#well technically you can make them with any meat or veggie

[angry-geese]

Sea, Swallow Me

Satoru Gojo x Reader

Warnings: not OSHA compliant. hurt/comfort, light angst, ex-husband Gojo. angry/hate sex, unprotected sex, oral (cunnilingus), fingering.

Synopsis: some ex-husband Gojo smut except him and the reader are still totally in love with each other >:)

a/n: this has been rattling around in my drafts since like march and I finally got my thoughts gathered enough to write it out lol

Word Count: 4.7k

jjk masterlist

Outside, the sky grows dark, signaling an incoming storm. The weather report called for it yesterday; off and on thunderstorms all night, and well into this afternoon. Not uncommon for this time of year. This morning’s grocery trip was one made with the hope of being back before another downpour started, and from the looks of it, you were successful.

Typically, when you come home, the cat is the first thing to greet you. Today, even after she hears your keys hit the counter, she remains just out of view. You don't mind it so much, even if you do find it odd. It gives you time to put away groceries, and the treats you bought for her without her begging for anything. 

The foul weather makes it as good a day as any to spend inside. Plenty of chores need to be done around your apartment, as work has begun to consume much of your free time. That’s nothing new. Certain times of the year are busier than others at Jujutsu Tech. It certainly doesn't help that two people are out due to injuries, and another is on maternity leave, meaning you’re on call nearly 24/7. 

The cat makes herself known only after she hears a can of food open, chirping as she trots into the kitchen. She stays long enough to finish eating, and get some pets from you, before settling into her spot on the window sill, intently watching leaves being blown around outside. You settle on preparing dinner: thawing meat, and chopping veggies for a soup that’ll take nearly an hour to simmer. 

A noise from the other room draws your attention; in the living room, the TV is on—something you vividly remember shutting off. A drama was playing, but the lead was giving you such bad second-hand embarrassment that you just had to shut it off.

Maybe you really are starting to lose it. 

You’ve seen it happen to others. The stress of the job—this way of life—gets to some. You could chalk it up to forgetting; maybe the cat stepped on the remote, or maybe you really did just forget. Come to think of it, didn't you turn off the lights in the kitchen before leaving too?

The back of your neck prickles with fear. Did someone really break in? You know this isn't a particularly nice part of town, but the chance of that happening is unlikely. Besides, there is no sign of forced entry. It's just a feeling of being watched. Nothing is missing, just some lights are on, and the books on your coffee table have been moved around, as if someone looked through them. Why go through the trouble then?

Nothing in particular tips you off to the presence behind you. It comes suddenly, and without warning. Fight or flight kicks in. With your elbow and wrist parallel to your collarbone, you swing outwards.

Any normal person's elbow would have been shattered by that hit. Satoru blocks it with little effort. He uses the weight of your movement against you, allowing you to fall against him. It doesn't take much time for you to realize what he’s doing, and shove yourself away from him.

“You broke in?” You say, although your voice doesn't carry any surprise. “I gotta admit, Satoru, that's a new low.”

“Technically I didn't,” he says, “I explained to the guy up front that I was your husband and he let me in.”

Internally, you curse your landlord, a sweet old man by the name of Saito. He was one of the few people who would let you move in on such short notice. This was never meant to be a permanent placement, but you suppose you don't have much to complain about here. It's an older building, but maintenance is consistent, and the interior has been completely redone. Your neighbors are quiet, pleasant people, and this is a nice corner of the neighborhood. Not nearly as luxe as your previous home, but not bad either.

As he sits down on the couch, the cat jumps straight into his lap. You know it's not fair to project human emotions onto her. She's just a cat. But you swear you see a smug little look on her face. She chirps, and bumps her head against his hand, purring loud enough it's audible across the room. 

“I think I would have rather dealt with a house robber,” you say.

“I mean, if you're into that kind of thing,” he says, “I can put the mask back on. We'll roleplay…”

“Absolutely not,” you say, snatching the remote for the tv, switching it off, “what do you want?”

Even sitting, he’s nearly eye-level with you. His hand comes up to tug at the silver chain around his neck. You don't know whether to feel angry, or sorry for him. Gojo is almost pathetic enough that you feel bad for him. Almost. 

“What?” He asks, feigning hurt. “I can't drop in to say hello to my lovely wife?”

“Ex-wife,” you say. 

Despite your current irritation with him, the separation was about as amicable as it could be. Although it’s not official in the legal sense yet, the two of you have been living separately for months now. There was no great turning moment in your relationship, just a lifetime of little things that forced a wedge between you two. These things happen. You were young when you married, and so consumed with grief that perhaps there wasn't enough thought put into it. You don't blame yourself for it, or for anything that happened. At the age of eighteen, you had a skewed view of the world. Mistakes were common at that age. That’s just part of growing up. You were young, and every emotion felt so much more potent back then. It felt right at the time. Hell, it was right.

Maybe you still love him. It’s hard to spend so much time with someone—have so many memories with them—and not love them.

“Tsumiki has a game Saturday,” he says, “you coming?”

You're slightly offended at the suggestion you would miss it. She sent you a text about it nearly a week ago. You swore to her you'd make it, even going as far as to make arrangements to leave work early.

“Of course I am.” You say. “I’ll take her—I’m off work early anyway.”

It's better for the kids that you remain an active part in their life. Megumi and Tsumiki have already dealt with so much upheaval in their life. It's cruel enough that one caregiver left them, but two? 

You tell yourself you couldn't do that to them. That alone was enough to get you to stay in your old apartment for a few more months. By then, the kids knew something was up. They're smarter than people give them credit for, and there's only so many excuses you can make for sleeping in separate rooms.

It's been maybe a year since then. Six months since you moved out. You wouldn't call it easy, but you’ve settled into your new routine quite nicely.

“Great,” he says, “why not go together then? I’ll drive. We can get dinner together afterwards.”

Your mouth opens in protest. Although it’s phrased as a question, you know him better than that. Satoru will do everything to weasel his way into this situation. Your barely-pleasant expression sours entirely.

“No, thank you,” you say, gesturing to the door, “now get out of my house.”

“Don't be like that, baby,” he says. His arms stretch out towards you, and you immediately dart out of their path. 

“I hated you calling me that when we were married,” you say, “what makes you think I’ve changed?”

“You haven't.” He says. “That’s why I’m still here.”

Within the air here hangs a rift that time won't heal. This room—this space—is too emotionally charged for you to think straight. Your head spins, clouded with anger and spite.

“Don't tell me you left the kids alone to come bother me?” You say.

Tsumiki is nearly fifteen, and pretty independent, but you don't like leaving the kids alone any longer than you have to.

“Of course not,” he says, almost looking offended, “Tsumiki is off at a sleepover, and I got your mother to watch Megs for the weekend.”

“You what?!” 

A look of shock and betrayal crosses your face. You love your mother dearly, really, but sometimes she can be a bit… much. Early on into your marriage, she was asking when you were going to have children of your own. Being freshly twenty at the time, your answer to her was simple: never. Megumi and Tsumiki were enough. You wanted to be able to devote your time—and attention—to them, not a newborn. 

Satoru catches you in your moment of shock, his arms snaking around your waist. Your hands plant on his wrists to shove them away, yet you stop yourself. 

The sound of your phone ringing in the other room gives you a reason to escape. You free his arms from your waist, heading into the bedroom. You don't hear him get up to follow you, yet you know he does. Sitting on the table beside your bed, still charging, is your phone. It’s Tsumiki. You only glance at your phone long enough to see her name, not what she’s saying. 

The end of the bed dips under his weight as he sits. He tries his best to be covert about it, but you feel his gaze wandering around the room. From the photos on the wall, to the papers on your desk, to the stuffed animals on your bed. Oh, you can hear his snide comments now.

“Those earrings are new,” he says. And you swear you hear a slight tone of disappointment in his voice. “Pretty.”

Goosebumps rise along your arm as he reaches out to feel it, brushing across your shoulder in the process. Crystals, although they may be glass, cut to look like gems, dangling from your ears. They’re blue in color; not a light slate, but a deep cerulean. Subtle enough that they’re rather unnoticeable from a distance.

“Shoko gave them to me,” you say.

She took pity on you once she found out about the divorce. Maybe she felt partially responsible, seeing as she was the one who introduced you two.

Getting sent off to the religious boarding school known as Jujutsu Technical college was a major blow to your teenage social life. At fifteen, all you wanted was to go to a normal high school with your normal friends. Yet you weren't granted such a luxury, and instead were thrown into a world you knew nothing about. You quickly found solace, and a strange kind of companionship in the girl that smoked behind the school: Ieiri Shoko.

If you didn't end up marrying him, you probably would have married her. 

For you, it wasn't love at first sight. You could barely stand him in the beginning. It was a rivalry that slowly turned into friendship, ending in romance, albeit with much prodding from Suguru and Shoko. Teenage love consumed the two of you harshly, and entirely.

It wouldn't be until years later, after the wedding, when you would find out they bet on it.

You don't push him away when he kisses you. Just a peck, nothing more. Like you’re teenagers, exchanging affections in the stairwell between classes. When the higher ups would get upset at you, not him, because he was the strongest and could get away with just about everything.

Of course you still love him. How couldn't you?

You were one of the first to look at him as something other than the strongest. Even after the star plasma vessel, and Toji Zenin. Even after Suguru’s death. Even through your own grief, your presence was constant. To him, the concept of not having you around was strange.

The taste of coffee and lipstick lingers on your lips. Your thumb comes up to wipe away the smudge of red that’s transferred to his lips. And you, so pliable and eager, fall right into his lap.

His lips find your neck, hands wandering from your arms, to your chest, to your waist. He’s savoring your closeness—the scent of your shampoo: coconut. Little do you know, he keeps a bottle of the stuff in his own bathroom. If anyone asks, he claims it’s Tsumiki’s. Only you would know otherwise. She hates the stuff, and has been buying her own since the moment she was able to. Really, he keeps it around because he can't bring himself to throw it away.

“Satoru, we shouldn't do this.” You say. You don't really want him too, it’s only to preserve your pride.

