#we made her a wild magic barbarian

[babsaros]

my baldurs gate adventuring party is currently 3 lesbians and a gay man to keep the peace

[avantgardechild]

I love the journey Gorgug has gone on during junior year because two years ago I played in a campaign that was set in Elmville at a community college for failed adventurers. My character, Solei, was a wild magic sorcerer who multi-classed into artificer and she was very Seamus Finnigan coded where her wild magic surges worked like Pete's in USC and she had to roll on both artificer spells/actions and sorcerer spells, so her gadgets were always blowing up or not working quite right.

Ofc, this was pre-junior year but now I can't stop thinking about how the MCAT works and the fact that we were meant to only be a bit older than the BKs, so theoretically, Solei could have gone through similar struggles as Gorgug but instead of Porter being a dick to her it was Jace. Jace who often brings up the fact that his classes are so chill because his students are all innately magical. I'm really interested in seeing how he plays into the whole Ankarna plot (I personally think he and Porter are getting their kisses in) as this would make me rethink/further develop how/why Solei got booted from Aguefort. Her original backstory was that she was booted because she almost caused their Sophomore year quest to fail and so took the blame for all that went awry and was expelled while her party was allowed to continue at Aguefort on probation. (Ofc this doesn't really make a ton of sense with how Aguefort runs but who cares).

Anyway, I just love the idea of Solei being at the community college, hearing about the Bad Kids, and hearing about their Barbarian who proved that you can successfully meld classes that others think are incompatible. Below is a headshot I drew of her and a mini I made on heroforge

She's just an absolute eyesore to look at and is usually covered in some kind of colourful magical ash/residue.

[firerose18991]

Prince! Itadori x Black femReader prt 2

Info: fluff, adventure, multi part fic

Written with black curvy/chubby readers in mind but all are welcome

Wrd cnt: 1.69k

Prt 1

As you and Yuji contemplated your impending fates a commotion was building outside the tent.

“FIRE!” A booming voice whipped through the camp.

You jumped up from the stool you sat on, the smoke was already starting to fill the air in the tent.

“Grab your shirt.” You called to him, and pulled him out by his wrist.

When you reached the outside of the white tent, now sullied from the ashen air beginning to coat all of the camp, you saw the chaos. You spotted the head nurse directing a trailer from the camp on the barren hill down into the lush forest beneath.

“Nurse! What's happening?” You ran up, Yuji in tow.

“The Barbarians! They're storming the camp!”. She ran up to take Yuji's other hand. “You need to flee and meet with your army. We can't protect you here.”

“But the camp is neutral, are they killing their own people?” Yuji resisted the nurses' pulls towards the escape route, though it mostly looked like her tugging a brick wall.

“If they have a target like you they would've lost those men anyway. Most of them are the ones you injured in your battle.” Yuji was taken aback.

Since he'd been injured only sparse battles have occurred which only lasted a few hours at most. He was the target of the Barbarians all along. With the line of succession open his territory would be vulnerable. Nevertheless he wasn't going to hide like a coward among the sick and injured. He finally had the time to put his shirt back on. It hung loosely around his muscular frame.

“Do you know where my sword and steed are being held?” He turned to you.

His kind amber eyes still held their warmth but focused on you to give an answer urgently.

“You can't possibly-” the head nurse started.

“The stables are by the edge of camp, close to the lake.” You pointed the way and he bolted off.

“(Y/N)!” the Nurse yelled at you as he ran off. “He’s in no condition-”

“If anyone is going to keep the encampment safe it will be him. Let’s focus on setting up a place for triage further in the forest. After all this everyone will need it.”

You helped usher the remaining patients down the slippery hills of the forest to a natural basin near another river outlet closer to Yuji’s kingdom. The screams of those fighting over the ashes of the old campsite echoed to where you had found yourselves. Your heart ached thinking of Yuji fighting, maybe being heavily outnumbered and you wondered if you’d done the right thing by sending him off.

You busied yourself by the end of the first day purifying drinking water and gathering ingredients for healing potions. Some of the patients had sustained burns and you had to quickly find natural remedies in a forest you had barely gotten to know. Others worked on using their magic to create temporary rock and mud huts for patients. When you’d found just about all you could make sense of in the forest’s herbs you headed back and sat on the river bank. The fight raged on even into the night. That gave you some hope the Yuji was still out there fighting. Enough to get you through the next day.

In the morning you were the first up. Catching fish in the river and pounding wild nuts and berries into edible porridge. You’d made a large fire to cook and were careful to cast a smoke concealment spell. The head nurse woke up to you using a giant stick to stir the massive amount of porridge and fish roasting on the sides. You looked like you’d thoroughly lost your mind.

But the smell drew everyone from their huts and away from their miserable night rest. Once everyone had eaten their fill patient daily care was still at the forefront. You directed your fellow nurses to plants with antiseptic properties whose leaves could be used as bandages for the time being and crafted potions with yesterday’s work. And in the night you repeated the same as the morning. You’d brought all the nurses up to speed and everyone fell into their roles once again. The battle could still be heard. When particularly devastating attacks occurred you’d see mass flocks of birds scattering overhead to escape the atrocities. But as long as it continued your people would remain.

The third day was uneventful and fatiguing for all at the camp. In their down time a lot of the nurses watched you pace back and forth working like someone had lit you on fire. The head nurse had to pry you off a tree you’d attempted to climb to get more leaves. But in your sleep deprived state you missed a foothold and fell down. She coaxed you into a mud hut to get some rest which is where you stayed even through dinner. At some point you’d managed to fall asleep and woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of crickets and fire crackling. For a moment you allowed yourself to take in the natural ambiance before you shot up from the ground. The fighting had ended.

“Oh gods.” you whispered to yourself as you clumsily pushed your fatigued body off the ground and out of the hut.

You stumbled out to the haunting forest. The battle was done but you couldn't be sure who won. Part of you nearly began to mourn Yuji until you were startled from your thoughts by the sound of sloshing mud and leaves drawing closer from the forest. You clasped your hand to your face and hid around the corner of the hut, if need be you would wake the others and try quietly to get away.

As the heavy steps grew closer you began to make out the figure of a lone man. The moonlight only illuminated him in slivers at a time. Once it brushed upon his bloodied face and you saw the pink hair peakout through dried blood you stepped out from your hiding spot.

“Yuji” you gasped, stepping toward the bush he was slowly making his way over. His head was bowed from exhaustion. It was a miracle he made it to your camp with his injuries. You caught him just as he tripped out into the basin front. A small part of you wanted to be mad at him for taking on such a foolhardy battle, the other was mad at yourself for letting him. But that was all overshadowed by the immense joy you felt from him having returned in one piece.

You looked up as you heard more zombie-like steps creeping through the forest towards you. You hugged Yuji's now sleeping form against yourself, not sure of what you could do. Soon soldiers wearing the crest of the Itadori kingdom began emerging from the forest. Each as bloodied and bruised as their prince. You finally placed yuji down gently when you saw commander Nobara stumble through with the last set of soldiers. You caught her as well and placed her down gently before going to get the other healers of your clan.

Everyone worked through the night to pull the soldiers through. With healers stretched thin the head nurse walked over to you wordlessly and handed you a wand. Something only the most recognized and talented of your clan get the honor of wielding. You quietly rejoiced as you walked over to the remaining horde of soldiers that needed attending to.

