#weak ahh line art

[creepy-hornets]

Back wit a Quick COF drawing :p +hello kitty Simon ver

[sleeplesssmoll]

I think Vertin might be a tactile person.

Here are examples taken from the voice lines and context clues.  This isn't an all conclusive list of touchy interactions, just what I could find. Someone stop her before she gets hurt. Update: I'm going to keep adding on as we find more interactions together because this is really fun.

Sotheby (hat and hair): Stop it! You can't just touch an adult's head! (She is 13. Vertin probably sees her as a baby and pat her head).

Bette (hands): Ha ha ... They might be a little rough. To tightly grab the eave does require abundant practice. (assuming Vertin is holding her hand. Don’t ask me how we got here.)

Rabies (clothing and torso): Straws ... be hugged. Rabies ... feels it. (she hugged him 🥹)

A Knight (hat and hair): One step further, and you will be in close contact with Someone's nose... As long as you can hit Someone's head. (how close is Vertin standing to the AK? Or maybe she was looking for an invisible head to pat.)

Mesmer Jr (Hands) :Compared to the incurable anxiety, these wounds are minor. Oh, watch your distance. (smh Vertin not everyone likes being touched.)

Melania (hat and hair): "Well done. Please keep on." ...Aren't you going to say that? (more headpats but Melania needs vocal praise too.)

Lilya

Clothing and torso:  Feel awesome? Now it's my turn to pet you. (...what is Vertin petting? This is clothing and torso but I'm lost.)

Hat and hair: You should be grateful that I am too lazy to move now. Or you should know that the first-class pilot’s got a first-glass head-butt, too. (Vertin taking advantage of the moment to give headpats. I'm telling you, its a THING)

Leilani (Hands): Shaka brah! Ooh! Do you want a handshake or a high-five, my friend? I'm fine with either! (She’s so wholesome)

Cristallo 

hat and hair: Are you patting my head? The doctor says, this is a reward for good children. Have I done something right? 

Hands and sleeves: Would you like to hold my hands? I could be with you anytime. (Cristallo is weak and frail. The nurses say she could be blown away by a gust of wind. Despite this she says she’ll be with Vertin anytime. To me it reads as Vertin being worried Cristallo will disappear too. Cristallo notices so she offers to hold hands and says she will always be here as a way to comfort her.)

Darley Clatter

Hat and Hair:  Oh ... I can't deny you are really good at patting.

Clothing and Torso: Take a look at my beautiful muscles! I don't need to explain how fabulous I am. Hey, watch out! Rub me in the direction my mane grows.

Bonus Intimacy : Adorable? Ahh? You don't even have a taste! (Vertin pets him and calls him adorable. Darley, don’t let the girlies know. They might end your noble bloodline.)

Pavia (Hat and Hair): Wanna know how many holes I've made on others' heads? No? Then stop it. (What possessed her to give Pavia headpats?)

Dikke (hat and hair): Thou art overstepping my boundaries, arcanist. (I’m guessing Vertin is at it again with the headpats. Dikke smiles when she says this so she isn’t offended. If anything, she seems amused. )

Eternity (hands and sleeves): Go on, try holding it, and feel its temperature rising in your hand… Easy, sweetheart… take it easy, heh heh… (more hand holding but Vertin wasn’t prepared this time)

An-an Lee (hands and sleeves): What? You want a palm reading? (Vertin, why are you like this? Are you randomly touching people's hands?)

Regulus (hands and sleeves): What do you want? I don't have any spare scratch. (I'm sure she knows you're broke since she's your boss. Vertin's just being Vertin at this point.)

Vertin leads Regulus by the hand into her Suitcase in the prologue

Blonney (hands): Interesting! It's been a while since I last met someone who would start with holding hands.

She also holds Blonney's hand as she calms her down during the green lake event.

I feel like I should have picked up on this sooner. Gift-giving, hand holding, and headpats. This is the Timekeeper way.

[residentialsinyomakai]

Obligatory refs + Info of my Yokai Watch Ocs (*＾▽＾*)

Under a cut because there's gonna be a lot of yapping and art stuffs....explodes +□+

Caspian Hernandez || Any Prns || Watcholder

Basics:

The 15 year old 'basically Nate replacement' of this universe!

Lives in Blossom Heights mostly alone, parents are gone pretty often for one reason or another.

In addition, she lives with Baddinyan who is the only reason they're always out of Chocobars

Can see yokai through their glasses (ability can't be deactivated, but he has to focus on yokai for a few seconds in order to actually see/identify them)

Summons them w/ the Yopple-Brand summon band :'] (Customizable! That's why it looks like a disc attached to a Brute Bracer; because it basically is.) Insert disc into a slot in the side!! Whoopie!!!

Not very socially aware due to doing online school up until the age of like 12 (EVIL CAT interactions early on are constantly like 'lol that thing they said actually meant this you dork ahah you fool' 'hush weirdo I'm trying to focus')

((^ i mean in addition to that hes also based on me so like. Neurodivergent canon?? Maybe?? Idk i unintentionslly write characters like me sometimes

A bit goofy and switches moods easily. Some days can be pretty apathetic if she's in a slump.

Gameverse Friend Team of 6: Baddinyan (duh), Badude, Casanuva, Babblong, Tut'n'K'mon, and Rawry

VC: Unbearaboy! from the 'Yo-Kai Watch!' Sub (the blue one in this scene) ((yes I know it's goofy but it's the only clip I could find, skip past the beginning flashback 😭));

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Kerosque || He/Him || Formerly-Alive Yokai

Basics:

Water-Attributed Rank-B yokai of the Tough Tribe

Phrog is about in his upper 40's.

Inspirit; is kinda like when people tend to be kinda cold/curt in the mornings for seemingly no reason.

Runs a ramen stand someplace on the outskirts of Yo-kailafornia. (He's a pretty good chef too)

((He also has little custom pins you can get for free depending on who you are ^u^ a few of his customers/friends tend to.))

Uses his ladle (however you spell it) as a bit of a weapon thing. Comically large goofy ahh 😭

Doesnt go to the human world more often than he needs to. Too much everything

This man HATES stepping foot in downtown he does NOT wanna be there ever-

Kinda perpetually grumpy, resting mildly angry face. He tries to be polite but isn't very talkative at all lol

He does in fact croak. I love frog

Not pictured cause I forgot but like. Has a little swirly stomach pattern

Reoccurring yokai at his stand tend to be: Roughraff, Sick-Kun, Quinn, Ebi, Caspian, Master Oden, and occasionally Bruff.

VC: No clue yet, something along the lines of a higher version of Walrus Captain from A hat In Time, or a less enthusiastic Captain Caviar from Cookie Run? (If you got ideas, feel free!)

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Dread || He/They/Xe || Human-Born Yokai

Basics:

Drain-Attributed Rank-S yokai of the Shady Tribe

Inspirit; kinda similar to intrusive thoughs. Worse case scenario stuff, things that make you think you're an awful person, dreading situations or overthinking anything, etc etc

Is sighted quite a bit around high-schools. Hormones+anxiety+prime place for embarassment? Makes his job too easy

He has low empathy, but isn't completely incapable. Doesn't make a lot of friends and honestly he could care less either way.

Rather flippant, dry humor kinda guy, kinda similar to Jax from tadc for reference

He does have hair under there (i thought thatd be obvious but then again you'd probably also expect him to have skin and a chest/stomach under his hoodie so aifkwod), but it's usually kinda greasy.

Heart is a weak point in battle. If he ever let's it be exposed in the first place, that is

Cannot be seen by Caspian earlier in the story. Around the point I'd expect him to be in most of my drawings, he's at 'watch' Rank-B

Likes to taunt people, the easier to provoke the better. He feeds off of negative reactions and emotions for both entertainment and soul food nom nom

Usually a sad reaction is better than an angry one for him. If he finds someone's emotional weakness he most likely Will Exploit it XnX

While he doesn't care for anyone, he tends to harass Fuwhirl and Negatibuzz the least.

VC: Dont kill me but Raggedy Andy from Raggedy Anne's Musical Adventure

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Swiss || He/Him || Human-Born Yokai

Basics:

Electic-Attributed Rank-C yokai of the Eerie Tribe

Inspirit; is why people (usually kids) are picky eaters. This can look like randomly losing an appetite/ just finding several things repulsive/I'm bald/nuance/ref

Wanders around wherever. Lives in one of the Tranquility Apartments officially tho.

(Fuwhirl lives w him after they reunite <333 long story short they know him)

Has pretty poor eating habits himself tbh

Is edible!! Technically!!! He would not reccomend it (he's cake roll flavored :'])

The swirl in his hair can be dyed different colors.)

Going off of that, he can regenerate. Useful, but kiiiinda painful

He's a bit of an a-hole, and absolutely doesn't know when to shut up. He doesn't like to fight tho surprisingly (°>°)

Sarcastic and quick to snap back at someone =u=

(There's a strange old man he helps with experiments concerning his odd biology....he hasn't been posted yet but he belongs to my friend @sketchdeath22)

VC: lol idk

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Fuwhirl || They/Them || Object-Born Yokai

Basics:

Wind-Attributed Rank-D yokai of the Mysterious Tribe

Inspirit; Makes people dizzy either randomly or after standing up ×□×

Lived at a circus for a while, but eventually it moved out of town. After a bit of aimless wandering they found their way to Blossom Heights 🌸!!!

Kinda stumbles when they walk, it's worse when they're distressed but a bit more easy to navigate when they're happier &u&

Naive, likes to think anyone's nice under the surface +▽+

Is kinda like Tattletell's in the way he had to be latched on to you to be effective. Typically via a backpack

Has one of those build-a-bear hearts inside him!!! Whoopie :)

VC: Uhhh I forgot atm but I will come back and edit lol

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Anyways, that's not including my like 'ocified versions of pre-existing characters' agsgydirofor I love yapping about ocs!!! Wahoo :)

[emmalovesfitzloved]

Last question, who are your fav downwolders and why?

Ahh… well it has to be….

The one….

The only….

💫Magnus Bane! 🥂

(Art credit: @cassandrajean )

Queue the music!

Now. Reasons reasons reasons. Where to begin.

I took my time thinking about this question bc there are quite a few downworlders I have an affinity to. But the showdown where it was REALLY hard to pick one or the other was the battle of the warlocks…

Tessa or Magnus.

On the one hand, I love Tessa So much (wrote a piece on why you can find here hehe) and I truly think she is a timeless character (well before she became literally timeless ie. immortal) and her influence throughout the shadowhunter world is iconic, relevant and enduring.

(Art credit: @giannyfili )

However… her choices and inner narrative became a bit clumsy dealt with and a bit inconsistent unlike Magnus’s, as the shadowhunter novels went on. Of course, characters are allowed to change, grow, develop at any age, but her character felt slightly manipulated in the writing? All for the sake of peddling the plot. Not to get TOO into the whole herongraystairs touchy topic but I do think as I’ve grown up and done over a handful of rereads I do spot the slight manipulation that started then, which kind of set a precedence in her character throughout. I adore Jem but he as well was felt a bit clumsily. Topic for another time.

Meanwhile Magnus, while through his own self discoveries and through his own immortalities feels more cleaner in plot. He’s necessary, vibrant, witty and is that character that you ALWAYS look forward to reading. He is That character that just lights up a room and you wait with baited breath on what he’s going to say next. His air of lightness that he brings into every interaction makes you be able to read and listen to him all day long. With long promises made of laughter, sage advice, experience, history and adventure.

“I've got a stele we can use. Who wants to do me?""A regrettable choice of words," muttered Magnus (City of Ashes).

And because of this, when he is being serious, his words strike you when you least expect it and leave you stunned.

“You endure what is unbearable, and you bear it. That is All” (Clockwork Princess).

His bisexuality was handled wonderfully, and was truly one of the first stories I think our generation read where the sexual identity wasn’t about coming out but already at the stage of acceptance and fun loving. He remains respectful and doesn’t want Alec to rush out of the closet but rather does the best thing- inspire Alec to be the best version of himself in life which is finite. That’s the best thing a partner can really do for you.

However he isn’t a Mary Sue bc in every series he stars in the reader sees his vulnerabilities in pure daylight. And also has a plot line that challenges his Yodha immortal dogmas. Will being one weakness of his in TID, Camille and how she mistreated him and being alone in a very sad world. I don’t think these topics were explored nearly as well with Tessa.

“You left me. You made a pet out of me, and then you left me. If love were food, I would have starved on the bones you gave me” (City of Fallen Angels).

And of course, his relationship and development with Alec is my top 3 relationships in all the shadowhunter world. It felt natural, wonderful, sizzling, exciting and steadfast. Didn’t feel too young or naive like I sometimes feel when reading Clace, but new enough to feel like the honeymoon will never end. And I think in part it’s because of Magnus bringing out the best in people, and how Alec chose him. Of all the people Magnus helps out, he actually doesn’t really ask much in return. But for once Alec did a double take on him and let Magnus take the reins of where their relationship will lead them. With great readership payoff 🥹💍

“You could give me the past,“ he said a little sadly. “But Alec is my future” (City of Fallen Angels).

(Art credit: kasirose)

In fact, he has SO much to offer we got standalones, his own mini series with his partner and constant features in further novellas stories. There is no other character in the Shadowhunter chronicles who has been that centre stage as him. And he deserves all of it.

Favourite Swiftie songs that r HIS:

• BEJEWELED

• Begin Again

• Welcome to New York

• You’re in Love

• Karma

• You’re Not Sorry

• Ours

• I Know Places

• You’re on Your Kid

• Castles Crumbling

• The Last Great American Dynasty

• The 1

• Hoax

So yeah the superlative for the best Downworlder has to go to the delightfully and wonderfully written…

Magnus Bane <3

(Art credit: kasirose)

So yeah! I hope the answer makes up for the wait @imabitchforjemcarstairs ILY! And thank you so much for the lovely ask!

P.s. if any artist doesnt want to be affiliated, kindly DM me and I’ll remove your lovely art and mention from the post :))

[ardenrabbit]

Do you have any tips on how to be more confident in what you write? I feel like no matter what or how I write, it could always be better, and I fall into the trap of comparing my writing to others.

I also feel like my lack of confidence is very apparent and worry that it annoys others or makes for a self fulfilling prophecy.

Ahh pls always take my writing advice with a block of salt! 😅 I'm by no means the most well-equipped writer out there, but I'm happy to share what I've learned.

