#we had no classes together but i still ended up crushing on him lol

[strayloveletter]

also today is like a day for crushes bc this morning i saw the guy i had a crush on freshman year at a mf denny’s and me being as slick as i am just stared at him for like 4 seconds

[fqirysim]

untitled--

genre(s): angst, some fluff at the end, exes to best friends to lovers, highschool au, lowercase intended, lots of pov changes

requested: nope !

pairing(s): yang jungwon x reader, ft. yuna (itzy), and intak (p1h)

word count: 7.2k (my longest fic yet ! ) 

warning(s): cursing, underage drinking, a tiny bit of infidelity 

synopsis: you had been in love with yang jungwon since the day you met him. 

note: lowercase is intended, lots of pov changes! (read carefully so you don’t get confused lol). this took me a year to make PLEASE don't judge too harshly i put my heart and soul into this 😭. took me a year to make but could not come up with a title for the life of me, hence why it is called untitled, silly silly me. this was really fun to make though and although it took me a while to make, i'm very proud of it. lmk if you want to be added to my taglist and i will gladly do so !! special thanks to my bestie abby and my bf dean for proofreading love you both <3333

—------

you were certain this was the end of your friendship with jungwon. again. but this time you knew it would be permanent.

he was the boy who lived next door. growing up, you had always admired him from afar. the class president who everyone, including the upperclassmen, seemed to get along with.  

you had liked him until freshman year, when you got tired of pining over someone who didn’t seem to hold any interest in you. as comical as it seems, that was around the time that he had started to take an interest in you. 

and so he courted you, bringing you your favorite drink, walking you home, even coming over for dinner and hanging out at your house. this helped blossom a friendship that no one saw coming, and it wasn’t long until people started to wonder if you two were an item. 

it took two months for jungwon to muster up the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend. 

you were sure you were over your crush on him, that it was just a silly childhood crush. but as you hung out with him more and more, you couldn’t help but fall for him all over again. of course you said yes, because who wouldn’t say yes to the pretty starry-eyed boy standing before you?

jungwon was a nice boyfriend; going on dates quite often, never fought, and he would buy you flowers without being asked.. maybe the latter was why the whirlwind relationship only lasted five months. 

you remember the day so vividly, sitting on the bench at your favorite park; the same park where jungwon had asked you to be his, and here he was, asking you to break up.

 it seemed poetic in a kind of way, starting as his, and leaving as no one’s.

“i’m sorry. i’ve just lost romantic feelings,” jungwon stated, staring down at the grass as a breeze of wind came, the blades of grass swaying slightly. “it’s just that we’ve both been so busy with other things, and i guess we kinda just like, drifted apart because of it.”

“yeah, i think so too,” you replied nonchalantly, ignoring the slight sting in your heart. 

his head snapped up, your eyes finally meeting his, “wait, actually? you’re not lying?” the sound of relief in his voice made your heart feel like it was being squeezed.

“do you want to get rid of me that bad?” you instead teased with a grin. 

“no!” he exclaimed with wide eyes. “i still wanna be friends with you. i might not like you romantically anymore, but i don’t wanna like, lose the friendship we have, you know?”

“yeah,” you replied, “we can still be friends.”

and you two meant it. there were no tears, and no broken hearts (that you would like to admit). it was just a simple case of the right person and the wrong time, and as the years continued, you tried to convince yourself that it was just nothing. that jungwon was not your “right” anything- he was just your best friend, nothing more, nothing less. 

you were almost successful. until your last year of high school approached. 

you and jungwon kept your word, you stayed friends. always being seen together; walking to class, walking home, studying in the library, eating lunch in the cafeteria. 

people still believed you were together, and you always had to correct them, because no you and jungwon were no longer together and no you were not a thing.

they never believed you, though. 

there was always a small part of you that wanted to say yes when someone would ask. that you and jungwon were a thing and that he was yours and you were his. but you never did, callingyourself crazy for even thinking of doing so. 

you found yourself doing it again as yuna had asked you earlier in the week. 

yuna was the new girl this year, having transferred from jyp high. from what you heard, she was nice, smart, and she was gorgeous. you were never one to put yourself down, but you couldn’t say that you didn’t feel insecure standing next to her. 

“no, jungwon and i are not dating,” you smiled politely. it was almost like a script at this point. “we’re just good friends.”

“that’s good to hear,” yuna smiled, her eyes sparkling. “i just wanted to ask him out, but i wasn’t going to if you had a thing!”

“oh, you’re thinking of confessing to him?” you questioned. there was that little part of you again. the part that always said no! tell them you’re a thing! tell them to not do it!

“yeah, he’s in a bunch of my classes. he’s super smart and polite and he always knows how to make me laugh. and he has such pretty eyes,” she sighed dreamily as her mouth formed into a lovesick smile. 

“well, he has that effect on people,” you grinned. 

i would know, you thought.

 “i say go for it! he’s not particularly interested in anyone, you have a good chance.”

“you really think so?” she asked, eyes wide. 

god, i hope not, you thought. as shitty as it was, you didn’t want jungwon to move on. you felt sick at the thought of him being with someone else. 

“why not?” you said instead. “he’ll be at the library after school today studying, i’m supposed to meet him, but i can just tell him something came up.” 

“oh my god, you’re the best!” she squealed, engulfing you in a hug. “thank you thank you thank you.”

“you’re welcome,” you smiled, wrapping your arms around her, ignoring the green monster growing within you.

—----

it had been four days since your conversation with yuna. every time you saw him, you waited for him to bring up the date with baited breath- but he hadn’t said anything. not yet at least.

or maybe yuna simply didn’t ask him on a date. that’s what you were secretly hoping, at least.

it seemed hoping wasn’t enough. on the fifth day jungwon approached you from down the hall with those twinkling eyes and a bright smile you love so much, he seemed more energetic than usual with a little hop in his step. 

“you’re not gonna believe what happened today!” he exclaimed as he reached you at your locker. 

you could believe it. you were the one who hooked yuna up after all. yet you feigned curiosity as you looked at him quizzically, “what is it?”

“yuna asked me on a date! me! of all people! she’s so cool and smart and nice and pretty,” he said with a dreamy look on his face. 

you knew that look. the far away gaze as he thought of her. it was one you would never forget. it’s how he used to look at you. that lovesick grin and those twinkling eyes.

 it had never bothered you before when jungwon had crushes on other girls, because well, that’s all they were. they never escalated into anything more. looking at his lovestruck expression, realization hit that jungwon wasn’t yours anymore. 

you shouldn’t have thought of it that way. you should be happy for him! you should’ve been celebrating with him and cheering him on!  

you couldn’t help the bittersweet smile on your face as you replied, “oh, well that’s nice.”

his smile faltered slightly at your expression, concern slowly forming on his face.  

“are you okay?” he asked. 

“i’m fine, don’t worry,” you said, regaining your composure. “i’m happy for you! and don’t worry about spending less time with me, you’re gonna be a busy guy now! with a girlfriend…”

“okay, she is not my girlfriend. and even if she was, I would never ditch you!” 

“yeah whatever you say, loverboy,” you joked, giving him a playful nudge with your shoulder. 

“no seriously, y/n,” he replied, softly. “are you okay with yuna and i being a thing? i just don’t want it to be weird because you and i used to be a thing, and i know we’re both over that but i just wanted to make sure-,”

“what, me?” you scoffed, cutting the boy off. “what you and i had wasn’t serious, it was just some dumb high school fling.”

even as you spoke those words, you knew they weren’t true. it was more than just a fling. you loved him and maybe you still did. 

silence hung between you, the hallway getting quieter as the remaining students scrambled to their classes, the late bell ringing, leaving you and jungwon in the hallway alone. 

he looked hurt at what you said. you immediately wanted to take it back, to say you didn’t mean it and that he was your first love and you didn’t want him going on that date with yuna. 

“sorry, i shouldn’t have said that,” you muttered, not being able to meet his eyes and instead turning to close your locker. 

“no, you don’t have anything to apologize for,” he replied, as he started to back away, making his way to his class down the hall. “you’re right, it was just a fling, and honestly, it’s so weird to think of us as a couple.” 

it was like your world was falling apart around you as he spoke. did you interpret his hurt expression wrong? maybe this all was one-sided. did he not feel his heart breaking like you did? did he not wonder occasionally (or everyday) how his life would be if you were still together? did he not miss what you had?

maybe there really was nothing between you and jungwon but friendship. 

“yeah, so weird,” you awkwardly smiled, walking to catch up with him. “but you and i, we’re good, right?”

“yep, no worries,” he grinned back. 

“good,” you smiled. “so when’s your date?” 

his eyes brightened ever so slightly as you asked. he started to describe his date– how he was going to take her to the beach and have a picnic and play in the sand. 

you nodded along, your mind wandering off to when jungwon would take you on beach dates, burying him in the sand, splashing him with water and swimming away before he could splash you back. 

you looked over at the boy in question, his starry eyes wide as he talked about his date plans, his smile wide and giddy, his tone as sweet as honey as he talked about her. 

you knew you shouldn’t villainize yuna– she was a nice girl, a very nice one. it wasn’t her fault you were still in love with jungwon, and it surely wasn’t her fault that she liked him. it’s not like you could choose who you could fall in love with. 

you of all people would know. 

so you smiled and nodded along as you walked him to class, listening to him go on and on about his plans. you finally settled with the fact then and there, that jungwon would never be yours again. you had to let go. 

—--------

it has been six months since that day. the day that you had decided to give up. yuna and jungwon have been inseparable since then. 

he kept to his word though; still studying with you after school, showing up when you needed him, hanging out together. sometimes yuna would tag along, which you didn’t mind. she was fun to be around. 

you also didn’t mind being the third wheel when she was around, instead teasing the couple and even offering to take pictures for them. they were a lovely couple and they were seemingly happy– jungwon especially, and that was all that mattered. 

the school year was coming to an end, and seeing as it was your senior year, people were throwing parties almost every weekend. 

you went every once in a while, had some fun, did some underage drinking, even flirted with a couple of people. 

tonight was the party though. 

intak was throwing his first party of the year, and everyone knew his parties were legendary. 

you sat in the uber with jungwon and yuna, anticipating the night before you. you were excited, to say the least. the last time you went to a party was a  month ago, and you were ready to have fun. you even put on your best party outfit for tonight!

you arrived at intak’s house (or more like a mansion), and started to make your way inside until jungwon stopped you. 

“wait! before we go in, i think we should go over some basic safety rules!” jungwon exclaimed. 

you rolled your eyes with a small laugh as you replied, “only you would go over safety rules at a party.” 

“i’m serious, y/n, really bad things could happen,” he shot back with a pointed expression. 

“okay wonie, go ahead, we’re all ears,” yuna smiled supportively.

you ignored the slight heart ache at yuna using your old nickname for jungwon- the one you used when you were together. 

get it together, y/n you thought. letting go, remember?  

you instead smiled and nodded reassuringly at jungwon, who looked over at you to make sure you were paying attention. 

he sighed before continuing, “okay, i won’t be doing any drinking so i can babysit you guys all night. if you need to use the bathroom give your drinks to me so i can watch them. and y/n, if you leave the party at any point, for any reason, please let me know first.”

“sir, yes sir,” you muttered. 

“now let’s go have some fun!” yuna exclaimed, dragging the both of you by the wrists. 

you finally entered the house, where there seemed to be everyone from your school. even kids who graduated last year were in attendance, and as you searched the party for a familiar face that wasn’t jungwon or yuna, intak strolled over, a wide smile on his face. 

“you guys made it!” he shouted over the loud thumping of the music. he was wearing a letterman jacket with a white shirt underneath, and a pair of baggy straight legged jeans. the outfit looked so good on him that you had almost forgotten that you were talking to intak of all people. 

“you look nice, y/n,” he grinned.

you would’ve had a crush on him if he didn’t flirt with every girl he laid eyes on, and it seemed like his victim of the night was you. but damn did he look good right now. 

intak wasn’t a bad guy, he seemed harmless, not like the guys who wouldn’t take no for an answer. he just always flirted, with no intentions of making anything serious. most of the girls he talked to never knew the latter though. 

but you thought it couldn’t hurt, you were here to have fun, and if flirting with intak was the way to do it, then so be it. 

you saw jungwon step forward, about to tell intak to back off and go flirt with someone else, causing you to put your hand on his arm to stop him. 

you also noticed how yuna examined the scene in front of her; jungwon trying to be your knight in shining armor, and you with your hand on his arm to stop him. her eyes narrowed slightly in thought as you dropped your hand and turned to intak. 

“why don’t you get me a drink and then we can talk?” you smiled dazzlingly. you usually reserved smiles like that for when you wanted to flirt and get wasted, and just as usual, it worked like a charm.

“i’ll be right back then,” intak smiled, before making his way through the crowd of bodies in search of a drink for you. 

“really, y/n, intak out of all people?” jungwon questioned, arms crossed. 

“yeah, and what about it?” you replied, feeling slightly annoyed at his tone of voice. he had never acted this way towards you before, but you didn’t like it. it wasn’t his business who you flirted with. he talked to you like you were an idiot and you hated the thought of him looking down on you.  

yuna awkwardly stood between the two of you, not wanting to be in the middle of your fight, but not wanting to go off by herself at a party filled with people she barely knew. 

“‘what about it?’” jungwon mocked your voice in a high pitched tone. “you know how he is, don’t be dumb.”

“dumb? i’m here to have fun, jungwon, not to play third wheel again,” you snapped back. “and why does it matter, you’re not my boyfriend, and you’re not my brother, so it’s really none of your fucking business.”

yuna had been looking back and forth between you and jungwon, watching as you glared at each other, waiting for someone to say something. it was like watching a tennis match. 

at that moment, intak arrived, back with a red solo cup in hand. 

“a drink for the prettiest girl here,” he announced, handing the cup over to you. 

“why thank you love,” you replied with an innocent smile as you looked over at jungwon, still glaring at you, his arms crossed against his chest.

ignoring him, you took a sip of the drink you were given, your face scrunching up at the bitter taste. 

“hey intak, why don’t we go dance?” you asked, reaching for his hand. 

“that sounds like fun,” he replied with a smile of his own before you led him to the dance floor, leaving an enraged jungwon, and a slightly annoyed yuna behind you.

—-----

yuna had seen the way jungwon looked at you. she might have been a bit oblivious at first, but as time went on and she spent more time with the two of you, it became more and more apparent– jungwon had never gotten over you. 

at first yuna thought she could sway him, to get him to fall for her the way he fell for you. but it never worked. he looked at you like you were his own personal angel. no matter where you were, who you were with, how you looked, he was absolutely enraptured by you, and oh, how yuna wished he looked at her like that. 

it had been fifty minutes since your small tussle, and yuna and jungwon sat outside, occupying two pool chairs as he angrily took sips of his water. 

“it’s like she doesn’t even care, she just ran off with him knowing he’ll never want anything serious, knowing he’s gonna lead her on, and i swear when she comes crying to me, i’m gonna tell her ‘i told you’ right to her stupid dumb face,” he rambled, placing his bottle of water harder on the table than he intended to, spilling droplets in the process. 

“well, she’s young and single, and she just wants to have fun baby, there’s nothing wrong with that,” yuna replied. “and she has a point, you’re not her brother or anything, so why do you care so much?”

jungwon  looked up at yuna, not being able to ignore the bitter tone in her voice, “wait, you’re supposed to be on my side.”

“i’m not on anyone’s side, i’m just asking as your girlfriend why you care so much. because honestly, if i didn’t know any better, i would think that you were still in love with her,” yuna sighed, exasperated. 

“i am not in love with her, i like you!” he exclaimed, way faster than he should have. 

yuna wanted to believe him. she wanted to ignore every bit of doubt in her body and believe every lie he fed to her, but she couldn’t. not when she knew you loved him too. it was heartbreaking, really. to watch the person you love pine over someone else. but it was even worse knowing the feelings were reciprocated. 

“don’t lie to me, jungwon,” she deadpanned, feeling her eyes start to water with tears of frustration. “i see the way you look at her, and i know for sure you haven’t gotten over her. you have never once looked at me the way you look at her, and if you like her, just say that. just say that and we can end things here, without having to make this any more heartbreaking than it already is.”

yuna didn’t want to cry. the last thing she wanted to do was cry, but the feelings of anger and embarrassment had overwhelmed her, causing a few traitorous tears to spill. she was angry at herself for letting it get this far, for falling in love with a boy that she knew would never love her back. 

but she was also embarrassed. embarrassed that she had even tried to make an effort, that she had thought she could win him over. 

she wiped her face with the back of her hand, only for more to spill out, a sob fighting for an escape from her quivering lips. 

jungwon raised his hand to wipe the tears away for her, to cup her face and tell her everything would be okay and that he was sorry. but what was he sorry for? sorry for trying to keep you away from intak? or sorry that maybe yuna was right and he did still love you?

just as he opened his mouth to speak, you stumbled out, words slurring and barely able to walk as you stumbled your way over to them. 

“hey guys!” you exclaimed, as a worried intak came rushing out the house behind you. 

“oh god, y/n, are you okay?” jungwon asked, immediately walking over to your side to support your stumbling figure. yuna would have felt bitter over jungwon rushing to your side faster than he had ever run to hers. yet, despite the devil on her shoulder that told her to be petty, she instead felt worried for you. you could barely even stand up straight.

“what the fuck did you do to her?” jungwon asked, throwing an accusatory look at intak.

“nothing dude, i promise! she was the one who wanted to drink, she had like 5 drinks within the span of like, 10 minutes,” intak replied, panicked. “is she going to be okay? does she have a way to get home safely?”

jungwon looked from yuna to you, who was falling asleep just standing there.

“just take her home,” yuna sighed. “i’m not gonna make you choose because we all know who you’d choose every single time.”

“yuna it’s not like that,” jungwon groaned. “listen, i’ll bring her home, and then i’ll come over tomorrow and we can talk this out, okay? i promise.”

“okay, just get her home safe first,” yuna replied. 

you might have been the biggest obstacle in her relationship, but you were still a nice girl, and you had technically done nothing wrong, so yuna had no reason to want to keep you and jungwon apart. you were also wasted as fuck and there was no way you would be able to get home by yourself without something horrible potentially happen to you. 

jungwon grabbed his almost full water bottle from the table he was sitting at, muttering that he would “need it to sober you up”.

he gave yuna one last reassuring smile before he walked away, you on his back as he tried his best to carry you home. 

yuna sighed as she watched you go. she felt like something bad would happen today, something worse than her argument with jungwon, and she wanted nothing else but to go home and cry. 

all she could do was trust jungwon, even if she knew she already lost him, even if she knew she was never a contestant in the first place.

—------

jungwon almost did it. 

he almost carried you all the way home, but his legs felt like they were gonna give out once he reached the park near your house, and he decided then and there that he needed a break. 

he sat you on the playground set, sitting beside you with a huff. 

you were awake by this point, taking long sips of the water bottle jungwon had given you. you wanted to sober up by the time you got home, but it wasn’t really working, with your words still slurring slightly and your mind all dizzy.

the two of you sat in silence as you gazed at the stars and jungwon thought of his argument with yuna. 

maybe she was right. 

even now, as he glanced over at you, studying the stars, his heart skipped a beat and he felt his face warm up. 

“do you remember when you asked me to be your girlfriend in this park?” you chuckled. “we were so young then, it feels like forever ago.”

jungwon was thrown off by the sudden conversation starter, but still smiled, “yeah, i remember it very well. i felt like i was gonna throw up because i was so nervous.”

you turned your head to look at him and giggled as his smile grew wider. 

“what, what are you laughing at?” 

“nothing, i was just so in love with you then. i used to think that we would be together forever and ride off into the sunset in a carriage.” 

jungwon inspected you as you talked, trying to decipher if there was any meaning behind your words or if it was just the liquor talking. 

“i just thought we were some high school fling?” he half-joked as he nudged you with his shoulder. he didn’t want it to seem like he was serious if you were sobering up. 

he felt his heart start to race as he stared at your slightly flushed face from the drinks you had, your hair fluttering as a soft breeze blew by. you were everything that jungwon had ever wanted, and here you were, telling him how much you used to love him. 

wait, no, what the hell am i doing? jungwon thought to himself. it wasn’t fair to yuna. it was already unfair to her that he only started to date her to get over you. he thought that if he dated her long enough, he would stop loving you and love her instead. 

and he genuinely thought it worked. fuck, he thought. i’m such a shitty person. 

until he saw you with intak, flirting, dancing with him, laughing at his jokes, he had never felt so jealous in his life, and yuna had noticed. and she was upset, which was fair. what wasn’t fair was jungwon using her to get over you. 

use. he hated the icky feeling that word gave him. 