When dawn broke the streaks of blood from soldiers marching to their last salvation were illuminated. The camp was lively with those who’d only endured extreme exhaustion and doctors rushing to care for those in more critical cases. Once you took care of your most critical patients you whisked through the camp looking for Yuji, the head nurse had decided to take him under her care as he wasn’t at 100% to begin with. As you approached her tent you heard hushed voices.

“Excuse me.” You spoke softly before entering the tent. You looked around to see Yuji sitting in bed, some dried blood still stained his skin. And the head nurse brewing a pain reliever. “Sorry I just came to see how he was doing.” You were hoarse from exhaustion.

“Glad I'm not the only one who looks like hell.” He smiled, thoroughly wrapped in plant fiber bandages and propped on pillows.

“The leader of your enemy has been defeated, but some of his men still remain at this camp. It is not our place to get involved in these matters.” The head nurse spoke to both of you.

“I completely understand, I would never ask your people to compromise their values for my sake. I believe a short prison sentence after they've healed will be enough to satisfy me.” He really sounded like he'd been on the throne his whole life.

“Yes well that may take a while”

“After dealing with my own injuries I've learned to be patient.” Yuji's grin turned into a wince.

The head nurse shooed his hand that instinctively went to his injury and used her wand to lessen the pain.

“(Y/N) the medicine.” She nodded to you.

You made your way over to her work station and waved the supplementary wand that still hadn't been taken away over the pot to complete the medicine. It glowed like gold in the dingy wooden pot. You brought it over to where Yuji was fighting a coughing fit, for fear of displacing his ribs. Once he got some of the medicine down he wearily settled back into the pillows.

“Hopefully this time I leave him in your care he'll make a full recovery.” She winked and left the tent to the two of you.

<<<prev

[theworldbrewery]

Funmaxing: How to Create a Character You'll Like Playing

Part Two: Choosing Your Features

'part one: choosing a role that fits' can be found here.

Okay, so you've decided on the roles that sound fun to you and that suit your character. Now for the fun part: actually doing character creation.

Every part of character creation is made up of two basic elements: flavor and mechanics. Each of these affects the other; when people talk about the 'fantasy' of a given class, they're referring to the experience created by the synthesis of the flavor and mechanics. For instance, the 'fantasy' of the Ancestral Guardian barbarian is a character that goes into a mystical warrior state to deliver no-holds-barred beatdowns, powered by the support of their long-dead ancestors. In order for that fantasy to work, you need both the flavor of the 'mystical warrior state' and the 'support of long-dead ancestors,' and the mechanics that let this idea work out in practice -- a character needs to be able to deal sizable damage in one-on-one combat, with meaningful support mechanics from their ancestor spirits.

The trick of choosing character options that work for you is twofold: you must determine which mechanics let you engage in the roles you have selected in part one, while also checking the flavor for compatibility with your character's roleplay concept.

First, let's talk mechanics.

Understanding how to choose mechanics that you will personally enjoy is surprisingly difficult; I think it's because the flavor is doing so much heavy lifting that it's hard to see the game expectations underlying each concept, and because it takes experience to recognize how different mechanics interact. To help provide examples, I'll be using a friend's character from my prior campaign to demonstrate.

Alice is a half-orc with the guild artisan background and the wild magic sorcerer class.

How does D&D expect Alice to behave? What does she do?

As a half-orc, Alice will have a bonus to her Strength and Constitution scores, proficiency in Intimidation, an extra damage die on a melee-weapon critical hit, and an ability that lets her drop to 1 hit point instead of 0 once per day.

On its own, this doesn't tell us much. These abilities could enhance Alice's efficacy as a Tank and a Powerhouse...or they could be used to help compensate in some areas where she is weaker, like keeping a fragile Glass Cannon standing and giving her a bonus to melee attacks if she's low on spell slots.

As a guild artisan, Alice is proficient in Insight and Persuasion plus a set of artisan's tools. According to her backstory, Alice is a stonemason, so she's taking that proficiency in mason's tools. She also gains a feature that connects her to the rest of the guild, who will help her meet patrons and allies and grant her lodging when needed, as long as the guild has a presence in the local community.

Now here's a better look at the picture! Alice has skills and features that help her in social situations, mostly with personal charm and insight, so she might be good at the Cold Reader and Friendly roles. She's also connected to the guild, which could set her up for a role as an Information Broker. Her skill with mason's tools could help her detect traps or other dangers, or give her an edge on finding secret areas in a building -- so Trap-Wise and Mapper are good prospects for her role in Exploration.

As a sorcerer, Alice has access to spellcasting features, including sorcerer cantrips and first-level spells. Looking ahead, she'll gain access to sorcery points, which let her cast more spells, and at third level she'll gain Metamagic options, which let her change elements of the spells she casts. She has proficiency in some simple weapons, but no armor, and her hit die is a d6. Her spellcasting ability will be Charisma.

So here we can see Alice is going to be a spellcaster first and foremost--at least, that's the assumption the class mechanics have created, because everything about this class revolves around spellcasting. If Alice's player wants to play a weapon-based character, this is likely not the class for them. We can also see that with no armor and the smallest hit die available, the game expects that Alice will be avoiding melee combat at all costs. Instead, the class is designed to fire spells at longer distances and deal large amounts of damage, so the sorcerer class is built for a more Glass Cannon-like role.

If we take a closer look at the sorcerer spells, it doesn't seem to have many summoning-type spells, and zero spells capable of healing or ending harmful effects. Instead, the sorcerer's spells largely deal targeted or Area of Effect damage, affect the environment and enemies, and defend the sorcerer and their allies from attacks. Alice is therefore well-suited to a Glass Cannon or Battlefield Manipulation role in combat -- and since she doesn't have many abilities beyond spellcasting, she should prioritize spells that let her act effectively in battle. The metamagic options reinforce this: they let Alice deal extra damage, fire a spell across a greater range, cast an extra spell as a bonus action, and extend the duration of a spell, all of which are assets to a character in long-range combat affecting the battlefield and dealing high amounts of damage.

But what about outside of combat? Some spell options for the sorcerer are more useful outside of the battlefield, and it's wise for Alice's player to choose some of these as well. Spells like Comprehend Languages and Knock can help Alice read unfamiliar writing, eavesdrop on an enemy, and magically unlock manacles, doors, and treasure chests. Depending on if the player prefers a Trap-Wise, Looter, or Puzzle-Solver role, the player can choose spells that fit those preferences. As a sorcerer, Alice is likely to have a high Charisma score, which means she would make a great Friend or Influencer in social encounters.

At first level, Alice also gets to choose her subclass. As a wild magic sorcerer, Alice's first subclass ability is Tides of Chaos, which lets her grant herself advantage on an attack roll, ability check, or saving throw.

Because Alice can use Tides of Chaos, it makes sense for her to take on roles in the game that let her make use of her skills and saving throws, but it also would help if she took combat spells that use attack rolls instead of making the enemy make a saving throw. Why? Because her Tides of Chaos lets her give herself advantage on spell attacks. Spells like Chromatic Orb and Witch Bolt can then be more likely to hit their target. Later on, she'll gain abilities that let her affect other creatures' saving throws, so she might choose more save-based effects then.

As you can see, even though the race, background, and class/subclass features are guiding the player toward certain roles, these roles are by no means a hard and fast rule. And with each layer of customization, you can specialize your character into the roles you most enjoy. If you like the idea of playing a spellcaster, but the Glass Cannon doesn't appeal to you, you might instead choose to play a bard or a warlock, which have higher hit dice and can let you branch out into melee fighting, or choose the Clockwork Soul sorcerer subclass to access more defensive and healing-oriented spells.

