#we're back on track!
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A new challenger approaches (slowly)
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#wen chao#jin zixuan#jiang cheng#lan wangji#tulu xuanwu#Wen Chao's turtlephobia starts now. I wonder if that's ever going to come back into play?#Slight re-ordering of events for the funny punchlines but we're close to getting back on track.#The mianmian stuff happening right after we also have a Torment Tortoise looking for blood makes this scene so chaotic.#A good kind of chaos as it is supposed to be overwhelming and anxiety inducing!#I have been sitting on the idea of the Beast being just a normal turtle with a knife for ages. Years in fact.#It's stupid as hell but that's sometimes what art is. Indulging the past you who would have loved to see the dumb thing be drawn.#Making it canon now that A-Qing's turtle (the one pd-Lan Sizhui found) is a descendant of this turtle.#Maybe she was so defensive because she has eggs she was watching over! How insensitive of these cultivators!#You can insert your own choice of boss music here - I did not grow up playing video games so I have nothing off the top of my head.#I am making a BOTW reference here so you could substitute one of those themes but I find them more melancholic than menacing.
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taehyung x on/black swan performances for @raplinenthusiasts [ cr: 0613data ]
#btsedit#btsgif#taehyungedit#dailybts#usersky#userpat#taehyunghobi#userines#heygingko#userdimple#usersevn#raplineuser#uservans#annietrack#rjshope#usermaggie#usermizuoka#taehyung#*mine#tw flashing#hi i know we're both on a break from here atm#but i needed something to commemorate him becoming an official bias wrecker#and what better way than through a comp of two of your fave title tracks#although this is lowkey for my other tae girlies too (ashley pat kayla & apryl i'm looking at you lol)#i hope you're doing well love#take care and this will be waiting for you when you come back <3
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thug beatdown round 2: electric boogaloo
(extras, cw flashing gif:)
alt:
the fit:
#tim drake#dc#sart#cw flashing#im grateful to the femme tim people for indulging me bc im back on my bullshit#long hair tim!!! LONG HAIR TIM!!!#if dick can have a long hair moment so can tim#further#as a canonical nightwing fan i think tim would at some point try to emulate that (also as a possible successor to the mantle)#(altho the nightwing!damian to batman!cass art i saw once also lives rent free in my mind)#AND if we track the progression of tim's hair from robin to red robin#this is the natural conclusion#in this essay i will—#aside but altho the only time i've seen jack drake drinking in the comics it was beer#we're gonna pretend he was fond of whiskey for the Aesthetic#also traditional upper class white man things#and tim drinks whiskey as a begrudging homage to the father he never really got to share drinks with beyond that one time he got magically#aged up#((i got a new dress and i thought tim would look nice in it))#god i can finally think about other things now
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#trump 2024#i'm not back yet#i just wanted to post this here#what a great night for the country though#love america#love this movement#love that we're finally getting back on track#stay awesome y'all#i'll see you back full time sometime next year
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Sketching
#me when idk what to draw: what if adam stabbed steve again#what if i drew my guys 3/4 facing left again#i love them#this brush hurts my hand though#gotta press too hard. gotta mess with it#looks nice though. probably entirely unnecessary and I'll go back to my beloved hard round#ol reliable#anyways back to sleep for me and then back to work#4 episodes through book 4#7 to go#and then thays a HUGE thing off my list#im just going ham on it#cause then i just have packages and episodes and commissions and patreons#all of which are like. episodes 90% and everything else fits clean in the 10%#this rn is like 50/40/10#very split between my things#and for my next comic im hoping for more like 70/30#sketches#ok bye my arms and hands hurt#just using posts recently to update where im at#I think we're on track to return oct 21 still#5 weeks ish#thats enough time for the book and 3 eps#can not wait to finally not have my attention split...#books take so much energy and time sobs
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Hi hello my computer exploded earlier this week so apologies for the cursed and late announcement post, but prepare yourselves! The first Saturday of a new month is tomorrow, which means it's time for another...
[VS] Art Party
July 6th, 2024 Captain's Cut, Stormbluff Isle Bloodtide Coast
Round 1 (EU): 9pm-12am CEST (3pm EDT) Round 2 (NA): 7pm-10pm EDT (1am CEST)
For those who aren’t familiar with art parties, they’re a concept carried over from Final Fantasy XIV - in-game get-togethers for artists/writers/creatives of all types to hang out, chat, and create together! Get your favorite character/look together, head to the location, find someone that catches your eye, and create! Afterwards, everyone posts their creations in a shared tag (ours is #VSArtParty) so others can see, interact, and share! Tl;dr: the ‘goal’ of an art party isn’t to be drawn, but to draw others, and share with the community!
Time and /squadjoin information is under the cut, but will also be posted again via reblogs as the squads go up on the day of the party!
Location Information:
It's another, proper beach episode! While I don't have the technical capacity at the moment to get a map screenshot of the location, it's essentially the southwest edge of Stormbluff Isle, the nearest waypoint being Stormbluff Waypoint! Here's a picture from the wiki of the entire island for reference:
Time & Squad Details:
As we always do, we’ll be having two parties - one on EU servers and one on NA ones - with an hour break in between. People tend to arrive early and/or jump between accounts as soon as the break comes up, so don’t be surprised to see tags and announcements going up ahead of schedule!
The first party will be on EU servers and begin at 9pm Central European Summer Time (aka 3pm Eastern Daylight Time or 5 hours before in-game reset). This time due to work conflicts I will NOT be the one starting the squad, but will instead be joining about an hour or so in! So, please welcome our first 'guest' [VS] tag, @vampiricsheep! Please /squadjoin or whisper Vegetarian Maneater for an invite in my absence, it'll treat you well and with my blessing. ♥
The second party will be on NA servers and begin at 7pm Eastern Daylight Time (aka 1am Central European Summer Time or an hour before in-game reset). I’ll be back to hosting this one and be on my main account, so to join either /squadjoin or whisper Kirslyn for an invite.
