#well this was a Rant
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i used to be so good at writing strong, thoroughly-researched, thoroughly-edited essays.
as a kid in hs, my teacher literally came up to me, holding my 40 page essay on the intersection of the European witch hunts and capitalism/exploitation/gender roles (it was supposed to be 7 pages...whoops) and went like "this is literally a master's-degree level thesis. what are you doing?? you could literally use this as your final dissertation in a master's program, what the fuck."
NOW??? NOW?? you'd think I'd be oh so skilled. but alas. i can barely piece together two ideas. adhd skill-regression is so so real. im SOBBING
#this is just me ranting sorry#im very tired and hungry#and i want to sleep but brain go brrrrr#well i used to be nice and smart and now im neither of those or however the song goes#pretty sure he was exaggerating cause looking back. it was good. but some of the wording was a lil wonky#adhd#actually adhd#executive dysfunction#actually neurodiverse#adhd paralysis#adult adhd#attention deficit hyperactivity disorder#adhd hacks#academia#neurodivergent#adhd skill regression#confessions of a burnt out gifted kid#<< i guess#former gifted kid#burnt out gifted kid#gifted kid burnout#realizing i sound rly pretentious here sorry -- formal speech patterns i picked up as an autistic child and never put down again haha
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girls when they remember that sally named percy after the only greek hero with a happy ending and beryl named jason after a hero who died alone and unhappy to appease a wrathful goddess.
#jason grace#percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo#heroes of olympus#pjo hoo toa#i haven't been here in so long#logging on just to rant about jason grace#ricky when i catch you ricky#wasted potential it makes me sick#in another universe hoo was written better#well i love my boy in every universe
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The final TF2 issue really got to me. Spoilers, but it’s the reveal that all of this suffering and murder and war over gravel and shitty land was for nothing but senseless, bottomless hatred. That the administrator can’t even remember where this revenge plot started as she flashes through different false memories of her parents’ deaths. There was never a tragic backstory or justification, only terrible people doing despicable things. And despite how crass and stupid and unserious TF2 is, the story subverts every expectation by showing the survivors and inheritors willingly breaking the cycle. Ms. Pauling lies to the administrator and chooses not to save her, and finally lets her die. (Hurts even more if you read into the subtext that Ms. Pauling is in love with the administrator.) She lets the final cache of Australium go and walks away from the burden and legacy of a century-old bloodfeud. Hale lets Gray’s daughter go and live her life freely. Spy is the first to arrive at Scout’s house and meet his big family, finally takes off his mask, and helps with the kids. Even Merasmus exhaustedly makes peace with himself and Soldier and chooses not to curse him or something. There’s nothing to finish, no promises to keep, and no one to avenge. The only thing to do is break the cycle and walk away.
It feels odd how happy and warm everything is, but it feels so right and earned. These bloodthirsty, awful, violent men were expendable cogs in a machine of endless violence, and they found a way out. It’s a genuinely great message about letting go the past that burdens you and finding the will and a way to hit the bricks, change, and be happy. Maybe they don’t technically deserve happiness, but they’ve got it nonetheless, and they’re not gonna let it go to waste. They’re still all crazy and violent, but on their own terms now and with people who love them! Smiles.
#tf2#rant#personal#the stuff with the administrator reminded me of the ending of breaking bad#except the admin isn’t as self aware as Walt lol#that there was never a sympathetic reason or justification to fall back on#all of this was done simply because they were sadistic people#I really appreciate the writers avoiding the expected trope of the administrator dying and#Ms Pauling taking the mantel and becoming the next administrator. both as a either a girlboss empowerment thing or a sad but realistic end#like nah they’re happy and doing well. we won’t torture these characters any more and doom them to continuing the cycle#they’ll be happy and you’ll be happy for them
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He's so normal, guys. I promise. He's sooooo normal. Normalest guy ever. (Lying)
#disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#just realized that I forgot the third T in Frittte#oh well#he's buying some shredded wheat#Kim's deep need to be perceived as Normal and Not Different.... UGH#he's weird!!! he's a weird guy!!! do not be convinced by his normal guy facade#i could go on a long rant about him and his relationship to the status quo but for now im just going to draw him buying bland cereal
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It's really cute that you're gonna defeat me with the power of friendship and all, but again, I am the Devil from the Bible
(continued)
#I want to animate that whole Devil rant as Bill I wont lie. It's so good. It fits so well#''Would you guys stop calling me cringe? please? Like this is between me and my friend Sixer...''#Gravity Falls#Sonic Fandub#Shadow fandub#Bill Cipher#Ford Pines#Stanford Pines#Grunkle Stan#real time fandub#Comic#GF fanart#fan art#fanart#Artists on tumblr#my art
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i think dan should get to be a little weird too. as a treat
#my art#re animator#herbert west#daniel cain#dan cain#danbert#no but srsly guys i get that hes the normal guy but you forget ... HES ALSO WEIRD !!! HES SO STRANGE !!!#if he was normal he would have called the cops on herbert ages ago#but guess what babey he ... well technically he did call the cops but he waited like 20 years to do it so .. !!#bro was an enabler dont forget that#sorry im like rlly crazy about dan...#which is unfortuante bc i feel kind of alone in that like YES herberts a baddie YES hes litterally me#but dan....... DAAAAAAAAAAAN (eagle screeching)#what the fuck am i saying!#edit hey guys its actually lucid dog that rant you see above you was written at likes 6am after an all nighter#we all know dan is weird i mainly meant i think he should get to be PORTRAYED as weird more#really im just weird about him (<3) and i need him to reflect that
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i saw someone spread hate to Keiko bc they were a Bashir/O'brien shipper, and i do NOT agree with that.
