#wedding i can handle
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I want all of my friends to know that I love y'all so so much and I'm sorry I've been so bad at responding to DMs and stuff these past few weeks, I do not think that is going to improve for at least another few weeks because I am just so so busy and everything is so so so much and I am doing my best and I love all of you people in my phone and I will do my best to actually Talk to you all more and better in a few weeks when everything has slowed the fuck down and I'm no longer stressed to the point that it feels like my brain is leaking out of my ears.
#ramblings of an arrow#wedding on saturday#roadtripping and moving 1500 miles in a car prone to breaking down in 2 weeks#in the middle of work tests for a job I'm trying to apply for#don't know if I'm gonna get that job or if I'm wasting my time on these work tests#need to get a job b/c I spent over $3000 getting my car repaired last week#which WIPED out my savings that I spent the past few years trying to build up#right before getting married and moving me and my wife TO THE OTHER END OF THE COUNTRY#I'm sure everything will work itself out and be totally fine in the end#im sorry I swear I'm not trying to ignore anyone#everything is just so much right now and I'm holding it together as best I can#I keep getting mood whiplash from this job application/interview process#literally if I get this job I know that will fix all of my stress#because it's mostly financial stress#wedding i can handle#moving I can handle#it's being broke af and feeling responsible for me and my wife's wellbeing while not being able to financially provide for her#that fucks me up#ANYWAYS#im sure it'll all be fine#I just cannot exactly control my brain's stress response#I replayed all of dishonored the first one and got ghost and clean hands#because videogames help me cope with intense stress lol....#but now I've finished dishonored and dishonored 2 and hades and I'm just sitting here like aaaaaa#need new viddy game#brain wants so so bad to play BG3#I should probably just open one of the unplayed games I ACTUALLY OWN#maybe I'll see if Batty wants to watch me play Later Alligator#or if there's another game of mine she'd prefer I play#I don't know
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The League of Assassins hideout with the Lazarus Pit has been attacked, with many members suddenly going silent. Of course, this fact makes its way back to Batman.
When the Justice League arrives to figure out what is going on, they find a group of 'metas' throwing a party, all of them with cups filled with Lazarus Water.
As it turns out, the Lazarus Water is actually high quality ghost booze, and a group of specters has decided to set up the current Ghost King's wedding reception around the best source of it.
#dc x dp#dpxdc#dp x dc#dp x dc prompt#danny phantom#ghost booze#lazarus pit#everlasting trio#technically you can have Danny marrying whomever you want#but I kinda like everlasting trio#basically all of Danny's Rogues Gallery is there#if they aren't friendly with him then they are just there for the booze#the Lazarus pits was something specially put aside for occasions like this by one of the previous kings#it's not their fault humans can't handle ghost liquor#the Justice League is confused but some end up joining in on the party#Batman later convinces Danny to find a better place to store the liquor so stupid humans won't mess with it again#batman#weddings#ghost weddings
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why is polygamy not an option for Dick Grayson and im asking the writers, like he loves both Kory and Babs? I don’t see Kory and Babs being together but if they are ok with it Dick can be with both of them? Like he have a family in both the titans and gotham ?? Instead of this on and off with both that leaving everyone hanging let them be happy
#I know polygamy isn’t for everyone but i don’t think they discussed it?#Kory seems to be ok with the concept she is technically married to some other guy and Dick accepted it eventually#I wouldn’t say this is Dick wasn’t so upheld on monogamy that he looked like he was hiding something#Dick every two seconds: love should only be between TWO!#Like sir i know you grew up in the 80s but times are kinder now#Idk it annoys me this whole who is it and who is the end game let them be poly fix it#This is my headcanon now and they are doing it healthy and happy kory and babs share the love for Dick too and are besties#If you want them to date u can i just don’t know enough to judge if they would be into each others or not#Omg i forgot how kory handled the Revan dreams situation too it could work#In my head the whole Merage thing and rushed wedding never happened DC should retcon that#Or let kory kill merage then comfort her man idk#koryand'r#dick grayson#barbara gordon#batfam
