#what are contracts anyway amirite
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blackholebunni · 1 year ago
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hi hello its like 2 in the morning and ive decided to post this stupid deranged theory <3
so in the zim fandom theres this common trope in fanfics that i will affectionately refer to as "pak theory", where some kind of error or propoganda or some such is directly interfering with zim's ability to Be Good At His Job (invader).
so. "we apologize for the interruption" amirite. the plot of the episode is essentially zosky wants to take a break but apparently that's against the terms and conditions of this contract that he Did Not Know Existed (kaput is also part of this contract, obvs). The guy who runs up to scold them abt Taking A Break proceeds to patronizingly explain to kaput and zosky that they're cartoon characters doomed to try and fail at taking over a planet each and every time. Kaput and Zosky... don't seem to register the cartoon character part??? like at all?? they argue with the guy and then he sentences them to "cartoon hard labour" but i am mostly focused on the fact that a: kaput and zosky are apparantly part of a contract they do not remember ever signing; and b: they do not react to the cartoon character thing AT ALL. i would argue they literally did not or /could not/ register.
anyways. what do you think would happen if that contract, which sounds kind of illegal, where to be destroyed or render null and void. because i think abt that a lot
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suga-kookiemonster · 2 years ago
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ASHLEY I AM CLUTCHING MY PEARLLSSSSS!!! 😭😭😭🤭🤭 Like turn up the AC it’s hot in here. Ngl ocs “choo choo” had me dying shes so real for that!
Okay not to get deep or anything but I do feel like Seokjin envies Taehyung a bit, hence the constant bickering between these two. I think Seokjin wishes he was more carefree, spontaneous and basically more freedom to just do shit the way Taehyung does. I’m guessing as the youngest Tae probably had more attention, spoiled, getting whatever he wants while Seokjin bared the consequences of being the oldest. Cause I definitely peeped a bit of jealousy from him in this chapter.
Also, I’m team Seokjin but he got me a bit annoyed towards the end because why aren’t you cuddling with oc rn??!!? 😭😭 hes the only who doesn’t cuddle with her after their session and I know it’s the agreement they have damn live love laugh a lil mr ceo 😭
Anyways, you outdid yourself with this chapter Ashley. It was definitely worth the wait. Thank you
i touched on it in the chapter, but seokjin and taehyung actually envy each other! seokjin got the full brunt of their father's attention (a blessing and a curse), but that means that he was always held to a different standard. he got all the responsibility and no freedom. tae, on the other hand, was allowed to do pretty much whatever he wanted (within reason), but he wasn't deemed "important" enough to receive much attention. jin is also often irritated by tae because tae's antics sometimes make his own job harder (ex: the whole reason oc got contracted in the first place). naturally, this causes tension between the two, but they still love each other at the end of the day. family, amirite? 🤣
and LOL at your seokjin cuddling frustration 😂 the man is booked and busy, okay? he got places to be and we all know what this is 😂😂
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thatiranianphantom · 2 years ago
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Mads, Lili, KJ, Casey and Vanessa are filming together and guess who is nowhere to be found Cole but yeah Lili can be filming with him even group scenes. The embarassment. BA and JT will serve in high school erasing BH forever
Well, obviously, that's the only explanation! Obviously! Damn, I'm going to miss group scenes but if you say it anon, clearly it's confirmed.
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smute · 3 years ago
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i have a feeling im about to start a fight with my boss and even though im dreading the chain of emails thats about to hit me im also proud of myself for finally learning to say no
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gogolstoelicker · 3 years ago
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Hello love <3. Can I request Nikolai Gogol MC? Love u so much
Riddle, Azul & Vil with a Gogol!MC
note: I LOVE GOGOL SO MUCH CAN U TELL😍😍 WHEN I FIRST SAW HIM, I JUST FELL HEAD OVER HEELS, GIGGLING AND BLUSHING AND KICKING MY LEGS WHENEVER HE APPEARED
side note:why is writing his description kind of hard
You're sadistic and love to speak in great theatrics, having the tendency to pose questions as "quizzes". Those quizzes are oftentimes rhetorical threats. When fighting, you expressed great joy in fighting and tormenting your opponents.
You had hinted that your eccentric persona may or may not be real. That the side of you feels no remorse when doing evil acts is just as real as your other side that is feeling guilty, claiming to want to soar as free as birds do.
Riddle:
Azul:
the worse at tolerating you
everytime u appear, he cried a little on the inside and just silently wished for u to leave him alone and leave
its like u can read his mind bc u started making quizzes abt the exact same thing he's feeling
and honestly? u probably saw all of his rules and scheduled life to be quite dull
you're a free soul, seeing them bounded to rules probably got the gears in ur head moving
so guess who's the little devil going around in heartslabyul telling students to break the rules or make at least one student to break the rules once a day?🤗🤗🤗
cater and trey trying to stop u because they don't want to die:😫😫
keyword: trying. it did not work
riddle could not handle u at all
straight up tried to ban u from the dorm
probably knocked on his door at 3am to play some random board game too
he go to school the next day with eyebags bc of u
now he is determined to ban u from the dorm
well not that it can stop u anyway
enjoy the cat and mouse chase ig?
smile and nod yall, just smile and nod
well he dealt with floyd so he can tolerate u here and there
but if u do smth like accidentally chased his customer away from ur pranks? oh he's coming for that ass
u prolly don't like his contracts💀since it's kind of bounding someone to smth
stomping ur way like🤬🤬🤬
probably tried to pull him out of work with pranks too and he is SICK and TIRED of it
he just wants to work💔pls💔
he wants the money pls stop distracting him💔
probably a #1 supporter to destroying the contracts
not even to free the students, its mostly for personal reasons
ok maybe a little bit of wanting to free the students too but its mostly u wanting to destroy the contracts bc it goes against ur beliefs💀
and u won't really care usually well more like u can't do anything to everyone and force ur beliefs on them BUT
but since you're kind of involved with azul and ur friends are asking u to destroy the contracts, what can u do amirite😘😘
azul:
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Vil:
honestly? he can tolerate you better too🙏
all bc of how he's near rook most of the times that he tolerates u best
u, the menace, obviously noticed this and used it to your fullest advantage
vil is tolerating you? well he can surely tolerate THIS too🤗 *pulls vil into ur overcoat or smth idk*
vil almost flipping u when u disappeared with ur ability
him frantically checking his appearance
finds out he looks just fine🤨u and that ability of yours honestly🙄🙄
he does mind ur pranks and had asked u to tone it down but its not helping much so uh
just dont bother him and his dormmates🤨u better not accidentally ruin their appearance bc of ur prank or smth🤬
but other than that, he'll answer ur quizzes and actually listens to ur rare rant abt wanting to soar as freely as birds
probably doesn't like how scheduled his life is😭😭
writing this far finally made me realized how badly putting these three next to a gogol!mc are💀
like imagine putting someone who's goal is complete freedom with three people who's lives are bounded to their own rules or just bounded to smth in some way💀
well opposite attracts amirite⁉️
moving on, you'll be more than happy to help vil if he needs any help with special effects on stage while acting or smth
he needs someone to throw these things from up like snow for the sake of the story? u got him
with that ability of urs, you can do anything💪‼️
congrats? u two are besties? kinda?
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jakesimfromstatefarm · 4 years ago
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how to fake date your best friend | jake sim
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✰ summary: the rules were simple -
pretend to be the boyfriend of you, his best friend who wants the attention of their crush, for a week and a week only
no kissing (bc gross cooties amirite) allowed, unless needed in times of desperate measure 
and no matter what, absolutely, most definitely, do not fall in love. 
simple, right?
well apparently not. because news flash––jake's already broken one of the rules. 
and to give you a hint, it's neither rule 1 or 2.
✰ pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. members of enha!] 
✰ genre: fluff, comedy | fakingdating!au, highschool!au, bestfriend!au, friends to lovers
✰ warnings: cursing, high-schoolers doing dumb highschool things, underage drinking (pls don’t actually do any of this irl), jake being a certified simp, it’s LONG (i’m so sorry), cheesy kithes bc im a sucker for kithes ( ˘ ³˘)♥
✰ wc: a whopping 9.5k
✰ a/n: it’s finally finished :’)))))) it ended up being much longer than i wanted but i had so much fun writing the characters that i got carried away lolol anywaysss i hope you guys enjoy it,,,i got a little unmotivated during the process bc i didn’t know if it was good or not but here it is heh (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ 
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Tuesday, December 8th
Jake Sim lives a simple life. 
He likes to think he leads the normal, stereotypical life of a teenage boy. Has decent grades, plays soccer after school, skateboards around the neighborhood, has a best friend who he’s desperately in love with, and has a stable group of friends. 
Okay, maybe not so simple, because this boy would physically launch himself to the moon and drill at its surface to collect moon dust for you if you asked him to––despite his deadly fear of combusting in outer space. 
But that fear doesn’t even compare to his worst one yet: not having you in his life. 
And so, he decided to just repress any and all feelings he’s had for you ever since he discovered them in middle school, when he realized he hated seeing you go to the eighth grade dance with a date––that wasn’t him. 
He decided that he wasn’t going to risk losing a life-long friendship over some dumb, teenage boy feelings. 
They were probably powered by his testosterone anyways. Yeah, that’s totally it.
He’s totally not in love with you. 
So yes, he lives a pretty normal life. Every day is the same as the last, and tomorrow will be the same as today. But he likes it like that––he doesn’t want anything to change. 
Especially not now, when he finds himself content with every aspect of his life (okay maybe except for his history grade, god, does he hate history). 
So, it catches him off guard when you arrive at the group’s usual lunch table, located outside in your school’s courtyard, looking as excited as ever. 
Jake’s the only one at the table so far. The remaining usually showed up late––Heeseung spends his first half of lunch tutoring freshmen for community service hours (but the poor boy has no idea what he’s doing), Sunghoon is probably stuck in line in the cafeteria again (he always forgets to pack his own lunch), and Jay is...well actually, no one ever knows where Jay comes from. He’s a special one. 
It catches Jake even more off guard when you skip over any greeting a normal person would give, and start speaking at one hundred words per second. 
And that catches us up to the present.
“Y-You want me to what?” Jake’s stuttering as you stare at him with your hopeful eyes from across the lunch table. 
Despite the expression planted on your face, which screams your excitement for your “brilliant, amazing, genius, Einstein-could-never” idea (or whatever other words you used to describe it––Jake can’t exactly recall the specific terms you used, they all came out of your mouth too fast), you don’t respond to his question of bafflement. You continue to stare at him, awaiting his response. Jake could compare the look on your face right now to a puppy looking up at its owner, eagerly waiting for a treat. You know, tongue out and all. 
He swallows the lump that’s lodged in this throat (is that the sandwich he’s having, or his nerves?) and continues to give you his look of confusion laced with a nervous smile because surely, you’re joking. 
You grab what’s left of your sandwich from his hands and take your own bite. Somewhere in between you arriving at the table and now, Jake’s managed to steal the sandwich you brought today. You did make the best chicken sandwiches, in his defense. 
“Well? It’s only for the week! And I promise you, after one week, if nothing happens––if he doesn’t make a move or anything––I’ll move on from him like you’ve been telling me to.” Your words are muffled from you savoring your sandwich, or what’s left of it anyways. (Mental note to self: don’t share your lunch with Jake ever again.) 
When Jake still doesn’t respond (you’ve truly gotten this poor boy paralyzed), you find it as a sign to continue. 
“I think it’s the perfect plan. Plus, if it doesn’t work out, it’ll be like the universe is telling me to finally move on, right?” 
Wrong. 
Jake has been encouraging you to move on from your crush because well, if we’re being honest here, he selfishly wants you to himself. Even if it wasn’t romantically.
Preferably, he would kill to get to be the one who holds your hand in the hall, call you cheesy pet names, post disgustingly cute couple pics for the ‘gram––but for the sake of potentially ruining his relationship with you, he’ll just have to settle with the role of being your best friend. 
(And he’s totally fine with that! Totally. Yup.) 
But he didn’t think that you moving on would only be a mere possible outcome (that may not even happen!) from whatever this stunt is you wanna pull. 
Said stunt: Pretend to date one another and hope it catches the eye of a certain someone you have your eye on: Park Sunghoon. 
Ah yes, Park Sunghoon. The previously mentioned one who’s probably still in line waiting to get his lunch as we speak. 
Park Sunghoon, the tall, kind, intelligent, charming young boy that everyone knows. And if anyone didn’t know him, they most definitely knew of him. He wasn’t hard to miss in the halls; everything about him just radiates perfection. 
If you plucked a random high-schooler from the halls of this school and interviewed them on the Park Sunghoon, they’d say you’d be lucky enough if the quiet boy so much as sparked a conversation with you, even if it was about what last night’s chemistry homework was. 
Well if that were true, then you and the rest of the boys would be considered lottery winners. 
How that happened, how the four of you dysfunctional beings earned his friendship, the world may never know. However, Jake is fully convinced that this was the universe’s way of playing a cruel joke on him. 
For as long as Jake could remember, it’s always been just the two of you. You and Jake. Jake and you. (With the exception of Heeseung and Jay, of course, who came along in middle school) 
In fact, your earliest memory of Jake was when he peed his pants in the kindergarten during nap time. You would know, you had the privilege of sharing a sleeping mat with him that one fateful day and in result...let’s just say the smell didn’t wear off from your clothes until a week later. Five-year-old you didn’t forgive five-year-old Jake for the longest time. 
And since then, you’ve been attached by the hip. And Jake liked it like that. Jake didn’t need anyone else in his life (with the exception of Leila) if he had you. He had found his home within you, and he didn’t plan on sharing his space anytime soon. 
Nevertheless, the universe had a completely different idea for the two of you. 
Sunghoon came into the picture last year, towards the end of the school year. Despite being the new kid, he found his way into your cherished friend group and naturally, the five of you grew as close as friends could be. 
That was the problem. Jake wanted to hate Sunghoon, to despise him for being the one that you had heart eyes for, but he couldn’t. 
Not only was Sunghoon one of Jake’s closest friends, but he didn’t want to ruin the dynamic of the friend group. After you, the three chaotic boys were the next most important people in Jake’s life. 
And so, we have the typical love triangle plot that every coming-of-age movie follows. Of course, this is all unbeknownst to you––you may be intelligent and a people-person, but oh boy can you not see the heart eyes your very own best friend has for you. 
“It’ll be easier than you think, really! Look, we can even set boundaries or rules or whatever,” you propose, as if you’re trying to get him to sign a contract. 
Rules to a fake relationship? We’re not living in a Netflix romcom, are we? 
“Okay rule number 1: it’ll only be for a week and a week only, rule number 2: we don’t have to do anything too couple-ly like...” you pause to wonder for a second. 
“Like PDA or anything! You know, unless we really need to convince him,” you casually add. When he responds with radio silence and stares at you with absolute concern painted all over his face, you cough. “Jake, I’m joking.” 
Right. Of course. Obviously. 
“And of course, just try not to fall in love with me, it’ll be hard, I know,” you send a playful wink his way. 
Too late. Turns out it’s not that hard. Jake would know. 
Jake continues to stare at you in hesitation. Yeah, you’ve had your fair share of crazy ideas (that Jake always find himself agreeing to––the poor boy just can’t seem to say no to you), but fake dating you?
Jake is sure he wouldn’t be able to pull it off without slowly destroying himself. He’d just have to say no, he’s sure you can find someone else to do it for you. 
Yes, that’s it, just say no. 
Jake has to keep some of his pride in tact. 
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Jake does not say no. 
He doesn’t know what went wrong. His mind said one thing, but his words said another. 
To be fair, Jake’s actions have always been influenced by his heart, not his brain, anyways. And when it comes to you, you bet it’ll be coming from his heart. 
So here he was now, under the stare of three equally shocked and confused guys across from you and him at the lunch table, your fingers intertwined with his.
Just a few seconds ago, you had spotted the rest of the lunch bunch approaching the table, and you quickly grabbed Jake’s hand and scooted in closer to him.  
Now here you were, explaining to your friends of your sudden relationship.  
Jake is too zoned out to even physically pick up your explanation. Something along the lines of "we’ve been dating for a while but didn’t want to tell you guys yet." From the feeling of your hand clutched tightly into his and your body right up next to him, his mind was short-circuiting. 
How is he supposed to last an entire week of this if he couldn't handle innocent hand holding? Hand holding? God, what are we, back in the fifth grade?  
Two minutes into this scheme and Jake's mind has already downgraded itself to a fifth grader's.  
Jake mentally scolds himself for giving in, this was not a good idea. 
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It takes Jake approximately 12 hours to conclude that this stunt of yours may, actually, be a good idea. He knows this because approximately 12 hours after the events surrounding lunch, he receives a text from you: 
y/n [12:03AM]: thanks again for doing this for me jake
y/n [12:03AM]: ur actually the best
y/n [12:04AM]: ew ok that was cheesy but really i owe u a big one <333
Following your thread of texts is a really close up photo of you widely smiling into the camera. A smile so big, Jake’s convinced your face was probably in pain after taking that picture. 
Anyone else might’ve thought the photo looked borderline insane but because Jake’s Jake, aka a simpᵗᵐ for you, he comes to the conclusion that it’s singlehandedly the cutest thing he’s ever seen in the entire world. 
After quickly saving the selfie into his phone, Jake tells himself that maybe this won’t be a bad thing after all. I mean, anything that makes you smile like that meant it has to be a good idea, right? 
Spoken like a true simp. 
Plus, dating you––fake dating you––is pretty much the same as it was before. He already spends most of his days with you to begin with. Now, it’s just with added displays of affection. For show, obviously. Obviously. 
And look, if Jake will never get to actually be with you, then he’ll take what he can get. And if that meant fake dating you, well, he reasons that it’s better than nothing at all. 