Closing Words
I said it at the top of the post but here I am saying it again - I am so sorry for the delay. The intention was to get this out on Mon/Tues at the latest due to me being busy with Dawntrail, but both my SSDs thought it was time to fry themselves and I've been scrambling to rebuild everything from scratch ever since. I've more or less got things back to a usable state now though, so I look forward to seeing everyone (and their shiny new anet-sanctioned beach outfits?) tomorrow! Thank you for always coming out to these and making them fun, they're one of the highlights of my time in game! ♥♥♥
#i thought only my C: drive had died but then when i replaced it i realized the D: one was dead too#so like i have my personal files safe because they were on external drives#but all my programs and games and stuff that were on the 2 internal drives are kaput :c#anyway sorry for the delay! but we're back on track now#gw2#guild wars 2#vsartparty#obnoxious tourist simulator#📢🎨
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PETE WENTZ SAID NEVER GIVE UP WITHOUT A FIGHT.
#‘title track’ showdown#sugar isn’t technically the title track but it’s the closest we got with these pre-hiatus fucking albums#they even kinda sound similar and i KNOW patrick did that on purpose#i’m SURE this parallel has already been done but it’s gotta be posted#i’m not even sorry#i love both these songs so much and this sentiment is so important to me#like best believe i’m not backing down without a fight in ANY SITUATION#EVER#fall out boy#fob#pete wentz#patrick stump#andy hurley#joe trohman#sugar we're goin down#save rock and roll#from under the cork tree
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reliving that xmen phase this time with my mom and i can confirm that everything, and i mean EVERYTHING could've been solved if erik and charles made out in 'first class'
#x men#marvel x men#x men first class#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#cherik#they jus need to kiss#ONCE#and boom we're back on track
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take me back (take me with you) | f. megumi x fem! reader | chapter 7: conversation
ao3 link for additional author’s notes | playlist | prev | next | m.list
chapter synopsis:
' “I can’t believe you’re leaving us for a boy," she goes, rolling her eyes. She doesn't even blink.
“I’m not.” You are. '
---
Megumi calls you back. You leave for Tokyo again, like a soul yearning for its body.
word count: ~6k; tws: none for now :)!!
19-6-2018
“So you’re really going to let go of them now?” your father asks.
“...yeah.”
“That’s good. I’ll miss that Itadori boy, though.”
You will, too.
In a way you suppose Megumi and Yuuji are very similar. They’d go well together, be good, fast friends and all that.
They’re both undoubtedly good people, no matter how they’ve beat people up before and how different their beliefs may be.
In Megumi’s case, everyone knew how good a person Tsumiki was, her younger brother included. Her kindness and virtue extended itself, inspiring other people around her. But Megumi was a good person, too— polite, patient (most of the time, unless it were Gojo— but who wouldn’t be annoyed by that man, right?), kind in his own way. He cared for you in all sorts of ways in the past, even then you could tell, gentle with animals and objects and your hand. Gentle in his own way. Giving you reminders despite the tiny calumniations sprinkled in (they barely do as much damage as comb bristles can), being sharp because he must have had to, kind because it was in his very nature. Easy on the eyes, tall, deep soothing voice— he ticked all the boxes for that, too. You bet that if things were different, and the two of you had stayed in touch with each other, you’d have fallen deeply in love with it by now. Yet that thought only makes you feel sour now that things hadn’t gone that way at all.
And Yuuji, too— there was no explanation needed for Yuuji. Even Megumi could tell he was a good person. And at some times he was almost like Tsumiki. You weren’t ever surprised that you’d caught feelings for him, because— who wouldn’t? He was always popular, even if he was ignorant of his own charm around others. But he wasn’t just a good guy with a ripped torso, he was honest, perceptive and smart in conversations. Smarter than he ever credited himself for. Smart in a way you could never be— people with cute faces, nice bodies and good social skills were in a league of their own, practically. You’d thought that for a long time.
Did either of them ever know how you felt?
Probably not. Your heart was guarded, intensely so, and you’d never lay your feelings bare and out so easily. You weren’t the type of person to say you loved people as easily as others did, even within your own family.
This, you presume, is probably an acquired trait, now that you think about it. You were much more different as a child, free with praise and love and unabashed affection as well as appreciation for the people around you. What changed?
(Everything.)
You miss 2010. You miss Tsumiki the way you miss your mother’s cooking, miss her the way you miss when you wrote emails and letters and text messages to her with multi-coloured pens or your old phone that eventually broke a year after. You miss the conversations the two of you had, miss how you used to be your parents’ little angel.
And in the end it all comes back to that, doesn’t it? 2010. Nostalgia. Reminiscing on old memories in a way akin to how the elderly do in their youth. That just made you seem more pathetic, because, weren’t you supposed to be making those memories right now, at this time of your life?
You’re a teenager. You should be going out with friends, and having fun, not rotting at home ruminating on the past, with the only friends you’ve ever had hundreds of kilometres away from you (you weren’t sure if you could even call one of them a ‘friend’ anymore), and your acquaintances not close enough to replace them (how could they ever? How could there ever be a replacement for Yuuji?)
In a way you feel your life is miserable: awkward, socially-impaired teenage girl with her only friend practically out of her life at this point; nothing special to your name besides a cursed technique that most times does you more harm than good; stuck not being able to completely get over friends she met at eight who left her as quickly as someone can blink their eyes; with the thinking process of a nagging, stubborn mother sometimes, or if not that then a blurry, mingled train of thought that gets delayed or lost when moving from station to station; someone not of use at all. Not miserable, you think to yourself like a slap to the face, pathetic.
You’re not sure how Tsumiki is now— maybe she has a partner, or better friends than you were, or she’s busy being president of the student council or something (she’d be a sterling leader, of that you’re certain, that girl who you’d always known was bound to go places in the span of her lifetime).
