#went on a 3 hour walk at the beach today and i basically wrote the entire fic in my mind

[cowboylikeyouu]

why can’t i just airdrop fics directly from my brain to my macbook like I DONT WANT TO ACTUALLY WRITE IT I JUST WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT AND TELEPORT IT INTO A DOCUMENT

[genius11rare]

AH ChitChat Notes 3 22 21

Chitchat 32221 with Jeremy , michael and matt ft disembodied voices of lindsay and maybe kaden , gus in chat and joins

Jeremy: Kaden spoke up because of donuts earlier… Michael: Jacks time is over now… but he will be on stream later. Jeremy: oh yeah schedule. Slight last minute changes doing Fall Guys first cuz S4 came out… me michael  lindsay and matt did a letsplay in it earlier today … gus will be doing fall guys this stream (eyyy)... oh yeah and i wanna impersonate what jack does. Matt: do it. Jeremy: and if you're watching on the site we can see your chat like FatHippoHippo wrote BET in all capitals … yeah i just wanted to get into the spirit and be like “what would jack do, what would he think is funny” and that was it. Lindsay: alsoone of those WWJD bracelets from the 90s What Would Jack Do… (matt: ive repurposed them) Jeremy: so how are you doing? Lindsay: good weekend i guess , just telling Matt we watched Big Hero 6 yesterday (Jeremy: aw hell yell) still an awesome movie , kids loved it. Jeremy: where they scared of - idk if he has a name the kabuki villain… *looking it up* apparently its Yokai… guess they never really say it cuz that's generic. Lindsay: that's VERY generic. Michael: IVE GOT TO TAKE THIS CALL *facecam becomes void* Jeremy: ok spoiler alert for Big Hero 6 but just looking at the wiki… it makes an audacious claim. It says “professor robert calahan OR ALSO BETTER KNOW as his villain name Yokai”... is it? Lindsay: well its based on a comic right so i guess canonically he has a name…. But to answer your question No they werent scared … anyway something we noticed upon rewatching is that 2 characters before a MAJOR event happens to the fistbump… but DON'T do the explosion… like oooohhh foreshadowing. Michael: not really foreshadowing if they keep doing it throughout the movie , if anything its foreshadowing that like… hell… whats the robots name - baymax learning it… not really foreshadowing the building explodes (gen notes MAJOR EVENT) … what blew my mind was that movie has a post credits scene. Jeremy: oh yeah was it like with the dudes father. Michael: Fred yeah! Remember remarking upon them entering the house theres a portrait of the dad and i just went “his dads just Stan Lee… just a portrait of him” Post credits scene and guys talking to painting and - wasn't paying attention but he like hits his head on it and the wall opens up to show a superhero room with paraphernalia everywhere and Stan Lee walks in like “son we got a lot to talk about” Jeremy: Chat asking about if i watched the wrestling PayPerView… remember how i updated you last that the guy died in the ring after being set on fire (Michael: lemme guess hes a zombie now) - yep exactly last night a hand reached up and grabbed someones leg , he came out of the smoke with a melted messed up mask so yeah…. Hes a furry (i think?) zombie clown Michael: hey wait a minute let me read the chat , someone named Gus said “whoa no idea there was a post credit scene”  “what is a fastfood restaurant combo wish would open” Lindsay: Miss my KenTaco Hutt… Michael: idk im usually just in the mood for SOMETHING , not looking to combine , only time is when i want a certain food and they don't have the same sides i want other places have . like Sonic is amazing for sides , apps and drinks… don't care for entrees , but if i could get Sonic sides at McDonalds or Taco bell or something.. Jeremy: guess in the same vein id combine Dairy Queen with a lot of places (Matt: i was about to say) to get a BLIZZARD with whatever. Matt: that's how it usually goes anyway , you get the food , you drive by the Dairy Queen and get a desert - you don't get the food at Dairy Queen cuz why - just why Lindsay: i mean theres icecream but there isnt really fastfood places for other deserts… like theres not really a Cake or Cupcake place (Matt: not yet *tilts head at camera like “you know what i want”* ) there IS the cupcake ATM Matt: alright checking the google… Michael: Matts checking the driving distance. Jeremy: another questions whil matts looking up cakes (Matt: oh i already have it) nevermind then. Conware asks “what is your fave controller for console and whats fave controller you own” Jeremy: Idk really… i know for a while everyones was the Elite 2 Michael: yeah just most comfortable. Matt: well that's like a specialty type… if its a stock one then the switch pro controller is pretty good. Michael: i mean i also have this 8Bit do SNES bluetooth controller thing , love it Lindsay: i love the nintendo switch controller grip… makes it feel like it curves comfy around your palms Jeremy: the XBOX sea of thieves one is great (Matt: i was about to say…) got a glow in the dark skull in the middle , RT is like a gold tooth , is partly see through Matt: and it comes with some exclusive stuff for Sea of Thieves Lindsay: yeah like Motion Sickness. Matt: i got one that's just a donut. Lindsay: gave me an idea… you know how theres Pez Dispensers (matt: heard of them) yeah and how you don't really even use them right you just eat the candy and play with the thing  ( *matt nods approvingly* yeah about right) what if we invent a controller where every once in a while it opens up to give a snack. (Matt: yeah like everytime you get an achievement, Jeremy: yeah i did good! Just go up to the controller and eat it) “You Are Good Boy” Matt: be funnier if it just throws at you “everyone have a fave seasons and followup do you like seasons where you grew up or where you are now?” Jeremy: i mean springs probably my fave its easy to be outside , not boiling hot nor snow everywhere… great time to camp and fish , falls cool with changing colors… texas is like “do you want REALLY hot or hot?”  Michael: i do really like Fall on the East Coast but its like - yeah i miss it and its nice to be there when it happens where its light jacket weather. I used to wear sweatshirts all the time - i don't bother with long sleeves in texas cuz i know im taking it off within 30 min…  never knew about the Water Cup thing until i lived in texas where restaurants just HAVE water cups… blew my mind its free  - because people will drop dead . noticed they just have this seperate stack of clear cups which is i guess like “i BETTER not see any soda in that cup THAT'S  A WATER CUP!”. I don't like it when its 105 degrees but i do like being able to just wear Tshirts most of the year and not dealing with snow Lindsay: i like Fall the most cuz like its blend of i guess i embrace the basic bitch stereo types of fall , want my pumpkin spice latee but ALSO i know halloween is coming and ive said before how THAT'S like my religious holiday so like… i come alive. Matt: probably fall , maybe winter. I don't go out much but fall is like the right amount of cool but not TOO cool. Jeremy: over the weekend me and kat went to a town called rockfort (i think?) which is like right on the ocean , the weather was a little cold for it , like 50 maybe and the sea breeze made it chillier… im not really a beach person just more water. You say beach and you think  like Boogie Boarding Bros (Michael: whoooaah boogie. Lindsay: beach volleyball) yeah .. id reather be on a rocky shore than a sandy beach. Michael: youd rather be like a mermaid sitting on the rocks *jeremy laughs loud* is that what you're saying Jeremy: yeah Matt: attracting sailors to their DOOM Lindsay: i gotta send you a link but theres this one TikTokker i guess that i watch that talks about that an eastern european beach she went to and was like “i cant wait to go on my beach outting yeah!” and she gets there its rocky , really windy , noones there and goes “ooh its really cold” Matt: depends the kind of beach to me… for me East Coast beaches SUCK *jeremy nods yep* its water you cant see anything in its terrible Lindsay: that's also texas beaches , all brown. Matt: its just one of those things where you get in the water and your like “ok… at anymoment i could be attacked by everything around me”  Michael: well that can happen on land too matt (Gen Notes WELCOHME TA JOISEY!!!) (paraphrasing jeremy here) Jeremy: theres this guy who flys a drone out over beaches into the ocean , and he released the footage… apparently due to there being a lot less people now theres just Great White Sharks that go relatively close to beaches now… there are times where hes filming people playing and like 10 ft away is a fucking shark ya know just swimming. And cuz they're really far away hed be like “id see it , film it , then go to a lifeguard and show it like “oh btw…” “ Michael: so you know 2 hours ago someone may have been eaten. MattL he should put a speaker on the drone to like announce the sharks like HEY! DEATH OUT THERE!. Lindsay: “whats that Dronie? Theres a shark in the water?!?” Jeremy: and it was funny seeing that behavior where everyonce and a while a shark would be swimming then someone would do something near it not seeing the shark and the shark just goes “fuck dat” and swims away MattL god dude…. So close to death *gus joins* Lindsay: oh you're the guy who was like Texas beaches have Tar Gus: oh yeah i grew up in texas and i thought all beaches were like that just “oh you don't sit on the tar”

[dandelliongirl]

What a year

2020 was..

The last time I wrote anything it was April, and now it is the 23rd of December and I’m about to go spend Christmas with my family. My last failed attempt at christmas bread is in the oven (for some reason it didn’t proof at all, I guess I put too much flour in..) and I’m cooking up some Christmas porridge on the stove. Watch me burn that in a moment too.. For some reason this whole autumn has been a very stressful disaster. I am still working from home and just logged myself off of work until the 7th of January 2021. Maybe because I’ve been working from home it feels difficult to get into holiday mode. At least we got some snow today so it looks beautiful.

Spring and summer 2020 were an absolute dream! With no responsibilities and the possibility to work from anywhere I got to spend so much time with my family and at our summer house away from the stress of the real world. I could not have dreamt of a better summer, and apart from strawberry picking (at an actual farm, not just from my own strawberry plants) I got to finish off my summer’s to-do list. I even made a cute little summer video with my old Canon EOS 100D (yes - I have a new Canon EOS 90D now!). Endless days of exploration, swimming, biking, sauna, gardening, having lunch with the midsummer roses, baking rhubarb galettes with my own rhubarb from the garden, biking to the ice cream van, SUP-boarding with dad and spending so much time outdoors made me happier than I could ever be. I cannot believe how many beautiful things COVID has given me despite it’s awful impact on the world.

The start of the autumn semester was chaotic to say the least. Practically all of our system integrations are behind one developer, and he happened to be on vacation when everything went down, and study rights did not transfer correctly. This lead to an insane rush of support requests across the board, and lots of extra stress. I was exhausted and scared after last autumn’s disasters and definitely didn’t need another one to start the new semester. I’m starting to seriously fear August... Other universities have tens of people in their technical support, and we have TWO (sometimes 3). In more positive news I was given a permanent job contract starting August, which was amazing, and makes me so grateful especially during a year when many lose their jobs and get laid off. I guess that also contributes to my levels of stress as I cannot hide behind “I just work here for another few months”, but I have to actually take responsibility and ownership as a permanent team member.

Basically a lot of things escalated at work this autumn because our entire staff is way over burdened with COVID changes and the systems not working in an ideal fashion. Because our organisation does not have clear and defined process ownerships many changes come alongside the implementation of new systems, which puts me as a system admin (and not a process expert) in an awkward position. Hopefully our organisation will be able to develop and reconfigure responsibilities with some outside help, but for some reason my hopes aren’t very high.. All in all the anger and frustration of the organisation has been reflecting on the way people treat us and each other and as an empath it has been very exhausting. Luckily my new team is amazing and I’m having so much fun working with them - even though we aren’t physically working together at the office. I cannot imagine how it would be if my previous colleague hadn’t left. I hope she is happy and thriving as well!

All in all what got me through the autumn was the fact that I got to work from home. Being able to take a 10-15 minute nap when things got overwhelming pretty much saved me. Also the fact that I can wear whatever, make tea or snacks whenever I need to and don’t have to spend time moving from one location to the other. My guy got his own computer desk and a proper chair, and we’ve both been working from our very crammed but cozy livingroom. Even though our hobbies have been on and off I’ve gotten a few moments to myself and have also gotten used to doing my thing even though he is always here. No big relationship drama apart from the occasional little argument.

Ballet and body combat got to continue in person for most of the season. The last couple of weeks of ballet classes were on Teams, and the last body combat class was on Facebook with the season ending a couple of weeks early, but other than that having hobbies outside the house definitely helped. I have also loved having my ballet friend stay home instead of studying abroad. Obviously it sucks for her because it has meant a lot of changes to her plans, but I’ve needed her so much, and enjoyed our walks, hanging out together, going to ballet and the hours we spent outside talking on our way back. Ballet classes have been pretty easy as we only go to pointe and adult classes, but at least we are having fun together, and I like to somewhat maintain my skills even though I am not improving by miles. It’s also easier for the body as I’m definitely no longer a teenager. Starting next year we’ll have a fancy new studio!

After the relaxing summer it has definitely felt like I don’t have enough hours in a day or days in a week to do everything I need to. I cannot believe how I used to do all this and so much more pre-COVID but I guess it’s all because Animal Crossing didn’t take anywhere between 30 minutes to 5-8 hours a day. Oops. Needless to say I have been loving ACNH even though the Halloween and Turkey Day events were a bit too easy compared to New Leaf. I have high hopes for Toy Day tomorrow (YIKES! TOMORROW?) even though I haven’t had to go through the usual process of noting down all my villagers’ wishes, which I definitely miss. I am sad the diy recipe RNG has been so bad though. I’ve spent a couple of days spawning balloons on my beach, and never got the big Christmas tree diy in time. Maybe I’ll get it tonight but it’s definitely too late for this year.. Maybe next year then. I didn’t struggle this much with the maple and mush series diys..

So yeah, last summer me and my friend finished our old photography project and I edited the last sets of photos to give the finished book for her as a Christmas present. I love the project a lot because the learning curve is so apparent between photoshoots, and I found my “style” throughout the process. My EOS 100D started to get weird electronical bugs and definitely wasn’t running very well anymore, so after insane amounts of research I decided to get the EOS 90D from a Black Friday sale. I still need a memory card and a new camera bag for it since it’s so much bigger, but I’ve already planned out some future photoshoots and the theme of the new project, which can be described as “Adventure”, “Expedition” or “Discovery”. I just hope my friend will have time to model for me because I’m yearning to go try my new camera out.

My boyfriend and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary with a friend couple who started dating a week after we did. We took an extended weekend trip to a national park, a spa and a rental cabin. It was so much fun and a very special way to celebrate 10 years together. Especially with an exceptional year like this one has been.

Yesterday me and mum went to granny and grandpa’s place to help with the last of their Christmas preparations, take over some food and sing Christmas songs. I took our old piano book with me and mum played the piano while we sang. Grandpa got teary eyed during a special song and it was so incredibly bittersweet. I don’t want to lose my grandparents but I know it won’t be long since they are both approaching 100 years. I am so thankful for them, and for the time I’ve gotten to spend with them. I just wish I could remember more of it. It seems so unfair that we never have enough time with all our loved ones, and there are so many childhood memories other people remember that I don’t. I wish I could go back in time and observe myself spending time with my grandparents to memorise everything. If I ever have children I’m going to take so many photos and videos to preserve as much as I can for them.

In my post from April I wrote that I had been looking at houses and vacant lots. Well, the house of a childhood friend of mine is listed and I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve arranged my mortgage and left an offer. The sellers didn’t accept my first offer so now I’m going to see the house again on the 30th to see if it’s wort raising my offer. I like the house but it’s definitely a bit inconvenient as it is a 3 storey house and way too big and expensive for our current needs. I just really like the area and it is one of the best houses in that neighborhood. I’m going to let things progress naturally though, and if I end up with the house then it was meant to be. If someone else makes a higher offer I won’t be upset either since we have no immediate need to move. It’s just a bit crammed in our current apartment and I would definitely like to have an actual office for my photography equipment, and a sewing machine/crafting space.

Looks like my christmas bread cracked pretty badly but at least it rose a little in the oven.. Hopefully it is edible. At least the one I made for granny and grandpa turned out better.. Time to go scarf down the last of my porridge (which I didn’t burn by the way!) and then try to get all my stuff over to mum and dad’s place. Christmas preparations this year have been crazy busy and I definitely regret not being able to enjoy the season enough but hopefully I’ll get more in the spirit tonight. I’m really happy with the gifts I got mum, dad and my guy this year (online and early in October/November to avoid the rush).