The trick is to put all this into practice in reverse: if you know which roles you'd like to play, your task is to look at the classes, subclasses, and other character options that most interest you and evaluate whether or not they will help you fulfill those roles. Not everything must be of use to your favorite roles to play, and you aren't obligated to stick closely within the confines of one role in each pillar of play, either. But in general, you'll enjoy playing your character much more if you know you like using their abilities!

Lastly, you'll need to reconcile the flavor of your chosen character options with anything you already know about your character concept. Some mechanics are simple to re-flavor, like changing the source of magical abilities or changing a damage type. Others, like reflavoring spellcasting as weapon attacks, are extremely difficult verging on the impossible. If you find yourself trying to completely overhaul the flavor of a class or background, you might want to look in a different area for the mechanical features you enjoy.

If you're looking for more specific advice, feel free to send in an ask. Happy character creation!

[howlingday]

everyone has jaune as a paladin or a fighter, lets see jaune as a barb everyone is terrified of this tall tattooed wild man and they think he's kidnapped ruby... they were just talking about their hobbies why's everyone so mean to ruby's new friend? of course also give us an obligatory jaune rage moment

"There he is."

Weiss and Yang peered from their hiding place to match their view with Blake. Ahead, their abducted leader sat across the fire, trapped by the hulking beast with his eyes on her. She looked like she was about to cry. Yang-

"Wait." Blake held her hand against Yang's chest. "We can't just rush in. Ruby could get hurt."

"Not if I hurt him first." Yang growled.

"Yang, he was able to take Ruby on his own." Blake reasoned. "And with Ruby already taken hostage, we can't risk any harm coming to her."

"Or any further harm." Weiss added.

Yang was angry, but she couldn't just rush in and vent them out on the guy right in front of her. She hated it, but she didn't have a choice. So she sat and waited, watching as her sister wept in front of her.

---------------------------------------------------

"That's so sad." Ruby sniffled. "And you couldn't do anything to stop her?"

"Pyrrha was always the better fighter." Jaune sighed. "Even if I wanted to, she would've found a way to stop me from taking her place." He traced his fingers down his arm, his digits kissing the spear and shield tattoos decorating his fallen friend and lover. They seemed to glow at his tough.

"Are they... magical?" Ruby asked.

"In a way." He gently smiled. "It helps me connect with her spirit." He chuckled. "Even now, she's ready to protect me."

"Can... Can I touch them?" He nodded, and she carefully approached him. He may have seemed gentle and kind now, but his earlier abduction of her made their friendship a little tenuous. He held out his arm, and she drew close, tracing her delicate fingers as he did. There was a magic in these arms, and the catalyst for their power were these tattoos. "Why did you abduct me?"

"Because I know you were there." Jaune answered. "And I didn't want a friend of Pyrrha to meet the same fate as she did."

"What do you- Whoa!" Ruby fell backwards, slipping in the mud. Jaune caught her arm, and she winced. "Ow!"

"Oh, sorry," Jaune said as he reached a hand out to steady her, "are you oka-"

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SISTER!" Ruby fell on her back as a familiar voice signaled an explosion in front of her. Yang threw a bomb at Jaune's face, likely hoping it would ony slightly injure her and fatally wound Jaune for some protective reason.

"Yang, don't-!"

The blonde bombshell rushed into the taller blond, swinging a hard fist into his face for good measure. Enraged, her eyes glowed red as she continued to strike her foe, unarmed save for the gauntlets covering her fists. There was a thundering crack, signaling that bone was broken.

"Ruby, are you okay?" Blake asked as she kneeled next to her leader.

"I'm fine," Ruby stood up, "but you guys need to stop attacking! Jaune's not our enemy!"

"Who's Jaune?" Weiss asked.

A scream pierced the air, drawing attention back to the mentioned barbarian. Holding Yang in place by a broken arm, what rage she felt died as she was made helpless by him. She couldn't pull away, the pain unbearable at every attenmpt to free herself.

"Yang!" Blake ran in, swing her ribboned blade in a wide circle before launching it at the assailant. As the blade neared, it harmlessly bounced off with a deafening gong. Where it struck, the barbarian's shield tattoo gave an ethereal glow. "How did..?"

"Blake, get back!" Weiss ran past, closing the distance between her teammate and their opponent.

She thrust forward, narrowly missing as Yang was released. Rather than retreat, however, the mountain of a man instead took hold of his longblade, readying it to engage Weiss' rapier. Again, his tattoos glowed.

"STOP!" Weiss and the barbarian lowered their weapons and took notice of Ruby. "Just... let me explain!"

---------------------------------------------------

"Geez! You could've told me that you were just looking out for her!"

"I couldn't," Jaune said as he healed Yang's arm with his aura, "you broke my jaw."

"Yeah, well, don't be so scary next time. Or kidnap people's little sisters. How would you feel?"

"I would probably do the same thing." Jaune nodded, wrapping a bandage over her arm. "Of course, I wouldn't punch them in the face."

"Guess I'm more of a risk-taker than you." Yang stuck her tongue out.

"Not to interrupt your stupidity, but why exactly did you... carry Ruby away?"

"I needed to get her alone." Jaune said, raising many eyebrows. "Uh, to get her away from anyone who might be listening to you guys. That's why I grabbed her and not her stuff."

"What did you want to tell us?" Blake asked.

Jaune opened his mouth to argue, but there was no point now. They really were a team. He held back tears as memories of JNPR came to mind. Swallowing his pride, he spoke his truth.

"Do not trust Ozpin."

[hwaddist]

So I had a Big Autism moment the other day so.

Here I present you: The QSMP member’s Baldur’s Gate 3 (d&d) classes

Some notes:

•I FORGOT CARRE, BUT HE WOULD BE AN ARCANE TRICKSTER ROGUE

• Honestly, Tubbo and Pierre are both artificiers but bg3 doesnt have it as a class so they’re wizzards

• Both Cellbit and Mike have Cucurucho as their patron

• My friends and I were wondering what to do with Mouse because technically speaking she’s a demon someone would make a pact with but then we decided to make her a Barbarian because she’s batshit crazy (affectionate)

• I almost made Pac a fighter but then my friend pointed out Gloom Stalker Ranger and i was like Wait. Ur right.

• the first draft didnt had rubius but I changed it after yesterdays stream

• im still not 100% convinced with archfey warlock luzu but hes still a warlock nonetheless

• im also having second thoughts about wild magic sorcerer maxo but i think im keeping it because i think its silly (sapo peta would also be a wild magic sorcerer)

• charlies the most bard to ever bard ever

• i almost made phil a tempest cleric but then my friends pointed war and i saw the light

• this whole thing started because i made bbh in bg3 as a tiefling and my mind went crazy

• mariana when him and charlie got flippa, made an oath to devote and love his family. The oath broke when he killed flippa.

[mosses-gate-3]

How does Andis, Salix and Ren feel about kids? Do they like them, or just find them annoying? Are they any good with kids? Would they ever want kids of their own?

Bonus question: Tell us about their kids if they ever have any!

okokok I did do a similar ask a bit ago with Salix & Andy BUT! I have been thinking a ridiculous amount about regale children

Ren I think is surprisingly good with kids. One of their biggest strengths is keeping a calm, neutral outward appearance in stressful situations, and I think that translates over really well to childcare. They enjoy spending time with the kids at the Grove. As for whether they'd actually want kids of their own:

I don't think they and Gale can physically have bio kids together, nor do they want to. But I was thinking about them and children and a thing came to me.

