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[camberwellcosmetics]

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[jewishvitya]

A pro-Palestine Jew on tiktok asked those of us who were raised pro-Israel, what got us to change our minds on Palestine. I made a video to answer (with my voice, not my face), and a few people watched it and found some value in it. I'm putting this here too. I communicate through text better than voice.

So I feel repetitive for saying this at this point, but I grew up in the West Bank settlements. I wrote this post to give an example of the extent to which Palestinians are dehumanized there.

Where I live now, I meet Palestinians in day to day life. Israeli Arab citizens living their lives. In the West Bank, it was nothing like that. Over there, I only saw them through the electric fence, and the hostility between us and Palestinians was tangible.

When you're a child being brought into the situation, you don't experience the context, you don't experience the history, you don't know why they're hostile to you. You just feel "these people hate me, they don't want me to exist." And that bubble was my reality. So when I was taught in school that everything we did was in self defense, that our military is special and uniquely ethical because it's the only defensive military in the world - that made sense to me. It slotted neatly into the reality I knew.

One of the first things to burst the bubble for me was when I spoke to an old Israeli man and he was talking about his trauma from battle. I don't remember what he said, but it hit me wrong. It conflicted with the history as I understood it. So I was a bit desperate to make it make sense again, and I said, "But everything we did was in self defense, right?"

He kinda looked at me, couldn't understand at all why I was upset, and he went, "We destroyed whole villages. Of course we did. It was war, that's what you do."

And that casual "of course" stuck with me. I had to look into it more.

I couldn't look at more accurate history, and not at accounts by Palestinians, I was too primed against these sources to trust them. The community I grew up in had an anti-intellectual element to it where scholars weren't trusted about things like this.

So what really solidified this for me, was seeing Palestinian culture.

Because part of the story that Israel tells us to justify everything, is that Palestinians are not a distinct group of people, they're just Arabs. They belong to the nations around us. They insist on being here because they want to deny us a homeland. The Palestinian identity exists to hurt us. This, because the idea of displacing them and taking over their lands doesn't sound like stealing, if this was never theirs and they're only pretending because they want to deprive us.

But then foods, dances, clothing, embroidery, the Palestinian dialect. These things are history. They don't pop into existence just because you hate Jews and they're trying to move here. How gorgeous is the Palestinian thobe? How stunning is tatreez in general? And when I saw specific patterns belonging to different regions of Palestine?

All of these painted for me a rich shared life of a group of people, and countered the narrative that the Palestininian identity was fabricated to hurt us. It taught me that, whatever we call them, whatever they call themselves, they have a history in this land, they have a right to it, they have a connection to it that we can't override with our own.

I started having conversations with leftist friends. Confronting the fact that the borders of the occupied territories are arbitrary and every Israeli city was taken from them. In one of those conversations, I was encouraged to rethink how I imagine peace.

This also goes back to schooling. Because they drilled into us, we're the ones who want peace, they're the ones who keep fighting, they're just so dedicated to death and killing and they won't leave us alone.

In high school, we had a stadium event with a speaker who was telling us about a person who defected from Hamas, converted to Christianity and became a Shin Bet agent. Pretty sure you can read this in the book "Son of Hamas." A lot of my friends read the book, I didn't read it, I only know what I was told in that lecture. I guess they couldn't risk us missing out on the indoctrination if we chose not to read it.

One of the things they told us was how he thought, we've been fighting with them for so long, Israelis must have a culture around the glorification of violence. And he looked for that in music. He looked for songs about war. And for a while he just couldn't find any, but when he did, he translated it more fully, and he found out the song was about an end to wars. And this, according to the story as I was told it, was one of the things that convinced him. If you know know the current trending Israeli "war anthem," you know this flimsy reasoning doesn't work.

Back then, my friend encouraged me to think more critically about how we as Israelis envision peace, as the absence of resistance. And how self-centered it is. They can be suffering under our occupation, but as long as it doesn't reach us, that's called peace. So of course we want it and they don't.

Unless we're willing to work to change the situation entirely, our calls for peace are just "please stop fighting back against the harm we cause you."

In this video, Shlomo Yitzchak shares how he changed his mind. His story is much more interesting than mine, and he's much more eloquent telling it. He mentions how he was taught to fear Palestinians. An automatic thought, "If I go with you, you'll kill me." I was taught this too. I was taught that, if I'm in a taxi, I should be looking at the driver's name. And if that name is Arab, I should watch the road and the route he's taking, to be prepared in case he wants to take me somewhere to kill me. Just a random person trying to work. For years it stayed a habit, I'd automatically look at the driver's name. Even after knowing that I want to align myself with liberation, justice, and equality. It was a process of unlearning.

On October, not long after the current escalation of violence, I had to take a taxi again. A Jewish driver stopped and told me he'll take me, "so an Arab doesn't get you." Israeli Jews are so comfortable saying things like this to each other. My neighbors discussed a Palestinian employee, with one saying "We should tell him not to come anymore, that we want to hire a Jew." The second answered, "No, he'll say it's discrimination," like it would be so ridiculous of him. And the first just shrugged, "So we don't have to tell him why." They didn't go through with it, but they were so casual about this conversation.

In the Torah, we're told to treat those who are foreign to us well, because we know what it's like to be the foreigner. Fighting back against oppression is the natural human thing to do. We know it because we lived it. And as soon as I looked at things from this angle, it wasn't really a choice of what to support.

[transmaverique]

you're assuming a lot about binary trans people, and if anything it makes me think that our understandings of our genders aren't actually that different? Not every binary trans person wants to pass as a cis person. I don't want to pass as a cis woman, I want people to understand me for what I am, a collection of internal beliefs and thoughts that I've constructed an identity with. It sounds like we both have created identities for ourselves! If you think that non binary people are the only people capable of creating their own identities and striving to be seen as them, that's on you

im gonna try one more time. i cant really tell if youre being sarcastic or not so im gonna assume youre being genuine when you say you think we have similar understandings of gender. but to me it sounds like you are deliberately ignoring the Actual Words i am saying.

we need words to describe our experiences, both different and common ones. those words may be in themselves faulty or somewhat inaccurate, but they are what we have to discuss important concepts, and they function well enough if they have a generally agreed-upon meaning. right?

so. the dominant culture of the imperial core is one of strictly binary sex. anything that breaks this, is deviant of the "rules of nature", to this dominant culture. right?

so then we call people who are NOT of this binary system multiple different things depending on cultural context and personal identity and personal circumstance. right?

'nonbinary' is only one of those words. to each individual it may mean any one of hundreds upon thousands of different things. everyone has their own personal identity, and while we may use the same word to describe said identity, no two people will have the same definition.

this is true of 'manhood' and 'womanhood' as well. every individual, cis trans both neither intersex perisex and so on and so forth, every single one of them has different PERSONAL interpretations of these words and the concepts they are meant to describe.

but 'woman' has to mean something in order to function as a real concept. it has to have some semblance of shared meaning, shared experience, shared conceptual feeling and vibe, for it to work within the imperial core as a means of systemic control and oppression, for it to work as a communicable identity, and for it to function as a word in a language.

in the same vein of thought, 'binary' is a word we are using to describe someone whose gender, in some way, shape, or form, fits into the schema of 'man and woman'. your internal definition of your own gender does not actually matter very much to other people who do not know it exists.

for me, it matters that i am percieved as a binary gender no matter what i do. it matters, and hurts, a lot. and for some people, it matters and hurts less. for some people, it matters and hurts not at all.

whether you consider yourself binary or not is entirely up to you and how you interpret your own navigation of the world. its very strange to act as if im saying anything otherwise. YOU defined YOURSELF as binary in your responding to me. you said you were also agender, so, like i said in my prev tags, i dont think youre the target audience. but the way youre reacting, it seems you think you are. i am also going to reiterate that 'binary' is not a bad thing to be - binary trans people and for that matter, binary cis people, are not my enemies. but i deserve to have the language to talk about my experiences as they compare to binary people. that's all it is.

[jeonginsleftcheek]

Dolly III

~ part 3 of the Dolly series

pairing: lee felix x afab!reader

genre: smut, fluff, elements of horror

synopsis: as a rare doll collector, a unique sex doll piques your interest and you have to own it.

wc: 8.2k

warnings: mentions of bruises, blood and needles, some violence, haunted dolls

nsfw warnings: grinding, praise, lots of kissing, body worship, handjob, cum tasting, oral (m and f), unprotected sex, creampie

~ divider by @bunnysrph

"Good morning, Matilda. Prudence, how do you do? Ah, Mr. Avery. Looking particularly swell today." the dolls stare at you with their big eyes and smiling faces while you greet them just like every day.

Whistling about the kitchen as you prepare breakfast, your life companions are always there to listen to you and bring you comfort.

"You know, we have an exciting new family member arriving to us today. I'm expecting all of you to act polite and give him a warm welcome to his new home." you point your spatula at the dolls that were decorating the kitchen.

"I mean all of you!" you yell out, chuckling after.

"We all know what happens to naughty dolls. You don't want to experience the same scorching punishment they did." you smirk at them and though they are usually silent, it seems like they're even more quiet now.

Alive in your mind, they've heard you and are now shivering in fear but anticipating the arrival of the newest addition to your precious collection.

You really do expect them to be on their best behavior.

Not long after breakfast, your package arrives.

You practically rip open the huge box and tear off all the covers and bubble wrap, throwing them carelessly behind you.

"Oh!" you gasp.

"My my, you're just such a beauty, aren't you?" you smile at the doll staring at you from the box.

"You look like a little angel." your hands cup his cheeks.

"So soft. So sweet. You're going to be perfect for us." you look at him fondly. "Welcome home, Felix."

You lean down to kiss his cute nose, observing the freckles on his face.

He is just stunning, every little crease on him looks perfect and most importantly; he looks alive.

Yes, people might be creeped out by your love of dolls, collecting them, playing with them and hanging out with them but you never cared.

They were everything to you ever since you were a little girl so you spent so much money on getting the most rare and unique dolls you could, even getting a few ones that were supposedly haunted.

The thought of that exhilirated you, and you were convinced all of them were alive especially after you'd find them in different places or hear them giggle and whisper.

You loved that, respected the dolls and their needs but you always let them know that you were the head of the house.

It was going to be the same with this special doll.

As soon as you saw the ad, you wished you could buy all eight of them and have the rarest and craziest collection ever but they were so expensive so you settled on getting only Felix.

He just seemed so sweet and innocent to you, out of all 8 of them, you thought he looked the most doll-like and would go perfectly with your porcelain doll collection; just one of many you had.

You didn't care much that he was a sex doll, but seeing him now up close made you understand the appeal for that too.

You grabbed the manual to skim over it, not really caring about what it says, you were more interested in the letter that was in Felix's hand.

You slowly picked it up and opened it.

Hello,

my name is Felix and I am your comforting doll.

I love cuddles, hugs and kisses, sweets (especially chocolate). And videogames!

Please always keep me close to you as I love to feel your warmth, and no matter what you do with me always end it with a sweet kiss.

"You're a little cuddlebug, hm?" you pout at him. "You're just becoming cuter by the second!"

Finding another paper tucked in the pocket of his jeans, you pull it out and open it too.

My darling!

I'm ready for our first cuddling session!

I hope you bring fluffy pillows and enjoy our first night together.

"Ah! So adorable!" you squeal. "Let me introduce you to everyone." you add, quickly grabbing him and lifting him up.

"Fam, this is Felix, a very special doll. I expect you give him a warm welcome and help him feel at ease here. This is now his home as much as it is yours and I will not tolerate any sour behavior!" you say.

Of course, it's quiet but you know that they've understood you.

One of the ventriloquist dolls lips open and you chuckle.

"Yes, Parker. I know he's pretty. Now close your mouth or you'll catch flies." you chuckle, standing up and making your way to the doll.

With your fingers on its chin, you gently close the wooden doll's mouth.

"Now, where were we? Ah, yes! That outfit is atrocious. But don't worry, sweet Felix. I already prepared clothes that I know will fit your pretty face perfectly." you smirk, hoisting Felix in your arms and lifting him up.

Once you make it to your bedroom, you gently lay him down on your fluffy bed and open your wardrobe, looking at the neatly hung up outfits you had ordered online right after ordering Felix.

The dolls on the shelves all stare at him as you whistle a tune, picking out his outfit.

"This should do it." you grab one of them and make your way towards your bed.

"Let's get you out of this... whatever it is." you grip the hem of his shirt, slowly lifting it up and gasping when you notice his abs.

"Interesting." you poke his stomach and then his side. "I bet you're ticklish." you add, sliding his arms out of the shirt and tossing it aside.

"Oh!" you gasp again, noticing a few freckles on his chest. "You're so precious, Felix." your finger traces his beauty marks gently, almost making you hypnotized.

You snap out of it and unbutton his jeans, pulling the zipper down and feeling your face flush when you realize your touch had aroused the doll.

"Did you get excited, precious dolly?" you giggle at him, before looking around at the other dolls who were fixated on Felix.

"It is rude to stare." you chastise them, but they continue looking as you slide his pants down and toss them on the floor.

"I think you need help with this, Lixie." you chew on your lip as you hook your fingers in his boxers.

As soon as you slide them down, a wave of embarassment washes over you as you stare at his hard cock, glistening at the tip.

It seems that there are a few freckles on his length too and your thighs press together involuntarily.

It's been a while since you've been with someone, most people you tried to date couldn't understand your obsession with dolls and there was no way you were going to choose them over your doll family.

But, seeing that Felix was a doll and a sex doll at that, you didn't see harm in using him for what he's made for.

"We can help each other, but you can forget about putting that inside me." you warn, lifting your dress up and pushing your panties down.

"This will have to suffice, my little Lixie." you giggle as you throw your leg over him and press your wet core against his cock.

Slowly, you start grinding against him, your arousal coating his cock and balls, little whimpers leaving your mouth as you close your eyes and throw your head back.

It really has been so long, and Felix is so warm and pliant, laying under you taking it.

You speed up as you feel your high building up, you look back down at him and notice that his cheeks are rosy, making him look even cuter.

You whimper as you stare at his pretty face, his tip catching onto your clit a few times and almost slipping inside.

"Don't be naughty, Lixie. Or I'll have to punish you." you whine as his cock catches on your entrance, the tip twitching inside you.

It's as if something flashes in his eyes and you whimper loudly, cumming all over his cock and riding your high against his throbbing erection.

"You didn't cum yet?" you pout, remembering there was something about that in the manual.

"Ah, yes, you like having your hair pulled on." you smirk and continue grinding against him, your fingers now tangled in his hair.

"Cum for me, my angel." you pull on his hair and his cock twitches against your wetness before he explodes on his abs, the warm liquid pooling around his belly button and making you more wet as you grind on him once again, his cum smeared on your cunt.

You look at him as you stop your movements, your heart beating fast.

"Look what a mess we made, Lixie." you shake your head before getting up and heading to the bathroom, the dolls chilling in your room still with their eyes fixed on Felix.

You come back after cleaning yourself up to clean him too, so you can dress him in the clothes you bought him.

It's a bit of a struggle but you get a feeling that Felix really wants to cooperate.

"There, now you look like a real angel." you smile as you lean back, satisfied with the white loose pants and the white shirt, embroidered with golden flowers.

"I have some work to do on you yet." you sit him up and then grab some of your makeup.

You gently work on his face, putting some light gold eyeshadow on his eyelids, a few sparkles under his eyes and he seems to be pouting.

"You think I forgot to give you a sweet kiss, don't you?" you smirk. "I didn't, don't worry."

You finish up on his eye makeup then grab a pink lipstick, opening it up and applying it on your lips first.

"A finishing touch." you lean in, holding his face before you press your lips into his heart shaped ones, kissing him gently.

You giggle as you lean away, removing the smeared lipstick and repairing what stayed on his lips with your finger as he practically stares at you.

His eyes seem shiny and warm, something deep and dark inside them too and you can't look away.

"My sweet Lixie. So good for me." you kiss his nose and then his cheeks, making sure to kiss his pretty freckles.

You almost get completely lost in him, forgetting about the dolls watching you until one of them falls down onto the floor with a loud thud, making you jerk away from Felix.

"Jonathan! You startled me!" you reprimand the wooden doll before standing up and coming to it.

You take him in your arms and look at him.

"Are you jealous?" you ask as you gently put him back in his place, fixing his shirt and hat.

"Don't worry, I love you all equally." you pat the doll's head before turning to look at Felix.

You have a feeling that might change soon.