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still not over how the way tom didn't go to logan's funeral because he was working was huge forshadowing for him becoming ceo. like roman cries and shows that he's actually human and boom. he's no longer in the running for the top job. but tom misses a funeral for work (something logan would absolutely do too), becoming the most inhumane of them all in that one moment, and it shows he can handle the job. he has basically become logan 2.0 with that decision and i think that's so wild
#this is in no way me calling tom inhuman in general i'm just saying#like that was his father-in-law and he didn't attened the funeral because he was working. he put work first#it's a HUGE parallel to logan missing connor's wedding#and in that moment that's when we see that tom can handle the pressures of this job. he can become the corporate shell of a man logan needed#idk i just have many thoughts still#succession#tom wambsgans#roman roy#logan roy
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i dont think anyone should have to put themselves through it but it is interesting to me how some other “disabled” people just decide they cannot work before even actually trying because its uncomfortable or makes them anxious and its an active choice they are actually able to make which they see zero privilege in when talking to those of us who will always have to work no matter what… and then theyll talk to you like “oh you dont understand i just cant” while you literally experience the exact same shit or more 😭
#best example is shitty cali roommate who had three separate jobs including one i helped them get hired at and then they just decided they#couldnt handle it so it was fine to let everything fall on me and their wife with a heart condition while they sat on their ass playing#jewelry on etsy. and then theyd have the gall to be like well im mentally ill and disabled as if we werent too#also it was so obvious thats why they upcharged my rent when my only other option was homelessness they saw a situation they could take#advantage of parasitic ass person. the wife was not great either but after seeing how their wife treated her i really hope they divorce(d)#also jobless roommate was constantly making comments on what i did with my money too like they literally were mad at me for buying a $5#t shirt from walmart once#and then theyd act surprised they had no irl friends after shit talking every single person they invited to their wedding party#this isnt about them tho this is about random posts i see on here and think. you can actually get yourself out of this one man. just try
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Expressing a sentiment that upsets us sometimes (👑 had to deal with it a lot and seems to be the main one who struggles with it)
Man it is so annoying to have thoughts and want to say something and like RESPOND to people naturally, but GOD why is it so difficult to physically make the body do it, either verbally or digitally/through text? Like I'm supposed to be in front, right? So tell me WHY-
(He just wants to be able to be smooth and chill with these randos online but either there is no way to force the words out or the mind just. Blanks. And thus there is nothing TO say (if there was to begin with sometimes) -,_-,)
#sepiasys.txt#Admittedly I'm pretty sure there's like. a secondary thought at all times going 'not necessary'; just deciding nah u dont need to speak bud#Yes there are atleast 3 possible answers I can come up with on the spot for why this happens; no I dont know what it would be specifically#and no I am not sharing because I'm sca-wed. And dumb. and this is probably also part of why we dont speak our mind-#[Cannot handle being wrong or making mistakes] yeah thats probably it.#scheduled for funsies <3
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Post-vacation anhedonia has me dissociating at work wishing I was flat on my couch with THC flooding my veins and a brain full of beautiful words to finish this fic.
