#we still talk about bad things or critize if there is something to critize or point things out that are not okay

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

Always funny when some Russidiots and vatniks think they can lecture me about a certain topic / Zelenskyy /... with fake news, Russian propaganda and / or only the "facts" that serve their purpose and view.

Yeah, sweet, guys.

Fuck off.

For more than a year I'm doing (intense) research. (Not to mention I knew about Ukraine before February 2022.) Try to fool someone else.

[energ00n]

Ok, making this clear now, this isn't an ask, but a message to those who keep bothering energ00n here. Some of yall are tripping hard or just are being plain ignorant or just being hateful cause y'all can never be happy & never touch grass for some reason.

That last post about Jazz being black and accusing energ00n here for being...idk, stereotypical or racist, is just plain stupid. Was there any racists moments they did or made? No. Was there any stereotypes? No. Was there any indication that he's a black man in all this and not a giant fucking robot in any sort of context whatsoever??? No! If anything, they're just treating Jazz like Jazz and in character in their own way, just cause they don't know the entire expansion of Transformers does not mean they are painting Jazz or any of character in a bad light. Like, for God's sake, I'm black, you wanna come at them with that shit then you better be ready to deal with my ass.

Secondly, those who are being ignorant or being downright annoying by saying this is bad, this awful, repeatedly asking questions just cause your ass doesn't wanna scroll down and read, then you might as well leave. Energ00n has answered the questions someone else beat you to, it's not that hard to read and scroll down. Plus, if your upset over a fan creation then this isn't the space for you, and who the hell takes the time & day to diss on a fan creation where nothing legitimately bad has happened. There is no proshipping, no racism, no hateful content, no misinterpreting anyone, none of that. Just a person who loves Transformers and wanted to share a really amazing AU with the world.

So please, leave energ00n alone and let them do their thing. They have made it clear multiple times, they're not an asshole for having boundaries, they're not a bad person and haven't done anything wrong. Get a life and go join a different fandom if you feel the need to critize someone for doing something they enjoy. Seriously, go after people who are problematic instead of waisting your time trying to justify an argument that never existed to begin with.

(Again, I'm sorry, just had to get it off my chest)

You're too kind to me!!

I've have a few black folks saying that my portrayal of Jazz is fine and it really warms my heart. I feel troubled that you guys even had to defend me because this is the most nothing burger situation ever. My Jazz was largely inspired by his character in Transformers: Exodus the TFP prequel novel, quotes and all. If I put any trope into Jazz, it's the Kdrama, anime, cliche love triangle trope, I have noooo clue what anon was talking about.

I'd like to note that you guys don't have to worry for me!!! I'll still get hotheaded at repetitive or weird asks but it's still entertaining to me than legit anger. If I really get stressed from asks or hate, I'll just shut off anon asks. I know how to handle myself, just want you guys to join in on the laugh whenever we get some weird asks lol

[flower-boi16]

Why The "Their Both Meant to Be in the Wrong!" defense doesn't work

Lately I've commonly seen this defence levidied towards the show's writing of Stolitz everytime someone critizes season 2's handling of it, and in light of the recent episode I feel the need to cover it. So let's go over why this defence simply doesn't work, shall we?

1. Their mistakes are not equal

I already made a post about this before so I'll try to keep it brief; Stolas and Blitz's mistakes here aren't equal and the show can't act like they are. Stolas mistake was sexually abusing Blitz, trapping him in a situation where he has to agree to sleep with him or he'll lose the thing he needs for his job

Blitz' mistakes are...

Being kind of an ass to Stolas in Apology Tour

Not realizing that Stolas has genuine love for him due to being blinded by preconcieved notions he's had about him

Let's break these down, shall we?

This not on the same level as what Stolas was doing

Blitz isn't even in the wrong for this. Again I talked about this before in my post about Viv's tweet but. Blitz is not in the wrong here for not believing that Stolas loves him, after all, what reason does he even have? Stolas has done nothing but sexually abuse and constantly belittle Blitz, and even those "nice things" aren't suddenely enough to balance out those bad actions, they are far too small to actually make up for the shit Stolas did to Blitz.

None of these mistakes are remotely the same level as what Stolas did to Blitz especially when you start putting in context here. Stolas was doing what he was doing to Blitz were all purely for his own selfish pleasure while Blitz' actions were more understandable once you look at things from his perspective.

You can't pretend that Blitz and Stolas' actions are somehow the same level when they simply are not. The actions from both characters should be equally as bad when you put in the context, but here it simply isn't.

2. Stolas' mistakes are never acknowledged

I've seen a lot of people trying to say that one of Stolas' mistakes here is that he "isn't self-aware enough" to realize how he treated Blitz not as a why to excuse him but to try and deny the argument that the show is victimizing him. There are two problems with this;

There isn't any actual indication of this being case within the show, this was just something that Viv made up in a tweet she posted after the full moon aired and everyone suddenely started parrotting it around. This was suppoused to be character trait for Stolas than that should have been made more clear from the narrative.

Let's say for a sec that the narrative does make it clear that Stolas has little self-awarness; well, it still fails because the show never calls this out. The show never calls out Stolas' lack of self-awarness in these scenes, if the show really was trying to hold them both accountable then Stolas' flaws here should be properly addressed by the narrative, but they aren't. It's a similar issue to Charlie from HB's sister show; the narrative is aware of the flaws the character has but it never chooses to call out or confront these flaws because it's too busy idealizing/babying the character to do that. Stolas' flaws SHOULD be addressed by the narrative if Viv really is trying to make them both flawed, but no, only Blitz flaws are acknowledged while Stolas' aren't.

That's bad writting. 90% of the blame is put on Blitz while Stolas is solely painted as someone hurt by Blitz' actions. The only time where Stolas' actions are seen as bad is when he was SA Blitz, which is good but...since it's coming alongside moments that demonize Blitz for not seeing that Stolas loves him, it runs hollow and still comes across and victimizing Stolas here as someone hurt by Blitz in spite of holding him accountable (and also because, once again, Blitz is not in the wrong for thinking this even if he has biases). The show is still directly demonizing Blitz for being hurt by Stolas' actions here, so it runs hollow.

3. Blitz still gets all the blame

People constantly complain about antis "picking sides" when you aren't suppoused to, but I don't think you can blame people for doing that when the show itself is picking sides. The show puts all the blame onto Blitz here, painting him as the one mostly in the wrong here and an asshole for hurting Stolas' feelings.

Despite what fans try to argue, the framming of the show makes Stolitz look completely black and white; Blitz is the asshole who hurt poor Stolas' feelings and Stolas is the one who maybe made some mistakes but is mostly innocent here guys! I'm really sick of people trying to argue about this being a grey reletionship when it's not, if Viv wants it to be a grey reletionship then she's doing a shit tier job at it due to the framming of the show.

Blitz is the one who the show mostly demonizes here, he's the one who the show sees as the worst person here who needs to change, while Stolas is painted as the "bigger" person. That's not mutual toxicity. If that was what the show was aiming for then the show would call them both out on their bullshit, but it doesn't.

Conclusion

Just wanted to write this quick post because I was sick of seeing this defense over and over again when it came to this reletionship. Guys, Stolitz is suppoused to be a mutually toxic reletionship, then the show's framming is fumbling it significantly. The writting for the reletionship here is just plain bad.

[ganondoodle]

not sure if i have talked about this before but i also really hate how gorons are treated in totk

they are one of my fav and i know they are unpopular and were always kinda slot into the "big fat stupid rock people" role, but i do think totk is one of or the worst case yet; all regions get some life threatening event (ignoring how stupid it is to put the issues you need to solve in the exact same spots as in botw with most changes being also reversible so the actual changes to the environment of the map are largely some small rocks sprinkled about) and they get .. drugs (haha)

like i dont wanna downplay anything but their problem being that they are obsessed with eating (>_>) some drugged rock that makes them mean and lazy (even if the reason is fine ... if i remember right and didnt make up that they had to dig elsewhere for food bc of death mountain losing its lava flow, the execution is my problem -like the vast majority of this game is a ok to great idea with passable to horrible execution of it) and arent even a danger to you (which i thought at first when you approach goronia the normal path and two gorons start to walk towards you if you come near saying creepy shit- i thought they are gonna attack me or lure me into a trap but again .. only to find them wanting me to pay to be let through (i think??) and all other drugged ones are largely just ... eating or lying around ........

like it would have been cool if that drugged rock stuff made them actually agressive, like the friendly easy going rock people being turned into something akin to a starved animal after eating poison bc they were at risk of starving sounds alot more .. impactful and scary (even if it would still be about food, which idk about you but the only kind of fatter npcs, even if non human, being made all about food is .. hm, aside from other possibly bad implications from this, but im trying to roll with the idea of it)

and then poor yuno being put in a stupid (stereotypical?) wrestler outfit and hes LITERALLY being mindcontrolled is so ...... ugh (again, idea is ok but- you get it) and then him being told by two CHILDREN that that obviously not zelda might not be zelda and it not only being the only time that idea is openly said until its "revealed" that hhhwhat?? it was a fake one?? in the mid battle of the "story" and he doesnt even believe it (both bc haha hes stupid and cant understand such a thing and also link not being able to tell anyone ... even his friends ....... ) is just so disrespectful, its ok not to be the smartest guy in the room (tho in totk pretty much anyone is made so much dumber for no reason...) but it being so clearly the gorons that get treated like this just annoys me so much, you know no one of the other races would be treated like that

(not to reach a little but it also plays into how koga is portrayed, like i love him to death and there are things that largely the gameplay only implies of him not being that incompetent, but hes clearly meant to be laughing material, the boss of the band of 'evil' assassins being lazy, incompetent and 'childish' is funny right?? and although i hc that the either super thin or super beefed up appearance of yiga members are just an appearance like their disguises of normal people to seem more unified and less indentifyable- that is still only a hc and then koga being the only character that is visibly fatter (aside from ... the gorons and .. king dorephan??) it puts a pebble more onto the pile of pebbles of little annoyances)

also yuno saying, post mid "story" battle, that no one actually knows anything about ganondorf aside from him being evil and it going complete ingored and never mentioned again feels like the type of thing a games does when they are critized for soemthing and instead of changing it they put a line in the game essentially saying "yeah we know but we are not gonna do aynthing about it lol" (like thinking of the line ashe from league of legends, whos design has been critized alot bc shes running around in a stupid tiny dress in the snow lands of their world, got when her dialog was updated that made her say sth like "yes im wearing a little dress in the forever winter land, deal with it lol" which perhaps was supposed to be a joke but it just feels like a "lol we know, fuck you")

[the-catmans-offical-2]

Tangent 2 time yippie!!