-

You take Felix to your workshop, a small room where you dedicate your time to repair dolls, sew their torn clothes or make them new outfits, sometimes even making a few dolls of your own.

"Welcome to my workshop, Lixie. I spend lots of time here so I guess you will too. Now, I should've started with this, but you... distracted me." your eyes fall down to his crotch before you look up at him.

"I will make sure you have everything you need and I will always treat you well, but of course I expect that to be reciprocated. Which means you are to behave well in this house, listen to what I say and be good to your brothers and sisters. If you ever do something to break the rules, there will be repercussions. And trust me, you don't want to get on my bad side." you wave your finger at the doll and it seems like he's listening intently, his eyes seemingly fearful as you sit across from him, making eye contact.

"Don't be scared, Lixie. I have a feeling that you're a good boy and that you'll be obedient. We will have no problems, you and I. I'll even reward your good behavior." you smirk at him, caressing his soft cheeks.

You lean in to press a kiss on his lips before you turn to your table and start working on your broken dolls.

Felix stares at you from where you left him, his hands tucked in his lap and eyes fixed on your hunched frame.

You almost forget about his presence as you concentrate on your work, every detail you sew into their clothes, the love you pour into them, in a way giving them a soul of their own.

Your hands seemed to dance as you kept working, until you felt a sharp pain in your neck.

"Ow!" you mutter and sit up, realizing you've been hunched over for too long, your shoulders tense, pain throbbing in your neck. "Time for a break." you announce, your stomach growling after that.

"And food, I guess." you turn to Felix, finally acknowledging his existence.

He looks to you like he wants to say something, even though he is sitting still.

"What is it, Lixie?" you lean in closer, looking right into his eyes.

He stays silent.

"Ah, you're shy. You'll come around. I'll wait for you to show yourself to me." you smirk, kissing his nose, your fingertips tracing the pretty freckles on his face.

After giving him a little kiss, you take him to your garden, which was thankfully surrounded by a tall wooden fence, hiding you away from the rest of the world.

"Sit here and I'll be right back." you sit him down on one of the fancy chairs, brushing away the hair that fell into his face.

You bring a few of your other dolls, sitting them down on the other chairs, bringing all of them a set of china; plates, cups and everything.

It's all themed with pink flowers, making everything look even more proper and fancy.

"Socialize." you wave your hand before disappearing into the kitchen, preparing a quick lunch for yourself.

You walk out into the garden some 15 minutes later with a plate of food for yourself and a glass of juice.

"I hope you're being nice to Felix." you say as you sit down, eyeing the four dolls sitting around the table, Felix being exactly across from you.

He looks a tad timid, and you're 100% sure that the expressions on his face keep changing, you know you're not just imagining it because other dolls you own have changed expressions or positions, some even giggled and whispered.

With your doll experience, Felix doesn't scare you, quite the opposite, you're waiting for him to start talking.

You make small talk with your dolls, about this beautiful day, how sunny and warm it is, how good lunch turned out.

As you continued talking, suddenly one of the cups started shaking and you look at the porcelain doll sitting next to Felix.

"Jenevieve. Don't do that! Behave." you warn but it's too late, the cup flies right into Felix's side, hitting him hard before crashing onto the floor, pieces of it flying everywhere.

Anger bubbles up in your veins as you take a deep breath in.

"You little bitch." you almost growl at the porcelain doll before standing up abruptly and grabbing a fistful of her hair.

"That's it, you're getting punished!" you seethe, walking back into the house as you carry her by her hair all the way down to the basement.

"You're gonna think long and hard about your behavior. And after you do, you will apologize to Felix. Like it or not he is family now." you say before laying the doll in a box and locking it.

"I know you're claustrophobic. So this will be a nice lesson for you never to misbehave again." you smirk before making your way back upstairs.

You quickly run to Felix, gasping when you notice a single tear running down his cheek.

"I'm sorry, angel." you wipe it away quickly, kissing his cheek after.

"Let's see the damage." you undo his shirt and sure enough there is a bruise forming on his side.

"For this, Jenevieve will get a week in the dungeon." you say angrily, your fingertips brushing against the bruise. "I'll take care of you, sweet Lixie. I promise that'll never happen again."

-

The same evening, you brought Felix to your bed, stripping him out of the shirt so you could take care of his bruise.

You flip through the manual seeing the warning about not bruising the doll and anxiety washes over you, hoping he wasn't now damaged in some irreparable way.

You rummage through your bathroom cabinet, finding a cream that was used for bruises, skipping back to Felix.

"Well, you're warm, you can blush, bruise and cry. And... cum." you giggle quietly. "So I guess this would help you?" you purse your lips before taking some cream out and gently applying it on his bruise.

"There-" you pause, seeing a bulge growing in his pants. "Really? You're so sensitive." you tsked, your hands on his thighs, gripping the flesh shortly.

You look at Felix's face and melt.

He's blushing again, his cheeks rosy followed by the tips of his ears becoming red.

"You're such a cutie." you coo at him. "But you're gonna have to wait a bit. I have to take off your make up and brush your hair. I want you to be all comfy in bed." you nod to yourself, getting up to retrieve makeup wipes and a brush.

You start gently removing his makeup, leaving little kisses on his cheeks and nose, pressing your lips into his plush ones.

After cleaning him up, you take the brush and sit him up more comfortably so you can start brushing his hair.

"Oh you really like this." your eyes widen as you notice him twitching in his pants. "Like your hair played with, my pretty angel?" you twirl a strand of his soft hair between your fingers.

"Give me three minutes." you hurry to your bathroom to get ready for bed before skipping back to Felix excitedly.

"I'm here sweetie." you grab his face and crash your lips against his.

The way he was made, his lips seemed to be kissing back, so soft and sweet against yours.

You kissed him for some time, already addicted to his taste before you started leaving kisses on his jaw, all the way to his ear.

He only seemed to become even more red, the color seeping onto his neck and chest.

"My shy Lixie." you giggle, leaving kisses on the column of his neck.

He feels so soft and smells so sweet, making you want to do this forever, just kiss him everywhere as he lays and takes it.

You liked being in control, it made you feel powerful as your hands roamed all over his body, his skin so soft like a baby's, you couldn't stop touching him.

Your lips covered every inch of Felix as you kissed his chest, his arms, his stomach, his hands.

Taking your sweet time to worship him.

You slid his pants off, getting up to put them on the chair where you've already left the shirt.

Felix was blushing profusely and he was very warm as you touched him, his cock throbbing, the tip red and angry, glistening with his wetness.

"You're working yourself up, dolly. You need to calm down a little or I won't give you what you want." you smirk, sliding your hands on his supple thighs, up to his balls where you lightly grazed them with your fingertips.

His cock twitched in protest, his face even redder now.

"If you act naughty, I'll leave you like this all night. Don't test me, my little prince."

Felix's lips seemed pouty at that and you waited a little, only gently caressing his smooth arms, the redness of his face and body subsiding slowly until only his cheeks were rosy like before.

"Good boy." his cock leaked and twitched at the praise.

"Ah, my dolly likes to be praised?" you giggled delightfully, smoothing out his hair.

"I'll keep that in my mind." you winked at him, fingertips grazing against his length before you finally wrapped your hand around him.

"Good boys get rewards." you coo at him, thumbing at his wet slit.

Felix's ears become red again.

"I'll take care of you, sweetie. Don't worry." you whisper as you lean down, leaving kisses all over his skin as you start moving your hand.

You play with him for as long as you want to, torturing his cock as you alternate between fast and slow movements, at times using only one hand and then both or fondling his balls, your lips never leaving his heated skin.

You explore him with your tongue, swirling it around his nipples and noticing how he got even more wet because of it.

"So sensitive. Cute." you kiss his lips, your hand tangling in his hair.

"You wanna cum, dolly? Ah, I wish I could hear you beg, I bet you'd sound so sweet all desperate for me." you coo at Felix, gripping his hair and pulling it back as you jerk him off faster.

He explodes all over your hand and himself, making you gasp from the amount that spurted out, curiosity taking you over as you scoop some of it on your finger, licking it up.

"Mm. Are you strawberry flavored?" you chuckle, swirling your finger in his cum to lick at it again.

"Maybe cotton candy?" you giggle again before kissing him sweetly.

You clean Felix up and cozy up to him, curling your body around his as you wrap your arms around him.

You hope that from that day on, everything goes smoothly; without any more incidents.

The following week passed by just as you expected, with no incidents, the dolls now on their best behavior after they've witnessed Jenevieve being dragged down to the basement.

Felix became an obsession of sorts, you just couldn't keep your hands off of him.

You've never owned a doll like him, and to say that you're infatuated is an understatement.

Constantly kissing him and touching him made you equally as aroused as it did him.

You wanted him in every way, but you didn't want to use all his capabilities on your own, instead you wished he'd snap out of it and do it by himself, participate and react to your touches more than just heating up, blushing or twitching.

You felt sad every day you had to leave for work, leaving Felix alone with the other dolls.

You warned them not to try anything or you'd burn them to a crisp.

But as you finally let Jenevieve out, hoping she had learned her lesson, you had no idea how it would actually make all hell break loose.

"Now, Jenevieve I hope you're sorry for what you've done and that you understand why it was wrong. This can never happen again, okay?" you told her before putting her back in her place.

You sat Felix on your bed, caressing him and kissing him for some time.

"Be a good boy, Lixie." you kiss his forehead.

"And all of you too. Behave or else." you give Felix one last kiss before leaving the house.

It was obvious that some of your dolls felt neglected.

This was their home and in their eyes Felix was an intruder they had to get rid of.

He was taking up all your time, soaking up all your attention, getting all your love.

There were dolls that didn't agree, they liked Felix and thought he was sweet just like you did.

Some were just scared to share their opinion, afraid of being locked in the basement, smashed to pieces or burned into ashes.

The neglected dolls had come up with a plan.

They were going to destroy Felix so by the time you come home, there is nothing left to salvage.

-

"I'm home!" you announced cheerfully as you entered your house, a bag of groceries secured in your arm.

Whistling, you made your way to the living room but stopped dead in your tracks when you saw a few drops of red liquid on the floor, something that looked like blood.

You stood in shock for a moment before dropping the bag of groceries on the floor, as they made a loud thud sound, the apples you bought rolling around your living room.

With a gasp, you started running up the stairs, all of them painted in little red dots, anxiety building up with each step you took.

When you reached your bedroom, a shriek escaped your lips, echoing off of the walls.

Felix was thrown on the floor, his body and face bruised and cut up, the outfit you dressed him in torn into pieces.

What was most concerning was the blood dripping out of his wounds.

Your heart started beating fast in fear.

Noticing Jenevieve standing in the corner together with some of your other dolls made your blood boil, your body starting to shake with rage as your eyes blurred with tears.

With a loud growl as rage took you over completely, you ran downstairs to grab your sledgehammer.

"I told you. I told you to behave!" you screamed at the culprits, lifting up your weapon and smashing the first doll that was nearest to you.

"How could you do this?" you cried, continuing to pound your sledgehammer on the dolls, damaging your wall and furniture in the process.

Jenevieve was last and you smirked at her.

"Goodbye, bitch." you said before smashing her into pieces, the sound of porcelain breaking was so satisfying in your ears.

"Do any of you have anything to add?" you looked at the other dolls coldly, the ones that didn't dare move from their designated place.

"Didn't think so." you added, fresh tears sliding down your cheeks as your eyes caught sight of Felix again.

"Shit!" you exclaimed, falling down to your knees and grabbing his face gently.

He was crying.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry I left you alone with them Lixie! I will make this right, I promise!" you cried as you held onto him.

You ran to your bathroom to grab a first aid kit, running back to Felix as fast as you could.

You tended to his wounds, tears falling down your face onto his cheeks and mixing with his own.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." you kept whispering as you took care of him, worry growing inside you when Felix became colder to the touch.

"I think this one needs stitches." you noticed a gash on his hand. "How did they do this? I'll never let anyone hurt you again, Felix."

That night, you brought Felix to your workshop, sewing up his wound and hoping that he would heal just like the bruise from his first day here was healing.

You didn't want to look at your dolls, opting to take Felix to the guest room, the only empty room in the house, getting him all comfy in your fluffiest blankets before you joined him under the covers.

"I love you a lot Lixie. Even though it's only been a week. You're my favorite doll ever." you kissed his cheek before cuddling him, holding him close to your body as you felt him warm up.

A smile spread on your face.

He's going to be okay.

Over the next few weeks, Felix's wounds have healed nicely.

You've asked to work from home so you could be with him all day.

It was quiet in your house, all of the other dolls were now even more afraid of you, after your little sledgehammer revenge.

You cuddled Felix a lot, holding him close whenever you could, playing with his soft hair and doting on him the entire time.

His face seemed to change throughout that time, from an expression of sadness and pain back to happiness and his rosy cheeks.

Once he was fully healed, you decided to bake a chocolate cake to celebrate his recovery.

Of course, he was in the kitchen with you, watching you work on the sweet treat.

You had more than one sweet treat in mind, you thought, giggling to yourself as you swiped some chocolate cream on your finger.

"Mm. So tasty." you smirked, looking directly at Felix.

"You wanna taste?" you took some more, coming closer to him and pressing your finger on his lips.

"Come on, I know you want it." you smirked. "I'll let you taste something even sweeter later."

He didn't react in the way you wanted him to, but his face was quickly becoming red.

Sighing, you leaned back and continued making the cake.

Once it was finished, you decided to let it cool down and take Felix to your living room.

"Look at that. I didn't even touch you." you giggled, the bulge in his pants evident.

He was finally all well and healed so you let yourself explore his body with your hands and lips.

It didn't take long for you to strip him, your eyes glued to his pretty cock, all hard for you.

"You make me wanna do things I usually don't." you sighed, gently stroking him.

"But you've been so good for me, so I gotta reward you." you laid Felix down, kneeling between his legs.

You kissed his thighs, lightly biting into his skin and noticing how he twitched at that.

You wanted to taste him and have him in your mouth which is something you were usually uncomfortable with but Felix made you want to do all those things you thought you never would.

"My good boy." you praise him, your lips pressing gentle kisses into his leaking cock.

Felix's body flushed as you kept kissing and licking at him, your hands sliding slowly on his soft skin, mapping him out.

You kissed his tip, tasting his pre-cum, sweet like cotton candy and you couldn't wait anymore as you wrapped your lips around him.

Your tongue tingled from the sweet taste as you swirled it around his head, a moan escaping your lips and making him leak even more.

Felix's fingers twitched on his side and your eyes widened a little as you took more of him in.

Hoping he would move again, you started bobbing your head faster, taking him in deeper, moaning around him and creating vibrations around his throbbing cock.

His fingers twitched a few more times, every time his tip hit the back of your throat it seemed to make him move.

Determined to snap him out of whatever trance he was in you gave it your all, drooling around his length as you sucked him harder, your hand squeezing his sensitive balls.

Taking you by surprise, Felix came, filling your mouth up with his cum and making you sputter as you didn't expect it.

You managed to swallow some, the rest making a mess out of his crotch.

You knew he was supposed to cum only after you pull on his hair so how did this happen?

Now, you had an even bigger inkling that Felix was alive.

A smirk spread on your lips as you stared at his reddened face.

"D'you want a taste, angel?" you giggled, your hand between your legs.

"Yeah, you do." you added, gathering some of your juices before bringing them up to his lips.

You pushed your finger in his mouth, making him taste you.

"I know you like that, my pretty prince."

You gave him a few kisses before cleaning him up.

"We can eat some cake tomorrow." you told him as you laid him down in your bed, the guest room now becoming your room.

As you cuddled up to Felix that night, you had no idea that he would finally wake up while you slept.

-

Felix's eyes widened as he fought for breath, his heart beating hard against his chest.

He gripped at the sheets, fisting them in pain as his whole body hurt.

You were sleeping peacefully on your side, facing him and for some reason he was terrified.

Felix saw what you did when you got angry so he didn't want to upset you in any way even though you treated him well, so well that he knew he loved you as much as you loved him.

But with confusion and fear running through his veins, he decided not to wake you up, instead he got up quietly in search of food and water.

He knew that if he took something from the fridge, you'd know he was awake so Felix made his way to your pantry, his feet padding on the floor quietly.

On his way there, his knee collided into a chair and he cursed quietly, his eyes widening as he looked back to the direction of your room.

Felix gulped, listening for some time and after deciding it was safe he entered the pantry.

He found some cookies and in his hunger he devoured most of them, accidentally leaving the wrapper and the crumbs behind.

