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danses-with-dogmeat · 3 years ago

Note

Ooooo you're doing yandere alphabet stuff!!! If you dont mind, may I add on to that anon's request? When you get to FO4 can you include Glory, Dima, and platonic Father? And when you get to FNV, Ulysses, Graham, Benny, and Yesman?? Thank you! I really liked the FO3 post!

Yandere Headcannons Part 3: Fallout 4 Companions + Extras

So here is the third and final installment to this little series! I hope y'all enjoyed it, and if you want me to add anyone else, of course just lmk :)

Included Below: Cait, Curie, Danse, Deacon, Father, DiMA, Glory, Hancock, Kellogg, MacCready, Nick, Piper, Preston, & X6-88

(Also, sorry if DiMA is completely out of character, I've never met him in-game, and I didn't have time to do as much research as I normally would, but hopefully it's not too obvious 😅)

Here is Part 1 (FO3 Companions)

Here is Part 2 (FONV Companions + Extras)

I hope you enjoy!

Also, just a TW for typical yandere behavior: unhealthy relationships, guilt trips, manipulation, lack of consent, control, allusions to suicide, blood, threats, and mentions of murder ahead!

Cait:

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

She’d only mock them if they were being a baby about it. Sole thinks this is bad? Try being enslaved by raiders, why doncha. She has no sympathy for them at all; whatever it is she’s putting them through, there ain’t no way it’s close to the kinda suffering she went through at the hands of the animals who bought her when she was younger. She doesn’t beat them, even if they deserve it, doesn’t do anythin’ without their consent (though she might complain about it), and they got food, water and shelter under her care. As far as Cait’s concerned, Sole can either shut the fuck up, or thank her for keepin’ them bloody safe.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

She’s sort of a “tough love” type gal. Lots of punches to the shoulder, or bumping into them affectionately in public, and some more genuine forms of physical touch in private, like playing with their hair, or hot n’ heavy makeout seshes on the sofa, maybe even massages if they’re feelin’ up to it, but she does require consent first. Especially when it comes to sex. She still likes to be intimate with her partner, and thinks it’s a good release for both of them, and she might grumble about them refusing her and say they’re being ridiculous, but Cait wouldn’t do anything, especially anything sexual, against their will. She knows what that shit is like, and wouldn’t catch herself becoming like the monsters who owned her, under any circumstance.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Cait doesn’t tend to look too far ahead. Every time she tries to make a plan, it ends up getting fucked over anyway, so she just tends to go with it, whatever “it” might be. One thing she does know though, she likes Sole. They treated her right, even from the start. No one had ever done that with her before. Even the few people she could say she cared about didn’t ever treat her right. Maybe that’s why she’s done this… Why she needs Sole all to herself. The people she’s cared about… She’s lost all of them, one way or another. That shite’s not gonna happen again, that’s the only thing the lass is certain of.

T) Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

She wishes she could just clench her jaw and give ‘em a rap over the head to shut ‘em up. Wishes she could be removed from it, uncaring and unaffected, but the truth is, it makes her chest ache. Cait tends to lash out, to raise her voice and tell them to suck it up, if only so she doesn’t have to hear their wailing anymore, so she doesn’t have to see their tears. An’ it’s not ‘cause it annoys her, though that may be how it comes off, but it really hurts her when she thinks they might not want to be with her the way she needs to be with them. Cait may be rough with them when they sniffle and whine, but once they’ve calmed down she always tries to comfort them afterwards, in her own way, at least. She’ll drape an arm around their shoulders, wipe their tears away with a calloused finger, maybe even give their forehead a tender kiss, followed by a whispered apology and a period of silence where she just clings to them and tries to make them understand where she’s coming from. It’s not that Cait doesn’t know why they’re sad, she does. She gets it, she just wishes it wasn’t because of her. Yet still, she can’t seem to let them go.

Curie:

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Though Curie is clingy and a bit controlling, she doesn’t have a cruel bone in her body. She wouldn’t mock Sole for being upset, and would become upset herself at their negative reaction to being by her side. If she's not cruel, and if she loves them, why wouldn't they want to be with her? Honestly, she just wants to understand what she's doing wrong, and try to be the most ideal companion to her love that she can be.

U) Unique. Would they do anything different from classic yandere?

She’s so much kinder to her beloved than most. She doesn’t understand that what she is doing is wrong. This was how she was always shown affection when it came to being in the vault; the doctors were never unkind to her, necessarily, and she couldn’t possibly be horrible to her companion, it’s just all she knows. It's not imprisonment to her, it's just... living, and though the doctors and her were underground for so long, imprisoned in their own way, it was the time in her life when people were kindest to her, when she had purpose, when she could care for others and know their care in return. It's really all the synth knows.

She wouldn’t try to be manipulative, and she is alright with Sole spending time with others, so long as they always come back to her in the end. She is vastly more loving and considerate than traditional yandere characters, but she does maintain a level of control over her partner, an infatuation and a dependence on them that isn’t present in healthy relationships.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She doesn’t see that what she’s doing is wrong; therefore, it’s difficult for her to regret any of it. Curie is kind to her love, she’s supportive, and she never leaves their side; how could they be unhappy? If they make their discomfort known to her, she has a hard time understanding it, but she will express apology, and perhaps make it seem as though she regrets her controlling actions, but she’s not sure how honest she’s being when communicating her regret. She’s more just stating what she thinks Sole wants to hear, but again, she doesn’t see her actions as anything worth regretting.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Curie tends to have a pre-war, idealized version of the future she would like for her and Sole. Though now she knows that it’s unlikely, or perhaps even impossible, for the pair to have such a life in the current world they live in, Curie is determined to come as close as she can. She feels that her partner deserves some peace after everything they’ve been through, and she wouldn’t mind some for herself either. However, this would be a distant future plan. For now, the synth is content traveling the Commonwealth with her beloved partner at her side, so that she can observe and learn as much as possible.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

She loves speaking with her love about anything and everything, especially if they want to tell her about their difficulties, and their past. Curie tends not to think of her past as being something worth saying much about, though. She stayed in one room for 200 years, most of which she spent in solitude (apart from the mole rats), and what she does recall from her past that involves others only makes her sad. She’d rather hear about Sole’s life, rather than chitter on about her uneventful one, and she’d much rather help with their problems than have to speak at length about her old friends who shared the vault with her all those years ago. However, she’s more than happy to tell Sole often and how much she cares about them.

Danse:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

For the most part, no. Danse believes in respect above all else, and if he expects it from his partner, he'll be damned if he doesn't treat them with it in return. He's emotional, vulnerable and desperate after finding out the truth about himself, but he won't let it cloud his judgement enough to disregard his core values. He just wants Sole near to him. Wherever they want to go, whatever they want to do, as long as it's ethical and in accordance with the ideals he upholds, Danse will be satisfied, just as long as they're by his side.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

If Sole isn't comfortable, he won't show his affection for them. It's as simple as that, though, it will always be there. Mostly, Danse gives verbal praise and shows them he cares by tending to their needs. It's more difficult for him to be physically affectionate if he has to initiate, and he won't do so at all if Sole is uncertain about it, but in time, he finds that he likes to spend private moments with his partner wrapped in his arms. Feeling them physically there beside him, being able to touch them and know they're there, it's what he needs more than anything. His time in the Brotherhood left little room for showing affection, especially of the physical sort, and his fears of being utterly alone coupled with the fact that he's been touch starved for the majority of his life have left Danse nervous in the face of intentional physical affection, but nonetheless, in utter need of it. If only in order to feel as though he isn't the cold, hard, synthetic monster he thinks of himself as.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He's a soldier, through and through. As such, Danse's punishments would be of a similar sort of consequence as they would have been in the Brotherhood. Physical punishment in the form of exercises, chores and cleaning in purposefully inefficient ways, even writing lines are all disciplinary tactics he would use to his advantage. Danse likes to think that he tries to separate his more Commanding Officer-esque personality traits, from his personal, romantic life, but when it comes to punishment, this is all the ex-Paladin knows.

S) Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

His earth shattering identity crises threw his entire perception of reality off kilter. Danse has never witnessed particularly shining examples of proper healthy relationships, which doesn't help in this case, but more so than that, is his utter desperation to not be alone. The stinging betrayal of the closest thing he's ever had to family is still running rampant through his mind and causing an insatiable ache in his synthetic heart. He can't imagine how anyone could possibly pay him any mind after finding out the truth of his identity, but now that Sole has? How the hell could he possibly ever let them go? They're literally all that he has left, and he's clinging to them as desperately as he can without damaging them.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Danse tends to be matter-of-fact about his vulnerability. He's open with his words and trying to make sense of his own feelings, but he rarely lets himself be vulnerable in a more emotional sense. He'll do his level best at refraining from crying in their presence, and tries not to let his anger or frustration or guilt be expressed in a physical way, and even something as simple as laughter is scarce at the best of times. But his ability with words, and the way he's forced himself to engage in heart to heart conversations over the years, they pay off in the sense that his partner often knows what Danse is thinking, or feeling, but they really do have to take his word for it, because that's likely all they're going to get, unless they initiate their own physical contact.

Deacon:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Deacon’s “abduction” of Sole is more of a manipulation of their mind than it is a physical imprisonment. He uses his wit and verbal skillset to convince Sole to only trust him, to only depend on him and the causes that he supports. It’s all in their best interest, he tells himself, even as he methodically cuts each of their friends out of their life and takes up more and more of their time until he’s the only one left in their life that they can rely on.

This whole process is against their will, but Deacon cuts everyone out at such a steady rate, takes away their freedoms over a considerable amount of time, and refuses to do anything physical without their consent; he’s so periodic and careful that Sole hardly notices their freedoms being repressed until it’s already done, until even they feel like what Deacon is doing is for the best.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He’s extremely closed off at first, and even when it does seem like he’s finally opening up to them, he proves himself a liar all over again, at every chance. It’s only after Sole is his, when he has them safely at his side, when there’s nothing left that they could hide from him, that he decides to slowly reveal pieces of his past. It’s difficult, even impossible sometimes, to tell if he’s lying or not, but he knows. It’s no easy thing for him, and it’s rare at best, but slowly, methodically, the spy unravels his story for his beloved, if only so they can understand his actions now, where he’s come from, what he’s gone through, and why he chose them to share his true self with.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He has a hard enough time with affection when his partner is enthusiastic about it, so if Sole refuses him in any way, he’s not even going to consider forcing them. But if they seem into it, and after a good amount of time spent with them, Deacon will become comfortable enough to initiate small forms of physical affection. Mostly it starts off being contact of a silly sort: nose boops, finger holding (as opposed to whole hand-holding), random tickles, head pats, noogies, and the like.

Before anything physical occurs, Deacon will be verbally affectionate by sharing jokes, words of advice, little compliments and such, as a sort of temporary replacement/start to affection of a more physical nature.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

He throws a few jokes Sole’s way, but they usually have little to do with his manipulation and are just generally used to make them feel inadequate enough that they feel they have to depend on him for their own well-being. Beyond that, Deacon isn’t cruel physically, and his mocking is always humorous enough that they may not realize how much it wears on their self esteem until he’s already got them convinced they can’t survive without him.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

This was touched on a bit earlier (See: D), but mostly he just separates them from all other sources of possible emotional support, all friends they’ve made, or what’s left of their family, and he forces them to depend on him for everything they may need in a companion, in a protector, in a friend or a partner. He’s all of it, and because he is, they can’t leave him.

Beyond that, he just ensures that they are passionate about the Railroad’s cause so they both can continue to do their jobs for the faction as a functioning team.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

Usually he just has a discussion with them. Deacon’s violent tendencies died out after everything with the UP Deathclaws came to a horrific close, and he likes to think of himself as being on the chill side of the majority of wasteland residents. Physical punishments aren’t an option for him, no sir, so he’ll just go about convincing them that what they did was foolish, and that all they need to do is trust him if they want to be happy, and if they want to survive out here.

He'll talk them through their mistakes, make it known to his partner how foolish they were, he'll belittle and gaslight enough to the point that they feel as bad about their misbehaving as Deacon does, and they won't do it again.

DiMA:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

DiMA doesn’t want more from them than just companionship. Someone to share his time with. He’s had that with Nick before, but now… He can’t explain it, but Sole makes him feel whole, like he hasn’t in decades, and just having them near to him is enough. So, he’ll keep them with him in Acadia, and they can learn to be happy here, like so many others, with him at their side. That’s all he wants from them, all he needs is just them, here, at his side. Nothing more. Shouldn't be too hard then, right?

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

He’s always had an ideal future in mind. One where synths are safe, where they can live in peace, unbothered, and untouched; he wants the same future for his Sole. He wants them here with him, always. He wants them to feel safe, to be happy, to care for him in a way no one really has before. DiMA doesn’t know much of love, he’ll admit. It’s always been more of a concept than a feeling to him, but with Sole, he’d like to imagine he could one day know what it feels like to love, and be loved in return.

M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

He tries to be honest about himself, even to newcomers, it’s how he’s established trust with his allies, how he’s been the leader of Acadia with so much success over so many years, and so he is as honest with Sole as he can be. When they brought Nick to him, he could not have been more grateful, and for that, they deserve his genuinity.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

DiMA tells Sole his stories, regales the tales of acquiring Arcadia, of befriending the co-founders, of being in the Institute with Nick, of escaping, of trying to balance the well-being of his own people with the peace of those around him. He also gives praise, often telling Sole how much they mean to him, how grateful he is for their assistance, for bringing his brother back to him, for being there for him. A hand on the shoulder, a pat on the back, pressing his forehead to theirs are all ways that he shows them he cares for them. Perhaps too, if they are willing, if they’d like to try more traditional forms of affection, he knows his body is strange, after all of the alterations, the attachments, but if Sole takes the initiative in response to his kindness towards them, if they should hug him, or perhaps even give him a kiss, DiMA won’t exactly know how to react, but he’ll be grateful. He’s never really felt human before, and he hasn’t had to. He’s a synth, and proud of it, he doesn’t have any delusions about being like Sole is, but he doesn’t feel like he has to, especially if they treat him in such a way. It’s comforting to him, to be seen as human, even if he knows he’s not.

Father (Platonic):

F) Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It would just make the older man less sympathetic. He sees their reluctance as immature, and the more dramatic they are with their resistance, the less stock he takes in their reactions to his behavior. He thinks of them as being dramatic.

