#we lived in the gaps between
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poorly-drawn-mdzs Ā· 7 months ago
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Good morning, Sleepyhead.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#'WWX was asleep for 4 days' is an incorrect factoid.#The average WWX sleeps for 8 hours. The PD-MDZS WWX who was asleep for 40 comics and 4 months is an outlier.#We are back to present day! I have missed drawing them!#Ah...the contrast between how the flashback ended (cold and distrustful) to how wwx wakes up (warm and watched over)...#The gap between the past and present is very important. Not just in this story but in our lives too.#The past can still hurt and it doesn't just go away with time as some say. It is the power of realizing that things have changed.#We can't get the good back. The bad memories have concluded. Those live somewhere else now.#It is hard to realize that you have to live for today and tomorrow. The past is so loud.#For WWX it is realizing that despite the mistrust in the past - He really does have faith that LWJ will be there for him.#It is the reflection of knowing that you changed and will keep changing and that change is good and kind sometimes.#But more importantly...and this I really do mean with all my heart:#It will all end up okay in the end. Even after the worst day. The most painful losses. You will get through it.#What feels like a breaking point is truthfully just another step you have to take. You'll get through it even though it feels like the end.#There are wonderful things you have yet to see. Friends you have yet to meet.#Even if it hurts so badly...one day it just aches. Someday you'll go a few weeks not remembering that it ever hurt.#Oh and because my izutsumi comic revealed many people were in need of hearing this:#You are loved. Right now. You are so loved right now. We just forget to tell each other that.#Go tell the people you love that they matter to you. I'm assigning you homework!!! You are graded on completion.
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snekdood Ā· 11 months ago
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"if we make america worse and more of a dictatorship that will be even harder to unravel and make it the way we want the country to be, maybe then everyone will join our Glorious Revolution!" bb girl you cant even be in the same room with someone who thinks you should vote, how in tf do you think you're gonna unite people to fight in The Revolution with you? it's gonna be you and your 5 friends, i hate to break it to you.
#i dont think you realize how repelling you and your politics are to everyone else#you get all of your validation for how Smart You Are from your friends and ignore any kind of feedback that suggests you should#change or do something differently. thats the only reason you're so convinced average people will go along with you bc you keep getting#affirmation from the people who ALREADY agree with you- but you have NO IDEA how to bridge the gap between people who agree#with you and disagree with you. you're horrible at convincing people of your side of things outside of straight up guilt tripping them#or bullying them like a highschooler. im sorry but the tools you learned to survive with as a kid aren't gonna help you in this situation.#the ONLY THING you can come up with to bridge that gap is a bloody revolution. thats how bad you are at this.#and you're also so bad at this and unimaginative that you dont even realize how THAT might not even be enough.#you cant imagine ANY kind of avenue to getting people to change AT ALL outside of blood and fire. and thats why people call you#an authoritarian.#i'll be honest- i really do think the world would be a better place if we did incremental change under a democratic president who wont#set the world on fire vs the godkingemperor republican WHO WONT EVEN LISTEN TO YOU AT ALL EVER AND MIGHT KILL YOU#FOR PUTTING UP A STINK. idk if you noticed but if that evil fuck gets into office we are severely outnumbered if he gets police#n shit to go after his own citizens. letting trump win is making this battle so much harder than it needs to be.#you are choosing trying to fix the world while its exploding vs trying to fix it before it explodes at all.#what is this like a procrastination thing? you wanna wait till the last minute to try? idfgi. wtf is wrong with you#throwing minority lives away to prove a point. and then you try to tell me you care. gtfoh.#accelerationists should never be taken seriously.