After drinking some water, Felix returned to bed, deciding to let you sleep and maybe tell you that he's alive tomorrow.

-

Waking up the next day, you started the morning like any other, kissing Felix's sweet face.

But, something was different this morning.

His eyes were closed.

"Hm." you looked at him and he seemed to be breathing but it was so early in the morning that you thought you had dreamed it up.

Suddenly, your phone rang, scaring you out of your thoughts.

"Hi, Jackie!" it was your childhood best friend, the only person who tolerated your obsession with dolls.

She didn't mind it much and she loved you for who you were, the two of you grew up together, going through all the ups and downs with each other.

"Hey, y/n! I'm in town this weekend so I thought we could catch up." she said cheerfully.

"Of course, I'd love to!" you sat up, momentarily forgetting about Felix as you made your way to the kitchen with a smile on your face.

"Great, I can't wait to share all the tea I have." she said and you giggled before noticing something weird.

There was a glass you didn't touch on the counter, and your pantry door was open so you walked towards it as Jackie yapped in your ear.

As you turned the light on, you noticed half eaten cookies on the floor, the wrapper pulled apart seemingly with teeth.

"What? Do I have rats in my house?" you chuckled.

"I'm not a rat." a deep voice said behind you and you shrieked, turning around, your phone almost slipping out of your hand.

"Y/n? What's wrong?" Jackie asked.

"I'm gonna have to call you back." you said as you hung up, staring at Felix as he stood before you with his eyes wide, a timid look on his face, his cheeks rosy and lips pouty.

His hands were clasped together as he played with his fingers.

"F-Felix?" your eyes welled up with happy tears.

"It's me." he said, the depth of his voice shocking you once again, you didn't expect your sweet angel would have such deep vocal chords.

"Oh!" you laughed in delight, throwing your arms around him and hugging him tightly.

Felix gasped at your onslaught of love as you squeezed him so tight that you knocked his breath out of his lungs.

"I knew you'd come to me eventually, my angel." you gently took his face in your hands, your thumbs moving back and forth on his cheeks slowly.

"Y-you're not mad at me?" he asks cutely, blinking at you.

"No, no, not at all! Though, you left a mess." you shake your head and his face becomes redder.

"I'm sorry, I will clean it up." he says timidly and you giggle.

"Oh, you are so adorable!" cuteness aggression takes you over completely as you pinch his cheeks and kiss his plump lips repeatedly, making him giggle.

His stomach growled and he looked at you embarassingly, his face red and you chuckled.

"You need a proper meal." you said, deciding to make the classic eggs and bacon combo.

You took his hands and led him to the chair, sitting him down.

"Let me help you." Felix beamed at you.

"It's okay, Lixie. I like taking care of you."

"I know, but I want to do the same for you."

You melted instantly, kissing him again, it was hard to be apart from him.

The two of you made breakfast together, albeit clumsily as he was still confused about everything.

After eating, the two of you sat in the garden, you with your cup of coffee and Felix with his cup of hot cocoa, two slices of the chocolate cake you made last night served on the fine china.

"What made you wake up?" you asked.

"I- I'm not sure. I tried doing it before, I only managed to move my fingers or toes slightly, sometimes my eyes. It was honestly like I was imprisoned in my own body. I wanted to- to reciprocate, hold you properly and take care of you like you do to me." he said, looking away as he blushed once more.

"Ah, you are so sweet my prince. Just how I imagined. I knew you were alive, I was just hoping and waiting for you to break out of the hypnotized state."

"You think I was hypnotized?" Felix tilts his head at you.

"Do you remember anything before coming here?" you ask, reaching out to touch his hand gently.

"I remember this big cold room. And water. So much water. And there were others but I can't remember their faces. We were all there in the big room. There was a voice talking to us, I- I don't know what it said. But I think it was giving out commands." the more Felix talked about his past, the more worked up he was getting, his hands shaking, a thin sheen of sweat covering his forehead.

"Hey, hey it's okay. You don't have to tell me everything right away. It must be upsetting." you quickly stand up, holding his face and caressing him.

"I don't wanna go back there."

"You won't." you smile, sitting in his lap.

Felix freezes, his eyes wide and lips falling open, his face taking on the familiar rosy color.

"Y/n." he looks up at you cutely and you lean in, kissing him lovingly.

"You're no longer just my dolly. You're my boyfriend now." you giggle and he smiles the most beautiful bright smile you have ever seen.

"Oh! I am?"

"Mhm." you nod and lean in to kiss him again, your tongue licking at his bottom lip and he opens his mouth, letting you explore him properly now that he's awake, your hand tangled in his soft hair.

"I love you, Lixie." you kiss the tip of his nose.

"I love you y/n. Thank you for everything. For being so good to me and helping me heal when those dolls..." he shivers.

"Of course. Sorry if I went a little crazy. I know I can be insane sometimes. It's just when I saw you like that on the floor, I felt my heart break. I needed to smash them into pieces so they can never hurt you again."

"No, I'm glad you did that. If I could, I'd fight back."

"I know you would." you smile, shifting on his lap as you caress his face.

Scooting closer to him, you feel him press into you.

"I'm sorry." Felix whimpers, looking everywhere but at you. "I know you don't want to... you know."

"I do. Now that you're awake." you nod and his eyes widen.

"Oh?"

"Let's go inside." you giggle at his shocked expression.

"W-what do I do?" Felix looks at you unsurely as you sit on your bed. "Usually you're in charge..."

"You can take the lead, angel. Whatever you had in mind all this time, you can do now." you smile at him, taking his hands in yours to reassure him.

"I wanna worship you like you do to me." he blushes profusely and you chuckle.

"Of course." you say, the two of you starting with loving kisses, layers of clothing slowly coming off.

Felix lays you down gently, looking panicked for a moment, like he doesn't know what to start with, and as his eyes travel all over your body, the redness on his face spreads to his ears and neck.

Ultimately, he decides to do what you did, leaning down to kiss your neck first.

You throw your head back, giving him space as his plump lips gently travel on your skin.

You close your eyes as Felix's worships you, his lips so sweet on your hot skin, his hands caressing you gently as he slides them on your arms, then to your waist and tummy before slowly going up to cup your breasts.

"L-Lixie." you whimper as he plays with your nipples before leaning in to kiss them, his tongue darting out to swirl around the sensitive bud before his pretty lips wrap around it, sucking gently.

"Ah!" you moan, arching into him, arousal dripping from your core.

Felix whimpers when his finger touches your warmness, feeling how wet you got just for him.

He finds your clit, gently rubbing it in circles with his fingertips as he continues sucking on your breasts.

"Want you." you whine and he lifts up.

"C-can I taste you?" he asks, licking his lips and you nod eagerly.

Felix leaves kisses on your tummy all the way down to your core where he presses his lips against your clit.

"Mm, angel." you moan, making him moan too.

His tongue darts out as he starts licking at you and your eyes roll back.

He groans into your core, already addicted to your taste as he spreads you with his thumbs, pushing his tongue in eagerly, as deep as he can.

Your legs tremble a little, your hand ending up in his hair as you hold him down.

Felix keeps grunting into you, his deep voice sending vibrations through you as he laps you up, his button nose pressing perfectly against your clit.

Being sensitive, you can't hold it in too long as you explode, your juices spilling on his lips and chin.

"You taste so sweet." he looks up at you, licking at his lips.

"Come here, I need you." you make grabby hands at him and Felix giggles as he slides up, slotting himself perfectly between your thighs.

"Are you sure?" he asks and you nod.

"Please."

"Anything you want, darling." Felix whispers.

You feel his tip caress your folds and you whine, wrapping your legs around him as he sinks in, slowly opening you up just for him.

You embrace each other, your bodies moving together as Felix makes love to you until you're crying and trembling in his hold, your nails digging into his back as he finally releases his warm cum inside you, filling you up to the brim.

That night, Felix got to embrace you just how he always wanted.

The next few days pass by in perfect bliss.

You and Felix are attached at the hip, always together, always in each other's arms, lips constantly touching.

You took him out on so many dates and he loved being outside, seeing other people enjoying their day too, feeling the warm sunlight on his face, the gentle breeze caressing his hair.

You'd never been this happy before, never having someone who had seen you at your worst and still loved you for who you are.

Felix also loved helping you around the house, giving you massages and doing everything he can to make you feel comfortable.

He even told you of the dolls who were always nice to him so you'd take them out in the garden to hang out with you and Felix on a nice picnic date.

Even your friend Jackie was happy for you, first asking you to explain how the hell did he go from a doll to a human.

"So, basically, you were alive the whole time?" she scratched her head, as the three of you sat in your garden.

"I guess I was."

"So, do you remember how you were made? Like, are you human or?" Jackie asks, her eyes widened in wonder.

"I honestly have no idea. As I told y/n, I only remember that there was a room and that I was suspended in water."

"It's all so peculiar." you shake your head. "But it doesn't matter. What matters now is that Felix is alive and he is safe here." you kiss his cheek and he blushes instantly.

"If you're happy y/n, I'm happy too." Jackie smiles at you.

"Thanks, J." you giggle.

The rest of the afternoon Jackie fills you in with all the drama that happened in her life since you last saw each other, both you and Felix entertained after getting a scoop.

That night, Felix falls asleep quickly and you stay up just for some time, caressing his face and admiring his beauty.

"Good night, my sweet Lixie." you kiss his forehead before nuzzling into him and falling asleep.

Felix's night is filled with nightmares, after opening the topic of his past with Jackie today, memories started flooding in his mind.

People in white suits, their faces unrecognizable. A huge ceiling with big silver pipes. Water tanks with bodies floating inside them all in fetal position. Connected to a machine with a steady beeping sound echoing off of the walls.

The feeling of dread creeping up his spine.

Felix woke up with a loud gasp, covered in sweat, his heart almost leaping out of his chest.

"Lixie? What's wrong?" you sit up quickly as he jostled you awake.

"I- I had a nightmare." his lips tremble, tears sliding down his cheeks.

"It's okay, it was just a dream." you embrace him as he nuzzles into your neck.

You caress him until he calms down.

"It was about that place, wasn't it?"

He nods at your question and you sigh.

"How about we eat some ice cream?" you try to cheer him up and Felix nods quickly, a small smile already appearing on his face.

The two of you are in the kitchen when a loud banging on the door scares you both.

Both of you exchange a fearful look.

The banging starts again.

"Don't." Felix shakes his head, his hands trembling.

"It's okay." you reassure him, making your way to the door.

When you open them, you see five men in suits standing on your doorway, all their faces devoid of any emotion.

"Are you y/n l/n?" one of them speaks in a monotone voice.

"Yes, I am."

"So you've purchased Felix, the comforting doll?"

"I did. What is this about?" you ask confusedly.

"We are here to take him. There's been a malfunction and we need the dolls back at our company."

You scoff at them.

"No." you cross your arms.

"Miss, it's in your best interest to cooperate with us."

"Who the fuck do you think you are to know what's in my best interest?" you frown as two of the men exchange unimpressed looks.

You groan and in an attempt to shoo them away, you lift your leg up and kick one of the men right in his shin.

He doesn't even budge, doesn't make an expression or a sound that would indicate he was even hit.

"Get her out of the way." the man in the very back says and two of them grab your arms as you start screaming and kicking.

Three of the other men walk inside just as Felix runs up to the corridor, hearing your screams.

"Y/n!" he yells out, as the men grab him.

"Felix!" you kick around, tears sliding down your cheeks as you try to tear away from the men but to no avail.

"Let him go! He's alive! I love him!"

"Please don't take me away from her!"

Both of you scream but nobody listens to you.

One of the men takes a big needle out of his suitcase and before you can react he pushes it into Felix's neck, injecting him with some kind of liquid.

You scream as his body goes limp and they lift him up, walking out of your house.

"You'll get your money back, don't worry." the last man says and you scream at him, your tears flowing like a wild river.

"I don't want it! I want my Felix!" you cry, running after them but they've already pushed him into the backseat.

One of the men holds you back as they all pile in the car, leaving quickly as you fall down to your knees and cry.

Your heart hurts for breaking your promise of keeping Felix safe.

Your mind races with a thousand thoughts.

What are you going to do now?

Taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @porangporangmeong @laylasbunbunny @laughatdanger @jeonginslefthand @sapphirewaves @simpforleeknaur @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @painterhyunjin @starlost-mochi-x @saintcosette @juskz @quokkacidal @chuuyaobsessed @whatdoyouwanttocallmefor @lixies-favorite-cookie @thelostprincessofasgard @linocvp1d

[lale-txt]

❥ 𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐇𝐎𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐂𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄 ↳ 𝐰/ 𝐀𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮, 𝐎𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮, 𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨, 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐦𝐚, 𝐎𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚, 𝐈𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐳𝐮𝐦𝐢 & 𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐬𝐚

a/n: reader is gn! i started drafting those during one of the first sticky hot summer nights of the year, then forgot about it until this came over me once again like a fever, and now here we are. i love writing drabbles because they force you to really think about the chars, how you perceive them and how to nail their unique personalities in 200 words or less. anyway, this is my first time writing for HQ after the brainworms got me down bad and i had lots of fun! hope you'll enjoy them too ♡

word count: 1.3k

𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐔 whines when you have the audacity to kick him back towards his end of the couch, catching your ankle and pulling you towards him in return, stubbornly ignoring your protests. Too hot to cuddle, my ass, he pouts, genuinely offended that you’d even consider that; when the only time Atsumu ever feels a sense of calm is when part of you touches him. Your hand playing with the shaved hair in the back of his neck, your leg hooked over his hipbone as you sprawl out in bed together, hell, even your icy cold feet shoved underneath his butt during winter. Something was missing when he couldn’t have your proximity. Yer so needy, Tsumu. So what if he was? He pulls you into his lap, face nuzzled into the crook of your neck, hands tightening around your waist. His breath fanning over your skin, hot and cool against it. Atsumu takes, he demands, but with you he is pleading, silent for once. Just a little longer–dreaming, breathing you in, kissing till he feels you smiling against his lips.

𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔 wears his hair shorter now, back at its natural dark color, too. You helped him buzz it off during one of those sticky summer nights. Both of you in nothing but your underwear, Osamu sitting on the edge of the bathtub in your cramped bathroom. One hand of yours holding a razor and the other clamped over your mouth because you horribly messed up a setting and now he had a funny little edge in his hair, throwing you both in a laughing fit. It was your first summer together and Osamu couldn’t help but hope that there would be many more like this to come, with your bodies orbiting each other, unable to keep your hands off despite the heat and the sweat, the air heavy and electric and yet so light whenever he hears you laugh. Nothing beats the feeling of lifting you up on the kitchen counter and your eyes lingering on his hands, shaping a midnight snack for the both of you, getting drunk on stolen glances and kisses. There’s many metaphors for food and love and right now, Osamu can taste them all on the tip of your tongue.

𝐊𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐎 hasn’t even kicked his shoes off at the entrance yet and is already loosening his tie, before slender fingers work down button for button on his shirt. He hears you laugh about his demeanor from the other end of the hallway. How lucky, he thinks to himself. To have someone waiting for him at home, making even long work days during the most miserable summer heat bearable. His shirt has barely hit the floor and he’s already on you, caging you in with his arms and covering every inch of your skin he can reach in kisses, despite your giggling and feigned huffing over how sticky he is, sending him to shower first (as if you wouldn’t come right after him). Kuroo purrs when your hands tangle in his hair. In the end you always pull him back towards your lips again, swallowing every little quip and taunt like candy, sweet and syrupy in your mouth. It reminds him how he fell in love with you many summers ago, his heart ablaze ever since.

𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀 is glued to the fan at this point. He even switched gaming from his desktop set-up to a handheld console, reluctantly admitting that his old house would heat up even more with his computer running at full blast. His expression really says it all when you approach him, silently pleading for cuddles. Kenma just can’t understand how anyone would seek someone else’s body heat when the sun outside was already doing a pretty good job in trying to end him. Still, he isn’t immune to your charms, never was (one time he mumbled something about your stats being way too high and how everything changed once he received a love buff of yours). When you hold out a popsicle as a means of bribery and blink at him with those damn soft eyes of yours, Kenma pauses his game and holds out his arms. He hums into the kiss you give him before sitting down in his lap, your lips tasting like ice cream and summer love. He rests his chin on your shoulder, face nuzzled against your neck, before he continues his game, letting you feed him the sweet cold treat. Summer might have become a little more bearable with you in his life–though he was already looking forward to many winters under the kotatsu with you. 

