#we know that many breeds
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i did it!
i finished Folded at the Edges!!
i had to kill a few of my darlings along the way because i couldn't fit those scenes but
it's done!
it will be posted by or on Nov 20th!
for anyone curious, it's a post-finale heaven fic in Dean Junior's POV, just over 47k words, and introspective and thinky with a bunch of my worldbuilding thoughts about the afterlife in SPN snuck in in the form of plot.
it guest-stars as many side characters as i could sneak in without making myself too crazy, but the focus is on DJ getting to know more about his father, his family and family legacy, and most especially his father's relationship with his brother.
#phyn vs. writing#it's outsider POV wincest with a whole heaping spoonful of 'isn't the afterlife in SPN super fucked up?'#'let's fix that'#it's also 'do we ever really know our parents' and 'family secrets breed pain'#we're shoving so many themes into this baby#also of course Baby is there#the impala gets to go to heaven#folded at the edges
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subaru count while waiting for the bus while my phone is almost dead: 23 or possibly 24 i didn't get a good look at some and also i have the memory of a goldfish. no offense to goldfish
#not as many as i was expecting honestly i saw a lot more toyotas#i feel like i'm destined to be a subaru owner idk maybe its the lesbianism but i think they're neat#<- guy who does not know anything at all about the breeds of car#the car i'm actually most likely to get at this point is my brothers very wealthy in laws used lexus ☠️ would that be evil#he said it would cost about 8k but they might give me a discount. and not to sound entitled but these people have MANY millions of dollars#so i KNOW they would not even notice 8k and i'm kind of salty about this. but whatever#hes literally a retired superior court judge of orange county and their family fund is possibly in the billions#they have a goddamn house in fucking hawaii that they dont even rent out when theyre not there it just is empty#and another house on a manmade island in socal 😭 who fucking does that#the guy is also a pastor because of course he fucking is. theyre nice people but what a totally insane way to live and i'm sorry but it is#evil to own a house in hawaii as a white person and then just leave it empty most of the time.#they paid off my brothers $50k+ in student loans when he got engaged also#they also feel bad for me because of my insane mother and dead father situation#so yeah if they were like we are giving you this 2013 lexus with less than 90k miles on it i would be like awesome thank you! and would not#feel bad about that even a little bit. considering 8k is almost half of what my current yearly income is set to be#it wont stay that way because i have to get a second job in order to live 🥰 so cool how capitalism works#me
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I’ve acquired two aquatic additions!! A beta named Crunchwrap Supreme, and a mystery snail named Queso! I’ve always loved fish and have wanted a beta for years and have finally “dipped my toes in the water” so to speak.
#I know fishblr is a thing#but it scares me to tag it lololol#not dogs#did I get orange/reddish animals to match my current pet aesthetic?#maybe#my borzoi breeding partner is an avid fish keeper and has been for many years#and when I found this out I immediately demanded she teach me everything#I don’t trust the internet#and didn’t feel confident about figuring it all out on my own#I didn’t know much but I knew it’s not as simple as throw a fish in a tank of water#so#here we are#I’ve been working on getting it cycled since Jan!#it was actually cycled a month ago but
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I feel like I have more dog than cat vibes but I can't tell for sure.
I mean yeah, your kinfa right
But i can just as easily see you as an old and wise feline as i can seeing you as an old and wise canine
You dont have the energeticness of a pup, or the mischeviousnesw of a kitten eithwr
So im thinking just, like,
I had the words -
Oh
You have the loyality of a dog yeah, but the calmness of an older one
Your quite calm and easy to talk with
So yeah, just a medoum aged doggo
#disregarding my genoune dislike of caninea from past experiences youd be like#a german shepard#or like an emotional support dog (?)#if that makws sense#i font know many dog breeds because i dont look up them but you#font seem like a dalmation pomerianian pit bull chiuhaha#and uh#whatevwer the zcraggily mess of my friends dog is#you cpuld be a chiuahaha but only one type from what ive aeen#the calm not angy ones#or like#i dont remwmber his exact breed but i had a dog named buddy who was quire fluffy and calm#he made lil me so happy because he would just sit there#with bright orange color on and jjst let me pwt him and talk#i always petted him when we left#he ended up getting with a sausage dog#her name was dixie cuz she was very stupid#he had a pup too that looked almost just like him#petted that lil bud too all the time when i was a prwteen#whatwver dog breed that was
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So I'm really not the biggest fan of tbs, considering they're really not what Im wanting for my next horse but oof - my coach has the sweetest and chillest (with me at least lmao) 3yro filly by lucky street (AUS) currently racing and depending on when she's retired from the track, I might actually consider buying her. She's such an angel with me and is super switched on and inquisitive about everything.