#dopamine severely depleted#I’m so over this job#(not the counseling I love doing that but the job I’m holding onto for health insurance because we are only civil unioned and not married)#(so we need our own health insurance which is BS)#just wanna pop out another kiddo and so I can blow this pop stand#have a real wedding the way we want to but how do people even afford that#and just start working like 20 hours a week because I swear that’s all my brain can handle#I just want to be home with my kid and wife and see my clients when it’s convenient for all of us#and time to write and read and do things I enjoy instead of feeling like I need to vegetate after a long workday to be somewhat human again#not snz#just bitching life is really good and I shouldn’t be complaining
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#negativity cw#mother mention cw#I’ve been in a funk since visiting my parents this weekend#And my mom ranted about my dad and her potential plans for divorce#It’s not the only reason I’m upset#I’ve got feelings about my job performance and my social life which aren’t helping#But being reminded of their marital woes feels like it’s brought everything else up#Half of me wants to ask my mom to not bring it up again#Which I know is a reasonable boundary to ask#But I’m afraid of the repercussions#She’ll respect it#But she’ll respect me less#Which should be okay since I’m an adult#But my mom is my closest confidante (which goes back to the friends thing)#I don’t have too many close friends irl#And even if that weren’t the case#I don’t want to poison the well#ugh#I really really really wish she hadn’t told me#She talked about how she’s glad in this country you can ‘take a man to the cleaners’#And she’s keeping her cards close to her chest so he doesn’t ‘hide the money’#And I know his behavior and inaction are largely responsible for the breakdown of the marriage#But now I feel like I’m betraying him by keeping quiet about it#And I can’t tell my dad because I don’t know if he would keep it to himself if push comes to shove#And it would nuke my relationship with my mom from external orbit#I have to spend Wed evening and Thurs with my parents#And I’m thinking of telling her tonight I don’t want to hear any more about it#We’ll have to see how it goes#But I can’t handle this tension#if she wants to vent about it she can talk to her friends or a therapist or a lawyer or whatever
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my opinion, like many in the fandom, is that Buck has always been a little bi coded, and I think handling it like the way abc handled Rosa Diaz being bi, by simply having Buck drop some information he’s always known about himself but never been comfortable sharing, would be a decent way of handling it. for one thing, having both buck and eddie go through a gay panic thing would be a lot for one season, and maybe a bit repetitive, and I think it would be perfectly in character, while adding a really lovely layer to Maddie & Buck’s relationship, that Maddie has always known Buck was bisexual, and has attempted (maybe awkwardly) over the years to get Buck to be more comfortable with it. I also think it would add a really wonderful layer to Buck and Chim’s relationship (again, to make the b99 comparison bc this is a textbook “if i had a nickel for every time a beloved, diverse show involving police officers got canceled by fox and picked up by ABC bc beloved diverse shows with a really active fan base are their bread and butter i’d have two nickels” situation lol), the same way it was a natural & moving way to have the first person Rosa came out to be Charles, if Chim finds out because Buck needs to talk to Maddie about how he and Eddie had a stress induced make out on Eddie’s couch and then Eddie had a panic attack over being gay, and Chim is there trying to connect the dots of this conversation & be supportive bc Buck is anxiously mumbling while bear hugging Jee in his kitchen. And “Buck has been bisexual the entire time” leaking out to the rest of the 118 has a lot of potential; we know they’re all gossipy & nosy about each other, and Chim is terrible at keeping important secrets, so Hen & Bobby piecing it together from Buck‘s sudden interest in LA Gay Culture & Chim’s nervous stuttering, while Ravi is like “happy that you’re comfortable enough to come out to me Buck but again, i do not need to know this much detail about your personal life” all of this just seems like a very natural, easy way of getting Buck to come out.
and that leaves the Gay Panic storyline to Eddie, lmao. because whether they decide to go with the common fandom idea of “eddie is gay but due to being a really macho dude from Texas, born into a family of very typically ‘we will always love you no matter if you’re straight or choose to be gay’ esque family, has been heavy repressing it all these years” or they decide to make him bisexual, it’s clear that Eddie’s continued wild misses at dating women, panic attacks over the idea of being with a woman, and naming another man as the caretaker of his child in case he dies, that Eddie is primed to have an absolute break down if he ever comes out. Is it very similar to Carlos’ story? Yeah, obviously, but they’re incredibly different people, and more than that, the type of family they come from is incredibly common in this day and age, and whereas we’ve seen the fallout of all the shame that comes with feeling like your parents love isn’t unconditional wrt Carlos, we never saw the initial, badly handled coming out that prompted this break in the Reyes family, and we would be seeing that with Eddie and the Diaz family! not only that, but we have Hen & Toni there to help Eddie (and his parents & pepa & abuelita) through it, to help them handle what are bound to be difficult conversations on Eddie’s history of dating women his family will like that he has minimal interest in, and what happens now that Eddie is once again testing the unconditional aspect of his family’s love.
