#weirdly the left side popped audibly but it was definitely the right side that got all the pain

[sheliesshattered]

I’m always surprised by how exhausted I get after a bad dislocation. It happens often enough that you think I would have learned to expect the exhaustion, but nope, every single time I’m like whaaat, whyyy??

[personasintro]

how love works | myg drabble

⏤𝘴𝘺𝘯𝘰𝘱𝘴𝘪𝘴; your new colleague who ends up showing you around in your new job, finds his way to your broken heart

⏤𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨; yoongi x reader

⏤𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦: fluff, nurse!yoongi, single mom!reader

⏤𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 5.5k

⏤𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: strong language, making out, mentions of sex

𝘢/𝘯: commissioned by @hyacinthgrrls​, thank you for being so patient about this one! I'm sorry if this one seems to be messy, but I really tried to squeeze everything you wanted here!

...I'd be more than happy to show you around, but unfortunately, my shift already started and I need to be there before Dr. Jung throws a fit,” His words are unclear, barely audible as he rushes through a long hallway, greeting a few patients along the way.

It feels like all hospitals look the same – white walls with a little bit of different, but still nonchalant colors popping every now and then. This one is matched with beige color, visible thanks to the intensive white lightening. The omnipresent smell of antiseptic caries through the whole hospital.

“Yoongi is going to show you around.” Namjoon, as you've learned his name just five minutes ago, says and briefly looks over the shoulder to check up on you, making sure you're catching up with him.

It's tough, his long legs move quickly and you barely get to catch up with him, ushering behind him. He finally stops in front of the white door, the same ones like all those tens you've just passed by, before he pushes it open and walks in. Following him, you close the door with a soft thud as you try to get a glimpse behind Namjoon's tall figure. He moves away, allowing you to see the whole room. It's medium sized room with two wooden tables next to the windows, a small kitchen unit on the left side with a white fridge.

It must be a break room, but before you can look around, your attention is caught by Namjoon's voice and another person in the room.

“Great, you're here!” Namjoon calls out enthusiastically, smacking his hands together as the young man with dark hair stares at him. “You're going to show Y/N around.”

His eyes widen, before he frowns with his puffed cheeks as he holds a sandwich in his hands. “I'm on my lunch break!” he exclaims with his full mouth, visibly annoyed by the sudden interruption of his chance to finally eat and take a break.

“I know, but Jung needs me and you're the only one free.”

Namjoon doesn't seem to be surprised by the man's grumpy attitude, not even when he grunts in annoyance at him. You watch the dark haired man swallow, putting down his sandwich before he opens his mouth.

“I'm not free, I'm on my lunch break.” he reminds him, dusting off his blue scrubs that nicely contrasts with his pale skin.

Understandably, you get his reaction of having to show someone around when it's his time to finally eat. You don't take it personally, but it still leaves you awkwardly standing next to Namjoon with tongue poking the inside of your cheek.

“I can wait.” you speak up, their eyes snapping to you as the man opens his mouth before he can, Namjoon already interjects.

“No, someone needs to show you around. It's your first day but you need to get to work as soon as possible.” he dismisses your idea immediately, glancing at his colleague that fumbles with his eyes before he sighs.

“Fine.” he mutters, tossing his almost untouched sandwich down onto the table.

“Great!” Namjoon exclaims in excitement and claps his hands again. “See you guys later!”

Not even waiting for you response, he's already out of the room and leaves the two of you alone. You wonder if the man hates you for not being able to finish his sandwich, which doesn't even look like a proper lunch, because of you. He sighs, leaving you standing awkwardly in the middle of the room with your handbag clutched in your hands.

“It's okay if you want to finish that,” you speak up, feeling like you need to do something rather than just staying in silence with awkward atmosphere in the air. “I can wait.”

You've heard Namjoon, so did he, but you just need to say something and you feel bad for being a burden to him. The man looks up, meeting your eyes properly this time, and you expect him to glare at you or at least show kind of irritation, but his gaze is soft.

“No, it's okay I can finish it later,” he says, speaking to you for the first time with much more relaxed tone than he spoke with to Namjoon. “It's your first day here, huh?” he chuckles, packing his sandwich and places it into the fridge.

“Yeah,” you answer with a mere smile, noticing the untouched cup of coffee on the counter which makes you feel even more bad.

“I'm Yoongi,” he tells you, stretching his arm towards you. You take it, glancing into his dark orbs as you tell him your name.

Something about him makes you want to observe him, maybe it's his interesting personality you got to see and even though you don't know him, he doesn't look as intimidating as you first thought now that you think about it.

“Very well then, let's go before Namjoon bursts through those door again,” he jokes, causing you to laugh at that, remembering how in rush he's been ever since he introduced himself to you. “Come on.” he walks up to the door and opens it, motioning for you to go first as you thank him, ushering back to the busy hallway.

If Yoongi ever felt annoyed by the sudden interruption of his lunch break, he definitely doesn't seem to be in a bad mood at all. He's very polite, showing you each floor and explains how it works there, answering your every question with friendliness and even briefly talks about himself when you ask how long he's been working here.

For some reason, you're surprised when a 'four years' as an answer resounds from his mouth, you don't even know why but it makes sense, judging how much he knows about their work ethic and other employees. He makes you chuckle couple of times, whispering about some of the older nurses, warning you to stay away from them because they're grumpy all the time. You're pleasantly surprised by his humor and thanks to him, the nerves you've been feeling the whole morning are eased up. He doesn't know it, nor you acknowledge it loudly but you're grateful for him being the one who shows you around.

When he tells you it's your time to get changed to your work attire, you can't help but feel disappointed over the fact that it's over. His presence is weirdly pleasing and nice, and you wonder if the rest of your colleagues are such nice people as him.

He leads you through the hallway which you recognize as the same where the break room is, before he stops in front of the identical door, just with the different sign next to it.

“This is the dressing room, obviously, women and men have separated rooms.” he informs you, opening the door as he lets you to walk inside first before he follows after you.

You don't expect anyone to be there, especially not a woman wearing jeans with a bra covering her breasts as she looks at the both of you. Your cheeks heat up, not at the sight of her not covered chest, but from the situation. She doesn't seem to be phased, and her smile spreads into a huge grin as she cocks her brow at Yoongi.

“If you wanted to see me naked, Yoongi, you know all you need to do is just tell me.” she speaks up, lips curving into a smirk as she pulls out a shirt out of the opened locker, putting it on.

“Well, see, I'm not here for you.” he says nonchalantly, not phased by her flirtatious attitude which makes her grin even more.

“Ah, what a shame,” she sings out, closing her locker with a loud thud as she collects her handbag. “And who's this?”

“Y/N, our new colleague.” Yoongi answers before you can even open your mouth, and somehow, you're grateful for that.

Maybe it's the way she eyes you, wiggling her brow at Yoongi which you don't miss. She's not an introvert, for sure.

“Oh, nice to meet you. I'm Mishil but you can call me Misha.” she smiles, showing you a set of her white teeth in confident and cheerful smile.

You notice the dimple in her cheek and her sharp eyeliner, wondering if you might possibly look this good after the whole shift. She's beautiful, her strawberry blonde complimenting her soft skin and even though you can't see her mascara slightly smudged under her eyes, she can still pull it off.

“It's nice meeting you.” you smile at her.

“As much as I'd love to talk to you guys, I gotta go. The whole night shift was a nightmare,” she complains, rolling her eyes in exhaustion as she makes her way to the door. “Bye, bye!” she sings out, not waiting for the two of you to react, identical to the way Namjoon did it.

“...and she's gone.” Yoongi mutters, chuckling when he sees your widened eyes.

“She's... quite something.” you comment with a similar mutter.

“Yeah, you'll get used to her, it just takes some time.” he waves off his hand, assuring you.

“She's flirty.” you voice out your thoughts, causing him to chuckle once again.

You're not sure whether you said something funny, but once he opens his mouth it causes your mouth to drop open.

“She's married.” he tells you, laughing when he sees your opened mouth and bulged out eyes.

You're mesmerized by his smile, it instantly catches your attention as the way he shows his gums and his eyes crinkle in the ends. No, no, stop! This is your colleague, you remind yourself.

Gulping, you find words to ripple out of your throat. “Her husband doesn't mind it?”

“Wife,” Yoongi says, “She has a wife.”

“Oh,” you let out, “Doesn't her wife mind it?” you ask again, chuckling at your correction as he shrugs in response.

“I think she's used to her personality,”

You're not sure if you 'd liked it if your partner would flirt with other people, most likely not.

“Love works in a weird way.” he shrugs, opening one of the drawers besides the lockers as he pulls out the same blue scrubs as the ones he's wearing.

You thank him once he hands it to you, smiling lightly. “The size should be right, if not just pull out the correct one. I'll leave you to it, I'll be waiting outside.”

“Waiting?” you ask in confusion, watching him walking towards the door.

“It looks like your first shift is with me.” he smirks, opening the door as he leaves without any other word.

You stand there for a few minutes, surprised how fast your heart beats just from the single exchange of a few words and looks. This hasn't happened for a long time, it feels almost new and never experienced. Unfortunately, you've felt this way before and it brings nothing but sadness and anger.

Looking at the fresh clothes in your hands, your smile spreads into a wide grin before you even realize.

He got the right size.

“I'm scared,” The little boy murmurs, staring with wide eyes at the needle in your hand.

His eyes averts to his mother who's standing just a few meters behind you, giving you the space to work, while her son stares at her in a hope she'll take him away before the needle can even go through his skin.

“You don't have to be,” you tell him, eyes filled with sympathy as his bottom lip trembles. “It's probably going to be a little bit uncomfortable, but you're a big guy. I'm sure you can handle it.”

You search his eyes in question, which dance between the needle in your hand and your eyes. He thinks it through, wondering what his response will be before he inhales shakily.

“I'm a big guy.” he assures you, straightening himself to prove his point.

It makes you smile, looking over your shoulder to call his mother to hold his hand. Stitches aren't comfortable, he's lucky enough to end up with only two of them instead of more. He cries out as soon as you pierce the needle through the skin of his forehead, trying to work fast but precise. It breaks your heart, even though you're helping him by sewing his wound. He whines and cries, even when you're done and he looks almost mad.

“We're done, you did so good!” you cheer him up, ruffling his curly hair as he looks up at you with a mere glare but you don't take it personally. “Now you know it's better if you listen to your mom not to run on stairs.”

His mother chuckles, ruffling his hair the same way you did as she praises him for holding still. You fish out a lollipop which you hid into the pocket of your scrubs as soon as you've heard about an emergency with a kid and bleeding forehead. Candy always helps and you just happen to carry them in your bags ever since Em was little.

The boy's eyes shine as soon as he sees the lollipop in your hands, reaching for it almost immediately as he takes it from you.

“What do you say?” His mother chimes in, caressing the dark skin of his soft skin as he mumbles a cute 'thank you'. “Thank you so much.” she turns to you, a gratitude shining in her eyes as you give her a smile in return.

When they both leave, it's just you and Yoongi in the room, who made sure you're doing your job right. Instead of breathing down your neck, he started to sanitize equipment as soon as you started to take care of the poor boy.

It's your first day working as a nurse and thanks to your colleague, it's not as stressful as you thought it would be. He seems to be very chill and laid back, yet precise and skilled. You're glad he's the one training you.

“You're good with kids.” he comments, putting the disinfection back on its place, glancing at you.

“Yeah, I have a--”

“Hey, slackers. We need you here.” Namjoon walks into the room, rushing the two of you out of it before you can even response to Yoongi.

Sighing, you both follow Namjoon who keeps telling you to hurry.

Yeah, Yoongi is definitely much more chill than Namjoon is.

Two months in and you think everyone hates you.

Maybe it's just the sixth sense inside of you, or you're completely overthinking everyone's reaction. You wouldn't expect them to understand, nor you're shocked by the glares you receive on daily basis. In other situations, you wouldn't care about it that much, even though it's uncomfortable and some part of you feels bad. But what really bothers you is none other than your colleague, one of the first people you've met on your first day and was kind enough to show you around.

From what started as a great relationship between two colleagues, turned into brief greeting where he wouldn't even meet your eyes. It affects you more than you'd like to admit, especially when you started to cook more food, just to pack it and bring it to him during your shifts together. Those sandwiches from the vending machine are unhealthy, and just as Yoongi said, there's nothing which compares to the home-cooked meal.

It became a routine, you packing him a soup and meal every time you both had shift, no matter how many times he told you, you shouldn't bother. Everything went well, after you had to run home whenever you got a call from the babysitter or school, which led to someone else taking all of your shifts.

It ended up with almost every colleague glaring at you, for not coming into the hospital and not doing your job. Little did you know, it was mostly Yoongi who ended up taking most of your shifts causing him to sport a dark bags underneath his eyes.

If you haven't been through so much, you would probably cry somewhere in the corner at the thought of everyone hating you. But you don't. However, one particular person bothers your mind more often than it should. Deciding you're over with the cold shoulder he's been giving you, you ignore everyone's stares once you walk into the break room. The chatter quiets down as soon as they notice you. Without doubt, they were talking about you behind your back but you could care less about that.

Although, one pair of particular set of eyes catches your attention in the corner of the room, munching on that distasteful sandwich. If he weren't so stubborn, declining your lunch and attempt of feeding him with a home-cooked meal, he could have eat much better food now. It was just another sign of Yoongi's friendship fading away.

Their lunch break ends as most of them just go back to work, making you stare at the floor with a frown settled on your face. Do they hate you so much?

As if Namjoon could hear your thoughts, you met his soft smile but he doesn't say anything as he walks away. You watch Yoongi tossing the plastic package into the bin as he starts to clean the mess on the table, completely ignoring you.

With a sigh, you walk up to him feeling almost awkward that you're practically standing right next to him and he doesn't even spare you a glance. Once he's done he turns around but you don't allow him to walk away, standing right in front of him with a raised brow.

“Can we talk?” you ask softly, praying he's just going to drop this act full of ignorance.

When his eyes meet yours, for the first time in weeks from such a close proximity, you hate how fast your heart starts to hummer against your ribcage. Those dark orbs glaring at you seems to soften at the pleading look you give him, and you feel some kind of weird hope before he shutters it in a second.

“I gotta work.” he murmurs, shoulder slightly bumping into yours as he tries to make a way towards the door.

You don't move, watching his back as he leaves out of the room, with a pain in your chest.

You're done.

You're done sitting around, trying to catch Yoongi's attention who somehow always manages to avoid you before you can even open your mouth.

When you see him walking through the hallway, completely oblivious to your focused gaze, staring at him as if he was your prey, you won't let him get away. Not anymore. Before he can react, or even properly meet your eyes, you're pulling him into the room which happens to be janitor's closet. It's small, but it'll do.

His stutters of confusion are ignored, as you flick the light open and stare at him.

“What the hell?” he asks, confused that you just grabbed him and pulled him into the janitor's closet.

“We need to talk.” you tell him with a persistent tone, brows furrowed in concentration.

“What? Now? You can't just pull me here--” he looks around, glancing around before he continues. “I've a lot of work to do.”

It's just another attempt of avoiding you, which makes you want to loose your mind by this man. Before he can reach towards the door, dangerously stepping closer to you, your mind works on its own and you lock it. The doorknob digs into your lower back but you don't care, you're just trying to make him stay and talk. With your back pressed against the door, he looks at you in confusion before he sighs. It's clear he has no intentions talking to you, simply staring at you with a raised brow. The same look of ignorance he's been giving you for weeks.

“What's your problem? Why are you so distant and avoiding me all of a sudden?”

He chuckles bitterly, shaking his head at you before he looks down with a cold glare. “My problem? My problem is that I've been covering your shifts, saving your ass every time you haven't had the decency to come to work and do your actual job.”

Okay, you didn't expect him to be so vocal and straight forward. His tone is cold and bitter, surprising you which is evident on your face before you frown in hurt.

“No,” he deadpans, “don't look at me like that. I'm not a bad guy in this. I'm fucking exhausted, overworking myself because of--” he stops himself, and you almost push him to finish his sentence but you just dryly gulp.

“My daughter kept getting sick, and I had to be at home with her, there's nothing I could do. Her babysitter wouldn't look after her if she's sick and she couldn't go to kindergarten either. And you know what? If I got a call from her babysitter or her kindergarten saying she's sick again, I'll drop everything and go and take care of my daughter. So hate me all you want, but I'm a mother before I'm a nurse.”

The frustration has been built inside of you for so long, that you finally snap at the one person who made your shifts always more fun and bright. He seems to be caught off guard by the new information, slowly processing it as he widens his eyes.

“You've a daughter?” he breathes out.

“Yes.” you hold yourself back from exclaiming loudly.

“You've never told me that.” he murmurs, almost expression of hurt crossing his soft features.

It's not like you kept Em as a secret, but before you could talk about your private life in more depth and how her father cowardly left you before she was even born, you barely got enough time to go back to work and talk to him. You're surprised you haven't got fired yet. You can't get fired, you've got a family you need to support and Em relies on you.

“I was going to.” you admit, looking down at your feet with a puzzled look.

Who knows what would've happened if you just told him sooner. Would he be more acceptable? Isn't he saying it right now because he's trying to put a blame on you?