why would you ever say such things when this was always an option?
this is obviously what's happening in the show anyways
#i love her so much and i can rant about her forever and ever. please do not come to me with keiko hate bc i do NOT want to hear it#she wasn't even in the picture i saw this commented on. the person just targeted her for no reason#keiko o'brien#miles o'brien#julian bashir#elim garak#star trek fanart#star trek#fanart#art#deep space nine#ds9#edit: everyone who is saying i forgot kira is right and i am so sorry. she is absolutely a part of this family as well
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“This fic would be better if—” babe this isn’t your high school English class and my fic isn’t assigned reading. it’s something a stranger wrote on the internet without an explicit request for constructive criticism or suggestions for improvement. you are not grading my smut fic on a rubric (I hope).
if you cannot consume writing without needing to criticize it, that’s a you problem. stop leaving me these kinds of comments — and if you DO: for god’s sake, please make sure you’re actually objectively correct about the criticism you’re leaving.
#rant#mini rant#ao3#archive of our own#writing#fanfic#fic#fanfiction#like I have a college degree#I have been writing professionally for years#I’m not saying I won’t have typos#but high schoolers telling me WRONG criticism#is so frustrating#I love the enthusiasm guys but#it’s not well received#and not requested
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Sometimes a day makes you want a Starscream to bite and squeeze
#guess who got their final scores back ahaaa#class avg was 60 percent 😭#also I have blocked the transformers tag on TikTok that place is a hellhole#bit of a vent here but it’s so crazy#I was talking to a person I didn’t even follow a while back and we were making jokes like yeah the autobots ship megastar#on my fyp a couple days later and I see them reposting “shipping megastar is bad and gross’ like bruh what#I saw one of my followers commenting ‘yeah can’t believe it’s so popular’ I HAVE POSTED MEGASTAR BEFORE WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE#I POSTED MY STARSCREAM AND MEGATRON FIGURES RAILING EACH OTHER#I only started posting cause I was like eh if it’s getting banned might as well#these people were poisoning my fyp smh#I’m convinced it’s just a moral superiority thing like all of those people who thought abo was so cringe and then someone was like#‘I secretly like abo’ and everyone agreed that they also like abo and it’s not that weird anymore#Ngl though. it is kinda sad but also kinda funny#sorry for the rant cause I talked about it before and I don’t want to keep on talking about it but those two baffled me#transformers#transformers fanart#megastar#megatron#starscream#transformers g1#megascream#maccadam#its like watching one of those religious couples where one of them is gay and theyre like 'I am working through my gay to be straight'
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Rio is affectionately amused by Agatha's shenanigans
Agatha All Along 1x01 | 1x04
#tv: agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#ship: rio x agatha#ship: agatha x rio#ship: vidarkness#kathryn hahn#aubrey plaza#agnes o'connor#marveledit#mcuedit#marvelgifs#agathallalongedit#my edit#rio is amused by agatha's everything#she loves it when agatha's snarky and mean#or when agatha goes on a passionate rant#rio isn't even mad when agatha tries to turn the coven#against her#she knows agatha well enough to pull those stunts#and doesn't hold it against her#and rio is affectionately amused#with agatha sharing her knitting needle scar
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As someone with dissociative issues, I cannot shut up about how much I love Copia’s dissociation in RHRN.
Just that flat-out refusal to accept the horrible facts of life (in this case Sister dying). His mind trying to manifest the reality he wishes for, and the confusion as he slowly sees what’s actually happening again.
The way how confused he is when he’s suddenly changed into his black robes.
The hazy way he sees reality and his own imagination blending (Sister being tended to by a doctor while he tries to ignore it).
The. Fucking. Balloon. Sequence.
Copia wants away from his problems, so his mind flies him away until he literally crashes back into reality.
The balloon was great way to show it bc I know when my issues start, it does feel like I’m floating, like I’m in a different realm to the rest of the world.