“i lied,” you muttered, snapping him out of his thoughts. 

“what did you say?” jungwon asked, making sure that he had heard you right. 

“i lied,” you repeated, eyes on everything but him. “i loved you, and i think i still do.” 

your eyes finally met his as you continued, “you are everything to me, jungwon. i’ve been in love with you since forever, and i only agreed to break up because you said you wanted to.”

jungwon could feel his heart starting to beat faster as he searched your eyes for any hesitation, any sign that this was a lie, or some sort of joke. his heart beat so fast he felt like he was gonna explode as he looked into your eyes, so earnest and so genuine and so filled with love that he knew you had sobered up. 

you reached for his hands in his lap, interlacing your fingers with his. 

“i can’t keep this from you,” you breathed. “i love you, yang jungwon, and i know you’re dating yuna, but i just have to tell you that i love you, that i always have and it’s okay if you don’t feel the same. i don’t expect you to leave her for me or anything, but i can’t help it anymore. i love you, i love you, i love you.”

silence hung over the two of you as he tried to form a coherent sentence after your confession. it felt like suddenly his brain didn’t know how to make him talk, to make him say i love you too, or to make him do anything, really. 

a minute passed, and then two as jungwon searched your eyes with the same desperation yours had– desperate to love and to be loved by the person sitting in front of you. 

jungwon didn’t know who leaned closer first. he thought it was you but maybe it was him. he didn’t even feel like he was in control of his body as he leaned closer and closer, his hand moving to hold your face, searching your face for any hesitation, for any kind of doubt.

 you were so close that he could smell the perfume you sprayed before you left your house and the drinks that you had earlier that night. 

impatient, jungwon finally closed the gap between the two of you, your soft lips colliding with his. he could have kissed you forever, wanting to stay forever in time there. until realization hit him.

yuna.

he pulled away abruptly, your eyes still closed as you chased his lips with yours. he would have found it cute if he weren’t trying his best not to panic right now. he just kissed you. while he was still dating yuna. 

he thought of the look on yuna’s face if she found out– the angry, hurt expression that she had at the party, and even worse, the tears. he would break the poor girl’s heart. 

“i should go,” jungwon breathed, quickly standing up from his seat beside you. “it’s almost past my curfew.”

“wait, jungwon,” you said, grabbing onto the sleeve of his shirt before he could walk away. “i think we should talk about this before you go.”

“yeah, we can talk later,” he replied dismissively. “i just need some time to think.”

you opened your mouth to say something else– anything else to make him stay, but closed it as you saw he was already speed-walking in the direction of his house. 

you thought that you would lose him forever after your breakup.  you had almost lost jungwon once, and you were nearly positive that you won’t be so lucky to keep him this time. 

you felt sick to your stomach, and you didn’t know if it was from the drinks or from the events that had just occurred, but nonetheless you felt nauseous. 

you hunched over as you started to gag, your vomit flowing out of your mouth, tears streaming down your face. 

you wiped your mouth with your sleeve, rinsing your mouth out with water as you started to tear up. 

before you knew it, you felt sobs rising, your nose stuffed from crying,  your throat getting dry from the sobbing. the embarrassment and sorrow was finally catching up to you– all of the years of repressed love you felt for jungwon, all of the embarrassment from him leaving after you confessed, embarrassment from being a homewrecker– it all came crashing down on you. 

you couldn’t go home like this. you were sober enough to know that, with your tear streaked face, ruined makeup, and vomit smelling breath your parents would put two and two together. 

your hands shakily reached for your phone in your back pocket, dialing your brother’s number and waiting for him to pick up with baited breath. your brother was your only hope. 

“hello?” 

“chan?” you breathed into the phone. “i need to sleepover at your place.”

—----

yuna hated this. 

the waiting, the feeling of dread as she sat on her bed, awaiting jungwon’s arrival. 

the fight that had ensued was horrible, but she believed she made a valid point. if he likes y/n so much he should just go be with her, she thought bitterly. 

jungwon had texted her last night at around 1 in the morning, just to make sure she got home safe. yuna didn’t respond. she instead left him on read, still pissed off from the fight.

she used to get butterflies when he would send her texts to make sure she got home safe. but now she didn’t know if he did it because he liked her or if it was just out of common courtesy. 

yuna was about to just walk to his house herself before she heard a knock on her door. 

“hey it’s uh, me,” she heard jungwon’s muffled voice through the door. “is it okay if i come in?” 

“yeah, let’s get this over with.”

she couldn’t meet his eyes as he walked in, striding over to the corner of her bed. yuna hated waiting, but she now felt dread as the pair sat in silence for a bit, the tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. she had sat nowhere near him.

 usually she’d be cuddled into his side, but she instead opted to sit at the head of her bed, seemingly as far away from him as possible. she was worried that if she was too close to him, she’d crack; she’d look at his doe eyes and forgive him and that would ruin the entire point of her argument. 

“so,” she cleared her throat, interrupting the silence. “did y/n get home safe?” 

“yeah, she’s at her brother’s apartment. he texted me when she got there.”

 “‘when she got there?’ did you not walk her there?” 

“no, he picked her up from the park near our houses. but anyways, i have something important to tell you.” 

yuna felt even more dread seeping into her as he finished his sentence. she should’ve seen this coming from the start. here it comes: the breakup. 

“i kissed y/n last night.” 

yuna’s eyes widened in surprise. she had expected the breakup, yes. she knew jungwon was emotionally cheating, but now he was physically cheating? 

“wait, are you being serious right now?” she laughed in astonishment. she couldn’t believe the audacity of the man sitting in front of her. 

“i know it’s bad. i feel horrible, because an amazing woman like you should never be treated as horrible as i’ve treated you, and i am so so sorry,” jungwon started, tearing up from how bad he felt. “all of the apologies in the world could never make up for how i’ve treated you. i’ve made you feel terrible and i’m just making it worse by breaking up with you to be with her.” 

“i love y/n, yuna. and i’m sorry that i didn’t tell you, or that you had to find out for yourself before i even knew. you are so so perfect yuna-,”

“but i’m just not perfect for you?” she replied, tears starting to form as she breathed those words. 

the silence that followed was more than enough to answer her question. 

she hated this. she hated this so so much. but she didn’t hate you, or jungwon. she just hated how love worked, how she had to fall in love with the one boy who couldn’t love her back. she hated that she gave her heart away to a boy that was never going to belong to her– not fully. 

she wanted to scream, to throw something, hell, maybe even hit him. she instead took a deep breath, composing herself before she said, “okay. go be with her then.” 

jungwon looked over at her, wanting nothing but to comfort yuna. he may not be in love with her, but he did love her, and he still cared for her. 

“i’m sorry, yuna,” jungwon said instead. “you’re an amazing girl, but you should never be anyone’s second choice, and i’m sorry for making you feel like mine.” 

yuna couldn’t even look at him, fidgeting with the strings of the hoodie she wore. 

“just leave, please,” she muttered. 

she didn’t want him to see her cry, he had already broken her once, she didn’t want him to see her fall apart again. 

with a guilty expression, jungwon hurried away, also not wanting to see her cry again. he felt gross. he felt disgusted with himself for treating her that way. he didn’t like the person he was with yuna, and he felt sick thinking about how heartbroken she was; how she was so hurt that she couldn’t even look at him. 

—------

it has been two weeks since your kiss with jungwon, and you hadn’t heard a word from him since. not a single call or text, hell, he didn’t even acknowledge your existence when you walked by him in the halls. 

you had seen yuna around, but seeing as jungwon wasn’t joined at her hip like he used to be, you assumed that things didn’t end quite so well between the two. knowing that you were the cause made you want to never show your face ever again, especially because of the dirty looks yuna’s friends have been giving you. 

you were relieved it was the last day of the school year; you’d never have to see yuna again and feel the guilt at seeing the sadness in her eyes. 

you walked into the bathroom, wanting to wash your hands after eating your lunch, when you saw yuna, touching up on her makeup in the mirror. she looked at you through the mirror above the sink, before going back to her makeup. 

the tension was so thick you didn’t know if you should just leave or hide in a bathroom stall until she left. 

“i’m not gonna bite, you know,” yuna chuckled. 

you smiled back nervously as you started to make your way to the sink. 

“yuna i’m really sorry,” you sighed, mustering whatever courage and dignity you had left. 

“it’s okay,” yuna replied, finally meeting your gaze. “although it was wrong for you guys to have kissed, i saw the breakup coming from miles away. he was never mine to begin with.” 

you were taken aback just by how calm she was, with the way she spoke those words with such elegance and grace. she had every right to be angry with you, to yell at you and call you a homewrecker. 

“even if you did think you were going to break up, that still doesn’t excuse what i did, and i really am sorry,” you said, trying to project every feeling of sympathy and sincerity you could in that one sentence. “i’m not asking you to forgive me, or jungwon, but i just wanted to tell you that you really are a cool person, and you’ve always been so kind to me, even now. all of this for a boy, and he hasn’t even talked to me in the past two weeks.”

“wait, he hasn’t reached out to you at all?” yuna asked, confused. “i thought he would say something to you at least.” 

“did he say he would?” you replied, confusion reaching you as well. 

“no,” yuna replied, fixing her hair in the mirror. “i just assumed so because he’s in love with you.”

once again, you were stunned by her nonchalance. “he’s not in love with me.” 

“don’t be silly,” yuna smiled softly. “i can’t tell if dating jungwon was the best or worst six months of my life, to be honest.” 

“don’t get me wrong, he was a good boyfriend,” yuna backtracked quickly after seeing the guilt on your face. “he did the usual boyfriend stuff, and he really did try, but i could just always tell that his heart was always yours.” 

you couldn’t meet yuna’s gaze as she said this, your face hot with shame. you felt so bad for her, and you didn’t quite know what to say in response. 

“i’m sorry that things ended this way,” you finally said. 

“it’s okay, it was gonna happen sooner or later,” yuna replied. “but if i’m right, then you should probably go talk to him, he’s probably going insane with guilt right now over me, and over you. bro’s got a lot on his plate.” 

you gave a small chuckle at the last sentence, making yuna smile a bit. 

“well thank you for the talk yuna, but i’ve gotta go. i think i need to go find jungwon.” 

yuna felt her heart break a bit at the words, but she smiled anyways and said bye as she watched you leave the bathroom. yuna didn’t know if she was supposed to cry or feel happy for you and jungwon, but she did know that she was right. again. she knew his heart had always belonged to you. anyone could see that. 

—--------

trying to find jungwon was easier than you expected. he was sitting on a swing, at the park that you became his, then wasn’t his anymore, and then confessed your love to him. there was so much that had happened at this park that it made your head hurt a bit just thinking about it. 

“is it okay if i sit here?” you asked, motioning to the swing beside him. 

“of course you can,” jungwon replied. 

the two of you sat in silence.

“i don’t think we should be friends anymore,” you finally spoke up. 

he jerked his head to look at you, shock coursing through him. “wait, why not?”

you took a deep breath before saying, “i can’t be friends with you anymore because i’m in love with you. there hasn’t been a moment since i’ve met you that i haven’t been.” 

his heart skipped a beat at your words. 

this was it, this is what you’d been waiting for since the day you laid eyes on jungwon. but you didn’t think it would go quite like this. you sat there for a moment as jungwon studied you, and you wished he would say something, anything. 

“but did you ever consider how i felt?” he finally asked, his voice cracking ever so slightly. “have you ever considered that maybe i’ve felt the same way?” 

you felt your breath catch in your throat as he continued, “i’ve seen you everyday since we were five when your family moved in next door. but i didn’t really see you until freshman year, sitting in class by the window, your hair flowing from the breeze that came through, doodling in your notebook instead of paying attention to the lesson. and when you caught me staring, you smiled and waved, and i swear i fell in love with you that day. that day, i knew my heart would always be yours.” 

“so please,” jungwon pleaded. “please, do whatever you want with it. you could break it a million times over and it would still be yours.”

now this, this was exactly you had always dreamed of. 

you couldn’t stop yourself from kissing him, trying to convey all the repressed love you’ve had for him for years through the kiss. you loved him. you loved every single part of jungwon, every flaw, every imperfection, everything that made him him. 

“so does this mean we’re official?” jungwon grinned as he pulled away, a playful look in his eyes. you smiled back, feeling the heart eyes in your gaze and the way your heart melted just by looking at him. 

“took you long enough.” 

[seokgyuu]

→ PAIRING: Seokmin x Afab!Reader. → GENRE: College!Au, kinda comedy, small bit of angst if you look hard enough, teeny tiny fluff, smut MDNI. → SYNOPSIS: After having a crush on Lee Seokmin for three years, he somehow ends up wanting to be your roommate. Instead of rejecting him, you decide to give him the vacant room - right after confessing your feelings for him.

→ WARNINGS: roommate!seok, wet dreams, coming untouched (f), degradation, usage of the words slut, baby, angel, masturbation (m), making out, like really so much kissing, fingering, finger-sucking, she loves his fingers lol, unprotected sex (don't.. just don't), creampie.

→  WORDCOUNT: 11.5k

A/N: hi guys!! here it is (for some of you even on the date it was scheduled to be posted!), my first ever stand-alone svt fic! no part 2, no whole ass series, just this cute 11.5k baby I wrote after being deep inside my seokmin shaped hole (i am always in a seokmin shaped hole actually). i want to thank my bestie @honeykyeom for making the amazing header as well for being my inspiration for writing this <3 ily!! now, i hope you enjoy and as always please reblog & comment, these things are what makes writing worth while <3

You had a crush. A big fat stupid crush. And it was starting to get extremely annoying. You really tried to stop liking him because a.) he didn’t even know you existed and b.) even if he did he would never ever like you back because what are the odds for that to actually happen?

“People get together all the time, Y/N, stop being dumb,” Seungkwan, your best friend, would say on the regular since the topic came up basically every other day. Yet, you still didn’t believe the Lee Seokmin would ever give you so much as a second glance. He was too perfect. Perfect grades, perfect friend group, perfect face, perfect everything. You had first laid eyes on him on your first day of classes - he had started the same year as you, smile on his face, shiny new MacBook propped in front of him. He wore an adorable baby blue sweater and black rimmed glasses, his hair falling into his forehead and, god, you were gone the second you heard his honey dripping voice. 

That had been three years ago and now, both of you in your senior years, you still hadn’t talked to him even once. Or well, no, you had, when he had asked you for a phone charger which you had given him in exactly three seconds. You were still proud of that. 

*

“Hey, I heard you’re looking for a roommate?” 

“Are you- are you talking to me?” Your index finger was pointing at yourself while you blinked a few times at the person in front of you. 

“Uh, I mean, you are Y/N, right?” Kim Mingyu seemed just as confused as you. Probably because you were in fact Y/N and you were, in fact, looking for a roommate, but how on earth did he know that?

“No, I mean, yes, yes I am, but, uh, how do you- how do you know I’m looking for a roommate?”

“Oh, Seungkwan told me!” 

“You know Seungkwan?!”

Mingyu seems a little startled by your sudden outburst. You cleared your throat before chuckling nervously.

“S-sorry, I just didn’t know Seungkwan and you knew each other.”

“We go to the same gym, actually, and I told him my friend is desperately looking for a place and he told me you are in search of a roommate so…,” his smile was bright and pretty and you felt like you were about to wake up from a dream because why the hell was Seokmin’s bestie talking to you as if he had done it thousand of times before?

“I see, uh, I mean, I am definitely desperate for a roommate, rent you know, like, uh, I need to pay it soon and… well, I am short half of it and that’s what I would… need the roommate for,” you scratched your ear. Smooth.

“No, I understand! And my friend is just as desperate. See, he just broke up with his long-term girlfriend, she cheated on him, and now he just really needs to move out.”

“Oh, damn, sorry about that. You can tell him he can come by, eh, does tomorrow work? Like afternoon-ish? I have classes until four.”

“Awesome! I’ll let him know, thank you Y/N!”

Mingyu beamed at you, his hand up in the air as he waved, walking away and out of the building. Letting out a sigh you hadn’t even known you were holding, you grabbed your phone from your bag and unlocked it, quickly moving your fingers over the display to call Seungkwan. Walking out the opposite direction Mingyu had, you waited for your best friend to pick up, pushing open the door into the hot air of the early evening. 

“What’s up?” Seungkwan finally picked up and you rolled your eyes at the greeting.

“Hello to you too, Kwannie,” you said in a sweet voice, hearing Seungkwan scoff as a response.

“I’m in the middle of something, Y/N. So, what’s up?” 

“Kim Mingyu just asked me if a friend of his can move in with me,” you raised your brows as you walked over the campus to the parking lot, the keys to your car already dangling from your fingers, “care to tell me why you didn’t mention that?”

“Ah, that, well, I actually met Mingyu at the gym earlier today, like super early morning, and heard him talk to his friend on the phone and well, since I do have a few classes with him, I thought I should offer.”

“You should offer? Pretty sure it’s still my apartment you were selling off to a stranger.”

“Now, now. Mingyu isn’t a stranger now, is he? How many times have you stalked his insta now to look at that one specific gym picture of Seokm-,”

“Whatever, just- just please, for the future, let me know when you tell someone about my living situation, alright?”

“Sure thing, bestie. Now, can I get back to what I was doing?”

“Of course. Tell Hansol I said hi.” Before he could either protest or deny, you hung up and shoved your phone into your pocket. 

*

You dreamt of him again. It was a rare occasion, but it happened. Most of the time the dreams were innocent enough, just him touching your face, him laughing at your jokes, him simply acknowledging your existence. 

But this one was different. 

Seokmin was right above you, his body hot and sweaty. His eyes said so much more than words ever could and yet you longed to hear his voice. Longed to hear him say your name. He was buried deep inside you, his hips still, eyes never leaving yours. He throbbed, his whole body seemingly vibrated at how much he wanted you, your legs wrapped around his waist, wanting nothing more than for him to take you, mark you, fill you. 

“Tell me what you want,” he whispered, his hand caressing your face and you moved your head, your mouth sucking in his thumb, feeling him twitch inside of you.

“You can’t really talk with that in your mouth, can you, Y/N?” Fuck, his voice was so low so deep and when he finally moved down to kiss your neck, stuffing his thumb even further down your mouth, his hips now beginning to thrust, all of you began to shake. 

Then, suddenly, you were in your living room, right there on that windowsill that connected the kitchen and the living room, his hips drilling into you. He was wearing a dress shirt and a black tie, but both of it was loosened around his neck, your hands on his broad shoulders as he seemed to have made it his goal to fuck you senseless. You were a moaning mess, his lips sucking harshly on your skin, you yourself being completely naked. His mouth was everywhere: your neck, your stiff nipple, your lips. He took all of you in and you breathed in every bit he gave you. 

“You’re so fucking good for me, baby, so good, such a good little slut, letting me fuck her like this.”

“Mhm, y-yes, I l-love the way you f-fuck me, Seok!” His grip on you got stronger, hands digging harshly into your hips as he threw his head back now, your eyes taking in all of his beauty. The droplets of sweat, the bopping Adam’s apple as he swallowed, the way his vein popped out right there on his neck…

“Gonna make me cum, baby,” he moaned and you nodded strongly, feeling your own climax so close.

“Please, want your cum so bad!” you whined and as if those had been the magic words, Seokmin emptied inside of you, the feeling of his cum hitting you so deep-

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

You screamed, while your back hit the floor. You had fallen out of bed, your alarm blasting on the other side of your bed. 

“Fuck,” you groaned, sitting up slowly, your hand rubbing the back of your head. Funnily enough, that wasn’t the only part of you that throbbed. Just for a completely different reason. 

-

“You came in your sleep?” Seungkwan was impressed with you. You just wanted to punch him because why did he have to say that this loud right in the line for lunch?

“Shut up!” you said through gritted teeth and Seungkwan snorted, before grabbing the big spoon for the Kimchi.

“Don’t worry, no one is listening.” Instead of arguing with him you rolled your eyes and grabbed some Japchae before heading to the drinks. 

“But to answer your question: yes, I did. And no, that has never happened before. Like, I never ever had a dream like that, Seungkwan, never!”