You almost jump when he cups your face, holding up your head so he can stare right into your eyes with the same look you've. They're filled with apology that spark in his dark orbs, slowly caressing your cheek.

“I'm sorry,” he whispers, “I'm sorry for being so hard on you. I thought you just don't care about this job, or us.” he admits shamefully.

“It's okay.” you assure him with a soft voice, but he shakes his head in response.

“I was an asshole to you, I'm so sorry,” he says right back, still holding your face as his eyes drops down to your lips, eyeing your face. “I really want to kiss you.”

Your heart jumps, not that uncomfortable way whenever he would straight avoid you or glare at you. It's different this time and you react almost immediately.

“Then kiss me.”

Expect him to do it slow, he surprises you with his lips right on your own, not wasting a second as he starts kissing you. He deepens it, a touch of his lips full of emotions and regret and it's almost unbelievable how you can feel it just from the single kiss. Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling him closer as he hungrily kisses you, too stubborn to pull away for some oxygen. It's needy and you moan into his lips when he squeezes your ass in his palms. But you still need to pull away, lips attaching from one another but your foreheads stay leaned against each other as you both breathe heavily.

“Let me take you out.” he whispers, thumb tracing your cheekbone as he admires your make-up free face.

“A date?” you sound surprised, wondering if you've heard him right.

Is it too soon to jump with joy?

“Of course, I've been meaning to ask you since that time I saw you with that little boy, stitching him up.” he admits, causing you to giggle in shock.

“Really?”

He delivers a soft peck onto your nose, biting into his lower lip. “Uhm, you're an amazing woman. I wanna get to know you, and your daughter.”

He seems to be nervous, patiently waiting for your response but he doesn't move away from you, still wrapped in your embrace even though your frame is smaller.

He's the first man who doesn't run away knowing you've a daughter, but not just that. Yoongi is the first man who managed to make your heart flutter with the simplest acts. It's too soon to talk about him fixing your broken heart or him being the love of your life, but time with him seems nice. The thought of spending it outside of the hospital, trying to get to know him as something more makes you want to yell in excitement.

For now, you hold back your happiness and smile at him.

“I'd be more than happy to get to know you as well.” you admit, enough for him to envelope you even in a tighter hug that makes you squeak in surprise again, but you squeeze him back.

“Stop it,” you chuckle, sitting up from your bed as you watch your boyfriend trying to find his clothes that are scattered all around your room.

You thought sex would help him relax and it did, for twenty minutes that you were sucking him off and then bouncing on his cock. But now that you both reached your high, he's back to his quiet self with tensed muscles. As much as he tries to hide his nervousness and fear, he's doing an awful job with it and it's nothing than amusing to you.

“You're about to meet a four year old, not a monster that's gonna eat your head.” you joke, meeting his glare in response silently telling you he's not in the mood for joking.

“What if she doesn't like me?” he asks, setting on the edge of your bed completely naked, forgetting to find his clothes.

“She will. I told her about you so much, she's excited to meet you.” you assure him, slowly crawling to him as you hug him closer to you.

Both of your bodies are coated with sweat, and you could use a shower, but you can't let this go. He's been tensed from the moment you made plans on introducing Em to him. Of course, he wants to meet her. He was the one who kept being persistent, asking about her all the time and show him the pictures of her on your phone. The truth is, you were waiting for him to naturally set what's the right time to meet your daughter. You've been dating for the past two months, barely making any plans outside of the hospital since you've a child at home.

Your babysitter, which happens to be your neighbor, was kind enough to look after her in late nights while you went on a couple of dates with Yoongi. It's been tearing your heart apart knowing you've your little girl at home, but you still wanted to spend some time with Yoongi. It feels like the right time for them to meet.

“Now come on, let's shower before we have to pick her up,” you nudge him, kissing his cheek before you stand up. “If we're quick enough, we might have a round two.” you suggest, causing him to stand up abruptly, ushering you into your bathroom while you both start to laugh at his eagerness.  

When it's the right time to pick up your daughter, Yoongi decides to stay in the car while he tries to occupy himself by playing some games on his phone. His knee bounces even when you open the door to put Em into her car seat. She notices the stranger in your car right away, her words slowly fading away as she went off about her day.

Yoongi slowly turns around, his scared eyes meeting hers as he tries his best to muster a proper smile. You've never seen him being so nervous. This must be more important to him than it's to you. You know Em is going to love him, that's why you're not worried about it too much.

“Em, this is Yoongi. You remember him? I was telling you about him.” you tell her, putting on her seat belt as she slowly nods.

“Yoongs?” she asks, her eyes looking up at you as you nod with a smile.

When you make sure everything is secured, you go and sit in the driver's seat while Yoongi looks at you. “Yoongs?” he asks confusingly.

“Yeah, she made you a nickname.” you shrug, causing him to slowly nod and for the first time, you see one honest smile lightening up his face.

“Hey, Em, I brought you something.” Yoongi says, gaining her attention right away which causes him to chuckle.

“You did?” she asks, her eyes widening as he pulls out a pony plushie, the very one she has been begging you to buy her for a few weeks now. “Pony! Yes!” she starts to bounce in her car seat, already reaching for the toy that Yoongi gladly gives her.

“What do you say, Em?” you speak up, your eyes solely on the road, although you wish you could see their exchange better.

“Thank you, Yoongs! I love you!” she almost yells, the both of you erupting in laughter as your four year old daughter keeps happily squealing for the rest of the ride.

“See? She loves you.” you tell him quietly, a huge smile stretching on your lips as Yoongi joins you, looking back at Em to admire her and her happiness.

“So, he's just your friend, right?”

You hide your smile, slowly cutting the vegetable as you hear Em letting out a frustrated sigh.

“Yes, dad!” she whines for the hundredth time, your heart tingling at the sound of the name leaving her mouth.

It's been almost a year since Yoongi officially adopted her and became her father, filled that empty spot that her heart was craving for. She wanted to have a father for so long and now she has to put up with overprotective Yoongi almost every day.

“Okay, okay. I'll be here while the two of you play.” he reminds her, causing her to groan but she doesn't say anything in response, coloring her drawings in silence.

Yoongi walks up to you, hugging you from the back while his chin is propped on your shoulder.

“She's seven years old. Don't you think it's too soon to worry about her dating life?” you tease him, giggling when he slightly bites onto your shoulder.

“I don't want someone to break her small heart. Have you seen those heart eyes whenever she talks about him? That is not just friend.” he informs you, causing you to laugh at him as he groans in annoyance at you.

You put all the vegetables into the pot and turns the stove on, as you turn to him. He takes your hand, twisting the wedding ring in his hold as he smiles down at it.

“I love you.” he tells you, your heart warming once again as if it's the first time he said it.

“I love you.” you tell him, kissing him on his small and plump lips.

You turn around, glancing at your daughter that stares at you with disgust on her face.

“See? You don't have to worry about her dating anytime soon.” you point out, causing him to roll his eyes at you before he's kissing you again, this time accompanied with your daughter's fake coughing in the background.

Indeed, love works in a weird way.

[moony-meadow]

The Very Hungry Beelzebub (5)

Previous Part

As Mammon carried me to the bathroom attached to my room with Beel following closely behind, I became distinctly aware of the fact that I had not yet been returned to my normal size. Typically, I would have been pitching a fit and insisting the demons grow me back immediately. But strangely, for the moment, I found myself not really minding.

Despite the fact that I had just been shrunken and eaten by a demon against my will, I actually felt weirdly safe in the hands of Mammon and Beelzebub. I didn’t know how to describe it, because usually when I was so small, I felt completely vulnerable and defenseless. However, for whatever reason, those feelings weren’t currently prominent. Of course, the instinctual fear was still there, but it was more like background noise than anything.

And so I would allow Mammon and Beel to keep me miniature sized for a little while longer. Having them tote me around and take care of me didn’t sound all that bad. After all, I hadn’t been properly fussed over since shortly after the brothers all found out I was a descendant of Lilith.

Unlike Asmodeus’s personal bathroom, mine was much smaller and a fair bit less opulent. There was a porcelain clawfoot tub against the back wall, a long counter which contained the sink was situated against the wall to the left of the entrance door, and sectioned off out of sight of the door was the toilet. The countertop was dotted with a few of my personal care items such as face wash, lotion, and a hair brush, but otherwise the room was well ordered thanks to the cleaning demons that occasionally popped in.

“First things first, we gotta get the smell of Beel off of ya,” Mammon stated once the three of us had entered the bathroom. “The only demon you should smell like is the Great Mammon.”

I wasn’t sure whether to scoff or to laugh. Mammon really was intent on the whole “me being his” thing. Admittedly, I found it a little bit charming in a weird way. However, the idea that I should smell like him was taking it in a weird direction. “I’d prefer to smell like myself, thank you,” I replied simply.

“You’re pretty bad at hiding your crush on Y/N,” Beel observed casually, instantly earning him a scowl from his older brother. I smacked a hand over my mouth to prevent myself from audibly chuckling.

“Oi, I do not have a crush on a crummy human!” Mammon insisted, all while clutching me close to his chest. “Y-you’re just makin’ stuff up, Beel.”

I slapped the back of my hand against Mammon’s torso. “Enough bickering,” I ordered, craning my neck to look up at his face.

Aside from a little bit of under the breath grumbling, Mammon did as I asked and he and Beel went about figuring out how to get me cleaned up. The next thing I knew, I was laying on my back on Mammon’s palm, my head hanging over the edge. I was positioned a few inches from the warm stream of water that was spilling from the golden sink faucet. Beel’s hands hovered nearby. One glance at the redhead’s face revealed how concentrated he was on being ready to spring to my aid should I need it.

“Just sit back and relax, we’ll get the spit outta your hair in no time,” Mammon declared cheerfully.

I gave a shrug and let my eyes slide shut. This whole situation was strange and unnecessary, considering Beel and Mammon could just grow me back and I could very easily take a shower, but I was willing to roll with it anyways. If I imagined it as a giant spa experience, it was actually pretty appealing.

A moment later, Mammon had inched his hand forward until my hair was caught in the gentle cascade of water. I immediately let out a relaxed sigh once the warmth made contact with the skin of my scalp. I stayed just like that for a couple minutes, until I felt two giant fingers touch my head. Initially, I tensed up. But when I peeked a look and saw Beel carefully rubbing shampoo into my hair, I returned to my former state of calm.

“Y’know, I could get used to this,” I remarked as Beel continued to gently massage my scalp.

Mammon’s hand jolted slightly under me. “Hey, don’t think this is a normal thing. The only reason a demon as noble and important as me is botherin’ to help clean a human up, is ‘cause my dumb brother went and ate ya,” He stated firmly.

“Don’t you think that’s the pot calling the kettle black?” Beel questioned in his usual calm tone.

I opened up one eye just in time to see Mammon shoot a sour look at his younger brother. Beel didn’t even seem to notice, his focus was entirely on the task of washing out my hair.

After about ten minutes, Mammon and Beel were apparently satisfied that my hair had been cleared of demon slobber. I had been set down on the counter and stood a few inches from the sink, rubbing a cloth the size of a comforter over my damp locks.

Mammon was sitting on his knees, his arms folded over the edge of the counter with his head resting on top of them. “I wish we could keep ya like this,” he said, a dreamy look in his eyes as he watched me.

Glowering up at the giant demon’s face, I shook my head in disapproval. “You just want to eat me again,” I accused.

Unphased by my accusation, Mammon gave a small shrug. He reached out with one of his ringed fingers and ran it along the length of my arm. “Well yeah, that’s a given. But like this, you’re also so cu--” the Avatar of Greed cut himself off, hastily retracting his finger as if I’d burned him.

“You were going to say Y/N is cute,” Beel helpfully supplied, earning him a mortified look from Mammon. “I’d have to agree,” he continued. A rush of heat instantly attacked my cheeks. I looked down at my feet in an attempt to prevent either brother from seeing my involuntary blush. “Although, they are at least a little bit safer at their normal size,” Beel reminded Mammon.

I definitely felt safer at my natural height, but then again, if every demon could just effortlessly shrink me, then I was realistically always potentially a small step away from danger... “Let’s not dwell on that little technicality right now,” I told myself. After the rollercoaster of emotions I’d gone through in just a couple hours, I felt I deserved a break from fretting.

“Speaking of which,” I started, dropping the washcloth. “As much as I enjoyed you two waiting on me, I think it’s about time you grow me back.” While my head felt nice and clean now, the rest of my body was still caked in dried saliva. I was in need of a proper shower; and of course my pajamas would need a thorough washing, that is, if I didn’t end up just throwing them out altogether.

Mammon turned his attention back to me, now sporting a pouty face. “Can’t I eat ya? You’re already small and all.”

I narrowed my eyes at the white-haired demon. “Do you really want to eat me when I’ve got Beel’s spit all over my body?” I questioned, arms folded over my chest.

A look of disgust immediately formed on Mammon’s face, eliciting a chuckle from Beel. “Uck, no. I’ll wait for another time,” he grumbled as he pulled away from the counter and got to his feet.

“No one is supposed to be eating Y/N,” Beelzebub scolded. “Lucifer would kill both of us if he found out we’d done it, even if they did make it out okay.”

While the Avatar of Pride had gotten a lot less...aggressive towards me over time, it was still impossible not to be intimidated by him. I knew my status as an exchange student protected me from Lucifer’s wrath for the most part, but I still worried about how he punished his brothers. Yes, they were powerful demons capable of withstanding much more than any human could, but that didn’t mean I liked seeing them get hurt.

Rather than dismissing Beel’s words as I had expected, Mammon gave his brother a hard look. “Ya better not breathe a word of this to him, I don’t care how guilty your conscience is,” he warned.

My eyebrows shot up. It was so strange seeing him act so stern. At first, I felt the urge to scold him for being so harsh with Beel, but then I realized the reason for the warning. If Beel let it slip to Lucifer what he’d done, his punishment would no doubt be severe. Mammon was actually looking out for his little brother, and that was something I found endlessly endearing.

Beel frowned but nodded in understanding nonetheless. When he glanced in my direction, I shot him a reassuring smile, which he was quick to reciprocate. I felt the sudden urge to hug both him and Mammon, but that was something I wouldn’t be able to do properly until I was back to my usual size.

“Okay, enough stalling. One of you two needs to grow me back now,” I proclaimed.

“Only the demon who shrinks ya can grow ya back, so it’s gotta be Beel,” Mammon said, sounding none too happy about that fact. I had no doubt he wanted to be the one to come to my rescue once again.

Beel’s hands began to move slowly towards me. “Do you mind if I pick you up so I can put you on the floor?” he asked kindly, his vibrant eyes watching me as he awaited my response.

Oh yeah. It probably wouldn’t be good if I was returned to my normal size while still on the bathroom counter, my head would probably end up colliding with the ceiling. I gave Beel my nod of approval and braced myself as his massive hands gently scooped me up and transferred me to the floor.

Once I was back on solid ground, I took a moment to look up and take in the view of two mind bogglingly huge demons towering on either side of me. Talk about intimidating. That was certainly a sight to make me all the more eager to get big again.

“Okay, ready and…” Beel’s words preceded the intense tingling sensation that signalled to me the resizing process had begun. In a matter of moments I was myself again. Of course both Beel and Mammon were still taller than me, but at least I could look them in the eyes without getting a crick in my neck.

I didn’t hesitate long before tugging both brothers into an awkward three person hug. Mammon gave an indignant yelp, and a glance upwards revealed that Beel’s face was tinged red. That only made my grin widen and my grip on the two demons tighten.

It was hard to believe I was embracing two people who had both eaten me.

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 19: Shadow - Shadow Of Myself

Danny’s gotten himself hurt, but not to worry Valerie’s here. Now if only that stupid ghost Phantom wasn’t tagging along for the ride.

Valerie shifts her blaster in her arms, the metal creaking slightly, not sure what to do with the situation in front of her. Danny, human Danny, her friend and once love; was lying prone on the ground unconscious. And Phantom, that damn ghost ‘Danny’, archenemy and destroyer of lives; was practically cradling his torso and head, staring at her with a guarded ‘will you hurt me or help him’ look.

Valerie swallows, clicks her visor open and squints at him, but seeing the blood pooling on the ground makes her decision for her. Immediately dropping the weapon and rushing to kneel at Danny’s side. Snapping at Phantom and banking more than a little on him maintaining that ‘superhero’ facade he insisted on, “what happened”.

“Guys In White”.

That catches her off guard, “what?!?”, as she starts pulling out first aid while Phantom phases Danny’s sweater off. She doesn’t care or know why he burns it to ash. At least his freaky powers were useful for something, getting the top off with far less jarring than any human could manage. Him getting his damn shedding ecto-energy or whatever in Danny’s wound, or wounds, seriously doesn’t impress her though.

Phantom grumbles incoherently as he works practically seamlessly with her, using his intangibility to hold the skin over the large bullet hole apparently there closed without getting in her way of cleaning and sanitising. Using an ecto-flame to sanitise the needle to speed the process up. He does give her an actual answer though, probably trying to be a ‘distraction’, “they put a few things together”.

Valerie pushes the needle through and tries to ignore that she’s doing this to Danny’s body not hers, “put together what, Phantom”.

“Things”.

She makes her scowl very audible but doesn’t look away from her task. That’s enough to prompt him to explain further, good, “it’s not entirely my secret to tell, Val-”.