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Wednesday, December 9th 
Jake’s playing with the rings on your right hand and you’re in the middle of dramatically telling the lunch table about the infuriating Karen you had to deal with at work the other day when Jay comes up with a grin you all know a little too well. 
“Okay that grin means one of two things: you finally grew the balls to ask out that poor girl you’ve been teasing all year or you have something planned that we won’t like,” you interrupt your story when you catch Jay’s sly expression, evoking a chuckle from Jake, who’s now found a new distraction with the bracelets perches on your wrist. 
“Excuse you, I’ll have you know that I did ask her out. It just so happens that she’s currently ‘in between boyfriends’ whatever that means. Ouch, by the way,” Jay feigns hurt from your comment by clutching the area above his heart through his shirt. Ever the drama queen. “But yes, I do have something planned. And no, it’s not a bad idea.” 
Jay squeezes his way in between Sunghoon and Heeseung from across you and begins to pull out his own lunch. Everyone’s eyes follow him as he settles in because as bad as his unknown idea may be, you’re all still curious on what this boy has to say. 
“Well are you going to elaborate or...” Heeseung speaks up for everyone after you all mentally debate one another through darting eyes on who’s going to have to bite Jay’s silent bait.
Jay then forcefully sets both hands on his table, which elicits a little jump from you as you go for a bite of your sandwich. Adorable, Jake tells himself. 
“My parents are out of town this weekend. We all know what that means...” 
Yes. We do know what that means. The four of you have seen this scenario play out many times, a little too many times for your own good. 
This meant one of Jay’s infamous house parties that he always throws whenever his parents go out of town. And because his parents are hot-shot CEOs of an important company whose name you don’t remember (it’s nothing personal, your brain can only handle so much information and this physics exam you were studying for took up 90% of your brain capacity at the moment), they’re out of town often. 
And along with Jay’s parties comes chaos. Lots of it. And that’s because...well, it’s safe to say that despite the many school-wide presentations the police officers of your school have held in the auditorium on why you shouldn’t drink underage, Jay’s parents’ liquor cabinet always seems to find itself missing many a few bottles after each party. But we don’t talk about that. Shush. 
Almost simultaneously, everyone at the table lets out a groan, much to Jay’s disappointment. 
“C’mon guys! It’s been a while since anything’s fun happened to this school, think of all the sad students in that building right now,” he extends a finger whole-ass arm and points at your school, “who are in dire need of fun and a little...” he punctuates his sentence with the hand motion of chugging down a drink, followed with a gulping sound elicited from his tongue clicking. 
You roll your eyes along with everyone else. Don’t be like Jay, kids. Listen to those police officers. 
“Jay, it’s midterm season! I have an exam on Monday and I definitely do not want to spend the nights before wasted,” you give him an apologetic look. As crazy as Jay is, you do feel bad nonetheless. The boy just wants to have fun. 
Your response is followed up with similar comments from around the table. 
“I’m helping y/n study” 
“I have an important skating performance on Sunday” 
“Uh...my hamster died?” (ok Heeseung panicked, don’t blame the guy)
Ignoring that last excuse of an excuse, Jay continues his debate nonetheless. “Just come for the sake of it! No one’s saying you have to get wasted. Pleaseeee for me?” 
Jay throws these parties so often, you’re not sure why he’s so set on making sure you’re all going to be there. Well, I guess who wouldn’t want their closest friends to be at their own party? 
That and, Jay needs to make sure his friends are there to stop him from doing anything stupid. We all know this boy has had enough embarrassing moments to last him a lifetime. 
Everyone at the table gives each other the same hesitant look. Heeseung is the first to give in, “Oh fuck it. Sure, count me in.” 
Jay’s fist pumping the air before turning to Sunghoon with the most hopeful eyes. 
Sunghoon simply sighs in return. “Alright okay, I’ll bite. But if you vomit on my shoes again, I’m out the door.” Jay’s finger is automatically drawing a cross over his heart as a promise to not ruin Sunghoon’s Nikes again. 
He then looks to you with puppy eyes. 
You, who's already staring back at Jay with a stoic look in your eyes, are stubborn and (unlike the previous weaklings) are not as easy to convince. And somehow, this began an unannounced staring contest between the two of you, a contest to see who would budge first. This isn't an uncommon occurrence between you and Jay, but the rest of the boys are still on the edges of their seats watching this duel.
Jake casually wraps an arm around your shoulder and you’re brought in close, but still undeterred from your death-stare match with the boy across from you. 
If it’s not obvious enough, Jake’s really gotten into his role of being your boyfriend, despite it only being 24 hours since he last froze at your touch. Character development, you’ll give him that. 
You almost forget he’s faking it for a quick second. And for an even quicker second, you imagine he wasn’t faking it. And you swear you feel butterflies in your stomach at that thought. 
Weird. 
You mentally shake the thought out of your head. Priorities first, aka, beating Jay in this staring contest. 
“Fuck,” you stutter when you finally blink, admitting defeat to a grinning Jay. “Okay, okay, I’ll THINK about it. I’ll let you know.” 
Not exactly the answer Jay was looking for, but he’ll take it. Better than a no. 
He turns to Jake next, knowing there’s no way Jake will turn down a party. Just like Jay, the boy loves himself a good party. 
But–
But because Jake would take your physics exam this Monday for you if you asked, because Jake would bungee jump in the Grand Canyon without a safety net below him if you asked, because Jake would fake date you to make your crush jealous for you if you asked, he doesn’t hesitate in his answer this time around: “Same as y/n, I’ll let you know.” 
Jay looks at Jake. Then back at you, who he’s still clinging onto like a koala to a tree. Then back at Jake. “You two are gross. Admittedly cute. But gross.” 
You look up at the boy next to you to see him already grinning at you. 
For the first time today, you find yourself agreeing with Jay. 
Admittedly cute. 
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Thursday, December 10th 
You are having a bad day. 
You’re having the mother of bad days. 
Not only is it midterm season, but you still have all your regular weekly assignments to finish before Friday hits. So as a natural-born procrastinator does, you stayed up all last night trying to get a good amount of work done because what’s better than cramming all your work the night before it’s due? Doing it two nights before it’s due. 
Well apparently it wasn’t such a good idea. Because now, here you were, frantically throwing on whatever articles of clothing you find nearest to you because you slept through all your alarms. 
You’re lucky enough to make it through your school’s doors right as the second bell rings, even if you did look like you just walked straight out of a zombie apocalypse. 
You’re not so lucky when you find out your first class of the day, calculus, had a pop quiz. A pop quiz on the only unit you just happened to know absolutely nothing about. 
To top things off, you forgot to pack your lunch during this morning’s frenzy, meaning you’re automatically stuck sharing with Jake.
And because his mother started making him pack his own food out of a lesson of responsibility (she said something along the lines of: “Jake, you’re about to be in college and you don’t know how to pack a decent meal”), he only has a plain PB&J sandwich and a pack of Scooby-Doo gummies in his bag today (because newsflash, he still doesn’t know how to pack a decent meal). 
Not that you could care less at the moment, you were too preoccupied with catching up on your assignments to even eat. And if any of the boys noticed your zombie-like state during lunch, they did a good job of not mentioning it. They knew better than to bother an irritated y/n. 
Somehow, you make it through the entire school day and your after-school meeting for environmental club (save the trees!) in one piece. As you finally walk out of the school building, you exhale, automatically feeling lighter. At least the hard part of your day was done. 
Now you just had to wait for Jake to finish soccer practice, which usually ended around the same time as your club, and he can drive you home, where you can continue being irritated with your day in the privacy of your own space. 
You wait on the steps of the school’s entrance, waiting for a smiley Jake to come around the corner as he usually does at 5:30pm every Thursdays. 
Yes, a smiling Jake is exactly what you needed to make your day ten times better, you conclude. 
As if on cue, you hear a ding from your phone. 
Jake [5:30PM]: ugh coach is extending practice for “team bonding” 
Jake [5:30PM]: idek what team bonding is 
Jake [5:31PM]: you ok if i cant drive you today? :// 
It’s as if the universe decided to use you as its punching bag today. 
You physically let out a distorted groan, not caring if anyone who happened to hear you thought you were a creature from out of this world, as you send him a text back.
y/n [5:32PM]: it’s all good lol have fun with tEaM bOnDiNg
Things were not all good. But no matter how upset you may be, you weren’t going to project your negative vibes onto Jake’s naturally positive ones. So you get up from the stone steps and begin your dreaded walk back home. 
It’s freezing out. You should’ve known better to just throw on a hoodie and call it a day when it’s the middle of December. But then again, you figured by now you’d be in the comfort and warmth of Jake’s car and presence...not walking home in these freezing temperatures. 
You think about Jake and how he’s probably currently suffering from not only his team bonding exercises (but really though, what are team bonding exercises?), but doing them in this weather as well. The poor boy. 
You’re quickly broken out of your thoughts by the sound of a car engine from behind you. When you don’t see it pass by you and instead hear it pull over and park next to the curb of the sidewalk you’re currently on, you automatically deduce that this is it, this is my time, I’m about to get kidnapped by whoever it is behind me but y/n, you should probably turn around and check first before you drive yourself insane in this inner dialogue. 
You turn around and squint into the front window of the car. If it were a kidnapper, this is exactly what your mother told you not to do. Her exact words were: “Run, don’t look back, and scream bloody murder.” 
Good thing it wasn’t. Just an innocent Sunghoon waving his hand at you, motioning you to get in. 
“Sunghoon?” You approach his car and stop at the passenger side’s open window. 
“y/n! It’s freezing out, I’ll drive you home c’mon,” he nods his head towards the passenger side door. 
Well, how could you say no? Sunghoon owns a nice car. Like a nice car. Like car-seat-heaters-that-make-you-feel-like-you’re-physically-melting nice. Beats getting hypothermia outside, right? 
“Why are you going home from school so late?” You ask as you settle into his car, instantly melting at the touch of the aforementioned heated seats. 
“Debate club, actually. Decided I needed another personality trait other than ice skating,” he starts the engine and begins driving towards the direction of your neighborhood. 
You laugh at his comment, you didn’t peg him as a debate kind of student. Quiet Sunghoon? Debate club? If 2 plus 2 is four...
“Hey, I don’t call you the Ice Prince for nothing! Also, don’t forget your other personality trait: forgetting your lunch every day.” 
Sunghoon quickly glances over at you to send you a dirty look (because eyes on the road, kids!), which you return with a cheeky grin. “Need I remind you that was you today?” 
“Touché,” you click your tongue. 
The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, the faint sound of Sunghoon's music in the background filling in the quietness.  
You’re humming along until Sunghoon breaks the silence, “Did Jake get stuck at practice again?” 
You don’t know why, but you swear you feel your heart beat faster at the mention of Jake’s name. No, that was always there right? Because you were with Sunghoon...your crush..obviously. Obviously. 
Ignoring the feeling, you turn your attention towards the boy driving you. 
“Oh yeah, something about team bonding. How’d you know?” 
“Eh, I just figured since he wasn’t driving you home like he always does.” He turns into your neighborhood. 
You nod at his answer. 
“You two make a good couple.” 
You whip your head at him. Did you hear him correctly?
“It was about time, really. You two have been ogling at one another for so long, Heeseung, Jay, and I almost placed bets on who would be the first to make a move.” 
He keeps his eyes on the road, casually going on about how you and Jake make the cutest couple he’s ever seen. 
You're frozen, unsure of what to think, let alone say. 
You think to two days ago, when you started this entire fake relationship because of the very boy driving you home right now. The same boy who's complimenting you on your fake relationship. The same boy who's supposed to be jealous over that said relationship. The same boy you’re supposed to be crushing over.
But now...only a mere 48 hours later, you were finding yourself okay with the fact that he was happy for you. And for the life of you, you couldn’t remember why you liked Sunghoon in the first place. Not saying he isn’t one to be crushed on, I mean, look at the guy. 
Maybe, just maybe, it had something to do with the fact that you didn't feel nervous or giddy or..anything at all when you got into the car with Sunghoon. At least, not until Jake's name was mentioned. That's when you felt the butterflies. At the mention of Jake.  
Jake. 
Weird. 
But before you can come to a conclusion on why you're feeling the way you do, Sunghoon interrupts your thoughts.  
"Well, we're here! Say hi to your parents for me," he pulls into your driveway as you're still collecting your thoughts.  
You give him a quick thanks and one last wave as you enter the front doors of your house.  
Seeing that your only solution towards confusing feelings meant distracting yourself, distract yourself you did.  
Even if it meant distracting yourself with your piling assignments.  
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The next time you look up from your work, it's suddenly way past sundown and a heavy storm has taken over. You’re surprised it hasn’t started flooding yet with the amount of rainfall you were hearing. 
You check the time on your phone, the bright 8:16PM on the screen illuminating your dimly lit room. Seeing that neither of your parents have yet to be home from work, it looks like you were going to have to settle with some instant ramen for dinner tonight.  
As you trudge down the stairs of your home, the sound of light knocking against the front door catches your attention. It's been a long day y/n, you're probably hearing things, it's definitely just the rain.
Nope. There it is again, but much louder. Much more urgent.  
You contemplate any and all potential disasters that could happen from answering the door. Only a crazy person would be willing to go out in this hurricane-like weather to be frantically knocking on your door.  
And so, you assume it has to be some psychopath trying to get into your house. Yes, there’s definitely no other logical explanation. 
You scramble around your living room, looking for the next best weapon to defend you. Resorting to the flower vase your mother keeps on the table next to the front door, you hold it out in front of you, as if you're waiting for the door to burst open.  
The knocking continues, gradually getting louder. You mentally curse at yourself for dropping out of the taekwondo class your dad signed you up for when you were younger.  
Vase in hand, you swing open the door and brace for–
"Jake? What the fuck? Get in here, you're gonna get sick!"  
You’re suddenly aware of how stupid you look, holding a light pink vase with a couple of orchids as your only form of self-defense...for it to only be your own best friend. You immediately put it back on the table as Jake quickly rushes past you and into your humble abode.  
You close the door behind you and turn to face the soaked boy.  
“I come bearing gifts, also known as take-out and hot chocolate from that one cafe you love. Also my company, if you’ll take it. I had a feeling you weren’t having the best day today,” he’s simply standing there, holding up a large brown paper bag in one hand, and a deliciously smelling cup of hot chocolate in the other, but you’re looking at him as if he bought you the Moon. 
You stare in awe at the angel of a boy in front of you, silently thanking the stars for gifting you this amazing human being as your best friend. You don’t know what you did to deserve him. 
You give him a soft smile. “Jake, you didn’t have to. It’s practically a shitstorm out there,” you cock your head towards the window, showcasing the downpour of cats and dogs outside. Jake stays by the entrance as you go down the hall and through your house’s linen closet to find a spare towel for the drenched boy.
“Nah it’s no big deal, really. Just fulfilling my duties as your loyal boyfriend,” he grins, even though you can’t see him. He likes calling himself that. Your boyfriend.
Jake continues to shake his messy hair to get the excess rain off, giving a mental apology to whoever is going to have to mop up the puddle forming on the floor due to his unannounced visit. Probably you. 
Jake hears you laugh down the hall. “You’re really invested in your role, huh? Keep this up and you might actually trick me into believing you’re my actual boyfriend.” 
Actual boyfriend? Jake likes the sound of that. Maybe he will keep this up then.
Jake doesn’t have much experience in acting, unless you count that time he played the role of Town Villager #3 in the third grade play, so he never found it as one of his interests. But playing the role of your boyfriend was one he was willing to fulfill for the rest of life, even if it was just for show. 
Jake doesn’t respond to your comment, he’s instead self-aware of his blushing cheeks, thankful that you’re too busy rummaging through your linen closet to take notice. 
“Plus, you didn’t have lunch today and I had feeling you were going to be too caught up in your work to feed yourself anything other than instant ramen,” he sets down his gifts to you on your living room’s coffee table as you come around the corner, fresh towel and new set of clothes in hand. 
His eyes fall on the familiar looking pair of sweatpants and hoodie resting on the palms of your hands. 
Hm. A little too familiar. 
Then, it clicks in his head. 
His eyes narrow at you as you giggle at his reaction, “Oh, so it takes me getting drenched in the rain for you to finally return my clothes that I’ve been missing!?” 
“Hey! I’m not returning them, simply loaning them out to a friend who’s in dire need. You basically gifted them to me the second you left them here months ago.” 
“You’re annoying.” 
“Love you too,” you toss the clothes at him and take a seat on the floor around your coffee table, prepping the table with the boxes of Chinese food Jake supplied. 
After Jake changes into the stolen dry clothes, he takes a seat next to an already-eating you at the coffee table. 
“You. are. my lord and savior Sim Jaeyun,” you’re saying with your mouth full of fried rice. You sigh from satisfaction and rest your head against Jake’s shoulder as you continue chewing. He grins as he helps himself to his own serving of fried rice and orange chicken. 
You look up at him from your spot, “How was team bonding today?” 
Jake groans in response, clearly annoyed. “Stupid. I don’t get how doing trust falls and pyramid building is going to get us any closer. If anything, I almost FELL off that pyramid today!” 
You don’t know why, but you find yourself admiring him and his soft features as he continues to rant about one of his teammates, specifically, the one who almost dropped him. 
The way his messy hair, unkept from the rain ruining it, almost covers his eyes (but you tell yourself you like it this way, it looks more natural on him), the way the corners of his lips are always perked upwards (even when he’s ranting), the way his eyes sparkle whenever he’s truly passionate about whatever he’s talking about, the way his eyes look at you like–
“Stare much? Look, I get you can’t resist my good looks but at least be subtle about it,” he smirks at you as he takes another spoon of rice. 
You break out of his trance and scoff at him. 