After all, Shaun was forcibly taken at a young age, and raised in the comfort of the Institute. He knows what it's like, and he knows that, if anything, he’s doing his parent a favor. If they don’t recognize that, he doesn’t know how to help them. The Institute is far superior to the surface world, they're safe here, they can build a new life, they can be happy, as he's been all this time. Why are they overreacting this way? It's not like there's anyone left on the surface that they care for, everyone they know, besides him, is long gone. They should be relieved to have him in their life, to start anew in a place where they can remain happy and healthy for years to come.

He’ll try to give them explanations to help them make sense of his actions, if they aren’t too hysterical, and he does want Sole in his life, so he won’t be completely emotionless, but Shaun would much prefer to have a conversation with them rather than try and calm their frantic actions.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Shaun doesn’t show affection in the way most do, but he does want to communicate his desire to rekindle some sort of relationship with his parent. Mostly, Shaun’s forms of affection are shown through actions rather than physical touch, or even words. He’ll ensure his parent is comfortable where they are staying, that they are provided for, and that they feel valued in the society that he is in charge of. However, he does occasionally try to tell his parent their value to him personally, but he’s admittedly not great at it. Physical expressions of affection may be uncomfortably returned, but Shaun wouldn’t initiate.

T) Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

This is similar to the fighting point. If they are hysterical, Shaun’s sympathy level will be low at best, but he does have a bit more of an emotional reaction if Sole’s own behavior is subdued and despondent. Of course he doesn’t enjoy seeing his parent cry, but he has a hard time understanding their despair. If they’re reserved about it, he will sit and try to talk them through what’s bothering them, or point them in Dr. Volkert's direction for professional help. Shaun does often have a difficult time empathizing with Sole, given the differences in perspective, upbringing, and circumstance, but for them, he really does try.

H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Sole may never get the chance to return to the surface again. Beyond that, Shaun isn’t particularly cruel, and Sole is well cared for within the Institute, but their freedom is remarkably oppressed.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Shaun doesn’t tend to be open with his feelings, it’s simply not the way things are in the Institute, but for his parent? He’s more open than with most. Sole doesn’t know Shaun, not as the director, not as a person, and sadly, not even as their son; which is actually liberating for him. With Sole, he can voice certain ideas, concerns, or dreams of his that might otherwise be controversial, or things that he never got to act on, based on his role in the Institute. He enjoys speaking with them, but rarely does the conversation become heartfelt in the way Sole might want.

While Sole might be searching for an apology from their son, some sign that he wishes his upbringing might be different, that he wants to work towards a loving relationship with his parent with the limited time they have left, he rarely obliges these wishes. Mostly, he dismisses the idea, stating that it is all in the past, that there’s nothing that can be done to change it, and though he may seek to have some type of relationship with Sole before his illness claims him, he’s not as sentimental about the idea. He sees their relationship as a practicality now. What they could have had is something based on thin air and futile wishes of being able to go back and change the way things are now by altering the past, but Shaun knows that can never happen, and he knows that Sole is aware of that fact as well. He’ll express that if things were different, he may still have been happy, but for now, there’s nothing either of them can do to alter their positions.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

He doesn’t see his actions as anything worth regretting. His parent should be thanking him for allowing them into this faction, for protecting them from the harsh brutishness of the outside world, he shouldn’t have to apologize for going out of his way to help them… Though, perhaps the way he went about it could have been more mindful when it came to his parent’s comfort level.

Later, but before his death, Shaun will think back on how little he had revealed to them early on, how he wasn’t exactly dishonest, but he certainly wasn’t transparent, and though he won’t regret what he did, he may apologize to Sole for the strife he may have unintentionally caused.

Glory:

G) Game. Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling escape?

It’s not a game, it's a goddamn mission. If Sole leaves her side, Glory assumes they’re in trouble. It’s the kinda mindset you have when you’re a part of the Railroad, and especially if you’re an escaped synth. If she wakes up and they’re gone, she’s going on a fucking hunt for them, and when she finds them, she’s not letting them out of her sight for a solid week, and she’s sure to let them know how much they worried her when they were gone. The Railroad heavy will threaten and guilt trip Sole until they never leave her side again, and she’ll be serious as hell, all throughout.

L) Love Letters. How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

It starts off with a lot of talk. Whenever Sole comes to HQ, the heavy seems to be waiting for them, ready to strike up a conversation, to talk about their last mission, and hers, to brag about her accomplishments, and tell Sole how badass they are, even compared to her. Heart to hearts occur pretty often as well, wherein she tells Sole how grateful she is for having them in the faction, tells them what a difference they’ve made, and how they’ve certainly taken some of the load off of her shoulders.

After the talking comes the companionship. She offers to go on missions with them, even when they can tell that it’s behind Desdemona’s back, or against the Railroad leader's wishes. When they are out on missions together, Glory likes to show off her skills as a heavy, and compliments Sole on their own accomplishments out in the field. The praise leads to a bit of flirting that tends to come off as a joke, just some teasing from one agent to the next, but they become more serious the more that Sole responds to them.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

She takes away bits of their free will slowly, almost methodically, and she doesn’t even notice she’s doing it until it gets out of hand. Glory starts by ensuring she goes with Sole on every mission, she keeps them from having other companions, or working with other agents, and slowly but surely takes up more and more of their time until they can say that Glory is really their only friend.

She wouldn’t ever keep them from helping the Railroad, the faction and its ideals are just too important to her, but all of their missions go through her, and are completed with her assistance. That’s non-negotiable.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She wouldn’t really see it as abducting, per say. Glory does allow them a good bit of freedom, just so long as she’s involved, and so, it’s unlikely she’d ever regret it.

If Sole really gave her a piece of their mind, if they stood up to her and let Glory know how much she was hurting them, how much she was stifling their freedoms, she might feel bad for a bit, especially considering her background, and her own familiarity with repressed freedoms, but once she spends some time considering their words, she really has a hard time seeing fault in her own actions. She cares about Sole, so of course she always spends time with them. Glory can protect her partner like no one else can, they share so many of the same views and goals, they have the same goddamn job, where else is she supposed to go? How else is she supposed to treat her partner? They need to get their priorities in order, cuz Glory knows where she stands.

Y) Yearn. How long do they pine for their darling before they snap?

Glory takes an interest in the vault dweller from the start, but it’s not until they’ve completed a few missions that she can’t keep them off her mind. The big one was their first mission together. After that, after Sole's badassery and the witty banter they exchanged, she felt inseparable from them. The pair worked so well together, how could she not want to spend every damn mission with them? They fuckin’ killed it together. After that, there was no way she was letting them go out without her, she was stuck on ‘em for good.

Hancock:

H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Hancock has a tendency to be a little unpredictable at times, and his possessiveness of Sole would only make his actions more rash. He doesn’t like to take away their freedoms, doesn’t like to take advantage of them; it goes against everything the ghoul stands for. But, he will do what he must to keep them beside him. He’s not cruel to them, he loves his Sole with everything inside of him, but… If anyone should stand between him and them, even if their own actions seek to tear them from him, he won’t tolerate it. He’s patient enough with them, but everyone has a breaking point.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He’s almost unaware of the amount of affection, (physical, verbal, or otherwise) he seems to shower his partner in. It’s just so natural for the ghoul to show his appreciation for them in that way, and though he’s conscious to Sole’s own limits, if Hancock had his way, he’d have his hands on them at all times. Long hugs, wandering hands, deep kisses and just staring in admiration are all almost constant when the ghoul is at his partner’s side. And now that he finally has his way, he always will be.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

Mostly it’s just words of warning for him, especially at first, but as he and Sole spend more time together, he will take away some of their rights as well, if he sees fit. Contact with others is already limited, but anything that Sole usually dabbles in will be cut off for a time, be it alcohol, chems, or free time out in the open. Really though? Most of them are empty threats. Hancock is no softie, he’s killed men for looking at him the wrong way if he felt they deserved it, but for Sole? Well, for them there’s an exception.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Nah, he has no interest in making them more miserable. Just Sole being there with him is enough. Hancock knows he’s not really much of a catch, despite what he tries to present himself as, so he considers that sacrifice enough from Sole. He’ll separate them from others, maybe take away a few of their freedoms if he’s really upset with them, but really, he just wants them, and he loves them more than anything. How could he ever be cruel to the one he cares for so much?

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

As mentioned in H and C, Hancock really doesn’t like to fuck with Sole’s freedoms, it just doesn’t sit right with him, with all that he stands for, all that he preaches. But if it’s absolutely necessary, he’ll take some away as a form of punishment. Really though, the ghoul is content if Sole stays by his side, if they remain his and his alone, that’s all he cares about. He’s never felt this way about anyone before, and certainly never found anyone as good as Sole that wanted him in return, and he’s not risking what they have for anything, even if it means he has to go against his core principles once in a while to keep it that way.

C) -- Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Hancock may be a ghoul, but he’s no monster. He’s not going to force anything on the one he loves. He’s convinced they feel some affection for him, but until they give the word that it’s okay, he won’t go beyond their boundaries physically. He may push some chems their way, or suggest having a drink or two, and he may separate them from anyone else that he knows can’t care for them the way he does, just to make them feel closer to him, feel less inhibitions, but he doesn’t force anything on them.

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Oh, anyone who can see the pair, even from a distance, knows that this ghoul is absolutely head over heels for Sole. If his lips aren’t on them, then his arms are around them. If his arms aren’t around them, then his hands are on them. If his hands aren’t on them, then he can’t tear his ogling gaze from them. He smiles for them, laughs for them, orders their food and drinks, and makes sure they’re always comfortable and safe. Even if Hancock does have to sacrifice his own ideals a bit, if he has to take away some of his partner’s free will, he still ensures that with him, they are well-cared for, that everyone (especially Sole) knows how much he loves them, and how he’d never let anything happen to them, so help him.

Kellogg:

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Kellogg changes quite a bit with time. At first, it’s all about possession. He’s aggressive with his partner, he keeps a wary eye on them, grasps their arm tightly in his grip as they walk, stands much too close for comfort. When they’re intimate, he’s rough with the way he takes them, marking and bruising as he conquers their body with his.

Later though, as he allows himself to become more disillusioned, he tries to act more like a proper partner, like he was with Sarah… Despite the fact that Sole is only there by force. He knows they despise him, deep down, he’ll always know that, but… Maybe the two of them don’t have to act that way. Maybe Conrad can get some small semblance of that life he knew he never deserved, but that he was so close to having all those years ago. With Sole, maybe he can play family again. Isn’t that something they would want as well? After all they lost?

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

At first? Not at all. Most days, Kellogg wishes he could forget his own past, Sole has no need to hear that sob story. No, he’s very reserved in the early stages.

When they've 'been together' for awhile, he may start to open up though. Particularly on the softer nights, when they’ve both had a few drinks (Sole more so than him, he’s still worried about them trying to leave him if he lets his guard down), laying beside each other in the afterglow of a union not quite as rough as they used to be, he may let slip something sentimental or sweet about his family from before. While they’re walking around the Commonwealth, he may mumble about some memory of growing up on the west coast, and eventually Sole will have enough information to get a clear picture of his life, but it definitely comes in bits and pieces that they'll need to sort out.

L) Love Letters. How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Sole did all the work for him, really. Came right into his clutches, as willingly as one can. Though, maybe they didn’t expect that he’d take such a liking to them. Nor did he, though.

Sole had always intrigued him, from the moment he saw them in their freezer. When he first started thinking about them, it just never stopped. Even when Sole chased him down, when they were spitting and cursing and their face was bunched up into a defiant snarl, that only made him more interested. He couldn’t believe the fight this pre-war suburban family-type had in them. After that meeting, there was no courting, no following them, no second-guessing himself. It ended there.

It was easy, holding their kid over their head like that, holding the information of where the Institute was and how to get there from them, their desperate eyes promising they’d do anything for the knowledge he had. Yes, it was easy after that, and so long as they knew that he had access to their son, that he could reach Shaun and they couldn’t, so long as they knew Kellogg was mad enough not to make idle threats about the safety of their child, Sole simply had to stay by his side. Or else.

L) – (M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Kellogg really is a simple man at heart. He is who he is, as unpleasant as that man may be. If anything, he can sometimes be softer with Sole than he is on the surface, but only when they are bending to his will, allowing him to remain beside them with just the right amount of fight in their actions, submitting, but with their teeth clenched and a glint in their eye, that’s when he chooses to show that softer side. That man that he wasn't, but that he once thought he had the capability to become. Conrad always knew he was a tough fucker, a mercenary, a killer, but when he’d had his family, the people he didn’t deserve, he became disillusioned, thinking his life could be anything but what it is now. Though… with Sole, maybe he can try to pretend once more. If only for a little while.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Most everything. What the hell do they have left to lose, anyway? Everyone they love is gone, everywhere they could go has changed, the world isn’t safe, it isn’t theirs anymore. No, now it’s his. And so are they. Sole has no need for anyone else. Why would they? He can protect them, care for them, keep them in line and off the cruel streets. Hell, maybe one day he’ll even take them to the Institute... Maybe.

For now though, they stick by his side, they remain with him and have minimal contact with anyone else. They show too much friendliness to some stranger, and Kellogg’s liable to end that conversation in a most gruesome way. What the hell else could they need? Who else could they need? Nah, they’re sticking by him, doing as he says and as he wants until the day their escape is successful, and if it isn’t? Well then, ‘till the day he dies or gets tired of them, whichever comes first.

G) Game. Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling escape?

He’d like his partner having a bit of fight in them. It’s thrilling in a way, but it’s also… cute, endearing. They really think they have the capability of escaping from him? Really? Fine, let them try, let them realize the hard way that that isn’t the case. Kellogg would like to play their game for a time, mess with their mind, let them think they've gotten away for good this time, and then, at the last second, he’d foil their plans and make it clear that he’s known their intentions as long as they had them in that pretty little head of theirs. Kellogg can be cruel, especially at the beginning. As he grows more attached to his partner though, over time, it becomes less entertaining, less endearing to him, and he’ll put a stop to it, even if he has to take drastic measures.

G) – H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Well, the day they met wasn’t great… Though, there have been some certainly rough days since. Kellogg is a ruthless mercenary, he’s violent and unpredictable, but he’s also remarkably calm. He’d be able to tear Sole’s life to pieces, to cut down any remaining loved ones who might seek to help safeguard them from him, and he’ll do it without so much as blinking an eye. He’s cold, so even when Sole has no other choice but to turn to him for comfort, when Kellogg is all they have left, he’s void of sympathy. That’s the greatest hell of all for Sole. Everything that he took from them, everything he's done to destroy their life, and yet... he will never apologize, never regret what he’s done, at least, as far as they can tell. Kellogg's been through that very same shit, and it hurt, but he made it through, and Sole will too. He'll make sure of that. Whether they want to or not.