A Wrath merch (This is a pic of @fma-merchandise 's 2004 Bandai Wrath keychain that I made into a transparent image!) This is probably the only physical Wrath merch that isn't a pin, card, poster, or cloth - this is the only "figure" of sorts. And I'm not talking about it bc I hate it, I actually love it and desperately NEED one.

But I'm confused. Why does his tag have a large question mark, is he not considered a homunculus? I mean, it would make sense for him not to, considering he can do alchemy (Meaning he'd have a soul or at least part of one - I theorize that Ed's limbs contain part of his own soul and since Wrath has them that he has part of Ed's soul.), he takes a while to regenerate even though he eats the same red stones Lust, Envy, and the other homunculi eat, and he has his original remains part of his body!

Before I get critized for my thoughts or whatever, because Wrath is still apart of the homunculi group - Lust and Envy both only have the ouroboros as their marking on their tags in this line of merch!! And you can't tell me that it's because the design is Wrath before remembering, BECAUSE IT SAYS THE NAME WRATH RIGHT THERE!!!!! :(

He's obviously a homunculus, I know. But maybe he's considered a lesser homunculus due to his traits? I mean, it could make sense from what little we are shown of how he's treated by Dante and the other homunculi - I will never forget how terrified he and Gluttony looked when Dante arrived with Rosé in ep 44.

LOOK HE'S FUCKING TERRIFIED OF HER.

I think Sloth and Lust get treated horribly tbh, don't get me wrong - they're the worst treated because of how Dante views them ; But I think all the homunculi get it bad (save for Pride, and since Sloth is "obedient" she doesn't get as much rough treatment as.. Say, Wrath, Gluttony, and Lust.). And since I'm focusing on Wrath currently, just. He gets it really bad, along with Gluttony.

But maybe part of the reason is because he's different from the other homunculi - in a sense "more human" since he has a human's arm and leg that allow him to do things homunculi can't; Dante already tries to tell him that Sloth can't be his mother since homunculi don't have anyone in a maternal nor paternal sense (Something she might of drilled into Envy, which is why they call her their master rather than mother or something of that equivalent - the same for not calling Hoenhiem their father; WHICH they did do in ep 51, but that was only after changing their form to Ed.), she tries to dehumanize all the homunculi a lot.

I lost the rest I was gonna say, fuck. My point is that Wrath 03 is silly and I will make sure y'all don't forget him.

[chibiplumbobs]

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Chapter Three: Secret Admirer

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Tyler noticed Cheyanne leave out the club by herself with a worried expression on her face, and he followed behind her to make sure she was okay.

The night air was chilly as he secured the thick black hoodie around his body. He frowned when he noticed Cheyanne wasn't dressed for the cold. He worried for her health, and didn't want her sick.

"Hey Chey, you good?" he asked, giving warning as he approached her. He didn't want to startle her.

Cheyanne looked up, relieved to see it was a friend, "Just a little stressed out...is it that obvious?"

Tyler chuckled, taking the empty spot on the bench next to her, "Just a little bit...but I mean, if you want to talk, I'm here."

The offer made Cheyanne feel a little better. Trying to talk to Keyosha went nowhere, and she needed to vent.

Sighing, she replied, "I thought this being on my own thing wasn't going to be this much of a pain. Ever felt like you did everything right just to end up wrong?"

He looked down for a moment, "Yeah...all the time..."

"My parents always forced me into different things like sports and science, but music was what I loved, but being a rock musician wasn't something they approved of."

Cheyanne frowned at the story, "What did you do? I mean...with them?"

Tyler shrugged, "We don't really talk much. My brothers still reach out, but I haven't been back to Mt. Komorebi in 4 years."

"Tyler, that's awful," Cheyanne said. She never knew this story about Tyler and it was making her feel bad.

He offered a soft smile of reassurance, "It's okay Chey. You can't expect everyone to want your happiness."

Cheyanne thought about everything for a second. Yes she had problems with her family the way any normal child would. but she didn't want things to possibly get that far.

"I just don't want things to end bad between me and my family. I feel like if I fail, then it will give them another reason to critize me."

Tyler gave her a stern look, "Respectfully, fuck what they feel."

Cheyanne laughed which only made Tyler warm inside. He was happy to know he could contribute to her smile through her stress.

He continued, "You're one of the dopest women I know, and I know you'll succeed in whatever you do."

Cheyanne's grin covered her face as she smiled ear to ear. Leaning in she hugged Tyler for a second before pulling back and looking at him, "I swear Tyler. you have no idea just how much I appreciate your soul..."

Stay Tuned For The Next Chapter Coming Soon...

[eyelinerpal]

I gotta talk about this more because I'm seeing even more posts about how "The Substance is sexist it reinforces that older women are disposable" or "The Substance is sexualizing women it's just the male gaze" and like we don't all have to have the same takeaway from a movie things aren't totally black and white and the movie wasn't perfect but it's just like... did you watch Breaking Bad and think the message was "selling meth is cool"?

Depicting something =/= endorsing it. Society *does* view older women as disposable, and The Substance showed that reality and then showed the harm it causes. Elizabeth seemed fine with herself until her gross chews-with-his-mouth-open male boss tells her she's too old and needs to be replaced by someone younger and more "perfect" and then she's so obsessed with obtaining that she literally let's it kill her and it's *still* not enough.

Like we do not all need to have the same view of the movie, we don't all need to think it's feminist, there are a lot of different angles and ways to view something. But the fact that media literacy is at a point where a movie that simply *shows* older women being discarded, or women killing themselves in a futile attempt to be "enough" by society's standards is critized because having those things on screen must mean the movie is agreeing with them is...frankly kind of scary actually.

Yeah you might feel like the sexualized visuals of Sue were overdone, that's a valid way to feel, that kind of thing can evoke different reactions in different people. But personally those scenes felt uncomfortable. They were so over produced and over the top and mixed in between scenes of just gross yucky stuff it felt so...fake. and yeah she was objectified, the point was she wasn't seen/treated as a person just an object.

I just really think we need to move way way past the idea that feminist media is only "#GirlPower" and the only way to have a feminist lense is for the story to be "woman pushes back against beauty standards and sexism because she knows better." These systems exist in society and many many girls and women are indoctrinated into them. Analyzing them is also feminist. Showing them as the evil monstrous things they are is also feminist. Movies do not need to have a clear villain to have a message. There is no single villain in sexism. It's not one studio head, it's not even "men" in general. Women can and do uphold these misogynistic structures as well! Often, like Elizabeth, even at their own detriment.

People are certainly free to have differing views and not everyone has to like the things I like but I really think those kinds of reviews and complaints are so so shallow and frankly feminism will get us nowhere if we can't go beyond the surface of "this movie showed sexism its sexist" or "Men bad women good."

And like, it may also just not be your type of movie! That's totally fine, and does not mean you need to think it's harmful. It's a psychological body horror, that will never appeal to everyone.

Anyway

why is it that movies directed by women about beauty standards and/or the state of being valued as a woman only for your looks/appearances are ALWAYS criticized for “not being feminist enough” (ex. barbie, etc.)

[a-pretty-nerd]

Tomura Shigaraki x AllMight!daughter!reader

Chapter 17

Premis:

When The League of Villians discovers that AllMight has a daughter, they are quick to snatch you up and hold you hostage. Shigaraki had a careful and thought-out plan, but that was before you got there. Now you're in the mood for some not-so-healthy rebellion.

Word Count: 2,095

Warnings: Mentions of a P.L.F attack, cannon violence, mentions of smut but no smut occurs, (next chapter, I promise) Shigaraki flirting.

A/N:

So um....how was everyone's 2022? This chapter is kind of just a lead up to another smut chapter. It talks about smut occurring and again, if smut is not your thing you can skip the next one. But I hope you guys enjoy a Christmas themed thing going on. I don't usually write stuff for the holiday but this seemed fun.

Chapter 16

Progress has come to an abrupt standstill. You and a few others watched the news as it played from a comically large and expensive TV. A P.L.F affiliated group was busted the morning of Dec 24th. You watched it unfold as your teeth gently gnawed at the inside of your lip.

No one seemed too devastated by the news. Some critized their fellow members for being so careless and getting themselves caught. The members had been planning their own attack and the police were tipped off by an anonymous source. It felt weird. As a Paranormal Liberation Front memeber, you felt like you should be inclined to feel bad for the criminals. But as the news anchors read out the terrorists' plans to attack a very populated mall, your stomach turned.

Many around you joked and mocked their fellow P.L.F memebers. Not insulting their goal, but the events leading up to their capture. You thought their whole plan was ghastly. Disturbing the peace, just to make a statement. Killing indiscriminately just to prove a point, it made you sick. You were a P.L.F memeber, you fought for your freedom. Against the system that fails so many and kills more than it helps. A system that lies and cheats for the sake of control. To bring an end to the suffering, that is what you fought for. So no more little kids had to grow up like you. That is what you would die for.

Spinner sat close by and watched the TV intently. He rolled the lint he'd picked off of his sweater between his fingers as he watched. He muttered something to himself.

"What was that?" You asked, your voice tired. You'd been rudely awakened by Toga to come watch this news. You were still in your PJs. Spinner looked surprised you even heard him.

"Oh uh- Nothing I was just talking to myself." He tried to brush it off.

You turned away. Across the screen played footage of weapons the attackers were planning on using during the attack. It seems they were attempting to disguise them as Christmas presents.

"Authorities say the terrorists were planning on wearing Christmas costumes in an attempt to disguise themselves." The news anchor announced.