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not-the-coffee-machine4 Ā· 3 months ago
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Me: *tries to see what the Queen fans on TikTok have to say*
*Jim hate*
*ā€factsā€ that may or not be actually true*
*ā€Freddie Mercury was bisexual-ā€œ*
*Using Barbara Valentin as evidence*
*thinking things that happened in the movie actually happened irl*
*general misinformation about everyone and everything*
Me: aaaaand back to Tumblr I go
(open tags at your own risk, thereā€™s a whole essay in there)
#Why are Tumblr Queen fans the only sane ones like what happened#Coincidentally this is also how reading a lot of articles about them and their history tend to go#When did we stop looking at the primary sources like how did some of these disconnects grow so large#Freddie was just gay. YES he was out. YES he stated it publicly (he was still coy sometimes I will give you that)#No he didnā€™t know he had AIDS before Live Aid. Yes Jim was his major long term partner.#No the little people with trays of coke on their heads story isnā€™t true. No Freddie most likely didnā€™t take Princess Diana to a gay bar#No Roger didnā€™t accidentally give a fan a sex tape (there is a nugget of evidence that a tape was leaked but if so it didnā€™t happen like th#He locked himself in a TAPE CLOSET not a cupboard (this one doesnā€™t annoy me as much as the rest)#No Freddie was not āœØinvolvedāœØ with Barbara Valentin#No Love of My Life is not about Mary in the way people think it is#RESEARCH PLEASE I AM BEGGING#ITā€™S NOT EVEN THAT HARD TO FIND SOME OF THAT STUFF#ESPECIALLY IF YOUā€™RE A JOURNALIST LIKE LOOK AT THE PRIMARY SOURCES INSTEAD OF CONFIRMATION BIASING BY LOOKING AT ARTICLES#FROM OTHER JOURNALISTS WHO ALSO DID WHAT YOUā€™RE DOING#REEEAAADDDD#Itā€™s not even annoying because itā€™s about a topic I like itā€™s just literally the unimaginable gap between truth and reality#that is SO EASY TO BRIDGE AND YET. LIKE HOW IS IT THIS BIG OF A PROBLEM WHAT HAPPENED#I have written a novel in these tags so Iā€™ll stop yapping now but GOD it grinds my gears#queen#queen band#roger taylor#roger meddows taylor#brian may#sir brian may#freddie mercury#john deacon#Tiktok#queen fans
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choices-binglebonkus Ā· 4 months ago
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ILB MC and Elliot to this day remain the best sibling relationship in Choices.
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brittie-frog Ā· 8 months ago
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Rewatching the latest episode of Blank and I just keep laughing at Chet. That man is surrounded by queer women - his almost wife, his child's mother and his child - and yet he is homophobic. But he doesn't want to be the one to tell his child so the ridiculousness of him trying to get queer women Khun Neung to go over to a table of queer women (consisting of her sister Sam, the girl she likes Aneung, and the girl they're going to use to make each other jealous Yui) and tell them that being gay is wrong... my man you are in the wrong crowd.
At least he has the confidence to be homophobic straight to Neung and Aneung's faces next week with the "A lesbian novel?!?!"
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spotaus Ā· 6 months ago
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Thinking about Orchid and her connection to my take on Gender (because this was meant to be about her and the Crew but it just devolved into a character analysis kinda??? More trauma-dumping maybe???) This is very much an oc/personal rant so feel free to ignore it šŸ«”
So, Orchid started off as a character I didn't really think much of (hear me out this is going to be relevant) because I wanted to add a 'girl' character but didn't know what to *do* with her, y'know? She was always going to be the strongest one there, she had the odds stacked in her favor with her parents. She was always going to be the gloomy side-character to match Reset's energy. But I think she's gone through every stage of Generic Woman I could possibly find.
At first she was angry and abrasive (think Fell!Sans) where every other word was a curse and she was likely to throw the first punch then laugh as she kicks her enemy while they're down. This was when Reset was a cartoonishly self-centered villain whose goal was simply to prove others wrong. Then Orchid became a sort of sisterly figure. This was short-lived, but she was the one comforting people who Reset would torment, but would ultimately follow his orders, because at this point he was actually a danger and sadistic. And then there was the phase where the story mellowed out and she became the token Goth Girl who, yes she was strong, but was heavy on the 'whatever' energy. Then there was her Era of deep self-loathing and anxiety about her worth that held her back and made her a much more timid and meek character who would only lash out on occasion.
Now, Orchid is the best of those iterations I've written yet. She's calm, level-headed, and a natural leader. Her father raised those traits into her. But she's very reactive, and can be silly, and when she's comfortable it's likely that air of importance transforms into something more comfortable and familiar. She laughs loudly and grins wide, she likes loud video-games but loves to read in the quiet. She's extremely disciplined, and normally no one can get through her tough exterior besides her best friend, Reset. She does what she does for her own enjoyment, sure, but she's thought of every angle and makes her choice to help Reset and control the others with her whole chest. She still worries she won't live up to her invisible expectations, and that and her loyalty are her two driving forces.