Hopefully, she’s alright, and doing the best she can in life. That’s all you wish for when it comes to Tsumiki.
At this point, there’s no point in wishing to join them, or to linger on them and memories of the past. It’s a mosquito in summer heat, which is why, if it stays, you decide, you’ll just suppress and ignore it until it goes away. Even if you didn’t know how long it would take you to get over them— weeks, months, but goodness forbid a whole lifetime or forever— you needed to accept that you’d be like this for nearly the rest of your life: pathetic, lonely— ah, that’s the word that so very perfectly delineates the situation you’re in— and then some.
So that’s why, when you hear your phone buzzing on your bed like a cicada during a balmy night, you assume it’s someone else. Yuuji must be busy settling in (he’s been texting you, and you took that as a sign that he wouldn’t call), and Megumi must be… —Well. Megumi has made a promise, and it’s not that you don’t believe in him, but it would be better to expect less than what you’d like to in order to evade disappointment.
Must be someone else. A prank call, or a scammer, or something. Or a telemarketer, but you’d be surprised if telemarketers were calling you and not your father. And you were never one to pick calls up mindlessly anyway, so if it were some stranger out to get you or swindle you, you’d just hang up or check the number.
If not either a scam or a telemarketer (well you suppose both of those could be scams in certain contexts), though, then you’d suspect it would be either Yuuji (Yuuji’s the one who has been texting you, after all, conversations strewn over checking in with the other over the past few hours or snippets of advice from you telling him not to bother Megumi very much, and to be cautious and keep himself safe) or Gojo— definitely not Megumi, and probably not Gojo either, but still it was more likely that Gojo was calling you instead of Megumi, so you’re considering it— and you can’t really remember Gojo’s number anyway, so what if an unknown number wasn’t a prank call or something—
You wonder if you should just pick it up instead of burying your head in your study notes and overthinking everything.
But you know it’s definitely not Megumi.
You check the phone.
Well, you’ll be damned.
It’s Fushiguro Megumi.
You know his number by heart, after all. Keyed it in too many times to forget, and it’s not like he’d have any reason to change it. Not with the way he cares for things, inanimate objects, not with the tenderly quiet, secretly caring, emotionally jaded way he maintains them.
“Ah… hello?”
Your heart thumps in your chest and heat flares up in your cheeks with a frenetic speed.
“Hi,” you blurt out, shakily. You’re sure your voice is quivering, yet your mind feels like it’s barely functioning, almost about to drown in a seven-feet-deep pool, so you can’t really tell. You can’t really hear yourself.
You don’t know why you feel like this— no, you know exactly why, actually. It’s because you haven’t gotten over him. Your thoughts are scrambled but you know, for sure, that you’re like this because you want to get rid of feelings like these but you can’t. Or because you’ve been saying that to yourself like a mantra, for so long, even though a part of you wants it to stay— out of what, that’s what you don’t know; maybe desperation or nostalgia or an inability to stop dwelling on days long gone. But you know what this is— you’ve seen the movies, read the manga, watched the dramas. It’s romance. Crushes. Something you’re not quite able to call love yet, something you’re too scared to properly name, still, but something you can understand is one-sided nonetheless.
“…hi. [Name].”
“Hello…”
What happens when two estranged childhood friends with a book’s worth of history behind their relationship that happen to be socially awkward teenagers actually have a conversation semi-beyond what keeps them estranged in the first place?
“Hi— no, wait… how are you?”
Pot, meet kettle, because you’re going off nothing but the fact that you’re at the very least surprised (the other emotions are too complicated to explain) that he’s speaking to you again, and not just on text, but he’s calling, and he sounds like he’s reading off a script, but the script is in a whole other language, somehow, and the uncertain nervousness in his voice is tangible, even for a deep, low voice like his.
Script or not, you appreciate the effort, though.
“I’m good, um… I’m happy you were able to call. It’s been a long time.”
“That’s good.”
There’s silence on the other line; time feels like it’s moving achingly slowly. But you’re mildly happy.
Not happy, maybe, but you definitely feel light, as if you’ve been severed from the heaviness of everything else that has happened lately. This is the first time in years something like this has ever happened.
“Ah, wait, I forgot to ask! Sorry, um.. how are you?”
“I’m doing alright, too. Oh, wait, I should apologise. I didn’t tell you— thanks for helping with my injuries the other day. Gojo told me about it after you left. You… you didn’t have to, though. You shouldn’t have risked your health like that.”
You shake your head. “Don’t mention it. You know why I do this, anyway.” Out of necessity or a need to be useful, you’re not even sure yourself, but he must know, to some degree, right? It seems as if he’d be the one to know the most of this, of you— at least, when matters came to this. “And I’ll be fine, don’t worry. Dr Ieiri probably ended up helping more with the bigger ones once the three of you got back. I mean, she did, right?”
“…no. She said that she didn’t want to waste her time, so if injuries were more minor like mine, she wouldn’t heal them fully.”
“...ah.” More minor? Seriously, doctor? You’d normally not question her judgement over matters that she had more expertise in dealing with, but seriously?
“I’ll be fine, though. Most of the bandages have come off, and all.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
You wonder where he is now, on the bed, maybe, or sitting on the floor. You’ve seen the classrooms, but not the dormitories— you hope wherever he is, that it’s comfortable. That he’s okay.
“We’re going to see a new student soon.”
“Really? Have you met them before?”
“No, but Gojo said she’s from the countryside. But we’re meeting her in Harajuku, for some reason.”
“Oh, Harajuku! I miss it,” you let out a plaintive sigh, “I can’t wait to be back in Tokyo. You know, whatever happens, I still love that city like nothing else. I know how many people hate it, but I love it so much.” And you love it so much in the first place, mostly because of Megumi and Tsumiki. “Maybe she just wants to chase a bit of the sweet city life— I mean, you know how it is when country bumpkins go to the city for the first time… kind of. Or when they love the city— yeah, that’s a better way of saying it. I was like that, kind of.”
