#were the first to fall in love in a world full of death and betrayal. the canary and the stars above. the one who on average performs worst

[the-somwthing]

[ someone saying flower husbands was toxic in an analysis of Jimmy ] boo ur wrong 🙄

[ someone saying flower husbands was toxic in an analysis of Scott ] OMG!! SO TRUE 😭

[anakinstwinklebunny]

mafia anakin being so tough and cruel to everyone but once he step to the house and you meet him with a warm smile he turn into a puddy in your hands (sorry for my bad English)

The Softness of Power

TW: none!! Just fluff cause I need fluff to live.

Author's note: of course love! This is a safe space, I don't judge your language abilities ;) tysm for the request, hope you'll enjoy it!

The heavy mahogany door creaked open, and ANAKIN SKYWALKER stepped into the dimly lit hallway of his mansion. Outside, he was feared—the Mafia King, ruthless and cold. His name alone sent chills through the spines of anyone who dared to cross him

He had just come from a 'meeting' that ended with blood on his hands and he swore the weight of decisions still lingered in his mind. Because for Anakin, when it came to business, everything was expected to be perfect. No mistakes, no betrayal - because if, there will always be a punishment. Now, hours later, his jaw was still clenched, shoulders tight and every muscle coiled with lethal tension.

Yet the moment his eyes found you standing at the other end of the hall, bathed in the warm glow of a flickering fireplace, everything changed. Your smile, so genuine and unguarded, softened the hard lines of his face. You stood there like an angel, wearing one of his (for you) oversized shirts, your feet bare on the cold marble floor.

"You're home," you stated softly with voice nothing but gentle

He just exhaled, as if it alone was enough of a response while he quickly took off his shoes and, without caring about his outdoors clothes, made his way to you. The coldness in his eyes was no longer there, replaced by something much more tender. He reached for you, hands that had once delivered death now seeking warmth, gentleness - something he knew you could provide. His large frame towered over you, but in your presence, he was no longer the Mafia king—just a man. Your man.

As you wrapped your arms around his neck, you felt his face dipping into the crook of your neck. He squeezed you in his arms, grasping you almost in fear as if you were about to leave - like everyone else "You have no idea how much I need this," he muttered into your skin, voice gravelly yet filled with vulnerability he didn't dare to show anyone yet you

You moved your hands up to the back of his head to ran your fingers through his tousled hair. Your lips pressed a soft kiss to the base of his ear. "Rough day?"

"You could say that," the darkness of his world still lingering in his tone. But with you, that darkness began to slowly fade. You were the light he didn’t deserve yet so desperately needed. As if without you, his being didn't make sense, wasn't full filed

“Come on,” you whispered, tugging now at his hand towards the couch. “Let me take care of you.”

He followed without protest, the fierce, commanding man from earlier gone, replaced by someone who only craved your touch, your softness. You guided him to sit, and he collapsed onto the couch, his head falling back, eyes closing

You straddled his lap and your hands moved to unbutton his shirt, revealing the firm planes of his chest. His breath hitched when your hands glided over his skin, tracing the familiar lines of his body. You could see the flicker of desire in his eyes, but it wasn’t just lust—it was need. The need to be grounded, to feel something real amidst the chaos of his life.

“You don’t have to be strong here,” you murmured, pressing a kiss to his lips—soft at first, but deepening as his hands found your waist, holding you like you were his lifeline.

“You always make me feel so...” he murmured after your lips separated

“So what?” your lips brushed against his as you spoke.

“Like I’m not a monster"

Your heart clenched at his words. To the rest of the world, yes, Anakin was terrifying, unyielding. Something to be scared of. He was like a wild, dangerous animal that always bites. But to you, he was more than that. He was the man who would press gentle kisses to your forehead after a long day, who would give you everything you want. The man who held you close in the quiet moments of the night, the man who loved you fiercely despite his brokenness.

“You’re the only good thing in my life,” he murmured, his breath warm against your lips. “You’re the only one who makes me feel... whole..safe”

You smiled softly, kissing him again, slow and deep, as if to remind him of everything good, everything pure that existed between you. His hands roamed up your back, pulling you even closer, and in that moment, the world outside didn’t matter. The violence, the bloodshed, the power—it all faded away.

Here, in your arms, ANAKIN SKYWALKER wasn’t the Mafia king. He wasn’t a man feared by everyone around him. He was yours, and with you, he could be vulnerable. He could be soft.

And as you held him, whispering sweet nothings in his ear, you knew that no matter how dark his world became, he would always come back to you. You were his sanctuary, his safe haven, and in your arms, even the most dangerous man in the city could find peace.

“You’re everything I need,” he whispered, his voice hoarse as he pressed a final kiss to your lips. “And I’ll never let you go.”

You smiled against his mouth, your fingers threading through his hair, and for the rest of the night, Anakin let himself be exposed—let himself be loved again.

Because with you, the king could finally let down his crown.

TAG LIST: @kingdomhate @divineani @haydensprettyprincess @mistress-amidala @catnipaddictt @heartscone @haydensbbg @inneedsoffanfics @jediavengers @literally-izzy @anisluvrgirl @slutforfinnickodair @xhunnybeeex @fuckmyskywalker @gallerygourmet @bimbo-baggins17

(if you want to be removed or added then don't be shy and let me know 💋)

[reareaotaku]

Yandere! Daenerys Targaryen Headcanons

I've never watched Game of Thrones [GOT] so I'm sorry if this is OOC, but just know I tried my best. [I know a little bit about her from Tiktok Edits]

From the moment she saw you, she was enchanted and had to have you

She'll approach you bold and confident, hoping to catch not only your eye but maybe your hand as well

She doesn't care where you're from, even if you're a White Walker, she will take you and engrave you into the House of Targaryen

^ Her brother will see it as a betrayal, but she's quick to hush him up, saying he knows nothing of love

Loves when you call her Dany/Dannie, it makes her feel warm and special inside

Will braid your hair, telling you it's part of a tradition, whenever you win a tournament and battle, under the guise that it's easier for her to braid it

Would love if you braid her hair after winning a fight

It makes her feel closer to you and you're sharing a special moment

She hums to you while she braids it

Mostly lullabies

She turns you around when she's done braiding and looks at your face. She'll slowly caress your cheek, before putting some baby hairs behind your ear

^ She looks at you like you're the only person in the world

And to her, you are

Will take you riding on her dragons

At first you were scared, but she's quick to console you and tell you it'll be fine

God, she loves when you squeeze her tightly in fear of falling

Every rejection you send her way just makes her more determined

She's protective over you. If anyone dares threaten you, she will kill them. How dare they try and threaten the love of her life? They were asking for death

She would do anything for you, all you have to do is ask. You want a specific food? Well, she'll travel across the world to get it for you

Sometimes she doesn't think about her actions in full and can end up accidentally hurting you

In those moments, she becomes frustrated at herself for hurting you. She becomes angry and will profusely apologize

Speaking of anger, whenever she does become angry, especially when it's because she hurt you, someone always gets hurt. She has to hurt someone else to replace the feeling of guilt and shame from hurting you. She doesn't care who, just anyone besides you. Maybe even someone you dislike?

[cauli-is-awake]

life series theorising (spoilers ahead beware)

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

i like lore and was bored so i compiled this neat lil theory about the life series'.

the main thought in this is, what if it was meant to end with secret life?

and that's why it was so different from the other series before? it was meant to be a big dramatic finale from the watchers and it got fucked up by the players still, and that's why we have wild life -where the watchers are angry and have completely let loose- .

think about it, the really obvious watcher reference in the secret keeper, no more mystery and controlling the games ominously from the shadows, they were directly "we are in control and doing this to you". the tasks getting harder and building up to the final "win secret life" it's so much an order than any other finale:

third life "there can only be one winner" -grian desperately wants to remain in his desert peacefully with scar but is forced to give it up to make it so there is only one winner as the watchers intended. even his jump of the cliff is an act of defiance, killing himself on his terms.

last life "i've spent all season being honourable, im not about to stop now" -scott isn't in a bloodlust like many other players, he is defying the watchers, not by living on peacefully (for he knows that isn't possible) but by having a fair match, being honest and never betraying allies and ending it in a similar fashion, the watchers are furious and strike him down for defying them, vowing to end this treachery.

double life "tilly death do us part" -pearl is given the win by scott. in lore you cant tell me that wasn't purposeful a pairing, and after sessions and sessions of fighting it all comes to an end with scott's sacrifice (already going against the watchers in not going with his soulmate and again by killing himself). the watchers are hoping, WAITING for this full scale fight that never happened. and the worst part is, PEARL FORGAVE HIM. they made up. the watchers are fucking pissedddd.

limited life "this is a death match for a reason" -martyn in the watchers grasps is common is lim life fics, and it leans into that build up of wanting control and watching players thwart it every time, so they full on possess a player and make him win the way they want, with betrayal and violence (even better the players were trying to organise another "fair fight" between the final three). They brought back the boogie, maybe that was there anger festering and they had to cause more chaos and bloodshed and on such short notice just borrowed from Last life? Even the life gimmick of lim life kinda feels like a hint at the near end, time is counting down like the watchers patience and willingness to play, once the countdown (limlife) is over, the finale begins. This time the game ends as the watchers want BECAUSE they interfered, proving to themselves they still control the games.

then we get to secret life and everything is meant to end:

jimmy isn't the first to die (canary curse)

scotts alliance breaks apart (his loyalty is finally tested)

a substantial amount of murder from non reds (boogey apocalypse)

in secret life everything changes

BUT IT DIDNT (dun dun dun)

LIZZIE DIED FIRST BUT WAS STUCK IN THE VOID, CANARY CURSE CONTINUES

GEM AND THE SCOTTS FALL APART IN THE BOOGEY APOCALYPSE BUT SCOTT IS STILL LOYAL AND LAYS DOWN HIS LIFE FOR GEM

AND PEOPLE SURVIVE THE BOOGEY APOCALYPSE, SO THE TASK FAILS

(i could draw more differences but this is enough example for me)

so their big dramatic finale failed

maybe that's why scar lived?

the watchers forgot him in the secret life world in their rage

UNTIL WILDLIFE:

when they are throwing everything at them possible (WILDNESS)

(atleast this time it seems to be working if mumbo's death is anything to go by)

thanks for listening to my yapping ^-^

i love drawing silly conclusions from the series

[platoniccereal]

some thoughts on the summer event, pt. 2

if durin looked at the star and then it appeared to be the same object as a lamp that miners had, it obviously shows how vertical simulanka is due to it being a book – but would it imply teyvat has a similar structure?

durin and wanderer were both children with gentle hearts, they were full of love, but simulanca durin didn't hurt anyone, really, yet in the real world blood was shed, and so many mistakes and regrets gained. and wanderer is removed so far away from that self who wanted to make friends and be happy.

also, both durin and wanderer hate their bodies for not letting them blend in society, and for both their real names are so important (yet wanderer never had a real name to remember, and i think this is why durin's story hurts him more). they're so trans. yes, i just called a dragon trans.

wanderer grew peaceful enough to not be so self-destructive, and he doesn't want durin to go through the same "i wish i've never been born at all" experience. :(

it's very telling his reaction to the goddess' death is to call it a betrayal, even though i doubt durin thinks he was betrayed. wanderer, you're projecting a bit too diligently.

simulanka durin had a loving and caring mother who watched over him even after her passing away, yet wanderer's never seen care in all the centuries she was alive and all those years she was out of the euthymia.

wanderer's another paimon's father and he teaches her to be more independent, heh.

paimon thinks wanderer is a friend, too, because she calls durin Another flying friend. :3

poor wanderer got an aneurysm saving everyone multiple times.

"just don't fall behind" oh wanderer? 🤨 so when there are two pretty girls and not just aether you don't say "keep your pretty eyes open"?🤨🤨🤨

can that squirrel be a parallel to the nameless child?

everyone cast their spell with their hands and he did it with his HEART HDHVSSYAU.

my wanderer is named "sunshine" so first he canonically called aether sunshine, and then aether called him sunshine TOO, and i think i was killed with a sniper rifle.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hello again Steph! I actually love long fics and especially series. I wanted to know whether you could suggest me some. Feels like an addict though 😅 whenever I complete a series or a particularly long fic, it fills me with a longing. I don't know how to manage these all.😐

Hi Lovely!!!!

First off, I know you sent this like MONTHS (maybe a year?) ago, and I apologize because I saw this ask, and went "CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!!" not realizing the SCOPE of what I just did to myself, LOL.

To start light, I've a TONNE of long fics, which you can check out on these lists below:

Single Chapter Fics Over 20K

Novella Length Fics: 20 to 25K (Oct 2020)

Novella Length Fics: 25 to 50K (Aug. 2019)

Novella Length Fics: 25 to 50K Pt 2 (July 2022)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K (Nov. 2018)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K Pt 2 (May 2020)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K Pt 3 (Jul 2022)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K Pt 4 (Mar 2024)

Novel Length Fics: 100K+ w. (May 2019)

Novel Length Fics: 100K+ w. Pt 2 (Aug 2020)

Novel Length Fics: 100K+ w. Pt 3 [MFL’s] (Dec 2020)

Long Domestic Johnlock (50K+ w.) (March 2023)

Novel-Length, Not-So-Angsty Recs for Newbies

Now for the challenge! I went through ALL my bookmarks, pulled all the fics that are part of series, and then made NEW entries specifically for Series of Fics, and I am currently putting together the MONSTER list that will be the MFL list.

This is what took so long!! I had to RE-FILE all my bookmarks that were part of series,

All the series on this list have fics I have read in them, but NOT NECESSARILY read the entire series, so take that as you will. And another heads up, in these entries below, when I mark "Series WiP" that ONLY means that the series was marked as incomplete on the Works page, chances are all the stories in the series are complete and can still be read in full.

AND FINALLY, because you asked for "Long fics" (and because I have too many links on this post to post it), I pulled out all the fic series that, as whole, jumped over 50K so you have endless hours of series goodness! So.... Enjoy???