I love it all and how it was done. Tobias Forge, you are a GENIUS.
#does this even make sense#probably not#but oh well I’m too happy about this not to rant lol#the band ghost#cardinal copia#papa emeritus iv#papa copia#the nameless ghouls#ghovie#rite here rite now#rite here right now spoilers#frater imperator#sister imperator#dissociation#derealisation#maldaptive daydreaming disorder#maladaptive daydreaming#tobias forge#rhrn#rhrn movie
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Ghost: Captain- John... what the FUCK!?
Gaz: Self-sacrifice? No no- We don't do that shit
Price: Wouldn't have made it out even if I tried. Good thing the bomb was a dud
Soap, with tears streaming down his face: A FUCKING MIRACLE THE FACT IT WAS
Gaz, now starting to cry: You could have DIED
Price: I didn't-
Ghost: ORPHANED AGAIN. DO YOU WANT THAT??
Price:
Price: Don’t dog pile me
Ghost: I'M CALLING NIK AND TELLING HIM EVERYTHING
Price: T-That's not necessary-
Ghost: AND GRAVES
Price: ABSOLUTELY NOT NECESSARY
#price: *almost dies*#price: well that happened#the boys: *incoherent crying/ranting*#call of duty#modern warfare#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#john price#incorrect quotes#nikpricegraves#pricegravesnik
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Ryoko Kui Does Not Believe in Epiphanies (or: why Marcille and Mithrun's endings are great actually)
I have seen a couple of people who are upset about the way that Mithrun and Marcille's stories were resolved so I'm writing this to clear some things up. Ryoko Kui does not believe in epiphanies. An epiphany is a sudden and usually brief realization, an "aha" moment. Epiphanies are emotionally powerful moments. Both Marcille and Mithrun have powerful moments of realization, epiphanies.
Whether or not you like these resolutions, there's something you need to understand, Ryoko Kui does not put that much stock into these moments. Immediately after Marcille has her realization, Tansu responds like this:
While this is mostly his own opinion, what he is pointing out is that epiphanies are brief, they are singular moments that do not define a life. Life is long, and epiphanies do not sustain you. Marcille might feel like this now, but what about tomorrow? what about nex year? ten years, a hundred years, five hundred years from now? How often have you felt a sudden understanding? a burst of inspiration, or perhaps a realization that everything is pointless? It generally passes quickly, and you make dinner, and go to bed.
Think about the best meal you have ever had, it was probably a special occasion, maybe it felt like something magical, in the moment you might have felt like your life was changed. Then, in the morning you were hungry, so you ate breakfast. You cooked, you did the dishes, you went on with your life. What "meaning" did that meal have if you were hungry again the next day? Mithrun has to rebuild everything, every day he has to come up with new desires to do the very basics. None of it comes naturally, he has to find a reason to eat beyond being hungry, a reason to want to do anything when he doesn't want anything. Ryoko Kui tells us outright, that there is no magical solution:
The same thing applies to Ryoko Kui's representation of racism in dungeon meshi. Around when the orcs appeared in the anime I saw people gripeing about the way racism is treated. They seemed to think that Laios's party having dinner with the orcs was presented as them "solving" racism. Once again people misunderstand, they did not solve racism in a single moment. A few people, understood each other a little better, came to an arrangement and then parted. This was merely a moment in their lives. The characters continue to do micro-agressions, hold stereotypes, and have implicit biases. In dungeon meshi, characters don't suddenly stop being racist in the course of an evening. Life is a process, learning about others is a process, it's about the accumulation of experiences through the meat and potatoes of life, the daily activities that we actually fill our lives with, not the sudden realizations. Once you make learning about and living with other people into part of your routine, once it is embodied, then it is part of your life.
This is the real conclusion: life is not lived in a state of epiphany. Life is about chores, cooking, eating, shitting, working, and sleeping, it's everyday. Life is about doing simple things and doing them well. An epiphany is a useful tool for telling the reader that everything is going to be alright, we love to read epiphanies and be swept up in them. They can also be a breaking of a pattern, an escape from a spiral.
This is the other take away, it's about the people you do those things with, the way they rub off on you, the way they help you be human. For Mithrun and Marcille their paths would be impossible without other people pushing them back on the path as they stray. Mithrun literally would starve to death except for the thought that kabru and others don't want him to. Eating is a communal activity, so is living, you can have an epiphany on your own; you can't live on your own.
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Oh I have so many thoughts on aroace Curly, I think it brings so much on the table when analyzing the game's story.
Amanormativity ties in with the reoccurring mentions of the nuclear family, from Wrong Organ making 1950s mock advert posters, to Swansea talking about how getting a wife and kids didn't bring him any fulfillment in life.