“Don’t call me that”.

She can hear the eye-roll in his voice, “Red. It’s his secret”.

Valerie scoffs, though keeps her hands working smoothly, pointedly ignoring the bits of blood getting smeared around, “like you have any problem spilling people's secrets”.

“That was to stop you from a suicide mission. Telling you his stuff won’t save his life”.

Fine. She’ll give him that one. That thing genuinely could have killed her. And Danny, this was bad but it wasn’t going to die here and now bad. If he was left alone then yes, he would... probably bleed out. And the only reason she was here was her scanner picking up on Phantom. Swallowing a little, “whatever. I would have been fine. But this whatever got him hurt. Even I know the G.I.W. don’t mess around and are extremists-”.

Phantom cuts her off, “coming from you that says a lot”. She pauses to glare at him very quickly before finishing up the stitching, “so we both know they absolutely would kill someone”. He doesn’t say anything as they move to sit Danny up, though his face ‘appears’ to be one of concerned concentration. Not that the ghost actually felt concern, it was just part of his stupid act. “Hold him”, he just nods as she moves to start wrapping Danny up. She’ll get the boy more genuine bandaging from her room, but he needs to be at least somewhat bandaged to get him there without risk. And as much as she’d like to get him the Hell away from the ghost, she’s not going to rush and risk his health just to do that.

Phantom sighs slightly after a while, “you do have a point”. Valerie huffs, at least he was willing to admit that. Snipping the bandaging and grabbing him under the armpits to move him onto her board after summoning it out.

Her actively scowling as Phantom floats up with her, even following after. Her snapping after a bit, “you’re like a damn shadow. I can’t shake you. Go away, ghost”.

Phantom giving a weirdly firm, “no”, immediately; which she glances at him for. The Zone was Phantom’s problem? Even with him insisting on his stupid false persona, he didn’t actively go out of his way to make sure people were fine outside of taking them to a hospital. She was perfectly capable of looking after Danny herself. Hell, she probably had better experience with anything ecto-related than the hospital did. “I don’t need your damn help, Phantom. And neither does he”.

Phantom scowls and rolls his eyes a little, “I know you won’t make him worse. You get along and won’t try sticking him in some anti-ecto bath or purifier dream catcher contraption like Jack and Maddie would”. Valerie has to blink those images out of her head, that was messed up and definitely something the  Fenton’s would do but she’s not about to let the Spook distract her, “then get lost. The only reason I’m not shooting you now is to avoid jostling him. That’s it. So go away, or else”.

Groaning over the stupid stubborn ghosts, “no”, as she flys through her bedroom window. Quickly moving to lay him out on her bed and immediately summoning out a small pistol, pointing it at the ghost, “give me one damn reason I shouldn’t pump you full of holes. I told you to get lost. I’ll be nice and let you leave, if you leave right now, for helping but seriously. Get”.  

Phantom stares at her for a bit, blinking once, “I... can’t”. Which fine, is enough to get her to pause.

Squinting at him, at him glancing from her to Danny and back. “And why the Hell not”. No point framing that accusation as a question.

The Spook squints at her right back, ghostly tail swishing in the air, “hinting at that answer is what the G.I.W. shot him over”. Now that’s enough to make her lower her weapon slightly. Only a little though.

Blinking and glaring at him, “so you really think I’d shoot him”. She almost feels insulted by that implication. Not to mention him still playing the stupid hero thing. ‘Protecting’ Danny.

He glances from her to Danny and back again for the second time, “that depends”.

Okay now she definitely is offended. Scowling meanly, “on?”. Did he have to be so stupidly elusive about everything and how dare he even claim she’d hurt Danny of all people.

“On how badly you want to ‘obliterate me out of existence’ versus ‘not get Danny hurt as collateral of your hunting’”, shrugging with obviously fake looseness, “or more specifically as collateral for your weirdly obsessive hatred for me”.

Her snapping, “it’s not obsessive when you destroyed my life, the town, and play this stupid hero crap to screw with the town and amass all your stupid ‘fans’”.

“That honestly sounds more like Ember than me”.

“Phantom”. Her pointing the pistol at him more genuinely again gets him to put up his hands in a surrendering motion, “hey hey now”.

“Well then start talking you damn ghost”, scowling a little at the raised eyebrow, “of course I care more about Danny than seeing you wiped off the face of this earth. Fucking duh, Phantom. Now explain”.

He stares like he’s judging her worth or some crap, like he’s anyone to judge that. “Have you ever compared us?”, adding when she just squints at him, “me and Danny, that is”.

She rolls her eyes though not taking her eyes off him, “why the Zone would I. And no, you having the same first name isn’t a reason to”.

Phantom scowls, “it was to them”.

She growls at him because this is getting annoying and she has a human Danny to look after, “stop beating around the damn bush and just spit it out already”. Him snapping right back at her, “because you won’t believe me”.

“Then why the fuck would the G.I.W. believe whatever!”.

“Because they don’t give a shit about him. Ancients, they tried to off a kid for having the same hair colour as me. Our similarities are way more suspicious!”.

Valerie smirks a little to herself at him looking like he hadn’t mean to say all that and seeming sheepish. Then frowning, “I don’t see a single damn similarity”.

“Personal bias due to personal relation. You don’t want to see the ghost you hate in the human you like, or the other way around. So you don’t. Same with the rest of the town. The G.I.W. aren’t blinded by that kind of bias”, him shrugging, “that’s what Jazz says anyway”.

That’s yet another thing that makes her pause and lower her weapon slightly, “you're... friendly with her”. What the Hell was that girl thinking?!? Dash or Paulina or even Sam she’d understand, but Jazz was a Fenton and freakishly smart.

“She knows things, yes. Figured it out on her own”, he sighs rubbing his eyes in obvious annoyance, “your suit has something that can tell a persons body measurements, right? Just use that”.

Valerie scowls, “I don’t take orders from you”, but does pop out the scanner while the ghost's tail solidifies into legs again and he plants himself on her floor dutifully. She scowls at him more for that. The nerve and ego, just entering a hunters home like that. At least this might make aiming at him easier, and locking onto him.

Turning the scanner on Danny though never taking her eyes off Phantom. Well until she pulls the scanner back over and glances at it. The thing read as reading the same body/person, the Hell? Scanning again, because was this thing malfunctioning. Audibly growling when the ghost chuckles at her. Stupid ghost found this funny. The results are the exact same. They had the exact same body shape, even hair shape. What the fuck. “Your bodies are the same”, he nods but frowns when she starts scowling at him, “what? Did you mould yourself after him or-”, scowl feeling and becoming genuinely angry, taking a step towards him, “are you Obsessed with him”, he immediately floats up waving his hands back and forth as she locks her pistol in on him, “that would explain why you constantly are ‘doing the job of a hunter’ and like puns so damn much! You just want to be near your fucking Obsession!”. Him successfully phasing through her floor to avoid the shot she fired off.

Him sticking his head over the window, at least the bastard was outside again, “what! No! That’s not it!”.

“Fucking bullshit!”, she immediately shoots at him again, “I’ve got no reason to believe a goddamn ghost!”.

“This is exactly what I was talking about!”, him phasing through the wall looking genuinely ticked off, “it doesn’t matter what I say or proof I give! You’re not going to believe me!”, and takes out her pistol with a small rock.

Her throwing the small crappy desk at him, all her furniture got an anti-ecto coating nowadays, “you’re a ghost!”.

He smashes the desk apart, “and you’re impossible!”.

Both of them jerking to a stop at a groan from the bed, snapping their heads over and both sighing when he doesn’t actually wake up. But it does knock a little sense into both of them. Valerie pinching the bridge of her nose and breathing. Looking back to Phantom, “get out. I don’t care what weird freaky ghost thing you’ve got for him. Leave. You don’t need to ‘protect’ him or whatever bullshit because I sure as shit ain’t harming him and I even more sure as shit ain’t going to let those G.I.W. asses anywhere near him. So get gone. Seriously. Fuck off”.

“Once again, I can’t”.

“Oh for fucks sake”. Scowling because she so doesn’t have time for this fucking bullshit, at least not until Danny is properly patched up. Moving as fast as she can and actually managing to catch the Spook by surprise with a hooked rope-like energy blast, pinning him to the wall and blocking out his powers. “Then just stay the fuck there and shut up. I don’t want to hear your crap”. Phantom rolls his eyes but thankfully doesn’t say shit, looks incredibly annoyed though; but what does she care. Instead focusing on getting the good bandaging and getting to work.

What does get her caught off guard again was that Danny’s wound didn’t look even slightly healed. Not a scab or nothing. She frowns, “why the Hell isn't he healing”, when she doesn’t get a response she looks to Phantom and scowls, “for the love of everything you pain in my ass. You can speak. Fuck I hate you. Happy?”.

Phantom smirks for a second, “yes. Very”, before frowning, “he’s not going to. Not like this anyway”.

Valerie grimaces at that, what the Hell did those men do to him? “Why?”.

Phantom opens and closes his mouth a couple times before watching her a little, “have you ever noticed that he doesn’t really seem... to heal like a normal person”.

Valerie rolls her eyes, everyone knew about Danny’s contamination problem and all the weird stupid complications of it. Like the clumsiness and just knowing when a ghost was about to show up. Then frowning a little, “so this has to do with his contamination”, that... that might be a problem. Danny’s contamination was unique even in the opinions of his parents. She barely knew the first thing in how to deal with that. No one did. Well, except Danny... and apparently his fucking ghost stalker.

Phantom sighs and looks around a little before looking to her face again, “he’s not contaminated. The ‘contamination’ is weird because he’s not ‘contaminated’”.

Valerie can’t help snapping at that, “then what the Hell is it and why do you know about it?!?”. Which he scowls at her over, “fucking complicated that’s what”, then shaking his head and seemingly calm in himself. Not that he should even be able to actually experience anger. “Ancients, do you have to be so difficult?”, sighing and mumbling something she doesn’t catch seemingly to himself before talking to her again, “I’m the ‘it’”.

“The fuck does that mean. The Hell did you do to him”, if she didn’t have him pinned she absolutely would be pulling another gun on him, she was tempted to as it was.

Phantom leans his head back, banging it on the wall, “ugh! Would you stop blaming me for everything?”.

Her snarking, “then stop being at fault”. He does chuckle a little at that but gives a weirdly hallow, “I hardly ever am”, and rights his head before she can comment on that, “okay look. Obviously not all us ghosties are the same, work the same-”.

She cuts him off, “a ghost’s still a ghost. Get to the point”.

He snaps at her a bit, “I’m bloody well tryin’, Ancients”. She waves for him to go on, effectively saying she maybe might not interrupt him. So long as he doesn’t say anything stupid. Which he will. He rolls his yes at her, “so as I was saying, we don’t all work the same. Surprise surprise, I’m a rare one”. Valerie muttering mostly to herself, “no fucking shit”, which he hears and chuckles at. Though she feels slightly more interested in this because no one had a damn clue why Phantom was fucking weird and this kinda sounded like she was about to find out. Though... apparently Danny was involved somehow. Which, she decidedly does not have a good feeling about.

“I’m what’s known as a Shadow, also called a half shade though. Only three of us exist”. Valerie actually whistles at that because damn. “Shade’s are what happen when the ghost's body was cremated or otherwise destroyed before they formed. Shade’s are... impressions rather than a whole”.

Okay that she has to butt in on, “but all ghosts are just ecto-impressions”.

Phantom looks at her like she’s stupid, “I thought you of all people wouldn’t believe that horse crap. If that were true born ghosts would be impossible, for one. For two, how the fuck would you get an emotional ectoplasmic impression of every fucking plant in the universe into one being? Or the time stream?”.

“There’s a time stream ghost”.

He rolls his eyes, “yes, but irrelevant. Basically none of Amity’s ghosts are Shade’s aka impressions. They are souls. Someone’s spirit. You know, that used to be in their body? Cremation and shit kinda wrecks the soul so you get an impression instead. Anyway-”. Valerie’s pretty sure he doesn’t realise how crazy and horrifying that is if it’s actually true. And sure there were plenty of people around Amity who tried to pitch the ‘ghosts are souls’ thing but literally every actual professional agreed that wasn’t the case. They were impressions not people. The ‘born a ghost’ and ‘timestream ghost’, if those were true at all, raised some questions though she guesses. Not pleasant ones, considering her job. But ghosts hurt people and were evil, not matter how the things were made. “-half Shade equals half impression. Duh”.

Valerie blinks at him, “so you’re half a typical ghost, that tells me nothing about Danny’s issue, Phantom. Though fine, nice to know why the heck things don’t damage you as much as they’re supposed to”, that was something that pissed her off to no end.

“I don’t have a corpse-”.

“Yeah no shit, you literally just said that ‘impressions’ don’t have those. Cremated or whatever. Still not the point”.

Phantom glares at her, “and you wonder why no one likes explaining crap to you”. She scowls at him for that while he continues, “as I was saying, I don’t have a corpse because I never had one. My bodies still walking around. Living. Breathing. Beating heart. You know, the works”. Valerie just stares at him because what the fuck was he trying to say here. That he was a dead of someone still alive? That makes zero fucking sense. “That makes no sense, idiot”.

Phantom actually snorts at that, “unnatural things don’t usually make sense. Hot tip, don’t stand inside a forming ghost portal. Electrocution’s also a pretty shit way to go. Well, half go”.

Valerie will admit to cringing at that, how ghosts died wasn’t really something she cared to think about or know. Especially since she’s sure most went in pretty nasty ways. “Congrats, that sounds.. awful”, tilting her head, “wait”, while Phantom mutters, “oh it was. Don’t recommend”.

Valerie squints at him, “Danny got electrocuted bad. His...”, frowning, “his parents said that gave him the... contamination”.

Phantom nods slowly, almost softly, “yeah”. While Valerie’s having just a slight freak out here. “Me forming was strange for everyone involved. But we hit it off immediately, got along. Makes sense being one and the same. Part of each other”, he does the closest to a shrug he can and she really doesn’t like where this is going, “it was ultimately him who chose my name you know. Danny Phantom for me, because it sounds like his. That, and it’s a pun”, chuckling and not even looking at her, like he was talking to himself at this point, “my suit, chosen by him. My symbol, designed by another human friendly. I am his pride and joy, I exist because of him. I’m his shadow”, looking to her, “Danny Fenton’s Shadow”.

Valerie just stares at him for a bit, “bullshit. You- no you are not part of him. No- what the fuck”, and scowls at him. The stupid thing is, it explained being identical. Stupid stupid stupid. She wanted nothing to do with it and didn’t want it to be happening. Holy fuck.

Phantom sighs and gives her a look that’s close to pitying, which she is absolutely having none of and promptly slaps him lightly; though he moves his head with it likely out of shock more than anything else. “Oooookaaaaay. I go baring my metaphorical soul to you and tell you my freaking death and you slap me? fucking seriously Val?”.

Valerie smacks him again but gentler, “don’t call me that!”.

“That an order to both me’s or just the dead one”. The bitter slightly snarky comment is more than enough to get Valerie’s mind back on track and force her to force herself to calm down. Valerie moving to sit against the bed leg and run a hand through her hair, sighing loudly. “Danny, living Danny, can call me whatever the Hell he wants. You call me Red, Phantom”, leaning her head back and sighing again, “this is really messed up”, sighing for the third time, “are you... are you seriously saying that you are part of Danny?”.

Phantom leans his head back, “intrinsically. Symbiotically eve-”. Valerie cutting him off with a snap, “explain”. That seems to get him upset again, him jerking his head up and eyes flaring green, “explain what!?! I already told you how this crap happened to us!”.

“That’s not what-”.

“Ancients fuck why did I think this was a good idea?!?!”.

“Phantom shut up”.

“No! Fuck you at this point! Ancients fuck!”.

Valerie blinks at him as he just bangs his head into the wall angrily. This didn’t seem faked. It really really didn’t. Maybe being half whatever changed things. Oh goddamnit. Her whispering, “you really actually do have emotions, don’t you”.

“Surprise surprise! All of us fucking do! It ain’t shit unique to me! Hunters are just a bunch of fucking bigots!”.

Valerie cringes at that. Curling up and tucking her knees under her chin, arms wrapped around her legs. “I fucked up”

“Oh you don’t say miss decides to hunt, maim and destroy an entire species because of a fucking dog wrecking some shit and labelling them all less than human things that deserve to be conquered into oblivion like some crappy ass Christopher Columbus”

“Okay that was just mean”.

“Fuck off. I think I’ve fucking earned being mean to you”.

Valerie blinks at him, she had never seen Phantom behave like this. Sure he got ‘mad’ sometimes but what the Hell. Was it because of her less than stellar reaction to him ‘baring his soul’? But how could the bastard blame her? He was telling her that he was an impression of one of her only friends! Someone she had -and still has if she’s honest with herself- a crush on! How the fuck was she supposed to react to that bullshit. Hell! She wouldn’t even consider it if it wasn’t for the identical crap and Danny not healing... Shaking her head, she shouldn’t be focused on some ghost when Danny needed help. Sighing, “ignoring everything. How the Hell do I or we or whatever, get him to heal”.