I’m hoping to make a new year’s post on here as well either before 2021 or during the first week. I just like writing things down so that I can look back on where I’ve been. :)

Happy holidays whether you’re spending them with your loved ones (in real life or through a video call) or alone.

[kyurilin]

2010-2019 Or The Overly Non Dramatic Story of How Kyuri's Decade Went

Technically this isn't a part of this decade review but I'm posting this on December 24th specifically because 10 years ago today I spoke to @mist-over-water on the phone for the first time after having known her for three years and I'm pretty sure we both cried

2010

met @mist-over-water for the first time in person. Took her to the beach where she promptly got roasted by the sun. Took her to the mountains. Took her out to practice driving in a local high school parking lot because why not. I cried so hard when she had to go home and God help me I'd only known her four years at that point.

Flunked a math class for the first time. Funny enough, it was because I'd been put in the advanced math courses for years and that was the year I both had a teacher I hated and could no longer reasonably fake my way through understanding math. Don't put your kids in advanced courses unless you're certain they can keep up with it people I only really was an advanced reader.

My dog Scruffy passed away :(

Started my senior year of high school

2011

Managed to graduate high school on time despite having to take 2 whole math courses during senior year (and with @mist-over-water 's who will now be referred to as Gabby because simplicity buddies sending me 'GRADUATE' messages so I'd have the motivation to go see her in person)

Got to go to England to see Gabby which, dream come true. Had a blast. Met the two precious nieces she had, her brother who's accent I couldn't understand, her mom who is one of the sweetest people, and her grandparents who I got to watch a lot of old British gameshows with.

Saw Wicked from second row seats in London.

Saw Cars 2 three times with Gabby which is why I'm still emotionally invested in Cars 2 because boy getting to see the sequel movie to the movie that ended up allowing you to cross paths with someone you really clicked with is AN. EXPERIENCE.

Cried when I finally had to leave because I was 18 and terrified of the future and didn't know when or if I'd ever see my friend in person again.

Started at community college in the film and video program

2012

Finished my first year of community college

Wrote my first original novel that will honestly never see the light of day. It's terrible ya'll

Through circumstances I still regret started losing my friendship with Gabby and boy do I hate who I was a person during that time

Started my second year of community college

2013

Worked on the X Factor as a production assistant.

Probably around this time that Gabby and I stopped talking which was better for us at that point. Still took an emotional toll to lose a friend that I'd known for 7 years at that point but in the long run we did need the distance (and I'm sorry to throw it all out here like this Gabby if you want it edited tell me I'm just putting it all out lmao)

Through a cosmic aligning of the universe by which I mean a special interest in both Minecraft and Achievement Hunter at the same time, I found a small Minecraft server that I could play on and met some really great people

Started my third year of community college

Oh yeah met @inspector-starfish from the Minecraft server for the first time in person, me and my brother stole her from her college and took her to the state fair with us.

2014

Started easing into talking to Gabby again (I remember the message with new baby Imogen!!!) Which was a blessing

I can't remember if it was 2014 or 2015 but at some point Gabby also hung out with me on the Minecraft server with my other buddies

Worked on Catfish as a Production Assistant for like 2 days and I still think I was fired lmao

My dad was arrested. Which is... The hardest thing to type out. Because everything before 2014 feels so distant because of the events.

He got put in jail and we bailed him out, but a month later he got arrested again and we couldn't bail him out this time.

God help me I'm so glad I had gotten back to talking to Gabby at this point I vaguely remember a sobbing Skype call between us.

I don't even remember what classes I was in at community college anymore that's how bad it is.

I basically dropped out though.

I stopped writing, I stopped drawing, I stopped... Being. That's really what it narrows down to. Only one of my real life friends knew what happened and I broke down everytime I thought about it so i'm pretty sure at one point I had a panic attack on my way to hang out with Friend A, who knew, and Friend B, who didn't.

I did start talking to @rhysispiecess that year. Through a post on here actually (we were also on the same Minecraft server but because I didn't really play that much that I remember after this whole thing I kinda forgot who he was).

I think (maybe???) I also met @belle-sourires and @youllthinkofsomething that year.

We moved from the house we'd lived in 13 years to a little rental house where we had the sweetest neighbors

2015

I spent a lot of time reading and crying in 2015 lmao

Also spent a lot of time talking to @rhysispiecess (the FNAF AU years God bless them for being a much needed distraction from real life)

Dad went to actual prison and boy that's an experience having to visit him there every week

We moved again this time to a small apartment

Got my first real job that wasn't being a production assistant (the same job I still have!)

Started to make actual attempts at writing again but struggled with it a lot

2016

For the first time since 2014 I actually wrote more than a simple one off story of the course of a month

Saved up my money and went to California to meet @rhysispiecess and @27thousandlizards.

Confused the shit out of Luke's (@27thousandlizards ) grandma

Was so tired I cried when I saw how little Corgi puppies are

Got to see @inspector-starfish and @youllthinkofsomething in San Diego where they were doing a robot thing as usual

Got to see the end bit of Route 66 cause wouldn't you know Rhys lives right near it (and as a huge Cars fan oh my God FATE)

Had an absolute blast with both Rhys and Luke and cried when I had to leave them because boy do I love friends

2017

Cars 3 came out and I transcended to a higher plane of being

Okay not really but I'm sure ya'll remember the days where I was mostly a Cars blog

100% I know I've said this before but all of the Cars movies have hit with specific messages at exactly the point in my life I needed to hear those messages so like. Poetic cinema.

Made some fantastic friends from those days

After 11 years of attempts at writing a redemption arc for a certain Cars character I finally wrote one and IT WAS GREAT

Cars 3 also managed to make me write again which has continued to be a struggle since 2014

Oh yeah became single again I was in a relationship but that ended TIME FOR ALONE (learned I'm still a terrible person who doesn't handle relationships well so hey not bad I'll leave people out of my overly anxious 'they must hate me' mentality)

2018

Fell out of writing again after the Cars 3 hype died down enough lmao

Got to meet @whipplefilter and @the-kings-tail-fin for a road trip around NC which was fantastic

Played way too much Nintendo Switch

Gabby got engaged and I absolutely cried for like an hour because how the fuck do you not cry when someone you've known for so long gets engaged (I'm still so happy for her @onetruejonsey seems like a really wonderful guy)

Oh yeah we moved again we have a real house now but the neighbors are redneck assholes

2019

Thanks to FNAF Help Wanted, I got whiplashed back into that fandom BUT I did start writing pretty regularly again. In fact I've written more this year than all the years since I stopped COMBINED. Which means I was both in the right headspace to actually want to write again as well as being able to keep myself focused on it.

Met Jodie Benson (ARIEL!!!!!!), Daniel Logan (KID BOBA FETT) and Christopher Sabat at GalaxyCon. Right. I went to my first convention despite being terrified of it

I cried like a bitch meeting Jodie Benson and she hugged me. I told Daniel Logan I'd had a crush on him as a kid and that Attack of the Clones was still my favorite Star Wars (which it is I wasn't lying) and he hugged me. Got to hear Sean Schemmel call Christopher Sabat out for being so friendly that his line was ridiculous which was great because boy did I not have enough money to meet more than three people. Christopher Sabat was fantastic too.

Went to DC with my 3 closest IRL buddies I've known since like 2008 and despite some arguments none of us killed each other. Nearly destroyed my feet from all the walking though. Don't know how we'd survive a trip to Japan which they all want to do.

Started formulating my next novel idea

It's been a long decade. Really the first half feels like it happened to another person.

I want to say, more than anything, if it weren't for Gabby I never would have had the courage to meet so many of my other online friends. She flew over here to meet me when I was 17 and she was 15 going on 16. We were so young and my dad and her mom worked so hard to make sure that we could actually meet each other and I'm forever thankful for that. I went across the ocean by myself at 18, an autistic disaster of a human, and somehow I didn't panic or get lost or anything. Without those experiences I never would have had the courage to do a lot of the things I've done since.

I'm still terrified of the future though. I have no idea if I'll even save enough money to go to England to see Gabby again (and God we actually need to talk more because I feel like a terrible friend ALL I DO IS SEND GIRAFFE PHOTOS). I don't even know what I want out of life.

Here's hoping though that I can continue to have some adventures and meet more of my online buddies in the next decade!

[everyday-effing-therapy]

26/07/19

Hello!

Sorry I lied to you about posting yesterday, which I clearly didn’t do. I’m not trying to force excuses here, but I was dead tired from the trip, needing to hop under the shower ASAP and also really bored with retelling the same story from the previous five days again and again.

Let me just start off from the very beginning.

Let’s start with 20.07. I didn’t post on that day, cause I had manicure in the morning and then I slept, packed and overall got ready. I was planning to post at night, but I knew I already wrote about the hiatus and besides, it turned out that I had to arrive at V’s house on Saturday and not Sunday. Her mom promised to drive us some way to the seaside, but we had to leave early in the morning, therefore it turned out I had to arrive on Saturday’s night.

On Sunday, 21.07, there was Su’s birthday, who is our best friend, so we decided to call her two minutes before midnight, not to let anybody hold the line. Su was already by the seaside.

When I arrived at V’s house it was about 11pm. She packed, we went on a walk with her dog, called Su and then didn’t go to sleep up until 3 am.

At 3 am, Su called saying that she argued with her boyfreind, Opal.

Basically, Opal and Silver arrived on Saturday, Su and Z were already there on a holiday and me and V were supposed to come on Sunday. The six of us were to live together for 5 days and then Silver and Opal were supposed to stay with Black, Gold and another guy for the next couple of days and us girls were supposed to come back home.

Opal and Silver tried to get on well with Su’s and Z’s friends from the holidays, but they’re from two different worlds and Silver and Opal didn’t really have fun. Which is, well, their problem, but then they were mad that Z started to come after a lot of guys and they kept on chasing her the entire evening, so that she wouldn’t do anything stupid.

They obviously had their hearts in the right place, but some peple will always do what they want, even if it’s dangerous and Z is exactly that kind of person. Besides, if anything, they should be mad at Z, but they decided to get pissed at Su. During her birthday.

Which led her to call us crying.

We calmed her down, but the next day, after the 2,5 hour trip with V’s mom, during which we listened to Ed Sheeran’s new album (about which I already talked about) and the 2 hour train trip to the small seaside town, the atmosphere was not that good. We eventually got the house, planned how we were going to sleep and because Su was mad at her boyfriend, he slept with Silver, I slept with Su and V. Z slept alone.

The first day was shitty. We argued a lot, Silver said some very rude things to me because he was tired and well, that didn’t end well. We finished the day by having a bonfire at the beach, but we had to finish that a bunch of hours later, cause we weren’t allowed to do so.

The next day was a bit better, we had more fun because of a bonfire. We went to the supermarket and argued again, because Opal and Z really wanted to throw a surprise birtday party for Z (who had her birthday on 21.07, they have already celebrated on 20.07 and then anther partty on 22.07) and me and V knew that she didn’t want that. Silver was against the idea as well. Fortunately, the party didn’t really work out and we spent the night together, but Opal and Su again had a problem, so we went to nearby city to clear our minds - just me, V and Su. We had waffles, walked the pier, got matching henna tattoos, bought books and ate dinner. After that we came home for that party, but Opal was mad big time.

We woke up at 2 pm on 23.07. We travelled to another city, walked around and had so much fun. That was a really good day, I had an awesome time with Silver and the rest, but when we came home my ankle got so swollen, I couldn’t walk straight.

Silver offered to carry me downstairs, we somehow got down and I got into the bathroom. I wondered whether or not to lock myself, cause I was afraid of falling down, but I decided that nothing bad could have happened to that ankle and I didn’t know whether somebody wouldn’t just barge into the bathroom without knocking. I locked myself, thank god, because Opal felt sick and since he couldn’t get to the bathroom, he threw up outside. Silver stayed with him half of the night, to make sure he was okay.

On 24.07 Gold arrived. We went to the beach since I couldn’t really walk. Almost everybody got sunburnt, but V had it the worst. After that, we ate dinner, went to the beach again to take some pictures and packed, cause the next day was the day of coming home.

We woke up at 25.07, ate breakfast, got waffles and left the house. Me, Su and V took the same train, but V left the fastest cause she was visting family by the sea. Me and Su had to travel for a long time and it was very tiring, cause we didn’t have seating spots, but thankfully, we got home.

After that I had to unpack, take care of my ankle and I fell asleep, cause I had my driving class in the morning.

I didn’t have any driving class during the last two weeks, so let me tell you, it was the absolute worst. I still feel so bad because of that, but I’m trying to forget somehow. Today, I also visited my grandma and soon, I’ll prepare myself to sleep.

If you asked me about how I felt during the trip, I’d have to admit that mostly okay. I didn’t worry about anyhing that I worry about at home, my mental health was better, but we did argue, which in turn made me cranky. The swollen ankle didn’t help at all, but it’s better now.

I realised that I don’t love Silver. He said that he wouldn’t pursue anything with any girl now, so I’m letting go and it does seem possible now, finally.

I do miss Black a lot. I told Opal that i wanted to go to prom with Black, when Opal asked me about whether Silver and Opal finally made the decision between them. I also told him that Silver asked another girl out and Opal was genuinely surprised.

So, there’s that. I think I’m going out with my friends tomorrow, we’ll see how that goes.

Today’s light I’d like to send to Opal. He’s a really nice guy and is in a not the best situation right now, which causes him to hurt. I like him a lot, as a friend, but nevertheless I want him to be happy. I hope all the guys are having fun right now.

And you, have an amazing night.

Love,

C

[somerandomwriter1234]

Riley and Maya: I Think I Wanna Marry You - Chapter 12 (Summer Camp Counselors Part 2)

*Author’s Note - Just know this story continues at first to be silly like the previous chapter and then takes a dramatic turn. Before anyone says this turn was just done for dramatic effect, just know this chapter and the next was based on a real event that happened to me at summer camp. Just saying.

The next day at camp, Riley was walking out of the woods as she said, "Okay girls. I found a great spot where we can make a camp fire and..." Riley then saw all of the preteen girls were swimming in the water with their clothes on as they splashed around and played games. Riley then walked over to Maya who was watching them and then said, "Maya. We were supposed to be finding wood for a camp fire." Maya then said, "I know. But Stacy tripped in the water, and then some of the other girls jumped in after her and... well, they just decided to start playing around." Riley sighed and then said, "Maya, we have a schedule to keep. We just can't do whatever we feel like doing." Maya then said, "Riley, relax. Sometimes you just have to go with the flow. Kids' lives are already structured enough. If you don't let kids try new things of their own choosing, they're never going to find their own identity. Just let them play for awhile, and then we'll maybe do your camp fire thing if nothing else comes up." One of the girls from the water then yelled, "Maya! Watch me do a hand stand!" Maya smiled as she said, "Wow. That looks great Rory!" Riley then raised an eyebrow and said, "How come you're the favorite counselor Maya? You didn't even think you were gonna like working here." Maya then said, "Eh. Things change. I guess I have a good natural ability to take care of kids. I did take care of you all those years didn't I?" Riley then made a small smile as she said, "Well... yeah, you did."

A few minutes later Riley was sitting on the beach by herself watching the young girls play in the water. One of the young girls then sat next to Riley and said, "Hey Miss Riley. Watcha doing?" Riley then said, "Just keeping an eye on you girls. And you can call me just Riley. So... you enjoying your summer so far Lauryn?" The preteen girl Lauryn then said, "Yeah. It's okay." Riley then said, "So... is this your first summer at this camp?" Lauryn then said, "Yeah. Last year I went to a history camp but I couldn't go this year because it shut down because not enough kids signed up." Riley then said, "You're into history?" Lauryn then said, "Yeah. Like early American history. I started getting into it when I was little reading those American Girl books, but then I wanted to go further so I started reading lots of textbooks. My friends at school think I'm weird that I collect textbooks." Riley then said, "Well they're missing out. History is a really cool topic. My dad teaches history. He always makes me bring a few history books when I go on a vacation or to camp. I actually have some of them if you want to read them later." An excited Lauryn then said, "Really? Yeah! That be cool!"