"That's so stupid."

"That's so stupid!"

Spinner and you spoke in unison. You couldn't help but laugh. The absurdity of it got to you. Spinner's face turned from shock to a amusement. He let out a shy chuckle. You shared this moment and then fell quiet again. The news continued until the segment changed to something a little more light-hearted. A celebrity charity event for the winter holidays.

"Y/N." Toga called from behind. Her voice was dull, but loud in your ear. Your muscles tensed. She startled you. You turned to look at her.

"Oh, hey Toga." Her eyes were pretty fixed on the TV. It took her a moment to remember why she approached you in first place. Her face was emotionless, she was very clearly tired. She looked at you and recited a line.

"Have you had anymore time to look at that file we collected lat week?" The file containing your medical history. The file filled with memories your mother worked to desperately to hide from you. It hurt to look at that report. More than you'd like to admit. You'd been avoiding it ever since Shigaraki gave it back to you. You swallowed.

"Uh, no. Not really. Why do you ask?" You turned to her, nervous butterflies flapping away in your stomach at the thought of her growing annoyed with you. Toga shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Boss man told me to ask you about it." She confessed. A confused smile tugged at your lip. You chuckled.

"Well I appreciate the honesty, but why didn't he just ask me that in person?" Toga sat herself down between you and Spinner, who was now making a point to try and act like he wasn't listening in on your conversation.

"I don't know, why don't you just go ask him yourself? He's just in his apartment."

"What? She's just supposed to stomp on over to SHIGARAKI!?" Spinner interjected.

"He has a point." You agreed.

"What? It's just Shigaraki."

"We watched our leader decimate entire cities and he's 'just Shigaraki,' to you!?" Spinner was outraged. Toga, was too tired to care. She slowly blinked at her peer before answering.

"What? Yeah we've seen him go ape shit a couple times-"

"A couple- A couple times!? Toga you are severely underplaying the role our leader has played."

"Look, I get that you're Shigaraki's personal yes man and all but he's not some overlord: ruler of all evil. He's the NERD that rounded up a bunch of lucky suckers, alright!?"

"He is a nerd." You agreed.

"Wha! He is the ruler of the new world we are working to build!" Spinner continued, his voice growing higher and higher with every contradicting addition to the conversation. Toga was relentless.

"You're just saying that because you're a nerd." Toga stonewalled.

"You are a nerd." You agreed with a smile.

"Stay out of this, Y/N!" Spinner squeaked. Your smile widened as you chuckled to yourself proudly. You lifted yourself from the couch and left the room as their bickering continued. You walked out into the large, long hallway. The building was massive, felt and looked more like a mall than a residential building. Which way to Shigaraki's apartments again?

You shuffled down the hall, hands in the pockets of your lounge wear. Why did Shigaraki send Toga to ask you something instead of just asking you himself? Seems a bit out of character for him, don't you think? Especially asking about something so, intense. You thought on this as you approached his dwelling. For a moment, you hesitated. Shigaraki doesn't like to be bothered. But then again, you've bothered him before. He doesn't seem to mind too much when you do it.

You grin to yourself at that thought. He's oh so fond of you. Especially after that night. The night you threw any sort of caution to the wind. Shigaraki hadn't said a word to you about it since. In fact, he'd been far too busy to even speak to you at all. Apart of you worried that you had crossed a line and made him upset. But then you thought about that night.

The way he kissed you. The way he moaned for you. The way he looked at you. You shuttered at the thought. Remember how eager he was to return the favor? You catch yourself before your knees can buckle out from under you.

You knock on the door. No answer. Knock again, you hear faint shuffling. Suddenly, a voice.

"Come in." Tomura grumbles from a speaker you'd neglected to notice by the door. You look up at the camera above the door, and you wave. The door before you unlocks, and you push forward into his humble abode.

Tomura's "apartments" is more similar to the kind of master suite a luxury tech hotel might have. There's a lot of furniture that is almost hilariously luxurious in comparison to how you were living with the League only a few months ago. You wondered why Shigaraki would even leave such a nice and comfortable home much less to live in an abandoned building.

You follow the sound of keyboard tapping. Down yet another hall, into a "home office." Tomura sits at a desk that is riddled with monitors. He has eyes on the security systems of the whole building. The two screens in front of him reveal him to be preoccupied by what appears to be a very intense video game match. You watch him play as you enter the room.

"Working hard, or hardly working?" You joked. Tomura scoffed.

"First you critique my plans. Now you're critiquing my down time?" His eyes didn't leave the screen.

"It's not that. It's just that Spinner told me not to bother big boss man while he's busy." You mocked. Tomura let out a soft chuckle.

"Spinners a nerd." He grumbled.

"That's what I said. I said you're both nerds- oh! Nice shot." You laughed as you watched him play. The match ended a few minutes later. Tomura sat back in his chair and finally turned to look at you. Something about him looking so relaxed made him so attractive.

"What do you want?" He grumbled. You took in a deep breath before answering.

"I wanted to know why you sent Toga to ask me about my file instead of asking me yourself."

"Well? Have you look at the file?" He tried to change the subject.

"Answer me first, please." You slouched. Tomura avoided eye contact.

"I thought you'd be more honest if it came from Toga." You didn't expect that answer.

"More honest? Do you think I'm dishonest with you, Shigaraki?"

"I didn't say that. And I told you to call me Tomura." He reminded. The memory flowed through your mind. The way he breathlessly whispered it to you.

"Then why, Tomura?" You asked again.

"I told you why." His eyes found you again. Clearly you were beginning to annoy him, but he was pacing himself. You sighed. This would go nowhere.

"I haven't looked at it again. I don't want to know anymore. I'm afraid it'll start another episode."

"But it's important." He pushed.

"It's my file. I'll read it when I'm ready." You said firmly. Tomura straightened himself and looked away again.

"I don't think you're dishonest with me." He spoke after a moment of silence. "You and Toga are close. She's your friend, right?" His eyes shot up to yours. You thought back to the first moment you met. How terrified you were of this strange girl dressed in uniform that had snatched you up in the gym bathroom. You smiled. How strange it was to call her friend, but how wonderful it felt to have a friend.

"I guess." You smiled.

"You guess?"

"I mean- yeah. She's my friend. But, you're my friend too, right Tomura?" You didn't expect that to make him blush and turn away. You felt proud. You approached the back of his chair and place your hands over his shoulders. "Companion, was it? That's what you called me?" He fell silent. His body stiff and warm. You could see the blush creep across the back of his ears.

"Do you celebrate Christmas?" He abruptly asked.

"Huh?" You asked, bewildered.

"Do you celebrate Christmas? Isn't it tomorrow or whatever?"

"Uh well, not really. My mom's not really into holidays. So usually Christmas was just a card and half-assed present from my Dad."

"I want to celebrate it. With you." He told you. Now it was your turn to blush.

"Have you ever celebrated Christmas before?" You asked him.

"No. But I want to." You smiled and leaned forward so that your chin rested on his shoulder.

"Funny, I expected you to be more of a grinch around christmas."

"Well, now I have someone to celebrate it with." He said it so matter of factly. "And I already know what I want." He stood. He watched him as he turned and starred at you with a look you'd never seen on him before. His expression was soft, but his eyes peirced through you. That look alone sent a chill down your spine. He took a step forward and you took a step back as you spoke.

"Yeah? What's that?" You tried to smile through your nerves as your back pressed against the wall. He took a deep breath before it shook out of him. He may have you against the wall, but both of you have turned into nervous messes.

"Do you remember..." the words faded in his throat. He swallowed and then tried again. "That night, on the couch?" His eyes looked down to your lips.

"Of course."

"You offered me-" He didn't know what word to use.

"I offered you?"

"You gave me...you-"

"I offered you companionship, and when we realized we couldn't I... I made up for it." His eyes darkened and a smile stretched across his face.

"You never let me return the favor." His face was so close. The itch to kiss him became intense.

"Is that what you want?"

"And more." His voice was so deep and confident. You couldn't help but smile.

"You really want that?" You asked, your hand resting on his chest. The way he relaxed at your touch was adorable.

"I want you for Christmas." He whispered in your ear.

Taglist:

@craftybean13 @babayaga67 @imjustverable @bat-eclecticwolfbouquet-love @kamenoyaki @hentaiqween101 @skzero-99 @justanotherlifeff @witch-o-memes @lolilith @anime-lover-forever-1127 @eatadickendeavor @tomura0complex @fangirlcenteral

[alexanderdragonborn]

So I'm currently finishing my story with the Dark Brotherhood. I am excited about posting the story as soon as possible. For now, I thought I should post some spoiler alert. *story is still in edit*

#

Windhelm...home of the Stormclocks. I can't wait to get out of the city as soon as possible. It seems that everyone hates my kind here.

I sighed and went to walk towards the docks. Hopefully Solstheim won't be too bad.

Then it's true, what everyone is saying? That Aventus Aretino is doing the Black Sacrament? Trying to summon the Dark Brotherhood?"

*The...the Dark Brotherhood? Did I hear that right?*

Idesa: "Oh, Grimvar... always with the nonsense. No, no, of course not. Those are just tales..."

*Mother...*

Grimvar: "Fine. Then I'll invite him out to play. He lives right there. I'm going to knock on his door..."

Idesa: "No, child! Wait! That boy, that house - they're cursed."

Grimvar: "Ha! Then I'm right. I knew it. He's trying to have somebody killed!"

Idesa: "All right. I won't deny it, child. What you heard is true. But Aventus Aretino walks a dark path. His actions can lead only to ruin. Now, enough. We will speak no more of this. I am the only friend you need."

*No...*

On second thought Miraak can wait. I can't let this kid do this.

#

Somethings wrong here." I sighed in frustration.

"What do you mean Xel?" Remi says as she sits by the fire.

"Ever since we returned to Skyrim Misara is distance towards me. In fact she's beginning to become more anxious." I replied

"So it wasn't my imagination? Do you think shes upset that she killed...well you know Grelod?"

"Probably. But did you also notice how she froze when Aventus called her an assassin? Almost like shes hiding something?"