𝐎𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀 is squishing your cheeks together, his thumb brushing over the corner of your mouth. Collecting evidence, but also wanting to feel your tongue poke out slightly against it, cheeky as ever. Just how could you eat the last ice cream in the freezer without him? He lets out an exaggerated huff, feigned indignation, both of you knowing he can never keep this up for too long–not when it comes to you. Oikawa leans down to kiss you, your face still in a tight grip, tasting the remains of the ice cream on your lips, as if you weren’t sweet enough already. Maybe he can be bribed for another kiss when you offer a midnight walk to the 7/11 down the street, promising to pay for a cool sweet treat to make it up to him. He had already forgotten what he was mad about the moment you leaned into the kiss, but he’ll never say no to a chance to hold your hand, even if it’s sticky with leftover ice cream and the summer heat. To Oikawa, love is stored in the mundane things, even if his love for you is anything but that.

𝐈𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐌𝐈 is standing in the kitchen past midnight, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers while he roams the freezer for anything to help him cool down; even a pack of frozen peas would do. He feels a pang of guilt for having peeled away from you, your form pressed so tightly against him in his sleep, it almost gave him a heat stroke–for more reason than one. Everything is sticky and airless and Iwaizumi is sure that if he would have glanced at you even a minute longer, his heart might have just given out on him. All this love he holds for you, burning him up from the inside, like a fever. He lets out a long exhale when he presses an ice bag against the back of his neck, but it’s not that what causes a shiver down his spine; it’s two arms sneaking around his waist from behind, your sleepy voice mumbling out his name, your body melting into his again. The first kiss pressed on the side of your neck is an apology, the second one a promise. The third–to devour you.

𝐒𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐒𝐀 grumbles something about you being too sticky and sweaty, making a weak attempt to shove you back to your side of the bed, only to pull you back by your hips when you actually do leave some room between you. He can’t help it, you fit so perfectly in the curve of his body, your back pressed against his chest, one of his knees nudged between your legs, all tangled up. It’s the perfect position to plant kisses on the back of your neck, too. Kiyoomi loathes those hot summer nights in the concrete city. He’d rather be somewhere else with you, somewhere to breathe more easily through this heat. Maybe you should move to the countryside, yes. A small house with lots of green surrounding it. Less people and noise, just you and him. Yeah, he would like that. He kisses the back of your neck once more and takes a slow, deep inhale of your sweet scent, before sleep finally crawls upon him again. For now he’ll endure this heat, anything, as long as he can hold you in his arms like this–and have a cold shower with you in the morning, maybe.

[luckyladylily]

So like, transandrophobia.

To start this out, I am a trans woman, been around in the queer community for a while. I'm also bisexuality, polyamorous, disabled, and aromantic, and I think these other parts of my identity and the crap I've caught over the years for them heavily informs how I analyze something like transandrophobia. My wife is also asexual, so that plays a part in it too.

So every group of marginalized people has their own unique experiences and problems. It's more of a rule than something we've mathematically demonstrated, but as far as these things go it's ridiculously well established, and personally every time I've done even a basic dive into the issues faced by a marginalized group it's been self evident. I could easily list a dozen groups ranging from racial minorities to different kinds of disabled people to different queer identities and analyze their social issues but let's be real, this is pretty well established theory, anyone who needs me to do that is not really interacting with good faith. This is one of the big reasons we talk to people about their own experiences and groups, we cannot reasonably extrapolate the experiences of others from our own.

So like trans men and trans mascs and anyone else that falls under that umbrella has their unique experiences. The idea that we would even question this is weird to me? Like I can't even imagine the kind of evidence someone would need to present to me to change my mind, and given the pattern of the queer community to be shitty in exactly this way to people in our community, yeah that is not happening.

Therefore, we are taking it for granted that the trans men/masc/related umbrella has their own things going on like everyone else ever, and I don't understand how someone acting in good faith can try to claim otherwise unless they are young or otherwise very inexperienced with such things.

The next point of contention seems to be the name, and I gotta be real I don't care and I don't understand why other people do. I've read all sorts of arguments against the word transandrophobia and the majority of them seem to be rooted in a misunderstanding of intersectionality, and even then it's like there is such a thing where people get so mired in theory that they miss the forest for the trees.

Perhaps more important to me, getting overly worked up about something as unimportant as the precise term is... weird. Like exclusionists hating on bi and ace people weird. I remember what it was like a decade ago when exclusionists were trying to police the words of bi women, and five years ago when ace and aro people were under constant attack under the pretense that our language was harmful for some reason or other. You are going to have to work very, very, very hard to convince me that any bickering over language as it relates to transandrophobia is not just more of the same.

Next, "transandrobros hate trans femmes" and similar stuff. I've seen the callout posts and found them completely unconvincing. Again, they read a lot like the old "ace people hate lesbians!" posts I used to see. I'm not convinced that the individuals involved were a problem, I am certainly not able to extrapolate a problem to the rest of the group.

Finally, there is this idea that "maleness is not a vector for oppression" and this invalidates something about the whole transandrophobia thing, ranging from the entire concept of trans men experiencing prejudice to something about language being imprecise all the way to "This is fascist shit, omg these people are basically nazis" depending on who says it. I'm not going to touch any of that and just look at the underlying logic.

This is based off a misunderstanding of intersectionality theory. Many people think of intersectionality as defining intersecting prejudice, like a ven diagram, such that transmisogyny is the intersection of transphobia and misogyny. This is incorrect. Intersectionality defines unique prejudice experienced by people with intersecting identities. Instead of a transmisogyny as the overlap of transphobia and misogyny, imagine adding a third circle that overlaps both but also has its own areas covered by neither.

Applied to transandrophobia, even if we assume maleness is not a vector for oppression, there is no reason to assume that the intersection of maleness with a marginalized identity doesn't result in new issues. Imagine that 3 circle venn diagram that represents misogyny, transphobia, and transmisogyny. Even if you remove the misogyny circle there is still plenty of ground covered by the transmisogyny circle.

This just isn't a valid criticism. It is a pure theory approach based on a flawed reading of theory.

So in summary:

Everyone has their unique shit going on and I've seen no convincing evidence that trans men, mascs, etc. Are the exception.

I not seen any convincing argument that the word itself is bad.

I've not seen any convincing evidence that there is some epidemic of transandrophobia truthers hating and harassing trans femmes on scales higher than normal background queer infighting.

The most coherent objection to transandrophobia I've seen is categorically incorrect and based on a fundamental misunderstanding of intersectionality theory.

I would like to remind everyone at this point I am a trans woman, part of the group that is supposedly a problem for and I've just not see it at all, to the point where it is kind of weird how intensely some people are pushing this.

I'm not trying to be mean or whatever, I'm sure the distress on display here comes from a real place and real trauma, but I've yet to see anything that makes me think there is substance to the objections to transandrophobia as a concept. It feels and reads like the latest round of queer intracommunity exclusionism, and the fact that this time around I'm not one of the target identities doesn't change that for me.

[vaspider]

I've been thinking about the one post that had some weirdo TIRF on it talking about how "men 👏 don't 👏 experience 👏 misogyny" and everybody just kind of skipped to talking about how ofc trans men experience misogyny but like

We can't just skip how fucking asinine that sentence is on its face. That is not ground that should be conceded, bc trying to state as if it's a plain fact that "men don't experience misogyny" should get you laughed out of any room you're in.

Every time a boy is told he "throws like a girl" or is called a "little baby girl" for crying, he's experiencing misogyny because he's being devalued for traits that others see as feminine, traits which those doing the mocking see as belonging to women. Every time a fat dude's "moobs" get mocked, he's experiencing misogyny. Every time a girl makes fun of a dude for enjoying something she perceives as feminine, he's experiencing a double whammy of misogyny and homophobia.

There is no other reasonable way to discuss what these men are experiencing. That's misogyny.

The longer I talk with people in all kinds of marginalized groups online, the more convinced I am both that it's very understandable that people want their experiences and their hurts and their oppressions to be totally unique and unable to be experienced by anybody who isn't part of their group and also that anybody who hammers away on the idea that "only [X] can experience [Y]" and devotes excessive time to guarding the borders of their little fiefdom is not just not helping the cause of liberation, but is actively degrading our chances of making meaningful change.

I would go so far as to say there probably isn't a man alive who has zero experience of misogyny. Misogyny is leveraged against men constantly as a form of social control. Just because it's "do X or we will devalue you by calling you a woman" doesn't make it not an experience of misogyny.

Is it exactly the same thing that women experience? No, but also what different groups of women and different individuals experience is also different. There is no flawlessly singular experience of oppression experienced only by women, experienced the same way by all women, and never endured by men.

With that very simple fact in mind, spending time endlessly trying to police the way that another marginalized individual speaks about the method and effect of their own oppression rather than finding solidarity and commonality is fucking fed shit. It does not serve us and actively sabotages all of us, serving only those who actively benefit from our subservience and our infighting.

So fucking stop it.

[esotericalchemist]

𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲 - 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 ₊˚ˑ༄ؘ

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

Mercury in astrology governs how we think, communicate, and process information, shaping our mental faculties and how we interact with the world. Just as each sign brings its unique energy to Mercury, there’s an even deeper layer to explore—the decans. Each decan offers a more nuanced view of Mercury’s influence, subtly shifting how we think, speak, and connect based on the specific degrees of the sign it occupies. While Mercury guides our intellectual pursuits and expression, understanding its decans can provide insight into the unique flavor each person brings to communication and learning. As we dive into this deeper exploration, we begin to see how Mercury’s placement in each decan influences not only our minds but also the ways in which we share our ideas and connect with others. Through this understanding, we can unlock a more profound appreciation of our mental strengths, challenges, and the paths toward using our communication skills for growth and transformation.

Decan - How to find your Mercury Decan

To find your Mercury decan, you'll need to know the degree Mercury falls within your zodiac sign. Every sign covers 30 degrees, and each sign is divided into three decans, each spanning 10 degrees:

0°-10°: First Decan, ruled by the sign's primary planet.

10°-20°: Second Decan, influenced by the next sign in the same element.

20°-30°: Third Decan, influenced by the final sign in the same element.

For example, if your Mercury is in Leo at 5°, it falls in the First Decan, ruled by the Sun, giving you a bold, expressive communication style. If Mercury is in Gemini at 15°, it’s in the Second Decan, ruled by Venus, adding charm and diplomacy to your intellect.

𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mars

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Aries, your mind operates with speed and urgency, thanks to the influence of Mars. You think quickly, preferring to jump right into action rather than getting lost in details or overanalyzing. When faced with a challenge, you prefer to cut straight to the solution, making your communication style direct and confident. You’re not one for sugarcoating—when you speak, it’s with passion and decisiveness. This can make you seem bold or even blunt, but for you, honesty and getting to the point are more important than politeness or tact.

Subtlety is not your strong suit; you prefer straightforward conversations and often find it frustrating when things are left unsaid or implied. You excel in debates or competitive environments, where your quick thinking and decisive nature can shine. People around you might feel like they need to keep up with your fast mental pace, as you rarely waste time in conversations or decisions.

To make the most of this Mercury energy, focus on activities that require quick decision-making, like debates, leadership roles, or fast-paced problem-solving. You thrive in environments that value boldness and action, where you can confidently take the lead and communicate with authority.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Sun

In the second decan of Aries, your Mercury is influenced by the Sun, which adds charisma and creativity to your communication style. You’re still quick-minded like the first decan, but now there’s a natural desire to stand out and make an impact with your words. When you speak, people listen—not only because of what you say but because of the way you say it. There’s a magnetic quality to your communication, and you have a flair for expressing yourself in ways that capture attention.

Your thinking is creative and bold, and you enjoy adding a personal touch to everything you say or do. Whether in group discussions, presentations, or creative endeavors, you tend to take the lead and inspire those around you with your confidence and vision. You see challenges as opportunities to express your individuality and creative problem-solving skills.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that let you express your ideas dynamically, such as public speaking, writing, or performing. You thrive in situations where you can take center stage, lead with your voice, and inspire others with your innovative thinking.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Jupiter

If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Aries, your communication is influenced by Jupiter, which gives you a visionary and expansive approach to thinking. You’re not content with small ideas—your mind is constantly searching for the bigger picture and ways to push boundaries. There’s a philosophical edge to your thinking, and you enjoy exploring larger truths and higher ideals. When you speak, you aim to inspire others, often encouraging them to see the world in new and broader ways.

You’re passionate about learning and sharing knowledge, and your communication style reflects this expansive vision. Rather than getting bogged down by details, you focus on big ideas and future-oriented goals. People with this placement are often seen as inspiring communicators, whether they’re teaching, leading, or discussing personal growth.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve exploring and communicating grand ideas. Teaching, public speaking, writing, or working in fields like philosophy, travel, or personal development are ideal for you. You excel when you can inspire others to think bigger and explore new horizons, and you’re happiest when working on projects with a sense of adventure and growth.

𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Taurus, ruled by Venus, your thinking and communication style are steady, grounded, and deliberate. You like to take your time to fully process information and are not easily rushed into making decisions. Your speech is calm and measured, often conveying a sense of authority and ease. There’s a natural beauty in how you express yourself—whether it’s the tone of your voice or the way you choose your words, others feel comfortable listening to you.

Your thoughts tend to revolve around practicality and how ideas can translate into something tangible. You’re not swayed by fleeting trends; instead, you prefer to focus on things that have lasting value. Your thinking process is methodical, carefully weighing all the factors before reaching a conclusion. You rarely act impulsively, which makes others trust your judgment and value your insights.

To make the most of this Mercury placement, focus on activities that require patience and an emphasis on lasting results. Writing, art, or planning that involves creating something beautiful and enduring are ideal for you. You also excel in fields like finance, gardening, or craftsmanship, where your steady and methodical approach can shine.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

In the second decan of Taurus, Mercury’s influence is more pronounced, blending Taurus’ grounded nature with enhanced mental agility. You possess both practicality and intellectual curiosity, which allows you to think clearly and adapt to new information quickly. You’re particularly good at simplifying complex concepts and making them accessible to others. While your thinking is still methodical, you can also be flexible and are keen to learn, making you an excellent problem-solver.

Your communication style is clear and direct, ensuring your message is understood without unnecessary embellishments. You have a practical, no-nonsense approach that makes people trust what you say, as it’s usually based on sound reasoning and real-world experience. Abstract or overly idealistic ideas rarely interest you—you focus on what works and what can be applied in tangible ways.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in roles that combine your practical thinking with clear communication, such as teaching, writing, or working in business environments that require structured problem-solving. Anything involving analysis, planning, or creating order, like project management or education, will allow you to showcase your talents.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn

If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Taurus, Saturn’s influence adds structure, discipline, and a deep sense of responsibility to your thinking. You approach life with a focus on long-term goals and carefully consider the steps needed to achieve stability. Your mind operates methodically, and you tend to look at situations from all angles before making a decision. You’re not easily swayed by short-term thinking—your focus is on creating lasting solutions.

When you speak, people recognize the authority and wisdom in your words. You tend to be someone others turn to for advice because they know you’ve given careful thought to the matter. You’re good at simplifying complex ideas and presenting them in a logical, easy-to-understand way, especially when it comes to long-term planning. While you may appear serious or reserved in your communication, it’s because you value precision and prefer to speak only when you have something meaningful to say.

To maximize this Mercury energy, focus on long-term projects that require patience, planning, and persistence. Whether you’re involved in business, real estate, or building a career that requires slow, steady progress, you thrive in environments where structured thinking and careful planning are needed. Fields like financial planning, architecture, or any project that requires creating a strong, enduring foundation are perfect for your disciplined mindset.

𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Gemini, you embody the pure essence of Mercury’s energy—quick, curious, and endlessly adaptable. Your mind processes information at lightning speed, and you thrive on variety and stimulation. You’re constantly juggling multiple ideas and topics, which keeps your conversations lively and engaging. Learning new things is a passion, and your inquisitive nature makes you a fantastic communicator and conversationalist.

When you speak, your words come out swiftly and articulately, often infused with wit. You have a natural talent for making connections between different ideas, which makes you an asset in any field that requires sharp communication, whether it’s writing, teaching, or public speaking. However, your fast-paced thinking can sometimes cause you to skip over details or move on to the next idea before fully finishing the previous one. Your strength lies in your adaptability, and your ability to think on your feet makes you perfect for dynamic, fast-paced environments.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, pursue activities that involve communication, learning, or networking. Writing, journalism, teaching, and public speaking will all suit your need for constant mental engagement. You’ll also thrive in roles that offer variety and flexibility, as routine can quickly become boring for your restless mind.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

In the second decan of Gemini, Mercury’s quick thinking is blended with Venus’ influence, adding charm, grace, and diplomacy to your communication style. You’re not just a fast thinker—you’re an engaging speaker who knows how to make people feel at ease. There’s a natural flow to your words, and you often use your communication skills to build relationships and create harmony. You have a unique ability to make complex ideas sound appealing and accessible, which makes you excellent at teaching, writing, or public relations.