Hours later as darkness began to take over the sky, Riley and Maya were both carrying two jugs of water back to their cabin together as they talked. As they moved Riley said, "So I gave Lauryn those textbooks later and she was so happy. And it was all thanks to you Maya." A confused looking Maya said, "Me? Why am I responsible?" Riley then said, "Honestly... stopping to actually talk to these girls and find out what their interests are was never really on my detailed schedule of camp activities. By breaking free of the plan, I was able to get to know my campers better and provide one of them something that could actually help her in her interests and passions." Maya then said, "You see Riley. Sometimes you just gotta let loose and let the unstructured world do it's thing." Riley then said, "You're right Maya. For the rest of the evening, no more structure. Just let things go with the flow."

About an hour later: the preteen girls were all in sleepwear attire sitting around the cabin floor as one of the girls excitedly said, "So lets talk about boys." Some of the girls began to giggle as one of them said, "Okay. If you were going to have babies with one of the boys back at school, who would it be?" Riley and Maya who were sitting nearby heard what was going on and with wide eyes Riley began to sit up and said, "Okay girls. Maybe we should instead..." Maya then put a hand on Riley's shoulder and said, "Come on Riley. You said no more structure tonight. Just let things go with the flow. They'll be fine." Riley sighed and then said, "Carry on." One of the girls then said, "Okay. If I had to pick one boy here, it be... Bobby!" All of the girls began to giggle as one of them said, "No way. Well I would pick Edward. He's so tall and so hot." Then another girl said, "Well Edward may look nice, but Mark gives way better compliments. When I sent him pics of me in my new bra, he wrote the longest message telling me hot I looked. What about you Miriam?" The other girl Miriam then said, "I would so do it with Tommy. He liked this topless picture I sent him two weeks ago so much, that he actually asked me to send selfies of myself in the shower." Another girl then said, "No way? You mean you did a naked selfie?" Miriam then said, "No. I had lots of thick shampoo covering my body. But he may be getting a full frontal soon if he keeps being nice." Then another girl said, "Well I finally did a mirror shot of my back and butt and sent it to Johnny last week and he said he fapped so much to it, it made him..."

Suddenly Maya stood up and yelled, "HOLD ON! What is going here!?" The girls started to look a little startled as Miriam said, "We're just talking about boys Maya." Maya then said, "Yeah but... are you girls being serious!? Is this really how preteen girls and boys act nowadays? I mean I'm only 20 years old and things couldn't have changed that much since I was kid." Ryan then said, "Well, I mean, we're just talking about how we flirt Maya." Maya then said, "What you're talking about is NOT flirting! Flirting is making smiles and falling down near the person you like and asking them to help you up and giggling at them and asking coyly to sit with you at lunch and... basically NOT what you girls are doing!" Miriam then said, "Well maybe that's how girls flirted back in the day Maya but we're talking about how girls let people know they're in love with them today." Maya then said, "No Miriam. Getting a picture from someone that showcases their underwear or their butt does make them NOT make them think you're in love with them. You wanna know how I know what real love looks like?" Maya then grabbed Riley's hand and said, "Girls, this is my best friend Riley. She loves me. I know because growing up she invited me to her house all the time. She let me climb into her bedroom through a window whenever I wanted to just to talk. She tried to help me build a better relationship with my mom. She helped fight to keep the art program alive at our old middle school so I could continue pursuing my passion. And she actually set up an incredibly complicated plan to get her father's best friend and my mom to hook up so I could finally for the first time in my life: have a father who cared about me. That girls is the greatest example of a person who loves you. And because of how much she loves me, I in turn would do anything for her. I wouldn't do anything for just some random person who sends me some digital hoots and hollers at me because of how I look in a photo. My body is too good for that. And girls, your bodies are too good for that. And tomorrow, we're gonna do some sport activities so you all can experience that your bodies can do far more than just pose for the camera. Now go to bed and think about what I said!" All of the preteen girls then instantly jumped into their beds and turned out the lights. Riley then got up and stood next to Maya and put a hand on her shoulder. Riley then said, "Maya, I... I've never seen you get so..." Maya then said, "I'm okay. I'm okay." Riley then said, "So... I guess you're gonna start preparing tomorrow's agenda then?" Maya smirked and said, "Yeah. You know what Riley... as much as free time and going with the flow is nice... I'm starting to think a little structure for these girls actually wouldn't be so bad."

TO BE CONTINUED...

Upcoming Chapters For the Series:

-Chapter 13: Summer Camp Counselors Part 3 of 3 (Coming 4/7)

-A New Saga in the Riley and Maya Married Life Begins (Coming 4/14)

*Note - To read the entire series in one convenient location, click here - https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13229693/

[nashvilletonihon]

Let’s Talk About Culture Shock

Ok. I know what you’re thinking... “Rachel! It’s so good to have you back! I’ve missed you!” I know friend, I know. I say “life happens” a lot which is just as much of an excuse to make myself feel better for not updating as often as I should as it is legitimate reason for my lack of posts. (Especially because the last post I wrote I promised to write more...HA HA! Whoops!!)

That being said, remember when I first arrived in Japan and all of my posts were doom and gloom get me the f*ck outta here? Yeah, me too. Well, that was child’s play compared to the week I had. For the first time since I moved I experience very real and very genuine culture shock.

Now, you might be asking yourself what the difference between the culture shock I experienced a few months ago was and the culture shock I experienced this week is. I’m sooooo glad you asked.

Upon moving to a foreign country, the first several months are obviously very difficult. Especially if that country does not speak your native language. EVERYTHING is new and exciting and terrifying. You spend all of your time figuring out which markets to buy groceries at (and if you’re like me it’s three different ones), where to get your hair cut, how much time it takes to get to certain places, where the best restaurants are, if you should try new food based on the packaging photos alone...basically you’re just trying to survive. It’s a challenge but not necessarily a negative thing. Perhaps a slight inconvenience at most.

Fast forward to now. I’ve been here for 7 months and my life has fallen into a routine. I know when to wake up and how much time it will take me to get to each school, I know how much it costs to fill up my gas tank and where I can buy specialty foreign items like tortilla chips and popcorn. Things have gotten a bit more simple but by no means easy. Life is still a challenge but I don’t lose my mind every time I have to go to the grocery store now.

That was until this week...  

It all started Monday morning when I woke up not really feeling like myself. I  tend to dread the beginning of the school week because it means that I have to go to my base school (which I don’t exactly enjoy) and pretend to work for 8 hours instead of actually being in the classroom like I am at my visit school on Tuesday’s and Thursday’s. This Monday was no different. I decided to begin the day by asking my supervisor (who 100% does NOT want to be my supervisor) to contact the Board of Education to let them know I have been excused from attending a last minute seminar as my friends are in the country. After I very calmly and simply explained this information, he proceeded to print out a schedule for said seminar, hand it to me with a curt ‘’there you go’’ and proceeded to go about his business. Mouth agape I’m shocked I didn’t blurt out ‘’you didn’t understand a word I just said did you??’’ even though I was screaming it in my head. Shocked beyond comprehension I turned to my computer and with an amazing amount of grace, decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. The rest of day went the same as every Monday usually goes. I’m used to being underutilized at my base school and while desk warming isn’t exactly what I would like to do, I normally don’t mind because it means I get to study Japanese, work on lessons for my visit school, surf the internet, etc...I keep my head down and try to blend into the desk chair. However, after I left school on this particular Monday I found myself hung up on the feeling of being mistreated and ignored. I tried to shake it but was unsuccessful as I took it with me to my visit school the next day.

Tuesday was まま ma ma (so-so). I had a few classes, one of which I taught solo, and I worked on decorations for my English Board. Although nothing monumental happened, I didn’t have my usual 元気 genki (energetic) attitude as I tried my best to hype the students up for the activities while also keeping them from tearing the school down. The day, as a whole, was pretty uneventful, kendo and karate practice included. (Even if I was a little less enthusiastic for them than I normally am.) I went to sleep that night with a heavy feeling in my chest and a nonchalant, indifferent attitude in my mind I now know is the beginning of an anxiety filled depression spiral. (Wheeeeee....)

I arrived at my base school on Wednesday morning buzzing with anxious energy feeling like I’m not even in my own body but instead floating just outside of it. I decided to try and put that energy to good use by updating the English Board which still had Christmas decorations on it. (January was filled with good intentions y’all...) I’m freaking elbows deep in switching everything out with pieces of tape on all my fingers when one of my JTE’s comes up to me and timidly says ‘‘Will you be joining the class today?’‘ In her defense I am technically supposed to attend her class. In my defense, I am literally used as a human tape recorder, spitting out a few vocabulary words and watching the students lose their mind when I pronounce Worcestershire sauce. My time would have been better spent changing the English Board...but I went to class and quietly stood by the stove instead.

Once class was finished, I knocked out the English Board and went to study at my desk. It is at this point that another JTE asks me if I had ‘’done my homework’’. Eyes glazing over I blankly stared back at him asked ‘’what homework?’’ ‘’The list of books you are supposed to write down for me to help improve my English.’’ he says. At this point I begin to very vaguely remember the conversation we had in regards to this topic. I believe I mentioned that I would make said list whenever I had the time...but I digress. I quickly assured him I would make the list and leave it for him under his computer for his perusal tomorrow when I am at my visit school. That fire put out I begin to work on studying kanji when I become acutely aware of how hard my supervisor is typing. He’s putting in grades and every time he smashes the ENTER button it sounds like he’s trying to push it through the entire keyboard. I do my best to ignore it when he finished and moves on to grading exams. As he circles each right answer I swear he’s doing his best to leave a circle shaped engraving on the desktop. It’s incredibly (and unnecessarily) aggressive. When lunch arrived I swear he slurped his miso soup louder and more annoying than usual. Granted, I’ve noticed all of these things before but today they were amplified. Every sound, every action made me grit my teeth in frustration. By the middle of the day I was crawling out of my skin anxious. I was in the throes of major cultural shock meltdown. It was at this moment that I remembered I should probably e-mail my Prefectural Supervisor to follow up on whether or not the supervisor at my base school had indeed contacted the BOE like I asked him to. Lo and behold as I was finishing my e-mail, one from my PA pops up in my inbox. I open it to discover that she’s letting me know that said base school supervisor has NOT contacted them regarding my excused absence from the seminar. Balling my hands into fists I try not to slam them on the desk in the worst fit of work rage I’ve had in a long time.  

Instead, I begin messaging Jacob stream of consciousness thoughts:   

“I want to go home. Home home. Back to America home. I want my mom. I want to sleep in my own bed. I want to drive my own car. I want to drive on the right side of the road in my own car. I want to see people who look like me. I want to see people who don’t look like me but who aren’t Japanese. I want BBQ. I want a disgusting fast food burger. I want AMERICAN food. I never want to eat another Japanese meal again. I never want to see rice or sushi or freaking noodles EVER again. I don’t want to hear Japanese. I don’t want to speak Japanese. I want to hear English. I want to speak English. I want to go to the grocery store and know where and what everything is because I can READ it. I want to go to the movie theatre and see a movie. IN. ENGLISH. I’m tired. I’m over it. I’m done. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t do this anymore.”  

The entire time I’m going through this I’m doing my best not to lose my cool while sitting at my desk in the teacher’s room. It’s becoming increasingly more and more difficult. The teacher’s room is LOUD. Everyone is talking and laughing, calling to one another from across the room. To stop from screaming I bite the inside of my cheek so hard I draw blood. I’ve been messaging Jacob throughout the day and he’s aware of my current mental state. He’s doing the best he can while also working but I need air. I need quiet. I need to be alone. I grab my coat and race out the door.

I make the short walk to the コンビニ konbini (convenience store) across from my school where I buy a soda and some chocolate. I walk along the street toward the beach taking long swigs from my drink and angry munching my candy. I want nothing more than to be anywhere but here. I deep lungfuls of the crisp winter air. It’s chilly but the sun is out and the sky is clear. I lucked out weather wise. I do my best to clear my head and when I feel like I’ve been gone long enough to arouse suspicion, I head back to school. (Spoiler alert: No one noticed I was gone.) I’m not sure how but I manage to make it through the next 3 1/2 hours until it’s time for me to go home. I have to stop myself from sprinting out the door. As I walk to my car my friend, and fellow AET Natasha, messages to let me know that my request to attend Ichiba Elementary School on March 6th for their mini English Day has been denied because “I have classes”. (I will later find out that it’s Entrance Exams day and I more than likely don’t have to be at school period, much less in classes.) I get in my car and slam the door.

Jacob calls me on my way home as he walks to his bus stop. I sob like a baby. It’s the first time I’ve cried since October and it feels...good. I think I’d been bottling it up inside for a while now and having a gut wrenching, body shaking sob was soul cleansing. It wasn’t so much that I was sad, I was just so incredibly angry and frustrated that the only thing I could do was cry. I raged. I cussed. I shook my fists...and Jacob listened. Because he knew. The thing about culture shock is that it never truly goes away. It’s constantly there. But some days you’re better at ignoring it than you are others. And some days, heck, some weeks it all comes crashing down on you at once. Culture shock comes in waves. There are still days I want to pack up and go home. I miss my family and friends dearly. I miss the comforts of home and the things I’m used to. That being said, I’m beginning to create new comforts, make new memories. Mainly in part because of this guy:

A quick photo while celebrating 節分 setsubun (Spring/Bean Throwing Festival) at 吉田神社 Yoshida Shrine. SO. MUCH. GOOD. FESTIVAL. FOOD.

For those of you who creep my Instagram, you’ll have seen his handsome face a time or two before by now. For those of you who don’t, here he is. That mustachioed gentleman has pretty much been with me since Day 1. I met Jacob at the Kyoto Orientation Conference I attended 5 days after arriving in Japan. We became fast friends and as our friendship developed, so did deeper feelings. (He had them a lot earlier on than I did...for obvious reasons.) It wasn’t until our birthday (yes, we share the same birthday) that I realized “Oh sh*t. I think I’m in love with this guy.” Fast forward to four weeks later when I went down to visit him over the winter holiday and that little thought I had on our birthday had grown and solidified into a very concrete and very real feeling. I was head over heels 100% smitten. So before this post becomes another “doom and gloom” entry, I want you to know that not everything here in Japan has been bad. Not everything here in Japan has been terrible. Not everything here in Japan has been awful. (Contrary to the vast majority of my previous posts, I know.) Japan introduced me to the love of my life and showed me that a future here is possible...more than possible...a definite. 

Yes, culture shock is sneaky and culture shock is rude. It creeps up on you when you least expect it and turns the things you enjoyed into the things you resent. However, with the right mindset, the right friends and the right support system you can kick culture shock in the teeth and go about your regularly scheduled program. I’m fortunate enough to have the best kind of support system in the man I love who listens (to me rant), helps (me calm down) and advises (me not to take violent action) as need be. Seriously though, call me the luckiest gal in the world. 

I have so many more things to share concerning Jacob, our relationship and our future plans, but that is going to require a post all on its own. In the meantime, enjoy this photo of us being cute (and me with different bangs) while you wait.

Probably my favorite photo of us to date, here we are on 比叡山 Mt. Hiei after exploring 延暦寺 Enryakuji Temple with  琵琶湖 Lake Biwa and 滋賀県 Shiga Prefecture in the background. 

Japan be tryin’ real hard to knock a sistah down, but I’m holding strong and always moving forward. Now, hand in hand with the one I love.

じゃあまた (See you!)

- レイチェル (Rachel)

[wellhellofuture]

Ask Away (Steve/Peggy, 1/36 Shorts)

So I’m a little late to the Steggy Week 2018 celebrations but this has been rattling around my head for a while. Based on the 36 Questions to Fall in Love, which you can read about here: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html

Basically I wrote a short for each question with Steve & Pegs. Some are very loosely based (like this one). Enjoy! (Hopefully will be on AO3 soon)

-

Question 1: Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest? (I took this more as “Where in the world would you want to be right now?”)

Steve Rogers was euphoric.

Actually, he was completely and utterly exhausted, but his running theory involved his body’s exhaustion being so thorough that he could no longer catalogue each ache and pain. Thus he had passed on to sheer, numbing contentment. In all fairness, he had as many reasons to appreciate his good fortune as well as his fatigue. He had all but given up on ever making it to Camp Lehigh, not after five consecutive enlistment rejections. Yet here he was, training to be a super soldier, no less!