“So you remember the egg from the creche, yes?” “…The one we put in a bag of holding six years ago and forgot about?” “…Well, I'd say it was less a random choice and more a calculated decision made for the good of the egg and our group, but yes - I've been researching and it’s fascinating, really, Githyanki eggs can incubate for extended amounts of time in the Astral plane due to a number of unique conditions and, theoretically, this property extends to pocket dimensions such as those created by a bag of holding. It’s been a dream of mine to study the precise conditions that make this possible for years–" "Gale, love, didn't you say this was urgent?" "Right! Yes. It’s hatching.” “It’s WHAT.”

...And then they go around frantically calling up Lae'zel and the others, and there's an impromptu six-year-anniversary reunion while they try to figure out how the fuck to take care of an egg baby. Featuring Dadstarion... NOT.

After he's safely born they all have a very long conversation about who should keep it. Wyll and Karlach are the obvious first choice but they're dealing with a lot of change at the moment (Wyll's training to become Grand Duke and they're moving back in to Baldur's Gate and aren't in a place for a baby yet.) Lae'zel is still fighting a civil war, Shadowheart has a lot on her plate already, and I wouldn't trust Astarion anywhere near a baby let alone with CUSTODY of one (see previous). So Ren and Gale keep the child and name him Xan. Look into his dead, soulless eyes.

They all try to stay in his life in some way. Lae'zel visits when she can. Shadowheart is like a cool wine aunt who's always around. Astarion is like a cool wine aunt who's never around. Karlach and Wyll, Wyll especially, are practically co-parenting the kid. He's not in the right situation for kids right now but he will be the best damn babysitter this side of Avernus.

But fear not, because in a couple years the two of them will have kids of their own! DAD WYLL LIVES IN MY BRAIN RENT FREE OKAY. I think their names are Talia and Jayden and they're raised very close with Xan, he sees them as his younger siblings and is very protective of them.

Here's Xan and Jayden! Talia is probably behind them. At this point Xan's about 10, Talia is 7 or so, and Jayden is around 4 or 5.

Xan inherited Gale's expressiveness and tendency to gesticulate, and Ren's logical mind and speech mannerisms. I think he's generally very responsible. Other than that he's hardly similar to his parents at all, he doesn't care for academics much and most likely becomes a melee class later. They're very proud of him anyway; it's probably for the better he didn't turn out Mystra's next Chosen or something.

When he gets older he and his siblings set out to become adventurers! Talia is a cleric of no deity in particular (that is a thing you can do I looked it up apparently the power can just come from something you really believe in) and Jayden's a sorcerer (I have Karlach classed as a wild magic barbarian in my playthrough which is where he gets it from.) Xan is a paladin, I don't know which oath, probably Ancients or Devotion. I'm currently working on aged up designs for them, I'll reblog this with them when I'm done.

That's pretty much all I have so far but this is pretty much what I consider canon after the game, at least in Ren's playthrough! I'm sure they'll be excellent parents. Even if they did forget a literal living baby in their bag of holding for SIX YEARS... But it's fine there was a lot going on. Thank god for the weird githyanki physics I made up.

[evilbeanieman]

YTTD Main Cast as RPG Classes

Sara- Knight. She's known as the samurai woman, I mean, what's the western equivalent of a samurai? She's got the whole justice and honor thing going for her too.

Joe-Squire. He's essentially Sara's support and travel buddy. He basically is her support for the entire first chapter, and we can see that she depends on him from time to time to help her get through things. Every knight needs a squire, and Joe would be pretty great at it, I think.

Kai- Assassin. This one is kind of a no-brainer if you ask me. Although, given that Kai hasn't been able to kill anyone, I would say he's got the skills of an assassin but probably keeps the front of being an Inn Keeper or Servant.

Keiji-Royal Guard. Considering Keiji's past in the force, it would make sense to put him in a similar position. Since he's quit that however, I'd say he lays low as a commoner with the skills of a trained guard.

Shin-Shop Keeper/Wizard's Apprentice. Shin has no physical capabilities whatsoever, but I imagine that would be balanced by an extremely high affinity with magic. Though he lacks complete proper training since his mentor..."disappeared" a while ago. Since then, he's been working as a shop keeper and studying magic on the side.

Kanna-Witch (Botanical magic). Okay yeah this is somewhat inspired by her death in chapter 2. Though she does go through a lot of character growth in the game, so pairing her with plants isn't too out there. Additionally I think it would also match since Shin has an affinity for magic, so it'd make sense that his sister does as well.

Gin-Werebeast/Fae. Kind of another obvious one. I would like to think Gin is like a kemonomimi, probably one of a wolf or even dogcat hybrid. Considering his sometimes wild nature, and love for animals, he'd definitely be a child of the forest. The fae part is mainly since he likes to be a bit mischievous and silly.

Qtaro-Barbarian. I mean, Gin's nickname for him is literally "muscle gorilla," I don't think you can get any more raw strength than this class. I would think Qtaro is a part of some guild of fighters or adventurers and had a team he would do bounties with.

Reko-Bard. Another obvious choice. I don't think I need to explain much here, as she is a performer. Though I'd say she's definitely more of a physical attacker than most bards, but still has powerful magic in her tunes.

Alice-Bard/Outlaw. Similar to Reko. His magical music isn't as strong as hers, leading him to attack physically more often. Although ever since one fatal encounter, he's been on the run. Now he tries to rely solely on his strength, as to not draw too much attention with music that might sound familiar...

Nao-Witch (Painting magic). Again a bit of an obvious choice. She can bring some of her drawings to reality, although it takes quite the amount of magic. She has more training and control over her magic thanks to studying under Mishima.

Mishima-Scholar/Potion Seller. Mishima wouldn't really be a fighter, instead being the knowledgeable scholar you could come to when in need of information...or potions, if you're strong enough for them, that is. The potion seller bit I think would aid in his "mad scientist" kind of vibe in the og game, but also because I thought the idea was funny.

BONUS ROUND

Midori- Necromancer. We all know this is the obvious choice for him. I'd say that while his main focus is necromancy, he'd also specialize in other magic so he can keep it a secret. That doesn't mean his experiments are hidden well, however.

Maple- Homunculus. She would be the result of one of Midori's experiments gone...wrong? Right? An incredibly powerful being made of magic, capable of transforming her body when engaged in combat. Also, she is madly in love with him. Imagine a sort of "Dr. Frankenstein and his monster" kind of relationship between the two, where instead of the monster hating the creator, she's super lovey dovey to him.

[iaus]

hey !! i just read one of your fics and wanted to say you’re a fantastic writer !! since i only read the one i wanted to ask more about your fhsona freyja? if you wanted to talk about her at all, if not then just know you’re really good at description lol

oh my god you're so sweet!! 💕 i will happily overshare about them. ngl i was absolutely inspired by mr oyama making the craziest barbarian build and i'm like.... obsessed with barbarians at the moment so i was like. what is a batshit multiclass i could do that would be really funny. (landed on bard/barbarian)

i cannot draw worth a damn so i used a picrew but i did fill out a whole fhsona sheet for them.

also attached the tweets that were attached this image because i think. it really sells the jace madness i was starting to fall into

all the text is so small on the sona sheet because i was editing it on my laptop after eli (my DM friend) was like you should make a fhsona!!

when i made them i basically had this. mental image of a regina george-esque character combined with that text post (which i know is on my blog SOMEWHERE) but is just "imagine a passive-aggressive barbarian" and thus. freyja came into existence.

but to just kinda round up the tiny text that is SO hard to read:

Class: Senior (Whispers Bard / Wild Magic Barbarian)

Age: 19 / Pronouns: They/Him / Race: Firbolg

Family: Single mom + Grand parents / Middle child of 5 + helps take care of cousins on the weekends

Heroic Deed: Saved some middle schoolers from a demon someone summoned during summer break.