Note, I'll be posting the short-series list next week, and as always, if you have a series you want to share, let me know and I'll add it to the monster MFL list I'm putting together. This list is ONLY for bookmarked series and will NOT be added to!!! Sorry!!!

Hope y'all enjoy!

====

FIC SERIES Pt 1: Bookmarked Full & Oneshot Series Over 50K

The Pieces that Fall to Earth Series by Itsallfine (M, 50,188+ w. across 2 works || Series WIP || Post-S4, Epistolary, Slow Burn, Parentlock, Family, Coming Out, Questioning Sexuality, Love Confessions, Implied Alcohol Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Internalized Homophobia, Developing Relationship, Past Abuse,, Happy Endings, Fluff) – John and Sherlock have hit rock bottom, but with all their armor stripped away, they can finally speak honestly, seek healing, and find the truths that matter most.

The Homecoming Series by sussexbound (M, 51,744 w. across 12 stories, WIP || Domestics, PTSD, Love Confessions, Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling, Jealousy, Family Issues) – Sometimes home is all you need. After three years of horror, betrayals, and crushing loss, John and Sherlock find their way back home to one another, and together find new footing in a world that has changed forever.

When to Let Go Series by KendylGirl (M, 55,248+ w. across 6 works || Series WiP || S1/S2 Compliant, Reverse Reichenbach, Angst, Friendship/Love, Friends to Lovers, Sacrifice, Forgiveness, References to Torture, Bed Sharing, Regret, Grief/Mourning, Loss, Undercover Missions, Mutual Pining, Fluff and Humour, Romance, Violence, Protective Johnlock, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship) – What if it were John who had to die to thwart Moriarty's plans? John's supposed death shatters Sherlock, and when he returns, it will challenge the pair to forge a path of forgiveness, to peace, and to find a way back to each other.

Lock and Key Series by 221b_hound (E, 59,509+ w. across 14 works || Series WiP || Post-HLV, Tattoos, First Kiss/Time, Anal, Hand Jobs, Captain John, Cuddling, Sherlock's Scars, Possessive Johnlock, Exhibitionism / Voyeurism, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Masturbation, Sherlock in Panties, PWP, Dirty Talk, Sexual Fantasies, Restraints, Photographs, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light BDSM, Assorted Kinks, Sherlock in a Sheet, Sex on Furniture, Domestic Fluff) – John has been back at Baker Street for a year, following the debacle that ended in Mary's death. Things are good. Back almost to what they used to be. Sherlock might wish they were something else, now, but he only has himself to blame, he thinks. It's too late, now, for the things he first denied before he'd ruined any chances he might have had. Sherlock also thinks that people who get tattoos are idiots. But perhaps he's about to learn a thing or two, not least of which might be it's not as late as he thinks it is.

Earthly Pomp (Is But a Dream) Series by LoloLolly (M, 60,806+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Post S4, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Aftermath of Serbia, Alternating POV, Scars, Love Confessions, Family, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Angst, Whump, Sherlock's Past, Parentlock) – Sherlock had buried the past. Shut Serbia away in the attic of his mind palace. Muddy footprints at a heinous crime scene, however, have led him right back to old enemies. And right back to captivity. For God’s sake, Mycroft.

SpaceBois go to Space Series by elldotsee (E, 62,028+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Astronaut / Space AU || Scientist Sherlock, Biomedical Engineer John, Sherlock is William, Astronauts, Close Quarters, Shy Sherlock, Space Travel, Mutual Pining, Chemistry, Developing Relationship, Minor Injuries, Suicidal Ideation, Whump, Flirting, Angst with Happy Ending, Mars Colonization, Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, Zero-Gravity Sex, Alternating POV, UST/URT) – Will Holmes is a chemical researcher recognized widely for his contributions to the new Mars exploration program. Thanks to his ground-breaking developments, the IMMC (International Mars Mission Corporation) is one step closer to Martian colonization. Will and his team of scientists are headed out on the first of three manned missions before the first group of settlers arrive. Three days before launch, one of the crew has to be replaced. Will panics because...new people. The replacement is of course one John Watson, biomedical engineer and space hottie who was pretty sure he had retired from actual space exploration and was now content to work in the nice, quiet research lab. Can the crew survive this TOTALLY ROUTINE trip? Will they be able to endure each other for the looooooong trip in close quarters?

An Experiment in Empathy Series by belovedmuerto (T, 62,397 w. across 13 stories || Empath AU || Psychic John, Psychic-by-Proxy Sherlock, Empathy, Psychic Bond, Romance / Bromance) – In which John is an empath, Sherlock is Sherlock, and an epic bromance happens. In the aftermath of The Great Game, John creates an unexpected bond between himself and Sherlock. Now they have to learn how to deal with it. John is better at this than Sherlock is.

Doctors and detectives Series by PlainJane (E, 63,302+ w. across 5 works || Series WiP || Omegaverse || Sex Therapist John, Virgin Sherlock, Alpha Sherlock, Omega John, Anal/Oral Sex, Frottage, Bonding, Hand Jobs, Mpreg, Miscarriage, Mating Cycles/Heats, Mourning, Childbirth Trauma, Angst, OMCs, Happy Ending, Unplanned Pregnancy, Dildos, Anal Fingering, Social Issues, Babysitting) – Sherlock is a young alpha with an aversion to his cycle. John is a gender medicine specialist. Nothing could possibly go wrong...

Nitroglycerine Series by TSylvestris (E, 64,108+ w. across 2 works || Series WiP || Case Fic, Meddling Mycroft, Developing Relationship, Drama, Romance, Humour, Oral / Anal Sex, Fingering, Hand Jobs, Light Mystrade) – The problem with living with Sherlock, John thought, was that you never, never, ever knew the significance of anything. Like your flatmate's nose buried in your hair. Whilst you're in bed.

Bedtime Universe by Liketheriver (M, 65,173 w. across 2 stories || Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Angst, Humour, Case Fic) – John's POV during Season 2 and beyond when Sherlock takes up semi-permanent residence in his bed. A collection of codas and missing scenes wrapped up into one long fic and topped with a bow that takes the story beyond Reichenbach and into happy territory once more. 

Watches 'Verse by bendingsignpost (E, 66,905 w. across 2 works || Magical Realism, Reality Distortion, Angst, Partial MCD, BAMF John) – First, he is shot in Afghanistan. Second, he wakes to a phone call in Chelmsford, Essex. Third is pain, fourth is normalcy, fifth is agony and sixth is confusion. By the eighth, he's lost track. (John-centric AU) 

things fairy tales are made of Series by darcylindbergh (E, 67,761 w. across 7 works || Ficlet Collections, Fluff and Angst, Christmas, First Kiss / Time, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Engagement, Banter, Blow Jobs, Insecurity, Dancing, Nightmares, Cooking, Alcohol, Cuddling, Engagement, Happy Endings) – Fairy tales are stories, and this one starts with a wish.

The Time Traveller's Flatmate Series by orithea (E, 68,674+ w. across 4 works || Time Travel AU || Developing Relationship, Threesome, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Selfcest) – Sherlock Holmes suffers from Chrono-Displacement: simply put, he time travels unpredictably, against his will. John Watson lives his life the normal way. Or as normal as it can possibly be considering that he first meets Sherlock at the age of six.

Realigning Gravity Series by Raina_at (E, 69,159+ w. across 2 works || Series WiP || Sci-Fi / 24th Century Future AU || Post TRF, Cybernetic John, Estrangement, Reconciliation, Developing Relationship, Anniversary, Case Fic, Happy Endings, Doctor John) – Two years ago, Sherlock Holmes jumped off the roof of New London Hospital. Two months ago, he walked into John's clinic as if no time had passed at all. John hasn't seen him since. But then Sherlock knocks on John's door with a case he can't say no to, and while figuring out why the biggest manufacturer or synthetic limbs in the System is going after veterans, they also need to find out whether there's a way to fix what's broken between them.

The Sweetest Things Series by alexxphoenix42 (E, 76,894+ w. across 2 works || Series WIP || Shopkeeper AU || Alternate First Meeting, Beekeeping, Honey, Romance, Awkward First Time Sex, Body Self Consciousness, Sussex, Fluff, Jealousy, Coming Out, Misunderstandings, Case Fic, Angst with Happy Ending) – In an alternate universe, Sherlock is busy keeping to himself, tending his bees, and selling lovely jars of honey when a soldier limps into his life quite unexpectedly.

Seven Moons Series by ladyflowdi (E, 92,824+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP ||Fantasy Omegaverse AU || Non Con Drug Use, Knotting, Heat Cycles, Forced / Arranged Marriage, Forced Heat, Mpreg, Slavery, Pregnant Sex, Loss of Virginity, Miscarriage Mention, Childbirth, Male Lactation, Breast Feeding, Confidence Issues, Kidnapping, Betrayal, Blood, Graphic Labour/Delivery, War, Family) –  “This is happiness?” John asks, utterly heartsick, holding up his wrists and rattling the chains. “You’ve sold me for six gold mines and protection along the northern border.”

Northern Light Series by Minxchester (E, 93,412+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Security Guard AU || Security Guard John, Rape / Non-Con, Blackmail, Forced Marriage, Captivity, Assorted Pairings, Suicide Attempt, Depression, Non-Con Touching, Eventual Happy Ending) – Recently returned from the war and struggling to adjust back to civilian life, John Watson is given an unexpected opportunity when he's hired as a security guard by Charles Magnussen on the recommendation of his former comrade, Sergeant Murray. Before long, he finds himself assigned the unusual task of serving as personal bodyguard to Magnussen's reclusive husband. But not everything is as it seems in this household--and John gets a lot more than he bargained for looking after Sherlock Holmes.

31_Days_of_Porn_Challenge_2017 Series by distantstarlight (E, 96,540 w. across 31 stories || Prompt Ficlets, Assorted Kinks, PWP) – A collection in response to the 31 Days of Porn Challenge issued by AtlinMerrik! Thanks for doing that because this has been buttload of fun (that joke never gets old). All stories will be brief stand-alone one-shots.

The Ravine Valley Series by SilentAuror (E, 98,196 w. across 2 works || Post-S4, Fake Relationship, Sex Trafficking, Case Fics, Group Therapy, Awkwardness, Past Loss of Child, Bed Sharing, Wedding, Angst, Romance, First Times, Massages) – Sherlock and John go undercover at Ravine Valley, a therapy centre for same-sex male couples in an investigation into a possible human trafficking ring. As they pose as a couple and fake their way through the therapy sessions for the sake of the case, it quickly becomes difficult to avoid discussing their very real issues. Set roughly nine months after series 4.

The Book of Silence/Rosa Felicia Series by SilentAuror (E, 99,752+ w. across 2 works || Series WIP || S4 / Post-S4 Fix It, New Relationship, Slow Burn, Kissing, Virgin Sherlock, Cases, First Time, Domesticity, Sex Toys, Cooking, Rosie Watson, Part-Time Parentlock, Bisexuality, Family Drama) – As spring blooms in London, John and Sherlock begin to take new cases and cautiously negotiate this new phase of life with John living at Baker Street again. Despite how well it's all going, John struggles to forgive himself for the way he treated Sherlock following Mary’s death as well as trying to figure out how to finally put his long-time feelings for Sherlock into words.

Mathematical Proof Series by Bitenomnom (E, 108,481 w. across 50 works || Mutual Pining, Assorted Timelines, Drabbles, Mathematics, Kissing, Humour, Friendship / Love, Past Relationships) – Drabbles written using the content of math class meetings from that day as prompts -- mostly Johnlock, mostly separate from one another -- in a variety of formats, points of view, etc.

The Baker Street Nativity Verse Series by SwissMiss (E, 109,655 w. across 3 works || Nativity! Fusion || Teacher Sherlock, Assistant John, UST, Trust Issues, Kids, Music, Anal Fingering Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Kissing, Swearing, Slow Burn, Pining, Shopping, Siblings, Friendship) – Fusion between Sherlock (BBC) and Nativity! (2009 movie starring Martin Freeman). Sherlock is a primary school teacher and John is assigned to be his classroom assistant. Together, they are charged with putting on the school's Nativity play. What could possibly go wrong? Includes main story, DVD extras, and 24-part Advent calendar drabbles.

Baker Farms Series by CodenameMeretricious (E, 111,042+ w. across 2 works || Series WiP || Sports Equestrian AU || Fluff, Angst, Humour, Show Jumping, Horses, Horse Groomer John, Event Rider Sherlock) – Sherlock is a top eventing rider currently training at Baker Farms. John is the new groom who's been told to steer clear of the surly rider and his horses.

between each beat Series by darcylindbergh & hudders-and-hiddles(E, 114,417+ w. across 2 works || Series WIP || Epistolary, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Marriage, Alcohol, Drug Use, Missing Scenes, Happy Ending) – On their wedding night, John and Sherlock gift each other with the things they each said when the other could not hear, the things they each put down where the other could not see: a collection of writings that illustrate the way their love for one another has grown over the years.

STATIC Series by patternofdefiance(E, 116,923+ w. across 2 works || Series WiP || Future AU || Cybernetic Augmentation, Discrimination, Developing Relationship, Cyborg John, Body Dysmorphia, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Dissociation, Sci-Fi Violence/Goal, Body Modification, Amputation, Angst, Misunderstandings) – The stigma against human augmentation has never lifted – not after the initial kinks in the operating software and hardware integrations resulted in some curious physical and personality…defects. Despite the lives it’s subsequently saved, the tests the procedures have passed, and the unending barrage of PR stunts and ad campaigns. And then John had gone and got himself shot, and science had taken him in like an overbearing mother, like a charity case, and hadn’t taken ‘no’ for an answer, hadn’t wanted ‘no’ for an answer.