Well, maybe he wasn’t at super soldier level quite yet. Steve winced as he settled himself on the unyielding metal bench of the mess hall tables. His rear end ached with every shift of his weight, his head pounded from lack of water throughout the hot summer day, and he was pretty sure he could taste blood. Even the simple act of lifting his fork to his mouth sent an uncomfortable twinge through his bicep. He wasn’t delusional; he knew there was next to no chance of the SSR selecting him as the Project Rebirth candidate. He’d seen his health record shoved into his face far too many times: he was not super solider material. Even on this, their first day, Private Hodges had stood out as the prime physical specimen. The only thing stopping the SSR from shooting Hodges up with the serum right this instant was their worry that the world wouldn’t be big enough to contain his super-soldier ego.

Nevertheless, Steve’s presence in the mess hall, and at the camp in general, gave him hope that he might be allowed to serve one day if he could just survive the training. He’d never be the leader galvanizing troops at the frontlines, but maybe he could be part of the charge into battle. After all, he’d finished his first mile run of his life today. Nevermind the fact that all the other recruits had kept running for nine more miles; Steve’s vision had gone black at lack of oxygen a tenth of the way into the run and he’d collapsed on the side of the road for the medic to find. But he’d given it his all, darn it. His lungs simply weren’t on the same level as his enthusiasm. (To Steve’s utter embarrassment, Agent Carter and General Phillips, along with the other recruits, had managed to lap back around the path before the medic could get him up off the ground. He could take the teasing from the guys, he’d had that all his life, but the concern and disappointment in his superiors’ eyes was almost more than he could bear.)

Around him, the walls of the mess hall reflected back general din of military men at mealtimes. The most creative curses he’d ever heard colored most sentences. Spoons and forks added a background clattering as recruits scraped every morsel of Slop #4 off of their cheap tin trays. Laughter and shouts of mirth added punches of color to the rowdy atmosphere. The general mood was upbeat, though to Steve it seemed that a sense of desperation colored the unrealistically chipper conversations. These men had known what they were signing on to, after all. In all likelihood, many would soon ship out to the front and not all would return. Steve supposed it was only natural to feel a sense of bravado, a protection from the stark vulnerability of war. He’d just never been one to hide his feelings behind crude humor or hyperbolic tales. He guessed that was probably because he wasn’t all that funny.

To Steve’s left, a larger guy with glasses—he’d been next to Steve in marshal. Russell? Romero?—made a lewd joke about the two women he’d been with the night before he’d enlisted as his captive audience howled with laughter. To Steve’s right, Hodges and his admirers were engaged in a rousing game of Have You Ever.

“Yeah, but hav’ya eva’ taken one gal out f’lunch and anotha’one out f’dinna?” This came from a big, beefy guy by the name of Miller, clearly proud of his accomplishment. His neighbor, a tall, wiry string bean of a guy from Georgia, looked him up and down before saying, “Didja eat ‘em both for dessert after, Mills?” He clapped Miller on the gut as the entire end of the table dissolved into snorts. Miller, on his part, looked offended.

“‘Course not, I boughta slice of cream pie!” he protested, which did not help the giggling all that much. Steve shared Miller’s confusion but supposed it wasn’t the worst thing in the world if he didn’t get the joke.

Steve turned his attention back to his tray and tried to muster up the enthusiasm to eat what passed as a meal in the army. Due to his health, he’d never been very active, and consequently rarely had much of an appetite. Despite his excruciating day of physical training, the mound on his tray looked about as appetizing as the mucus he’d coughed up when he had that particularly bad case of pneumonia back in January, but if he didn’t eat he’d certainly pass out again tomorrow. He huffed a sigh of resignation, grimacing at the stiffness as his chest expanded, and set to the task at hand. He was two swallows into his meal when the seats across from him, empty thus far, were suddenly filled by the bodies of Agent Carter and General Phillips.

“Hello, boys,” Phillips barked. “Sorry to break up the party, but Carter and I are your dinner dates for the evening.” Evidently not sorry, and not particularly bothered by the opinions of the recruits, Phillips plunked himself down next to Hodges. Agent Carter settled in a bit more primly, directly across from Steve. He blushed a pale red for no reason other than the presence of a member of the fairer sex and ducked his head to avoid her gaze.

As Agent Carter settled in, a whispered comment came from the far end of the table followed by poorly-disguised guffaws. Phillips turned and raised a bushy eyebrow. 

“Got somethin’ to say down there?” he ground out. “I’m sure Agent Carter and I would love to hear your words of wisdom.” Miller and company, from whom the comment and laugher had originated, at least had the decency to look guilty.

The conversation, stalled by the arrival of the higher-ups, slowly regained momentum, this time a bit more suitable for public ears. Soon, the whole table joined in.

“I’m plannin’ on goin’ out west after the war, fellas. I hear California’s real nice. And all the dames out there wear nothin’ but swimsuits all the damn day. Some of ‘em even wear those flashy two pieces,” Hodges said with a sleazy smirk. It might’ve just been Steve’s imagination, but he thought he saw the slightest tick of a muscle in Agent Carter’s jaw as she delicately scooped a bite of her dinner onto her fork.

“Y’know where I’d go if I could go anywhere? Florida. Get on a boat, grab some lady friends, couple beers. Spend a whole month just fishin’,” Russell said with a slight smile. “They got real good fishin’ companies down there. Could probably make myself a decent livin’, and have some pretty damn good eatin’ too,” he mused, his eyes misty with thoughts of a future far from walls to scale and barbed wire to crawl under. Then his neighbor elbowed the arm that propped up his chin and the moment was lost, traded for the reality of wartime.

From then, the question went around the table clockwise, each man sharing where he wished he could be right then. A short, stocky fellow from Texas wanted to go to Colorado to go skiing; Bulgarelli, from Jersey, wanted to get fondue in Switzerland; MacGregor wanted to see the belly dancers in Latin America. One by one, the recruits offered a tiny sliver of the dream that kept them focused, motivated them through the endless tortures of training. Some spoke briefly; others waxed poetic on the specific dinner or event they wished to experience after it was all over. By the time the question rolled around to the man on Agent Carter’s right, they’d been talking for the better part of half an hour. The mess hall was nearly empty and the clock on the wall revealed that it was well past time to report to their barracks. Steve got the distinct impression that Agent Carter and Phillips were taking everyone’s answer quite seriously, and it dawned on him that eating with them at dinner yet another way of screening the Project Rebirth candidates.

Kowalski wrapped up his tale of diving off the coast of the Bermudas and turned to Agent Carter. “Well, Agent, y’got someplace you’d rather be?” he asked boldly. Agent Carter raised a perfect eyebrow and leveled him with a cool stare. 

“Why yes, in fact I do. You boys are not the only ones allowed to think of a time after this war. I think I would quite like to head straight to New York. There’s a club all my American friends can’t stop talking about, some bird name or something. I think I’d spend my first free evening there,” she finished. “General, I do believe it’s your turn.”

Agent Carter turned away from Kowalski to fiddle with her wristwatch. Her gaze caught Steve’s and he managed to hold it for 3 whole seconds before he felt warmth creeping up his neck. He hurriedly glanced down at his long-congealed leftovers, but couldn’t get the image of prim, proper, stunning Agent Carter walking into a club like she owned the place. Perhaps in a dress to match her lipstick, always that perfect crisp crimson, even after hours of surveying recruits in the sun. He completely missed General Phillips’s quiet, gruff answer of “Home to my wife” as well as several descriptions of a beach with women and no one else in sight. Steve couldn’t miss the continued tightening of Agent Carter’s jawline with each continued answer along that vein. It was finally Miller who broke her facade, not that Steve was surprised.

“I’d go t’France right this moment if I could. Them dames out there don’t wear tops at th’beach, fellas, whatcha think ‘bout that? Spread out, wine ‘em and dine ‘em,” Miller said, leaning back with his hands clasped behind his head. His face clearly betrayed what exactly he planned to do after the wine ‘em and dine ‘em part of his fantasy.

Agent Carter let out a huff, clearly exasperated. “You are aware of the war happening in France right now, aren’t you, Private Miller? Or are you just here for the ambiance and fine cuisine?” she said, her tone dripping with sarcasm. Miller, stuck on the tri-syllabic ‘ambiance’, opened his mouth, thought better of it, and shut it again. Steve grinned into his plate.

As the question continued to circle the table, Steve stole glances at Agent Carter out of the corner of his eye. A spot of color had appeared on the tops of her cheeks, likely a result of her little outburst. She was, quite literally, the most gorgeous woman Steve had ever seen in his life. She was --

“Rogers? Private Rogers!” It took General Phillips snapping in his face for Steve to break from his reverie. He belatedly realized the whole table was staring at him, waiting for his answer. Hodges was in the middle of an eye roll so intense Steve wondered idly if his eyes might not come back from that far into his skull.

“Oh, I, uh,” he began. “Er…”

He glanced around, mind helpfully blank of the list of places he and Bucky had made when Bucky had gotten his first job and they’d dreamed of traveling the world together with those thirty cents per hour he'd made. As Steve scanned the mess hall, desperately hoping for something to pop into his head, he caught a glimpse of the flag whipping around the flagpole through the window. Lit up by a lone bulb in the dusk, the white stars and stripes seemed to glow against the royal blue and scarlet background. Memories of each of his five enlistment rejections flipped through his head, accompanied by feelings of unimportance and uselessness. He’d pushed for so long to serve under that flag, refusing to give up while there were still people out there suffering. A whisper of a smile dancing on his lips, Steve had his answer.

“I think…I would stay right here. Y’know, get used to the whole slop stuff. Maybe if I eat enough of it I’ll sink right to the bottom of the mud and swim right under the barbs by next week,” he joked. There was a moment of silence, then the whole table erupted in hoots and laughter. Even General Phillips looked heavenward as if for patience.

But Agent Carter simply gave him a good long look, tilting her head ever so slightly to the left. He shivered under her gaze but held it, encouraged by the hunch that he’d impressed her. A second ticked by, then another, then ever so slowly, a smile drew up one corner of her mouth. With the briefest of nods, she turned to Phillips.

“Seeing as the only place these boys are headed in the near future is back on the training course, I’d say it’s high time for lights out. Shall we?” she said, slipping off the bench smoothly. “If no one besides Rogers reports to supper tomorrow we shall know where you all have gone. Though Miller, I’d advise against France. Wine and topless women aren’t worth having your brain blown off. Not that you seem to have much of one.”

[erectionsandtea]

100 Questions

Tagged by @mileven-and-contemplation (you gave me something to do today)

1. What is your nickname? Maddy is my nickname :P

2. How old are you? Too fucking old, okay

3. What is your birth month? August

4. What is your zodiac sign? Leo

5. What is your favorite color? Blue, any shade :)

6. What’s your lucky number? 13, lol

7. Do you have any pets? 5 mollys (1 adult and 4 babies), 6 tetras, and a black mystery snail (all freshwater fishies and creatures) :D

8. Where are you from? ‘Murica

9. How tall are you? Like 5′7″ or so ?

10. What shoe size are you? 9 1/2 ? Give or take

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? A box-full, maybe...10 pairs if we’re including slippers? Dude, I’m not sure of anything, half of my answers will end in question marks :P

12. Are you random? You tell me

13. Last person you texted? The bf :3

14. Are you psychic in any way?

15. Last TV show watched? Currently rewatching American Dad, last show not rewatched though..the new season of Archer

16. Favorite movie? 12 Angry Men (and then How to Train Your Dragon)

17. Favorite show from your childhood? Depends on what constitutes “childhood”, but I’m gonna say The Simpsons and Futurama (basically Matt Groening was my childhood)

18. Do you want children? Idk, maybe someday

19. Do you want a church wedding? Sure, if I get married, but the church has to be by a beach

20. What is your religion? I identify as neo-Pagan

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Once when 5 year-old me thought I broke my arm, and another time to the psych ward

22. Have you ever gotten in trouble with the law? Uhhh, I walked to the library once when I was like 10 without telling my parents, and a policeman picked me up, does that count?

23. How is life? A bitch, but sometimes a nice bitch, sooo basically normal

24. Baths or showers? Showers

25. What color socks are you wearing? I’m not wearing socks

26. Have you ever been famous? Briefly among Supernatural fans, when I wrote and performed this during the 2013 Mishapocalypse, I mean that’s the closest I’ve ever been (and probably ever will be)

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? I used to think so, but imagine the anxiety, fuck no

28. What type of music do you like? Literally a little bit of everything, at least one song in every genre (but mainly I’m stuck on ‘80s jams)

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Not yet, lol

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? Four

31. What position do you usually sleep in? On my side or on my stomach

32. How big is your house? One story

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? I’d rather get extra sleep in the morning

34. Have you ever left the country? No, but that time is coming, soon I’ll have been all over the world!

35. Have you ever tried archery? Yes! Every year at summer camp for like...6-8 years? I was pretty decent, too.

36. Do you like anyone? My boyfriend and Anna Kendrick

37. Favorite swear word? FUCK

38. When do you fall asleep? After lying in bed for like, an hour

39. Do you have any scars? Yes, and let’s leave it at that

40. Sexual orientation? If I like you, I like you

41. Are you a good liar? Fuck no

42. What languages would you like to learn? I’d like to get better at ASL, and then I’d like to learn German (but I’m absolute CRAP at languages)

43. Top 10 songs? The only two that matter are Hooked On a Feeling by Blue Swede and Footloose by Kenny Loggins

44. Do you like your country?

45. Do you have friends on the web? Yeah

46. What is your personality type? The type that people eventually get sick of and leave

47. Hogwarts house? ‘Puff pride, bitch

48. Can you curl your tongue? Noooope

49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to?

50. Left or right handed? Right

51. Are you scared of spiders? Definitely not fond of them

52. Favorite food? Cheese, and then potatoes (especially cheesy potatoes!)

53. Favorite foreign food? Idk man, I just like food, I’m discovering new amazing stuff all the time

54. Are you a clean or messy person? I want to be clean but I’m too lazy and messy

55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? Be the sassiest, most fashionable, and most adorable drunk gay boy in the club (so basically be Eddie Kaspbrak)

56. What color underwear? Uhhh...commando?

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 20 minutes if I actually care, 5 if I don’t

58. Do you have much of an ego? As a Leo, you’d think so, but the truth is, NOPE

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? Suck first, then bite

60. Do you talk to yourself? Who doesn’t do this at some point?

61. Do you sing to yourself? Yesss

62. Are you a good singer? I like to think so, I know I’m not terrible

63. Biggest fears? Being alone

64. Are you a gossip? Not really..?

65. Are you a grammar Nazi? I wouldn’t be if people knew how to spell and use proper punctuation, etc.

66. Do you have long or short hair? Short on one side, shorter on the other :P

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? No, I always forget at least one

68. Favorite school subject? Choir :P (until college, then my favorite class was psychology)

69. Extrovert or introvert? An extroverted introvert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Yes, I took classes a year-and-a-half ago and we went to Monterey bay!

71. What makes you nervous? The better question is what doesn’t make me nervous?

72. Are you scared of the dark? ...yes. Sometimes.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? I try to

74. Are you ticklish? Everywhere.

75. Have you ever started a rumor? Nope

76. Have you ever been our of your home country? Not yet, but soon

77. Have you ever drank underage? Yep, started trying things when I was 13

78. Have you ever done drugs? Yup

79. What do you fantasize about? My ships

80. How many piercings do you have? 6 lobe (3 in each ear), 2 helix (in my left ear), 1 tragus (in my right ear), and 1 nose piercing (next I’m planning to get a daith piercing, idk which side yet) (here is a chart for anyone who does not know the ear terminology)

81. Can you roll your R’s? I’ve done it 3 times in my life, all 3 were luck

82. How fast can you type? Super fucking fast, bro (and without looking at the keyboard)

83. How fast can you run? I haven’t’ run for like, 4 years, idk, but my best mile time was around 8 minutes in high school :P

84. What color is your hair? You tell me, I think it’s brown, but sometimes it looks different, like dirty blonde..?

85. What color are your eyes? Hazel :)

86. What are you allergic to? Probably dust or pollen, and my mom thinks I was allergic to our cat, but that was never looked into

87. Do you keep a journal? Tried, could never keep it up

88. Are you depressed about anything? EDIT: okay, mildly depressed, idk about what, I wish I did, but oh well, life fucking sucks that way

89. Do you like your age? ????

90. What makes you angry? Stupid drivers and people who are assholes to customer service workers

91. Do you like your own name? Uhh, it’s unique, so yeah I guess

92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? Yeah, I once put a tiny plastic decorative berry up there just to see if I could, and it got stuck but I was able to get it out just before I had to go onstage for a play I was in :P

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? One of each!