Personal Facts:

-> Started out in bard classes; transferred to barbarian at the end of sophomore year. (note: in my own head i feel like they started having issues with rage, combined with the wild surges everyone was like..... no you gotta transfer out of bard classes for your safety and your classmates safety.) -> Held back junior year for punching a teacher. (Note: while yes this would 100% get a student expelled, i feel like aguefort would be like. this is a fine example of what a passionate adventurer SHOULD be we can just repeat the year and call it good right :D also i still think it would be funny. it's still jace in my head. maybe porter. but i think porter would keep that under wraps because he'd be like. ah yes. a proper barbarian.) -> Tavern brawler feat -> Pastel emo mean girl -> Uses bard spells for evil (gossip) -> Works part time as a barista when not babysitting their cousins. Tells you how you want your coffee.

in my mind's eye freyja's a junior (for the second time) when tbk are freshmen and has HUGE beef with both porter and jace and is probably known for just straight up walking out of class after picking arguments with porter.

i think, despite the fact that they are extremely aggro towards specific teachers, they graduate without issue in tbk's sophomore year and during spring break probably would vandalize porter's office. for funsies for their senior prank.

also ngl i like. really want to make a teacher fhsona because i think i would get REALLY into that

[adarkrainbow]

Spooky season fairytales (6)

And we reach the penultimate post of this series! After looking at actual fairytale adaptations (well... roughly), for this post I want to love at fantasy movies that are not any adaptation of any specific tale or story... But which were made with the intentions of having a "fairytale feel" or a fairytale lore. Dark or creepy movies inspired by fairytales as a whole. Basically "dark fairytale fantasy".

And of course I have to begin with the most FAMOUS dark fairytale movie of our century... Guillermo del Toro's "Pan's Labyrinth", in the original Spanish, "El Laberinto del Fauno".

Do I need to present this movie? Probably not, since it was one of del Toro's masterpices, but to simply put it... This is a dark, haunting, poetic but tragic movie following a little girl's life in the Spain of Franco. Said little girl meets in the ruins of an old labyrinth, guided by fairies, a faun, who reveals to her she is the lost princess of a fairy realm... But to regain her place, she will have to undergo fairytale-trials. All while the little girl enjoys her "changeling fantasy", we follow the harsh and horrifying everyday life of World War II Spain that unfolds around her: the girl's step-father is a Falangist captain who hunts down with cruelty the resistance in the area, while her mother is having a very complicated pregnancy. And as the real-world piles on the horrors - famine, execution, torture - so does the fairy-world becomes darker and darker, filled with monsters, ogres and blood...

Of course, Guillermo del Toro did other dark "fairy pieces" - such as Hellboy II, which is a dark and gritty urban-fantasy homage to the fair folk - and recently returned to the fairytale world with his acclaimed Pinocchio.

1985's Legend, by Ridley Scott, is usually considered as one of the "great 80s fantasy movies", alongside pieces such as Ladyhawke, The Dark Crystal, Conan the Barbarian, Willow and more. However "Legend" is also, and this is less evoked, one of the prime examples of a movie belonging to the genre of "fairytale fantasy" - alongside stories such as Stardust or The Neverending Story.

After all, all the elements are there. The main hero is a brave young "wild man" of the woods, who must save a princess trapped by an evil monster, with the help of fairies and elves, and the whole quest goes through numerous folkloric motifs and characters - the unicorn, the water-hag, the fight of day and night, the endless winter... But speaking of "endless winter", the reason why this movie is featuring here is because of how dark it becomes. Truly. The main villain is even the literal embodiment of Darkness, an evil creature sporting the most iconic look of a devil in the history of cinema, and played by none other than Tim Curry himself. He sends hordes of goblins devour babies and kill unicorns throughout endless winter and ever-ending night... To reach him one must cross a monster-infected swamps leading to a dark palace of venomous charms, dancing statues and cannibal feasts... And even the elves and fairy sidekicks are truer to Brian Froud illustrations and the original "fair folk", being whimsical, capricious, easily angered and just as dangerous as the villains they're fighting...

Coraline. Another great piece of "fairytale fantasy".

Coraline (the movie or the book it is based on, the two have several differences but complement each other very well) is the story of a young girl living your typical "travel to another magical world" plot, as she discovers a secret door allowing her to escape her dreary, boring and unpleasant life to find an alternate, whimsical, fantastical and charming version of her own family and neighbors. But of course, this being a Neil Gaiman story, things quickly grow strange and eerie, as talking cats, fairy-ghosts, shapeshifting witches and buttons sewn in place of eyes come to turn the dream into a nightmare, and then into a battle of wits to survive against a dark and old magic...

Yet another VERY famous piece - there's a lot of famous pieces I am covering here, but hey, not my fault the good stuff is getting the recognition it deserves!

Over the Garden Wall, an animated mini-series that was created by the same man behind "Adventure Time", telling the story of two brothers as they try to find a way home while venturing into a bizarre and magical forest called "The Unknown". They are guided by a talking bird in hope of finding a good witch who will help them - all the while mysterious and dark figures such as the Woodsman or the Beast linger in the shadows and keep crossing path with them...

Over the Garden Wall is a perfect autumn watch, since it actually takes place during the autumn season, the first episodes exploring an Halloweenesque harvest festival, while the lasts take place in winter. More than just autumn imagery, the show relies heavily on the "vintage" and "old" imagery of early 20th, 19th and even 18th centuries America, building its wonders and magic with vintage Halloween cards, Colonial or Industrial-era fashions, Betty Boop or Silly Symphonies cartoons, the Dogville Comedies and the "Game of Frog Pond" board game... However, under its at first whimsical and fanciful appearance, the mini-series quickly reveal a haunting tale worthy of the darkest fairytales, exploring themes such as betrayal, despair, death and sacrifices.

In fact, "Over the Garden Wall" was inspired by numerous fairytales, hence its fairytale feel. Many, many people commented that, upon watching the series, they felt the exact same thing they experienced when, as a kid, they discovered new fairytales - I also felt it, and this proves the power of this series that truly captures the essence of what a fairytale is. On top of reusing fairytale tropes (two children exploring woods filled with girls turned into birds, good and bad witches, strange talking beasts...) and explicitely referencing some "fairytale-like" children novels (especially "The Wizad of Oz"), the very artstyle of the show was inspired by "fairytale art", ranging from Gustave Doré's illustrations of Perrault to Tenniel's Alice in Wonderland drawings, passing by old Andersen illustrations.

Ah, finally a more obscure piece! At last for non-French people... La Cité des Enfants Perdus, The City of Lost Children. A 1995 movie by Jean-Pierre Jeunet. Now, Jeunet is one of those French moviemakers distinctively recognizeable thanks to his very unique style of movie making. You will recognize this when you know that he is behind the movies "Delicatessen" (the one about a former clown in a post-war world behind hired in a building dominated by a cannibalistic butcher) and the "Amélie Poulain" movie (about a quirky Parisian waitress who decides to change whimsically the life of those around her). Jeunet enjoys the bizarre, the unusual, strange technologies, extravagant characters, dark humor, absurd comedy, and oniric or fairytale-like atmosphere... And this all blooms in the darkest and eeriest way in this movie.