“You’re cute when you rant,” you nonchalantly say as you move from your spot to mirror his actions and add more rice to your plate as well.  Jake’s stills at your sudden comment, unsure of how to respond. Lucky for him, you’re distracted by the mountain of food on your plate to even notice the blushing mess of a boy next to you. 
“You know, you’re lucky you’re cute. Or else I’d deck you right here and now for ditching me after school today.” 
Anddd there goes the moment. Leave it to you to follow up a compliment with a threat of violence. 
Jake finds it cute anyways. He always finds you cute. 
Jake narrows his eyes and lightly shoves you before an apology is written all over his face. “Sorry about that by the way. I feel awful about making you walk home when it was freezing out.” 
“Nah, it’s okay. Sunghoon gave me a ride, actually. Did you know he does debate? I guess you learn something new everyday,” you ramble, unaware of the boy next to you getting tense at the sudden mention of the other’s name. 
Up until now, Jake’s completely forgotten about Sunghoon's involvement in this entire scheme. In fact, the past 48 hours with you have felt so normal, so comfortable, he almost forgot about the deal in the first place.   “You think he has any clue?” Jake suddenly asks, referring to the plan. 
You immediately know what he’s referring to, as Jake practically worded out your very own thoughts. 
You shrug. “Not a single one. We’re practically William and Kate in his eyes. But honestly, that’s the least of my worries right now. I’m too distracted by my exams right now to care.” 
Jake feels guilty for being satisfied with your answer. He’s 100% sure that if convincing Sunghoon took you two an entire lifetime of fake dating, he’d be all too willing to do it. 
“Go to Jay’s party with me tomorrow,” he abruptly says, catching your attention as your mouth is stuffed. Cute. 
He pokes your cheek. “It’ll get your mind off of work and plus, what’s more convincing than showing up to a party with your amazing boyfriend?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you. Jake doesn’t know where he gets his sudden surge of confidence. But he does know he loves calling himself your boyfriend...even if it’s for the time being. 
Rolling your eyes and swatting his poking fingers away from your face, you ponder on his suggestion. 
“You mean my annoying boyfriend,” you stick your tongue out at him. Jake takes a mental picture and hopes it never leaves his mind. 
“But I guess you could be right. Maybe I can clear my head for the night before I study my ass off all weekend.” 
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Friday, December 11th 
The party does not clear your mind. 
If anything, it gives you enough headaches to last you at least until the end of high-school. 
You come to this revelation as you and Jake approach Jay’s home, a luxurious mansion sitting at the end of a cul-de-sac, lined with similarly luxurious palaces, located in an equally luxurious neighborhood. 
You come to this revelation when you can already feel the pounding bass of music as you walk up Jay’s driveway. 
You come to this revelation when, not even two seconds after entering Jay’s front doors––
“You’re here!” A buzzed Jay shouts at the two of you, causing the both of you to contemplate your past choices that brought you here today. Jay definitely isn’t straight up drunk yet, but Jake still makes a mental note to keep an eye on him tonight. Just in case. 
The blonde-haired boy is quick to hand over two red solo cups of god knows what, to which you and Jake immediately put down on the nearest table after Jay walks away to greet the next incoming guests (you know, to not hurt his feelings). 
You and Jake are lucky enough to have been around Jay and his parties long enough to know that going all out at these parties will not be pretty the next morning.
You cringe at the memory of last year, when you had to suffer from possibly the worst hangover of all hangovers after one of Jay’s parties. Jake will never let you forget how miserable you looked the next morning. His camera roll’s album titled “y/n blackmail pics” can vouch for that.
“Remind me again to never listen to you,” you almost have to shout at Jake over the thumping music. Jake laughs at your comment and tugs at your hand as he begins entering the house.
The two of you do your rounds of greetings to the people you know...and random underclassmen who you swear you have never seen before but somehow made it to this party. You’ve always questioned how Jay’s invite list worked. Maybe there isn’t one. That would explain how it looked like someone announced Jay was giving out free Teslas and the entire school got hold of the news. 
“Thank god you guys are here,” you hear a voice come from behind the two of you as you guys leave the main room to enter the house’s smaller, but just as luxurious looking, den. You turn to see Heeseung with Sunghoon following closely behind, trying his best not to get swept away in the crowd of people. 
The den is where you usually stayed during these parties. It’s not like there are rules of where people are allowed to party, by any means, but it’s like how a high-school’s cafeteria worked. There’s a mutual silent agreement of where everyone goes, and the den is where the party host and his friends went.  
“Okay, is it just me, or is tonight’s party just a little...too..much?” Sunghoon asks as the four of you take your seats on the main couch of the room. Jake’s quick to make space for you next to him as you go to sit, but to his surprise, you find your home right on his lap. 
“You said be convincing right?” you say into his ear as you settle yourself. Right. That’s totally why. Because you had to go along with the ruse. Obviously. 
You shift a bit so you’re more facing sideways, not blocking off Jake’s line of vision as the boy himself is..well, calling him a rag doll might be excessive. 
But he’s sure he looks like one right now, having lost all senses in his limbs, leaving him frozen underneath you. 
Jake Sim is the epitome of politeness. He was raised in a family that taught him how to respectfully greet others, how to always offer food to others before eating it himself, how to properly treat a significant other. As a result, Jake grew up to be one of the sweetest, kindest, purest people to ever walk this earth. 
(Relatively speaking, the earth is large, but so is Jake’s heart.) 
But human-beings aren’t perfect, they must have a balance. A balance of pros and cons. 
Sure, he can’t pack his own lunch and sometimes forgets to water the little succulent you gifted him that’s currently seated on his window sill. Sure, sometimes he’s too sweet for his own good, you know, like willing-to-be-your-fake-boyfriend too sweet. But aside from the minor details, Jake Sim doesn’t have many cons, no. 
But he sure can be awkward. 
And so because Jake Sim is sweet, kind, pure, and awkward, he is unsure of what to do with himself when you’re seated right on top of him. 
As if you could read his befuddled mind, you take his arm that’s resting behind you to wrap around your waist as your support as you throw one of your arms around his shoulder. And throughout this entire adjustment, his widened eyes are staring right at you. 
Bless this pure, pure boy. 
Also bless the position you’re in, blocking the two other boys from directly seeing Jake’s face. Because if they were to catch glimpse of Jake’s expression right now, your cover might be blown, just like that. You’re lucky Heeseung and Sunghoon are distracted by another classmate who came up to them. 
“Relax,” you sweetly laugh, cupping his chin with your free hand and lightly squeezing his cheeks. “You’re so adorably awkward.” 
Jake pouts at you. “I am not awkward!” 
“Right, and I’m totally dating you for real,” you playfully whisper at him, eliciting a poke at your waist in response. 
Twenty minutes of people-watching-aka-“who do you think is gonna pass out first?”-from-your-spot-on-the-couch later, the four of you draw your attention to the rowdy party host you all have the honor of calling your friend––aka Jay––dancing (that is, if you call wildly swinging your limbs in all four directions dancing) in the middle of the den. 
"Oh god, look at him," Sunghoon voices from besides you.
Heeseung's already filming the moment on his phone. Ah yes, technology. The best thing to ever happen to drunk teens' friends.  
"He's so wasted," you throw your head back as you let out a laugh. “We should help the kid out.” 
Poor Jay. He's not gonna hear the end of it after tonight.
"I don't know why he thinks these parties are such a good idea when he knows how trashed he's gonna be when he wakes up," Jake says, his hand naturally squeezing your waist as you giggle at his comment. "And how trashed the house will be."  
Jay slumbers over to where the four of you are seated, and abruptly stops right in front of the couch.
"My best friends!" Jay happily cheers. “Having fun?” 
“Watching you? Always,” you say to the boy who’s squeezing into a seat between you and Sunghoon, as if the small couch wasn’t already suffocating enough (and that’s with you on Jake’s lap). 
“But for real though, you should probably lay off the drinks for now,” Heeseung insists. “For all our sakes.” 
Sunghoon nods along and grabs the cup Jay’s currently nursing and sets it down where it’s out of Jay’s reach, much to his dismay. But the disappointment quickly leaves the dazed boy’s head, as his attention is now directed towards you and Jake. 
“Well if it isn’t mom and dad,” Jay turns to face you and Jake, certainly amused by your seating arrangement. 
“You know–” Jay points a finger at the two of you. “For a couple that’s certainly close, I haven’t seen you two kiss.” 
Jake is immediately coughing, certainly not expecting that to come out of his friend’s mouth. 
“Okay and your point is?” Jake frowns at Jay. If Jay wasn’t tipsy, Jake would’ve smacked the back of his head by now. 
“I’m just saying...” the blonde responds, both hands up in the air as if Jake is accusing him of something, when in was, in fact, the opposite. “But nevermind, Jakey boy here is probably too innocent for such nonsense anyways.” 
Yes, it’s confirmed. Once Jay sobers up tomorrow, Jake is driving over to his house (even though it’s a good ten minute drive from his own) just to smack him. 
“What do you mean I’m too–” 
Jake doesn’t finish his sentence. In fact, Jake doesn’t even remember what he was going to say. 
Jake doesn’t think nor feel anything else other than your lips planted on his. 
You’re pulling him in close, your hands cupping his face as his own are twitching on your waist, his mind flustered. You move your hands from his face to his neck, to which Jake immediately relaxes at. 
Sure, you two are in the middle of a dumb high-school party, one filled with pounding music and shouting teenagers, but right now, in this moment, Jake can only feel you. And he doesn’t want the feeling to ever stop. 
When you part, Jake’s eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips, his own parted in shock. He thinks he might pass out right here and now. He thinks his heart might explode right here and now. He thinks he might lov-
“Happy?” you turn to a satisfied Jay, ignoring the looks of amusement from Heesung and Sunghoon besides him. 
“Well,” you pat Jake’s leg as you get up from your spot. “I’m gonna get us some drinks. Punch only, of course.” 
Jake’s eyes are on you as you walk away, his face tinted pink from the adrenaline of it all, his heart racing. 
Jake thinks back to three days ago, when he told himself that this idea of yours was going to be all fine. After all, it was only going to be for one week. Afterwards, he can move on with his life as if nothing happened. 
But fast forward 72 hours later, 72 hours after you and Jake started this act, 72 hours after Jake told himself it’ll be all fine, Jake knows he was poorly mistaken.
Because 72 hours later, in the middle of a party that reeked of the combined smell of alcohol and sweat, Jake knows one thing and one thing for sure.
He never wants to move on from the feeling of being with you. He never wants to move on from this.
From you. 
He’s screwed. 
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Saturday, December 12th 
When Jake wakes up, much later than he intended to, on Saturday morning, the first sensation he feels are his tingling lips, still in disbelief that they graced your own last night. 
The second sensation being his pounding mind––it’s running through ten million thoughts at a time, telling him no last night wasn’t a dream. 
Third: his heart beating so fast at the thought of you, he thinks he might beat out of his chest.
And fourth, a buzzing noise. 
Jake blindly flounders his arm to the table beside him in hopes of finding the origin of the annoying sound, aka, his phone. 
After knocking down multiple miscellaneous items on his nightstand (he makes a mental note to clean his room later), he successfully retrieves the item of search. 
Jake squints at the bright screen, mind still cloudy from a mix of 1) being half-asleep, and 2) still processing what happened the night before. 
y/n [11:10AM]: r u awake yet? 
y/n [11:22AM]: imma take that as a no
y/n [11:35AM]: lemme know when ur up 
jake [11:44AM]: just woke up sorry 
jake [11:44AM]: are you okay? what’s up
y/n [11:45AM]: r u busy? 
y/n [11:45AM]: kinda wanted to talk abt smth
jake [11:45AM]: uh well no im still in bed lmao
y/n [11:46AM]: cool im outside your door 
Jake’s eyes widen as he processes your last few texts. 
Talk? Outside his door? 
Jake’s heart is nervously pounding as jumps out of bed and quickly puts on the first plaid flannel he finds. He scrambles to his mirror and gives his reflection a quick run-down. 
He’s sporting your his favorite hoodie underneath the flannel that’s long overdue a wash and his tousled hair has seen better days, but he couldn't care less. 
Before his mind can catch up to his actions, he’s rushing down the stairs, skipping two at a time and to this front door. Because he didn’t want to keep you waiting? Because he was too excited to see you? Maybe a mix of both. Definitely more of the latter, however. 
He quickly runs a hand through his hair to try to fix it up as much as he can, to no avail, before opening the door to reveal you, sitting on the steps of his front porch. 
“y/n,” he’s breathing heavily as you turn to greet him with your sweet smile he didn’t even realize he was missing. Is it possible to miss someone overnight? Jake concludes yes, it definitely is. 
“Did you run down here or something?,” you question his out-of-breath state, a teasing tone laces the tip of your tongue. 
“Or something,” Jake mutters as he closes the front door behind him to join you on the steps when you make no sign of moving. “Have you been out here all morning?” 
“Not allll morning. I had a feeling you’d sleep in so I came around the time I first texted you. Would’ve knocked but didn’t wanna bother your family,” you hum, keeping your eyes trained on the peaceful scenery around you. 
You’ve always loved Jake’s neighborhood, it brought you a sense of peace, a sense of home. 
Or was that because it reminded you of Jake? 
“You could never be a bother,” he quickly rebuttals as he takes his seat next to you on the steps. 
You respond with a soft smile before turning your attention back to anything other than the boy next to you. Your mind seems to be lost in its own thoughts, Jake can tell by the distant look in your eyes. 
The sound of birds chirping in the distance fills the silence that falls between the two of you. 
Any other day, Jake would love this. He savors every second he’s with you, even if it’s just pure silence. 
But this silence was different. It wasn’t the usual comforting, warm silence that the two of you share on a typical day. This one held tension, tension so thick that Jake doesn’t know where to begin thinking. 
But here’s the thing. Jake doesn’t think. 
Not when it comes to you. 
He takes a deep breath. Rubs his hands together. Pats them on his lap. Turns towards you. 
“Look, I-” 
“I think I might like you.” The words come out of your mouth so fast, Jake’s positive he heard you wrong the first time around. 
He whips his head to meet your eyes, your own already staring back at him, your bottom lip nervously tucked under your teeth. 
“No, I––I do. I know I do. I’m sorry. I didn’t know how to tell you and I don’t think I’m doing a very good job right now,” the words are all of the sudden tumbling out of your mouth as if your brain flipped a switch and isn’t able to turn it off. “In hindsight, I should’ve known better to fake date my own best friend. But these past few days made me realize how much I love being with you. And not like how I’m always with you 24/7 before this entire thing started, but being with you. I even started getting that weird, bubbly feeling in my stomach every time I so much as heard your name. And then last night at the party, I realized afterwards that I wouldn’t have kissed you if some part of me didn’t see you in that way. Even if it meant Jay would’ve been on our asses all night if I didn’t. So yeah.” 
You finish with a deep breath and look up at him to meet his widened eyes. Silence.
Jake thought he was braindead during last week’s history quiz. Jake thought he was braindead when he had to cram a semester’s worth of chemistry content the night before his exam. Heck, Jake thought he was braindead when you first told him about your idea of a fake dating him. But no, this is braindead.
He’s finally hearing what he’s been dreaming of for so long, and of all times, now his brain decides to shut off.  
“Are you..uh..are you gonna say anything?” You’re nervously fumbling with your hands, desperate to distract yourself with anything else apart from his silent stare. 
"Why are you sorry?" Jake says before his mind can think of anything else. He doesn't pay attention to his thumping heart that's one look-from-you away from exploding right then and there. "You didn't do anything wrong. If anything, you took the words right out of my mouth.” 
Now you're staring at him with the wide eyes, the words processing in your mind.
Jake realizes he's waited too long to do this. A few years too long. He also realizes he shouldn't have put on that extra layer of a flannel. The nervous tension created by the two of you was suffocating enough, and being outside under the bright sun didn’t help. 
"I like you too. God y/n, I like you too so much," Jake doesn't even care if his words are all sorts of messed up right now. He just needs you to get the idea. "I have for a while now.” 
You let out a relieved sigh, ecstasy rushing through your blood. “Really? I think I have for a while too. I’m so stupid, it took me so long to realize it. It didn’t hit me until I realized how I felt around you, compared to the guy I’m supposed to actually have a crush on.” 
Jake lets out a laugh, the tension immediately dissolving. “Hey, if it wasn’t for Sunghoon, I don’t think we’d be here right now.” 
“You’re right, I’m too oblivious and you’re too awkward to actually make a move,” you wink at him. If his heart wasn’t fluttering at the sight of you, on his porch on a Saturday morning, confessing your feelings to him, Jake probably would’ve lightly shoved you away. 
Instead, he’s turning to you with the most endeared look on his face, and you’re blushing underneath his gaze.
“What? Stare much?” You giggle, quoting the boy himself as you shyly duck your head to avoid his stare. 
Jake gently grabs your chin to tilt your face towards his, and before you can process what’s happening, he suddenly meets your lips with his own, closing the gap between you two. 
Jake thinks if the ground underneath him right now decided to open up and swallow him whole, he’d die happily. 
Jake smiles against you, feeling comfort in ways he’ll never be able to achieve without you. 
Your hands instinctively find their way into his hair, as one of his rests below your ear, thumb softly caressing your cheek, the other pulling you in by the waist. He’s naturally leaning into you, gravitating towards your warmth, unable to stop the giddy feeling bubbling in his stomach. 
He doesn’t think the feeling will ever go away. 
When you pull away to catch your breath, you rest your head against the nook of his neck, basking in his presence as his arms both find their way around your waist. You sigh in pleasure. 
“Remember at the beginning of all of this, when you told me ‘Just try not to fall in love with me?’” Jake gently says. Jake feels the slight nod you give against his shoulder as you hum in response. 
Jake whispers two more words into your ear, filling you with happiness and warmth you know you won’t be able to find through anyone––or anything––else. 
“Too late.” 