While your mind is still quick and adaptable, you’re more considerate of how your words are received by others. You avoid harshness in your speech and prefer conversations that are pleasant and cooperative. Venus also brings creativity to your thinking, making you excellent in fields that blend intellect with artistry, such as writing, music, or any form of creative expression that involves communication.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that combine intellect and charm. Public relations, marketing, writing, and creative fields that involve communication and relationship-building are ideal for you. You shine in situations where you can use your words to bring people together and foster understanding.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus

If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Gemini, Uranus’ influence brings an innovative, unconventional edge to your thinking. You’re not just a quick thinker—you’re a visionary, capable of seeing the future and breaking boundaries with your ideas. Your mind is drawn to original concepts, and you’re great at spotting patterns and making connections that others might overlook. This decan gives you a rebellious streak when it comes to communication, as you enjoy pushing the limits of traditional methods and exploring new ways to share information.

When you speak, your words often have a surprising or quirky quality, catching others off guard with your insights or unconventional ideas. You’re not afraid to challenge the status quo, and your communication style can be both inspiring and revolutionary. However, your rapid mental shifts and unorthodox style can sometimes make you seem unpredictable or difficult to follow, especially to those who prefer more traditional ways of thinking.

To best harness your Mercury energy, engage in activities that allow you to explore new ideas and challenge conventional wisdom. Technology, media, innovation, and any field that embraces future-forward thinking will be ideal for you. You thrive in environments where you can experiment with new concepts, so roles that involve invention, creative problem-solving, or research will allow your visionary mind to shine.

𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Cancer, your thoughts and communication are deeply tied to your emotions, influenced strongly by the Moon. You process information with a strong intuitive sense, often relying on how things make you feel rather than just logic. Your mind works in a nurturing and reflective way, and you tend to consider the emotional impact of your words on others before you speak. You have an excellent memory, especially when it comes to emotionally charged or personal experiences, and you recall even the smallest details that hold sentimental value.

When you communicate, you do so with a sense of care and empathy. You instinctively know what to say to make others feel understood and emotionally supported. However, because your emotions and thoughts are so intertwined, it can be hard for you to maintain objectivity in emotionally intense situations.

To make the most of this Mercury energy, engage in activities that require nurturing communication or emotional connection. Writing, counseling, or any profession that involves helping others and using empathy will suit you well. Your ability to connect with others on an emotional level makes you a natural in roles that require compassion and understanding.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto

With Mercury in the second decan of Cancer, Pluto’s influence adds emotional depth and intensity to your thought process. You’re highly intuitive and perceptive, often able to sense the underlying motivations in people’s actions and conversations. Your thinking is investigative, and you’re drawn to uncovering hidden truths or exploring emotional complexities. When you speak, your words carry weight and emotional intensity, often leaving a deep impression on those around you.

You’re not one to shy away from difficult topics or deep emotional discussions. You prefer conversations that provoke transformation or meaningful change. This desire for depth and understanding can make you an excellent problem-solver, though it can also lead to becoming overly fixated on certain thoughts or emotions.

To best utilize this Mercury energy, focus on roles that allow for emotional exploration and transformation. You would excel in fields like psychology, counseling, investigative work, or any area that involves digging deep into emotional or psychological matters. Your ability to perceive and communicate hidden truths makes you a natural healer or guide in transformative processes.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Cancer, Neptune’s influence brings a dreamy, imaginative quality to your thoughts and communication. You’re highly intuitive, and your thinking often drifts into creative, spiritual, or abstract realms. There’s a poetic, almost mystical quality to how you express yourself, and your words are often filled with emotional depth that draws people in. You think in terms of feelings, symbols, and visions rather than hard facts, making you naturally inclined towards artistic or spiritual pursuits.

However, this imaginative thinking can sometimes lead to difficulties in staying focused on practical matters or communicating in a clear, organized way. You may find it challenging to stick to facts or be concise, as your mind prefers to explore emotional and spiritual nuances.

To harness this Mercury energy, engage in creative or spiritual activities that allow your imagination to flourish. Writing, art, music, or any form of creative expression that taps into your deep emotional and intuitive side will help you thrive. Your empathy and imagination make you a natural in fields such as the creative arts, spiritual healing, or roles that require emotional sensitivity and compassion.

𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by the Sun

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Leo, the Sun’s influence gives your communication style a confident, charismatic, and vibrant edge. You think big and express yourself with a flair for the dramatic, often seeking to be seen and heard. Your thoughts are fueled by creativity and leadership, and you're drawn to ambitious ideas that inspire others. You’re not one to shy away from bold statements or grand visions—you want your words to make an impact.

When you speak, there’s an undeniable authority and warmth in your voice, making others naturally gravitate toward you. You communicate with enthusiasm and a sense of self-assurance, often commanding attention effortlessly. However, because you prefer bold strokes, you may sometimes overlook finer details or dismiss opposing views that don’t align with your vision. You pride yourself on expressing your unique thoughts and insights, and sharing your ideas is something you relish.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in roles where you can lead and express yourself. Public speaking, creative writing, or any position that places you in the spotlight will allow you to shine. You excel when you can inspire others through your ideas, making leadership and motivational roles ideal for you.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by the Jupiter

With Mercury in the second decan of Leo, Jupiter’s influence adds a sense of expansiveness and generosity to your communication style. You're not only confident but also eager to share wisdom, ideas, and knowledge with others. You love exploring big-picture concepts, whether related to philosophy, education, or personal growth, and your enthusiasm is contagious.

When you speak, you do so with optimism and vision, often inspiring those around you. People are drawn to your words because of the uplifting and expansive nature of your ideas. You’re always thinking about how things can grow and improve, but this grand-scale thinking sometimes causes you to overlook smaller details or practical matters. You’re much more focused on the larger themes and concepts.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, seek out activities where you can teach, motivate, or share knowledge. Public speaking, coaching, or working in education are excellent outlets for your big-picture thinking. You thrive when you can inspire others with your visionary ideas and help them see the world in a broader, more optimistic light.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Mars

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Leo, Mars’ influence adds drive, assertiveness, and a passionate energy to your communication style. You think and speak with urgency and conviction, and you're not afraid to voice your opinions boldly. You prefer action-oriented thinking and are quick to translate ideas into action, often leading with your words and pushing others to follow.

When you communicate, there's a fiery, dynamic quality to your speech, and people are often energized by your enthusiasm. You speak with purpose, and your words carry a sense of urgency that can be highly motivating. However, your direct approach can sometimes come across as a bit too forceful or domineering, especially when dealing with those who prefer a more measured pace or style.

To harness this Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to take bold action with your ideas. Competitive environments, leadership roles, or careers that require quick thinking and assertive communication will suit you well. You excel when you can channel your passion into action, making you a natural motivator and leader in high-energy situations.

𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Virgo, your mind functions with razor-sharp precision and clarity, thanks to Mercury’s full influence here. You have an exceptional ability to break down complex problems into manageable parts, approaching each issue with analytical rigor. Detail-oriented and practical, you excel at organizing information and thrive in situations that require logic and structured thinking. Efficiency is key to you, and you communicate in a concise, straightforward manner, cutting out unnecessary distractions to focus on what’s important.

When you speak, your focus is on being clear, accurate, and helpful. You value correctness over embellishment, and your critical thinking skills are highly developed, allowing you to quickly spot flaws or inconsistencies. However, this strong attention to detail can sometimes make you overly critical, both of yourself and others, as you strive for perfection.

To make the most of this Mercury energy, pursue activities that require precision, analysis, and systematic thinking. Fields such as research, editing, or any role where you can improve systems or processes will be a great fit for your skills. Your talent for practical problem-solving makes you highly effective in any task requiring structure and order.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn

In the second decan of Virgo, Saturn’s influence adds discipline and responsibility to your already structured mind. You are methodical and patient in your thinking, with a strong focus on long-term planning and practicality. Your communication style is reserved and thoughtful, and you have a gift for organizing not only your own thoughts but also the environments around you. You often feel a sense of duty toward your work, and others look to you for reliable, well-considered solutions.

When you speak, your words carry a sense of authority and gravity, and you value accuracy and careful thought. You rarely make impulsive statements, preferring to ensure that what you say is factually correct and meaningful. This disciplined mindset, however, can sometimes lead to overthinking or being overly critical, as you hold yourself to high standards.

To fully harness your Mercury energy, focus on roles that involve long-term planning, structure, and meticulous attention to detail. You thrive in project management, writing, or any profession that requires discipline and persistence. Your ability to think methodically makes you a natural leader in environments that demand responsibility and careful organization.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Virgo, Venus brings a sense of refinement and creativity to your otherwise analytical thinking. While you still possess the detailed focus typical of Virgo, Venus softens your approach, adding diplomacy and an aesthetic sense to how you process information and communicate. You appreciate harmony and balance, often considering how to make ideas more appealing or how to create beauty in practical tasks.

When you communicate, there is a tactful and graceful quality to your speech. You’re able to explain complex ideas in a way that is not only clear but also pleasing to others. This Venusian influence enhances your creativity, making you particularly skilled at blending logic with beauty—whether in design, writing, or interpersonal communication.

To best use your Mercury energy, engage in activities that allow for both precision and creativity. Fields like design, art, or writing, where attention to detail is combined with an eye for aesthetics, will be ideal. Your ability to balance practicality with creativity makes you a unique and valuable contributor to any project requiring both intellect and elegance.

𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Libra, ruled by Venus, your thinking and communication are marked by a desire for harmony, balance, and beauty. You are a natural diplomat, always seeking to maintain peace in conversations and find common ground between differing viewpoints. Your mind excels at seeing multiple perspectives, making you an adept problem-solver who strives for fairness and solutions that benefit everyone involved.

When you speak, your words are smooth and tactful, often designed to ease tension or foster cooperation. You have a talent for making others feel comfortable, and you carefully choose your words to avoid conflict or offense. Your speech is charming, and you aim to steer discussions towards peaceful outcomes. However, your desire to maintain harmony can sometimes make it difficult for you to make strong, decisive statements, as you are always mindful of the potential impact of your words.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in activities that require diplomacy, collaboration, and social grace. You thrive in roles such as negotiation, mediation, or public relations, where building connections and promoting harmony is key. You also do well in creative fields, like design or writing, where aesthetics and balance are important. Your ability to see both sides of an issue and create peaceful solutions makes you a natural peacemaker.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus

In the second decan of Libra, Uranus adds a layer of innovation and originality to your thinking and communication. You enjoy exploring new ideas, challenging conventional wisdom, and thinking outside the box, particularly when it comes to issues of fairness and equality. Your mind is quick to adapt to new trends, and you often find creative ways to approach problems, bringing fresh ideas to the table.

When you speak, your words often carry a sense of excitement and originality. People are drawn to your progressive thinking and your ability to see things from new perspectives. You challenge traditional approaches but do so with respect for others' viewpoints, balancing innovation with diplomacy. Your communication style is stimulating and inclusive, making you an excellent contributor in group settings or discussions where multiple perspectives are needed.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that blend your creativity with your natural sense of fairness. You excel in roles related to social reform, technology, or design, where innovative thinking and collaboration are key. Your ability to push boundaries while maintaining respect for others makes you a powerful force for change in any team or community effort.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Libra, Mercury’s influence is particularly strong, sharpening your intellect and enhancing your communication skills. You are an eloquent speaker and a skilled conversationalist, particularly in areas related to fairness, beauty, and relationships. Your mind is quick and adaptable, and you have a natural ability to express your ideas in a clear, persuasive manner.

Your speech is articulate and polished, and you’re particularly adept at navigating social situations and complex conversations. You enjoy intellectual discussions and debates, but you approach them with a sense of balance and fairness, always considering the other person’s point of view. While your diplomatic nature is one of your strengths, it can sometimes make it difficult for you to take a firm stance on an issue, as you prefer to remain neutral and open-minded.

To harness your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve intellectual exchange, communication, and social interaction. You excel in roles such as teaching, counseling, law, or any field that requires mediation and clear thinking. Your ability to navigate complex ideas with charm and precision makes you a natural leader in conversations and problem-solving situations.

𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Scorpio, Pluto's influence gives your mind an intense, focused, and probing quality. You have a natural curiosity for what lies beneath the surface and are driven to uncover hidden truths. You excel at research, investigation, and any activity that requires deep concentration and persistence. Your thinking is strategic and you rarely settle for superficial answers, making you highly effective at problem-solving.

When you communicate, your words carry depth and intensity. People sense there’s something profound in what you say, even if you don’t reveal everything outright. Your communication style is often direct and can be quite powerful, as you have a knack for cutting through superficiality and getting straight to the core of an issue. However, your intensity may sometimes make others feel exposed or uncomfortable, as you often bring to light things they might prefer to keep hidden.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on areas where investigative thinking and psychological insight are key. Fields such as research, psychology, or detective work are ideal for you. Your ability to think deeply and communicate with conviction makes you a forceful and persuasive speaker, especially in emotionally or intellectually charged discussions.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune

In the second decan of Scorpio, Neptune’s influence brings a blend of deep intuition and imagination to your thinking and communication. Your mind is not only penetrating but also visionary, and you often navigate the world through a combination of logic and intuition. You are highly sensitive to the emotional undercurrents of any situation and may often sense things that others miss. This heightened intuition gives you a unique perspective on life, and you are drawn to subjects that delve into the mystical, spiritual, or psychological.

When you speak, there’s often an air of mystery or emotional depth to your words. You communicate in a way that touches others on a profound level, often sparking deeper emotional or spiritual insights. You are especially drawn to conversations about life’s deeper mysteries, such as the nature of existence, spirituality, and transformation. However, your tendency to rely on intuition can sometimes make your thoughts difficult for others to follow, and you may prefer to keep certain ideas or feelings private.

To harness your Mercury energy, engage in creative or spiritual pursuits that allow you to blend intellect and intuition. Writing, counseling, or any work in psychology or the arts will help you channel your deep insights. Your ability to combine emotional sensitivity with intellectual depth makes you a captivating communicator, particularly in conversations that require emotional or spiritual insight.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Scorpio, the Moon’s influence heightens your emotional awareness and sensitivity, making your thoughts and communication deeply connected to your feelings. You have a natural ability to understand both your own and others’ emotional states, which gives you profound insight into human behavior and motivations. Your thinking blends emotional intelligence with intellectual depth, and you are especially interested in understanding the emotional dynamics at play in any situation.

When you communicate, your words are infused with emotion and sensitivity. You’re drawn to emotionally charged conversations, and you often speak from a place of vulnerability and truth. People are drawn to your empathy and your ability to articulate complex emotions. However, because your thinking is so intertwined with your feelings, you may sometimes dwell on emotional wounds or find it difficult to detach from past experiences.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to tap into your emotional depth, such as counseling, writing, or any role that requires empathy and emotional intelligence. Your ability to communicate with emotional clarity and authenticity makes you a powerful presence in any conversation, especially when emotional support or understanding is needed.

𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Jupiter

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter, you have a mind that craves exploration, knowledge, and growth. You’re driven by a sense of curiosity and optimism, constantly seeking to understand life’s larger truths. Whether it’s through travel, study, or philosophical debate, you thrive on expanding your horizons and pushing the boundaries of your intellect. You naturally gravitate toward big-picture thinking and enjoy pondering abstract concepts like morality, culture, and spirituality.

When you speak, your enthusiasm is contagious. Your communication style is optimistic and full of energy, making others feel excited by your ideas. You love sharing what you’ve learned with others, and your storytelling ability often brings your ideas to life in a vivid, inspiring way. However, you might sometimes skip over practical details, as your focus is more on the broader vision than on day-to-day realities. You have a tendency to be direct and forthright, which can sometimes come off as blunt, but your intent is always to motivate and inspire.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to expand your knowledge and share it with others. Teaching, writing, journalism, or even roles in travel or cultural exchange are ideal for you. You excel when you can communicate big ideas and inspire others to broaden their perspectives, making you a natural philosopher, teacher, or visionary thinker.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mars

In the second decan of Sagittarius, Mars adds a layer of passion and drive to your already expansive mindset. You still crave knowledge and exploration, but now you approach these pursuits with a more assertive, action-oriented mindset. Your thoughts are fast-paced, and you don’t hesitate to jump into debates or discussions where you can defend your ideas with conviction. You’re naturally drawn to challenging conversations, seeing them as opportunities to refine your beliefs and take action on the causes you care about.