To put the story simply (which is a challenge since it is a complex movie)... Off the shores of a shadowy, dirty, corrupt fishing town, in a manor in the middle of the sea (on top of an abandoned oil rig), an old mad scientist regularly captures children. For you see the scientist is unable to dream, and tries to steal away the dreams of children - which never works, since being captured by a creepy old man makes the children have nightmares rather than sweet dreams. One day, the little brother of a simple-minded circus strongman is captured - and the strongman teams up with a little girl, a street-savy member of a group of street urchins, to try to get him back. The story is further muddled by the presence of a cult of "cyclops" in town that do the dirty work of the mad scientit for him, the threat of greedy conjoined sisters that run the gang the little girl is part of, and the strange entourage of the mad scientist himself (six identical brothers acting like children, a dwarf-wife, and a sentient, talking brain in a jar).

This movie truly feels like a dream - like one of those dark, strange dreams that never fully go into a nightmare while still walking at the edge, and the story, no matter how feverish it can get, still keeps certain cohesive elements to maintain its flow of sinister wonders (such as the theme of family, heavily explored). The movie never goes into actual magic - we are more into a proto-steampunk world crossed with the mad science of Gothic literature and horror movies - but its oniric, bizarre and borderline surreal treatment of the subject did earn this movie the classification of "science-fantasy" and "dark fantasy", as mythological, folkloric and fantasy archetypes can be clearly seen throughout the science-fiction setting (the "cyclops" for example, or the very idea of "a creepy old man stealing children's dreams").

Heck - this movie was one of the prime inspirations behind "Little Nightmares"!

And finally, I cheat a little here, but I had to include it: Disney's Hocus Pocus. This is a classic of Halloween movies, a fun but dark horror-comedy for teens, (well rather like a full comedy but with elements that make it horrific here and there), campy in all the good ways, and with the greatest trio of witches ever depicted on stage since Shakespeare's Weird Sisters.

Now, the movie itself is not very much fairytale like. It is a Halloween comedy, an urban-fantasy story for teenagers, drawing upon the myth of the witch and the legends surrounding witchcraft. However, precisely because the movie explores the figure of the witch, there are several fairytale references here and there. While the Sanderson sisters were mostly build out of the Christian myth of the witch (using human-skin bound grimoires, having sold their souls to the devil, tied to black cats, summoning ghouls out of graves, hate salt...), there are also several parts of their characters tied to fairytale witches. Hansel and Gretel is the most obvious one - they are child-eating witches living into the woods who lure children to their home before "devouring" them (in souls if not body) - but Snow-White is also among the references (a very vain witch who is obsessed with staying the fairest/youngest and kills children to do so?). And of course, there's all the fairytale-witches tropes ranging from "turning people into animals" (here a cat rather than a frog) to the use of the number three.

Oh yes, and let's not forget the specific use of an oven...

[dungeonsandblorbos]

Campaign/Character Intro: The Cauldron & Kettle Questing Co. vs Chaos, feat. Jun Vyardes

Status: Completed System: DnD5e

About: This was my second campaign with my university TTRPG group (the same folks as The Orphic Uprising/Amazonomachy), and ran a full 69 sessions (nice) mostly during the COVID shutdowns. It was set in the world of Acquisitions, Incorporated, an actual play podcast by Penny Arcade based around the idea of classic adventuring parties but make it ~capitalism~, and primarily played out of the official Acquisitions, Inc. playbook, plus some additional homebrew expansions and a nice little extra homebrew arc on the end that introduced us to the incredible chaos of the D10,000 wild magic table. The story ended up going real hard on the queer found family vibes, and there were several story beats that made us all real emotional together, which was really cool to be able to do while we were all forced to play remotely because, ya know, pandemic.

Genres: Medieval fantasy, Corporate fantasy Rating: Teen General content warnings: strong language, mature humor, immature humor, drug and alcohol consumption, fantasy violence. Posts may not be tagged due to the generally mild nature of most of this campaign's content. Tags: #cauldron & kettle questing co., #jun vyardes, #tim and jun

story and character details under the cut

The Story Our story here began when our newly assembled party was mistaken for an established, experienced adventuring party and sent by Acq, Inc. to investigate a collapsed tunnel in Waterdeep, where we found a piece of a strange but powerful artifact with no clue as to its origins or where the rest of it was. There were a few hiccups, but we were ultimately successful, so as soon as we were done with that dungeon, we were sent down to Phandalin to take over an abandoned Acq, Inc. franchise location and investigate the disappearance of its old party.

There, we established The Cauldron & Kettle Questing Company (and The Cauldron & Kettle Cafe) and grew into quite the accomplished little Acq, Inc. subsidiary! We also began unravelling a dangerous conspiracy involving an eldritch-worshipping cult determined to open a rift in the universe to bring their gods to the material plane and destroy reality as we know it. No pressure for a bunch of newbie adventurers, right?

The Blorbos

I played Jun Vyardes (depicted above), a 30-year-old half-elf light cleric/bard. Having grown up the daughter of a traveling bard, she was great with change, but never learned how to put down roots. When she left Daddy Bard's side and devoted herself to Vestia, a human goddess of domestic fires and revelry, she thought she'd found her home. For some time, she really was content there—but the road still called to her, so with her goddess's blessing, she set out on a new adventure, and joined Acq, Inc. It only took her a few months of questing with her new party that for her, home would never be a place—it always had been and always would be the people she loved. Jun was fiercely devoted to her friends, hyping them up as often as she sassed them. She had some killer recipes for fantasy edibles, played a mean fiddle, and was a talented firedancer. And despite being a cleric, she had the worst Religion bonus of the entire party because she never actually went to any kind of school thanks to the whole "travelling bard childhood" thing. She was technically supposed to be support in combat, but she wore medium armor and could throw fireballs and figured it would be easier to help her friends while fighting right next to them, so she very often rushed in first. And that only got her nearly killed like, three times, so it's fine. It's totally fine. Jun is fine.

The other key members of the Cauldron & Kettle Questing Co. were Tim Cobbletoss, a mild-mannered half-orc barbarian raised by halflings and Jun's half-brother, played by my lovely husband @somethingclevermahogony; Taku, a whooping crane aaracokra and path of the four elements monk who hit like a tank but couldn't take hits himself, played by the fantastic @ostrich-runner; and Briny, a perky not-goblin-anymore bloodhunter who loved learning new things, their friends, the sea, and gambling, although they didn't actually really know how to gamble.

We also had our own B-team of NPCs, consisting of Gorkow the goblin with a massive sword he called his "butter knife"; Noriel the wet cat mandolin-player; Min the messenger; Susan, the oddly intelligent ogre; and Susan's two very fluffy dire wolves. Other recurring favorite NPCs included Jun's totally not girlfriend, Eleni; Jun and Tim's father, Girasol Vyardes; Taku's baby siblings Tela and Teleku; Tim's favorite erotica romance author, Dorkas Nimblewood; and our beloved Tea Trolley, a steam-powered vehicle shaped like a teapot that we used as a battering ram in multiple combat encounters.

[mongoose-bite]

I don't take many screenshots, but when I do it's of my girl going '...really?' I should save them up for a DO IT FOR HER meme.