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✰ if you made it ‘til the end, ily :’))))) 
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rebornologist · 3 years ago
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college headcanons for tsuna, gokudera, yamamoto, kyoko, and haru please? thank you very much 🤍🤍
So glad I can use my uni student exp for something, FINALLY. Thank you for rqing! <3
♡KHR College Headcanons ✧
༚✧⁺˳₊˚‿︵‿︵‿୨୧ · ˳ · ♡ · ˳ · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿˚₊˳⁺✧༚
Tsunayoshi Sawada
The only reason he's in college is because the rest of his friends are he actually has no idea what he's doing in life because it sure as hell ain't being a mafia boss for a living (or is it..?)
He either oversleeps or does his best to plan how to get to class in time, usually winding up late anyway
He came in undeclared and eventually decides on something in the humanities like sociology, since he's intuitive and thinks that if anything, he wants to help people with his skills?
Whenever he's struggling with assignments, Gokudera is pretty much a text away, busting ass to his accommodation and offering to basically do his homework for him
Tsunayoshi Sawada you cannot give in to this temptation beause you will eventually be found out and reported to student judicial affairs
Frequently found facedown over his textbooks, drooling and snoring because he tried to study but his brain is just sludge whenever he opens the textbook
Can't cook for shit but he has lots of very kind friends so they invite him over for dinner and study dates and game nights so despite how lost he is with his uni goals, he loves the people around him and the atmosphere
Hayato Gokudera
Okay lol so he's an engineering student but the thing is as a physics or engineering student, you have to sign a contract stating that you don't use what you learn in college to make bombs...
He now has the struggle of sticking to his contract, and doing his little mafioso thing.... so he switches to mythology or something in the lit department
He's now free to write all about his beloved cryptids, but he still takes a lot of stem classes because he has that brain for classic academia and it's an easy A for him anyway (and anything he does pick up is super useful teehee)
He's kind of a weirdo for this, but he either tries to build his schedule so he can see Tsuna, or take the same elective class so that he has an excuse to hang out with him
He runs on energy drinks and coffee and instant ramen, Kyoko insists that he needs to change his living habits if he wants to live past his 40s (she's joking, of course)
He has a soft spot for the campus strays, and often carries cat treats in his bookbag in case he runs into one; Any other passing students would melt at the sight of him giving the stray kitties treats and belly rubs
Takeshi Yamamoto
He's here because he has a baseball scholarship lol so I don't know what he studies.... the art of the bat, perhaps
Anyway he shows up to class (sometimes) and just spends the whole time eating, like chugging his protein drinks and having a whole ass 5 course meal in the back of the lecture hall, because he has practice today...
The people who are lucky enough to see him in class definitely have a crush on him, and he's the eye candy for everyone at the home games
He's literally the dreamboat hottie that everyone's pining for, and yes he's the one inviting Tsuna over for dinner and games <3 He can make a few good dishes because he learned from the best
He ends up at so many parties just because he's that carefree outgoing guy and everyone loves him so he's on every frat boy's guest list; He uses his big boy powers for good and essentially hangs out as usual at parties but he always catches any predatory behavior that any nasty people dare to pull and he puts a stop to it instantly (man's built like a mafioso amirite <3)
So that just makes him the best person to have around because he chills hard but also keeps people safe ugh I love him I'd invite him to my parties
Kyoko Sasagawa
Nursing student probably, we love women in STEM <3
She takes the neatest notes and definitely has colour coded pens and highlighters, she's the reliable classmate that people go to when they miss some notes or want a study buddy
She kind of overworks herself, and is a hypocrite about it because she will insist to her friends that they have to take breaks but she herself studies late into the nights because pre-med is rough y'all..
Even in college, she's the 'it girl' on the med campus; She usually walks around with friends though so any random people that approach her have to face Hana and Haru first..
She fosters rabbits!! Her housemates have a certain corner of their house set up for foster animals; Imagining Kyoko coming out of her room and just slumping down next to the fluffy babies for some therapy cuddles, a tired pout on her face as she just pulled another near all-nighter for her upcoming midterm
Gets her housemates and herself celebratory cakes after exam season; after trudging through the semester's work, she turns her brain off and just spends her breaks having pure leisure time before classes resume
Haru Miura
Costume design student :)
She's top of her class because she's basically been a pro since middle school if you think about it..
The only time she struggles is when she helps other students with their final projects a ton because she's just too nice and next thing you know, the deadline is coming up and she still has so much to do
She always makes her deadlines though, because she puts too much pressure on herself to ever miss an assignment
She lives in a shared apartment with Kyoko and other lovely ladies and thems! They frequently throw super cute and fun and wholesome holiday parties where everyone's super dressed up and the entire house is decorated to the rafters
She also bakes with her housemates frequently because college stress baking is real and the desserts they make always cheer Kyoko up and rip her from her little study corner
She definitely turns up to class with unwashed hair and sweats, always on the verge of being late; OR dressed super fancy and with her hair done and face beat, she looks like two different people because of how extreme the difference is lol but she’s cute either way <3
Costume design student :)
She's top of her class because she's basically been a pro since middle school if you think about it..
The only time she struggles is when she helps other students with their final projects a ton because she's just too nice and next thing you know, the deadline is coming up and she still has so much to do
She always makes her deadlines though, because she puts too much pressure on herself to ever miss an assignment
She lives in a shared apartment with Kyoko and other lovely ladies and thems! They frequently throw super cute and fun and wholesome holiday parties where everyone's super dressed up and the entire house is decorated to the rafters
She also bakes with her housemates frequently because college stress baking is real and the desserts they make always cheer Kyoko up and rip her from her little study corner
She definitely turns up to class with unwashed hair and sweats, always on the verge of being late; OR dressed super fancy and with her hair done and face beat, she looks like two different people because of how extreme the difference is lol but she’s cute either way <3
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hungarianbee · 4 years ago
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Way of the Witcher: bits of lore
Disclaimer:  Post contains spoilers to the Witcher games These things may be canon-typical, but the following trigger warnings apply if you want to check out the cards: gore, monster dismemberment, needles, body horror, insects and spiders
“In a world plagued by horrors and monstrosities humanity desperately needed a new type of weapon to turn back the tide. Created by ingenious Alzur, witchers — professional monster slayers of exceptional strength, speed, and agility were tasked to end the threat once and for all. Organized into different schools they honed their craft and passed their knowledge onto novices in training. Some of them were destined to become the legendary heroes and protectors of humanity. Others — the very thing they were supposed to fight…”
Since the gwent expansion was anounced I followed it with rapt attention; every bit of lore is a gem in my eyes. I decided to write down my thoughts of the cards and lore pieces revealed in a post. Share that knowledge around, amirite?
The post references Gwent cards which were leaked (2020 november-december). The theme is mutation and everything that comes with it; namely sweet-sweet lore of the lesser known witcher schools: the Bears, Cats, Vipers and Griffins.
Tucker in, under the cut there is 4.5k analysis of each card that came out.
We’re starting with a theme, then work our way throught the 4 schools (each contain the following:  a leader, a mentor, an adept, a general witcher, a specific job, an item, a school relevant monster, 2  known witchers and a location), then go through a Witcher 1 throwback, Salamandra, and round it with a few new monsters and neutral cards. 
While I describe most of the cards concisely and all the known witchers and locations are on my blog, you might want to look the cards in their (small) glory: [DO IT HERE]
Sounds good? Here we go!
Edit: [this source is better]
The theme is mutation - be it monsters created by transmutation, witchers or salamadra
If that is true, there are monster cards that seemingly stand out: the Succubus and the Phooca
If we are to believe that they do connect to the mutation theme, then
(1) we can conclude that Phoocas (a rare, and more dangerous form of Nekkers; they can pull your head off by sheer force, watch out) are a natural mutation of the original species,
(2) but we’re still left with the Succubi (an inherently demonic creature). They might have chosen it because of its appearance: succubi have horns and goat-like legs. (Note: in the graphic novel “House of Glass” the succubus character has wings, but lacks hooves. In that sense, she could be mutated.)
Breaking it down into factions/schools (some of the cards can be paired up; these cards are interpreted together):
School of the Viper: starting with the vipers, because they are my favourite
Viper Witcher Mentor & Viper Witcher Adept: the flavour text says that the Viper mentors are exceptionally cold and ruthless, and that’s underlined by the story the art tells: the mentor busies himself with sharpening a blade, and in the background we can see the adept attempting to kill his best friend goat, as was ordered. The mentor watches this from the corner of his eye. Young Vipers are to kill their pets (which they nurtured for years) before becoming a fully-fledged witcher. The latter could mean that the boy depicted on the card hasn’t even gone through the Trial of Grasses.
Viper Witcher: On the card we see an unknown Viper crouching over a royalty he killed. I feel like this type of card is meant to represent what we think a general Witcher of said school would be like. Apparently Vipers just like to slay the nobility *shrug*. The flavour text informs us, that Vipers call their two swords “fangs”, and that their style consists of fast and furious attack aimed to overwhelm the enemy.
Viper Witcher Alchemist: Every school has a specialty; Vipers are proficient in potion or poison making. The right side of the alchemist’s face seems to have healed burn marks; a blown up concoction might have caused it.
Ivar Evil-Eye: So far there’s little to know about Ivar. He was either the Master of the Viper Keep, or the founder himself (gwent suggests the latter). He’s described as heavily scarred (facial scars suggests burns and slash marks too), and each of them has a terrible story to tell.
Warritt the All-Seeing: Warritt is a (newly introduced) Viper with heavy disfiguration to the upper part of his face: his eyes are sealed shut (possibly by burn marks, though his hair remains intact). The art shows Warritt drawing a modified version of the Supirre sign in the air to help with his loss of sight. As the wiki says: “Supirre is a Sign used for eavesdropping. Drawn on a solid surface, it allows the people near this surface to listen nearby conversations which would be normally inaudible due to the distance or background noise.” It was only used in Sapkowsky’s second volume of the Hussite trilogy (not yet translated to English), which is entirely separate from the Witcher novels.
Kolgrim: Fate laughed at this Viper. As a kid he was swapped by a weeper, saved by a witcher, than rejected by his own mother who believed that the fake child was the real one. Later, as a grown witcher Ivar instructed him to find a lost weapon diagram. On his journey he was accused - ironically - in White Orchard of kidnapping a child. Invoking a Temerian law, Kolgrim was told to cleanse their crypt (as seen on the card) then he can go. The truth is revealed in Witcher 3 - Kolgrim was beheaded by the villagers before he could even step into the crypt. To add insult to injury: the child was eaten by a drowner. The gwent card therefore shows the optimistic outcome: that Kolgrim reached the crypt and passed in battle. And what’s up with a crypt full of wraiths anyway? White Orchard is shady, guys. (Lil’ trivia: Kolgrim’s eyes are yellow-green.)
Vypper: Basically an overgrown snake that likes damp marshes (they even fight the local kikimores for territory). They only relate to the mutation theme by their nature - they resemble the “school’s animal”.
Gorthur Gvaed: The Bloodgate Keep is located in the chasms of the Tir Tochair mountains. It’s built so high were you to look down from the bridge leading into the keep, you would only see fog (one could wonder how the vipers trained in these conditions). The bridge is made so that you’d have to cross the lookout tower - it might have served as a check in spot. The post itself is circled by the stone coils of a snake; the top is open and has a huge lit bonfire in the middle for warmth-keeping and possibly signaling. Unluckily, it didn’t stop the Usurper’s army from destroying the keep.
Coated Weapons: They leaned heavily into the alchemy and assassin side of the school. Vipers coat their blades with an acidic liquid, so they can kill a man with a nick of it.
School of the Cat:
Cat Witcher Mentor & Cat Witcher Adept: On the adept card we can see a young Cat walking the tightrope blindfolded (they start with close to the ground and slowly increase the distance with time); the mentor is looking up at him. Like the Vipers, Cat mentors are nonchalant about risking the kids as seen from the flavour text: “If you fall, it’s over. Your nine lives are up, kid.” Furthermore, the background of the Cat Witcher Adept card shows the not yet destroyed Stygga Citadel. The Cat Witcher Mentor is in the same scene and we can see lots of potatoes and cabbages; cats definitely eat their veggies.
Cat Witcher: The card shows a Cat in the heat of battle mid-jump; his hood is up, blood is flying everywhere. The flavour text emphasizes that cats are known for their mad bloodlust, not stopping killing even after the enemy capitulated.
Cat Witcher Saboteur: A Cat perches next to the window, a smoking bomb in hand, eavesdropping on nobles. A rope is hung from somewhere out of the pic, possibly for a quick exit. Vesemir comments that these are many-a deeds the cats did that taint the reputation of witchers.
Gezras of Leyda: Gezras is a not yet known redheaded Cat witcher. Following the pattern he seems to be the founder of the Cat School. His flavour text shows that even back then (when the mutagens made Cats emotionless) they were inclined to dislike humans: “Take a contract from Aen Seidhe over a dh’oine any day, as you’re far less likely to receive a knife between the ribs in place of coin.”
Brehen: Now this cat embodies the Cat madness. He’s known as the Cat of Iello because he massacred everyone there. He was consequently shunned by all the schools, and he was even convinced that Vesemir put a kill order on his head. He met Geralt later in the 1240s on his way to claim the bounty for the princess. Thinking that Geralt was there to rob him of his chance of the bounty, Brehen took a priestess as hostage (this is what we see on the gwent card). Geralt managed to convince him to put away the blade, and they parted without crossing blades. When meeting with the striga he scoffed into her face that “she won’t be his first royal”. But his luck ran out. The Temerians buried him and fabricated the story of a cowardly witcher stealing their coin. I’m halfway convinced we see Brehen in the netflix series.
Gaetan: This boy broke into the fandom like a bulldozer. After the folks in Honorton cheated him of his pay and tried to kill him, Gaetan flew into rage and killed everyone there except Millie, a girl who reminded him of his sister. That’s the scene we see on the card. And then Geralt robs/kills him.
Saber-Tooth Tiger (Stealth): Another huge animal/monster related to the school. It’s story is this: “The prized possession of royal menagerie, until a commando of Scoia’tael assaulted the exhibition, released the beast, and set it upon its cruel masters. Since that day, it has acquired a selective taste for human flesh.” Another cat turning against humans.
Stygga Castle: An outside view of what we already saw on the Cat Witcher Adept card. It’s located on a cliff, and the sun shines into it just right (so that the Cats can bask in the light). The walls form a circle where they shelter the inner grounds, and a bigger tower emerges in the middle. The Castle could be reached by the thin bridge connecting it to the mainland, or by the cliffs (if one is brave enough).
Making a Bomb: Cats seem to have a specialty in bombs. Guess where Lambert got his interest from *winkwink*
School of the Griffin: lots of pairs in this one
Griffin Witcher Mentor & Griffin Witcher Adept: Compared to the other schools, this pairing is tame - the adept is climbing a tree to retrieve a crossbow bolt. We can see the mentor in the background. On the mentor card the adept waves down with the retrieved crossbow bolt in hand. It shows a kind of comradeship that’s not present in the other 3 schools. The flavour text emphasizes the importance of knowledge. Students are afforded to choose their final Trial: recite the entire Liber Tenebrum (Book of Shadows; one of Keldar’s favourite books) or steal a griffin’s egg. Noone’s chosen the former.
Griffin Witcher: The witcher is shown shooting down a griffin. According to the flavour text they prefer hunting with silver-tipped arrowheads instead of swords.
Archgriffin & Griffin Witcher Ranger: On the Griffin Ranger card we see the witcher crouching over track marks. On the archgriffin card he found the albino (or very old) monster, who’s already killed someone (probably a lumberjack, judging by the axe). According to the flavour text, Griffin Witchers are trained to be professional trackers; nothing can stop them to reach their prey. Even though archgriffins are considered the embodiment of courage, loyalty and fighting spirit, the gwent card corrects the notion that the Griffin Witcher were named after the monster. In truth, they got the name in honour of their founder’s mentor, a knight named Gryphon.
Erland of Larvik: Continuing the trend, Erland is the founder of the Griffin School (one of the two that are confirmed 100%). He’s from the first generation of witcher, mutated by Alzur himself. After the Order began fracturing he had a confrontation with Arnaghan (who’ll be the founder of the bear school). Arnaghad almost killed one of his brothers, slashed Erland across the face then parted ways with the Order and left Morgraig Castle with his own group. Seeing that the the remaining witchers couldn’t go on like that, he grabbed his 13 best friend and left to Kaer Seren, where (after purging it from spectres) he founded the Griffin School which focused on magic, preparedness and flexibility. His teaching emphasized knightly values (mimicking his long-dead mentor, a knight named Gryphon) in hopes that it would make future witchers’ life easier. It didn’t.
Coen & Keldar: The cards are mainly connected by background. Coen is finished killing what appears to be an albino arachas (but it’s definitely an insectoid), while Keldar’s taking notes. We can rightly assume that he’s updating their bestiary, since he’s one of the teachers/mentors who focus on gathering and sharing knowledge. Coen’s flexibility shows in the flavour text: “There is no such thing as a fair fight. Every advantage and every opportunity that arises is used in combat.” Not very knightly, is it?
Kaer Seren: The “Star Keep” Erland and his friends fled to. It was used by the Order’s mages to mutate witchers (that’s why it was haunted by spectres). It’s located at the edge of the Dragon mountains by the sea between Poviss and Kovir. It’s said to possess the great library, which later mages tried to get for themselves. They messed up: by bringing down an avalanche on the Keep, that knowledge was destroyed. The keep was badly damaged and many witchers died.
Target Practice: The Griffin School’s specialty is their precise aim - they “can split an apple in two from a hundred paces”.