94. What talents do you have? If being mediocre at things still counts as talent, then I guess I can sing, play guitar, ukulele, and piano/keyboard, crochet, knit, rap, and write...but meh, I’m basically an expert amateur

95. Sun or moon?

96. How did you get your name? My parents wanted something unique, and they thought this name was elegant

97. Are you religious? Not at all

98. Have you ever been to a therapist? Yep, still seeing one now and planning on continuing in the future

99. Color of your bedspread? The one on my bed right now is red, but I also have a blue and an orange

100. Color of your room? White, but covered in posters and things

Idk who to tag, but if you want to do this, please do it, feel free! :D

Except for @killian-morelike-killingme and @textualselection, because I just feel like it xD

[panda-plumbobs]

sim my life tag

by @panda-plumbobs (wait, I made this tag? 😂)

rules: reimagine / recreate a few photos / memories that show something important about you or your life... in the sims! feel free to discuss what they show, and then tag some friends to join in the fun!

IT’S FINALLY HERE - the get-to-know-me-followers-gift-tag-thing I have been talking about for far too long! I’ve put way too much time into this but I’m really happy with the end result, and I hope this lets anyone new here get to know a little bit more about the simmer behind the plumbob that runs this crazy little blog 💕

As this is a followers gift (x2!!) I just wanted to say thank you to anyone and everyone who has ever followed or supported me - I love you all so much, as well as the simblr community! I’m going to be tagging all those who have been even more than that, whether they are friends, people I have chatted to, people who have inspired me, have been super active or just friendly in general, so if you are tagged at the end of this post, know that you are extra special to me and you are the best!! 😊

The first actual screenshot of this post shows five pictures that actually exist in my house - or as close as I could get them to look like the ones irl! You can consider the other screenies (5, 6 + 7) to be more based on memories and experiences, as well as just showcases of things about me! This is going to be a hefty and long post so I’ve put under the cut for you beautiful people. With all the admin stuff out of the way, let’s get right into it! ✨

1. ‘bright as a jewel, beautiful as a flower’ ~ Hi. You probably all know me as panda, p or the elusive A from the gallery (not A from PLL, I promise 😏), but of course, I’m not actually called panda, as that would be a kinda cool but unfortunate name. I have disclosed my name to a couple of people over message, but never publicly so...Hi. My name is Amber (it’s actually Amber Rose surname but Rose is a middle name, so I usually drop it when introducing myself, and thus explaining the quote so often used by mother to explain the name). Anyway, good to finally introduce myself to y’all! The picture above is obviously not when I was born, as I definitely didn’t come out looking that fabulous 17 years ago. No, this is an edit done by Grandma of my christening, 5 months after 05/09, my birthday. Of course, I don’t remember any of it, but it happened in my mum’s childhood-home-local-church, at the time almost an hour away from where we lived.

2. ‘splish, splash, splosh’ ~ By the time I turned two, we moved closer to my grandparent’s on my mum's side, who didn’t live too far off the coast. We lived more centrally in UK prior on the outskirts of a city, so moving there (or back, in my mum’s circumstances) to a rural and much smaller community was a big change. I personally can’t even remember my time in the city, as I was so young. I do remember our times on the beach after we moved. We’d go very often, and we’d play in the sea, make sandcastles, walk our old dog Sam... the pictures above were taken in one of the colder months during this time - and was taken and edited by my grandma once again.

3. ‘she smiles because she is my sister, she laughs because there is nothing i can do about it...’ ~ Not too long after the move, my one and only sibling, my sister came along. I think it’s fair to say that although I have always disliked her, found her incredibly annoying and referred to her as the spawn of satan multiple times, there is some love there. We do occasionally get on very well, but other times it’s like there is a war going on between us! However, things do always resolve themselves... but not for long 😂

4. ‘although i cannot see you, i feel your presence near. i will hold you close in memory, till I drop my very last tear.’ ~ In December 2013, my grandma passed away after battling cancer for many years. This was the first death in the family, and the first death of someone so close to me I had experienced. Although it sounds super big headed, as her first born grandchild I always her favourite, and even though she was very traditional, we were always very close. I’ve always been quite unemotional, so it didn’t really hit me she was gone until I was making shortbread biscuits in FT, and I broke down. Most people thought that it was because my biscuits went so badly... The photo here was taken on the same day that photo 3 was and before she got really ill, and I’m almost certain that the quote is from a poem I wrote in a card for her coffin.

5.  ‘divorce isn’t such a tragedy. a tragedy is staying in an unhappy marriage.’ ~ This photo is more of a what-if, as we went on many camping holidays when we were a family. In mid-2013, my mum and dad separated, and finally got officially divorced last year. The family was pretty much broken when my sister and I were born - my dad was always very restrictive with money, and we always only had the bare minimum we needed to survive, let alone live a good, happy life, even though we had plenty of money for that. My parents would constantly argue and fell out of love because this - so things had to change. I know that the splitting-up of parents affects most people in a big way, but this has never affected me that much. I feel as though I have never had a relationship with my dad, even though I lived with him for most of my life. Now, both of my parents have moved on and are happy in new relationships - I only see my dad a couple of times a month and have never met his new partner. But none of this has changed me, and to be honest, I think everyone in my family is a better person because of it.

6. ‘aspire and achieve’ ~ School has obviously been a massive part of my life. I followed the same line as most kids in England up to secondary school. I did a year at my local secondary before I moved over to another school, a bit further away with no one I knew attending but much smaller with higher ratings. Moving there was the best decision I ever made. I improved academically and socially, gaining loads of new friends and skills.Last year, I sat my GCSEs, and came out with 5 A*s, 3 As, and a B - I couldn’t have been happier. I’m now attending a large city college to do AS levels in English Language and Literature, Sociology, Geography and Film Studies this next summer, and even though I’ve only been going for 3 weeks - I’m loving every second of it!

7. ‘my face looks like the moon!’ ~ It’s been a long journey to finding myself, and I have changed so much as a person over my 17 years. I used to be really shy, never look at people when they spoke to me... but now I’m probably too confident, as I always let my opinion come first 😂 My personality type is INFP-J and star sign Virgo - both of which apply extremely strongly to me, and basically any description you can find of either is always highly relatable to me. I’ve always been unique and individual, not following the crowd, as well as a bit of a geek - a perfectionist, intelligent, organised and thriving on the Internet. However, I do have a girly side: one part of me that has stayed since I was young was my self-consciousness about my body, and I certainly have acne (which is subtly in the picture), not in such a bad way that I need to take medication, but it has bothered me for a very long time (show by the direct quote for this selection of screenies 😂).  I feel as though makeup is a fun and effective way of making myself look how I want, and although I’m not into as much as I was, I still love it! I also love to read, and have way too many books that I have bought and have got round to reading due to school texts, as well as clothes and fashion!

8. ‘always classy, never trashy and a little bit sassy’ ~ These final screenies are of me at my prom this summer just gone! My whole look was inspired by Clary from the Mortal Instruments, as well as Grecian style as I knew I was going on holiday to Crete only a few weeks after! Although it pissed it down all night, it was a great event and a huge celebration for not only completing and doing well in my exams but also how far I have come as a person in the last 4 years especially - my achievements, my friends and my personality as a whole. I’ll miss my old school and friends, but I’ll never get anywhere if I don’t move on - university, seeing the world, falling in love - I want to experience it all. College is the first step, and who knows what will happen from there. But I’ll never forget where I’ve come from and the people and events that have made me the person I am today 💫

I tag all of the people that have made these past six months so memorable on here: @inevitablesims, @tiredtoothache, @vividlore, @calisimgirl, @littlemissnellie and @sunlitsims! I love you guys so much and I hope you have fun doing this little thing I’ve created 🤗 Also if you fancy doing this tag and I haven’t tagged you here:

😂😂😂 Honestly please do - I’d love to see your take on this! Just say I tagged you as I would love to see it! 💞 I used my simself and family in this tag, but if you don’t feel comfortable using your simself or any other people you know irl (family and friends), then you could just use placeholders, blur their faces out or just do memories or photos that don’t include certain people - this tag can be as personal as you want, and as long as your followers get to know a little more about you, it really doesn’t matter 😄 Also with it being the lead up to Simblrween, I don’t mind of anyone I’ve tagged here puts it off until after then!

DISCLAIMER: I inspired this off Draw My Life videos on YouTube - I know people have done Sim My Life videos before, but they have often just followed a simself through a new life in the game - not really remaining totally close to the actual events that have happened to them in the past. I don’t think anyone has done this as a tag before (or anything similar) on Simblr, but if someone has done it before, I am deeply sorry that I overlooked this and I owe full credit of the idea to the person who came up with the original tag!

I hope you guys liked this, as well as my new small but personal updates to my theme! I love you all so much!! 💞

[ebenvt]

Introduction to Bacon & the Art of Living

The quest to understand how great bacon is made takes me around the world and through epic adventures. I tell the story by changing the setting from the 2000s to the late 1800s when much of the technology behind bacon curing was unraveled. I weave into the mix beautiful stories of Cape Town and use mostly my family as the other characters besides me and Oscar and Uncle Jeppe from Denmark, a good friend and someone to whom I owe much gratitude! A man who knows bacon! Most other characters have a real basis in history and I describe actual events and personal experiences set in a different historical context.

The cast I use to mould the story into is letters I wrote home during my travels.

Our Manuka Bay Wedding

June 1893

Dear Kids,

The trip to New Zealand from England, past Cape Town was the most exciting sea voyage I have ever undertaken.

On the ship, we met the most interesting lady who would play a major role in the lives of Eben and Minette, Ange Davidson. Like us, she was traveling from England to New Zealand. Ange loved the story of our engagement. A keen mountaineer, she identifies with our mountain and as a lover of nature, she was fascinated with the input from the Bushman and Korana. She turned out to be 100% the right person for our union! She is in touch with what really matters in life, mature, outgoing and a keen outdoors, mountain person! A true inspiration in her own right, she has summited Mt. Cook, the highest mountain in New Zealand that stands at a height of 3,724 meters. This peak is on Minette and my wish list which means we know exactly what skill it requires. We love the same things; emotionally and spiritually we connect; she was perfect! (4)

Minette left to get a refill on coffee when Ange told me that she is a celebrant and if we are interested, she can marry us. I loved the idea from the start! All this happened before we got to Cape Town. I was careful not to say anything to anyone, wanting to surprise Minette. Not even you guys knew! I was so scared someone would say something! I took Luani in my confidence. Well, I had to try and find the right size ring and a wedding dress – all without Minette finding out about it and who better to ask for help than her twin sister. Luni gave me one of her dresses which would fit Minette and a ring to use for the ceremony.

I thought I was being very clever, but to my surprise, when I saw Ange again after we boarded the steamer for our final leg of the journey from Cape Town to the small village of Queens Town, she had serious concerns. She urged me to tell Minette what I am planning before we land in New Zealand. “This is a big day for both of you and Minette will want her own input into what she is going to wear and how the ceremony will be conducted,” she pleaded with me. She had me write out our wows and what it is I wanted her to say. Every few days she asked me if I have spoken to Minette about the plans. (1)

She told me about the small village where she lives called Cheviot. Very close to it are two amazing beaches. One is Gore Bay and the other Manuka Bay. I initially suggested we have a ceremony at Gore Bay. I was insanely excited. (3)

I managed to control my excitement and not tell Minette. Suddenly the coast of New Zealand was in sight and as we sailed past the North Island, I realised that Ange is right. I have to tell Minette.

One afternoon I took a double shot of Whiskey for courage and started my very important discussion with Minette. Or was it a confession?! 🤔😁 I asked her what she would say if I told her that I planned the biggest surprise imaginable for her in New Zealand – a wedding on one of the most remote beaches on earth.  The first human footsteps walked on the beach at Manuka Bay very recently.

Minette and I are very much alike. She completely loved the idea! She is also a very level headed person and asked me if I looked into the legalities of getting married in New Zealand as foreigners. Of course, these were the last things I thought of!

We resolved to tackle these matters when we get to Christchurch. I immediately became very thankful for Ange’s advice when Minette told me that while I am figuring the legal stuff out, she will go dress shopping and then we can both go and look for rings. As much as she loved the Luani options, she wanted to make it more personal. I love it how she felt so close to her sister with her dress and ring with us. It was as if Luani was there with her all the time!

We finally docked at Christchurch. The City is situated in the agricultural plains of Canterbury were it is connected with the Port of Lyttelton by a railway, which required the construction of a long and very costly tunnel through the hills surrounding Lyttelton. It was constructed in 1850 as a bridle path for riding or leading horses (as is inferred in the name). (Encyclopedia of New Zealand) The early European settlers used it as the route from the port to new settlements on the northern side of the Port Hills.

Lyttelton Harbour is breathtaking! More beautiful than anything we have ever seen! Later, when we made it back to Christchurch we hiked almost completely around the bay which is situated in a volcano and the hike is along the crater rim. (2)

Christchurch, 1893

SCRAMBLE IN CHRISTCHURCH

Minette and I fell in love with Christchurch from the first time we rode into the city through the surrounding hills. Even while we were still on the steamer, we decided that we will be doing a lot of hiking. However, not much hiking was done in the week leading up to the big day. I was at a local bacon company, which I will write to you about in my next letter, while Minette did dress shopping. Her dress-lady of choice was herself as inspirational as any of the amazing people who guided us through this adventure.

Part of the ceremony required rings. No sooner did we start shopping for it when we realised that even a basic ring in New Zealand is the cost of a small Mediterranean Island! We opted for token rings with a promise to re-visit this back in Cape Town with Free Range Jewels! After fruitless attempts to even find basic rings, the universe destined us to meet up with the most inspirational lady, daughter to a truly remarkable entrepreneur. Both he and his daughter exemplify triumphing against all odds. We spent a long time swapping stories and the matter of rings was concluded. Not only rings but rings with deep meaning in how we got it and from whom.

Concluding the legal requirements was another story. We had to do it all in a certain way to make our wishes binding under both South African and New Zealand law. This proved to be much more difficult than I envisaged and it all came to a great end with an elderly Oscar, a veteran senior advocate, and one of the only notary’s public we could locate on the Friday afternoon to sign our marriage contract before we set out for Cheviot. Our wedding was on Saturday morning. Oscar, a grandfather figure, gave us sound advice, looked out for Minette’s interests in a final wording change in the contract and sent us on our way. The next morning we would get married!

THE TREEHOUSE LODGE

We did a last-minute booking in Cheviot at the Tree House Lodge of Sanna and Ellis. Unlike any other place, we have ever stayed, our home for the next few days was a small and very cozy room with a private bathroom, showers and a bed, suspended close to the ceiling with a ladder to climb up and down. Our own hobbits cove with a very friendly dog, a cat with a slight attitude and receiving a scrumptious breakfast every morning in a small basket, waiting for us outside our door with Gore Bay Kanuka Honey, homemade peanut butter, freshly baked bread and cereal from the amazing hosts on earth!

A friendship formed between us and Sanna and Ellis. We were scheduled to go on a hike after the wedding ceremony, but bad weather set in and they messaged us to say that they prepared the room for us again and we are welcome to spend the next two nights with them if we decide against the hike. That arrangement suited us brilliantly and Sally Handyside, our host for the hike graciously agreed to refund us our booking money! She will definitely see us on a future trip!

Over the next few days, we spend hours visiting, listening to Ellis and Sanna’s adventures and sharing ours. They are a famous couple but I don’t want to mention who they are. The thing that bonded us was not the National Geographic persona of Ellis, but their love for nature and the outdoor, their indomitable spirits and their belief that if one is going to do something, it should be done excellently. I told Ellis that he builds his house and creates his documentaries in exactly the way I believe food should be produced. Naturally and with care and excellence! This couple set the right tone for Minette and my life together and the perfect inspiration for our new venture!