Then why is your body responding so well to him? Your body knows this routine. Maybe the last several months of living alone has sped up the process considerably. Blood rushes where it needs to be, and perhaps most shamefully of all, you’re wet. Although you’re not quite prepared yet, it’s just in the early stages of gathering.

A line of saliva connects his lips and your neck as he pulls away. “If you really wanted me gone, I wouldn't still be here,” he says. 

You tell yourself that, if you really wanted him to stop, then you wouldn't have spent so many nights dreaming of this. You wouldn't reach out to the cold spot on the bed beside you. Your subconscious wouldn't long for him in nearly every way imaginable. 

His hands trace across your waist, coming to take yours. They’re warm, albeit a bit shaky. He’s just itching to undress you—to claim what’s his. It's a sick, possessive side of him that’s only fueled by your recent months apart. He comes to kneel before you like a man bowed in prayer. Satoru sits in worship, but not for the favor of a higher being. You might as well be one to him. Should you wish it, the strongest—wielder of the six eyes—would worship the very ground before you. That devotion would soon become suffocating. It was a bandaid on an already failing relationship.

“Still want me to stop?” He asks, squeezing your hands. Whether that’s on purpose, or an accident, you can't tell. “You say no and I’ll stop here. Just give me the word and we won't ever have to do this again.”

In this moment, your body betrays you: you shake your head. You don't truly want him to go; you know that, he knows that. He wouldn't be poking and prodding at every little unhealed wound if that wasn't the case.

“I need to hear you say it,” he says. That’s when you notice what’s on the chain around his neck: his wedding ring. 

It's like he’s mocking you. Of course he still has it. Of course he saw that yours was still sitting on the bathroom counter. 

Satoru has always been like this. He pokes and prods, finding out where you’re weak. What cracks or wounds he can press his fingers into. Pushing boundaries comes natural to him. 

Maybe you’ve changed. Maybe he hasn't changed at all.

“I just want to get off,” you say. 

“Poor baby,” he coos, “you haven't gotten off at all while I was gone, have you? You should have called me. I would have taken care of you.”

“I think I'd rather call Nanami for that.” You say.

The chuckle he lets out sounds nervous. “I know you're joking,” he says, “but judging by the way he looks at you? I think he'd take you up on the offer.”

You believe it. It was a thinly veiled secret that Nanami harbored a little crush for you. The man would never go as far as to pursue his coworker, let alone his coworker's ex wife. This entire time, he’s kept a respectful distance, only speaking about your marriage if you expressed a want to do so. You’ve considered it. Hell, you’ve given it a lot of thought. You think maybe… just maybe, if the two of you were drunk or desperate enough, something could happen. But fraternizing with coworkers in such a way is ill-advised. 

Satoru is going to give him hell tomorrow when he sees him at work. Nanami will be none the wiser, assuming Satoru is up to his usual antics.

“One last chance to back out of this,” he says, “if you don't want to do this…”

“Are you going to fuck me or not?” You ask.

His fingers trace down the curve of your spine, before coming to the hem of your sweater, pulling it up—and over—your head. From him comes an audible little gasp once he realizes you have no bra on underneath. That part wasn't intentional; you need to do laundry, and your shirt was baggy enough that a bra wasn't necessary. Your nipples stiffen once exposed to the open air. Although you know how this looks, it sends a pang of self-consciousness through you, causing you to cross your arms in front of your chest. It’s not like he hasn't seen this before. Maybe it's a last ditch attempt to preserve your pride. And he’s nearly tripping over himself to undress, pulling off his coat, then button-up, then trousers. Off comes your skirt, the silky fabric pooling around your feet. 

If you could stop for a moment and think, it would be endearing: the desperation that falls over you two like teenagers. He can hardly keep his hands off you, while you don't quite know what to do with yours. Eventually, you settle on wrapping your arms around his neck. 

You sit on the edge of the bed before him, still in your panties. Plain black. Nothing fancy, but cute. Maybe if you knew…

You almost scold yourself for thinking such things. It’s not like you had any way of knowing this would happen. You know part of it was to preserve your pride. Being able to move on without seeming like you needed him. He’s not your husband anymore; why go through the effort of getting dressed up?

Beside you, on the bed, he finds a spot to sit. He’s half hard already. His hands ghost up the outsides of your arms, before coming to cup your face. They soon fall to your waist as you move to straddle his lap.

Satoru leans in to kiss you, and it’s… uncharacteristically sweet. That almost makes things worse. If this were something over and done with quickly, that would be tolerable. You could chalk it up to raw emotions or hormones or something other than the fact you still have feelings for him and haven't come to terms with that.

Sex for the sake of mindless pleasure is one thing. It’s tolerable. You can explain it away easily. But the way he handles you—like you’re going to break—sends a pang of pain through your chest. It's too much. Should he act selfishly, that would be far more bearable than this. 

You almost want him to. It would be so much easier if he just took what he wanted, and left.

“Lay back,” he says, “like that. Good girl.”

You scoot back on the bed just far enough to fall against the pillows. Your thighs part just enough to accompany him. The body above yours is warm. His lips find yours, then your neck, then one of your stiffened nipples, softly biting down on it. That draws a sharp gasp from you, although the shock it sends down your spine is rather pleasurable. 

His fingers hook under the waistband of your panties, tugging them down your legs slowly. Achingly slowly. Shamelessly, his eyes linger on the way they stick to your already slick cunt. This moment is only dragging out because he wants it to. They’re tossed away alongside the rest of your clothes. Long, deft fingers come to trace along your slit; teasing motions done by a man who can barely contain himself. The patience of Satoru Gojo has limits, and you’re testing them.

He palms himself through his boxers. He's completely hard now. That doesn't stop him from trailing long, sloppy kisses down your stomach, and up your thigh. His thumb traces across the bundle of nerves. Slow and steady. Just enough to get you aching for him, but not enough to get you anywhere. You try to angle your hips towards him—to grind against him—but Satoru cruelty pulls his hand away. 

“Just… let me have my moment,” he says, chest heaving as he breathes in. 

So he admits it…

His thumb is soon replaced with his mouth, greedily licking and sucking at the bundle of nerves that is your clit. There's little rhyme or reason but it's just messy enough that it'll get you off. First, his index finger pushes into you, then another. Satoru must be moaning nearly as loud as you. The hand that isn't fucking out is wrapped around his cock, and he's bucking into it like it's a warm body. Judging by the noises he's making, he's going to cum, so he stops himself before he does so. You don't. Satoru guides you through your own orgasm, his mouth leaving your clit only after you've stopped trembling. It felt rushed. You're not quite satisfied.

Satoru makes a show of licking his fingers. When he kisses you, this taste only grows more prominent. He's making you taste yourself and you're not quite sure how to feel about it. It's not unpleasant, akin to unripe persimmons in taste.

“Is it how you remember?" You ask, a coy expression spreading across your face.

“Different,” he says, “better.”

There’s no time to grab a condom. Not that you have any in here anyway. Whatever consequences that result from this will be dealt with in the morning.

A small groan leaves him as he bottoms out. It's obvious that he tries to stifle it, and fails, resulting in a noise that certainly has your neighbors questioning things. You'll avoid their gazes in the hall tomorrow morning. This won't become a regular thing, you tell yourself. 

Hardly a few thrusts in and he knows he is going to cum too soon. You can see it all over his face. Pleasure turns to concentration, then thinly veiled stress. The sound of skin slapping against skin fills your bedroom. Some small, sick little part of you is grateful for your thin walls.

You hate him. You still love him. You wish he would walk out of your apartment right now. But part of you can't bear to sleep another night alone.

“You don't know how much I've been thinking about this,” he says, making a noise between a grunt and a huff, “about the way you feel. Taste. I couldn't get it out of my head.”

His mouth finds yours again and the kiss he exchanges with you is dripping with desperation. Something small, and quiet leaves his lips once they part with yours. You soon recognize it as an “I love you.”

He cums sooner than either of you expected, and from him, your name spills past his lips like a prayer. Though, you suppose that this is the closest he'll ever get to praying.

Your own release is still just out of reach. It doesn't take much effort to get him on his back, and you on top, riding him. He’s still hard, despite having just cum inside you. The fruits of his effort can be seen streaming down your thighs. Your movements grow sloppier as you grow nearer to your release, grinding down against him and his softening cock. Within your stomach, it’s as if an invisible band is tightening. Your own orgasm comes out in the form of a noise that sounds like both a moan and a sob. It's anger and pain mixing with pleasure. Tears of frustration are brimming along your lower lash line. You hate him. You love him. You wish he would leave but you don't want to sleep alone. A rift exists between the two of you that time will not heal.

Instead, you lay beside him on the bed. From beside you, he grabs a blanket for you to cover yourself with. As much as he missed the sight of your naked body, he knows this room is cold, and you’ll be getting up to get dressed anyway. 

To him, there’s not a more beautiful sight: you, laying on the bed beside him, leaking of his cum. It would be better if it were his own bed, he thinks, but this'll do. 

“I take it we’re on speaking terms again?” He asks.

“I don't know yet,” you say, “depends on how this conversation goes.”

From beside you on the nightstand, you retrieve your glasses, putting them back on. Outside, the sky still appears dark, only lit up momentarily by a bolt of lightning. The rain has slowed to a drizzle, running down your window in streams.

“Seems like great weather to stay in bed,” he comments. 

An arm snakes around your waist. You debate with yourself on whether or not to shove it off.

“I think some time apart will do us good.” You say, and the arm around your waist stiffens. He seems to be deciding whether to pull away or not.

“And what? Couples therapy too?” His tone suggests he's making a joke, but not one in bad faith.

“Just in general, you need therapy,” you’re only half joking when you say it, despite it applying to you too, “but I don't think there's one that specializes in whatever you have going on.”

“Funny.” He says flatly.

He lays on his back on the bed, and you lay on your side, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. 

“I don't know what I want.” You say, finally. “I guess I could use something to eat.”

You had plans to make a nice, elaborate dinner tonight, although you’re no longer feeling like it. You went through the effort of buying the ingredients, and cleaning the kitchen, so you might as well. 

Satoru follows you as you make your way to the kitchen, stopping once to pull on a shirt. It used to be one of his, he notes. Maybe enough time has passed that you don't remember. Maybe you do. It’s just long enough to fall towards the middle of your thighs—you won't be giving the neighbors a show. He stops long enough to pull his boxers back on, leaving the rest of his clothes discarded on your bedroom floor.