“...if you’re worried about the train ride here and want to travel alone, I could always pay for you. Uh… wait—”
“Oh, no, no! There’s no need, uhm— thank you anyway, it’s just—”
“It’s Gojo’s money anyway.”
“Pft,” you snort. Anything to seep out some of Gojo’s money like gluttonous leeches, right? “Nah, I’ll be fine. I mean, I don’t even think I’ll be able to come back in a few years’ time, and by then I won’t even be relying on my parents’ money for this stuff anymore— I mean, I will still be relying on their money, but I’ll be managing it as my own.”
He chuckles lightly over the line, the silent way he shows his emotions, the way that goes unnoticed if one is not attentive to it. It feels like he’s whispering directly into your ear, and the heat on your face (which you weren’t even sure was still there until that point). Your heart skips a beat and it completely, absolutely shocks you. “...the offer still stands.”
Yeah, you can get behind it if he’s like this now. What happened to him, anyway? Puberty hit him like a brick and gave him, like, one more ounce of emotional maturity?
You shake your head like a character in a piece of crappy romance fanfiction. No way. Not now, at least. Calm down.
(...you’re just a girl.)
“Well, no take backs from now on, okay? Even if it’s, like, five years into the future, you’ll still be using Gojo’s credit card to cover for all my travel expenses.”
He does it again, that low, soft, attractive sound. Makes you want to hit him and hit yourself at the same time, and then kick your feet up in the air giddily, and then throttle yourself, if it were possible, out of sheer embarrassment. “Yeah.”
You’re having the time of your life.
“Anyway, how is everything else? Like, are your studies and grades okay? Is the training you do alright to handle?”
“My grades are pretty okay,” he answers, “Not like Gojo cares, honestly. And the training’s fine, it’s nothing I’m not used to.”
“Gojo seems like he’d be a good teacher. When he wants to, he can command respect pretty easily, too. I guess he just… chooses not to. But I saw it yesterday, when you and Yuuji were passed out in the hospital.”
It still strikes a pang of guilt in your chest, your inability to have done anything else besides calling Gojo over for help.
“...I suppose he does.”
“Yeah.”
“How about you? Itadori, he… he can be an idiot sometimes, but he speaks of you really admirably. He talks about how smart you are a lot.”
The thought of Megumi calling Yuuji an idiot of all things doesn’t feel like it falls short from him, but it still makes you frown— though, you realise that that’s just his way of expressing things, because in a way he’d treated you somewhat the same in the past, even if he hadn’t shown it outright or expressed it very vividly. Classic Megumi.
“Hey, he’s smarter than people give him credit for, okay? Wait until you see how talented he is at things other than sports and martial arts. You’d be surprised after trying the meatballs he makes. Would be good if you asked him to give you the recipe sometime; I make them, like, once a week, at least.”
He sighs, “...I will. But the point is, he cares for you a lot.”
“Yeah, beautiful soul, that guy. Loves people the way curious children love nature.”
“That would be a fitting way to put it.”
“How are the dogs?”
“My shikigami?”
“Yeah. Do they have names?”
“The black one is Kuro and the white one is Shiro.”
“You named them black and white?”
“Look, I named them when I was barely six years old, and six year olds aren’t exactly the best when it comes to these things…”
You giggle, “So the name stuck?”
“Yeah, sort of.”
Real cute.
“What about your father? How is he?”
“He’s okay, but, well. I guess we’re not that close anymore.”
“...I see.” He probably can’t imagine a version of you who wasn’t immensely close to her parents. You couldn’t then, either.
“We’ve been talking even less now that my mother’s in the hospital, but at least I get to talk to him before he eats, maybe. I’ve been doing most of the cooking now that my mother isn’t here and my father doesn’t really know how to handle himself in our kitchen without her guidance.”
“Oh… if you don’t mind me asking, what happened to your mother?”
“Cancer.”
You can practically hear the gulp he’s taking, the bobbing of his throat— sensitive topic. “I’m… so sorry to hear that.”
“It’s okay, don’t be,” you reassure him, “I should have told you that day anyway. I was just… exploding at everybody on that night. I should apologise— I’m sorry for how badly I treated you.”
“No,” he goes, “No, you shouldn’t. I understand why you were like that that night. And it was mostly my fault, too, so…”
“No, no, I’m serious! Feel free to ask almost anything as long as I have actual answers to your questions and all.”
“Still… I just wanted to know. Sorry if I caused you any trouble.”
“No— you didn’t do any of that at all, don’t worry! I’m alright with people asking about this. Ah, anyway… besides Yuuji, do you have any friends?”
“Itadori and I aren’t friends.”
“Trust me, if I asked him, I bet he’d beg to differ. Yuuji’s like that with people— soon he’ll be more important to you than you could have ever thought at first.”
“Whatever you say,” he sort of grunts, “But I don’t have any friends, I think… except you, maybe. What about you?”
You were honestly expecting him not to consider you a friend at all, and at this point so much has happened that wouldn’t even be that bothered if he no longer thought of you as one but called you anyway out of his commitment to his promises, or as an apology.
“I’m surprised you can still call me a friend,” you say. Calling people instead of talking to them physically does something to your inhibitions.
“...should I not?”
“No, no, I’m happy,” you say over the phone. You’ll forget this conversation tomorrow, at least, when the sun has risen and the night returns back the hold you have over yourself, your composure, to you. You’ll act like this never happened. So you’ll say whatever you want to now, disgorging yourself of years of withheld secrets. “I’m happy that we’re still friends. I think I like that.
“Yeah?”
“Um— yeah, it seems like a good place to start,” you grin slightly. “And I, well. I don’t really have any friends beyond Yuuji,” —You’re not even sure if Tsumiki still sees you as a friend— “Even if I may have acquaintances like Sasaki or Iguchi it still feels like Yuuji’s one of the only people I can give that kind of title to, so, um… the more the merrier?”