"Well if I was called assassin and I wasn't I would probably freeze too. But I see where you're coming from. Have you talked them about it?"

*Thats a good point but I'm not sure if thats the case*

"Not yet but I am considering bringing it up. You don't think shes going to become an assassin do you?

I don't think so. She's a thief not a killer. The only time she didn't feel bad about killing was the orc in Raven Rock or bandits.

"I remember. Frankly Raven Rock is better of without him but this is different. She jumps whenever we try to get her attention" I responded.

"That sounds like a conversation you two should have soon. It sounds like she needs someone to talk to" Remi replied.

"She usually leans on Lucien but our friend is currently busy right now. I can try to talk to her if you like l? Inigo asks.

"Best that we give her space. She looks like me when I'm focused on my experiments." Remi said.

I sighed and look up at Misara. She's holding on to the necklace and rubbing it slowly. It brings her comfort when things become too much. I wish I knew what was going on. Shes uneasy about something but what?

Guilt? Maybe. Fear? She is afraid. She didn't get caught for the murder so its probably not that.

*What are you hiding Misara?*

#

"Sleep well?"

"What? Where am I? Who are you?"

"Does it matter? You're warm, dry and still very much alive. That's more to be said then for old Grelod hmm?

You know about that?

Half of Skyrim knows. Old hag gets butchered in her own orphanage. Things like that tend to get around. Oh but don't misunderstand. I'm not critizing it was a good kill. Old crone had it coming but there is a slight problem.

I don't like where this is going...I said

#

We entered into my home only to get tackeld by Kaidan?

Are you alright? Are you hurt? What happened to you. He asked

The Dark Brotherhood happened. What happened to you? I replied

They must have slipped me something. Woke up a day later with a pounding headache and you were gone. Been tracking you since. I'm so sorry.

I killed the assassin. It was the leader.

It was thier mistake to cross you. Maybe let a guard know while we're in town. I don't doubt someones looking to bring down the dark brotherhood.

"Misara!" Khash yelled as she ran towards me. I quickly picked her up and hugged her.

*They won't trust me soon* I thought. *I just know it*

#

"Xelzaz...I can't destroy them. Its a conflict of interest"

"I'm trying to understand why it is though Misara. Clearly something is holding you back. Please I want to help you but I can't if you don't tell me what it is."

"I can't tell you." I backed away from him. I can sense he's hurt

I...see. Look if you want to keep it to yourself thats fine but just know its not healthy to keep hiding this. I won't push you" he responded in a disappointed tone.

"Xelzaz if I tell you I'm worried that you'll hate me. I'm scared that it will ruin our friendship"

"It might not but what makes you think that I'll hate you?"

You really want to know? I asked

Xhu Beeko, I do" he responded. He reach out hoping to grab my arm to comfort me but I didn't let him.

*sighs* okay...well my mother left me when I was a child. I don't remember her very well."

What's that got to do with destroying the Dark Brotherhood?

Because...She was a member of the Dark Brotherhood...Astrid sent my Dad a letter. She revealed that I had a brother. My brother is part of that group." I held back a sob. I slowly back away from him. Bracing what might happen.

"Well, that's...something I wasn't expecting to hear. That does answer a few of my questions though"

*coming soon*

[natsukitakama]

Headcanon : Reader being nice to Floch even though he is jerk

Request : Well since Floch seem to be a type of guy who criticize people then how about he criticize s/o as well but instead of her getting offensive, she actually thank him for being honest since she’s a type of person who’s okay with criticism and also want the truth since some people usually don’t do it because they’ll feel bad that they know it’ll hurt people and that s/o is also a type of person who sees good on everyone including Floch even tho he seem like a jerk guy she still sees good on him and really curious in how would he react 👀

Author note : Hi there I’m sorry for taking so long, I needed some time of my own hope you’ll understand. I found your request quite interesting considering this part of his personality isn’t the most attractive. But still it’s part of who he is. Anyway hope you’ll enjoy this (to be honest I struggled to finish it lmao also yeah I'm trying a new way to present my post one day I'll be satisfied) 

Update : Because I got so much fun writing his reaction from a reader who is thanking him for his opinion while he was harsh on them. In this headcanon, they started as companion but then it would be imply that both of them are together or at least something is happening. Hope you’re fine with that. 

Warning : Cursing / Floch being a mean / mention of something that happened in season 3 but its vague 

Disclaimer :  Not because I’m writing about Floch means I understand what’s he done, I won’t accept his action but I still believe he wasn’t developed enough. I won’t accept any criticism because my anon asked for Floch or because I write for him. If you don’t like it then do not read it ♡ 

I got a headcanon that look like this so see this as the other version ♡ 

Masterlist 

The way you seemed to always accept every criticism never felt to amaze Floch. No matter who criticizes you, you’re always acting like it wasn’t a big deal. Worst he even noticed that you were glad to be critized. His first thought when he discovered that you were taking different opinion with a smile was something like « what the fuck ? » 

How could you take negative though that easily ? What was your secret ? 

For weeks he strongly believed that you were acting tough but when you were alone, you were crying over each word you’ve been hit on. 

He wouldn’t be surprised I mean, everyone hates being criticized it’s part of our nature. 

But you weren’t like this, after weeks of believing you were a liar at pretending that critics didn’t affect you, he then discovered that in fact you were taking it with serenity. 

« It would help me to be a better a person » you once said to him

He didn’t get it. Like who do you think you are ?

Why aren’t you acting like Eren or Jean ? Why weren’t you angry at him ? Worst, why weren’t you defending yourself ? What was wrong with you ? 

The fact that you were smiling everytime he was mean to you was getting on his nerve. For fuck sake could you at least yell at him ? At least he’ll know you were human. 

He didn’t why but seeing you smiling at him, thanking him for his negative opinion got his sick. He could feel his stomach twisted as if he could throw because of your sympathy. Did you pity him ? 

He even once heard a conversation between you, Eren and his crew that makes him even more sick : 

« You know, you shouldn’t let him talk to you the way he did. This isn’t respectful. » 

« Eren is right, want me to teach him some manners ? If it’s for you i’ll do it » 

«  *chuckle* Thank you Mikasa but I don’t think it would be necessary. I mean yeah he got a way to say things - » 

« He is talking to you like you were shit » 

« I wouldn’t say it like this Eren but yeah you got a point. Y/N I know you saw good in everyone but you have to admit that recently he is being mean to you » 

« *sigh* As I was trying to say, yeah he is being mean with me but his opinion was actually good. I mean yeah I’ve been too slow during our training and yes I shouldn’t forgot to pack some gas with us. My point is he was right, he just got a way to talk to people » 

« Come on everyone makes mistake and it wasn’t like HE thought about taking Gas bottle too. He got some balls to says that » 

« Eren is right Y/N. » 

« But he was still right. I mean he forgot but I forgot too, if no one is meticulous in real battle it could be dangerous. Besides he is not as mean as everyone thinks. I can see it, there is good in him »

« Well he is doing a good job at hiding it. Remembered how he talked to Armin when he woke up ? That piss of sh- » 

« *sigh* Yeah he shouldn’t say it the way he did but you need to understand his point too. He was all alone with his friends and his commander which he used to worship by the way, he had to run with his friends knowing he would die either from stone or because he’ll be eaten by a Titan. For him Erwin was a hero, of course his first reaction was to want him to survive. Caporal Levi did it too, he wanted Erwin to survive he only have the injection because Erwin told him too. » 

«  Maybe. But I still believe this man has no education » 

« *chuckle* you used to be a little shit too when you first came, acting all cocky because you were about to kill titans but everyone looked through it and now we all love our precious angry soldier » 

Eren then proceed to grumble something about not being angry while everyone was laughing. How could you say that ? Why were you protecting him ? Did he ask you to protect him ? No ? Then why are you seeing all those things at him ? Why were you saying that he got a point when all he did was telling you how shitty you were. He was bullying you why were you nice to him ? 

The worst when he started to have a crush on you. Was he a sadist or something ? Why was he looking at you everytime you were training ? Why was he offended when someone compliment you ? You’re just in love bitch

Did he stop being mean at you ? No not at all, it would be out of character for him. BUT he started to be « gentle » about the way he critices you. For example he won’t told you that you suck at being a soldier because you were starting to feel tired because of the training instead he would scold you for not sleeping enough. 

See ? He still gives you critics and some time he is a bit harsh but now you’ve noticed (even though you already did) that he was actually carrying about you. 

So you started to thank him even more for his kind word, which disgust him. Why were you thanking him anyway ? 

At some point he stopped trying to figure out if you were a masochist or just silly, he keeps scolding you everytime you did something wrong and he just shrugs each time you were thanking him. 

But then you started to defend him even more, you weren’t just trying to justify his action by analyzing his behavior. 

Now you were arguing with people who were telling some shit about him which surprised him. Why do you care ?  He didn’t give a damn about some fools’ opinion nor should you. 

But here you were explaining your point, trying to make them understand that no he wasn’t just a jerk and there were something more important to get to know. He froze. 

« Come on Y/N don’t fool yourself Floch is a jerk have you seen him ? All he cares is himself. He is so fool of himself. Did you notice the way he is talking to you ? How could you defend someone like him ? » 

« Because he cares about him and because I care about him too. You asked if I noticed the way he was talking to me, I did. He stopped being mean at me, and started to give me advice to help me during my training. He noticed my lack of stamina and told me to practice and sleep better. He scold be for always forgetting something and now I’m careful. All he need was to help me, how am I supposed to avoid fight when you’re clearly misunderstanding him. He is someone good, you just need to get to know him » 

This time instead of feeling sick, he felt a little warm running into his body especially on his face. He felt … good ? He couldn’t explain it but yeah he felt right to hear you saying this even though he still didn’t understand why you were like this while you two barely talk together. 

He wanted to confront you about. 

Especially because he started to dream about you even more than before. That scene when you were defending him was keeping playing in his head, again and again. At this point you were always on his dream. Not that he will complain but he felt silly to be like this, like to him they were no way you were into him. 