Gale is nice, but Faye is REALLY uncomfortable being his dealer, and thinks a lot of his friendliness is just cause she's his supplier. All this wizard stuff goes over her head, tall as she is.

Wyll was very much 'Same hat!' only 'Same job!' I too spent my time rescuing peasants from goblins.

His uh...significant other is a significant problem, but my girl's reaching the point of trying to brainstorm her own dark secrets just to fit in and failing miserably because making things up is not in her nature and she's not smart like that. Although she did eat a tadpole. I don't think she's gonna do it again though. Also somehow I made my guardian into The Rock, but as a drow, which is a little weird (I did not spend long on him.)

Faye does not like or know how to talk to children; she's most happy carrying them out of a burning building or something similar. Actual conversation with them? No. There's a kid getting yelled at in the tiefling camp and she feels bad about ignoring it but really does not want to get involved.

Karliah is lovely in every way (so hot) but I just don't think I'm gonna need her in my party. Although a barbarian, fighter, paladin, wizard combo worked surprisingly well until we found a locked door.

Gale didn't seem to notice how sexy a situation he was in though. It was literally too hot for him; I finished hunting down those 'paladins' and I immediately opened my journal to read the updates, and completely missed Karliah going critical and closed my journal to see Gale unconscious at my feet and the sounds of destruction from within the tollhouse. I turn my back for two seconds i stg.

Asterion continues to tolerate my presence. He keeps getting inspired, but that doesn't improve his opinion of me any. I even bought him a nice bow, with which he almost soloed a giant spider.

Laz'ael blew mostly cold and then suddenly hot. Faye is surprised and flattered enough that she'll go for it, but she's gonna feel weird about it afterwards. I don't think Laz'ael is her type at the end of the day. I, on the other hand, might make my dragonborn a druid? Maybe a sorcerer...

I did finally find someone that made her smile though. His name's Scratch.

I also had a weird dream IRL where my PC was somehow from Yuri on Ice and there was an in-game event where the other characters showed up, and I really wanted a picture of Yuri and Otabek, cause Yuri's in-game model looked so good. I want to play him now. Adds to list: tiny blond elvish wild magic barbarian. Asterion will probably like him better.

[paganwitchisis]

"What Love Can Change" Chapter 10

Chapter ten: You’re Alive

Rated: E for Explicit!!

Pairing: AFAB Female Tav/Spawn Astarion

Words: 9,090

TRIGGER WARNING -Breeding kink, violence, descriptions of trauma, sexual assault, torture, suicide attempt and mention/idealization, self harm, starvation, depression, pregnancy, hyper-sexuality, and rape.

“Spawn!” The vampire looked at Astarion. “What year is it?”

Astarion went to Tav’s side and replied to the creature, “Fuck you!”

“Such disrespect? Where is your master? Has he taught you no manners?”

Tav got to her feet with Karlach and Astarion, elated to find him there with her and in his armor, ready to do battle. Tav replied to the question. “We killed him.”

While talking to the creature, Minsc tried to throw Boo at him, but it failed. The creature had caught him mid-flight, which made Minsc distressed.

“What is the year!?”

Minsc yelled for him to drop Boo while Gale shouted the answer, “1492 DR!”

Thankfully, Boo was able to get out of the vampire’s clutches, as he was unconcerned. The vampire laughed and looked at the party before him. “You fools. I am Eravask the Forebear. You have no hope to defeat me, as I am the first. I have been around since the 600’s, just waiting for some idiot to trigger my defenses and set me free. I knew Zholton would come after me, so I planned ahead.”

Astarion glanced at Tav, who saw the look but couldn’t address it due to the creature before them. The vampire was familiar from the text they found in Cazador’s lair. Tav knew this as well as her husband, and she knew he was an old vampire, but beyond that she wasn’t sure of much more. They took down a vampire lord though, so doesn’t that mean they can also take him down as well?

Before the group, the creature was attacked by Minsc yet again, who was hit and tossed aside. Gale threw more magic at him, and the battle resumed. Karlach swung her sword while Astarion and Tav battled together as a deadly pair. The vampire picked up on this, punching Tav in the armored chest very hard. She was punched so hard that her body flew with record speed against the decrepit wall on the side of the room, smashing into it with the force of a wild rothe charging. Astarion grew very worried, but he couldn’t react right away as the vampire grabbed him by the armor.

“I see. It is you I smell on the girl. A vampire and a mortal? I should drain her dry just to teach you a lesson.” The vampire laughed as Astarion broke free of the hold, driving his daggers into him, but he still stood. “She smells like she is with child. It is not often I am brought delicacies.” The vile creature stalked off in the direction of Astarion’s wife, and panic spread in the vampire.

Thankfully, Karlach was able to, with her barbarian strength and rage, do some damage to the undead creature, while Gale started focusing on radiant damage. Astarion then looked up and saw that the sun had yet to set, and he demanded that they focus on the ceiling. Astarion looked back towards his wife, but with all the rubble, he could only make out some blood on the floor and her hand unclasped from her sword outside the stone. He was so very scared. Minsc crawled back to his feet and started to use his brute strength against a pillar supporting the structure, Gale aiding the endeavor while also distracting the creature. Finally, Karlach took out another support beam. Astarion finally was able to make it to the other side where his wife laid buried under the rubble, and with hurried hands, he moved the stone away. She was covered in blood by the time he found her face and neck. He searched for a pulse and found it weak and thready. Astarion started to lose his composure. No. Not yet! Their last conversation was a fight. They were yelling at each other. That can’t be the last time they speak! He couldn’t lose his wife when she finally agreed to share eternity with him and grow a family with him! After she asked to birth his children! The future they had planned together couldn’t end like this!

Astarion turned to grab her pack and saw the cave collapse partially, exposing the vampire to the sun and killing him. He grabbed the strongest potion he could find and held Tav’s head as gently as he could, tipped it back, and poured it down her throat. Karlach and the others, at this point, were clearing the rubble off the rest of her body as he did so. Astarion was crying…breaking down as the liquid started dribbling down the side of her mouth, not being swallowed.

“N..no. No! Please, you gotta drink. Please!!” Astarion pleaded. Their friends never had seen Astarion like this before. He was shaking, starting to hyperventilate even when he took a swig of the potion and clasped his lips to hers.

READ THE REST ON AO3 HERE! AS IT IS TOO LONG A CHAPTER FOR TUMBLR. (It won't let me post the whole thing)

[a-halfblood-named-coin]

Saw DND:Honor among thieves and I have THOUGHTSSSSS

Disclaimer: I am a dnd nerd but not intensely so. So compared to other more serious dnd people I probably care less about ‘game accuracy’ or whatever. Also, if your gonna reblog with “weren’t we boycotting” or smth, just leave bestie also SPOLIERS duh

ANYWAY- my main critique is the pacing. Overall, the fast paced nature helped keep the vibe flowing without getting caught but their were a couple times where I kinda got overwhelmed with how often we were switching scenes. That and I agree with the critiques of the tiefling design being rather boring, especially when you factor in her whole “I hate humans” thing since she looks almost exactly like them.

…and that’s it….no really! I found myself enjoying this film FAAARRRR more than I thought I would. At the end, I think why I loved it much more than similar movies is that it nailed the humor and comedic timing. It has its serious moments and it does them well, but overall it’s a really fucking funny movie where one of the main villains is defeated with a potato to the face. There are several stellar jokes, like-

The fat dragon

Everything Xenk says

The death of the red wizard lady lol

“What’s wrong with my lips!?”