From a cabinet, you retrieve two mugs. On goes the kettle to boil. He watches as you fill the french press with one… two… three scoops of coffee grounds. Just enough boiling water goes in to wet the grounds—they have to sit for a few minutes before the rest is poured in. 

Your taste in coffee hasn't changed much over the years. You still take it with cream and sugar. Satoru—when he does drink coffee—takes it with enough sugar to make your teeth hurt. 

“We must be on speaking terms,” he says, “otherwise I'd have been kicked out by now.”

“If I was going to kick you out, I would have done it before we had sex. Not after.” You say, taking a sip of your coffee. 

Something about the casualness of this moment makes your chest ache; like the last year hasn't happened, and the two of you are just sharing a moment over coffee. 

Neither of you notice the front door opening, nor the jingle of keys being inserted into the lock. Tsumiki, standing in the doorway, nearly drops what she’s holding: a book. Her eyes are wide with a mix of shock, before narrowing into anger. 

“‘Miki!” You say, almost as shocked as her, if not moreso. “What are you doing here?”

“Returning this,” she says, holding up the book in her hand, “I sent you a text about it like an hour ago. What are you doing?!”

Truly, you don't have anything to say for yourself. Your mouth opens, and a few, broken fragments of an excuse come out. Satoru, looking nearly as surprised as you, simply waves to her, before disappearing into another room. That won't help your case at all. 

“Having coffee,” you say, “we were just talking about your game on Saturday.”

She seems unconvinced. Tsumiki, like most teenagers, is a lot smarter than people give her credit for. Silently, she sets the book on the counter, before turning back towards the door.

“I’ll see you at dinner," she says, leaving.

[cyandreamsinwords]

Cut and Run — Pt 2 (BoaWT AU)

Putting out more of this AU because I wanna! And no one can stop me!

Again, none of this is cannon to the main fic, I just like to self indulge. (1.4k)

Link to the main fic here

Pt 1 • Pt 3

Lyra very quickly became very clingy to her father. Which was more than alright with Sirius, because it was far easier to keep an eye on her when she was glued to his side.

Sirius found them a hideout deep in the countryside, far away from his mother, and hopefully far enough away from any witch or wizard who would be able to recognize him. No doubt wanted posters with his face plastered all over them were going up across the nation already--murderer, kidnapper, terrorist.

The place was nothing more than a one room shack with walls so bare you could see right through the gaps. If the owners themselves had forgotten about it, hopefully the rest of the world would too. With the help of his magic, he could enchant the dwelling, making it even more inconspicuous, insulate the walls, make it actually mildly livable for a child. Last thing he wanted was for child endangerment charges to be added to his repertoire. It was also on top of a hill, that made it easy to see anyone or anything coming. It was defendable.

They didn't need the space, not with the way Lyra stuck like a growth to his side. She hadn't really detached since he'd picked her up at the house, and he hadn't exactly asked for the space. Every time she bumped into him or got under foot, it was a reminder that despite the confinement, he was out of his cell, he wasn't locked up, not technically, that there was another living being right there in the room with him.

That could be easy to forget sometimes. And often time he found himself doing so.

She was still quiet. Eerily so sometimes. Watched him with those big hesitant eyes of theirs as he cast his enchantments and spells, never asking what he was doing but always looking like she wanted to. She was still deciding what she thought of him, despite deciding he was worth attaching herself to. He could only hope he was living up to her standards.

"They're spells that make the house less noticeable," he explained to her, even though she hadn't asked. "So people are less likely to look up at it and wonder what’s there."

Her curls bounced as she tilted her head at him inquisitively.

"We don't want people to know where we are. Otherwise I go back to prison, and you go back to your grandmother."

She frowned, and stood back, giving him more room to go on.

He could feel her judgement most when he presented her meals—heated up cans of soup, stew, veggie's or meats, whatever he'd grabbed on his way to her. She just stared down at it, then back up at him imploringly.

"Hey," he said in mock offense, hand to his heart. "It may not be Kreature's cooking, but it's not that bad, promise. It's soup-a-la-dad. That's gourmet, just so you know."

"Wha's that?" she grumbled so quiet it was a miracle he heard.

"It means it's really good."

The soup slopped off her spoon. "...are you sure its gormee?"

Sirius snorted into his bowl. "You know something, Mini Moon?" he laughed, wiping the broth from his lip. "I'm not sure it is." He leaned over and scooted the bowl closer to her in encouragement. "But it's better than nothing, because without that, we don't have anything."

He expected keeping a toddler inside all day would have been difficult, but Lyra wasn't exactly typical in that way. She was quiet and well behaved; she listened when he spoke and did what he told her without having to be asked twice.

Sirius was the badly behaved one.

He'd practically taken to climbing the walls. He tried fixing up the place just a bit to make it more comfortable, but after completing what he could, he found himself undoing it all just to have something to do again. It was like being back in Azkaban, the hours long confinement, nothing but a tiny window to look out of for sunlight and entertainment. At least now it felt like there was a purpose to it, even if that purpose felt further and further away each day. At least he had Lyra, who, as quiet as she was, was company.

A week after they arrived, and the night was upon them, Sirius noticed Lyra standing at the windows, staring out.

He was blowing out the candles they'd used to eat by, only on long enough to do their necessary daily ritual, before going out so they wouldn't draw any attention. "Away from there, Moon. I don't want anyone to see you."

"Can we go out and look at the stars?" She looked back at him, deploying for the first time since their reunion the eyes of a beggar.

His lips quirked down, not excited to disappoint her. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Moon.”

She didn’t argue further, just frowned and stepped away. And really, that’s all it had to take for Sirius to buckle.

With a sigh, he grabbed the blanket off the bed and motioned her behind him. “Just for a little while, then.”

He sat down right outside the doorway, back against the exterior of the house. Lyra jumped into his lap, knocking the air right out of him from the sudden weight. Wrapping the blanket around them both, they lapsed into a peaceful sort of silence, both staring up into the night sky.

“Enjoying this, Moon?” He asked as he shivered, wondering how much longer she’d keep him out here in the cold before she was satisfied. He was glad for the air and the break from inside, but it still made him nervous to have her out here while so unfamiliar with their surroundings.

She nodded enthusiastically and pointed up towards the sky. “Keature says the stars are stories, but he never said what they were,” Lyra told him excitedly in her small toddler speak.

“Yeah, they’re constellations. They all have stories to them. Some even more than one.”

Now she turned those bright eyes on him. “Tell me?”

Sirius huffed. “Shit, Moon, you’re putting me on the spot here. I only barely passed my astronomy class. Dropped it as soon as I was allowed.” He searched for something familiar. “Uuuh…that one. That’s Ursa Major. She’s a bear. And that little one below her, that’s Ursa Minor, that's her baby bear.”

“That one?” She pointed to another.

“Uhhh…I think that’s Draco?”

“That one?”

“I don’t know, Mini Moon,” he sighed. “How about you tell me about that one.”

“Don’t know it.”

“Then make something up. All the stories are, so you can too.”

Lyra thought hard for a minute, staring up intensely. “…beetle.”

Sirius smirked, feeling himself begin to relax. “It’s a beetle, huh? And what’s he done to be up there?”

“It’sa big beetle,” she expanded, holding out her hands to emphasis big. “Flew up really high and got caught in the sky!”

“And why did he fly up so high? Didn’t he know he was going to get stuck?”

“A cat was chasing him! A really mean cat! And it tried to eat him, but he had wings so he flew up high. But the cat could jump so he went—" she made a buzzing noise and flapped her hands. “And then he got too high and didn’t know how to get down!”

“Poor little beetle.”

They did that for a while, pointed out stars and gave them stories. He let her lead, only ever asking leading questions and congratulating her on her storytelling.

Sirius eventually pointed out a lone star. “You see that one, Mini Moon? That’s Sirius, the Dog Star. That one is mine.”

She whipped around to face him. “You have your own star!?”

“I do, and so do you.” He didn’t really want to tell her about the others, about how each of their family members had a set of stars in the sky. They had no place here in this moment. This was for them.

Lyra pointed up at the moon. “That one’s me?”

He laughed, smoothing her hair. “No, but good guess.” He pointed to a different grouping of stars, tracing it with his finger. “That one is you. Lyra. It represents Orpheus’ lyre.”

“Wha’sa lyre?”

“It’s like a harp. The gods gave Orpheus a lyre, and he became this amazing musician. That’s why I named you Lyra." He placed a kiss on her crown. "Because I love you so much, you were such a gift, and if all I ever become known for is being your dad, I’ll be happy.”

She reached one little hand out and brushed something off his cheek, and that’s when Sirius realized he was crying. He didn’t care, he wanted his daughter to know he loved her so much it moved him to tears. He never wanted her to doubt it the way he had with his own parents.

"Again?" she asked quietly.

His heart lurched. "I love you, Mini Moon."

Eventually, she ducked her head in under his chin and fell asleep. Even as he grew cold, he stayed where he was, wrapped in a blanket under the wide-open sky, tears pouring down as he really took in the fact that’s he’d made it out, made it back to her, and that he was able to tell her so and she could remember.

“I love you,” he whispered tearfully, over and over and over again.

[magmacannon]

9, 14, 17, 20, 29, 34 🫵 Roman

yipee!!!!

9. favorite food? least favorite? are they a picky eater? do they have any dietary restrictions?

Roman grew up Really Far North and his food preferences were shaped as such - though he loves a well-cooked or roasted green veggie, his favorite food is a red meat roast cooked in a stock+beer or ale for tenderness/flavor with alliums and tubers/carrots that are served with the meat and maybe a side of bread+butter (hearty stuff). Least favorite food that he's tried was a spiced tomato-heavy salad thing, least favorite food based on concept alone is the fermented bulette meat that his party member tried to make for them ala fermented shark meat.

Roman doesn't consider himself a picky eater - he'll try most things once or twice! - but he also is cursed with Weak Spice Tolerance that bars him from a good amount of food. Rolling a dice here for this last one but he's not allergic to anything BUT.... despite his love for milk, he's sitting as just above having lactose intolerance apparently.