#like - thoroughbreds arent my fav breed by virtue of many just not clicking with me hut she's 100% different#ngl i was looking into more purpose bred breeds for dressage/we but she's honestly spun my entire worldview around#😭 ive only ever felt like this with beau and at least i know what kind of training and background she's come from compared to him#arden's thoughts
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sometimes I wonder if I should take a gender studies class just so I can bitch every day about how an imaginary boyfriend is often seen as a requirement for a woman to feel safe enough to have fun at a club, or the idea that an imaginary person with a fake “claim” over me has more influence over predatory men than my own voice saying “No, I’m not interested, get lost”
#venting#hnnnnng the double standard is really really making my teeth hurt recently#(in that I’m grinding my jaw at the mere thought of this particular breed of injustice)#I honestly miss going out with my friends. I miss going to bars and clubs and enjoying the night#but I wanna go with my friends and leave my boyfriend at home for once#he gets to go out and enjoy himself all the time with his friends and they never even have to deal with unwanted flirtation#meanwhile I go out in a tshirt and jeans and get fucking catcalled or flirted with just fucking getting groceries#and it’s not a narrative on beauty or anything. it’s about men’s perception of women#specifically predatory men and men who don’t realize they’re BEING predatory#perhaps it’s because I’ve been going to this fucking gamer school for far too long#and I’ve interacted with so many socially inept/incel men from there#who don’t know what no means or dont take women seriously when they do say no#or they literally cannot read between the lines of a woman politely declining their advances#‘but she was being so nice to me’ yeah bc if she wasn’t you��d either call her a bitch or try to force her anyway#anyway. I’m angry#im tired of living in fear of morons#I’m tired of not being able to go out on a Tuesday night and just walk the town with my friends#specifically my femme friends#we should be at the club!! instead we’re trying to make sure the group is like a school of fish so we’re less of a target#and like. I could talk about this on twt or reddit but. cmon. let’s be real here#MelloMoans#really does feel like we’re going backwards when it comes to gender equality and feminism#especially with the influx of the whole sigma male/high value male bullshit#I understand how it came to be I really do but that plus the whole pick me girl thing is just another toxic view of gender identity#and all it has resulted in on both sides is a wider degree of separation between the genders#therefore allowing both extremes to dehumanize every one that doesn’t identify as sigma male or not like other girls YET AGAIN#(and therefore also opens up the door for dehumanizing lgbtq+ folks but. let’s be real. that hasn’t really gone away yet :/
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usamerican: "Stop killing mosquitos they're important for the enviroment"
the entirety of south america having an increased surge in dengue, zika and chikungunya since summer arrived: "k."
#gringos dni#jk but still#i think a lot of usamericans underestimate how many deadly bugs we have to deal with in a daily basis#we Are allowed to prevent them from breeding near urban spaces for our own safety#these diseases actually kill if you didn't know#i had dengue once and i almost got close to death from high fever :thumbsup:#also. you are most definitely allowed to hate bugs even if they're important for the ecosystem#don't have you head so high up your ass to deny the fact thousands of people in poor living conditions have to deal with all this#joowee's chattering
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constantly being reminded that the standard acknowledge-enough formula for getting guard/guardian dogs to stop barking does not work on many other dogs
#what we do with my family's two large guardian breed dogs is that you let them alery- acknowledge what they've alerted to#I.e. if they're barking bc a car door slammed outside you say ''thank you. I heard it''- and then you tell them ''alright that's enough''#it usually works pretty well bc what they need to know is that someone else will take care of what they perceive as a threat.#if they know you're Aware of it (and yes they can understand this) they'll relax a bit#however I forget that the dogs I've grown up with and that my family has right now are... extremely conversational#we talk to them like people basically. I say please and thank you to them and genuinely they understand me.#they're SUPER in tune to vocal commands/being spoken to in any context.#many other dogs are... not. my brother's dachshund is very well trained but he does Not stop barking when I#instinctively say ''thanks I heard it that's enough'' it just doesn't work on him sjdskfnskfbskfnsk#Lu rambles
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Incorrect breed guesses, Cat edition:
Everyone thinks Rebel is a Bengal or Bengal cross. They don't believe me when I say she is your typical cat. Shorthair variety, brown spotted tabby in color. Her spots look nothing like Bengal spots.
She doesn't even have a breed...just a type.