I truly understand this feeling. It fluctuates for me, like, some days I feel like I'm a writing god, and then some days I feel like everything I touch turns to incomprehensible, structureless, stale, and poorly researched gibberish. Unfortunately, my confidence is largely at the mercy of a personality disorder. 😅 BUT! There are some habits and rules that I've set for myself that make it easier!

Your writing could always be better, and that's okay! You will frequently read back on something you wrote a year ago and wish you had written it differently. That's inevitable and normal. Most of the time, that's just a great indicator of progress that you've made in your writing skill. The important part to remember is that there is no perfect way to write, so cut yourself some slack and just write what you enjoy at the time. Yeah, endeavor to do your best and present a product that you're happy with, but don't ever expect it to be flawless. Embrace imperfection and keep going. It's the only way to practice and get better.

Everyone writes differently, and that's good too! It can be hard to see your own writing as good enough after you read the kind of content that makes you think, "That. That's how I want to write." There are works that have me screaming into my hands and wanting to hold myself to a higher standard, but I can't afford to let that paralyze me and keep me from writing to the best of my ability. The best I can do is take a deep breath, come to terms with the tragic fact that I will never have written Boomchick's No Water Is Enough, and take notes on what I liked about their writing and how I can learn from it. Don't do content that you admire the disservice of letting it make you feel bad about yourself. That's not why its author wrote it.

Do not show weakness. I definitely don't always follow my own advice here, but it's just like in art school: don't point out the flaws in your work to your audience, or it will be all they can see. Resist the urge to type out anything self-deprecating in the author's notes. If you start, hit that backspace key. You can trick yourself into thinking you were more confident when posting it, too.

If you feel like your writing doesn't come across as confident within the work itself—why? Are you pulling punches with narrative decisions to avoid confrontation? Are you leaning into patterns that you've already seen written because you're hesitant to branch out? Find out where and why you're doing it and rework it! Take risks! Ride the adrenaline! Be free!!

Periodically reread your own stuff and take note of what you like about it. Don't just nitpick at it; consciously and deliberately point out to yourself the things you think you did well. It doesn't have to be perfect or the best! Also take note of the things you had the most fun with. What lines of dialogue made you happy to write? What event made you happy to see executed? Example: I'm proud of how I handle characterizations and dialogue, and I have the most fun when there are big turns in events!

Along with that, pick a technical weakness you want to work on. Don't beat yourself up about not being the best in that area; instead, keep it in mind and put a little more effort into that when you write. Again, it's okay if it's not perfect. Don't agonize or let it get you stuck, but gently acknowledge that you want to get better at that specific thing. Shoring up your weak spots will make you feel more confident about the work as a whole, and it's reassuring to feel like you're strengthening your skills. Example: I feel like my weakness is scenery/environment, so I stop and try to add a little more detail about that in each scene that needs it (otherwise I will just breeze right over it and only write dialogue lol). It helps me feel like I'm taking control of my weak spots and improves the scene from the bottom up.

Above all, WRITE FOR YOURSELF. You won't make everyone else in the world happy, and you won't write anything you like if you don't write what you want to read. Be selfish when you write and just do what makes you happy! Dance like nobody's watching and all that.

I hope there was something helpful here for you! The best advice I can give is to be patient with yourself, keep practicing, and write what you're excited about. You've got this!! I believe in you!!

[mint-yooxgi]

wow...wow this chapter...

can we talk about the paintings? i wanna talk about the paintings. i love the exchange of emotional intimacy, with yunho sharing this part of himself, and mc letting herself open up to him in turn just ugh we love to see it. the art room itself just seems like such a magical place from the way you described it, and i’m weak af for artistic imagery so this was a joy to read. the moment with the radiant painting tho with the portrait of mc, where everything clicked and she was like “this is how you see me?” was just so beautiful. i love how it wasn’t just this one moment and then suddenly all the mc’s insecurities are fixed. no here was buildup to this, and the payoff was immaculate. it’s really nice bc i can picture this like romanticized image he painted, but it’s still true to the mc’s visage like it’s clearly her, just with the elevated romanticism of someone who’s in love with her and things she’s just that beautiful all the time. made me all warm and fuzzy inside. 

i really love how in the smut chapters, you have moments of emotional intimacy as a prelude to them being physically intimate. always love to see that. the pure comfort and trust that’s exchanged whenever the characters are intimate with each other is just delightful. also how did you manage to make bloodplay so romantic? like how did you do that? “paint me in you” AHH THAT LINE MADE MY HEART SOAR OMG. the whole scene was just so immaculately described like not only could i see what was happening, i could feel it, both physically and emotionally. and i say this all the time but the pacing was just perfect! it has the same immersive properties as your dream and fantasy sequences and is just such a joy to read and re-read to catch all the little intricacies. it took everything in me not to squeal at the sweet words they exchange like omg this is incredible.

and of course the reciprocity. i already knew you would emphasize the mutual feelings but wow this was great to see. seeing the mc take just much time and care for him as he did for her is always the best fucking thing to see. seeing her use the same soft touches and gentle words of praise just ugh yes douse him in affection he deserves it! the intimacy of having hem both intwined like this, painting each other with each other, is such a creative way to display their mutual love. 

i cannot lie tho i did scream out loud when he drew her blood and it didn’t hurt her, and he reminded her that he’d never hurt her even in this the SCREAM I SCROME. i just know my dog can’t stand me 😅 also the part that had me wanting to munch bricks, where he’s emphatically expressing his desire to please her, now that i have the full context i wanna munch cinderblocks

and the face sitting...oh wow the face sitting. had to read that in stages it was so fucking hot. first of all the fact that he’s so giving is already making me swoon, but then being so adamant on hearing the moans and reactions i live for shit like that. and then the feralness that seeps through the sweetness made things so intense and so fucking hot. i love he way you merge the two too, the carnal and the caring, and it manifests itself in these poetic professions of love and lust. wanting to get drunk on the sweet nectar of arousal, wanting to take in the whole experience, like yes! that’s the best kind of lover right there! and the fact that all that was done through their mind link, and with their minds caressing as well as their bodies? that was a super unique angle and made my heart fucking flutter. the bloom for me line had me down for the fucking count i had to pause right there like...wow just fucking wow! the ebbs and flows of eroticism in this were great to read to. you can really see the way the erotic energy peaks and valleys over time as they just enjoy each other which was excellent. you can see that same flow of energy through the riding part too which just made it so engaging to read.

damn i wrote a whole essay 😅. anyway long story short this was super fucking hot and super fucking romantic and i can’t wait for more! my mind has been completely blown

Ellie. Omg, Ellie, you’re literally going to make me cry, I appreciate this message so much and all of your observations omg 🥺

First of all, yes!!!! Thank you so much!! I really tried to emphasize the intimacy and importance of Yunho sharing his art with the OC, so I'm glad it came across well! It’s a big step for him and for the emotional vulnerability because as we all know, the last time he shared his art, it didn’t bode too well for him. I really wanted to capture that importance, and I'm so glad it came across! And yes!!! build up is so important, especially with the portrait of the OC, I really wanted to slowly lean into it, especially since it would reflect his nerves and the meaning of showing the art to the OC, so I’m so glad it was paced well!!

I’m also so glad the emotions came across well!! I always try to make sex a little more than just two people fucking each other in my stories, because to me, the deeper connections between them makes it all the more hotter. There’s so much more to emphasize I think when you have those emotional connections to play around with, because then everything just becomes that much more between two people. Perhaps that’s just me romanticizing love making, but I enjoy it, so I’m so happy others do as well! Don’t even get me started on the lines I had them reciting to each other omg, they were definitely some of my favourite, and long since overdue. I mentioned before how I've had this scene planned since the very beginning, and that also includes the lines they say to each other! I’m so happy you enjoyed the build up and the aspect of the blood play in the scene. I know I enjoyed writing it!

“If it’s not mutual, I don’t want it” is definitely something I live by, and is definitely reflected in the Oc considering their own thoughts on the matter lol, so I'm glad I can emphasize that!! Thank you so much!

Noooooo, not the cinderblocks!!!! Lmaooo, I'm so glad you enjoyed that part!! I very much enjoyed writing it. I really want to emphasize each of their desires in their words, and all of them are smooth mfs and the like, so I'm glad it’s all coming across and working out!

Oh yeah, I wrote that one line after he pulls the OC’s hand away and I had to cool off for a few minutes cause WOW, boy is feral in the best ways (at least, in my opinion lol), I enjoyed writing that scene wayyyy too much if you couldn’t tell, and I always wanted to incorporate his mental powers into his smut, and I'm so happy with how it turned out. Originally, I was going to have him project his vision - what he saw when looking up at her - into the OC’s mind while eating her out right before she came, and that would be the final push to send her over the edge, but I thought I'd save that for a later part. I’m really happy with how everything turned out, and I'm so glad you enjoyed it, too!!

And ehehehe I was wondering if you would comment on the ‘bloom for me’ line and I'm so glad you did!!! I contemplated not putting it in, honestly, but I had always thought about it since, you know, he calls the OC petal and everything. I’m so glad I did because it really pays off, imo!

Thank you so so so so so much for this long ask and all of your feedback, you honestly don’t know how happy it’s made me, and how much I appreciate it!!! I love getting to know what you think, and all the little details that you can pick up or that you enjoy from my writing. I appreciate it so much!! I really appreciate you. Thank you for reading, and I cannot wait for you to see what else I have planned!!

[zepskies]

I promised that we'd start ramping things up in Part 4, so here we go!! loll (Comments on your wonderful comments below the cut! 💖💖)

This is something I don't see enough of in the supe!reader side of things. Actually giving realistic consequences to certain powers is such a small but powerful detail. This and giving a certain level of autonomy to the reader/character really is an art and you do such a wonderful job of it.

Ahh thank you so much! One thing I think the Gen V spinoff did well was really highlight the downsides and potential adverse side effects of having superpowers, especially with the unreliability of Compound V. So I wanted to continue that trend here.

And as far as characterizing the reader, I basically come at writing reader insert characters like OCs, just without as much physical description. She's still her own character in most respects, and I try my best to make her and her actions feel "real" in order to make the story overall feel real and grounded. So thank you for shouting that out!! 💕

AHHHHHH!!!! Talk about *swoon*. Another one of my favorite tropes or scenes it's just *chefs kiss*. Plus with that suave, debonair aura around Ben he would be so insufferably smug about it too. I'm surprised there wasn't a comment along the lines of "I told you you'd fall for me" *insert wink*

Girl SAMEE. It may be cliché or whatever, but I love those swoony kinds of scenes too, no matter how badass the heroine might be. 😆 Ben really would lmfao. And that would've been a great line to add here! 😂

Going back to the idea of personalizing the reader/character. Making her/us nervous about performing is another example of well done integration of character humanization which I cannot praise enough of!

Ahh thank you! Again, trying to bring in those strengths and weaknesses to make the character feel real. For her in particular I played with ironies and contradictions -- she's confident in her powers, a master manipulator, good at putting on an act and hiding what she's really thinking, but she's still the "rookie," not used to being in the spotlight with stakes as big as they are in Payback. Ben is perceptive enough to pick up on that, at least.

A bit of warning for whats to come perhaps????

Oh yeah. loll When I was rewatching the clip from the movie on "You're the One That I Want," I noticed that "Danger Ahead" painted on the wall in one of the shots and thought it was perfect. 😏

Also, hot damn was that mini makeout session hot! Plus the catfight with Countess, Sirena slinking off with the help of Black Noir and that emotional ending. So many good scenes without making everything seem crowded or unnecessarily packed with information or the like. I can't wait to read the next part!

It all had to happen eventually, right? 😂❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 I'm glad you liked the little twist of Noir helping her too. One thing I also try to do is pace things out without it being too much, so thank you for commenting on that as well!! As always, your lovely review has totally made my day and put a huge smile on my face. 💕💕

Lost on You - Part 4

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x F. Supe!Reader

Summary: 1983 is a big year for you. You’re finally chosen to join the ranks of Payback, led by the most (in)famous supe in the world: Soldier Boy. He’ll never admit that he’s trying his damndest to figure you out. You’ll never admit that he’s actually growing on you. But the problem with this game is deciding who’s the predator, and who is prey.

AN: Ben claims his prize…

Word Count: 5.4K

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only for suggestiveness. Cheating (technically), more cat and mouse seduction, cracks in the masks, and a cat fight.

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Part 4: Better Shape Up

Who knew this man could be such a damn tease. You wouldn’t have thought him capable, for someone who wasn’t used to waiting for anything he wanted.

He demonstrated his resolve on a morning where you thought it safe to venture down to the gym. The others typically didn’t surface until around noon at least, so the morning was your time to work out and train in peace.

Today, Ben was already here. He was dressed down in a loose gray shirt and a pair of sweatpants and combat boots. He had already worked up a sweat and was now doing some impressive leg curls.

You tried not to linger your gaze on the exposed muscles of his arms and the outline of his broad back, but you slipped by him to claim a treadmill after offering him a polite good morning.

“It’s the first time I’ve seen you in here,” he remarked.

You shot him a glance. “I like the quiet in the morning.”

“Matter of fact, you don’t go out of your way to hang out with anyone else on the team,” he said, as if you hadn’t answered.

He was right, but the fact that he’d noticed that about you was interesting. It proved he had his eyes on you, in more ways than one.

“Smart,” he added. “The others are dipshits.”

You smiled in amusement. You were inclined to agree.

Well, most of them, anyway. Crimson Countess was smarter than he gave her credit for, and you were sure Mindstorm was as well, even if he was a hermit.

Once you finished your cardio, you caught your breath with a few sips from the water fountain and found a small towel to wipe at your face and arms. Afterwards, you moved to the mats to stretch out. Yoga was one of the exercises that not only cooled you down and kept you limber after a workout, but it also helped you focus your internal world.

Sometimes it wasn’t easy being able to sense so many male presences around you, along with their baser emotions. It had taken several years of honing your mind and your powers to be able to spread your awareness only when you wanted to. But some energies were just too difficult to ignore.

You raised your hands high above your head, then bent at the waist to lower them all the way to the ground. From there, you walked your hands out across the mat into a downward dog pose.

As you moved through your yoga routine, you could feel a hot stare on your ass. You almost smiled to yourself.