THE BIG DAY

The rainy weather was setting in fast. Skies were dark and the wind picked up. Temperatures dropped. Around 9:00 on Saturday morning, the 28th, the bubbly Nike Newton showed up at the hobbits cove to do Minette’s hair. The brief I gave her telephonically on what to do was completely inadequate, but between Minette, Sanna, and Nike, they managed and Minette was looking beautiful! I got dressed in the pants I bought for our engagement and never got to wear on account of getting back from the mountain too late, I white shirt that we bought that week in Christchurch and off we went to Gore Bay Beach. Ange text me to say that the next beach is even more remote than Gore bay and we should meet at Manuka Bay beach.

We did not immediately find the beach, but an old man directed us further down and opened the gate. The storm was about to hit with full force. The skies were even darker. He jokingly asked if we are going diving and we shouted back in the wind, “We are getting married today!” “I will be your best man,” he replied. “I have a suite in the at home.”

The scene was one from a movie. In the cold, we took off our shoes and walked across the black pebbles to the small party of four awaiting us on the beach. Minette’s blue dress was beautiful against the dark background if the black beach, the skies, and the waves. I looked at her and thought how amazingly beautiful she is! There was not a single person on the beach beside us. It was perfect!

What follows is the actual content of the ceremony which I wrote on the steamer with major input from Ange over the previous few weeks; in between rushing to make the next transport. (5) Finally, the moment arrived. Ange had to raise her voice to be heard over the waves and the wind.

She started by welcoming us in the native tongue.

“E tu ake ana ahau ke te tautoko I nga mihi ki te Kaihanga. E mihi ana ki nga maunga, nga moana, nga roto, nga awa me nga wahi tapu o tenei rohe. Tenei te mihi ki a tatou katoa e hui tahi nei. Tena koutou, tena koutu, tena koutou katoa.”

She translated.

“I stand to support the greetings to our creator. I also greet/acknowledge the mountains, sea, lakes, rivers and sacred areas of this district. I greet all of us gathered here together. I greet you. I greet you all.”

Kia ora, and Haere mai. Welcome. Today, on this beach, you are to be married.

“Minette and Eben, your true church is the mountains and valleys, the rivers and the deepest forests. These are the cathedrals where you worship. Every stone and insect, the content of the sermons you hear; every sunrise you witness from a mountaintop, the opening prayer. Each glorious sunset, the closing hymn.”

“Here, in nature, you hear a subtler music and see wider visions and are inspired by a loftier spirit. The tempest and the calm day alike is the inspiration and voice of the living god who empowers and revives you. Inspires you to live more fully. Love more completely. Lust with even greater fire! Embracing each, to breathe this great air together.”

“Your union happened without any ceremony or by human will. The powers that unite you are the same powers that we see and hear and feel around us here this morning. It is therefore fitting that nature should witness your formal union today. Not in a city or a man-made shelter, but in the bleak and cold autumn coastline of New Zealand. As Browning put it: “Here, here’s their place; Where meteors shoot; Clouds form; Lightnings are loosened; Stars come and go.””

She gave each of us the opportunity to re-tell the story of how we met and fell in love. “Where is it that you first noticed him and her”, “When was it that you started to fall in love?” “What makes you soul mates?”

“Minette Bylsma, do you choose Eben van Tonder as your husband and promise to do everything in your power to create a loving and lasting marriage?”

“Eben van Tonder, do you choose Minette Bylsma, as your wife, and promise to do everything in your power to create a loving and lasting marriage?”

“As chosen life partners, do you both promise to support and enhance each other’s unique identity through love and nurture, and allow each other individual freedom within this marriage?”

“Who is carrying the wedding rings?”

“These wedding rings serve as a symbol of the vows you have just taken. As circles, they are the symbol of the sun, the earth and the universe, and of whole and perfect unity. They are an outward and visible sign of the inward and invisible love which binds your hearts together. In your marriage, may you enjoy the wholeness of life, spirit, and purpose!”

“As you place these rings on each other’s fingers, repeat these words”

“Eben, please repeat after me:

“I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and trust, and the promise that we have made today. “

“Minette, please repeat after me:

“I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and trust, and the promise that we have made today.”

“This morning, many mountains and valleys from around the earth bare testimony of your love. I now call them as my witness with the spirit of your parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents, your brothers, and sisters, the children you love, and your dearest friends. These are witnesses of your eternal union and hear me when I now declare you husband and wife.”

“In the presence of all these many witnesses, Eben and Minette, please seal your union with a kiss.”

“Here are two cloaks. Wrap each other in these as the outward manifestation of your love always folded around the other. Feel the love, the warmth, the security, and strength. Wear these as we sign the official marriage papers.”

They sang a beautiful traditional love song. Angel voices in harmony with the waves and the wind! In my arms, my beautiful bride!

“Minette and Eben, you have declared your love for each other and exchanged your vows. Now you shall say to the world, this – is my husband, this – is my wife.”

“May the love that has brought you together, continue to grow and enrich your lives. May it give you courage, wisdom, and peace in your future together.”

It was magical! Words fail! Life became complete at that moment!

Anna took photos. She, like every single person who was involved in making this an unforgettable day, has been amazing.  As if nature and life itself taught us that we are gifts to each. Minette and I to each other, but broader to people around us.

The ceremony all done, we settled in for the wedding feast. The setting was not a grand banquette hall, but the grass and flowers next to the beach. Our chairs were wooden stumps and the blankets spread out over the grass. Here we shared stories and got to know our amazing witnesses and new-found friends. As we walked back to our cars, it started raining. Everything was perfect!

The New Zealand adventure was a celebration of nature and the best of humanity. Every single person we met along the journey was exceptional. The lady in our favourite Cheviot coffee shop who herself got engaged on Table Mountain many years ago. The supermarket cashier who offered us her transport so that we could get to the next town when she told us there are no banks for us to draw money. She offered for us to stay with her and her young son until we are able to make other plans. Of course, this was not necessary. We had transport and a very cozy hobbits cove to stay, but the fact that she offered! What a way to get married and to continue our life together! Every person we met touched our lives!

When we were alone, after the wedding, when Ange, Anna, and our witnesses were gone, Minette gave me two poems. One is Nuptials by John Agard. The first two stanzas stand out.

“River, be their teacher, that together they may turn their future highs and lows into one hopeful flow

Two opposite shores feeding from a single source. Mountain, be their milestone, that hand in hand they rise above familiarity’s worn tracks into horizons of their own Two separate footpaths dreaming of a common peak.”

I re-read the last two lines again. “Two separate footpaths, dreaming of a common peak!” Such a perfect description of our separate lives, united by shared love!

The other is Us Two by AA Milne

“Wherever I am, there’s always Pooh, There’s always Pooh and Me. Whatever I do, he wants to do, “Where are you going today?” says Pooh: “Well, that’s very odd ‘cos I was too. Let’s go together,” says Pooh, says he. “Let’s go together,” says Pooh.

“What’s twice eleven?” I said to Pooh. (“Twice what?” said Pooh to Me.) “I think it ought to be twenty-two.” “Just what I think myself,” said Pooh. “It wasn’t an easy sum to do, But that’s what it is,” said Pooh, said he. “That’s what it is,” said Pooh.

“Let’s look for dragons,” I said to Pooh. “Yes, let’s,” said Pooh to Me. We crossed the river and found a few- “Yes, those are dragons all right,” said Pooh. “As soon as I saw their beaks I knew. That’s what they are,” said Pooh, said he. “That’s what they are,” said Pooh.

“Let’s frighten the dragons,” I said to Pooh. “That’s right,” said Pooh to Me. “I’m not afraid,” I said to Pooh, And I held his paw and I shouted “Shoo! Silly old dragons!”- and off they flew.

“I wasn’t afraid,” said Pooh, said he, “I’m never afraid with you.”

So wherever I am, there’s always Pooh, There’s always Pooh and Me. “What would I do?” I said to Pooh, “If it wasn’t for you,” and Pooh said: “True, It isn’t much fun for One, but Two, Can stick together, says Pooh, says he. “That’s how it is,” says Pooh.

FINALLY

I set out to find the secret of making the best bacon on earth and in the process, I not only started to discover the secret of bacon but also the magic of life.  I can not imagine life without Minette! We started separately and had many issues to work through. Our relationship started as kids playing in the streets of old Cape Town and swimming in the Cape waters after dark.  It grew through many days on Table Mountain and the mountains surrounding the Cape.  Despite our differences, what kept us together has always been stronger than what pushed us apart. All these years later, I can say, “So wherever I am, there’s always Pooh, There’s always Pooh and Me. She is my greatest adventure, my highest passion, my most intimate moments.  She is my art of living!”

Our wedding gave us a chance to express our sincere thanks to the special people who are part of our lives and whom we met on this remarkable trip; who made our wedding beyond description; and unforgettable! To the Creator who arranged things better than we could have planned and given us a send-off like no other. To our friends and family, especially the kids and Minette’s parents, her sister, and brother, who encouraged us, thank you for allowing us to do this far away and for all the love and messages. We love you guys and will treasure your words forever!

Minette blows me away! I’m madly in love with her! The fact that she was game for this unique wedding tells a story in itself! This was not for other people. This was for us! It was perfect!

Good Wishes from friends

Here are some of the well-wishes from friends around the world.  Adriaan and the Woody’s staff did this one! Thank you, guys! This means SO much! Hanro Rossouw, Charl Le Roux, Valery Cloete, Debbie. Meneer Adriaan Oberholzer – wow! Baie dankie!

My friends Oscar and Trudie Oscar En Trudie Klynveld and Trudie sent us this beautiful message.

Willem Klynveld sent us this beautiful message.

The message from our friends in Nepal, Ayush Rajbhandari and Silika Shakya Rajbhandari did not want to play, but we really appreciate the message! We were thinking of you guys!

Another friend of ours, Dawie Hyman sent us a mad message but I subsequently lost it.  I am sorry Mr. Dawie!  However, we will see you very soon in America.  After we discovered everything else that life is teaching us on these amazing shores of New Zealand, we are coming to visit you!

Elmar and Juanita sent us a beautiful voice message which I will also try and combine into one message and post here.

There are many friends who sent us messages through other media. Kokkie Kok, Oom Jan, ek sal Oom s’n soek en ook hier post. Baie dankie. Oom se woorde het soveel beteken!

Last, but not least, my old friend and colleague, Ehrhardt Meyer.

The message you guys sent us, Tristan and Lauren was very special.  We love you guys dearly.  You are our heartbeats and our soul!  Here is what you sent us:

Congratulations Eben and Minette on getting married yesterday!! I’m so happy for you two and it’s about bloody time!

You two have been through so much and it’s truly amazing to see how close you two have gotten over the years. I know you make each other super happy and I’m glad I could be around to see it ❤️ welcome officially to the family Minette ( even though you’ve been apart of it for so long 😏), really glad you’re in Lauren van Tonder and mines life❤️

I hope you two are having an amazing time in New Zealand, but hurry it up back so we can celebrate! Love both of you big time 🔥

Wedding Album

Landing in New Zealand was exciting.  Of course, we were brought here not only by the invitation of Stu but by the opportunity to see C & T Harris becoming a truly global company.  Again, more about this in my next mail.  For now, there is still a whole lot of “art of living” left before I return to the secrets of bacon!

The time we spend in Cape Town was again indescribable.  We miss you guys dearly and wish you were here with us.

Lots of love from Cheviot!

Dad and Minette

Further Reading

Our Amazing Wedding on Manuka Beach, Cheviot, New Zealand

(c) eben van tonder

“Bacon & the art of living” in bookform Stay in touch

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Notes

(1) Up till this point, Minette knew nothing about the plans. Ange strongly suggested that I tell Minette sooner rather than later. As the plane came in for landing I told Minette, “How about us getting married next weekend? In Cheviot? On the beach?” In a clear sign that we belong together, she was immediately insanely excited!

(2) Planning had to be quick! Luani, Minette’s sister liked the plan and gave me a dress and a ring to use. I picked the dress up the day before our flight. I did the application to the government online, two days before our flight out. In between the quick arrangements, I found time to call her parents and her brother and told them about the plan.

(3) In NZ, to select a marriage officer, one must also choose a location and all these have to be done well ahead of time. I was completely out of time! I was looking for a place outside Christchurch, somewhere remote. Christchurch is to city-ish for our liking. My first choice was Te Anau in the south, but I knew we would not have time to drive there. I did not like the look of the places south of the city. I wrongfully thought an old buddy of mine, Brendon and his family lives up in the Cheviot area and remember him telling me its the middle of nowhere. It turned out that I was wrong in thinking that he lives there, but right that it was the middle of nowhere and a beautiful and unspoiled location (in retrospect, I realise he was not even talking about Cheviot!) It is an amazingly wild area and the best thing about it is that it has a marriage officer, Ange!

(4)  She has done the Kepler hike which Minette and I did two years ago in two days!

(5) Also, between flights; during flights; in an airport lounge in Dubai

References

Encyclopedia of New Zealand, The Bridle Path,2010.

Photos

Christchurch, 1893. Lena Fuller, watercolor study of Christchurch signed and dated 1893

  Chapter 10.01: Our Manuka Bay Wedding! Introduction to Bacon & the Art of Living The quest to understand how great bacon is made takes me around the world and through epic adventures.

[onemanzerosquad]

New York Blackbeard Diary Pt. 3

Day 11.......Woke up.....Started my day getting breakfast then headed to my neurologist office to get my form from my job in regards to my restrictions. After, went to the library to print out documents in regards to a situation that led to someone purchasing something from a PayPal. Pretty much someone hacked into my PayPal and purchase a monthly subscription to watch a show smh. As I was heading to work, I thought about all of my problems and have decided to take care of all the problems. Feels like time is not on my side in my opinion and I can no longer deal with the bullshit no longer. As take care of the problems head on, I have no problem dealing with consequence even if my body limitations is at risk cause. I'm alone in this and that's no one fault cause everyone has their own problem to fix.

On on to the side story......2012.......

The new year started and I was in a long distance relationship. Unfortunately, It didnt last long. Obviously, communication was the cause of the problems. From there I was talking to girls got into a relationship but that didnt even last too. Then I saw her. Now I'm not gonna write her government name. So I'm gonna name her HopelessRomantic. Unlike every women I've been with physically, I actually found her online. I didn't expect her to give me a chance but she did. At first, we were back and forth breaking up and making up. Then mid year, she broke up with thru a inbox smh. She was right tho, I wasn't doing anything with my life and she felt I had no ambition. It's crazy because before she broke up with me, I wanted to let her know that I finally got a job lol. During that time til September, I was dating and talking to other women but at the same time trying to get back with HopelessRomantic. Then at one point, HopelessRomantic was going through a tough time. So I took an opportunity to help her out. I was making sure she was okay. Then one day there was a BWA (beach) reunion show and since I told HopelessRomatic about my backyard wrestling career, I invited her to the show. That day was interested as I got to see some of the guys even my first love and by the night, I brought her home and "Netflix and chill" happened lol. It was our first time doing something after 9 months of us knowing eachother. From that moment on we were back together but this time she trusted me and gave me another chance of love again. On to other things,in that year I started wrestling officially in BWA (Bronx). I had a chance to wrestle in RCW but I decided not to go. I knew I wasn't going to be comfortable there and plus the only people I would mostly trust would be the DIW wrestlers that I meant in 2011. Everyone else ehhhhh (the white boys weren't really there lol). BWA (Bronx) hands down was the best time of my backyard wrestling career. Holy Convictions Tag Team with Genocide, 4 aces, matches with Loco, Dixon, Dom The Don, my epic match against Gencocide that open everyone's eyes, and the match of the event of SuperShowDown (their Wrestlenania), against Joker. I had a epic time in the BWA (Bronx). Now back to HopelessRomantic. Our relationship was great. Our families liked us together, I got to see her often, I was working, the sex was great lol, and she even motivated me to actually go to college. The original plan was to go study Criminal Justice. Then December hit and after the hurricane, I came from chilling with a friend and HopelessRomantic send me a message on Facebook breaking up with me. There wasn't a particular reason. She wrote like an essay but it had nothing to do with me. I can only assume she wasn't interested anymore. So the year was heading to its end. So I decided to live it up with Black, Red, Green, and Blue Label with some 40s. Regardless of the break up, I still had good year.