School of the Bear:
Bear Witcher Mentor & Bear Witcher Adept: The adept card shows that young witcher are taught to catch fish by hand (just like their school relevant animal). On the mentor card the elder witcher leads a group of younglings in the mountains; possibly out to teach tracking. The cards are connected by flavour text. The young Bear witcher-would-be’s need to complete the Trial of the Mountain, which consists of them climbing Mount Gorgon (also known as the Devil Mountain; it is the highest peak of the Amell range) to retrieve a runestone. The Trial often ends with the kids frozen to death. The Bear Mentor card’s flavour confirms it: “If you’re unsure of the way, just keep a lookout for markers - the frozen corpses of would-be witchers.” This sounds ominous - don’t they collect their fallen?
Bear Witcher: Bears are solitary hunters as seen in the flavour text: “life alone can be tough”. The witcher in the pic just dismembered what looks like a ghoul (with a tail?).
Bear Witcher Quartermaster: This one I like. The Quartermaster is an amputee (missing one of his arms, which was taken by a bear; must have won that fight one-handed), yet they still found a job for him where he can be useful. His flavour text suggest he likes Mahakam mead.
Arnaghad: The founder of the Bear School, he never felt kinship with his fellow witchers. After attacking a witcher named Rhys over a contract, wounding him deeply from shoulder to waist, he returned to Morgraig, attacked Erland then left with his possé to found the Bear School - Haern Caduch - in the Amell Mountains. Later he almost died in a betrayal, which resulted in another schism and the foundation of the Viper School.
Gerd: Gerd’s a legendary witcher who fled to Skellige after allying with a Usurper instead of his daughter, who later issued a warrant for his arrest. He has a busy time in Skellige: first slaying a dragon, befriending the Jarl Torgeir, killing a bunch of sirens, losing so many weapon diagrams you wouldn’t believe, losing half his pay and silver sword on gwent, escaping Nilfgaard and managing to slay a striga, killing some of his pursuers, only to be caught up in the siege of Torgeir’s castle, where he died in the ruins. On the card he’s showing Bear-typical strength: he’s tearing apart a siren with his bear hands.
Junod of Belhaven: Junod had a dubious background, but was thought to be the child of a brave dwarf and a giantess. He’s a huge man, with a big bushy beard and bald head. His sobriquet is false; he took it after Ivo, because he liked the ring of it. He was known as a strict haggler and a bit of a gambler. In 1243 he took a contract in hopes of cash (he wanted to forge the Grandmaster Ursine Armour). The subterranean monster was said to live in the caverns. Junod drew bear signs and wrote a warning on the wall (this is the scene we see on the card). He was however ill-prepared; the beast turned out to be a shaelmaar (a type of relic Gaetan slew once) that killed him in that very cavern.
Dire Bear: Once again related to the school in question, the Dire Bear is stuck with so much weaponry that it looks like a walking armory. Lots of witchers must have tried to slay it, yet it still kicks - just like Bear Witchers, it’s resilient till the very end.
Haern Caduch: Built into the side of the Amell Mountains, it’s the coldest environment of all the schools. As with the other schools, the Bears were forced out of it due to folk riots. It was left in disrepair to be buried under snow and ice (as seen on the card). It’s name could be translated as “Piercing Whiskers”.
Armor Up: As Bear’s are more likely to stand in the way of attack than dodge, they need to wear a heavy armour at all times.
Salamandra:
Roland Bleinheim & Gellert Bleinheim: Witcher 1 characters. They are thought to be brothers, leading the Salamandra organization. As drug lords one heads the fisstech operation in Vizima’s sewers (Roland), the other in the swamps (Gellert). The flavour text pretty much matches: both of them wondering what the other one is doing.
Salamandra Mage: The art itself was already leaked in China around 2 years back, and there were a few theories. One of them was that the man depicted is Zerrikanian, and I think that’s correct. Both the facial tattoo, darker skin, thinly braided hair and fire magic points in that direction. Azar Javed (a known Salamandra fire mage) happens to be a Zerrikanian escapee too.
Salamandra Lackey: A girl with the Salamandra-stapled mask runs from a city guard. The flavour text says the following: “Lackeys are expected to perform their first five jobs for no pay, demonstrating their passion for the gig.” The organization monitors from the beginning that only those remain who are extremely loyal to their cause.
Fallen Rayla: A little background for those who are unfamiliar with her: Rayla of Lyria was a veteran of the Nilgaardian Wars. She harbours anti-nonhuman sentiments after she was captured by Scoia’taels and severely maimed. The Rayla we see on the card is a mutant - in Witcher 1 she was supposedly shot down by Scoia’tael, and Salamandra found her close to death, subjected her to mutation. She was killed by Geralt.
Salamander: The card shows a bright blue spotted salamander. It has two tails and heads (possibly grown together?). The Salamander is a symbol of the organization. Metaphorically speaking it could mean, that Salamandra thought of itself as something untouchable: “best to avoid petting them, as the salamander, when threatened, secretes a deadly toxin”.
Failed Experiment: The card - ironically - thrives when it’s poisoned. The “experiment” only resembles a human in shape. It’s clutching the table ends, as if trying to escape still.  It’s fair to assume that they later dissected it: “even failed experiments can serve a purpose”.
Salamandra Abomination: A step further from the failed experiment - we see the results of pushing science’s boundaries. Only the skull is left intact, everything else of the body is covered with insectoid-like growths.
Stolen Mutagens: Gruesome organ harvesting. The witcher heart (?) glows, which is either an artistic decision (probable) or the mages sent magic into the body, and the mutagens light up (like angiographia). Three types of mutagens can be harvested: red (strength), blue (magic) or green (resilience). I headcanon that the amount they inject of the three types can vary - that’s how you get strength inclined witchers like the wolves (red), or big ass mothers like the bears (green).
Salamandra Hideout: There are multiple hideouts in Witcher 1 (outskirt of Visima, crypt in sewers and one in the trade quarters). The one depicted here is the fisstech lab in the sewers. It shows a dimly lit, cobwebbed room. There’s an elevation where a body lays on the table. The elevation’s floor is gridded, so the blood and other fluids can freely flow down into the sewer water, where many bodies are already discarded recklessly.
Neutral:
Alzur & Viy & Koshchey: Alzur was a charismatic mage and spell inventor, who created many horrible monsters, like the koshchey (with the spell: Alzur’s Double Cross) and the Viy (a huge centipede-like insectoid). He was also the one who did the lion’s share of work with the witcher’s mutation.
Cosimo Malaspina: Cosimo was the teacher of Alzur. He was known for his knowledge in hybridization and genetic modification. Him and Alzur were the true creators of the witchers sect. On the gwent card, three man are shown prodding at a mutated body. Cosimo (the old dude) is in the middle, Alzur might be the one on the left and that leaves Idarran on the right. His flavour text paints him as cold and clinical, someone without empathy: “Children keep asking him for gifts. He doesn’t know why, but it really helps with finding subjects for his experiments.”
Idarran of Ulivo & Idr & Wererat: Idarran was one of the contributers of the witcher experiments. He’s an expert in hybridization and genetic modification, whose teacher was Alzur. He was a pale kid who lived in the canals of Vizima and experimented on rats at the age of 5. He found beauty in gruesome creations, like the Wererat (a human-sized rat on roids) and the Idr (a big centipede-like insectoid). He’s disdained by Geralt for his many monsters.
Triangle within a Triangle: It’s a magic spell used to introduce a series of mutations and to greatly increase the mass of a given body. That way they can create huge monstrosities, like the koshchey. Adepts often confuse it with a pentagram which can lead to infernal disasters.
Selective mutation: The card shows a close up of a young man’s eyes - one mutated (catlike) one human. His skin shows his high toxicity level, ashen with prominent veins. He’s held down as alchemists prepare to inject a yellow concoction into the human eye. It’s possible that after the success of witchers the mages tried to recreate the changes in smaller scale, then unmake it in turn, unsuccessfully.
Witcher Student: This is not really a card, but I included it anyway. The card’s ability is - ironically - doomed, and to add insult to injury, its flavour text is the following well-known fact: “Four out of ten boys survive… at most.” It’s also a point for black humour that the gwent commentators added: the Trial of Grasses card boosts this unit significantly.
Berengar: He’s a Wolf School Witcher who blamed his school for denying him a normal life and consequently abandoned them. In Witcher 1 Geralt can decide to kill or spare him. In a letter he admits that he was a coward because he betrayed Kaer Morhen and worked with Salamadra in hope that they can undo his mutation. His card references a questline in Witcher 1, where he tried to reason with the vodyanoi (~lovecraftian fish people) to spare the village’s prize-winning cow, named Strawberry. This is non-canon; in the game Geralt takes over the quest to do this instead.
Leo: Another Witcher 1 character. He was an orphan taken in by Vesemir. He was a kind-hearted but hot-headed man, who had all the training but not the mutations and the experience - he never killed a man. The flavour text of his gwent card kind of mocks his death: “He would have caught the arrow if he only had some heads-up.” He’s burned on a pyre and his cenotaph can be found south of Kaer Morhen.
Geralt: Quen: The last classical sign that wasn’t yet a card. In the art, Geralt is wearing the Manticore armour
Snowdrop: She’s a not yet seen character; impish looking female bard with light blond hair (flowers braided on the side) who plays a medieval version of the fiddle to a rooster. There’s a horseshoe hanging from the hem of his pants. She’s also seen in the gwent: journey #3 launch trailer. She’s narrating that she was saved by Alzur. Alzur told her about his plans of creating witchers to fight the beasts of the Continent, and she admired him so much she spread his story (”let me tell you about the greatest sorceress to ever lived”). Their story will unveil in the next week, I’ll probably update accordingly. It’s also interesting that Alzur says in the gwent intro (regarding witchers): “Bards will toil to do justice to their feats.” As if his own successes and experiences will be mirrored in his creations. Projecting much?
Monsters:
Viy & Idr: both of them are centipede-like insectoids conjured by infamous mages (see: Alzur and Idarran)
Wererat: same can be said about this one. Idarran experimented on Vizima’s sewer rats since the age of 5. This human sized abomination was the end result.
Succubus: We already discussed how the “Succubus” doesn’t fit the theme. Other interesting thing is the surrounding of her - in the background we can see a skull full of some kinda of dark liquid; she’s also holding a goblet. I’m not saying she’s drinking blood, but if she does, it would shed some questions as succubi don’t need to drink blood at all.
Phooca: As nekkers’ rare big brother, phoocas are ogroids that have the strength to rip a man’s head off with their bear hands. According to the wiki, in Celtic folklore they are regarded as shapeshifting fairies.
Koshchey: A witcher 1 boss, koshcheys are spider-like abominations summoned by mages. The woman standing her ground in the picture is Visenna (Geralt’s druid mom). In the story she’s the one to kill the first koshchey ever created.
Spontaneous Evolution: Under the Red Moon the wolf mutated into an amalgamation of eyes and teeth. Malaspina possibly added something to the mix that proved unstable. The card’s name is kind of ironic - this change is not spontaneous (it was induced) but could be related to evolution (it would imply that this form is somehow advantageous to the current environment and helps adaptation). (Note: in my opinion spontaneous generation would be a better term: it’s the thought that living creatures could arise from nonliving matter.)
Hybrid: the card shows a two-headed wolf or dog. Pretty straight-forward.
Chimera: A creature created my Cosimo Malaspina. He combines the genes of a fiend and griffin, then added a trace of insectoid and wyvern. It kind of looks like a furred wyvern with antlers. Interestingly the frightener (an insectoid; a rare result of magical experiment) is also called a chimera.
Dol Dhu Lokke: a new monster lair location. The depending on how you translate “lokke” the Elder can be read as “black valley place” or “alluring black valley”. It’s so dangerous - housing many-a horrors - that even a witcher thinks twice before going near it.
Interesting tidbits
Coen has hair, which is weird because so far he was described in all sources as bald.
There used to be a card  that was also called Viper Witcher, which is now referred to as “Kingslayer”
The Bear Witcher’s face was drawn after one of CDPR’s employee.
The Koshchey’s card title has a typo: “Koschchey”.
Easter eggs (mainly in flavour text)
The Spontaneous Evolution card references The Powerpuff Girls intro: “Professor Malaspina accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction - compound X.”
The Bear Witcher card might reference a song of Baloo from the Jungle Book (The Bare Necessities): “Life alone on the road can be tough - be sure to bring all the bare necessities.”
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ask-the-twst-girls · 3 years ago
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Interactions with the twst!girls Part 1: Rosia Rosehearts
Quick note: I decided to start this series just to clarify how the muses in this blog in would interact with their fellow NRC students, or at least the core cast. This list will be rather long so I will be making this a series. This will be rather long, but anyway, Let's get Started!
Rosia Rosehearts
General Headcanons
Being a 2nd-year transfer from Golden Crown University (Girls version of RSA), Rosia was very off-spoken and polite when she first entered NRC.
Her concerning nature has basically caused everyone to see her as either as an older sister or a Mom-figure, so she's used to it.
In her opinion, everyone in her dorm is her family and she does her best to look out for everyone. Especially as a 3rd-year
Her Unique Magic is pretty handy and she can play therapist when she needs to. She doesn't do it all the time though and in Heartslaybul, it's basically an unspoken rule that if something is wrong, or you have a problem, you go to Rosia.
Heartslaybul Relations
We'll start with Riddle since he's practically king here (and it's his B-Day LOL).
Rosia and Riddle are blood-related as Cousins, so they are very close. Riddle doesn't like it when Rosia coddles her too much, so she knows the boundaries.
Only when they are behind closed doors is she allowed to hug him, give him treats or whatever she normally does when it's just the two of them.
Rosia is extremely protective of Riddle, since she knows first-hand how bad his side of the family is
Alright, next we'll go to Trey. Rosia knows him because he's friends with Riddle. She often plays messenger because of the "incident" that happened when Riddle and Trey were kids (i.e: getting caught by Riddle's mother)
As a result, if Trey has anything he wants to give Riddle, it's usually through Rosia.
Between the two of them, Rosia sees him as a brother, almost. She's glad that he's also worried about Riddle and that she doesn't have to bear that burden alone.
Loves it when he bakes Pear cakes, one of her favorite treats.
Alrighty, with Cater, I will warn you ahead of time that there is Canon x OC content ahead, so if you don't want to hear it, I suggest you move on.
Cater basically fell in love with Rosia at first sight. He claimed that he reminded her of Roselia, the painting mentioned in the game. Of course, it took a while for Rosia to feel the same way about Cater, as she wasn't one normally for Romance.
During her first (2nd-year) year in NRC, she treated Cater like a brother. However, when she entered her third year, it wasn't long before she started to have some feelings for him.
Despite his phone addiction, she still found a way to like him. She does encourage Cater to take a few minutes away from his phone, but it doesn't always work. It doesn't bother her though, as he's pretty open about what he does.
Doesn't mind whenever he wants to post selfies of their activities.
When they announced they were dating, it took Trey holding Riddle back to keep him from beheading Cater on the spot. I mean, this is his cousin we're talking about XD
He eventually got used to it, with some help from Rosia.
Now onto the Idiot duo. Rosia refers to Ace and Deuce as the "Dorm Brothers" as to her, they have a pretty brotherly rivalry. Ergo "Dorm Brothers".
No matter how many times Ace tried to remind her that he had an older brother, Rosia is still pretty set on it.
She seems particularly worried about the mischief they get into. Not because of the dorm's reputation, but mostly because she doesn't want Riddle to bust a vein yelling at them.
Ace is rather annoyed by Rosia and her worrying but Deuce respects her a lot. Mostly because she's an upper-classman.
Savannaclaw Relations
Alright, let's move on to Savannaclaw. In general, Rosia tends to stay away from there, due to the unsavory nature of many of the Beastmen (not saying they're perverts but what do you expect from a bunch of rowdy delinquents?)
With Leona, Rosia doesn't like how lazy he is. She has come across him napping a few times or just slacking off in general.
She will scold him whenever he is overworking Ruggie or not respecting him. She doesn't even flinch whenever he yells back at her.
Her Secret: Whenever he gets into an unreasonable mood, she always imagines him as her aunt (Riddle's mother) and is able to stay calm, as opposed to crying or running away like some of the other girls have.
Leona always calls her the "Nagging Red-Head" and claims that she's worse then Riddle, which she doesn't care about.
For her, it's on sight and she won't hesitate to remind Leona to get his ass to class or even do more to help Ruggie. She dislikes Slackers in general and no insults are enough to get through to her.
With Ruggie, Rosia will not hesitate to help him if she sees that he needs it. Especially if it has to do with Leona. After all, whenever she sees the poor guy struggling, she can't help it.
Will sometimes give Ruggie homemade donuts made by Trey to help his mood. Even when Trey doesn't bake, Rosia will buy him some from the store or just any treat to ease his mind.
Will often offer advice on how to deal with Leona (based on personal experience) or tips on a system to help keep his room neater.
Ruggie sees her as an older sister (like a lot of the other students) and appreciates her efforts to help. Even if it doesn't look very manly, at least there's donuts in it.
Rosia is the same way with Taai, as she sees them both as one and the same.
Since Taai struggled with being the only girl in Savannaclaw and Leona rejected her as a member of the Magift Club, Rosia was more then happy to play a part in the Female Team.
Since then, Rosia is happy to see Taai more confident and will help if the situation calls for it.
With Jack, Rosia heard through the grapevine that he had a past with Vil and their friendship started when she started asking him for advice (reasons will become relevant later)
Jack has heard about her from Taai and Ruggie and even saw her helping students on occasion. Seeing her also scold trouble-making students for causing disturbances, even when they retaliated also bought his respect.