By now, your companion had shifted to a different machine, working on his arms. After a few minutes, you heard the heavy clink of metal on metal. You looked over and saw that he’d finished, dropping the truly massive dumbbells on either side of his legs. He sat at the machine for a moment, catching his breath. His skin was glistening with a fine layer of sweat.

He pointed over to a water bottle that lied on the floor, a few feet away.

“Mind grabbing that for me, sweetheart?” he asked.

That request was harmless enough. You went over and grabbed it for him, your warm hands brushing his on the tradeoff. You meant to turn and head for the showers, but your foot got caught on one of the dumbbells. You gasped and nearly went down when you tripped.

Ben stood and hooked an arm around your waist, pulling you into his solid form. You grabbed onto his arms on reflex. You felt sweat under your palms and between your fingers, smelled his musky, masculine scent. Your breasts were brushing his chest with every breath.

And all the while, he looked down at you like he was thinking about devouring you. You felt his desire.

Instead, he smiled and let you go.

“You okay?” he asked.

Your brain short-circuited for a minute.

“Um, y-yeah. Thanks,” you said. Your hands slipped away from his arms, and you slowly turned and walked away. You almost stopped at the showers like you intended, but at the last second, you thought better of it and kept going all the way back up to your room.

Ben watched you go with a smirk, admiring your ass in those yoga pants.

You knew your plan was working, even with all his antics. You could ultimately use his interest in you to your advantage: for your career.

The plan had started forming the second you met him in that breakroom, and was only reinforced by Countess's superiority and general bitchiness toward you...

But you also thought that man was affecting you far more than you’d like to admit.

So you tried your best to give yourself a break from him. You trained on your own, and only engaged in minor small talk with your fellow teammates whenever you crossed paths with them; even Black Noir, the only person you’d been able to share some genuine conversation with.

You’d sensed the friction between him and Ben, and as unfair and often cruel as you thought it was, you didn’t want to give the latter a reason to resent you. It would only muddle your plans. For that matter, you tried to stay out of Countess’s way as well.

Throughout it all, you began to realize that you were even more alone than you thought you would be in this Tower.

However, your excitement bubbled up again when Arthur called you up to his office. He seemed excited too, which already had you gripped with anticipation. You were hungry to prove yourself, and also to jump on a project. Any project that they might give you to advance your career and increase your exposure to the public.

“I happened to show Soldier Boy that clip you sent in with your audition. The video of your off-the-cuff duet with Whitney Houston at that live show? Now, it was a little fuzzy. Looked like it was filmed with a kid’s Kodak, but whatever. It was brilliant.”

You smiled genuinely. “Thank you.”

Arthur nodded. “Well, Soldier Boy agrees that you’re impressive. And he’s been chomping at the bit for something new. So, I talked to Madelyn and the rest of the team, and we think you two should do a duet together. A cover.”

You blinked a bit wider. “O-Oh, really? Of what?”

“You remember ‘You’re the One That I Want,’ by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John?”

“From Grease?” you asked with furrowed brows. That movie was like, five years old already. But you did see the previews for a new movie John and Olivia just did together, Two of a Kind. It was set to come out later this year.

“Exactly,” Arthur said, pointing at you. “It could be bigger than the movie!”

You doubted that, but it was still a great opportunity for you. Exactly the kind you’d been waiting for.

There was just one problem.

“And…what about Crimson Countess? You think she’ll be okay with this?” you asked. “She hasn’t exactly warmed up to me.”

Arthur sighed, but he waved a dismissive brow.

“Let us handle that part. At the end of the day, she understands this is all business here. No one’s gettin’ married.”

You laughed politely while hiding a sliver of unease. You agreed to the idea, but if Ben had a hand in this at all, you had a feeling you knew what he was up to.

You showed up early to the studio on a Tuesday morning. Ben, of course, was an hour late. You two had already pre-recorded your vocal parts separately, so today started the filming for your version of the music video.

You were already getting ruby red lipstick painted on your lips, when Ben stumbled into the hair and makeup trailer.

“Morning, sweetheart,” he rumbled in your direction.

“Good morning,” you replied cordially, though you watched him out of the corner of your eye.

He was nursing a tremendous hangover, by the looks of it. If it wouldn’t ruin your stylist’s concentration, you would shake your head in exasperation. Could he take nothing seriously?

Angela, his stylist, began by cleaning his face with an exfoliator wipe. She spread some primer on first before she went for the foundation. He stopped her with a raise of his hand and a halting sound in his throat.

“Make me a little more tan today, eh, doll face. You washed me out last time,” he said, slapping her on the ass. Angela jolted, but she gave him a practiced smile.

“No problem, Soldier Boy.” She swapped the foundation in her hand for a warmer shade. 

You barely managed to stop yourself from frowning. Asshole.

Another half hour later, you were ushered out of the makeup trailer and into the dressing room. By the time you stepped out, you were transformed fully into Sandy Olsson, Olivia Newton-John’s character in Grease, complete with the skin-tight black jumpsuit.

You were reenacting one of the final songs of the movie—the moment where Sandy drops her prim and proper upbringing to show Danny that she could live in his “edgier” world, if he was willing to step up, or shape up, for her as a man.

Vought had the money to create a truly impressive set. You stepped out towards the stage and looked around at all the people, not to mention the expensive-looking equipment on this production. You had been on big stages before, but not as the leading lady. This was big, and you could admit, it was intimidating.

Ben soon joined you, looking very much the part with a real cigarette in hand as he blew out smoke. He was made to look like John Travolta’s character, of course. His brown hair was neatly coiffed and gelled back. He was wearing a tight black shirt tucked into a pair of black slacks, with five o’clock shadow dusting his cheeks. You were a little surprised he was agreeing to something like this…but you also had a hunch on what was motivating him.  

A grin soon spread across his face. You averted your eyes, surprising yourself by the way your face warmed. However briefly it was, he’d caught you checking him out.

He returned the favor. His gaze lingered on your every curve, and finally your face.

“Lookin’ good, baby doll,” he said mildly, but he leaned over to whisper in your ear. “I’m gonna be thinking about those red lips tonight.”

Your lips pursed as you watched him walk away with his usual smooth, arrogant stride. You refused to feel how hot your face was. Instead, you relaxed your shoulders and raised your chin before you stepped onto the stage with him.

The director came over to talk you both through the script and his vision for the music video, a scene by scene replica of the fairgrounds. (And he handed Ben an ashtray for his cigarette.)

The opening scene was already set up. The pack of actors playing Danny Zuko’s friends were hanging off to the side, while a handful of young women in 1950s style dresses hung out on the other side, waiting for you.

The director called to roll sound. A production assistant handed you a fake cigarette to hold between your fingers, just like the original movie scene. Other instructions were shouted out as you stared into the cameras blankly. Your body felt stiff, your mouth heavy.

You were nervous, no matter how much you didn’t want to acknowledge it.

“Hey,” came a deep voice in your ear.

You turned to Ben and tried to hide your anxiety. He smiled and once again leaned in close. You felt the warm pressure of his hand on your lower back.

“You’ve seen cameras before. Don’t even look at ‘em. They’re not there,” he said, encouraging you to use your imagination.

You took a subtle breath. “And the thirty-something crew of people?”

“They’re the audience,” he said. “This is just a stage, like the ones you’ve been on before. Even smaller.”

You nodded subtly and tried to calm the ball of nerves rising into your throat. You made your way over to your mark and got ready with a hand on your hip, and the prop cigarette poised in the other. Ben went to his mark, with the other Greasers.

Ben smirked at you. “Remember to sing pretty.”

You shot him a teasing smile back.

“Oh, don’t worry. When I sing, people listen.”

I got chills, they’re multiplying. And I’m losing control.

‘Cause the power you’re supplying…

It’s electrifying.

He might not have had Travolta’s range, but Ben was a decent singer himself. It was rich and baritone, occasionally with some edge. They’d lowered the song down a key for him, you noticed, but you didn’t mind.

It was all you could do to remember the choreography, all while feeling the push and pull of the music, the lyrics, and the man himself. He was also making some subtle changes to the character in his performance.

“I’m not dragging myself across the fucking ground after her like some love-sick pussy,” as he’d snapped at the director.

So he was applying a more suave approach to Danny’s role, trying to persuade you with a Cary Grant-like charm. Partnered with your sensuous persona, it gave the bouncy song some new depth.

You better shape up, ‘cause I need a man.

And my heart is set on you…

It took a few hours to get through the first scenes, and you found that you and Ben worked well together. But his attention on you was intense whenever he looked into your eyes. His every small touch ignited across your skin, eliciting tingles of electricity down your spine.

When you finally got to your first verse after the chorus, you were up on one of the carnival ride platforms. Painted on one of the walls was Danger Ahead.

If you’re filled with affection, you’re too shy to convey…

Per the choreography, Ben followed you up a short flight of stairs and cornered you against a wall. You pivoted on your heels and felt bold enough to improvise. You drew him in with a hand on his stubbled cheek, and you allowed your eyes to shine with a bit of your power, giving them a violet glow.

Meditate on my direction. Feel your way…

As you sang, his hands glided up the swell of your hips and gripped you tight at the waist. His gaze lowered to your lips. You could smell his musky cologne mixed with cigarette smoke as he began to lean in. Your mouth parted unconsciously.

“Cut!” the director shouted.

The music stopped and a sharp bell rang out. You paused, letting your hand fall away from Ben’s cheek. He reluctantly released you as well. You eased away from him with a smile.

“All right! That was great guys,” the director chimed in cheerfully after he came out from behind the network of cameras. “Tell you what, let’s break for lunch.”

You sensed the burning presence following you off the stage, just a few feet behind. It shadowed you all the way to your trailer.

The moment you opened the door and stepped inside, you weren’t all that surprised when Ben grabbed your hand and turned you around into his arms. You stifled a small gasp.

“What’re you doing?” you asked, despite knowing full fucking well.

He was no longer teasing as his eyes swept down to your cherry red lips.

“I’m claiming my prize,” he said, his voice sinful and deep.

He bent down to capture you in a demanding kiss. You breathed in, and allowed yourself to give into it. Your hands slid up his arms, then wound up into his hair. He devoured you deeper with each new glide of his lips against yours, his hold on your waist moving down your hips and gripping your ass.

He mostly carried you as he guided you back against the wall of the trailer. His hand slapped against it to brace your impact, making the wall tremble. You gasped into his mouth at the suddenness of it, and he took the opportunity to taste you deeper, slipping his tongue against yours. He relished every small sound you made, and every part of you he got his hands on.

Until he broke from you suddenly, allowing you to catch your breath. You couldn’t help but blink up at him in a bit of surprise while you recovered. His smile was smug looking down at you.

“That was more than a kiss,” you said. Thank God you sounded steadier than you felt.

Ben chuckled and leaned in closer again, this time letting his lips drift across your cheek, and down your neck.

“And I promise I’m good with my hands,” he said in your ear.

You fought not to shudder at the depths in his voice. Your internal alarm finally sounded, however, when one of his hands left your hip to slip along the inside of your thigh. He stroked a thumb between your legs, over the silky leather of your pants. Your core pulsed with anticipation, but this wasn’t part of the plan. Not yet.

You tensed up and grabbed his wrist.

“Ben,” you warned in a gasp, issuing a trill of power on reflex.

Stop.

The unspoken command laced through him. He paused with a tense look, but not just because of your powers. He saw the sliver of fear in your eyes. He frowned.

For your part, you honestly didn’t mean to compel him this time. Your eyes widened, your mouth pressed into a line.

Part of you was afraid, but not for the reasons he might’ve thought. It was a delicate game you were playing with this man. And like it or not, even though you had the power to stop him if he tried to take it any farther, his influence still had power over your career.

“The fuck is your problem? You’re running hot and cold on me,” he snarked. But he relaxed, taking a step away from you. You released his wrist.

“I meant what I said,” you said. “Look, you’re helping me out a lot by doing this music video, and I appreciate that. More than you know.”

Your tone was gentle as you attempted to soothe his ego, but your words had the added benefit of being true.

“I’m still the new kid here,” you added. “Countess already thinks I’m trying to take her place.”

Which, at this point, you could admit that you were in a way. You had a feeling that she’d been using Ben the same way you were—to enhance her status and cement her position in Payback. 

He rolled his eyes. “She doesn’t have to know.”

You broke into a small smile, crossing your arms at him.

“Come on, Ben.”

His face became taciturn. You tried to gouge his reaction with your abilities, and you sensed his irritation underneath. He was likely trying to curb every inclination he had to give a nasty retort and hold onto the charm, but he was also starting to lose patience.

“So what the fuck do you want from me?” he snapped.

You held your tongue for a moment. You knew that whatever you said, whatever you did next could either make or break your plans to be successful. Still, no matter how much you actually wanted to give in to the desire in his eyes, you didn’t just want to be the equivalent of his mistress, or one of his forgettable conquests. That would make sure you remained on the sidelines forever.

No. The only way this worked was if he broke up with Countess for real. 

You stepped in close to him again. With slow moments, you rested your hands on his chest and leaned up, as if to give him a sensuous kiss. You stop just shy of his lips. He grasped your hips on instinct.

“If you really want me, you can have me,” you purred. Though you pulled away when he bent down to kiss you. You lowered back down to your heels.

“Just me,” you said. “I like you, Ben, but if you really do love Crimson Countess and want to…work it out with her, I understand.”

You crossed your arms. His jaw ticked in annoyance.

“They’re gonna have to fix your face,” he remarked with a gesturing finger. “Looks like you sucked off Ronald McDonald.”

Your mouth fell open in shock. You turned to look at yourself in the large mirror on the far wall, and sure enough, your pretty red lipstick was smeared all around your mouth. When you turned back to find Ben’s more amused grin, you glared at him, feeling a hot blush coming on. Pink smudges stained his lips and chin as well.

“Yeah, well, you too, Casanova,” you say pointedly. “You look like a…a fucking clown!”

It was lame, you could admit.

He just laughed and strolled out of your trailer. You huffed and crossed your arms.

He was goddamn insufferable.

Challenges of sexual tension aside, the music video turned out to be a great success. It wasn’t a perfect frame by frame rendition of the movie, but you recreated many of the scenes at the carnival, especially the one at the end. Ben actually hit the High Striker bell so hard that it flew through the roof of the studio.

Maybe getting out some pent-up frustration there.

The video would later get splashed across MTV and all the Vought channels. It piggybacked on the publicity from your first couple of saves with Payback that finally made it to the news.