The Swan Triad Series by Pennin_Ink (T, 121,660 w. across 3 works || Swan Lake AU || Magical / Fairy Tale AU, Romance, Falling in Love, Pining, Psychological Torture, Transformation) – Sherlock and John grow up spending every summer together. Their mothers' attempts to play matchmaker only fuel their mutual resentment and scorn. But then, one summer.

25 Days of Johnlock Series by prettysailorsoldier (E, 136,961 w. across 13 works || Random Prompts, Various AUs, Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, First Kiss) – 25 Days of festive prompts submitted by all of you! Every Christmas trope imaginable will make an appearance, as well as a few surprises, so be sure to check the tags for all the specifics!

Just Johnlock Series by Calais_Reno (M, 137,300+ w. across 32 works || Series WiP || Coming Out, Drunken Confessions, Alternating POV, Drunkenness, Love Confessions, Fluff, Jealousy, Past Relationships, Awkward Romances, Suicidal Thoughts, Blogging, Assorted Timelines, Angst, Fluff, Sherlock's Mind Palace, Mutual Pining, Hurt / Comfort, Rescue Missions, Deductions, Cases, Reunions, Birthdays, Oblivious John, Developing Relationship, Assorted Stories) – Standalone short stories occurring within the BBC Sherlock Universe. In most cases, the stories are not related and can be read in any order. A few what-ifs and alternate first meetings. Some fluff, some angst, all happy endings.

The Colors 'Verse Series by Quesarasara (E, 144,562+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Soul Mate AU || Colour Bonding, Angst, Pining, Cases, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Parenting, Fluff and Angst, John’s PTSD, Romance, Alternating POV) –  Everyone on earth is born with eyes that see in black, white, and an endless series of greys. When you meet your soulmate, you finally see the world in color. We're all searching for the person who brings color to our lives. John and Sherlock are no exception.

Baseball Series by earlgreytea68 (M, 146,073 w. across 4 works || Baseball Player AU || Slow Burn / Dev. Rel., Possessive/Obsessive Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Body Appreciation, Depression, Closeted Sexuality, Family, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Ogling Each Other, Anxious Sherlock, Panic Attack, Drunkenness, Talk of Forever, Big Feelings) – Sherlock Holmes is a pitcher and John Watson is a catcher. No, no, no, it's a baseball AU.

Two Two One Bravo Baker Universe by abundantlyqueer, boxoftheskyking, neenya, seiji, suchanadorer (E, 155,485+ w. across 25 works || Series WIP || Military AU || Afghanistan, Soldier John, Thriller, War Stories, Assorted OCs) – Captain John Watson of 40 Commando, the Royal Marines, is assigned to protect and assist Sherlock Holmes as he investigates what appears to be a simple war atrocity in Afghanistan. An intense attraction ignites between the two men as they uncover a conspiracy that threatens everything they’ve ever known, but Sherlock is as much hunted as hunter, and everyone close to him is in deadly danger. Can he solve the case in time to save himself and John?

Drawn to Stars Series by Silvergirl (E, 164,360+ w. across 5 works || Series WiP || S4 Fix It, Original Characters, Sherlock/OMC, Jealous John, Mutual Pining, Italy, Mutual Misunderstandings, First Kiss / Time, Alternating POVs, Angst With Happy Ending) – After the Culverton Smith case Sherlock is clean, working, and looking for a romantic partner—since John has told him that’s what he needs. Shame John didn’t mention he was interested in that role himself, before Sherlock went off to Rome with a gorgeous Italian copper to try to fall in love and become a complete human being.

The Summer Boy Series by khorazir (M, 168,598+ w. across 4 works || Series WiP || Post-TAB, Flashbacks, Kid Sherlock, Inexperienced Sherlock, Bullying, Sussex, Grief/Mourning, First Kiss/Time, Folklore, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD, BAMF John, Kidnapping, Past Torture, Developing Relationship, Canon-Typical Violence, Bed Sharing, Caring John/Sherlock) – About half a year after the fateful events at Appledore, Sherlock and John embark on a private case in Sussex. For Sherlock, it’s a journey into his past, bringing up memories both happy and sad that he has locked away for almost thirty years. For John, it means coming to terms with the present – and a potential future with Sherlock.

Skeletons Series by flawedamythyst (T, 174,262 w. across 3 works || Nightmare Before Christmas Fusion ||  Implied Character Death) – Sherlock's refusal to talk about his past hides far more skeletons than John could ever have guessed at. Halloween-esque AU.

Mise en Place Series by azriona (M, 181,300+ w. across 7 works || Series WiP || Restaurant AU || Cooking, Celebrity Chef Sherlock, Restaurant TV Show, Camp Fires, Brothers, Kissing, Baking, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers) – John Watson had no intentions of taking over the family business, but when he returns from Afghanistan, battered and bruised, and discovers that his sister Harry has run their restaurant into the ground, he doesn't have much choice. There's only one thing that can save the Empire from closing for good – the celebrity star of the BBC series Restaurant Reconstructed, Chef Sherlock Holmes.

Unkissed Series by 221b_hound (T to E, 184,100 w. across 45 works || Established Relationship, Ace Sherlock) – Sherlock returned from the dead a year ago. John returned to Baker Street six months ago. They've been in a couple since then. or at least, not NOT a couple. For two smart men, they sure can be dumb. Luckily, an art thief tries to drown Sherlock, Sherlock has a fever dream and things are about to change.

Conductivity Series by liriodendron (E, 207,367 w. across 7 works || TRF / Post TRF, ReunionCanon Typical Violence, Developing Relationship, Friendship, Romance, Sexual Tension, First Kiss/Time, Synesthesia, Power Dynamics, Self-Harm, Drug Use, Case Fic, Est. Rel., References to Drug Use, Homophobic Language, Religious Content, Intercrural Sex, Unrequited Love, Angst, References to Suicide, Injury, Anal, Dub. Con, BDSM, Suicidal Thoughts, Violent Sex, Suicide, Grief/Mourning, Break Up) – In which Sherlock Holmes locates his heart, John Watson learns what it's like to burn, and there is no darkness that cannot be made bright.

Care And Companionship Series by elldotsee and J_Baillier (E, 209,820+ w. across 5 works || Series WiP || Me Before You Fusion || Angst, Romance, Depression, Medical Ethics, Insecure Sherlock, Serious Illness, Permanent Injury, Sherlock Whump, BAMF John, Doctor John, Injury Recovery, Physical Rehabilitation, Medical Realism, Assisted Suicide, Awkward Sex, Friends to Lovers, Alcoholism, John Whump, PTSD, Anxiety, Family Drama, Caretaker John, Alternating POVs) – Invalided home from Afghanistan, running out of funds and convinced that his surgical career is over, John Watson accepts a mysterious job offer to provide care and companionship for a disabled person. Little does he know how much hangs in the balance of his performance as he settles into his new life at Musgrave Court.

Fallen Series by Belladonna_Q and mamishka (T, 222,094 w. across 3 works || Winglock || Angel!John, Angels & Demons, Faes, Christianity, Changelings) – In a world where myth, mystery, and the supernatural flourish beneath the veneer of modern civilization, Sherlock is a master of magic as well as science and deduction. But there are some things that he cannot see, riddles he cannot unravel, even when they walk right beside him in the form of one John Watson…

Performance in a Leading Role Series by Mad_Lori (E, 223,707+ w. across 9 stories || Series WiP || Actor AU || Show Business, Romance, Coming Out, Secret Relationship, Meta Fic, Hollywood, Interviews, Academy Awards, Relationship Beards) – Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winner in the midst of a career slump. John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in the rom-com ghetto. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new independent drama, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance make its way into the real world?

Breakable Not Broken Series by MissDavis (E, 227,442+ w. across 5 works || Series WiP || Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Permanent Injury, Mental Health Issues, Depression, Drug Use) – After John is seriously injured, Sherlock struggles to figure out how to help him, keep himself sane, and maybe, just maybe, get their life back to the way it's supposed to be.

Hollowverse Series by ScopesMonkey (E, 228,876 w., || Post-TRF / Post-Hiatus, Reunion, Cases, Romance, Mystery, Friendship, Developing Relationship, First Kiss/Time, Rimming, Oral/Anal, Survival, Hand Jobs, Amnesia, Showers, Injury, Teasing, Nightmares, Travelling) – Forced to return to London sooner than expected, Sherlock falls into a case too close to home.

John and Sherlock's Kinky First Times Series by wendymarlowe (E, 247,051+ w. across 45 works || Series WiP || Short Stories, Assorted Tags with Assorted Genres, PWP) – A collection of short imaginings of how Sherlock and John might finally allow their relationship to become physical. Don't be afraid of the giant cloud of tags - each fic stands alone and you can read them in any order.

Tennis Series by Jupiter_Ash (E, 249,198+ w. across 6 works || Series WiP || Tennis AU || French Sherlock, Angst) – John and Sherlock are professional tennis players and it’s Wimbledon. One is a broken almost was at the end of his career, the other an arrogant rising star tipped for greatness. It should have been a straightforward tournament. It really should have been. How were they to know that a chance encounter would change everything?

Johnlock Smut (with Feels) Series by CarmillaCarmine (E, 270,569+ w. across 33 works || Series WiP || Assorted Tags across Various Genres, Stand-Alone Ficlets) – Here are all my Johnlock smut fics - all can be read separately, as stand-alone. Enjoy!

Secrets and Revelations Series by Hisstah (E, 295,909+ w. across 3 works || Guides & Sentinels Omegaverse AU || Graphic Violence, Bonding, BAMF John/Sherlock, Anal / Oral, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock, Omega Guide John, Case Fics, Mpreg, Fluff and Angst) – Dr John Watson has some major secrets that he's kept from his flatmate, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock Holmes. Now the Sentinel Tower is after him. Can John stay out of their hands until he can reveal his secrets to Sherlock?

Forethought and Fire Series by 7PercentSolution & shelleysprometheus (E, 352,650+ w. across 5 works || Series WiP || Johnlock and MorMor || Original Characters, Case Fics, Alternating POV, Bisexual John, Gay Sherlock, Travelling, Developing Relationships, , Revenge, Betrayal, Blood and Torture, Trust, Bereavement, Entrapment, Extortion, Suicidal Ideation) – "The real great perfumers are not perfumers, they are the bees, the winds, the rivers and other things that carry and mix scents in space" ~ Serge Lutens.

Happiness Awaits Series by Mssmithlove (E, 377,160+ w. across 19 works || Series WiP || Assorted AUs || Short Stories, Assorted Tags Across Assorted Genres, Happy Endings) – This is a collection of delightfully sappy short stories. There will be love, sex, angst, first meetings, first kisses, first times, teenlock, unilock, ANYlock really, and they will have all the feels one can have. Every story will be a different length, some longer, some shorter. Every story will be different and as of now the only theme is that they will all have happy endings.

The English job Series by Hotaru_Tomoe (E, 466,195+ w. across 48 works || Series WiP || Assorted Relationships, Assorted Standalone Stories, Assorted Tags Across Various Genres) – Basically where I store all the English fics I write and the translations from my native language, Italian.

The Fallen Series by Engazed (E, 628,898+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Post-TRF Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Rape/Non-Con, Friendship, Angst, Gore, Detective Story) – This is the story of The Fall. When Sherlock chose to jump off the roof of St Bartholomew's Hospital to save his friends, he could not have anticipated the devastating and far-reaching consequences. He wasn't the only one who fell that day.

THERE BUT FOR THE GRACE OF JOHN WATSON Series by skyefullofstars (M, 647,634+ w. across 3 works || Series WiP || Angst, Violence, Non-Consensual Drugging, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Torture, Drug Addiction, Kidnapping/Abduction, Disturbing Imagery, Killing, Past Child Abuse, Suicide Attempt, Homophobic Language, Minor Character Death, Espionage, Psychological Trauma, BAMF John/Sherlock, PTSD Sherlock, Murder Mystery) – While Sherlock grapples with his new-found feelings for John Watson, he faces a very real threat: John's kidnapping and shooting at the hands of James Moriarty. And the knowledge that the love of his life is being used to test an addictive drug - at the risk of John's sanity and life.

Sketchy Series by serpentynka (E, 696,806 w. across 5 works || Post TRF Canon Divergence, Career Change, Love Story/Romance, Slow Burn, Art, Illness / Heath Issues, Coming of Age, Established Relationship, Porn With Feelings, Philosophy, Portraiture, John Whump, Switching, First Time, Retirement, Travel, Possessive John, Jealous Sherlock, Marriage, Cases) – What (and who) will be left when nobody cares about your Work? A slow-burn fic with cases, places, mistaken identities, unfair choices, essential changes, violent feels, blatant lies, fearless portraiture, family secrets, high-risk bespoke gifts, durable friendships, bedtime stories, foreign travel and tongues, sickness (and health), and the significance of things which are slow to unfurl -- but cannot be ignored. Oh, and...porn.

Unwind Series by illwick (E, 741,012+ w. across 36 works || Series WiP || Light BDSM / Power Dynamics, Dom!John/Sub!Sherlock, Switchlock, Hair-Pulling, Sensory Deprivation, Deepthroating, Face-Fucking, Handcuffs, Overstimulation, Forced Orgasm, Prostate Milking / Massage, Rough Sex, Biting, Food Sex, Consensual Kink, Sex on Everything, Chair Bondage, Voyeurism, Exhibitionism, Masturbation, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Oral/Anal, Fingering, Sex Toys, Captain John, Establish Relationship, Bratty Sherlock, Greedy Sherlock, Military Kink, Uniform Kink, Gunplay, Roleplay, Shower Sex, Oral Fixation, Praise Kink, Dry Humping, Facials, Dog Tags, Edgeplay, Multiple Orgasms, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Threesomes, Homophobia, Size Kink, Past Relationships, Past Drug Use, Double Penetration, Angst/Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Panties) –  John and Sherlock unwind after a case. 

[devieuls]

ˋ Let me Love you༄ ☣

Neteyam Sully x Na'vi Fem Reader <SERIES >

Warning of the Serie: MDNI. Dom Neteyam x Fem Na'vi Reader.

