#weiner anon

[real-total-drama-takes]

duncan had no right to pull that many girls looking like a bookmark that was burnt in a fire from eritrea forged from a lamp of the first spinsters basement

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[darby-rowe]

HELPP dally have you seen the tik tom trend that’s like “making him a sweet treat because he’s given me a few respectable weinerings lately” THEM!!

NO NO EXACTLY !!!!! THATS EXACTLY THEM !!!!

[sunsetsandsunshine]

Raph is nothing like Gretchen if I recall isn’t she the bully in that movie?

Sigh. Okay, in The Mean Girls musical there is a song Gretchen sings that is titled “What’s Wrong with me?”— and Raph LITERALLY says “What’s wrong with me” in the gif I reblogged. That is the only reason why I referenced her. Never said they were “like” each other, I just said “It’s giving Gretchen” because people would understand the reference.

[thepicklegifter]

winner anon, more like WEINER ANON-

sorry, sorry, ill shut up now-

HDJFKFKFLGH

no u right

[freshyweshypoo]

Do jpeg and zip like coloring books

THANK YOU FLR THE AAAAAAAAASSSSSSSKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!1!!!!!1!!!1!1!!!1!1!

[thevalicemultiverse]

You have a voicemail. "Weiiner, weeineer, weiner weinerweiner weiner" "Rachel!" "Great! Now he's gonna know it was me!

". . .I actually have no memory of meeting a 'Rachel,' so don't worry, your identity is still safe," Victor informs his phone with a slightly puzzled frown before deleting the voicemail.

[yandere-writer-momo]

Hi Momo, Deftones anon here, may I offer you a sorta unhinged idea?

A deftones song + baki man obsession birthed a scenario. The song Passenger is about road head. Imagine if two guys (one of them Katou) in a harem situation (who are down to the idea of sharing and seeing each other’s weiners) are in the car with afab reader who is driving. One is on their knees in the driver’s side giving them head and y/n is jacking the other off, and y/n has to keep from swerving or speeding while simulatenously stretching their legs to reach the gas and break pedals. They’re talkin real dirty to them too, switching from sweet to cruel. Keep in mind this is y/n’s first outing in a while since they’ve been kidnapped by the guys. If youre comfortable with it, if reader accidentally does something dangerous in their ecstacy, one of the guys burns them with cigarette ash and leans over to start biting their neck and ear real hard (really sensitive zones for them).

I think this would only work if one man was driving, the reader was giving him head, and then someone was kneeling in the passenger seat giving her head.

And we’re straying from the harem idea. This is just friends with bennies sort of situation. Both of these men want to date you but you can’t decide between them because you don’t want to hurt one of them.

So it’s Katou and Suedou.

Adult content! Minors Do Not Interact!

S&M, Road head, cucking, femdom, MFM threesome dynamic, and degradation!! Also burning a cigarette on a hand but that was consented!

🌶️ Yandere Baki Shorts: Passengers 🌶️

Atsushi Suedou and Kiyosumi Katou

Your hands tugged at Katou’s course and slightly greasy black hair as you grind your crotch into his mouth in frustration.

“Katou, you suck at this.” You laughed as you started to f*ck his face, the karateka whining as he tried to match your pace. “Just eat it like it’s ice cream.”

“You know I don’t know much about this.” Katou growled as he started to shove his tongue into your hole. Slurping noise echoing through the car as he started to suck on you like he was possessed. You threw your head back as a moan escaped your lips.

“That’s it… what a good boy you are.” Kaoru swatted away your hand when you tried to let him like a dog, a giggle escaping your lips. “You’re so attractive when you’re not talking.”

“Shut up.” Katou grumpled between licks and sucks.

“Please don’t neglect me…” Suedou whined as he fumbled with his pant buttons and zipper with one hand. The other steering the car as he drove the three of you back to his and Katou’s place.

“You’re so needy, Suedou.” You smiled as you helped slide his hard member out of his boxers. His tip was a swollen angry red and wet with so much precum. Poor baby was so pent up… “I didn’t mean to neglect you.”

Suedou bit his lip when you pressed a soft kiss to his tip. His whole body trembling when your soft hands slid up and down his length.

“S-stop teasing me…” Suedou muttered, only for a loud gasp to escape his lips when you latched onto him with your hot mouth. His fingers tightly gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white. “Fuck!”