It all did wonders for your popularity, especially because the reviews on the video were mostly positive—not only for the production and the quality of the vocals, but also for the chemistry between “Soldier Boy and Sirena.”

It just had the predictable side effect of making Countess even bitchier toward you, if that were possible. To a point, you couldn’t fault her. You and Ben did have chemistry on-screen, and she was smart enough to guess at your chemistry off-screen as well. She probably already thought you two were fucking.

You knew the truth, but you also knew it was useless to try and change her mind—hers, and everyone else who gave you sidelong looks when they thought you didn’t notice. Maybe you should’ve just done it with him anyway, if people were going to think it was true no matter what you did.

The only one who congratulated you on your success with any sincerity was your brother.

“I’m proud of you, sis. You’re really doing great,” Chris said.

You shed a couple of tears on the phone with him before hastily changing the subject, asking about your nephew. He’d made a new friend at preschool.

“Aww. Lisa, huh?” you teased. “Is she gonna be his new little girlfriend?”

“Well, she shared her box of crayons and he gave her half of his oatmeal cream pie at lunch, so they’re off to a great start,” Chris joked. You were happy to hear it, and you promised to send him another gift signed by Soldier Boy soon.

After you hung up with your brother, the next call you made was to your dad. Except, you never even got the chance to mention the video.

“How’s Mom doing?” you asked.

“Well, I was actually going to call you,” your dad said. “She’s uh, she’s not doing well… It’s time, honey.”

Your breath stilled in your lungs. You almost didn’t hear his next words: that your mother had been transferred to hospice this morning. That she had a matter of days, and you should come home as soon as you could. You promised that you would.

And suddenly, you remembered every promise you’d given your parents over the past couple of months to go see them, have dinner with them. You remembered that you’d never made good on any of those promises.

Your ears were ringing after you hung up with him. You wiped your tears away.

In your dissociative state, you went to your desk and looked at your calendar to see what was next on the painstaking daily schedule you crafted for yourself. Instead of packing a bag or calling Arthur to try and negotiate some time off, you donned some activewear and went down to the breakroom.

You shoveled some oatmeal into your mouth that you didn’t even taste. Then you went to start your morning routine at the gym.

To your unpleasant surprise, Crimson Countess was there. She was running on the treadmill you usually took. You barely glanced her way as you passed by, aiming for an elliptical instead.

She smiled and tsked. “Oh, honey. That’s one rough looking hangover.”

You turned to her and tried to hide your annoyance. Your eyes were likely red rimmed from crying, not from a bender.

“You should drink more water,” she said, gesturing with a finger around her face. “Might help with the bags under your eyes.”

You sucked in your cheeks and pursed your lips. An irrational anger, dark and deep, roiled in your gut.

“Maybe you can give me the number of your surgeon too,” you shot back. “That’s how you got those plastic tits, right?”

Countess visibly paused, like she hadn’t expected you to hit back. You normally just took whatever snide remarks she made with a smile, as if it were a joke (or at worse, a look of nonchalance). Today was not that day.

She turned off her machine and slowed to a stop.

“No, but I do know someone who can suck the cellulite out of your ass,” she said snidely. She grabbed a water bottle up from the floor and took a sip. You hopped off your own machine and smacked the bottle out of her hand. It made water spill down the front of her red sports bra.

“Tell me, Donna. As the most senior female superhero in Payback, how does it feel to be every man’s guilty pleasure jerk off material?” you sniped.

That managed to strike a nerve. She sneered at you.

“That’s right, honey. Everyone in the world knows who I am,” she said with a haughty look. Her eyes were cold and cruel. “The only way someone’s gonna remember you is exactly how you got here. On your fucking knees.”

She shoved at your shoulders, pushing you back a couple of steps. Your temper finally snapped.

“Oh really? The only reason people know you is because you’re fucking the ‘boss,’” you said, air quotes included. Then you laughed. “The Sonny and Cher routine? Please. Soldier Boy doesn’t love you. He doesn’t even fucking respect you. And you let him walk all over you. Because it keeps you exactly where you want to be. On your knees, sucking off the oldest dick in the world.”

You could see how your words were cutting into her, making her seethe. Her hand came up swiftly with a slap across your face. She was strong. The force behind the hit made you stumble again, but this time, you weren’t holding back. You threw a punch that caught her on the side of her nose. (And for the record, that one actually was fake.)

It soon devolved into a petty, dirty, angry fight, complete with hair pulling, punching, and a kick to the stomach that sent Countess onto her back on the hardwood floor.

The gym doors opened to Ben and Gunpowder rushing in. They must’ve heard the commotion, because they were already on alert. Ben’s face was set with a frown while he watched you squared up on the mats. Your opponent was slowly getting to her feet, huffing and puffing with rage.

Your eyes widened when Countess raised her hands, and a red glow of energy materialized. She tossed a red hot fireball in your direction. You dove across the mat to avoid it, but it vaporized half the gym equipment on your side of the room. You twisted your ankle badly on the way down as well.

While Ben intervened and stopped Countess from hurling another fireball, Gunpowder went to you.

“You okay?” he asked. He reached out a hand to you, but stopped short, like he was afraid of your touch. You were dismayed, but you grimaced and tried to help yourself up. You’d fallen onto another exercise machine and one side of your ribs felt battered.

Meanwhile, Ben whirled Countess around by her arm and glared down at her.

“What the fuck is your problem?!” he raised his voice.

She was still livid as she tried to yank her arm out of his grasp. She pointed at you where you lied on the floor.

“Are you fucking her?!” she yelled.

He blinked in surprise, but he quickly recovered.

“What’s the matter with you? Of course not!” he bellowed. “Jesus fuck. Forget to take your damn crazy pills today?”

At that, she looked stricken. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she pinched the bridge of her nose.

“They’re not…I suffer from migraines,” she said.

“Yeah, well, do us all a favor and take a handful,” Ben groused. “Better yet, the whole goddamn bottle.”

You somehow managed to pull yourself to your feet. Gunpowder was useless, since he was wary of touching you. Really? Does he think I’m going to hijack his mind right here and now?

It hurt, but you hopped from machine to ruined machine in attempt to get out of the room. Ben started toward you. You held a hand up to stop him.

“I’m okay,” you said shakily. “I don’t need help.”

At this point, you were done being reckless. You didn’t want to give Countess any more ammunition against you. 

You managed to limp your way out of the gym and down the hall to the sound of Ben’s shouting, versus Countess’s enraged crying.

“I know you’re fucking her. You want to know why? Because you fuck anything with a pulse!”

“Christ on a cross, I can’t talk to a hysterical woman.”

You shook your head, despite the tears burning in your eyes. You felt your way down the wall like a one-legged crab.

Until a strong pair of arms scooped you up under your legs and around your back. 

You gasped and met a masked Black Noir.

Without a word, he carried you up to your room. There he set you on your feet, in front of your door. You braced yourself with a hand on the doorknob, but you carefully twisted around to look back at him.

“Thank you,” you said with a sniff.

He paused. You sensed his uncertainty.

“Feel better,” he said.

Then he left you alone in the hall.

You took the longest hot bath of your life, dumping in half a bottle of lavender bath soaks. It helped your aches and pains, but it still didn’t manage to wash the day away.

I need to go home, you were reminded. You needed to see your mom, before…

You covered your face with your hands, and you finally allowed yourself to cry.

Back in the gym, Ben cut off Donna's enraged rant with a sharp grip on her arm. He shook her once, hard enough to make her teeth click. It startled a gasp out of her.

She looked up at him and couldn’t entirely hide her fear.

“Get a goddamn grip,” he growled. “Never fucking disrespect me like that again. And if you make another mess like this, so help me God, you’re gonna leave me no choice but to make you regret it. Do you understand me?”

It took her a moment, but after he tightened his grip on her arms, she winced and nodded contritely.

“Yes, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Ben,” she stammered. “It won’t happen again, I promise.”

He rolled his eyes, but he released her. “Good. Go clean yourself up. You’re a fucking mess.”

He left her in the gym where she stood, still holding herself.

Ben frowned when he didn’t find you in the hallway. At the pace you were going, you couldn’t have gotten that far, he reasoned. But he still didn’t find you, even when he traveled to the elevators and up to your apartment. He stopped in front of your door.

He raised his fist up, poised to knock, but his superior hearing perked up to a sound.

He realized he could hear you crying. The kind of muffled sobs where you were trying to hold yourself back, and were failing miserably.

Ben hesitated…but ultimately, he couldn’t handle two emotional women in one day.

He walked away from your door.

AN: *Sighs* Ben isn't shaping up, is he? Don't worry though. We've still got plenty of track left to go on this rollercoaster.

Next Time:

An album was playing on his record player. You recognized Sinatra’s smooth voice singing “My Way.”

“You want a drink?” Ben asked.

“Whiskey, neat,” you replied. He rose a brow, but he fulfilled your request. While he was busy, you grabbed his forgotten half a blunt from the ashtray on the coffee table, and you lit up. You didn’t often partake in drugs because you didn’t like being out of your lucid mind. You preferred being in control.

Today was different. You needed a distraction. Maybe that was why you were here to begin with.

Ko-Fi Me ☕

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[writing-good-vibes]

For this

"i hate the look that's on your face"

And also, is "you're the only place that feels like home" a Fall Out Boy reference or am I letting my one true weakness show

ahh hey !! 💗 thank you for sending an ask !! admittedly, i kind of love both of these fics !! not gonna lie, i re-read my own fics quite a lot, but i still think it's funny looking back on them and then seeing my more recent stuff. a lot of fluctuation. to me i think my work started off pretty grounded, then got very soft, and i've been trying to edge back towards that grounded tone lately. but i never know what works best, i just through things out into the world. i'm glad you enjoy my work though, i cannot tell you how much it means to hear nice things 😊📚✨

now, onto the scenes !!

the scene that birthed "i hate the look thats on your face" was definitely the image of vincent pummelling bo, while bo just tries to protect his face over anything else. also the exchange of "i hate your face" "folks hate what they can't have" was maybe the first thing i wrote for this one. just the bitterness and resentment between them that vincent they know is misplaced. it isn't either of their faults. it wasn't anyone's fault. it happened by chance. but that probably doesn't make it any easier, does it? knowing you were a fluke of nature. and for the record, this title comes from the frank iero song, joyriding. pretty much all of my fic titles are song lyrics.

no you're right, "you're the only place that feels like home" is 100% a fall out boy reference 😂 !! from under the cork tree is my favourite fob album (actually the only one i listen to all the way through). that line hits so fucking hard. the moment/scene that birthed this fic was definitely just the idea of vince and bo holding each other as a form of comfort and soothing when one of them (usually bo because he is my poor little meow meow) is feeling particularly bad. i've mentioned before that i think they suck at self-soothing because they never needed to, and apparently formerly-conjoined twins often sleep better when together. anyway, the image of vincent pressing his face to bo's head and that being what genuinely grounds them got to me. had to write the fic. and then sol drew this truly gorgeous art of it, which i look at every single day and which is more than i could have ever hoped for !! 💗

[send me one of my fics and i'll tell you the scene that birthed it !!]

[aenaxes]

Hey! I was wondering if you could write Crosshair going to the reader for random cuddles no matter where they are, late at night or out on the beach with the batch. BTW, I love the way you write and it never fails to get me inspired to draw our favorite clone boys. Good luck with Uni!

warnings: none

w/c: 1.6k

a/n: ahh tysm for this request! i got a little carried away lol but it's just because i had a lot of fun writing it! :-) hope this helps stoke the artistic imagination! (and thankfully uni is out for the summer so i have more time for our favorite clone boys)

It’s one of the better known facts that Crosshair doesn’t like to be touched, even if warranted, even if he’s asked. There are too many variables in another’s hands: accidents happen, sabotage is never unlikely, and sometimes youthful fear rears its cruel head, and he is flooded with the knee-jerk reflex of memories in the alabaster halls of Tipoca.

So the first time you cuddle with Crosshair, it’s just as much of a disaster as you expect it to be.

Crosshair lies like a corpse over the centre of your bunk, back rigid and ramrod straight, his deathly look complete with the ridiculous bandage criss-crossed over his hairline (courtesy of the simple joys of a ten metre human javelin toss and Wrecker’s miscalculated aim).

Where painkillers weren’t quite enough to keep the concussion headaches at bay, he’d somehow come to the conclusion that you would be. And who were you to turn down a sullen Crosshair mumbling awkwardly for cuddles at your door?

With careful hands and just enough of a firm touch to coax him onto his side without spooking him out of his moping, you maneuver him with his back towards the wall and gently push him further in before you climb onto the space beside him. He flashes you an uncertain look, and you offer him a wry smile in return.

“Relax a little,” you say, lifting his limp arm and slotting yourself against his side until your chests are flush. It’s less cuddling than it is you trying to mold yourself around the hard, firm lines of the tension etched into Crosshair’s muscle and poise. But if he was willing to put aside his standoffish pride to ask you for cuddles, you won’t deny him. Finally content with your arrangement, you lift your chin and fix him with a wry smile. “I can’t spoon a board.”

“Was that an insult?” he offers, a weak attempt at his usual wit that comes out as more of a whimper than bite. But to his credit, he’s listening to you, and you feel him shifting slightly in an attempt to make himself comfortable despite his somewhat unsettled expression.

“Maybe,” you counter. “Loosen your shoulders. Stop tensing. Cuddle, Crosshair.”

“I’m trying,” he mutters, and when you close your eyes to laugh, you barely miss the small upward turn of his lips.

When you wake up the next morning, you feel reborn, all loose-limbed, sated joy as you stretch your arms to your side, expecting Crosshair’s lean form curled close. Instead, you find yourself alone in your bunk, your covers pulled neatly up to your chin with no sign of your surly sniper in sight. You pull yourself together, albeit with a frown, throwing on a fresh set of clothes and readying yourself for a day of snarking (a bit spitefully) at Crosshair for leaving without so much as a thank you.

But then you see it. A small mug sitting on your desk: caf.

As you peer over the rim, you’re hard-pressed to mistake it as anything other than your preference made to perfection, and judging by the steam curling fragrant and wispy over its surface, it’s fresh.

Crosshair says nothing when you pass him in the helm, but when you flash him a grin, he huffs and offers you a lopsided smile back.

It takes the lesser part of one week for the headaches to abate. In between then and Crosshair’s begrudgingly clean bill of health, he comes knocking at your door four more times, each time gently loosening the deep roots of tension coiled through his bones more and more.