“That’s… nice.”
“...it is, isn’t it?”
“Thank you.”
Why? “Okay.”
The two of you go through the next few seconds in silence, time feeling like it’s blending and bleeding into a mix of years and events. You can hear the light, steady sound of his breathing from the other line. If you could, you’d sleep to it— fuck the phone bill, you’ll be the one paying it in your father’s stead this time if it was for this.
It’s comforting, and you don’t want to break it— the quiet. If he can hear you now, can hear how you’re breathing through a smile with your chest only slightly moving, you hope it feels the same as the sound of his breathing did for you. You hope it feels just like home. Like a warm pillow in the one place you love the most that you bury your head into when the weather gets especially cold.
“Fushiguro!”
Oh dear.
Wincing at the sound of the creaking door’s shrill shriek as it's opened and then hits the wall, you know exactly who it is— you’d recognise that voice anywhere.
“Is that Yuuji?”
“Oi! I told you not to barge into my room like that!” Megumi shouts.
“Huh? You’re calling someone? Sorry. Wait, is it [Name]?”
“It’s none of your business.”
“Hi, Yuuji.”
“Can I talk to her?”
“Is it alright if we do, Megumi? Just for a few seconds.”
“Fine,” he sighs. You can practically hear that eye roll.
“Yo!” he cheers.
“Has everything been okay lately?” you ask.
“Yeah. We’re meeting a new student soon.”
“Ah, yeah. Megumi told me.”
“—Oh, and my uniform came in! It looks pretty neat.”
“That’s good. Maybe you can send me a picture once you start wearing it, then.”
“I will!”
Things are going better than you thought they would.
21-6-2018
It’s been a few days now.
You don’t know Sasaki and Iguchi well enough to call them friends, but the three of you do know each other. You had never decided to change any contacts with them, and considering that they and you were never closer than acquaintances, friends of a friend— you had never really regretted it. But now that Yuuji is gone— and you know he’s not dead, but still— you wonder whether you should have gotten closer to them, just to be less alone once Yuuji left, even if it could not be the way things were with Yuuji. (“I thought I was a pretty lonely guy, and sometimes I still do. Like— I mean, you’re a lonely girl too sometimes, I think,” he had told you as you patched him up.)
Still, Yuuji and you were two peas in a pod— so they’re bound to ask what happened to him soon enough, especially Iguchi.
You’ll have to start getting used to spending your Thursdays alone. And then you’d have to start getting used to every other day without him, too. If you went to the arcade or watched movies or sing-screamed the lyrics to English songs you don’t know the Japanese translations of without his presence there, you know how it wouldn’t feel the same. In life it’s not what you do that matters, you’ve come to realise— it’s who you’re doing these things with. That’s what puts meaning to it all and makes all things done in your life worthwhile.
The two of them pass you by during lunch.
“[Last Name]? —Oh, hey!” Sasaki says as she turns around.
You almost scream and run away like a mouse fleeing from the eyes of a vicious house cat, tremors in your voice. “Hello…”
“Where’s Yuuji, by the way? The occult club’s going to fall apart without him.”
You pause. “He transferred to another school…”
“Huh?” she goes, Iguchi almost reeling back in shock. “Transferred? But why? We’ve barely even made it to the middle of the year!”
“I… I don’t know, it was something really urgent,”
23-6-2018
Your room is a cluttered mess— lucky as you are that it’s the weekend, the past week has been a rollercoaster that knocked your room’s usual standard of cleanliness off track. Scattered all over your desk were worksheets, notebooks, graph paper pages and foolscap paper, chicken-scratch writing and meticulous notes scribbled all over them to compensate for your absence the day after the incident took place.
It isn’t the time or the discipline you lack— it’s just that it’s going to be awfully tedious. You’ll have to wipe your desk again, and clean the walls, and sort through all your clothes, too, since you haven’t been folding them in any way that isn’t merely fastidious and nearly careless. So as you get to work, you suppose that calling someone wouldn’t hurt.
Maybe you could call Megumi. That would be okay.
For the past few years, you’ve never noticed it. So when you do, it hits you like a bullet train at the fastest of speeds.
You miss him. Not just in the way you miss 2010, the way you miss the past, the way you miss and mourn the person you used to be. It had been so obvious for Tsumiki, but not for him, and now that you know this it’ll be another quiet revelation— another rediscovery of fragments of yourself concealed by memories.
You miss him— all of him; you yearned to be his friend again because he was unlike Tsumiki who you knew cherished you as you did her; you miss him regardless of who he is now, because somewhere inside him is the boy who read dog books and brought you to the school library and ran your finger through water when you burned it. Somewhere inside him is the person who offered to hold your bag as he walked with you through a snowy garden, and helped you when your nose bled.
So it would be okay to call Megumi right now.
“Fushiguro speaking.”
“Hi, Megumi. Are you busy?”
“Not right now.”
“Want to call?”
“Fushiguro!” It’s Yuuji. “Wanna go—”
“I said I’m not going!”
You chuckle, “Be nice. Were the two of you supposed to go somewhere?”
“Nothing important. Gojo said he wanted us to ‘bond’ with each other, so he concluded that we could watch a movie. Some kind of gory horror film or something.”
He’s… actually making an obvious effort not to scold Yuuji that much or call him some insulting, derogatory term this time… wow.
“Ah, yeah. Yuuji likes his horror movies.”
“Anyway, anything urgent you wanted to tell me?”
“No, I’m just… uh—” you laugh nervously, “I’m just a little bored.” Nowadays you’re not really sure what he’d do— scold you, maybe, or roll his eyes so hard that you can hear it over the line, or he may even flash into a quick bit of awkwardness and hesitation through his words.