So one day when you two were cleaning the training room, Floch decided it was now or never. So after closing the door to be in « peace », he walked into your direction. Step by step he noticed that he got trouble at taking a deep breath probably because he was scared or anxious. 

When he finally was in front of you, you noticed his frown and started to ask yourself what was wrong with him. He wasn’t so anxious, usually he came talk to you all cocky to correct you but now it was as if he was talking to Caporal Levi. 

« Are you okay ? » 

« Of course I am why wouldn’t I ? » 

« I don’t know you look like tense. Did I do something wrong ? » 

« Obviously yeah. I mean you’re always doing something wrong but that’s not why I’m here » 

«  Oh yeah ? » 

« Yeah. »

« Then ? »

« Then what ? » 

« Why are you here ? If you’re not here to scold me » 

«  I wanted to know why you’re acting so nice » 

«  I’m acting nice ? » 

« Yeah don’t play dumb to me. I heard you talking with Eren and that bunch of shitty friends also I saw you with those stupid soldiers talking dirty about me. Why were you defending me ? » 

« Why not ? I mean they are not angel either so I don’t see the point of being mean » 

« But i’am » 

« Excuse me ? » 

« You said there’s no point of being mean about someone but I’m mean. Especially with you I remember correctly telling you that you being a soldier was a shame for humanity » 

« Yeah that wasn’t nice by the way » 

« See ? You’re smiling ! Why is wrong with you ? » 

« What ? Because I can’t smile ? » 

« No ! Not when I’m being mean at you that completely strange » 

« Well then I’m a weirdo I guess » 

« Okay I’m done I knew I couldn’t get anything from you » 

«  I’m sorry but I don’t see what’s wrong with my behavior ? » 

« You can’t smile when someone is saying bad things about you » 

« Why not ? You’re being honest. » 

« But it’s mean » 

« Yeah and ? At least you’re not trying to be nice with me when in fact you can’t stand me. I hate hypocrite I prefer when people are honest with me. Besides as I said before your critics were interesting it helps me getting better so I don’t see why I would be mad at me » 

«  I don’t get it I’m sorry, even if it helps you. You could at least slap me for being mean at you » 

« Do you want me to spank you Floch ? » 

«  I- I say slap me and not like this I-I oh my god I can’t » 

«  *laugh* but you’re the one talking about slapping I’m sorry I didn’t know it was your thing I’ll take it in mind » 

« YOU … Wait are you making fun of me ? » 

« Maybe ? » 

Then you just laugh and finish your duty, leaving a completely frozen Floch. 

You’re kinda broke him, he didn’t know how to behave with you anymore. 

Should he be glad because you’re not angry at him for being a jerk ? Or should he be concerned because you figure out something he didn’t want to admit ? 

Again, he started to be less a jerk around you. But you noticed that it worked only for you. Floch was still… Floch around other people. He just tends to be soft with you, he stopped scolding you and in fact correct you each time you were doing a wrong move. And when you were loosing or forgetting something, he just gave you what you needed without complaining. 

People were surprised, like they weren’t used to see Floch not acting like a jerk. They also didn’t understand why you weren’t treated like everyone else. Some of them got their theory but for now all they could notice was Floch not being as mean as usual with you while you were acting nice with him. For both of you that’s all matter 

[itscoldinwonderland]

indoctrination? ive been following you for a long time and i was an antisjw/feminist too im not anymore either. i never felt like i was indoctrinated into it.

I think that's valid but my experience is my own.

The group I associated with is the one that screamed about "facts" and "logic" and yet it definitely felt like I was just supposed to accept certain things if they were said by the right people or in the right way and I wasnt supposed to question the group of people I associated with.

There was no drive to think critically about other people's positions and how they related to their other thoughts and beliefs. That means if someone was a literal Nazi, we'd still reblog them as long as they made a "good point". Something something broken clock. - of course not everyone was like this and maybe not with Nazis, but it definitely happened and was common to see posts floating around by shit people because they said one ""good"" thing.

Radicalization. It was REALLY easy to be radicalized and I mean really. Literally the only thing preventing me from being radicalized was my marginalized identity. But every so often I felt like I was sinking a little bit deeper.

Let me explain.. I started out watching a lot of anti sjw videos, ya know you got your Blaire White and your shoeonhead and your repzion and whatever whatever.. but then it was Ben Shapiro and Prager U.. and then it was Lauren Southern and Paul Joseph Watson. Some of this I blame on youtubes algorithm.

And just in case ya don't know... Lauren Southern is a literal white nationalist no matter how much she denies it. Paul Joseph Watson on the other hand is a big conspiracy theorist who is associated with Alex Jones. I watched them VERY frequently! And I tried to convince myself that I was just interested in their veiws, ya know that I just wanted to understand but I'd get a little more okay with their bigotry everytime I watched their videos. THAT IS RADICALIZATION. WHEN THE HATRED KEEPS SOUNDING A LITTLE LESS BAD.

Then I would log on to this awful site and I'd be bombarded with the same talking points. The antisjw group was full of the far right because anything that can paint social justice as bad is good for people who don't want social justice. It was inescapable but it wasn't like self identified Nazis screaming they hate Jews, it was always framed in a digestible matter and when it wasn't it was "just a joke/meme". Because that's how radicalization works.

I always excused jokes, even if they rubbed me the wrong way. Have you ever heard of Stonetoss? Maybe not but you might have seen his comics especially if you were involved with the antisjw groups. Well he's an actual Nazi and I mean, white nationalist, Jew hating, Nazi. And yet his comics would get shared around because they'd be antisjw comics. But that's how they get you, it starts with antisjw comics and then you're see a comic that says Jews are evil. Sadly his comics still get shared around probably by unknowing people but that makes it more scary because we were unknwoing too!

I never argued with anyone on the far right about the far right and I never saw anyone do it because if they weren't us, they were at least our allies. I think a lot of antisjws would make excuses (see:broken clock) or they would outright ignore the radicals. But a lot of antisjws were centrist and moderates who wanted to find the middle ground, which ultimately turned into exusing the far right and critizing the far left.

I was young. I was 16! Some of the antisjws in my circles, especially the ones who were far right, were much older than me! That alone made it feel like it was okay. I was a kid I didn't know better.

I have a lot of thoughts about all this and so my thoughts are all over the place I'm sorry. I feel horrible for the way I use to think and the people I associated with and the things I would promote and the things I would excuse. It was unacceptable.

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

I feel you, gurl. I feel you. When I saw the pic with the face oil (before reading your words), I was also like "Zelenskyy? What?".

Which leads me to my question: You've been doing this for such a long time (and we are all very grateful that you keep doing research and posting stuff and that you do all this!).

So I wonder:

Was there something that suprised you? About doing research or about what you've learned?

Was there ever a point were you thought you're not doing more research on a topic or you choose to not post stuff or something like that.

Thought about this for a while, so sorry for the late reply.

About 1.: Yes. Mainly three things...

Considering that people always claim that Zelenskyy has a lot to hide and is oh so mysterious about stuff...you can find out basically anything very easily, if you just know where to look and what to look for. For example his business stuff: Besides the fact that the Pandora Papers are open for everyone to read, it's actually not that hard to find more informations about his other business. So, if he's trying to keep things private / mysterious / whatever, he's doing an awful job.

When it comes to reports, portraits, interviews, whatever about him pre-February 2022, I started to only believe half the things or less, without some actual proofs or stuff. The amount of times the journalists had an agenda / worked for someone else (*cough*FCPP and Russia*cough*), downright hated him and tried to portray him in a bad light, find dirt when there is no dirt or just tried to hurt and / or destroy him...is crazy. Also the amount of times were there was absolutely NO proof of stuff and they still accussed him of doing things, always sideing against him and writing articles in a way that it sounds like the article is based on facts...is also crazy. And I think that's something more people need to be aware about. The guy literally got hated by people because of simply just existing and living his life and they critized him for eeeeevery little thing. He was surrouned by sharks and it's surprising he kept going and never gave up, because holy shit...the hate is and was something else. (Btw: This also applies to several other people or topics.)

Ukrainian politics is something else and I have HUGE respect for Zelenskyy for getting into it. I thought politics in my country is bad, but after everything I've learned about Ukrainian politics...yikes. House of Cards is Teletubbies against this. Also kudos to Zelenskyy for actually managing to achieve several things and trying to change things for the better. God alone knows how many fights must have happened behind closed doors and how many talks and deals he had to do, before achiving stuff.

About 2.: Yes, I've reached that point when I started to read / find stuff about a certain topic. That was my "Aaaaaalright, respectfully no! Enough internet and research. Time for a walk, Jam."

And yes, there are things I find, but I will not post out or talk about it, out of respect and / or because I think they should not be talked about / discussed (or I don't want to do it).

[anarmorofwords]

The last anon said "he is in a bad place right now and I can't love the person he is right now" people don't see how "takes" like this can harm others who struggles with addiction and depression (because the CLS Matthew already had signs of mental ilness)? This is horrible because it can be basically translate to

"people with mental ilness and addiction are unloveble" And there are others who always dismiss feelings that Matthew showed and was vocal about like his feelings for Cordelia because people "in a bad state" can't love either. And they do this because of a shop that isn't even remottelly in danger. I hate Cassandra for being irresponsable and do a poor job writing this important issues and I hate this fandom that doesn't give a shit for people with a mental ilness and addiction.

I totally understand criticazing Matthew for his actions but say that you don't like him Because he's a drunk and depressed is so terrible...

Oh absolutely!!!

Thank you for bringing this up! I hope I'll be able to properly address everything here, because this is something that bothers me so much, but I forgot to include that. I put it under the cut bc long

It doesn't apply to all of them, but many antis/people who hate Math really push this narrative that mentally ill people are ultimately unhealthy and toxic and should have no friends or other relationships, and that's just... Not true and terribly hurtful, not just to a character, but because of the implications it gives to real people seeing such takes.