14. are they any good with numbers?

Roman's solid at guessing distances and geometry through practice - you don't want to be a spellcaster, especially an evocation wizard, to have bad aim - and is pretty decent at keeping track of number patterns and budgeting income vs expenses. Higher level or theoretical math is hard for him to grasp but he tries his best!

17. how did they spend their summers/free time as a child?

As a YOUNG child Roman spent his free time either playing at an uncle's lumberyard/hobby farm outside of the walls of Tzeraz or would spend it traveling with his parents within the Northern Kingdom (mostly) while they performed. He has a few friends he'd invite to his house to play (super dramatic war games) besides that.

As he got older and began going to school for magic, his summers were taken up by classes while winter was the big break time where he'd be able to go home for a few months. When with his family and now less-close friends he'd show off what he was learning to anyone who would listen and watch him cast cantrips at snowmen (this annoyed his brother because he'd do it so often). He spent a lot more time daydreaming in his early teens than continuing running around.

20. if applicable, can they drive? if they have their own, what color is their vehicle? is the inside neat and tidy, or a mess?

IN Dorna, Roman's never seen a 'car' in person but he can decently manage to steer a carriage on a well-paved road if needed. He prefers to ride in the back and read/sleep though!

In a world where cars are common he has a minivan that's a little busted up but runs well. He's considering trying to get a Cool Wizard painted on the side. The inside smells decently clean if a little dusty and while the floor's clean, the dashboard compartment and the back have mild piles of stuff (papers/blankets and bags respectively). He travels with ice removal tools Constantly and maybe a portable air pump just in case.

29. are they associated with any particular element (air, earth, fire, water)?

This is ALWAYS a fun one to think of for Roman bc it's changed over time... he's been associated with light/fire for forever if I think about it, but initially I would have def said he was more of a Water Guy. His oldest 'custom' spell was earth-aligned and he casts spells in a very grounded way - I think he wants to be more 'earth' aligned than he actually is in-setting. I think he's probably most associated with fire through how he acts and the magic he casts out of those four options though he wants to be Anything Else atm.

34. how would your character describe themselves? it doesn’t have to line up with how they really are.

Roman would describe himself as a friendly, optimistic guy with a good bit of determination and practice seeing things through (sort of true, he's stubborn). He'd probably say he's 'pretty good' at his job, which is true in that he has a lot of technical skill BUT he lacks focus historically, meaning that he's just Okay at it in truth. He'd say he has a big heart with a lot of love in it, and that's entirely true <3 (he just also has a lot of opinions and some unforseen pettiness, too)

[dirtnote]

weirdly specific asks: 2, 3, 7, 14 (because we love reminding folks to drink water), 19, 25, 28, 30 (Would you ever choose to be immortal, why/not?)

2: thoughts on veganism? i have had thoughts on veganism but my ultimate position is that it's not rlly my business BUT i do think it's something that can only really exist in a world that had an industrial revolution. but also sort of exists as a reaction to it as far as meat products go? it's ironic when people want to go deep with it and claim it's The Way To Be when biologically we are omnivores and therefore need to be very specific with our diets, using grocery store shelf options, if we want to cut out animal byproduct altogether. like i don't think you can be vegan living ~off the grid~ or in literally any survival situation lol. on the other hand a lot of people are vegan because it's the moral thing to be, as far as consumption habits go. you could argue that if you want to consume morally... well you really can't! ALBEIT in this case the focus is on animal cruelty in an industrial context, rather than a goal towards Overall "moral" consumption under capitalism and btw i'm not like, 'critical' of veganism (nor should anyone be because who give a shit. truly. it's just a personal dietary choice) there's just aspects of irony to the mostly fringe internet vegans i'm referring to. and people who attempt to guilt a general audience out of their current eating habits. (i also think there IS a moral way to consume animal byproduct-- like, for example, raising chickens in your backyard and harvesting their eggs... or buying eggs from someone else who raises them that way. not everything is buying from corporations operating thanks to inhumane chicken mills)

3. a specific color that gives you the ick? there are so many colors in the world and i love most of them :) ..

but i'd have to say like, this general pukey highlighter greenish yellow. OR extremely bright yellow on walls. im so sorry. yes colors look better next to others and im not trying to be a yellow hater i promise. my lockscreen is art with a (different) shade of yellow as the background

7. what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium? omg well i'd have to say the octopus and jellyfish :) I LOVE JELLYFISH and just realized i had a dream about them last night. i get to see them in the gulf sometimes which if they are ouch kind is not so fun but we often get the ones without stingers. like moon jellyfish

14. do you think you're dehydrated? i don't think so, i'm usually sensitive to the feeling of being thirsty and generally go out of my way to make sure i have water all the time :) but i was putting off drinking water just now for a while so thank u

19. the veggie you dislike the most? honestly i am absolutely a veggie lover so i had to think about this for a while until i remembered that i dont really like radishes. a rare exception tho

25. would you say you have good taste in music? yes ^_^

28. last meal on earth? omg. this is the most difficult question cus how do i choose!!! also im hungry and should sleep so im just thinking longingly about chicken chimichangas now. i'm sure if i thought about it longer i'd come up with something else but i WAIT HOMEMADE TACOS WITH SOURCREAM LIME DRESSING. ok done

30. free question: would you choose to be immortal? ahh yes the question with the most endless list of pros and cons! on one hand, i'd like to think i'd handle having to be permanently ambivalent (considering the extreme temporary state of everything that comes with being immortal). i'd be curious to see where humanity goes from here, but if things go to shit like a lot of us think it will then im stuck with that!!!! :( and ive got technical questions as well. like if something globally catastrophic happened and everyone Died would i be the only one left for, like, eternity...?? does it last for the entire life of the universe? i dont think ive ever heard anyone ask that before? like do i end up chilling in the vacuum of space watching the last brown dwarf die off at the end of the universe?? so. all that said my answer is no i think. unless i get to sleep for a veryyyy long time like how a vampire does. but probably not so no </3

[candy-floss-crazy]

Gourmet Hot Dog Carts

Gourmet Hot Dog Cart Hire   Either you love hot dogs, or you're wrong. Dive into the deliciousness of our perfectly grilled hot dogs, a timeless favourite that never fails to satisfy. Experience the perfect blend of flavours that make our hot dogs a go-to choice for a quick and delightful meal. What Do You Get When You Hire A Hot Dog Cart? •Regular Or Gourmet Menu •Range Of Condiments & Onions •Can Be Supplied With Fries •Quality Frankfurters •Personalised Service From traditional toppings like mustard and ketchup to gourmet options like caramelized onions and spicy jalapeños, our hot dogs are fully customizable, allowing you to create the perfect combination that suits your taste buds and cravings. Our dawgs don't bite, ask for details. Mobile Hot Dog Stand Hire. You can tailor a hot dog service to any size event, from a private party with 50 guests, to a university ball or corporate events with 2000 attendees. Your options include a standard range of genuine hot dogs. Vegetarian options are available for you on request and you can now even have Halal dogs as well. This is a classic dish, check out it's history here. You have the perfect fast snack for any sort of event. These go down a storm at weddings, but are equally delicious at your company sales days or exhibitions and promotions. Layered with fresh crispy onions then slathered in mustard, ketchup or one of the myriad of other condiments you fancy. Onions come as standard and you have a full range of condiments on offer including; •Heinz Ketchup. •HP Brown Sauce. •English Mustard. •French Mustard. •Chilli Sauce. •Mayo. •Barbeque Sauce.Optional Toppings. We also give you the option of extras such as cheese toppings, chilli and jalapeno,. If you have a particular requirement let us know, we can probably supply that. This is the perfect street food for all events. Including birthday parties, weddings and corporate fun days, they are quick, easy to prepare and serve, and go down a treat. In addition to our American cart above we have a range of fun and quirky carts for rental.   Branding Options. We can custom brand any of our services with; •Custom Printed Napkins. •Printed Plates. •Personalised Signage. •Branded Panels. •Full Cart Colour Change. •Ribbons and Other Decor. You can choose from our range of carts or we can even design and build a one off cart to your precise requirements. With your corporate events branding incorporated. Your selection of catering services can include food and drinks to complement your hire. In addition to our Franks, we also offer other great savoury options, why dont you check out;  Jacket Potatoes, Chipstix and Nachos. More Hot Dog FactsCAN I HAVE VEGGY HOT DOGS; Yes we can provide vegetarian sausages, or a mixture of both. CAN I HAVE TOPPINGS; As standard onions, mustard, ketchup, chilli sauce, brown sauce, sweet chilli. If you want something special let us know and we can source it. WHERE CAN I HIRE HOT DOGS NEAR ME; We provide a hot dog cart hire service throughout the full U.K. so can cover all of your needs. HOW MANY GUESTS CAN YOU SERVE; We have multiple carts and machines so can cover a small private party, right through to a major exhibition or company fun day. ARE HOT DOGS GLUTEN FREE; We can provide gluten free if required. ARE HOT DOGS BAD FOR YOU; Like many things in moderate consumption no, but over excessive consumption can lead to the same issues as red meat. CAN YOU EAT RAW HOT DOGS; Technically they are precooked so as long as they have been handled correctly it would be OK. But we always heat them thoroughly. Our range of mobile hot frankfurter cart hire services are available throughout the FULL U.K. and Europe. Including Lancashire, hot dogs Yorkshire, hot dogs Midlands, The North East, London and Scotland, these are perfect for any type of event including military balls, company fundays, exhibitions, weddings, parties, university and college balls, bar mitzvahs and bat mitzvahs, perfect street food for corporate events or private parties. We no longer provide chocolate fountains. Read the full article

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #133

When did you last drink coffee? I've never truly drank coffee, just tried it a few times and thought it was disgusting each instance.

When did you last cry? And why, if you feel like sharing. Yesterday, a little bit. My sister posted something on Facebook that's happened at work over the past week or so, and it just warmed my fucking heart so much and reminded me yet again my sister is a real-life superhero, like very literally.

What was the last beach you visited and when? Carolina Beach, more than likely. Maaaaaaany years ago.

What book do you plan to read next? The next WoF book is Darkness of Dragons, the last book in this specific arc.