“Aw, I can’t believe my best friend lost her wet dream virginity at the ripe age of 24!” He grinned as the two of you sat down at an empty table. You ignored him.

“It was so real. I honestly feel sick to my stomach. How could it have been so real?” 

It was truly astonishing to you. Hours had passed and the dream was still there, playing in your head over and over again, making you squeeze your thighs together more than not in the worst moments. Statistic class wasn’t supposed to make you horny and yet, you couldn’t say it hadn’t.

“I’m jealous. I never had an actual wet dream make me cum before, like yeah, I woke up with cum in my underwear before, but then again that’s kind of normal I guess?”

“Dude! You don’t need wet dreams to make you orgasm, you have a literal boyfriend!”

“He is not my boyfriend!” Seungkwan protested and you grabbed your juice box to take a dramatic sip from it. 

“Well, sounds like a you problem. Doesn’t change the fact you’re getting laid, though.” Seungkwan scoffed, crossing his arms as he leaned back in his chair. He apparently didn’t have a comeback. Served him right.

“It’s not like you are trying to change that,” nevermind. You sigh, putting the drink down again.

“What am I supposed to do? Just hook up with a random guy and act like I’m not madly in love with someone who doesn’t know I exist?”

“He knows you exist, you god damn drama queen. You had every class together first semester!”

You ignored him. Instead, you decided that your Japchae is the most interesting thing you had ever seen. Seungkwan shook his head and clicked his tongue.

“You’re an idiot, Y/N. Like the biggest idiot I have ever met.”

“Takes one to know one,” you muttered as a response, feeling a piece of kimchi hitting your cheek the next second. 

*

You were home at four forty-five and hoped there would still be time to clean up the place at least a little bit before the potential-new-roommate-slash-friend-of-Kim-Mingyu showed up. In record time you found yourself standing in a semi-clean living room (meaning: maybe the floor showed some signs of needing to be vacuumed, but at least everything looked tidy) with all the windows open in hope for some cool air because you sure as hell weren’t going to turn on the AC without another person to cover the costs. 

Just as you finished changing into some clothes not sweated through, the doorbell rang. Quickly, you made your way to the door, buzzing them up, only to hear a knock on the door next. Oh, so he had been let in already. Putting on your most charming smile, you pulled the door open, only for the smile to fade the second you saw who stood there right in front of your door. 

“Y/N?” 

Lee Seokmin had just said your name. And he was standing in front of your apartment.

“Seokmin, what- what are you doing here?” You asked, oblivious to the situation. 

“I- uh, I- Mingyu said he told you I was coming?”

“Mingyu? No he said that-,” you lost your ability to speak just then. The friend Mingyu had been talking about-

“Wait, you- you’re the potential new roommate?!” Your voice was barely anything but a squeak. Seokmin looked a little lost, his fingers nervously fidgeting with the hem of his oversized yellow jumper.

“Yeah, did he not mention that?” 

Nope, seems like he forgot that part. You swallowed, pressing your lips together for a second while your brain tried to fully grasp the situation. This was Seokmin. Aka the guy you have been in love with for three years. And he wanted to move in with you. 

“Uh, no. Sorry, please come in!” You took a step back and Seokmin smiled at you (HE smiled at YOU!!!), walking into your apartment and looking around as you closed the door, hoping your racing heart would calm down. You wouldn’t exactly bet on it though. 

Seokmin took his shoes off and you watched him, already beginning to chew on your lip like you always did when you were nervous. He turned around and you quickly smiled, walking into the living space.

“So, this is the living room, it uh-,” you stopped speaking, your eyes now on the window connecting the kitchen and living room, on the windowsill you had just dreamt about last night. Your face suddenly got very hot. 

“It connects to the kitchen through that window, which I thought was really cool, big selling point,” you watched as Seokmin walked over to the kitchen, his eyes roaming through the room and when he stopped in front of the window, hand touching the sill you nearly felt yourself loose footing. Why the fuck did he have to do this? For a second you were convinced this was just another dream. 

“It definitely is unique,” he said, nodding and walking into the small but modern kitchen.

“Uhm, there is a dishwasher in the kitchen and a microwave. We don’t have an oven, but I am pretty sure I have like a small one in the attic. I am more of a take-out or quick meal kind of gal, so I don’t really use it much. But if you were interested in baking something, I could definitely get it down,” Jesus, why on earth were you talking so much? But Seokmin seemed to appreciate it, nodding understandingly as he looked around with a small pout on his lips. Maybe this wasn’t the right moment (or maybe it was the perfect moment) to stare at him, but you did. You watched his every move, how he checked out the cupboards, how he asked before he opened the fridge, how he pulled a hand through his hair as he asked a question. 

Oh! 

“Sorry?” You crossed your arms, the hotness of your cheeks only increasing. Seokmin chuckled.

“I asked if you had a certain system in your fridge with your old roommate.”

“Oh, well, not really. We kind of always planned what we were going to eat, she was a big cook actually. Enjoyed it a lot. I store my Ramen right here, wait,” you walked into the kitchen fully now too, to the cupboard next to where Seokmin was standing and got on your tiptoes to reach for the door, opening it in a swing.

“There,” you explained, looking over at Seokmin - only to see him look at you instead of the food. You blinked a few times. He blushed.

“Ah, yes, I see. Cool. So, uh, no system. That’s fine with me! I wouldn’t say I’m a cook per sé, but I can hook up some simple dishes,” he turned away, your whole body suddenly feeling a lot hotter than a second before. Nodding, you closed the cupboard again and walked back outside. Seokmin followed you.

You showed him the rest of the apartment (except for your room) and finally the two of you ended up in the living room again where you sat down on the couch. 

“I, uh, I would love to take the room, Y/N. But it’s obviously up to you.” His smile was so… you gulped down whatever response you had in your mind. Now wasn’t the time to eat right out of his hands, no, you had to think about this. On the one hand, you really needed a roommate. There was no chance you could hold this apartment by yourself and you really didn’t want to move. But on the other hand, this was Seokmin. You couldn’t just let him move in with you when you liked him this much, could you? At least not without him knowing. An idea popped into your head. It was risky and stupid and you would probably regret this. But then again - if he wanted to move in, and apparently he was just as desperate as you to get this room, it would only be fair to let him know what the situation was. 

“Look, Seokmin,” you started, your hands in your lap, your heart racing again (or still). You looked up at him, your cheeks still bright red. Seokmin watched you, unsure what to make of your current behavior. He decided to just let you talk.

“I really need a roommate. And you really need a place to live. Mingyu, uh, he told me about the break-up and I’m really sorry about that,” - you were also happy you hadn’t tried to make a move considering he had a girlfriend -, “but I would feel horrible to let you take this room without knowing the full truth.” 

Now, Seokmin got a little spooked. The full truth? Were you going to confess that you were a drug dealer? Part of some gang? But then you probably wouldn’t need a roommate considering you’d make good money. 

“I, uh, okay,” Seokmin swallowed hard. You took a deep breath.

“I like you. As in, I like you. I have for years now. I didn’t know you had a girlfriend, and to be honest, even if I had, I probably wouldn’t have succeeded in getting over this crush. I’m not telling you because I am expecting anything from you, I promise, hell, I never planned on telling you ever. But you want the room and I would be happy to give it to you, I would just feel weird having you live here with this big secret to keep.”

There were approximately three minutes of silence in which you were sure Seokmin would get up and leave. He stared at you, his mouth slightly dropped and you could have kicked yourself for finding him endearing. Starting to shift on your seat once the third minute started, Seokmin realized he had been staring instead of answering. But then again, he really had not expected this sudden confession. 

“I, uh, I am flattered, Y/N, really, I just, I- I just got out of a relationship and-,”

“I know that! As I said, I didn’t tell you because I want anything from you. I have been happy liking you from afar, Seokmin. And who knows, maybe having you close by all the time will actually make me stop liking you. I mean, what if you’re like a total slob or listen to super weird historical podcasts?” 

“What do you have against historical podcasts?” Seokmin asked, eyebrows raised in surprise. You chuckled.

“Nothing in particular. But my last roommate listened to them on like full blast. Just got annoying at some point.” 

He nodded now, understanding. Yeah, he could see why that would be annoying at some point. Still, that wasn’t the real issue here. Or, well, was it really an issue? He cleared his throat. 

“I- I don’t take you as someone who would let her feelings get the best of her. And, to be honest, I’m not really the type of guy you should have a crush on, Y/N. But, uh, I’m still very flattered. And I don’t think this would stop me from moving in, as you said, we are both desperate.”

You were surprised and it showed. Seokmin chuckled.

“Or do you not want me here?”

“No! I do, I really need you to move in,” you said, tugging a loose strand of hair behind your ear. Seokmin nodded again. 

“Then it’s settled. I’ll get my stuff asap and then we’ll be roomies.”

“Can’t wait!”

*

Seungkwan thought you were insane. He hadn’t known it was Seokmin when Mingyu had approached him and now he regretted ever offering it. 

“What do you mean you told him?!” He was sitting at your small dinner table in the living room. You shrugged. 

“What was I supposed to do? Just let him move in and carry this huge ass secret with me all the time? I don’t think so.”

“You could have just told him no, Y/N.”

“Right, and then what? I see him in class every other day? How awkward would that be?”

“You mean as awkward as living with a guy who knows you have a crush on him?!” When you shrugged again, Seungkwan groaned, pulling his hands over his face.

“You’re seriously insane, I can’t believe you did this!”

And about a week after Seokmin had officially moved in, you couldn’t believe it either. 

Living with Seokmin proved to do the exact opposite of what you had mentioned in your chat with him. He wasn’t a slob. And he also didn’t listen to any podcast on full volume. He cleaned, cooked, gave you space. Every morning he got up earlier than you and prepared coffee, before going out for a jog - only to come back while you were having breakfast, looking all sweaty and sexy. The first time this had happened you had choked on your toast, drinking what felt like one whole liter of orange juice before finally being able to stop coughing. Seokmin had hit your back a few times, apologizing for startling you. And yet, he didn’t stop doing it, which made you used to it after a while (it didn’t).  

Instead of falling out of love with him, you found yourself drawn to him even more, craving his presence. When he was gone, you missed him, and when he was home you wanted to hear everything about his day, wanted to eat dinner with him, watch a new episode of that show you had started together. 

*

Seokmin was outside in the living room, his laptop placed on his lap, an essay he needed to proof read opened as he sipped on a can of beer. He was on his favorite spot on the floor, right in front of the couch, leaning his back against it. Actually, he had wanted to go to sleep an hour ago, but then he had talked with his sister on the phone and now he was back to this. It had been two months since he had moved in with you despite knowing you had feelings for him. Back when you had originally told him, he had felt like he should probably run because the last thing he needed right now was complicated. Things with Hyorin had been complicated enough. But, as he now knew, you weren’t complicated in the slightest. More so the opposite. It didn’t take long for Seokmin to begin to understand you and your patterns. It also didn’t take long for him to figure out how much you actually liked him. If he had been anyone else he might have taken advantage of that. Flirt with you, get you into his bed. But he was Seokmin, he wasn’t a guy who would do that. Not that he hadn’t… thought about it. Seeing the way you looked at him, especially after his morning runs or when he came back from the gym in the evening… it took everything in him not to imagine you looking at him that way when he was fucking you. 

Seokmin wasn’t a sex-hungry person, normally. Maybe because he had been in a long-term relationship for five years. But now, with his relationship being over for two months and the periods before that being dry in the sex department… he was starting to miss it. Dearly. 

So, when he sat there on the floor, his head focusing on the contents of this essay he wrote a day earlier in the library, he couldn’t really help getting distracted by the sounds coming from your room. His ears perked up and his head turned sideways, throat already drying up. Were you crying? Maybe you were-

“O-oh.”

His laptop slipped from his lap when he got up. His heart speed rose and sweat was starting to form on his hairline. That certainly wasn’t the type of crying he had meant. Slowly, he walked over to the door of your room that he only now realized wasn’t properly shut. He felt bad, guilty even, when he peeked through the small opening, seeing you apparently asleep. A dream? He licked his lips. Were you dreaming? 

“S-Seokmin.” 

Something inside him switched over. His whole body started to heat up, his cock desperately beginning to twitch in his briefs. Fuck, he hadn’t ever expected that hearing you moan his name would do so much. You were dreaming, yes, about him. And he heard you, heard you moaning, the whimpers. And god, did you sound perfect. He leaned against the wall next to your room, letting his dick get harder with every second, waiting for your noises like an addict. He couldn’t stop, couldn’t get himself to move away and mind his own business. He was intoxicated by you. He took everything he could, every breath, as small as they might be. The sighs following the moan of his name. 

For now, he only listened. He didn’t want to touch himself here, didn’t want to be that type of person. But then again, he had already parked himself right outside your room, listening to you having a wet dream, it wasn’t like beginning to jerk off would make much of a difference. So, he slowly moved his hand, palming himself over his sweats, feeling how hard he was because of you. He closed his eyes, ears concentrating only on you. He wondered what you were dreaming about. What was he doing to you right now? Was he holding you down as he fucked you? Was he going down on you, tasting you? God, he really wanted to taste you. 

For a second he contemplated going in and waking you up - making your dream reality. But he couldn’t. Not knowing what he did. 

Opening his eyes, he suddenly felt guilt rushing over him and he was quick to close your door, making his way over to where he had sat earlier and grabbing his laptop. 

Once he was in his own room, door locked and all, he tried to clear his head of the sounds you had made, of the way it was him you were dreaming about. But with his cock this hard and you so close… it was no use. He put his laptop on his desk and laid down on his bed after, taking a deep breath. He couldn’t hear you from his room and, god, was he relieved. Not hearing you did not equal not remembering you, though. And so, knowing he was going to lose to his conscience anyways, he opened the drawer in his bedside table and got out the package of lube, squeezing a bit on his right hand, while the left shoved down his sweats and briefs, letting his erection hit the cool air of his room. 

He sighed in relief when his right hand began squeezing him, head leaned back into the pillows, hand now moving up and down slowly. You were right there in front of his inner eye, the way you sounded, but also the image of how you would look underneath him. Moaning his name, begging him to go faster. Then, he imagined your cheek stuffed with his cock, imagined your teary eyes when he began fucking down your throat. 

“F-fuck,” he couldn’t help but go faster, his hips lifting up his bed as he fucked his fist, wishing it was your pussy or your mouth, any of your holes would do. How badly he wanted to hear you beg, wanted you to be on your knees, mouth open and tongue out, ready to take whatever he was willing to give. Pouty lips and round eyes, wishing for nothing more than Seokmin’s cock filling you up. 

“God, just like that, Y/N, f-fuck,” he couldn’t help but moan as he came, his load landing on his clothed chest. 

Coming down from his high, Seokmin opened his eyes, blinking a few times before he really understood what had happened. Groaning, he let his left hand rub over his face, before he shook his head and sat up. He got rid of his shirt and threw it in the laundry bin, walking to the door unlocking and opening it to go to the bathroom - only to run into you who just came out of the bathroom. Your eyes grew wide when you spotted Seokmin - shirtless and sweaty and with this certain look in his eyes that made your legs grow weaker. 

Not knowing what he was doing, Seokmin walked straight over to you, his hands finding the sides of your neck, his lips crashing into yours a second later. You didn’t know what was happening, didn’t know what to do - but you kissed him back, your hands on his broad back, as he pushed you against the wall, his meaty perfect thigh shoved between your legs now, pressing against your still sensitive core. You gasped into the kiss, his tongue now devouring yours, one of his hands moving down and underneath your shirt, grabbing your breast and squeezing it harshly. Your arms locked around his neck, moans getting caught by his skillful mouth. Were you still dreaming? 

“Seokmin,” you moaned when his hand squeezed your nipple and only then did he realize what was happening. Immediately, he parted from you, causing you to miss his kiss and touch the second he left. 

“What-,” you began, but before you could even finish the question, he had already turned around and walked back into his room, closing the door behind him. And locking it. 

*

He acted like nothing happened. You were anxiously waiting in the kitchen the next morning, but once he came back from his run he just showed you his normal goofy self, excusing himself to go take a  shower. The way you had stood there, fully ready (not really) to talk about the night before, still in your pjs, still dizzy from the dream you had had as well as the very real kiss afterward. Why had he done that? Had he suddenly turned into a sleepwalker? A sleepwalker that kissed his roommate as if he had been starving? 

You sure as hell weren’t going to bring it up first. So, you played along, pretending like it didn’t happen. 

“I am declaring you clinically insane, Y/N,” Seungkwan was munching away on his corndog, while you and his (not) boyfriend Hansol sat opposite him at one of the smaller booths of the diner.

“He started it,” you shrugged, grabbing your own corndog now to take a bite from it.

“Okay, and? You could have started the conversation. For example: “Hey roomie, so about that night where you came out of your room clearly just done with getting yourself off and then kissed me? Like really hard? Against a wall?” See, that would have been a great conversation starter.”

You deadpanned at him.

“You’re an idiot,” shaking your head, you leaned back in your seat, “what if he really like, I don’t know, was in a delirious state? Maybe he drank alone before bed and just had a black out?”

“Or maybe he is an asshole who can’t own up to his actions,” Seungkwan shrugged, “but sure, yours sounds way more likely.”

“Seungkwan is right, Y/N. You should just bring it up,” Hansol looked at you and you sighed, letting your head drop onto the table.

“I don’t think I can. I’m too mortified. What if he totally regrets kissing me and that’s why he is pretending like it didn’t happen?”

“That still doesn’t give him permission to act this way. I don’t care if he is deeply in love with you or hates you, I just want him to be humane enough to tell you.”

It stung, the way he was right. Whatever Seokmin was feeling, he had to share it with you. He couldn’t just- 

“Am I going crazy or is Seokmin standing outside?” You raised your head again, eyes wide when you realized you were, in fact, not going crazy. Seokmin was right there outside the diner, on the other side of the street, his phone in his hand, an anxious look on his face.

“Did you tell him you were coming here?” Hansol asked and you shook your head.

“No, we barely saw each other this morning.”

What was he doing here? And why did he look like he would rather be anywhere else? Your eyes scanned the surroundings, a sour feeling suddenly spreading in your guts. You were only a few streets down from your apartment, the street wasn’t exactly busy but had some really good places to eat. This was the perfect meeting spot for-

“Who’s that?” Seungkwan shifted closer to the window next to you, his eyes squeezed together as if he was trying harder to recognise whoever had just shown up next to Seokmin. You didn’t have to know her to… know her. Hyorin. His ex-girlfriend that had cheated on him. He had mentioned her to you only a few times, you being a little reluctant to ask considering he knew how you felt about him. But from what you had gathered he hated her, never wanted to see her again. So why was he here now? With her?

“Is that…?” Seungkwan looked over at you, worry displayed on his face and you pressed your lips together as you nodded. 

She was beautiful. Tall, long silky black hair. Her skin glowing even from here. She was the girl Seokmin should be kissing in his delirious state, in any state, really. You swallowed down the tears that threatened to spill out and averted your gaze. Your appetite had left you and you wanted nothing more than to flee the scene, go home and never think of this moment again.

“Should we leave?” Hansol asked, looking over at Seungkwan a little helplessly. Seungkwan nodded quickly and his (not) boyfriend grabbed your arm and helped you get out of the booth. As much as you felt like yelling at him that you didn’t need this help, as much did you appreciate the gesture. Seungkwan paid at the front desk and you left the diner, your heart in desperate need for some distraction. 

*

When Seokmin got home that evening, you weren’t there. A part of him was relieved while another one already missed your presence. Sighing, he kicked off his shoes and finally slipped down onto the couch, hands rubbing over his face. This whole thing was a mess. Today was a mess. Hyorin had called him and asked him to meet up and because he was who he was he had said yes. He should have known she would just try to apologize for the nth time, telling him it had only happened once and that he was the only one for her. Little did she know that he gave zero fucks at this point. He didn’t want her anymore, he didn’t love her anymore. She had broken his heart and stomped on it, had lied and cheated, had done all these horrible things to him. And yet, he was somewhat grateful because now he was right here. In your apartment. 

It was silly, really, because he had been dating Hyorin for two years already when he saw you the first time. You and your cute gray sweatshirt and the high ponytail. You, who had been the cutest person in every single one of your classes together. You, who he couldn’t develop feelings for because he had a girlfriend. Unlike Hyorin, he wasn’t a cheater. He had loved her, truly loved her. And he had been shattered when he found out about the other guy, feeling like he could never be fixed again. He had to get out of the shared apartment, had to leave it all behind as soon as he possibly could - and he had somehow ended up on your doorstep. It was crazy how the universe worked. 