When you communicate, there’s an urgency to your words. You speak with passion and authority, often encouraging others to take immediate action on the ideas you discuss. People are drawn to your boldness, but your directness can sometimes come off as argumentative or confrontational, especially if you’re debating a topic you’re passionate about. You enjoy intellectual challenges and are quick to challenge others to think more deeply about their own beliefs.

To best use your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine your intellectual curiosity with your desire to take action. Advocacy, politics, teaching, or coaching are excellent outlets for your dynamic communication style. Your ability to inspire others to move forward with passion and conviction makes you a powerful motivator, especially in environments that require leadership and a strong voice for change.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Sun

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Sagittarius, the Sun’s influence brings a charismatic and confident energy to your thinking and communication. You’re not only interested in exploring big ideas and philosophical questions, but you also see yourself as a leader who can inspire others through your words. There’s a sense of personal pride in your ability to communicate, and you enjoy being seen as someone with a strong vision and the ability to motivate others toward personal growth.

When you speak, your words are infused with authority and optimism. You have a natural warmth that draws people in, and your confidence in your ideas makes others feel inspired and uplifted. You’re excellent at presenting big-picture concepts in a way that feels relatable and empowering, and you take pride in your ability to motivate and lead. However, your strong sense of self-expression can sometimes come across as overly confident or preachy, particularly if you’re deeply invested in the topic at hand.

To best harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to take center stage and inspire others with your vision. Public speaking, teaching, leadership roles, or any field that allows you to share your knowledge and motivate others are perfect for you. Your ability to see the bigger picture and communicate it in a way that feels empowering makes you a natural leader, especially in situations that require enthusiasm, optimism, and a sense of adventure.

𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Capricorn, ruled by Saturn, your mind is focused, disciplined, and geared toward achieving practical results. You think strategically, with a strong emphasis on long-term goals and the steps needed to reach them. Patience and precision define your thought process, and you’re careful not to make decisions hastily. Your communication style is efficient, direct, and often focused on practical, real-world matters rather than abstract or theoretical concepts. You value structure and like to ensure that whatever you say or do leads to concrete outcomes.

When you speak, your words carry weight and authority, often making others take you seriously. You avoid unnecessary embellishments, preferring clear and concise language that gets straight to the point. People respect your logical, grounded approach, but sometimes you may come across as overly serious or rigid, especially in casual or spontaneous conversations. Your strength lies in your ability to think ahead and lay out plans that lead to long-term success.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that require structure, organization, and strategic planning. You excel in roles like business, law, project management, or anything that involves long-term planning and responsibility. Your ability to communicate with authority and a clear, practical mindset makes you a natural leader in environments that prioritize efficiency and results.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

In the second decan of Capricorn, Venus adds a layer of charm, diplomacy, and refinement to your disciplined thinking. While you still value practicality and structure, you have a way of softening your communication style to appeal to others’ emotions and sense of aesthetics. You’re thoughtful in your approach, balancing your goal-oriented mindset with an awareness of how your words and actions impact others. This makes you not only strategic but also tactful, which is a great asset in social or professional negotiations.

When you speak, you do so with elegance and grace. You understand how to blend logic with persuasion, making you an effective communicator, particularly in situations that require diplomacy. You can navigate tough conversations with ease, offering solutions that satisfy both practical and emotional needs. However, because you value appearances and harmony, you might sometimes gloss over deeper emotional issues in favor of maintaining balance.

To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine your practical mindset with a sense of diplomacy and style. You excel in fields like marketing, management, design, or any role where strategy and aesthetics intersect. Your ability to think practically while communicating with grace and tact makes you well-suited for roles that require both intelligence and charm.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Capricorn, Mercury’s influence sharpens your intellect and enhances your analytical abilities. Your mind is highly organized and efficient, capable of breaking down complex problems into logical, step-by-step solutions. You think systematically and are always focused on how to achieve the most practical and productive outcomes. Your communication is straightforward and precise—you prefer to get to the heart of the matter without wasting time on unnecessary details.

When you speak, your words are clear and to the point, and you have a knack for explaining difficult concepts in simple terms. You’re highly focused on logic and results, which makes you an excellent problem-solver in any situation. However, your emphasis on practicality and efficiency can sometimes make you appear detached or overly focused on the task at hand, which may lead to neglecting emotional or creative considerations.

To best harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that involve problem-solving, analysis, and structured communication. You excel in fields like engineering, finance, law, or consulting, where logical thinking and precision are highly valued. Your ability to streamline complex ideas and communicate them effectively makes you an asset in any environment that requires clear thinking and careful planning.

𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Aquarius, ruled by Uranus, your mind is highly inventive and unconventional. You have a natural talent for thinking outside the box and thrive on exploring new, cutting-edge ideas. You're intellectually curious, drawn to innovation and progress, and always looking toward the future. Your thinking is abstract, visionary, and often ahead of its time. You enjoy analyzing problems from unique angles and are often excited by challenges that require creative solutions.

When you speak, your words are infused with originality and a forward-thinking energy. You're great at discussing concepts that push boundaries, and you enjoy surprising others with your fresh insights. People appreciate your ability to spark innovative discussions, though your focus on intellectual matters may sometimes make you seem detached from more personal or emotional topics.

To best utilize your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve innovation, technology, or social reform. You excel in fields that allow you to explore futuristic ideas and challenge conventional wisdom, such as technology, science, or activism. Your ability to think far beyond the present makes you a natural leader in any area that values progress and originality.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury

In the second decan of Aquarius, Mercury's influence sharpens your intellectual abilities, making you an exceptionally quick and analytical thinker. You have a natural curiosity about the world, and you're always seeking out new information and ways to process it. Your mind is logical, objective, and versatile, and you excel at communicating complex ideas in simple, understandable terms. You’re skilled at finding patterns and connections that others may miss, making you an insightful problem-solver.

When you speak, your words are clear, concise, and often thought-provoking. You enjoy discussing a wide range of topics and are great at sparking intellectual debates. Your ability to see multiple perspectives allows you to contribute valuable insights to group discussions, though your strong focus on logic can sometimes make you appear detached or less emotionally engaged.

To fully harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that require quick thinking, analysis, and effective communication. You thrive in roles like teaching, writing, research, or technology, where your ability to synthesize information and share it with others is highly valued. Your sharp intellect and versatility make you a great fit for positions that involve problem-solving and intellectual exploration.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Aquarius, Venus brings a sense of creativity, beauty, and social grace to your communication style. While you still maintain the intellectual brilliance and forward-thinking qualities of Mercury in Aquarius, Venus adds an element of charm and diplomacy to how you express yourself. You're not just interested in new ideas—you also want to find ways to connect people through those ideas, often blending intellect with creativity to inspire others.

When you speak, there's a smooth, engaging quality to your words. You enjoy discussing complex ideas in a way that is both accessible and enjoyable for others, and you're great at making intellectual conversations feel fun and appealing. People are drawn to your blend of intelligence and social charm, though you may sometimes prioritize harmony and social connection over diving deeply into more challenging or abstract concepts.

To best use your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine creativity with intellectual pursuits. You thrive in fields like design, the arts, social reform, or any area where you can apply your visionary thinking to improve society or create beauty. Your ability to think originally while maintaining a sense of balance and charm makes you a natural fit for roles that require both innovation and social connection.

𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲

First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune

If your Mercury is in the first decan of Pisces, ruled by Neptune, your mind is fluid, intuitive, and deeply imaginative. You think in terms of emotions and abstract ideas, often perceiving things in ways that others might not immediately understand. Your thoughts tend to drift towards the mystical, creative, and spiritual realms, making you highly attuned to subtleties and nuances that others might miss. Rather than focusing on hard facts, you interpret the world through feelings and sensations, giving your communication a poetic, dreamy quality.

When you speak, you have a natural ability to convey deep emotions and complex ideas in a way that resonates with others on a heartfelt level. People are often drawn to the sensitivity and depth of your words, and you can soothe or inspire them with your empathetic and compassionate nature. However, because your thoughts are so connected to your emotions, you may sometimes struggle to articulate your ideas clearly or stay grounded in practical details.

To best use your Mercury energy, focus on creative or spiritual pursuits where your imagination and empathy can shine. Fields like writing, music, art, or healing practices that require an intuitive approach are perfect for you. Your gift for communicating abstract concepts in an emotionally resonant way makes you a natural in roles that involve emotional connection and creative expression.

Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon

In the second decan of Pisces, the Moon’s influence adds even more emotional sensitivity and introspection to your thinking and communication style. Your mind is reflective, intuitive, and deeply in touch with the feelings of those around you. You process information through an emotional lens, making you particularly skilled at understanding the needs and moods of others. You are a natural nurturer, and your thoughts often gravitate toward how you can help or care for the people in your life.

When you communicate, your words are gentle, comforting, and full of empathy. You have a way of making others feel heard and supported, and people often turn to you when they need emotional guidance. However, your strong connection to your emotions can sometimes make it difficult for you to remain objective or detached in conversations, especially when feelings are involved. You may also find that you are easily affected by the emotional states of others, which can sometimes lead to overwhelm.

To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to provide emotional support or care for others. Counseling, therapy, or any field where emotional intelligence is key would be ideal for you. Your ability to communicate with kindness and understanding makes you a valuable asset in any role that requires empathy and nurturing.

Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto

If your Mercury is in the third decan of Pisces, Mars adds a subtle drive and assertiveness to your typically gentle and emotionally intuitive communication style. While you still possess the dreamy, imaginative qualities of Mercury in Pisces, Mars gives you a stronger sense of purpose and the motivation to act on your ideas. You are not just content to dream; you want to turn your visions into reality, especially when they are connected to something you are passionate about. Your thinking is driven by both your emotions and a desire to take action on those feelings.

When you speak, your words carry more conviction and passion than the typical Mercury in Pisces. You are able to express your emotions with intensity, and you aren’t afraid to stand up for what you believe in or advocate for those you care about. There’s a fire behind your words that can make you a powerful communicator, particularly when it comes to issues that stir your emotions. However, your emotional intensity can sometimes lead to impulsive or reactive communication, especially when you feel strongly about something.

To best use your Mercury energy, engage in activities that combine emotional depth with action. You excel in roles where you can channel your passion into helping or inspiring others, such as activism, teaching, or any work that involves motivating people. Your ability to communicate with both sensitivity and strength makes you a natural advocate for causes or people that are close to your heart.

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

[kavumas-blog]

My Life as a Queer Refugee: A Story of Struggle, Survival, and Hope

As a queer person, I once believed I could live authentically in my home country. But as I came out, everything changed. What I thought was a community that might support me turned against me, and I found myself in danger, rejected by family, friends, and society. Forced to flee my home to seek safety, I traveled to Kenya hoping for asylum, only to face even more hardship. Now, living in yet another country, I continue to struggle, not only with the trauma of being a refugee but with the daily fight to survive as a queer person.

My journey as a queer refugee has been one of immense pain and loss. When I left my country, I was running from violence—both physical and emotional. In Kenya, I hoped to find protection and safety, but what I encountered was indifference and exclusion. I wasn’t safe there either. Once again, I had to flee, moving to a neighboring country in search of refuge, but the discrimination followed me.

Living as a refugee is already incredibly difficult. The lack of basic necessities—food, medication, housing—is a constant strain. But being queer adds another layer of struggle. I often find myself isolated, marginalized by both the community I seek to integrate with and the very system that is supposed to protect me. There is no safety net, and the fear of violence or rejection is a constant presence in my life.

The systems in place often fail us. Many refugees are denied the support they desperately need, not because they aren’t worthy, but because their identities—especially their queer identities—make them vulnerable to further discrimination. The global refugee system has not yet adequately addressed the unique needs of LGBTQ+ refugees, and this is why the suffering continues.

What’s worse is that it’s not just about the physical survival—it's about the emotional toll it takes. Every day I fight to exist as myself, but too often, the world makes it feel like that’s a fight I can’t win. My story is not unique. There are countless queer refugees who face the same struggles of survival and the constant question: "Where can I go to be safe?"

But there is hope. This struggle is not just mine—it's shared by many, and it’s through awareness and action that we can make a difference. We need to advocate for better protections for queer refugees, for policies that take our unique struggles into account. We need organizations to provide not just shelter, but the mental and emotional support necessary for survival. And we need the wider public to open their hearts, understand our pain, and help us amplify our voices.

I urge you, if you’re reading this, to take action. Donate to my fundraiser. Advocate for policies that protect us, and raise awareness about the discrimination we face. Share our stories—let us be heard. The world must understand that queer refugees are not just statistics, but human beings fighting for the right to live openly and safely.

The fight is ongoing, but with support, it’s one we can win. I am more than my struggle, and together, we can ensure that every queer refugee has the chance to live without fear, to be themselves fully, and to survive with dignity.

[paranoiddreams]

Pt. 1

You and Sukuna are officially parents to the most rambunctious kitten in the entire world; something you can’t help but blame your cursed boyfriend for. You both don’t really have a name for her yet, because she has such a unique personality it would feel wrong to call her something that didn’t fit perfectly. You’ve dropped a few names randomly, trying to test them out, but Sukuna is clearly unsatisfied with every one.

“Come here Moon! Here Moonie!”

“Moon? What the hell are you calling it that for?”

“You don’t like the name? I thought of Moon because she likes to look out the window at the moon every night! I’ve been trying out a few. I also thought about Sugar—“

“Why the hell would we name that thing something so sweet when it’s a complete menace?!”

Let’s just say, Sukuna is not going to accept any name he thinks is too ‘soft’ or ‘sweet’. Because whether he’ll admit it or not, his daughter is exactly like him, and needs a fear-inducing name like his.

“How about Zozo?”

“You mean the Ouija board demon?!”

“Or maybe Valak. That’s a powerful female name.”

“THATS THE NAME OF THE DEMON IN THE CONJURING??!!”

He’s got a bunch of demonology books anyways (bc he’s a nerd lowkey) and he’s pointing all of these outlandish names out to you, suggesting some that aren’t even in languages humans can understand. He tried to suggest others that were less offensive, like ‘Malevolent’, which you almost picked on account of ‘Mal’ being a cute nickname, and you were tired of calling your child ‘kitty’ all the time. But then, almost out of the blue, Sukuna seemed to have a change of heart.

You both came home through the front door after a long day, exhausted and worn out, like usual. But, like you’d both forgotten about your new addition to the family for a second, the sound of meowing and tiny paws on the tiled floor startled you both. Sukuna looked down at his feet immediately, only to find the nameless kitten trying to climb on top of his boot. Her little meows became cries as she begged for his attention, obviously having missed you both after being gone for so long.

“Aww, Kuna, she missed you!” You cooed at them, finding the sight too cute to ignore. You look up at your boyfriend’s face expecting to find his usual scowl, but you’re even more surprised when you don’t—he’s staring blankly at the kitten he supposedly hated a few days ago, but the corners of his lips curl up ever so slightly.

You decide to stay silent, not wanting to ruin the moment. Sukuna leans down and picks up the struggling kitten, still not successful in her attempts to climb his pant leg, and holds her to his chest.

“I suppose coming home to this little thing isn’t so bad,” he whispered, still looking down at her furry face as she paws at his shirt, “isn’t that right, little Akuma?”

Demonologist!Sukuna is a fascination of mine, and NO it’s not because I almost took a semester on it🤫. I love me some demons, what can I say? Also, thank you guys so much for the name ideas in the comments of part one, you’re all so cute and creative I love you guys so much. I hope you all like the name I picked for the little fur ball in the end😫🙏🏻

[celestialholz]

Live long and fuck in Hondas (or 'why that Vulcan salute is way more significant than you think it is')

Hey. Hey Holz. Did you know Deadpool and Wolverine fucked in the Odyessy? Did you know that they now live in a one-bed with Blind Al? Did you know that -

Yes, friend. I know all of it. And you're all super fucking valid for pointing it out.

... But maybe all of you aren't seasoned Trekkies like me. Maybe not all of you gorgeous people understand the true significance of this.

Or maybe you just want a definitive way to win the argument of "are these two fucking?"

But either way, I'm here to help, and to tell you why, amongst all the absurdly homoerotic text of this film, this moment? Might be the gayest of them all.