The dwarven bridge

The fake window at the end

And of course NAT 20 potato!

I was laughing a lot throughout the movie, definitely it’s best aspect in my opinion. But I also loved the relationship between Edgin (the bard) and Hulga (the barbarian). I LOVE that they have raised this child platonically and have no desire to change that. There’s no secret crush or anything, they’re both interested in the opposite sex, just not each other. Simon is stellar, his arc is very sweet and simple and I love how his magic is shown. I like how he knows what he can or cannot do, the range of his spells and stuff like that. He doesn’t just wave his hands and magic just happens, it’s an actual skill. Of course the Druid solos, the use of the wild shape is so creative and very fun. And xenk (the paladin) is so deadpan and serious, I love him. All these characters are very silly and fun and fit very well into the goofy writing. I will say, the red wizards are not very fleshed out, but for most of the movie they aren’t really the main villain so it’s whatever to me.

The effects were really dope! They were several times where I think the practical effects really made the creatures that much more real. Defiantly a great case study for why it’s a great idea to ditch CGI (at least partially) and go practical.

Lastly, the serious scenes are really nice here, I’ll discuss two.

1st, the scene where they almost break up. Every good campaign needs to almost break up but I really like this scene. Yes, Edgin has lied by omission but only because he truly believes that Simon can do it. I like how he brings them back together, he doesn’t exclude himself from being a fuckup as well. But you have to keep trekking until youre happy, becuase if you don’t, your past trauma has won. Its very sweet how they all sit together. But what I love most is that they pivot their plan, Edgin still believes in Simon but realizes that not every insecurity can be over come by encouragement. So they come up with a plan that feels more comfortable, but just as crazy.

And 2nd, of course the death scene at the end. Yes it was predictable,but hulga dying and coming back is not what makes this scene, it’s Edgin putting his daughter first. Obviously I think she would want to meet her birth mother, but at the same time it’s a women she’s never known. Edgin realizes that he’s the only person here who would rather bring back his wife than Hulga. He comes to terms with the fact the Hulga is just as much his child’s parent as him or his wife, she means just as much to her. So, finally, he puts his daughters feelings first and resurrects the closest thing to a mother she’s ever had. It’s heartbreaking, but the action of a true parent.

OVERALL, I really loved this movie, again a lot more than I thought I would. Its funny, witty, fast paced fantasy fun. If you don’t want to give money to WOTC or Hasbro, watch it after it gets released online. But I definitely recommend it!

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

WIP Monday? Yeah!

Lily (tiefling wild magic barbarian) waits for Gale to return from his visit with Mystra. NSFW.

Lily paced in front of Mystra’s statue at the Stormshore Tabernacle for what seemed like hours. Days. Years. Forever.

“You know dear, if you keep pacing like that, then they’ll have to replace the floor.” Astarion quipped, trying to keep the mood light as he, Lily, and Halsin awaited the wizard’s return. “I suppose that’s not too troublesome considering your mother is loaded.”

That’s certainly one word for it.

Halsin opened his mouth to speak but stopped as Mystra’s statue glowed purple.

And with a flash of Weave, Gale was back.

Lily rushed to him and hugged him tightly, nearly lifting him from the ground. “Oh my gods, you’re here! Did it go alright? Did she agree to remove the orb if we get the Crown? Are you okay? I was so worried!” She rambled, still hugging him.

“Erm, m-my love, I fear I cannot breathe…”

Oops.

She released her lover and gripped him by the shoulders, looking into his beautiful and perfect brown eyes. “Sorry! I was just so worried—”

Astarion nudged Halsin. “I think it’s time we leave the lovebirds alone for a bit, hmm?” He said with a wink. He then spotted the gnomish priest and snarled, “Out. Now.”

I need to thank Astarion later with a nice, long feed.

But first!!!

As soon as they were alone, Lily made what her mother called an “executive decision.”

She grabbed him by the collar of his robes and shoved him against the altar in front of Mystra’s statue. Tugging on his lower lip, she whispered, “Gale love, how pissed off would Mystra be if I fucked you on her altar?” You threw him away. The perfect man and you tossed him aside. Now. He’s. MINE. Her lover, normally the very definition of a gentleman, growled. Oh that’s very hot! “Exceedingly displeased, but how about we take it a step further, hmm?” With the snap of his fingers, their clothes were gone and strapped to Lily was a dildo the color of her pale pink skin. “Take me, darling. Please. I beg of you…”

[dishonored-pendletwin]

how'd she meet her party and why a wild magic barbarian?

Wow this got long lmao, anyway info dump be upon ye

Small bit of Campaign Context: So the setting we play in is homebrew, but borrows from 5E lore. And (while we're currently on the surface) 90% of this campaign is set in the Underdark. The general plot is a war is starting between the Drow and the Dwarves and our party has decided to side with the Dwarves. So! Ariana comes from a long line of Divine Sorcerers, her House has historically been blessed by Lolth with the gift of magic, until her that is. (Her and the party don't know know this yet, but she has been blessed by Eilistraee) Ariana is also the youngest of 10, however as the only daughter she is the heir to her House. Growing up Ariana was not very happy. Her mother, Matron Nassar, whomst I described to my DM as "someone with 0 redeeming qualities" was unsurprisingly awful, she didn't get along with half of her older brothers, and drow politics just suck ass. Worst of all for her, given her title/position and relation to her mother, many drow who were socially below her were terrified of her, leaving Ariana pretty much alone the first 80 years of her life (until she met her best friend and crush ((who we just saved last session from the feywild)) Jumping forward 20ish years from meeting him, Matron Nassar grew tired of Ariana failing her magic lessons (lessons made to teach someone blessed by Lolth were very ineffective at teaching someone not blessed by Lolth), tired of her sneaking out all the time, and tired of Ariana just being a general disappointment to their House, so she threatened Ariana to do better by telling her she'd kill some random House servant for each failure, and then proceeded to Blight some poor dude. Not wanting to be responsible for anyone else's death, and just generally being done with this life, Ariana ran away from home that night. She eventually found herself in the Dwarven owned territory of the Underdark where she was adopted by and older Dwarf, who after 8 years of living with him, considers her his daughter. Now with all this in mind I can better answer the actual questions you asked. (Technically speaking Ariana's first lv should have been Sorc, but we started at lv 5 and the DM didn't care sooo) So Ariana is a Wild Surge Barbarian because of her magical blessing (but lack of proper training) + her combat training from her Dwarf Dad Dimitriv. Basically, Ariana has the ability to do magic, but without the proper training it kinda just happens sometime [read: when using Rage] When she was taken in by Dimitriv he lent her his old Maul and trained her how to fight with it using dwarven techniques, something her old family would have considered barbaric. (Rage I do RP as Angry sometimes, but it also gets RP'd as an intense focus) [The final reason is I wanted to play Barb, but the other subclasses didn't really call to me, and her backstory came from picking this Sub Class] As for how she met the party, Ariana lived with Dimitriv in a small dwarven town. The rest of the party is from the surface. One member came by himself and met her a week before, being offered the guest room at her fathers home. The other two are long time friends and came together looking to do crime. Being this is my DM's first game, there's a few stereotypical things he thought were funny doing - one being starting in a tavern. As two groups we entered to get drinks, but we left as one group when a large Drow raid attacked the town. Anyways, thank you for asking an allowing me to go off about Ariana, I love her so so so much for a number of different in and out of game reasons, and I love you giving me the opportunity to go off.