MacCready:

M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

MacCready tends to be pretty blatant and honest, but sometimes his actions are more over-exaggerated when he’s with Sole. Though, it’s only because he cares so much. When he was with the gunners, he couldn’t be vulnerable or emotional, he couldn’t talk about Duncan, or Lucy, or his childhood, he had to be as stoic and ruthless as he could, just to fit in with those bastards. Now though, he feels like he can open up, show his true colors to his partner, even if they’re overexaggerated or ugly. That’s what partners are for though, right? They help you to find the best version of yourself, and they put up with the worst. If he can’t be real with them, then he can’t be real at all.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

It’s a bit difficult for MacCready to get used to affection again, he hasn’t been intimate in any sort of tender sense with anyone since his late wife, and initiating at first feels like some sort of betrayal.

Later though, as he grows more used to it, once he has that little heart to heart with Sole about their own feelings of guilt regarding their late spouse, MacCready finds it within himself to start being more physically affectionate with his partner. He still is more tentative than most, and so he tends not to force anything on Sole if they’re clear about not wanting it, but if they tolerate him, or even reciprocate, MacCready likes to rest an idle hand on them and steal kisses throughout the day. He’s young, and he’s in love again, so the more comfortable he grows, the more touchy-feely he gets.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

The merc isn’t one to hold back on the occasional mockery, he pokes fun at them, and makes rude comments every once in a while, but he wouldn’t say he’s cruel. If Sole thinks he’s bad, they should’ve seen the gunners, that shi-, that crap was cruel.

He’d be firm about certain rules, and might raise his voice or knock over some inconsequential items in his state of frustration at Sole’s potential lack of compliance, but he wouldn’t hurt them physically. He’s lost one person due to his own negligence, he’s not going to be the cause of hurting, or losing, another. He can’t.

C) -- Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

He’d be frustrated as hell. Why did they feel the need to resist him? He cares about them, they opened up to him, he thought they cared for him too! If that’s the case, why are they being so difficult?! MacCready blames it on their own feelings of guilt. He knows what it’s like to feel bad about being able to move on after losing the one you love, but it’s what their late spouses would’ve wanted, right? Can’t Sole see that? Them being together… it’s what’s right. They’re two sides of the same coin, two halves of a whole, they have so much in common; and he understands their reservations, but they can’t let that part of them win. One day they’ll see it his way, one day they’ll forgive themselves for moving on, and then they can be together, and he’ll never have to worry about them running from him, or refusing him like this again.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

He doesn’t see a reason to feel guilty, they both love each other, right? He’s doing this for both of them. Sole cares for him, they said so, this is what they want, they’re just a little confused right now, but that makes sense. After everything they’ve been through, they just need some time to move past it, MacCready gets it, and he’ll be there with them the whole way through. He knows that every time they come to him, admitting that they’re unhappy, or accusing him of being controlling, it’s really stemming from their own insecurities about their feelings for him, but he can be patient for the one he loves. They just need time.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

MacCready likes opening up to someone. He finally feels like he can, so he’s very vulnerable with them, more so than anyone he’s ever met, ever been with. Sole knows his past better than even Lucy did, and he likes it that way. Maybe if they see the way he opens up to them, how honest he is about his background, about his feelings, they’ll feel more inclined to be honest with him, to open up on their own and let him be there for them, the way they’ve been for him all these months.

A) -- Blood. How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

He’s killed over some of the smallest things. Killed for caps, killed for his family, killed for strangers with a contract, even killed over a spilled drink one bad night; killing for Sole would be easy. Spilling his own blood might be a little more difficult, and he would never put Duncan in harm’s way, but MacCready’s almost died for Sole before, just as they have for him. There’s no bond stronger than one like that, so if it comes to it, he’ll bleed for them, he’d kill for them, and if he thought Duncan was safe, that he would be looked after, MacCready would even die for his Sole.

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

MacCready has a hard time seeing it as “against their will,” since they were so open with him at the start. Now, he feels as though their hesitation is just a result of their own self-condemnation, and he feels bad for them. He empathizes, he really does, but at some point, they both deserve to move on, to be happy.

Unless Sole is very blatant about Mac crossing a line, he won’t even know he’s doing it, so he may end up taking away a few rights, or doing something Sole doesn’t want without even realizing it. He tries to be considerate of their feelings, but MacCready often deludes himself into thinking they don’t know what they want, or what’s best for them, but he gets it, he’s been there, and he wants to guide them through it, even if at first they seem unhappy. He knows it’ll all be for the best in the end.

Y) Yearn. How long do they pine for their darling before they snap?

He honestly doesn’t think much of Sole at first, just another boss, another job. But maybe there was a little something extra to them…but he’d tried not to linger on it. This was caps, nothing more. After they helped him with the gunners, and he learned more about their past though, he was hooked. The two of them have so much in common, and they’re not an assho-- a jerk, like literally everyone else he’s met in the wasteland (except Lucy). So, how could he not fall for them?

After that, his mind was made up. He made his confession, and they admitted they felt similarly, and that was the happiest day of his life. He had someone to love again, someone to live for by his side, someone who cares about him. All he needed now was Duncan, then they could be happy. And once Sole found Shaun, they could all be a family. It’s everything MacCready's has ever wanted.

Nick:

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He would mostly give punishments just by taking away some of their freedoms. If they want to act unruly, then he’ll just have to be sure to keep a better eye on them. Nick’s also big on lectures, making Sole feel as though he’s the victim in the situation, for having to deal with their horrible behavior when all he’s trying to do is look out for their safety. Usually he’ll sulk for a bit, and give them an exasperated sigh or two when they speak and after a day he’ll be gracious enough to forgive them. Nick makes it so that Sole doesn’t want to disobey him. Not with violent actions or shouted profanities, but with his own disappointment and clear distaste for their own actions when all he does is look out for their well-being.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Nick has just craved companionship for his entire existence. The flesh and blood Nick had Jenny, and that was the happiest he remembered being, and that wasn’t even him. Helping others brought synth Nick as much joy as he thought he would be capable of, but once he met Sole… What he thought was happiness was just blown out of the water. He wanted to be with them all of the time, didn’t want to lose this feeling, no matter what it takes.

He loves being around them, talking with them, being romantic with them, having the opportunity to feel more human than he ever has, and that’s all he wants. Maybe marriage is in the cards eventually, but if they just remain together, Nick doesn’t need a certificate to prove that he’s in love with them. As long as Sole sticks by him, he couldn’t care less what his future holds. Ideally, he would continue to help people with them as his partner throughout, and they can live a long and happy life together until a time Sole feels like retiring, then he’ll remain by their side until… Well, let’s not think of “untils” quite yet. They have a long way to go until then.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Nick isn’t a cruel man. He wouldn’t make the situation worse by making life hell for his partner, or by bad-mouthing them for their ignorance or misplaced trust, in truth, he wishes they hadn’t been so kind to him, shown him their capacity to love him, a capacity almost no one else shared. Then, maybe, he could’ve let them be. Now though, he needs them. They’re the only ones he can really relate to, the only ones from his time, the only ones with the capacity to love him despite what he is, and they, their relationship, needs to be protected. They don’t belong out here in the post-apocalyptic Commonwealth, and he wants to provide some semblance of familiarity if he can, to the life they knew before. How can he, out in the open, in the wastes? No, they have to be here for him, with him, if he is going to pull off this trick.

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Nick acts as though nothing is out of the ordinary. Sure, he’s more controlling than most, and Sole doesn’t really have the option to leave him, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t make them want to stay by his side all of the time regardless. He’s romantic, taking them out to dinner and bringing them flowers, taking long moonlit walks and giving soft kisses in the candlelight. He’s supportive, being the first to help them when they're in need, giving advice and pats on the back, being a shoulder to cry on and their voice of reason.

Nick wants them to be happy. Wants them to feel what he does when he’s with them. He loves Sole more than he thought was possible, and he makes sure they know that. It’s why they can’t leave, after all. After being this happy, after knowing someone so kind, so gentle, someone he can relate to, someone he has the capacity to love, how could he ever choose to be away from them?

Piper:

P) Patience. How patient are they with their darling?

It depends on the day for Piper. For the most part, she tends to be patient with Sole, she loves them and has had plenty of practice with her little sister on being more tolerant, no matter her mood at the time. However, she’s only human. If Piper is having a bad day, she’s bound to be more short with her love than usual. Especially if they are the cause of her rotten mood, Piper might raise her voice with them or take away a few of their privileges, as though they were a child of Nat's age, but she’s not likely to do much more than that.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Piper has never had an issue with her own independence, or with taking care of Nat on her own, but she does admit, the idea of having a companion to share her life with, one that will stick by her side, who she can depend on under pressure, who understands what it's like to be responsible for someone else's care… That doesn’t sound too bad. She’s not asking for much, she just wants their attention, their presence, their know-how as a parent, their support, then she could imagine herself sharing a life with someone, with Sole. They’re just… They’re perfect. It’s not Piper’s fault that they fit every bit of criteria she had for a romantic partner, so if they don’t like it, she’s sorry, but, people like Sole are impossible to find nowadays, and they just don’t get that, do they?

She doesn’t want much, she just wants them. She wants to be able to have a family, to have someone to navigate this world with, so she can have time to write and focus on her career without having to drag Nat into every little aspect of her life. She wants someone to help her, so that she can help Nat. That’s not too much to ask, is it?

P) -- Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Maybe she could move on if they just escaped. It’d be difficult, but if they felt that strongly about it, and she never saw them again, Piper could move on. It would take a long time though, and relationships just wouldn’t be in the cards for her anymore. If Sole died though… Man, she would go on, she would have to. For Nat’s sake, but she wouldn’t want to. She’d get even more lost in her writing, maybe have a few years of stories that hardly anyone could decipher, she might even separate herself from Nat, having her sister live with Nick or Ellie for awhile while she sorts herself out, afraid that what she’s become could rub off on the one she loves most, the only one left. Piper couldn’t do that to Nat.

After a few years though, the pain would start to dull. She would still pour herself into her stories, but her research would be well done and well founded now, she would be a bit more stable, and finally she would write her own obituary to the one she loved, before finally letting it go, bringing Nat back to live with her, and making the changes necessary to be the proper role model for her sister. So that Nat will never have to endure the pain of loss that Piper felt, and the regret that still haunts her for her treatment of Sole when they were by her side.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

It takes Piper a long time to open up and show Sole her vulnerable side. She’s really more comfortable at the receiving end of that sort of thing, but she does eventually let them in. The reporter may beat around the bush a bit though, whether she means to or not. It’s just difficult for her to open up too much. If Sole does so a bit on their own, it will prompt her to feel more comfortable more quickly though, and really, she loves talking about Nat.

Opening up about her past allows Piper a moment of distraction from what’s happening between her and Sole. She knows that she cares for them, and she knows their relationship is probably unhealthy, but the more she seeks their comfort, the more she hears about their past and reveals bits of her own, the more she realizes how perfect they are for one another.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She would regret it, and some nights when she knows they're unhappy, when they open up and are honest with her, she may come close to letting them go. But then she thinks about it. About how perfect they are, how they’re everything she’s ever needed in a partner, how she'll never be able to find someone that compares to them, how they met and felt that instant connection, how Sole woke from their ice nap at this exact year, this exact time, just so they could meet her. There’s no way all of that could be by coincidence, and Piper can’t let them slip away, not when it’s so clear they’re meant to be together.

Preston:

P) Patience. How patient are they with their darling?

He tends to be very patient with them. In all honesty, Preston is patient with everyone, and his darling is certainly no exception. However, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t lose it occasionally with them. The minuteman’s checkered past has left him with a temper in his moments of desperation, and there are certain actions that Sole may take that he will not put up with. If they become violent towards him, or any innocent people, he won’t be happy.

Generally his show of impatience comes with the accompaniment of a raised voice and, if they really push him, a physical response, such as striking a wall or kicking at some junk he found on the ground. He would never hurt Sole, or anyone else unless they were being dangerous, and it really takes a lot for him to get to the point of shouting, despite all he’s been through, but he will go there, if he feels he must.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

All the time. Every day he would consider whether or not what he did was in their best interest, or only in his. If they expressed unhappiness, he would feel extraordinarily guilty, and would constantly second-guess his own actions towards them, and the way he restricts their freedoms in a way he knew was wrong. But Sole saved him. Until he repays their debt he can’t leave their side, and even then…

They make him so happy, he loves them, and feels as though he can’t live without them. He wished he didn’t go to such drastic measures, but he’s never loved anything like he loves Sole, and if he lost them… Preston doesn’t think he could move on from that.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He tries to be honest with them, hoping his sincerity and desperation keeps them “willingly” by his side (don’t tell him that that’s manipulation). So, he often lets them know how important they are to him, how he couldn’t live without them, he’s honest about his past experiences and struggles, and he always makes sure they know that without their aid, he never would have made it out of Concord, or out of the spiral of guilt and grief that followed Quincy.

S) Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

Sheer desperation, and the need to survive. Preston knows that his behavior is unhealthy, that his dependency on his partner isn’t fair, but he doesn’t know what else to do. All he knows is that without Sole, he would be dead. So they have to stay by his side, it’s an instinct, it’s a necessity, a survival tactic, he doesn’t know where it came from, but he knows he needs Sole in his life, whether it’s healthy or not. He feels horrible, and maybe one day things will change, but for now, this feels like the only option in the world.

T) Tears. How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

It breaks his heart. Most nights he catches them like this, Preston curls up at their side (if they let him) and pulls them in tight, shedding his own tears and spilling a slew of apologies to them as he holds them close and wipes their cheeks dry with a gentle hand. He doesn’t want this either, doesn’t want to hurt them, and he doesn’t understand how he could make someone he loves this much, so incredibly unhappy. He wishes there was another way, and he tells them this, even as his grip tightens on their body at the thought of losing them.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Preston just wants them by his side. As long as they are helping the people of the Commonwealth, taking their responsibilities as General into account, and he’s with them, the minuteman is satisfied. That’s all he requires. Sole can speak to others, they can go where they please, eat and drink what they wish, take rests whenever they want, he just needs to be there with them through it all.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He wouldn’t, he couldn’t. Guilt trips are his only form of ammunition against his love. If Sole leaves him, they may never see him again. They are his will to live, wrapped up in one gorgeous person is his entire willpower to keep going; if they leave, they take that willpower with them. Their only punishment is living with their decision if they leave him, living with the consequences, living without him.