In the cake cutting nightmare sequence, where Jimmy talks with Dream Curly about the mediocre cake, Dream Curly begins to talk about how sometimes you can only get the subpar stuff in live. Sometimes he'll get promoted, buy a house, fall in love. But other times he'll just have some awful fucking cake with his friend.
I think there is that subtle implication that Jimmy does buy into Amanormativity, with him projecting his beliefs on Dream Curly that a platonic relationship is lesser then a romantic one. But we never see Curly suggesting that he wants such a thing in the pre-crash.
With Jimmy thinking that Curly has everything in life, except for the desire (although I think Jimmy would view it as Curly not having the skills for it) to get a romantic partner, he would heavily lean into getting the one thing that Curly couldn't get in life to one up him.
THATS EXACTLY WHAT IM THINKING!!! AMATONORMATIVITY BE DAMNED!!!!
Looking at Mouthwashing through an aroace lens is interesting
"Jimmy thinking that Curly has everything in life, except for the desire", well said, well said! And references to the nuclear family fit in very cleanly thematically for Mouthwashing.
Jimmy leaning into amatonormativity is a smart observation. Jim internalizes all the social norms and standards on what you have to do to have a normal and desirable life, who sees everything Curly has and what Jimmy wishes he had, and is offended that Curly isn't satisfied, that he has the "audacity" to be unhappy. Curly meanwhile only wishes for his life to be something he doesn't have to run from, because by all means, he has already reached a point where he should feel accomplished, but isn't. Curly doesn't want to be a freighter captain his whole life, he doesn't want to settle with his sustainable position, he just wants to be happy. Like Swansea who has reached the "ideal" outcome of his life, having a wife, kids and a good career, it will never feel as good as embracing all what society deems undesirable yet right for you.
Jimmy does imply to seeing himself as lesser as a friend, "fall in love" being a goal and a "cake with a friend" being something he "has to settle for", it's all in the subtleties with underlying themes of "what you're "supposed to want" by society's expectations" against "what feels right for you". Jimmy is frustrated that Curly is going to "leave the dirt behind him", when in actuality, letting the crew and him go is the last thing Curly wants. Curly wants to be with his friends, he deeply cares about his crew, and about his close friend.
Mouthwashing as a whole reads to me as platonic through and through. Swansea and Daisuke having such a meaningful familial bond, Curly and Anya being sweet, playful and caring without romance, Anya and Daisuke having something of a siblings dynamic are dear to me. Also it's really rare to get to see representations of "toxic friendship" in media. Its always toxic romance this, toxic yaoi that, toxic family there, however in reality, friendships aren't excluded from being as rotten and abusive as the others, yet they're often overlooked. Jim and Curly are especially unique in this way. It's very impressive how they managed to showcase Jimmy's mistreatment of Curly in such a platonic way (at least that how I read it). Jim too, like Curly, in general avoids hints at romance and attraction explicitly related to him during his gameplay, not with Curly, nor with Anya (dear god thanks for that at least). It's all spite, annoyance and parasitizing off of these two. (That man's dry and lowkey hates everyone and everything) No attraction attached, no desires except hoping it hurts.
Curly to me is very much aroace, or at least on the spectrum. Like, the trivia fact that one of Curly's fondest memories is that of his friends putting in effort to make a shitty awful cake, tells us all we need to know on how dear his friends are to him. Platonic relationships mean so much to Curly, even when it's Jimmy fucking Mouthwashing, the worst friend ever imaginable.
#apologies I'm gonna rant a bit too#amatonormativity runs rampant within this fandom as well it seems tho#looking at you jimcurlers who think#“there's no way Curly and Jimmy were ”JUST“ friends there has to be something ”MORE“ to their relationship”#“because obviously two guys can't be close and toxic and NOT be having say gex with each other”#on the other side there's people who undermine or dismiss their friendship entirely#on this note I wanna say that as long as the ship isn't romanticizing abuse and consent is present it's not that much of a crime#and harassment of real people is worse than questionable fictional saygex#i just think it's heavyy mischaracterization of at least one of them#like swinging and missing the mark#I'm saying this to curlya enjoyers too despite me being one#they care for each other they're playful they're teasing#but they don't have to be in a romantic relationship to be just as friendly or doomed#but i don't get to judge on which is the correct way to enjoy characters#I love these characters#hooollyy yapp#would you guys also hear me out on demiromantic demisexual anya#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#asks
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"give us more complex well written flawed female characters and queer relationships"
Nah, you guys ain't even ready to maturely understand CaitVi yet.
#oh remember catradora as well#yeah#just ranting because I'm tired of seeing the negativity going around with zero understanding of media literacy#you guys would probably try to point fingers at korrasami as well#anyways#caitvi#arcane spoilers#caitlyn kiramman#vi#arcane
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