SMUT: Dirty Talk; Fangs; Bites; fingering; Blood; Spit; Jealousy and Possessiveness; Foreplay; violence; Swearing; Teasing; Unprotected Sex; betrayal; slut shaming; oral sex; dacryphilia; outdoorsex; jealousy BDSM.

ANGST: mention of suicide, toxic relationship, words inherent in death, sexual assault, self-harm, derealization, suffering, Requited / Unrequited love, prejudices, bullying and insults. and FLUFF. There will be flashbacks in this series

Aged characters: Neteyam 22 y.o / You 19 y.o.

Synopsis: In the darkest point of your life, swallowed by the abyss, you decide to put an end to your sufferings, seeking relief in the extreme act. Your life was an intricate dance between life and death, and when life decided to take leave and leave death alone in you, you got lost. And as if he had been sent by Eywa himself, a mysterious Na'vi, saves you from hitting bottom, sacrificing himself so you don’t give up. Becoming the light that shone in your darkness. He is the sun that faces your night, and you are the Moon, eternally distant from him.

He grabbed your hand and dragged you away, taking you to his village, a place of healing and hope where he will try to make you love life again, showing you the light you had long lost. Starting a journey of healing, to fight against your demons that tormented you relentlessly, to finally find happiness where you would never have bothered to find it.

Two fates crossed under the tacit protection of the Great Mother, to show that even two opposites can create something perfectly chaotic.

And what happens when night and day dance together, to the rhythm of the stars and waves of balance, eternal opposites that are inevitably attracted?

This is the story of how death falls in love with life; how the sun one day decided to save the moon and how darkness is not so dark if light can penetrate. But also a story of suffering and torment, where not everything is roses and flowers.

CHAPTER WARNING: Mention of suicide and slight violence.

Lenght : 5.1k

NA'VI WORDS: Yawne: Beloved; Tspangoe: I invented this, it means "Suicidal". It comes from "Tspang": Kill and "Oe": I/Me. I couldn’t find a word that came close, so I made it up.

TW: THE SERIES WILL BE FULL OF DELICATE TOPICS!

⇠ Previous chapter ✵ Next Chapter ⇢

· · ─────── · 𖥸 · ─────── · ·

Chapter II: Poisonous as Death

The morning light seeped through the drawn skin curtain, dancing gently over your still pale skin. As you opened your eyes annoyed, your vision was blurred at first, but gradually the world around you materialized. You found yourself in a tent that was filled with scents of herbs and burnt incense, noticing a woman sitting on her back with a shawl of red beads that shone on contact with the blinding light.

As you tried to orient yourself, the sounds of nature gently entered your ears. The melodious chirping of birds filled the air, creating a natural symphony that seemed to sing its awakening. You breathed deeply as the earthy aroma of wet earth, mixed with wild musk struck your nostrils, while the smell of wet wood and flowers charged the air with the typical smell of the forest clan.

With caution, you got up to sit on the carpet where you were lying, passing a hand between the braids while strong twines hit your head with pain. The mysterious na'vi pulled the curtains, opening them to change the air once she noticed your awakening, remaining silent. The woman held aromatic herbs in her hand, which she carefully mixed in a clay pot. The air was imbued with the therapeutic scents of the ingredients, which tickled your senses.

She looked up and a grimace spread across her wrinkled face. "You’re awake." She suddenly said in a tone that was too acidic to be even vaguely the Great Mother, but you thought that maybe it could really be her and that she was just angry with you because of the act you did.

"I am…" you whispered with a thread of voice, feeling strange pain at the height of the stomach, while you noticed bandages covering some points of your body.

The old woman approached you, grabbed you by the jaw, carefully looking at your face, turning it as she wished to look for signs of possible trauma or other. "You have a strong spirit, not many survive a fall from such a high waterfall." you opened wide your eyes, pulling yourself back from her grip, observing her with incredulity

"Where am I now?" Your tone was impatient as you looked around, beginning to realize that perhaps your attempt to end it had not come to an end.

The one you identified as the Tsahìk sat next to you, looking at you with hard eyes, filled with contempt. Her time-stamped face and wrinkly hands silently told the story of a woman who had spent her life saving the lives of those who struggled to hold onto it, and who had now healed and saved the life of someone who didn't appreciate the Great gift. The silence weighed heavily between you, interrupted only by the whisper of the forest, which bore the typical melody accompanied by the lively sounds of the village in which you had involuntarily happened.

"You are in the Omatikaya clan, in my tent." she began, acidly, poisoning your body with a few simple words.

You were alive, still stuck in this hell, in the darkness and in the shame that you couldn’t even get it over with.

Meanwhile, Neteyam slowly approached his grandmother’s tent, the heart in his throat and a mixture of hope and fear gripping him. He expected to find you in a comatose sleep, as he had already seen you in those days, but when he lifted the curtain and crossed the threshold, he was surprised. His eyes met your bandaged back, sitting, feeling a sense of happiness and relief to see you awake, remaining still in his footsteps even before opening the mouth.

You turned at once, peering at the boy you reluctantly recognized as 'the one who saved you'. Your gaze was tormented and angry in his. Your irises were like a stormy sea, overflowing with a mixture of gloomy emotions. There was a deep wound in your eyes, a palpable pain that reflected the anger and frustration of being saved against your will.

He looked down, noticing your sharp eyes as blades penetrating directly into his soul. He felt slightly guilty, as if he had somehow broken something sacred by intervening in your choice without your consent. Though on one side of him he was happy to have saved you, to have given you a chance to redeem yourself and enjoy everyday life.

In the meantime Mo'at had left the tent because of the strong and silent tension that was in the air, believing that it was better to leave you two alone to talk and clarify the situation.

"You." You hissed with disgust and acidity, making him shudder at the pungent tone as he approached and you automatically put yourself on the defensive. Your words remained suspended in the air, unable to really break the silence that permeated the tent at that moment.

Neteyam tried to pronounce his name, but held back, fearing that it would make the situation worse. He approached with caution, with a soft step, trying to show respect for the emotional space you needed to feel safe somehow.

You tried to stand up, but the strong pain of stitches and bruises forced you to sit again, while the worried look of the na'vi burned your skin, stretching out a hand as if to prevent you from trying the stupid move again.

"No, don’t move" he said harshly, albeit with a sweet and thoughtful undertone. "You must take it easy, you risked a lot in these days of coma" His tone presented an obvious sign of concern.

You walked away from Neteyam’s close hand just as a wounded animal did, as if you wanted to protect yourself from the outside world, a world that had shattered your expectations and inflicted unimaginable suffering on you. You carried a hand between the now slightly damaged braids, feeling other pains to the head that made you tighten your eyes for the pain.

" Why am I still here?" You hissed while your gaze was focused on your legs, becoming empty and devoid of emotion like your voice. " I threw myself. Why did you save me?" you growled and gritted your teeth, as faint sighs came out of your cerulean and tired lips.

Neteyam listened to you in silence, keeping his eyes down as he searched for the right words not to hurt you. He felt the desperation in your voice, your need to find a way out of that emotional chaos that was pressing you like a rock on the sand. He wishes he could offer you comfort, healing and redemption, but he knew you would be hostile to him because of his 'heroic' act.

"Because I would never let a young Na'vi like you throw her life away like that. Not on my watch." answered with solemn confidence, looking up only for that moment. "You may not see it, but your life means something, you are important to someone" he approached you slightly, still trying not to cross the line he himself had drawn for you.

"I asked you to let me go, to leave me alone. I asked you to leave me, not to save me. And you ignored my words and saved me." You growled as you took a break, meeting his gaze with wrath. "You don’t even know me and you saved me! Why did you do it?! Who are you to decide whether or not to save someone?!" some frozen tears cut your face because of frustration. "I don’t want to live. Why didn’t you let me die?" your tone became weaker, as your heart began to pump blood faster and faster. "You should have let me die…" you whispered as your eyes silently chained. Your look dull, dead, almost extinct, while the only desire that seemed to shine in that amber mirror was death.

Neteyam felt a bitter taste in his mouth, answering urgently. "No, I didn’t and I won’t. I won’t let you die" he retorted, approaching you, taking you by the shoulders almost instinctively. "I don’t need to know you to know that you are someone’s daughter, someone’s sister, someone’s friend, and you belong to a clan. You mean something to someone who will one day regret not being able to save you in time. Please stop saying those words" His golden eyes looked at you pleading, while his voice cracked. < Possible that she suffered so much…? > he asked himself looking at your glassy eyes.

You walked away from his touch again, growling at him, with anger and melancholy. Your soul was still fragile and vulnerable, so hostility was the mask you decided to wear, hoping that for this reason they would also abandon you.

"I WAS someone’s daughter, I WAS someone’s sister, I WAS someone’s friend, I HAD a people and a clan. Now I HAVE nothing. because I WAS someone’s loved one, not now, not me." you felt a bite to the throat, a knot that held the words while you vomited them with blood, tearing you with every sentence. "They’re all dead and buried. so whether or not I join the death toll, you don’t have to decide that for me." Your eyes were like pools of dark, deep water, reflecting the abyss of pain you carried inside of you. They are eyes that once could shine with life, but now they were dull and lifeless, hopeless. Your gaze was charged with an overwhelming mixture of anger and sadness, a storm of emotions ready to crash against the man in front of you. Your bitter voice ruined by yet another growl. "As I said, we don’t know each other. So why do you insist on saving me?"

"You were… if you really don’t have anyone, then let me be your people, introduce you to mine and make them yours. I will be your friend, your sister, your family and a companion to cry on if it is necessary. But I won’t let you disappear, because I know there’s still a flame of life inside of you that wants to shine again." His voice began to flicker, but soon he intensified with something reminiscent of hope. A mixture of desperate determination and concern, with a desire to make you understand that there are reasons why it was worth living. "You’re a stranger, it’s true, but I won’t let you do something so stupid. I won’t let you go." He said seriously. He would like to eradicate the pain from your heart somehow, give light to your dead eyes. "You don’t have to do it alone. I will help you, and if you allow me, we will find a reason for you to live, together. Just let me help you."

You looked away from him, gritting your teeth as your jaw twitched. Your heart so heavy it crushed the organs below.

"You don’t understand…" you whispered in an absent voice, looking out at the curtain walls as you scraped the palm of your hand because of frustration. "I don’t want to live. I don’t want to live anymore. This is not life, it’s not my clan and you can’t be the piece that stops the sinkhole. My life… died with them. But don’t you see? this is only a body that pulls forward and that will turn off" Your voice made the blood freeze to Neteyam, who raised his ears as his tail stopped moving in the air, finding rest behind him. You were honest, you weren’t lying, and he understood that. "I need you to let me go."

"You’re not listening to me. We can find you a life here, even if the life you had before was taken from you… give this a chance." He said gently, trying to hide the pain you had given him. You can form a new family here…" his head bent to the side looking for your eyes, pleading. " Please… believe me" he timidly extended his hand, before leaving it hanging in the air. "Look at me, please. You will not be alone in this." Neteyam was determined after a long time.

He will be patient with you, he will listen to you and he will try to advise you, these were the resolutions that he had fixed in his mind. He will try to understand the pain that burns inside you, and he will burn with it if it helps you.

You didn’t look at him, just taking long breaths, not wanting to answer what you had just been told.

"I promise I will never leave you alone in this fight. I will be here for you, even when it seems like no one else is, and even when you treat me this way. I will not give up, just let me in" he said before he got up. And in that instant, you felt yourself drowning once again, no longer in the waters of the oblivion of that river, but in an unexplored sea of conflicting and inextricable feelings. "You cannot let go like this. You cannot let the dark take over��� "

With one last look full of compassion, the man quietly withdrew from the tent, letting you face your emotions in the silence and privacy you needed. Knowing that the path to healing will take time.

For hours you found yourself alone in the hut, not knowing that Neteyam had forbidden anyone to disturb your solitude, still keeping you under surveillance from outside. The Tsahìk’s hut was comfortable, the atmosphere that enveloped the tent was warm and full of positivity, in which the smell of herbs mixed with that of the skin of the tent

You sat on the floor, on the soft carpet, with your legs crossed and your gaze lost in the void. The light of day burst in creating small shadows that seemed to reflect the storm that was stirring in you. Your hands clasped softly around your knees, the contact with your now rough skin offered you an anchor point in reality while the chaos of your emotions threatened to drag you down again into the abyss. The memories of your attempted act tormented you, making you relive the darkness that you had tried so hard to escape. You wondered how you got to that point, how you got so overwhelmed by the pain that you wished it was over.

As you watched the tent in silence, you thought back to the words that the one who saved you had addressed to you, words full of understanding and hope. His voice rang in your mind, like a lighthouse in the night, trying to guide you to a way out of that maze of despair.

"if you really don’t have anyone, then let me be your people, introduce you to mine and make them yours. I will be your friend, your sister, your family and a companion to cry on if it is necessary. But I won’t let you disappear" , "You cannot let go like this. You cannot let the dark take over… "

His words continued to echo in the walls of your mind, the urge to reject them was strong, but at the same time you knew there was a glimmer of truth in those words. A lonely tear turned your face unmoved, happy to be alone so that no one would see you cry again. The shadow of anger and resentment persisted in you as you erased his eyes and his face from your mind, attaching these words to him, that they were inevitably intertwining with a faint flame of hope ched in his little he had fed with a brief conversation.

You sighed deeply as you leaned your head on the pulled fabric of the curtain, trying to fend off that tornado of overwhelming feelings that the boy had sown in you. You decided to give yourself the opportunity to face your demons, but without being helped, you would have defeated your demons just so you could leave in peace.

The words of the Omatikaya boy could not erase your past and your pain, but perhaps they had unconsciously opened a window into the future, a future you thought you did not deserve and where hope and joy could still shine.

Suns began to fall on the horizon, painting the sky with pinkish and purple shades. The village was animated outside the tent in view of the eclipse, while families joyfully gathered in the center of the village to share the dinner as usual.