Phantom scowls audibly and loudly at the ceiling before huffing and looking down at her, “humph. Well I guess that’s one fucking way to make what you care about more obvious”, and huffs again, “well for bloody well starters you'd have to let me off this fucking wall”. Valerie glares at him because Hell no, she wasn’t freeing him so he can just run off or do who knows what. He scowls at her, “for once in your life could you maybe, maybe, believe I don’t have some stupid ulterior motives for crap?! And besides! If I was bloody well strong enough to do shit right now I wouldn’t even be stuck at all! Heck! You wouldn’t even be helping at all”.

Now that catches her off guard, “so they messed you up too”. So Phantom was ‘too weak’ to fix Danny himself, meaning the ghost actually intentionally lured her to them... and she can’t even be mad at that.

He scowls at her some more, before grumbling, “can’t genuinely harm one without the other”. Which makes her pale a little. That was why Phantom had been defensive and asked what she cared about more. To destroy him... she’d have to hurt Danny. Maybe even kill him. Swallowing thickly, “oh”. Phantom gives back the most sarcastic, “yeah”, she’s ever heard.

She shifts a bit uncomfortably, “so... what’s wrong with you? Will ‘fixing’ you ‘fix’ him?”, she can hardly believe she’s asking after a freaking ghosts well being. She absolutely doesn’t blame him for squinting mistrustfully and disbelievingly at her. Him leaning his head back and speaking after apparently deciding she was ‘being genuine’; whatever that meant to a ghost... or part ghost whatever. “Okay it’s easier to just fucking explain what they shot us with”.

“So they shot both of you with whatever”.

Phantom sighs, “they only shoot once. One bullet”. Which makes zero sense, “what? Did they just hit both of you at once? That’s stupid terrible luck even by Danny’s standards”, Danny did have truly awful luck; this ‘Shadow’ thing felt like proof of that.

Phantom shifts a little, “kinda”, moving his hands around as much as his bindings will allow as he explains, “the thing basically caused some heart/core attack bullshit, which made us fall out of sync and kicked me out. Gave me the boot very painfully might I add-”, glares at her, “-for both of us. Also effectively paralysed my Core, hence being stupid weak and not being able to replenish any ecto I spend. Can’t recover for shit”.

Valerie hums a little to herself, “so you can’t heal either”, which would make it brutally easy to destroy the ghost. No wonder the G.I.W. wanted to do this... but with Danny involved no way can she even consider that. Then squinting as that nagging ominous feeling returns, “what do you mean ‘kicked you out’”.

Phantom sighs and looks around awkwardly, “I told you. Symbiotic. Codependent. Coexisting. Cohabitating. Yada yada. Etcetera etcetera”, nodding his head in Danny’s direction, “I know you and everyone else wonder where the heck I constantly fuck off to all the time. When I’m not out showing some ghost what’s what, I pretty much stay asleep in Danny’s body”.

Valerie blinks and gapes at him, “so a weird fucked up overshadowing”. She’s trying not to be ticked off. She really is.

“What? No. There’s no ‘someone taking control over someone else’ going on and you sure as shit don’t share organs with any ghost overshadowing you”. That thought makes Valerie mentally shudder, the idea of a ghost invading her body was bad enough but also mixing in Its organs; Hell no. Her blinking a little though, “you... share organs? Like, the Core? And your ectoplasm which I guess is why everyone thinks he’s ecto-contaminated but it’s really just you being there?”, squinting at the air, “does he need your Core to heal or something”. That would be exactly Danny’s luck; and hers too honestly. Zone damn this stupid ghosts Core having a ‘helpful’ hero complex.

Phantom shrugs and looks around, apparently calmed down fast enough to nearly give her whiplash, “ectoplasm does the healing actually. So the paralysed Core thing doesn’t really matter there”, grumbling a little, “still a fucking pain in the ass, or Core, though”, sighing and nodding his head at Danny again, “but yeah, our Core and heart are basically intertwined”, scowling, “and I’ve never been awake and up and about this long before. Which apparently makes me cranky and emotional”, actually growling a little which pretty well confirmed him being moody, “which is making me deplete my energy even more. Which is annoying and making me more pissy”, grumbling at the floor, “fucking bullshit cycle of bullshit making a giant mound of awful smelly dragon shit and maybe someone threw in some diarrhea to really drive me up the walls in some desperate attempt to escape the literal sea of bullshit”.

Valerie blinks and snorts a little, “oh stop whining you ecto-baby”, then grimacing, “also, that’s seriously disgusting”. He scowls at her but chuckles a little. Her shuffling and standing up, being more serious, “if this keeps up with you, you’ll run yourself dry, right? Probably destroy yourself”, continuing at his annoyed nod, “and what? Will Danny just not heal then?”. That would be bad but if it wasn’t for the fact that he wasn’t waking up then he could arguably live fine. He’d just have to stay on top of the perpetually open wound and be more careful to avoid injuries. But... him healing would be better. Stupid Phantom having to be inside his freaking body or not.

Phantom rolls his eyes, “worse than ‘not heal’. I ‘die’, he dies. A person doesn’t get to exist as half a soul. Our odd crap pushes the boundaries of nature already as it is. Death and life has already had it up to here with us”, huffing, “and he’s not waking up because he’s effectively feeding me emotional energy through the air in an attempt to make up for my stupid lack of ecto-energy. Just the same I’m feeding him shedded ectoplasm to try to encourage healing. It’s enough to stop the bleeding but that’s it. Hence why I can’t leave. Both of us will fall apart. Well okay, he’d hemorrhage blood like a fountain, I’d dissolve into a puddle of ectoplasmic goop. Which would make your floor a very not pretty painting”.

Valerie looks down at him then to Danny, roughing her hair up which she absolutely catches Phantom mutter, “damnit, that’s hot”. Making her snap her head to him and screw her face up, “what???”, his cheeks are practically glowing green so he probably hadn’t meant to say that. But also, who the heck goes from graphic descriptions of death to ‘oh by the way you’re hot’.

He immediately gets all defensive, “we share everything! all right! Memories. Thoughts. Emotions. Feelings. Everything”. That just makes her screw up her face more, “so I basically dated you too. And wait a fucking second-”, going wide-eyed, “-does he know I’m Red then????”.

Phantom gives an impressively awkward, “I mean? Technically? Though yeah on the Red thing, fucking duh honestly”.

She’s not sure whether to be pissed, relieved, or scared. “I can’t fucking believe you... Believe you two”, scowling, “I would hit him if he wasn’t passed out”.

Phantom shrugs, “eh hitting me would achieve the same thing, but I’d rather you not. We’re getting kinda off track here and I’d really like to be home and he’d really like to not have a big hole in his chest”. Valerie scowls but glances at Danny, messing with her hair again though giving Phantom a weird look right after and pointedly stopping. “So is he... going to remember all this? See your memories?”.

“My memories are his memories”.

She absolutely groans over that, tilting her head back and glaring at the ceiling. He probably remembered her shooting at Phantom as if she were shooting at him, at the human Danny. Danny was even more reckless and stupid than she thought but... it made her feel kind of happy and warm.

“You’re blushing”.

She shakes her head and scowls at the stupid smirk on Phantom’s face, “shut up. He’s just stupid selfless that’s all”.

Phantom snorts and rolls his eyes, “I’m no different, you just don’t want to acknowledge that. Like I said”, then speaking in a singsong voice, “hunter bias and bigotry”. She hates that he has a point. She really really does. Stupid ghost. Stupid teenage boy.

She shakes her head, this is stupid, “I’ll freak out about that some other time. How do we fix this? Since I’m guessing you can’t”.

Phantom again gives her a look that clearly questions her intellect, “step one, release me”. She groans and glares at him but relinquishes and deactivates the device. Phantom standing up and brushing off his legs like they got dirty somehow, “fucking finally. Ancients you are difficult”.

“Apparently you’ve known that for a while and explicitly”.

“Shut up, I’m bitchy and moody”, him walking over to Danny, putting a hand on his forehead and frowning, “he’s starting to get a fever”.

Valerie groans, seriously? For fucks sake. “You've got to be kidding me. On top of everything else?”, glaring at the unconscious Danny a little, “you have the worst luck”.

“He can’t hear y-”.

“Shut up”.

Phantom chuckles before frowning again, “it’s because my Core’s ice. His body basically uses my Core to keep cool, regulate body temp. Core’s his own personal little ice pack and ac system. He can’t cool down without it”, grumbling, “not that I can cool him with a paralysed Core”. Valerie sighs, “we’ll deal with that later then. I don’t know how to un-paralyse a Core. How do we get you back in there to heal him with your ecto whatever”. She seriously can not believe she is trying to get a ghost inside someone. Even if that someone was apparently themselves or whatever the fuck. Half themselves? Ugh, this is ridiculous.

Phantom fidgets a bit, which fuck is ominous. “Okay step two, I need that pacifying basifier thingy of yours”.

Valerie quirks an eyebrow but hands it to him. Because at this point why the heck not give dangerous weapons to reckless dead guys that already use their fists like weapons of mass destruction. Fuck her life. “And if I wasn’t going to just give you my stuff?”.

Phantom smirks a bit as he sits down to tinker, “I’m not above mild petty theft”. She shoves his head for that one and grimaces over him ripping her gun apart and messing with stuff. While Phantom starts rambling, “I can’t merge with him all paralysed ‘cause my Core can’t connect and shit past all my ectoplasm. Hooray, a situation where my ecto is a real true pain in the ass, and I’ve been so good to it. That’s a lie, I’ve abused the shit out of it”, waving a hand around, “so need to be just my Core, not that I’ll be able to move like that. See I was just gonna knock you out or something. Sit on his chest, use this modified thingy, letting Core me just sorta fall on his chest and sink in”, doing small jazz hands, “tada”.

Valerie scowls, “fuck you too then”, though she does understand a little. And at least he had a plan.

“Desperate times, desperate measures”, tilting his head and chuckling a little, “in desperate times, desperate measures will be my pleasures”.

Valerie gives a very deadpan, “I hate you”, then sighs and crosses her arms, looking down at him, “well sitting on him probably won’t help his condition”.

Getting a cheery, “nope”, in response.

Valerie sighs again, choosing to ignore him being an idiot, “so what are you doing that doesn’t involve making the sick injured human more sick and injured”.

Phantom looks up at her and squints, “you could... pick me up and put me in him yourself”. Valerie can practically physically feel the cautiousness in that statement. Her swallowing, “and that won’t hurt anyone? Him, me, or, I guess, you?”.

Phantom grumbles, “it won’t feel all that pleasant for me. Our Cores are kinda sacred and sensitive to touch, you know. But no, it ain’t gonna hurt nobody”.

Valerie screws up her face a little, “that’s not meaning ‘sensitive’ in the sexual way is it?”, she doesn’t even want to know why her brain went that route. She emphatically doesn't. Phantom blinks and wheezes, starting to laugh hard enough that he has to stop tinkering, “what?!?!? No! I mean it can be but not like this or like that! Oh my Ancients! I can’t believe you asked that!”, then laughing some more, “that might have made my day!”, shaking his head and smirking at her, which she scowls at him for while he speaks, “don’t worry Red, it’s nothing like that. Haha”.

She huffs and shoves his head, “shut up, asshole”. He just snickers more so she crosses her arms. She’d turn her back on him but he’s still a damn ghost, even if she was apparently around him all the fucking time. He was apparently ‘asleep’ or whatever though, remembering whatever or not. So it’s a little different and that’s what she’s sticking to. Huffing a little while the ghost shakes his head.

Phantom eventually makes a stupid silly little cheer sound, “ah! Alright yeah, this should work”. The two of them kinda staring at each other for a bit, she could practically read caution and worry in his green eyes. This ‘emotional’ ghost thing was weird. But she sighs, she needs to look after Danny and this crap was basically all she had for options. So she takes the initiative, “I’m not gonna hurt your Core or whatever”, at him still staring, “or experiment on it”, getting more staring, “and I’ll put it, you, whatever, right in Danny’s chest. Happy?”.

He watches her for a bit before nodding, though not exactly looking pleased, “alright. But I, and Danny, am holding you to that”. Valerie gulps and nods, watching him stick the now disk-shaped ‘gun’ over his chest and push it to make a little pulse thing. The light’s a little blinding but she hears the orb? hit the ground with some static sounds following.

Blinking down at the pale blue glowing ball. Alright, so this is a Core. Fuck this is weird. “Alright self, time to pick up a freaking ghost organ. Fuck this is so messed up”. It makes some kind of bubble noise. Her shaking her head, “can you hear me or something”, it makes a hum sound that time.

Fuck it. She bends down and picks it up gingerly, hurting this thing would at the very least slow how quickly Danny could heal. Or make the fever worse. “That’s weird. This is weird. Fuck this entire day and the G.I.W. too for good measure”. It makes more bubbles, which she decidedly ignores.

Hold the thing oddly just felt like holding a ball, which probably wasn’t normal especially considering the whole ‘paralysed’ thing. Shaking her head and staring down at Danny some before going for it and simply placing the ball over his chest, near where the fucking gunshot wound was, and staring down as it seeps down through flesh and bone like it’s melting into him. After a bit, she elects to slump down tiredly in her shitty brown chair and just watch him. She’ll check the wounds and apparent fever every so often but there’s not much else she can really do. And that pisses her off just a little bit.

-

Valerie immediately bolts up and too Danny’s side when he groans, turns his head, and screws his eyes shut even more. “Danny?”. He just groans at her but does open an eye a little bit, “ugh”.

She sighs, at least he was awake, “first, how are you feeling? Second, I am so pissed with you”, she makes sure to add a bit of humour to that last bit.

Danny closes his eye, squeezes them and then opens both of them, “Val?”. She nods, “yeah. I’m here. Do you need anything?”. He exhales a bit heavily, “uh. Cold drink would be nice”. Which she kind of expected and thus had some ice water on hand, immediately passing it over to him, “thanks. So uh, all that, huh?”.

Valerie scoffs, sitting down on the floor leaning against the bed, hearing him turn over onto his side as she speaks, “yeah. Fucking bullshit. You’re bullshit. Phantom’s bullshit”, pausing and fiddling with her hair some, “the stuff he said, Phantom, was all that true?”, huffing, “I guess with remembering it the answer’s kinda obvious”. And fuck her over that. Because damn did this complicate stuff and raise so many moral questions about what she does. Because hasn’t she been effectively trying to destroy her friend, or part of him anyway, for years.

Danny chuckles sounding kinda tired, “yeah. But could we seriously not argue anymore. I kinda threw all my emotional energy at Phantom. Tired now... and hot. Oh and my chest feels like shit”.

Valerie shakes her head, “never can shut you up. And I’m not about to argue with you, Danny”, pulling herself up to sit on the bed next to him, hugging her knees, “but just how you are you? Like, where does Danny start and Phantom end? Is he literally just knocked out right now?”.

Danny sighs, “it’s complicated. We’re just two parts of the same person so there really isn’t an end or beginning. Though Phantom’s sleeping yeah, more like being dormant though“, shifting and looking her in the eyes, “appreciate being gentle with my Core though”.

“It’s stupid weird to hear you say ‘my Core’ especially since you’re talking about Phantom’s Core. Which is technically your Core”, and grumbling into her knees a bit incoherently.

Danny nods, “everything about my life, half-life, is stupid weird. Welcome to it I guess. Can I ask what you got all blushy about? After Phantom commented very stupidly -fuck I can’t believe he said that- on your hair fiddling thing”.

Valerie immediately heats up a little again, because this time it’s Danny not Phantom and that matters. Even if they’re kinda apparently the freaking same. “I... well, I never really stopped liking you. I just thought I was protecting you. Which now feels supremely stupid”. She had been trying to protect him from his fucking Ghostly body roommate. Heck! Danny was effectively protecting him.

He huffs a chuckle, “because it was stupid”, sighing, “though I could have been honest with you, but in a way I was protecting you. So it’s not really all on you. Though more we were protecting you, though when either of us says ‘I’ we usually mean we; same person and all that”. Danny adjusts and shoves the blankets around, probably seeking out a slightly cooler spot.

Valerie hums, staring forward, “stick to singulars honestly. Especially if Phantom’s just... you but a ghost. You constantly pointing out there’s a freaking ghost taking a nap in you is gonna freak me out right now. I’d really rather just make sure you’re alright”.

Danny pats her foot and smiles a little, though she can tell he’s got a fever now. He just looked overheated. “Sam and Tuck find it weird too but they like weird shit”.

She snorts at that, “you don’t say”. Though she’s kinda glad they know about Danny, Phantom, and his/their crap.

Danny smirks in a very stupid Phantom way, “I dare say. But I'm as fine as I can be really. I’m hot, tired both physically and emotionally, and in pain. But I’ve been worse. And there’s not much you can really do for me. I just need to heal and wait out the paralytic... and Phantom needs sleep, that’s kinda obvious though”. She snorts at that, muttering, “he sure turned into an emotional baby for a bit there”.

“Heh heh. Don’t remind me. That was embarrassing. Least it was just you. Though... he had a point. About you. You can be frustrating”.

She huffs at that, “It’s called being a strong woman with a strong personality”. He hums a bit, closing his eyes, “oh that’s fine. I like that. It’s the blindly believing bigotry thing and the hardcore hatred boner”.