X6-88:

X) Xoanon. How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

X6 thinks Sole is just about the best thing that’s happened to the Institute since Shaun arrived and they began the process of creating Gen 3 Synths. He reveres them more than he has anyone else and is more devoted to them than he would ever like to admit. But romance-wise, he’s not sure he’s a good fit for Sole. He’s not even human, how could he ever care for them properly, in the way the director of the Institute deserves? He struggles with it for a long time before deciding that he cannot rest until Sole is his. Whatever they need, he has the ability to provide, all he needs are the proper circumstances and he believes he does have the capacity to be what is best for them.

6) -- Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It would annoy him more than anything. X6 is fully capable of restraining them, and Sole is aware of this. Why they would try to escape him, he doesn’t know; and why they would put in the effort to actually fight him on it, he can’t pretend to understand, but X6 will be able to put an end to it soon enough. He’ll make it known to them how ridiculous it is that they are trying to fight back, in both the way he easily seems to manhandle them, and in the way his unamused voice growls out in warning.

8) -- Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

X6 doesn’t tolerate anyone else taking up Sole’s attention. As far as he’s concerned, if you’re not the Institute, Shaun, or himself, you have no right to occupy Sole’s space physically or mentally. His control will go so far as to remove these human obstacles from the equation of Sole’s life. Permanently, if need be.

8) -- Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

The courser has had little to no reference for proper societal behavior for his entire existence. He’s not meant to have the feelings that Sole inspires, he’s never felt them before, and he has no idea how he’s meant to react, but if X6 is anything, he’s intense, and absolutely relentless. He puts his everything into whatever he’s doing, it’s what he’s always done, always been encouraged to do, so why would now be different?

A part of him understands that what he’s doing, how he’s acting, isn’t normal, and it certainly isn’t proper, given that he’s a synth and Sole is human. A very important human, at that, but he feels so strongly about Sole, he doesn’t know how else to express it. Even if it is wrong, if acting otherwise means giving up Sole, X6 doesn’t want to be right.

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i-cant-sing · 4 years ago

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I wonder what would happen if Y/N had a really bad day and just decided to pick a sibling from the Yan!Todoroki clan like a cat would pick its person and just?? Sit in their lap?? They'd say 'I had a terrible day, no torture today please' before taking their well-deserved nap lookin' all cute and peaceful. Then the sibling would be so proud and confused at the same time but really really happy like 'omg for real? Me? What's happening?? 🥺'. Bonus points if it's Dabi just having the widest grin on his face while staring straight at the rest of the fam seething with jealousy.

I saw your works btw and been inhalin em all cause they're all so good *chef's kiss*

-Vibin' anon

Yandere Dabi comforting sister reader

This is so cute omg. Thank u Vibin anon!

Check out my MASTERLIST for more!

Yandere Dabi:

Shotou had come to pick you up from school today. Even though he had a busy schedule himself, he still made time for you, just like the rest if your family.

"How was school?" He asked.

"Fine."

"Just fine? Wasn't your result supposed to come today?"

You nodded. "It did. I passed."

Shotoy smiled. "Thats great. Did you get your report card?"

You knew he was going to ask for it. You also knew that he already knew what grades you got.

You nodded and handed him the report card from your bag.

Shotou's face lit up when he saw your grades.

"You're first again. I'm so proud of you." He patted your head.

You smiled. "Thanks."

By the time you guys reached home, you already knew that your entire family was home. They always were when your result came. You knew the principal had already informed Enji of your grades, she always does.

When you entered the house, your family yelled "surprise!" You feigned shock as they hugged you and congratulated you on your achievement.

Rei had prepared a little feast for you, everything was made from scratch. Enji was beaming with joy, he was so proud of his little girl. Rei had made your favourite cake, kissing your cheek as you cut it. Enji had gotten you beautiful diamond necklace. Natsuo, Shotou and Fuyumi had gotten you some gifts as well, stuff you had vaguely mentioned about. Dabi wasn't home, but you didn't mind his absence.

Your family had planned to spend the night on the couch cuddling and doing a movie marathon, but when you asked them to excuse you for the night because you were feeling tired, they became a but worried. You reassured them that you just had a long day at school as well, and now that you were stuffed with Rei's delicious food, sleep was inevitable. They nodded, a bit sad that you wouldn't be joining, but understanding nonetheless.

You went up the stairs to your room, and as soon as you closed the door, the smile you had been displaying all night was wiped off.

You sat on your bed and recalled the events of the day. Tears pricked your eyes, but you kept yourself quiet. They're not worthy crying over, you reminded yourself. Still, you couldn't help but crumple up your report card and throw it in the dustbin.

Silent tears fell from your eyes, no longer being able to hold them in. God, its infuriating.

Suddenly, you heard someone knock on your bedroom door. You looked at the clock. 12 am.

Its Dabi.

You couldn't deal with him tonight. You remained silent, hoping he'd leave you alone.

But of course not.

You quickly turned away from the door as soon as you heard it open. Wiping your tears quickly, you heard Dabi come in.

"You brat. Why didn't you answer when I knocked?" He asked, pushing the door close with his foot.

"Leave me alone, Dabi." You were trying hard to stabilise your voice.

"Huh?! Is that anyway to talk to your favourite brother?" Dabi mocked as he pulled at your ponytail. You yelped before turning around to push him away.

Dabi was about to laugh at you when he suddenly noticed the your face. Your eyes were full of tears, lashes heavy with them. Your face was flush, your nostrils flared, your lips in a pulled in a tight scowl. Had you been crying? Or did he make you cry?

"Hey, I'm sorry-"

"Just leave me alone." You said as you angrily wiped the tears from your face.

Dabi was shocked to see you like this. He had never seen you cry, not even when he took his teasing a little too far. So, to see you react like this, it worried him a bit.

"Have you been crying? What's the matter? Did you fail or something?" His voice actually held some concern.

You shook your head, pulling your ponytail loose. "Its nothing. Just leave."

Dabi could see the pain in your eyes. What happened? He plopped down on your bed next to you. "Come on. Tell me." He poked your shoulder. "You know I won't leave until you tell me."

"Its nothing, really." You sniffled, avoiding his gaze.

"Did Enji say something?" Dabi asked, his voice taking a dangerous tone. "Look at me. Did he do something?" He's going to kill that bastard if he-

"What? No. God, just go."

Dabi let out a huff. He'll have to use another strategy. "Fine. Don't tell me. I'll just tell Shotou you have been crying, and then you can answer to him."

Shotou? God, he would just overthink everything and do something stupid.

You caught his wrist just as he was about to leave. "Do you have to be such a jerk every single day?" You glared daggers at him.

Dabi smirked before pulling his wrist away and plopping on the bed next to you. "Yes. Big brother privileges." He poked your cheek. "Now spill."

You looked at him, hoping he'd just get blasted magically. Idiot.

You inhaled deeply before closing your eyes. "Its stupid, really." Dabi stared at you, signalling for you to continue. "Something... happened at school." You paused. "Just a couple of assholes."

Dabi was attentive now. "Go on."

You looked down at your lap, playing with your fingers. "Some kids in my class... they said mean things about me."

"Bullying?" Dabi quirked an eyebrow.

You shook your head. "I- I don't think so. They just said that I only get the highest grade in class because of my dad. Like Enji bribes the school into giving me good marks." You sniffled. "They undermine me. They say I'm not good enough to be in their school, and that the only reason I got in was because of my surname."

Tears dripped down your face slowly, almost as if they were ashamed to fall.

You wiped them away harshly. "And it doesn't matter what I say. I've tried to befriend them, I've tried to get along with them, but they still ridicule me. Its frustrating. They... they don't understand that my only option is to be the best." You whispered the last part, but Dabi heard you loud and clear.

He sat up and gently gripped your chin, turning your face towards him as he narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean 'its your only option'?"

You rolled your eyes. "You know what I mean. I know that no one in the family cares if I get the highest marks or not but...I still have to live up to the family name. What will people say if the number 1 hero's kid is both quirkless and dumb?" Your lips wobbled.

Oh. Ohhhh.

You don't want to let down the Todoroki name; you don't want to let down Enji.

He already knew it was that shithead's fault.

Dabi sighed before pulling you close to him. Placing an arm around your shoulders while his other hand wiped your tears away.

Wanting to prove your worth, that you're a valuable asset to the family. Dabi never thought he'd see himself in you, or his younger self really.

"You're an idiot." Dabi began, carding his fingers through your hair. "You don't have to be the best. You're not expected to. You know, the family knows, hell even I know how hard you worked to get in that school. I've seen how you'd do all nighters, how many times you've turned down going out so that you could do well in your exams. But you don't have to do that." He tilted your chin up, staring into your glossy eyes. "We don't care what the public thinks of us. We won't care if you fail. We don't care you're quirkless. You're not expected to be anything but a good girl." He squished your cheeks together, making you look like a fish. "You just need to be safe. Do you understand?"

You sniffled as you nodded. "Yes. Thank you."

Dabi smiled. "Why didn't you tell anyone before?" You shrugged in response. "You know what would've happened if I said anything. They're already hesitant to let me go to school, this would just give them another reason to homeschool me. Besides, I didn't let their words get to me before, so it really wasn't a big deal." Before? You were about to continue but then kept your mouth shut. But Dabi saw that. He pulled you away from him, his eyes turning sharp as he raised his eyebrows. "But something else happened today as well?"

You averted his scrutinising gaze, keeping your lips sealed as you shook your head no. "Do not lie to me. Or I'll tell Shotou and Enji and then they can handle-"

Your eyes widened. "Do you ever stop making threats?" Rolling your eyes, you told him what happened. "It wasn't anything serious. One of those jerks... thought it'd be funny to try and kiss me. When he tried to force me, I slapped him. Really hard. My handprint still on his face." You smiled at that. "He said the only reason he wasn't using his quirk on me was because I was Todorokis charity case. Then he said that I should be grateful that he was going to kiss me, especially since no one cares about a quirkless, frigid bitch like me." You let out a humourless laugh, but Dabi could see the pain in your eyes. You gave a small smile. "Dont worry. I already know what they said isn't true."

Thats it.

Dabi was already planning murder. He's going to make those little shits pay for what they did to you. The nerve to not only bully you, but make you cry, and then touch you? Dabi is gonna make sure they get tortured in every way possible before he incinerates them-

"Dabi?"

Your soft voice pulled him out of his violent thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"Can you... stay the night?"

He looked at your tear stricken face, your eyes were still laden with tear drops, your nose red from all the sniffling.

How could he say no to you? You looked ugly.

"Its okay. You don't have to-" you were cut off by a pillow hitting your face.

"Move over, brat." He climbed in the bed with you, covering you both with the blanket. "And don't put your cold feet on mine." You smiled cheekily at that.

"Don't hog the blanket- why do you need it anyway?"you yanked the blanket.

Dabi pushed another pillow on your face, laughing as you punched his shoulder. "You're insufferable."you mumbled.

It took a while to get comfortable on your single bed, but it ended up with your head on his chest, while Dabi propped himself against the headboard.

"Thank you." You whispered.

Dabi hummed. "Dont think I don't know why you're doing this."

You smiled softly. He caught on to why you were keeping him home that night; you knew he would do something terrible to those guys. "Promise me you won't hurt them?"

Dabi remained silent. You pulled your head away to look up at him. "Dabi. Promise."

When he didn't reply, tears started forming your eyes. He sighed, before shoving your face back into his chest. "Fine, crybaby. I won't hurt them. Promise." You're such a brat, stopping him from doing his big brother duties.

You went back to snuggling him, not taking long for you to finally go to sleep. Once Dabi made sure you were asleep, he pulled out his phone and texted Toga.

"Need a favour. Up 4 stabbing?"

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azlovesem · 9 days ago

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Im just blocking that bitch right put. And im honna anihilate that post maline guy. I hog too good fuckn jokes on him about hos head his music his name ehet a goof. Ever sonce i first saw that goic inwanted to kull him. I dont kniw exactly but i want hom dead now.

Firget it i csnt be mad at you ill just live you alone in my own way. Ill just leacvevyou slone i cant go throug. With sttacking you. But the election is over we re going with trump. Because nobody attempted to maje amends. I heed a job too Emma we all gotta eat. Imsorry kid but im gonna torpedo the Harris campaign. Where you are and here, listen my bridtish buddy tod ne they want all thd i dians gone from your nstion. All if thrm slk immigrants pretty much. Gobd i dont know where. I killed 5 here as sn example yo modi. Tgey csnt be trustes their asy of life. I need to remove their leader and naybe most of rm leriod if things keep up. Im gonna support Trump. Then we cut a deal with the Rusdians then you dont even want yo fuckn know after that. We re gonna dplit the planet. Begire china gets too tough. Aftica midcleceast all if it. Even israel if they act up. Its a horribke plan but earth cantvdudtain us sll sweetoe. Its ok i cant fight you. You dont care who wins some election anyway whats that got to do wuth you. Id be open to other suggestionx only dtom you. Yeah im trying to force you whattya dumb? But i cant jolm you or kwt my oeolke do it. Post Msline i shoot yhat fuckn loser goof rapoer bitch 100000 times. Hes a goof stop it and ur froend if you can still call hed thaf is a supreme bitch skmetimes. She aint dhit we ll snipe her db nlonde ass if we want. Come in now we got sllllll the guns. You git a gun i hsve sbout 8000 of them. Shipped toms up hwre and sold em. Used yo. But ill likely end up back in a life of crime eventulky. Fixing and rigging elections weapimd sales coacaine. Moni dont like it but omce imlartying again ill be fobe in a cpl years anyway. Younwre actuslly imthought my only chance at salvation. I fidnt fo snything erong uiu fud. Now make amends. Everyone says its the right thing to do. Everyonecwsnts to see us makeup. Thry probably aanna astch us majeput yoo yhe losrrs. This is a lisers workf im the big winner. I wont kill malnd if you cone if not that guys dead. 1000 peecent dead. Ur a bitch malone such s lil nothing. Fuck uoj and ur fanx i just bscjed fien 10 people i. Pardsle who look like you. Makone bitch pussy i murdered over 28 people dtom shitty hoof hates by sll parkdake. Thats not a hood its bitch ville. We stab people who look l ill e you all the time there: its just a goof area mosg other hoids msje fun if it. If ur ftom parkdsle and you go to jsol you gef beat ip unless ur me. I wax on the worst range in th e don jsol 3 weeks i did fine. You would hace been dea. Maline or robbed. Theres a difference between real and a dumb ass butch rspoer. Homie theys sll if uou rspoers today im talkn to sll of you. The plsn is to extwrmonate yiu. Like rats.