What fictional character/s remind you of yourself? Uh the first one that actually came to mind was Violet from The Incredibles haha, primarily as a teenager though. As I am now, I majorly relate to the character Clearsight in the WoF series, probably more than any other fictional character I've encountered. I resonate quite a bit with Kiara from TLK too, always wanting peace and to follow her heart no matter what.

What's in your fridge right now? List as many things as you can think of. Uh there's milk, yogurt, cheese, water, I'm sure lunch meat, lettuce and I think other veggies, condiments, etc. Our fridge is actually pretty full right now, definitely more than usual.

If you could have any artist, living or dead, paint your portrait, who would it be? Absolutely Nana Qi, much more popularly known as puffygator in online spaces. She makes THE cutest art I've ever seen absolutely anywhere, I am a ginormous fan of her work and I think if anyone has any chance of making me look even REMOTELY cute, it's her, haha. I basically BEG you to check her out.

Do you smell anything in particular right now? No.

Do you make enough money to live comfortably? [can be in combination with a spouse] I personally make zero money, so. My mom doesn't though, we're technically considered impoverished. We survive solely off her disability right now. I'm trying so damn hard to find a job so I can actually be financially useful.

What is one thing you like about your appearance? Don’t say nothing! I just like my hair, or at least how healthy it is and its general style. Not happy with the color right now, but.

What would you like to tell your father? I wish I saw you more. It's not just his fault, though.

What would you like to tell your mother? Thank you for absolutely everything you do to keep me safe, happy, and healthy.

Whose was the last wedding you went to? Bethany and Spencer's as the photographer.

What is your greatest fear? Living alone on the streets.

What is a chronic health issue you deal with, even if it’s minor? I think depression is the longest-lasting and the one that has most heavily affected my life.

What was your college major? If applicable. It changed between Game Design, Photography, Wildlife Biology, and then Art/Photography again.

What new place have you been to recently? Nowhere, lol. I basically never go to new places.

What are you a geek about? Meerkats, Silent Hill, tarantulas, snakes, Rammstein if u didn't already kno, Shadow of the Colossus, other stuff. But those listed are the primary topics I can think of where if you bring them up I will share E V E R Y T H I N G I know under the sun about them lmfao

What is something you have no patience for? Anti-LGBTQ+ opinions and behaviors. Like you are immediately JUST garbage to me.

What celebrity would you want to go out for a meal/drinks with? None realistically, bit too personal an occasion for someone I don't personally know at all. Well, unless it was like, Bindi Irwin lmao, I would take basically any opportunity to get to know her and be friends. It'd be a lot less awkward of an idea because she's not a celebrity that I "like" in a romantic/sexual sense, either, I just think she's fucking incredible and such an icon of love and goodness.

Are you happy with your weight? Hell fucking no, sick and tired of it.

When did you last hold a baby, if ever? Whose? Over three years ago when my niece Emerson was born.

How many cats do you have? One.

How many dogs do you have? One.

How many other pets do you have? One (champagne ball python).

How old were you when you got your driver’s license? I haven't yet, and I don't really think I ever will just with how fucking terrified I am of driving; it's just a fear I don't think I can conquer. I COULD NOT survive killing someone if I was involved in a car crash, like I'd just straight-up fucking kill myself. My panic makes me a dangerously passive driver, and people who know they can't drive in a safe, confident (NOT to be confused with aggressive) manner don't need to be on the road. I'm very well aware of how inconveniencing it is for others that I can't drive, especially with where I live (public transport really isn't a regular or widespread thing), but I'd prefer to not kill or cripple somebody.

What year did you graduate high school? 2014.

What is the first number of your zip code? Two.

How many of your grandparents are still alive? Zero.

What is your favorite number? Honestly don't really have one. I like the dark myths of the number 13, but I don't have a strong fondness for it or anything.

How many kids do you want? IF I have children, I can't visualize a world where I have more than two.

How many apartments have you lived in? As an official, legal resident, zero, but basically two.

What age do people say you look? Very early 20s. Actually the artist who did my new tattoo thought I was like, literally 19 lmfao thanks I guess

Do you feel like your family accepts you for who you are? For the most part. I'm confident my mom fully does, but idk about the others.

Do you feel like your friends accept you for who you are? Yes. I have more liberty in picking my friends; if my friends that I choose aren't willing to accept me, uh bye, our "friendship" is a waste of time.

Who is the best doctor you’ve ever had? The psychiatrist that very literally turned my life around when I began my partial hospitalization program. I stayed with him for many years until insurance made it so I could no longer see him. This is actually what resulted in me being hospitalized again last March; I was so devastated and scared of leaving the ONE mental health professional that REALLY made a difference for me that I became suicidal again. He is an incredible professional with what seemed like a totally unending well of medical knowledge. In the same hospital, when I did the PHP a second time, the therapist that most regularly worked with me was my favorite I've ever had as well; I totally desperately wanted to stay with him once the program was over, but sadly he worked exclusively in that. I wanna emphasize I've been seeing psychiatrists and therapists since the 7th grade (who are around 12 or 13, and I'm 27 now), like I've seen SO FUCKING MANY, so calling you my favorite carries an insane amount of weight.

Have you ever been flipped off by a random stranger? Yes actually, while driving. It was a truck of teenage boys and when they (illegally) passed, multiple of them stuck their hand out the window to do it. My mom was fucking furious lmao, she did it right back.

Do you have a lot of people blocked on Facebook? Not many that I have a personal problem against; most are actually people my mother has asked me to block for a variety of reasons so they have no tabs on my family's lives. Then there's random people who've sent random suspicious or gross messages.

Do you consider yourself spiritual? To a degree. Like I do believe some sort of soul/"essence" of us exists, but that's the end of it. I know nothing about that realm or even if it really exists at all, and I worship nothing or hold nothing as truly holy or whatever.

Do you consider yourself religious? Absolutely not.

Are you afraid of spiders? No, not really; I actually love spiders, especially tarantulas, but I'm not going to pretend that if a big spider just randomly went down my arm I wouldn't freak out for a second, just because I hadn't been expecting it and most of my life I was scared of spiders, so the instinct to be startled is still there.

Are you afraid of snakes? I absolutely adore snakes with all my heart.

Does everyone in your family know your sexual orientation? Not exactly; I think everyone knows I like men and women, but I'm sure there are family members who'd still call me bi because they don't know I later realized I was really pan, AND I know there are a number who don't even know what pansexuality is lmao.

What is one thing you find offensive? Using the word "retarded" to insult someone's intelligence. My respect for you will fucking PLUMMET.

Do you often post about politics on social media? I share lots of political posts, yes.

Would you ever want to go back to school? I just can't do that. I've dropped out three times already, I can't keep pouring money straight down the drain.

What are three things you are naturally good at? Writing, bonding with animals, and I suppose seeing things in an artistic way?

What are three things you are NOT naturally good at? Socializing/talking confidently, asking for help (this does depend though), and thinking more with my head than my heart.

Is your dream to get married and have kids? No, my dream is to be happy with and proud of myself and feel like I made even a tiny difference in the world. I'd be bummed if I never do get married, but it's not my dream.

Where do you hang your towel to dry after showering? It goes in the laundry basket.

If you were the opposite sex, how would you style your hair? Idk, it'd very likely depend on how I look as a whole. I do know I love guys with long hair though, so I'd probably at least have longer hair... maybe. Part of the reason I keep mine short now is because I was bad at brushing it even nearly enough, so I'd probably have that problem as a man too.

Last person you hugged? It was either Girt, his mom, or his sister before leaving his place on Saturday.

How is the weather right now? It's sunny and WAY too motherfucking hot; my weather app says 86*F right now, disgusting.

Are you missing someone? I miss Girt really bad.

What is the wallpaper on your cell phone? Lock screen is artwork of Till Lindemann with the "Engel" wings prop, home screen is insanely cute meerkat artwork.

What do you have handy at your bedside? A lamp. If Girt's staying the night that's also where I put my phone.

What is your dad's middle name? John.

What is your mom's middle name? Marie.

First thing you'll save in a fire? If my mom is in there, I'm making sure she gets out first. If she's not, then I'd probably run and get Venus out of her terrarium first and then immediately look for Roman. I think I'd go for Venus first just because she's in a cage and is also a ball python so she wouldn't be going anywhere and is therefore super easy to find, while I'm sure Roman would probably be frantically running around or like paralyzed in a hiding spot. Really I wouldn't be surprised if Roman found a way out himself if there's an open window or door, being a cat. Deep hatred for this question btw lmao

[chasing-rabbits]

Whilst I appreciate there are some vegans who are 100% ableist and shitty human beings because in every group ever you will have extremists and shitty people because shitty people exist all around us regardless of beliefs race religion etc etc I have encountered such ableist vegans but one thing to note the plastic straw ban as far as I know wasn’t propagated largely by vegans and if anything I saw a LOT of vegans complaining about it because all it served to do was look like activism and patting people on the back making them feel good about themselves for accomplishing a ‘win’ against climate change when they did basically fuck all because it makes up like 0.01% of all plastic in the oceans. I don’t doubt there were vegans promoting it too but all I’m saying is I don’t ever remember it being an entire movement caused by vegans. Personally I think it’s fucking stupid that we get served our iced coffees in plastic cups whilst being forced to use paper straws it’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve seen. And you’re right absolutely ignores people with disabilities including those on the spectrum - my partner hates these new straws and it seems to be a similar issue amongst many on the spectrum. As someone whose disabled and been vegan for 9 years this year actually I’ve had to go from cooking completely from scratch to relying on ready meals almost entirely well that and quick stuff I can shove in the oven. I also have a host of dietary needs including Gluten intolerance which has made it very expensive to do so because gluten free foods are super over priced. I’ve actually been eating fish since the pandemic but I’m still vegan and I’m still accepted by the vegan community or at least those in my circle at present incl a local vegan FB group I’m in. The fact that I’ve currently had to include fish in my diet makes me no less vegan because unlike popular belief veganism isn’t a diet and a plant based diet is separate from veganism. I don’t buy leather or wool. I don’t consume other animal products. I don’t buy makeup but in regards to other items I always look for the cruelty free sign and vegan if applicable. I am living proof of a disabled vegan on low income ( I’m on benefits including disability benefits/PIP I live in the UK) who’s not currently following a completely plant based diet. You could eat an entirely non plant based diet so change none of your eating habits right now and technically still be vegan if you were contributing in other ways i.e not buying leather etc etc. Also many people can do meatless Mondays or reduce their meat intake to some degree and those who genuinely cannot are not the majority. My grandma had issues with Iron as well and not out of any love for animals (although she loved cats) ate a mostly vegetarian diet because it’s honestly just what she preferred but she did eat meat specifically i forget whatever organ it is that’s high in iron uh liver I wanna say it was. She’d every month have that and she did eat meat don’t get me wrong she just preferred other foods. And that’s not me suggesting you could do what she did not at all. This is just me saying that I understand people who cannot eat a vegan diet hell not even a vegetarian diet because of issues such as iron intake because my Grandma had the same and actually they first went veggie because my Granddad had heart issues and she got a bit of a scare as it runs in his side of the family so she was feeding him pulses and all the healthy stuff to try and improve his health but her iron levels got affected because of it plus veggie food in the 60s-80s was not nice apparently according to my mum. Plus my dad used to sneak him a burger every now and again on a Friday as a treat. Anyways now I am rambling but they make a good point above and

Okay listen I’m all for people doing their part to be more environmentally conscious but one thing I really wish was talked about more is how ableist vegan and zero waste communities can be.