A voice crept into the solitude of the place where you were still sitting, drawing your attention with a calm yet concerned tone. "Can I come in?"

His words were warm, but you stiffened feeling cold chills hitting your back. You still felt the weight of his actions, the way your will had been ignored to save you from something you didn’t want to be saved from.

"No, leave me alone." You spit bitterly, cold and resolute, closing yourself in once again, hoping to be heard at least this time.

He hesitated for a moment, but then entered the tent with caution, trying not to disturb the dark and tense atmosphere that surrounded you. The dim light of the natural lamps began to light up gradually due to bioluminescence, casting some soft shadows on the skin walls.

"I thought you might be hungry…" he whispered softly and patiently. He was holding a small basket of food that the village had prepared for dinner. The inviting scent of food spread in the air, making you strive to ignore it, keeping your eyes away.

"I’m not hungry. You can leave now." Hissing as your stomach seemed to close to his concern and kindness. He laid the basket on the ground, cautiously approaching you.

"You have to feed your body. Please, just take something," he insisted as he stretched your food, keeping his distance.

You looked up at him, growling, the anger still present in your vitreous gaze. "Don’t you understand?" Your face was stiff, with a still palpable hostility. You squeezed on yourself, creating an invisible barrier between you two. "I don’t want your food." hissing with a grudge voice. "I don’t want anything from you."

The Na'vi’s gaze softened further, though he felt some remorse against his golden irises.

"I know it may seem difficult to accept my help, again… but please don’t deny yourself what you need because of me" he says with a tender voice, trying to make you understand that his gesture is motivated by concern and care. "Eating is a way to take care of your body and start healing. Please try to accept, do it for yourself." his firm, yet compassionate voice, hoping to find your consent.

You stared at the food in front of you, struggling with your inner resistance. After a moment of hesitation, a small sigh escapes from your lips.

You reached the food with your fingers trembling and swiped a piece of teylu towards your mouth. The first bite was reluctant, but slowly the taste and feeling of nourishment run through your mouth like a waterfall. The man’s sweet eyes lingered over you, smiling softly when he saw that you were finally letting him in somehow.

You gave him an indecipherable look as you chewed, with an ounce of admiration mingling with your strong resentment. Perhaps a small, hidden part of you wished for him to stay, believing that someone could still see past your wound.

While dinner was now taking place in the center of the village, you two remained in the tent, enveloped by the tension and uncertainty of the moment. He stood quietly watching you eat, making sure you really fed well.

"You must go, your village is dining…" whistling as you looked away from him, grabbing a yovo fruit, feeling the sweetness pinch your taste buds while the aromatic juice made you close your eyes nostalgically.

"I can eat later. now it is important that you eat" He answered gently, while yet another smile painted on his face, warming your heart in some strange way. "However, you can call me Neteyam" he whispered, offering his name to your ears.

You looked up, and your eyes seemed slightly more present. The sound of his name strangely resonated in your mind, sweet and melodious, like a caress to your ears.

"Ne-te-yam…Neteyam" you repeated in a low voice, experiencing the sweetness of the syllables of his name on your tongue.

Neteyam smiled again, spontaneously, as a light of joy lit in his eyes as you repeated his name without disgust or hostility. He had decided to share his name in the hope that it might be the first thread that could join you.

"Yes, Neteyam." he repeated, looking at how you seemed to want to engrave that name in your memory. His name gave you a strange feeling of calm.

You looked away from him, looking at the food you were tinkering with between your exiled fingers. "Thank you, Neteyam…" You whispered with a thread of voice and then filled your mouth again. You didn’t specify what you were grateful to Neteyam, but he warmed his heart to hear your words, feeling more relaxed in his presence.

The silence enveloped the tent, only the sound of your breaths and the rustling of the leaves outside could break the stillness. Neteyam put a hand on your head, stroking the braids, a tender contact that served to remind you that you were no longer alone, that there was someone who cared for you.

Your eyes crossed Neteyam’s honeyed eyes, needing no further words at that time. Your expressions, your looks, say enough, and time seemed to slow down in the quiet.

The eclipse gave way to the night, and the air outside the tent was filled with deep serenity. The village could now be heard again in the distance, and the sounds of their merriment were present, as the forest began to fall asleep with the calls of nocturnal animals.

"y/n" you revealed at your turn, breaking the silence. Your voice finally slightly warm, as if your name was still something dear to you. " My name is Y/n.." Your voice floated like a melody, a sound that intertwined with serenade night nature.

Neteyam was struck by the beauty of your name, not expecting you to return the presentation as he looked at you with eyes shining with something you couldn’t recognize.

"Y/n…" Neteyam whispered, echoing your name reverently. His face glowed with a new light, as if the name had unleashed something magical inside him. "I’m glad to meet you, Y/n" replied softly with a smile. "You have a very nice name" His voice is a gentle symphony that intertwined with the melody of the night outside the tent.

You nodded without smiling back. The wind blew lukewarm air outside the tent, bringing with it a slight air of unease. The interior of the marui was enveloped in a peaceful atmosphere, while you and Neteyam exchanged silent glances of understanding, needing no words while you finished dining.

However, the serenity and harmony that was being created between you was shattered by the entrance of a young woman whom you recognized as Tsakarem because of the clothing, hair and jewelry typical of her role. The figure with the regal bearing and the face twisted by annoyance made her appearance, as she approached with disgusted step by your figure.

Her eyes were full of annoyance, anger and perhaps jealousy as she watched the scene in front of her. She immediately noticed you, staring at you with apprehension and surprise, if not with much disgust and superiority.

"Look at that! The tspangoe is awake." Her voice was sharp and cold as a blade, as she spoke her words sarcastically. Her attitude was full of contempt, as if she considered you little more than a nuisance, an intruder in her territory who robbed her of precious time with her partner.

"Tsu'Län." He called her in cold voice, annoyed at her turning to you with so little respect. He stood up to face the woman with a nervous and tense expression.

"What, ma yawentu? I’m not saying anything wrong. I just expressed my surprise that the Tspangoe is alive and awake." She raised an eyebrow as she spoke in a feigned, challenging tone, waiting for Neteyam’s reaction.

"Don’t call her like that." Neteyam’s voice was loud and firm, as he was quietly devouring his partner. "Y/N. Her name is Y/n and now that you know it, use her name to address her."

Tsu'Län was a woman of a charming beauty and an enviable bearing, with long braids covered with feathers and jewels identifying the title, but there was a cold and petty aura surrounding her. Her hard eyes shook you, emitting an obvious contempt followed by a grimace.

"Ah, so you named your Tspangoe. Interesting. Very nice of you to welcome her among us after you…found her in the forest" Your face shrank in disgust at her words and then growl at her, receiving the same reaction. It disgusted you that she was judging you without even knowing you. Even though you knew you were a 'tspangoe', you didn’t think anyone would ever tell you that to your face with so little delicacy.

"It’s her name, I didn’t give it to her. Don’t reduce her to a definition, this isn’t you." Neteyam’s tone made clear his intent to come to her senses and take back the words she had just spoken to you.

Tsu'Län burst into a cold, cynical laugh as she bent over with laughter and carried a hand to touch her lips, amused by the words of her partner. "I don’t see why we should worry about a Tsapngoe" she said with contempt and then looked down on you "Exactly since when we started helping these… people. Ma Yawnetu, I will always love you but I don’t expect to share your affection with this… thing."

Your heart tightened within seconds when your mind was finally enlightened, realizing that the two of them were paired and that this meant that Neteyam was the son of the Olo'eyktan and next in the line of succession. You knew the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya clan because he was the legendary Toruk Makto, so the weight of what you were experiencing became even heavier.

You raised your head, looking at her as if her words hadn’t even touched you, looking at her in the same way she did at you. You wouldn’t let some random Na'vi knock you down and humiliate you like this.

"I don’t want to take your 'Yawnetu', nor rob you of his… affection?" you answered firmly, mocking her subtly for her insecurity. "I didn’t ask to be involved in this situation, but I’m only here because Neteyam chose to save me. It was his choice to bring me here, not me. So you can get out of this tent and bring him if you wish. But don’t disrespect me, Tsu'Län" Your tone full of superiority and dignity, so much so that it made the young woman grit her teeth.

Neteyam tried to intervene again, trying to reach an agreement between the two of you, but it was clear that Reyin'al is not going to listen reasons and that you would not bend your head. Two unstoppable furies, she’s determined to enforce her claim to Neteyam and humiliate you, and you’re determined to put her back where she belongs.

"Tsu'Län, stop it. Even if you do not like her presence here, she remains a Na'vi and as such deserves respect and understanding" He stood before her, watching her soured because of her behavior, starting to lose patience.

The Tsakarem laughed again, a sharp laugh full of contempt. "Respect and understanding? For a na'vi who tried to take her own life? I don’t think so. The Tspangoe lose all rights when they become such and you know it better than I do" Her gaze fixed on you with disgust. She seemed to enjoy every word she hurled at you, trying to erode your confidence and confidence, abnormal traits for Tspangoes.

"Keep your hopes up, little tspangoe. Sooner or later you will return to the abyss from which you came out, and Neteyam will understand how wrong he was to save you." She said as she approached you, leaning on your person, amused by your look upset by his words.

You instinctively took her from the braids, making her fall to the ground while you watched her with a newfound flame, but of anger. You could have overlooked the slight insults, but even you knew that enough was enough.

Your fingers tightened the braids, tearing off some of the feathers that adorned her hair, as she gasped out of pain, hitting your arm to free herself from the vise.Neteyam tried to get closer but stopped when he saw your burning look on her.

"Listen carefully. I don’t know who has spoiled you to the point where you believe that you can treat people the way you want just because of your status. But do not believe for a second that you can address me in these tones, of your title I can not care less. A Tsakarem lives under the guidance of Eywa more than anyone other than Tsahìk, try to live up to your title, nothing is due to you. You respect me, and I will try not to make you cry all the tears that you never shed, okay?" you hissed at her ear, before you let go of your grip and make her fall at Neteyam’s feet, that in the while he had watched the scene in silence. He knew your reaction had been a little excessive, but only Eywa knew how much he wanted to put her in her place like that when she was being a bitch.

One of the few privileges of having reached the point of reaching the bottom, is that empathy was your master and only guide, so you could not care about things like the status and moral codes of the Na'vi.

Tsu'Län stood back as she watched as some of her feathers remained in your hand and growled at you, massaging her sore braids.

"Remember, Tspangoe, this is my territory." her impatient and threatening voice made you smile internally, amused by the fact that she still tried to frighten you. You shrugged and then growled at her and pushed her back, annoyed, before she went out and left.

Neteyam looked back at you, not realizing that you had this strong spirit under that dark veil that shrouded you. You lay down on the carpet, giving your back to the boy before you snort. "You go too, now."

Within minutes, that woman had managed to ruin the little thread that Neteyam had managed to wrap around you, to get you close to him. And now he seemed to have returned to the starting point, making him frustrated and angry with his companion who had been petty and disrespectful.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Notes:

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, things between Y/n and Neteyam are still sour but you can see the soft spot of Y/n.

While I would like to hug Neteyam because he is so cute, please. So boyfriend coded

- Mel

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　

[xuchiya]

"stuck in this fairytale" || choi san || series || fifteenth part

| genre: prince! san. fluff. angst. adventure | mentions: cursing. | here's the first part

back to masterlist | last chapter 16

The ground beneath your knees splintered further, cracks webbing out like a fragile pane of glass, and with a sharp cry, you plummeted into the abyss. Your screams echoed in the cold emptiness, but they were swallowed by a darkness so consuming that even your anguish felt small against its vastness.  

A gasp left your lips as you fell. The air blew your entire body as gravity pulled you on the never ending abyss. As I continue to fall on whatever death might come, memories—not your own—flashed before your eyes. A man and a woman, their silhouettes outlined by roaring flames. A love that burned bright but was drowned in betrayal and sorrow. Brigid’s heartbreak bled into your chest like molten lava, raw and unforgiving. The pain overwhelmed you, the weight of centuries of despair pressing into every nerve, every cell. 

It was worse than the monthly period you felt but it was more in your heart. 

You landed hard, the impact rattling through your bones, but you barely felt it through the storm of emotions tearing you apart. Unexpected tears fell on your cheeks, your hand clenching your shirt as the pain in your chest became too overwhelming. Sobs racked your body, and you clawed at the ground, desperate to make sense of it all. "Why?" you screamed into the darkness, your voice hoarse and broken. "Why do I have to feel this?! Why am I here?! To feel pain?! Why him?! Why Jongho?!"  

“WHY?!” You screamed amidst the darkness.

A soft glow began to illuminate the darkness, golden and warm, like the first light of dawn breaking through a storm. Slowly, the figure of Jeoyoung appeared before you, his presence commanding yet gentle. His eyes, pools of endless wisdom, held a deep sorrow that mirrored your own.  

"I am sorry," Jeoyoung said, his voice low and resonant, like the steady hum of embers in a dying fire. He knelt before you, his hands outstretched, but he didn’t touch you, as if afraid his presence would add to your burden. "I never wished for this pain to reach you. This is Brigid’s pain—her love, her loss, her sacrifice. And now, you carry it." 

You looked up at him, tears streaming down your face, anger and despair swirling in your gaze. "Then take it back!" you screamed, your voice cracking. Big tears falling. "Take it all back! I don’t want this! I didn’t ask for this! I want to go home!"  

Jeoyoung’s expression didn’t waver. Instead, he leaned closer, his voice softening. "I can’t take it back.” Shaking his head as he can’t do anything to save you and the misery you were feeling, “The flames inside you are not meant to destroy or merely protect. They are meant to give life."  

His words were a balm and a dagger, soothing yet cutting through the fog of your pain.  

"Brigid's fire was not born from vengeance or rage," he continued. "It was born from love—an unyielding love that even time could not extinguish. That is why it lingers in you now. Not to consume you, but to remind you of the power you hold. The power to heal, to nurture, and to bring life back where it has been lost."  