Good morning

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nerice · 2 years ago

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oc ask meme! 1, 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19, 23, 29, 31, 37, 41, 43, and 47!

*rolls up my sleeves all the fucking way* let me introduce u to so many freaks. also linking my oc page again here not everyone's on there but for refrance!!!! this got long so im actually using the humble readmore function for once but im gonna showcase one answer up here and that is:

has anyone drawn fanart of your ocs? if yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)

i love all the art you n charlotte have drawn but this pic you did of reina. man (i cry everytime i look at it, she's SO BEAUTIFUL here you got her down better than i have ever drawn her <33333)

first oc ever: a young girl who gets her throat taken out by a big cat at a circus performance; who is now a young boy called honey who gets his throat taken out by kizuna while he wanders the swamplands searching for his brother! :D

personal favourite oc: absolutely without any doubt or competition whatsoever this goes to sky lmao. rabbit daughter of my life <33333

have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else? nope! all organically grown ocs in my brain tbh i find the practice of adoptables etc a little weird but that's just bc it, for me personally, conceptually, just does not work at all lmao

if you could make only one of your ocs popular/known, who would it be? nightmare scenario that guarantees callout posts tbh but after reading a billion articles on traditional female villains for my thesis i am slightly tempted to blaze knowledge abt faye lmao. high femme lesbian villain (power armor notwithstanding) we need more of em <3

are your ocs part of any story or stories? only have story ocs!! if i think up a guy he comes pre-equipped with problems which i will somehow slot into the grander verse, i don't make the rules

sunshine oc: alissa!!!! tragic girl who dies too young but before then is the absolute light in the life of everyone she touches ;_; there is one au where she lives and aims to use the lifesong to help more people, in the process of which she becomes eliada's sworn enemy & also possibly romances damia. long story

troublemaker ocs: handsdown linn wins this category lol. always up to no good, a nsfw criminal menace <3

oc otp: YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT IS JUMIE/REINA. thank you for drawing them make out it gives me life <33333

introduce an oc that means a lot to you (and explain why): gestures at reina. gestures at sky. gestures harder *camera pans over i am now on the floor sobbing* yknow?

introduce oc that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like: jumie used to be very mellow and leaned most strongly into the caretaking persona (it still comes out with sky a lot ;_;) but when i actually got around to writing her boy. oh boy. takes no shit and vibe checks every single person she comes across (for better or for worse) lawful good paladin behavior

which one of your ocs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going? leah!!! unfortunate tendency to disappear on people bc of whatever piqued her interest & also knows no fear/loves freaky and spooky stuff. noah, her scaredy-dragon bodyguard, is as exasperated as he is close to a heart attack at all times

pick one oc of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really) cait, avery, and jumie wld all run weapon aes focused blogs (swords, knives, spears&bows respectively) and would probably end up sending each other hatemail over their weapon preferences lmao

introduce an oc who is not quite human: kizuna!!! typical choice here lol but. fun-sized (bear shaped) omnivorous murder bunny who can shapeshift into the people she devours. has a little identity crisis from it eventually, its ok

do you have any certain type when you create your ocs? do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? it’s time to confess: i dont set out to create ocs so much as they just show up unasked on the doorstep of my brain but i absolutely love 2 give ocs a truckload of extremely visible scars (and some hidden ones for funsies) face scars are one of the greatest honors i can bestow <3

has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your ocs as their child? various yeah most frequently adopted are leah (statistical daughter of all time) and belle+sky for trauma reasons lmao

#aaaaaah sorry this was kinda basic. i think im more burned out than i realized :')#BOTTOM LINE IS THANK U FOR DRAWING AND CARING OCS I LOVE YOU #oc asks #askbox #ispybluesky

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luahecate · 3 years ago

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When I asked you guys to ask me Amphibia questions a lot of you asked how I felt about Season 3A. Now that the season is over I decided to just talk about it since yall seemed interested in what I think. First off, do I like season 3A? Yes???? I mean it has...a couple of problems.. The problem is we went from season 2 finale, true colors, to funny frog people in the human world, and it just feels so weird? We literally went from Marcy being KILLED and then we just went into new normal? The transition just feels weird and I wish we had gotten some sort of talking about true colors. We got two mentions of it, where Anne says Marcy has to be alive, and where Anne says she has to make up with Marcy and Sasha, but thats IT. Ive stated before its okay for Anne to not talk about it, ITS IN CHARACER. But Sprig? no?? I get it if Sprig is being a good friend and not asking, but you would think he would mention something? In season 2 he brings up Sasha a lot, hes KNOWN for bringing up things!! Heck even if he wasn’t bringing up Marcy, he hasn’t mentioned Sasha. ALSO, theres the whole fact that Marcy literally saved Sprig and I haven’t seen anyone in the show talking about that. Another issue I have is the FBI, the Wu’s, and the Waybright’s. The FBI is investigating the frogs, which makes sense they should be, but you would think the FBI would be like “Oh wait- this girl just showed up and her friends aren’t with her what did she do to them” BUT NO. Seriously!! I dont wish any harm another Anne or stress its just why isnt see being investigated for murder or kidnapping. Its also weird that the Wu’s and Waybright’s haven’t shown up. Lets say the Wu’s moved away already, which okay makes sense your daughter was gone for 5 months she may be dead so lets move on. BUT THE WAYBRIGHTS?? im not sure if this is all leading up to showing how bad Marcy’s and Sasha’s homes are, maybe they haven’t contacted the Bounchoys because maybe there too busy in work or something? It doesnt make sense still though, like wouldn’t those kids from the school paper start asking questions about Marcy and Sasha? Okay now onto the good stuff: The new characters are so much fun!! God they just bring me so much joy. Im honestly happy that were getting more nerdy characters (to replace that gap in my heart of loosing Marcy-) Right now my favorite human character is Mrs.bounchoy like honestly who gave her the right to be so great. Anne’s parents are so funny and awesome and support Anne. I like Mr.X hes funny and a new interesting villain (although Idk how hes gonna be wrapped up since Darcy and Andrias are our villains) I just love em all. Okay now we can talk about the Darcy in the room.

I.LOVE.DARCY. lets talk about Olivia and Yunan for now. That episode is by far the best episode in season 3A. Its what we all expected season 3 to be. Its the episode that makes sense coming from true colors. Im not even mad Marcy only got 1 episode (I mean she had to heal for a bit that sword like destroyed her body-). This episode is so distributing while also being really funny at the same time?

Drunk Marcy is literally so funny, shes just vibing the entire time and the whole “ohhh its a projection you know like *finger snap* VR!” “vrrrrr???” “its not real ya goof!!” always gets me BUT THEN. Marcy’s fear is one of the best scenes in Amphibia by far, it is so good and fully shows Marcy’s guilt. It sets up so much for the rest of season 3B and its great. Ill do a separate analysis eventually. AND THAT LAST SCENE. it is so scary and upsetting. Its worst than true colors because Marcy is screaming and very clearly in pain. We know things aren’t gonna go well for her in the future sadly because of this one scene. Overall do I like season 3? Yes. But do I have some issues with it? Yes Did these issues ruin my experience? No. Season 3A is great and im excited for Season 3B but it better fix these issues-

#amphibia #amphibia analysis #amphibia season 3 #amphibia season three #amphibia anne #anne boonchuy #amphibia marcy #marcy wu #amphibia sasha #sasha waybright #olivia and yunan #the new normal

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lloydskywalkers · 4 years ago

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any port in a storm

Pixal and Lloyd and the evolving nature of friendship, as highlighted by the regular burning down of your city.

(desperately trying to break through writer’s block and classes again, this was supposed to be under 2k and it is...very much not hdfjkgh but! i’ve been meaning to write for Pixal and Lloyd for a while so here are a whole bunch of feelings about the two of them and s8)

Pixal meets — truly meets — Lloyd Garmadon shortly after his brother’s been blown to pieces.

She says truly, because if you ask her, Pixal will tell you she met Lloyd Garmadon at exactly 8:48 in the evening outside his father’s monastery, moments before a horde of nindroids led there by Pixal herself descended upon them.

But Lloyd argues that since they said about two words total to each other, it doesn’t really count as meeting, and by the time Pixal’s spending the better part of her day with him running high and low around Ninjago City, she’s learned that it’s easier not to press the point.

Lloyd can be stubborn, like that.

She’d first learned that when she’d met him, just after they’d lost Zane. That loss hadn’t lasted long, especially for Pixal, but the immediate aftermath of it had been devastating. She’d watched with blank eyes as the team had fractured, splitting at the seams as they all fled their separate ways, too heartsore and dizzy with grief to do much otherwise.

All of them had fled, save Lloyd. She hadn’t paid him much attention before that point, the surprisingly small bearer of the Golden Power. Of course, he wasn’t the bearer of that power anymore, but his eyes alone had shown the experience of it. There’d been a brief, lost look that had crossed his face as the others had mentioned leaving, before it had been swept under a mask of stubborn, determined blankness. He wouldn’t be leaving. Someone had to stay behind and watch out for things, he’d claimed, even as the loss had bled through his voice.

Pixal hadn’t quite grasped the concept of empathy at that point, but she’d felt something dangerously close to it.

At any rate, the only interaction they’d had alone was brief. In fact, the only one Pixal can truly remember — and her memory never fails — is the quick exchange they’d had in the hospital lobby directly after the battle. The hospital was for Mr. Borg, and for the ninja’s minor injuries.

There was nothing any hospital on earth could do for Zane.

Pixal had found herself next to Lloyd in the waiting room, trying to distract herself from those thoughts while Lloyd stared at the stark white tiling with dull eyes.

“They never mentioned what your power was,” she’d asked him, almost absently. Collecting data, processing information — anything she could do to distract from the crushing grief.

“Oh.” Lloyd had blinked, startling back into awareness. He’d suddenly looked painfully young. “It’s, ah, I guess it’s just green, now.”

It had been Pixal’s turn to blink. “Green.”

“Yeah.” Lloyd had bit his lip, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly, two habits he’ll never quite lose. “I mean — it’s more than that, but it’s like — energy, I guess, is the best way to put it?”

“Interesting,” Pixal had remarked.

“Yeah.”

They’d stared at each other in silence after that, before they’d both been called off to other errands — and then they were having Zane’s funeral and then Pixal was making realizations she never got to tell anyone, and that had been that in her early introductions to Lloyd Garmadon. Quiet, awkward, and possessing an incredible power he hardly even knew the name of.

Looking back, Pixal figures her introduction hadn’t gone much better.

They’d continued as passing acquaintances as time went on, separated by danger and the confines of Zane’s head, and Pixal had figured that’s all they’d ever be. But then their Sensei goes missing and, despite Pixal’s increasing disappearances on Zane as she rebuilds her own body, she’s been given the role of watching out for Ninjago city along with Lloyd.

She quickly learns that quiet is not a term fit for Lloyd Garmadon when you’re trapped alone with him.

************

“How is there not a single station playing actual music?” Lloyd seethes, flicking through the channels almost manically. “It’s two am, who’s gonna be listening to your stupid commercial for toothpaste now, are you kidding me?”

“Statistically speaking, this is the prime time for long-distance driving near Ninjago City,” Pixal supplies, her voice a hint scratchy where it comes through the his car’s radio speakers. “Or, if you factor in the construction in the east district, there could still be traffic from late-night bars.”

Lloyd groans, thunking his head against the steering wheel as another ad screeches through the small space. “Wonderful.”

“Your vocal tones suggest you find it otherwise.”

“Dont trust ‘em, my vocal tones are traitors.” As if to solidify his point, Lloyd’s voice cracks in the middle of his sentence, shooting up an octave higher. Lloyd goes bright red, and thunks his head against the steering wheel again.

Taking pity on him, Pixal aims for reassurance. “It is normal for your voice to break, Lloyd. It shouldn’t last too long.” She pauses, momentarily scanning through another article. “On second thought, this one suggests it could also take two to three years for your voice to stabilize.”

Lloyd gives a strangled moan. “End me.”

“Unfortunately, that would defeat the purpose of why I’m here in the first place.”

Lloyd tilts his head, cracking an eye open as he glances at the camera feed he knows she’s watching him from. “Unfortunately, huh,” he muses. “So you’re saying if Zane hadn’t made you promise to look out for me, you would end me?”

“That — no, that is not — of course I wouldn’t end you,” Pixal backtracks. An odd feeling flickers through her, almost as if she’s lost her place, floundering.

Or embarrassed might be more accurate, she thinks wryly. She briefly considers projecting a a glaring face at Lloyd from the monitor. This is his fault. She rarely stuttered before Lloyd started teasing her at all hours of the morning.

“I mean, you wouldn’t be the first,” Lloyd continues, conversationally. “And if we’re being honest, I’d definitely rather you be the one to off me, instead of like, random bad guy number eighty-five—”

“I know you think you are funny,” Pixal cuts over him. “But casually planning for your death is something Kai listed I was not to let you do. Also, it is not nearly as funny as you think it is.”

“Ouch,” Lloyd mutters, though he looks chastised. “Never mind, you just took me out in one sentence.”

Chastised might be the wrong term.

Pixal studies him through the monitor, then sighs. “I am, however, honored you think highly enough of me to offer the right to murder you,” she gives in.

She’s rewarded as Lloyd breaks into a bright grin.

He still looks painfully young these days, but it’s less obvious. His voice is pitching lower and he wears his hair different, and he’s gained a whip-like tendency to quip at people, as Pixal’s experienced firsthand. Kai calls it sass in grumbling but fond tones, and Nya calls it snark somewhere between the fourth book series she’s sent for Pixal to try.

The ninja have been kind like that, sharing the interests they have in an attempt to make her feel…well, more human, she supposes. Less confined to a voice in a computer. Of course, Pixal isn’t confined to a voice in a computer anymore, but they don’t know that yet. She’ll tell them someday soon, she promises herself. Any day now.

In the meantime, it’s easy enough to keep up with Lloyd by lurking in his car radio, as he spends half his time in there anyways.

************

“You’d think we’d have found their hideout by now,” Lloyd notes, as they wait in a darkened alleyway again. It gives them an excellent view of the major highways, so if the rumored biker gang does show up, they won’t miss it.

If they show up being the key point.

“Whoever their leader is, they certainly know how to keep a low profile,” Pixal answers, closing out another dead end police report in frustration.

“It’s weird,” Lloyd says, propping the notebook he’s sketching in on his knee as he squints at the paper. “Normally the boss types aren’t this quiet. They like to show off, y’know? Make a big scene, dramatic speeches and all.”

“Are you referring to the villains, or yourselves?”