“You did not just call it that. I’d hit you but I don’t want to give you a concussion on top of everything”, sighing, “and Phantom... likes me too then. The sharing feelings thing”.

Danny shifts around some more, which honestly makes her want to scold him; he’s gonna rip his stitching. “I’m pretty sure I can’t get concussions. Phantom definitely can’t. And yeah, obviously Phantom does. The trying to murder him thing kinda kills it a little. Makes him a little put off”.

“And you’re not?”.

Danny sighs, “we can tell whose memories are whose, Val. Ghosts don’t see or feel the world the way humans do. You can look like a completely different person through Phantom’s eyes. All the anger that rolls off you and lashes at the air. The... loneliness too. He likes when you get protective though”, he blushes a little though it could just be the fever, “you feel nice when you’re like that”.

Valerie doesn’t know what to do with that information really; so she stuffs it in a neat little box in her brain. Maybe that’ll encourage the Box Ghost to come running and give her something to shit-kick. Instead she just asks, “he can see emotions? That’s got to be a mind trip”, yawning a little and deciding to get up before she falls asleep or something. “It fine if I check that wound of yours? Before I pass the Hell out”. He chuckles and nods though doesn’t really seem to care, “yeah. I’m used to it. Go ahead, might look kinda green though”. Valerie only sighs as she gets to work unwrapping him carefully, and tries not to be totally weirded out by the pale green crusting and the fact that she can literally see ectoplasm bubbling, or something, around the stitching. Pointing as non-judging as possible, “is this normal?”. This was literally Phantom’s ectoplasm sloshing around Danny’s wound.

He hums, pokes at his chest, and nods. Sounding way to apathetic, “yeah pretty much. Dissolving the stitching a little. I have special stitches that don’t cause that”. All she has to do is frown for him to continue, “not a problem though. You can wrap me back up and let me nap now”. She chuckles a little but does as she’s asked, “I could use some sleep too”.

After finishing up she watches Danny a little as he gets comfortable in her bed, this was weird and a bit surreal. Turning to eye her chair, that would seriously not be comfortable. But sharing a bed was a bit much and Danny was injured. And the Phantom thing felt like a weird elephant in the room at the moment to her. Apparently, Danny can read minds now though, and starts scolding her, “no. Bad hunter. No sleeping in that ratty-ass chair. I can share”, tilting his head, “huh. That rhymed”. Valerie glares at the ceiling in fake exasperation though trying not to be weird about him just calling her a hunter, while Danny keeps going, “so long as you don’t mind the bed getting nippy or that Phantom might hop out for a bit to escape the heat”.

Valerie turns and blinks at him, “that fucker better not try shit then”. Fuck it though, that stupid chair will give her a serious kink in the neck. So she crawls into bed, though keeping a blanket between them, “and you keep your hands to yourself and mind your wounds”.

Danny chuckles and clearly goes out of his way to hug her some, “who do you take me for? Tuck?”, him chuckling almost awkwardly but it was more like he knew he should feel awkward but didn’t quite feel it; she’s blaming that on being emotionally drained. “Though I am a bit of a sleep cuddler. Sam’s gotten a lot of blackmail photos out of that”. Valerie absolutely snorts a laugh over that. Though that sounds like he absolutely sleeps cuddled with Tucker mostly. Which was kind of funny.

-

Danny speaks up again after a bit, with her being nearly asleep, “hey Val?”.

“Hmm?”.

“Where does this leave us?”.

Valerie shifts a bit, eyeing and playing with bits of her hair. She honestly didn’t know herself. Obvious she wasn’t going to off Phantom’s ectoplasmic ass, she is so not going to kill Danny. But friends with Phantom? Maybe. She still hates his damn guts and all the crap he pulls. But that barely aligns with her view of Danny, kind sweet funny Danny. And he was still cute. It was really fucking strange seeing him in Phantom and Phantom in him now. “We’ll see I think. I’m still gonna best Phantom’s stupid butt but I don’t want his ectoplasmic hide anymore. And you’re my friend still. More than that?... I don’t know”, yawning, “but I sure as shit ain’t dating Phantom”.

Danny snorts quietly, “Val. If you did, I think I’d have a heart attack. Ancients, the town would have a heart attack. But yeah, I could do without the second-hand murder attempts. Phantom would be bummed if you stopped picking fights with him entirely though”, chuckling, “he likes fighting and seeing you improve. But if we want to try things again, between us, then you guys need to at least be friends. Dating while you were fighting him all aggression and venom, was difficult”.

Valerie doesn’t have to question that one bit, “yeah”.

“Yeah”.

Valerie rolls her eyes and tries to snuggle into the blankets a bit more, “go to sleep Danny”. He just chuckles.

-

Valerie absolutely does wake up at one point during the night with Danny’s face smushed into her back and arms around her waist. But she had muttered a quiet, “seriously?”, over noticing Phantom sprawled out over top of everyone. At least there were blankets between all of them.

End.

[octannibal-blake]

“ Bite me. ”

betcha thought i forgot about you.  surpise! here i am! sorry it took so long! this prompt was under the NSFW tag so this little fic is NSFW. There’s not really a plot, just some good ol’ debatin’ and fuckin’ and yes, those two things happen together. 

p.s this was written at like 4am so all mistakes are mine and i’m sorry in advance. enjoy!

(i never hated you) like i do right nowrated: Mature

“I did not ask you to come over just to have a debate with me, Princess.”

“All I said was that Greek mythology is just another example of patriarchal history,” Clarke says in between gasps as a pair of lips travels the length of her jawline leaving soft kisses long the sharp angles. She hadn’t intended to start an argument. She just so happened to see a copy of Edith Hamilton’s Mythology laying on his coffee table and couldn’t help herself. Any normal person would have just blown it off, especially when considering they’re about to get laid. However, Bellamy Blake is not a normal person. He gets personally offended any time you fudge up history – dates, people, you name it. He’s a know-it-all and he doesn’t care to admit. So she should have known her statement would pick a fight.

But fighting with him his half the fun. It’s what started this whole thing in the first place. They first met last year during a required sociology class when he tried to argue with her about the bystander effect. Now, she’s learned that debates are just who he is, but then she was fired up and ready to serve him good. She did, by the way, though he refuses to acknowledge she won that argument. Their relationship, or, whatever the hell you want to call it has been a clusterfuck ever since. They hate each other. Really, they do. But as her best friend, Raven, so eloquently puts it, there is nothing better than a good hate fuck.

She’s absolutely going to hell.

The first time is an accident. They’re fighting, per usual, at his house during their friends annual game night (yes, as fate would have it, they share a lot of mutual friends so Bellamy Blake became a staple in her life whether she wanted him to or not). It’s about something obscure, at this point she doesn’t remember. What she does remember is somehow ending up almost nose to nose with him, chests heaving after their typical exchange of insults, and his eyes flicking down to her lips. The rest, well, it just sort of happened. She had left his house that night adamant that it would never happen again. She hadn’t intended it to, at least, because she hates him and she got it out of her system.

Except she didn’t. Things spiral fairly quickly from there. So her current predicament is nothing new. In fact, this has been a common occurrence for the last six months. They fight. They fuck. It’s a fun arrangement. Enemies with benefits, if you will.

He places a kiss behind her ear before answering, “And what exactly is patriarchal about it?”

She slides her hand up his bicep, briefly admiring the sculpted muscle of his tanned skin before giving a roll of her eyes, “Half the stories are about Zeus sticking his dick where it doesn’t belong.”

His hand, which had been tracing soft patterns into her hip freeze and she feels him sigh into her neck, “No, that’s just the only stories people seem to know how to tell.”

She curls her hand around his neck, scraping at the hair sitting at the nape and he closes his eyes, enjoying the feel of it. It’s one of his many weaknesses, she’s discovered in their time getting to know each other, or, getting to know each other’s bodies, rather. She knows what makes him tick just as he does her – he can find the right places to touch at the drop of a hat, making her go weak at the knees. It’s definitely problematic, for many, reasons. All of which she chooses to ignore. She could let the argument fade there, kiss him until he finally takes her to his bedroom to fuck her good and well. But honestly, she’s having a bit of fun.

Instead, she pulls away from him and offers a sly smile, “IF it’s not about Zeus fucking his way through society, then it’s about Hercules or some other Hercules-eque hero trying to prove his masculinity.”

This seems to strike a chord with him. She giggles as he leans back with an audible huff, placing himself on the other end of the couch from her. He picks up the topic of discussion from the coffee table and flips through it. He folds the worn paper book back and shows her a highlighted page. She recognizes the title and rolls her eyes. At a glance, yes, it seems to be the kind of title to make one rethink their stance on women in Greek Mythology. But she’s read it and it does quite the opposite. At least, in her interpretation.

She crawls over to him and climbs in his lap easily, placing each of her legs on either side of his thighs. She can feel his dick twitch underneath her and she grinds down in response. He tips his head back to rest on the couch, the book falling loosely to the side. He’s so easily distracted. She takes the opportunity to leave a hot, open-mouthed kiss on his exposed neck and she feels his hands slide onto her hips, gripping them tightly. She ghosts her lips up, tracing his jaw and gently nibbling his ear. She’s got him right where she wants him, eyes unfocused and unprepared for what she says next.

“But the Trojan Women is a tragedy where the women are left to be tortured because men aren’t around to save them,” she whispers and grinds down once more for further effect.

He lets out a low growl before sliding his hands underneath her ass and standing them both up in one smooth motion. The way he sounds in that moment as well as the ease in which picks her up has her attaching her lips back to his neck, sucking at his pulse point as he carries her to the bedroom. He hears his door shut with an audible slam before he tosses her on the bed, eliciting a weirdly high pitched giggle from her (Clarke Griffin doesn’t giggle, except, apparently now she does).

He stands at the foot of the bed, reaching behind him to grab the collar of his shirt before pulling it over his head. She’s seen him naked a fair amount of times, by now, but looking at him is still such an unparalleled experience. The way muscles stretch across his tan skin, across his torso, and into his shoulders. She has a weird attraction to his shoulders, the dips and curves that continue into his back. He has a very nice back.

She thinks she’s won this argument at this point, having nearly forgotten what they were even talking about as he crawls onto the bed to join her. All she can think about is getting him out of his pants and having him fuck her into next week. She can feel the anticipation of it soaking her panties. As if sensing her thoughts, he gives her a smug grin before sliding his hands underneath her t-shirt, stroking at the soft curves of her hips. He pushes her shirt up, kissing from her stomach to her sternum. His hands find the underside of her bra and he slides them underneath it, barely passing along her breasts. She lets out a soft moan as he does it.

He pushes his mouth over her already hardened nipple, his breath hot through the thin fabric of her bra. She grabs his forearm tightly as he does it, reveling in the feel of his mouth on her. This is what he can do – drive her mad by touching her through her clothes. He’s got an amazing mouth, something she had heard about him before she even knew for herself. She was happy to know that he far exceeded the reputation that precedes him. He’s really fucking talented.

He finally moves up to kiss her and she leans in to meet his lips, but he dodges her, pushing his lips to her ears just like she had to him, “The Trojan Women is a story that gave women, who had little to no say in society, a voice.”

He’s toying with her, she realizes, trying to distract her so that she doesn’t win the argument. Leave it to him to still care about proving he’s right when in the middle of serious foreplay. Actually, she’s pretty sure that the debate is adding something to the foreplay. It’s strangely sexy to hear him talking about greek history while in the middle of turning her on. Two can play that game.

She reaches down and grips the hem of her shirt before pulling it over her head. Her breasts are practically spilling out of her bra, her nipple peeking through the fabric from his earlier attention. Deciding to really step up her game, she reaches behind her to unclasp her bra, leaving her completely naked on top.

His hands are on her instantly as he leans forward to kiss her. The kiss is soft while his hands palm at her roughly, the perfect contrast. He tries to deepen the kiss, tongue tracing at her bottom lip for entrance. Instead she takes his in between her teeth before pulling back and looking him square in the eye, “All it did was make women sound helpless because men weren’t there to save them.”

He kisses her hungrily and this time she doesn’t pull back, letting their tongues mingle as his hand travels down her sides into the waistband of her jeans. She shivers when his thumb runs along her hip bones and threads her hand into his messy curls so she can gently tug at them. Something about pulling his hair really gets him going. He reacts instantly, popping the button of her pants and sliding down her zipper in one smooth motion. He touches her over panties first, smiling against her lips as he feels how wet she is for him. As if to ensure that she loses all potential comebacks for the argument, he wastes no time pushing her underwear to the side so he can slide a finger in between her folds. She moans a bit louder this time as he begins to circle her clit. She pulls at his hair a little more to encourage him.

He slides a finger, then two, into her before he pulls back and presses a kiss to her nose, “It was a representation of all the shit Greek women were going through in real life.”

He crooks his fingers at just the right angle, then, and though it feels fucking amazing, she’s tired of not having the upper hand. She slides her own hand in between them and feels for the erection currently pressed against her thigh. He adjusts slightly, allowing her to be able to slide comfortably underneath his shorts and boxers to grab him completely. He practically thrusts into her hand and she kisses his shoulder as he tenses at the contact.

“It was written by a man,” she finally responds, though it’s a bit lame after all is said and done. At this point, she’s had plenty of foreplay. She lifts her hips from the bed and he doesn’t hesitate to pull grip each side of her jeans and pull them down, underwear included. He tosses them over the edge of the bed before beginning to push her legs over his shoulder. She doesn’t think she can physically take anymore.

“You know I love it when you fuck me with your mouth but if you do not get inside me within the next thirty seconds, I’m going to lose it.”

He laughs then, full and rich, and he backs off the bed with his hands raised in defense, “Your wish is my command, Princess.”

He kicks off his shorts and boxers before crawling on top of her. She spreads her legs, ready to feel all of him but he isn’t quite finished with her yet. He slides his cock over her entrance teasingly, running it up and down her sex but not pushing in. She wraps her legs around his waist to pull him closer but he seems to determined to make her suffer.

“Beg for it,” he growls into her ear. It’s one of the things that makes sex with him so exhilarating. He can be soft and gentle, but also really fucking dirty. And demanding, which came as a surprise to her because she’s the kind of person who has to be in charge but she loves when he tells her what to do. She aches for him in those moments, kind of like now.

“I need you to fuck me,” she complies, locking her eyes into his so he can see how much she wants him. At first, she thinks he’s going to make her work for it a little more, but then he pushes into her ever so slowly, filling her up with all of him. They both moan at the feel of it, familiar, warm, and perfect. He places a kiss onto her collarbone, then on her chin, and her cheek. He starts moving, slow strokes in and out of her as his hand strokes her side. She had been prepared for something rough and quick but the slower pace is so fucking good.

She can feel her orgasm already building, the foreplay having done a good job at getting her wound up. She’s so focused on the feeling in her core, she almost doesn’t hear him when leans his forehead on hers.

“I win.” he says and if she weren’t so fucking into this, she would shove him onto the floor. She wishes she could think of something clever to say back. SOmething witty or snarky but she can’t really focus on anything except the feel of him inside her.

“Bite me,” she manages to get out, the only two words she string together coherently. He only grins when she says it, leaning down to bit her shoulder, eliciting another long moan out of her as he runs his tongue over the mark he definitely left.

“Fuck,” she sighs as he does it, loving the feel of his teeth pressing into her soft skin. While she may have lost the debate, she’s determined to assert herself in some way.

She hooks her leg over his hip and pushes up. He picks up on the hint quickly, allowing her to flip them over so he his on his back and she straddles him. She sinks down onto him, using his forearms for support and she feels much more satisfied watching his eyes nearly roll back into his head.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he tells her, watching her ride him with such reverence it should actually scare her. The first time she had noticed it, it had. But now she understands that Bellamy is just very vocal about his appreciation, he likes telling her how good she look because he knows it gets her off. It does.

She picks up the pace, her breasts bouncing with each movement, and she can feel the edge coming closer. He reaches down to begin circling her clit again, causing her legs to shake uncontrollably.

“Come for me, baby,” he demands, meeting her thrust for thrust as his hand works it’s magic on her as well. His other hand reaches up for her, grabbing her neck and pulling her down into a searing kiss. He kisses his way into her soul, all passion and fire as she finally feels herself teetering over the edge. She moans into his mouth as she comes, and he continues to slam his hips into her. He takes her through the entire orgasm, kissing her like she’s the most precious thing in the world. She can tell he’s almost there as well but still needs that extra push.

“You’re so fucking good,” she purrs into his ear, “You always make me feel so good, Bell.”

He grips her hips in response, his own way of encouraging her to go on. She slows her movement, pushing herself up to his tip before slamming back down, “You look so sexy underneath me like this.”

“Fuck,” he breathes as he watches her, “Amazing, you’re fucking amazing. So good.”

“You gonna come for me, Bell? Huh?” she leans back and places her hands on his thighs, the angle change causing him to curse into the void. She goes with it, rocking her hips back and forth. It doesn’t take long before he taps her thigh and she moves off him quickly, getting him into her mouth before he comes with a guttural moan. She swallows him with a crooked smile as he takes a deep, shaky breath. She collapses next to him on the bed, chest heaving wildly.