And that’s not even touching The Bobby And Athena Of It All, from Bobby once again relating to Eddie’s struggles of “what do you do when you feel like the core of who you are has shifted and everyone else is standing still” to Athena having intimate knowledge of the effect of coming out late in life, after you’ve lived a whole life as an ostensibly heterosexual man. We could get a really touching scene between Bobby & Athena and Buck, discussing how this is something he’s always known but it’s just been easier to let it go unsaid even if he knew Bobby and the rest of the 118 would be loving and supportive if he ever came out. Imagine the jokes re: Buck, Eddie, AND Hen being the messiest gays in LA while Ravi is begging them to Say Less.
I think the storyline potential of “Buck and Eddie impulsively make out after a stressful call in ep 1 and then skirt around their feelings for at least half a season” can be really rich, and also kind of in line for how abc has handled a character who got popular for being bi coded, and I’m not saying i trust them to not be cowards about it, but I am saying they shouldn’t be cowards about it.
#rani makes text posts no one will read#buddie#118#firefam#like i won’t say jake was ever queer textually but i do think abc let them lean into it a lot and i did appreciate that. and while i wish#that eleanor had said the words ‘i am bisexual’ out loud once again i can appreciate them consistently highlighting her attraction to women#AND letting tahani end up single instead of shoehorning in a male love interest. as well as the climax of jason/janet’s story being hit he#‘let’s go get our girl’ ‘not a girl’ moment. and however i thought the first two abc seasons of b99 sucked they always handled rosa & ray#wonderfully!!!! they literally gave us kevin & ray falling back in love and having a wedding!!! they’re capable of not being cowards!#unlike fox who put a woman who clearly dislikes eddie & the concept of found families in charge of the show 💀💀#911#rani attempts meta#this goes in that tag bc it’s long and speculative
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At one point between runs at agility Forte started staring at me very intensely. I didn't think much of it because being stared at is something that one gets used to when one has herding dogs.
But this staring was apparently more intense than normal as it caught the attention of a classmate. She leaned over and asked if I had cheese because he was staring holes into me. I started to answer that he knows I do, it's what I reward him with in agility. But before I could finish he firmly alerted me. I checked my Fitbit and my HR was at 111. He was right so I rewarded him but it's curious to me because I hadn't just finished a run and felt fine. So not sure why it was that high. Regardless after I acknowledged his alert he climbed into my lap, as much as he could, and did DPT.
Forte is pretty good about tasking when he's working and when we're just at the house. But he's really getting good at alerting for more subtle things even off duty.
Coincidentally our run after that was the cleanest we've ever had. I didn't get lost at all on the course and remembered where my planned cross was enough to be smoothly ahead of him, which is a rarity. He didn't miss a single obstacle or stray off course and nailed all his contacts.
I'm really impressed with how he's maturing and the dog he has become - as a service dog, as an agility dog, and just as himself.
We've got a big event this weekend and if he performs as well there as he has been it might be time to take off the in training patches and promote him to full SD
#dogblr#forte#belgian tervuren#service dog in training#psychiatric service dog#sdit#dog agility#kind of concerned about the hr spike#normally it comes alongside things i can understand#but if some intense brain fog or some such was coming he totally cut it off at the pass#i didn't realize how much the reactivity bout set me back in terms of confidence with him#but he's been on his a game lately#i did chicken out of asking my cousin for accomodations for forte at the wedding at the end of the month#I'm just planning to leave the reception early#but now i regret not asking because i think he can handle it#we'll see how this weekend goes though#it won't change the wedding plans but it would give me confidence to ask for future events
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young man with a horn - dorothy baker
[alt]
#dorothy baker#quotable#young man with a horn#if you click the link you can read the nyrb classics edition for FREE on the internet archive. it has an excellent afterword#anyway this book is not as great as cassandra at the wedding (obvs) but it's still so impressive#tho i think the most impressive aspect is how she handles rick & smoke bc it's a relationship operating on 0 ego % 100% vulnerability#like 'this was the first time he'd ever handled any tenderness directly' what the FUCK#and then smoke calls rick 'baby' twice one of which is on his deathbed? men are insane! i'm obsessed!#this book is textually queer (see rick's canonically gay-ass wife) but not in the way i'm making it out to be#but you do get a hand in unlovable hand fagdyke failmarriage so it's a win-win!!