Katou paused from his meal as he watched you bob your head up and down Suedou’s length, your hands rubbing where your mouth couldn’t reach. You were so hot… he couldn’t wait for his turn…

Suedou felt tears in the corner of his eyes as one of your hands fondles his balls. You were a succubus and you had him completely at your mercy… Suedou would let you do anything you wanted to him so long as you were touching him…

You smirked when you felt Suedou start to thrust in your mouth. You pulled away with an audible pop as you started to stroke him with your left hand. “Impatient aren’t we?”

You turned your gaze at Katou who stared at the two of you with half lidded eyes full of lust. What a little cuck he was.

“You’re too busy enjoying the show and not your meal.” Katou moans when your harshly yank his hair back with your right hand. “Open your mouth.”

Katou obeys as you spit into his mouth. “You’re a nasty little shit, aren’t you? Do you like the taste of your friend’s c*ck in your mouth?”

Katou swallowed as his body trembled. He loved when you took control… he’d take anything you gave him.

“You’re such a disgusting little freak. You’re so lucky I pay attention to you at all.” You shoved Katou’s face back towards your crotch. “Get back to it and maybe I’ll help you get off.”

Katou started eating you like a man possessed. He was determined to please you so you’d touch him too… he wanted you to touch him too.

You threw back your head as a loud moan left your lips. He was doing it exactly the way you wanted… Jesus.

Suedou gasped when you started to jerk him faster. Suedou nearly swerving into the other lane at the sensation but he decided to pull over and park in a parking lot to avoid an accident.

When Katou put a finger in you, you squirted all over him. Your left hand tightly gripping Suedou as he came all over himself at the same time. The two of you moaning and gasping as you came down from your high.

Katou looked up at you with a hopeful expression.

“Did I do good?” He whispered, only to melt when you gave him a smile.

“So good.” Katou gasped when your grabbed his hair and pulled his face up towards yours.

You shoved your tongue in his mouth, not minding your own taste in his mouth. Katou excitedly kissing you, his dark eyes rolling back in his head.

You shoved your left hand down Katou’s pants, using Suedou’s cum as lube to jerk Katou off.

You helped Katou take off his pants as his cock sprang free. You ran the tip up and down your slit before angling your body to give him easier access.

“I want your loser cock in me.” You whispered huskily in Katou’s ear. “Think you can do that?”

You didn’t need to tell Katou twice. He shoved himself in with one push and started trusting in and out do you like a mad man. The car rocking from the force of his thrusts.

You moaned loudly as Katou started drilling you into the seat. His hands holding your legs over his shoulders as his balls slapped against the fat of your ass.

Suedou whined at the sight. His member instantly hard again at the sight of you getting railed by Katou.

“Yes!” You cried as he hit all the right spots. “Keep going you fucking loser!”

Katou could already feel himself getting close. The Karateka pulling out as he came on your thighs. Katou leaned his head on your shoulder as he sighed in contentment.

You pulled a cigarette from your pocket and lit it. You took a long drag before sighing.

You turned your head to Suedou who was hard again. “Already? Damn you two are so needy.”

You glanced around for an ash tray but there wasn’t one. Suedou held out his hand for you.

You caught onto what he wanted. What a little masochist.

You stamped out the butt of your cigarette on his hand. Your eyes reveling in the euphoric look on his face.

“You’re both sick little perverts.” You used Katou’s shirt to wipe up the mess on your thighs with a sigh. “But you’re both mine.”

You were in for a long night…

[hunnieknight]

Wait, does “burung” actually have another meaning other than bird?? I’m Indonesian and this is the first I’ve heard of this— is it like a bahasa daerah thing or am I about to get my citizenship revoked—

Oh god, anon 😭😭/j

You have the purest childhood if your elementary school friends didn't make any penis joke using "burung".

It is often a sugarcoat word for it, like teaching your children about their private area. So i assume people never sugarcoat anything around you and just say "WEINER" Or penis 😭😭

[real-total-drama-takes]

all courtney needs is 1 new vape 2 lines of coke 3 drinks from a bar 4 more lines of coke five guys fries 6 hits of a blunt 7 more lines of coke

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[mychlapci]

Hi, earthstellar here on anon because I'm old and don't understand why Tumblr won't let me send asks using my sideblog, time to be hype for octo!Ratchet and Mer Shenanigans:

So, octopuses have specific deimatic behaviours-- essentially, threat displays -- with the physical capability to do some cephalopod-specific stuff like flaring tentacles, spraying ink, changing colours in complex patterns with chromatophores etc.