A lot of disabled people NEED single use plastic straws. A lot of disabled people NEED precut, packaged vegetables. Same with veganism. I have severe anemia to the point where I have to get iron infusions because my body doesn’t absorb it properly. I tried being vegan but it was not sustainable for me because it made my health issues a lot worse. Veganism is not possible for a lot of people.

And it’s not just physical disabilities either. If your depression prevents you from cooking your own food, go ahead and get the pre made meals. Doing what you can to make things more accessible to you does not make you a bad person. This is not even getting into the financial privileges needed to have an “eco friendly” lifestyle.

If you’re zero waste or vegan that’s great, I’m happy for you but please do not try and push other people to do the same. No one owes you an explanation on why that lifestyle isn’t for them, and no one is a bad person for having a different lifestyle than you.

[chromanebula]

Some Advice for the Fish-Eaters

Hey hey hey Catholic Tumblr (and others who would like to participate), Lent is coming up. (February 22 is Ash Wednesday--technically not a Holy Day of Obligation, but most practicing Catholics seem to go to Mass anyway, and those 18-59 are required to fast unless there are medical contraindications.) Ash Wednesday and all the Fridays of Lent are mandatory days of abstinence from meat for Catholics 14 and up, and fish doesn’t count as meat for our purposes, so it’s become a tradition (as everyone who has ever attended a parish Fish Fry can attest). 

Abstaining from meat even once a week helps your health AND the environment, and fish is packed with omega-3s and other nutrients that make it a healthy alternative, in addition to classic “veggie” fare like legumes. However...there are a few factors to watch out for. 

First: fish is the most prone of any food to be contaminated with methylmercury. We all have trace amounts in our bodies that do us no harm, but it stays in the body a long time and larger amounts can harm the brain and nervous system, particularly in developing babies and small children. So those who are nursing, pregnant or could become pregnant in the foreseeable future, as well as children, need to be extra careful. Second: some fish are caught or farmed irresponsibly. Many species are overfished, and the methods of catching or farming them can harm other marine life and/or the environment. So we need to be mindful of the fish we eat. 

Fortunately, there is a lot of overlap between fish that are good for you and fish that are good for the planet! Large predatory fish--shark, swordfish, orange roughy, bigeye or bluefin tuna, etc.--are a no-go on both counts: their populations are smaller (so more vulnerable to overfishing) and they “magnify” the mercury in all the fish they eat. But other fish that are smaller and lower on the food chain are a win-win! Combing through lists of both low-mercury and eco-friendly seafood, here are some of your best bets: 

Abalone (closed-tank farmed)

Arctic char

Bass, black (trap-caught)

Bass, striped (farmed)

Catfish (from U.S.)

Clams (farmed)

Cod, Pacific (from Alaska)

Crab (from the West Coast or Alaska)

Crawfish (U.S. farmed)

Flounder (from the West Coast or Alaska)

Herring (Atlantic)

Mackerel (from Alaska or Morocco)

Mussels (farmed)

Oysters (farmed)

Perch

Pollock (from Alaska)

Salmon (U.S. wild-caught or farmed)

Scallops (farmed)

Shrimp (U.S. farmed)

Sole

Squid (from California)

Tilapia (from Latin America)

Trout (U.S. farmed)

Tuna (skipjack/canned light and sustainably caught)

Whiting (from New Zealand)

You can (and should!) safely have two servings a week of “Best Choices” seafood. Stay tuned for delicious recipes! 

[wholesomebellies]

Involtini di Melanzane

Involtini di Melanzane is a beautiful meatless dish.

When you eat Involtini de Melazane you feel the nourishment and love that its ingredients have. It’s light dish and extremely tasty.

Involtini di Melanzane needs some preparation time, but worth every single minute.  Eggplant Involtini is a vegan dish with eggplant and thinly sliced vegetables woven into the eggplant with slices of vegan cheese.

When you’re craving hearty, meatless goodness that warms the heart, an Italian classic like Eggplant Involtini will do the job.

Before I became vegetarian mum would always make us a similar recipe, but rather than eggplant she would use sliced chicken breast. Becoming vegetarian 15 years ago has helped me use some of my families’ traditional recipes and create a new twist – this time replacing chicken with eggplant.  It’s a great option for those nights when you’re trying to cut back on meat consumption.

Here’s what you need for our Involtini di Melanzane.  A baking tray and chopping board are essential for food prep.  A sharp knife or julienne grater will make the job easier. measuring cups and a grater to grate the cheese – it’s much easier than trying to slice it thinly!

We finely slice the eggplant about 1.5 cm lengthway, drizzle with olive oil and salt bake it.  Then we with julienned carrots, asparagus, and basil. Roll them up before topping them with a classic tomato sauce topped with vegan cheese.  Finally, they go into the oven to cook completely for about 10 minutes until soft.

Asparagus is a healthy addition to any recipe. Add one bunch to your Involtini Melenzane for an extra dose of vitamins and minerals.  Adding four leaves of basil to this recipe will enhance the flavor. Our fresh basil gives the dish an extra punch you won’t forget! We will also be using passata – or even tinned tomatoes.  Tomatoes are versatile and mild practically a superfood packed with vitamins and fibre, and you’re going to consume a high concentration of beautiful antioxidants. There are certainly health benefits you can gain from that.

This recipe is a great way to indulge in a healthy diet. Add mozzarella cheese or your favourite vegan cheese, to make this dish delicious

Eggplants, also known as aubergines, are technically a fruit and belong to the nightshade family of plants. They come in many different varieties, ranging from purple to green and round to elongated.

Prep time: 15 minutes Cook time: 30 minutes Total time: 50 minutes Serves: Makes approx 8 eggplant rolls

Ingredients Sugo 1 onion (medium size) 2 tablespoons olive oil 1 bottle passata 1 teaspoon salt 4 fresh basil leaves

Involtini 1 large eggplant (about 600 grams) 1 bunch asparagus 1 large carrot julienned 150 grams of nozarella cheese (or any vegan cheese) 1 teaspoon salt

Method Sugo

Cut onion into small medium pieces and sauté in olive oil until caramelised. Add bottle passata, basil and salt Let simmer on medium heat for up to 30 minutes.

Involtini

Slice eggplant into thin slices about 1.5 cm lengthways. Rub eggplant with infused basil olive oil and sprinkle with salt. Bake in oven about 10 minutes until soft Meanwhile julienne the carrots and asparagus. Once the eggplant has cooled, line the eggplant with a two to three thin slices of mozarella, and three to four julienned carrots and asparagus. Roll up the eggplant. In a baking dish line bottom with a thin layer of tomato sugo, then place your rolled up eggplants on the sauce, top with sauce and nozarella cheese. Bake in oven at 180 degrees for 20 - 30 minutes.

Equipment you Need Chopping Board Baking tray Sharp knife or julienne grater Scales to weight vegetables Measuring Cups Grater to grate cheese

Now let’s talk about this incredible plant – eggplant!.

Eggplants are a nutrient-dense food, meaning they contain a good number of vitamins, minerals, and fiber in a few calories. Specifically, this veggie is packed with vitamin C, which helps maintain a healthy immune system as well as vitamin K, which helps build strong bones and blood vessels.

I am often asked “Am I supposed to salt my eggplant”.  To be honest, I never do and back in the day, this was a practice often done to help release the bitterness from the eggplant.   If you know my recipes and know me well, by now you’ll know that I’m not a very complicated chef, so salting eggplants is just another step I don’t have time to do.  And to be honest, I’ve never cooked eggplant and found it to be bitter. So, let’s just make things easy and skip this ‘salting eggplant’ step!

Eggplant is one of those vegetables that can be overwhelming for people and hard to figure out the best way to cook it.  To be honest, remove those blockages from your mind, grab yourself an eggplant, and create some magic.  It can be used in many different dishes. You can grill or use them in a salad, stir-fry, roast and then blend to make baba ganoush. They’re also a great vegan substitute for meat in some recipes.

Some of my favorite ways to use eggplant are in a pasta sauce, with Asian sauces as a stir fry, and rice. I also use it in a Moroccan stew with chickpeas. It’s so versatile!

To learn how to make recipes like this and more check out our huge range of vegan cooking classes in Brisbane.  Our vegan cooking school has so many classes and recipes where we can guide you toward a healthy, plant-based diet.

Frequently Asked Questions How many eggplant roll does the recipe make?

The recipe makes approximately 8 to 10 rolls depending on how large your eggplant is.

How long will they last?

The eggplant rolls should last up to 3 or 4 days in the fridge. Reheat in a microwave or oven.

Can you store them in the freezer?

Absolutely.  You can freeze them for up to 4 days. Make sure they’ve cooked down and then place them in an airtight container and freeze.Then heat straight from frozen in microwave.