Day 12.......Woke up and started my day with a cup of coffee. Went to my job to pick my check check my app to see how much since I started last week and today was pay week and apparently I got no pay listed on this week. So I can only assume my next check will make up for last week or something. Money is always with no value hard to get by but hey whatever. So went on my morning and TD Bank to fax the people apart of my dispute case and unfortunately the bank printing machine doesn't work doesn't work. So another Negative Nancy in the poison air of New York City. After work, I saw my Autismo crew (J God, Weirdo, and Porn Plug). Chopped it up a little bit and by the way F**K WWE 2K!!!!!

On on to the side story......2013......

2013 new year.....still working on and off. Surprisely, me and HopelessRomantic kept in contact regardless of the breakup. One day I brought her over just to chill. She got cozy which didn't bother cause she was single as was I. From what I remember, we were talking and it led to her being emotional and she was crying. So held her tight then boom......we had sex......The next day we were talking and I kinda express to her I wanted to get back together but she didn't want that. I actually cried but accepted and got over it. Probably like a month later, she got into a relationship with someone else which sucked even more. Other than that I signed up for a program that dealt with Digital Media and did well in the program. I was still working but not as much. My birthday but on that day I was sick (for about a week). After I healed, I started this new job that my guy Dirty Sandchez aka Eyevrows from Getaway hook me up with. It was an maintenance job. Did the job and all. July 4th hit and partying up drinking doing my thing. I woke up and got a call from HopelessRomantic letting me know that her Aunt passed. All I had was tears cause her aunt meant a lot The last time I talk to her was Mother's Day so the pain was more. I was mad and I played Dante's Inferno with anger. From morning til night, I beat the game. The one thing I notice alot that day was I had double vision that whole day. I would think that would be gone by the morning but it wasn't. After hanging out with my boy. I started to fall easily and constantly told I looked crossed eyed. By August my left leg felt like I or sprained it. August I finally hit the switch and started college. I was studying Mental Health/Domestic Violence Counseling. First semester went well. All As and 1 B. I even had my own little crew.

SIDE NOTE: One person in that crew ending up being my girlfriend (2016)

During the first semester I was still dealing with my health problems. Things got worse. My hands were so numb that I couldn't write. My double vision was there everyday and I had a hard time walking on my left leg. After going to the emergency room doing MRIs and Catscans and testing my strength with a group of neurologists and constantly hearing that I'm so young (I was 22), I saw a neurologist and he told me that I have Multiple Sclerosis.......

Day 13........Woke up, got ready, and speed walked to the bus stop to get to work. Unfortunately, I got a little late due to the bipolarness of the bus coming on schedule. When. I got to work, I couldn't punch in due to the app I punch in on couldn't connect to the server. After work, I went to see a friend that I haven't seen in quite some time and that was pretty much my day.

On on to the side story......2014.......

2014 came. I finally got my finally treatment after waiting for months for insurance reasons smh. I had to take it every week. I continued college by taking free classes inthe winter semester which was apart of Fall semester. As a result passed both classes with an A. From there my GPA was 3.6. With my education background with a learning disability, D equalivent grades, being in special ed classes, and receiving services due to my learning disability, for a guy with a incurable health condition that pretty much messes with your body depending on the central nervous system state, it was remarkable for something like that to happen. Spring semester hit and once again did my thing in classes, went on dates, and followed the routine of being on grind. Then the summer semester hit and I was offered to take a short summer class and I took it of course since it was free. That morning of first day of the class, I wanted to do the impossible and walked from my home to school (Albemarle and East 19 to Manhattan Beach). It took about 3 hours. Got to class on time and kind sat around or whatever. Some other people got inthe class and informed the professor that they were in the other classroom. For some odd reason I was more aware of a woman saying that then the others. Crazy cause that same woman ended up being my girlfriend by the end of September. We ain't saying government names. So her name for this post is Hermione (she likes Harry Potter). She had tattoos, smart, and she was honest for what I feel most of the time. Eventually the relationship didn't last and ended the same way.......a message. Her reasons made sense I guess (went too fast). Honestly I don't believe time should be a determining factor for a relationship to happen. If you feeling this person then give it a shot but that's just my opinion. Also, in 2014, I officially ended my backyard wrestling career against my friend, my brother, and my on screenplay rival Rodney Banks. It was the perfect ending to the legend that was called Heavy D.

Day 14.......Woke up. Gather some clothes and did some laundry. Sat outside for a little bit and headed back to the shelter and took a power nap. Woke up about 3 and watch One Piece Episode 901. I'm already current with the manga. So I'm basically watching what I already read. That was pretty much my Sunday. Plus I need all the rest for the upcoming days of this week. I gotta say, I'm slowly getting myself together to the point that people inthe shelter are noticing me more as hardworking individual. I'm always on the move and that's being notice and respected by people in the shelter.

On on to the tragic side story......2015

2015 started off okay. Winter semester was a success. I saw Hermione. But I didnt really give her attention after the break up but after we talked, we became friends and that was it nothing more. Spring semester came and I did my thing again and lived the college life but got a job. So now I'm get on my grind and officially had no time for much. Summer was here and my mother was working getting her passport to go back to Jamaica and see her family after years. One time I came from work and as usual expected my mother to be home since she doesn't like to be out late. She nevered came home which was extremely alarming. Call the police and I was informed that she was in the hospital in the city. Got to the hospital and use the phone to locate and she was in the 3rd floor ICU. I didn't know what ICU meant at that time but I knew it was something bad. Got to the ICU and saw my mother........Hospital covered with a bandage on her head as if someone bash a metal bat on her head. Come to find out, she had a seizure and fell on head in the street very hard. I was in tears. All I can remember was that the last time I saw her she told me that she was heading out. My mind was wtf like this ain't real. Called everyone I can call and every got the news that my mother was inthe hospital. She eventually got transfer to a rehab center in Far Rockaway Queens. Things seem to be okay. Then I come home from a hard day at home and I get phone call from a friend informing me that something happened and my younger brother didn't sound okay on the phone. Went to the hospital my mother was sent to. Her eyes was closed. Next couple of days saw her as the machine was helping her breath not responding or reacting inthe room. The doctor spoke to me and younger brother and pretty much said there a very little chance they can help. By October 12th. My younger brother called me and informed me that our mother died........

Day 15......Woke up.....Had to skip gym again. I had to get my mail and sent some emails. After, I went straight to work. After work, I happen to see a face I haven't seen in quite some time and we actually introduce our names after knowing each other for years. It's kind of cool knowing someone and finally just engaging in a conversation (just regularly). Then mailed my my money order to this One Shot Deal that I owe money to unfortunately. While on my way back to the shelter, I started thinking.....now knowing that just about everyone knows that I have Multiple Sclerosis......Hawk's Eye will be on me and my refusals from any assistance will make things a little more tough and edgier. So at this point, I have to be smart on everything I do. But I'm sure I'll get through this someway.

On on to 2016.......

2016 was here. After a hard 2015, I was able to keep the home, still work, made sure my health was good and survived a hard semester. I made the impossible possible. On the other hand, things were different. I started living somewhat a independent free life. I went to school, work, and party on the weekends. I was even going to the strip clubs and bars just living it up with my people. Eventually, I had this feeling like I needed to be what I was and I felt it was time to look for love again and I found it. No government names revealed. So her name was SoReal lol. I knew her since I started college (2013). We kept in contact and eventually we got together in July. It was love again. I haven't felt this type of love since my first relationship. She was smart, hardworking, and very determined to finish college. I was in love. When she felt she needed me, I was ready to help. We went on multiple dates. We talked all the time and we expressed that we loved each other. Other than love, I GRADUATED FROM KINGSBORO WITH AN ASSOCIATES!!!!! By September, I was city bound at City College. By the fall semester thing weren't good between me and SoReal. She distanced herself from me and with that I got less focus on school. Our relationship was so back and forth. When December hit, I got a letter from the landlord informing me that I must pay 3500 dollars in two weeks or I get evicted. So rent is not really being paid by my roommate, I'm barely getting thru college, and my relationship is a mess. As a result, I was still in relationship surprisingly, I pass my classes (barely), and I had to ask for assistance from this service called the One Shot Deal (where your whole rent is paid off but you got to pay back the money that was covered. 2017......would finally bring me to the limit.....

Not everything was meant to be......

Jikai........One Last Time. The Past From The Last View 2017 The Fall Of A Headliner

Mad King Recharging Arc

[rantysainty-blog]

so i filmed a sec everyday for most of summer &...

... i kind of wrote lame captions summing up my day so here are highlights bc most are boring:

(((- these are during 7 & 8.. it stops on 26/8 bc that’s today and i cant be committed enough to update this the next couple of days)))

(((-these are copy-pasted as i’ve written them in my half-high everyday-ness state)))

(((-these are exactly 24, with half in july and the other in august.. i’m dramatic like that)))

7/7/19: Going to training makes me feel depressed

8/7/19: I spent half of my day crying. Just girly period things.

9/7/19: Spent my day laughing a bit, complaining a lot, and checking out old albums

10/7/19: Attended a weird buffet, watched spider-man again, and bought some stuff for Dee’s fake birthday

18/7/19: I’m always crying. They’re always sitting together in the living room watching.

20/7/19: Witnessed a fight between parents, barely ate food at Shakespeare and Co, and decided to love Ricky Gervais even more

23/7/19: Started watching Gervais’ After Life, finally ate Foul, and felt half-okay for the first time in a while

24/7/19: Watched two other AL episodes, felt embarrassed a couple times, and finally got assigned with a fucking task to do

26/7/19: Looked at old letters with mom and had a nice uneventful day

27/7/19: Got my tiny tiny piece published in Il-Ittihad bc i’m a cool ass bish

29/7/19: Got mocked about my formal arabic and had various rants about how toxic one of my friendships is

31/7/19: Skipped training bc i was feelin tired and finally went to Warner Bros w/ Mo

2/8/19: Vomited twice, ate cake, and had a mini breakdown for having to read articles about cleaning leather bags and listening for half an hour about stupid fucking recipes just because I’m a girl

3/8/19: Felt a little shitty, played Monopoly, felt even shittier

7/8/19: Felt good today, it was good. My parents are normal people, they’re normal vulnerable people and that’s weird to understand

8/8/19: Had average work, wanted to leave early bc i was bored as hell, gave a coworker chocolate bc it was her birthday, & watched half of a DVD about Madonna with Mom

10/8/19: Spent my day puking & got my ears fucking pierced. Still can’t get over it

11/8/19: Had a Marie Kondo cleanup in my room, straightened my hair, & hung out with fam bc eid

14/8/19: Did some stuff. Sweat like a motherfucking pig. Took cute pictures. Felt pretty and walked by the beach.

15/8/19: Today was basically us prepping to get back home. I also find out and get super curious about Elizabeth Holmes

18/8/19: Had a nice long chat with dad where I felt like he didn’t actually hate me. Bought Ru’s gift and felt so fucking relieved. Got my newspaper training certificate.

20/8/19: These days are okay but not really. I feel anxious but it’s all real and legitimate. When will I stop feeling this way?

23/8/19: Put a face mask on, laughed a lot, and watched the last HP movie

26/8/19: Spent a really nice day shopping with bro, ate Pizza Hut salads, & laughed quite a bit

[awriteratcsssa]

Day 28 - 11:06

I can’t believe I’m writing this from my own room...

- I actually woke up early today (7:00) without an alarm. I think my body knew that it was a big day. I went through my morning routine, packed some more, then headed to breakfast. for once, almost the entire squad was assembled at 8:00. 

- bfast: strawberry crepes, hash browns, fruit

first time I cried today. one of my friends wrote me a handwritten note and two others wrote me poems. I read them at the bfast table and collapsed into tears. I love these people all so much.

- group photo in front of the calarts blue wall! plus a profile pic for me :) 

- last of packing for me. the room looked so bare :(

- down to sublevels for more group pictures! our squad is better than yours (Don’t Ya Wish U Were Us)

- 10:00 = last creative writing event, graduation ceremony. this entire thing made me so unbelievably emo. essentially, all of the teachers singled out each student with a few sentences before handing out certificates and medals. I started crying for other ppl and I basically didn’t stop crying throughout the ceremony. Adrianna said the nicest things about me but I can’t even remember most of it bc I was just crying through it. after everyone had been addressed, we had half an hour to hang out with our department. which just became more of a cry fest with everyone hugging everyone else. we were all one giant mess of tears. this entire group of 75 ppl has really become like a family, even though I don’t personally know everyone. only we will ever really know what these past 4 weeks have been like, and what a special bond that is.

- my group of friends decided to stop festering in tears and went back down to the sublevels to hang out amidst ourselves. only we just started crying more bc someone decided it was a good idea to give a speech that made us all ball. and then another of my friends followed with her own address. my eyes started to hurt bc I was crying so much.

- lunch: burger, fries, cookie

this is my last meal at csssa. holy shit.

- closing remarks by michael fields. they aren’t kidding when they say he is an outstanding public speaker. everything he said was so motivational and I am so proud to be a part of this csssa community. I have gained so much from this experience and I want to keep contributing back to my art. I held it together for the most part until he said that csssa 2017 was officially over and “don’t stop believing” started to play and beach balls rained down. then the floodgates opened and didn’t close for a solid fifteen minutes. more hugging ensued, and I don’t understand how i’m not out of tears yet. I got to meet one of my friend’s parents, which was kinda cool.

- back to dorm for final check, returning key. then we ran back out to take a final group picture, only not everyone showed up in time. we had some final words and hugs and then my roommate and I sprinted back to dorms to get our luggage and head to the curb to wait for the shuttle, since we were already late. only we really weren’t, considering the fact that the shuttle didn’t arrive for another 30 minutes and we were stuck waiting in the heat. I think that was probably the reason I started to feel sick right as the shuttles finally arrived. my vision felt blurred and brightened, like a filter. it was weird. also my head hurt and I felt slightly nauseous. luckily, I was able to get on the bus pretty quickly, and after a couple of minutes hunched over in my seat I felt better. the rest of the drive went pretty smoothly, save for the moment I thought I lost my earphones (I didn’t.) 

- baggage check-in and security at the airport went pretty quickly and I got to the gate with more than an hour to spare. I met another csssa student (animation) and we started talking. she offered me dried mangoes, so basically she’s the best. slowly but surely, other csssa students started to join us. I really hadn’t talked to some of them at all, but in that limited time we all bonded over interesting stories and shared experiences. the plane ended up being delayed a little over an hour. during that time, I treated myself to a matcha green tea latte, a caramel apple lollipop, and more dried mango than I should’ve had. 

- finally we boarded the plane, and I sat next to two of the csssa students I had been talking to. the flight was quick and easy, and I listened to music the whole way through. once the plane landed, we all walked to baggage claim together. I lowkey chased my suitcase around the conveyer belt before finally getting it off. after that, I waited for a while for my parents to arrive. 

- car ride home was nice. I do really love my family, and it was so good to see them again after a month. I regaled them with all sorts of stories, although it’s impossible to sum up an experiences such as csssa. even though i’m a creative writing student, there are no words.

- dinner = Chinese food!! yassss I've missed thissss

- I've just been chilling - I tried on the clothes that i’d bought online before csssa started, watched some youtube, scrolled through social media, talked to my brother. i’ll admit, being in the comfort of my own home is pretty nice.

that’s it. csssa 2017 is over. I still can’t really believe it. this month has no doubt been one of the best of my life. I've made friends faster and deeper that ever before. I've grown as a writer and a human being. I've learned and challenged and experienced. i’ll forever be grateful to this program. that’s a wrap from my “daily“ blog entries, but please do feel free to ask me any questions! i’d be happy to answer them, even if I will no longer be updating this tumblr. thanks to all those who have read and stuck with me. <3

[aliceellablog]

Struck by lightning!

Oh Hi there!!

Wait... lemme just show you my current view...

TA- DAAAA!! Isn’t it beautiful!