And as if that hadn’t been enough, you suddenly confessed to him, turning all of his feelings upside down. Because what was he supposed to say? Supposed to do? God, he was heartbroken over Hyorin and yet there was this ray of light in the shape of a girl that loved to spend her evenings watching trashy teen drama and cry over a bucket of Ben & Jerry’s when a character you didn’t even particularly like died on screen. 

Seokmin didn’t want to allow him to like you. He was scared that maybe you liking him altered his brain chemistry, that perhaps he would want to be with you only as a rebound and you were too good, too perfect to be anything of that kind. And so, when that night had happened and he had lost his composure, he knew he messed up. He knew you had feelings for him, god, he probably would have figured it out even if you hadn’t told him. Not just because of the dream he had overheard but because of the way you looked at him. The way you smiled, the way you laughed. He didn’t want you to look at anyone else like that. 

The sound of a door unlocking filled the quiet room now and was soon joined by the giggles of a girl and the nervous laugh of a guy - and both of these voices were familiar to Seokmin. He immediately got up and walked over to the entry way - only to see Mingyu holding your waist as you, obviously drunk, tried to get out of your shoes.

“Mingyu?” Seokmin asked confusedly.

“Oh, hey Seok,” Mingyu said, holding you steady as you felt your knees giving in. 

“What- what is going on?” 

“We met at a bar, she was with Seungkwan and his boyfriend-,”

“He is not his boyfriend!” you interrupted him with a giggle.

“Uh, right, Seungkwan and his not-boyfriend were also super drunk and I called them a cab, but I really didn’t want to send Y/N home on her own so-,”

“Why didn’t you call me?” Seokmin now came closer, his eyes set on his best friend’s hand around your waist, his insides slowly but surely heating up with something he could only recognize as jealousy.

“Uh, I thought you were busy with… you know.”

Seokmin’s jaw tensed, his eyes fixed on Mingyu who had successfully held you down as you stepped out of your shoes.

“That has been resolved hours ago, Mingyu.”

“And how was he supposed to know that, hm?” The sudden sound of your voice made both men look over at you. Your hand was raised, finger pointed at Seokmin accusingly. 

“Y/N-“, Mingyu started, but you shook your head and finally freed yourself from Mingyu’s grasp.

“No! No, I’m tired of this! Was it nice? Seeing your perfect ex again? Do you want to go back to her now? Move out and act like I don’t exist? Like you didn’t kiss me?”

Mingyu held his breath. You had told him all this in the bar earlier, where he had met you and Seungkwan and Hansol and where he had realized that you were madly in love with his best friend. He felt bad about you having seen Seokmin with Hyorin, but even more did he feel bad because it was also so painfully obvious that Seokmin liked you, too. 

“I think you’re drunk,” Seokmin noted and you laughed, throwing your hands in the air. Mingyu stayed quiet.

“Do you, now? How observant of you, Seokmin.”

The two of you were staring at each other now, fury in both your eyes. Honestly, you didn’t know what he was angry about. After all you weren’t the one running back to her ex after kissing him the way he had you. 

“I, uh, I guess I should go now,” Mingyu pointed at the door with his thumb over his shoulder, “you seem to… well, have a lot to talk about.” 

The normally so cheerful and kind Seokmin didn’t wish his best friend a good night, nor did he even look at him when he left. Instead he kept looking at you, saw the way you waved at Mingyu and thanked him, your hand squeezing his arm. Lightning was shooting through him. Jealousy was about to eat him up, was about to make him grab you and yell that you shouldn’t touch Mingyu like that. It was dumb and he knew it. You made him crazy, you made him dumb. Like a teenager who was in love for the first time, unsure what to make of it. 

Once the door had fallen shut, you stormed past your roommate, ready to enter your room and not leave it until the next day. Just that you didn’t get far. Seokmin ended up grabbing your arm after all, his touch burning on your skin. 

“Mingyu is right, we do have a lot to talk about,” he said in a hushed voice, making you scoff. 

“Fine, then talk.” With whatever willpower you had left, you looked at him. Saw the way his eyes were full of an emotion you couldn’t pinpoint - the fury from before still slightly visible but not alone. Perhaps it was anger for you speaking to him the way you had. Or maybe he was just annoyed at you for being drunk and loud and stupid. 

“Look, Y/N. What happened between us was… it shouldn’t have happened, alright?”

“Why? Because you’re back together with your cheating ex?”

“No! God, no, I would never get back with Hyorin. And I can’t believe Mingyu told you about this and-,”

“He didn’t!” You freed yourself out of his grip, your eyes dangerously beginning to prickle, “I saw you. With her.” 

He inhaled audibly - he hadn’t expected this. You saw him? With Hyorin? No wonder you were this upset. He pulled his hand through his hair.

“She wanted to talk things out. And because I’m too nice of a person I told her yes. Y/N, I don’t want to be with her anymore. She broke my heart, she hasn’t been the girl I fell in love with for ages now.” 

“Why did you kiss me?” If you were honest, you didn’t really care about when Hyorin had stopped being the girl Seokmin loved. You were more interested in whether you were. 

“I shouldn’t have done that.” 

Pang. Your face flinched before your jaw tensed. 

“Right,” your voice was smaller than you had wanted it to be, and the tears were even closer to spilling now. Of course he regretted it. Regretted kissing you, regretted making you feel the way you had. Because why would it be any different? Perhaps you should have tried to hook up with Mingyu tonight just to feel something different than this ache inside of you. 

“I just- fuck, I just don’t want to take advantage of you. Of what you feel for me.”

Now, the tears of hurt were quickly changing to tears of anger. This man really had a talent in making you switch emotions in seconds. 

“Excuse me? You- what?” You laughed bitterly, shaking your head, “don’t do this. Don’t make yourself look like a hero because you stepped back from kissing me. You did that because you wanted to. I didn’t come onto you even once in all the time you’ve been living here. So don’t you dare pin this on me or my feelings.” You hated that you began to shake and that your voice was higher than anticipated. You hated that the way he looked at you made you feel small and idiotic, made you feel as if you were the dumbest person on this earth. Instead of waiting for his response, you turned around on your heel, walking into your room and slamming the door shut behind you.

*

No one wanted to be in Seokmin’s shoes right now. After your fight he had also retreated back to his room, not exactly sure how to ever face you again. A day later he was at lunch with Mingyu, Cheol and Joshua and they all looked at him like he had suddenly grown three heads. 

“I can’t believe you said that,” Joshua judged, shaking his head. Seokmin sighed, throwing his napkin on the table. 

“Come on, was it really that bad?”

“Yes,” all three of his friends said in union, all their eyes on him, no sign of humor. Seokmin swallowed. 

“I really thought I was doing the right thing,” he mumbled now, letting his head fall, eyes studying the pattern of the wooden table.

“By doing what? Pushing away a girl that’s absolutely crazy about you? That has been nothing but kind and wonderful towards you? That you very obviously have feelings for?” Mingyu snorted, crossing his arms, “no, that most certainly wasn’t the right thing to do, Seokmin.”

While Seokmin stayed silent, Seungcheol and Joshua nodded, telling Seokmin, once again, that he was an idiot. It was no use, though. He already knew he was! He knew he had messed up and even though a part of him still thought that, maybe, his intention had been noble, the part was slowly but surely getting kicked out. 

“And what do you expect me to do? I can’t just go up to her and tell her that I was wrong for saying that. She doesn’t even talk to me!”

“Can’t really blame her, can you?” Seungcheol took a sip from his iced tea.

“Look, it’s only been a day. Let her calm down, give her space. Give yourself some more time to come up with the right thing to say. I’m sure it will be fine, you and Y/N will be fine.”

And as much as Seokmin appreciated the tough love followed by Joshua’s words of affirmation, he wasn’t sure it was really helping him. In fact, he wasn’t sure what could help him considering you started ignoring him from then on, even avoiding your shared space to either stay at Seungkwan’s place or just come home once Seokmin was already in bed. Every class you had together, you would sit right by one of the doors, arriving at the latest and leaving as soon as possible. Whilst Seokmin was trying his hardest to come up with a way to apologize to you, to win you back, you were trying your best to forget about your feelings for him. And for the most part it was even successful - you being mad at him and feeling like an idiot whenever you thought about the kiss you two had shared. But then again, only for the most part. 

“You can’t just force yourself out of love with someone,” Seungkwan said on the nth night you’ve been sitting on his couch, a bucket of ice cream in your arms, the AC on the highest setting because, holy hell, was it hot outside. 

“I can try,” you shrugged, staring at the TV screen. Seungkwan sighed, letting his eyes wander over your frame. You didn’t look your best, the hurt definitely coming through with bags under your eyes, your hair looking frizzy, the shirt you were wearing a stain right in the middle and when he had asked you about it, you couldn’t even tell him where that had come from. 

So, when he got a call from Kim Mingyu two days later, he was eager as ever to meet up and hopefully get you off his couch. 

The setting was in a small coffee shop, Seokmin seated nervously next to Mingyu who had ordered an iced americano for each of them. Seungkwan looked from one handsome guy to the other, clearing his throat.

“So, I’m guessing this is about Y/N?” he raised a brow and Mingyu quickly nodded, while Seokmin shifted on his seat, hands clasped around his plastic cup. 

“Yup. Do you have any idea what Seok over here can do to, you know, get her to speak to him again?” Mingyu pointed at Seokmin with his thumb and Seungkwan chuckled as he watched Seokmin slap the thumb away, his cheeks a bright red.

“I’m sorry, I would’ve never come to you about this, but I’m desperate at this point. She is never home and when she is, she makes it her mission to not even acknowledge my existence.”

“Yeah, when she’s not home she is at my place. And let me tell you, it’s getting incredibly annoying, considering I have a “not-boyfriend” that I’d really like to invite over,” clicking his tongue, Seungkwan leaned back and grabbed his own beverage, taking a sip from the bright blue straw, “so, I am more than happy to help.”

For a few minutes they brainstormed, Mingyu suggesting that maybe Seokmin should just ambush her, maybe get a pair of handcuffs and- yeah, he was shut down by both Seokmin and Seungkwan rather quickly. Seokmin said that maybe he should just continue texting her and that perhaps she’d come around, but Seungkwan shook his head, telling him there was no use, he had never met anyone worse at texting and reading texts than his best friend. 

After a moment of silence in which they all seemed a bit defeated, Seungkwan watched Mingyu take out his phone and open a message he had received on instagram. The only blonde at the table had never been quicker to sit up and almost knock over his drink.

“I know what you have to do.” 

-

It had been two weeks since you had last talked to Seokmin and for once you were inside your apartment, knowing that he was at class while yours had been canceled. It was nice to be back home during day time for a change, your feet propped up on the small coffee table in front of the sofa. A book in your lap that you had discarded for a bit to check your phone, only to be hit in the face by a cruel, cruel reality. The book slipped off your lap as you withdrew your legs from the table and instead kneeled on the couch, both hands gripping your phone tightly. 

“He has got to be joking,” you mumbled, feeling dizzy as you stared at the mirror pic Seokmin had posted half an hour ago. He hadn’t posted in months. Basically since he and Hyerin had broken up. His insta was mainly blank except for a few pictures he had taken of pretty sceneries. Never had he ever posted gym selfies. No. That had been Mingyu, showing off Seokmin’s body in his pictures as well as his own. 

To be fair, there wasn’t much body to see on the selfie. It was him in the gym, his long sleeved shirt rolled up above his elbows, showing enough arm to make you head feel crazy. His left hand was holding his phone, his fingers spread over it and, fuck, his hand. His hair was just slightly messy, his jaw and neck on full display and you forgot how to breathe. Arousal pooled in between your legs now and you honestly couldn’t even understand why. Perhaps, you thought, because this was the first time you had seen his face in almost two weeks and this picture just fed into all of your small kinks about him. Swallowing hard, you licked your lips and continued to bury your teeth into the bottom one, your pussy already throbbing. How pathetic. Little did you know you were about to become even more pathetic. Only now did your eyes spot the small symbol on the right side of the post, signaling you that there wasn’t just one picture. With a throat as dry as the desert, you clicked back on the post, a shaking index finger swiping to the left, only to be met by what could only be described as worse. There you had the body you had so desperately wished for. Leaned back on what you assumed to be a bench press, his legs adjourned in baggy jeans you had seen him wear a handful of times. Back then you had been happy to not see them on him this much because for whatever reason he was even more sexy in them. They weren’t even tight (as baggy jeans already suggested), but they still seemed to fit him perfectly. And now, with him manspreading over a bench in the gym, the red-white shirt with a car race theme, sleeves still rolled up, one arm hanging over his right thigh, holding onto the black leather beneath him, showing off a pretty vein you could literally already feel underneath your tongue. He was crazy. Crazy and mean and horrible and you knew all of this on purpose. His fingers on display, his thighs looking so big in those god forsaken jeans. Hair messy, jawline looking so sharp you were sure it could cut glass.

And as if all of this wasn’t bad enough, you suddenly heard the door clicking open. Your head jerked up, your eyes wide and your cheeks flushed burgundy. When you saw Seokmin walk through the door and finally into the living room, you felt your phone slip from your hand and onto the couch. He was carrying a gym bag, his hair still slightly damp. His skin was glowing and his eyes were widened in surprise. He most definitely hadn’t expected to see you.

“I thought you had class?” He said, his gym bag dropping onto the floor next to him. You slowly got up from the couch.

“Got canceled. Yours?” 

“Same.”

Nodding, you came to a stop in front of him, his tall figure towering over you, your chest heaving, head clouded by the smell of his cologne, of the knowledge he had posted that picture most definitely to get to you. With a heartbeat the speed of light, you looked into his eyes.

“Did Seungkwan tell you to post those pictures?” you whispered. Seokmin hesitated. Then he nodded. 

“Did it work?” he asked, head slightly tilted to the side. 

Instead of answering, your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him down to crash your lips against his. Seokmin immediately reacted, hands on the small of your back, pushing you closer. This kiss was different from the first, not less exciting or dizzying, but you felt more in control, felt more like this was it, this was what you had craved for so long. 

Seokmin, meanwhile, was on cloud nine, your lips feeling so incredible on his. For him this was all he had wanted for the last weeks and while he had gotten that small taste back then, nothing could have prepared him for what he was feeling right now. All sense of self control left his body as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding over your bottom lip, asking to be let in. Once your tongues touched, there was no way in hell this was going to end. You moaned into his mouth, your nails digging into his skin while he moved his hands down, wrapping around your thighs to lift you up. Instinctively your legs swung around him, his hands leaving burns where he touched you. 

He moved over to the couch where you had sat before, sitting down with you now straddling him, both of your hands roaming around the other’s body. You let your fingers slide under his shirt and together you took it off, lips parting momentarily and letting you admire his toned chest, his abs and shoulders. You took your sweet time, fingers caressing his skin while your lips latched onto his neck, sucking harshly. Seokmin moaned, one hand on the back of your head, while the other laid on your thigh. 

With every passing second you felt yourself grow wetter, your hips beginning to grind down, both of your clothed crotches meeting, making both of you even more desperate. Seokmin grabbed your face, kissing you passionately once more, thumbs on either side of your cheeks. You whimpered when you felt him buck up, his erection already making your head spin. Never had you ever wanted anyone as bad. Finally, his hands moved to take off your shirt, leaving you in shorts and nothing else. A groan escaped him, hands all over your breasts, lips sucking your hard nipple inside his mouth, your head falling back, hands digging into his scalp. He was devouring your tits one at a time, hands squeezing them harshly as you couldn’t help but move your hips against him.

“S-Seokmin, please,” you whined, the arousal literally audible. Hearing you say his name like this… Seokmin parted from your chest and instead looked up at you. 

“Seungkwan told me something,” he whispered, one hand now moving down, while the other was back on your face, “he told me you take a… certain liking to my fingers.” The smirk on his face made you forget to kill Seungkwan later. You licked over your lips, biting down on it after, only to let out a small gasp when his right hand slipped into your shorts, pressing down on the wet spot between your legs. He sucked in a breath.

“Fuck, arren’t you wet for me, angel?” He whispered, while his other hand moved to your lips now, his eyebrows shooting up as he held eye contact. You knew what he wanted and you were more than eager to oblige. Parting your lips and stretching out your tongue, Seokmin felt himself twitch as he laid his index and middle finger on top of your tongue.

“Suck,” he then ordered you and without thinking twice, you did as asked. The fingers were long and thin and perfect and your eyes rolled back when you felt him press down on your tongue, his eyes becoming a little crazier with every passing second. 

“Both your holes stuffed with my fingers, what do you think?” his voice made goosebumps erupt all over your body, moaning around his digits while nodding wildly. Seokmin chuckled, not saying anything as he shoved your panties to the side, your hips almost automatically lifting so he could coat himself in your juice, his cock growing harder with every inch of him that got blessed with your arousal. 

“Think you can take two already?” when you nodded again, he immediately let his pretty fingers sink into you, both of you moaning at the contact. He sank in as deep as he could, until every bit was inside of you, knuckles deep, making him feel like he was either going to cum in his pants or simply explode. 

“God, you feel so fucking good, angel. Common, fuck yourself on my fingers and don’t forget to suck.” 

Your body began moving right away. Your mouth was sucking his fingers as if they were his cock, tongue pressing, tongue flicking against them. Head bobbing back and forth as your hips moved up and down on his other hand, his fingers feeling heavenly inside your walls. And when he put his thumb on your clit, you were sure the heavenly feeling would soon get you to cum all over him. 

“Good girl, doing so well for me, fuck,” Seokmin felt his throat dry up, sweat forming on the top of his head. How badly he wanted to fuck you right now, just get his fingers out and replace them with his throbbing cock - but he wanted to take his time with you. He wanted to see you live out your dream with his fingers buried inside of you, with your saliva coating his one hand and your perfect, sweet arousal the other. He wanted to see you come undone like this, fucking yourself on his fingers, before he took you the way he wanted, making you scream his name and beg him to make you cum with his cock. 

You felt your orgasm closing in on you, your movements becoming sloppier, eyes rolled back and the fingers in your mouth almost forgotten. Once Seokmin noticed, he grinned, beginning to fuck them inside your mouth himself, a high pitched moan escaping you and making another bit of precum shoot out of Seokmin’s cock. 

“Yeah, are you close, baby? Come on, I know you want to cum for me.” He leaned forward, the angle of his fingers changing slightly, hitting you right where you needed him and when his lips began kissing and licking at your neck, you couldn’t help but cum hard, your pussy clenching around his fingers over and over again, milking yourself for all you had. 

“Fuck,” he was in a daze, pulling both sets of fingers outside your holes, eyes searching for yours, before closing his lips around the fingers that had just made you cum so beautifully. You whimpered, pussy throbbing at the sight of him licking your arousal from his own digits. 

“Seokmin…,” you cried out and he pulled his fingers back, instead shooting forward now to kiss you again. You could taste yourself on his lips, hands now back around his neck, eyes closed shut as he kissed you with delicious desperation. 

“Fuck me on the windowsill, Seok, please.” 

He parted from you only for a second, before nodding and kissing you again, getting up with your legs wrapped around him, finally placing you on the narrow sill, hands gripping your shorts and panties and pulling them off your legs. You watched as he opened his own jeans next, letting them fall to the floor before finally revealing what you had only imagined so far. You couldn’t help but stare, your mouth watering at the sight of his big cock, all red at the tip and veiny, thick and a little bent to the left. Oh, how much you wanted him to ruin you. 

“I can’t wait to fuck you, baby,” he purred now, arms back around your body, lips closing around yours again. Every inch of you was on fire, your hands immediately finding his cock, one grabbing his balls, while the other was around his girth, moving up to let your thumb slide over his slit. He twitched in your hand, a beautiful moan coming out his mouth that had you shivering. Spreading your legs further, you brought his leaking cock to your lips, letting the tip circle your clit for a bit, both of you moaning into the other's mouth, before finally lining him up with your sopping core.

“Please, fuck me, I need you so bad,” your voice was muffled against his lips and he nodded, replacing your hand with his to push inside you, the stretch having your nails dig into his shoulders, whimpers escaping your pink lips as he lowered himself into you until he bottomed out, his forehead now pressing against yours.