He reaches for her, pulling her into his chest and stoking her back gently, eliciting  different kind of goosebumps along her spine. The cuddling is a relatively new development, though something they both seem to thoroughly enjoy. She prefers it like this, rather than awkwardly finding her clothes and leaving as quick as possible. She hadn’t thought him a post sex cuddler but he’s into it almost more than she is.

They lay there in silence for a while, just regaining their breath and relaxing into each other. Their debate seems long forgotten until she thinks of it, giggling softly at the thought.

“What?”

“Nothing,” she smiles into his chest, “I think that was the weirdest foreplay I’ve ever had.”

He looks down at her with a smoke, “You’re really hot when you argue greek history with me.”

She pinches his arm playfully, “You just like to fight with me.”

“True,” he agrees, “I also like winning fights with you.”

She scoffs at that, “You rarely ever win.”

“I just did,” he points out, tightening his arm around her when she tries to pull away.

“I call bullshit,” she laughs as she pretends to struggle in his arms, “You distracted me.”

“Face it, Princess, I’m just smarter,” he pins her to the bed with his body before tickling her side. She doesn’t want to laugh, she wasn’t to argue that statement alone, but he’s playing dirty.

“I hate you,” she manages with a laugh and he leans down to kiss her, quick and chaste. He has his signature crooked smile on when he pulls away and she realizes then how completely and totally screwed she is.

“Yeah, yeah,” he says quietly, his hand reaching up to move a stray curl from her forehead, “I hate you too.”

And it  isn’t true. Not even a little bit (but it’ll take a little longer for both of them to realize it).

[demigodofhoolemere]

Spoiler filled version. Seriously. You’ve been warned.

~~~

OH BOY. OH BOY. OHHHHHHHHH BOY.

I.... I cannot. I don’t know where to begin. So much happened. Some things I saw coming, some things I didn’t.

To echo my spoiler free review, it’s EMOTIONAL. I don’t think I ever stopped crying the whole movie. It started right from the get-go and did not let up until I walked out of the theater.

In regards to deaths:

- Called it that Heimdall was going to die (and that it would be him that Thor screams about), but it still wasn’t easy to watch. I adore him, especially since Ragnarok. I’m just glad that his death had weight rather than just getting killed in the same fell swoop as the rest of their people, and that he was given his due and proper recognition that he deserves because Thor was specifically avenging him when he almost killed Thanos. (Certainly better than what the Warriors Three got. Not that I’m still upset about that or anything...)

- I completely expected Loki to die, and as time went on it became clearer that it would happen quickly. While it leaves many wishes unfulfilled (like actually having a decent sized role to play or meeting other heroes and gaining some understanding from them - not necessarily forgiveness because that’s a big ask, but at least understanding - and perhaps even making friends), I can’t argue with the way they did it. I understand why they did what they did and though I’m kind of traumatized, I’m not mad like I thought I would be. My heart is very broken and I’m not sure I’ve ever sobbed quite that hard over a fictional death (and quite frankly it probably ranks as the most I’ve ever sobbed over fiction, unless I’m forgetting something, but either way it’s up there and it was certainly the most audible), and I wish there were a way to undo it but I get the feeling that this will be permanent (annoyingly driven home by Thanos immediately proclaiming that there will be no resurrections), and... weirdly enough, even though I’m destroyed, I think I can also be at peace with that because of the way it was done. He got to stick it to Thanos. He got to save his brother. He got to reclaim his identity as a son of Odin. He got his turn to brag that he’s got the Hulk on his side. I think he was very much finally back to being the Loki he used to be, the person he was in his youth with Thor, and he’s embraced that inside of him and he’s embraced fighting for what he believes in, what he cares about, and he’s back to being the voice of wisdom and even optimism (”the sun will shine on us again” fun fact I am actually a very dead person writing this). That’s all I ever wanted as an end for Loki. That said, I would not have chosen to have him choked to death. Something quicker and less painful to watch would have been preferable. The image of Loki having the life choked out of him, his veins popping and his eyes bugging out, hearing the crack of his bones, seeing his motionless body and lifeless eyes.... that’s going to haunt my dreams for a long time. Utterly horrific and I don’t think he deserved to be in that much pain in the end. He’s paid his dues, let him have a little more peace than to have his neck caved in by his torturer as he’s forced to look him in the eye as the last thing he ever sees. And seeing poor Thor crawling to his body and crying... I can’t take it. Letting Loki make his choice and have a heroic last stand, that’s emotionally satisfying, and if he doesn’t come back then I think his story ended the only way it was really bound to end and I can find peace in that (though there will 10000% be days where I will make up literally anything as an excuse to bring him back, because I’m me and I love him, and that may well end up being every day considering my emotions have been giving me whiplash for the last few hours alone). I just wish the visual were not as sickening to watch. And, I mean, while I’m discussing what I would change, I wouldn’t let him die to begin with. I love and appreciate the sacrifice, but if I could make it so he didn’t have to die at all, I’d pick that without hesitation. And if they happen to want to bring him back miraculously (unlikely but... whatever), I would be very happy. It’d have to be in a way that doesn’t undercut his sacrifice, because that was very meaningful for him as a character - though we would still know that he did choose to do it in the original version of reality, so no matter what they changed, his heart would have always been in that place anyway and that’s what matters. I care more that he lives. I’m devastated and I just want him back.

- I definitely predicted that Gamora would be kidnapped by Thanos, because there were trailer clips where she’s with Peter, Drax, and Mantis, but in clips that seemed to take place later on, she was mysterious absent. But opposite to what I expected, Gamora was definitely in much more danger than Nebula. Now, I have a feeling that we’ll still see Gamora again, but that didn’t make it less horrifying to see anyway. I love her and she was in so much anguish this whole movie, it broke my heart. Undone or not, seeing her lifeless body was awful, and so was poor Peter’s reaction to her death. He was so broken and it hurt so much to see.

- You gotta make me watch Vision die twice in the span of, like, 3 minutes? Thanks for that double heart attack. Like Gamora, I have hope that he might be able to come back, but it’s still horrifying to watch, in two different and equally traumatic ways. I don’t like seeing his body become a lifeless lump of machinery. He’s more than that.

- I expect everyone that died in the half-the-universe culling will be restored. I’d be much more concerned if so many of the ones taken away were not ones who I know come back in the future. Still awful, of course, but I definitely felt those deaths much less, because at that point, you have to undo something like that. It’s the ones who died otherwise that I’m really worried for, because even though I’m holding onto hope, I know that some things will be permanent, and it’s not likely to be the deaths of half of the entire universe.

Other emotions:

- I was wondering if that Asgardian distress signal was Loki, it was just too staticky for me to be sure (and you KNOW the audio really is scratchy when I’m not completely certain that I’m hearing Tom Hiddleston’s voice), but apparently it really was him which really really hurts. EDIT: I forgot exactly what he said in the distress signal and HOLY CRAP I’M HURTING EVEN WORSE. “Please, help us, there are families on board, innocent people, children.” KILL ME!!!!

- Seeing more of Gamora’s backstory and seeing her let all of her emotions loose absolutely wrecked me.

- I loved seeing Thor finally break down after all he’s lost. Totally broke my heart, and really puts in perspective how alone he is now. I loved that Rocket was trying so hard to help him find something good that he could still have left, and genuinely listened to him.

- What is it with one half of a couple asking the other one to kill them?! First Gamora with Peter, then Vision with Wanda. You’re killing me here, guys, I’m not strong enough for that kind of angst.

- My levels of ‘oh man Tony could die’ have fluctuated a lot over time, and going into the movie now I honestly couldn’t tell you one way or the other whether I expected him to live or not, but seeing him stabbed was TERRIFYING. In a weird way I also sort of figured they’d find a way to fix it, which is completely contradictory to my concerns for his life, but for some reason when it came down to the moment, despite my horror, I felt like they wouldn’t go through with it, which I’m endlessly thankful for (he could still die in Avengers 4 but I’m not going there). I’ve never been so indebted to Stephen (it feels a little like Luke Alvez on Criminal Minds, in that he keeps doing awesome things to protect other characters and it just makes you go ‘oh thank goodness, that’s another one I owe you my life for’). I relate to Stephen because I, too, would risk half the universe for Tony Stark. (And I was very glad to see him have a difficult time when actually faced with the choice between the universe and an individual - he’s a very logical and moral character and he has to have his priorities, but the way he’d previously stated that he wouldn’t hesitate was insensitively worded and just didn’t feel right, because the core of Stephen’s character is the desire to preserve life, no one is any less important than others. He is first and foremost a doctor, and he wouldn’t be able to stand by and watch someone die if there was something he could do. Even if he chooses the majority in the end, he would still have serious struggle.) Of course, I totally think that Stephen giving over the Time Stone was not only about Tony, and definitely about reaching the outcome where they win. His last words were, “There was only one way,” (or something to that effect, I don’t trust my memory for exact dialogue) which tells me that he saw that doing this would eventually lead to something that would end up saving them.

- Steve watched Bucky die again. Rocket watched Groot die again. Okoye watched her king and friend die. The Guardians watched each other die. Everyone watched people they cared about be decimated to flakes. Thanks for that.

- WHEN PETER WAS THE LAST TO GO AND HE WAS JUST CLINGING DESPERATELY TO TONY AND CRYING THAT HE DOESN’T WANT TO GO, HE WAS JUST A VULNERABLE CHILD BEGGING FOR THE COMFORT OF A FATHER, I CAN’T I CAN’T

- TONY’S WORST FEAR IS EVERYONE DYING WHILE HE HAS TO LIVE WITH IT AND NOW IT’S HAPPENED RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS EYES

- I just can’t help but feel ill for Tom Hiddleston, I know how much he loves and genuinely cares for and empathizes for Loki, how much of his soul he’s poured into him. I can’t imagine how he must feel to say goodbye to the character and especially to film that scene.

Character interactions:

- Character interactions were so so good. Old friends got to have more time together and lots of new dynamics were created. I truly appreciate the attention given to these relationships, because this is a very character-driven movie, and cinematic universe, and the only way this was gonna work was to work with the characters not just as individuals but as friends and allies. There were a couple of dynamics that I’d have liked to see more of (specifically Stephen and Peter P, because their friendship in comics is so sweet and longstanding and I was just expecting more than there was), but I’m very pleased with what we got.

- Wanda and Vision are faves of mine and seeing them together always makes me happy (until it makes me sad, of course). I loved the development of their relationship, they’re so precious and they made me cry so many times.

- I loved what was done with Peter and Gamora. They kissed, they said their ‘I love you’s, there was such deep understanding and partnership between them, and it got so emotional so many times. It’s all I could have asked for.

- Never expected to have a new brotp of Thor and Rocket but I love it. It was interesting to see their different humors come together, and especially lovely to see more emotional moments.

- Tony and Stephen is probably the dynamic I was most looking forward to and I wasn’t disappointed. Their bickering was a lot of fun, and they got to have some wonderful serious moments as well. All in all, the start of a beautiful Awesome Facial Hair Bros relationship.

- Gamora and Nebula’s concern for each other just destroyed me.

- Thor and Loki also killed me of course. Some things never change with time and my feelings about those two is one of those.

- I’m so glad they expanded upon Stephen and Wong’s friendship! Such casual and domestic stuff like needing money for food or sharing a favorite ice cream flavor. Exactly what I wanted.

- Tony and Peter P being father and son messes me up so much, I love them.

- Absolutely adored the dynamic between Wanda, Okoye, and Natasha. Gonna need more of this friendship.

- Lots of other things that I might add when I remember them

Things that shocked me:

- Clint genuinely was not in this movie. When the Russos said they’ve planned a long game for him I kind of figured it would be part of this, not just Avengers 4. Even just five seconds of screentime? End credits scene? No Scott either? Ok then. I guess the big secret of why they’re not in trailers or on posters actually is because they’re literally not in it at all.

- Speaking of the end credits scene, I lost my freaking mind and nearly shrieked out loud when I saw the Captain Marvel logo. I figured it had to be her that Nick was calling. I’m so glad that Carol is coming, I can’t even express it.

- RED SKULL?!?! My jaw has never dropped so low so quickly. I wondered if he would ever come back in the future but this was totally unexpected.

- By some sort of complete and total miracle, Steve LIVED. He was the one I was most geared up to lose, and I still fully expect him to die in Avengers 4, but for now he’s actually freaking alive which is truly the last thing I ever saw coming, and quite the relief. Nothing makes you appreciate a character quite like thinking they’re going to die.

- Have to say, I expected Ebony Maw to be a bigger problem. Not that I’m disappointed, I’m glad he’s out of the way so I don’t have to worry about him anymore, but I was really expecting them to pull something where Stephen gets taken over by him like the Infinity comics. Good for Stephen though, so I’m certainly glad to be wrong in this case.

Hope:

- Unless Avengers 4 undoes it, which doesn’t feel likely, I don’t have much hope for Loki outside of my very anxiously pretending that he can get up and walk it off, but while logic says his chances are slim, the rest of me can’t say goodbye to him just yet and I can’t write him off as permanently dead until Avengers 4 does whatever it does. There’s a long shot possibility that is him suddenly having the ability to create tangible copies and so it could be a copy that he sent to make Thanos think he’s killed Loki and meanwhile the real one would be out looking for help and going unsearched for because they wouldn’t know to search for him. Obviously a long shot that requires suspension of disbelief in regards to his powers, and I’m sure it won’t happen, but to save him I’d totally be willing to overlook a nonsensical solution. Have Stephen go back in time far enough that it can be changed. I don’t care. If they wanted to, I think you could find a way to do it without being ridiculous. He did disappear for a few minutes and suddenly came back to talk to Thanos when he could’ve left (not that he’d leave Thor, though, unless he knew EXACTLY what he was doing). No matter what happens, this stuff is definitely what I’m gonna use when I find myself needing to pretend that he’s fine. (I do wonder if part of the reason I’m somehow calm about it at the moment even though it so thoroughly destroyed me is because my emotions about it were way too strong and now my mind is trying to reject reality in order to protect itself.)

- Gamora could still come back if Thanos is able to do it, or if it gets undone by whatever the heck is happening in Avengers 4. I sincerely hope so, because she doesn’t deserve what happened to her at all. Now that she finally has family and people who love her and would never hurt her, she should not have to just be used as a sacrifice by her abusive “father”.

- They seemed to be setting up the idea that Vision can survive without the Mind Stone, and Shuri was working on the way to achieve it, so there’s still a chance that she could somehow revive him. The grayscale and the chunk out of his forehead looks bad, but it’s potentially fixable, 1) because it’s Shuri and 2) because while Vision is very human, his body is still mechanical, and machines can be rebooted.

- Again, I expect that the folks who crumbled away will be brought back. You can’t really pull something like that without undoing it.

Miscellaneous:

- I really liked how many shots looked like they could have just been live action comic panels. One thing that stuck out to me in particular was Drax as a pile of parts and Mantis as a ribbon. Totally the kind of insanity you’d find in the pages of a comic.

- Loved seeing Stephen’s various uses of magic. So much of it felt and looked VERY comics-like. My favorite has to be him sitting cross-legged in midair, because he does that so constantly in comics and it made me so happy to see come to life. I almost missed what Tony and Peter Q were talking about because I was just so happy looking at Stephen floating in the background. And he had that more eloquent way of speaking as well. “Hither to undreamt of” is totally something he’d say.

- Those ten seconds of Stephen in comfy, casual clothes. I always forget that he would actually ever wear anything but that same outfit anymore.

- That brief interaction between Bucky and Rocket made my entire life.

- “Wong, you’re officially invited to my wedding!”

- I loved Rhodey sticking it to General Ross.

- SOME SERIOUS IRON BABY FORESHADOWING, DON’T LET ME DOWN AVENGERS 4

- Loved seeing Gamora singing to the music, so sweet.

- Peter Parker is adorable. Nothing to add. He’s just precious.

- Sam was a gift as always.

- I love that Mantis has been told the story of the great hero Kevin Bacon. Also that was so cute with the Peters talking about Footloose, though it quickly becomes disheartening for poor Peter Q.

- I loved the moment between T’Challa and M’Baku and that they consider each other brothers now.

- My love for the Cloak of Levitation knows no bounds. (Here’s a question: did the Cloak disappear because Stephen was wearing it, or did it just happen to be part of the half anyway?)

- I love seeing Bucky having adjusted to a more Wakandan way of living and actually being healthy and happy and SMILING. He’s finally becoming himself again and I’m so happy for him.

- Soul Stone finally revealed!

- Very interested in whatever the heck is happening with Bruce and Hulk. And I’m glad that they finally seem to be confirming that they are two separate beings, because the rest of the MCU up to this point has been really unclear about that, they go back and forth on what the case is.

- Also very interested in further interactions between the survivors. Tony and Nebula sounds like a fascinating dynamic and I can’t wait to see how they figure out a way to get off of Titan, and you’ve got characters like Rocket and Thor who have completely lost their families and are now stuck in Wakanda with the interesting assortment of remaining Avengers.

- I just can’t wait to see what the heck happens in Avengers 4, especially what parts the remaining characters have to play and particularly the ones who had little screen time or weren’t present at all.

- There’s a certain satisfaction in Tony finally being proven right about future alien threats.

- Also GREAT satisfaction in other characters finally learning about and acknowledging that Thanos was behind New York.

- “I am Groot.” “I am Steve Rogers.”

- It’s hilarious and adorable to me that Groot-speak is genuinely an elective language class on Asgard and that Thor took it.

- So awful seeing Nebula pulled apart, and to realize the extent of her replacements.

- Such cruel irony that Stephen gets tortured by what was designed to be a surgery tool.

- TONY JUST BEING A WONDERFUL PERSON AND TAKING THE TIME TO HELP A WOMAN UP AND MAKING SURE THE GUY WHO CRASHED HIS CAR GOT HELP, I LOVE HIM

- Will probably add more

~~~

This movie was completely heartbreaking, for sure. But it was done in a way that respected the characters and their stories, and for that I can’t be as upset as I expected to be. I’m weirdly at peace with what happened, despite the effect it’s all had on me (probably shock). There are things I expect to be undone in Avengers 4, and things that most likely will not, and much as that pains me I think, shockingly, I might actually be able to handle it (eventually, I’m still reeling right now) because of the way they did everything. This was really a very good movie and I’m glad that my faith in the Russo brothers’ ability to pull such a thing off was not misplaced. The plot was fascinating, the pacing was excellent, the acting was incredibly moving as always. Aside from the pain, and somehow even during the pain at times, I actually had a good time.