The flames within you flickered, as if responding to his words. Slowly, your mind drifted to San—your San—who had collapsed in the wake of Jongho’s sacrifice. His body, once so vibrant and full of strength, now lay crumbled on the battlefield, lifeless and still.  

Not only that, it brought you back to your own world where you admire him from afar, the times you both hang out and the silence you both shared when you held his hand for the first time. You were rather cowardly to speak up your feelings and San wasn’t one to assume by just simple actions that you normally do to Wooyoung.

Your breath hitched as realization dawned. The fire within you wasn’t just Brigid’s. It was Jeoyoung’s love—his legacy, he was the reason for the flames that you had in the first place. It was not Brigid who gave you that fire, it was him. You look up to him. It was as if he saw through you that you soon realize why you were here. It was meant to bring San back, to reignite the spark that had been extinguished.  

Jeoyoung and Brigid’s love was meant for you to save San. To recreate the love that never happened between them.

"But I don’t know how," you whispered, trembling. "I’m not strong enough."  

Jeoyoung smiled faintly, his expression both kind and resolute. "You are stronger than you believe. Strength is not the absence of pain, but the willingness to endure it for the sake of something greater. San carries your fire as much as you carry his. Your bond is what will guide you."  

He reached out then, his hand brushing against your chest, where the flames burned quietly within you. "Feel it. Let it guide you."  

The warmth of his touch spread through you, igniting the fire in your chest. It roared to life, not wild and consuming, but steady and fierce, like the heartbeat of something eternal. Jeoyoung began to fade, his golden glow retreating into the darkness.  

"Remember," he said, his voice like a fading ember. "The fire is not only yours—it is his, and hers, and mine. It is love, and it will always find a way."  

And then he was gone, leaving you alone in the void, the fire within you burning brighter than ever.  

You stood, the weight of Brigid’s pain no longer a crushing force but a steady hum in the back of your mind. Your tears dried as resolve filled your chest. You closed your eyes, focusing on the bond you shared with San, the memories of his laughter, his warmth, and his unwavering strength. The fire surged, guiding your steps, lifting you upward through the darkness. The ground returned beneath your feet, the battlefield coming into view once more. San lay before you, his massive form broken and still, and the sight of him nearly broke you again.  

But this time, you didn’t falter.  

You approached him, the fire within you glowing with a golden light that seemed to chase away the shadows around you. Kneeling beside him, you placed your hands on his chest, your voice steady as you whispered, "Come back to me, San. I—"

Your lips tremble as your words soon leave your lips, “I like you too, San. Back in my world, you were such a passionate guy on campus. You were admired by many and I was one of them, and any person who befriends you is lucky to have such a good looking guy.” A painful yet teasing chuckle left your lips as tears blurred your vision, your hand placed on top of his scales, it was cold yet beneath, it was warm.

“At first, I wanted to be friends with you but you were busy with student council and other events that my hope to talk to you just … vanished. And I ask fate that someday or any time of the day, to let my dream come true. And it did.” Your breath ragged as you ran down your hand on his scale, “Wooyoung introduced you to me. We became friends instantly and I thank fate for that.”

A blush crept up to your cheeks as you blurted out the moment you entered the library, “I … heard about your plans when you told Wooyoung you wanted to take me to the local library. You wanted to show me the newest books on sale and the ones you wanted me to read.”

You look at his dimmed eyes, tears swell but in happiness, “I saw your message on the shelf.” It was arranged according to the first letter of each title of the story ‘I like you’. You were so flustered that you brought out a book, the one that you were stuck on right now, and coincidentally, it shows the same image of San.

You leaned in closer to him, your forehead pressing gently on his scales, whispering, “When I return, I’ll tell you how the story went.” The flames poured out of you, golden and pure, wrapping around his form like a cocoon. The warmth spread through his scales, and slowly, the glow in his molten eyes began to return. You could feel his heartbeat—weak at first, but growing stronger with each passing moment.  

The fire within you dimmed as it passed into him, but it didn’t leave you empty. Instead, it left behind a warmth that was no longer Brigid’s pain but her hope—a hope she had passed down to you, to Jeoyoung, to San, and to everyone who carried her legacy.  

San’s massive form stirred, his claws twitching as his molten eyes locked onto yours. "You…" he rumbled, his voice weak but filled with something that brought fresh tears to your eyes.  

"I’m here," you said, your voice shaking with relief. "I’m here, and I’m not letting go."  

As San’s body glowed softly in the aftermath of the flames, you felt a deep certainty settle within you. This was not the end. This was the beginning—a new legacy of fire, forged not in pain, but in love.  

taglist: @passerbyforfun . @seongwars . @candied-czennie . @ffenjoyerdazme . @jiwoongsblondehair

[gojos-thot-patrol]

HIIII how have you been?? <33

Candy here, and dear lord have you heard about a star being named after satoru?? Literally, my first thought about it is that should tell this news to you and maybe request (if you’re not doing anything and up to writing rn) because i thought this star will really spread heart-wrenching fanfictions about him, something related to a star with satoru, i kept thinking about him and sugu and stars defining their fate.. sorry this is so vague, tell me if you want details hihi,

hope you’re doing so finee, have some candy babes 🫶🫶

CANDY HELLO DARLING HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?!?!

They named a Star after out boy?!?!?!?!? I'm gonna be emotional-

Okay okay, so I am currently working on kinktober BUT I'm gonna take a break here and wrote a lil warm up for you for two reasons.

The opening line to the fic instantly came to me and I couldn't not wrote a drabble at least

once you're one of my named anons or moots, you get special treatment <3

That being said, I call this one

Starlight.

When you first saw Satoru Gojo, you could have sworn whatever higher power there was put the stars in his eyes by hand, carefully and meticulously placing the celestial sparkles to make the most breathtaking eyes you had ever seen.

You saw galaxies when he laughed, constellations connect when he smiled, you were sure your heart exploded into a thousand celestial galaxies when he finally asked you out. You had fallen in love with Astraeus himself.

The only person Gojo seemed to love even half as much as he loved you was Suguru. The two boys beyond inseparable. Suguru would talk about astrology and you could see the celestial bodies in Gojo's eyes dazzle with adoration. You couldn't blame him. Suguru had a charm to him that made it impossible not to fall into his orbit. It only felt natural when Gojo suggested Suguru officially join your relationship.

You remembered the countless nights you had spent cuddled between your loves, watching movies until the early morning light. You remembered how in love Suguru was with the moon and how fascinated was with the stars. Spending entire nights out under the glittering sky on full moon evenings, dancing and laughing and falling in love.

You remembered the first time you saw the luminaries in Gojos eyes explode, marking the inevitable heat death of your universe. When word of Suguru's betrayal came out. You saw entire galaxies collapse in real time as he coped with what felt impossible. It wasn't the last time you saw the black holes form there.

You though they would never glimmer again after Suguru died, By Gojos own hands no less. You didn't spend the nights under the stars anymore. Instead they were spent at home, with him curled into your side. The stars weren't in his eyes anymore, they were glimmering in his tears. Nothing you did seemed to help. He needed time.

He slowly recovered, though his eyes never dazzled quite as bright as they used to. He recovered, and you recovered with him. He found joy in new things. In raising his son Megumi, in teaching and leading his kids to creating a new world for Jujutsu Society. He found a purpose beyond just being the strongest. You swore the stars in his eyes dazzled exactly how they did the first day you met him on the day he asked you to be his bride.

It was the last time you would ever see the stars. You remembered taking comfort in the soft glitter of his eyes when he told you he would win, and then feeling impossibly betrayed when he never came home. You couldn't cope. The sun had died, the universe had proven it's self to be cold and uncaring.

That is until you the full moon. It was weeks after Satoru's funeral, and by all means you had plans to just ignore it, finding it almost too painful without your darlings. And yet, once the time came, you found yourself drawn into it's orbit.

You swore you saw those stars smiling down at you. The ones you had fallen in love with all of those years ago. You just knew, some cosmic comfort assured you, Satoru was okay. You could hear Suguru in your heart. "Thank you, for fixing what I broke. I'll take care of it from here Darling."

You knew they were okay. And one day, you'd see them again. But for now, at least you still had Satoru's stars in your life. And if you ever missed him, you had the entire galaxy to remind you he was never truly that far away.

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

I'll love you better when I'm dead

(chapter 206 from Sanzu's POV)

(tragic MuSan drabble)

(link to ao3 in case some one preferes to read it there)

First of all...I'm sorry for this (not really but yes a lot at the same time, but I did this to myself too). An evil snail shared with me this AMAZING AND BRUTAL essay on Sanzu & katana-chan and reading the last pages about Mucho, this fic happened. So first of all...

GO, READ THE ESSAY NOW!

Summary: "We are both dying here today, captain."

[or why Sanzu looses his grip]

Warnings: Manga Spoilers. Major Character Death (chapter 206, duh). Hurt/No Comfort. Like for real, comfort has been slashed with a katana and is sinking in the bottom of the ocean.

The title is from "Love you better" because I listened in a loop for two days while reading the essay and writing this.

Oh, I played with Sanzu name (again, yes) but this time doing a full Jinx, ooopsie!

(English is not my first language, so be nice please 🙈)

It’s been six months since the Kanto Incident. Six months of planning for this day, of imagining how he’s going to punish that damn traitor. Of pretending his whole body doesn’t ache at the idea of killing the only person that made him feel like he mattered.

Haruchiyo is good at that, at hiding his true feelings from the world, lying to himself as much as he needs as a way of achieving it. He’s good at rationalize the overwhelming whirlwind of emotions that threaten to flood his mind all the time. He’s used to repress the pain, keep his anxiety at bay, bury all of it next to the memories he can’t face without having the need to scream and break everything at his reach (including himself).

Six months that seem to crumble the second his captain’s eyes light up when he spots him outside the detention center.

The ride is dominated by silence, that only breaks with Muto’s simple questions about how he’s been doing during this time. Genuine concern plastered on the face he’s supposed to hate. Haruchiyo wants to laugh hysterically at this, the irony that even now the older boy is only worried about him. Instead, he just gives short answers, knowing the other won’t push his boundaries.

They are finally at the wharf and his resolve flatters for a moment, overwhelmed by a kindness that he forgot how warm it feels.

“I’ve been waiting for this day...”

Haruchiyo trails off, talking mostly to himself. His hands grip the hilt of the katana, steading his inner turmoil with the reminder of why he’s doing this. The tangible proof of his vow, of the promise that gives him purpose. Wielding it with years of practice, preparing himself to strike a fatal blow.

‘Is that it? Is that the only reason I’m doing this?’

He hesitates, consciously loosening his grip on one hand and landing a sloppy cut that buys him some precious seconds.

“You damned betrayer!”

‘Liar, you made me think I could trust you, made me feel safe, seen. How can you say you love me when you couldn’t tell your treason would rot everything we shared?’

“Sanzu...?”

Muto looks at him in shock, trying to stop the bleeding with his hand and falling on his knees. He’s the perfect image of bewilderment, like he can’t comprehend what is happening, why is happening.

“I’ve been fooling you all along.”

‘I’ve been fooling myself, pretending this never meant anything to me. Pretending you never meant anything to me.’

Haruchiyo keeps talking, winning some time in order to collect his thoughts, to understand his own feelings in order to let them go and fully put his heart on the second hit.

“Remember our conversation that day when we were playing shogi? I said it, right?”

‘Do you remember how you told me I also mattered? You made me yearn for more, you were the first person that taught me to be selfish, to listen to my own needs.’

It’s almost ironic, realizing killing Muto is a sick way of putting himself first. Realizing this is personal.

“Protecting the king is the priority. You betrayed Mikey, didn’t you?”

‘You betrayed me, didn’t you?’

He takes off his mask, the scars reminding him of his place, letting go the faint illusion it could ever be somewhere else. That it could be next to his captain. He can’t forget it again, can’t keep hiding his devotion behind his craving for affection.

A sadistic grin on his face. That’s the new mask he’s going to show to a world that will never be the same for him.

“Now it’s checkmate.”

This time the cut is fatal, slashing a lot more than flesh and bones and severing the ties between them.

‘We are both dying here today, captain.’

Somehow, Muto hears the words he never says. But his will be the only tears shed, no one else will mourn the Haruchiyo that knew genuine love.

Sanzu can’t allow himself to grieve. He can’t be weak again, these seconds that felt like ages will be the last entertaining the idea he could be more than a loyal knight to his beloved king.

He made a promise and Sanzu is willing to do anything in order to fulfill it. Even killing a part of himself forever. His weakness, the love that tempted him to break free of his sacred vow. In a twisted way, he can’t avoid thinking how fitting it feels burying it with his captain.

Haruchiyo is dead.

Only Sanzu prevails.

[sry-im-still-deciding]

Final Goodbyes (Limited Life Fanfiction)

[written after session 3, don’t know how the series ended, just thought of this at 3 am]

They were running out of time.

They always had been. But it was much more apparent now. At first, it was nice, relaxing, even. They died with little consequence. They just lost an hour or so, so insignificant then. They didn’t fear death. But now, their timers were just running out. Not death by other players, or mobs, or fall damage. Just the last of the sand falling through the hourglass.

That’s how the Clockers lost Bdubs. Impulse had killed him, leaving him with only a few minutes left. He barely even made it to Entertainment Rock to say his goodbyes.

Scar and Cleo stood there now, planning. Trying to find ways to get more time, to stay in the game. The constantly ticking, red timer in their vision making it hard to think. Trap this, kill them. Get more time.

“Scar! Scar!” A familiar voice from behind Scar. The overwhelming panic in it was less familiar.

Scar turned to see his friend sprinting towards him, like the grim reaper itself was on his heels.

To see his lover’s face streaked in tears.

To see his enemy unarmed and vulnerable.

Grian almost knocked Scar over when he ran into him, even though he was much smaller. Scar could feel his friend’s body trembling.