But octopuses also have very different Sexy Stuff happening compared to fish-- Like the hectocotylus, or the Weiner Tentacle. And spermatophores, and all that good shit. And infamously the really sad thing where they defend egg nests until they die. (But we're not here for sad shit, we're here for degenerate shit.)

MY POINT: With the whole Drift/Rodimus/Wing/Ratchet situation, it might not just be the facility staff who are confused by the whole mer mating situation.

If Ratchet is the only octomer, he might struggle with trying to explain his specific mating behaviours to his mates, and there might be somewhat of a communication issue. At least at first.

I imagine at some point he gets Into It and his hectocotylus shows up and the others don't know what it is so Drift or Rodimus (most likely to be impulsive) just licks it or something thinking it's just another tentacle and OHHHHH SHIT they think they hurt him or made him mad or something because his tentacles all flair out before contracting around whoever just licked it and this may or may not cause a brief (but sexy) panic

But when any of the others are carrying eggs etc., he easily puts on the most extensive deimatic behaviour displays because there's something uniquely terrifying about a giant octopus person who has a whole shitload of physical strength and prehensile dexterity in each one of their massive, heavy, long limbs being suddenly extremely defensive and angry for reasons that the staff can't yet figure out

Especially because Ratchet is kinda old as far as the staff is able to estimate and he's mostly well behaved and less prone to doing stupid shit compared to some of the others at the facility, he's not usually a problem, but now he is A Terrifyingly Large Problem and the staff is just like throwing food in the top of the tank and getting the fuck out of there before Ratchet's tentacles can lash up out of the water and fuck them up

They might be worried about the non-cephalopods in Ratchet's shared tank, thinking he might present a risk to them, but Drift, Rodimus, and Wing won't let any of the staff approach the tank either unless it's for food or water pH balancing because they are all extremely protective of each other -- Moving Ratchet becomes a non-option immediately. (Not that the staff has a problem with that, once it's clear they're all OK-- They're just happy they don't have to try to figure out a way to move a heavily sedated, very heavy octomer.)

But the staff freaks out pretty much the entire mating season because they can't figure out the specifics lmao, some days the entire tank is impossible to see through because Ratchet's inked it up entirely in an effort to hide his mates, which makes routine observation impossible etc.

And all of Ratchet's unique cephalopod mating behaviours and defensive threat displays are somehow EXTREMELY SEXY to his mates, despite the fact that they're not 100% sure of the exact meaning of some of it

(and also at one point Ratchet scared the shit out of them by having a "camouflage panic" because he suddenly realised that no his mates do not have chromatophores and therefore cannot hide themselves as efficiently and this means they are easily spotted by Enemies and this is Not Good so whoever's currently carrying the eggs spent several days getting constantly dragged into the shadows of the tank or peppered in sand/silt/small shells/etc. by Ratchet in an instinctively overwhelming desire to Hide The Carrier lmao)

This could also be a temporary dramatic issue where his mates don't know why he's not touching them etc. for a little while and it turns out it's because Ratchet can produce certain toxins like tetrodotoxin (the shit that makes blue ring octopi so dangerous) and for a few days there he just can't control it, he's effectively extremely venomous for a bit because it's an instinctive thing he does to make himself more dangerous in case any predators approach his mates during the peak of breeding season-- But his mates are fish so he could potentially hurt them too!!! Oh fuck!!!

but it's fine, he naturally breaks the toxin down after like a week and then they all have Extra Good Doin It Times because they couldn't bone for a whole week and that's unbearable during mating season lmao (which is good because his tentacles were extra vibrant during that week and everyone found it Very Hot)

Anyway I'm asexual, sorry if this isn't horny enough. I just appreciate the vibes. lmao

oh that’s good. Ratchet having different body language and instinctual responses since he’s an octopus-person and the rest of them are, with some species differences, fish, causing a few misunderstandings and also incredible sexy times. 

mhmmm i really like the thought of mating season coming in and Ratchet immediately secreting deadly toxins which wouldn’t hurt another octo-mer but would absolutely decimate his partners and now he’s completely cut off from them for a while, pretending he’s okay with listening to them fucking every night, as if his array wasn’t throbbing the entire time. His mates are then subject to an extremely horny octo-mer once the toxin breaks down and he can finally get some transfluid flowing between them...