[joemerl]

Faebruary/Februfairy 2021, Day 7: “Water Sprite”

Prompt list

The teenage boy stood at the edge of the water, his heart beating just a bit faster than usual. He shivered and looked around; the pool deck was high enough to both see and be seen over the fences, but none of his neighbors were outside this late at night.

He wasn’t sure what he was afraid of: that this would work again, or that it wouldn’t?

“No use standing around,” he muttered, and stepped over the edge, plunging easily into the deep end.

The water was pleasantly cool, somehow seemed warmer than the night air, and as always it seemed to loosen every muscle in his body. He always had always loved the water—his parents said that even as a toddler he had been a natural swimmer. But it was only lately that there seemed to be something strange about that.

He held his breath at first, almost for a minute, until his lungs were really starting to burn. He psyched himself up, then exhaled. He breathed in, choked just a bit at the sensation, but then cleared his throat. 

Breathe out...breathe in. Breathe out...breathe in. Water entered and left his lungs, a sensation that was unfamiliar but somehow, impossibly, non-fatal. 

He chuckled softly, and he could hear the chuckle. He kept his eyes open and they felt fine, even if the scene around him was shimmering weirdly. The last time he had tried this the chlorine had bothered him. For the last few days he’d cut back to about half of what he was supposed to put in—his parents would be annoyed when they got home, but it was worth it to help his experiment.

He looked down at himself, examining his hands. He closed his eyes. “Concentrate,” he murmured, the words distorted but still audible. “Concentrate…”

He opened his eyes slowly. The color was slowly fading from his skin. He gave a nervous smile and kept pushing. From brown to tan, but not to white, he was becoming translucent, and he felt—less solid, somehow. First he was like jelly, and then even thinner, all while he looked through his stomach, the outline of his body barely visible in the pool’s lights.

He gave one last push, and then it was like his skin was gone, just popped like a silent balloon. He could feel his bathing suit slip through him as he became nothing but water. He was bigger now—he could stretch his “arms” to what felt like ten feet. He could still see, though blearily, with eyes that seemed to rove around wherever he wanted to focus. 

He laughed, then laughed harder at the rippling sensation that it made through him. He began to move around the pool, not like himself but like a fluid, bending himself in circles and spirals that would have been impossible if he was flesh and blood. With no bones he could zip around in an instant, moving himself in any way that he desired.

At first he retained a sort of humanoid shape, but after a few minutes of tricks he felt like he was dissolving, like he was thinning out and losing himself in the thousands of gallons of water. With a twinge of fear he pulled himself back, willing himself back into shape, and then back into solidity. It took a few moments, and he was panting with effort by the time that he realized that he could pant. 

He blinked hard, confirming that he had real eyes again, and pressed his solid hands against his solid chest. He was floating supine near the bottom of the pool. He had lost his swimming trunks, which were drifting somewhere out of sight. More to the point, he still wasn’t his normal self. His skin was white, or maybe silver, and he could have sworn that it was glowing faintly. He normally had what his coach called a swimmer’s physique, but now he seemed even more lithe, as though he had been stretched out to be even leaner and longer. His body felt lighter, as if he still wasn’t quite as solid as he was used to. 

He twisted himself easily into a sitting position, then tried to swim. That wasn’t even the right word—he flew through the water, as easily as Superman or Peter Pan. With the slightest movement he could send himself halfway across the pool, then pull up to stop on a dime. He did three laps in the time that a normal person could have done one. He did loops and somersaults as easily as if his bones were made of reeds. It wasn’t quite like being water, but it was good enough.

He laughed again without even realizing it. He didn’t feel like some earthbound creature that was good at swimming. He felt like an aquatic being who had finally come home.

He spent the next few hours turning himself into water and back again, doing tricks and testing his abilities. He felt like singing, so he did. After a while he just floated along on his back, grinning to himself. His eyes closed. He felt about as happy as he ever had.

For a while he stayed there, breathing evenly, then suddenly jerked up, realizing that he had fallen asleep. Outside, naked, and underwater. The thought gave him a sudden panic, and for the first time in hours he rocketed toward the surface. 

With his first breath of air it was like a switch had been thrown—he choked, coughing up all the water in his lungs, and his body suddenly felt heavy and awkward once again. He grabbed the side of the pool, staring at his arms and chest. His skin was its normal brown again, normal, and the implications of that word made him wince in fear and shame. 

He clambered out of the pool and retrieved his towel from the patio chair, looking around anxiously as he tied it around his waist. The first rays of sunlight were just peeking out over the horizon, but it was still too dark for anybody to be outside. He breathed a sigh of relief. 

He decided to retrieve his bathing suit later. He was definitely going to try this whole thing again before his parents got back from their trip. The thought was too alluring, in spite of everything else. 

He looked at his hands. His fingers weren’t even wrinkled.

Once again the thought returned, the same one that he’d had the last time that this had happened: whatever he was in the water was not human. He wasn’t sure if that thought should be scary, exciting or both.  

“What am I?” he wondered.

The changeling boy shook his head, glanced back at the pool and then slipped quietly into the house. 

[xxcowardicexx]

Dream (Day 8)

*i was steadily coming back to consciousness, i was rather warm compared to earlier. i began slowly opening my eyes, in front of me the fire was burning a low slow burn. The fire’s light reflected off the cave’s natural emeraldesk walls. I could still feel her arm wrapped around my stomach, my ears folded down.*

*She did so much for me, I felt so worthless. i hung my head slightly at all the memories, from when she pulled me up from that pond. Watching over me through all those hours of the night, laying with me to help me not have a heatstroke from the fever or kicking it from hypothermia. Constantly hunting out game for not just her, but myself as well. I definitely didn’t ask for her help.... but without her, i probably wouldn't be around right now and that much I was extremely grateful for. There was a lot to make up for, and i had a few ideas on what i could do to make things a little bit easier for her here...* 

*I listened quietly, her breathing was that of almost a slight snore. Which made me smirk slightly. At least she was getting some well deserved sleep, but then my smirk left. Now i had to try and sneak my way out from under her embrace and not wake her. I started thinking, i brought my paw up to my chin when i realized i WAS a furry. I shifted my tail up to her arm, and softly pushed it up off my side as i used my right arm to pull her wrist up. It allowed me enough room to slither my way from under her arm. As I did so i lowered her arm down to her side.*

*Her blackish grey fur was soft, I sighed quietly. Her beauty was quiet remarkable. As she laid on the bed of thick moss, the fire flickered over her. It’s amber and orange hues played along the grey ends of her fur giving her a outline that shined in a way i couldn’t really put it into words its almost like she eclipsed the sun. I slowly sat up, my body was in knots. With a small scoot, i picked myself up moved slightly closer to the fire off of the bed of grass. She didn’t wake which was a small relief, because surely if i woke her without a good reason she would be upset. Hmm... if she awoke and i wasnt there she probably wouldnt be happy either, or as warm as she was for that matter...*

*Thinking, I lightly grabbed the part of the bed of moss i was laying on and covered her with it. It seems with my weight it compressed it all together making it like a makeshift blanket. Lightly tucking her in from my sitting down position my joints wanted to fight me, seems that the cold has put some stress on my body. I turned to try and slowly crawl a little bit closer to the fire when my back popped audibly, it made me wince in more than one way. Physically because it send a jolt down my spine, and mentally as i slowly looked over my shoulder at the fact she was still asleep. With a slight sigh i slowly stood.* 

*I stepped lightly across the floor towards the waterfall entrance, my right foot was feeling much better. Still sore, but much better. I stopped against the stone wall that was the entrance of the waterfall. I watched outside. The snow was still falling, the wind had calmed down a considerable amount from the day before. The sun was rising? I couldn’t really tell what time it was of the day other than it was earlyish. I took a couple steps away out into the snow to the closest tree. I shivered as i touched the bark of the old oak.*

*I grabbed the tree with both arms, i held onto it with as much strength i could bracing my upper body with the tree. I moved my left leg carefully shifting the angle of my hips, twisting my spine. My ears folded down from the sound of my disks popping, it sounded like branches breaking... Slowly oh so slowly... i moved my foot back and moved my right leg the same way, popping my back the rest of the way. It was painful at first, my legs were weak for the moment, then were better as i stood.*  

“ahhhhhhh” i sighed lightly

“mmmmm” i heard deeply inside 

*???* 

*i frowned. looking around making sure there wasn’t anything about.*

Whats wrong? Can’t i enjoy the stretches too? 

*-_- Must have been that being inside of me* 

I am you after all 

*With a sigh i continued popping all the joints i could. Holding my hand on my elbow, holding my arm at 90 degrees vertical and slamming it strait releasing an audible pop. Rotating my shoulders and popping my shoulder blades. I bent over, and touched my toes popping the lowest part of my back, right near my tail bone. I then moved to the feet, just rotating them until the pressure releases. I didn’t know how to pop my knees.. so i moved my back against the tree and began to pop my wrists, and my fingers in more than one way. I each one from the base away from the palm, then i grabbed each finger in the middle joint and bent them sideways.*

“*slight gasp* Ew~* i herd

* I looked up  and around and saw Beautiful leaning against the cave entrance slightly appalled but intrigued as i moved from my little dewclaw to the next, popping it sideways as well. She cringed as she saw bend in a way that she clearly didn’t like to see. I smirked at her reaction, I was used to it.* 

“How can you do that?!” she watched in slight disgust, then moving down to try and make her claws do the same, wincing in pain as hers wouldn’t.

*chuckling* “ I’m double jointed in all of my fingers, even my thumbs” I said popping my middle finger sideways in a way that showed that it clearly wasn’t supposed to. 

“EW~ stop thats gross!” she exclaimed slightly looking away. 

*laughing now she looked at me as i finished popping my fingers.” 

“You done yet?!” she said impatiently with her arms crossed.

*With a insanely large smile, i looked at her knowing i had saved the best for last. It was my favorite thing to pop. With a slight chuckle*

“Not yet” i said cooly

“Hmph.” she said disapointedly

*I turned my head sideways, Putting my chin 90 degrees to the left above my shoulder, she looked at me weirdly. I than snapped my chin to the other side. The sound sounded like a gun rapid firing as stopped pretty much at the same angle on the opposite side.*

“OH EW, EW” she said in horror

*i then slung my chin the other way, pretty much making the same sound on the return. it causes her to shiver and look away revolted* 

“DONT DO THAT!!! YOU’LL BREAK YOUR NECK LIKE THAT” she shouted at me

“ Maybe one day, but that doesn’t seem to be today~ tehe” i said back smiling.  

“Anyways, how long have you been standing there?” i inquired. 

*slowly she looks back at me slightly nervously* 

“enough to know you have a nice ass.” she said quietly

*I laughed*

“Trust me, your’s probably looks better” i said as I started walking back

*She looked up at me aggravatedly*

“Ok ok, no probably about it~ Though... i’ve never seen my own ass before.” i said holding my hand up slightly

*she rolled her eyes and smirked at me* 

“just shut up already and get inside”  she said turning around walking back into the cave. 

*by the time I got into the cave she was sitting on the bed of moss, still kinda grossed out i guessed. she had her ears down.* 

*I walked over to her, and sat down on the dirt next to the fire* 

*she sighed a heavy sigh, I cocked my head to the side as i looked at her* 

“whats up?” I looked at her confused

*she was looking at the ground at first, then looked at me like i was an idiot.*

“O-oh nothing, just a little.. hungry. thats all” she said looking back down to the floor.

*My ears shot up, I looked around for my fishing spear as i stood. She looked at me.* 

“whats up?” she asked concerned. 

“You’re hungry, I should go get you some food then..” I looked at her with the smile equivalent of a “cat face emoji” 

*her ears perked up* 

*i saw my spear sitting in the corner and walked over to it.  I Picked it up and turned around. her face seemed like it lit up, her ears and tail were strait up and her tail was swishing in anticipation* 

“C-could you get a couple rabbits? I know i said i was hungry but i did eat two fish last night, so you don’t have to rush or anything... But some rabbit does sound pretty good.” she said looking at me with different eyes. I closed my eyes and smiled a big smile. 

“you can count on me!” i replied holding up a paw with a thumbs up 

*i started making my way to the exit of the waterfall, when i herd her call out*

“Hey!”

* I turned around and looked at her*

“Yeah?”

“B-be careful out there” she said timidly

“ I will, you rest up and stay warm now you hear?” 

*she giggled* “Fine, whatever~” she said as she laid down on the bed of moss next to the slow burning fire.

*as i exited the cave i sniffled through my runny nose, and sneezed, then snorted slightly. Finding them by scent wasn’t going to work. Seems that my nose was still recovering from almost freezing to death. But rabbits live in holes they burrow into the ground. So if i find some bushes with berries on them, then they shouldn’t be too far away i guessed.*

* began thinking about berries. I’ve had some. I know i had. Where? thinking back as i was walking away that i realized that I had some not long after entering this dream realm.. which was like over an hour walk after climbing that waterfall the opposite way i was walking. *

*I walked a slightly longer route around the far side of the waterfall, it was less steep and had some small thinner trees ( though covered in ice) to help me climb the hill.*

*after climbing the edge i began following the creek, my breath was a visible cloud as climbed the frozen landscape*

*I remembered all these trees from when i first walked by. Their leaves had fallen, branches covered in snow and icicles. there was no sound of birds singing their song in the trees. I heard the crunching of the snow underpaw,  there wasn’t much really going on. I eventually found the snowcovered bush of red berries. I picked a few and tried to eat one. Frozen solid. I spit it out in fear of it lowering my body temperature. But i was now taking each step slowly, lightly, and quietly. I had my spear set and ready to cast.*

* in my mind i was already saying thanks. I was creeping around the higher bushes and low foliage. after a few minutes I heard the skittering of small paws in the underbrush. I squinted my eyes and looked at the shrubbery. it was moving. I cast it ahead of where was going. There was a squee from the landing. *

* i walked over and picked  the spear up. It was a fat fluffy cotton tail rabbit speared through the neck. I shuddered as i put the spear on my shoulder, rabbit hanging from the end. I slowly started making my back. I hadnt realised that my whole way back to this place was all up hill. which is easier to climb up than climb down during this extreme weather.*

* I ended up falling on my ass a couple of times as i tried to climb down the hills, but eventually i made it back to that small brook that leads to the creek. which meant i was close to the cave. It had been quite a few hours and the sun was starting to set, the rabbits fur was kinda soaked in blood and slightly torn from where it bounced around on the stick and got dropped a few times from my impact with the ground.* 

*eventually i made it down to the hill to the ponds base, i smirked at the remark that i didn’t just dive head first this time. I walked through the entrance and saw that she was curled up into a ball on the bed. her tail pretty much was a big as she was and she had covered herself up completely with it.  The fire was almost dead, so i walked over the bundle of sticks  that was wrapped up in vines and crouched beside it pulled out a claw. I heard a slight whimper come from her.*

*my ears folded down, she must be cold...  Looking back at the sticks i sliced the vines and they clattered slightly to the ground from its tight bundle. I saw from the corner of my eye that she jumped slightly from the sound. I saw her come from out under her tail and stretch across the moss bed. She laid on her side, looking at me with a big smile.*

“Glad to see you made it back” she said softly

*i blushed* 

“D-did you sleep well?” i said looking away adding sticks and leaves to the fire . 

“I slept fucking fantastically~” she said stretching even more so across the bed. 

*I looked sidelong at her as she did. when she stopped she looked me square the eyes, she looked like she was posing, like “paint me like one of your french girls”  which in all honesty, a painting wouldn’t have done her justice. i could feel my heart beating slightly in my ears as the leaves started catching fire, making me look at the fire starting to burn a nice level* 

*she got up smiling, and strutted over to the fire right next to me as i put more sticks into the fire, she put both hands on my shoulders and put her mouth near my ear * 

“Nice!, thats a fat one isnt it? hehe I can take over cooking it if you would like” she said messaging my shoulders, which she seemed like she was having a difficult time because of how wide they are. 

“You can relax and rest, i’ll wake you up when its done i promise...” she insisted 

“ok ok, plus i think you know what you’re doing compared to me so ill let the professional handle it” i said smartly

“Oh- such High praise from such a strong, brave, mighty hunter” she said back  dramatically. 