I know that Orchid is important to me because she's the longest-running female oc I've had. I have a rough relationship with womanhood/girlhood and I know looking back that Orchid recieved every ounce of my distaste for being a woman that I could shovel into her. That never made her less of a character, she was actually always one of my favorites, and rarely was she a 'punching bag oc'. I just... projected onto her a lot. And she's a good sign of how I've learned who I am. I've decided that my own femininity is something I could live without. I'd rather not associate myself with it, and I'd like to leave it in my past, focusing on a future where I'm not tied down with any gender roles or expectations. That won't happen, but I've come to terms with it myself. Orchid though? I figured out through her that I don't have to hate women characters. My own distaste for my circumstances doesn't mean I have to push it onto my characters (on God I've never expressed anything rude to actual people, that'd be rude as hell and uncalled for, but I have a bad habit of disliking fictional women in media). So, Orchid is a well-roubded character finally. She has motivations abd goals and a *lot* more depth than I ever expected her to. She's happy with being a woman, she's content. She's not treated differently for it in unfair ways by those she cares about, so she doesn't mind it. She likes to wear pretty outfits and lets Reset add bows to her ribbons. She doesn't let being a woman hold her back in the slightest.
So, yeah. Orchid is one of my babies. If I ever leave this Fandom behind for good, she's one that's coming with (Ichor, Orchid, and Pretender all have human designs I can use elsewhere lol-) but in the meantime I'll just rotate her around in my brain for a while longer.
If I'm right, she's been with me for nearly 5-6 years and I went through a *lot* with her as an outlet. So, she's kinda just like an old stuffed animal. A lil ripped, matted fur, maybe a stain or two, but there's a story there and that makes it important beyond belief.
#spotatalk#i'm just gonna drop this in the queue I guess?#but I'm writing this on the last day of june so....#whenever this rolls around will be a jumpscare abd a half I guess?#I think honestly I coukd do a full breakdown of the Crew and why they're all expressions of me but like#quick summary is#Reset: Wants approval from people but mostly clings to the past. is afraid of losing his brother and acts on it to bring him back. i#<- I lack that conviction to do whatever you have to to get your way. i worry my brother and I have a weird gap between us we wont repair#Orchid: Uhhh woman. lots of pressure that she had at one time that's now no being pressed but she still tries to live up to it also.#<- I don't like the pressure of being a woman. also gifted-kid who cannot move past the pressures imposed to be 'perfect' and it's screwed#Stereo: Pulled into a situation he doesn't want to be in initially. it's bad for him but he likes the people so he decides to stay#<- I see the good in people. even when they hurt others around me. I was a bystander often and should've left the situations. paralelling.#Monochrome: Afraid. No purpose or preperation in life. soneone offers to guide him and he takes that offer because it's better than home.#<- Kinda self-explanitory but I've got little direction and feel lost a lot of the time. If I'm given a path I usually walk it no hesitation#and... for fun let's do some others!#Haphazard: Cleaning up after others since childhood. he's never really gotten a break and sees any sort of mess as an enemy#-> He's fixing rifts in universes I gotta patch relationships. there's so much conflict and I'm always so overwhelmed by it#Lost: He's got amnesia. no clue where he is. where he's from. who you are. who he is. he'll know when he gets there. he's sure.#-> I've been hsving minor issues with my memory for years. i coukd be forgetful but sometimes it just escapes me and that's spooky#Teddy: Isolated in her universe for years. she self-mutilated until she liked herself. when she finally met people she compulsively lied#-> Much more extreme version of how isolated I sonetines feel. hobbies can't replace human interaction but it's hard#oh and Ichor: God who loves mortals but cannot seem to find ones who will prove hin right for his trust and care#<- I've got a big heart. i express it often but the sentinent is scoffed off a lot. I get beat down about it and just keep moving forward#Pretender: Knows who he is. however the world doesn't like it much so he acts how they expect him to or isolates away#<- I still present femme when I'm nb/agender. i bend and break to people's perception of me. if I can't solve something I run.#okay I feel more insane than when ai started but these stupid skeletons have helped me through so many mental health problems it's only a#little bit funny šŸ™
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nobodysdaydreams Ā· 5 months ago
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Giving a complicated tragic childhood backstory to your favorite character is all fun and games, until you realize you need to account for how old all the other adult characters would have been at the time and realize that scenes that would work perfectly if one character was twenty three and the other was fourteen stop working when you need other characters who are played by adult actors clearly younger than they are to be in college at the same time so your story beats line up thematically.