“You’re getting better at this,” you murmur into his shoulder on the fourth night, your leg thrown over his hip and your arms tucked securely under his. His first night in your quarters had ended in little beyond simply lying shoulder-to-shoulder. The next two had been (failed) attempts to spoon the entirety of Crosshair’s lanky form. And the night penultimate had been a slightly more successful endeavor in throwing all experimental caution to the wind and waking up chest-to-chest in an oddly comfortable tangle of limbs.

That night worked, and so you do it again.

“I had a good teacher,” Crosshair snorts, and he wheezes, his arms curling snug around your middle, when you gently jab him in the side.

You mutter something into his shoulder, but your own words do not reach your ears when you feel his chin settle atop your head. He shifts carefully until he’s curled entirely around you, the anchor in a still sea, a promise that you, together in shared space and breath, simply are. It’s funny how these things work, you think, breathing shallow and slow as Crosshair brushes his nose over the crown of your head and stays.

And then the concussion heals, and he’s gone.

It’s a bit startling how quickly you had grown accustomed to Crosshair’s presence in your bunk within the brief span of a week. You don’t expect to miss it, the easy nighttime habit as Crosshair quietly slinks to your room: a well-rehearsed ritual of playful snark before the gentler art of accommodation, pushing and pulling in tandem to find the sweet stability of your cheek laid over Crosshair’s collar and his palm warm over the small of your back.

You don’t expect to miss it so much that you find yourself lying in bed well past lights out, simply bracing to sling meaningless jokes thrown in the helm the next morning about how Crosshair’s gone soft, little baby brother Crosshair, like the week prior meant little but a favor to a friend.

The telltale knock sets him apart; four rapid, light raps on the durasteel that you’ve come to know so well, and you’re hauling yourself out of bed and slapping the door lock open as fast as you can.

“Cuddles,” Crosshair says as soon as he catches sight of you in the doorway.

He should be fine; he is fine, if Tech is to be believed. So there’s no reason for him to be waking you and requesting entry. But he is here. You stuff down the dizzying stutter in your chest and meet the mirth in his eyes with the best frown you can manage.

For all the stubborn fronting and the cold refusal you could offer him, there’s something you cannot bring yourself to resent when Crosshair—sour, cynical Crosshair—lets the word “cuddle” find home, curled soft over his tongue (lets himself find home in you).

“Will you make me caf in the morning?”

“Depends on how well you cuddle,” he replies, his tone a deadly calm, only betrayed by the knowing gleam in his eye.

“Says the man who didn’t know how to cuddle a few days ago,” you shoot back.

“The apprentice outdoes the master,” Crosshair shakes his head with a wistful sigh, and you laugh, reaching forward to twine your fingers with his, letting him take his rightful place as the doors close behind you.

—

He comes back home.

Wrecker tells you to give him space, Echo shakes his head when you idle in front of his closed door, and even Omega offers you a sad, apologetic look when Crosshair makes the rare, silent appearance outside of his quarters, a spectre and his bacta patch haunting the ship’s hull before he disappears again.

You listen to them for a few days, but it chews at you from inside—the gnawing thought that Crosshair had been alone for so long, that he’s still alone now. Even if his basest instinct had always been to withdraw and cope in isolation, you can’t stand the idea of leaving him by himself any longer. So when the others have long since fallen asleep, you creep to Crosshair’s room and knock four times in rapid succession.

Like you had expected, he’s awake. But when he opens the door, he keeps his unfocused eyes cast aside.

“Cuddles,” you whisper, testing, hopeful, and you open your arms to him as you stand on the threshold. “Just like we used to?”

Only then does Crosshair flick his weary eyes up, rimmed red with exhaustion, grief overdue. And after four long days, he finally meets your gaze.

You watch as his eyes linger under furrowed brows, peering at you as if he isn’t entirely sure if you’re real, if you’re really there. Watching him waver between your face and your open palms and back again, you imagine Crosshair thinking that it’s always been the other way around: him seeking you out at odd hours to wrap his lean arms around your shoulders, breathe deep, and simply bask in how close you were to his beating heart.

And now it’s you.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, stepping forward between your outstretched arms to gingerly place his chin over your shoulder and settle his lean arms at your waist.

All those times you spent curled, molded around him in the quiet darkness of your bunk—it’s honed you to know him like you know yourself, committing to indelible memory the way he breathes, shifts, fits with you.

And he’s different. A year’s worth of separation would do that, change. But where you feel some new muscle and sinew against your skin, there is undeniable familiarity in how he seeks you out despite the tremble in his hands and unsteadiness of his breath.

There is familiarity in finding home.

You reach up, looping your arms around his neck. And when you pull snug, you feel him squeeze your waist in return, holding tight and holding close.

“Just like we used to.”

[xx-vergil-xx]

hello hello hello hi ‘nother hounds enjoyer here. saw an ask you responded to and mentioned wanting to be able to art. this is v much your choice but oh my god if you want to do art just fucken. put lines down on a page. even if u hate it. keep doing it. like. I (granted I’m not the pinnacle of art of course) feel shit about my stuff about as much as I like my work, even though im approaching 6yrs of doing it. nd I know many more experienced artists feel the same way. do it and channel the homosexual audacity 🙏 /lh

That being said I’m a weak bitch and I WILL be drawing shit based on the latest and possibly previous chapters, ur prose makes me feel Emotions and I gotta get em outttt boi. big love and motivation to u for writing the rest of it and onwards!!!!

hello!! thank you for the very inspiring words –– I have a super hard time like. getting away from being self-critical/perfectionist about things, ya know? sometimes the inner "it could be better why isn't it better do better" demon is a loud little bitch. but your words have very much helped silence that cringe little voice and maybe I'll sit down and do some doodling tn :) there's a ch 32 scene that is in my head like very specifically and I kinda wanna see if I can get it on paper! what the hey!

AHH PLS TAG IN ART IF/WHEN U ART I am so so honored that my words inspire the Art Urge!! ahh!! it is very very much a wonderful feeling that that gives me thank you for your very kind words <3 thank you thank you thank you thank you <3 all my love in return!! <3 <3 <3

[creepy-hornets]

This was sort of a practice thing, so its a little rushed in areas. More traditional art.

[arofili]

Would it be possible if you could do number 12 for Curufinrod?