Now, we must start by saying that although you wouldn't know it from the bullshit Abrams films, these two:

Are the fathers of gay fanfiction. Spock and Kirk here are the reason you're living in the fantastic timeline where you can write/read men fucking without any other shred of plot and that this is a legitimate and normalised internet experience - everyone say thank you, iconic papas. These guys were so homoerotically coded that even in the 60s, the era of wondrously overdramatic performances of all kinds and fairly prevalent homophobia, The Girlies still took notice, still started mailing each other fics and making zines and being just hugely excited at the thought of these two getting space-married. They are fandom as we know it today's beginning, and seventy years later they're still an enduringly popular ship on AO3. (You should all go and watch Amok Time, by the way. Contains the Honda Odyessy scene of the 60s, except there's weird biology and wrestling and just go and put it on your screens, thank me later. They fucked on that planet.)

Anyway, these two were as close as early colour TV could ever allow two men to be, deepening their *coughs* friendship almost every single episode or film - Trek's creator Gene Roddenberry even gave them a unique word in Spock's Vulcan language, with the meaning of 'friend, brother, lover.' (And if that isn't ringing any Poolverine bells, I'm not actually sure what you want out of this post. Enjoy it anyway, love you.)

... And then we get to 1982's The Wrath of Khan, and to that moment that every iconic screen couple must face - the ol' classic, it's you or me and I won't let it be you.

Sure, the set-up's a little different here - the chamber Spock's in is filled with radiation, and the scene's quieter, softer. And Kirk isn't a mutant so he can't smash his way in, he can just sit there and inwardly die as his emotional support Vulcan does.

... But you get where I'm coming from here. Ryan Reynolds doesn't take a million other potential love scenes from across the cinematic ages - no, he takes this. What is for many the romantic acknowledgement of a whole generation. The humble and desperately sweet beginning of it everything we fans know and love nowadays. The most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in television, directly comparative to what is now arguably the most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in cinema. And lest we forget, Wade doesn't believe in a fourth wall - this is a conscious choice, both in canon and in the writer's room.

Oh it's so clever and so beautiful a girl could weep. Ryan just introduced the MCU to the gays, just as Kirk and Spock did all those years ago to the masses of the time.

And then there's what it means.

This is the Vulcan salute, created to mean either 'live long and prosper' or 'peace and long life' - it's used more or less interchangeably.

But part of that's irrelevant when you're as immortal as these two.

So we're left with the sentiments of prosperity and peace, given to a man who up to this point can't imagine ever prospering again, is the furthest thing away from being at peace. Wade gives Logan the opportunity to go on, to find the things he's been lacking for so long now - things he has already helped him find. Spock tells Kirk during The Wrath that 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few,' and that's exactly what Wade's doing here - sacrificing himself for the greater good of his friends and his newly beloved, however much it will hurt them all.

And that's lovely, and poignant, and character-growing, and I think we all would have been content to leave it at that and have our noble sacrifice, however much we would have wept. Kirk goes on to find the remnants of Spock's soul in the next film in the series, to bring him essentially back from the dead because he felt it was more than his own soul's worth not to have done... which, again, ringing a bell anyone?

Because Logan, in not so many words, tells dear Wade to fuck right off, and we get this.

What we've got here is a direct translation of one of cinema's gayest moments, made somehow infinitely more gay. A true achievement here - I genuinely think I spontaneously acquired tetanus in the cinema for a good minute, my jaw dropped so hard on seeing this. The pillars are the same colour as Kirk and Spock's original uniforms, for fuck's sake. I'm dying out here.

What we've done here is create narrative equality. The whole film's kinda done that leading up to this anyway - they're both mentally fucked up men who can't die, who are constantly dying anyway, who are evenly-matched in battle and both enjoy Honda fucking, who have forged a real love even as they piss each other off at every turn.

But here, they place one another in narrative equality for the first time. It's not about a sacrifice, not now, even though they're assuming it is one - it's about what should be done. It's about righting wrongs, being heroes, being together because every option other than that is unacceptable, because neither understands quite how to lose anyone else. They've both made the same choice, and that's not to let the other die alone.

It's about holding hands and loving and never letting go, even if it kills them.

... It's just about the most romantic and gorgeous thing I've ever fucking seen.

There are no more instances of masks, once they're done in this station. They don't need them any longer; they will never need them again.

And that's only emphasised by the parting shot we get of this... almost directly after Vanessa and Wade share a final sweet look.

I don't know, man. It's almost like the true conclusion is hidden behind the acceptable masquerade. Imagine that in the MCU, folks.

They've taken one of the most intimate and sweet moments in screen history, and made even more glorious.

They did The Wrath of Khan better than The Wrath of Khan did it.

And that's... that's gay. That's just about the gayest thing they could ever have done, and I adore it to the smallest pieces.

So remember, the next time your friends disbelieve you... show 'em this. Show them that they redid the very beginnings of slash fandom, and did it better.

(And then you can add on that they now live in a one-bed with their grandma, daughter and dog, and will do for the rest of their lives. Kirk and Spock didn't even get THAT shit.)

[eldritchamy]

I think I've figured out a good way to articulate one of the reasons Human Domestication Guide is hitting for me in a way really not much else has done for a long time.

HDG is an inverse fandom.

Whereas a lot of fanfiction (maybe just for the sake of the pun we can expand outwards, wink, and call them "transformative works") takes at the core of its nature a specific character or group of characters, and then transplants (sorry, I had to) those characters into Alternate Universes in order to keep telling altered, revised, and original stories with those CHARACTERS, while changing everything else, HDG does the opposite.

It takes the SETTING as the core defining feature, and creates original CHARACTERS in order to tell original stories.

And that's really cool for reasons that, of course, ended up becoming another gigantic one of Amy's Patented Infodump Posts.

Most fanfiction gets to appeal to its audience because of the associations and attachments readers have for the CHARACTERS, and then create a new story from there without having to spend time setting up WHO THE STORY IS ABOUT for you. I don't say this as a bad thing, that's just the attraction. The readers bring their attachment to the characters WITH them before they start reading.

HDG gets to assume you understand the SETTING as a basic premise, and then tell new stories with original characters without having to hold your hand through as much of the set up work, because you already know the SETTING going in.

So instead of discovering how the characters you know relate to a world you don't (and to each other within that context), you get stories where you get to discover who the characters ARE, in the context of a world you already understand.

It's not "what does a different setting do to these characters." It's "how do different people navigate this setting."

You get to meet and learn and identify with the CHARACTERS because you see how they as unique people react to a set premise.

So much of what I've read so far has done exceptional work establishing who the characters are, even making MINOR characters within the story feel like fleshed out people.

You'd think in a setting that takes at face value the premise of humanity being subjugated and doted on by a species that uses mind control drugs to turn them into docile, obedient pets, the stories would struggle a bit with sameness as the individuality of the characters failed to shine through or were inevitably suppressed over the course of the plot.

In practice, it seems like almost the OPPOSITE is true.

The Affini always win. But every character chooses to lose to them in a different way that speaks to who they are as people.

Getting to explore these unique stories through the eyes of unique characters seems like it's making it EASIER to latch on to what makes THESE characters the focus of the stories being told.

And so far the stories being told are fucking great, and have such a huge range to them.

The original story for the setting is a VERY non consensual medfet/drug play subjugation story where Elvira (captain of a ship for the Free Terran feralist rebellion) is ABSOLUTELY brought into domestication by force (at first), and we get to see the PROCESS of her being broken down and becoming something new over the course of (what we later learn has been ONLY) about three weeks. She's not the same person she was at the start of the story. At all. She's been utterly replaced by a new identity and personality that the old version of her would never have accepted. (Also it's kinda hot that it's actually good for her, and that she very much DOES end up happier for it. She's still Elvira. But she's safe, and she's loved.)

That's a pretty specific vibe for a story.

But the next story I read in the setting takes place over the course of several hours in-universe, and basically follows a dysfunctional, clearly neurodivergent woman stagnating in the limbo of having been failed by capitalism (or in her mind, failing at it) and having mixed feelings about the staggeringly powerful alien civilization that is currently part way through conquering her planet and its people.

The story starts off when she's so hungry after scraping through what scant, nutritionless garbage she was able to find in the capitalist dystopia that it finally overrides her fear, and she goes to the border of Affini-controlled territory in her city. She figures, they're going to do whatever they're going to do to the rest of the city within a few days anyway, so there's no sense pretending whatever outcome she's walking into wasn't inevitable, and even if it's not as good as the Affini promise, at least it's not what she's been stuck in. Fear of sameness finally becomes more traumatic than fear of change.

She proceeds to go on an adorable lesbian grocery date with a 10 foot tall plant that gently flirts with her while remaining very firm that all of this human's needs CAN and SHOULD and WILL be taken care of FOR her from now on, and it's OKAY that she has trouble focusing because it's OKAY that some people need more help than others.

She spends several chapters experiencing repeated Lesbian Bluescreens because of this sweet, doting alien who insists it's no trouble at all and she's happy to help. Then said alien takes her back to her apartment on the human side to make sure she feels safe getting there through the anti-Affini protests, and then in a matter of minutes she has cleaned this girl's entire disaster of an apartment and promised to cook her a nice Terran pizza.

Then the girl has a lesbian panic attack while coming to terms with how much misery she didn't have to be living with, and whether this future isn't exactly what she always hoped for and more, so the alien offers to give her some alien drugs to calm her down, and her now fuzzy brain accidentally crumbles under the weight of all the secret petplay fantasies that have been turning her face red all morning and she accidentally calls the alien "Mistress", and then she goes home to THEIR place back in Affini territory with her new owner and gets absolutely spoiled until she falls asleep feeling safe and loved for the first time in her life.

COMPLETE tonal shift from the original story, but the LOGIC of the story is fully consistent with the setting. It's just a different character responding to that setting in a different way.

The range of what's possible is ENORMOUS.

I went from there to "two humans captured at different times struggle to find their way back to each other and end up with neural implants plugged into each other's brains by their shared Mistress, and the feedback loop helps them domesticate EACH OTHER" and then from there to a mostly historical context story about an Affini who lived for almost 300,000 years and how she feels about the Compact's role in everything they've done to the universe.

And then I got to read "I have to pretend to be a good little floret maid at an Affini Compact hotel because that's my Genius Spy Cover WHOOPS it turns out being a maid means getting teased and played with a lot WHOOPS, OHHhhh NOOOoo~ I'VE BEEN TURNED INTO A FREE USE HYPNO DOLL because EVERYONE KNEW I WAS A SPY THE WHOLE TIME, I'm going to resolve my mixed feelings by erotically betraying my co-conspirator so we can be floret girlfriends together," which was cute, funny, and INCREDIBLY hot.

Seriously, chapter 10 of that story. Holy FUCK. I think my brain has turned fully inside out. I had a DREAM kinda like it afterwards that I wish I could remember more of.

I guess my point is HDG is less like a fandom and more like DND.

It's a shared universe of collaborative storytelling, even if any individual work within it was made by one person.

You get to play within a core set of rules for how the setting works, but the stories that can come out of playing by those rules are so incredible and diverse and interesting, and I'm really enjoying getting to explore all of that within the context of a basic premise that has absolutely grabbed most of my kinks by the throat, stared menacingly into my eyes, and smirked knowingly.

Also it's INCREDIBLY queer and very obviously made specifically for gay autistic trans women who take progesterone, so I guess just like the rest of the little Terrans, I never stood a chance.

[puzzled-pegasus]

Here's some silly little metaphors that I think the dragon tribes would use

SkyWings

“Don’t count your clutch before they hatch.” (Don't plan too much too soon)

“Gold is better than silver, but silver is better than nothing.” (If you can't do it perfectly, still try your best. Most dragons forget the second part.)

“‘Sorry’ can't suck the fire back in.” (The damage is done and now you're dead to me.)

“You been eating too much burnt meat or something?” (Are you nuts?)

“Stop all this smoke and use your fire.” (Stop rambling and get to the point already; or stop complaining and do something)

“Doesn't know his tail from his wings.” (Stupid or clumsy)

“You fly like a depressed pigeon.” (Slow flier)

“There's no fire in a rainstorm.” (Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get to work.)

“Nighttime is for the NightWings.” (What are you doing up? Go to sleep.)

SandWings

“She’s all rattle, and no strike.” (Like all bark no bite)

“A diamond in a pile of quartz.” (Like a needle in a haystack)

“You’re watering the cactus and ignoring the sapling.” (You’re focusing on the wrong thing; barking up the wrong tree)

“Everyone thinks the camel looks silly until the dry season comes.” (Don't listen to them, they don't know how unique and strong you are)

MudWings

“Crocodile tears.” (Fake crying in order to gain sympathy)

“You can only catch a trout if your mouth is open.” (Be open to new experiences)

“If the tree gives away too much, it ends up as a stump.” (Don't let people take advantage of your generosity)

SeaWings

“Happy as a clam in high water.” (Very happy)

“The flying fish feels like a fool when it sees an osprey.” (Don't compare yourself to others, run your own race.)

“Plenty of fish in the sea.” (Plenty more opportunities to come.)

“You’ve got ink in your eyes.” (You're blind to something important)

“Lobsters only die when they don't leave their shell.” (Keep yourself busy with new experiences and you'll life a long life)

NightWings

“Sleep is for the dead.” (Why waste your time sleeping when you could be productive)

“SeaWings know their fish and SandWings know their cactuses, but we NightWings know everything else.”(NightWing supremacy propaganda)

“Being nice to a deer never got one in my mouth.” (Other dragons don't matter, only your goals.)

“A prophecy always comes true.” (I told you so but more cryptic)

"You're counting the stars." (You're doing something tedious towards an unachievable goal)

RainWings

“Gray’s her favorite color.” (She's a huge bummer)

“A lemon is yellow on the outside, doesn't mean they're not sour.” (Referring to someone who is two faced or fake)

“I love honey, but I’d rather not get stung by the bees.” (I could do this, but it requires effort so I don't wanna)

“Nobody likes a rotten banana.” (Nobody likes a bummer/downer)

“Don't tie your tail in a knot” (don't get all upset)

“I have all my berries in a basket” (I have everything sorted out)

“You couldn't sneak up on a pineapple” (insult to one's camouflage skills, popular among children)

IceWings

“The seal who asks why the orca is chasing him is the first to get eaten.” (A favorite of parents telling their kids to shut up)

“Not the sharpest icicle on the roof” (kinda stupid or slow)

“Clear as polished ice” (i understand or see it very well)

“You're looking a little pink in the face” (you look sickly. IceWings can turn pink from eating too much krill; a symptom of malnutrition. This line can be applied to any illness.)

“Blue blood kills, red blood spills.” (Patriotic propaganda implying that IceWings win every fight

“The SkyWings toss their blue eyed hatchlings because they're worried they'll be as strong as an IceWing.” (More propaganda)

HiveWings

“Pretty is for the SilkWings.” (Vanity is stupid and impractical)

“If it buzzes like a bug and bites like a bug, it's a bug.” (Don't ignore the obvious)

“Clearsight works in mysterious ways.” (I don't know the answer to your question, now go away)

SilkWings

“It's not always good to know how the honey gets made.” (Don't stick your snout where it doesn't belong)

“She's got a couple of threads loose.” (Calling someone a little crazy, threads refers to weaving)

“The bee minds its flowers and the spider minds her silk, it's when they mix that bad things happen.” (Mind ya business)

LeafWings

“Flytraps only trap because the soil doesn't feed them.” (Dragons don't get angry out of nowhere)

“Looking like a leaf only hides you in the forest.” (Time and place)

“If a branch doesn't bend, it breaks.” (Be flexible)

“Even the corpse flower attracts the flies.” (Even someone who seems ugly to one dragon they can seem irresistible to another)

[rombastic]

I get a little frustrated with the discussion over socialization that I see in current trans discourses.

Like, I get that being called "female or male socialized" is used as a cudgel by transphobes, particularly radfems, to say that we can't Really BE our gender cause we weren't "socialized" the same. I get that there is a valid knee-jerk dismissal given how it is bandied about as some sort of litmus test for if someone is oppressed or privileged or whatever the fck other box people want to say has no nuance or needs credentials for having an opinion about.

But like, socialization is a thing. it is a thing that happens to people, and it is a useful academic term for understanding acculturation and how social norms and practices are reproduced. Male and Female socialization are things that have coherent meanings, but are context dependent and nuanced. it feels kinda like throwing the baby out with the bath water when we categorically say that socialization is "bullshit" or "not a thing" because it absolutely is.