Or maybe— and this was the worst of it all, he’d ask why you were calling him, and his bouts of awkwardness would have only been something temporary, soon to be replaced once again by anger and annoyance, the same he gives to everyone else— even if you knew he didn’t always mean it, per se. No more special treatment for you.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, uh… I have to clean, and usually it’s not as much as what I have to do today, so I just thought that since the only other person in the house is my father and we don’t really talk much anymore, we could, um… chat for a while. Yeah.”
“Okay.”
“Uh-huh, so.” You stand up, leaving your phone on your desk and putting the call on speaker mode. The mountain of papers and books is a wasteland and your desk has been degraded to a landfill— the state of it would make your mother a wailing mess— no, she’d faint instantly as soon as she saw it, becoming worse of a mess than the table itself was. “Anything interesting happened lately?”
“Not really.”
“Oh—! Yuuji sent me a picture of his uniform the other day. Was that one special?”
“Yeah. But they let students make adjustments to the uniform, and he said he hadn’t changed anything, so I think that was Gojo’s doing.”
“Oh, well, that’s Gojo. It suits him, though, right? Not to sound mean or be presumptuous, but…” you chuckle, “When you wear the uniform, you look so formal. It’s not a bad thing— it’s just that Yuuji’s just always been more casual like that. And the red of the hoodie goes with his hair, too!”
“I guess so.”
“I can’t imagine you wearing anything other than the default uniform, though. Not to insult you, I mean, you still look good in the normal uniform, I just— can’t imagine it.” You remark, sorting the materials and books by size and subject. You’ve got to handle some of the drawers, too, now that you’ve started and can’t stop your momentum just yet. You can already feel the dust particles that have gathered on whatever is inside them still, jostling around once you’ve taken them out.
“If you’re going to say it like that, you can just say it outright.”
“No, no! I mean that I just can’t imagine you wearing, like, Yuuji’s uniform. Wait, what do the other students’ uniforms look like?”
“The second years?”
“Yeah. Did they choose the normal ones?”
“Inumaki did. They have three boys and one girl, but only two of the boys wear the normal uniform. Okkotsu has a special uniform in white.”
“Oh, I see,” you nod your head, “It’s a nice uniform, though. I wish I could wear a uniform that pretty.”
“You could always enrol yourself here,” he suggests, “They’d welcome you with open arms.”
“Maybe they will,” you chuckle, “But my mother would be adamant on me staying in the ‘normal’ world. She’s unyielding like that.”
“And your father?”
“Wouldn’t mind, at least I don’t think…” you say, “I’ll have to wonder when to tell him if I do end up in jujutsu high; you never know when he’s mad. He’s always unpredictable like that nowadays and it’s not… particularly pleasant.”
“I see. It would be good if you were here, though. You would be closer to Dr Ieiri that way. And it would do good, because, um… well, I’d like you here. You’d be… good for the people around you here.”
“Ah, you— you would?” you ask, slightly phased— not like he hasn’t been a bit nicer to you since you’ve seen him again (maybe it was the awkwardness, maybe it was the guilt). “Thank you,” you say, the corners of your mouth tugging up sheepishly, heading to the dusty drawer (you haven’t touched it in what feels like years, usually excluding it from your list of things to clean).
After a scrupulous amount of wiping away at the dust outside of and surrounding it, you open the drawer with a slight bit of anticipation— you don’t expect much, but you’re a person who lingers on the past like a ghost that has forgotten how time has passed. There wouldn’t be much in this drawer to reminisce on, you presume, but you still approach it with an eager fascination— you’re the type to do so, after all.
Of everything there, the most noteworthy are two things you grabbed almost immediately— you could never forget how they felt, and the weight that they held in your life back then: a letter, addressed but never delivered to the person you were talking to right now, and a cigarette with a hastily scribbled slew of numbers on it and a lipstick mark on its end.
Oh, that letter. That letter.
From what you remember, you’ve never rebelled against your parents before. At least, not with anything major— for a long time, you were their good girl, and you never disobeyed them, as much as you wanted to at times. You still are, still stuck with that age-old drive to be useful. (But was there even a point in that anymore? At least, was there one with your parents?). You didn’t picture yourself as any kind of righteous goody-two-shoes, but you definitely weren’t a rebel or a delinquent. You followed their instructions and seldom ever questioned what they told you, and so it had always been subtly implanted in your brain that they would be alright with anything you did or said. Yet the first time you did actually start to question them, you realised that their belief in your ‘obedience’ as pure love— and maybe it was; you loved them so much you were blinded and trusted them with everything and did anything they wanted their baby to do— you realised they only treated you so lovingly if you were not an actual person with your own ideals and beliefs.
(But they still loved you, right?)
Even now, you still do obey them and listen to them. If your father needed anything, he could consider it done; if your mother wanted her clothes to be patched up you’d try your utmost best to withstand the pricking of needles and bring it back to her hospital room with bandaged fingers. It was like that with your mother: even if at times it seemed like the only pain she wanted for you was callouses from a pen or pricks from needles, at other times you feel she could have known you’d end up like her, maybe. Maybe she saw it as a curse: the worlds the two of you were born in were different, and she wanted you to stay in yours, lest you die or live in a world of endless pain.
You’ve been doing it for a long time: being dismissive of yourself, prone to self-prostration, subservient; the lovingness of a mother, the sweetness of a teenage girl (you hoped), the kindness of a caring friend. Maybe it was Tsumiki— maybe it was because you’d always seen this in Tsumiki. She was always smiling, always caring; taking on the weight of motherhood before she could carry the weight of her school bag. Hugging you with her saccharine smile; braiding her hair with gentle hands and holding your wrist with her hair tie on it even gentler. (You still have it with you. You had planned to start taking it off more once Yuuji left, but you suppose some habits take longer than a week to develop.) All while having that sickening, fantastical, mysterious sweetness of a teenage girl in what you now understand could have been a hidden misery— because caring for someone like a mother while suppressing the thoughts that spoke to you to act like a child was something you wanted to replicate until you realised you understood it. And then you no longer wanted to recreate it. (Maybe that was the way it was for every woman or girl you knew: watching someone you loved hurt themself or not being able to do anything to prevent it when they started. Life was a cycle that way. A very annoying, frustrating one full of unfortunate circumstances and wrongly-picked out decks of cards.)