“Touché,” Lloyd snorts. “But still, you gotta admit it’s weird they haven’t even made any demands. What’s their end game here, elaborate advertising for motorcycle design?”

“I would hope not,” Pixal says. “Their color coordination is lacking.”

Lloyd fights back a smile, his pencil scratching as he shifts his notebook again. “I don’t know, I kinda like the punk look.”

“I noticed that, when you tried to redecorate the car.”

“Hey, skulls are cool.”

“They are also conspicuous, especially when they come in acid green colors.”

“Everyone’s a critic,” Lloyd sighs, making a face as he scrubs the eraser across the paper. Pixal tries to tilt the camera further, to see what he’s drawing tonight, but the angle he’s holding it at remains just out of sight.

She could probably guess what he’s drawing, if she tried. The notebook is one they’ve been steadily working their way through on these late-night patrols, the pages filled with little hangman games and Lloyd’s sketches of animals and his teammates. He’s drawn her a few times from memory, and she’s been tempted to ask him to draw her in the new Samurai X armor more than once.

Soon, she tells herself.

“What are you drawing?” she finally asks, curiosity getting the better of her.

Lloyd’s cheeks tinge pink, and he quickly plasters the notebook to his chest, hiding it entirely from view. “Nothing.”

Pixal waits, letting the silence fill with her judgement. “Lloyd, I have seen your drawings before.”

He doesn’t reply, and Pixal tries again. “It gets boring, being stuck with the car monitors for eyes.”

“I know you can hack other cameras,” Lloyd mutters, but he sighs, relenting as he turns the notebook over. Pixal’s eyes rake over the detailed sketch — it’s a comical little thing of her and Lloyd, jammed together on a tiny lifeboat in the middle of a darkening ocean. She can spot the smudges where he’s redrawn her head several times, and the numerous attempts he’s made at his own hair. Pixal studies Lloyd’s portrayal of himself, which is noticeably lacking in facial features. While Lloyd draws the others plenty, it’s a rare occasion that he draws himself, and she can’t help but be curious.

“I thought you were drawing the others again,” she admits.

“They’re on the ship,” Lloyd says, absently. “I’ll draw them when they remember to pull us back in.”

There’s nothing bitter in his tone to suggest it has any bearing on their actual lives, but the lost expressions Lloyd ends up giving their tiny caricatures feel familiar nonetheless.

“Zane has assured me they will be back as soon as they can,” Pixal speaks ups quietly.

Lloyd finally looks up fully, and flashes the monitor a smile. “I know,” he says. “So we better have this thing busted by the time they do, or they’ll never let us run a city on our own again.”

“If only we were truly running the city,” Pixal grumbles. “I could do a better job in two days than the current leaders could do in a year.”

“I’d vote for you,” Lloyd says, sincerely.

It’s a sweet gesture, but Pixal is unable to resist. “You don’t know how to vote.”

“Yes I do, it’s not hard!”

“Really? Then why are you not currently registered in the Ninjago voting system?”

Lloyd makes a strangled noise. “That’s a thing?”

She’s unable to keep the smugness from her voice. “I make my point.” Lloyd scowls, and scribbles a mustache on his drawing of her in revenge.

Pixal thinks it looks nice nonetheless.

************

She can’t really hold it against Lloyd for talking as much as he does, considering she does the same. It gets dull, sitting on patrol for hours on end, and there are only so many hours of light reading they can do before the silence begins to drive them both insane.

Pixal finds herself talking about more useless things with Lloyd than she has in her existence, pointless conversations in circles with each other. She also finds she doesn’t entirely mind. She’s become quite good at quipping back and forth with him, at least. It’s different than the kind of talk she has with Zane, lacking in the depth of feeling with the love they share. Her exchanges with Lloyd are lighter, though that’s not to say they’re less sincere.

For example, Zane hasn’t tried to teach her how to redesign a gi in poor lighting in the early hours of the morning because he’s bored out of his mind, that’s for sure.

“I’m teaching you how to sew,” Lloyd corrects, wincing as he accidentally stabs himself with the needle. “And I’m not redesigning the whole thing, I’m just adding some designs to spice it up.”

“I did not know you were allowed to wear colors other than green,” Pixal comments.

Lloyd pauses, squinting at the monitor. “You’re teasing me,” he finally says. “You’re making fun of how much green this gi has in it.”

“I would never,” Pixal replies, her tone flat and even. “The intricacies of your human humor evade me—”

“Human humor, nice—”

“—unlike the unusually bright shade of green you’ve chosen will fail to evade any eyes of your enemies.”

“I knew you were making fun of me!” Lloyd accuses, then flinches as he stabs his finger again trying to point at her. “And bright colors are our thing. Being subtle is, uh…not. Usually.”

Pixal is losing the battle to laugh at his expression by the minute. “I am shocked.”

Lloyd glares at the monitor, shifting his sewing to rest on his knees as he slouches in the car seat. “How’d you even get so good at sarcasm, anyways,” he mutters. “Zane still doesn’t get it half the time.”

“Perhaps it is part of my glowing personality,” Pixal says. Lloyd gives a huff of laughter, relenting.

“Fair enough,” he says, shifting in his seat again. “Fine, you win. The green is probably too bright, but that’s not the point. I’m gonna show you how to do a backstitch."

Pixal falls quiet, letting Lloyd gesture with the needle as he explains. There are a hundred, a thousand tutorials she could pull up online, digitized knowledge instantly learned on all the countless types of stitches she could use, sorted and categorized in neat columns of use and effectiveness. All of them more detailed, more easily understood than Lloyd’s absent rambling and unsteady hands as he struggles with the end of a knot.

Not one of them will care whether or not Pixal learns the odd way Zane likes to loop his stitches, or will quietly add which stitches knit skin back together quickest.

So Pixal ignores her programming, and does her best to follow Lloyd’s rambling instructions, watching as his scarred fingers tug another thread of dull gold through the green mess of fabric, the city quiet around them.

“You never did tell me where you learned how to sew,” Pixal says, as Lloyd starts up a new thread of black on the other side of the gi. “Was that something the others taught you in training?”

“They’d have to know how to be able to teach it,” Lloyd snickers. “And, uh, no. I taught myself to back at Darkley’s.”

“Oh,” Pixal falters. She’s heard about Darkley’s, both from Zane and the legal reports she’s read online. Neither gave a positive impression of the place. Her mind is suddenly filled with images of a younger Lloyd trying to give himself stitches, and her heart twists.

Lloyd starts, seemingly having picked up on her train of thought. “I mean, I did it for fun, mostly. I like sewing,” he explains. “It’s useful. You can pull things back together, and fix ‘em.”

Pixal is quiet, but she hopes Lloyd takes her silence as agreement with his motive. She likes to think he knows her well enough for that, by now.

************

Pixal finds, somewhere during their fourth month alone, that she’s glad the team elected to stick her and Lloyd together. Not because she doesn’t want to be with Zane — there’s never a moment she doesn’t miss him, and with every day that passes her resolve to keep her secret from him grows weaker, as the longing for actual connection grows stronger.

But there are conversations she can have with Lloyd that she can never have with Zane, and the dangerous thing about spending time with Lloyd, Pixal finds, is that they’re more similar than she’s realized.

“Sometimes I think I’m jealous,” Lloyd whispers to her one night. It’s one of the bad ones, the ones where their enemies struck too sudden to stop, and the mission ends in the hospital. “I think I’m jealous of Zane, and I hate myself for it.”

Pixal is quiet, trying to pick apart the tone of his voice in the words he’s just spoken, and factors in the victims they’ve just left behind at the hospital. She finds herself no closer to an answer.

“Is it the metal skin part?” she finally asks, though she knows that’s wrong. “The, what was it, technical immortality?”

“No,” Lloyd shakes his head. “I’m not afraid of dying,” he says emphatically, his fingers fluttering at over the steering wheel, tapping incessantly with unspent energy. “I don’t want to, but that’s — it’s not what I’m scared of. I’m more scared of how I go out.”

He swallows, and his fingers move to dance over the woven bracelet on his wrist instead, twisting at the tiny beads and tracing senseless designs in constant, steady movement. It’s a motion he does often, and it had puzzled Pixal at first. She’d decided to write it off as an odd tick, a way to spend excess energy.

Now, she recognizes the desperate kind of reassurance that movement gives. She understands too well the need to remind yourself that you can move — that your body will obey you and you alone.

Pixal thinks back to the other factors in tonight’s accident, of the way the drugged man’s eyes had cleared when they’d finally turned him over to the police, the way he’d sworn he’d never do such a thing in his right mind. She thinks of the way the first victim had thrown themselves over their companion.

That victim hadn’t made it to the hospital.

“Ah,” Pixal says, quietly.

She’s silent again, and she thinks back to when she’d met him, the very first time. She recalls the way her programming had rebelled against her in favor of the Overlord, corrupting her body and forcing it against her, twisting everything she was and wanted to be into something different.

She thinks back again, to the searing-hot anger, the terror, the despair as she was torn apart, piece by piece like a machine, burning out at the whims of another. Her end purposeless, her demise belonging to someone else, just like every other part of her.

She thinks of the last glimpse she’d caught of Zane, bright and beautiful as a supernova. Burning with the terrible brilliance of his own, determined choice. Terrible, because the death of something always is. Beautiful, because it was his own. Zane died, not a machine, not a weapon, not a tool of anyone or anything, but as himself. Zane died to save the ones he loves. Pixal could’ve died for spare parts.

Never again, she promises herself. If she goes out, she goes out on her own terms. This time, they choose the end of their own destiny themselves.

In hindsight, it’s the kind of promise they’re both too young to make, but neither of them have ever seen themselves as such, and promises like that are easy.

“Love can be terrible, sometimes,” Lloyd murmurs. Pixal watches him scrub at the blood on his uniform, and thinks how ironically well-timed it is that he finished the stitching on his new gi this morning. “Sometimes I forget how ugly it can be.”

************

The end of their nighttime stakeouts begins with a break-in at Mr. Borg’s tower. Lloyd argues that she should get to call it her father’s tower, if she wants, but the ninja aren’t the only ones Pixal’s hiding herself from.

And then Lloyd gets very tense at the thought of fathers very fast, and they never finish the conversation.

They stay at the edge of the bridge long after the parachute, emblazoned with the unmistakable visage of Lloyd’s father, disappears from sight. Pixal wonders if it’s burned into Lloyd’s eyes, like the way she’s read black spots linger in humans’ vision after they’ve looked at something too bright. The way Lloyd stares at the river, his shoulders tense and his teeth worrying at his lip, she thinks she might be right.

They’re waiting on the report from the commissioner —they’re waiting for anything, anyone who can offer them any explanation of what’s going on. Pixal’s reminded of how much she loathes this kind of waiting.

“It could be—” Lloyd begins, then breaks off, his voice wavering. He swallows, and Pixal can see the way his fists clench tightly from the cameras they’ve put in his car. There’s a fierce part of her that longs to reveal herself, to meet his eyes herself and offer some semblance of comfort. But there’s a time and place for things, and Pixal isn’t ready.

“It could be anything,” Lloyd finally continues, his voice small. “It could — it doesn’t mean anything. It could mean nothing, right?”

Pixal is silent, her mind racing. She’s run the calculations over and over in her head already, scouring the internet for anything related to the bikers. She’s been foolish, she realizes — they both have. Letting the gang go unnamed for so long, thinking nothing of it. Now, with the name flashing vibrant across Pixal’s vision, a part of her wants to let them go nameless just a bit longer.

Before she can answer, Lloyds phone goes off with a sharp ping, just as Pixal’s sensors alert her to the message from the commissioner. Lloyd snatches for his phone like it’s on fire, and Pixal’s already scanning the message frantically, as if she can salvage this if she’s fast enough, save Lloyd from this one pain.

Lloyd’s gotten much better at reading quickly though, these days.

She can pinpoint the moment he reaches the last paragraph, because his breath hitches. There’s a long, pressing pause of silence, Lloyd’s hands trembling as they clutch weakly at his phone. Then it’s punctured by a reedy, wheezing gasp, and Pixal’s suddenly wishing she’d revealed herself after all.

Instead, all she has is her voice as Lloyd crumples, crouching over in visible distress. Pixal’s mind races, recalling everything Zane’s ever told her about his team, the way their panic manifests in different shades. Lloyd’s is quiet but desperate, rapid breathes that stutter as his eyes slide more and more into a frightening kind of blankness.

“Lloyd, please, listen to my voice,” she begs, trying to reach him in the only way she can. “Please, you have to breathe—”

“He’s gone,” Lloyd rasps, unhearing of her words. “He’s s’posed to be gone, it’s supposed to be over, I’m supposed to be done—”

Pixal fights back the sense of overwhelming helplessness. She knows loss. She knows how to finish his sentence. He’s supposed to be done grieving, done mourning, done clinging to false scraps of hope that his father isn’t lost forever only to be met with heartbreak.

And now, to be met with the possibility of something so much worse.

“We’ll stop them,” she tells him, unflinching. “We won’t let it happen.”

Lloyd’s eyes are a vivid green where they stare at her through the monitor, almost ghostly in the misting light reflecting from the river.

He’s silent, but Pixal is, too.

Pixal remembers the way her head had spun when she’d first picked up the traces of Zane in the system, how the world had rushed then steadied, flooding with color as she’d realized he might not be lost after all. She remembers the surging, overwhelming flood of joy, that someone she’d thought she lost might live after all. She remembers being so happy, at even the smallest chance to get him back, because the voice was Zane’s, without a doubt.

She watches the color seep from Lloyd’s expression as his shoulders shudder, the words from the commissioner’s message almost echoing through the air. Watches the terror as the both of them fill the silence.

Will we?

The radio scratches, as if echoing Pixal’s anxiety. Love can be terrible, sometimes. She’s underestimated how it also be so cruel.

************

She’s also, apparently, underestimated how the universe on the whole could be so cruel.

She should’ve revealed herself to them from day one. That way, when Harumi’s corrupted programming suddenly ravages through her like an electric shock, she could be reassured they’d at least be familiar with the person they were fighting.

Instead, she doesn’t even get to scream. Pixal’s only able to force out a desperate, broken warning before she’s lost again, drowning in her own body as she’s forced under. Furious panic grips her as she screams without lungs, bashing herself against the overwhelming helplessness that’s taken over her.

Not again, not again, not again—

Her limbs creak and jolt against her will, lashing out at the people she cares most about, and Pixal can’t even rage back in her own voice. She’s sworn, she’s promised herself she’d never let anyone do this to her again — she’s sworn she’d die before she let someone reach into her head and snatch control away, and yet here she is, frozen as her body’s used to target her friends.