#little known fact but most cats are just...cats.#domestic shorthair and domestic long hair and considered types not breeds#cats are wild#its so cool to see so many coat variations in a species that still largely is breeding without a lot of human interference#i mean its not cool that we have a cat over population problem#but getting a cat from a breeder is pretty rare#most people just rescue or adopt kittens that were oopsies without people intendjngnto have kittens#i know a lot.of.coat variations probably came from human breeding but the fact there is such a variety is cool#coat colors are fun#most wild type genetics run back to agouti (typically expressing as brown) so its cool.to.seensoany variations from that.
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Carolina Dogs are so interesting. The person who had the one I posted also has another (altered female). I learnt so much about how they're working to preserve the breed and the history of the breed, what they look for for breeding stock and what they aim for. That dog had an incredible temperament (so sweet, so polite) and was just beautiful to watch. Very interesting stuff.
#my friend was judging and she walks by and looks at me with the carolina dog and says 'dont be adding more dogs to your list'#like 😭 i know i know i dont want a carolina dog#but it makes me think about how little we are doing to preserve our breed#it makes me sad#a lot of the beauces i see are not... what they should be.#theyre becoming so popular that its becoming a like... oh god our breed is going to be ruined#it doesn't help that a lot of people /in the breed/ dont know the breeds history or have a solid idea of what theyre breeding for#or theyre breeding for faults#ugh. it depresses me#i dont know if i want to breed beauces.. but the more i learn the more i realise i want to breed in the future#there are so many breeds that are struggling. so many breeds where the fanciers are 'ageing out'#that still haunts me. 'my last litter'. 'my last collie'.#anyway. this to say. if youre interested in a rare breed. heres your sign to reach out lol
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instagram is wacky i just saw someone comment that banning ear cropping would just lead to ppl importing dogs instead, or doing it "in their kitchen with scissors and baking soda".. i dont think everyone is as out of their minds as you are dear social media user. also as if several countries didnt already make that change years, if not decades ago in a lot of cases. its literally fine.
#im just laughing at how ridiculous and frankly absurd that argument is#ear cropping has been illegal in finland since 1996 for reference. and also is in most of europe.#personally its one of those things i wouldnt do even if i was in a position where i could#all it is is cosmetics and i find that unnecessary + i dont think it looks that nice in the end anyway so whats the point of#going through an entire procedure. unnecessary like i said#but im not saying if u cropped ur dog's ears ur a horrible person lol thats a bit far fetched#its like. on an individual scale? not my problem what u do#but overall i think the practice would be better off left behind in countries like the us where its still commonplace#though of course for this to work breed standards would need to change as well#which imo should in fact be done lol#but we all know many people would throw a fit about all that#also importing dogs just so that they would have cropped ears??? yea right#the very definition of ''more trouble than its worth''#anyway rant/ramble over. dont take it too seriously im just out here spilling out my thoughts#mine
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Not to mention that while all of the above is happening, there is also a protest going on outside of the party lead by people who are gluten intolerant, shouting angrily about how they know you’re eating cake and that since cake is so upsetting to them then that means it should be equally as upsetting to every single person who has ever existed and if cake isn’t upsetting to you then that makes you a bad person.
And not only are you a bad person for making a homemade cake, but everyone there is bad and even the place that you’re having the party at is bad and it should be burned down and destroyed completely because sometimes there are people who like cake in it.
And you’re like “Hey uh… there’s actually very clear labels on every single food item in here, and more than plenty of delicious gluten free options, and absolutely no cross contamination! It’s really a very good party venue for that exact reason, because people work hard to make sure it can be customised for everyone! At other venues in the past it was a lot harder to keep the gluten and gluten free foods separated, but if you just read the ingredients you can get all of the foods you want without ever even seeing my homemade cake that I worked so hard on! We even have gluten free cake specifically!”
And instead of responding in any normal way they put your address on the Internet and call your boss and try to get you fired for baking a cake (which they lie about on the internet and to your boss and insist that you were intentionally poisoning people’s food.)
Also sometimes, they convince really young kids who may or may not be gluten sensitive to sneak into the party under the guise of fighting for justice and those kids are told that everyone in the party is out to hurt them, and the only way they can be safe is to pretend to be friendly but actually serve everyone cookies with needles baked into them, but bringing that up makes the whole metaphor fall apart doesn’t it?
current fan creation landscape is kinda like if you went to a party with a homemade cake and everyone takes a slice and silently thumbs up at you with no attempt to start a conversation except for occasionally some guy sits in the corner with a tape recorder critiquing the cake as though he was a restaurant critic and another guy is handing the cake to an uber driver like "yeah i need you to find a restaurant that makes cake like this so i can have more of it" and the only person that's talked to you in 30 minutes is a very sweet little guy who was like "hey i liked your cake" and then ran away apologizing for bothering you the moment you said thank you.