“…you know what? I think I may be able to come,” you tell him.
“You don’t have to go against your father for our sake.”
“No, don’t worry about it. I think I know who to ask for help. Thank you, Megumi.”
“Hi, Dr Ieiri?”
“Kid? That you?” she goes, the slightest bit of excitement stark against her usual deadpan tone. “I thought you’d never call because of that old man.”
“Haha, yeah— sorry to disturb you, but, um, Dr Ieiri? I may want to take you up on that offer, by the way, but um, I’m still on the fence. I mean, I know I want to be like you and do what you do but… I don’t know, I’m not quite sure about leaving the two of them alone here and all. But anyway, I just called you because I wanted to ask if there was, you know, any way you could get me to Tokyo somehow. I need to pass something to someone, but, um… I guess I’m going with this with the hope that I’ll change my mind and join you. But I’m… perpetually on the fence for now, I guess.”
“Pft,” she snorts, “You little rebel, I’m in. I’ll see what I can do.”
“Thank you so much.”
24-6-2018
The decision and the plan were made as swiftly as you could.
You decide to tell your father— you wouldn’t want to deceive him, after all. At least, you’d give him a quick notice. And then you’d leave. Like a snowflake before the first day of spring. He’ll probably tell your mother.
“I’m leaving for Tokyo for a while,” you say, “I’ll be back before you can even realise I’m gone. Invitation from Dr Ieiri.”
25-6-2018
“Why?” your father asks, the night before you leave. He suggested going out together at least once before you left. He always knew when you were making white lies.
“I guess that maybe I’m just too much like you, Daddy.”
For the first time in years he hugs you on the doorstep, patting you on the back on the day you’re set to leave. “Make sure you study and work hard,” he reminds you.
“I’m leaving for Tokyo,” you announce.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving us for a boy,” she goes, rolling her eyes. She doesn’t even blink.
“I’m not.” You are.
“You know, your father travelled all over the country to see me again after we’d first met.”
“Oh. Okay?”
“And he’s always been dedicated to his job and dedicated to helping people.”
“Uh huh.”
“I’m saying that the two of you are very similar. I’ve lived through this story before,” she states, “And you look just like your father right now.” your mother says. She hasn’t smiled the way she used to— you remember it vividly, that vibrant gleam in her, the liveliest and loveliest of life— in ages and you don’t think she will, not now of all times.
“Really? Sometimes he says I take after you more.”
“You will.”
It doesn’t feel like a curse. Even if it usually would make your heart well up in guilt, it doesn’t feel like a curse.
Maybe she knows that her time is running out. Maybe this is resignation. Whatever it is, you hold her hand first, but you’re also the first one to let the other go, your fingers slipping away from hers. You leave the door for the last time in a while, making another round in your life of that carousel of abandonment and reuniting and departures.
25-6-2018
Dr Ieiri greets you with a calm smile on her pallid face.
“Good to see you again.”
“It’s good to be back here,” you sigh.
It is.
You keep your hand on your other hand’s wrist, holding them in front of you. The cherry hair tie on it feels warm against your skin as you exit the station, summer heat embracing it softly.
taglist:
@bakananya, @sindulgent666, @shartnart1, @lolmais, @mechalily, @pweewee, @notsaelty, @nattisbored
(please send an ask/state in the notes if you'd like to join! if I can't tag your username properly, I've written it in italics. so sorry for any trouble!)
#WE'RE FINALLY ON TRACK WITH THE AO3 VER WOOO!!#jjk x reader#take me back (take me with you)#jjk megumi#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#megumi fushiguro#megumi#fushiguro megumi#megumi fluff#megumi angst#fushiguro megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro x reader#jjk x fem!reader#fem!reader#ruer writes#megumi x reader#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen x y/n#megumi imagine#fanfiction#jjk fanfiction
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one thing I have learned about being poor is that you cannot for a moment stop thinking about it
#theres no peace#every little thing reminds me we are poor#seeing friends having electricity wifi heat food gas. it all costs money. and bills and fees and charges happen all the damn time#im constantly worried that i am measing up somehow or im not keeping track of my finances properly#the person handling our disability assistance application keeps coming back with question after question about my job#and i have so much doubt and fear that ive made some mistake in my answers that will disqualify us from support#and theres this sick backwards stupid thing where applying for and being on disability support is discouraging me from trying to make money#because the more i make the less likely we'll get support but i need to make money to live#its just fucked. and once we're on support i have to make monthly reports of my income so ill feel like im explaining myself all the fuckin#time#cus the system isnt built in a way that makes sense for self employed ppl who have business expenses to account for#sorry for the ranting i cant sleep#truly truly i think poverty is making me a worse persin#more anxious more resentful more jealous more miserable more spiteful#i have so little and there is so little i can do to help it#i want things in a more desparate and even childish way than i used to eant things#spend a lot more time fantasizing about magically having expendable income#not to mention the constant exponential guilt that comes from asking for help or recieving help. its guilt i need to unlearn but i feel it
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Aromantic Squad I need your help because words fail me. Describe the difference between a Normal Friendship, a Squish (a crush but for desire to be homies), and a QPR (if that's thing you do/consider). Thank you.