So I’m writing this at my Mum’s place down in Sussex, and it’s looking like Spring has finally sprung!! Yes I am still wearing a jumper... and I have the little heater on (shhhh! don’t tell my mum!!) but soon it’s gonna be ‘suns out bums out’ and I can’t bloomin’ wait!!

So I left off last week saying how I was about to go and see Phil Parker - the creator of the ‘Lightning Process’.... well...I did... and it went pretty damn well!

On my way there I walked past a few shops I really wanted to pop into (Topshop, Zara, you know the drill) and I was sad about the fact I couldn’t go and have a lil’ looksie as I didn’t feel well enough and knew I had a train journey afterwards, and that I’d tire myself out, bla bla bla....but...

I saw Phil for an hour and we went over how to do the ‘process’ and I asked him all the questions I had as to why maybe it hadn’t been working for me for a while. I think a lot of it has to do with congruence and belief in what you are doing, and most importantly, DOING IT! (not IT... that would be weird) 

The Lightning Process is basically Neurolinguistic programming, and it’s been used by a lot of M.E / C.F.S. patients with a really high success rate. It’s all to do with your thought processes and pathways you have made, and releasing the wrong chemicals etc (kinda tricky to explain) the aim of the game being to change your pathways. 

Turns out my pathway was headed towards a giant ditch and I needed to turn myself the fuck around! So that’s what I have been working on all week!

Have I been doing it every day? YES

Has it been working? YES

Do I still have moments when I burst into tears and think it’s not working and life is over? YES

Do I think those moments will happen less and less? YES......(please god yes!!)

When I left the appointment I walked back past the shops I had longed to go into, and do you know what I thought? Fuck it. I’m going in!! I bought myself a little ring which I’ve worn every say since to remind me that there is hope and that I can do things I might sometimes think that I can’t.

I looked around the three shops and kept processing all the time! Then I did the train journey home with a soya hot chocolate. Nailed it :D

The next day I was determined to do something I wouldn’t usually do, or that I would have thought I’d not be well enough to do (within reason) so I headed to the beach and genuinely had a wonderful day :)

The sun was shining, I won a ‘My Little Pony’ at the arcade and although I fell asleep in the car on the way home, I’d had a good walk and was feeling super positive!

Oh and I’m also now officially the best photographer there has ever been.... ahem.....

The next day was a ‘rest day’ but that’s ok :) I’ve got to remember that I’m not instantly going to be fit and healthy. No matter what’s wrong with me and if this LP (Lightning Process) is the right thing for me or not, I haven’t been ‘active’ in the real sense of the word for a long time... I mean... I haven’t exercised in years and years so I’ve gotta build up slowly :)

Thursday was pretty damn awesome actually! I had confirmation that this album deal I’d been offered is going to go ahead! I’ll be working with Jake and Andy at ‘Silence and Air’ on a 10 track album for movie trailers. They are the guys I did the Mac Donald’s advert etc. with so they are well connected and really good guys!

They have already started production on a few songs I’ve written already, and so my job is to write a bunch more songs in that style. 

I ended up writing a song called ‘Broken’ which is an empowering ballad. It includes the lines, 

‘Let me, fight for my honour,

Watch me, watch me get stronger,

I need, I need to go harder,

I’ll bleed, bleed through my armour’ 

With the hook line      ‘I’m not broken’

I wrote and recorded the song at home and can’t wait for Jake and Andy to add some epic production to it!!! Eeeeek :)

So, as I told ya, I’m writing this blog at my Mum’s- I’ve been here for the last three days having some proper quality mother daughter time....well it was Mother’s Day after all!!

We had a lovely day on the Saturday, and caught up on everything, although I say caught up.... I talk to her on the phone every day!! She is genuinely my best friend... is that sad?? loool... don’t worry... I have like actual friends too!!...well.. a few ;) ;)

So yes, catch ups and a nice chilled evening, and then last night I cooked her a roast!! Prepare to have your taste buds moistened.... eugh... what a word!!!

While I was cooking I was feeling bloody knackered, not gonna lie! I really wanted to cook for my mum (for once!!) and as I was chopping the veg I was having to process every few minutes..... and it wasn’t really ‘working’. 

I finished cooking and we ate the meal which was actually aiiite!!! And then had a nice eve with a bit of 8 out of 10 cats pon d tele! It was lovely but I could feel a break down approaching!! Argh!!! 

I kept processing but then got into a bit of a MEH stage. I gave up... OOOOPS!!!

I’ve been reading about the process as much as I can and apparently one of the most common things people do is they have a bad hour, day, or few days and they do exactly what I did... which is to think ‘This isn’t working, I’m so ill, I can’t do this, my life is over’.... the usual ;) - But by doing that they dismiss all the great things they’ve done!! Even though I was knackered, I should have still been thinking ‘I cooked a roast dinner for my mum! I travelled down to Sussex! I had an awesome day at the beach! I wrote and recorded a song that I am super proud of for a job!’ but all I was thinking was the rubbish stuff.

So I went to bed, had a cry, and eventually fell asleep. 

That brings me to today! I woke up feeling ok-ish and more determined again to get back on the lightning process horse!  

POW!! There’s an image for ya!!! 

I’m still struggling a bit today but this little (massive) one has cheered me up! - Another reason I love coming home :)

Have I mentioned that I’m a crazy cat lady? Well.... yea.... cats = <3 :)

Ollie (he’s the one in the picture) is a great big fat affectionate fur ball and I love him to pieces! He plays fetch with my hair ties (and nothing else, what’s that about?) and cuddles me to sleep whenever I stay! And Casper was the cat of all cats! 

Isn’t he booooootiful :) I got Cas when I was 10 and he was pretty much on my bed every day throughout my really bad M.E. days, well, years. He really made a huge difference to the long lonely days stuck in bed- I remember him laying next to me purring while I took my GCSE’s and he’d always be there when the DR’s came round - I think he was sort of protecting me. Man I miss him so freakin’ much! I ended up getting his actual paw print tattoo’d on my ankle when I knew he was really unwell- now I have him with me everywhere I go :) CUUUTE ;)

Well I think that’s me for another week! I am going to keep processing and hopefully when I write again in another week I will be even stronger, better and I will have had a positive week! Time will tell!!

Please get in touch if you’ve stumbled across this post, I’m on all the social media stuff far too much so gimme a shout :) 

Love and strength xxx 

[topicprinter]

Hey - Pat from StarterStory.com here with another interview.Today's interview is with Cory Stout of Woodies, a brand that sells wood sunglasses.Cory is a very active redditor - /u/sigmaschmooz - and he'll be in the comments to answer your questionsSome stats:Product: Wood sunglasses.Revenue/mo: $250,000Started: August 2012Location: Venice, CAFounders: 1Employees: 1Hello! Who are you and what business did you start?I’m Cory Stout, Captain of Woodies. I started a wood sunglasses brand when I was 28 years old.Our main product is walnut wood sunglasses that I sell for $25 on Amazon and Woodies.com I hired one employee (my dear mother) and she’s won Employee of the Year for 3 years in a row ;)In 2018, I topped 3.5 million in revenue and somehow ended the year with less money than when I started! I bought a Bentley to celebrate…What's your backstory and how did you come up with the idea?I studied Economics at the University of Florida but the real education was scalping football tickets outside of the stadium. I really learned my lessons on those streets...For example, there were a lot of characters I learned to deal with. The ticket street hustlers are really really sharp dudes. They would always ask to see my tickets, and make me offers on them.They would always lie about what they were holding, or what they were selling for. I had people steal my tickets, I had people try to muscle me off popular corners. The best thing about this experience was all the times I was told no.I would stand there for hours shouting ‘who needs tickets??’ and people would narrow their eyes at me and keep on walking. I learned that eventually, you’ll almost always find your customer. On the days when demand was high, I would return to my dorm room with 5 thousand in cash when I started the day with 500.I would buy student tickets all week, buy the upgrade sticker so anybody could use them, and sell them for mega profit on gameday. I made tons of money, I lost tons of money too (when it rained unexpectedly), I made friends and that’s what led to my next step.One of those tickets friends I made turned out to be my best friend. He went to China to study International Business and I went out to visit him a year later. I spent 6 weeks there and I go to see first hand how the world’s products are made.Some photos from my trip to China:Watch bandsI came up with the idea for an interchangeable watch brand, TIKKR, and I used my ticket money to get the ball rolling.To validate this idea, Mike flew from China with a bag full of watches. I was living in Austin at the time and we went to a party brunch to try to sell some watches. I gave one watch to each of the bartenders for free, then we waited.It wasn’t 15 minutes until we had a line of people offering to buy watches from us. We didn’t take their cash, but we drank free all afternoon long and had a hell of a time.I ordered 1,500 watches for $3 each and I set the price at $65. I barely sold any at $65, but I convinced Groupon to pick them up and offer a deal.A $65 watch for $32. I sold a couple hundred, I ordered more, I sold a couple hundred I ordered more. Then I sold a couple thousand in one day! Too bad the supplier was super late with the shipment and I had thousands of upset customers at Christmas time. TIKKR ended up folding leaving me back at square one with only about $15,000 to show for it all.Then I was back to China and this time I came back with the idea for wood sunglasses. Wood sunglasses were just coming on to the scene, We always had the first look at products coming out of China because we were always watching the markets in Guangzhou.We would see a cool looking belt show up at the markets, then a month later we’d see somebody on Kickstarter making 200k. Wood sunglasses seemed awesome so I tried to jump on them early. The same Groupon rep still wanted to work with me, and I was able to sell 8,000 glasses in a week with a launch on Groupon. On a side note, that Groupon rep worked out a deal for himself that he got to invest in Woodies before the deal ran. I took the deal (what choice did I have) and I was able to buy him out a couple years later)By the way, I’ve written a couple posts on reddit about how I got started if you want to check them out...Buying and Selling in China: The New American Dream (2015)Every tool I use for my business (2017) A lot of these have changedI also did the Shopify Masters PodcastTake us through the process of designing, prototyping, and manufacturing your first product.I just went to China and found three suppliers on Alibaba. I toured each factory and chose the one I felt the best about.Price wasn’t the most important consideration. It really came down to a comfort level with the supplier. The rep that I would work with closely spoke great English, they presented themselves well, they showed me their equipment and let me tour the factory while they were in production.PRO TIP: If you visit a Chinese factory, ask politely to the use the bathroom. They will have to oblige, and if you find a really messy, disgusting bathroom, then it’s definitely a red flag.Granted, there are a lot of disgusting bathrooms all over China. But these factories have millions of dollars worth of machinery, if they can’t put together a decent bathroom for their workers, then they are probably corner-cutters.They had a whole wall of every sunglasses shape you could imagine, it didn’t take a lot of designing on my end.Describe the process of launching the business.From there, I noticed that a lot of people were getting rich on Kickstarter, so I decided to launch a project to add new styles to Woodies. They were actually all the same style, but I wanted to add 7 new colors to the collection. I really just needed an excuse to launch a Kickstarter campaignI set my sights high and decided I wanted to hire Kendall Jenner for the video shoot. It started out as a joke really.My friend was kind of daring me to find out what her rate was. I just called her management, and next thing you know I’m negotiating with her agent.I got them down from 150k to 25k. 25k was just about all the money I had in the world, but I bet it on this idea. At this point, I’m basically the dude from Fyre Festival, walking around pretending like I had enough money to pull this off. I hired a really good photographer, videographer, hair, makeup, extra set hands, cool locations, classic cars, plane tickets, it was SO CRAZY, but somehow I pulled it off.I organized the whole photo/video shoot, I picked Kendall up from her house that morning wearing my captains hat, and we had a full day of driving classic cars, taking pictures on the Malibu beaches, and doing our best to capture the essence of Woodies and the new sunglasses.The Kickstarter project wasn’t a huge success, but it kept me going long enough to start selling on Amazon. I found a new supplier and started making wood sunglasses with plastic frames. They were cheaper to make and sell and the bonus was they didn’t break as often.Warranty issues were a huge headache with the full wood sunglasses (and still are).Wood sunglasses have less tensile strength than plastic. They are better for the environment overall, but a little less durable for the user. I started out with full wood sunglasses, but the return rate was nearly 20%, impossible to really turn a profit without a bunch of 1-star reviews. So I switched to mostly wood temple glasses with a plastic frame. This brought my costs down and my return percentage to about 5%. And now I could enable my customer service to send new sunglasses no questions asked, which resulted in lots of 5-star reviews about our customer service team.Well they took off on Amazon and I dedicated myself to becoming an Amazon expert. I listened to all the podcasts and read all the blog posts I could find. Shoutout EcomCrew I took the basic fundamentals that are out there and I added a couple of my own twists. That was about two years ago. Since then, I’ve just been really diligent about staying in stock major key and managing my PPC spending.Since launch, what has worked to attract and retain customers?I have basic knowledge of Facebook ads, email marketing, SEO, etc but Amazon just really really works for me, so I didn’t have the big incentive to build a huge list.Amazon brings me 100 brand new customers everyday for very little acquisition cost. If I tried that on my own, it would take a TON of work and it wouldn’t be nearly as effective as Amazon, so I took the easy road on this one.I wrote this post about Amazon strategy not too long ago, I followed all of my own advice.How are you doing today and what does the future look like?Business is doing great today, we almost reached 4 million in sales last year, even though my profit on that was a lot lower than you’d think.Less than 10% of that number actually counts as profit on my books. Before the profit police come commenting all over this thread, I was able to pay myself a decent amount that’s not included in that number, and I also invested in 8 classic cars this year as I get a new venture off the ground, instagram.com/captainsclassics.My ACOS on Amazon hovers around 30% with a monthly spend of about 50k. I have less than 5k email subscribers and I rarely email them, I think people are starting to get bothered by all the automated marketing out there, and that’s actually a big reason they choose to shop on Amazon, just to not subject their inbox to automated email cancer.Side note, I’m getting sued by Luxxottica for a BS trademark infringement. So the entire business is being threatened by them.Through starting the business, have you learned anything particularly helpful or advantageous?Believe in yourself and just keep going no matter what. Of all the friends who started a business at the same time I did, almost all of them are still in business and doing really well. If you just stay in business, you almost can’t help but grow.I read the 4-Hour Workweek many many years ago and it really set my thinking from day one. I just wanted to be really really good at one thing, and that’s what happened with my best selling product. I was able to ‘set’ the market.Once I did that, no one would be able to:Beat my priceOutnumber my reviewsOutspend me on PPC.The distance between me and 2nd place on Amazon got bigger and bigger.I wanted a simple business, I wanted it to be automated, I wanted to be able to run it from anywhere. It took a lot of discipline to turn down ‘good’ deals sometimes.But I decided simplicity was that important to me. It’s only really possible with an Amazon business with FBA. I remember the old days when I had to use a 3PL, 2/7 would not recommend.I don’t sell on Etsy, Ebay, or Wal-Mart (even though they wrote me an unsolicited PO). I don’t sell to retail stores. The one time I broke this rule was trying to expand to Europe on Amazon. I wouldn’t call it a disaster, but it took way more time/energy than it has paid off. I’m closing down those operations currently.I hired my mom as my customer service rep 3 years ago and the business absolutely flourished once she took over. 1. It let me focus on sales and growth 2. She’s so much better at being really really nice than me.What platform/tools do you use for your business?I’ve got a great reddit post which I wrote all about this.What have been the most influential books, podcasts, or other resources?I listen to the EcomCrew podcast pretty regularly.It’s a really straightforward informational podcast, they actually give really good info. They’re both Amazon sellers, so they tend to focus most of their discussion on Amazon.I’ve met Mike out in Hong Kong and he’s a really solid guy.Advice for other entrepreneurs who want to get started or are just starting out?Pick something that you’re going to enjoy selling/talking about nonstop.You are your biggest marketing tool especially early on. Be prepared to be the face of your company.Are you looking to hire for certain positions right now?I hired my mom for customer service and that’s about all I need.I probably want to sell Woodies in 2019, any buyers out there?Where can we go to learn more?Woodies.comInstagram.com/WoodiesIf you have any questions or comments, drop a comment below!Liked this text interview? Check out the full interview with photos, tools, books, and other data.Interested in sharing your own story? Send me a PM