“You feel so good, so perfect around me, baby,” he kissed you softly, hands sliding over your sides up to your tits, and once he began squeezing them again, his lips finding yours, he began thrusting, first deep and hard, before he quickened, your legs pulling him even closer. He was perfect. The way he held you, the way his thumb was on your nipple, lips now sucking on the sensitive skin on your neck, cock fucking you deep and hard and quick, leaving no room for complaints. You didn’t know how to ever stop moaning his name, how to be quiet, how to not have your body already signal another climax. 

“A-am close,” you whined and Seokmin nodded, head now in between your neck and shoulder, kissing every inch of your skin. Nothing had ever felt this good, no sex with anyone had ever made him feel as if  he was going to cum within seconds, while also wanting it to never end. He sped up once more, hands back on your face as he wanted to cum with your tongue inside his mouth, with your lips claimed as his. You tried to match his pace, desperate and breathy moans filling the air that already smelled like nothing but sex. There was nothing you could do to prevent the orgasm rushing over you, your walls clenching around his cock over and over again, his movements getting sloppier with every second, your and his salivas mixing, running over both your chins when he finally sucked your tongue into his mouth as he came, hot white cum spreading in your pussy that now milked him for all he had, every little drop as precious as the other. 

“Fuck, oh my god,” Seokmin breathed into your mouth, his hands caressing your hair as he kissed your neck, both of you slowly getting down from your highs. You two stayed like this for a while. Him, kissing your neck, your shoulders, your chin and finally your lips. It suddenly feels like everything has fallen into place perfectly, like this is what should have happened the first time he ever stepped into place, maybe even when you first laid eyes on him three years ago. He stays inside you, your combined releases only slowly dripping out of you. How could he make you feel this precious? This fragile in the best way?

“Y/N…”, he then whispers after a while, his hands next to you on the sill, his eyes so soft and yet full of guilt. For a second you think he regrets having done this but then you hear his next words.

“I’m so sorry I pushed you away. I never should have done that. I was scared of my own feelings and of taking advantage of you, and I get now that I should have just talked to you about this instead of acting like I was protecting you when in reality I was just protecting myself,” he caressed your face, a stray lock of hair finds it’s way behind your ear by his finger.

“I get it. And I’m sorry too, for, you know, completely shutting you out.” You smile weakly and Seokmin chuckles, kissing your cheek again.

“I would have done the same. So, you forgive me?”

“Isn’t you coming inside me enough reason to believe I have?” You tease him with a slight grin and he turns red, looking down at him still buried inside your warmth. 

“Thank you. For forgiving me,” he looks up at you, a mischievous glint in his eyes, “and also for letting me cum inside you.” 

You start laughing, pushing him away slightly by the shoulder and your heart seems to jump out of your chest when he kisses you again. You were sure  that you’ll never get tired of doing this. 

-

“So, if i want you to get turned on I’ll just need to post more gym pics?” Seokmin’s arm was around you, both of you freshly out of the shower seated on the couch. You scoffed, but felt your cheeks heat up.

“Shut up,” you couldn’t help but smile though, the fact he was so close to you, holding you. It was all too much but in the best way possible. You never wanted to let this man go again. 

“You’re so cute when you’re flustered”, he giggled now, and god, had you ever heard a more adorable sound? You doubted it. Just when you were about to respond (mainly to tell him to shut up again), you heard your phone ring. Looking over Seokmin’s lap, you saw your phone where you’d left it. He followed your gaze and grabbed your phone for you, a knowing smile on his lips.

“If we were to unlock this now, what would we find, hm?”

Ignoring him, you finally picked up. It was Seungkwan.

“Hi traitor,” you said, eyebrows raised. Seungkwan scoffed on the other side.

“Oh please, you can’t tell me y’all didn’t fuck.”

Seokmin, who was very obnoxiously leaning in closer to hear the conversation, giggled again, his cheeks turning rosy. You rolled your eyes.

“Doesn’t mean I appreciate you spilling my kinks to people you barely know.”

“You know you do kind of love me for it though. So, you two together now?” You froze in place, while your eyes moved very slowly to look at Seokmin. What you saw made your stomach turn and twist and tumble and millions of butterflies suddenly started dancing Gangnam Style. His eyes were so fond, his features soft, the rose on his cheeks now accented by his bright perfect smile. When he nodded, his hand coming to caress your head, you couldn’t help but smile the brightest you ever had.

“As a matter of fact, yes. Yes, we are.”

[bkglovergirl]

Hi there! So I was wondering if you could make a fic about bakugou x reader, where she and bakugou were childhood friends similar to him and deku, but the reader has been obvious about her crush on him, always complimenting him, telling him she likes him, even going to UA with him.

He would always straight up rejects her but lowkey likes her, (moving forward to kats arc where hes being a better person lol) the reader still makes him bentos from time to time, always follows him but it doesn't seem to 'irritate' him as much (hes just so happy with her always taking his side), patching him up ect. you get the picture

that is until a girl from class B started taking a liking to bakugou as well and theres a senario where reader gets the wrong idea and think that they're dating class B bitch who always tries to get on her nerves, but in reality bakugou straight up rejects her

reader changing bla bla bla, bakugou being like "WHYD YOU STOP BABYING ME STUPID ASS??!"

readers like "wtf?" bakugous like, "if you we have a problem talk to me, im your bf after all"

sorry if its long. i had a wonderful dream id like to relive ❤️

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Bakugou X Reader

Childhood friends to lovers

I love the miscommunication trope, the ending is a little bit different.

Word Count: 2.3k

ೃ⁀➷

Ever since you could remember and much to Bakugou’s dismay you, Deku, and him have been childhood best friends. One thing is very well known between the trio. You have the biggest crush on Katsuki Bakugou. You make sure it’s known. The first time you realized you liked him, you told him almost right away. You both were around the age of seven and were at a playground fooling around. Neither of you guys had gotten your quirks and you “trained” at this particular playground every day whenever you could. You were running chasing the “villain” Deku around and around. Both your faces had dirt covered and you knew with how your clothes looked your mom was gonna be upset at you but who cares? You didn't.

“I’m gonna get you!”

“Nuh-uh!” Deku runs behind the slide and you follow after. 

“Boo! Huh?” He had disappeared, quickly you looked around and saw him running up onto the base of the playhouse and into one of the small tunnels that connect the two. You run after. Not paying attention you miss one of the steps on the stairs and fall. Bakugou close behind went to go catch you and it was right then and there his quirk manifested and burned your arm as he grabbed you. “Ow! Ow!” You whined looking up at Bakugou. 

“Are you okay?!” Deku comes running back down towards you both and you are slightly dazed so Bakugou asks again, “Are you okay!”

“Your quirk! Bakugou your quirk!!” 

“I KNOW STUPID BUT ARE YOU OKAY?” You and Deku both give each other a look before looking at Bakugou. 

“Yes, I’m okay!” you lied. “Bakugou, your quirk!” He smiled, and it was almost like you watched his ego form right then and there. 

‘Hell yeah, I got my quirk before you two!' He turns and puts his arm out away from you guys and gives a small blast. “Look how cool it is!” After some of the excitement dies down, you manage to beg Bakugou to give you a piggyback as he walks you home after you both drop off Deku. “I don’t see the point in this.” He adjusts you on his back a bit to make it more comfortable for himself.

“Think of this as payback.” You giggle as you hear him groan. “Hey Bakugou?”

“What.”

“I like you.”

ೃ⁀➷

Years later you guys got into UA together and lucky for you and Izuku, in the same classroom as well. Confessing to Katsuki happens at least every other week, and him rejecting you happens every time. You both have gotten into a schedule. You’d walk to school and on certain days bring him a Bento box. You’d go to class and try and do everything with him if Mr Aizawa allows it. At the end of the day, Katsuki always walks you to your dorm before walking to his. 

You knock on Katsuki's door and hear some grumbling before he answers the door, “Why can’t I get you at your dorm? Why do you always come to mine?” You shrug and hand him the Bento box you made him. “You gotta stop making these.”

“You say that, but you love it!” he rolls his eyes and takes it out of your hands. You both start walking to class together. “So I was thinking you and I could pair up because I heard Izuku and Todoroki are gonna pair up.” 

“Why do you always wanna pair up together.” “To save you from the embarrassment of not getting picked.”

“I would get picked!”

“Absolutely not.” You go to open the door to the classroom but Katsuki quickly opens it for you, you smile and walk in. 

You follow him to lunch and sit next to him. He grumbles his small complaint but quickly eats the food he complained about. He never says thank you or compliments the food, but you know he appreciates it by how empty he leaves the bento once he’s done. “It’s cold.”

“Stop complaining, maybe you should have brought your jacket.”

“Alright asshole my fault I forgot it!” The bickering goes back a forth a bit before you stand up, “Walk without me I need to talk to Denki about something.”

“Whatever.”

ೃ⁀➷

You switch the song on your phone before putting it in your skirt pocket and walk to class. You smile seeing Katsuki ahead of you and run to catch up but stop quickly. Katsuki is handing a girl his jacket and she’s smiling at him. Your heart sinks and you feel nauseous as you watch him open the door for the girl. You look at his face. ‘Is he blushing?!’ you bite the inside of your cheek and walk into the classroom. You hear Katsuki call after you but you ignore him. The small banter between you two is non-existent and the whole class quickly takes notice because you are uncomfortably quiet. The notes Katsuki passes to you go unread and you push them off your desk. Katsuki is panicking in his head, he is going through every single thing he’s done today and he can’t think of anything he has done wrong. You were fine at lunch and if anything happened you wouldn't ignore him, if anything you'd whine and complain to him about it. To Katsuki’s surprise, he’s really annoyed you aren't complaining to him. The bell rings and you quickly stuff your bag with all your things and speed walk to the door. “Hi is Katsu there?!” of course, you would run into her and Katsu?! Who the fuck does she think she is? Everyone is staring at the two of you, you step to the side to let the girl in and she runs up to Katsuki. “Katsu!” Your classmate's eyes follow the girl and look at you thinking the same exact thing you are. You shrug and walk out.

ೃ⁀➷

The next morning you walk to the classroom by yourself. Denki and Izuku come to check on you but you wave them off saying you are okay. Before they both walk away you quickly ask Denki to be partners in training. He gives a look to Izuku before agreeing. Katsuki walks in minutes later, late. He tries to talk to you but Aizawa tells him to get into his seat and he obeys. 

Training starts a couple of hours later, and just like you guessed, no one wants to partner with Katsuki. He watched as you walked over to Denki when Aizawa announced that you all should grab partners. He’s crushed but shakes it off. His pride stops him from walking up to you. Kirishima takes one for the team and partners up with Katsuki. The training goes well, and surprisingly, you and Denki are a great team.

“I think we should be a team more often, Y/N!” You smile, agreeing with him. The next set of teams that are put against each other are You and Denki vs. Kirishima and Katsuki. During the whole fucking battle you manage to avoid Katsuki, you don’t know how you manage to pull that off and neither does he because he tried so hard to come after you specifically. By the end of the battle you and Denki come out victorious and Katsuki is pissed. Katsuki rips off his gauntlet looking at you and Denki walking off together and talking.

“Denki I-”

“Kaminari.” he corrects.

“Kaminari.” You smile. “I just don’t get it. Who the fuck is that girl?! Where did she come from? I’m with Katsuki so much how did I not notice there was another girl.”

“Doesn't he reject you all the time?”

“A part of me doesn't like it’s a rejection. He likes the things I do for him, but his rejection seems like a wait, not a no.” you put your hands up to your face, “I’ve liked him since we were little. The memory of me first liking him is imprinted into my body! How do you just get over that? How do you get over Katsuki Bakugou.” Kaminari puts his hand out to stop you from walking into a wall. You look at him and his face is looking at you with confusion.

“What do you mean by imprinted?” You roll up your sleeve and show him the big scar that was left on your body. 

“This happened when his quirk first manifested. It was by accident and instead of celebrating his quirk he made sure I was okay first.”

“That doesn't sound like Bakugou.”

“I KNOW!” You rest your back against the wall, and Kaminari leans against it facing you. You don’t know how long you talked, but at some point, the talking turned into scheming. Katsuki comes walking up and the girl is right next to him talking away and honestly, he’s annoyed. It takes everything in him not to scream in her face. He sees you first. Then he sees Kaminari leaning against the wall next to you. At the same time, you see him first. Then the girl walking next to him. He takes note that he’s changed and cleaned up after training, you guys aren't even changed out of your hero outfits and are still all messy. The training ended an hour ago. He stops walking which the girl next to him takes as a green light to wrap her arms around his arm. Kaminari notices and quickly stands in front of you to block your line of view.

“Don’t look it’s only gonna hurt more.”

“Come to my dorm.”

“What?”

“Come to my dorm right now.” You grab his arm and drag him away aggressively. Kaminari has to stop himself from complaining your grip hurts.

ೃ⁀➷

Katsuki got up early enough to get to your dorm room. He knows this is the time you leave, he knows your exact schedule to the T. He knows your whole life and who you're close with so he’s honestly so fucking confused why you walk out of your dorm room and run up to Denki fucking Kaminari. On top of that, you hand him a bento box. His fucking Bento box. He’s stunned and stands there like a dumb ass watching as you walk away with him.

Class is giving him a headache. He just feels the need to take as many pain pills as he can. You and Denki have been joking around non-stop and it doesn't help that you sit in front of Katsuki and Denki sits in front of you. The class feels like forever. There is no training today so it is just class and he doesn't know how long he can just sit here and watch as you painfully ignore him. He concludes he’ll talk to you before lunch but that plan is quickly foiled as the girl from class 1B comes barging into the classroom like she owns the place and attaches herself to him. Katsuki watches as you stare a second before Kaminari puts an arm around your shoulder and walks you out of the room as quickly as he can. He makes a new plan that he’ll talk to you at lunch but that plan is also quickly ruined as the girl blocks him at his table so he can’t get up and go to you. So as your plan goes perfectly, he gets a perfect view of you and Kaminari sitting and having lunch together. He then makes plan number three, he’ll follow you around until he gets the perfect moment to yell at you. It’s perfect. He follows you to class with the annoying girl talking away. He sits in pain the whole rest of class as he watches you and Kaminari fool around the whole time.

ೃ⁀➷

“Why are you following me around.” You turn to look at him. You landed at your childhood park once you realized Katsuki was following you around. It’s cold and you hug yourself.

“So she speaks.”

“Don’t be an ass Bakugou. Why are you following me?” Katsuki’s stomach sinks. At least he knows how you feel now.

“Bakugou?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“What’s wrong with me?”

‘Don’t act fucking stupid.” He takes off his jacket and gets closer to you, You take a step back. “See what I mean?! I’m trying to give you my jacket and you step away from me! What the fuck Y/N!”

“Sorry, I don’t want what another girl got.”

“What are you- oh…”

“Yeah oh! Kaminari told me I wasn't being stupid but maybe I am! Maybe I should have stopped liking you when you rejected me the first time! BUT NO!” you get closer grabbing his shirt, “You make it so fucking difficult to not be in love with you!” He stares at you and leans down, as much as you don’t want to, you push him away. “No this had gotta stop. I’m not gonna let you keep toying with me and I gotta stop being so delusional.”

“You aren't being delusional.”

“Really because that girl has gotten more attention than I have gotten from you in years. Every time I confess since we were kids you act like I didn't say anything!”

“I just wasn't ready for things to change.” you scoff at him.

“It was always going to change! Did you like dragging me along? Where did that other girl come from?” you sit down on one of the swings and kick some wood chips. Putting your hands on the chain.

“I just wanted to make sure I liked you and I wasn't just… I don't fucking know! You're the only girl who has been in my life that wasn't my mom!” you glare at him.

“Wow.”

“Listen Y/N, I know it was stupid but I just needed to know before our relationship changed and I fucked everything up.” “So what was this conclusion from your stupid fucking experiment?” Katsuki takes this as a green light to come closer to you. You don’t say anything.

“That no girl compares.”

“Wow, Romeo it took you that long?” Katsuki stands in front of you and puts his hand on top of yours. You look up at him.

“Yeah, I know.”

“I’m not confessing again.”

“I know.” He leans down and kisses you. 

[sansaorgana]

I was wondering if I could request something for modern!gwayne. perhaps a conflicting dynamic with helaena/aegon's friend from college if you're not uncomfortable with the age gap. if you are, perhaps something with him and a friend of alicent's - just something where we have the opportunity for a gentle, slow development <33

hi, darling! sorry that you had to wait a few days but I had a migraine on the day you sent it to me (and I was after my first ever botox appointment 🙈) and yesterday I was working on my thesis and ended up with a migraine again lol I was wrapping up my thesis today but, thankfully, I feel much better this evening 💚

thank you for sending this and I am fine with such an age gap, I think, since The Reader is supposed to be in college/uni whatever (I still don't get the difference 😂 in English)

just a reminder that this modern hotd au is supposed to be something quick and fun, so mostly headcanons and ideas, not full fics! 😊

more under the cut ✂️

-> I think it has more potential if you would be a friend of Aegon. 👀 More drama, if you get me… Because when you befriend Aegon and he starts to bring you home to do projects or presentations together, everyone thinks that you are his girlfriend and when you say "no, actually, we are FRIENDS" ,they just think you two need some time to realise that you are made for each other… 🙄

-> One time after classes when Aegon takes you home, his uncle Gwayne is there. and OF COURSE Alicent whispers to him that you are Aegon's "new girl".

-> Gwayne smirks at that and he teases both you and Aegon all the time but he is meaner than other family members… and it's not because he's from the mum's side of the family but it's because he finds you attractive and he's kind of butthurt that you are Aegon's "girl".

-> He wouldn't try to flirt with his nephew's girlfriend and steal her – he wouldn't want to hurt Aegon… So, he is just bitter and he hates the fact that the more he gets to know you (against his will), the more he likes you and the more attracted he seems to be to you…

-> And you? You instantly find him attractive. A handsome, rich, older guy who looks at you LIKE THAT? (it's difficult to hide the way he's staring).

-> At first, you didn't want to tell Aegon that you had a crush on his uncle because it would be awkward. But also, you thought there was no point of mentioning it because Gwayne was mean to you anyway… Not extremely mean but you know, he was teasing a lot and making ironic comments here and there. You knew that he fancied you but you thought it was purely physical and that overall he didn't like you at all.

-> However, one time you just admit to Aegon that you… KIND OF… have a crush on Gwayne Hightower and poor Aegon nearly chokes on his energy drink when he hears that. He looks you up and down because at first he wanted to laugh at you but then he realises that hey, you would actually make a good pair???

-> Because to Aegon you have always been "one of the boys" since you liked to joke around with him and all that but now, seeing your pretty little outfit, your make-up, your hands squeezing all those important books to read before the exam… Well, he has to admit that you look pretty mature and very feminine. Something he has never noticed before. 😂

-> Aegon assures you that it's not like Gwayne doesn't like you but he just acts this way towards everyone. You are not convinced but Aegon knows that his uncle probably thinks you two are dating, so he comes up with an idea.

-> He finds himself a girlfriend (it's easy for a guy like Aegon) and he starts bringing her around. Gwayne PANICS at first and keeps asking does it mean that you will not be showing up anymore??? But Aegon says that "no, of course she's gonna keep coming, she's my friend?".

-> So you do. You keep coming but now Aegon's girlfriend is jealous and acting like a bitch because you are everywhere and you are more comfortable at her boyfriend's house than she is. Not to mention, Aegon kiiiiiinda prefers to spend time with you.

-> Next part of the plan comes up to Aegon's mind. He asks his uncle to help him and to spend more time with YOU so his girlfriend is no longer jealous. Gwayne pretends that he agrees only for the sake of his nephew.

-> Few days later there's a big barbecue party in the garden of The Targaryens' mansion and you are invited, of course. You are standing by yourself and Aegon's girlfriend is killing you with her eyes when Gwayne approaches you and starts a kind conversation. He asks about your studies and talks about his job.

-> Before you realise, you have already walked away from the rest of the people and wandered with Gwayne to the more remote part of the garden. Without witnesses, he becomes a little bolder and starts to pay you compliments here and there and to his surprise, you seem to like them.

-> He picks up a flower from the garden to give it to you!!! And he playfully makes you promise that you won't tell Alicent about it (she would kill him).

-> He asks you to have a dinner with him soon and you agree. You exchange phone numbers but you don't actually expect him to call because why would such a cool man even call you? His nephew's college friend? No, it seems unlikely.