It just Also has nothing to do with whether or not someones gender identity is "Real" or "Valid". it actually does not matter whether or not a trans man or woman or non-binary person is female or male socialized, that does not make their perspective less real and valuable or make them less their gender. It just doesn't. It's a non sequitur. If we can understand that someone who was put into one sex category is and can be a different gender...why does their socialization suddenly matter for whether or not they experience that gender?

Honestly, I think it just comes down to people reaching for logical short cuts, for ways to control and gate-keep spaces/discourses by misusing social science as a purity test. People are very obsessed with trying to find the "truest" or "most oppressed" experience that they ignore that actually every human has a unique perspective and you actually have to look at their arguments and actions not some immutable characteristic that you can somehow use to explain their entire perspective.

The problem with people who make socialization arguments are that their arguments are bad. They don't actually prove anything, because socialization can't actually prove gender identity or amount/type of oppression someone faces.

socialization is a description of a process that has no guaranteed outcomes, not a some sort of black mark on someones soul.

[mysumeow]

︵ ☆ [commission] trapped within the dream

ᓚᘏᗢ WARNINGS: Afab body reader, smidge of biting kink, unprotected piv. ᓚᘏᗢ SUMMARY: Lilia's no stranger to downplaying his pain. You won't allow it to go on for long. ᓚᘏᗢ WORD COUNT: 2.6k ᓚᘏᗢ A/N: My first commission!? OMG. I didn't realize how much I itched to write yet another one-shot with a part in which reader takes care of peepaw T_T Poor old man. Yana, let him rest! | ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎ . . . TWST MASTERLIST

The smudge of blood across his cheek, his heaved breaths despite the effort to keep an upright posture, the weariness present in his eyes…No matter how hard Lilia forced himself to play off his exhaustion and pain, the toll the dream had taken on his body was distinct. You couldn’t imagine how replaying, in vivid detail, the treacherous path he had to walk to hatch Malleus’s egg and the biting words of The Senate made him feel.

It took every ounce of effort to not run to him and give him a hug the moment he regained consciousness in his dream. Despite this being nothing more than some sort of dreamscape caused by Malleus’s magic, the experiences you went through felt real. The life-or-death situations, your meeting with the imposing Maleanor, coming face to face with a stage of Lilia’s life that was fierce yet vulnerable at the same time; it was more than a dream holding you captive.

Thus, the reason your grip on Silver’s hand faltered when Lilia insisted on you escaping without him. He’d be trapped within this spiteful phase of his timeline. Lilia could pretend, all he wanted, that this didn’t affect him—or that he had come to terms with it—you couldn’t find it in you the will to desert him.

Silver held your hand. It was time to go.

“To the person I met someday, to the person I will meet one day,” he chanted his unique magic, and you came to terms that, if you wanted to stay with Lilia, this was your cue to take action.

This was a rash decision. It didn’t, however, stop you from listening to your gut feeling.

Before he could finish the last sentence, you jerked your hand from his, your heart thrumming in your ears as you did. In a split second, you glimpsed your classmate’s panic upon realizing what had happened.

“Prefect!” Silver outstretched his hand in your direction.

It was futile. The Corridor of Dreams had dragged them inside of it.

You and Lilia looked at each other with varying degrees of bewilderment.

Malleus’s distant whisper of Lilia’s name was enough to force you out of that trance. Proper for a general, he reacted fast to stop the situation from escalating again. Words weren’t necessary to understand that it was time to flee the scene. His hand encountered your frigid one and dragged you with him.

Years of training made it easy for Lilia to dart from danger, regardless of his short stature. On your end, it was a challenge to keep up with his swiftness, diving into the complicated twists and turns of a capital you weren’t familiar with.

At some point, you stopped running. You rested your hands on the brick wall as you caught your breath, sweat dropping from your temple. In the meantime, Lilia looked for something, ignoring the obvious strain on his body.

“I don’t sense Malleus’s magic anymore,” Lilia said, panting. “I think he’s trying to figure out where Silver headed to.”

“Are we going to be okay?”

“We should be.” He wiped the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand. “Prefect, what was that about?”

No amount of beating around the bush would save you from this one. You had to acknowledge your reckless decision.

“I’m sorry, Lilia, but after seeing everything that unfolded before my eyes, I just—” Your throat was dry, the weight of the situation heavy on your heart. “I couldn’t abandon you.”

He blinked twice, processing what you admitted.

“Oh, dear. You put yourself at risk for lil’ old me? If I hadn’t been certain I could handle this on my own, I wouldn’t have urged you to bolt out of this dream.”

Anger didn’t bubble up inside Lilia at your confession. How could he? Guilt did claw its way in. He was your senior; of course he would prioritize your safety.

“We witnessed those countless days you spent pursuing a way to hatch Malleus’s egg and how none of that mattered to The Senate.” It was impossible for you to not mutter their name between gritted teeth. “Seeing them berate you and treat you like you were nothing other than mud beneath their shoes…It was infuriating.”

Lilia wiped the tears that welled in your eyes, not allowing them to fall. His eyes found yours, with his hands firm on your shoulders.

“It’s been hundreds of years since that happened. It doesn’t matter anymore. I stopped caring about them the moment I held Malleus in my arms,” he whispered. “Come on now, it’s okay. If anything, this experience was more demanding for you than for me.”

Fed up with him trying to play off his pain, you didn’t stop yourself from throwing your arms around him. Lilia’s body became tense when you did, but he eased into your arms as seconds ticked by. He was slender, with just enough developed muscle to carry on with his duties as a general. You basked in his warmth, ignoring the slight discomfort of the beads adorning the side of his armor.

“For real, though. I wouldn’t put it past my general self to put you youngsters under a lot of stress,” he chuckled, his hands patting your back.

“Stop downplaying your feelings, Lilia.” It was your turn to grip his shoulders and retain eye contact despite the burn in your eyes. Even if taken aback, he listened. “I understand if you say it stopped bothering you years ago, but the baggage is still there. You’re not a dirty bat like those imbeciles said, and you were crucial in Malleus’s life.”

“I—”

“No, you’re going to listen.” You encased his cheeks with your palms. A glint of amusement ignited in his magenta irises, but he didn’t decline your sentiment. “You had reasons aplenty to turn down the request to hatch Malleus. But not only did you travel far and wide for its sake—you didn’t abandon him even after completing your pursuit. That’s proof of how nearsighted that Senate was. You’re so much more than the mud they wanted you to feel like. I could keep going on why they’re wrong.”

“You got your point across.” You could tell your heartfelt words affected him in a positive way. His gaze softened with gratitude. “Those ten years I spent in solitude, refusing to step near the castle, I came to the realization that I didn’t have the heart to turn my back to Malleus for any longer. Prefect…”

The sincere emotion with which he spoke forced you into noting your positions. There was a smidge of space between your bodies, and in the meantime you grasped his face, your faces were close enough for anyone to assume this was a couple’s intimate bit.

“Thank you. I’ll remember your words.” The appreciative expression morphed into his usual amused one. “You can stop squishing my cheeks now.”

Your face heated up.

“You’re very cute.” He laughed at the embarrassed way you tried to step away, apologizing for not heeding how hard you clasped your hands around his cheeks. “If I didn’t know any better, I would think you’re trying to win my heart.”

It wasn’t the main reason…Although it was one of the reasons why you did this in the first place.

Lilia didn’t allow you to relax. He hugged your waist and pulled you closer to him.

“I’m going to use teleportation magic, so you better hold on tight this time,” he teased.

“Okay!”

You stuck to him and shut your eyes close.

You didn’t feel more than a weird shift in your surroundings.

“We’re here. You’re adamant on looking after me, but you’re weary yourself too.” He let go of you to open the door to his cottage. “I must warn you…I left in a haste, and it’s quite messy inside.”

“As long as there’s somewhere I can plop myself on, I don’t care.”

You stepped inside, and the first thing your eyes landed on was clothes thrown on the backrest of the chairs and piles of letters on the little hall table by the door. You had been in Lilia’s room in NRC, and it was in a state of disarray like it.

The sound of Lilia undoing the innumerable number of belts in his armor cut your thoughts short. He unbuckled the ones wrapped around his arms, followed by the one around his hips. There was some domesticity about being alone at home with him, seeing him get comfortable. Would he take off his ponytail and allow his hair to cascade down his back? You wouldn’t handle that. You registered other sounds coming from him, which you, at first, ignore.

“—lie down?”

“Ah.” You regained your senses. You focused on him. “Sorry, what was that?”

“Hehe.” Lilia didn’t bother hiding the fact he was entertained by your reaction. “I said that I’m going to tidy up the place a bit so you can lie down.”

Lilia inclined forward to reach the belt around his leg. A sting stopped him midway. His pained vocalization prompted you to hurry to his side to check if he was okay.

“Oh, I guess Malleus’s magic did land on me after all.” Lilia’s eyebrows went up as you push the fabric up to reveal his abdomen. “No need to fuss over me. I’ve endured worse.”

“You don’t happen to have a first aid kit, do you?”

“Mm, nope. I used to let stuff heal on its own with time or seek help from fairies to heal.”

You didn’t waste any more time and made your way to his kitchen, finding a cloth to dampen it with water. This would make do for the time being. It was important to clean the filth surrounding the cut.

You dabbed the cloth around the wound. It wasn’t deep to the point it would need stitches, but you wanted to give a hand.

Lilia wasn’t used to being on the receiving end of getting taken care of. That didn’t stop his chest from warming at the sight of you tending to his wounds. This was a mere hitch; he could take care of it himself, yet it felt…nice, for a change.

With extra caution, you wiped the blood on his cheek off. It had been bothering you ever since you spotted it in the capital.

Given the proximity, you were aware of Lilia’s undisturbed observation on your face. You couldn’t ignore it any longer. Every thought and feeling urged you to confront these sentiments.

“I can’t remember the last time anyone tended to my wounds.” His lips curled into a smile that, if you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought it was innocent. “What are you trying to do? Is there something you are expecting from me?”

His fingers enclosed around your awaiting hand by his cheek.

“All I want is to comfort you.”

“Comfort me?” He repeated, expecting every other answer but that one. The sincerity with which you replied fueled a need to toy with you a peg. “I see.”

His gloved hand grazed your cheek, mirroring the tenderness you wiped the blood off from his face.

“What a thoughtful creature you are,” he whispered, a thumb placed under your bottom lip. “I should reward you.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat when he tipped forward, your lips an inch from his. A tickling sensation fluttered in your body, and you closed your eyes.

Softness landed on the very corner of your mouth.

“What is it? Were you anticipating more to happen?”

That cheeky bastard.

Sensing your oncoming disappointment, Lilia feathered a kiss on your lips. Another one. On your cheek again. He didn’t pull away like the first ones. The kisses trailed south. They tickled your neck, your pulse point, your collarbones.

Your soft laughter from the tickling escaped you, regardless of your efforts. The mood was playful with him to the point you left your guard down, and by the time you took note that Lilia had backed you towards the couch, it was late. It didn’t take him much effort to nudge you to lie on it and get comfortable on top of you.

“A good general never forgets the arts of stealth,” Lilia reveled in your surprise.

“I won’t let you get away with something like that again.”

“We’ll see about that.”  

The feather-like kisses didn’t come back—these were with the intention to steal your breath. You squirmed under him, fighting to breathe in between each ravenous kiss. He maintained your hands in place at each side of your head, his hips flush against yours. With each roll, it provided the friction you needed, the temperature in your body skyrocketing.  Wrapping your legs around his hips came like second nature, and in face of your lust in crescendo, Lilia delivered you the pleasure you sought.

Lilia helps you discard your clothes; you made work of his in no time.

Then, proceeded to squeeze your sides lovingly, nosing at your neck.

“Eek!” You jolted.

Lilia had dug his fangs into you when you least expected it.

Your response made him chuckle, which didn’t deter him from leaving a new mark on your collarbone. You wanted to be mad at him for surprising you, but the feeling of his fingers trailing in the direction of your cunt made you forget about it. A shiver raked your spine when his fingers slipped inside, the way he curled them stroked the right places.

Your hold around him tightened, panting against his skin as he fingered you slowly, savoring you.

Savor you in more than one sense. Those deft fingers abandoned you in favor of his mouth, licking them clean. His half-lidded eyes locked with yours, not shying from the provocative look he sent you.

“I think you need more preparation,” he teased. The slick trickling your inner thighs was proof of the contrary, and he knew it.

“I don’t,” you huffed in result to his obvious attempt to taunt you. You tensed your legs around him, guiding him where you wanted him to be. The head of his cock prodded your hole when you did, and Lilia gripped the base to inch inside.

A sigh made its way past his lips, testing the waters with steady forward and backward movements. You, however, couldn’t unglue your sight from the scars littered across his chest, to which you didn’t hesitate to bring him closer to kiss them. When you did, you earned a gasp from him, taken aback by your affection.

“Hehe, aren’t you a cheeky one, too?” Lilia’s face became flushed.

“I’m not done.”

No single scar left unkissed, at least the ones you could reach. The tenderness of your actions further kindled Lilia’s desire, speeding his thrusts. Your body knocked back and forth from the strength of those restless hips, awarded to his sighs and groans of pleasure right next to your ear. Although in a faint manner, you registered his hands abandoning your hips in favor enveloping his arms around your waist, using the newfound position to latch you in place and take him.

Faster than you expected, your orgasm wrecked every fiber of your body—snatching every thought and you couldn’t do anything else other than tangle your hand in Lilia’s disheveled hair. At your tug, Lilia gave an appreciative grunt, followed by his own climax forcing him to a stop.

A quiet Lilia was a rare occurrence. Albeit this uncharacteristic silence was pleasant. Returning to his playful nature, Lilia feathered your shoulders with kisses, and you couldn’t hold from smiling.

Said smile dropped when his fingers sought a certain spot…

“Lilia—” you managed to blurt out. Lilia tilted his head in question. “You must be tired. Don’t you want to rest?”

“Me? Rest? This dream has provided me with the vitality I have lost,” his thumb circled your clit. “I’ve never felt this energized before, and I intend to take advantage of it.”

[obscurevideogames]

Tumblr’s Core Prodct Stratgy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on trying to keep our sinking ship afloat for as long as possible. This means desperately trying to copy every new fly-by-night social media app that some multi-billionaire sh*t out during their daily Peloton routine. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. If you find the things we say here worrisome, please understand that is our exact intention. You've outgrown our target demographic. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

The Diagnosis

It's lookin' pretty bad y'all!

After somehow losing hundreds of thousands of users during the great pr0n purge of 2018, we started to wonder if anything could be done to get back to where we were. We even brought in a management consultant who charged us a ridiculous amount of money. It would make you sick if you knew how much, but we got a few nice meals out of it at least. Anyhow, we handed this guy the app, and HE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! It was f*cking hilarious! But suddenly it all clicked -- our users are a bunch of stupid idiots who can't even do basic arithmetic. I mean, they spend all day looking at their phones, so what do you expect?

Tumblr’s best feature is its unique content and vibrant communities. But who cares, right? We're just as happy getting traffic from people sh*t-posting memes, vague-booking, giving out-of-context hot takes to news events, and spewing whatever random thought is in their head at the moment. Plus that stuff doesn't p*ss off Apple.

To keep this thing going we need new people. And by "people" we mean teenagers, like we used to have back in the good ol' days. Unfortunately we're all in our 40s now, so we have no idea what they want. But teenagers are so cool! Imagine if they talked to us like we're one of them? We're getting hard just thinking about it.

Our Guidng Principls

To make Tumblr cool again, we must address these huge glaring issues.

People can look at a blog without logging in. How is that fair to all the poor schlubs who had to fill out forms to get an account? Also we haven't figured out a way to force ads onto the personalized pages yet. But we swear that's not the main reason.

People can see content they are looking for or linked to. People can keep up with blogs they follow. But the problem with this is, people don't know what they want. We know what they want! We're smart. We wrote this damn site, remember?

Promote posts that incite pointless conversations. Posts that are guaranteed to bait every troll into responding. Isn't that why all your Magat relatives love Facebook so much? We can do that!

P*ss off your content creators in every way possible (see #2).

Create algorithms that throw an unending barrage of irrelevant content in your face. Have you seen Instagram lately? We could do that so easy!!!

The app is slow. The website is slow. Obviously this is because of GIFs. Facebook and Instagram don't allow them, so why should we?

Conclusion

Our mission changes on a day-to-day basis. Right now we're super jealous of all the attention that new Threads thing is getting. We're still not sure what it is, but we're gonna download it after work.