#yes this is about antis#and purity culture#was it obvious?#I know the needle cookie thing may not have been done by an anti but given that so many antis celebrated it as a just and righteous act#they don’t get to just shove it under a rug and say nuh uh that wasn’t us like so many peeps seem to let them#I really miss united fandom culture#I miss old tumblr#i miss how we celebrated each other and how if you were in a fandom it didn’t matter what you shipped or the quality of your art or fics#you were a part of that fandom and we all knew each other and respected each other#can that just come back instead of empty false righteousness and being to afraid to interact#instead of the entitlement and greed that ai shit has seemed to breed#and instead of the thought policing fanpol purity bullshit which is just poorly disguised homophobia
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I think it's a common misconception that domesticating animals is somewhat like enslaving them. It really is more of a symbiotic relationship. No wild animal would have willingly put up with early humans if they didn't get something out of it. Wolves wouldn't have stayed with us and become dogs if they weren't getting food and safety out of it. Many large herbivores that are now domesticated could and would have easily trampled their early human captors or broken their enclosures open if they didn't have a reason to stay. Sometimes individual animals still do if we don't give them what they need.
The animals that have stayed with us for thousands of years have evolved to cooperate with us better. Dogs have additional facial muscles around their eyes that wolves lack in order to mimic human facial expressions. Sheep grow their wool perpetually while their wild counterparts don't because a bigger fleece means they're more likely to be allowed to breed and be kept around. Domestic dairy cows produce much more milk than wild bovine species and domestic hens lay more eggs. Do you know how energy costly producing eggs or milk is for an animal? It's pretty intense! They wouldn't be able to do that if we hadn't given them the food and safety from predators and the elements to.
And we really need to show these animals respect and gratitude for what they give us by taking excellent care of them. They gave up a lot to be with us, often including the means to take care of themselves in the wild. That's a huge reason why I'm not against using animal products, but I hate factory farming. They are still living, breathing creatures with needs and feelings. They deserve a comfortable life and, when the time comes, a humane death.
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Just remembered them randomly but. Silly AU explanation for Francis and BonBon's whole deal is that (debatably) Francis has a missing hand/prosthetic and BonBon is just Really Short
#not art 😱#the silly au#francis#bon bon#ok no guys i have to be honest. i really don't know if i wanna keep bon bon's name as. bon bon#bc we already have a bonnie! who is commonly called “bon” as a nickname!!!#but also!!! there's only so many B names i think can fit these characters so 😐#eh whatever. anyway#working idea is that bon bon and bonnet are just a really small breed of rabbits. them dwarf breeds or smth#(also side acknowledgement that the designs do partially follow animal sizes while sticking closer to human heights)#(ie the bears being taller than the others and the chickens being a lot shorter than the others. but its not like--#zootopia type shit where they're accurately sized. i just apply the animal sizes to natural human heights like 6'0 or 4'0)#was gonna say smth like “back on topic again” but then i realized thats it. i've said everything. so.
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behold
my wolf
#wolves vs dogs#size difference#I know I made a joke with my own dog but like#he is literally a wolf#technically speaking#we've just perfected the act of breeding so well that we've created so many wolves that don't look like wolves at all#and it's fascinating#anyways my wolf is the best boy#he is playing with a moth as we speak#truly a fearsome predator#he only weighs 11 pounds#I think a wild wolf's head is bigger than he is
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the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.
when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."
but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.
now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.
the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.
but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."
the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.
but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?
because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!
and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.
#spilled ink#writeblr#warm up#this is an incredibly difficult idea to express#but i basically keep watching the same timelooped interaction:#someone makes tradwife content where she's like ''i think it's SO sad when ppl don't have kids EW''#and then the response is ''... go fuck yourself? i think ur life is miserable and bad ?"#and instead of being like ''oh we are all under capitalism huh''#the response is like ''you CANT say that. she made a CHOICE. she is ALLOWED to have KIDS and be HAPPY#unlike YOU who is UNHAPPY bc you don't have KIDS.''#like .... these are people who will throw the first stone. and then when you lob one back#they ask why you're so violent. they tell you that you're a bad activist.#and you're like. PARDON????? you implied being a woman meant i need to submit to my husband???#and they're like - well it's just my belief. so what if i'm invalidating your entire identity.
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