12. Sneaking away to a hidden corner to share a secretive kiss.

~~~

There were times Finrod was convinced he didn’t care. Times where he was certain this was all manipulation, that Edrahil was right to be suspicious, that the whispered words of passion were calculated to make Finrod’s heart sing and meant nothing at all to the one who spoke them.

But other times, Finrod truly believed that was not the case.

Curufin pulled him aside, his palms hot and his grip firm. Finrod was no weakling: he could easily wrench himself from his cousin’s grip, should he wish to; but he did not. Sometimes Curufin was like this: rough, insistent, demanding. Other times he would play coy, go weeks without so much as looking Finrod’s way, taunt him when Finrod finally attempted to seduce him back to his bed.

He always went, though.

So Finrod let himself be dragged into a hidden corner of his grand dwelling, let himself be pushed up against the wall, let his lips be plundered and moaned into Curufin’s biting kiss. It was briefer than he expected—usually when Curufin got like this it would lead to one of them on their knees for the other, or covering up bruises on their necks—but after the first kiss Curufin made no further move. He simply...held Finrod.

Finrod liked to be held. He liked a lot of things from a lot of different néri. But Curufin was not the lover he went to when he wanted gentleness and love. He knew what Curufin wanted, and he would play his game, for a time. Even when they shared Finrod’s bed into the night, Curufin did not hold him close, though he did sometimes allow Finrod to curl up around him.

“I will talk to him,” Curufin muttered into Finrod’s shoulder.

“What?” Finrod said, baffled by everything about this situation. He forced himself to relax, to allow Curufin’s affection, but he did not understand. Was this a new tactic his cousin was trying, to catch him off guard? After the blunt cruelty of Celegorm in the meeting they had just left, it would be clever for the second brother to disorient him with unusual comfort.

Curufin pulled back, his eyes hard and angry. Finrod tensed, but Curufin shook his head, kissing him again, soft as he had never been before, not since Valinor when he was shyly exploring with the one cousin he was certain would not judge him. (Finrod had been honored, then. But Curvo had changed greatly since his youth. When he came to Finrod the next time, in Nargothrond, he knew better than to think it out of trust or admiration.)

“Tyelko,” Curufin explained. “What he said was—out of line. You deserve better treatment from your guests.”

Finrod stared at him. Curufin didn’t meet his eyes, instead leaning to press his lips to Finrod’s neck, not in a possessive act of marking him, but simply...a reassurance. Or it would be, from any other lover.

“You are not—” He frowned. “This is unlike you, Curvo.”

Curufin’s teeth nipped at his skin, and Finrod shivered. “Is that more like the snake you expect?” he asked softly.

“Ahh, mm,” Finrod sighed. He did like his neck to be played with. “Yes...though I hope you are not so poisonous as some of my counselors believe.”

“I am not here to usurp thee, Ingoldo,” Curufin growled, and the shift to intimate language made in that rich, dark tone made Finrod weak at the knees. “We want power and influence, yes, but Tyelko forgets who thou art.”

“Thy King?” Finrod challenged, tossing his waves of golden hair.

“Our cousin.” Curufin kissed his lips once more, deadly soft. “Our host.” He sank to his knees, gripping Finrod’s hips, his eyes glittering. “And I do not forget, Ingo, that it is thy house who took the serpent as its symbol.”

“Thou hast seen through my veil of innocence,” Finrod rumbled, grabbing a fistful of Curvo’s hair. “So, wilt thou serve thy King, fair vassal?”

“I know no King but my brother Nelyafinwë, who lets his own ‘fair vassal’ play at wearing the crown,” Curvo hissed, his breath hot and maddening at Finrod’s waist. “Nay, dear Ingo—my cousin thou art, and my host also, but to Curufinwë Curufinwion thou shalt always be mine equal.”

[hartofhearts]

It’s not a coincidence, they’re definitely from the same pair

(the Crescent Moon Charm earrings, that is)

It’s not new to #clotination that the Crescent Moon Charm from FFVIIR is the same as the earring from Tifa’s mature dress and her OG dress, and they’re likely from the same pair because it’s just too perfect to be a coincidence. See: this Tweet, this recent, highly-recommended Tumblr post by @skystarsflowers , and this shameless self-promotion reblog from last year with the OG concept art.

I’ve seen some naysayers try to wave it away by saying that because there are three Crescent Moon Charms in the game (Marle’s gift, Tifa’s outfit, and the Whack a Box prize), “it’s not like it’s meant to be an earring or something, it’s probably just a normal in-world item and it’s just a coincidence that Tifa decided to wear it as an earring.” Weak, I know.

However, the side by side comparison of the inventory image vs. Tifa’s earring helped me notice something: they are absolutely earrings and they absolutely make a perfect pair.

(Source: the aforementioned Tweet)

If a dangling earring has an intended “front/back” (side facing out vs. side facing the head) and an intended “left/right” (side pointing towards the back of the head vs. side pointing towards the face), then the two earrings in the pair are similar, but have a different “handedness.” To illustrate, think about human hands... left hands are similar to right hands, but because the thumbs always need to face inward and the palms always need to face down, human hands can’t be identical. A pair of hands are mirror images--similar and opposite. 

Now, here’s an example of some real-life crescent moon earrings with an obvious handedness--the ornamented front needs to face out when you’re wearing it, and the moon’s face needs to point in the same direction when worn in both ears, be it looking back at your hair or forward towards your face. These two earrings are also mirror images--similar with an opposite handedness.

Now let’s look at that Crescent Moon Charm comparison pic again. 

(Source: the same aforementioned Tweet)

The Crescent Moon Charm has a handedness, as it has an ornamented front--the embossed lines and raised bumps--and the moon itself needs to face backwards when worn. The “charm” that Cloud receives opens to the left, and the earring that Tifa wears opens to the right.... They are mirror images of each other--two similar but opposite earrings--so together they make up a single, complete pair.

But wait, there’s more!

First: Another user from Reddit pointed out how in the dropped Tifa chapter (here’s a great Ultimania translation and rundown by @silver-wield ​​), Marle was supposed to create Tifa’s dress. Is it really so much of a stretch to suggest that we would have seen Marle give Tifa the earring to complete her outfit in this chapter? Maybe even in a “parallel” scene that hints it’s the mate to Cloud’s and Marle is giving the relationship her approval?

Second: There are multiple earring accessories in FFVIIR--Earrings, Platinum Earrings, and Revival Earrings. The name makes it obvious that they come in a pair, and the design makes it obvious that they’re *earrings* because of the hook (the Revival Earrings’ hook is the most similar to the Crescent Moon Charm’s... so to all you doubters, the Charm is definitely designed to be an earring). 

The Crescent Moon Charm is special from these other earrings in that a ��Charm” is singular--this accessory comes as a lone item, really emphasizing that it’s not a pair of earrings like the others are. However, it’s especially significant that the devs chose to call this item a “Charm” and not an “Earring.” :

Yeah, this isn’t just a single earring that Marle gave Cloud and Tifa separately for the hell of it. This is a single earring which has become lucky and protective because Cloud has one and Tifa has the other, and these two halves of a single whole have “a fervent desire to be by [each other’s] side for eternity” which protects each other. 

Ahh these two melt my heart 💕

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

(If this feels familiar, it could be because this was based on a comment of mine from Reddit, where I’m pretty active but discreet about my rabid Tumblr/Cloti love haha. PS I see some of you in the #cloti tag are there too, I always throw you an upvote or a comment when I see you 💖)

[picnokinesis]

fic writer review

tagged by the wonderful @swinging-stars-from-satellites whoop!! Let’s go!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

Fourteen! It was thirteen until yesterday, which appealed to me a lot, but I decided that posting pirate!thoschei was worth changing that number hahaha

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

394,102

3. How many fandoms have you written for?

Technically five, because I’m not counting Avengers and MCU as two different fandoms hahaha. But they are: Doctor Who (2005), MCU, Stargate Universe, The Greatest Showman, and X-Men (comics) - the latter, though, wasn’t really for that fandom, because I was writing a TGS X-Men au hahaa

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

Liminality , with 195 kudos - I am not surprised about this one, since it’s probably the most ‘readable’ of my fics, being a oneshot, not shippy, and also not being stupidly long haha!

Renegades in the Ring , with 144 kudos - I didn’t realise how much kudos this one got? I guess it helped that the fandom was very active when I first posted this. Alas, if only I had finished this one...I have a lot of nostalgia for the idea, but I don’t think I’ll ever return to it, simply because it would take about as much effort as campervan au is taking me right now. 

i need a place to hide (before the storm begins) , with 125 kudos - which I am genuinely SO happy about because ahh! This is my big project and to know that 125 people said ‘yes this is good’ is just...really really nice?? Especially when it’s such a niche, specific au.

Tropospheric Disturbance , with 125 kudos - honestly, I’m surprised this one has as many kudos as it does, since I regularly forget I even wrote it hah! It’s a weird one, because it’s not actually in my usual writing style, but I am very proud of it!

and they did live by watchfires , with 109 kudos - and I’m really really happy to see this one here, because I think this is probably the favourite thing of my own that I’ve written. 

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

YES absolutely!! I love comments so much, and I really love to ramble about my stories because I almost always have a LOT of thoughts hahaha

6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I mean, it’s probably a toss up between i need a place to hide (because I ended it on that twist/cliffhanger), Retrograde (which is another cliffhanger ending, leaving all the characters in a REALLY BAD situation), or maybe the new problem kid, you’ll taste all the salt in my lungs, because, uh, it basically ends with the Doctor saying ‘the person I was before this moment is dead’ HAHAHA. But, to be honest, I don’t know if I would call any of those endings VERY angsty? They’re more like ‘AHHH WHAT HAPPENS NEXT’ endings rather than angst. I don’t tend to write angsty endings because I love angst but I always prefer to end it on a hopeful note...otherwise it feels very unsatisfying for me to write, personally. 

7. Do you write crossovers?

Technically? I mean, I see Renegades as an au more than a crossover, because it’s merely set in the same universe as the X-Men comics, and the only crossover element is Nathaniel Essex being in it...and I never even wrote those scenes hahaha

8. Ever received hate on a fic?

Nah, people are wonderful!

9. Do you write smut?

Since I’m sex-repulsed, this is a hard no HAHA

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know!

11. Ever had a fic translated?

I have not

12. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Me and @sunshinedaysforever have a collab-wip graveyard in our dms HAHA - but I am actually working on cowriting a fic with some other wonderful folks at the moment! I am. Supposed to have my part finished by the 6th. Hm. 

13. All time fav ship?

Right now, it’s thoschei/spydoc, but I wouldn’t necessarily say that’s my all time favourite, because my favourite changes a lot. I do have a HUGE amount of love for Clintasha and Rush/Young though! 

14. WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Hmmmmm, there’s a few. I mean, at the moment, I feel like The Grandfather Paradox will NEVER get finished, but I like to think that if I’m still into Doctor Who enough when I finally finish campervan, I might take a crack at it? Grandfather Paradox is more solid atm than some of my other wips...(see: deathless, disarmed). Oh, I know which one I almost certainly won’t finish - this one I came up with waaay back before In the Wind, which is set between O55 and Telsa, which is about telepathy and not listening to warnings from the past, amongst other things.

15. Writing strengths?

I’ve been informed that I’m really good at character voices, and I also think that I’m quite good at expanding characters we see very little of and fleshing them out a lot more. I’ve had to do that a lot for campervan and it’s been really good fun!

16. Writing weaknesses?

I think I can get kinda tangled in the emotional plot lines sometimes, and it makes everything get convoluted and messy and hard to follow? Also I’m not very good at...taking a good metaphor and expanding it? If that makes sense. I’m also actually kind of terrible at subtle, clever foreshadowing because half the time I don’t know what’s happening HAHAHAHAH but sometimes I do manage it!! I’m trying to do it in campervan at the moment. Also I. Can’t write short things HAHA. My characters always think and talk a LOT and sometimes that’s good, sometimes not so much

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I’m actually doing it currently in part 5 of campervan, since Gabriela and Jamila both speak portuguese (and I’m learning portuguese!)

18. First fandom you wrote for?

On ao3? Stargate Universe. On the internet? The Avengers. Ever? Uh. I honestly don’t know. I made up ocs based on two unicorns in the aftercredits sequence of a My Little Pony VHS tape, does that count?

19. What’s your fav fic you’ve written so far?

I mentioned it earlier, but I’m extremely proud of and emotionally attached to and they did live by watchfires

If anyone wants my ao3, it’s right over here!

And oh, who to tag!! No pressure, of course, but: @sunshinedaysforever @theplatinthehat @taardisblue @hetzi-art @krebkrebkreb @echo84 @theoreticalabsurdity @1-of-those-things @walker-lister @timelostdoctor and anyone else who wants to!

[closedafterdark]

THANKYOU!! for writing the hyunjin scenario it was amazing!! Your writing is really good. If it okay can you write about kimlip? Where she tries to prove that she's a better fuck than heejin? Thankyou again!!!

Thanks to @nsfwtwicecatcher for helping me with this.

“Ahh, it feels so good to be home.”

Jeon Heejin kicks off her shoes and runs inside the apartment, not bothering to unpack anything from your week-long vacation. You watch her cutely jump onto your bed, landing on her tummy and sprawling her entire body. Heejin was still a kid at heart, just one of the many things you loved about her.

“Babe, we have to do laundry and clean the house. We haven’t been home in awhile.” you said, sitting down next to her.

“Oppa, you’re no fun!” she pouted, puffing her cheeks at you.

“Come on, my little bunny. We’ll feel so much better after doing these chores. We can even lounge around everywhere and order in.” you said, pinching her soft stretchy cheeks.

“Hmph.” she said, fixing your hair. “But we’re going to do more than just lounge tonight.”

“Was spending almost the entire vacation in bed not enough for you?” you asked.

“No! You forgot our bubble tea and on top of that, you fucked that bitch Hyunjin in the rental car.” Heejin replied.

You leaned forward and kissed her softly on the lips.

“I told you I was sorry, baby. Plus I’m pretty sure whatever anger you had, you used in the bedroom.”

Heejin smirked as she climbed on top of you, kissing you slowly and passionately as you two fell back onto the bed.

“Bunny loves when daddy compliments her.” she replied.

“You do? Well, daddy loves when his little bunny screams for him.” you said, kissing her harder.

Heejin laughed as she kissed you, holding onto your face.

“Why don’t I give daddy a preview of what’s to come tonight?” Heejin said, giving you a quick peck on the lips before slowly getting down on her knees on the side of the bed.

Heejin gave you the most seductive gaze as she unzipped your jeans and slipped them off you. Her hands were soft and warm, pulling your boxers down right after.

“Daddy’s already so hard for Heejin.” she said, smirking. She started slowly rubbing her face against your cock, you felt the edges of her nose and the softness of her lips press against you.

“Heejin…” you moaned as she slid her tongue from your balls all the way to the tip, covering you in saliva.

“Oh fuck…”

She teased your head, drawing circles around it with her tongue as she ran her puckered lips up and down your shaft. She made sure to draw out as much precum as she could. Doing her best to lick every surface possible, Heejin began leaving trails of saliva behind.

“Does daddy want Heejin’s mouth on his cock now?”

“P-Please.”

You instantly felt Heejin’s soft, wet lips wrap themselves around the tip of your cock.

“Ahh…” you moaned out as she sucked on your tip lightly and steadily.

Heejin tied her hair into a ponytail as she sucked your cock, knowing you were going to facefuck her. The moment she finished, you held onto it with one hand and her jaw with the other as you began thrusting your cock into her mouth, feeling it touch the back of her throat as her saliva slowly dripped down onto your balls. Unlike with Hyejoo or Yerim, Heejin has given you so many blowjobs that she no longer had a gag reflex.

You wanted to do the laundry and unpack your suitcases, but Heejin sucking your cock was well worth the wait.

You woke up the next morning alone. Still sore from Heejin’s insatiable libido, you groggily rubbed your eyes and checked your phone. How Heejin had the energy to get up and leave before you was something you will never understand.

“Hi, Baby! I’m still sore from how hard you fucked me. Anyways, I’m sorry we couldn’t spend the morning together. Had to pick up a shift at the restaurant since Jiwoo unnie called out. Hope you enjoy your day off! I love you.”

As you smiled rereading Heejin’s text, another one popped up on your screen.

“Hey, oppa! It’s been awhile. Hope you and Heejin are doing good! Anyways if you’re not too busy, do you think you can swing by my art studio? I wanted to show you some of the photos I’ve taken before anyone else sees. Call me back whenever you can!”

Letting her know you’d be able to make it, you do morning stretches and get out of bed.

Twenty minutes later, you were outside an intimate looking building sandwiched in between apartment complexes. It looked out of place: the shiny, modern buildings contrasted the antique, slightly worn down look of the studio. You stood outside, checking your watch every few seconds.

“Oppa!”

Turning around, you were met with a beautiful smile. Her milky skin and sharp features complemented her natural beauty. She instantly brought you in for a hug.

“Hi, Jungeun.”

“Let me show you around.” she said after leaving your embrace.

The walls were lined with photos that she took during her various travels. She was rarely around, having her in the country for a month was already considered a miracle. But she made sure to keep the group chat updated with photos and videos of her wherever she went.

“So, oppa.”

“Hmm?”

“Do you know why I called you here?”

“Wasn’t it to show me this art studio? Because it looks really nice.”

