitting your prostate, watching intently as you fought to gain back your breath. You were struggling at this point, mind in a haze at the feeling of being so full. Not knowing where to place your hands you blurted our the first coherent thought that came to your mind.

“. . .Tie my hands, please.” Now it was the general’s turn to be surprised, you were not one to beg usually. He smiled coyly as he grabbed your discarded t-shirt and rolled it up to form a makeshift knot. “If i was aware we were going to do this tonight, I wouldve prepared more.” You pushed your hands out together in front of you impatiently, just wanting to move but not trusting your shaking legs to carry through. Jing Yuan kissed around your ears again started working on binding your hands immediately. Securing it as tight as he could, he tugged on it before pecking you on the cheek. “There. Is that better?” “Yes.” You were fully panting now, subtly grinding yourself on his cock. Jing yuan took it as his cue to move and hooked his hands under your thighs again before lifting you off his cock. The split second where you were left empty was enough for you to whine. He wasn’t a cruel lover, though, he thrusted back in, filling you instantly. He kept the tempo of fast but deep strokes and before long you could feel your second orgasm approaching. Suddenly, there was a change as he pushed you down onto the wooden floor face first and ass up, the angle making him reach in different areas. Your tied hands were above your head as you got rubbed on the floor like a mop cloth from his powerful thrusts. Jing Yuan bent over and draped his larger frame over your back, holding down your shaking hands with one of his own and thrusting faster. “Come on, come for me.” He whispered into your ear, again, reaching his other hand down to stroke your hard cock. And that's all it took for you to orgasm, releasing over your abdomen as he continued his thrusts. For a few seconds, you blanked out completely, caught up in the haze of your orgasm that you didn't even notice Jing Yuan continuing, That was until you were brought back to reality by a hit of overstimulation, tears already collecting at your lashes as the pleasure soared through your entire body. “Y-Yu-” “Just a little more.” He continued rubbing your dick and you could feel the tendrils of your third orgasm creeping up on you as you clenched around him hard. It pierced through you just as your boyfriend finally released inside you, hot liquid filling you up and you felt so full. Jing Yuan panted as he rested some of his body weight on you, essentially pinning you in place and having no way to move. Just the way you like it.

He grabbed your hips with both his hands as he gently thrusted a few times to get the last few seconds of pleasure in, wrecking your already overstimulated body..

“. . . I think my reward is incomplete.” He said after a few beats of silence.

“Absolutely not.”  Jing Yuan laughed breathlessly as he pulled you back onto his lap and rested himself against the sofa, wrapping his hands around your waist and putting his head on your shoulder.

The both of you relished in the afterglow for a bit with him still stuffed inside you, just enjoying and soaking each other’s presence, you were the first to speak.

“Horny bastard, you really piledrived me on the floor of our living room.” You laughed while pecking at his cheeks.

“Me? I’m the horny one now? You were the one that suggested this game in the first place!”

Jing Yuan feigned hurt as he tightend his hold on you, eyeing you cheekily as your ears turned red.

“I didn’t proposition sex! It was a game to-”

“To what? Play house with each other?” Jing Yuan asked in an amused tone before continuing,

“You wanted it to end like this, didn’t you?”

“Not on the goddamn floor! I’m gonna have bruises from this tomorrow, I hope youre happy.”

You pouted and held your (still bound) hands close to your chest, hearing Jing Yuan snicker and feeling his chest shake.

“I’ll give you a massage right now, on the bed this time, to make up for it”

“And then what? Escalate it into having sex again? I need to walk tomorrow, Yu.”

“You know me too well.”

You looked at him into his eyes at this and he gave you a crooked smile

“Untie my hands, we need to clean up and get to bed”

“Hmm… How about I let you go now and you let me enjoy my reward in the shower again?”

You sighed before nodding in acceptance, you weren’t going to feel your legs tomorrow.

This is the price you pay for provoking the sleeping lion.

“Horny bastard.”

[vohannesvotrov]

okay! as with anything related to lead, there's a lot to talk through here. this is not to say that these tests and results are not a concern, but rather to provide additional context for what the article is stating.

Let's begin with how these foods have been tested, and the basis for concern (caveat: am only knowledgeable in lead, not phthalates, cadmium, or sodium).

The Consumer Reports research utilizes California's Maximum Allowable Dose Level (MADL) for Lead and Lead Compounds, which is 0.5 mcg/day. The MADL for Lead is listed as a "Safe Harbor Level" as it comes to reproductive toxicity. The research which set the No Significant Risk Level (NSRL) focused on what quantity of lead would have to be consumed orally for there to be a risk of cancer in rats. The safe harbor levels have a function of determining whether the product requires a Proposition 65 warning (aka those stickers you see on products warning a consumer of potential reproductive and cancer risks). For other substances, there are available reports as to why that MADL has been adopted based on observable results in rat studies. That report is not available for lead, which may or may not be the result of the petition by the Center for Environmental Health to amend or repeal the MADL for lead (I genuinely can't tell if this is the case).