#aromantic#arospec#aro#i can give context but its kind of roundabout so long story short:#i made new friends from an audition (longer story) (im a pro-thespian) (yes im a loser) and they do NOT get it#and im trying to explain it but it keeps getting back to 'but isnt that a boyfriend?'#NO thats a HOMIE. and one of them is asexual so my 'romance is just sexy friendship' bit didnt work either bcuz he was like#then whats friends with benefits. I DONT KNOW I just go here.#anyway tbc theyre all chill. we're pro theatre kids okay this is a safe space.#but i just. can't articulate it.#and im irish so it usually just turns into me saying something riddled with catholic guilt in the middle and we get off track#these are british ppl btw theyre so lame. but in a cool friend way. whatever you dont need my fucking autobio just rb the post#im allergic to shutting the fuck up
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Monkey’s Paw pages 133-136 ( START HERE || ao3 || previous || next ) AU after episode 62. The Omega Dads try a more desperate gambit, but careful what you wish for. Our dads find alternate versions of themselves in a strange dreamscape. Ifyou die in the dream, doyou die in real life?
...heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyy
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#fanart#what the heck happened last summer? uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh#anyones guess really#i other news s2 has been validating some of my plans for this comic in INSANE ways#hyped to be smug about it#also comfort drawing feels nice#i needed this back in my life#and i will no longer be spending my lunches being social in any way so i should have more drawing time! that turns into a plus i guess#i did some of this drawing during a lunch#also will be doing other job during lunch#monkeys paw#kineticallyart#if something looks worng or is missing uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh no it doesnt#its a dream we're fine#darryl totally hasn't forgotten that he should be bleeding right now nope#for the record it wasnt JUST the daunting amount of detail effort#that frankly i was losing track of#that made me take so long to get back to this#but its not NOT that yknow?#i decided i care more about pacing myself and getting it out than making it Perfect#which was always the goal with this thing
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Not Wednesday Wip
posting this little thing because the wonderful @novasillies tagged me (guys guys go read her fic please please please please please it’s SO GOOD) as well as the lovely @gege-wondering-around (I am so so sorry i’m always so late for these things life has been so busy). here’s something else from my time travel au (also called the rewrite the lines au)
By the time he reaches the Nemeton, dawn is breaking on the horizon. Soon, the world will wake up, and Stiles plans to be long gone by then, least the Hales hear him.
The Nemeton’s energy is strong today, overpowering the Nogitsune’s rage and cruel persuasion. It hums inside Stiles’s whole being, and Stiles lets it wash over him before sending it back, like a feedback loop. It’s a learned behavior, allowing its energy to flow through him. Before, he’d been way too scared of it, of what it could do, of what it had already done. Now, Stiles knows he’s way more powerful than anything else that’s ever touched this tree. There’s no need to be afraid of what has made him what he is today, for no matter how monstrous, Stiles will always be worse.
Without hesitating, he presses his palm flat against the top of the tree stump. He doesn’t push any of his magic in it, simply letting it flow freely. It’s intense, though not hurtful. It recognizes Stiles as its friend, not its foe, no matter what Stiles may feel towards it.
As he lets the Nemeton’s magic flood his senses, Stiles idly wonders when it became such a normal thing for him to refer to a tree as a sentient being. It’s not as if the Nemeton talks to him, it simply… conveys its energy. And the call is more of a pull than an outright calling, if he’s getting specific about it. Yet Stiles knows without a doubt that it is sentient, even if it doesn’t have things such as feelings or emotions.
He keeps his hand on the tree stump for as long as he can, holding steady through the endless stream of information being imputed straight into his head by his semi-symbiotic relationship with the Nemeton even though his head starts to pound and his breathe starts coming out in heavy, loud puffs of air. In fact, Stiles only pulls away when the cold, nauseatingly familiar feel of dark energy, of chaos and pain and strife starts creeping in. Even though Stiles knows it can’t be true, that it must be his mind playing tricks on him again, he can’t help but startle when he hears voices in the wind, a whispered let me in that has his heart beating erratically and his eyes jumping from shadow to shadow. In the lazy light of the still rising sun, he can almost swear he sees a firefly.
Stiles leaves without looking back. Maybe if he ignores this problem, it will finally fucking go away.
If not… well. That’s a problem for future Stiles to take care of.
just a little something about stiles trying to deal with one of the million problems he has. it's going... well. it's not really going. no-pressure tagging @dontcallpanic @oldefashioned @salty-fryingpan @hedwig221b @dear-massacre @endwersed @novasillies @gege-wondering-around and of course anyone else who wants to do it!
#stiles is barely holding his shit together but it will get better I swear#eventually#for now he'll suffer#anyways we're on the last track so as soon as I finish my hellish midterms week I'll get back to writing#sterek#rewrite the lines au#stiles stilinski#teen wolf#fanfic#teen wolf fanfic#sterek fanfic#my writing#my wip
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Its actually extremely important to me that Ajax is the one who nominated Rembrandt to be a Warrior purely because it means shes being a giant hypocrite when she's mad that Swan brought her new girlfriend into the gang <3
#ajax: fast-tracking your crush to join your gang is only okay when i do it actually#this is complicated by the fact that Rembrandt does like Mercy and is not backing Ajax up here#ive entered my blogging about warriors stuff that never actually happens in the text era#we're gonna be here for a while#warriors musical
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thyere taking pictures of the beautiful sunrise
#the inspo track is under the cut man i love it sm smsmsm#we're so back on the track chat i can feel the drawing power is coming back to me after MONTHS#vtm#vampire the masquerade#redswa draws
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In a world where you can only see color once you find your soulmate, TK is still reeling from having his heart broken when Carlos Reyes suddenly bursts into his life.
Rating: T (Rating may change in the future)
Read Chapter 5 here on AO3!
Ch. 1 || Ch. 2 || Ch. 3 || Ch. 4 ||
A massive thank you to @emsprovisions for the new banner 💜
#tarlos#tarlos fanfiction#911 lone star fanfiction#tk strand#carlos reyes#finally back with an update for this fic#after ten thousand years#Legit thought I wasn't gonna finish it for a hot second#but nope#we're back on track#lana writes something#WE'RE BACK BITCHES
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