[innitnotfound]

Brooooooo I just watched one of those popin cookin candy making kits and omfg the candy onigiri are making me hungry I REALLY want an actual onigiri now

I don't even know what actual onigirl are like I'm literally making this post in the heat of the moment i just know that there's rice and seaweed involved and I should probably eat something

[erimeows]

Hey, what about some professional chef S/O, like Ramsey level but a bit less of a terror. Like, for some weird reason bots and cons can, temporally, consume human food and their S/O offers them to show them the endless wonders and finese that is human cousine. What would their S/O make for them, asuming they accept the offer, and what would be their reactions? Who would be mindblow and love it? Being able to consume only energon/oil and having no other source of food sounds quite depressing...

Ooh, this sounds fun! I don't talk about this often, but I have a headcanon that the TFA bots can consume human food while in their earth vehicle/robot modes- I just don't include it in pieces I write because I don't want to get ten comments around the lines of "well, ACTUALLY, they can only ingest ENERGON and OIL", ya feel? Anyways, this'll be a fun one; TFA Characters With A Chef S/O Who Wants To Cook For Them headcanons are under the cut! Enjoy <3

Optimus Prime: He’s happy to try your food because it’s something you love making. He’s really into things that are either extremely sour or extremely salty; french fries, pickled vegetables, sour candies, green beans, etc.

Ratchet: He’s reluctant at first, insistent that it can’t be good for him to ingest food he’s not technically meant to ingest, but with enough convincing from the others, he finally tries it. His personal favorites are tacos, burritos, rice, and vegetable bowls. 

Prowl: He tries your cooking because it’s a sweet offer and it’ll be nice to partake in something that you’ve become passionate about to make your career. His favorite foods end up being soba noodles, rice, and stir fry made with veggies and no meat- he just likes the texture and doesn’t like meat at all... He also just feels bad consuming animals, too.

Bumblebee: He’s been wanting to try human food since he got to earth, so hell yeah he’s excited about trying your food! His favorites are things like breakfast foods; pancakes, eggs, waffles, bacon, toast, and more. 

Bulkhead: He’s too embarrassed to ask you to cook for him but wants to try human food pretty bad after Bee raves about it, so he’s glad that you’re the one to make the offer. He ends up being really into meat and basically meat only; burgers, steaks, chicken, pork chops, bacon, sausage, etc. Oddly enough, though, he also loves vegetable substitutes for meat like cauliflower steak and veggie burgers.

Jazz: One of the first things he wants to do when he gets to earth is try human food, so when he finds out you’re a chef, he’s like... It’s meant to be! Amazing! You make a lot of food for him to try, and his favorites end up being seafood like shrimp, lobster, and crab with different preparation techniques and flavoring. He’s not super into actual fish, though.

Sentinel Prime: At first, he insists that organic food must be disgusting, but then he smells you cooking it one day and he’s hooked. He’s one of those people who hyperfixates on like two foods and doesn’t want anything else, so all he wants is bread, but on the bright side, he’ll eat any kind of bread; his favorite are white bread rolls with butter, freshly rolled out, baked in the oven, and piping hot.

Ultra Magnus: He doesn’t get the point, but he’s old and has pretty much stopped caring so he’ll try anything once. He actually ends up being a huge fan of your cooking and wants it all the time, but doesn’t want to bother you by asking, so you always have to be the one to offer. His favorite things for you to make are steak, chicken, grilled corn, and mashed potatoes.

Megatron: He initiates you cooking for him because he gets tired of the same energon and oil he has on earth and doesn’t have access to the flavorings he usually has on Cybertron for it. He knows he needs to eat/drink something different or he’s going to go insane. He ends up being more into fruit and fruit dishes than anything, popping grapes like pills and craving smoothies, salads, etc. His favorite things that you make are fruit-centered desserts or any savory dish made with wine.

Starscream: He acts like he doesn’t want it at first, but the second you act like you’re going to listen and not cook for him, he changes his mind. He ends up being more into sugary human drinks than human food, though, enjoying your cooking because you made it and you’re special to him but ultimately preferring smoothies, sodas, juices, snow cones, flavored water, and milkshakes. 

Blitzwing: The different personalities have different feelings about you cooking for them and them ingesting human food. Blitzwing thinks it’s pointless and a waste of perfectly good human food since he has energon for himself, Hothead is excited at the thought but won’t admit it, and Random is HYPE. 2/3 majority vote wins and you end up making different foods for them to try. Icy likes ice cream, Hothead likes spicy chips and cooked bell peppers with a dip like hummus or ranch, and Random likes cakes and chocolates. 

Lugnut: You’d cook for him...? He’s honored and so very excited! He loves everything you make and will eat it all. He can eat you out of house and home and, surprisingly, has no problem with the concept of constantly ingesting human food even though he isn’t really used to it. He’s not super picky and doesn’t have preferences, just loves it all, so he doesn’t have a favorite. 

Shockwave: He doesn’t accept at first, thinking that it’s easier to just drink the pre-made energon; it’s more logical than wasting time cooking, right? But if you just bring him food without asking beforehand, he can’t deny it. His personal favorites are pudding and cookies. He’s got a horrible sweet tooth. 

Soundwave: He reluctantly lets you cook for him but doesn’t like it. He’s only likes raw vegan foods for taste, texture, and moral reasons, so expect him to be eating a lot of salads, fruits, and nuts. His favorite snacks are cucumber slices, and he’ll sit around and eat onions and tomatoes like they’re apples. Even the other Decepticons think he’s disgusting for doing it.

Swindle: His first thought is that it sounds expensive, and he already has energon to fuel with... But if you so insist and you’re the one paying for ingredients and whatnot, he doesn’t mind the thought of trying human food; he’s an adventurous mech, after all! You start cooking for him regularly, he likes it so much that he insists on paying for it, and unsurprisingly, he’s into the finer things like beef wellington, panna cotta, duck, caviar, etc. 

Lockdown: He doesn’t hate the idea of you cooking for him; saves him on energon, right? He actually asks you to do it first- he’s only on earth and able to try human food for so long at a time, after all. His favorites end up being hearty soups and stews like tomato soup, chili, etc.

Blackarachnia: Human food...? It doesn’t sound that good. The fact that it’s solid is already kinda gross, but she can ingest it a lot better than the others can because of her organic side- the spider aliens usually eat other bugs, though she certainly has never partaken in that. She tries to help you cook but is really bad at it and just allows you to do it. Her favorites are homemade fish and chips, and basically anything else that’s fried or crunchy.

Wasp: The thought of human food disgusts him at first, but if you really want him to try your cooking, he’ll do it. Wasp is a surprisingly sensitive soul after all and he knows it’s something your passionate about. Even after you get him to eat your cooking, the few things he likes are pastas and some other Italian food. 

[movedtodykedvonte]

Okay but I can’t get the idea out of my head that lady d actually has a really sweet tooth. Like her biggest indulgence is anything sweet. Her favorite however I like to think is lemon meringue and any sort of sour gummy. Oh and chocolate ice cream holds a special place in her heart

I’ve been wanting to do head canons on the lords’ eating habits and these give me an excuse.

Alcina Dimitrescu

She is from a noble and regal background, so of course she has very high standards in terms of food. This translates to blood as well, quality over quantity. (She wouldn’t drink from someone unfit)

I love the idea she had a sweet tooth, blood and flesh must’ve sucked at first as it is metallic and tangy but she learned to love it.

I think she’d like more out there and complex sweets, things that look or sound fancy: Eclairs, Tiramisu, parfaits, macaroon, etc. But I think she’d also be fond of something traditonal: Arlechin, Cornulete cu Gem, Cozonac (I had a Romanian teacher who brought in these)

As for food, I like to think she’s big on savory things, not salty, but something with a lot of flavor and texture

Again, only high quality ingredients or she won’t dare take the plate, let alone try some. This is of course she’s not more interested in eating you

Donna + Angie

Again, Angie has convinced Donna that eating only sugary treats and snacks is the way to go, this of course is not good

Doesn’t really have a type she goes for but it has to be pretty and be able to plate nice for parties or table settings. This often rules out candies that burst, pastries that fall apart and drinks that can separate

Not a big eater either, so everything is like appetizer sized, she mostly snacks on these things throughout her day (Will sometimes share with Moreau and Alcina if they cross her path)

As for food? It’s also sweet things. Honey glazed, sugar rubs, sweet rolls and things with fruit cooked with them so the sugar makes it sweet. You’ll find it impossible to feed her anything else

Secretly sneaks vegetables when no ones looking. She doesn’t want Angie to know her lies

Salvatore Moreau

I had a long debate over whether him eating fish is technically cannibalism, weirdly fucked or absolutely normal. The conclusion was Sal would not eat fish as they are his only friends in the reservoir 

He probably throws up so much because all he really eats is cheese, not because he can’t get other things, I just think it’s a comfort food and he needs all the comfort he can get

Of course, as a cheese lover he’d like crackers and breads and fruits. Pretty much his diet is like a make shift Charcuterie Board. Probably like Donna where he eats a small amount at a time but is munching all day

Meat. Meat is a specials case as he only really eats it in his big fish-toad form and it usually the livestock that swim into the reservoir. Occasionally he’ll slip up and eat a person but shit happens y’know.

Probably would cry if offered a cooked/warm meal, the reservoir doesn’t look to have a place to cook stuff and he is probably too sensitive to fire to cook it that way. Ixnay, everything besides the cheese is raw.

Karl Heisenberg

I think I mentioned he only eats the worst of the worst food. He is very spiteful towards Miranda and if his body was supposed to be a vessel he’s gonna ruin it for her

No fruits or veggies, lots of meats and sweets, it’s one the few things he and Alcina have in common. Of course, he likes all the processed garbage she loathes; chips, sodas, things like Twinkies

Likes hardy meals too, I think he’d eat heavy so he could work for a long time without needing to refill for a while. But it’s like dad/man food. Those combinations of things that don’t go but it’s edible.