“Grian? What’s wrong-” Grian cupped Scar’s face and cut him off with a kiss.

The kiss was like ones they’ve shared before, passionate and full of impossible wishes and unachievable dreams.

But they had time for those kisses.

Grian broke away and instead wrapped his arms around Scar’s neck. Scar’s arms instinctively settled around his lover’s middle. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so, so sorry, Scar,” Grian gasped between sobs. “I’m sorry, and I love you, and I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to hurt you, Scar. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Scar’s eyebrows scrunched in concern and confusion. “What-”

“Shh,” Grian cut him off again. His grip around Scar’s neck tightened a bit, like there was someone trying to separate them. “Just- Just hold me.” 

So Scar did. He held his enemy like nothing bad had happened between them. No death, no abandonment, no betrayal or heartbreak. Just them, holding each other. Like they used to do. When they had all the time in the world. When they could decide when it was over.

Grian’s body went limp in Scar’s arms.

Scar fell to the ground with a sob.

<Grian died>

They had run out of time.

[themculibrary]

Tony Stark Pairings Masterlist

a master’s treat. a pet’s game (ao3) - meowrails tony/stephen E, 7k

Summary: Stephen grows ears and a tail, and gives himself a magically induced heat.

Tony sees a long night ahead of them.

And The World Moves On… It Has To (ao3) - Teamironmanforever natasha/tony T, 157k

Summary: This fic is set Five Years after the events of Civil War.

———

The New Avengers, headed by Tony Stark, have finally established themselves in the world, working closely alongside the UN to maintain public trust. The team has managed to create a close-knit bond, working together to forget the past. However, when Thanos comes to threaten the earth, the Avengers will be forced to face some old ghosts when Steve Rogers and his team of renegades are called in to work with Tony’s team.

The two teams will be forced to face their pasts to work together to save Earth.

Anew. (ao3) - IViv tony/stephen M, 130k

Summary: In death, there was no glory, no redemption, no salvation.

Only darkness and ice—or that was what Tony thought. He closed his eyes in a Siberian bunker and opened them again on his 41st birthday, with War Machine flying into the distance.

Asgard’s Throne (ao3) - The_Winter_Writer tony/thor N/R, 3k

Summary: There was a first time for everything. Tony had fantasized about this, imagined it when Thor had first started courting him, but he’d never believed he would find himself seated on Asgard’s throne in such a way.

darkness will be rewritten (ao3) - princessironspider natasha/tony N/R, 109k

Summary: Peter is Tony’s biological child.

Natasha Romanoff has been married to Tony Stark secretly for years.

What would the movies be like if this were the case?

Debts (ao3) - d_aia tony/t’challa M, 59k

Summary: In which Tony saves T'Chaka, T'Challa is grateful, and they both are all the better for it.

Falling Into You (ao3) - sabrecmc steve/tony M, 53k

Summary: Tony and Steve end up as fuck buddies after the events of The Winter Soldier until Steve calls it off. When Loki’s spell wipes all of Steve’s memories since the last time Loki was in town, Tony decides it will be so much easier to just not tell Steve they had something of a relationship. Spoiler: It isn’t.

Or, how Steve fell in love with Tony and forgot about it, and how Tony fell in love with Steve and realized it.

Five Times Bruce Knew Exactly What to Say (ao3) - storiesfortravellers bruce/steve/tony T, 6k

Summary: “When Steve was a kid, he hated being rescued….”

Eventual Steve/Bruce/Tony.

five times pepper potts took care of tony stark (and one time tony stark took care of her) (ao3) - zauberer_sirin pepper/tony T, 5k

Summary: In Pepper’s defense she really did try to keep things professional.

Have I Changed? (ao3) - katling tony/stephen T, 141k

Summary: I liked you more before you met the Avengers.

It’s an offhand comment that Tony wasn’t sure he was actually meant to hear. But he did and he doesn’t know what it means. Lucky for him, Rhodey’s got an answer for him.

How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful (ao3) - Takara_Phoenix loki/tony E, 105k

Summary: Post Civil War, Tony has to build a new team of Avengers.

Aside from new recruits, there are also two well-known Avengers that return to Earth – with a ship full of refugees. New and more functional Avengers rise from the ashes of the old and new alliances, new friendships and even new relationships are formed.

Though the biggest wild-card proves to be Loki, not entirely unexpected.

However Sweetly It May Storm (ao3) - KimchiKitty7 bucky/steve/tony E, 30k

Summary: After Civil War, Tony Stark is trying to pull his life together and deal with the betrayal and abandonment of his team. One night he goes upstairs to find Steve Rogers in his penthouse, and is ready to try his hand at throwing him out the window. But things aren’t always what they seem. Can they get it right this time?

love is like a stubborn youth (ao3) - owlvsdove pepper/tony T, 9k

Summary: The long-winded story of the meeting, hiring, working relationship, courting, and comedy goldmine that is Tony Stark’s relationship with Pepper Potts.

Natural Talent (ao3) - 27dragons, tisfan bucky/tony E, 47k

Summary: Bucky is Boss of the Commando territory, carved out of Hydra’s territory with blood, tears, and sweat - mostly his own. He has a reputation in other territories for being hard and ruthless, but his own people know him as a generous, considerate leader. He protects his land and his people, but otherwise keeps his head down. He has no intention of getting embroiled in any of the other territories’ disputes. That is, until Bucky finds himself in possession of a beautiful companion and learns that the man is far more than he appears.

one hell of a show (ao3) - MillyVeil pepper/tony E, 44k

Summary: Tony gets kidnapped for ransom and Clint gets nabbed with him. It’s rough for them both.

Perfect Soldier (ao3) - orphan_account steve/tony, bucky/steve/tony E, 5k

Summary: Immediately after Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Steve enlists Tony to help him fuck a mind-wiped and perfectly compliant Bucky Barnes.

Sharpen Your Teeth (ao3) - STARSdidathing loki/tony M, 369k

Summary: A betrayed Tony Stark leaves the Avengers. He’s angry and bitter but he’s not about to stop being a hero. The problem is that not everyone is happy with his decision.

spit your tongue out (ao3) - deathsweetqueen tony/sam E, 5k

Summary: Sam is the last to come out of the Quinjet when it lands, and he looks just as handsome as he was the last time Tony saw him, a little thinner, a little wearier, more lines in his face that comes from exile.

His lungs are in his throat the entire time, and when Sam finally looks at him, his face hollowed out, he’s absolutely terrified of what he might say.

Sam doesn’t say anything.

stress relief (ao3) - romanoff steve/tony E, 84k

Summary: They don’t love each other. They barely even like each other.

The Guardians (ao3) - GremlinSR peter quill/tony M, 35k

Summary: Tony is pulled out of his funk after the Civil War by actual space aliens when they come to warn him of an impending attack. Now he’s building a new team, going on adventures with his new space friends, and generally just moving on.

When Team Cap comes back, they’ll find things are different than how they left them.

A salty ‘Tony doesn’t need the team back’ post Civil War fic.

Wrecking Balls (ao3) - Bourneblack bucky/tony E, 87k

Summary: Bucky Barnes is trying to make enough money as an escort to take care of his sister after she loses an arm in the war, and Tony just wants to feel a semblance of control after aliens try to attack New York. They happen to find each other and strike up a mutually beneficial arrangement (sugar, sugar), but is their chance meeting really just coincidence?

[mobius-m-mobius]

Pt 2:

(Okay I'm sorry this length is actually a bit absurd. As you can see my mind is SPINNING and this may have gotten. Out of hand. Please do feel free to ignore me, I promise I won't take it personally 😆😆)

So here’s the thing. In Loki and Sylvie’s first full episode together, I read the nexus event as being Loki experiencing self-love for once in his existence. Until events unfolded and I sighed and resigned myself to the inevitable heterosexuality of fit all. But.

Consider it from Loki’s perspective. You find yourself caring for this person who is and isn’t yourself. And it’s nice, at the end of all things, to care. Then the most emotionally intelligent man you know is insisting you’ve fallen in love with her. And gosh golly gee that is NOT what you thought was going on there, but you’re new to this whole letting yourself care schtick—how would you know?

Then, a miracle—against all the odds in the universe, Mobius decides to trust you after all. To fight by your side.

And within seconds, it gets him killed.

It feels like everything is over, and you don’t understand why. But it isn’t. The world is still falling apart, and Sylvie is still trapped, and whatever the way in which you care for her, you do care. And Mobius—he is dead. And nearly the last thing he said to you was that he thinks the love between you and Sylvie could save the universe. So what else can you do? You have to try. For both of them.

So you go to Sylvie, and it’s hard to get the words out, and it doesn’t feel quite right, but you try to tell her—

Your maybe universe-saving hopefully-actually-true love confession is cut off, and things get a bit wonky after that. And in the meantime there is another miracle—Mobius is alive after all.

But the universe still isn’t saved. And Mobius isn’t dead, but you thought he was, and you’ve been so viscerally reminded that to love is to lose. And anyway—before his seeming death the last thing Mobius said was that if he could go anywhere, it would be to his own life. Those scant moments when it seemed you might move forward side by side were illusion indeed. Mobius has a life of his own, in which you have no part.

So you turn to this other self, and say, ‘will you stay will me, after?’

She isn’t you. But perhaps she’s near enough to stay. No one else will.

Then you have the Sylkie kiss, which frankly imo barely counts as evidence on its own. When Sylvie finds out about Mobius’ nexus event theory she immediately goes to Loki to say ‘yeahhhhhhh so lets not do that bud … hey did you notice how much Mobius cares about you? 😃” Lok got a little confused, but Sylvie doesn’t seem, to me, to ever have thought her feelings for Loki were romantic. And when she kisses him, it’s a betrayal. Giving him what he seems to want as a distraction for the sake of her own ends.

And so he can’t trust her, and she won’t trust him, and there is no safety in running to himself to avert his loneliness. And he kissed her, and the universe isn’t saved.

And the lonely god runs straight on back to Mobius. And he might have still been sorting his head out a bit in the first two eps of s2, yet. He never leaves Mobius’ side again. Not until it is only way to save him. Not until he has spent centuries searching desperately for a way to stay by his side.

Wouldn't dream of ignoring you, absolutely love hearing the thought process people go through while watching or rewatching the show (starting another rewatch of my own soon!) and found myself noticing many of the same things you've mentioned especially regarding Sylvie as a representation of Loki coming to terms with self love for the first time which then led to the actualization of forming the kind of emotional connection and openness with Mobius that romantic love can build on.

Will reply to both parts of your ask here (linking part 1 just in case anyone hasn't seen it) and absolutely believe you're right in that while Loki would've always had potential escape from the methods and mistrust of the TVA in the back of his mind, he was very rapidly starting to separate Mobius from being part of the collective because there were too many genuine moments building between them to ever be in line with what the TVA would normally allow.

(adding a read more bc, well, it's me so we know this is getting long)

The shot in Roxxcart that lingers on Loki watching Mobius walk away after their discussion of trust always stuck with me because at that point I was under the assumption Loki was grappling with awareness the mission could be an opportunity of escape and for the first time didn't actually *want* to leave but had no idea how to process the feelings that had developed from being in a partnership of mutual respect and further taken a hit with the reminder that Mobius is still a major part of the TVA, and no one at the TVA will ever fully trust him.

Funnily enough even though it's kind of a running joke that Mobius had fallen for Loki before they even met (and he absolutely had 😅), the fact that it really was something more always came across as almost subconscious for him?? Loki knew what they had but panicked, never having experienced anything of that level before and not knowing what to do with any of it while Mobius has repressed his feelings about, well, everything for so long just to cope with life at the TVA it's hard for him to picture anything outside their rule.

I never saw Loki taking off after Sylvie as anything more than the chance to escape what could, or in his mind at that moment couldn't, grow with Mobius while taking a perfect opportunity to explore curiosity on his part as to who this is, whether she's useful, and how she connects to being a Loki and from that point on we continue to see in his interactions with Sylvie they mirror each other at various stages of life.

If anything his clear hesitation at leaving Mobius definitely made the betrayal sting that much more, which is why Mobius lashed out so openly during the next interrogation without even bothering to hide his hurt and I've always thought the moment where Mobius calls him out for being a bad friend in front of the guards is when it actually clicks with Loki that he may have ruined something big, something important between them if Mobius is willing to not just admit to them having a real connection in front of people who would almost certainly report something like that but consider him a friend to have trust in for the time in his life. So he risks it all trying to convince Mobius to trust him one more time and thinks he failed like usual, only to have Mobius come back with faith in who he can be, faith Loki doesn't feel he deserves but gladly takes which leads directly to Mobius getting pruned trying to protect him.

And I love how you phrased this section because exactly, Loki is so completely lost and torn apart in a way like never before after watching Mobius die. Sylvie is the only anchor to anything left, and Mobius had just (misguidedly, but still lol) told him the two of them could make a difference so that's exactly what Loki tries to do but every time he attempts to involve some level of emotion like the possible confession before also getting pruned or discussing their nexus event it's immediately cut off and for good reason; because that's not who those feelings are meant for. It's important to note as well that when Sylvie tells Loki how much Mobius cares about him, it isn't brushed aside or joked about but instead allowed to land and breathe in that moment because they know how true it is, but also that Loki isn't ready to face that yet.

Then at the citadel (and didn't s2 go a long way toward erasing pretty much all the implications meant here besides the fact that they'll never see eye to eye 😂) Loki and Sylvie immediately clash, with both of them openly wondering why they can't trust each other. Loki's frustration is clear because if he had been talking to Mobius instead they could take some time so things wouldn't have reached this point but he isn't, so he and Sylvie come to blows.