I absolutely hate when people suggest Matthew will only be loveable - to his friends, a potential love interest, or even readers - once he heals. I hate this so so much. Yes, I think romantic relationship shouldn't be a priority for him atm, but it doesn't mean he shouldn't be allowed to fall in love (especially when, other than his treatment of Alastair, which is kind of a seperate issue, and more complex, he's been nothing but respectful towards Cordelia). Not to mention other kinds of love from other people in his life - you stay with people you love through thick and thin, not ditch them the moment it's not fun anymore.

And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying his loved ones can't have boundaries or all of his behaviour should be excused because of his mental state, but people don't even take it into consideration when analysing his actions. Like, it doesn't obviously apply to all of his behaviour, but very often what he does is indeed illogical or insensitive etc., but he's in a terribly bad place, which I think should be considered, especially when we're talking about his treatment of Alastair.

Then again, when people pin all of the issues between TMT on him?! Sure, we won't blame any of them for not noticing/helping with Matthew's addiction (I'm not saying they should have been responsible for that, just pointing out that people don't expect them to and don't drag them for that), but a mentally ill teen who's drunk most of the time is a monster for neglecting his friends?

Matthew gets hate for not noticing Thomas's feelings and his interest in Alastair, but it's okay Thomas (and the others) didn't notice his depression and addiction?! Matthew gets hate for not seeing past the "kind" facade Thomas purposefully creates, but Thomas doesn't for not seeing past Matthew's "charm"? Make it make sense. This isn't to hate on Thomas, or any other Merry Thief, is just to point out how people's argumentation is very... selective

People always go on about Math's "supportive and loving environment", but what has his environment done for him? How was it supportive? Neither this family nor friends noticed his problems, not to mention did something to help with them. I think it's mostly CC's fault, again - a convenient reason to add more drama - but it doesn't change the fact that it's shitty.

One more thing that bothers me in regards to the Academy - while I don't think Matthew's behaviour was ok either - is how people brush off what he suffered because "he had friends"? Or is rich? Like babe, i thought we established that long ago: Mental illness doesn't choose people based on their circumstances, and you can't forbid people from reacting in a certain way - to bullying, to trauma etc. So saying Matthew didn't have the right to be hurt, or he "overreacted" or anything along those lines is like saying people are only allowed to suffer from mental illness on certain conditions and for certain "reasons", and that's bullshit.

I love that Alastair was able to move on and is such a compassionate and amazing person despite what he's been through, but comparing them is pointless, when they're clearly at different "stages", so to say. As I pointed out lately, Alastair's always known what he was doing wasn't alright, while Matthew, for the most part, doesn't realize. Matthew still has time to change and make up for his mistakes, but some people act as if, if Alastair's already done that, it's too late for Matthew to do that. Which is just a little bizzare to me.

Just like you said, I don't mind people critizing him, or even being antis, if that's what they wish to spend their time on, but not for being mentally ill, or "a drunk". Please.

I hope I'm making some sense here, please feel free to add more or point out if I wrote something nonsensical, thank you again for bringing this up <3

[engineer-in-space]

a simple call of the wild review that is totally professional and not way too detailed by me (February)

It's gonna be a bit of comparing to previous powerwolf albums/songs and remember everything is my own opinion. If you disagree/agree we may talk about it in a civilized way, I actually love talking to others about this shit!

But otherwise (hate, insults, etc.) you can keep your opinion somewhere where I can't see it :) Also, the album has barely been out for a day and things change with time and I may grow to like certain things more. (but there's not too much that I don't like tbh) But I hope you enjoy this metalhead-gremlin's ramblings!

Faster than the flame

I had to listen to it quite a few times before I could say anything about it. It's a powerful start into the new album, however, it is (as previously stated) powerful but didn't blow me away like the first songs on the previous albums. (Fire &forgive, Blessed &possessed, amen & attack - wait am I just now noticing a pattern here? oh my god. Anyway.) Maybe I got that personal feeling that I want it to be Fire & Forgive, which is, of course, not possible and would be boring. So i think I'm not even critizing the song but rather the order of the songs.

It feels like a typical powerwolf song; both lyrics and instrumental. Fast, heavy, something about flames and burning - awesome. The two Latin parts (I think it's called the pre-chorus? man, I have no idea and will just throw around these words because my internet connection is too bad to look this up. But if you listen, you'll know which parts I mean.) already give me goosebumps. I also really, really liked the bridge (again?? idk??) aka the "flame, flame, burning wild in heavens name" part. This was the most memorable part for me after the first time listening. Of course, the guitar arrangement throughout the whole song is just... god bless. I must say that using the word "pastor" is dangerous because my stupid brain keeps thinking Attila is singing about "pasta" again... Oh well, moving on!

Beast of Gevaudan

Man, I've been listening almost non-stop since it was released as a single! At first, my head was comparing it somewhat to army of the night but after a few times this feeling was gone and it became an awesome new idea/song. The choir and orchestra part are so well placed and support the rest of the instrumental and Attila's voice perfectly. Again, much fast, very powermetal. I've grown very fond of the guitar solo. The lyrics tell us a little about the story of the beast and I. Love. Storytelling. In. Songs. Glad matthew finally came around to put his idea out there!

This song also has a video, which left me speechless at first. I love Attila's acting so much??? And making this sort of their own story of Jesus was such a cool idea. Production is high quality as well (didn't expect anything less after The Sacrament of Sin MVs) and there were really nice shots in there. I doubt that I will get tired of this song and this video anytime soon!

Dancing with the dead

That choir stuff in the beginning, following by that awesome guitar riff already had me. I couldn't stop listening to this one either. This might be, in my opinion, the most catchy song on the whole album. The intruments are in perfect harmony with Attila's heavenly voice. The transition into the guitar solo is so damn smooth and well done. I'm having a whole crisis about how good this song is.

The lyrics are interesting too! Again, there's a story to be told. As far as I can interpret it, being introduced to some darker powers and growing to enjoy them, despite previously having lots of faith, is what's going on here. It has this slight feeling of... corruption (in a good way of course). This makes me want to go dancing (with the dead)

This one also has a video! Once again, very high quality. Every band member had their "special moments/shots" and just looked stunning. But Attila left them all behind this time. Slow dancing, in a suit, with that smirk on his lips??? Well done, my dude.

Varcolac

This one's dark and heavy. It brings me back to the good ol' times of Lupus Dei and Bible of the Beast. Just with more orchestra, choir and overall harmony. It makes me so happy that Powerwolf is using so many real life legends and figures on this album! And they did such a good job with them as well. If this song was alive, it would be a scary beast.

The typical metal elements and orchestra/choir parts are very well balanced. And the organ throughout the whole song is fitting. It supports the dark and sinister feeling of the whole thing. My favourite part may be the "And as army we bing fire..." parts! Man, I just love werewolves. Also, I think Attila's famous gibberish singing made a return in this one!

Alive or undead

Oh boy,here we go. The piano in this one is incredible. "Here we STAAAAAAND!" Goosebumps and shivers. Everything about this is so emotional andreading the lyrics while listening just makes me want to cry, ok?! T_T Powerwolf has become so flexible, exploring different ways to make music. This could have been some kind of typical powermetal song but it's not and I'm glad about it.

Even if it's a little different, they never stray to far from what makes them special. The few parts, reminding one of typical church music would not have been necessary but are appreciated! They know when to leave out the guitars and go slowly. What bothers me a little, is that it somehow feels like Attila's voice had a tiny bit more potential up to the chorus. It could've been a little bit softer? if i can put it that way. But honestly this song is raw emotion and everything still fits together. If you thought their first ballad was emotional, buckle up, this one kicked me right in the feels.

Blood for blood (Faoladh)

Powerwolf ventures again into the folk metal territory and successfully conquers it! Could be a headline of something. Anyway, this song is a very worthy successor of Incense & Iron! It just makes me happy, its melody is so light - combined with your typical Powerwolf lyrics. Perfect song to start jumping up and down! It radiates motivational energy. Just like Dancing with the dead, this song has a very smooth transition to the guitar parts.

The melody is strong but still easy enough to quickly get into it! I can barely sit still and write this aaaa. Seriously, I am just happy with this song and will go jump and headbang a while to it!

Glaubenskraft

I have returned from jumping and oh no. It's a German song. Bold of them to go all out on that Latin beginning... it works really well though! It might be because I'm German but this song hits hard. Very hard. It's not easy to make this language sound good and ( if you don't happen to know much about German) the lyrics consist of a bunch of old words and grammar you wouldn't normally use anymore. But they made it fucking work!!! The quiet verses only make the pre-chorus and chorus itself heavier and blow me away. And SOMEHOW this super epic song with (made up, at least I'm pretty sure they don't exist like that) Latin words is about.. you know what Powerwolf writes about a lot. And I LOVE that. It's so subtle and only if you read into it, you're like "wait a minute".

This song has a feeling of corruption too. But not in a good way this time. It feels evil and intimidating and - honestly, I can't get enough of it. Everyone of my neighbours will think I'm some kind of weird Christian fanatic because I WILL yell "Glaubenskraft" just as much as I yelled "Stossgebet". Worth it, tho.

Call of the wild

The song with the same title as the album! (or the other way around, whatever.) This song is just catchy from the beginning to the end. Like many other songs its fast and hard. Just how I like it. Don't take that out of context.

The lyrics and instruments go wild (haha get it), with a really neat Latin pre-chorus. It's very fun to listen to. Personally, it makes me feel like I belong to the pack. That we're strong together, that we can say fuck it once in a while and just go crazy. The chanted part near the end of the song reminds me strongly of Sanctified with dynamite (ya know "die, die dynamite" and "call, call, call of the wild") and it's really cool they pick up on old things once again. Be it intentional or not. It's a reminder that they still are who they were back then - and their music is still fucking incredible.

Simply an epic song, strong vocals, strong guitars. I really, really like the intro. Attila has to sing so many words in such little time, does he even need to breathe now and then?

Now I'm wondering what came first; the album title or the track title? Chicken or the egg?

Sermon of swords

First of all: WHAT IS THAT OMINOUS VOICE IN THE BEGINNING. Mark me down as horny and scared. Ahem.