The MADL is being used for Consumer Reports research because as they've noted, there is no rigorous federal standard for "permissible" lead levels. But this doesn't hold much context for the common consumer -- it is somewhat unmoored from other measures of lead that we commonly see. For instance, the FDA recall on cinnamon products identified lead content in parts per million, which is a measurement based on volume rather than a potential health measure. Similarly, California has a law which identifies the naturally occurring level of lead in tamarind/chili-containing candy to be 0.2 ppm. The function of this measure is to deem that any greater amount of lead is the result of adulteration or contamination from the manufacturing process (as per 104 CA CONS HSC 110552).

To know what the equivalent measurement would be in parts per million would require knowing the volume of the substance. So then what does this Consumer Reports conclusion mean? It's hard to tell, because the report offers the lead content as a percent of that MADL, without indicating what the source of lead was within the Lunchable, or its relevant volume/mass/anything.

I am going to try and do the math and translate it to another measure, if possible (I will probably be wrong b/c I'm not spectacular with math so please feel free to check my work). Let's focus on the Turkey and Cheddar Crackers Lunchable with the highest percentage of 74% lead. That is 74% of 0.5 mcg/day, which would be 0.37 mcg/day. We're given a serving size of 3.2 ounces. 3.2 ounces is not a measurement of volume, but let's pretend for a moment that that 3.2 ounce measure is fluid ounces. Its volume would then be 0.000094635 m^3. If we divide 0.37 mcg/day by 0.000094635 m^3, we get a ppm measure of roughly 3.9 ppm. And also no, I have no idea what to do with the fact that this is meant to be a daily measure. So, not great. But at least that communicates something that may be more readily understood.

It's not a food recall yet -- that's an important note. I don't know if it ever will be, since the MADL doesn't require even Proposition 65 labelling, which is far more stringent than any federal guidelines we have.

It's hard to know anything with certainty right now. The reports are being cagey about their methods or conclusions, which does not serve consumers in understanding what the source of contamination might be, or how to avoid it. I'm not thrilled with this report and the way it communicates a concern without detailing methodology or significance of its results. It doesn't indicate to any degree what the extent the lead levels may be naturally occurring. It feels very separate from context, is my feeling. My coworkers, who have also worked in lead poisoning prevention for years, were also unsure on how to interpret these results.

So ultimately, I don't know anything with certainty. I can't offer any solace here, or truly indicate if there is a cause for concern. But I hope this at least grounds the results you see in more context.

sorry for being the town crier of food PSAs but I see a lot of breaking reports while I research for my job: as of April 9th, 2024 high levels of lead have been found in Lunchables kits, as well as other harmful contaminates

[sprintindia11]

The Role of Coworking Spaces in Supporting Local Startups

Innovation in a world that thrives on agility requires startups to survive on something much more than passion and a good idea. To develop, they need an ecosystem that is proactive in fostering growth. This is where coworking spaces come in, serving as more than places to work- ecosystems of resources, connections, and inspiration. In addition to the physical space, coworking places offer a person so many other assets-they offer high-speed internet access, a space for meetings, printing services, and lots more. Some even include mentorship programs, workshops, and business support services for general startups. With all these bases covered, coworking spaces let entrepreneurs spend their time and money on developing products, marketing, and customer acquisition rather than overhead costs. Read on to discover why coworking spaces are an essential catalyst for startup success.

An Innovation Ecosystem

Coworking spaces for startups form a basis for innovation. The well-balanced ecosystem provides freedom where the flow of ideas remains, and new perspectives prevail for different entrepreneurs, freelancers, and creative professionals. It is contrary to traditional office structures because coworking spaces tend to breed a culture of collaboration, thus creating an opportunity for startups to interact with each other and learn about different insights.

In this environment, entrepreneurship may challenge business ideas and call for more innovative solutions. Better networking options can be found in the environment of these types of spaces. For the startups, who may not have as many instant relations with people in a given industry that a large company might have access to, access to a more expansive professional network makes these spaces worthwhile. They offer fantastic opportunities for entrepreneurs to encounter like-minded partners, mentors, or even investors who want to finance their venture. Such an environment, providing this type of readymade community that shares excitement for the onset of novel ideas, makes coworking a space that is ideal for innovation and growth.

Cost-Efficiency and Resource Sharing

When starting a startup, the overhead costs of office space, furniture, utilities, and technology can quickly add up to a number that is very daunting. Coworking spaces for startups eliminate many of these overhead costs and represent an economical solution by providing access to shared resources and flexible membership plans. Unlike committing to any lease, whether it’s in the form of a daily pass up to a monthly membership, startups may choose an environment that gives them the latitude and agility needed to scale up or down appropriately so the workspace aligns with its current team size and what’s actually required for a project.