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the only thing I'm going to do in January is gif and read I've had way to much to think about all November and December and I'm so tired of it
#Twi irl#It's so busy at work I'm coming in early and leaving late and I'm happy cause the paychecks gonna be awesome but wow I'm tired#Next week I have an extra long weekend off for Christmas!! Then con will be over and I can relax as long as I've figured out what to wear t#my cousins wedding#the stress is getting to me 😭#No new cosplays for the holiday season again I can't handle it
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got hit with a water bill twice the amount it usually is for december (: (: (: ughhh
#we can handle it it’s just tight with december and wedding saving too ughhhg#nat.txt#finances ///#gotta power through my current comms so i can reopen them earlier in the year next year#(obviously with no sacrifice in quality 😤 i hope)#my period hit today too which SUCKS
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Idk what ur talking abt forkifold is literally canon I was on the stream where they got married /j
#unreality#in my HEAD theyre canonically married 💔#manifork#forkifold#(implied)#imo shes a silver jewlery type so thats how i imagine their rings#wedding rings are such an evilly cute concept. always carrying a part of each other#hers wrapped around her. his always being held in his hand by nature of being on it. its as if hes always holding her and shes always holdi#ng him even when theyre apart.#forkifold makes me wanna nonbinary jack truth because they r tender lesbians. butch jack can be real if you let him in your heart#objects with varied texture are so special to me so manifork with gems embedded and a leather grip wrapped around her handle is swag#i ❤️ objects i ❤️ cargoships i ❤️ jack manifold the invention of forkifold was a vital service to the Me community#whos the man! - art tag
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This au twists in very pleasing ways, but! I think I found the solution to additive less medication!
So, the scientists (and medics). Where do they get their medical supplies? If so, what stops them from taking this massive discovery and concern to whoever the fuck is still producing Cybertronian medical supplies because from what I'm seeing there's still unaffiliated mecha out there among the stars.
#tfp au#thinking#there's also the fact that it would probably be relatively easy for them to try and synthesize the meds themselves#but then that would be a scale issue#sounds like a road trip with Wheeljack and three medics is in order#well i call it a road trip but in reality it's a space trip#hmm as far as on board space goes this might be where we also involve Swindle and hos spacecraft#plus his affinity for the intergalactic markets as a savvy businessman#Shockwave can stay home he's good enough at doing medic stuff to handle things while they're away#oh naturally these events would take place after the Tarn and Fallen fiasko but before the war over party slash surprise weddings
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#ooof#i may be a jack of all trades of something lmao#hopefully i can fix my cousins leaking shower faucet#im guessing its the cartridge since the knob cant turn it off anymore maybe the rubber gasket finally wore out#going to need to buy soem waterproof silicone grease for the o rings to lubricate the new cartridges o rings before installing#got me the core puller since i dont want to break the inner part of the old cartridge#then wed need a real professional LMAO with the tools to take the broken stem out#so hopefully im able to take out the old stem safely#and then go to home Depot and find the same cartridge#installing it is the easy part taking it out is the hard part#turn off main water#pop off the top of the handle unscrew it from the stem#pop off the handle#then the metal tube#take out the tab holding the cartridge in place#then safely and slowly use the core puller to take out the old cartridge#after taking it out inspect for brand or any numbers if none go to home Depot and look through there catalog#then simply push the new cartridge in making sure to keep the moon side down so the water is off and not on the on position#then turn the water on before or after putting on the handle to see if the cartridge is facing the right way#so the water comes out cold then hot#hopefully it goes well and i fix there water#they spent 600 dollars on water cause of the leaking tub#im definitely going to have to get paid for this one if im able to fix it LMAO the parts are not cheap#knowing my cousins they'll probably just buy me something to eat and try to play it off as payment but not today 😂#will see on Friday when the core puller comes and ill just go to the plumbers store for the water proof grease/lubricant#ill update My Internet diary on Saturday LMAO 🤣#i honestly need yo start writing in my journal again im so inconsistent its my worst traits rn
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