-> But he does. On the next Monday he calls you and invites you for dinner at the restaurant and you are nervous but you agree. Aegon is no longer in his relationship (lol), so he helps you to choose a dress and all that. You both decide that it's better to keep this whole thing a secret from Alicent so far.

-> Gwayne shows up in his expensive car to pick you up and he is a gentleman but he still jokes here and there in his typical way but you no longer mind that since you already know that he actually likes you. You even tease him back a few times, which he seems to enjoy.

-> The dinner goes well and he kisses you goodnight after taking you back home! You watch him drive away and the moment his car disappears from your eyesight, you take your phone out and text Aegon: "I'M GOING TO BE YOUR FUCKING AUNT."

[itaerae]

ooh! I have a request! All day, I kept thinking about Ricky x fem childhood bestfriend reader, 😭 where they were bestfriends when they wer younger and still are now, however, reader has always had this BIG crush on Ricky since they were young, she thinks that he doesn't like her back, BUT SHE DOESN'T KNOW THAT RICKY HASHAD A CRUSH ON HER EVEN BEFORE SHE LIKED HIM, SO LIKE- AHH

(I'm really sorry if this request is really specific TT. Take care and tysm!!)

dear diary 💭💭

pairing: crush!ricky x fem!reader

summary: another cliché childhood best friend turned lovers trope, or is it ? psst, who will spill their harbored secrets first ?

word count: 672

warnings: angst if you squint ! (not proofread)

notes: this was supposed to be posted a week ago, i apologize ᴖ̈ tysm for requesting ! i actually might rewrite this later bc i’m so tired from my concert rn and i feel like this is dookie lol, but for now enjoy this piece of trash !

it was safe to say you and ricky would always be inseparable ! you two have known each other since diapers and clicked well at first sight. however, you both were quite the opposite of each other.

ricky was rather quiet, he preferred to keep to himself in a close-knit friend circle. you on the other hand, obnoxious and outgoing ! you had many people left and right, but none could compare to ricky. maybe because you had a little crush on said blonde boy ?

not surprisingly, many girls on campus admired ricky. who wouldn’t ? you just happened to be one of them, but for the sake of your friendship, you’ve kept it a secret for a decade ! there was no possibility ricky could even like you back anyway, right ?

you were pretty sure he took a liking to some girl in his art class, you’ve caught them laughing and joking together, similarly to how he would with you. it made you feel mixed emotions, one being happy for ricky, the other wishes it was you instead.

today was no different, ricky informed you minutes beforehand that he had to ditch out on lunch with you today. you were upset, but let it slide. besides, you could really catch up with some other friends.

and that’s how you ended up at a table with gyuvin, ollie, and yujin. honestly, it could’ve been worse than this. as always, gyuvin and yujin were fighting and you and ollie would just ignore their little cat fights. you missed eating lunch with ricky, but this wasn’t so bad.

ollie was the sweetest person, he made sure the other two weren’t bothering you so much ! he would have definitely been your crush if ricky was around, the boy was so unintentionally cute ! you found yourself subconsciously pinching his cheeks.

not noticing the pouty blonde boy who was staring from afar, you continued your lunch with the trio. he was getting sour at you pinching ollie’s cheeks, how come you’ve never done that to him ? did you find ollie cuter ? he was dying to know, ignoring the poor girl from his art class.

it’s been a couple of days since you and ricky have talked. you were getting anxious, what if he was replacing you because he’d gotten a girlfriend ? the thoughts were eating away at your sanity.

similarly, ricky had thought you enjoyed hanging out with the trio more, so he made no attempt at contacting you in fear of being an interruption. it was a going cycle of ghosting until finally he couldn’t take it anymore.

the first thing he saw was you and ollie, giggling. he was upset, but brushed it off and continued his way over to you. “___, can we talk ?” his eyes were pleading.

you look at him, and then looked back to ollie with an apologetic face. “i’m sorry ollie, we can continue another time ?” the boy responded with a nod, wriggling his eyebrows. “that’s fine, have fun you two !”

ricky had taken you to some hidden garden at the back of the school. you were awestruck, how come you never knew about this place ? his voice snapped you out of your thoughts.

“___, are you and ollie you know.. a thing ?” he asked nervously, rubbing his nape. he looked so cute, you almost started laughing. he noticed and couldn’t help but worry.

“no silly, i’ve actually liked you for a while now but you haven’t seemed to noticed.” you put on a faux grim expression. ricky took the biggest sigh of relief. “you had me so scared, i’ve liked you for a while too you know !” he whined.

“okay, but what happened to that girl in your art class though ? i thought you liked her ?” you wriggled your eyebrows jokingly. “wow, way to ruin the moment, ___.” ricky rolled his eyes.

so dear diary, as always, she fell first, but he fell harder.

[theboookwitch]

Love Next Door spoilers below (and ranting that is not friendly to Seunghyo's character so if you don't want to partake, scrolling is free)!

It's actually so annoying how there are so many dramas that people love and adore that I just can't be obsessed with due to being a 34 year old with a fully formed frontal lobe and at least a decade of being treated terribly by men lol

Like I wanted to be obsessed with Love Next Door. I genuinely enjoyed the first like 4 episodes. I need to start out by saying the acting is incredible and I would die for Mo-eum and the reporter and his daughter. I deeply related to Seokryu as a burnt out older daughter with a difficult relationship with her mom and all of her family's expectations. I loved that in the first 4 episodes you could see that yes, while they did bicker, the genuine friendship and care was still there. And I typically love a "he fell first" moment. BUT...here is where my issues come into play.

I cannot fucking stand when it's a friends to lovers story and the man falls first and then goes on to treat the FL like actual dogshit bc she's not living up to the expectations in his head. Like Seokryu does not know that Seunghyo likes her. She continues to treat him like he's her lifelong friend that she deeply cares about. And at every single turn, he is acting like a petulant child. You can say "ohhh but he does all this stuff for her when she's not looking! it's so cuteeeee." I don't care. To her face, he keeps telling her things like that she needs to grow up and leave the past behind. When she brings him the food she makes on the first day of class and he turns it down in such a mean way and then gets all pissed off and jealous when her ex eats her food? I was so annoyed. He had ten fucking years to tell her he liked her and yes...timing was off and things were fucked, but that doesn't mean you can treat someone like that who has no idea why you're behaving like that. She looks so hurt and confused. And he gets mad at her for everything and instead of being an adult and communicating or just idk having the thought of like "oh my crush is my fault I can't take it out on her" he continues to be a dick. Telling her she needs to move on and they can't be close or whatever like he wasn't the one who remodeled her room and moved back to his parents as soon as she came back to Korea. Like he wasn't the one who told her the time capsule letter was a joke.

Idk maybe bc I've had close guy friends before who like ended up treating me like shit bc I allegedly friend zoned them when I genuinely thought we were friends but they got it into their heads that I owed them sex bc we were friends...but I can't handle that shit. If you cannot get your shit together and confess or if you cannot get over your feelings and treat a woman with the same respect you'd treat any friend, then it's hard for me to root for you. Also like...y'all ever notice that when women have unrequited feelings, we don't tend to be assholes to the person we have the feelings for? Bc we don't automatically assume we deserve their love and attention?

Also, even before he finds out about her diagnosis, he knows that she's at least going through a massive break up, work burnout and quitting a job and also moving back home - like if he's allegedly her best friend...why does he treat her like that when she's going through it? If he loves her so much, how is he making this like super rough time in her life completely about him? I get it - he also has trauma and was raised with parents who do not talk and that I'm sure has informed his life. I understand. Truly. BUT!!! While trauma can be a reason for your actions, it is not an excuse to then go ahead and be a dick to people around you.

Also...his reaction to her diagnosis...once again making it about himself and his hurt? That is not the move. I don't care if he is scared and angry and hurt. I don't give a fuck about his feelings. SHE HAD CANCER!!!!!!! AND HER ALLEGED BEST FRIEND WHO LOVES HER CALLED HER PATHETIC!!!!!!! HELLO?????

If that happened to a friend of mine, I would hunt that man down and beat him to a pulp.

Once again, I will say that the acting is amazing. I love Jung Haein and Jung Somin. BUT when thinking of this stuff in reality, I just was getting so mad every episode. There are so many ways to get around or get over feelings without being an absolute asswipe.

Sorry I needed to rant bc I haven't seen one post of anyone thinking anything is wrong with his behavior. Just tons of posts talking about his feelings...weirdly enough, I've seen people call Seokryu selfish. Love how that happens.

Anyways, I'm gonna wait for the fanfic where Seokryu ends up with his ex and they live a beautiful lesbian life making beautiful pottery and beautiful food and beautiful love.

[freezerbrldes]

A Long, Unfortunate while

PAIRING. Lucy Gray Baird x Coriolanus Snow

WARNINGS. Mentions of abuse and SA (not too in-depth but its still there)

AUTHOR'S NOTE. This is my first time writing and using Tumblr so please bear with me lol. This series is based on the album Preacher's Daughter by Ethel Cain. If you're unfamiliar with that album I highly recommend listening to it because it is honestly one of the greatest albums in the last decade. I changed some of the story up so it's not so predictable for people who know the lore behind the album. Also, I made Lucy Gray 18 years old and Coryo 20 years old for the sake of this story because it gets pretty dark towards the end (iykyk).

credit to @cafekitsune for dividers

now on ao3

Chapter One: American Teenager

I stand before the mirror, amazed at how the rainbow dress paired with the cream-colored corset and subtle makeup transformed my features. I’m not one to dress up, but since I’m attending the homecoming dance with Billy Taupe, I need to wear something other than my usual oversized t-shirts and baggy jeans. 

Never in a million years did I think he’d ever ask me out, let alone as his homecoming date. Billy and I grew up together in Shady Grove, a very small town in rural Alabama. We’ve never been close friends in school, but I always had a huge crush on him. He is the star player on the football team and is by far the most sought-after guy in school. 

Billy had been dating Arachne Crane, the captain of the cheer squad and the local bitch of Shady Grove High. He caught her making out with Fetus Creed under the bleachers after a game a few months ago, he broke up with her right on the spot. Since then he has talked to me more than he ever has. I didn’t think much of it until one day after chemistry class he stopped me in the hallway and asked me to homecoming. I was shocked but accepted anyway, hoping it would eventually lead us into a relationship.

I walked down the steps where my mother was ready with her Polaroid camera. 

“Oh my” she exclaimed, “You look beautiful.” She began snapping picture after picture, my eyes closed in almost every single one from how blinding the flash was. She grabbed my arms and tried to position me into a pose, taking even more pictures. After about 10 more photos, I had enough.

“Okay Mama, you got more than enough pictures, I need to go,” I say as I hear Billy pull into the driveway, honking the horn to let me know he’s here. 

“Let me go outside and say hi to the boy, I haven’t seen him in so long,” She says as she tries to open the door and walk outside. I immediately shut the door and blocked it with my body. 

“Please no, mama, he’s in a hurry and we gotta leave right now.” I began cracking open the door and inching my way through before my mother could get outside., not wanting her to embarrass men in front of Billy. 

Billy hops out of the truck and opens the passenger side door for me. 

“Wow, Lucy Gray, you look... stunning,” He says with a laugh as he looks me up and down. I blush at his words, not used to receiving compliments. 

“Thank you, Billy, you look great too” I replied. 

“Oh, Thanks,” Billy said. “It's the same suit I wore to your dad’s funeral.”

My heart sinks at his response.

My father passed away four years ago. He was the preacher at Shady Grove Baptist church for over 25 years. He was well respected around town. Everyone loved him and the services he led every Sunday. If only they knew what a monster that man was when he was not leading the congregation.

He and Mama did a good job of acting like they were happy together whenever they were at church or neighborhood cookouts, but no one could see the bruises that he would leave on my and Mama's bodies sometimes.

I shake myself out of my memories as Billy helps me into his truck and heads towards the school. The drive was mostly quiet. Every now and then he'll ask me about church or tell me about his recent football games, which I pretend to care about.

He parks the truck in the parking lot as I watch all the girls dressed in lavish ball gowns enter the school, they all make mine look insignificant in comparison. Billy helps me out of the truck and into the gymnasium. 

The room was filled to the brim with people, the DJ playing terrible remixes of various pop songs as people danced. I’m not a party girl, never even been to one other than birthday parties as a kid. The thought of the loud music mixed with sweaty bodies grinding against each other was enough to steer me far away from that lifestyle.

“I’m going to get us some punch, I’ll be right back,” Billy says as he maneuvers through the sea of people. 

I find an empty table in the corner away from all the commotion and make my way over to it. I take a seat and watch the crowd as everyone dances along to the music. Billy emerges from the crowd holding two glasses of red punch. 

“Thanks,” I say as I take the drink from him and have a sip. We sit in silence as the opening notes of Time After Time play. Billy looks over at me and places a hand over mine.

“Would you like to dance?” I look down at our hands and then look back at him. 

“Uh, sure, but I’ve never danced before,” I reply, my eyes avoiding his in embarrassment as I finish the last of my punch.

“That’s fine, I’ll teach ya” Billy stands from the table, his hand now holding mine, as he leads us to an empty spot on the dance floor. He places my hands on his shoulders before placing his on my hips. 

Billy began to sway us back and forth with the music and for a moment it felt like we were the only two people in the room. My confidence began to grow as I rested my head on his chest, listening to the beat of his heart instead of the music.

His grip on my waist got tighter as he pulled me closer to his body., my chest now flush against his. He begins kissing up the side of my neck as his hands move further down my waist and he grips my ass. I feel him snake a hand up my thigh and under my dress.

“Billy, what are you doing?” I muttered, trying to push his hands off of me, but his grip was too strong. At the same time, I began to feel a little dizzy, Did he put something in my punch?

"Just relax, baby," He whispers into my ear. He then grinds his crotch into my thigh as his hands search for the waistband of my panties.

"Billy, stop, let me go," I beg quietly, but he ignores my pleas.

Before he could get any further, a shrill voice spoke, causing Billy and I to both jump.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Lucy Gray Baird, what a surprise! I wasn’t expecting Billy to bring you to homecoming. I see he’s almost won the bet.” Arachne laughed, and her cheerleader friends giggled along with her. “Arachne, leave her alone,” Billy muttered, getting in between her and me. 

“Bet? What bet?” I questioned. “Billy, what is she talking about?” 

“I-It’s nothing Lucy Gray really-” 

“Billy made a bet with Festus that he could get laid by the preacher’s daughter,” Arachne interrupted, grinning widely. 

My face heated up as I felt tears well up in my eyes. This was all part of a bet? I thought to myself. I glared at Billy as he desperately tried to talk his way out of this.

“I-I wasn’t being serious, We were just joking around, I would never try to pressure you into anything I swear.” He stutters, his hand scratching the back of his neck.

“Did you really think Billy would ever go for you willingly?” Arachne snickered, “You look like a circus clown in that dress, and besides, the only reason he came here tonight with you is to get a quick 50 bucks”

“That’s not true, I came here with you because I-” Billy is cut off by Arachne’s giggling once again.

“Oh my god Billy, you like her?”

“N-no, I didn’t say that-” Billy adds, before he finished his sentence I turned away and headed towards the door. Before I could get to the door, Arachne cut me off and threw her punch all over my dress, staining it a dark scarlet red. I felt all eyes on me as she began to laugh. Soon it sounded like everyone in the room was laughing at me.

I pushed my way through the crowd and ran out the door and through the parking lot, walking down the empty, dark road. The sound of cicadas chirping in the trees surrounded me as I made my way down the street.

I had no clue if it was whatever Billy slipped into my punch, but all I wanted to do was run into the forest and let the wildlife consume me alive. Anything at this point would be better than facing everyone in class on Monday, especially Billy and Acrachne, but the thought of leaving Mama all alone, not knowing what happened to me quickly sucked me right out of that thought.

About 30 minutes into my walk, Headlights illuminate the road as they head towards me. An old beat-up pickup truck pulls over on the side of the road a few feet in front of me. As I walk past the window is rolled down to reveal a young man with long blond hair behind the wheel.

“You know, it's not safe to walk on the side of the road when it's this dark,” he says with a friendly smile,  “Do you need a ride?” 

I took a moment to think. I hear a lot of horror stories about women getting kidnapped from hitchhiking like this, but this guy looks very nice and he seems to be worried about my safety. There’s no a way crazed serial killer would ever be in a town this small anyway. 

“Yeah, I’d love that,” I answered as I approached the truck, getting into the passenger seat. I got in and gave him directions to my house, which was about 25 minutes away from the school. 

“My name’s Coriolanus, what’s yours?” He asks, I notice his accent is a lot different from anyone around here, he must be from out of town. 

“Lucy Gray,” I replied as he began to drive.

“Lucy Gray.. That’s a pretty name,” He smiles at me. 

“You don’t sound like you’re from here, where are you from?” I asked, looking over at his large collection of cassette tapes on the dashboard. From the looks of it, he must really like Metallica.

“I’m from Florida, I’m just passing through here on my way to California.” He answers as he lights a cigarette. 

“You’re driving from Florida to California? Isn’t that like a 40-hour drive?” I inquired, this man has to be insane or something to wanna do that all by himself.

“Yes, it's a very long drive,” he laughed. “My father was a truck driver and would always come home talking about how therapeutic driving all across America was, I’m hoping I’ll find it just as therapeutic as he did,” Coriolanus mutters, he looked almost sad for a second but quickly snapped out of it. "And there are so many more opportunities for me out there than there are back home."

I could almost sense the sadness in the air as he spoke about his father, he must have lost his father too. Almost like he knew I was going to question him about his father, he spoke again.

“May I ask what you are dressed up for?” He asks, glancing at my dress.

“I was at the homecoming dance tonight at school, my date was a dick so I left,” I said, playing with my hands in my lap as I spoke.

“God, that sucks,” Coriolanus replied, “well, he’s missing out big time, you are a very beautiful girl” he looks over at me and smiles sweetly. “What’s all that red on your dress?”

“My date’s ex-girlfriend decided to throw her drink at me before I left, I guess she was jealous that I went to the dance with him instead of her,” I said as I laughed slightly, feeling comfortable around Coriolanus as I spoke about my humiliating experience.

“Yeah, I imagine,” He says as he looks over my dress once more.

I watched Coriolanus as he continued to drive down the dark highway. He notices and quickly looks over, his eyes meet mine for the first time. I’m taken aback by his blue eyes are, they're almost as blue as a clear sunny sky. He smiles as I blush and look back down at my lap nervously.

“I’ve always dreamed of leaving Shady Grove, starting a new life in a big city somewhere,” I confessed. 

Coriolanus looked at me as I stared out the window.

“I know we don’t know each other at all,” he started, “but if you were up for it, you could join me on my trip.”

I looked over at him again, my eyes lit up. 

“You want me to stay?” I asked, a smile forming on my lips.

“I won’t force you into anything of course, but I could really use the company,” Coriolanus smiled, “I feel like I might go insane driving all by myself,” He laughs as he waits for me to answer.

Living in a small town, you’re not really taught to not talk to strangers. Everyone knows everyone, a little too much sometimes. Coriolanus seems like a genuinely good person, and he’s offering me a chance to escape, one that may never come again. I know my Mama would miss me, but once I get to California I’ll be sure to write her to let her know I’m okay. This is my one shot at leaving the town, and I'm not about to pass it up.

“I’d love to join you, Coriolanus,” I replied, grinning at him once again.

He looks at me, returning a smile.

“Well then, let’s get out of here, Lucy Gray.”