Has the gene that makes cilantro taste like soap (weakling) Alcina sneaks it into his food

For the spicy Ethan anon, I bet Karl is the type ot put hot things into foods that have no reason to be like that. He’d put it in a milkshake or some crushed pepper on a cake as sprinkles

[brewerssupplies]

because I love worldbuilding and it's a ton of fun seeing your answers, here's my weird niche worldbuilding question for Kovaud- what's some of the common foodstuffs in any given area you'd like to describe? Like farmed grains and veggies and fruits or livestock, or are there any unique foodstuffs found on Kovaud that don't exist here on Earth that you've thought about?

So a big one is that goodberries are naturally occurring, the only thing the spell does is imbue them with the magic to sustain a creature for as long as they do and restore a hit point. Goodberries resemble a mix between cranberries and blueberries in shape and color. They are often used in wines, jams, ales, and other similar foodstuff. Another fun fact is they are in fact not even technically native to Kovaud, they were brought over from the previous world in the cycle by Kevin Goodberry an inhabitant of that world that managed to survive its destruction.

Most of the farming and agriculture in the nation of Emeras is done around the Thundering Plateau as it is experiences a fair amount of rain throughout the year. The Ruby Marshes are another place where agriculture is common in Emeras. They're druidic magic allows them to farm a variety of crops from just about anywhere on Kovaud.

A lot of recipes make use of meat and other parts from the various fantastical monsters and creatures that exist. In Hjellvast the body of a single dread wyvern can be a boon to the food stock of a village. Making use of the abundance of meat they provide and even incorporating its venom which has a sour-sweet taste into recipes.

The inhabitants of the Ghost Archipelago shun the consumption of fish due to the curse laid upon the Mournful Sea. The curse that makes sealife that have died within the past 24 hours rise from death to terrorize the sea. As you would imagine improper consumption of fish can be fatal. They do a lot of trade with Hjellvast and Spyros for food. The ghost elves and soberek do maintain their own ancient agricultural practices on the islands.

Spyros is a vast desert and sees a variety of hardy and hydrating plant life. The diet of an average citizen of Spyros is heavily plant based. The most common crop is gritroot, a vegetable that grows entirely under the sand in large masses. It has high water retention which it leeches from further underground.

Kovaud is also home to livestock equivalent to what's standard on Earth. There are some exceptions however. In Emeras, Hjellvast, and Xyrno there are the Kravwen, a large four-legged bovine creature that can get anywhere between 5-18 feet tall. They are excellent producers of milk that lends itself well to the production of butter and cheese. Ouroboros has the serpentine behir which they farm for meat. The nation of Saurdane is host to a variety of traveling herds of livestock which are shepherded by the traveling clans of giantkind (orcs, goliaths, and firbolg are included as members of giantkind).

And that's where I'll end this post as it's starting to get a little long! Thank you very much for the ask! Gave my brain good exercise!

[wild-ditto-appeared]

This question is for both ditto and mun (if you want!)

What is your opinion on Milk? Like,everyday,normal whole milk?

Its for research

Sweet yummy milk make Ditto sqush with delight :D

As for me... I can't physically bring myself to drink milk just on its own. Cereal with milk? Sure. Oatmeal with milk. Milk as long as it's not on its own (or spaghetti in milk--and yes, I swear to you I've had that before and it's a real thing, it was essentially a poor person's breakfast in Russia that for some reason the rest of my family likes that I just DON'T) is awful and makes me feel physically ill.

Now, of course, I will still encourage people to drink milk, so long as they can stomach it. Milk is good for da bones, and even if you have it with something else you still get those necessary vitamins.

As for Ditto, it's a baby and... well, technically it can eat any food, since all it has to do is Transform to give itself teeth, but having teeth is difficult for babies that are still learning motor skills. This is not just talking about human babies, of course, but animals, too. You see little puppies or kittens tripping over their own paws or tails? They're learning motor skills just like human babies are.

It's why Ditto's scrawls are hard to read unless they're really big and made with short letters and words, and even still it's a little tough to make out unless you've learned Ditto's Flavor of writing. The same goes for eating.

Ditto enjoys eating softer foods because it's easier. Fruits, Berries, liquids and the like are all Ditto's preferences. Harder vegetables like carrots or broccoli are tougher to eat unless Ditto Transforms and either gives itself teeth or becomes a Pokemon with teeth--usually it does the latter because, in a Ditto's mouth, having teeth is inconvenient--and it ends up biting its tongue or lip a lot. Ditto struggles even with eating apples for this reason. That's why, if you feed Ditto, you should cut the fruits and veggies. Bonus points if you can make them different shapes for Ditto's entertainment! Ditto isn't a picky eater and can eat essentially anything.

As a species, Ditto are omnivores. They could be the prey or the predator, it doesn't matter. My Ditto, however, doesn't like to eat meat because it doesn't like the idea of eating potential friends. This changes slightly in other worlds, like say in the Yu-Gi-Oh! world, where Ditto had at one point tried to ask the fish where the nearest human settlement was, thinking they'd respond like normal fish Pokemon would have, and didn't get an answer. In other worlds that are not the Pokemon world, Ditto doesn't mind eating fish because they were shown to be unresponsive to Ditto's attempts at communication and thus Ditto deemed that they have no consciousness. I mean, it's not necessarily true, but not necessarily untrue either. What was the fish supposed to do, talk?

In short, Ditto's eating habits are soft foods, fruits and veggies, NO meat, and in worlds other than the Pokemon world, fish, because they don't count as meat if they can't make noise apparently.

[candy-floss-crazy]

Gourmet Hot Dog Carts

Gourmet Hot Dog Cart Hire   Either you love hot dogs, or you're wrong. Dive into the deliciousness of our perfectly grilled hot dogs, a timeless favourite that never fails to satisfy. Experience the perfect blend of flavours that make our hot dogs a go-to choice for a quick and delightful meal. What Do You Get When You Hire A Hot Dog Cart? •Regular Or Gourmet Menu •Range Of Condiments & Onions •Can Be Supplied With Fries •Quality Frankfurters •Personalised Service From traditional toppings like mustard and ketchup to gourmet options like caramelized onions and spicy jalapeños, our hot dogs are fully customizable, allowing you to create the perfect combination that suits your taste buds and cravings. Our dawgs don't bite, ask for details. Mobile Hot Dog Stand Hire. You can tailor a hot dog service to any size event, from a private party with 50 guests, to a university ball or corporate events with 2000 attendees. Your options include a standard range of genuine hot dogs. Vegetarian options are available for you on request and you can now even have Halal dogs as well. This is a classic dish, check out it's history here. You have the perfect fast snack for any sort of event. These go down a storm at weddings, but are equally delicious at your company sales days or exhibitions and promotions. Layered with fresh crispy onions then slathered in mustard, ketchup or one of the myriad of other condiments you fancy. Onions come as standard and you have a full range of condiments on offer including; •Heinz Ketchup. •HP Brown Sauce. •English Mustard. •French Mustard. •Chilli Sauce. •Mayo. •Barbeque Sauce.Optional Toppings. We also give you the option of extras such as cheese toppings, chilli and jalapeno,. If you have a particular requirement let us know, we can probably supply that. This is the perfect street food for all events. Including birthday parties, weddings and corporate fun days, they are quick, easy to prepare and serve, and go down a treat. In addition to our American cart above we have a range of fun and quirky carts for rental.   Branding Options. We can custom brand any of our services with; •Custom Printed Napkins. •Printed Plates. •Personalised Signage. •Branded Panels. •Full Cart Colour Change. •Ribbons and Other Decor. You can choose from our range of carts or we can even design and build a one off cart to your precise requirements. With your corporate events branding incorporated. Your selection of catering services can include food and drinks to complement your hire. In addition to our Franks, we also offer other great savoury options, why dont you check out;  Jacket Potatoes, Chipstix and Nachos. More Hot Dog FactsCAN I HAVE VEGGY HOT DOGS; Yes we can provide vegetarian sausages, or a mixture of both. CAN I HAVE TOPPINGS; As standard onions, mustard, ketchup, chilli sauce, brown sauce, sweet chilli. If you want something special let us know and we can source it. 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[hiheat]

Keto: Shepherd's Pie

I like making this classic British dish, and it's fairly easy to make a keto version of it.

The important thing is to make sure each component is delicious by itself before adding it to the final pan in layers.

For me, the first step is to make the mince. I use lamb, as that's the classic meat. You can certainly use ground beef or other protein. (Note that technically it's called Cottage Pie if made with beef.,)

I brown onions in fat, add the ground meat. Cook until done and season with s&p garlic and onion powders. If you're using beef you should probably pour off some of the fat. Lamb is less fatty, so it's actually useful to keep. I add ground mint to my lamb as well.

I also add some sweet peas to this layer. It's reminiscent of classic Mushy Peas, and i think it helps keep the mince from becoming a big burger patty.

At this point, you can decide if you want your Pie to be dry or runny. I personally like it runny, so i add a thickener (this time I'm using guar gum to keep carbs down) and then some stock (or water) until you have a thick stew consistency. If you're not going for keto, you can use corn or potato starch or simple flour. You shouldn't need any additional fat, just make sure you cook down the thickener before adding the stock. Do a final adjustment of the spices.

Next, you want a vegetable layer. You can really use anything you want. Simple mixed veggies (pass, carrots, corn) are easy. Mushrooms can be integrated or made a separate layer. This is a good chance to use old veggies in your fridge. Mine is peas, squash, spinach, onions, mushrooms, garlic, and celery. Again, season to taste.

To keep it keto, i substitute cauliflower mash for mashed potatoes. Feel free to use whichever you want.

I'm experimenting with this product: Seasons Choice mashed cauliflower from Aldi. I'm actually quite pleased with it. It had good flavor and is only slightly too wet. Next time I'll try draining it after microwaving it I added parmesan cheese as a stabilizer, s&p, garlic and onion powder.

Finally once all components are cooked and tasty on their own, add them to a greased pan.

Mince first:

Then gently add the mushrooms and/or veggies. Try not to mush around the mince as you spread it.

And then you can dollop or pipe the mash on top. A nice decorative pattern always makes a nice presentation. I add a bit of paprika on mine to set off the pattern of the piping:

And then bake until the gravy is bubbling and the mash is brown but not burned or dry maybe 30 minutes at 350.

Let sit for 10 minutes before serving - the gravy will be like lava. :)

I hope this is a helpful keto adaptation!

Happy Eating!