Aside from the physical space, flexible workspaces also offer a person many other assets, such as high-speed internet access, a space for meetings, printing services, and lots more. Some even include mentorship programs, workshops, and business support services specific to general startups. With all these bases covered, flexible workspaces allow entrepreneurs to spend their time and money on developing products, marketing, and customer acquisition rather than on overhead costs.

Flexibility in Workspace Options

One of the most significant benefits of coworking spaces for startups is the variety of flexible workspaces available. Compared to traditional office environments that require businesses to sign multi-year leases, coworking spaces offer short-term options that are ideal for startups that may need clarification on their long-term space requirements. This adaptability allows startups to pay only for what they need while having the option to expand as they grow.

There is also the added benefit of having a choice between quiet, focused areas as well as collaborative open space. This is very attractive to startups since different teams within a company may need other kinds of environments. For instance, a product development team could insist on a quieter space where they can think quietly, while a marketing team would need more dynamic collaboration. Such facilities are therefore available in flexible workspaces, where startup companies can choose what they want for themselves with freedom from the constraints that generally accompany traditionally provided office accommodation space.

Accessibility to Talent and Collaborative Opportunities

Another particular advantage that coworking spaces provide to start-ups is access to a rich talent pool. Startups inevitably run with lean teams, and coworking spaces are where freelancers, consultants, and other professionals who are readily available to fill in particular kinds of skills can be found. It might be a kind of difference that life for startups requires marketing or design or legal assistance but have to prepare for full-time employment of staff.

Apart from utilizing the talent of the individuals, it allows the startups to interact with each other. Shared environments present an opportunity to discuss various issues, hence possibilities for collaboration. For example, two startups operating within the same coworking environment might find an opportunity to integrate their technologies or combine efforts in aspects of resources towards joint marketing. Such an interaction helps coworking environments develop collaborations that improve the growth of startups while allowing new opportunities open for the starters.

Inspiring work environments and culture

Coworking spaces for startups are designed in a manner that is supposed to create a vibrant and motivating work environment. Many coworking spaces for startups are purposefully developed, giving a perfect blend of comfort and creativity. Bright colors, natural light, and private and communal spaces will all amount to an inspiring atmosphere that inspires productivity and creativity. Start-ups require spaces that are as innovative as they are, and coworking spaces meet the demand for creating visually and functionally appealing spaces.

Furthermore, coworking cultures are supportive and energizing. Where else do you find people being surrounded by a competitive atmosphere full of hope in the corporate world? Coworking spaces bring forth a sense of community that fosters every business to support one another to thrive. Many coworking spaces facilitate events, workshops, and social gatherings that bring people together and open up professional boundaries. For startups, this community spirit can be an added motivator to encourage them by being there for each other on the bumpy ride called entrepreneurship.

Empowerment Through Technology and Modern Infrastructure

Startups mainly depend on technology in order to innovate, manage teams, and reach customers. So, coworking spaces that specifically target startups ensure that the underlying technology has the potential to enhance productivity. From high-speed Wi-Fi to video conferencing facilities, software tools useful for project management, and many such facilities, coworking space provides the right kind of infrastructure that helps startups work accordingly.

Access to advanced technology then would be the characteristic most important for tech-focused startups. Some coworking spaces have literally provided facilities that are specialized for requirements modern businesses might need: such as 3D printers, soundproof phone booths, and media rooms. These resources help enable coworking spaces for start-ups to let entrepreneurs use tools meant to be the latest innovations, thereby keeping up with the fast-paced market.

Conclusion: A Launchpad for Growth

Coworking spaces, once thought to be an office solution or something where startups could split up offices to cut costs, have blossomed into more. They are places constructed from the foundation of ideas and connections and networking, where resources can help facilitate startups thriving and growing. Flexibility in options over workspaces plus access to a community of professionals is the perfect recipe for innovation and growth.

Coworking spaces are significant to local startups. Essentially, they act as launchpads that help entrepreneurs transform their dreams into reality by fulfilling their needs in the early stages of such initiatives. As a startup ecosystem continues flourishing, coworking spaces provide crucial mileage for such ventures to establish themselves and grow eventually, marking their presence within the business landscape.

[govindhtech]

What Is Auto Scaling? And Advantages Of Auto Scaling

What is Auto Scaling?

A cloud computing approach called autoscaling automatically modifies a server farm’s resource allocation according to the load it is experiencing. Another name for it is automated scaling.