In my opinion Sylvie had never seen Loki in a romantic light either or even wanted to consider the possibility, but she did notice his constant struggle to reconcile feelings that did exist for Mobius and took advantage as a distraction and mirror to the Roxxcart grocery store divorce which leaves Loki confused and alone, processing what's just happened as he realizes despite everything his trust in Mobius has never wavered and never will. He races towards him only to finally know what it does feel like to look into his eyes and find that trust fully missing, so once he gets his Mobius back he spends almost every moment of s2 as close to his side as possible until he's forced to give him up, but as you said not until he's exhausted centuries seeking a way to stay. It's clear both of their endings are to be left wanting and waiting which is the most tragic way to have Lokius confirmed but we can only hope sooner rather than later they have a chance to work their way back to each other 🥰

[femalehieronymusbosch]

how special friendship is so pure and so sinful at once, it feels like poison fr, you were right. it's like 1 season cesare and lucrezia, you know where it's going but it hasnt yet, and their love is as pure and all consuming as the love of god

i see you're a person of culture as well! i didn't see similarities before but now you mention it i can't unsee - their scenes together have this tunnel-vision on each other and slow honey-like quality as if the time stops when they're together. check! their desire to compare themselves to historical figures too. check! they have enchanting love theme that plays over their scenes too. check! however, notice how Georges and Alexandre's theme is quite sombre and reminds more of season 3 "Cesare and Lucrezia spend the night together" rather than season 1 "Cesare and Lucrezia's love theme (by the fountain)". and the whole vibe you describe so well, of course.

Georges is dreamlike romantic hero, Romeo, beautiful, elegant, noble, softspoken, with patrician bearing and quiet charm, Alexandre is cute and soft but lit from within with his unbreakable spirit, he truly has “not of this earth” charisma, fire burning too brightly is destined to went out quickly. Their first date is dreamy, sweet, cute… the way they instantly cling to each other! The moment when they exchange blood is subtle eros incarnate, Alexandre’s gaze is full of love and tenderness as he looks at Georges licking his blood, and Georges’s enigmatic and sensual flutter of eyelashes as he looks down… Humans are equally body and soul, true love is both heavenly and earthly, you know.

Alexandre’s unshakeable confidence in Georges’ feelings, he knew that “you love me and I love you” before they ever spoke to each other from glances alone, “glances that are like kisses, and words are like caresses” he’s sure of it and he won’t back down. Only in childhood we can ever be this devoted, without considering anything else. That’s why after Georges’ presumed betrayal he’s got nothing to live for anymore. Georges is older that’s why he can see the benefits of pretending to comply, to lay low, to play along with well-meaning holy fathers (and they do mean well and while being nosy and insistant, that’s their job, they’re teachers, parents entrusted these boys to them).

Georges no matter how much of a lovesick poet he is, lives in the real world, while Alexandre doesn’t, he’s uncompromising, it’s either love or death for him, and if Georges doesn’t love him… with Georges’ love Alexandre was willing to be against the whole world, but if Georges has forsaken him… As father Lauzon says “give me back his soul, it was yours for too long”. And gives Georges a photograph of Alexandre, taken before he was wounded and forever changed by love, “when his heart was untouched. when there was nothing, no one”. Love for Georges was his religion. One shouldn’t look for love and death, for they find one on their own. Georges was looking for love, he wanted to fall in love and tried it with Lucien first, when he was shot by Amour’s arrow at the sight of Alexandre, and Alexandre was looking for death when the love he thought was as strong as death failed him.

They properly meet on a train but even before they’re introduced to each other they already know they love each other and are connected by the string of fate. Are you acquainted? – No, but we are in love. they speak with their eyes, melting, basking in their shared feelings. They’re saying words, but they don’t need them, it’s just a lovers’ meaningless babytalk to enjoy hearing each other’s voices. You love me and I love you, we’ll be united forever, run away together and don’t care for anything else, I will never forsake you, I don’t care if we’ll be caught, as long as we are together and never separated… murmurs like an endless stream. There’s no internal torment, they instantly give themselves to each other. I like the way Georges always positions himself lower as if putting Alexandre on pedestal, sitting/standing on the stairs slightly below to look up at him with adoration. When father Lauzon catches a whiff of Georges’ lavender perfume on Alexandre’s hair... What implication is more damning, the gifts – exchange of perfume and perfumed locks of hair, or frolicking together in a haystack?..

Book’s moment when Alexandre confesses “I love you more than life itself” is omitted, but there is another equally important one added. When Alexander sneaks into Georges’ music lesson, he looks at him with eyes full of tenderness and sorrow, and touches his hair with gesture too familiar. It’s when “I love you more than life itself” is palpable, even if unspoken. The realization, the surrender to feelings. It’s unusual and unsettling to see such an expression on the face of young boy, this expression is kind of reserved for romance heroines in specific moments when her hero is weak (wounded in attempt to protect her for example) and she’s looking at him slowly realizing how much she loves him, caresses his hair with “now it’s my turn to be stronger one and protect you” notion. And it’s after they got caught! So Alexandre is doubling down on their love. Showing that he’s unafraid. He felt that he can lose Georges and it made him brave, made him feel that they have to seize every moment they get. It made him understand himself and acknowledge the fact that he’s found the meaning of life now. And that meaning is Georges. It’s as dramatic and life-changing and deadly as only first ever love can be.

Then Alexandre's demise is ambiguous on purpose. Georges is left with this eternal bleeding wound, guilt. Was it an accident? If it wasn't - did Alexandre repent in his last moments? Was he saved and forgiven? Where is his soul now? Georges cannot even follow him in death because what if Alexandre did repent and went to heaven? And if he didn’t? And Georges won’t meet him even if he drags through life till the natural end? There's no answer.

[elmswriting]

Title: The Paradox of Love and Power, Revisited

Setting: Malfoy Manor, during the First Wizarding War

Lucius Malfoy stood in the opulent drawing room of Malfoy Manor, a setting of luxury that belied the tension in the air. Tonight, the manor's walls would reverberate with dark incantations and whispered conspiracies—the clandestine meeting of Death Eaters. He looked around, his eyes falling on the masks and dark robes strewn about, stark reminders of his double life.

Across the room, separated by a world of unspoken complexities, was Narcissa. She stood at the periphery, her ethereal beauty contrasting sharply with the dark room. She was no Death Eater, but her life was inextricably linked to one. It was a paradox, a cruel kindness that Lucius felt deeply. He wanted to protect her, shield her from this world of darkness, yet his actions exposed her to it.

Lucius' Internal Dialogue: I've brought her into a realm of danger, thinking it's to protect our family, our legacy. Is it bravery or foolishness?

Narcissa felt his eyes on her and looked up. His gaze was intense, a palpable force laden with unspoken emotion. It was a blend of power and vulnerability that sent ripples through her usual composure.

Narcissa's Internal Dialogue: He looks at me as if I'm his sanctuary, but what if I'm also his Achilles' heel? We're entangled in this perilous reality, and our love is both our armor and our vulnerability—an open secret.

Drawn together as if by an invisible thread, they found themselves standing closer, isolated from the ominous gathering. The air between them was thick with sensual tension, a palpable heavy lightness that seemed to defy the gravity of their situation.

Lucius' Internal Dialogue: To touch her would be an ephemeral escape, a sweet sorrow as the walls of reality close in again.

In a moment that felt both fleeting and eternal, Narcissa reached out and lightly touched his arm. Her touch was full of contradictions—a comfort and a torment, a simple gesture echoing their complex reality.

Narcissa's Internal Dialogue: I wish to assure him we'll survive this, but that would be a comforting lie. It's a paradox, a form of enjoyable suffering.

Lucius looked at her hand on his arm, a simple touch that shattered his typical self-assured thought patterns. He felt compelled to say something, to encapsulate the storm of emotions within him.

Lucius: "We'll find a way through this, Cissa."

Her eyes met his, mirrors reflecting the same mosaic of fear and love, hope and despair. It was a minimal exchange of words, yet it felt as if they had laid their souls bare—a gentle betrayal of his emotional reserve.

Narcissa: "I believe we will, but at what cost, Lucius?"

The question lingered, a form of organized chaos encapsulating the essence of their relationship. They were each other's sanctuary and their own battlefield, a paradox both bewildering and inherently understandable.

Lucius' Internal Dialogue: She's right, as always. The cost is an enigma, a riddle with no easy answer. All I know is I would pay any price to keep her safe—even if it endangers us both. A foolish wisdom.

Narcissa's Internal Dialogue: And I would follow him, wherever this dark path leads. An intelligent folly.

As Lucius returned to the inner circle, his robes swirling around him like a cloak of darkness, the contradiction of their existence was palpable. Their love was an oxymoron, a complex interplay of opposites—fear and courage, darkness and light, bondage and freedom. Yet it was real, as tangible as the war raging beyond their walls, a love that defied simple definitions. It was their precious bane, their lonely crowd, their sweet sorrow.

In a world increasingly filled with contradictions, they were the most beautiful oxymoron of them all. And as they faced an uncertain future, that oxymoronic love remained their one unwavering certainty.

Thus, in a room brimming with paradoxes, they stood as the most intricate—two souls deeply in love but ensnared by a world that might tear them asunder. A complex enigma that neither could untangle, and yet, neither wished to.

[squalodinoappreciationsquad]

Hey there! So, just thinking about these two again. If I can, I'd like to bother you for your headcanon for happened after the Ring Battles. Had they been estranged prior to the battles? How do you think they went about reconciling after being on opposite sides?

Hello! 💖

No bother at all, I would love to talk about my idiots to infinity and beyond!

SO.

For this particular answer I have A LOT to talk about, but I will try to be short and simple and hopefully make sense.

So.

First of all, I think that these two did not originally part ways exactly as friends, ESPECIALLY after the whole Cradle thing.

On one side we have a very angry Squalo shouting: I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON MY SIDE DAMMIT, I NEEDED YOU WHY DID YOU SIDE WITH THE VONGOLA?!

And on the other side we have a very sad Dino shouting: MY PEOPLE WOULD HAVE DIED ATROCIOUSLY, I HAVE WORKED SO HARD FOR WHAT?

S: AND AM I NOT YOUR PEOPLE?

D: YOU LEFT ME IN A DITCH TO FOLLOW XANXUS.

Et cetera etcetera, you know, divorce is happening and it's ugly.

Which definitely would not end up well, but as the Internet dads @ Cinema therapy say, "the more you are angry, the more you are stupid".

In any case there is a rift, but they kind of start walking on eggshells around each other, but like they don't exactly HATE each other, they are suffering from a bad case of miscommunication, mixed with being forced to choose sides and the supposed betrayal they suffered at each other's hand.

Anyway, Canon happens, the battle of the rings happens and Squalo nearly gets chomped down by a shark.

And Dino sees that it is not Yamamoto Takeshi, but Squalo Superbi. And Dino is:

he is definitely an ex friend and traitor, what do you mean i have gone into a full panic attack? what do you mean i have tried giving him cpr myself, what do you mean I have just gone into a frenzy because he is dying and my world is suddenly falling apart and I am having huge flashbacks to when my dad died?

In any case Dino starts feeling guilty, because maybe if back then he had used whatever leverage he had had as new Cavallone Decimo things would have gone differently, etc, in a neverending spiral of doom. In any case Dino feels as guilty as hell.

Days later Squalo awakens and Dino is beside his bed, looking all worried. And Squalo is like "why did you save me?" and Dino is like "it would have been trouble for the Vongola if you died" or something like that.

And to this day I DO NOT believe a single moment that Squalo believed in that pathetic excuse.

Anyway.

Days, maybe weeks pass and finally Squalo is not going around with the same nonchalant walk of Dr. House and he decides that he wants to find out why Dino has saved him, because Vongola Nono did want him, Xanxus and the rest of the Varia very much dead and they did not die because it appears that Iemitsu put in some sort of good word.

In any case, Squalo goes straight to Villa Cavallone and does not even wait to be announced. He storms into Dino's living room with the rage of a thousand suns and screams something like "VOOOOI WHY DID YOU DO WHAT YOU DID REALLY? I DO NOT WANT ANY PATHETIC EXCUSE, CAZZO!"

(In my hcs, Squalo cusses like a sailor)

And Dino in that moment does not have Romario, or Reborn, he is alone trying to deal with his own anxiety and just goes with "Because I feel GUILTY!!!"

S: Guilty of what

D: For not having your back all of this time, I am a horrible friend and I deserve death! And I also feel like a coward because you too were my people, along with my family!

Which makes them both shut up for like a good five minutes and finally prompts a sort of discussion. Not a coherent one, very much full of cries and screams, in which it is established that:

Dino very much thinks of Squalo as "his people"

Dino also is very much hurt that Squalo was willing to end a friendship over Xanxus and his ambition

Squalo very much offended that Dino would think that Xanxus would be the one ending their friendship

Squalo is very much hurt because if Dino thinks of him as "his people", then he should have sided with Varia and then the Varia would have taken care of anyone who dared hurting Dino's people

At the end of the day neither of them were to be blamed, they were forced to choose a side whilst being in the eye of the typhoon

S: is that everything or is there more?

D: NO, I also saved you because I was panicking and I did not want to lose you, literally.

S: what if I killed the brat then, what if I won the match?

D: I don't know, I panicked, I don't know what I would have done!

They understand each other very well, but they are an utter mess these two. They don't know how to communicate.

Cue Dino accidentally confessing undying and eternal love to Squalo, which takes Squalo by surprise. Cue Dino realizing what he has just said and wanting to disappear into the ground.

After all peace was never an option.

Well, at least something has come out of this mess.

Squalo will need to think of an answer, quickly. He has never prioritized anything about love, to him it was fight or die and now he is speechless. And he leaves.

It's gonna be up to Lussuria, who is somehow sensible to these things, and Romario, aka Dino's parental figure, to push these idiots to talk it out again.

And they do, agreeing to take things slow whilst they both figure themselves out.

Well. I hope you enjoyed the rollercoaster, dear anon. By the time they are TYL they are happily married.

Also, I am ace, but you are free to imagine them figuring themselves out in other ways, *winkwinknudgenudge*

And this was supposed to be short... Sorry!!!