You scanned the photos, smiling at a photo of you and the rest of the group. One of the very first times you all got together, you missed moments like those since everyone seemed to be doing their own thing now. You observe the walls until your hand brushes against a white, logoless remote.

“Jungeun, what is this?” you asked, holding it in your hand to show her.

“Oppa, wai-” Her eyes widened as she suddenly jumped in surprise after you pressed a button.

“Jungeun, are you okay?”

“Y-Yes, oppaaa…” she managed to gasp out of her throat as she felt a sudden vibration flow through her body.

You look at her suddenly weak expression - beads of perspiration on her forehead begin to form as you realize what you are holding in your hand.

“Jungeun…”

“Shh, oppa. I wore it, just for you.” she said, placing a finger on your lips before smiling at you naughtily and biting her lower lip.

You pressed another button on the remote, watching her eyes slowly roll to the back of her head as her facial expression transitioned once more. She let out a moan, clenching her teeth before holding onto your arm for support. Pushing the button once more, Jungeun moaned loudly.

“Oppa, stop! Please… I’m still sensitive.” she cried.

“The girls told me how good in bed you are. I figured it would be my turn to show you I’m a better fuck than all of them. Especially that bratty girlfriend of yours Heejin.”

You raised an eyebrow, a bit surprised by Jungeun’s straightforwardness. Her seductive smile deepens as you slowly approach her, running your hand under her dress. Her thighs were smooth, creamy and began forming goosebumps once your cold hand inspected every inch of them.

“And what makes you think I would want to sleep with you, miss Jungeun?”

“Look at me, I’m hot. Although I admit, Yerim is much prettier than I am sometimes. Just sometimes. Plus, you need a woman to satisfy you. Not that child Jeon Heejin.”

“Jungeun, you’re only about a year older than her…”

“Oppa! It’s a year and 8 months, thank you very much!” She whined, pulling your body closer to hers. You pressed the button on the remote control again as your hand cupped between her thighs, unsurprised that she was not wearing any underwear. You felt the heat radiating from her, hearing Jungeun moan as the tingling sensation of the vibrator inside her pulsed on your hand. She was already so wet from less than a few minutes of you activating it.

“Such an elegant looking beauty being so naughty…” you said to her.

“Jungeun wants daddy to know she’s a bad girl…” she said, smiling as she began planting soft kisses on your lips.

“It’s a good thing daddy’s ready to go then…” you said, pressing the button once more causing Jungeun’s mouth to open as she moans.

Disconnecting your lips from each other, Jungeun presses her forehead against yours. Both of you struggle to catch your breaths before she takes your hand and leads you into a hidden room. Jungeun’s studio was spacious, a well-designed modern space that was filled with various photos and memories from her travels. The large windows provided plenty of natural lighting, but would also give anyone who viewed inside a good view of what was going on.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” Jungeun asked as she held her hand up and showed you her displays.

“It really is.” you said, although your attention was fully focused on Jungeun’s soft features being reflected on the window.

She smiled, slightly blushing as she knew you were talking about her.

The soft, pink cherry blossom designed dress hugged her body perfectly as she turned around. Jungeun’s face was one of the things you found most beautiful about her, almost akin to the various photos and artworks she has that decorate the walls.

Jungeun reverses backwards, still holding your hand until she feels her back softly hit the window. You bring your hand up and gently rub her cheeks, causing her to nuzzle her face against your palm. Both of you smiled as you inhaled the intoxicating aroma of her perfume.

She looks up at you and you become enamored by her hauntingly beautiful gaze. Leaning down, Jungeun raises her head until your noses touch, causing both of you to giggle. Lingering for a few seconds, you noticed her bright red lips, seeing her lick them in anticipation before you two begin kissing, your lips coming together as her straightforwardness and the sexual tension that quickly developed between you two is finally being released.

You feel her long, thin arms wrap themselves around your neck as you press your body forwards towards her. Wrapping your arms around her waist, you are happy to discover she is not wearing any form of upper undergarment when your hands roam her back. Her tongue forces its way into your mouth, causing you to be surprised slightly. Heejin and Sooyoung told you Jungeun had become more daring ever since her time overseas, but this was not what you were expecting.

As you continue to explore each other’s mouths, Jungeun’s fingers find their way to your belt, loosening them quickly.

“I bet you haven’t experienced something like this before, daddy.” she said, her eyes filled with lust once she breaks the kiss and looks at you.

Jungeun quickly lowers herself onto her knees, grabbing the belt loops of your slacks and dragging them down along with her. Tugging your pants that were on your ankles, she grabs them and tosses them into a random corner of the room.

“Jungeun, you’re not the first girl to give me a blowjob.” you said, slightly laughing.

You felt your boxers be removed seconds later, your cock fully exposed in front of her. She licks her lips, wetting them in preparation for her next act.

“While that’s true, I meant you haven’t experienced getting one when anyone passing by can see us.” she said.

Before you could reply, you let out a soft moan as she uses her soft, delicate fingers and wraps them around your almost fully erect cock. Her tongue gives you small, wet licks from the base of your shaft until your tip. She giggles when she feels you are truly hard for her. She pumps your shaft several times in a painfully slow manner. She gathers spit from deep inside her throat, releasing it onto the tip of your cock. Making sure you were fully lubricated, Jungeun takes you inside her mouth.

You looked down and admired the beautiful young woman on her knees with your cock inside her warm, wet mouth. She giggled as she sucked on your tip.

“Daddy likes when his little Jungeun sucks his cock, doesn’t he?”

“Yes, fuck…” you moaned as she strokes you while continuing to take your cock into her mouth.

While Jungeun bobs her head up and down, you do your best to look outside. Knowing you would cum right away if you continued to look down at her, you noticed that the outside street was relatively empty. You were thankful. Although it slightly turned you on knowing someone could see Jungeun giving you head, it was still relatively early in the morning. But here you were, getting a blowjob from one of the many beautiful women you know. You always admired her beauty and gave her small compliments here and there, but there was something equally alluring about Kim Jungeun being on her knees in front of you: her rich, chestnut hair bobbing up and down.

You ran your fingers through her beautiful, slightly damp hair.

“Good girl.” you encouraged her, causing her to smile at you with her eyes as she continued sucking your cock. Gently guiding her head into a comfortable rhythm, you watched the various cars pass by. There’s no way they weren’t aware of what was going on inside Jungeun’s studio.

“Baby, stop.” you said, slowly withdrawing Jungeun’s head from your cock. She releases you with a loud pop, her beautifully shiny eyes looking up at you as she gives you a cute pout that can be comparable to Heejin’s.

“Daddy wants to fuck you now.” you continued, as you lowered yourself onto the floor and joined her. She smiles at you sweetly before straddling your lap and sitting on your thighs. Holding onto her waist to steady her, you grab onto the ends of her dress and raise it upwards. Jungeun closes her eyes in satisfaction as she raises her long limbs and allows you to remove the confining piece of clothing from her beautiful body. She was petite like Heejin, but was top two in naked bodies - along with Yerim. You wouldn’t dare say that out loud, knowing Heejin would smile at you and put your cock in a chastity belt if she found out.

Kissing you once more, you feel every ounce of her desire and lust with each connection. You savor her sweet lips, her lipstick having the faintest taste of strawberries. She tears her lips away from yours, giving you quick pecks before creating a trail on your neck. Regretfully removing herself once more, she goes to your right ear, blowing hot air that sends shivers down your spine.

“I want daddy to fuck me.” she says in a sensual whisper.

Jungeun returns to planting soft kisses on your neck and jaw as you admire the beautiful woman on your lap in front of a large window in broad daylight. She was extremely wet, her pussy juices staining your thighs as you guided her while she rubbed her crotch up and down yours.

You bring your hands upwards as her small, perky breasts are in front of you. Heejin was slightly bigger, but Jungeun’s felt a lot softer. You cupped them both, your thumbs playing with her rapidly hardening nipples. A soft moan escaped her lips as you moved your head up and took her left nipple inside your mouth. Your tongue moved up and down rapidly as you savored her sensitive buds. Most of the women you’ve slept with had pink nipples, so it was refreshing to find out Jungeun’s were darker. While you continue sucking on her left breast, your hand does not leave her other one unattended as you take her right nipple into your fingertips. As you stimulate Jungeun, you feel her wet crotch and thighs continue to dampen yours as she grinds herself on your cock.

“Come ride daddy, Jungeun.” you said to her once you tear your mouth away from her chest. Her hair is now damp, her eyes filled with the look of a woman who needed to be satisfied. She reaches behind her and finds your cock, stroking it several times and applying her pussy juices as a lubricant. Once she ensured you were thoroughly covered, she squats her body slightly above yours. Taking your cock in between her gentle fingers, she lines up your crotches together. You feel only the head of your cock penetrating her tight walls, as she spreads her legs open and allows you inside. Soft sensations of pleasure can be felt before Jungeun suddenly lowers her hips and takes all of you inside her body.

You both moaned in satisfaction, the frivolous foreplay a good build up but could never compare to the feeling of the first penetration of a new partner. Jungeun was ridiculously tight, probably the tightest woman you’ve ever been inside. The muscles of her pussy squeezing your cock in a mix of pain and pleasure the moment you enter her.

“Oh fuck, daddy…” Jungeun moans out when you are fully inside her. You assume she is giving herself time to adjust to your size before she begins raising her hips and withdrawing your cock from her body until only your tip is left before slamming her body back downwards again.

There was nothing better than your cock being inside a woman’s pussy. Heejin was a fierce competitor when it came to being tight, hot and wet - but Jungeun was in a class all her own. Perhaps it was because you’ve never actually slept with her. It could also be because you only had Heejin on your mind constantly that her friends throwing themselves at you made them feel even better. Or, it could just be your inner desires to savor the feeling of being intimate with someone that wasn’t your own girlfriend. Whatever the case may be, Jungeun was tight, her pussy having a tight vice grip on your cock as it entered and exited her body. You believe she could very well be the tightest woman you’ve fucked so far.

“Fuck! Yes, daddy…” Jungeun cried as she bounced up and down your cock, grinding herself on you while circling her hips left to right simultaneously. “You feel so fucking big, daddy. Ahh!”

The wet sounds coming from your bodies being connected is something you will never get tired of. Jungeun bounces up and down your lap, her long thin limbs firmly pushing her weight onto your chest as she rides you. Heejin was a gym rat, always wanting to keep her body toned for herself, but equally for you. You noticed Jungeun was the same, usually eating vegetables or foods that conformed to her strict dietary regimen from the few interactions you had with her whenever she was in town. You admired her cute thighs as they slammed repeatedly against yours.

You were on your back against the window, unable to see if anyone was watching you fuck the beautiful woman who owned the art studio. Jungeun didn’t care about her surroundings, throwing her head back as you hear long drawn out moans become incoherent syllables as she surrenders herself to pleasure and her desires. Repeatedly fucking herself on your cock, you feel every muscle in her pussy tighten as it builds up pleasure between the two of you.

You never really imagined Kim Jungeun had this side of her - a woman who has a lot of respect for herself and would not be intimate unless she was sure about them. But here she was, happily bouncing up and down your cock as you gave her what she wanted.

“Daddy’s cock feels so good inside me… Do you like fucking my tight pussy?”

“Fuck yes, Jungeun…” you said, a tightness forming in your chest as her hands continue to be firmly planted.

You have never been with a woman whose pussy is this tight. It helps you discover a new craving, you want Jungeun to ride you until you cum inside her, holding onto her hips before slamming them down as you fill her. But you had to teach her a lesson. No one got away with badmouthing your girlfriend Jeon Heejin without a lust filled pounding.

“Jungeun, stop.” you said, causing her to instantly stop bouncing on your cock. As she catches her breath, you notice her flushed expression. Her body is now covered in sweat, her facial expression showing you she is slightly surprised at your request.

Jungeun whines as you slowly withdraw her body from your cock, wanting you to still be inside her. As you bring yourself upwards, you bring her along with you until you are both standing. As her chest heaves while she catches her breath, you turn her around until her body is pressed against the glass window. With your cock that is now coated in her juices, you enter her tight body once more.

“Fuck, daddy!” Jungeun shouted as you were in control while fucking her. You secretly hoped someone would pass by and watching you fuck your girlfriend’s friend. Not that either of you would stop if they did, the thought of being watched would turn you on even more than you already were.

“You’re so beautiful, Jungeun… and tight.” you said as you thrusted inside her pussy. You wanted to get revenge, show her that you wouldn’t be satisfied with her thinking she was better than your girlfriend.

Lustful sounds escape her lips as you continued pressing her body against the glass while roughly fucking her.

“Shut up daddy and fuck me!” she screamed.

You smacked her ass, hard. In this new position, Jungeun was even tighter than before. Her soft, small round ass reverberated against your torso as each thrust of your cock caused her to moan. You held onto her one of her hips while continuing to slap her ass.

“You don’t tell daddy what to do! Especially when you said not nice things about my girlfriend.”

Another loud slap can be heard as Jungeun cries from pleasure.

“Are you seriously getting wet from me slapping you? You’re behaving like such a slut right now!”

“I’m not a slut, daddy! I just want you to realize I’m tighter than that slut bunny Heejin!”

You slap her ass once more as you continued fucking Kim Jungeun. Throwing her head back once more, her drenched hair flies everywhere as you held her thin waist and pushed it back towards you. You wanted to be deeper inside her, make her feel all of you. Her wet body and natural aroma during sex turned you on even more. The friction between your bodies further accentuated the sinful act.

Jungeun’s tight pussy was making you dangerously close to your orgasm. While you continued fucking her, she tried unsuccessfully to try and grip onto something from the pleasure you were giving her.

“Jungeun, daddy’s about to cum. I can’-”

“I’m cumming too! Don’t you dare pull out, daddy.” she said, the soft stream of moans and tones of pleasure escaping her lust filled mouth. “Daddy… I’m cumming!”

Jungeun’s body shakes violently as the pleasure completely consumes her and she erupts in an orgasm. Her pussy contracted and pulses around your cock as you continued to thrust. The pain from how tight she is is beginning to be slightly unbearable, but you managed to fuck her through it as her pussy allows you to enter her even easier.

“Daddy’s close, Jungeun.”

“Cum inside me, daddy. Fill your naughty slut up.” she said, her voice gradually weakening in tone and volume.

You thrusted deeper and deeper inside her pussy, her body being pushed against the window. Your repeated thrusts inside Jungeun trigger another orgasm for her as yours finally arrives. Both of you enter a euphoric high as you climax at the same time.

Gripping onto Jungeun’s hips, you thrust inside her one last time as deep as you could. Hot, thick semen releases from your cock as it enters her pussy. You fuck her with several short, quick thrusts as you prolong the pleasure you two are currently feeling.

You unconsciously wanted to stay inside her for as long as you could. The two of you could not overcome natural biology however, as your energy is depleted and you guide her onto the cold wooden floor. You managed to be still inside her, perhaps her pussy refused to let you go. Whatever the case may be, you were thankful that your bodies didn’t disconnect.

Heavy breathing and your chest pressing against her sweaty back are all you can feel as you both slowly begin the recovery from the intense sexual activity that just occurred. Jungeun tilts her head slightly so that she is facing you, causing you to tuck the damp strands of hair clinging to her face behind her cute ears.

She gives you a fatigue filled giggle as you both smile at each other. You lean forward and give her a kiss. While not as passionate as when you began, it was filled with emotion. You gave Jungeun a kiss filled with love. Being the one to break the kiss, you opened your eyes and saw her smiling softly at you once more.

“Daddy… that was… so intense…” Jungeun breathed out.

You smiled, capturing her lips once more as you were finally able to withdraw your cock from her. Jungeun moans as she feels you exit her, a stream of liquid beginning to flow out of her flushed thighs and freshly fucked pussy. You stretched your right arm out so that she could be facing you, Jungeun instantly cuddling you. Your hands roamed her lower body, gently massaging her butt. There was nothing more beautiful than the afterglow of a woman after sex. Jungeun’s natural beauty felt almost angelic, the large window that provided plenty of natural lighting allowing you to see her positively radiating.

A satisfied breath escaped her lips, letting you know just how good you made her feel.

“Oppa, I haven’t been fucked like that in… Fuck, I don’t know how long. You were amazing.” Jungeun said. “No wonder Heejin wants to keep you all for herself.”

“You were pretty good yourself, Jungeun. I haven’t fucked a pussy that tight in so long.” you said, laughing.

“I’m yours whenever you want me.” she said, giving you a tender kiss on the lips.

“Whenever that slut Heejin’s pussy can’t satisfy you, call me.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” you said.

“I guess we should clean up, right? You came so much inside me.” she said, slowly struggling to stand up.

She extends her hand out, offering to help you up. As you pull her back towards you, she begins giggling as you shower her with kisses.