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

oh man ok i need to gush about moonlight chicken for a second lol

i adored how this show didnt shy away from the messiness of real life and relationships! like u hav a single gay working class man desperately trying to make ends meet and struggling with the guilt of his past lover having died tragically whilst bringing up his nephew who wants to be taken seriously and finally fly the nest to live his own life whilst at the same time navigating his crush on a lonely deaf boy who just wants to be understood and respected. and then you have a man stuck in relationship limbo where he's unable to let go of his past love but also yearning to move on and free them both from the pain they cause each other... and that's not even to mention the side characters who deal with the loss of parents, unfaithful partners, unplanned pregnancies, trying to be a better mother to your son, etc...

no one was a villain, instead you had a group of people who needed to grow and learn in a very natural way, and that's just so refreshing to see! honestly one of my fav parts of the story is that rather than inventing some arbitrary dramatic reason for wen and alan to break up, it just happened because their love had fizzled out, a thing that happens all the time in real relationships! and even though their love had died, it was still obvious that they cared deeply for one another which made both of them trying to move on so much more painful...

so much of this show was about the cycles of emotional abuse that can develop when you're stuck in the past... jim is unable to see a happy future for himself because he blames himself for beam's death, and he let's that anger and resentment inform how he treats li ming. wen is ignoring the messiness of his relationship with alan in favour of pursuing jim, but knows deep down that neither will be able to truly move on unless he deals with the situation. even heart's parents are stuck unable to relate to or be willing to understand their deaf son as they continue to isolate him from the outside world, thinking that it will protect him but all it does is make him even more lonely!

idk i just loved how the show focused so much on living in the moment. that the past is fixed and the future is uncertain, but there will always be now where you can always find some glimmer of joy and optimism.

and then there's ofc the queer element of the show where we get to see how internalised and external homophobia exist as perimeters to queer people being able to truly be themselves. one of the most heart wrenching scenes is at beam's funeral where his parents come up to jim and effectively tell him that because he and beam weren't married, he has no legal rights to any of the things they had worked so hard for together! and this is something you hear time and time again, both historically and now, where queer couples in countries that dont recognise gay marriage or even civil partnerships are denied so much (particularly when one of them dies) because their relationship is deemed illegitimate by law.

jim as a character has internalised this so much that when he finds out his nephew is gay, he lashes out (in one of the funniest scenes ever, mind you lol... literally the whole 'why are you gay, isn't being poor enough of a challenge!?' thing is gonna stick in my mind forever i love it sm lol) because he knows first hand how hard it is to be a queer man in a society that still doesnt fully accept you! (and it rly showed the disparity between him, a working class man, and wen, someone from a middle class/wealthy background when it comes to queerness that i don't think gets discussed as much... cos the fact of the matter is that for a long time queerness /was/ effectively reserved for wealthy people, as working class people wouldnt have had as much of a choice in how they could live their lives, so jim's reticence when it comes to accepting li ming's (and his own) queerness is directly tied to how being poor doesnt always allow you the luxury of simply 'being yourself'...)

and i think it was especially interesting that this show didnt present homophobia in individualistic terms. we don't get a character calling them slurs or saying that they're wrong for being gay, instead we get systemic and societal prejudices showing up in insidious ways, which feels so much more realistic! (like even jam, who is presented as having outdated and homophobic opinions, isnt presented as some evil villain. she's just a product of a homophobic society that teaches people being gay is a sad way of living, and she has to unlearn that as both her brother and son prove her wrong!)

i honestly could (and probably will) go on but yeh... this show man... this show

[writtenbymkl]

good person alternative ending

please read previous parts !

word count: 3.1k

a/n: i’m posting it here to make it easier for my friend to read BUT this is an alternative ending to good person IF the confession had happened 👍 it’s not proof read or anything i kinda just typed out what i felt LOL , i’m not too happy with it but i hope someone else will enjoy :D thanks for reading !! it’s kind of a long one :>

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

you sit at the lunch table with haechan and jaemin, enjoying a small break from classes. the atmosphere suddenly shifts when haechan speaks out of nowhere. his sudden declaration is surprising because he’s always been someone who had a partner by his side. he shrugs, trying to appear nonchalant as he states, “i’ve decided that i’m done with dating. it’s just truly not for me.”

jaemins looks at haechan with a skeptical expression implying he doesn’t believe what’s coming out of his mouth. you quickly intervene, smacking jaemin on the arm and saying, “come on, jaemin, we should support him!”

jaemin can’t resist teasing you and smirks, remarking, “of course you support that.”

haechan, confused by the exchange, looks back and forth between you and jaemin. sensing the tension, you shoot jaemin a warning glare, silently urging him to cut it out. if there’s anyone who let your crush slip, it would be jaemin and you can’t risk that happening.

just then, you notice mark sneak up behind haechan, a mischievous glint in his eyes. he swiftly pulls haechan’s hoodie over his head, momentarily blocking his vision. haechan whines, “that wasn’t funny, stop!”

you can’t help but burst into sudden laughter at the playful banter between them both. you can always count on mark to lift your mood. haechan pouts, feigning betrayal. “y/n, you’re supposed to be on my side, not mark’s,” he playfully complains, crossing his arms.

you apologize through your laughter, playfully rolling your eyes at the situation. “sorry, hyuck,” you say, still slightly laughing.

mark, seizing the opportunity to lighten the mood, makes a comment that he thought would help you out. “boyfriend and girlfriend have to stick together though, am i right?”

your eyes widen, shooting mark a warning look, silently telling him to cut it out. haechan, now even more confused than when jaemin previously spoke, looks at mark and asks, “what about our relationship? boyfriend and girlfriend?”

mark, unaware of the implications of his words, innocently responds, “well aren't you guys dating now? i thought you were after your breakup with mihye. didn’t y/n confess?”

your world feels like it’s crumbling around you as everything is suddenly out in the open. you’re not sure where mark even had the impression that you had confessed when you had clearly told him you were never going to tell haechan. you can’t function, your mind spinning with the potential consequences. tears start welling up in your eyes, and you can’t help but fall apart at that moment.

jaemin is frozen, not knowing how to handle the situation. he tries to downplay it, but you can only focus on sensing haechan staring at you from the corner of your eye, his confusion and concern evident.

mark, realizing the gravity of his words, starts apologizing profusely, but at this point, you can’t hear anything over the uneasiness in your heart. the only thing you can do is get up and say that you have to go, not bidding anyone goodbye. both jaemin and mark try to stop you, but you run off, leaving haechan in a state of shock.

—----------------------------

the courtyard is bathed in the soft glow of the setting sun, casting a warm, golden hue on you as you sit alone on a bench. your mind swirls with thoughts of the shattered friendship between you and haechan, a longing for the days when your bond was uncomplicated.

"i wish i could just go back to when i didn't like him," you whispered, your voice carrying a tinge of sadness.

just as you resign yourself to isolation, a familiar figure quietly joins you on the bench. it's mark, wearing a weak smile that barely hides his remorse.

"hey," he greets you softly, his voice filled with apology.

you offer him a small smile in return. the weight of your recent conversation hangs heavily in the air.

"dude, i'm like really sorry," mark says, his voice tinged with regret. "i never meant for things to turn out like this. i didn't realize what I was doing. i thought that you had like confessed or something."

your kind gaze meets his, filled with understanding. "i know, mark. it's okay. i forgive you. i could never be mad at you."

gratitude washes over mark's face as he breathes a sigh of relief. "jesus, thank you. i mean it. i swear i never wanted to cause any harm. like seriously,"

you sigh, her voice laced with sadness. "i just... i hope things won’t change between me and haechan."

mark's empathy shines through as he responds, "i get it. but you know, when i mentioned it, haechan didn't seem upset. if anything, he looked... different. almost happy."

confusion fills your eyes as you search for answers. "huh? are you suggesting that he might be happy about the confession?"

mark's uncertainty is clear as he replies, "well, i mean, i don't know for sure. but maybe you should talk to him, y/n. it could clear up stuff for you both."

shaking your head, you gently decline, "no, not now. i think he needs some space to process everything. when he's ready, we'll have the chance to talk."

understanding and support shine in mark's eyes as he sighs, "yeah, i get it man. whatever you decide, i'll support you. it's between you and haechan after all."

emotions overwhelm you as you embrace mark tightly, tears welling up in your eyes. you’re just grateful to have mark as a trusting friend and someone who will always be there for you no matter what.

"thank you, mark. thank you for being such a good friend," you whisper, your voice quivering with gratitude.

mark's voice, gentle and reassuring, echoes your sentiments. "always, y/n. i'll be here for you."

just as you both share this sincere moment, another presence slips in beside you, tucking their head into your shoulder, breaking the tender atmosphere. you turn your head in surprise to find jaemin, a mischievous smile playing on his lips.

"what are you doing here, jaemin?" you groan playfully, a mix of annoyance and affection coloring your voice.

jaemin's mischievous grin widens as he exclaims, "group hug!"

you sigh, unable to hide a small smile. "fine, whatever. you're a good friend too, i guess. at least you weren’t the one to slip up this time." mark lets out a quick ‘hey!’ before you let out a small laugh.

—-----------------------

a week later, and you find yourself surprisingly calm without haechan by your side. the days have passed, and although you still miss him, you understand the need for space and time to process everything that has happened. it's not easy to digest the fact that your childhood best friend has harbored feelings for you for years, and the revelation has left you in a state of introspection.

haechan continues to show up to class, not letting the newfound tension affect his attendance. however, he deliberately chooses not to sit next to you and mark, opting instead for a seat on the other side. at first, it tugs at your heartstrings, a pang of sadness settling in, but you remind yourself to be understanding. haechan needs his distance, and you don't hold it against him.

in class, you find yourself seated at the back, goofing around with mark. "mark, you dummy, that's not what we're supposed to be doing," you playfully scold him, smacking his shoulder lightly.

"dude, it makes sense to me, so i'll do what i want," mark retorts, a mischievous glint in his eyes. you lean your head on mark's shoulder, seeking comfort and support. in response, he wraps his arm around your shoulder, giving you a side hug. it feels reassuring to have a friend by your side during this uncertain time.

as the minutes tick away before class begins, everyone settles into their seats, preparing for the lesson ahead. suddenly, you feel someone slide into the chair next to you. lifting your head from mark's shoulder, you're taken aback to find haechan sitting there, visibly nervous, his eyes deliberately avoiding yours. confusion fills the air, and you exchange a puzzled glance with mark, both of you uncertain about haechan's sudden presence.

"do you... mind if we talk... after this?" haechan's words come out in a hurried and anxious manner. your face drains of color, and though a myriad of thoughts race through your mind, you find yourself nodding silently, unable to form words. haechan's expression relaxes, a sense of relief washing over him, and he offers you a soft smile before turning his attention back to the front of the classroom.

when the class finally comes to an end, you and mark begin to pack up your belongings. mark informs you that he has another class to attend, prompting him to bid you farewell.

"yo, i have my next class in a few. don't hesitate to shoot me a text or call, okay? i'll see you later. good luck," mark says, giving you a quick hug before making his way out.

curiosity gets the better of haechan, and he can't help but ask, "since when were you and mark so close?" he looks down, busying himself with shoving his school supplies into his backpack.

"we've always been close," you shrug, crossing your arms and waiting for him to finish his preparations.

with his backpack strapped securely on his shoulders, haechan suggests, "do you have any other classes after this? i'm done for the day." you shake your head, signaling that your schedule is clear.

"okay, let's go talk in the courtyard," haechan proposes, nodding towards the classroom door. you follow his lead as he guides you outside. as you finally arrive at the courtyard, you notice a familiar swing set from the nearby daycare. it seems like a fitting place for a heartfelt conversation. both of you take a seat on the swings, creating a momentary pause, an awkward silence hanging between you.

finally, haechan breaks the silence, his voice filled with a mix of apprehension and sincerity. "i'm sorry," he begins, his words weighted with regret. "I have a lot to apologize for, but I want to start by saying sorry for avoiding you the whole week." his gaze meets yours, guilt etched on his face. you simply shrug, finding it difficult to find the right words. deep down, you understand that all he wants to do is apologize and address any romantic implications that might have arisen.

"i'm also sorry for bringing mihye to your birthday get-together, for showing up late, and for not giving you a heads up until the last minute," he continues, his voice laced with remorse. with each apology, haechan's swinging motion gradually comes to a halt.

"it's okay," you say softly, your voice filled with forgiveness and understanding.

"and i'm mostly sorry for always burdening you every time my heart was broken," haechan adds, surprising you with his admission. your eyes widen, realizing that he perceived his emotional reliance on you as a burden. you never wanted him to feel that way. if anything, you cherished those moments when he sought solace in your presence, even if it meant jeopardizing your own happiness.

"don't ever apologize for that. that's what I'm here for, remember? never feel like a burden. I never wanted you to feel that way. it's the last thing I want," you say gently, emphasizing your unwavering support.

"it's my fault anyway," he sighs, his voice heavy with self-blame. "but that's not the only thing i want to apologize for," he continues, catching your attention. you look at him, confusion written all over your face, waiting for him to elaborate.

"can you let me apologize for hurting you?" haechan's request catches you off guard. the complexity of his emotions is evident, and he longs for your understanding and forgiveness.

“don’t start this, you didn’t hurt me, if anything i knew you would reject me from the start which is why i never wanted to say anything,” you say looking down to the ground. “so don’t feel bad, it’s not your fault you can’t have feelings for me, i totally get it.” all you can do is come clean at this point and hope that this won’t sour your relationship.

haechan's eyes widen in surprise as he listens to your words. he reaches out and gently lifts your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. his eyes are filled with a mixture of regret and longing, and you can sense the sincerity in his touch.

"no, that's not it," he says softly, his voice laced with conviction. "you're wrong. it's not that i can't have feelings for you. the truth is, i've been struggling with my own emotions, trying to make sense of them all."

confusion swirls within you, but you remain silent, giving him the space to explain.

"when we first met, i felt a connection—a bond that grew deeper every day. i mean look at us now, we’re two best friends…” he says soft laughing swinging on the swing. “but i was scared that you didn’t feel the same. i didn't want to ruin what we had, so i pushed those feelings aside, and just hoped they would pass as we grew up.”

you feel a flicker of hope within you, but it's quickly overshadowed by caution. the vulnerability in haechan's eyes is undeniable, yet you're afraid to let yourself believe that he could reciprocate your feelings.

“but what about the people you dated? i mean, inviting mihye to the get-together?” you asked with your brows furrowed in confusion.

“i thought that by getting into those relationships, i’d distract myself from my feelings for you. i wanted to convince myself that i could move on, that i could be satisfied with being just friends. but every time, it felt wrong, like i was trying to force something that wasn't meant to be," haechan said. taking in his confession seems silly to you because you never thought you would be sitting here having him confess after years of pining for him in the shadows.

"i can't change the past, and i can't undo my mistakes," haechan admits, his voice filled with regret. "but what i can promise you is that i understand how much i feel for you now, and i want to make things right. i want us to stay as best friends but also be together, without holding back or letting anything distract us from each other ever again.”

tears well up in your eyes, a mixture of relief and sadness. the weight you've carried, keeping your feelings hidden, is finally being acknowledged. but there's still a lingering doubt, a fear that this newfound confession is too good to be true.

haechan stops the swing and gets off, taking a step closer, closing the distance between you. his hand reaches out, gently wiping away a tear that trails down your cheek. his touch is tender, his gaze unwavering.

"i don't want to lose you," he whispers, his voice filled with sincerity. "i want to be with you, y/n. and for real this time, no more dating other people and having my heart broken. can you forgive me for not realizing it sooner? can you give us a chance?"

you stare into Haechan's eyes, searching for any hint of deception, but all you find is raw honesty and vulnerability. the doubts that once clouded your mind begin to dissipate as his words and actions speak volumes.

a sense of warmth spreads through your heart, overpowering the lingering fear. you take a deep breath, letting the weight of your own unspoken desires slowly lift from your shoulders. with a shaky voice, you respond, "haechan, i... i do forgive you. and i want to give us a chance too."

a radiant smile brightens haechan's face, and a mixture of relief and joy fills his eyes. the connection between you deepens, and you realize that this moment is the turning point—the beginning of something wonderful.

as the air crackles with anticipation and the weight of your shared confession lingers in the atmosphere, haechan's gaze softens, his eyes locked with yours. the world seems to fade away, leaving just the two of you in this tender moment.

he takes a small step closer, his breath mingling with yours. "y/n, can i... can i kiss you?" he asks, his voice filled with genuine concern and a touch of nervousness. haechan wants to make sure that every step he takes is consensual, respecting your boundaries even if you two are best friends.

a smile graces your lips, and your heart flutters at his sweet gesture. you reach out, gently placing your hand on his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips. "yes, haechan," you whisper softly, your voice carrying a blend of excitement and affection.

with that silent permission, haechan closes the remaining distance between you, his hand sliding to the small of your back as he leans in, his lips gently brushing against yours. the touch is tender and delicate, like the flutter of butterfly wings, but it carries a depth of emotion that words fail to describe.

in that moment, time stands still. the world fades away, leaving only the sensation of his lips against yours, the warmth and softness that envelops you. it feels like a climax of every unspoken word, every hidden longing finally finding comfort in this simple yet profound act.

as the kiss lingers, the two of you find comfort in the depth of your relationship. it's a testament to the trust and love that has grown between you—a love that grew from friendship and now blooms in the gentle embrace of this shared affection.

when the kiss ends, you both pull away slowly, breathless and filled with an overwhelming sense of contentment. haechan's eyes meet yours, and a bright, joyful smile graces his face, mirrored by your own.

you never thought you'd find yourself at this moment, wrapped in the embrace of your best friend. the journey that led you here was a tapestry woven with laughter, tears, and unspoken feelings. and now, as you stand together, hearts laid bare, you realize that the love you share surpasses boundaries.

in haechan's arms, you find relief and entirety. the weight of past mistakes and unspoken feelings has dispersed, replaced by a deep understanding. his eyes, filled with sincerity and regret, speak volumes. though the past can’t be rewritten, you can tell he’s determined to make things right once again.

you’re also determined to make things right once again, and this time follow your heart in speaking for yourself. you'll forever be haechan’s good person, the one who understands him deeply, no matter who’s breaking his heart. not that you would ever.

[class-1b-bull]

Can we share some nonsense about class B since they don't get the spot light enough?

Wrote most of this during my break at the cunt factory so it may be a little rushed /hj

Not proofread we die like men

Awase - one of his favorite things to go is weld one of his friends shoes to the ground before taking their phone or walet so they have to chase him barefoot.

Sen - during training once he missed a punch and drilled himself into the concrete and they had to get 3+ people to get him out

Kamakiri - once when Kamakiri was training with Tetsutetsu he trew him through a wall only for it to lead to the girls bathroom... they had to clean the entire dorms for like 3 weeks lol

Kuroiro - he tried to compliment his crush one time but the way he phrased it sounded like an insult and he was too scared to correct them when they pointed it out. Rip.

Kendo - there has been multiple times where one of her classmates has called her mom accidentally.

Kodai - she accidentally scared the shit out of Kamakiri once when she tried to ask him a question (he didnt see her walk up to him lmao)

Komori - she has forced awase to help her sew clothes before. He welds the fabric in place so it sticks before she secures it. The only reason awase agrees to do this is because she has a video of him falling down some stairs lmao

Shiozaki - her vine hair has thorns in it so its pretty common for her hair to latch onto one of her classmates clothes. (The class had to spend over an hour untangling her vines from Shishidas fur once)

Shishida - Shishida has a designed spot in the living area because he sheds so much. That chair is covered in fur 24/7 and its vacuumed twice a day

Shoda - he climbed onto the kitchen counter to reach something that was particularly high up once but he ended up falling lmao. He layed on the kitchen floor for like 15 minutes out of embarrassment even though no one was around

Pony - she still cant read Japanese all that well so theres been multiple times where she walked into the guys locker room/ bathroom

Tsubaraba - he tried to impress a girl by using his solid air to ask for her number but he ended up having a panic attack in front of her lmao

Tetsutetsu - he unironically says hes getting hard as a way to say hes gonna use his quirk. He hasent figured out why everyone gives him weird looks when he says that yet.

Tokage - once rin caught her eating an entire tub of icecream by herself on the kitchen floor at like 3am. Poor dude just wanted a glass of water.

Manga - one time he drew and cut out a life-sized version of himself and put his uniform on the cut out to see if vlad king would notice. He didnt.

Honenuki - one time honenuki apologized to a wall after walking into it. Only to then (immediately after) apologize to the same wall for thinking it was a person.

Bondo - he helps manga with arts and crafts all the time. And he was one of the main people that helped manga with his cutout mission (read mangas for context)

Monoma - the one time he said something nice about class A someone somehow got a video of it and showed it to their entire class. Class B treated monoma with that video for almost a full month lmao

Reiko - reiko and kuroiro work together to scare the shit out of there class every now and then but they stopped after it caused Kamakiri to punch an innocent manga in the face

Rin - not really some random nonsense he has done but I like to think if you press the right pressure points he activates his quirk involuntarily. Kinda like when a doctor hits that one spot in your knee and your leg kicks up.

I have no clue why but I really struggled writing for some of the students on this one rip... my mind was empty lmao

[octoooo]

Actually now that I’ve finished Sailor Moon (90s) I can finally talk about Usagi & Mamoru.