#Don't worry. I made an excel document for this over a year ago#Was that unhinged? Yeah. But this is harder than you think it is#In unrelated news it is now reasonable to have a child in your 20s 30s or 40s depending on when the plot needs the child#Also people in their early 20s can be in grad school have already established careers and adopt children now. I've declared it.#Also: Hollywood stop trying to trick me into believing women in their 30s are the same age as men in their 50s. It's never gonna work.#I'm fighting for my life to make these age gaps normal even on a platonic level#Don't worry I aged the girls up and the boys down#But still this is a bit ridiculous#If you use the actors' ages it doesn't work. Garrison's actress is 16 years younger than Curtain. Why?#I mean I like the casting. But SQ is a teenager. We know Curtain has had his evil plans at least since SQ was born and lost his bio dad#and if the Whisperer is Garrison's invention that means she and Curtain were working together when SQ was born#If SQ in the show is 16 (the actor was older I believe) and Garrison is 37 (that's how old the actress is now she was younger at time)#That means Garrison was only 21 and Curtain was well into his 30s. And that's after you age SQ down and Garrison up for the calculations#So Garrison was likely (according to the shows' casting) even younger than that which begs the question what was Curtain doing?#Was he spending his 30s lurking around college campuses and high schools looking for a kid whose inventions he could steal?#What in the Marcus Cutter is that about?#All these jokes about Garrison being SQ's uninvolved divorced stepmom but nah she's really his estranged big sister#also this is very frustrating because the irl age gap between the actress who plays Number Two and Tony Hale only 7 years#but they're the ones for whom a 16 year age gap would have actually made sense because he adopts her in the books!#but now since Garrison is clearly so much younger than Number Two Curtain and Benedict I have to deal with this#(Don't worry I figured it out and made the age gaps normal. You just now have to believe Number Two is only a year older than Garrison)#It was the stress of living with her family that aged her and Garrison just looks naturally super young that's what we're going with.#And don't get me wrong:#I do like the actresses and actors they casted they're great but sometimes I google the ages and I'm like oh you cannot be serious#But we've (more or less) figured it out#Rant over#writing#writing struggles#tmbs
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lilworms Ā· 2 months ago
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so
#last night was really so so so fun and it was super hard to get myself to go out? like#in the sense of I really wanted to because I knew it would be fun but I also knew my anxiety was eating me alive#and it would be an obstacle getting through that without alcohol and I need to be ā€¦ careful#but I got fun drunk and didnā€™t have too bad of a hangover and didnā€™t feel super anxious once we got out :#and a different friend wants to make plans for tonight but I am really bad at making plans in advance because sometimes I physically canā€™t#do things after work bc tired bc neuro disorder and itā€™s frustrating to my friend with severe control issues#bc she needs to make specific plans like a week out and Iā€™m like erm babe I canā€™t like#do that? and then if I donā€™t feel well day of and need to be home she gets (rightfully) frustrated because Iā€™m bailing but itā€™s#challenging. and you donā€™t understand unless you live with it.#and itā€™s frustrating for us both. I donā€™t want her to think I donā€™t value her because I do and I force myself out often enough bc I#genuinely feel bad. but itā€™s so fucking hard sometimes . she also lives sort of far so going from work and having#to drive an hour to her place to then go somewhere and be out like#Iā€™m spent before I even get there#friend I saw last night and I donā€™t talk consistently but when we do itā€™s always the same vibe and so fun and we just catch up about life#I feel like when I see my other friends they have things to always talk about because theyā€™re in a discord call almost every night#I donā€™t have the energy!!!!!!!!!! like Iā€™m so sorry thatā€™s so much for me#idk she isnā€™t answering me now but if she wants to do something I need to know in the next hr bc if not Iā€™m literally going to bed#I love her but thereā€™s a disconnect between us rn and I donā€™t know how to mend that gap#but I do love her friendship so Iā€™m just like. sigh#idk it would be different if she was closer and I know that#I hope getting back on medication helps get me being more social again. Iā€™m just so tired this week that speaking is hard lol
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yepmimix Ā· 3 months ago
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keepthemacramesecret Ā· 4 months ago
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u ever think about Out Of Paradise/The Last Word (Ernest William Hornung, 1904/5)
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wlwgang Ā· 12 days ago
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Actually Iā€™m glad Iā€™m a bit late to the party on Big Thief because if I had heard Mythological Beauty at 16 my head wouldā€™ve exploded clean off
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akhaste Ā· 1 year ago
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Lee Yoon - Song of the Bandits Sketchs/ Studies 1920's & 1890's
Bonus: 1920's, but without the 'stache
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catgirltoes Ā· 9 months ago
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Gotta be honest the constant objectification of women's bodies is a bit tiring sometimes.
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returnofismasm Ā· 1 year ago
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Pillars of Eternity folks:
In case we find out tomorrow, where in the timeline do you think Avowed will be set?
My thought is concurrent with Deadfire, to avoid having to deal with any consequences from Deadfire's endgame, though I suppose the plot of Avowed could be the result of Deadfire's ending.
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musical-chick-13 Ā· 1 year ago
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"This show is SO good, you should watch it!!"