If she could cry, she might.

There’s not much more to say than that. She breaks free, her body her own once again, but by then it’s too late.

************

If Pixal had the same gift of foresight that Zane did, maybe she would have seen it coming. Maybe she’d have remembered how similar her and Lloyd are, and that this kind of pained desperation always yields impulsiveness and mistakes.

She doesn’t, though. She barely even manages to do what she’s trying to, which is convincing Lloyd to join the others while they celebrate their victory. Their off-key singing is something he normally wouldn’t hesitate to join in on, she thinks, and she hates Harumi a little more.

Maybe she’ll try his mother next. The expression on Lloyd’s face screams unapproachable, and remains fixedly sullen.

Almost to her surprise, he meets her eyes as she draws near— it’s odd, being able to meet his back — and his own eyes are dark, from despair over Harumi or despair over his father, Pixal isn’t sure. She’s thinking it might be both, when his eyebrows crease, and a flicker of concern cuts through them instead.

“You good?”

It takes her a moment to realize why he’s asking, but the answer is obvious. Her head tilts downward, and she watches as her fingers curl and uncurl. Her movements, her choices. She lets out an even breath.

“As I can be,” she replies. Lloyd nods, and his eyes are understanding. His lips twist in a scowl.

“She shouldn’t have done that to you. That was a low blow.”

Pixal’s mouth curves into a humorless smile. “That it was. She’s rather good at those, isn’t she.”

Lloyd’s eyes shadow again, and he looks away, crossing his arms. “This isn’t supposed to be about me,” he mutters.

“Yes, it is,” Pixal counters. “It is why I came over here, in the first place. She hurt—”

“All of us, and who’s fault is that,” Lloyd snaps, his arms crossing tighter.

“I would hope you know it’s hers,” she says, holding firm.

Lloyd looks away again, biting his lip, and Pixal shifts anxiously, rolling her wrists. The sensation of control sliding away still haunts her, worse than it had the first time. She should be better than this, she tells herself hotly. She’s lived without a body long enough that losing it so briefly shouldn’t effect her this much.

Curse her programming, she thinks, tapping agitatedly at the banister. She knew she should have reinforce it sooner.

“Hey, um.” Lloyd is looking at her again, hesitant. He twists at his bracelet, and his eyes lose a fraction of that darkness. “Kai made this for me, after Morro,” he says. “I kept shredding the sleeves of my uniform, so he told me to mess with this instead, when I needed to remember that…that I was in control.”

He shrugs, hesitant. “We could make you one too, if you wanted. It helps, having something.”

Pixal lets out a steady breath, despite not actually needing to. The action is grounding, she’s found. “I would like that.”

Lloyd gives her a ghost of a smile in return. “Soon as this is over, then.”

There’s a heavy weight to his words, and Pixal’s eyes narrow.

“Lloyd,” she says. He looks at her, his eyes dark. “Don’t do anything foolish.”

He’s quiet, not meeting her eyes, and this is where Pixal should stop him. This is when she should see the end of the road they’ve been on since they started this, and force him to turn before it’s too late.

“I know what I’m doing.”

She doesn’t.

************

Lloyd is battered and bleeding by the time they drag him onto the ship, a gruesome portrait of cruelty. Pixal is frozen as she watches him writhe in Kai’s hold, his screams cracked and wet as he thrashes erratically like a broken thing.

Nya is already barking orders before they’ve even gotten Lloyd fully on the ship, and Zane is running scans with a horrified, wavering focus. Pixal follows Cole as he carries Lloyd to the medbay with a blank numbness, the rush of wind streaming past the Bounty sails thunderously loud in her ears.

This isn’t Lloyd, she thinks, staring at his crumpled form. Lloyd isn’t this battered, broken shell of a person. Lloyd isn’t hazy eyes that fail to recognize them and frantic murmuring through bloody lips. Lloyd is bright-eyed and gentle and would rather die before he screams the way he does when Cole moves him to the table.

Lloyd is her friend, and this is where that promise they made has led them. She knows why Lloyd set out for the prison, hot on the collapse of his own star. She also knows he wouldn’t have chosen to burn out like this.

Cole calls out for Zane, his voice ringing in panic as Lloyd screeches in pain again. Pixal thinks of quiet words in the safety of his car, and she feels sick. This is the ugliness of love, the terrible, hideous side of it.

And Lloyd would hate it, if he could see himself, if he were any semblance of lucid. He’d hate to know just how much better he was at breaking himself than Morro ever was.

Zane is gentle as he pushes past her, but Pixal can feel the tremble in his hands. He’s every bit as rattled as she is, if not more so — Zane’s heart is larger and softer than hers has ever been, and he cares about each and every one of them with a painful intensity. It’s a cruel thing, to have to pull those same people back together with your own hands.

Kai’s eyes are streaming as he clutches at Lloyd’s wrists, pinning him in place. Zane’s hands waver again over one of the jagged wounds near Lloyd’s ribcage, the green of his uniform already dyed dark in blood, soaking over the careful stitches Pixal watched him put in himself.

Pixal finally finds her footing, reminding herself of the solid wood beneath her feet. She recalls the steady, smooth stitch Lloyd’s scarred fingers traced out for her.

“Here.” She takes the needle from Zane’s hands, squeezing his briefly before letting go. “I can do it.”

She sets the needle against Lloyd’s skin and wonders what kind of stitch it’d take to pull your heart back together.

************

Pixal cannot cry. It’s one of the features Mr. Borg spent hours debating, weighing the pros and cons of giving her the ability before he was truly sure how rust-proof she was. He’d never gotten the chance to, as the Overlord had interrupted him, then Pixal had lost any body to give the ability to cry to, which had eliminated the need entirely.

She cannot cry, but she can hurt, and the rain that streams through her hair, dripping down her forehead spotting raindrops on her cheeks, could be tears if she pretended.

She doesn’t, though, because tears are a waste of water and overall useless in the grand scheme of things. She doubts they’d have helped her fare any better in the battle with Colossi, either.

Tears won’t bring anyone back.

Lloyd cries anyways. She can’t see him, but she can hear it in his voice, the way it wavers and breaks over the radio, nasally tones pronounced.

He’s barely able to gasp a few coordinates to her before he cuts the radio off abruptly. Pixal’s spent enough time with him to envision his scarred fingers snapping it off with a particular desperation, green sparking from his hands in distress.

She reminds herself those sparks are gone, now, bled away into nothing like the vivid green of Lloyd’s eyes had. The thought makes her sadder than she’d expected. She had a joke, about his eyes, she had wanted to make. Now that she has a body, and her own set of glowing green eyes, she’d — there was something he would’ve laughed at, she thought —

It doesn’t matter, now. Neither of them are likely to laugh anytime soon.

The coordinates blink brightly in her vision, and she’s almost surprised she managed to key them in. She’s running on autopilot, she supposes. It could be ironic — she’s been so desperate for control, it’s been so important that she’s the one feeling. Now, she’d give anything not to feel at all.

She lets out a shaky breath, dispelling the mist in her vision left from the rain. She leans forward, just over the edge of the building she’s crouched on, and her loose hair falls forward, silvery and synthetic and horribly tangled. Irritated, she reaches for another hair tie, and her hands falter around her wrist.

Lloyd had promised her a bracelet there. But he’d promised Kai would make the bracelet, hadn’t he, and Kai couldn’t make the bracelet if he was dead, could he.

Pixal blinks, her breath hitching. She’s been so numb to the pain of Zane’s loss, it hasn’t yet occurred to her that she’s losing Kai, too. And Jay, and Cole, and—

She sucks in the same shuddery kind of breath she’s seen Lloyd do, and carefully fists her hand in the area of her uniform above her chest. Her fingers dig in tightly, clutching in a hopeless attempt to feel some sort of comfort she knows she’ll never find.

But perhaps, for these few seconds, she can pretend the action is holding her together.

************

“It was inevitable,” Pixal tells Lloyd blankly, as he rasps out his third apology in the dark cover of their small hideout. “That one of us would fall, eventually. It had nothing to do with you.”

Lloyd swallows thickly. “It could’ve — it should’ve been—”

He doesn’t finish, but he doesn’t need to. Pixal’s hand shoots out, clamping tightly around his wrist, and there’s a beat of gratitude that she doesn’t need to rely on her voice alone anymore.

“Don’t.” Her voice is strung tighter than the tension in their shoulders. “You cannot change anything. You can’t, Lloyd, and you should not wish to — to change it that way.”

Lloyd jerks his hand free, wiping miserably at his eyes. He sets it back down within her reach, though, and if Pixal were any different, she’d take it.

But Pixal isn’t that different from Lloyd at all in the end, and neither of them reach for the other’s hand, no matter how desperately they crave the contact. Fear is more familiar, and it’s easier to give into it than it is the clawing need for comfort in your chest, after all.

“Still,” Lloyd finally whispers. “Still.”

Pixal swallows. She doesn’t disagree. If one of them had to fall, she knows she gladly would have taken it upon herself. She knows the others care for her, certainly, but she also knows her place in the grand scheme of things. They were six before she came along, and even now she’s kept far too many secrets to be fully counted among them.

She listens to Lloyd’s quiet, cracked voice, and she wonders if he’s thinking that they were five before he came along, younger than Pixal got to know him as.

Now they’re three, hollow and heartbroken. Though counting herself as one whole feels like cheating, right now.

Pixal squeezes her eyes shut, and wonders what it’s like to cry. Perhaps it helps, though Lloyd doesn’t look any less miserable.

************

“I was thinking,” Lloyd tells her, during one of the precious few quiet moments they have while trying to overthrow Garmadon and Harumi. Pixal’s turning the tiny tea flower he’d given her over in her hands, a part of her mind already marking articles about flower-pressing, another part wondering if it’s already too late to save the blossom. “About that promise we made, before all this.”

Pixal finally tucks the flower into the pocket of her uniform, pressed close to her chest. If anything, it can be a reminder of the lives that are safe — the life that’s coming back to her, if she has to drag him back from another realm herself. “And?”

Lloyd’s hands twist together. “Maybe we should focus more on staying alive.”

Pixal coughs out a laugh, breathless and startled. Lloyd wrinkles his nose at her, but his eyes are amused, even with their light lost. “I mean, the emphasis would be on keeping everyone else alive, but it’s kinda hard to do that if we’re dead, so…yeah. Priorities.”

“Staying alive should always be a priority,” Pixal corrects him, but she tugs the edge of his armor out of place with a smile.

“Why didn’t you teach me how to graffiti?” she nods at the designs on the green leather. “Or was this another Darkley’s tradition.”

“This is a refined art, called whatever I had on me that showed up on dark green,” Lloyd grumbles, fixing his armor. “I’ll teach it to you when we get out of this.”

“Another reason why staying alive would be a more productive focus,” Pixal points out. “I’ve heard teaching is easier when you’re alive.”

“And I’ve heard you’re a real riot,” Lloyd mutters. “It’s a promise, okay? I promise to teach you how to do cool armor design if you promise not to disappear into another realm on me.”

Pixal nods, adjusting her own armor tighter as screams ring out from a street nearby. “A promise, then.”

She keeps both the promise and the flower, the tiny blossom dried and faded by the time she’s escaped from the prison, heart racing with leftover adrenaline as Zane sweeps her into his arms. She clutches back every bit as tight, listening to his breathless laughter as cheers rise from the streets behind them, the smoke drifting across the early morning sky above them pale against the lightening blue. Pixal buries her face in his shoulder and breathes, tucking the moment away in her heart where it won’t fade. There’s a future stretching out before her, and she’s got the limbs to walk her path on her own, but all she wants right now is the steady ground beneath her feet and the bright laughter of what she’s managed to keep.

Lloyd meets them shortly after, his own promise kept as he tears his gaze from his father, handing him off to the authorities before sprinting for the others. Pixal barely snags a moment alone with him, and even then no one’s particularly keen on letting him out of their sights.

He meets her eyes as they pick their way through the wrecked streets, the city more alive around them than it’s been in weeks. In the dark of the early morning, Pixal’s eyes glow a bright green, reflecting oddly in the windows they pass. It’s always been her preferred color, in contrast to Zane’s bright blue. Lloyd glances at her, his own eerily green eyes glowing back. He bites his lip, but it’s to hold back real laughter this time.

“My eyes were green first,” she tells him.

“Sue me,” he shoots back, before Kai’s throwing an arm over his shoulders again, tucking Lloyd neatly in between him and Nya. Pixal smothers a laugh at the look on his face, and tightens her own arm further where it’s linked firmly in Zane’s.

It’s going to be an easy promise to keep, she thinks.

#lego ninjago #ninjago #lloyd garmadon #ninjago lloyd #pixal #there was a point to this but it got lost in pix and lloyd do arts and crafts #either way i'd die for both these characters #ninjago where is the pixal love i miss her #my fic

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a-dusty-individual · 8 months ago

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Fuck it, here is the pros and cons to each game. This is all subjective, I do personally believe everything I am saying and know others who agree with me, too. The opinions of a complete stranger probably don't matter all that much, but I do want you to have a good time and enjoy yourself playing fallout. This is also pretty long, so I'm gonna put it below the cut.

Fallout 1 and 2

I put em together cause the pros and cons pretty much apply to both, and you should really play through 1 and then 2 for the best experience.

Pros

Where it all started

Written beautifully, moral choices especially are written great (given how 3 handles em this is pretty big)

Very fun turn based combat (based on gurps im pretty sure)

Exploration is fun and flows nicely

The characters, the voicing, the writing, the animations. All incredible.

Building your character feels meaningful since you get options to do certain things with different skills.

Both are set in the western USA, so there are links to FNV that the others don't really have.

Cons

Obviously, the games are very graphically outdated. Tbf to them they are almost 30 years old.

If you aren't used to games with the afformention turn based combat, I don't recommend starting here. They aren't very forgiving (as in my first time playing both, I died in the starting area multiple times.

Fallout 3

Pros (I fucking hate fallout 3 so much so this is hard for me)

There are occasionally some good bits in the story. I won't say any more so as not to spoil them.

Playing 3 will make a lot of 4 make more sense since 3 and 4 are the only games on the East Coast. Certain characters and concepts that appear in both for example.

Cons (thank god now, I can shit talk 3)

The game starts so fucking slowly. The intro is god-awful and honestly almost made me give up playing because I got really bored. It has also made me not want to play again because I know it's there.