Also consider... Ratchet, in his post-toxin frenzy, managing to knock up all three of his mates somehow. Now he’s the sole sire in the tank and it turns his threat displays from mildly creepy to the staff to absolutely-the-fuck-no. No one is to approach the tank. The guy who brings the food barely makes it in before he’s already running. Ratchet has to climb up on the little platform and grab the food for his mates because it’s usually left right there by the door. He has now turned from the older, docile mer who occasionally chats with the staff into a goddamn, eight-tentacled menace.

[cokowiii]

Not to mimic anon from 12 minutes ago but I also thought your name was a dick joke cause I read it as "cockowin" like cock 'o' ween (as in weiner)

That would’ve been funny as shit….why didn’t I think of this..

[pumpkinsy0]

Fluffy rainy day papercut hcs? If that makes sense LMAO

dw anon, i get what u mean, we like dis🤞🏽

•i think they both like 2 different types of outside when it rains, ponys more of the “sunshine peaking out through the trees, the leaves still have some raindrops on them, animals r out” type and curlys the “the storms rolling in, everything is closed, and the street lights r shining the pathways, its a lil foggy” type

•they both love summer rain, for literally every other type of rain theyd rather be inside to enjoy, but SUMMER RAIN???? let these bad boys outside,,,they r gnawing on the door handle begging to b freed

•they r NOT dancing in the rain, im sorry to everyone who thought they were, they dont mind getting wet, but the amount of water that would get on them if they were to do that would annoy tf outta them more than anything

•pony would b perfectly fine inside, he likes doing puzzles and drawing and shit like that, but curly HATESSSS feeling cooped up, he doesnt wanna b outside but he doesnt wanna b inside, help him pls

•neither of them carry a fucking umbrella, they use curlys leather jacket as coverage

•if they see a window w condensation u can bet ur bottom dollar theyre doodlin on that thing, ponys just drawing smiley faces and curlys drawing weiners over it

•theres this soc who has a rain drum in their garden, and curly saw that pony rlly liked the sound, so one day he just stole that thing and whips it out when it rains so him and pony could just listen to it, curly says its stupid but he cant stop looking at it

•curly loves looking at the lil snails and worms that pop out after it rains, he picks them up from the sidewalk and plops them on the leaves or some grass nearby, pony teases him for it a lil

•they both like the night time bc its quiet, its like they have the whole world to themselves, so if pony cant sleep, maybe they just go out for a drive

•pony writes poems when it rains and curly calls him ‘shakesqueer’😭😭

•ik once they got sick bc they were in the rain for too long and they were both arguing going “i told u we shoulda just went inside” “oh will u fuck off already” and they let out the wettest of coughs😭😭

•they both take their hair very seriously, if one of em even feels a DROP of rain they r booking it under the cover of some shops

[ballsballsbowls]

I didn't want to attach it to the post but i was sent the anorgasmia post by a mutual and i replied

"I never found the original post [after looking for an hour or so] so I don't know if anon had long-term issues with anorgasmia or if it was situational. Having had situational anorgasmia at a few points in my life, when it resolves itself you absolutely will find yourself saying YIPPEE and suchlike. Hooray my weiner works is absolutely the type of thing you would say once it starts working again."

[gummy-axolotl]

you fool youve turned anon back on

now i can send you the wildest most deranged thongs ever!

...

...

hehe

weiner

HA

There are dicks in the wall

That's fuckin hilarious

[warrior-cat-pride]

last night I dreamt there was a character named sneakers who was a weiner dog that appeared a single time in some novella and people kept asking u to make icons of them

IM SCREAMING?? thank u so much for ur dream anon. can we manifest sneakers into canon please

[porcelain-rob0t]

because its a funny word, i also think words like schlong, weiner, and grundle are funny

your association with words is not mine, thats on you to deal with your own issues

if you are bothered by "cooter carriers", consider "poontang possessor", "coochie clutcher" "snatch catcher" or any other combination of silly slang words

genital humor is the oldest kind of humor, come on catch up. human bodies are so weird it circles right back round to being funny. when you really take a step back, human body parts are really absurd, like the human vagina just makes no borax no glue slime as a cleaning method, thats fucking hilarious

theres ectoplasm what the heck lmao

(also if youre the same anon from the "female privilege" ask, dont be shy hop off anon 😃)