He respects her as an Upper-classman, a girl and even a disciplinarian (since he saw her from the incident earlier)
Rosia in turn is secretly in love with Jack's Fluffy tail. (It's Fuzzy! What can I say!!!??) One of her secret desires is to pet it one time, but she knows Jack wouldn't like it, so she refrains. After all, you gotta respect boundaries
Octavinelle Relations
Rosia is very well aware of the rumors surrounding the Azul and the Tweels and after seeing first-hand the experience that her fellow dorm members (such as Ace and Deuce) go through when they sign a contract, then she knows better then to fall into the same trap.
Azul sees her an a potential client (like he does with a lot of the students) and does his dangdest to get Rosia to sign a contract. Thankfully, the red-head is too smart for that.
He's kinda jealous of her Unique Magic and the effect it has on People. As such, he aspires to have that ability in order to calm agitated people into signing contracts (convincing, amirite?)
Sadly, he has to bide his time. After all, some Roses have Thorns
Jade simply respects Rosia and her choice not to sign a contract. After all, it's her loss.
He admires her ability to stay calm in difficult situations that most people would be freaking out in. He wondered at first if that was the same with all girls, but later experiences proved to be a no to his answer
Rosia in turn admires how stoic Jade can be and sometimes remarks that it's almost as if he is a butler (*cough* Sebastian *cough*).
Even though Azul has asked him to use his Unique Magic to try and get his hands on Rosia's deepest, darkest secret, he refuses. After all, he only gets one shot at using his U.M. If he were to use it on her, then it has to be something good.
With Floyd, Rosia is able to navigate his mood swings. Since her Unique Magic involves emotions, then this is right up her ally.
She is often very gentle whenever Floyd is in a good mood. Afterall, she'd be doing Azul and Jade a disservice if she upset him in any way. And besides, if Floyd is happy, then Riddle is happy (LOL)
Floyd finds some of the songs that she hums at times very cheerful and asks her to teach her some of the words, which she happily obliges to.
Helps his mood a great deal when he hums them while at work in the lounge, even if it confuses the shit out of Azul and Jade.
With Scylla, Rosia treats her like a little sister. She also makes sure to heck that Azul and the Tweels don't torture her in any way. After all, she's one of the younger students.
Rosia will also scold them if Scylla complains to her about working overtime, as she's not a huge fan of child labor laws.
Scylla likes hanging out in Heartslaybul and is already good friends with Deuce, so Rosia isn't surprised whenever she comes over.
Scarabia Relations
Rosia is generally very respectful of Students form Scarabia. She can relate to their problem-solving abilities and their knack for staying calm in hard situations.
With Kalim, the biggest ray of sunshine in this school, Rosia gets the impression that he's too pure for this world. Heck, she's surprised that he even got into NRC to begin with.
As much as she likes Kalim, she feels he's better off in RSA, since he doesn't even seem like the type of student to attend NRC. But she doesn't say anything out loud. It's partially out of worry for him and concern for Jamil.
Other then that, she is able to tolerate his extrovert nature and is able to keep up with his eager banter.
Kalim himself likes Rosia a lot and sees her like an older sister. He enjoys being around her and always listens whenever she gives him advice. Even if he forgets it half the time.
With Jamil, Rosia is able to sympathize with his position with Kalim. In her own way, she does worry and is willing to listen to him rant about his dislike of Kalim.
You would think that this makes her interacting with Kalim, hard, but it doesn't. Rosia is able to tell that these are only emotions Jamil is feeling and that's what's leading him to think about this. She fully supports his ambition to travel the world upon graduation.
Jamil won't admit it, but he appreciates Rosia worrying and always accepts her offers to take a step back to address his emotions to her.
With Shi and Amee, they see Rosia as an Obstacle. With their own ambitions on getting closer to Jamil and Kalim, they think that Rosia is trying to one-up them.
As such, they regard her with hostility and often avoid her at all chances. Mostly because she's an upper-classman and she could get them into trouble. Plus, they aren't always in the mood to hear her scold them.
With Sahara, Rosia often checks up on her, seeing as Sahara is related to Briar, who is a member of Trad. Dance club.
Even though it's for Briar, Sahara can get easily annoyed by Rosia's probing and asking. Even so, she doesn't hesitate to admit anything she is asked about, mostly because she's afraid Briar will come after her later.
Pomefiore Relations
With Pomefiore, Rosia is well-acquainted with many female students from that dorm, as some of them are in Trad. Dancing Club, or she's worked them on some of the projects Vil has asked her assistance on.
This is where Jack's advice on dealing with Vil comes in handy, as Vil and Rosia have a very love/hate relationship. Rosia isn't too keen on dealing with famous people. Mostly because popularity isn't something she's too into.
She does admire Vil's ability to act and perform, but his strict working style kinda puts her off. With him criticizing people left and right, she doesn't know how people are still confident afterwards.
Vil in turn has heard about Rosia and her calm nature. From afar, he doesn't think she's much to look at, but he has to admit she knows how to calm a room down.
When Trad. Dancing was struggling to find a place to meet, he was the one who stepped forward to offer Pomefiore's ballroom, but on one condition: That Rosia's club would assist the Movie Appreciation club when they needed extra people. After all, you can't go wrong when you hire dancers, amirite?
With Rook, Rosia is very very very wary. With some of the tales she's heard from Pomefiore girls, she's wondering what Rook's true motives are.
Even with Rook being polite with her, Rosia does her best to be polite, though she can't help but feel secretly unsettled.
Rook in turn admires Rosia for her level-headed nature. He often vocally admires her when he sees her say or do something. Vil sometimes questions whether he has a crush on her or not.
With Epel, Rosia worries about him a lot. After all, with Vil's strict nature and Rook's stalker tendencies, how has he not gone insane?
Epel does appreciate it when Rosia stands up for Vil and scolds him for all the tough things he's put him through. After all, you can't expect a country boy like Epel to know Fancy Folk talk.
Rosia doesn't stop Epel when he runs from his duties, but she doesn't help him either. In her opinion, it's out of her hands and she's not going to get involved.
With Annabelle, Rosia has worked alongside her when Trad. Dancing volunteers for Vil's Projects in his club. She's admires Annabelle's sewing skills and is open to learn so that she can fix torn clothes in Heartslaybul.
Annabelle likes Rosia as well and respects her an an upper-classman. She also secretly asks Rosia for dance lessons, as she is very clumsy when it comes to dancing and doesn't want to embarrass herself in front of her dormmates.
Unlike her younger sister, Danielle is a different case. Haughty and dismissive, Danielle often looks down on people she deems unfit to be students of NRC and Rosia just so happens to be one of those people.
Even with someone as crude as Danielle looking down on her, Rosia is still able to hold her own against her and even put her in her place a few times.
As such, Danielle dislikes her and tends to either avoid her, or talk crap about Rosia, even when she can't come up with any truthful dirt to spread on her.
Ignihyde Relations
Rosia doesn't talk much to any of the Ignihyde students, as they are normally shut away in their dorm and dislike any social interaction. While she can understand their case of social anxiety, she does worry about their health and mental well-being.
Rosia hardly interacts with Idia, but when she does, she makes it a point to ask how he's doing. Since Idia hardly makes any public appearances, even at dorm meetings, Rosia often finds herself playing messenger, delivering important papers that Riddle would like to give Idia if he didn't have a case of Anthropophobia (which he might have. I dunno???)
Idia himself sees her as a "Normie" as he often calls many other students. He wants to get annoyed at the fact that Rosia is even trying to interact with him, but with her Unique magic on sometimes, he just can't.
All he can do is resign himself to the fact that if you're not there in person, then a messenger is gonna come. So for now, he just puts up with Rosia's efforts and carries on with life.
Ortho is the only Ignihyde student that Rosia is close with. She adores him and is very sisterly to him whenever they cross paths.
Rosia can sympathize with Ortho's frustration over Idia and his refusal to leave his room. All she can do is explain that some people just don't like social interaction and that it's hard for them to deal with it.
Unlike what she does with other students, Rosia doesn't confront Idia, because she knows that it won't do any good. To her, it works on some people, but not on others. All she can do is just be polite and carry on.
With Clotho, Rosia worries greatly for her. Since Clotho came from an abusive household, Rosia understands all too well the troubles of strict parenting.
She's glad Laechesis is around to correct Clotho on behavioral issues, but will jump in and help if the Fate of the Past isn't around to help out.
Laechesis isn't around at School much, so Rosia has barely seen her, much less interacted with her. But the one or two times they have, Rosia is pleasantly surprised to see that she's not as introverted as her dorm members.
Laechesis in turn appreciates Rosia's help on Clotho and her issues, even if she doesn't show it.
With Atropes, Rosia knows her as Briar's younger sister. Not only that, but she pities the Fate of the Future because of all that she went through in the span of 2 years in NRC.
From getting your hair turned into some weird fiery form to getting both your legs melted off, it's a wonder that Atropes is still sane. If you can even call it that.
Rosia finds herself puzzled at Atropes' trolling nature. From Rickrolling the Academy to sending weird memes to random students, she doesn't understand it.
Atropes herself likes to keep Rosia guessing. After all, what fun is it if it's not trolling?
Diasomnia Relations
Like Ignihyde, Rosia hasn't seen much of Diasomnia, even of it's leader. But she's still respectful towards them, as she knows they are a feared dorm.
When Rosia first met Malleus, she could easily tell that with his Fae Heritage and reputation, he's one of the more famous students. As such, she's polite to him at every chance meeting.
She's not scared or put off by him, but she still gives him his space, as she can tell that he's often off in his own world, something she's learned not to disturb.
But when he's up to talk, she's happy to lend an ear. Even if it's him talking about gargoyles and his Gao Gao Dragon-kun. She thinks it's sweet that he's learning what it's like to live a high-school student.
Malleus in turn is also polite and very appreciative that Rosia doesn't fear him. He enjoys her company and thinks of her as a good friend.
Rosia has heard from Trey about Lilia and his strange tendencies. She's also heard... questionable rumors about his cooking from Briar.
From the few times they've met, Rosia is taken aback by Lilia's insistence that he is way older then her, despite his young appearance. But Fae are Fae, what do you expect?
Lilia himself finds himself intrigued by Rosia and her willingness to help and understand others. He's met a lot of people in his life, some of them like her, but everyone is different, and Rosia is no exception.
He will often talk his old man Shakespearian speech, something that Rosia finds herself amused by.
Rosia is often worried about Silver and his Narcolepsy. On the off-chance she sees him dozing off, she's quick to wake him up.
The red-head sometimes is surprised by seeing the little critters that gather around Silver and as such, she finds it adorable.
Silver, though he doesn't know Rosia very well, still respects her as an upper-classman. After all, Lilia taught him to respect his seniors.
Rosia knows Briar very well, as she's a member of her club, Trad. Dancing. As a result, the two of them are good mutual friends, despite the class and age difference.
Rosia is also amazed by Briar's ability to Irish dance, especially at a high speed.
Briar respects Rosia and often learns a lot from her as an upperclassman. She often comes to Rosia with problems that she needs advice on (some of which Lilia gives terrible advice on, no offense old man).
Sebek, as loud as he is, can often startle Rosia by his boisterous attitude. Since Rosia doesn't like yelling in general, she does her best to avoid the crocodile-man.
Even asking him to be quiet is a lot for her to handle and she just steers clear of him.
Sebek himself sometimes feels insulted that Rosia doesn't like interacting with him, but doesn't complain about it directly to her. Mostly out of respect for his seniors.
On the off-hand he complains to Briar or Silver, he's either met with silence (Silver fell asleep) or Briar scolding him and telling him to maybe shut up once in his life.
Staff
Since they're all teachers, Rosia respects them all to a T. However, some of the attitudes from some teachers are off-putting and try as hard as she might to be polite, she can't help but mentally die on the inside from some cases.
As much as she respects Crowley, Rosia can't help but feel irritated at his seldom unwillingness to act like a headmaster. She won't talk crap about him, but she won't exactly say good things either.
Rosia dislikes Vargas in general, partially because he doesn't exactly treat the girls as equally as the boys and also because she's horrified that he eats raw eggs (I mean, you're gonna get Salmonella, dude!)
Rosia likes and respects Crewel and wonders at times how he manages to stay sane in the midst of all the general disorder and chaos. Even in Alchemy, she wonders how he hasn't died from insanity yet.
Rosia is friendly with Sam and the two of them can find a lot to chat about. From the weather to whatever weird goods he's selling, the two of them have a great time just chatting it out.
Rosia has seen Trien in action and she's not exactly on board with his stern nature. Just seeing him drone on in class and unintentionally put students to sleep, along with harsh punishments, Rosia can understand why Annabelle wants little to do with her father. She also regards him as a grumpy cat woman (LOL)
Well, that's all for now! Next up is Taai Onheil so be on the lookout for that! Hope you liked my general headcanons on interactions, so with that, I'll see you in the next post!
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thotantics · 4 years ago
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✗ warnings — description of sex, do not read if you’re underage, unsafe sex, oral sex (male receiving), dirty talk, slight sub/dom roles, hair pulling, semi-public sex (thank god for tinted windows amirite)
✎ words —   1.2k
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It’s the middle of the evening. The sun is low in the sky and the clouds are pink. Sehun brought you here for a picnic and you were ending your night like horny teenagers, making out in the back seat of his car. His legs spread wide, he pulls you into his lap and you double over, to avoid bumping your head, but mostly to keep your lips securely attached as he groans at the feel of your crotch sliding to meet his erection through the barrier of your clothes.
Neither of you were going to be able to make it home, you realize with a low groan as he begins to thrust rhythmically against the seam of your jeans, his thick cock an unmistakable ridge rubbing just right up against you.
Sehun mouths down your throat, his breath hot and his tongue thick and wet as he laves over a hickey you didn’t realize he’d left on you until you felt his tongue prod the area and how deliciously sore your broken skin felt there. You glance briefly around the open parking lot you’re sitting in. There aren’t many cars around but the road is right there and you’re parked only 100 feet or so from the entrance of the park ahead. The windows of his car are tinted, though, and if you’re quiet, maybe you could get away with this..
Sehun, fumbling to get your breasts exposed over the top of your bra and biting gently at your nipple through your shirt, seems to read your apprehension and eagerness and wraps his arms around you, fisting a hand full of your hair, drawing you roughly down to his mouth even as he teases you with his words mumbled against your parted lips, “You’re always so loud when I make you cum. Someone’s going to catch you~”
You thump your fist lightly against his chest, but you kiss him languidly anyway. He knows you don’t really care. But he has to tease you, doesn’t he? Prick.
A slow grind builds between you, your hips shifting short, back and forth on top of him while he cocks his knees far out to the side, lifting his hips with a quick burst of aggression as his teeth gnash into your bottom lip roughly. He loves grinding against you through your clothes, it drives him crazy with lust. You can feel it, his cock surging and pumping full of blood through his jeans, twitching and throbbing with each groan he let’s out from deep in his chest.
“Are you gonna make me cum like this or you are you going to fucking do something?” Sehun asks after a while, out of breath and his mouth kissed red and wet, his pupils blown as his eyes meet yours expectantly.
“What do you want me to do?” You ask him with a smirk, knowing full well what he wants long before he rolls his eyes with a fond smile, shifting positions as he makes room for you to slide from his lap and into the floor. It’s a cramped position, tucked behind the middle console while Sehun sit sprawled in the back seat. It’s easier if you widen your stance, planting a knee on either side behind the front seats, and keep your torso tucked in against Sehun’s lap.
The position gives him one hell of a view. You had one titty out, your hands fumbling to free his cock, your hair tousled and lips freshly kissed. He admires you with stroking hands, petting your hair affectionately back into place, smoothing it over one shoulder and out of his way so he can see you perfectly when you take his cock into your mouth.
Sehun’s dick is long and thick, and though you have minimal access to move, you’re able to settle your breasts right up against his balls and bob your head over his tip enough that he’s sighing in bliss.
“Fuck, your pretty mouth..” Sehun groans, “You like sucking me, baby?”
You hum in the affirmative, eyes opening to blink sweetly up at him while he watches you swallow around his shaft, taking him as deep as you’re physically able to in the cramped position you’re in. You must be doing a good enough job, because his eyes roll back and his head hits the back of the seat with a soft thud and then he’s, gently at first, beginning to buck his hips and fuck your mouth.
His pace quickens when you make an audible sucking sound, messy and wet, and he grunts as his fingers dig into your hair, yanking on your scalp, pressing you down tighter while he pistons down your throat. Then he yanks you away, without warning, tugging you by the hair into his lap, and when he speaks next it’s through gritted teeth.
“You’re gonna fucking make me cum, little slut.” He smoothly slips your panties aside under your cute little sun dress and fingers you roughly for a moment, your mouth falling open in a pained and pleasured gasp as he kisses firmly at the corner of your mouth, yanking your head again until you open your eyes and look at him, “My pretty girl.” He murmurs, kissing you again and it’s much softer this time.
With practiced ease, Sehun slips into the warmth of your pussy in a single, slick thrust, all while both of you are still fully dressed. He crashes you down against his chest, your upper body bowed over him, and he takes the lead from under you, slamming up into your cunt repeatedly, grunting into your hair.
You hold onto him for dear life, nails biting into his skin, teeth latched onto his throat to stop yourself from being too loud. Instead, it’s Sehun who’s shamelessly noisy, uncaring if the rocking of his car or the sound of his hurried, panted grunts are heard or noticed. Heat rises between you, building rapidly with every harsh thrust of his hips. You hug yourself tightly to him, hips rocking just so, matching his movements so that each thrust up, he catches your clit and with a few frenzied movements, you’re cumming all over him.
“That’s right,” He whispers, cradling your back, holding you down tightly on top of him while he continues to seek his own end, using your throbbing, wildly contracting pussy to get himself off. “You’re so wet, baby, you’re gonna make me cum.”
“Please..” You gasp in reply, thighs shaking with the effort to keep your body still and Sehun notices, pulling you hurriedly to his mouth with featherlight kisses as he quietly begs you.