“Oppa, stop! We have to clean up.” she whines, laughing as she unsuccessfully tries to escape your hold.

“You’re going to let oppa leave right away?” you said, pretending to be hurt.

“No silly, I really did want to show you my artwork and the fun stuff I’ve been working on. But…” she said.

“Daddy’s getting hard again... and luckily my studio does have a shower and kitchen.” Jungeun continued, slowly stroking your cock to full erection.

“Why don’t we clean ourselves up in the shower and you make us something to eat?” she said, kissing you once more.

“Sounds like a plan.”

“And this time… you can fuck me in my ass. I’m sure Heejin’s never let you do that before.”

She continues having a firm grip on your cock before leading you into the studio’s bathroom.

[the-young-and-forgotten]

A Glimpse Through The Years ~ Third Year

| Masterlist |

September 1st 1993 - Third Year

Your father shook out his notebook as you pulled your suitcase down the staircase, struggling. “Daaaad” you complained “HELP. PLEASE.”  You head snapped towards him as he gasped, completely ignoring you. You drop the suitcase and walk towards him. “What could be more important than your daughter almost being crushed to death?” Your eyes fall on the front of the newspaper and your heart plummets. “Oh” 

There was a picture of Sirius Black, grinning evilly, baring his teeth. Underneath was a caption reading “BLACK STILL AT LARGE”. Your dad notices the look on your face and puts the newspaper face down, standing up to go help with your suitcase.  “Hogwarts will be well protected honey.” You roll your eyes “I know dad. I was shocked he could’ve gotten out of Azkaban.” 

You could tell your dad was desperate to get off the subject as he tried to make a joke about how heavy your suitcase was. You laugh falsely, indulging him. 

The drive to the station was quieter than it had ever been. Not that you minded much. It did give you time to think. How did Sirius Black break out? Why after 12 years did he pick now and What the hell does he want to do now that he’s out?  All of these questions captivated your thoughts for the entire journey. 

Your father beeped his horn to shake out of your thoughts “y/n, we’re here.” You lean over and give him a huge hug, promising him good grades and tons of Hogsmeade sweets. You collect your case from the trunk, running into Kings Cross Station. You wave to your dad for the last time running off to where the portal for Platform 9 & ¾ is located, a big grin on your face.

Another year at Hogwarts was starting. Sure, the school years so far have had its up and downs, but that's what you get for being in the same year as Harry Potter.  You grab a spare trolley and quickly throw your belongings onto it, running full speed at the pillar between platforms 9 and 10. 

You emerge onto platform 9 & ¾ a small smile gracing your face. You stand on your tiptoes, looking over the crowds of people and spotting Theo and Blaise talking with Draco. Your eyes light up as you push your trolley towards them.  Over the summer break, you had been consistently conversing via letter with Blaise and Theo, making the three of you pretty close friends. 

“Hey boys!” you say grinning. Theo gives you a hug as they both greet you. You look at Draco and smile sweetly at him “Hey Dray.” He blushes a little and moves to hug you as well. “Have you guys been doing okay?” Theo slung an arm around your shoulder “Yep! Mother was freaking out about big ol’ Black but I’m not fussed.” “I saw you with your mother Theo, you were scared shitless.” “Hush!” he said, placing a finger over your lips and glancing around. No one needs to know that!”  Blaise laughs as the two of you start walking away, taking long steps to keep up with you. “Sounds like something he’d do..” 

Draco runs to catch up, walking in silence beside you. Linking your arms through his, you shove Theo off, telling him to “Stop leeching off my trolley, I know what you’re doing Nott.”  You and Draco walk ahead of your trolley (Theo somehow ended up pushing it), the bickering coming from Theo and Blaise acting like background music. 

“What’s wrong Draco.” You say, breaking the silence between you two. He startled, blushing.  “Oh! Nothing Y/n, I was just..”  “Lost in your thoughts?”  “Exactly.” “...” “You know you can tell me anything right?”  “Yeah, I know.” 

You take a deep breath, ready to interrogate him further. But before you could get a word out, he straightened up suddenly, standing on tiptoes to look over the heads of the crowd. “Hey look! I can see Crabbe and Goyle! I gotta go! See ya!” He runs off with his trunk, quickly disappearing into the crowd.  Confused by his sudden disappearance you stand on tiptoes, searching for his friends as well. But you see nothing save a sea of new first years.  Frowning, you walk back and join in on Blaise and Theos squabble, walking onto the train. 

You fling open the door of your dorm, slumping down onto your bad, extremely tired. The train started to have malfunctions that turned out to be dementors that started feeding on your energy, making you weak with tiredness. Then, as per year, Dumbledore's speech had dragged on a little too long, making you almost fall asleep in your food. 

And now you were back in your dorm, dead tired. Eyes heavy and brain-fried, you drift off into a dreamless sleep. 

The first week back, as always, was a pain. Long lectures, mountains of books and homework and one too many headaches. Now, because of the escape of Sirius Black, the school was even more on edge. Students talked in low voices about the dementors, pointing out to the black, barely visible creatures standing at the edge of the borders to their friends. Gryffindors kept freaking out the First years, laughing as they jumped with fright. Teachers scolded students more harshly than before, glancing nervously at the dementors. Hogwarts had become cold, filled with fear. Cold but not boring. You ran down the hallway with Theo and Blaise running for the Divination classroom, drastically late. You burst through the trapdoor just as Professor Trelawney was explaining the significance of cups. Sneaking along the back of the room, the three of you slumped down at Dracos desk as he raised an eyebrow. “Long story” Theo said “Don’t bother asking,” Blaise added. “We exploded part of the potions cupboard.” you blurt out. Theo and Blaise sigh, giving you looks. You shrug at them as Draco holds in his laughter “How did you manage that?” “Theo doesn’t know how to use his damn wand” you glare at the boy in question, who turns red and shakes his finger at you. 

Professor Trelawnley suddenly approaches your table and picks up your cup, peering closely at it, her eyebrow rising. All conversation halts as you shift uncomfortably, wondering what she is seeing. “Ahh dear, you have a somewhat tragic future ahead of you.” She turns the cup and hums a little.  “In the close future you are going to lose someone close to you, this will warrant discourse in your life, but be careful of cutting them out completely because you never know what they decide.”  With that, she put down the cup and left your table bustling to the front of the room. You looked back at your friends disbelief and confusion written all over their faces. 

You jumped down from the divination classroom, the last one to exit. “What's next?” You ask Blaise as he pulls out the timetable “We all have DADA together… that should be interesting.” 

Draco pushes open the door of the classroom and you all file in. The desks were all pushed to the back of the room, leaving a big empty space with a sole cupboard in the middle of it as a scarred middle aged man leant against the side of it, reading a book. 

He looked up at the sound of the door closing and snapped shut his book “Ah, the last stragglers! Right, let's get down to business.” He gestured for the class to stand in front of him as he moved to the front of the cupboard. “I'm Professor Lupin and I will be your Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher for this year. We’ll be learning all about the creatures in the magical world and today we are learning about the boggart! Now, can anyone tell me what a boggart is?”

As the class was entertained by the explanation of boggarts, you felt someone poking your shoulder. You follow the hand to its face and glance at Theo who wordlessly gestures to Draco.

Draco had a blank look on his face and seemed to be shaking? You share a concerned look with Theo and go to ask Draco what's wrong before Lupin tells the class to line up in front of the cupboard, separating you from him. Oh well, you can just ask him later. 

You were halfway through the line watching as Ron defeated his fear. While everyone cheered for him, you watched from the corner of your eye as Draco walked up to the Professor and said something to him. Lupin nodded and Draco headed out of the room. You, Blaise and Theo all look at each other with concern before continuing on with the lesson. After watching Blaise beat the banshee and Theo defeat a severed head, it was finally your turn. 

You nervously step towards the cupboard and hold up your wand defensively, ready for what the boggart was going to create.  Slowly, a figure steps out. Quick as a flash, you point your wand at it, and scream “RIDDIKULUS!” at the top of your lungs before anyone could see what your worst fear was. The boggart starts spasming as Lupin steps in front of you, putting the boggart back into the cupboard.

He dismisses the class not before he scrutinises you for a second. You ignore this and run out of the class, barely having time to grab your bag in the hopes of finding Draco. 

You ran through the corridors, but he was nowhere in sight. 

One day, in DADA class, Snape took the lesson for Lupin. Your teachers mysterious illness was a monthly occurrence, something you were keen to know about.  You sat there pondering on it as Snape argued with the Gryffindors. What could be so serious that he had to stay off for at least a couple of days?  You snap back to reality at the mention of your books. You pull it out and puzzle over the chapter he had assigned you to read. Werewolves? You weren’t supposed to cover this yet…

You shrug and start to read through it, engrossed in the knowledge it was feeding you. The signs and facts of spotting a werewolf were vaguely familiar to you though you couldn’t think of why. You glanced up briefly seeing Snape gaze at the class with a smirk, who looked like he was plotting something.  Now that you thought about it, why did he pick this chapter? He knows they weren’t up to it, what could be his real intentions?  At that moment, Snape looks at you and you shift your gaze back to your book pretending to read even though you had already finished.

The lesson slowly crawls by and he finally dismisses you, everyone running for the door. You stepped over the threshold, still thinking about that chapter and how familiar it seemed. Your eyes widened as realisation struck you in the face and everything clicked.  No wonder it was so familiar to you. Professor Lupin… was a werewolf. 

Days later, the match arrived. Hufflepuff against Gryffindors. You hurried along the corridor, disastrously late for the game. You glance out the window, noticing the horrible weather ‘Ugh, glad I'm not on the quidditch team.’ you think, picking up the pace.

Your breath starts hitching, as your mind reels on the thought of the game. ‘All negative thoughts...’ you realise, eyes widening. ‘Oh no…’ you run to the window, grabbing onto the railing and gasping at the scene ahead of you. 

You shivered as you watched several dementors move towards the quidditch pitch, frozen in shock. You shake yourself to snap out of it, taking a few steps back. “I gotta warn someone…” you mumble, thoughts wild “I gotta- DUMBLEDORE!” You take off down the corridor, running as fast as you could to the quidditch field. 

You push through the teachers, tugging on Dumbledore’s sleeve. “De-dementors” You puff out, struggling to speak. He looks at you with a hard gaze before standing up and hurrying down to the court. You go to follow him, not knowing what else to do. 

You feel a hand tug on your sleeve and turn to see Hagrid pulling you back, shaking his head slightly. You sink down onto the bench beside him, trying to calm down from the adrenaline still coursing through your body. “Dumbledore’ll take care o’ it, don't you worry” You jump at his voice, but nod along what he said. “I know… I just don’t want anyone to get hurt.” He looks down at you, smiling broadly “Dumbledore let a student be hurt? I wouldn’t spare it a second thought” 

Several agonizing minutes go by before you hear any news. Without any insight as to what had happened, the school was sent back to the dorms. You could hear students all around you grumbling. 

Amidst the voices you heard your name being called. Shoving through the crowd was Theo and Blaise “Finally! We were looking for you everywhere! What happened? Do ya know what's going on?” Theo pressured you. 

“The dementors got into the school” you told them bluntly “probably lured in by the emotions coming from the stadium” They stare at you in shock, waiting for you to say you were joking. When none was forthcoming, they screamed “WHAT” together, busting the eardrums of everyone in a 20 meter radius. 

As you walked back, you filled them in on what had happened to you during the game, making them stiff with shock and hardly believing it. 

“So you saw a dementor up close?” Theo asked. You were back in the common room and playing a game of chess. You moved your pawn before nodding. He leant over the game and shocked you with his closeness “WHAT WAS IT LIKE?!” 

You push him away, glaring “It wasn’t fun at all Theo” He sits back sighing “I know, sorry” 

You stare off into space again before responding. “I looked out the window and felt like a shell. I couldn’t feel anything. Completely numb.” You curl in on yourself, replaying the scene in your head. You felt a hand place itself on your shoulder as a distinctive voice asked what was happening.

Looking up, you see Dracos concerned face. A smile stretches across your face at the sight of him. You hadn’t seen him in so long.  He notices you staring at him and gives you a weak grin. You shuffle over and pat the spot you just created. He shakes his head and remains standing. “Uhh actually I was hoping we could take a walk?”  You get up and follow him out of the common room, trying to ignore Blaise and Theo’s unsubtle sniggering. 

“Whats up, Dray?” you say as soon as you step out. “Just wanted to talk. We haven’t been hanging out much lately..” the two of you walk in silence for a bit before he mumbles something you barely catch.  You look at him curiously as his face becomes flustered under your gaze. He pretended to muss up his hair trying to hide his red face. “I missed you” he says, still mumbling “Like, a lot.”  You smile at him and link your arms through his “I’ve missed you terribly as well you know?” 

He trips over his shoelaces and laughs it off nervously eyes darting to you as you laugh with him. He clears his throat, and opens his mouth to say something. “Sorry I haven’t been around around lately-”  You clap a hand over his mouth to shush him. He looks at you in surprise, noting your determined stance. “I have no care for your reasons as to why you stopped hanging out with me. Just long as you keep our old promise okay?” Draco nods and you remove your hand from his mouth. 

He stares at you for a little too long for it to be accidental before turning away and jogging slightly ahead. You run after him, laughing as you catch up. 

He watches you laugh as the sunlight from the windows you were passing reflect on your face, making you look angelic. He smiles and blushes again and re-links your arms. He pulls you along and starts talking aimlessly with you about anything and everything, wasting away the hours. 

The next few weeks were perfect for you. It was nearly the end of this school year. 

Even though the idolized “golden trio” were being as obnoxious as ever, Draco had started hanging out with you as well which made you forget about their behaviour. 

The golden trio just kept getting more suspicious. From subtle glances and hushed whispers has your curiosity piqued. You could see it was affecting Draco too, but neither of you made a move on that. 

A few days go by and you watch as Professor Lupin leaves the school, his secret now out. You were sad to see him go as he had easily been the best teacher you could ask for. As you waved him off, you saw Draco smirk out of the corner of your eye and you frown wondering if he was somehow connected to all of this. Days go by and Dracos snobby side comes out momentarily, shouting about how glad he was that Lupin was gone.  You keep your distance, not wanting to be caught up in the strings of hate he was causing. 

Finally it was the last day, the Great Feast was just in a few hours. You race down the staircase, still disappointed from the last match. You knew it was likely Gryffindor would win, but maybe, just maybe, Slytherin could snag it this year, you were, after all, in the lead right now. 

But alas, that was not what fate had set out for you.  You and Draco watched in disgust as the Gryffinddors celebrated and the room was clad in red and gold. They mussed up Potter's hair and almost broke his glasses.  “Why are they winning again?” Draco asked “Because Potter fell off his broom and they all took pity” you snap back.  Blaise rolls his eyes at your petty disgust “Pretty sure its ‘cause they won the damn Quidditch Cup”  “Shut up Blaise” You and Draco chorus.

You sigh and pick some confetti off your plate, sitting down. “Well, I call it favouritism.” The Slytherins within earshot nod at your words, all silently cursing the Gryffindors. Minutes go by and you eat your food in silence before you speak up, glancing at Draco. “That petition is really starting to look tempting eh?”  “You sure are right Y/n”

Waking up the next morning to Pansy’s obnoxious laughter was a pain, you rolled off your bed and lumbered around, gathering the stuff you had prepared last night. You stumble down to the Great Hall where Theo, Blaise and Draco were waiting for you. They laughed at your tired state, teasing you all the way to the train.

You slept for most of the ride, catching snippets of conversations that didn’t interest you at all.

Hours later, you were woken up by Draco gently shaking you, holding out your bag for you to take, you smile at him and grab it, racing off the train.

One foot off the train and you feel a pair of cold stares coming from across the platform. Looking up, you stare directly into the eyes of Lucius Malfoy who looked at you with disgust. 

Rolling your eyes you turn to Draco, whose face had turned grave. “Well I guess this is goodbye Dray…” you say reluctantly “Yeah…”  The two of you stand there awkwardly for a bit before you drop your bags and throw your arms around him, drawing him in close. You feel his face turn red and you chuckle softly. “I’m gonna miss you” He was quiet for a moment before responding “Not as much as I will”  He lets go of you and keeps his face hidden as he walks off to his parents. 

You feel Blaise and Theo creep up behind you, staring at his retreating figure. “You reckon he’s gonna be okay?” Theo asked “Yep. The Draco I know is stronger than you can guess.” 

Blaise smiles at you and gives you a quick hug, signalling to his parents he was coming. “Well, I will take your word for it Y/n. You know him best” You hug him back before he runs off. 

Theo looks at you for a second before scooping you up into a bear hug, laughing “Write me?” he says, letting you go. “As if I won’t” You retort, winking.  He grins wildly, as he passes and salutes you. “Well i'm off! Take care Y/n!”  You salute back shouting after him “see ya, you big oaf!”

Theo’s laughter rings in your ears as you run towards the pillar, knowing that the muggle world is waiting for you, just beyond the wall.

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