I don’t like them together.

And I’m not sorry about it.

Their 90s relationship feels like a fairytale love story born out of obligation to their past lives & not real feelings. That’s how it came off at least.

Keep in mind how I mentioned 90s specifically, this ain’t about the manga or Crystal.

Now maybe I’m smoking crack or I simply forgot, but,,didn’t they dislike each other for the longest time? Throughout Season 1 at least, Before either of them realized they fight together as Sailor Guardian & Tuxedo Mask I mean. Usagi hated Mamoru especially when he called her “Bun Head.”

And Mamoru seemed teasing sure, but not romantically interested from their meetings on the street. Usagi was crushing on Tuxedo Mask, but she actively hoped that Mamoru wasn’t him.

And then they learned of their past relationship as Princess Serenity & Prince Endymion and?? Now it’s like “oh let’s be together! I think we’re meant to be!” It’s just,,it felt like obligation to me.

Idk maybe they fell in love off screen but like,,,why couldn’t we see it? Isn’t this their story? Shouldn’t we see the main lovers actually develop so I can feel something for them?

I cheered when Mamoru broke up with Usagi, I was like genuinely happy about that lol.

Also the 90s fucked up their age gap. Mamoru is now a college student (no given age) & Usagi is still 14 (eventually 15 in season 2 I think then 16 by the end) but like??

Kinda odd it went down like that y’know? I dunno about you but I hear “college student” and “middle schooler” I’m 💀

I’ve seen speculation that 90s Mamoru is 16 like his manga counterpart but he’s just really smart & went to college early.

Okay

Not impossible I guess,

But we don’t really have any information to assume that? In canon at least, maybe the animators came out and said something about it that I’m not aware of.

I can use Ami as a reference.

Because she’s in Usagi’s grade she’s also 14-16 and We KNOW she’s smart. She’s always top of her class & getting perfect scores, She spends her free time studying & was even offered a spot in a foreign university. She’s the smart one, it’s beaten over our heads numerous times. When she has conversations with Mamoru about topics outside her friend’s knowledge it only benefits her. Those scenes don’t do anything to show “oh Mamoru is really super duper smart to know all of this,” like it does for Ami. As an eighth grader, she wouldn’t be expected to know much about the topics Mamoru’s interested in, but she DOES because she’s SMART & we’re told this all the time.

Mamoru though?? We’re told he’s a college student. So we are to assume he just,,has to/wants to know this, meaning he IS smart. But he’s not extraordinarily smart like Ami, so I don’t think I can’t believe he’s a 16yr old who went straight to college.

Seiya & Usagi had a more developed relationship tbh.

Like, Seiya starts off not really caring for Usagi but then they like her enough to be friends, and eventually develop romantic feelings for her. Also, from their perspective Mamoru is a shitty guy so ofc he wouldn’t want Usagi to be with him. Like, as long as Seiya had known Usagi, she had cried over her “botfriend” and had absolutely zero contact with the guy. Of course they eventually learn it was because of the Shadow Galaxia but before learning that, Usagi seems hung up on some guy who does not feel the same for her, and Seiya is RIGHT THERE and they’re SO devoted.

Also Seiya didn’t want Usagi to be Sailor Moon, because that would mean that Usagi might be their enemy (can’t be beefing with the love interest now can you?) even after learning that, Seiya went to many great lengths where their affection showed through clear as day. I mean, the amount of times they took a hit for Sailor Moon or cradled her to protect her,,,,

Of course they would never end up together. Usagi was very clear about not wanting to be with anyone but Mamoru, yet Seiya kept pushing Which is yikes. But at least I got to see actual romance ? Got to see romantic feelings for Usagi from someone who genuinely cared. I can tell Usagi loves Mamoru (I think) but Mamoru is like,,,,so stiff with her. He protects her because he has to, like the other Guardians, it doesn’t feel born out of love line Seiya’s protectiveness.

Siiigh anyway I’m ready to be eaten alive by UsaMamo fans. Keep in mind this only covers the 90s anime, I have no idea how they are in the manga or Crystal as I haven’t seen much of it yet. I’ve heard it’s better in them, but I don’t wanna get my hopes up.

[avenin7]

Can we hear more about your stoner Link shy nerd Revali AU?? 👀 The art fo that was so cute I still havnt recovered.

awwaaaahhhh!! thank you! I’d love to talk about it!

It’s a highschool au {not set in my modern au canon} where Link is a gnc not fully realized trans kid who’s a part of the alt crowd in his school (if you went to usa american high school, you know the one. that usually has all the queer kids who smoke cigs and are punk as hell). He moved to town in his freshman year and was really quiet and out of the way until his sophomore year when he started hanging with the alt crowd (Urbosa, Yunobo, Mipha, Impa/Purah [Daruk and Zelda by proxy] and started reeking of weed.

Revali on the other hand is a very straight A’s student. Top of his class with Zelda. And has an extremely overbearing mother who limits a lot of what he can do and really wants him to focus on his education Only.

Revalink ends up in a project together for a class and initially Revali was not looking forward to it. Expecting Link to be lazy and make him to all the work. So he was avoidant and aggressive towards him at first. Until they had to meet up and actually work on something and he realized that Link was really a good student. Not as gifted or really smart, but driven to learn and get the work done. So Revali ends up really embarrassed at how he treated Link at first (Link is very cool about it and doesn’t care lmao) and they start hanging out! Eventually Revali realizes that these “scary alt kids” are actually really nice, even if they smoke and are often loud and rambunctious. He starts developing a crush on Link the more they hang out (jokes on him, she likes him too!) and he really doesn’t want his mom to find out the kids he’s started being friends with so he starts lying and rebelling against her. [mostly lying about who he’s seeing and where he’s going so he can see Link longer lol].

Eventually Link offers to smoke with Revali because he talks about how he’s neurodivergent and it helps him a lot and Revali seems stressed. It takes a bit for Revali to warm up to the idea but he does and MAN does it help. So they become smoke buddies (and also start maybe experimenting the way that kids their age do).

There’s a lot of cutesy scenes and mostly oblivious Link with a lot of pining Revali. In both the hs au’s I have it’s a very ‘high school innocence’ type vibe. The grit and raw emotion of the modern au can be exhausting so they’re both palate cleansers for the soul haha

I love talking about these! Thank you for the ask!!

[jjeoni-7]

I wish I were Heather

{Soobin x Black Reader}

Sypnosis: In which Y/n has a the biggest crush on the popular guy Soobin, but finds herselfs in an embarassing situation and learns that he unfortunatly has a crush on the popular girl instead.

Genre: fluff, and angst.

this story is inspired from a real life experience :'D 

Warning: A LOT! of skips so beware in advance lol.

ft: Itzy: Yeji and Lia

•─────⋅⋅─────•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•─────⋅⋅─────•

Y/n pov 

I'm about to cry. Now the whole class is teasing me because they ALL know that I have a crush on the one and only Choi Soobin EVEN Soobin himself knows and said nothing about it...Well was about to I think, until I freaked out and hid behind my friend out of embarrassment. Now this little friendship we had is destroyed. All thanks to Lia who told one of Soobin's girl best friends, this girl can't keep quiet at all.

-flashback

I was talking to my friends while we were doing an art project when Jiseul  (Soobin’s girl best friend) joined us, and all of my crush on him was brought up "who has a crush on Soobin?" She asked looking at us questionably, I made a hush sign telling my friends not to tell knowing her reputation that she can't keep secrets but Lia didn't listen "y/n does, she loves him so much she won't shut up about him" she replied as they started teasing me, I blushed looking at Soobin laughing with his friend group, and then Jiseul ran to them "Jiseul don't-" too late she already told him now he was looking at me and Beomgyu said something in his ear to which he listened and they walked towards me. Me in the freaking out state ran away and hid behind Yeji until they walked away, from that day on the whole class was teasing me, and he was never seen talking with me again.

-end of flashback  

Now it's awkward talking with him. He became more distant than before and kept a stern face on.

*a while later in the school year*

I was drawing a picture of a boy and a girl laughing together which was pretty cute and made me wonder about Soobin, so I wrote beside it 'Soobin x y/n' and put a heart beside it  "aww did you draw this for Soobin" Jiseul said out of the sudden smiling at my picture, "no it's for myself, don't mind it-" "wait y/n let me see" Lia said as I gave it to her "it's so cute Soobin should see that" she said with a smirk "Lia i'm warning you if you-" she already ran fast towards Soobin with Yeji and Jiseul encouraging her,and before I could chase after her. Soobin looked at the paper with no emotions then threw it in the trash saying "I don't like her." My heart shattered "it's not even for you anyways why are you throwing my art in the trash" I said finally facing him mad at his action. He kept quiet and walked away with his friends home as if nothing happened. I hate him...But I can't I still love him nonetheless. I picked up my drawing from the trash heartbroken and mad at the girls, I just lost my pretty drawing because of their stubbornness “ You guys should listen to me, and stop lamely trying to get him to like me cuz he’s doesn’t” I said before walking away  ignored their shouts, and went home.

*the next day*

Lia, Jiseul, and Yeji came towards me and apologized for their actions "I'm so sorry y/n please forgive me" Lia pleaded with tears in her eyes as everyone looked at us "ugh fine, fine just stop embarrassing me" I said as she, and the 2 others got up happily hugging me. Later that day at Recess Jiseul came running to us "Soobin has a crush!" she said excitedly "who is it?" I asked suddenly interested "unfortunately it's not you it's Aeun" she replied "oh sure I don’t care anyways, it's not like he was ever gonna love me" I replied continuing my paused activity with a smile on my face feeling somehow disappointed.

*in Gym class*

 "they look cute together tho don't you think" I said to my friends as they both snorted "yeah right" Lia said "are you really shipping them together when you still like him? " Yeji asked "of course, you can't force feelings" I said, tying my shoes "seriously I wonder what's so good about this girl that guys like, she's been dating almost all your crushes" Yeji said "well a lot of stuff" I replied "like?" Lia asked "she's Korean, pretty, kind and sweet, besides she looks friendly" I replied "Girls 1 minute!" the gym teacher yelled "let's go, we'll talk after" I added as we all got out.

We started playing Badminton with partners, and guess what? My partner was Soobin, we started playing when  in the middle of the game (favorite song) started playing. I started dancing a bit while playing and sang a little as my friends happily joined me laughing, since they weren’t playing. Even Soobin was smiling and laughing while trying to make me lose "haha you lost" I exclaimed when the birdie fell on his side "pfft whatever" he said rolling his eyes playfully " have you ever thought of being a dancer? You’re good at dancing" he said laughing "thanks I guess" I replied laughing. My... I miss these days. He would tease me and make my heart flutter. It's funny that after making me sad he makes me laugh as if nothing happened, but then Aeun came beside him and his eyes were glued on her like she was the most beautiful thing in the world. 

Since it was the end of Gym class I left and went to my friends " my, she's annoying" Lia said " it’s alright girls, stop judging her she isn't that bad" I said " yes, but I kind of hate the way she sticks to him all the time" Jiseul said " oh my you scared us where do you come from?" I asked " from the sky, and fell right in front of you" she joked as we all laughed, later I learned that Aeun was asking Soobin out in front of the whole school.

I went and watched with my friends. " I've had a crush on you ever since I knew you liked me" she bragged " would you love to be my boyfriend?" she asked " actually I..." he said looking around and looked at me. He approached towards me asking my hand, and I panicked " common you got it girl" Jiseul said as my other friends encouraged me, I hesitantly took his hand and he led me to the front " not to be rude but, I actually love y/n, I know I've been rude to you, and distant, but I love you more than you think" he said as some of the students gasped " so sorry Aeun, but I don't like you" he said as the students gasped  and Aeun stared at me from up and down " what do you see in her, she's not even pretty, neither Korean" she replied " actually Aeun, love is more than appearance, and race it's about the person's qualities and personality" Soobin said " well it's true that appearance can make a difference, but what can it do when you're pretty, but with a nasty attitude?" he added asking as she scoffed, and walked away with her minions at her heels.

I looked at Soobin, still flabbergasted, and said, suspiciously, “ are you doing this to get rid of her?” I asked as he shook his head “ I really love you y/n, I do a lot” he said " but why were you mean all the time?" I asked and he chuckled " I didn’t know how to react to it, I was scared of rejection, but learning that you liked me, made me panic, and not to forget the fact that you ran away when I was about to talk to you" he said as I nodded feeling embarrassed " So y/n, do you want to be my girlfriend?" he added “ I would love to, but first apologies for throwing my drawing in the trash” I replied " Which one-? Oh about that one, I’m Very Very sorry l/n for throwing your drawing in the trash, I promise to keep them all in the future, even the ugly ones." he teased as I rolled my eyes chuckling " Since you apologized, I would love to be your girlfriend" I replied ,making him smile and spin me around and kiss me as the crowd cheered and clapped, Jiseul, Lia and Yeji clapped louder " that's my bro!" Jiseul shouted at me and Soobin pulled apart, and laughed at what she said. " you're mine now" he said hugging me " yes, I'm yours" I replied smiling, I never thought still liking him would have paid off in the end. Maybe if I hadn’t ran away, he would have confessed earlier, but I’m still happy he did at the end.

The end

well...not all stories end happily ever after. Mine didn't, and it never did with my crushes because of so many reasons. But since I like happy endings, I changed it. This story is again INSPIRED so not all the events in it are true, anyways hope you liked my story, have a good day/ night 😚:).

[aduah]

Greetings Aduah

I have something to ask you if it's okay

Cn we have Sonia's backstory?

I really like your ocs and au in general ❤️

I have a counter question: why Sonia?? Is it because I've rarely talked about her? Is it because she died young and never got the chance to be a mother???

And kjshfaksjdfhlaskdjhfasd thanks a lot!!! Glad you like my stuff!!! ;;;

Well, whatever's the reason, LET'S DITCH EVERYTHING I'VE EVER SAID ABOUT HER AND SASHA because I'm gonna re-write her (and consequentially their) backstory NOW!

Long text ahead, sorry!

Sonia and Sasha Vittoriani were born on March 7th, 1990 in a little town in Tuscany (yeah, let's ditch the "they're from Rome" thing because of personal reasons). They grew up in a quiet environment, surrounded by mountains but also a few minutes from the sea, so they got to experience both of them! Sonia was more of a sea person, while Sasha was more of a mountain one.

Except for this, the two were close and similar: they both liked hanging out with friends, shopping, music, and dancing. As kids, they liked to dress the same, but as teens, Sonia took more of a "tomboy" style while Sasha was pretty feminine. Still, their stiles would match, no matter what!

Sonia had a passion for dancing, stronger than her sister, that's why she attended dance classes since she was 6.

They both discovered Beyblade when the first world tournament was being broadcast and immediately decided they wanted to try it! And... they sucked, lol. But still, they loved the sport immensely, so much so that they started saving and making plans to actually go see one live!

They managed to do so for the GRev one when they got in Italy, and here, the first headcanon for Sonia and Takao starts.

While Takao was hanging around with Tao, at some point he walked away from all that "fashion shopping" to relax, and sat right next to Sonia. Needless to say, Sonia almost died when she realized she was sitting next to Takao! She tried to make small talk in English, but Takao pretty much ignored her and left when he saw his team in difficulty against BORG. Sonia couldn't shut up about the encounter the whole day with Sasha (notice: Sasha had the same experience (sort of) with Max, who was still pretty down because everyone was against the PPB, but the two managed to have a talk and also exchange contacts!).

Jump one year later; there was a contest and the winner would have the possibility to follow around the Japanese team for the whole duration of the WBC! The twins did their best and actually got picked, so they got to follow the reformed G Revolution around the world as they fought!

Takao and Sonia... didn't get along too much, because everytime Takao tried to teach her beyblade, she would fail. It was some sort of Daichi vs Takao all over again, but everyone teased that they liked each other. They... did. But they wouldn't admit it.

They start to talk more and hang out more, and at the end of the tournament, when the team wins, Sonia can't hold it and kisses Takao in front of the whole stadium. And from there, they're together!

They managed to make it work through distance thanks to raising technology, emails, and chats, and sometimes they would visit each other (of course, Max or Sasha would tag along for convenience!).

She was with him when he started having heart problems. She kept around when Takao revealed he still had a big crush on Kai and was jealous of Lara (Takao is actually poly). She did all she could to make it work, even if... things started to deteriorate from that confession.

She became anxious and jealous, the two would argue more than before, and probably they would've broken up if... she hadn't gotten pregnant.

She was sure that now Takao would stick around, and he tried his best, without telling her that he was being eaten alive by stress and anxiety, and his heart was holding all that weight.

It wasn't good.

Everything ended on a faithful night when Sonia was involved in a car accident with her older brother Gabriele.

Takao took the first plane he could find, but when he arrived, she was gone. And Yury was there.

He decided to move to Italy to take care of the baby, helped by Sonia's family.

Sasha held a grudge against Takao for a long time, saying that her sister should be there, not the kid. Takao too lived with guilt for years, trying to push it back to make sure Yury could grow up without worries.

I have a HC that, if she had survived, probably she would have lied to Takao and said the kid died, to cut all ties with Takao. She would also lie to Sasha, telling her the kid she saw around was someone else's. That would be a really depressing, bad ending AU, even more than the normal one.

[yuutakei]

final love song,,weird fishes/arpeggi

sometimes i convince myself i’ve moved on, that there is not a shred of love left inside of me. even still, upon hearing every song we shared, my eyes fail to hold back the ocean of tears that pool at my faltering waterline. it's an unbearable bittersweetness. i feel my heart plunge into to the depths of the sea.

i press play; try to surround myself in a warm darkness. but, my mind is taken back to a warm summer evening. it feels like yesterday.

a rouge dusk falls over mosquito-plagued suburbia skies. my sister had driven us out, knowing it was our last gathering before i moved away. i stood on the supple grass that lay plentiful in a stranger’s yard, clutching to your chest as if the wind had whispered a threat to blow you away with the leaves - holding you impossibly closer. and, through my ears, echoed a mind-bendingly beautiful cover of this song. i was so absorbed in every inch of your existence i couldn't even raise my head to look at the band playing to our left.

unbeknownst partygoers had emerged from within the house to listen, humming and dancing under the falling light as the song drew on. underneath the ripples of fluttering clothes on the washing line, the frightened corners of my lips turned into a smile. looking at you, i felt as if, for the first time, i could see through the clouds in your crystal-blue eyes. softly, they whispered the same words of love that were thrumming inside my beating heart. i felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

that night at your doorstep,

i kissed you for the last time.

✿ ‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̥°̩̥‧̥·̊ ✿ °̩̥‧̥‧̥ ‧̥˚̩̩̥͙·‧̥·̊‧̥ ✿ ͚⠀ٝ 𓉮ֶ⠀ ⠀ 🗡 ⠀♥︎̼̻ ⠀ ⠀ 𓏶⠀

notes:: ⤵⤵⤵

originally wrote this around a year and a half ago!! it was about 2ish months post-breakup and this song came on shuffle...best believe there were some tears i grabbed my phone and started typing into my notes app and ended up with this (although i did tweak it a bit since my writing has changed improved?? over the past twelve months)

we met at college (he was 17 and i was 16) and he reached out after seeing me play guitar in the courtyard to a small crowd. he went through all my friends to find me online and promptly confessed he'd seen me around campus. i'd been a 'hallway crush' of his for some time and had mysteriously disappeared granted i was still attending classes lol, causing a bout of panic. by a stroke of fate, he saw me again on the courtyard stage, with my shitty fender squire i'd been gifted on my 14th birthday playing 'horen sarrionson' (iykyk). i guess it was a 'now or never' moment from then.

we ate lunch together a few times, which turned into hanging out after school, to finding out he was a 10 minute walk from my house, to kissing him in the back of a car after getting lost in a sketchy neighbourhood late at night and needing a pick-up from his mother.

i was his girlfriend for the better part of 9 months. it started off as a dream. he was everything i wanted and having someone care about me and obsess over the parts of me i hated graced me with a comfort i had never felt before. around 2 months before his graduation and my exams, we consecutively shared and experienced the most traumatic parts of our teenage years and had seen the worst parts of each other, some of which never left.

heartbreak sucks!!! i had to break up with the boy i loved over text (we were hundreds of miles away) during a first-period literature class and cry myself to sleep alone in my dorm every night for weeks :')

but love is never wasted.

and i will continue to love and hurt until my bones turn to dust.