*we both laughed as she stopped massaging my shoulders, i moved my way over to the moss bed, which was VERY VERY warm from where she was sleeping and i snuggled in on my left side, watching her as she pulled out a claw.*

*I Slowly closed my eyes as heard her go to work, and drifted off*

[angustdtt]

“The Elevator” BTS Rapmon~Fic

Collage!Au | Tutor!Namjoon

Word Count: 3.4k Genre: Neutral/Fluff? Pairing: ReaderXRapMonster Triggers: None

Masterlist

The book dropped to the floor. Namjoon headbanged once again. He shook his head trying to elude his sleepiness. Lifting the book back from the floor of the lift returning to his reading, he yawned. Studying, tutoring and working were gonna be the death of him. It's been weeks since he didn’t had a proper night sleep or a free day from every duty he was suppose to do, and he needed one desperately. Giving up on reading for his coming exam he closed the book and put it away on his backpack. The lift opened it’s doors on a floor but no one was on the other side waiting for it, patiently and lost in his thoughts he waited for the doors to close again, the first face he thought of was her. Y/N. Today she didn't came for her tutoring classes in the morning, and after college schedule she didn't came to work, maybe she was feeling sick?. He wanted to know so badly what was wrong with her, and repressed his desperate need to message her asking not wanting to seem pitiful. ¿But what if she is the type of girl that wants to be inquired about what happened? ¿what if he looked like the kind of guy that just doesn't care instead of the cool facade he was trying to pull?¿what if she takes that the wrong way?¿as in, he is not interested?. All his hard work to get to be closer to her, to get her to feel comfortable around him lost. Should he ask his hyung advice again?. Namjoon mentally slapped his face. All this thought flashing in merely seconds, outside of the metal box he heard something, someone was screaming and then opening a door, presumably of one of the apartments on the floor, furiously. “Agh fuck you, you JERK!” a female voice he recognized, his heart jumped. The doors of the lift were closing as he reached out to stop them from closing another hand joined his. He froze. She bolted inside the elevator not even waiting for the doors to fully open, he knew she must have hit herself on the chest with the doors. Her face was red with rage little tears peeking from her big brown eyes. Namjoon felt bad, because he was watching her in distressed but mainly also because the only thing he could think of was the sweet smell of her perfume mixed with the scent of the shampoo she always wears,indeed he missed her a lot today. His heart was jumping all over his chest and flustered by her presence he hold his breath without realizing it. She haven't seen him, to his luck, cause he was just standing there like a fool looking at her, cheeks turning purple because he forgot how to breath. Y/N pressed the button to close the door quickly behind her and pushed the number of the floor she lived in. After this, she turned around to see who was the poor bastard that got caught up in the middle of drama. “Seonsaeng-nim…” she said, but sobbed a bit at the end, Holding back tears. His eyes were wide open. “Y/N…” he simply said breathing again, but looking at her with his eyes still weirdly wide open. “Sorry…” she said looking down. “Did I step on you or something? I'm sorry…” she wiped her tears away. Namjoon heart clenched. “No...why you ask?” he was stiff. “because your eyes are wide open in the freakiest way, they look like they gonna pop out of it’s sockets.” She licked her upper lip holding a faint smile, eyes red and teary. “Ah…” he looked on the reflexion of the elevator door, the ‘wacko’ vibes of his face with his eyes open wide looking at her were out of the charts, he mind-slapped himself again. “No, you didn't…” He coughed, blinking twice he traveled her face with his eyes  “Y/N…” Namjoon called. The girl looked at him, eyes red “Are you okay?, well...I know you are not...but I mean, what happened…?” The girl faint smile vaporized, her eyes looking sad again. “If I may ask…” he added. “You may not.” she answered bluntly, that caught Namjoon off guard, making him look down at the floor. “You got something to drink on your flat?” she continued. He rummage the flat mentally and remembered Jin left a bottle of some wine his parents got him, but since he wasn't and avid drinker he left it there accumulating dust. “Ah, yeah...I think I do.” “You may invite me a drink…” Y/N said looking straight to his eyes. “If you want…” she said softly. “Ah, sure…” Namjoon nodded arranging his bag filled with books and notes over his shoulder. Y/N pushed the button to close the door as soon as it arrived to her floor. So she was coming to his dorm?. Namjoon was tripping balls. He wasn't ready to invite a girl to his room, well...not this girl at least.

Did he leave his dirty underwear lying on the floor? Was his bed done? Was the room smelly? Oh no…..Did he put back on it’s secret place the “special” magaz-? But that didn't matter anymore cause the elevator doors opened again and Y/N was walking in front of him  heading towards the flat. He followed quickly and catches up getting ahead of her while the key from his pockets and opening the door. He casually stole a glance at her whole, and bite the inner of his cheeks. She was wearing bright high waisted denims that made contrast with her slender legs making them look soft and sparkly, ‘It's like 30 degrees outside Kim Namjoon,all girls wear shorts...hell you know if you could pull them off like that you’ll wear them too right?’ he told himself ‘But she is not ‘all girls’ you know’ he replied himself. ‘Aaaaah fuck you’ he counterattacked making him clench his nose in frustration. “Come on in” He gestured for her, Y/N walked inside sniffing the last remains of her crying. “It's pretty clean for a boy’s apartment.”she noticed looking around.”I’m use by now to seeing dirty clothes and boxers around.” pointed out snorting “Chim and Yoongi-Hyung are that messy?” he asked amused, trying to engage in some conversation to make her distract herself of whatever bad situation happened back there. “Let’s say I really didn't expected to know their dirty secrets as good as I do.” They both laughed. Namjoon walked to his room and Y/N followed shyly behind him. “Well at least you got your roommate,” Namjoon scratched his head trying to remember her name “you know as a relief…?” He asked dropping his bag over the bed. “Oh I also know her dirty secrets, so no…”  said, scrunching her nose “but we are best friends, so is a mutual thing.” she winked at him playful, while eying some books on the bookshelf next to the door. Y/N tiptoed to caress the spine of one of the top books. The baggy tee she wore fall down a little over her shoulder exposing the soft skin. He faintly could see the lace strap of her brassiere, but to his misfortune an audible ‘gasp’ came out of his mouth making Y/N turn around and catch his eyes locked on her. ‘C’mon,what are you 12? you get turned on on a bra strap?’ he told himself. Y/N eying his expression, she followed his gaze and chuckled when she realized what had happened. Once he realized this he changed the subject.

“Ahh, that’s a nice...shirt you got…” he moved casually towards the place where the wine was kept hidden. “Umm?, oh, yeah, twas a present” she looked down. ”It’s a big baggy but you know...It’s kind of a trend…” she arrange the clothing a bit around the belt but not her shoulder. “It suits you�� he mentioned, while grabbing the wine bottle and heading out to the kitchen to grab some cups for it, as he left the room she smiled. “It’s my design” She shouted for him to hear “my roommate got it from my scrap book.” She told as she sat down on Namjoon’s bed. “Lovely….it’s a nice present.” he grabbed two glasses from the small kitchen, then came back to sit on a chair next to his bed. “Oh, wine, fancy…” Y/N remarked. “Yeah, Jin-hyung’s parents gave it to him, but I don’t think he’ll mind since he is not that into drinking” Namjoon handed a glass to her, pouring the beverage on one of the glasses some of the droplets of wine landed over his t-shirt. “Ahh, shit” he exclaimed. “Lenguaje youngman” Y/N retorted. Namjoon chuckled, he handed the served drink to her. “Sorry Ma'am” he apologized.

“Gotta take that shirt off son, it's gonna stay stained if you don't water it know” pointed out Y/N “Ahh, ok I’ll be right back. Get comfortable…” Namjoon said leaving the room. Y/N giggled and sipped from her glass. “Maybe later” she whispered, smirking a little. Namjoon was on the bathroom wetting the stain when he realized he had forgotten to bring on a new t-shirt. Cursing himself, he closed his eyes letting out his chin. Unluckily for him there was no t-shirt laying around either, ‘maybe a towel?’ nah, it would look weird for him to just walk in with a towel covering his chest, it would prove no confidence But…Y/N was there, she would see him, ¿what if he falls when entering the room?. It wasn't the first time he tripped over nothing, often landing over Jin. And even after many years of knowing Jin he felt awkward because he would grab him and cope his butt. And there was definitely no way he was gonna let that happen. Not yet anyway. But, with a towel it was gonna look hella weird. ‘Fuck it’  Namjoon said mentally. ‘Let’s take this nice and easy’. Before leaving the bathroom he checked himself in the mirror gathering up mental strength and posing more manly, (or so he thought). Y/N was sitting in the bed still drinking slowly the wine (because she knew what wine did to her very well) when Namjoon entered the room. She was sipping a bit when she came to a full stop and eyed without shame the naked torso of Kim Namjoon. “Ah, sorry I forgot to bring a t-shirt…” said the youngman. “Wooo, seonsaeng-nim…I didn’t know this was an open invitation…” said Y/N being playful, (but also lowkey) “What?” Namjoon chuckled embarrassed searching for a t-shirt on his drawers. “You ask a girl to drink some wine, you ‘spill’ some on your shirt and you ‘forget’ to grab a new one, if I didn't know any better I’d said you are flirting with me seonsaeng-nim” pointed Y/N, crossing her legs and sipping elegantly from her wine glass again. Namjoon was on the edge, why was she being such a lil shit? Flirting with him like that?. It was messing up his mind. “Y/N, if I were flirting with you…”he chuckled shaking his head “What?...” she inquired. Namjoon was speaking out of nerves, he didn't have an actual response to that. Shit, shit.  He put on his t-shirt. “If...I were flirting with you…” begin him without losing his cool. ‘Quick, quick, think fast!’ “Aish” He pretended to be frustrated by grabbing his head “You look so beautiful …You make me forget my Pickup line!” he answered closing the drawer. Y/N laughed. “Smooth,” she recognized. Namjoon was sweating. “And lame…” added giggling. He scratched the back of his head and sat next to her. “You got me…” he shrugged rolling his eyes, grabbing his drink and swallowing almost the whole glass. “Wooow, I didn't have you for a drinker Kim Namjoon.” “At daylight, I'm a professional tutor and at nighttime, i'm still the same nerd guy...but with alcohol.” He shrugged smiling “Cheers to that!” Y/N raised her glass for a toast and he complied. “So,” he started. “You want to talk about earlier?.” asked casually. “Not really,”  she licked her lips from wine, looking down at the drink on her hands “It’s some guy who asked me to tutor him, I agreed and even got myself out of work and classes because he asked me like...desperate.” Y/N let out a sigh “Turns out he was a fucking jerk to me...but you know how it is, seems like you just gotta endure it.” she played with the glass on her hands and laugh sarcastically. “You should not endure it, you should punch that son of a bitch right on his face” Namjoon was upset.  “Oh I did, don't worry about it…” She assured “I may have a small frame but I can kick ass if i have to” she flexed her arm showing off her imaginary muscles. “Anyway, I don't really wanna talk about it.” she sipped on her drink. “¿How was your day?” “It was ok, I skipped a class to study for an exam I have in two days. Lunch, tutored, work, Yoongi yelling quietly at me, same old same old…” he laughed. “You must be the first guy I know that skips class to do more study.” she chuckled. “I shouldn't have skipped work though, Yoongi must be furious… and I left you alone to deal with him” “Ah, don't worry about it, Yoongi is particularly comprehensive with you, he wouldn't let me off the hook so easily”

“You think?” she asked. “Definitely...he has a soft spot for you” Y/N suddenly stopped talking and thought about those words. Namjoon was getting uncomfortable with the silence so he offered more wine “Ah, I really shouldn't, I do crazy stuff with two glasses on me” “If you get naked I promise not to look.” she looked straight into his eyes, raising one curious eyebrow. “Why you think I get naked when I'm drunk?” she inquired. Namjoon blushed. “I-I I— mean, is…-I don't know…I just—” he blabbered. “I’m teasing you.” Y/N hold her arm laughing softly. “No, I don't get naked when I'm drunk, sadly for you. Namjoon laughed. “But...I do stuff— that maybe I don't do when sober” she looked at the floor. “Like…” Namjoon asked laughing due to the third glass of wine on his system. “Like doing stuff I desperately want,”said her on a low voice. Namjoon turned to meet her eyes  “but I dont have the guts to… sober” she leaned a little over to namjoon’s side “Y/N—?” Namjoon gulped but maintain eye contact with her. She was not taking away her gaze from him, the silence was tangible. Namjoon’s heart was dropping to the floor with each second that passed, every word that was not spoken, he looked at her lips resisting the urge to lick his. Y/N did the same, their faces were so closed that the breathing of each other could be felt on the other’s face. The tension was at it’s maximum peak and Namjoon wasn't that strong, he was about to do something. Something he wanted to do for the longest of time, but she spoke. “Like wing-suiting…” she looked to the ceiling placing a finger over her lips. The tension was cut. Namjoon burst “OH MY GOD” he left the glass on the nightstand and rose to his feet violently “Why you always do that??!” the volume of his voice raising. “Seonsaeng-nim?” she asked,eyes wide as plates. “Why you always do that?” Namjoon repeated, grabbing his nose bridge. “Do?—Do what?” Y/N was nervous she never saw him like that. “THAT!, you tease me and then you cut the business out with some meaningless and off the topic line. WHY YOU DO IT?” “Personality trait? I DON'T KNOW!!” she screamed back. She got up on her feet as well.”AND I'M NOT TEASING!, not like you say anyway” she pouted.

“Then what it’s the deal!! Cause I swear I'm so confused, It's frustrating!” Namjoon looked at her, crouching a bit so he could see her in the eyes. She looked away But didn't say a word. “This is not fair Y/N…” He spoke “Not fair?!” She asked not looking. “No, If you are just being playful why you say stuff like ‘I didn’t know this was an open invitation’ “ he said mimicking her voice. “I was...I was just trying to be funny…” she said sitting again “If you are so upset about it I’ll stop, geez... you should’ve just say—” Namjoon interrupted her. “No...You are funny with the others, you don’t indirectly flirt with them...you don't say stuff like that to Yoongi or to Jin…” He noted “I do it with Sophia…” Y/N defended. “She is your friend, that doesnt count…” Namjoon replied. “You are my fr— “ she started but got interrupted. “DON’T….you know it's not like that…” Namjoon scratched his eyes. “I know it's not like that, hell I was so ready to take the first step and you—you...blocked me” “Namjoon?” Y/N gulped. “Tell me the truth….” He demanded. “Huh?” she was confused. “Tell me the truth, because…” he hesitated. “Im...Im…” he looked at her decided “I have feelings for you…. Y/N…” His voice got softer and quieter. “seonsaeng-nim?...” Y/N’s voice was almost a whisper. “Namjoon...please” he requested. “I like it when you say my name.” “Namjoon…” she said warmly. “Please, stop it with the facade, just...tell me the truth… cause I'm— I'm just...so…” the words got stuck on his tongue. “Y/N, I like you… over this past month's together, me tutoring you, I—I grown to like you… and to be honest” he chuckled. “This is not the confession I expected or planned, but...I mean… ugh.” he sighed, and lowered his gaze to the floor “I'm sorry for my outburst….I-understand if you just wanna go, I know it's the worst timing due to the day you had today, and you probably don't need me telling you this, I’m—I’m so sorry- and if you want to be tutored from now on by someone else I get it, I’ll ask the prefect…” “Namjoon…” she interrupted “I should be the one to say i'm sorry, to be honest I'm always so oblivious to things of this matter...I do want to be tutored by you still…” he lifted his gaze with half closed lids, looking at her, “and…” she grabbed his hand inviting him to sit next to her. “No more jokes, or indirect flirting…” she got closer to him. “I promise…” Namjoon lifted his hands and put softly one of each side of Y/N’s face holding her warmly, and looking at her lips, taking out of the away the hair that fell over her cheeks so he could see her whole blushed face, the silence again came, exchanging glances before namjoon closed the gap between their lips, Y/N grabbed onto his shirt bringing him closer and he obeyed, they both sighing into the perfect kiss, into the longed kiss. Namjoon heard her chuckled a bit ,softly, and he rejoiced over that sound bringing a smile to him as well. Not breaking the moment Y/N got herself up moving over his lap, and in sync Namjoon moved so he could give her more space. She was holding his cheeks now. He took advantage of this and traveled his hands to her back rubbing over her shoulder blades and going down to her hips and later to grab and squeeze her ass. The kiss was intensifying and they soon both run out of breath. “Remind me to call  my roommate” Y/N said, while taking a deep breath and pecking on his lips and his chin. “What are you gonna say?” he asked doing the same “She is gonna have to do me a favor and work covering my shift tomorrow...and you should ask someone too, because we are not leaving this room at all…” Y/N smiled. “Ok baby…” Namjoon said his voice dropping lower.

“Mmm…” Y/N hummed returning to kiss him, buckling on his hips when he moaned and growled into her lips whining. “What’s wrong?” She asked worrying, “Am I too messy?” “No...you are so fucking far away still…” At this Namjoon on a wink turned over the position him being on the top kissing her everywhere. Y/N laughed and got a tighter hold with her legs tangling to his hips.