I gotta be honest. If I look at a character list on Wikipedia and get five characters down without seeing a single woman, it's probably not for me.
#I have no patience for 'there is exactly one woman in the main/supporting cast' anymore#unless the writing is INCREDIBLE and the themes are explored with a type of depth and nuance I can't get anywhere else (like shiki)#(daily media plug for shiki)#then I just. probably will not vibe with it. if there are no women. (also shiki DOES have interesting female characters in it)#and this isn't to say that like. things involving men or talking about men or that have a male protagonist are Not Worth#My Time that is NOT what I'm saying at all. I just want like. several women. who show up and affect the story. like LITERALLY that is all I#am asking for. I feel like that's just. the bare minimum. but alas.#mel screams about fictional ladies again#there are plenty of things that are male-character-focused that I enjoy and even genuinely think are good! but I do want people to#ask themselves why they aren't willing to go to bat for media that DOES have more women in the cast than men.#(I mean. the answer is misogyny. but I want people to be. aware of that. and evaluate accordingly)#(evaluate meaning 'acknowledge I have some biases I need to continue deconstructing' not 'drop interest in everything tumblr#user musical-chick-13 personally doesn't like')#I feel like so many times we get trapped in this space between overcorrection via 'don't like ANYTHING that's pRoBLeMaTiC in ANY way'#and people taking the 'it's fiction it's not that deep' to the conclusion of 'because I cannot actually hurt fictional characters because#they're not real that means I am incapable of hurting irl people when they talk about those characters'#like there is. nuance here. there is a middle ground. and most people have NO interest in finding it lmao#and like...if you carry your biases from irl (which EVERYONE HAS. INCLUDING ME. COURTESY OF LIVING IN A PREJUDICED SOCIETY.) into a#direct and one-to-one evaluation of stories or characters that allow you to exercise those biased ideas. then that reinforces those biases#like. no hating...for example every anime lady isn't the same as structural misogyny like the pay gap or anti-women violence#but if you automatically associate the idea of 'female character' with 'lesser-than' it strengthens the already-present societal idea that#women are not as important or dynamic or worthy of support and attention as their male peers. if you are willing to see every (white)#fictional man as having interiority and depth but struggle to see that in any fictional woman then it adds to the things society is already#telling us about women. it creates an association of 'women' with 'inferiority' and uh. that's what misogyny is.#it is not the same as misogynistic crimes against irl women but it IS a reflection of the rhetoric and societal impulses that lead to them#and even if it's a reflection and not the actual thing. it's still important to break down and examine and reevaluate because#if we don't examine our OWN biases. then even if we tear down the greater oppressive structure we'll just end up building it back up again#no your thousands of words of m/m fanfiction or liking late 2000s shonen anime isn't responsible for misogyny nor are these things#inherently misogynistic. I just want like. some acknowledgement that something being 'for fun' doesn't automatically mean that bias/#prejudice is nowhere to be found
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ningningkittie Ā· 8 months ago
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šŸ¦ØšŸ’­
#even if idk what's going on#it FEELS like i've lost him as a friend. even if he said that like oh you're my friend or whatever. it doesnt feel like it#we havent talked as often lately (not my choice........) anyway and now .. bruh this last week has been AWFUL.#now idek if and how we will talk. like i feel like he doesnt want me annoying him. so i cant even use sending pics of my cat or asking him#random things as an excuse to talk because like... i feel awkward#i've gone from feeling 90% comfortable with him to like 10% lmaoooo#i just feel like he is bothered by me and that i annoy him and i feel stupid and awkward talking to him#so like.....now when idek if we are friends or how we talk#i cant suddenly be like hiiiiii the rain reminded me of you hiihihihihi#not talking to him even a little makes me miserable#but he isnt replying and i dont know what is going on with any of it with him and me so idk#also ://#i cant help but freak out bc of him not following me anymore bc that means that there will be MORE distance between us#i will become even less and less present in his life and world. he will start forgetting me more and more. he will realize that the world#without me is better!!!! he will spend more time andbe more attentive towards everyone else and realize that not having me close is much#better. and that his life is happier and better without me close by T-T plus it's...#i cant lie... it makes me jealous that he had favorite blogs and mutuals who arent me šŸ˜­šŸ˜­#and all of them are better than me in every aspect...... šŸ˜­#this will only make the gap between us bigger and he will forget about me!!!!!!!! šŸ„²#little by little he is reducing the amount of me in his life and since it'll be better he'll keep going until im out of it completely#im gonna die just thinking about it bc i know i know that i dont bringANYTHING good into ppl's lives and im just lucky that it lasts at all
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