“Take it all for me, please.” His hips stutter, and you wrap your arms tight around his head, fingers tangling in his hair, kissing him back desperately. “Fuck you’re so good,” He gasps, “So fucking good for me..”
He’s bursts with a breathless cry of your name, coating your insides with thick ropes of cum again and again, until you laugh breathlessly and exclaim in shock at the sheer volume.
Sehun laughs with you, his cheeks flushed from over exertion and the heat the two of you had accumulated in his car. He leans forward with you still nestled on his lap, his dick still buried in you, and he quickly turns on the car’s AC.
Settling back in the back seat, he hugs you to his chest for a moment of silence while you both settle down and regain control over your thundering heart beats. After a while, he presses a kiss to your temple.
“Alright, gorgeous. Let’s get you home.”
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library-with-tales · 4 years ago
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Bungou Stray Dogs Band AU that I spontaneously came up with like a second ago.
Based off the mobile game if you haven’t noticed. Someone probably already thought of this buuuuut I like my idea so here we go:
World setting
Port Mafia, Armed Detective Agency and The Guild are music agencies while the other smaller groups are just bands (haven’t read manga yet but I’m aware there are other groups). The Special-too-long-of-a-name people are the big boy cooperation (I am so uneducated with the music world why do I do this to myself).
Port Mafia are filled with talented people yes, but they have the habit of straining the music artists sometimes (this will be relevant in a bit) and are more focused on the monz. If you want a reference, their music are on the same level as your good ol’ big pop groups, the real famous on the radio ones.
Armed Detective Agency (in this case they’re called Armed Music Agency, yes they are still armed) is a smaller agency since they prioritize quality and feelings over quantity and catchiness, which makes them pretty indie tbh, They have songs that don’t particularly appear on the radio a lot, if not, not at all. Though they’re talented all the same.
The Guild are basically the equivalent to K-pop and J-pop, not quite famous in Yokohama, but definitely famous enough to go on tour there.
Atsushi’s arc
There were a few ideas for him (music school was in the draft but I dunked it faster than I pulled it up) but it boils down to one thing: Atsushi accidentally becomes a famous singer from an old video he made when he wasn’t fully into music yet. He, being the oblivious guy he is, suddenly starts gaining fans and is beyond confused yet appreciates it very much.
Though not sure why people are calling him the Beast below The Moonlight (Plot twist, you big stupidhead, that was the title of the old song you made). He goes along with it though, calling himself Moon Tiger, which is so him honestly.
Anyways it’s not Dazai if he doesn’t try to drown himself so while Atsushi’s vibing by the open canal he just sees him. Like canon, Atsushi saves Dazai. But the thing about Atsushi is; he’s camera shy and most of his videos have him covering his face and out of camera view, so Dazai doesn’t immediately recognize him as the famous youtube singer.
As thanks, Dazai treats Atsuhi to dinner with Kunikida, and Dazai has a hunch that Atsushi is Moon Tiger so they start a small convo about it. Atsushi’s all; “ERRRRMMMMMMM” and he wants to leave until:
“Y’know, whoever Moon Tiger is, I’d totally pay a lot of money to hear him sing.” Dazai hums. Kunikida kinda agrees to this, saying how talent like his shouldn’t come totally for free. Atsushi doesn’t ask for donations or get youtube money (because he dunno how :( ) so he’s almost flat broke, and this kinda perks his interest.
“Actually, uh, I kinda know Moon Tiger. I didn’t want to bring it up because I thought you’d ask for autographs or something ha ha. I agree with the paying part.” Atsushi you’re low key greedy ngl, Pre-Bullshit Atsushi was greedy. Money-eyed hoe. “If you want I can get you to meet him, but he won’t wanna show his face so it’s gotta be somewhere he can hide himself while still being able to sing.”
“Done!” Dazai holds his hand out like it’s some sort of deal. “I know a place.”
I’m sorry Dazai, but I’m not smart or sexy as you, so I don’t know the place. Let’s go with the regular canon spot, yeah? And Dazai listens while Atsushi sings behind a big crate and when Atsushi is done, he expects money but he gets a thunderous applause instead and suddenly his identity is revealed and everyone is clapping and staring at him super amazed.
And Atsushi faints from being too overwhelmed. 
Anyways, things happen, some parts are alike to canon, some parts aren’t. Atsushi’s main goal in this AU is to get over his terrible stage fright while simultaneously trying to avoid clashing with Port Mafia, who at first, wants to recruit him before he fully signs the contract with AMA.
I don’t know how battles would work in this, but they happen.
Dazai’s backstory
So my man Dazai amirite?
Not a surprise, he used to be under Port Mafia. At some point he does numerous collabs with free lancer Chuuya because Chuuya’s little sheep band had an issue with copyright with Port Mafia (oops). 
Onto the main course though: Odasaku.
Ango is in charge of Oda and Dazai, who usually does music together because they’re friends (hurray). But Oda had long gave up on doing vocals because his throat just couldn’t handle it, he much prefers writing music and Dazai doesn’t mind because he never has extremely big ideas anyways.
A clash with Mimic happens and Mori’s all: We need more music we need to stay number one. And so -I dunno how- he forces Oda to finally use his voice to sing via Ango’s persuasion.
Oda completely loses his voice in the end, like he completely damaged it, and he can’t handle the music industry anymore so he leaves. And Dazai’s all: “Don’t go please.”
And Oda writes on his phone and holds it out for Dazai, “This agency. It doesn’t care much for music, does it? I used to sing because I liked singing, because there were feelings in it. But slowly this agency stopped me from being able to do that. Dazai. Don’t you think you should sing with feelings too? You’ve never made an opinion on my ideas, is it because you can’t or you won’t?”
And Dazai realizes he only likes doing music because of the people around him, especially Oda, and now that Oda isn’t in Port Mafia anymore, it just isn’t the same. He’s been making music to grab people’s attention and not much because he wanted to. So he decides to change and switches agencies.
(His relationship with Akutagawa is as straining as canon; “I don’t care about how you made this dumb song, it’s not good enough! How will anyone want to listen to this crap?” Now Aku’s music are catchy and all but lacking in meaning.)
Other things
Yosano’s music is pretty rough, but it literally lets all the feelings out, so it becomes pretty nice. So you know that music that cures this and cures that? That’s Yosano’s music, except it’s really hardcore. I don’t know how she does it, she just does.
Kyouka is the daughter of two big music geniuses and is expected to be the same, so she gets an immediate acceptance into Port Mafia and it nearly breaks her until Atsushi meets her. During a concert or something -because in the end, Atsushi’s still the fan boy type- Atsushi goes up to Kyouka and asks if she’s okay and stuff.
“I’ve made 35 songs, but I can’t...hear my own voice, my own music...” Your Lie in April ref do not hunt me please. 
Ranpo is known to have serious in depth meaning behind his music, and a good 20% are just matryoshka songs (he gives out stuff if you find out if his song is an in depth meaning one or just nonsense that somehow speaks meaning while having no theme at all)
Poe’s are somewhat the same as Ranpo, except they’re more like stories to be honest, and his songs get numerous fan interpretation and so far, Ranpo always gets it right. The only one who ever does without missing a beat (ha ha got em.)
Debating if I should just make Kunikida an agent or a music artist that just likes writing songs rather than performing them.
Naomi could be an idol ngl but she’s not, she’s her brother’s number one fan! (She’s a secretary in the agency.)
Chuuya’s more famous for his pretty looks than his music at this point, but it doesn’t mean he’s a shit music artist though.
Higuchi is Aku’s agent.
Kenji’s songs are so happy and go-lucky it makes anyone listening to it feel pumped up. Hence his music are often used in AMVs or sports exercise (what a range!)
Yumeno’s music are those cursed type of songs that weren’t meant to be creepy or weird to begin with (e.g Tonight You Belong To Me, it’s an innocent song yet it can be taken as horror(?)) but end up becoming one anyways.
Dazai’s songs are so sad sometimes but they’re always upbeat. A weird yet perfect balance for his listeners.
That’s all I got! Honestly, don’t really know how to develop The Guild in this, maybe one day I will. 
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gedwimora-arc · 4 years ago
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Naturally, i have to think a lot about Lyarra’s position as eldest daughter / Robb’s heir / Queen in the North and what she would need to do about marriage to both keep her crown and keep the Stark name alive and in power in the North and I did some of that again fdgsdfgfd. 
Negotiating marriage with Lyarra would be a nightmare for a large section of interested parties because unless absolutely truly broken she has two things she will not back down on in a marriage contract: 
1. her spouse will be in a consort role or similar / the marriage will be a completely equal partnership ( with some protections snuck in so he can’t just shove her to the side and rule alone ) 2. she will not bear children who are not Starks in name as well as blood ( this can be somewhat negotiated Maybe if you’re nice but the oldest at minimum must be a Stark )
For most men / houses is this just naturally not a sexy deal and would not go over well but fuck them amirite ? Or not in this case they don’t get royal heirs fdkgjdfs. I’m not sure who would go for it out of the westerosi houses I’m sure there’s a few, especially if they’ve got a second son or something they’re looking to toss somewhere. I imagine the people who’d be most Chill about this would be Free Folk or people from matriarchal or primogeniture cultures like Dorne where her position would be respected as is anyway which would be Interesting politically.
and if the main goal here really is just an heir so people will get off her backs and not say, to solidify her position and alliance, ofc there’s always the good ole “bone a man you can tolerate and won’t start shit and claim your child’s father is your One True Husband, the North Itself and deal harshly with anyone who has a problem with the setup”.
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fourangers · 4 years ago
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Fate and Choices (ch. 02)
Summary: When Naruto discovered who was going to be his soulmate, he jumped straight at this opportunity, looking forward to spending the rest of his life with his better half. Sasuke well…he was less eager in this regard though. NaruSasu. Soulmates tattoos. M-rated.
Content: AU!Office, Romance, Comedy, Drama, it’ll get a little too philosophical in some parts talking about free will Vs fate, basically Sasuke is a cynic ass and Naruto is an idealistic moron (great amirite), Anal Sex, tattoos soulmates
Chapter 01 here
AO3 link
--.--
“Hey! Jackass!”
Sasuke stiffened, bracing himself from the incoming impact.
“Fucking bastard thought you were gonna get rid of me, ‘s not going to be that easy you know!”
Sasuke was rubbing his legs with a wince; good gracious, years have passed and this idiot continued to be the same loudmouth dumbass. He turned back to Neji. “Please fire him.”
Neji blinked. “It’s my company and I’m the one who hired him Sasuke.”
“I know, but I’m saying that you should fire for our sanity’s sake.”
“Wow, that’s so mean.” Naruto grumbled, widening a grin. “You haven’t changed one bit Sasuke. Plus, there’s no way Neji would fire me when I’m the best social media manager you ever met!”
Sasuke rolled his eyes then threw a significant glance towards Neji.
Neji shook his head. “Yes, sorry to say but Naruto is pretty good. He is one of the few I know that can build a good number of followers organically in a short time. I guess you’ll have to deal with it. Just use this opportunity for some catching up ok.” He patted Sasuke’s shoulder and stared at Naruto in deadpan. “Please don’t destroy the office.”
“C’mon Neji, you really think we’re gonna get back to fighting as if we’re twelve? Give me some credit will you.” Naruto’s grin became so wide that it reminded him of a cheshire’s cat.
“...right.” Neji looked around, and picked an antique vase on the way out.
Sasuke stared at Naruto and his winsome beam, then gazed at the door knob.
He turned around.
“Oh? Ignoring me and fleeing again? The coward's obvious choice.”
Turning back with a venomous glare, Sasuke approached Naruto. “Well, I suppose there’s no point delaying any longer. What do you want from me?”
The caustic tone dissolved Naruto’s grin into a frown, so he mumbled. “What the hell did I do wrong for you to act like an asshole around me?”
Sasuke inhaled, taking some seconds to recompose himself as he retorted. “You’re right, my attitude was wholly unneeded, but I can’t help it. I still need to know why on earth you decided to reappear in my life when I made pretty clear that I don’t want you around.”
“Good God, I can’t believe that you don’t want your soulmate after this many years⏤”
“Don’t go there.” Sasuke growled through gritted teeth.
“Ugh, fine.” Naruto rolled his eyes. “You know, after what we’ve been through, I thought that at least you would bother yourself to give me an explanation or at least keep some kind of contact.”
“I can’t believe you took seriously our summer fling.”
Naruto stared, and then quirked an eyebrow. “Three years is not a summer fling.”
“Whatever, but it happened while we were young and stupid, so it is a fling no matter how long it took.” Before Naruto could protest, Sasuke interjected in. “Everything was going fine in my life back when you left me alone in peace, so why did you decide out of nowhere to get back in bothering me again?”
Naruto curled down his mouth, examining Sasuke’s indecipherable face as graphite eyes focused glowering at the ground. He knew that Sasuke wasn’t going to be cheerfully welcoming his return though he expected at least some positive reaction.
Scratching his blond head, Naruto sighed. “Sasuke, back when your parents divorced” He could see Sasuke tensing on the corner of his eye but he continued nevertheless. “I really wished you could rely on me to share your feelings about it but you just decided to throw me out of your life. But I respected that this was your way of coping and later I also get why you did that⏤”
“If you got it, why are you here now?”
Naruto blinked and declared with strong assurance. “Because I’m your soulmate.”
“We only have matching tattoos dumbass, nothing else.”
“Only matchin⏤” Naruto groaned. “Oh c’mon, gimme your hand in case you forgot about it.”
“No.” Sasuke held his hand closer to his chest, dodging away from Naruto’s grasp.
“You stubborn bastard⏤”
“Dumbass, get the fuck away⏤” The young men wrestled in the conference room, stumbling through chairs and knocking down assorted papers and pens.
“Sasuke, goddammit, just for a few seconds, I swear!” Naruto yowled, arms stretched out in a vain attempt to reach Sasuke’s hand.
Sighing, Sasuke lowered his arm. “I’ll humor you for once, I guess.” He raised his palm, showing his moon tattoo.
Naruto broadened a victorious smile, interlacing his tanned fingers with pale ones. When their tattoos touched, a warm ball of light grew till it lit up the whole room, but Sasuke dropped his hand, cutting off its connection.
"You felt that right, once again. That wave of happiness, the comfort, contentment. We complete each other.” Breathing heavily, remnants of those emotions overwhelmed him, soulful blue eyes attempted to reach his soulmate.
Sasuke averted his gaze, crafting a blank expression and shrugged. “I disagree with this. Those feelings are probably some kind of animalistic instinct to preserve our species and I’m beyond all that. Why do people keep claiming that they need to find their other half? I’m already one whole person, I’m against the notion that you need someone else to feel complete.”
Raising his eyebrows impressed, Naruto hummed pensive, conceding. "Alright…that's a very fair point. But no matter how complete you are, you need relationships to sustain yourself. Family, coworkers, friends…we're humans that need other people all the time. And isn't it great that nature gave us this tool to find the best companion that will share his lifetime with you?"
"This system is flawed and imperfect Naruto. You know it as well as I do." Sasuke retorted. "And I'd rather not waste my life blindly relying over something that might fail in the long run."
“You're selling a technology that lets people find their own soulmate.” Naruto muttered incredulously.
“I sell the tool, not the satisfaction nor its promise for happiness." Sasuke offered with a prim sniff, chin raised. "And whatever might be my business, it has nothing to do with my personal opinion, in which is that I'm fine not needing a soulmate."
"Why? I thought we were in agreement back then!"
"Which goes back to the talk that we were just young and naive, that's all. I changed my mind."
“Honestly, why are you going so against it, it’s like one of those obvious laws of nature. It’s inevitable, like…" Naruto paused for a second, trying to come up with valid examples. "Like gravity, physics, and everything like…babies would always cry…um…dogs are angels and cats are evil…”
“How dare you, you take back that last sentence right fucking now.” Sasuke growled.
“Alright, maybe cats are also nice, I’ll let you adopt one when we live together!”
“No, thank you. And for every supposed law of nature, it’s never entirely universal. You can use aerodynamics to fly above gravity, cats can save kids and dogs can bite⏤”
“And babies crying?” Naruto chimed in.
“...tiny baby lizards don’t cry.” Sasuke regretted it the instant he uttered these words, he knew that his IQ would just drop if he’d spend one minute more with this dumbass, Naruto is just this infectious. "That doesn't matter. I thought I came here so I could talk about work, not engaging in those childish conversations that go nowhere."
"...so." Naruto smacked his lips and grinned. "I am your social media manager then."
Sasuke stared and narrowed his eyes. "My company's social media."
"Yeah yeah yeah, whatever. You have my phone number and Line? It's⏤"
“I know your number, I just have to unblock you.”
Sasuke half-expected Naruto bristling in indignation when he got the confirmation that he was indeed, blocking him out over those years. A crestfallen despair flashed through Naruto’s eyes, before blossoming to a warm smile.
“I’m just glad we’re talking again, that’s all that matters.”
Sasuke wanted to tell him that it’s only work related. That it won’t change his mind and once the contract would be over, they would part their respective ways. Caustic, sharp words had to be uttered so he could end this nonsense at last, but somehow it died on his throat when his whole soul ached to reach Naruto’s face and kiss the pained frown away.
Thankfully, a knock from the door broke their stupor, and Naruto opened to meet Neji and some of Sasuke’s coworkers.
“Well, it seems that their meeting is over. Anyways, Hoozuki-sama, Yamato-sama, Uzumaki Naruto-san here will be in charge of Shinrei’s whole social media account, as well as strategy and planning.”
Naruto and Sasuke’s coworkers shook hands and exchanged name cards, bowing politely as they began the meeting. Suigetsu quirked his eyebrow, noticing how Sasuke always averted his gaze whenever he talked with Uzumaki-san, even though the blond man stared as if Sasuke was the only man in the whole room.