Auto scaling, also known as autoscaling, auto-scaling, and occasionally automatic scaling, is a method for dynamically assigning computational resources in cloud computing. The number of servers that are active will usually change automatically as user needs change, depending on the demand to a server farm or pool.

Because load balancing providing capacity is usually the basis for an application’s scalability, auto scaling and load balancing are related. In other words, the auto scaling policy is influenced by a number of factors, including the load balancer’s serving capacity, cloud monitoring metrics, and CPU utilization.

Advantages of Auto scaling in cloud computing

Companies can scale cloud services like virtual machines or server capacity up or down based on traffic or consumption levels using cloud computing technologies like autoscaling. Google Cloud Platform (GCP), Microsoft Azure, and Amazon Web Services offer autoscaling.

Additionally, core autoscaling features enable dependable, low-cost performance by smoothly adding and reducing new instances in response to fluctuations in demand. Therefore, even though the demand for applications is dynamic and even unpredictable, autoscaling offers consistency.

The main advantage of autoscaling is that it automatically adjusts the number of servers that are active, removing the need to react manually in real-time to traffic surges that call for additional resources and instances. These servers must be configured, monitored, and decommissioned for autoscaling.

DDoS attacks might make it hard to spot this kind of rise. A system may occasionally be able to react to this problem more rapidly with improved autoscaling settings and more effective monitoring of autoscaling data. The same is true for auto-scaling databases, which dynamically adjust capacity, start up, and stop depending on the demands of an application.

Important Terms for Auto Scaling

Autoscaling group

An instance is a single server or computer that is governed by auto-scaling rules designed for a collection of computers. The group is auto-scaling, and the auto-scaling policies apply to every instance within the group.

The AWS ecosystem’s compute platform, for instance, is called Elastic Compute Cloud (EC2). Scalable and adaptable server solutions are provided by EC2 instances in the AWS cloud. For the end user, Amazon EC2 instances are seamless, elastically scaled on demand, and virtual.

For the purpose of automatic scaling, a logical group of Amazon EC2 instances is called an auto scaling group. The same auto scaling rules will apply to all of the group’s Amazon EC2 instances.

The quantity of instances within the auto scaling group is referred to as its size. In that auto scaling group, the desired capacity or size is the optimal number of instances. The auto scaling group can either instantiate (provision and attach) new instances or delete (detach and terminate) instances if those two numbers differ.

A certain auto scaling group’s minimum and maximum size threshold values establish cutoff points above and below which instance capacity shouldn’t increase or decrease, depending on the rules and auto scaling algorithms in place. Any modifications to the auto scaling group’s intended capacity in reaction to metrics exceeding predetermined criteria are frequently outlined in an auto scaling policy.

In order to guarantee that the system as a whole can continue to handle traffic, auto scaling strategies frequently include cooldown periods. Auto scaling cooldown periods provide newly instantiated instances more time to start managing traffic after certain scaling activities.

Modifications to the intended capacity of an auto scaling group may be fixed or gradual. Just a required capacity value is provided by fixed alterations. Rather than specifying an end value, incremental modifications cause a certain amount to decline or rise. Policies that increase desired capacity are referred to as scaling up or scaling out policies. Desired capacity is reduced when policies are scaled down, also known as scaled in.

A health check is performed by an auto scaling group to see if attached instances are operating correctly. It is necessary to flag unhealthy occurrences for replacement.

Health checks can be carried out via elastic load balancing software. Additionally available are custom health checks and Amazon EC2 status checks. A successful health check can be determined by whether the instance is still reachable and operational, or by whether it is still registered and operational with its related load balancer.

Launch setup explains the parameters and scripts required to start a new instance. This comprises the machine image, instance type, possible launch availability zones, purchasing options (such on-demand vs. spot), and scripts to execute at launch.

Advantages of Auto Scaling

Autoscaling offers a number of benefits.

The price: Businesses that depend on cloud infrastructure as well as those who manage their own infrastructure can put some servers to sleep when loads are light with auto scaling. This lowers the cost of water and electricity when cooling is done with water. Moreover, cloud auto scaling entails paying for overall utilization rather than maximum capacity.

Safety: While maintaining application availability and resilience, auto scaling also guards against hardware, network, and application failures by identifying and replacing problematic instances.

Accessibility: Autoscaling increases uptime and availability, particularly in situations when production workloads are unpredictable.

Autoscaling lowers the possibility of having too many or too few servers for the actual traffic load, which is distinct from the daily, monthly, or annual cycle that many firms use to control server use. This is due to auto scaling’s ability to adapt to real usage patterns, unlike static scaling.

A static scaling approach, for instance, might send certain servers to sleep at 2:00 am based on the notion that traffic is normally lower at that time. But in reality, there can be increases at that moment possibly during a news event that becomes viral or at other unforeseen moments.

Read more on Govindhtech.com