I really like how the verse and the chorus have their own theme and melody going on and yet they're connected. The chorus is super catchy too! And just say it yourself "Sermon of swords", how cool does it sound??? The choir in the beginning is a really neat introduction into the whole song. The lyrics match the whole album, very much a soundtrack to go on a crusade to, like Raise your fist, Evangelist or Christ & Combat. Just... "AAMEEN!" Ok, I'm actually going insane here, calm down, Feb. These might be my favourite lyrics of the whole album I think?? (unless I said that somewhere else already, then i have more than one favourite.)

The whole song has a more "classical" feeling to it, not only in the Powerwolf sense but also in the Heavy Metal sense in general. BUT. Orchestra and choir are prefectly mixed, especially supporting Attila in the chorus. The guitar solo is really cool and sounds very Greywolf-y, if you know what I mean. It's just Matthew's style.

Undress to confess

The name of this song says it all. This is your friendly reminder that no matter how much they preach about Jesus or the Devil, Powerwolf should not be taken too seriously. When I first saw the title I couldn't help but chuckle a little.

The melody is pretty catchy and easy to remember, the organ and general approach reminds me of Demons are a girl's best friend. I absolutely love how the lyrics are on that thin line of somewhat poetic and ridiculous. Let me provide two examples here: "all the world we posess for desire and sin we carress" - man, this sounds pretty.

And there's also "dressed to hide the dark, and obsessed to ride him hard on the.... crucifix." Yeah, I... I don't know what I expected here. Anyway, this is how you describe church sex without actually using explicit words. (why are you booing me, i'm right)

Still really nice to listen to and have a good time!

Reverent of rats

We arrived at the last song of the album! And here we picked up on the speed and power again! The way the organ is played during the verses makes it so... sinister. Again, this piece reminds me of Lupus Dei. The verses keep the sinister feeling while the chorus picks up more... drama? An epic melody mixed with epic words make my soul ascend to heaven.

This guitar solo is also the absolute good shit. It might be my favourite from all the songs of this album?! Additionally, the drums? I don't know why but they really stand out here. Love how fast paced they are.

Aaaaand that's it! If you've read all the way through holy shit, you are actually a badass. Thank you for staying with me, my werewolf friend. Maybe we'll meet where the wild wolves have gone. But always remember: Metal is religion.

[swordbenihime]

okay idk if im requesting right because im new to tumblr but- can you write a fic where zeke falls in love with a soldier from paradis? like this is around the time he brings the cart titan there but like in hopes of getting reiner back he accidentally gets y/n? something like that?

Conflict// Zeke Yeager x Survey Corps Soldier 

Warnings:None

Words:1.4k

...

You've been waiting in this cold cell for months. The lonely and dark cell was enough to make you question your life. You were left alone, and there was no one who could save you.

There was no longer escape for you. The cold wall you leaned against caused you to tremble; you pushed the hair against your forehead with the back of your hand. Your inner conflict was enough to feel guilty. While all your comrades were dead, you were drowning in your thoughts here.

Empathy is a special talent not given to every person. Understanding others' feelings made you feel cursed.

Understanding the enemy revealed your deepest thoughts in your mind. They were no different from you. The blood that flows through your veins, the goals you have acquired; none of you were different from each other.

It would be uncomfortable to face this bitter truth. One would be happy to believe lies rather than face the truth, whereas denial would only magnify the pain.

If you could find a way to get rid of this gnawing feeling, you would. But there was no way. The truth once learned could not be forgotten again.

As you pulled your legs towards your body, you put your head between your knees. You feeled to be pulled into a black hole.

They didn't have the concepts of good and bad for you anymore. These concepts lost their meaning; they were just words. The letters you saw on the paper didn't make sense.

You calmly thought of the scene in your mind as your eyes slowly closed: the screams, the crying soldiers, the smell of blood.

You said, "I'm going to die here."

At that moment, you thought you were going to die there. You closed your eyes; you waited silently for death. But you were just so lucky. Maybe unlucky.

Perhaps death was the better option, considering what you were feeling now. Your torment was asking you to pull on your knees and cry.

As the door was opened, your gaze found the soldiers, grabbed your arm and lifted it to your feet.While not opposing them, you took your steps forward, and you knew what would happen after all.

As the  door opened, the blond man had a quick glance at you, writing something on the paper in front of him with  pen, pointing at the chair with his hand, telling you to sit down.

The silky voice that reached your ear was no longer as irritating as it was on the first day. You were used to it. You got used to it more.You were starting to understand even this man who killed everyone.

"Hello," he said as his gaze found you.His eyes wrapped around your sad face caused him to frown.

"You don't look good today."he said suddenly.

You weren't well.Your blank gaze met his face. His gray eyes were waiting for you to answer. Your lips were slowly parted.

"I've been in a cell for months.How do you expect me to look good?"

Did the expression soften for a moment or did you see it wrong? Frankly, no one knew the correct answer.

He had been questioning you for months like this. He was asking questions about everything, trying to find out everything you know. At first, other soldiers had suggested torture, but he opposed it. He said he could make you talk.

The first time you met, your gaze dropped; you didn't say a single word. As the days passed, you started small conversations. He really made you talk.

You still haven't told anything about Paradis. You were just telling each other how your days went by. You couldn't even believe you did this, but you needed to talk to someone. You had to contact a person, even if this person was Zeke Yeager.

His fingers tangled in his blond hair. It was obvious that he was thinking of something. He looked stressed and nervous, as if he was holding back not to speak.

He whispered "You're right." He leaned back as he closed the files in front of him.

"Shall we talk about Paradis?" He asked.

Your gaze drifted away from gray eyes. So it was the moment. "I refuse." You said resolutely.

Zeke continued to stare at you for a moment, shaking his head, reaching for the cigarette pack on the table.Your eyes closed involuntarily as he felt his breath on your face. It felt strange to feel him this way. The more you felt him, the more you began to understand him.

"How stubborn you are."he said to himself, and you started laughing slightly.

"What am I going to talk about? My friends who died? Or the titans that ate us alive? Or we have no difference from titans? What will I talk about, War Chief?"

"You surprised me."

You shook your head slowly as your eyes met.

"I don't understand."

He once again exhaled from his cigarette. "I thought you would say I am a murderer. I killed all your friends,ı am ruthless. You know, things like that."

"No." you said queitly,looked away from him.

Zeke was even more curious when he saw this state of mind. Your eyes suddenly widened s his fingers found your hand, and your gaze met again.

"You are a soldier. You were following orders, just like me."you whispered

The fingers on your hand were slowly away from you, you were still looking at each other in silence.

"I must know myself before critize others. I am not a  good person either. I also committed murders; killed people. The titans ı slaughtered were people,after all."

He continued to look at you in silence, picking up the files in front of him and stood up and left the room.

...

Later in the evening, you were sitting on the ground, thinking quietly. The answer you gave surprised him; you knew that. He did not expect such an answer.You could shout him, tell him he was a murderer, and you wouldn't have lied, and maybe you had the right to say that. He killed everyone you knew.

But you didn't want to say, repeating what happened made it pointless. He was a soldier, he was following orders, just like you in Stohess. You couldn't forget that moment of staring at the corpses of hundreds of civilians.

The door of the dark cell was suddenly opened, and there was no one coming at this hour, which was not a good sign.You stood up quickly; your back met the wall.

You were suddenly relieved to see the person entering. You were afraid to see someone except him. At least you were aware that he would not hurt you. Although it is unbelievable.

As you told the soldier standing at the door to go, the door was closed; you two were left alone.

“We need to talk. "He looked solemnly; it wasn't good.

"You need to give us information about Paradis. Or they want it to be executed you as soon as possible."

You stayed where you were with the words you heard. So you came to an end.

"I refuse."

You should have died already, on that battlefield; you should never have come here.With the fingers you felt on your chin, your gaze suddenly turned toward him, his face leaning towards you; your body was between the wall and his body.

"Don't be stubborn." His gray eyes were staring into your eyes; his fingers were traveliing on your cheek. You had unconsciously closed your eyes.

"I should have died on that battlefield. None of this should have happened. You shouldn't have brought me here." you whispered.Your lips were touching.

"But it happened."

It was true.He was saying truth from day one.He was accepting what he did.No denying.

"You should have killed me."

You felt his smile you felt on your lips,your fingers in his hair, your lips met.It was wrong.You felt but you kept go.Your arms wrapped around his neck.You didn't even know where was this feeling coming from.His lips found your neck,started to kiss slowly.Your body was squirmed in his arms.

"I have a thing for you."he whispered.

Your lips met him again with his confession.Because,you had a thing for him too.

You forgot everything in his arms; you just kept kiss him. You didn't care what was going to happen.As your lips parted, he gave you a quick kiss,he had straightened his messy blonde hair and loose tie.

"I'll come back soon."he said.You nodded,kissed him back.

You had no choice but to wait for him.

[larauthorized]

Marissa Cooper Analysis

Coop, as Summer calls her. Or Cosmo Girl as Seth refers to her in his comic book. The girl next door whom Ryan first met in that driveway, delivering the most iconic flirtatious pick-up line in history. Yup, we’re going to dive deeper into the one and only Marissa Cooper, the heart of the show, who’s sadly misunderstood and overlooked even in The OC fandom. (Also, because she’s not here to defend herself, but we got you, girl!)

She’s introduced as the rich girl next door, who’s waiting to be picked up by her possibly first, long time boyfriend in the driveway. Later on, we find out that she’s not just the ordinary girl next door. She’s organized and loves planning events (the fashion show was the start of many),  while it may seem like she’s only doing it for her mother’s sake, but you can tell that she really enjoys it as it becomes another way of escapism  from her dysfunctional family (other than drinking that we’ll get into that later). She does this every season that when she’s kicked off the school even for heroic reasons, that’s when everything starts spiraling out of control that she loses herself. 