Those were intense, covetous azure eyes that somehow weren't much tainted with lust. Curiosity piqued, Suigetsu dragged his friend to the side while Naruto was talking with the other coworker.
“So…from all the interactions I witnessed, it seems that you and that blondie have some history together right. What happened?”
Sasuke glared. “Nothing.”
“Oh c’mon, just tell me! It’s the first time I ever saw you being so nervous around a guy, whatever happened has to be something big.”
Sasuke sighed, shutting his eyes. He uttered in the most bored tone he could muster. “Naruto is my soulmate.”
Suigetsu blinked. “…huh?”
“My soulmate.” Sasuke repeated. “He’s my soulmate.”
“WHAT?!” Suigetsu shouted, switching his gaze back and forth towards Sasuke and Naruto. “You lucky dog, you found your soulmate this easily?! And he’s hot too!”
“He is?” Sasuke furrowed his eyebrows, then turned around for a quick check. No, that’s the usual dumbass, stupid grin Naruto, there’s nothing new about that.
“God, the fact that you don’t want a soulmate makes even less sense now! I want a hottie like him riding me till tomorrow for the rest of my life.” Suigetsu noticed the black eyebrow twitching in annoyance and curled a saucy grin. “I better get first in line if he’s interested.”
“Whatever suits you best.” Sasuke grumbled, as they all moved back to the entrance, as the meeting was over.
Someone poked his shoulder. “Hey hey. Sasuke.” He turned his face, glare activated but halted at once when he felt moist lips touching his skin. “Have a nice day.” Naruto beamed.
He furiously rubbed his cheek with his hand, growling. “I’m going to kill you.”
“So testy, I just gave you one innocent peck on your cheek.” Laughing, Naruto patted his back while he returned to the office.
Neji observed the grin that stretched from ear to ear and muttered. “Oh dear me. It’s been a while since I saw you smiling this much.”
“Well, duh. Obviously.”
“Hm. You’re satisfied with the arrangement then?”
“Yeah! Thanks for everything Neji.”
“Likewise. I hope whatever conclusion you two will reach, it’ll be satisfactory to you both.” Pearly eyes peered in earnest intensity, so Naruto offered a half-grin back. “But I would like to remind you that Sasuke is our client, right.”
“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” Naruto appeased him.
“Don’t go too far.”
“I won’t!”
“Please don’t annoy Sasuke too much, okay.”
There was a long silence and then. “Uh. Sure!”
Is it too late to change his own mind; Neji wondered with a sigh.
⏤.⏤
Six hundred, forty three. That’s the number of times Sasuke had to suppress the urge to throw Suigetsu out of the car, whenever his friend nagged wanting to know more details about Naruto.
He hoped once he arrived in his office, all this nonsense would be over so he could concentrate on his work. Promising gruesome bloody murder if Suigetsu ever dared to gossip about his love life, he strode to Itachi’s room.
“Nii-san.”
“Oh, welcome back otouto-kun. How was the meeting? How is Neji-kun?” Itachi acknowledged him with a quick nod, eyes still focused on the laptop.
“Neji is fine, his marketing plan is really well planned and he is just going to make us cover the basic costs, nothing else.” Sasuke paced around, and said. “Nii-san, you won’t believe who is going to take care of our social media.”
“Oh, Neji told me. I’ve heard that he’s a really bright, young man…” Itachi raised his eyes to meet with Sasuke’s, a knowing beam broadening his lips. “Blond, blue eyes, who has an exquisite sun tattoo that fits with your moon tattoo pretty perfectly…”
“What the f⏤!” Sasuke tamped down the urge to scream, throwing his hands to the air. “I can’t believe you all! You, Neji and Naruto all planned this?! I can’t believe that you would betray me. You’re my brother!”
“And as your older brother, I agreed with Neji-kun that you avoiding Naruto-kun is damaging you in the long run, but considering your stubbornness I thought that it’d be better if I nudged a little in the right direction.”
“Unbelievable. I thought that you, of all people, understood me the best considering the experience we suffered with mother and father.”
Sighing, Itachi stilled in commiseration, picking his tea cup. He sipped the warm beverage, murmuring. “I considered these memories for a long time, but I concluded that I shouldn’t let them deter my life. It’s specifically because of them that I’m determined to find the perfect companionship with my soulmate.”
Sasuke scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, big words from someone who didn’t bother himself to find his own soulmate. You know really well that he or she lives in the Netherlands but you kept delaying buying the plane ticket.”
“…I have…other priorities for now.”  Itachi argued with a clipped tone.
“No, you just share the same trauma as I do but since it’s not your problem, you thought you could manipulate however you liked about my own life. It is your loss though, because even if our parents’ divorce may had influenced my opinion about Soulmates, I have valid reasons to reject it.” Sasuke declared, tightening his hands into a fist. “I’ll do this damn job with Naruto just to prove you, and then we’ll go on our own goddamn different paths. Just you wait.”
“…” Itachi studied his younger brother’s agitated state, eyebrows knitted, resolute.
Honestly, Sasuke had already grown old enough to be in any need of his guidance, but above all, he wasn’t really accepting any of it even if Itachi tried to drill any word in his hard-headed mind. From now on he guessed he’d leave it up to Naruto, and he hoped the young man would have enough patience handling his younger brother.
⏤.⏤
Naruto was being…strange. At first, Sasuke expected that the dumbass would use the opportunity that he unblocked his contact to flirt with him, or engage inane conversation or send dick pics. The blond man was oddly very considerate nevertheless, using their chats for strict professional subjects, not one thing out of line.
On the other hand, they had a lot of physical meetings. At first it was only once per week, not arousing his suspicion as Sasuke considered that Naruto probably had a lot of questions that it’d be better clarified with these kinds of meetings. The following week they had twice per week and then thrice. Also, whatever professional courtesy Naruto had respected in chats, was thrown out of the window when he saw Sasuke, trying to start off-topic conversations, sitting really close to him and generally being a pain in the ass.
(Sasuke didn’t want to admit that he was enjoying those meetings)
When Naruto called, ready to schedule another meeting, Sasuke rebutted. “A meeting? Online meeting, you meant.”
“Oh no, like a meeting, meeting. As in, me going to your office or you going to mine and…”
“For someone who only uses online tools for your everyday work, you oddly prefer a face to face meeting for no particular reason.”
“What can I say, I’m a people’s person after all.” Naruto chuckled. “Well, if you’re too busy we can reschedule if you want.”
Sasuke narrowed his eyes. This really felt like some sort of measured chess game, when one man was carefully choosing which pieces to sacrifice or to keep it alive. He expected that since Naruto was so impatient he’d prefer a direct approach instead of slowly luring him in.
“Then again, I haven’t seen him for over seven years, who knows how much he had changed since then.”
⏤.⏤  
UGH.
This is so fucking hard.
What Naruto really wanted was to drag Sasuke to some secluded room and have his way until they were both satisfied. But nope, that stupid ass bastard is just too stubborn and suspicious of everything that if he did any sudden move, Naruto was afraid that Sasuke would disappear to some far away country, like Canada or Argentina or something like that.
Was he asking for too much in wanting to have his soulmate back? Was he? He just wanted life to be easier for once. Stupid Sasuke. Why. Uuuuugh. Now Sasuke was already getting suspicious that they were having way too many meetings and Naruto wanted at least some compensation for using all his remaining patience to let Sasuke dictate this fucking slower than slug pace.
He heard the familiar ping, unlocking his phone.
Sorry, just finished a meeting now. I’m going to arrive 15 minutes late.
Oooooh?
Grinning, Naruto noticed Sasuke typing some response but he was quicker.
Uchiha-sama is going to be late? My eyes didn’t deceive me just now, did I really read that?
Moron.
Naruto laughed, thankful that his typing speed was faster than Sasuke’s. I mean, Uchiha Sasuke-sama is actually going to be late for the first time in his life. Wow, it’s going to rain knives today.
It’s not my fault dumbass, the sponsor I was talking with wanted more details about my software. And he’s an old man it was difficult to explain in layman terms.
Ah, yeah…sounds tough. Don’t worry about it, I can wait while I’m working. Thanks for the heads up.
Sasuke snorted, relaxing his shoulders on the taxi seat while he stared at the buildings passing by. Opening a new company was so hard, so many people to visit, so many potential sponsors and clients to sell your product. There were also many annoying obligations to register your company and documentation to smooth things through too. His father gave enough initial investments to help them open the business but aside that, they were really green, unsure what steps to proceed in a shrewd market.
Thanks to Naruto’s strategies their brand is getting recognition between specialists for now, some well-known influencers tested their technology, aiding him to show tangible successes in the effort to convince people. But although they were impressed, few signed the deed, not wanting to risk their precious capital over an infant company.
Exhaling a tired breath, he went to the conference room after he greeted Neji. The moment he opened the door, he immediately picked the nice fragrance of fresh cooked rice.
“Hey. I’m just gonna finish retouching some reports and we’ll start the meeting right away.” Naruto said.
In front of him laid a neat porcelain plate with three onigiris, then a tomato salad inside a plastic package and even Caramel dark chocolate from a fancy brand.
“Oh yeah, feel free to dig in, I bought this for you.”
At this admission his stomach growled and Sasuke licked his lips. “How did you know I was hungry?” Sharp graphite eyes narrowed.
“Well…if I’m not mistaken, you usually eat around 12:30 or something right? Unless you changed your habit, I mean. But it’s already 1 pm, and you didn’t mention stopping a little to eat lunch, so I thought it would be best if I bought something for you.”
…Naruto still remembered all his favorite foods. Warm beats expanded in his chest and Sasuke forcibly tamped it down. This is just residual instinct caused by this soulmating system, it had nothing to do with his feelings. He savored each bite in silence while Naruto gave the monthly report.
Hmph. Dumbass.
--.--
Chapter 03
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eddisfargo · 4 years ago
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CoMC Chapter 96
CHAPTER 96
The Contract
27 minutes
So this one doesn’t get really interesting until the end, and tbh I’ve read the next chapter too and am significantly more excited about that one, but I will try to do this one justice. 
Anyway, Andrea interrupts MC on his way out to come and chat. He’s like “let’s go out and talk!” and MC’s like “nah I don’t actually want to be seen with you, come on in.” 
Turns out the question is, “Since my ‘father’ can’t make it to my wedding, will you give me away, [Dad]??” 
And MC’s like “Awwww, absolutely not and I’m appalled by the suggestion. I’m an Eastern type of dude and don’t do the wedding thing, even if you were my brother or my son. But you’re actually just some guy I barely know.”
And Andrea’s like “right, got it. We’re ;) strangers. Anyway, I’m super rich and Danglars is super rich right?” MC’s like “Oh goodness yes, Danglars is SO VERY rich. I definitely haven’t been actively ruining him for months and he’s certainly not on his last legs financially. In fact he’s due to get richer and richer and take you with him, I’m sure.” 
So Andrea leaves with a press of MC’s hand and MC almost vomits, and we head to THE BETROTHAL. Man have betrothals had bad luck in this book, btw. We’ve had the obvious disaster that was the impetus for the entire rest of the book, Villefort’s was interrupted too and he paused the proceedings to decide if he could do better, Albert got his proposal rejected entirely, Franz’s was interrupted by it turning out that his GFIL killed his dad… and now THIS disaster. Specifically the third to be interrupted by the police, I think. 
Turns out MC just “found” a piece of paper that he definitely didn’t force Caderousse to write at knifepoint. He hasn’t read it (nor dictated it definitely how ridiculous), he just gave it to Law Enforcement (aka Villefort). Benedrea (why do I only come up with these names the last time I get to say them?) hears about the paper and quietly begins to peace out. Danglars apparently had no idea that the dead burglar was Cadarousse, a witness to his own worst crime, btw, until right now. I also like how upon hearing about a bloody garment with a knife hole in it, women at the party actually SCREAM and “prepare to faint.” Hah, womans, amirite? 
But the coppers come and tell the truth about Benny! At least, part of the truth--the part where he’s a convict/galley slave under an assumed name and a robber and a murderer. Funnily enough, the fact that he and his fiance share a whole set of grandparents never becomes relevant. What even was the point of doing that, then?? The only person discomfited by that little ploy is the reader. 
Anyway, that’s that for that, I guess!
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dealersdencantina · 5 years ago
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Jedi Knight story realy doesn’t mesh well with the planetary stories.
ESPECIALLY on Tatooine. I mean, you’re on a short time table to find this machine that could shatter the core of the planet, and you’re expected to find an old Rakatan device?
Nope.
Same thing goes for Alderaan. You gotta stop the Death Mark ray from killing people and the sadistic Sith that has it? You don’t have time to fix what is essentially petty squables between the warring houses.
So pretty much the whole first chapter of the Jedi Knight class story, for my girl anyway, is JUST THAT. Stopping Angral from getting these planet destroying weapons.
I know there’s supposed to be days, even weeks, between objectives, but even then, you’re still on one hell of a time table. You have to use your resources to find that Sith and stop him and shut down the laser for good. Stopping the Usurper is just…a waste of time.
Most of the class stories have that urgency, but there’s a few that can sway it better.
My Bounty Hunter, for instance, just sees many of these as extra contracts. You help, you make money. You bring the head of someone, hey, you get paid!! All the while you trace clues to your targets whereabouts (she has Mako on comms while she and Gault travel the planet, so finding the target is quicker than it’d be normally) and you then you find them. All in a days work!!
My Smuggler’s just “lucky.” :P She wants extra pay as well.
But the Jedi? Too much at stake. For the greater good, amirite?
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milkhwi · 6 years ago
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vampire! jaemin
summary: basically humans are trained to sneakily kill vampires one by one but you, accidentally fell in love with one
genre: fluff, angst, (minor) mentions of blood, cutting, and death??
a/n: first part of the vampire series collab with @jaaebear !1!1! also i died for a while
masterlist.
~
humans and vampires either get along or end up killing eachother
as one of the best vampire killers, you were obviously gonna be assigned to kill one of the most dangerous vampires
na jaemin, known to be able to flirt his wat out of a situation, or manipulate them
humans obviously have tried to track him down and killed him but failed because he’s too fast of a vampire
or also gone through a ‘contract’ meaning working together and eventually jaemin ending up taking their blood in less than a month since he doesn’t want other humans or humans knowing about this
vampires are set in 5 types of ranks, jaemin being in number 2 which is fairly powerful at his age
anyways you got called for a meeting with a few people with your organization
“hey uh y/n,, we got a new assignment for you,, we want you to eliminate na jaemin, rank 2 vampire”
and you’re like !! oooo a strong vampire??? it’s gonna be easy
so you tell renjun, your best friend “guess who got assigned to kill a rank 2!”
and he’s so proud of you because getting assigned to kill a high category vampire is a big accomplishment
so you start planning and tracking down jaemin,, you try to have a big distance between him since he can smell human blood around him
you see a few humans he meets up and you write all of this since it’s useful information for your organization
it’s been around 2 weeks and you found out that he’s meeting with a few high ranked vampires and humans in a fancy restaurant
so before that day, you make a reservation and planted hearing devices to see what his plan is
in order to not look suspicious you drag renjun along
“i don’t get why i have to go?? couldn’t you just go in as a waitress??” - renjun
“uH no i’ll look even mOrE suspicious like in those movies” - you
“i- you- you know those are movies right?”
“shut up and hurry up we’re gonna be late”
so you get there and sit a few seats far from him and you notice that jaemin looks really handsome young for a vampire
so then you just try to get as much intel as you can from their conversation and renjun notices that jaemin’s eyes are slowly turning dark red,, meaning he needs human blood in order to regain strength
you think it’s the perfect timing of eliminating him
after a while slowly a few people leave from his table leaving him with two vampires and renjun forgot he had to meet up jeno so he had to leave
since there were hardly any people you decided to have a tiny cut around your finger in order to make jaemin want blood
jaemin obviously, able to smell the blood dripping, immediately told both of the vampires to leave
after 3 minutes you left and he decided to quietly follow you
so, you immediately saw jaemin’s dark red eyes and pointed a gun towards him
“don’t move, na jaemin”
“let’s make a contract, y/n”
“how do you even know my name?”
“you think you were sneaky enough? please, you’re lucky you haven’t died yet”
“na jaemin, what do you want from me? those contracts won’t even last more than a month”
“listen, i can give you anything if you give me your blood”
you scoffed, “shouldn’t you feel lucky? i haven’t pulled the trigger yet”
even though he was getting weaker he took your gun and pinned you down saying, “if you don’t want to die, let’s make the contract”
you sighed, giving in since you can definitely poison him before he can kill you
jaemin and you would meet up in a few shady streets or he would go into your house eventually he forgot he was having a contract with you and slowly started falling for you
“y/n,,, you’re telling mE,, that you’re falling for a vampire???” - renjun
“yeah,,, is that wrong?”
“oH my- i don’t know?? i’ll keep it a secret but what if he murders you??”
“i- uh- you’re right i’ll talk to him today”
later jaemin decided to meet up at your house
you stood there by the window thinking about it not even noticing that jaemin was there staring at you
“y/n~ are you thinking about me???”
you jumped at jaemin’s voice and shook your head trying not to blush
you sighed and said, “can we uh, talk”
jaemin got worried since he hasn’t seen you like that from the start of the contract
“i want to end the contract” - you
“y/n?? why?? did i do something wrong??”
“n-no it’s just,, i just, i fell in love with you”
and at that moment you felt his lips on you another way of death amirite
his lips were sweet and he tried to be careful since he had fangs
after what felt like forever, he finally parted and smiled, “and i fell in love with you too”
aNyways, both of you decided to secretly date and your organization found out but were fine as long as he didn’t mess with them
jaemin always has to be careful when he wants to kiss you since he doesn’t want to end up biting you
“jaemin won’t i die first since you’re a vampire?”
“i’ll make you into a vampire so we can be together for a really long time”
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