The story is really not very well written at all. Again, I am not going to elaborate on that much because I dont want to spoil anything for you. But just know there are some decent sized plot holes, and the story really struggled to make me care about what i was doing and why. It is also very linear. You are just following a path the whole way.

Moral choices are shallow as hell. All of them boil down to "am i playing as a mass murdering psychopath or am I... not doing that." The game world also doesn't really react to these choices.

The gameplay gets really easy after a bit since the game is designed so that you can go anywhere right as you leave the vault. So the fame doesn't feel like it has a sense of increasing challenge. The raiders you fight are always the exact same difficulty.

Your character build outside of combat feels pointless since everything is just percentage based, so you can just save-scum speech options instead of worrying about building an actual character.

I am assuming since you mentioned playing 1 and 2 that you are on PC. So this game requires a PHD in computer science, and you must have at least 1000 years of tech-wizard training under your belt in order to get it to function properly on anything later than Windows 7.

Fallout: New Vegas (again)

Pros

Cmon, you already know this game is fantastic, frankly one of the best ever made.

You get to play again with a different faction or a different build or take a different companion around with you.

Motherfucking Robot Dog

Cons

You can't romance companions, which frankly is bullshit.

It isn't really something new for you. It could be worth going to a different game to get some new insight first.

Fallout 4

Pros

Obviously it is graphically the best

The weapon, armour, and power armour customization is wonderful.

Can finally romance companions.

Speaking of the companions are all great and have very nice storylines of their own.

It's a lot easier to mod than the rest (if that is your kinda thing, personally i love modding games, but tis up to you)

Has the same bonus new vegas does with having multiple factions to pick from.

Voiced player characters. Some people don't like this, but I do. Mostly because the voice actors did a fantastic job, and the same goes for the rest of the game's voice work

Cons

Has the same issue of a slow start and intro that 3 has. It isn't as long, and imo isn't as boring, but you still aren't right into the game like you are with 1, 2, and New Vegas.

The base-building. I'm just not a huge fan of it. Beyond the quests that require you to do it, I rarely touch it.

I don't like the radio host, especially compared to the smooth mf that is Mr Neeeewww Vegas and even Fo3's 3-Dog

They did the BoS diiirty.

Alright. I believe that is everything. Enjoy your time in whichever part of the wasteland you choose next friend.

#also i see your tag about 76 #it was pretty shit at launch ill admit #but now #it is really not as bad as people say it is #its just not a fallout game in the same way #its fallout if fallout was an MMO survival shooter.#which isnt terrible but it just isnt what anyone expected or wanted #i personally enjoyed it when i played it with my old friends

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calehenituseappreciation · 4 years ago

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i hc wilbur made tommy president because he planned to go and press the button while tommy spoke and kill him along with himself

wilbur wanted end all his unfinished symphonies and as the person who raised tommy- he raised him like he raised l'manberg. he doesnt care for fundy- not since he denounced him- so he wanted to end him :)

i need a fic where tommy is the one who goes to stop wilbur and wilbur fucking stabs him before pressing the button saying "it was never meant to be" tommy loses both first and last lives to that phrase

tommys last words are it was always meant to be fucking wilbur survives the explosion and has no one to kill him and now he has to live with the consqunces tommy becomes toast- short for ghost tommy i refuse to write so many letters each time- and immeditly looks for his older brothers and he finds wilbur first :) wilbur is exiled for his crimes and also out of fear- they tried to rehabilate him! they really did but then he freaked out over seeing toast... in a bad way.... and he and toast burned georges house on toast suggest (maybe we should burn something! that always helps me calm down!) this is after wilbur is trusted enough to be not... in a prison... after phil convinced them he needs help and toast tries his best ok- (WHO LEFT WILBUR WITH TOAST!) (I THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIME! I WAS ONLY LEAVING FOR FIVE MINUTES! AND RANBOO WAS THERE TOO!) and toast tries to go with but everyone is like "yeah no" and toast is like "whhhhyyy i just wanna stay with wilby!" and everytime anyone tries to tell tommy about the wrongs that have happened to him he screams and clutches his head in pain and everytime he comes back he doesnt remember the convo toast,,, is the most BABY toast calls everyone cutesy nicknames unironcially he calls eret rere toast, chriping happily: TECHIE!!!! tubbo: TOMMY STAY AWAY FROM HIM! toast, in a very lost and confused voice: why? techno, freaking out: tommy? toast: hi!!!!!!! im toast!!!!!! :D techno: lowkey ab to cry toast: NOOOOOOOO DUN CRI! toast: there there techie... i know what will help! tubbo, sighing: arson? toast: ARSON! phil comes just in time to find tommys dead body and l'manberg gone hes not around for the withers neither hes there just to see the crater and wilbur in chains with blood on his hands trying to off himself phil will forever blame himself for not making it in time :> dream: taking wilbur away in boat toast, floating behind the boat: o^o dream do you have any games on your phone .///^///. looks at exileinnit hmmm spins roulette wheel who should i hurt... i picked d all of the above they dont let toast go with him but because he is baby and you can't tell him what to do tubbo: sighs finally now that the exiles done toast can you- tubbo: looks up tubbo: GOADDAMN IT

toast is promptly kidnapped back to l'manberg the next day toast keeps going back tho and no one understands why- he literally killed him! why does he keep wanting to go back! (toasts unfinished buisness keeping him tied was helping wilbur and l'manberg- he loved wilbur even at his worst)

toast vibes around everyone but he stays with wilbur- where ever wilbur goes is where he builds his home

its shitty but its an 'ome Toast, teary eyed: Dad? Why does everyone hate Wilby? Why can't I be with him... Phil, with no idea what to do: niki bakes cakes with niki whenever hes in l'manberg he keeps accidently setting her bakery on fire but hes sMOL AND GIGGLES A LOT AND HE HAS FLOUR ON HE GODDAMN SELF toast is a part of mexican l'manberg i dont make the rules mexican dream: AYYYYYYYYY HOMIE toast, giggling: 'OMIE!!!!!

Toast is wholesome while everyone is literally willing to murder Wilbur while also trying to stop him from khs toast is just a very happy lovely child and cries whenever anyone is mean to 'his big brother wilby!' and so they all constantly glare daggers over toasts shoulder wherenever he cant see em meanwhile Phil is just dying inside because Tommy is a ghost by Wilbur's hands and Wilbur keeps trying to commit suicide and oh god what is he supposed to do- he simply avoids this struggle by avoiding them toast, waddling up to philza: papa do you have any games on your phone? all im saying is that tommy called phil papa before changing to dad or fathercraft phil,in the tired parent voice: tommy please sit down- just for five minutes- at least for 5 minutes toast: sits down and then proceeds to struggle to continue to sit but he must because dad told him to toast is just ADHD incarnate wilbur, trying to end himself: im gonna escape my consequences toast: HI!!!!! :D wilbur: FUCK ITS MY CONSEQUENCES toast,,,, is so baby Wilbur is just not allowed to have anything remotely sharp i like how theres so much angst and im just hyper focusing on ba yby dream uses toast the same way he uses ghostbur! :D toast doesnt realize of course even after wilbur tells him dream is bad but he keeps forgetting!!! Everyone: da baby Dream: how can I profit from this oh dream is manipulating wilbur btw wilbur: suffering toast: i made you a card toast trusts eret wholeheartedly and this hurts eret because she knows if toast remembered he probably wouldnt- they wanted redemption but not like this- not because of death Toast: you look cool Toast: you are friend now Eret: sobs I don't deserve this Toast: what did I do wrong Toast: how can I help friend!!!!! Eret: sobbing more toast looks at everyone says "ah! friend shaped!" if ur wondering wheres the angst toast is the angst- toast is just tommy without any bad memories and hes so different they thought he was happy before they thought he was fine tommy was hurt too but since he internalized it no one cared toast sees wilbur being sad and goes! i know what will help! n-not arson tho people dont like arson when you do it.... BUT ITS OKAY! I BROUGHT A FRIEND! shows friend, the sheep and wilbur just fucking sobs Toast is wholesome chaotic in a perfect mix- toast is tommy but without the 'asshole on purpose as a self defense mechanism" someone mentioned something about Tommy masking insecurities once Toast doesn't remember. and he's fine with that he doesn't have any insecurities toast hurts because in retrospect toast, meeting bad: WOAAAAAAH! YOU LOOK SO FUCKING COOL! bad: LANGUAGE! toast, cringing back, looking at the ground: ..sorry :( bad: ...you can swear toast: :D bad: once toast hasnt sworn since "hes saving it for special occasions" sometimes he accidently swears and immedtly gasps and looks at bad and bad just sighs and is like "its okay it was an accident" bad never would have thought itd take letting tommy swear for him to stop huh... its almost like... hes a child.... and the negetive reienforcement.... was doing more harm then good.... toast: exists in an amount of happiness no one has ever seen him in before everyone: pain how much pain was tommy in before? they thought tommy was happy- was... was he not happy? he's so unabashedly joyful and energetic looking back they can see how forced every laugh felt, every smile- He's not afraid to just talk to people, make new friends he became so much more cautious after Eret, had it really effected him that badly? He's open. He never lies about how he's feeling, never brushes anything away how much was Tommy hiding, how much pain, how much fear- It's chilling. bone chilling. There's no way to fix what's been lost. No way to apologize to who Tommy used to be, to try and make it better. None of them every bothered to see him as anything more than a nuisance, an annoying child or cannon fodder and they'll regret it for the rest of their lives everyone: having a mental crisis toast: GUYYYYSS!! I MADE ANOTHER FRIEND!!!

"Wilby?" Wilbur heard Tommys voice say in an innocent tone.

Was he hearing things? Tommy's dead. He killed him himself.

"Wilby why are you in prison?" The image of his little brother asked, "Did you commit arson without me?" it asked in a pout.

"TOMMY!" Tubbo yelled running into the cell where Wilbur was kept, going through the bars with ease, "Tommy get away from him!"

"But 'ubbo!!!! Wilby is 'ere!!!!" Tommy (?) said with a smile Wilbur hadn't seen since Tommy was a child.

"Tommy, I understand you don't remember anything right now but you need to come back over here!" Tubbo demanded and Tommy flinched

Wilbur was struck with the sudden realization that this isn't just his mind- no no it can't be- but Tubbo acknowledged him he has to- Wilbur reached his locked hands towards Tommy only for him to pass through him. What? No no it was just his imagination that makes sense.

"Oh sorry Wil! I'm kinda dead! I don't remember how i died... but i think im a ghostie!" Tommy said plainly, floating off the floor. Wilbur looked at him in confusion. Whats happening?

the first time toast sees the crater toast srceams in intense amount of pain- its so loud you can hear it all over the smp- and just dissapears for a few days before reappearing with no memories of what happened toast saying things tommy thought but never said- he calls eret "big brother" and eret fucking d i e s toast cals all the l'manbergians older siblings He's far too honest for anyone to handle tommy was always honest too but he learned from experince that honesty only lead to hurt Tommy was like an enderchest, you could never see beyond the exterior, everything inside was exclusive to him and him alone Toast is like when someone dies and all their fuckin items explode onto the ground. you just see everything and most of it was pain and everyone feels bad because they thought he was the only one uneffected that nothing had ever put a damper on his happiness and energetic smile- at what point had that smile became fake? also for angst reasons the last memory toast has is before the elections toast has uwu boy vibes but more chaotic toast goes to dream smp from logstedshire purely for sam nook toast starts making his hotel since he sees nobody has a home (including dream LMAO) (and he wants to make a safe place since everyone keeps saying something about war) and wants to make one and asks sam for help since apparently hes good at building and sam lets him pay after he finishs the hotel and sam nook is there since day one because i dont think i could handle a world without sam nook toast: biting everyone tubbo: wHY DO YOU DO THAT?????? toast: once techie bit all the cupcakes and then said it was his cuz he bit it so im biting everyone to show their mine!!!!! tubbo: i- tubbo: i am both flattered and disgusted everyone, remembering how tommy used to bite everyone upon meeting and then everyone would get mad at him and yell at him until he stopped biting people on meeting: sadly whips and nae naes hes a BABY toast deserves the fucking world also i havent talked ab it but there is wilbur and fundy angst here fundy confronts wilbur also not that fundy is angry about not not not getting murdered by his father but also why does he consider tommy his unfinished sympohny and not him? he raised fundy too- maybe he just only ever loved tommy (based off his insecurity of how close wilbur and tommy are based off wilbur raising tommy and wilbur only being there for fundy by the time he was older and also using hybrid age go nyoom for this dream manipulates toast during wilburs exile along with wilbur and toast realizes both of them were being used by him and fucking screams lourder than he ever has before and dissapears for a week and then shows up at technos house (he got lost and he didnt know why he was at logsted shire- he doesnt remember the place) on the day of the excution and tries to help technoblade but keeps forgetting that everyone is trying to kill techno the butcher army is hesitant when "hey why are you all attacking big brother Techy-" "HE SPAWNED WITHERS IN L'MANBERG!" "he did?" toast asked tilting his head in confusion "YES! HE DID! AFTER YOU DIED! NOW WHERE IS HE TOAST! WE NEED TO CAPTURE HIM!" whenever tubbo talks ab how theyre planning on excuting techno or how there was no trial toast has flashbacks to tubbos excution but hes never able to hold on to the memories just leaving him feeling bad toast sees anything traumatic and just makes the blue screen noise toast has to reboot every time anything truamatic happens and when he does he doesnt remember what happens after

toast hurts on a "THE FUCKING IMPLICATIONS OF THIS" level just.. everyone trying to make up for not noticing tommys hurt and trying to be good to toast when its already too late... far too late glatt is also here because whenever ytoast dissapears after something trauamtic he bounces back to the land of the dead for the bit and sometimes he drags glatt out to the land of the living with him only works bc toast has unfinished buisness so he can freely go between and just stays in the land of the lving until he can finish his unfiinshed buisness ghostbur and toast wouldve been good friends if they ever met anyone yells at toast and he immeditly starts sobbing

basically when everything is calm and peaceful and everyone is happy together after dream is in prison and toast is like "oh... this is what ive always wanted"

"toast?" tubbo asked, confused toast smiled softly, "i think its time for me to go" "what?" wilbur asked his pitch unusually high due to the fear lacing his voice "i think... i think this was my unfinished buisness... this is the last thing i wanted when i was alive, the reason i stayed... i think its finally my time to go now" toast said smiling tearfully "no! you vcan't go! we just got you back!"

basically when everything is finally ok, when things finally calm down toast fades back to the void/afterlife thing

#dream smp #wilbur soot #tommyinnit #dream smp hcs #dream smp au #dsmp

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