Now let’s talk about Luke, Marissa’s first, long-time boyfriend who happens to be a water polo guy that Seth might or might not hold hatred for. From the first season, we get to see a glimpse of how her family, well, Julie mostly, is the kind of rich family that forces her to be and stay with Luke just because they “look good on paper”. It reminds me of Blair and Nate from Gossip Girl, another one of Josh Schwartz’s big hit show. However, Marissa doesn’t seem too happy with the rich life that she’s used to, especially when she knows that her father is possibly in deep trouble as cops keep showing up at her door. Enter Ryan. He’s an outsider, someone who’s far different than her, someone that she longed for in years. She’s intrigued, that one is hard to deny. However, when they start talking and conversing in each other as they sneak into the Model Home house, she realizes that they’re not that different, if anything, they’re similar. In a way.. But, when Cotillion comes around, she doesn’t know what to do, as Julie once again, demands that she stays with Luke just because they’re “picture perfect” (doesn’t matter if the guy cheats and whores around behind her back like the asshole he is *sigh*). And if we’re not going to blame Blair Waldorf for letting Nate cheat on her and still choose to be with him, then we’re not going to shame Marissa, either. Yes, we went there. (take that, Bustle and TheTalko!). 

Marissa’s addiction. That one is possibly one of her worst traits, that the writers loved toying around with throughout the seasons. She tends to go overboard with this one as we see on the very first episode where she steals a whole bottle of alcohol and is left on the driveway, passed-out. This is where Ryan comes in, carrying her back to the pool house, indirectly claiming as her savior *this goes both ways for each other throughout the series, by the way*. Her alcoholism isn’t just the only thing that occurs whenever her life’s on downward spiral, it’s also shown in her bedroom sometimes. When she’s on a grey area with her life emotionally, she reflects it on her bedroom, that soon leads to be a makeover project by her best friend, Summer. Summer describes this as a reason why she’s so depressed, which psychologically speaking, can be accurate. Messy rooms are sometimes interpreted as one’s life not being as organized as they expect it to be, therefore they tend to think that “if my life is out of control, then what’s the point of keeping my room clean”? This is definitely what happens to Marissa. 

Her addiction doesn’t even get too much until Season 3. Even after what happens with Ryan’s brother, we rarely see her taking a drop after, Ryan says and I quote, “You’ve been amazing,” She replies with, “I know what it feels like to have someone believes in you when no one else does.” 

 Aside from negative coping, she’s not only known for that, if you’re actually looking closely into her character and not just judging it based on the cover. She’s an avid reader, though it’s barely shown, but we see her having her nose buried in a book every once in a while. Now that I think about it, that and many other positive qualities that she has, should have been focused and explored way more. She’s organized and carries planner whenever she needs to, she’s clearly more than the girl who needed saving if only the writers see that. Cause then maybe, people won’t refer to her as a “tragic” character that the writers want us to believe *she is not*. 

She’s definitely an introvert - compared to her best friend, Summer, who’s more the life of the party. Sure, she goes to parties and surrounds herself with her so-called “friends”, but you can literally see her drinking alone in the corner while Summer is probably having a lot more fun than she is. It’s clear that she only uses party scene as a way to steal alcohol that she will probably drink later at night as a way of coping. She also seems to be uncomfortable around new people and charges her energy while she’s on her own. This is why when she’s kicked off the school and has to go to a new environment, she doesn’t fit in right away, which leads to her insecurity increasing even higher (something that she also struggles with on a daily basis). The insecurity itself is possibly rooted from maternal issues she has, we see that on the very first episode, Julie is critizing her on how she looks, how she takes the comment on a personal level. After overdosing herself in Tijuana, she’s put on Suicide Watch, and we learn that she also suffers from “possible” ED in the past, masking it something that’s not serious because she was very stressed at the time, but is it though? Now, we never really know further cause that storyline is never explored further, we also don’t know if the writers are taking it seriously or just putting heavy weight on her shoulder for fun. Either way, it really sucks for her character, especially when she had other deep trauma issues that are barely addressed throughout the series.

Her savior complex. Now now now, this one is kind of controversial, excluding the last season where the main focus is “Ryan failed to save her”, helping and saving people are actually her forte, just like Ryan - which is why they probably connect in the first place. People love to call she’s selfish and needs saving all the time, but they’re people, who don’t bother to look deeper and judge all they please, it’s sickening. First, despite how problematic it might seem, she tries to help Oliver (no matter how many times Ryan thinks she doesn’t). She sees herself in Oliver and is scared that he might go down the rabbit hole if she leaves him alone, that’s actually sweet and showcases her nurturing side. The only downside is that every guy she does this to, seems to take it the wrong way and thinks of it as more than a friendly gesture. Cause you know, it was the 2000s, boy/girl friendships aren’t as common as it is now. She even lets Ryan go to help Theresa even though she needs him as well, knowing that he literally has an affair with another girl while they are still kind of together. How she’s trying to make  Ryan’s brother feel welcome in the neighborhood, keeping him company, not realizing that Trey might turn out to be the one that truly hurt and destroy her. What makes my blood boil even more is when they call her stupid for trusting Trey, for what, really? For wanting to get to know Ryan’s family because she loves him that much, that she’s willing to go far and beyond? *shudders* Even then, she’s still not thinking of herself when that happens, that her only response when Trey confronts her is “Me?! How about Ryan?” So yeah, I’ll fight anyone who calls her selfish. My ass.  The other thing with Johnny is that, she doesn’t try to save him, she actually sees him as a friend that she can vent to about her traumatic events that happen to her in the previous season. Because, for some reason they make Ryan look and seem like a douche this season and not wanting to talk to her though he always is there for her before *probably for angst, right?*. It’s actually stupid how they twist Johnny around and make him in love with her, leaving her yet alone again, but guess that’s what they’re trying to accomplish with her character as she’s left with her addiction only during this entire thing. 

Saving guys who don’t even deserve a shred of her kindness aren’t the only thing she’s good at - remember Hailey, Kirsten’s sister, who ends up a stripper that one time and how Marissa and Ryan find her and as he’s about to give up after getting kicked out of a club, she’s still optimistic and comes up with a plan to save her? Yeah, that one true partner in crime right there. She also schemes every now and then, not that that’s ever explored deeply in the show, but it’s there. 

Now Volchok, the guy that we all want to punch (Let’s go, Ryan!). She just loses a friend (one she can talk to about traumatic events), deals with s3xual assault and having to shoot someone to save her boyfriend, that’s got to be too much on a teenager girl like her. So no, she doesn’t just do that because she “loves to date bad boys”. There she is, standing and looking around the Model Home house, reconciling of the old times between her and Ryan. She realizes that she wants to be with Ryan and is ready for it too, but she can’t seem to go over to him when the time comes, giving him the mixtape that she makes him. The situation’s reversed, she used to be the rich girl with a mansion, now there she is, barely having her own bedroom, living in a trailer park. To add to that, she’s dealing with traumatic events still, so of course she’s insecure. She thinks she’s not good enough for Ryan and giving in to Volchok is a sign of that. But she wants Ryan to be happy, hence why she chases after Sadie, practically driving the girl into his arms. Poor, poor girl deserves so much better.

Let’s take a breather and talk about her family now. Despite how dysfunctional it might seem on the outside, and how many furniture thrown in the pool, doesn’t erase the fact that she’s a family girl. Jimmy, her father, has a way of coming and going any ways he likes. She even points it out and says, “You know, I wish you’d be like a real dad,” Ouch, that hurt. But it’s true, when it comes to family, she’s looking for a tradition, something stable that she can always cling onto especially when she’s in time of need. This is why when she comes up bringing bagels to the Cohen’s house, she feels warmed and welcomed by the family. It’s the one thing she lacks of in her family. Julie, despite the crazy ways in providing for her, is actually doing a better job at being there for her than Jimmy ever does. Sure, Julie is seen more of a villain in the first season (hell, the woman sleeps with her boyfriend that she lost her virginity to, so if I were her, I’d understand if she wants to, say, take revenge and invite her mom’s sister that Julie strongly hates as part of her master plan), but by the end of Season 3, they really grow stronger as a mother-daughter relationship that we really wish to see more of if given a chance.  Despite not showing much for her and only coming for the drama, she truly cares for her sister, Kaitlin. When she’s done moping around after traumatic events, she drives away to where her sister’s boarding school is, all because she wants to help her sister with something. There she is, finally having drama-free, fun episode where we get to see her strolling around in a sexy school girl outfit, but clearly the writers never catch her a break and hate to see her happy for once. 

Marissa is always seen as beautiful on the outside, but I don’t think she ever feels it at times. Luke’s cheating, probably makes her feel insecure and her mother sleeping with him helps as well. Ryan is the only person who actually sees her. She’s his heather.

People love pointing out her flaws when it comes to her relationship with darling Ryan, but the truth is, she has always been putting him before anyone else. She saves him multiple times throughout the series, even when he’s hardly there for her in Season 3. When she follows him to Chino, she visits his house and finds out more about him as a child - discovering that he used to be in a play dressed as Snoopy (again, she’s finding more and more about him because she cares and loves him deeply). Then, he goes out there saving his brother, not knowing that who he’s dealing with, she comes just in time with a car, saving him. This happens again when he’s broken up with Lindsay, she finds him in the rain, and comforts him, no talking needed. She shot her rapist to save him by the finale. Even in Season 3, when he’s chasing trouble with Volchok going back to his old ways as she’s miles away from Newport, he seeks for her help again, she is quick to respond and be there for him right away. Something he fails to do during this season, don’t ever tell me that she never thinks of him when that’s not true. She encourages him to talk about his architecture dream when they’re both on a college trip (this is such goals!). 

With her neglectful and narcistic parents, emotionally, and Ryan’s who’s more physically, that’s why they click and their relationship works. He doesn’t trust anyone and she doesn’t encourage her bad behavior on him, but they’re both there for each other. Always. She’s his constant, just like he’s hers, she accepts him the way he is because she’s imperfect as well. She sees him as the one thing that she can rely on and that’s really sweet. They both come from dysfunctional family with their own issues in hopes to build one of their own that actually works, at least that’s what we’re all rooting for, right? 

Well, at least, in another world, we see Marissa Cooper and Ryan Atwood sailing away on a boat, travelling, and exploring the world as they should be before settling back down to their roots - Model Home House, Newport. It’s what she deserves.